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#high thoughts of a broken soul
loveroftime · 4 months
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Dude Sleep Tokens lyrics are just insane
I mean this partial verse: "And I don't know what's got its teeth in me, but I'm about to bite back in anger.No amount of self-sought fury will bring back the glory of innocence."
^ that partial verse makes me cry everytime for some personal ass reasons but still
But the line: "We were tangled up like branches in a flood."
^ that line makes me think of a broken romance for real, a lost string of two connected fates
I MEAN COME ON
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ridingthatd · 4 months
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◕◔ RYOMEN TWINS II
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◔◕ itadorixfem!reader, sukunaxfem!reader, nsfw, heavy smut, twins breeding you, possessive, kinky asf part 2
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sukuna ryomen. sukuna was never interested in anything other then aiming to evolve himself, becoming even stronger and ruling with immense power.
after all sukuna is the strongest sorcerer of a thousand years, and is known as "the King of Curses".
sukuna is selfish, cold-hearted, immoral, and exceptionally sadistic. while his brother itadori found humans amusing , sukuna thought the slaughter of women and children are just like maggots crawling around.
he never understood why his brother was so obsessed with humans souls- their emotions, emotions both him and his brother never felt.
fear. sadness. anger. jealousy. love- they were think they never got the taste of. sukuna never understood why would a man beg on his knees- broken knees to spare his so called wifes life, why would a man care about another humans life- as less as a pathetic woman's life more than his own.
he never understood that, until he met his little human- right you were his- theirs, he would end a whole nation if even one of their people dare to touch a single stand of your long delicate hair. and he knows his brother felt the same.
sukuna wanted to take you- have you, knot you with his seeds the moment he laid his dark eyes on you, his cock was hard-ragging demanding to fill your little pussy with his warm seeds, demanding to break your little pussy- tear it open with his two cocks.
his whole body filled with heat, as he stare at you bowing infornt of him- him and his brother, he was aware that his body was larger then any average human. but you- you were even smaller then an average human, he could take you right here, claim you right here and you wouldn't be able to do anything about it, just cry out as his fat cock stretch both of your holes out.
at first it would be painful for your pretty little pussy to take his fat cock- you would beg him to stop, choking on your sobs but as soon as he hits the sweet spot in your womb you would start drolling, brain high, as you beg him for more- beg him to tear your little ass with his other cock.
sukuna smirks at his thoughts, he couldn't help the dark deep laugh he let's out as he glance at his brother- his brother that was clearly thinking the same thing as him, as he stare at their little loyal maid.
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sukuna knew you were someone who will serve him and worship him, live under his shadow. someone who would be playful with him and be bratty on purpose, seducing him so innocently. he wasn't ever interested in sexual intercourse, more like no one caught his attention enough to have him as much as glance at them.
he lost count on how many woman's head he had beheaded off because of their pathetic in tempt to seduce him- but here you are innocently sitting on his lap, dress drenched with his cursed bath water, revealing your hard nipples as you gently scrub on his skin not aware of his hard cocks that were ready to devour you.
he chuckled to himself, you were so naive that you thought his filthy brother was a gentleman- an Innocent man, but in reality itaodori was a filthy as much as he was , a man who would steal your cute little panties while he claimed that he wanted to "help" you with the laundries, a man who would beat his cock raw as he sniff on your panties, he would go as far as taking your used ones just to stroke his cock with it.
sukuna wasn't any better, he sighs to himself as he lean in to sniff your scent, he was obsessed with how soft your body was in his big arms, his body always relaxed like he's in cloud nine as soon as your rosy scent hit his nose, he growls pushing his face harder into your plumpy breast, brushing his nose softly on your exposed cleavage.
as the loyal submissive human you are, you don't deny him your body, you simply continue your work on him- your hands massaging his hard sculp, running your delicate fingers through his pink locks, making him groan into you- you can feel the vibration through your body.
oh how much he loved this.
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you wake up heat- heat running through your whole body, through your veins, it was like you were on fire- fire of pleasure, it stings so bad yet so good, it's like your body was boiling under hot water, the heat source comes directly from your cunt.
you felt something huge, something wet, something warm, something rough- stroking your pussy. once. twice. third-
you lost count, to focused on the sensation of your pussy burning, it was so so warm, so so wet you couldn't help but arch your hips into it, wanting more, whining as you feel it leave burning trail from your pussy to your ass, stroking- no licking at your hole.
you finally snap your eyes open pulling yourself up, realization hit you, you weren't laying on the bed sheets you were laying on something hard, you look down just to make contact with dark eyes, pupils thin, filled with lust- eyes who belong to non other then your master sukuna.
your body slumps back into sukunas chest again, whimpering as you feel two long-thick fingers shoved up your tight ass hole, tearing through you, you felt a warm chest being pressed behind your back- you're being sandwiched between two hard, muscles ripped chests.
a warm tongue peak out, licking the shell of your ear, making you squirm on the wet thing under you- the wet thing was non other then sukunas mouth stomach.
"our baby woke up" your master itadori mutter out, his hot breath behind your ear, his nose softly brushing your neck, as he leaves wet-sloppy kisses inside your ear, this way the only thing you can hear was the wet noises his mouth made.
you feel sukunas stomach-tongue circling your ass before going back to your pussy shoving it completely inside your sore hole making you arch your back against itadori chest, screaming as the long wet tongue entered your walls.
"no- ngh no- no to much" you choke out a sob as you feel sukunas tongue hit your womb circling around your sensitive spot that drives you crazy, it was to slippery, to wet, you felt to stuffed with his huge stomach-tongue, thrusting so fast inside your pussy.
itadori was still licking on your ear- it was soaking wet-sloppy soaking with his spit, everything was to much, you couldn't hear anything other then the wet sounds of itadoris tongue, and the sloppy sounds of sukunas tongue entering you again and again and again.
sukunas two lower hands trail to your hips, kneading them in his large hands before he hashly lift you up and slam you down his tongue making you cry out, "ah- ah- master- please no more" you beg for mercy.
"shh i know, i know let master take care of the sweet pussy of yours" he purrs out, as he watches the way your juice coat his tongue dripping down his stomach- you tasted like honey and he couldn't get enough, his tongue selfishly lapping on every single corner inside your pussy.
"fuck she's gushing her juice all over you" itadori hot breath hits your wet ear as he darkly speaks out, causing you to finally lose it at the sensation as he plugs your ass with his finger shoving them deep inside.
you shake, body giving up as you land on sukuna your face hovering over his, pushing your pussy- your ass more into them, as soon as you see the way sukuna was staring at you so hungrily as he slams your pussy into his tongue and his brothers finger.
you squirt- gushing out clear liquid, crying out as you feel your whole body shake, fingers holding into your master sukuna for dear life. itadoris finger still inside of you, shoved deep but making no movement while sukuna crazily continue rocking your pussy into him.
"yes! yes! fucking give it to me! all of it" he growls out, two of his upper hands grab your hair and lean it to his face just to suck on your lips, while he continue his brutal movement on your sensitive pussy.
another orgasm rips out of you, you feel like you could pass out, your screams were muffled out by sukunas mouth as he sucks, leaving them red.
"god fucking girl" itadori stoke your back leaving kisses on your spine while sukuna finally slow his movement, ripping his mouth away from yours, just to lick the tears that left your eyes.
sukuna flip you over- so he was on top of you, slowly pulling his tongue out of your soaked pussy, eyes darken as he looks at the way it was so swollen, it was barely recognizable, it was wide open leaking your clear cum and his spit out, he purrs satisfied at the sight.
itadori doesn't know why did he agree on letting his brother have you, but looking at you right now he doesn't regret his decision one bit. shoving his finger inside your beat up cunt, making you whine before he shove it inside his mouth groaning at the filthy taste.
sukuna leans over to you pressing his forehead into yours, you stif as you feel a rock hard warm thing brush against your ass, you open your eyes glancing at sukuna- your eyes widen as you see- not one but two of his fat cocks lining against your hole.
"you're going to take it like a good girl for master" he growls out before he completely tear through your tight ass, ripping you apart. two of his hand-mouth that was holding your hips down, lick up your waist leaving a wet trail before landing on your nipples, trapping them in his mouth, suckling on the hard bud.
you were sure the bed was going to break, from how hard sukuna was thrusting into your ass, your voice was caught in your throat, eyes crossed, mouth hanging open causing spit to leave it.
"we can't leave your sweet mouth hanging empty like that" itadori coo at you as he swipe your drool with his finger before sucking it into his mouth, you glace at his hard cock that he was stroking precum leaking out of his reddish head, you moan out as you feel sukuna rock into you faster, causing your body to crash into itadoris from the force.
you feel his cock at your lips, and you immediately open your mouth wider welcoming him, lazily licking the head before slurping it into your mouth, focusing on it, coating it with your spit.
itadoris thighs shake, the way your tongue licked up his sensitive clit had him close to cumming undone, just as close as sukuna was.
"fill down her throat, I'm going to fucking fill this ass of hers" sukuna groan out as he slaps your ass with his other two hands, gripping your cheeks and spreading them wide to take a good look at how your tight ass was hungrily taking his fat cock.
your moan vibrate into itadoris huge cock and that has him spilling his hot cum down your throat with a loud moan, his brother soon follow him, filling your ass with every single last drop.
"fucking." thrust.
"take." thrust.
"it." thrust.
"all." thrust.
your mind was blank, every single hole of yours was filled with their cum- leaking with their cum, your body was twitching.
sukuna lean in to kiss your clit, while itadori kiss your nose. maybe after all they did have something in common.
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₊˚ʚ ᗢ₊˚✧ end ₊˚ʚ ᗢ₊˚✧ ゚
: ̗̀➛ part 1 is 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞
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sukunasteeth · 1 month
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Marks
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Sukuna doesn't understand the hold you have on him.
He's never particularly been a people person. In fact, people annoyed him. This has held true ever since he was a child with his twin brother, Yuji. That is, until Yuji brought you home one fateful day in middle school, claiming to have met a new friend. 
You, with your sweet little smile, and your boundlessly generous heart. You with your giggle that chimes through his darkened soul like a golden bell. With the innocent rosy lips that he'd dreamed of having his first kiss with until high school, when it finally came to fruition. You had been irrevocably his ever since then, and it had been almost seven years.
So why does it still feel like you're the one with all the power here?
Why does it feel like you could create a monster out of him if you truly wanted to? Why does it feel like he's constantly at your beck and call? Why are you the one person on this green earth that reduces him to the feeling of an emotion as pathetic as helplessness?
"'Kuna...hurts..."
He'll admit, he takes it out on you.
Like now, when you're lying naked beneath him (his favorite spot to have you in) and begging him to take it easy on you. He's got you covered in sweat, exerting you to your ultimate limit. He loved to see you train until failure, after all. Adored the way your legs quivered when he relentlessly made you keep riding him, despite your exhaustion. Cooed at the way you begged him to be gentle, even though he knows you prefer it rough. You were quick to submit when he had you behind closed doors, despite how independent you appeared outside of them. Sukuna knew you better. Knew how much you loved following his direction. Receiving his praise.
You were lucky you were such a good girl.
Sukuna was torturing you now already, and you hadn't even disobeyed him. He can't imagine what he would do if you were unruly. Actually, he can. And the thought has him salivating even more as he sucks relentlessly at the nape of your neck. You're covered in marks from his teeth or the raw scrape of his tongue. Your throat has been tormented by his worship to the extent that he's even broken skin in the spots where he can feel your pulse beneath his lips.
Even Sukuna has to admit that you didn't deserve this abuse. You hadn't done a thing out of line, besides selfishly tearing the heart out of his chest for good. It was yours now.
The thought makes him growl against you.
God, you weren't even trying.
Your victory over him was so effortless.
It pissed him off.
He doesn't realize that he's bitten you particularly hard until you're suddenly recoiling away, burrowing yourself into his pillows with a small yelp. Your hand has sprung up to press your palm over Sukuna's mouth in some weak attempt at getting him to stop. Your other hand holds your throat as you purse your lips at him, which have also seen a good amount of Sukuna's biting that day.
You looked good in his teeth marks, what can he say?
"Are you mad or something?" You're blinking up at him like a confused little deer. Sukuna can't help that it makes him hungry. You were a perfect prey to him and he would be chasing you to the end of this lifetime. He could tell solely in the way that your stupid little nickname for him makes his heartstrings snap.
He takes a frustrated breath through his nose over your hand, nipping at your fingers over his mouth like a muzzled dog. Before you can pull them away, he's grasping your wrist tightly, his unforgiving grip a warning in itself. Easily, he pins it to the side of your head, rendering you halfway useless.
"Don't interrupt." He murmurs, his gaze burning into yours.
A helpless sob escapes you, but otherwise you stop trying to squirm away from him. You allow the onslaught to continue without a peep, bracing yourself each and every time a new hickey is being bruised into your skin. He doesn't offer you any words in terms of praise, but his grip on your wrist eventually loosens a bit. He never fully lets you go, though.
While he appreciates your cooperation, you eventually go almost too quiet and Sukuna thinks for a moment that maybe he's pushed you too far. He pulls away from your neck to look at you, finding your pink little face screwed up in an intense mixture of pleasure and agony. He feels a content smile spread across his face but it's cut short when his eyes hone in on your lips, which you're currently biting hard enough to draw blood from.
His free hand reaches up and grasps your chin, pressing his thumb below your bottom lip and forcing you to relinquish it. You blink slowly, your logical brain having exhausted itself up until this point. You easily let him pry your teeth apart, panting in his grasp. 
"Mouth. Open." He commands.
You squirm in your overwhelming frustration, whining. "It hurts, 'Kuna!"
Sukuna hums in a mock sympathy, watching you suffer with a satisfied grin. You would have these marks for weeks. There were so many now, some more intense than others, and he wasn't even close to being done with you.
"You're being cruel." You accuse, watching your own hardship twinkle back at you in the reflection of his eyes. Your pout is purple and bruised from your attempts to keep quiet. Sukuna leans in closer and presses the sweetest kiss to your lips, as soft as the brush of a feather.
What was cruel was the fact that you had broken down everything Sukuna had ever known about himself. His strength was putty at your feet. His hatred for the world was a joke in your presence. His pride, a mere memory at the touch of your fingertips against his soul.
"You think this is cruel?" He whispers, mocking you. His voice is the taunt of a devilish trickster. "I think I've been going too easy on you. Allow me to rectify that."
There really is no curse more cruel than love.
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tomriddleslove · 3 months
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I’m here.
✩Mattheo Riddle x Reader
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Summary: The one where Mattheo is spiralling and he needs a way out. He doesn’t expect to find it right in front of him. Alternatively: He doesn’t realise he is loved, by you.
A/N: Riddles 🤝 Internal Monologues. I’ve postponed a smut to write this because my heart belongs to angst. REQUESTS ARE OPEN 😻
Warning: Mentions of Abuse, Child abuse, Substance Abuse, Unhealthy Family environments, Depression. This is quite a heavy read.
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Mattheo liked to think of himself as an independent person. It wasn't of his own volition, of course. He didn't exactly have the most supportive home environment. From the day he turned up to Hogwarts after the summer holidays, with scuff marks on his shoes, ragged clothing, hunger gnawing at his insides like a ravenous beast and a bruise spattering the left side of his face, he learnt that the world would not show mercy on him. No, Mattheo had to do it on his own.
He did indeed feel grateful for his friends, who didn't need to utter a word in their support. It wasn't hums of sympathy or pitying looks. It was them brushing off his back when he fell, it was saving the work for him when he had rough evenings, it was pouring him a coffee when he sat down for breakfast without saying a word. Their friendship was not reflected in their words, no, for words were futile. It was in their actions. And Mattheo would be eternally grateful for them.
But even then, it was he who was surrounded by so many, who felt the most alone.
He couldn't ever speak of his issues, he didn't think he ever could. His friends loved him, but not in the way unconditional love came. It need not be romantic, no, Mattheo was not a fool. He didn't care for that when he could barely get himself together. But his deepest secret was not his family's past, nor was it the hidden bruises under his uniform.
Rather, it was that Mattheo simply, had the most terrible, incredibly human need, for love.
For the sort of love that would let you look at the most broken down, raw parts of a person, and still speak of them with reverence.
It tears at your skin. It digs its claws into your feeble skin, and it pulls, It tugs, and it screams. It bares its teeth, it etches its name into your soul. It feeds on you, it consumes you, it hurts you. It bleeds in front of you.
It bleeds, yet it does not cower under the weight of its own vulnerability, because it knows you love it. You lean down, and you cradle it as though it was the most delicate thing on earth. It shrieks in your arms, it continues clawing at you.
You hold it. You are not afraid.
It bleeds, and it makes you bleed with it.
It’s ok.
You'll clean it. You are not afraid.
It was, in its purest form, an ugly thing. Ugly, yet so undeniably beautiful. His heart could only ache, and clench at the thought of such an unconditional love. The idea that someone could see him for him, see Mattheo for Mattheo and not for his father, or for his friends, or for his loud, raucous persona that he put on, or his unhealthy habits.
But how could someone see Mattheo for himself, when he himself didn't know who he was?
He wondered what the rest of his life held for him, often. Sprawled out on his bed, a near-empty bottle of Odgens’ fire whiskey loosely clutched in his hands. His hands are cold; they never warmed.
He always had this feeling in his throat. A sort of suffocating weight, a pain that restricted him. It made it hard to swallow, and even harder to speak.
People would think he'd be out partying. Maybe getting with a girl. With his friends.
It's not that he didn't do that. He did. But it got to a point where the face of one girl blurred into another, he couldn't tell his mornings from evenings. Floating on a high that would sink into an undistinguishable low, one and the same.
He never slept. Whilst they didn't outwardly question it, his friends would jibe and jeer at him, assuming the bags under his eyes were due to his late-night rendezvous with another girl.
Would they look at him differently if they knew it came from nightmares?
He couldn't sleep, because every time he closes his eyes the depths of his mind torment him with images from his past.
His father’s hand comes down, cruel and unforgiving. The bruises mar his skin, but it became the norm. The purples and greens became akin to home more than anything else he had.
In his dreams, his legs do not reach as far as they do now. His calloused hands are smooth once more, and his eyes are wide and honest.
He is young once more, and it does not bring him ease.
He seeks out his mother, he yearns for comfort. She does not give it to him. He is met with the harsh sound of a slap resounding, and his cheek starts hurting. He's confused, and then-
Oh.
Right.
His eyes close, and they open again. He is now looking in the mirror, and he is back to the way he is now. He is standing there, and he cannot tell why he is. He looks the same, yet somehow unrecognisable. Mattheo knows himself well, but right now he feels as though there is a stranger in front of him. That can't be him, he thinks, but he has the same faded scar on his right eyebrow, and his jaw is clenched in the same way. His nose is slightly crooked from when he tried to mend his broken nose at the age of 8.
He meets his eyes in the mirror, and they stare back at him. There isn't that familiar gleam of exhaustion. There isn’t sadness, yet he isn't relieved to see it. He looks in the mirror, and he sees himself. He sees his father reflected in him.
He is watching, and a child approaches him. He is young, as Mattheo was. He barely manages to walk over without stumbling. He looks up at Mattheo - the one in the mirror. Mattheo looks down, but he does not see the kid next to him. He stares back at Mattheo in the mirror, and his reflection is looking down at the child. His stomach starts to hurt. His insides churn, and the reflection raises a hand. The child looks up at him, the same way Mattheo looked up at his mother. The hand comes down, and the harsh sound of a slap resounds throughout the room. The child cries. Mattheo's cheek hurts.
He wakes.
