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bbrissonn · 8 months

Text

𝐚𝐥𝐥-𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐢𝐭𝐜𝐡 - 𝐥𝐮𝐜𝐚 𝐟𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐢

summary: in which no matter how much you tried, you were never good enough for him and you decide it was time for things to get messy within the hockey team

disclaimer: english is not my first language and this is not proofread so please excuse any errors and if any words are missing add them in your head :) also this is a work of fiction, this doesn’t reflect how these boys act in real life, and it isn’t how i imagine them acting

warnings: angst, swearing , not proofread

pairing: luca fantili x reader

wc: 5.4k (including lyrics)

a/n: i gave some guys on the team a girlfriend, completely random name so don't go trying to find them lol

guts masterlist

I am light as a feather, I’m as stiff as a board

I pay attention to things that most people ignore

And I’m alright with the movies

That make jokes ‘bout senseless cruelty, that’s for sure

And I am built like a mother and a total machine

I feel for your every little issues, I know just what you mean

And I make light of the darkness

I’ve got sun in my motherfuckin’ pocket, best believe

Yeah, you know me, I

You tried, you really did. You took note of every little things he’d mention, hoping that it would be useful in the long run, hoping he’d noticed how much you cared about him. You waited and waited and waited, but it never happened. All the efforts you made to be the perfect girlfriend for him always went unnoticed, brushed to the side.

You always made sure you looked your best whenever you’d go to his game, wanting to fit the role of the stereotype hockey girlfriend, even though you were far from it. Your body wasn’t as slim and fit as the others and you didn’t have a model like face, but Luca always though you were perfect. You didn’t believe most of time, there were hundreds of girl, prettier girls, that would jump at the occasion to be his girlfriend, so why had he chosen you?

You went to every single home game, even if it’d meant you’d have to stay up late to do homework, you even went to the games at Michigan State. You were always there to support him, but he was never there for you. You knew it was hard for him to always be free, not having access to his phone for a solid three hours during the afternoon, and when he’d get back to his dorm, he’d fall asleep right away. You never really saw him much during the days, with him having all his classes in the morning, while yours were mainly in the afternoon, nights were the only time you could see each other.

Even when you spent time together, it was rarely alone. He was close to all his teammates and apparently spending all afternoon together wasn’t enough for them and they always needed to spend their nights together. You two barely ever got alone time, but you tried not to think about it too much since Luca was always more focused on you than his teammates sprawled around his shared dorm room.

His teammates liked you, you were nice to all of them the moment you met them and they could see how much Luca liked you. Some of them didn’t really understand what he saw in you, something you wish you didn’t know as you overheard them one night during a get together at the senior house.

You had been outside for a while now, talking to your mom on the phone as you walked around the small backyard of the senior house. Luca was with you for the first couple of minutes of your call, talking to your mom a bit before heading back inside and letting you have alone time with her. As you started making your way back to the backdoor, you saw a couple of figures standing there, nothing unsual. You were planning on just walking past them, smiling at them and letting them go along with their conversation until you heard your name.

“Wait, who are we talking about again?” Dylan asked the others, before taking a sip of his beer.

“Y/n.” You heard Johnny answer, and you stopped dead in your tracks. You knew you shouldn’t, it was wrong, but you couldn’t help it. They couldn’t see you since you were on the side of the porch, and no lights were they, you were like a ghost.

“Oh, yeah, totally agree with you man. Don’t get me wrong, she’d nice and all, but like she barely ever talks.” The Duke boy said, making a couple other guys agree with him.

“Exactly, what does he even see in her, anyways?” One of them said, making your smile drop.

“She’s just shy, doesn’t like big groups, that’s all. Once you get to know her, she’s always talking, it’s great ‘cause Luca leaves me alone now. She’s makes him happy, that’s all the really matters.” You recognized Adam say, making your smile grow a little. Over the last six months, you had grown quite close to your boyfriend’s little brother, and hearing him defend you warmed your heart.

“Dude, all we’re saying is he could do better.”

“Whatever, I’m going back inside.” Adam said, and soon you heard the door open and all the figures disappeared. You stood there for a while, thinking about everything that you had heard. Your feelings being hurt a little before shaking it all off and walking back inside, quickly finding your boyfriend, who was standing with his brother.

You never told Luca, or any of them that you had heard their conversation. You knew Luca would get mad at his teammates, and that was the last thing you wanted. You did realize that after that night, Adam started being even nicer to you, always telling you how happy you made your brother, and how thankful he was that you were the one making him this happy. He truly felt like your own little brother in a way.

But something in you changed that day, whenever you’d be having the smallest interaction with any of them, there would always be a voice in the back of your mind reminding you of that conversation. So, you didn’t make much effort to become good friends with any of them, clearly most of you didn’t even think you should be dating their teammate so why would they want to be friends with you?

Luca wasn’t exactly happy that you weren’t that close to anyone, but you were with Adam, so he considered it a win. He always reminded himself that just because his teammates were his best friend didn’t mean they had to be yours too, he just happy none of them hated you.

As time went by, you’d now notice some of the weird looks his teammates would give themselves whenever you’d hug Luca after their game, or when you’d be with him at a party and his arms was always around you. But you didn’t let it bother you, you were happy in your relationship, you didn’t need the opinion of other’s, and honestly, they didn’t really have a right to be judging two people for being in love with one another.

You didn’t know whether or not your boyfriend knew about how some of his best friends felt about your relationship, but you really hoped he didn’t. If he did, it would break you, that he knew what his friends were saying and thinking, but didn’t defend you like his brother had, or that he hadn’t told you about it.

That all changed one cold night in February.

You were currently standing outside of the Yost arena, Luca had texted you barely minutes before telling you to go wait outside for him. You didn’t really understand why, considering how cold it was, but you did anyways. No one else was around, all the spectators had left almost an hour ago, and all the other girlfriends were waiting inside, in the warmth of the arena.

“Hey.” You heard your boyfriends voice, making you turn around with a bright smile.

“Hi, baby. You played amazing!” You told him, rushing over to his warm body and hiding in his arms. The boy chuckled a bit before wrapping his arms around you.

“I need to talk to you about something.” He mumbled after a couple of seconds, making you pull away from his body. Your hands reached down to his arms, that had fallen from your shoulders, your mittens covered hands holding his bare ones.

“What’s up, loves?” You asked, only to be met with a sigh from him. Your smile dropped right away, what was going on?

“I need you to know that I am sorry, okay?” You nodded slightly, confused as to why he was saying that. “I think it’d be better if we weren’t together anymore.”

“What?”

“I just- I need to focus on hockey, and school.”

“Oh.” You whispered, your hands letting go of his and falling next to your body. A heavy sigh left your mouth as you tried your hardest not to cry. “O-okay.”

“So, we’re good?” His question broke you. Not you weren’t, you were far from good. The boy you had fallen in love with in early September had just broken up with you, how were you supposed to be okay with that?

“We’re good.” You lied. Luca smile brightly before giving you and small hug, and before you knew it, he was gone. You were left all alone outside in the freezing cold as he headed back to his friends, ready to enjoy their night, while you were left heartbroken.

Maybe his friends were right after all…

Forgive and I forget

I know my age and I act like it

Got what you can’t resist

I’m a perfect all-American

The next week was hell, everywhere you went, you’d see one of his teammates. It was like they had all mutually agreed to just be everywhere you were, follow you around just to make you remember every single second of every day that your relationship with Luca was over.

But clearly he hadn’t even told him, the text from Adam asking if you two had gotten into a fight since you hadn’t been to their dorm in a couple of days, and Luca was talking about everything but you. Your feelings were hurt a little, that he wasn’t even acting like your break-up fazed him at all, like everything in his life was perfect. It hurt even more that you had to be the one to break to news to his brother, scared that Adam would choose to break off all links of communication the two of you had.

Luckily for you, he didn’t, if anything, to him it just gave you an extra reason to become even closer to him. He knew how much you loved his brother and how much Luca loved you, so he truly didn’t understand why his older brother had done it in the first place. Just because you and Luca weren’t together anymore, didn’t mean you had to lose him too, were his exact words. You knew in that moment that you had a real friend in Adam, one that you wanted to keep for the rest of your life.

You hadn’t gone to any hockey game after that, no matter how much Adam begged, you weren’t ready to go back to the place where your relationship ended. But when the team had made it to the semi-finals of the big ten championship, facing off again Ohio State, you knew you had to be there. Even though you weren’t physically at the games, you were still watching from home, your heart dropping every time Luca’s name would be mentioned.

Being back felt weird, it was a place you had grown so fond off, watching your boyfriend and your so-called friends play the sports they love with each other, befriending all the other girlfriends, it was truly special. But it was so different now, you felt like you didn’t belong here anymore. Adam had tried to convince you to seat in the same seat Luca always had for you, but you didn’t want to, not wanting to face all the other girlfriends yet.

You came with your best friends, so you wouldn’t be alone, and made sure to be near the back rows, you knew the boys always liked to spot people in the crowds, and you didn’t want them to know you were here. You had made Adam promise not to tell anyone you were here, and that you’d wait for him after the game in your car all the way at the end of the parking lot. He was the only one on the team you wanted to see tonight, you came here for him and only him, and because your best friends wouldn’t shut up about going.

Unknown to you, Luca had spotted you the minute he stepped onto the ice. He hated to admit it, but his eyes still searched for you in the crowd, only he was always met with disappointment when he would not find you. Tonight was different, you were here. Part of him felt like he should be happy you were, or even sad, seeing as it was the first he’d seen you since the break-up. But he wasn’t, no he was angry. Why? He didn’t know.

After the game ended, with Adam getting two goals and two assists, your friends had gone home right away, tired from all the yelling they had done during the night. So, you waited alone in your car, making sure to park right under a street light so Adam could spot you easily, and so you could see if any weirdos were approaching.

Luca had left before his brother, Johnny and Gavin walking next to him as they walked out of Yost, and that’s when he saw your car. He knew he should’ve just ignored it, kept walking home, but he couldn’t. He knew you were here for his brother and him only, Adam had told him after Luca corned him after the warm ups. The right thing was to just leave you alone, pretend he didn’t see you, but his legs were moving faster than his brain was.

The loud knock on your window made you jump, yelping at bit at the sound. You looked to your left, only to be met with an angry Luca. You bit your lip slightly before rolling down your window enough so you two could hear each other.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” He asked. His tone was harsh and mean, something you had never heard from him before.

“I am here for Adam, so if you don’t mind, I’d like for you to step away from my car and leave me alone.” You answered him, matching his tone. If he wanted to be a bitch to you after he broke up with you, then he better be expecting the same energy back.

“You shouldn’t be here.”

“And who are you to be telling me this? Last time I checked, this is a public parking lot, so I have every right to be here.” You said, you knew that wasn’t what he meant, but you didn’t care. He had no right to walk over here, and talk to you like this.

“You know that’s not what I fucking meant.”

“Am I not allowed to cheer for my school? Is that illegal now, Luca?” You said harshly. Luca’s eyes were staring into yours, and you could tell he was holding back from yelling, which scared you a little.

“You have some nerves-”

“Oh, I have some nerves? You broke up with me, Luca, not the other way around, and your stupid if you think that’s gonna stop me from coming to see Adam play. I am not here because I wanted to see, if that’s what you’re thinking. I wouldn’t even be here if it wasn’t for Adam. So, get whatever stick you have shoved up your ass out of it and leave me alone.” You said firmly before closing your window and going back on your phone. Luca started knocking over and over on your window, but you didn’t move. You were done with this for the night. After about a minute or two, the boy ended up sending you a text, making you roll your eyes.

Luca

ur so fucking petty omg, grow the fuck up and get out of your car

You let out a scoff before turning to look at him with a ‘are you serious’ face. If you were being petty, you didn’t even know what word was describing him at the moment. Thankfully, Adam arrived and the two of them began bickering like little children until the older boy eventually walked away, not before sending you a death glare, and the younger one joined you in your car.

You started driving immediately, neither of you talked, but you feel Adam’s gaze on you every once in a while. This was exactly why you didn’t want to come to the games before, something was bound to go wrong.

“I am sorry.” He mumbled after a couple of minutes as the car was stopped at a red light. When you turned your head to look over at him, his eyes were already looking in your direction.

“It’s whatever. He’s an asshole.”

I am light as a feather, I’m as fresh as the air

Coca-Cola bottles that I only use to curl my hair

I got class and integrity

Just like a goddamn Kennedy, I swear

With love to spare, I

About a week later, you were laying in bed, your laptop on your lap as you watched the team celebrate their win. Adam had played wonderfully and you couldn’t be prouder of him. Your heart still dropped a little every time the commentators would mention Luca, and even more when they showed the boys after the game.

You knew it was wrong, you shouldn’t be thinking this way, but you couldn’t help it. He looked so good with his slightly damp hair, the wide smile on his face as he hugged all of his best friends making you smile as well. But you quickly reminded yourself of what he had done and said, making you close your laptop in a heartbeat.

You then sent a text to Adam, congratulating him for their victory before going to bed. Well, you just laid in bed in the dark, your phone’s screen being the only source of light. Adam answered you almost an hour later, thanking you and saying he’d call you the next morning. You went to sleep not too long after answering him, wishing him a good night and a safe flight home.

It was almost noon when the younger Fantili boy called you the next day, you could tell he had gone to bed very late, well early this morning. His voice was still a little stuffy like he had just woken up, making you giggle. The two of you chated for a while before he informed you the hockey team was throwing a party that was pretty much open to all students. He hadn’t invited you directly, but made sure to state very clearly that you were always welcomed if you wanted to stop by for a bit.

You almost laughed at his words, he was a little delusional if he though you’d like the spend the night with your drunk ex who’d probably be making out with a girl the whole time. He was a little sad when you told him you probably wouldn’t come, but he understood, especially after whatever Luca had said to you last week.

Weirdly enough though, as the clock hit seven at night, you were standing in your bathroom, getting ready for said party. Why? Revenge. You knew deep down what you were about to do was fucked up, but you didn’t care. They deserved it, all of them, Luca more than the other, but they still did. All those people who pretended to be your friend, only to act like you didn’t even exist the moment you and Luca broke up. Not to mention that conversation you over heard was constantly replaying in your head since your break-up. Yeah, they deserved it.

Realistically, your plan wasn’t that mean, you’d just be ruining a night celebrating a victory they had worked so hard for during the whole season. You had gotten some information through Adam that the boys always “shit talked” some of the other girlfriends, of course without mentioning what you had heard from them. Long story short, at least one of them all had a problem with someone’s girlfriend, but they never said anything to the boyfriends. Pretty fake in your opinion, because truth be told, they weren’t really brothers like they always said, they didn’t like some at least.

When you walked into the senior house, the place wasn’t that full, but this wasn’t any surprise to you considering it had started almost four hours ago already and most people had probably went home by now. Finding Adam was pretty easy, he was in the kitchen refilling his cup when you gently tapped his shoulder. A wide smile appeared on his face when his eyes met yours and his arms quickly wrapped around your waist.

“You came?” He asked surprised as the two of you pulled away and he grabbed an empty clean cup for you.

“Got a little bored, I guess.” You told him, filling your cup with water. You hadn’t came here to get drunk out of your mind like all the others here, you came here with an endgame.

“Well ‘m glad you did. I think I saw that girl you always talk about from your English class, you-”

“Cool, I’ll go find her!” You lied before walking away from him. Honestly, you didn’t really care that she was here, your eyes not bothering to find her as you walked through the house, spotting the group of girlfriends immediately. They were all chatting between them, but quickly stopped when they realized you were standing there.

“Oh, please, don’t let my presence disturb your little conversation.” You said with a smirk, only making all of them look at you with weird looks.

“What’re you doing here?” Ethan’s girlfriend, Hailey, asked. The two of you were never really close, same with Nolan’s girlfriend, Taylor.

“I just really wanted to say how it’s so cute that you’re all able to be friends with each other and like one another, unlike all the guys. Real cute.”

“The fuck does that mean?” This time it was Jacob’s girlfriend, Bianca, who spoke. You looked over at her, sending a massive grin before answering.

“I am just saying, some of them are real good at pretending to be your friends, but then go shit talk about you to each other.” You said, before showing them the text message Adam had sent you. It clearly stated that they all talked about the other guys’ girlfriends badly, but never in front of whoever they were dating. Clearly just showing that they’re “we’re brothers” thing they’d always say whenever a new girlfriend was introduced was complete bullshit.

“How do we know it’s not fake?”

“It happened to me too. Heard a couple of them talking about me outside one night. Go ask your boyfriends if you don’t believe me.” You shrugged before walking away from them. A smirk was plastered on your face as you stood outside, sipping on your water, knowing the girls were confronting the boys at the same moment.

You were standing outside for a couple of minutes before Adam joined you, giving you a stern look.

“What’d you do?”

“Nothing.” You said, your smirk only growing as you looked inside, the house now empty of all the strangers. The only people left were the players and their girlfriends, who all looked like they were not having a pleasant conversation. Well, that was until all the guys started yelling at each other.

