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#guess i gotta read em at some point
kabutoraiger · 1 year
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these posts paralleling iwtv show with quotes from the books keep making me go “oh so anne rice could WRITE write, huh 😯” very sad that pop culture failed me on that fact up til now
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daddyplasmius · 1 year
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okay, so, I've collected a bunch of DP fandom stuff that I remember off the top of my head, specifically in chronological order & colour coded here in this post (fics/comics, tumblr posts, important imo) for no reason other than I saw a post asking for Phandom history & it triggered my biggest, most long-running hyperfixation & now I'm curious if anyone else remembers stuff.
this link is going to be the permanent version I will be updating, but I'm posting what I currently have (gonna go through my old laptop later for more) just to let people know. you can also find the link on my blog, but only on desktop. It isn't colour coded there, sorry.
please share more if you got anything else cuz I'm 100% sure I'm missing a lot of stuff & am too interested now. the biggest reason a lot of stuff isn't here is that I simply can't find it. second biggest reason is i forgor. things not included here aren't "unimportant," this is just the first stuff that comes to mind.
putting it under a cut 'cause it got kinda long
Mars by JadeRabbyt (2005)
Checkmate by pearl84 (2006)
Conversations of a Ghost Gabber by Cordria (2006)
The Foley Maneuver by bluemoonalto (2007)
One Thousand Years by Nylah (2008)
Lab Rat by AnneriaWings (2009)
Lost by Cordria (2010?) [1] [2] [3] [4] [5]
Phantom of Truth by Haiju (2011)
Ghost Deaths (2012)
Through Coals and Rain by Kakawot (2012)
Shadow of a Doubt by Haiju (2013)
Pink Pants (2013?)
Wes (2014) [original] [1] [2] [3] [4]
this "I'm Inevitable" gif (2014)
Space AU (2014)
Treading Water by The Full Catastrophe (2014)
Danny, you dead IDIOT!! comic (2014)
wash away the darkest days by anthrop (2014)
Reverse Trio (2014)
Inverse Trio (2014-2016) ALT
Halfas are "feral children" (2015)
Burn the Streets, Burn the Cars by anthrop (2015)
It's Not Gay if He's Dead by phantomrose96 (2015)
You Smell Like Death by starfleetrambo (2015)
Ghost Bird AU by @rest-in-peachs (2016?)
Things I Can(not) Do In Amity Park by RedHeadsRock1010 (2016)
KEtTLE by Cordria (2016)
Deeper, Darker by Silvermoonphantom (2016)
Danny Phantom Punches Butch Hartman In The Face by MistressVintage (2017)
Dannypocalypse (2017)
Ghost Train (2017?)
Ghost Physics by jayrockin (2017)
Ghost Infographics (2018)
The Taxonomy of Ghost Cores: An Observational Study (2018) Communicating with Ghosts Professionally: A Study (2018)
Species in Danny Phantom (2018?)
Diddles Piddles by diddly-darn-ghost (2018)
Broken Ectoplasm by ghostanimal (2019)
Ghost of Heroes by Enigmaris & ScarletNightFury (2019-2020)
do not stand at my grave and cry (i am not there, i did not die) by blueh (2020)
Undercover Phantom by artistfingers (2021)
Corruption is a Two Way Street by datawyrms (2021)
Things That Bleed by artistfingers, kkachis, & Perfectly_Inconspicuous (2022)
10,000 works on AO3 (2022)
Ghost Speak:
Danny's handwriting (2015?)
Cordria (2015)
Fiver-Rivers [1] [2] [3] (2019)
Rubber Chicken Sounds (2019)
#Danny Phantom#Phandom History Archive#do you even understand how hard it was to find the original Wes post????????#i spent like 2 hours on that alone#Wes Weston why are you so hard to find#just realizing that a lot of shit happened in 2014#like. 2014/2015 ish#i joined somewhere between 2014 & 2016 so i guess i literally came here right at the peak of phandom activity#the height of tumblr's paranormal activity. you might say#i think i'm just biased though#should i put my own fics on here. Phantom is pretty important to me being my first DP fic#& also the thing that got me back into writing#it's not very good but by god if i dont love it. & anyways i put Bird AU on here lol i think i can put Phantom up at some point. as a treat#also if any links are broken tell me cuz i'm not checking them again. it's 4am#reminder: gotta find those Bird AU fics i read & put em here. there ARE actual Bird AU fics. i know there are. i did not hallucinate that#it just might be the hardest thing on earth to do since that was years ago & i have no idea what they were called#anyway gonna add a fuckton of fics & (hopefully) tumblr posts when i go through my old laptop. i got everything bookmarked on there#like. so many fics. i had them organized too based on what kind of fic it was. but they all have stupid names cuz i was like 15#me: i should do my stencil art today. just to be a bit productive & also maybe make money#my brain: what if you organized Danny Phantom fandom posts into a big archive for people to look at? for free. until 4am.#me: you know what that sounds so much better let's do that
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Mercury in da HoUSe (s) mercury and why you think your smart - you only think your smart, you don't even know if you are because you can't think any other way. I dont care if people tell you your smart, they don't even know if they are smart because they have the same dilemma as you....... but if you think your dumb your probs right.... okay enough chit chat we gotta do some astrollogy >> Mercury in the first - These guys talk the talk, hella good at talking, talk too much, but at least they know how to talk. but it gives everyone in the rooom a headache. also there voices go a million directions... they like to put on voices. actually i hate your voice. its too earpiercing its like your looking at there voice even if you look away. how are you able to make me look at yo voice, its meant to be auditory but i can fucking see it STFUUUU Mercury in the second - I like money but not as much as this guy. this guy will think of every scam, every business every investment possible just to prove his worth (typically with money) as kids they are hustlers with money, everyone knows they gonna make coin, but typically as they get older, money don't mean shit to them and they start investing into something substantial and if they dont grow outta this mindset, they become shells of themselves like bill gates or the amazon guy. mercury in the third - okay these guys are actually smart, but its almost hard to tell. because there intelljgence isn't attached to anything beside intelligence itself. so its hard to notice, but they are very smart people. quick learners but i notice not quick thinkers, or at least they don't voice it much. which i guess makes them smart because they ploying liek dat mercury in the fourth - subtle intelligence, almost manipulative intelligence, they are the types to make you make a point jsut so they can point out the flaws in your point rather than make a argument themselves.... then make an argument once yours has been smashed to pieces. assholes honestly... but i rate it its just smart tactics but make em talk first and they speechless lmao mercury in the fifth - funny yes your funny, yes i see what you did there, oh yes this next joke is also funny because it ties in with your last joke.. did i mention your funnY? oh im not that funny, well im sorry i can't do it like you becayse yourr liek for real funny. okay can someone else speak now, this guys voice wasn't annoying but now it is. fr comedians but every comedian over do it, and so do they mercury in the sixth - annoying intelligence, always pointing out the flaws in whatever the fuck you just said. like dude im trying my best to think, to then speak it, and to respect you as a person. and your lookjing for flaws, in my speech? oh you can't help it? well i can't help but not wanna talk to you. annoyingly nitpicky with what i say you say she say, why so serious? oh your too smart? thats what every dumbass has ever said to me stfu. mercury in the seventh - always on your back, but can you get off my back, im still working on my argument i dont need you to suck me off about it jeezes. id rather you criticize me honestly. oh now your critical of me. well why can't you just think for yourself. oh you don't know how to. you only don't know how to because you just wanna learn more and more and more and more and more. and now you dont know how to think for yourself. congrats you played yoself mercury in the eighth - so mysterious wow so profound, i never saw it that way. no you just were thinking of something cool to say this whole time and you jsut thought of it. your only quiet so you dont look like a fool. insecure bitch ass. oh but now you just wanna insult me yeah thats because i called you out. honestly these guys are just looking for a deep chat, and its only deep because they were digging for so long.
mercury in the ninth - these guys know way too much bullshit. like they read a lot and just spit random facts and its hard to talk to them without feeling patronized. like yeah we get it, you read a lot. most peole don't because we like to be a human, not live in a book. go outside its nice. oh thats where you get your information > outside, books, the world is your dictionary - god you really are annoying. oh you knew that already. fuck off man.
mercury in the tenth - shrewd; always thinking and saying the best possible thing to say for each scenario, and its typically just sayings they read in hustler books, or what they dad said once. yeah your street smart, but no one else advertises it as much as you, which means you don't understand the streets as well as you think. yep thats right re-strategise; they just wanna own the streets i swear. and no one tries as hard as them. and thats saying something mercury in the eleventh - stop protesting you mong, you really think convincing us the realities of the world, will change the world? oh itll start the butterfly effect, okay true go on, tell us how eating veggies gonna stop the meat industry. oh you were just saying this crap for bants. yep that was annoying. oh now you wanna talk about how attitudes has shaped the world, dude why you always trying to integrate everysingle philsophy of the world into one conversation. you do realise its all bullshit? but everyone likes em because they invite everyone in on the conversation... hey someone gota do it Mercury in the twelfth - these guys are the worst i swear, cant be more manipulative than these lot, they will act innocent, but come at you aggressivly, and itll just confuse ya. youll think they just dumb and naive but they klnow damn well what da hell they doing. play yo game with someone else... oh you don't like to play with them because they fall for your shit, yep so you only like people who set you straight ehhhh you should just come at me straight or ill set you straight. oh you just struggle with convos well it shows.
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ddejavvu · 11 months
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james potter has lovely hair and it’s well known that the reader is fond of it. whether this is romantic or platonic poly marauders, or James x reader, it doesn’t matter much but
he decides to prank them by saying he’s planning on getting a buzzcut. genuinely devastating news, cus his hair is so lovely. i think sirius would be in tears, reader sat next to him but manages to say through he sobs that he’d look lovely with a buzz cus he’s so pretty that he could pull anything off. remus returns from his quick “gotta hide the electric razor” trip to yank softly on the back of sirius’ hair and tell him to stop being a baby, cus it’s just hair (even though him and reader are blubbering in solidarity, reader at least tries to be supportive, but sirius treats it like a first degree felony)
idk if he’d tell em it’s a prank so quickly if perhaps (I’d do this I’d do this id do this) reader gets all touchy and just has to bury her face at the top of James head for a bit of a mourning period.
sirius switches tactics and says that no one will have anything to hold onto if he buzzes (not true)(james is fuckin massive)(I’ll hold onto his bicep by my teeth if I have to). if they’re not together atp i could see James being like fine 🙄🙄 guess someone’s gonna have to show me what I’d be missing 🙄🙄 quick, im changing my mind 🙄🙄 (little shit)
nsfw under cut // minors dni.
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sirius would definitely throw a fit without trying to be nice to james, like a full on kicking screaming begging no prongs don't do it!!! i'll throw myself off the roof if you do!!
and yes ur trying to be so polite about it, respect his say in what he does with his own body, but you're sooo sad :( there's little tears gathering in your eyes and james is this close to confessing it was all just a tease to get you to stop crying but remus rushes off to the bathroom to 'wash his hands' (read: hide the razor like you mentioned) so he waits until he's back first, but the antics just continue and he never wants to stop getting doted on!!
he's hugging sirius like don't worry pads! it'll grow back eventually. and sirius is like NO. NO YOU CAN'T. PLEASE.
then you ask for just a bit of time alone with his hair. so you get up onto your knees beside him on the bed and drape yourself all over his head (subsequently putting your boobs in his face) and he's like hehe :] yeah say goodbye to the curls baby :]
remus honestly is just sitting there with his head in his hands i think. just. mourning in private. doesn't wanna bother james but is deeply devastated. so he's not quick enough to catch sirius launching his next attack, which consists of 'what are we gonna yank on during sex, prongs?' and remus pops his head up like. yeah this could work.
"S'true," Remus pretends to deliberate, throwing a pointed look at James, "'Can't tug on those pretty curls if you chop 'em off, Prongs."
with your boobs in his face and now both of his boyfriends talking about yanking on his hair, he's.. coming around. he's definitely not telling you it's a prank now, he just goes right for the belt buckle like 'alright boys, interesting point. i'll need some research to make my final decision.'
you best believe that's the best fuck james has ever had and will ever have, and sirius is generous with his silent treatment after he finds out it was just a prank, too, only ignores him for three days instead of a week <3
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estrellami-1 · 6 months
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If I Should Stay
Just a friendly reminder that I missed the last post so I’m posting part 26 and part 27 on the same day, so make sure to go back and read 26 if you haven’t already! ❤️
Part 1 | . . . | Part 26 | Part 27 | Part 28
Eddie doesn’t laugh the way Steve thinks he would. Instead, he frowns slightly. “Should be careful,” he mumbles. “Some dealers don’t care what they give you, long as they get their money.”
Steve hums in response. “Well, I won’t have to worry about that now, right?” He shifts on the roof, laying down to look up at the stars. Feels, more than sees, Eddie do the same. “You’re staying.”
“That I am,” Eddie replies, sighing as he looks at the stars. “Wish we could see ‘em all.”
Steve glances over, and Eddie lifts a hand, waves it lazily at the sky. “The stars. Can’t see but half of ‘em cause of all the lights. But they’re so pretty. So bright. Almost enough to make me want to brave my dad again.”
Steve hums. “He’s still alive?”
“Yeah. ‘S he not? In four years?”
“I dunno exactly. Just… the way you phrased things made it sound like he wasn’t.”
“Well, hell,” Eddie laughs, raising the blunt like it’s a glass. “I’ll drink to that.”
Steve snorts and knocks his knuckles against Eddie’s, accepting the joint again after Eddie takes a drag. “So,” Eddie says, rolling over to lay on his front, propping himself up on his elbows. “Tell me the Steve Harrington hierarchy for dates. What comes first?”
Steve chuckles. “Why?” He asks, then answers regardless. “First date is getting to know each other, y’know? If you run out of things to say twenty minutes into it, how the hell’re you supposed to make a relationship work, right? So first date is making sure you’re…” he waves a hand around, looking for the right word. “Like… making sure you match.”
“Compatible?” Eddie suggests, and Steve snaps at him.
“Compatible, that’s it, yeah. Making sure you’re compatible. Second date’s for making sure you’re serious about it, making sure there’s still more to talk about, that you’re not gonna end up staring awkwardly at each other twenty minutes into that date because maybe you’re compatible enough for one date, but not really two, right?”
“So every subsequent date is just making sure you’re compatible.”
“I guess, yeah. Except when you know you are compatible, then you show ‘em who you really are. You put away your nice shirts and start getting out the everyday ones. The dates aren’t as planned out because they don’t need to be, because you already have fun together. Maybe you go to the arcade and you don’t let ‘em win. Or not as easy, at least. I’m still terrible at bowling. I don’t think there’s any hope for me.” He shakes his head with a chuckle.
Eddie raises a brow. “You’re telling me there’s a sport in which you don’t excel? This I have to see.”
Steve laughs and nudges his shoulder. “Man, shuddup.”
“No, but seriously,” Eddie says, and he sounds serious, so Steve drops his smile and listens. “If… if I were to go on a date, on a few dates, with a guy, maybe someone like you, and it’s going well, and we get to that point… I could imagine us doing pretty much exactly this.”
“Getting high on a roof?”
“Spending time together,” Eddie says quietly. “No expectations.”
“Oh,” Steve says quietly, sure his cheeks are scarlet.
“And,” Eddie says even quieter, practically a whisper, “I maybe wouldn’t mind trying with you.”
“As excited as that makes me,” Steve says, “and trust me, I’m pretty damn excited, I can’t help but think maybe we should wait until we’re past the end of the world.”
“Sure,” Eddie says, and brushes his knuckles against Steve’s. They both watch the movement. “Figure I’ve waited this long, what’s a little bit longer, right?”
“Yeah,” Steve murmurs, pressing his thumb to one of Eddie’s knuckles. Wishes he was pressing his lips to that knuckle instead.
He suddenly sighs. “It’s not just gonna be a week or two, y’know. It’s… when this is over, we can’t stay. Robin and I, we’ve gotta go back to the future.”
“Well, sure, but there’s some version of you that’s gonna stay, right?”
“And if that version of me doesn’t know that any of this happened? ‘M still an asshole, Eddie.”
Eddie grins and rolls over until they’re face-to-face. “I don’t think you’re capable of not being bitchy,” he says, laughing when Steve good-naturedly shoves his face away. “No, but hey,” he says quieter, more serious. “The Harrington Charm might be legendary, but us Munsons got a few tricks up our sleeves too, m’kay? If I have to win you back, I’ll do it. Or could you write yourself a note, maybe? Alli’s staying, she could give it to you. You could write to ask any one of us about it, and we’d tell you.”
Steve hums. “How do you do that?”
Eddie blinks. “Do what?”
“Make me feel like everything’s gonna be alright.”
Eddie blushes, but doesn’t answer, just offers Steve the joint again.
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mizz-sea-nymph · 2 months
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Attention: if you are not @hebemina then I advise you don’t respond to this cause just by that you’ll embarrass yourself by proving my points and being literal proof.
Id like to say that me and her where friends but during the time we where friends she had her weird moments and her alright moments especially when we first met, it wasn’t her acting like the adult it was me, funnily enough I started referring to her as a sister cause that’s what I do when I worry about how a person views me, it was clear I was uncomfortable and got my friend who remember the first encounter and how I reacted to this ask a while back, hell I even asked them how to respond to the ask cause I was in such a panic. When looking at it, I’m genuinely disgusted how she didn’t even apologise or better herself, everyone keeps saying she’s better but she isn’t and it’s really sad how harmful it is especially to the people she spoke with that she made uncomfortable.
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(She was drunk and I was mortified and didn’t even know how to respond so I danced around it I’ll admit that but thing is she didn’t even apologize)
Now it’s hard to show this from the past cause of personal stuff but since some people already know about it I guess I just gotta grow some balls. I’m showing this from the past cause I came across it a while ago and got disgusted, I was a child and I was mortified so much so I asked my friends how to respond to it and was so ashamed and embarssed I thought I deleted this but luckily didn’t cause one can realize how horrid this is. What’s funny is a DECENT AND SENSITIVE AND CARING PERSON would apologise! You never apologized Mina! and this wasn’t the first time you got weird with me! Seriously! Atleast have the decency to say sorry! But not just this you’ve many times turned our platonic and happy convos to something straight up weird, I ended up deleting many on my blog cause of unlike you I feel embarrassed!
I went through a hard year and having someone like this disturb me online was the icing on the cake but of course I was too embarssed and scared to say anything about it cause I feared I’d be yelled at, by your followers, yeah allot of you made me not even want to stand up for myself and say “what you are doing is rubbing me the wrong way” despite her knowing my age, and despite me reminding her constantly at that time I kept saying “haha I’m in high school”. So to the people reading this, dont make her seem like she Dosent know the age of her followers cause she lurks, she lurks around even accounts she has now ignored just cause said acount has a different opinion then her.
