#fact that it's VACATIONS and he's been at home for 7 days studied Nothing just makes you think. does he think im an idiot
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Ruins - Part XVI
Chapter 16/?
Wordcount 4,1k
Title Part XVI
Fandom Shuumatsu no Valkyrie / Record of Ragnarok
Previous chapters
1 . 2 . 3 . 4 . 5 . 6 . 7 . 8 . 9 . 10 . 11 . 12 . 13 . 14 . 15
Symbols ⭕ ➕ 💛
Warnings: none
Tagging @holdyourwine @lilacshouko (If you want to be tagged in any of my stories, just leave a comment on this chapter or send an ask or a message)
N. A.: So... it's been a while lol Some things happened the last weeks that kept me away from my works, but finally I'm back 💜 During this time, I've faced stress from work, I got COVID, I recovered from it, got back to work for a few days until my vacation started, then I traveled, and now I'm back home. I didn't map this chapter, but I already knew what I wanted to include in it, so it wasn't really hard to work on it. As a way to apologize, I made it longer, so I hope you enjoy it :)
While Zeus’ son took to himself the task of traveling to Midgard in order to make the announcement to the bride’s family, the other messengers were sent to the Heavens, to deliver the invitation to the groom’s youngest brother and his family; to the depths of the Seas, where his other brother saw his predictions about being requested in Valhalla in a few months turn into reality; and to the Underworld, where the god of Conquest received the news with enthusiasm: the growth of his family and the birth of a goddess were things that he hasn’t seen in ages. The pantheons that were in good terms with Greece were also invited, of course, and the preparations for the next great festivity inside each of them started immediately after the messengers’ departure.
Hermes and all the younger gods who worked under him haven’t had that amount of work in a long time: having a date settled for the next weeks, your wedding was now a reality, and given the unprecedented nature of the union and the fact that one of the most important gods was involved in it, there were many people to be informed and messages to be sent.
In a way that would only surprise people who knew nothing about human beings, the human girls were the first to know about the wedding, and they wasted no time in coming to congratulate you and cheer up with the perspective of a new party in Valhalla: this wasn’t something that happened every year, so they were right in considering themselves lucky. The ones with whom you had a closer friendship asked you about your feelings towards marriage and if you were nervous about the idea of leaving humanity behind, and even if you already knew what type of goddess you would be, but there wasn’t really much you could answer: since you were never married before, you still didn’t know how you were supposed to feel, and the same could be said about the ritual and the events would follow it; about being a goddess, Hades told you that your purpose would become clear to you after your transformation, but some of your current passions, interests and personality traits could influence in the process, so it was too soon to have a definitive answer in this sense.
To be honest, you were more anxious about your role as a Queen than about being given divine powers: by the studying sessions you’ve had the last months, you were aware that working as a governor was a great responsibility, and you felt anything but prepared for it. You already talked about this to Hades, who tranquilized you, stating that you would be by his side for all the time you needed; you always tried to focus on this, but sometimes your anxiety would take the best from you, and thinking about the future was the last thing you wanted.
***
The greenish stem of the narcissus grew out of the little amount of soil seconds after you poured some drops of the mixture you just created, and your eyes widened with the vision. It’s been several days since you started experimenting with flowers, but Valhalla’s technology didn’t cease to impress you: countless possibilities of creating new species that would grow before your eyes with the most exuberant colors and shapes were a dream coming true; it was the perfect type of work, according to your standards, being a fusion of observation, study, creativity and sensibility, with endless paths to explore and beauties to discover.
The first leaves appeared all over the stem and on the upper side of it, making you hold your breath. It was almost there; you were sure you had the correct amount of substances united this time, so now the petals should have the desired shade.
The first petal appeared among them, followed by the others…
And then you had a purplish, iridescent flower, just like all the others you already had around you.
You sighed, disappointed. Yes, you loved the garden you ended up creating on that corner of the Greenhouse, and you loved the flower you just planted as well, but you felt you would have loved it more if you finally got the shade you’ve been trying to create since the last month: a celestial, vibrant blue, just like the blue that overcame the skies after the twilight and preceded the black of the night during summers in your homeland. You’ve been trying many things to create a variation of the species with such color, but the farthest you got was to create a purple flower.
You went to your notebook, opened on the table, and started revising your notes.
– These are the most beautiful mistakes you’ve ever made, little one.
You startled, then smiled, closing your notes and turning to Hades, who just crossed the room’s entry and was now touching the flowers that hanged upon it. He was aware of your incessant attempts to create the blue narcissus, and has been following your work from close, so he knew you were far from the results you wanted; still, he never ceased to admire your creations, seeing them as works of art, or beautiful mistakes, as he liked to say.
He approached the table as you leaned on it, crossing your arms and leaving the newest flower at sight.
– And what about this one? – you indicated it with a look.
His response was to touch the purple petals with his fingertips the same way he used to do with your hair, admiring the variations on its surface, created by the light that entered through the transparent walls, filtered by the leaves of the trees and ivy that surrounded the place, among which many of your own flowers spread.
– It might sound as a common place – he started – But this one surpasses all the others. How did you make it?
You showed your notes to him.
– I don’t understand what’s going on – you complained, observing the flower while he looked through the text – I’ve been calculating everything so carefully, yet it seems impossible to reach the exact shade of blue I want. I need to make the green undertone more prominent, but the red one just won’t decrease, no matter how much I work on it...
Hades spent a moment in silence, alternating his gaze between the notes and the flower. He has been the one who encouraged you most in this project, not letting you give up every time an unexpected color appeared on the petals and praising the results you’ve managed to reach, even when they weren’t exactly what you wanted; as a request made by you, however, he never interfered in the process, whether using his powers or giving you the subtlest instructions.
When he finally returned you the notebook, you thought he would give you some advice, but his response was to smile while observing the narcissus with a mysterious gaze.
You were the one who restarted the conversation.
– So… what do you think?
He took a moment to reply.
– I think your progress is something impressive, even for our standards – he touched the flower one more time; and, looking at his surroundings, – You just built an entire garden of new variations of narcissus in a matter of weeks. It is just my opinion but, despite not reaching your goal, you have all the reasons to proud, my y/n.
You had this sensation that Hades found something on your notes – maybe the mistake you’ve been making or the reason, the element you were yet to add to your formula, but it was currently out of your possibilities – but instead of talking about it, he preferred to use his time to encourage you.
You sighed.
– It’s not that I don’t like what I’ve produced until now. I love all of this – you made a gesture with your hands, indicating your creations – I mean, who wouldn’t love to work on something that would be impossible in their own homeland? Still, being aware of your own limitations is tiring sometimes… even for us.
Hades turned his eyes to you in a curious manner; however, he didn’t share whatever important discovery he did at that very moment with you, suddenly changing the subject with no additional explanations.
– Will you come with me for a moment? – he offered his hand – There’s something I need you to see. Well, actually, it is a place I want to show you.
You looked all over your table and frowned.
– Right now? I’m a bit occupied…
– It won’t take too long, I promise – he assured you – You will be back to continue your experiments when you least expect. And in a lighter mood, I hope.
You surrendered, holding his hand with both of yours with a smile: maybe you really needed a break from your efforts.
– If you say so…
Hades gave one last look at the narcissus before taking you out of the Greenhouse.
– Not only this, but maybe we can even find a spot for these wonderful mistakes here.
***
Though Valhalla was a seemingly borderless place, you somehow thought you’ve already met any space where your people were allowed to step in, so when Hades said that he wanted you to meet a new place, you felt as curious as you haven’t been in a while.
However, when you noticed he was leading you to a zone you knew to be exclusive for the gods, your curiosity turned into suspicion.
You were now crossing a narrow path of white stones that led to a high building of the same shade, except for the golden decorations surrounding the columns and the frames of the windows; the building was located behind great golden gates that were opened at that moment. You didn’t take long to understand of kind of place it was.
You stopped midway, making your partner stop too.
– Wait, this is a lodge, right? – you frowned – Are you sure that I can enter it? I don’t want to cause any problems…
Hades showed no worries concerning your presence there. Letting go of your hand, he caressed the top of your head.
– You can enter as long as you have permission – he explained – There won’t be any problem as long as you stay with me.
After you crossed the gates and stopped in front of the building, he stretched his hand to the great doors, opening the way for you.
***
The place was more like an apartment than a room, for various reasons: first, it was larger than any other place you’ve visited at Valhalla; second, by the number of doors and openings on the walls visible when you entered the private sections, you supposed that there was a reasonable number of departments which use would go beyond the bed area.
The first thing you saw when you stepped into the chambers was what looked like a living room or a space dedicated to visitors. The walls, covered in a purple wallpaper with a sophisticated pattern representing flowers and almonds, were extremely high for a common room, at least the ones you were used to find in the houses of your acquaintances in Midgard; perhaps those ones were an example of what you would find at a noble residence. There were a sofa and two upholstered chairs with a shade similar to the one of the walls, and a small table was placed at the center. The decoration consisted in small statues that reminded you of the ones at the Gardens, vases and exotic flowers. The walls, by the way, were covered in oil paintings that represented episodes from the stories told by Hades, all of them made in aged gold.
You didn’t need any explanations to guess what kind of place was that.
So… he brought me here to show me the room where we will spend our honeymoon.
He closed the door behind you and stopped by your side, smiling at your silence and your widened eyes.
– If only you could see the glimmer in your eyes now, little one – he commented – I feel like I should have introduced you to this place earlier.
You felt your cheeks getting warm and smiled.