“Y/n.” Adam mumbled sternly, making you roll your eyes.

“I just told them the truth. About how you all talk shit about them behind their backs, but then none of you have the guts to say it to each other. I mean, why would they right, you couldn’t tell me or Luca.” Suddenly, you found yourself angry at the boy in front of you. He had let both you and Luca that your couple was loved by all of them, let you believe they were all your friends. His face turned white at your words, only making you scoff.

“Y/n…”

“It’s pathetic really, all that bullshit about you guys being like brothers, but then you pull some shit like this.” You cut him off. Right as Adam was about to say something else, the sliding door behind you opened and your body was pulled inside the house.

Forgive and I forget

I know my age and I act like it

Got what you can’t resist

I’m a perfect all-American Bitch

With perfect all-American lips

And perfect all-American hips

I know my place

I know my place and this is it

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Someone asked as you now stood infront of everyone, all the guys looking at you with angry eyes, while the girls all hugged each other, some of them crying.

“I think the real question here is, what the fuck is wrong with all of you? Talk shit behind our backs and then acting like your our friends five minutes later. If you don’t like someone, don’t fucking pretend like you do and then shit talk them when they can hear you.” You spat, your eyes looking between all of them until you spotted Luca, who was standing all alone in a corner. “Hoping that your “brother’s” goes to shit ‘cause you don’t like who they’re dating. Seriously, how old are you? How insecure of yourself do you have to be to say things like this?”

The house was silent after, all the girls were nodding at your words. The boys, well at least the guilty ones, all looked at the ground, while the innocent ones looked angry and pissed, but not at you anymore, at each other.

When none of them said anything for a solid minutes, you just scoffed and made your way out of the house. You had done what you came here to do. You started walking down the sidewalk, back towards your dorm, when you heard someone call out your name. You turned around, only to see Luca chasing after you.

“I didn’t know, I swear-”

“I know you didn’t, Luca.” You cut him off with a soft smile.

“I didn’t break up with you because of them. I really like you, I really do. You’re amazing, Y/n. But, I just… I don’t want a relationship right now.” He explained, your smile turning into a sad one.

“I get it. I want you to be happy, Lu, and if that means us not being together, then I’m okay with it.” It pained you to say it, but it was true. All you wanted for the boy was to be happy, and if that meant you having to leave his life, you were okay with it.

“‘M not saying never, though. The way I feel about you, I’ve never felt this way for anyone before. Like… I don’t how to explain it-”

“Right person, wrong time?” You asked with a slight smirk on his face, making the boy in front of you smile slightly.

“Yeah.”

“Let me know whenever the right time comes, yeah?” You asked softly, the boy nodding slightly before resting his forehead against yours.

“I’m sorry about how I broke up with you, you deserved a better explanation.” He whispered, closing his eyes as he let his body relax. Your right hand moved up, cupping his cheek and you could feel him lean into your touch.

“It’s okay, Lulu.”

“But it’s not. I shouldn’t… I shouldn’t have done it that way. And I shouldn’t have came to your car and talked to you like that. I am so sorry, baby.” He said, as snow started falling from the sky. You could tell how deeply he meant his words, his voice cracking slightly.

“Hey, look at me.” You whispered, gently tapping his cheek that you were still holding. After a couple of seconds his eyes opened and stared right back at yours. “It’s okay. It’s in the past.”

“You should hate me.”

“I don’t think I could ever hate you, Luca.” You admitted, bitting your lip gently as the boy smiled down at you. “I really need to go home.”

“I’ll walk you.”

“It’s alright. I think they need you more than I do.” You said, nodding towards the senior house, making Luca sigh a bit.

“Always have to clean up your mess, don’t I?” He joked, making you giggle slightly.

“I’ll see you around, Lu.” You mumbled before pressing a kiss to his other cheek and walking away from him. The Fantili boy stood there for a bit, a smile on his face as he watched you make your way back to your dorm. Once you disappeared at the end of the street, the boy turned around and slowly started making his way back to the house.

When he walked in, all the girls were gone, and the boys were now just all yelling at each other. Some were trying to calm the tension that was rising in the room, but didn’t succeed. Only, when Luca walked in, the room went quiet and everyone looked at him. Luca’s eyes found Adam’s, and the younger boy immediately knew what had happened out there, well almost. He for sure thought they had gotten back together, but he was close enough.

“God, don’t tell me you got back with her?” Johnny said harshly, making Luca’s smile flatten as he looked over to his “best friend”.

“Why do you care? Last time I check, who I date isn’t any of your business.” Luca sassed, making his younger brother smile slightly.

“She ruined the night!” One of the guys called out, making Luca roll his eyes.

“She said the truth. Maybe if you guys hadn’t talked behind their backs, none of this would’ve happened. I’m going home.” The boy mumbled before leaving the senior household once again, Adam following behind him.

“So, are you guys back together?” The forward asked after a couple of minutes of them walking back to their dorm.

“No. But, in the future we will, I know it.”

All the time

I’m grateful all the time

I’m sexy and I’m kind

I’m pretty when I cry

Oh, all the time

I’m grateful all the time (Greatful all the fucking time)

I’m sexy and I’m kind

I’m pretty when I cry

When summer came around, you had promised both Fantili boys you’d keep close touch with them, especially Adam since he’d be heading off to Columbus next season, which pained you a little, but you were happy for him.

As the months passed by, you and Luca talked more and more every day, something Adam noticed and was quick to bring up to his brother. Luca was smiling at his phone all the time, and overall was just in a better mood than when you two had broken up. The older brother shrugged him off, claiming he was imaginating things, but they both knew it was a lie.

You were over the moon when you arrived in Michigan, only to find that both brothers were already there, and a time to meet was quickly set. During your little hang out, it was clear to Adam that you and Luca were truly meant to be together, you both had giant smiles whenever you’d be talking to the other. For a majority of the night, it was mainly just the two of you in your own little world, but Adam didn’t care, Luca was happy, you were happy, and that’s all that mattered to him.

“Don’t fuck this up, dude.” Adam whispered in his brother’s ear as the two of them hugged goodbye. Luca had admitted to him that he was planning on asking you out soon, something that almost made the younger boy scream.

“I won’t.” And he didn’t. He asked you out, again, and you said yes, again, a week later. The two of you were just hanging in your dorm, you were complaining about how much homework you already had when he just blurred the question out. You were a little shock, but quickly agreed.

When Luca told his teammates the two of you were back together, he received some questioning looks, but he just ignored them. He thought you were perfect, and that’s all that mattered to him. He didn’t care if his friends didn’t like you, he did and they’d need to learn how to deal with you being around even if they didn’t like you.

You made him happy, and that’s all they should care about.

#bri writes #guts series #luca fantilli #luca fantilli imagine #luca fantili blurb #luca fantilli x reader #luca fantilli fluff #luca fantilli angst #umich hockey #umich hockey imagine #umich hockey angst

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nervocat · 3 months

Text

“The stars look down on you as you wander with your cat guide. They want to tell you a story of theirs. Will you listen to them?”

# — Notes: I'M SO PROUD OF THIS FIC OMGG. This is my first time writing for him tho so. This is also based on Frank Sinatras song "Somethin' Stupid" hehe. (@dumbificat , @aventurintus , @rainswept ⛧ @ ing you three bc yeah :33). I've also GOTTA stop overthinking my fics bc I don't think the ending went well so now I feel the entire fic isn't good.. oops... THIS IS ALSO MY LONGEST FIC EVER BTW # — Word count: 1.1k # — Fandom: Honkai: star rail # — Cw: just a hint of angst but nothing rlly

—Somethin' Stupid

Aventurine walks around Golden Hour, that same smile of his on his face as he takes in the scenery of Penacony for who knows how many times.

“Aventurine!” he hears you call. He immediately stops and looks behind him, and seeing you running over to him makes his smile slightly more genuine.

“Why hello, [name],” he greets you as you come to a halt in front of him. You seemed out of breath, as if you had sought him out for something.

And he wonders why you, of all people in the universe, would search for him.

“I think I've got some free time, so I was wondering if you'd wanna hang out? We don't do it as much anymore,” you say after you catch your breath, though you still breathe heavily from running.

“It would seem so.. how about we go back to the good old days and gamble with each other?”

“Aventurine!” you say in a teasing, playful tone, elbowing him slightly. The blond laughs a bit.

“What? Does [name] not want to lose to me again?”

“Whatever,” you scoff playfully. “But fine, I suppose we could go do that if you want.”

You groan as you put your cards down on the table, hand in your hair. Aventurine — unsurprisingly — won again. While you guys didn't bet large amounts of money and you earned good amounts of it with your job, it still hurt to lose the money.

“Aaand I win,” he sets his cards down on the table, sitting casually in his chair as an arm is behind his head and a leg over his knee. “You’re definitely better than before though, might I say,” Aventurine adds with a cunning smile.

You look up at him as you lean back in your chair, huffing. “Really? I still lost though, of course.. don't think I'll ever win against you,” you answer, and Aventurine can't help but let a genuine smile sneak it's way onto his lips.

It has been a while of knowing each other, and while he has come to terms with liking you — liking being more like love — it was still an odd feeling for him.

Aventurine moves his hand to take a sip of his drink, as do you, and finds himself slipping up on his words — “I love you,” — is what he murmurs. He tenses and looks up to you, his pretty, mixed eyes meeting with yours as you hold your glass in your hand, lips touching the rim of the glass.

How could he have slipped up? How could he have spoiled this night with you? How could he have confessed like this in front of you, you whom he is infatuated with?

It's silent for a moment before you laugh, taking a sip of your drink. “Oh, Aventurine, you’re really saying that here?” he could tell from your eyes you didn't believe his accidental proclamation of love, maybe even despised it in the sense he's said it many other times in a not-so-serious way (that being when he still wasn't aware of his feelings for you).

Aventurine sighs, finally taking that drink he wanted and gulped the rest of it down. “Yes, you're right, how silly of me,” he plays it off, putting his glass down on the table. “Would you like to leave for tonight, mx. [name]? We could always do this another time.”

Oh how he hates knowing he had ruined the night with you by slipping up and saying somethin’ stupid.

“Yeah, I should probably get back to work anyways,” you say as you stand up, a smile creeping into your face. “But, I'll help you clean up before I go, Aven.” said man nods, his mood having turned sour because of his own words.

But oh how right those words felt to say to you, like they have to no one else before.

Aventurine looks at himself in the mirror the night after he hung out with you. His hat was discarded somewhere else and his glasses sat by the sink.

What was he doing? He was practicing words to say to you, to get his feelings across to you and to get you to know that they are, in fact, genuine words.

Aventurine thinks that he's ready to talk with you again, but decides to go off and do his own thing until you say you're ready to go out again.

He walks the streets of Golden Hour again, and he perks up at your voice. Aventurine turns around with his smile turned genuine. “[name]! If it isn't you, my dear friend,” the smell of his perfume wafts over you, though it's not too overpowering this time around.

His perfume smelt nice.. you wondered why it smelt like your favorite scent, but you let it be. “I have some free time again and was wondering if you just wanted to walk around Golden Hour? It's a nice night to do so” You ask him. Aventurine nods.

“Of course, this is your free time you're spending after all,” he answers. You smile at him and as you start walking, so you don't notice the red tint coating his cheeks, a lovestruck smile on his face.

You two walk for a while, just talking about memories or things going on in the other's life. You both were normally very busy individuals, so getting one-on-one time like this was something you both valued.

You and Aventurine, after walking for a bit, have made it to a more secluded part of Penacony, the start sky view not hindered much now with the lack of buildings around.

Aventurine looks over at you as you talk about how work was for you. He finds himself saying those words again after gaining his composure — “I love you, [name],” — and you can hear the sincerity in his voice and see it in his facial expression, it holding a fondness for you.

Aventurine believes he's said somethin’ stupid again, and he was about to switch off of the topic at your shocked face and no response until you say those words back to him.

“I love you too, Aven,” he looks back at you, his eyes widening. “I realized I might've been a bit.. rude, the last time you said you love me.”

You love him? You love him? Aventurine, who is renowned to be a cunning liar and to not be fully trusted?

Aventurines perfume comes back over your senses again and you wholeheartedly welcome it as you wait for his reply. “You.. love me?” he repeats to himself as he turns his body to you.

“Yes, Aventurine, I do love you,” you cup his cheeks in your hands and he melts at your touch.

Under the stars of the Penacony dreamscape, you two share your first kiss with one another, and when you pull away, Aventurine wraps his arm around you in a gentle, warm hug full of gratitude for giving him a chance with you.

★ — © nervocat 2024 || I appreciate any reblogs made, and pls don't repost or translate my works anywhere, ty — ✦

#🗯️ ͏ ͏͏ ͏: ͏ ͏ ͏ stars' tales ˑ ִ✷#・ nouveau livre ˎˊ˗#hsr #star rail #honkai star rail #hsr fluff #aventurine fluff #x gender neutral reader #x gn reader #hsr x gender neutral reader #hsr x gn reader #hsr x reader #honkai star rail x gender neutral reader #honkai star rail x gn reader #honkai star rail x reader #aventurine x gender neutral reader #aventurine x gn reader #aventurine x reader

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lenaisagirl · 7 months

Text

Pomni X Ragatha, but again

I've done nothing but write tadc fan fiction for like four days. I have a massive story I'm trying to work on, but I couldn't contain my feels for ragatha and pomni so... I ended up caving and writing gayer fluff to tide myself over. Posting it here in case someone likes it :3

Pomni and Ragatha sat on a small rock overlooking the cliff near the digital lake. Caine had left the characters to their own devices for a few days, and the two took to taking picnics in the forest, since they had an excess of free time. The food didn’t look great, nor taste that vibrant, but it was the company that mattered most. In the week they had known each other for, the bond formed into a fast friendship as the two became nearly inseparable.

Staring at the piece of bread in her gloved hands, Pomni looked out over the cliffside, and then to Ragatha. A picnic basket sat beside the rock, complete with red checkered lining and a few loaves of low-poly bread. Out over the cliffside the night-time half of the skybox wrapped around them, complete with hand-drawn stars and the moon that hung somewhere behind them. Secluding them was the simple forested area that made the shore of Caine’s digital lake.

“You know... I guess it isn’t too bad here.” The words came as a surprise to Ragatha. Setting down her own snack, she turned toward Pomni and raised an eyebrow.

“Really? Newbies usually hate it here.” Agreeing, Pomni nodded. Her gaze fell toward the grass as she contemplated her next words.

“Sure - I mean – I did. Still think I’d rather be out of here... But this.” To add emphasis, she gestured around the immediate area.

“This... isn’t so bad. You’re not so bad- er people here aren’t so bad - I mean!” Her tone of voice had grown significantly less anxious over the past few days. Despite her progress, the signature neuroticisms shined through. This was especially evident in her conversations with Ragatha.

“Awh – thanks, new stuff.” When Ragatha blushed, the fabric didn’t change color so much as the air around her cheeks vaguely red-shifted in color. Pomni’s blush, however, was obvious. The bright red makeup on her face shaded an ever-deepening red. Looking away from Ragatha, Pomni held the pause in the conversation for a few moments.

“Do you... think we’ll ever get out?” Kicking her feet a few times, Pomni absent-mindedly tossed her piece of bread to the ground.

“I... don’t know, Pomni. I don’t like to think about it much. You saw what happened to Kaufmo, right? That’s the terrible thing that happens when you run around chasing an impossible goal.” Rubbing the back of her head, Ragatha frowned and looked off to the side. Just thinking about the subject had a sigh escaping her lips.

“But... I can’t just give up! I mean- we can’t give up!” Pomni’s fists clenched slightly as she flashed a determined look at Ragatha. Opening her mouth and holding up a hand, Ragatha seemed just about to say something. Giving up on that, Ragatha relented with a sigh.

“Alright, new stuff. Here’s what we’ll do. You can run along all you want. I’ll be right behind you. Make sure you don’t... you know.” With emphasis to her statement, Ragatha made a circle with her finger next to her head in a universal ‘crazy’ gesture.

“R-really? You’ll help me? Just like that?” Holding her fists up to her chest in excitement, Pomni’s pinwheel eyes seemed to sparkle.

“Sure! And when you’re all tuckered out, I’ll still be here for you. Not like there’s all that much to do here anyways.” Giggling slightly after she spoke, Ragatha shrugged. Once more, the two found themselves in silence, looking out into the scribbled starscape. Over the next couple of minutes, Pomni tried desperately to get her ever racing heart under control. No matter how hard she tried though, she just couldn’t stop thinking about the girl beside her.

“Y-you really are amazing, you know?” Though it might’ve been a struggle to get the words out, she was glad she did. Ragatha needed to know how she felt. Even if she was positive about it wanting to say this, Pomni’s fast-beating heart did little to help her train of thought.

