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black-lake · 4 months

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astro observations 11

your astro granny is back, I've been doing this for so long omg. some of it is venting, like always, so ignore that, but maybe don't you may find words of wisdom there. anyway, enjoy. also warning, it escalates to heavier subjects fast 🪐 🔭

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🕰️ Virgo and gemini risings can pull off any type of glasses, sunglasses, bug-eye glasses, cat-eye, mirrored ray-bans, you name it. They even look cute with goggles no joke. They also make the smart and academia aesthetics look so cool and elegant in a chaotic way, not in a taurus capricorn way but in a- 'I spilled coffee on my boss's laptop this morning and I'm still talking about it way- because omfg- did you see the way they looked at me? it's like I've done it on purpose or smth but I didn't, not sure if they have a crush on me or they fucking hate me, what do you think? I'm pretty sure they don't hate me tho, but I can't tell, do you think I should quit?' 🎙️🎬

🕰️ I recently looked up George Clooney's chart and omggg, it all makes sense. The moon conj saturn in capricorn, giving him that nostalgic wise aura along his taurus sun, uranus and pluto opp ascendant kind of indicating finding his perfect partner later on in life, venus in aries and mars in leo, he's fiery but that fire so damn well contained with all the earth. His asc and jupiter in aquarius, yeah only an aquarius women with so much air and intelligence can maintain his attention and lock him in lmao. His synastry with Amal Clooney reminds of that of Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively. Manifesting a relationship like this for everyone reading 🧘🏼‍♂️✨

🕰️ Personal planets in scorpio 10° or 22° is a sexy mf combo, esp moon, venus, mars and asc, it gives bedroom eyes and seductive domineer, also godmade bone structures. 🗿

🕰️ Pluto opposite or square ascendant, a very classic aspect for friends/coworkers/admirers/people in general turning enemies and talking shit behind your back. This aspect can easily make people speculate, overanalyze your actions, assume things, spread rumors and lies about you out of jealousy and intimidation.

🕰️ Any planet conjunct the desc can bring the physical manifestation to that planet's shadow side, up to 10°. It can conceal traits of that planet in the sign it’s in, as it’s descending and escaping the sun’s light. Pluto on the desc brings a few shadow traits out of people and conceals their true intentions from the native. So the native has to face those traits, learn to see them from miles away, to discern what people’s intentions are and whether it's that or their own perception and fears. In other words, they start from naive to paranoid to bs detectors, and it takes a long painful journey to get there.

🕰️ Even tho personal planets on the desc are much easier to see and handle, venus on the descendant can bring shallow traits and empty promises out of people, mars on the descendant, not as easy, can bring out anger, toxic masculinity and aggression. Saturn on the desc can bring immaturity, irresponsibility, immoral and disloyal behaviors out of people, stagnation, delays in connection and loneliness, pushing the native to learn patience and endurance. The native will meet people with such traits over and over again until they learn to spot and discern them faster and take the right action. ☔️

🕰️ I’ll keep talking about it in this blog cuz it’s always been one of my biggest challenges. What I learned with pluto on the desc is that you will keep attracting the same kind of enemies to challenge you if you don’t own your power and stop diluting yourself for someone else's fragile power hungry ego, because people will have a problem with you anyway. Also don’t hold too tight to anyone, never be afraid to lose people, because trust me you will. Almost no one is meant to stay in your life, they’re meant to transform you and leave. The only thing you’re meant to rely on is your power and independence. The moment you see it the easier cutting ppl off becomes.

🕰️ I have venus in aries and I find myself always having a girl crush on celebs with this placement, Rihanna, Marilyn Monroe, Audrey Hepburn, Elizabeth Taylor, Jennifer Aniston. They all seem to share that fiery independence mixed with a childlike but fierce demeanor which I admire, plus they never age. 🐈‍⬛

🕰️ I have mercury in aries and mars in scorpio, but for some reason I’m fascinated by people with mercury in aquarius and mars in sagittarius, with mercury in aqua I always expect something fascinating about their minds but I can't guess it cuz it's always different, but females with mars in sag omggg the sass is hilarious, I can’t help but laugh when they get blunt, loud and shady out of nowhere lmfao.

🕰️ Speaking of placements I’m fascinated by, what’s the deal with moon in taurus? I keep thinking it must be… nice.. to have? people that have it are so grounded and serene it makes me think it’s the best moon sign. If you have it please share the emotional difficulties you experience, because I can speak of every moon sign emotional traumas in detail but for some reason I be romanticizing this one. ☕️

🕰️ Another placement I really admire is moon conjunct saturn, there’s just something unspeakable, that isn’t tangible (even tho they have timeless mesmerizing eyes) but on a soul level I can sense their wisdom and nostalgic aura. It’s like there’s a balance of feminine and masculine qualities which come out in their mannerisms. People that have it, Timothée Chalamet, George Clooney, River Phoenix, and every hot man ever.

🕰️ Have you ever asked yourself why Morgan Freeman has such deep unique and easily recognizable voice? It's his mercury conj uranus in taurus. Who else has an easily recognizable voice, Kim Kardashian, mercury conj uranus in scorpio.

🕰️ Having the axis of virgo-pisces over your sun-moon, like virgo sun opposite pisces moon, or mercury-moon can give someone a soft voice, their voice can even be therapeutic and healing. Think of Michael Jackson's speaking voice.

🕰️ The hardest aspect in any chart for me are oppositions or squares to pluto, saturn and chiron. These are easily the most challenging aspects you can find in a chart.

🕰️ Those that have lilith/pluto in the 1st, 6th, 7th, 10th, 11th tend to have haters in their workplace, in groups or wherever they go often. It’s saddening but I’ve seen it a lot. Can also make ppl copy your style or attitude then hate on it, and never admit they got inspired by you.

-- potential triggers in the following one, pls skip if necessary.

🕰️ Difficult planets on the angles, saturn, pluto and chiron mainly can truly mess with someone's mental health to the point of them wanting to- yeah that. The most drastic effect is when they sit on the descendant and MC, since it deals with connections, groups of people and the public, a lot of it is outside of the native's control, and at times more than what they can handle. Their usually painful past experiences and memories has shaped their perception of the world to a dark and despairing one where they don't see a better future for themselves. A few examples, Kurt Cobain (chiron and saturn conj desc and pluto conj asc all tightly opposing), Mac Miller (chiron conj desc, saturn conj asc and pluto conj MC). Marilyn Monroe (chiron conj MC and saturn close to the IC, pluto conj nn).

🕰️ I see every major astrological transit as a collective test, lesson and preparation for the next transit. It made sense that corona happened when pluto was in capricorn, a pandemic that restricted our freedom and made us prisoners in our own homes. There was a stellium of mars, jupiter, saturn and pluto all in cap the moment quarantine started in march. It was all about teaching us to respect societal rules and structures that keep us safe, whether it had to do with the government or the medical system, whether it was real or fake or real fake. Yes you have to give up some freedom for safety, that’s how surveillance and security cameras everywhere you go work, for your safety.

🕰️ It taught us to care for the health of humanity, to live responsibly and respectfully when in crisis, even if that means compromising our freedom and limiting our movement. Trusting that the structure built over the past decades is somewhat reliable and helpful. We saw how some people put their own freedom above anything and anyone out of superiority, that's the selfishness we collectively needed to face before pluto moves to aquarius and we are given freedom we didn't learn how to appreciate or use responsibly. We had to learn the value of personal freedom vs discipline and structure.

🕰️ There are two planets I’ve seen repeatedly in people that manifest like magic, saturn and neptune. To add a third it would be uranus. Conjunctions and oppositions to these planets are like superpowers in manifesting your desired reality. All work in different ways.

🕰️ For example people that have personal planets conjunct saturn (esp sun and moon) are easily attuned with the physical world and have some sort of control over time, turning it backwards or forwards, making themselves look younger and older at the same time, knowing the actions to take to bring anything into the three-dimensional world.

🕰️ Now this leads me to an astrology book I recently came across, the Alien Constructs the work of Edwin Steinbrecher and Stephanie Jourdan, discovering aspects that constitute an alien chart. The alien construct occurs when one of the outer planets, that is saturn, uranus, neptune or pluto, is conjunct or opposite the sun, moon, ascendant or the chart ruler. An individual that has one or few of these is different from other humans, they possess supernatural abilities, and typically have rough childhoods and adolescence.

🕰️ Every aspect with each of the outer planets has a unique ability, for example when the sun conjoins an outer planet it's called Power Alien Construct, the moon conjoining an outer planet is a Vessel Alien Construct, an outer planet conjoining the ascendant is an Instrument Alien Construct, an outer planet conjoining the descendant is a Shadow Alien Construct. Saturnian aliens are able to manifest things in the physical realm, plutonian aliens are masters of metamorphosis and irreversible change, uranian aliens are able to see the future and raise energetic frequencies.

🕰️ Sun conjunct pluto is Plutonian Power, aliens are able to destroy that which is not built upon truth, understand the true nature of birth, sex, death and power, generate energy and power, integrate polarities, perform psychic surgery, see beneath solid surfaces, shape-shift into animals, minerals or plants, heal utilizing sex, magnets or lasers.. etc. Moon conjunct uranus is a Uranian Vessel, aliens are able to comprehend the cycles and trends of the futures, safely corral erratic energy or electricity, channel high-frequency beings, telepath to imprisoned or trapped individuals or animals, sense the formation of inventions and innovations. Look it up, it's fun and tell me what alien construct are you and how you relate to it. oh it reminds me of a post I did a while back of aspects as superpowers.

Happy pluto in aquarius 🛰️✨ (will come back in years and see how this aged)

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benewol · 1 year

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beat the shit out of them [Vin Jin x Reader]

this work is heavily influenced by @wannaeatramyeon 's works, especially her unhinged reader fic featuring vin!! no warnings, reader can also be considered genderneutral as far as im concerned just a bunch of cussing tbh. hope you enjoy :))

"Vin Jin."

...

"Hey, Vin Jin."

...

"I'm fucking talking to you!"

The next thing he feels is a harsh smack on the back of his head as he quickly catches himself before the chair can tip over.

"The fuck do you want?! Fucking crazy ass bitch," he rubs the now throbbing, sore spot you gave him, face scrunching up as usual.

Dramatic motherfucker.

"If you didn't tint your glasses over so much you wouldn't be getting smacked. You would've seen me preparing to swing, too," you smirk in retaliation, your arms moving from their crossed position to resting next to your sides while you're leaning against his table.

He merely sends you what you think is probably supposed to be a nasty glare and re-positions his legs on that same table, nudging your back with his polished sneakers.

So you continue talking.

"Mary's been trying to gesture for you to leave the classroom without making a commotion, you know."

"Okay, and?"

"Your bff needs you and that's all you can say? Really?" You roll your eyes.

"Can't be so important if it only took you to solve it."

"Fuck off."

"Lol, you first."

"Sure. Tell me why you keep tinting your glasses and I will."

His eyes furrow inquisitively.

"I don't need to do shit. Class is starting soon so you need to move your fat ass soon anyway, might as well do it immediately," his smug smile one of those you'd love to fill with a pile of some of his ridiculous sheets of lyrics crumpled up.

That's a good idea. You're adding that to your list titled 'what would piss vincent the fuck off'.

"Your sense of time is, unsurprisingly, tremendously shit. We have another half an hour left, you moron," you reach out your hand to flick his wide forehead, which he now sees coming and dodges, catching himself before falling yet again.

What a fucking loser, you shake your head and keep yourself from succumbing to laughter.

"Whatever. I'm not showing you shit."

"Come on. I'm sure whatever it is you're blowing it out of proportion," you reach out again to touch his glasses.

He reaches out too. To stop your hand from moving towards his sunglasses. And his grip is not as harsh as you'd expected it to be.

"Stop it. If you see it, I'll have to kill you."

"See what? You're being so ominous. Do you have weird rectangular pupils like goats or what?"

He sputters for a moment.

"That'd be funny."

"The fuck?"

"You could come up with a line like 'my eyes are like those of a goat, yeah, I'm the GOAT'," you press your lips together to stop the laughter from spilling out of your mouth.

That line was good.

He won't tell you that, though, because you were way too close to uncovering the truth.

He huffs, turning his head away from you and crossing his arms in front of his chest.

What he doesn't know is that his oh-so-clever self forgot to re-tint his glasses.

This in turn means the sun's rays hit his lenses so nicely you were able to catch a tiny glimpse of his two grey irises and the resulting pupils in his left eye.

Your breath catches in your throat.

A soft gasp makes his head turn back to you, his eyebrows shooting up in surprise.

"What's that? Pulling a stupid line like that and immediately growing quiet?" He mumbles to mask his alarm.

You hum, and he notices your solemn expression, making him grow apprehensive.

"Weren't you Cheonliang's number one?"

"Still am."

"And Allied's number two?"

"Yeah."

"How come you don't just lose the shades and simply beat the shit out of anyone who comments on your eyes, then?"

He stares at you. Still occasionally having rubbed the wound you'd inflicted on the back of his head, he loosens his arms which were crossed behind it.

Placing them on his thighs, he balls his fists.

"Shut up."

He abruptly stands up and moves towards the door, shaking the table you were leaning against, making you furrow your brows in irritation.

Typical.

At least you'll know where to find him.

If things don't go his way, he'll just lock himself in the boys' bathroom and listen to one of Duke's albums.

You don't intend letting him flee the scene this time, though.

"Don't you dare run away now."

He doesn't know why, but he halts in his steps.

"Or else what, pipsqueak?"

He turns back towards you.

"Your eye adds to your nonexistent charm."

...

"Hello?"

...

"Earth to Vincent?" You wave your hand in front of his shielded eyes.

Turning on his heel, he doesn't leave without wanting to have the last word.

"Fucking weirdo, I don't need your pity."

"Asshole, I'm not pitying you!!"

What you fail to see is the faintest of rose-coloured blushes on Vin's cheeks as he puckers his lips, absentmindedly scratching at his lenses while sauntering down the hallway.

