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#i SERIOUSLY doubt i did any worse than half points on that and probably a lot better.
lonelyquail · 5 months
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whiteknuckling the counter chanting to myself Cs Get Degrees Cs Get Degrees Cs Get Degrees
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scenetocause · 16 days
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ah thank you anon!!! i'm gonna do climb up to your lips because altho i already did the logan ask i have an embarrassing number of thoughts and feelings about. my own fic. good god. but specifically about girloscar and i've been really fighting the urge to write a bit from her perspective because it's unnecessary authorial indulgence but also whatever, doing it for free aren't i.
Oscar's going to fucking die. They can't seriously be making them play Twister, this is like some sort of torture. The team shouldn't be torturing them, they're meant to be driving F1 cars soon. If she DNFs this weekend it's absolutely on marketing.
She says it to Mark, who tells her it's just a bit of fun, mate. Don't worry, he's probably shit at it. Which tells her Mark doesn't know anything about Lando Norris because the guy can contort into a shapes Oscar's never seen before but now very much haunt her dreams even when he's just meant to be sitting in a press conference chair.
It's not fair, being given a hot teammate. She could've had someone weird and awkward like Esteban but the need for a seat, to secure her future, was too strong to worry about the other side of the McLaren garage until she was there and it was suddenly her problem.
Lando's really nice, too. Helps her out, isn't anything like as annoying as she'd expected him to be. He's taken to spending meal times with her and giving her bits of his food and things, probably because he's a fussy little bitch but Oscar still appreciates it. The company, the way he doesn't seem scared of her being a girl, the sort of sad illusion he could be her boyfriend or whatever.
Logan says it's just teammate stuff, that him and Alex do that kind of thing, too. But Oscar's pretty sure Logan's never had Alex bring him a hot chocolate and a brownie just because it was a bit chilly in the sim room that morning. She doubts Logan is having to play Twister with him, either because Williams is a humane team with sane people doing their PR.
Sweating her way through a game of who can look the stupidest between her and the world's hottest, bendiest man has got to be some circle of hell. At one point she somehow ends up having to stick her arse practically in his face and she wishes she'd worn jeans, even if that might make it even worse, just in case he can see her whole bush up the leg or something.
When she admits she's in a world of trouble it's not just because she has no idea where her left foot can go now. Trying not to look Lando in the face is fruitless because he's giggling and keeps wriggling around, getting her attention so she'll laugh with him. Maybe it's awkward for him, too, having some girl he'd rather not touch having to climb all over him.
She knows she doesn't have a chance with him, that he's just being friendly. Lando dates models, influencers, whatever. Pretty, little girls with long hair who tell him he's big and strong or something, not someone taller than him. She can compete with him, not instagram hotties.
It's fine. Oscar could probably get her own instagram hottie if she liked. Or some guy who worked in finance, could look after her future. Handle all that shit, probably be nice enough to her. Mark was suggesting it the other week, that that'd be a good way to plan things out and Oscar's practical enough to know it makes sense.
It's just that she's being really stupid about being in love with Lando Norris. And guys in pinstripe suits make her pussy dry up.
Wanting things comes naturally to a racing driver. And usually there's a set way of getting them: be good enough, win. It's just that she's not going to magically become half a foot shorter, skinny and with a lingerie deal any time soon, so that's not an option.
"You're not putting your foot between my legs." Lando's blushing, mouth wet and panicky-open, like he's going to make one of those screeching noises she shouldn't find cute.
Conceding is the only option. Because Lando's not just laughing, his voice is a croak and he looks - obviously, he's not but - like he's turned on. Like Oscar could push him back onto the mat and kiss him and he'd wriggle and moan just as much as he is now. Like he'd want her to touch him and she knows he doesn't, would probably freak out if he knew the way she thinks about him.
(face down in a pillow, getting fucked raw, that flush high on his skin while he's making all his weird, whining noises and begging to come, still begging for her to hold him afterwards so she can stroke his sweaty curls - it's started invading her thoughts at the worst times, like right now)
Limbo is even worse. She's shit at it and he could probably get under something an inch off the ground. It's awful, Prema challenges were never like this; she might not know how to cook eggs but at least Rob didn't, either.
Lando's clearly insane because he's won both the first rounds, has got this challenge in the bag, except he makes the third one all or nothing. By this point, Oscar had figured it'd probably be slime wrestling or something equally awful but instead they get to sit down and play jenga like relatively normal people.
He absolutely lets her win. Which is shit, as she explains to Logan later.
"I think he just wanted to get away, y'know? Like, obviously he doesn't want to spend time with me, that's fine."
Logan raises his eyebrows, fringe standing on end where he's been running his hand through it. "Didn't you just say he followed you to your driver room and talked about Halo for twenty minutes?"
"Well, yeah but I think he was just hiding from Sophie." And they'd had hats to sign, so it sort of made sense to do it together.
Logan sits back, stretching his legs out in front of him and crossing his arms. "You know how many times Alex has been in my room?"
The fuck would she know that. "No?"
"Zero. Nada. Zilch." Logan looks smug, for some reason. "I've never been in his, either."
"So?" Clearly Williams have different rules. It's not like they're in Logan's room now, sitting out on the patio in front of the motorhome nursing sparkling waters.
"I am just saying," Logan's grinning, like he knows she isn't going to listen to him and thinks it's hilarious. "That doesn't sound like a guy who doesn't want to spend time with you."
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fraudulent-cheese · 3 days
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So i finished watching TDPI (and i have a theory on why it's so hated)
Yeah, it's actually been nearly a week since i watched the finale. Took me that long to scrounge up the motivation to write this post lol
I watched episodes 9-13 with my buddy @rockin-it-rusty again, and i have. thoughts.
Honestly, Hurl and Go Seek and Scarlett Fever were probably the highlights of the season. They're pretty funny episodes, where both Jasmine and Shawn's conflict is solved and Sky and Dave's relationship hits a brick fucking wall due to Dave's own character flaws. The set-up for the challenge is also pretty unique for an eating challenge and i like the comedy! Also Scarlett Fever having an actual antagonistic force is fun.
But i'll be real: I barely even remember anything from episode 11. And i don't remember much from episode 12, either. Doesn't help i wasn't the most concentrated on the episodes themselves, but the challenges and the character relationships weren't the most compelling/interesting to me. I'll say this though, Sugar and Sky's weird little alliance was fun while it lasted.
As for Lies, Cries and One Big Prize... God, the finale's mid. Im already not invested in Jasmine and Shawn's conflict, and im not gonna be invested in this either! But i think Skave's conflict is actually interesting here! Sky kissing Dave while having a boyfriend back home she wanted to break up with but forgetting to is interesting, and even Dave reacting very very badly to being rejected in episode 9 was fun to see. It's like. Oh my god. A relationship this season having some depth??? That i don't need to extrapolate myself?? There's three things that kill it for me though.
If you've been following this blog for a while, or hell have talked to me on Discord, you KNOW i am not a fan of straight, basic romance, and that's basically all that skave is for like half the season. Granted they have a better start than jashawn, who just blush at eachother once and then the plot happens, but that doesn't mean it's any less boring to me! The misscommunications are frustating because they feel completely artificial, and they only get compelling by Hurl and Go Seek. The episode Dave gets eliminated in.
The second thing that bothers me is that Sky leading Dave on in the finale (and that is what she's doing during the final challenge since she doesn't want to date him afterwards) is out of character for her. Her whole thing is winning honestly; she literally tells Sugar two episodes earlier that she can't cheat during the challenges or else they won't have an alliance because Sky's uncomfortable with that. Why would she be comfortable leading anyone on, even if it's for a victory then? It's still cheating! You could argue it's to push a contrast between her sportsmanship and her apparently being a disaster in relationships in that regard but i seriously doubt that's what the writers were going for!
The final nail in the coffin for me though is Dave's entire reaction. It's pretty funny how pathetic he is about it in episode 9, but his attempted murder of Sky is going just a bit too far? Especially since the worst he did earlier on this season was being a little bitch and being insistent. Would i belive he'd probably not react well? Absolutely. Would he try getting back at Sky? Oh, definitely, that guy's not well adjusted. Would he try killing her? I don't think so. I don't know, Total Drama makes you do crazy shit.
But yeah, those last couple of episodes have made me realise exactly why i belive Pahkitew Island seems so hated (and by extension why World Tour is so well liked) and i think it's because of it's ending episodes. The season's peak is reached at Scarlett Fever, to the point every episode afterwards just felt way worse, both in terms of entertainment and writing. Coupled with challenges i wasn't very into, relationship conflict that wasn't very compelling to me and eliminations that weren't very convincing (episode 12 would've been so much more interesting if Sugar had gotten voted out an episode earlier. Even if i love her character!).
Frankly the attempted drama in the finale just reinforces that impression of it all being... Artificial. Not in a "The Island Is Mecanical" kind of way, in a "The Writers Are Just Forcing This Conflict" way. Like it doesn't feel like a thing the story needed, or a conflict that arose naturally from the characters' dynamics with eachother. idk.
Endings both have a huge impact on how people perceive media, as well as a lasting impression on it; it's the reason TV shows can go from dominating Pop Culture to being hated and subsequently forgotten about in a matter of weeks or months if they're lucky. Pahkitew Island is at it's funniest and most entertaining during the middle of the season and it's end arguably contains the weakest episodes out of the entire season. Contrast that with World Tour, which outside of G1 bias has it's better drama and episodes later on since all the characters it flanderized and assassinated aren't there anymore but shush As well as having good moments earlier on. Hell, if you ignore the final two minutes, World Tour can be argued to have one of the best finales and im only not saying it's the best one because both TDI and ROTI exist and have a better one. While Pahkitew Island probably has one of the worst ones. The show kinda just... Ends. Dave probably gets mauled by a robot bear and Sky, Shawn and Jasmine are off the Island and that's that.
That, coupled with the lack of character interactions is probably why people don't tend to talk about this season, which is a SHAME because it's a really fun season, with really fun characters and actually good ideas! It deserves to be explored more, appreciated more!
And with no transition at all, let's talk about my character opinions!
Dave is. Yeah, it's a whole thing. Him being more insistent in episode 9 on charming Sky at the start feels a bit forced? but it's probably because i thought the "bet you still wish i was your boyfriend" line came a little bit out of nowhere for me? Feels like it came from an earlier draft, or the writters of the episodes before it didn't keep track of where his relationship/opinion on Sky was. I do think him taking the rejection awfully and being really pathetic all episode is really funny however, and it makes skave more interesting by default to me, so it helps!
...Ok, fine, i'll talk about the finale. I'll elaborate on this in Sky's section, but it doesn't do Dave's character much favors. He feels a bit more pathetic in that episode before the existence of Sky's boyfriend is revealed, and then the whole reveal happens and... yeah. Dude seems happy by Sky possibly dying. Just feel like that's a little too far? Compared to how he was before? Idk.
I'll talk about Max first over Scarlett because i have way more to say about her than him. He's still funny. My earlier post on him is still right. His elimination is hot garbage btw, dude should've gotten kicked instead of Ella
Now, Scarlett's actually interesting, since we've gotten to the twist; i really like her in concept as a villain that is antagonistic out of a lack of morality and not just. Being a piece of shit. Then again, the whole evil vilain twist in Scarlett Fever kinda sorta entirely goes against this. Genuinely think that Max just made her fucking snap and she tried to blackmail Chris into getting the million herself because she couldn't fucking handle being around this guy. She hates him
Jasmine's fine. It's nice to see her get actual screentime, but wow she spends 90% of it glued to Shawn and it kinda sucks since i don't think i have a great grasp on her personality due to this. When i'll rewatch the season to take more precise notes i'll try to pay way more attention to her character i guess? Her clear trust issues should've been explored, just saying.
Sugar's GREAT. Seriously, she's my favorite part of the show post Scarlett Fever and it's not even close. She's genuinely funny! I love seeing her do her own thing and be a menace, it's great. The show's super mean to her about it? For some reason? I think the writters were trying to treat her like the main antagonist but she really doesn't read like one to me. Girlie deserved that spin off she mentions in episode 9. Or i guess she technically got it since she appears in Dramarama. Maybe i should watch the episodes she's in...
Shawn, like Jasmine, is kinda there for me. I do think creating conflict between these two is a good idea, but the writters just lean wayyyy too hard into the Zombie Apocalypse Nutjob aspect of his personality in episode 11 especially, it just flattens him and it's pretty sad since he's got some interesting things about him, and the way he tries to make it up to Jasmine both time they're in conflict is cute. Wish they actually communicated more tho
Finally, Sky. Oh Sky, how i wish they treated you better. Listen. In theory? I don't hate the idea of Sky having a boyfriend back home she wanted to break up with. Perfect way of adding drama to a character that didn't seem to have any. The problem is the everything with the finale. The writters make her seemingly lead Dave on during the final challenge and while she was probably going to come clean before Dave interrupts her again (which is actually a good way of showing they wouldn't work out due to him not putting in the effort of listening to her), i don't think her doing that at all would be in character. Her whole thing of good sportsmanship and winning without cheating feels off when contrasted with this. Also, girl should've really just said to Dave that she was planning to break up with her boyfriend and not to the confessional camera. Doubt that would've stopped Dave from freaking out, but at least she'll have tried i guess.
SO. I'LL ASK AGAIN: DOES PAHKITEW ISLAND DESERVE THE HATE?
NO. No it doesn't.
I'd even consider it the most underrated season of Total Drama! It just... really got fucked over by circomstances and things out of it's control. This season was written at the same time as All Stars, by like 4 writers, with a whole new cast to flesh out and only 13 episodes to do so and seemingly less ideas. You can tell that by the end, the writers really didn't care and just wanted this shit to end - the final three episodes feel like first drafts, even moreso than the earlier episodes did. And it sucks! It sucks because this season had a whole lot of potential, and it either got wasted or crapped on by the fandom at large!
I just... I wish this season got treated better, is all.
Also why the fuck does Chef only get five lines. What was up with that
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videodrme · 2 years
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The Laura Captured ending lives rent free in my head
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Mostly because there’s no real justifiable or even logical reason for Travis to do it. You could say it was an impulsive decision at best or a premeditated backup plan at worst.
If Travis’ family members are alive you could maybe make an argument that he’s desperately trying to protect them by locking up the one witness who knows the full story.
If they’re all dead though… then why? There’s zero reason to keep Laura. Max is cured or dead. There’s no reason that she’s a threat to Travis anymore. Even if Travis is still seeking revenge on Silas, how much “help” can Laura possibly offer? Especially as someone twice captured and in worse conditions than the first time, I can’t imagine her cooperating much.
There’s also the question of Max. If Max is dead then problem solved, but if Max is alive, do you really think Travis would just let him go? The game doesn’t account for this, but I place my bets on no and that he offs Max just like he offs Ryan when Laura dies — to protect himself from witnesses — cause there’s no doubt Max would bring outside authorities to find Laura. It makes sense because Travis would be in full damage control mode and with Chris and Kaylee dead, he wouldn’t hesitate to tie up another loose end. And honestly, I can’t imagine that Travis would imprison Max like he does Laura. There’s no way he would go to lengths he did during the summer a second time.
No matter which way you slice it, the Laura Captured ending has some dark implications.
Why?
Well, if Travis doesn’t see Silas through, there’s no way for him to heal. Either he’s still on the hook to save Caleb or he’s “trying to protect his family” or he’s alone.
In reality it’s a purely selfish decision.
If Travis for real wanted to protect himself and his surviving family, he’d simply kill Laura for being a witness and his hostage. Just having to keep her alive puts a huge burden on him. The possibility that she might escape puts an additional burden on the family. Not killing her is a massive risk.
If he wanted revenge for her killing his family, he should still kill her, but curiously Travis only takes direct eye-for-an-eye style revenge on her when she shoots him and leaves him for dead. She can kill Kaylee, Constance, Jed, is basically responsible for Chris’ death even if Ryan is the one who pulls the trigger, and bites the shit out of Travis’ arm while in werewolf mode, but even that’s not enough for him to kill her.
If he sincerely wanted her help, he would’ve tried to convinced her somehow to stay and help him.
If he was intending to protect her, then he wouldn’t have shoved her down there half naked still drying in her own blood with zero explanation.
No, he imprisons Laura because he selfishly wants to. He doesn’t want to kill her because she hasn’t caused him any grievous bodily harm, but he doesn’t want to let her go either. He knows that her part in his life is over, and that she’ll go far away from him and never see him again.
He must think that he’s gone this far already, what more does he have to lose?
Cause, like, seriously, what is his endgame here?
The original plan was that he was gonna let Laura and Max go after killing Silas and curing everyone.
But what is the plan now? Even if he (and/or his family) manages to track down Silas and kill him at some point after that night, then will Travis finally let Laura go? I’m not sure how that wouldn’t completely backfire on him. Unless Laura can successfully convince him that she’ll keep quiet (no guarantee), or Travis somehow gets Laura on his side, she’s probably stuck there forever.
The only solid conclusion I can draw from this ending is that Travis wants Laura — and without closure from killing Silas that night — he will never let her go.
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catchester · 2 years
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[I wrote this before I discovered that @violentdevotion has evidently blocked me because they obviously don’t understand the British sense of humour, or their ego is so fraile they can’t stand even a sliver of dissent, but I’d already written the reply below to and I’m not letting it go to waste, so all my 2.4 followers now have to see it on their dash. :-P ]
Yeah, well we tried being a republic. It did not go well. 
Our first and only republican leader was so hated, we dug him up after his death and executed him, then stuck his head on a pike for decades, and it wasn't reburied for about 350 years, and his body is still missing because it was tossed in a pit.
Oh, and  we invited the son of the king he murdered back to rule because let's face it, he couldn't be any worse than Cromwell!
Why was Cromwell so hated? Well he did kill half of Ireland.
If I'm honest though, for most English people it was probably more the fact he was a puritan who tried to ban anything fun, like Christmas. Historically speaking, we (as in the people with power here) haven't given a crap about the Irish for most of our history. And the people without power were mostly too focused on their own survival (it's doubtful most even knew what was going on in Ireland, education wasn't compulsory until the end of the 1800s, and even then, working class families did not have enough to splurge on a newspaper).
Woe betide anyone who tries to take away our christmas pudding though!
But in all seriousness, if we had a referendum tomorrow, I'd vote to become a republic. I have no great love for any royal, and a great deal of hatred for a select few. Charles is mostly harmless, and he has no real power, but he also has no real point.
People will tell you the royal family are good for tourism, but no one comes here thinking they're going to have high tea with the Queen King (still not used to that). Get rid of the royal family and we still have the hundreds of years of history, all the stories, all the jewels and artefacts (some of which, I admit, we should give back to their rightful owners), and all the beautiful castles and palaces. If we want national celebrations like the recent jubilee, well there's over a thousand years of recorded history, I'm sure we can come up with some noteworthy event to celebrate every 10 years or so.
I just like this clip, I think the total nonchalance is amusing in a British 'stiff upper lip' kind of way. But you're probably right, @evieplease, it's more cluelessness than bravery.
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FNaF Rant #3
-(⚠️TW⚠️@b4$3)-
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Sorry not sorry, I fucking hate it when people who haven't been abused, specifically physically, make William a horribly abusive asshole to his kids. The Afton kids show signs of mental/emotional abuse, yes. That's canon, and I won't argue with that. But none of them show any signs of physical abuse throughout the whole fucking series. And don't bring up the goddamn books, I'm so sick of people pulling those books out of their asses for that ONE SPECIFIC THING, only to bury the books for every other piece of lore they've given us. Because the other pieces of lore "aren't convincing", or whatever. Literally stfu, pls. So many of these posts don't have warnings for abuse either, or the warnings come after the abuse/mentions of abuse have already been shown. So many people could be highly triggered by that and other people don't care because their dumbass headcanons come before survivors' experiences.
And I already know someone is gonna try to bring up the books or something so,
1. where in hell were Michael and Crying Child? Did William just not have sons? Is Elizabeth his only bio kid? Even though Michael is a near carbon copy of him? Did he just pick them up off the streets or something?
2. The books have fucking canon mpreg, please do not use these as an argument as to why your headcanons come above someone's personal trauma, you will look like the dumbest person in the room, I promise you
3. The books show us what was(most likely) in the FNaF 4 box, robots can bleed, remnant has the consistency of molten metal, and how illusion disks work, and the only thing you wanna talk about is the book's version of William hitting his kid? Really? There's so much more interesting stuff there, and you continue to bring up something that can be extremely triggering for so many people?