“You’re sweet too, Pomni.” In contrast to the emotional wreck of a jester, Ragatha seemed relatively calm. Her emotional calm was contagious, helping Pomni to stabilize somewhat. That’s not to say she wasn’t affected. Avoiding eye contact, the gentle red glow grew a little deeper around her cheeks. “No... Really! You talk to me about my problems, forgave me for leaving you. You’re so funny and kind and sweet and – and.” Unable to continue her sentence, she just fidgeted slightly with her hands and looked downward. Undeterred, Ragatha turned her body towards Pomni and tilted forward ever so slightly.

“I like you too, Pomni” In her voice was a genuine sincerity. Although she wasn’t entirely sure, Pomni thought she got the connotation and her body shivered with digital artifacting at the thought.

“I-I-I-I uh. You – what?” Ragatha chuckled at Pomni’s stammering. Just a bit closer now, Ragatha’s voice softened to a kind and nurturing whisper.

“Hey Pomni?”

“Y-yeah?” She whispered back, barely audible.

“Is it alright if I kiss you?”

Eyes widening, Pomni attempted to form a reply. Failing in that respect, she settled for a curt nod instead. Without another word, the two closed their eyes as Ragatha leaned in to cross the gap between their faces. Such close proximity gave Pomni tingles throughout her body as she anticipated the meeting of their bodies.

Ragatha had always felt real to Pomni. As real and warm as someone beneath a simple cloth shirt would feel. Though it might’ve been a bit weird to kiss a cloth mouth, all the same warmness and caring was behind it as any other kiss. Although it only lasted a few moments, the pure calm of the moment washed away any fears she had about the Digital Circus. Maybe she couldn’t go home, but at least she could have Ragatha. A few seconds after the kiss started, the two separated.

“C-can... Can we do that again please.” It wasn't even voluntary. The words just fell out of Pomni’s mouth in rapid succession.

“Sure, Pomni.”

#pomni x ragatha #ragatha x pomni #fan fiction #tadc #the amazing digital circus #yuri #gay #lesbian

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spidernerdsblog · 2 years

Text

morning after

A/N : It's me, hi! So I saw this scene from sex ed with otis and ruby and it made me think of peter and stark! reader. Feel free to imagine whichever peter you like. Let me know what you think. Also Happy Halloween guys!!! 🎃🕯️👻🕸️

Summary : last night after a drunk hookup you and peter aren't quite sure you used protection or not.

Pairing : Peter Parker x Stark! Reader

Warnings : 18+, SMUT, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it)

Eager hands clawed at each other's clothes as your ragged breaths mingled into a searing kiss. Like every other year the annual halloween party at the avengers compound was a blast. Everyone showed up in the most peculiar costumes you will ever see except your dad who just wore his ironman suit. ‘Why dress up when you’ve got the best costume in the whole damn world?’ was his logic.

You and Peter went to the party dressed up as elizabeth swann and captain jack sparrow from the pirates of the caribbean so it has been quite a struggle to get out of the costumes as you fall back on your bed with Peter on top of you. His kohl smudged eyes peers down at you.

“God, your eyes look so sexy.” you giggle, not to mention you both were very drunk thanks to the open bar.

“Yeah?” Amusement in his voice as you nod. “You are sexier.” he rasps, capturing your bottom lip between his teeth and tugs on it playfully. His erection presses between your thighs, wanting some friction against your throbbing clit you grind your hips against him. Peter groans as he runs his tongue down the side of your throat to your breast. The tip of his tongue circles around a hard nipple before pulling it in his warm mouth. You moan loudly, back arching off the mattress as he lets go with a wet pop and sucks on the other one. The tip of his cock lined directly to your aching hole just a little thrust and he would fill you to the brim.

“Fuck me, Pete.” your hands reach down his ass, giving them a hearty squeeze as he jolts forward.

“Just a second baby,” he bends over to grab a condom from the night stand after a bit of fumbling in his drunken stupor he was on you again. Pinning your hands beside your head he slides inside you in one single thrust.

“Fuck!” he groans, pulling back his hips and thrusting back again. Once you had adjusted he increased his pace. Your hands fly to his back as he fucked you hard and fast.

“Right there Peter, don’t stop!” your screams of pleasure urged him on and with a few more deliberate pumps of his hips you both were cumming around each other.

****

Peter’s head was pounding but there was someone who was moving around the room. It’s literally a struggle as he peeks an eye open to find you in his shirt frantically searching for something in the room. He looks at the bedside clock and it reads 6:30 in the morning.

“Mmhmmph, Y/N come back to bed it’s so early.” he pats on the empty side of the bed.

“Shut up.” you chew on the nail of your thumb picking up the costumes you had discarded all around the room.

“What are you looking for?” he sits up rubbing his eyes with the heel of his palms.

“The condom wrapper.” you reply before stopping your search and looking at Peter skeptically. “Did we use a condom last night?”

“Well yeah I guess… I mean I remember taking it out from the nightstand.” he says groggily.

“Peter Parker!” your loud incredulous voice makes Peter wince in his head splitting hangover.

“Ok! I’m sorry it’s a bit hazy for me too.” he says rubbing his temples.

“I can’t find it in the room or in the trash bin.” you slump on the bed with a worried expression.

“It isn’t that big a deal Y/N, we’ve gone bare back before a few times and we’re both clean.” he says calmly.

“It is a big deal Peter. The last mission was so hectic I wasn’t taking the pill regularly.”

“Oh.” he blinks, unable to think of any other proper response.

“I’ve to get a plan B asap.”

“Ok.” he nods sleepily.

“And you’re coming with me.” you add andPeter’s eyes widen with a mixture of surprise and panic.

“Me? But why?”

“Because you slept with me so don’t try to avoid responsibility as it is your fault we are in this situation in the first place!” you say scowling at him.

“Hey! In my defense we were both drunk and I’m not trying to avoid responsibility.” he huffs.

“Well then it's settled then you are coming with me.”

****

“Was it necessary to come this far?” He faces you standing in front of the store. You were dressed in an oversized hoodie, the hood pulled down to avoid anyone recognising you. You had also insisted that you go to the pharmacy five blocks away downtown.

“Yes absolutely,” you reply with an incredulous expression. “I can’t be seen going into the pharmacy. The papz will have a field day. Imagine the scandal, Stark heiress pregnant with a child out of wedlock in big bold letters in tomorrow’s headlines. Mom would kill me!”

“Ok.” he nods, seeing the logic in your reason. “So have you ever done this before?”

“No, what are you trying to say?” you frown at him for the way he was implying that you sleep around a lot. Peter was quick to rectify himself.

“Nothing, that came out wrong, sorry.”

“It’s fine now go and get it.” you nudged him forward.

“Me?!” his eyebrows rise to his hairline.

“Yeah if you don’t want my dad to see your face with me on the front page of a gossip magazine you better go in fast.”

“Y/NNN…” he whines, looking miserable already.

“C’mon go on, bugboy.” you pat his shoulder.

Peter huffs and hesitantly walks inside the store pushing the glass door. He wanders for a minute in between the aisles before grabbing a bottle of tums and heads towards the front of the store. The lady behind the counter gives him a small smile.

“Indigestion” he chuckles nervously, placing the bottle on the counter. “And can I get the morningafterpill, please?” he adds in a rush.

“I’m sorry?” she looks up at him in confusion.

“Themorningafterpill?” he mumbles visibly sweating as another woman hovered behind him.

“I can’t hear you.”

Peter thought he was being punished for all those months secretly dating you behind Tony’s back. “Themorningafterpill.” he tries again lowering his voice.

“Still can’t hear you.” she says now with a bored expression.

“The morning after pill.” fed up he finally says it out loud and clear and instantly wishes the earth swallowed him whole.

The lady regards him for a moment then states plainly. “I can’t sell it to you.”

“Why?” Peter looks at her with desperation but she gives him the same bored look.

“You don’t have a vagina, sir.”

When Peter walks out of the store you eagerly reach out to him.

“It’s not… it’s just tums.” showing you the bottle he informs defeatedly. “You need to buy it in person.”

“What? Why?” you demand but Peter just shrugs helplessly. “ugh! This is so embarrassing.”

“It’s not embarrassing. I mean stuff like this happens all the time. Condoms break or people forget to use them, or they just go missing. There’s nothing to be ashamed of.” He takes your hands in his and looks into your eyes intently. “I also want you to know if you are pregnant I’ll drop out of college, get a job and provide for you both.”

At that moment you feel you have filled your daily quota of emotional distress and decide to put on your big girl pants and walk inside.

“When did you last have sex?” the pharmacist asks.

“Last night. Obviously.” you answer with an annoyed look on your face.

“Did you use contraception?”

“Yes…” you start before adding “I think so.”

“Well the details are a bit hazy” Peter supplies from the back and you shoot him a withering glare. “Sorry, I’m not here.”

“When was your last period?”

“Three weeks ago.”

“Have you taken the emergency contraceptive pill before?”

“No! Why do people keep asking me that? I’m not a slut.” you snap and Peter rushes to calm you down by rubbing down your shoulders gently.

“It’s ok, baby.” he murmurs softly.

“Any drug allergies or hereditary ailments?” the lady just continues with her questions unfazed.

“No.” you say mildly irritated. “If you are done with your 20 questions, can I’ve the pill now?”

She reaches out to the shelves to grab a box and puts it in front of you. “That will be $45”

“Thank you.” you hand her the cash. “And please don’t tell anyone I was here.”

“I don’t even know who you are.”

“That’s impossible, everybody knows who I am.” you say haughtily and exit the store with Peter following behind.

You both take a quiet stroll to the central park, upon finding an empty bench you sit down on it. The leaves on the trees in the park had turned from lush green to an orangish hue giving off the perfect fall vibes as the cool autumn air hit your face.

“Here,” Peter hands a water bottle to you.

“Thanks.” you take it and pop open the pill from the wrapper to swallow it with the water.

“Y/N I’m sorry.” Peter says quietly.

“What for?” you look at him in confusion.

“For last night it was very irresponsible of me. I’m sorry I put you in this situation.” he looked so adorable with his sad brown doe eyes you had the sudden strong urge to grab his face and kiss his sadness away.

“It’s ok I’m at fault too.” you smile. “Let’s just blame it on the alcohol and call it a day, yeah?”

“Also about the thing I said in front of the store I was completely serious you know. I would’ve taken care of both of you.”

You remember the sincere look on his face when he had said that but then you had given such a look as if you don’t want to do anything with him. “I was just stressed Peter and you know I get mean when I get stressed.” you lace your hand with his resting on his knee. “And I also know you will always be by my side no matter what.”

#peter parker #peter parker smut #tasm peter parker #peter parker fluff #peter parker x reader #peter parker x you #peter parker fanfiction #spiderman fanfiction #tasm!peter parker #tasm!peter smut #tasm!peter x reader #andrew garfield #andrew garfield x reader #andrew garfield smut #andrew garfield fluff

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automaticpizzahologram · 1 year

Text

Sorry, I'm a crap writer, I didn't expect it to get as popular as it is .

If you have any ideas, feel free to say

Part 3

Bill and I have been at the park for around about an hour laughing and telling each other stories when I get a call from my mam, telling me that I need to head home. I don't really want to go as Bill and I are having a great time

" I have to go home. it's getting late, and mam wants me home." I say, looking him in the eyes, he has the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen.

"That's fine. I should head back. The others are probably wondering where i am."

We both walk out the park and down the narrow path side by side as we reach the end, Bill turns to me and gives me a piece of paper, which I assume has his number on it.

"Call me, bye,"

"Bye," we both go our separate ways, I turn my neck to look at him, a smile creeping onto my face, making my face go hot. I turn back around and practically run home feeling giddy. I don't get much attention from boys ,none, really, so it doesn't take much to fluster me. I mean, the last relationship I had doesn't even count as it was a primary school one in year 5.

Once I reach my house I open the door.

"I'm home,"

"GREAT, HAVE YOU DONE YOUR SPARXS HOMEWORK," mom shouts.

"Yeah, I did it on Wednesday,"

Huffing I run upstairs and jump straight on my bed gazing at the ceiling, I think back to the park, smiling I remember about the piece of paper. I open my phone and add him to my contacts.

'Hey,it's Y/N.' I type out as soon as I send it. I slam the phone onto my bed and walk to the other side of my room. My phone buzzes, not even 10 seconds later. Rusing back over, I pick up my phone

'Hey, miss me already?'

I blush,

'You wish hahaha'

Getting ready for bed, my phone buzzes again, picking it up it's a picture of what looks like one of Bill's friend with semi long brown hair looking at the camera with a shocked face and Bill and the others not having a clue in the background.

'Future cover of vouge'

'Ikr, all the ladies love me,I'm georg btw, iak who u are, he hasn't shut up about you lol'

'Really? '

'Yeah, ima see how long it takes for him to notice that I have his phone.'

' You do that then'

'So what do you like to do? Personally, I like to play guitar and

hang with my bros'

'Hang with my bros💀, I really like plants, and I guess I like where I work'

'Lame'

'OK, Mr., all I do is play guitar, I did that in y4'

'Ma.meh mehmeh'

'Are you seriously making fun of me over text'

' What are you gonna do about it?'

Suddenly, I get a video call, and I pick up knowing who it is.

"Well, hello, oh famous y/n."

"Hello,georg. I'm guessing they still haven't figured it out yet. "

"Yep. They're still playing uno. " The camera switches around to reveal Bill and the others in a hotel room. The camera switches back around to face Georg.

" You look like a drowned fish."

"Well, at least I don't have my pants so low, not even my belt can help,"

We bicker on for a few minutes until a shout comes from the other end of the phone

"Jeez, okay, who got your thong in a twist gustav?" Mumbled shouting, is heard until I heard a loud

"Is that my phone? Who are you talking to?"

"Yes and y/n"

'WHAT,' loud stomping is heard until it stops and the phone is wrestled out of goreg's hand and a makeup free Bill is on screen.

"Halo"

"Hey Bill, had a nice game of uno?'

His face starts to heat up a tad .

"Yes, did you miss me so much you wanted to call me?"

" Totally, yeah, it's not like a rat looking creature called me," I say, referring to goreg

" I heard that you ugly chihuahua,"

I ended up talking to the whole group until 22:30pm, we would have continued to chat if it wasn't for me needing to get to bed as i need to get to school at 7 in the morning.

My weird ass alarm wakes me up . Wanting to curl back up in bed and cry, I get up and head to the bathroom to do my morning routine.

I have to leave the house at about 6: 30 as it takes 20 minutes just to walk to the school gates. If it wasn't for my GCSES, I would have missed so many days off school just to sleep.

Munching on my toast, I walk along the extremely long path that's right next to a road to school. Music blasts in my headphones as I bop my head to the music.

Once I reach the gates, I walk around to the schools student entrance. I hate having to spend an extra 2 hours at school, but it's going to be worth it in the long run. Walking into the dining room, I see pheobe sitting at our table.

"You're here early,"

"I woke up at five and couldn't get back to sleep,"

"I don't know how you do it,"

"I can't be arsed for math at 7 in the morning,"

The school day passes by slowly, I mean, imagine being at school for 8 hours.

Once the school day ends, I finally look at my phone to find about 30 texts from an unknown number.

' nah gustav is being hella boring rn'

'I look too good rn for this'

'Do you know any good fast food here'

'Why aren't you answering? It's literally after 3 '

'Georg?'

'The one and only'

'How did you get my number'

'I have my ways'

'You took it from Bill, didn't you?'

'Totally not, anyway as I asked earlier what's good food around here'

'I dunno, domino's.?"

'OK, why so hesitant? It's not shit is it?'

'No, not really, just kinda pricey '

'Doesn't bother me, I'm rich'

'Totally'

'Bye ,Mrs kaulitz'

'GEORG'

'BRO'

'NO'

' Are you really leaving me on delivered rn-'

As soon as I get home, I run to my room to get changed into some comfortable and baggy clothes instead of this uncomfortable uniform .

Lying on my stomach, I flick through my true crime magazine until I get bored and place it to the side.

Not knowing what to do, i huff and stand up, walking out of my room and into maddies room.

"Who are we going to see next week?"

"Tokio Hotel, Tom is literally SO HOT,"

"And how old is he?"

"16"

"Your 13 maddie"

"And?"

"Oh my godddd," walking out of her room, I hear my ringtone playing from my room. Picking up the phone, I quickly check who's ringing, It's Bill"

" Hey Bill,"

"Hallo, y/n, do you wanna maybe wanna come over and watch movies and have pizza georg says that he found a good place called Domino's, and you don't have to pay"

"Sure , that'll be cool. I'll text my mom saying I'm going out,"

"Awesome, where are you? I can pick you up. "

I gave Bill my address and then ran to my desk, making sure that I looked good and applying some soap and glory mascara, then downstairs to get my shoes on. Not long later, a black SUV pulls up out on the path.

God, georg wasn't bluffing. A knock on the door pulls me out of my thoughts. I grab my keys and open the door

☆○☆○☆○☆○☆○☆○☆○☆○☆○☆○☆○☆

Thanks so much for reading. I'll get to work on the next chapter soon.

