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#he deserves to be locked in a closet
sweetpaintedladie · 4 months
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listening to the hackney diamonds live “album” [those like 7 songs that they recorded live] and it’s honestly so jarring how much better the new material is without the horrific production, like truly just astounded the production of the album was so horrible that a group of 80 year old men just fucking around on stage sounds so much better ? you’d think it’d be the other way around but alas andrew watt seems to be in a competition with himself to see how horrendous he can make an album sound via production
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unproduciblesmackdown · 6 months
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The Billions Showrunners Go To See Bway Bmc like lgw "the problem has always been me" and they look at each other approvingly and nod like now he's getting it :) and then the squip's deactivated and everyone's embracing the realities of being a person and rejecting the idea there can be, should be, and is a set of standards to meet to get everything you want and preclude yourself from being mistreated and they're like nooo what a powerful tragedy :(
#then the nyt critic listens in on their conversation like Jot That Down Jot That Down ''jeremy deserved to stay In Crisis & bullied''#it'll be a lingering irritation with billions just like w/any other work that is supposed to earnestly engage w/anything But Then#is ultimately / reverts to being about Vibes instead when it was in fact not meant to be a work ultimately about vibes#like good news i in turn earnestly engaged with your work. that's why it's on sight#winston billions#bmc#was gonna say obviously don't know if anyone from billions went to bmc but No....daniel k isaac confirmedly did lol iconique#can't fathom the thoughts the showrunners would really have lmao#just like i have to assume their thoughts abt will as jared was the typical/superficial ''wow guy we find bothersome rude & undeserving!''#maybe it wasn't maybe it wasn't....but they did only give him a would've been one time bit part whose job was to be so rude & undeserving#like jk save for tossing in an inadvertent? misgendering of taylor for good measure quant kid 2 was wholly in the right#having him be an object to be crumpled up & thrown into the trash was Their intended bookend. but really it's that wags should die#and that winnie n tay was everything. the way quant kid 2 wasn't meant to be a character in 3x03#winston was barely handled as a preexisting character in 7x03 besides the [object to be crushed] & [computers?] angles#Except the flickers of specific interaction w/taylor; totaling like 3s overall fr; were what was most like ''yeah he's someone specific''#anyway again ''you were purporting to make something about anything but ran over that w/your Vibes Based approach in the end'' annoyance#couldn't lose in s4....yearning to be able to film winston more; which would've been him being [winston: __ everyone: get his ass]#but b/c he wasn't very available winston is presumed locked in a supply closet somewhere not invited to meetings or gatherings. works too#k&l surprised at ppl not picking up on an intended Literal Death Exception to think not Everything the main epic winner does is epic win#like well yeah sure but your show was then in fact about how all that really matters in the end was being in the superior Winner class#whereupon it's then not about your actions & their consequences so much as it's about your feelings & intentions#and it's not so much about That (relevant specifics expire 6 eps later or by the end of the season) as it is abt being that Winner#then thinking losers Could get organic aba (abuse forcing compliance) like well yeah of course!#the classic excuse about a hypothetical Conversion into winnerdom/correctness to uno reverse blame/responsibility#anyways like i said it's on sight; a testiment to that attentive & earnest enough engagement w/your work out here lmao#everything Else abt billions making it more & more incredible they had Taylor in the midst of it all#but by in fact going ''this character is supposed to Contrast w/usual 'winner' traits'' you Do disrupt that Vibes Based approach#and ofc can't consider some kind of ''oh nooo they've become fr thee Typical winner'' b/c failed step one they stay nonbinary#casting winston just as serendipitously more than billions deserved or could handle#will roland acting it tf up right away even w/quant kid 2 in a way the writing would never step up to lmfao. beautiful
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dorindameddler · 2 years
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I do think Margaret and joe are soulmates and that they would never cheat on each other
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sirompp · 7 months
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that old man is driving me insane
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toruslvt · 2 months
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 SEVEN MINUTES IN HEAVEN.
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⋆ suguru geto, choso kamo, satoru gojo + fem!reader.
 ⋆ mdni. college au kinda. fingering, cunilingus, dry humping, choso + shy reader, making out, ‘just the tip’ satoru cums in your panties, dirty talk. usage of sweetheart, baby, babe, princess, angel.
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ִֶָ SUGURU
Suguru’s not shy in the slightest, often smacked in the back of his head from the dirty looks he gives your cute ass under the tight little skirt you wore to the party. a couple of drinks in and he’s thanking the world for the chance to be locked in a cramped closet with the pretty girl who caught his eye.
“fuck, sweetheart, you’re dripping” he murmurs against your cunt, two fingers knuckle deep and his tongue continuously flicking over your clit. the closet’s carpeted floor burns in your back where your shirt rise, up your neck for his fingers to occasionally pinch a nipple in between keeping your thigh spread for him to feast on your spasming pussy. Suguru would lie if he said he didn’t dream about this moment, grateful for the opportunity even though he would have found a way to bend you over the bathroom sink.
his eyes are hooded, cock pulsing and dribbling precum all over the front of his boxers solely from the satisfaction of having you gush all over his tongue and digits. “you’re always this wet? or just excited because it’s me?” he teases, breath direct against the flutter of your cunt seconds before his tongue is gliding between your puffy lips, alternating between licking and slurping on your clit until your thighs shake.
“feels good” you sniffle, eyes crossed and chest heaving from the intensity, from the agonizingly slow drag of Suguru’s fingers inside your walls.
“’m glad, baby” he smirks, face fully buried in your cunt, his once slow and steady rhythm now sloppy and eager, forcing the wet sounds of your pussy to resonate through the room as he eats you like it’s the best fucking meal he has ever tasted. your time is running low, and Suguru will make sure you walk out of the closet with wobbly legs.
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ִֶָ CHOSO
although forced by Yuuji, Choso is not quite mad he ended up in the current situation.
he thinks you look so pretty, so fucking pretty in that outfit, allowing his eyes to trail down the shape of your body much like he often does while you walk past him in class. “you look good” he finally manages to croak out after a whole minute of sitting side by side in the closet your friends pushed you into.
“thank you,” you murmur with your fingers twiddling shyly, and Choso feels his cock throb, “i’m glad you decided to come.”
“yeah?” his voice drops, pulled closer to your side like a magnet, eager to hear more, “why is that?” driven by a sudden burst of self confidence, Choso slides a hand to your thigh, briefly brushing the fabric of your pants.
“y-you seem like a nice person” you stutter in return, chest thumping and pussy wetting at the touch, at the low raspy and breathy tone in his voice, “wanted to know you better”
‘cute’ the black haired thinks, tentatively allowing his warm lips to brush your jaw as you stutter, eyes unconsciously landing on your cleavage, fuck..., how he wished to rip your shirt open in the spot, cup your pretty tits in his hands and make you cum from his tongue on your nipples.
"feelings’ mutual, babe” Choso groans, unable to stop his hand from reaching your cheek and tugging your face gently towards his, the touch of your lips on his is almost immediate, sloppy and messy with tongues clashing, saliva wetting the bottom of your lip that drops and stains your flowy shirt.
you’re too good to him, he thinks, and you deserve better than a quick fuck in a closet, so much against his inner lewd thoughts about savagely tasting your pussy, he tugs you up, lips still attached as your ass land on his clothed cock, begging to be freed and release inside or all over you.
but this will do for now, he just wants to make you feel good, he needs you to feel how much he craves for you; Choso might think he’s going slow, but the broken cries and whimpers increasing in intensity with each drag back and forth of his hands on your hips prove otherwise, grinding you nice and directly against his pulsing member. addicted to your moans, to your sounds, Choso can’t wait to become addicted to your cunt too.
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ִֶָ SATORU
“lean back against the door, princess... mm, yeah, that’s perfect” Satoru grins, tongue poking on the side of his cheek at the perfect sight of your pliant body, cutely leaning back for his eyes to take in the sight of your pussy swallowing his cock head, panties pushed aside enough for the fat size of him to comfortably get enveloped by your walls. ‘just the tip’, he promised, mentally kicking himself for the teasing he brought on himself.
he needs to fuck you nice and deep, to bury the whole girth of his cock inside your warm inviting pussy,— but he won’t, Satoru promised to keep it light, just the tip... for now, and it’s hard to resist when you look at him with that slight glazed over gaze, lips glossy, puffy from the intense make out session you had just a couple of minutes ago, spread for huffs of air to come out.
but of course, when Satoru wants something, he’ll do his best in trying to get it.
“it’d be so easy, to pull your hips down and slide my whole cock inside...” Satoru tuts, sliding his thumb across your belly until it lands on your folds, rubbing on your engorged, glistening clit, “wouldn’t you like that baby? to take me whole inside this tight cunt of yours?”
“you promised” you whine in return, slowly circling your hips on his cock, dribbling slick all over his length until it coated his balls and most likely the floor underneath.
“tsk” the blue eyed retorts, continuing his assault on your clit while occasionally bucking his hips up, just slightly, but how can you blame him when you feel just too good, too warm and slick, almost begging to be pounded, “’kay, but at least i’ll make you cum on my cock” he groans, using the hand that isn’t on your clit to rub at the same pace on your nipples, bringing them to full hardness under his ministrations, “your body is so responsive, angel, so fuckin’ sexy” it comes with a buck of his hips, making a dragged cry to come out of your lips, thighs shaking from the effort of maintaining yourself in a hovered position, “you gonna cum? I can feel you twitching” the constant previous teasing got you to the edge in a matter of minutes, arching your back in a beautiful way that makes Satoru groan appreciatively, “fuck, yeah, so hot”
the cry of protest comes almost unconsciously at the same time he pulls his tip out of your still convulsing cunt, fixing your panties before sliding his cock through a leg opening, eagerly rubbing on your mound and sensitive clit until the crotch of your underwear got translucent by the amounts of mixed fluids, soon joining the thick ropes of sticky cum that land on your flushed skin, a reminder of the too short moment of passion you shared.
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houseofceline · 6 months
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My Pretty Girl - T.N.
Pretty Bow Cardigan
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Pairing: Ravenclaw and sort of ditzy but talented Reader x Slytherin notorious playboy Theodore Nott
Warnings: None (yet ;))
Summary: Theo hates listening to rants but he could listen to you talk about your sweater for hours.
< 4
__________________
You nibbled on your bottom lip as you looked around the classroom. 
You were one of the first to finish your exams which is very unusual, resulting in an uneasy feeling in your stomach. You felt like you had done all the problems wrong. 
The test felt really easy in the worst way possible. 
You watched as Theo stood up from his stool to hand in his paper. 
He was better than you in potions and the fact that you had finished before him made you want to vomit up your breakfast. 
As he walked back to his desk you locked eyes with him. 
He took his hands and did a thumbs up and down, as a question to you. 
You tilted your thumbs up till it was in the middle. 
So,so. 
He smiled and even though there was nothing to smile about considering you probably just failed another test, you smiled back anyways because his smile was just that contagious. 
There was nothing you could do now but hope. 
—-------------------
“THEO THEO!” You ran after him after catching sight of him in the hallways. 
Theo looked around confused, tense even, but instantly relaxed as he saw you running towards him with a paper in hand. 
His smile matched the big bright one on your face and he held his arms out. 
You ran into his chest and in the heat of the moment he picked you up and spun you around. 
“Bro wh-” Lorenzo was cut off by Mattheo who covered the boy’s mouth before dragging him away, letting the two have their moment. 
“Look Theo, look!” You exclaimed as you held up your test paper, waving it in his face. 
A big E marked on the top right corner, the best test grade you’ve ever received in that class. 
“Congratulations bella,” he praised and reciprocated your smile as he took the paper from your hands before holding it out like he was examining it. 
You blushed at his compliment now getting shy. All you wanted to do now was go back into his arms and hide in his chest so he wouldn’t catch you getting all worked up over a simple praise. 
“This deserves a special reward,” Theo stated as he handed you back your paper and patted your head. 
He pushed one of your hair strands out of your face and looked down at you. 
“There’s a hot chocolate shop in Hogsmeade, if you’re up for it this weekend,” Theo placed his hands in the pockets of his robe, feeling a little nervous for your answer.
You nodded eagerly. You loved chocolate. The rich and creamy taste and the way it just melts in your mouth. Not only was it good in candy form, but literally in everything else. Well besides cake. Chocolate cake is one of the worst things ever. 
It was simply too much chocolate and it tastes so dry and makes you want to throw up. 
However vanilla cake with chocolate icing, that you would die for. 
“Alright I’ll come get you Saturday morning at ten,” Theo chuckled trying to bring you back to him as he watched you get lost in thought. 
“See you soon bella.” 
You grinned happily to yourself as he walked away. 
Saturday. That was tomorrow! 
What were you even going to wear? There’s not enough time, there is nothing in your closet. 
You had to calm down. It wasn’t even a date, you reminded yourself.
Getting all worked up over a simple hang out was silly. 
You took a deep breath and tried to calm your nerves.
Too bad it’s not working. 
You’re hanging out with a super attractive guy all by yourself. 
You were scared and nervous, never hung out with a guy alone before. 
At least you were getting hot chocolate out of this. 
Hmm you wonder if they have whipped cream. You didn’t like any marshmallows in your hot chocolate because you drank it so fast the marshmallows wouldn’t even melt all the way therefore it was too sweet when you ate the half melted marshmallow at the end.
All you needed was whipped cream and a candy cane. 
—-------------------
“Y/n you’re going to be fine. You look amazing,” Cho assured, sitting on her bed as you tried on multiple pieces of clothing. 
You had 10 more minutes until Theo’s arrival and technically you were ready 30 minutes ago but suddenly you decided that you didn’t look nice anymore. 
“I don’t think I knitted this correctly,” you frowned, examining your cardigan. 
A miniature mistake. You would have to really, really pay attention to detail to recognize it, but since you were already critiquing everything miniature about yourself, it was a huge mistake. 
“Theo is not going to notice it babe I promise, and plus you made the whole thing yourself! In my eyes that’s really impressive,” Cho claimed as she walked out of the dorm to check if Theo was here yet. 
You eyed yourself in the mirror one last time. 
White knitted cardigan with a bow in the back, black jeans, and your favorite white fur snow boots. 
This wasn’t even a date, you reminded yourself for the hundredth time this past hour. 
Stop overthinking. 
“Theo’s here,” Cho peeked her head into the dorm. 
“Good luck babes, I expect a big debriefing session after,” she called out to you as you left.
“Hello..” you drawled out quietly waving as you approached Theo. 
He was wearing a navy blue sweater with the Slytherin scarf wrapped around his neck which put great emphasis on his eyes and broad shoulders. 
“Morning bella,” Theo greeted happily, holding out a hand to you. 
You cheesed and placed your hand into his.
“Do a spin for me bella ragazza,” he lifted your hand up and eyed you up and down as you spun around.
Even if it was an Italian word you didn’t know Theo still made it sound attractive, maybe you shouldn’t have worn a sweater from the quick rising of your body heat.
“Cute cardigan,” he complimented as he kept your hands intertwined, beginning your walk to Hogsmeade. 
“Thank you! I made it myself!” You looked up at him proudly while your other hand was toying with the hems. 
Theo could’ve swore that your eyes were the sparkliest things he’s ever seen. He felt as if could spend forever studying and mapping out the constellations in your eyes. 
“Really?” Theo gaped even though it wasn’t a huge surprise to him since he’s seen your sketches. 
“Yes!” You exclaimed happily knowing that there was finally someone other than your friends who cared about your passions and supported them. 
The two of you continued to walk hand in hand towards Hogsmeade. You talked and rambled on about the whole design process of your top while Theo pretended like he knew what you were talking about and definitely not just trying to make you talk more so he could hear your voice and watch your eyes sparkle with passion.
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dear-b0y · 7 months
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THIS IS AN MLM BLOG. WOMEN PLS DNI.
“Eyes on the mirror, puppy.”
Dom!Lucifer x shy m!reader
CW: NSFW, amab reader, praise, use of “puppy”, katoptronophilia, begging, handjob recieving, collaring, spit as lube
a/n: omg i wrote this at 2 in the morning
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You hated eye contact, but since you started dating the one and only Lucifer, he’d force eye contact almost all the time! Not only that, but when he would openly praise you in public, you could feel your cheeks burn.
Now this wasn’t your first time having intimacy with Lucifer, but this seemed a bit…erotic.