This is also not aimed at people who have been physically abused. Idc how survivors of physical abuse choose to headcanon William, because I know that if a specific character reminds you of your abuser, that will probably never leave your brain. Also, sometimes people just need to vent, and a specific character is good for that. This is aimed at people who haven't been physically abused and continue to decide that they need William to be even worse than he already is in canon.
Another thing I wanna point out. If Michael were even close to half of the "edgy teenager who doesn't give a fuck about anything and hates his dad" as so many people make him out to be, he would have left Hurricane the moment he turned 18, or shortly thereafter, and never gone back. Ever. For anything. Dead children be damned, nothing would have dragged him back there. He had nothing left. No siblings, no mom, probably no friends after the bite. Nothing could have convinced him to go back to Hurricane and do what he did throughout the series. Henry would have had to act by himself. Someone else would have gotten scooped. Michael would have turned to therapy, dr4g$, or religion. Michael's story would have been cut down to FNaF 4, and maybe some cutscenes of his life once he hit adulthood. He also would have had a shit ton of panic attacks, flashbacks, self-doubt, self-blame, and told himself at least once that nothing bad happened/what happened was normal and wasn't bad, and we see none of that throughout the entire series.
Seriously, why do so many people hear the word 'abuse' once in a series and run it into the ground? You guys are honestly draining at this point, and it's getting old. Half of the descriptions of abuse aren't even fucking accurate, and that's how you know that they're putting headcanons above trauma. Just stfu, please.
(another note before I leave, this one is purely a rant/vent thingy, so I really don't wanna fight anyone about this. Plus, William is a fictional character, this shit isn't worth fighting over with people online anyways)
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Alright, I read your recent post and need to know - what is your interpretation of Maglor’s relationship with the twins?
askjdhslkjag my biggest self-inflicted problem in this fandom is that my take on maglor, elrond, and elros' relationship is so intensely detailed and specific i am forever tormented by none of the fic i read ever quite getting it right (from my perspective; i’ve read plenty of fic that presents a good interpretation on their own terms, it’s just never mine.) it’s simultaneously way darker than the fluffy kidnap dads stuff and nowhere near as black-and-white awful as the anti-fëanorian crowd likes to paint it, it’s messy and complicated and surrounded by darkness, and yet there’s also a sincere connection within it which mostly serves to make all those complications worse. angry teenage elrond is angry for a great many reasons, and the circumstances around him being raised by kinslayers account for at least half of them. there’s lots of complexity here, and i don’t see it in fic nearly as often as i’d like
(warning: the post... feathers? i already have an internet friend called faeiri this could be awkward - anyway, the post she’s talking about includes the line ‘everyone is wrong about kidnap dads except me.’ this post follows on from that in being as much a commentary about why various popular interpretations of both how the kidnapdoption went and the way people subsequently characterise the twins just don’t work for me as it is a setting out of my own ideas. i’m not really interested in getting into discourse here, i’m just trying to get my thoughts down. i’ve read fic with these interpretations before that i’ve liked, even, don’t take this as a Condemnation, aight? also this turned out long as hell, so i’m putting it under a cut)
i can never buy entirely fluffy depictions of kidnap dads
which isn’t to say i don’t read them! sometimes all i want is something sweet, for these kids to get to be happy for once. it’s not like i think their time with the fëanorians was completely devoid of laughter
it’s just. the pet names, the special days out, the home-cooked meals, it can get so treacly it stops feeling like the characters they are in the situation they’re in and turns into Generic Found Family #272
it soaks out all the complexity - which is the thing i am here for - and acts like oh, these kids were never in any danger, they were perfectly happy being abducted by the people who murdered everyone they knew, there’s nothing possibly questionable about this relationship at all
and... yeah. that’s not the characters i know. that’s not the context i know they belong to
i just can’t forget the circumstances that led them to meet
rivers of blood, the air filled with screams, a town ablaze, a woman choosing to die. every interaction the three of them have is going to proceed from that nightmare
(sidenote: i tend to hold it was maglor that raised the twins, with maedhros looming ominously in the background not really getting involved. it’s mostly personal preference, i’ve been in and out of the fandom since before this kidnap dads thing blew up and when i joined that was a perfectly standard reading)
(also the cave thing was a dumb idea, old man, if only because it implies beleriand had streams safe enough for children to play in at that point. the way it separates the twins from the third kinslaying is also something i don’t particularly vibe with)
probably my least favourite angle i’ve seen on the situation (edged out only by ‘maglor was actively abusive towards the twins’ which no no no no no no no no NO) is the idea that maglor (and/or maedhros, append as necessary) took the twins specifically to raise them
like, i get where it’s coming from, but it makes maglor come off as really creepy
(i have read fics where it is indeed played off as really creepy, but that’s not a maglor i have any interest in reading about)
(’mags 100% bad’ is just as facile a take to me as ‘mags 100% good’)
even if you’re saying maglor took them in because they had no one left to take care of them - i highly doubt they were the only children the fëanorians orphaned at sirion. idk, it always makes maglor seem much less sympathetic than i think it’s meant to
i prefer to think of it as more... organic? something that evolved, not something that was preordained. them growing closer gradually, the twins finding an adult who might maybe be on their side, maglor becoming invested in them almost by accident
and then the twins are so comfortable with the second scariest monster in amon ereb they frequently sass him off and maglor’s gotten so used to not hurting them he’s not even thinking about it any more. no one’s quite sure how it happened, but they’ve made a Connection
‘wait aren’t they a murderous warlord of questionable mental stability and a pair of terrified small children who’ve lost everyone they ever knew? isn’t that kinda fucked up?’ yup! that’s the point! complexity!
another idea i don’t like is the idea that maglor was an objectively better parent to the twins than eärendil or elwing
other people have talked about this already, i won’t rehash the whole thing. i will say that while i don’t think elwing was a perfect parent - someone so young, in such a horrible situation, i wouldn’t blame her for screwing up - i do think she (and eärendil) did the best by them they possibly could
this is one of the few things they have in common with maglor
something i come across now and again is the idea that sure, elwing and eärendil weren’t abusive or horrible or anything, but they were a couple of basically-teenagers with so many other responsibilities, there was only so much they could do. maglor, on the other hand, is an experienced adult who could take much better care of the twins
and...
first off, it’s not like mags doesn’t have a job. he’s a warlord, he has a fortress to help run, military shit to handle, lots of other stuff that needs to get done to stop everyone from starving or getting eaten by orcs. i feel like sirion had enough of a government there was plenty of opportunity for elwing to take days off and play with her kids, but in the fëanorian camp nobody really has the time to chase after a couple of toddlers, least of all one of the last points on the command network. they just don’t have the people any more
(seriously, the twins getting a formal education with tutors and classes and shit is a weirdly specific pet peeve of mine. this is a band of renegades, not a royal household; if there’s anyone left with those kinds of skills they almost certainly have more important things to do)
more than that, though - well, a quick glance through my late stage fëanorians tag should tell you a lot about what i think maglor’s mental state is like at this point. he is so accustomed to violence death means nothing to him, he’s lost most of his capacity for genuinely positive emotion to an endless century of defeat and despair, he hates everything in the universe, especially himself, he’s only able to keep functioning through a truly astounding amount of denial, and he covers it all up with a layer of snark and feigned apathy, which he defends aggressively because he’s subconsciously realised that if it breaks he’ll have absolutely nothing left
(maedhros, for the record, is... i’d say more stable, but at a lower point. maglor may interact with the world mostly through cold stares and mocking laughter, but at least his mind is firmly rooted in the present)
(on the other hand, at least maedhros lets himself be aware of what they are and where their road will lead)
which... this doesn’t mean maglor doesn’t try to be kind to the twins, or rein in his worst impulses around them
there’s just so little of him left but the weapon
he stalks through the halls like a portent of death and gets into hours-long screaming matches with maedhros and has definitely killed people in front of the twins
not even as, like, a deliberate attempt to scare them, but because when you solve most of your problems by stabbing them it’s pretty much a given that people who spend a lot of time around you are going to see you do it at least once
and sometimes, he curls up in an empty hallway, and weeps
... suffice it to say i don’t think elwing’s the more preoccupied, or the less mentally ill, parent here
just. in general, the fëanorians aren’t cackling boogeymen, but they’re not particularly nice either
no one has the energy left for that. not these isolated and weary soldiers at the end of a long losing war and the beginning of the end of the world. they don’t really bother to guard the kids against them escaping. where else are they going to go?
the sheer despair that must have been in the fëanorian camp after sirion, the knowledge that the cause cannot be fulfilled, that they are utterly forsaken, that they’re really just waiting to die -
it can’t have been a happy place to grow up in, under the shadow of loss and grief and deeds unrepentable, and the slow march of inevitable defeat
they would have had a better childhood if they stayed in sirion, raised by people who knew how to hope
but that isn’t the childhood they had. and despite everything i’ve said, i don’t think that childhood was an entirely awful one
yeah, see, this is where the other side of my self-inflicted fandom catch-22 comes in. just as much of the pro-kidnap dads stuff comes off as overly saccharine and simplified to me, i find much of the anti-kidnap dads stuff equally simplistic in the opposite direction
the idea that maglor and the fëanorians never meant anything to elros and elrond, that they had no effect on the people they became at all, that it was just a horrible thing that happened when they were children, easily thrown in the rear-view mirror...
that’s even more impossible to me than the idea that life with the fëanorians was 100% fluffy and nice
like, i’ve seen the take that elros and elrond hated the fëanorians from start to finish. they were perfect little sindarin princes, loyal to their people and the memory of doriath, spurning every scrap of kindness offered to them and knowing just what to say to twist the knife into the kinslayers’ wounds
... dude. they were six. hell, given their peredhelness, mentally they could easily have been younger
what six year old has a firm grasp of their ethnic identity? what six year old is fully aware of their place in history? what six year old would understand the politics that led to their situation?
don’t get me wrong, i can see hatred in there. but something else that doesn’t get acknowledged alongside it often enough is the fear
some of the stuff i’ve read feels like it gives the kids too much power in the situation. they’re perfectly happy to talk back to and belittle the people who burned down their hometown and killed everyone they ever knew, like miniature adults who don’t feel threatened at all
and, like, six. i can see them going for insults as a defensive measure, but it is defensive. it’s covering up fear, not coming from secure disdain
(and a lot of those insults sound, again, like things an adult who’s already familiar with the fëanorians would say, not a scared child who’s lost almost everything. why would a six year old raised by sindar and gondolindrim know what the noldolantë is, let alone what it means to maglor?)
(... i’m just ranting about this one fic that’s been ruffling my feathers for five years straight now, aren’t i)
i mean, i write elrond as the world’s angriest teenager, who snipes at maglor pretty much constantly, but the thing about angry teenage elrond is that he’s angry teenage elrond
he’s spent long enough with the fëanorians he has a pretty secure position within the camp, and he knows that maglor won’t hurt him from a decade and change of maglor not, in fact, hurting him
but as a small and terrified child abducted by the monsters his mother had nightmares about? he fluctuated wildly between ‘randomly guessing at things to say that wouldn’t get him killed’ ‘screaming at maglor to go away in words rarely more complicated than that’ 'desperately trying not to do or say anything in the hopes of not being noticed’ and ‘hiding’
(and i don’t think the twins were never in any danger from the fëanorians, either. quite besides the point that before they started orbiting maglor nobody was really sure what to do with them... well, they wouldn’t be the first children of thingol’s line the minions took revenge on)
(fortunately for them, maglor did, in fact, take them under his wing. by this point even their own followers are shit scared of the last two sons of fëanor, nobody’s going to mess with their stuff and risk getting mauled. tactically, it was a pretty good decision for a couple of toddlers)
more to the point, i feel like a child that young, in a situation that horrible, wouldn’t reject any kindness they were offered, any soothing touch in a universe of terror
in a world full of big scary monsters, the best way to survive is to get the biggest scariest monster possible to protect you. that’s how elros rationalises it when they’re, like, eight, mentally, but at the time they were just latching on to the only person around them who seemed to care about them
that’s how it started, on their end. two very young very scared children lost in a neverending nightmare clinging tightly to the lone outstretched pair of hands
as for maglor...
i’ve called mags evil before, but i see that as more of a... technical term? he is evil because he did the murder, he remains evil because he won’t stop doing the murder. hot take: murder bad
but that doesn’t make him, like, a moustache-twirling saturday morning cartoon villain. he is deeply unhappy with the position he’s in and the person he’s become, and he’s always trying not to take that final step over the edge
it’s not that i can’t see a maglor who is abusive or manipulative or who sees the twins more as objects than people. it’s just that that characterisation is one i am profoundly uninterested in. i do occasionally read fic with it, but it never enters my own headcanons
horrible people can do good things!! kinslayers can do good things!! the fallen are capable of humanity!! people can do both good and evil things at the same time, because people are complicated!! maglor is not psychologically incapable of actually taking pity on these kids!!!!
it’s... again, complexity. the fëanorians straddle the line between black and white, which is a lot less sharp in the legendarium than it’s sometimes characterised as. it’s what draws me to their characters so much, why i have so many stupid headcanons about them. pretending they fall firmly on either side of the line is my real fandom pet peeve
and, like, this moment? this sincere connection between a bloodstained warlord and two children who will grow up to be great and kind in equal measure? i may not entirely like the direction the fandom’s taken it recently, but that beat, that relationship, it still gets me
so no, i don’t think elrond and elros’ years with the fëanorians were an endless cavalcade of abuse and misery. i think there was love there, despite the darkness all around them
an old, tired monster, and the two tiny children it protects
maglor never hurts the twins, not ever, not once. his claws are sharp and his fangs are keen, if he so much as swatted them he’d rip them in half. instead he folds down the razor edges of his being, interacting with them ever so carefully. he has nightmares of suddenly tearing into their skin
seriously, the power differential between them is so great, maglor so much as raising his voice would break any trust they have in this horribly dangerous creature. fics where he does corporal punishment always get the side-eye from me
the mood of their relationship is... i find it hard to put into words. melancholy, maybe, like a sunny afternoon a few days before the end of the world. three people who’ve lost so much finding what respite they can in each other as the world slowly crumbles around them
there are times when it feels like the three of them exist in a world of their own, marked out by the edges of the firelight. maglor telling stories of the stars, elros giving relaxed irreverent commentary, elrond getting a few moments to just be, all their troubles kept at bay
they are the last two lights in a world sunk into darkness, the last two living beings he does not on some level hate. he will tear his own heart out before he sees them in pain
he teaches them to ride, he teaches them to read, he gives them everything he still has left. the twins should never have been in this situation, maglor probably isn’t entirely fit to take care of them, but it is what it is, and they take what love they can
(maglor depends on the twins emotionally a bit more than any adult should rely on any child. he’s still very much the caretaker in their relationship, but that relationship is the only one he has left that’s not stained by a century of rage and grief. he’s obsessed with them, maedhros tells him frequently. maglor’s standard response to this is to try to gouge maedhros’ eyes out)
(that particular darker side to their relationship, where maglor’s attachment to the twins turns into a desperate possessiveness - that’s not something i think i’ve ever seen in fic. which is a shame, it feels much closer to my own characterisation than the standard ways this relationship gets maleficised. darker, in a different way than usual. horribly compelling in its plausibility)
however you want to read it, i don’t think you can deny this is a relationship that defines elrond and elros’ childhood. they were raised in the woods by a pack of kinslayers, the text is quite clear on this
but i’ve seen a lot of talk about how elros and elrond are only sirion’s children. they are completely 100% sindarin, they love and forgive eärendil and elwing thoroughly and without question, they identify with doriath over - even gondolin, let alone tirion. the fëanorians - the people who raised them - had zero effect on the people they grew into and the selves they created
and that, more than anything else, i find utterly unbelievable
look, i get what this is a reaction to. a lot of the kidnap dads stuff paints the fëanorians as elrond and elros’ ‘real’ family, and i’ve already talked about what i think of the idea that maglor-and-possibly-also-maedhros were better parents than eärendil and elwing. i think it’s reductive and overly optimistic and just a little too neat
but to say instead that elrond and elros held no great love in their hearts for maglor, no lingering affinity with the fëanorians, no influence on their identity from the people they grew up around, none at all? that after it happened they just left it behind and resumed being the same people they were in sirion?
that strikes me as just as much an oversimplification. it sands down all the potential rough edges of their identity, all that inconvenient complexity that stops them from fitting into any well-defined box, and replaces it with a nice safe simple self-conception i find just as flat and boring as declaring them 100% fëanorian
we can quibble over who they call ‘father’ (i personally find that whole debate kinda petty) but denying that it was actually maglor who was the closest thing they knew to a parent for most of their childhoods, and that that would, in fact, affect the way they thought of themselves and their family, elides so many interesting possibilities out of existence
(i’m not even going to get into the most braindead take i have ever heard on the subject, namely that because their time with the fëanorians was such a small fraction of elrond’s total lifespan it was like being kidnapped for two weeks as a toddler and had no greater significance than that. do you not understand what childhood is????)
like, i tend to think of elrond as a child as being very loudly not-a-fëanorian. elros is more willing to go with the flow - hey, if the creepy kinslayer wants kids, elros is happy to play into that in order to not be murdered - but elrond is very firm that he’s not happy to be here and he doesn’t belong with them
(this is after they get over their initial terror, of course, when they’ve realised they won’t be fed to the orcs for the tiniest slight. even so, elrond only really gets shirty about it around people he’s comfortable with, whose reactions he can reasonably guess at. naturally, the first person he does it to is maglor)
elros calls maglor their father exactly once, when they’re... maybe early preteens? this is because elrond hears him do it and immediately loses his shit. they have a dad, elrond says, in tears, and a mum, and any day now their real parents are going to come to pick them up and take them home
... right?