– So… This is where you’ve been hiding for all this time? – and, looking around, – It’s quite comfortable.
He laughed.
– Actually, I’ve been using a different apartment, closer to Hermes’ chambers. It made it easier to approach you, since this building here is isolated.
You were staring at the flowers while he spoke, and didn’t take long to notice they were natural. You turned to him with a mixture of diversion and suspicion.
– Still, you’ve been here before taking me with you, right? – you pointed at the flowers – Otherwise, who’s been taking care of these flowers for you?
Hades pretended to be surprised for a second before start laughing.
– Loki was right when he said it was impossible to lie to you, then – he passed an arm around your waist and caressed your face – But let me tell you that this time you’re mistaken. These plants had their structure modified in order to increase their lifespan, so that they’ve been here for quite some time, being maintained with little effort from the elves’ part.
You shrugged.
– Really?
He nodded.
– Really. Now, allow me to show you the rest.
At the back of that room, at the same direction of the entry, there was a pair of doors of the same material of the first ones. Hades took you by the hand to them, then opened them both with a push of his free palm.
***
The bedroom had each corner built in art, beauty and exuberance.
The walls were covered in a softer version of the wallpaper you found at the living room, creating the sensation that the room was larger; the ceiling, just like the one of a church, had a Classic oil painting that would spread throughout its extension, exhibiting peaceful scenes of nature and mundane life.
At the center of the place, you saw the largest bed your imagination could conceive, with big pillows and cushions, covered with rosy, satin sheets. Above the upholstered headboard, there was an enormous tapestry which borders were sewn in golden threads, but it was the image depicted in the fabric that enchanted you: a garden that reminded you of the ones prepared for humans at Valhalla, full of fruit trees and lush grass; in a clearing formed among those trees, there was a group of nymphs on barefoot, with white dresses and flower crowns on their heads, holding hands to form a circle, dancing while the winds would blow in their wild hair (one of them even lost her crown, but didn’t mind stopping the dance to get it back); at the picture’s left, in the background, there was a faun sitting on a rock, dangling his hairy legs and playing a syrinx while birds and other small animals surrounded him. Framing this tapestry, there was a pair of curtains, opened and wrapped with golden threads on each side of the bed; they were connected to a woody structure that formed a sort of canopy. In front of the bed, there was an arc of bronze following the bed’s width, and under it a heavy carpet.
At your right, there was a pair of rosy doors that would lead to a balcony, while at your left you saw a few doors that you supposed to take the visitor to bathrooms, a kitchen or other essential departments. You looked around, searching for any source of artificial light, but couldn’t find any lamps; instead you saw candle holders at each wall.
Everything was clean, well built, luxurious… and a bit outdated.
Your silence might have caused a bit of discomfort, because Hades turned to you and politely asked for a verbal response.
– So… what do you think?
You looked at him, opened your mouth and closed it again.
Heavens, how am I going to tell him that, despite being beautiful, this place looks like it’s been closed since the Middle Ages?
You didn’t want to hurt your lover’s feelings, of course, but you had to be honest. You decided to examine the territory.
– Of course I loved it, and I’m flattered that you brought me here in anticipation but... let me ask you… – you bit your lip – When was the last time you used these chambers?
Hades crossed his arms and took a moment trying to remember, and the answer he gave you was, at the same time, the type of thing you were expecting and the last thing you could imagine.
– Hm… a few years ago, in an emergency, when I, my brother Zeus, Shiva and Odin had to travel here and solve an issue involving the human Nostradamus and the Bifrost.
You stared at him for a while, not hiding your surprise. A few years ago, he was saying?
– Nostradamus? You mean, that man Nostradamus, who lived centuries ago?
– Yes.
– Well…
When he finally understood, he started to laugh, passing his arms around you.
– Of course, we can redecorate it with something… modern, little one – he kissed your cheek – We will do anything that brings comfort in this important moment.
– I apologize if it looks like I’m calling you an old man – you laughed in embarrassment – It’s just that… time runs faster for us.
He looked around, letting out a nostalgic sigh.
– I see – and, suddenly changing the subject, – So, if this is the case, hurry up, because there’s something you need to see right now.
With a cheerful smile, Hades took you by the hand through the balcony’s door before you could say anything in response.
The balcony wasn’t really large, and it was structured in delicacy and elegance: the parapet was built in white marble, with Spring concepts carved in the stone; at your right, you saw a small table and two chairs, and upon it a tiny, empty vase, while at your left there was a narrow spiral staircase leading upwards. You were taken through it by the hand, and when you finally reached the upper floor, your eyes widened.
A private garden was built there, as a smaller version of the Secret Garden, where you’ve lived the most important moments of your relationship until that day. There were statues of beautiful heroes and damsels, as well as others representing forest creatures and animals, and benches near them; there were fruit trees which height was probably modified in the Greenhouse in order to fit that space, something that worked perfectly as far as you could see; in the center of the garden, there was a fountain where the birds would bathe and drink water, and they all flied when you approached them, splashing drops at all directions and making you laugh. The floor was of reddish, rectangular blocks made of stone, and it formed a labyrinth of narrow paths that led to each corner of the garden, so that every of those beauties would be at your hands’ reach.
However, you couldn’t help noticing that there were some empty vases here and there, as well as spaces on the grass that could be used to grow new plants. You turned to Hades and questioned him about this.
– Do you remember when I said we could find a spot for your wonderful mistakes?
You opened your mouth in surprise. So this was what he had in mind?
– This soil is prepared to receive every new species created in the Greenhouse – he explained – So your flowers will never feel abandoned when we bring them here. Even after our departure to Hellheim.
You frowned, worried.
– So... they will stay here?
– The elves will take care of them, so you don’t need to worry – he smiled – Besides… who told you that you will never return to Valhalla?
– But I thought…
– Yes, travels from Hellheim to Valhalla have been rare, with important events and crisis being the exceptions. But this is while I lived alone – Hades caressed your hair – Now, with a beloved wife by my side, changes in this sense are expected.
Your cheeks warmed up. Being called like that, even when you were still human and not married, made your heart skip. You wrapped your arms around your lover and laid your head on his chest, trying to find out if the same happened to his heart as well.
– Thank you for everything – you whispered – Thank you for your love.
– No – he replied – Thank you for your love.
***
The conversation that took place when you walked down the stairs and went back at the balcony was one that you knew you should have, sooner or later; well, actually you’ve been trying to find an opportunity to have it the last days, but no appropriate moment came. Now that you were at the very place where you should become a married woman, you understood that the time you’ve been waiting for has finally come.
While you stopped at the parapet to appreciate the landscape, your deliberations didn’t go unnoticed by Hades.
– Is it just me or have you been a bit nervous since you came here? – he started; and with a playful smile, – Is there something bothering you besides the decoration?
You giggled.
– I don’t know if bothering is the best word for this, but… Yes, there’s something I’ve been wanting to discuss with you for days – you took his hands on yours – You know, I’ve already told you that I’ve been in a few relationships, but all of them were too brief, so that they didn’t develop into something more… serious, intimate.
It didn’t take long for him to understand.
– Are you telling me that you’ve never been touched?
A heat came up to your face at those words: though you had no restraints in your communication, it still had a strange impact to hear him speak straight about this.
You nodded in confirmation.
– You’re the first person with whom I’ve got this far in a relationship, so… Yes, you will be my first.
Hades brushed your hair behind your ear.
– So, not being experienced makes you afraid? But what exactly do you fear?
You sighed.
– I fear that I end up not knowing how to… behave… That I feel uncomfortable... and mess up everything... and look ridiculous... and disappoint you…
Holding your face with both hands, his response was to give you a long kiss on your forehead.
– If these are the things you fear, then let’s not allow them to happen – he replied – When the time comes and you sense them approaching, just tell me, and we will take care of them together. Sounds good for you?
– Sounds perfect – you smiled, putting your hands upon his – Thank you for understanding.
– And thank you for sharing this with me, my y/n – he sighed – Since you decided to speak about this… There’s something I’d like to share with you too.
– Really? And what is it?
That time, Hades was the one who showed hesitation in his manners.
– It’s been a while… Well, it’s been a long time since I’ve been in a relationship. Before I met you, I’ve already forgotten how it felt like – he lowered his tone – Besides, I’ve never touched a human being, so, in a certain way, it will be a first time for me too.
That revelation changed the entire way you saw him. By the stories you’ve always heard about the gods and their interactions with humans, you knew that romantic and sexual relationships between the two species – which many times resulted in the birth of beings called demigods – was a common place, so the possibility of it not being the case with the King of the Underworld was something that never occurred to you. But now that you thought of it, it made sense: he has been living in a domain to where your people would only go after dying, and rarely left it without good reasons; besides, by what he told you about his family life, it was implied that he has been so busy with the matters involving his brothers that his personal life was left aside for what might be equal to ages. Indeed, there never seemed to be room for humans in his life before – which meant that having his private life back in the company of a human girl might have sounded like an intense, even scary experience to him.
– So – you started – Does this make you nervous?
– I bit… I think.
The blush you noticed on his cheeks made you smile.
In an imitation of Hades’ gesture, you brought you hands to his face, then stood on tip toes to reach his lips with yours: that was your time to assure him.
– If this will be a first time for both of us, let’s take care of it together – you whispered – Sounds good for you?
He laughed at this: seeing you use his words against him was just too funny.
So he decided to join the game.
– Sounds perfect.
