#he was like 70 when i took lessons is his ass still alive | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

miss-kittys-magical-library · 3 years

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In honor of Rob's birthday, can you write a Rob character of your choice with reader or an OC of your choice celebrating his birthday? Fluffy and maybe some light smut? Go wild. ;)

Your Song

Words: 1760

Warnings: Fluff turned smut

A/N: Just inserting Honey and Leon into random awesome points in music history. Cribbed from a scene in "Rocketman," directed by Nathan's freakishly short dad (Dexter Fletcher)

Leon and Honey stumbled and giggled down a path in the woods behind a house in the Canyon. They stopped to kiss under a Laurel tree, laughing when Leon’s hair got tangled up in some branches. Sometimes he seemed to forget how tall he was.

It was unusually warm for early January, but after a show at the Troubadour a party at Mama Cass’s bungalow felt like a serendipitous idea. They held tight to one another’s hands a bit drunk on elderberry wine. Maybe a brownie or two, their first since coming back to the States.

The couple hadn't been alone in several years, not really. Not since Selina was born. They had left her behind in Manhattan with Honey’s parents with an invite from Johnny (who somehow found himself doing far better in LA than he ever did in London.) Away from the snow and slush and post-holiday angry New Yorkers. The Bartucci’s back in their comedy club that Honey bought back and reopened at the start of a new decade. They really could use a vacation. Who turns down Elton John?

Suddenly, today, Leon found himself thirty years old. The 70s weren't much different than the 60s. Rock music got better, the clothes stayed almost the same. Still the same causes for Honey to throw herself into, Leon by her side but with a toddler strapped to his back. Maybe he would never actually be on the moon, but Honey certainly brought it down to him in their little girl.

“We've gotta get back to the house,” Honey lifted Leon’s hand up and brushed her mouth against his knuckles. “I worked a little something out with Elton.” She started to tug him along.

Leon dug his heels into the dirt, and his girlfriend’s arm nearly came out of its socket. “Honnn eeeyyy,” that sexy whine. “You've gone and brought Mr Elton John into it? Oh I'm not big on my birthday, you know that.”

Honey planted her hands on her hips, “Not everyone in our generation is gonna get to turn thirty. There's a piano in the house, and he thinks it's far out. Now c'mon, don't be a spoil sport.” She mimicked Leon's accent.

“Only if he says it's alright. Know how I am ‘bout doing things that aren't my bag.” Still he followed her down to the house, hands in his pockets as Honey literally skipped ahead, bits of bark in her hair.

It all felt unearthly, being surrounded by musicians whose records they had back in The Village. Or how short they all were. Save for John Phillips, the only person who towered slightly over Leon that night. Everyone called him Kubrick in jest, but his cheeks flushed all the same. He perked up straight away when Cass tugged on his vest. The one Honey made. He wore it now over a long sleeved thermal shirt and tight jeans that boot-legged instead of belled.

“Say this is pretty groovy. This is almost flashy enough for Elton to wear.” Her hands ran over the fabric.

“Honey made it. Our first Christmas together back in ‘67. London. Where I'm from. Well no I'm from Greece but,” Leon stammered.

“Relax man. We don't bite! That's Michelle’s job. Your old lady said you've got a kid back East. Me too. Owen, she's around here somewhere.”

You could tell she was whacked out on something. Everyone here was except Leon and Honey. Not really tipsy anymore both down from the brownie earlier. Looking around, the party goers were at the various stages of undress and sex. It was like the couple got rid of Renatis and replaced him with Mama Cass. Except she was so much cooler, her vibe felt truer and at ease.

“Yeah Selina. She's four I think?”

Leon scratched his head before noticing Honey sitting on the piano bench with a guitar. Topless. Elton beside her, also topless but still in his jeans. What a strange fucking life he and Johnny got into after coming here in 1970.

“Like the moon! I get it, Kubrick! Honey said you really love her. Cherish it man, they'll be us soon enough,” she winked. Then Cass affectionately pat his cheek like a mother would.

Leon’s heart would break a year later when she died. Everyone’s heart would. Always touching his face anytime he heard her sing.

For now she was alive and sat down in a chair. Leon leaned against the doorframe as Honey and Elton started to play. Lost in his own world, everyone else in the bungalow faded away except her. He wrapped a finger up in a stray curl that fell from his ponytail, smiling in her direction.

It took him a moment to realize these two people were singing TO Leon and not everyone else. He was so caught up in the way Honey’s fingers moved expertly over the strings. Was this why she asked for lessons? How he always fell in love just by looking at her.

So excuse me forgetting

But these things I do

You see I've forgotten, if they're green or they're blue

Anyway the thing is, what I really mean

Yours are the sweetest eyes I've ever seen

And you can tell everybody

This is the song

It may be quite simple, but now that it's done

I hope you don't mind

That I put down in the words

Later in a loft, Honey and Leon naked on the floor. Leon's lips making their way down Honey’s chest where he stops to take a nipple in his mouth. Sucking hungrily before teasing it with his teeth. Biting somewhere between playful and rough. Alternating between each of her breasts before continuing down over her stomach. Tongue dipping into her navel.

Honey’s back arches into Leon and she moans softly. Her hand lost in his hair as sexual instinct makes her urge him further down. But her brain says through her mouth,

“Wait, it's your birthday. Let me give you head.” The words breathless.

Leon is already diving into her. His tongue snaking deep inside like his fingers often do before going for her clit. Flicking at it a few times, circling it quicker. His hands spread her thighs so he has better access as he works her faster. His head moving up and down the whole time.

Then: “If I wanna go down on you for MY birthday, the only way you're gonna stop me is by saying no.” Leon paused, large eyes gazing up at Honey. His mouth glistening. “Are you saying no, then?”

“Fuck no, I love when you do this. I just figured you wanted to lay back and let me suck you off.”

He smiled and went back to it. Burying his face into Honey further. Then switching from his quick pace, Leon ran his tongue agonizingly slow along her cunt. The entire length of one side, sucking on it, plunging it in to work around Honeys clit then up the other side. Repeating this a few times, tongue manipulating her clit longer and faster.

Honey felt that heat build in her sex. That throb and the contraction. She cried out with that sudden swell of wetness before she came. She was so close but her mouth opened:

“Leon stop!”

Leon sat up and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, “What? What's wrong? Too much, love?”

“No no it was the perfect amount of too much. I don't wanna cum before we fuck.”

“Now THAT'S a bleeding birthday present. Time for me to get a toss over?” Leon's eyes shone with excitement. “Can we shag where someone might catch us?”

He stood up and helped Honey to her feet. Walking her to the railing that exposed the loft to the living room below where everyone had played their music before. A couple was already going at it on the couch not very silently.

Leon put his hand on the thick wood and yanked a few times to check its strength. It was perfect.

Honey situated herself in front of him, back pressing into his chest. She lifted her foot up on the bottom part and jutted her hips back into her partner’s erection. She anchored herself with her arms spread along the length of railing where he had just tested it.

Leon covered only one of Honey’s hands, his arm parallel to hers. The other hand taking the head of his cock teasing her with it. Then clutching the thick of her hip, he buries himself up to the hilt inside of her.

In his excitement, Leon began pounding into Honey madly. His hips hitting her ass every time created a rhythmic slapping sound. No longer needing to brace himself on her waist, he covered Honey’s mouth instead as her mewls of pleasure began.

Honey cried out into Leon's hand. Her body twisting slightly to give him better access. They had rutted this way enough that she knew angling her cunt downwards allowed him to hit her G spot. Something it took them both several years to figure out. Now that they had..

Leon lost himself in slamming into Honey with a speed he hadn’t felt since he did cocaine. The sweat created a shean across his cheeks, neck and chest from the heat they were building. Gut told him it would start forming on her forehead and stomach. What little he was grasping also told him Honey’s tits and ribs were crashing into the railing.

“Steady on, love.” Whispering huskily in her ear. “Yeah. I love being inside you. Never gonna get fucking sick of it. Your twat drives me barking.”

Honey kept on and kept up. That cataclysm in her walls, they flexed around Leon's cock suddenly. She squealed loudly into his hand as she came so hard her stomach muscles cramped. Her body still took to being rammed.

But not long, spurred on by the constriction of Honey’s orgasm, Leon exploded inside of her. Releasing completely but biting down on her shoulder to prevent from yelling out into the stillness.

Honey winced, but her gasp came out closer to another cry of pleasure. Her body cumming again unexpectedly. Leon would use that against her happily in the future.

They untangled themselves and were kissing in the dark. Then from downstairs came a humming. It soon turned into singing. The voice belonged to a tiny Englishman with diamond studded glasses.

“How wonderful life is while you’re in the world."

Tag: @robertsheehanownsmyass @badsext @joz-stankovich @elliethesuperfruitlover @nightmonsters

#robert sheehan #robert sheehan character fic #request #neuroticpuppy #leon x honey

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amythedvdhoarder · 4 years

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Dinner Plans

Pairing: Bucky x reader

For the Flex Your Muscles Writing Challenge set up by @captain-rogers-beard

8th of June prompt: A bloody knife

Summary: Your romantic dinner plans don’t quite go to plan

Warnings: Minor injury detail, swearing and fluff

Word count: 1.3K

Authors note: GIF not mine. The writing challenge continues so does the Bucky fluff. Please let me know what you think! If you want tagging you know what to do. Enjoy!

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Your hips swayed to the music blasting through your headphones. The communal kitchen was empty so you really went for it, signing along with the song loudly without the fear of being overheard. The whole team was out on a mission; you were a data analyst for Tony which left you alone in this part of the compound. So, you kept yourself occupied preparing dinner for when your boyfriend, Bucky, returned. He had text you a couple of hours ago with an ETA. You had immediately sprung into action; planning a nice evening in for when he returned. Bucky liked to unwind when he got back from missions. This usually consisted of some dinner with you away from the rest of the team and chatting about what you had been up to whilst he was away. Followed by an evening in bed, curled up against Bucky’s chest. More often than not, the black and white movie you had put on, would be forgotten about as hands would begin to roam as you became reacquainted with each other.

You and Bucky had been together for 18 months now and you couldn’t remember ever being happier. When he joined the team, you had been tasked with taking him through all the files Tony had collected on the winter soldier over the years. It had been difficult for Bucky to look back over these, he wanted to learn as much as he could but it was painful for him to fill in the blanks of the last 70 years of his life. You had supported him through the anger, disgust, guilt and self-loathing he felt as his uncovered his past. By the end of the few weeks Bucky felt as if you knew him better than anyone, except Steve of course. In those few short weeks he had opened up, and exposed you to the true Bucky Barnes. At first, he only spoke when he needed help but after seeing that you weren’t repulsed by him, by who he had been, by what he had done, he softened; asking you about your day, bringing you a latte in the morning and eventually asking you on a date.

Bucky thought of himself as one of the luckiest people alive. Sure, he had been through a lot but now he had you. The kind, bright and intelligent woman who saw past his time as the winter soldier, to the man he was. He spent every morning when he woke looking at your sleeping form, still not quite believing you were real or that someone like you loved him. When he went away on a mission he missed you. He missed you so much that it felt as if there was a weight in his chest, which only eased on the journey back to you. He could feel the weight leaving him now as the compound came into view from the quinjet. Excitement bubbled within him, he pictured you smile when you saw him, a grin forming on his own lips. He couldn’t wait to wrap you in his arms pulling you close and not letting go until he had kissed every perfect inch of your face. He practically ran off the jet towards to living quarters, earning a chuckle from his best friend. Steve had seen Bucky infatuated with many women over the years, but he had never seen his friend in love.

Bucky headed to the apartment first, hoping to find you but you weren’t there. So, he quickly showered and changed before heading off in search for you. He heard your singing before spotting you in the corner of the kitchen, your attention on something he couldn’t see. He stood for a minute, enjoying the view of your jean clad ass swinging side to side to a rhythm he couldn’t here. A grin plastered to his face as he crept up behind and grabbed your waist.

You screamed as a pair of strong hands grabbed your waist from behind. A bloody knife clattered to the floor. Ripping your headphones from your ears you turned around to find your attacker. A sharp stinging pain in your hand made you look down at it. Warm blood was trickling from the wound on your hand. You blinked a couple of times and then the world went black “Shit, doll. It’s me, I’m sorry. Y/N?.” Your eyes fluttered open to find concerned blue eyes searching yours. You realised you were on the floor, resting in Bucky’s arms. The sight of blood made you faint, he must have caught you before you hit the floor. You tried to sit up but Bucky held you down. “Whoa, take it easy Y/N. Let me look at that hand. His fingers lifted your hand towards him for inspection, you shut your eyes tight not wanting to catch a glimpse of the blood. “I’m going to have to stitch this up.” Panic filled your chest “No, no, it’ll be fine. Just need a bandage or something” your voice wobbled as you tried to protest, you turned to look at him shaking your head. “Not going to argue about it doll, need to close it up to stop you getting an infection.” He placed a gentle kiss to your head then shifted behind you and pulled his t-shirt off, wrapping it tightly around your hand. He hooked his metal arm behind your knees and lifted you up to his bare chest, carrying you out of the kitchen towards your ensuite. “I could have walked you know?” you mumbled against his chest. “Y/N, you just fainted. Not taking any more chances.” You rolled your eyes at his overprotectiveness.

Bucky sat you on the sat you on the vanity unit next to the sink and grabbed the first aid box he had stored for himself after missions. He swiped his thumb over your cheek and kissed your forehead before unwrapped the t-shirt from your hand. You looked away as he started cleaning the gash on your hand. “I’m going to give you something to numb it a little bit now, Ok?” Words wouldn’t come out of your mouth so you nodded slightly. A sharp scratch later and with the pain lessoned, Bucky got to work stitching up the cut. “All done” he said triumphantly. You looked down and saw the delicate stitches on your hand. You swayed slightly at the sight. Bucky immediately had his arms on your shoulders holding you upright “Maybe don’t look at that Y/N” he chuckled softly. He picked you up and took you though to the bedroom, laying you on the bed. He pulled a clean t-shirt on a turned to you “back in a minute”.

Five minutes later he returned with two cups of hot chocolate and some biscuits. As you sipped at the drink you started to feel normal again. “Not quite the dinner plans I had.” Bucky turned to look at you, you could tell by his face that he felt guilty. “Y/N” he put his drink down and took your injured hand in his, carefully avoiding the stiches. “I didn’t realise you would be chopping something, I am so sorry. I just wanted to surprise you. I missed you.” He looked down at the covers and let go of your hand. “Bucky, it’s ok. Accidents happen.” He didn’t move. You turned to put your drink down and shifted over so you were pressed up against him, your hand running through his short hair. His arm automatically wrapped around your waist, pulling you closer. As you placed a kiss on his cheek, he turned to captured yours in a delicate kiss. “I missed you too” you whispered against his lips.

#flex your writing muscles challenge #bucky x reader #bucky barnes #bucky #bucky imagine #bucky fluff #james buchanan barnes #marvel fanfics #marvel #avengers #writing challenge

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makeste · 4 years

Text

BnHA Chapter 262: A Fierce Bad Rabbit

Previously on BnHA: The hospital raid squad, which had two jobs consisting of (1) not letting Ujiko get away, and (2) not letting any of the Noumu break free to go ravage the countryside, impressively failed at both of these tasks (or so I assume) in a remarkably short amount of time. The EndeavorZawaMicLock squad were all occupied with having a very destructive fight in the hospital lobby, leaving my girl Miruko, Goddess of Courage and First of Her Name, to do pretty much all the heavy lifting, which, fine!! Except that Ujiko remembered that he had a bunch of High End Noumus just floating there waiting to be activated, and he was all “!!” and fucking activated them, and like five of them went after Miruko all at once and smashed her into a bunch of machinery and glass tubes, which frankly should have killed her but it didn’t because she’s a fucking boss. But now it’s just her (and Crust, who might do something too, but for now JURY’S STILL OUT) against all these guys while Ujiko speeds off to grab Tomura and abscond. So basically everything that could go wrong has already gone wrong so UH. OKAY.

Today on BnHA: Miruko kicks ass. Then she checks her watch and sees that there’s still time for her to kick more ass, so she does. Then there is still time, because this chapter is all about her kicking ass! So she kicks even more ass!! It’s great!! I have no complaints!! She decapitates a man with her thighs!! That’s a thing that really happens!! Also she loses an arm but WHO HASN’T LOST AND/OR BROKEN THEIR ARMS IN THIS SERIES, REALLY. Everyone is doing it. Somehow she manages to make it look cool because Miruko. Miruko can strangle a man with a cordless phone. She can kill two stones with one bird. Miruko makes onions cry. Death once had a near-Miruko experience. Mirukoooooooo. Anyway the chapter ends with Skeptic warning everyone at The Ol’ Villain Hotel that the heroes are coming, so basically WELCOME BACK, EVERYONE, this manga is back with a vengeance.

guys I’m gonna try to do this recap fast because I’m seeing Heroes Rising tonight at 7:30! and I’m so excited! and for those that asked, yes I do plan on doing some kind of write-up about it, though it’ll all be from memory after the fact so we’ll see how that goes. but !! I’ve waited 84 years for this ahhhhh but anyway so in the meantime let’s see what new and creative ways our heroes are finding to screw this up even more

(ETA: I did it but this thing isn’t edited for shit lol. after I get back I’ll give it a more thorough readthrough so sorry if I missed any really obvious errors! also there are probably way more exclamation points than usual which may or may not be a plus or minus.)

look at this helpful announcement

High End Noumu approaching, everyone. you have been warned. just in case you somehow failed to notice?? IT’S RIGHT THERE Y’ALL LOOK OUT

lmao FINALLY

MORE HEROES. YOU ALL CERTAINLY TOOK YOUR FUCKING TIME, but hey welcome to the party. and none of that “I don’t see how that’s a party” sassy shit either. you all know what I’m talking about so get out there and have fun

so they’re standing there all “it’s a talking Noumu!” and YEAH. that’s what I’ve been fucking trying to tell you. thank god someone finally fucking said it out loud so that hopefully the EZML squad can finally take notice of this as well. like guys. bigger fish?! get to frying!!

so now Crust is all “there are more of them ahead, Miruko’s in danger!” which, again, thanks for finally letting everyone else in on this formerly exclusive scoop there pal. ‘preciate it

I... really do not understand Crust’s quirk at all. I’m just gonna own up to it

what is this. what does “zuga” mean fx-wise. why did those scale things on his arms get so big. what are they made of. what’s happening

oh it turns out that if you scroll and read more instead of pausing for ages to ask dumb questions, the thing you were asking about might actually be explained in great detail in the very next panel

but what are they made out of though. and why “Crust”?? ah well I suppose that’s a question for someone who actually cares more than I do

by the way the quality of this scan is actually really good so far, I gotta say. we’re only two pages in, true, but they either cleaned this up really nicely, or this was a much higher-quality scan than usual. either way I am appreciative!

lol this poor Noumu is shook

what did I name you two weeks ago, again? Rusty?? anyways he’s doing his best you guys. gambare my dude, though actually you do need to die, so that’s too bad though

Crust is all “you pitiful living corpse!” with tears in his eyes because he’s dramatic! but jokes aside I do appreciate that he has compassion for these monsters who are all still basically innocent victims at the end of the day

does anyone else actually hear that funny-sounding anime narrator guy in your head nowadays when you read panels like this lol

I can hear the voice so clearly and it’s great

only ten times the strength of a normal human, guys. that’s actually not that bad. I’m only half joking lol. because obviously your average hero is going to be much stronger than a so-called “normal” person too, yes? and I’m pretty sure Miruko has the strength of like 30 humans but I may be overestimating her just slightly but am I though

oh lol I apparently did not learn my lesson about doing commentary before I’m done reading hahaha

so High Ends are on a different tier of their own above even the “high” tier. well that’s just. yeah that sounds more like the “we’re still fucked” update that I was expecting

oh wait, seriously??

are you telling me that all of the High Ends were actually cultivated from villains? so maybe not completely innocent, then? is this Horikoshi’s way of trying to make us feel marginally better about the fact that the heroes are shortly henceforth going to have to exterminate these guys with great prejudice? I mean they’re still basically slaves to Ujiko’s programming now though so that sucks

also I missed this earlier but the narration here basically just confirmed that Noumu are all made from corpses. which I kind of suspected, but the still-very-much-alive Tomura would then be a glaring contradiction to that, no? or is that why he’s so special. anyway I do appreciate that we’re getting a lot of much-awaited answers in this Noumu arc, but some of this is also just raising more questions. gotta be patient I guess

speaking of Tomura, Ujiko’s back in the Tomura room, so. I assume some absconding is soon to occur

oh shit!! so there’s another panel explaining that “artificial transplant of quirks” requires surgery and then three months of stabilization time following that. sooooo I’m pretty sure this mofo just confirmed that he gave Tomura some shiny additional new quirks, so that’s nice! that’s real fucking great! I know we were all eyeing Tomura skeptically and thinking to ourselves “this is almost just right, but needs more death”

wait, what?

“I was already dead anyway” meaning that he knows there’s no way out for him? and so he doesn’t have a secret way out of the lab?? ??? can that really be true?? our intrepid heroes actually did their job right and the villains had no contingency plan?? oh my god I am so terrified of letting my guard down lmao I still refuse to believe this at all

and is that Tomura who’s at 70% stabilization? that would seem to fit with the timeline we were given. holy shit is he unboxing him early fsdfkjalsdk are we about to go from “fucked” to “exorbitantly fucked”

and why am I strangely excited about it sob!!

HAHAHAHA OH GOD

so this is how liberty dies. with a beep

also fuck you all, now it’s at 71%?! couldn’t leave it at a nice even number for us, could you? you just had to throw that extra percent in there at the last moment to fuck with us all

anyway did you all catch how fucking ripped he was there though? like boiiii whaaaaat. clearly his abs are already at 100%

OH MY GOD

DOES NOTHING FUCKING FAZE THIS BEAUTIFUL, RULE-BREAKING MOTH

HAHAHA

RIGHT??