it gets harder to believe as the years roll on, as their memories of sirion fade, as they find their own places within the host, as maglor watches over them as they grow. elrond still mentally sets himself apart from the fëanorians, but it’s more of an effort every year. life in the fëanorian camp is the only one he’s ever really known. he can barely remember his mother’s voice
then the war of wrath starts, and the fëanorian host drifts closer to the army of valinor, and the twins come into contact with non-fëanorians for the first time in forever, and it becomes clear just how obviously fëanorian elrond is. he always insisted he wasn’t like the kinslayers at all, but he dresses like them, talks like them, fights like them
the myth cycles the edain tell are almost completely unfamiliar to him, he barely remembers the shape of the songs of lost doriath. even these sarcastic commentary and subversive reinterpretations he made of maglor’s stories - those were still maglor’s stories! he’s been trying to guess at the person he was meant to be, but it’s growing nightmarishly blatant how little elrond ever knew about him
instead, the people he was born to are as alien to him as the orcs of morgoth. he is a fëanorian, through and through
... yeah, elrond (and/or elros) having an absolutely massive identity crisis upon being reintroduced to his quote-unquote ‘true kin’ is another angle i’d love to see in fic that i don’t think i’ve ever come across. all those potential grey areas around who they are and who they’re supposed to be sound utterly fascinating, and i think it’s the complexity i hate to see elided over the most
i really, really doubt they could effortlessly slot back into being eärendil and elwing’s children. not when they’ve been surrounded by, lived alongside, been raised by the people who were supposed to enemies for most of their lives
they just don’t fit into that box any more. they can’t
speaking of eärendil and elwing, while i do agree that they both (especially elwing) get a lot more flak than they deserve, i don’t agree that therefore elrond and elros were never the slightest bit mad at them and fully forgave them for everything with no reservations
because, well, they were left behind. elwing had no other choice, but they were still left behind; it led to the world being saved, but they were still left behind. all the best intentions in the universe don’t erase the weeks and months and years of waiting, of a hope that grew thinner and frailer until it finally quietly broke
that’s a real hurt, and a real grievance. even if the twins rationally understand that their parents were making the best out of their terrible situation, you can’t logic away emotions like that. it’s perfectly possible for them to know they have no reason to resent eärendil or elwing, and yet still harbour that bitterness and pain
(i did write a thing once where elrond loudly rejects eärendil as his father in favour of maglor, but something i didn’t add in that i probably should have is that elrond later regretted doing that)
(not like, several centuries later, when he’d grown old and wise. two hours later, when he’d calmed down. but he was still legitimately angry at eärendil, because the one thing angry teenage elrond was not lacking in was reasons to be mad at the adults around him, and before he could figure out if he had anything less furious to say the hosts of the valar left middle-earth behind)
(it’s another element to the tragedy of the whole thing. in that particular story, which is mostly aiming for maximum pain, the only thing elrond’s birth parents know about their son for thousands of years is that he hates them)
(and he doesn’t, not really. you can’t hate someone you’ve never known)
not that i think they couldn’t ever make up with their parents! fics where elrond and his birth parents work past all the things that lie between them and form a functional familial bond despite it all give me life. i just don’t like the idea that there’s nothing difficult for them to work past
i don’t like the idea that elrond and elros would naturally, effortlessly identify with the mother they last saw when they were six and the people they only vaguely remember. i can see them doing it as a political move, i can see them going for it as a deliberate personal choice, but i can’t seeing it being immediate and automatic and easy
no matter how great a pair of heroes eärendil and elwing are, that doesn’t change the fact that to elrond and elros, they’re at most a few scattered memories and a collection of far-off stories. and so long as the twins stay in middle-earth, they’re never going to draw any closer
compared to the dynamic, multifaceted, personal, and deep bonds they have with the fëanorians - who, and i know i keep saying this but i think it gets tossed aside way more casually than it should, are the people who actually raised them, their birth parents must feel like a distant idea
and that’s why i can never buy interpretations of elrond as 100% sindarin, a pure son of doriath, with no messy grey areas or awkward jagged edges to his identity. given everything we know about his life, it seems almost cartoonishly simplistic
honestly it seems like a narrative a bunch of old doriathrin nobles trying to manouevre elrond into being high king of the sindar or something would propagate. it's neat and nice and tidy, something that’d be much more convenient for everyone if elrond did feel that way
but i just don’t see how he can. this narrative is easy and simple in a way real people never are, it ignores all the forces pulling him apart. elrond being uncomplicatedly sindarin with the life he lives and the people he's close to - that doesn’t make any sense to me
which isn’t to say i think he’s 100% noldorin, from either a gondolindrim or a fëanorian perspective. (i find it a little more believable, given, again, who he grew up around and who he hangs out with, but it’s still a bit too reductive for my tastes.) it’s also not to say i couldn’t believe an elrond who made an active choice to emphasise his sindarin heritage
it’s not how i think of him, but it works. i don’t have a problem with other people interpreting the complexities of the twins’ identities differently
i just have a problem with people acting like it doesn’t exist
in general i think there’s a lot untapped potential that gets left behind when you declare the twins, separately or together, as All One Thing
they’re descended from half the noble houses of beleriand, and they have deep personal ties to most of the rest. they belong to all of the free peoples even the dwarves, somehow, probably and i feel like that was kind of the old man’s point? so many peoples meet in them, to say they wholly belong to any one species is probably an oversimplification
they sit at a crossroads of potential identities, and rather than narrowing down their worldviews to one single path, they take the hard road and choose all of them. that’s what you need to do, if you want to change the world
and, to bring this back to my ostensible topic, in my estimation at least this mélange of possible selves does include them as fëanorians! it’s not overpowering, but it’s certainly there, and the adults they grow into long after they’ve left the host still bear influence from their childhood
nothing super obvious, nothing that wouldn’t stand out if you didn’t know what to look for, but there’s something almost incandescent in how fiercely elros reaches out for his dreams
there’s something almost defiant in elrond’s drive to be as kind as summer
as for who they publically claim as their family... honestly, it depends. while it’s usually more tactically prudent for elros to connect himself to his various human ancestors, on occasion he does find a use for his free in with the elf mafia, and elrond, code switcher par excellence, is famously the son of whoever is most politically convenient at the moment, which is rarely, but not never, maglor
(in the privacy of their own minds, well, eärendil and elwing may have been the parents elros was supposed to have, but maglor was the parent he actually had, and elros doesn’t particularly care to mope over what might have been. elrond, for his part, figures that after all the shit maglor has put him through, the least that bastard owes him is a father)
but honestly? i think before any of their mountain of identities, before thinking of themselves as sindarin or gondolindel or hadorian or haladin or fëanorian or anything, elrond and elros identify as themselves
they are peredhil, they are númenóreans, they are whoever they make themselves to be. that’s how elrond finally resolved his identity, figured out who he was and found something past the pain and the rage
he wasn’t doriathrin, or gondolindrin, or falathrin, or fëanorian, or whatever else. he was elrond, no more and no less
and that person, elrond, could be whatever he chose to be
... elros came to a similar conclusion, with much less sturm und drang that he’s willing to admit. being able to go ‘hey, i can’t possibly be biased towards any one of your cultures, because i’m descended from all of you and i was raised by murderelves’ makes it a lot easier to unite people around your personal banner, turns out
the stories other people tried to force on them shattered into pieces, and the peredhel twins were free to shape themselves into anything they could dream of
and as the new world struggles alive, these lost children of an Age of death begin to bloom into their full glorious selves -
i just. i love the poetry of that. despite every single shadow that hangs over their past, despite all the clashing notes pulling them apart, they harmonise it all into a greater, kinder theme, determined to make their world a better place in whatever way they can
they fail, of course, but so do all things. the inevitable march of entropy doesn’t diminish the long millennia they (and their descendants) held onto the light
and their growing up in the fëanorian host definitely had a huge effect on the noble lords they became. you can see it in elros’ loud ambition to create a land of happiness and hope, elrond’s quiet resolve to heal all the hurts inflicted by this marred reality
it wasn’t a perfect time by any means, but neither was it a nightmare. it was what it was, a desperate existence at the edge of a knife where, nevertheless, they were loved
even after years upon decades upon centuries have passed, it’s hard for the wise king and the honourable sage to separate out and identify all the conflicting emotions swirling around their childhood. they never knew eärendil or elwing, true, but they also never really knew maglor
not as equals, not as adults, not as people who could truly understand him. he disappeared into the fog of history, leaving only childhood memories of razor-sharp, gentle hands
it’s messy and it’s complicated and getting any real closure would be like shoving their way through a thornbush with bare hands even if elrond could find the shithead, and yet at the core of it all, there is light. not the brightest of lights, maybe, but an enduring one
that contrast, above all, that note of warmth amidst the shadows, is what fascinates me so much about their relationship. three screwed up people in a screwed up world, finding a little peace with each other
and the fact that somehow, it does have a good ending - the children grow up magnificent and compassionate and just, they become exemplars of all their peoples, lodestars of the new world born out of the ashes of the old - that makes it seem to me like this relationship must have contained some fragment of happiness
but, fuck, all the darkness that surrounds that love, all the tangled-up emotions its existence necessitates, all the prefabricated self-identities it can never slot into - nothing about it is simple, nothing about it is easy, and i find that utterly enthralling. especially how, despite everything, that flickering light never goes out
well, i don’t think it does, anyway. my take on this relationship is both complicated enough no one else ever quite gets it right and well-defined enough every single ‘error’ in other people’s interpretations sticks out like a kinslayer in rivendell
it is an entirely self-inflicted problem, i will admit. other people are allowed to interpret those complexities differently from me, and it’s entirely my own fault i lack the :waves hands around nebulously: to write my own hypothetical fic on the subject at a pace faster than glacial
still, though. i do wish there was more fic out there that engaged with these complexities. a lot of the common fandom interpretations of this relationship just sweep it all away
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sylverstorms · 3 years
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Cassandra x Maiden----Anonymity Ch.5 (NSFW!)
Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4
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'Cassandra's favorite', the other maids call you.
You can't tell if they mean it as a good or a bad thing. Hell, you can't even tell which of the two it really is.
Being her 'favorite' does not make you immune to harm in any way; bruises litter your shoulders and sides from when she grabs you too forcefully and cuts from her nails sting at your neck and stomach, renewed each time she comes to take a kiss.
None of that existed back when you were something of zero interest to her. On the other hand, she's told you several times you're 'a thing of beauty' --her thing of beauty-- and she won't let anything ruin a natural piece of art.
If you know anything about Cassandra, it is that she takes art very seriously. Your interpretation of the word greatly varies from hers, you're sure, but it doesn't change the fact she won't easily raise a sickle on you.
Cassandra won't break you. She won't let Daniela do so, either. Bela doesn't even care to hurt you. It means you're safe for now...
Unless Lady Dimitrescu decides you're best taken away from her daughter. Permanently. You don't dare meet her eyes, but you can feel them on you, scrutinizing, every night at dinner.
You're pretty sure she knows.
The thought sits heavy in your mind while you're cleaning bloodied steps off a corridor at three in the small hours of the morning, along with another maid. Adella is a quiet and hardworking one; the two of you make a good team and you know you'll be done in record time.
But it only takes a single moment for everything to go wrong.
Adella is hastily walking back to you with a bucket of fresh water in hand when you hear a different set of steps approach from the side. You make to warn her, but it's already too late.
The collision happens at the turn where the two passageways meet. As soon as you see black robes dripping wet you pray to whichever God will listen for mercy.
Because Cassandra has not been in a good mood all night and she is not the understanding type regardless.
Adella gasps and shakingly backs away, a waterfall of apologies spilling from her lips. Cassandra rolls her neck and draws her sickle, advancing on her slowly. She looks terrifying.
"Don't move now." she orders.
And you just- can't watch this. You don't know why, but the realization you cannot hits you like a speeding truck. You can't stand there while the the woman you frequently kiss cuts away at a girl you know is as good and compassionate as a human under your circumstances can possibly get.
You react.
Before you can even think how impossibly stupid you're being, you drop the mop in your hands and dash forward, crashing into Cassandra's form. Your right arm wraps around her waist and your left grips at her wrist like a vice. Your heart is pounding. You don't even know what you're saying;
"Cassandra, no! Please. Don't." Cold and rigid as she is, it may as well be a statue you're holding. "Cassandra, stop. Please." Once impulse dies down, you realize you've just signed your death wish for two seconds of playing hero.
And you thought you were smarter than that. Ha. But maybe, just maybe, part of you wants to die, so long as it's quick and painless.
With Cassandra, though, you doubt it. Especially with how lethal she sounds when she says:
"You. Disappear." You hear, rather than see, Adella scurrying off for her life. "As for you..."
You only register a blur, nausea, cold nails piercing at your neck, over already existing marks. You are shoved into the nearest wall so powerfully you can't breathe for all of ten seconds. It's a wonder you don't hear any cracks from within your body.
Cassandra is on you, her fingers harsh on your chin and breath chilly on your lips. "Good pets don't bark against their own masters. What made you so bold, hm?"
You don't answer, too busy summoning your mental strength for what comes next. The way her eyes and the lines of her pretty face have hardened, she looks nothing like the flirty girl who comes to steal kisses from you at random times during the night.
"Maybe I've been too nice to you. The first time you call my name and it's for some other maid?"
She looks like she wants to let out a bitter laugh, break something and slice you into stripes simultaneously. And then you realize; Cassandra is jealous.
It doesn't get any worse than that.
"Maybe I should make sure you never say anything again." The corner of her lips curls up in dark amusement as she talks. "You don't talk much, anyway."
Well. She did say she wouldn't let anyone ruin your looks. Never promised anything about what's on the inside.
You're shaking, even if her grasp doesn't leave much room to do so. Your brain is restlessly trying to come up with something to get you out of this mess-
"I'm of way more use to you with my tongue intact." you somehow manage to speak without stuttering. It makes you wonder where the hell this confidence came from.
Cassandra stills for a moment. Her grip eases the slightest amount, probably from surprise.
You wonder what the hell you're even doing, yourself, when you bring your hands to her sides and lean in, to the curve of her nice jawline. You've never kissed her neck before, but you remember from the times you've given her a massage that she's very sensitive around it.
Cautiously, you press your mouth to the soft spot under her ear.
She smells so good and her skin feels so smooth you're not exactly forcing yourself to kiss her. If you're going to be mutilated anyway, the part of you that must be severely messed up muses, you may as well take some pleasure for yourself beforehand. Who knows, it may change her mind along the way.
So you lick her there and suck over her faint pulse. You don't get any stimuli from her, at first.
Until her hand trails from your shoulder to your nape, urging you harder against her. It's the green light to keep going.
You put all your skill into it as you lavish her neck and collarbones with open-mouthed kisses. She's loose and moaning low in her throat now.
You can't tell why, but the sound echoes right though your adrenaline-induced system, tickles down your spinal cord to pool low in your stomach. You either had a kink for danger you never knew of, or you developed one in the castle.
Whatever the case, your fingers are working on the buttons of her outfit and she doesn't seem like stopping you has even crossed her mind.
When the robes barely hang onto her shoulders, Cassandra maneuvers you to the closest room, shuts the door and presses you against it. Hard. Your lips slide together hungrily. You taste wine on her tongue.
At this point, your hands are the only thing supporting her outfit on her. She looks too fucking sexy for words like this, half-undressed, lipstick smeared, so turned on and ready for you. But you also want to see more of her, so you let the black fabric drop.
She's getting impatient, though. Being more vocal, tugging your hand to the apex of her legs.
"Cassandra." you moan when you push the midnight lace of her panties aside and touch her. She's so wet.
Her mouth falls open in a soundless gasp, brows drawn softly. "Oh, you're lucky I like my name on your lips." she says, breathless.
You did start this trying to prove to her how useful your tongue can be attached to your body, however... so it's only fair that's how you finish it.
Finish her.
Cassandra looks dazed and confused when you kneel in front of her, but it's quickly replaced with a broken moan when you take her into your mouth. You revel in every single gasp you coax out of her, every minuscule shake of her perfect thighs.
She bites into her own hand when she reaches her peak, nails leaving four parallel marks on the wall.
You're gentlewomanly enough to pull her outfit up for her while she's coming down from her high. Your gaze takes its sweet time admiring the contours of her chest as you button it closed. She really is the most attractive girl you've ever seen, if you somehow don't take into consideration her body count.
"Good?" you ask when she opens her pretty eyes to look at you.
"It's not cute to be smug, plaything." Cassandra makes a soft grimace at you, though you can see the lazy, satisfied smile tugging at the corner of her lip. "But. I suppose your tongue has its uses to me, after all."
You gently push off the door to let her exit at her leisure. The movement makes you realize you won't really be able to move tomorrow, with how sore you already are.
To your surprise, Cassandra takes a moment longer in the room.
She turns back to you and raises her hands to your torso, then carefully adjusts your wrinkled shirt. Her long fingers smooth over the imperfections she caused...
And you don't know why after everything the two of you just did, it's this that feels the most intimate.
The same digits brush over your throat as she pulls away.
By the time your mind starts working right again, Cassandra is already gone. Absently, you trace over the weeping scratches on your neck.
-
-
Later, at the main hall of the castle...
"Oh, boo, look who's late again." Daniela rolls her eyes at Cassandra's fashionably delayed arrival.
"Surprise, surprise." Bela smirks, casually leaned against the side of the fireplace.
"Are you two done being insufferable or should I come by later?" Cassandra asks.
"And scar our ears and minds with another round of your 'oh's and 'ah's, sister? I think not." Daniela comments.
Bela raises an eyebrow in amusement. "Had a nice time?"
"You two have very active imaginations, you know? Tells a lot about you." Cassandra chuckles. "She was just giving me a massage. But do go on. Be thirsty. I can wait."
Daniela and Bela share a look, thrown off their game by the nonchalance.
Cassandra hides a smirk under her hood and steps out first, into the peerless dark.
334 notes · View notes
citrinesparkles · 3 years
Text
doctor todd.
jason todd x gender neutral vigilante!reader. 1,875 words. notes: requested by @jason-redhood as part of my hundred followers celebration! this got a lot longer than i intended, oopsies. thanks for requesting- hope you enjoy! warnings: tending wounds, mentions of food.
"y'know, lurking outside somebody's window is a good way to get yourself shot," jason called over his shoulder.
"i'll keep that in mind," you said, voice strained enough to shoot dread into his veins and draw his attention completely away from his work.
he set the gun he had been cleaning on the table and twisted around to find you gingerly sliding through the open window.
"hey," you mumbled, giving him a weak wave after your boots hit the floor. "sorry for not calling, i just..."
you were backlit, the glow of the city making it impossible to see your features from the dining area- but your posture alone was enough to have him shoving his chair back and crossing his apartment.
"how bad?" he asked, stopping a few steps back, now able to make out the tears in your suit and the bruises around your mask.
"pretty sure i sprained my wrist, and there's a poorly-bandaged gash on my leg, but otherwise i'm peachy."
"how bad's the leg?"
"i'm... not sure. bad enough that i think i need your help." you patted the windowsill with a gloved hand. "obviously."
he nodded and slid to your good side, gently resting a hand on your shoulder. "okay. c'mon, my stuff's in the bathroom."
-
"here." he handed you a pair of shorts and a large tank top. "change into this so i can get to the wounds, okay? i'll be right out here if you need anything."
-
"you're good!" you called.
he nudged the bathroom door back open and scooped your uniform up from the floor, carefully putting it in a canvas bag and tying the handles together before setting it in the tub to deal with later. "alright," he sighed, turning back to face you.
his clothes looked way too right on you, he realized, a wave of emotion he would vehemently deny surging through his chest and pushing heat to his neck and cheeks.
"alright?"
"okay. alright. uh-" he jerked a thumb at the counter- "up here, i guess, so i can see your leg."
you propped one foot on the toilet lid and braced your good hand against his shoulder, his hands instinctively coming up to hover around your waist as you pushed yourself up and settled next to the sink.
the grateful smile you gave him was enough to tug his lips into a smile of his own.
"you're up, doctor todd," you teased.
he stepped forward with a halfhearted eyeroll, fingers brushing the cloth tied hastily around your leg. "can i take this off?"
"go ahead."
he tugged gently at the knot, wincing when you inhaled sharply. "sorry."
the scrap fell away, revealing dried blood and an open wound on the outside of your thigh.
"yeesh, that is nasty," he said.
you scoffed lightly. "gee, thanks."
"hey, if you wanted a nice doctor, you probably should have gone somewhere else." he shifted to the side, grabbing a clean cloth and bottle of alcohol. "fair warning, you're really not gonna like me here in a minute."
your quick "i seriously doubt that." was greeted with a grin that felt a little too fond for his liking.
he told himself it was for your benefit.
...yeah, that sounded good.
he could live with that.
-
he made quick work of cleaning the gash, doing his best to distract you by making stupid small talk about the horrible movie he'd sat through that morning because the tv remote had been out of reach and the mediocre new coffee shop with dry blueberry muffins.
"was the coffee okay, at least?"
"okay, yeah, but not 'five-dollars-fifty' okay. if i hadn't been falling asleep in line i probably would have left when i saw the price."
"there's a nice one up by my place, they make the best blueberry muffins ever."
he hummed. "i'll keep that in mind, next time i'm over that way." he leaned back, studying your cut. "i think stitches would probably be smart."
you groaned. "of course they would."
"i'm okay to do them- i do them on myself- but if you want i can give you a lift to a hospital or something."
"no. if you can, i want you to do them. i trust you."
he sat with that for a minute, searching your face for any hesitation. when he found none, he nodded. "okay."
-
as you both expected, it sucked.
to make things worse, he was rapidly running out of mindless things to talk about.
how many times could two people really argue about pizza toppings before it got old?
-
"alright, done."
"holy shit, finally." you slumped back, leaning on your good hand for a moment before your head snapped back up. "no, not like- i meant thank you, you did great, i'm not being an ingrate-"
"i know, relax." he nudged your knee with a goofy smile. "here, gimme your wrist."
you pouted (which, yes, that was also adorable, much to his dismay), carefully stretching your bad arm out.
he took your hand gently, scooping it up in one of his and bracing your forearm up with his other. "it's actually not too bad, considering you hit hard enough to tear your glove. i'm gonna clean the scrapes here up, though, okay?"
"do i really get a choice?"
"it's your body, so, yeah."
you sighed dramatically. "fine, if you insist. go ahead, clean my wounds for me."
-
he was quiet this time, focusing intently on removing bits of dirt and stuff from your raw palm with a set of tweezers.
trying to ignore the way your eyes seemed to linger on him now that he was looking down.
he set the tweezers aside, glancing up at you to find you smiling at him thoughtfully, and dropped his gaze just as quickly as he had lifted it. "what, you enjoying making me do all the work?"
"you could say that, yeah."
he scoffed. "well, you're going to enjoy it a lot less in a second. time for the alcohol again."
"ugh."
-
he managed to dig up an old wrist brace in the back of his sock drawer. a little big for you, but it would work for now, he figured.
"may i?"
you nodded and held your arm back out for him to loop the brace over your thumb and tuck the velcro strap under and around, pulling it snug against your skin before sticking it to itself.
-
"last one, tough stuff." he pointed at your cheek, where a small patch of dried blood stained your skin. "ready?'
you nodded tiredly. "let's just get this over with. this counter isn't as comfortable as it looks."
he chuckled, dampening the softest cloth he had and wringing it out. "sorry, i didn't think i needed to get an apartment with counter cushions." he raised his left hand up, hovering an inch or so below your chin. "uh, can i..?"
your eyes widened, glancing at his hand. "oh, uh, sure. yeah."
he moved slowly, raising it to cup your chin softly with his middle and forefinger on one side and thumb on the other. "this okay?"
