#hopefully I can get the energy to post more fanart again next year!! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

Visit Blog

Explore Tumblr blogs with no restrictions, modern design and the best experience.

Fun Fact

Women make up for the other 50% of Tumblr’s audience.

#hopefully I can get the energy to post more fanart again next year!!

greensagephase · 4 months

Note

Hi Alondra!! Thank you for replying back to me on the New Year's fanart!! there's really no pressure replying and I truly appreciate every response 🥹❤️ hearing that you still love the New Year's fanart makes me so happy!! (I promise there is more fanart for NC in the near future!!) I’m glad you took some time off social media for your mental health because that’s very important!! I’ve been quite busy lately too so I’ve been off social media more than usual this past week. I’m also happy that you’ve been sticking to drawing daily for 30 minutes!, and even if you miss a day here and there it’s still great! There are days where I just don’t have the energy to draw, so if you need to take breaks from that too it’s okay! But I really do get excited hearing these updates! Also, omg I’m very happy that you drew Miguel in a way that you liked and you’re feeling more comfortable and confident with drawing!!! Hearing that makes me so excited and i’m rooting for you!!! ❤️

Also, I just have to mention again that I’m really happy you took a little break from social media and writing, sometimes it can be too much and the last thing I’d want is for you to be burnt out from everything! (and I'm happy my little words of encouragement helped you decide to take some days off, I want to make sure you're doing okay too 🥺) you really do so much on here and you deserve the rest! ❤️❤️ Thank you so much for all the support and words of encouragement with my schooling!! (and when you mentioned getting another degree in the future- I might actually consider it!! maybe even study in a subject more for fun!) I’ve been very busy with everything and preparing for the first presentation of my capstone this Monday (the nerves are there but I'll maybe update you on how that goes! 😭) but one thing’s for sure- I still love to take the time to go on here and talk to you when I can!! And I’m so excited to read the next part when it comes out!! (please don’t stress about when you’re going to post it though 🥺) And I also promise that I read all your responses too, often times more than once because they make my day!! They mean so much to me and you don’t have to worry about replying late or anything, I understand! the weather where I live has also been arctic, haha!! (no fr today when I went out I was still shivering with all my layers 😭) and if it's also still cold where you are stay safe and warm too!! I hope you’re doing well and that you’re having an amazing week Alondra!! sending you a warm virtual hug, friend!!! ❤️✨❤️

Here are some little sketches of encouragement with your writing and everything!! a soft smiling Miguel and ok I imagine the 2nd one Miguel is giving look of like he’s proud of you 🥺 but also, he just has that signature smirk too 🤭

@sunsetdoodler thank you for being so understanding and of course, I love talking with you, so I've been trying to reply to everything!! I just got really behind on my responses 😭 but yes, I LOVE the New Year's fanart!!!

Still thinking about it and how cute your OC and Miguel look together, I can't wait to see them again (and omg, more fanart!!! I can't wait to see it but of course, take your time!!!)!! And you being off social media is so understandable with your school!! I hope everything is going well so far!! I'm thinking about you and sending you the best of luck, and hoping everything goes smoothly for you as always!!!! ❤️ Also, thank you for the well wishes on my drawing journey!! I took off yesterday and today because I've been busy doing other things but I'll hopefully be back to it tomorrow, thank you, really!! And yes omg, I've been studying Miguel (I've been studying your fanart and other lovely artists' fanart plus using the amazing drawing references I've seen on here; that's actually how I finally got his hair down haha), and feel like I'm moving forward in drawing him, but it's a working process! 😂

And thank you, omg!!!!! 🥺🥺 I was debating taking a break because I always feel so guilty disappearing from social media even if it's just a day or two, but your words of encouragement to take it easy helped and I decided to do it. I tend to feel a little off after the holidays and just feel overwhelmed by everything, so this little break really helped my mental health, and honestly - it helped my writing! I was lowkey forcing myself to write prior to it, but all is well now, and I feel great now. I've done so much more writing in two days than I did over the span of several days prior to my break, so yay!! About your schooling - of course!!!!! I'm wishing you the best and rooting for you!!! As I said already, I'm always hoping and wishing that everything goes smoothly for you!!! I hope you're taking care of yourself and that these first two weeks have been kind to you so far!!! You should def consider earning another degree for fun if you're interested!! I'd love to hear what you'd like to do if you were to get another one (if you're open to sharing, if not, I understand, so no pressure!!)!! Omg, your first capstone presentation is this Monday!! I'm sending you, and will continue to send you, all the best of luck!!! I know you got this and it'll go great!!!!!! 🥺✨ It'll be one presentation down, and hopefully it will get easier as the semester goes!!!! And thank you for taking time out of your day to come on here and talk to me, it truly means so much to me!!! Please know that I understand life gets crazy, so I totally understand if you can't reply right away or not at all (don't feel pressured to, friend!! I get it!!)!! And I'm happy that my words make your day, yours make my day as well!! I always look forward to reading your responses/asks!!!❤️ And omg @sunsetdoodler I hope you're staying warm and cozy, too!! It has been very cold this week for us (there was even a busted pipe this morning because of how cold it has been this whole week). I hope you stay warm and be safe if you're out on the road driving!!! I hope you're having a fantastic week, too and that you have a great weekend!! Hopefully you get to do some fun cozy things and relax a bit despite your presentation!!! Sending you the warmest virtual hug and the best wishes as always, friend!!!! ❤️✨❤️

And OMG THE SKETCHES!!!! Miguel saying "you got this!" - that's so ENCOURAGING!!! 🥺 And his proud face in the second sketch - stop, now I'm going to imagine that Miguel cheers me on when I write and try to draw him and the second sketch is him watching me while I do my thing,😭😭 THANK YOU, FRIEND!!!! These sketches are so freaking CUTE!!!!! And his signature smirk - everything this man does gets me, I swear!!!! 🤭 (I'd get so distracted if I saw him like this actually) I'm going to have these sketches pulled up whenever I write or draw, for real!!! THANK YOU!!!! ❤️✨🥺

#the sketches are so encouraging for real!! ❤️ ❤️#About to write for a bit and I'm going to have them displayed for inspo and encouragement 🥹#I really do think he'd be so encouraging and just watch proudly from afar like ---yeah - there they are - doing their thing 🥹#these are really important thoughts of course #miguel living rent free in our heads!!#But thank you so much!!!#I hope you're doing great friend and that everything is going smoothly!!!!!#please take care of yourself and have an amazing weekend!!!#also stay warm with this weather!!!!#asked and answered

20 notes · View notes

becausewerehere · 3 years

Photo

Hey, there! I thought I’d drop by with a little (long-overdue) update on Because We’re Here. I’ve just re-read the last devlog post (the, uh, February 2020 update) and oh gosh, it’s like unearthing a time capsule! I was very optimistic 2020 was going to be a productive year, wasn’t I? Uh. Whoops.

Like last time, please manage your expectations! :’D This isn’t a very big update at all, and it’s more talking about the process rather than the game itself - but I thought I’d check in and just let you handful of faithful devlog-checkers know that the project’s still ticking along, haha.

Act III Development Update!

Act III is taking a bit longer than I’d hoped back in February, but it’s coming along! I've been trying not to burn myself out like I did with Act II (those last few months before publishing it were rough! And took me a good few months to recover ^^;) but also, it’s obviously been a bit difficult to stay focused and energetic throughout most of this year, and I’ve had a couple of points where confidence wasn’t really in ample supply either. What a year. Hoo boy. (This probably isn’t a very professional tone of voice for a project update, but that’s fine, I’ve long since accepted what kind of shambolic operation I’m running here and I’m sure you have too. xD)

The good news is: I’ve been on a bit of a roll for the past couple of months! I'm feeling much more clearheaded while I write, and I’m starting to get back to the level of gamedev optimism and energy I had in February. Which feels great! Obviously all those other factors mean that Act III isn't going to be released in 2020 as I’d hoped, but I doubt many of you are expecting that at this point, hah. :') However, I really want to get it out in springtime. As any of you familiar with the project's development will know, I'm effectively working as a solo dev and timetables may change, so that's very far from a guarantee, but that's what I'm currently aiming for! So watch this space!

(I will also mention that, with the work that’s been done so far, Act IV is unliiiikely to take a full year after Act III, and it's very plausible that that'll also be out in 2021 (albeit late 2021). But again, I really can't talk timings with any degree of certainty just yet!)

Anyway, the main thing I wanted to say today is: I'm actually going to start this devlog up again in the new year, and open with a proper, detailed update in earlyish 2021 - looking more at where Act III (and IV!) are at that point. I’m aiming to have work on Act III almost complete and it sent off to my handful of beta-readers by then! But in any case, I’ll be able to give a much more concrete estimate of timings and so on.

It feels good to have broken the seal on posting again - this is me trying to slowly return to the world of Being Online. But for the most part, I'm staying true to my online nature (which is: hermit) and I’m going to keep quietly working on Act III for the rest of this year. And by January I’ll have done more of the programming and integrating the graphics, so I ought to be able to give some nice screenshots, and I’ll actually tell you a little bit about the act. And maybe launch the Steam page shortly after!! Exciting.

Though in the meantime, I might try and be around a little more than I have been. I was thinking of posting some more fanart up on here - I’ve had some really nice pieces come in on Discord and Twitter since Act II was released, and I’d like to keep them collected here with the rest! ;D

The Leftfield Collection

A really cool thing that happened (that I teased in the February update but ended up going a bit quiet on social media and didn’t get around to properly announcing on here) is Because We’re Here got accepted into the avant-garde Leftfield Collection showcase for the EGX Rezzed expo in London! It was supposed to be in March, but obviously fate had other ideas. Although BWH was briefly in a digital Rezzed showcase that got featured on the Steam front page and I got a couple hundred extra wishlists from it, so that was a really nice boost!

There was a neat article written about the collection on Rock Paper Shotgun here! I was very excited to go and exhibit there because I had such fun at AdventureX last November, so it was quite a disappointment that Rezzed couldn’t go ahead! But, I mean... by that point, it was definitely for the better. So, c’est la vie. In any case, I was super honoured to have had BWH selected for it, and it was really lovely to be included on a lineup with so many cool and interesting games! ^^

Alrighty, Then.

So that’s the Act III update. Thank you all for your patience! It's (QUITE OBVIOUSLY) been a strange old year. I know that a good amount of my setbacks this year have been shared by basically everyone in the world, ha. And I’m aware of how lucky I am that 'unproductivity and nerves' is roughly the extent of my 2020 troubles, so I can’t really complain. I hope you're all doing okay with everything the year has thrown at us so far.