It started with you coming into his room to visit, setting some coffee on his desk with a small smile. He’d been working on things for quite a bit and you figured he deserved a break.
“Ah, thank you.” Lucifer said, taking a sip of the bitter tasting coffee—too bitter for your taste anyway. “You’re welcome,” you smiled. “You should take a break.” Lucifer set down the cup and turned his head towards you, his eyebrows raised.
“Oh?”
Such a simple word, yet it had such an effect…You cleared your throat and looked to the side for a split second before locking eyes with him. You mumbled awkwardly, “Well, you’ve been…um, in here for a while so..y’know.” He listened and nodded, standing up from his chair and now at his full height. You had to tilt your head up to see his face and it was a bit embarrassing to say the least. Lucifer’s hand met with your chin and he bent down a bit to give you a tender kiss. His lips were as soft as ever and you closed your eyes happily. He pulled away and brought you closer, your bodies touching one another. Your cheeks tinted red and you looked down at the floor. This didn’t go unnoticed by him and he gently brought your head up more. “Look at me, c’mon. We really need to work on that eye contact.” Lucifer teased. Your eyes darted back and forth from random things in the room and him before you hummed in agreement. His other hand went to yours and his fingers interlocked with yours.
He said smoothly, “I think we should work on that now, don’t you?” You tilted your head in slight confusion before he gave you a command. “Sit down.”
“Huh?” You questioned, “Like…in front of you?”
Lucifer nodded, smirking as you slowly kneeled before fully sitting on your knees. “Now look at me.” It took you a few moments before you actually did it, your eyes setting onto his. “That’s it, good puppy.” He praised and patted your head, to which your face flushed red. Chuckling, he told you to stay right there as he shuffled through his closet before pulling out a silver lined mirror. It looked pretty refined and you admired the design while he placed it in front of you. “What’s this for?”
“You’ll see.” said Lucifer. He positioned himself behind you and you watched him in the mirror. his hands reached to your neck and a black collar was locked around your neck. Your head snapped back to Lucifer, but he moved your head to face the mirror again. The collar was like that of a dogs, except it had a small lock in the middle. “U-umm..Lucifer?” Your voice trembled slightly as you spoke. “Just keep your eyes on the mirror my love.”
You said nothing and looked at him in the mirror, he seemed to be enjoying himself already. “Good boy..so obedient aren’t you?” He said, admiring how your face went red. His hands went under your shirt and you felt his cold fingers circle on your nipples. You flinched a little at his actions, but the sensitive buds hardened under his touch. Lucifer pinched one of them and your breath hitched while your eyes closed. He licked the shell of your ear and whispered in it, “What did i say, puppy? Eyes on the mirror.” Again, your eyes slowly opened and your gazed fixed on the mirror. Your breathing went shallow and you felt your cock start hardening against your pants. A small whine of both embarrassment and pleasure left your lips. His fingers left your sensitive nipples and trailed down, stopping at the zipper of your pants. “May I?” he asked, you nodded in consent. Lucifer whispered in your ear again while looking at you in the mirror. “Mm-mm. Use your words.”
You cursed in your head and muttered aloud, “I want it, please.” Your eyes flickered away from the mirror for a second before you remembered you weren’t allowed to do that. “Atta boy.”
His fingers fumbled with your zipper before getting it undone, also unbuttoning them. His hand reached to take out your half-hard cock, and then pryed open your mouth, deciding to use your saliva as lube for now. Lucifer’s hand went at a slow pace as he stroked it to a full erection. Your head fell back slightly in pleasure as you let out a shaky breath, then focusing your gaze back in the mirror. Your shaft now glistened with precum, the collar’s lock shining in the light and Lucifer’s smirk. He nibbled your earlobe, “It seems your enjoying this yes? I didn’t know my sweet boy would be a bit of a pervert..” He teased. To your mortification, his teasing comment only made you more needy. His hand moved now at a faster pace and you began to softly moan. You wanted to cover your mouth, but you knew he wouldn’t allow that. So like the obedient puppy you were, you kept your hands at your sides slightly clenched. “Ah—fuck..” you moaned, biting your lip. Lucifer started to whisper into your ear, his thumb rubbing your tip. “I have more ideas…this is just the beginning.” He started, “I wanna see your eyes roll back…your hands tied up. I want everybody to know how good I’m making you feel.”
Your legs began to shake a little, your ears tinting a pink color. His hand stroked your cock faster as he whispered these things into your ear, making you visualize everything he wanted to do to you.
“I’m going to tug you on a leash, you’d like that wouldn’t you? How about I make you call me master..”
Your eyes glaze over, looking at the way he plays with you in the mirror. Those small whines of yours began to gradually get louder, your body being forced in place by Lucifer’s to keep you from squirming. He noticed you trying to keep still. “Are you close, puppy? Let it out, sweetheart…”
With another change of pace, and the pressing of his thumb, you came hard. He stroked you throughout your high. This time, he said nothing as your eyes fluttered shut. However when you opened them, you saw him licking his fingers clean.
“How about we get started with the other things I mentioned, yes?”
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queers-gambit · 5 months
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Opening Night and Open Hearts
prompt: opening night - a mother's fear, a locked walk-in freezer, confessions through a thick metal door, questioning what's deserved, and a proposal at The Bear after hours.
pairing: Carmen 'Carmy' Berzatto x female!reader
fandom masterlist: FX's The Bear
word count: 9.8k+
note: i think i give enough background for you guys to feel as if you don't need to read any other relating works, but i linked the fics that could be read as a small series (maybe?) also let author be lonely in peace
warnings: reader nicknamed Peach, established relationship, cursing, spoilers, fluff, angst, relationship angst, hurt and comfort, Carmy still (desperately) needs a nap, depiction of physical illness, boys are dumb and emotions are hard, reader-insert, depiction of toxic family, OC Carmy that grovels a lot, not edited!
⚠️ season two, episode ten spoilers
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not necessary to read, but other relating works with Peach:
Dinner at the Homesick Restaurant
God's Plan part two: Two to Tango
Neon Sticky Notes
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"Hi, yes, I can hear you - sorry about that, I was just making note of your reservation," you spoke smoothly into the phone, trying not to ogle your boyfriend wrapped in only a clean blue towel. "So, that's a party of four for Monsieur Claude Badeaux - all right, that's so lovely. I'm obligated to remind everyone that tonight's opening is a fine dining experience and the proper, corresponding dress code is being asked for. Are there any allergies I should make note of for your party?"
"Jean Paul has a tree nut allergy," you were told.
"All right, that's noted and highlighted: Jean Paul has a tree nut allergy. If there's anything else I could help you with?"
"Non," he chuckled. "I was surprised to see your invitation to this evening, though, mon cher. It's been so long, yes?"
"Well, it was my pleasure to extend the offer, we're ecstatic by your reservation," you chuckled. "We'll see you tonight, Monsieur, and should you need anything before then, you may call this number again."
You said your parting words in French, smiling at Carmy when you hung up and dropped your work phone. "Did I hear that correct?" Your lover asked with a broad grin, "Was that...?"
"Senior marketing advisor at The Washington Post?" You filled in for him. "Uh, yeah, I think it was, but you know me - I could be wrong."
"You invited someone from The Washington Post to the opening tonight?"
"Is that okay?" You asked, standing from the bed after making note in your datebook. "You look kinda - I don't know, shocked?"
"I-I am," he blinked at you, watching you gather his pristine clothing to hang on the closet door. "But in a good way - I can't believe you did this," he chuckled, wiping his mouth. "I mean - holy shit, Peaches."
You offered a toothy grin, "Figured I could pull a few of my own strings to help get the word out about your love-child."
This made Carmy snicker, "Hey, now. Tonight's important, don't make fun."
"I know," you nodded, leading him back into the bathroom to view your hair products. "Which is why I invited some important people and some not-so important people. I know this is serious, Carmy," you smiled at him, hoping to convey your support, "and I wanted to help in whatever way I could."
"You being there tonight is more than I could ask for," he chuckled, helping you onto the small bathroom counter. You squirted a bit of hair product in your hand, watching him flinch back a little, "Uh, I just don't want my hair greasy, Peach, you know? Not a good look and I'll sweat it out in the kitchen."
"I feel like I should be offended by you having no trust in me," you teased, insisting, "I know whatcha need, baby, lemme help."
Carmy smiled softly and held still, letting you run your hands through his curls to push everything back and away from his forehead in a stylish but manageable "do". There was a silent, serene moment as you and Carmy just existed together in a mundane space, his big, sad eyes watching your face as you worked. He wondered, "Think tonight's gonna be okay?"
"I think tonight's gonna be more than okay," you assured softly. "I think tonight's gonna go better than you're anticipating."
He sighed and planted his hands on either side of you, suddenly dropping his gaze. "I, uh... Sugar invited Mom t'tonight..."
"Yeah, I know."
"You know?"
"Sugar and I are still friends outside of us dating, Carmy," you smiled patiently, slowing your hands so you more toyed with his curls; pushing some strands behind his ears. "She needs someone as much as you do and I don't mind."
"But isn't that what Pete's for?"
"Yes, but you know, Pete's Pete."
Carmy snorted, "Yeah, yeah, good point."
"I don't know if she'll show up tonight, Bear, but whether she does or doesn't, it won't matter - you're not doing this for her. This is for you, Carmy, tonight's about The Bear opening - it's about you and this incredible, amazing thing you've done. Okay?" You caressed both his cheeks in your hands so he could only look at you directly. "If she shows, that's great," you whispered with a soft smile as your thumbs swept the apples of his cheeks, "and if she doesn't, it won't make tonight any less special. That, I can promise."
Carmy's forehead met yours, both pausing to breathe together; peace always a fleeting feeling as of late and being something you both capitalized on. You brought him in closer for an embrace, his face burying in your neck as your arms snaked around his to keep him as close as possible. His arms were tight around your waist, legs spread to accommodate him; both needing the feel of being close before that night's inevitable stressful event.
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"Wow, well, don't you look all pretty! Wow, Peach," Pete greeted you when you scurried to the table with your friend in tow. "Oh, hi there!"
"Pete, this is my best friend, Danielle, and Dani, this is Pete, Sugar's husband."
"Hi, it's really nice to meet you," your friend greeted, the two instantly chattering as they both just blew past their introductions to instantly compliment one another's clothes. You smirked, knowing they'd get along famously, and looked around the brand new, packed restaurant.
"Hey, there she is, my pretty girl," Richie greeted smoothly, approaching your standing form to slide his hand around your shoulders.
"Hi, Cousin," you beamed, offering him a hug in greeting. "The place looks fantastic - it's so - I mean - just wow, Richie," you complimented. "You guys did such an amazing job. I need to tell Fak, too, this is - you guys should be so proud, it looks incredible. Hardly can believe what it was before this."
"It really is something, huh?" He grinned. "Hey, Pete," he nodded.
"Hey, Richie."
"And you must be the famous, the fabulous Miss Danielle?"
"That's me," your friend grinned. "You're Richie, right? Carmy's cousin who's not really a cousin but is as good as blood?"
"Yes, ma'am, the very same," he nodded with pride. "We've some drinks coming your way in just a moment, but I need to borrow Peach for just one second."
"Why do they call her Peach?" Dani asked, but Richie was leading you away as Pete was heard answering,
"Oh, because she mastered this peach cobbler with Carmy's mom, Donna, and she started the nickname..."
"What's wrong?" You asked softly with a smile as to not give the illusion to others that you were worried. "What can I do to help?"
"No, no, nothing too bad, you were just requested by the Frenchie-French guy."
"Oh, right, that's right, yeah, I can help with that," you sighed gently, smiling as you approached the table. Greeting the two men and women was easy, Richie impressed by your connections in the professional world. Tonight, The Washington Post didn't just dine with them - no, it was also the director of social media for three luxury, designer brands: Jean-Paul.
Yes, the man was so elusive that he just went by Jean-Paul. Fuck a last name!
Either way, it impressed Richie to hear the introductions. The two women were executives in their own companies, names Richie didn't catch because he was busy taking note of the way Mr. Frenchie-French was basically eye fucking you in front of them all.
"Well," Richie smiled stiffly, "tonight's incredibly special for us. In fact, uh, Y/N's boyfriend is the owner and head chef."
"Really?" Frenchie-French perked his brows, shifting his gaze over to you. "You always had a soft spots for chefs, non? For those who were versed in the culinary arts?"
"Well, mostly I appreciated a man in the kitchen simply because I burn water and would probably unintentionally starve myself," you teased easily, deflecting the man's subtle dig. "I'm actually here with family tonight, so, please, ladies and gentlemen, enjoy tonight - I know I'm biased when I say the food is exceptional, but I look forward to your own opinions."
"We will talk later, mon cher, I am sure there will be plenty to discuss," the Frenchman promised, kissing the back of your hand as you let Richie lead you away by your free hand.
You released a long sigh, muttering, "Bring them a bottle of real champagne, please, Richie, I had a few bottles imported just for them. Listen closely," you lowered your voice as you both paused on the side of the dining room, "bring them a bowl of thin sliced strawberries sprinkled in sugar and pop the cork at their table - it's impressive for whatever reason."
Richie pecked your temple and gave you a tight squeeze, "I got it all covered, girly. You all right? Look like you're gonna be sick?"
"Just men being men grosses me out, I guess," you sighed with a small shrug. "He's always had a thing for me, I figured I'd use that to get him here tonight - Carmy's work speaks for itself, but maybe he'd be inclined to publish an article or two for us if I play nice."
Richie paused you a few feet from your table, complimenting, "I hope Carmy knows he doesn't deserve you, Peach."
"You said years ago neither of us did," you smirked gently. "Said I wasn't relationship material, right? Remember?"
"I was wrong," he nodded. "I even said y'all would never be serious, but..." He scoffed to himself, "I've never seen that boy so crazy about anyone in his life. You've really changed him, Peach. I don't really know how to thank you."
"You can start by buttering up those flirty Frenchmen," you teased, giving his cheek a peck.
"On it," he winked, parting from your side.
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Inside the kitchen some twenty minutes later, Richie approached Carmy, directing his attention, "Cousin?"
"Yo."
"Peach is on 17 with Pete."
"Okay."
"Go say hi."
"Yeah, eventually," Carmy nodded absently, never halting his work.
"Eventually?" Richie repeated with distain, something in his stomach twisting.
"Where the fuck is Josh!?" Carmy called into the kitchen, another chef echoing his concerns.
"Yo!" Richie barked as calmly as he could, "Just go say hi to your girl, Cousin."
"Yo, I'll go when I have a minute," Carmy deflected strongly. "I'm in the fuckin' shit, leave me the fuck alone."
"What? I'm saying - "
"I'll get there when I can get there!"
"I'm saying!"
"What?" Carmy barked.
"She's got important fucking people in that dining room, man," Richie scoffed, hands held up in defense. "Just for your ungrateful ass! Maybe the least you can do is go say fuckin' hi - even if you're fuckin' busy. She knows that, it'd be a nice gesture - or whatever fuckin' shit - I don't know! She's your girl!"
"Yeah! Exactly!" Carmy barked. "She's my fuckin' girl, she knows the fuckin' drill, I'll go say fuckin' hi when I get the fuckin' chance, Richie! Fuck's sake! Always tryna meddle and shit!"
"Jesus, fuck," Richie sighed, turning out of the kitchen with his hands waving Carmy off in defeat.
You were none the wiser, entertained by Pete and Dani's gabbing as Sugar was in-and-out, dealing with all the little things going wrong. These little things came to her in the form of notes left at the table subtly for her to go solve, you wanting to help but being shot down every time. Eventually, Carmy was approaching your table with a tray of food, shocking you slightly.
"Hey, Peach," He greeted softly, lowering the tray to balance on the table and lean over to kiss your cheek. "You look gorgeous, baby, wow," he complimented in a whisper, offering another quick kiss.
"Thank you, Chef," you smiled brightly, touching his forearm in a sign of affection. "What's all this you've got for us?"
He hummed and explained what he set on the table in front of you guys; eyes alight and cheeks flushed from the heat of the kitchen. He poured whatever sauce came with the main dish, smiling at Dani, nodding to Pete, then looking to you.
"I'll check on you later, all right, baby?" He mumbled, watching you nod. "I gotta get back," he whispered, "but thank you for being here, my pretty girl."
"No where else I'd rather be, Cream," you rushed, letting his lips find yours briefly.
"Stick around after, would you? When we close, just... Don't leave yet."