Thought I didn’t notice? I easily noticed how you and @hanaiikiki or whatever TF her name is now stopped talking to me as a whole and started ignoring my existence, even when I was geniunely trying to be nice etc, you stopped when I voiced my opinion about Loki, Hana going as far as telling people she Dosent know me (girl I got ears everywhere, when I heard this I was shocked cause I thought we where good!) despite me clearly stating as a continuation I don’t care what anyone likes and Dosent like it’s the VICTIM BLAMING, that’s wrong and also rly weird. So I don’t understand why both of you would let a fictional character come between a nice mutual friendship, especially you Hana I geniunely liked talking to you I liked talking mythology and liked sending you asks, you where really nice and kind with me and didn’t weird me out like Mina but it’s clear you have no self identity what so ever. But of course, no worries! I have no need for you! I know who my people are and aren’t and you aren’t one of em that’s for sure. As for Mina, yeesh girl yeesh that’s all I got when it comes to this, cause again no self respect self shame or friendship is magic in this case, but then again you’re no use of me either so I’ll say I’m glad you don’t speak to me anymore cause you creeped me out many times :)
just cause someone hides behind a cute kind persona dose not always mean that’s what they are on the inside dishonesty is sm. I’m honestly so dissapointed so many here defend her and say she’s changed instead of her saying she has, let her speak for herself if she’s so much so as the adult she claims to be.Let her speak cause I’m amazed how everyone walks eggshells around her cause she’s “sensitive” that is a insult to sensitive people as a whole.
I’m not going to mention who cause I want them to rest easy cause they are dear to me and what they experienced today breaks my heart they’re so sweet and didn’t deserve any of this, but when Mina apologized to them, Mina used the excuse of “I didn’t know you where a minor” despite her MENTONING THEIR AGE! Everyone knows people that know what they’re doing use that excuse, they lie, they will always go with this excuse, don’t get offended and stop reading now Mina I ain’t calling you a pedo, I’m calling you a dumbass, a real big dumbass as a whole for that shit apology and excuse. A victim of harassment Dosent deserve this, and a “sorry” dose not make up for the trauma the victim suffered let alone this type of “sorry”.
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(I’m covering the name cause I rly feel bad for who experienced this and believe the poor thing has experienced enough today of all days like good god I don’t even want anyone to comfort me I’m fine! Just show some support and love to this victim cause good god)
there’s a line with senstivity and irresponsibility, and if it weren’t for me sending a respectful i REPEAT a respectful I’m a respectful person that’s how my mama raised me, anon ask saying you shouldn’t interact with minors much cause they’re easy to influenced and they see what you post easily etc etc, the useless “minors do not interact” wouldn’t be there. Oh and it’s hilarious how you have it there and still interact with said minors? Sweetie? It’s not there for show! Lotus? Heldril? Goddamm new comers? Children copy and children get affected! And you’ve clearly traumatized and affected a bunch! If you’re a so called elderly care giver you should know how to care for others that aren’t just you, make it make sense!
Oh and let’s not leave this out the cake. It’s funny how you talk about masturbating in public and how you vent in public, letting literally people who are younger than you be your therapist, or witness you sexting IN PUBLIC keep it in the dms woman! have so shame! This isn’t red lobster you embarrassing yourself! I ain’t slut shaming you cause I’m the queen of sluts, I’ve been called a slut for years and I didn’t even know about it so don’t think I’m slut shaming you. But really How wonderful really! A nurse! Who gose through the struggle of whipping elderly asses for a living! Doesn’t go to a therapist and relays on people decades younger than her! Get a damm therapist! Be ashamed! Seriously take some responsibility!
Not to mention I still remember how people expressed geniune concern for you and you milked it and said “see you on the other side” who says that! I was one of those people! I actually worried? But I woke up and realized what the fuck is this? Are you serious??? Some of these people who are worried for you are younger by years?? Some even minors?! Get a grip??! Where’s the responsibility?? It’d be better to write about your horny thoughts on a blog strictly for NSFW! I deadass told you to in the anon ask cause you need to be responsible! And dont you dare post a “im sorry 🥺” post! I know your type and I know them well! Just by that post where you explained yourself about the whole issue of you saying you want to make out with a minor, says allot. You didn’t address the issue! You just said it’s okay to hate you! You didn’t even defend yourself! Well for one Mina, I don’t hate you, I just hate the way you act,behave and your personality as a whole because that “sorry” will never cut the anxiety and horrible memory as a whole, be ashamed a bit, it’s not funny to make everything sexual and as a adult you should understand that.
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What you did to those mods and roleplayers? I’m still speechless and have Vietnam flashbacks when it comes to the public sexting good god, atleast as if it’s okay to do NSFW and sent a literal pic of you bust? I know dirty I’m the QUEEN of dirty that hand on your top pulling the shirt a little lower shocked me so much my eyebrows left to Saturn and had a baby with the planet! I’ve got eyebrow planet grandkids now that’s how shocked I was. Not to mention the mod was 19 you are literally a decade older girl- tf is this lore Olympus? I know you like lore Olympus but girl lore Olympus is lowkey shit no offence. Honestly no wonder the mod stopped roleplaying and deleted the acounts cause good god girl- atleast have the decency to ask?
It’s really funny! Just a big joke really!
I for one was a friend with yo!u until I realized your true colors, I’m disappointed and consider this pathetic. I used to think you were nice and kind but I was met with dissapointment you genuinely disappointed me, hurt me and not only me but many others, don’t beat yourself about it just accept the fact that you did and just remove yourself from said minors and ACTUALLY BE RESPONSIBLE, before you hurt even more people.
As for the ones reading this,
You all know me and I’m pretty sure this is shocking seeing me a person here on tumblr call out the so called sweet Mina but honestly, people! nobodies perfect! Are you kidding me?? Get it through your skulls! She isn’t perfect and I’m not saying to hate her I’m saying to stop treating her like a child! when actual children here are being harmed! I’ve seen minors on here who deadass have been affected by her! And nobody I say nobody! don’t you dare say she didn’t know what she was doing that’s a insult to the victims and disgusting in general.
Also it’s not the ror fandom that’s changing, this has nothing to do with ror, to anyone reading this know this, it’s the Mina fandom that’s changing, not the ror fandom I’ve been in the ror community long before her and if sm was changing I’d know.
I’m deadass saying this despite me being a decade younger then Mina, I’m not saying this as a friend, not as a friend cause I don’t see you as that anymore and will never will ever again, im saying this as a person who’s going to be honest with you,
Keep it real
Enough of this self cantered,narcissistic ,immature, shameful,irresponsible and selfish behavior, you should be able to expect opinions like this, stop hiding behind your followers and say what you have in mind Mina and DONT dance around the issue, I read your “apology” post when the Heldirl issue raised to light, you didn’t even talk about the issue in hand, you just said it’s okay to hate you! Three paragraphs!! don’t dance around this, and you know what, Don’t even respond if you plan on doing that, cause that just proves the point.
Just know I don’t respect you not just cause of you being weird in the past with me but also with others specifically others I care about, so don’t come crying to me cause I geniunely don’t care I know these types of etiquettes, a sorry will never cut shit like I said so call me a cruel bitch idc ig it’s fair 🤷🏻‍♀️ just know I DONT respect you one bit,good day.
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Tagging
@amphitriteswife @tinyy-tea-cup @mono-supports-palestine @praisethesuuun @riseofamoonycake @brokensenseofhumor @monstertreden @heldril @lotusmybeloved @nicasdreamer @ idk
idk who tf else to tag aaaa 💀 but yeah that’s my take on all of this respect me hate me I don’t care I rather be hated for who tf I am then who I pretend to be and who I am is a person to keeps it real 🤨
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the-guilty-writer · 1 year
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A Prentiss Genius
Request from anon: Prentiss sibling being smarter than Reid. They work in England but is visiting their sister. And in the end it’s just Reid and reader playing poker and chess. (And freaking out the rest of the BAU)
Bonus points if it is an autistic reader
Emily Prentiss x sibling!reader, Spencer Reid x platonic!reader
Summary: When another Prentiss comes from across the pond for a visit, they give the BAU’s genius a run for his money.
A/N: this was fun to write. I hope it’s fun to read! Thanks for the request. Feedback is always appreciated.
CW: typical criminal minds things, mentions of a case, reader gets slightly overstimulated.
---
You put on your best headphones- the strongest noise canceling ones money could buy- and tried your best not to panic as you ducked through the busy airport. On the plane you were able to distract yourself by thinking about the mechanics of the aircraft and how everything was built and engineered. It had gotten you through the flight, but the airport was a different battle.
Emily had been precise about where she was meeting you- something you were grateful for. When it came to busy places like this you didn’t like guessing games. Someone brushed up against you lightly and you felt your body begin to tense. Physical contact was bound to happen in a place this crowded, but that didn’t stop the build of pressure inside you. If you didn’t relieve that pressure soon, you might explode.
Thankfully, your sister was exactly where she told you she would be- sitting on the silver bench closest to the baggage claim trolley for your flight. Just the sight of her helped you relax, and when you saw that she had already taken it upon herself to grab your luggage so you wouldn’t have to be in the crowded building any longer than necessary it helped you relax even more.
She smiled when she spotted you. After a whole year of not seeing one another she had changed her hair style, her signature lip gloss color, and had obviously bought a nicer pair of boots, but her smile never changed. She also knew better than to talk to you or touch you before you got someplace quiet- your sister knew you like nobody else and for that, you were grateful.
Once you were finally in the passenger seat of her SUV, you took off your headphones and took a deep breath. Emily swung herself up into the drivers side and looked over to you. She offered her hand to you and you gladly reached to lock your pinky finger around hers for just a second- a Prentiss pinky hug, something the two of you had invented when you were children and Emily discovered that sometimes a real hug was too much for you to handle.
“I missed you, Em,” you said.
Emily smiled. “I missed you too, (Y/N).” She knew better than to ask you how your flight was. “But now you’re stuck in the States with me for a whole week.”
“You should have seen Easter’s face when I told him I was actually taking a vacation,” you laughed.
“Yeah, well, you haven’t met my boss yet,” Emily said. She turned on the car and began to pull out of the parking space.
“Yet?” you asked.
Emily sighed. “Yeah. I’ve gotta go back to the office for a few hours to finish some stuff up. I can drop you off at the apartment if you need some quiet time. It’ll just be you and Sergio.”
You thought about it for a moment- weighing the pros and cons. Emily’s team had become a family to her. She knew all the people you worked with at the London Interpol office, so it only seemed right that you knew the people she spent most of her time with. Plus, if you were being honest, you didn’t want to be alone in a strange apartment right now.
“I’ll come with you,” you told her.
Emily smiled again. “It’ll be quick.”
But you knew Emily’s job. You worked a similar one back in England. Time at the office was never quick.
---
The BAU bullpen wasn’t all the different from the office back in London. Normally you would have felt overwhelmed in a new environment with phones ringing and people walking about, but the familiarity of it all was comforting.
You followed Emily to her desk and the two of you were quickly approached by a tall, buff, black man. Emily had already told you all about her team, so it came to no surprise when the first thing that he said was, “Well, Emily, aren't you going to introduce us to your friend?” in a playful manner.
“Oh, (Y/N), this is Derek Morgan, and Morgan, this is my sibling, (Y/N),” Emily introduced you.
Derek smiled. “It’s nice to finally meet you in person.”
“It’s nice to meet you too,” you said to him.
The glass doors of the bullpen opened and a woman in a bright yellow dress hurried in. Derek turned to her. “Baby girl, where are you in such a hurry?”
The woman didn’t respond. She simply shuffled quickly up the stairs and into someone’s office. You watched as she talked to a dark-haired man who was sitting behind a large wooden desk. His expression was stoic, but when he got up from his seat he walked with purpose.
“Team in the conference room, now. Even you, Prentiss,” the man said as he walked towards what you assumed was the conference room. Derek said something about gathering Reid and JJ- two names you recognized- and walked off.
Emily sighed heavily. “I’m sorry, (Y/N).”
“It’s fine.” You shrugged. “I get it. I had to flee the country so they didn’t pull me into a case.”
Emily laughed as she walked toward the conference room. “That’s why I usually come to you. Hopefully it’s just an emergency consult. Make yourself at home. There’s tea in the kitchen!” She disappeared behind the conference room door.
You made yourself comfortable at your sister’s desk. The star puzzle you had given her years ago sat at one corner. You pulled it from its place and took it apart before piecing it back together. Most people said it was impossible, but puzzles had always been easy for you and they should be considering you had an IQ of 188.
Out of curiosity, you looked up at the conference room. You couldn’t hear what they were saying, but you could see the images on the screen. A slim blonde lady with a remote was gesturing to the images. She pressed a button and the picture changed. It was a picture you had seen before- no. It was a picture of something you had seen before.
Your inherent curiosity carried you forward and before you knew it you were standing in the doorway of the conference room, the star puzzle still in your hand, your gaze unwavering from the screen.
“I’ve seen that before.” The words came out of your mouth before you could stop them. You were so entranced by the image you didn’t even notice all the people looking at you.
“Who are you?” The words of the stoic man broke your trance.
Emily stood up from her spot at the table and came to your side. “This is my sibling, (Y/N). (Y/N) this is Agents Hotchner, Rossi, Jereau, Penelope Garcia, and Dr. Reid.” She gestured around at the people at the table.
“How have you seen this before?” Rossi asked.
“I work for Interpol,” you explained. “The symbol carved into the wrist on the victim- it’s the same symbol that a European hacking group used to sign their viruses. We shut them down about a year ago but I had a suspicion that there might be more members outside of the continent we hadn’t found yet.”
“Well that narrows it down a lot,” Derek said.
“Tell the NYPD that we’re on our way, JJ. Wheels up in twenty. You too, Prentiss,” Hotch said to your sister.
“No, no wait,” you said. Everybody sat down and looked at one another. “The body was found in New York?”
“Yes,” JJ said. “Is there something wrong with that?”
“They’ve murdered two times before this; once in Brussels and again in Israel. They left the bodies in Antwerp and Tel Aviv, the largest cities, but the group’s headquarters were in the capital cities of Brussels and Jerusalem. It’s a forensic countermeasure. Chances are the group is here in DC. My guess is that you don’t have the right software to track them, but your counter intelligence division should.”
The team looked around at one another. “Garcia, go down to counter intelligence and see if they will allow you access into their system,” Hotch instructed. Garcia scurried from the room. “(Y/N), is there anything else we should know?”
You let out a heavy sigh. “This might take a while.”
Rossi smiled. “Then pull up a chair.”
---
It didn’t take long for Garcia to locate the headquarters. Soon enough, the team was gearing up to go out on a take-down.
“Prentiss,” Hotch said. You looked up at the call of your name, but he was talking to Emily. “We’re going to need you to come with us.”
Emily looked towards you. “Will you be okay here by yourself?”
Today had been a lot for you- between hours on a plane, then navigating the busy airport, and meeting and working with several new people. It was rather draining.
“I can stay with them,” Reid offered. “The medical doctor still hasn’t cleared my knee for running or climbing.”
You and Emily locked pinky fingers for a second before she followed the rest of her team out of the room, leaving you alone with the young doctor.
You were beginning to become bored with the star puzzle- you had already done it 23 times since you got there- so you looked up. Reid was playing chess against himself. You watched as he studied the board carefully, then moved a pawn forward.
“You should have moved the knight instead,” you said. “You’d have check in three instead of check in five.”
“You play?” Reid asked. You nodded. Without another word, he reset the board and moved it so you could reach the pieces better. He moved first with a conservative single pawn forward. You smiled- this was going to be too easy.
---
“It’s… freaky,” Morgan muttered.
“It’s uncanny,” Rossi agreed.
“It’s something.” Emily smiled. 
“It’s time to get back to work,” Hotch said. But nobody moved, not even him.
For the last hour the team had sat around watching you and Reid play chess- you had won 7 times and he had won 5- and now poker. Currently, he had won three games and you had won two, but with the hand you had it was surely going to allow you to tie up the score. Reid set his hand down and you smiled, setting down yours as well.
“But-” Reid looked at the cards. “The probability of that hand is-”
“0.0001%,” you finished for him.
“How in the world-” JJ started.
Emily laughed. “(Y/N) has an IQ of 188. Just one point above Reid.”
“Oh, our poor good doctor,” Garcia cooed.
“Pretty boy finally met his match,” Derek joked.
“You think we can steal them away from Interpol?” Rossi asked.
This time you answered for yourself. You turned to the team and said, “Not a chance,” just before Reid began dealing out cards again.
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|| Rough Road ||
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Frank Castle x female Reader.
Tags/warnings: 'annoying acquaintances of circumstance' to lovers, fingering, oral (f rec), unprotected sex (wrap in RL!), swears 😯
Author's note: This is for the TFC December fic challenge 'Snowed In', so check the tags for more!
If you enjoy my fics please consider reblogging, it means others get to enjoy them too! Thank you so much for reading! 💕
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"I think we should try and find somewhere to pull over." you say to Frank. You had been driving for hours and the snow was coming down harder now.
"Mm, I'm pretty sure there's a motel about 15 miles ahead, we can make it, get a couple of rooms and start again in the morning." He replies, concentrating on the road.
You stare up through the windscreen at the neverending horizonless thick grey-white of the sky and the flurry of heavy flakes building up on the road ahead of you. "I don't think we'll make it that far."
Sure enough after another couple miles the road became impassable, you had hardly seen any other cars ahead of you or coming the other way for most of the drive. It was gonna get dark fairly soon.
"Shit." Frank says simply, turning off the ignition after he stopped the van at the side of the road.
"Thank fuck I've got cell service" you say, "I'm gonna call for a truck."
While you were on the phone Frank checked his paper maps for the nearest habitations, but there was nothing that warranted risking trying to walk through a snowstorm at night.
"Okay, the rescue company is dealing with shitloads of people in similar situations and 'cos we've got a van and some supplies they're saying we're further down the list. Earliest they could get to us is tomorrow morning."
"Alright, well they'll probably have cleared the roads by then. Guess that ain't too bad. Just gotta hunker down for the night."
You kicked at the dash in frustration. "Urgh. I told you we should've left after the storm, now we're stuck here in your stupid van, which stinks by the way."
"Stinks?" He screwed up his face in disbelief. "What of? I keep it clean!"
"Of you!"
"Listen, as much as you're a complete pain in my ass it was too dangerous to wait in the city any longer. Now the Russians associate you with me…"
You threw your head back against the rest and sighed. "Yeah. I know. Just gotta lay low for a while." you parroted.
"This ain't exactly my idea of heaven either sweetheart."
You hated when he called you that. Even though it was just an automatic thing for him and it didn't mean anything it really annoyed you. He reached into the back bringing out a pack of cards from the seemingly random selection of shit he had squirreled away there. "Imagine you don't wanna talk about what happened, so it's this or I-Spy."
You groaned and nodded as you whiled away an hour or so playing blackjack until your hungry stomach noises got too loud to ignore.
"Alright, chicken or beef sub?" he asked, diving into the backpack.
You chose the chicken.
"Damn, this is really good. You pick them up before we left? Where from?"
"Made em." He replied, taking a bite of his own.
"Huh." You mused, digging in again.
"Surprised I can make a sandwich?" He scoffs.
You shrug. "Surprised you can make a good sandwich. Guess being ex-marine you gotta have some talents."
"You got no idea." He throws you a wink as he takes a sip of coffee from the thermos and you roll your eyes.
After another hour of whooping his ass at blackjack and a lightning quick excursion into the nearby trees and back to relieve yourself, your yawns and heavy eyelids make it clear that you're gonna have to go to sleep at some point soon.
"Does one of us, uh, need to keep watch or something?" You ask him, watching as he crawls into the back of the van and starts digging out a mat, a singular sleeping bag and blanket.
"Nah. Even if they did send someone to follow us ain't nobody getting through this, we're safe enough." He rolled out the bag and caught your awkward look.
