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humming-fly · 9 months

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every year for my birthday I do something self-indulgent and THIS year it's me finally organizing all the doodles and lore for my kirby oc Fayre that I have yet to put on tumblr into one place!

because i love you all putting the vast majority of this under a readmore but yeah if you want a collection of doodles and vaguely coherent scraps of info about my little guy please read on and if you want to ask questions about 'em go for it i love talking about these idiots

gonna also be mentioning a few other OC's here so for the record Strix belongs to @alagaesia-overlord and Stell belongs to @aseuki, because everyone knows it's more fun being insane about something if you have company~

real quick gonna just link to the past main posts on fayre for posterity lol

Fayre Details/Backstory:

So as has already been established in prior posts fayre is a very fae-aligned little critter that pretty exclusively hangs out in the woods with their 1-way mirror mask behaving for all intents of the word like some sort of weird cryptid. In terms of defining characteristics they have a set of very odd wings that constantly emit a stunning aura that causes confusion/distress when observed at close quarters, as well as a permanent 0.0 expression that they can't change (so no blinking, smiling, etc.) which is a byproduct of their creation as a mirror clone.

How all that worked out is their 'original', Prism, landed right next to a mirror portal as a newborn and more or less immediately wandered into it - my general headcanon about how the mirror doubles work is that they're made up of Every reflection someone has made up to the point they look into the amazing mirror, but since prism only just existed her first and only reflection was the 0.0 expression of a child looking through the mirror before passing through it, so fayre is locked and loaded with that expression but nothin' else. This is also why fayre's wings are way different than prism's bird-of-paradise setup, as technically prism's back was never reflected by the mirror either so it got the randomizer setting instead.

Despite being 'born' more or less at the same time the two never formally met until many years later, as prism wandered right into the mirror world and fayre wandered right out into the primary world and neither ever looked back. Differences aside, when prism did eventually track fayre down they immediately hit it off and now consider each other to be twin siblings. (Prior to meeting Prism Fayre didn't know they were a mirror clone, but largely took learning that detail in stride, as they do with most things)

In terms of early life fayre was actually found and raised by a small village of broom hatters, who came upon this child in a little crater they'd made after falling off the cloud holding up the mirror

The broom hatters assumed that fall was what had paralyzed their face, but fortunately as the broom hatters are a race of faceless creatures themselves the lack of expressions wasn't ever a problem. Not being able to move or open their mouth means fayre can't talk with it, but instead uses the general telepathic way of speaking used by most species lacking that particular facial feature. The main benefit of that skill is being able to throw their voice and also talk in hieroglyphics if desired

Fayre stayed with the broom hatters until reaching early adolescence, after which they left to go explore the natural world - though now living on their own they do still come back to say Hi every year or so during the Sweeping Seasons.

Fayre got their wings sometime while off living by themselves in the woods, and after some trial and error did figure out a way to more or less 'replace' their wings with a funky cape (the trial and error being a learning curve whereupon getting near people with their wings would cause people to get dizzy/sick, so for a while they were wandering around in a little cape they found until they could puzzle out a way to properly tuck them away) - while the cape is replacing the wings they're more or less 'in stasis', so damaging the cape doesn't damage the wings and vice versa, and is more of a strange pocket dimensional swap than anything. Thus the cape can't actually be removed from fayre, trying to rip it off them won't hurt or anything but will probably just yank them around a bit (maybe they're somehow trading their wings with an equivalent in the yarn dimension? who knows, they certainly don't)

The wings themselves are pretty odd as they look sort of like dragonfly wings but are actually made up of individual feathers of varying traits - general consensus is they are indeed very pretty, but other than gliding fayre can't actually fly that well with them. The stunning aura on them Does keep bugs and wildlife away though making them ideal for forest exploration, and fayre will wrap themselves up in them every night when going to bed as the wings work to deter any predators from going after them, and it's Comfy

~Plot Stuff Begins~

Meeting Strix:

For quite a while Prism was the only consistent point of contact Fayre had with anyone else, and even then the two only visited one another infrequently, both happy to largely keep to the homes and lives they've carved out for themselves.

The first major change to fayre's day to day life was the introduction of another puffball named Strix, who happened upon them while looking for their wayward coworker

After conversing a bit it was discovered that Strix is actually employed as a Reaper, of the paper-pushing variety, and only tends to poke their head out of purgatory when hunting down their work-shirking coworker.

Said work-shirking coworker is also the reason strix is the only person fayre has met that isn't affected by their wing's wonky aura - spending a few centuries in close quarters with someone who puts out a very similar status effect tends to build up an immunity, which fayre tries their best to take full advantage of

Fayre and Strix managed to hit it off early on, and occasionally meet up every month or so for an hour or two to get their required socializations in before wandering back off from whence they came. Strix will often share their work bereavements, or encourage fayre to actually learn some self-defense, which is largely met with playful ambivalence, though despite fayre's general disinterest in combat some minor progress was made on strix's part

(To that end farther the line a more favorable and not at all ominous deal was struck between the two so time will tell how that pans out)

During one of these chats strix also shared some of their Tragic Backstory:tm:, which fayre empathized with in the only way they know how

These friendly meetings continued with regularity for some odd years, up until fayre accidentally rode-along on one of strix's business calls~

Meeting Stell (aka The 'Among-Us' Arc):

Unfortunately for Fayre, Strix had been called to investigate what was reported to be an erroneous wish caused by a faulty comet, one without its proper safety regulations in place. Fayre tumbled on through strix's portal and into the sidelines of an ongoing fight between strix and some new armored fighter apparently affiliated with said comet.

Hoping to avoid whatever anime-ass conflict was going on over there, fayre started drifting towards the only other point in space of any note, the giant cat-like mechanical comet. Unfortunately for fayre, whoever had maintained that comet had rigged it up with a series of perimeter defenses, which fayre became intimately familiar with as they were shot down and forced to land on the comet itself to escape the bullet-hell firing at them.

Suffering some fun knicks and scrapes predominantly on their wings fayre pushed that on the back burner with their cape and started to look for an exit from this weird mechanical death trap. (Past this point Fayre has a quasi-permanent notch in their left feather).

Thus began fayre's fun-filled two-ish weeks of impromptu among us where they had a jolly time hiding in the vents and cutting wires to stall the maniac doing their level best to eject them with lethal force

Eventually contact was made with the assailant, whose name was apparently Stell, and an agreement was brokered just as Strix finally decided to stop by again to see how fixing that busted-ass comet was going.

after that misunderstanding was cleared up Fayre finally got off that shitty comet and after being dropped off in the woods by strix managed to trudge all the way to the mirror dimension to visit prism and get some bandaids (slash bullet holes patched up)

Mirror Arc & Beyond:

Some additional fun is had with the twins in the mirror dimension, namely the whole kitten kaboodle becoming corrupted for a time and fayre becoming a bit of an asshole because of it, which predominantly ended up aimed at strix who popped by to help sort all that out

post-corruption fayre found out apparently strix took the verbal abuse personally and fixed that all right up in their own way by visiting them at their workplace

tragically for fayre's happy-go-lucky attitude they've come to be attached to strix, which only became obvious once strix relayed a recent near-death experience to them and they got to experience their first ever Bummer Emotion

making that extra fun was learning said near-death experience was caused by their good friend Stell, which in turn lead to fayre's first ever Catching Hands Emotion

fayre's emotional roller coaster topped out after more or less jumping stell in a convenience store and trying to forcibly shove their own negative emotions down his throat after he brushed off the encounter he'd had with strix (partially due to running a high fever but that sure wasn't fayre's problem) - since then they've leveled back out and are back to being the most emotionally well-balanced of the three, which is a low bar to clear but hey first place is still first place~

#why yes this Is a birthday gift to myself #internet backups are important and also fun to find down the line hahaha #anyways hope you all enjoy my Special Little Guy #also tw for flashing image way at the bottom of this massive post #long post #like for real it's a Long post i used the full 30 images #fayre #kirby oc #ahh #my art #doodles

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evevoli · 6 months

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original story concept: flight feathers (working title)

aka me shoving my new OCs in everyone's faces for a few minutes. low and behold, my gang of losers:

from left to right: Phoenix, Selene, Helios, and Killian

so a wayward beam of divine insanity lightning struck me about four months ago in the form of the first genuinely coherent original story idea i've had in... basically forever and i am finally crawling out of my mad ornithologist lab to talk about it, if only so i have something to point to when i start tagging random innocuous text posts with the names of characters no one's ever heard of. this project is perhaps the most self-indulgent Autism Fueled venture i have ever gone on and it is so fun actually

the basic gist of the story is that local Teenage Bird Hater Selene accidentally gets isekai'd to a Greco-Roman/baroque-inspired city on a floating archipelago hidden in the clouds, inhabited by bird-worshipping winged people. there she befriends a strange one-winged fortune teller named Phoenix, who takes her in while she looks for a way back down to earth.

as a certified Bird Disliker(tm) for reasons she will absolutely not disclose, the idea of being trapped in this city with its strange bird-entrenched culture has got to be Selene's personal hell. but she's already made a few good friends and is learning a lot, so hey... if you ignore the castle surrounded by doves looming off in the distance, and the general poor sentiment surrounding corvids, maybe it's not such a bad place to be after all.

...until it turns out the King himself might have it out for her, much to the dismay of his son and loyal knight, Prince Helios and Captain Killian.

there is. A Lot more to it than that lol—and at least like 8 more characters i haven't gotten to drawing yet—but there's your elevator pitch. to explain the world a bit more, everyone has bird wings to fly with, their own Bird Familiars(tm), and rides around on pegasi and different species of griffin. the world consists of little islands connected by bridges, with the city developed vertically, and sort of resembles a fusion between the Aether mod in Minecraft and Zephyr Heights in MLP G5.

and now the most important thing, the Closeups

some notes:

Selene is transfem :), Helios is transmasc only because i tried giving him curled ram horns and got so frustrated trying to draw them i just gave up and gave him the ewe ones instead

Selene is a Wolf Kid and really vibes with the lyrics to Angel of Darkness on a personal level

Helios's wings are weak and undersized so he can't take off or fly for very long on his own

i like to consider Helios my personal challenge to design the most unapologetically cringe and archetypal character ever. i am going to make a character that is so sad little loser prince. kicks him

Phoenix is a childhood nickname, Killian is just a shortened form of Achilles. Phoenix absolutely hates his birth name. Killian is ambivalent towards his

Phoenix lost his left wing in an accident that changed the trajectory of his life forever teehee :3c

the little blue jay is named Celeste, the crow is Peanut, and the tawny owl is Athena :)

and that is all i shall reveal in this post >:) this idea has been rotting my brain from the inside out for months now so don't hesitate to shoot me an ask if you're wondering about anything :]

#so nervous finally posting this stuff lol #flight feathers #evff #<- that is the best general tag i can think of 💀 trying hard not to spam a fandom with a certain acronym here im so sorry #selene ff #helios ff #phoenix ff #killian ff #original story #my art #ev.post #oc tag

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fifthpilot · 10 months

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People who rally Vash as the "good guy" and nai as the "bad guy" make me wanna pull my hair out because I start thinking about Vash seeing hundreds of plants tortured to death right infront of his eyes and how it gets almost no reaction out of him and I go insane.

guard: plants were made to die for us anyways

nai: *kills him*

vash: D:<!!! but ReM-

lf Vash thinks its his and Knives' fault that plants are only being treated this way because of what they've done why is it HIS call to allow it to happen. Why must one suffer for the sake of another and why is it up to him to decide which is worth sacrificing? When both aren't symbiotic to begin with, when only one needs the other to survive, and when that same species is on the brink of extinction because of it?

Is Vash really thinking that saving the humans is worth the extermination of an entire species of plants?? And do you know who's philosophy this sounds like exactly?? Knives'. They're two sides of the same coin.

Which makes it really funny to me when people can't wrap their heads around how we should be looking at Vash and Knives' actions critically, not from the shallow lens of "one is good because he doesn't kill and the other is bad because he does". Diluting the whole conflict to "killing bad, not killing good" is really boring. and it doesn't give either characters enough accountability or credit for their actions.

I also think we should also assess how for the longest time Vash's stance has always been neutral. He hasn't been as decisive about what how he intends to achieve his ideals like Nai. Vash has advocated that plants and humans can co exist but what has he done so far to prove it?

It's a defensive stance, protecting and helping humans & plants as best as he can but its not productive to either party or to himself. And all it begets is a tired, scarred & bruised Vash that feels that the weight of the world is on his shoulders because he can't do "enough".

Meanwhile plants are still being tortured with "last runs" and humans have still yet to find a way to survive without plants. Often times neutrality is just as damning, if not it partakes in feeding the lasting problems we need to solve.

I just wish we could expand our understanding of what is "right" and "wrong" besides taking things at face value, especially within fiction where it give you the space to think rather than judge.

#trigun #trigun stampede #vash the stamepde #millions knives #kni #nai #trigun thoughts #vash

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everyone-with-a-para · 5 months

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This is the response for the Pokémon ask thing. Sorry for the super late reply, got caught up into some real life things. But please enjoy this deranged ramble :>

Anyways! Grand choice! Grand choice! If I have to be honest, I was anticipating for either one of the Poké villains because they seemed very popular. Though, Cynthia is popular too. Also, a Cynthia dup, huh. Well, that's a first, I usually kept running into Lusa dups in the Daydreaming Discord server I'm in, lmao.

She may not be as lore heavy as the other blonde bitch, but she gets enough to the point of getting a backstory and some significant ties to the paracosm's big bad evil mouse guy.

So, Cynthia.

This Poké para is practically similar or the same as her canon counterpart personality wise. Just more serious and maybe a bit sassy/sarcastic given the trauma and suffering I put her through with the mouse alone. She was very well off at first in lore. A very respected actress for her job when on camera and a renowned fighter when off camera.

Yeah, the main cast in the paracosm are this skinwalker-esque species who are made mainly and solely to act and entertain the audience. In order to do that, they must wear the meat suits of their given characters and bear their names. Should they try to physically diverge or remove the meat suits, let's just say that bad things happen if they try to disown/change their names, and it'd hurt like shit if they remove the skin suit. They don't know who exactly are the audience, but they've been told by their creators over and over again that there are entities watching or playing their work. And these entities must be entertained, get something out of their performances.

Back to Cynthia, she's been very popular amongst the fellow actors thanks to her work/performance, and her character leaving a lasting impression on people. Because of her role as one of the good guys in the canon Pokémon storyline, she has the advantage and the privileges to navigate in a society that favors those who play that role more.

So, how did she got traumatized? How did all that fame, fortune, and privileges slipped past her finger tips?

It all started with a mouse.

In 2010, Cynthia had to perform for Mickey live for his birthday. It was a live performance for Pokémon Platinum. It was all fine and dandy at first. Though, over time, Mickey... Let's say his delusional episode started kicking in. You see, he can easily tell that his own project is an act all the time. But he can't easily tell if the others' works are real or not most of the time, so he has a tendency to attack the villain actors for what their canon personas did. Even if he does tell what is real and an act with some of the others' series, he'll still be a bigot towards villain actors and even commit hate crimes against them.

Towards the end of Cyrus's final act, Mickey tried to attack him in the Distortion World because of his delusions, insanity, and saviour complex. Cynthia saved Cyrus, but at the cost of losing a leg to Mickey. Right after they escaped from the mouse king, they tried to report him to the authorities of the Nintendo Empire. However, the trial kinda ended on a tie or a null. No one got guilty'd or taken to jail. Mickey is a king and can easily get away with a lot of things, this incident and the other Pokémon live performance incidents included. Cynthia still has privileges, so she's spared, and Cyrus just barely survived and only managed to escape from getting enprisoned because Cynthia had him cover.