I’ve had fewer people getting in touch and asking me about Act III than I did about Act II, and I think that’s a combination of ‘pandemic; delays understandable’ and hopefully ‘Act II left people a lot more sated than Act I’ ahaha. But fear not... Act III is definitely still on its way. And things are going well! I hope you have a good rest of the year, and I’ll update you properly (and if things have gone to plan, maybe start on a longer run-up to release this time around) next year! :D

~~~~~~

Because We’re Here is a bittersweet otome visual novel in an unforgiving WW1-inspired setting.

Acts I + II are out now on itch.io and Steam!

You can also support Studio Elfriede on Ko-Fi! You’ll help towards the cost of the new Act III artwork, and get in the Special Thanks if you’re not already~

32 notes · View notes

agentofship · 4 years

Text

One last game of Tag? Agents of Shield #PartingShot

With this tag game, I want to know the answers to these five (5) questions and then tag 5 or more mutuals. Wasn’t tagged but want to join? Join in ! Everyone is an essential part of this fandom! Name from @ agent.of.shield_ on Instagram ( @agents-of-fangirling ) who had a great idea to post a picture of yourself with a drink (or just a drink) and tag it #partingshot as a finale goodbye to the show (which I also am going to post tomorrow on IG).

I was tagged by the wonderful @ofitzsimmons and @2minutes2midnight <3 Thank you for thinking of :) And of course I’ve waited for the last minute to do it! :D

Where were you in life when you first started to watching AoS?

My life wasn’t that much different from what it is now but it’s still nice to think that I’m still in a slightly better place now. I started almost from the beginning. My friend who’s a big Marvel movies fan started watching from the beginning and pestered me for months, knowing I love the movies too. So I think I started around the mid-season break of season and quickly caught up. I came for Coulson and Ming-Na that I knew from other shows and I really liked the show from episode one but it’s FZZT who stole my heart and made me go “Oh, so this is going to be my new obsession, isn’t it?” I’ve always been a fangirl but I hadn’t been this in love with the show since X-Files from 14 to my early twenties. Back then, I was struggling a bit to make a living out of being a freelance graphic designer and illustrator and living in a tiny apartment I still have nightmares where I have to go live there again! So it was nice to dive into AoS and have a little escape from reality. To the point where it made me want to write my first fanfic ever, back around the end of season three, which was also my first step into the fandom. I really started interacting with fandom after the end of season five thanks to the wonderful @libbyweasley who was the first person who came to talk to me because I was way too shy to go and talk to people myself <3 And I couldn’t thank her enough for it.

Where are you now?

For a few years now, I’m finally able to make enough money as a graphic designer/illustrator and I even make a tiny bit of it thanks to my writing. And I think part of what has encouraged me to write more of my children’s book stories (in French) and send them to publishers is the fantastic reactions I’ve been getting for my fanfics :) I’ve also moved from my tiny apartment to a much nicer one about a year and a half ago and that has made a big difference in my life. I’ve also been able to travel a lot more and finally see the Northern Lights which has been one of the most magical experiences of my entire life. Now, traveling is what I miss the most even though I’ve been lucky to go Norway in January before this whole mess that is 2020 happened. But once again, AoS got me through the worse of lockdown and my anxiety issues. Writing and reading fanfics all with the promise that at least, we’d have new episodes in May, made things a little better. And chatting with my fandom friends on a daily basis had been a real breath of fresh air when I was locked at home for two months with only my boyfriend :D And now here I am, totally unable to focus on anything not AoS and having knots in stomach about the finale :D The last time I was this stressed out was for the season five finale. Now I have no doubt I’ll be crying my eyes out just as much but let’s hope it’s not for the same reasons :D

What character development arc (or storyline in general) did you love the most?

It’s too hard to choose so I won’t :D Fitz and Simmons. Because their storyline is so often entwined but not only. They’re typically the kind of characters I get attached to, awkward tiny geniuses who are too adorable for words and both their stories have been incredible. And I was attached from the beginning but boy, if I had any idea how they would evolve during the show. Jemma was this sweet, incredibly smart and awkward SHIELD Hermione who was always confident despite an hilarious incapability to lie or flirt. And we saw her go undercover, survive on an alien planet and become this badass boss lady and field agent. But I also loved how she went from being scared of her feelings and wanting things to be neat and compartmentalized to embracing it all. I loved seeing her ruthless in her search for Fitz because she so often pushed her feelings and needs to the side and for once, she decided to go after what she wanted and refused to be told otherwise. Fitz was the cute, comic relief of season one and ended up being probably the most dramatic character on the show. From his brain trauma to becoming a badass man on a mission to find Simmons. And then adding more layers to the character as we finally learned his backstory and got to discover the dark side of him. Of course, the writing for this character is fantastic but it wouldn’t be the same without Iain and his beautiful, subtle and always incredibly consistent way of interpreting him. I am very attached to both these characters and I’ve been wanting to give them a hug since the end of season one. Hopefully, they end up in a place where they get to enjoy each other’s hugs all the time but just because they can, not because they need it.

What will you miss the most?

Everything! Looking forward to new episodes, watching new episodes and being too excited too sleep on the night before a new one. Crying my eyes out over a very emotional scene. And also all the fandom stuff like going crazy about a tiny bit on a blurry picture and overanalyzing every interview. Coming up with ridiculous theories just for the fun of it (Hello evil LMD Jemma :D) or more realistic theories and seeing them being true. And in general, I regret not joining the fandom sooner cause it has been so much fun these past few years <3 But I know the fandom won’t die and I also look forward to many more years of fanfics and fanart and I’m looking forward to meeting some of you next year <3

Favourite quote?

I will have to go with Jemma’s quote about the first law of thermodynamics in the pod scene in 1x22. It’s a beautiful scene in a beautiful setting and the way Jemma says it in such a soft, almost peaceful voice is as heartbreaking as it is heartwarming. And it’s also very representative of my personal views on life and death and it’s really kind of reassuring. I like to think about the first law of thermodynamics, that no energy in the universe is created and... none is destroyed. That means that every bit of energy inside us, every particle will go on to be a part of something else. Maybe live as a dragonfish, a microbe, maybe burn in a supernova ten billion years from now. And every part of us now was once a part of some other thing - a moon, a storm cloud, a mammoth. A monkey. Thousands and thousands of other beautiful things that were just as terrified to die as we are. We gave them new life. Good one, I hope.

Lots of people have been tagged already but I’m gonna tag: @libbyweasley @sunalsolove @blancasplayground @accio-the-force @valentinaonthemoon @clementinewhy @springmagpies and all my mutuals who want to do it and haven’t been tagged yet, I’d love to read it :)

#partingshot #aos #aos finale #goodbye aos #i'm emotional now

11 notes · View notes

alchemist-shizun · 5 years

Text

Sic itur ad astra?

Read on Ao3!

See the marvelous fanart!

Taglist: @bookwormscififan @be-more-chaotic @logicalberry @softanxiouspatton @pushussmollworld @kim-argent-moon @jeevashun @whizzie72 @jajathelivingmeme @mylifeisadeceit @sometimeswritingsometimesdying

General taglist: (tell me if you want to be added) @whizzie72 @sapphire-knight @burningpersonflapsuitcase

Word Count: 13,024

Characters: (prince!)Roman, (vampire!)Deceit, (mage!)Remus, (kid!)Virgil, (mage!)Logan, (mage!)Patton [These are all sympathetic]

Pairing(s): Roceit, (background) Logicality

Warning(s): Violence, blood, eye and face injury, crying, kissing, toxic parenting, death mention, swearing, locking up

Summary: He could see nothing from his left eye but there was no pain, there was no adjustment to be made because it felt like he had been like that his whole life. In the middle. Between pain and numbness, recovery and illness, sight and blindness. Life and death, light and dark. Because of his condition, all that he was, also wasn’t.

A/N: Holy stars. I did it. Okay Pardon me for taking so long, I realized it was going to be pretty long and I would have never been able to write it in less than a month. This idea originated from this post, but in the end it is really nothing like the Princess and the Frog. If you want easter eggs, check the name meaning of the places! And now, I’ll leave you to your hopefully enjoyable reading.

✾

Amnemoneo Town (Former Dukedom), 1865.

« I believe we reached your destination, sir. »

« I suppose so. »

A young man stood beside the gate of a manor, which was glimmering under the blinding sunlight of a Friday morning.

Baroque keys were placed in his hands while his eyes scanned the vividly emerald gardens that looked like real crystals, and contrasted the obsidian exterior of the manor. The building, decorated with gothic features, dominated the area and stood imposing.

The dark of the night would have made the sight … eerie, for sure. The sound of the carriage taking off brought him back to his senses, he turned to raise his arm in a greeting motion.

« Take care, sir … » he couldn’t hear his name over the rumor of horses’ hooves.

His hands moved swiftly over the lock, as if he had done the same motion daily over the years, one of those things you learnt to do with your eyes closed.

With a twist, the gate was open and he followed the rocky path towards the door. His short boots touched the ground in a consistent but not loud one-two, one-two pace.

Bronze plaques and other decorations beautified the entrance; the handle, picturing a lion’s head as the banality of that age’s symbolism wanted, made the young man smirk.

« How pompous. » he mused, and wondered what kind of high power once ruled over the land. A forgotten one perhaps?

With a twist of the handle to the right and some pulling toward himself, the man was surely not ready for the wondrous sight laid out in front of his eyes.

Not only the rooms were immensely spacious, but the expensive-looking furniture, the flooring and ornaments inside together with the perfect usage of dark and light spaces, made it seem like the world and nature around it existed in function to the manor itself. As if that space had always been meant to stand for that building alone.

The heels of his boots clinked against the marble pavement, his fingertips traced invisible discontinuous lines on the voile and velvet curtains he had started to open up.

He smiled as the house started to come to life.

Exploring new spaces often had this cathartic effect on him, as if he’d locked himself in a quiet small room and he had been in need of fresh air.

And when he stepped into a room, in the far back of the house, with dark curtains covering the entrance, when he heard the slight change of sound in his steps, that was when he allowed himself to look down from the garlands hanged on the walls.

Pulling odd familiarity. It was what he felt, what he was finally aware of sensing as soon as his honey-colored irises set their glare upon the pavement.

Tiny tiles of black, orange and white were the background and a frame for a yellowish skeletal figure, seemingly facing the earth. They were giving their back to the man, venturing in the void in front of themselves.

So he smiled. The pulling energy made him slowly move closer to the mosaic, lowering himself on his knees right next to it. His hand seemed to be moving with a mind of its own, hovering over the air right above the depicted skeleton.

Lower.

He touched it and, as expected, nothing happened, except for amusement to wash over him.

Of course, what was he thinking? His fate wasn’t going to be like that, at least for a long while.

That wasn’t how beings like him ended up, trapped in a wooden box six feet under the ground. Most times, they were burned alive through howling screams of inhuman pain.

His smile faded and found himself lying next to the figure, his back on the uncomfortable tiles that dug into his skin.

Sure, he could have focused on the beautiful chandelier on the ceiling, the candles still extinguished from years of neglect.

Instead, his mind traveled toward mysterious paths and his hand went from the mosaic to his upper lip, narrowing his eyes and zoning out.

The tip of his tongue went over his upper teeth, causing his lips to part ever so slightly.

With the same hand now raised above his head, a sunray allowed itself to let his yellow glove glow into its presence. He took it off and his white skin shined along with the black of his nails.

People would have thought he’d have it burned off in a matter of seconds.

Legends were curiously foolish.

The man stood up in an agile movement, leaving the skeletal figure behind the same way the idea of death disappeared from his destiny when he had become a vampire.

« Let’s go get some sunburn. » he joked.

It was extremely painful, seeing how the gardens were practically bared of any kind of plant, the wild flowers that hadn’t yet died already wilting under the weight of their stem.

There was a saying back in his town. “Looking high and looking low”, a reminder of being aware of your surroundings in every situation.

Now, our marquis swore he had been careful.

At least, until the moment in which he only looked up at a cloud right above him, ignoring the acuminated object that he was about to step onto.

He could only face the ground before he shut his eyes in a flash and a metal object gripped half of his face, digging into his skin with a merciless push.

To that, the man contrasted a frantic pulling, removing the object as he felt a liquid substance leave his insides and spread all over his hands and face both.

If it hadn’t been for his pretty decent strength, he would’ve probably taken much longer to take it off. Then again, a human being would have been dead by then.

That wasn’t an option for him.

He clutched his face with his left hand, trembling with shots of pain, that traveled through his entire body.

Eyes squeezed shut, he stumbled in the dark and fell to his knees, seething with every doleful scream that escaped his lips wide apart.

He was hunched over himself, the sun rays hitting his exposed skin felt like violent poles through his neck, as he forced down his left arm and lowered it on his legs.

His non-injured eye tentatively opened to be met with nothing more than the contrast between his black clothes and his lavished white skin.

And …

he got blinded by something flickering on his palm. Did some of the rocks end up on his arm?

The unnamed man went for another try, shielding his eye with his free hand.

Gold.

His vision was dark and red with suffering, but all he could see was gold.

He bit hard at his lower lip, breaking it apart just enough to feel more of that same fluid flowing down. He raised his finger and wiped off some of it.

Again, gold.

His mind raced and, as he fell to the ground, blacking out of exhaustion, he came to a single conclusion.

“Royal blood.”

✾✾✾

And just like that, he was awake. The light was … dimmed. Not because grand part of the day had passed, but he felt like he was in the shade.

Well, that would have certainly helped prevent him from getting sunburnt, in the least.

Hold on a moment. Why was he lying face first in the middle of the garden?

« It’s him. » whispers came from around him, he turned his head and was met with three curious children faces.

Curiosity that soon turned into horror. Disgust.

Two children backed away and ran, like two dashing bolts of lightning, deep into the forest that separated him from the inhabited part of town.

One, though, was still staring at him.

He stared back, narrowing his eyes, confused by their reaction, the shadows that he thought he could see with his left eye – which had yet to focus on the scene – and the fact that he had barely woke from his … what? It wasn’t like he had decided to drop down and take a nap just like that.

« I know there’s someone that can help with that. » the kid in purple simple robes spoke softly, but with the typical high pitched voice of an eight-year-old.

Why wasn’t he able to see clearly from both of his eyes?

« Help? » he hoped they didn’t find out about him so quickly.

« Yes. » the boy had his hands wrapped around the gate bars, his face in between them. « For your scar and your eye. »

Everything came back to him at once, like a kick right to his teeth.

The hit, the pain, the screams.

The golden blood.

His hand went to his cheek and, even through his gloves, he could perceive the uneven section of his skin, as if someone had clawed it away. The left eye could only see shadows of the outside world.

Around him, as inexplicable as it sounds, bushes full of flowers had appeared on the grass where the blood had touched it.

So not only he was a vampire.

« Go away. »

But he now would have to also endure be called a monster.

« Now. » the urgency in his voice matched the harshness in his eyes.

The boy gave him one last glance, visibly more intimidated than earlier, and slowly walked away. He made sure to leave a certain piece of paper on the ground, though. Not because he wanted to litter, of course, the kid had manners!

It was just … in case the man needed him.

And he knew the man wouldn’t have lasted, as everything was going according to plan; before we may carry on with the marquis’ fate, we need to first introduce him.

His name was Remus, and he was a prince.

Hah.

Who are we kidding?