"Yes, Chef," you whispered against his lips with a grin. He gave one single more kiss before pulling away to stand upright.
"Enjoy," he bid the table before walking away.
"So, like," Dani trailed after making sure Carmy was out of earshot, "when's the wedding? 'Cause that might've been the cutest thing I've seen. I mean, opening night, he's cooking, but paused to come serve us? Serve you? And he's so soft with you, kissin' you, bein' all cute," she pouted dramatically. "I want a reason to wear a maid of honor dress, please."
"Hey, hey, chill on us. There's no wedding," you sighed with a small laugh, trying to play off how the subject made your stomach twist. "We haven't really talked about it, you know? No biggie."
"What?" She sputtered. "Wait, hang on. Y'all have been together - like - a stupid, ridiculous amount of time. The fuck you mean you haven't talked about it? What are y'all doing, just ignoring the elephant in the room?"
You shrugged lightly, "I don't know, we know if we ever got married, it'd be to each other, but that's really it. We know we want to be together, we know we want to marry each other, but there's been no serious conversation about it."
"Uh, does that sound right to you?" Dani asked Pete.
He shook his head as you all took dainty bites of food to savor the flavors (and save Sugar some). "When I knew with Natalie, I didn't hesitate."
"Well, Carmy isn't like you, Pete," you defended. "He's got a lot on his plate, too, you know?"
"You've said that since Mikey," Dani frowned, her voice quiet.
"With good reason, don't you think? Carmy's just - he's just going through a lot right now and it's a challenge, you know?"
"No, it's more like Carmy's got the emotional intelligence of a fucking teaspoon!"
"Hey," you snapped, "that's not his fault, he doesn't know much better, so watch your mouth."
"He does with you, like... He knows better when he's with you, when it comes to you, Peach," Pete offered softly. "Look, maybe Danielle has a point - it is a little weird. I mean, you guys have been together, what? Six, almost seven years? Creeping up on a decade of just dating - that's a long time. And didn't you guys do that weird little half-dating thing for two years before making it official? Don't you think that's enough time to know if you want to marry someone, and then, you know? Actually marry them? Or at least ask them?"
"Sure, maybe to other people, but Carmy and I have never been conventional, so, I don't see why we need to start now."
Danielle scoffed, "Look, God love Carmy and everything, but you're just wasting time now. He needs to either commit or let you find someone who can actually love you like you deserve."
"Oh, and Carmy doesn't?"
"Wasn't all that long ago that you two took a break 'cause he called you clingy - and some other unsavory terms," Danielle shrugged. "Doesn't really sound like someone who loves you unconditionally - the way you should be loved."
You sighed and sat back in your chair, "I appreciate the insight, but Carm and I are fine. Okay? We've got years under our belts, we don't want to fuck up what obviously works for us so chill out on the questions, okay? I don't have answers to them."
Danielle and Pete shared a look before the man got up to excuse himself to the restroom. You and Dani finished your meals before sipping your wine, waiting for Pete, but Dani sighed, "This lady's been staring in here for, like, ten minutes already. It's freezing, doesn't she want to come in?"
"Hmm? What're you - ?"
"This lady on the street," your friend pointed over her shoulder towards the window her back was now turned to.
When you peaked out, you gasped lightly when you saw Donna Berzatto smoking a cigarette. "Oh, shit!" You stood from your seat, rushing, "Okay, so, uh, yeah - just - can you just sit here for a second? I have to go handle that."
"Who is it?" Dani wondered earnestly.
"I got it, Peach," Pete told you, passing by the table swiftly with a hand patting your shoulder to keep you at your table.
"What the hell's happening?" Dani asked. "Who is that?"
"Nothing, no one, it's okay, I think that's someone we know, just, uh, hang on a second? We'll be right back."
"Sure," she nodded in confusion, watching you get from your seat and follow Pete out the door onto the blistering cold sidewalk.
"Hey, Mama Donna," you greeted happily, arms crossing over your chest to protect from the wind. "Have you been inside yet? We saved you a seat and all, but isn't this - just wow?" You grinned, trying to encourage her to say anything about her children's hard work.
"Oh, no, no, not you, too, Peach, why are you here?" She groaned lightly, looking upset and close to tears.
"I'm here 'cause of Carmy? I-It's opening night, yeah?" You offered in confusion. "Why? What's wrong, Mama D?" You worried, glancing at an emotional Pete.
"No, it's just, I can't come in, I can't, just no," she backed away, only now making you notice the way Pete cried. "I'm so sorry, Peach, honey, but I was never here. Okay? I-I'll call them later, I swear, I promise, I'll call them - but I-I-I wasn't here. Okay? You can't tell them I was here. I'm so sorry."
"Donna, don't do this," you begged, head shaking. "Don't, please. Just come in with Pete and I - just sit there for a bit. Just come in and see what your kids have done - Donna, it's so beautiful. You'd be so proud, but you should really see it for yourself - "
"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I can't, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, not tonight, no, I'm sorry, I can't," she deflected in a rambling mumble, turning and hustling down the sidewalk with her head shaking like a Etch-A-Sketch.
You rounded on Pete, "What the hell was that? Pete, what just happened?"
"Um, I-I don't - I didn't mean to."
"Pete? What didn't you mean?"
"She didn't tell her mom about the baby," he rushed, tears falling. "Nat didn't tell Donna, Peach, and I think I just did - I think I just fucked up and told her."
"Oh, no... No, Pete, you didn't."
"I didn't mean to! I swear it was an accident!"
"No, I know you didn't mean to, honey," you rushed, opening your arms to bring him in for a tight hug. "Oh, you poor boy, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Pete."
He sighed, "I'm sorry, too, Peach."
"For what?"
"That... We fell in love with Berzattos and this is our new normal now, right?" He sniffled.
You half-smiled, "Yeah, something like that. But it's okay. See, where Donna's afraid to give her love, neither of us are. Sugar and Carm deserve that from us, right? To be authentic and just love them?"
He nodded, "Yeah, you're right."
"And that's all we gotta do... Is love them, Pete."
"God knows where else they'd get it," he huffed, wiping his face. "Hey, um, I'll be in, in a second - I just need a minute alone, I think, in the cold."
"Take all the time you need," you agreed.
"We're not - we're not telling them about this, right?"
You sighed, "No, I don't think so - at least right now. It might hurt them more, you know? To know Donna was here, but never came in. That she ran away... Again. It'll hurt, they deserve to be happy about tonight."
Pete nodded rapidly, looking like he was gonna burst into tears. Instead of going back inside, you just moved to Pete's side and stood there; producing a cigarette, lighting it, offering Pete a drag that he turned down, and the both of you just standing silently; one smoking, one crying, both processing.
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"Wow, look at these gorgeous ladies! By far the baddest in the whole place! Yeah, man!" Fak teased as he approached you and Danielle after closing the The Bear officially. "What a privilege to have you both dine with us this evening! Ugh, truly an honor to see you both here," he praised comically, evening giving a small bow that his brother mimicked.
Your eyes rolled, "You're laying it on really thick when I already tipped you." He snickered with Theo. "Hey, seriously, though, tonight was incredible. I mean, it was all so beautiful, you should all be so proud."
"Oh, we are," Neil giggled, his brother hanging off his shoulders.
"Good," you teased. "Uh, is now an okay time to go back and see him? Kinda wanna offer my compliments to the chef directly, you know?"
"No," Fak answered instantly, "uh, well, probably not the best time."
"Yeah, probably not," Theodore echoed.
"I can sense you two ramping up to something," you sighed, "so, I'm gonna ask you skip all that and tell me what's wrong. Why can't I go see my boyfriend? He just had an incredibly successful opening night, I kinda wanna kiss him if you don't mind."
"Um, well, h-he didn't want you to worry, so, he said not t'tell you, but, uh... Yeah, no, Carmy's, like, locked in the walk-in freezer. Han Solo style."
"What?"
"Locked in the walk-in," Fak nodded rapidly, "yeah, no, the handle - like, the whole handle came off. He's locked in, Peach..."
"Oh, my fucking God," you breathed. "Are you saying he - he missed opening night? Neil!"
"Yeah, kinda... Well, sorta - I mean, technically, but - "
"Oh, Jesus," you breezed past them all.
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"Mmm-mmm, the fridge guy's name is Terry," Tina corrected Carmy, flinching a little when he slapped the other side of the metal door he was locked behind.
"See, th-tha-that's what I'm talking about!" Carmy raged. "I'm so fucking distracted, and for what? For fucking what? 'Cause of a girl?" He chuckled ruefully to himself.
"Nuh-uh, don't do that, Carmy," Tina scolded. "That's not no girl, that's your girl, that's Peach - you don't lash out at her, baby."
"Yo, maybe - maybe I'm just not built for this. Right? Maybe that's okay! Maybe that just is. She'd be better off, Tina... I'm just - I'm not built for this."
But what Carmy didn't hear was Sydney asking Tina to cover her at the front because she needed to step out the back, get some air; Tina accepting and telling Carm to hang on a moment. Something he missed. While Tina took Syd's spot, Syd rushed outside, and you slipped in the kitchen door; Carmy being surrounded by shitty ripped tape and an entire side full of the flowers he had brought in for tonight - for you. It was a haunting reminder; something suffocating.
When you got to the walk-in, you were prepared to call out for Carmy, but he started speaking from within, halting any word on your tongue.
"I wasn't here b-because I was looking a-a-at fucking engagement rings when the fridge guy fuckin' called," Carmy ranted, your heart stalling in your chest. "Right? Like, what the fuck was I thinking? Like I was gonna get married? Commit to this relationship? Be h-her fucking husband or some shit? Have a fucking wife? I'm a fucking - I'm a fuckin' psycho!" He laughed a little, the tears springing to your eyes as his words disarmed your heart and emotional dam. "That's why! That's why I'm good at what I do! That's how I operate! I am the best because I didn't have any of this fuckin' bullshit, right? I could - I could focus and I could concentrate and I had a routine and I - and I had fuckin' cell reception, and Peach and I just had our own routine! We didn't need this extra bullshit, and now..."
You just listened, leaning on the freezer's door, tears silently leaking down your cheeks as you had the horrendous realization that you were what now slowed Carmy down. You were what currently stood in his way, when this whole time, you thought you were helping; making things easier; supporting him. No... No, his words rattled your heart to accept that you were now the bane; the object of his ire. You and your relationship was what was wrong and was causing Carmy hurt and professional complications.
Something you never wanted to contribute towards. You both always said if this relationship got to be too hard, you'd walk away. Better to feel anger than resentment; and now, you knew you had to walk away else risk that resentment fester.
Carmy started up again, "I don't need to provide amusement or enjoyment, I don't need to be someone's 'to have and to hold'. I don't need to receive any amusement or enjoyment, nor for someone to have and hold me... And I'm completely fine with that. Because no amount of good is worth how terrible this fucking feels." You were ready to open your mouth, but he finished by nailing the final nail in the coffin of your relationship, "It's just a complete waste of fuckin' time - entertaining what I know I shouldn't. Being in this relationship, trying to give what I don't have, wasting everyone's time."
You took your chance, speaking through your tears, "I'm really sorry you feel that way, Carmen."
"Peach?" Carmy rasped from behind the door, sounding more alert than he had before. "Baby? Hey, hey, Peaches? That you? Peach - hey. Hey," he sounded desperate as you backed away from the door, a fist pounding into the metal, "hey, no, Y/N? Y/N!" The seriousness settled over you both, Carmen understanding you heard a lot more than ever intended and once those words are out there, there's no getting them back. "Y/N, baby? Hey, no, no, Y/N - listen to me - hey, no, no! I-I didn't know you were there, baby, okay? No, Y/N, please - tell me you're there now, let me explain." He paused. "Let me explain! Please! C'mon, baby, please, let me fucking explain - tell me you're still there! Y/N? Y/N!"
You sniffled and walked away, feeling smaller than you ever had in your life. You barely noticed when the kitchen door opened, not until a figured dressed in black stopped you. "Peach? Hey, hey," Richie halted you - taking note of the tears. "What's wrong? What happened? Are you okay - who fuckin' did it?"
You just stared at Richie for a long moment, opening your mouth twice before sighing and smiling sadly. "I never wanted to be what got in his way," you whispered sadly. "I'm sorry, Richie."
"Peaches, hey, what's - "
But you reached up to kiss his cheek, "Tonight was so beautiful, Cousin, and I'm so fucking proud of you all. Thank you for everything - not just tonight, Richie, but everything you do." You smiled again, whispering, "Take care of him. Okay? He'll need you."
"What're you talking about? What's going on? Where are you going? Hey, where are you going, Peach, please?"
"Have a good night, Richie, I love you," you whispered, leaving out the kitchen door as quickly as you could. "Hey," you sniffled, approaching Dani with the Fak Brothers, "can we go now, please?"
"Are you okay?" Dani worried in shock.
"I'd really like to go, Dani, please," you rushed, throwing your coat on and smiling at the Brothers as if your heart wasn't in pieces. "Thanks again for tonight, you guys, it was magical."
"Peach? Wait, hey, are you okay, baby? What just happened?" Neil worried, watching you snatch Dani's hand, but pause when screaming was heard from the kitchen. Everyone stared at the door, Neil muttering, "The fuck are they...?"
"Now, Dani, please," you whimpered to your friend, who wasted no time in escorting you out of The Bear. The moment you were outside, you burst into sobs, Dani grunting a little as she lead you down a side alley to lean you on a brick wall and beg you to breathe normally.
"What the hell just happened? Hey, honey, you need to breathe," she smoothed hair off your face - but it was like you were drowning in the air with the way you gasped and gaped and panted and whimpered and choked yourself.
"I-I-I-I think - I think w-we're done, I think we're done, I think - oh, fuck - I think we just broke up," you sobbed, hands on your knees. "Oh, my God, Dani," you whimpered, "I-I think - I think we're done, Danielle, oh, my fucking God. I-I heard things tonight that I just - I can't not know, anymore! He said - fuck! He was just so candid, he didn't know I was there so h-he was sayin' things I have t-to now confront - and I really didn't fucking want to! He just - he doesn't want to really marry me, D, and-and-and he was apparently looking a-a-a-at rings - fucking engagement rings! But then he said that w-was the issue - he missed the fridge guy's call 'cause he was looking at fucking rings for me and this is why he missed opening night - 'cause the fucking fridge broke! Oh, my God, Danielle, i-i-it's my fault, it's my fucking fault, he missed the most important night of his life and it's my fault - "
You were cut off by your stomach lurching, emptying your insides onto the pavement. The delicious appetizer, the tantalizing main course, Marcus' fresh baked bread that was delightfully soft on the inside yet baked crisp on the outside, and every bit of the sweetened dessert - all wasted on Chicago bricks.
"Okay, okay, ah, shit, just get it out, babe, there you go," Danielle held your hair, catching you in a suffocating hug once you were done puking. "I've got you, babe, I've got you. You're okay, no, hey, this isn't your fault. I've got you, come on. I think we need pints of ice cream and the saltiest pretzels we can find," she pushed some hair from your sticky forehead, pouting dramatically, "maybe some Pepto? Few Saltines and ginger ale? C'mon, we're going back to mine, there's a good girl," she coaxed you from the ground and away from the wall, "c'mon, you're stronger than this. There's my girl, here we go, just one foot in front of the other - together, with me, just like that."
You sobbed, not knowing that Sydney and her father stood listening just a few feet away behind a set of dumpsters.
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The moment the freezer's door was open and Carmy was free, he was sprinting around the kitchen to grab his coat, leave Neil in charge of closing, and racing out the door as the Fak Brothers yelled at him for hurting your feelings.
"Hey, hey, hey, Chef! Carmy, wait!" Sydney chased him outside.
"No time!"
"Wait! She went with her friend!"
Carmy came to a tripping halt, catching himself before he hit the pavement before whirling around to approach her, "What?"
"Her friend? She was with some girl tonight?"
"Yeah - yeah, yeah, yeah, uh, um, that's - yeah, that's Danielle," Carmy nodded. "Her best friend, yeah, they were here tonight, sitting with Pete and Sugar."
"Listen, Carmy, I heard them when they left the restaurant... Peach was really upset, like, more upset than I've ever heard, saying you two broke up? Or something? She cried so hard, Carm, she actually threw up, it sounded like she was in genuine distress. I-I didn't know if I should've intervened, but her friend was with her and helping."