You wrapped your arms around you, it was getting cold now the residual heat from the van had disappated. "So… just the one lot of bedding then?"
He nods. "Yeah, usually just me in here y'know, with all my stank."
You rolled your eyes again. "Yeah, I guess that makes sense."
He has to resist the urge to let you panic about sleeping beside him for a while longer, he's not that cruel. "It's okay, you can have it. I'll be alright up front." He sees your visible relief as you process what he's said, nodding and rummaging in your pack for the toothbrush and toiletries you'd thankfully picked up at your last gas stop, there having been no time to grab anything but the absolute ultimate essentials before you left.
The thick layer of snow that had built up around and on top of the van probably provided quite a bit of insulation, but that didn't exactly stop you from being fucking freezing. You tried to snuggle up deeper into the sleeping bag, all your clothes and a beanie on and the blanket on the top, but you were still cold. You tilted your head up to glance at Frank in the passenger seat, still awake with his jacket on and arms wrapped around himself tight, the occasional puff of his breath misting the air.
"You awake?" You ask, already knowing he was.
"Yeah. You alright?"
"Cold."
"Yeah."
The silence between you seemed to stretch on forever. You pull the blanket tighter around you.
Fuck it. "Uh, if you want, you could come back here, share the blanket? And y'know, body heat will help I guess."
"Thought you couldn't stand my stink?" He throws back at you.
"Well, the cold is kinda trumping that, but it's fine if you don't wanna… just thought it is your stuff after all, don't wanna put you out of your own van."
"Nah, s'good idea." he agrees, climbing into the back with you. You shiver at the initial chill as he lifts the edge of the blanket to lie next to you, your back to his. His jacket is cold against you but after a while you began to warm up, stopping your shivering and finding yourself drifting easily to sleep.
When you wake up it's still dark but you're warm, hot even. As you gradually gain a bit more consciousness you realise that the reason is because Frank has you in a bear hug. He must have turned around in his sleep. His arm is draped over you, big hand splayed over your stomach pulling you impossibly close to him. The only skin contact is his nose at the back of your neck, the warm exhales tickling the light hair there.
It's… pleasant, maybe even something more. He actually smells good. You smile to yourself thinking about the juxtaposition of this killing machine, this angry guard dog let off the chain being a big soft snuggly puppy of a man behind closed doors.
You shift slightly in his hold and then freeze.
Okay, maybe not so soft…
Despite the layers of clothing and a sleeping bag between you, it's unmistakable that it's his cock that's hard and pressing against your ass. You try to rationalise. It's just a normal bodily response after all, but do you dare move? What if he wakes up and it gets awkward, you've got a lot of driving still to do if this snow ever clears…
Any control is taken away from you as Frank stretches momentarily and then wraps you even tighter in his arms, his nose nuzzling into your skin and hips slowly grinding against you with a quiet contented moan. He suddenly stops, pulls away as he wakes and realises where he is, where you are, and what he's doing.
"Shit, fuck…" he turns away from you as he sits up scrubbing his hand over his face. "I'm sorry, I uh… it's uh, been a while since… y'know?"
The blanket rustles softly as you shrug.
"Fuck, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to-" He cuts himself off as his eyes adjust to the darkness, his ears registering the sound of the sleeping bag zip being opened and his gaze finding the smallest glimmer of soft light reflected in your own.
"It's okay. S'been a while for me too," you admit. This might be the stupidest decision you've ever made when it comes to sex, or even when it comes to roadtrips, but you can't seem to override it. Not when he looks at you like that, smells like that, makes you feel like that. He saved your life but you don't think that's all it is.
You slough off your defensive dislike and begin to embrace something that at least feels real.
His face is a picture in the dim snow-reflected light within the van as you reach for him, pulling his warmth and his lips towards you. He's taken aback, but his hand cups your jaw and you find yourself surprised by the tenderness with which his mouth meets your own. You don't waste a second, catching his wrist and guiding him down to palm over your chest, quickly leading his hand under the waistband of your pants so he can feel just how much he's affected you in this short space of time. It's like you're trying not to have the time to think about it. You both carry ghosts from your past that you've never openly shared, but you know, simply from the slight hesitation in his touch even as you urge him on.
The tender kisses soon heat up. "Call me sweetheart again." You breathe against his mouth, and he groans deep as his fingers meet with the wetness at your core. Your own hands explore underneath his jacket, fingers feeling the hard muscle of his chest under his shirt. You reach down to cup his cock through his jeans and then tug at them, moaning as he hurries to unbutton your pants so he can swipe his fingers through your slick folds. His mouth is on your skin, hungry to taste more of you as you scrabble to undo his pants too, urging them and his underwear down just enough to free his gloriously erect cock. He helps you wriggle halfway out of your pants too and now you're jacking each other off like a couple of teenagers, his fingers slippery and desperate over your throbbing clit, and yours covered with sticky precum as you wrap your hand around and stroke him.
"Oh shit…" you whine, as he skillfully brings you closer to the edge, your hips moving against his hand as he watches you. You forget the cold, gasping as he slips a finger inside you, your grip tightening around his cock making him grunt in such a delicious way that you can't help the words spilling from your lips.
"Frank, fuck me, please!" You're begging, you've never begged for anything other than to stay alive, but you need this, you want to feel him inside you, there's nothing else that will satisfy the ache.
He pauses, staring at you like you've just proposed or something. It takes him a hot minute to register what you're saying, but once those words sear into his brain he moves fast, lips sucking and kissing at the skin of your neck like a brand as he yanks your pants all the way down and off, his mouth following. He pushes up your shirt when he gets to the hem, his tongue trailing right up the centerline of your body to your bra where he mouths over the curve of your breasts before pulling down a cup. You arch your back as he takes your peaked nipple between his lips before he continues downward.
You claw at his shoulders as his nose bumps at the front of your underwear, just giving your clit the barest pressure, teasing you instead of giving you what you need, but you soon change your mind as he hooks his fingers under the elastic pulling them off you so he can bury his face in your pussy. He presses your thighs apart, holding you down as your hips try to rise up to meet the mind melting sensation of his tongue on you, in you. You moan, curse, and praise him as he quickly stokes your need and desire into a sharp dense point where you can do nothing else but implode in on yourself, screaming his name as he makes you feel.
He rises from between your thighs, licking his glistening lips with a small smile. It looks good on him.
"You alright, sweetheart?"
"Getting warmer, could be better." You throw back as you catch your breath and return the smile, yanking him back over you and using your feet to help him push his pants all the way off. When you take him in your hand again his gaze flits between your eyes and your mouth, which he claims in a hot kiss as you guide him to you, reveling in the feeling of the head of his thick cock spearing inside your heat.
"God damn." is all he can say, and you can only agree as he repeats it like a mantra as the slow slide of his cock filling and stretching your cunt has your eyes almost rolling back into your head with a long and loud moan.
You wrap your legs around his waist as he rolls his hips into you, the mental and physical battle he's fighting between going slowly, gently, and pounding you fucking senseless is palpable. He's drawing out sounds that you would never even make when you're alone. It might just be because you haven't had any form of touch from anyone for a long time, but you're more certain that it's all him that's making you flustered, hitting all your spots and stripping you down to a bare wire of being with nothing but his soft dark eyes.
That growling, barking, flesh-ripping fighting dog is still there underneath, you can feel how he holds it inside himself, yanking at the chain and always ready to be released when there's a need. The fact that he's driven you out of the city is proof that he actually cares what the fuck happens to you, and that sort of blows your mind. You could have easily gone alone, you were ready to jump on a Greyhound and make your own way but he wouldn't have it. He made you his responsibility. Yeah he was a killer but he was also a protector. Your protector.
He wasn't much of a talker but with his dick buried inside you he's soon gritting out reams of praise that have you clenching around him and mewling as his hand squeezes over the firm curve of your ass.
"Feel so good girl, s'fucking tight…"
You inhale sharply as he reaches between your hot skin to find your clit and ensure that you feel what he's feeling. Your fingernails graze over his scalp and the short hair at the nape of his neck as you pull him even closer, your second orgasm building up fast as he drives into you over and over.
"Ohh, god-"
"That's it sweet thing," he murmurs against your ear as the indescribable feeling of his cock dragging inside has you both on the very edge. "C'mon angel, such a good girl f'me."
You keen at the praise, something he'd unlocked from your subconscious with the simplest key, something even you didn't know you would react to. "Fuck… you're gonna make me-"
Frank feels you start to shake around him, moving his fingers even faster over that swollen little bundle of nerves. It's too much.
"Shit. You feel too fuckin' good, I gotta-" He moves to pull out suddenly and you claw at his ass stopping him before he does, you'll be damned if you don't feel him come inside you.
You whine as he stills. "Fuck! Don't stop, don't fucking stop…"
He looks for your assurance. "You sure? You want this?" his voice is quieter now, wavering. If you say yes he doesn't know that he'll last.
You nod frantically, tilting your hips up, wrapping your arms around his neck, the movement making him groan as you feel like utter heaven around him. He never thought you could be so soft, so open, needy.
The van rocks gently on its suspension as he resumes, every powerful thrust as he's fucking you punching such beautiful sounds from your throat. He can feel every gripping twitch of your perfect cunt as you begin falling apart underneath him, so tight, hot, and wet and quietly begging him to fill you. Your nails dig into the muscle of his huge shoulders and your mouth falls open, thighs tightening their hold around his waist as your moans crest. Don't stop, you told him, and he briefly wonders how he thought he ever could when you feel like this.
"Good girl, fuck- that's my good girl…" it's whispered and desperate, he's barely holding on by a hair.
The possessiveness in his words makes your eyes scrunch up tight and your body open. His cock is hitting you hard right where you need it, the focused touch of his fingers radiating out and burning you up.
"F-frank I-"
You unravel, crying out as you clench around him again and again as torrents of pleasure rip through your entire body. Your eyes fly open, locked on his, determined to witness how he might follow you into bliss. Your hips buck up chasing his own, his harsh warm breath washing over your skin with a deep, sensual moan as he finally lets go, pulsing inside you, not stopping the slowing, stuttering motion of his thrusts until he's given you absolutely everything he's got.
Laying there still entwined, a deep satisfying rumble from Frank's chest breaks the contrasting near-silence as he carefully rolls you on top of him and strokes his fingers lightly over your cheek and along your jaw, sliding them into your hair as his lips brush yours in a soft kiss.
"Frank..." you hum, your forehead resting on his. You can't stop your small nervous giggle as you're still unsure about what this is.
"Yeah." is all he says in return, his hands gliding down over your bare back and your hips, the sleeping bag and blankets forgotten now that inside the van had become a damn sight warmer. The windows with the covering of snow on the outside almost glow through the misting from your body heat on the inside of the glass. It's like you're trapped in a snowglobe. The image soon shatters as your mind clears from the dreamy fog of what you've just done.
"Shit. I-I'm sorry, I know that you-" you start to explain all the reasons that you know this is just a one-time thing, more for yourself than him, but he stops you before you can reel off the excuses.
"Hey," he says, gently catching your chin in his hand and running his fingers lightly over your skin. "We don't need to do all that shit, y'know?"
You can't help looking anywhere but in his eyes.
"Hey, c'mon, it's okay." He repeats.
You wish he wasn't like this, wish he would be colder with you, go back to the sniping, reluctant, thrown-together partnership, or whatever it was you had before. It takes effort but when you manage to meet the warmth of his gaze it feels like something you could get used to looking at.
"Look, it is what it is, yeah? I'm gonna keep you safe, no matter what."
You nod and allow him to pull you close to his chest, feeling the rise and fall of his breath and the thump of his heart through his ribcage.
"It is what it is," you murmur, your eyes growing heavy as you melt into sleep.
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Frank tags:
@divinearchangel @saintmurd0ck @castlesnchurches @mindidjarin @hellskitchenswhore @pedrito-friskito @sweetieswiftie @shedaresthedevil @freshabogados
@father4giveme @stress--relief @e-dubbc11 @whistle1whistle @tea-and-wine @emiemiemiii @imherefordeanandbones @phoebe-danvers @munsonownsmyass
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stardustprompts · 1 year
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house of ashes  -  the dark pictures anthology  sentence starters change tenses/pronouns as needed !!  some lines have been edited for clarity / length / ease of roleplaying     tw ;  language ,  war ,  death ,  drug mention ,  religion mention 
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‘I don’t know where i’d be without you.’ 
‘don’t you think it’s about time you came clean?’ 
‘all’s fair in love and war.’ 
‘I didn’t mean for you to find out like this.’ 
‘with all due respect, I think that’s the wrong call.’ 
‘quit being a bitch!’
‘I’ve got a real bad feeling about this.’
‘I wish you’d reconsider.’ 
‘it’s been a long time since we last saw each other.’ 
‘not a day went by when you weren’t on my mind.’ 
‘I’ve missed you so much, (name).’
‘how we left it ... things weren’t so great between us.’
‘we’ve been through worse. a lot worse.’ 
‘I wish I shared your optimism.’ 
‘you wanna ask me something. I can tell by the look on your face.’
‘you’re fucking with me.’
‘you got any other surprises you wanna drop on me?’
‘that’s gotta be about the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.’
‘I don’t know about you guys but something doesn’t feel right about this place.’
‘so is that this women’s intuition I keep hearing about?’
‘I don’t believe in curses, the tooth fairy, or santa clause.’
‘fuck. we’re so fucked.’ 
‘I won’t do it. this is not right.’
‘stay the hell away from me.’
‘you better not miss.’
‘you’ve gotta be fucking kidding me.’ 
‘I fucking knew it. I knew you weren’t ready for this.’ 
‘you didn’t see shit!’ 
‘I flunked history at school.’ 
‘tell me you don’t feel something...’
‘I don’t feel shit.’
‘we need to get out of here right now!’
‘you want the good version or the bad version?’
‘what the hell are you? what do you want from me?’
‘are you okay? are you hurt?’
‘I’m pretty good at looking after myself.’
‘I guess we could classify this as ‘quality time’.’
‘doesn’t this remind you of old times, (name)?’
‘maybe you don’t know me as well as you think.’ 
‘after you left, I learned to deal with pressure.’ 
‘do you not watch horror movies?’
‘you didn’t hear that?’
‘I didn’t hear anything.’ 
‘you can’t blame yourself.’
‘we’ve both made mistakes.’
‘I didn’t make it easy on you, (name). I know that.’ 
‘I don’t think either of us expected to be out of each other’s lives for so long.’
‘I’ve missed you, like you wouldn’t believe.’   
‘maybe there’s hope for us after all.’ 
‘there you go, reading my mind again.’ 
‘you always were a good guy. maybe too good for me.’ 
‘I want you back, (name).’ 
‘we were pretty damn good together.’ 
‘I know you better than you think, (name).’
‘admit it, there’s someone else, isn’t there?’
‘give ‘em hell, buddy.’
‘you gotta stop struggling!’
‘do you believe in god?’
‘you wouldn’t believe me even if I tried. hell, I don’t believe and I was there.’ 
‘come on, you’re jumping at shadows!’ 
‘whatever you think you’ve seen, it’s bullshit.’ 
‘take a mental picture and snap the fuck out of it!’
‘you got us into this mess, you better get us out.’
‘you wanna repeat that? that’s what I thought.’ 
‘I’m not sure of anything anymore.’
‘in battle, these things are often difficult to judge.’ 
‘are you on fucking drugs?!’
‘we’ve lost enough today.’ 
‘we can get through this, but only together.’
‘I’ve seen their weakness. they burn in sunlight.’ 
‘like any living being, they can be killed. a stake through the heart.’ 
‘we do this together, okay?’
‘what the fuck are we up against?’
‘never before have I ever seen anything so vicious.’
‘do you believe in demons?’ 
‘if you had asked me that before, I’d have laughed in your face.’
‘like you, I also never believed. but look around you.’ 
‘I don’t want to hurt you!’
‘there’s no point in fighting. not anymore.’ 
‘after all we’ve been through? thanks a lot!’
‘we fought it together and we won.’ 
‘I hope you’re a believer. when those things come back, you’re going to need a higher power to pray to.’ 
‘if I gotta fight these things, there’s no one else I would want by my side.’ 
‘cut the bullshit, (name). I know you and I know you care.’ 
‘trust me, you wanna get that shit out in the open.’
‘why is it that no one ever tells it straight? everyone just makes up bullshit to get by.’ 
‘if we die down here? maybe that’s what we deserve.’ 
‘‘fuck’ doesn’t even start to cover it.’
‘there’s no such thing as luck.’
‘do you mind?’
‘I’m glad you’re here.’
‘how did I know you were going to say that?’ 
‘gee, thanks, (name). you ever think about going into motivational speaking?’ 
‘that’s gotta be about the dumbest question I have ever been asked.’ 
‘I guess I just wanted to let go. you know, be someone new.’
‘you think it bothers me what they call me? i wear that shit like a fucking badge of honor.’ 
‘you and I... we’re not so different.’ 
‘please. please don’t leave me down here alone.’ 
‘don’t quit on me now!’ 
‘truth is so overrated.’ 
‘if you turn, it won’t be you I’m killing.’ 
‘I know you can do it, (name). you just have to have hope!’
‘you’re screwed enough as it is! if you stay with me, there’s no hope for you at all.’
‘(name) could lose his own ass if it wasn’t pinned on him.’
‘embrace the suck.’ 
‘you follow me, or you stay here and rot.’ 
‘it’s good to see you, (name). I thought we lost you.’ 
‘that’s not (name) anymore.’ 
‘you worthless pile of shit!’
‘the enemy of the enemy is our friend!’ 
‘well this looks like the worst place in the goddamn world.’ 
‘I don’t mean you any harm. I swear.’ 
‘honestly? I’m just glad to see a human face.’
‘my father once told me that if something looks like shit, and it smells like shit, you don’t have to taste it to know that it’s shit!’ 
‘I think you need to give your mouth a rest.’ 
‘every time you say something smart, you follow it with something dumb.’ 
‘hope is all we got left.’
‘funny how you can know someone for years and never really know them.’ 
‘a time will come when you will deeply regret this manner.’
‘I don’t carry regrets.’ 
‘it’s like nothing I’ve ever seen.’ 
‘not exactly honeymoon material, is it?’
‘my sole objective, (name), is to make you happy. doesn’t matter where we are or what we’re going through, I’ll always put a smile on your face.’
‘I thought I lost you!’
‘thanks for looking out for me.’ 
‘I can’t pretend like this didn’t happen.’ 
‘I still love you, (name).’
‘I knew you would always be there for me.’ 
‘I wanna try us again.’
‘I can’t turn my back on my past.’ 
‘if I didn’t give you a chance, I’d always regret it.’
‘you fucking deserve each other.’
‘I can’t end up like this.’ 
‘we are being judged. god is punishing us all for the mistakes we’ve made.’
‘we all have our reasons, they don’t have to be profound.’ 
‘I don’t even know what the fuck I’m doing here.’ 
‘I can hear you thinking.’ 
‘start believing, (name). we’re gonna get out of here and see the sun again.’ 
‘we’ll stand together. it’s the only way.’ 
‘in this place, everything’s possible.’
‘I thought you were dead.’
‘keep your head clear of everything but the task ahead. it’s the only way we’ll live.’ 
‘secrets keep you sick.’ 
‘if you need me, I’m here for you.’ 
‘I’ll always love you.’ 