Gasping, sweat clinging to his forehead. His body is freezing, and his mind is reeling. His heart is pounding frantically, and he throws the blanket off him, rubbing a hand over his face as he groans.
He couldn't sleep, He was terrified of trying to do so. His eyes flicker over to the clock on his wall.
2:00 am.
Every time he shuts his eyes, he sees the child looking up at his reflection in the mirror. He sees his reflection raising its hand. In the silence, he hears the sound of the slap, he hears the cries of the child. It mingles with his own, he cannot not tell whose is whose.
He gets up, slipping his hoodie on. His movements are groggy because even if his mind couldn't sleep, his body still needed it.
Then again, one more night of resorting to drinking himself to sleep and he wouldn't be sure if he would wake again. His feet lead him to your room before his mind registers it. He doesn't know why he's standing outside your door, but you were his friend. Perhaps, a closer friend than the rest of them. He knew you'd be up, and he needed to not be alone right now.
Mattheo was a very independent person most of the time, but now was not one of those times.
That terrible, incredibly human need comes back again.
His hand rests on the doorknob, the cool metal still warmer than his own skin. He hesitates, but he pushes the door open.
Your door was always open for him.
As he expected, you were awake. Stretched out on your bed, propped up on a few cushions as you read a book. Your eyes flicker up as you look over at Mattheo, the confusion on your face very quickly fading as you see the state he's in.
You do not say anything, and he is grateful. You put your book to the side. You do not slide over to the side and offer Mattheo a spot next to you like you always do. You instead, continue looking over at him. Instead, you open your arms. You do not say anything, and you beckon him over.
He does not move immediately. He gazes at you for a second and once again, his feet move, and he gravitates towards you before his mind can even compute what he’s doing. The mattress squeaks slightly under your combined weight, as he comes over. He lowers down onto you, his head resting on your chest as he wraps his arms around your midsection. You cradle him as though he was the most delicate thing on earth. His cold skin meets yours, and its intransigence wavers.
He warms, and it is the most beautiful feeling.
He clings to you, as though trying to merge his existence with yours, afraid you'll slip away.
You hold him.
“I'm here,” You whisper.
It doesn't take long after that.
His head is hidden in your chest. Your fingers card through his brown curls.
You hold him.
He weeps.
You hold him.
You do not let go. He cries, and he cries till his throat is dry, and your shirt is soaked. He cries, and not once does your hold on him waver.
You are not disgusted by him. You do not look at him differently. It is amidst those tears that he comes to the realisation that he did not have to search very far. He is not just seeking comfort; he's holding onto the love and acceptance he's always craved. The raw, unfiltered emotion takes him by surprise, and he lets it wash over him. He did not cower under his own vulnerability any more, no, for his vulnerability is both liberating and overwhelming.
His sobs gradually subside, and your hold only loosens slightly when his body no longer shakes with the weight of his emotions. The feeling in his throat is gone.
He doesn't look up at you, but it's okay. You still look at him the same way. Your lips press a tender kiss against his messy hair lightly. His arms wrap around you tighter. You both remain silent. You don’t need to speak the words, because Mattheo knows.
Everything would be okay, if only for tonight.
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historiaxvanserra · 4 months
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Whatever Our Souls Are Made Of
Pairing: SingleDad!Rhys x Reader
Summary: After his mate and the mother of his son abandons them, The High Lord and Nyx are left alone and wanting.
Word Count: 3.9k
Warnings: allusions to sexual assault, allusions to depression, abandonment, broken homes (y'know keeping it light, in all seriousness this is not all angst it's quite sweet actually).
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The sky is painted in hues of lavender and mauve and the flowering ivory clouds shade Velaris in a perpetual state of dusk. The silvery light of the waxing moon seems to cast you in a gentle opal light as you approach the opulent manor. The High Lord’s townhouse is nestled in the heart of the city of starlight and wreathed in the colors of twilight; a slate facade that looks as though it is crowned in green, climbing ivy and night-blooming jasmine frame the large bay windows on the ground floor. From here you can see the large stained-glass window on the top floor, light refracts and it casts a myriad of dancing light onto the stone below-- dappled pinks and roses that fracture and give way to amethyst and indigo.
You spare a look to your aged companion as she breaches the threshold of the High Lord’s residence and, on unsteady feet, approaches the ornate wooden door and knocks thrice. 
You remain for a moment a solitary figure at the entryway of the property, contemplating the series of events that led you here. Mother above, you chastise yourself. The thought occurs to you then, that perhaps you had made a mistake in coming here; that you should have given yourself more time, that you should have remained in the quiet solitude of the library where the world seems like a bitter memory. 
“Come, girl.” Madja’s voice is tired and impatient as she beckons you closer with the wave of a crooked finger. “Don’t just stand there.” 
You swallow thickly, bowing your head in obedience and you notice how her eyes soften as you approach the door tentatively.
“Nervous?” the old woman asks, you feel her eyes on you-- examining and critical.
“A little,” You admit, eyes downcast as you loose a shaky breath, “I haven’t left the library besides for training in quite some time.”
You stare down at the sleeves of your faded pewter robes as they billow in the evening breeze; the silver embroidery around the cuffs has begun to fray and the layers of fabric gather about your waist, the pleats have been poorly ironed and the heavy fabric falls over the curve of your hip haphazardly and pools to the floor in a swathe of heavy cotton. Shame pools in your stomach at the sight of your slippers as they peek out from the skirts of your robe. 
It’s about time you asked Clotho for a new set of robes you think. 
“You’ve met him before, no?” Madja’s voice breaks the tenuous peace you have found in those moments. You look up at her and a deep set frown graces her weathered face, “when you first came to Velaris?”
The visions fall on you like night; the Moonstone Palace saturated in onyx and jade, the reflections of your face in the marble of the throne room floor, the sentries as they dragged you before the High Council. The sounds of your screams and a sea of rubies and pearls as the bodice of your dress is torn away from your heaving chest-- all that red. Terrible and red. 
Hewn City had always been cruel to you. You, a useless daughter to an ambitious man. The dreams are less vivid now but the sound of footsteps on marble still haunts you. 
“Yes, it was him who brought me to Velaris-- after-afterwards,” You acquiesce to her questioning, eyes set on the light beyond the frosted glass panes of the onyx doorway, “though I doubt he remembers.”
Your avenging angel.
Madja looks at you carefully, taking account of you before she nods to you in silent acknowledgement. 
The door to the High Lords townhouse opens with a flourish to reveal Morrigan. She’s more beautiful than you remember, radiant even as the dark shadows of sleep cling to her. Her golden hair hangs in loose waves over the delicate curve of her shoulder and though the deep umber of her eyes meets yours in a warm inviting stare as she utters your name. 
She knows your name. 
“Come on in from the cold.” she beckons you with the curve of a slender hand. You smile politely as you cross the threshold of the house. The wards fall away as you pass through into the foyer and the smell of mandarin and night blooming jasmine flood your senses. 
The foyer to the townhouse is truly beautiful; a testament to the fine artistry and craftsmanship that seemed to define Velaris’ art district. The walls are paneled wood, painted in a shade of twilight that can only be found here, in The Night Court, and the burgundy carpet so rich in color that it reminds you of a blood moon, the oil paintings that hang on the walls seem to exude an air of majesty unlike anything you’ve ever seen. 
In this room night reigns triumphant and you behold it all with a sense of wonder and awe. A careful deference to the love and care contained between these walls. It is a home that has been truly cherished by the people that live here. 
“Did Madja tell you why you had been summoned here?” Morrigan’s voice is soft and sweet and the feeling of her hand on your robed arm pulls you from your thoughts. 
“Sorry - I - uh” I stutter, glancing between her hand on my arm and the unyielding warmth of her gaze. “No she didn’t, only that there was a position in the High Lord’s household that Clotho recommended me for.”
“It was my recommendation actually,” Morrigan smiles proudly, letting her hand drop to her side idly. “Clotho just happened to agree.” The words leave her lips with the ghost of a smirk as she recalls the conversation between her and the High Priestess.
The last time you had spoken to Morrigan would have been in Hewn City, all those years ago. You abandon yourself to those days; when you had been the cursed daughter of a capricious Lord. The girl you were died under that mountain. The woman that stands in her place had been forged of blood, and splintered bone-- made strong by violence and tempered by time.
You nod solemnly and cast a glance to Madja who watches on in quiet curiosity. 
“Rhys is upstairs,” Morrigan says softly to you both, gesturing up the staircase to the upper level of the house, “I’ll fetch him down”. 
You notice then how troubled Mor looks. The rings around her eyes are pale purple and blue and her skin, once radiant, has become pale and sallow. She begins her ascent up the stairs with a small wave of her hand signaling Madja to follow. From here you can see a singular light that pierces through the blanket of the dark that shrouds the upper levels of the house.
Mor regards you once more as Madja passes her on the stairs and points towards the ornate door that leads to the antechamber at the heart of the house. “Go on in, we won’t be a moment.” In a flourish of golden blonde hair and crimson Morrigan winnows away and leaves you to linger in the foyer for a quiet moment. 
The smell of cherries and marigold shades the air in her absence.
Voices, disembodied and distant from the upper levels of the house draw you into the heart of the house.
The antechamber of the High Lords townhouse is a beautiful living room, plunged into near darkness spare the slivers of jade light that dapple the dark walls from the emerald chandelier, even in the darkness you can make out the dark marble of the hearth that is draped with moonflowers and ivy. The low backed chairs are elegant and worn from use and there are books strewn about the room and a small library contained neatly in the alcove. 
Your eyes find the painting hung above the hearth; immortalized on oil and canvas the High Lord of Night and his Lady. The High Lord is painted in a deep navy tunic and the silver paint mimics the delicate embroidery favored by the Velarian tailors in The Rainbow. His violet eyes shine bright against the dark. 
He is a thing of dark beauty, you think.
In this light, his High Lady looks as though she is wreathed in starlight as smiles down on the antechamber from her place above the hearth. You observe the pointed curve of her nose and the upturn of her cerulean eyes and something aching and jealous festers in you at the sight of her beauty. 
Otherworldly and ethereal.
“It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” The low tenor of a man calls out from the darkness of the room, the voice is measured and devoid of any emotion as it permeates the dark. The male cuts an intimidating figure in the low light and all thought and sound eddies from your mind. You’re sure the sound of your heart like an echoing war drum is loud enough to shake the mountains as he takes a step towards you.
“High Lord?” you question. He steps further into the light and you regard him pensively; his skin is pallid and his eyes are ringed with dark circles of amethyst that trouble you. His onyx hair is left tousled and the ends have grown long enough to curl away from the harsh lines of his face. The sharp junction of his jaw has become obscured by the smatterings of coarse, black hair that grow there.
Even still, even in the unforgiving jade light, he is the most beautiful male you have ever seen. He smells of night blooming jasmine and violets undercut with something inherently masculine. Pine and whiskey perhaps. 
His presence is something truly captivating; dark and intoxicating. When he looks at you there is only dark in those violet eyes. 
The High Lord sinks into the worn armchair by the hearth with a deep sigh and for a moment he allows his eyes to flutter closed as he breathes deeply and all you can do is surrender yourself to that dark magnetism. The dying fire in the hearth warms him and in this light you notice the golden hues of his skin and the dark inky trails tattooed across the planes of his chest where his shirt opens. 
“You’re staring--” The High Lord’s violet eyes falls onto you. In those liminal spaces between the seconds, when he is looking at you, all ceases to be. You tilt your chin downwards, hoping to avert his gaze, as you offer him a courteous bow. 
“My apologies High L-” the apology is cut off by the High Lords gentle protests. None of that, Love.
You pray to the mother that he doesn’t notice the flush along the tops of your cheeks or the wild fluttering of your heart at the pet name.
“Sit down,” The High Lord gestures simply to the seat across from him by the hearth and his whole demeanor is somehow softer when you deign to look at him again. Wordlessly you comply with his request, a careful hand runs down the length of your robes to smooth out the lazy pleats in the skirt as they fan out around you in the low backed chair and while you don’t dare to meet his eyes directly you can feel him looking at you.
    “I didn’t mean to startle you,” he apologizes though his voice is distant, despondent even and his eyes find the painting that looms over the hearth. “The portrait-- It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” He muses, tipping the rim of his whiskey glass towards the portrait. 
“Very beautiful, High Lord.” you agree, smoothing the heavy material of your robes again. He watches you then with a curious glint in his eyes and he takes a few moments to assess you.
“Just Rhysand will do,” He smiles lightly, though there's a sense of apprehension as he regards you playing with the threads of your sleeves for the third time in so many moments, “there’s no need for such formalities when it’s just the two of us.” 
“No of course not,” You agree and look at him through thick lashes and offer him a small smile in return, “forgive me, I’m--” you extend a hand to him over the small end table between the arm chairs and he takes it in earnest shaking it lightly. A calloused pad of his thumb rubs an absentminded circle into the skin of your hand before he brings your hand, trembling and slender, to the sulk of his lips and places a chaste kiss against the knuckles. 
“I know who you are, Priestess,” he says lightly-- playfully. You offer him a polite laugh in return and nod your head again. 
Something dark burns in his eyes in those moments; silver and violet. Like the darkness between the stars. He smiles to himself then, a soft beautiful thing. A secret shared between him and the dying light in the hearth as he picks at an errant threat on the stitching of his shirt.
“Why am I here, Rhysand?” You ask, inhaling deeply, hoping that his answer might assuage the anxiety that has been coiling in your stomach all afternoon. The door to the antechamber opens then and light, golden and radiant spills into the room all at once. The radiant light reveals the room to you fully, you observe the emerald velvet chairs and the dark wood furnishings, the landscapes hung on the walls and the rare manuscripts and novels bound all in black that line the walls. 
This house is something truly breathtaking. 
It feels like a home you realize. 
“There you are!” Morrigan's velvet voice smothers the morose tension in the room as she comes into view. She’s since shed the tiredness that plagued her before and you notice the way her hair frames her face like a halo of gold in the soft ochre light. In her arms, swaddled in sapphire spider silk, is the High Lord’s son. 
“We were beginning to wonder where you had gone.” Mor coos at the bundle in her arms as she approaches Rhysand who takes the babe in his strong arms. 
As if he could get any more beautiful-- the man looks as though he was carved by The Mother. 
It’s wrong, you know. He is your High Lord and you are…
The cursed daughter of a capricious Lord, you remind yourself.
Rhysand glances at me hesitantly and I meet his eyes briefly before focusing on the babe in his arms. He’s since broken loose from the swaddling and his chubby fist clutches at his fathers shirt. I can just see the top of his little head, it's all tufts of curly blue-black hair and pointed pink ears. You smile fondly to yourself as he continues to wriggle in his father’s grasp. 
Gods, it’s been so long since you had smiled that wide without the feeling of guilt that usually attends it. 
“You used to be a governess, didn’t you?” Mor says by way of explanation for your summons. To her credit her smile never falters even as your demeanor hardens against her, “Clotho said you had talked about it a few times.” 
“Yes. I was,” You admit swallowing thickly, your voice comes out strained like the words themselves pain you to speak, “that was a long time ago though.”
That had been long before him. 
You must have only been a youngling yourself. You had been happy-- that much you remember. Those were the happy recollections of your old life; summers spent under the opal lights of The Moonstone place, children’s laughter like birdsong that breaks apart in the humid air as you danced and sang long into the nights. Of dark autumns and smoky air, a bonfire and a small hand that holds your own with such gentle reverence. 
“Clotho said you wanted to leave the Library?” Rhysand questions you, his eyes are dark and filled with a thinly veiled darkness that draws you into their depths as you speak to him without pretense. 
“I do,” You answer him honestly, your voice wavering only a little, “I don’t want to spend my days rotting in the depths of that House.”
Rhysand considers it carefully and his face twists into a pained expression that almost breaks your resolve. You hadn’t meant to hurt him-- never. But you’re done hiding in the dark. 
The world is a cruel place and full of cruel men. It always had been and it always will be. There is nought you can do to change that. So why should you cower from the world any longer? 
You want to live. 
The whining of the restless babe in Rhys’ arms rouses your attention and something akin to longing gathers in your chest as you regard him. You pull a lip between your teeth as he fusses and Rhysand struggles to soothe him. The babe looses a cry that comes out as a pitiful howl and you can feel a small ripple of power permeate the air.
“May I hold him?” The words take everyone in the room by surprise and the High Lord only nods easily and stands to pass the babe into your arms.
“I’m grateful,” You continue as Rhysand stands before you and transfers his son’s weight into the crook of your arm, “To you and your court for providing me, and girls like me with somewhere to heal but--” 
“But you weren’t meant to cower in the darkness of the library forever.” Rhysand’s words come out as little more than a whisper and the feeling of his warm breath on your skin is something entirely perverse. 
You shake your head, mouthing an inaudible ‘no’ before lowering yourself back into the chair by the hearth, hoping to hide the rosy blush that spreads across your cheeks. Rhys doesn’t retreat back into his armchair like you had thought he might and instead sinks to his knees before you and allows one of his son's fists to wrap around his ring finger. The babe seems to quieten then in your arms as he nuzzles against your chest, one balled first clinging to his father and the other pulling at the neckline of your robes and he smiles sleepily in your arms.
Looking at him now you are overcome with the realization of the absence that had stained this family’s happiness. Rhysand had given himself completely to a woman who had changed her mind. And their son-- their son; all cherub cheeked and big blue eyes framed with dark lashes-- had been abandoned by the woman who was supposed to love him without condition. Before the ghost of her had been an abstract thing. Something intangible and errant, a whisper or a memory, but now, as you look between the babe in your arms and the woman immortalized about the hearth you feel nothing but biting fury. A dangerous wrath only tempered by the stilling of the High Lord beside you. 
It is Morrigan’s movement at the side of the room that rouses you from thought. “Then perhaps we can come to an arrangement?” The smile that graces her lips is brilliant and calculating and the sparkle in those umber eyes tells you she is genuine in his intentions.
“An arrangement?” You ask hesitantly, raising one arched brow to her. 
“Yes.” The High Lord nods in agreement as Morrigan approaches you all casually, sauntering over to snatch a glass of wine from the decanter, “you’re free to leave the Library at any time but--”
“Help me take care of Nyx,” The High Lord beats you to it, his voice is soft and gentle and one of his fingers runs along the curve of Nyx’s ear as he begins to doze in your arms. 
“High Lor-” You start, and you’re torn between declining outright and trying to dissuade them altogether, “Mor, I haven’t cared for a babe in well over 60 years.”
“Listen to me,” Rhysand’s violet gaze is unyielding and when you can no longer avert his gaze he takes on of your hands in his own and all but pleads with you,  “take care of Nyx, for one year-- just until I get used to doing it on my own-- just until he starts his pre-schooling.” 
The thought of him raising his son all alone pains you, a physical, bone deep ache that settles over you. You mourn for him then, for the love he thought he had, for all that he lost and then you mourn for the babe in your arms. For the son who will grow up without knowing his mother’s love. The High Lord looks at you through dark lashes and you note the tiredness in his eyes and the desperate sadness that seems to radiate from him these days and yet, he smile softly at you. As one might smile at something lovely and precious. 
“And in return?” You ask peering down at him with sympathetic eyes when his whole body goes lax.
“I’ll help you get set up somewhere-- anywhere you want.” The words come quickly and if you were a cruel woman you would see what more he would offer you. But when he’s looking at you like you might just be his last hope you can’t find it in you to do anything but allow yourself to be persuaded by him.