"Shit - fuck - Goddamnit," he seethed. "All right, thank you - "
"I doubt they went to your place, I think I heard her friend saying they were going to her apartment."
"Yeah, yeah, yeah, great, I know where Dani lives, thanks Syd!" Carmy bid, sprinting in the other direction - never bothering with the public bus system, just running into the night. Sydney was left to sigh on the sidewalk, Neil and Theo joining her before Richie followed - all watching Carmy disappear down the sidewalk.
"He's a fucking idiot," Richie shook his head.
"What the hell even happened?" Syd asked.
"Carmy mouthed off in the walk-in, Peach heard it all," Richie supplied. "You know the dumbass was gonna propose tonight?"
"What?" Syd blinked in shock.
"Yeah," Neil tacked on, "we had a whole plan and everything. Candles, soft music, flowers - there's a bunch of flower bouquets in the walk-in."
"I'm sure that was hard for Carm to look at," Syd sympathized.
"Doesn't excuse whatever he said," Richie snapped. "She looked devastated."
"She cried so hard, she threw up in the alley," Syd frowned.
"How do you know?" Neil asked.
"I heard her," the other chef frowned. "My dad and I - we actually both heard her."
"Jesus fuck," Richie seethed.
"I mean... Should we still set up?" Theo wondered to his brother. "What if they kiss and make up, like always? Carmy might still wanna go through with the proposal, right? You know?"
"Maybe," Neil trailed, looking at Richie.
"I don't fucking know," he sighed, hands on his hips.
"She thinks they broke up, I imagine whatever she heard was pretty nasty," Sydney frowned. "Think they'll really make up tonight?"
"Let's hope," Richie sighed. "That fuckin' idiot isn't gonna find anyone better than Peach. Fuck," he looked around the city street. "All right, fuck it, fine, let's fucking set up. Not like the jackass deserves it, but let's do it for Peach."
Neil and his brother grinned at each other, turning to hustle back into The Bear - leaving Sydney and Richie on the street. No words were exchanged, just silent shakes of their heads before they followed the Faks with the intention to help set up for a proposal nobody even knew if would still happen.
The cold night burned Carmy's lungs, but it was nothing compared to the feeling of suffocation he felt earlier when listening to one of your voicemails while trapped.
Your words were sweet as pie, as they usually were; a voicemail left when you were still at work, but feeling so excited to see him that night that you just had to call him. You reminded him of the adoration and love you held for him, relaying how proud you felt - and that you knew Mikey would be, too. You were always doing that, reassuring Carmy; and maybe that's why he felt so freaked out, he wasn't used to it. Even after almost 7 years together, he just wasn't used to what he didn't know he deserved.
Because Carmy didn't think he deserved anything remotely close to love, understanding, compassion, patience, and / or reassurance.
He had sobbed out loud as he locked his phone, not having the heart to delete your message. He often never did - he liked listening to your voice on long, hard nights; it brought him peace when the world felt too loud. He also kept whatever little notes you left for him, even going as far as to get a few of your hand-drawn hearts tattooed on his forearm. One for each anniversary you've shared together. He realized he never wanted to be without you and all his doubts and fear was him projecting his own incompetence towards this relationship; so, he locked his phone, he didn't delete your message.
The moment the fridge door had been opened, Carmy was out of there, shot off like a Roman Candle - your words of love and understanding still ringing in his ears as he was freed. He needed to apologize, and he needed to apologize right fucking now.
The whole run to Danielle's apartment, Carmy wasn't sure what to say to you; mulling over different ideas in his head. He tried to plan his speech, but the only thing he could think of was how much he loved you and that the ring in his pocket weighed a hundred pounds.
He pounded at Danielle's door. Carmy paced slightly as he waited, knocking frantically, and surely waking the neighbors - but that didn't matter. All that mattered was talking to you, something he was desperate to accomplish. When the door opened, your friend offered a stale look and shook her head, "Nope."
"Dani, please," he halted the closing door, "it's all a misunderstanding, I swear to God, please, just - let me try to fix this. Please, okay? I-I need her - I fucking need her and I have to fix this 'cause she's all that matters, okay? So, let me talk to her - please. Please, Danielle!"
"Yeah? The only thing?"
"More than anyone, more than anything - more than The fucking Bear, I swear to fucking God, Danielle! Just - Just one chance, please. I-I don't know how it all got so fucked, but please, I have to try - "
"Whatever you said in that freezer, Carmen, fucking gutted her, you hear me?" Dani stood in her doorway protectively. "Should've had your ass frozen for the hurt you caused her. How the fuck do you intend on making this right? Huh? It's been almost a fucking decade, dude, if you're seriously still afraid of commitment, just fuck off and leave her alone. Let her walk away 'cause I promise, there's a line of dudes who would love to put a ring on her loyal-ass finger - "
"Please, let me fix this," Carmy begged, sounding close to tears. "I need her, Danielle, please."
"It's okay, D," a voice whispered from behind Danielle, and when she turned, you were revealed - jacket and purse in hand, looking completely exhausted, drained, and disheveled. "I'm just tired, Dani, but we have to talk about this... So, I'll go home with him and call you tomorrow, okay?"
"You sure?"
"It's a decent walk, gives us too much time to talk," you shrugged, refusing to meet Carmy's bloodshot eyes. "Thanks for tonight, sorry I was such a mess," you whispered, hugging your best friend since pre-school.
"Girl, don't you ever apologize to me. But hey, look, I don't know, you were just drowning in your tears, like, five minutes ago. Sure you really wanna go? You can stay here as long as you'd like, girl, fuck him."
"Better to work it out now than later, I guess," you whispered, letting her kiss your cheek and see you guys out.
"She calls me cryin', Carmen, I'll kick your ass," She threatened as you moved down the apartment's hall. You might've snickered just a little, but the amusement was wiped clean when you rounded the corner and came up to the elevators.
Now that it was just you two, it was dreadfully awkward.
"Baby - "
"Just - don't talk for right now, Carmen," you sighed, shaking your head. "I'm still digesting all you said."
He frowned when you walked onto the elevator without a single emotion on your face, following you, and when on the ground floor, moved out to head home. It was quiet, it was awkward; only the sounds of traffic filling the space between you as you walked.
"Listen," he started with a long sigh, "you came in at the worst time, Peach, heard some shit you shouldn't have that I-I didn't even mean. I was just," he paused, sighing, "really angry and frustrated, fucking running my mouth 'cause I didn't know what else to do."
"Sounded like I came in at the best time since you're not very forthcoming with emotions. So, hearing your confession put a lot in perspective for me, Carm."
"I was just angry, Peach," he frowned, hands deep in his pockets. "Felt like I was self sabotaging myself, I wasn't sure what else to feel. So, I just lashed out. I didn't mean it, but I just felt like being angry... So fucking angry, baby, I just - I didn't know what else to feel."
"I don't know if I can be with someone like that," you whispered. "Someone who throws our relationship under the bus when he's angry, someone who's first line of defense is apparently to blame the relationship he's been in for over half a decade with the same girl. Someone you've known your whole life..."
"Peach - "
"If it's that easy for you to just disregard us, I don't think we should continue this."
Carmy took a breath and reached out to pull you to a stop. He dug in his pocket for a moment, then showed you the black velvet jewelry box. "I was gonna propose tonight, when everyone was gone," he explained when you took the box to open gingerly. "I think because that was on my mind already, something I was more than nervous to actually do, you're right, it did become my first line of defense to blame us - not just you, baby, but us. You and me... Mostly me, though," he chuckled sadly. "You're this perfect, sweet angel who just loves me out loud when I don't deserve it, and I'm... I'm just me," he sighed, eyes reddening. "And I know I'm never gonna be enough for you, I think I started to get in my head about if you said no. How I missed the call from Terry about the fridge 'cause I was picking out an engagement ring that you didn't even want, that you rejected - rejected me; and in turn, I missed opening night, and it all just - it got to a boiling point. Look, Peach, it's never been a secret that I don't think I deserve you... But I wanted to be the man that could at least give you an honest try of my best. You've stuck by me the past seven years when you should've ran for the hills, and I knew I wanted us for life years ago - but everything was still so up in the air. So confusing. So fucked up. I figured, after opening tonight, if things went t'plan, I could propose - prove to you that we're on our feet and there weren't any rugs to be pulled."
"What if things didn't go to plan?" You whispered.
"We're kinda living it now," he admitted, hand rubbing the back of his neck. "But even if tonight was all a total failure, I know I might've still done it because it's you, Peach. It's you... I've known for years you're who I want, I just never knew how to do this - to move us forward. You're my first relationship, hopefully my only relationship, and I just didn't know how to advance us. I think when things got real for me, my insecurities crept in, and I just reacted - I didn't think."
"We always said when this wasn't healthy or when this wasn't good for us anymore, we'd walk away," you reminded. "That we'd rather be sad or angry about a breakup instead of letting resentment fester from being together."
"It's still good for me, Peach, we're still good," he whispered, stepping closer. "Is it still good for you? Or did I lose you completely tonight?"
"I don't know, Carmy, you've been lashing out a lot lately. At me specifically."
"And with The Bear now open, I-I should be okay. You know? Back to normal?"
You chuckled dryly, "I see, back to your high walls? Emotional constipation?"
"Then maybe not normal," he corrected, "because I just needed to get us here, to tonight, to opening, and then show you that it's over. Show you that part of our lives is over and we only have more adventures to look forward to. Not ones like this, though," he gestured up the street, your eyes cutting over and realizing you were back at The Bear.
"Do you really think you're a psycho?"
He chuckled, "After tonight? Yeah, pretty convinced... Plus, I, uh, I saw in the freezer the way we're labeling things - and got angry about it. Angry about the way we were tearing tape and labeling things. It was so fucking stupid, but I just - I felt so crazy. I still do, I still feel like my head doesn't make sense and I'm a bit, you know... Crazy."
You nodded slowly, "Then how can you promise me this kinda shit won't happen again?"
"I don't think I can, but I can make you the promise that I am working on it; trying to identify when I feel reactive, trying to calm that down. I'm trying, Peach, I really am - it's just... Taking a lot of time," he sighed sadly. "And I know you don't have any more left to give me."
"I've already given you this many years," you reminded softly, "I think I could spare another or two if it meant you getting your shit together, that you get better, stop feeling so crazy."
"I don't deserve anymore time - "
"I think you need to step back and reevaluate what it means to be deserving because you always say that. That you don't deserve something - even as simple as time. Everyone deserves time and opportunity to figure shit out, Carmy, and you're no exception."
He nodded, "I'm... Trying." He took a long, deep breath, "I'm, uh... Going to meetings, you know, like, uh, Al-Anon and whatever."
"That's good, they're there to help," you nodded, stepping closer to take his hands in yours after closing the ring box and stuffing it back in his pocket. "Now, I think you need to do something."
"Anything, Peach."
"Take my hand, bring me back to The Bear, and go about your plan."
He froze in shock, blinking at you in earnest, "You really mean that?"
"Do I look like I'm joking?"
"No, ma'am, and I think that scares me more."
"You'd rather break up? 'Cause at this point, Carm, we either move forward with this engagement and fucking work our shit out, or we break up. It's been almost a decade. It's your choice, you're the one who was saying he couldn't be someone's husband, that he didn't need to provide anyone nor have them provide you with anything. So, you tell me what you want to do - because all I know is that I love you, I want you for life, but not if you're going to resent me and regret moving our relationship forward. I don't need to get married, Carmy, but you can't keep jerking me around like you have been. So... Make a decision based on what you want - based on what's best for you. Not what's best for us, but put yourself first right now, Carmy, and make a decision about what you want."
With a nod of his head, Carmy cleared his throat and offered you his hand. When he felt you lock your fingers with his, he glanced up and down the street, then lead you across it. Up the sidewalk and to the front door of The illuminating Bear, he paused to produce his keys and then lead you inside.
The lights were dim, but a flip of the switch brightly lit up the newly constructed restaurant. He seemed nervous at your cool demeanor, watching you shed your coat and set your purse down; but his hand took yours again and lead you further into the place. He seemed nervous, but once in the kitchen, it was almost like Carmy's stress melted away.
"I was... I had this plan," he explained softly, leaning on one of the work stations with both hands in yours to keep you in front of him. "I have all these candles, right? Was gonna distract you in here," he looked around the fluorescent lighting, "while Richie, Fak, Tina, and the others set everything up. We'd hang in here after the place was closed down, you know, show you around the completed kitchen. And really casually, I'd ask if you were ready to go, so, we'd go out the front, and we'd walk right into the candlelight..."
"Yeah?" He nodded, thumbs running over your hands as he pushed off the counter. "Don't deviate from your plan now..."
Carmy smirked, "Wanna hear the boring kitchen stuff?"
"Of course, I do."
So, he lead you around in a tour of the kitchen; showing off the new office space that he invited you to take advantage of whenever you wanted. The sleek appliances were shown off, the vast fridges, freezers, new cutlery, state-of-the-art dishwashers. Everything, he showed you, knowing you helped him pick a lot of it out - it was still nice to see it all come together finally.
And then, slowly, he lead you out of the kitchen, but to your honest shock, the dining room was covered in lit candles and different bouquets of thick, gorgeous floral arrangements. "Oh, holy shit," you breathed, Carmy hiding his confusion much better than you.
You came to a slow halt in the middle of the room, the lights out and only leaving the candles to provide an ambiance. "I had this whole speech planned, too," Carmy told you softly. "Remind you of the day we met, how you saved me from those jackass bullies - remember?"
You smiled softly, emotions swirling in your chest, "First day of first grade, you had a Buzz Lightyear backpack and some kids were picking on you 'cause of it."
"And what did you do?"
You felt bashful remembering, but humored him by answering, "Pushed their faces in the mud at recess and made them apologize."
"You've been my best friend since that day," he nodded, bringing you in a few steps closer. "And when we got to high school, my feelings changed. You weren't just my best friend, but the girl I was madly in love with... Took me a couple years to buck up the courage to ask you out officially, though."
"Sure took your sweet time," you whispered with a smile, "but all good things to those who wait, right?"
"And I think you've waited long enough for a man to be who you deserve," he frowned. "All these years - it's been you at my side. You even - fuck - you even came over to Amsterdam for a bit because I was feeling overwhelmed and lonely. Sad, maybe even a little homesick. But you just - you just showed up like it was the most common thing in the world."
You chuckled through your tears, "Yeah, we had some good times on that boat, didn't we?"
He nodded with a softening smile, pushing hair from your face and behind your ear; pausing to hold your cheek carefully. "And when we came back stateside... You were still the only constant presence in my life. You were my family without blood, and I knew after that Christmas that you'd forever be my other half, and I'd spend my life conveying how grateful I am for you. I just - I never knew how to put it into words until now."
"What changed?"
"Realizing that I wanted to marry you years ago - and I should've. I know I shouldn't have drug my feet with us, delay our inevitable, because honestly? I couldn't see my life without you in it and I knew I needed you with me forever. Peach," he frowned, reaching for your other cheek, "we agreed when this wasn't healthy, we'd walk away - I remember that. But I need you to know, I'll never fucking regret you. I'll never resent you. You've been unwaveringly supportive and loving and... And I've been the luckiest man to experience it all. But now," he pushed himself a step closer so he was hovered over your lips, "I know that you deserve someone just as present in this relationship as you are. I knew once The Bear was done, I was done - I was done beating this bush around and wasting time. I knew what I needed to do because the idea of you not being in my life anymore terrifies me more than anything. I don't remember life without you, Peach, and I don't ever want to know what it's like. So," he cleared his throat, "here, in the restaurant I so desperately wanted to give up on so many times, but you always stopped me, I wanted to make this official. I wanted it to be here to show you that the past year of our turmoil - it's fucking over, Peach. We did it," he whispered, "and now, the next and only thing I want to focus on is us."
Carmy readjusted you both for a little bit of space, holding your left hand tightly as he lowered himself to a single knee; looking up at you with those big, wide, sad blue eyes that were growing redder by the passing second. The candlelight created a romantic atmosphere that cocooned you both in a warm embrace, the flowers around you projecting their floral scent.