Some months after the trial, rumours begin to spread, they were about the Sinnoh Champion herself. They can consist of her relationship with Cyrus and being brainwashed by the villain actors to help them overthrow the Nintendo Emperor, Mario. These made everyone become suspicious of Cynthia, leading up to robbing her wealth and her home, along with her socio-economic status. After that, she's been banished into the Villainous Underground, a ghetto-like place where villains, usually from very oppressive territories, live when off camera. Since then, she's been taken in by the residents and just lives there.

Nowadays, she hangs out with the villain actors of her series since they're all she has now. Some of the champion playing colleagues who were once close to her now reject and disown her from their social group thanks to those rumours.

In a following Live Performance incident, Cynthia lost an eye while helping Lysandre. I just thought it'd be neat and cool to give her a key stone for an eye. In another incident, I decided she loses a forearm while helping Lusamine with Mickey's attacks. It doesn't help that it was Ms. President's very first gig and her live first audience was not the Sponge bestie she intended to invite over, but the deranged mouse king himself.

I forgot to add/mentioned that Mickey adn one of the high ranking cult members started a smear campaign on Cynthia's ass and that's how she got angsted

That sounds so much darker and more convoluted to my poké paracosm where they're all just silly little guys with their silly little mons and their silly little family relationships but I kinda love it. My Cynthia isn't a main character in my paracosm but she's trans and immortal and terrified (/hsrs) of a 15 year old that keeps kicking her ass and she's so iconic about it. Girl committed atrocities and it's coming back to bite her 250 years later

#poké anon #sea-adhesiveness537 #quill speaks #ask

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decepti-thots · 1 year

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Hello! It's night here and I am thinking about everything at once. What I suddenly realized is that both Verity and Minimus were basically wearing suits that made them look like (other) Cybertronians (and function, too, though mostly in a defensive/offensive sense?), but in Verity's case she was still her own self, while Minimus pretended to be someone he isn't. I just think that can be sort of a parallel, but maybe I am just stretching it.

I've been turning this one over in my head a bit... I do think it's interesting, anon. What Verity does with her armour doesn't really seem at first brush to be anything like what Minimus does, but on reflection, I think there's something there. Verity running away from Earth in the first place to go with Magnus is basically her attempting to opt out of her life and make a full, fresh start that most people could only dream of. She just... leaves everything about her life before behind, all the traumatic stuff she doesn't want to deal with. It's objectively kind of an insane thing to do- why would you go hang out with a bunch of giant robots who are involved in a terrifying, dangerous war? What would make that seem like the better option? Well, the trade off of really, truly getting to leave everything you hate about your life behind. They're a totally different species, they have no point of reference for your bullshit you want forgetting. And the armour she has is an extension of the idea she wants to be a part of their world, not her own, right? She doesn't take it on to hide her identity, but it does allow her to participate in the new status quo she's picked for herself. It's the thing that lets her start a new life, one where her being human is, if not irrelevant, then less relevant. It lets her keep up. It lets her be not the token human but one of the team, because if she's indispensable, she can stay and not go home.

Whereas Minimus... his Magnus armour is of course a literal attempt to adopt a whole other identity, but it also allows him to leave baggage behind. He's not leaving behind the same thing, but he is trying to make it so he's surrounded by people and a kind of context which means that his old life is so irrelevant it can't even be asked about, because now nobody knows TO ask. And actually, both of their issues start with their families, which I think is a really fascinating accidental intersection for them as characters. Again, the issues are different, but they're issues with points of relatability.

Verity wants to be a different version of herself and Minimus wants to be someone else, but those desires do stem from similar places. I like to think that after the dust settles, post Wrequiem (for Verity) and the quest (for Minimus), they maybe had a chance to talk about things a little more frankly with each other, as people who have been on their own little journeys to a greater emotional maturity since they last spoke.

#minimus ambus #verity #meta

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pzfr · 1 year

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Community (2009-2015) Inspired RP Starters Megapost

NSFW/Suicide/ETC. mentions, feel free to edit for pronouns and whatnot when sending these in.

JEFF WINGER

"You are all better than you think you are, you are just designed not to believe it when you hear it from yourself."

"Harrison Ford is irradiating our testicles with microwave satellite transmissions!"

"Doing more than the minimum amount of work is my definition of failing."

"I see your value now."

"To me, religion is like Paul Rudd. I see the appeal, and I would never take it away from anyone, but I would also never stand in line for it."

"The next person that offers me charity or pity will be mentioned, by name, in my suicide note."

"Let's do what people do. Let's get a house we can't afford and a dog that makes us angry."

"We're the only species on earth that observes shark week."

"TV's the best dad there is. TV never came home drunk, TV never forgot me at the zoo, TV never abused and insulted me..."

"I don't have an ego. My Facebook photo is a landscape."

"Look at me. It's clear to you that I am awesome, but I can never admit that, because that would make me an ass."

"It's called chemistry, I have it with everybody!"

"If crazy people can't be at [PLACE], then where are we supposed to go?"

"Haul it, ball it, never call it. Girls are objects."

"It's a locomotive that runs on us!"

"I discovered at a very early age that if I talked long enough, I could make anything right or wrong. So either I'm god, or the truth is relative. Either way: Booyah."

"I always know that what I'm doing is wrong. I'm just a guy who doesn't like taking tests, doing work, and getting yelled at. So if you think about it, I'm the sanest person here."

"The funny thing about being smart, is that you can get through most of life without ever having to do any work."

"Hey, did you hear about the turtle in China? Two packs a day!"

"I don't step up to being a leader. I reluctantly accept it when it's thrust upon me."

"Don't talk to me about romance. I had a three-way in a hot air balloon."

"I settled on a truth today that is always going to be true: that I'll do anything for my friends."

"These people don't want me to say what I'll do, they want me to do what I'll say!"

"I'm prepared for any insane adventure life throws our way and I don't know about you, but I'm looking forward to every one of them."

"Why are we in such a rush to leave the tide pool when the only things waiting for us on shore are the sands of time and the hungry seagulls of slowly growing apart?"

"Well, it's been real, but I have a date to catch. Or should I say... A catch to date."

"Oh, like you're famous for your wit."

ABED NADIR

"Some flies are too awesome for the wall."

"You can do whatever you want, you just have to know what that is."

"Sometimes the hardest prisons to break out of, are the ones without locks."

"I see your value now."

"We'll definitely be back next year. If not, it'll be because an asteroid has destroyed all human civilization. And that's canon."

"Our first assignment is a documentary. They're like real movies, but with ugly people."

"When you really know who you are and what you like about yourself, changing for other people isn't such a big deal."

"I looked inside Nicolas Cage and I found a secret: People are random and pointless."

"I like football.. but also.. I don't?"

"I got self-esteem flowing out of my butt."

"I need help reacting to something."

"You made me so happy I peed a little."

"When the world gets bad enough, the good go crazy. But the smart... they go bad."

"Did you know you can make napalm out of common dish soap and cat food?"

"I painted a tunnel on the side of the library. When it dries, I'm going for it."

"This is definitely the darkest timeline."

"It's Wednesday, sometimes I eat in [NAME]'s car. Don't tell him."

ANNIE EDISON

"Oh my god! I'm finally popular enough to be in the yearbook!"

"Everybody loves pelicans, they bring babies!"

"I'm the smartest one in the group and all I've been used for is bait and distraction."

"I was so unpopular in high school, the crossing guards used to lure me into traffic."

"[NAME] wants to show me a cloud that looks like a pumpkin!"

"Freeze mamma-jamma!"

"They deploy things in football, right? I went for rhyme over clarity."

"It's like prom. There's a contest and if you win you get to wear a sash and a crown and I'm so jealous I wanna murder you. Aren't you excited?"

"Your last blow-off class taught me to live in the moment which I will always regret and never do again."

"A passing grade? Like a C? Why don't I just get pregnant at a bus station?"

"Do you understand what a conspiracy is? When you conspire with everyone you come across, you're not really conspiring with anyone. You're just doing random crap."

"Whatevs, we'll take it next semes. Ter. Semester."

"That was a game. This is paintball."

"Who the hell are you always texting? Everyone you know is here!"

"Put it in a letter, Jane Austen!"

"He was horny, so he dropped him. Man is evil!"

"Accidents don't just happen over and over and over again, okay? This isn't budget daycare."

"Umm... Bitter much?"

TROY BARNES

"Don't eat the crab dip, YA YA!"

"Never change, or do. I'm not your boss."

"Announcement number two: Butt soup!"

"I know you hate it when people do this in movies."

"It was awesome, but also... it wasn't?"

"Kettle corn?! That's a fun time snack!"

"I don't get history. If I wanted to know what happened in Europe a long time ago, I'd watch Game of Thrones."

"I give this year a "D", for delightful!"

"There is a time and place for subtlety, and that time was before Scary Movie."

"I wanna see if wiener dogs are born that way, or if they start off normal and then get wiener."

"Sometimes I think I lost something really important to me, and then it turns out I already ate it."

"If it was cool to eat god, he'd be a chicken finger."

"Do you get paid more if they do stuff to your butt?"

"How 'bout I pound you like a boy?!-- That didn't come out right."

"Didn't we decide at the beginning of the year that for the good of the group we wouldn't allow any intimacy between each other or ourselves?"

"If we get bit we could turn into a zombie. The banana said so."

"First time I was punched in the face, I was like "Oh no!", but then I was like "this is a story...""

"Do they find thoughts in our butts?"

PIERCE HAWTHORNE

"That thing some call failure, I call living. Breakfast. And I'm not leaving until I've cleaned out the buffet."

"Your social skills aren't exactly streets ahead, know what I mean?"

"It's a sickness, I admit. But this place has always accepted me sickness and all."

"Oh no, you're not letting some slumlord take your your hard earned money. I'll fix it. I used to do that kind of thing all the time when I was a slumlord."

"Ghosts can't go through doors, stupid. They're not fire!"

"You can all hang out in your suspended humiliation and think about what you learned today. One, don't screw with me. Two, invite me to your crap."

"Did you know that in ancient Greece, it was considered an honor to invite a person my age to a space convention?"

"I had a couple of island girls over, one of them must have slipped me a mickey."

"I was never one to hold a grudge. My father held grudges, I'll always hate him for that."

"When we seek to destroy others, we often hurt ourselves, because it's the self that wants to be destroyed."

"We're all kind of crazytown bananapants."

"I'm confused... When do we get our ice cream?"

"What are you doing in an apartment above Dildopolis? And when did they open a second location?"

"You gain levels, and at a certain point you actually CAN eat a ghost."

"Nice going, tweedledumb and ever tweedlerdumb!"

"Will someone please call all the ambulances?"

"You never lived anywhere! You're a weapon designed for sex. You only THINK you lived in New York because I implanted your memories."

"Did you know there's an island where you can hunt people?"

"Do you want to be the schmuck who apologizes right before the world ends?"

"You're also, quite frankly, a very weird-looking man. I don't know you, but I just don't trust you. And I don't think I could grow to like you."

"Tell me how to get this laid back, or I'll kill your families!"

SHIRLEY BENNETT

"Usually, I walk out on a bad movie, but this sounds collegy."

"Being a virgin in this day and age is something to be proud of. You're like a unicorn."

"I took this boy all the way to tinkletown!"

"Kind people are always kind, not just when it's easy."

"Alright! You got me. I'm a bad mother. But at least I let my kids be kids."

"I'll make your ass sense!"

"Yeah, you’re both so different. Skinny bitches.”

“The sea may be cold and unforgiving, but I’m not.”

“The word he’s looking for is ‘~sassy~!’... He better pray he don’t find it.”

BRITTA PERRY

"Knock, knock. Who's there? Cancer. Oh good, come on in, I thought it was [NAME]!"

"So what you call insanity, we call solidarity!"

"If I wanted to wait on a rich man hand and foot, I would have gone to Dubai with that sheik I met at Trader Joe's."

"Did you all hit your heads on each other's heads?"

"Do they even have to talk? They could just touch tentacles and download."

"You told me a hawk stole them! You exploited me and made me believe in a slightly more magical world!"

We know that he hates money. Or loves it. Or doesn't care about money and hates butts. Or loves them."

"Pizza, pizza, go in tummy, me so hungee, me so hungee!"

"We do need the money. The biology department's been dissecting the same dead pig for ten years."

"If we get this money, we can buy 100 pigs and make everybody happy."

"A lifetime of disappointment has given me douche-ray vision."

"I know the stakes aren't really that high, but somehow that just makes it scarier."

"Left unattended I will do him like a crossword."

"The perfect blow-off class: a class that doesn't exist."

"Blaming a bridge collapse on a school is like blaming owls for why I suck at analogies."

"You are so emotionally closed off in bed to the point that one time I didn't come up because I couldn't find good enough parking."

"I know what a metaphor is! It's like a thought with another thought's hat on."

"I am not a whore, and not that I've done the math, but if I were, I'd be the super classy kind who gets flown to Dubai to stay in an underwater hotel."

DEAN PELTON

"Come on I'm dean, and my hands are so clean. At this moment, I am stapling~!"

"Everyone wins. Except [NAME]. But, you know, not everyone can win."

"Sweet deans."

"I had no idea alcohol makes people horny. Makes me sleepy."

"Frankly, my dear, I don't give a dean!"

"Oh, [NAME]'s in this?"

"I have always dreamt of playing charades with you, [NAME]. Just not like this. And not on dry land."

"Some people said he hid his money using a portal to another dimension. Those people were on LSD. Everyone else said that he had a secret vault in his office."

"Would that this hoodie were a time hoodie!"

"My god, what kind of labyrinth have you created? Certainly not the magic kind with puppets and macho rock stars."

"According to dean law, I must now give her my amulet."

"After you left, it was closed for sentimental reasons. And also asbestos reasons."

"I'm here, stuck in the body of a man who could be Gollum, so yeah, I'd say it's half past suck."

"I just heard from the Guiness rep. He's not coming. He's been fired in what he described as the world's biggest mistake."

"And to think I let him captain my magic carpet in my dream last night."

"I've been told we need a little baby quarantine until the army gets here."

"I didn't think more than one person would answer the ad. Yes, dream coming true!"

"Oh that's a possum, once you spend some time with them you'll see they're just big gentle rats."

BEN CHANG

"I ate my twin in utero."

"Fire can't go through doors, stupid. It's not a ghost."

"Shut your pompous vortex of overlapping fangs!"

"Boop! Boop! My bullcrap meter is going crazy!"

"Let me rest gently on your pecs."

"Hey! Those guys in there told me that you're the one that died in a fire and you're a ghost!"

"Thank you, sir. You won't regret this unless I rise up against you."

"Does anyone have an alliance I can join? I'm really loyal."

"My nephew Jim was born on the treadmill at Bally Total Fitness; 20% incline."

"I can answer both of those questions by returning your driver's license."

"So I did what any man would do. I faked my way into a job teaching Spanish at a community college using phrases from Sesame Street."

IAN DUNCAN

"It's either you, or me. And I'm ME."

"You stay back, [NAME]! I'm not afraid to push a girl into make-believe lava!"

"So... what is anthropology? Seriously, does anyone know?"

"You, in the boobs!"

"This is why the English never win any sports, because everyone else cheats!"

"Damn you, you outlying piece of datum!"

"Sorry I'm late. The sidewalk is more comfortable than it looks."

"So we can afford to create a new model of weaponized vehicle once a week, but we basically get minimum wage to risk our lives?"

"Good morning. How is student life, my dry-witted friend?"

"I'm sorry, do you mind if we have this conversation in a room with less balls?"