#bill kaulitz x reader #tokio hotel #georg

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candyfloss5000 · 6 months

Text

Worth the pain

Nathan Prescott x gender neutral reader

(Poorly punctuated and not proof read)

Summary: your life and Nathan's are both fucked up in different ways, but somehow your mangled and spiralling lives have intertwined. You're closer than you've ever imagined anyone could be, but you can't face the feelings that linger around you both, because you can't face loving someone again just for them to leave you to pick up the peices afterwards.

"Bite The Hand" is the song that inspired me to write this.

--------------------------------------------------

Fuck Black-shitting-well academy. The only things it's brought you is more things to tell your imaginary therapist. Like fuck you were going to see a real one. You did that along time ago and the only thing it achieved was people pitying you. You don't need strangers fucking pity for your fucked up life, you already know it's messed up beyond repair, you don't need a fucking therapist to tell you that. Everyone you've spoke about your past to has either given you a disgusted look, or fake pity.

You just want to scream out everything in your mind to someone who won't give you any expression, almost like a blank wall that you can just yell and scream and cry at. That's what Nathan Prescott has become for you and sometimes, you've been that for him as well. You can just talk and talk and talk at him and he'll just sit there, seemingly not paying attention but mentally noting every word you've said. He'll only speak when you request him to, but most of the time he doesn't say anything at all. And you return the favour by letting him vent to you and listen to all his words.

Now, you're both silently laying on Nathan's bed in his dorm, your legs up agaisnt the cushions as you lay the wrong way on the bed. You just stare at the white ceiling, passing a cigarette between each other. You forgot to buy a pack and it's Nathan's last one, so you compromised. You've remained in silence, since you entered his room ages ago, waiting for either one of you to say something.

Nathan hands you the cigarette, after he took a long drag, before breaking the some what comforting silence, "Do you ever think about..." His pause causes you to turn your head to look at him, but he's still staring up at the ceiling. "Getting the fuck outta here? Just fucking off and forgetting about all this shit?"

"Every second of every day." You reply to him, as you pass him the cigarette back.

"But there's always that nagging in the back of your head to just put up with everyone's shit." Nathan speaks for them both and you turn your head to face the ceiling again. Uncontrollable dread sits in your soul, as you try to convince yourself that your past isn't repeating itself yet again. "And it always seems to out weigh the idea of finally being free." He adds to his previous sentence. "I'm gonna get the fuck outta here one day, you know?"

Your anxious mind can't help but pick up on the fact that he said "I'm" and not "we". Has he already decided that you are only a fragment of his life? You should've known better. You told yourself when you went to Blackwell not to get attached to anyone. They'd only leave like every fucker else, you had told yourself. First, it was your mother leaving you for some drugdealing asshole, then it was your childhood friend picking some over girl for you, then your older siblings moved out far away (they still don't try to contact you), which only added to your father's alcoholism. There's always someone else that's the first choice. You gave up trying to get everybody to like you a long time ago.

During your mind's spiralling anxious thoughts, you don't even notice the tear that runs down the side of your face, until a soft hand wipes it away. The physical contact brings you back to reality and you turn your head to face Nathan, who's already looking at you. The cigarette sits in an ashtray that's ontop of his bed. Your eyes stare into his ocean blue ones and you only just realise how close you are, your faces are only a breath away from one another.

"Tell me what's going on up there." He places his hand on the side of your face and slightly taps your forehead to emphasise his words, before tucking the hair that had fallen infront of your face behind your era.

You silently study his face, his blonde soft hair, his angel eyes and your eyes finally land on his red lips. You desperately want to take the leap and kiss him until your lungs begin to burn from the lack of air. You want to hide yourself in his arms, where you're safley locked away from the world. You want him to hold you so delicately, as if you'd break like glass.

You tear your eyes away from his plush lips and sigh as you can't bring yourself to look at him anymore. "I can't keep doing this." You pathetically mutter under your breath, hating the way more salty tears push their way into your eyes.

"Doing what?" Nathan's voice has dropped to a whisper as you looks at you.

"This! I can't keep loving people who leave! I can't let more kindling be added to this burning feeling inside me!" Your voice raises, but you're not angry. You're just so tired and fucking emotionally drained. You try to ignore the never ending stream of tears that flow from your eyes. "It hurts too much and I can't do it anymore!" You subconsciously grasp his shirt, as if that's enough to stop him from disappearing.

Nathan says your name, as quite as a whisper and you just stare into his eyes. The hand on your cheek moves to lightly grasp the back of your scalp and Nathan moves forward to place his forehead agaisnt your own, in an attempt to ground you to the present. "I'm not going anywhere without you. I don't fucking care if it means we travel the entire fucking world, I'm not letting you go." He vows, with such a sincere look in his eyes, a look you've never seen anyone give you before.

Silence falls once again and you're still so close to the point where you can feel each other's breath on your faces. Neither of you can help but glance down at each other's lips. Slowly but surely, your bodies move impossibly closer and your lips dance over one another.

His touch burns and stabs into your soul, but you can't convince yourself to let him go. Nathan's here and he's staying. He's worth the pain.

#Life is strange #life is strange x reader #Nathan prescott #Nathan prescott x reader #max caulfield #Chloe price #Rachel amber #Victoria chase #warren graham #Song fic #Oneshot #Imagine #Fluff #Angst #fluff and angst #Spotify

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backslashdelta · 7 days

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Blaine-friendly Kurtbastian Fic Recs

Putting a list together for @fallevs, but I hope this will be useful for anyone who wants to dip their toes into Kurtbastian fanfiction but doesn't want to read anything anti-Blaine! Everything included in this list will either not include Blaine at all, or if he is in the fic, it will be neutral or friendly toward him.

I've tried to include a wide range of words counts as well, so that you can start with something short and sweet or dive into something big, whatever you feel like. If anyone else has some recommendations to add, please feel free to reblog this list and add more!

Europe Is Our Playground by @glitterdammerung - 53,430 words

Summary: Eight years and half the world away from home, a chance encounter in a Paris club leads Kurt and Sebastian - each running from the ghosts of their pasts - into the diversion of chasing each other across Europe.

(Let's give them) Something to talk about by MemeKonGlee - 20,529 words

Summary: “I need you to—” “I heard you the first time,” Kurt interrupts, putting his fork and knife down on his plate and pushing his half-finished pancakes aside. “What I meant was: what the hell?” He points towards the neglected pancakes, trying to stall in the face of Kurt’s reaction. “Are you sure you don’t wanna finish that first?” The look in Kurt's eyes tells him in no uncertain terms that no, he doesn't want to finish his pancakes, Jesus. And so Sebastian has no option but to take a deep breath in, exhale slowly through his mouth and just… get on with it, internally cringing at how unbelievably ridiculous it all sounds when he puts it in words, all out there for the world (and more importantly, Kurt fucking Hummel) to judge. It all boils down to: I fucked up and I'm too proud to deal with it the mature way.

Safe Mode by flipmeforward - 18,118 words

Summary: An AU in which Kurt and Sebastian never met in high school. Instead, they meet at &brave--an up-and-coming online fashion company where Kurt is the new assistant slash blogger (one day he will figure out a better title), and Sebastian is the less than pleasant tech support guy. Kurt does his best to avoid Sebastian and his rude attitude at all possible costs, but it turns out that technology is not his friend. It also turns out that Sebastian might maybe possibly be (okay, probably is) more than just an annoying coworker.

Come On And Mess Me Up by @pouralittlewater - 215,339 words

Summary: “It’s like...When Harry Met Sally,” Santana told him. “No. That was me and Blaine.” “How? You literally got together in months. You and Sebastian have been skirting the issue for years. This whole “will they, won’t they” thing is getting old.” Or, when Sebastian enrolls in McKinley High and joins Glee right before the duet competition. What Kurt thinks could be the start to a great friendship in gay camaraderie quickly explodes in his face as he realizes being around Sebastian makes him want to set the other boy on fire. However, over time, that feeling dissipates. Even without the title of friendship, the two become ingrained in each other's lives in a way neither ever expected to.

Thunderbolts & Lightning by @alphabees-writes - 1,854 words

Summary: Sebastian has a plan. It goes wrong, and then right, and then wrong again.

tension bars by @cryscendo - 824 words

Summary: Prompt by backslashdelta: kurt, sports!au (gymnastics), exes, “sometimes, i sit in bed and wonder what would happen if things were different.”

I Want The World To See You'll Be With Me by @backslashdelta (me!) - 2,405 words

Summary: Kurt and Sebastian attend a Christmas party, and Sebastian has a special surprise for Kurt afterward.

Dessert by @nalasan - 1,175 words

Summary: “Oh my God,” Sebastian says, staring at the plate in front of him. “We have to break up.” Kurt, who has just walked into their living room and is still in his winter coat, raises his eyebrow quizzically; his expression more bemused than worried, “And why is that?” “Just look at that,” Sebastian replies, gesturing at the table in front of him like he is seeing it for the first time: the white tablecloth, the candles in their silver candleholders, the white roses in their vase in the middle of the table, and the dinner Sebastian has been preparing since he came home three hours ago.

And Why Is That? by @20xbetterthanu - 41,321 words

Summary: "I love you, and I hate myself for that." "And why is that?" Love hurts.

Note from me: this fic is definitely not anti-Blaine, however it does heavily involve Blaine and he is Not having a good time, so I maybe wouldn't recommend it if you want to avoid him (and the other boys!) being sad.

A Change In The Weather by cacophonylights - 209,414 words

Summary: The summer before college Kurt is shocked when Sebastian comes to him with a timely offer he can’t refuse. He’ll get something he needs to realize his dreams, but in return he has to play the role of Sebastian’s boyfriend for the summer. Neither of them know just how much their worlds are about to change. For a GKM prompt.

Note from me: this fic COULD be considered anti-Blaine, but I don't personally consider it to be; it maybe doesn't paint him in the most positive light, but I think it's still neutral enough to be on this list, and it's essentially required reading at this point! Also, it is famously unfinished, but there are a couple fan sequels: ACITW AU by @lady-divine-writes A Drop In The Ocean by @daftydraw and jwmelmoth The ACITW link above is for livejournal, but you can also find the original fic on AO3 in two parts here and here.

#mine #fanfiction #fic rec #kurtbastian #kurtbastian fanfiction #glee #glee fanfiction #fallevs #I hope this list is helpful!!#and I would love to hear your thoughts on any of these fics (or any others you happen to find and read!)#kurt hummel #sebastian smythe #also please please please read europe is our playground #no pressure but like OMG it's so good #everything in this list is good though so. yeah.

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bookished · 1 year

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( a collection of sentence starters. adjust phrasing as necessary.) feel free to make edits to better suit your muse, but please don’t edit or add on to the original post 💛

“You call yourself hero, but you are a shadow of what you were. I called you family… yet your pride and lust for glory overshadowed your morality and virtue. Now you call me enemy with no other reason than that I stood in your way. So come on, hero! Finish your path to the throne!”

"You haven't even listened to my side of the story yet. Shall I tell you, hm?"

“Since you hate heroes... i'll become the one you’ll hate the most.”

“One more dance?” “One last dance.”

“Ah. How fun to be a liar.” “I guess that makes two of us.”

“But, why not use that power to do good?” “My dear. To do good in a world that thrives on being bad would be a terrible waste.”

“What are you doing here?” “Thought I’d join the most alluring lady in the room for a dance.” “You tried to kill me!” “Please. I’d do no such thing.” “Really? Then, care to explain when you-” His left hand had found the small of her back, just low enough to make her breath hitch and any accusations towards him die in her throat. Silence. “Hm?” He was smirking.

“You see those guards stationed at the gate? They’ve been ordered to not let you leave this room alive. I thought we’d change that.”

“In my right breast pocket is a dagger. You will take it and use it on the guard. Do you understand me?”

“I will kill every single person in this ballroom while letting your father watch, and then I’ll kill him too. No one will ever hurt you.” A pause. “Ever.”

“I always thought this dress would look better in red. Bloody red.”

“She might be mad at me for the rest of her life, but at the end of the day, I'd be the one to keep her alive.”

“To breathe or die, dance and fight, these are the concepts that run with love and war.” “Are you always this poetic?” “Not always. Only when I’m trying to woo you, my dear.”

“Was this just a ploy for me to fall for you?” “Is it working?”

“You died.” “Oh, I missed you too.”

“We shouldn't be doing this.” “Yet here we are, doing this.” “But it's not right...” “Yet you're enjoying it.”

“You know the expression, right?” “A date with destiny...” “A dance with death.”

“I’m so glad that the lack of invitation didn’t deter you from attending. What drew you to it? The opportunity of spilling blood? The publicity of assassinating the king at the most public ball of the year? Or was it to have a fair little chat with the guards?” “What do you deduce, princess? From the scene before you? Would you still say that I am the villain?”

Your old friend turned enemy joins you in a dance after recognizing you, saying, “you have always liked red.”

“Remind me again, my love; which one of us do they believe is the hero and which is the villain?” “I’m afraid I’m not quite sure, dearest. The veil between those worlds grows thinner as we grow closer. Just hold me for this one last dance and promise me that when it’s all over that you’ll never forget the way we felt in each other’s arms…”

“I’ve been waiting for this moment,” he breathed against her skin. He twirled the knife in his hand and pressed it to her pulse. She did not beg him to stop or scream at his betrayal.

“My sweet, I do not want to destroy the world. I merely want you to stop wasting such a beautiful mind, body and soul trying to save it.”

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fuckyeah-beringandwellsfics · 7 months

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🎃 13 👻 spooky 🧛🏻 Bering and Wells 🧟 fic 🩸 recs! ☠️

Here is a list (under the readmore, ordered from short to long) of spooky and/or Halloween-themed fics: short ones and long ones, AUs and casefics, something for everyone! Feel free to add your favorites in reblogs or replies!

Bite Me (858 words) by @tigerkid14 Chapters: 1/1 Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Summary: Kinktober 2017 prompt: biting; Myka and Helena were apparently affected by a copy of Bram Stoker's Dracula and have a chat in the aftermath.

I have wanted to know you, lover of books (1463 words) by @purlturtle Chapters: 1/1 Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence Summary: Honestly I love the "I didn't know where else to go" trope, and this morning I had an undeniable inspiration - I've teased vampire!Helena before, but this is a different vampire!Helena. Then again, can there ever be enough vampire!Helenas? No there can't, so here we go. (also available as a podfic!)

Halloween (1493 words) by @madronash Chapters: 1/1 Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Summary: Created for Bering and Wells Appreciation Week 2022, Day Three: Special Occasions/Holidays/etc. Could also be called Fright Night: Fake Blood

Dreadful Tower (2042 words) by @nerdsbianhokie Chapters: 1/1 Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Summary: Half-living animatronics, a fear of drowning, and a Jenga tower. A fun night off for the Warehouse agents.

I Ain't Afraid of No… Artifact? (5298 words) by @amtrak12 Chapters: 1/4 Rating: General Audiences Summary: The Ghostbusters meets the Warehouse 13 team! or Three Times it was an artifact and One Time it was actually a ghost. Includes background Toltzmann and Erin cluelessly being really gay for Myka.

Dawn of the Dragonborn: Heart of a Hero, Heart of a Predator, Heart of Dovahkiin (8907 words) by @tryingthisfangirlthing Chapters: 5/? Rating: Explicit Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence Summary: A vampire. A Dragonborn. Two women, a little in love. Coffee? Mead? Or maybe save the world… M'aiq'a is an investigative agent for the Penitus Oculatus, the Emperor's personal bodyguard, sent to Skyrim to try and figure out what's behind these damned vampire attacks that killed her foster brother. Hlenea, clutching an ancient scroll and beset by gargoyles, is the woman she quite literally unearths, sought after by vampires and hunters alike. 'Beware of becoming the very thing you despise' has never been more true. Never mind falling for one… But centuries of unlife make for layers of secrets, and trust is hard to come by. The world is running out of time, and they will both have larger roles to play than either of them ever wanted…

Nightmare Warehouse (11709 words) by @anandabrat and @starshipblueberry Chapters: 14/14 Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Summary: Once upon a time, like two weeks ago, starshipblueberry said I’ve got this idea about Nightmare Before Christmas and Bering and Wells, and I said, “That’s a fabulous idea. Can we Good Omens it?” So we wrote in patchwork, one day each trading off. We weren’t supposed to peek. It was supposed to be like Christmas. That didn’t even last a day. We texted each other back and forth for hours. We left each other breadcrumb trails to follow or ignore. We thought we had the ending sorted out like five different times before we actually wrote it.

Transient (38674 words) by @tantedrago Chapters: 14/14 Rating: Mature Warnings: Major Character Death Summary: AU: H.G. Wells wakes up in a house without knowing who she is. Slowly, she realises that people can't see her and don't react to her: Helena is a ghost. The literature professor Myka Bering buys her house. As the American moves in, HG slowly falls in love with her. But there is still this problem with her being dead and unnoticable to other people. But with Miss Bering, something is different.