"So, I need to ask you something real important, baby," he whispered, his throat bobbing to restrain his emotion that clawed up his throat, "because if I don't, I don't think I could breathe again." He cleared his throat, pulling the ring box from his pocket and opening it to present to you officially. "Y/F/N Y/M/N Y/L/N... My sweetest Peach, I've loved you almost my entire life, you're my best friend, my most loyal and sweetest confidant. You make me want to be a man better than I was yesterday and never before have I ever seriously considered marriage - until you. Now? Now, I can't get the idea out of my head, so, my sweet girl," he took another breath, the tears in his eyes swelling and slowly dripping down his cheeks as you slowly got on your knees in front of him, "I need to ask you... W-Would you do me the honor? Of being my wife?"
"Carmen."
He grinned at you, both with tears down your cheeks. "Will you marry me, Y/N? I can't see my life without you in it, so... I want this, I want you for life. Y/N, will you marry me?" He paused, adding a meek little, "Please?" at the end.
With a deep breath, you slowly reached for his cheeks in a soft caress to wipe his tears; both just staring at one another for a good few moments before a face-splitting grin nearly cracked your lips. "Yes," you finally answered, "yeah, yes, yes, of course, I'll marry you, Carmen, yes!"
"Oh, thank fuckin' God," he laughed, letting you lunge forward to knock him backward in a hug - missing the candles arranged in a small circle for you two to stand in. Carmy laughed loudly, happily, giving you a tight squeeze as he mused, "Had my heart beatin' outta my chest for a second there, Peach."
"Oh, please," you laughed, "after all this time, you really thought I'd say no?"
He shrugged meekly, "Thought my most recent fuck-ups would've added to any reasons you might have to say no."
"Oh, spare me - you're my best friend, Carmy, you know I couldn't ever say no to you. Not without puking in nervousness."
"Can we maybe not talk about puke when we just got engaged?"
You laughed and nodded, "Fine, fine, fine, then put the ring on, please."
You presented your left manicured hand, watching Carmy almost giddily removed the band from the box, took a slow, deep breath, and then, the most beautiful ring was being slid onto your finger in an official show of your engagement. Of your undying love. Of your commitment, promises, and future together.
"YEAH!" An array of varying cheers and hollers of support and excitement rang out around you; startling both you and Carmy to look up. Richie, Sydney, Tina, Neil, Theo, Pete, and Sugar all hung in the bathroom's alcove - watching with splitting grins and cheering in celebration.
There was no time to question them as Richie lead the charge over; helping you to your feet for a giant, bear hug before gushing over your engagement ring. Neil and Theo popped one of the authentic bottles of champagne, pouring different flutes for those present.
"Calm down," Natalie scolded Richie lightly, "and move out the way, I want to hug my engaged bestie!"
You squealed with Sugar when her arms wrapped around you tightly, Rich moving on to congratulate Carmy - who apologized for his angry words earlier and thanked them for still setting things up. Richie promised it was for you, not Carmy, but still hugged the little shit with a laugh - indicating he was just joking.
"Let me see!" Natalie grinned, examining the ring Carmy chose and squealing again. "Oh, my God! Oh, it's so pretty! Oh, shit - sisters!" She gasped, holding your hands tightly, "We're going to be sisters - like, officially!"
"Sisters in law, but yeah, cupcake," you beamed at her, wiping your tears and giggling. "I can't - this just doesn't feel real," you told her softly, looking the few feet over to see Carmy with the lads as Sydney stood with you and Sugar. "Him proposing? I genuinely thought it wouldn't happen," you tried to laugh your nerves off, looking at your ring and fiddling with it.
"Yeah, right," Sydney laughed. "I haven't been around that long and even I knew this was gonna happen."
"Oh, please, she's right," Natalie grinned when you went to retaliate, "he first started talking about how he wanted to marry you when he was, like, 15. This has been the longest thing coming."
"Thank you guys for helping," you whispered with a smile. "It's all so beautiful."
"Happy to help for a good cause," Syd smiled, complimenting your ring as Neil called for a toast. Everyone was given flutes of champagne, Carmy's arm wrapping around your waist as each friend gave their own little speech, congratulating you both before the alcohol was being drained.
"Uh, and where are you two going?" Sugar asked about an hour later with a small giggle when Carmy wrapped an arm around your neck after helping you into your coat again.
"Gotta celebrate alone with my fiancé," he smirked, "later, guys! Don't forget to lock up!"
"Carmen!" You scolded with a small laugh, gaping at him.
"What? They got this," Carmy chuckled. "Thanks, you guys, see you tomorrow!"
"We can help clean," you told him as he lead you out of the restaurant.
"Nah, we've got bigger plans," he smirked at you. "Got plenty t'celebrate, yeah? Ever fucked as fiancés before?"
"No - but I hear it's some crazy sex," you whispered, locking your arms around his waist to stay close. Neither of you cared about the bus at this hour, opting to walk home in the cold - not that you felt it. Your love burned brighter than the cold biting your skin.
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requesting rules and masterlist
The Bear masterlist
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28 / 1.7k / soap soulmate au, part 5
...
Soap stares at his name where it's inked across your skin. You should be his enemy. He's sitting across from you, your interrogator in this dimly lit weapons closet. You refuse to look at him. But his gaze bores into you anyway, intense on your eyes, your lips, the cuts and bruises on your face. He wants you. But he can only have you once you've given him the information Captain Price needs.
"Tell me where Alejandro is," he says. "That's all you need to do."
A muscle in your jaw twitches when he mentions Graves' name, but you bite your tongue. You won't let him shake your resolve like he did in Las Almas. You should've killed him on sight.
"What Graves is doing to Alejandro--you know it's wrong." Soap’s gaze is steady. You're so close. He wants you so badly it hurts. "He's not a good man.”
"You have no idea what kind of man he is," you say.
"I know exactly the kind of man he is," he growls. "I saw what he did to the people in Las Almas. He called them dirty cops and had them executed when they said they didn't know anything. Innocent people. In front of their families. Their children." Soap's hands curl into fists on the table between you. "He's not the kind of man who deserves your loyalty."
Your cuffs clink as your arms flex against the chair. "You wouldn't understand."
"You're right. I wouldn't." Soap's knuckles pop, his voice low and dark. All his life he's waited for you. Now Graves--fucking Graves, who betrayed Soap and his team and tried to murder them all--is somehow the one keeping you from him. "I don't understand what you see in that bastard."
You say nothing, eyes trained on the far wall.
Soap's shoulders tighten. "You're just a tool to him."
"I’m a soldier. I choose to follow orders. So do you.”
"You're following his orders. You think that makes you a soldier, being a weapon? No. Makes you a damn dog."
You say nothing.
Soap grips the table until it creaks. "You think he cares about you.”
"It doesn't matter if he does or not."
"It does so bloody matter. You’re no’ some pawn he can just throw away." God damn you. He wants to grab you with both hands and shake you. To hell with this interrogation--he's got half a mind to lock you down somewhere padded until you get it through your skull that you're not worthless. He scowls at you. "You're better than this. You have to be."
Cold irritation seeps through your mask. "Am I?" Soulmate or not, he doesn’t know you.
At the look on your face, Soap's scowl deepens. He's going to kill that bastard, and he's going to do it slowly. "What about Graves is more important to you than the innocent lives he took? Does that mean nothing to you?”
"Orders are orders."
Soap's voice drops to a dangerous pitch. "Look me in the eye and say that.”
You don’t. You tell yourself it’s because he has no power over you. He can’t tell you what to do.
Soap crosses his arms. "'S what I thought. You're bluffing."
"I'm not."
"Bullshit. Graves is nothing but Shepherd's lapdog. Gettin’ paid to commit goddamn war crimes.”
"Shut your mouth," you snap. "You have no idea what happened--"
You stumble on the next syllable and go silent, realizing suddenly that you're looking him in the eye.
Johnny's a man of impulse, and it takes all the self-control he has to keep himself in place the moment you lock eyes. The pull he feels to you right now is overwhelming. You're in reach. He leans forward. Those brilliant blue eyes of his see all the way down into your soul. They’re just the same as you remember--eerily vivid, pupils blown, with his jaw set hard.
"What happened to what, darlin'?"
You shift, skin prickling. You want to cross your arms over yourself and clap your hand over the soulmark on your neck. "You don't know what happened in Al Mazrah."
"You were ambushed."
You nod, remembering that night of the mission. You've seen your squadmates die before. It's a hazard of the job, part of being a mercenary. But that night--seeing so many Shadows gunned down before they could so much as draw their weapons--it still haunts you.
"Shepard didn't know. It wasn't like we-- it was supposed to be a simple transport mission."
"It was a black bag op."
"That's what Shadows do. We take missions people don't like. Someone has to step in where you military dogs won't."
"Where was Shepherd when it went tits up, hm?" Soap's lip curls. "No air support on an illegal op. He left you to be killed. And now he needs someone to blame. It's not gonna be him taking that bullet. It's gonna be you."
"Captain Graves can handle it."
Soap lets out a rough sigh. Your insistence on Graves is rubbing him raw. You could have died on that op two months ago. And then what? He'd have never met you, only found your name later in stone on some memorial somewhere. The thought makes his chest go cold and his blood run hot. It could still happen. If he can't tear you away from this bloody mercenary work, you'll never be his. Christ. He can't let that happen. He won't. You're not going back to the Shadow Company. He'll tear Graves into pieces before he lets that happen.
He fixates on your soulmark again. Why can't he focus on getting the information Price needs? All he can think about right now is the scab on your lip, the way your pupils dilate when you look at him. Your body wants his even as you're spitting venom. The fire in you matches his own, and he wants more.
"Graves isn't here," Soap tells you. "And I'm not takin’ chances. You’re not going back to Shepherd, and you’re sure as hell not going back to Graves. You're mine."
You pull on your cuffs, hating the way the possessive note in his voice makes your stomach flip. "You don't get to decide that."
"Neither do you.”
"Isn't a matter of choice. It's a matter of what you’re gonnae do about it."
You swallow and watch his gaze track down your throat. He's close. When did he lean in? Why aren't you pulling back?
No, you tell yourself, you’re not scared. You’re in control. You lean a millimeter closer. "You can't keep me here."
His eyes brighten, gaze so intense it warms your skin. "Careful, darlin'. You don't want to throw down that gauntlet."
"And you expect me to tell you whatever you want to know? Fuck my career, fuck my squadmates?"
"If you weren't so damn dense, I'd--" He mutters another string of curses in that thick Scottish accent, standing from his chair and pacing the tight room. "You don't understand what I'm offerin’. You don't need them. You have me an' mine."
He circles around to your side of the interrogation table and kneels next to you, his expression an open plea for you to listen. You stare down at him with your heart suddenly in your throat. You can't backpedal. You can't look away.
He searches your face. Even roughed up, even pissing him off, you're beautiful. Damn it, he's going to do something stupid if he doesn't control himself.
He keeps his voice low and even. "You were expendable to them. You're expendable to Graves. You're no' expendable to me." He reaches up to you, and you go still. His hand is hot on your skin. His grip is surely strong enough to break bone. But only his thumb drags along your lip. His eyes follow the motion. "Your loyalty should be for people who care about you. I'm on your side, ya wee shite. Just tell me how to get to Alejandro and I'll get you out of here. I'll make sure you're safe. That's all I need to know."
You stare down at him. Your heart beats in your ears, and his pulse hammers with yours. You can feel it through his thumb against the sensitive skin on your lower lip.
Johnny wants you so badly you almost give in. He thinks he's telling the truth--that he'll protect you. But he doesn't know any better. You're not who he wants you to be. You're not soft. You're not good. Why does he act like he can see something redeemable in you?
Being his soulmate doesn't guarantee you a goddamn thing. Promises don't afford you any more protection than you've already given yourself. You know that very well. People aren't reliable. Soulmarks don’t fix everything. They’re just ink.
Whatever he sees when he looks up at you makes something cold and sharp settle in his chest. His throat constricts. He's pushing, he knows he is, and it's the wrong move with you. He's never been this desperate for anyone.
"Darlin'. Don't do that. Don't shut me out." His voice wavers just like his resolve. He'd protect you to his last. You refuse to see that, and he can't make you.
You look away, pulling away from his hand. "I don't trust you."
Johnny's stomach drops, and he digs his fingers into the metal chair to stop himself from digging them into you.
You want him. He can see it in the set of your shoulders, how tight you hold yourself when he's close to you. You want him despite yourself, and you still refuse. It doesn't matter how rational a decision it should be to accept his help. There's something else happening in your head that's keeping your walls up, and he's starting to realize it's not just Graves. It can't be.
He watches you for a long moment. He doesn't want you to hurt, but he's not stupid enough to believe you'll soften up and come around with time. You're a soldier.
Finally, Soap stands. If you don’t tell him what he needs to know, you’ll remain a hostage, and won’t be able to have you. He won’t accept that.
"Fine," he says, pushing his way out the door. "We’ll do this the hard way."
...
part 1 / part 2 / part 3 / part 4 / [part 5] / part 6 / part 7 / part 8 / part 9 / part 10
more Soap / masterlist tag
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heartfullofleeches · 6 months
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Titus [Space Emperor Yan] and former Assassin Cat-Hybrid Darling. (Just a blurbo for now but I love these two now so I'd love to come back to this)
When the pair met, Darling thought Titus was no different from the rest of their targets. A self proclaimed god untouchable by those below him. Little did they know that their employers were basically setting them up on a suicide mention as the tyrant is a damn near immortal deity. As they perch atop his bed - knife planted in his chest, Darling counts their cards as a large hand locks around their wrist; pulling the blade out as one night remove a splinter. There was nowhere for them to run. The element of surprise had been swept from under their feet. They struggle and claw at the man, but there is no give to his iron grasp. As their brain draws to any conclusion a trapped animal may have, the knife in their hands is tossed across the room before they can take the final plunge.
The Emperor should have his little intruder punished. Waking a kind from his beauty rest is a serious offense. A crime in which the accused receives no trial and punished to the highest degree. Their eyelids removed so they never experience another second of slumber before their execution. There is also the more "amusing" route of electrocution or burning everytime they attempt to shut their eyes. Darling surely would have been subjected to this fate if they weren't so... So...
Precious~
Did this adorable little feline really think they could kill a god so easily? They insult him, but fortunately for them, they're cute enough for him to let it slide. The poor thing could use a bath though... And those scars.... When was the last time they had a proper meal? Oh, and those rags!
Titus scoops up the feisty kitty and thrusts them into the hands of his guards while he sorts through his closet for something to throw on until he can get them measured. Darling attempts to flee any chance they are alone, but with Titus promising to have the heads of everyone in the palace if they escaped - they never got far. Once they had some food in them and fully realized Titus wasn't bluffing when he called his home their new place of resident - Darling came up with a plan to lure Titus into false security and learn his witness to take him down when he least expected it. The only flaw in their plan was they underestimate their own commitment to the role as day by day their acceptance of the tyrant's obsession became less of an act.
They no longer had to work for their meals. Everything they could ever deserve was thrust placed right in their hands if they snuggled up to their new master or swished their tail just right in Union with those big adorable eyes. Their word stood above all in his counsel. They were waited on hand and foot by everyone under Titus' rulevIt was paradise. Their former comrades and the person they once were would be disgusted by what they've become, but if the former ever came to drag them back to their old ways they were swiftly cut down without so much as a passing glance from the royal that once stood beside them.
Titus is ever so glad he managed to bag that angry stray and turn them into the sweetest lil dear anyone has ever seen. He nearly loses his composure everytime he catches them lazying around in his robes - cloth barely clinging to their smaller figure. He knows they only do it to make sure he never says no to him, but there's hardly anything he would deny them beside their freedom. Whatever their heart longs for is a small prize to pay for their company. The Emperor is absolutely whipped for his little bedmate and would do anything to keep them collared at his side.
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Assassin: You used to be something.... You could have lived a life similar to this without sacrificing your freedom if you had just taken his head. You are but a shell of the person I once knew. I despise you.
Cat Hybrid Reader: Hm... What you say might be true, but there's still something this life grants me that makes it all worth it
[Reader tears their shirt and knees on the floor closer to the cell as they shout]
Cat Hybrid Reader: Titus! Help!
Titus, storming down the dungeon stairwell: Oh, my precious angel. [Picks up Reader and checks them over for injuries] Don't worry, my love. I will have these awful, awful person executed at once. I'll have a necklace made from their ashes, but for now - will a massage and treats make do for leaving you all alone?
Cat Hybrid Reader, wiping fake tears from their eyes: yes....