BUZZ HICKEY

"There are two things I don't do well--apologies and drawing duck bills."

"If I come over there, there are gonna be two sounds. Me hitting you... twice."

"Welcome to the labyrinth kid, except there aren't any puppets or bisexual rockstars down here."

"I could use the prize money. My son's getting gay married, and the flowers alone, you have no idea."

"I'm gonna say this as fast as I can - we can't afford to bury Dad with the rest of the family."

"Millimeter don't make no difference. Bullets just kinda kill you."

"Oh no, someone showed [NAME] a sandwich and now we're all traveling through time!"

"Publishers are INTERESTED!"

"I was in the storm drains of the Black River Ripper, I have seen human heads seen used for things other than heads! So you best not be calling ME a monster!"

"I've seen insurance appraisers bleed… their blood's different... Darker."

"Nobody's gonna pick on a guy on his birthday."

"I fought for this country. Now I know you don't get to choose which parts you fight for, but…"

FRANKIE DART

"Oh God no, I never hope. Hope is pouting in advance. Hope is faith's richer, bitchier sister."

"My life results tripled the year I gave up hope and every game on my phone that had anything to do with farming."

"I found the smell. Someone filed a taco."

"We do have a situation here, so we will make this our situation room."

"Nowhere else but my car? Do you know how big the planet is!?"

"Everyone here is a fart-- A LIVING FART, from the butt of a LESSER GOD!"

"You built a bar. In a school. There was LUMBER involved!"

"All right. This is the first I've heard that I'm a character on a show. I'm excited to be one, but I agree, I'll be a boring one."

"Quirks are not my strong suit, results are. I love quirky people. I come from a big family of people who are literally insane. I moved down here to take care of one of them."

"But I myself am exceptionally boring, and I am quite proud to be that way, because it allows me to help the less boring people turn quirks into results."

"Are you…? I don't know how to… I have a rule about being constructive so I can't ask any questions right now, because all of the questions that I have right now are rhetorical and end with the word 'idiot'. Do you know what rhetorical…? Of course you don't, you are an idiot. I'm sorry! I'm so sorry! You are so stupid and you have no idea, you are the only one who has no idea, because guess why? Don't answer that, you'll get it wrong. Also don't, you are just dumb little man who tries to destroy this place every minute. I am sorry! I'm so sorry! Oh it's ok! I mean, it's not ok, shh. Oh stupid, so stupid… such a dummy."

ELROY PATASHNIK

"They took my snake and they turned it into a plumber. They made the eggs into barrels. The pine tree they made into a gorilla but I recognize my design. Donkey Kong my ass! That's Construction Snake."

"I'm pretty handy with technology. I'm assuming it's still the same, smaller holes, more bytes. Now what are we up to now, mega?"

"Kid, animals have been murdering each other for 3 billion years. Birds have had their 15 million in the spotlight. The same as lizards and plants and they all just use it to murder, eat, screw and not invent Wi-Fi."

"I remember when candy bars were 50 cents. If someone said, hey, I just joined Mensa. Or I consider myself a postmodern this or that, you could say yeah, that and 50 cents could get you a candy bar, or that and a quarter could get you a phone call. It was easy to be unimpressed back then. I mean it was, literally, cheaper.”

"They did it, those bastards. They finally did it.”

"I WILL DRIVE MY HOUSE OFF A CLIFF!"

“I’m making a game about lady time travelers!”

"Why would a monkey fight a plumber?!"

"“The only solace I’m taking is that all of you are not rushing to unplug your phones right now.”

"Point at me and I'll eat it, I'll bite your finger off and I'll eat it"

"There's a bright side to this: Most conventional weapons don't require electricity."

MISC.

"Only when we stop stopping our lives, can we begin to start starting them."

"I can't believe I spent ten bucks on this! I don't know any of these people!"

"A little trick for achieving the proper competitive mindset: I always envision my opponent having aggressive sex with my mother."

"Oh you are so on that things have now become VERY MUCH like Donkey Kong."

"I fear a political career could shine a negative light on my drug dealing."

#RP Memes #Sentence Starters #Ask Meme

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xxacidicgoddessxx · 1 year

Text

Redesigning creepypasta characters

Jeff the Killer

Backstory version based on Banningk1979

BASIC INFORMATION

Name: Jeffery Woods

Nickname(s): Jeff

Age: 19

Alignment: Chaotic Evil

Height: 5’7 (170 cm)

Gender: Male

Sexuality: Painfully straight

Species: Human

Status: Alive

Race: Caucasian

APPEARANCE

Skin color: Pale, white

Eye color: Blind left eye, green right eye

Hair color: Black

Hair style: Short, greasy

Facial hair: -

Facial markings: Burn marks on the left side of his face (of which will gradually heal)

Piercings: -

Outfit(s): Black jacket, blue jeans, white shoes

Accessories: -

BACKGROUND

Jeffery Woods grew up in a family that only cared about appearances. He and his brother Liu were brands that gave name to their family

Their parents only cared about getting on other people's good sides, but when it came down to it - they were snakes. If a coworker's son was taking boxing lessons, Jeff had to take boxing lessons to prove their family was superior

In the grand scheme of things, that's all Jeff and Liu were — show-dogs. They were strangers in their own home when they weren't "contributing" to something

Liu was down right attention starved and quickly became a people pleaser, but at the core of it all he was just as frustrated as Jeff

Both of them knew when to be civil when necessary out of convenience, neither of them liked fighting

At least at the time, that is

Jeff's frustration coiled around him, tainting him, twisting at his insides. At times, fighting seemed like the only way he could communicate in a world where everyone lies to get what they want

Eventually, fighting became a source of pleasure. He found it cathartic and loved the rush it gave him to be in control. When it's only you left to protect yourself, fighting is all you can do

Some people say that when someone goes insane they snap - but that's not the case

From day one society ingrains the value of fighting into people, and when people listen, they love to look the other way

Jeff's not a monster, he's a fighter

That's what society made him to be, and if they can't take the heat, well, who's to say anyone's surprised

It was when Jeff realized nothing was going to give that he took it into his own hands. He got rid of the threat his parents posed, got rid of that damn corrupted cop and that smarmy group of kids

He can't believe he actually felt sorry for them at first. There's no use in sympathizing with the weak if you want to survive

He abandoned his old life, abandoned Liu, and left

PERSONALITY

Jeff has a big mouth on him

Don't get me wrong, as I said: he was raised to be civil when it counted, and he knows how to recognize when the odds are stacked against him, but that doesn't mean he doesn't have a short fuse

Back when he had Liu, he had a reason to hold back. Now that he's got no one to reprimand him for his actions, there's really no reason why he can't say or do whatever the fuck he wants

He doesn't like change and hates relying on other people. People can be unpredictable, and when it comes down to it, the only person you can trust is yourself

He quickly learned to be observant, learned to read other people's body language. In a house full of egg shells, one has to learn

He might say he's not a sadistic person, but he 100% is

He was quick to generalize pleasure with frustration, which is in part why he came to love fighting

Frustration was a promise tied to the anticipation of a fight, and fighting meant that he could convey what he felt

He finds a twisted sense of pleasure when people beg. His favorite part of killing is when people beg, it shows that they know where their place is – which just so happens to be beneath him

He hates this part of himself mainly because it reminds him of his parents, but it's the one thing he'd agree with them on

All in all, proving that people are beneath him is another one of his defense mechanisms in proving he is still in control

He just doesn't see the point in trying to persuade someone into seeing him as who he really is

People love to look down on anyone as if they're greater

With that said: it's best to avoid showing fear towards him – it will give him incentive to hurt you

Oh, and never let him see you act weak

Jeff is a manipulator through and through

What he does isn't because he wants to, it's always going to be someone else's fault for making him do the things he does

… Which means he’s also highly hypocritical

BEHAVIOR

Normal mood: Calm, “civil”, has an undeniable edge, perceptive

Temper: Quick to become frustrated, the poster child of “Gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss”

Discipline: Will try to be diplomatic, but having grown up where fighting was the only means of communicating, he becomes tense and ready for a fight whenever his views are put into question

Strengths: Hand-to-hand combat, enhanced durability

Weaknesses: Blind in one eye

Drives: Seeks to “save the weak” from a cruel society

Fears: Commitment

Likes: Killing, looking at the stars

Dislikes: Not being in control of a situation, cops

Triggers: Anyone who looks like Liu

Inspirations: His own convictions

Habits: Scratching the scarred side of his face

OTHER

Family: Shelia and Matt Woods (parents - deceased), Liu (brother - alive)

Friends: -

Enemies: -

Love interests: -

Hobbies: -

Talents: Whittling

Occupation: Killing

Weapon: Knives

Powers: -

Kill style: Stabbing, strangulation

#creepypasta #creepypasta jtk #jeff the killer #jeffery woods #creepypasta redesign #creepypasta rewrite #revamp #roleplay #rp #slenderverse #creepypasta rp

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house-of-laminations · 2 years

Note

Tbh we always talk about the more eldritch side of the obey me cast, but yknow what would be nice? Seeing these old grandpas get so shocked at how humans work now.

I don't really think demons have a proper concept of evolution. Maybe its more of a power up? But they certainly don't evolve like how humans would. It'd be funny to see some of them get shocked to learn that we didn't exactly look like this before. Of course some of em may know before, but other demons who just think of humans as food and nothing more would.

Idk its just funny to see a demon having a whole crisis because how tf did we go from that to that?

Anon not only is this hilarious to think about, especially when you consider the differences between human and demon biologies, but it's absolutely insane to imagine these ancient know-it-alls either just forgetting it or like. completely missing humans evolving. kinda like MC: i know as a human i think my species is kinda important but how do you MISS that? Brothers: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ so I wrote that. I hope you dont mind.

no cws, but there's a nod to dialuci, which could also be very easily read as a reckless MC making a joke at Lucifer's expense. 5.5k words again, babes.

Evolutionary Biology 101 with Prof. MC (or: how the demons missed the emergence of Homo sapiens sapiens only for MC to educate them)

Mammon

Mammon was created some time before Cambrian Explosion - though don't ask him what year, no one was keeping track of things like that back then.

The general goings-on of heaven didn't interest him so much, so Lucifer would often give him the more fun, creative projects to occupy his time.

He didn't pay much attention to humans either, not until Beel, Belphie, and Lilith started expressing an interest in them - and by then human development had progressed to the use of tools and currency - completely missing their initial emergence.

"Well this is a waste of time! There's nothin' shiny here at all," complains Mammon.

"You didn't have to come with me," you say, for what feels like the hundredth time.

In hindsight, it probably wasn't the smartest idea ever to bring the Avatar of Greed along with you while you visit the museum. Solomon had wanted you to pick up something from an acquaintance of his, and that acquaintance happened to be one of the research associates tied to the place. Your only saving grace has been the fact this is the Natural History Museum - still full of valuable artifacts, but less immediately obvious or eye catching. You wouldn't know what to do with Mammon in a place like the British Museum.

Or actually. On second thoughts... maybe you should take him there. He'd be right at home.

You leave the demon somewhere in near the entrance with a firm suggestion (though not an order) to stay put. The meeting is short and to the point, and you leave the office with an ancient scroll in hand.

Mammon is not where you left him when you return.

With a sigh, you find yourself a map of museum exhibits, resolving to find him by process of elimination. Maybe he's by some of the valuables displays - early tools, jewelry, and pottery could potentially snag his interest.

Except he's not where you expect him to be at all.

You find Mammon in one of the new exhibits - Roots of Australiana.

"I made that one," he says, pointing. You follow the line his finger makes and you can't help but feel the surge of fond exasperation when your eyes land on the taxidermy creature.

"Are you telling me you made the platypus?"

"Yup, all the handiwork of the Great Mammon!" he says, pride in his voice and the way he puffs out his chest. "Michael hated it but Lucifer loved it."

The affection you feel for this demon is immeasurable. You laugh, grabbing onto his arm and hugging him close, just to see that beautiful red blush take over his features. You don't let yourself be shocked by the fact that apparently Mammon was responsible for the creation of one of the weirdest creatures known to mankind. It makes a startling amount of sense.

You spend the next few hours in just that one exhibit, pointing at different animals and asking about their origins. Mammon doesn't know the answer to all of the questions you ask, but you do get a glimpse into what sort of life he maybe had before the Fall.

"Oh yeah! Jellyfish! Levi wasn't super interested in makin' anything but we all had to contribute something. He got his out of the way real early on too."

"Lucifer says he made the cassowary, but Satan swears up an' down that it was him drivin' at the time."

"Asmo, Beel, an' I worked together on Kangaroos. Or rather - I made kangaroos but Asmo didn't think they were 'cute' enough so he made wallabies. Beel was just a kid back then but he loved 'em so much he wanted to show Belphie and Lilith, so he made Rock-Wallabies. Small enough that he could pick 'em up and carry 'em in his lil' baby hands."

Eventually you get to the end of the exhibit, where there there's a display of recreations of the neolithic pre-human variations of the indigenous peoples. There's even an actual skull just sitting there in the open, beyond the rope boundary. Surprisingly, Mammon has something to say about this too.

"Lucifer, Simeon, an' a few of the other seraphim helped make those. I dunno why it took a bunch of them though considerin' there are none left around today. Too many cooks, I wonder?"

You freeze.

"Mammon," you start, still formulating your thoughts, "do you know what this is?"

He cocks his head, gaze flitting between you and the display. "It's jus' a monkey, isn't it? Not one of the cute ones though."

"No..." you say slowly, only because you yourself are kind of perplexed by this strange gap in his knowledge, "Well. Yes, kind of a monkey. But a monkey that eventually evolved into the human race."

There's a moment of silence as Mammon stares at you.

"You're shittin' me, MC," he finally says.

"I wouldn't lie to you about this," you say, even though you would in any other circumstance. Winding Mammon (or really, any of the brothers) up has become a personal past-time. "That right there is one of the protohumans. Paranthropus boisei if that plaque is to be believed."

Mammon looks so confused and it's hard not to giggle a little at his wide eyes.

But then you see his arm move and -

"Wait, Mammon-"

It's too late. Mammon has already reached inside the exhibit to grab hold of the skull. Alarms start blaring but he ignores it - probably doesn't even register to him. Instead, he's holding up the skull to be level with your own head.

You only just hold back from making an Alas, dear Yorrick joke.

"Nah, I don' see it. Where'd the fangs go? Your teeth so little compared to these chompers." he says, while fiddling with the admittedly ginormous teeth inside the skull.

You pull on his arm to try and get him to drop the skull before anyone sees, but he doesn't budge. "Please, Mammon. I'll tell you if you just put. The skull. Down."

You punctuate each word with more fruitless tugs at his arm, which prompts him to raise it higher to try and get the skull out of your reach. Security has now run into the room, and they're all trying to ask him the same thing - put the skull down and come with them.

Mammon snorts, narrowing his eyes. "Pesky humans," he grumbles, before wrapping his free arm around you.

You're not quite sure what happens next. You think there's a flash of wing, the touch of cool leather, but it's like your brain just doesn't know how to translate what your body is seeing, hearing, and feeling.

When the world starts making sense again, you have to blink a few times to get your eyes adjusted to bright sunlight. You can hear running water, and in front of you a platypus is lounging in the reeds of a small creek.

Mammon is still holding that skull.

"Alright, now that we're alone, you can start explainin' things," he says.

This is just too bizarre. You sigh. So much for getting Solomon's scroll back to him before sundown. Especially now that it seems Mammon has taken you entire continents away.

In for a penny...

"Is listening to me explain evolutionary biology to you really what you want to do now we're alone in the middle of nowhere?"