The name was Remus and he held the title of the most unfortunate soul of the kingdom he had wanted to forget the name of for about … as long as he’s had a conscience.

Still not convinced?

Let me tempt you to change your mind by starting from the beginning.

Remus was a duke and it was high time that he dropped in our story. Now, be mindful that we said was and not is.

The town he now lived in was once the Dukedom of Amnemoneo, which may sound familiar for our sharpest readers who were careful of our beginning statement.

Even for them, though, we need to go back to a couple of years earlier, when laws weren’t discarded and superstitions were stronger than a man’s own reason.

1839 was the rampant year of the estimated birth of the prince of Ameleia, an event which was awaited by all the people with profound trepidation: the face of the future ruler had always been a privilege for the world to see as soon as the opportunity presented itself.

What they didn’t know, though, was that they would have been blessed actually by two princes that year. What was wrong with that?

They were twins.

In the kingdom of Ameleia, during that particular age of radical puritanism, having twins was the equivalent of selling your soul to evil external forces of hell.

The thought of the good and evil twin, the angel and the literal Antichrist, it was so deep-rooted in the souls of the people that, despite the royalty’s awareness of how fake those beliefs were, the two brothers were forced to separate.

One destined to be a prince, the other to be the duke of an inconsequential land of the kingdom.

The good and the evil.

Only that, the dukedom wasn’t exactly … standing out in any field. Misery had started to pour down on its citizens which led to, eventually, fall into the pit of seemingly non-existent lands that the kingdom had forgotten about.

The sovereigns had also tried to forget Remus.

Judging by how often they made sure he was still alive, which was zero times since they parted ways as he was still a child to be raised by servants in the dukedom’s manor, they had probably made it, too.

So, just like that, when misery had devastated the town so much that any existent title fell and Remus found himself at sixteen locked out of his manor behind the woods, the servants declared their retirement to major families and parted ways with him once and for all. But most of all, he felt the utmost loneliness.

People in town didn’t know much about him, he was aware of his condition, but had always been refrained from talking about it with anyone other than the servants in the building he hardly ever left.

Until one day, around his- their eighteenth birthday.

He had tried his best to survive in the oblivion of poverty, he lived in an abandoned shop; Remus wasn’t exactly aware of how many rats he had crossed paths with while stumbling around the tiny rooms. Not to mention the cats that, seldom, decided to invade his vital space and scare him out of his life when they woke him up by hopping on his chest.

He should have considered windows, had there been any shop of that kind in town.

Don’t even get the people started on food, the subject that made the worst come out of them.

He had tried to go out in a moment that wasn’t the dark of the night. It didn’t exactly go as he had wished.

In front of him, two imposing royal guards blocked his way out of the door. Their faces edgy, expressions hard and eyes dull. It took him a moment to recognize them. Were they going to take him back? After all those years of neglect?

He flinched as both the men unsheathed their swords at him.

« Woah, nice to see you again, too. »

« Silence! » now who were they to behave like that in front of a person of such importance?

« Excuse me? Alright, I might look raveled but a couple of years rotting would do that to anyone. Even a prince like m- »

« Silence. » another repeated.

And hit Remus in the stomach with the hilt of his sword-

The boy contorted with pain with a hand on his stomach and the other on the ground, to alleviate his fall.

His mind raced trying to give himself a reason for their attitude. Two soldiers in disguise? Had he done something illegal? Did they mistake him for someone else?

His ears were ringing, but the only thing he actually heard was his mind going why, why, why, why?

« The royalty is coming. »

Remus regained that tiny bit of strength to look up at them and spoke with a broken voice. « Y-You mean my parents? »

A kick came to his face and he decided against speaking any further.

« Prince Roman is going to visit the Royal Manor, too. »

Oh, and who exactly cared? Just another name in the “people that turned their back on you their whole life” list.

Why was he bothering to show up after eighteen years?

« And you, » the taller guard leaned down, spitting out his words. « Won’t be allowed out of this place until he leaves. Clear? »

Remus could only eye him from the ground he had been trying to get up from. « Crystal. » he muttered, without missing his sarcastic tone as the two men left.

So his parents were embarrassed of him to the point of not showing up in his presence? Big deal. Who cared?

He ended up spending a week of almost literal imprisonment before he was let out.

There was no living soul able to tell how he managed to survive. The boredom, though, had brought him to actually clean the place around for once and find out about its origins.

It happened when a singular book stood out of a shelf, as if eager to be picked up. Remus did as it desired. Pages flipped in front of his eyes before he had been able to touch a single scrap of paper and he was directed to a particular segment of a paragraph which seemed to be handwritten years earlier, before the former owner left the place.

Magic antiques were the only readable words.

After some looking around – and a myriad of unrecognizable unknown objects inside cabinets – he decided he was going to get to the bottom of it.

Thus the years spent into mastering the Art of Transfiguration all the bookshelves of the abandoned shop seemed to offer.

Of course, mistakes happened almost constantly at first, especially the permanent one that turned a streak of his hair white: he had been trying to recite a formula to turn one of the rats into an inanimate object.

He ended up transforming himself into a white animal, but that was beyond the point and he wasn’t going to bring that up to anyone. He’d have preferred to fake a heart wrenching and tragic backstory.

And, well, when he heard of the northern man coming to town on the same period of time as Roman used to yearly come back for some reason, when Remus learnt to automatically lock himself in his shop, an idea dawned on him.

And with it, he was sure he was going to get his Manor back.

That was the reason why, when he saw a boy in purple robes walking with a couple of kids in the deserted streets, mumbling about the gossip going around on the newcomer, he carefully approached with a piece of paper in his hand.

« Hello there, children. » he crouched down at their eye level. « Do you want to know a secret about him? »

And children? Well, they were far too gullible. What was even better about it was when fate was on your side; fate that, in that moment, had the name of a certain metallic trap he had left in the middle of the manor’s garden he hadn’t seen in years.

Everything was falling into place.

✾✾✾

Just like Roman thought earlier that day as both he and the newcomer had just arrived in town.

He had been walking around towards a lesser known path he used to take to reach a certain family’s residence.

That was when Roman saw him, standing next to an open carriage led by a pair of black horses that seemed to sternly stare him down.

He was … odd. Unlikely to be common part of the citizens, the man stood out compared to the commoners roaming in the streets and he was unable to tear his eyes off of him.

Unknown, however, kept his back facing the prince, as he helped the coachman heave up a bag on the carriage. He moved with delicacy even while stretching his muscles.

Roman wondered for a moment if he were living some kind of lucid dream.

Since there was no way for him to turn his head 360°, he forced himself to keep his gaze straight ahead and forget about that crystalline laughter he just so happened to overhear while walking on to other side of the road.

And, oh, what a particularly handsome look he portrayed with his features and-

Right, the household.

Blood that just overflowed left his cheeks and he crossed the hidden path: it was pretty weird how none, apart from the family he was about to visit, in that town seemed to recognize him. Still, his parents were always eager to remind him to let himself be seen the less he could, ever since he had decided to travel to Amnemoneo alone.

« Ro-bro! »

Roman’s head snapped up and a huge smile automatically spread on his lips, recognizing whose voice it was in an instant. He was only able to see a flash of purple running towards him as tiny arms were lacing around his waist.

A kid’s face looked up at him, big lilac eyes boring into his own.« You’re back! »

« Of course I am, Vivi. »

« I told you not to call me that. » the kid whined, frowning at him and loosening a bit of his embrace.

« Alright, alright, as you wish, my lord. » Roman lowered only to pick him up from under his shoulders.

« That’s a better title. » no ten-year-old should have been able to have that kind of sarcasm.

Roman scoffed. « I should tell Logan and Patton to stop spoiling you. »

« Falsehood! »

The prince couldn’t help but laugh as the kid mimicked his father, failing in sounding as serious as him. Roman held his hand out to the boy.

« Come on Virgil, let’s go in. »

✾✾✾

He loved visiting his friends. When he surpassed the limit between the street and the gate of their property, a welcoming warmth washed over him and he felt at home, like he’d always belonged there, a mystical comfort that eased up whatever worries concerned him.

Patton was to blame for picking up a few tricks from his wizard husband, for sure.

Roman knocked on the door and it didn’t take long for Patton’s arms to be wrapped around him with a gasp.

« Woah, hey buddy. » the prince stumbled backwards before releasing his friend.

« We sensed you were coming. » Patton confessed, pointing behind himself where Logan was standing, smiling and waving a hand in their direction.

Roman waved back, amused. « I literally can’t hide anything from you, can I? »

They invited him, basically being pushed and pulled by both Virgil and Patton, excitedly, towards a certain cake they all helped to make (especially Virgil for the little precise decorations.) in honor of his birthday.

Everything in their home sparked a magical energy: Logan had always been a mage in the shadows, careful not to be discovered thanks to his profession as biologist and doctor, in some way. After Patton made his way into his life, magic started being part of him, too. The barrier around their home was his doing, it kept away people with malevolent intentions and let the other ones be welcomed in a soft invisible embrace.

As for Virgil … they didn’t really talk about that. Roman knew something about a scientific experiment and a reject they found. He knew they had saved him and given him a life. But the kid wasn’t ready to know the truth yet, so it wasn’t a topic to bring up.

« Oh, speaking of which. » Logan lowered the cup he was bringing to his lips. « Did you hear of the marquis moving to town today? »

Roman snapped back to reality. « He’s a marquis? »

« You saw him?! » Virgil leaned forward with wide eyes and curiosity written all over his face.

All gazes were set on him. « Well, I believe I might have seen him before coming here. » the memory of the man’s figure flashed in his mind. « He didn’t look like he was from town. » Roman didn’t mention his other considerations.

« Are you going to marry him? »

Children and their perfectly embarrassing questions. But there was definitely nothing awkward about it, was there? He didn’t even know the man.

« Calm down, Vi, that’s not how it works. » Logan softly pushed him back against his seat to sit up straight.

« But he has a title, like Ro-bro. Isn’t it logical? »

He smiled. « Well- »

« You have to admit, » Patton chimed in, repressing a giggle. « Virgil has a point. »

Virgil turned to Logan with a toothy grin, a silent “see?” was understood between the two of them.

« Why don’t you ask Roman about it? »

« Yes. » the prince admitted with a defeated sigh. « I was planning on bringing him here to announce our engagement but you had to ruin that! » he faked an accusing tone.

« That’s what you get for betraying me! You said you were going to make me a prince. » Virgil pouted and Roman really had to stop himself from pinching his cheeks.

He stood up and approached him, crouching down next to his seat. « Let me tell you a secret. » he began stage whispering. « I can still do that, when I am king, you can become my prince son! Come with me and run away from these two oldies. »

A chorus of “excuse you?” followed with the other two’s laughter.

As hours flew by and Virgil left to play with some friends, Roman found himself back at the front door, which was being held for him.

« Are you sure you don’t want to stay and eat something? » Patton searched the prince’s face with instinctual concern.

« You know it’s not a problem for us to conjure a seat for you. Or anything else, if you desire to stay. » added Logan, with a tone softer than usual.

Roman had always found endearing how protective they were of him: before they settled in Amnemoneo, they used to meet each other quite often. Logan and Patton seemed to be on every path Roman had to cross and, eventually, they grew attached to each other.

Then again, the prince visited their town every year around his birthday, in a sort of tradition, to have a little theatrical representation in his honor.

Only that he had to be given permission to occupy the manor, so …

« I must go to the town hall, to check the availability of the building, same old required formalities. » Roman half-smiled. « Thank you, regardless. »

And exchanging goodbyes, off he was, unaware of the fact that he had to make yet another trip to the building which was occupied by our beloved marquis.

✾✾✾

A beloved marquis who had left that same building a couple of hours earlier than when the prince had gone to the town hall.

He was … defeated. So, he surrendered to the will of persuasion and picked up the piece of paper left at the gates by the purple clothed kid.

A visiting card?

Looking like this, it was unlikely for him to show himself with the sun still shining up above in the surprisingly limpid sky. It would have rendered his scarred face just as clear to the ones roaming mindlessly in town.

For some reason, most of the population seemed to aimlessly wander about all the time, in a state of daze.

Was anybody actually going to notice his presence at all?

As if pulled by an outer force that had already made up his mind, the man crumpled up the paper card in his hand he clutched to his chest and moved through the forest like it was his second home.

He dragged his feet between the crunch of autumn leaves and the damp grass still suffering from the rain of the day before. His fingertip brushed the injured side of his face a second time.

And he felt nothing.

He could see nothing from his left eye but there was no pain, there was no adjustment to be made because it felt like he had been like that his whole life. In the middle. Between pain and numbness, recovery and illness, sight and blindness.

Life and death, light and dark.

Because of his condition, all that he was, also wasn’t.

So when he hurt himself to the point of almost mortally wounding himself, he also didn’t. The bleeding stopped in no time and the injury only left an ugly mark.

But, of course, on top of that, he had to discover he had golden blood. Royal blood, which meant not only sharper senses and abilities than average of his kind, but also an overly deadly power roaming in his insides.

Maybe that was why, years earlier, that old woman inexplicably died the day after she wiped his face clear of tears and offered him shelter. One of the many places he had to run away from.

The marquis had no time to ponder about his condition, as his feet stopped right in front of the entrance of his destination.

« Well, well, well, what have we here. »

He looked to his left and saw a man hanging upside down from the opened window, looking amused in his direction.

« I didn’t expect you so soon. You didn’t leave me time to make myself presentable! »

In all honesty, he had to agree. That other man looked … absolutely disheveled, as if he had dressed in the dark and hadn’t looked in a mirror for a lifetime.

Not that most of the citizens here didn’t send the same aura.

He looked down to the visiting card. « You’re Remus? »

« The one, » he began, moving swiftly from the window to the door he opened right after, stepping aside to let the man see the desert inside. « And lonely. » he theatrically bowed.

The marquis was then pulled in by Remus, who shut the door behind them and led them to a counter at the centre of the modest room.

« Now, let’s see. » he flipped through the pages of an enormous tome. « A curious spell for our particular vampire. »

The man’s eyes widened in shock.

« Wh- » he was met with a smirk. « How- » the marquis backed away, the utmost fright rising in his chest. His back touched the shelf against the wall.

« Aw, now, fear not, my dear foreigner. » Remus let the door open with a swift movement of his wrist. « You can leave, if you so desire. »

The newcomer eyed him warily. There was no way that wasn’t a trap.

Remus tilted his head and contorted his mouth. « You don’t want to? Fine with me. »

« Wait. »

« I’ll make you leave … as a newer person than how you entered! »

The marquis’ eyes were blinded by a flashing light that seemed to have completely devoured him.

He felt his body shrink, twist and contort under the weight of a thousand formulas that were operating on his form.

A thundering headache caught his forehead and he curled on himself until he couldn’t feel his limbs anymore, his eyes squeezed shut.

When he was able to open them again, he recognized exactly in what condition he ended up.

Remus had turned him into a bat.

But wait, he was already able to do that, what was the usefulness behind that?

He tried to get back to his human body.

And tried.

And tried again.

Nothing happened.

Dear god.

« Hope you enjoy your whole new life, special costumer, and remember, » Remus managed to drive the bat out of his shop. « No take-backs! » he slammed the door shut.