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vaguely-concerned · 2 months
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the way the wire sets up these two opposing forces in garak's psyche that I think continue to wrestle it out in the background for the rest of the show -- on one side, his father-who-won't-even-acknowledge-that going 'I hope you keep living in shame and despair and desolate isolation for decades to come sport😜' (tain has basically gone 'be so kind as to create a hell of your own making and then stay in there for me, there's a good boy'. and garak has done that. oof. tain made him build a closet in his own head and locked him in it by doing nothing except make it clear he's not allowed to get out because he deserves to be in there. he never had to tell garak to do anything; that's what makes him special. I. am in shambles)
and then on the other side coming in with a steel chair, julian's soft steady voice going 'no one deserves this' and 'I don't want to hurt you' and 'I'll help you through it'.
one side that not only utterly abandoned him to his own misery but engineered it in the first place to control him, and one side that boldly, brazenly, doggedly refuses to abandon him, both on principle and out of personal care, no matter what garak says or does through the episode to try to throw him off. (and accepting the personal care aspect seems to part of bashir's journey of the episode; he has to admit to himself that yeah they are friends at this point. he is not personally watching over this guy while he sleeps like a lanky dweeb guardian angel for purely professional reasons lol thank you for calling his fucking bluff jadzia.) tain and bashir are basically having a quiet faux-affable battle for garak's soul at the end of that ep and while it starts small, down the road it eventually becomes clear julian won. tain gambles that his own influence will always triumph in the long run (he got there first, after all), and he's wrong.
all of this is presumably also why garak writes a stitch in time specifically to julian (aside from all the normal gay reasons) -- at the end of that he all but says that it's partly because he knows in such a deep way that julian would never judge him as harshly as he judges himself. the kindest voice in garak's inner world is julian bashir, that's how deeply he's internalized it. what the fuck. that's one of the most beautiful ways of touching someone's life I can imagine I feel nauseous and disoriented adn I need to go lie down for a while
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uvobreakmylegs · 4 months
Text
Lamp of the Body
first part of a fic long in the making based on some stuff @hypnoswrites and I were discussing about Chrollo :D
Chrollo x female!reader
Part 2
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Warnings: mentions of accidents, injury, isolation, mentions of strangulation
Word count: 6.3k
You were struggling to breathe.
You couldn't see anything.
Your heart was pounding hard against the inside of your chest.
You were scared.
Scared of what? You weren't sure. All you knew was that the adrenaline was rushing through your system while you panicked. And what furthered that panic was the fact that you couldn't move. You were stuck, laying on your back and frozen in place while all of your senses told you that you were in danger.
Then you noticed the figure sitting next to you.
It was too dark to make them out, but you saw their general shape and the way they leaned over you.
Once they realized that you had seen them, they moved.
A hand reached out, turning your face towards them before caressing your cheek in slow motions. An act that should have been comforting, but instead the panic in you worsened and you began to cry.
The figure did nothing to comfort you; they only wiped away the tears that fell. Despite that action that to most would have indicated some amount of care, you didn't feel anything like that when their skin brushed against yours.
They didn't care.
In such a vulnerable state, you were at the mercy of such a person, one who had no concern over your distress.
As if you were simply a spectacle to them.
They wiped away another tear in a robotic manner, and still said nothing when those tears continued.
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It didn't seem real.
That was your first thought when you woke up in the morning, your eyes going over details in the bedroom: the thin bits of light showing through the cracks in the blinds, the soft rug that lay on the floor that you had picked out when you'd first moved here, and the door to the walk-in closet that was currently closed. If it had been open you would've seen both your own and Chrollo's clothes hanging inside of it.
At the thought of Chrollo, you looked to the other side of the bed, finding that your boyfriend was still there beside you. You took in the sight of his face, how peaceful his expression was and the way his bangs partially covered the tattoo on his forehead, only allowing little bits of the design to be seen through the black locks. It looked as though he was still fast asleep based on the way his eyes remained closed and how steadily his chest rose and fell with each breath. As much as you felt compelled to scoot over closer and cuddle up against him, in the past your boyfriend had proven to be an incredibly light sleeper and you worried that the action might wake him up.
With all that Chrollo had done for you, the man deserved to get as much sleep as he wanted.
As quietly as you could, you got out of bed and made your way over to the bathroom, periodically looking back over to Chrollo and finding him to still be asleep each time you did. But as you looked back at him one last time before entering the bathroom, you were once again struck by how it still didn't feel completely real, that you were able to look at the image of your sleeping boyfriend.
That you were able to look at anything at all.
The lights came on when you flipped the switch, and instinct had you closing your eyes as they adjusted to the light. When it no longer hurt to have your eyes open, you made your way over to the sink, covering your mouth to yawn before you looked at yourself in the mirror. The gray eyes of your reflection stared back at you, briefly flitting about as you took in the messy state of your hair and wrinkled sleep clothes before you went back to staring at your eyes.
Maybe some might find it weird to be referring to them as being “yours” considering that they were definitely not the eyes you'd been born with and had come from an unknown donor, but seeing that they'd been placed inside your skull, it seemed silly to say otherwise.
Still, to think that just a few months ago you hadn't been able to see at all, your original eyes permanently damaged because of that car accident.
You'd lived that way for almost a year, and after getting used to the world being in total darkness with only the images in your memory to go off of, it didn't seem real that you were able to see again.
You brought a hand up to your cheek, watching as your reflection did the same and lightly brush beneath the area under and around your eye, your fingers briefly lingering on the small bits of scarring on your skin.
It didn't seem real, but clearly it was.
“Is everything alright?”
Hearing Chrollo's voice surprised you, and you looked over to find him entering the bathroom, smiling at you when you made eye contact.
“Yeah, I'm fine,” you answered, adding “sorry, I didn't mean to wake you.”
“You didn't,” he said, “I woke up on my own a moment ago.”
You were about to reply when another yawn came on that you couldn't suppress, and you covered your mouth with your hand.
His eyebrow raised as he asked “are you sure you don't need more sleep?”
“I'm fine,” you said, “I don't think I'd be able to sleep anymore, anyway.”
He nodded.
Then Chrollo walked up behind you, wrapping his arms around your form and holding you close to him. You reached up and grabbed at one of his hands, to which he responded by taking your hand in his and lightly squeezing.
“You came in to admire yourself, I see,” he said.
You laughed a little.
“Don't know if there's much to admire here at the moment,” you answered.
“I disagree,” he said, “there's quite a lot to admire about you.”
“Well, you're biased, so I don't know how much I can trust you on that,” you said.
He chuckled, taking the hand that he held and lifting it so he could place a kiss on your skin. As he did that your gaze went back to the mirror.
It was a nice image, you thought to yourself. You and your boyfriend, both of you with hair that needed to be brushed and looking rather disheveled after getting out of bed, standing together and holding one another in a moment of peaceful quiet.
A definite contrast to what life had been during the last nine months where the days had been filled with anxiety despite how hard you tried to adjust to a new way of living. Unsurprisingly, having one of your senses be unexpectedly taken away was a difficult thing to cope with.
Despite what had happened, you spent a relatively short amount of time in the hospital as Chrollo had been insistent on you returning home with him as soon as possible. You hadn't minded that too much. Even though you hadn't stayed there long, the loss of your eyesight had made your other senses get stronger. As such, you'd grown to truly hate the smell of hospitals, the feeling of needles poking into your skin and the never-ending beeping of the machines you'd be hooked up to.
Being in the comfort of your home while you recovered was preferable.
And hopefully it would be a while before you needed to go back for any doctor's appointment, though when you did, the staff at the hospital would definitely be surprised to find that you were able to see again.
Chrollo seemed to notice that your thoughts had drifted elsewhere as he asked “what is it, love?”
“Nothing too important, I guess,” you said, “just thinking about what'll happen if I ever end up back at that hospital. They'd be surprised if they saw me with how adamant they were that there wasn't anything that could be done for me.”
You looked back at him while asking “why wouldn't they have mentioned the guy in Padokea?”
“I don't know,” he answered, shrugging as he added “perhaps they were worried what might happen if they recommended an experimental surgery and then something went wrong.”
“What do you think could've gone wrong?”
“I'm sure there's a number of things, though I can't say what exactly they might be.”
“I thought you knew everything,” you said teasingly.
He smiled as he answered “I'm afraid I must concede that I only have a basic knowledge when it comes to the world of modern medicine. That's why I usually go to Machi if I have any questions.”
You hummed, looking back to the reflections in the mirror.
You could lose that. In a mere moment your eyesight could be taken away and your world would become dark again.
Remembering the way things had been caused the anxiety to swell inside of you, and this time you voiced your concerns.
“Things will stay this way, right?” you asked him, “nothing's going to happen where the eyes won't work out and I'll need to go back to not being able to see, right?”
Chrollo's hand went to rest on your shoulder and squeezed it reassuringly as he asked “is that what you're worried about?”
You nodded.
“It'd be sad to get back my eyesight and then have it taken away again,” you added.
Chrollo pulled you around so you were no longer facing the mirror. Then he leaned down and pressed a kiss against your lips before holding you against himself.
He spoke again.
“Everything will be fine, love,” he told you, “nothing's gone wrong since we came back, and if we were to call up that professional, he'd tell you that everything is fine.”
“You're sure he'd say that?” you asked.
“I'm sure.”
His hand was on your head stroking your hair. That alone was able to quell the anxiety that had begun to grow in your chest.
“After all,” he continued, “I promised that you'd be fine, didn't I?”
You nodded, remembering what he said to you almost a year ago.
You still remembered the way he'd grasped your hand and the feel of the fur that lined the cuffs of his coat sleeves brushing against your skin. You remembered the cast that your leg had been trapped in and the constant beeping of the monitors beside your bed. You remembered the darkness.
And you remembered how easily your spirits were lifted when Chrollo spoke to you.
“Everything will be fine, love. I promise you.”
At the time you thought he was only saying that so you would feel a bit better about your situation, that he was simply doing his best to be a supportive boyfriend as he navigated through the results of this accident with you. While the future may not have been completely bleak, it was without a doubt going to be different than what you could have ever imagined and you and Chrollo were going to need to find a new version of your “normal”.
At the time you never would have thought he'd find a way to make things go back to the way they'd been before the accident.
Yet he had.
And now you were here.
Still not completely recovered as the trauma that had come with being in such a nasty accident remained with you and would likely stay with you for a long time to come, but you were still in a much better place than you had been in the previous months.
And Chrollo had been by your side every step of the way.
He pulled away, cupping your cheek and moving your head up to look at him.
“Feeling better?” he asked.
You nodded.
“Yeah,” you answered, smiling after.
He kissed you again before saying “we may as well start getting ready for the day.”
He let you go after that, moving over to his side of the sink.
“Are you working today?” you asked.
“No, not today. My schedule is free.”
“Do we have anything planned?”
“Nothing in particular,” he answered, “although I suppose I should figure out something fast, otherwise you'll be insistent on watching horror movies all day.”
You pouted a little as you asked “what's wrong with that?”
“Ordinarily there would be nothing wrong with that. Unfortunately, you never seem to be able to pick any good movies,” he replied.
“Rude.”
“It's the truth, love.”
“Even if it is, you aren't supposed to say that.”
“So I'm supposed to lie to you?”
“When it comes to my taste in movies, yeah.”
“Interesting.”
There wasn't any malice behind either of your words during that bit of banter, and you couldn't help giggling a little bit after. Chrollo also had a soft smile on his face, though the somewhat distant gaze his gray eyes made it seem as though he was thinking about something.
His eyes…
… Huh. You hadn't really thought about it before.
“We almost match now,” you said.
“Hm?”
He glanced over to you, waiting for you to elaborate.
“Our eyes,” you explained, pointing to your own as you continued with “we almost have the same eye color now. It's off by just a few shades.”
Chrollo's hummed as he smiled again.
“So we do.”
Was that a dumb thing to point out? If it was he wouldn't say anything like that. And with the amount of time the two of you had been together, he was probably used to hearing such things from you. How a man like him wanted to be with someone like you, you would never know. But after the events of the past few months, you could say with one hundred percent certainty that he deeply cared about you.
Really, you didn't deserve him.
“I'll do whatever you want to do today, Chrollo,” you said, smiling at him again.
He smiled back at you as he said “I'll need to make sure I come up with something good, then.”
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The accident happened when Chrollo was away on business, during one of his trips that he took every few months that lasted up to a few weeks on average. You never quite knew what those trips were about; Chrollo said he couldn't tell you and communication with him during those times was shoddy at best, so you didn't even have much to go off of to figure out on your own what he was doing. There was a constant curiosity burning in you about what he was doing exactly, but since he told you that you didn't need to know, you stopped pressing the issue.
If Chrollo said so, then you trusted him.
Not that your trust helped at all in how lonely those weeks would be while he was gone. With communication being almost non-existent while he was away and no one else around to hang out with or even really talk to, the feeling of isolation would take over fast. For that reason, you figured that things would be more interesting if you were to step out of your routine. That day you headed out to attend a convention that was taking place not too far from where you lived in the hopes you could browse around, perhaps make a few new friends, but mostly to do something different.
When you were on your way was when a careless driver slammed headfirst into the taxi you'd been riding in.
Your leg and collarbone had both been broken, and one of your wrists and a few of your ribs had been fractured. Terrible injuries, to be sure, but those were things that you could recover from.
The loss of your eyesight was a different story, and the doctor who'd treated your injuries had informed you that there was no way to bring that back.
Hearing that had been hard.
It was made harder still when your attempts to reach Chrollo failed.
Even after giving them his number, the hospital had been unable to contact Chrollo as every single call they made failed to go through. With you stuck in bed with all of your injuries and not having anyone else you could contact, it was a devastating few days.
But on the afternoon of your third day in the hospital he showed up unexpectedly, heading straight to your room and calling out to you once he saw you. Relief filled you in the moment where you heard his voice, but the gravity of the situation brought you back down not long after. His hands grasped yours, and you felt the fur that lined the cuffs of his coat brush against your skin as you tearfully told him that you couldn't see anymore.
It seemed to take him a moment to process that information as he remained silent at first.
After a few moments, he pulled your hand up to his mouth and placed a kiss to your skin.
And then he spoke again.
“Everything will be fine, love. I promise you.”
The words had been spoken with conviction.
And he was right.
Everything had seemingly gone back to the way it was before, and that fact in of itself was better than you could've hoped for.
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It was hard to breathe, and you could feel the adrenaline pumping through you while you lay frozen in place. You couldn't move. No matter how many times your brain ordered your limbs to break free of their state of stasis, they wouldn't comply, and you were stuck, laying as though rigor mortis had set in.
The figure was there. Though you still couldn't see them clearly, you felt them watching you.
Why wouldn't they help you? Why did they only ever watch?
Your jaw refused to open so you could ask those questions, and you were left to harshly breathe through your nose while the figure continued to observe you.
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The next morning, while you fought with the eggs that didn't want to be unstuck from the pan, a thought came to you.
“What sort of things does Kortopi like?” you asked, looking back to where Chrollo sat at the table.
“Kortopi? He likes books. He also enjoys making miniatures.”
“Miniatures?”
“Those sets you can get from hobby stores,” Chrollo clarified before adding, “what makes you ask?”
You turned back to the pan as you answered “I wanted to do something for him since he helped us out. I thought maybe I could get him something nice; like I could put together a basket of stuff he'd like as a way to say 'thank you'. Same with Pakunoda and Machi.”
You paused before adding “and Shalnark.”
“Why the hesitation in naming Shalnark?”
Of course he picked up on that.
“… I don't want to say anything bad about your friend,” you replied.
You glanced back to find that his eyebrow had raised slightly.
“Oh? What did he do?”
You were hesitant to answer, because while Shalnark had been rather intrusive when he'd been here with you, he had been helping you and Chrollo out. Still, you knew from past experiences that Chrollo wasn't going to let this go.
“…. Some of the questions he asked me were a little invasive,” you admitted, “and I think he might have been going through our stuff.”
Chrollo didn't seem surprised.
“Shalnark does have a bad habit of being a bit too nosy,” he said, “but I doubt he meant any actual harm in anything he said or did.”
“Why didn't you bring this up back then?” he then asked.
“He was doing us a favor,” you said, “and you said that I could trust him. Just… Maybe if he ever comes back, we should make sure you're around to keep him in line.”
You heard him let out a chuckle as you went back to your cooking.
“He usually listens to me, so that shouldn't be an issue,” Chrollo said, “and if you'd like, I can take care of getting him something.”