HOLY FUCKING MOLY

friendly reminder that Dabi was all good and ready to throw down with both Endeavor and Hawks (who were admittedly weakened by that point) that one time a while back, but then Miruko showed up and he was all “lol nope I think the fuck not” and warped out of there. Dabi, whose quirk is so powerful that its only apparent downside is the fact that it roasts him alive as well. that Dabi took one look at Miruko and decided he likes having his spine intact and fucking vamoosed, because that is the smart fucking thing to do when this girl shows up smiling at you the way that she is smiling at these Noumu now

anyway. fucking Ujiko knew he needed at least five High Ends to even stand a chance of slowing her down, is all I’m saying. y’all better respect the FUCK out of Miruko, everyone. it’s the law

anyway. so. quirk: bunny. can smash rl gud

someone needs to ask Horikoshi the fuck kind of rabbits he has been hanging out with. applied that “and more!” part pretty fucking liberally huh. WHO DID YOU SAY TRIX WERE FOR AGAIN, CHILDREN??

NOBODY THROWS MIRUKO IN THE BRIAR PATCH AND GETS AWAY WITH IT

fffwhatttttttttt

that would be our good buddy Max Rebo. so that’s definitely not an elephant trunk-like thing then. we may need a new name for you

on a side note, I never thought we’d meet another character who looks more like Katsuki than Mitsuki does, and yet every damn week Miruko is proving me wrong. goddamn she is great

lmao wait maybe that wasn’t Max at all, but Jester. because this is clearly Max over here

so Girl!Noumu is a water bender, Jester can do... something weird with his hair, and Max can do anything an elephant can do if that elephant was also powered by steam. nice

HAHAHA BUT MIRUKO IS ALL “KICK!!!”

HOLY FUCK HOLY FUCK!!!

HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT. I WOULD READ AN ENTIRE MANGA OF JUST THIS LMAO THIS IS TOO MUCH ADRENALINE I CAN’T

JESTER’S WEIRD SPIKY ROCK HAIR IS SLICING HER ARM AND SHE’S ALL “THAT HURTS YOU JERK!!!!” AND GETTING READY TO FREAKING PILEDRIVE HIM I CAN’T, THOUGH!?

SDKFJLDKSJFLKJ

HER FATHER PEPPY TAUGHT HER THAT. BARREL ROLL ALL OVER THESE BITCHES!!

WHAT THE FUCK

FUCKING QUIRKS!!!! THOUGH!!!! WILLLLLLLLLD

SDKFJLAS;DHK OH MY GOD OH SHIT

real talk this is the scariest fucking quirk I’ve ever seen I was like what the fuck looking at her arm and then I saw him doing the twisty hand gesture and just. fuck. YOU’RE NOT CRIMSON RIOT AT ALL YOU’RE SOME PSYCHO TELEKINETIC BITCH AND I FUCKING HATE YOU!!

NO!!!!!

fuck fuck fuck. I’M SURE HER ARM’S GOING TO BE JUST FINE AND DANDY AFTER THIS GUYS, DON’T WORRY. THIS MANGA HAS SUCH A SERENE AND TRANQUIL HISTORY WITH ARMS. ISN’T THAT RIGHT DEKU

though on the plus side, if she does lose that arm we can count on her to somehow instantly become like 50x more attractive, which I’m pretty sure might cause the very fabric of the universe to unravel but it would be worth it

(ETA: SHE DID AND IT WAS!!)

MADAME PRESIDENT!! MY QUEEN

OH HELL YERRRRRR

fucking hell guys I’m running out of exclamation points and excited things to say here. AND SHE JUST KEEPS GOING! LIKE HER MOM THE ENERGIZER BUNNY BEFORE HER

I’M SORRY UJIKO DID YOU THINK FIVE HIGH ENDS WAS ENOUGH?! MAYBE NEXT TIME WE MAKE IT TEN, HOW ABOUT THAT. FUCK OFF

lmao holy shit I can’t stop laughingggg

well Crimson, at least you get to die happy. is she literally going to crush his face between her thighs. is this entire chapter just one big prank on me. if Miruko was the protagonist would this series have ended in the first chapter. trick question, the answer is it never would have started to begin with because she would have killed All for One years ago!! how much would it cost to hire Miruko to come kick away all of my problems for me

hello good afternoon everyone this is a real panel that really happened in this manga

I don’t even know what to say about anything anymore

sob she’s all “YEAH RIGHT” and SNAPPING HIS FUCKING NECK WITH A FUCKING TRIANGLE CHOKE, THIS IS REALLY HAPPENING, FUCKING LOOK!! AT!! THIS!!!

we’re not even gonna make it to 300 chapters. Horikoshi held off for as long as he could, but eventually Miruko couldn’t be contained any longer and he had to unleash her and she instantly went and reckt every last fucking bad guy out there until there was nothing left. who are the kids even going to fight. nobody that’s who. go back to school kids

SON OF A BITCH WHAT IS HAPPENING

THIS IS THE MOST VIOLENT THING I HAVE EVER FUCKING SEEN AND YET SOMEHOW I SWEAR I CAN HEAR ANGELS SINGING. RESPLENDENT

SOBBING!!!!

“S’POSE I SHOULD GET THIS ANNOYING THING CHECKED OUT BEFORE I BLEED TO DEATH OR SOME BULLSHIT.” WHAT AN INCONVENIENCE. JUST A FUCKING FLESH WOUND. NOBODY USES ARMS THESE DAYS ANYWAY

“IF THE ONLY WAY TO STOP YOU IS BY CRUSHING YOUR HEADS THIS WILL BE WAY EASIER THAN HOLDING BACK ON A NORMAL VILLAIN.” SOB THIS IS MIRUKO’S WORLD AND WE’RE ALL JUST BEGRUDGINGLY ALLOWED TO EXIST IN IT. MY BARONESS

DID YOU JUST TOURNIQUET YOUR DISMEMBERED FUCKING LIMB WITH YOUR OWN FUCKING HAIR ONE-HANDED FFCKCK KCKCLK JUST MIRUKO THINGS

Miruko also saw Horikoshi getting ready to end the chapter after 17 pages and was like “EXCUSE YOU THERE” and he backed off because he actually likes having a fucking head thank you very much

LMAO AND NOW OF ALL TIMES WE’RE CUTTING BACK TO THE OL’ VILLAIN RESORT. SIGH

Skeptic seems to have finally cottoned on to them being in some kind of trouble. huh

how does he know it was Jin who screwed up?? did he realize that Hawks betrayed them oh shit!?!

OOP HE’S SOUNDING THE ALARM

AND THE CHAPTER IS ENDING. BUT I’M NOT DONE SCREAMING. AHHHHHH well anyways I’m off to watch my children kick lots of ass on the big screen. assuming I can get this posted in time with zero editing whatsoever lol I’ve got like... an hour. WE SHALL SEE!

(ETA: we did it lol just barely! this whole thing is probably a giant mess but oh well! Mirukoooooo)

#bnha 262 #miruko #mirko #ujiko daruma #I already forgot his new official name ah well #bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #makeste spoiler recap #makeste reads bnha #no time for tags!!#movie!!!!

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moulinrougefanfanfans · 5 years

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Moulin Rouge for VOGUE!

(These are the HQ Photo Versions!)

Moulin Rouge!’s Broadway cast, photographed at Kings Theatre in Brooklyn. Sittings Editors: Hamish Bowles, Alexandra Cronan. Produced by 360pm. Set Design: CJ Dockery at Mary Howard Studio; Costume Designer: Catherine Zuber; Choreographer: Sonya Tayeh

Photographed by Baz Luhrmann, Vogue, July 2019

July 2019 Vogue (Online)

BAZ LUHRMANN WAS BORN to reinvent the movie musical for a new generation—which is exactly what he did in 2001 with Moulin Rouge!, his deliriously romantic mash-up, set in 1890s Paris, of La Bohème, La Traviata, and the Orpheus myth, with a soundtrack that exploded with modern-day pop songs, lavish Technicolor sets and costumes (by his wife, Catherine Martin), and a hyperkinetic cinematic style that drew on MGM musicals, MTV videos, and Bollywood spectaculars. The motto of this blatantly artificial world, served with a knowing wink (which nevertheless swept us up in its very real, very breathless emotions), could be borrowed from William Blake’s The Marriage of Heaven and Hell: “Enough! Or too much.”

In his own way, the brilliant theater director Alex Timbers—whose work includes Bloody Bloody Andrew Jackson, Here Lies Love, and, most recently, Beetlejuice—was born to reinvent Moulin Rouge! for the stage, as another generation of New York audiences will discover when his electrifying, eye-popping, and blissfully over-the-top adaptation of Luhrmann’s masterpiece opens on Broadway, after a smash run in Boston, this month.

“I’ve spent my life taking classics and interpreting them in radical ways,” Luhrmann says, “so how could I not applaud someone taking a work of mine and interpreting it in a radical way? You have to interpret things for the time and place you’re in. In the end, it’s still a tragic opera, but Alex applies himself to it in such a dexterous way that there’s irony and fun and music and emotion.”

Luhrmann grew up in Herons Creek, a tiny, remote Australian town with a total of seven houses in it, where, he says, “if you didn’t have a good imagination and an ability to create worlds in your mind, you were lost.” Fortunately his family, which ran a gas station and a pig farm, also ran the local movie theater and had a black-and-white TV set (which showed exactly one channel), and Luhrmann devoured a steady diet of old movies, including musicals, with which he fell in love. His mother was a ballroom-dance instructor who started giving him lessons early, and his father insisted that Luhrmann and his siblings study painting and music. Before long he was staging little shows, performing magic tricks, making films with his father’s 8-millimeter camera, and acting in school plays.

Apparently it was the ideal upbringing to produce an artist of dazzling originality, one with a singular, idiosyncratic vision and an expansive playing field: film, theater, opera, commercials, music videos, pop songs. After the success of his first two films, Strictly Ballroom and Romeo + Juliet—both of which had healthy doses of movie-musical DNA encoded into their cinematic language—Luhrmann wanted to take on the genre itself. He and his co-writer, Craig Pearce, set their film in Belle Epoque Paris, in and around the legendary Moulin Rouge nightclub, telling a tragic love story straight out of verismo opera with the Orpheus legend—a young poet and musician travels to the underworld in search of his dead love, Eurydice, and is reunited with her only to lose her again, emerging forever changed—as its mythical underpinning.

But Luhrmann also had what he calls a “preposterous conceit” that allowed his Orpheus—a Bohemian poet named Christian, played by Ewan McGregor—to metaphorically enchant the very rocks and stones to follow him because of his voice: “When our poet opens his mouth, ‘The hills are alive with the sound of music’ comes out of it,” he says. “Whether you like The Sound of Music or not, it’s a giant hit that’s got artistic cred—so it’s a funny, concise way of saying ‘The guy has magic.’” Preposterous or not, the conceit turned the love story between McGregor’s Christian and Nicole Kidman’s doomed Satine, a nightclub star and courtesan, into a pop fantasia, giving the music its audience had grown up with—from “Your Song” to “Lady Marmalade”—an operatic grandeur.

Luhrmann had long wanted to bring Moulin Rouge! to the stage but felt that he wasn’t the right person for the job—he worried that he was too close to the material and might be overprotective of it. Enter Alex Timbers, 40, a downtown wunderkind who has brought the cheeky, postmodern spirit of his theater company Les Freres Corbusier to Broadway and shares with Luhrmann a restlessly playful and inventive mise-en-scène. “When I saw Bloody Bloody Andrew Jackson, I could tell that his aesthetic and the way he told a story—very high-energy, very theatrical, ironic but also moving—had a certain kinship with mine,” Luhrmann says. “And after I met him, I knew that he would have his own interpretation but also understand the language of the film.”

The biggest challenge Timbers and his team faced was how to bring the film’s hypercinematic exuberance alive on a stage. “We had to create a visceral and kinetic excitement using an entirely theatrical vocabulary,” Timbers says. “We don’t have any of those virtuosic techniques like close-ups and Steadicam and music video–style editing, but you want the show to be able to leap over the footlights—emotionally, but also as a spectacle. So we use a lot of techniques to do that.”

Do they ever. From the moment you enter the theater, it’s clear that Timbers has realized his mandate to make the show—which he’s been working on for the past six years—“360.” It’s as if you’ve walked into the Moulin Rouge itself, courtesy of the gorgeously overwhelming set (by Derek McLane) that greets you: There are hearts within hearts, chandeliers, the stage flanked by a windmill on one side and an elephant on the other. Then out come the corset-clad boys and girls of the night (who come in all colors, shapes, and sizes) and the fashionable members of the Parisian demimonde in Catherine Zuber’s fabulous costumes. The next thing you know, “Four Bad Ass Chicks from the Moulin Rouge,” as the script identifies them—propelled onstage by Sonya Tayeh’s wildly exuberant choreography—are belting “Hey sista, go sista, soul sista, flow sista,” and we’re off to the races. “I wanted to build this exotic, intoxicating world that felt beautiful and dangerous and gritty and sexy,” Timbers says. “It felt really important for the sets and the costumes to use period elements, and for us to be ruthless about that, but to put them in a form that feels contemporary and surprising.”

The seven-time Tony-winning costume designer Zuber (The King and I, My Fair Lady) has done that and then some, tipping her hat to Catherine Martin’s designs for the film without imitating them. She’s even managed to design Belle Epoque finery that allows the dancers the freedom of movement to execute Tayeh’s propulsive choreography. Zuber is also a master of using costumes to reveal character and situation, as with the ornate gown she designed for Satine after she becomes the Duke’s courtesan and enters his glittering world. Inspired by designs from John Galliano’s 2006 couture collection, it features a bodice that looks like a cage and three rows of lacing down the back. “It’s almost like she’s a prisoner,” Zuber says.

Playing Satine this time around is Karen Olivo (West Side Story, Hamilton), who brings very different qualities to the role than Kidman, both physical (Olivo is a woman of color) and temperamental (desperate, determined, and down-to-earth, as opposed to ethereal). Aaron Tveit (Next to Normal, Catch Me if You Can), meanwhile, sings like a dream and brings the requisite dewy idealism to the naive Christian, but with a hint of something edgier.

The story is very much the same as the film’s: Satine is the star attraction at the Moulin Rouge, owned by the rapacious Harold Zidler (Danny Burstein), who is in financial hot water and in danger of losing the club. Christian and Satine meet and fall head over heels, but she has been promised by Zidler to the villainous Duke (Tam Mutu), who can give her the bejeweled life she’s always dreamed of, forcing her to choose between that and true love. Meanwhile, Christian and his pals Santiago and Toulouse-Lautrec (Ricky Rojas and Sahr Ngaujah) are writing a show, bankrolled by the Duke, that is meant to save the Moulin Rouge from going under. Then, of course, Satine has this persistent cough and . . . well, you know.

The big difference in terms of the storytelling is that book writer John Logan (Red) has fleshed out and deepened the characters and the relationships between them. “We looked at the major characters, asked what their backstories were, and tried to figure out how grounded they could possibly be in psychological realism and yet still be heightened in that way that musical theater demands,” Logan says. “How did Satine get to be this sparkling diamond—and what’s the price she’s paid along the way?”

But the boldest change—and in many ways the heart of the show—is in the new songs, which give Moulin Rouge! fresh emotional resonance (and whip the crowd into a frenzy). Along with the familiar Bowie, Madonna, and Elton John tunes, expect to hear from the likes of Outkast, Sia, Beyoncé, Fun, Adele, and Lorde, to name but a few (there are more than 70 songs in the show). To curate Moulin Rouge!’s dizzying playlist, Timbers, Logan, and music director/genius Justin Levine holed up in a Times Square hotel room with a digital keyboard, dredged up their musical memories, and took note of what worked. Their taste is impeccable, whether using a song for its sheer exuberance, as with a rousing version of Lady Gaga’s “Bad Romance,” or to reveal a character’s inner desires, as Satine does with Katy Perry’s “Firework.”

Logan has been blown away to see how powerfully audiences have connected with the show—and the songs. “I went to a wedding recently, and when the dancing started, I heard half our score being played, which was wild,” he says. “And when you see audience members respond to the songs—‘They’re using thatsong? Oh, my God! No way!’—you can feel how excited they are. It’s an experience I’ve never had before. It’s magic.”

#moulin rouge #aaron tveit #karen olivo #danny burstein #vogue #Baz Lurhmann #moulin rouge broadway #moulin rouge musical #vogue magazine #articles #features #ricky rojas #tam mutu #sahr ngaujah #robyn hurder #jacqueline b arnold #jeigh madjus #holly james

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un-deux-zero-quatre · 4 years

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“come be my teacher”

→ pairing: kim seokjin x (f) reader → genre: fluff, crack, if you squint it’s slow-burn → part i: 2,208 words → author note: inspired by a cute TA and my miserable effort in a korean language course while studying abroad. unlike y/n’s bold self. i never actually made efforts to get to know boys on campus, but then again i was never blessed to attend school with worldwide handsome jin. this is my first fic so hopefully you enjoy it, let me know what you think :)

(gif found on sbs website)

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You dabbed at the sweat droplets that formed on your forehead as the elevator to the sixth floor dinged to signal its arrival (fucking finally, you thought to yourself). You stepped out alongside a few other students heading towards room 605 for intro to Korean. A student sitting on the floor with his back against the windowed wall caught your peripheral. You glanced in the most casual manner you could pull off, but he was too busy looking down at his phone and you were forced to keep walking in the throng of students in the busy hallway. He looked cute, but honestly, half the campus was attractive boys that never gave you the light of day. Plus, having hiked half a mountain and power walked a large portion of your campus, the only thing on your mind was finding a seat to sink into, getting your heavy backpack off your sore shoulder, and downing the ice cold water in your HydroFlask. Not another cute boy who would ignore you. You made a beeline for a desk near the middle of the room, next to the giant windows. After not so carefully dumping your backpack on the desk table, you reached over to pull the window open, wondering why the hell you thought that wearing a long sleeve hoodie over black leggings during spring in Seoul seemed liked a good idea when you got dressed this morning. “I think my last brain cell stopped functioning the minute it started getting warmer,” you say to your deskman and friend, who is immersed in her music but gives you a sympathetic smile. Being that it was just the first week back to school, the classroom was still half empty. Most students would likely pile in gradually after managing to find the correct classroom… Yonsei was not exactly a small campus. Even local students found it difficult at times to navigate the famous campus.

You took this as an opportunity to lazily get going on the notes projected on the board. It was mostly stuff you’d get on the syllabus anyway, but you figured it wouldn’t hurt to have a digital copy; you did have a knack for misplacing important documents when you needed them the most and you did not want to have to suffer anymore than you anticipated from a course titled ‘Survival Korean.’ Despite having lived in the capital city for a couple months, your Korean had barely progressed from being able to order coffee and read instagram captions. Err, 70% of some instagram captions. So here you were at 8:45 am on this warm and cloudy day, sitting next to your practically fluent friend, mentally playing off your anxiety about being forced to brokenly speak in front of people who probably were only taking the class for an easy A. Before you knew it the professor was calling for attention to commence the class. You barely listened but maintained eye contact and nodding confidently to assert dominance. At least thats what you thought your half-assed efforts were doing for you. “Throughout the following weeks you’ll be working closely with a group of hand selected TA’s who will help you on your weekly tasks. They have worked hard to prepare engaging activities for all of you so please look forward to their lessons.” He signaled at a few older students scattered across the wall opposite to your seat, who flashed friendly smiles or lifted their hands up to identify themselves. You scanned and your eyes fell on one boy with wispy bangs and a soft pout on his lips.

Your one brain cell, as lame as it was at times, immediately recognized him as the boy who was sitting outside the classroom before class started. Getting a better chance at seeing his features you realized he was lowkey more handsome than other boys you’d seen on campus. Everyone knew Yonsei was notorious for attractive and bougie students but you did not expect to have a TA that looked like an Oscar nominated actor. You wondered if he was as kind as his eyes presented, or if he was a case of reverse-bitch face. You were brought back to consciousness when he turned and your eyes connected. You remained expressionless when his plump lips curved upward slightly. You felt your chest clench of embarrassment and quickly shifted your eyes at other students, focusing on each one for a few seconds to play off the fact that you were obviously drooling for this stranger. Why did you feel yourself burning up? It’s not like you have never seen a pretty boy. You weren’t the type to get so worked up over that. You cringed at yourself for feeling so affected that you didn’t even notice the professor had finished talking and students were shuffling to put their stuff away.

You felt your friend poke your arm, “Dude, let’s go.” You looked up at her and slammed your MacBook shut. “Oh— yeah sure! Do you have class right now?” She looked at her phone and groaned, “Ugh, I still have a whole hour before it starts. Let’s go chill somewhere.” Swinging your backpack over your shoulder you followed her out the classroom’s back exit, lowering your gaze to fiddle with your AirPod case just in case another opportunity for you to make an ass of yourself presented itself. You snapped the case open, swinging your hair around to plop the earphone in, missing handsome boy who was standing by the podium by the front door, watching you with curiosity, a tiny smile once again on his lips.

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“I seriously cannot believe we never realized they sell kaya toast here! Why do we always play ourselves?!” your friend sighed as you trudged up the massive concrete steps to Daewoo Annex Hall. “Maybe it’s because we always insist on going off campus to our fave cafe, we just can’t help being so loyal.” The main floor was buzzing with the loud chatter of students mingling in between classes, many of them ordering or waiting for their ritualistic iced Americanos to be served. You joined the short line to order, glancing at the menu above the case of baked goods. Your mind foggily drifted back to handsome boy from earlier. You wondered if he found you weird for staring so intently. By no means did you have a resting bitch face, but your natural expression doesn’t exactly scream approachability.

Though it had only been a few seconds of staring, you recall how sparkly his eyes had been. His wispy hair framed them perfectly, and alongside his dark eyelashes it was no surprise you were so immediately entranced… You caught yourself; who can even manage to look that attractive so early in the day?! Since when did good looks even mean that much to you? He was probably an asshole anyway, using the TA position only to exert power over undergrads who couldn’t afford do much but beg for mercy during office hours and rant online about shitty policies.

You felt your nose scrunching up into a frown when a loud laugh brought you back to the present moment. Looking down from the menu to the register you noticed a wavy haired, uniform clad barista throwing his head back at what seemed to be the funniest joke in the world. He flashed a boxy smile at whoever was leaned over the bar waiting for their coffee all while his hands expertly handled the register, tucking away won bills and passing a receipt to the customer who just finished ordering.