#shuumatsu no valkyrie hades#record of ragnarok hades#snv hades#ror hades#hades x reader#snv hades x reader#ror hades x reader#snv x reader#ror x reader#hades snv#hades record of ragnarok#hades ror
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the most wonderful time of the year | kth. (m)
➵ summary : taehyung hasn’t seen you since high school graduation, but when he finds himself in need of a date for his friend’s annual christmas party, running into you is like a godsend; especially when he once had feelings for you, and little did he know, you felt the same way all along.
➵ pairing : taehyung x reader
➵ genre : nonidol!au, f2l, fluff, smut
➵ rating : 18+
➵ word count : 19k
➵ warnings : mutual pining, sexual content, swearing, dom!tae, cuddling resulting in over the clothes stuff, rough fingering, oral (f. receiving), dirty talk, big dick!tae cause we know he’s packing, marking, restraint (with his own hands), choking, begging, unprotected sex (wrap it up peeps), hitting it from the back 😜, mirror (?) sex (reflection of a window), rough sex but then i love you sex, praising, slight humiliation, denied orgasm, creampie, aftercare
part of ksmutclub’s winter project 2020!, using prompt #7: “did everyone else come with a date?”
➵ a/n : thank you to @getmemyfries for beta-reading and constantly reassuring me about this fic, idk where she’s been all my life 😭, but surprise!! would you believe me if i told you guys i grinded this in just 3 days?? because YES i did, 19k in three days as a Christmas gift pretties, happy late holidays!!, comments and feedback are always appreciated <3
“Are you serious, Jimin?”
“Very. I don’t know how you didn’t get the memo, literally everyone was talking about it.”
“Did everyone else come with a date? There has to be at least one person who didn’t.”
“And that one person is you, Tae. Did you forget that I made the theme all about mistletoe? Who did you expect to kiss under it, me?”
“Super funny, Jimin. I just got really busy and I don’t even think I was paying attention to you.”
“Well, it’s your loss now, everyone came with a date and you’ll be third-wheeling the whole night. You can’t blame us either, it’s cuffing season and you know it.”
“Do I really have to come? I’ll just spend Christmas with my family.”
“And ruin their vacation with your annoying ass? What a lovely son, an even better best friend for ditching my party.”
“Okay, Jimin, I get it. Just-fuck, alright, I’ll find someone. Please tell me you didn’t plan anything too couply in case I have to bring an absolute stranger.”
“Hmm, I’ll think about it.”
And Jimin cut the call without a second to spare.
Taehyung stood there baffled, appalled by his best friend for not even having said goodbye. But then again, maybe he really deserved it. Taehyung had just become too busy with his job this year to even think about Jimin and his friends’ party, allowing it to inhabit the back of his mind and loom over him for weeks, though not giving it the time of day he should’ve.
And now he’s stuck in a situation he doesn’t know how to get out of. The party is in just two days, how exactly was he supposed to find someone that would even agree to accompany him?
One, they would have to be someone explicitly bored on Christmas Eve. Two, comfortable with meeting complete strangers and spending an entire night with them. Third, they would have to be willing to even fake-date him.
Taehyung knew he could at least satisfy the third requirement with just a smidge of his charm and good looks, though the real issues were the other two requirements, especially the first one.
Who the fuck is ever doing nothing on Christmas Eve?
These are the exact thoughts that clouded Taehyung’s mind, sighing heavily as he dejectedly sauntered into a coffee shop after work. It wasn’t the usual place, but he decided on a new one in search of a possible partner; even if it were a stranger from a different coffee shop, he’d take what he could get.
It’s precisely why he began scanning the room just enough to discern any potential date as he waited in line. With his hands in his pockets, lips buried into his plaid scarf that draped over his brown winter coat, and attempted to make eye contact with any female he thought eligible.
He spotted some cute girls, though made quick judgements about them not fitting his requirements; some meeting boyfriends, family, yapping away about Christmas plans as though the whole store needed to hear about it.
Pulling out his phone, he considered he had some female friends, maybe co-workers he could convince to tag along. It sounded like a great idea in his head, though when he scrolled though his contacts carefully, he found himself coming up short once again.
Not only had he seen his friends’ stories, all flaunting their very apparent Christmas plans, but even more so his co-workers having literally informed him about either flying back home, meeting family or easing up far, far away on a tropical beach.
And he definitely knew there’d be no one available.
All of it made Taehyung feel deflated once he had placed his order and waited patiently by the store’s counter. He thought he was royally fucked, needed to forego social etiquette and just ask a damn stranger at this point.
Sighing yet again, he mindlessly looked over to the side, catching a glimpse of the person ordering after him with a voice he suddenly recognized. Taehyung’s eyebrows immediately shot to the sky once he took a double-take, a near injustice to say he was only shocked.
He was practically floored, had to rub his eyes a few times just to make sure he wasn’t seeing things. Surely he’d lost it after the gruesome shift he just pulled at work, because he was pondering how in God’s name was he seeing you of all people ordering.
How the hell did you manage to look 100x prettier than you used to, Taehyung thought. It was no doubt you; your smile still charming as ever, your hair still elegantly soft, your eyes still naturally sparkling under every Christmas light in the store just like they always did.
It was really you.
The same you he knew all throughout high school though moved away after graduation, the same you who was brilliant at every subject though could never understand math, the same you who waltzed into school with that plaid winter coat anyone could recognize you for, the same you who always teased him about his love for pineapple on pizza because you could never comprehend the taste.
The same you he once liked.
It was actually you, bundled up in a gray winter coat and white scarf as you smiled a thank you to the barista, eventually making your way over to the counter Taehyung was situated at, settling next to him without having noticed.
Taehyung thought you were an angel sent from heaven, a Godsend, his one and only true saviour once he studied you up close, concluding that you weren’t just some mirage but in fact his real-life friend from years ago who could possibly rescue him from this Christmas party fuck up.
And so he didn’t waste a single, valuable moment, because you know what they say, ‘carpe diem’, oh captain my captain.
“Y/N Y/L/N? Is that you?”
Your surprised eyes snapped towards the oddly familiar low voice, eyebrows shooting up once you resgitered just who exactly said your name. You seemed to be in the same disbelief as Taehyung, himself utterly grateful you’d actually recognized him.
“Oh my God, Kim Taehyung?”
“Yeah, it’s me.” Taehyung laughed shyly. “Damn, how long has it been? 5? 6 years?”
“6 years, yeah.” You confirmed with a smile. “Since graduation.”
“I can’t believe that was 6 years ago, seems just like yesterday.” Taehyung couldn’t wipe the stupid smile off his face remembering the chaotic party by the lake you all threw together, resulting in someone nearly drowning, Taehyung downing more alcohol than he ever had in his life, and you shamelessly shoving everyone into the water until you eventually capsized yourself.
Taehyung had to collect himself to coherently speak sentences again, nearly feeling his neurons incessantly firing off in his brain. “But wow, when did you come back to town?”
“3 months ago, I was transferred for work.” You informed casually, though your sweet smile was infectious. “Wow, I’m.. I can’t believe I ran into you here.” You were honestly still shocked, marveling at the fact you somehow bumped into Kim Taehyung, the Kim Taehyung from high school.
The same Taehyung who teased you about being terrible at math, the same one who only ever brought strawberry jam sandwiches to school and God forbid someone ever took a bite. The same Taehyung who was the cute social butterfly everyone completely adored at school.
The same Taehyung you once liked.
“It doesn’t feel long indeed, but you look.. different.” You did a light scan of him, noticing just how how much taller, more handsome and manlier he appeared. It was reflected in the edge of his jawline, crisp face structure and broader upper body.
Quite frankly, he looked incredibly striking, almost intimidatingly so, and you could only think about when Taehyung used to appear a little scrawnier, lankier though still attractive all the same with his adorable eyes and plushy lips.
It was nearly daunting to see the gorgeous difference now.
“You look different too.. good different.” He added with a smile as he looked you over, and it was pleasant to see he still had that same boxy smile, the same little creases at the corner of his eyes. Though instead now, his smile looked devilishly handsome, and it was hard to not trip over your own feet about it.
“You too. You’re so much taller now.” You commented, craning your neck just to converse with him.
“And you’re still short, huh?”
Your mouth flew open, scandalized at the comment though laughed when he chuckled at your expression. “Oh c’mon, you’re still gonna tease me about how short I am? It’s been six years, Taehyung.”
“Hey, don’t think it’s not payback for all those times you lectured me about how ‘inhuman’ liking pineapple on pizza was. I still have your PowerPoint presentations saved.” Taehyung retorted through a laugh, remembering the way you’d really take the time to conjure up presentations just so he could be unconvinced of the preference.
“Okay, okay. You got me. Is there ever a way I could make it up to you... Assistant Curator Kim?” You read the lanyard that hung around his neck, inspecting it to see his ID photo along with his job title.
“Ah,” Taehyung exclaimed, scrambling for the lanyard. “I was in a rush to get out of work so I left it on by accident.” Taehyung explained a little embarrassed, unhooking it from around his neck.
“Why were you in a rush?” You knitted your eyebrows together, only asking out of innocent curiosity, though Taehyung lit up like a Christmas tree, knowing this was his golden opportunity and he was definitely going to take his chance.
“Uh.. do you still remember Park Jimin and the rest of our friends?” Taehyung started.
“Oh my God, of course I do! You’re all still friends?”
“Unfortunately, yeah. I mean, even when we get tired of each other we know nobody else will put up with us, so we’re still close.” Taehyung snickered, remembering him and his friends were still the same 7 dorks from high school.