#vin jin x reader #jin hobin x reader #lookism x reader #genderneutral reader #lookism reader-insert #lookism fanfiction #lookism fanfic

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foxes-that-run · 5 months

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Keep Driving

I love him so much. My 1 step plan to make anyone love him is watching him perform.

youtube

He said of Keep Driving when he first played it at the NY ONO show:

And before the next song, I wanna say thank you to my good friend and collaborator Mitchell Rowland! Say hi daddy! (laughs) I wrote this next song with Mitch and he supports me in every way possible, he literally makes me sound so much better, thank you for being on stage with me and thank you Sarah!

The screen s when he performed it on love on tour were lover/fine line pink & blue.

Keep Driving is a stream of consciousness, snapshot moments of a life, interspersed with asking his love if they should continue, noting they have overcome hard times. The tempo is important, it becomes more disjointed and chaotic when he is distracted and it calms and returns to a happy pace when he communicates with his love, checking in how they are. The question is almost rhetorical, he wants to continue and is reminding himself to not lose the connection with his muse.

Harry and Taylor have sung about communication and being tongue tied a lot, so Keep Driving is important growth. To me, it sounds like the way Harry posts to social media, seemingly random things that hold meaning to him. It could almost be 'should I keep scrolling?' as that also speaks to interaction without communication.

The title is a Haylor theme, @womanexile has a post of the times they refer to driving here, which is many of their pivotal songs.

Lyrics

Black and white film camera Yellow sunglasses Ashtray, swimming pool Hot wax, jump off the roof

The B&W film camera makes me think of polaroids and Taylor's OOTW line "You took a polaroid of us and discovered the rest of the world was in B&W and we were in screaming colour." A line Harry referenced in his IG feed for 2 years from when that song came out, they were seen at the same place on the dates of most colour photos.

Taylor wore yellow sunglasses and a men's shirt in the 22 MV shoot. The 22 MV also has a with a pool and acting up.

Harry refers to hot wax in Hunger "Candles burnt down to the floor / Wearing less than you wore before"

A small concern with how the engine sounds We held darkness in withheld clouds I would ask, "Should we just keep driving?"

Harry can hear their is a concern with the relationships engine, he notes they have overcome troubles before and rather than running he talks to his partner. Huge progress on communication.

This chorus plays an important role in the tempo and meaning of the song, stopping and talking to each other to ask 'should we keep driving' calms the tempo down, when he and his beloved stop talking and get distracted by the other things it gets chaotic. The message is to communicate. He can see a trouble in the relationship, but they overcome difficult times before, by communicating things calm and it continues.

I Know Places: "Something happens when everybody finds out, see the vultures circling dark clouds" also the Me! MV has their phantom/ghost as a cloud. The Late Night Talking MV also has dark storm clouds at 2:37.

Maple syrup, coffee Pancakes for two Hash brown, egg yolk I will always love you

This verse is telling of a private times together, with common breakfast items. Harry has also referred to breakfast in the unreleased Hunger "We would stay in my house for days / Spilling breakfast on pillowcases"

Passports in footwells Kiss her and don't tells Wine glass, puff pass, tea with cyborgs Riot America, science and edibles Life hacks going viral in the bathroom

Harry missed his flight before the NYE kiss because he left his passport in his mum's car.

Kiss her and don’t tells is self explanatory, but speaks to the long period of time Harry was dating Taylor and constantly asked about her in interviews. The point he made audiences laughing because he’d say “I think the thing is with songwriting…”

Cyborgs are in the Ready for it Music Video. In the BTS Taylor also (1:25) calls them this. The BTS videos are messing with H, complete with edging the way she speaks and how sassily she says her and Joe's birth years will be together.

Cocaine, side boob Choke her with a sea view Toothache, bad move Just act normal Moka pot Monday, it's all good Hey, you Should we just keep driving?

So much attention is on the cocaine line here and in daylight. He did have some tiny pupils in late 1D days. To Howard Stern he said "Who ultimately do you want to be at the end of the day?' You don't want to be the guy who died. You don't want to be the guy who's like whacked out on drugs. You want to be the guy who's 70 and playing for three hours because he can, and he wants to, and everyone's loving it, and he's having fun." Gosh I want that for him.

Harry referenced the Seaview in the Adore you video. Taylor and Harry have both referenced sea views, with the Cannes IG posts, the sl*t lyric video and promotion for cruel summer.

There's no sideboob shortage around Mr Styles. OW had some when this song was coming out, but HH was mostly written before before they met. I think this is Taylor at the 2013 People's Choice awards. It was 2 weeks after the boat break up, rumors if there was shading or a hickey, different Red era style. She also had sideboob at the 2013 VMSs when they may have gotten back together.

Taylor chipped a tooth on stage and just acted normal. This happened August 2013 while they dated.

Finally Harry has sung about Coffee three times, always about communication, which is the message of the song: Falling "And the coffee's out / At the Beachwood Café", Music for a Sushi Restaurant "Late night, game time / Coffee on the stove, yeah" and here.

#haylor #keep driving #harry styles #harry’s house

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the-evil-lovable-simp · 3 months

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Sideshow Bob x vampire reader

Part 2

Since Bart's family didn't know you were a vampire, they had invited you on a day out, and unfortunately for you, it was a grand sunny day. As you were walking down the streets you were getting many weird looks, you were wearing a big sunhat with big sunglasses and you were holding an umbrella over your head. But there wasn't a cloud in the sky. You were all heading to a fair, it wasn't too far, and that's why you guys had decided to walk, much to Homer's dismay. As soon as you got there the two kids ran away and then you noticed that Marge and Homer had disappeared with the baby and then you were alone with crowds of people. You sighed and started walking around, it was hard to walk around through people with an umbrella. You watched the people run around and scream, that's when you saw someone sitting at a bench on their own, reading a book, it was...oh what was it, oh yes, Robert. You got out of the crowd. You slowly walked towards the bench and gently sat down, so quietly Bob didn't even notice.

"Hello, Robert," You said as elegantly as possible, he jumped slightly, not expecting anyone to be near or talking to him.

"Do, do we know each other?" he asked, you angled the umbrella so he could see your face.

"Oh, it's you, nice to see you again...um, I do apologize, I never got your name," he said trying to see your eyes under your glasses.

"It's (y/n)," You giggled.

"Well, I'm starting to think, (y/n), that you're stalking me," he said in a joking way. You laughed "Oh, no no, if I was, you wouldn't know!" You continued to laugh as his died down after you said that last bit. He then looked at the umbrella, this confused him further. He closed his book, this, attracting your attention.

"What are you reading?" you asked, he looked down at his book and then back at you.

"Only one of the greatest authors known to man, Shakespeare, the book I'm reading is called, Macbeth," He announced proudly.

"Oh, Gulielmus, for short I liked to call him Will" Bob stared at you perplexed as you continued.

"I even read some of his non-published books, he also gave great head," You said looking satisfied.

"The nerve, there's no way any of that happened," He argued as you stared at him blankly.

"Ok" you shrugged, he stared at you, expecting something else, he did not understand your humour.

"Soooo, what do, um, people do for fun in fairs?" you asked getting closer to him, scooching on the bench. It still surprised him that you were this interested in talking to him even with all the things he's done. He looked at the fair and then back at your face.

"Let me show you," he said getting up and putting his book away, he turned looking down at you, putting his arm out for you to link. You smiled, showing off your fangs. You shot up, energetically linking arms with him, you almost knocked him over. You put your umbrella over both over you, it only just fit over Bob's hair. You set off, walking towards a stall, there were no lines so you didn't have to wait. The man inside got excited because he finally had customers, he ran up to the counter, while the other guy was asleep on a stool.

"$10 for four goes," the man said.

"And people call me criminal," Bob grumbled to himself.

"What?" You asked even though you heard him, he coughed.

"Nothing..." He answered quickly, putting down the money and the man put down the four balls. "Now, what you have to do is hit the bottles with the balls, like this, watch," He said grabbing one and throwing it, it did hit it, but nothing happened, "ergghhereeh" you heard him.

"I'll try again!" he states, he grabs another and throws it harder this time......still nothing.

He hit his fists on the counter.

"This game is rigged I tell you!!!" He yelled as the man owning the stall jumped and looked scared, you wondered why.

"Can I try?" You asked, this caught both the men's attention.

"Sure, I don't want to do it anymore" Bob said giving you the last two balls. You put down your umbrella, it was ok since you were under the stall's shade. You aimed, but not at the bottles at the man on the stool, and you threw, you hit the man in the head making him fall over, but he didn't wake up.

"BAHA ha ha haha haa!" You heard next to you, you looked and saw Robert laughing.

"Ha ha ha you're haha you're supposed to hit the bottles!" Bob explained while still laughing.

"Oh," you said, you lifted your arm, getting ready, you lifted up your leg, and you threw, you used a lot of strength in this throw. The ball Caught on fire, it hit the bottle, but it also knocked over the table and all the rest of the other piles of bottles, ending up with them all smashing on the floor.

Bob and the man who owned the game you just ruined stood there with both their mouths agape. You turned to them with a wide smile.

"What now!?" You asked excitedly.

"Well, I think traditionally," Bob gave the man a scowl, "You get a prize," he smiled threateningly at the man, the guy cowered.

"Well, I h-have these," the man said presenting some Krusty the Clown merchandise.

"Ehggeehgah" Bob grumbled, "Don't you have anything else?" he said miffed off.

"Well..." The man gulped "I have these, years back some businessmen said they didn't need them anymore," the man explained putting down some really familiar cuddlies. You gasped and grabbed one, it looked like Robert, but in a weird green skirt thing. Bob's eyes widened, he had forgotten about those embarrassing things.

"Is this you!?" you asked amazed, Bob started fake laughing.

"Ha ha ha, (y/n) don't be preposterous, you jokester ha ha!" He said trying to change the subject.

"Well, it looks like you," you said.

"It sure is him-" The man started to add on to the embarrassment.

"No it's not!!!" Bob snapped.

"Well I like it," you said grabbing your umbrella once more, this caught Bob off guard, you like the cuddly of him?!?! You started to walk off, Bob gave the man one last scowl and ran to catch up with you, to talk some more.

(guys this story is also on wattpad)

#the simpsons x reader #sideshow bob x vampire reader #sideshow bob x reader #sideshow bob the simpsons #sideshow bob #im a simp for the 🌴#🌴#bart simpson #homer simpson #marge simpson #lisa simpson #maggie simpson #vampyr #vampire reader #funny #I swear it will get more romantic if I don't give up on it

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graham-needs-a-nap · 1 year

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I have like 3 followers and this post is not for any of them. General spoilers for Deus Ex: Human Revolution and Mankind Divided (and I guess original DX)

I think Adam Jensen is a deeply tragic figure. Obviously the game sort of states this, and you can pick some dialogue options that indicate he's not happy with what happened to him, but he doesn't seem REALLY bothered by it, and it all falls kind of flat when he has cool robot arms and cyber eyes and mirrorshades, right? But I see some details that really throw a few things into relief for me.

Most obviously, he was heavily modified into a tactical suppression cyborg against his will - admittedly to save his life, but going above and beyond the necessary, and in such a way as to make him company property. Their logo is literally visibly stamped into his skull. On paper, this is sure to mess anyone up. There are details that can be found in his apartments in the two games, like that he keeps getting upset and breaking mirrors, and that he's taken up watchmaking as a hobby. I really like the watchmaking because he, you know, needs some way to practice his dexterity with his new robot hands, and also I think it shows a newfound interest in the internals and perhaps the function and purpose of machines, which he now largely is.

I think the sunglasses tell quite a lot of a story, mostly in the times where they're absent. The first time we see Jensen after the prologue is him walking into the Serif offices for his first day back on the job and he snaps the shades on as soon as he gets in the door. I think we don't see them open again until he finds Megan in the late game, because this is someone he knows and loves, that he's spent the whole game searching for. He can be open with her. But as soon as it dawns on him that she's here willingly, working for these people who wrecked his life? Letting him think she's been dead this whole time? He backs away and the shades come back on. Shields up, baby. I don't have comprehensive notes on his behavior in the second game, but the only time I can recall that we see his eyes is when he's talking to Eliza Cassan, the AI news anchor who was used to lure him into a trap in the last game, who on the surface he has no reason to trust. Until you consider that they're both entities poised between humanity and an artificial existence, used as tools of far more powerful forces and struggling to define who they are going forward. That's who he can identify with, far more than anyone else he meets.

On a personal note, the shades thing is behavior I recognize! In me! I wear sunglasses almost any time I'm outside, even on cloudy days, because I have really sensitive eyes. but I have also suffered from social anxiety and especially had issues with eye contact in the past, and shades are a convenient way to avoid that, especially if I'm also upset about something. I have this not entirely rational belief that people can see all my feelings in my eyes and the glasses are a shield for that.

We don't see much of what Jensen is like before the attack, except that he (clearly sarcastically) claims to Megan that he's extremely friendly and likes everyone he meets. What's clear is that Jensen NOW is extremely uncomfortable in all social situations. Everyone's animations in these games are weirdly jerky and way too fidgety, but with Jensen, the fact that you can't see where his eyes are tracking gives the impression he is actively looking for a way out of this conversation right the hell now, and would rather look anywhere than directly at the person he's talking to. (Is this intentional? Almost certainly not. It's a consequence of the generally weird talking animations for NPCs. But if we aren't going to look for unintended interpretations in our media then what are we even doing here?) Someone may be able to make a case for this being neurodivergent coding, but I'm not an expert on such things and I don't feel comfortable making that claim, but I would say severe social anxiety at bare minimum.

I think even his voice is fascinating in this regard, and Elias Toufexis deserves a ton of credit for this that I suspect he rarely gets. It's gruff but also soft. He almost never raises it, and generally gives the impression that he'd rather not be bothering anyone or being noticed at all. Again, you and me both, buddy.

And the cap on all this is not just the physical changes but the way his entire role in society, the way he interacts with the world, has changed. He has, apparently, next to no personal life. He's a corporate security officer in the first game and a counterterrorism agent in the second. The only things he is now allowed to be good at are infiltration, investigation, assassination, all on the orders of corporate or governmental powers (as if they aren't the same thing by this point), with the added layer that the true masters of his fate are between one and three simultaneous global conspiracy groups who are mostly interested in him as a clone template for the main character of the original game. He's a super badass cyborg spy who desperately wants to be anything but. It's incredibly sad!

