#hurt!house | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

inkskinned · 7 months

Text

the thing about art is that it was always supposed to be about us, about the human-ness of us, the impossible and beautiful reality that we (for centuries) have stood still, transfixed by music. that we can close our eyes and cry about the same book passage; the events of which aren't real and never happened. theatre in shakespeare's time was as real as it is now; we all laugh at the same cue (pursued by bear), separated hundreds of years apart.

three years ago my housemates were jamming outdoors, just messing around with their instruments, mostly just making noise. our neighbors - shy, cautious, a little sheepish - sat down and started playing. i don't really know how it happened; i was somehow in charge of dancing, barefoot and laughing - but i looked up, and our yard was full of people. kids stacked on the shoulders of parents. old couples holding hands. someone had brought sidewalk chalk; our front walk became a riot of color. someone ran in with a flute and played the most astounding solo i've ever heard in my life, upright and wiggling, skipping as she did so. she only paused because the violin player was kicking his heels up and she was laughing too hard to continue.

two weeks ago my friend and i met in the basement of her apartment complex so she could work out a piece of choreography. we have a language barrier - i'm not as good at ASL as i'd like to be (i'm still learning!) so we communicate mostly through the notes app and this strange secret language of dancers - we have the same movement vocabulary. the two of us cracking jokes at each other, giggling. there were kids in the basement too, who had been playing soccer until we took up the far corner of the room. one by one they made their slow way over like feral cats - they laid down, belly-flat against the floor, just watching. my friend and i were not in tutus - we were in slouchy shirts and leggings and socks. nothing fancy. but when i asked the kids would you like to dance too? they were immediately on their feet and spinning. i love when people dance with abandon, the wild and leggy fervor of childhood. i think it is gorgeous.

their adults showed up eventually, and a few of them said hey, let's not bother the nice ladies. but they weren't bothering us, they were just having fun - so. a few of the adults started dancing awkwardly along, and then most of the adults. someone brought down a better sound system. someone opened a watermelon and started handing out slices. it was 8 PM on a tuesday and nothing about that day was particularly special; we might as well party.

one time i hosted a free "paint along party" and about 20 adults worked quietly while i taught them how to paint nessie. one time i taught community dance classes and so many people showed up we had to move the whole thing outside. we used chairs and coatracks to balance. one time i showed up to a random band playing in a random location, and the whole thing got packed so quickly we had to open every door and window in the place.

i don't think i can tell you how much people want to be making art and engaging with art. they want to, desperately. so many people would be stunning artists, but they are lied to and told from a very young age that art only matters if it is planned, purposeful, beautiful. that if you have an idea, you need to be able to express it perfectly. this is not true. you don't get only 1 chance to communicate. you can spend a lifetime trying to display exactly 1 thing you can never quite language. you can just express the "!!??!!!"-ing-ness of being alive; that is something none of us really have a full grasp on creating. and even when we can't make what we want - god, it feels fucking good to try. and even just enjoying other artists - art inherently rewards the act of participating.

i wasn't raised wealthy. whenever i make a post about art, someone inevitably says something along the lines of well some of us aren't that lucky. i am not lucky; i am dedicated. i have a chronic condition, my hands are constantly in pain. i am not neurotypical, nor was i raised safe. i worked 5-7 jobs while some of these memories happened. i chose art because it mattered to me more than anything on this fucking planet - i would work 80 hours a week just so i could afford to write in 3 of them.

and i am still telling you - if you are called to make art, you are called to the part of you that is human. you do not have to be good at it. you do not have to have enormous amounts of privilege. you can just... give yourself permission. you can just say i'm going to make something now and then - go out and make it. raquel it won't be good though that is okay, i don't make good things every time either. besides. who decides what good even is?

you weren't called to make something because you wanted it to be good, you were called to make something because it is a basic instinct. you were taught to judge its worth and over-value perfection. you are doing something impossible. a god's ability: from nothing springs creation.

a few months ago i found a piece of sidewalk chalk and started drawing. within an hour i had somehow collected a small classroom of young children. their adults often brought their own chalk. i looked up and about fifteen families had joined me from around the block. we drew scrangly unicorns and messed up flowers and one girl asked me to draw charizard. i am not good at drawing. i basically drew an orb with wings. you would have thought i drew her the mona lisa. she dragged her mother over and pointed and said look! look what she drew for me and, in the moment, i admit i flinched (sorry, i don't -). but the mother just grinned at me. he's beautiful. and then she sat down and started drawing.

someone took a picture of it. it was in the local newspaper. the summary underneath said joyful and spontaneous artwork from local artists springs up in public gallery. in the picture, a little girl covered in chalk dust has her head thrown back, delighted. laughing.