‘you’ve come to join the fun.’
‘we’re not out of the woods yet. but what I see in front of me, you’re the best. fuck that, the best of the best.’
‘there’s too many of them!’
‘it’s been interesting knowing you.’
‘you’re late and you look like shit.’
‘I’m going to make sure those things stay buried in that hellhole where they belong!’
‘I’ll have to live with that.’ 
‘I learned not to rely on anyone but myself. I was stronger than all of them.’ 
‘I’ll never get used to this job.’ 
342 notes · View notes
maddogofshimano · 10 months
Text
Zhao Character Story
This was requested by the giveaway winner @trixibebe​ ! Hopefully it is worth the wait! I love Zhao a lot so this was great to do
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Summary: Zhao’s been informed that one of his long time friends is planning a coup against him, and will be eliminated. This quickly turns into a manhunt--and cathunt--as Zhao faces down his old friend.
Ijincho, Yokohama, has the underground ruled by 3 powers, commonly known as the "Ijin Three". This is a story about one of those people, a few years after the boss of the Liumang had been replaced by Zhao Tianyou... Qing Jin, Ijincho Close Associate of Zhao: ...Tianyou-sama. Regarding the matter with "Jin". (Tl note: the name is 陳 which as usual could be a lot of readings. I went with Jin, but Chen might be more accurate if I were keeping with how localization does it. separately, calling him Tianyou-sama instead of Zhao-sama is interesting)
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Zhao: Which Jin do you mean by Jin? Associate: Jin Yangming. (Tl note: okay yeah a name. I am guessing on specific readings as per usual) Zhao: Hmm~? What's Jin-kun done? Did he get a stomach ache? Associate: This is a serious matter. I've long had misgivings about him being a traitor. Zhao: ..... Associate: Recently he's been even more suspicious, so I had an internal investigation check it out. The result-- Associate: We learned that he's been gathering members from within the organization to stage a coup. Zhao: Are you sure there hasn't been a mistake? Jin-kun doesn't have the guts for that.
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Associate: No, I'm certain of this information. Zhao: Hmmmm.... Associate: ...By all rights, the planners should have been purged as soon as it was discovered. It never would have needed to be reported. Associate: That man... It's only because Jin is an old friend of yours that it's being brought to your attention. Zhao: So he's a friend of mine. That doesn't mean he's a good person. Associate: It's been decided to do the purge tomorrow night. Just so you're informed. Zhao: ...Gotcha. Knock 'em dead.
Fierce-looking Man: ........
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[a shuttered door opens] Zhao: Yo, Jin. How's the beef ramen taste? Jin Yangming: Zhao....! Zhao: Same as ever, this shop's my fave. Zhao: But the stir-fried Chinese cabbage is so good. You know how the garlic really pops? Zhao: Ah, but you were eating Chinese cabbage until two years ago, right? Did you get tired of eating it? Or is it due to your lady friend~? Jin: .......... Zhao: Oh yeah, how's your cat doing, Ranran-chan? It's just 2 years old. It's an indoor cat, right? Jin: ....I can tell you've been monitoring my activities closely. Let's just cut right to the chase then. Zhao: That right? Well, how about we do that. Zhao: Some of the elders in the group, they seem to have caught wind of your little plan. Jin: ....I figured as much. Zhao: The purge is planned for tomorrow night. Couldn't you save your own life by offering yourself up right now? Jin: Your father was a cruel and strict leader, but he had a passion for protecting the immigrants of this city. Jin: But what about you? You don't protect us Liumang at all. Acknowledging you as our leader... how could I do that?
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Zhao: So you're throwing a coup? Man, you've always been way too extreme. Jin: ...Thanks for the food. I'll leave the cash for it, boss. [he leaves] Zhao: ...Haaaaa~.
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The next night
[people are rushing down the street] Liumang Member: Jin went this way! Don't let him escape!!
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Jin: Shit...! Zhao: I got it. Jin: Zhao...! Zhao: But I do gotta ask. What's the point in doing this? Jin: Shut up.... At least I'll be able to deal with you! [they fight, Zhao kicks his ass] Zhao: Hey, how you doing Jin? You had enough?
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Jin: Shit... You're fucking dodging non-stop... Associate: Wait! Jin! Jin: ....Tch! [he runs off] Zhao: Tsk tsk tsk... He managed to get away. Associate: You all go after Jin. He absolutely cannot be allowed to escape!
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Associate: Are you safe? Zhao: Fit as a fiddle. Associate: To correct the blunder of allowing him to flee, the general foot soldiers have been mobilized. Zhao: OK. Well then, let's seal off the entrances and exits to the district.
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Zhao: Be sure to get the sewers and river too, anything that can be used to leave. We want him trapped like a rat. Associate: On it. I'll get it started. Zhao: Alrighty, now do I start my own punishment for the traitor?
[END PART 1]
Liumang A: Oi, did you find that Jin bastard?
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Liumang B: Nah, the room was totally empty. He must have come back once and then ran off again. Liumang A: I see.... With the district sealed off he's trapped like a rat. He has to be hiding somewhere here. Liumang A: You guys stay here and kill Jin if he returns. No mercy for traitors! Liumang B: Yes sir! [he leaves] Liumang B: ....Do we really need to keep watch on this place? It's not like Jin-san's gonna come back to his house when he's being chased. Liumang C: Yeahhh. But Jin-san's really boned now. How could he even consider something like a coup? Liumang B: If he gets caught, they're going to turn him into manju filling. Still, I can sorta see why he might not agree with our new nepotism boss. (Tl note: for those unaware, manju is a stuffed bun. also nepotism is a liiiitle bit of a stretch but he is complaining that Zhao just got the job because his dad was the previous boss) Zhao: Excuuuse me. New nepotism boss here. Relying on things like heritage isn't very rational, is it?
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Liumang B: B-Boss!? I-I'm sorry!! I was... Zhao: It's all good, man. But maybe watch your back better when you're in the mood for griping. Zhao: ...This here is Jin's house, yeah? You already checked it out? Liumang B: Y-Yes sir. We checked thoroughly for anything that might indicate where he fled to, but nothing turned up. Zhao: Hmmmmm... I gotcha. Was there a cat inside? Liumang B: A-A cat? No, there wasn't one... Zhao: So he took his beloved cat with him... I see. Zhao: Sorry for the bother. ...How bout you keep up the great work as look outs~. [Zhao leaves] Liumang B: Geez... I'm just glad I didn't get turned into manju filling.... [at a different set of apartments, a doorbell rings] Stern man: ...Yeah? Who is it? (Tl note: are these the same apartments you visit in LJ? haven't they been through enough??)
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Zhao: Yoooo, Taka. Hope you don't mind me barging in for a sec~. Heyyy~ as I thought this place is pretty nice. Is this stuff for a pet? (Tl note: his name is 王 which has a bunch of possible readings, Taka was a very arbitrary pick) Liumang Taka: Wh-... Boss...!? Zhao: Aw you don't have to call me boss, it's fine~. You're one of the people who disagrees with my hereditary placement, aren't you? Taka: No, that's not... Zhao: It's chill if you do. I'm not here to blame you for anything. Zhao: Actually, I'm here cause I think Jin's cat is here. ...Ranran-cha~n, are you here~? [Ranran meows at Zhao] Taka: !? Zhao: Hey, that hurt~. Zhao: Since it seemed like Jin took his cat when he ran, I've been hitting up all the homes of the anti-hereditary faction to see which ones could keep a pet~. Zhao: So, Taka... This is Jin's cat that you're taking care of, yeah? Taka: No... you've got it all wrong. This is my cat. Come get some food, Ran. Zhao: ...Hmmm~. Is that it. This looks an awful lot like Jin's cat, you know. Zhao: A black and white persian with odd eyes, how'd you end up with one that's just got so many similarities? Taka: ...I saw Ranran and wanted to get a kitten just like it. I also took the name from it. Zhao: Hmmm~ ...But, well, the little bit of thick black fur on the underside of its tail shouldn't be exactly the same as Ranran's, right? Zhao: Just let me check that real quick. Taka: No, you don't need to. It's there. It truly is a miraculous resemblance. Zhao: ........Wooow~, that's a hell of a coincidence. But, hmm, it doesn't seem like this cat has any thick fur like that? Taka: Eh!? Zhao: What I said was a lie, actually. The real Ranran doesn't have any black fur on the underside of its tail. Zhao: Oooh bad luck~. You fell for the oldest trick in the book. Taka: Guh.... uuhh..... uraaaaahghhhh!!!! Zhao: Woah there, I'm not letting you run. I've got a mountain of questions I gotta ask you now. Taka: G-Get ready!! You're already going to kill me...! I'll have to kill you instead to make my escape!!!! [they fight, Zhao wins] Taka: S-So strong... Why's some nepotism baby that strong...
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Zhao: Well that's a hurtful thing to say. I've never once lost a fight, you know?
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Zhao: Well now that the persuasion session is over... Talk to me~. Where's Jin? Zhao: Since you tried to escape, it doesn't seem like you're hiding him in your house. Taka: I-I don't know... I was just supposed to look after Jin-san's cat for him when it came time for him to escape. Taka: I really don't know anything else.... Zhao: ....You understand from before that you can't lie to me, right? Taka: I-It's not a lie!!!! I really wasn't told anything else!! Please believe me!! Zhao: .................Yeah, okay~. I believe you. Not like you have any room left to lie. Zhao: .........But just to be safe, how about you show me around this place. Zhao: ...Yep, no hidden rooms or signs of another person living here. Seems like he really isn't here. Zhao: Well, hiding in another anti-hereditary faction members' house is basically asking to be caught. Zhao: Sooo... He probably dropped the cat off and went directly to wherever he's hiding. Taka: Y-Yes sir... He wasn't able to bring Ranran with him... so he really stressed how important it was that I look after it... Taka: He knew I had raised and loved a cat, so he believed I would be trustworthy... Zhao: ...Hey Taka, what are some of the things that cats don't like? Taka: Things they don't like...? There's a lot. Hot stuff, the sound of the vacuum cleaner, water...  Taka: Besides those... really strong smells can be bad. All of that varies on the individual cat, though. Zhao: Really strong smells, huh... [flashback] Zhao: Yo, Jin. How's the beef ramen taste?
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Zhao: But the stir-fried Chinese cabbage is so good. You know how the garlic really pops? Zhao: Ah, but you were eating Chinese cabbage until two years ago, right? Did you get tired of eating it? Or is it due to your lady friend~? Jin: .......... Zhao: Oh yeah, how's your cat doing, Ranran-chan? It's just 2 years old. It's an indoor cat, right? [flashback over] Zhao: .....I probably got it~. Jin's location. Taka: Eh....?
[END PART 2]
[the sound of the door to the restaurant opening] Zhao: Table for one, please~.
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Owner of the Chinese Restaurant: ....Your seat is right this way. Here's some water. Once you decide on your order... Zhao: Owner-san, do you remember me? The other day I was here with a regular named Jin. Owner: ....Ah, so you're Jin's acquaintance. I don't know if something happened, but he hasn't been by recently. Zhao: Is that so~. Jin was a regular here, but you had a private relationship with him too, right? (Tl note: 🤨 🏳️‍🌈 ❓ ) Owner: ...It was a pretty limited relationship. Occasionally we went fishing together. Zhao: Hmmmmmmmm~ ...For having such a limited relationship, it's awfully kind of you to be sheltering Jin from the Yokohama Liumang currently chasing him. Owner: Eh? H-Hold on, where are you going!! Zhao: ...Bathroom~ at least I was planning to, but you're really jumpy huh, Owner-san. Zhao: Could that be becauuuse~.... if I take a single look into the backroom I'll see that Jin is hiding there? Owner: !? Zhao: Looks like I got it in one.... Jin, how about you come out already? All the exits are blocked, you're not getting away again. [Jin exits the back room] Jin: ......How did you know I'd be here?
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Zhao: Because you left Ranran with Taka. Jin: ........What? Zhao: You dote on your beloved cat. Therefore you would have taken it with you. But you didn't. Zhao: So the only explanation is that you must have gone to hide somewhere that you couldn't bring Ranran. Zhao: There's plenty of reasons I could think of why you wouldn't take Ranran. Safety, preference, the noise it makes... Zhao: However, you have connections with the Liumang and it's difficult to do a quick investigation, you could have established some trust, and you couldn't take Ranran... Zhao: So that made me think that the only place to hide must be Jinhua. This place reeks of garlic, which Ranran doesn't like. (Tl note: the store name is 金華 and could be some other readings but Jinhua is the reading for the city in China) Jin: ...How the hell did you know that Ranran doesn't like the smell of garlic? Zhao: Well, I didn't know about it originally. Zhao: I just noticed that the time when you stopped eating this place's famous stir-fried Chinese cabbage was the same time that you got Ranran. Zhao: ...That's when the lightbulb went off. Zhao: You started eating beef ramen without any garlic because Ranran hated it, right? Jin: .....Heh, you really solved that. You're a lot more clever than I thought. Zhao: Well, I'm a pretty capable kid, you know~. Jin: You've exceeded my expectations. But, after surrounding the shop and blocking all the exits isn't this a little naïve? Zhao: Hm? What's naïve about it? Jin: Coming at me alone!! I'm going to take you hostage and get the hell out of this town!! [they fight, Zhao wins] Jin: Wh-What was that power....
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Jin: Shit... Just kill me already. Call in your men and make an example out of me. Zhao: Ahh, that was a lie actually. The only person here is just me. Jin: What the hell...? Zhao: In 2 hours, there will be a 5 minute gap in the guards at the Jinhua bridge. You can use that to get out of the sealed district. Zhao: I just came here to say that. Well then, good luck. Jin: ! H-Hey...! Hold on! Why are you doing this... Zhao: As long as it saves lives, I'm fine doing anything. Jin: This ain't fine! I just tried to kill you! What sort of game are you playing at...!? Zhao: ...Haaa, don't you know people don't like guys who can't take a hint? Zhao: Just to be perfectly clear, you know how I'm the boss of the organization? So that means I have no choice but to make an example out of you. Zhao: I've known you for a long time. Besides-- Zhao: Since I was the boss's son, everyone treated me like some kind of cancerous growth, but you never had any restraint even with me. Zhao: That pissed me the hell off... but really that isn't a bad thing. Jin: Zhao... Zhao: Well, that's all there is to say on that. Enjoy your second chance at life. See yaaaa. [Zhao leaves] Jin: ....I'm sorry, Zhao....
A short time later....
Associate: ...And since then, we haven't been able to locate Jin. He may have left Japan by now.
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Zhao: My bad? I messed up on my initial call. I'm sure he must have left the city by then. Zhao: I'm sorry for being an unreliable boss. I'll be sure to work harder next time. Associate: ....We'll see if that happens. Zhao: Hm? Did you say something? Associate: No... Until next time.
[END]
BONUS TIME!
I love Zhao. he just goes around lying to people for fun. his two great loves in life are fucking with people and being a ginormous softie
Whenever I ran a line through deepl to doublecheck something it really really really wanted to call Zhao a girl due to all the tildes he uses lol. Zhao’s got 5 cards which is a pretty solid amount, including these two KSRs
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that’s it for now! look forward to two more posts in the near future! I’ve got an event and equipment to share!!
64 notes · View notes
rqgnarok · 11 months
Note
if requests are open, can i request jamie having a lightbulb moment realizing he’s into a male reader who’s very obviously shy/in love with jamie please? it doesn’t have to be that he realizes he likes guys but it could be? if you’re uncomfortable writing mlm relationships you can completely ignore this! no pressure ^_^ thank you!!
thank you for this! i've been itching to write jamie x m!reader! i hope you enjoy <3
"Don't get it, bruv," Isaac grumbles. "You buy 'em flowers, you take them to dinner, and they still won't get the hint. Women are fuckin' complicated."
"Men aren't exactly a walk in the park, are they?" Colin grumbles, his arm around Michael as his boyfriend presses a smiling kiss to his cheek, already familiar with this story. "This guy here spent months, months! Taking me out on dates before I realized we were dating."
"That might just be a you thing, hermano," Dani snickers, the guys laughing with him. "But I agree with Isaac. I always do the same when I have a crush on a girl: I make her a playlist of Mexican baladas and cook recipes from scratch. They never get the hint."
"Open communication is sexy," Michael pipes up behind his beer and murmurs of agreement fill the restaurant.
It's late, close to midnight, but Sam's always lenient enough to lend them the space for as long as they want. Everyone shares their own techniques of conquest: Rich gives them an expensive wine from his personal collection, Van Damme writes them notes about every little thing and leaves them scattered where they can find them, Jan Maas starts reading up on Dutch poetry.
At some point it's Jamie's turn to share, and he shifts a little in his seat at the sudden attention.
"Um, well," he stutters, playing with his napkin and ripping it into small pieces nervously. "I get touchy, I guess? Like, not in a creepy way, I just. More casual contact, you know? Like I'm drawn to them. And I laugh. I laugh a lot. Everything is funny, all of a sudden."
"That's everyone with a crush, though," Colin reasons. "There's gotta be something specific, no? Michael started wearing funny socks when we were dating, for some reason."
His boyfriend pipes up in offense, cheeks coloring. He says something about Colin listening to Britney Spears and binging The Kardashians when in love, which, for some weird ass reason makes sense.
Still, the momentary lapse in conversation isn't enough for the attention to slip off him, and Jamie keeps being badgered for information until he cracks. "Alright, alright! I guess I. I don't know, I. You know how I hate sharing my food. I guess I don't mind much when I'm... you know. In love and shit."
Finally, that's enough for the guys to move on to their next victim, but Jamie's thoughts stay stranded on his own answer. How did he know? He used to share plates with Keeley when they were dating, though his jaw would always clench a little in annoyance whenever she dipped in her fork without asking. It was a sanitary thing, really.
No, it was (Y/N) who sneaked into his mind when he said that. But that's different, ain't it? They've been friends forever, and it's different with guys, right? So what if Jamie doesn't care when he steals some of his chips or when he steals half of his sandwich when they're lazing around at his place? It doesn't have to mean anything.
But less than fifteen minutes ago he'd slapped Moe's hand away when he reached for chin chin out of Jamie's plate. And, like, Moe's his mate, Jamie would go to war for Moe, but still. Still.
"Shit," Jamie says softly to himself, the puzzle pieces inside his brain slipping into place. Again, a little louder. "Shit."
"What's wrong with you?" Isaac nudges his shoulder, quietly, thank God. Jamie can't bear to invite his entire team into his sudden romantic realization.
"Nothin', nothin'," he thinks about afternoons spent with (Y/N) in comfortable silence when everything else in the world was wrong; his mind too mean, the fans too opinionated, his efforts on the pitch not good enough. Fuck, Jamie has been a proper dumbass, hasn't he? "Just- I gotta go. There's somethin' I need to do."
He says his quick goodbyes and pokes his tongue out playfully when it gets a bunch of boos and disappointed whines from the guys. The cold Richmond air hits him full in the face as he leaves Ola's, brows furrowed as he texts.
hey u still up?
Jamie bites his lip as a response comes through seconds later.
yeah? Thought you were out w the boys tonight
His fingers hesitate before pressing down on the screen, fear be damned.
just left
any chance i can come over?
(Y/N)'s texts are quick, casual.
Of course. always
Everything okay?