Side note: there are a lot of theories, based on stuff you can find in the VersaLife vaults in Mankind Divided and the weird handwaved plot points about the new augs he suddenly has, that the Jensen in that game is ALREADY a clone, with the body of Human Revolution Jensen kept in cryostorage with its augs stripped out to be given to Clone!Jensen. I find this to be pretty solid speculation, but this is not confirmed and Jensen has no in-game way to learn or react to this. I haven't fully fit it into my take just yet, except that finding out you're a clone would probably fuck anyone up, though for Adam maybe it would be just another day at the conspiracy factory.

The ending of the last DLC for Mankind Divided strongly implies that Jensen has finally caught wise to at least a part of the invisible conspiracy he's enmeshed in, and I hope is preparing to take some action against it. Given that, you know, the original Deus Ex still has to happen, I can't see it going particularly well for him. Adam is quite likely doomed. But maybe he can bloody Bob Page's nose a bit before he goes out. I can't help rooting for this poor socially anxious cyborg and I fervently hope we get a resolution to his story eventually.

#deus ex #deus ex human revolution #deus ex mankind divided #adam jensen #oh god is adam jensen my blorbo #finally writing this all down in one place so i can stop retyping it whenever i want to yell at someone on the forums about it

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sasuhinasno1fan · 4 months

Text

Secret wedding

@etherealxgenie guess who's your secret santa again this year? So, I struggled a little coming up with an idea for wedding , and then this came out. This is an au where the miraculous don't exist, so apologies for the long explanation of the before. I hope you like it and happy new year!

Soft music played through her speakers, allowing her to focus. Hand sewing a design might be incredibly time consuming but she was fine with this. the crescent moons along the lapels of the suit would match perfectly with the suns on the matching jacket. She still wished it could be white, but she was thankful that the lapel design was even agreed to.

“Marinette?” her mother called, knocking on the door before it was pushed open slightly and her head poked in. “You have a visitor.”

“Is it Nathalie?” she asked, feeling tense. Her mother usually waited for her to invite her in, so her coming in without waiting felt nerve wracking.

“No, no. um,” her mother hesitated.

“Dupain Cheng, let me in. we have a problem!”

“Chloe?”

Not seeing much reason to stall, her mother opened the door and the blonde walked into her room, looking perfect as always. Her oversized sunglasses were blocking her eyes and she looked untouchable as always, even with this supposed problem.

“What are you doing here?”

She and Chloe weren’t friends. Well, sort of. They didn’t go out of their way to hang out, not unless their buffer of Adrien was also present. Life in middle school made it very hard to be around each other, but after learning a bit about Chloe, Marinette found it hard to hate her as much. She had her moments where she pushed her, that was for sure, but she learned to see past the immediate reaction of snark. She’d gotten better at seeing when she meant it versus when she was hiding behind it.

“Have you spoke with Adrien recently?”

“Um, sort of? We had a fitting a few days ago.”

“And he wore that?” it was hard to tell with her glasses, but Marinette assumed she was looking at the suit jacket she’d been working on. The black fabric with silver moons lining the edge was opposite of the white jacket and original blue moons she originally had Adrien request.

“His dad suggested it. Adrien agreed.”

“I’m sure he also agreed to the 50-course dinner at the reception.”

“50?” she noticed her mother hadn’t left and she looked as stunned as she felt. “The reception I had with your father only had 10 courses, and that’s because we had a hard time picking foods both he and I agreed on and matched each other so they had separate rounds.

“I’m so guessing Luka is fine with the 2000 guests who’ll be attending this wedding at the Notre Dame Church.”

“2000? Wait, Notre Dame? Isn’t it still technically closed for reinnervations? They’re still attempting to replace the stained glass.”

“Thus is the problem. The Lukadrien wedding isn’t about Lukadrien anymore.”

Marinette would credit herself with getting Adrien and Luka together. It wasn’t her plan, far from it. She had a crush on Adrien since he gave her his umbrella during his first few days. She’d only seen Chloe’s best friend, not the kind person he was until that moment. She could admit now she went way too far in how she felt, her crush an obsession at first. She felt entitled to his love because he went out of his way to be nice to her. God, it still made her cringe remembering how she acted whenever anyone gained a crush on him themselves. She had a full schedule to know where to find him! She didn’t realise in her attempts to get him to like her, even with her awkward ways and inability to speak a full sentence to him, she was just setting him up for someone else.

Juleka she’d known forever, since her first day of school, but she’d never known she had a sibling until they became better friends in their second year. She got to meet said sibling when invited for the debut of Kitty Section during the city-wide music festival. She’d been upset that Adrien had to cancel last minute and was instructed by Captain Anarka to go get Luka. She’d been impressed with his calm demeanour, how confident he was with how he teased her and back off when he felt like he went too far, his ability to calm her with such a simple song. She was sure if she wasn’t obsessed with Adrien, she would have given Luka a fair chance. After a large fight between the Captain and Agent Roger, Adrien had appeared, saying his dad changed his mind. She’d been so eager to see him she hadn’t thought to give him a warning of the piano right where he was walking. She watched him gush over it and Luka easily invite him to join their band. After their performance, Luka asked Adrien if he’d consider joining officially, even as a temporary member, to which he agreed. She should have noticed when she’d find Adrien texting Luka. But she believed Alya when she talked about how Luka must like her and how it would be a matter of time before Adrien figured out how he felt.

God, how was Kagami still friends with her? Her crush on Adrien made her do some insane things.

She and Alya had been blinded by the idea that their friend group would all be together, but others had started to see. Kagami tried to warn her, but she’d been too focused on trying to beat her. Kagami didn’t shy away from making it known she liked Adrien and she was more than happy to be his practise date. She managed to get herself invited and dragged Luka along with her. It was supposed to be ice skating, a ploy to get Adrien jealous.

God, Luka was so sweet, knowing exactly what was going on and still willing to be used. To this day it felt like she couldn’t apologise enough for what she’d do. She’d stare right at him and call him Adrien. How was he still friends with her, even now? Kagami picked it out very quickly that day, telling her her attempts at getting closer to Adrien was actually pushing him closer to Luka. The two had spent an hour of the practise date skating with each other, Adrien laughing and squealing as Luka lifted him easily. She said that if she wasn’t careful, Marinette would be pushing him straight to Luka. She thought it was some tactic to throw her off.

Things all came to a head when they participated in the Bob Roth video contest. Since Adrien wasn’t involved in public performances that wasn’t on the Liberty, the band wanted him in the video, which helped birth the idea of the masks and complimenting shoulder pads and braces to hide their identity. When they found out the contest was just a way for XY to get new material to copy, they’d all stormed over to the TVi studios. Adrien got him, Luka and herself inside and when Bob Roth threatened to have them framed as copycats and go after their families, it had been Adrien who stopped Luka from getting into a fight with him.

“Luka, don’t! If he wants to act like he can outsmart us, fine. We’ll just have to see which of us is more popular. Paris’ angel or a hack of a DJ.”

He’d gotten them back to the Liberty and gone live on his Instagram, revealing he was in the band before telling the whole of Paris what happened, how they signed up for Bob Roth’s contest, the video Marinette had filmed and edited, making sure to show the time stamp for then the file was created, how XY stole it. He even talked about how, yes, he could be lying, but asked them why he’d go through the effort of showing evidence instead of just asking for those to take his word on it. Turned out Adrien had more followers. Kitty Section got their song back and a contract to boot though Adrien got into trouble with his dad for being in the band. He had to officially withdraw from them but Luka told him he was more than welcome to join their jam sessions anytime.

“Kitty Section won’t be the same without you.” Luka had said. “Even if we won the fight, losing you doesn’t seem worth what we got.”

If anything, that had to be the moment, the one that filled Adrien’s heart. Because on Adrien’s fifth name day, the day Marinette felt confident enough to give him her gift and tell him how she felt, Luka had been waiting for him at school. Adrien had talked about how he always wanted flower as a gift, like someone going out of their way to buy him flowers and give them to him just because, not because of who he was. With a massive bouquet that she found out from Juleka that he made himself, he told Adrien he liked him, a lot and if Adrien was up for it, he wanted to take him out on a date. Adrien agreed, happily. Her heart broken then, since she didn’t quite realise just how right for each other they were at the time. Her friends, minus Juleka and Alix, were surprised and Alya was mad. She refused to go to school, refused to answer his concerned calls or texts and just followed what he did during then on social media.

Adrien gave up a lot to do the things he wanted. He got to attend school but with the pressure of placing first always, being the best in fencing and doing what his father wanted no matter what, it kept him from having normal things he wanted. She hadn’t known it at the time, since he kept it a secret for so long, but in order for his father to not dismantle Kitty Section himself, Adrien offered to leave himself, giving the excuse of a busy schedule to any people who came to Kitty Section for him. Adrien’s schedule got busier when news about dating Luka got out, but that wasn’t the only thing. She later learn he accepted more jobs and orders to keep Luka, to not break up with him. His father wasn’t allowed to touch Luka, not change him to fit the brand and in return, Adrien looked near exhausted with all his jobs he’d been doing. Marinette finally talked to him after finding out he threatened Lila after she got her expelled with the stolen necklace trick, finally explaining why she’d been so quiet.

“I’m sorry Marinette. If I’d known…I wish I could say I’d feel different but I think I always had a crush on Luka, ever since I met him. I am sorry that I made you suffer though.”

And how was she supposed to be mad at him? She hadn’t talked to him for weeks and he still went out of his way to protect her because to him, she was his friend and that’s all that mattered. She’d looked at those dark circles, how he was laser focused on his phone anytime Luka would text and she knew what she had to do. Chloe had actually been the one to help her expose Lila, to embarrass Gabriel a little so he had to ease up on Adrien to save face. She eventually got over her crush, apologised more times than she could count and gave out her parents’ pastries like band-aids. She was there to see their relationship grow from casual boyfriends to something strong enough to withstand so much. Adrien’s dad in general, the knowledge of Luka’s dad, the public’s opinion, Bob Roth being Kitty Section’s manager, Adrien’s career and his fight to get Felix to be friends with him again and Luka’s anxiety with school coming to a head when offered a place in his dream university, but for in person only. Through it all, they supported each other, any fights were resolved with honest and real apologies and never wavered from each other.

So, when Luka came to her to ask for help with a proposal, she jumped at the chance. Somehow, they managed to hide it from the whole of France and the two had their private proposal inside one of the Le Hotel Paris event rooms, the one Chloe said Adrien would daydream about being proposed in as a child. It was when the announcement was made and planning started, that things took a turn.

With school and the influx of jobs Adrien had been shouldered with and Kitty Section about to go on their first tour around France – since the international tour was agreed upon for that summer between semesters – Gabriel and Nathalie took on most of the planning. Both grooms wanted small. Adrien even wanted it at his house, so the statue of his mother could represent his mother being there, even though he hadn’t been back to the mansion since he moved out to a shared place with Nino, Luka and Nathaniel. Adrien wanted to wear white, another nod to his mother who loved dressing him in white formal wear and also sneakers. Luka agreed that most formal shoes hurt after an hour. Luka didn’t want a big cake, as he didn’t really like it, or a strings quartet for the band. He wanted a local band the two liked and for their first dance to be the last thing they did before leaving as a moment between them to calm everything down. Marinette had been commissioned to make their suits and was working on the little details – crescent moons and suns on suit jackets – when Nathalie interrupted.

“Adrien would look much sleeker in black and they should match. So, you’ll need to change your design.”

Adrien had look flustered but he told Marinette to switch it, apologising. She had brushed it off as being busy but she should have known it was more. He gave up a lot of freedom to have what he wanted before, why would it change now? Everyone knew Gabriel didn’t like Luka, it wouldn’t be a stretch for Adrien to hand over control just to still be able to marry Luka in the first place.

“How bad is it?” she asked Chloe.

“Rocker boy called to say Adrien is hiding inside their closet after a meeting with his dad about the order of the ceremony. I don’t know what was said, but this is getting insane. The original list was 120, and that was with others plus ones. If we don’t do something, the wedding might be off and I have not given up on Adrien and trusted him with that rocker for that to happen. So, let’s go.” She turned heading to the door when the designer called after her.

“Go where?”

“To plan a secret wedding for them to elope. Can’t stop them after that.” She stated. “Hurry up!”

Marinette had no other choice but to pin the needle in the lapel, dumping her sewing equipment on the desk and grabbing her bag before she ran off after the blonde. If anything, she needed to make sure Chloe knew what secret event meant. She had a habit of going overboard with planning.

________________

“Hey kitty.” Luka said, softly knocking on the door of the amoire – Adrien begged for them to have it when Felix offered it, but Luka still thought it looked stupidly ostentatious next to their other items – hoping to get an answer. Calling Chloe had been a last-ditch attempt. Nino had no luck and a meeting to run off for, being a well-established DJ. He already knew he had zero luck and he’d hoped Chloe could do something. All she said was, “Oh fuck this. enough is enough.”

He was a little scared about what that meant. He still had a fiancée in the closet who refused to move after explaining the decisions his father made about their wedding. He didn’t argue about Gabriel being involved orginally, hoping he’d actually listen to what his son wanted, but seeing how he’d done this since Adrien was in collége, choosing what he wanted the brand to look like rather than his own son wanted, was clear things weren’t going to change and Adrien was bearing the brunt of it. He wish he argued against it more. He wanted to keep him safe from his dad and he was failing at that.

“Kitty, can I please come in?”

The door swung out, revealing Adrien sitting surrounded by their longer clothes. He shuffled to the side and Luka climbed in next to him, shoving the clothes over as much as he could. He stayed quiet as Adrien pulled the door closed, leaving them in the dark. He understood why Adrien was hiding here, it felt nice. When he went searching for Adrien’s hand, it gripped his tight as Adrien dropped his head onto his shoulder.

“I should have never accepted my father’s help. I should have seen the increase of schedule for what it was, his way of breaking me down so I had no choice. I mean, the Notre Dame?”

“It’s a beautiful church.” He said, knowing the silence meant Adrien was glaring at him. “I’m not happy about it either but Adrien? All I was is to get to say I do and call you, my husband. Do I wish we could do it our way? Yes, but I just want the day to end with us together.”