#writeblr #warm up #this is longer than i wanted i really considered removing that part about myself and what i went thru #but i think it really fucking bothers me that EVERY time i talk about being an artist #ppl assume i just like. had the skill and ability to drop everything and pay for grad school.#like sir i grew up poor. my house wasn't a safe space. i gave up a FREE RIDE TO LAW SCHOOL. for THIS. bc i chose it.#was it fucking hard? was i choosing the hard thing?? yes.#but we need to stop seeing artists as lazy layabouts that can ''afford'' to just ''sit around and create''#when MANY - if not MOST - of us are NOT like that. we have to work our fucking ASSES off. hard work. long and hard work #part of valuing artists is recognizing the amount we sacrifice to make our art. bc it doesn't just #like HAPPEN to us. also btw it rarely has anything to do with true talent.#speaking as someone with a chronic condition i hate when ppl are like u have it easy. like actively as i'm writing this my hands r #ACTIVELY hurting me. i haven't been posting bc my left hand was curled in a claw for the last week #this isn't fucking luck. after a certain point it's not even TALENT. it's dedication & sacrifice.#''u get to flounce around and do nothing with ur life'' is a narrative that is a direct result of capitalism #imagine if we said that about literally any other profession.#''oh so u give up 10 yrs of ur life to be a doctor? u sacrifice having a social life and u get SUPER in debt?#u need to work countless hours and it will often be thankless? well i wish i was that lucky''#we should be applying that logic to landlords ONLY #''oh ur mom and dad gave u the money to buy a house? and all u did was paint it white and rent it? huh.''

10K notes · View notes

amaya-writes · 7 months

Note

for ringtober i think it would be so funny to see the obey me brothers reacting to reader losing her ring lol i just know some of them *cough* Mammon and Asmo *cough* would be sooo dramatic

Ringtober Masterlist

Notes: I actually thought this was such a fun idea and had too many thoughts abt it so had to do hcs lol

Warnings: n/a just fluff

Characters involved: Lucifer, Mammon. Leviathan, Satan, Asmodeus, Beelzebub, Belphegor

Gender-neutral reader, you/yours

Lucifer

Highkey mad.

He cannot believe his fiance could be so irresponsible, and will state as much. His reaction and words will probably hurt, and he doesn't realise that until later.

Lucifer is out doing yet another task with Diavolo when the demon prince casually mentions how he saw you looking all over the place for your ring and you seemed quite sad.

You somehow convince Mammon to help you out since he's literally the best at finding shining things (and keeping them to himself, but he's too scared of Lucifer to steal your ring), and Solomon since he seems to have a solution for everything.

At the end of the day when it's dinner time and you're still not back at RAD trying to find your ring, Lucifer can't help but go find you.

He embraces you and says he was wrong to chastise you so harshly, your determination to find the ring showcases you weren't being irresponsible but it was just a small accident.

Lucifer isn't a very openly affectionate demon which is why he was hurt that you lost a symbol of his rare affection.

When the two of you return to HOL you're happy to discover Solomon waiting at the gate for you.

Apparently, Cerberus had been sitting on your ring the entire time. It must have slipped off when you were petting him and fell onto his dog bed.

Lucifer finds the entire ordeal sort of amusing, and you can't help but giggle too as you promise to pocket your ring before you pet Cerberus, or any other animal for that matter.

Lucifer secretly makes a duplicate of both of your rings the next day, he can't believe he didn't think of doing that before. He also thinks it would be cute to pass down the duplicates to your children.

Mammon

Is actually a little offended.