“Awh, I wish I could see them, we used to have so much fun together.” You pouted, shoving your hands into your pockets as you recalled amusing memories from years ago; stupid adventures to the lake by your school, chasing the sunset, knowing you probably incessantly bothered the owner of that one gas station you always visited.
“Actually, the reason why I was rushing was because Jimin holds an annual Christmas Eve party, and this time around he made it a ‘bring-a-date’ memo, and I kinda got too busy to remember.” Taehyung began scratching the back of his neck, a little shy considering he didn’t really listen to Jimin when he should’ve.
“Ohh.” You nodded understandingly. “So you forgot to get a date?”
“Yeah.” Taehyung confirmed, nodding with some disappointment in himself. “But say, you mentioned a favour, right?” Taehyung eyed you knowingly, hand never leaving his neck as he forced himself to get the question out. “Are you doing anything on Christmas Eve?”
You were a little taken aback, thinking you knew exactly where he was going with this, and also thinking it was a damn Christmas miracle. You remembered your unfortunate situation for Christmas Eve; your parents having booked a cottage for themselves considering you’d be working that day, though gladly enough your boss decided it was the most wonderful time of the year, so why the fuck would he keep people hostage at work?
It landed you with quite literally nothing to do on the joyous day, and excitement began to fill your chest already about your answer, though you composed yourself to appear normal.
“No, actually. My parents are at a cottage together, so I was going to be home.”
Taehyung could’ve been on cloud nine right about now, thanking God or whatever supreme being for answering his prayers. You’d literally checked off his every requirement perfectly, and now all that was left was...
“Would you like come to Jimin’s party as my date? I know it’s only in 2 days and it’s really sudden, but I’m kinda stuck right now and I promised Jimin I would come after finding someone, he’ll probably kick my ass if I don’t-”
“I’d love to come.” You broke out into a grin at his adorable rambling, nearly giddy your assumption from before was exactly correct.
“Wait, seriously? You mean that?” Taehyung asked in wonderment.
“Why would I lie to you, Taehyung?” You chuckled at the endearing way his face was lighting up, trying to ensure he couldn’t see the stars in your eyes as you looked at him.
“Oh my God, you actually just.. saved my life.” Taehyung reveled, expression of utter gratitude.
“Don’t mention it. It’s all I can do after making you sit through 10 minutes of me berating you for liking fruit on pizza. It’s still weird, by the way.”
“Hey, don’t make me take your drink and ask you to jump for it.” Taehyung chastised, biting back a smile at the fact that you two still bickered like old times.
“Fair point, so in two days, huh?”
“Mhm. Can I get your number, actually? I’ll send you the details tonight.” Taehyung began digging for his phone in his pocket.
“Oh, yeah of course.” You agreed as you went for yours. You both huddled a little closer to exchange the digits, trading phones and adding your names into each other’s contacts. It dawned a slight fuzzy feeling in your chest, getting a whiff of Taehyung’s masculine cologne and realizing in this proximity, just how incredibly ravishing Taehyung had in fact grown up, how much larger and broader he was in comparison to you.
That he was a man now, not the quirky little dork you once knew, and that thought alone caused something to momentarily alight inside you.
He was a man now.
“Remember when we only had iPods and had to talk through our land lines?” Taehyung took a trip down memory lane and grounded you back to Earth, returning your phone to you.
“Ah yes, when technology was just expanding and us 90′s kids were always caught in the weird middle.” You reminisced as he chuckled, recalling the older days.
You were just finishing typing in your name for your contact, nearly clicking save until you decided to add the little bow emoji next to your name, handing Taehyung’s phone back to him.
“A bow?” Taehyung inquired, finding it cute.
“I deserve it, I’m your little Christmas present under your tree, aren’t I?” You flashed him a cute flower pose with a kittenish grin, the barista calling out Taehyung’s order just after.
Taehyung could only smile widely, endeared you still had that same playful charm. “Yeah, you are.” He made for his drink and nabbed it, fixing his phone back into this pocket before addressing you. “I’ve gotta get going. I’ll see you in 2 days, okay? It was seriously great meeting you again. Y/N.”
“You too, I’ll see you then!” You chimed with a wave as Taehyung began stepping away, almost turning from him until he suddenly called out to you one last time, just about through the door.
“Thank you again, Y/N, I owe you, my Christmas present!” He shouted his last words through a stupid smile, you returning the same one as a welcome before Taehyung exited the shop.
And you couldn’t stop yourself from breaking out into the goofiest grin then, cheeks hotter than you remembered. You were glad Taehyung was still the same charismatic, easily lovable person from high school, the same charm and adorable impishness about him.
Only now, he was all grown up and matured, no longer the slightly awkward, though heartfelt kid who liked stealing your history notes. And you became a little afraid feeling the same flutter in your heart from 6 years ago, curious if it was just a momentary lapse upon seeing him again, or signaling the ignition of an old flame it took you years to forget.
Taehyung : remember to bring your competitive side today ;)
You : omg, what did jimin plan?
Taehyung : you’ll have to wait and see
Taehyung : jimin’s a creative one, remember?
You : how could i forget? i’m never forgiving him for making me spend 3 hours writing calligraphy for that anthro project 😭
Taehyung : man, the guys are gonna love seeing you again
Taehyung : be there in 5!
You : gotchu!
You hated that you smiled so stupidly at your screen, never having forgotten the fluttery feeling Taehyung always managed to manifest in your stomach.
You clicked your phone screen off and checked over your outfit for the umpteenth time, wanting to look good not only for Taehyung (though that was the primary reason) but also for the rest of the crew. It’d seriously been too long since you last saw each other, having always been up to dumb shenanigans in high school though sadly parting ways after graduation.
It was only inevitable with everyone’s future plans being so dissimilar, you having gone down the road of law and miraculously scoring a scholarship to a prestigious university a few towns over, spelling your departure from your beloved childhood city and therefore, goodbye to everyone you knew.
You were glad the boys managed to remain so closely-knitted despite their different paths; Taehyung having clearly acquired a job at a museum considering his love for art. Last time you remembered, Jimin was an aspiring dancer, Hoseok was a natural at hospitality, Seokjin always rambled on about acting, Jungkook was gifted with a camera, Namjoon adored books and Yoongi wouldn’t trade music for the world.
It was bittersweet recalling such memories, having to leave behind everything you knew to pursue your own dream. Bitter, though sweet knowing you had larger than life opportunities awaiting you. It was precisely what landed you your current job, working comfortably at a high-status law firm albeit stealing very much of your time.
It was perfect, nonetheless, since the main office was located back home and you had just been transferred 3 months ago, finding your way back 6 years later. You didn’t know if the boys were still in town, had no real clue where their lives went with only stray social media posts indicating they were still alive and healthy.
So running into Taehyung all of a sudden? It made you more than glad, remembering not only your fun times together as a group, but your comfortable friendship with him, and the undeniable feelings you’d developed overtime.
Suffice to say, you both were quirky yet cute, and you made perfect sense. Not only did it land you two a supportive relationship full of laughs and teasing, but also numerous instances where someone’s actions or behaviour became suggestive, questioned the borders of actual friendship between you though nobody willing to take the leap, and it left all your friends inquiring exactly when you two would start dating.
Though that was the sad part, you never did. And the reason why? You have no real clue. It simply never dawned on you to express your feelings towards Taehyung in fear of him not feeling the same, thinking your crush was just a phase and you’d eventually view him as a friend again, a process of denial you repeated for the 4 grueling years of high school.
Though the second you realized you’d have to say goodbye so soon, with the possibility you’d never see him again, you realized Taehyung was the one boy you truly loved, and sometimes questioned if you still did.
It hurt to have to hug him one last time before you disconnected, remembering the way you cried having to part from everyone, and Taehyung held you against him until your eyes dried, waving an innocent goodbye before you rounded the corner of your street and disappeared forever.
To this day you haven’t got a clue if Taehyung ever felt the same, always chalking up his little lingering touches, hugs and double entendres to his naturally flirtatious and outgoing nature. It hindered your ability to say anything, thinking over the years maybe your non-confessional departure was an enormous mistake.
So when you heard the doorbell of your apartment ring, in the five minutes Taehyung promised, your heart couldn't help but leap at the thought you’d see him again, meet all your old friends and spend an entire festive, fun-filled night with them.
You made for the door without a second thought and pulled it ajar, meeting Taehyung’s somehow more stunning self all ready to go. He’d decided today to dress with a tan plaid coat, black turtle neck poking out from underneath paired with black slacks to match; and you realized Taehyung definitely invented the all-black look.
Sources? You.
You almost gawked, his hair set to reveal some forehead though curl just before his eyebrows, and it was evilly handsome. He was evilly handsome.
You remembered he was standing right in front of you, thinking a good moment has passed since you uttered anything, a warm smile as you addressed him. “Hi.”
“Hi.” He greeted back, scanning over you, and you didn’t miss the way his eyes lingered for a second on your legs. You’d gone for your same gray coat, though surprisingly with an all black outfit underneath as well, cute wrap around dress with a v line dipping just generously enough, all paired with pantyhose.
Who cares about a little cold when you want to look cute anyway, right?
“We’re matching, it’s cute.” He complimented, his smile just a little impish as it met your chest momentarily though flashed back up to you.
“I guess you’re cute too.” You shrugged, nearly hiding your face under his scrutiny.
“We should get going, m’lady. Jimin’ll chew my head off if I’m late too.” Taehyung feigned a sophisticated tone, turning aside and holding out his arm for you to loop like a gentleman.
You chuckled just a little and clutched your side bag, hooking onto his arm as you switched the lights of your apartment off and shut the door behind you.