“Nah, I'll still get him a gift as thanks. It'd be rude if I didn't,” you said, “hopefully I won't need him or any of your other friends to babysit me again.”
The eggs managed to not be burned when you pushed them out of the pan and onto your plate, and after months of being out of practice when it came to cooking, it felt good that you'd managed to do that much.
“I still don't think you needed to call on them as much as you did,” you added, “I would've been fine on my own for a few hours those times you were gone.”
“It was better for you to have not needed them than be in a situation where you were having an emergency and couldn't get help,” he answered.
“I'm not sure how much trouble I could've gotten into on my own, honestly,” you said.
“You never know.”
“I guess. I feel bad for taking up their time like that, though.”
“They were happy to help,” he told you, “but I do think your idea of gifts as a way of thanking them is a good one.”
Setting the plate of eggs down at the table, you sat down as you asked “where are you heading out today?”
He was already dressed to go out, and he'd finished up his coffee just as you took your seat.
“Nowhere special. I just need to take care of a few things in relation to my last job,” he answered.
“How long will you be out?”
“Not long. I should be back after lunch.”
“So not long enough that I need someone to look after me,” you said.
He smiled as he said “not this time, no.”
A beat of silence passed, and though you suspected you knew what his response would be, you decided to make a request anyway.
“If I finish this really fast, can I come with you?” you asked.
Though his smile didn't falter, Chrollo shook his head.
“It's not the sort of trip where I can bring you along,” he said.
“Not even if I stay in the car while you go do whatever?”
“Do you really want to be stuck in a car for hours?”
“No,” you admitted, “but it'd be nice to get out for a little bit.”
He nodded while reaching over so he could grasp your hand.
“I know that you're feeling closed off from the rest of the world, love,” Chrollo said, “but I'd much rather you stay in here while you continue your recovery.”
“I feel fine, though. Better than I have in a while,” you replied, “I could start going out a little, right?”
“Perhaps. But not on a trip like this.”
“What then?”
“We can figure that out when I get back.”
He stood up then, and there was a sense of finality in the conversation as he pushed his chair back in place, though he kept his cheerful demeanor when he smiled at you again.
“No need to get up,” he said to you, “I'll see myself out. Don't stress yourself and stay inside.”
That last part was definitely tacked on because of what you'd said.
“Even if I feel fine?” you asked.
“Do it for me, love.”
He finished that off by placing a kiss to your forehead.
Well damn. How could you refuse when he asked you like that?
He smiled at you, and you smiled back at him. Everything was fine.
You were fine when he walked out of the room, gathering his things before making his way to the door. You were fine even when you heard the jingling of his keys and the sound of the door opening. You were fine when you called out one last “goodbye”, to which he responded in kind.
But the instant you heard the front door lock behind him and you could no longer hear his footsteps, your mood fell.
Life got lonely when Chrollo wasn't around. Largely due to how small your world had become as you were lacking when it came to other people you could be around. And while the accident had made things smaller, it had been getting to be that way even before the crash. Friends and family didn't contact you anymore and you didn't know anyone outside of Chrollo's social circle, of whom you very rarely saw. The most time you had spent with anyone aside from your boyfriend was a few hours at a time during those months of recovery when he got his friends to look after you when you were bedridden.
Did your old friends or any of your family even know about the crash?
You had no clue, but since Chrollo said you didn't need to worry about them, you didn't think about them most days.
Though it didn't help how the apartment felt incredibly empty whenever he was gone.
But it was okay.
It would be fine, you told yourself as you finished up your breakfast. Chrollo wouldn't be gone long. His lack of packing an overnight bag or getting one of his friends to stay with you was proof of that. He'd be back before the day was out and everything would be fine.
Everything would be fine as long as Chrollo was with you.
After all, he'd said so.You had your eyesight back.
Though it had taken a while to get to that point. Months of staying put in bed so as to not strain yourself, and then getting used to walking on your own again after your broken bones had healed up. Despite having no vision, muscle memory had kicked in when you were feeling well enough to walk without assistance, and you didn't have much issue navigating the layout of the apartment once your leg had fully healed.
That was when Chrollo came to you with a proposal.
The medical professionals told you there was nothing that could be done about your sight, yet Chrollo had found a way around it, telling you of an experimental new surgery being done somewhere within the Dentora Region of Padokea. Under normal circumstances, you might have been skeptical, and just hearing the word “experimental” made you nervous. But Chrollo managed to convince you to give it a shot. All it took was a single conversation and he had gotten you to agree.
You were glad that he did, otherwise you might not be here like this right now. Back to what your normal had been before the accident, at least for the most part. Being able to be on your own and not needing to worry if you were becoming a burden to your boyfriend. Going back to waiting for him to return from his work and eagerly greeting him when he walked in the door.
Chrollo had done a good job of keeping up a positive attitude while you recovered, but now you were feeling better mentally, his happiness seemed a bit more genuine.
Maybe at some point soon, you could start to go out again like you had before the accident.
That would be something to discuss once he was back.
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You woke up in a cold sweat, breathing hard as you sat up in bed, your arms shaking as you struggled to support yourself.
Another nightmare. The same as the others where you couldn't move and someone sat by and stared at you. But this time had been different.
You could still feel their hands around your throat as your air was cut off completely.
A quick check by placing one of your hands to your neck confirmed that it had been a dream; no one was trying to choke the life out of you.
That only brought minimal relief, however. Even if it was only a nightmare, the images were still fresh in your mind, and it had left you shaken. The thought of being unable to fight back or even cry out while someone sat on top of you and tried to kill you was one that made you feel incredibly helpless.
And you were so, so tired of feeling helpless.
Glancing next to you, you were able to make out Chrollo's form on the bed. He was still asleep, otherwise he no doubt would've asked you what was wrong.
Maybe you should tell him.
They'd started weeks after getting back from Padokea, and the first few times you hadn't thought much of them. And even when they continued, you decided to keep it to yourself. They were simply been the result of stress, likely in relation to the accident, and that at some point they would stop on their own. You didn't want to bring it up because you didn't want to saddle him with anymore of your issues. After all, you weren't a child and Chrollo deserved better than for you to go crying to him whenever something mildly inconvenient happened.
If the nightmares had stopped quickly you wouldn't have considered talking to him.
But if anything, they were only increasing in frequency. Not only were they leaving you emotionally exhausted, but you felt that you were being drained physically as well. Your nights were becoming restless and you spent almost all of the next day tired as you tried to recuperate.
No wonder Chrollo didn't want you going out; he could easily see that you were tired and took that to mean that you still weren't well enough for the outside.
It still seemed strange that they would continue as long as they did, though. Especially when you were considerably less stressed than you'd been before the surgery. Why were they happening when things were going well?
… You didn't know. You just wanted them to stop so you wouldn't need to deal with them anymore.
For now just rest, you told yourself.
With that, you settled back down onto the bed, though your gaze went to Chrollo, still asleep and with his back turned to you. After a moment, you scooted over to be closer to him, resting against his back and placing a hand on his arm. Chrollo didn't wake.
A little unusual given how often he awoke to even the slightest of movement on the bed. He must have been more tired than usual. Part of you was sad because of that; it would've been nice to feel him hold you back, to give you some form of reassurance, even if it was one small piece of physical affection.
But waking him up would be selfish.
So you stayed still, not moving any further, keeping your hand on his arm and your face against his back while you took in his scent.
You can deal with this much on your own, you told yourself.
Just rest for now.
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“How would you feel about moving?”
You looked up from where you sat on the couch over to where Chrollo stood on the other end of the room. Moments ago you'd both been reading separately, and he'd gotten up when his cellphone had gone off so he could take the call in another room. He had just come back in and that was the first thing he said, and it managed to catch you so off-guard that it took you a bit to process what he just said.
“Moving?” you repeated.
“Yes.”
“And go where?”
“Out of the city,” he said, “somewhere in the country. That would be nice, wouldn't it?”
“…. Huh.”
He seemed surprised at your reaction, as he asked “you don't want to?”
“I don't know,” you said, “I was really looking forward to walking around here again when it's okay for me to go out.”
Shutting your book and placing it to the side, you asked “where exactly are you thinking?”
“Somewhere near the mountains would be nice.”
“…. Wouldn't somewhere near the mountains be several hours away from here?”
“It would.”
“Won't that interfere with your job?”
He shrugged.
“Relocating won't effect me much,” he said, “my work already requires me to travel. Adding a few more hours to my trips is hardly a sacrifice.”
“Besides,” he added, “I think a new environment would be better for you, especially one that kept you away from the stresses outside here.”
That made sense. Everything he said made sense, as it always did.
But still.
“I really like it here, though,” you said, “there are specific places I haven't been to since the accident that I want to visit again, and I won't be able to do that if we move. Not easily, at least.”
“I understand, but you shouldn't be sacrificing your health just to see certain places again.”
“I'm not sacrificing anything.”
At that, Chrollo leaned against the door frame before he sighed.
“You haven't been doing well, love,” he told you.
You frowned.
“I thought I was doing pretty good, all things considered,” you said.
“You spend most of your days exhausted.”
“I'm not that exhausted.”
To that, Chrollo gave you a pointed look. One that clearly told you that he didn't believe you and you knew you couldn't continue to insist that he was wrong.
“Okay, maybe I'm not doing as great as I'd like, but I'm still getting used to things. It doesn't mean we need to completely leave the lives we have here,” you insisted.
Should you mention the nightmares, that those were probably part of the issue? No…. He might use those as another reason as to why what he was suggesting was the correct decision, and therefore, the decision that you needed to go with. Like most things when it came to your life.
Not that there were any bad decisions that Chrollo had forced on you, but you generally had little input on them as he expected you to go with what he wanted. Like the eyes. He had basically told you that it was happening and you had been in such a depressive state that you didn't offer much resistance.
But it was different now. You liked it here and you wanted to stay. Plus he'd had this place even before meeting you, and the thought of forcing him to move out of his longtime home made you feel guilty. Even if he was the one who wanted it.
“Moving somewhere else just feels like a really extreme reaction,” you continued.
“Trying to keep your health in mind is extreme?” he asked.
“…. Maybe just a little bit, this time.”
Your voice was a bit more hushed when you answered.
After a moment, he pushed himself off the door frame and began to walk towards where you sat.
Chrollo would get his way again. You could already tell: he was going to talk to you, explain all of the reasons as to why he was right and shoot down every argument you had until you were forced to agree that there was no point in doing it in anyway other than his. Then by the end of the week he'd have found some home away from here, if he didn't have his eye on something already, and you'd find yourself packing up everything before the end of the month.
You loved your boyfriend. You really did.
But you didn't want to leave your home.
Maybe you could find some sort of compromise, figure out something to say that would get him to back down temporarily.
So before he could speak, you asked “what if we just held off on that for a few months? Wait and see how I'm doing after a longer period and come back to the topic of moving?”
“It's been some time already and you haven't gotten better,” he countered.
Sitting down next to you, Chrollo reached out and took your hand in his.
“I understand why you don't want to leave,” he continued, “but we do need to consider what is best for you. And I think staying so close to where that crash happened is having a negative affect on you.”
Giving your hand a light squeeze, he asked “don't you agree?”
You surprised him again when you shook your head.
“I get what you're saying,” you then told him, “but I don't think I'm going to get anywhere if I keep running from my problems. Yeah, I'm tired, but I really want things to go back to how they were. I really want to move past what happened.”
“So I'd feel a lot better if I could at least try to tough it out for a little while longer,” you continued, adding “and maybe you're right, that a change in environment is better for me. So maybe in a few months, if we find that I'm still in the same place, we can look into leaving.”
You stayed quiet a moment before adding “if that sounds good to you.”
It didn't seem like he felt that way. Or did it? You couldn't quite read him at the moment, his expression rather stone-faced as he presumably thought over what you said.
At least he was taking your argument into consideration. At least that was something.
“Alright then, love.”
You sat up straighter when he said that and stayed quiet so he could continue with “we'll hold off on it and come back to this discussion at a later date. However, if it seems like you're getting worse, we will be looking into moving.”
You nodded.
He squeezed your hand again as he then asked “you will tell me if you aren't doing well, won't you?”
“Of course.”
Chrollo stared at you for a moment.
Then he finally conceded, pulling your hand up to his lips so he could kiss it.
You responded by placing a kiss on his cheek, which he couldn't help but smile at.
It wasn't good to lie to him. You knew that.
But you were going to get through your issues without bothering him.
You weren't going to burden him anymore.
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bkgml · 9 months
Text
puppy love !!
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1:16pm
kats 💕: come to supply closet
yn: ugh i want to so bad but kami pissed off aizawa and he’s put us on lockdown ☹️
kats 💕: are u fr
yn: im sorry can u wait like ten minutes for him to calm down pls
kats 💕: fine.
you tap your foot impatiently for the next five minutes while watching aizawas anger slightly fade away, slowly but surely.
taking a deep breath and standing from your seat, you begin to walk towards your irritable teacher. you can feel your friends eyes wide and gaping at you in shock.
“mr aizawa, could i use the restroom?” you ask, faking confidence.
he takes a deep inhale before looking at you like you are the most infuriating thing on his mind right now.
“must you?” he asks annoyed and you shuffle on your feet before nodding.
he sighs again, taking his eyes off you and resuming his attention on his computer screen.
you stand there confused for a full two minutes before he sighs and stares at you once more.
“…go??” he mutters, as if you should’ve already anticipated his answer and gotten out of his hair.
you thank him and rush down the hall, passing the girls washroom, and the class katsuki’s supposed to be in, before finally reaching the supply closet.
you check your surroundings before grinning at the absence of people in the barren hallway before entering the supply closet.
“hi.” you say, backing up against the door to shut it and holding your bottom lip between your teeth to suppress your smile.
your boyfriend looks up from his phone, frown turning into a smile of his own that’s reserved only for your eyes.
“took you long enough.” he says, feigning annoyance.
you giggle and play with your fingers while continuing to lean against the door.
“you know aizawa.” you defend.
he hums, taking slow steps towards you.
“yeah.” he says, looking at your lips.
“i do.” he mumbles, mostly to himself as he grabs you from your spot against the door and presses you against one of the many shelves holding various cleaning products.
you squeal as he does so before you feel his lips press to yours, filled with love and the excitement of a fresh relationship.
you continue giggling as he presses several kisses upon your waiting lips.
getting slightly fed up he moves to your cheek, giving you sloppy kisses on purpose to make you squirm.
“k-kats.” you heave between fits of giggles.
“you deserve it.” he says, licking his lips to make them almost disgustingly wet as he continues to kiss along your face.
“stop it tickles!” you gasp, attempting to push your boyfriend away.
“uh uh.” he mumbles and bites your nose.
“oh!” you squeal.
“you’re so- ugh! gross!!” you whine.
he finally ends his attack and you struggle to stand as you gasp from laughing too hard.
“oh my god, kats.” you pant.
he smiles at you, reaching down and tucking a strand of hair behind your ear before questioning you.
“what?” he asks gently. too gently for that post attack mode you’re in.
“you’re so annoying.” you frown, wiping his spit off your cheek.
he laughs softly, caging you in the shelves once more.
he lowers his head to your chest, resting there while you clean yourself off and smooth out your hair.
when you finish you sigh, dragging your fingers through his locks of hair.
he smiles softly.
“i missed you, you know.” he mumbles, not looking you in the eyes.
“yeah?” you ask, grinning.
he huffs, shoving your face away with his hand.
before you can retaliate you feel him place warm kisses up your neck, free of spit. while he makes his way up your face his hands make their way around your waist.
you hum, satisfied with this treatment and wait patiently until he makes it to your lips.
when he does, you smile as he pulls away to look into your eyes. then presses his lips to yours sweetly.
the two of you share soft kisses for another 15 minutes until you have to part ways.
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9:37pm
yn: can i sleep over tonight?? 🫶🏻
kats 💕: fuck yes get over here
yn: SPRINTING!!
katsuki heard a soft knock on his door before you come barrelling in, jumping on him while he lays in his bed and he catches you, scooping you up and plopping you on his lap.
“what was the point of even knocking if you didn’t let me get the door?” he asks.
“well i wanted to give you a warning, what if you were watching porn or something?” you smile, shoving your face in his neck and nuzzling.
“i knew you were coming over!” he groans.
“well what if you wanted to schedule in a quick wank before i got here?” you ask, giggling to yourself and pulling back to look at him.
he drags a hand over his face in annoyance.
“you’re so…” he trails off, huffing and removing his hand from his face.