There's a splashing sound as the skull is thrown into the creek. You can't find it in you to care. Especially not when strong arms wrap around you and everything becomes Mammon.

Leviathan

Leviathan was created some million years before the Triassic era. He grew up at the same time the life in the ocean was starting to grow teeth.

He was the brother to spend the most time on Earth - but not on land. His presence in the deepest depths in the ocean was perhaps one of the reasons for their eventual gargantuan size. And as the creatures grew in response to this threat, Leviathan grew with them.

Really, humans only started being interesting when they learned to tell stories with nuance. His brothers like to joke it was the advent of anime and manga, but really, Levi secretly loved the puppetry of early civilizations too.

But by then, it was too late. He'd spent all that time down in the ocean, only to miss man's precursors crawling from the waves.

You're mentally patting yourself on the back for the absolutely brilliant idea to bring Levi to a human aquarium when he stops suddenly beside you.

It's not the first time that's happened during the day - quite often some scaly creature will attract Levi's attention and he'll be frozen staring at it for a bit. If you didn't know better you'd say he was trying to mentally communicate with the fish. You're happy to listen to his long rants and tangents after about that particular species or maybe a fun story he has about some of his oceanic trips. Normally the shifting blue ambiance of the aquarium lighting makes people look spooky, otherworldy. On Levi, it makes him look alive.

What seems to have stopped him this time is the absolutely enormous jawbone of what the plaque tells you is a Megalodon.

"It was a baby," he sniffs.

You grab onto his hand, pushing down the existential terror that anecdote brings up in you. Whatever this jaw belonged to could swallow you whole without realizing, and that's baby sized?

"There, there. At least it's swimming happily in the fishy afterlife with the rest of its species," you try to console.

"Not all of them," he grumbles sulkily.

That makes you freeze. You're staring up at the fossilized jawbone, contemplating the implications of that comment long enough for Levi to wander off on his own.

"MC," Levi calls to you, though you can't say for sure how much time has passed, "what do they mean by 'all life started in the ocean'?"

Once with Mammon was chance.

Twice with Levi - it can't be coincidence.

Or rather, shouldn't be.

"Exactly what it says," you say rather blithely. You should not have to explain this to beings who were definitely alive back then. "All life, including the reptiles, mammals, and even humans, started off as some variation of sea life."

"Oh, so you have gills? Why didn't you say so MC, I could've taken you taken out to visit Lotan ages ago if I'd known-"

"Levi, I don't have gills," you interrupt. "I have lungs. We've been over this."

He screws up his nose. "Seems like a bit of a downgrade, to me. Think about all the cool things you're missing out on because you don't have gills!"

"Missing?" you ask incredulously, "sure, we're coming back to the giant deep sea life that apparently isn't dead in a sec, but how can you miss all of human evolution?"

He blinks at you slowly.

"It's not like the land creatures were doing anything interesting."

You splutter. "Not doing anything inter- Levi they were evolving into humans. They were fighting and eating each other to distill the dominant species!"

He shrugs.

"Plesiosaurs did that too. If you wanted to see some really vicious fighting, you could always count on the Vampyromorphs."

"I'm sorry the what?"

Levi sighs like you were put on this earth just to test him. In your defense, you kind of were, a little bit. You sling an arm around his shoulders to bring him close. You're in this together, after all.

You don't hide your blush when he confidently puts an arm around your waist in return, hand settling on your hip. He uses it to steer you towards the Squid Tank.

"C'mon MC, your normie side is showing. Vam-pyro-morph. Giant squids with slightly cannibalistic tendencies. Ticklish underneath the tentacles and the teeth," he says, like that explains anything.

Sketched onto the plaque beside the tank is one of the early vampire squid precursors. It's the most terrifying thing you have ever seen.

Speaking of terrifying, that reminds you -

"Levi- hey. Levi, please, what did you mean megalodon aren't extinct-"

Satan & Asmodeus

Asmodeus was created sometime around the late Jurassic era. This was way before the modern variations of the Homo sapiens species, but a few of their precursors were mulling around.

That wasn't to say they were doing anything particularly interesting. Instead, Asmo was more taken with the potential colors of avian feathers. He was trying to campaign for more variation by aggressively making more wild and wonderful plumage.

Satan, perhaps, has the best defense in that he didn't exist as an independent entity until sometime around when humans invented agriculture. He may have had flashes of awareness within Lucifer, but it was very rarely during anything to do with the mortal races.

You, Satan, and Asmo had agreed to study for your next Devildom Law exam together in the House's library. Studying together was normally a thing you and Satan would do anyway, but Asmo had been falling behind somewhat in your last exams, and Lucifer was starting to get snippy about it. You suggested Asmo should join you and Satan, on the basis that the current unit is on human cultural developments, and you can teach by example.

Asmo was especially enthusiastic about that.

Surprisingly, he was a more effective study partner than, say, Mammon. The three of you had been managing to read quietly together for just over an hour. Your hand had drifted unconsciously into Asmo's hair, while Satan let his tail wrap around your ankle.

"I didn't realize humans had multiple forms too!"

Asmo's voice breaks the tranquility of the library, and you look up from your notes. Satan leans over Asmo's shoulder and hums a little in surprise.

You suddenly have a lap full of the Avatar of Lust as Asmo crowds into your space. He's got a book in hand - one on the history and development of human cultures. It's turned to a page on the origins of humanity, and it even contains one of those stereotypical diagrams you'd associate with the progression of evolution - from fish to primate to man.

"What-" you start, but Satan's already latched onto this subject like a cat with its prey.

"It makes sense - your current form is quite dexterous and good for persistance hunting, but it doesn't provide much in terms of raw power," he's saying, and what?

"Though it seems the cranial size and cognitive capacity of your current form is the most advanced - is that to make quick decisions and judgements?"

"You don't have to keep your defenses up with us - surely you know that we'll love you no matter what you look like," Asmo croons, twining your fingers together.

"Don't you trust us, MC?" asks Satan and damn him for being so soft.

"Wait, guys, you don't think..." you start but then trail off. After Mammon and Levi, maybe you shouldn't assume the knowledge of these dumbasses demons.

"Think what, MC?" Satan asks.

You can't help the laugh that escapes you.

"Humans don't have multiple forms, at least that I'm aware of. That's a diagram of human evolution," you explain.

It doesn't seem to clear anything up. They're both still staring at you, waiting.

"Humans didn't always start off with opposable thumbs. In fact, we actually started in the ocean as weak little microbes," you say, wishing you paid more attention in high school bio. "We eventually grew lungs and feet and all the other stuff until we landed on version I am today."

"Oh," says Asmo, and it's actually a bit of a surprise that he's the first of the two to get it.

"Kind of like how Satan started off as a parasitic feeling of righteous anger, then became a ball of miasmic spite before figuring out the whole physical shape thing?"

Or not.

"Hey, I was not a parasite-" Satan scowls but you cut him off before he could get truly worked up.

"No, that's more like human childhood development-" you stop yourself when you see their looks of confusion. Right. Basics. "Anyway. Human evolution happened over millions of years. What you see before you now is the result of thousands of generations combining to produce the most viable, strongest traits for survival."

"Oh!" says Asmo, and not again. "Like dogs!"

You go to refute that too, but then you pause. Technically all the different shapes and sizes dogs come in are the result of generations of selective breeding. Some have survived and some have died off.

"Kind of," you finally settle on.

Satan scowls. "You're not like a dog, MC. You're different to other humans, right?"

You sigh, resolving yourself to an afternoon of explain the theories of evolutionary taxonomy, genetics, and survival of the fittest.

To two of the most powerful beings in existence.

Great. So much for date night.

Beelzebub & Belphegor

Beelzebub and Belphegor (and Lilith) all had a fascination with humans and human cultures.

That doesn't mean they were particularly aware of their origins. After all, they had only been created towards the late Miocene era. They were children as the protohumans were taking their first steps.

To say the twins and Lilith grew up as humanity grew up wouldn't be incorrect. They were somewhat sheltered, though, from the worst of it.

You had promised this would be a quick trip to the university's library. You still have your student access, which grants you document delivery privileges - something both Lucifer and Solomon take advantage of regularly. Normally the library could send you a digital copy of your requested book, chapter, or paper, but in this case you had to go in and pick up a physical copy. Belphie and Beel had offered to accompany you for the trip, and in return you offered to get them a human world lunch - your treat.

However, you weren't banking on encountering one of your more detestable peers. You and he had never gotten along - not even since your undergrad days. He catches sight of you before you could turn and leave, and you were forced into a 'polite' game of catch-up.

The conversation starts and ends with pointed barbs and unwarranted bragging on both sides. Occasionally his eyes will flick towards Beel and Belphie at your back, both impatiently waiting for this to be over like kids waiting for their parent to stop catching up with an old friend in the shopping centre. Unfortunately it all devolves into something just shy of a screaming match when he decides to bring the twins into it, referring to them obliquely - insulting them in that underhanded way that conceited academics fling around their intelligence. There's something frantic about it, though.

He decides to take his leave when you start garnering the attention of other students.

"Right, well, when you're done associating with Neanderthals be sure to give me a call. I need that book once you're done with it."

"I would, but that lead pole stuck up your ass would probably block my call anyway," you sneer as he leaves, determined not to give him the last word.

A strong arm wraps around your waist, stopping you from going after that scholarship stealing prick by keeping you held against Beel's chest.

"I don't get why he made you so mad," grumbles Belphie.

"You mean besides sniping the scholarship and supervisory team I was gunning for during my year away?" you take a deep breath, forcing yourself to calm down. This probably doesn't mean much to them anyway. "He shouldn't have called you that."

"Called us what?" Beel asks, still not letting you go.

You turn in his hold, tilting your head. "He called you Neanderthals. Which is such a childish insu-"

"What's a neanderthal?" asks Belphie, coming up on Beel's other side to lean against you heavily. You're not sure whether it's his inherent laziness or his desire to constantly be close to you, but you appreciate it regardless.

You sigh. By now you've realized that for whatever reason, these ancient entities who predate humanity know nothing about how your species emerged.

You grab both of their hands in your own, tugging at Beel softly to get him to release you. He does, and you walk them towards the display at the entrance of the Anthropology library. There's a large, old diagram in a simple frame that feels incongruous to the ultra-modern aesthetic the rest of the library seems to have.

The picture depicts somewhat of a lineage of human species - with branching taxonomies to show some of the related Homo Sapiens species before your own wiped them out. You point to one of the closest humanoid figures - it's proportions vaguely similar to your own, but the arms and hands are too large, the skull too long.

"That's a neanderthal. They were a possible early prototype of humans," you say, and it's somewhat amusing to see the identical expressions of confusion direct themselves from you to the image.

Beel hums. "I still don't get it. Why did it make you so mad?"

You sigh. "The neanderthals were wiped out by the early Homo sapiens sapiens - my species. Well. Wiped out, bred out, there's still some contention. Supposedly their cognition wasn't advanced as ours, so by using it as an insult, he was calling you stupid, boorish, and outdated."

"I'll show him stupid and boorish," mutters Belphie, his human-looking form flickering slightly around the edges.

And no, as tempting as it is, you probably shouldn't let the demon loose on that human annoyance. You scramble to come up with something to distract Belphie, but all you can really focus on is the flickering.

Hmm.

"Neanderthals weren't the only human-like species people think were wiped out. There's some speculation that humans developed a sense of the uncanny valley because there were other species around that came close to threatening us," you start, tightening your grip on Belphies hand. You re-grab Beel's, now trying to lead them out of the building.

You continue. "Humans have this sense that basically freaks us out when we see something that looks, sounds, and moves like a human, but isn't quite right. It could've also developed as a way to weed out undesirable conditions or illnesses as humanity was evolving."

You can see your words starting to get through to Belphie, and wide eyes blink at you slowly. You can tell Beel is also invested, in the way he's stopped trying to tug you over in the direction of the vending machines.

"But I have another theory."

Belphie is very clearly interested now, but it's Beel who asks "what's your theory?"

"I think that there is another species - one stronger and faster and better at hiding itself - that humans are below in the food chain. All we can do is keep an eye out for them, because we sure as hell aren't going to be able to fight them off."

"I'd fight them for you, MC," says Beel, and he's sweet. But you can also tell that he's realized where you've been leading the conversation.

"What's the point of this all, MC?" asks Belphie and damn it you thought you managed to distract him. His shape is still flickering threateningly.

"I'm talking about demons, Belphie. You guys eat human souls as some kind of tasty snack. Humans can't fight back so we developed an ability to be scared so we could run away. That asshole back there was probably puffing up his feathers because he was terrified of you."

Finally, finally, that seems to appease Belphie. A self-satisfied grin crosses his face, and he leans further into you.

There's a loud growl, breaking the fragile peace. Beel doesn't even bother trying to look embarrassed.

"Yes, we can get food now. C'mere," you say before he can even ask, and begin to drag them anew.

A thrill shoots up your spine when you realize they let you lead them, these apex predators who are designed to consume you.

Lucifer & Diavolo

Unlike his brothers, Lucifer wasn't unobservant throughout prehistoric times. In fact he, Simeon, Michael, and a few other siblings were given the responsibility to push evolution in the right direction.

That final step between Homo Heidelbergensis and Homo Sapiens took its toll on all of them, and so Lucifer gave himself permission to stop giving a fuck about the mortal fleshbags to focus more on his family.

Perhaps this is why he didn't quite have the same curiosity about human culture that his siblings did - it was so much work getting them to that point that all he can think of was the long hours.

Diavolo himself had been born at some point in very early human history but he's always had a fascination with humans and where they came from - compounded when he found out the role Lucifer himself played in their creation.

But that doesn't mean they're both without some gaps in their knowledge (in some very important places)....

"Here, hold this."

This is the only warning you get before the squirming baby is deposited in your arms.

The child belongs to one of your friends from before college - before RAD. Your friend had brought it along for one of your admittedly rare catch-ups because she couldn't find a sitter, sorry! You watch helplessly as she leaves your table to head towards the bathrooms.

You stare at the baby.

It babbles back at you.

"MC?" a familiar voice calls.

You and the baby both look up at the same time with identical dumbfounded expressions.

Approaching your table is two tall figures, both wearing long and expensive looking overcoats. The one in red is grinning sunnily, while his companion in blue is screwing up his nose, making his glasses skew on his face. Diavolo and Lucifer take seats at your table, despite the fact there are plenty of empty places around the cafe.

"Please don't tell me you've picked up a pet, MC," Lucifer says with distaste, "Despite what you may hope, it won't teach my brothers responsibility."

One day you will teach this demon manners. This is not the way to greet someone you run into while they're on holiday.

"It's a baby," you say slowly, dragging out the syllables.

"Ooh a baby what?" Diavolo asks, and surely not.

"Something that's easier to train while young, I would hope?" Lucifer asks.

Well. Yes, but...

You squint at him. He stares back impassively, though you do notice the confusion in the way his eyebrows cock unevenly.

"A human baby!" you say incredulously.

Sure, your time in the Devildom was fraught with cultural misunderstandings, but come on. These are two of the most powerful beings in existence. Lucifer has been around since the beginning of time itself.

Diavolo pushes his face in close to the baby, and then you have to rear back as he turns to study you just as intently. Normally you wouldn't mind, but now is not the time or the place.

"It's so small, and squishy," he says.

"It's the weaker version of a human," Lucifer says, though he doesn't look as confident as his tone would have you believe him to be, "it likely needs more time to coalesce more energy."

"Guys," you say with exasperation, "it's a baby. It grows. Physically! And hopefully: mentally and emotionally. It doesn't shapeshift. It doesn't 'coalesce energy'. It just ages."