"mhm." your eyes slid shut and he could almost believe that you sank into his touch.
if it wasn't absolutely insane, anyway. his touch wasn't exactly the kind people sank into- much less people like you. people that good, that caring, that stunning? yeah, no.
he tilted your head to the side slightly, rubbing gentle circles across your cheekbone with the cloth and watching as the blood faded.
"so, who did this?" he asked softly, casually.
apparently not casually enough, though, because you snorted at him. "why, you think you need to go avenge me? defend my honor or something?"
"no! i'm just curious. just... making conversation."
your eyes opened, amusement dancing in them and threatening to hypnotize him. "good. i shouldn't have to tell you who won that fight, jay."
"well, i mean, you are missing a chunk of your thigh."
"aw, is the big bad vigilante worried about lil old me?"
he squeezed your face gently, pushing your cheeks up and forward into a goofy fish face. "it's rude to tease the guy tending to your wounds, babe."
he definitely didn't imagine your breath hitching. "babe, huh?" you asked playfully.
"shut up," he grumbled. "don't make me regret helping."
-
"alright, looks like that's the last scrape. you're all cleaned up."
"thanks, jason." you smiled up at him, soft and warm and genuine. "i really appreciate this."
"yeah, yeah." he squeezed your jaw again. "try not to make it a habit."
"mhm." a moment passed quietly before you spoke quietly. "so, you gonna do something here, or can i have my face back?"
he froze.
your mouth- which he was really trying not to look at- shifted into a confident smirk, a challenge written clearly in the angle of your lips.
your eyes, bright under the harsh lighting, told a different story. one of vulnerability, and want, and something close to fear.
"do you want me to?" his voice was hoarser than he'd intended, and he swore you could hear his heartbeat echoing in it.
your gaze dipped to his lips. "would it make everything super weird?"
"you just came crawling through my window in the middle of the night in a mask and kevlar. i think things are already weird."
he felt your hum under his fingers. "then why not?"
"do you really want me to answer that?"
"jason, will you please just kiss me already?"
"well, you did say please." he leaned in slowly, giving you every opportunity to slip away or yell 'sike!'
all you did was bring your good hand up to his collar and pull him towards you.
your lips were soft and gentle, and the way they pulled upwards slightly when his hand slid from your jaw to cup your cheek was something he'd be thinking about for weeks.
when he eventually pulled back, it took him a moment to open his eyes. he was half convinced that if he did, it would be to his bedroom ceiling, the past half an hour all a dream.
instead, he found your fond gaze.
"finally."
he let out a huff of laughter, thumb running over your cheek. "you should stay here tonight."
"w-"
"not like that," he clarified quickly. "you have stitches, you shouldn't go leaping across rooftops tonight. i can take the couch."
"hm." you smoothed out his shirt collar, the barely-there brush of your fingers against his shoulder almost tugging a whine out of him. "or i can take the couch, and then you can take me home in the morning and let me treat you to an actual blueberry muffin."
"are you asking me out?" it was a teasing comment, paired with a tiny smirk meant to fluster you.
but it was also a reality check.
you seemed to catch the second meaning. "yeah, i am. would you, please, let me take you out on a date?"
"i'll have to check my calenda-"
"you're so full of it."
"yeah, probably."
"is that a yes?"
he laughed, bringing his other hand up to squeeze your knee. "yeah, i can let you take me on a date. i could use a good muffin."
351 notes · View notes
ncssian · 3 years
Text
A Favor: Part Twenty
Nessian Modern AU
Masterlist
a/n: sorry for the wait yall this month really kicked my ass,, but also we reached part 20!!
tw infertility discussion
***
Gwyn: isn’t he beautiful <3
In the freezing February air outside the tea house, Nesta clicks on the picture attached to Gwyn’s text. It’s a distant shot of a man in his mid-thirties hunched over a library desk while working, unaware that there’s a camera on him. She’ll give it to Gwyn, though—he is a little handsome.
Emerie: the stalker levels are through the roof, gwyneth. seek help.
Gwyn: no i’m gonna marry him
Nesta doesn’t know whether to laugh or be concerned, but she types out a brief response before her thumbs fall off from the cold: Will give my opinion on him later. Got to go.
Gwyn’s crush will have to wait, Nesta thinks as she finally puts her phone away and pushes her way inside the exquisite tea house. Immediately, blasting heat thaws her frozen fingers and toes, and farther inside she spots the table she reserved for three. Right now, only one person sits at it.
Nesta grits her teeth and approaches the round table, heels clicking softly on the parquet floors. Elain doesn’t look up from the menu she’s reading. “This place would be nicer to visit in the spring,” is her only acknowledgment of Nesta.
“I like the winter,” Nesta answers simply, taking her seat across from Elain. She likes how the ice creeps over the garden outside until everything looks frozen in time, and she likes how the colorful flowers and trees become dulled by white snow. Not that her sister would understand or care.
“Of course you do,” Elain mutters, setting down the menu with all the careful elegance of a debutante. “I’m only here for Feyre, anyway.”
It almost saddens Nesta that she doesn’t feel hurt or offense at the words. She thought she would care more about Elain’s opinion than she actually does. “Where is Feyre, then?” she says, looking pointedly at the empty seat between them. “I thought she was coming with you.”
“I’m right here,” a breathless voice says, accompanied by the sound of hurried footsteps. Feyre appears, looking flushed from exertion and the cold. She sets her bag down and joins them at the table, scooting her seat all the way in. “Sorry I’m late. What did I miss?”
“Nothing,” Nesta bites. “I was just about to order.”
“So was I.” Elain smiles breezily.
Feyre glances between the two of them, clear concern on her face, but she covers it up and says, “I’m so glad we’re doing this.”
It was Feyre’s idea, of course. After Nesta told her off for never being interested in what she wanted to do, Feyre actually listened. She asked if Nesta wanted to hang out, and then let Nesta fill in the rest of the details on her own terms.
Which brings them to the tea house. Unfortunately for her sisters, however, Nesta doesn’t really know where to go from ordering tea and biscuits.
“How is school going?” Feyre asks her after their drinks arrive.
Nesta sips from her tea, already bored. “It’s been fifteen minutes and you have yet to say anything of substance, Feyre. It makes me miss being alone with Elain and her mood.”
Feyre looks taken aback, and Elain levels a glare at Nesta. An unsurprised, of course you have to ruin everything like this glare.
So Nesta clarifies, “That wasn’t an attack. I just hoped that after driving out here, I would get something better than shallow small talk.”
“And how do you know it was shallow?” Elain steps in harshly. “How do you know she isn’t actually interested in how you’re doing at school?”
Nesta slides blunt blue eyes to Feyre. “If that’s the case, then I commend you. Personally, I wouldn’t give a shit if I was in your position.”
To her surprise, Feyre snorts. She looks resigned when she says, “No, you’re right. I don’t care about what’s going on at school, not if you don’t. What would you rather we talk about then, Nesta?”
Without hesitation, Nesta says, “Ask me something you really care to hear the answer to.”
Elain shuts her mouth and sits back at that. Feyre twists her lips, thinking her next words over carefully. “How is your therapy going?” she finally asks in a cautious tone. “What do you talk about there?”
Remembering that she’s in a formal setting, Nesta stops herself from crossing her arms. She settles on wrapping her fingers delicately around her teacup instead. “We talk about whatever I feel like talking about,” she answers honestly. Although lately her conversations with Lana feel more restrained than usual.
“And what’s that?” Feyre urges.
Nesta shrugs, fitting apathy onto her face like an old mask. “Recently? Childbearing.” But it isn’t her favorite topic of discussion, not at all.
“You’re pregnant?” Elain jumps in, leading Nesta to throw her an unamused look.
“No, idiot,” she says. “My therapist just has the idea that if I end up being infertile it’ll screw me up, mentally and emotionally and whatever. She thinks I should deal with that baggage now instead of saving it for later.” She rolls her eyes thinking about it. How many times does she have to repeat that she doesn’t care about her body’s reproductive abilities until Lana gets it?
Feyre chuckles, confused. “Why would you be infertile?”
Nesta forgot—she didn’t want her sisters knowing anything that has to do with her health. She even made Cassian keep her doctor visits secret from Feyre. But that was months ago, and the sisters are… not exactly in a better place now, but looking for the way there. Nesta thinks she can tell them without any severe regrets. “I have endometriosis.”
When she’s met with silence, she adds, “You know, with the tissue growing on my ovaries and stuff. It might affect all the babies I don’t care to have in the future.”
Elain is the first to speak. “You always wanted to be a mother.” Her voice is soft, almost mourning. It irritates the hell out of Nesta.
“No, I didn’t,” she snaps back.
“You did,” Elain insists. Feyre still hasn’t said anything. “You took care of our cat, Mittens, until the day she died. You taught Feyre her alphabet. You raised me when Mama and Papa were too busy to do it. You never carried dolls around in strollers or anything, but you loved being a mother.”
“I don’t remember any of this,” Feyre says, blinking. “I’m sorry, can we go back to the endometriosis part?”
Nesta sips from her tea, the bitter taste a welcome distraction from Elain’s words. “What about it?”
“How long have you known?” Feyre demands.
“It isn’t cancer. And I’m getting treated, obviously. I’m fine.”
“That doesn’t answer my question.”
Nesta sighs, setting her cup down. “October. Cassian made me go to the doctor because he was worried about my periods, we had a big fight about health insurance, and now I use my salary from your boyfriend to afford medication so I don’t feel like dying every month. Is that everything you wanted to hear?”
Feyre only stares at her, for once revealing no emotion. “I keep forgetting,” she says finally, “that we’re not at a place to share things like that with each other. I keep being surprised every time I realize how much of your life you keep from us.”
“I don’t,” Elain huffs under her breath while she tears a croissant in half.
Nesta is still watching Feyre. “You remember how bad my cycles were? I would cry loud enough at night to wake the house.”
Feyre flinches at the memory, and Elain goes still.
“But no one ever woke up,” Nesta says. They never talked about it before, and she has no desire to keep speaking about it now. If they start to tally all the hurts they’ve dealt to each other, Nesta fears they’ll be here for hours. Worse, she fears she will lose.
She reaches for a lavender macaron and delicately pulls it apart, studying the cream filling inside. “Did you know they make these using the lavender flowers from the garden outside?”
“I hate lavender,” Elain says.
Spying her chance to shift the subject off herself, Nesta goes for it. “Because Azriel smells like lavender?” She pushes one half of the dainty cookie past her lips, chewing. “It’s an interesting cologne choice, I agree.”
“Wait, what are we talking about now?” Feyre looks around, unaware that they’ve moved onto another topic.
Elain’s innocent brown eyes turn into daggers pointed at Nesta, betrayal written across her face. Nesta feels no pity for her—especially not if they’re going to sit around judging each other for keeping secrets.
Feyre’s eyes widen and she turns to Elain. “Is it about your,” she lowers her voice and whispers, “crush?”
Nesta raises a skeptical brow. She doubts whatever Az and Elain have stops at just a crush.
“No, it’s not,” Elain answers determinedly. “God, do you have to bring men into everything, Nesta?”
“I think you’re projecting.”
“Quit it,” Feyre snaps at the both of them. “Or I’ll grab my things and leave.”
Do it, Nesta almost dares. But she has a feeling that Feyre means it, that she won’t submit to being taunted, so Nesta reins the words back from the tip of her tongue. After all, this tea is expensive.
The sisters take a moment to settle, and Feyre is the one to restart the conversation. “Either way,” she tells Nesta, “it looks like counseling is going really well for you. I’m glad.”
“Yeah, it really gives your skin a certain glow,” Elain drawls.
Nesta doesn’t rise to meet her sarcasm. In all seriousness, Elain and Feyre could probably use a therapist themselves. It might make Nesta’s interactions with them less headache-inducing.
“You should visit one day,” she throws the suggestion out without thinking.
“What, like a therapy session?” Feyre says.
Realizing the implications of her terrible idea, Nesta forces herself not to backpedal. “Yes,” she makes herself grit out. “If you’re interested, that is.”
Elain and Feyre share a glance of hesitation and concern. It’s a glance that grates on Nesta’s nerves, but she keeps her mouth shut and waits for a response.
Feyre answers first: “We’ll do it.”
Elain looks more doubtful, but seems to realize that refusing to go would paint her in a negative light. We can’t have that, can we? Nesta thinks wryly. She reaches for some macarons and starts stuffing them into her purse. “Sounds good. Great.” It is not at all great. Having her sisters in the same room as her and Lana might just be terrible enough to ruin Nesta’s next month or two.
“I’ll text you the details whenever I feel like it,” she tells Feyre and Elain as she rises out of her seat. Likely not for as long as possible.
“Where are you going?” Elain demands.
“I’m leaving.” Nesta pointedly drapes her coat over her shoulders, picking up her purse. “I have plans for the rest of the day, sorry.” Plans to get home and rate Gwyn’s work crush on a scale of one to ten. Maybe she’ll rewatch a sitcom if she has time.
“But it’s only been an hour,” Feyre protests.
Did Feyre think they would be spending the whole day together? Nesta wants to shudder at the mere idea of it, but she somehow… feels bad for her sister. “Maybe another time,” she promises vaguely. To provide some sort of reassurance, she adds, “I had fun today. Thanks for pulling this together.” The words are hollow, fake, and she’s probably a hypocrite for not being able to return the same sincerity she demanded from Feyre. But honesty isn’t going to get Nesta very far today, so this false politeness is the best she can manage.
Elain looks somewhat relieved, and Feyre looks disappointed but unsurprised. “Alright.” The girls nod at her. “Get home safe.”
She turns and leaves as soon as she’s given the green light.
A stale scent greets Nesta when she enters her apartment, reminding her that she hasn’t been around in days. In her defense, the winter months are easier to bear in Cassian’s heated cabin than in a poorly insulated basement.
Flicking the lights on, Nesta books it to the thermostat, her teeth nearly chattering out of her body. After turning the heat as high as it can go, she climbs beneath the covers of her bed without bothering to take her coat off. She doesn’t take out her phone to text the groupchat like she promised she would. She doesn’t even get her laptop to turn Netflix on. Rather, her focus is caught on the framed picture of her and Cassian sitting atop the dresser.
Everything was okay as she stepped out of the tea house. It wasn’t until she was inside her car that it came upon her: the whirlwind of emotions that had stayed so carefully hidden while she chatted with her sisters. All throughout the drive home, her mind kept returning to that one topic. Children.
Elain said that Nesta used to genuinely enjoy playing substitute mother when they were children, and she was right. But that was all fun and games, like playing teacher. What Elain left out was what happened after their actual mother died and their father went into debt, leaving all three girls in need of a parent figure. Nesta wasn’t a mother then—or at least, not a good one.
Now, she stares at the picture full of smiley cheeks and windblown hair, remembering the night that she realized she wanted to hold Cassian’s hand in hers.
She can’t imagine Cassian not wanting kids. They’ve never discussed it, but it’s so obvious to anyone who’s ever met him: he has too much love to give away to not one day end up with a whole brood of children. The thought makes Nesta’s stomach churn.
***
“Thanks again, guys.” Cassian shakes hands with his team as they file out of the conference room, all of them dressed professionally while he lingers in his hoodie. As soon as the last worker is out the door, he pulls out his phone, ready to shoot Nesta a message. She met up with her sisters alone today for the first time in a year, and he can’t wait any longer to find out if their brunch ended in a fight or not.
He clicks on his phone to find two texts from his brother, sent not too long ago.
Rhys: You’re in the office today for the monthly check-in, right?
Rhys: Don’t leave after the meeting is over. I’ll be there in an hour to introduce you to the new guy heading the Milan project.
Cassian frowns, confused. Rhys and the new guy are coming all the way up here to meet him? He didn’t know he was that important to the project.
While he waits for his unexpected guests, Cassian texts Nesta twice, and only receives a single short response saying she got home safe. Resolving to call and have a real conversation with her later, he gets up to change into the spare buttondown and pressed slacks he keeps in a locker in his office. If Rhys wants him to play the part of company boss, then he might as well look the part.
He’s adjusting the cuffs of his dark-colored shirt when the door to his office opens without warning, and Rhysand strides in followed by a stiff-looking young man.
Cassian eyes the stranger up and down first, trying to get a read on him the way he’s seen Nesta and Rhys read others. He doesn’t come up with a single thing, as usual, but he hopes he achieved his goal of looking intimidating.
“Cass,” Rhys greets him with a subdued nod, in full CEO mode. “This is our new hire, Keith O’Connell. I snagged him from right under Vanserra & Co.’s noses.” His near-violet eyes gleam with pride. “He’s going to be working out of Milan for us starting this summer.”
“Sounds good to me.” Cassian smiles lazily, and this is something he doesn’t need to fake—confidence. He reaches out to shake Keith’s hand. “Hi. I’m Cassian Madani.”
“Good to meet you.” The other man shakes back, but his grip is too tight, like he’s trying to break Cassian’s hand. Try-hard, a voice that sounds like Nesta tells him. Uses arrogance to cover up his insecurity.
Cassian takes it all into account as he pulls his hand away, seeing Keith through clearer eyes. His dark brown hair is slicked back with copious amounts of hair product, and a shrewd black gaze takes in every detail of the office. He stands like he’s attempting to seem taller than he actually is.
A typical white-collar worker looking for a way up the corporate ladder, Cassian concludes. Nothing he hasn’t seen before, but there must be a reason Rhys is so excited about him.
“Keith is starting here at your branch next week,” Rhys is saying when Cassian refocuses.
He blinks, unsure if he heard correctly. “What, all the way out here?” Away from Velaris in this modest mountain town?
“We agreed it was best if you two work together as closely as possible while preparing for the summer launch. Since you can’t come to Velaris, that means Keith comes here.”
Cassian looks at Rhys in astonishment. He thought that once he rejected the Milan position, he’d cleaned his hands of the job for good. Clearly he was wrong. “Just how involved am I going to be on this project?”
Rhys grins back at him. “You’ll lead from home base, of course.”
Cassian glares. Rhys responds with a look that says they’ll talk about this later.
Keith seems to find the idea of working alongside another person as distasteful as Cassian finds it unexpected, but he says anyway, “I can’t wait to start working together. I have a lot of ideas for the Italian outpost that I think you’ll appreciate.”
“I’m sure I will,” Cassian hums. “When do you start again?”
“Next Monday.”
“Then we should talk then.” Cassian gestures out the door. Keith looks taken aback, likely having expected more out of this meeting. But Cassian can’t meet with this guy until he gets a hold of what the fuck is going on. After shepherding Keith out of the office and shutting the door after him, he turns to Rhys with a raised brow.
“Don’t look at me like that,” Rhys warns. “Your role in this project is serious.”
“This project isn’t even part of my job description. What am I supposed to know about international business conductions?”
“You know enough to keep an eye on that O’Connell kid for me.” Rhys leans against Cassian’s desk as if it’s his own and crosses his feet. “He’s an asset to the company, but he also worked for our competitors up to a couple of months ago. I can’t trust him to manage this thing on his own, and I don’t have the time or resources right now to watch over him myself. That’s why the duty falls to you.”
“I manage security,” Cassian states, in case it wasn’t obvious. “What about Az?”
“Az has his own things to handle.” Rhys waves him off. “Just do what I tell you to, will you? Pay attention to O’Connell for the duration of the Italy venture and make sure he doesn’t steer our ship off course. You’ll get paid triple for the extra hours.”
“I don’t need triple,” Cassian grumbles, but Rhys is no longer listening. He’s typing on his phone and already heading for the door.
“Feyre and I are having dinner here before heading back home,” he calls over his shoulder. “See you later; I believe in you!” The door shuts after him, leaving Cassian alone.
“Yeah, yeah,” he replies to the empty room.
Cassian leaves not long after Rhysand does, having no excuse to linger. Outside, he’s greeted with a surprise leaning against the hood of his truck.
Nesta pushes off the hood as soon as he catches notice of her. “Long day?” she asks.
He laughs for the first time all afternoon, the sound surprised and genuine. “I was just thinking about you.”
“That’s why I’m here. I heard your thoughts.” There’s a light in her pale eyes that only burns whenever she looks at him. It’s the same light that powers her ability to make jokes and let her guard down around him in a way she can’t with most others, and Cassian is especially grateful for it today.