“so…. kissable?” you ask before pecking his lips.
“hmm.” he faux ponders for a moment before grabbing your hips with strong hands and squeezing tightly.
“….yeah.” he decides, kissing you and letting your arms wrap around his neck in agreement.
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Note
Omfg I ate that Vox fic up! The one where he hypnotized the reader after a long fight of them nearly being taken from him. Can you do a part 2 please? Like when the reader eventually learns he basically forced them to sign the contract and they find a way to be immune to his hypnosis? He goes absolutely nuts despite literally owning their soul. He's canonically a control freak and seems to even have some yandere traits. I hope I'm not going against your rules! You don't have any posted so I just wanna ask! Thank you for being awesome! :D Don't hesitate to turn down this request. Write what makes you feel comfortable. Just please respond so I and everyone else knows not to make a similar request in the future. Lots of love!
ABSOLUTELY!! I did take this in a slightly different direction, but hope you enjoy it nonetheless! Lowkey thinking of doing a Vox POV of this later and maybe even a part three...
Vox isn't actually in this much, but I feel a loose actual plot coming together and this is what naturally flowed for me.
I hope y'all are ready for more angst... plus a cliff-hanger <3
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More Than Anything Part 2 [Vox x Reader]
Part 1
Part 2.5
"You controlling prick!"
Vox ducked as you threw a pillow at him. Even in your righteous anger, you'd never actually truly try to hurt him, but by god were you pissed.
Despite Vox's obvious disdain for the Hazbin Hotel and its association with Alastor, you visited the hotel occasionally to catch up with your friend Angel Dust and give some much-deserved love to his pet pig Fat Nuggets. It was during one of these visits that you ran into Alastor, who immediately looked at you with disgust in his ever-present smile.
"Really now, my dear," he said as he shook his head in disapproval. "It's already enough of a shame that you have such poor taste in a romantic partner, but to give your soul to him as well? I thought you were smarter than that."
The overlord could see the aura of Vox's ever-annoying electric cords locked around your soul like chains. You'd been confused and his eye twitched with annoyance as he realized what Vox had done to you. To say you were livid after he explained that you'd been tricked was an understatement.
"Y/N, I'm sorry," Vox pleaded as you fumed at him in his room. "But you left me no other choice! You weren't listening to me and if I didn't bind your soul, then Satan knows what could have happened to you by now."
"Just because you don't fucking believe in my ability to look out for myself doesn't mean you get to just take my soul!" You screamed with hot, angry tears flowing down your face. You wipe at them, only crying harder at the frustration of the tears you couldn't control in your anger. You felt like they undermined your emotions.
Vox's magic sparked around him as he tried his best not to get angry and start a fight with you. He was terrified and was that much more susceptible to his angry tendencies in moments like these. It took everything in him to try and calm himself, not wanting to push you away further. His heart dropped and his blood ran cold as he saw you pull a large bag out of the closet and start shoving clothes into it.
"W-Where are you going?" Vox panicked as he crossed the room.
"The hotel," you said with quiet fury, as you stepped away from the closet and went to the nightstand with your personal things on it. "I need some space and it's the one fucking place I know you'd rather die again than follow me to."
"Ŷ̸̪͕o̸̢̿̿ū̷̫ ̶̬͂c̶̺̾͂a̴͒͘͜n̴̫̂̔'̶̡̉t̶͙̝̄͒," Vox said, his voice starting to glitch as his panic increased. "You've heard the news, the extermination is in a week and the angels plan on attacking there first. There's no guarantee they'll keep to the date after how much little miss dumbass pissed off heaven. It's not safe there."
You pull your bag over your shoulder and the look you gave him will haunt him for the rest of his afterlife. "It's safer than here."
It breaks him all the more when you shield your eyes from him and storm past him so he can't hypnotize you into staying. Vox is paralyzed with fear like never before. He wanted to scream, to beg, to stop you from leaving him, but he couldn't do anything as his system glitched so hard it forced him into a reboot. When he came to, he was alone. You were gone.
--
Charlie was more than willing to let you stay at the hotel. The two of you hadn't had the chance to really ever speak before, but she was always friendly when you came to visit Angel, even after you explained to her there was no way you'd be able to become a guest.
In exchange, you were happy to help set up the defenses against the extermination. You got to know all of the other members of the hotel and the work helped you push down the burning ache in your chest.
Vox had been trying to contact you nonstop. You eventually turned off your phone, driven insane by the wall of notifications of him begging you to respond in any way. He knew you were okay for the time being. He was literally connected to your soul. But as the extermination day grew closer, his panic only increased. If it wasn't for Valentino and Velvette holding him back, there were several times he genuinely would have set aside his pride and come to the hotel just to get you.
It was after helping Husk and Cherri put up a particularly tricky barrier with the dwindling supplies that Angel found you taking a break. He passed you a water which you took gratefully as he slid down the wall and joined you on the floor.
"So," he started. "Are we going to ever talk about the reason why you're hiding out here?"
"Do we have to?" You groan, running your fingers through your hair. Despite the smiles and laughter you'd been sharing with your newfound friends as you all prepared for the potential end of it all, the dark circles on your eyes gave away what was lurking underneath.
For as angry as you were at Vox, you missed him. You missed feeling him curl against you in bed. You missed being woken up at unholy hours early in the morning because Vox couldn't start his day without giving you a kiss and telling you how much he loved you. You missed his shitty taste in shows and how he'd collapse into your arms after a long day at work.
Angel sighed, looking at the boarded-up lobby. "Look I may not get it, but you love the guy, right? Are you really content with possibly dying in a couple of days for a cause you're not even a part of, just because you're pissed with him?"
"He stole my soul, Angie" You frown at him.
"And that is fucked up as hell," he agrees. "But I know you and I know there ain't no way in hell you're actually satisfied leaving shit like this."
"I just-," you start before groaning. "How the hell are we supposed to come back from this? I doubt he'd ever void the contract. He's too convinced he's right for that."
Angel sighed, setting his own cup aside. "Honestly toots, you're not gonna like it, but... He kinda has a point."
You whip your head up to look at him and he holds up his hands defensively. "Not saying that stealing your soul was the right call. Believe me, if anyone gets how fucked it is having your soul controlled by a sociopath with a big ego, it's me. But you're not exactly in the safest of places, dollface. Not to mention, you're dating an overlord who's in a trio determined to piss off as many big shots as possible. His mind may not be in the right place, but his heart kinda is."
You take Angel's words to heart and sigh as you bury your face in your arms. "I hate it, but you're right... I just... I don't want to hold him back. I don't want to be the person that needs to be protected. I want to be his equal, not his problem."
"Then tell him that," Angel sighs. His gaze drifts to the bar and smiles fondly. "Someone recently has taught me how important being real with yourself is. It's okay to be flawed. No one got stuck in this shithole cause we were perfect, y'know?"
He nudged you with a grin as he added, "Plus, come on. Can you imagine how many bitches in hell would kill to have a sexy fucker that wants nothing more than to love ya and keep ya safe? I love you toots, but for fucks sake, pick a struggle."
You snort, shaking your head as you lightly swat at his arm. "Fuck you for being right about shit all the time."
"It's one of my best assets," Angel smirked. "Y'know, aside from all the fluff."
You laughed as he puffed up his chest and by the end of the evening, you'd decided to head back. As much as you loved Angel and wanted nothing more than to be by his side as the extermination drew near, he had a point. This wasn't your fight and there was a controlling dumbass that had been blowing up your phone ever since you left that was praying for your return.
After exchanging promises to see each other after the extermination, you left the hotel. You had an idiot to see.
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ssahotchnerr · 9 months
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I’m not sure if you’re still taking soft hotch requests but imagine hotch coming home late and you had fallen asleep on the couch waiting for him! Lots of cuddles and kisses because he accidentally wakes you up even though he’s trying not too
kisses at 3 am
WHY is this not my life cw; all fluff with a teeny touch of angst
boarding now. should be home around 3. see you soon, love you.
aaron's text caused your heart to skip a beat, a giddiness filling you from head to toe as butterflies erupted in your stomach. finally.
a case has kept him away from you, and notably the longest he's had in a while. you've been greatly spoiled recently, a case typically not lasting more than four days at a time. or they've even been somewhat local, allowing him to come home at night. but that was not the present scenario; aaron a few states away, and you haven't seen him in close to ten days.
with jack already asleep in his room down the hall, you curled up on the couch, set on staying up. you put a movie on to keep you company, and began counting down the minutes until you heard the familiar sound of aaron's key hitting the doorknob, announcing his arrival home and ultimately allowing you to throw yourself into his arms. and once you were in them, you didn't plan on letting go.
but as determined as you were, you vaguely could feel yourself nodding off. you had a long day at work, haven't been sleeping too soundly with aaron's absence, and you were exhausted. you put up a fight, urging and forcing your eyes to stay open despite the constant droop, needing to see aaron after being apart for far too long. but you sadly made the mistake of laying down, in search of a more comfortable position, so you succumbed to sleep involuntarily.
when aaron opened the door, at half past three, he was met with your sleeping form sprawled out on the couch, the ending credits of your (second) movie rolling on the screen illuminated in front of you.
a soft smile tugged at aaron's lips at the visual. the whole time he was away, all he could picture was coming home and seeing you. the texts throughout the day, the occasional late calls, made time away more manageable, but it was still painful. they made him feel like you were just within reach, that he could simply reach out and you'd be right there, that you could be in his arms and he could kiss you senseless. but the realization, or reality of the distance between, only produced a larger pit to form in his stomach.
it also filled him with a feeling he couldn't quite describe, having someone waiting for him to come home - someone eager to see him. after the divorce with haley, aaron felt like love was forever behind him - that he didn't deserve love somehow, anymore - but you've changed his perspective on everything. he was softer, lighter, more perceptive because of you. you've opened his eyes in more ways than he thought possible.
once the door was locked behind him, aaron placed his go-bag down besides the coat closet as quietly as he could manage. he then kicked off his shoes, removed both his suit jacket and tie, and placed them neatly on a nearby chair.
after, first, checking on jack - he grabbed the tv remote off the arm of the couch beside your head, clicking it off and submitting the room to darkness. he then carefully slid onto the couch next to you, wrapping an arm securely around your waist and scooting his body as close to yours as it possibly could be.
a wave of peace immediately rushed through his body at your contact, all the lingering stress he's felt the past few days disappearing in seconds. he buried his face into your neck, placing a soft kiss on the skin he found. he didn't stop there either, giving you multiple - on your neck, jaw, brushing his lips anywhere he could reach.
in result you stirred, your shoulders squaring as you stretched briefly as you began to awake. eyes still closed, your brows crumpled into small confusion at the sudden arousal, still overtaken by the deep depths of sleep.
"it's just me, sweetheart." aaron whispered, placing another chaste kiss on your neck. his head laid onto your shoulder, his hand rubbing your hip gently. "go back to sleep."
subconsciously, you recognized his voice; your body relaxing as you melted into him and back into the couch, a soft, content exhale escaping you as you began to reenter sleep.
and subconsciously needing to be closer, your body turned, positioning yourself so your back was to his front, burrowing back against him. again, aaron's face fell into the crook of your neck, his warm breath as he nestled against you. his hand slipped under your shirt to rest on your abdomen, the lull of his thumb brushing your skin guiding him to sleep not long after you.
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tinyavenuesailor · 1 year
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Crack Fic! Where Everyone thinks Merlin is the reasonable one.
Everyone loves Merlin and thinks he’s the sweetest person, who couldn’t hurt a fly. So, they’re all annoyed when they see how Arthur treats him. The King is constantly overloading his manservant with work, ordering him to do massive tasks and coming up with ridiculous excuses to keep Merlin from taking a break. So, the knights and others constantly try to find ways to pull Merlin away from Arthur’s side and give him a break but Arthur always finds a way to mess up their plans.
Gwen and the other maids sometimes try to help Merlin with his chores
Gwen: Arthur you can’t actually expect Merlin to clean the entire throne room by himself
Arthur: *shrugs* Yes. I’m hardly asking him much
Gwen: It usually takes five maids to thoroughly clean the throne room. It’s ridiculous to ask one person to do so much work and then, to place Lancelot as a guard to make sure none of us can help him. 
Arthur: Lancelot wouldn’t have to guard anything if you all weren’t so ready to disobey my orders. I said Merlin will clean the throne room ALONE and that is final
Gwen: I never knew you could be such a cruel person and to Merlin of all people
*Gwen storms off*
Gwaine, Leon, Percival, Elyan and some of the other knights try to steal Merlin away to the tavern to relax
Gwaine: Come on Princess. I’m sure you can survive one night without Merlin 
*Gwaine tries to pull Merlin to their side but Arthur grabs hold of Merlin and pulls him back*
Arthur: Need I remind you, Merlin is my manservant and doesn’t have time to play around. He still has very important duties to complete
Elyan: What could he possibly have to do at this time? Most servants have gone home for the day?
Arthur: Well Merlin is the King’s manservant as I keep reminding you and still have very important things to do
Gwaine: Like what?
Arthur: *pauses* For one, he needs to clean the mess he made in the closet
The knights: *trying to process the bullshit Arthur just told them* 
Arthur: *crossing his arms, 100% serious, daring them to challenge him*
Merlin: It’s fine guys really, probably next time *pulling Arthur and himself back into Arthur’s chambers and locking the door*
Or when something terrible happens to Merlin like the time he got kidnapped and everyone went into full panic
Arthur: *staring hard at Lance* Merlin’s been kidnapped?
Elyan: They ambushed us out of nowhere and before we knew it they were off with him.
Leon: Don’t worry sire, I’ll gather a search party immediately to have him found.
Gwaine: We’ll make them sorry they ever thought to mess with our Merlin
Arthur: *holding up a finger and turning to Lance again* Merlin’s been kidnapped?
Lance: ..... That is the story
Gwaine: Princess, have you not been listening. We need to hurry every second counts. 
Arthur: I heard, just wondering why he couldn’t have chosen a better day to get himself kidnapped
*Everyone gawks at Arthur in disbelief*
Basically, everyone thinks that Arthur doesn’t appreciate Merlin and that their cinnamon roll deserves better and formed a protection squad to help Merlin get the treatment he deserves.
Meanwhile in Reality....
Arthur knows about Merlin’s magic. He is fully aware of how powerful Merlin is and finally sees that his manservant isn’t an idiot. He’s just a bloody madman.
===In the throne room=== 
*Arthur and Merlin both staring at a dark purple swirling vortex on the floor*
Arthur: *takes a deep breath* Merlin, why is there a hole in my throne room?
Merlin: Well, it's not a hole. It’s a sort of gateway to the dark dimension.
Arthur: Oh, okay. Why is there a gateway to the dark dimension in my throne room?
Merlin: ..... I can fix it
Lancelot: Arthur, I heard you- *looks down at the menacing purple gateway on the floor and then back to Arthur and Merlin* 
Lancelot: Should I go guard the door?
===After Gwaine, Elyan and Percival tried to take Merlin out for drinks===
Merlin: You know we both could use a break. I am a bit hungry. Been a while since I had a drink too
Arthur: Well maybe, we can join them after you explain why my Uncle is tied up in my closet
*Arthur opens his closet doors revealing a tied-up and gagged Agravaine making muffled noise*
Merlin: You told me to get evidence that he was working with Morgana
Arthur: And your solution to that was to kidnap him?
Merlin: What better way to hear it than from the man himself? 
Arthur: What’s going to happen when people realize he’s missing
Merlin: Don’t worry, one memory wipe spell and he’ll be back tomorrow in his chambers like nothing ever happened
Arthur: You told me those spells were dangerous
Merlin: *laughs* Well, yeah, I’m not using it on us
Agravaine: *making muffled and panicked pleads to Arthur*
Lancelot: Sorry, Arthur, Gaius told me that Merlin needed m- *sees a tied-up Agravaine* 
Lancelot: *nods* I’ll go stand guard
=== Arthur, the first to find Merlin after his “kidnapping” ===
Arthur: *folds his arms and looks behind his manservant to see a trail of bodies* Kidnapped?
Merlin: Well they did try to kidnap me. I just decided not to resist. 
Arthur: *sighs* Is everyone dead?
Merlin: I was supposed to leave someone alive?
Arthur: *rolls his eyes* Come before I have to explain how my “innocent”, “weak” manservant took out a group of mercenaries.
Lancelot: *already standing guard* 
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