It was clumsy, but Adrien was able to pull him down to kiss him. He pressed an extra kiss against his forehead, holding tight to his hand.

“I just wanted this to be perfect for us. I was going to step away from the Agreste brand after the wedding but its like nothing I do will get us away from him.”

Luka couldn’t disagree. Everything down to Adrien’s major in university was chosen by his father. Adrien wanted to be a teacher, either a music or physics, even fencing, but Adrien was majoring in business. It felt unfair he was able to work on his anxity to get his degree in music while attending school was all Adrien wanted but he wasn’t allowed to persue what he wanted. Fighting and arguing with Gabriel Agreste was a tempting thing but he knew as easily as he defended Adrien, his father would easily snatch Adrien away. He meant it about not caring how he married Adrien, just as long as he got to call him his husband at the end, but with how much Adrien has lost or given up in his life, he wanted Adrien to have the wedding of his dreams, not something that reflected the Agreste brand.

“I just kept saying yes. Why did I keep saying yes?” Adrien moaned, mad at himself.

“I said yes too. I knew you didn’t want it but I still agreed.” Luka reminded.

“Because I told you it would be easier to tell them what we want and for them to deal with everything. You’re just as busy too. Now this dream is becoming a nightmare and I don’t know how to wake up.”

As much as he could in the space, he hugged Adrien, pressing kisses into his hair. His phone rang, finally giving light to the closet.

“If it’s Nathalie or my father.” Adrien started.

“It’s Chloe. I’ll put it on speaker.”

“Luka?”

“Marinette?” had Chloe gone to Marinette? “You’re with Chloe?”

“More like she burst into my room but yes.”

“Oh, who cares Dupain Cheng? Couffaine, where’s Adrikins?”

“I’m right here Chloe.”

“Good. Less relaying of messages. Have you gotten your marriage lisence?”

In the dim light, the couple were able to share confused looks.

“Yeah? Everything’s been turned in. Nathalie took care of it weeks ago. I even checked.” Luka said.

“Perfect. Adrien, come over to my hotel room tonight and Couffaine, go see Dupain Cheng an hour after.”

“Why? Chloe, what are you planning?”

“You’ll see.”

“Are you sure this is gonna work?” Marinette asked. “Don’t they have to do this in city hall?

Chloe didn’t say much before she hung up, leaving the two to share confused looks.

_________________

“Techincally it just has to be officiated by an elected official, such as Daddy.” Chloe said, watching the garden be set up. “I already had him check, technically this isn’t against the law. Besides don’t you want them to be happy?”

“Of course, I’m just worried. We’re going against Gabriel Agreste. Aren’t you worried?”

“Please, my mother loves Adrien, she’ll ruin his father to make him happy.”

Marinette still worried but decided to trust her. Adrien was Chloe’s best friend and she was risking Gabriel’s anger to do this. She already managed to book a private garden and get a team to set up a flower arch and a long farm table for the guests. If she managed to come up with this and leagelly execute it, she was going to have to trust her.

“Mari, they’re here!” Alya called from where she had Nino’s phone.

“Perfect. You’ve got it here?”

“Go Dupain Cheng.” Chloe ordered.

Felix met Adrien and Luka until she got there, looking unmoved by his cousin’s multiple questions, instead admiring Luka’s motorcycle.

“Finally. Marinette, he’s not telling us anything. What’s going on?”

“You’ll see. Adrien, go with Felix. Luka, with me.”

More begging for answers happened but eventually, they followed orders. Leading Luka to the trailer Jagged got – because he was all for annoying his father-in-law and making his son happy even if he couldn’t be at the wedding to keep the chances of being found out low – Luka was silent until they got there.

“Is this something that’ll make Adrien happy?” He asked.

“Has he guessed what it is?”

“With what Chloe asked, he has hopes but isn’t sure.”

Smiling, Marinette nodded. “Yes, it’ll make him happy.”

Luka stared at her, no doubt looking for a lie in her song. He eventually nodded. “Alright then.”

“When you’re done changing, follow the path where you’ll meet up with Adrien. From there, just trust us.”

___________________________

Adrien stilled in the doorway, staring at the suit on the hanger. His mom liked dressing him in white formal wear, saying he brought light to dim events. She was still around when he realised, he was bi and she took the news easily.

“Do you think one of us would have to be in white?” He asked, when talking about his dream wedding, this time to a guy.

“Why can’t you both be in white? Sweetie, remember, white doesn’t make the bride. Queen Elizabeth started that trend. I could care less what you wear, as long as the person you marry is someone who makes your heart sing and be full of love.”

When he found Luka and when he proposed to him, he knew then he would be in white, so his mom would know that man made his heart so full. The added blue moons were to represent Luka, blue being his favourite colour and the moon representing the times Adrien snuck out of his house at night so they could hang out. Luka’s suit would have suns on the cuffs since he called Adrien sunshine for so long. But then his dad wanted him to be fitting of the Agreste brand. They would be in sleek black with no colour. He just bearly got his father to agree to the silver moons, Luka’s suns having to disappear completely. He’d only gotten to try on the original jacket once but there the full suit was. Blue crestent moons clustered on the lapels on the top and the lining of somehow subtle black cats against the grey background. It was his suit, the suit he was going to get married in.

“Felix? Did Chloe plan a wedding for me? With Marinette’s help?”

“The most surprising thing is that they didn’t kill each other through this.” was all Felix said before ordering him to get changed and leaving him.

Adrien pulled on the suit carefully, taking his time to put on every piece and notice the details, like the stitched peacock, with his mother’s initials on the side that sat over his heart. Luka’s initials was on the cuffs, like he assumes Luka’s suns were, on the arm closest to his heart. Like all of her creations, like Marinette was able to hide her name, she was able to disguse the initials so they didn’t look heavy, but he knew they were there. A pair of neon green sneakers sat on the table, the letters AC painted onto the heel of them, the date painted on the side. He took in the whole look in the mirror, smiling at what looked back at him. This was everything he wanted to see on his wedding day.

Remembering Felix’s instructions, he left the trailer and walked up the path. Waiting in the middle was Luka. Adrien couldn’t help but smile at the navy suit, seeing the specks of yellow on the cuffs. His own sneakers were the same colour as the lettering on his, his own lettering matching Adrien’s sneaker colour. His fingers looked oddly empty without his normal rings but by the end of this, they’d have matching rings.

“Hi.” He called, smiling at Luka, who smiled back at him and easily took him in his arms.

“Hello. You look amazing.” He said, fingering the blue crescent moons. “figured out what’s going on?”

“If I knew you weren’t that amazing of a liar, I’d think you had something to do with this.” Adrien said, already spotting the initials of Juleka and their mother on his sleeve, just above the suns. “Who do you have on your heart?” Adrien asked, wondering if Marinette sewed it like his.

“Yours.”

“I have my mom’s. I hope that’s ok.”

“Trust me, she’s the only one I’d willing give my place too. I think she would have been in on this, if she were here. I already feel close to crying seeing you, so who knows how she’d cope.”

Adrien laughed, dropping his head on Luka’s shoulder. “Not well.” the two stayed silent, taking in the feeling of what they were about to do. “We’re doing this right?”

“Adrien, I meant what I said. I just want to be married to you. but I also want you to have the wedding you want.” Luka reiterated, hugging him close.

“It’s starting to look pretty good so far.”

“Alright boys!” Alix, in a fitted suit and her hair pushed back, appeared behind them, gesturing to the rickshaw covered in flowers. “Your chariot awaits!”

The sight and knowledge of what was going to happen, caused them to burst into giddy giggles, before they climbed in. It got even funnier when Alix started tossing rose petals behind her as she pedalled them down the pathway.

“Alix! We’re getting covered here!”

“Go with it cinnamon roll.”

Luka dusted off as many petals as he could, tilting Adrien’s face up to press a kiss against his lips. “I love you.”

“I love you too. Ready to do this?”

“I’ve been ready since I knew I loved you.” Luka said, pressing their foreheads together, right before they both got a face full of petals.

“Whoops, sorry!”

Finally, petals stopped being flung as Alix slowed to a stop and the two got to see what Chloe had been working on. On one side was the decorated farm table, two almost throne like chairs sitting next to each other on one side, their friends all sitting in their seats at the table. On the opposite side, was a stage covered by a tent covered in flowers and ribbon, with the band the two wanted waiting by their instruments. Their alter was a flower arch, covered in peonies, Luka’s favourite flower, in every colour imaginable. M. Bourgeois Chloe standing underneath, Marinette and Juleka all waited for them at the top of their aisle as they got off and Alix ran to join the others in her seat.

“This is for you.” Juleka handed one bouquet of roses to Adrien, “and this is for you.” she said, handing the bouquet of peonies to her brother.

“Are we going together?” Adrien asked for clarification.

“Seems silly to make you go separately now. You two had to fight to be together, might as well stand with each other for the biggest moment of your lives.” Marinette said, making sure their suits were straight and everything was ready. “Did you notice your shoes?”

“What about them?” Luka asked, looking back at the ‘LC’ painted on his. Then he noticed Adrien’s. he looked at Marinette, who just smiled at him. A glance at Adrien with a sheepishly shy smile confirmed it. Adrien wanted his last name instead of Agreste. Without Gabriel breathing down their necks, Luka would happily give it all if Chloe’s dad could get the paperwork in quickly enough.

“Chloe?” he said, watching her arch a brow, “Thank you.”

“You’d better keep that promise even more now. I didn’t give him up for you to make him sad, do you understand me?”

“I won’t.” Luka said, letting Adrien lace their fingers together. “I promise.”

With the band playing ‘Endlessly’ by Amaranthine, their closest friends and chosen family watched them walk down their aisle, still holding hands when they arrived to Chloe’s father.

“Dearly beloved, we’re gathered here today for the union between Luka Couffaine and Adrien Agreste. We are witnesses to their love and to see the commitment and promise they’ll make to each other. Now, because I was told the actual ceremony I do takes too long,” the crowd laughed as Chloe shrugged, “And the planned wedding was also going to take too long, we’ll skip to the vows. Who would like to go first?”

“I will.” The two turned to each other, and Adrien took a deep breath. His father wanted him to write his vows ahead of time so they could be edited and he’d been putting it off for so long because of it. but looking up at Luka, he knew exactly what he wanted to say. “Luka, when we first met you, I had no clue how important you were going to become. You didn’t know me, past what all of Paris knew and your sister telling you I was pretty nice, but you welcomed me so easily, it felt like you weren’t real. You are an incredible listen and I always felt at ease with you. getting to know you everyday we texted or got to hang out made me wonder how a relationship would work. I didn’t know yet how I felt, though Kagami tried really hard to get me to see it. but I wouldn’t change what happened after. You always put others ahead of yourself and you were ready to fight Bob Roth for us and I wanted to be your shield for once. Having to officially leave Kitty Section sucked but what you said that day suddenly made it so clear to me. I wanted to scream it from the rooftops but I also wanted to keep it to myself. You knew the life I had, the things I had to give up, the troubles and you still decided you wanted me. I knew I was going to fight for you, but that made me fight harder. I’ll still fight for you, even if it meant dealing with wedding details, I didn’t want just so I’d still end up at an alter and marrying you. I love you Luka Couffaine and I am so glad you choose me.”

“I would choose you 1000 times over. I didn’t know the bright sunshine I’d get in my life when I met you. you were like a curious kitten, not knowing the world but wanting to know everything. It took a while to realise you knew how to use your claws. Skating with you that day, watching you have fun and smiling, I knew any other crushes I had weren’t going to compare to what I had for you. watching you rip into XY and Roth made it even more clear. Seeing you sad that you had to leave Kitty Section, I knew I wanted to do whatever possible to make you smile. it didn’t matter what your dad threw at me, I wasn’t going to give up after you said yes. You always give up things you want to get something in return and I’m making it my mission that you won’t ever have to do that again. Even if you answer with ‘I’m fine’. I’ll protect you with all I can.”

Adrien couldn’t help but kiss Luka, biting down a smile when the Mayor coughed to interrupt them.

“Can I have the rings please?”

The two shared panicked looks, as Nathalie was the one who held their wedding rings they choose, one of the few things they could pick. Nino, however, ran up and handed the Mayor a small string bag. Overturning it into his palm, the Mayor held out their rings.

“Let’s just say, Felix is really good at not getting caught.” Nino explained as he headed back to his seat.

Adrien shot a look to his cousin who just raised an eyebrow. Normally he’d scold him, but he wouldn’t this time.

“Luka, repeat after me.”

“With this ring, I thee wed, to have and to hold, through sickness and health, till death do us part, for all my days.”

“Adrien?”

“With this ring, I thee wed, to have and to hold, through sickness and health, till death do us part, for all my days.”

“By the power invested in me, by me and the city of Paris, I now pronounce you wed. you may kiss your partner.”

Everyone cheered, but Luka and Adrien were deaf to it as they lost themselves in the kiss that sealed them together for life. They pulled away, pressing their foreheads together, smiling at each other.

“We did it.”

“Good wedding?” Luka asked.

“I got you so I think we’re doing good so far.”

“And it’s only just the start.” Luka promised.

__________________

Gabreil found out about his son’s engagement from social media, two days after the fact. Pictures of the actual proposal and a selfie of Adrien showing off his ring. Seemed only fitting he found about the marriage the same way. He’d tasked Nathalie with making sure no information about the wedding he planned was leaked, to make sure it was perfect. When she came running in and shoved her iPad in his face, he thought she lost her senses. A video of Adrien and his fiancée walking down the aisle, bouquets in their hands. A photo of them at an alter of a flower arch, Andre Bourgeois standing as officiant. Their first kiss as husbands. at a table cutting into a simple round cake, decorated to look like the setting sun. multiple candid shots and videos of them and their guests – all of their friends and no parents or adults around – dancing with that band he’d forbidden playing. A short clip of the married couple slow dancing to a Disney song as the others held sprinklers to surround them in sparkling light.

And to round the post off, a selfie of Adrien and Luka, holding up the wedding rings that had gone missing when Felix was last at the mansion.