You see a home; a cottage maybe, made of ancient stone and covered with climing ivy and jasmine. On the outskirts of Velaris, away from the artisans and market stalls of the main square, but close enough that you never feel truly alone. A home and it smells of mandarin and moonflowers, the sound of children laughing, and a garden blooming with violets in the garden in the leonine yellow heat of high summer. You smile wistfully and you swear you feel the gentle caress of a hand in your mind's eye. 
“You can live here with us in the meantime” Rhysand continues gesturing to the house around you. 
It’s warm and inviting and your body sings in response to the prospect. 
“I don’t think that's a good--” 
“Just until you find somewhere of your own.” He assures you standing to his full height before you. He casts a morose glance to the portrait that hangs about the hearth and you can see the moment his violet eyes meet painted cerulean. 
“Rhys--” You warn gently. 
“Please,” He turns to you again and the desperation in his tone has you yielding to him further, a gentle sweep over your face before settling on the sleeping babe in your arms, “please.” He repeats it once more and you swear your heart breaks just a little bit for him. 
He had saved you once, you think. You had only been a girl then but you remember looking at him in that light; he looked like the shadow of some dark winged God-- avenging and angelic.
Perhaps this time the girl can save the God.
“A bargain then.” You muse lightly holding out a pinky finger to him.
Rhysand huffs out a laugh and curls his finger around your own. Nyx’s hand seems to flex in response, his own tiny pinky finger outstretched in agreement. 
“A bargain.” With the simple confirmation you feel the gentle burn of a promise as it kisses its way up your wrist, and you see Rhysand’s own inky sigil as it glows faintly on the skin of his outstretched arm.
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arminsumi · 6 months
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THE SPRING I MET YOU
GOJO さとる
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He hates spring because of "allergies"; he blames his sniffly nose and red eyes on the season.
Warnings : angst (heartbreak)
Playme : First Love/Late Spring
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SPRING 2006
You had met Gojo Satoru through a common friend — Geto Suguru.
Oh how many times had you heard him say, like a broken record;
"You really have to meet this guy, you're gonna click with him I just know it. You're like the same person."
You're like the same person.
Suguru'd nag you to meet Satoru ever since he entered Jujutsu High, because he thought he was... you know, just the kinda guy you'd fall in love with. And he hated to see you moping around, lonely and hopelessly seeking a lover that was certainly not "coming to you on a summer breeze" like your mother insisted.
So you met Satoru, by Suguru's demand.
And your first impression of him was: oh no; he's an idiot.
A loud-mouthed, obnoxious idiot. Inappropriate. Overconfident. Irresponsible.
And his first impression of you was: eh, she's too shy.
A put-together, attractive woman. Too proper. Too shy. Too responsible.
If you and him were words, then you were antonyms to each other.
But that didn't matter, it was just the peripheral view you had of each other; something still drew you into each other. Like the universe was drawing up a constellation especially for you and him.
What did you have in common? Nothing. What did you like about his personality? Nothing. But Satoru was always nobody but himself and you liked that. That's the thing about him that saved you from viewing him as an unworthy madman.
And you? He thought you were always trying too hard to be somebody else, someone you were not, someone you could never be — and he wanted to change that. To see what was beneath the diffidence, beneath the plastic sheet that you covered over the image of your self.
He wanted to provoke you more than anyone else, not for the purpose of eliciting a cheap reaction and feeling fleeting amusement, but because he wanted to get you out of your shell.
His heart was on his sleeve, and yours was wrapped up in winter layers even though it was a warm spring. Satoru peeled off the layers one by one, until finally he found his gold; your sweet, tender, loving heart. And once he found it he grabbed it in a way that showed he intended for no one else to steal it from him; his love, all his.
It was just beautiful from then on. You and him. Satoru and you. The two stars in the constellation that the universe specifically designed just for you and him. Only you and him.
How did the first date happen? It just happened. How did the first kiss happen? It just happened. How did the first slow dance happen? It just happened. How did the boyfriend girlfriend thing happen? It just happened.
Everything between you and him always just happened. Like Tetris blocks falling perfectly into place. Like puzzle pieces perfectly connecting. Like clockwork.
No friction, no tediousness, no miscommunication between your stars. You and him shared your minds, bodies and souls with each other.
Like you were the same person.
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SPRING 2009
Satoru's face trembled and nose reddened as tiny tears rolled out of his eyes.
This was the first time he had cried in three years. And it was a first for having an emotional breakdown in public, in the middle of a busy train station.
"Satoru, I'm sorry." you said to him. "I have to start my life."
"But we've already started a life here, together!" he yelled with a broken voice, in the middle of that busy train station. People looked.
It was Spring of 2009; you were breaking up with a 20 yr old Gojo Satoru as sensibly and sensitively as you could, but he still acted like a child.
When you and him had gotten together in 2006, both of you were just simple-minded, carefree teenagers who had yet to be shaped by the hurt of life.
Oh him and his prismatic feelings, they spill out the edge at the right angle and show a display of everything you never thought he felt.
"Things have changed. I've changed, and so have you. We have to move on from each other." you said, and he shook his head and looked at you like he was falling to pieces.
"I haven't changed! I'm still your boy. C-can't we talk about this at the cafe—
"—Satoru, my train is here."
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SPRING 2018
"—Sensei, the train is here!"
He was interrupted back then just like he's been interrupted now from his daydream of you.
"What's the matter?"
Gojo-sensei's blindfold soaks up his tears, but it can't muffle his sniffling or reddened cheeks and ears. His nose wrinkles up and wiggles to the side as he sniffles and runs the back of his hand under his nostrils.
"Allergies. This is why I hate spring." he chuckles.
"Aw, get allergy medicine."
"Yeah yeah, I will. You rascals catch your train before it runs off without you." Gojo
「じゃあ!」 Yuji raises a hand of goodbye to his teacher and boards the train with Megumi and Nobara.
He waves goodbye to his students, lifting his blindfold to catch a peek before the train carries them out of sight. His smile drops when they can no longer see him at all.
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He stares for a long moment at the place where you once stood, and remembers two memories;
One late spring you were on your tip-toes kisssing him for the first time.
And one late spring you were waiting for your train, breaking his heart with goodbye.
© arminsumi
I do not permit the copying/reposting/translation/plagiarism of my works. Do not steal what I've worked hard to create.
This is fictional work.
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3l1j4hhh · 6 months
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drabble: riding wriothesley while he can’t touch you. no cuz shut uppp, he wouldn’t be the complete broken mess like everyone else would be. he’d be begging to touch you, to help you feel good. wriothesley 100% falls on the service spectrum.
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wriothesley’s reeling, groggy and confused from what he assumes to be a late night—who can really tell from within the fortress of meropide? his vision is slightly blurry, just about able to see you sitting prettily on his desk. a tired smile covers as his face as he takes in the sight: you’re naked, legs crossed and arms perched behind you to support your weight.
he’s only tired, the countless amount of paperwork sprawled and scattered about his desk, the very papers that you’re sitting on. his pens are next to you, still clicked open. as he was finishing up only the last few bits of his previous document, you strode on in up the stairs, a playful tint in your voice as you called out to him.
“your grace?” the smirk was evident in your voice, and wriothesley couldn’t hold himself back.
now, here he is, handcuffed to his own chair by his very own handcuffs. you’re riding him, earnestly and pouring those sweet and intoxicating sounds down his ears. he’s moaning against your neck, wrists jolting every time your pussy engulfs his cock whole. he’s almost pussy drunk, yet still mindful enough to want you, to want to feel you.
“sweetheart, c’mon, spare me a little,” he moans through an exasperated sigh. he feels as if you’re sucking his soul out of his own body, the pleasure in his cock causing him to spiral.
“let me feel you, yeah? let me touch you, wanna feel you.” he almost begs, a still sort of stableness in his voice. his fingers are twitching, wanting to break free of his handcuffs and be able to touch you as you ride him.
“oh? perhaps your grace isn’t that sensitive today as i thought? let’s do something about that,” you purr in a way that sends wriothesley near his breaking point. little does he know, you’re an evil one.
a choked moan bubbles past his throat, breath hitching once you take him even deeper than before, fastening your pace. he curses under his breath, head dropping down to your shoulder. his mouth is hot against your skin, pants and moans sourcing all from poor wriothesley. you’re so evil to him, riding him like this, depriving him of the ability to touch you. he can only watch as you bounce and grind against his cock, tits bouncing every time you lift yourself off him.
“i’m gonna cum, wrio, will you cum for me too?”
as if he wasn’t already shaking, almost on the edge of trying to rip his arms out of those godforsaken handcuffs. his legs shake as he orgasms, hips jolting up and trying desperately to fuck up into you. he can only hear the sound of your giggles as he comes down from his high.
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hhnguyen · 1 year
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aren’t you just precious
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Everything medical related was a google search, so those in the medical field please don’t come for me - I was a literature major for a reason 😭
♢ Pairing: Parents!Jake & Neytiri x Oldest daughter!Reader
♢ Word count: 2k 
♢ Genre: suspense, action, angst, slight humor - Warnings: explicit description of injuries, blood, cursing, reader is a lil crazy
⌲ Description: Your iknimaya goes a little south. Aka introducing the ‘demon ikran.’
M A S T E R L I S T
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Jake Sully, a marine veteran at the age of twenty-two had gone through absolute hell on earth before ever setting his disabled ass on Pandora. 
He thought he had seen the worse - comrades shot down right in front of his eyes, the blood covering their skin, blank dead eyes staring into his soul. Sometimes there were those who were actually blown to bits by bombs and grenades, screaming not even five feet away from him as they clutched their missing limbs, begging a nonexistent God for mercy.
Then there was his own injury. The pain he hardly remembered, because he had gotten to the point of delusion when they finally managed to drag him out of the war zone, half dead, and to the VA hospital.  
The incoherent words he had heard after waking up from his surgery despite his hazy vision and buzzing hearing at that time, yet the truth coming out of the doctor’s mouth had still hit him in the face like the largest ‘fuck you and your life’ to exist. 
“...ave severe spinal injury...fixable...expensive, marine.”
A severe spinal injury that was fixable but too expensive for a marine like him to afford. 
For an active man as he had been in the past, the thought of being paralyzed from the waist had been his worst nightmare to the point of being ready to waste away his life. 
Though even after all that shit, Jake Sully felt like he wanted to throw up as he stared at his oldest baby girl at the fresh age of fourteen laying there in front of him; delirious as he had once been in the same position, bleeding and bruised. 
He could only thank Eywa that your heart was still beating and your body intact. 
Well, mostly. 
The almost nauseous angle of your left wrist certainly did not look natural. And their bones were fortified, stronger than anything else to human knowledge. Yet it had managed to snap as easily as that. 
Neytiri - his beautiful, poor mate. She was distraught, one would say more so than him. Sitting only inches away from your fevering form in one of Hell’s Gate treating rooms for avatars, muttering prayers with dried tears upon her face. 
Your injuries had been so severe that not even the abilities of your grandmother, the Tsahik, could heal you solely through the spiritual power of Eywa. These kinds of injuries needed the advanced surgery of human technology. 
His other children were barred from coming inside, having been firmly ordered to remain in their village as he and Neytiri made sure that you would be okay. None of them wanted to keep them away, but neither did they want them to be traumatized by seeing your bloodied and broken form. 
A stark contrast from the smiling and proud sister that they knew. 
And yet, you had still managed to complete your iknimaya. 
Jake watched with a bated breath from the air upon Bob, his own faithful ikran through the years, as he saw the slight encouraging push Neytiri had given you on the edge of the nesting place. Your, oh so small form, looked firm and stubborn as you steadily stalked forward in a crouched form, the band for the beak held in your grasp with determination. 
He watched as one ikran flew away. Then another. And another. A third one. Fourth. Fifth. Sixth. 
He had lost count after the eleventh. 
You were getting frustrated, he could see that. Neytiri was still there, calling out for you to calm down. To be patient as he moved Bob a little bit closer, but not too much to distract you if you were to see him hovering. 
And there he was. 
Jake had seen it before you did. The vicious screech even reached him high up in the clouds and echoed above all the other ikrans. 
He felt his blood run cold as the midnight blue beast, nearly black in color with its yellow and green detailing jumped down from the highest point of the rocks and landed behind you as you whirled around with snarl of your own. 
But then as fleeting as it had been, you had grinned, taking in the magnificent animal despite its bloodthirsty aggressiveness. 
“Aren’t you just precious?” Neytiri had told him of your words in the aftermath. 
His mate hollered in encouragement, and he could hardly stop the prideful tug of his own lips. 
Rather than you leaping on the beast, Jake straightened up as he saw the ikran run at you as well. Both were only inches away from crashing, as you last minute decided to slide beneath its belly - slight enough to fit as you rolled away on the other side and then slung the catcher around its mouth swiftly before throwing yourself on its back. 
His expectations had been hopeful from that moment. Positive. But wrong, oh so wrong. 
Rather than trying to snap at you by turning, he watched in horror as the ikran seemed to have a human mind as it slammed against a stone wall, you hitting it first. 
Neytiri had screamed, already half leaping forward but stopping herself as she saw you still clinging to the beast. 
Both had thought that had been the worst of it until the ikran tried it again. This time deliberately falling backward to land on its back with a rumble, where you were hung on. 
“LET GO MA ‘ITE! LET GO!” Neytiri was yelling. Or begging. He couldn’t be sure in his own fear. 
But both of them underestimate you, as a growl mixed with what Jake had assumed to be a painful yell from yourself erupted. Legs manage to wrap around the animal’s neck despite being crushed underneath its weight. 
He saw belatedly you were only holding on to the banshee catcher with one hand as you pulled at its head hard enough to make the animal let out another vicious muted screech. 
And then you truly proved you were his daughter. 
“C’MON YOU MOTHERFUCKER. GRANDPA BOB WAS BETTER THAN THIS!”
The ikran had gotten angrier, trashing before suddenly rolling like a fucking bowling pin on the stone-covered ground. 
Towards the edge of the cliff. 
Neytiri ran, and Jake dove, both reaching out and screaming your name as you and the ikran fell off the edge. 
As his mate leaned almost desperately over the edge, Jake forced himself to draw Bob back up, only for a few seconds - not to interfere with the rite. But it was in those few seconds he felt like his heart had stopped beating. 
There was that familiar screech again. 
Then you were soaring. 
Up in a straight line, past Neytiri and him. Tsaheylu clearly made as the ikran listened to your orders. 
There was a blinding grin on your face as you soared, clearly looking for him and letting out a whoop. 
The moment your eyes caught his, Jake felt his grin slip. 
Your eyes, open just moments before suddenly rolled back. Your whole body went slack as you fell over the side, your newly bonded ikran screeching at the sudden weightless feeling as the bond broke and your body went straight down. 
Jake hadn’t heard his desperate yell, this time diving down without stopping. 
He thought you were dead when he managed to catch you and flew back up, only to have Neytiri meet him in the air on her own mount, an expression so clearly in distress. Without a word, they both made haste back to the village, your newly bonded ikran following closely behind. 
“How is she?” His voice sounded like it had gone over fifty years of smoking with no water. It felt like his whole body was weighed down with stones. 
“She’s alive,” that’s all that Max could offer with a grim expression. “She will need surgery. The momentum of her slamming repeatedly against stones with the ikran’s weight on top has managed to collapse a lung.”
Jake had never wanted to sob like a newborn baby until now. But he needed to remain calm, or at least sane. For Neytiri’s sake, and your siblings.
“Usually surgeries like these lead to long-term conditions in life, but we’re certain that with the Na’vi biology she will heal just fine without complications. But it’s the healing that will take time.”
He was nodding along, but it felt like he was far away. Only hearing a slight inconsistent sound in his ears as he watched through the see-through glass into the room where you were all connected up to tubes and an oxygen mask. 
It was so human, the whole situation of you being in a hospital bed for avatars - Jake wanted to laugh. Not in humor, but maybe in slight delusion at the situation. 
“Okay, okay…” he swallowed. “Anything else?”
His human friend was taking pity on him, Jake knew. 
Max has been there since the beginning. Seeing Jake growing his own family and now being placed in this position. “Besides the broken wrist and strained ankle, it’s mostly cuts and bruises. So she will have to wear a brace as well as remain seated for the next week or so. And check-ups every three days.“
“Yeah, we can do that,” Jake croaked. “When’s the surgery?”
“As soon as possible.”
Another nod. “Thanks, man.”
“Of course.”
He had to nearly pry Netytiri away from you as she snarled protectively. But he had to explain that she couldn’t join in on the surgery due to contamination concerns. The whole room had to be fixed to match that of a Na’vi body, the surgeons wearing oxygen masks as the space was filled with Pandora’s toxic air for your sake. 
It was an open lung surgery, Jake had been told. A risky procedure even on earth. It had taken four hours. Four hours full of anxiety and fear. 
But you had pulled through, Max said, Norm closely behind with a relieved teary smile himself. The man was like another uncle to the kids despite his avatar form. He had watched their ceremonies, rites and connections to Eywa. So to Norm, this was just like a family member to him. 
You had slept for a full day and a half after the surgery, still confined to the avatar hospital room before your eyes had fluttered open with difficulty. A cough erupted followed by your painful whine at the action.
Netytiri had hushed you gently, crouching down and stroking your hair back. Fresh tears fell at seeing you conscious again after so long, sobs breaking out as you flashed a sleepy smile at her. 
Neytiri had felt like Eywa had pulled the entirety of Pandora away from underneath her feet during the hours of your examination and surgery. Clutching Jake to her and never wanting to let go as her oldest baby was at the mercy of nature and your own will to live through. 
But she knew. 
You were strong. You always had been. And you had fought. 
Neytiri had never imagined a day when one of her biggest nightmares nearly came to pass. 
To lose one of her children. 
She would rather throw herself off the highest point on Ayram alusìng than lose one of her precious babies before their time. She believed in Eywa with her whole heart and soul and knew their beings were only borrowed and one day had to be returned. 
But Eywa would not take her children away from her until Neytiri herself agreed. 
Until that time, she would do anything to protect them. But to have it happen during one of their most treasured rites in life had prevented her from doing many things. 
Interfering for once. Because you had said so before as if knowing how horribly wrong it could go. 
“Do not stop me, mama. I can do this on my own.”
Of course, you could. And you did. 
Despite having to brush the doors to Eywa’s home yourself to succeed. 
And as your parents carefully helped you back home to the village after five days of observation at Hell’s Gate after your surgery, you couldn’t help but snicker despite the stabs of pain.  
Your mom had admonished you gently to not aggravate your wounds. Whereas your dad held back the roll of his eyes with amusement tickling the sides of his mouth. 
“Why are you laughing, flower?”
Your grin was shit-eating as you looked up at him.
“My iknimaya was so much cooler than Toruk Makto’s.”
“You little skxawng.”
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I feel like I lowkey pulled this one out of my ass, but oh well. 
taglist: @nao-cchi @eywas-heir @ssc7514 @spicycloudsalad @calums-betch @httpjiikook @ricecakeslove @fanboyluvr @iwaslikeblah   @the-wandering-pan-ace @avatarloversblog @eternallyvenus @enchantinggoateefox @arianapntn @heydemonsitsme @slyvixen1029​ @promiseofeywa @love13tter @directioner5life @bambisposts-blogs​ @melllinaa​  @sugarmummystuff6​ @lovekeeho​ @hai-kbai​
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rawrsatthetree · 7 months
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Dark urge and Astarion hold a baby
GN!Durge!Tav x Astarion
Inspired by a fanart of Astarion holding a baby and an audio of Neil talking about babies as Star
Warings: well it's druge so descriptions of violence
As you and your party waded through the crowd of refugees a strange sound caught your attention. It sounded like crying but far too high pitched to be any person or child. The sound grated and scrapped at your mind and before your realized it, you had wandered off from your party in search of the source.