Nesta reaches out and takes his hand into hers. He watches the way their palms fit together in endless fascination, his brown fingers a stark contrast against her white ones. He squeezes once and looks back up at her. “How did meeting your sisters go? You never told me.”
The light flickers so briefly Cassian wonders if it’s a trick of his eyes. But then Nesta is there again, at full brightness. She squeezes his hand back. “Take me home. I’ll tell you all about it.”
***
a/n: i love writing stuff related to cassian’s job i’ll just be throwing random words in there and calling it business jargon
tagging: @hellasblessed @sjm-things @thewayshedreamed @drielecarla @valkyriewarriors @superspiritfestival @aliveahaahahafuck @cupcakey00 @sayosdreams @rainbowcheetah512 @claralady @thebluemartini @nessiantho @missing-merlin @duskandstarlight @lucy617 @sleeping-and-books @everything-that-i-love @cassianscool @swankii-art-teacher @wannawriteyouabook @awesomelena555 @julemmaes @wickedqueenoffantasy @poisonous-bloom @observationanxioustheorist @gisellefigue08 @courtofjurdan @theoverlyenthusiasticwriter @wolfiixxx @cass-nes @seashade @royaltykxx @illyrianundercover @queenestarcheron @monstrousloves-explodinggalaxies @humanexile @that-golden-lyre @agentsofsheilds @mercy-is-alive @cassiansbigwingspan @laylaameer01 @verypaleninja @maastrash @bow-dawn @perseusannabeth @dead-on-the-inside666 @jlinez @hungryreadingaddict @anidealiveson @planet-faerie @shallowhighwaters @ghostlyrose2 @chosenfamily-valkyriequeens @rarephloxes @readiajin @nessiantrashh @live-the-fangirl-life @ifinallygavein @xoblivisci @sjmships @jungtaekwoonie-is-life @lysandra-tiara @lanyjoy-13 @frosted-crackers @post-it-notes33 @loosingdreams @fromthelibraryofemilyj @18moneytoad @dontgetsalmonella @champanheandluxxury @togreblog
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thetriggeredhappy · 3 years
Text
day 1 let’s fuckin’ go. everyone listen to butterflies by samsa
Day 1: Pursuit
“You seriously don’t have any better games than this?” Scout complained, looking back down at the board, doubtful. “Not even, like, a deck of cards? To play poker or somethin’?”
“Rather not play two-person poker, and I don’t like gambling anyways,” was Sniper’s reply, not glancing up from shuffling the cards.
“I mean, maybe Go Fish then, or Old Maid, or—or somethin’, not fuckin’… Trivial Pursuit.”
Sniper seemed to mull that over for a moment. “If you don’t want to play,” he started to say, hesitant, and Scout sputtered to cut him off before he could finish that thought.
“I, I mean, I didn’t say that,” he managed, still half-glaring down at the board. “Just, y’know.”
Sniper probably didn’t know, actually. Truthfully, Scout wasn’t much for… book smarts type games. Games that needed quick reflexes, talking quickly, theatrics, those he was a champion at besides his eternally bad luck, but facts and numbers and geography? Those he tended to sort of… fuck up beyond recognition. And he really, really didn’t want to look like a complete idiot in front of Sniper.
Kind of the worst case scenario, actually. But the worse worst case scenario was driving the guy away before even getting to hang out with him, here, the first time he’d ever agreed to one of Scout’s dozens of proposed hangouts.
Hell, he’d honestly gotten used to Sniper always saying no. ‘Nah’ and ‘Not this time’ and ‘Afraid not, sorry mate’ were three phrases Scout had heard at least three and four times a week for months, now. He’d started brushing right through it, stopped letting it hurt his feelings even, although he couldn’t help but get his hopes up, still. Invitations to team drinking nights and poker parties and carpooling with the guys to the movies or a bar or a casino, or more overt invitations to listen to new albums or go out to get fast food or to fairs or to concerts, he’d long since gotten used to those standard, polite rejections.
So he was surprised, then, when he’d delivered his offhanded invitation—“Hey, Snipes, all the other guys bailed on the rec room game night tonight, you wanna be there anyways?”—he hadn’t expected Sniper to hesitate for a few seconds before shrugging and saying sure.
Hell, he was halfway through his ‘yeah no problem no worries man’ before he even realized Sniper said yes, then it was fumbling the whole rest of the way.
Better to be an idiot friend than a distant acquaintance, maybe. That’s what he told himself.
A brief mumbled rundown of the rules went in one ear and out the other as he got preoccupied with looking over one of the cards, mind boggled by what the hell the letters and colors were supposed to mean. A short summary was nodded at vaguely, and apparently his poker face had been terrible all along, because Sniper shrugged and said that they could just play first to six questions right and tally up wins from there. Then they rolled a dice and Sniper, apparently, would go first.
“Alright, uh,” Scout said, squinting down at the little card. “What does a… he-leo-logist, study?”
Sniper thought about it for a second. “Er… the sun,” he replied.
“Yep,” Scout nodded, nudged a piece towards him. Sniper took it. “So, uh, you go again?”
“Yeah. Er… geography, this time,” Sniper mumbled, shuffling some pieces around in a way that probably made sense to people who actually knew how this board game worked.
“Sure. What’s… the country that has South America’s highest and lowest points?”
Another pause. “Bloody… Argentina, isn’t it?” he asked.
“Damn. Okay, next one,” Scout said, less concerned about the fact that Sniper was doing well and more worried at the fact that he was gonna do awful.
“Geography again,” Sniper determined.
“What natural… breakwater, is off the north… eastern, part of Australia?” he read, a little stilted, squinting at the letters, like that would help, for once. Silence, for a pause, then for longer. Scout breathed an internal sigh of relief, smiling a little. “C’mon, it’s your own fuckin’, uh… country, continent, thing, isn’t it?”
“It’s both,” Sniper said, and paused. “It… it’s not talking about the bloody, er… Solomon Islands, is it?”
“Great Barrier Reef,” Scout replied.
Sniper muttered a swear. “Overthought it,” he sighed, nudging the dice over to Scout, who rolled it. Sniper glanced at the number, moved the pieces, looked at a card. “Right. What craft uses a… kiln, and a kick wheel?”
Scout could’ve cried. “That’s, uh, pottery, sculpting,” he said, relieved.
A nod from Sniper, a piece scooped onto his side of the table, the dice rolled a few seconds later when he realized he was supposed to do that. “How many colors are in the rainbow?” he asked next.
Scout had to count off on his fingers for a second. “Uh, seven,” he said, and fist-pumped when Sniper nodded, scooping up another piece. “Even though it’s, uh, kinda bullishit. There should be six.”
Sniper’s eyebrows ticking up in confusion probably was a sign he should drop it, but instead he found himself spouting off.
“Because, uh, like, y’know, there’s—there’s the kinds of colors, right?” he said, backpedaling at his response of furrowed eyebrows. “Like, the basic ones, the, uh, primary colors, that’s red and yellow and blue, y’know? And then the other three, that you get from mixing those, like, uh, red and yellow is, uh… is orange, and then like, green, and purple, you combine ‘em, right?”
Sniper nodded slowly after a moment.
“But then you got, uh, fuckin’… indigo. In the, uh, in the list of colors, fuckin’, Roy G. Biv? Red orange yellow, green, blue indigo violet? And I know it’s, like, blue and dark blue, but I think that still sucks. If we’ve got indigo we’ve gotta have like, the other in- between guys. Know what I mean?”
“Don’t have much of an opinion on it, but, sounds like you’re making points,” Sniper said, and Scout shrugged, glanced down at the table, tapped his fingertips against his knees out of sight to try and let out some nervous energy. “Bloody, er… your turn, or mine?”
“Uh, mine,” Scout said, scrambling to roll the dice.
“Right. Sorry. Er…” Sniper read over the card. “Patron saint of Scotland?”
Scout swore under his breath, deflating a little, coming up blank. “Uh… hey, Demo!” he called, and heard a vague ‘aye’ from the kitchen. “Who’s the patron saint of Scotland?”
“My mum,” Demo called back, and Sniper snickered, at least, which softened the blow to Scout’s confidence considerably.
“Ah, fuck off,” Scout called back, and looked back at Sniper, smiling. “Saint Scrumpy, fuck, I dunno.”
“Saint Andrew, apparently,” Sniper shrugged, rolling the dice. “Sports question. The orange one.”
Scout tried to read the question before starting to say anything out loud, and found himself completely lost anyways. “Who was the first… Ch—Check-uh-slavarian… to win, the… Wimbleton…”
“No idea,” Sniper said outright, shaking his head at himself. “Don’t follow, er… what, the Olympics?”
“Tennis, I guess,” Scout shrugged, rolling the dice.
“Sports for you too. What did… bloody hell. What did second baseman Bill… Wambsganss, do all by himself in the, er… 1920 World Series game?”
“Oh, shit,” Scout laughed, “guy did, like, a triple play, and then hit into a double later that same game. That was the year some guy got hit in the head with a ball and fuckin’ died.”
Sniper was staring at him, clearly shocked.
“What?” Scout asked, rolling the dice. “I know baseball. And it was a whole thing.”
Sniper seemed to shrug it off, shaking his head. “What’s the Taj Mahal made of?”
“Fuckin’, I dunno, chocolate? What, that some kinda dessert? What’s that?” Scout scoffed, trying to play it off.
“It’s… it’s a place. Looks a bit like a castle? Like, er, like the Eiffel Tower, or Big Ben, tourist sort of thing?” Sniper tried, and Scout shrugged, and he shrugged back, rolling the dice. “Fair enough. One of the, er, Science ones. Green one.”
Scout looked at the card for a few seconds. “I… dunno how to say this word. Glue… glay… what’s that?”
Sniper leaned over, and Scout turned it towards him. “Glaucoma. Hits your eyes,” he said, and Scout nodded, and he took a piece, rolled again. “Brown one.”
“What are… catalogued, under the Dewey decimal system?” Scout asked, eyebrows furrowing.
“Books, library books,” Sniper mumbled.
“Jesus, are you—where’s the mirrors, seriously? How are you doing that?” Scout asked, and Sniper huffed something like a laugh, taking the piece, rolling again. “No, no, seriously. How the hell do you know half of these?”
“Geography, blue,” he prompted.
“Alright, I swear to god.” Scout held the card close as he read it, first to himself, then out loud. “What national capital is heated by underground hot springs?”
Sniper, to his credit, paused for a moment before answering. “Iceland’s. Reykjavik, it’s called.”
“I swear to god.” Scout flipped over the card, read the answer. “Oh, what the fuck!”
“I’ve bloody been there!” Sniper defended.
“Nah, fuck off, hold on—“ Scout picked up another card, reading another question. “Where in a tree does photosynthesis happen?”
“Leaves.”
“How do you know that so fast!” Scout demanded.
“That’s just science class in school!”
“Fuckin’—who, fuckin’, rode on the raft with Huck Finn?” Scout asked next.
“The, er… runaway, Jim.”
“Oh, what!” Scout all but shouted.
“Scout, I read.”
“Nah, nah, you’re way too good at this game, either you’re like, cheating, or you on purpose picked this game because you’re, like, weirdly crazy good at it or something!”
Sniper’s expression went from amusement to that blankness again, and it only made Scout even more infuriated.
“I mean, seriously, did you pick this game on purpose because you just know all the cards? Did you just wanna do the game where you’d for sure win?” he demanded.
Sniper was fidgeting with his glasses, now, and to be honest, Scout wasn’t even particularly mad, just confused.
“I mean, shit, you’d think you just wanted too play this one so you could look smart and cool and shit like that,” he said. and saw the way Sniper shrank a little, and the lightbulb went off way too late.
A pause.
“Dude,” Scout said, fighting down a laugh.
Sniper mumbled something he didn’t quite hear, sinking in his chair.
“Alright, seriously, if you wanna look smarter than me, you really don’t gotta pull out the trivia questions. Pretty much any game works, you know that, right? I’ll make an idiot of myself playing, like… Uno,” Scout said. Sniper shrugged, still not looking him in the eye. “Okay. Here’s an idea. How about we play, uh… I dunno, Crazy Eights. And while we play I’m gonna keep grilling you on this random trivia shit because seriously, that’s totally nuts, man.”
Sniper hesitated for a few seconds before he finally nodded and straightened up, and in a way, they both won. Scout because he now at least knew he wasn’t the only one who was a total mess and way too worried about what other people thought, and Sniper because he could keep being impressive about random trivia knowledge. Apparently, he knew a bunch about geography and books and nature, and not a single thing about sports.
Scout accused him of trying to memorize the cards. Sniper laughed, properly, for the first time all night.
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jjkpls · 3 years
Text
the wishlist (m) - 5
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“She broke up with me.”
> genre : Angst, fluff
> pairing : jeon jungkook x reader (f)
> words : 4k
> content/warnings : back at it again w/ the bff2l; one sided love, lot of pining; explicit language; ambiguous infidelity; jjk heartbroken & crying; some wholesome flashbacks to make you swoon
previous - next
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The next box arrives about a month or so later. You haven’t seen Jungkook in a while. He had been out of town, hopping from shop to shop, completing a series of long-awaited guest positions. 
He’s kept you up with his days and his appointments as much as he could, sending you dorky selfies, little videos of city landscapes you’ve never seen before, and exhausted late vocal notes made in tiny, with dragged on, mumbled words, to wish you luck and send you some courage for work. 
You did not expect that the day you’ll meet again, he’d be so different from the Jungkook you prefer and left a month ago.
It takes you a few seconds to realize. At first, you’re preoccupied with the sudden set of needles stinging your insides when you hear the peculiar sound of your front door being unlocked. There’s a very finite amount of probability that it’s not him, he's the rudest of your tiny group of friends and the only one that feels comfortable enough in your home to invite himself without any prior warning.
It’s him, your best friend and subject of too many of your both daily and nightly thoughts and preoccupations.
Once he appears in the door frame, with his heavy coat on his heavy XXL sweatshirt, in his heavy military pants, face turned down hidden by his hair, the magic thing, that grows so mysteriously quick. There’s the little explosion of warmth in your chest. The one that makes you smile tenderly without meaning to. He’s allowed to see how happy he makes you, as a friend anyway. Everybody smiles this way when he walks into a room.
Your eyes catch sight of a box, all white, that fits in his hand. Your eyes roll on reflex. You’re about to curse again. It’s not nice, you don’t want to, to attack him as soon as he returns to you but he’s asking for it, isn't he?
He’s still in the hallway, slowly slipping his shoes off, focus fixed on the present in his hand. The time he takes doing it and the seemingly seriousness you feel irradiating from his aura, confuse you.
Jungkook shakes his head twice, the way he does, kind of like a wet puppy would, before setting the box on the counter of your open kitchen.
It’s only when he starts walking towards you, that his head raises up, just a bit, enough for his eyes to meet yours through his hair. He has a tiny smile as a greeting. He looks really upset. 
He should be bouncing on the balls of his feet, he should be doing some TikTok cringe dance moves to make you laugh or yell some greetings in a dialect. He has a lot of peculiar, very Jungkook ways to celebrate meeting you again after a while. Even if neither of you has ever said the words, you do miss each other a lot when you can’t see each other, and the excitement that blooms during your reunions translates that. 
But he’s sad today. It’s obvious. 
When he takes a seat beside you on the couch, he avoids your gaze. You’re agape, watching him with probably too much insistence, a hand holding a spoon half-filled with yoghurt in the air.
These few moments are decisive. They’ll determine rather he’ll talk or not. Jungkook, for someone who cries easily, is not good with feelings and sharing them aloud. Sometimes he can, often he can’t. He’s told you not to worry about it before, that it was fine because sometimes he just didn’t need to, he just wanted a shoulder to lay his head-on. 
“You okay, Guk?”
He shrugs. You just have the time to catch his upper lip sucked in, a twinkle in his eye before he’s switching position, bumping into you and hitting his own shin against the coffee table like a giant dog, unaware of his own growth, would. Only to settle for an impressively tiny huddle against your side, cheek pressed to your shoulder. 
So that’s how it’ll be. 
It’s heartbreaking, torturesome. You always feel miserable when you know he’s sad but not knowing the reason makes it a thousand times worse. You might be the same vengeful kid you used to be. The one who’ll inquire straight away who made him cry and immediately went on her way to beat that reason up -it being another child or the troll of a tree that made him trip. 
Except you are grown-ups now. He knows he can deal with his problems on his own and he would probably not let you go and try to beat up everyone -he probably doesn’t believe you can too, even though he’d be wrong about that. 
Jungkook tears his hand out of his pocket only to mime you to turn up the volume of the television. You do so and the pretty hand is gone and if it wasn’t for his quiet sniffling and the heavy press on your side, you wouldn’t know he’s really here with you at all. 
Your heart hurts the whole duration of the shitty afternoon movie, even if having his warmth next to you helps a little. He leaves later the way he entered, mostly silently, only smiling a bit when you smooch the side of his head and squeeze his forearm in a wordless comforting effort.
Guk
Sorry for earlier
Guk
It was nice seeing you though
You
Don’t be sorry. Can you call?
Guk
Yes, in 5
The five minutes turn out to be twenty. You wonder, hoping to be wrong, how numerous those tears were that he needed twenty minutes to dry them. 
When he finally calls, voice quiet and throat dry, whispering through the phone straight in your ear, uneasiness settles deep and heavy in your stomach as you know, you were right. 
“What happened, Jungkook?”
He must not have heard you this soft and gentle for a while because you can hear a humourless chuckle you recognize as incredulity. He clears his throat a first time, inhales deep and has to clear it a second time before he can start, still choking out on a syllable or two. 
“She broke up with me.”
The gasp that escapes you, loud and obnoxious, could not have been faked. This news is hardly believable to you. First of all, because, to your greatest guilty despair, Jungkook and his girlfriend, who’ve been dating for almost a year, are probably the embodiment of The Power Couple. There’s no doubt, in all the people that know them, that they are meant to be. They look good together. They are on the same page, always, it seems. They’re beautiful and enviable, an example of a match from Heaven, healthy and aesthetic if that's even a mentionable point.
You can’t, even in your deepest, darkest fantasies, have imagined them to break up. 
But the thing that makes it all the harder to comprehend is that she is the one who did it. The girl is great. She’s beautiful, she’s smart and funny, so you heard. She has that glamour to her, with her dainty pretty milky hands and long thin milky neck, with her silky, shiny black locks wondrously floating over her shoulders. She is great, matches him well.
She is not that far behind him but she's still not Jeon-Jungkook-great.
How could she have broken up with him? Someone dumping him makes no sense to you. 
“That’s-“ You catch yourself before the words slip out clumsily. You’ve never really been talented at comforting people with words, especially a crying Jungkook which is the equivalent of your very own kryptonite. “I’m so sorry, Jungkook.” And you mean it. Even more so when you hear him snivel hard. You’ve never allowed yourself to, even just for yourself, in the quiet and discreet comfort of your own head, wish for that to happen. Because if there’s one thing that you want more than anything else, more than having him for yourself, more than your own fulfilment, it’s his happiness. And he was happy with Jiyeun. He’s got the girl he had a crush on for months and they went so well together. “But why? Did she give you a reason?”
You hate how eager you sound asking. The question is so pressing though. You wish to know so bad why, in what circumstances, Jeon Jungkook gets dumped. 
“She-“ There’s a sob he swallows back. “I know what you’ll say,” Your eyebrows dip low on reflex. You couldn’t imagine the reason. He must have really fucked up but Jungkook is not the kind to fuck up. Even when he’s annoying, even when his mindset on something turns a bit auto-centric, he’s too compassionate, he’s too considerate and loving, to suddenly stop wondering how the person facing him is feeling and act without care, hurt them, in any way. It’s just not his kind. So what did he do that even you’ll have a word to say about it. “Spare me because she’s done enough.” 
It takes another set of minutes for him to gather himself, find most of his voice back clear enough for you to decipher. You show yourself patient, not saying anything and leaving him all the time that he needs. In all honesty, in the darkness of your curtain closed bedroom, tucked comfortably in your mountain of pillows and blankets, with your phone stuck to your ear and just the quiet sound of his breathing and humming to himself to break the silence, but rock it rather than disturb it, it’s easy to be patient. Feels like an ASMR. A class A type of ASMR, his breathing to your ear could so easily lead you to sleep. 
“Yesterday, she came to welcome me back and-“ Rather than hurt, his tone sounds weakened by shame now. What the hell did he do? “She found the- the thing I brought for you today.”
The fucking idiot.