Finally married to the love of my life. Can’t wait to spend the rest of my life as a Couffaine.

#lukadrien #secret marriage #elopement

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jamisonwritestf2trash · 6 months

Note

part three !!! :3333 theres probabky gonna be 2 or 3 parts following this one... im also unsure why, but an underline appears under colored text on mobile now? dunno if its the same on the tumblr browser.

anyway, enjoy a bit of sniperscout and spydad ;)

------------<3

Sniper sighs as he drives down the lonely highway, the trees overhead casting enough shade that he doesn't need to wear his sunglasses, but he keeps his hat on. It's his good luck charm. His mum gave him it, and he doesn't plan on loosing it.

It's now been a week since Scout vanished. Sniper didn't outwardly show it, but he's just as nervous as Spy is.

A few months back, Scout had come to the camper with a rather sad looking bouquet of flowers and asked him on a movie date. And Sniper had said yes.

They'd been secretly dating since, and only Medic knew about it, and promised not to tell anyone. "It's not my place to deciee when you're ready to tell everyone", Medic had said.

Sniper wanted to be mad at Spy for making Scout so angry. But he couldn't be. Not after seeing how wrecked the Frenchman was, even after Scout's mother came to the base for a few days. She had left yesterday to return home, and made Spy swear to find Scout and keep him safe.

Sniper taps his finger on the wheel. There's a bit of broken glass on the road. Someone would have to clean it up later---

A flash of red lying on the side of the road catches his attention and he slams on the breaks.

What the bloody hell is that?

Hesitating, he pulls the van over and hops out, jogging the way back towards the red he had seen. And his blood runs cold.

"Jesus christ..." He whispers, and speeds up to running, grabbing his comm and radios Engi, since Sniper knows that the Texan always has his comm with him.

"Truckie, you there?" Sniper asks into the comm, and stares down at the mess with his hands on his hips.

"Yes sir, what's the deal, Stretch?" Engi replies. Sniper scowls at the stupid nickname.

"Find Doc. I found Scout." Sniper crouches down at the runner's side. "We're out on the highway. I don't want to move 'im, I.. I think he got hit by a bloody car. He doesn't look too good.

"Stay where you are." Engi orders. "We'll be there soon."

Spy knew immediatly when he heard Engi yell for Medic to get in the "goddamn ambulance" and drive.

They must've found Scout. There can't be another explanation. Spy looks out the window of his smoking room to see the ambulance pull out of the base's garage and speed away, sirens blaring.

He brings the cigarette to his mouth with a trembling hand.

When Scout was a few months old, Spy had come home to find him wailing in his crib. Heather wasn't home, so he assumed that she must've gone out to buy more baby powder. So that left Spy to take care of baby Scout.

And he did what a father should do. He picked up baby Scout out of the crib and sang him a French lullaby, and was able to get him to sleep again. He stayed in Scout's room until Heather returned, but he had also fallen asleep. She had snapped a photo, and Spy kept that photo in his disguise kit behind his cigarettes.

If only times could be that simple again.

Don't worry anon I'm pretty sure the color underline is happening for everyone. Anyway! Good job as always :)

#minificanon

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dreadsuitsamus · 1 year

Text

Getting Revenge on Jiraiya Headcanons | Jiraiya x Reader |

author's note: i saw a video on facebook and it inspired me to write something silly lol also i have no idea how to actually classify these? they're more than headcanons but i just don't always want to write a full-fledged story with allllll the details, i like the bulleted list telling a story too but to call them headcanons feels inaccurate. does anyone have any suggestions?

pairing: jiraiya x fem!reader

warnings: the relationship depicted is a little toxic lol nothing too crazy though, jealousy and an on and off relationship, light angst, mention of pregnancy loss

You and Jiraiya have an on-again, off-again relationship

However often you always find your way back to each other, there is eventually an off phase again and that's when shit gets out of hand

The two of you are so obviously in love and hooked to the hip even without being official anymore

But... Jiraiya is gonna Jiraiya regardless, whether it's with you or someone else

And you hate it

It's not cheating in the slightest, but it still creates an ugly feeling in the pit of your stomach when you talk to him the morning after an outing

You know the specific glow on his face and his tone of voice when he's gotten laid

they never make him glow like you do

And sometimes, you can admittedly get a little toxic

But Jiraiya loves it when you get jealous, no matter what the consequence is when he purposely prods you to react to his latest hookup

And his toxic trait, along with intentionally setting you off, is that he gets mad at you when you give him a response like he wanted

he thinks it's hot when you're angry tho

The latest encounter will probably be his last though, which is saying a lot

You were out with some friends at a club, dressed to the nines and celebrating Tsunade's birthday

you don't know how old she is and you're afraid to ask

You're having a damn good time, until you happen to glance over and see Jiraiya with three women

One is rubbing his shoulders while he smirks with his stupid face, rubbing one's stupid inner thigh, and sucking a hickey on the other's stupid neck

Your face twists into a jealous fury, and Tsunade notices fast

She pulls you aside. "How are you ever gonna find the right one for you if you're busy with the Jiraiya song-and-dance?"

That makes you pause. You never really thought of actually dating anyone that isn't Jiraiya

You frown. "You're right. I can't keep doing this."

Tsunade smirks "Then make your last act of revenge count."

god she's hot when she starts scheming

Jiraiya never takes his hookups home, which gives you and the girls the perfect opportunity to hatch your plan

You all head to the nearest supermarket and giggle as you make your way to the craft section, heels clicking against the floor and heads of the various employees and customers turning

You quickly pull together your supplies and rush for the register, your friends having to hold Tsunade back from putting an old man with funky sunglasses in traction

The girls follow you out to take the train out of downtown and eventually get to Jiraiya's place. You use your key to get in and set it in the glass bowl he keeps by the door for the last time

You and the girls each don a container of colorful glitter and get to work, saving the bedroom for you alone as they sprinkle it in as many annoying places they can think of

You head upstairs and grit your teeth, unleashing all of your anger as you glitter his room. You throw it on the carpet, digging your heel in to make sure it's really in there. You put it on his clothes, his master bathroom, and finally his bed.

You're surprised when you feel tears falling down to your neck and chest

Nothing hurts you more than not being with Jiraiya, and to see him with another woman (or three) is excruciating. You've loved him for ten years now and it breaks your heart every single time you part with him

And he moves on so easily every fucking time. As if he doesn't care. As if you're easy to replace. You could never find a hookup within a week or two after a breakup

Your eyes settle on a framed photo hung up on the wall. It was of you and Jiraiya from many years ago, and from what you both thought was the best date of your lives. You were both so happy and it brings more tears to your eyes

You knock the picture off the wall, leaving it face down in a pile of glitter

You toss glitter in a few more places before you're all out, throwing the bottle to the side somewhere and heading back downstairs

Tsunade looks at you carefully and brushes her bangs out of her eyes, and quickly calls the rest of the girls to hurry up in case Jiraiya comes home early

You all leave and head back to another club to get what Tsunade referred to as "white girl wasted"

and god were you fucked up

When you're next conscious, it's because your phone is ringing right in your ear

You push your head up, the world around you spinning and the sunlight burning your soul. You check your phone to see it was one in the afternoon, and Jiraiya was the one making your phone ring

"Pfft... 'm not answerin' that one..." You snort, flopping your head back into your pillow. You're not even sure how you got home, but you're thankful for it nonetheless

Eventually you get up to eat and then shower, and when you go back out to your bedroom with your body only covered with a towel, you find Jiraiya sitting at the edge of your bed with his head ducked

You frown. "You should leave."

Jiraiya looks up with fury in his eyes. "I don't think so."

"I'm too hungover for this." You mutter and walk to your dresser.

"You glitter-bombed my house." Jiraiya says, clearly not letting you walk away from this.

"How do you know it's me?" You scoff.

"For starters, I have a Ring camera." He deadpans, "Tell me what you remember of last night."

You inhale deeply as you search your drawers for something to wear. "I went out for Tsunade's birthday."

"And that's it?"

"Obviously." You mutter, lying through your teeth as you pull out a crop top and a pair of underwear. "Look away, perv."

he doesn't

You drop the towel and pull the top over your breasts quickly and follow suit with the thong-style panties, turning and crossing your arms at him

"So what do you want?"

"You should be nicer to the man who got you home safely last night."

You blink, and Jiraiya stands tall with his impressive height and muscle. You forget just how big he is sometimes

"That's right." He crosses his arms. "Even after I came home and saw the mess you made, I still got you home."

"You saw it already? What, you shoot your load early with those bitches last night?"

Jiraiya smirks at your bitterness. "You know more than anyone I'm no one-pump-chump. And I didn't sleep with them, you green-eyed monster."

You narrow your eyes. "Liar."

"I swear on that baby of ours in heaven." Jiraiya says solemnly, looking you right in the eye.

You stare at each other for a long moment before you finally break the silence. "Why are you here?"

"It's time to settle this, don't you think?"

"I settled it last night."

Jiraiya pulls something from his pocket. It's your key you left behind. "You call this settling it? You left your glitter in my house! You'll be stuck on me forever, whether you like it or not. And something tells me, you little minx, that you like that thought."

"Of course I do. But I don't think you do. You move on so fast when we split. Do you even care?"

"I've never moved on from you once. I drink and fuck around to numb the pain of not having you. Every single time." His eyes are soft. "And when I saw you with your friends, I couldn't think of anything but you. So I went home early and found the mess you made, laughed at what I found and went out to take you home. Because you're crazy and I just can't get enough."

"Tell me you mean that." You swallow thickly. "Tell me this will be the last time."

"I'll die before I let you go again. And I really don't wanna know what you'd do to top the glitter revenge."

You laugh and move into his arms, embracing each other tightly and pressing your lips together

Naturally, he places a hand on your ass and gives it a squeeze

"I know what's good for that hangover. Let's just say that there's a little someone I know that's standing here in a thong that once said dick is the best way to cure a hangover."

"God, you're a pervert."

"The name's Jiraiya." He smirks

Dick was, in fact, the best way to cure your hangover

#jiraiya x reader #jiraiya x you #jiraiya #naruto #naruto shippuden #headcanons #fic #i know this is dumb and i should've just written it out entirely as a fic #but i like not having to necessarily finish out a complete thought and tie one thing to another

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hepatitushepatits · 5 months

Text

Egg headcanons! (Yes more) ((and yes this is if everything was happy and all eggs were alive))

Winner of 26/11/23 poll

JuanaFlippa is allergic to 20+ things (I can list them but that may or may not be overkill)

When Leo has panic attacks, Foolish or Vegetta or Roier will rock her and pet her hair to ground her (Def not projecting)

Pomme, Leo, and Sunny are lefthanded

Richas is ambidextrous

Pepito also has allergies. Pepito has juvenile osteoporosis and chronic pain, and on-and-off uses a wheelchair.

The Hope egg is named Tereza, and A1's real name is Ignacio.

Bobby is an empath

Tallulah has a small collection of photos of Wilbur and his friends from before the island, to recreate when they get out.

HOBBIES

Tilín, Bobby, Chayanne, and Empanada do wrestling

Chayanne is one of those kids whose in literally every program. Like, he does sword/fence fighting, archery, wrestling, kickboxing, baseball, futbol (soccer), martial arts, leatherwork, bookbinding, everything you can think of.

Dapper tap dances

Tallulah crochets and taught Wilbur and Philza to

Tallulah also figureskates

Leonarda does hiphop, tap, ballet, and latin dance

Sunny can do the BEST nails. Like. Seriously talented (in Tubbo's eyes) Example below.

Trump liked to work in animal shelters, and took the best care of all of them

MISC AGAIN

When they have to wash it, Empanada, Richas, and Dapper all go over to Felps' place to have it washed because he has a similar hair type and does it really well.

JuanaFlippa, Slime, and Mari all have matching gas masks. Juana's from her allergies, and Slime and Mariana because of Purgatory

Sunny has a rhotacism

Ramón has a really good fashion sense, and helps Fit out when he goes on dates with Pac.

When Tilín and Bobby wrestle, they try to drag Pepito in but he's too weak to fight (PROJECTING AGAIN, my cousins never wrestled with me because I'm disabled)

Pomme has like, whole bookshelves full of her journals.

Pomme is Muslim, and transitions from a shayla and a hijab, very rarely a niqab depending on the situation (if this isn't like. Accurate. To the Muslim religion tell me, I'll fix it. I don't wanna offend anyone.)

Richas just RAMS people with his forehead when he's playing

Half the eggs have bird wings, while the other half have normal dragon wings. Pomme is the exception, she has butterfly wings

Richas has no sense of personal space, due to sleeping in the Brazilians sleep room.

Tallulah loves Hamilton

Bobby has palilalia

The whole island has a theatre night once in a while, where the eggs act out movies and shows.

Dapper is a god of death devotee, as is Badboyhalo. I have so many headcanons about what this entails for them, rituals, their exact type of devotee, ect. I'll shut up tho

Carre taught Ramón to skateboard, so Ramón always has those knee pads on. Also he never wears a helmet, no matter how much Fit begs him to.

All of the eggs do speak, but not often. They mostly communicate through AAC devices which serve as tablets and also communicaters. They also use sign language. Also, they all have notebooks to elite in. So to be more accurate, the signs all around are the eggs papers littering the ground

Sunny has chronic migraines and headaches, so she's always wearing her sunglasses for that reason.

Sunny trailer park princess canon

Poncho Pepito. See below.

Also like a jumpsuit. Under. Idk.

You know that post that says that Pepito has those like children glasses? Yeah. That.

Tallulah likes Pepsi over Coke. Chayanne likes Coke over Pepsi. Sunny doesn't drink soda, besides ginger ale.

Sunny keeps her hair above her neck, because she hates the feeling on her collarbones. (projecting again)

She's literally stretched out shirt collars to being unwearable to stop it from touching her neck (me af)

Empanada has like. Neopolitan hair. Brown, pink, blond/white. She has vitiligo, and is black/japanese. Em's got like, onyx eyes? Like ddu. I forgot the English word. But they sparkle like obsidian, kind of.