Among the crowd of broken families and lost souls you found an old elven woman cradling a squirming bundle in her arms. The thing wriggling about in her grasp was what had been making the terrible noise that had now quieted down into a pathetic whine.
You didn't notice how close you were lingering until the old woman spoke up. "Can I help you dear?" She questioned, her demeanor warm and friendly.
"Oh, um I was just um..." You were at a loss of words, your eyes fixed on the thing in her arms.
"Would you like to see him? Come closer, no need to be shy." She gave you a warm smile.
Hesitantly you shuffled forward to where you could see what it was she was holding, expecting some sort of animal or other strange creature.
"A baby?"
"Yes, a precious little thing, his name's Arthur." The woman rocked him in her arms.
The baby took a reprieve from it's fussing to turn and look at you. It stared at you blankly for a moment as you stared back before it broke into a smile and babbled at you.
"Would you look at that." The woman cooed, "he hasn't smiled once since he lost his mother to the Absolute's army."
The very sight made you mind ache and twist. Thoughts of all the horrible ways you could end the small innocent life flooded your skull. Perhaps you could simply smash it, the little ball of goo and viscera that it is. Or maybe it would be fun to squeeze its little neck until its doll like eyes popped out of its skull and its neck snapped.
Your vision started to blur, your pulse pounding, hands shaking. You tried to regain your sanity, remembering the mediation exercises you had practiced with Halsin. First ground yourself, breathe, what can you hear, what can you see.
Breathe in, you heard the footsteps on the crowd.
Breathe out, you felt the cool breeze.
Breathe in, you smelled smoke and farm animals.
Breathe out, you heard the chatter of the crowd around you.
Breathe in, you heard the old woman speak. "Would you like to hold him?"
Breathe out, you could see the baby still smiling up at you.
Your mind cleared as your vision came back into focus. The Urge had passed for now and relief washed over you. You answered the woman, "Can I? Are you sure its okay?" You asked mostly to her but partly to yourself.
"Of course dear, he seems quite fond of you and it would give my old arms a much needed rest." The woman held little Arthur out to you.
You stood there stiff as a board not sure how you were meant to take the baby.
"Have you never held a baby before?" She asked noticing your apprehension.
You shook your head 'no'. Even if you could remember you doubted you had ever held a baby in your past, at least in a way that it's limbs stayed intact.
"Here, hold your arms like mine, almost like your making a basket."
You followed her example as best you could. The woman shifted the baby into your arms with out warning.
"There just like that! Be sure to support his head, see you're a natural." She encouraged you as you panicked with the infant in your grasp.
After an awkward moment of adjusting to the warm squirmy little weight in your arms, Arthur calmed and snuggled into your chest. The innocent little thing feel asleep in your arms happy and at peace. You were over come with emotion, it felt so sick and wrong, it shouldn't have been possible for you to hold something so precious. Yet there your were holding a baby gently without any intent to harm it. The feeling of his little body in your arms filled your heart with a feeling you didn't quiet understand but it brought tears to your eyes all the same.
*************
Ever since that night he had you restrained, Astarion had tried his damnedest to keep an eye on you. It figured the moment he got distracted by some snide comment from Shadowheart, you had vanished. He hadn't even noticed until he went to turn to you for back up only to discover you were gone. Panic over came him as he frantically scanned the crowd for any sign of you. Either you had been abducted by one of your countless enemies or your urge had drawn your attention away from the party. Both outcomes filled him with dread.
Without even a word to the others he rushed though the crowd. He smelled the air for any hint of blood, yours or your victim's. Nothing, at least you weren't hurt or hadn't hurt anyone else yet. He only grew more worried as he moved though the refugees with no sign of you, surly you couldn't have gotten far.
Just when he was sure you had been kidnapped by some villain never to be seen again, he found you. There you were with your back to him standing with some old woman. Whatever relief he felt was quickly replace with concern as he noticed how you rocked and swayed.
"Darling, what are you doing?" He approached you cautiously hoping he wasn't to late to save you from the urge.
"Oh, is this your husband? What a handsome young man." The old crone greeted.
Astarion ignored the woman only focused on stopping you from what ever nightmarish act you were about to commit. Before he could reach out to you and pull you way, you turned around to him.
"Astarion look! I'm holding a baby!" You beamed at him. You moved closer and whispered so only he could hear you, "and I'm not hurting him."
You were a sight to behold grinning from ear to ear with dried tears staining you cheeks. Just as you said, there in you arms was a fat little lump of a baby curled up and completely intact.
He wasn't sure why but seeing you standing there with a baby cradled in you arms made his cold heart ache. He was relieved you were safe, proud that you had fought through your urge, deeply sad - although that was nothing new; but there was something else, a longing he didn't understand. Not wanting to dwell on the feeling he turned his attention to the baby.
"Just look at the little thing, so cute and helpless." He smiled fondly at the infant.
You noticed the way he looked at the baby with such softness, a genuine smile tugging at his lips. "Can my husband hold him for a bit?" You asked the woman, not realizing how naturally the word 'husband' had rolled off your tongue.
"What?" Astarion was taken aback, "No, I couldn't possibly." He looked to the woman hoping she would object.
The woman gave the two of you a knowing look before answering, "of course dear."
You turned back to him, your eyes shining, holding out the baby, "only if you want you Starlight."
Astarion caved under your loving gaze, he hated how easily you swayed his heart. "well alright give it here, you know I can't say no to that face."
His action did not reflect his words as he stood there froze just as you had, not sure how to take the baby. If he had ever held a baby it was centuries ago long before he had been turned and far to long ago to remember.
"Here Star, hold you arms like mine." You instructed him just as the old woman had done for you before gently passing the baby into his arms.
The aching longing tore a hole in his heart as he held the sleeping infant in his arms. You felt it too as you watched him, your love, cradling the baby as if it were the most precious thing in the world. You moved closer to him warping an arm around his waist, you cuddled into his side as he relaxed into you resting his head against yours. The two of you didn't need words to understand what the other was feeling. The baby, although a source of pain, was also a symbol of your hope. Hope you'd both find freedom, hope you'd survive this whole ordeal, hope you'd have a future.
"Astarion, I-" You were cut off by a familiar voice calling out over the crowd breaking your tender moment.
"There they are! Hey!" Shadowheart was waving at you as she approached with Lae'zel close behind her.
As if snapped out of a trance Astarion quickly handed the baby back to his caregiver and thanked her. He whipped misty eye before either of them could notice.
"What the hells are you two doing, we've been looking everywhere." Shadowheart scolded, examining you both with suspicion.
"Sorry, I had another episode," You lied. "Thankfully Astarion found me before I could hurt anyone."
"Enough doddling, we've wasted enough time searching for you." Lae'zel turned as if to leave with out you. Shadowheart simply rolled her eyes, turning to follow.
"Come my love, we don't want to be left behind." Astarion spoke to you softly as laced his fingers with yours, pulling you toward the party. You waved goodbye to baby Arthur and the woman before turning to continue you journey.
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k9wa · 5 months
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𑣲 RENEWAL. ft. DAN (F)HENG
⠀ — it is not he that is familiar to you, nor you to him.
⠀ OR
⠀ — time and reincarnation aren’t enough to ever make you truly forget each other.
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⚠︎ angst if you squint, fluff, mild hsr spoilers? thank u to the high cloud quintet for having the most heart breaking lore, i listened to memory by toby fox on repeat while writing this.
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dan heng wasn’t sure what to feel when his eyes met yours.
familiarity? no, that’s not possible. he’s never met you.
nostalgia? no, that too was not possible. he cannot name one person who your eyes could possibly remind him of.
…what was it? what was it that had left dan heng unable to will his gaze to move somewhere else? surely the intense eye contact was leaving you uncomfortable, even he was beginning to feel squirmy in his own skin as you stared back at him with an equal intensity.
dan heng can feel something in the deepest pit of his mind, leaking down and adding to the tense knot in his gut. 
yet, the feeling isn’t…unwelcome.
it’s warm. it’s akin to a comforting hand on his shoulder, or a small squeeze to his fingers. he could not, no matter how hard he tried, recall a time such a sensation had left him so utterly speechless. 
“dan heng?”
it’s welt’s voice that finally pulled him out of his trance, his eyes blinking rapidly a few times before he turned his head to look at the older man.
“sorry. what was that?”
dan heng shook his head as if to rid himself of the thoughts of you. what was your name again? yukong had just informed him. not that he was really listening, anyway.
the conversation between his crew and the sky-faring commissions helm master continued on, talk of stellarons and something about the cloud knight’s general. dan heng couldn’t seem to focus despite his efforts.
another voice calls out to him just before he can depart alongside caelus and march, however this time it is not the deep and rough voice of his companion, but one that is much sweeter, and seems to strike a chord somewhere within him.
“dan heng?”
he turns around and is once more met with your eyes. dan heng willed himself to blink and nod before he could be entranced by them once more.
“i apologize, but…”
you trailed off before you were able to get the words out of your mouth, and there you found yourself back in the odd silence the two of you had just broken out of.
“…have we met before?”
you asked, and it finally clicked with dan heng where he had seen only snippets and flashes of you before.
my dreams, he thought. the dreams that haunted him night in and night out, but would occasionally grant him just a glance of a peaceful memory.
“no. we haven’t.”
you’re an amicassador of the sky-fairing commission, one brought on board long after he was banned from the ship that you called home. your meeting at any point before now would have been impossible.
yet, his mind drifts to the occasional memory he has only when deep in slumber.
“yingxing gifted me this.”
he looks down at you, head in his lap as you pull a small jade coin out of your pocket, a fine “永” carefully carved into the surface.
“he has too much time on his hands now that jing yuan is growing.”
your chuckle is soothing to his ears, the sound like a balm applied directly to his soul.
your face is unclear, almost as if his eyes are unfocused. yet your voice is unmistakable.
“i don’t disagree.”
is all he responds, fingers idly pushing a few stray hairs behind your ear as he looks down at you. although he can’t see it, he can feel the grass he and you reside on, smell the pollen off the fresh flowers the breeze blows towards him, can feel the sun on his skin.
“you’re sure?” you question again, voice just as calming as he was sure he’d imagined until now.
“you just—“ you chuckle a bit, almost awkwardly. “—seem so familiar, is all.”
you try to approach the topic subtly, but you truly did know him. from your own dreams, the ones you had that woke you in a cold sweat from just how real and jarring they felt, regardless of whether they were mild or sweet in nature. they conjured such emotion in you.
“baiheng was telling me of reincarnation.”
you muse to him, sitting with one hand on the ground just over his crossed legs, leaving you leaning across him.
“do you believe in such a thing?”
“of course.”
he nods, hand naturally finding it’s place on your waist.
“don’t you?”
“i don’t think so.”
you reach your free hand out to play mindlessly with the silver trim of his robes.
“it’s a nice thought, though.”
dan feng can only hum quietly.
“some day,” he began, drawing your attention back up to his face. “after i reach my end, i’ll come back to find you.”
the small tug of his lips could only be described as a smirk, but it felt softer than that.
“to prove it to you.”
you tilt your head teasingly, brow cocked.
“how will you recognize me?” “I would know you blind.”
he can feel his chest warm as you smile at him.
“i’ll hold you to that.”
“sorry.” dan heng bowed his head lightly. 
“but we haven’t met before.”
he was being truthful, you hadn’t. it was your past lives that you two had been acquainted, had formed a bond so strong that it appeared to have transcended death itself.
dan heng did not wish to have dan feng’s deeds or past haunt him any more than they already do. the urge he felt to sit and talk with you, to perhaps hold your hand or touch your face would surely only lead him down a path he’d apparently gone down centuries ago.
“right.”
you nod at him, bowing yourself.
“sorry to keep you, it was nice to meet you.”
dan heng was released and regrouped with his crew, march and caelus bickering about something or the other and walking ahead of him. he decided to stay a bit further behind with welt.
his decision quickly regretted when welt gave him a knowing look, the lines on the older man’s forehead deepening as his eyebrows pushed together.
“you know them.”
“i know who they used to be. that’s all.”
welt can read the room well enough to know to end the topic there. dan heng had never enjoyed or been keen on talking of dan feng, and being back on the xianzhou alone had already left him with an unusual tension in his shoulders.
even as he walked away, moving up to engage in conversation with the sillier two of the quadrant, dan heng couldn’t shake you from his head. your smile, the way you held yourself as yukong introduced you, the small laugh that he had not expected would weave itself so deeply in his chest.
he kept walking on anyway. dan heng was not him.
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⠀ 𑣲 MASTERLIST / GOT A REQUEST ?
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matts-k1tten · 2 months
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𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐚𝐭 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐬𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭
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summary: Matt and y/n were best friends in high school, after graduation they parted ways and forgot about each other and their feelings for years. But what happens when they finally see each other again?
warnings: swearing, heavy smutttt (like yall voted on), fluff, don’t like it, don’t read it.
*not proofread*
————————
ᵍʳᵃᵈᵘᵃᵗⁱᵒⁿ ᵈᵃʸ
Today’s the day, after this day I’m free from school.
I really won’t miss anyone or anything here. I was always what everyone considered me as, a nerd. Since I always got along with the teachers and always had straight A’s.
But they all agreed on one thing about me, that I was gorgeous. But no one ever went for me because they all thought I was weird.
Not Matt, he loved my weirdness. In fact, he was just like me. He was smart and funny and we got along well. I always had feelings for him. His brothers Nick and Chris were amazing too.
But Matt and I always had a different relationship.
He wasn’t the best looking, but that doesn’t matter because I always go for personality.
So here we are now, graduating school.
“I’m so proud of you Matt, of us. We did it Matt! We survived high school!” I shout as I jump on him.
Matt laughs as he hugs me back. Matt squeezes me with all his strength.
As both of our grips soften I get sad thinking of the downsides of not seeing him everyday anymore. He was the light of my day.
“Matt?” I whisper in his ear in a broken voice.
“Yeah?” He whispers back.
I pull back and look up at him. “Promise you’ll stay in touch?”
He smiles.
“Promise y/n, I’m not going anywhere.” He finishes and hesitates for a moment before he leans in and kisses me.
The kiss was so passionate and sweet I melted in his arms.
I felt like I was in a dream.
I paused for a moment before I kissed him back with all the love I have for him. Kissing him made everything around us disappear it truely felt like it was only me and Matt in the room.
His arms sneak around my waist as mine go around his neck. I feel Matt smile into the kiss.
He pulls me impossibly closer as our lips mold together.
I pull back and smile up at him, he smiles back.
“y/n we have to go celebrate! C’mon let’s go!” My mother shouts from behind me. I look back before dropping my hands from matt’s face slowly.
“I have to go Matt, I’ll call you later. We can hang out tomorrow!” I say as I hold his face and kiss his cheek.
He nods and we both let go.
If only he knew how much I really loved him with all my heart and soul.
-
³ ʸᵉᵃʳˢ ˡᵃᵗᵉʳ
I lay on my bed with my roommate also best friend next to me. After graduation, I moved in with Amelia one of my close friends in high school.
We moved to LA right after graduation to get a fresh start and pursue out youtube career.
We got to busy starting our own youtube channel that we could barely manage to visit home.
We’ve gained so much subscribers and got so much love that I’m so thankful for.
I’m scrolling through TikTok when something pops up.
A video of these boys named the “Sturniolo Triplets”.
Sounded familiar, I just can’t remember.
I go to the comments and they’re filled with comments on comments about how funny they are.
I ask Amelia if she knows.
“Hey do you know who these ‘Sturniolo Triplets’ guys are?”
She looks at my screen and shakes her head. “Never heard of them before.”
I kiss my teeth and search them up on youtube. Their channel immediately pops up with their most popular videos.
I click on one and examine them.
This is a waste of my time.
I click out and put on some music. “C’mon Amelia, we have to get ready for this influencer party!” I shout as a song starts playing. She groans before she sits up with a light tug on her arm.
“Fine! Just let me pick out a dress!” Amelia says with an attitude.
I don’t reply feeding into her attitude. Amelia always has an attitude and I learned how to deal with it because if I’m gonna live with her I have to get used to her.
Amelia stomps off to her room to pick out a dress as I start to dig in my closet.
I found this perfect black silky short dress that really compliments my figure. “Perfect!” I shout to myself.
“Y/n! Should I wear a silky royal blue dress or a silky white dress!” Amelia shouts from down the hall.
“I’m wearing a silky black dress you should wear the whole one to match with me pair it with black heels, I’ll wear white heels!” I yell back.
“That’s a great idea!” Amelia says excitedly and slams her door to change.
I change into my outfit and put on my white heels. I use this black pocket purse to hold my lipgloss, phone, and whatever I need.
I run into the bathroom to do my makeup and Amelia walks in right after me. I take one sink and Amelia takes the other.
-
Amelia pulls up to the huge venue to where the party is at and parks far from the entrance.
“Why’d you have to park so far? We’re gonna get drunk and forget where the car is!” I turn my body to her.
She unbuckles and looks at me with a blank face.
“Not us, you. I’m staying sober tonight I don’t wanna wake up with the worst hangover ever because we have to film tomorrow and I don’t want to have the worst headache while filming.” Amelia says sternly and hops out the car.
I groan and roll my eyes before quickly running up behind her. “Who do you think we’re gonna meet? Oh my god! What if we meet Vinnie Hacker!? Or Baylee Levine, Sam and Colby! Ohh! I hope Colby falls in love with me, he’s so sexy. And oh! Tara Yummy! Oh my god I love Tara Yummy she’s literally my wife! What if we meet Jake-“ Amelia cuts off my rant by stopping us mid walk.
“Shush! Yes! There is a chance we’d meet them but just wait till we get in!” Amelia says now annoyed with my random rant and storms off to the entrance. “Sheesh someone’s got an attitude.” I mumble under my breathe and walk a few inches behind her.
We make it to the entrance and get checked in and are immediately greeted bye loud music and the smell of alcohol mixed with cologne.
I drag Amelia to the bar and I order myself a vodka cranberry. “Are you seriously not gonna drink tonight?” I ask as the bartender slides my drink over to me and smiles.
I smile back and turn back to Amelia.
“Like I told you, we’re filming tomorrow! You can get drunk but I’m not!” Amelia snaps back and opens her phone. “Suit yourself.” I reply as I take a sip and look to the dance floor.
I look around and see many familiar faces of influencers whom I’ve seen around social media.
Someone catches my attention by walking towards Amelia and my direction only to figure out it’s Tara fucking Yummy.
“Hey! I’m such a huge fan of you guys! I just wanted to come over here and tell you guys how much I love and and also ask if I could get a picture. sorry if I’m fan girling!” Tara giggles a bit.
Tara yummy? A fan of, us? I looked stunned for a moment before I snap out of my daze and reply.
“Yes of course! It’s totally fine we love you so much I was actually talking about meeting you before this!” I laugh.
Tara laughs as well as she takes out her phone and snap a picture with us.
“Also before we came in she was talking about how you’re her wife.” Amelia says with a small grin on her face. I smile and shake my head covering my face out of embarrassment.
Tara just laughs at my reaction.
“It’s ok babes, you are my wife. But I also wanted to ask if we could collaborate sometime?” Tara smiles at me. My face lights up as I look at Amelia.
Amelia smiles and nods. “We’d love to collaborate with you!”
“Great! Just give me your numbers and I’ll next you whenever!” Tara replies with the cutest smile.
She hands us her phone and we put our numbers in. We hand it back and she yells a quick thank you and walks away.
I slowly turn to Amelia with a cheeky smile on my face still smiling from the interaction. “Tara yummy is a fan of us and wants to collab!” I scream and hold Amelia’s hands.