“Now would the kind sir tell me what we’re doing today?” You inquired as Taehyung began walking you down the hallway, peering at his God-like side profile. “You’ve been so mysterious about it.”
Taehyung clicked his tongue disapprovingly. “Now what’s the point of a surprise if I tell you?”
“But why is it a surprise? Don’t tell me it’s something ridiculous like rock climbing.” You playfully scolded, trying to keep up with his long strides as he led you towards the elevator.
“Maybe it’s just to see the way your face will light up when you find out.” Taehyung suggested with narrowed eyes as he looked down at you, you staring back at him in scrutiny until you both snickered.
And as you entered the elevator arm in arm with him, maybe you felt that same skip of your heartbeat from years ago.
“Holy shit, Y/N Y/L/N? Is that you?” Jimin’s face was utterly surprised, his warm, puppy eyes you remember too well wide as he held the door open.
“Of course it is, Park Jimin!” You cheered as you held your arms out for a hug, his gentle arm wrapping around your torso as he beamed.
“The guys are not gonna believe this, I gotta tell em’. Come in, come in!” Jimin ushered you and Taehyung inside, redirecting his attention to the beautiful, open space condo he called his humble abode. “Guys! Come to the front, look who’s here!”
You and Taehyung were propping your boots off when people eventually came piling into the front foyer and responding to Jimin absentmindedly. All were similarly unsuspecting their eyes widened when landing on you, sounding the next slew of hilarious commentary you’d missed too damn much.
“No way, is that Y/N?”
“Holy fuck, Y/N?”
“Y/N, we thought you left town, when did you come back?”
“Taehyung, how the hell did you find her?”
“Even better, how the fuck did he get her to come as his date?” It was Jungkook who made the quip that elicited everyone’s snickering, yourself simply overwhelmed by the amount of memories that came back just by the sound of their quite manlier now, though familiar voices.
They all still had the same charming features, each of them reminiscent of their teenaged selves, but the difference? Now they were polished into captivatingly good-looking men you were baffled to even know at this point.
“Oh my God, it’s been 6 years, just let me hug you guys!” You excitedly gestured for them to come to you, friendly smiles all around as you embraced and reunited.
“Jungkook, why wouldn’t she agree? You trying to say something?” Taehyung didn’t let the earlier insult go, eyebrows quirked as he retorted.
“Dude, Y/N has always been out of your league.” Yoongi added.
“And honestly, now she’s even more out of your league.” Seokjin joined the teasing and it erupted another bout of cackling from the group, you only left to shyly scrunch your nose and giggle.
“Okay, okay, let’s move from standing here, yeah? There’s a party and 6 years worth of catching up to do!” Jimin chimed, chastising everyone huddled by the corridor and allowing you and Taehyung to settle into the home.
Jimin was still the meticulous perfectionist you knew back then, his home adorably charmed with Christmas decorations that made his place feel incredibly warm. His pretty Christmas tree in the corner with some gifts wrapped underneath, his fireplace adorned with pretty stockings, even the small trinkets scattered around were reminding your sadly adult-self that it was indeed Christmas, and it’s meant to be jolly.
It automatically created an atmosphere of festivity, and catching sight of the dates each friend brought moving about, it only felt more like the holidays with 14 people occupying the home.
You were marveling with a wide smile at the scene before you, everyone moving back into the house to resume what they were previously doing until you suddenly felt someone’s hands hook onto the neck collar of your jacket from behind. You whirled around in an instant with seeking eyes, viewing the culprit was none other than the only owner of the largest, most slender hands you still found incredibly attractive.
Goddamn you.
“Sorry, I’ll just take your jacket for you.” Taehyung realized he may have startled you.
“Oh!” You exclaimed, hurriedly shredding off the layer not having noticed you were still wearing it. “I could put it away myself though, give me yours.”
You reached for Taehyung’s jacket in his hands, though he immediately jut the jacket further away from you in protest. “No, no. You’re my date, I’m taking it.”
“But Tae-”
“Hey, you’re my present, remember? You deserve it.” Taehyung mimicked you from your exchange at the coffee shop, you ultimately acquiescing as a result.
“Fine.” You rolled your eyes playfully, though a laugh was pulling at you all the same. “What would you be, though?” You asked out of curiosity. “If I’m the present, what are you?”
Taehyung toyed with your question in his thoughts until he chose the perfect answer, lips growing into a smirk as he drew closer to your face a little. “The one who gets to open it up.”
Something shot through you that was alarming, his cocked eyebrow indicative he was being suggestive, and you played it off with a scoff. “It’s not even Christmas morning yet, and I know you’re just the goodest little boy on Earth who’d wait until he can open his presents.” You clasped your hands together, condescendingly feigning innocence.
“Or maybe you just never got to know, Y/N.” Taehyung then suddenly leaned down much closer to your face, inches from you as he looked into your eyes. “I haven’t always been a good boy.”
Taehyung was boring something undistinguishable into you, though the double meaning of his words left apparent heat in the air between you.
And here it fucking was again, those same double entendres Taehyung had always shot your way though you always took it as him simply fooling around, so you always joined in with your own jokes, assuming the same approach now.
“Hmm, we’ll see about that, Good boy. Santa’s watching.” You countered as you patted his chest sarcastically, causing Taehyung to stand to his full height biting his lip.
He stared at you for a moment before walking away, noticing how long his legs were and the unfair curve of his ass, and you suddenly gained a new feature of his to ogle at. He eventually disappeared and you breathed, temporarily forgetting you had a dumb habit of holding your breath whenever he was so close; his piney with a hint of ocean breeze cologne having been left behind, and hitting you like a truck just as much as his all black outfit did.
God fucking dammit.
You decided to ignore your intrusive thoughts and waltz into the party instead, grabbing yourself a drink and eventually making your way towards some of the boys’ pretty dates. It was refreshing to feel the presence of women, thanking the Heavens they were all relatively sweet and amicable.
Conversation always came easy to you, what with being a lawyer who has to be a master with words anyway, so it wasn’t difficult to not only befriend some of the girls, but also reconnect with the boys merrily, Taehyung by your side.
“Y/N, how dare you not contact any of us about coming back?” Hoseok asked, a little upset timbre in his tone.
“Yeah, I’m actually a little hurt you ended up coming with Tae of all people. After all the books I shared with you?” Namjoon feigned disappointment, a hand to his heart in near heartbreak.
“Dude, what’s wrong with her coming with me? Not my fault you gave her boring ass books.” Taehyung defended.
“Tae, you’d steal her history notes for fuck’s sake.” Namjoon countered with narrowed eyes.
“Guys, it’s been years. I just thought it’d been too long, so I didn’t say anything.” You stopped them, sadly remembering the way communication dwindled out the more you all progressed in your life.
“Look, you’re always welcomed, Y/N. You think I’d forget the girl who pulled an all-nighter just to edit my shitty final essay for English? I told you I’d write your name on my damn tombstone when I got an 80.” Seokjin laughed with a glass of eggnog, though supportive in his remark and it made you reminisce.
“I have no clue to this day how you passed English on just Sparknotes. Jungkook hated English more than you and he still managed to actually read 1984.” You chastised him like old times, though now it was a memory that brought a smile to your face.
“Look, I wasn’t interested in knowing the asshole motives of Big Brother and the 3-minute hate speech.” Seokjin defended himself.
“2-minute, and it was still a good book.”
“You’re telling me 60 pages of that dumb manifesto Winston found was good?” Taehyung perked up with crossed arms, quirking his eyebrows at you in incredulousness.
“Oh c’mon, you learn the entire history of the Party and all their bullshit.”
“And you’re still a nerd, I see.” Taehyung ticked his head to the side with his snarky remark.
“Oh shut up, I got a better mark than you on the final essay anyway.” You rolled your eyes.
“Doesn’t take away from the fact that you’re a nerd.” Taehyung countered.
You gave a disapproving, scrutinizing look as you marched your way over to Jimin’s Christmas tree, comically gesturing to the Balsam Fir beside you. “I’m literally your Christmas present under the tree, Taehyung, you have to be nice to me.” You chastised him though it only made the boys looking on crack up.
“Y/N, you’re still hilarious as fuck.” Hoseok was lighting up with laughter, his pretty giggles sounding in a way that honestly made you giggle in the end too, Taehyung only letting up because you were just so you, and it tugged at his heart strings.
“Speaking of Jungkook from earlier, where is he? I just remembered the math notes he owes me his life for.” You perked up, gauging his presence around in the condo.
“He’s over there eating the chocolate chips, yah, Jungkook! Stop it!” Seokjin scolded from across the room where Jimin and Yoongi were bustling about in the kitchen, and you became confused hearing the mention of chocolate chips.
“Chocolate chips? I mean, I’m not complaining, but that’s quite the eccentric choice for party food.” You held up your hands in mock surrender.
“Oh, Taehyung didn’t tell you? It’s for the competition later.” Namjoon informed, though you only furrowed your eyebrows.
“Competition?”
“Yeah, baking competition. Jimin planned a couple’s one for his mistletoe theme. I’m beating all your asses, by the way. I’m a genius at decorating.” Hoseok folded his arms with a self-satisfied expression.
“Please, my girlfriend and I hold weekly bake-offs, watch yourselves, losers.” Seokjin calmed everyone down with his own greatness, you simply becoming beyond excited.
You turned to Taehyung in an instant, expression completely telling of wonder as you inquired with a high-pitched tone. “Tae, you didn’t tell me we were having a baking competition, that’s so cool!” You beamed, elatedly looking towards Jimin and Yoongi preparing ingredients.