“Oh my God.” You feel instant nausea. It's not like you never thought about it. You wondered, multiple times, if she was aware that her boyfriend was buying you these. You never allowed dipping far in the questioning because what would be the point? Ultimately, it's his relationship. And it's his way of shaping your friendship. If she kept smiling pleasantly, asking politely, as she always would, how you're doing whenever you happened to cross her path, leaving his apartment, or visiting his shop, it was fine by you. It must have been fine by her. She might have known about it, or she might not, didn't really matter. Jeon Jungkook is a grown-ass man, who's allowed to make his own decisions, no matter if they make sense to you, or her, or whoever.
But he's a fucking idiot.
If she didn't know, if he didn't warn her, and now she's mad after learning about it, and he's surprised and he's sad then he's a fucking idiot.
“She asked if it was for her, I wasn’t gonna lie!” Fantastic. He's passed the shock, soaked in wrath now. That was quick.
"For fuck's sake, Jungkook!"
"What?" He sounds a bit hysterical on the phone, voice rough and angry, incredulous, even mad that you might suggest he's wrong. Obviously, he already knew you'd react this way, hence the primary warning. "You're my best friend. I get to gift you whatever the fuck I want." He whisper-yells, suddenly very much aware again of the late time and the quiet calmness he'd perturbed. "She-"
"I don't think that's the issue, is it? Did she- Did you tell her that- Like, nothing was up?" You don't know how to articulate what you mean to ask. It sounds so bizarre, so irrealistic, the idea of something romantic or sexual going on between you two. It sounds so ludicrous you can't even say it. And again, you're scared to say the words. You don't know how they'll sound leaving your mouth. Suspicious, maybe revealing.
You owe to ask the question though. Because the cause of the sudden nausea comes from one surprisingly major reason, you would hate for her to hate you. To think of you as the bad guy, the massive bitch who stole her boyfriend. It shouldn't matter but it does.
"What do you mean?"
"That it was just friendly. Did you say that to her?" You stutter, largely on edge.
"Of course, I did." He doesn't seem to notice. Or to pay attention to the, evident to your ear, change in your tone. "She said that it didn't matter." You bite your tongue, along with the couple of words threatening to slide off it. Quite frankly, Jungkook is a weirdo with his own intake on the world surrounding him, she chose to date that special, in a lot of different ways, one, however, you can fairly understand that she wouldn't accept any explanation, of any kind, for this situation. "Do you get that? If she thought I was cheating, I'd understand that she'd be mad but- it's not even the case!"
You try to focus on the essence of the conversation, annihilate the faint words you can read in between the lines. The ones that say that even his girlfriend, in those strange circumstances, couldn't imagine the two of you as more than friends. Just as he couldn't. Just as you can't either.
"She knows and she's still mad. But- I do- I was just curious about it."
"About what?"
"The toys." He pouts, barely articulate like the kid he really is.
"Why didn't you get them for her, then? She's your girlfriend."
There's a pause after your words coming from him.
"She hates those." The pout sounds so thick now, in between the sniffs, you wonder if his mouth won't stay stuck in this position, like a cute permanent raspberry on his cute little dumb face. "I did once and she- threw it in my face and called me a freak."
"Jungkook." You sigh. "That explains a lot, by the way." This comment might be mainly for yourself. He doesn't need an explanation, as it seems. He doesn't seem that troubled about the whole deal, about that new hobby he's picked for himself. But you did. It's hard to simply content yourself with a "well, it is what it is" and nothing more.
He's been curious about them, couldn't buy them for Jiyeun because she wouldn't use them and make him feel guilty about his interest. He's sort of living it by procuration this way.
Now you feel guilty. He can't have found much satisfaction from your reviews if you ever have given him any. And she called him a freak. What a bitch. You wouldn't have imagined that coming from her.
Your mind is a mess.
"And it makes you happy. I see the way-" You hear the friction of tissues, the squeaking of his bed, and the deep sigh that follows when, as you picture, he finds a comfortable position on his back. "You seem much better. Less stressed and-" You cannot deny that. Even though it's partially frustrating, to think that he has this very unpleasant picture of you, of the version of you preceding the very first orgasm brought by him - sort of. You are feeling considerably better. Even if you have to force yourself not to abuse the masturbatory habits, not wishing to turn into a jerk off crazed teen like you once was when your hormones were fucking you up, it helps a lot. Sometimes it's a late-night quickie, other times a longer seance to celebrate the start of the weekend, or find force for the beginning of a new week.
"What was that again? Youthful?" You wonder aloud, an annoyingly amused smile on your face.
"Rejuvenated." He's laughing a bit. And for that, all the turmoil he's been putting you through feels fine and worth it. When you think about the heartbreaking tone of his voice when you first heard it through the phone, it eases an incredibly heavyweight to your heart, enchants you to know that he can still laugh, and you can still be the one reminding him how to. Unfortunately, his heart's just recalled how to hurt and the ache is back as quick as it pretended to leave an instant ago. "She said to never call her again." He confides with a hearable sorrow.
"She didn't mean it." It's surprisingly easy to be a good friend to him. The words you know he needs to hear not even hurting that bad.
"I don't know. We never fought like that before."
"Of course, you didn't. But it's been a year, it ought to happen at some point."
"But if she won't even let me talk to her, how am I supposed to make it better?"
"Be patient and leave her time to cool down." He sighs, already defeated. "Maybe send her a vocal note, she'll listen when she's ready.” They're awfully nice when he sends some to you. “It'll be fine." You're made to be together, probably, you should add. You could add, it might help him immensely, to dry the tears you can picture filling up his eyes. It's a little too much though. You're not that strong of a masochist to force this on you.
"How do you know that?"
"I just do. Don't worry too much." He can't. His heavy silence precisely screams that. "Do you wanna come to my island? I'll let you run in my flowers if you want."
It makes him laugh once again. The lovely, most satisfying sound to your ear.
"That's sweet of you." And it is, extremely sweet of you. If there's one thing that you despise is him sprinting through the mindfully planted flower beds of your Animal Crossing island. It pisses you off. Even more so when he does it by accident than on purpose, because this shit happens way too often. And now, you're allowing him to do so. You're definitely too good at being his friend. "It's fine though. Turnips sell at 138 on mine if you're interested."
It's your turn to be laughing now. You love how even with his heartbroken, upset and crying, he still picks up his Switch to check where's the turnips' stock at.
"Jungkook." I adore you.
You have for seemingly ever. Since the very first time you met.
You'd never forget it. How you almost passed out from laughing because of the street sign that nearly knocked him unconscious. His forehead was already bruising dark, eyes unfocused and shiny with tears. You didn't mean to laugh but he was adorable and funny, and even if you felt guilty for enjoying it, people don't run their faces into street signs every day. You called it in your own head a miracle.
He had to sit for a little while from how dizzy he felt. His ears were burning with embarrassment too, your uncontrollable giggling not helping. He just sat there, on a bench you had dragged him to, hands tucked in the pocket of his sweatshirt, waiting for you to allow him to leave.
The kid stood unbalanced the four times he tried to walk and even if at eleven, you had nothing close to a doctoral degree, you still felt like it was wrong to just let him stumble his way back home straight away. You had to hold him hostage for a little while. You had shared your homemade cookies with him, the ones you hid deep in your bag for you didn't want anyone to ask for a bite at school. You made him drink the whole content of your water bottle because drinking water is never an unhealthy thing to do, therefore, it felt like a good idea.
He was so shy that your own timidness quieted down enough to allow you to make conversation to him. Or more accurately talk over the silence and distract him. He giggled a lot and smiled with cute bunny teeth. Kept saying thank you for every bit of cookies you'd given him and once you had walked him home and he arrived safe and sound, he bowed very low, apologized and thanked you again.
You thought it'd be the end of it. He pretended to be going to the same school as you but you had never seen him also he was a few years younger.
The next day, and every single day after that, at recess, he would appear out of nowhere. Wearing his adorable smile, and a tint of red on his ears, a bunch of homemade cookies of his own filling up his pockets. As a puppy would, he'd follow you around with a certain distance until you waved him over, rolling your eyes, because if he was going to stick by your side, he might as well actually play with you.
The most precious friendship you have ever experienced bloomed from this seed. A friendship, at the start, mainly based on a shared interest for very sugary treats, marbles, and that common memory of him eating shit in this street sign. You didn't mean to remind him, it made him flush furiously each time and you were not that cruel, but you couldn't help bursting out in laughter whenever you'd walk home -with him or alone- and pass that sign. It's your favourite spot in your home town. You never miss an occasion to take a selfie for him whenever you go to visit your parents.
It's hard to define the moment your feelings, once purely platonic, changed. But there's a memory that feels notably significant.
A guy made you fall. A useless asshole, who in retrospect was not even worth a single crumble of your time. You were confused. As you often get, without really knowing why. Maybe it's just you, maybe it's for everyone the same. People start by being too good in your eyes, too good for you not to give them your all, and maybe build pyramides upon pyramides of expectations.
Until they're not anymore.
Suddenly, they hurt your feelings. They suck ass and you felt so invested emotionally, way too invested for it to be any kind of healthy, and their very human selves harm you straight in the heart, where it is the most painful.
It didn't feel like a mistake this time. Like any of the other times, at the beginning, of course, otherwise, it wouldn't catch you again and again.
You fell hard and it's Jungkook who picked you up. He had cooked for you, one of his mother's infamous recipes because he knew you wouldn't even bother eating otherwise. He had held you close. He had kissed the top of your head, your cheeks and your eyelids when a diehard tear had slipped. He had called you baby and sunshine and his little kitten. Had showered you in an unfamiliar type of loving. Something so soft, so tender and warm. Hands firm when they'd wrapped around you and pulled you in. Fingers gentle when they'd brush the hair out of your face. He took care of you, made you feel good in ways no one has ever had. You had not known him to be like that. Suddenly, he really felt like a man when he touched you, when he talked to you. He wasn't only a dorky little overgrown baby anymore. He was a man, shaped like one but also able to act like one. Able to take care of a woman, please one you were sure of it. And suddenly, you wanted, so desperately, to be that woman. To have the same free access you had on his usual candid-self, on this newly met man.
Of course, it's too ludicrous for you to ever act on it. But deep down, a naive tiny voice kept claiming, in the back of your mind, that you could spoil him. Very few people in this world know him the way you do, surely, no one can please him the way you could.
Guk
She listened to my note!!!
Guk
She said she'll make me miss her a bit more and then she'll call
It took less than a day for her to give him a sign. You're not surprised. It's hard not to miss him. You're not surprised but somehow, still, disappointed.
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A/N: tadam!! i needed to include some flashbacks because i know my fellow f2l addicts just adore these, also, i just can’t get over writing kookie as a cute kid.
Guess what guys? there is only one chapter to go *sweats profusely* I- am worried. I hope you keep enjoying it and will enjoy the rest. :] For now, let me know your thoughts. I hope you have a sweet, lazy Sunday and wish you a lovely, peacful week! bises!
As always please ask to be tagged for the final chapter on this post
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cloud9in · 3 years
Text
Promises (Poppy x MC) Part (2/?)
Read Part ONE (summary for fic is there)
ITS BEEN A MINUTE. @iamsimpforpoppy I hope you’re still around to read :P I love this story lol. Hope you guys do too!!!
Word Count (2.8k)
Bea and Poppy’s relationship became official a month after their initial meeting. One would say they moved quickly, too quickly. But every love story is different. This one in particular seemed to have little to none flaws, if you ignored the fact that Bea was promoted to Carter’s right hand woman in the Southside Spades.
 They did end up having that conversation after all.
 “…Are you sure Carter? I mean this is a huge deal and a special role-“
 “If I didn’t think you were capable you wouldn’t be here right now Goldilocks.”
 Carter winked and clinked his half empty beer bottle against Bea’s, who surprisingly had a nearly full bottle. He took note of the abnormality. 
 The blonde instinctively rolled her eyes at the nickname, “Okay but that name has to go. We need codenames……ooooh how about bimbo and himbo.” 
 “I’m guessing…..no, hoping I’m the himbo?!” Carter comments as he promptly tries to stop the laugh escaping from his lips.
 “Mmmmmmm, I’ll get back to you on that.”
 They share a laugh and Bea feels Carter’s gaze latch onto her in her peripherals. She could sense the shift of energy in the space between them, it almost felt uncomfortable, and that was something she never felt with Carter. “I never asked you if you were okay with such a role. If you aren't, I understand completely, I just want the best for you.”
 The blonde eyes soften at his comment and she looks at him, “never doubted that, where is this going though because you never express your feelings like a normal human being.”
 He pulls on the strings of her hoodie until it completely caves around her face, burying her whole.
 “Hey asshole!” 
 “That’s for talking too much.”
 Bea yanks her hoodie open and sticks her tongue out in a mock expression. “Oh boohoo. Poppy literally says the same thing, I don’t get it. I talk, it’s a problem. I don’t talk, it’s an even BIGGER problem. Damn a girl can’t ever exist in peace.”
 Carter places his bottle flat on the table and studies the blonde’s face. 
 She kept rambling on about her new girlfriend and the gang leader didn’t know it was possible to feel happy yet anxious at the same time. He was aware of when they entered the talking stage, went on their first date, and finally became official, because Bea told him everything. As much as the experience of being in a real relationship was new to her, Bea looked up to him and somehow she knew Carter would give her the best guidance possible. 
 It didn’t stop him from worrying. Like an older brother would. He feared the two would mix, and everyone knows that love and crime will eventually combust. He is no stranger to it.  
 “Bea.”
 “Did you know she stole one of my hoodies and actually won’t give it back?? What am I supposed to do, just take it? No she’d murder me.”
 “Jackson.”
 Her voice slowly dies down after sensing the seriousness in his tone. She takes a sip of her beer to ease the silence that sat in the air, and Carter responds shortly after.
 “You know I trust you with my life right? You’re very important to me, kid.” 
 “I know.”
 Guilt was a feeling he chose to lock away in an unbreakable box and bury six feet deep. There couldn’t be guilt in a lifestyle like this. But Bea was his only exception. And she was slowly bringing that box back up to the surface. 
 “I need you to promise me that you won’t let these two worlds collide.”
 “Carter….”
 “One of you will get hurt. And I won’t forgive myself if it’s you.”
 He leaves Bea at the table, the remnants of his comment still replaying in her head. She pulls out her phone and sees a text from Poppy on her lockscreen. 
 Other Half 💗❤️‍🔥- Can’t wait to see you tomorrow 😘 
 The blonde smiles unconsciously and opens the message to respond.
 I’m missing you like crazy. I have a special surprise for you.
 Other Half 💗❤️‍🔥- You know I highly dislike surprises, just tell me. 
 And ruin the surprise? You must be crazier than I thought. 
 Other Half 💗❤️‍🔥- Jackson.
 Patience babe…tomorrow it is. 
 Bea clicks her phone shut and slips it back into her pocket before downing the rest of the beer. 
***
“You know your hand on my ass only makes them stare even more Jackson?”
 Bea bites her lips and gropes the blonde’s plump backside shamelessly while slowly whispering into her ear.
 “That’s the point, princess.”
 Poppy shivers almost instantly at the boldness. “Is this the surprise you were talking about?” Bea doesn’t answer, instead trailing her hand up Poppy’s skirt. This was definitely not the time and place for such behavior but she was clearly still learning everything about her girlfriend. 
 And it definitely felt good to call her that.
 “Since when did you get so brazen? You know you’re exactly the type of person my daddy told me to stay away from.”
 Bea laughs at that statement and wraps her arm around the blonde’s waist, “yeah? And why’s that?”
 “Well I can’t ask him now, he might rough you up and that’s my job.” 
 Poppy could feel the stares of everyone burning into them, but she could only focus on the blonde cuddled up against her. The shorter girl wouldn’t call herself an attention whore, but she sure loved the PDA that Bea projected without a care. It felt nice to be genuinely admired in public rather than putting on a mask everyday. 
 But it’s safe to say that Poppy preferred all the handsy stuff to happen in private. 
 “Do you want to grab dinner with me tonight Pops?”
 “Am I picking the place?”
 “…Yes.”
 “Then yes.”
 Bea rolls her eyes at the blonde’s downright shady self but smiles nevertheless. 
 “Now don’t cancel on me out of the blue. I will not be thrilled about it.”
 “Shouldn’t I be telling you this? Your dad always has something going on in his business that somehow has to involve you too.”
 Poppy sighs and glances over at Bea, “well you know I’ll have to take over eventually. Especially since I’m legally allowed to handle deals now.”
 “I hate that word. Legal. Ugh.” 
 The shorter girl scoffs and plants her hands on her hips, “yeah I bet you do.”
***
Bea dragged open her closet in search of clothes for dinner tonight but the dinging noise of a text distracts her. 
 C-Dog🖤- Need you tonight. Something came up, meet us at the garage.
Bea wanted to thank the gods up above that she didn’t promise Poppy that she’d show up for dinner. But that wasn’t going to save her from the fury of the blonde. Good thing it can’t get worse than that, right….?
Only it was. And Poppy will probably beat her up herself, if she wasn’t dead by the next day. 
Bea’s mind and heart races as she digs her brain for a proper excuse to tell her girlfriend, but is very unsuccessful. She’s good at drug dealing though. 
 Going with the good ole truth never really hurt right?
 Baby I’m so sorry I won’t be able to make it tonight. Got held up with the gang. I know I’m an asshole, I’ll keep in touch I swear. 
 Other Half 💗❤️‍🔥- What else could I expect from my gang banger girlfriend 🙄 please stay safe..
 You know I always do.
 Other Half 💗❤️‍🔥- Do I? We need to talk about this tomorrow.
 Of course Pops.
 Other Half 💗❤️‍🔥- Call me every chance you get or I swear I’ll track you and trust me you do not want me to do that.
 Yeah she definitely doesn’t. Especially since Carter sounded frantic over the phone. The last thing Bea needed was a paranoid girlfriend, so she played it cool like always. 
 Just simple stuff baby girl, talk soon.
 ***
“…What do you mean it’s gone?! So where is it? Do you know what this means Carter??”
 The gang leader sighs frustratingly, rubbing his eyes in efforts to gain some stability. “The product was here, and now it is not. Which can only mean it was stolen. And when I find out which son of a bitch did it, they’re dead.”
 “In the meantime, we are dead”, Bea emphasizes wildly. “This is the Red Raven gang we’re talking about. If they get any inclination that we lost their drugs, they’ll kill and replace us. No mercy. None.”
The blonde paces back and forth trying not to think about buying a plane ticket to Timbuktu. 
Carter approaches Bea and plants his hands on her shoulder, “breathe Jackson. You are my partner. The leader of this gang. So get it out of your system and start being rational.”
 The blonde lets her shoulders sag as she inhales and exhales in place for a while. The minute she’s grounded she catches Carter’s gaze and her eyes light up. “List. I need a list of whoever went in the room with all of the product. We need to narrow it down.”
***
“Jackson you’re a fucking genius.”
 “It’s called having common sense but I’ll take the praise. It’s the only one I’m getting from you anyways.”
 Carter resisted the urge to pick a fight with the younger girl, because finding stolen drugs and not getting killed seemed like a much better idea. 
 Bea figured out that Henry, one of the newly recruited members of SS was a thief, or maybe just a crackhead. Same thing. He was the last to be in that room so all eyes were on him, and guns.
 “Heyyy buddy. Henry right?”
 The shorter man trembled at the sight of a gun lodged right into his mouth. “Mmmm!”
 “Oh I’m sorry, did you want to say something? Here let me just”, Bea clicks the gun which only causes the thief to panic even more. It was almost pitiful. 
 “Alright lay off the poor sucker.” 
 Bea pulls the gun out of his mouth and sits down on a stool in front of Henry with a grin. “So…where is the stash darling?” 
 He points almost immediately to a built in storage locker with a shaky finger. 
 “Ohhh well that was so easy Henry! Glad you could comply. You should tell your friends to be more like you. But…between me and you, they might already be dead”, Bea whispers that last part slowly, smirking when Henry’s lip quivers violently. 
 “Please just do it already! Why are you guys waiting?”
 Bea raised an eyebrow in surprise and glanced over at Carter who scanned the man’s face intensely. “I guess he wants to die? Talk about kinks I mean come on”
 “No.”
 Carter reaches his arm out towards Bea but never takes his eyes off Henry. The blonde watches in confusion until she realizes the thief is looking behind her, and so is Carter.
 “It’s a setup Bea, duck!”
 She dived for the ground quicker than lightning as a bullet flies through the air, leaving a trail of dust behind. Carter ducks for cover as well and starts firing rounds towards the men who snuck up on them. He managed to hit three of them but one grabs Bea by the leg and drags her against the rough concrete. 