They're looking at you doubtfully. You really don't think it's that hard to grasp.

"Besides," you add, "this technically isn't even a human's weakest form."

"They get smaller?" Lucifer asks.

It's the first time you've seen him so freaked out.

"How?" Diavolo asks and no you are not going to explain this to him-

"I'm sorry - who are you?"

Sweet, saving grace. Maybe there really is a god looking down on you.

Your friend has returned. She looks apprehensive, though that may have something to do with the rather large, intimidating, obviously rich men huddling around you and her baby. Oh, right.

Your mind scrambles to come up with a good excuse.

"Oh! This is Luci...us," you start, and immediately panic when you realize you were about to use Lucifer's actual name. The demon in question shoots you a glare, but at this point in your relationship you've become immune.

"And this uh..."

Friend? Boss?

Actually. Fuck it. Time for revenge for almost forcing you to explain the birds and the bees to him. And all the other shit you've been through since waking up in the Devildom.

"This is his husband, Dia. They run the exchange program I told you about - the one I spent a year away for. They're actually thinking of adopting at the moment."

Immediately your friend's face brightens. "Oh?" she asks, "what age were you thinking?"

"Actually-" Lucifer starts, but you're not going to let him derail your Evil Plan™.

"Around the same age as yours," you interrupt.

This lights a fire in your friend's eyes, and immediately she starts her whole tirade anew about the lack of sleep and the burping and all the messes and the lack of sleep and the wonders of small humans forming their own consciousness and opinions and the lack of sleep and- well. Basically everything you had been unwittingly subjected to before you were interrupted by the demons.

Diavolo takes all the unwanted and unwarranted information with an enthusiasm that definitely helps play into the fiction you've set up. Beside him, Lucifer is smiling pleasantly, but when his gaze drifts to you and you meet his eyes -

v̴̥͠ȩ̶̃r̶̟̒t̵͚̍i̵͂ͅg̶̱̏o̶̤͠. you're at the edge of a precipice and you're not going to fall. you're i̷̳͝n̸̦̽s̴͔͐i̶͔͠g̴͉̏n̶̯̏i̵̮͑f̷̻̐ȉ̴̩c̴̛̞a̴̛͇n̴̜͠t̶̩́. it would be so easy to be crushed by this abyss-

you smile back just as congenially. Really. You'd think he'd remember that none of his glares work on you anymore. The baby in your arms squirms and holds its own pudgy little arms up towards the Avatar.

Huh. Interesting. That glare of his doesn't work on the kid either.

You're still forced to sit there politely while your friend rambles on about the wonders of human development and the joys of being a parent for another two hours. It's definitely worth it though - the picture of a small, red, wiggly baby being held at arm's length by the Avatar of Pride is one that will live in your memory for lifetimes to come.

Barbatos

Barbatos doesn't quite know when to attribute his creation to. It's never really mattered.

He wandered the Earth before the Fall, before humans. He watched that first creature crawl itself out of the mud. He watched as it crawled and stood and spoke.

He kept a close eye on this species - especially as they began to show intelligence. They created their own laws and measurements and perceptions of Time, which was cute, if a bit misguided.

In some of the early days, he let some of his true nature slip too close to the surface, and in return he was granted offerings of livestock and. Well. Live humans. Young ones. Too young.

There's warmth somewhere near your cheek as a cup of tea is placed down delicately beside where you had been resting on top of your assignments. You snort and a shiver goes through you as consciousness slowly filters back in.

At least there are worst ways to wake than with Barbatos' soft smile to greet you.

"Thank you," he says.

"For what?" you ask. You're still trying to wake up, and one of your sticky notes frees itself from your face and floats back down to the table you were napping working at. Admittedly, the smell of Barbatos' tea is doing wonders.

"For seeing to the education of my Master and his Lords. It wouldn't do for the future King of Hell and his council to be so ignorant in regards to their human subjects."

No way.

"You set me up," you hiss.

A gloved hand comes down on top of your head, and you put up a small token effort of resistance for a moment but no one can truly hold out against such soft head scratches.

"Perhaps," Barbatos says, and you're immediately reminded of why you associate him with snakes. "But it was a learning experience of your own, was it not?"

Thanks for the ask, Anon! 💛 I hope you don't mind the mess that spawned from it...

Back to masterlist | Eldritch Headcanons

#obey me #obey me fic #obey me swd #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me lucifer #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me belphegor #obey me beelzebub #obey me diavolo #i spent way too long researching what were period-accurate dinosaurs for Levi's part #bc i didnt want to be inaccurate in a fanfiction about theologically incorrect dateable demon boys #priorities #this is why you dont ask a grad student to write about something that can be researched and referenced #mammons section got out of hand but i blame erin for that #BABIES ARE WEIRD ERIN YOU CANT CHANGE MY MIND #is the infodumping to dia and lucifer based on my own experiences from one of my friends who has recently had a kid? you bet it is!!!#i talk to a real human #im a humanities researcher who started in medicine this woke something in me

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linawritestwst · 2 years

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avery glass (twst oc)

yayyy lina made a twst oc!! that's my boy.. THAT'S MY BOY..

okay so when i was thinking about which character i should use as an inspiration for this oc, i.. actually had no idea who i should choose. at first i thought "hey what if i just use one of my childhood disney faves" but then i remembered that all characters that i cared about back then were just. either disney princesses or fairies. yeah i was kinda basic.

and i wanted to go with something a little different because twst ocs that are based on those characters definitely exist already. so i went "what if. what if i just use AN OBJECT as an inspiration and not a character" because if i'm not wrong, epel is based on a poisoned apple from snow white, right? feel free to correct me though. but even if he's not, i just thought that it would be an interesting idea.

so here's my son and he's based on a magical rose from beauty and the beast! wow lina one rose boy wasn't enough for you

full name: avery glass (エイブリー・ガラス) (i had a hard time choosing his first name and just went with avery because i simply thought it sounds cool. his last name is a reference to glass that a rose from the movie was under.)

age: 17 y/o

gender: male

species: human

birthday: january 8

zodiac sign: capricorn

height: 174 cm

eye color: soft pink

hair color: dark pink

homeland: queendom of roses

family: mother, father, little sister

school: royal sword academy

dorm: *cries in not knowing anything about rsa* (also yes his magic pen is pink but i just. made it this color because his color scheme is mostly pink, it's not based on any dorm)

school year: second

occupation: student

club: gardening club. i don't even know if rsa has a club like that, but it has now because i said so.

best subject: alchemy

dominant hand: right

favorite food: hard candy (especially raspberry flavored)

least favorite food: gummy worms (his little sister put a real worm in his gummy worms bag once when he wasn't looking. this would be his villain origin story but he's a rsa student)

hobby: secretly reading romance novels, also taking care of flowers and plants

talent: candy making

unique magic: "the curse of beauty". avery can change any person's appearance so that it would show how truly beautiful they are on the inside. it doesn't only make beautiful people ugly if they're secretly cruel, it can also make people that are "ugly" by society's standards more beautiful if they're actually kind and caring. if avery uses his unique magic on a person that is already beautiful in many people's eyes and kind, their appearance won't change in any way. however, his magic can harm both him and the person that he used unique magic on, because he can't cancel the effect of "the curse of beauty" himself, the person can get their normal appearance back only if someone says to them that they love them and means it (platonically or romantically) or if someone like riddle with his unique magic intervenes. what's even worse, if that person stays with their new appearance for too long, avery will start getting all kinds of injuries such as scars, scratches, bruises, etc.

dislikes: people that are "too pretty" and loud people.

personality: avery sure looks like a cute and shy boy, but don't let his looks fool you, because this guy.. his personality doesn't fit his appearance at all. avery has a tongue that as sharp as rose's thorns and he WILL most likely make fun of you. in fact, he calls most people by nicknames just like floyd and rook, but he doesn't give someone a nickname to show his affection, they're supposed to offend people instead. he even has nicknames for nrc students, for example, he calls trey a "teeth-brushing freak" and he called cater a "magicam addict with a fake smile" once. he's also insanely proud of nicknames that he comes up with and he has a full list of them that's hanging on the wall in his room. avery hates people that are too pretty/beautiful/handsome, because he thinks that these people are self-centered and arrogant and they only care about their looks. but honestly, his hatred of them looks like he's just in deep denial most of the time, because he literally says things like "i hate your beautiful eyes and how soft your skin is and how pretty you look when you smile! i hate it!" his hobbies fit his looks much more than his personality: he's a member of the gardening club, he likes candy and making it and even though he says that he hates romance, he secretly reads romance novels and keeps them in his room. if he sees you finding them though.. yeah, you probably won't make it out alive. he even likes to play matchmaker and ship people that he thinks look good together. he most likely ships mc with someone (but mc will never know about it).

notable relationships:

he stated several times that he doesn't like neige because he's pretty and his personality is most likely fake, because no one can be that kind and that popular at the same time. he's totally not following neige on his secret account. neige meanwhile wants to learn more about avery and be friends with him.

avery is TERRIFIED of chenya because he reminds avery of his little sister who is a huge prankster. chenya finds avery's reactions interesting and fun, because pink-haired boy is trying to act so tough and cool but if he sees chenya he goes "NOPE NO NOT TODAY BYE"

avery is usually a victim of his little sister's pranks and even though he often says just how annoying his sister is, it's obvious that he cares about her and that he would do anything to protect her if anything bad happened to her.

his voice lines(quotes):

if you choose to hold his hand: "hey, if you stay behind, don't blame me, okay? it's your fault for being too slow!"

level up:

"why are we even doing this? i'm already strong enough!"

"fine, you can help me out, if you want to. just don't get in the way, okay?"

"i think i deserve a candy after this."

level up max:

"yay, we've finally did it! oh, um.. whatever, i didn't really need your help anyway."

episode level up:

"why do you keep hanging out with me?.. huh? you think i'm cute? uh.. is that, like, a compliment or something?"

magic level up:

"so this just means i can hit all of those good-looking liars even harder, right?"

limit break:

"okay, fine, i'll do what you want from me. but you absolutely have to pay me with candy after!"

groovy:

"i knew it, i really am better than all of them! and you think so too, right?.. please, tell me that you think so."

lesson lines (before lesson):

"come on, why should i listen to you? ugh, then promise me that you'll visit the gardening club after this! i want to show you something."

"here, i've got a whole bag of candy, it'll help me get through this."

"i don't need your help!.. but if you have subjects you struggle with, i might give you a hand just to show how smart i am."

lesson start:

"you better go with me then!"

lesson end:

"hey, i can't hear you saying "thank you for helping, avery!".. that's better."

battle start:

"watch me win and tell everyone how cool i am after i'm done."

battle win:

"oh you poor thing, here, have a candy!.. haha, you actually thought i'd give it to you?"

fun facts

avery's hatred of good-looking people is a reference to the fact that in "beauty and the beast" the enchantress offered a rose to a prince in exchange for shelter but he refused. he was punished and turned into a beast, so that he looked as ugly on the outside as he was on the inside. so yeah, avery thinks that all people that look beautiful are as arrogant as that prince.

his transparent hat (yes, that's my attempt at drawing transparent things) is supposed to represent the glass that rose from the movie was under.

avery actually tried to hide his freckles with make-up before but he changed his mind because otherwise he would be like those "fake people" that he so deeply hates.

many rsa students think that nrc would fit avery better.

avery knows heartslabyul students well due to some of them being from his homeland. riddle is the only nrc student that he has at least some respect for and he's the only person that avery doesn't call by a nickname. avery thinks that ace and deuce are too dumb to have a proper conversation with them. he's afraid of trey because avery eats.. quite a lot of candy every day and he said that he's thankful for not going to the same school as trey.

if you compliment his appearance, at first avery will be like "?? huh??", he's gonna be so confused and then he will just assume that you're calling him a selfish and a fake person. you can compliment other things though, like his skills or personality.

if he was a nrc student, he would be fine with being sorted to any dorm except pomefiore because.. for obvious reasons.

his unique magic is based on the beast's curse and the way to bring people back to normal is also based on the way of breaking the curse from the movie. avery getting injuries if the person is still under the influence of his magic is a reference to a rose from "beauty and the beast" losing petals.

even though avery reads so much romance, he's actually oblivious to flirting and he doesn't know when he's saying things that sound flirty. he can easily feed you candy when you're not expecting it or give you a flower that he grew himself and he will be like ".. what, some people think it's romantic?"

however, avery can get jealous easily and is kinda possessive, but he probably won't even realize that he's acting like this because he fell in love with someone.

avery tends to use his unique magic pretty often just to mess with people but he doesn't tell anyone about him getting injured after using it and he tries to hide it with his clothes. he really is ready to go THAT far just for a prank. it doesn't help that he's full of negative emotions and feelings when he's doing it, so.. *cough* overblot!avery *cough*

it takes a great amount of self-control for avery to not swear every single second. also judging looks from rsa students help.

#twisted wonderland #disney twisted wonderland #twst oc #twisted wonderland oc #lina's twst children

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nuclearnerves · 3 years

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INCOMING VAMPIRE AU THOUGHTS

Don't mind me I'm finally getting the ideas I had on this shit out so I can actually go forward with developing it as an AU. It's my usual mixup of fps protags, Gordon Guy and John, but I'm starting with Gordon as the Vampire and Guy as the Vampire Hunter.

absolute beast of a wall of text under the cut

What If Being A Vampire Literally Sucks All The Time Forever like chronic pain sucks. like THAT level of sucks. Like Here's what I was thinking of. Being a vampire isn't just "being alive forever but you need to drink human blood" It's like Oh man I have some lore you look at vampires and their main thing is that they're blood suckers right so lets start with a corpse dead body. cadaver. no longer with us. just some rotting meat. The brain needs oxygen as fuel. The blood supplies the oxygen through blood. The blood is pumped through the heart. The blood is made by your bone marrow. You die. Your heart stops beating Blood stops pumping Brain no longer has oxygen to think marrow stops making blood thats standard! Now, becoming undead, as a vampire, is a little more complicated. The long and short of it is: your body is FIGHTING ACTIVELY to be alive against all odds and wins every time (immortality), but it hurts the whole way

I have the gist of it. It's like. Your heart stops. By all means, you should be dead. but the magic kicks in, and you're still thinking. Your brain is still sending signals to your muscles to move. But using what oxygen to move? whats burning in you? You don't know but you know it's just enough to get to your next meal. So you ferociously eat something, and then find you can't swallow. You can't make saliva. You barely have the energy to chew, and once you DO get something in your stomach, it immediately comes back up. Why can't you feel your pulse? What's going on? You're out of options so you figure you might as well just lie down and die. You're too tired to keep going anyway. So you do, you lie down, and you close your eyes, and you quietly hope that death is as peaceful as sleep. You realize you've actually been moving around without breathing, which makes sense because you can barely flex your diaphragm for more than a shaky wheeze. How are you thinking with such little oxygen? But as you fade from consciousness, you can feel something in you, and it's so upset, it's crying, it's filled with grief, and you instantly can tell it's your skeleton. It's your bones. You're distraught down to your marrow. You're dying. You're dying! Your heart stopped and you have no more blood! You need blood! You need blood to move! To breathe! To think! You try to breath deep again for the voices in your bones, trying to comfort them, to sooth them with the repetitive motion in your lungs, trying to fill yourself with anything but grief, but they keep wailing. We make the blood, our creation, our child, what we put all of our work into is gone! gone! gone! We need it back! Anything! All of it! Find it! Bring it back to us! We're hungry! WE'RE HUNGRY!