Amelia smiles and laughs.
“We should go dance!” I yell over the music. “Yes!” Amelia replies and drags me out. Amelia and I start jumping around and screaming with the music.
I stop for a moment to catch my breathe and meet a pair of frozen blue eyes.
Still looked so familiar, I just couldn’t remember.
He was staring right at me as I examined his features. Brunette fluffy hair, defined face shape, slight beard, tall, and wearing all black with keys hanging from his pants.
My jaw slightly drops. He was fine.
He seems to be checking me out pretty well by the way his eyes keep going up and down my body. He was just standing there with a solo cup in his hands and bites down on his lip as his eyes trail all around my body.
His eyes suddenly meet mine and chills surge through my body. His stare was so intense.
He looked at me through his hooded eyes. I couldn’t look away and neither did he. It was only then when Amelia taps me. “What are you looking at?” I break eye contact with the stranger and look back at Amelia. “Nothing, let’s just go sit down my feet hurt.” I smile slightly as she nods.
We go back to the bar stools and take a seat. We start talking and laughing and after a while I look around my eyes finding the boy again. But this time he’s on the dance floor with a smile and he’s holding a girl, a beautiful girl.
It kind of hurt, seeing him there with another girl.
I didn’t even know why it hurt.
Watching them sway to the music her hips gliding against his with his hands around her waist. I wore a slight frown and turn back to Amelia with my head down looking at my lap. She notices the change of mood.
“What happened?” Amelia questions. My head snaps up at her. “I-I don’t know, nothing.” I respond and look back at the dance floor. But the girl wasn’t there anymore, she was replaced with two other boys who look identical to the boy. My eyebrows furrow as I glare at them.
The same boy that was staring at me earlier turns his head in my direction and meets my gaze. I sit there frozen staring at him once again. The two other boys continue to dance as he just stands there moving his body a bit, staring at me.
“Are you sure nothings wrong? you keep zoning out.” Amelia says from beside me which makes me break the eye contact.
I nod. “Yeah.” I reply and turn my whole body back to the bar. There was a slight tap on my left shoulder.
I jump a bit and turn to who tapped me. I met the same pair of blue eyes as he stared down at me with a cold stare.
“Hey, I just came over here to say hello and say you look awfully familiar.” The guy speaks. I just smile and open my mouth to speak when he cutes me off.
“I’m sorry, I should’ve introduced myself first. I’m Matt, Matthew Sturniolo.” He speaks again.
My eyes widen as my face lights up.
“Oh shit! Matt? Oh my god! I-it’s been so long! Sorry, it’s me, Y/n! From high school!” I shout and hop off my chair suddenly shrinking as I get off my chair.
His face turns as he smiles brightly at me. “Oh my god! Y/n! I didn’t even recognize you! How are you?!” He asks as he goes in for a hug. “I’ve been great! I started my own channel and it was successful! How about you!” I reply as I accept the hug and stay there for a moment then pull away.
He holds me by the waist as my arms are still around his neck. “Same! Me, Nick, and Chris also started a channel and got a lot of love!” He shouts over the music. I smile as my eyes trail around his face now that he was up close.
I could still see the same nerdy Matt from high school. Just different.
My eyes look to his lips, they were plump and pink. They looked so soft.
Since he was closer, I could really see his defined face shape. His cheekbones and jaw line.
I move my hand to touch his face my fingers following his cheekbones and down to his cheek to rest my palm there.
He just smiles and melts at my touch. He looks in my eyes as his pushes his face further in my hand.
“Let’s go somewhere more quiet and catch up, yeah?” Matt says breaking me from the trance he put me in. I nod as I turn to Amelia who was to distracted by her phone to notice Matt. I tell her I’ll be back and walk off with Matt. He brings me outside to the parking lot and to his car.
“I thought we could talk out here since it was a little muggy and hot in there.” He smiles down at me.
I smile up at him and nod. He leans against the car door as I do the same beside him. “You look….different.” I break the silence. He looks over at me. “In a good way or…” Matt asks.
“Yes! Of course! You look amazing, Matt!” I say as I turn my whole body towards him. He just laughs at my reaction. “Thanks, you look great too.” He smiles softly to which I return.
Matt inhales roughly before speaking.
“You know, in high school I had a huge crush on you. So much that I would write about you everyday.” Matt confessed. I chuckle and look down at our feet.
It was nice to be in his presence again.
“I had a huge crush on you too, you knew that, right?” I look back up at him. “I’m pretty sure I figured out by that kiss we shared at graduation.” He smiles. I feel my face flush as I look away. I totally forgot about that.
“Y’know, my feelings for you never changed after all these years. I always wanted you and only you, it broke my heart when you left without a word.” Matt says the energy changing from happy to sad. “I guess we’re confessing now, huh?” I look at him. He just stares at me blankly. I inhale.
“Well, my feelings for you always will forever remain the same even if we are a 6 hour plane ride away from each other or a 15 minute car ride. I’ll always choose you no matter what.” I can’t help but smile after my confession staring in his eyes.
Matt stares at me in awe before he leans in and presses his lips to mine.
I get that same feeling again, the one I had at graduation. I’m taken a back a moment before I lean to kiss him back wrapping my arms around his neck. He sneaks his arms around my waist and continues to kiss me.
We’re in the same position, 3 years later.
The longer we kiss, the more intimate it gets. Matt grips my ass and hips as he pulls my whole body against his. He was way taller than me which made it harder to kiss him.
I had to get on my toes and he had to bend down to kiss me. But it didn’t matter, all I wanted was to feel his lips on mine again.
Matt pins me against the car door and presses his whole body on mine assuring I can’t escape. Matt slides his tongue on my bottom lip asking for permission which I quickly granted.
Our tongues fight for dominance but Matt wins and his tongue explores my mouth.
I put one of my hands on his cheek as the other stays around his neck pulling him impossibly closer.
We both pull away for air and I look down at his lips which are red and plump from our previous actions. Matt yanks me off the car door and opens it then throws me inside. Matt wastes no time in crawling right on top of me and slams the door and smashing his lips back on mine. This time the kiss was more aggressive and needy.
I couldn’t help but moan into the kiss as his hands go everywhere around my body.
Matt pulls away to take off his shirt and goes right back in. His hands trail down to my thighs which are revealed because of my dress. Matt pulls away again and swiftly pulls my dress over my head leaving me in only panties and a bra. Matt examines my body for a moment.
“I always knew I chose you for a reason.” He says lowly and kisses me again as he plays with my breasts. Matt’s hands go under me as I arch my back to take off my bra. Matt unclasps my bra and tosses it to the front as his lips trail down my chest and to my nipple.
My hands are tangled in his hair as he nibbles and licks it repeatedly.
After a while, he switches to the other breast and gives it the same attention. His actions only make my noises grow louder.
Matt trails his lips down further to my stomach, lower abdomen, and to the band of my panties. He looks up at me for permission and I quickly nod to impatient to speak. He slowly pulls down my panties to tease me.
“M-matt, please.” I whine. “Be patient.” He growls. “Let me look at you.”
He then takes off my panties and throws it to where my bra landed leaving me completely revealed for him. Matt licks his lips his teeth showing as he did.
Matt blows cold air on me which makes me shudder and let out a quiet moan.
Matt starts kissing down my thighs getting closer and closer but switching to the other thigh every time he was face to face with it. “Matt!” I yell and groan frustrated by him.
Matt chuckles lowly which sends shivers down my spine. “So needy.” Is all he says as he buries his face in my pussy.
I moan loudly at the sudden impact as he works on my clit sucking aggressively. I whimper uncontrollably as Matt works on me.
Just then, Matt’s phone starts to ring.
Matt grabs it without detaching his tongue from me just looking up at his phone as he has it above me.
Matt hands his phone to me. “Y-you want me to answer?” I say as I look at the contact is to notice that it was Chris. “Mhmmph.” Matt hums against me which sends vibrations through my body.
I press answer and put it on speaker. “Matt where the fuck are you? you wondered off like 20 minutes ago and never came back. Nick and I are getting tired and wanna go home.” Chris says angrily.
“H-hey Chris-“ I say trying to make it sound like his brothers face wasn’t buried in between my legs. “Who is this? wait. y/n? I thought I recognized your voice! why do you have Matt’s phone?” I was about to respond when Matt flattens his tongue and moves his head side to side aggressively.
My back arches as my mouth falls open silent moans leaving it.
“Umm. hello?”
“ye-ah?”
“why do you have Matt’s phone?”
“mmph”
“hello?”
“Matt and I-I! came outside to talk and he went to use the bathroom r-really q-quick and left his phone-ah!” I cover my mouth and smack Matt’s head as he laughs against me.
“Are you okay? what happened?” Chris asks. “Nothing! I’m fine! I-just-uh- hit my finger.” I say in a hushed voice.
“o-kay?-“ Chris is cut off my Matt’s muffled laughter his mouth still attached to me. “Was that Matt? Put him on!” Chris shouts. Matt snatches the phone and hangs up.
Matt drops the phone on the floor and continues. “You taste amazing.” Matt says pulling away for a split second.
My hands go back to his hair as Matt sucks my bud and wraps his hands around my thighs. My eyes roll back as my back arches farther.
Matt inserts one finger, the move taking me by surprise which makes me let out a pornagraphic moan. He starts pumping in and out slowly as his mouth still worked on me.
He inserts another finger and goes faster. I’m a moaning mess as he curls his fingers expertly hitting my g-spot. My moans grow impossibly louder the more he hits that spot.
I feel a knot start to form in my stomach as Matt continues his motions in a faster paste. The knot grows in my lower abdomen and I start clenching around Matt’s fingers.
His fingers were long and slim which made it a perfect fit. I unintentionally start to slightly grind on his face as he moves faster.
He hits that spot again, again, again, again.
The knot grows stronger as Matt looks at me through hooded eyes. My hands stay tangled in his hair.
“I-I’m close.”
“Come on my face, give it to me.”
With his words, I feel myself start to release all over his face with a loud moan.
Matt helps me through my high but doesn’t stop there. He keeps on going even more stronger and aggressive. I couldn’t take it, it was too much.
I try to push him off but he grabs my hands and holds them in a ball. “I’ll stop when I want to, you taste to good.” Matt speaks lowly. I moan uncontrollably as Matt continues his actions.
“M-matt! please! s-stop! I’m sensitive!” I scream and squirm.
“Just a little longer.”
I practically scream with the loud moan I let out. That familiar knot builds in my stomach again. I grow louder as he continues to suck and shake his head. Without saying a word, I come on his face again.
Matt licks up all my liquids and comes up to my face wiping his cheeks with the back of his hands.
“Wasn’t to bad, huh?” Matt says as he kisses me making me tastes myself. I kiss him back as Matt unbuckles his pants and slides down his boxers. We both pull away as I look down at him.
My jaw falls slack. His tip is an angry red leaking with precum.
Matt laughs as he grabs the base and strokes himself a few times. “Tell me if you want me to stop, I will.” Matt says quietly and starts to push himself in stretching my walls.
I bite my lip to muffle my moans as my hands go around to Matt’s back my nails digging into his skin. I whimper once he’s completely in, he pauses to let me adjust.
“Y-you can move now.” I say.
As the words left my mouth, Matt starts to thrust at an ungodly paste making the whole car shake and creak. Little grunts leave Matt’s mouth as loud moans and whimpers leave mine. My nails dig deeper into Matt’s skin as Matt continues to pound me.
“Look at you, taking me so well.” Matt says in my ear. I just look in his eyes with my mouth open.
Just when I thought he couldn’t go faster, he started to move at an inhumane speed. Matt was fucking me so well I couldn’t think straight. My eyes rolled to the back of my head as he moved.
“Look at me or I’ll stop.” Matt says.
My eyes snap back to his fighting not to squeeze them closed. Matt goes so deep that he hits my cervix which makes me go crazy.
I’m screaming so loud I’m pretty sure anyone around us could’ve heard us. “I love hearing your pretty little noises.” Matt speaks again. The knot starts to build up again, but this time more stronger and vivid, and satisfying.
I start to clench around Matt as he grips my breast with one of his hands watching them bounce with every movement.
“I can feel you clenching, c’mon. Come all over me baby.” Matt teases and smiles.
Matt reaches his hands down to rub my clit which only makes my nails dig deeper in his back leaving deep red scratches, some even bleeding.
I feel Matt’s dick start to twitch in me as I start to release. I feel myself squirting all over Matt and his lower stomach.
Matt follows soon after me burying his load deep inside me. Matt collapsed on me his head buried in the crook of my neck. We both breathe heavily as I hug Matt close. “I swear to god I can’t feel my legs.” I say in between breathes. Matt laughs at my statement and gets up to reach for his clothes and mine. It’s only then I see his back and what I did to him.
“Oh shit, Matt. I fucked up your back.” I say and breathe out a laugh. “Fucked it up? No baby, you made it a piece of artwork.” Matt says as he pulls up his pants and boxers and leans in to kiss my forehead. Matt reaches in the console for a napkin to wipe my legs and his stomach and our sweat.
He reaches over to grab my dress and bra stuffing my panties in his pocket.
“You alright?” Matt asks as he slides on his shirt. “Besides not being able to walk properly, yeah I’m fine.” I say and pull on my dress.
Matt laughs and pulls me close to kiss me.
“So what now?” I ask.
“Let me take you on a date.” Matt replies.
I giggle as Matt pulls me in again and kisses me passionately this time.
“When I first saw you, I always thought you were the most beautiful girl in the world.” Matt smiles softly.
I smile as well.
“I always felt the same, I guess it was love at first sight.” I chuckle. So does Matt.
The door suddenly opens and we’re met with Nick’s angry and tired face. “What the fuck! There you are! Y/n? What? I’m so confused?!” Nick screams. Chris comes up behind him and sees us.
Chris doesn’t even seemed shocked. “So this is why you were acting weird on the phone?” Chris says blankly as Matt and I burst into laughter.
“I’ll let you to settle this, c’mon Chris.” Nick tugs Chris and they walk away.
“Y’ know I really love you, a lot, right?” Matt says.
I nod. “Yeah, but I love you more.” I smile. Matt smiles and presses his lips to mine. I guess it really was love at first sight.
——————————
a/n: hey guys!!!!!! this is long asf ik. but i hope u guys like it tell me what you think!
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fanwarriorfictions · 4 days
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Not Again - Part Twelve
Summary: Y/n is desperate to save her mate, they keep telling her he will be fine, but she knows something is wrong
Warnings: ANGSTY!!!! Madja is a good healer I swear, it’s solely for the plot
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-Part Twelve-
Wake up, please wake up. Faint, desperate words in his mind. Not his shadows, the voice was female, with a soft, swirling accent like the mountain breeze running through his hair. There’s a feeling, like this female is everything, that he needs to get to her, to tell her something. Fight, Az, come back.
He tried, so hard, it hurt to much.
Mate, mate, mate.
The word beats in her head in time with his heart. She could feel it, beating in time with her own, across the bridge between their souls, the shadowy tether that she could feel like another limb connecting them.
Mate, mate, mate.
Azriel was her mate, this male, laying before her, thick bandages wrapped over the wound on his chest from the arrow he took because of her. Because of a broken goddess, because she knew the anger, the ferocity caused by a mate being hurt, would unlock that fire in Y/n, Mala’s own power, the only thing strong enough to finally kill her. Her mother had only a drop of it left, Y/n had inherited a deep well of it, deeper than she thought she had, a final gift from Mala.
Amren theorized that Deanna had opened the gate that brought Y/n to them. That she was trying to bring Y/n to whatever world she’d been trapped in, to use the power in her veins to gift her the death she desired, but something happened when the gate opened, the bond between her and Azriel had altered her course, had brought her to him. A gift from the Wyrd, to find her mate all the way across the stars.
Mate, mate, mate.
The gate Y/n had opened had been hijacked by Deanna before it could find Terrasen, and the goddess was able to take the Walking Dead and open her own gate. Amren assumed that, without Deanna’s interference, the gate would work as it should, that they would be able to try it again. She could go home now, could see her parents, her family, Terrasen.
Mate, mate, mate.
It had been nearly a week, since Deanna, since that arrow had pierced Azriel’s chest and she had felt that mating bond between them. Felt it thin as his heart slowed in his chest. It had felt like she was dying with him. A healer, Madja, had tried to lay her hands on him, Y/n had been so deep in a furious red haze that she almost burned the female alive. A red shield had surrounded her as Cassian had ripped her away, she’d almost killed him too, Madja had to heal the burns left on his arms. Feyre had been the one to finally calm her down, arms covered in cold water so she could hold onto Y/n’s scorching skin.
“He’s okay!” She had screamed, when the water had started to boil. “She’s healing him, Y/n look! It missed his heart, he’s okay!”
Y/n had watched the arrow clatter to the floor, the blood coating it, and the wound slowly stitching together beneath the healer’s hands. Feyre let her go, only when Y/n had gone practically limp in her arms. She’d crumbled to the floor, no longer supported by the High Lady, and she crawled towards him, laid down beside him, and pulled on that bond, refusing to let him go.
A week had passed, and she hadn’t attempted to open a gate, to go home, she’d barely even left his room. She couldn’t, not when he was still asleep, not when this bond in her chest was the only indication that he was still alive. Would she still feel it if she left? Will it feel like when he’d almost died, that thinning, that pain, that fear? The thought was so terrifying, so painful, she couldn’t even attempt it, wouldn’t step in that room that still smelled of his blood.
Wake up, shadowsinger, please.
He didn’t.
The inner court checked on her and Azriel periodically, rotating through, Rhys, Feyre, Cassian, Mor, Nesta, Elain, Lucien, over and over again. Even Amren had visited a few times, she’d been the one to finally drag her to the dining room to eat with the rest of the court.
“You can come back and wallow in your misery after you eat, girl.”
Amren didn’t practice kindness, not in the way many would. Forcing her out of that room, quite literally dragging her down the hall, was her form of being kind, of reaching out to make sure Y/n was okay. She wasn’t, she was far from okay, but she let the tiny female force her into her seat, met the concerned eyes of each of the court members, and ate whatever the house forced onto her plate.
“He’ll be okay,” Cassian says gently, his own voice weighed down by his concern for his brother, “Madja has healed worse injuries, he’s had worse.”
She didn’t want to know what those injuries were, “I know.”
“Y/n-“
“How long did you all know,” she cuts him off, looking between each of them, “That he and I were mates? I’m assuming you all know.”
A few of them had the decency to look ashamed. Feyre especially, who gives her mate a hard stare, no doubt speaking to him in his mind. By the way he winces, Y/n assumes it’s not a pleasant conversation.
“After the fight you two had,” Rhys starts, “I had Amren ask the Book of Breathings for more answers, she wrung the information out of it. I told Azriel what it had said, I left it to him on how to tell you.”
After their fight, when he’d disappeared for hours and hours, when she’d felt so lost and miserable, an echo of how he felt. He’d come back, had known exactly how awful she was feeling, called her a coward.
“I wanted to tell you,” Feyre says, glaring at her family around her, “I know how awful it is to be left in the dark-“
“He should have told me,” Y/n says, no heat, no anger, “Azriel should have told me.”
Cassian winces at the cold emptiness in her voice, “He wanted to, but he didn’t want to burden you with it, to hold you back from getting home.”
“He should have told me,” she says again, voice so cold, “He doesn’t get to call me a coward, while he was hiding this.”
“Y/n,” Mor’s gentle voice, “He didn’t want to hurt you.”