And the marquis flew away frantically for his life, which was probably going to change forever.

Only that he didn’t know it was because the encounter he was about to have at the manor.

✾✾✾

Gosh, that was inconvenient!

Roman played with the lock at the gates, going over the bass-relief decorated on top. The consistency of the material noted that a very long time had passed since someone had inhabited the place. Yet, now there seemed to be someone?

Waiting for them was the right thing to do and not totally creepy, right?

Ri-?

Like a flock of ravens storming away in the morning from the local farmer’s terrain, Roman heard an erratic drumming of wings toward his general direction and ducked whatever was coming down at him.

There was a thud and a screech before the prince was able to spot a barely moving bat lying painfully on the ground.

« Oh. » Roman stood in his place for a few seconds. « Oh, dear. » he crouched down next to the animal, which appeared to be a diurnal bat.

Perhaps it had gotten lost?

« Hey, little one- woah! » it tried to move, as if in fear of his presence, when Roman’s hand motioned toward its body.

He examined it to look for a way to heave it up and his eyes fell on the left wing. The broken tissue was tangled in a leaf on the ground.

« Oh, you poor thing! » there had always been this complex but profound understanding when it came to animals: he felt like they had some kind of connection with him.

As he leaned over the bat, he could almost feel its pain. He had to help.

Roman tried to pacify it by speaking softly, while he attentively eased it in his hands. He had a single place in mind.

« No panic, little friend. » he whispered, mostly to himself, biding his farewell to the manor and the unseen marquis behind himself. « We’re going to get you all better in no time. »

He had to find Logan again.

✾✾✾

« Did you change your mind? » Patton abruptly cut off as Roman stormed into his and Logan’s home for the second time that day.

« I require a hand. » the prince announced, approaching Logan who had been eyeing him since he entered the room. « A scientific one, if that’s possible. » Roman added, showing the animal cupped in his hands.

The bat tried to stretch both wings, failing miserably.

« That’s odd. »

« Huh? »

Logan searched for something specific none but him could name. « This is an adult bat and yet he seems to not have adjusted to his body entirely. » without taking his eyes off the creature, he moved them both towards the table Logan used for his experiments and works. « Furthermore, there’s no such thing as bat hunting here. And yet it looks like something might have scared him. Plus, there are no bats around here. »

The animal was laid on a piece of cloth on the table’s surface and the doctor started taking his tools out.

A pair of curious eyes stared from the other side of the room.

« Do you want to assist, Virgil? » Logan looked at him with the corner of his eyes, offering him a smile. The kid beamed and rushed to his side, while Roman observed their work from the other side of the table, Patton joining them shortly after.

« Be careful, please. » Roman stared in anticipation at the bat, as if expecting to feel pain in an empathetic sort of link.

Logan stopped and glanced at him through his glasses, a grin on his lips. « You still emotional over animals? »

« Shut your mouth and do your magical science. »

Though he was baffled at the oxymoron, Logan complied regardless, with Virgil handing him what he needed at his side.

It didn’t take long before Patton and Virgil were the only ones left in the room to tend to the creature as the other two discussed the happening over coffee.

« Could you imagine if he could talk? » the kid abruptly turned to his father. « He would tell us what he was escaping from. »

Patton made a humming sound, considering the idea. « Well, there might be a way. » he conceded, opening a small notebook and flipping through the pages. When he found the right spell, he turned to look at his son.

« Just for a couple of minutes, okay? » a mischievous but child-like smile formed on Virgil’s lips, satisfied.

That one was the exact moment in which all of our stories converged.

With Patton’s magic flickering in the room and toiling with the chains of the incommunicability between two beings that don’t talk the same language.

« Hey, Mr. Bat, you can talk now! »

« Oh, can I? » a sarcastic satin voice broke the anticipation. « Wait. Was that me? » the marquis’ day was already so weird, that might as well have happened too.

« This is so cool! It worked! » Virgil leaned enthusiastically over the animal, which was questioning the insanity of his earlier choice. Not that he could do much else.

« What worked? » Logan’s voice sounded hurried across the room.

« Oops. »

Patton revealed a sly smile to his husband, pretending they did nothing big like giving a previously non sentient creature the ability to speak.

At least they thought he wasn’t sentient before.

« What’s going on? »

« Virgil? »

« Patton! »

« Excuse me! » all those present turned their heads toward the source of sound, who was none else but the animal himself. « I believe I might be the most perplexed one in here. »

Logan sighed deeply and approached the table. « I apologize … » he stopped, unsure of how he should have carried on. « How do you address a bat? »

« Let me do the talking. » Roman shoved him aside, the buzzing feeling of his connection to the animal lingered. « Greetings, amiable creature. It just so happens that- »

« It’s you. » the bat stared intensely in Virgil’s direction after heaving himself up the best he could.

« Huh? » was all the kid could say.

« You gave me the card. You told me he would have helped. I wouldn’t actually call this helping, you know? »

Then, it dawned on Virgil. « You’re the marquis? »

« Precisely, somehow. »

Everybody’s behavior seemed to change at that; the kid realized his mistake, Roman slowly backed away in sudden shyness while Patton and Logan connected the dots.

« You sent him to Remus? » both of them demanded in unison, surprised. They had warned him plenty of times in the past not to approach the man’s shop: it wasn’t exactly because they believed him to be wicked, as they had never interacted, but any magician was at war with another unless stated otherwise. It seemed to be an unspoken rule, none was to be trusted.

« You know him? » the man, now bat, felt hope rise in his chest.

« Barely. » Patton admitted. « His shop has this weird peculiarity which causes it to change place within the town every day. He doesn’t seem to be bothered, but it’d surely be a pain to find him now. »

If bats could sigh in defeat, the marquis had just done that.

« Let’s start from the beginning. » Logan gathered some chairs with a swift movement of his wrist. « What exactly happened to you? »

Ah. That was going to be fun.

How to tell your story in detail while leaving out the plot points that determine that you’re a vampire while talking to four most likely intelligent people that could connect the dots in no time?

Truly a piece of cake for our favorite man of town, wasn’t it?

I came here, I contemplated my dead life on a mosaic, I injured myself with- I actually still have no idea what it was, a bunch of children saw me, your son handed me this visiting card, I went there and this charming guy had the nerve to transform me into a bat to solve my aesthetical issue.

Nailed it.

Okay, maybe that wasn’t exactly what he told them, but it was around there more or less.

Fortunately, they didn’t ask further questions; the real issue presented itself when Logan pointed out the hex Remus had thrown on the marquis was too powerful for his own magic.

After some discussing, they resigned to having to find him and force him to reverse the spell. Of course, in the meantime, Roman was the one to offer himself to help the bat in their mission.

« Oh! Are you going to marry him as a bat now? »

Roman sprinted out of the house with the animal in his hands as he heard a “What was that?” coming from him.

✾✾✾

« It must be tough, this whole situation I mean. To you. Finding yourself randomly flying at once. » Roman had no idea where all his eloquence had gone to, while he kept the bat steady on his shoulder.

They were on their way to the manor, just a few meters away from the gates, so that they could have made their plan to reach Remus while also arranging the place for the theater production.

Which was also never going to take place.

But Roman didn’t know that.

« Not really. » the marquis responded. « It’s easy to adjust to this condition. » he also was quick to add, as there were no means of explaining to the prince of the truth about his identity.

Mostly for his safety.

« Well then, that’s good. »

Awkward silence followed until the gates presented themselves to their eyes, now only a meter away. Of course, as the man’s body disappeared with his belongings, the key was gone too.

He guided Roman to a clearing in the bushes he had noticed before the inevitable had happened.

« Oh! That’s pretty. » the prince immediately marched towards a group of flowers seemingly put in a random disposition.

The marquis didn’t remember them being there.

He did remember golden blood, though.

« Wait! »

Roman halted altogether, confusion written all over his face. « They’re not going to eat me, sir. » he commented, as he crouched down in front of them.

« Please, you need to listen to me. » an urgent tone filled the silence of the gardens. « They weren’t there before. » an half-lie. « Knowing what happened to me, we better not touch anything else. » to preserve oneself.

Still baffled that simple plants could hurt anyone, Roman complied and slowly rose to his feet. His new direction was the wooden doors and, ultimately, that one very comfortable-looking sofa right in the middle of the vast living room.

The bat was placed on top of the coffee table and Roman leaned forward with his elbows on his knees to give him more attention.

In all honesty, he knew that was actually that tremendously handsome marquis he saw earlier that day, but gosh darn if he didn’t have the urge to pet the little animal every time he looked at him. Not his fault if he looked soft, now.

The prince cleared his throat. « Alright. The production can wait until we’ve found a way to turn you back. What do we know about Remus until now? »

« His spells are irreversible unless he’s the one to break them. »

« No asking Logan or Patton for help, then. »

« His shops shows up at random places at random times. »

« Unpredictable locations, we’d need to search the whole town every day. »

« He also looks a bit like you. »

Roman did a double take. « I’m sorry? »

If bats could shrug, the prince was sure he had just done that. « I’m just stating what I know about him. » he was given an odd look. « Don’t you worry, your majesty, you still win in attractiveness if that concerns you. »

And there Roman was, getting flustered because of a bat.

A handsome bat in person though.

He meant the person, of course.

Was he ever going to stop thinking about-

« I’m sure you do, too. »

« What was that? »

What the hell, Roman?

« Nothing! » he dramatically got up opening his arms. « So yeah, planning. »

« Sure. » the man didn’t sound convinced.

« The moment you heal your wing, you could fly up above the place so we can find the shop sooner. Until then, I could stay here and keep the rumors about your disappearance down by focusing the chattering on me, rather than you. »

« Am I wrong to believe you have a natural instinct of putting yourself in the spotlight or …? »

« Absurd. I am merely sacrificing my image to protect yours. » the ghost of a grin painted Roman’s lips.

« Oh, I am more than honored to be blessed by such generosity. » a giggle filled the room.

« I will grant you my protection. »

« I must thank you for your kindness, your Royal Highness. »

They would soon find to absolutely love that kind of bantering.

✾✾✾

Things … developed from there.

Between walks in town, with the bat rigorously on Roman’s shoulder and his claws gripping tight on his clothes, talks about their favorite interests.

Chasing.

They had almost made it once. They had seen a suspicious figure roaming in the narrowest streets. The man they saw had immediately pulled up his hood at their sight and vanished in the darkness of a dead end.

Underwhelmed by the event, they had called it a day and withdrawn to the manor.

That was when the marquis found out Roman actually recited lines from plays he had never heard out loud when dreadful feelings caught him.

He would lie on a mattress and throw an arm over his eyes. Then, his voice did the magic. He didn’t even need his body to express his emotions, already clear with the tone he used.

And yet, he whispered. He almost only mouthed them, but in his head, they were perfect.

To the bat’s ears, they were divine, to say the least.

Theatre was something they occasionally talked about, starting from the production that should have taken place in that very building, to every little piece of memory Roman held dear of plays he’d seen in his past.

He noticed his eyes shining bright as he jumped between different specks of his life, the excitement in his storytelling intensified every day more.

And with it, also the marquis’ … appreciation for the prince.

All the little details changed in his point of view as the weeks fled.

For instance, goodness, did he like his singing.

It was as if Roman went from reciting troubled monologues when sad, to singing his heart out in his happiest moments. And it was beautiful.

« Hold me. Whatever lies beyond this morning is a little later on. Regardless of warnings, the future doesn’t scare me at all. Nothing’s like before. »

When his wing had started to heal so much that he could fly a little, he often rushed to reach the prince and see the show.

And at some point, especially as Roman noticed him, he started partaking in them too.

Although he didn’t have a single idea on how acting worked and often ended up just mesmerized by Roman’s voice and the beauty that shined in him when he explained plots and intricate points with a fiery passion.

If somebody had asked him, he wouldn’t have been able to tell which was the exact moment where he developed feelings for the young prince.

Maybe upon hearing his giggling in the forest, while walking towards town. Maybe when he discovered yet another of his talents. Or maybe when he mixed singing with acting in the most splendid of exhibitions he had ever witnessed.

He had definitely come to terms with it when a thought dawned on him, the thought of having to leave him once his body was back. It ate away at his stomach, it was as if something inside him told him he should have stayed that way forever, if it meant keeping the prince by his side.

He didn’t want to lose him anymore.

Getting his body back would have meant having to part ways forever. The marquis knew he had to leave as soon as he could have. And it simply and utterly sucked.

He also knew he should’ve gotten rid of those feelings, none would have agreed to keep up with his lifestyle anyway.

Constantly on the run and go.

As he watched him dance alone in the mosaic room, he recognized that no, that wasn’t going to happen anytime soon.

✾✾✾

For Roman, it was a little different.

Sure, he had always thought that the bat looked kind of adorable, but he couldn’t shake off the realization that he had seen the marquis’s human body. He knew what he looked like and it was kinda like he was hugging him constantly when he kept him in his hands, close to his chest.

And it wasn’t like he actually wanted to change that, once the issue was over.

Though, the thought of that made his heartbeat a tiny bit faster than usual, which made him an awful lot more flustered, as if he had just told the person concerned.

The feeling didn’t vanish with time, but only strengthened.

He couldn’t even imagine his baffled expression as the marquis trailed off in one of their conversations as he started talking about issues deep within the human soul.

The bat’s immense knowledge of both psychology and philosophy was to be admired, maybe the biggest Roman had ever encountered even between the royals around him.

There were some literary circles, but sometimes human sciences were frowned upon and the royalty was denied any kind of education on them.

« Roman? » the marquis had called out to the man lying on the couch in front of him.

Who was, at the moment, inexorably asleep with his face in his arms.

He was going to apologise about that for the rest of his life, but hey, when you’re tired, you’re tired.

It was also pretty endearing how he woke up to a blanket messily laid onto his body.

What demoralised him, despite all the giddiness in his stomach, was when he noticed the marquis seemed to be keeping something from him. Nothing he could pinpoint exactly, yet he knew there was a topic he brushed off.

Mostly when he talked about his family.

Nothing came out of those conversations, which led Roman to think of the worst: he couldn’t imagine what kind of relationship he must have or have had with his parents, or what sort of situation he was in.

What he was sure about was that he felt for him.

Felt happiness around him, empathy when the other was down, sorrow in words never spoken but events that had already happened and scarred the marquis’s heart.

He felt way deeper than how he felt for other people.

Thus, he could recognize that, ultimately, he fell for him, too.

✾✾✾

When you look for the perfect sign, you tend to withdraw until the right occasion presents itself.

« Goodness, » Roman laughed quietly in the kitchen, turned to the cupboards on the wall. « It seems people started spreading rumors about me being a vampire because they saw you on my shoulder. »

And when that happens, an anxious buzzing starts shaking your insides.

« That … would be a shame. » the bat looked down, unsure of his own words.

« Why would that be? » Roman turned with curiosity. « Sure, I’d lose some colour, but heightened senses? Amazing powers? »

« That depends. »

« How so? »

« Blood chaste. How you were turned. The assets of the vampire that turned you or gave birth to you. »

The prince smiled through pursed lips. « Seems like someone read a dark ancient book from the Index of forbidden books. »

« Well … » and the buzzing grew louder. « I can talk from experience, too. »

He waited for the realization to hit.

« W-wait. Do you mean you met them, or …? »