and once you find yourself too exhausted to listen, to think, how badly you wish just to die already to cease hearing this wailing, you find your body moving without you. And it's hungry and it's searching and it's crawling on all fours and it misses its beautiful red life that made it feel so full before and it needs it back, and the next thing you know you're desperately grabbing anything with blood in it and shoving it in your mouth in a desperate attempt to sooth this cry for life, you don't want to die, you don't want to die, you worked so hard to keep up this body and craft it and LIVE with it and you're not going to go, and even when you try, even when you try to lay down and die, your body refuses, it takes the reigns, and it keeps up the work itself with or without your help. And it's not until your stomach is full and your teeth are stained and you feel a pulsating burning in your bones that you snap back awake, completely conscious, just fine. You're lucid, you don't feel any more pain. Everything around you is dead and drained and messy and your heart still isn't beating. but you can breathe now and holy shit you guess you literally need to kill to survive and the less you eat and the more you starve yourself the worse it gets when your body finally decides to take recourse.

my idea was like. "the vampires curse is actually stored in the bones, thats why the teeth get so sharp and also theres a connection between blood and bones with the creation via bone marrow" its literally like i was sitting there thinking "no no no, whats it like to be a vampire. what neurosis would you develop. How would you panic? What are common mistakes beginner vampires make" which, by the way, gordon is a beginner vampire

so now you gotta factor, what blood lasts for how long? how long can you go between meals? not only that, but what creatures satisfy the urge? How long can you go avoiding human blood? Does it work like drugs where you develop a resistance to the high, or is it like food where it will keep you moving until you eat again? How the fuck are you gonna get your hands on blood? Can you just eat raw meat? Does that count? and thats where im at lol

OKAY now. now thoughts on beginning scenes of vampire au

So my idea was this Doomguy is a vampire hunter independent and one of his buds says that some freak scared and almost attacked his daughter when she got too close to his old abandoned laboratory up the hill and hes like “he might be… you know… a problem. if you needed a lead” and guys like yeah i fuckin hate the undead ill kill this dude so he busts into old lab space and sees so many dead animals its actually mostly Bones and pelt that hes seeing piles of feathers etc so hes like yeah this is all telltale signs of vampire uhhh hes introduced to gordon SOMEHOW im not totally sure of the details but the working idea i have is guy falls into a trap gordon devised that restrains him suspended in wire or something and gordon like. limps/stumbles into the room and this dude looks haggard he’s breathing heavy, his cheeks are hollow, he’s bug-eyed and shaking while looking at this massive wall of meat in his trap and he bares a bunch of hideous teeth and grits them and looks like hes really struggling with somethin... Like if these dudes don't know each other then Gordon might give in and try to drain Guy, and Guy would absolutely do anything in his power to turn this new vampire into ash, im thinking the inclusion if g-man as a coven leader can fix both issues.

i like the idea of guy falling into gordons trap and gordon thinking about what to do with him before gman shows up and whisks gordon away for a “meeting” while complimenting him on his good work catching the most feared vampire hunter in the country and gman just leaving guy suspended in wires that he has to fight his way out of. Instant situation defuser.

Guy ends up needing to take care of other monsters before going back to Gordon, and he DOES plan to go back to gordon, because no vampire is a good one, especially not one associated with the fucking head of a coven, but next time he sees Gordon, Gordon helps him out of a scrape by attacking and draining a combine who was going to take Guy out or something and escaping before Guy can catch him, or otherwise seeing Gordon do something good with his insane undead powers and like, the third time he meets up with him is when they can actually talk, and Gordons fuckin SO haggard, he’s not even fighting back and he’s even going as far as to say “just make sure theres nothing of me left when you’re done, I don’t want anyone else getting hurt”

Side Note: Guy has a bunch of scarring on his body from dealing with vampires, cops, ghosts, werewolves, anything violent that kills people. I'm playing with the inkling of an idea that he has Divine Blood in him, so that any time something undead bites him or tries to drink his blood, it burns. We'll see.

Side Note 2: now i really like the idea of the combine actually being an organized faction of vampire hunters that are WICKED crooked and exploit people for all their worth in exchange for their “safety” when they kill a vampire They’re essentially loansharks and Guy fucking hates them and hates the name theyve given to vampire hunting

Side Note 3: You've probably noticed that I haven't said anything about John yet! He's in this too. His species is a surprise but I need to get to him later I have an idea for where he came from (Cortana too)

I still need a good reason for Guy to not instantly kill this vampire, if not it's just gonna be "Gordon Freeman escapes the countrys best vampire hunter like a seventh time" every time they meet and they end up being rivals. And it gives Guy enough time to look past the whole "undead monster" thing and start looking at the "Oh this dude figured out how to fight his ridiculous craving for blood in a way more humane than most and is actually staying out of peoples way and keeping to himself. Guess he's not that big of a threat but I still need to keep an eye on him in case he loses it. Turns out he's got a family (Probably Alyx, Eli, Issac and Barney) who's been lookin for him and cares about him as well, don't wanna hurt them". I like the idea of them ending up needing to team up to take out undead together.

And that's what I got so far!!!

#freeguy #gordon freeman #doomguy #vampire au #freeguy117

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ordinaryschmuck · 2 years

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Can you do one were boscha has vampire like blood thirst and in the middle of the cafeteria amelia offers to let boscha drink from her neck but boscha loses herself in the sweet taste and almost drains her friend. luz and amity hear abt the boscha blood Amelia incident and go to confront her abt it only to be shocked to find her with her hair down fangs dug into her own wrist intoxicated by her thirst , anger turns to worry some concern as they have to physically restrain her before shes too far gone. finale of vampiric triclops ,boscha goes to owl house and begs eda to plz kill her luz and co protest but they see just how broken boscha is, she then falls unconscious from stress.When she goes to beg eda kill her amity will also be there

(This is what you're getting into, by the way. So...)

(TW: Blood. Self-harm. Suicidal thoughts and pleas for assisted suicide. Did I mention the blood?)

Bloody Boscha

Boscha tapped a finger onto her table, eyes scanning around to look at the several students in the cafeteria.

She can smell them.

She can almost taste them.

And is thirsty because of it.

"Are you ok?"

Boscha looked out of the corner of her eye. Sitting next to her was Amelia, giving the triclops a concerned stare.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Boscha lied.

"You don't look fine."

"Well, I am."

"Come on," Amelia nudged her, "You can tell me. It's what friends are for."

Boscha wanted to refuse. Wanted to tell Amelia to buzz off and stop bothering her.

But the thirst...

"...I'm thirsty."

"...Meme-thirsty, water-thirsty, or...that thirsty?" Amelia asked.

"That thirsty."

"Oh."

"It's getting stronger," Boscha confessed, "I...I don't know what to do about it."

"...You can, you know, give my neck a little nip."

"What?!" Boscha screamed, looking incredulously at Amelia, who seemed undisturbed despite suggesting something so insane.

"Just a small nip," she shrugged, "Only enough to get you through for a little while."

"I can't let you make me do that."

"I won't let you take much. Once it feels like you've had enough, I'll tell you."

She then leaned close to Boscha, turning her head sideways to show off more of her neck.

"...You sure?"

"Mm-hm. Go for it."

Amelia waited patiently, strumming her fingers onto her knees. For a while, nothing happened. That is until she finally felt four pinpricks into her neck. It hurt, no doubt about it. But similar to how a needle hurts when a healer draws blood. It was quick, made Amelia a little dizzy for a bit, but ultimately nothing too bad.

"Ok, that should be enough," she said after a while.

But the draining didn't end.

"...Boscha," Amelia spoke up, concern in her voice, "You can stop now."

Boscha heard her friend but didn't listen.

She wanted more.

MORE!

"BOSCHA!" Amelia screamed, "STOP! PLEASE, YOU NEED...to...ssssstooooooop..."

Boscha would have kept going. She really would have. But the feeling of two big hands gripping her sides and yanking her off her meal forced Boscha to stop. She growled in protest, of course.

Until she saw what was before her.

Amelia, skin pale and breathing shallow, lying on the cafeteria floor.

"Someone get her to a healer, fast!" Boscha heard someone scream. At that point, the big hands dropped her, and it was then that Boscha realized it was an abomination that stopped the triclops from draining her friend. And it was that same abomination that walked over to Amelia and scooped her up, taking the girl out of the cafeteria and into the healer's office.

"What did you do?"

Boscha looked up, seeing Amity stare at her with such disdain.

It was then that Boscha did the first thing that came to her mind. She got up and ran.

Where? She didn't know.

She just couldn't be there.

Not right then.

***

"Boscha's a vampire?!" Luz yelled her question to Amity as they walked through the halls of Hexide later that day.

"No--Well..." Amity thought for a minute, "She's not technically a vampire. I mean, in a lot of ways, she's similar. The thing is that vampires are their own unique species, and Boscha isn't one of them."

"Then what is she?"

"Just a witch with a literal thirst for blood, I guess. It's a problem she always had. But it's never been that bad."

"Define bad."

"Well, ok, Boscha has sucked a bit of blood before. Most of the time, she managed to be alright until the end of school, when her parents give her blood 'generously' donated from their servants."

"Oh, that's...insanely awful," Luz said simply.

"Yup. There were times when Boscha needed just a quick bite, but she always powered through. She never drank blood from someone at school, let alone nearly draining Amelia."

"Is she going to be ok?"

"The school's healer did all she could. Thankfully, some with far more advanced spells came in on time. Who knows what would have happened then."

"I think it's best we don't think about that," Luz decided. She was ready to leave things at that, but then the human noticed her girlfriend's concerned expression. "Hey, are you ok?"

"...I've never seen Boscha that freaked out before," Amity confessed, "I used to think that she would be cold-hearted enough to commit murder. But seeing her like that, like she's scared about what she did, it...it feels wrong. Almost unsettling."

"More unsettling than what she did to Amelia?"

"I know it doesn't make sense, but--"

Suddenly, Amity stopped in her tracks, her mouth clamping shut.

"...Ami--"

Amity shushed Luz.

"Do you hear that?"

Luz was ready to object until her ears finally picked up on something.

It was faint, far, yet still apparent.

"Is that...heavy breathing?"

"...I have a hunch," was all Amity said as she speed-walked down to the source of the noise. Luz was right there beside her, pulling a glyph out just in case.

The two walked further down the hall, the breathing getting louder yet sporadic, almost like how a person takes a long swig of water only to have a break so they can breathe.

By the time Luz and Amity turned the corner, what they saw made their hearts sink to their stomachs.

It was Boscha.

She was sitting against the wall, her wrist to her mouth, and making this grotesque sucking noise.

"Boscha?"

Boscha didn't respond. She just kept sucking.

"Boscha!"

"Can she even hear us?" Luz asked, ready to run. Whether it was to run forward to stop Boscha or away to get help, she was still deciding.

"I don't know," Amity admitted, "But I do know that she's going to drain herself if we don't do something."

"Got it," was all Luz needed to hear, slamming a plant glyph down onto the floor. Instantly, a vine shot out from it, wrapping around Boscha's arm and yanking her wrist away from her fangs.

Boscha then growled in protest.

"What are you doing?!"

"What are you doing?" Luz countered, "You looked like you were about to drain your whole body!"

"So what if I do?!"

"So wha--Because you'll DIE!"

"Maybe that's for the best!" Boscha cried. "Maybe with me dead, I won't eat my best friends anymore."

Luz and Amity shared a look, both of them shocked by Boscha's confession.

"You...you can't mean that," Luz said.

"Of course I mean it!" Boscha yelled at her, tears beginning to form in the corner of her eyes. "My thirst for blood is getting worse every day! What I did to Amelia is just the beginning, and it's only a matter of time before I start attacking someone else with the same amount of bloodlust! Do you want that to happen?!"

"Of course, we don't want that," Amity told Boscha, "But--"

"But nothing!" Boscha sobbed. Genuinely sobbed. "I'm a monster! And the best way to deal with a monster is to kill it! Now, let me go so I can finish the job!"

Luz and Amity stood stunned.

"We...we can't let you do that."

"Then kill me yourselves! Please! Please...please...just kill me..."

"...What do we do?" Amity asked Luz.

"Wha--why are you asking me?"

"Because you always know how to help people."

"I...I don't know how to fix this. I really don't...Maybe I know someone who could?"

***

"So, what's happening?" Eda asked Luz and Amity, who now held a tied-up Boscha in front of them.

"I want you to kill me," Boscha said.

"No, that's not what's happening," Luz protested, "Boscha is dealing with what is an insatiable thirst for blood. I was hoping you have any idea to help her get through it."

"No one can help me! My parents have been trying for years, and the only solution they came up with was drinking blood! The only real solution is killing me! So kill me!"

"Yeah, I'm not going to do that," Eda made clear, "Don't know why you'd bring her to me, though."

"Because, well," Luz now felt unsure, "I figured since you were cursed--"

"IT'S NOT A CURSE!" Boscha wailed, "IT'S A WAY OF LIFE, AND IT SUCKS! IT REALLY SUCKS! Stop trying to fix the unfixable and kill me! Just KILL ME!"

"Boscha, we're not--"

"KILL ME!" Boscha started thrashing, "KILL ME! KILL ME! K-KILL--KILL ME! KILL! KILL ME! KILL...kill...kill...me..."

Boscha lowered her head, tears streaming down her face with all she was muttering being "kill me."

"Oh, this is rough," Eda admitted, "I don't even know where to begin."

"Neither do we," Luz agreed, "But we've got to do something. We can't just...leave her like this."

"Kid, this isn't something we can fix. I don't think this is anything anyone can fix."

"But she isn't unfixable," Amity protested, "There has to be something we can do."

"I wish there was. Really, I do. But this kid has some severe issues. And we're not the ones to do it."

"Then who can be?"

"I...I don't know."

"...Eda," Luz looked to her mentor, "You're not actually going to--"

"Of course not!" Eda screamed, stopping that train of thought before it left the station. "I've done a lot of things, broken a ton of laws, but I absolutely draw the line at killing kids. I shouldn't have to explain how that's not right."

"Then what can we do?"

"...Get her help? Like, actual mental help. Make sure someone can treat Boscha and get her to a point where she won't be as dangerous anymore."

"Will she be ok, then?"

"To be honest, I don't think there's a point where she'll ever be ok."

Eda looked down at the young girl, now fully passed out from the stress of it all.

"All we can hope for is that she'll be better than this."

***

It was three months since the incident. Boscha sat on her bed, tapping the cloth blanket with her finger. She looked around the small room they had put her in. It had plain white walls with only a poster or two on them, with enough room for a dresser with a crystal ball and her bed that was barely big enough for her body. Boscha's eyes then looked to the locked, metal door with a slot on the bottom of it.

A slot that just now got opened up by someone on the other side, who then slid in a tray that had a bowl of blood on it.

Instantly, Boscha dove for the bowl, slurping it up with an intense speed. As per usual, she set the bowl back onto the tray and slid it all out.

"There's also some mail for you on there," the witch said on the other side. Curious, Boscha then slid the tray back in. Sure enough, there were a few letters on it as well. Letters that she ignored due to the bloodlust.

Taking the mail and sliding the tray back out again, Boscha had then gone back over to her bed. She had three letters.

One was from her parents, no doubt sending the usual 'hope you get better.'

Another was from Luz and Amity, who probably just wanted to make sure if the institute Eda suggested was working. It did. But barely.

And the third made her heart sink to her stomach.

Because the third letter was from Amelia.

Hands shaking, Boscha slowly opened the envelope and pulled out a piece of paper with Amelia's messy handwriting on it.

'Hey, Bosch,' it read, 'I heard what happened to you. And, to tell you the truth, I'm so sorry things have gone that far for you. I hope you get better, I really do. And, don't worry about me. I'm fine. I really am. What you did was not great, sure. But you couldn't control yourself. I shouldn't hold that against you.