“Wow, I guess all the cute boys decided to torture us today,” your friend whispered, raising her eyebrow at you. You couldn’t even try to argue with her, this boy definitely contributed to evidence that only attractive students attended Yonsei… kind of like how handsome boy did as well… As if the universe had heard your mind ruminating, and decided it was time to intervene, the person leaned over the counter turned to look in your direction, and you had to bite your tongue to not gasp when those sparkly brown eyes connected with yours.

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You know those cheesy rom-coms where the protagonist finally meets her true love (or whatever) for the first time and the world magically melts away so that it’s only the two of them? Or how in Bollywood movies when the heroine locks eyes with the bad boy love interest and boom, cue sensual but still cute song with perfectly timed choreography? You loved that shit but never for one second believed it applied to the real world.

So why, God why, did you feel like time had stopped the second his eyes met yours and nothing else, especially not your midday politics class, mattered? “Hey! You’re one our teachers for survival Korean, right?” Your friend’s voice cut through your bizarre cinematic moment. She had stepped forward to order while she greeted none other than mister handsome boy. Although it had felt like an eternity, only a few seconds had transpired so the odds of you looking like a blithering idiot to others was very slim. “Yeah, you have a good eye, there’s about 10 of us there,” he smiled at your friend. “Are you both in the class? My name’s Seokjin, I’ll be teaching the lesson in a couple weeks.” You friend shot a quick smile at him and turned to the barista to order. You glanced quickly at her, the barista whose name tag read Taehyung, and then back at handsome b— err, Jin.

Since both your friend and Taehyung were busy in a transaction, you had no choice but to keep the conversation alive. “Uhh yeah, we are… my name is ____,” your eyes finally settled on his. He straightened up from the coffee bar, starching his arms up and brushing the back of his head.

Fuck, he was tall.

“Are you gonna order coffee, too? Speaking of, where’s mine? Ya! Tae!” He motioned over at the register and you remembered the sole reason for you climbing a steep hill 10 minutes away from your next classroom. You mumbled a soft oh, thanks and faced back to the register to order. It looks like Taehyung had abandoned his spot to make Jin’s drink, so a kind-eyed but sleepy girl took your order instead.

Stuffing your loose change back in your cardholder you made your way over to the main lobby where your friend stood with Jin and two other boys. “Ugh, I think I’ve had enough of feeling awkward for today,” you thought as you slowed down your steps. Always a queen with perfect timing, as you arrived you heard Tae scream out Jin’s name and order and Jin waved goodbye. “See you next week! Don’t forget to pick up a good notebook!”

“What,” you deadpanned as your friend turned on her heel to stare at you with an expression you only saw when stumbling across an aesthetic new cafe.“What are the odds of us getting such a hot TA for the easiest class ever?! And he’s not a complete jerk, wow.” HA, your lips pursed out as your inner monologue from an hour ago quickly flashed in your find. “I mean, maybe now he’s nice before he actually gets to teach us, what if he completely switches up? Also excuse me, but easiest class ever if you already speak Korean only! I’m not ready to take L’s in front of everyone,” your hands ran through your hair as you plopped down on a couch. “It’ll be fine, maybe Jin can be your motivation.” If the eyes emoji were based on anything, no doubt it was your friends iconic expression. As you opened your mouth to protest she dove away back to the coffee bar for your drinks.

Blowing air out gently from your pursed lips you dwelled on what’s to come. Okay… maybe if you kept an open mind the class (and this very specific TA) wouldn’t be so awful. You did choose to come abroad to a country where didn’t speak the language in hopes of eventually becoming fluent, after all. What good would negativity do? And anyway, it’s not like Jin would be teaching the entire course, so he probably wouldn’t even be able to clock how awkward he made you act (not that you understood either, its not the first time you see a cute boy.) As your friend came back holding two iced caramel macchiatos you resolved to just be as gentle on yourself as possible this semester. You had faced high stress and lost enough sleep last semester over things that were not worth it in the long run, and the thought of handling things the same way again felt draining. Even if it meant looking like a dumbass in front of the class asking wtf anything meant after reading a wall of text, you were going to put in effort in doing well to avoid issues later on and nothing was going to distract you. Not even soft, perfectly messy hair or pretty brown eyes or pillowy lips that curled around words so perfectly you had to restrain yourself from daydreaming.

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wigwurq · 5 years

Text

WIG REVIEW: STRANGER THINGS 3

Stranger Things season 3 is here!!!!! Bust out your 80s nostalgia and demogorgon attitude because I fully don’t remember where we left off but Netflix kind of reminded me in a very extended recap that was definitely too long? Whatever, let’s just discuss the wigs! (AND MUCH MORE).

As with last season (and any season of TV I review) I will be adding each episode to this post and then changing my wig verdict as the season progresses.

CHAPTER ONE: SUZIE DO YOU COPY?

We begin with two tweens making out and YUCK I really don’t want to live through this! I share this opinion with Sheriff Hopper who has to live through these make out sessions that are scored by 80s soft rock music. Even more insulting: THESE HAIRCUTS. I don’t know at what point these kids are gonna outgrow their bowlcuts but the answer seems to be a resounding: NEVER. Also Elle’s hair has finally grown out! TO THIS?!?!?! What overprocessed curly nightmare is this?! I feel like they were going for a Jennifer Grey situation but if that’s the case, I’ll be needing like 110% more hairspray and like 200% more dancing ability, please.

Anyway, the real news in town is: THERE’S A MALL NOW! It’s called Starcourt which is the most 80s sounding name ever and it is home to SCOOPS AHOY ice cream shoppe where Steve and Uma Thurman/Ethan Hawke’s daughter works. This whole storyline is incredibly Fast Times at Ridgemont High themed but Steve’s hair is still very wonderful. Also he can get all the tweens into the movie theater which is showing Day of the Dead and I get it Stranger Things: YOU ARE MAKING ALL THE 80S MALL REFERENCES.

Also: Dustin is back from camp! It was a science camp called Camp KNOW where and I am definitely gonna see some assholes in this shirt this summer. Anyway, this storyline was all about Dustin forcing his friends into helping him with a radio tower to talk to his possibly fake girlfriend named Suzie and truly: meh.

Meanwhile: WINONA’S SEASON 3 WIG! I’ve gotta say, this season is the best season of wig for Winona. Sure, it is still very much a mess (as is she after the untimely death of her boyfriend Rudy Reuttiger!) but it’s the best wig she’s had so far so MAZEL!

Elsewhere, the most boring teen couple in America (aka Nancy and Will’s brother whose name I won’t learn) are working at the local newspaper and Nancy’s whole job seems to be fetching hamburgers for an entire room of #MeToo examples. Her hair is business chick 80s which is to say: on brand but I could use about 90% more Working Girl, please.

And now let’s get to the only storyline I truly cared about: Nancy’s mom Karen Wheeler (aka Carla Buono). Every season, her wig brings the drama and glamour I crave in an 80s-based TV show. The arc of her wig story is truly the story of America - from 70s disco queen to bored early 80s housewife to the wig we see today - 80s mall glamour queen. AND I AM HERE FOR IT. She and the other ladies of the Hawkins Town Pool are unfortunately here for the worst character on this show: BILLY.

UGH BILLY. I will give this show major props for having his entrance to the same music playing when Phoebe Cates gets out of the pool in Fast Times (second Fast Times reference in this episode tho) but it’s a gender reversal I can definitely get behind. HOWEVER BILLY IS THE WORST. Within 2 seconds of his entrance, he fat shames a tweenager and also HAS THE WORST WIG.

Nothing has changed much from last season on this wig front. It is still very much a curly dried out MESS which is very much trying to reference Rob Lowe in St. Elmo’s Fire yet this bish has yet to wail on a saxophone or talk about granny panties so truly: no redeeming qualities here.

This does not dissuade Carla Buono from falling under the spell of Billy’s terrible wig. To be fair, her husband is a constantly napping Reagan supporter of indeterminate middle age. Anyway, the episode ends with her getting 80s GLAMOUROUS for a latenight rendezvous with Billy at a fleabag hotel. Billy, however, is run off the road by falling/exploding rats (?) and then dragged into a dirty warehouse full of said exploding rats which truly is the fate I wanted for him and his bad rattail so: COSIGN.

CHAPTER TWO: MALL RATS

We begin with Billy in the rat-infested warehouse being very much alive, so already: I’M ANGRY WITH THIS EPISODE. However, Billy and his awful wig have definitely been through the ringer and he’s about to high-tail it out of there when he comes face to face with: HIMSELF?!?! I don’t know what sort of US crossover this is supposed to be...can we get Jordan Peele on the horn about this? Anyway, he drives out of there in his now somehow completely fine car that didn’t work about 5 minutes ago and then stops at the most bizarrely situated telephone booth literally in the middle of nowhere. I thought this might be a Bill & Ted crossover but nope: he just tries to call 911 before all the electricity bails on that plan.

In other telephone news, Mike has been shook to his core by Sheriff Hopper and tells Elle that he can’t see her and makes up some lies about his grandma. Queen on the scene/his mom Karen and her GLAMOROUS PERFECTION WIG are somehow listening in (KAREN!!!!) and she’s concerned about grandma now too. Everyone back at the pool is concerned about Billy/”Billy” (not sure if he’s the real thing or a mole person version or a possessed alien version - probably the latter) and he is straight up RUDE to Karen so definitely: EFF YOU BILLY ALWAYS. There are also a bunch of shots of the back of his nightmare wig that gave me the shivers. Oh, and he fully kidnaps the other lifeguard as a human sacrifice to a demogorgon blob so definitely: EFF YOU BILLY x100000.

This episode also introduced MAYOR CARY ELWES! This is very good casting and this whole storyline seems like an homage to Jaws so: OK! Also Sheriff Hopper asked Winona’s season 3 wig (which is still good!) on a date/nondate which she definitely didn’t attend because she had far more important lessons to learn about magnets and that’s probably the best reason to stand up a dude ever.

Elsewhere, boring couple is investigating some weird rat/fertilizer situation at an old lady’s house and basically I didn’t pay attention to this part because it was boring and it involved exploding rats so: hard pass. Nancy’s hair looked fine. Jonathan’s hair is a mess. The end.

The rest of the episode was devoted to the only kind of rats I like: MALL RATS! Over at Scoops Ahoy, my favorite bromance between Steve and Dustin was rekindled and truly it is a beautiful thing.

However, Maya Hawke and her language skills (which are romance based, not Russian but whatever!) come into play to translate the Soviet message Dustin intercepted. They somehow translate it (SURE?) and also Maya’s hair is about as 80s as John Travolta’s 70s costumes were in 50s-set Grease. This hair is pure 2019 and you do you Stranger Things. THE DEMOGORGON’S IN THE DETAILS ALWAYS.

Meanwhile, Mike is BUMMED about having to lie to Elle so he brings Lucas and Will along with him to the mall to...buy something for Elle to erase the lie he told her? The whole time Will kept asking when they could leave and play D&D and the whole time I wanted these boys to not have bowl cuts anymore.

In the most important storyline, Elle teamed up with Max to have a LADIES DAY AT THE MALL AND I WAS HERE FOR IT! Max does not seem like the kind of chick who is into fashion or commercialism but her overriding guidance of finding yourself through consumerism and forsaking any sad feelings about boys is just good TV. Retail therapy is great!

And I’m sorry but there is absolutely no better cinema than an 80s makeover montage to effing MATERIAL GIRL. YES PLEASE.

Elle also used her powers to prank some asshole chicks at the Orange Julius and this whole part of the show felt very Girls Just Want To Have Fun (the movie but I guess also the song) so VERY YES PLEASE.

THEY EVEN TOOK EFFING GLAMOUR SHOTS. CAN YOU EVEN?! THIS IS EVERYTHING! I don’t know who funded this amazing afternoon at the mall since Max’s parents seem like pretty absentee wrong-side-of-the-tracks types and clearly this whole mall fiasco goes against everything Sheriff Hopper stands for but whatever logic: YAY MALL!

In the end, Elle calls out Mike on his lie and DUMPS HIS ASS! GIRL POWER! MALL POWER! ICE CREAM POWER 4EVER!

CHAPTER THREE: THE CASE OF THE MISSING LIFEGUARD

My favorite bromance, Dustin and Steve, are on the hunt for Russians in the mall! This whole plot is ridiculous and wonderful. They think they’re really onto something here (and maybe they are?) and just need to find some guy with blonde hair and a duffle bag (like all Russians!) When they find someone who fits that description, he turns out to be a FABULOUS aerobics instructor and I like what everyone has done here with the gay or European? trope.

Meanwhile, Hopper comes home from being stood up with bottle of Chianti and general sense of hopelessness when everything takes a turn for the GREAT because Elle isn’t making out with Mike - she’s found a great galpal and they’re having a sleepover. Halleluj all over the place! Elle deserves a great galpal and Max is pretty awesome and can ALMOST land an ollie so I say amen. Winona’s season 3 wig (still great!) shows up and explains about magnets and then they go back to the lab and find an actual Russian (not an aerobics instructor!) but then he hightails it out of there with no other explanation other than the fact that he might be the Terminator and/or just a motorcycle enthusiast.

Anyway, Elle and Max have the best sleepover EVER by using Elle’s sensory deprivation skills to spy on the boys and truly this is the What Men Want crossover no one wanted but sure! (PS the answer is Doritos belches and farts UGH BOYS).

Beyond that, what Will wants is to just play D&D IN THIS GODDAMNED ELEGANT CAPE, OK?! Mike and Lucas go along with it for a bit, but they are just too girl crazy to concentrate on being a nerd for long. Mike yells at Will, “it’s not my fault you don’t like girls” which is interesting phraseology since the internet really wants Will to be gay and only time will tell but honey: the cape eleganza story you’re serving is pretty fabulous, just sayin! (THE DEMOGORGON’S IN THE DETAILS ALWAYS).

Anyway, after some fun sensory deprivation visions of the guys doing stupid stuff, Elle and Max decide to invent a whole spin-the-bottle inspired game to see what other dudes in Hawkins are up to and dammit if the bottle didn’t land on my wig nemesis BILLY. Elle sees that he’s up to some pretty effed up nonsense involving kidnapping that other lifeguard so they decide to investigate IN THE RAIN.

The rest of the episode is mainly devoted to fabulous 80s raincoat fashion and I WAS HERE FOR IT. Beyond these great raincoat lewks, most of the rest of the cast also rocked some fab 80s raincoats (excepting Will who got soaked destroying his childhood fort and Steve who OF COURSE was wearing a members only jacket but jokes on him bc that rain totally dented his ‘do).

Anyway, Elle and Max go over to the missing lifeguard’s house and OF COURSE her dad is the #1 asshole that boring couple works with (oh also they did more boring investigating which resulted in an old lady eating fertilizer. Meh). But shocker: BILLY AND HIS AWFUL WIG WERE THERE TOO.

LOOK AT THE SIDE OF THIS DAMN WIG. Truly, this wig IS the demogorgon of this season.

Anyway, double shocker: THE LIFEGUARD ALSO WAS THERE! Or I guess a possessed version of her since this plotline is getting less US and more Invasion of the Body Snatchers (no need to return my call anymore, Jordan Peele). Also possession or not, this chick’s side pony and wispy bangs are the true terrors (second only to Billy’s wig).

Also can we talk about Billy’s mustache for a second? IT IS SO DISGUSTING. That’s all I have to say. I don’t want to look at it any further. Also look at how dried out this wig is and this whole episode involves torrential rain. I DEMAND MORE WIG HUMIDITY DAMMIT.

Anyway, Max and Elle (smartly) hightail it out of there right before Billy and the lifeguard attack her parents for further demogorgon possessions and we get one last terrifying view of Billy’s wig. HORRIFYING.

CHAPTER FOUR: THE SAUNA TEST

So I’m really liking the whole Elle and Max vibe going along here. I also like that they weren’t dissuaded by the whole Billy being a possessed demogorgon thing to spoil their sleepover. IT CONTINUES! And not only that, Max is literally introducing WONDER WOMAN TO ELLE. I could watch an entire episode of this also because both of their hair isn’t too offensive and they’ve both discovered scrunchies. Mazel! But of course, the guys call in a code red and they have to hightail it over there to fix everything. Ain’t it always the way, ladies?

I would like to take a moment to talk about bowl cuts. So far, I have just lumped both Will and Mike’s bowl cuts into “awful” territory as all bowl cuts are awful. However, this episode gets a lot of shots of the back of Will’s head (because the back of his neck is always sensing those goddamned demogorgons). Anyway, it became very clear in this episode just how terrible this wig is as opposed to Mike’s terrible bowl cut actual hair. I consulted the internet, and apparently the kid who plays Will CUT HIS HAIR (which he was contractually obligated NOT to do) days before shooting began and the wigmaster had to scramble and make a wig literally out of the childhood cut hair of one of her assistants. READ IT ALL HERE. Despite her hustle, this wig sucks in the way that all man wigs suck: the back taper is just all off!! And with all those closeups of Will’s neck it is VERY DISTRACTING!! Billy officially is not the only one with a terrible man wig this season. But his is still the worst!

It did hide a bit under this sweet NIAGARA FALLS hat this episode. And his oily bohunk body was hidden under this sweatshirt which was a dead giveaway to all the kids that SOMETHING WAS AMISS HERE since Billy can barely keep a shirt on at school let alone the pool. Since Will knows that demogorgons (specifically the mind flayer?) like it CHILL, everyone was all: THIS DUDE IS STRAIGHT UP POSSESSED. Great work, kids! Also honestly, this whole lewk was giving me Weekend At Bernies realness and I was here for it (since it implies that Billy is dead which I would like very much please).

Meanwhile, Hopper’s anger management issues get PEAK BLOODY when he just beats the shit out of Cary Elwes (who is technically kind of his boss?) in demanding answers about that Terminator/motorcycle enthusiast who beat the shit out of HIM last episode. Oh, and just an FYI: Winona’s season 3 wig was along for the ride and was still looking great! I cannot say the same for Cary Elwes’s face!

Over at Scoops Ahoy, Steve and his superior wigless mane are doing some serious air duct work with the help of Lucas’s precocious sister. This whole plotline begs the question: do any of the parents of Hawkins ever know where their kids are?

Meanwhile, boring couple is on the rocks after having a really boring fight about whether it’s worse to be a woman or poor and they called it a draw I guess? Anyway, I haven’t spent much time talking about Nancy’s hair which is starting to look a little lumpy honestly and the article I read (link above) told me the bizarre fun fact that most of this hair is real and permed (duh) but that part of the undercarriage is remnants from Winona’s season 1 wig which is obviously why it looks so shitty. The more you know!

Anyway, after being fired by the #metoo boss (who is now also demogorgon possessed) for wanting to investigate why that old lady with the fertilizer eating rats is now also eating fertilizer, she turned to her mom - the one and only queen of Hawkins glamour - KAREN WHEELER. LOOK AT THIS GODDAMNED PERFECT LEWK. Mama Karen ended up giving her a very great motivational pep talk that legit made me cry (SERIOUSLY) about how she had to keep fighting and get the world out about this effed up fertilizer situation. She also delivered a sick burn about her constantly napping husband. I LOVE YOU KAREN.

Back at the town pool, all the kids concocted a Home Alone-style booby trap to get Billy into the sauna, crank up the heat, and prove that there is a heat-hating demogorgon inside him. It kind of worked except they also almost died during the battle royale between Billy’s inner demon (literal this time) and Elle.

Also I know that I demanded wig humidity last time but this is NOT WHAT I MEANT OMG THIS WIG IS A GHOSTMARE. Anyway, Elle saved the day (duh) for now by throwing Billy through a brick wall like he was the Kool-Aid man but seems like he’s forming a demogorgon army of possessed mole people so seems like it’s gonna be one crazy summer, you guys!

CHAPTER FIVE: THE FLAYER

Straight off the bat: this was a weird episode because it included neither my least favorite wigwearer, Billy, nor (SOB) my favorite wig wearer, KAREN WHEELER. So we were left with a bunch of other randos, mainly Soviets. We begin with Winona’s season 3 wig (looking a little rough around the edges in this episode, I am sad to report) and Hopper, fresh off the info he beat out of Mayor Cary Elwes, high tailing it to some farm owned by The Terminator dude. Under his bed, they find a bunker with these two dudes in it. Good morning!

Terminator dude, obvs shows up fairly immediately and lots of yelling, guns, and machismo ensue. In the end, the Terminator is briefly subdued by a fallen bookshelf and Winona’s season 3 wig, Hopper, and one of the rando Soviets escape but not without car troubles because: of course?

After Hopper’s truck explodes, they are all forced to walk through the woods while Winona’s season 3 wig hilariously tries to ask the non-English-speaking Soviet dude about magnets. It’s all pretty silly stuff but I’m here for Winona’s season 3 wig to get some comedic scenes instead of long suffering Christmas light crying scenes.

Anyway, they find a 7-11 where a lot of product placement and caffeine takes place, as well as Hooper yelling a lot for no reason which is essentially his entire character this season. Get some anger management classes, dude! Also the rando Soviet gets a slushie so between that and Billy’s icee last episode: WHAT A TIME FOR FLAVORED ICE WATER!

My absolute favorite part of the episode came next when Hooper commandeered a sweet convertible from this yuppie asshole. I’m not sure how often police commandeer vehicles in real life but I love it when they do it in movies because it’s always taking a car from some pompous idiot who clearly doesn’t deserve to drive (see: Speed, So I Married An Axe Murderer, etc). You can’t get more pompous or idiotic than this yuppie (named Todd, of course?!) with both a popped Polo shirt AND a blazer with zhuzhed sleeves AND white pants. THE NERVE OF THIS GUY FOR EVEN EXISTING! PLEASE TAKE HIS CAR! OMG HIS LICENSE PLATE IS TDFTHR! EVERYTHING IS JUSTIFIED!