“Taehyung’s a cryptic one, remember?” Namjoon joked, trying to stifle a laugh with a hand over his mouth, and Taehyung immediately defended himself.
“Shut up, hyung.” He sounded offended, though the smile tugging at his lips indicated after years of friendship, he’d never actually grow vexed at his admirable friend.
Taehyung then met your eyes, smile growing more apparent, warmer. “I told you it was to see the way your face would light up, didn’t I?” He tilted his head to the side then, eyes playfully studying you as he confirmed his observation. “Yup, your eyes totally still sparkle the same.”
You couldn’t help but fill with another wave of fuzziness, feeling as though Taehyung always knew how to make your insides all giddy, and maybe even thinking what’s so wrong if your feelings really were coming back?
You could only smile sheepishly at him, the rest of the boys knowingly watching the two of you like they have for years, everyone only falling out of the trance of the moment when Jimin’s voice called out from the kitchen.
“Alright Martha Stewarts, who’s starting the ass-kicking?”
“Hyung! That’s not fair, you can’t steal from us!” Jungkook scolded him as you watched the mania in front of you, Seokjin and his girlfriend Sa-Ha vs. Jungkook and his date Mira. It was becoming devastatingly hilarious, both teams only having 1 minute left until their cookies had to be plated in tip-top shape, all scrambling to create the best-looking ones.
“I can and I will, you stole from us first!” Seokjin rebutted him, Jimin raising his voice to signal how much left time was.
“30 seconds you guys, make it count!” And it was another catastrophic seconds until the timer went off, both teams exhausted and complaining all the same about their hard time fueled by Jin and Jungkook’s endless bickering.
It was laughs for the few of you looking on, waiting your turns until Jimin’s date Song-i chose from the hat of pairings, your eyes going wide once she called out your name with Taehyung’s against Hoseok and his date.
“Oh my God, Tae, that’s us!” You grabbed his arm alarmed, seeming nervous and it caused him to look at you.
“Why are you so nervous? We’ll do great.”
You scoffed at him in protest. “Taehyung, you did horrible in home ec, we’re gonna lose!”
“Hey, I’ll make you jump for the ingredients, have some faith, will you?” Taehyung retorted, grabbing you by your hand and dragging you over to one of the two counters Jimin’s grand condo had to offer.
“We’re taking you guys down on decorations, I’m a genius.” Hoseok gloated from his counter, tying his apron as he eyed you.
“I have a curator on my team, Hobi, we’re beating you.” You scrutinized him with an angry pout as he stuck his tongue out, you whirling back around to adjust your apron.
“Okay everyone, aprons on?” Jimin inquired, you having put on yours though watching Taehyung struggle with figuring out the apparently rocket-science contraption.
You sighed with a laugh until you grabbed it from his hands, helping him out. “It’s like this, Tae.” You got on your tippy-toes to situate the apron around his neck as he bent down for you, the contrast of your heights always having made Taehyung a little weak.
He was only left to watch you as you fixed the apron onto him, finding himself not even watching anymore, but straight up gazing, admiring.
Admiring the way your eyes were always in a state of perpetual sparkle, your small lips he never forgot the amount of times he contemplated kissing, your dress revealing your collarbones and chest that beckoned for him to just tear it off, all weakening him even more so.
What made him even weaker, however, was noting the way you’ve matured into a woman after 6 years.
A very beautiful, attractive woman.
Your body had always been art to him, but now you were polished into a masterpiece he desired to adore, run his hands all over. Your face structure was more evened out, hair set to fall elegantly upon your shoulders and neck so utterly inviting it all added a sense of sexy maturity to you.
It was distracting, Taehyung venturing off on the thought you were a woman now, not the innocent, sweet nerd he once knew, and it constantly began to rack his brain when he felt something course through his veins about it.
Because you used to be so painfully innocent, so naturally a girl next door he couldn’t help but want to taint sometimes, to ruin and unravel for his own. He could even feel it with every time your smaller hands touched his body as you worked the apron guilelessly, wanting to snatch up your wrists instead and do unspeakable things, especially with that fucking dress on his mind.
What made it all worse is that Taehyung could tell you only acted guileless, and never actually were. You also made your own suggestive comments, always caught his drift and he could tell you weren’t the innocent little thing you appeared to be.
Taehyung was so completely lost he heard you suddenly calling his name.
“Taehyung, are you listening?”
He blinked. “Huh?”
“You have to listen to what I say, okay? Just follow my instructions and we’ll win against them.” You made little fists in the air to encourage him, Taehyung mimicking the action.
“Y-yeah. I will, let’s do this.” You turned around after smiling sweetly, fixing some of the utensils on the counter and completely unsuspecting of Taehyung’s thoughts.
That even after 6 years apart, after thinking he’d successfully forgotten about you, there was still something that pulled at his heart every time he saw you smile, every time you were ever near him.
And he came to the conclusion maybe his feelings really haven’t changed from 6 years ago.
“Taehyung, can you pass me the butter, please?” You asked urgently, whisking away at your bowl of almost-there cookie dough with Taehyung hovering around you as he watched.
“Got it.” He returned with some of the butter, you struggling to scoop some of it until Taehyung reached out for the block. “Here, let me do it and you whisk.”
“No, you’ll end up putting in too much. Let me do it.” You nudged him with your elbow, picking at the butter.
“But you’re already whisking, just let me take it out.” Taehyung protested as he reached, though you blocked him right away.
“No, Tae, remember we decided I’m on baking and you’re on decorating?”
“Your job is way harder than mine and I’m useless right now, let me at least whisk.” Taehyung grabbed for the bowl until you snatched it away from him, already done with scooping the butter when the action caused some of the flour to fly up on your dress, gasping scandalously.
“Taehyung!” You whined, Taehyung scrambling for a quick apology.
“Oh fuck, Y/N, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean-” Taehyung almost completed until a splash of flour went hurtling onto his shirt, causing him to look down with his mouth agape. “You did not just throw flour on my black turtleneck.”
“You got flour on my black dress first, you tree.” Your eyebrows were set hard as you scolded him, still loosely whisking away at the cookie dough.
“It was by accident, you half-pint.” Taehyung rebutted, trying to bat the flour off himself.
“Then mine was an accident too.” You mocked him, unsuspectingly whisking again when flour suddenly hit your chest, offended to find Taehyung snickering with it all over his hand.
“That was an accident, too.”
“You’re so...” You huffed out as you placed the bowl down and grabbed your own handful of flour, just about to throw it on Taehyung when is large palms came up to snatch your wrists, forcing your arms back as he snickered.
“Taehyung, this is unfair!” You complained, struggling against his hold.
“It’s an accident.” Taehyung mimicked with a genuine laugh watching you scramble in his hold, until the smile wiped off his face shortly after when you simply released the flour from your palm and it spilled all over his turtleneck.
Your cheeks puffed up trying to contain your laughter, Jimin’s own giggling fit sounding and you remembered he was monitoring the competition. “Taehyung, you dumbass, you had that shit coming.” He held his stomach, entire body laughing at his best friend.
You were giggling along with Jimin until Taehyung had had enough, licking his lips with mischief.
“That’s it, come here.” He then spun you around and engulfed you with his arms from behind, holding you snug to his chest as you tried to escape him alarmingly, knowing what Taehyung was going to do next.
“Taehyung please, wait, I beg of you, don’t!” And it was already too late when you felt his long fingers begin to tickle at your sides, your incessant protests melding with giggles along with his beautiful laughter filling the kitchen.
You continued to fight against his hold, the constant feather-like touches making you reel and breath leave your lungs. “Taehyung, stop! Oh my God,” you struggled through a laugh while he nuzzled his face into your hair. “I’ll die, Taehyung, please!”
“Nope, this is what you get.” Taehyung continued his onslaught as he held you tighter, you beginning to acquiesce in order to reason with him.
“Okay, okay, look. We’re running out of time!” You tried controlling your laughter, tears pricking at your eyes as you tried to calm down. “We have to beat Hobi and Ah-yeong or else we’ll lose!”
His amused voice sounded near your ear, still reprimanding you. “I’ll only stop if you say sorry.”
“Alright, I’m sorry!” You were grabbing at his wrists for release. “I didn’t mean it, just stop tickling me!” You protested with a giggle until you felt his fingers rest, rather exchanging it for simply encasing you.
“Good girl, you’re getting on Santa’s nice list.” Taehyung joked.
You could only sigh as you resupplied oxygen to your lungs, moving towards the bowl. “Okay, let’s get back to work before we lose.” You puffed out air, breaths levelling as you returned to the counter and grabbed the whisk and bowl, only to find Taehyung hadn’t retracted his arms yet.
He instead remained behind you, reaching for the utensils in your hands, his large ones grasping them along with you and the contrast of his broad body enclosing your smaller one made you feel something in your core.
Your eyes widened in surprised when his head unexpectedly found your shoulder, resting his chin there as he peered down at the bowl before you, you sputtering. “Taehyung, w-what are you doing?”
“Helping you, is there a problem?” The deep cadence of his voice was just by your ear, dangerous for your health.
“N-no. But it’s okay, I’m fine on my own-”
“Nope, this is the least I can do for you..” Taehyung’s tone seemed to trail off suddenly, having calmed down from his laughter and you found him speaking in earnest. “You’re my Christmas present I dragged all the way here with me, remember?”