Aye, Zombie (57793 words) by @ifourmindbeso Chapters: 13/13 Rating: Mature Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con Summary: Bering and Wells Zombie AU. Set in Northern Ireland during the Troubles, but in another universe where the Good Friday agreement never happened. What if Myka was the former villain? This is the result of a particularly vivid dream of mine, which may or may not have been aided by large doses of (prescribed) painkillers. So if it reads like a bad trip…that’s why. Trigger warnings for pretty much everything you can imagine - violence, assault. Also, lots of swearing.

What Goes Around Comes Around (That Halloween Story) (61467 words) by @purlturtle Chapters: 13/13 Rating: General Audiences Summary: Myka rolled her eyes at him – but she couldn’t be mad at him for long. Steve was way too good a friend to begrudge a bit of teasing. “Shut up,” she said, but her heart wasn’t in it. “You did save the damsel in distress. And her baby.” “Shut up,” Myka repeated, this time with a bit more oomph behind it. “There are worse meet-cutes, you know. Wait till Claudia hears of this; she’ll heart-eye all over it.” “Shut up!” Myka laughed.

The Courtship of Christina's Mother (73987 words) by @jdaydreamer3 Chapters: 5/5 Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Summary: Myka Bering is content with her life as it is. A well-respected architect of a flourishing business. She doesn't have time for love. Or so she thought. Then fate steps in and knocks on her door in the form of Helena Wells and her daughter Christina. Love is inevitable.

Illustrated Misdeeds (99633 words) by Felix_27 Chapters: 18/18 Rating: Not Rated Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Summary: Post Season 5. Myka, Pete and Helena have been reunited for their first mission in some time. Tension is a little high as the artifact chase has them following a familiar traveling carnival that has desires of its own with horrible consequences.

Death, or something like it (104700 words) by @ifourmindbeso Chapters: 26/26 Rating: Mature Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence Summary: Sheriff Myka Bering lives in a small town in Mississippi. Children are dying in the most horrible way possible, and she has no idea why - until she meets the vampire. The vampire who senses something different about Myka. Suddenly, nothing in Myka's life makes sense, and she faces a battle to save her town from a wave of darkness - from both within and without.

#bering and wells #bering & wells #warehouse 13 #wh13 #w13 #myka bering #helena g wells #helena wells #2023 #october 2023 #spooktober #halloween fic recs #spooky fic recs #halloween #zombies vampires and werewolves oh my

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destinedfordiaperstories · 2 months

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Sammy's Little Problem, Chapter 16

Read Chapter Fifteen here.

Alyssa smiled. They were making progress. At least Sammy decided on the rest of her diapers without much more of a fuss. Still, there were plenty more opportunities for meltdowns ahead.

It wasn’t easy, but Sammy managed to pick out her daytime, nighttime, and swim diapers without feeling horrible. Even when she looked at the nighttime diaper samples, which she swore were twice as thick as the daytime diapers. But she found some cute—and she hated that she thought they were cute—pink ones that had a different Disney Princess on each one.

Choosing swim diapers felt even more strange. The thought of needing diapers even to swim made her blush harder than she anticipated. Another thing to worry about. And how she could hide those poofy diapers under her swimsuit was something she wouldn’t let herself dwell on. That’s future Sammy’s problem, she said to herself.

Sammy had to distract herself from watching Allie scan all the diapers, though. She kept scanning and scanning. The number of diapers piling up. And she would go through every single one, whether she wanted to or not.

She still wasn’t used to the idea she’d be in diapers every day for the rest of her life. Knowing that her last diaper-free day was behind her. That she would never use the toilet again. The toilet would become nothing more than an ornament, a memorial in the bathroom. Everything will end up in the seemingly endless supply of diapers Allie was scanning.

Sammy was startled back to reality. She felt Allie’s hand reach under her skirt, checking her diaper. It was done so casually, so mechanically that Sammy felt even more infantile. Apparently, Allie decided that she’d check her diapers the same way as any other toddler.

“You’re a little wet, Sammy,” Allie said matter-of-factly, “but I think you can go another hour or so.”

“Okay,” Sammy responded meekly.

“Now, there’s a few more things we need in the L1/L2 combined section before we move on. Sippy cups and bottles are the next aisle over, then—”

“Alyssa? I thought I recognized you!” A woman interjected, happy to see Alyssa.

“Oh, wow, hi Linda, it’s great to see you,” Alyssa responds, “didn’t expect to run into you in the diaper aisle!”

Linda was one of the few women that matched Alyssa in height. Her smile was contagious. She seemed every bit as warm and comforting as Alyssa. Standing next to her was a shy girl who looked to be a few years older than Sammy. She was dressed a bit more…mature than Sammy, though still obviously looking every bit like a Little. Sammy could detect no diaper bulge, though.

“Yeah, Emily here has been having a bit of a problem staying dry during naptime at preschool. Her pull-ups aren’t cutting it anymore, so her teacher recommended she bring some diapers until she gets it under control.”

Emily’s face flushed red. Unlike Sammy, she clearly never expected to be in diapers. She looked at Sammy, almost daring her to say something. Sammy offered her a sympathetic smile.

“But enough about me, Allie, you didn’t tell me you adopted a Little! That’s so exciting! I’ve been wondering when it would happen!”

“It only happened a few days ago! This is Sammy, my Little.”

Linda beamed at Sammy. “Hi, Sammy! It’s nice to meet you! You’re a lucky girl, Allie is probably the best person I’ve ever met!”

Sammy stood there, embarrassed. “T-thank you,” Sammy mumbled, “it’s nice to meet you.”

“Sammy is my little sister Lindsay’s best friend. You met her a few times when we were at USC. She took her classification results pretty hard. She’s an L2, but I knew I couldn’t let her go to an adoption center. I’ve known her too long to let that happen.”

Emily gave Sammy a piteous look upon hearing Sammy was an L2.

“Well, I’m happy to hear that! I know it can be hard at first, Sammy, but you are in great hands,” Linda says before turning to Emily, “this is my Little, Emily. She’s an L3.”

“Hi Sammy,” Emily adds.

“Nice to meet you,” Sammy says, trying to sound as mature as possible.

“Well, I hate to run, Allie, but we need to run, I need to drop Emily off with her diapers before I rush to work,” Linda said, “but we should schedule a playdate soon so we can catch up!”

“That would be great!” Allie agrees, “it’s been way too long. I’ll call you soon to set something up!”

Moments later, Allie and Sammy are alone again. Sammy was still recovering, she’d never met another Little in person. Seeing an L3 made her jealous, if she had to be Little, why couldn’t she have been an L3?

“Linda is so sweet,” Allie says, “she was one of my best friends when I was at USC. I don’t know why we lost touch…but, anyway, where were we?”

Sammy didn’t want to be the one who reminded Allie about her sippy cups. So she just shot Allie an innocent look of uncertainty.

“Oh, that’s right! We need to get you some bottles and sippy cups!”

“Do I really need bottles, Allie? Or sippy cups? I’m not a baby and I can drink without spilling.”

“You’re not the one who will have to clean up the spills, Sammy. And besides, won’t it just be easier not having to worry about spilling?”

Sammy was willing to concede the sippy cups, but not the bottles. “I guess so, Allie, but do I really need a baby bottles?”

“You don’t need to use them all the time, Sammy, but I’m sure every once in a while it will be easier for you. Especially when you’re really tired. I’ll only get a few and we can figure it out as we go.”

“Fine,” Sammy whimpers.

“Oh, look at these Sammy!” Allie exclaims, pointing to a set of cups, “these match your diapers! Look they all have princesses on them!”

Sammy wasn’t sure about this new Disney Princess motif. Sure, she loved them growing up, but to go back to them like this wasn’t what she ever expected. “Those are fine,” Sammy says.

They move to the next aisle. A whole row dedicated to pacifiers. A seemingly endless supply of colors, variations, and sizes. Just looking at them filled Sammy with emotion.

“Okay, Sammy, try not to get overwhelmed with choices,” Allie says, mistaking the look on Sammy’s face.

Sammy’s eye’s begin to tear up again. Pacifiers were for babies. Not her.

Alyssa realizes in the nick of time what Sammy was thinking. She found a cute pink pacifier, scanned it, and opened the packaging. Before Sammy could react, she placed it in her mouth.

The foreign object startled Sammy. But to her surprise, before she could spit it out or yell at Allie, her mouth started sucking on the nipple. It was…calming. Her mind wanted to reject it, but couldn’t. No, this was okay.

Alyssa smiled as she watched Sammy accept it. She’d been waiting for this moment since she asked Sammy to be her Little. Nothing soothes a tantruming Little faster than her pacifier.

“How do you like it, Sammy?” she coos.

It took a few seconds for Sammy to respond. “ith nithe I gueth,” Sammy said clumsily, not used to talking with it in her mouth.

“Well I think you look so cute,” Allie laughs, “now can we choose some pacifiers?”

Even Sammy was startled how much her pacifier calmed her. She almost didn’t even care how she looked. A few minutes later, Sammy had picked out a collection of them. As they moved to the next aisle, she didn’t even think about taking it out.

The next section was changing tables. Alyssa didn’t bother asking Sammy her input for this. She looked at each one in detail, deciding which one fit her needs best. Each of them looked the exact same to Sammy, but Alyssa looked at each like it was completely different. Finally, Alyssa looked satisfied and scanned the one she wanted.

They reached the changing table pad section. Alyssa had Sammy lay on each one, asking her which one felt the most comfortable. “Make sure you choose a comfortable one, Sammy, You’ll be spending a good amount of time on it!”

Once Sammy chose, they went to the bedding section. Sammy’s heart sank when she saw most of the selection was cribs. “Do I really need a crib, Allie?”

“Well, that depends, honey. If I catching you sneaking out of bed too often, yes. But for now I think we can settle on a hybrid bed. The ones over there have much smaller railings to keep you from falling out of bed. But if necessary, it can convert into a crib.”

The process went remarkably similar to the changing table. Alyssa looked at each model in detail, ultimately choosing without Sammy’s input. Sammy, however, got to choose her own mattress.

“We’re making great time!” Alyssa grinned, “you’re doing such a good job, Sammy. I’m proud of you!”

“Thankth,” Sammy responded, blushing at the realization she’s had her pacifier in the whole time.

Sammy watched Alyssa as she fumbled with something in the cart. She saw a flash of something pink before Alyssa turned around and walked over to her. Alyssa was checking her diaper before she could react.

“Wow, Sammy, you really soaked this, I’m glad I checked! We need to get you changed really quick.”

Without warning, Alyssa picked Sammy up and carefully placed her in the cart, making sure Sammy’s feet went through each opening. Sammy felt her diaper squish as she was placed down. She didn’t remember having a single accident.

Though that was the least of Sammy’s concerns. Being picked up without any warning made her feel so tiny. Especially now, as she was essentially face to face with Alyssa pushing the cart. She looked down, realizing her swollen diaper was on full display, her skirt unable to cover the diaper.

“Sorry, Sweetie, but it was just easier this way.”

As Sammy was pushed to the back of the store, she tried to ignore the smiles of other Caregivers as they saw her, eyes always drifting down to her diaper. There were the “awws” and “she’s so cute!” every time she passed anyone.

Finally, they reached the changing area. The women’s bathroom had a series of changing tables. Alyssa swung the diaper bag on her shoulder before picking Sammy up, laying her down next to another Little. The Little showed no sign of reaction, nor said anything in return to her Caregiver’s questions. Sammy assumed she must be an L1. The Caregiver gave Sammy a wave.

As she watched, Sammy felt the tabs being ripped from her diaper. She suddenly felt embarrassed again, sucking on her pacifier harder than ever. To her horror, Sammy realized Alyssa had picked out a nighttime diaper for Sammy. It’s size was immediately apparent as Alyssa fluffed it.

Alyssa noticed Sammy’s apprehension. “I know it’s a nighttime diaper, Sammy, but we have to go look at clothes and car seats next, and I want to make sure everything we choose one that fits all your diapers, okay?”

Sammy didn’t want to wear it but wanted to get out of this changing room as soon as possible. Public diaper changes were always so embarrassing. She just nods silently.

As the diaper is pulled up to her stomach, Sammy realizes just how much thicker it actually was. Even dry it felt thicker than the soggy diaper she was just changed out of.

“There, all done, Sammy,” Allie bubbled, picking Sammy up and putting her down.

Sammy realizes how much harder it is to walk like this. She couldn’t put her legs together even if she wanted to. The diaper was clearly visible below her skirt. Sammy can only imagine how she looks right now, standing there in a diaper her clothes do nothing to hide, a pacifier that matches her diaper in her mouth.

She doesn’t think it could get any worse until she tries to take a step. She started waddling like a baby taking their first ever steps, unsteady on their feet.

“Okay, Sammy, you ready?”

Go to Chapter 17.

#ab/dl babygirl #ab/dl community #cg/l #cg/l little #cg/l community #cg/l lifestyle #sammyslittleproblem #diaper community #ab/dl fiction #ab/dl lifestyle

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henrysglock · 5 months

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"I Have Nightmares—" "That's Not A Sin." "Yeah, Except I'm Pretty Sure I Can Actually Make Them Come True."

Okay. This is about to get real shrimpy, because I'm relying on mid-quality video for mid quality pictures...so you guys just have to work with me.

I think this sequence is almost entirely fake:

As in...I straight up don't think those tentacles or this sequence ever existed IRL.

I'm getting the feeling that Henry IRL attacked Mr. Newby the same way he later attacks Brenner and Inmate 58361:

Eye-crushing, no breaking bones for 58361 (very similar to El's kill style), and then shot straight through the ceiling for Brenner. Same as Mr. Newby, but in two parts.

I'm actually fairly certain Henry's having a vision in the attic sequence.

We see this same red lighting appear just minutes before, when Patty's mother turns into a Vecna-fied version of herself to attack Henry...the same Vecna-type makeup Patty gets in Henry's vision of her back during the first DOTM rehearsal:

You can't see it from this angle, but Patty's mom has even got the clawed left hand and everything while she's forcing void-Henry to move in sync with her.

The next time we see Henry IRL, the lighting is back to normal and he's levitating on his own:

They close the curtains:

And when they come back up, he's bathed in red and strung up on the tentacles with Dimension X lightning in the background:

When the sequence ends, Henry in the void/on the stage floor drops to the ground in a heap, and "Henry" on the tentacles falls into a crouch:

But when we see IRL Henry next, the lighting is normal and he's picking himself up off the floor, just like void Henry:

Hell, Henry even tries to hide in the light of a "perfect" memory (Patty and him getting kicked out of Melvald's) when red-light Patty tells him, and I quote, "It's not real, it's a nightmare," (words Henry says to himself constantly) before going on to tell him it doesn't have to be a nightmare, he can make it a good dream.

And when he starts to lose his grip on that memory, Patty in the red light tells him "It's your dream, remember? Anything is possible". Smash cut to the weird "I love you" and Henry freeing himself from the monster (for the moment).

This all becomes especially shrimpresting when you consider that it was red-lighting Patty who told Henry she loves him, and who snapped at him that he had to say it back to fight off the monster.

However, when Henry IRL tries to catch normal-lighting Patty to tell her where to find her mother, she screams "let go of me!" at him while she runs away and leaves him to pick himself up off the attic floor:

Patty remains terrified of Henry right up until Mr. Newby begs her to save him.

That doesn't sound like someone who just confessed their love to Henry as a way to try and walk him back out of the darkness. It just doesn't.

It sounds like, maybe, Henry pulling on a different memory of Patty to try and save himself, or something along those lines. (Staring at Stav's post about the void being the alternate timeline, since he would be both in the void and in a vision...Henward are you trying to save each other..? Anyway, that's shrimping for a different post.) Namely, the memory I'm thinking of is the confession booth scene. Henry tells Patty that he's pretty sure he can make his nightmares come true, and she advises him it's his dream, so why not make it a good one next time?

Arguably, you could say that Patty's trying that same shtick again under wildly different circumstances/she put it all together and knows what he needs to do to break free.

But then...if she, while being actively attacked, is so willing to stand by Henry/help him to the point where she's confessing her love for him, then why does she run and leave him to put himself back together even though he's obviously in distress? Why is she so terrified of him, to the point where she doesn't dare tell Bob about what really happened in the attic for fear of Henry coming after her?

It doesn't add up.

So, tl;dr: I don't think Patty ever said "I love you" to Henry at all. I think that whole damn sequence was a nightmare vision.

I think the "I love you" was something else, whether it be Henry subconsciously "making it a good dream" to save himself, irl Patty, and Mr. Newby...or someone else who a) knows what to do/how to help Henry, and b) is, as Patty says, "Connected, whether [Henry] likes it or not".

As a side note for support: Even Joyce and Hopper display more care for Henry post-attic than Patty does. Now, Patty is well within her rights to be terrified of Henry and not want anything to do with him, don't get me wrong...But don't try to tell me Henry and Patty are "true love/love at first sight" when Joyce and Hopper are ready to go take down Victor in part because Henry's gone missing.