Then Hopper, Winona’s season 3 wig, and the rando Soviet drive directly to Murray’s compound in Illinois. I’m bummed we have to suffer through Murray and his existence again since I’ll never forgive him for the gross pull-out couch jokes he made about #boringcouple’s sex romp at his house but here we are. He DOES speak Russian so let’s just get through this translation. Oh and obviously the Terminator dude questioned the 7-11 clerk so he’s probably on his way to Murray’s house now, hopefully to kill him so I don’t have to suffer through any more of his gross sex jokes.

Meanwhile, the Scoops Ahoy spy crew are still locked in that elevator they took way into the bedrock of earth/logic but somehow manage to escape when some (more!) rando Soviets come to unlock some deliveries. Then they discover the whole Soviet plan to reopen the Upside Down while also not being noticed by one single Soviet (great security, dudes!) except for this one Soviet who Steve beats up (GO STEVE!) I’d also like to say that Steve’s superior wigless mane is truly wonderful in this episode. The lights from the underground labs really bring out his summer highlights and it’s truly a thing of beauty. Uma Thurman’s daughter continues to have a 2019 beach wave blunt instagram cut not welcome in this 80s narrative please but otherwise she’s fine.

Over with #boringcouple, they got back together I guess? Remember at the end of season 1 when we were all deeply offended that Nancy was still with Steve and NOT Will’s brother (I refuse to believe he has an actual name). How things have changed! If Steve ever took back Nancy, I would be personally DEEPLY OFFENDED so I guess it’s fine she’s just still a #boringcouple but it’s still boring you guys. Even more boring: the actors are a couple in real life and have been for years! I just found this out this week and found it DEEPLY BORING.

Anyway, #boringcouple teams up with the tween gang to solve this whole fertilizer eating mystery and Nancy totally mommed it up when she put her shitty perm back in a banana clip and told all the kids to buckle up so she could drive her parents’ wood-paneled station wagon and honestly this section felt very Adventures in Babysitting so I’ll allow it. Also Will’s bro’s hair always looks like it was cut by a weed wacker and I’m not sure if this is a comment on his socioeconomic plight but truly Winona’s season 3 wig should get her kids better haircuts please. If her wig can improve so can theirs. In any case, at the missing lifeguard’s house, they vaguely put together some blood-related clues and then decide to visit the fertilizer eating grandma in the hospital.

Only fertilizer eating grandma ain’t there, hunties! Also please return all those flowers to their vase, please. Instead, #boringcouple apologized to each other for their boring fight in an elevator and then had to fight two possessed #metoo bros from the newspaper (which was very satisfying) while Elle and Mike basically starred in an M&Ms commercial in the waiting room. I honestly was hoping that #boringcouple would get possessed too but they ended up being ok (SIGH) and the back of Will’s bowl cut wig sensed danger so I guess Elle is just gonna have to fix everything in the next episode or 3.

CHAPTER SIX: E PLURIBUS UNUM

We begin, UGH, with #boringcouple who are still battling with (part of?) the mind flayer in the hospital and Nancy gets very Sigourney Weaver in Alien and I thought she was about to get flayed but sadly Elle saved her ass. Back at Hooper’s bunker, the whole gang is still basically relying Elle for both protection and sensory deprivation recon. Nancy gels her hair up for some reason (I hope she used DEP!) and Will keeps getting the tingles on the back of his terrible bowl cut wig. Max and Mike have a battle royale about who cares about Elle more and whether women can make their own decisions about their own telepathic powers which Nancy rightfully weighs in on (you go gurl?) But honestly, no one was protecting Elle from the real catastrophe here: WEARING CRISS CROSS SUSPENDERS THE WHOLE GODDAMNED EPISODE. Suspenders are fine and I’m glad Elle has found fashion, but maybe the kids can elect one of them as Elle’s suspenders advocate to avoid this in the future?

Meanwhile, Terminator dude still hasn’t caught up with Murray (sadly) and everyone in his bunker is still very much alive, at least until they die of lung cancer (ZING!) Anyway, Murray does a lot of Russian translation, rando Soviet dude throws a diva fit about slurpee flavors, Hopper continues his reign of anger management/alcoholism problems, and Winona’s season 3 wig is honestly not looking great. They do somehow figure out what the Russians are doing under Starcourt (they even make diagrams and use a lot of Burger King product placement to reenact nuclear scanarios!) And Hopper calls a secure line to demand backup back in Hawkins. Okay?

Back in Hawkins, Bloody Bloody Cary Elwes seems to have recovered from Hopper’s beating pretty nicely (as long as he keeps those shades on) and is very much invested in the 4th of July county fair he is PRODUCING (he even made signs crediting himself!) The Terminator dude demands answers about Hooper but no matter: JUST ENJOY THIS FAIR RIDE!

Speaking of people getting face beatings, Steve is getting absolutely SAVAGED by the Soviets. It was honestly very heartbreaking because he has somehow become the male MVP of this show, partially to do with his hair god status (EVEN WITH A BLOODY FACE HIS HAIR LOOKS SO GREAT!) but also because he’s become a really sweet guy and I just want him to catch a damn break! (Tho please continue to be broken up with Nancy - dear god!)

We shouldn’t be too worried about him getting back together with Nancy, though, because if it wasn’t clear from the moment Uma Thurman’s daughter was introduced: THESE TWO ARE OBVS GETTING TOGETHER. Her hair is still a very 2019 distraction but she’s def an upgrade from Nancy. However, after taking some weird Soviet truth serum (probably just LSD, right?) she admits that she harbored a crush on him way back in the 10th grade and also totally undermines her cool outsider status by admitting that all losers want to be popular (I DON’T KNOW IF ALL LOSERS STAND BY THIS GURL I HOPE THIS IS JUST THE LSD TALKING!) This whole section gives a lot of Some Kind of Wonderful realness and honestly that is a lesser John Hughes work so I’m not sure I can give any of this a passing grade. However, Dustin and my new favorite sass machine, Erica save the day with a nuclear cow prod! GREAT WORK KIDS! ALSO YOUR PARENTS DEFINITELY DON’T CARE WHERE YOU ARE! Speaking of parents, yet again the glamour of KAREN WHEELER did not grace itself in this episode and we were all worse for it.

Back at Hopper’s cabin, Elle decides to go nuclear with her sensory deprivation recon and we all have to welcome BILLY (UGH BILLY) and his terrible wig back. Anyway, he pushes her further into the recesses of his memory/all logic on an astral plane that can only be described as the place where Michelle Pfeiffer was in the Ant-Man sequel (IF YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT HOW VERY DARE YOU). So we get a lot of terrible childhood flashbacks which try to show Billy’s abusive tendencies to be learned from his horrible upbringing and truly: DO NOT MAKE ME FEEL BAD ABOUT BILLY.

JUST LOOK AT THIS IDIOT. NO THANK YOU PLEASE. Despite the humidity of his entire body, his wig remains a dried out hellscape that I would love to never see again for the rest of my days. Also he almost traps Elle in the astral plane they’re on JUST LIKE MICHELLE PFEIFFER IN THAT ANT-MAN MOVIE) but she escapes into the arms of Mike (fine sure) and then Billy explains that he and and his army of mole people have been waiting for Elle this whole time and: REALLY? That seems very specific but you do you, mole people. Oh also all those mole people (grandma fertilizer included!) all file into the rat warehouse and shapeshift into a disgusting mind flayer/demogorgon/blob nightmare. YAY!

CHAPTER SEVEN: THE BITE

Welcome to the Fun Fair (a Mayor Cary Elwes production!) Somehow he recovered from his terrible face beating to show some FACE at this thing. The whole town is there and ready for some 4th of July FUN that will definitely not be ruined by Russians or demogorgons.

Most importantly, this episode gave us the triumphant return of KAREN WHEELER! HER HAIR LOOKS AMAZING! She is bringing full out bouffant glamour to the Fun Fair and damn if she didn’t have this lewk done at Dolly Parton’s salon in Steel Magnolias. IT IS THAT GOOD. Clearly employing the “higher the hair the closer to god” theory - and not just hair-wise actually because this bish bribed some carnie to stop the ferris wheel at its highest point so that she and her family (at least the part of her family whose whereabouts she knows about) can enjoy some FIREWORKS. KAREN YOU MINX I LOVE YOU! HOW ARE YOU STILL MARRIED TO THIS DUDE IN GOLF PANTS?!

The top of the ferris wheel is also a perfect place to see the incoming demogorgon!! The back of Will’s bowl cut is getting the tingles too. And before Elle can fully explain her trip into Billy’s beach memories, the mind flayer is THERE, y’all, busting through the roof of Hopper’s cabin like it’s straight out of a 50s b-movie. I would like to note that for ONCE Winona’s house isn’t about to get trashed so mazel! #Boringcouple armed themselves with guns and axes but obvs they prove completely useless and the flayer is about to steal Elle away when they make a human chain and are victorious...FOR NOW.

Meanwhile, Dustin and Erica are dealing with a very drugged up Steve and Uma Thurman’s daughter and decide to lay low in a showing of (WHAT ELSE?): Back to the Future! They actually show so much of this movie that I’m assuming the entire wig budget went straight to Robert Zemeckis.

Over in the TDFTHER convertible, Winona’s season 3 wig is looking a damn MESS as is all the side projection of them getting back to Indiana. There’s a lot of bickering between Winona’s season 3 wig and Hopper and finally my beloathed Murray has to meet his gross sex talk quota for the season and tells both of them to just have sex already and then he and the Soviet dude laugh a lot and OMG GET ME OUT OF THIS CONVERTIBLE.

#Boringcouple and the kids smash into a supermarket to get Elle some medical help for the leg that the flayer effed up. I’m not sure why a hospital wasn’t an option but it’s probably so there could be more 80s product placement like Mr. T cereal and a whole actual conversation about New Coke. Nancy’s hair is still VERY depped up. Max seems to have the most medical training from skateboard injuries and fixes Elle up pretty well while the dudes prove completely useless other than finding a treasure trove of fireworks. I guess most importantly, Elle was reunited with her ain’ true love: EGGOS. They hightail it out of there with a ton of fireworks that they definitely won’t (lol jk) use later. Oh and Elle’s blood kind of comes alive and Billy and his shitty wig come back to sniff her out. Gross.

Speaking of gross, Steve and Uma’s daughter left the very confusing (for them) screening of Back to the Future to go stare at the Starcourt ceiling to the point of barfing (which I honestly did not need to see TWICE or at all!) The barf did get the LSD out of their systems so now it’s time for truth talk and LURVE TALK! I really have to hand it to Steve for being completely face beaten and bloody and covered in barf and still having enough swagger to admit to Uma’s daughter that he has feelings for her (despite her 2019 hair) and just when I thought this show was so predictable, Uma’s daughter comes out as a LESBIAN!! What? Okay! To his credit, Steve pivots pretty easily to ally/friend and truly: HE IS THE BEST AND WE DO NOT DESERVE HIM. ALSO PLEASE GET HELP ON YOUR FACE WOUNDS AND YOUR HAIR STILL LOOKS GREAT.

NOR DO WE DESERVE THIS MUCH GLAMOUR TWICE IN ONE EPISODE. Karen Wheeler may look great but damn if she knows where her (or Winona’s season 3 wig’s) kids are. But let’s just enjoy this space ship ride! Also a rando carnie calls Hopper “Magnum” and: sick burn. Also there is a woman dressed up as Uncle Sam at the fun fair and between this drag king realness, Uma’s daughter, that one Jazzercise instructor, and (maybe/probably) Will, I’m so ready to throw a Hawkins Pride Parade. Karen is already wearing rainbow stripes!

Elsewhere at the fun fair, Alexei is having the time of his damn life winning a Woody Woodpecker with the support of 10000 children. Sadly, his joy is cut short when the Terminator dude kills him in cold blood. HARSH. Also Murray chooses to blame himself for not guarding him like he was supposed to and instead buying a corn dog. I AGREE, MURRAY: THIS IS YOUR FAULT PLEASE LEAVE. Then Hopper has a whole sequence with the Terminator dude (and some other rando Soviet baddies) in the funhouse which is the second time this season which felt like a weird homage to US and I guess I need to get Jordan Peele on the horn again about this. Anyway, Hopper gets ANOTHER face beating and so does Cary Elwes from Winona’s (also beat) season 3 wig.

Back at the mall, Steve and company are trying to just slip out with the rest of the movie crowd from Back to the Future but the Soviets are totally onto them and it looks like they’re about to be killed when (AGAIN) Elle saves the day by throwing a Chrysler LeBaron on them. GREAT WORK! Unfortunately, Elle is also receiving a threatening phonecall from a mini demogorgon and the call is coming from: INSIDE HER LEG.

CHAPTER EIGHT: THE BATTLE OF STARCOURT

So this demogorgon situation with Elle’s leg is pretty severe so Will’s brother (again name NOT NECESSARY) prepares for mall surgery based on stuff found at the Panda Express and literally gave her a wooden spoon to bite on as if this was happening during the Revolutionary War. The demogorgon leg removal is not working so as always, Elle just DID IT HERSELF because she may be the only capable person in this mall/town.

Hopper and Winona’s season 3 wig (not looking great) and (UGH) Murray show up and everyone compares notes on how to fix this whole mindflayer situation. Most importantly, Erica outsasses Murray and wins. Steve (rightly) gets the keys to the TDFTHER convertible to take him, Uma’s daughter, Dustin and Erica (now known as Scoops Troop) to Dustin’s radio tower. The rest of the tweens plus #boringcouple (now known as The Griswold Family because sure) are getting sent to Murray’s bunker and can’t they maybe stop and get Elle some medical attention on the way? No matter: they’re not going anywhere because Billy, possessed or not, still knows way too much about cars and stole their damn ignition cable. DAMMIT BILLY.

Steve is driving the Scoops Troop up a damn hill to the radio tower while listening to Jackie Wilson’s Higher and Higher which I’m sure is a Ghostbusters 2 reference and also Uma’s daughter looks exactly like her in the convertible driving part of Kill Bill and honestly all of these pop cultural references are getting tiring. Anyway, from the top of the radio tower, they can see the demogorgon closing in on the mall and Steve and Uma’s daughter hightail it back there.

At the mall, Elle is having some trouble moving that LeBaron to get the ignition cable - she can’t even move a damn coke can. WHAT GIVES? This does beg the question: since she has literally done all the heavy lifting this season, could she maybe call in a favor from her telepathic sister in Chicago? Why did this show even introduce that character - just to check off “punks” on their 80s pop culture list (note: DEFINITELY) But seriously, it’s like when Marvel makes a stand-alone superhero movie after an Avengers movie. SOMEONE GET THAT PUNK CHICK ON THE HORN!!! Anyway, Will gets some back of bowl cut tingles and the damn demogorgon smashes through the roof. Elle, Mike, and Max make a run for it through the gap, where the demogorgon confuses a mannequin wearing Elle’s same clothing and truly: the gap would NEVER sell this graphic eleganza! Did Esprit just not want to be involved in this whole mess because that is where she would have bought that. The rest of the tense gap scene plays out basically exactly like the kitchen scene in Jurassic Park. Meanwhile, #boringcouple is doing boring auto work while Billy just endlessly stalls in his evilmobile but is about to hit them when MVP hair god Steve saves the day and everyone piles into the station wagon. YAY!

Elsewhere, the Terminator dude has made it to the Soviet subbasement where Hooper, Winona’s season 3 wig and (UGH) Murray are now in Soviet apparel. Winona’s season 3 wig (looking great hidden under that hat) and Hopper have a nice talk and make plans for a legit date which definitely won’t be derailed by a demogorgon (lol jk jk). Murray manages to infiltrate the room where all the wires control the nuclear weapon the Soviets are using to open up the Upside Down and why wasn’t this room better guarded? Oh well. Much like sucking at guarding Soviets and not buying corndogs, Murray sucks at remembering important numbers which are the combination for the nuclear keys.

Of course the code is some nerdy equation that requires Dustin to ask fellow nerd (and girlfriend Suzie who exists!) for help. But not before Suzie demands that Dustin sing....The Neverending Story theme song. This is peak 80s cultural reference and we can all go home now. Also it is mainly an excuse for Galen Matarazzo to sing and sure: he and this chick sound great! Now please get those damn keys!

Elle, Max and Mike are confronted with (unfortunately still alive) Billy who beats the shit out of all of them and takes Elle. She’s about to get flayed when Lucas and Will throw all those damn fireworks on the demogorgon. Sure! Elle uses Billy’s memories to reason with him. This show definitely wants us to root for Billy all of a sudden because he turns on the demogorgon but I REFUSE TO LIKE BILLY WITH THAT DRIED OUT WIG IN THIS SWEATY MALL.

Back in the subbasement, Winona’s season 3 wig and Hopper are ready to end this but the Terminator dude shows up. They duke it out very close to a nuclear warhead while Winona’s season 3 wig turns into MacGuyver and uses a belt to try to disarm both keys and bless her. Hopper throws the Terminator into nuclear generator thingie. Byeeeeee. Then Hopper looks back at Winona’s season 3 wig for long enough to definitely make it back into the safe glass room where she is but instead just gives a really long nod, signalling her to disarm the nuclear whatever thing and he definitely (absolutely does not) die.

However, all my hopes and dreams for Billy’s death finally came true! YAY FOR ME AND MY HATRED OF HIS TERRIBLE WIG AND HIS CHARACTER WHICH HAD NO REDEEMING QUALITIES NO MATTER HOW MANY BEACH FLASHBACKS TRIED TO PROVE OTHERWISE. I will say that his exit is VERY METAL so in some ways, this was the only appropriate death for his Metallica and Tank loving character. FINE. Two seconds after he and the demogorgon die, the feds show up with Paul Reiser! I am honestly very mad at this show for not blasting Pat Benatar’s Little Too Late during this entire sequence. OH WELL. Outside the mall Winona’s season 3 wig and Will’s terrible bowl cut wig are reunited in a bad wig hug. Then Winona’s season 3 wig catches sight of Elle and gives her a look that says: I am definitely adopting you.

Three months later, a fake Inside Edition show gets us up to date on the burning of the mall, government coverups, and comeuppance of terrible mayor Cary Elwes. Also Uma’s daughter (now with 80s appropriate updo!) and Steve are trying to get jobs at the video store! Uma’s daughter and her love of Billy Wilder movies make her a shoe-in for the job but Steve's taste in the Ewok Star Wars movie and the 5 minutes he saw of Back To the Future whilst on LSD don’t make him the best candidate. Also he trips over a Phoebe Cates cut-out and truly Phoebe Cates: thank you for your service in being name-checked constantly this season. In the end, Steve’s awesome hair gets him the job. Maybe?

Meanwhile, Winona’s season 3 wig is moving just like she said she was going to this whole season and no one believed her. Also she put her wig back in a ponytail and: good move it looks ok! Elle still doesn’t have her powers back but eh? She does get a heart-tugging letter from beyond the grave (he’s totally still alive) and all the kids/tweens/#boringcouple sob that they are being separated. It isn’t clear where Winona’s season 3 wig is going or how she could have sold her shitty house in the town that fake Inside Edition show called haunted. And yes, separating her now 3 PTSD kids from their only support group is also shitty but what has this goddamned town ever done for Winona and any of her seasons’ wigs other than stealing her children and killing her love interests and trashing that shitty house at least twice?! I SAY GET THE HELL OUT OF THERE (they will fully be back next season).

After collectively sobbing all their faces off, the tweens of Hawkins are left only with the ELEGANZA OF KAREN WHEELER and whatever healthy dinner she’s preparing with the help of some white wine. YOU KIDS ARE STILL LUCKY WHO NEEDS FRIENDS WHEN YOU HAVE KAREN WHEELER! Oh and back in Russia, Hopper is like 110% definitely still alive. See y’all next season!

FINAL VERDICT: DOESN’T WURQ (YOU KNOW IT WAS BILLY’S FAULT)

#wigwurq #doesntwurq #strangerthings #hawkins #UGHBILLY #80sMALLWIGS #KARENWHEELER #EXPLODINGRATS #EXPLODINGRATTAILS #retailtherapy #glamourshots #girlsjustwanttohavefun #mallpower #raincoatfashions #wighumidity

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aion-rsa · 5 years

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Marvel's What If: The Stories We'd Like to See

https://ift.tt/2HjKQlR

The new animated series will show us alternate takes on the Marvel Cinematic Universe's timeline. Here are scenarios for every Marvel movie.

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This Marvel article contains spoilers.

When Disney+ hits, one of the many shows tying into the Marvel Cinematic Universe is What If, set to be on-demand in summer 2021. The show will be animated, albeit using many of the actors from the various MCU movies. Based on the What If comic series, which was created in the '70s, the anthology series has a pretty basic concept: take an important part of Marvel history, zig when the original story zagged, and then write a story out of that.

For instance, the comic had an issue where Spider-Man saw the thief who would eventually kill Uncle Ben run by and figured that stopping him would be good PR. He unknowingly saved Uncle Ben’s life in this scenario, but he didn’t learn any major lesson about power and responsibility. Instead, he became a more self-centered ass whose ego was so out of hand as a media personality that he caused a disgraced J. Jonah Jameson to found the Sinister Six as a revenge ploy.

In the case of the new animated series, the stories will be based on the movies’ continuity. So far, we know that one of them will be about Agent Carter receiving the super-soldier serum treatment instead of Steve Rogers.

That got me thinking about what other stories we can get from the movies. I’ve decided to take every Marvel movie and brainstorm a What If scenario that would work for each. Play along at home! It’s fun!

IRON MAN

What If Tony Stark Died?

The story of the movie ends where it should have begun. Tony Stark and his military entourage are under attack and a bomb goes off near Stark. The shrapnel cuts too close to his heart and there’s nothing that can be done. Obadiah Stane takes over the company. Maybe Pepper, Happy, and/or Rhodey investigate and take him down. Maybe not.

What’s important is that Iron Man can no longer be the focal point of the MCU. Presumably, things are going to get really, really bad. Especially with that time the High Council tried to nuke New York City. Then again, greedy as he is, Stane would be on Earth’s side during that conflict and could probably at least lend some kind of hand.

In a world without Stark, I can’t help but think of what all those villains created BECAUSE of Stark would be like. Imagine Loki conquering Earth and being undone by the likes of Stane, Vanko, Killian, Vulture, and Mysterio. Not Hammer, though. He’d still be a total weasel and would try to betray them at the first attempt.