He sighed the same way a bat could. « It is not a curse, Roman, you can say it. But yes, the latter. »

What he was also waiting for was fear. Disgust. Rejection. Anything but whatever crossed the prince’s mind.

« Oh my- »

« I know- »

« -I haven’t been giving you proper food for weeks! »

What now?

The man wasn’t sure whether he thought it or actually said it out loud.

« How long can you go without blood? It’s been six weeks tomorrow, oh dear, you must be starving. » Roman put his hands on his hair. He had this instinctual habit of worrying for others’ well-being before actually thinking rationally about the situation around him.

Maybe it was his princely duties to make him think that way, maybe he really didn’t want to think about the wonderland he felt like he stepped into when he realized he fell in love- he fancied a vampire.

Actually, a myriad of thoughts swirled in his head.

« I- No, I’m perfectly fine. My blood chaste is the highest, meaning I can go a very long time without drinking. »

« Oh. »

« You don’t have to … worry? » the marquis tried.

“But I always worry about you” was what Roman wanted to answer.

« Are you, like, some kind of royal in your chaste? » that was when they started traveling down dangerous paths.

« Sort of. I only just found that out, when I bled because of the garden trap. » the marquis remembered how confused he felt at the glimmering liquid on his hand.

Roman’s voice and expression both softened up. « You … don’t know who turned you? »

« Honestly, I only have a name. It’s kind of complicated. »

« Very well then, » Roman placed a cup of hot flaming tea on the surface of the table, not too far away from the bat. He sat down. « I’m willing to understand. »

The marquis took a deep breath and paused, sorting out the thoughts in his head.

« I’m from a country in the north. You may think I’m wealthy because of my title, but its value is actually nonexistent. My parents barely had anything to survive and … well, when they felt their life slowly fade away, they knew I wasn’t going to make it on my own. Barely anyone in my town would have been able to. »

« Apparently, they had someone they could rely on. The only thing I know is his name is Thomas … » he paused. Maybe he should’ve gone to look for him ever since. « They had told me to open a box as soon as things went wrong. Inside, I found a vial and a letter with all the instructions. I followed them and prepared myself before, well, committing to the act. After that, I learnt everything I needed to know and started to look for different places to stay. »

The bat seemed to shrug. Roman had now his arms crossed on the table and his face half-buried in them, paying careful attention. He also wanted to hide the frown in his face.

« And now I’m here. »

« I wish- » the prince instantly commented, rising from his slouched position. « I don’t know. I just wish we would take better care of every single spot under our reign. »

« Roman. » the marquis spoke in a reprimanding but softer tone. « Both you and I know that’s impossible nowadays. »

« It still should be my duty to not let things like these happen. » he looked to the side. « But does the assembly ever listen to me? Absolutely not. You have no idea how many times I’ve told them about how we could change this town for the better. I’ve been rejected at any given prompt. »

Were he an actual human at the moment, Roman would have probably seen the compassion flooding the man’s face.

« I really don’t get it. It’s that simple! » the prince opened his arms. « And then- and then something like this happens. » he pointed to the bat. « Because people have no other choice, thanks to us. »

« It isn’t a wrong choice, though. » a pair of perplexed eyes set on him. « I mean, to some extent, I’m still alive. And I think, with the right knowledge and time to adjust, it isn’t so bad after all. »

« Well … »

« No, I’m serious. You might need to change your life, but years after you know your routine. And I don’t have to worry about many other issues I was constantly anxious about before. »

A small smile crept on Roman’s lips at that. « You sure? »

« I’m fine, Ro. Really. »

The prince considered, staring at the marquis with his head tilted to the side. There had to be something else he could have done, apart from giving him back his body. Something that could have assured his safety, to say the least.

Roman wished to erase all of his concerns.

« I want you to find a place where you can stay until it doesn’t fascinate you anymore. » he gave voice to his musings. « Maybe … you could come with me when we’re done here? » he suggested, slowly brightening as ideas formed in his mind. The theatre production didn’t matter anymore, anyway.

« How so? »

« A prince always has his ways. There are infinite possibilities! Think about it, I know where everyone is all the time, I would know where to keep you. My parents don’t even remember the servants’ faces. »

« Oh, to be a humble servant in love with the prince. » the bat mocked.

« In love? » Roman repeated, amusement in his expression. And a very invisible and sudden twist of his heart.

« For sure. »

Jokes on them.

« Well then, my humble servant. » the prince got up and moved the cup of tea he definitely didn’t forget on the counter and walked towards the door of the room. « We have a big day ahead so I’m going to rest. You should try to get some sleep too since you won’t tomorrow. »

« How many times do I have to say bats aren’t strictly a nightly species? »

« One more, please. »

When their laughter was done, Roman lingered on the entrance.

« Thank you for opening up to me. And … please consider what I told you, okay? »

« I will. » the man answered warmly.

With that, they were both left to their sleepless night, daydreaming about possibilities they hoped could come real.

But the marquis had already made up his mind.

✾✾✾

His blood ran cold as he felt the tip of a sword being pointed to his back. Well, fucking shit.

« Hello there, is the shop open? » Remus knew exactly whose voice that was despite the fact that he had never heard it once in his entire life.

When he turned, he was met with none else but the prince’s figure standing tall behind him, while a tiny bat sat attentive on his shoulder. Of course.

Remus got up, his hood still covering the majority of his face.

« To what do I owe the pleasure? »

« No playing around. » Roman demanded, serious in his tone and eyes. He stared at Remus as he moved, sword raising with every movement. « Change my friend back this instant. »

Oh, marvelous. They were friends now, how could he have not taken that into account?

« Sorry, business is closed at the moment. » he retorted, spitting his words out. The sword flew to his chin in an instant.

« Are you sure about that? » venom, nothing but venom, more than the marquis had ever felt in his own body.

Remus sighed and eventually lowered his hood, revealing his identity once and for all. « You sure do know how to have fun, my dearest brother. »

And Roman almost dropped his weapon on the ground.

He had called him what now?

The prince went quickly over the facial features of the man in front of his eyes, it felt like looking at his own mirror, minus the facial hair and the white streak.

Or the dark circles around his eyes and the pale almost ill-looking skin.

Maybe it felt actually like looking at a mirror that showed an alternate life in which all he had found was misery. And he couldn’t help but be overwhelmed by a sense of pity.

« We’re- You- I’m sorry. I apologize. I’m … I’m confused. »

Remus arched an eyebrow. « Confused? What’s there to explain? »

« How in the world I have never known I had a twin brother, for instance. » Roman placed the bat on a stable surface next to him, afraid he would have made him fall as his entire body seemed to be trembling with an overflow of emotions.

What was happening?

« Never known? » the former duke opened his arms. « Hadn’t you refrained from acknowledging me this whole time? »

« What? » the prince’s mind was racing. « I’d never do that! I don’t even know your name! » tears welled up in his eyes from frustration. He had to keep it together, gosh why was it so difficult?

« Okay, okay. Hold on a second. »

« The bat talks? »

« I know. Mages. »

« Both of you, sit down. » the marquis demanded, seriousness fading as, sadly, his size didn’t help in making him believable enough.

The two brothers complied anyway.

« Now, you may take turns in speaking. »

« Yeah, what the hell happened? Mom and dad never gave you the evil twin speech? »

Roman shrugged in confusion. « I guess not. I promise to you, I was grown to believe to be an only child. They never told me about you … I guess that’s the reason why they never wanted me to come here alone in the first place. Have you always been here? »

« Since I can recall. » Remus nodded, his mind traveling as far back as it could. « This wasn’t a town at first. It was my dukedom. But our beloved parents destroyed it before I could even reach the age of ruling. I lived here with some servants, but they left as soon as they declared negated all the titles in this land. I was locked out of the manor and I tried to survive on my own from there. » the rage in his brother’s chest filled the gap in his childhood that could have been taken by his time with Remus.

« Every time you came here, I was locked inside my shop for days. As you can see, I got bored and studied whatever magical stuff was in there and this is where I ended up. » he pointed to the bat who was staring at them.

« This is insane! » Roman talked still in disbelief.

« You can say our parents may be two pieces of shit. »

« Doing this only to protect their image? » the prince seemed to be talking to himself, until he turned to his brother again. « I’m sorry on their behalf. I literally have no words to describe how awful I feel. » he rested his face in his hands and sighed deeply. What was there to say? It’s not like he could have done much else with no knowledge of his existence.

Then, an idea.

« We’re going to get your manor back. »

« Huh? »

« And the dukedom. I’ll make sure to restore your titles. Unless you don’t want to come back as a prince, as it should be your right. »

Remus considered the possibilities, he did want to get at least his early decent life back, but … the idea of his parents in front of his eyes and constantly around him didn’t sit right with him.

« I’ll … think about it? » his gaze stopped on the bat. « What about him? »

« Believe me, if you turn me back right now I can leave the entire town to your own needs. »

He chuckled. Ah, the sweet sound of desperation.

Remus focused just that itty bit he needed, before muttering a spell under his breath and sending a green flicker to hit the animal’s body.

And that was it.

As if nothing had ever happened, there the actual marquis stood, in flesh and bones, as alive as his condition permitted him to be, leaning against whatever he was previously standing on as a bat.

The scars were still splitting his blind eye and cheek in a half.

As the man checked his body for anomalies, Remus didn’t definitely miss how his brother held his breath involuntarily. He side glanced both of them, as the eyes of the two met holding the gaze for a few seconds.

Yeah. It seemed kind of obvious.

« This is all? »

He nodded.

Roman stood up in a rush, as if he had just remembered how to move his limbs, and launched himself at the now anthropomorphic figure of the marquis.

« Gosh, finally, we made it! »

Though, the other’s enthusiasm wasn’t exactly as strong.

« You can’t do anything for the scars? » he looked over to Remus, who didn’t even have the time to reply as Roman, well, he didn’t really think he was going to let him go down that way.

« I think he shouldn’t. » he offered the hint of a smile. « You look absolutely fine with them. »

« For the love of the greatest Sorcerer, if you need to get it on please stay away from my manor. »

Roman really really wished he still had the sword in his grip in that exact moment.

Gay panic ensued, together with very flustered people and a soon to be again duke leading the way back to the town centre. Before they could reach the manor, Remus stopped, his shop nearby.

« I’ll think about your offer. » he informed Roman. « In the meantime, I think I’ll have some packing to do. » he pointed to his left, revealing the door of his shop right next to him.

His brother nodded and saluted him with a movement of his hand and a subtle smile. When he turned, Remus grabbed the marquis’s shoulder.

« Listen, I see how you look at each other. »

The man arched an eyebrow. « And? »

« Just. Don’t do anything stupid. »

« Nothing you would do, then? »

« Precisely. »

The marquis laughed quietly. « I’ll do my best. »

Remus honestly didn’t know what to expect from that.

✾✾✾

« Hey. »

So close.

His hand lingered on the gates’ bars. He turned and was met with a figure standing beside him, arms crossed and a dull expression adorned by hurt eyes.

« Going for a walk? » Roman’s tone was everything he didn’t want to hear.

The man sighed. Doing this the hard and painful way hadn’t been his intention. Yet, he knew he had to break Remus’s promise as soon as he had made it.

« Roman- »

« You could have just told me. »

He took a minimal step back. « What? »

« That you weren’t even planning on staying. » Roman was looking him in the eyes and it felt like keeping your gaze close to the fire. « You didn’t need to lead me on until now only to leave me like this. »

« It’s not that. » he intruded, speaking softly.

« Say it. » the prince sounded exasperated. « Just say it already. At least I can convince myself it isn’t my fault. »

« It’s not. » was there someone at fault? The marquis pressed his fingertips on the inner corner of his eyes. He didn’t want to do this. He really didn’t want to. « I can’t stay. »

« Why? »

« Because I’m constantly running away! » his hands flew away from his face. « I can’t stay anywhere long enough because I’m just wrong in comparison to everyone else. I’m different and I have to escape before anyone could pick up on that. »

Roman still stared at him; they had gone through that already once, why was it so difficult for him to stay just because he was a vampire? Why couldn’t he come with him?

« This life sucks and I couldn’t ask you to endure it. You wouldn’t be able to. »

« Who says that? »

« I do! I’ve been doing this for years and even I can’t handle it. » his hand was clutched to his chest in a fist. He didn’t want to, « I kill everything around me. » but the tears had already started running even without his permission.

Roman stepped forward as his expression shifted slowly to sympathy. No. The man’s mind raced. No, no, no.

He took a step back. « I come here and I discover I have golden blood, » Roman stopped a few feet away. « I get to know I belong to the royal chaste of vampires, as if a regular one wasn’t bad as it is. » his breathing turned heavier. « And because of that, everything inside my body is poisonous. Others can track me down easily and we aren’t exactly the friendliest species. You’d be in danger. »

If the prince had come forward again, he hadn’t noticed.

« I am constantly running away and a constant risk to the ones around me. » Roman was raising his hand and he gently shoved it away, fearing the worst.

« This isn’t a fairytale, Roman. It’s a horror story and it ends badly either for the protagonist or the monster. Are you even listening? »

« Are you? » Roman’s hand hovered over his arm, waiting to move further. « You’re asking me not to follow you when I’m already attached to you by a chain? » he ducked his head to make the other look at him directly in his dark eyes.

« You want me to stay still when I’m inches away from being able to console you with a sole touch? » the prince could see the veiled freight in the man’s eyes as he raised his hand again, a moment away from his cheek wet by tears.

One.

An instant.

His fingers were already caressing his cheek as new tears soaked it while the poison stuck to his skin.

And it was over.

« You’re telling me- »

« Roman, what did you do? »

« You’re telling me, » both of Roman’s hands were on his cheeks, thumbs brushing away his crying. « That I wouldn’t be able to kiss you, when there isn’t a single thing in the world I want to do more? »

The man’s heart almost completely stopped in his chest, melting as Roman’s lips moved to form ulterior sweet words he didn’t feel he deserved. He had his back pressed on the gates the same way an overwhelming feeling weighed down his stomach.

He was dying. Roman was dying and there was only one thing to do.

Killing him even faster, but only just.

His lips were the weapon, his teeth were the bullets and the poison was the god of Death. As he kissed the prince, pulling him close, the thought of that blatant murder allowed contrasting feelings.

He saved him by signing his death certificate, he could have stopped and yet he didn’t.

What was desire? An abstract concept inherent in human race. As you satisfy a wish, a new one makes way into your mind.

There was no actual satisfaction, but a constant yearning for more than what you already own.

They knew, because their lips weren’t able to break apart if not for a few seconds, before diving in again into something they knew they couldn’t fill.

Yet, nature envied them. The flowers desired to stand tall, plants wanted to show their vivid colours, the rivers wished they could shine limpidly even under the moonbeam.

But they had to wait, left unfulfilled and in permanent disquiet until they got what they wanted.

The lovers, though. They were unstoppable and invincible for as long as their hands touched and their hearts were connected.

Finally, Roman smiled. His arms lowered on the marquis’ shoulders and he chuckled.

« It appears I am bound to you, now. »

« You’re the stupidest person I’ve met. » the man gripped at his clothes and pulled him in for another quick kiss. « You’re stupid. I can’t believe you’re such an idiot and a prince at the same time. »

« I’m thinking about retiring. »

« Oh my stars, he’s gone. »

« Think about it! I could send Remus rule in my place, let our parents deal with what they’ve left behind. » Roman heard him snort with laughter. « What? It’s a perfect plan. »

« Yeah, right. » the man searched his eyes. « What about you? »

« We can run away together. You won’t be alone to fight off the ones that want to take you down. »

« This isn’t going to be easy. You’ll turn any moment now and you’ll need time to adjust to your new condition. » Roman nodded at that. « We’ll have to stay out of sight for a while, can you do that? »