 “Son of a- get your dirty hands off of my Dr. Martens. My girlfriend bought me these!”
 A swift kick to the face shut the blonde up real quick but she manages to recoil and send the man sprawling backwards into a row of barrels. 
 Carter guns him down and Bea finds her footing, pistol in hand and a thirst for revenge. But they never stopped coming. 
 Her and Carter were left battered and bruised, but alive. Their product was gone again though. But atleast they were alive. Carter told her that it was a theft mission primarily and neither of them were meant to die. But it only made Bea wonder who those people were.
 And why were they kept alive?
***
“Beatriz Naomi Jackson what the actual fuck?!”
 “Oh not the middle name…”
 Bea tries to avoid Poppy’s killer gaze as she surveys the damage that had been done to her girlfriend’s torso, legs, and face. 
 The strawberry blonde could barely mutter a word. Her mouth opened and closed in brief shock before collapsing next to the injured girl. 
 Bea could see the tears flowing down her rosy cheeks, which contrasted her porcelain skin. “Poppy…are you crying? I..please don’t..”
 “What do you expect me to do Bea? It kills me to see you hurt like this. Who did it? Tell me!” The blonde chokes on her own words as her hands hovers cautiously over Bea’s wounds, afraid to make her feel pain.
 “No I can’t tell you. I mean…I didn’t expect this to happen. It was a setup and we were outnumbered-“
 “We need to get you to a hospital Bea oh my god.”
 The blonde knew that she couldn’t go there. Not with the cops on the scene of the shootout, and actively looking for the people involved. Aka her and Carter. He told her to lay low and heal up, but she didn’t expect Poppy to be sitting on her bed waiting for her when she got home. The initial look on her face made Bea regret ever choosing this life. 
 She regrets it ever since being with Poppy. But it’s like a drug, once you start it’s hard to stop. 
 “I’ll call my father, he has the best doctors available and we’re gonna get your the right treatment and-“ 
 Poppy immediately cuts off, her eyebrows scrunching up until she realizes something. “Wait…what do you mean you were outnumbered Bea?” 
 Bea swallows heavily, praying that this conversation couldn’t escalate further, but that isn’t the case. 
 “Bea, answer me”
 “It..it was just me and Carter. We didn’t think there would be an ambush. We had just gone there to get goods we lost.”
 “And where is Carter? Does he know you’re like this right now? Did he leave you, I swear to god Bea if he left you…” Poppy’s voice cracks as her whole body shivers in violent waves. 
 Bea pulls her girlfriend in for a hug even though it causes every inch of her body to sting harshly. It was the comfort that she needed though. Watching Poppy breakdown over the sight of her was too much, and she began to contemplate everything. 
 “Pops listen to me, I cannot go to the hospital right now. There are cops looking for us.” The strawberry blonde stares at her until she understands the velocity of Bea’s words. 
 “Fine. But there will be a doctor that will come to treat you at my house. And you’re coming, I don’t want to hear it.” 
 Bea knew not to protest that. It was quite obvious this whole incident has left both parties distraught and she didn’t want to try and tell Poppy how to feel. 
 “Just tell me something. Are you in immediate danger? Is someone trying to harm you right now.”
 The blonde chose her words carefully. Because even after coming home beaten to a pulp, she still couldn’t tell the love of her life the full truth. 
 “No Poppy, they just wanted the drugs. They got what they wanted. I’m not in danger.”
 For now.
 “I will be okay.”
 I hope.
 “Don’t lie to me Jackson. I can’t do this if you lie. You promised me you wouldn’t get to the point where you’d have to choose between me and the gang.”
 “I know Poppy…I-“
 “You promised.”
 “And I’m going to keep that promise-“
 “Yeah the hell you are. And you’re going to promise me that you won’t ever come home like this again. You’re going to get yourself killed before we even start our life together. Our future.”
 Bea sucks in a breath which punctures her chest. She couldn’t tell if the injuries or Poppy’s words had caused that terrible ache. “Our…Wait I..”
 “I love you Jackson. I…don’t care if you think it’s too early to say that. I don’t care if I sound too cheesy for a mean girl. I love kissing you and feeling the laughter run through your body when we hug. I love being the reason you smile. I love you. And you don’t have to say it back. I just..I needed you to know-“
 “I love you too. Probably maybe from the moment I met you.”
 Poppy’s eyes seemed to glisten once again and this time there was no sadness etched into the shape. She smiled a pure smile and wrapped her arms around Bea in a tight hug. 
 She captures her lips in a searing kiss that leads to a trail of kisses down the strawberry blonde’s neck, dip of her collarbone, and chest. Bea kisses her until her chest gives out from exhaustion and pain.
 “Then you have to promise that this won’t happen again.” 
 “I promise.”
 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
NOTES: They’re gonna be fineeeee, right guys??? Graduation next chapter woooo.
Tags: @samanthadalton @somewillwin @clowneryme  @baexpoppy @poppysmc @doey-eyes8 @veenast @straightlikewetspaghetti @phoennixxsblog
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five-rivers · 3 years
Text
Danger First
Chapter 9
@pocketramblr
.
Banjo took Hikage to the side while the other ghosts were still wading through their existential crisis.
"Man," he said, "Hikage, bro. You know I love you."
"You do?"
"Like... at least eighty-five percent of the time."
"Ah, continue."
"But next time you think one of us has a secret relative out there, you've got to say something so we don't get blindsided."
"You're sure?"
"Positive."
"Alright, then. I couldn't help but notice that both Ninth's mother and 'Tomura' share a strong resemblance to Nana."
"... I've changed my mind."
.
Although Midoriya Inko had abandoned the tech conference as soon as she heard about the attack on the USJ, she, unlike the mist villain, could not teleport. Therefore, Izuku was stuck in the nurse's office even after he had woken up and paramedics had confirmed that his injuries began and ended at bruises and quirk exhaustion. (And a potentially fractured bone in his foot, but that wasn't worth mentioning.)
Sitting next to the police officer with nothing to do was... awkward. Very awkward. His hands itched for his notebooks, but everything they brought to the USJ was evidence, and he hadn't been allowed to go back to the classroom. He wanted to know what happened to his classmates and Mr. Aizawa, who he hadn't seen since he ran away from the plaza and left him with the hand villain, and Mr. Yagi, who had really taken a beating from Nomu. Danger Sense was quiet, relatively speaking, but Float was just waiting to be used and tested.
Plus, he really, really had to talk to Mr. Yagi about that. Loads of his classmates had seen him use Float. How was he supposed to explain having Float right after telling them he probably had a sensory quirk?
Plus, if he got Float, it stood to reason that he'd get all the other One for All users' quirks as well. So he had to figure out how to make Danger Sense, Float, Smokescreen, Blackwhip, and a strength enhancement all look like the same quirk. Which, maybe they were, technically, considering that Monoma had sensed One for All as a single quirk but whatever was going on with the mist villain as multiple quirks...
Point was, One for All definitely functioned as multiple quirks.
Would his friends think he was lying? No, he'd definitely proven Danger Sense existed by predicting, however loosely, the attack.
"Hey, Tamakawa."
Izuku and the officer looked up at one of the detectives who had come to take initial statements. His name was... Tsukauchi, Izuku thought. Mr. Yagi (as Mr. Yagi) was standing behind him.
"I can take it from here. I have a few more questions for Midoriya."
"Yes, sir. Midoriya." He nodded at them as he left the room.
"How are you feeling, Young Midoriya?" asked Mr. Yagi, taking the officer's spot with a slight groan.
"Uh, better than this morning, actually," he said. "But, um, but what about you? That Nomu guy kept, um..." His eyes trailed towards the detective.
"Ah, this is Detective Tsukauchi Naomasa. He's an old friend of mine. He knows... well, just about everything about me."
Izuku nodded slowly. "So, he knows about, um..."
"I know about One for All," said Tsukauchi.
"Oh," said Izuku. He rapidly gathered together his thoughts, trying to decide what the most important piece of information he had to impart was. "Do you know what happened to Mr. Aizawa? And Ingenium?"
That was most definitely not a piece of information. Stupid brain.
"The portal villain, Kurogiri, teleported Aizawa off UA grounds, but he was able to get help quickly after that. Ingenium had some injuries that need a specialist, so he went home. They'll be alright, but they'll probably have to take a few days off."
"Yes," said Tsukauchi, giving Mr. Yagi one of the driest looks Izuku had ever seen. "Because you heroes are so good about that."
"Teaching isn't exactly strenuous, Naomasa."
"Remind me again how you got injured this time."
Mr. Yagi made a face Izuku would have found hilarious under other circumstances. "That's different," he said, plaintively.
"Is it though?"
Mr. Yagi coughed. "Now, Midoriya, my boy... I'm sure you have things you want to talk about... I think I glimpsed you soaring through the air, earlier. Did you unlock the enhancement aspect of One for All?"
"No," said Izuku. "Not exactly."
.
"Well," said Mr. Yagi. "That's, hm. Certainly something."
"Sorry," said Izuku.
"You have nothing to apologize for, my boy," said Mr. Yagi, patting his knee. "In fact, it's a good thing that you got Float this time. I'd be at a loss about what to do with Smokescreen or Blackwhip. But I'm fairly familiar with my master's quirk, and, well, there's someone else who I should... get back into contact with..." Mr. Yagi force the words out as if they had physically pained him to say.
Which they might have. He did have the whole... coughing... thing. Maybe he was just trying to hold one back?
"Mr. Yagi? Are you okay?"
"I'm fine, I'm fine."
"Okay, are you sure?" He wasn't sure if he wanted to bring the next part up if Mr. Yagi wasn't feeling well.
"Yes," said Mr. Yagi. "I just, hm. It's just... history."
Izuku nodded. "So, um. Did you hear Monoma say that the mist guy - Kurogiri? - had multiple quirks, too? Like Nomu?"
The mood plummeted.
"Yes," said Tsukauchi. "He told me, and I told Toshinori. It appears that Kurogiri's warp quirk is actually several different quirks working as one. Merged together, almost."
Izuku nodded. "I was just wondering... One for All can be passed on, so... are there other quirks like that? Like, if the first person with One for All had family members or something? Or..." Izuku trailed off. Mr. Yagi now looked actively ill. "Did I say something wrong?"
"Toshinori," said Tsukauchi, "you mean you didn't tell him already?"
"In my defense, I thought he was extremely dead."
"What- Who are you talking about?"
"My boy... I think it's time to tell you a story of two brothers..."
.
"So, One for All comes with a built in nemesis? Who may be immortal?"
"That- He's not... It would appear so."
"I am somehow both surprised and not."
.
"There's one more thing I wanted to ask you about before your mother arrives," said Mr. Yagi.
"Please tell me it's not something worse, like me being a descendant of the guy," requested Izuku, picking the worst, most ridiculous thing he could think of.
Tsukauchi snorted, then covered the noise up with a cough.
"I seriously doubt that All for One could maintain a romantic relationship of any kind," said Mr. Yagi, "and even if you were, it wouldn't really matter. I mean, his own brother hated his guts."
.
"That's a bit extreme..." murmured Yoichi.
"Considering some of the rants we've gotten you to go on," said En, "it really isn't."
"Maybe. Maybe not. But the rest of it-" Yoichi promptly left to harass Second and Third.
"How can you two be so close and yet so far?" mourned Nana. "How are you so smart and so dumb at the same time?"
"In Ninth's defense," said En, "he doesn't know what All for One looks like."
"Surely he knows what his father looks like. He sees his picture almost every day," said Hikage.
"Admittedly, I could have phrased that better, but are you rubbing that in, or are you serious? I've known you for, like, half a century and I still can't tell."
.
Despite the example being a joke, Izuku felt much better after hearing that.
"But, no, this subject is relatively neutral and nothing so dramatic. I was hoping to get your permission to tell young Aizawa about One for All."
Izuku opened and closed his mouth several times. "H-huh? Why? And why do you want my permission? You don't need my permission."
"One for All is your quirk, now," said Yagi, "and your secret. It's up to you who knows about it. Outside of an emergency, I suppose. As for why in general..." Mr. Yagi sighed. "There are things young Aizawa needs to know about the villains with multiple quirks and All for One. I can't tell you the details right now, but with how One for All is manifesting in you, if he only knows about All for One, it would be very easy for him to make incorrect assumptions."
"Oh," said Izuku. He could certainly see how that could be dangerous. He didn't want his teacher to associate him with a villain like that.
"Also, if he knows what's happening, it will be easier for him to help you," finished Mr. Yagi hopefully.
Izuku thought about it. "I guess that would be alright. But... He's not the only person who'll know about my quirk being weird and All for One, right? I mean, the Hero Commission, at least..."
"To be entirely honest with you, I tell the HPSC as little as possible about All for One and One for All."
"What? Why?" asked Izuku.
"Well-"
"Izuku!"
"Mom!"
"I'll explain later," said All Might quickly.
.
Kurogiri passed a damp washcloth over the burns on his neck. The metal of his collar was a conductor, and the charge the young man with the electricity quirk had sent through it had been significant. It was only natural for it to get hot, for it to burn.
He should go to the Doctor... Some of the collar's functionality seemed to be damaged. He brushed his mist covered fingers over the cool metal.
Tomura wouldn't tell the Doctor. Kurogiri cared deeply for Tomura, but the young man was certainly shallow and unlikely to realize the extent of Kurogiri's injuries. He was more likely to focus on his own, not insignificant, wounds.
In contrast to those, Kurogiri's paled. He wasn't nearly as important as Tomura, after all.
It should be fine to let his wounds and the collar be. It would do what it was supposed to and protect the vulnerable areas of his body, internal damage or no. He just had to be careful of the burns becoming infected, especially since he couldn't see them.
Sometimes, he wished his body was like it was before...
Kurogiri frowned at the thought even as it faded from his consciousness. He had been created by All for One fully formed. His body had always been like this.
Hadn't it?
.
Shouta had been in and out of consciousness the past few hours. Apparently he'd never been in serious danger of dying, except from shock, which was just his body being dramatic and didn't count. All his major organs were free of serious damage. He just had to regain his stamina so that Recovery Girl could heal him up, and then he'd be fine.
Unlike Tensei, apparently, who had cracked one of his engines, which needed specialist help and surgery to realign the pieces. Or All Might, who had taken hits to his old injury, and needed to take time off or lose more time from his hero form. Or his students, who hadn't been seriously injured but who were probably traumatized.
The last time he had woken up, though, Hizashi had been there. Now, All Might, Nezu, and Detective Tsukauchi were there.
"Thought I already gave my statement," said Shouta.
"You did," said Tsukauchi.
"We're here to give you more information about the attack, I'm afraid," said Nezu.
"Information I won't like?"
"It can wait until you feel better, of course."
"That's illogical," said Shouta. "The sooner I get the information, the more time I have to process it."
All Might, Yagi, sighed. "Nomu and the portal-using villain both had multiple quirks."
Shouta frowned. "You mean, they had quirks with multiple aspects?"
"No," said Nezu. "As Yagi said, they had multiple quirks. This was confirmed by both the villains' comments and by Monoma, who made contact with the portal villain and was able to copy multiple quirks."
"Kurogiri," said Shouta. "That's what the other one called him. Shigaraki."
Nezu nodded. "Indeed. We weren't sure you had heard that." He tapped his paws together. "What we are about to tell you is classified. We are only sharing it with you because of your unique position and history."
"In the wrong hands, it could cause a lot of damage," said Yagi.
Only two things kept Shouta from leaping out the window and escaping: the fact that he was basically immobilized in plaster casts and the fact that his students were already involved in whatever this was.
"Great. What is it?"
"To begin," said Tsukauchi, "Monoma said he was able to copy three quirks from Kurogiri."
"That's up from what he could do before," observed Shouta. Stress did push quirks to improve, sometimes, although Shouta hated for the improvement to be associated with trauma.
Tsukauchi nodded. "He made note of that as well. He said he picked up a quirk that allowed him to turn his body parts into portals that led to other body parts, a quirk allowed him to temporarily teleport his body parts, and..." he trailed off.
"And a quirk that at the very least bears a strong resemblance to Shirakumo Oboro's Cloud."
"What are you saying?" asked Shouta, ignoring the way his heart had almost stopped.
"At the moment? Only that it is very strange that Kurogiri had a quirk like that, and sent you to the place where Shirakumo Oboro died."
"Oboro would never-"
"We're not saying that," interrupted Yagi. He coughed into his hand. "There's more context. Have you ever heard of the quirk bogeyman?"
.
"I can't wait to never sleep again I'm my entire life," said Shouta.
"Wait," said Tsukauchi, "it gets worse."
"How could it get worse?"
"Naomasa, you're supposed to be on my side," complained Yagi.
"I am. That's why I'll stop Eraserhead here from trying to kill you after you finish explaining."
"Well, it has to do with young Midoriya's quirk..."
.
"Let me get this straight, you gave the quirk with an immortal supervillain archenemy attached to a child... and didn't tell him that the supervillain existed."
"When you say it like that, it sounds really bad-"
"It is really bad-!"
.
"If I'd known he was still alive-"
"What part of immortal do you not understand?"
"Shouta, I, too, believed that All for One-"
"Shut up, Nezu! I don't have the energy to be mad at both of you right now!"
.
Yagi, Tsukauchi, and Nezu were all shown out by an irate nurse while a different but equally irate nurse replaced the plaster cast on Shouta's arm.
It had definitely been worth it.
.
Just because school was canceled, that didn't mean training was canceled.
... except it did, both because Inko was too stressed to let Izuku out of the house, and because Mr. Yagi had a meeting to go to about the attack.
But the second day after the attack was a different story!
That morning, Mr. Yagi pulled up in front of Izuku's apartment in Hercules (still so cool!) and picked him up.
Izuku bounced enthusiastically into the car and then froze. "Oh my gosh, what happened to your eye? Was it a villain? How hard did they hit you?" his hands fluttered. "I have some cream-"
"Oh," said Mr. Yagi, "no need, young Midoriya! I, er, sort of deserved it. It's a sort of reminder to take it easy, too. People would be disturbed to see All Might with a black eye, after all!" He smiled, then winced.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes, very. You should buckle up, my boy."
"Oh, right," said Izuku. "So, where are we going? You said there was someone you wanted to introduce me to."
"Yes," said Mr. Yagi. "My old teacher. It's been a while since I've seen him. Hopefully he won't make up for lost time with a kick to the face..."
"What?"
"Don't worry about it."
When Mr. Yagi spent most of the way over muttering about kicks to the face and head, Izuku decided that he should, in fact, worry about it.
.
The broken-down building was not what Izuku had been expecting.
"Are you sure this is the right place?" asked Izuku.
"Absolutely," said Mr. Yagi, who was shaking somewhat. "This Pavlovian response only confirms it."
"Um." The building looked condemned. "Maybe he moved."
"One can only hope," said Mr. Yagi. "Maybe you sh- No. I have to see this through." He steeled himself visibly, squaring shoulders. "Please not a kick to the face," he said, under his breath.
"Is he really that bad?" asked Izuku.
"My boy, I guarantee you that he's worse."
.
"Poor kid has no idea what's coming," said Banjo. "Although we wouldn't have believed it either if we weren't riding along and watching."
"Nana," said En, "I just want to reiterate that I'm very glad you never thought about giving One for All to Gran Torino."
"Come on. Sorahiko isn't that bad," protested Nana.
"We know," said everyone else, "he's worse."
.
They walked up to the apartment building door. Mr. Yagi sighed heavily on seeing the door was hanging open, which was a radically different reaction than what Izuku would have expected.
"Is Danger Sense doing anything?"
"I don't think so?"
"Let me know if that changes."
"R-right," said Izuku. Mr. Yagi pushed the door in, and Izuku followed cautiously after him.
They went down a few hallways, peeking in rooms. Then they got to the kitchen, and Izuku covered his mouth with both hands with a gasp at the grisly, bloody scene. Gran Torino laid on the floor in a pool of red liquid. "Oh my gosh, he's-"
At the same time, Mr. Yagi said, "At least it's not a kic-"
The supposedly dead hero was suddenly airborne, and flying towards Mr. Yagi, foot first. Specifically, at his face. "You thou-"
Danger Sense spiked. It was a tiny spike, but still.
Izuku reacted. Specifically, with nerves shot by the USJ attack, he reacted violently, lashing out with a fist, swatting Gran Torino out of the air and back into the puddle of what was, in retrospect, probably diluted ketchup.
For a moment, everything was silent.
"Oh my gosh," wailed Izuku. "I assaulted a senior citizen!"