Against all odds, Jamie smiles. He has a growing suspicion the night might turn out better than he ever hoped.
alls brilliant
ill be there in 20
89 notes · View notes
ambrossart · 7 months
Text
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THE SHRIEKING QUEEN'S CATACOMBS
— Session 1: **PREVIEW**
Preview Summary: Anxious about your first D&D campaign with Eddie, you visit Chrissy for a last-minute pep talk, and she gives you some friendly guidelines to set you up for success.
Pairing: Young!Eddie Munson x DWM!Reader
Note: This is a fic in the Dancing with Myself series. It can be read as a standalone, but it's more enjoyable with the full context.
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“Okay, should we go over the rules one more time?”
“No… I think I got ‘em down pretty well.”  
“Let’s go over them one more time.”  
Chrissy Cunningham paced the floor of her bedroom with an authoritative stride, her arms folded neatly behind her back, chin held proudly in the air. Standing at only five-foot-one, Chrissy looked like an adorable little drill sergeant… until she looked over at you, sitting on the foot of her bed with your chest puffed out and hand raised in mock salute. Then her composure shattered and she reverted back to her goofy, giggling, eleven-year-old self. 
“Don’t make me laugh,” she said. 
“What? I’m showing you respect.” 
Chrissy raised her eyebrows in friendly disapproval. “Stop,” she said. “We need to be serious.” So she donned an expression of stern command and resumed her stride. “Okay, repeat after me: I will not be mean to Eddie.”  
“I will not be mean to Eddie.”  
“I will not mock him.”  
“I will not mock him.”  
“I will not tease him.”  
“I will not tease him.”  
“I will not call him names.”  
“I will not call him names.”  
“I will laugh only when it’s appropriate and in a good-hearted manner.”  
“Wait, how are we defining appropriate?”  
“Just repeat it, please.”  
You sighed in surrender and echoed your best friend’s words dutifully: “I will laugh only when it’s appropriate and in a good-hearted manner… even though I don’t really know what that means.” 
Chrissy shot you a strict glare and continued: “I will not let my anxiety make me forget rules one through five.”  
“I will not let my anxiety make me forget rules one through five.”  
Chrissy stopped in front of you, put her hands on your knees, and smiled warmly. “I’m gonna have fun this summer.”
“I’m gonna have fun this summer.” 
“I’m gonna show Eddie what a smart, creative, and wonderful person I am.” 
“Well…” You looked away, embarrassed. 
“Say it,” Chrissy said, shaking your knees gently. “C’mom, c’mon, you gotta say it.” 
Her words made you squirm a little. Timidly, you looked at her and said in a bashful voice, “I’m gonna show Eddie what a smart, creative, and wonderful person I am.” 
“Because you are.” 
“… Because I am.” 
Chrissy’s smile grew. “Good!” She drummed her hands on your knees and stepped away from you. While rifling through her desk drawers, she said, “So what game are you playing exactly? Is it like a board game or something?”
“Uh, no… it’s like this fantasy roleplaying game. I don’t really know how to describe it.” 
“But you know how to play it, right?” 
“Yeah, for the most part.” 
“For the most part?” Now Chrissy sounded worried. “I thought you had been practicing. Isn’t that what you spent the last two weeks doing?”
“Well, yeah… but it’s a surprisingly complicated game.” 
“You weren’t paying attention, were you?”
“No, I totally was, I promise.” You had put in the time and the effort. Every day after school, you rushed home, hopped on your bike, and peddled down the street to the Wheeler house. You sat in that stuffy, smelly basement for two hours while a group of third-grade boys explained all the rules and then bickered over said rules. “There was just a lot of information being thrown at me in a short period of time. And I guess not everyone plays the game the same way, either, so even if I learned how they play the game, I still might not know how they will play the game, so… I’m just gonna wing it and hope my creativity saves me. Dustin said I made a pretty cool character for my first try, so…”
“Who?”
“Dustin Henderson. Third-grader. Doesn’t matter. The point is…” 
Mrs. Cunningham ducked her head into the room and said brightly, “Chrissy, dear, don’t forget we have to leave in twenty minutes.” Then she saw you and her whole demeanor frosted over. “Oh… I didn’t realize you had company.” 
You had been Chrissy’s best friend for five years and Mrs. Cunningham still referred to you as “company.” It was like she didn’t even see you as a person. You were just this disgusting blob that took up space in her daughter’s life. 
“I just stopped by for a minute,” you told her. “I’ll be leaving soon.” 
“Oh, don’t be silly," she said. "You know you’re always welcome here.”
Mrs. Cunningham lingered in the doorway for a moment, smiling and restlessly wringing her hands. Before leaving, she tipped her head toward her daughter and said, “Chrissy, stop slouching, dear.”
Chrissy heaved a frustrated huff, padded across the room, and closed her bedroom door. When she turned around, you both said in perfect unison, “Chrissy, stop slouching, dear,” and broke up into giggles. She was still laughing as she hopped onto the bed and sat down cross-legged behind you.
You turned around to face her. “So where are you going in twenty minutes?” 
“Just the salon,” she answered uncaringly. 
“Oh, please tell me you’re not getting a perm like your mother. I’ll hold you down and shave your head if you do.” 
“If she makes me get a perm, I’ll shave my own head,” Chrissy joked. “It’s just a trim. She makes me get one every three weeks; otherwise, I’ll get split ends.” 
“Oh, split ends… the scourge of society.” 
“Shut up,” Chrissy said, giving you a playful swat. “Be nice or I won’t give you your present.” 
You perked up. “A present, you say?”
“Mhm.” Chrissy flashed an excited smile, then reached behind her back and pulled out a colorful woven bracelet. “I made this for you.” 
You raised your eyebrow curiously. “Another friendship bracelet?” 
“No, this one’s not a friendship bracelet.” Leaning forward, she carefully tied the bracelet onto your left wrist. Its vibrant color perfectly complemented the other bracelet she had made for you. “This one’s for good luck.” 
You admired the bracelet for a moment, thanked her for making it, then felt your stomach bubble and churn. “Okay, now I’m getting anxious.”
“Don’t be anxious,” Chrissy said. “You’re gonna be fine.” 
But still you sighed. “What time is it?”
Chrissy turned and glanced at the alarm clock on her nightstand. “Nine thirty-five.” 
“Oh crap,” you said, and got up. “I better get going.” 
You grabbed your backpack off the floor, slung it over your right shoulder, and exited her bedroom. Chrissy followed you downstairs and opened the front door for you.
Before heading out, you turned back and said to her with sudden panic, “Should we go over the rules one more time?”
Chrissy shook her head. “No, you know the rules. Just be your normal charming, delightful self and you’ll be just fine, okay? I promise.” 
She sent you off with a gentle shove, and you went uneasily: down the porch steps, down the cobblestone path, and found your bike sitting beside the garage. After putting up the kickstand and swinging your leg over the seat, you looked up at Chrissy with a worried frown.
“What if it doesn’t work?” you asked. 
“What do you mean?”
“Like… what if I do all this and Eddie still hates me?” You shrugged helplessly. “What then?”
Now Chrissy was frowning, too. “Well, at least you’ll know you gave it your best shot.” 
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boygiwrites · 7 months
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Harley D. Dixon 23
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📖Chapter List.
Author's Note.
Warning for strong themes of suicide in this chapter because of Beth, and well, everything else.
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Herschel left the farm all by himself while we was out.
As the sun sets behind the porch railing, Lori explains to Rick and Glenn that Beth's in shock — the thing I was in this morning. She tries to mutter it under her beath, but I hear just fine that she tried to kill herself by slicing her wrists up. Different to how Momma did it, but I know just about every way there is, and that's one of 'em. If I were Beth, I would'a just jumped out the window. Prolly would'a worked, but maybe she didn't want it to. Lori and Patricia found her just in time to save her. She's laid up in bed now, apparently still staring at the wall.
Rick keeps glancing at me throughout the whole conversation. I don't know why he's doin' it, but I wish he'd cut it out.
Herschel told us today he'd learnt what grit was, but I guess he ain't learned enough to deal with his daughter wantin' to die, 'cause he hopped in his truck and took a trip to town to get away from it all. Maggie begs the two of 'em to go bring him back, and they agree.
"You got any guesses where he might'a gone?" Rick asks, putting his hat back on. Always savin' people. "Parks, stores, houses?"
"Hatlin's." She answers unhappily. "Bar on main street. He practically lived there in his drinking days. If he's gone anywhere, it's there."
I can't imagine Herschel in a bar. My Daddy and Uncle Merle used to rot away in bars when they was angry or sad, but that was them.
Rick must be thinking the same thing. "I didn't take Herschel for a drinker."
"He gave it up the day I was born." She half-smiles. "Didn't even allow liquor in the house... But not anymore, I guess."
"I've seen the place." Glenn assures her, holding her shoulder and turning to Rick. "I can drive us there."
"Okay." Before they turn to leave, he murmurs to Lori, "Does Daryl know 'bout Beth yet?"
She shakes her head and glances at me, too.
He warns her, "Well, you're gonna want to. Harley's been havin' a tough go of it and I ain't sure how this is... gonna affect her."
She gives a look of understanding. "I'll go talk to him now."
When he comes down the steps, he crouches in front of me. He's got his Dad-face on, the one that's all nice and reassuring.
"Hey, you did good today." He tells me. "How 'boutchu go find Carl and read some comic books together or something for a while?"
"Alright." I lilt, watching him gently clap me on my shoulder before following Glenn down the path toward the cars.
But as soon as they're gone, I don't go find Carl. I take myself around the side of the house and slouch between two old barrels in the grass, hiding from everyone. I've gotten real good at swallowing down the need to cry, so that's what I do. At some point, the darn ringing returns.
I wish some little animal would cross paths with me, so I could take my knife out and stab it dead. That'd make me feel better.
Merle would smack me if he saw me like this. Don't cry, Harley. Don't cry. Been a long, long day, but you don't gotta cry.
The sun soon disappears under the earth.
"Sh, sh, sh. Baby, it's okay." The night is quiet, but our little tent is filled with my pent-up sobs. "It's okay."
I wish I could go to sleep like everyone else, but I can't. The day's finally caught up with me. Rick and Glenn still haven't returned, but the farm's been a mess without 'em all the same. Dad's been watching me like a hawk since Lori spoke with him, and dinner was spent in silence, and I been trying not to cry for hours. He keeps crooning the same thing to me over and over. It's okay. I hear that stupid lie every time things aren't okay. It don't get any more okay-er no matter how hard I bawl or scream into his shoulder, or wish with all my heart and all my body, right down to my toes, that I weren't such a little wuss. I wish Sophia was alive. I wish Shane made it to Fort Benning.
Seems I'm always hurting. If anyone asked me what I did best, I'd say this. Sometimes feels like all I was made for.
I did good faking my way through the day, but as soon as I laid my head down to go to sleep and realized that I couldn't no more 'cause of my ear, I finally broke. Can't shoot, can't hear, can't sleep. Everything, even the way I curl up at night, been stripped from me.
"It's not okay," I moan, hating that when I close my eyes, I can still see the things I don't wanna. "S'all wrong. It hurts."
"I know it does, chicken. But I'm 'ere. I'm always here." He murmurs into my hair, holding me even tighter to his chest. "Just get it all out."
I wanna tell him I can't, it don't work that way. If you could cry yer sadness out, I would'a lost all mine by now. But he already knows. Just like me, he's made up of sadness. Most people say we're alike 'cause our matching scowls, our little moles. But more than anythin', it's that.
I don't think I've ever been this type of angry before. There's just nowhere to put it. There's no-one to blame. It's just inside me. And I think it'll be there forever, like my bones are. There's no use being sour at Rick or Dad for killin' Shane. You can't get mad at people when there's no right or wrong to it, when they was just doin' what needed to be done. Shane was crazy, we've always said it. He done so many things he shouldn't have. No, I ain't mad at them for that. Or at Glenn, or T, or Andrea for helping 'em. Not at the bullet that shot my ear off, not at the Greenes' God for takin' all my friends away. I'm just angry at being alive.
"He said it was gonna be d-different this time." He said a whole bunch'a things, but that one I remember. "Daddy, I want it t'be different."
"It will be, baby. It will. I'mma keep you safe with everythin' I got, okay?" At least that one's not a lie. "You know that."
"But I'on care about me." I pull back, my fingers twisted in his tank top. "It's everyone else that's dead. It's Shane and Sophia a-and Momma and Merle and Morales and prolly Meemaw and Kyle and my cousins. I'm sick of it! Ain't no point in movin' on if people gonna keep dyin'!"
"Don't talk like that, Harley Dixon." He gently scolds, brows twitching into a frown. "Don'tchu ever. There is a point."
Well, I don't get it no more. "I ca-an't even sleep properly, Dad."
"Well, let's just try again. You can lay on yer other side." He offers. "Dad'll read you another story, huh? Or you want me to sing again?"
"No." I croak miserably. I don't want a story. I don't even want a song. "Even if I go to sleep, t-that's ruined, too. I get nightmares. And when I wake up, it's the same thing all over again. Eatin' scraps and cryin' and takin' ringing meds just for somethin' else bad to happen."
"That's the way life is, Harley." He tells me, a little stricter this time. "I can't change it any more than you can. People die—"
"People mourn," I quote him with a roll of my wet eyes, "Life moves on. I heard."
"Stop it." He don't like that I mocked him, not one bit. Not when it comes to this. "It's true. We move on. We keep livin'."
"Well, maybe I don't wanna. Maybe I'm done."
Herschel says I got a thing called grit. Dad says I'm his brave girl. Carl thinks I'm some sorta badass, but really I'm just a nasty, broken little thing called Harley Dixon. I don't wanna keep living if living's full of death. Maybe it's better the other way. Beth thinks so. Momma sure did, too. I never got to ask her if it worked out like she wanted and got all her sadness taken away, but I like to think it did. I like to think there's no bad things where she is, only good and happy things. She ain't watched Shane die. She ain't stood at Sophia's grave. She ain't hurtin'.
"Little girl," Dad's voice is thin and shaky like a whisper, but also very, very, very angry. "I know you ain't just said that."
I stare right back at him through my tears without a word, 'cause I did say that. Not to hurt him, but because it's the truth.
He slowly starts shaking his head. "Nah, I ain't raised you this way. I ain't raised a girl that gives up."
My wobbly frown deepens. "So that's what Momma was, then? She was weak?"
"Yes. Weak an' stupid." He says unapologetically. "And I won't have you talkin' like her. Over my dead body, girl, I won't have it."
"And how's that?" I challenge him. "You gonna make Sophia come back? You gonna fix my ear? You gonna make Shane—?"
"Weren't me that did that, Harley. Weren't Rick, weren't nobody but himse—"
"—Come back? You gonna kiss it all better and sing a song?" I taunt, shouting in his face, "They're all dead!"
"I know they are." He argues, taking a moment to suck in a breath. "I'm sorry I ain't find Sophia. I'm sorry 'boutcher ear. I'm sorry you're hurtin' and I can't do nothin' about it, but this type'a talk ain't what's gonna help you, Harley. It's bein' strong. You gotta be stronger."
"But I ain't," I tell him, and the tears are back now, streaming down my face, 'cause I'm right. I ain't strong. "I'm just nothin'."
"You're my little girl, is whatchu are." He says sternly, voice cracking. "I love you more'un anythin'. How you think hearin' that makes me feel?"
Probably makes him see the little traces of Momma on my face. Makes him feel like he's failing the same woman twice.
But I'm just so tired, and I just don't care. "I'on care how it makes you feel, Daddy. I'on care 'bout nothin' anymore."
Being empty must be worse than being full of somethin' like anger, 'cause this is the thing that really gets to him. Under his pair of twisted brows, his sharp eyes start to well up, his mouth curls into a sneer. The crickets outside chirp happily either way, dutifully filling the silence that comes. For the first time, I think my Dad is wrong about something. There is no point in moving on. Bein' strong, that's a waste. Shane said we deserve for things to go differently, go better in some way that ain't so cruel, but it didn't. It won't.
"You're fuckin' scarin' me, Harley." He utters thinly. "You ain't never talked like this."
I know. I ain't never stayed down after a hit, but I been strong for so long, I think it's just ran out.
I don't answer him. Instead I confess quietly, "I think I wanna go sleep in somebody else's tent tonight, Dad."
I need out this stuffy tent. If I could sleep alone in a hole somewhere, I would. I'm done arguing. And he's done, too. He wordlessly slides me off his lap and helps me gather my bedding, trying his best not to tear up more than he already is, muttering to himself, swiping at his eyes. He leads me back to main camp, where all the lamps are shut off and the fire pits are smoking. The night air cools my hot, red cheeks. 
He taps his knuckles onto a crate just outside the Grimes' tent, and before he even steps back, there's shuffling inside.
The zipper peels back, revealing Lori's sleepy, moon-lit face. She takes us in with a confused look. "Daryl? What are you doing over here?"
"Listen, I'm sorry for wakin' ya." He murmurs, putting on a level voice. "Came to ask you if... Harley can bunk with you guys tonight."
"Uh, sure." She agrees kindly, encouraging me to step inside by my shoulder, taking my sleeping bag from Dad. "Everything alright?"
"No." He answers gruffly. No point in lying. He don't give up anything else, and she don't pry. He places a kiss to my hair. "Night, chicken."
"Night, Dad." I force myself to say back, 'cause I'm grateful he ain't just kept me stuck in our tent, and that he really listened.
As he gives me one last glance and then leaves, Lori zips the tent up and lays my bedding down next to hers and Rick's. Carl snoozes away in the corner, an open comic book splayed out over his chest. I bet Lori knows what's the matter with me. Rick saw that thousand-yard stare I had after they killed Shane, knows how I been hating myself. He no doubt told her everything. But she's too nice to say anything.
"Here, sweetie." She takes my lumpy pillow and sets it down. I wiggle into the sleeping bag. "Comfy?"
I give a nod, even though laying on my back feels real strange and I don't got Matilda anymore.
She smiles blearily and crawls back under the covers. "Wake me up if you need anything."
And that's that. I stare up at the sky through the Grimes' tent, counting the stars through the black mesh until I fall asleep.
Sometime during the night, I bolt awake, sweating, crying, confused. Shane, I couldn't save him. I watched him die. Again. A gunshot, blood, shouting, dying, searing pain and a dog tag dangling from a broken mirror. Darkness, and then two little hands on my shoulders, shaking me. A boyish, worried voice telling me, hey, it's just a nightmare. I cling to them. Carl. He's here. I don't think before I let him hug me. I sniffle into his neck as he pets the soft spot between my shoulder blades like his Momma and Daddy do when he's upset.
"It was him again," I shudder. "Shane. I miss him. I miss all of 'em."
Life moves on, Daddy said. But how's it that mine ain't? When's that moving part happen?
"Me, too." His arms tighten around me as much as a boy's can. "You're allowed."
After that, I remember the sound of blankets shuffling, a flashlight clicking on, a comic book being quietly read to me. I remember my eyes closing, heart slowing, and I remember thinking he's gonna be the best big brother one day. In a way, he already is.
The next morning, my eyes flutter open to the sight of a quiet, empty tent. By some miracle, I must've slept in a little. I hear the fire crackling away outside, the clinking of spoons on bowls, muffled conversation. After taking a minute to yawn and stretch, I crawl out the tent.
"Ah, there she is." As I round the camping chairs, Dale sends me a warm smile. I take the seat next to him. "Just in time for breakfast."