The Jopper conversation when Joyce is convincing Hopper to help her take down Victor goes, and I quote:

Joyce: What about Henry, hm? Any explanation about what happened to him? Why no one knows where he is, or why it's like he disappeared? Hopper: No one knows anything...or if they do, they're not talking.

Meanwhile, Patty is refusing to talk about what happened in the attic because she's terrified that Henry's listening, and that he'll come after her if she talks.

That's not convincing for "true love/love at first sight".

#i'm actually in shambles about Henry and Joyce's barely-there friendship #Joyce was really good to him when he was outcast/being a weird kid #It's like...no wonder she shows Will so much love. Just look at how she treats the brand new weirdo.#st: tfs #tfs spoilers

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dalchiid · 10 months

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𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 44

A story of obsession, fear, and lust. You're a maid whose Masters forbid you in meeting their guests for the night but your luck runs dry when you run into them and catch the attention of Lord Hoseok himself. He's smitten from the beginning and thus, your fate has been decided.

Pairing: Yandere Vampire Hoseok x Fem/AFAB Reader

Word Count: 7,283

Warnings: 18+, Yandere, Obsession, Possessive, Angst, Fear, Blood, Biting, Dub-Con, Eventual smut

Will add or remove warnings based on what's in each chapter.

I do not condone the behavior being exhibited in my work. This is solely for entertainment purposes and I hope if any of you are ever in a situation like this that you have the chance and ability to run away from it. Take care out there.

DO NOT copy, edit, or repost my work anywhere.

Chapter 44 Warnings: Yandere, Possessive, Obsession

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When everything is all done and you're discharged Hoseok calls for a ride. Judging by the playful banter from Hoseok's end you suspect it's one of his brothers. When he hangs up he says that tomorrow you'll get your scripts checked out at the pharmacy because it's too late now and the two of you decide to wait outside despite the weather being a little chilly. It's better than being in the cold hospital.

Hoseok makes sure to keep an arm around you to warm you up but there's not much he can provide with his cool body temperature. So you just tug your sleeves further down until it passes your wrists.

There's a lot worth talking about now but you don't know how to bring it up. Where do you start? Despite it probably being a bad idea as it can ruin the mood you want to talk it out with Hoseok. Before whoever is on their way comes.

You lick your lips and fidget with the cuffs of your sleeves to which Hoseok catches on to.

"You okay," he asks.

You look up at him then down at your hands and shrug. "I think we um... I think we need to talk."

Hoseok angles his body more your way but his arm never leaves you.

"About?"

You think if you don't talk now you never will.

"About everything that happened today."

He angles his head away, craning his neck back before humming.

You look up at him and he has that stupid unreadable expression back on his face. You can't tell anything from it and so you bite the bullet and speak up before he can say anything about it.

"Minjeong," you start nervously. "You really hoped I wouldn't say a word back there."

"And you didn't."

"I didn't because I was scared." You look ahead of you towards the little garden in the roundabout. "You promised me you wouldn't attempt to control my mind again."

"Did I do it?"

You shake your head. "No, but still. You promised you wouldn't and you threatened me. You're making it hard to trust you."

Hoseok heaves a deep sigh. "What do you want me to say? That I'm sorry? Because I'm-"

"You're not. I know. You never are."

Silence blankets over you two as Hoseok mulls over your words. As you mull over everything that has happened to you today.

"I don't like feeling scared Hoseok and I feel like when I'm with you that's all I've been feeling."

His arm slowly slips down until it's wrapped around your waist. His other hand comes around to rest on your cheek as he slowly angles your face towards him. He can only turn it so far before you start resisting so he rests his forehead onto your temple.

"I don't want you to feel scared when you're with me." The words leave him in a whisper.

You shake your head before closing your eyes. By now you would feel the urge to cry but you feel dried up after everything that has happened. You just feel tired.

"Then please stop making me scared. I just want to live my life. Free! Free from anything and everyone. Live a life where I don't have to look over my shoulder in worry."

"You know I can't allow that to happen. Especially after your escape attempt."

Your sigh leaves you in a hiccup. Like your body is trying to cry despite there not being enough tears to let go of.

"You've never given me a chose, Hoseok. When does you roping me in to become addicted to your saliva, the manipulation, convincing my former Masters to let me go so that I can be with you - how does that constitute as giving me a chance? How after it all do you not expect me to fear you? I'm scared Hoseok and as much as I hate you I feel myself caring for the man you showed me before it all. I'm still waiting for him to come back, but when I do see glimpses of him I'm-" You stop yourself. You had to stop yourself before what you say next comes off as a heartfelt confession.

When I do see glimpses of him a part of me is happy and I want to see more of him.

You just can't admit this out loud. Not to him.

"You what?" Hoseok asks. "Tell me. Please."

No you can't. You won't. Not if it's just going to stroke his ego. Not if it's going to sound like you actually care for him. So you try and change the subject.

"I just want you to trust me more. I want your family to trust me more. I want space when it's needed. I want to live a life."

At that moment you feel brave enough to face him. He leans back to look at you and he's again with that unreadable expression. You expect him to say something after a while of silence but he doesn't. Especially not when a car rolls up and you look to see that it's Taehyung.

"We'll talk about this later," he says but you don't want to anymore.

"I'd rather we not."

You stand up abruptly to walk towards the car and you're surprised he doesn't stop you. Quickly you open the car door and settle in while Hoseok takes his time to walk to his side.

Taehyung looks behind him and gives a smile. "How are you feeling now that you got some help?"

"Better," you say.

"That's good."

Hoseok enters to sit in the back with you but you wish he would have just sat in the front. Of course he doesn't and though you expect him to be mad after the conversation you just had he just takes your hand and keeps it on his lap where he laces your fingers together.

The car ride is filled with a bit of chatter. Taehyung asks you what they did in the hospital and you explain what happened. You of course leave out the part where you find Minjeong's number on a piece of paper in your pocket. What he doesn't know won't hurt him. Hoseok is a bit quiet and just lets you guys talk.

You take a chance to look at him and see he's looking out the window. When Taehyung mentions to his brother what dinner they'll be having tonight Hoseok's eyes remain looking out the window and his answer comes off bland.

"Really," he asks though it's with little interest.

Taehyung catches on to it and he looks through his rear view mirror to look at him.

"Everything okay?"

"Yeah." Hoseok says.

You have a feeling you know what his attitude is about. He may not be mad but he's definitely thinking of the exchange you two had just a couple of minutes ago.

Taehyung doesn't prod any further.

The ride is short though as you reach the house in a matter of minutes. When Taehyung begins to back up into the garage he takes a quick glance at Hoseok and you but says nothing. It makes you feel unnerved but you note he isn't making the effort to calm you down. You guess you can't always depend on him to do that.

Once parked he turns the car off and gets out but Hoseok is still looking out the window. Your eyes shift around uncomfortably and it takes you squeezing his hand and calling his name to snap him out of whatever trance he was in.

"We're back," you say.

He blinks a few times and mutters an "Oh" before releasing your hand so he can slip out. You do the same and wait on your side of the car where Taehyung walks up to you.

"Fix it," he says.

Your brows furrow a little as you try to understand what he meant.

He jerks his head towards Hoseok who takes his time doing whatever it is and gives you a scowl.

"You better fix it."

The realization dawns upon you then. He can clearly tell that whatever is wrong with his brother has something to do with you. He isn't concerned to hear what you have to say. He just wants you to correct any errors he believes you made. It makes your shoulders sag as your mood drops. He looks like the old Taehyung you were used to not seeing.

Taehyung gives you one last glance before he leaves you alone with Hoseok who makes his way towards you.

He doesn't smile or anything but he does grab your hand to walk away. Your feet shuffle against the ground as you barely keep up with him. You're stuck in your head, thinking about what Taehyung said.

How do you fix this? Do you even want to fix this? You're not in the wrong here but it seems that not just Hoseok but his brother expects you to pick up after him.

Would it be so bad to apologize? To keep the peace - yeah maybe. You don't like the idea of it but if you want to make more allies you think you should.

You suddenly stop in your place in the entryway and it forces Hoseok to accidentally jerk you forward. He stops and turns around to give you a confused look when you stay where you are.

How do you go about this because you're not sorry. Not really. You're just confused about why he's acting this way and you want answers, but you'll make it into an apology if you really have to.

"Hoseok," you start. "What's wrong?"

He frowns a little in response but no verbal answer follows.

You try not to imagine nor fantasize that this might be the end because you know it's not.

You pull on his arm to bring him closer and he follows through until he's directly in front of you.

Looking over his face you can tell something is plaguing him. It has to be the conversation you had in front of the hospital so you ask him about it.

"What I said back at the hospital - does it bother you?"

He sighs and looks off towards the side.

Yeah. It clearly bothered him.

You lick your lips and mimic his sigh with one of your own. "You know we need to talk about this. What exactly bothered you?"

His eyes draw back to you and you see the look of surprise on his face. Like he was surprised you wanted to talk this out.

"Hoseok," you say. "Talk to me."

His expression lessens from surprised to something almost sentimental before he finally speaks. "You said you didn't want to talk about it."

He's right. You did say that. So was his silence because he was respecting you or is it out of pettiness? You wouldn't put it past him if he was being petty but the look on his face makes you believe otherwise.

Is this the part where you apologize?

You wriggle a little and if it weren't because you were holding his hand you would worry your two between each other.

"I um," you start. "I'm sorry about that."

His face and ears perk up at your apology.

"You mean that?"

No. "Yes."

Now it's like he's looking at you with starry eyes because they begin to glisten.

"You know," he says. "I was really down for a minute there. I don't like knowing that you're scared of me and when you blew me off like that it just made me worry." His other hand comes to rest on your cheek. "Don't do that to me again. Please." He's pleading with you but you don't miss the way that he demands it. "And couples have their disagreements but you take it too far sometimes."

You look down at your feet but he doesn't permit it.

"No. Look at me."

And so you do.

"I know there's a part of you that cares about me. Just give in to it and I'll do my best not to scare you anymore. Deal?"

You don't want a deal but you know he won't allow for you to walk away from this without the answer he wants so you nod.

"Deal."

Hoseok's lips part into that heart shaped smile of his before he leans down to kiss you.

"I love you," he says in between kisses.

You say nothing back but hold on to him when he starts to deepen the kiss.

Your arms wrap around his shoulders as his wrap around your waist. His tongue slips out to run against the seam of your lips and you're about to open up to him until you hear a voice.

"I'd get hard if it weren't for the fact that it's you sucking face with my brother."

You pull back abruptly to see Jimin as he makes his way down the stairs. His brow is raised and you watch as Jungkook makes his way down behind him.

"You get hard for anything that doesn't have a pulse so getting hard for someone like Y/N would be a surprise." Jungkook chimes in.

Someone like Y/N? Why did he say it like that? You don't know if you should feel offended or not by that comment.

Jimin sucks his teeth at Jungkook. "Don't act so high and mighty. Like I haven't caught you taking a whiff of her whenever she passes by."

Jungkook comes to a stop on the last step and looks at his brother with no visible reaction.

"She smells good," is all he says before walking away.

"Is everybody done?" Hoseok asks after the fact.

Jimin rolls his eyes and angles his head towards the way the youngest went. "Dinner is ready. When you're done doing whatever it is you're doing come join us," he says before walking off.

Despite the way this interaction went you're surprised Jimin didn't chew you off like he normally would. By now Hoseok would be coming in to defend you while his brother would continue his rant on why you're the most detestable person in the world.

He must be feeling sick, you think. Something was up. Clearly.

Hoseok interrupts your thoughts by grabbing your hand and pulling you along with him.

"Let's try and get something in your system, okay? You need to eat."

You're not into the idea of eating after the day you had but you do it because you know Hoseok's right.

You walk alongside him to the dining room where everyone is waiting for the feast to commence.

One of the first to acknowledge your presence is Taehyung who looks at both you and Hoseok in a scrutinizing way. You know he's trying to gauge whether or not you "fixed" the situation. You guess you did if the way Hoseok kissed you afterwards means anything. His brow is raised in observance and when he sees, and you guess, must feel the way Hoseok's mood has brighten he drops the attitude. It doesn't stop the way you cower beneath his stare.

The next to acknowledge you is Namjoon. He smiles and you can't help but to give him one back although it barely reaches your eyes. Minjeong's words come to haunt you and so when you're given the chance to be alone with him you'll ask him some questions.

Speaking of questions, Yoongi nods your way when you sit down. You want to ask him about Minjeong. Would he be willing to spill the truth to you? Will he be willing to help you too? You feel like he'd be a harder nut to crack but, just like with Namjoon, you'll wait until you're alone with him to ask.

"So Y/N."

You look towards Seokjin who speaks.

"I heard you were in the hospital. How are you now?"

The doors open as the servants begin to pile in and spread the food around. You're attention is distracted by their appearance for a moment before you answer.

"I'm fine. Feeling a little better now."

"I'll be taking her to the pharmacy tomorrow to pick up her meds." Hoseok chimes in.

"That's good." Seokjin says. "What was the cause of it?"

You lick your lips. "Stress."

He hums. "No doubt after the day you had you would find yourself feeling distressed." He grabs his glass and extends his arm so the servant waiting on him can fill it. "We don't talk much about her but she's really grown to be a thorn in our sides."

He doesn't have to explain who "she" is. You know he's talking about Minjeong.

"Save that conversation for another time." Namjoon says.

The oldest pouts after taking a swig of his wine. "What? I'm sure Hoseok is over it. If not because time passed he has Y/N now. Right Hoseok?"

You look over to the vampire beside you who merely checks his nails before looking up at his brother.

He hums questioningly though you know he heard everything just fine. He brings a hand to your thigh where he rubs it and nods his head.

"I've been over her for a long time now and my attention is solely on Y/N."

Seokjin points at Hoseok but directs his attention towards Namjoon. "See? He's fine."

It doesn't stop Namjoon from rolling his eyes a little.

"I just can't believe she would come all the way out here to destroy a relationship." The oldest continues. "If she cares so much about what Hoseok is up to she should have stayed with him. Instead she's out here, despite the restraining order, harassing my brother and his girl. That'll get anyone's blood boiling."

"Well she's gone now. No point in worrying about it." Yoongi says before he blows on his spoonful of soup.

You look at him and he looks so calm and collected. He refrains from showing any emotion in regards to Minjeong but you wonder if the topic is making him sweat under the collar. You think his brothers would notice his change in heart beat but no one says a thing so you suspect that he really is calm about the whole thing. Was Minjeong telling the truth about him?

You're drawn out of your head when Hoseok taps your thigh and points at the food.

"Eat," he says. "Not too fast though. I don't want you getting another stomach ache."

You look at your bowl of soup and it looks mouthwatering but you know he's right. So when you go to eat you take your time.

No one else seems to want to hold onto the topic of conversation regarding Minjeong. Seokjin is the only one who dared do so but you know how he is. There's a collective silence save for the occasional sound of the spoon clanking against the bowl as everyone eats. It's not uncomfortable but you're so stuck up in your head that even if it were you wouldn't have noticed.

You're thinking about Yoongi. How would you approach him? Should you text him first? See if he'd be willing to talk through there or should you do it in person? Knock on his door when no one is watching you? You'd have to plan around the time you're free from Hoseok, Namjoon, and Taehyung. Whenever that will be... You think you'll text him first. See if he's available and whenever that is then you can confront him.

Confront. The word sounds so harsh compared to what you're going to do. Of course you're going to confront him but it's not like you're going to corner him and demand answers. You just want to talk and hopefully get the truth.

As for Namjoon, you're feeling so conflicted. Minjeong and Yoongi warned you about him. You don't want to believe them but could they be right? Yoongi knows him better than you do but what about Minjeong? What could have transpired between the two to make her say the things that she said? You would like to ask her more things and now that you have her number you can do that.

You want to know more about Minjeong as well but you want to hear it from her and not Hoseok and his brothers. Of course they're going to paint her in a negative light. She's Hoseok's ex that managed to get away.

You hope one day you can be free of him too but you need a better plan. Unlike Minjeong you have no one to care for you. Once upon a time you had Hyun-Woo and even if you still had him would he want to continue where you left off or let things go back to normal? You highly doubt the latter. Maybe Minjeong or even Yoongi can help you come up with something. For now though you're kind of just sitting in the air with nothing to do and nowhere to go.

You choked at the mall but you had a good reason to. Minjeong didn't fault you for it. Instead she reached out for you to give you a hand. Leaving you with her number was the best she could do at that point and you've come to accept it graciously. You'll be sure to text her when given the chance.

Conversation resumes among the brothers. You try to ignore it because it's about work. They talk about it like it's nothing then again it's probably is nothing to them. After their father started them off so young you wouldn't be surprise if that's why. They've become desensitized to it.

"We need to restock before the end of this month." Seokjin says.

"We've already sold that much?" Taehyung questions though he doesn't sound all that surprised.