« I can. » Roman’s determination made him want to take on the world with his bare hands.

Then, something in Roman’s eyes shifted. « Also, am I going to pass out or are you actually extremely stunning right now? » the prince’s eyebrows narrowed, his vision blurry.

That was the red code.

« Let’s get you in before everybody sees you. »

« I love you. » the marquis almost tripped over himself. That man needed to stop.

« I do too, but please refrain from speaking until later. »

✾✾✾

« Please, take care, okay? Visit as soon as you can. » Patton hugged the two one last time, nostalgia already washing over him. Logan had just given his own goodbyes and was keeping a very unhappy Virgil still.

One week had passed since Roman’s turning, they had decided to leave as he looked stable enough.

« Are you sure you don’t want me to, I don’t know, hex the whole town or something so you can stay longer? » Remus offered as his brother stifled a laugh. That was low-key endearing. Odd, as not much time earlier he had despised him under false accusations.

They shared a hug, too. « We’re going to be fine. » Roman promised and handed him the princely stuff he wasn’t going to need anymore. « And as you would say … » his expression contorted deep in thought. « Fuck ‘em up? »

« What did you say? » Virgil interrupted, while his parents collectively sent death glares at Roman.

« Duck the cup. » the marquis offered, eyeing the brothers with a sharp look. « As a metaphorical good luck wish, I suppose. »

« Like when they crash bottles against ships? »

« Definitely. »

When their last conversation came to an end, the prince and the marquis started walking away.

Roman looked back to them, his pace slowing down. He locked eyes with Virgil.

« Now! »

Virgil broke free of his dad’s grip and sprinted forward to them, laughing like he had just told the funniest joke in existence. Roman scooped him up in his arms and started running while his lover stared at him in utter disbelief.

« Roman, what the hell! » Logan ran after him, causing the laughter to spread between all those present.

« You absolute mad man! »

It took twenty minutes for the real departure to happen. But at least, they were all smiling.

And, maybe, teary-eyed too. But they were not going to mention it until later some months, or even years, where they could all finally meet again and catch up with their incredible lives.

Until then, they would keep smiling.

✾✾✾

They had been traveling the whole day, the sun shone from behind the mountains in the distance, almost completely hidden, so that the light coloured in rosy tones.

It did feel like a fairy tale, in the long run.

Roman was already smiling to himself when a small giggle escaped his lips.

« What’s so funny? » his lover turned enough to both look at him and be aware of their path.

« You never told me your name. » the prince was looking ahead, quite amused.

« Were I to tell you, you’d never be able to fly among the constellations like you’ve always dreamt. » he remembered one of the many stories he had told him while still a bat.

« I believe I can risk that. »

« I wouldn’t want to bear the guilt of taking that away from you. » they stopped in their tracks and faced each other. « But there might be a way I can help with. »

With no warning, the marquis leaned in and pecked Roman’s lips, softly, so that he could have sensed that small spark in his chest before it transformed into a thunderous firework.

« Is that how you reach the stars? »

The man only smirked at Roman, going back to lead the way through the yellow field. Their road towards a new life was starting to clear.

And their kingdom shone for evermore.

#halloween project #roceit #logicality #roman sanders #deceit sanders #remus sanders #logan sanders #patton sanders #virgil sanders #sanders sides #ts fanfic #sanders sides fic #roceit fic #fanfiction #read the warnings #vampires #purp's writings

130 notes · View notes

revengerevisited · 4 years

Text

I wanna do something a little fun and just share some of the KH fanfic ideas I’ve had for a while, which are mostly about Vanitas because of course they are. XD But yeah, here are my ideas:

1. A Shadow of Two - a sequel to A Heart and a Half, kinda a fix-it for KH3 but not really since it’s an AU to begin with. Vanitas Aqua and Ventus would be the main trio, but Sora Riku and Kairi are also POV characters, with each of them having their own trio and goals: Sora (with Donald and Goofy) looking for a way to revive Roxas while struggling with his own inner darkness, Kairi training with Axel and getting help from Ienzo in discovering her past, Riku Mickey and an unrevealed character on a secret Realm of Darkness mission and also finding a way to revive Naminé, and Vanitas Aqua and Ventus searching for the new Princesses of Heart while dealing with their own problems: Vanitas still dealing with his trauma while adjusting to normal society, Aqua dealing with something I can’t reveal yet, and Ventus... honestly I don’t know what to do with Ventus. The most obvious answer would be recovering his lost memories, but... well, introducing an egregiously convoluted backstory wherein Ventus and/or Vanitas might be a murderer isn’t exactly appealing to me, to say the least. I really wish Ven’s backstory could’ve been something I was allowed to make up myself. Other than that, the story would generally follow KH3 but with way more Disney worlds and hopefully fewer plot holes. ;P

2. Broken Hearts (Take Time to Mend) - a post-KH3 fic that ignores Re:Mind and the time-traveling Vanitas retcon. This fic is about the REAL Vanitas who was in KH3 and resurrected via scream energy who has returned once again, this time in the Land of Departure but is too weak to leave and is quickly discovered by the Wayfinder Trio. Tensions are high but he’s ultimately allowed to stay, with the focus of the story being on the four of them helping each other recover from their respective traumas: Vanitas’s years of abuse by Xehanort, Terra’s decade of possession by Xehanort (which according to the post-Re:Mind character files was a lot more traumatic than I’d realized), Aqua’s decade spent in the Realm of Darkness and subsequent corruption by darkness, and Ven’s... almost being killed by Eraqus, I guess. While pretty bad, that’s probably not as traumatizing as years of torture and torment, and the more obvious trauma to use would be Ventus committing/witnessing Strelitzia’s murder, but as I’ve established I just really don’t want to deal with KHUX at all. Anyway, this could work as a gen fic but since I love Vanqua so much I might as well make it one, maybe throw a little Terrella in there too 'cause why not.

3. This fic idea focuses on the aftermath of KH3, NOT Re:Mind, where Riku Kairi and Naminé are trying to adjust back to a normal life at Destiny Islands while also dealing with their grief over Sora’s disappearance. Kairi deals with blaming herself for Sora’s ‘death’, Naminé deals with being adopted as Kairi’s sister and learning how to be a normal person, and Riku deals with his growing feelings for Naminé, but the real star of the show is... Sora’s mom! Oh and Vanitas too, of course. Sora’s mom (who really needs a name) has finally been told about everything that’s happened these past two-ish years, and a month after Sora’s disappearance she finds a comatose Vanitas washed up on the beach. She assumes it’s Sora, although Riku and Kairi are quick to correct her. Despite their warnings, Sora’s mom nurses Vanitas back to health and basically adopts him, although he isn’t exactly happy with the situation. Still weak and recovering, Vanitas is unable to leave, and Sora’s mom won’t stop in her efforts to help him adjust to a normal life. This one could be merged into Broken Hearts, since I could imagine Riku informing the Wayfinder Trio about Vanitas’s return and an angry and distrustful post-KH3 Aqua wouldn’t want to let him out of her sight, but it might be better to keep them as separate fics seeing as they’re set in two different locations.

4. My next idea hinges on my theory of what the next KH game could’ve been like... or at least before Re:Mind pretty much shot it down. My theory was that Vanitas, the real Vanitas not the time-traveler, was still inside Sora’s heart and therefore went along with him to TWEWY. I haven’t played TWEWY but I know that Sora would need a partner to defeat the Noise, and what better partner than a former enemy? This would be similar to A Heart and a Half but instead of romance it’s a sibling team-up with them trying to escape Shibuya. This fic could also be combined with the previous idea as well... Maybe Sora allows Vanitas to win the Reaper’s Game and he ends up on Destiny Islands unable to remember what happened in TWEWY. Vanitas would be the key to getting Sora back but only if Naminé can unlock his lost memories. My only problem is that I would have to erase all that character development Vanitas gained with Sora to reset him back to have character development with the Destiny Islands characters instead, at least until he regains all his memories.

5. A different Vanitas and Sora team-up fic. Once again this is the real Vanitas who used scream energy to revive himself, but that made his heart rather unstable. He tries to fight Sora Donald and Goofy in Monstropolis but is too weak and sick and loses. Upon discovering that Vanitas looks just like him, Sora decides to take him back to Yen Sid for healing and answers. But Vanitas’s negativity is too much for the Gummiship to handle and it ends up stalling. Sora Donald and Goofy slowly nurse a very reluctant Vanitas back to health with the power of friendship, which would reduce the amount of negativity so the Gummiship can fly again. Vanitas and the trio travel to a few different Disney worlds and eventually rescue Aqua and Ven. I don’t know what would happen after that though, since I don’t want to just rehash exactly what happened in the Keyblade Graveyard.

6. A pre-BBS Vanqua AU. Only a few months after being created, Vanitas runs away from Xehanort to the Land of Departure, hoping to merge with Ven early. Unfortunately for him Ven is still in a coma, so Vanitas tries to merge with Aqua instead. This doesn’t quite work, but does end up linking their hearts in such a way that neither can go too far away from each other without feeling sick or even dying. Now stuck at the Land of departure, Vanitas is found by Xehanort who is enraged that Vanitas has basically ruined all his plans. Fearing for his life, Vanitas convinces Xehanort that the plan can still be salvaged: Vanitas will become Eraqus’s apprentice under the guise of Ven’s ‘brother’ and is tasked with encouraging Terra’s darkness while making sure Ventus and/or Aqua are trained to their fullest, depending on which one would be better to merge with. Xehanort, not wanting to start this entire endeavor over, agrees to the plan and introduces Vanitas to Eraqus and the others. Since Vanitas is now wearing normal clothing, Aqua has no idea that he is the masked boy who attacked her earlier, but feels strangely drawn to him due to their connected hearts. The rest of the fic would basically be about the four apprentices’ life at the Land of Departure, with Vanitas struggling with his loyalty to Xehanort vs his slowly burgeoning friendship with Terra Ven and Aqua, all while trying not to blow his cover with the Unversed.

I also have a few smaller ideas that I haven’t really thought through yet or might work better as oneshots or fanart: 1. A Lion King Vanqua AU with lion Aqua and black leopard Vanitas, Terra Eraqus and Xehanort also as lions, Ven as a regular leopard, and Braig as a hyena. 2. A KH1 retelling/reimagining with Vanitas reincarnated as Sora’s younger brother. 3. A Nier Automata AU with resistance android Terra, scanner Ventus, attacker Aqua, and Vanitas as a scanner with executioner chips installed by Xehanort sent to infiltrate Yorha. 4. A post-KH3 fic dealing with Sora’s restlessness after attempting to return to a normal life on Destiny Islands, feeling like he doesn’t belong after everything he’s been through. 5. Something about Aqua taking care of Ven when he first arrives at the Land of Departure, possibly Venqua. 6. A Vanqua-ish KH3 fic with Vanitas kidnapping Aqua to be used as a Guardian or Seeker back-up for Org13, but he eventually befriends her and lets her go. 7. And finally, a Namiku fic set between CoM and KH2. I kinda feel like this should be part of the A Heart and a Half ‘canon’, but I’m not actually sure whether it should be its own fic or just flashback scenes in A Shadow of Two.

You’ll notice that I really love stories about villain redemption, abuse/mental illness recovery, and former enemies becoming friends/lovers, which is why I’ve grown so disappointed with mainstream works nowadays rarely exploring those topics (at least not that I’ve seen). I guess that’s where that old saying comes in, “if you want something done right, you have to do it yourself”. But yeah, that’s just a quick list of my KH fic ideas so far!

11 notes · View notes

vixenfur · 6 years

Note

Tag at least 5 people you love and give a few words on why!

OH MY GOODNESS!!!

Since there was so much BS in the fandom today, time to share some love! :)

- @zeta-jane is an absolute godsend of a friend. They are sassy, funny, talkative, energetic and so full of amazing ideas!!! Zeta is always there for me when I need someone to lean on. They’re such a kind friend and they will not hesitate, baitch to fight people who hurt me- probably because they know I’d do the same for them! They’re such good company both online and IRL, and I am blessed to have met them! I am even more blessed to be writing City of Dust and Shadows with them, which has become the longest fic either of us has ever written! We may or may not surpass it with our future collabs, however ;) They are just the coolest person ever and they deserve all the love in the world. I adore them so much!!! TUT

- @mikayu-chan is such a got damn SWEETHEART. They are trying to see the positive side of things, especially after so much fandom drama in the past, and I’m so so proud of them for trying their hardest to live their best life. They have it way too hard and I want to give them a big ole hug and many days of fun!!! They always make me laugh and we have a great time on calls! I’m glad that we see eye-to-eye on so many things and that we continue to teach each other new things all the time!! They are really an irreplaceable friend and such a joy to talk with, to write with, and to laugh with. I love you Chan

- @crazyloststar deserves the entire world and more!!!! oMg I cannot express how much I love Alex!!!!! Alex is just a big bundle of happiness and fun and she makes me so so so so so so so happy. I love calling with her and talking, I love writing with her and everything else!! We always have so much fun, I swear I can’t talk to her without laughing my ass off at least once XD we’re always DJDJDHDHDHDJD’ing at each other because we just can’t find the right words to express how hard we’re agreeing with each other/laughing omfg. I adore her and I cant WAIT to cosplay KimiYoi and RyuuTenn with her hopefully at next year’s Yaoi Con WOOT WOOT :D!!!!

- @yuudefensesquad is sUCH A GOOD BEAN who deals with SO MUCH and she just needs a big ole hug and lots of Yuuchan i stg. Caydence is such a funny funky lil nugget and I protecc her with my life okay. Her art? Flawless. Her shitposts? FUCKIN HILARIOUS. Her meta? Super engaging and intriguing! Her bravery? ABOVE US ALL LOL. She is just awesome and I’m glad I forcefully adopted her into my lil family of mikayuu nerds bc it just wouldn’t be the same without her. Caydence ily never stop being you. A lot of shit challenges her irl and everywhere else, but she still keeps her head up and man I really respect her.

- @mikaisatop is MY FRICKIN RIGHT HAND MAN. My SOULMATE. SARAHHH I ADORE YOU. You might be busy rn but I love you so much girl ;__; even though she’s busy I always bother her bc I want her to know I wouldn’t ever forget about her!! I’m so happy we got to collab so much and will continue doing so!! Winter’s Waltz is so much fun to write and I’m so happy she is writing it with me anyways despite such a busy schedule. If it weren’t for Sarah we wouldn’t have so much good MikaYuu content and I applaud her for it!!

- @6lilystrings9 IS JUST THE BOMB DOT FUCKIN COM. Lily and I didn’t super duper connect until more recently but omg talking with her is just a freakin BLAST. We always get so hype with each other, even over each other’s fandoms that we aren’t even in!!! Something about the energy in her pulls out the energy in me and we just get GOING lmao. She is so very talented and amazing and a fascinating person all around! I’m so glad we got to hang a bit at KatsuCon in 2017 but I hope we can do that again in the future! I miss her all the time!

- @weirdfairytales is the MAN. THE MYTH. THE LEGEND. Anna is just the biggest definition of a meme I can think of and I LOVE her for it. I’m so glad that we met way back when MikaYuuHell Skype existed and that she thought of the masterpiece that is Cherry Boy one wild night. I’m so glad we continued to be great friends and talk about so many things. I love when our messages get super long cause we just have so many things to say XD Cosplaying Victuuri with her at Katsu was so lit, and I can’t express how much I love her Victuuri fic too!!!

- @hannaadi88 is such. a. sweetheart. I can’t say it enough. Hanna does so much and gets so little I stfg yall need to APPRECIATE HER MORE. Her writing is STUNNING and the projects she makes for this fandom are just outstanding!!! From gift exchanges (I SAID ONS REMIX BEFORE IM SORRY i was wrong XD) to 365 Days of Mika and Yuu, she has put in so much for us constantly! She has also granted us with the lovely fic Scented, and not to mention one of my favorite fics of ALL TIME, Eye of Horus- the Ancient Egypt take on Unwritten!!! And she named it that without knowing my first tattoo is literally the eye of horus! XD I was shook lmfao and I still am. Meeting Hanna was amazing and the day I spent with her and @ihavetobenkyou (who is also a-freaking-MAZING and a big bundle of goodness!!!!!!) is one I’ll never forget. She’s so chill and just gives off this ‘wise’ aura idk why but I just look up to Hanna so much. No matter what she writes I will always support her and you all should too!!!