Of course he didn’t, that’s not why she was upset. She knew that Azriel cared about her, cared enough that he would suffer beneath the weight of this mating bond alone so she wouldn’t have to. He would take an arrow for her, again and again, and that was terrifying, that he would die for her without ever telling her why. That he would die and leave her behind knowing that she lost the mate she hadn’t even known she’d had.
Y/n stands, ignoring the pity in their eyes, the understanding in the eyes of the High Lady’s, the anger on her behalf from Nesta, the disappointment from Amren. She didn’t want any of it, any of them, she wanted her mother, her father, her family. More than anything, she wanted Azriel.
Days passed, Azriel kept sleeping. Something was wrong, so unbelievably wrong, he should have woken by now, he’d been asleep to long. Y/n couldn’t do anything, the panic pressing down like the mountain had crumbled around her, pinning her beneath the red stone. She yanked on that bond, begging and yelling for him to, wake up, wake up, please, Az, wake up.
Nothing, just that faint steady presence of his heartbeat, the bridge of shadows dark on his side like he couldn’t even dream in his sleep.
Madja looked him over, changing his bandages, she found nothing wrong, he just needed rest. That’s what they all kept telling her, he’ll be okay, Y/n, he needs to rest.
She wanted to scream, to burn the next fae that told her he was okay, he wasn’t, something was wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong.
Please, Azriel, I need you to wake up.
He wanted to tell her something, needed to tell her something. He tried so hard to wake, to reach for her, but he couldn’t.
I’m here, Princess. I’m here.
“Help,” she’s screaming, “Help, please! Cassian!”
Azriel’s body violently shakes beneath her hands, his skin hot and coated in sweat. She’d woken to his limbs colliding with her own, part of her had thought he’d woken up, but when she’d shot up, seen his eyes still closed, felt the intense pain coming from him down the bond, she screamed and screamed for help.
A seizure, he was having a seizure. She’d spent time in the southern continent, at the torre with her aunt. Learning the basics of healing because she was fascinated with it as a young teenager. There had been a man who was yelling for help, his wife had collapsed in the street and she was shaking. The healers had helped her, her aunt had described the situation as a seizure, told her what to do. She knew what to do, but in this moment she was panicking to much to do it.
The door slams open, Cassian running, dagger in hand, “Mother above.”
“Get the healer,” she screams, “Get Rhys, Feyre, anyone, please!”
That far away look in his eyes, “They’re on their way, just hold on.”
“Help me turn him on his side,” Y/n pleads, forcing herself to breathe, to do what her aunt had instructed her to do.
Cassian rushes to her, helping her haul his brother up and onto his side, “How long has he been like this?”
“I don’t know, a few minutes maybe,” she says, “Where’s Madja?”
“Almost here,” he answers, that look in his eye, “Rhys is flying them up now.”
Y/n gently holds Azriel, his shaking form beneath her palms, whispering down that shadowy bridge between them, You’re okay, it’s going to be okay, it’s okay.
She didn’t believe herself at all. Not even when the seizure subsided, not when Madja had arrived with a frantic Rhys in tow, not when she checked him over and found nothing outwardly wrong with him.
“All we can do is wait,” Madja says, laying a gentle hand on Y/n’s shoulder, before leaving with Rhys and Cassian.
She couldn’t wait anymore.
The room is pitch black, the moon and stars covered by clouds in the sky, the only light comes from the small candle in her hand. It still smells of his blood, the whole room reeks of it, his combining with her own.
The cut on her arm was a dull ache, barely noticeable beneath the pain and fear in her heart. Her blood was warm on her fingertips, she pressed them to the floor and drew, drew the symbols she’d memorized, drew the name she had learned as a child, one of many.
Her voice sounded hallow in her ears, the painful words tearing through her vocal chords. The blood turns green, casting the room in its sickly light. Her hands shook as she finished, wide eyes staring into the darkness.
“What is that?”
She almost sobs at the voice, at the woman who comes into view, peering into the gate. The only person she could think of that would know what to do, to save him.
“Yrene,” her voice broke as the woman’s eyes landed on her, “I need your help.”
“Oh gods,” her aunt sobs loudly, “Y/n, my darling girl where have you-“
The door behind her aunt flies open, a man as familiar as her own father running through, sword raised to protect his wife, “What is it? What’s wrong-”
He spots the gate, sliding to a stop, “Y/n? My gods-“
“Please,” Y/n sobs, “I need help, please something is wrong, he won’t wake up, a seizure, he can’t, I can’t-“
“Y/n slow down,” Chaol lowers his sword, “Sweetheart breathe, calm down, who’s hurt, where are you?”
“Yrene please, he needs your help,” Y/n begs, she falls to her knees, her hands raised over her head, palms up, “Please, help him.”
There’s a shift in the air as Yrene steps through the gate, Y/n sobs when her aunt’s hands grasp her own. Yrene pulls Y/n to her feet, supporting her weight. Behind her, Chaol takes a step towards them but Yrene shakes her head.
“Get Aelin and Rowan,” she commands.
Chaol looks ready to argue, but a sharp look from his wife has him nodding once, “Be careful, my love”
“Where is he?”
Y/n runs, forcing herself to slow down, to keep pace with Yrene’s human form. She follows that bond, pulling on it, feeling the heartbeat on the other side and nothing more. It was like Azriel was barely there, blocked, hidden from her.
She felt then, a rumbling power, night kissed darkness. Rhys was coming, he’d felt the portal open no doubt, she didn’t care to stop, to explain to him what she had done. He could wait, Azriel couldn’t.
The door to his room is wide open, the house already knew what was happening, the room lit by fae lights. Yrene didn’t hesitate, just ran to the bed, to Azriel.
“What happened?”
It was a struggle to keep calm long enough to briefly describe what had happened, that he’d been shot in the chest by the goddess Deanna, that he’d been in a coma ever since. Yrene lays her hands over Azriel’s chest, faint warm light glowing from her palms. Her magic searching, washing over him and into that wound beneath his bandages.
“What is this?” That night kissed power explodes into the room, “Get your hands off my brother!”
Y/n throws herself in his path, a cold harsh wind blowing him back, “Rhys stop! She’s helping him, this is my aunt, I told you about her.”
“You opened a gate? Alone?” His voice is scathing, “What if something had happened again? You almost died last time! Damnit Y/n, you could have asked-”
“I needed to do something, I couldn’t keep waiting,” she snaps, her voice breaking, “Rhys I can’t- I can’t lose him.”
The anger in Rhys shatters, “I know, Y/n, I know, me too.”
“I don’t know what’s going on over there,” Yrene calls out, “But I could use some help.”
Y/n turns from Rhys, offering no translation, “What? what is it?”
“There’s something here,” Yrene says, hand hovering over the bandages, “Magic, it’s old, older than the valg. It feels similar though, to what was paralyzing your uncle, it’s attached to his heart.”
“What can I do?”
“Hold him down,” she says, “Get the angry one to help, this is probably going to hurt really bad.”
“Rhys,” Y/n throws over her shoulder, “Help me hold him down.”
The High Lord does without hesitation, “What’s wrong with him? What is she doing?”
Almost in response, Azriel screams. Arching off the bed, wings flaring beneath him, almost knocking Y/n over. Rhys throws his weight over his brothers kicking legs, using some of that power to restrain him. Y/n’s own wind holds Azriel down where she can’t reach, keeping his arm from swinging into Yrene.
His screams are so achingly painful, shouting down the bond between them, the first sign of him she’d had in nearly two weeks.
“You’re okay,” she shushes him, “It’s going to be okay. Just hold on.”
He screams and screams, tears streaming down his cheeks. Y/n can only hold on, can only cry with him. Every feeling is thrown down the bond, like it had been opened like a door between their minds, pain, fear, agony, Y/n could feel it all like it was her own chest, like it was being torn open, like her heart was being ripped out.
“I’ve almost got it,” her aunt says through clenched teeth, “Just a little while longer.”
Hold on, just hold on. She hopes he can hear her, he only screams in response. Roaring loud enough to shake the mountain beneath them. She screams with him, her already hoarse voice shattering, she could taste blood on her tongue.
A bright silver light shines through Yrene’s warm healing glow. It nearly blinds Y/n, she has to squint to see what it even was. Slowly pulling it from Azriel’s chest, it looked almost like a worm made of moon fire, writhing inside a bubble of Yrene’s magic.
Azriel slumps to the bed, breathing hard and fast, his eyes do not open. Y/n collapses against him, cradling his head to her chest, her fingers running through his hair.
“What is that?”
She looks up at Rhys, “One last fuck you from Deanna.”
The magic reeks of the goddess, a shred of her left in it, mocking, laughing. Y/n holds out her hand, and her aunt wordlessly drops the silver thing into her hand. It writhes in her palm, she glares at it, at the final shred of the wretched goddess.
“Go to Hel,” she spits, and her palm lights in the deepest, hottest blue flame, until there’s nothing left.
Wake, wake up, here, she’s here, wake up, tell her, wake up! The voices hurt his head, adding to the pain that radiates through his whole body. It hurt, his head, his chest, his heart, it all hurt.
He couldn’t force his eyes to open, so he relies on his other senses. He was laying down, surrounded by soft pillows and blankets, warm. From the scent surrounding him, he was in his own room, but there was another scent, pine and snow and embers, home. It clung to the pillows beside him, he wants to turn his face into it and inhale deeply. He tries, but the motion causes his already aching head to scream in pain.
“Az?”
That voice, soft and swirling air, the northern breeze that caught in his wings and lifted him high into the sky. It was the most beautiful sound he’d ever heard, her voice, the one he’d heard in his dreams, the one begging him to wake. He had to tell her something, desperately needed to tell her.
“Princess-“ he coughs, his throat felt like sand paper, felt like he had been screaming.
“Here,” she says.
He feels the bed dip beside him, something cold presses to his lips, water. The cold liquid slides over his tongue soothing the pain in his throat. He drinks deeply for several seconds, groaning when she takes the glass away.
“You’ll make yourself sick,” she chides.
He wanted to open his eyes, to see her, to tell her everything, “Princess, I-“
Her hand in his, so right, so perfect, “I know, shadowsinger, I know.”
Azriel finally forces his eyes open, the sunlight shines through the open curtains, settling over her like a blanket of gold. Beautiful, so achingly beautiful. He could feel her, that tether of shadow more like a solid bridge between them.
“You know,” he breathes, “How-“
“You should have told me,” she stops him, her hand shaking in his palm, “Gods, Az, you should have told me. Instead, I watched an arrow go into your chest, I felt you dying on the other side of the bond.”
The words send a shock of pain through his chest, like that arrow was finding home in his heart once again. It echoes the pain she felt, still feels.
“It felt like I was dying with you,” she says, her eyes burning with lingering rage, “I killed her. I didn’t think, couldn’t, I felt that bond in my chest, knew that you were my mate, and she had tried to take you from me. I burned her to nothing but ash.”
Azriel could only stare at the female, she had killed a goddess, an ancient terrible creature, for him. His mate, his viscous warrior of a mate, gods killer.
“You should have told me,” she repeats again, and Azriel can feel the anger and the fear she feels, “You almost died, and I- I didn’t- I couldn’t- You“
“I’m sorry.” The broken words tear into his heart, “I’m so sorry, Princess.”
“I know,” she takes a deep breath, “I know why you hid it, I understand that, I just- I almost lost you before I’d even known I had you.”
Her face falls, looking down at the hands in her lap that fidget with the loose black fabric. Night court black, it almost seemed like mourning black to Azriel.
“Hey.” It takes more effort than he’s willing to admit to lift his scarred hand to her cheek, turning her face back to him, “I’m okay, you still have me, if you still want me.”
Her eyes are lined with silver tears as she nods once, a simple gesture that breaks and rebuilds every part of his soul. He didn’t need some big mating ceremony, didn’t need a party, didn’t need her to offer him food, just that nod, that simple yes, was more than enough.
Despite the pain, Azriel sits up, cradling her face in the palm of his hand, marveling at the sight of her wide eyes, no cold, no heat, just full of wonder. A single tear runs down her cheek and Azriel leans in, kissing away the drop.
“You’re my mate,” he whispers against her skin, it feels like a weight lifting off his shoulders, off his heart, “Mine.”
She pulls back, just enough to look into his eyes and say, “And you are mine.”
Azriel runs his thumb over the apple of her cheek, “My beautiful, wonderful, vicious mate.”
She smiles and he could fall apart completely. He looks down at those lips, soft and sweet, and Azriel kisses his mate, and for once in his life, everything felt right.
Y/n had been the first to pull away from the kiss, so achingly gentle, “You must be starving.”
Azriel’s eyes were firmly locked on her lips as he said, “Yes I am.”
Every instinct in him was roaring to keep kissing her, to do more than that. His mate, gods this was his mate.
“You’ve been asleep for nearly two weeks, you need to eat.”
That gets his attention, his dark brows furrowed, “Two weeks?”
“The others are waiting in the dining room,” she says gently, “We can wait, we’ll go whenever you’re ready, but your family is desperate to see you.”
He’d been asleep for two weeks, they’d be beside themselves with worry, his brothers especially. There’s two voices in his head, one begging to see them, one that remembers that they’d also seen that arrow go into his chest, had watched as he nearly died. The other voice begs him to stay, to lay this female down and claim her in every way he could, his mate.
“You’re still recovering,” Y/n says, hand coming up to rest on the bandages over his chest, “Eat first, see your family. I’m not going anywhere.”
Yet. That unspoken word, she wasn’t going anywhere yet. He wonders if she heard it too, wonders if she could feel his heart squeeze painfully in his chest.
Azriel wants to scream, instead he swallows it down and says, “Food first then.”
Y/n smiles and Azriel memorizes the image of her, tucks it away for later, ignoring the feeling of sand trickling down an hour glass, like their time was running out.
“Here, let me help.” She stands, grabbing a shirt from the wardrobe.
Azriel throws the covers off, feeling the sore and stiff muscles throughout his body. He forces himself through it, to lift his arms as she pulls the shirt over his head, to breathe as her hands button the shirt beneath his wings. Each step he takes feels like fire lancing through him, he doesn’t wince, doesn’t complain, only holds onto her hand as she guides them through the halls closer and closer to his family.
“Hold on.” He stops, pulling on her hand just before they turn that final corner, “Give me a second.”
Worried eyes, searching him head to toe, “What is it? What’s wrong? Do you need to sit down?”
Azriel smiles, “I’m alright, Princess.”
“What-“
He doesn’t give her the chance to finish her sentence, his arms wrapping around her waist and tugging her to his chest. The smallest gasp leaves her lips and he breathes it in as his lips find hers. He needed one more kiss, to steady himself, to prepare himself for the overbearing love and care from his family.
Y/n holds tightly to his shirt, “Az.”
He squeezes her hips, his name on her tongue was one of his favorite sounds. He hums against her lips, memorizing the feel of this too.
“Az I need to tell you-“
It could wait, everything could wait. He needed her now, who knew how much time he had left with her. He kisses her like he was trying to steal the air from her lungs, so entwined with her, with the feeling of her mouth, of her hands, of her body, his defenses down. Not even his shadows warned him.
A blade pressed between his shoulders, between his wings, the sharp tip digging in just enough to sting, and a lethally calm voice, “I recommend you take your hands off my daughter.”
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doki-doki-imagines · 4 months
Note
Not sure if you take requests but could you write about Shang Tsung (and others) with breeding kink?🙏
feat. Shang Tsung, Bi-Han, Liu Kang, Syzoth (aka the guy I think would be into it)
tw: smut, afab!reader
author note: requests are open! It's been a while since I wrote smut, I hope you'll like these.
Shang Tsung: -He is staining your soul, putting his seed of evil into you. -The thought gives him goosebumps, his right hand keeping your leg up and open wide, while to other play with your nipple and at the same time pushes your back against his front. -The hand that way playing with your chest slides lower, now drawing patterns on your tummy that in a few month will be round and full. -Shang Tsung bites his lower lip, and close tight his eyes, it's a sinful thought that is bringing him too fast to the end. -"Let me cum inside, you want it too right? You always tell me, don't you remember?" He whispers into your ear, voice weavering at each of his thrust in your core. -You seriously don't remember ever telling him that, but you nod, too fucked, too lost in the throes of pleasure to formulate a coherent thought. -"I knew it, you will be an excellent brood mare." He smirks, wide and wicked. -Shang Tsung almost hope he didn't impregnate you this time, the idea so good he wants to try again and again. -Not that he will stop anyway…
Bi-Han: -He is the Grandmaster, you know? He needs heirs! -But Bi-Han isn't doing this to follow orders, his eyes liquid lust while looking at your soft body, phrases way too broken and badly formulated to be of a man following his duty. -"I'll make you full of my cum, I'll fuck you so good-" The sudden grip of your core make Bi-Han stops in his track, lost in the pleasure of your pussy suiting his cock like a glove. -It's not like you are doing any better, legs up his shoulders, hands scratching his biceps the only stable thing to keep you anchored to this moment, mind wandering in the sea of bliss at each of his hard thrusts. -Bi-Han can't stop thinking of your chest, filled to the brim with milk, soft and round begging to be touched, nipples hard desperate for some attention, tummy full of yours and his child. -His mind plays a dirty trick and he cums with just one last thrust, falling on top of you, groaning into your neck, while he fills you with his cum. -"Keep it all in, don't make a single drop fall."
Liu Kang: -He waited his entire life to be in peace and in love. Now it's time to step up the game. -The idea of you carrying his baby, your entire body glowing of happiness make his brain vessels close really fast, blood flowing to his crotch pathetically fast. -That's why now you are on your hands and knees, taking him like a champ, his thrusts hard and fast, the fat of your ass red from the slaps you counted a minute ago, the sound you are both making obscenely lewd. -Liu Kang isn't a gentleman. He is a man with a goal that he needs to accomplish if he doesn't want to become crazy. -Something that you already are, tears running down your face, drool escaping your open mouth, moans escaping freely. -"Please, lemme cum-" You sob "I've been good." You gasp out. -Liu Kang whines after hearing your voice. You always sound so good, and he is too weak to you. -"Take it all, my darling, you can do it. I know it." He prompts you on, close to the end himself. -And you do, not even a sound escapes your mouth, too tired and desperate, total opposite of Liu Kang whom cum into you, an high pitched moan blessing your ears. -You lay down, knees and arms weak after the intense session, trying to stabilise your breath, while your lover stay behind you, pulling out and admiring his work. -Liu Kang notices some cum rolling down your core, so he scoop it up with his index and middle finger to plunge it inside you again, earning him a whine. -"Don't waste any of it, keep it inside. It's holy, you know?"
Syzoth: -He gets a bit insane thinking of you having his kids, honestly. -That's why for the longest time, Syzoth won't say anything and keep this thought for himself, ashamed you may get scared. -But then he finds out you share his kink and his wall drop. But he'll ask to repeat yourself because Syzoth thinks his intrusive thought pulled a bad joke on him. -Syzoth prefers to enjoy his kink when he isn't in "heat", when his mind is a bit more stable and he can control himself a bit more. You tell him he is fine either way, but please respect his decision one step at a time. -Doesn't mean Syzoth won't rock your world anyway; you should know how hot your shy boy is. -Syzoth would bite your neck, tell him if he is being too rough, he may not be in "heat," but the blood isn't pumping only in his brain right now. -Don't tap out! For lizards, it means you are being submissive, and it is like an okay sign to keep going, Syzoth didn't agree on a safe word with you just for fun. -"You are so fucking big-" You turn your head back as best as you can, face still pushed into the mattress, voice almost a little whine "Fill me up, please cum inside!" -Syzoth doesn't have to mind to reply, but he understands enough to act, filling you to the brim, the idea of your full tummy and soft glow the last push he needed.