The eldest nods. "Ask Hoseok and Namjoon about it."

Hoseok grabs a napkin to wipe his mouth. "We've been doing really well as is but this time around we've had more buyers."

"Our new dealer has been supplying to new customers. Some of them have even bought in bulk." Namjoon adds. "Despite his location he's managed to amass customers left and right."

"What about his location?"

You direct your sights over to Jimin who raises his brow in question.

Namjoon places his spoon down and sits back comfortably in his chair. "He's located in the middle of where alot of the rising revolts are taking place. Despite there being many who are against our position they also seek for the high."

"Animals." Jungkook says. "Humans are nothing but simplistic animals."

You hold onto the mouthful of soup as irritation courses through you.

Animals he says. He was no better than one himself. His comment really got to you and it's with a roiling stomach do you swallow your food.

"Vampires are no different." The words leave you before you can stop yourself.

The table grows silent and despite fearing for the worst your anger takes over your mind and your tongue.

You're expecting one of the brothers to say something against you but it doesn't come.

"I guess we are," is all Jungkook replies.

You take in a shaky breath but it's not out of fear. You're just upset. In response Hoseok places a hand on your thigh where he squeezes it gently before letting go. You don't know if that's his way of taking your side or a means to calm you down. Either way you don't care.

After a minute you feel eyes on you and when you look up you see that it's Namjoon who's staring at you. It's hard to read his face so you don't know if he's upset with you or not. When you raise a brow at him he breaks out into a smile. It's a brilliant one but you can't bring yourself to smile. Not without getting some answers from him first.

Dinner is finished and dessert is passed around. You can't bring yourself to eat the chocolate cake so you push it away from you.

"You okay?" Hoseok checks on you.

"I don't think I can stomach this right now." Your stomach twists and turns.

"Okay," he chirps. "Okay that's fine. We'll have it put away for right now."

Before they can retreat into the kitchen Hoseok calls over a servant and tells them to put the cake away for you. The servant bows and takes your plate leaving you with nothing but your drink by your side.

You think you did enough after throwing up so much. You don't want to force yourself to eat something so sweet otherwise you'll begin to cramp again and be back to square one.

Hoseok places a hand on the back of your neck where he massages you. It doesn't serve it's purpose of relaxing you so you tense up in his hold. You know he can feel how off you are about this gesture because of how upset you are with his brother but Hoseok doesn't know when to quit.

Despite not eating your dessert you wait around for everyone to finish. It's during this time the brothers communicate more but you stay out of it. There's nothing left for you to discuss with them as a whole.

When everyone is done they begin to disperse and you watch as one by one everyone leaves the table. First Jungkook followed by Jimin and Taehyung. You're the slightest bit surprised because they're usually the ones that stick around the dining area after everyone heads off. Seokjin and Namjoon make their departure with that leaving it to be just you, Hoseok, and Yoongi. You look at the oldest of the two and he seems to be in no rush to leave but when he does he gives you a small smile. You don't return it not because you're upset with him but because of the blaring thought of you needing to talk to him flashing through your head. The thought consumes you and you're about to tell him to wait up but he leaves before you can try and say something. You think it's best that happens anyway because Hoseok is here with you and you don't want him to know any of what you have to say.

Hoseok plays with your hair and you turn around to look at him as he does this. He has a dopey smile on that you detest.

"Sorry about my brother," he says.

You frown as you wonder which one he could be talking about.

He sees your expression and elaborates. "Jungkook."

Oh, you think.

"You know how he is but I know that you're not used to it. So I apologize."

Your nose twitches in irritation. "He should be the one that's apologizing."

Hoseok gives you a deadpan look. "The day Jungkook apologizes is the day I wake up a human."

In other words it's never going to happen.

"Even then you should just let things be. He's Jungkook. It's just the way he is."

You hate how each of the brothers cover each other's faults. Yes that hate extends towards Namjoon and Yoongi who do the same. You care for the both of them. Hell you've fallen for one of them but their love for their brothers is something else.

"Come on." Hoseok says. "Let's get up. I want you in bed relaxing. After the day we had I think staying in bed and watching TV sounds nice."

You don't refute that fact and so you follow after him when he stands to leave.

He grabs your hand and laces your fingers together before he peppers the back of it with soft kisses - smiling your way when he catches your sight. You're somewhat used to this but after how pissed you grew with Jungkook you're feeling a little intolerant so you look away with a huff. It doesn't stop Hoseok from keeping you close.

Nothing is said as you two make your way to his bedroom. You feel like you don't really have anything to say anyway. Today you road a wave of emotions that left you feeling sick. There's nothing you want more to do than to relax at this moment in time. So when you reach the room and the first thing Hoseok does is get your pajamas you take them graciously and switch your clothes. Once you're changed you flop onto the bed and curl under the sheets.

"Anything specific you'd like to watch?" Hoseok asks after he's changed.

"I honestly don't care." And you don't. You just want to be able to relax.

Hoseok turns the TV on before slipping beneath the covers to join you. He flips through the channels with a purpose to find something either of you like until he finds some reality show he knows you watched before. It kept your interest for a bit so he leaves it on for you.

"Come here," he says.

He doesn't give you the time to react before he pulls you over so you can lie your head against his chest. His hand comes up to massage your scalp to ease the tension you're feeling. You know by doing this he's telling you to relax. It takes some time but when you do he hums.

It's nothing but peace and quiet but your brain runs amok. You're thinking of when it's best to contact Minjeong. You're almost always never alone. Maybe when you're with Hoseok in his study. You can play it off like you're playing a game like you normally do when it's Namjoon who's texting you.

You can't risk a call if you find alone time. Not just because of Hoseok possibly hearing you but the chance of being caught by one of the servants. They're watching you and they'll tell Seokjin all that they've seen and heard. You're put in a precarious situation but you can't miss the opportunity to talk to Minjeong. Maybe then she can help you come up with a better solution to your problem besides running away to hide out at a hotel and sweating your withdrawals off. You hope so.

You try to clear your mind then so you can ease yourself into a sense of rest. You need to calm down so that you don't over stress your body again. Your stomach cramps a little here and there so you try to relax.

Hoseok said you'll get your medicine tomorrow so you'll have to hold off the best you can for now.

Episodes from the TV come and go with you watching them. Hoseok has stopped massaging your head a little while ago. His hand lying limply on the bed behind you. You don't think much of it until you hear something that catches your attention. A soft snore that comes from the man you're lying on top of.

You lift your head and look back to see he's fast asleep. Despite being the cause of most of your stress he was feeling it himself. You look over his face and see his lips are slightly parted. He releases another soft snore as you slowly push away from him. You wish it were you who fell asleep because you deserve it but alas you're wide awake.

You settle into your side of the bed and reach for your phone to check the time. It's almost midnight and it surprises you to see how fast time has flown. You guess when you're just mindlessly watching TV that would happen.

Your eyes shift over to Hoseok who doesn't even move before you look back at your phone and access your contacts. You scroll down to Minjeong's contact and stare at the name Dawn. The nurse's name that took care of you. You had to make sure not to actually put Minjeong's name because if you did and Hoseok went through your phone you'll never hear the end of it.

Your thumb hovers over the name. You think about texting her but you need answers that won't be coming from her. Answers that come with the full truth. You need to talk to Yoongi.

You scroll down the contact list until you reach the end where his name stares back at you. Your heart rate starts to accelerate and you have to calm yourself down lest Hoseok wakes up because he can hear it.

Licking your lips you press on his name and access the little message bubble that pops up. You swallow deeply and begin to type a message that you hope doesn't sound too ominous.

You: Hey Yoongi. Can we talk for a moment?

You hit send and wait for what feels like agonizing minutes. He normally texts you back pretty fast but because you're waiting for his response that you so desperately seek it feels like he's taking forever.

You stare at the screen in waiting hoping you see those little dots come up and move and so when you do you jump a little.

Yoongi: Sure. What about?

As much as you would like to text him something tells you you should seek him out in person.

Looking over to Hoseok you make sure he's still asleep and type out your response.

You: Can we talk in person?

Silence.

You tap your thumb against the side of the phone as you wait. Your bottom lip is trapped between your teeth and you try not to bite hard. You're growing nervous. What if Yoongi says no? What if he doesn't respond and leaves you on Delivered? Or worse Read?

He's taking a while and you're bout to text him to forget about it but the three little dots appear.

Yoongi: I'm in my room. Come over.

You give Hoseok one last look before you creep out of the bed.

This is your chance to start receiving the truth. Don't fuck it up.

Hoseok is knocked out but you're careful to slip out of the room. You forgo the slippers so you can tiptoe and gently shut the door behind you.

You're free from him for the time being and you know you don't have a lot of time. Looking around you make sure no one sees you as you power walk towards Yoongi's room.

Your heart is in your throat. When you swallow it feels like you have to get around a lump and all that does is make you a little more anxious.

Reaching Yoongi's door you bring your fist up and knock. Two simple knocks that don't sound too loud and if it weren't because you know he's a vampire you wouldn't think he could hear it.

You cross your arms and wait while looking down at your feet. Your toes wiggle as more anxiety takes over you. You're on a time limit right now. Yoongi needs to let you in before Hoseok wakes up.

The door before you opens and you see the man you've been waiting for. His hair is pushed back with a headband and he's changed his clothes from slacks with a button-down into a loose shirt with joggers. He extends his hand towards his room as he lets you in. It's a bit of a mess compared to the last time you were here. He has clothes on the chair in the corner of his room and there's scraps of paper here and there. Balled up ones in the middle of his floor and a notepad with a pen on top of his bed.

"Sorry," he says. "It's a bit of a mess around here."

You shake your head. "No no. It's fine."

He takes a seat at the edge of his bed and gives you a look. "Well." He raises a brow. "You wanted to talk?"

At the mention of why you're here the anxiousness from before tries to come back but you take a deep breath before releasing it into a sigh.

"Yeah um..." How do you start this?

You scratch the back of your head before looking Yoongi over. He looks calm. Calmer than you and he doesn't try to rush you. He lets you take your time as you try and get yourself together.

"Uh... I don't know how else to go about this other than to just spit it out." You look him in the eyes. "Is it true that you helped Minjeong escape?"

He stares at you for a beat without an expression to give besides shaking his head.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

You know you must look pathetic because you throw a pleading look his way.

"Yoongi please. Please don't lie to me. I need to know the truth. For my sake."

He inhales long and slow and releases it all in one go. "I don't know what you want me to say. I didn't help Minjeong out. She managed to get out by herself."

You shake your head. "No. S-She was drugged. How could she?" You extend your hands out to him as you speak. "She told me you helped her. If it weren't for you she'd still be here. Just tell me the truth because I-" You pause. "I need help, Yoongi."

He continues to stare at you unwavering without a single expression to give. It unnerves you a bit and you wonder if he's ever going to tell you the truth or die with it.

You're about to plead to him again but he brings a finger up to silence you. It takes you aback but you stay quiet as he looks towards the door. He quickly stands up and rushes towards it, swinging it open and grabbing the maid by her arm. She looks startled. As startled as you. Maybe more. Your eyes are wide open as she trembles in Yoongi's hand. You can't see his face but you imagine the look he's sending her way is far from pleasant.

"What are you doing here" he hisses. "Spying for my brother?"

The maid looks like she's about to cry as she shakes her head.

"Don't lie to me."

"I-I'm n-not, Master"

"Then what were you doing, hm? Don't test my patience."

She whimpers before looking down with fresh tears in her eyes. "I'm sorry."

Yoongi just stares at her without saying a word. Like he's contemplating on what to do with the maid.

You didn't even realize someone was trailing after you. You looked around when leaving Hoseok's room but not when you reached Yoongi's. Maybe if you would have kept an eye out this wouldn't have happened. Maybe. Maybe not.

"I'll let you go," Yoongi starts. "But I want you to tell my brother to mind his own business."

The maid looks up at him with hope in her eyes.

"If I catch you anywhere near me again I'll make sure you'll be left out on the street. Understood?"

The young woman vehemently nods her head. "I-I understand, Master."

Yoongi releases her and you watch as she scurries off in a hurry.

It's startling to see Yoongi mad. He's always come off as calm and patient but despite it it doesn't change that he is a man. A man with emotions like any other. Still it catches you off guard and you find yourself apologizing like this was all your fault.

"I'm sorry for that. I should have paid more attention before coming here."

He shakes his head before closing the door. When he turns towards you he has a neutral expression on.

"It wasn't your fault. Things like this oftentimes happen. When the opportunity to make more money or when they're promised affection from my brother the maids have the tendency to go all out. If it wouldn't have happened now that maid or another would have made the effort to follow you anyway."

Your brows furrow as you take in his words.

Seokjin really has a hold on these women. He's awfully handsome so you guess that's what makes this so easy for him to do. Still. You love Namjoon but you don't see yourself doing his bidding.

Your mind runs wild with these thoughts that you forget the reason for why you're here until Yoongi speaks up.

"Anyway, back to what we were talking about."

You nod with a small "Oh" leaving your lips.

Yoongi leans his back against the door and crosses his arms. "I don't know what you've been told but it's a lie. I didn't help Minjeong. I was asleep when she escaped."

You visibly deflate before him.

Why wouldn't he tell you the truth? Unless Minjeong lied to you. Again? But why would she lie about this? It doesn't make any sense.

His eyes take you in but he doesn't say anything about how despondent you look.

You're thinking of going back to Hoseok's room. It's clear you're not going to get an answer you would like to hear. Whether it's because Yoongi is lying to you or Minjeong lied - either way you're not going to break your head over it.

"Forget about it," you say softly.

Yoongi hums before coming off the door and giving you space to leave. When you reach the doorknob you hesitate when you hear him take in a quick breath.

"What's your relationship with Namjoon?"

Your brows shoot up as you look his way. Why was he asking?

You shrug. "Nothing. We're just friends."

His eyes narrow a bit. "I love my brother but you need to watch your back."

You bring your hand down to your side and face the vampire before you.

"Minjeong told me he couldn't be trusted. Are you saying that too?"

He licks his lips before cocking his hip out. "He's prone to lying. I wouldn't trust what comes out of his mouth. The only thing I can trust about him is how hard he works because he likes the money that comes in. As for everything else it's hard to believe in him."

Your expression is one of disbelief.

No, he couldn't be right. Not Namjoon. Namjoon has proven to you that he likes you. He wouldn't fake that would he? It's hard to believe after everything you two have done with each other. The way he's kissed you and touched you. No man would go that far over a string of lies. It doesn't make sense.

You shake your head and sigh. "I should leave."

You grab the doorknob and twist it.

"I mean it Y/N."

No. You don't want to hear it right now. You want to leave.

The door swings open and just as you're about to leave Yoongi speaks one last time.

"Minjeong was right. About everything."

Freezing in place you look at Yoongi. You can't decipher his expression entirely but you see something akin to determination in his eyes.

So Minjeong was right all along about him. You don't know what prompted him to tell you the truth now but you appreciate it.

"Just keep your guard up. For now."

You don't know what he means by that besides the obvious. You would ask him but he walks over to his bed to sit on - grabbing the notepad to write in as if he didn't just say what he did.

You'll further this conversation another time. For now you'll leave him be and head back to Hoseok.

Keep your guard up... You've been doing that for the most part. Except with Namjoon. Namjoon. You'll talk to him when you have the chance. If he's available tomorrow you'll talk to him and see if you can get the truth from him, but if he's anything like what Yoongi said would it be easy? You're determined to try. Clearly something is up and you're going to get to the bottom of this.

#bts x reader #bts fanfic #bts fic #yandere bts #yandere bts x reader #hoseok x reader #yandere hoseok #yanderebts #btsfanfic #jhope #jung hoseok #hoseok #reader #fanfic #reader insert

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huggybearsunshine · 1 year

Text

Repeat Until Death

[Takes place during THAT scene of 15x3 The Rupture but with nothing to lose, both men let more off their chests than they planned to.]

“Something went wrong,” Cas explained defensively, “You know this, something always goes wrong.”

“Yeah,” Dean shot back, his anger urging him to wound rather than comfort, “why’s that something always seem to be you?”

His shot hit dead center, he could see it immediately on his face.

“You used to trust me… Give me the benefit of the doubt…” the deep and familiar voice answered back, comforting Dean even as it tore at him, “Now you can barely look at me.”

Dean scoffed in response but even then, felt his eyes unable to lock with Cas’ own.

“I’m… dead to you,” Cas went on, unsurprised, which Dean found painful despite his anger, “You still blame me for Mary.”

It was true. Dean couldn’t deny it. It would be a lie if he did.

“Where are you going?” the hunter’s brows dipped in fear as the other man turned to walk away.

“Jack’s dead,” Cas looked to his side to indicate his attention was on Dean, even if his eyes couldn’t bare to be, “Chuck’s gone,” he continued toward the ground next to him, “You and Sam have each other,” Dean didn’t know where he was going with this, until, “I think it’s time for me to move on.”