Dapper loves watching Skeppy videos, but they reach the island very late

You know Wilbur's new album? He sent it to Phil, and he got it 2 weeks late (cuz international processing or whatever) and then Tallulah got to listen! She loves it! Her favorite songs are Glass Chalet and Dropshipped Cat Shirt.

The longest Sunny's hair has ever been is to her shoulders, aka when she first met Tubbo. She had it up in a bun to make sure it won't touch her skin. Sunny immediately asked him for a haircut on her first night at his place.

AGE/HEIGHT

Chayanne: 11, 4'2

Dapper: 10, 4'5

Ramón: 10, 4'6

Leonarda: 9, 4'8

Trump: 9, 4'2

JuanaFlippa: 9, 4'8

Tilín: 9, 4'3

Bobby: 8, 4'4

Tallulah: 8, 4'11

Richarlyson: 8, 4'4

Pomme: 7, 4'2

Sunny: 6, 3'9

Empanada: 6, 3'11

Pepito: 6, 3'2

MISC

Fit sometimes tells stories to Ramón about Schlatt. Ramón, so far, is absolutely infatuated. Big Guy is like a God, an idol to Ramón. (Did anyone watch his stream today? Just me? Alright)

Sunny has a cleft lip/palate

When Leo can't sleep, all the capybaras curl up around her with her in the middle, like a little nest.

All the eggs fucking love Pokémon. With a few exceptions (Ramón, Tallulah, Sunny)

Ramón likes blackjack instead. Or Egyptian Rat Screw.

Tallulah likes boardgames (she's a 'Sorry' lover)

Sunny likes Yu-Gi-Oh! better. Or Magic: The Gathering

Speaking of which, they all have those broadcast TVs, and very much live like in 2009 when you were running around during ad breaks, and dove back through furniture to not miss ur show. They can only watch Fed-approved-channels.

Pepito has a stutter and a lisp

Ramón is one of those kids who blends everything. Like. Spaghetti? Into the blender. Smoothie. Turkey? Into the blender. Smoothie.

His favorite is an onion, lettuce, mayo, ham, very thin cuts of shark meat, sweet gherkin, spicy pickle relish, and pineapple (I once knew someone who actually ate this. Daily. At lunch. Mauro you're now the inspiration for a minecraft egg) Ramón just blends it and goes lol

Welp. I think that's it. Thanks lol. I'd love to hear any of yours.

#qsmp #qsmp headcanons #qsmp help #egg headcanons #qsmp juanaflippa #qsmp quackity #help #qsmp eggs #can you tell who my favorite is #i dare you to guess

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luescris · 1 year

Text

Listen. Guys. Listen.

As you all may or may not know. I have a massive, huge despise for 2012!Shredder. The rage I feel against him will never die. I am one of his biggest haters.

..... However.

What if I told y'all. That I also have a Oroku Saki redemption au. Not Shredder. But Oroku Saki.

Don't get me wrong. They're both terrible people, one just less so than the other.

But here's the thing. Here's where this all started.

You all remember the episode when Shredder came back again in season 5 right??? How he was not at all himself, very much more of a mellow, depressed "follow instead of lead" kind of person???? And how he quite literally shoved Kavaxas back into hell??????

Hell must have done some real fucking shit to make Shredder rethink his entire life like that. Like no way in hell would he have ever helped the turtles out like that by his own free will before. It's something that I think about daily and I have not been able to get it out of my head because it was SO out of character for him and as much as I hate him and know that I nor the Turtles would never, in a million years, give him a chance of redemption for all the shit he's done...

That part has got me thinking.

Like. Imagine this. Somehow, someway, because of that sudden out of pocket good deed, Oroku Saki is more or less cursed. Cursed to go back to the living, but not as a living, breathing human being. Not exactly a zombie, but not alive either. And he is cursed to watch after the turtles until every single one of his wrongdoings are at least somewhat forgiven and he's able to maybe move on to the next part of life.

So like. One day, the turtles get back from a patrol in a mostly good mood, only to absolutely stop and freeze when seeing they have an unknown visitor sitting on the couch, waiting for them.

Said visitor being Oroku Saki. No burns, no helmets or armor, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, cargo pants, sunglasses and holding a coffee in his hand. And all he does is stare back at the turtles completely and utterly calm.

It takes a minute for something to click, but immediately Leo is on it, moving within the blink of an eye to press his sword against Saki's throat and hissing, "Give me one good reason why I shouldn't chop your head off right here, right now."

And Saki, ever so cooly, takes off his glasses and stares right into hate filled glare and goes, "You can't."

He then explains why they can't kill him, and how every time they try he would only bleed and nothing more, making a complete mess of their lair. April of course reads his mind (A bit too forcefully too because She Mad) but is surprised to learn that he was telling the utmost truth.

Saki then tells them that he's cursed to watch over them, and can't do anything else until his sins are attoned for, and none of the turtles know what to do about this entire thing, utterly stumped.

I'm not sure what happens in between them and the time he attempts to apologize after a few days of the turtles begrudgingly letting him stay but more so as a prisoner (at one point the man attempts to apologize but that only makes Leo snap and he runs a sword through him while saying, "You gave me these scars! Gave me this voice! This knee! You killed are father three times! The time for apologies is over!!! Do you understand?!?'' Will probably break down about it later with his brothers but yeah lmao) .

And of course once Karai finds out, she also immediately tries to attack, only to be completely baffled and betrayed when the turtles stop her, and even after they explain she's not only in denial, but filled with hatred, and vows to find a way to kill Saki before storming off.

I'm not sure what bonds there'd be. If any at all. Because this concept is SO odd to me and I could NEVER see the boys wanting ANYTHING to do with Saki in any form. But if anyone has any ideas they may want to add PLEASE say so I would like to hear them gfhfhdhd

Anyway. There's my super weird "Uncle(?) Saki" au. Do with this what you will fhdghxhddh

#god i feel so rotten writing all this out someone help me #the duality of hating this man SO much but also. the possibilities man. the possibilties....#tmnt #tmnt 2012 #teenage mutant ninja turtles #teenage mutant ninja turtles 2012 #ninja turtles #nick #nickelodeon #nickalodeon #tmnt shredder #2012 shredder #oroku saki #i hate that name so much why did I do this why someone help me #my stuff #uncle(?) saki au #luescris

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house-of-slayterr · 2 years

Text

Journalistic Science

You rolled over in your bed, groaning as your alarm went off for the third time this morning. You'd been up all night drinking, thanks to a certain someone. Your head was killing you, and your body felt sluggish. Twelve shots were certainly your maximum, no need to restest the hypothesis. You slapped the off button on your alarm clocks and slunk out of bed. As you walked passed the mirror, you stopped, you looked like shit.

You groaned, making your way over to the shower, seems like you'd be missing breakfast this morning. You didn't have time for both. After the shower, you there your hair up in a messy bun, you searched the cabinet for your contacts but were confused when you couldn't find any.

"Oh come on! Don't be out you irresponsible little shit! How did you forget to pick up more?"

You ran two your dresser, pulling out your spare glasses. They were thick, yellow-rimmed, hexegon-shaped frames. They made your eyes look huge with how strong your prescription was. But without them, you'd be useless. You pulled on your favourite sweater, intending to take it off when you got to work. You grabbed an energy drink on your way out and sped off to the Stark compound. As you made your way in, you realised you forgot your badge.

"Shit!" You swore.

A light chuckle was heard from behind you.

"Forget your badge again L/N?" Pepper's voice came from directly behind you.

You nearly jumped, caught off guard by her presence. You let out a heavy sigh, you knew her testing was playful, but you weren't in the mood today.

"Spare me the lecture please, it's been a long day." "It's only five am." She chuckled.

"Precisely."

"J.A.R.V.I.S, allow miss L/N Int the building without her badge from now on, just use the facial I.D. scanner." She instructed.

"Thank you!" you called out to her, as you rushed to the lab.

She never once looked up from her tablet, a bad habit she got into when in work mode. But she did raise a hand at you in acknowledgement. You made your way down the familiar path, keeping your head down You groaned loudly when you heard the sound of Black Sabbath blaring through the walls. You always wondered why Stark never turned on the soundproofing in the room, perhaps it was on purpose to annoy you.

"You're late." He said, also not looking up from his project.

"And you're the worst boss." You joked.

"It's not my fault, you can't handle your liquor. Company party requires your pretty face to show up."

You rolled your eyes at his comment. This man would sleep with anyone, and he practically had. You wondered if he even notices poor Pepper Potts was pining over him. She devoted herself fully to the company, as a way to distract herself from her boss. It was found upon to date at work, especially with that sort of power dynamic. But you routed for your friend anyway. She was probably the only person that talked to you besides Tony.

"Nice sweater by the way." He snickered.

You'd forgotten to take it off in your haste. It had a picture of a cat wearing heart-shaped sunglasses, drinking a latte on it. You quickly pulled it off over your head, accidentally knocking your glasses off in the process. You groaned when you heard a cark when they hit the hard lab floor. Tony paused what he was doing and came to your aid, picking up your glasses off the floor. You there your sweater on your chair and squinted at him.

"Which of the gods did I piss off today?" You asked jokingly.

He chuckled, gently grabbing your face and putting your glasses back on. It made you blush slightly, you were sure any person would in your position. It was odd how kind he was with you, you'd been how the billionaire treated other people.

"Take an extra long lunch today and go see the company optometrist, I'll have them fast-track a new pair of glasses for you. Or we could always just design you a pair that has an anti-gravity mechanism."

You couldn't tell if he was joking or not, but the lightheartedness was appreciated. He always knew how to make you less stressed. You pulled away, laughing awkwardly.

"Yeah, well make it the next big Stark invention, it will be so useful for the masses." You said sarcastically.

You quickly rushed over to your desk, resuming the project you were working on. Today you were probably focused on coding something that Mr Stark was working on as a side project. he was a genius, and he could just code something to code it for him, but he liked your work better. You rarely made errors, and always paid attention to details. It was one of the things he liked about you when he picked you over all the other scientists who applied for the job.

You majored in computer science, biochemistry, physics and aeronautical engineering. You were also finishing your linguistic and psychology degrees just for fun. You felt out of place if you weren't in a classroom, it made you feel incomplete. Tony always asked why you didn't just become a professor, you were more than qualified. But your response was always "And miss out on working in this dank lab with your awful music taste?" He nearly fired you the first time you said you didn't like ACDC, but Pepper convinced him he was overreacting. One of their songs came on your uber ride home that evening and you swore Tony had hacked the car's radio.

After about an hour into work, Tony scooted over to your desk, lurking behind you.

"Do you mind, boss man?" You jeered.

"Just checking in on my favourite girl."

"Weird, I didn't notice Pepper enter the lab."

You smiled when you noticed the man pause, his brain malfunctioning at the mention of the gorgeous woman. Sometimes you were jealous of her, she always had men pining over her, but never gave them the time of day. But you admired her commitment to being a powerful woman in America.

"How's the coding going?"

"What, wanna check my work?"

"Somebodies Fiesty today, remind me to make company time for naps.

You rolled my eyes. He went back over to whatever the fuck he was working on, on the other side of the room. He was always tinkering with something, but wouldn't tell me what it was. The swoosh of the lab doors sounded, but I didn't bother to look up, I knew who it was. Dr Banner, the man with 7 PHD's, god you wish you could be him. But your master's degrees weren't nearly as impressive. He didn't greet either of us, going straight to his desk and getting to work. You didn't realize you were staring up until Tony popped up by your desk again, startling me into spilling my energy drink.

You pushed back your chair, looking at the damage.

"What the fuck Tony?" You squealed.

This seemed to have caught Bruce's attention because the sound of his marker on the whiteboard stopped. Tony was doubled over, holding his stomach and laughing.

"Real Subtle L/N."

You glared at him.

"Tony, what did you do now?" Bruce said with a high.

You could hear the edge in his voice, he was stressed about something today, more so than usual. He made his way over, looking at the chaos that ensued. There was liquid on my computer, but it was Stark tech, so it wouldn't be hard to fix. But Your white t-shirt was completely soaked through, exposing your bra. You didn't notice Bruce's eyes on my chest, something you grew to expect from Tony.

"Shirt, now, I'm not putting my sweater back on." You glared at your boss.

Anyone else would probably be fired for talking to their higher-up like that, but Tony liked the sass. He hired Bruce, who you learned quickly was almost always sarcastic. Bruce was quick to take off his lab coat, wrapping it around your frame. The fabric completely covered you, being far bigger than you were.

"Thanks." You stuttered out.

He too sent a glare Tony's way, until the billionaire stopped laughing.

"Alright, alright, I'll be right back. You two kids don't have too much fun while I'm gone. Or use the lock on the door." He winked.

You scoffed. This cheeky Bastard.

"I'm sorry about him," you said, once Tony was out of earshot.

"You act like I expect anything more from him." Bruce brushed off, immediately going back to work. You sighed, I'd have to clean my keyboard and laptop or they would get sticky. But perhaps you deserved a short break. You bit your lip before my mouth spoke before my brain could catch up.

"Need any help with that?"

It was a shot in the dark, Dr Banner preferred to work alone most times. You've watched him overwork himself for months when he could have just asked for help.

"No, thank you."

"I'm not totally useless Dr Banner, I may not have 7 PHDs but you've been staring at that bored in frustration since you got in. Another set of eyes couldn't hurt."

Damn your mouth, always getting ahead of you. You didn't mean to come off as rude. Mostly because you never wanted to hurt him, but also because triggering the Hulk out, would be the worst end to your already shitty day. You heard him groan lowly, and were prepared to get reamed to hell in the back. Perhaps you deserved it.

"You wouldn't work her if you weren't incredibly smart Miss, L/N. You don't need a PHD to be a valued scientist."

His voice was softer than you were expecting, and it made me blush.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to put that on you, it wasn't fair of me to assume-"

He nodded his head toward the board, a silent invention for me to join him. You remained quiet for a moment, as you read over what he already had done. This didn't look like a project Mr Stark wanted to be done. But it wasn't rare for you to work on personal stuff when we weren't busy. You scrunched my brows together, he was working on a serum of some sort. You sighed, turning your attention to him.

"You're trying to get rid of him, aren't you?" You asked softly.

"I didn't invite you over here to pass judgment." You gently placed a hand on his shoulder.