INCREDIBLE HULK

What If Abomination Joined the Avengers?

A plot thread the MCU movies played with briefly before writing it off in a Blu-ray short was the idea of The Incredible Hulk's Emil Blonsky being roped into joining the Avengers. Obviously, he ended up getting nixed because he kind of went on a big rampage through Harlem, but maybe if things went down differently, he would be found less accountable...at least in the beginning.

Before Bruce Banner gets his treatment from Sterns, he might find out about all the horrible experiments he was working on and that would set off the Hulk. A surviving Sterns would still gladly transform Blonsky, only this time Blonsky would be seen as a hero for putting his body on the line so he can bring down the Hulk. With the military behind him, he’s able to win and keeps his dark side in check enough that he’s able to work with the government and be their personal weapon of mass destruction.

The way I see it, this could go very wrong during the events of Avengers. The team is going to be at each other’s throats as is, but in the original version, they were still good people. When there’s a psychopath in the midst, this can only end badly.

Poor Cap, finding out that this guy is his legacy.

IRON MAN 2

What If Iron Man Wanted to Avenge His Father?

When in doubt, go with the Soviet-controlled alternate reality. Worked for Superman and Valiant Comics. It would certainly work for Iron Man 2.

In this scenario, Anton Vanko is able to keep his intentions to himself long enough to screw over Howard Stark, bring the arc reactor schematics to the Motherland, and reap the rewards. Ivan lives a life of luxury while Howard Stark becomes a disgraced figure in the American public’s eye, ultimately destroying himself through alcoholism.

This leads to a story where Tony Stark figures out his father's tech in order to wage a war against the Vankos for destroying his family. Add in Justin Hammer as his weasely sidekick and you got a stew going.

THOR

What If Loki Allowed Thor to Be King?

Loki was the first real “villain who was in the right, but went about it the wrong way” of the MCU. At least in the first act. One of the better parts of Thor was that, in the beginning, Thor was a big jerk and Loki was well aware of this. His initial plot was the save Asgard from having to deal with Thor in charge. Said plot gave Thor the character development needed to prove himself worthy while Loki ended up damning himself.

Loki probably could have done himself a better service if he just let it happen. When Thor runs Asgard into the ground, Loki will be there to take over and fix things. Or maybe Thor will just admit that he isn’t fit to lead and hand over the throne. Either way, the big laugh will come from someone telling Loki that if he knew Thor was going to be such a shitty king, why didn’t he do anything about it?

CAPTAIN AMERICA

What If Captain America Survived World War II?

Seems to be one of the easiest ideas. Hell, this was one of the very first issues of the What If comic and even gave us the first iteration of Bucky Barnes as Captain America. So we have Captain America defeat Red Skull in such a way that he doesn’t have to crash the plane and get frozen for a bunch of years at the end of the movie. Instead, Captain America fights through the rest of the war and we don’t have all that awkward finger-pointing that Steve gets for his Endgame epilogue.

read more: The 100 Best Marvel What If Moments

I’d like to see Cap be in the thick of Hydra’s inner-takeover of SHIELD, especially with Bucky still alive and looming in the shadows. Not only am I down for more team-ups between Steve Rogers and Howard Stark, but the idea of Cap being something of an uncle figure to Tony is too great to ignore.

THE AVENGERS

What If Loki Betrayed Thanos?

Recently, Marvel made it an official retcon that, during the events of the first Avengers movie Loki wasn’t 100% himself. Wielding the Mind Stone, he was really being manipulated by Thanos, which is their way of handwaving all the horrible stuff he did so we can more easily get behind him as a protagonist.

This reminds me of Marvel’s Earth X miniseries, which took place in a universe where all the god-type characters were really overly-evolved mutants from another planet who were endlessly powerful but were molded by the beliefs of others. In other words, all the Asgardians are scaling back their power and acting like Asgardians because when they came to Earth, that’s what humans believed them to be. Loki, being all about trickery and mischief, was the one who could see through it all and realized what he truly was.

I want that kind of energy in the Avengers storyline. I want Loki to figure out that he isn’t in full control of his actions. When Thor implores him to join him against the higher power, let Loki piece it together. The image of Loki working with the Avengers against Thanos is a cool one, but the real conflict is figuring out what to do from there. Whether or not he’s on their side, nobody’s going to trust Loki when the plan is presumably, “Let’s use these two Infinity Stones against a guy who has none.”

IRON MAN 3

What If Aldrich Killian Killed Himself?

Iron Man 3 begins with an origin for Aldrich Killian as the third most interesting character to call himself “The Mandarin.” He got to meet Tony Stark briefly at a New Years’ Eve party, Stark lied by offering to meet him on the roof later that night, and it was at midnight that Killian realized that Stark had essentially blown him off. He considered walking off the roof to his death, but was instead inspired to get his shit together and start up a big arms-dealing conspiracy.

Let’s take him out of the picture. There’s no Extremis plot, no drunk actors, no Vice President getting arrested, etc. This also means that Tony doesn’t get grounded. Part of the conclusion of Iron Man 3 is that Tony is able to grow up and move on in a sense.

People often criticize the MCU for ways it's walked back Tony's growth over the years, though. Tony’s attempt to move forward blows up in his face with Ultron, and thanks to his addictive personality, he can’t help but go back to his Iron Man ways and briefly kill his relationship with Pepper. Even in Endgame, he struggles with what kind of man he should be.

Perhaps the lack of Iron Man 3 would hinder his journey in the long run. He doesn’t blow up his armor or get his arc reactor removed. He keeps being as reckless and dedicated as he’s ever been. It costs him his relationships, but does the ends justify the means? How far can a driven Stark go, exactly?

THOR: THE DARK WORLD

What If Jane Foster Discovered Her Worthiness Earlier?

Granted, we don’t know the context of Jane Foster becoming the new Thor in Thor: Love and Thunder, but it’s going to happen in the upcoming movie, it’s happened in the comics, and it even happened in one of the first What If comic issues. Thor: The Dark World is one of the least exciting MCU entries and Natalie Portman peaced out due to how they handled her character, so let’s jump ahead to the Jane-Thor development.

read more: Thor: Love and Thunder - Jane Foster as Thor Explained

Jane’s already in Asgard for the underdeveloped Meet the Parents concept, so the setting is right. Maybe have her wield Mjolnir to save Frigga and see where it goes from there. I don’t know. It’s not like the villains are going to carry this story.

CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE WINTER SOLDIER

What If Nick Fury Died?

The threat from Winter Soldier is such a Gordian knot, and thanks in part to Nick Fury’s help, Hydra was defeated in a rather clean way. Take Fury out of the picture. There is no secret resurrection. He’s straight-up dead. Now there’s no finale based on releasing all the SHIELD files to the public and cutting off Hydra’s head.

Captain America and his buddies still defeat Hydra, but it’s messy. Hell, we might even get the Agents of SHIELD crew involved in this one because why not. Alexander Pierce may be killed or at least thwarted, but the story after the fact will be that Captain America is an enemy of the state, creating a variation of his Secret Avengers from Infinity War.

GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY

What If Ronan Destroyed Xandar?

What If was made for this one. Guardians of the Galaxy plays up Ronan’s disdain for Thanos and the possibility of them throwing down. Early on, Nebula warns Ronan that it’s a fight that he cannot win, but is totally on his side when he’s able to wield the Power Stone. It’s promised that once Xandar is wiped out, Ronan is going to go to war with Thanos.

read more: Marvel's What If? Animated Series Coming to Disney+

A full-on villain vs. villain war would be a damn fun episode. Obviously, like an arms race, each side is going to have to try to build themselves up with more Infinity Stones, presumably making it three-on-three by the time the two throw down. Don’t know how the Soul Stone would figure into this, but depending on how close Ronan and Nebula become...PROBABLY not good for Nebula!

AVENGERS: AGE OF ULTRON

What If Ultron Wasn’t Corrupted?

More specifically, the question is, “Could it have worked?” The creation of Ultron was Stark’s desperate attempt to protect Earth from a threat that he knew, deep in his heart, was going to come from the skies any day now. Ultron ended up blowing up in his face and caused the Avengers to splinter prior to Thanos’ run for the Stones. Had the plan worked out, Thanos would still need to invade Earth in order to get his hands on the Mind Stone and Time Stone.

As an aside: Thor doesn't know where the Time Stone is, so I figure he'll trust the Mind Stone to remain on Earth under Stark's care because he's already established that he doesn't want to keep two in Asgard.

While the previous entry is more about two villains clashing, this one is about a war between faceless soldiers. Endless dog creatures fighting endless Ultrons or empty Iron Man armors or whatever. Win or lose, this one has the potential to cause more worldwide damage than Thanos’ casual stroll through Wakanda.

ANT-MAN

What If Hank Pym Trusted Hope?

Hank Pym doesn’t choose Scott Lang to be his successor in Ant-Man. Maybe Scott’s still in prison. Or maybe Hope is his first choice after all. Either way, he builds Hope her own Wasp costume for the sake of stopping Darren Cross. She’s hindered by her inferior cat burglar skills but ends up being a bit colder and violent when it comes to ending Cross’ plans.

The real conflict comes in Civil War. Wasp is very much on Captain America’s side, but Tony Stark tries to get through to Hank Pym on the subject. Hank begins to waver, realizing that as much as he’s hated his technology being in the government’s hands, it still might be safer than what Cross had intended. This, in turn, causes Hope to resent her father all over again as the war between heroes commences.

CAPTAIN AMERICA: CIVIL WAR

What If Quicksilver Was Alive?

This is technically more of an Age of Ultron entry, but with a focus on Civil War. Quicksilver is able to save Hawkeye’s life without sacrificing his own. It’s hard figuring out a good switch for Civil War, but including Quicksilver in the mix might be the biggest offset. The shadow of Sokovia would still be looming, but at least he'd be there to help prevent his sister from becoming a black mark on superheroes.

Not only would he help turn the tide in the airport battle, but if Pietro were to be there for the final battle, he’d possibly be able to talk Iron Man down. I mean, Tony Stark is arguably equally or more responsible for the deaths of Pietro and Wanda’s parents than Bucky was for Tony’s parents, but Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch are able to move past that. Quicksilver can fix the Avengers before Zemo is able to splinter them.

DOCTOR STRANGE

What If Doctor Strange Used Time Travel to Save Himself?

Stephen Strange takes a look at Dormammu and decides, “Nope!” He’s going to use the Time Stone to prevent the universe from being taken over, but he goes about it in a more reckless way. He rewinds time to the point that he’s able to stop Kaecilius using magic save-states, which he figures takes Dormammu off the board. Deciding that the other magic folks can carry on without him, he then attempts to prevent himself from texting while driving.

Strange continues on with his earlier life, the mega-demon is no longer a threat, and life goes on. Or does it?

Strange was warned that overusing the Time Stone would cause massive repercussions, so things would undoubtedly go very wrong for the Sorcerer Supreme. Bonus points if this relates to Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness.

GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY VOL. 2

What If Ego Raised Peter Quill on Earth?

Ego was never going to be anything other than a monster. Charming or not, he killed a whole lot of his own children as part of his plot to kill just about everyone else in the name of finding his purpose. His redeeming quality was that he had some true love for Meredith Quill, but he didn't love her enough to keep himself from being an outright bastard. He was afraid that his love for her would keep him from achieving his goal, so he killed her in a rather cowardly way for someone so powerful.

I want to see a world where Ego saw things through and stayed with Meredith for good. What kind of person would he have become? I imagine he would have grown old, died of natural causes, and his body would have regenerated on his planet self, presumably with second thoughts on what to do with his powers. It's not too different from the Fantastic Four storyline where they turned Galactus human for a time and showed him the beauty of normal life.

But really, I'd like to see what kind of man Peter would become. I can't imagine he'd be drawn to the stars if his mother had lived longer and he wasn't kidnapped, but cosmic adventure is in his blood. Who's to say?

SPIDER-MAN: HOMECOMING

What If Spider-Man Joined the Vulture?

Getting so mad at Tony Stark that you turn into a supervillain is so easy that it seems to happen every other day in the MCU. Sometimes the bad guys even have a point! Hell, Captain America disagreed with him on whether or not to allow Iron Man to blow up Steve's best friend and that caused Cap to become an enemy of the state. It makes you realize that Rhodey's ability to put up with Tony's bullshit is the most amazing superpower of them all.

So in this What If? scenario, when Iron Man strips Spider-Man of his upgrades and gives him a time out in Spider-Man: Homecoming, Peter really loses it. When he's being driven to the homecoming dance, he tells his date's father about how much of a jackass egomaniac Tony is. In this moment of bitching, Toomes sees Peter as less of a threat and more of an opportunity in the form of a kindred spirit. The two end up working together and Vulture succeeds in stealing all that swank hero stuff from Stark's plane.

At first, it's just Peter turning a blind eye to criminal activity out of spite. Just like the OTHER time that happened, it doesn't work out too well for him. Iron Man is able to figure out that Spider-Man had some kind of involvement in the act and uses the Sokovia Accords as reasoning to bring the hammer down on him. Spider-Man escapes, but Vulture dies in the process. There goes another father figure.

Spider-Man decides to prove himself against Iron Man by taking all the stolen tech that Vulture had accumulated and finding worthy people to wield it in the name of starting up an underground, street-level vigilante group.

THOR: RAGNAROK

What If Nebula Killed Thanos?

In Guardians Vol. 2, Nebula is last seen leaving to go slaughter Thanos. We don’t see her until Infinity War, where it’s shown that she failed. Her failure is what helps Thanos realize that Gamora knows where the Soul Stone is and he goes on his rush to get all the Infinity Stones. Let’s just say that Nebula succeeds and kills her adopted father.

Now look to the mid-credits scene from Thor: Ragnarok. Before Thanos' ship arrived, Thor and Loki had an interesting discussion about whether or not Loki can peacefully coexist with Earth’s inhabitants due to the events of Avengers. This possibility would never be explored due to Infinity War suddenly happening.

read more: 20 Uplifting Marvel What If Stories

But without Thanos? We could actually see Thor as a king who isn’t bogged down by PTSD. We can see a Hulk that isn’t at odds with himself. More importantly, we can see how Loki deals with New Asgard. Especially since he happens to have a Tesseract in his possession.

BLACK PANTHER

What If Killmonger Remained King?

Invading Wakanda and succeeding is nigh impossible. You need to have the Infinity Stones or the Phoenix Force to make it happen or else you're going to end up like the Skrulls that one time -- a pile of bodies sent back to space with the message, "THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU INVADE WAKANDA," written in blood. This is one of those stories.

Killmonger is an angry hypocrite with no foresight. His plan to arm the underdogs of the world will do nothing but create chaos and untold casualties. It won't take long for Wakanda to become a major target. Rather than throw every superhero at the nation, Iron Man goes alone because he thinks his tech know-how could counter that of Wakanda's. While this is going on, Captain America chooses to go on a one-man mission to take down Killmonger after hearing that Bucky has been killed.

The good news is that Cap and Iron Man are able to work together and even work through their differences. The bad news is that neither survives. After such a failure, Nick Fury sends in as many heavy hitters as possible (deciding to hold off on calling in Captain Marvel), but the results are the same. Killmonger's regime stands tall, even though Wakanda is relatively worse for wear. He does find himself fascinated with the remains of Vision, especially the glowing gem on his head, and keeps his head as a trophy.

The dust has cleared and Killmonger finds himself the king of a global warzone. His victory is shortlived as Thanos and his Black Order arrive for the Stones. Before ending Killmonger's life, Thanos does give him credit for wiping out half of Earth's population before Thanos even had the chance.

AVENGERS: INFINITY WAR

What If Star-Lord Kept His Anger in Check?

One thing that annoys me is when people cite Peter Quill as the reason why Thanos was able to complete the Infinity Gauntlet. Yes, they were so close to pulling off the Gauntlet, and yes, Star-Lord losing control and punching Thanos in the face screwed that up. I get that.

Here’s the thing: Doctor Strange knew that it would happen and didn’t do anything to prevent it because apparently removing the Gauntlet would have still led to a loss. There was only one possible way things were going to work out and that was everything up to the end of Endgame. Star-Lord’s tantrum made little difference and, it’s possible to say, everyone might have been better off because of it.

What I want to know is why that would have been so bad? How would defeating Thanos in that moment have led to defeat? What kind of possible future did Doctor Strange see?

ANT-MAN AND THE WASP

What If Ant-Man Joined the Secret Avengers?

Rather than submit himself to house arrest, Scott Lang sacrifices seeing his daughter in order to hang out with Captain America, Black Widow, and Falcon for a few years. This leads to a major juggling act because he’s still going to get that weird vision from Janet, but things will be a million times easier to deal with because he doesn’t have to beat the clock with the Jimmy Woo business and he has his Avengers pals watching his back. Ghost is defeated, Janet is rescued, Hank is grumpy, and Hope has lost her respect for Scott for essentially abandoning Cassie.

Anyway, the most important thing here is that the Avengers no longer think Scott is under house arrest and are able to bring him to Wakanda and people can finally be excited to see that Thanos butt thing happen. Do it, Marvel. Do it, you cowards.

CAPTAIN MARVEL

What If Captain Marvel Killed Ronan?

Being a prequel that deals with the Kree, Captain Marvel features a couple of brief scenes that show Ronan the Accuser as one of the antagonists. As we know, decades later, he and Korath will become rogue soldiers out to exact revenge on the Xandarians. That means that in Captain Marvel, Ronan is protected by plot armor. What If features no such thing, so there’s nothing stopping Carol Danvers from simply blowing up Ronan’s ship instead of intimidating him to escape and fight another day.

As time goes on and Thanos needs villains to do his dirty work, he doesn’t have Ronan on hand. What he does have is the Mind Stone and what Captain Marvel has is a history of being susceptible to mind manipulation. Thanos ends up forcing Captain Marvel into being his enforcer and decides that he doesn’t even need Loki to begin with. Instead, Danvers razes Earth and tears through the Avengers. She also annihilates the Guardians of the Galaxy before they can even get started as a team while securing the Power Stone.

In the aftermath, a surviving Peter Quill is found in an intergalactic bar, drinking through his depression. A man appears before him, claiming to be his father, with the suggestion that maybe learning his true power for the sake of getting revenge on Captain Marvel (among...other things) is Peter’s purpose.

AVENGERS: ENDGAME

What Became of Thanos 2014’s Timeline?

As I already mentioned, Endgame is the only possible version of the movie’s events where the good guys win. Any and all tangents end with Thanos’ victory. So let’s move away from that.

Endgame’s time heist created two major alternate timelines. One is the alternate version of Avengers, where Loki escapes with the Tesseract and Hydra thinks Cap is on their side. We’ll be getting a whole Disney+ series on that reality.

The other is what’s left behind from the second Thanos. There’s a universe where Gamora, Thanos, and all of Thanos’ underlings and soldiers (minus Ronan) simply ceased to be. They all went to another timeline and never came back. Does that mean that Ego conquers reality? Does the Collector go forward with his plan to acquire all six Infinity Stones?

And what of Earth? This could go in different directions, considering a deleted concept from Endgame was that Thanos 2014 decided to tear apart his timeline’s Avengers before making the time jump. There’s a lot of potential in that episode.

SPIDER-MAN: FAR FROM HOME

What If Mysterio Was Iron Man’s Protégé?

So Quentin Beck created this world-changing hologram technology, watched his boss use it for the sake of personal therapy, make fun of it, and then call Beck out of line? Hey, Beck really shouldn’t have used the lives of a bunch of innocents to prop up his plan, but he had every right to be pissed at Tony Stark.

If television and movies have taught me anything, it’s that if you angrily insult your boss to his face, you have a 50/50 chance of either getting fired or getting a promotion. We saw the firing timeline, so let’s see what happens when Stark decides to actually listen to Beck. I imagine Beck would solidify his belief in the Sokovia Accords and take Spider-Man’s spot in Civil War. Just think about how anti-climactic that airport battle would be when Iron Man’s side ends up being a bunch of holograms and Bucky gets yoinked away in the confusion.

Beck could conceivably figure out Zemo’s plot through his tactics, but the question is how he would follow up on that. Does he step in Zemo’s way or does he agree and allow the Avengers to implode?

Gavin Jasper writes for Den of Geek and would love to see DC do an animated or live-action version of Elseworlds: Speeding Bullets. Read more of his articles here and follow him on Twitter @Gavin4L

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Aug 22, 2019

What If

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snkpolls · 6 years

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SnK Chapter 103 Poll Results

The chapter 103 poll closed with 2,013 responses. Thank you to everyone who participated!

Another month, another chapter that left people feeling excited! 98% of poll takers rated chapter 103 from good to excellent!

I just cant wait for the next chapter. I'm so HYPED

I like that Isayama for the first time since rts showcased a fast-paced action-packed chapter. Too many questions rn, but imo zeke is 100% w/ paradis, falco won’t die and the female titan will appear, regardless of its inheritor. Eren’s transformation was jizz-worthy

This chapter was both so thrilling and yet so frustrating. On one hand, so much is happening in just the right amount of panels and it seems Isayama has learned the art of pacing in this arc more successfully than others. I'm a sucker for tragedy, so the conflicted misery of what is going on is satisfying given the history of the series. On the other hand, I am still very frustrated in figuring out what exactly is going on, what is being implied, specifically anything involving Zeke

I don’t know what to say. I feel so empty. But the chapter is great!

This month it was a tie for most emotional moment between “Falco trying to encourage unconscious Reiner” and “Armin finally appearing, looking haunted”. We are happy to see that people who love both sides of the conflict were able to have a good emotional tug with this chapter!

Pretty much every panel that included Falco. This poor, traumatized child who ran into a literal war zone to get help.

Why are all my waifus getting killed.

With Reiner having no will to live, I guess he’s just going to stay in that crystal thing. Why do we have so many shifters in crystals now (Annie, Lady Tybur and now Reiner)?