No, Dean’s brain seemed to shut down at the thought.

His hand shot out without a moment’s hesitation, gripping one of the trench coat’s sleeves tightly.

“Cas,” the word pushed out harshly on a breath.

“I don’t know what you want, Dean,” the Angel’s arm pulled violently as he whipped around, “You hate me, but you won’t let me go!”

“I don’t… hate you…” Dean found it suddenly hard to speak, “My mother is dead, Cas… Again.”

“I’m sorry, Dean…” it was a quiet and genuine apology but felt placating and useless to Dean’s ears.

“You just had to talk to me,” his heart felt like it was clenching in his chest, tight to the point where he’d almost swear these were his last moments, “If you just would’ve let me in on what was going on, she might still be here!”

“I was scared, Dean!” Cas fought back, though even he knew Dean was right, “I was protecting my family!”

“We used to be your family!” Dean’s eyes were clouding over and he feared he’d lose the battle bubbling in him if he let himself cry at that moment.

But Cas’ voice softened rather than rose, “Those didn’t used to be mutually exclusive things.”

“So you’re just going to leave,” Dean found a different emotion overtaking his rage, a feat he didn’t think possible, “Jack’s gone, Mom’s gone, and you’re going to leave me too… Run away and leave the mess behind.”

“You have no idea what I’m leaving behind, Dean,” Cas’ eyes turned in warning.

“Another thing you won’t tell me,” he seethed, “I’ll add it to the list.”

“You want to know?” a surprising and hateful laugh pushed out of the Angel.

“Why not?” he squared up, “Not like you have anything to lose anymore, right?”

“I guess you’re right…” Cas nodded bitterly, “Okay…” he turned away, collecting his thoughts for what felt like an excruciating amount of time before he turned back, “I’m in love with you… I’m fairly certain you’re aware of that, and even more certain you don’t feel the same, but there it is nonetheless.”

Dean’s brain seemed to still on that statement, eyes looking lost to find where he had misheard him, but he found no word out of place, no phrase misconstrued.

“So, I’m sorry I have failed you so much…” Cas continued, “It was only ever my intention to be there for you in whatever way you would allow,” he swallowed harshly as emotion filled his eyes, “I’m sorry fate provided you with such a poor ally… I will free you of the burden, Dean. Goodbye.”

The door was slamming shut before it all caught up and actually began to clear the fog in Dean’s mind.

“Wait,” he spoke to the empty room until his feet allowed him movement enough to scale the stairs, “Cas, wait!”

He flung the door opened and ran after and in front of him before the Angel could reach the door to the truck he was headed toward.

“Dean, please just let me go,” he huffed, barely containing tears.

Dean didn’t recall him ever crying before, and it struck him as unnatural. Something that shouldn’t be allowed.

“Don’t,” is all his still reeling mind would provide.

“Don’t what?” an agonized confusion played across the other man’s face.

“Don’t go,” he tried again, only slightly improved, “I… I didn’t know.”

“I tried to spare you that knowledge,” Cas spat, attempting to push around him, but Dean knew his moves too well, and he countered successfully until he was in front of him again.

“Why?” the hunter pressed.

“Why?” Cas finally met his eyes, “You want me to explain to you why I didn’t wish for you to reject me?”

He rounded him again, reaching a hand out for the handle on the truck’s door.

“I wouldn’t have,” Dean’s voice was small, smaller than he ever remembered it being.

Cas froze with his hand still extended, now shaking in front of him.

“I wouldn’t have,” Dean repeated, stronger this time.

“What are you talking about?” Cas practically coughed the words out.

“Cas, I don’t know how else to say it,” he looked around him, overwhelmed and terrified.

“You do,” Cas’ voice turned bitter again, “If it’s anything like what I’ve felt for you, you would know.”

“Fuck, Cas, I love you too! Please don’t go!” it burst from him almost painfully.

His hand took action, grabbing at the loose fabric bunched at Cas’ tense shoulder and turning him. Then he pushed until Cas’ back hit the side of the truck.

“Don’t go,” he repeated, stepping into the space he had made clear was too close for them, “Please don’t fucking leave me.”

Cas’ breath caught as the air closed in between them.

“Okay,” it fell out easy as Dean closed in even further.

“Don’t ever leave me again,” his lips ghosted over Cas’ as if he expected to be pushed away.

“I’ve never wanted to be anywhere else,” all of the tension drained from his body as his tears fell free, “But I couldn’t breathe, Dean… with you hating me, I couldn’t bare to see it…”

“I’ve never hated you, Cas,” he rubbed a hand through the Angel’s hair and pressed their bodies tightly together, “I just… don’t know what to do… everything fell apart.”

His own tears freed themselves and a violent sob let out.

His head knocked against Cas’ temple almost harsh enough to bruise.

“She’s gone, they’re gone, and I can’t…” he clung as his knees weakened beneath him.

“I know, Dean,” Cas took hold of him, baring his weight gladly, “I wish I could take it back… I wish I could fix this for you- I’m so sorry.”

The floodgates gave and words refused to form, just guttural and wretching noises as Dean sank and Cas let himself sink with him.

They were falling in the most heartbreaking way imaginable, but that seemed fitting for them.

Nothing had ever come easily or joyously for any of them. So, why would love be different?

——————

@destieliscanon5nov and @destiel-wings my forever muse and much beloved beta reader!

#dean winchester #castiel #castiel x dean #destiel #destiel fanfic #destiel fic #destiel ficlet #short ficlet #ficlet #jack kline #mary winchester #angry castiel #grieving Dean Winchester #divorce arc #spn #supernatural #Castiel confesses to Dean #spn 15x03 #the rupture

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renlyslittlerose · 10 months

Text

Another Moonlight Serenade ‘B Side’. Based off the prompts that @ghostlingpupskywalker and @kittonafoxgirl suggested, regarding Obi-Wan’s reaction to finding out that Anakin was more grievously wounded than he first let on!

All’s Fair in Love and War (2k)

‘1944/05/23 Skywalker Queen Victoria Hospital East Grinstead, England

Dear Kenobi,

I hope all is well. Still stuck at the hospital, but I can’t complain too much. The food is warm, the beds soft, and the nurses are pretty. Did I mention we get free beer on tap whenever we want? I guess there are some perks to being wounded. But I can’t wait to get back out in the field. I miss the skies. I also feel like I’m not doing my part like I should. Rex keeps telling me that he can win the war without me, but I beg to differ.

My arm is still on the mend, as I am sure you can tell from the different handwriting. One of the new nursing sister’s has volunteered her time today, in exchange for a game of bridge later on. The RAF boys have been playing “Shove Ha’Penny” in the mess the last couple of nights. I still don’t find it all that appealing, but it’s the only thing going on, so I find myself learning the game despite my best efforts.

Well, there isn’t much doing. I’m due in for another surgery but rumour has it I’ll be discharged soon. Can’t wait. I’m getting sick of the smell here - too clean and sterile.

Wishing you well. Stay safe, and leave some fighting for me.

Skywalker.’

Obi-Wan fiddled with the edges of the letter, running the thin blue paper against the pad of his thumb. Anakin’s words stared up at him in unfamiliar, feminine handwriting. He’d been through six different nurses so far, each with their own particular way of spelling and writing, though their penmanship was universally legible and neat - unlike most of the officers’ who wrote as if they were being chased by a herd of wildebeest. Obi-Wan wondered when he’d get to see Anakin’s again - all sharp angles and the occasional misspelled word.

Anakin kept promising in his letters that there would be one more surgery - just one more - and he’d be right as rain again, but after three different hospitals and numerous surgeries later, Obi-Wan was beginning to suspect that something more grievous had happened. The facts didn’t add up, Anakin’s assurances sounding less and less comforting each time Obi-Wan opened a letter only to be greeted with the sight of another person’s handwriting.

He loathed to pry; he had no right, really. He knew he ought to take Anakin’s word as it was given, and believe him despite it all, and yet…

Worry sat in Obi-Wan’s guts, tangling deep in with all the other anxieties he’d swallowed at the start of the war. Though he’d only known Anakin a short while he already knew his habits, the little ways in which he carried himself bleeding through the letters he dictated. He was scared - scared and grieving and so terribly sad. It made Obi-Wan want to weep; to ask if he could help; to pack his bags and swim across the channel to see Anakin with his own two eyes - touch the scar on his cheek and kiss away whatever it was that had hurt him so. He wanted to hold him in his arms and tell him that it would all be okay, even though Obi-Wan wasn’t sure it would, or could, ever be right again.

Folding the letter up, he slipped it in the front pocket of his shirt before leaving the mess tent. It was early afternoon beneath the hot Italian sun, the stink of petrol and oil thick in the muggy air. Most of the men had taken shelter beneath the trees that sprouted up in the hills, the tents far too hot to spend any time in unless you absolutely had to. Squinting back the sun he headed toward the tent at the end of the camp next to the freshwater source.

He found the field medic, Captain Buck, sat at a table, sweat beading down his forehead as he filled out a form in front of him. Next to him were a stack of other such sheets along with an opened water canteen, the contents probably long since dredged. Behind him a man lounged on a cot, bandages thick and white wrapped around his skull and his knee - a victim of an early morning motorcycle accident awaiting transport to a nearby field hospital.

Buck smiled when Obi-Wan stepped inside and sat back in his chair, the wood creaking beneath him.

“I’m sure one of the boys would share his shady spot with you outside if you asked,” Obi-Wan said.

“Why?”

“It’s rather hot in here, isn’t it?”

“Really? I hadn’t noticed.” He smiled despite the beads of sweat that dripped along his temple.

“I suppose it’s a state of mind,” Obi-Wan remarked. He resisted the urge to tug at the collar of his shirt. “How’s our Lieutenant doing?”

“He’s fine; just a little banged up. Probably more embarrassed than anything - I guess he got spooked by a passing goat and swerved into a ditch trying to avoid it.”

“Did the goat survive?”

“It’s who alerted the locals to his presence!”

“Perhaps we should take the goat with us - have it aid us as an early detection alert.”

Buck chuckled before sitting forward again, his hands locked together on the table. “Not that I don’t appreciate the visit, but is there something I can help you with, Major?”

Obi-Wan hesitated a moment. It really wasn’t his business - Anakin had kept whatever it was from him for a reason. And yet…

“Queen Victoria Hospital back in the UK - have you heard of it?”

Buck nodded. “They’re known for their plastics unit - specialize in burn trauma and recovery.”

“Is that all they do?”

“No, but that’s why they send our men over there. Why? Do you know someone who’s there?”

“Yes - a fellow with the R.C.A.F. He was shot down a few months ago, but has been rather tight lipped about the extent of his injuries.”

“Stands to reason he was burned in the crash. It’s common for airmen to suffer from burns due to the fuel tanks in those things. They tend to… explode when filled with bullets.”

Obi-Wan had seen burn victims before. During his first year of service in the war he’d help drag a man from a burning Blenheim, a memory he’d tried to forget. He could still smell the scorched fabric of his uniform and hear his screams as their commander tried to put out the fire, touch brutal as he beat back the flames in an attempt to stall its quick creep up his legs and across his chest.

The smell of his burning flesh reminded Obi-Wan of grilled pork, and he felt mildly sick for weeks any time he caught a whiff of cooked meat.

Obi-Wan’s gut twisted. Anakin was such a near perfect creature, youthful skin marred only by nicks and cuts caused by the errors of youth. The thought of his skin, bronzed and dotted with freckles and beauty marks, being twisted and torn and warped by the heat of flames made Obi-Wan want to be sick.

“If he’s up and talking and walking, he’s going to be fine,” Buck said, his voice creeping back into Obi-Wan’s consciousness. “They’re doing some fabulous work over there; best of the best. He’d in good hands.”

“Yes, of course,” he said quickly. Swallowing the sour spit in the back of his throat, Obi-Wan smiled tightly as Buck. “I have one more question, if I may.”

“Of course.”

“Your typical arm fracture wouldn’t require multiple surgeries, would it?”

“Not if it’s just a regular break. Maybe one or two, if the surgeon didn’t know what he was doing, but setting the bone and casting it is typically good enough.” Buck sat back again and rested his hands on his stomach. “Did your friend hurt his arm?”

“Yes.”

“How many surgeries?”

“A fair few, though I’m doubtful they were all for his arm, if what you say about Queen Victoria is true.”

“Would I lie?”

“No,” Obi-Wan replied. “Though I wish you would right now.”

Buck’s smile tensed, sympathy flashing across his eyes. “I’m sorry, Kenobi, I wish I could offer you more reassurances.”

Obi-Wan nodded and tugged at the bottom of his shirt, pulling the fabric of his shirt off of his sweaty chest. “It’s as you say - he’s receiving the best care available.”

“He is.”

“Thank you for lending me your ear.” Buck nodded, smile once again softening. “And let me know if you need any help when the truck comes for the Lieutenant.”

“I will.”

Obi-Wan slipped out of the tent into the marginally cooler air. As he walked back to his tent the letter in his pocket sat heavier.

XXX

‘I think I owe you a proper explanation for that. When I said that I was recovering, I wasn’t being entirely truthful. I’m fine, but there were complications with my arm. They had to amputate it.’

“Oh, darling…”

“You alright?”

Obi-Wan glanced up from his letter to peer at one of the men from across the table. It was late at night, the tent buzzing with men and moths as they congregated around the kerosene lamps that dotted the tables in the mess tent. Off in the distance Obi-Wan could hear the distant rumble of aircraft engines a few short miles away as night fighters took advantage of the cloudless skies.

“Fine,” Obi-Wan said, his breathing catching on his throat.

“You sure? You look a little piqued.”

“I’m fine.”

Folding the letter up he stood and left the tent with haste. It wasn’t until he was in his tent, sat on his cot, with a flashlight pointed at the letter did Obi-Wan read the rest of it. Anakin’s assurances he was alright and the photograph he’d sent of his garden did little to reassure Obi-Wan that he truly was okay. Losing an arm was traumatizing enough, but losing the ability to fly was like asking Anakin to breath without air, or sing without a voice, or love without a heart. Flying was everything to him.

And Obi-Wan couldn’t reassure him; couldn’t be there to help him in the ways he knew he needed help.

Instead he was stuck in the middle of Palestine, constrained by his duties, beaten down by grief and misery, made to stay and fight in a war that had already taken so much from him, and had stripped what little left Anakin had from him. All he could do for Anakin was write useless words of encouragement on blank sheets of paper while censors held him back from declaring his foolish, delirious love for him.

Anakin deserved better; they both deserved better.

It wasn’t fair. It was all so unfair.

Those who didn’t know loss and fear like a soldier did would remark that life wasn’t fair; that life was filled with ups and downs and we were powerless to stop them. Those religious would even state that things always happened for a reason, as if to make it sting a little bit more; as if to make you feel more inadequate, more powerless. But things didn’t just happen, and life should be fair. It was easy to say that it wasn’t because then it absolved humanity from even trying - for striving for something better.

Anakin wouldn’t have lost his arm, been burned, been tortured, stripped of his life’s goals and aspirations because there should have been no war - no conflict, no death, no misery. And if there had to be conflict then let the old fight’ the men in their suits in their offices who signed the papers and made the choices. Let them take up arms and come to blows while the youth lived in peace and security.

Life wasn’t fair because they made it so.

Obi-Wan was sick of it.

Standing, Obi-Wan kicked over his cot, watching the sleeping bag fall on to the sand covered floor as the wooden frame clattered in the quiet space. Next he kicked his side table, sending documents and a compass down on to the floor next to the bag, the two creating a mess that was satisfying for only a moment. It wasn’t often he acted out in such a way - not any more - but the anger came through him, hot and sudden and biting, making him want to scream and tear, to rage and cry. It was almost overwhelming, the sudden build up of grief, like a torrent of rain and waves against the hull of an already battered ship, continual and never-ending.

But the release only lasted a moment - a sudden violence followed by a calm that Obi-Wan wasn’t sure what to do with. It was almost easier to remain angry.

Taking a deep breath he looked down at the chaos he’d created, the light from his flashlight flickering off the turned over cot and messy sheets. As far as temper-tantrums went it wasn’t very impressive. The sheets could be cleaned up in moments, the bed righted in much the same amount of time. But at least it could be fixed, unlike everything else in the world.

He cleaned up the mess in the relative dark, his flashlight waving about the tent walls as he righted the bed and sorted through the papers. Once finished he kicked off his boots and collapsed on top of the sleeping bag, head cushioned by his arm. The letter sat in his free hand, the paper crinkled and worn. If he tried hard enough he could almost smell Anakin’s cologne on the sheet - cinnamon and something else, something that made Obi-Wan nostalgic for soft embraces and laughter against his neck.

He’d write a letter tomorrow, when the sun had risen and the crush of Anakin’s loss wasn’t felt as deeply. For now, Obi-Wan would wallow in his sorrow. He knew Anakin wouldn’t begrudge him for that.

#obikin #star wars fanfiction #lemon fanfiction #Moonlight Serenade fic

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