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yo-yo-yungi · 3 months
Text
FUCK, BOY - PARK SEONGHWA - NSFW
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Seonghwa x AFAB!reader
Genre: smut
Warning list: Fuckboy!seonghwa, Virgin!reader, dom!seonghwa, sub!reader, established relationship, fingering, pet names (sweetheart, darling, pretty, baby), degrading (slut), let me know if i missed anything!, not proof read
Word count: 1,393
Summary: Your boyfriend was a fuckboy, so why won’t he just fuck you already? Are you too gross, too ugly? It’s time to find out…
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He was a fuck boy, past tense, was. Now he'd landed himself dating you, the girl who is known for being a virgin.
He was hot, and would fuck anyone whenever he wanted. You were gorgeous, but wouldn't let a soul even touch you, until you met each other...
You were complete opposites when you looked at the surface, but once you dove past stereotypes and reputation you discovered that Seonghwa liked all the small things you did, you were perfect together.
You both felt honoured to have broken the others "norms" but... you'd be lying if you didn't feel like you had to give yourself to Seonghwa now. He slept whit everyone, but he hadn't even tried to sleep with you, he was taking things slow.
That only left a bitter feeling eating away at your belly. Are you not pretty enough for Seonghwa? Are you not good enough for him to want to wet his dick?
Gritting your teeth you set in motion a plan you'd saved for the perfect moment. You'd finally decided you craved Seonghwa, and you needed him to want you back.
- call him over, and have him say he will be there: check.
- Hide the outfit you want to change into in your bathroom : check.
- Once Seonghwa is over, manage to slip away into the bathroom to get changed: check.
- Once in the outfit, seduce and fuck that man: in progress.
Now in your sexy outfit you hesitated, you were flustered. Your body burned red with pure embarrassment. What if Seonghwa thought you were ugly? What if he was just dared to date you? No, no, Seonghwa seems honest with you....
Looking in the mirror you saw the sexy lace bralette decorating your skin, the matching fingerless gloves coming far up your arms. Strapy little panties showing off your perfect body, Thigh high socks digging into your plush thighs, stiletto heels making you seem intimidating, you were anything but. You were positively shaking at the thought of trying to seduce your boyfriend, who had been with a variety of sexier girls, you stood no chance…
A knock sounded on the door "sweetheart are you okay. I could hear lots of shuffling and now you are silent, please don't be dead" he joked, and that sent a smile onto your face. He always made you smile.
"No No Hwa, I'm okay. Just sit back down I'll be out in a second" you giggled. He shot back agreement and waited, lazily looking at his phone as he waited for you.
It took you another minute but you eventually opened the door, and before he could even look up, you were sat on the edge of the bed, back turnt to him, eyes glued to the wall.
He hummed, and the sound of him shuffling behind you reached your ears. He leant up on his arms head peeping over your shoulder as he gazed over you, and you swore you heard a small groan slip from his lips.
As the idea of standing up and leaving danced through your mind, you felt one of his hands gently climb up your arm and rest on your shoulder, fingers lightly tapping at your skin. "You do this for me darling?" He slurs, voice slightly deeper than before. He sounded so fucking hot, but you couldn't bring yourself to turn around.
You hummed and he smirked, you could hear it in the way he spoke. "And what do you want from me?" He teased. He sat up further and his other hand dragged up to the other shoulder, both hands now rubbing at your shoulders.
You didn't answer him, you were too busy looking at your hands. One of his hands strayed from its place on your shoulder and grasped your cheek ever so gently and turnt your face towards his. As you looked at him you saw the pure desire in his eyes, he was absolutely hungry.
His hand slipped to the back of your neck and he grabbed lightly. His other hand slipped onto your lips, rubbing your pretty lip gloss around with a chuckle "so fucking pretty, aren't you baby?" He groans. His eyes flick away from your lips and up to your eyes, clearly expecting an answer. He shoved two of his fingers into your mouth and the pure lewd expression you gave him in return made his dick throb. You nodded, desperately trying to get your message across as you licked his fingers.
Releasing his fingers from your pretty lips with a pop, he leaned in towards you. The gap between your lips almost minuscule. "Do you actually want this darling? You don't have to do anything if YOU don't want to?" He reminds you.
In return you smile "I really need you Hwa". It comes out so pathetically desperate, and he could imagine you begging like that for years to come.
He leans in, the distance diminishing until your lips joined together in a kiss Seonghwa dominated. He was teaching you, and fuck would you let him. His lips glided against yours perfectly, tongue prodded into your mouth amazingly, moans slipped out so filthy.
He pulled away and stood up, pushing you backwards on the bed and climbing onto you, one knee on the outside of your leg and the other placed firmly on the ground. This is it, he'd ease you into it as carefully as he could when you looked so fucking delicious. He'd hold himself back... as difficult as it was... because he didn't want to break you straight away... you were to precious.
You slowly leant back, using one arm to cover your chest slightly as you realised how much of your cleavage was actually showing. Seonghwa tutted, grasping your arm and pushing it to the bed, setting an unspoken rule, 'don't cover yourself from me'. "My perfect girl..." he whispered eyes locked with your own as he crawled further up you, his other leg now on the other side of your legs, straddling you. Growing nervous you pushed yourself further away from him but he only grew closer.
He chuckled at you as you stilled "stop running darling, I promise I'll make you feel good. Just tell me if you want to stop and I will". He leant down and placed a sweet kiss to your lips then looked down at your chest. He used one hand to hold him up and the other to trace between your tits, watching as his finger got consumed by your cleavage. He ran his fingers over your tit then grasped it, squishing your nipple perfect with his thumb as he grabbed. You let out a small moan at the feeling, surprised he simply knew where your nipple was through your bra. He slid his hand over and did the same to the other tit, then ran his hand downwards to your stomach.
You began to sit up at the loss of contact and he only pushed you back and begun kissing your neck. He bit and sucked on your supple skin, knowingly leaving pretty pink marks that will remind you off him. His hand continued to run down until he got to your clothed cunt. Two fingers skilfully rubbed circles against your clit, getting you squirming and moaning as he continued to mark you.
He slipped your panties to the side and ran his fingers through your desire, absolutely coating his fingers. "Such a wet cunt~ all this for me sweetheart? Do you like being touched that much?" He teased.
You moaned out a small yes, learning to respond to him by now.
He chuckled at your desperation "awww such a slut. Tell me you're a slut baby. Tell me you're a slut all for me!" He groans in your ear, pulling back to look at you as you say it.
You whine "yours- I'm your slut Hwa... fuck. Please just fuck me".
Seonghwa was not ready to hear your beg like that, he'd imagined it sure, but hearing it was different. You were just too fucking perfect. "That's right, my slut" he whispered, then went back to kissing your neck. His fingers slipped into your begging hole, curling to hit the parts not even you knew you had until Seonghwa touched you like that. He really was good at this, a fucking sex god.
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historiaxvanserra · 4 months
Text
Whatever Our Souls Are Made Of | Chapter 3
Pairing: SingleDad!Rhys x Reader
Summary: A few weeks since making your bargain with the High Lord and he seems to be slipping into a deep sadness and his absence is keenly felt. Nyx has a fever and Rhysand is nowhere to be seen.
Word Count: 3.1k
Warnings: allusions to sexual assault, allusions to depression, abandonment, broken homes (y'know keeping it light, in all seriousness this is not all angst it's quite sweet actually).
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Dreaming comes as easy as breathing there in the darkness of the High Lords townhouse. Hewn City is a dark metropolis; all shadowed emerald light and a cruel chill that seeps into the empty parts of you. You dream shapeless dreams, all plumes of jade light and the cruel laugh of your father as he utters your name like a curse. 
A pitiful cry cuts through the echoing antechamber of The Moonstone Palace. A much too tangible thing to be the shadow of a long repressed memory. Another sob bleeds into a wail and your body comes back to consciousness with all the force of a raging tempest. 
Nyx. 
Instincts you thought had died under that mountain seem to rouse you from your state of misty wakefulness. The dream slips away from you once more and in its place, sunlight -- radiant and topaz as it ribbons into your room -- and shaded by the canopy of cypress trees that flutters against your window in the balmy summer breeze. 
The air in the nursery smells like moondust and lavender as you enter and the room is shaded in shadows, a darkness so deep that it arches on oppressive and the heat almost feverish. You can vaguely make out the figure of Nyx in his cradle and as you cross the threshold into the nursery his wails seem to dissolve into mournful little sobs that seem to you almost as rehearsed as his fathers arrogant front that he wears so well. Beneath it all there is a fragility there, in the truth that lies in the darks of the High Lords eyes. The same is true of his son as he casts his deep sapphire eyes, brimming with silver tears, towards you in a plea for comfort. 
“Good morning, little bat,” You whisper gently at the infant, languidly stroking the dark onyx curls away from his face and catching his errant tears with the pad of your thumb. Even in the darkness of the nursery you see the deep crimson that colors his chubby cheeks and the bridge of his nose and you can feel the heat coming off him in cruel plumes as he continues to let out broken little sobs. It is almost painful to watch him in his pitiful mood with his ruddy cheeks and dark eyes.
“Oh my darling! are you unwell?” Nyx only sniffles in response, as his chubby fist finds purchase on the neckline of your nightdress and drawing you closer to him. Taking him into your arms you move towards the windows. The wave of fresh citrusy air is a welcome break in the feverish heat of the nursery and the celestial topaz light reveals Nyx to you more clearly. His hair is the same shade of blue-black as his fathers, and his eyes are a deep, captivating sapphire that shine with the same mirth you’d seen in Rhysands violet eyes. The tips of his pointed ears and nose are flushed a deep scarlet and the hue of his golden skin seems almost pallid in the morning light. Pressing a kiss to his forehead has him burrowing further into your chest seeking comfort and giving you a sleep addled, gummy smile as his broken sobs dissolve into deep and chesty snores as you descend into the lower levels of the house in search of his father. 
“Let’s go find your daddy, shall we?” you murmur against Nyx’s messy curls. 
The house seems to be steeped in a solemn silence as you reach the foyer and round the corner into the large sitting room. There’s a chill in the stagnant air and the room, usually stained in Rhys's distinct scent, is eerily devoid of his presence. It’s been the same for the last few weeks. At first Rhys had been a constant, if not outrageously over protective, presence in the townhouse but as the weeks wear on its as though he is surrendering himself to the darkness that seems to attend him these days. Allowing himself to sink into the vast and starless abyss where no light can reach him. The High Lord you knew in those first weeks seems like a distant memory now; now, he walks these halls like a half-formed ghost in the night, and by morning he is gone. Leaving only the smell of jasmine and mandarin in his wake. Rhysand no longer seems to find no joy in his family, or the son that is a constant reminder of his lost love, and you, once an easy distraction, has become another burden that he avoids like the plague. It wouldn’t be so bad, you think, should he find it in himself to visit his son for more than the mere minutes before he finds rest in the evening. But these days he works too much and drinks more still. So much so that the air in the townhouse around his private rooms has begun to smell more of the woody whiskey that he drinks than his own unique blend of jasmine and citrus that intoxicates you night and day. 
What’s worse still is that when you do see him it is when the house is cloaked in shadow and you seek him out only for him to bury himself under a pile of papers and false compliments as though you and he aren’t one and the same. As though you don’t see his vain attempt at wearing arrogance like some sort of beautiful armor. 
When you look at him now all the light has gone from his violet eyes and he looks like the errant memory of the Male who had been your dark winged savior in Hewn City. His hair is longer and the ends curl away from his pointed ears in haphazard waves and the scruff around his jaw has mutated into an unkempt beard that ages him. 
He looks so much like his father, you think. A thought you’re certain the High Lord wouldn’t care to hear. 
“Rhys?” You call out, though the resounding echo is answer enough. As is in response Nyx seems to huff a frustrated sigh as his dark lashes flutter open in the harsh jade light of the living room. The babes wings twitch and spasm as he becomes fully lucid in your arms and he wriggles defiantly against his swaddling. 
“I suppose it’s just you and me today, little bat,” again, you think, though Nyx only offers you a high-pitched giggle as he points towards the kitchen where he has learned his breakfast waits.
“Let’s get you something to eat, yes?” You say animatedly, taking one of his curled up fists and placing it to your lips and peppering gentle kisses on his soft skin. He smells like lavender soap and moondust but his usual calm scent is tainted with something almost medicinal that speaks to the extent of his illness. Though it has done little to dampen his spirit you think as he finally breaks loose of the satin blanket you had wrapped him in before leaving the nursery. 
“And then maybe we can go into town and get some herbs for that fever, hm?” Though Nyx is much too young to make sense of your words he seems invested enough to mimic the nodding motion you make at him as you place him in the high chair while you move to prepare a selection of mashed fruit that he tastes eagerly. 
When Nyx is finished his breakfast he manages to stay lucid enough for you to get him changed into some little blue overalls with silver embroidered crescent moons along the arm straps and leg cuffs. But just as you’re securing him into the navy sling he seems to drift off into a serene dreamstate with the rhythm of your heartbeat, a strong and steady lullaby as you stroll through the streets of Velaris. 
By the time you and Nyx reach the main square the sun is at its peak in the sky and the world seems painted in the leonine hues of summer in the mountains. Nyx takes it all in with a sense of awe and excitement. The air is crisp and fresh and the smells of the sweet tarts and jams from the bakeries on Crescent Street are undercut by the salty smell of the Sidra as the wind blows westward. The row houses are hung with ivy and honeysuckle and the patrons of the boutiques and antique bookshops on the main square all seem as though they live in a perpetual state of bliss. Velaris truly is a wonder you think as you approach the yawning sage coloured door of Madja’s apothecary. 
“Here we are Nyxie!” You smile brightly at the babe as he squeals and your take his hand in yours and point him towards the sign hung above the apothecary door. The sign is painted gold on a black wooden board that simply reads The Apothecary at Orion Street. 
The door is ornately crafted; painted a muted sage and the glass panes are inlaid with beautiful colors making up the components of an emerald bottle, the likes of which line the shelves and window displays, each labeled in elaborate cursive. A small bell rings melodiously to alert Madja of your presence and as the door closes behind you the smell of wyrmwood and heather is thick in the air. The walls are all painted a deep bottle green and the shelves are stacked with ancient bound books and various concoctions in dark jars and bouquets of dried herbs hang from the high ceiling above the counter. In the dim lights its hard to make out Madja’s hunched figure through the plumes of thick smoke coming from the back of the store. 
“Madja?” You call into the darkened store, stepping further into the apothecary, “Madja? Hello? Anyone back there?”
“Just a second, my dear,” A loud screeching sends you backwards, a cautious hand cradling the baby content in his sling, and from the back room an old woman appears clutching various glass vials and instruments.
Madja stops abruptly and places the contents in her arms down on the counter when she takes in the sight of you; dressed in a simple dress with the heir of The Night Court wrapped around you chest. Her brows draw together and the lines around her mouth deepen as she regards you both with narrow eyes. 
“Is everything alright, girl?” She asks with the faintest hint of alarm, her dull eyes trailing over both you and Nyx as if looking for some injury or illness. “The High Lord is well?”
“It’s Nyx, he has a small fever, is all.” You offer her and her face seems to soften then and she hums lightly retreating into the darkness of the back room again. The sound of her puttering around the small workroom rings sharply through the shop floor as she collects a few glass bottles and salves.
“I thought you’d be able to give him a tonic of some sort for the fever?” You raise your voice above the clatter of glass and utensils until she reamergs from the darkness. When the older woman comes back into view she's got a selection of salves and balms and three bottles of tonic, each filled with a different color liquid. She sets it down on the table and advances towards you with surprising candor and inspects the babe closely, pressing a weathered hand to his cheeks and forehead and inspecting his mouth as he offers her a gummy smile and idle babble. 
In those quiet moments while she is checking the babe over you allow your mind to wander. It does not wander far, flicking to images of the High Lord hunched over his desk and his eyes ringed purple in the silvery lamp light. 
“A small fever,” Madja’s voice is rich and deep as she hums to herself in acknowledgement, patting the babe fondly on his haphazard curls before collecting a small cloth bag and placing a few salves and bottles inside, “the balm is for his gums and the tonic should break the fever.” 
The old woman nods towards the infant as she hands the bag off to you, “he’ll be okay though?” your voice is apprehensive and you realize then the anxiety clawing its way up your throat at the thought of the babe in your arms coming to harm. 
“Yes, he will,” Madja says with a deep sigh, running a hand over her brow “Now is there anything else I can help you with?” You decline and begin to collect the bag heavy with various salves and tonics and turn on your heel to the street when a thought occurs to you.
“You wouldn’t have any sleeping tonics would you?” The clinking of glass is answer enough and Madja adds them to the cloth bag with a questioning look in her dark eyes.
“For the High Lord, he’s been kept very busy as of late.” Madja smiles knowingly and pats you on the shoulder and ushers you to the door, the bell chiming as you cross the threshold into the street. Turning once more back to the apothecary, Madja offers you a wave and shouts out “Tell Rhysand he is under strict instructions to get a good night’s sleep…and a shave!” 
Madja’s laugh is sweet and rich on the midday breeze and you wave her a final farewell before slipping down the avenue that leads you straight back to the Townhouse. 
___________________________________________________________________________
By the time the sun sets over Velaris, Nyx had already had two doses of his tonic. His fever broke sometime after his evening meal and relief floods your heart when you notice the change in his color during bathtime. The babe is lathered in bubbles from his lavender soap and he’s giggling happily and babbling to his rubber bat toys as you run a washcloth over his cherub cheeks that are stained with the delicious remnants of the cherry pastries you had bought from a bakery on the way home. It’s then you notice that the blush tinting his cheeks is a light coral instead of the deep scarlet that had graced his sweet face earlier that morning. 
Nyx splashes giddily as you tap his nose and laugh animatedly at him, “Someone’s feeling better! Aren't you, little bat?”
“I heard he gave you quite the scare this morning,” It’s Rhysand’s voice, a low velvet tenor that sounds so beautiful as it hits your ears. 
He’s learning against the frame of the bathroom door wearing his signature lazy smile though you can tell from the redness around his dark violet eyes that he hasn’t slept well. His hair is pushed back from his face though the longer strands frame his chiseled face quite beautifully, you must admit. Though the coarse hair that has grown in around his jawline does nothing for the delicate slope of his nose nor the sharp line of his jaw. He’s since shed his suit jacket and the sleeves of his shirt have been pushed up to the forearms and in this light you can make out the intricate swirls and patterns that make up the inky lines marked into his tan skin. 
“It was just a little fever, we went to see Madja,” You say softly sighing as you lift the babe from tub, “he was crying for you this afternoon.” The words come out much too clipped for you to play them off as jest. 
When Nyx is swaddled in a plush ivory robe he squeaks in delight at the sight of his father, his babbles devolving into calls of ‘dada’ and ‘dad’ until Rhys takes him in his arms pressing light kisses along the curve of his sons pointed ears and clammy forehead. 
Rhysand sighs deeply, inhaling the scent of his son’s lavender soap. Nyx’s curled fists tug happily at Rhys as he carries him from the washroom and into the nursery. The High Lord makes quick work of changing the babe into a dark purple sleepsuit and you catch him checking over him guiltily-- running a thumb over his tear-tracked cheeks and murmuring a muted I’m sorry into his sons onyx hair. 
“I’m sorry, Love,” Rhys says quietly as he tucks Nyx into his crib, his voice is hardly more than a whisper and you try to focus on the way his broad hand rubs sleepy circles onto Nyx’s back as he slips easily into a state of dreaming. 
The babe is an oddly sound sleeper. 