That was the first piece of jewellery Mammon acquired without stealing it. He even worked extra hard for his modelling agency to save up white money for you.

He never wanted anyone to ever be able to tell you your engagement (and wedding) ring was bought unfaithfully.

So, after putting in so much effort Mammon couldn't help but feel at least a little offended you just lost the ring.

To make matters worse you lost it because Asmo took you to get manicures and the lady over there misplaced it.

"For all we know it could be stolen by now!"

Mammon lets out a big annoyed huff and decides to give you the silent treatment for the rest of the day.

This doesn't last long and he ends up going to your room to find you, he feels sad seeing you look so dejected and decides to sort of apologise.

"Look what's done is done no point gettin' all sad bout it."

He feels worse because you seem genuinely sorry and apologise a lot.

Things end well because Asmo shows up at your room a little later with the ring in his hand. He says the receptionist found it with your wallet, which you also happened to forget there.

Leviathan

You did what?! That's it you don't love him. This whole thing was a lie, you clearly don't care about Levi or his love for you, you-

He will literally break off into the longest ramble ever and you're too scared to cut him off and make matters worse.

Levi locks himself up in his room and refuses to come out or talk to anyone. It gets so serious all the brothers are involved and you're all figuring out different ways to find your ring.

Lucifer eventually casts a spell and figures out your ring is in...Levi's room?

You storm to his door and tell him if he doesn't open it right now you won't have to find the ring because there won't be a wedding (a blatant lie, of course).

He opens it, you talk, and that's when Levi remembers he actually took your ring from you last night because he wanted to click pictures.

The ring was a custom design made to subtly match the design of the first game you played together, so obviously when Levi got a new installment of the game featuring the tiara your design was inspired by he just had to get a picture of the two together.

You were asleep on your gaming chair and he didn't want to wake you up so he just slipped it off your hand, but then forgot to give it back and just kept it in his drawer beside the game.

Mammon and Asmo couldn't help but laugh at how stupid this entire ordeal was, the rest of the brothers follow suit and then leave the two of you alone.

Now Levi's sheepish and the one apologising except he's just going on another ramble of how you probably hate him and won't talk to him but he deserves it.

Literally won't shut up until you cuddle him and tell him it's alright.

Satan

Locates it with a spell.

But first, Satan finds it so amusing how worried you are that he just has to play along and pretend to be annoyed.

If anything this whole ordeal was his fault because he was the who dragged you out to pet the street cats. In fact Satan almost lost his own ring when one of them was playing with his hand.

He has a small amused smile on his lips as you profusely apologise and insist on dragging him back to the park at midnight to try and find the ring.

Satan lets you ramble all the way there but when you two reach he realises you're getting a little too sad for his liking, so, he tells you to calm down and whips out a handy book of spells he had on him.

Ends up finding it in less than a minute, and that was a good thing too since the kitten playing with it looked like she was going to swallow the ring.

He triumphantly rescues your ring from the kitty, coos and pats her for a bit, and then return to your side with a boyish smile that almost quells your annoyance.

"You could have done this the entire time?!"

Satan lets out a genuine laugh so rare at your question you couldn't help but let your anger slip away as you laughed with him too.

He decides it's a good idea to recreate the moment he proposed to you and kneels down on one knee, slipping the ring on your finger and pulling you in for a kiss.

The moment ends up being a surprisingly romantic one you fondly retell to Asmo, who ends up gossiping about it to anyone with ears willing to listen to his squeels.

Asmodeus

Will never let you forget this.

When I tell you this man screeches.

Has the most girly squeeky yelling voice ever, in fact you actually can't even feel offended because you're too busy trying not to burst out laughing.

He's not even that mad about the ring he's more annoyed that you left him the entire day and were at Diavolo's hanging out with Barbatos and Luke.

"First you forget me then you lose the symbol of my love for you- next you'll be finding a new devilishly handsome demon to marry!"

Gets pouty. VERY pouty. Expects you to not leave his side at all until you find the ring, which is almost impossible since how could you find it if you don't leave his side?

"Well, then you'll just have to spend eternity stuck to me. I can't have you parading around without a symbol of affection, after all."