'Best of wishes, Amelia.'

Tears fell onto the letter. Tears that were then followed by a sob as Boscha pressed the letter close to her heart.

For the first time in months, Boscha felt a sense of relief, so much that she had no choice but to cry her eyes out from how overwhelming it felt.

She may not ever get better. But at that moment, she certainly felt better.

#the owl house #toh boscha #toh amelia #amity blight #luz noceda #eda clawthorne #the hiatus of drabbles #tw: blood #tw: self harm #tw: sucidal thoughts

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liptonsbabe · 3 years

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The light is coming [B.W]

Bill Weasley x Lexington! reader

Chapter 1

Summary: The power of the Dark Lord shakes the entire magical community to its foundations, no one is safe as Lord Voldemort is so strong and the boy who lived becomes weaker; The magnanimous Order of the Phoenix is in dire need to gather all its members and even to recruit wizards beyond the borders of the community.

Albus Dumbledore knows that amidst the reign of darkness, the light will return to restore all that it took and bring with it extraordinary powers, even if it leaves an aftermath that cannot be erased. The Order of the Phoenix will need all the help it can get, including the help of the mythical (Y/N) Lexington.

Harry Potter's parents were not the only ones killed by the hands of Lord Voldemort.

Word count: 1.8K

Warnings: none

A/N:Hi! A new Bill’s fanfic for you all. This story is finished so if you like this part let me know so and i’ll update as soon as i can! Again, reader’s last name is Lexington but is just for the plot of this story

English not my mother language so please don’t kill me. Enjoy!

Chapter 1: The Order Of The Phoenix

Charlie and Bill Weasley had returned from their jobs abroad with the only purpose of duly serving the Order of the Phoenix commanded by Albus Dumbledore. For Bill it hadn’t been a sacrifice to return home, things in Egypt were not going at all well and he only asked for his transfer to an English office to work and at the same time help the Order. It wasn’t the same for his brother Charlie, cause he had to leave all his errands in Romania along with all his beautiful dragons.The journey to Grimmauld Place had been complicated cause, despite not missing anything from the countries they were returning from (with the exception of Charlie's dragons) they could quickly get used to the quiet, anti-Voldemort pace of life that the English magical community was vitiated by.

Both brothers were welcomed by their mother Molly Weasley, with tears in her eyes she hugged them as tightly as she could inviting them into the farthest room possible. Bill remembered Grimmauld Place very vaguely, the only time he set a foot inside the house was when Dumbledore asked him to help him clear the rooms and turn them into curse free spaces where they could quietly discuss classified Order business.

No matter how many times they cleaned that place, the old house of Black would always remain with that grayish appearance and the musty smell of worn wood. Sirius didn't seem to have any intention of renovating its fallen parts - of which there were quite a few - but seemed to enjoy watching the house fall apart. Be that as it may, Bill thought that any place was a good place to plan the crazy moves Albus Dumbledore had in his head.

The room was filled with people Bill had met before through letters his mother sent him informing him of the Order's progress, Dumbledore thought the best way to gain the upper hand against Voldemort's dark army was to recruit wizards who were willing to give their lives to protect the magical community. Surprisingly more people arrived than Bill could have imagined in addition to all those wizards and witches who had already been part of the association for years.

Taking a seat by the door, Bill and Charlie recognized the silhouette of Nymphadora Tonks. Not that it was very difficult to recognize her as her short, straight, bubblegum pink hair stood out among all the others. The metamorphmagus managed to acknowledge the newcomers sending them a warm smile before gluing her gaze on the door.

Charlie elbowed his brother's shoulder

“Dumbledore and his crazy schemes making us come here just for the Order business....”

“It was necessary," Bill cut him off, looking at him out of the corner of his eye, "Do you even know what's going on with He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, don't you?” Charlie shook his head “it’s a real mess and you'd know it if you didn't spend so much time with your dragons.

“Don't bring them into this”

“They're some of them now?”

“Yeah, we got a shipment of Peruvian Vipertooths in this month and oh, brother, they're beautiful!”

“Wait” Bill frowned ”Those things doesn’t eat people?

“well yes, but that's only part of their diet, they also feed on goats and cows. We keep them in a cage near the forest because that species was supposedly exterminated after being considered dangerous to wizards and muggles alike, but I think they're beautiful”

Charlie's eyes sparkled and Bill couldn't help thinking that he was the odd one among his siblings. His admiration for dragons frightened him even though he found it adorable at times.

“You know, I'm not surprised you're still single. Knowing you as i do, you'll end up marrying one of those dragons or in the worst case, eaten by one”

Charlie didn't like his older brother's comment.

“What about you? As far as I know, you're not dating someone either”

Charlie's sudden criticism made him clear his throat and settle better in his seat. When they looked over at Tonks, they noticed that she was still staring at the door. Charlie hurried him to answer his comment.

“I met someone” His brother's blue eyes widened, amazed “I mean, we met in Egypt, she was traveling and we only went out a couple of times, nothing important.

“That's what you always say, William” Charlie looked at him mischievously ”No one seems to be good enough for you, huh? Or are you still thinking about someone since our childhood?”

Bill knew what his brother was trying to do and immediately shook his head. He had had this adolescent love for a girl who had left to France without anyone knowing the reasons why. Bill was totally hooked on her, yet the disappointment of her being thousands of miles away from him had broken his heart in a way he couldn't explain. Charlie knew about it, because he was the only one of his siblings who was old enough to understand; still, that didn't take away from the fact that he made fun of her misfortune a couple of times.

“Shut it”

Albus Dumbledore brought an end to everyone's conversations after standing up and clapping his hands a couple of times to get their attention. With a sincere smile, Dumbledore dimmed the lights in the room to reveal dozens of candles levitating all over the place. Bill fell silent and looked at the man

“I know that most of you here had to pause your activities just to attend this extraordinary meeting of the Order of the Phoenix, and for that I want to thank you," Dumbledore smiled at them, "We are fully aware of what is happening in the magical community thanks to the terrible presence of Lord Voldemort," Dumbledore ignored the shrieks of amazement from the audience “That leaves me with the advantage of not having to explain what is obvious to you, so the important thing about this assembly is to make it clear that, despite the magnificent increase in our membership over the past few days, we are still in the minority against the Dark Lord's ranks”

The murmurs grew louder and louder, causing Dumbledore to ask for everyone's calm.

“This doesn’t mean that your help is in vain, what I am trying to say is that we need more wizards and witches to join the Order”

“Where will we get more people?”Asked a witch wearing a yellowish hood on her head, "People are afraid, they're not going to join the Order just like that”

“We'll try to convince them," Dumbledore said calmly. "Of course, all of those who want to join will have to undergo proper training.

“So you're asking for more Aurors?”Minerva McGonagall asked. Professor Dumbledore smiled broadly

“Indeed”

The hubbub in the room intensified for a couple of minutes before Albus Dumbledore called for silence. Bill agreed with everyone that this was sheer madness. It was practically impossible for aurors to enter something as sensitive as the Order of the Phoenix - with the exception of Tonks and Mad-Eye Moody, Bill thought those two were insane - without them reporting every movement of Order members to the Ministry. Yes, the aurors were the best trained people for this kind of work, however, they were the hardest to convince

“Why don't we just make Harry a part of the team?”Asked Sirius from the middle of the room. Molly Weasley let out a shriek of indignation.

“What are you talking about? Harry's just a boy!”

“Molly, please, the boy knows more about this situation than any of us put together!”

“Even so, it's still dangerous for him”

“It is for everyone. I don't see what difference it makes if Harry is in on it, that way he'd have more support from the Order and He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named would stay away from him”

-If it is true what Sirius says," Dumbledore interjected, "It's no less true that Harry can't be a member of the Order yet. Not until he fixes the problem he has with the ministry after he used magic in front of a Muggle trying to ward off the Dementors that are getting closer and closer to non-wizards. Right now Harry should be being moved to this place to stay at least until the new school year begins.

“And in the meantime what are we going to do?” Severus Snape asked. Bill raised his eyebrows, noticing how Nymphadora Tonks raised her hand to give her opinion.

“I hope this isn't too hasty, but I've been sending some letters to Beauxbatons College in France in search of a response from the Aurors. It is well known that none of them have been willing to give us their help, but this afternoon I received a letter from one person who is willing to help us in any way she can," Tonks looked at everyone before continuing, "I know that one person doessn’t represent a great addition to our ranks, but I am absolutely certain that she is our best option”

Bill's eyes flicked from Nymphadora to Dumbledore repeatedly. He had that strange feeling that Dumbledore knew who she was referring even though she hadn't said the name yet. Dumbledore nodded a couple of times asking Tonks to continue. She cleared her throat

“She should be here soon”

“We’ll wait patiently”

Dumbledore's nod wasn't necessary cause seconds later the door flung wide open letting in the light from the main corridor. Bill glanced at the newcomer noting your expensive French clothes and your perfectly coiffed hair in a ponytail. His breath quickened as he took a close look at your face and recognized those features he remembered from when he was a teenager. A quick glance at Charlie was enough to confirm that what he saw was not an illusion.

The whole room rose to their feet, and as you entered the room raising your hands to the sky, the room was filled with a bright light that caused everyone to take cover before it blinded them permanently. Bill caught a glimpse of Tonks' pleased giggle before you reached Dumbledore giving him a handshake as a greeting while keeping the light alive with your opposite hand.

Your wand was in your jacket pocket and from your hands an endless fountain of light gushed forth, bringing peace to the members of the order.

The mythical (Y/N) Lexington didn’t needed a wand to have magic.

#bill weasley #bill weasley imagines #bill weasley x reader #domhn #domhnall gleeson imagine #domhnall gleeson x reader #harry potter imagine #harry potter cast #charlie weasley #fred weasley imagines #order of the phoenix

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imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl · 4 years

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The Perfect Bad Boy (Pt. 10 of 18)

Pairing: Billy Hargrove X Reader

Word count: 2.7K

Summary: Working as a lifeguard in the Hawkins Community Pool, you try to fit in after moving from New York. Things were going pretty well when you notice you've been under someone's stare. Billy Hargrove, Hawkins' bad boy, has been staring at you since day one. You never intended to have anything to do with him, judging by the reputation he has. But Billy won't leave you alone, determined to show you his feelings are different this time...

As if your heart flooding you with confusing feelings wasn't enough, there are weird, strange animals lurking in the woods... But those have to be just part of the wild live of the woods surrounding Hawkins... Right?

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{Stranger Things Masterlist}

Monsters Lurking In The Dark

Yesterday's happenings are making a lot of people talk to you today. They ask if you're alright, if you had to go to the hospital, why Billy ran like a lightning bolt to reach you... Some of them are actually being kind. Others, not so much. It feels like they're trying to get you to say something else, scavenging for a secret. Jason is the only one to actually get into a long conversation, making sure you're alright and giving you tips to avoid heat exhaustion again. But the others, mostly the girls, make awkward questions. You get that Billy's behavior is changing. Monica is often telling you about how some girls ask her if she knows what's going on between you and Billy. She never answers though, saying this isn't their business.

As you pace around the pool, a bottle of water on your hand since Billy is literally forcing you to drink water by the hour, you spot him chatting with some of his friends. Tommy and Carol are the only ones you can name, and you never got why you only hang out with your friends and not his. Billy has his eyes on the pools and the whistle between his lips. Tommy goes on about something, and suddenly, Billy lets the whistle fall, giving Tommy a weird stare. You giggle a little at his expression, crossing your arms.

“Look who's staring now,” Monica says in a provoking tone, stopping by your side. “But I totally get it. I'd be shamelessly staring too if I didn't have my sweetheart.”

“How's Christopher by the way?” She told you he had an accident in the garden, which got him a nasty cut on the leg.

“Complaining. But I'm enjoying taking care of him.” She smiles, and her eyes shine. Every passing day you're more convinced they're in love with each other. That you'll be attempting to their wedding one day. “What about you? You gotta be careful with the sun.”

“I am.” Raising your hand, you show her the bottle. “Billy is driving me insane. I swear I can't drink any more water today.”

“Can you blame him? I thought he'd have a heart attack yesterday.” He tilts her head to where he is, across the pools. His eyes meet yours and he winks. “Poor guy, he has it bad for you.”

Giggling, you look down because you're surely blushing. “Oh, tell me something. Some people came to talk to me, you know. Asking if I was alright. But some of them made some very awkward questions.”

“Yeah, that's because they think you're pregnant.”

Your eyes go wide, and you gasp, feeling your whole body numb for a moment. “What the hell,” you exclaim, a little too loud. Looking around, you notice some eyes on you. “Holy shit, Monica. Tell me you're joking.”

“Small town, (Y/N), people talk.” She puts a hand on your shoulder. “Trust me, half the women here went through something like that. They'll let go in a few weeks.”

“Do you think Billy knows?” You lift your eyes to look for him, but you only find his friends.

“Probably. But look, don't worry about it. You're the new girl who managed to hook Billy Hargrove, the town's bad boy. People will talk, but don't let it ruin what you have with him.”

“No, of course not.” As much as it bugs you, it doesn't change anything. “You know I'm falling for him, right?” You burst out, feeling the sudden need to let it out your chest. “Completely.”

“I'm noticing. You–”

She's cut short when you're pulled into something. Someone. You roll your eyes because you know who it is. Billy pulls you against his chest, his lips on your ear. “Do you know what they're saying about yesterday's episode?” He whispers, a hand coming to caress your belly.

Great. Now this will certainly make people forget this story. “Yeah. They think I'm carrying a tiny Billy.” You mutter, waving at Monica as she walks away with a smirk on her lips. “Was that what Tommy told you? You made a funny face.”

“Yes, but he said it in a way that almost had me breaking his ugly nose.” He keeps you close, despite the public. And honestly, you don't mind. A few days ago you'd push him away, but now... They'll speak anyway, so it doesn't matter.

“Hey, why don't we never hang out with your friends?” You take the chance to ask. “You don't want them to see you with me?” It's impossible not to follow this train of thought, and it does sound stupid judging by the way he's holding you right now, for everyone to see.

“Of course not. It just that I know the kind of assholes they are and I'm sure you won't like them.”

“But it's weird. I don't want you to think I'm forcing you to only hang out with my party.”

He takes a deep breath, and you feel his chest moving. That reminds you he's shirtless... “I'll introduce you to them... In the funfair tomorrow.”

“Oh my God, the funfair!” You exclaim. People have been talking about it for a few days, but you totally forgot. “I've never been to anything like that.”

“You're gonna love it.”

“You two. Back to your chairs.” The manager shouts from somewhere behind you, and you both roll your eyes at the same time.

“Talk to you later,” you tell him, tiptoeing to kiss his cheek.

“Remember to–”

“Yeah, yeah. Water, stay in the shadow. If I feel dizzy I'll shout for my knight in shining armor.” Walking backwards, you smirk at him. “Eyes on the pool, Hargrove,” you warn him, turning around and making your way back to the chair.

You're glad you're feeling good, no sign of anything you felt yesterday. And it isn't as hot as it was, so that's a bonus. You're peacefully watching the kids, yelling at some, threatening some teenagers to ban them for life, just the normal stuff. Through the corner of your eye, you notice Billy gesturing. When you look at him, he shows you his bottle.

Shaking your head no, you try to ignore him. But you are a little thirsty, so you sigh before jumping to the ground. On your way to the cafeteria, you stop by his chair. “Want some?”

“Nah, I'm good.”

“Don't act like you can't be beaten by heat exhaustion too, Hargrove. I'm bringing you some cold water.” Punching his leg playfully, you go to the cafeteria.