You could only smile sympathetically as you looked to your side, eyes welcomed by his gorgeous side profile on full display just centimeters from you. It made you realize just how close he was, his warmth engulfing you and it caused little sparks to fly inside your chest.
“It’s not so bad, Taehyung. You’re just a good boy who needed his little Christmas present.” You teased light-heartedly, proud of your remark until Taehyung suddenly turned towards your ear, ghosting the shell of it with an unexpectedly darker tone, low and down right gruff.
“I’m not always a good boy.” He stated it simply, though the hot baritone in his words oddly left your spine cold, freezing over even more when Taehyung then wrapped his arms entirely around your torso, pulling your back to his chest. He did it so tightly you could suddenly feel your ass pressed to his covered length, oddly contradicting how couple-like you two probably appeared and it was goddamn intoxicating.
You panicked at first but eventually basked in his hold, mustering the courage to speak with a suggestive tone. “I’m not always a good girl, either.”
You threw it out there, cheeks slightly heating adding your own double entendre, though the way Taehyung suddenly tensed for a second had you feeling more confident, the puff of air he sucked in apparent.
The conversation only ended with a satisfied hum from Taehyung as he watched you bake, a nice rumble that reverberated from his chest and into your back, feeling an odd arousal spike all the way down to your toes.
It was already lethal with his pretty hands holding around your waist, the closeness an added thrill. It made your chest fill with something riveting, almost anticipatory of what all of this meant between you two, excited for wherever this night would truly go.
It wasn’t long before it came time for Taehyung to plate and decorate the cookies, carefully placing his little embellishments he swore were the cream of the crop as you bickered with him, your incessant teasing resulting in you hugging him from behind while he worked.
And Taehyung knew he was doomed the second he felt your very obvious chest press into his back, his nerves pumping carnally as he then felt a side of him he’s always hid from you escape its reigns.
It was damn transparent Seokjin and his girlfriend would win, their exquisite baking and cooking skills having created masterpieces everyone dug into happily. It’d won them the choice of what movie everyone would watch tonight along with a dinner that the losers, surprisingly not you and Taehyung, but Namjoon and his date would have to pay for.
Everyone was now seeking comfortable positions for the movie around the TV while you were last minute cleaning with Jimin in the kitchen, offering your help after the mess you and Taehyung made with your little flour mishap.
Taehyung had properly gotten rid of the flour on his sweater, now lounging on an armchair in the living room with his phone in hand. You felt yourself glancing towards him more than you should’ve, reprimanding yourself each time though found yourself doing it nonetheless.
It was just hard to keep your eyes off him when Taehyung was the epitome of a Greek God, questioning how such a being is allowed to walk among us commoners. His chiseled jawline was far too handsome for his own good, his neck sculpted so perfectly it left you you wondering what it would feel like to mark him up all over, and the way his long legs were manspreading before him was so inviting the sight alone made you figuratively drool.
And fall even harder.
You didn’t realize you were ogling until Jimin’s hushed voice pulled you out of your reverie. “You’re staring.”
You blinked. “What?”
Jimin chuckled as he continued to wipe the counter one last time. “It’s been 6 years, why don’t you just say something?”
“There’s nothing to say, Jimin.” You tried brushing him off, though Jimin didn’t buy it.
“My ass, Y/N. You really think after what happened in the kitchen there’s nothing between you two?”
“I don’t know, it’s just how Taehyung is.” You concocted an excuse, deflating as you did so.
Jimin shook his head in disapproval. “It’s been like this since high school, Y/N, why didn’t you just tell Taehyung how you felt?”
You looked at him in earnestly before softening into a sigh, knowing Jimin was really the only person you ever spilled your feelings for his best friend to.
“Because I was scared, Jimin. You know how hard it was for me to even admit it to you.” You answered with a quiet voice, scrapping the flour you threw at Taehyung into the garbage.
“But Y/N, you two... the way you are. What were you so afraid of?” Jimin’s sweet, pacifying voice asked, clearly having been rooting for you both ever since you fessed up.
“Rejection, Mimi. Even if we’re like that...” You trailed, thinking over your relationship with Taehyung. “What if it’s all only a joke on his end? Taehyung has always been naturally flirty.. and we’re friends. I don’t think I’m any different than a conquest.”
Jimin understood your point, though made it his own to advise you otherwise, washing out the cloth in the sink. “Y/N, that’s only what you believe.” His eyes told you of genuine support, offering like the comfort fairy he’s always been. “Just because you believe something, doesn’t make it true.”
And that damn well hit home for you, realizing that maybe you’ve really been in your head too much about this, overthinking by creating doubts and excuses in your head to subdue your fear of confessing to Taehyung, to avoid the hurt of rejection but possibly missing an entire opportunity.
“You should tell him, Y/N. It’s been long enough, you’ll never know how he feels if you don’t try.”
You became apprehensive. “But how do you know if he’ll feel the same way?” Jimin could only chuckle to himself, his smile radiant as he found you the most innocent, yet funnily oblivious thing on Earth.
“Look at the way he acts around you, Y/N.” Jimin advised. “He’s my best friend, and I’ve never seen him like that with anyone except you. Conquests are conquests, but you’re you, and that’s different to him.”
Your mind instantly went into a frenzy, thinking well fuck, Jimin is Taehyung’s best friend, and he’s telling you that all this time Taehyung has never really enacted the same behaviour and energy with anyone expect you? This whole time? What does he mean you’re different? You’re.. different to him? Aren’t you just his female friend he’s known since ninth grade, and so surely there’s nothing but the added value of history there, right?
Right?
You were only left to digest Jimin’s words as you placed the dustpan back to its original spot, Jimin finishing up with the sink. The conversation ended there, Jimin guiding you back to the living room and nestling himself next to his date. You were distracted with Jimin’s suggestions until you walked into the space and realized there was nowhere for you to sit, the couples perfectly paired up and occupying all the available space.
Your entrance is what made Taehyung snap his vision to you from his phone, watching your confused face contemplating where to sit until he whispered to you, motioning towards himself on the armchair furthest from the screen and tucked behind the other couches. “Y/N, come here.”
You studied his placement, on a singular armchair with his lap very much open. You shivered at the sight, though protested in a hushed tone realizing the chair could really only fit him. “There’s nowhere for me to sit.”
Taehyung then spread his legs a little further apart and tapped his thigh, revealing some space for you to sit.. on him. “You can sit here.”
You were glad the lights were turned off, just so Taehyung didn’t have to see the blush that rose to your cheeks when you answered. “Um, o-okay.”
You then ambled over to him in front of the rather comfy looking armchair, thanking God everyone was too distracted bickering over Seokjin’s movie choice to pay attention to you both.
“Are you.. sure about this?” You managed to get out, mind going feral over the fact that one of your previous thoughts was actually manifesting itself, nearly chickening out.
“Mhm, just sit on me.” Taehyung offered casually, his expression unreadable and ultimately making you doubt Jimin’s advice from before, realizing that Taehyung has always been a hard person to read, which is why you could never tell how he felt about you, shutting your trap about damn love confessions.
You didn’t respond and rather tentatively made it to the take your seat, the seat that was Taehyung’s fucking lap. You placed your ass on his thigh with your legs thrown over him, angling yourself so that the temple of your head rested against his shoulder.
Though it proved to be lethal in seconds, his cologne now completely flooding your nostrils and the thin skirt of your dress leaving much of your clothed core feeling the muscle of his thigh.
You felt Taehyung tense underneath for a second as you adjusted the skirt of your dress over your own thighs, smoothing it over properly as your hands then clasped in your own lap.
Taehyung was glad you didn’t have the ability to read his mind, because the second he realized everyone was naturally pairing up to cuddle with their dates, it would only mean you two would have to do the same. So when you paddled over, standing before him in that cute dress he’s been wanting to tear off you this entire party, he was more than thrilled to offer his lap as your seat.
But when you actually sat on him, your ass and hints of your core against his thigh with your tempting legs draped over him, he was continuously beginning to think dangerously, salaciously.
He tried to keep his breathing leveled, though the second he felt you adjust against him and your covered center press onto him, he knew he would never survive whatever fucking movie everyone eventually settled on.
When it finally began to play, Taehyung snaked his arms around your waist and held you to him, feeling your breath hitch for the tiniest second before you relaxed.
And it damn well thrilled him.
The movie was beginning to progress now, Taehyung and yourself in the same comfortable position until you yawned and snuggled more into him, a hand coming up to drape across his chest and head finding shelter closer into his neck.
Taehyung tensed again, feeling every breath you took with the weight of your smaller body on top of him, mind racing with thoughts he couldn’t keep quiet anymore.
And especially when you shifted your ass a little against his leg, he twitched with something so much more carnal, blood pumping somewhere it shouldn’t and this time, Taehyung didn’t really feel like holding back anymore.
His hands suddenly faltered, his palms coming to singularly rest against one of your thighs, clasping it slightly. He knew there was nothing but your leg with only pantyhose as a barrier for your skin, sending currents through his veins thinking you could definitely feel his every touch.
You nearly jolted when Taehyung’s hands met the meat of your thigh, the placement shooting more arousal through you than it should’ve.
You were calm until Taehyung suddenly inched his hand towards the inner part of your thigh, making your core clench and hand clutch his sweater to contain the electricity it sent.
You’ve always had such dirty thoughts about what Taehyung’s hands could do, the slenderness and length of his fingers always revving your imagination. So to have his fingers just on the inside of your thigh, sitting in his lap as he seemed to be teasing, was enough to send your brain spiraling.