I glance up at the second storey of the farmhouse, imagining Beth behind one of those pretty windows. I wonder how she feels about waking up this morning. I know I'm exhausted, and all I've done is open my eyes. Another day of eating scraps, crying, and taking pills. Ironically enough, Lori interrupts my spacing out by holding out two little white capsules and a water bottle to me. She's speaking, but I'm not hearing her. I throw both pills back and wash 'em down so I don't gotta look at 'em any longer. I hate that my body can't work on its own anymore.
"Harley." Lori's voice comes quick and sharp this time, startling me. "Are you listening?"
I glare up at her. She's standing so close to me that I don't know how I couldn't hear what she said the first time. "Huh?"
She looks at me like I've done something strange. "I said, 'You can't take those on an empty stomach'. Are you hungry?"
"Oh. Yeah." Now everyone's lookin' at me like that. I reach under my hair and nervously tug on my ear as she turns and fills a bowl with the creamy soup cooking over the fire. I've never not been able to catch what someone's saying like that. She hands the food to me. "Thanks."
As conversation picks up again, I struggle to pin certain words being said, especially when they're from Andrea, who's sitting the furthest from me, and Lori, on my left. S'like half the world's gone silent, and the other half's just a high-pitch squeal. God, it's makin' me mad. I claw at my ear again, as if there's somethin' stuck in there, like a wad of earwax or a cork, but there ain't nothin' in there but the ringing.
A scary thought crosses my mind. If you can't hear for no good reason, that means you're deaf. I can't be deaf.
When Andrea looks directly at me and says something that I think's meant to be a joke, I snap back, "I can't fuckin' hear you, Andrea."
Her smile drops pretty fast, but I don't feel bad. I feel frightened. To my surprise, I don't get told by anyone to mind my language.
Lori just looks at me all pitiful-like and hesitates to guess, "Is it the ringing?" 
I'm tired of hearing about the ringing almost as much as I'm tired of hearing the ringing itself. "It ain't the damn— I just can't hear proper."
She glances side-long at Dale. "Herschel did say..."
He sighs, looking a little stressed, before scooting his chair closer to mine and clicking his fingers on my right ear. "What about that?"
It sounds like a far-away thud, thud, thud, where it should actually sound like a snap, snap, snap.
"S'dull." I mutter unconfidently. 
He moves to my left ear. This time, there isn't even any thud, thud, thud at all. It's just silence.
When I say nothing, he leans back. "I'm no doctor, but... It seems very obvious to me."
I'm not a doctor neither, and neither is Lori or T or Andrea or Carl, but it's all rather obvious to us, too. I can tell, 'cause they're all lookin' pretty uncomfortable, like this discovery has already ruined the rest of my life as I'm just sitting here. I'm losing hearing in my left ear. That's what it is. As soon as Dad mentioned my hearing to Herschel, and when it got worse at shooting practice, I was scared this would happen.
Ain't nobody shocked. I was never gonna walk away from a gunshot to the side of the head with all my hearing intact.
I guess whenever somebody talks, I'll just have to try reading their lips.
"I had a teacher who was deaf." Carl offers this up like it means anything. "She was really nice and smart. Everyone liked her."
I almost feel like scoffing at him, Wow, thanks so much, Carl. You've cured me.
"It's really nothing." Lori's quick to reassure me, covering for his shitty attempt. "Hundreds of people live like this and they still thrive."
"Hell, I think I'm going deaf sometimes, too." Dale jokes. "And I'd say I'm doing alright, wouldn't you?"
"Sure, Dale." I try to chuckle, staring down at my cold soup.
Nobody mentions the fact that having sharp senses is what keeps you alive nowadays. If a walker sneaks up on me, I won't hear it.
It's then that Dad walks into camp, looking nearly as tired as I feel. He mutters a good morning to everyone, and Lori reluctantly stands to go collect my bedding for him. I waste no time hopping out my seat and going over to hug him, locking my arms around his neck as he kneels to hold me close. I said a whole lotta things last night, and so did he, but I don't think either of us is angry at the other over it. We can read each other well enough to know. He kisses my cheek before pulling back and taking my things from Lori.
Clearing his throat like he does when he might cry, he asks me, "You sleep well, chicken?"
Instead of answering, I just hug his waist and Lori changes the subject. "Daryl, just a heads up. That thing Herschel spoke about..."
"Damn it." He sighs when what she's implying clicks. He reaches down to soothingly pet my hair. "And they still ain't back, are they?"
"No. But we both know Harley and Beth are... in some type of way. We need him."
"And y'all want me to go and fetch him, huh?" He guesses, taking a long moment to consider. Then, "Y'all be grateful you been good to me."
"Thank you, Daryl." She exclaims. "Thank you. We've always been able rely on you."
He scoffs. "Maybe not always."
"Well, enough." She smiles. "They said they were headed to a bar in town called Hatlin's. I think you'll wanna head there first."
"There even gonna be anythin' he can do?" He mumbles so I can barely make it out. "I mean, the guy ain't David Copperfield."
"Well, in the old world, I might've suggested trying out a hearing aid, but now... I'm not so sure."
He grunts. "Them things need batteries, don't they?"
"I think so, but not any standard ones we'd have. You're thinking of finding one, aren't you?"
"I'd turn the whole fuckin' country upside down to get her one, if it's what she needs." He says. "Maybe some old dead guy's wonderin' around with his. Maybe I find one in a doctor's office. Either way, ain't no bill attached to 'em these days and if there's one out there, I'll find it."
She admires the determination in his eyes, lips twitching into a smile. "Rick will help you. I know he will."
"Best I go find officer goody-two-shoes and company, then." He agrees. "Look after my girl for me."
She nods. "That goes without saying."
"I love you, baby." He tells me, which is how I know I done messed up. Takes a lot for him to randomly tell me he loves me, and I guess all that talk last night about giving up was enough. He even places another kiss to my cheek, pinching it after. "I'll see you later."
"I'm sorry, Dad." I mutter.
"I know." He understands I can't help what's happening to me, or how I feel. "I'm gonna get whatchu you need. It's gonna be alright."
I'm not quite sure what I need, but at least the adults seem to know. At least some part of me can be saved.
After he leaves to put my bedding back in our camp, I climb back into my seat and watch the blue truck bumble down the drive and eventually, through the trees. Dale encourages me to finish off my soup in that annoying way my Dad always does, but I only eat a spoonful or two before my stomach shrivels distastefully and he tells me I've tried enough for this morning, so I take to curling up and staring at the fire.
I know if Shane was alive to see what he did to me, he'd be that word Lori likes to say, appalled. He never wanted to hurt me.
A hearing aid. It's one of them things I've never had to think about until now. If I had to go back a couple months and tell seven-year-old Harley, with her long, straight hair and chubby cheeks and bright, green eyes, that I look like a boy, got half an ear, and need a hearing aid, I think she'd hit me upside the head for being a liar. But I know now that you gotta be ready for anythin', like dead people in barns and a last-minute gunshot, and now, I guess, the need for a hearing aid. I have to try squash that feeling of shame. It ain't good for me, but it's always there.
I almost make myself chuckle imagining Carl tryna make being half-deaf badass. He's so relentlessly supportive. They all are.
It's too bad, then, that I still feel this way. This numb and hollowed out, alive but-also-dead way.
The way Carol must feel, and maybe the way Dad felt after Momma died.
"Thank you." Maggie tells Lori and Jacqui in the kitchen, as I stand in front of the fireplace in the next room over. "This is nice of y'all."
I see what Glenn was talkin' about now, about Maggie's great grandfather lookin' like a bald Georgie Washington. He's sitting all proper and important-like inside a photo frame on the mantle, like all people from forever ago do. But there's also newer photos, ones with color, like Maggie and Beth as little girls, posing with horse riding trophies and smiling together at old Thanksgivings and Christmases. I feel happy just looking at them. Baby photos, kind-looking people, school photos. We never knew the Greenes before, but I feel like now I might.
"We just thought you could use some help." Lori replies. "It's been a difficult time for all of us, especially Harley and Beth."
"I appreciate it. Sharin' your supplies, that means a lot these days. You wouldn't mind helpin' me toss it all together will you?"
"Not at all." Jacqui pokes her head around the arch and calls out, "Harley, you wanna come help Maggie finish cooking?"
With a little flinch, I turn to face the three women, remembering why we came here in the first place. We had some tinned vegetables and whatever else left over from breakfast, and Lori thought we'd offer them to Maggie, who's in the middle of cooking a meal for Beth.
"I guess." I hum as I head into the kitchen. It ain't like I got anything better to do. "What're you makin'?"
"Potato soup." Maggie pulls a few bowls from the worn cabinets with a smile. "Well, veggie soup, now."
"Hopefully Beth will feel a little better after a warm breakfast." Lori muses. "It always helped me."
All their words are muffled, as if I'm underwater and they aren't, but I can still just about make out what they're saying.
When Maggie places the bowls on the counter and sees me peering over the ledge, she chuckles. "Let me grab you a stool, huh?"
She grabs a mini wooden step-ladder leaning against the pantry, pulls it open, and sets it down for me. I step onto the lowest rung. She fills a bowl with water from the faucet and slides it in front of me, instructing me to how to rinse off the fat, muddy potatoes and lay them on the dry rag afterwards. It's an easy, mindless task. I get to work while they start slicing up the vegetables and opening the tins. 
As Maggie scrapes carrot into the pot, she jokes, "I been makin' so much soup recently I think I forgot how to make anything else."
"Good thing we've taken a liking, then." Jacqui smiles. "I've never tasted a tater soup good as y'all Greenes'. You know your stuff."
Feels like I'm back at the quarry again, helping prepare our next meal from whatever scraps we had, listening to the women gossip.
"Pssh. I'm tellin' you, as kids, Beth and I loathed the day Wednesday came around and Momma'd make her famous potato soup." She scoffs, grinning at old memories. "She always put too much salt in, said it was good for us. But all it was good for was makin' us barf."
Lori makes a sassy face. "I'm taking it the recipe's been tweaked a little since then."
Maggie smirks. "Wouldn't be eatin' it if it hadn't."
"Must've been nice, growing up with food on the table that's straight from your garden."
"Yeah, it was. Fresh peaches and apples to take to school, home-made bread and the like. We've always lived this way."
"Pretty perfect, if you ask me." Jacqui agrees. "Me and my fiancé were always eatin' take away all the time. God, I miss it sometimes."
"A nice greasy burger sounds so good right now." Lori moans, like she can almost taste it. "Oh, and some curly fries on the side."
They all laugh. It's a little funny. I remember her back in the beginning, braggin' about how her family never ate fast food. Now look at her.
As the conversation drifts to more boring things, I find myself thinking about Beth again. We sure grew up different, but we got broken the same way, at the same time. We clearly been thinking about the same things. She was just brave enough to actually pick up a knife and do something about it. I wonder if she knows now her Momma and step-brother been dead a long time, that they weren't sick at all, and were just bodies needed mourning. The Greenes were a little late to that, but it's like Meemaw used to say, better late than never.
I wonder if Beth regrets what she did. She could be dead right now, in a mound of dirt right next to her Momma.
When I was littler, I used to think Dad could read my mind when I was thinkin' unsavoury things like this, and that he'd give me in trouble right away. I thought that's how it worked with adults and kids, but it ain't. I can think whatever I want and it's safe inside my head.
The potatoes get peeled and diced and thrown into the soup like everything else, and then my new job is to help wash dishes.
When we're down to the last few, Maggie says I should take the bowl of soup up to Beth, 'cause they've got this handled.
"Sure." I agree before hopping down, wondering why my heart's beating so fast all of a sudden.
The door to Beth's bedroom creaks open.
I don't bother waiting for her to give me permission to come in. I just creep in all on my own, because from what I've heard, she hasn't talked all day. Her room is exactly like I would'a guessed. Like something out a trendy teenager's magazine, with a nice white desk covered in perfume bottles and hair clips and crumpled paper and books, blonde pop star posters stuck to the walls, a fluffy, cutesy rug, a teddy bear thrown on the lounge chair sitting by the window. Even the Mp3 player Maggie was telling me about, laying forgotten on the floor.
I carefully set the hot bowl on her nightstand, but something keeps me curious, and I don't turn to leave just yet.
Beth's staring at the wall like they said. Not out the window or anything. Just at the wall. I can't imagine her humming sweetly and letting me borrow one of her shirts, giggling at something I said from the other side of the bathroom door. She looks like a totally different girl.
"I went into shock too, yesterday." I randomly muse. "Or at least that's what Rick said. He's the one with the cowboy hat."
I think I might still be in shock. I'm talking and walking around, but inside, I feel like whatever statue Beth's turned into.
"I ain't sure if anyone's told you about it, but you prolly heard the screamin'. The man my Daddy stabbed, Shane, he took me away. We got pretty far. Sometimes I think about what would'a happened if we got even further, but... he was meant to die. Some people just are."
At that, she breaks her gaze away from that spot on the wall and looks me right in the eye. "Do you think I'm one of those people?"
"I... I ain't smart enough to know." I say honestly, before an awkward pause takes over. "'Cause I was only in grade two, y'know."
Carl seemed to find that funny when I first told him, but Beth just looks uninterested.
"And you?" She hides her bandaged wrists under the covers when she catches me looking. "What're you meant for? Dyin', or somethin' else?"
"I think, um... All I'm meant for is suckin' up hurt." I confess. "Like, there's all this bad in the world, and when there's nobody left for it to go to, it goes to me. Maybe I'm just unlucky. Maybe I done somethin' wrong. That's how life is, my Daddy says. So if that's the 'something else', I think I'd rather just be the type meant for dyin'. That's what my Momma did. She was in pain, and then one day... She wasn't."
"She killed herself," Beth says as fact.
"Yeah." I mutter, feeling the weight of the locket crush down on my chest as I take a seat on the edge of the bed. "She did."
"Was she the sort meant for dyin'?"
"No. She weren't." That much, I'm sure of. "She was just meant to be my Momma."
Beth's pretty eyes gloss over as she says very dully, "Our Mom's dead, too. Right before I thought I was about to die, I imagined what she'd think of me when we'd meet in heaven. She'd be ashamed, I know. Somehow, that was so much worse than the thought of going to Hell."
"Well, maybe your God made sure you didn't die." I guess, hoping it's comforting. "Maybe he wants you to live for everybody else."
A tear beads up on her waterline before sliding down her pale cheek. "I just don't know what to do. I think I'm ashamed, too."
"My Dad says you just gotta be stronger, but I don't know how." I wish I did. "I'm sorry. I'd tell you if I did."
"It's okay." With a sniff, she sends me a tiny smile. "You know, you're kind. I can just tell."
That makes me smile back. Something about my rugged hair, my mean face, my missing ear must still be soft like it was before.
Author's Note.
Sorry for the longer than usual wait between chapters! I've been dealing with intense writer's block recently so it just took me a while to get this out, but I'm pushing through!
I hope you're ready for a familiar face to return next chapter! ;)
PS. I wanted to thank you all for the touching dms and messages I've received recently, both on here and on ao3. It's still so mind blowing to me that there are so many people out there who hold a special place in their heart for this story just like I do. I'm so grateful for you all :) 💙
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roxannarambles · 2 months
Text
Title: Wings of a Butterfly, Eye of the Tiger (Part 3)
Ship: Nemona x Juliana (Julinemo/Terajules)
Summary: Nemona and Juliana just can’t resist returning to Area Zero once more. They find new places to explore, new pokemon to discover, and a new things to learn … about pokemon battling, but also about each other. (Sequel to Picnic in Paradise)
Chapters: Part 1 Part 2
Tags: Slowburn, Romance, Friendship, Crushes, Action/Adventure, Pokemon Battles, Fakemon
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The cave you were in seemed a lot quieter than the rest of the cave system, probably because there weren’t pokemon everywhere you turned. You could hear the occasional drip of water and the distant cry of a pokemon from somewhere, but that was about it. It felt exciting and a little eerie. Hellcat set the pace, creeping forward into the dim cavern, and you both followed close behind. 
For about five minutes, your walk was uneventful. You passed by tera crystals that were growing from the ceiling and dripping water like stalactites, and followed the cave in a gradual downward slope deeper into the earth. Then you began to encounter pokemon again; only some Glimmets and Glimmora at first, until the pathway you’d been following led to a larger chamber, and then some Paradox Pokemon began to show up once more. It was nowhere near their usual numbers, though. As you passed by a Great Tusk plodding through the cave, you commented,
“It’s interesting there’s fewer pokemon back here. I wonder why. I guess because we’re so far in?”
Nemona agreed,
“Yeah, probably. Life’s a lot scarcer the deeper you go into caves or the deeper you go into the oceans.”
“Yeah, that’s true. That’s because there’s less food available, right?”
She nodded.
“Basically. I mean, most food chains have plant life at the bottom, and when there’s no sunlight, well, there’s no plants. There’s pokemon with a mineral-based diet like Carbink or Sabeleye of course, so they can live really deep in caves. But most pokemon eat other plants or animals.”
You gazed around the cave you were traversing.
“Seems like there’s no plants at all though, how do any of these guys eat?”
Nemona hummed,
“Well, there’s a few ways. Some pokemon species don’t live in caves full-time, they just roost in them or raise young there. They leave the caves at some point to eat. I think a lot of the pokemon we’ve seen probably do that since we see ‘em on the surface. Annnd, sometimes resources get washed into caves. Like those waterfalls that dump directly into here? Probably a lot of plants and fish in there. Also poop! Bacteria break it down and bug types can eat the bacteria and bigger stuff eat the bugs . . .”
You looked at her as she trailed off. She added on sheepishly,
“Sorry. Didn’t mean to ramble.”
“No, I was just thinking you really know your stuff!”
She laughed.
“Well, I’ve done a lot of reading, and I’ve listened to Jacq’s lectures for longer than you have. Gotta work hard if you wanna understand pokemon! But I’m sure you’ll pick it all up too.”
You noticed a small pod of Scream Tails ahead of you, floating in the air like weird pink balloons. When they noticed you, they turned to glare with big yellow eyes and hissed. Hellcat hissed in return at them. 
“Let’s leave ‘em alone, Hellcat,” Nemona said, trying to guide the tiger away. The fact that Paradox Pokemon seemed to all have such aggressive dispositions certainly didn’t make exploring any easier. The pod of Scream Tails broke apart, floating their separate ways, apparently unnerved by Hellcat. However, one of them remained, an especially large one.
Now that you were looking closer at it, though, it wasn’t just larger; it also seemed to have longer hair. Instead of a tuft of hair on top of the head leading into a single long ponytail, it had three of them, the tails obscuring most of its face and covering its eyes. Its ears were longer, too, more like a rabbit’s. 
“Umm, Nemona–”
“Yeah, I see it, what is that?? Is that just a Scream Tail or . . .”
The pink pokemon drifted closer, causing Hellcat to bristle and growl. 
The wild pokemon also growled– the sound much deeper than you’d expect from a pink puffball. When it did, it showed its long, sharp fangs, much bigger than a Scream Tail’s. You nervously said,
“I think the answer is definitely ‘or.’”
Nemona enthused,
“Oh man, we found something good already? We’re so lucky!”
A soft pink glow began to surround the wild pokemon, the ‘tails’ drifting upwards at the same time, revealing the huge yellow eyes beneath, pulsing with dangerous energy.
“N-nemona . . .”