I absolutely loved the scene between Falco and Reiner. That was one of the most emotional and sweet moments in SNK. Reiner was ready to sacrifice himself to save the child. I truly love how warm and protective he is towards children. I hope that both will survive. I want Reiner to find happiness and see how great person he really is. He made mistakes but regrets them. He learnt his lesson. Now is time to move on.

This one was a landslide win with Armin’s entrance taking the victory. It seems that months of waiting to see his return finally paid off! We’re sure many of you guys are hoping to see his Colossal form next month!

Eren transforming three times within a half an hour is incredible, but the most amazing part of the chapter was Armin's entrance as the colossal titan. The explosion looked catastrophic, can't wait to see it animated!

I literally screamed when I saw Armin, I’m so happy to see him with the Survey Corps, but his face worries me slightly. I’m also sad we didn’t get to see his titan form.

Not as epic as the last one but so glad to see Armin again. Sasha's sniping skills and Eren mindblowing everybody (Porco in particular) were the best parts.

While the majority of you guys are certain Zeke is only acting on his own agenda, there’s plenty of division on whether he could be siding with Eren alone or with Paradis as a whole. One thing that does seem certain to the majority is that he’s definitely not working in Marley’s favor.

Zeke probably thinks he and Eren are the same because they were both manipulated by Grisha or so he thinks. If he realizes that Eren probably doesn't hate their dad, Zeke's attitude towards his brother will possibly change.

Zeke's the one with most awareness that the cycle will repeat so long as shifters exist, his unique perspective is knowing what Grisha taught him as well as having the total trust of the Marley from a young age, and having physically gone and seen the island and witnessed their struggles with the titans, and met Eren who is the direct result of Grisha's continued plans. There is no one who should be more impartial and aware that this is a unending cycle, it seems he's finally coming to terms with having to do something about it after all his life simply being a pawn of people in what he assumed was a more influential position than him.

Every chapter I say "This is definitely the chapter we finally see what Zeke is up to" and every chapter it just gets more confusing...

I seriously doubt that Zeke is working with Paradis. One thing would be to act like an enemy but he literally killed a bunch of SC soldiers, I doubt the SC would be ok with that. Also, Levi looked PISSED AF! I doubt Zeke died and he's still suspicious but I'm betting on him having his own ulterior motives.

I don't think Zeke is working with the SC. It was hard to answer these questions when the options contradict my feelings and understanding of the chapter so much.

So. Good ol' Zeke. He's like David S. Pumpkins; he's his own thing. I'm still of the belief that he's working towards his own objective but now I'm more open to the idea that he may have something set up with SC via Eren as his point of contact (who, of course, is definitely working with/for SC). But it's clear that even if they are both aware of the chain of events unfolding before their eyes, both sides have something they want badly in the end and will probably "betray" each other without hesitation to get it at some point.

The survey corps has a plan but Zeke and Eren also have a separate plan they're not aware of. And on top of all of that Zeke has his own plan for his own personal agenda.

Zekerets

The general consensus is that there’s more in store for Zeke in this story, even if it means he managed to transfer his consciousness to his Eldian ass. ;) Most of you are positive we will be seeing more from Zeke in future chapters!

If Zeke is dead, I will watch the live action movie 10 times in a row

Levi cut Zeke out of the Beast Titan's neck while everyone was distracted by Armin's transformation. Then after Zeke made his getaway, Levi blew the shit out of the rest of the nape to destroy the evidence and make everyone think Zeke was dead.

Zeke escaped upwards using 3dmg right as levi was supposed to attack him, causing zeke to be assumed KIA

Well, looks like Zeke has been vaporised, playtime's over kids, let's head back home now!

I find it hard to believe that Zeke got taken down this easily again. I also find it odd that we don't see the clothing he's wearing inside his titan, but we do see what the others are wearing in their titans. Looking back, it seems that's the way it was before, too. But I think it would be a cool plot twist if he had 3DMG equipped this time, considering he did take Mike's 3DMG a while back.

While the majority believe that Levi is working along with Zeke, there is division on whether Levi has decided to let go of his promise to Erwin to kill Zeke. Over half of the voters believe that Levi still intends to kill Zeke when all is said and done, but a good 31% of you believe that he may have decided to let it go for the greater goal.

If the Zeke-Survey Corps alliance isn't real then Isayama must be the biggest troll ever. Also, I believe Levi has always shown that he'll do what's best for humanity/Eldia (even if it means doing unpleasant things) so I don't think the alliance is as far-fetched as other people believe.

Still waiting for that sweet Levi's Revenge™

Levi! I love how emotional Levi gets when it comes to keeping his promise to Erwin; nothing can get a rise out of him anymore or get him to max rage except Zeke. I hope we find out sooner rather than later what Zeke is up to, but there is no way that Levi is going to let him walk out of this alive, even if he is part of the current plan.

Regarding Levi wanting to Kill Zeke, while he'd prefer to kill him by his own hands we already know he'd be willing to feed him to someone so the Titan power isn't lost. I personally think Zeke agreed, since he has a a year left at best,

While there was a small shift in ratio, the majority of you guys still believe that Pieck is not totally trustful of Zeke. There have been plenty of analyses floating around believing that she may have seen Zeke leaving the Beast Titan after Levi’s attack.

The question about Pieck being mistrustful of Zeke isn't worded very well because if I answer yes it makes it seem like I'm part of the 70% and haven't changed my mind when I'm in fact part of the 30% and haven't changed my mind.

This question was mainly for fun, but Lady Tybur decidedly wins the award for Best “Bitch Please” Face™. Hopefully we get more fun looks from her next chapter!

Imma let you finish, but Lady Tybur has the best side eye in all of SnK

Ms. Tyber has the best death glare!

There’s some division on this question, but it’s a near-tie between Armin getting involved in the fight and the Paradis crew’s ticket out of Marley showing up.

They'll drop sour cream bombs

At this point John Cena might as well show up.

Annie will arrive (let me dream)

I think time is running for them to scape "safely", but not necessarily through a zeppelin

I think what Jean & Zeke mean by "It's almost time/times running out" is that Eren needs to make contact with Zeke before the Colossal Wall Titans arrive so Eren will be able to control them. If Eren doesn't touch Zeke before the Wall Titans arrive, everyone including the SC & Eldians will die.

I believe that the question about the lights up are relationed with Hanji, after all, Armin is too distance. In fact, I think that the thoughts about an escape through a zepplin are a little bit awkward. And I think that zeke escaped using the DMT, wich he took when he said goodbye to piecke and porko, before eren showed up.

Most of you still believe that Jean is clinging onto his humanity (and with good reason after he called Floch out in the previous chapter for being too zealous). The expectation is that he will avoid harming Falco or that someone else will step in and do the dirty work instead.

I noticed that jean is only attacking the shifters on shiganshina battle arc. which can tell a lot about his war ethics and strategics. he’s only fighting those who declared war on them first, almost as if trying to ignore those who got caught up into it.

Jean will kill Falco. I think becasue it's a callback for that girl from MP that Jean couldn't kill from Uprising

Last month nearly all of the scores were tied with both pessimism and optimism about Annie’s fate. This month, there seems to be more optimism, but most people are still hanging out in the area of uncertainty. We hope to get a clear answer soon!

Since Eren said that the crystal was, as expected, unbreakable AFTER pointing out it was like Annie's, I take that to mean he has tried chewing Annie's crystal open but failed like he did this time. I'm not sure why so many people seem to be taking this to mean that he was able to eat Annie when the scene actually reassures me that he hasn't

I had absolutely no hope for Annie being alive, but seeing Lady Tybur being conscious while inside the crystal changed my mind. Annie could still be alive. And if she is, she spent YEARS in the crystal while being aware of her surroundings??? I am shook

It has already been hinted several times that Annie would eventually return. I don't think Isayama would forget about her, and if it appears to be true, that she's returning next chapter, I hope to see her work with the Survey Corps, or a backstory/flashback, which explains the reason why she'll be working with the Survey Corps from now on.

Almost 35% of you are ready to just see Lady Tybur kick the bucket already, but a good 28% of you would at least like to see her have a chat with Eren first.

why do so many people want lady tybur to die?? i don’t understand?? she’s cool and has done nothing wrong to anyone like ever??? she’s even called a villain?? excuse me tell me one villainous thing she did?? she’s a decent human being but i guess how dare she beat eren’s ass up and defend her people... 🤦🏻‍♀️

Eren needs to swallow her whole (insert lemmy face)

Over 60% of you believe that the Survey Corps’ goal is to kill the enemy titan shifters.

I strongly disagree with having only 2 options in the "capture or to kill them?" question. The real answer, is, I believe, either one. If they can deprive Marley of a weapon and add it to their strength, is clearly the ideal. But, if the choice comes down to kill or they escape, they'll absolutely just kill them. Depriving your enemy of a weapon is always a better choice than letting them continue attacking you with it, in the hopes you could take it later.

I still maintain that the goal was to avoid any and all combat with the shifters; hence Pieck and Porcos trap. (Why bother setting the whole thing up? Why not just kill them?) My guess is that capturing them for their titan powers was the next step, although that's obviously failed. I feel like the end game here is to gather all the titan somehow and unite them for...??? Something??? World peace??? Shit, that sounds like a good idea. Unrealistic but good.

It’s a near-tie between believing that either Zeke orchestrated capturing Porco and Pieck or believe that he did it as a larger plan with the Survey Corps.

Maybe Zeke wanted to isolate Pieck and Porco in the trap, to save their lives?

Most of you seem to have given up on figuring out Trapdoor-kun’s identity. But a fair chunk of you think it could have been a current day Eldian restorationist! There’s still a good amount of you who believe it’s Connie as well.

Hiroyuki Sawano

Erwin it was erwin. You thought he was dead? You fool he's not! He's immortal, he's still here and with the strength of his eyebrows he will kick everyone's ass.

I really don't care at this point

One thing is certain, at least 65% of you guys believe that the Jaeger Brothers have the best Eldian asses! It seems nice booties run in the family!

I can forgive people supporting Marley, but WHO THE HELL VOTED ON ZEKE ASS?????

Everyone who chose zeke’s Titan as having the best ass is a furry goodbye

Levi is jealous of Zeke's Eldian ass.

porco got a nice ass uwu

That question.... I don't care about titan's butts -_-

I like Eldian asses

Predicting who Isayama kills off has always been difficult, but over half of you believe that Pieck is going to be toast in the next chapter, with Jean following in second, Porco a distant third.

Gabi you better not be aiming that rifle at my husbando Jean also can everyone of Paradis and Eldia have a party at the newly created bay, I want the warriors AND the SC to live please and thank you

Pieck and Porco will likely die next chapter 😪

I swear to god Flocke if you lay even one finger on little Falco or Gabi I will personally hunt you down, you'll be lucky if I find you first though. Because other wise the Armored titan will kill you dead. You will then, rest in pieces.

Protect Jean and Falco 2k18

pieck cant die, nor can any 104th members

At 57%, a majority are thirsty for answers on the Paradis Crew’s last 4 years.

I need Paradis flashbacks but first I'd like to be sure no one major dies, thanks.

I stg we'll have that fucking Paradis flashback right before Levi's death. Fucking Isayama.

I really don’t want a crap ton of flashbacks I’m Ngl I just kinda wanna get moving I know the q and a said stuff but like that’s my thought at the moment.

I really hope the next chapters a flashback to paradis i mean it would be neat for the 104th chapter to be a flashback ABOUT THE 104TH

As expected of the redditors, you’re still the overwhelming majority of the poll takers! ;)

ANY OTHER CHAPTER THOUGHTS YOU’D LIKE TO SHARE?

So chomping down on Lady Tybur's crystal won't break it and apparently neither will the thunder spears. We still haven't seen Eren try to use his hardening ability to break it but honestly, I think his only option now is to use the coordinate. It could be revealed soon that only the person inside the crystal can break themselves out and by using the coordinate, Eren can order her to do so. After all, we've seen Eren control mindless titans, but would unlocking the full powers of the founding titan allow him to control shifters as well?

Bertholdt's death was such a surprise to Porco... When Reiner returned to Marley, he gave his full report about what had happened, so if he was aware of Bertholdt's death, then he would have reported it, thus leading to Porco knowing that Bertholdt was already dead. Does that mean that Reiner has no idea that Bertholdt is dead? Was he hoping that Bertholdt managed to escape and was still alive on Paradis?

"Friendship ended with mr Kruger, now Reiner is my best friend." - Falco

Personally I'm not a huge fan of action heavy chapters like this as they take a few read throughs to get a good picture of what's going on. Although I do think the intention at the minute is to make us feel a bit lost as to motivations and who is supporting who. So I'm going to roll with it and be surprised when the reveals happen.

I think Porco will get Marcel's confession memory soon.

Even if it's all a plan made by Zeke and Scouts, the fact that SC soldiers still died , unaware of the bigger plan, makes me really sad. It's like with the plan to capture Annie back in the Giant Trees forest and Stohess. Back then it was Erwin who organized the plan, now it's Hanji's turn?

I. WANT. ANNIE. TO. RETURN.

I want Bert to Mufasa the fuck out of Reiner

Zeke is lucky he had royal blood as a bargaining chip to convince Paradis to team up. Otherwise he stood no chance if they had to fight for real. I don't think Zeke is a master planner, maybe he has an end goal, but he isn't a genius who has planned every step to get there. He gets lucky and bailed out by others and his conveniently relevant Senju DNA too often to be a keikaku master.

GIB COLOSSAL NO-LONGER-COCONUT

In before Jean's thrust into mortal danger via Gabi and Armin shows up to save his ass at the last second YET AGAIN

everyone simmer down like people in this fandom need to steal some of erens drinks from his apparently extensive alcohol stash like gdi I’m losing it guys I have a family and stuff I have alife and y’all losinf it and making me go crazy too like w t f.

Honestly, I was over the moon when Levi took down Zeke, but it did seem a little too easy...I highly doubt Zeke would go down easily. Also, Armin's haunted expression broke my heart. You can see the pain in his eyes, and that makes me even more curious about what's happened on Paradis over the last few years.

In my first read i thought that Armin had a ponytail and i got excited. Some users corrected me and when i re-read the chapter i found it was just his hand. I feel betrayal

Eren has more stamina than the Energiser Battery Rabbit: he can just keep on going, and going, and going...

I spent the entire chapter going "Get back in the damn titan, Porco!" I died with the panzer squad. RIP me."

Low key I have had no idea what’s been happening since 101

#snk polls #snk poll #snk spoilers #poll results #thanks everyone who participated!#long post

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minamiaurora · 6 years

Text

How blind I was

This is for @lifelovelaughangell123 ‘s “high school musical spn challenge”

I had the line 39 “he’s gonna figure out the right thing to do”

Pairing: Castiel x Reader

Words count: nearly 3600

Warnings: I don’t know... swearing and injuries, mention of dead people, nightmares, e.c.t. All the nice things found in the supernatural world.

And if it needs a warning: it's my first time writing and I had no beta reader so all the little faults are mine and if you find any, please just ignore them.

Disclaimer: nothing of Supernatural is mine and I don’t make any money with it. Just having fun with it

Since two and a half hours I drove now trough that big creepy forest that surrounds the small one-horse-town in which I had to be since yesterday evening, after getting a very low-quality phone call from my good old friend Sam Winchester asking me for "a little" favor. He and his brother Dean needed help on a hunt. I rarely understood the town's name where they currently stayed and after a few "What? what di.. ..ou s..y?" s when he tried to explain their case, I decided to just go and help out. I was only a few hours drive away and had no case myself at the time. Besides, it wasn't the first time I helped them. Honestly, sometimes it helps to have tits. The road through the forest was narrow but not in a too bad condition, but that didn't help at all to ease my trip. The mist in the early mornings made it nearly impossible to see anything further than the windscreen of the car. So I was more guessing than seeing where the street is. And the fact that I know what creatures can hide in the dark foggy forest didn't let me feel any safer. Yes, I am a hunter and guess what I still do not like to be in dark forests. especially at night. and when they're covered in fog. So when, with the rising sun, the town finally appears between the trees, I breathed in relief and speed up a little bit thanks to the now lifting fog. I check the name of the Motel Sam texted me and see to my surprise that I have a perfectly fine signal. As I pull in the parking lot I wonder for my self if all these run down motels did only survive because of all the hunters operating in the shadows of the community trying to save the world, risking and losing their life without the majority even knowing about them. Kinda like the M.I.B. I swing the door of the room open, who was like the exterior of the building built and decorated in the late 70s and never changed or renovated since because grand- grand mom liked it that way. A smell like old wet socks and towels which took a nice hot long soaking bath together in a pool filled with used condoms and cigarettes waved directly into my nose. "NOPE!" I harshly close the door again. //I definitely NOT gonna spend one second in that room// "you shouldn't. Not even Dean and Sam were taking that room. and they're not exactly picky when it comes to the choosing of a sleeping place." I turn around when I hear the low voice of the angel who stole my heart many moons ago.h Of course, no one on the team knows about that. I even managed to keep my thoughts away from him if he's around. And acted like a more or less grown-up person. It's after all only a little crush. And it's not like it grows for almost 2 and a half year. It happened slowly. I blamed it on the circumstances of our first meeting. He made his appearance into my life by actually save it from a nasty vamp. After a few nice night talks we had, (because like most in that business my time in dreamland is normally not pleasant. So I try to avoid it or knock me out.) I got scared by how deep in I was already. How much I could relax and open myself to someone. Even if I consider all of them family, not once have I ever spoken to Sam or Dean about the exact way my blood family died. Only with Castiel, I did. Ok, I was drunk as a lord after the last hunt with the infamous trio, but I told him under tears and hiccups how it happened. But for the first time in my life, I spoke about it and of what I can remember it felt really good. Next, I tried to blame his vessel. Why must it be such a good looking one? Special that /your favorite body of Castiel/ of it. His casual nearly submissive, kind being that changes in a split second into the warrior of the lord he is. The way he's sometimes just staring at one with that hypnotic blue eyes (the bluest blue on earth, heaven and hell I am sure of that). I get lost so deep in them happily every time I look at them. And his lips. when they move like they do now, how...// shiiit. He speaks to me. Fokus y/n Fokus!// ".. and she didn't hear a word you just said, Cas. Hy Kiddo" Dean walked around Castiel to greet me with a bearhug. "where were you now?" "..furniture? I.. I.." I tried to get my self together without getting the guilty as hell look. " I just wondered if all the Motels are getting their furniture from the same place. it seems to be all over the same. and it's always ugly." Now the sweet innocent eyes aaaand he smiles, ruffle my hair like he always does and walks past me direction his and Sams room. I turn back to Castiel to ask what he told me before Dean came by. His bewildered face lets me realize that I was not only rude towards him with not listening but I forgot for that second that he is able... "...to read your mind. Yes." My mouth open and close like a fish and my skin color is changing to 'i wanna die right here, right now' red. where are all these monsters who wanna always kill us now? Cas looks at me with his innocent tilted head and I guess his waiting for me to say or do something. "Igonnagetmeanotherroom" I rip the key out of the door, grab my bag and flee to the reception. //I better gonna get me another room in another motel. or even better on another continent. Yep. Or I go ask the guys for a shovel so I can go and dig my grave. If it starts like that I gonna end up shooting myself just to escape from an awkward situation // After I got me a new, and more or less clean, room I go to the guys to finally find out what we gonna hunt. Sam opens the door and pulls me in the room with the same kind of bearhug his brother did he then hold me on arm length. "What took you so long shorty? I nearly called the cops to search you" "I had a flat tire." while he and the reason why my eyes are glued to the floor are just raising an eyebrow, Dean shouts for the bathroom "and it took you 6 hours to fix it?" He walks in the room with his F.B.I. suite, take one Look at my turn to Sam with a devilish grin and hold his hand out." you owe me 20 bugs. She took at least two wrong turns." I stand between them finally looking up to protest. I really had a flat. but it took me like 20 min to change it. and I went only once right instead of left. but even with the wrong turn I took, I still could have made it bevor midnight. Why was I only here in the mornings? Forest. At Night. I sat in my fucking car and tried to get myself to press the petrol instead of the breaks I was pressing like I wanted to push my foot through the car at the beginning of my nemesis. If someone would have passed me there they would be for sure concerned seeing me in my car screaming at myself to stop my shit and get it the fuck together. I was turning my car and drove several miles back and tried it again. long story short, it was first after like two hours I was able to drive trough. I maybe need a new steering wheel but I made it. no need for them to know. after all, till now we only hunted urban together. I realize I spaced out again and were now staring at Cas. I really need to work on that. "How you keep yourself alive with what we do; I think not even God knows. But I see we have you back now. so how much experience do you have with wendigos?" Dean asks while he was putting on his blazer ready to go and play agent I think. Sam goes to sit at the table and opens his Laptop to show me what they had till now. "I had till now one. And avoid them since." My voice is trembling and my hands start to sweat. I showed the pictures that want to show up in my mind far to the back of it. "you think you can handle one, y/n?" the older Winchester brother asks with worrying in his tone seeing me getting paler and paler. "Yes... Yes of course. I mean what could probably go wrong when I`m together with you guys?" Apparently... A lot. Not only are Sam, Dean and I hanging around (literally) in a Wendigos cave since midnight; now I had to give them the whole story of my family getting wiped out by a wendigo when I was a teenager. Because even if I grow up in a hunter family, the fear paralyzed me the moment I heard the screaming of the creature. And since I should have been the boys back up and failed completely at it it is my fault we are gonna end up as the savings for harder days of a Wendigo and I owe them more than an explanation why I couldn't do my fucking job. " and that's why avoid forests. and wendigos. And that's as well the reason why I was only yesterday morning at you guys." I hang my head in shame. It's quiet. Except for the dripping of water from the walls and the blood of the other two victims of which the wendigo already had taken a bite or two. why are they not saying anything? Are they unconscious? "You know y/n, that was a real dick move. If we would have known that before we would never have ask you for help in that case. Everyone is afraid of something. that is only human, man. But to keep such important pieces of information to yourself is a fucking stupid way to end your life and the ones of the people around you. And if we hadn't Cas to get our asses out I would really kick yours. Ok, I still gonna kick it. To teach you a lesson. " Dean finally answers weakly. "And the drinks after we're out are gonna be on you."Sam goes on. "Sounds fair to me." And like he was waiting for his signal Castiel make his appearance in the cave. He is, all of a sudden, standing in front of me. Looking concerned over Dean and Sam to check their condition. While the Guys had some severe injuries (nothing he couldn't fix luckily) from fighting back the Wendigo, I only had a small head wound on my left temple from getting knock out, head first, against a tree. When he "scanned" the Winchester the look in his eyes turned quickly relaxed. Like he is used to seeing them in such a condition. What he probably is. Then his attention turns to me. As soon as he sees the thin blood trail that emerges from my temple all the way down till my knee, remember that whole warrior of the lord thing I was speaking before? Well, that was his gentle look, compared to the expression that I see now. It is there only for a fraction of a split-second but boy oh boy I am sure as hell glad he's on my side. His pupils are nearly non- existing. the normally warm summer day sky blue iris turns in an ice blue that is able to freeze alcohol. then there is guilt. But before somebody can do or say anything he spins around and cut the Wendigo that had sneaked on us in four parts. Like that wasn't enough he kicked the one part of it through the cave. When he's aiming for another body piece Dean brings him back. "Cas! Buddy, he's done! So what about you get us three down here and we fuck off?" and like a light switch the usual Castiel was back. Momentary at least. He cuts our ropes that hang us from the cave top and heals us. Then with a last, for me, not readable look at me, his gone again. The drive back to the motel is filled with, at least for me, uncomfortable silence in the morning sun until Sam turns in his seat. "Ok. whats going on between Cas and you?" "Nothing! Really. I mean I have no idea what you talking about." Shit. It is easier to fool Dean than Sam. "You guys know him longer than me. You tell me whats going on with Castiel." and even if I try my best I can't stop my voice from completely betraying me by getting higher with every damn word. Deans loud laugh let both, Sam and me, turn our heads towards him to raise an eyebrow when he states that everything finally makes sense. Luckily we're just back at our accommodation. I rush out of the Impala and with a quick "see ya in an hour" I storm to my room and loke the door. "So you say that both of them have a crush on each other but y/n don't know how Cas is feeling?" Sam smiles from his seat back in their Motel room, because for him all your strange behavior when the angel was around now made total sense. Then he frowns "And what are we gonna do about that? I mean obviously, none of them will make a move because shorty is as oblivious as can be, and with Cas being an angel is not gonna make it any easier for them." "yeah 'know what you mean man. But I gonna speak with Cas and I think he's gonna figure out the right thing to do for them and their position. And if not we gonna kick them in the right direction. so easy." Sam raises an eyebrow at Deans "easy" idea. he gets up from the uncomfortable seat to take a shower before they all go for breakfast. He hears Dean "pray" for the angel before he opens the shower. when he comes out Cas is nowhere, but Deans grin tells him all he needs to know. this is gonna be very interesting. "WORST hunt ever!" I scream in my pillow after I let myself fall on the bed. I turn to lay on my back and just stare at that ugly ceiling. My had is empty. But not for long. Soon pictures of how the Winchesters were dragged into the cave flicker in mind. They could have been dead. Because of me. Because of my stupid pride. because of my stupid lies. //, Of course, can I handle a Wendigo Dean. It's not like I still wake up every night screaming and trying to run from the dead empty eyes of my little sister and brother I was supposed to guard that night.// I sit up and wipe the tears away that had made their way over my dirty face. I get up again from the bed to take a nice long hot shower. It is always relaxing for me and it helps to clear the dark clouds in my mind. I mean Den said, when we were at the car, that we're fine and in the end, the goal to kill the wendigo was achieved. Even if it was trough Cas Angelblade and not with the explosion they had in plan. " so actually you even saved us a whole lot of TNT" he joked while loading the boxes with TNT in the boot of his Baby. And just like that for him and his younger brother that conversation was done and over. So let me wash myself and think of something nice. Guess what is the first nice thing my brain presents me, yes Castiel. But not the normal happy Castiel, no, I see his face just before he disappeared into the cave. Was he sad or angry? Or confused? No, I know these expressions of him. And it didn't really feel as if he had negative feelings towards me. More as if he'd like to say something important. and couldn't bring himself to do it. Since the water is starting to get cold, I step out of the shower a little bit relaxed but at the same time quite confused. I open the shower door and nearly slip on the wet bathroom floor. I grab the handle of the door and save my had from another injury, but twist my arm behind my back. "ooww fuck!" I quickly leave the handle and fall on the shoulder I just forced into an unnatural position and that fast. Forgotten are the Wendigo, Castiel, and the world. Pain is all I know right now. I hear my shoulder who glides back in position as I turn my body to lay on the other shoulder in a fetus position. Stars in front of my eyes. I silently scream out. I swear. and the tears are falling again. Slowly the Pain fades a little bit. I sit slowly up straight against the bathroom door realizing that my towel is still in place. more or less. I know I could simply pray to my crush and puff everything is right again. A knock on the door stops my thoughts. "y/n/n. are you ready for breakfast? I'm starving!" Dean tries to open the door while he speaks. "Y/n? Are you fine?" he's asking now worried because I didn't answer right away. "All fine Dean. Nearly at lest. I just twisted my shoulder a bit. give me a minute." "Are you sure? should I not maybe call..." "NO! No Dean I'm sure." "hehe. Whatever. we're waiting at the car. Hurry or we may let you behind!" Do I really have to tell you that 10 minutes I am still struggling with putting a shirt on? "You are such a stubborn Human y/n" with only my head through the shirt I spin around to grab my gun on the bedstand at the sound of somebody in my room, but stop when I realize it's "only" the last person I wanted to see right now. "Castiel! How many times do I have to tell you not to sneak up on me like that! Owowow" His with amused sparkling eyes turn worried when he hears my painful hisses. he is at my side in a blink of an eye. "please let me heal you y/n/n." I am surprised by him using my nickname. I mean by him using any Nickname. But the throbbing pain of my shoulder let me quickly forget about that. I nod and close my eyes. I wait to feel his finger on my head but instead both his big warm hands carefully cup my face, tilting it a little upwards and is forehead is leaning against mine. When the pain faints, I shyly open my eyes. I can not only feel the warmth of his hands and his forehead, it's like I get hugged by his whole being. The warm sensation flows through my body. The glowing blue of his eyes the only thing I see. I feel love. the love he is feeling for me. The unconditional pure love that promises never to betray. It's nearly overwhelming, but for the first time in a long lonely life, I feel completely safe. It's only the two of us. No sounds. no surroundings. I slowly take his hand in mine to free my face and bring a little tiny bit of space between our faces to take in all his features. From his full plumb lips that now curl into a smile to the ocean of love that needs me when I look in his eyes. and I love everything I see exactly like it is now in front of me. Before I knew what happens he unwinds our hands and pulls me with his one arm around my waist closer to him again. The other is in my hair on my backhead and I give in to the kiss the moment his lips are on mine. there are no words needed. we both but all the love, the desire for each other and the need of closeness in that first kiss // I was so blind// we separate after all the air is out of our lungs. "Yes. I already thought that I was misunderstanding your behavior." //you reading my mind again// he gives me a not so innocent smile " yes and so by the way I can hear your thoughts about me even if I am not around"