You're a little startled to find James in there, seated on the table next to the wall, both hands on his head. As you silently open the fridge, you wonder if you should just leave him alone. You never really spoke, and since he switched his schedule with Billy, you have seen less of him. Today should be his day off if you're not mistaken.

“Hey, James,” you say in a soft voice, standing by the fridge as you take one of the bottles Billy has for you. “You ok?”

“Huh?” He looks up abruptly, suddenly aware he's not alone. “Hey.”

You were going to leave, but he seems scared... Red eyes as if he didn't get any sleep. “Is something wrong?” You sit before him, placing the bottle on the table. “You look... sad.”

“Oh, it's just... Nothing, really. It's stupid.” He's mumbling under his breath, a line of sweat on his forehead.

“Whatever it is it's not stupid. Who told you it was?”

“My parents, my brother.” He breathes out, his eyes suddenly meeting yours. “You're new here, right? Did you move from a big city?”

“New York. Why?”

“I'm from Washinton. Have you ever crossed paths with something in the woods? Some... Some kind of animal? And when you told someone they just said it was because you're some big city kid who's not used to live so near the forest and because of that you're easily impressed by anything weird you see?” James speaks fast, so fast it's hard to keep up.

“Actually yes.” You nod, keeping your voice low and soft in an attempt to calm him down. You never saw anyone so scared. “A few weeks ago I saw something, but I didn't get a good look at it. Don't know what it was.”

“I don't know what species of-of... Things they have here, but what I saw... I couldn't sleep. I thought about telling the chief of police but everyone keeps saying I'm crazy.”

“What did you see, James?”

He puts his hands on his head again, looking at the table. “It... It was the size of a dog. And I thought it was a stray dog so I stopped the car and followed it.” His voice cracks, so you get up, moving to sit on the chair beside him, touching his arm. “It was so damn dark and I had no flashlight. It was near a tree, eating something. I started calling it, trying to show it I was just trying to help but then... It-It turned at me and... Shit, the damn thing had no face. It was blank. Sticky... no fur, no eyes, nothing.” He moves suddenly, holding both your shoulders roughly. You gasp at the sudden change, looking at him, tears threatening to roll down from his eyes. “I ran like hell. I told my parents the moment I got home but they said it was something in the woods playing tricks on me but I know what I saw. The damn thing had no face, I swear–”

“Let go of her right now.” Billy's thunder voice makes James jump up, making his chair fall backwards. “What the hell do you think you're doing?”

“Billy, it's alright.” Quickly, you stand up and walk over him.

“I'm sorry, I just...” James tries to speak, hands raised in defeat. It looks like he didn't know what he was doing. “Sorry, (Y/N).”

He walks around the table, eyes on the floor. Billy gives a step towards him, but you hold him back, both hands on his chest. “Billy, no. Listen...” You whisper to him, your eyes meeting his when James finally leaves the cafeteria. “He wasn't trying to hurt me or anything, he was just scared.”

“Scared of what?” He looks down at you, his hands softly rubbing the skin of your shoulders. “It'll leave bruises. What the hell did he think he was doing?”

As much as you melt a little to feel his touch after the sting from James' grip, you have this feeling in your stomach. You can't seem to shake it away, and the more you think, the worse it gets. “Billy... Remember when I told you I saw something in the woods?” He nods, confused. “James saw it too... Same description. He... He said it had no face, and I... I think that's exactly what I saw.”

His expression changes, and you can't read his face. Taking a deep breath, he sits on the table, pulling you to sit beside him. “James came here a few months ago. From a big city too, so it's normal to be scared when–”

“He was desperate because that's exactly what people are telling him.” You cut him off, running a hand through your hair. “Billy, he wasn't scared. He was terrified.” Your voice gets lower, as your mind floats back to what you saw. Naked skin, as if it was green, covered in some disgusting thing... “I know it sounds crazy, but I swear to God his description matched what I saw that day.” It suddenly comes to your mind... There was a lab here. A lab and a bunch of weird stories about it. “Hawkins National Lab!” You exclaim, jumping to your feet. “What if they made an experiment with some kind of animal and now it's free in the woods?”

“Hawkins Lab was closed years ago.”

“I know but–” Billy takes your hand, pulling you close. He holds you by the hips, raising his head to meet your eyes from his seated position.

“Princess, listen. It's true there was a lab, and it's also true that the darkness and these woods play tricks on people who aren't used to them.” He speaks slow, eyes never leaving yours. “It may be something but it could also be a big misunderstanding. If it happens again, if you or anyone else sees anything like that, we'll tell the cops and let them deal with it.”

Taking a deep breath, you decide to let his calming tone relax you. “Alright...” Nodding, you take a look at your shoulders, spotting the purple marks of where James fingers dig into your skin. “The guy was really out of his mind,” you mutter.

“Yeah...” Billy stands up, placing a kiss on both your shoulders before straighten up, his index finger on your chin. “Let's go back there before Anthony notices we're gone again.”

Nodding, you follow him back outside.

• • •

You wish you knew how to draw. If you did, you'd make a scratch of the animal you saw, and another one of what James described, just to see if they would really match.

You're staring at the ceiling, on your unusually empty bed. Having Billy here was amazing. Beyond amazing. Having his strong arms around you, and waking up next to him on the morning was pure bliss. You never thought such a feeling existed. It felt like home, like life was nothing but a long road leading you to that very moment. To his embrace, so warm and calming.

You chose to think about that instead of the unclassified animal. That brings a shiver down your spine, different from the shivers Billy causes. The last ones are made of nervousness, excitement... All those silly things. Tossing around, you sit up, your feet on the cold floor. Your eyes fall on the necklace, that you always keep on the nightstand. Billy kept his promise, and he wears his piece every day. You have to tell him he doesn't have to, not anymore. He already made his point, and you know he has other earrings to use.

Smiling to yourself, you pick the necklace up, fingers caressing the metal. You need to tell Billy what you feel. Openly. You do have something going on, but it's still unnamed. And there's no reason to remain that way. If he wants you, if he truly wants to keep you... He has to know you want him too. That you want to be with him, and screw the rest of the world. Screw the past, the gossip, whatever people of Hawkins think. This is about both of you, nobody else. It's useless to keep pretending Billy Hargrove doesn't own your heart. This torture can't continue, there's no reason to.

Your train of thought is interrupted by the phone's loud ring. You're about to answer when you hear your aunt's footsteps downstairs. It's probably Robert, she was saying something about him calling her today. As she picks up, you put the necklace down and walk over the window, feeling the fresh summer breeze tickling your skin.

“(Y/N)!” Diane shouts, and her urgent tone startles you. “(Y/N)! Pick up the phone!” Her rapid footsteps bring her to your bedroom, a worried expression on her face. “Pick up now. It's Max, she's crying. I don't know–”

The mention of Billy's sister has you moving, picking up the light pink phone you have on the nightstand. “Max?” You breathe out, eyes focused on Diane as she breathes fast.

“(Y/N)..!” Her voice is weak, like a low scream. You hear voices behind her, and you immediately recognize Billy's. But there's someone else, a man's voice. “(Y/N), please, you need to–” She's cut short by something breaking. “It's Neil. He's here, please–”

“Hang up the damn–” Then it's over.

For a moment, a second, you just stand there, frozen, looking at Diane. But on the next one, you're moving, your heart threatening to beat its way out of your chest.

“Honey, what is it?” Diane follows as you rush downstairs, grabbing nothing but the car keys.

“Billy's father. I gotta go.” It's everything you manage to say before storming outside.

A/N: Things are about to get chaotic...

@chloe-skywalker @dpaccione @tilesandtokens @dreamin-of-dacre @funeral-7 @uncookspaget @youhavemyfantasticbeasts @dontxfearxthereaper

#imagine billy hargrove #billy hargrove imagine #billy hargrove x reader #billy hargrove x you #billy hargrove x y/n #billy stranger things #stranger things imagine #billy hargrove fanfiction #imagine stranger things #stranger things fanfiction

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rpmemesbyarat · 3 years

Conversation

RP Meme from "A Bug's Life"

Where's the line?!

Do not panic. Do not panic! We are trained professionals. Now, stay calm.

We'll be stuck here forever!

I don't think we can do that.

That's it, that's it. Good. You're doing great. There you go!

Watch my eyes! Don't look away.

Just be confident, dear.

That's our lot in life. It's not a lot, but it's our life.

What did I tell you about trying to fly?

It's not my fault she's so stressed out.

I'm always acting like the sky is falling.

You could have killed somebody over here.

Please forgive me. I'm sorry!

My invention will speed up production.

Oh, another invention?

Aren't you looking lovely this morning!

I'm sorry, I was really just trying--trying to help.

I can make another one.

I'm beginning to think nothing I do works.

Great. One success.

I'm never gonna make a difference.

Being little's not such a bad thing.

Everything that made that giant tree is already contained inside this tiny little seed. All it needs is some time, a little bit of sunshine and rain, and voila!

You've gotta work with me, all right?

You might not feel like you can do much now, but that's just because, well, you're not a tree yet. You just have to give yourself some time. You're still a seed.

DON'T YOU THINK I KNOW A ROCK WHEN I SEE A ROCK?!

You're weird, but I like you.

C'mon! Keep moving! Keep moving!

It was an accident?

Where's the food?

Are you sure it's not up there?

Are you saying I'm stupid?

Do I look stupid to you?

Oh, I see! Under new management. So it's your fault.

First rule of leadership; Everything is your fault.

I swear, if I hadn't promised Mother on her deathbed that I wouldn't kill you, I would kill you!

Shut up! I don't want to hear another word out of you while we're on this island. Do you understand me?

Well, how can I answer? You said I couldn't say another word.

Listen, if you don't keep your end of the bargain, then I can't guarantee your safety.

Someone could get hurt.

You want her? Go ahead. Take her.

Let's ride!

I'm sorry for the way I am. I didn't mean for things to go so wrong.

I was just trying to help.

Then help us-- don't help us.

Perfect? What's so perfect?

Why didn't I think of that? Oh! Because it's suicide!

Who would do a crazy thing like that?

Wait a minute. What did we just decide here?

I won't let you down, I promise, I promise, I promise.

I should help repair the damage before I go.

Get back, you horrible beast!

I have no fear!

I have been in outhouses that didn't stink that bad.

This is ridiculous. What a disappointment!

You! Come here! I want my money back!

I hate performing on an empty stomach!

What's the point of going out there? They'll only laugh at me.

You parasite.

I am a cute little bumblebee! Here I come!

Candy corn! Here, let me help you to finish it.

They are poo-poo heads!

The stage is the other way, dear.

I'm gonna pick the hairs out of your head one by one!

Take your best shot!

That's no way to speak to a lady.

I heard that, you twig.

I demand to know who said that!

How dare you! Ingrates!

I only got 24 hours to live and I ain't gonna waste it here. Come on.

Aah! I've just about had it with these losers! Flaming death!

Water! We need some water!

You're all fired.

Burn him again!

Don't look at the light!

I can't help it! It's so beautiful!

Oh, sorry! Oh. I'm really, really sorry. That was an-an-an ac-ac-accident.

I'll show ya who's tough!

Oh, will you shut up?

Someday I will be a beautiful butterfly, and then everything will be better.

Farewell, my friends.

Shoo, fly. Don't bother me.

Not so tough now, are you?

Get up and fight like a girl.

What part can I play?

Justice is my sword and truth shall be my quiver!

No, no! I want to watch this!

Thrust, parry, lunge!

Me thinketh it's not working!

Help! Help! Get me out!

You can explain the details on the way.

Whoa, you're vicious!

This is insane.

Quit shoving!

We need a miracle!

Run for your lives!

Once again, our reputation precedes us.

Oh, my ticker!

Bingo! We gotta sweeten the deal.

You should be proud of yourself.

Oh, aren't they adorable!

Okay, honey. You're up.

I'm making a speech.

Shouldn't I come too?

No, classified in the D.M.Z. Gotta go A.S.A.P. You know, strictly B.Y.O.B. Bye!

Are you kidding? Do you know what this is? This, my friends, is false advertising. How dare you!

Give me some time, I'll come up with a plan.

Just go tell them the truth!

The truth, you see, is bad.

I will be branded for life.

If you could squish me, that would be great, because, uh, when they find out, I'm as good as dead.

I really do think I should be part of this meeting.

You can't go! I'm desperate!

I gotcha! I gotcha! I gotcha, I gotcha!

Somebody do something!

I'm going to snap. I'm going to snap.

Suck it in, man!

That, my friends, is the sound of applause!

We voted you our honorary den mother!

You're too kind.

Don't tell 'em I said that.

Boy, that's all I'd need, another royal blunder like that.

I know what everyone really thinks.

Thanks, you're sweet. You're wrong, but sweet.

Nobody really believes I can do this job.

I haven't been that nice to you, and I'm sorry.

Aren't you sweet?

I outrank everyone here. Remember that.

Now you're gonna cry, right?

Please, don't cry. Please.

Keep up the good work.

I mean, why take the risk?

I didn't think it was such a good idea myself. It wasn't even my idea.

They talked fancy to me. I got confused!

Why go back?

Didn't that hurt?

Any sign of those fiends?

Okay, I've told everyone you'll be stationed deep in the command bunker.

Party quiets down, I sneak you out the back way and then you're outta here forever.

He's not fully trained. I mean, house-trained.

It seems we've been booked for an extended engagement.

They're back! Get ready, everybody! Get to your posts!

Battle stations, everyone. This is not a drill. Come on, everyone, you know your jobs! LET'S GO, GO, GO, GO!

You mean, you're not warriors?

You mean to tell me that our entire defensive strategy, was concocted by clowns?!

Tell me this isn't true.

This couldn't have happened at a more inopportune time.

You lied to me! And like an idiot, I believed you.

I just wanted to make a difference.

Tough crowd.

You think this is a game?

You don't want to make him mad. Believe me! No, no, no.

You're staying with me, Your Highness.

Quick! To the clubhouse!

Have you checked over there?

I love our job.

I'm gonna be rich, rich, rich I'm gonna be rich, rich, rich

I'm rich, rich, rich That's who I am

The circus life isn't so bad.

What are you talking about? It was your idea.

I just make things worse.

I've made a living out of being a failure.

You have rekindled the long-dormant embers of purpose in our lives.

They're rounding everyone up.

I promise to start thinking about paying you

Okay, I'll pay ya! I'll pay ya!

WAIT A MINUTE!

I think I'm going to wet myself!

I guess we could use a little entertainment.

On with the show!

The circus, the circus! I love the circus

That's the signal. That's the signal!

A magician never reveals his secrets.

You've got to make it work!

Don't let it get me! Don't let it get me!

Oh, my eye! Help me!

Oh, the pain!

There goes my magic act!

WHOSE IDEA WAS THIS?!

I'm the one you want!

Where do you get the gall to do this to me?

I hate it when someone gives away the ending.

A piece of dirt! No, I'm wrong. You're lower than dirt.

Ideas are very dangerous things.

So who's the weaker species?!

It's you who need us!

We're a lot stronger than you say we are! And you know it, don't you?

Oh, this was such a bad idea!

Quick! After them!

Go that way! I've got an idea!

Come on! We've gotta hide! No matter what happens, stay down!

All your little stunt did was buy them time!

I finally get a second to relax, and I gotta get out of my chair.

I'm not gonna cry. I'm not gonna cry.

Shutting up.

What's with the rock?

Now it's getting mushy.

Finally, I'm a beautiful butterfly!

You better start flying!

I am flying! And from way up here, you all look like little ants!

#rp memes #rp meme #rp starters #roleplay memes #roleplay meme #roleplay starters #a bug's life

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