“Oh right, sorry. Hellcat, Dire Claw!”
Hellcat leapt into the air, striking a vicious blow before the pokemon could use its Psychic. The pokemon took massive damage and seemed to slowly deflate like a balloon, giving a strangled cry. Nemona praised,
“Great shot, Hellcat!”
You had a pokeball handy, so you gave it a toss, seeing if the pokemon was weak enough to catch already. It clicked with no problems.
“Great shot for you too, Jules!”
“Thanks.”
You both decided to immediately send the pokemon back out so you could heal it up and inspect it more. Hellcat watched over it in case it tried to misbehave.
Leaning against the wall of the cave as she studied the floating creature, Nemona asked,
“So we agree it’s gotta be an evolved form of Scream Tail, yeah?”
You nodded.
“Probably. It’s funny this is the first we’ve seen of it though, considering Scream Tails are everywhere.”
“Well, Jigglypuff can’t evolve unless they have a Moon Stone.”
“Oh, yeah. I forgot about that. So you think these are the same?”
“Seems like there’s a good chance. Oh, and maybe there are Moon Stones deep in these caves! And that’s why we’re seeing these guys here but not elsewhere.”
“Hmm. I guess we could always try to test it on one of our own Scream Tails sometime.”
“Good idea! We’ll definitely try that out sometime.”
You spent a couple minutes instructing the new pokemon, trying to check out its movepool and abilities. It showed you Psychic and Dazzling Gleam, nothing too unexpected. 
Eventually Nemona said in an eager tone,
“You know, if it’s a new pokemon species, we’ll get to name it. Since we discovered it and all. That’s how it works, right?”
You smiled at the idea, but pointed out,
“IF it’s a new species. It’s possible Sada might have known about it already, especially if she thought to evolve a Scream Tail.”
“Aw, c’mon Jules, let a girl dream!”
You laughed.
“Okay, okay. What do you wanna call it, then?”
“Ummm . . . hmm. Well . . . I guess the name should be kinda similar since it’s an evolution . . .”
You watched the weird pink creature for a bit before suggesting,
“Maybe like, Screech Tail? Or Tails, I guess, it has three of ‘em.”
She shrugged,
“Works for me!”
You held up your pokeball and recalled the new pokemon. You answered,
“Great. At the very least, it should come in handy when we’re catching Roaring Moon.”
Nemona grinned.
“Good thinking. Okay, Hellcat, onward! To adventure!”
You both continued along the path with enthusiasm, despite the general gloomy atmosphere of the dim cavern. The trail led you deeper and deeper into the earth, growing steep and awkward to traverse before long. The ground was also slick with damp and slime; you fumbled your footing more than once, and Nemona had to catch you one of the times before you could fall on your face.
“You okay, Jules?”
She had an arm wrapped firmly around your side, her amber eyes full of concern as she gazed down into your own eyes.
You swallowed.
“Y-yeah! Fine. Thanks. It’s u-uh, it’s slippery.”
You were full of brilliant observations, as usual. Nemona let go and made sure you were steady before turning and agreeing,
“Yeah, it is getting kinda bad, plus it’s a bit dark . . . oh, I know.”
She pulled her Rotom phone out, hitting a few settings. The phone’s light switched on and it floated in the air, just above her head. 
“There we go! Should be safer now.”
You looked at the phone, surprised.
“I didn’t know they could do that.”
“Yep! If there’s one thing I hear a lot about it’s all the dang features on these phones, I can show you all the other features sometime if you want,” she chuckled. You were too distracted noticing Nemona had apparently swapped her plain black phone case out to an orange one with little pictures of Pawmi and oranges. It was very cute. 
She continued,
“Anyway, careful through this part, there’s sort of a step here.”
You made it past the steep bit just fine, but not too further along, you felt a bit off-balance again, wobbling, and started to wonder if your feet were intentionally betraying you. You swore this wasn’t on purpose–
Nemona asked,
“Whoa, is the ground moving?”
You paused, realizing it wasn’t just you; the ground really was trembling slightly. You answered,
“I think so . . .”
 As soon as you’d finished speaking, it seemed to stop, though.
“Hm.”
You both continued on, curious and cautious. It had been a while since you’d run into another pokemon, but you spotted a Brute Bonnet trundling along up ahead. Hellcat bristled at it.
The ground began to tremble again, this time accompanied by a distant rumbling sound.
“Er . . .”
The Brute Bonnet moved faster, hobbling as quickly as it could on its stubby little legs, wanting to get the heck out of there. Water fell from the ceiling in big droplets. Hellcat shook its head, flicking the water off.
“Is it an earthquake?” you asked, trying to keep the anxiety from edging into your voice. This wasn’t the best place to be during an earthquake. Nemona answered,
“I dunno, maybe? But it hasn’t . . .”
The rumbling sound came again, this time much closer. In fact, it sounded as though it was echoing through the cave itself. You quickly realized the rythmic thumping wasn’t an earthquake at all.
They were footsteps. Approaching footsteps.
“Nemona–”
Nemona squared her shoulders, calling,
“Hellcat, get ready!”
You reached for your pokeballs, ready to back her up if need be, and the pair of you waited to face whatever was coming. The vibrations rattled some smaller stalactites loose from the ceiling, the crystals dropping and splintering, and the rumbling drew closer and closer. Further ahead in the gloom of the cave, you could see small bits of yellow flashing, lights flickering along the floor of the cave in little electric ripples. 
And then you could make the creature out: just a dark figure at first, charging through the cave in your direction, although fortunately it wasn’t especially fast, just very noisy as it lumbered along. As it got closer you had the time to take note of some basic details. It was running on all fours, it was dark red with sooty black paws and legs, and it had zigzagging black stripes down its back. Its long black tail was held aloft and tipped in a jagged yellow spike in the shape of a lightning bolt; its ears were pointed and long, and it had a big spike protruding from its forehead, as well as a big ruff of spiky yellow fur around its neck. As it moved, its paws thumped heavily along the ground, leaving little ripples of electricity in its wake.
You exchanged a quick glance with Nemona.
“Is that a Raichu?” you asked, knowing it wasn’t one, but it bore a passing resemblance to one. A really big, spiky, angry one, anyway. 
“Maybe an ancient Raichu? Hellcat, get ready to use Thorn Fang!”
The tiger crouched, baring its fangs, ready for the foe lumbering towards it. The ancient Raichu gave a cry, the sound more akin to rolling thunder than the high-pitched noise from a usual Raichu. You could see its beady black eyes now as it approached, and the sharp little fangs protruding from its mouth. The ruff around its neck seemed to be charging up with energy, a dangerous yellow-orange flickering of power between the pieces of spiky fur. Something about it struck you as sort of odd, but you didn’t put it together fast enough.
Nemona, however, did. Her eyes widening, she called,
“Hellcat, wait!”
Her hand quickly moved to her belt and she spent a half-second choosing a ball, then snatched it up, throwing it. Her Great Tusk materialized right in front of Hellcat, just in time for the ancient Raichu to charge into it with an earth-shuddering crash. Electricity and flames were thrown off from the impact, crackling in the air, but Great Tusk’s body shielded you, Nemona and Hellcat from any crossfire. 
“Great Tusk, use Close Combat!”
The mammoth swung its trunk, smacking its foe across the face, then reared up, kicking at it with its hefty feet. The ancient Raichu gave a guttural cry, staggering backwards before standing up on two legs, its tail lashing back and forth, beady eyes glaring. Energy started to build around its ruff again, and you got a better look at why it seemed so strange. The yellow-orange ripples of energy flowed between the spines of fur in serpentine squiggles, and it was hard to tell if it was electricity or fire– or possibly both, as seemed to be the case. 
“Great Tusk, Knock Off!”
You silently noted that Nemona was intentionally holding back with her attacks, probably with the aim of wanting to capture this pokemon. Great Tusk whacked its foe once again with its trunk. The ancient Raichu recovered from the hit and then rushed forward, butting hard into Great Tusk with the horn on its head, sending out another mighty sputter of flames and electricity. 
“Knock Off, again!”
When Great Tusk brought its trunk down once more, it knocked its foe clean off its feet, dropping it back down to all fours. The ancient Raichu gave a rumbling cry, sounding tired. 
“Now’s our chance!” Nemona yelled, reaching for an empty pokeball from her bag. She took aim and threw it.
However, the wild pokemon was not intent on cooperating. It dodged the pokeball, then turned tail and began to run. Nemona shouted,
“Wh-uh?! It’s running? Oh no you don’t, get back here!”
Nemona quickly recalled her Great Tusk and then took off after the pokemon. It was stomping away at a pretty good pace, but Nemona was fast.
“N-nemona, wait!”
You and Hellcat chased after her. Of course, Hellcat outpaced you very quickly and then you were alone, splashing through puddles and slipping over rocks in the dim cavern, trying to keep up. You turned a bend in the path and saw the fleeing pokemon was rushing towards a round hole in the cave wall, which was encrusted in tera crystal. When it reached the hole, it got up on two legs and then jumped through, vanishing from sight.
“Hey! You’re not escaping that easily!” Nemona yelled, charging after it and jumping into the hole without hesitation, like an absolute madwoman. You could hear a startled yelp from her before she vanished from sight. You cried,
“Nemona!”
Hellcat had stopped at the hole, hesitant, but you couldn’t afford to hesitate when Nemona could be in danger. You reached the hole in the wall, finding it was a tunnel coated entirely in smooth rainbow crystal, dripping in water. You hopped up and climbed in, calling,
“Nemona?”
You tried standing, but almost immediately you felt yourself slipping on the wet crystal. Your shoes gave way and you landed on your butt– and then, to your horror, felt yourself sliding through the tunnel. You yelped and tried to stick your arms out to brace yourself, but your slide was way too rapid, and you went shooting through the tunnel on your back like some kind of terrifying water slide. You gave a prolonged shriek as the slide swooped you down in a huge drop, then swooped up again and twisted around and around. The world was spinning in sparkling rainbows, completely disorienting you.
After one final drop and swoop upwards, you felt yourself flung free from the slide, which mercifully spat you out at a speed and distance that was relatively gentle.
You landed on your stomach, colliding with something soft. 
“Ooof,” the something grunted, giving you a pretty good idea of what you’d probably landed on. You pushed your torso up with your elbows and met with Nemona’s wide, honey-amber eyes, your faces hardly more than a breath apart.
“Gkkk,” you said, the blood rushing to your face so fast you could hear it roaring in your ears. Nemona giggled. You could feel the giggle ripple through her chest and vibrate your own. 
“Hi,” she chirped. You tried to remember how your vocal chords worked. Nemona’s brows quirked up higher in amusement while you struggled, which was frankly making it worse.
“Hhhhiiii,” you finally uttered, proud to get the syllables out. You were briefly lost in the details of Nemona’s eyes, realizing her streaks of golden amber had flecks of tangerine in them. Gosh you were close. Have you ever been this close to her before? You were pretty sure you hadn’t.
“You, um, you need a minute?”
You blinked at her question, confused. The bridge of her nose and cheeks pinkened a little, highlighting her freckles all the more. Her voice was light and playful when she continued,
“‘Cause I don’t exactly mind resting here with you, but we should proooobably get up before that pokemon gets away . . .”
Your brain finally caught up with what she was saying and you squeaked, scrambling to get off your poor friend. It was an entirely graceless affair, but you finally righted yourself and helped Nemona climb to her feet as well, stammering out an excuse to her.
“S-s-sorry, I-I– ummm– I was, uh, a bit dizzy from the slip-n-slide?”
It wasn’t exactly wrong. She laughed,
“Yeah, that was a pretty wild ride, wasn’t it? I was thinking of going again–”
An awful noise interrupted her, shrieky and shrill, coming from the crystal-lined tunnel. The both of you managed to get out of the way before a bright green tiger was expelled from the slide, splatting onto the ground. Its claws were all stuck out and its fur was all frizzed up, its eyes gone huge. Nemona’s Rotom phone went shooting through the slide next, smacking lightly into Hellcat and causing the tiger to jump. The tiger grumbled and shook itself off, looking incredibly disturbed and disgusted with its experience.
“Oh, Hellcat! Aaw, you came down here for me? Are you okay?”
You watched Nemona try to comfort the tiger, feeling grateful for the distraction. Maybe your face would stop burning in like an hour. Nggh. Hellcat still refused to let Nemona actually pet it, and it withdrew to lick itself and sulk, but at least it wasn’t growling at her or anything, so it was honestly progress. Nemona seemed to recognize this fact, telling the pokemon,
“Okay, you need your space, I’ll let you recover from the scary slide. I’m sooo proud of you though Hellcat.”
She moved back over to you, looking you over carefully and asking,
“And how ‘bout you? Still dizzy or anything?”
You glanced away bashfully under her scrutiny, murmuring,
“N-no, I’m good now, I think.”
She nodded and grabbed her backpack off the ground, answering brightly,
“Great! Let’s go find that pokemon before it gets away then!”
She took off before you could respond or even think about mentioning that running ahead and leaping blindly into tunnels was maybe a bad idea. Exasperated, you shouted after her,
“Nemona!!” 
Once again you gave chase, following her down the rocky corridor. At least it wasn’t too dark in this part of the cave– if anything, it seemed even brighter, probably due to a larger number of glowing tera crystals. You were grateful when you caught up to Nemona not too far along the path ahead, having apparently cornered the weary Raichu lookalike. Honestly it was impressive how fast she’d tracked it down. She had her Great Tusk out again, but she was busy digging through her bag. When she noticed your approach, she called,
“Oh, Jules, I found them! Come quick!”
You hurried to join her, and she said,
“I’m so glad it didn’t slip away, that would have sucked. Ugh, do you know where your empty balls are, mine kinda rolled around in the chaos–”
“Got you covered,” you answered, grabbing a Dusk Ball from your bag and chucking it at the ancient Raichu. The pokemon resisted and popped out of the ball, but after a few more, the ball finally clicked shut. Nemona cheered and went to pick up the pokeball off the ground, while you tried to catch your breath and get your heartrate back under control. Chasing after Nemona was definitely an experience. 
After grabbing the ball, Nemona rushed to you with an excited gleam in her eyes, asking,
“Do you know what this means, Juliana?”
You looked at her, trying to think. After a bit you said,
“Uhmmm, that I probably should have brought more Dusk Balls with me?”
She laughed.
“Well, that too, yeah, but also, Hellcat wasn’t the only new pokemon in Area Zero! There’s more to find down here, I bet a bunch more if we keep going!”
“You think so?”
“Yeah, we’ve already found three species, there’s bound to be more, right? And none of them were mentioned in the Scarlet Book at all, or any of Sada’s notes we happened to read.”
You nodded thoughtfully.
“That’s true . . .”
Nemona pressed the Dusk Ball into your hands, gushing,
“Which means we might be the first trainers in existence to have seen and captured these pokemon!!”
You weren’t entirely convinced you two were the first, since it was always possible Sada had records about them you simply hadn’t noticed. However, it was also equally possible you were the first, and Nemona’s excitement was terribly infectious. You broke into a grin, admitting,
“That is a pretty awesome thought.”
“I know, right?? It’s so cool, I–” She squeezed her hands into excited fists and gave a giddy little giggle, then impulsively grabbed you and hugged tight, your cheeks smooshed together as she exclaimed,
“I’m so glad we got to discover them together!!”
Your skin rippled pleasantly in icy-hot goosebumps, but she released you before your brain had the chance to shut down entirely, which was probably for the best. Then she looked a little self-conscious, saying, 
“Sorry. Got a little excited there, heh.”
You hastened to reassure her.
“No, you– you have every reason to be! It is cool, I think I just have a habit of being afraid to hope for things I really want. But if we really are the first . . . that’s incredible. Like, it’s not just finding a new species, it’s finding an ancient, otherwise extinct species. Which is just nuts. And it’s honestly totally possible, since the Time Machine was transporting pokemon completely on autopilot until we finally shut it down.”
She nodded with enthusiasum. 
“Yeah, exactly! Okay, I’m glad you get it, I woulda felt weird to be the only one this psyched.”
You smiled and looked down at the pokeball in your hands.
“It’s definitely not just you. Plus, not to get too hopeful but I um, I think maybe this ancient Raichu might be pretty special? Was it just me or did it look like this guy was using electricity and fire at the same time? I dunno if that’s even possible, can pokemon moves be, like, dual-type?”
Nemona nodded again.
“I did notice that. Well, I noticed something funny at any rate. I always thought it was impossible, at school they always told us moves can only be one type. But . . . who knows? We’re in uncharted territory here, so I feel like anything’s possible, you know?”
You thought about that for a bit, rolling the pokeball in your hands. It was incredibly tempting to let the pokemon out and study it to try and learn more right then and there, because it intrigued you so much. But you also wanted to keep exploring the cave, and you knew Nemona would want to, too.
You looked at her.
“Guess we’ll find out more when we battle each other later, huh?”
She grinned.
“I like the way you think.”
You heard a quiet little chirp and glanced up, noticing Hellcat had caught back up to the two of you. Funny, you hadn’t noticed the pokemon make that kind of noise before; it seemed to be some kind of greeting. The tiger’s ears were perked and it looked at you both attentively. Nemona greeted,
“Hi Hellcat! You all dried off and ready for more exploring?”
The tiger made another quiet chirp, as if responding.
“I think they’re starting to like you, Nemona.”
“Really?” She sounded hopeful.
“Yeah. They don’t even try to bite you any more!”
She chuckled.
“Well, I guess it’s something.”
You took the opportunity to finally look around at the cave you’d ended up in, since you hadn’t really had the chance to yet in all the rush. The space was relatively narrow and cramped compared to other parts of the cave, but it was packed full of tera crystals glowing from all sides. The ground was sloped downward, the cave ahead leading ever deeper into the earth. 
“How far down do you think that tunnel brought us?”
Nemona was busy quickly re-sorting the empty pokeballs in her bag. She answered,
“No clue.”
You took a glance at your Rotom phone, but as expected, there was no service down here. Obviously. It was a good thing the caves you’d been following so far were generally one-way and not some confusing mazes, or else you’d be worried about getting lost. Getting back up that water slide tunnel would be a bit of a pain on the return trip, but you felt confident Scarlet could carry you guys up if need be.
Turning your focus back to the path ahead, you asked,
“How much deeper do you think it goes?”
Nemona zipped her bag up and slung it back over her shoulder. She smirked,
“No clue. Only one way to find out.”
You couldn’t argue with that logic. As you both began to walk again, you started to tell her,
“So, I was gonna mention, maybe next time when there’s a pokemon or a mysterious tunnel leading somewhere, you could–”
Nemona suddenly stopped, staring ahead intently.
“Wait, did you hear that?”
You frowned.
“Hear what?”
There was a very distant noise echoing in the cave, a low chattery kind of sound that could have been a pokemon cry. 
“Geez. You know, your hearing’s scary good.”
“That’s a pokemon! C’mon, let’s go see!”
Nemona started to run, but you lurched forward and grabbed her wrist before she could get away.
“Wait, wait, this is exactly what I’m talking about, Nemona!”
She turned to you, blinking.
“What?”
“You can’t just . . .” You hesitated and sighed, starting again,
“Well, you can, but I’d prefer it if you didn’t just run ahead every time there’s something going on. I get that you’re excited, but you might be charging right into danger! I was really worried when you jumped into that tunnel blindly, that could have ended up pretty badly if it had spit us out from a bit higher up!”