Gran Torino bounced back to his feet. "I like this kid, Toshinori!"
"I'm... glad?"
"Now show me what you've g-"
"Gran, please, we're only here for quirk help, not battle training."
"What's the difference? You're going to want to use it in battle eventually, right?"
"I mean," said Izuku, hesitantly, feeling like he had whiplash several times over, "yes?"
"See?"
"Just help with controlling Float. Please." Mr. Yagi pressed his hands together. "Please do not pick a quirk fight with a civilian teenager. Please."
"We are on private property."
"Assault is still illegal on private property."
"He's the one who hit me!"
"I know! I'm so sorry," said Izuku, doing his best to bow in the cramped space. "It was a reflex."
"After you attacked me!"
"Yeah, but you knew I was going to do that!"
"That doesn't make it better!"
Gran Torino turned to Izuku. "Kid, I don't know how you did it, but it looks like you made this big softy grow a backbone. Next step is to see if you can get him to do this with Mirai, too."
"Um," said Izuku. "I think he already had a backbone? He's All Might, after all."
"Nah, he's just a giant spindly amoeba who needs to take better care of himself."
Mr. Yagi slumped.
"But back on topic," said Gran Torino, eyes much sharper than before. "Do you really have Nana's quirk, kid?"
"Y-yeah. I think so. It was only a little bit, during the attack, but... yeah."
"Let's see what you can do with it, then."
"Um," said Izuku.
"Gran, maybe you should get cleaned up first? Young Midoriya and I can take care of the kitchen..."
"You don't know how to turn it on, do you?"
"Not really, no," said Izuku.
"We've got our work for today cut out for us, then, don't we, you zygotes?"
Wow. Gran Torino really did call people zygotes.
Wild.
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tuulikannel · 2 years
Text
Winter Swim [assclass version]
“Karma… you don’t have to do this.”
Karma was standing by a frozen lake at the edge of a jetty, shivering a little as a few lonely snowflakes floated down from the sky on his bare skin. He was wearing nothing but swimming trunks.
“I mean it,” Nagisa said, his voice worried. “This whole idea is idiotic. I bet it’s some kinda joke played on stupid foreigners. I wouldn’t have said anything if I thought you’ll take it seriously!”
“I said I’d do it, so I will,” Karma muttered, curling his toes as he stared at the lake. A hole had been cut into the ice, big enough for swimming around a little, and in front of him a ladder went down into the water.
“Karma… please. You’ll catch a cold, or worse. Let’s go back inside.”
Nagisa was beginning to sound a little desperate. Probably, Karma mused to himself, because he was worried about what Shuu would do to him if he returned back to Japan with a human-shaped icicle.
But it was cold. He’d better make a move soon, before his feet froze into the jetty. He moved his weight a little from foot to foot. Good. They weren’t yetfrozen, it just felt like that.
“Are you going?” someone asked in English with a strong accent, and Karma glanced over his shoulder, seeing two men behind him.
“I, umm…”
“It’s alright!” A big fat man smiled at him and went by him. Karma and Nagisa watched numbly as he stepped on the ladder and lowered himself into the water, followed by the other man. They swam around a little and rose then up, seemingly enjoying themselves. The man gave Karma another smile. “It’s alright!” he repeated. “Take it easy!”
And they went back into the warmth of the sauna.
Nagisa stared after them. “These people are crazy,” he muttered. “Karma, you…”
Right then Karma bent forward and dove into the water.
...
It had all started one hot summer day, when they had been lying in the shadow in a park, drinking cold drinks and trying to survive the heat. Karma had been dreaming of winter and snow, and Nagisa mentioned something about an article he had seen online about winter swimming.
“I swear, they had cut a hole in the ice and were swimming there! There was lots of snow and people who were in winter coats, and those weirdoes just floated happily in the lake!”
“Sounds great, doesn’t it.” Karma’s eyes were half-closed and he had a dreamy look on his face. “Mmm, ice cold water…”
Nagisa laughed. “Maybe it sounds good to you now, but I bet you’d think differently when it’s cold outside. You’d be freezing!”
“I don’t know, it can’t be that bad. Sounds a lot better than this awful heat anyway!” He wiped his sweaty forehead with a groan. “I hate this! I swear, give me a frozen lake and I swim in it any time! It’s nothing to this hell!”
Nagisa snorted. “Sure. Let me remind you of that on some cold winter day. I doubt you’re so happy about it then.”
“Oh? Well, mark my words: if I ever just get the chance, I’ll be sure to give it a try!”
They continued talking of other things, with Karma still complaining about the heat, and soon enough they had all but forgotten frozen lakes and winter swimming. Until next winter, when Nagisa happened to win a week’s skiing vacation in Lapland. (“Why not, Karma? It could be fun! Besides, I really want to see the northern lights, and that’d be more fun with a friend, too.” “Why don’t you ask Kayano to join you?” “Huh? Well, she’s filming, you know. And I don’t think she cares for skiing that much.” “…you’re hopeless, you know.”) In the end, they did go there together. And one day Nagisa had pointed out to Karma that there was a place for winter swimming nearby…
“So why don’t you try it?” he’d asked with a grin. “You sounded so eager last summer.”
...
Now, Nagisa was kneeling by the edge of the jetty, staring into the water with horror, certain he was partially guilty in the murder of one of his best friends. Or if not murder, at least involuntary manslaughter.
“Karma!” he yelled. “Damn!” He glanced at the sauna. Should he go to get help?
“AAAAAAH!” Startling him so he almost fell into the water himself, Karma’s head broke the surface. Nagisa gave a deep breath of relief as his friend started splashing around in the water. “Burns! Ih… it… burns!” Karma paddled to the ladder and started climbing up, limbs shaking, panting hard.
“You okay?” Nagisa asked, panic beginning to give room for annoyance.
“Ye-yeah,” Karma stuttered. “Can’t… breathe,” he panted on, collapsing on the jetty.
“I think you’d best go in the sauna now,” Nagisa said after a while, as Karma just stayed crouching there, panting and shivering.
“Sauna! Yes. Good.” He got up and started hurrying toward the building. Nagisa stayed outside, shaking his head.
Well, at least the idiot lived. And no one would murder him for returning back home with an icicle.
It took a while, but finally Karma came back out. His skin was quite red, almost matching his hair, but otherwise he didn’t seem to have suffered any great harm. He was still wearing the swim trunks, though, and he stopped to chat happily with a couple of women, his hot skin steaming in the cold air.
“Karma?” Nagisa said, going to him. “Aren’t we going now?”
“What?” Karma paused. “Already?” He grinned. “I’m going to do it again!” And he headed back toward the lake, a happy smile on his lips and eagerness in his steps, with Nagisa staring incredulously at his back, the first pale green lights appearing on the dark sky above his head.
................................
WARNING FROM THE AUTHOR: if you ever go winter swimming, don’t do it like this! No diving, you shouldn’t wet your head. Otherwise, I do recommend it. ^^
This fic is totally cheating. You know what I did? I took my old Hikago fic and changed the names. xD That’s basically it. I think it works fine with Karma and Nagisa too. This is all because I realized I've been winter swimming only once during this winter and I really wanna go again....
11 notes · View notes
writer-panda · 3 years
Text
Hit on the groom and what became of it - chapter 2/Take me out maybe (with a sniper rifle)
Disclaimer: I don’t own Miraculous or Batman (and other DC characters). This is just a fanfiction. 
Chapter 1  -|-  Next
--------
As much as Marinette disliked the meeting with the female entourage, when the time came to start working on Adrien’s suit she wanted to scream. She could clearly see that he was uncomfortable with even the gentlest touches. She did her best to make it as non-invasive to him as possible.
They had absolutely no privacy whatsoever. The Bodyguard (Gerard; His name was Gerard) and Nathalie observed their every move. Marinette was half-convinced it wasn’t her who was under watch. 
The professional atmosphere was far cry from her usual working environment. When Uncle Jagged, Clara Nightingale, or even Diana Prince came to her for clothes, it was always very informal. They would joke, gossip, or exchange stories while she worked. Now? Now she was wary of even speaking with Adrien. 
Likewise, the boy refused to meet her eyes or open his mouth. 
At some point, when she was trying to find the right shade of white for the undershirt, she noticed a make-up stain that was not there before. 
“I’m sorry, but I will need to request you remove the makeup. It is staining my materials.” She informed Nathalie and Gerard coldly. It was all she could do to resist calling the police there and there. Sadly, the commissioner was good friends with Gabriel, so it would most likely just end her career and make it worse for Adrien. 
“I was assured it would not leave stains on materials. Please accept our apologies. We will cover the costs of destroyed materials,” Nathalie informed her in an equally cold voice.
“I see…” Marinette’s lips thinned. Inside, she was screaming. But there was nothing she could do. The hit was in place. Soon Adrien would be safe. It would go without a hitch. It had to. 
As the group was leaving, she could’ve sworn the Bodyguard gave her a mournful look. As if he shared her sentiment, but was powerless to stop it. She’d know that look. She saw it in the mirror all too often.
---------
The Wedding (even the narrator started to capitalize it) came faster than Marinette wanted to accept. And there were still no words about the kidnapping. She made sure to specify that they were to take him before he was married or no payment. Did she not make the money enticing enough? Were there already attempts that were stopped without media coverage? Maybe she forgot to check some boxes?
A million scenarios ran through her head as she wandered through the alleyways.
The whole event was happening in Gotham Botanic Garden. Whatever the weak excuse was given to the press, Marinette knew the real reason: it was one of the few places in the world where Gabriel could marry his son to Lila legally without messing with courts. And bribes were said to be cheapest there. 
As the designer for both the bride and the groom, she was invited to the main ceremony. 
Lila was kind enough to even give her a seated place… right next to Chloé Bourgeois.
Marinette had a hard time deciding if it was bigger punishment to her or the mayor’s daughter. Ultimately, the two girls did their best to not look at each other during preparations. At first, that is, because the first chance she got, Chloé to drag the designer to a remote garden gazebo in a secluded corner when she was least expecting it.
“Wha-!” Marinette was about to protest, but the blonde covered her mouth. She seated her on the bench and took the seat on the opposite side. 
“I’ve been friends with Adrien since we were kids.” She announced in the usual ‘I’m-better-than-you’ tone. “I also know that you’re not always an idiot.”
“Gee! Thanks, Chloé… I’m honored with your praise.” Marinette deadpanned, interrupting the heiress. “Now get to the point”. She really hoped her dress wasn’t damaged or she might just turn to murder. 
“Fine. You worked with Adrien on his suit.” She paused, and for a moment, just a brief moment, her mask fell. That was not what Marinette expected. She has never seen Chloé so… so… The designer’s brain lacked the word to describe how her childhood bully looked like. “How is he?” The blonde asked, her voice almost trembling. 
Marinette opened her mouth, but no sound came. 
A moment passed.
“Not good.” She finally admitted. “During the measurements, he winced even at delicate touches. Plus I was called in last week to make some adjustments to his garments. He lost weight between then and now. And he wore makeup on his right arm. On both occasions.”
“Makeup?” Chloé’s eyes widened. 
“Yes. I would’ve probably missed it if I didn’t soak my fabric into makeup removed beforehand.” She thought back fondly to her brilliant idea. 
“They hurt him!?” Chloé burst out after few seconds. “I will show those… those…”
“Believe me, I share the sentiment.” Marinette nodded sagely. She needed plan B and needed it fast. There had to be something… “I slipped him a burner phone on his way out. I doubt they found it. If it gets really bad, he can try calling the police.”
“You are devious sometimes, Dupain-Cheng.” 
“Thanks. I try.” 
“So… they are coercing him into it?”
“I think so. He is resigned to his fate it seems, but he tries to show some rebelliousness. It wasn’t his father’s idea to hire me and Lila would rather walk to the altar naked than wear anything by me.” Marinette cringed. Any interaction she had with the Liar made her feel almost dirty. And forcing politeness was physically painful sometimes. 
“I got that much from the fact he hasn’t reported it yet. That burner phone was a good move, but Adrikins was always too obedient.”
“And I’m sure you had nothing to do with it,” Marinette muttered, but Chloé didn’t hear her. The heiress somehow managed to derail her rant into telling the story of her entire childhood.
Marinette listened only with one ear, filtering the information for something useful. The rest of her consciousness focused on something else. She started to seriously entertain the idea of using Miraculous to get Adrien out. She would need a combination of several powers though. Trixx was the obvious choice. Illusions would be a great asset. Maybe the Tiger, for the Power Up? If Roaar didn’t exaggerate her power, she would be able to put a distance between them and the city before anyone even realized what happened. She would need to time her illusion right though. And there were the American Heroes to watch out for…
If she didn’t use miraculous immediately, she might get a drop on the bodyguard(s) and then make an exit using Kaalki’s power when they were alone. Disable cameras, take out the guards, get in, portal out. It was feasible but still involved too many risks. If anyone connected miraculi to the operation, Ladybug would be in great trouble. She couldn’t endanger Paris like that… not even for her partner and best friend. 
Then, there was the most dangerous plan. Don’t use Miraculi at all. She was confident enough in her skills to enter undetected. Maybe even sneak out. The question was, would Adrien make it. She could sneak him Plagg’s ring. Chat Noir would have no problem leaving any prison. But… there would be the same risk as when any other Miraculi was connected and the whole point was not to use them in the first place. 
“Ugh!” She let out an angry sound that startled Chloé. 
“What’s with you, Dupain-Cheng! Don’t you see I’m opening my heart to you!?”
“Shut up, I’m trying to do something productive.” She snapped at the blonde. 
“Why, I…”
“Silence. Your tale was entirely unhelpful. Let me focus.” 
Gotham. What was in Gotham that could help her? The most corrupt city, famous for its high crime rate, mad villains, and eternal gloominess. Even now she could feel some of it resonate in the air. As if the whole city was one big Akuma. Probably no help from the establishment… The police were more likely to put a bag on her head and deliver her to one of the crime families… 
“What in Gotham can help…” She voiced her musing loudly, causing Chloé to peak up.
“Waynes!” She proclaimed. “That serial adopter would jump at the chance to get another orphan…”
“Adrien isn’t an orphan… Yet.” Marinette grumbled. “But he will be married by then, so I would need to plan a double homicide… Meh. No great loss.” She said without a shadow of care. It was like the thoughts about the murder were completely normal for her. 
Chloé shivered. “Remind me not to get into your way when you’re in that mood.”
In the distance, the orchestra was starting to play, signaling the guests that the ceremony would start soon.
“Ugh! Hawkmoth it!” Marinette raged as she ran to the clearing. She no longer had the time and if she was the only one missing, Lila would make her prime suspect for anything that happened. Blast it. She would get one more chance. Screw the career. She could survive living somewhere in Argentina if it all went to hell. 
-------
Adrien already accepted his fate. His father and Lila made sure that all avenues of further rebellion were closed. He exhausted everything there was. 
To this day, he was grateful for that burner phone from Marinette. He made sure to hide it but always have it somewhere nearby. It became a form of a lifeline for him. A one-off save-your-life ticket. It would only work in short term, but at the rate everything was going, it could potentially save his life…
He missed his life before the mess with The Wedding started. 
Hell! He even missed Plagg’s stinking cheese. He would maim for some camembert.
“Adrien,” Gerard spoke solemnly. There was no need for more words. They both knew what was about to happen and Adrien took just a bit of solace in the fact that he was not entirely alone, even if no one could help him. 
“I’m ready.” He spoke, barely above a whisper.
Before he realized it, the ceremony was undergoing. Lila, in her stunning dress, held the attention on herself like a pro. No one even thought about looking anywhere but at them. The dress was similarly just so… Lila. It made all of her features all the more proponent. Yet, there was just a small, barely noticeable, stitch that said Marinette. A smile ghosted his face. There was some good out of this. He managed to make his friend famous. After today, no one would deny her style. 
“Should anyone present know of any reason that this couple should not be joined in holy matrimony, speak now or forever hold your peace.” The marriage officiant spoke. Adrien didn’t even care what convention the wedding was in. 
The silence swept across the garden. 
No one dared to even breathe loudly.
Adrien lowered his head. Here, the last…
There was a rustle somewhere close to the front. He looked up, a small glimmer of hope appeared in his eyes. 
Marinette was standing there, her backs straightened and one finger held up. “I…”
She felt the gaze of hundreds of guests on her. They were the most influential people in the world of modern business. Waynes. Luthor. Queen. Burgeiose. Agreste… And they all kept staring at her. 
She tried to swipe the hall with a glance, but something attracted her attention. A glint of light somewhere in the distance.
“Watch out!” She shouted, tossing a chair she was sitting on just a moment ago. 
The metal item sailed through the air until it crashed in the middle of the alley.
With an arrow sticking out of it.
For a second (which felt much longer) everyone stared at it.
Then the mass panic started. People got out of their chairs and started trying to get out of there. They trampled one another as each considered themselves to be the most important, hence first to evacuate. It was chaos.
Among the mass of people, Marinette tried her best to make it to the altar. She saw that Gerard and several other hired bodyguards were of similar minds. 
She managed to squeeze through the crowd the fastest, only to find Lila knocked out and Adrien and the Officiant missing. Adrien’s cousin (best man) and Alya (bridesmaid) were both nowhere to be found. They probably ran away. There was still no trace of the Groom. That is until she saw a giant mass of brown mud dragging the boy away. 
The sad thing? Adrien wasn’t really protesting much. 
Gerard was the next to make it through. He noticed Adrien a tad quicker and tried to chase whoever it was that tried to kidnap Adrien, but a fist made of mud slammed into him, sending him flying away. 
“Holy Hawkmoth!” Marinette cursed once more. Okay, so far, it was only a curse for her, but he deserved it. 
In the distance, police sirens could’ve been heard, but with how fast the mud was escaping, Adrien would be long gone before the police arrived. Marinette had to do something.
Wait… Why am I trying to stop the kidnapping I ordered? She suddenly questioned herself, freezing in place. 
Two guards rushed past her and started firing at the mass, but the bullets seemed to be about as effective as Parisian police when dealing with Akuma. 
The last Marinette saw of Adrien he was being taken into the sewers.
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After the police arrived, Marinette was of course first to be interrogated. (“Gee… Thanks, Lila”). They wanted to know how she noticed the arrow, did she see the attacker, how did the kidnapper looked like, and dozens of other questions. By the end, she was exhausted. Somewhere after the sixth question, her phone pinged. Luckily, the police didn’t bother with checking it and believed that it was just a worried friend. 
Not the kidnapper trying to contact their employer.
Finally, after the police released her and informed her that no further information was needed, she could contact her Maman.
“Sweety? Are you okay? I’ve seen the news!” Was the first thing that came through
“Yeah. Don’t worry. I’m perfectly fine. The police held me back for questioning a bit. I’m going back to the hotel and be back in Paris first flight tomorrow, okay?”
“Stay in Gotham! I’m coming to pick you up!” Her mother informed her.
“Wha-!? But there is no need! Seriously Maman! There’s no need to trouble yourself.”
There was a silence on the line for a moment and Marinette could feel that her mother was trying to glare at her through the phone. It worked. 
“Fine… I’m at Wayne Plaza, room 30-14.” She relented, not wanting any more arguments. She would still have several hours to sort the mess with Adrien. What could possibly go wrong?
Trying her best to be careful, Marinette left the site of crime and traveled to the industrial district. The taxi driver couldn’t be bothered less about why she wanted to go there. He just wanted to get paid and leave. 
The only-slightly-creepy aura of the completely silent area full of factories and warehouses served as a perfect background to contacting the kidnapper. Marinette, after making sure she was truly alone, activated the voice-scrambling app on her burner and dialed the number that sent her the text about successful work. Her Maman showed her that, thinking she wanted it for a prank. Or that’s how Marinette presented it anyway.
“Who is this?!” A voice on the other side of the call asked.
Marinette took a deep breath before answering. “I was led to believe you have what I wanted.” She tried her best to channel Chloé into her voice. 
“Ah… Yes… There’s been a… complication.”
“What do you mean ‘complication’?” She hissed into the phone call. 
“Um… I had the package… But then someone stole the stolen package…” Whoever that was informed her. 
“Who?” She demanded. 
“Last I checked, Lawton was the one who had ‘im… But it might’ve changed. But don’t worry, Boss… lady?” They asked. Marinette didn’t give either confirmation or scolding, so they continued. “I’m still in the game.” With that, they hang up. 
“What did I just get myself into…” She moaned. Then, the realization hit her. “What did I just get Adrien into…”
Elsewhere, Adrien was starring into a pair of curious sea-green eyes. 
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