Thankfully for you Barbatos comes to the rescue, even if it's many hours later.

By the time Barbs shows up at HOL you've already spent an entire day apologising to Asmo and being by his side every second. He almost didn't let you go to the bathroom alone, claiming its nothing he hasn't seen before.

You had spent so many hours sitting on his lap idly combing your fingers through his hair or drawing random shapes on his chest you were certain you would go crazy.

Asmo didn't even let you check your DDD, which was too bad considering Barbatos messaged you about the ring almost as soon as you reached HOL.

When Barbatos drops by HOL during dinner you can't help but hug him excitedly as you thank him for finding the ring. He casually claims it was never lost in the first place, Barbatos simply set it aside after you removed it so you wouldn't get it dirty while baking.

Asmo seems almost sad to see the ring again since he doesn't have an excuse to keep you by his side anymore, but he gets over his poutyness after you suggest having a sleepover.

Safe to say you did a lot more than sleeping that night.

Beelzebub

Is probably the most calm of them all.

He asks you if you accidentally ate the ring, because he's constantly scared he might end up eating his ring.

You're kind of confused and ask him why he isn't offended or something and Beel just says he knows you would never lose it on purpose.

In fact he helps you try to find the ring so the two of you spend the entire day retracing your footsteps and having a lot of snacks.

By the time you make it back to Beel and Belphie's bedroom, which was the first place you went to help Beel wake up Belphie, you've almost forgotten about the ring.

The day just felt like a fun date with Beel and you found yourself feel grateful for having such an understanding and sweet husband-to-be.

You only remember the ring again when Belphie perks up as the two of you enter the room, suddenly reaching for a shiny object on his bedside table.

"Oh there you are, your ring slipped off this morning, I tried giving it to you earlier but I couldn't find you or Beel."

The three of you end up laughing about the situation, Beel gives Belphie some sushi he bought for him (because you cannot convince me Beel isn't that type of sibling who always gets you food when they go out) and you all just end up having a calm night in.

Maybe a movie night with loads of popcorn.

Belphegor

Looks at you with the most 'are you fucking kidding me' expression ever.

You not only chose to wake up the avatar of sloth in the middle of the day you also did it without giving him any of your usual kisses or hugs and paired that with very VERY bad news.

At this point you might as well run for your life.

The way you shake him awake almost startles Belphie but your nervous mannerisms as you just sit beside him quietly makes him wide awake.

He's now staring at you expectantly and you have no choice but to admit your mistake, which leads to a very annoyed Belphie.

"I expected better from my fiance."

Almost as mean as Lucifer if not more. Depends on how sensitive you are to such things.

Unlike Lucifer he doesn't chastise you too much, instead gives you that 'I'm disappointed in you' silence that makes you want to scream in frustration.

You knew you shouldn't have told him, but you were somewhat hoping Belphie somehow had your ring.

You end up apologising and then scramble out of his bed ready to race out of the attic and restart your ring hunt, but are tugged back by a familiar arm loosely wrapping around your waist.

"Where do you think you're going?" "To find the ring, of course." Belphie scoffs, but lets go of you to instead stand up beside you, this obviously confuses you, making him almost regret leaving his peaceful slumber for you.

"You look like you're going to burst into tears any minute. The chances of you seeing, much less finding, anything are little to none."

He sounds pretty guilty as he says it, making you smile softly as Belphie takes your hand and leads you out the room.

He almost immediately goes to Satan and just asks him to do a spell to find the ring. This not only surprises but also annoys you since you could have done that first and Belphie wouldn't even know the ring was gone.

Ends up being in the attic bathroom, you spent last night with Belphie so when you took your morning shower in his bathroom. You must have forgotten to wear your ring after you were done.

You thank Satan profusely then head back up with Belphie.

He beats you to the bathroom and slips the ring back on your finger, raising your hand to drop a tired peck on your knuckles.

"Don't lose it again." His voice is soft and he pulls you in for a quick hug with his chin resting on your head.

It's clear Belphie feels bad for snapping at you, so you two end up dozing off for the rest of the day.

568 notes · View notes