“Sorry that I haven’t been here, it’s just--” Nyx stirs a little as Rhys leads you out into the hallway, “It’s been a rough few weeks.” He huffs another tired sigh and leads you down into the living room. 
The emerald light casts the room in a jade glow that reminds you of Hewn City so much that it makes your skin crawl. Rhys finds his place by the fire in the armchair he had claimed that first night he brought you here. This time you don’t wait to be seated and instead take the armchair directly opposite him. 
“You don’t have to explain to me, Rhys,” You whisper softly, a hand reaching out to take his in a gesture of friendship and comfort. He takes it without hesitation, with reckless abandon that speaks to how truly vulnerable he is here in this room. Laid bare to you after so many weeks of false pretenses and shameless flirting, “but he cried for you today and you didn’t come.” 
The pain that flashes in those violet eyes manifests into a physical ache in his heart, a hurt so deep that you feel it too, somewhere in the cavern of your heaving chest. 
His pain is yours. As though you are made of the same darkness. Born from the same star.
“You need to come when he calls.” You stand to your full height and Rhys makes no effort to follow, only sinks deeper into the armchair, his body flirting with sleep. From your pocket your slide a small vial of purple liquid across the end table towards him. 
“To help you sleep,” His frown deepens and his brows knit together with a wary concern, “I got it from Madja.”
“I don’t need to sleep.” Rhys eyes it suspiciously and through dark, thick lashes regards you with narrow eyes, “I need…I need a drink.” His hand stretches towards the empty whiskey glass on the dark mahogany end table. His broad fingers flex lightly around the glass in his hand and before he can reach for the decanter of amber liquid your hand closes around his with a fond pressure as your eyes plead with his.
“Doctor’s orders, I’m afraid,” You say lightly, feinging an air of regret in your words as you slide the purple vial closer still, “A good night’s sleep tonight.”
“And in the morning?”
“A shave.” Rhysand’s resounding groan echoes around the dark halls of the townhouse. The sound, like velvet night, becomes the soothing lullaby that sends you into a dreamless sleep. 
A thing of lovely beauty.
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Text
there was no place in nature we could meet ; suguru geto
synopsis; it’s never fun to run into an ex. especially when the ex in question is your unfairly handsome high school sweetheart — who also just so happens to be a wanted mass murderer.
word count; 3.3k
contents; suguru geto/reader, gn!reader, geto-typical angst, exes to [redacted], lots of longing, geto is kind of a cunt but also disgustingly charming, reader is understandably upset, biblical imagery (i just think he’s so serpent coded), curse user geto is his own warning tbh
a/n; i wanted this to be a drabble so bad but it ended up just a little too long for me to get away w it so … :’3 yeah. i hate suguru geto (said w affection)
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the moon is out.
in the shadows of the street corner you find yourself in, seated comfortably on the sidewalk, it’s a welcome distraction. something to look at, in the midst of your loneliness; the evanescent glow of the moon, illuminating your solitude.
a solitude soon to be broken. shattered into pieces, battered and bruised beyond recognition, jagged shards littering the asphalt. digging into the soles of your shoes.
”hey.”
for a second, you think you must be dreaming.
the figure obscuring the light of the lamp post in front of you is familiar. too familiar, a little too dear for your liking. as you grasp your shitty cup ramen, seeking the warmth seeping through the polystyrene, all you can do is stare. blinking dumbly, drowsily.
geto looks something like a bad omen.
sharp facial features, even sharper eyes. so dark they almost shift from an amber-tainted cedar into an obsidian black — two abysses, staring into your soul, beckoning you closer. they were always enchanting, but now you think they look almost hypnotizing. not at all in a good way. dark hair frames his face, cascading down his back, longer than you remember it being. and he’s wearing robes.
still has those fucked up bangs, though. of all the things to keep.
the gears of your mind turn, endlessly, untangling the mess of thoughts inside your brain. ensuring you that no, you are not hallucinating, and no, you didn’t fall into a deep slumber somewhere between the moment you exited the convenience store and sat down by one of tokyo’s empty street corners. this is real. a reality you can’t comprehend, can’t even begin to process.
what stands in front of you is a ghost. but ghosts don’t exist, can’t be seen, can’t touch the living.
(so how is he able to haunt you like this?)
what eventually jolts you out of your silent stupor is not the questioning tilt of his head, nor the suffocating sensation of your heart crawling up your throat, but the feeling of soft fur against your leg. the stray cat you met further down the street meows at you, sweetly, trying to get your attention. you think she must be asking for more grilled fish.
so, completely ignoring the apparition in front of you, you turn to reach for the little plastic bag you bought as a midnight snack — digging out a bit of fish for the kitty to enjoy. she seems happy, settling down by your feet. purring softly.
geto watches, eerily silent. 
(maybe he’s upset that you’re ruining his dramatic entrance. you hope so.)
finally, you have no choice but to look at him. a lump forms in the back of your throat, clogging up a little more for every second spent falling into the trap he’s laid out for you, trailing over his moonlit features with your tired gaze.
mouth full of noodles, staring holes into his attire, you narrow your eyes. suddenly disgruntled.
his lips quirk up. ”something the matter?” he asks, and you can’t even begin to describe how much you hate his voice. how devastatingly deep it is, during the late hours of the night. even deeper than it was back in high school. 
slurping up the soggy noodles, you lean back a little, licking some broth off your lips. finally meeting those abyssal eyes. 
”… i was gonna say those robes look like shit on you,” you exhale, weary, ”but you actually kinda pull them off. that’s…” 
a beat. you struggle to find the right word. 
”annoying.”
geto’s lips curl up, smoothly, and you find a hint of familiar amusement in the vague crinkle of his eyes. barely visible crows’ feet. then he’s moving — plopping down right beside you, robes fluttering with the breeze.
”thanks,” he hums. crossing his legs.
the silence that festers around you is odd. not quite suffocating, nor especially fragile. definitely not comforting. it’s familiar, yet different, and it hurts a bit more than it should. but you choose to look at him, out of the corner of your eye, and he looks right back at you. still smiling. 
when your eyes settle on the particular cloth wrapped around his torso, you just barely manage to bite back a taunting chuckle.
”a gojo-kesa, huh?” you grin, and geto doesn’t flinch. he doesn’t miss the meaningful glint in your eyes, either. almost satirical. ”you miss him that much?”
”just a coincidence,” is all he answers. smiling, but you think it looks a little stiff.
your grin widens, for a second, before settling back down. a sad transition. you let it go. 
”whatever you say, geto.”
at that, he visibly reacts. barely noticeable, but it’s there — a twitch of his lithe fingers, an unknown something that flickers through the scope of his iris. when he looks at you, a neutral smile is playing at his lips. 
”ah. i take it we’re not on first name basis anymore, then?” he asks, jovial. hiding a tinge of something mildly displeased.
a shrug. you pick at what’s left of your ramen with your chopsticks, a little too nauseous to enjoy it. ”call me whatever you want. i just don’t see suguru when i look at you, y’know?” leaning forward, you begin to pet the kitty by your feet. ”he was sweeter.”
geto smiles. almost a grin, but not quite there. a chuckle spills out from his lips, and something about it irritates you. ”was he?”
”yeah,” you nod. without hesitation. a summer-stained memory blooms behind your eyelids, but you try not to look at it. all you catch is a glimpse of cherry blossoms. ”you just seem bitter.” 
the grin that finds its way onto your lips is self-deprecating. a shadow falls over your face. ”guess we’re similar in that way, huh?”
a hum buzzes in his throat. he casts a meaningful glance towards your hand, scratching behind the cat’s ear. ”oh, i don’t know about that,” he drawls, smile growing. ”.. you seem just as sweet as always.”
to your grave annoyance, you can’t control the way your face changes at his words. a twitch of your lips gives away your discontentment, and something sour settles on the tip of your tongue.
(your blood begins to boil, beneath your skin.)
geto sighs, suddenly, filling the tense silence surrounding you. a little theatrical. ”ah, but that’s a shame.” he turns to you, soft pout playing at his lips. ”i was hoping i could hear you call me suguru again…”
”— i was hoping you’d come back.”
a beat.
(somewhere outside your vision, a crow takes flight into the night sky. swallowed by the darkness, melting into the sea of black. no longer perceivable, by you or the world.)
”but you never did,” the polystyrene of the plastic cup crinkles beneath your fingers. your eyes look dull. ”so what the fuck do you want, exactly?”
”i heard.” geto rests his jaw on the heel of his palm, gazing at you with those piercing eyes. like he’s trying to see inside your brain. ”.. about your decision.”
”ah,” a grin splits across the curve of your lips, showing off the white of your teeth. ”of course. that’s what this is about, huh?”
with groggy movements, you throw away your nearly-empty cup of noodles, haphazardly aiming towards a trash can across the street. it bounces off the steel cover, landing on the ground with a soft thud. leftover broth spilling out across the pavement.
(geto doesn’t bother to hide his amusement, lips twitching upwards as one of his curses goes to pick it up. you furrow your brows in embarrassed annoyance.)
a moment passes, and something in you knows that he’s waiting. it’s like you can practically sense it, like it’s etched into your bones. the same way you always knew exactly when he would begin to get impatient during your nightly convenience store runs in high school, after you had spent about five minutes struggling to decide what kind of chips you wanted. 
”what can i say,” you lean back, palms against the rough concrete. breathing in the midnight air. ”you inspired me.”
geto tilts his head. smiling. always, always smiling. he smiled at you the day before he massacred that village, too. ”oh?”
with a deep breath, cool air courses through your body. burning your lungs. ”i realized being a sorcerer is completely fucking meaningless,” you exhale through your nose. ”and that trying to change that fact is even more meaningless.” 
a wicked, rueful grin rests on your lips. ”so i left.”
geto doesn’t say anything, so you continue. voice dripping with venom.
”i’m a civilian now,” you purr, mocking. a sardonic coo cast his way. ”does that bother you? feel like killing me?”
his smile looks a little off, now. tilted in a direction you don’t want to recognize. you don’t care to examine it further, don’t care to figure out if it might look just a little bit sad, because that’d only hurt more.
so you look away.
a click of his tongue. then he speaks, with that honeyed voice, raspy and husky. almost a groan. ”well, i can’t say i approve.”
he’s looking at you. sharp eyes digging into your skin, dissecting you, a million words he expects you to grasp from that look alone.
”you’re better than them,” he states, and you try not to squirm when his eyes trail over your features. ”worlds better.” his voice sounds almost motherly, a twisted concern that makes you cower a little. like he’s scolding you. a crease between his brows.
”i don’t like the thought of you surrounded by these animals.”
a huff pushes past your lips, but it sounds shakier than you’d like it to. you hope he just chalks it up to the chill of the air. then again, when has he ever made anything easy for you?
”what, you got a problem with cats now?” you reach for the little furball licking grilled fish off the concrete, picking it up. cradling it close. ”gonna go on a cat-killing spree?”
an amused exhale. geto narrows his eyes. ”funny,” he hums, but his eyes say you know what i mean.
it takes you a moment to regain control over your breathing. there’s still something tense in your shoulders, and your heart still feels a little like it might jump out of your throat and crawl into his lap. the stray cat slips from your grasp, moving towards geto, curiously sniffing at his robes. he looks at it with no ill intent, and it puts you at ease.
”well, i appreciate the concern, buddy,” you pat his back, trying not to flinch at the contact. trying to appear relaxed. ”but frankly, i don’t give a shit. i actually like my job, unlike literally every single sorcerer on planet earth.”
geto stills.
”.. buddy?” he echoes, ignoring every other bitter word you just graced him with. for some reason, he actually seems visibly bothered. ”i’m buddy now?”
you click your tongue. muttering, tiredly. a little exasperated. ”.. what else would you be?”
and then he smiles, again. only this time, it looks oddly genuine. the same as you remember, framed by cherry blossoms and the fizzle of youth.
his movements are smooth. like he’s completely unguarded, like this situation doesn’t bother him in the slightest. elegant, in the way he leans back, palms on the concrete to support his weight. keeping eye contact with you, all the while.
when he speaks, his voice has a sweet tinge to it. nostalgic, maybe. wistful. if you hear a touch of longing, you choose to ignore it.
”i seem to recall you calling me baby quite a lot,” he hums, and you stiffen. gritting your teeth. eyes darkening, but he continues. ”what else was there? angel, i think… it was sweet.”
then he’s leaning forward. scratching the cat under its chin, gently. ”ironic, though.”
an inhale. then, an exhale. they’re a little shaky, a little meek, but at least they make the lump in your throat feel less like it’s blocking your windpipe. air fills your lungs, but it tastes like nothing at all. 
something like sorrow simmers in your eyes. or maybe more like fatigue. god, you really want to cry.
(you wonder if he gets some sickening satisfaction out of seeing you like this, out of breaking you. maybe it just makes him feel rotten. you don’t know what you’d prefer.)
”suguru,” you murmur, at last. voice dripping with exhaustion. defeated, the sigh that flows from your lips. ”why did you come here?”
”join me.”
the words spill out into the open air, slicing the silence in half. heavy. a request, not a question. against your better judgement, you turn your head to meet his gaze.
”we could use you,” he says, and there’s hope in those keen eyes. he maintains his distance, but for some reason you still feel like prey being sized up by a predator. like he’s weighing your value.
a chuckle slips from your lips, but there’s no humour to it. ”use me…” you echo, a tired murmur under your breath. ”you're just straight up admitting it, huh? kinda refreshing.”
”that’s not what i meant.”
he inches closer. slowly, as if trying not to scare you. reaching out, to brush through your bangs, his fingertips ghosting over your skin. tangling them between your locks, inserting himself into your space. testing the waters. 
you don’t look at him, completely still. barely breathing. like a wounded animal.
”i want you there,” he says, and it comes out almost as a whisper. ”with us.”
unable to resist the temptation, you indulge in a single brief glance his way. his eyes look warm, and his lips look soft as they part.
”with me.” 
there’s a devotion to his voice when he continues, one he’s always had. one you thought you’d always be able to trust. ”i’ll create a world where you can be happy,” he vows. ”i swear it.”
a moment passes.
(you swallow thickly. it takes everything you have not to burst into tears. when you remember how he brushed you off, back then, it gets a little easier. when you remember all the skipped meals.)
”.. like you give a damn.”
geto smiles. you loathe how soft it looks, how similar it is to the one suguru always had. when you used to eat your ramen too quickly and started choking on it, and he brought a palm to your upper back, patting it gently. he’d chuckle, and tell you to slow down, and the softness of his smile would almost be enough to distract you from the amusement in his eyes. 
”my love.”
you flinch. breath drawing back at the base of your throat, heart screeching to a halt, and some part of you emerges; the shy, sweet kid you used to be. hanging on to his every world. like he was your sun, your guiding light. back when that purr of my love had you blushing furiously, not choking back a string of curses.
it’s sudden, and you can’t react the way you want to. you want to kill him for calling you that. for thinking he has any right to call you his, anymore.
but that sweet, naive, innocent little kid still exists. even if you want to pretend otherwise. it’s there, somewhere, that part of you — peeking out from behind the curtain. and it stops you from saying anything that might hurt him.
(it’s so hard to hate him when he calls you that.)
if geto notices your inner turmoil — he must — then he doesn’t mention it. you don’t say anything, but you hope the amused, harsh exhale you partake in is signal enough for him to cut it off. now.
yet he continues. there’s love in his voice when he speaks, barely contained. if he’s trying not to hurt you he’s doing an awful job.
”… i never stopped thinking of you,” he whispers, so low you almost miss it. ”not once. i left for you, not just for myself.”
and, despite every part of your being resisting it, a sweetness settles on your tongue. so sweet it’s sickening; the thought that maybe he’s telling the truth, maybe he really has been thinking of you. maybe you’re more to him than just a means to meet an end, or a memory yet to be buried.
geto looks at the moon. bathed in moonlight, he looks a little like a god. like something reverent. his voice is honeyed. low, like a secret.
”this world doesn't deserve you.”
silence.
a subtle anger trickles through your veins, a kind of fury, subdued, carefully tucked away. sparking to life inside the depths of your eyes when you look at him. bitter, given everything. but your voice still comes out sounding something like a plea.
”and you think you do?”
another smile. this time, it looks a little sad. remorseful, maybe. ”… let me prove myself.”
his touch burns. the pads of his fingers against your cold skin, cupping your cheek. slithering down to grasp your hand. and you’re pliant, unable to react. just sitting with that aching hollow feeling in your chest.
”i wasn’t worthy, back then,” he hums, bringing your hand to his lips. ”but now…”
a kiss to your knuckle. featherlight. reverent. you try not to shiver, but when he says your name, dragging each syllable out, like they belong on his tongue —
a chill runs down your spine.
when he speaks, you feel his warm breath on your skin. it’s dizzying. ”i’m not the same suguru you once knew,” he admits, a forlorn look in his eyes. and devotion, frighteningly sincere. ”unlike him — i’ll never let you go.”
what a twisted desire. he wants to take you with him, drag you down to hell. the suguru you knew wouldn’t put you through that. but maybe you’re even more twisted, for wishing he had; for wishing he had taken you with him, ten years ago, instead of leaving without a single goodbye.
geto’s voice is soft. coaxing, like he's handling a frightened mouse. join me, he whispers, and you think of eve. when you look at his mouth you think you see serpents’ teeth behind his lips.
(you're almost sure he notices it. and you're almost sure his smile widens, lips curling up, as if preparing to open his maw and swallow you whole.)
a sickening sense of resignation roots itself somewhere in your gut. 
you pull your hand away, and he lets you. the loss of warmth hits you like a freight train, but you aren’t sure you could think clearly with his skin on yours. when you part your lips to speak, only air comes out, just barely forming a sentence. like there are no more words to say. like the world stopped spinning around you both a lifetime ago.
”i don't love you.”
for just a second, his smile falters. 
”.. no?” he hums, and you wish it didn’t hurt so bad to see him hurt. his eyes carry a kind of patience, something gentle. ”it’s fine… these things take time.”
a bitter chuckle. ”like you’d know anything about waiting,” you spit, and it comes out sounding venomous. a phantom ache sprouts in the spot where his lips touched your skin.
geto closes his eyes.
”.. you don't need to love me,” he says, finally. kind. you hate that he still sounds so kind. so understanding, like nothing you do could be wrong in his eyes. ”as long as you're beside me, that's enough.” 
he turns to look at you, and his smile looks very real, for a moment. impossibly fond. ”i have two daughters. i’ve told them about you,” he smiles. ”my family… you’d like them. i know they’d like you.”
dark clouds cover the moon, suddenly, and a shadow falls across you both. illuminated only by the streetlight. in the distance, you hear a car whooshing by.
”don’t stay at the bottom,” he beckons, and your name slips from his lips again. soft, his tongue bending around the vowels. coaxing. stirring your heartstrings like a puppeteer.
then he’s standing up, dusting off his robes, large hands smoothing down the fabric. turning around, towering over you; obscuring everything else. all you see is him, under the glow of the lamp post. a halo of artificial light.
”come. let me show you the world we can create.”
he gives you a sweet smile, two abysses gazing at you. the promise of something, something twisted. something new. forbidden. you think of red skin, yellow flesh. the bite of sin.
and for a second, you see it. the world. a world where laughter comes from the bottom of your gut, and the trees are always ripe for picking, red apples hanging from the branches like glowing rubies. 
paradise.
geto stretches a hand out towards you. fingers unfurling, one by one, like a blooming camellia. close, right there in front of you, so close that you’re tempted to take his hand in yours, let him carry you away. burn everything else to the ground. 
(you think of the serpent. you think of god.
only one of them banished eve.)
”so,” he smiles. ”what do you say?”
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