#High school musical spn challenge #castiel #castiel x reader #castiel fanfiction #Castiel x y/n #Castiel x you #cas x you #cas x y/n #cas x reader #supernatural #supernatural fanfiction #supernatural fandom #challenge #first time writing #wendigo

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lubbuthedigitalnomad · 3 years

Text

The Treasures At Our Fingertips

Hi! I hope you are happy and healthy. What’s new where you are? Life in the big city of Kathmandu rolls on. This place has many wonderful qualities. Air quality is not among them. Smoking cigarettes here is redundant. Within a month or so, I will be moving to where there are more trees, more quiet, a lake, and less pollution.

I’ll miss the many wonderful people that I have met here in Kathmandu.

The following are two very, very short pieces. Some folks tell me that both are a little abstract. Considering that the whole world seems to be painted in a bizarre shade of paisley these days, I don’t suppose that a bit of abstract will hurt anything. The two pieces are in the spirit of a couple of guys that taught many people what the phrase “walk your talk” means. The first is about overcoming obstacles that prevent us from being who we want to be. It comes from the book, Reincarnation Through Common Sense and was inspired by Archan Den. He was the head monk of the forest temple in Kok Ta Hom,Thailand that took in a very troubled man from Brooklyn, New York and allowed him an unconditional half year of living among saints. Archan never asked me to, nor did I while there, study Buddhism. The one job he gave me was “Make your self comfortable.” That half year turned me back into a human. The second section is from the book Fearless Puppy on American Road. It was mostly inspired by Kunsang Dechen Lingpa Rinpoche. He is the Tibetan Lama and mystic that I have seen more often than any other. He has been dead for a decade or so. I still see him sometimes. I have met many other very wonderful Lamas before and since, but Kunsang Dechen Lingpa Rinpoche was just the right one for me to meet at just the right time.

In spite of the fact that both pieces were written by a nearly 70 year old juvenile delinquent, I hope you will enjoy them. Thanks very much for reading, and for the backlink clicks.

Please be happy, Tenzin

“All talking will become sheer nonsense, if one cannot elucidate the Truth.” Milarepa

p.s. If you find the reading at all enjoyable, please — it literally takes only seconds — click one or more or all of the highlighted backlinks following this paragraph. This simple process is completely without risk, cost, or difficulty. All it does is bring you to the site that is highlighted. Each click is a big help in pushing Fearless Puppy up in the Google rankings. Whether you browse the sites or close the windows immediately, your help has been delivered when you click. Thank you!

FEARLESS PUPPY WEBSITE BLOG

FEARLESS PUPPY ON AMERICAN ROAD/AMAZON PAGE

REINCARNATION THROUGH COMMON SENSE/AMAZON PAGE

FEARLESS WEBSITE

Would You Rather Be a Finger or Part of a Hand?

Waiting for God or Congress to fix things won’t work. The Collective Human Attitude cannot change until the attitudes of the individuals composing it do. This has been proven many times.

Great Masters have come and gone. We immortalize their words and images. But the actual purpose of their teachings was to inspire us toward functional applications of those words in real life situations. Unfortunately, much of humanity seems to mislay those functional applications as consistently as a teardrop in the rain.

Why?

It may be true that some people are just too damn lazy to change their minds. The bigger problem is that many of us are too stressed out, distracted, and preoccupied to concentrate on the process of making this a truly better life for our selves, and a better world for everyone. Inhumane stress levels numb us into surviving under comfortably fossilized lies instead of living with truths that might be disturbing in the very short run, but will save us in the long run.

The inhumane stress levels that modern people suffer are largely fueled by two pieces of drastic misinformation. Nearly all of us have been brutally misled regarding the qualities defining our most critical human directions — the purpose of life and the meaning of success.

A more functional definition and a consistent practice of these terms are necessary in order for us to maintain peace and decency on an individual level. Only after plenty of that has been accomplished can peace and decency arrive, survive, and thrive at the community, national, and planetary levels.

The bigger masterpiece can only be painted by combining the brush strokes of all our little self-portraits.

All the great teachers, religions, and spiritual traditions seem to be nearly unanimous in their on-paper notions of the terms “purpose of life” and “success.” Their notions — unlike the general public’s questionable and constantly wavering standards for doing Earthly business — usually nail it.

The purpose of life is to not only achieve health, love, and happiness but also to assist whatever else is alive to do the same. Personal success is defined as developing the individual decency and courage to promote that universal well being, and building the skillful means to turn that brilliant motivation into actions that are realistically helpful to self and others.

Great ideas! Of course, the big problem is the “on-paper” part. Installing these notions from the on-paper version into actual practice seems to be a rare happening among humans.

No One can save humanity now. Salvation has been circling the planet for a long time. It has no place to land! We can provide that landing pad by personally moving toward what we are asking for, by actually becoming dynamic peace and cooperation, and by leaving a lot of old bullshit behind.

It can be difficult for a person to independently redirect his or her focus. Millennia of outdated conditioning and our present-day hypnosis by modern media only scratch the surface of what needs to be overcome. But we have to start somewhere.

The best place to start may be to simply make ourselves comfortable with our selves.

It is a sad fact that the pressures of life in our modern world make being uncomfortable in one’s own skin a very taken-for-granted condition — a condition that often seems like it is an insurmountable obstacle to so many people.

There are very few insurmountable obstacles in life. What may seem like insurmountable obstacles at first are more often just challenges. We can victoriously rise above almost any challenge by just making a consistent, stable, relaxed, focused, determined effort to do so. This is true whether that challenge comes from the darkest corners of the world — or the darkest corners of our own minds.

“There are no problems. Only solutions.” John Lennon

The Ties That Bind/The Treasure That Heals

Iam not a qualified teacher of anything except English as a Second Language — and am not very good at that. I have always been a haphazard and rebellious student. In high school, I threw pencils at the backs of teachers and attended more drug parties than classes. I’m not going to try to tell you things that I have no spiritual or intellectual authority to tell you — except for this one thing. Here’s the reason.

Years after high school, I fell in love with a teacher. Not in the romantic sense, of course. He might more likely and more accurately say that I fell in love with what was coming through him. As a result, I might have paid attention to what he was saying in a different way than most folks pay attention in class. I may have picked up some of his unspoken thoughts well enough to fashion words around them. (There might also be some residual LSD notions of my own that have survived from long gone decades and are mixed in here.) So here goes.

We are all connected. There is a singular fabric of life that contains everything that is living. This bigger picture is more real than our little individual ones. We are each a part of one big unit as surely as, and more profoundly than, we exist as independent individual humans.

Choose any of the well-known cloth metaphors: cut from the same cloth, threads running between us, woven into the fabric of… They all have truth to them.

There’s a thread that ties you to your mother. There’s a lesser one that ties you to the grocery clerk. You and I have a strand that connects us. There are other threads — and they may be a lot less visible but believe me, there are other threads — that tie you to every other living creature on Earth. You have never met most of these people or other living creatures in the flesh. You never will get to meet most of them. There is still a connection so true that your wireless provider would kill to figure out its technology.

There is also a connection between every person (including you!), and some powerful esoteric energies. We may not be aware of these connections and energies. They exist nonetheless.

One of my stronger threads ties me to an energy represented by a mythical bird that can rebuild its life from the ashes of its own destruction. This energy teaches how to transmute poisonous experiences into success and benefit. Relative to this, there seems to also be a thread running between my self and some very wise people who can translate, even to a relatively dense human being like me, exactly what that mystical bird symbolizes. These wise folk can make a complex concept more easily understandable.

Millions of people everywhere are consciously enjoying these types of connections. Folks of every conceivable nationality, occupation, and spiritual tradition receive transmissions of energy and information from who or whatever their teachers may be.

These teachers offer this information openly. They send it out like the sun sends out its warmth and light — but have no control over whether folks choose to receive that warmth and light or shiver in the shadows. The quality of attention paid by the student is at least as important as who the teacher is.

Teachings may come through exemplars such as Jesus and Buddha, or through a pony’s ass or an alfalfa sprout. The lesson to be learned is within the student. Anything or anyone is potentially a catalyst, a vehicle, that opens up a deep mental circuit for us.

The frames of reference, language, and nuance that all these catalysts are carried on can vary greatly according to the needs of the individual student. They consider the unique receptive abilities and disabilities, the habituations of cultural programming, and the reflective tendencies of the student. The presentations may all be different, but the root nature of the non-verbal information and energy being transmitted are the same.

The common denominator among the people I know to have received these sorts of transmissions seems to be a simple but active motivation. If you have a deep inclination to transmute harm into help and be of benefit to others — whether they live next door, on the other side of the world, or in the Twilight Zone — you will eventually be connected with the sources of energy and information that will assist your effort. If your motivation is less altruistic, you may be in for a bumpier ride. Contact with these sources seems to be a matter of continuously asking for it through action as much as word, then persevering (maintaining direction, strength of conviction, and determination) until assistance arrives.

Another thing seems apparent. Teachers aren’t only teachers. They were, and usually continue to be, students themselves. In Lincoln, Vermont, I saw evidence of a very strong thread running between a modern-era Lama/mystic and a legendary teacher of a thousand years ago. Almost everyone with any knowledge of Tibetan Buddhism is familiar with the famous teacher of a thousand years ago. The modern-era teacher is nowhere near as well known.

My text book research of this modern teacher says that Lama Kunsang Dechen Lingpa Rinpoche is considered to be a “treasure revealer.” I have to disagree with my own research. All personal experience tells me that the man, himself, is a treasure.

p.s. There may also be a connection running between what we commonly know as time-and-space, and a pathway to detour them — but that’s another story.

About the Author

Doug “Ten” Rose may be the biggest smartass as well as one of the most entertaining survivors of the hitchhiking adventurers that used to cover America’s highways. He is the author of the books Fearless Puppy on American Road and Reincarnation Through Common Sense, has survived heroin addiction and death, and is a graduate of over a hundred thousand miles of travel without ever driving a car, owning a phone, or having a bank account.

Ten Rose and his work are a vibrant part of the present and future as well as an essential remnant of a vanishing breed.

Follow him on Facebook, Doug Ten Rose

Travel Adventure Books can be an excellent gift to your friends and family, buy from Amazon.com

#traveladventurebooks #keepreading #kindlebooks

Many thanks to our wonderful friends at Pema Boutique Hotel for their help and support.

The books Fearless Puppy On American Road and Reincarnation Through Common Sense by this same author are also available through Amazon or the Fearless Puppy website, where there are sample chapters from those books. Entertaining TV/radio interviews with and newspaper articles about the author are also available there. There is no charge for anything but the complete books! All author profits from book sales will be donated to help sponsor an increase in the number of wisdom professionals on Earth, beginning with but certainly not limited to Buddhist monks and nuns.

If you missed the Introduction to the new book that will be titled Temple Dog Soldier, or would like to see several chapters of it that are available for free online, go to the Puppy website Blog section. This is a book in progress. You will be reading it as it is being created! Just like you, I don’t know what the next chapter is going to be about until it is written. As the Intro will tell you, this is a totally true story — and probably the only book ever written by and about a corpse journeying completely around the world!

#adventure books #travel adventure books #travel adventure book #fearless puppy on american road #reading #amazon kindle #kindle books #amazon.com #buy books online #Reincarnation Through Common Sense #buddhism book #buddhism books #buy

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aosquakerider · 7 years

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Prompt: Daisy and Robbie training together (without powers) after he comes back and much to his surprise (and delight) she kicks his ass (because come on her SO was THE CAVALRY)

A/N: THIS IS THE BEST CHAPTER. IT IS A REQUEST FROM ME TO ME. MY OTHER ACCOUNT IS lairofailiasfox . ok no jk but for real this is my favourite of the 7. I just feel like I wrote it all for myself BECAUSE IT’S JUST. SO. SO… *GESTURES TO ALL OF IT* THIS. THANKS FOR THIS REQUEST!!

CH. 7 of 8

Next chapter >>

Time passed since the date. It was not a large passing, but it felt surreal as Daisy constantly questioned, did it really happen? What made her think that agreeing to Robbie’s date was a good idea? She knew that Robbie forgave her for embarrassing him, even without agreeing to the date, so why did she agree? There was easily a chance that it was because of Mack’s simple, heartfelt words ‘I can wait for a little bit longer for you to let yourself be happy.’ So she tested the waters, and fearing the waves, she backed out immediately.

She couldn’t do it. She would not allow her heart to take that step again. She had to face her future alone, with only the aid of her comrades at SHIELD. Her life was a mess, no one should ever have to share such a burden with her.

The Team had bothered her about the date for days after. She would always answer their prodding questions with merely smiles and silence. To them, her silence made it seem like she didn’t wish to speak about it, like things had gone sour, but her face told them that she recalled the evening with such fondness. Both of these expressions and actions left them terribly confused.

It would be Mack to be the first to ask the most obvious question.

“Are you two dating or…?” He sunk down next to her in a seat while she was on lunch.

“No.” She answered bluntly before burying her muzzle in a large hamburger.

“Alright.” Mack looked understanding as he nodded and looked off to nowhere. “Good to see you letting loose at least.”

“Mmmhmm.” Daisy responded with a mouthful of burger.

Mack could see she was busy, obviously, but still he wanted her to know. “We all just want you to be happy. That’s all.”

“Mmmmhmm.” Daisy understood, and she definitely would have shared far more words if the words could escape her burger bun, ground meat, and lettuce filled face.

“As long as you allow yourself that much, then that’s good enough for me.” He nodded. “I’ll leave you alone now, I got my own lunch to grab.” He lifted himself off his seat. “Been working through too many lunches, don’t wanna start loosing my six pack.”

Daisy blocked her mouth, cutting off her chuckle which would have sent food shooting down her esophagus if not for her last-minute save.

After finishing her lunch, she passed through the hall to return to her workstation, were she had left her laptop to download a large portion of information. As she walked, she found her mind beginning to wander. Her thoughts hovered around through sweet memories as words hummed in her head ‘We all just want you to be happy. That’s all.’ Everyone was looking out for her, they all wanted to push her towards Robbie, when she expected them to pull her away. He was a devil-possessed man, and yet they all thought he carried the ability to bring her happiness. What gave them that idea? For some reason, though, her heart did not disagree as the memories her mind fluttered over were of his smile, his comfort as he sat with her, and everything that encompassed being Robbie.

How? How could this be? In a children’s tale, of every man she could have ever chosen to share her heart with knowingly, the worst of the worst would be a man who shared his body with a devil. Yet here he was on her mind, this dark-souled man that made her feel light. A man who’s face could occasionally smile with such joy, would also occasionally light on fire. Why? Why was her heart actually feeling this way? She certainly did not deserve to feel this way, and yet, here she was.

Any time he has ever been there for her, concerned for her, taken care of her wounds, allowed her near him and shared information with her that he had never revealed to anyone else, not even his own brother, it made her realize just how comfortable he could be around her. A pool of warmth filled up inside of her chest, bringing her comfort of her own. On top of it all, her small date with him was simply wonderful. She sighed while sitting there in the chair in front of her laptop, barely noticing it was even there as it continued it’s exciting download toward the end of the bar. Her sigh wasn’t romantic, rather, it was disbelief. What had become of her? What had become of Daisy Johnson, Agent of SHIELD, leader of the Secret Warriors?