- @just-another-dream-about-yuu is ONE OF MY FAVORITE HUMANS TO EVER HUMAN. Julia omfg I cannot express how much I love you. TwT Julia is not only one of the most talented artists I have ever seen, but she is so sweet and fun and so full of energy and excitement!! She’s super busy with adulting so she’s not around in the fandom a whole lot but I always make sure to include her bc I won’t let her leave XD JULIA YOU CANNOT ESCAPE…. lmfao I will always drag you back… I won’t ever forget the day I got a twitter notification that someone drew me Unwritten fanart and the croaking sound I made was insane LMAO my friend who was with me was like WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED XD I was so excited!!! I still adore every piece of fanart she’s given me and I always will. Thank you, Julia, for bringing my imagination to life so many times, for showing me what you saw when you read my writing. It means more than I can say.

- @coleglend is the most underappreciated person in this fandom I swear. Or, who was in this fandom- Cole is off doing other things besides OnS, but regardless, she is so very amazing and beyond talented. I can’t even express how beautiful her art is and the emotions each piece sparks in me. Even her new Marvel artworks are just breathtaking and I truly admire them!!! I don’t know anyone who can make such detailed, visually engaging art- everything she creates belongs in a museum I swear. I want to print them and frame them for my walls!!! I look at her art all the time!!! Now that I’ve established how gorgeous her art is, talk about Cole as a person! She’s so sweet and kind and I love seeing her little posts on Instagram and such, even though I can’t understand most of them, I like seeing that she’s with friends and having a good time.

- @linnpuzzle is one of the coolest most amazing people in this fandom!!! Her art is STUNNING and as she knows, I will drop everything to commission her and buy her merch because I just am addicted to her gorgeous art!!! I am so honored to have some of her art as part of my collection of OnS things and I am forever going to treasure the commissions I’ve purchased from her!! Besides being a great artist, I love talking with Linn, too! I’m so glad we have things in common outside of MikaYuu, like Voltron and Kyo Kara Maoh :D Linn is truly too good for this world and she deserves everything okokok.

- @zilleniose-chu is truly an ICON of this fandom. We don’t talk alot outside of business stuff lolol but they are just freakin amazing!!! I adore their art so much- I always have, ever since I first saw their page!!- and I LOVE their AU’s and headcanons!! They are full of such great ideas and humor and they can share those ideas through really stunning and captivating artwork

- @absolute-exclusivity IS AN AMAZIN. ABSOLUTELY AMAZING BEAN OH MY GOODNESS i cANT TELL YOU ENOUGH HOW MUCH I LOVE LYSIA. AAAAAAAAHHHH THIS GIRL IS GONNA SPEND MY BIRTHDAY WITH ME OUT IN LONDON LESSGO GIRL!!! I’m so excited you have NO IDEA. Lysia is so so so energetic and cute and overall such an amazing friend!! She’s so caring and always willing to listen even when things are busy for her!! She’s full of hilarious, tragic, and heart-pounding ideas and AU’s. We always get lit together talking about fics and headcanons and I wouldn’t trade those moments for the world. I can’t wait to meet her and I can’t wait to collab with her and Zeta soon, too!!

- @rindartist is absolutely one of my favorite artists of ALL TIME no doubt about it. Rin is so amazing, always making so many beautiful artworks of MikaYuu, and now of other lovely series aswelll! I may not be into GBF but her art of it is just lovely and I suggest everyone to commission Rin if they have the means!!

- @p0isonpez is someone I’ve only seen from afar but I absolutely love her art and posts!! I am so happy to see someone new in the fandom sharing such lovely things and interacting with the rest of us!! you seem so friendly and kind and I hope we can talk more sometime! :D

- @temesasu is such a sweetheart!! We’re just starting to talk a little more, but I am soso happy!! They are such an amazing cosplayer and their ONS cosplayers bring such a big smile to my face. They are beautiful and able to make themselves look like so many different characters!!! They are so talented with makeup, I am in awe!! :D And they are so kind and fun to talk to, and I hope we talk more! Thank you for sharing your cosplays with us, you are amazing! Don’t stop!

- @seraph-star is such a good precious person who makes endless good content!! Omg, their edits are just so awesome!! they always have me bouncing my head along, or completely enraptured and breathless, or laughing!! They are so good at evoking different emotions through video editing and as a very casual video editor myself, I am so impressed with their work!! I also love their memes and art and everything else that they share!!!

- @angeru-artist is a precious PRECIOUS ANGEL who deserves the entire world!!!! Omg, Angeru makes such amazing art, with such expressive characters and cute little attributes!!! I love it when I see their art and I’m so glad that we share a few fandoms together rather than just one. Angeru is really bighearted and she goes through way too much hard times, and I wish I could just take her away to somewhere better!!! One day my friend we will forget about the world and just have fun!!

- @maqui-chan iS ONE OF THE BEST ARTISTS I’VE EVER KNOWN OMFG. her art is iconic and unforgettable!!!! Maqui’s art has always been one of my favorites of all time and I can’t even count the amount of times I’ve commissioned her LOL!! I JUST LOVE HER ART SO MUCH OKAY!?? ITS SO GOOD GO LOOK AT ALL OF HER GLORIOUS CREATIONS! she is so talented and she can create anything, from angst to smut to humor, leave it to Maqui to create amazing things!! And omg Maqui ignited the fire in all of our ShuuNaru hearts amiright!??? GOD her art inspired me so much to the point to where I wrote a ShuuNaru fic and it was so much fun!!! Maqui, thank you for drawing so many awesome things and creating so much for the fandom!! Even if you’ve mostly fallen out of it, your creations are always going to be treasured by me and many other people- you’ve impacted people way more than you know! Thank you for always making me laugh on twitter aswell XD you’re amazing and ily!!!

OK OK I;M OUT OF STEAM I’VE BEEN TYPING THIS FOREVER OK i could go ON AND ON about even MORE people in this fandom but that would take me literal ages LMAO

TO EVERYONE ELSE, WHO I DIDN’T MENTION BC MY BRAIN IS JUMBLED AND I AM EXHAUSTED: I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. DONT STOP CREATING. THE FANDOM IS A FLAMING GARBAGE HEAP SOMETIMES LIKE IT WAS TODAY. But DON’T LET THAT STOP YOU from having a good time, doing what you love, and creating things that you are proud to share!!! And if your heart leads you elsewhere, to a different brand new fandom, I hope you always remember the people you inspired with your work!! I hope you forget the bad memories and always treasure the good ones. I hope that we can be friends and/or that I can continue supporting you no matter where we all end up in the years to come. And if you decide to support me too, I give you my biggest, most heartfelt thanks.

No matter how ridiculous this fandom can get and how much stupid discourse can dampen the mood and disappoint me, I will never let it stop me from loving MikaYuu and OnS and what I do. I will never let it stop me from writing all that my crazy little heart wants. I will continue to write until my passion dies, and when that day comes I will probably cry as I say goodbye and resort to watching from the sidelines as everyone else carries on. I will never forget the fun I had here. These past 3 years have been so impactful already, and I know the future ones will continue to be- with the old friends, with the new friends, and with friends to be made!!

Let’s spread love more often rather than hate. I encourage anyone who feels inclined to make posts (maybe not as long as mine if you dont want XDD) talking about your favorite creators and friends in the fandom, too! Or, if that seems too corny to you, just continue to draw, write, edit, and cosplay! Continue to make people laugh and smile and cry and swoon! Continue to support creators by leaving comments and kudos, by liking and reblogging, by following and commissioning, and sharing and crediting their work wherever you can! Continue to make a difference!

I love you all so much!

#mikayuu #long post #personal #anon #spreading love w people i love

35 notes · View notes

kisathemistress · 3 years

Text

Alright, I haven't been as active as I wanted to be lately do to working 40 hours a week and depression kicking me in the ass (plus I have other life stuff happening...) anyway, I got accepted into college recently so I can get out of the minimum wage gigs.

Which means (especially if my current work sponsors me) I can take out a loan to upgrade all of my equipment, including buying a proper drawing tablet, under the disguise that it's for school only since banks are so hesitant even when my credit score is better than the regular people they get asking for loans.

Whatever, below will be what my plans are once I reopen my Patreon and start possibly live streaming again.

Game Development:

Original characters will be added from other projects to make up the "enemy" battlers in my RPG maker project.

If I somehow reach my milestone goals through my Patreon, I will consider hiring/creating a studio team willing to convert the game into a different engine and make it a 3D game.

If none of my potential revenue services generate enough for me to focus at least 50% of my time on game development, I will convert the entire game into a light novel series.

Fanfiction and Fan Manga:

With a proper set up I will be able to create more elaborate projects, such as a Fan Manga. I already write lots of fanfiction, most I don't post or get so busy/distracted I loose interest in completing what I have posted. I loose that "spark" of inspiration, basically.

Projects I want to work on currently are:

A Ben 10 fan manga. It will start from the beginning of the original series and end probably after a time skip and Ben is entering his 20's. (My next post will have, some of my ideas for this manga.). Like how 5yl is, the entire project will be behind a Patreon paywall, however I will release the first few chapters for free and have the subscription for it at less than $3 CND a month.

Commissions for custom fanfiction and fanart will be opened as individual (not subscription based) teirs on the Patreon. These will be done separately from other projects and if delays are happening, I will message you on why. (Likely writers block or a serious life event).

Drawing streams will be done hopefully every other Wednesday after 5pm central time. The theme of the stream will be on whatever platform I stream on. (Potentially could become gaming streams too).

Conclusion:

Once I get back "on the saddle" I will become more active with my own content again. Currently I need to focus most of my energy on my current job until at least the start of my second year of school. If they haven't bought me (are sponsoring me through school) I could potentially move on to a part-time job that pays twice as much and free myself to start on the forementioned projects sooner.

#kisa talks

0 notes

kazaikos · 7 years

Text

Dear Followers, all 3,895 of you.

I'm just going to come right out and say it, I'm closing up shop for this blog again. I know this would be the second time I've said I'm going on a permanent hiatus, but last time it was for different a reason, this time I'm not likely to pick it up again in the future. Here's the thing,

I've been absent for about a month and a half, this is partly because I'm on vacation, which is why I said posting was going to be spotty for awhile but it's also because I've been doing some thinking. Truth is, I'm losing interest in being active in the fandom. It's not that I've lost interest in Star Wars, or my favorite fictional couple of all time, it's not that at all. But, I'm finding it's a chore for me to upkeep the blog by looking for content in the very active community Star Wars has.

When I started, around the end of 2012 it seemed to me that the characters of Anakin and Padme had fans, and loyal ones at that, but they were scattered around the net. My only goal, was to round up all the art I could possibly find for them and showcase it in a way that would show how much love people had for this couple, and the Star Wars prequels in general. I also hoped that when people saw a bunch of fanart for them, they would be inspired to do their own, or be reminded of the prequels again if they had forgotten how much they used to love it.

After a year or so of blogging, like a train engine slowly picking up speed, I witnessed fandom growth, on tumblr and other social media platforms, for GL's last three SW films and the recent Star Wars: The Clone Wars animated show. Year after year, more activity then the last. This now huge community, became a haven for fans and so many of them happened to be artists. It was a real surprise and delight that appreciation was merging with art. Fan videos, fan-fiction, fanart and just a plethora of things in general were getting uploaded everyday. Content you could find through tag searching was easily buried by new posts pouring in. I can't say for sure if I helped at all, but numerous blogs sprung up and it was like the voices of those who loved George's stories, embolden by other around them, decided to shout out their love too. Fans becoming no longer concerned of what geek media said or thought and others just tired of the constant irrational hatred against the movies.

But now that prequel appreciation has reached new heights of activity, the still-recent acquisition of Star Wars by the Disney Corp. is changing the atmosphere, at least in my view. New and different fans are jumping on board because they love what Disney will do with the property. Some fans who love all six films are positive about the future as well. But, personally, I feel the train stops for me here. New episodes or comics etc. may come out for my/our beloved couple, but the era of time I was in love with is kinda over. George is no longer at the forefront of his creation, or even credited by Disney going forward. Unfortunately, Dave Filoni doesn't have a huge role to play either. I have not watched Rebels, I've heard mixed reviews, but honestly, my radar is on Anidala. As expected, their roles are near invisible since one character is dead and the other will always be represented as Darth Vader if Disney shies away from telling prequel-era stories. I guess, truthfully I'm just not interested in what Disney makes if George is gone.

Now, I have stuck around for awhile, even after the cancellation of SW:TCW because the potential ending of our last source for new content didn't/doesn't deter me from fangirling over the pair. I could run this blog for as a long as I wanted, I've hoarded so much material. And even if nothing new canonically ever came out again, I would make or find more things to post, if my heart were still in it. Star Wars becoming disneyfied is not something I'm crazy about but this restless feeling I have is actually more about feeling like what I started out to do, has been accomplished.

There is so much love for Ani and Pad's now, so much for the prequels, and all this acclamation from brand new fans who came in after watching the animated shows. Maybe this growth sensation is a mistaken feeling, depending on you you ask and it's only an amplification because it's just easier these days for every fan to be active voices through easy-to-use social media. Regardless, the fan-base definitely feels alive and well. And now, It just no longer feels necessary to prove that A/P are well appreciated. Others have also set out to do the same and I'm so thankful for that. My personality is such that I want to begin new things in areas that seem empty or in need of repair, but when a task is complete, it's on to the next for me. For these reasons, I realize it's time for me to move on. It's also not fair to run a blog dedicated to what I love, with half-hearted enthusiasm.

So, it will be like before. kazaikos.tumblr will remain an archive, not deleted but not updated and my last update will be tomorrow. Heh, I never did get around to posting everything I collected, in fact I do have so much more, but for the past year or so, what I've been finding has been coming from tumblr anyways; or other platforms like instagram, facebook and twitter. Before, it was like scouring the net using word and picture searches and finding near-lost art on dead sites. I wanted to save and archive all of it before it was completely lost. Thankfully, with the trend of social media, it's easier for art to get an audience and remain afloat.

And as to this blog itself, there's maintenance I would have wished I completed before leaving, such as tighter tag organization but it's energy I don't have. Hopefully, all my posts are searchable. :P

Please don't feel the need to say goodbye again, if you already did so back in 2014, I don't mean to appear wishy-washy, coming back again that time was unexpected but I realized I had a bit more I wanted to do, this time it's final and hope to gracefully close the curtains. Much, much love to all those who followed and enjoyed the posts. I've enjoyed running the blog so much and salute the effort put in by the fans to keep the Anidala fandom vibrant.

You can still message me to this blog if you want, because I will still check my messages. I’m not gone as a fan, just as a blogger for this subject.

#anidala #Anakin Skywalker #Padme Amidala #ANAKIN X PADME #anakin and padme #star wars: the clone wars #text post

56 notes · View notes

super-magical-wizard · 7 years

Text

Poor Anti

I wanted to write my own version of this amazing post by @monochromemedic !!! And my amazing and wonderful and lovely friend @fandom-jumper01 wrote their own really fricken amazing version which you can find right here!!

Warnings: cut, bleeding, blood, knife, injury, wound, suicide implied, self harm implied, violence mentioned, lots of crying, lots of angst, self blame (please let me know if you need anything else tagged ^-^)

Hope you like it!!

“I- I’m here,” Anti whispered, a shaky and nervous smile on his face as he looked at the camera. “Jack’s gonna be gone for a while.”

It had taken him so long to get this far. Before this all he had managed to do to Jack was glitch him a little and make him hear static, but now- now Anti was really here. He tried to keep a smile on his face as he held the bloody knife in his hand and tried his best to tell the audience what had happened.