"I'm not judging you, Dr Banner, I couldn't imagine how it must feel- I'm just concerned is all. I'm not sure you're doing this with the right intentions."

"And what would be the right intentions?"

"It's not my place to say, you invited me over here to help, it was inappropriate of me to give my opinion which you didn't ask for. And you can't figure out the formula, because you're using the wrong equation. You flipped the derivatives, simple mistake."

You grabbed the marker and erased the equation, fixing it.

"Thanks." He said.

"Did you sleep last night? It's not like you to make mistake like that?"

He sighed, shaking his head.

"Did you?"

"Touche... You do know you can always come to talk to me, about anything right? I'd like to think of you as a friend Dr Banner, and I always help my friends."

You made your way back over to my desk, leaving your proposition open. You didn't want to push, but his recent behaviour was worrying you. You heard the lab door open and close again, you expected to hear the grating voice of Tony, but there was just silence. The lab was now empty, perhaps you overstepped. You slammed your face down onto your desk, letting out a huff. Which is the brilliant moment Tony decided to reappear.

"I gave you the lab all to yourselves, and you didn't even utilise it." He joked.

"Not the time, Tony. I think I royally fucked that up, so if you want to gloat, get it over with. Not only am I the worst scientist on your team, but I'm also completely useless at human interaction."

He handed you a blouse he must have grabbed from Pepper's collection, she sometimes kept clothes at work, for when she spent the night. It was a bit more girly than you were used to. You remembered to take off your cracked glasses first this time and ripped off your ruined shit.

"Woah!" Tony said.

"Relax, you act like you've never seen tits, before, mine aren't much to look at"

You could have sworn you saw him squint at them, before turning his back. A gesture you were surprised, yet grateful Tony would afford you. You looked down at your outfit.

"I look like a mess."

"You look fine." He corrected.

Bruce came back into the room, but you avoided his gaze. You had placed his lab coat back on his desk, neatly folded. What you weren’t expecting was for him to B-line over to your station. He set down a cup.

"Two creams and a teaspoon of honey, right? Pepper said that's what you liked."

You smiled at the kind gesture, taking a sip of the coffee, and letting the warmth of it slide down your throat.

"It's perfect, thank you. What do I owe you?" You asked, reaching in your backpack for your wallet.

He held up his hand, "a coffee for an equation" was all he said, before going back to work.

Tony sent you a thumbs up when Bruce had his back turned, and you rolled your eyes. The rest of the day went out without a hitch thankfully. You met Pepper upstairs, and for once she didn't have her face in her work.

"Is that my shirt?"

You pinched the bridge of your nose.

"Of course, he didn't ask you! Tony made me spill energy drink all over myself, it was this, an ugly cat sweater, or walking around with my chest out. Which seems to be frowned upon when women do it."

"I didn't think your sweater was ugly, it was cute." She joked.

"You're worse than Tony! At least I can tell when he's lying to me."

She chuckled lgihtly.

"So, are you ready for the public briefing?"

Oh shit! That was tonight?

"You forgot, didn't you?"

"The world hates me! Why do I have to go?"

"Because you helped Tony invent the damn thing. You're not calling in sick. And you're not wearing my blouse."

She grabbed your hand, leading you to the elevators. You went up to the common room floor, and she took you to a huge walk-in closet, you looked around bewildered.

"Tony keeps extra clothes for the women he toats around in front of the press."

"Why am I not surprised? What do you see in him again?"

"I ask myself that every day."

You smiled at her. She helped you for nearly half an hour, pick out an outfit. You finally settled on a suit. You weren’t comfortable in dresses.

"How do I look?" You gave her a little spin.

"Take your hair down!"

"I dont see how that will help..." "Trust me!"

So you did as she asked, taking your hair down, and brushing it back with your hand.

"You look perfect. Nobody will be able to take their eyes off you."

"Thanks, but I thought the point was for people to listen to me."

"You're presenting to a room full of sharks my love, they don't care what a woman has to say, not saying it's right, but I won't send you in their bleeding."

"I hate men."

"Dont we all? Now go, you can't also be late, or they'll call you diva."

You were nervous, giving your speech. You hated talking in front of people. And Pepper was right, you could feel the men looking at you like you were some hunk of meat. It was disgusting. But you had Bruce and Tony by your side, which helped. Tony made jokes to the crowd to break the tension and helped you answer the journalist's rapid-fire questions. And Bruce stood with his hand on your back, rubbing soothing circles, which you were grateful for. He normally wasn't quick to physical contact, so it meant more to you than he would ever know.

As it came to a close, you were more than ready to leave. You hated wearing heels. You bid farewell to your coworkers, who were getting swamped by reporters. But you were stopped by your own reporter on the way out.

"I must say, darling, your speech was rousing, but I think the people would rather know where you got that pretty outfit from." He slurred out.

He was clearly drunk, you rolled your eyes, attempting to push past him. He, however, didn't like your response and grabbed your wrist. You paused, unsure of what to do, you didn't want to cause a scene and wanted to handle this like a rational adult. But you hated being touched, let alone without your consent, anyone would.

"Please, let go of me." You said softly.

You supposed maybe he didn't hear you, foolishly giving this man the benefit of the doubt.

"I said, let go!" You said louder.

This gained the attention of a few people close by. But none of them did anything but stare, except for one man.

"I think she asked you to let go, buddy, are you deaf, or just stupid?" The man asked.

He looked mildly familiar, but you couldn't pinpoint him from anywhere.

"Stay out of this Brock." The man spat.

Apparently, that was the wrong answer because this guy stepped up to him.

"I won't ask you again, to let the pretty lady go..."

You cursed yourself for blushing at a time like this, but he was rather attractive. And he was standing up for you, what's not to like? You tried to squirm away while he was distracted, but he tightened his grip, causing you to whimper. This set Mr Brock off. Before you could comprehend what was happening, a punch was thrown, and the man was being lifted into the air by his collar.

"If you ever put your hands on a woman like that again, I will cut them off!" He said, throwing the man down on the floor.

You stood bewildered, he didn't look that strong yet he picked up a man twice his size. A crowd was drawn now, and you grew self-conscious under everyone's gaze. You rubbed at your now sore wrist and kept your gaze on the floor, the man was quick to approach you and block your body from the countless journalist trying to take photos of what just happened.

"Are you alright Miss L/N?"

"You- you know my name?" You asked, surprised.

"I am at your Biochemistry demonstration, am I not?"

You blushed madly, forgetting that most of the people in the room were actually there for you. Technically for "Stark's Apprentice" You didn't expect anyone to learn your name, let alone remember it.

"I'm ok," You said quickly, "It doesnt hurt that bad."

"I swear I should eat him." You thought you heard him mumble.

"What was that?"

"I said I should have beat him, more... nobody deserves to be handled like you were. He'll be lucky if he still has a job by the morning after I'm done slandering him." He offered, trying to lighten the mood.

"You dont have to do that Mr-" "Call me Eddie, Eddie Brock."

Tony quickly caught onto the commotion, making his way through the crowd over to you. He forgot to announce himself before placing a hand on your back, and you nearly jumped out of your skin, Eddie was quick to react, but you were faster, cutting him off.

"Relax, it's just my boss."

"What happened over here?"

"This idiot thought he could put his hands on her and get away with it." Eddie pointed to the man who was still writhing on the ground with a broken nose.

Tony glared at the young reporter.

"My employer can speak for herself, pretty boy." He said, going into overprotective mode.

You said, annoyed at the macho energy that was crowding your space.

"If the both of you dont shut up, I'm punching each of you in the dick."

Eddie laughed, not realising you were being serious. Once he caught your gaze though, he raised his hand in surrender.

"I didn't mean to insinuate you could defend yourself, but I've been looking for a reason to punch that idiot for years now." He laughed.

"Want me to file a case against him?" Tony asked.

"Naw." You said.

You moved passed both men, crouching down to the ground in front of the whip who tried to hurt you. You lifted his chin, making him look at you.

"I believe in second chances, but you won't be getting a third. Go home, sobber up, and think about how much of a failure you are. I'm sure you're mothers very disappointed." You scolded.

Before he could respond, you took your other hand, and straightened his broken nose, he let out a scream. You slapped his cheek for emphasis, before going back to your boss and new protector.

"I can have Happy drive you home," Tony suggested.

"I don't think I want to go home right now." You sighed.

"Care for some dinner?" Eddie suggested.

You thought it over. You had a crush on Bruce, but you didn't think you'd ever be good enough for him. Maybe you could give the handsome reporter a chance. He was kind and hilarious, you felt bad using him as an emotional rebound. But it didn't seem like he was expecting anything out of this offer.

"I would love some dinner, Mr Brock." You smiled at him.

Tony gave you his signature look, and you once again found yourself rolling your eyes for what felt like the thousandth tie that day. Perhaps your day was looking up. You managed to get a date with Eddie Brock, what else could you do?

AN: Nobody asked, but I haven't written like anything marvel, so ignore the self-indulgence here. I just wanted to write this for myself. I'm busy at work this weekend, but I'll get to requests soon, I promise. Love you all!

#marvel #marvel x reader #mcu x reader #bruce banner #dr banner #the hulk #eddie brock #eddie brock x reader #venom #hulk x reader #bruce banner x reader

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chaosmultiverse · 5 months

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…And then there was a answer

"Intruder Alert: Rouge Hourglass"

"...Oh god I didn't go to a criminal for help, did I?" Stargazer asked himself, getting down and straightening himself up and walking to the door hesitantly, unsure if he should investigate or let them come to him.

Luckily he was spared from deciding by hearing behind him.

"You did, or well, will!" Her voice was cheerful and looking behind him he saw a short black woman, with long colorful locs, iridescent and shifting in colors, her eyes hidden behind large sunglasses with a old fashioned clock face on them both, right now they were reflecting the yellow of his eyes and of The Office.

"...I- Who are you even?"

"Oh right, I forgot you hadn't met me yet-"

"You've been using your powers in the space between universes! That's illegal!"

"...Duh, also right you haven't been on your character arc yet, you're still lawful neutral by D&D rules. Yes I am a criminal! And we will have a proper first meeting sooner rather than later & I will not like you and you will not like me but I swear we warm up to each other.

Either way! I am Entropy, and I will help you out with this… Shady but not out of your job description thing but I need you to promise me two things! Sound fair?"

She was rocking back and forth on her feet, smiling at him still. She already knew how this went, damn Hour Glasses.

"...What do you want?"

"For you to not tell past me that you already met me or anything I have told you and… You have to promise you won't call in the law when you meet me again, 'kay?" He blinked, or well it more happened in a short enough time that he couldn't see it even with his non-human biology, and she was in front of him with a hand out to make a deal.

"You'll contain the ripped universes to alternate timelines?"

"Yup, if you agree to my request."

They took her hand and shaked.

"Fine, for the sake of the Chaos Cluster."

"And your need to be the one observing it!"

There was a sound above and they both looked up to one of Odyssey's speakers.

"I am going to delete the recording of what has happened and been said over the last twenty minutes."

Stargazer looked rather embarrassed meanwhile Entropy just laughed to herself.

➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶

"It appears that the rip in universe-427, sub universe: The Office is starting to effect some adjacent universes and make rips in them to, how are you going to proceed?" Odyssey asked, putting up around the observation room glimpses of objects from The Office reaching other universes.

"I… That universe has been rather troublesome as far as rips in reality goes, I don't know if I can actually… Repair these rips…" Stargazer muttered to himself, hand on his mouth & chin like a inquisitive statue, right now he was sitting cross legged in the air so he could see all the projections.

"We could call in someone higher in command, they could bring in the big guns and get this repaired-"

"Absolutely not, if they start to think I've bitten off more than I can chew they'll take me away from here! This is my cluster of the multiverse, I'm not giving it up to anyone, no one would love-"

"Stargazer, but you can't chew this issue, we cannot not simply do nothing, while we have a no contact rule including for multiverse travelers this goes into multiverse infection easily, if the rip gets worse it could easily destroy several universes." Odyssey coldly reminded Stargazer, it was easy for him to forget from time to time that Odyssey was first a AI made by his employers and Odyssey second.

"...I know you love it, and want what's best for it, just remember just because you love something it doesn't mean you understand what it needs." Odyssey added, trying to be warmer.

Stargazer crossed his arms and sort of laid back until he was now upside down with his head poking up like how someone laying on a bed on their stomach would to look at the issues.

"...Idea, we isolate the versions of these universes that encountered the rip, split them off into their own universes, the "main" universes continue as normal and the "ripped" universes are contained in their own section so we can observe what follows. I mean we'll have to apply for Hourglass to come and help us with this which might be… An issue, they could report back whatever they want and I won't have recourse. It'd be my word vs theirs…"

Stargazer's words hung in the air…

#Welcome home ☆tsp plot☆#Stargazer ☆ic☆#Stargazer ☆main verse☆#Entropy ☆ic☆#Entropy ☆main verse☆#Ooc ☆self para☆#Odyssey ☆ic☆#Odyssey ☆main verse☆#This is like resvoir dogs #In writing style

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disco-elysium-via-polls · 6 months

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2. "That's why I want them. I think I might be low-fi socialist junk myself."

+1 Communism

SIILENG - "No, officer, you're a high-class policeman who accepts nothing less than the best! Lucky for you, I've got the best on sale!"

"You don't know what I am. I don't even know it myself." (Pause). "I want the speakers."

"Wait, what if I *do* deserve more than a low-fi socialist sound system…"

SIILENG - "Well, if you *want* them..." He pauses for a moment, calculating.

"But see, they are the pedestal for my sneakers. If I let go of the speakers, where will the sneakers go? I can't leave premium lifestyle sneakers on the *ground*..."

"If, on the other hand, you wanted to buy the *sneakers*, too, I could maybe throw in the speakers for a little extra -- 50 cents."

5. [Leave.]

BOX OF SUNGLASSES - There's a pile of cheap sunglasses in a small box, a variety of shapes and colours.

SIILENG - "You like sunglasses, officer? I've got the latest styles, right here!" The vendor takes a pair of sunglasses and sticks them under your nose.

Try the shades on.

Rummage through the box.

[Leave for now.]