A quick shake of her head forced her dreamy thoughts aside so she could continue focusing on her task: watching the download bar. It was at 70%.

What if… What if all she wanted was to spend time with him? Her thoughts were quick with their return. Was that so bad? Maybe it would be different, then. If all she did was spend quality moments with him, and not make such a fuss about it, then she could still have her happiness, without risking his? She mulled over it for quite a few moments, until at last her download completed. Afterwards, she continued to mull over it.

Then it was so.

That evening, Daisy and Robbie were together in the perfect place, spending time with each other that Daisy herself had requested. She simply… wanted to see him, as she stated to Robbie. Robbie never questioned it, and only agreed.

Her heart raced, her mind went in all directions, here they both were alone again with each other, about to share something they both enjoyed: punching one another. It was a one-on-one duel of good fun in the empty boxing gym late at night. Little lessons would be added in that Daisy would provide for her eager opponent. They each were dressed in black tank tops and loose pants, with bare feet and bare fists. They intended to fight, to train, to boost their skills with a good engaging romp in the gym.

It was true, Daisy’s idea of a perfect evening with him was to punch him a bunch. It was simple, it was easy, it would get one’s mind off of whatever problems they faced, it was even fun when it wasn’t to the death. So why then was she so nervous and sweaty? She was grateful that Robbie never seemed to notice she had already begun to perspire. Her heart thudded against her ribs as she gazed at him standing across from her on the mat, fists at the ready, eyes locked with hers as hers locked with his. Her soul felt alive.

Hold on, did he still feel the same way about her? She told her brain to shut up, because he was about to fake deck her in the face. Before he asked her out, though, he was entering rooms where she happened to be. He would glance at her awkwardly, as though he was about to ask something of her, but he would restrain before casually leaving, sharing not a single word with her. She hadn’t noticed it before, or maybe, she was choosing not to notice it. His body language, the way he behaved around her, the smiles he’d flash her. She paid no attention to the signs, not until that night, when they sat across from each other at the dinner table.

It was all starting to make sense.

In a flash, the memories of every compassionate gaze he ever gave her flooded into her mind, and with it, came his words ’… I have always liked having you somewhere nearby… ya know?’ Her heart began to melt to the thought of him, flaring up her passion and desire to be strong for him, causing her pupils to dilate. She sought to prove that strength by using it against him. This idea made perfect sense.

There were suddenly no more thoughts. She was pulled from her mental world with Robbie launching forth, flinging a tight fist fiercely at her. Her reflexes were instant and her moves were quick and well trained as she nabbed his arm, spun, and threw him off balance behind her. He stumbled a bit before turning and throwing another strike which she blocked with her right, then another which she blocked with her left, then threw a kick into his stomach that sent him back. Too slow. It was too bad for him that he had no S.O., or more specifically, no Agent May of his own.

“You’re good.” Robbie rolled his shoulder, readying himself again with a slight lean forth. “Especially when powers are off the table.” He smirked.

“Pffft you’re just jealous that I’m kicking your ass.” She retorted, but as she did, Robbie bolted at her so quick she almost had no time to react. She blocked his arm with both of hers, as he grabbed her and sent her to the ground. He held her down with one arm, gripping both her wrists in his one hand.

“What was that you were saying?” Suddenly, a pair of legs wrapped around his neck and shoulders, and twisted him down to slam into the ground. She flung herself atop him, pinning down his hands with her knees, she sat square on his hips, and leaned her body over him to press her arms into his collar bone, holding him flat on the ground.

She leaned an extra inch to whisper hotly into his ear. “I said I’m kicking your ass.”

He simply laid there with no response, wide eyes unblinking, frozen. He didn’t even make an attempt to escape, not a single jerk or hint of struggle, even though he could easily escape her with his strength. It was as though he wanted to be there.

“I hope you’re not upset about losing.” She gave him a playful, mischievous smile.

He appeared to enjoy where he was at as he took a moment to respond. “No, not at all.” He seemed simply captivated as he gazed at her.

“So, then, you like getting your ass kicked. I see.” Daisy stated with amusement. It was then that it hit her. She realized that with his face left in a bedazzled gaze, it suddenly looked so beautiful. She had never realized how gorgeous he was, when he didn’t have murder on his mind. It wasn’t simply because he was physically attractive, it was also owing to the feelings that his eyes channeled to hers with his expression alone. It was a wonderful sensation, warm, and not just because she was sitting on him.

An idea planted into her mind, then. With his attention fixated on her, lost in her as she was lost in him, and her unending need for an answer (as she told herself, it was an answer she desired, nothing more), she believed it was time to obtain that answer she sought. “Robbie, can I ask you something?” She spoke with placidness.

“Do you want me to answer while I’m like this?” He accidentally flashed a tiny smile which would go unseen if she had blinked.

Her face reacted with a quick smirk of her own. “Definitely.”

“Alright… go ahead.”

Her expression became an earnest one, then. “Why do you like having me near you? … and… why did you ask me out? Was it because people told you to or because you wanted to?”

Robbie blinked. There was a long, drawn out silence. “… do you really need me to answer while I’m laying here like this?”

“Okay. Alright. I get it.” She shook her head with amusement while moving off of him. She stood, then reached out a hand to help him up after. Normally, he wouldn’t take anyone’s hand, but this time, he reached for her, only to freeze and pull back a second after. He helped himself up instead. Daisy could tell what he was up to. He respected the space she had asked for at the end of their date, despite the heavily suggestive implications she had made just a moment ago. What a dumbass. Albeit a caring dumbass.

“I just…” He turned to her after standing, and sighed. He shifted his stance restlessly. “I just wanted to because, I don’t know.” He looked away for a moment and lowered his arm to his side, thinking while shaking his head, then looked back to her. “You’re Daisy.” He allowed himself to lock his gaze with hers. In those eyes, there was a clear passion, one that Daisy longed to get a clearer glimpse of, to feel for herself. “Everything that comes with being you, I guess I just… I just want to be a part of that.” He locked eyes with her, and lifted his arm to rub his opposite shoulder briefly.

That was enough for her. The decision her heart made happened so fast, for once her mind was not allowed any say in it. Robbie was caught unawares as Daisy nabbed his tank top and crumpled it in her tight fists. She followed quickly by yanking him down to her and crushing her lips against his. She indulged with him in a full, passionate kiss, forcing him backward as she pressed against him until they collided with the wall at his back. She held him there with her entire body, her hands brushing over his chest. Their eyes had fallen shut to bask in each other. He gave in completely to her passion.

Daisy didn’t take a single second of it for granted as she devoured his shockingly soft lips, and felt the pleasurable senses of his tastes and feeling and warmth. Fervour brewed in her gut as she felt him return the kiss as powerfully as she gave it, his fingers running hungrily through her hair, holding her closer to him than she had already pressed herself, with them both pressed into the wall, grasping at each other and brushing over each other needily.

Sensual lips brushed over one another, as they longed for more, but Daisy bereaved them both of it, by slowly pulling away, leaving hot trails of breath on Robbie’s face, and feeling his dance on her own.

There it was. There was a visible smile that had just formed on Robbie’s face. Her eyes were filled with the view of it. She could not get enough of it, she could not get enough of his happiness.

Lost in the deep euphoria of their passionate moment, Robbie let his eyes glide over her deceitfully delicate looking form, realizing how truly beautiful she was. He wanted this. He wanted this moment they shared to continue forever. If that could not be, then he wanted it to happen again. He wanted it every day for the rest of forever. He was greedy for it. He needed to tell her. So his own heart acted before his mind could stop him. He would speak them. Those sacred words that only true lovers share. Those that choose only to commit their entire selves to the ones that they love. He parted his lips, and allowed his breath to escape “Daisy.” He paused to draw in a measured breath.“… ah… I -” A single finger was placed over his mouth.

“Shhh.” Daisy softly hushed him, tragically cutting off the sweet words she would likely never learn he longed to speak this perfect moment. She quietly demanded that only silence be shared now as they soak in the moment. She pulled her finger down his lips, feeling them with the tip of it, and replaced it with her own soft lips, continuing their kiss. Robbie certainly did not object, her words, her breath, her kiss, her engulfing presence so soft yet blazing to his every sense.

#lairofailiasfox #Quakerider #fics #my fics #fanfiction #marvel #agents of shield #I love this fic a lot #sorry if i drown the tag again i just am too lazy to do the cutty to ao3 thing right now #I HOPE YOU LIKES

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stipulatedconflict · 7 years

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Individual interview with Ryan Sabatis(Red Red Red/Mellified man)

It has been more than a decade since I discovered this band RED RED RED which is one of my favorite bands that gave me a deep influence to my own music. It was the Myspace era(sounds so old fashion haha) and I was seeking new bands and sound through it back in 2006 or 2007. Then I came across this band somehow. Its sound was very unique to my ear. Fast and aggressive as hardcore punk, and its rhythm bounded bit weirdly but still had the groove of rocknroll but which was not the boogie woogie way. It was sharp, edgy, solid and tight. I was digging teengenerate, new bomb turks or devil dogs etc that kind of 90s-00s garage punk/ass shaken’ rocknroll punk a lot at that moment(I still love though). But Red Red Red sounded completely different compared to any of these bands. The groove of Rock’n’Roll, RED RED RED had a different vibe. It’s kinda different perspective and interpretation of Rock’n’Roll. This time I was thinking why I don't interview the guys who gave me some influence. Then I could get in touch with Ryan Sabatis who is the heart of RED RED RED.

Check their sounds here:

youtube

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gI-b8F0aodQ

youtube

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kSXMxXQfpjI

Interview starts from below:

-How have you gotten into music in the first point?Please tell me the story how you started being interested in listening to music(it doesnt mean punk/garage/rocknroll)

I was pretty into listening to music when I was very young. I was taken to a lot of these car show events with my family. It was nothing but 1950’s music, rock and roll, doo-wop, etc. Growing up there was a lot of that and classic rock stuff, more 60’s-70’s staple stuff. I was young in the 80’s so the hard rock/metal style was also happening during that period.

I started playing guitar when I was 14. I took lessons for several years from an instructor in my hometown and learned a lot about playing music and theory. The music I was listening to and learning to play once I started playing an instrument was a lot of more mainstream rock and metal types of music. Music study wasn’t just that though, I was taught and played some classical and jazz also. I liked it but those things clicked for me more so later on and I became more interested in listening and playing other genres.

-Then how have you reached punk/garage music?Please tell me the story that you started listening to punk/garage/rocknroll music.

It started with friends in school. I had friends that listened to metal bands and the punk influences that went along with them. Like the typical ones you would know Metallica, Megadeth, Slayer, Suicidal Tendencies. Those bands would throw out punk bands as influences, like the Misfits, Black Flag, Minor Threat, etc.

In the 90’s there was a lot of popular music that was sort of derivative/influenced by punk stuff. Call it grunge, metal, alternative rock, whatever. I liked the more popular stuff but once I started moving backwards to the older bands I liked those a lot better.

There are 2 albums I bought early on that stand out and flipped a switch in my mind. One was the Stooges Raw Power. Another one was Damaged by Black Flag. Raw Power is a super strange record to hear for the first time. It just SOUNDED different in all ways. Super weird and deranged, recorded/mixed weird. Both of those albums are bizarre sounding and very powerful.

My friend Jason and I had a mutual interest in music. He used to read these music encyclopedia books and would always tell me about cool bands to listen to. Primarily hardcore/punk then started getting into 60’s “garage” and more rock and roll style punk bands. He definitely had a good ear for things. Jason and I started playing in bands together also for years where he was the drummer. Later on Jason was who I started RedRedRed with, he was the bassist. 

-Please tell me your favorite bands 

That is something that evolves and changes for me. I can list some of the favorites that are probably more relevant as influences to my music:

The Stooges, MC5, Hendrix, The Sonics, Chuck Berry, Bo Diddley, Link Wray, Captain Beefheart

Hardcore punk stuff like Black Flag, Bad Brains, Minor Threat, Void, Scream, Articles of Faith (tons of other ones)

jazz stuff, John Coltrane, Miles Davis, Sun-Ra, Ornette Coleman (tons of other ones)

A lot of various ones also through the years also, the Scientists, Brainiac, weirder stuff Silver Apples, Half Japanese, Trumans Water. I was a big fan of the label Crypt which put out bands like The Pagans, Gaunt, New bomb turks, Billy Childish, Teengenerate, Devil Dogs, Oblivians/Compulsive Gamblers, Country Teasers, Lyres, etc,

-Please tell me the band/musicians that especially gave you the influence/inspiration for your play style.and why.

The ones I listed above are big influences. Some of the playing style elements that crop up would be various things – like from hardcore punk with playing fast, aggressive, and tight. Or from other influences with playing free/loose, noisey. All things pulled from some of the bands mentioned above. As far as why, I lean towards what I like to hear and play, as well as what the music may call for. 

-You can play drum and guitar.Is there any difference of joy when you play?

I enjoy playing both instruments. I have gotten into learning more regarding drums in the past few years so I play those regularly. The main difference is when I pick up the guitar I will likely write a song or immediately start flowing some sort of idea. A good idea on guitar can affect me in a different way for sure.

-Which instrument does represent yourself well as an artist?

My writing is primarily connected to the guitar and I have been playing that the longest so I would say that.

-Could you tell me the bands you have played in before?

I played in my first band with my friend Jason drumming for years. The sound was punk/hardcore, kind of rock and roll more so towards the end. We sounded like when you hold play and fast forward on a tape recorder at the same time, probably too fast. We did not release any recordings but practiced a ton, and played shows. 

I also played drums in a band with some friends (Kent, Tracy, Kevin) for 2 years when I was in college in Kalamazoo, MI. This was in the mid-late 90’s. That was a hugely important learning experience. The playing we did was primarily improvisational in playing and writing. Getting on a wavelength with people and letting the ideas flow. The guys I played with were a few years older than me and introduced me to a lot of different music. 2 of the guys more avant garde stuff, and the other guy introduced me to a lot of more obscure punk/noise bands. When you end up meeting a record guru person that was it for me – 3 of them at once.

Later I re-located to east Michigan, around Ann Arbor/Ypsilanti which is near Detroit. I answered an ad and joined the band the Piranhas as the drummer. That is another story, but that was another hugely important period and band to me. We played together for 5 years, made records, and toured. After the Piranhas I was in another band drumming called Druid Perfume. At the same time I started RedRedRed.

For lesser periods of time I’ve played drums in the bands Mhz, His Name Is Alive, Human Eye, and other short lived ones.

-When you started playing in a band(the first),why did you want to start a band?what was the reason?

Something to do, to be creative and have an outlet. I really had a passion for it from the start and have always retained an interest in listening and playing. I am grateful that I was able to have some good friends to be involved with music with.

-How was the local scene when you started playing and be involved? 

Depending on the period that is night and day. Where I grew up and playing in my early bands was pretty different than when I moved near Detroit area. With our early band we were from a small town so we would have to travel a little to see shows or play. I remember there were a lot of bands around and shows to go to which was cool. Even in our hometown some of the younger kids started bands and are still active with it. I have pretty good memories about that period of time.

Around the year 2000 I moved to Detroit and started playing in the Piranhas. That was a weird experience because I was not as familiar with the Detroit scene prior and the music scene there exploded during that time, it was right at the peak of all that.  

-How did RED RED RED start?

 I was drumming in the Piranhas and that was going well. But I was primarily a guitarist and I wrote. I never really stopped that and was looking to do something again.

I met the drummer Jon through his cousin who was a co-worker of mine. I had actually seen Jon’s old band - Easy Action - before I knew him. My old band-mate Jason had moved to the area and he joined as a bass player. So we started the band then with that lineup.

-How did you decide the name RED RED RED?is there any specific meaning?

I was listening to a song where it sounded like the singer was saying that but he was saying something else. So it came from auditory hallucinating. There is no specific meaning I just thought it was a good name to use and no band existed before with that band name.

-Was there any specific idea of sound for RED RED RED before it started?

When I first started playing with Jon we were a 2 piece and it was very different sounding. I made up this custom tuning for my guitar and created these chord fingerings that worked and so that I could fret and get these really dissonant intervals/tones. We did that for a while then scrapped that idea and said we are going to play rock and roll. Then we brought Jason in on bass and started the group.

The sound was mainly an aggressive rock style but it had to have a different angle, be original, no re-hashing things. I wanted the songs to be solid and throw wrenches in the structures. Some of writing that stuff came to me out of body, free-flowing, it’s hard to explain how I wrote some of those things thinking back on it.

-Could you describe the sound of RED RED RED by your own words? 

Michigan rock and roll…..

-How was the music scene in Michigan when RED RED RED was active about a decade ago?

I think what the younger people were doing had started to transition into some different things when RED RED RED started. There were still great bands doing garage rock and roll but some more different sounds coming out also. Some of the bands I remember that we played with or were around at the time in Detroit were Human Eye, The Frustrations, Terrible Twos, Easy Action, many others. It was still pretty thriving and a good scene to be able to play in. Detroit has a lot of great people that know and appreciate music, there is a big music history in that city.

-Were there any bands you RED RED RED had sympathises with for the sound or attitude?

Loosely… punk stuff as I mentioned, Black flag, mc5, stooges. Our drummer, Jon, played prior to that in Easy Action with the singer from Laughing Hyenas. Jon’s drumming has a lot of influence from those bands and his playing style brings that as well. I think we were original and varying enough though and had our own sound.

-Why did RED RED RED stop playing?

We might have stopped for the time, but to me the band is just on hiatus. Aside from that, years ago the 2 guys that started it with me (Jason, John) were not able to do it anymore because of being too busy, normal life/family stuff.

When you wrote me you mentioned the first LP – Mind Destroyer. REDREDRED was re-formed after that with a 2nd version of the band that played live and released the second LP called “New Action” also on Big Neck Records.

I am really proud of the second LP. We were doing pretty well and played some really good shows, some of the best I have ever played. The guys in the v2 of the band were: Johnny on lead guitar, Matt on drums, and his brother Mark on bass. We stopped playing mainly because we lived far away from each other and the logistics were not working at the time.

-How about current bands?What band are you in now?

Redredred is on “hiatus”. I play in a band in Ypsilanti, MI where I live called Mellified Man.

-Could you tell us about your current active band mellified man?How does it start and how is its sound?

Mellified Man is a group that started a few years ago with two friends who are on the same wavelength as me. I primarily drum in the group but we switch instruments also. The music starts primarily from improvisation and it is more experimental leaning. We have an album recorded that we are planning to release. There are some demo versions here https://mellifiedman.bandcamp.com.

-How is the punk/garage/rocknroll scene in Michigan now? Is there any difference when RED RED RED was active back in 2006?

I think the older more known bands kind of went away and it’s more newer bands or people coming into it. Some of the older ones are still going and new blood, new ideas is a good thing with the younger bands.

-Are there any good bands in Michigan which we should keep our eye on?

Mellified Man, Minus 9, Diamond Hens, The Hemingers, Easy Action, Timmy’s Organism, Wolf Eyes, His Name Is Alive

-Have you played outside of US? 

No but I would like to.

-Please tell me the most impressive live show of your entire musical life as musician.and why it became your most impressive show?

I don’t have a #1 but some that I can look back on that were good were the Piranhas west coast tour shows because we were a honed in group for a long time at that point and dialed in.

Also the 2nd to last show RedRedRed played I think we were on fire, I dug that a lot.

-What’s the craziest experience by playing in a band?

Also I am not sure what is the craziest but I can think of some ridiculous ones:

Trying to cue a song change while the singer blows up a bomb on himself.

Singer cutting his butt and face up

Stay in the hospital leave, go straight to show and play

Band member punched out bar owner, band chased out thinking we’re going to get killed

Someone pooping in a cup and putting it in someone’s cup holder in an unlocked car then saying “I always wanted to do that”.

Etc. etc.

Most of this stuff was pretty shitty but I can look back and laugh at some of it at least.

-What’s the weirdest experience by playing in a band?

For anymore weird experiences I would primarily credit to my friend Jimbo Easter. I played in bands for years with him and he is pretty weird sometimes but I love him!

There was one weird visual that stands out also from playing in a band. I played drums for my friend Warn’s band “His Name Is Alive” years ago. We were opening for the band – Psychic TV in NYC at a big venue. Prior to us playing there was a female performance artist that was on the bill. I just remember that I was one minute not really paying attention, then I looked at the stage and it was completely ridiculous. The woman was on this huge stage completely naked with a little tophat and face taped above her pubic hair, which was curled into a bit mustache. She was gesturing herself around with her finger like a little hairy person was singing between her legs with this ridiculous music blasting. I looked over and Warn and the singer of Psychic TV were sitting together on the side of the stage while this was going on and they looked like super happy like nothing out of the ordinary was occurring. Maybe you had to be there but it was exceptionally weird.

-What is the biggest joy for playing music?

Being able to be creative/expressive, writing songs & playing with friends, recording. It's the most rewarding playing live for people, when someone connects to it and gets something from the music as well.

-What kind of music you are listening to except punk/garage/rocknroll music?

Some stuff I mentioned before. I have been working on drumming a lot the past few years, so more drum oriented stuff, jazz, samba, polyrhythmic, prog stuff.

-Do you have any specific way to compose songs and lyrics?

It depends, for lyrics I need to have some inspiration, some feeling to get out, something to say in it. Sometimes it may be abstract. For composing I channel it from somewhere out of myself. I just start playing. I’m not sure how to convey that technique… I record a lot of ideas and edit things together. For playing with people improvisations are one of the best approaches to create.

-For the lyrics,do you have any specific theme you want to express?

Nothing specific and I write about different things. Things I can relate to and feel. Some of it is personal expression to myself and left for people to interpret their own way.

-What is your daily job?

The job I currently do to take care of things is computer programming. I do music because I love it and I play/practice all the time.

-Is there any hobby/interests except Music/band? 

My primary interest is spending time with my family, my kids.

-What does band/playing music mean for you?

It has been a big part of me for a long time, it’s my outlet to be expressive and creative. If someone else connects with it or gets something out of it also that is the highest compliment.

#Interview(EN)

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