Nemona looked at you a moment, then slumped a little, looking guilty.
“Sorry, Jules . . . I wasn’t trying to worry you. Or, uh, do anything risky. I guess I just was really focused on not letting the pokemon get away . . .”
You smiled gently and said,
“I understand. You don’t have to feel bad about it, I just want to make sure you’re safe, you know? And also, well . . . I’d rather face things together on this adventure. We’re a team, after all.” You suddenly felt a little unsure after saying it outloud and added, “Uhm, I mean, we are, right?”
Nemona studied you a moment, a soft smile forming on her face. Then she reached out and took your hand. 
Her voice was clear and certain when she answered,
“You’re right. I’ll remember from now on.”
You returned her smile, relieved.
“O-okay! Then, um . . . let’s go see what that noise was.”
“Yeah!”
You both forged ahead, following a path that continued downward and grew more cramped the more you traveled. At several points it was necessary to squeeze past some large rocks blocking the way; it appeared as though there had been some partial cave-ins at some point in the past. It was an unnerving reminder that you were indeed beneath an enormous amount of earth and rock that could crush you like a bug if something cataclysmic occurred. Thankfully Nemona’s excitement for adventure was an easy distraction, keeping you from dwelling on such thoughts for long. Besides, your curiosity overrode the nervousness you felt. The path seemed to meander down into the earth forever, and for a long time, there was not much to see but rock, dirt and tera crystals. There was nary a wild pokemon in sight, but you kept going anyway.
Then, with very little fanfare, the tunnel you’d been following emerged into a massive space, the ceiling towering above you like an enormous vault of crystal, the path soon leading to a narrow catwalk. On either side of the catwalk was a sheer drop, the ground so far below that it was impossible to even see exactly where it ended. Huge columns of crystal jutted up from the pits, growing at random angles, like the world’s prettiest death trap. For a good thirty seconds you and Nemona just stared silently in awe, taking it all in, eyes wide. 
“I don’t know how Area Zero manages to keep getting more and more impressive,” Nemona finally said, her voice hushed, almost as if she were worried that speaking too loud would disturb the peace here. You were gazing down into the pit. 
“How does it just keep going down? I bet you’d fall into the Earth’s core if you fell down there.”
Nemona gave a nervous chuckle, taking your hand again.
“Let’s not test that theory. We’ll just take the path nice and slow, okay?”
“Yeah. That sounds good.”
Hellcat moved ahead of you both, not intimidated by the enormous drop. It quickly crossed over the catwalk, reaching a broader area beyond. You and Nemona took your time, mindful of your steps so that you wouldn’t go tripping into the blackness. The air that rose up from the pit was cool and pleasant-smelling, like musty, damp earth. When you reached the other side of the catwalk, you found Hellcat was slinking about, ears perked and nose sniffing the air. It lowered into a crouch and began to stalk forward. Nemona muttered to you,
“I think they found something.”
You both carefully followed after the tiger. Hellcat was approaching a large patch of crystals that were sprouting from the ground. The crystals grew in long and thin columns, almost resembling some kind of plant from the way they were growing, like an aloe vera or some other succulent. You couldn’t see why Hellcat found it so interesting, but as you drew closer you noticed a quiet little chattering noise emanating from the crystals. It sounded a bit like the noise Nemona had noticed earlier, in fact. Perhaps you’d finally caught up to it. 
The cry sounded vaguely familiar to you, and you were busy trying to figure out what it reminded you of when you finally caught sight of some movement: a slithering black shape, coiled among the crystals. Hellcat’s eyes narrowed to slits and it looked as though it was preparing to spring. You glanced to Nemona; it seemed she saw no reason to interfere, since Hellcat was basically doing all the work in tracking down the pokemon. You both watched and waited.
Hellcat lunged, striking at the mysterious pokemon with its claws, but the tiger’s paws impacted hard with a crystal instead of a pokemon. There was a harsh cry, raspy and aggressive, and the serpentine black shape reared upwards, a vivid, glowing stripe of orange suddenly lighting up along the length of its body; there was a flash of teeth and glaring eyes as the body swayed, and you realized the pokemon was being reflected over and over in the array of tera crystals, making it extremely difficult to tell where it actually was. 
“Uh-oh. Um, any guesses, Nemona?”
The wild pokemon hissed, and you could see a purple tongue flicking around curved, black teeth. From all the reflections, you honestly couldn’t tell how many heads the snake had, because at the moment it seemed like you were staring at a very angry hydra. 
“Uuhm, I . . . there! I think. Hellcat, Dire Claw, there!”
Hellcat lashed out where Nemona pointed, but once again was foiled by the fakes, cracking a crystal instead of hitting a pokemon. Despite that fact, the snake didn’t take kindly to the attempted attack. It opened its mouth and spat a fireball. Hellcat tried to dodge but was partly singed by the attack, and it gave an angry shriek in response. 
“Oh man. Another fire type? This just isn’t your day, Hellcat, I’m sorry,” Nemona said, looking guilty about the hit Hellcat had taken.
“Don’t worry, Nemona, I have an idea,” you said, quickly checking through your pokeballs for the right one. 
“Got it, partner. Let’s back off for now, Hellcat, let Juliana handle this one.”
You grabbed up the ball you needed from your bag and tossed it. The purple form of your Gengar took shape. The ghost looked around at the situation, curious, and then turned his eyes to you.
“Gengar! There’s some sort of . . . uhh, something in that patch of crystals. I want you to use Dazzling Gleam!”
Gengar grinned and nodded, then turned to face his foe. Nine different heads hissed at Gengar, but the ghost was not easily intimidated. He floated forward, a small light starting to build as he charged his attack. 
“Cover your eyes, Nemona!”
Gengar unleashed his move, a brilliant white light flashing, reflecting in the crystals dozens and dozens of times; you could see the incredible brightness even behind your closed eyes. The wild pokemon’s cry was loud and grating, and you got the feeling Gengar had hit it hard.
When you opened your eyes, you saw the snake spew a stream of fire in retaliation, engulfing Gengar in flames. The ghost grunted, looking charred and wounded, but stuck it out. You ordered,
“Again Gengar, Dazzling Gleam!”
Your pokemon unleashed another sparkling attack, his foe crying out in pain once more. The snake uncoiled from the tera crystal it was wrapped around and began to slither out of the patch of crystals, perhaps starting to think the better of its hiding place. As its head peeked out, you could see it much better: it had a long, toothy snout and a pair of narrow, purple eyes. The stripe of orange that ran along its body continued up back its neck and onto its head, splitting into a pattern with several prongs on the top of its head. The shape almost made it look as though it were a glowing, orange crown. 
The orange crown began to glow brighter and brighter, a sphere of orange energy forming there. The pokemon flicked its head upwards, shooting the ball of energy up into the air over your heads. Your eyes widened. You’d seen this move enough times to recognize it by now.
“Draco Meteor?! Gengar, watch out!” The orange ball of energy exploded, creating a volley of meteors that began to rain down. Neither you or Nemona had expected such a move, so Gengar wasn’t the only one trying to dodge; Hellcat, you and Nemona all scrambled to get out of the path of the meteors as well. You slipped on the ground in your haste, managing to catch yourself before crashing down too painfully. You grunted and twisted around to quickly assess the others– thankfully, it seemed there weren’t any casualties. You yelled,
“Gengar, Dazzling Gleam, one more time!”
Gengar sprang ahead, the flashes of pure fairy energy overwhelming his opponent. Despite how exhausted the snake was by now, it still managed to spit a fireball in return. Gengar trembled and then fainted, and you called,
“That’s okay Gengar, you did great!”
You returned Gengar to his ball, quickly trying to assess if the wild pokemon was catchable by now– it probably was. You reached for your bag, only to realize it had slipped off while you’d been dodging meteors. Aw, nuts. You glanced up when you heard the snake hiss again. It was slithering towards you.
“Nemo–”
“Got you covered!” she responded immediately, throwing a pokeball. The ball hit its target and shook twice, then the snake popped out again, still hissing. She yelled,
“Don’t be stubborn, get in there!” 
The second ball she tossed successfully captured, causing you to sigh in relief. 
“Thanks, Nemona.”
“Yeah, of course! Great job handling that, by the way– Dazzling Gleam was such a great idea.”
She picked the pokeball up and tried to hand it to you, but you shook your head.
“Keep it, I took the last two.”
“You sure?”
“Yep.”
“Okay! Heheh, this is gonna be so fun to use. I’m guessing it’s Fire/Dragon? I’ve never seen anything use Draco Meteor other than dragon types before, so that’s my best guess.”
You nodded.
“Yeah, seems a good bet to me. It really surprised me, though.”
“I know, right? But then again, you never know with pokemon. Especially these Paradox Pokemon, they seem to have a lot of surprises.”
That certainly was the truth. You surveyed the damage caused by the Draco Meteor. A number of impact craters in the ground but nothing too serious– no catastrophic cave-ins or anything. You were glad none of you had been struck by the attack, though. 
“Guess we should make sure to really be on our toes from now on, huh?”
She answered, “Yeah, for sure.” Then, with an excited gleam in her eyes, she turned to you and added, 
“But what I tell ya, Jules? We’re already on our third new pokemon, I knew we’d keep finding more!” 
You laughed,
“You were right. At this rate we’re gonna be able to write a sequel to the Scarlet Book.”
It was just a joke, but Nemona looked thrilled with the idea.
“Oooh, that’d be so cool! Well, La Primera would have to be okay with releasing information about Area Zero to the public first, I guess . . .”
“And that’s assuming she doesn’t kill us if we tell her that we keep coming down here.”
“Oh come on, she wouldn’t kill us! She wouldn’t be that mad . . . would she?” Nemona looked suddenly uncertain. You shrugged.
“I dunno, you know her better than I do.”
Nemona seemed to consider for a few moments, then said,
“Um, let’s keep exploring!” You didn’t have a problem with leaving thoughts of punishment for another time– you were already down here, and you were going to enjoy it to the fullest while you could. You and Nemona continued onward, mindful to check any patches of crystals from now on in case they contained any surprises. However, nothing else unexpected seemed to be lurking. There seemed to be very few pokemon in general at these depths, in fact. You passed by a few docile Carbink, then walked a path that wasn’t as narrow as earlier, but was close enough to the dizzying drop that you both continued to be careful and take your time. 
Eventually you met with another tunnel, covered in smooth tera crystal and leading ever-deeper into the earth. This one was different, though, as it was blocked by a very large collection of crystals. The crystals that composed the roadblock seemed to be denser and more opaque than the usual tera crystals. 
“Can you squeeze by?” Nemona asked, trying to see if she could wedge herself between the crystals and the tunnel. You attempted to do so on the other side, but the crystals had grown far too close, almost sealing off the tunnel entirely.
“Nah. We’ll have to use Scarlet.”
You both backed off and sent out Koraidon, then ordered a Rock Smash. Scarlet gave the crystal a good thwack with his tail, but the crystals remained solid. 
“Try again, Scarlet!”
He hit it again, but to no effect. Several more attempts, each time with increasing intensity, also ended in failure. Scarlet backed off and licked at his bruised tail, giving a little whine.
“You okay, Scarlet? Hmmph. I don’t think this crystal is gonna budge. Don’t worry, boy, I won’t make you keep trying.”
You returned him to his ball. Nemona crossed her arms, complaining,
“Well this stinks! I wonder why this crystal is so much tougher than the other ones?”
You shrugged.
“It’s pretty big. Maybe it’s older and thicker? At any rate, this might be the end of the line for us.”
She sighed sadly.
“Yeah. It’s starting to look like it.”
Your hand was still resting against the large crystal when a familiar sound echoed within the cavern: a loud, feral roar. Your eyes widened, and you both quickly turned.
Floating high in the air above the pit was a pokemon with crescent-moon shaped wings tipped in a row of feathers. Its forearms had long, sharp talons and its armored head had spiky tufts of feathers and crocodilian jaws. A pair of yellow eyes peered down at you from above.
“Roaring Moon?” Nemona whispered. You nodded silently.
That wasn’t the strangest part, though. The Roaring Moon was Terastallized, which in itself was not unusual. But it wasn’t like any Terastallization you’d ever seen. The pokemon’s body was glittering in an entire rainbow of colors, and its Tera Jewel was . . . more of a Tera crown, studded with a whole slew of shimmering hexagonal gemstones.
Hellcat bristled and growled at the pokemon while you and Nemon exchanged a look, dumbfounded.
The dragon gave another roar.
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maddiviner · 4 months
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Hey I saw your posts about the Simulation/Matrix cult. I can’t find them myself but I’m wondering if they had any opinion on being trans, since the movie was created by trans women and had references to that?
The simulation cult isn’t a cult in the traditional sense, at least not yet. 
It’s just a bunch of people who, for whatever reason, are drawn to the idea that we’re “in the Matrix” and want to spew about it. I guess in five or ten years, someone with charisma could show up and start a proper cult out of it? Thus far, it’s super toxic, but they argue too much to count as a cult, I’d say. Cults are typically more controlling. Toxic ideas? Sure. Cult? Nah, not so far.
To answer your question, though, most of the simulation conspiracy theory folks are virulent bigots, I’ve noticed, particularly with regards to LGBTQ issues. This is probably why the Wachowski sisters very rarely get mentioned. This is despite using terms like “Mr. Smith, “Matrix,” etc culled from the film the duo made.
In some cases there’s comments and posts seemingly treating the movie as some kind of documentary almost. 
Their fascination with it is very surface-level, mostly concerned with the plot rather than any symbolism or (oddly) deeper meaning. If you really look at the movie, there’s a lot to chew on, but they’re not really doing that. 
At one point, someone in the Facebook groups tried to read some of the works of Jean Baudrillard, because the Wachowskis put his book in the film. That didn’t go well because apparently Baudrillard makes no sense to them. I’m not saying I myself understand Baudrillard , but like… c’mon, if this is so important, put in some effort, people…
I’ve seen some of ‘em say that they believe the Wachowski sisters weren’t trans to begin with, but that the simulation rewrote itself and the past to “discredit” them by adding that. Others have simply claimed that The Matrix wasn’t actually made by the duo - their name was put on it for nefarious purposes, presumably, again, to “discredit” the film’s message? 
It doesn’t make a lot of sense, like most conspiracy theories. If we’re in a simulation that’s so closely-controlled, why allow the movie to be made at all? Especially if it’s supposedly so close to being a “documentary” of the truth? 
Anyways, they tend to roll their general bigotry into the simulation theory stuff, too. The programmers of the simulation, the bad guys/robots/NPCs, whatever, tend to be whoever the person feels like targeting.
One guy commented that “the LGBTQs are all Smiths cuz if you simply disagree with them, they will cancel you.” Right next to a .gif of Mr. Smith from that film made by the Wachowski sisters. This is why aliens don’t talk to us, pretty sure. 
By this, he meant that he saw LGBTQ folks as de facto NPCs, particularly the evil sort actively controlled by the programmers. He likely wouldn’t have been able to describe what he meant by “cancel” or name one genuine bad thing that’d happened for him for “disagreeing.” 
In another thread, I saw someone comment that the religion-based discussions popping up on the group “don’t really engender much good discussion.” A guy saw the word engender, I guess, and assumed it meant something to do with gender. He popped back with some business about how “…you can’t engender things! Are you TRIGGERED by that?” I think someone eventually linked him to the definition of engender. I can only assume he’s still recovering from the shame of that moment. 
A lot of these people were probably right wing to begin with, probably had a conspiracy theorist streak to begin with. But still, it reads like their personalities and political beliefs formulated around 2011-2013 and they never grew any further. I gotta say that had to have been the first time in ages I’d heard that “lol triggered” thing used non-ironically. 
So yes. The simulation theory people are massive transphobes. Are you surprised? I wasn’t.
I’m considering abandoning this little project of lurking these groups because they’re starting to affect the way the Facebook algorithm feeds the rest of my account - I’m seeing more right-wing stuff.
I recognize and ignore/block it, but it’s there and annoying, and frustrating because there’s nothing I can do besides that.
It’s not like I’m skilled enough to change anyone’s mind about these deeply-held conspiracy theories. I don’t enjoy watching online train wrecks for their own sake. I get that some people do, but it seems unhealthy.
I ended up in these groups because I have epilepsy, and references to it in the groups themselves caused them to pop up on my feed (some of them think epilepsy, specifically, is a Matrix glitch - long story). 
I might dig into my settings and see about muting these groups for a while, just to get my feed a little more clean. I’m spending less and less time on Facebook, but there’s reasons for being there, I guess.
If it were only awful people on Facebook as a whole like that, I’d be outta the site in a heartbeat, but I got buddies still on there.
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Might sound absolutely insane but I can’t get this out of my head, what does Jacob do about basic hygiene? Like I’m sure Edix takes it upon himself to groom him or something fucked up but like. What about his teeth? What would happen if he got a cavity? Fingernails? They’ve gotta be LONG and painful. Hair? Im a curly girlie and cannot imagine being separated from my emotional support hairbrush. I am so stressed for this man that it’s coming out in motherly form. What happens when his shoes/ socks wear out and he’s freezing? Or when his body shuts down from lack of protein/ only eating fruit? I want to make this man a hat and a pair of wool socks and a giant fluffy blanket :( maybe I’m reading too far into everything but I am INVESTED, sorry this is so long, thanks for writing and including so much detail!!
[leans back in my comically oversized office chair and steeples fingers]
Venandi don't actually groom each other/themselves as a means of literal bathing, it's mostly just an expression of affection (like how real cats will lick another one on the head when they cuddle), so don't worry, Edix isn't washing Jacob with his spit or anything. He gets a nice sink bath every couple of days.
The more the Venandi learn about humans during their studies, the better Edix is able to take care of Jacob. It's pretty obvious there's tons of similarities between their species, but y'know, you can't always assume with aliens, whatever he uses for mouthwash might cause his pet to vomit blood. Jacob actually takes it upon himself to chew on mint leaves in the beginning because he can't stand having a gross mouth after so long, and rinsing with water. It seems to be working fine for him, so Edix let's him continue. If he gets a cavity...sucks to suck, I guess.
Jacob already bites his fingernails as a nervous habit so there's no issue with them being too long, and even if they were, they're too tiny for Edix to do anything about them. Just let 'em break naturally. Jacob tries to brush his hair to the best of his abilities with his fingers until he gets something similar to a pick comb from Ylva since its what she uses for Mibao's textured hair, which is better than nothing.
Technically in their current story, Jacob isn't wearing any of his original clothes anymore aside from his jacket. He now wears a specially made full body suit thanks to Venandi textile technology after Ylva gave him a bath when he was first given his medicine. If that outfit gets worn out for whatever reason, another one can be printed off for him in no time.
Yeah, unfortunately, Jacob is just straight up vegetarian at this point because no fucking way is he eating any meat he can't identify as coming from earth, and that still has yet to be determined WHICH earth animal it came from. Luckily, he does slightly broaden his range to a few foreign fruits that looks appealing enough and/or are shoved into his mouth by Mibao, which contain some of the vitamins and minerals he's otherwise missing. It's not a whole lot and he's fairly underweight even for his stature as a result, but it's better than being starved entirely. Kinda. Definitely anemic and vitamin D deficient.
Poor boy only deserves the best and continually gets the worst ): Someone take this baby back home to his mama and let him have one good day. Not me though, I don't write fluff, sorry (:
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