“He was weak,” he mumbled, the smile slipping for a second before he bit his lip and attempted to look happy for camera again, but he just couldn’t. His hands glitched a bit from his uneasiness and he winced. “Say goodbye to him for a while, okay?”

And with that he turned off the camera.

He sat there for a while, just looking at his hands, at his hands. He had been locked away for so long and as drops of blood dripped from his neck onto his hands he sighed, finally letting himself relax for the first time in this body, the ever present static in his ears quiet for the first time in years. He had been struggling so much and now- now he was here. And as he looked at his hands his vision got blurry and he tried in vain to blink away tears but he just couldn’t manage it and he started to cry, softly and quietly.

“I- I did it-” he mumbled, so relieved to be free to be real. He slipped out of the chair and onto the ground and just hugged his knees to his chest as he cried and cried. “I did it.”

After a couple hours he finally managed to rub away the tears and he got up with shaky legs and started getting the video ready for posting. He had watched Jack do it so many times and it was a little difficult, but after a while it was finished and he posted it.

For a minute he waited with held breath and anxious thoughts and he glitched a little and he hoped, he hoped so much that maybe, just maybe, they would like him? With a trembling hand he refreshed the video for the first time and started looking through the comments.

“No…” he whimpered, tears coming to his eyes as he read them. “No..”

There were so many and they were all yelling at him, screaming at him to ‘go away’, to ‘give Jack back’, to ‘leave him alone’.

“But- but-” he whispered, throat hurting as he tried not to cry, static getting louder in his ears as his body glitched more and more. “I- I just wanted to be real-”

He clutched his hands to his chest, biting his lip until it bled before he just couldn’t take it anymore and he started to wail, eyes clenched shut as he glitched and glitched and he sobbed with all the pain in his heart because it hurt it hurt it hurt-

“They hate me- they hate me-” he whimpered, breathing in gasps as warm tears trickled down his cheeks. “It’s all my fault I shouldn’t- I shouldn’t have- “

He broke off and curled into a ball and cried, trying to hold himself together as he glitched with sadness and hurt and it hurt so much and he felt so hated as he cried alone and still blood trickled from the cut on his neck.

“Wait-” he whispered suddenly, sobs stopping as he looked up with teary eyes. “What if- what if I-”

He scrambled up from his place on the floor and staggered to the bathroom, not caring how he looked as he started desperately searching for something, biting his lip in frustration as his hands glitched away from the drawers.

“I can- I can fix this,” he whispered, tears and pain forgotten as he looked at himself in the mirror, eyes pure black for a second before he focused and managed to turn them back to how they were before. Then he finally found what he was looking for and pulled out the medicine, bandages, a needle, and thread and he looked at the cut nervously for a second before he took a shaky breath and started to thread the needle. “Maybe- maybe if I'm Jack- maybe they’ll like me.”

It took him a few hours, a few hours of concentrating, healing, and practicing, before he finally got up the courage to turn the camera back on. He sat in front of it, neck completely healed, still a little red but hopefully unnoticeable, and he held his left arm in his right hand, nails digging in a little to try to distract his body from glitching and to focus on smiling and acting 'normal'.

“Anti didn’t ‘kill’ me,” Anti smiled shakily, trying his best to act like it was just a joke, like everything was happy and fine. "It was just something fun I wanted to try out, nothing more than that.”

He kept talking, even as it got harder and harder to smile, he just dug his nails in and ignored the glitching and kept on smiling. He talked about how it was fun and he was glad everyone had enjoyed the little ‘appearance’ and he thanked everyone, even though his hands glitched and static filled his ears as he tried desperately not to cry again at the thought of how much they hated him.

After a couple more minutes the video was finally over and he turned off the camera, arms trembling from exhaustion. He had used up all his energy speeding up the healing, keeping the smile on his face, and stopping the glitches as much as he could.

“I- I did okay,” Anti whispered, a small hopeful smile on his face as he slumped in his chair and, without even noticing it, fell asleep.

“And I’ll see all of you, in the next video!” Anti yelled happily, a genuine grin on his face as he did the outro that had become so familiar to him.

He had been ‘pretending’ for months now, trying so hard to act like Jack, to erase who ‘Anti’ was. And it was working. At least he thought so.

He was trying. He was trying so hard to be the person that they loved and appreciated and he was happy… for the first time in his life he felt happy and he just wanted to make sure everyone else was happy too. That’s why he kept being ‘Jack’, so he didn’t take who Jack was from the community that cared about him so much. He interacted as much as he could online, trying to give attention to everyone even though he knew it was impossible, and whenever he saw stuff for him, for Anti, he tried his best to give it attention. Even though sometimes it left him curled up in a ball under his desk, trembling as he held in tears and glitched and he tried to forget the curses that they threw his way and how all the fanart with him in it made him look so- so- so evil.

But right now he felt happy. He was doing okay, he really really was. So he smiled to himself as he turned off the camera and started getting the video ready to be posted.

After a few hours he was done and he started to look at his social media, still feeling happy and energetic as he looked at all the amazing things his- Jack’s community had made. And then he caught a glimpse of something on tumblr and his heart just kinda stuttered and the static that had grown so quiet flared up and he glitched and glitched and he tried to back away from the screen because why- why-

It was a blog. A blog dedicated to him, to Anti, but- but-

“Ow ow,” Anti whimpered, glitching so hard he was sure he would have bruises later and tears starting rolling down his cheeks. “Why- why do they hate me so much?”

Page after page of people insulting him and threatening him and screaming at him and it hurt it hurt it hurt- And he started to gasp as he sobbed and glitched and his ears were full of nothing but static as he cried and cried.

“I- I didn't do anything,” he cried, curling into a ball as he tried to hold himself together but it hurt it hurt so much and he couldn't stop the sobs or the glitches or the static and his heart hurt and it was so loud and his body hurt and all he could feel was pain and because nothing he had done was enough and they still hated him so much and- and-

“I- I can't-” he sobbed, pain too much as his body twitched and glitched and tore and it hurt so much and he just couldn't take it anymore and he tried to pull himself off the floor even as his arms jerked and bruised and glitched and he clenched his eyes until he was finally on his feet and he staggered and half fell into his chair and he reached for the drawer in his desk where he had kept the thing that had freed him so long ago and he bit his lip so hard it bled but the static was just so loud and his body wouldn't stop and he glitched and glitched and it *hurt* and he couldn't stop crying and he turned on the camera and held the knife from the drawer in his hand and he cried to the camera and he whimpered, 'Why? Why do you hate me so much? I- I just wanted to be real-'

And suddenly his neck glitched so hard he choked for a second but still he swallowed hard and tried to open his pure black eyes one more time and he cried, “I- I just wanted to be happy.”

And then with tears running down his cheeks and with shaking and twitching arms he finally, finally put the knife to his throat,

and cut.

I just wanted to be happy

But that didn't end it now did it?

After all he had started out that way.

So instead of being ‘freed’,

He trapped a part of himself instead.

“No,” Anti whimpered desperately. “No no no.”

“I'̕m ̨síc̛k of̨ pr̨et̢e͠ndi̴ng,” Anti's pain and suffering sneered, finally controlling the body.

“No,” he begged, trying to break through, trying to get back, but he was stuck again and all he could do was watch through the body's eyes at it threatened and spit and yelled at the camera, at the community.

“Mo͡cki͘ng҉ ̷m͡e,” it snarled.

“Please-,” he cried, he didn't want this, he cared about them, he didn't want this. “Please.”

“Í'͜m͜ ͘in c҉o̵n͟t̷rol,” it seethed and spit words full of venom at the camera. “S̷e͘e̴͏ ̵y̸o̕͢u̷ s̸͜͠o̡o͘n̨͘.̢́ ”

And with that it shut off the camera and posted the video and all Anti could do was sob and sob and hit the invisible walls that trapped him in the body's mind as he tried so hard to fix this because this wasn't what he wanted this wasn't what he wanted-

“Please just let me out please please,” he whimpered softly, but it didn't do anything. No one was listening. And finally he gave up and slowly crawled into a corner of his invisible prison and he hugged his knees to his chest and he cried.

“I just wanted to be happy,” he whispered brokenly as tears trickled down his face. “This- This is my fault. This is all my fault.”

“I deserve this.”

49 notes · View notes

seyaryminamoto · 7 years

Photo

And here we are! Another March 26th, another of Gladiator’s anniversaries has come. What a Fourth Anniversary it has been, eh? Thanks to every last one of you for your support through these years, and through this week too as I posted the collection of fanarts seen above!

Under the cut, one of my long-winded ramblings, this time about the story that has changed my life beyond belief.

Admittedly, this hasn’t been an easy year. Personally, I’ve had some struggles with my surroundings, with school lately, with circumstances that often overwhelm me.

Not everything goes right, in fact, most things won’t unless you actively work to make it so, and even then there’s a chance things might fail, too. Nothing is as frustrating as putting your life and soul into something, and being told that it’s not good enough. It’s happened a lot to me, more often as time goes by, actually.

Amidst this chaos, with these struggles of so many different natures, there’s one place I can run to where I can forget everything that plagues me. Where I can give myself away completely, invest all my energies into it, and regardless of what people may think later on, I will still feel that every effort was worth it. And that one place, that one haven I have left, is undoubtedly Gladiator.

From the start, I’ve written and posted fics because I hoped, somehow, that they might reach people who would enjoy them. I haven’t said it a lot, but in the middle of writing Origins of Pro-Bending I had a brief crisis in regards of fanfiction, where I ended up asking myself why was I doing it at all? Did anyone really want to read this? Why would they, when there were likely so many other better fics and writers out there?

I told myself to finish that story, though, not because of desperate hopes that someone out there would read it one day and validate it by saying “Oh, this is the best story EVER!”, but for a very much simpler reason: I wanted to finish it. I wanted to see the final product. I wanted it to exist, if just so that I could go back to it one day in the future and enjoy it fully all over again. Maybe nobody else would read it, but as long as it mattered to me, it meant it mattered to someone. That view counter could stay in 0, but the story would have been told. And that was what I needed the most.

The same mentality is what guides me with Gladiator: I knew it would be the largest project I’d undertaken in my entire life (and indeed it is), I knew it would take me FOREVER to finish it (and indeed, four years have gone by, but this story is still not done, clearly!). I was warned by so many people about the possible negative consequences of writing it: you get used to the initial hype, but the people who’re supporting you now won’t support you forever. Some might be gone tomorrow, others in two years, others in ten. You won’t be in the limelight forever, and if you lose courage because of that, you’ll lack the strength to finish this huge-ass story that you’ve put so much work into and everything will have been for nothing.

So with all the potential problems, with all the possible drawbacks (I probably could have been a way better student in school if I hadn’t taken up such a time-consuming project, yes...), I still told every last one of them that I wanted to do it. That I would keep doing it, no matter what.

Yes, there’s been hard times, and yes, there have been moments where I’ve doubted myself as a writer, as a human being even, as ANYTHING, because of the responses my stories can get. Yes, I’ve struggled with motivation a few times when people who used to love this story passionately now seem mostly disinterested in it, and I can’t help but wonder where did I go wrong. I’ve learned sometimes you don’t go wrong at all, that people just move on... but maybe I did go wrong somehow, too. Maybe I did.

But even then, I can’t let go of this. I cannot stop writing this story, and I won’t stop until I reach the final scene. It’s the first story that has made me laugh so much, the first story that brought me to serious tears while writing it, the story that seems to bring together absolutely everything I’ve learned through life, where everything I am is reflected. Maybe this story isn’t half as big a deal as I make it to be, but for me it’s more than just a story. For me it’s more than just the longest Avatar fanfic on FF.net, it’s more than just a ship manifiesto, it’s more than a hobby I dedicate myself to when I have some time off.

I’ve been asked how I do it. How do I have so much motivation, how can I write such a long story and not stop, not get tired, not get bored? There’s a ton of answers I can give to this question (one of them being, of course, that my passion for the two characters who drive my story is responsible for all that motivation). But the truth is, I live in a place where I am used to seeing misery, pain, horrors every day. I see a city decaying around me day by day, a country in collapse, with next to no hopes for something to break its fall. Things aren’t easy here, and worse obstacles pop up every day, too. I’d rather not go in depth about the Venezuelan crisis, but all the same...

What keeps me sane, in this insanity, is Gladiator. Reality can outdo fiction in many ways, but my reality falls short in many regards, and I’m powerless to change it. But whenever those overwhelming waves of depression start climbing up, trying to drown me, I find myself afloat again because I still have to write so much more! I have so many stories plotted, so many story arcs, so much content that I can’t wait to produce. Because Azula still needs to become the greatest of all Fire Nation leaders, because Sokka still needs to end the war and make sure his people stay safe and sound. Because Zuko has to find what life means for him, because Suki has finally found happiness after all the sorrows she has seen, because Rui Shi needs to tell Song how he feels, because Ozai and Ursa’s past need to be revealed. Because all these characters need to bring back balance to the world that lost it, and they will only do it if I write it. This story won’t tell itself, and I don’t mind it: I want to tell it. I want to explore every last bit of it, and every new Word doc I open to write more chapters is a blank page I can’t wait to start filling.

I’m not the greatest writer ever, regardless of the people who may say so, regardless of how many readers may think highly of my skills. I could be better, no doubt, and that’s why I keep going back to the story, to fix all that can be fixed, to make it the best it can be. The best I can make it as I am. I will continue to grow as a writer, or at least, I’ll try to. I will grow as an artist too, hopefully, and continue to accompany the fic with as many of my drawings as I can.

It may sound insane, it probably is. But regardless if that’s not the case for anyone else, this story is more than a story for me: this story is my release, my opportunity to dream, to imagine, to believe, to feel so many things that I’ve been numbed to in my daily life. Gladiator sets me free. Gladiator is a part of me, and I’m sure it will continue to be for the rest of my life. I love this story more than words can say. And as it was when it came to Origins of Pro-Bending, writing Gladiator already is its own reward. Any and every companion who comes along for the ride is a great friend to have by my side in this quest: Whether they stay or they go, I’m glad they were here for however long they were.

Thank you, to everyone who has been here, everyone who still stays by my side, everyone who may come in the future. This story exists because a stubborn, reckless girl decided one day that she wanted to dedicate herself to something a thousand times larger than she was. Something that, she hoped, would be cherished by those who might be compelled by the story of a Princess and a Gladiator falling in love, who will do everything in their power to right the wrongs of the world they live in.

There’s still a long road ahead, and a challenging one at that. My life may be very different by the next of the story’s anniversaries, but I’m sure that I will still be here, and that I will continue to tell this story. And I will be grateful forever that I get to be the unbelievably fortunate writer with the privilege of bringing this story together. The sum of my life’s decisions have brought me to this day, and I find myself filled with gratitude, relief, peace. I know I chose the right course, and I will continue to tread it as I go. I will carry on writing this story, for however long as it may take me to finish it, and I will continue to be grateful to no end for that one PM that started it all, that gave me the incomparable opportunity of becoming the writer of Gladiator.

167 notes · View notes

Last Seen Blogs

zadlzenamrcha

Biuš

curckmutg

Untitled

degelnando

Sin título

imfricking

ralts

kurokonoheadcanon

homo basketball headcanons