BOX OF SUNGLASSES - Abort! These are hideous. What's more, they don't even fit your face. You can feel them pinching your nose and chafing against your brow.

SIILENG - "Damn, officer, you look like a mega-secret spy, very secret," the man nods eagerly. "They're practically made for you. I'll let you have them for... two reál and fifty cents!"

COMPOSURE [Medium: Success] - It's going to be very difficult for anyone to take you seriously with these things on your face.

KIM KITSURAGI - "No," the lieutenant gently removes the glasses from your face, setting you free again. "You're definitely not buying those."

"Don't tell me what to do, Kim. I like those sunglassses."

"You're right, I'm too sensible for those."

SIILENG - "Are you sure? But they look so good on you!" The street vendor frowns. "You should think this through, officer."

2. Rummage through the box.

BOX OF SUNGLASSES - These are all boring. Boring third-rate ho-hum sunglasses made of cheap Seraise plastic. The kind of plastic that melts in the sun.

DRAMA [Easy: Success] - Those UV-stickers are almost certainly just there for show. If anything, these lenses probably direct more UV light *into* your pupils -- a UV magnifier.

SIILENG - "These are all first-rate sunglasses!" the man declares. "Premium design, superb material, *very cool* UV-resistant! These will definitely keep your eyes safe *and* cool while doing your dangerous police work."

3. [Conceptualization - Formidable 13] Try again, maybe you can find *some* interesting sunglasses in the box.

I'm also hoping to fail this one.

CONCEPTUALIZATION [Formidable: Failure] - No luck. All you find is this... lime-coloured cellophane visor? Produced by a bargain sportswear brand called Amphibian, apparently. There's a malformed green frog on its bent cap.

SIILENG - "Oh, that visor is perfect for you, officer. It'll definitely keep the sun out of your eyes while you're shooting criminals." The street vendor makes a bang-bang sound. "And all for a mere six reál."

(Turn to the lieutenant). "Kim, are firefights something we should be prepared for?"

Put the visor back.

KIM KITSURAGI - "I hope not," he says, looking up from his browsing.

SIILENG - "You don't like it? Sure, square-jaw, no problem. Let's get you some real shades."

The Amphibian Sports Visor gives us +1 Perception, which is good, but not currently worth 6 reál.

6. [Leave for now.]

Hot air rises up from the sewer: sour, acidic, and strangely comforting.

#disco elysium #kim kitsuragi #siileng

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thatonefatgumsimp · 9 months

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so...I may or may not have gotten bored and made a whole incorrect quote tiktok feud between my au young millenial Enji and young gen z Hizashi...

Context: the responses are them stitching back and forth and replying to each other's tiktoks

Enji: "Anyone else hate how gen z is always going around claiming things as their own like the spoiled little brats they are? Oh we invented the cha cha slide, we invented twerking, we invented the cotton eyed joe- bitch no you didn't? We created all those things, those are ours."

Hizashi: "Anyone else hate how millennials are going around trying to steal a platform that isn't theirs cuz their mommy and daddy never gave them attention?"

Enji: "See you say that, but then all of you wear those stupid-ass sunglasses, mom jeans that make you look like a middle aged mother, and a middle part that emphasizes just how little you wash your hair."

Hizashi: "Says the one who went around wearing low rise skinny jeans, thongs, and those wack-ass side parts. Like bestie, get with the vibe. That's so last decade. Also do you not see how fluffy my hair is? I literally washed it yesterday. The audacity."

Enji: "Wig. No one cares. And at least I don't blame shit personality traits on my zodiac sign."

Hizashi: "Well at least I don't blame shit personality traits on my Hogwarts house and think drinking everyday is a personality trait. Literally go to double A, boomer. Low-key."

Enji: "At least we don't romanticize revolution, burning down the government, dying in protests, killing cops, and only shave once in a century, you literal fetus."

Hizashi: "I'm sorry, I don't remember last century…tell us, grandpa, what was the first world war like? Do you still have memorabilia from then like the original black and white gameboy and first edition Pokémon red?"

Enji: "See you think you're all that and a bag of chips, but you're not. Please finish puberty before you try to sit at the adult's table, kiddo."

Hizashi: "Literally what are you even saying? Speaking gibberish animal crossing lookin ass. "wig", "all that and a bag of chips" like what does that even mean, you fuckin dinosaur?"

Enji: "Your generation acts like you know nihilism, but you've literally only lived a decade and a half. Think before you continue speaking."

Hizashi: "Sorry, you're right. I'll just shut up until I've lived a century like you. Like damn you just like complaining, huh, Karen? I suggest you take several seats. And fix your hair while you're at it."

Enji: "Well you and your entire generation can suck it. You can't tell me what to wear or how to act. I've been rocking this side part since you had Kermit on your underwear."

Hizashi: sitting in a chair in his room with his real glasses on, midway down the bridge of his nose and a pen and notepad in hand "Mmhm…and does that make you feel better and more mature that you're going online emotionally dropkicking children? Does it give BDE? Cuz I'm gonna be honest, it's giving compensation for me…would you like to talk about it?"

Enji: "Ironic that you're acting like a therapist for me when your generation is literally the most depressed generation. mockingly Would you like a cookie?"

Hizashi: "Mmmmh no thanks, my parents taught me to never take candy from strangers…they also taught me how to have basic manners unlike you apparently."

Enji: "Well at least my generation isn't the bunch of dumbasses that's trying to cancel Eminem. That's cute that you even think you can do that. He was around before any of you were even born. What? Are you just mad that he was an actual lyricist unlike your modern mumble-rappers? In fact, I think you're the one that needs to take a chill pill. He was spitting bars before you could even talk."

Hizashi: "Mmh mmh, see- that's not even what we were talking about, don't go off topic Mr. "my generation has no idea how to use emojis correctly"."

Enji: "I can't even with you, child. You're testing my patience. We invented and used emojis first. Try again, Little Tyke. And honestly? Kindly stfu. No one asked you for your opinion anyways."

Hizashi: "Woahhhh calm down, Jamal, don't pull out the 9. And patience? Honey, what patience. It's giving chronically online. Go touch grass."

Enji: "At least I'm not an idiot who calls yoga pants flared leggings."

Hizashi: "Well at least we don't pay an ungodly amount for overpriced avocado toast or call our pets fur babies, idiot. Mic. Dropped. Get dunked on, boomer."

#shitposting #random shitpost #bnha #mha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #incorrect bnha quotes #incorrect mha quotes #mha shitpost #bnha shitpost #mha incorrect quotes #bnha incorrect quotes #incorrect quotes #idk man i got bored-

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jungwoniics · 2 years

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the boy and the party. — p. sunghoon

↦ pairing: park sunghoon / sunghoon x reader

↦ synopsis: You had been forced by your best friend to attend a party. But as soon as you arrive, she disappears into the crowd and you're left alone. But when a random boy joins you, you're not so lonely anymore.

↦ genre: fluff, crack/humour

↦ rating: pg13, sfw

↦ w/c: 1.5k+

↦ warnings: none

↦ a/n: hiii everyone! yay it’s sunghoon day today so yes this fic is in celebration of his birthday whoo! anyway, literally had no idea what to write about so :D feel free to lmk what you think! <3 ↦ event: happy sunghoon day! 🎉

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“Y/N, GET UP! HOW CAN YOU STILL BE ASLEEP RIGHT NOW? IT’S LITERALLY 5PM” Rina flips your mattress over, causing you to fall onto the floor with a loud thud. “What the hell?!” you shout back, rubbing your forehead which had come into contact with the floor. Rina smacks your arm in response. “Did you forget about the party!?”

You roll your eyes. You can’t believe a stupid party was the reason you got thrown out of bed. “I don't want to go. I have better things to do anyway,” you put the mattress back in its place and jump onto the bed again. You pull the covers up till your face is hidden. “Y/N! Get up! You promised you’d come with me!” Rina pulls the covers away from you again.

Being the stubborn person you are, you bring your legs close to your chest and clutch them to make yourself warm as you close your eyes once more. “Oh my god, Y/N, you’re killing me! I’ll tell your brother about the fight you had with his ex-girlfriend if you don’t get up right now!” Rina yells again before walking out of the room.

“Okay, okay, I’ll get ready. Don’t tell him Rina!” you yell back at Rina who was already out of the room. You take a quick shower and dress up before heading downstairs where Rina was waiting at the doorway. “Wow, you actually look presentable for once,” she comments. You smack her arm as you open the door, calling out to your brother to tell him that you were going out.

ii.

When Heeseung leads the two of you into his house, you begin to regret your decision on going. There were people everywhere. There were already people dancing. And at the corner, you find tiny groups of people just laughing and hanging around.

Gosh. One party this is going to be.

“Hey, anyone you looking for?” you turn around to face Rina only to find that she was no longer there. You look around panickedly. How could Rina have just left you there? You knew no one here except for Rina and Heeseung. As you make your way deeper into the house, you start getting pushed by the others as the whole room is booming with music and people begin getting on their feet to dance.

You quickly navigate your way out of the crowd; it was a terrible experience. Your face was almost shoved up someone’s butt when you were trying to duck from someone who threw a glass bottle. You run up the steps and peek into the first room to see-

You hastily close the door shut, wishing you could unsee what you just saw. You shake your head as you go over to the next room, very carefully opening the door, afraid of what may be happening in the room. But the room was empty. You close the door behind you and take a seat on the couch.

Unlike the previous room, this merely had a couch and TV with a small refrigerator at the corner of the room. There were also multiple bean bags around the room. You figured it was probably some room just to hang out. You slump on the couch, wondering what you were going to do.

You close her eyes, hoping to be able to have a moment to think. But of course, your hopes are crushed when the door swings open and closes again. You sigh under your breath as you open your eyes again. Before your eyes, you saw a boy. He was tall, wearing a normal black t-shirt with jeans, and he had sunglasses on for some reason. The left side of his denim jacket falls off his shoulder slightly as he just stands there.

“I didn't know this room came with a pretty girl,” he smirks as he takes a seat next to you on the couch. You knew you were blushing uncontrollably because the boy’s smirk widens when he looks at you. You look everywhere but at the boy, embarrassed by your reaction.

“So, what are you doing here all alone?” the boy asks. “Uh- I- I just- I’m not a fan of big crowds,” you manage to say but stammer terribly. “That's how parties are, doll.”

You raise an eyebrow at what the boy called you. “Doll? Really, sunglasses?” Another smirk forms on the boy’s face. “Oh we’re doing nicknames now, huh?” “Yes, who wears sunglasses indoors?” you shrug.

“So what’s your name?” you ask after a brief moment of silence. “I thought you already decided that Sunglasses was my name,” the boy smirks. You just roll your eyes as you introduce yourself, “I’m Y/N.” “Ah the pretty girl has a pretty name too,” he says again, the smirk still on his face.

A visible redness forms on your cheeks as you try to cover it up by looking away. “I'm Sunghoon,” the boy says, putting his hand out towards you, his smirk turning into a genuine smile. You take his hand and shake it. “Wow, small hand you got there, doll.”

the two of you then fall silent, sitting quietly next to each other and thinking about how they were glad not to be spending time alone at the party. You eventually fall asleep and your head droops and rests on Sunghoon’s shoulder.

He flinches a little at the sudden contact, causing you to unconsciously half-open your eyes and lift your head slightly. Sunghoon quickly regains his composure as he slowly brings your head back to rest on his shoulder, bringing his arm over to rest on your shoulders.

He just watches you, observing how your feet are brought up onto the couch, your hands clutching them as if to fight the cold, your little pout and your hand twitching a little from time to time, and your slow and steady breathing. He watches you till he falls asleep too, his head resting on yours gently.

iii.

You open your eyes slowly, stretching lazily. Looking around, you realise that you’re still at the party. Feeling someone’s head drop onto your shoulder, you turn to see Sunghoon’s face. “Oh my god,” you immediately move away from Sunghoon in shock, causing his head to drop down abruptly. He immediately wakes up from his slumber and anger fills his eyes but immediately softens when he notices you beside him.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to do that,” you immediately explain, afraid that he would shout at you. Sunghoon just smiles, “It’s alright, doll. No harm done.” “How long have we been asleep?” you mutter under your breath as you rub your head like it was all a dream.

Sunghoon looks up at the clock in the room, “About 2 hours.” “What?!” you shout unintentionally, making Sunghoon wince due to the sudden change in volume. “I’m sorry. I should probably get home. It was nice meeting you, Sunghoon.”

“You too, doll. We’re practically married now,” Sunghoon says with a grin. You blush for what must have been the hundredth time, quickly standing up and heading for the door. “Hey, I’ll drive you home. It’s getting late. Wouldn’t want a pretty girl like you getting kidnapped,” Sunghoon gets up and opens the door for you, gesturing for you to step out first.

Sunghoon brings you out of the house and to a car parked by the driveway. “Wow, nice car,” you say as the two of you walk closer to it. “Thanks. Are you interested in cars?” Sunghoon assumes. “Oh no, I don’t care about them at all,” you say matter-of-factly. A smirk forms on Sunghoon’s face as he laughs a little.

iv.

As the car passes through the street, you begin looking around for your house. “Uh, my house is around the corner. Right in front there,” you point at your house. Sunghoon looks over to where you are pointing. His eyes light up, “Really? I live there.” He points to the house opposite yours.

“Oh, so you’re the new people who moved in!” you suddenly exclaim in realisation. Sunghoon laughs as he pulls over in front of your house. As you get out of the car, Sunghoon gets out too.

“I can walk to my house on my own, Sunghoon. I’m not going to get kidnapped or anything,” you grin, looking back at Sunghoon as you walk up the porch. “I know. But it’s just what a gentleman does,” Sunghoon grins back as he falls in next to you. You laugh silently as you stop at the front door.

“Well, I guess this is goodbye,” Sunghoon shrugs, a wide smile on his face. You nod, “Thanks for hanging around with me at the party. I would've died of boredom.” Sunghoon chuckles, “Right.”

“Anyways, I’ll see you around, doll,” Sunghoon smirks as he turns around to return to his car. You give one final wave before Sunghoon drives into the garage opposite your house.

Maybe that party wasn’t too bad.

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