Your scandalous thoughts made you shift against him to experimentally feel the friction, your core grinding against his thigh for a moment and Taehyung’s breath immediately hitched. His grip on you tightened and his hold tensed, had you suppressing the feeling of making a sound.
He slid more inward, closer to the prize he was seeking and you could only hide your face into the junction of his neck at the way your pussy felt butterflies. It made you squish your thighs together to feel something, and God fuck, was the tension between you two so searing you could feel it radiating off Taehyung’s body.
It’s what made whispering slowly against him flow easily, quiet so as not to alarm anyone in the living room.
“I thought you were a good boy, Tae. What are you doing?” Your voice was sultrier than you planned, and it wasn’t chastising him at all, rather teasing for something more.
You could only feel the rise and fall of Taehyung’s chest underneath you as he contained himself, the cuddling leaving you to feel his every micro-movement when he responded.
“I thought you were a good girl, what are you doing?” Taehyung’s voice was low and deep, the vibration coursing through your body and it only invited you to become hornier.
“Guess I’m not a good girl after all.”
Taehyung made a sound as though scoffing, dangerous in its tone.
“Guess I’m not a good boy, either.” And just after, Taehyung inched his fingers even closer to your clothed core, making the slightest of contact on your slit through the material of your dress and you practically twitched in his hold, sucking in a breath as you clasped onto the fabric of his shirt.
“You have no idea..” Taehyung suddenly spoke up, voice laden with something hungry, hot. “what I’ve always thought about doing to you.”
You could only jolt in his lap, more of his cologne meeting your nose and it caused you to suppress a sound by stuffing your face into his neck. “What.. have you thought about?”
Taehyung then suddenly cupped your sex over your clothes, making you grapple onto his neck and bite back a moan so hard you had to breathe through your nose.
“How I want to ruin you.” Taehyung’s low baritone and rough palm rubbing teasingly against your now aching pussy left you gushing, arousal racking the bottom of your stomach you were almost afraid of how easy it was for him.
Your breath was shallower now, trying to compose yourself by egging him on. “You’d want to ruin an innocent girl like me?”
“I know you’re not innocent, princess.” Taehyung asserted with the slightest growl to his tone, thankful your seat was positioned behind the rest of the others so nobody could see what was going on.
“Only when it comes to you.” Your seductive voice beckoned lust to course through Taehyung, breathing out hot air. “What else?” You suddenly croaked out.
Taehyung hummed lowly into your ear, his palm smoothing over your cunt in ways that had you screwing your eyes shut. “How I want to make you beg.” He purposefully pressed harder against your clit, had you scratching into the column of his throat. “Make you scream my name.”
You gushed your arousal even more, breathless with your words. “I bet you say that to everyone.”
Taehyung chuckled dismissively, dipping his head lower to whisper darkly into your ear.
“I only say that to pretty little things I want to ruin, and you’re the prettiest little thing I know.”
Your breath came out in a weighty puff, sighing satisfyingly against him as you snaked your hand from his neck down to the hardening length in his pants. You grazed your palm over his clothes and he twitched almost violently, biting back his hiss with a strong grip against your thigh with his free hand. You grew proud, speaking up when it boosted your ego.
“I’d love to see you try.”
And that was when the pads of Taehyung’s fingers pressed into your clothed cunt so euphorically you were seconds from letting out a moan, Taehyung cupping his palm over your mouth to silence you.
“Shh.” Taehyung sounded by your ear. “Can’t let everyone hear my girl, now can I?” He hushed you huskily, leaving you to sigh your arousal into his large palm and eternally grateful the movie’s volume was loud enough to mask your talking.
Taehyung then began the slowest circular ministrations on your clit, shooting continuous pleasure through your body as you clutched your hand onto his wrist holding your mouth, urgently trying to suppress moans he was easily milking out of you.
It felt like sparks, continuous sparks in your covered pussy as Taehyung rubbed against your folds, gliding down to your slit and teasing your throbbing hole.
The mere prospect of his fingers shoving inside you made you wet beyond comprehension, only digging little crescents into his forearm with muted moans. It was sickening how easily he had you turned on, how easily you were getting riled up by just his fingers, and so you mustered the strength to lightly stroke his cock over his pants as revenge.
Taehyung then put pressure against your clenching hole as punishment, shoving your face into his neck when he teased your entrance and squishing his hand between your thighs with his other urging them open.
“Look at you,” Taehyung growled. “all fucked out just by my fingers.” He whispered darkly into your ear, the vibration of his baritone voice once again sending you into overdrive. “They’re not even inside you yet.”
The ‘yet’ had you restless, body grinding against him and this time it was Taehyung trying suppress a satisfied groan.
“If my fingers have you like this, imagine my-”
“Oh c’mon! That’s not even realistic!” Seokjin suddenly shouted at the screen, startling you and Taehyung.
“Jin, calm down. It’s just a feel-good Christmas movie.” Yoongi cautioned him.
“How the fuck does the kid just free the burglar from the cop car? It’s damn common sense.” Seokjin complained about the scene from Christmas with the Kranks, having been unsatisfied with the movie since the beginning.
“Baby, why’d you choose this movie?” He whined to his girlfriend Sa-Ha, her feigning innocence as she defended herself.
“It’s almost over, Jinnie. Just sitand watch.”
And that’s when Taehyung ripped his hands off you, leaving you to breathe out ruggedly for a few seconds before your vision looked up at Taehyung’s, mutually shocked at what the fuck just happened.
You’ve never done something like that before, and as your scared sights looked back at each other, you could only think you were both under some sort of horney trance that swept you two into uncharted waters.
It made you divert your eyes from Taehyung immediately, your mind going blank.
Taehyung was left hard and extremely turned on, though began dissipating once he couldn’t fathom he went that far with you so quickly, his brain having been clouded by lust he should’ve kept in check.
And with the way you looked at him, panicked and snapping your vision away in an instant, he doesn’t know if he just made a grave mistake.
You both became shameful, swallowing dryly as your attentions fixated back onto the screen, thinking about what just transpired.
There was this incessant feeling in both your chests contemplating there was something more, clearly more between you two.
And it was downright fearful.
“Yah, why are you guys leaving so early? C’mon! There’s still half the eggnog left.” Seokjin pouted from across the room, sadly chugging his drink as the others hummed in agreeance.
“Yeah, c’mon guys. It’s the holidays, let’s all spend it together, sleep over for the fuck of it!” Hoseok chimed in what you could tell was an inebriated state, practically swaying as he talked and the lilt in his tone ever-so cheery.
“Um, excuse me? Sleep over? Nobody’s doing that.” Jimin shoot him down from where he stood near you and Taehyung, scolding his friends with crossed arms. “If they want to leave they’re allowed, we already made Y/N abandon her Christmas for us.”
“It’s alright, Jimin. I missed you guys too, I wanted to come.” You offered sentimentally, hand touching his elbow to let him up and he eased.
“Since you’re officially back in town, we’re never leaving you alone again, Y/N!” Namjoon called out from the living room, engrossed in whatever was playing on the TV.
“Yup, seriously not going to leave you alone.” Yoongi hummed with half-lidded eyes, near falling asleep on the couch.
“I still owe you for those math notes, expect me becoming your Genie for a day!” Jungkook called out from the kitchen, most likely munching on the treats everyone crafted during the competition earlier.
“Of course, I’ll see you guys! Merry Christmas!”
“Merry Christmas!” Everyone cheered, their dates similarly adding on.
You then brought your attention back to Jimin, seeing you and Taehyung out as the wonderful host of today’s party. “Thank you for the party, Jimin, it was amazing.”
“Yeah.” Taehyung perked up next to you, apologetic he was so negligent of the party in the first place. “It was seriously fun, Jimin, I’m sorry I acted like it wasn’t a big deal before.”
“Nah, don’t sweat it.” Jimin casually waved him off. “Dude, you could text me a Merry Christmas and I’d be alright, you know us.” Jimin smiled reassuringly, right on your toes when Taehyung and yourself stepped into his front foyer.
You were both fixing on your shoes just before Jimin’s door when he spoke up again. “It was great having you guys, and even better having you, Y/N, come here.” Jimin held out his arms for a warm hug, you returning it merrily. “You’re always welcomed here with us, visit anytime you want.”
“Thanks, Jimin, it really means a lot.” Your grateful eyes found his once you disconnected.
“We’ll get going now, thank you again, Jimin.” Taehyung for some odd reason placed an arm around your shoulder, pulling you two a little closer and you simply accepted the action, trying not to read into it.
“Of course.” Jimin replied. “Though one last thing, you remember the theme of this party, right?” Jimin asked you both, you and Taehyung similarly responded with knitted eyebrows.
“Yeah?”
“Well look up, lovebirds.” Jimin cocked his head upwards towards the ceiling, casually leaning against the corridor of his entrance when you and Taehyung glanced up, innocently viewing the little mistletoe dangling above your heads, eyes reflecting the realization of what Jimin was conveying.
“I’ll leave you two alone.” Jimin added with a purposefully hushed, knowing tone. He was just about turning away until he called out in caution. “Oh, careful driving, by the way. I just heard the snow got bad.” And with that, Jimin left nothing but his sweet cologne in the air when he disappeared.
You and Taehyung shuffled about a little, not exactly daring to exchange gazes when the air became all stuffy.
You were both mutually pondering what the absolute hell to do in this moment. Do you kiss? Do you not kiss? Do you awkwardly try to address what happened earlier after silently agreeing with your dicey body language to never speak of it again? Or hell, do you damn well take Jimin’s advice and just flat out tell him you’ve always had feelings for him?
Wait.
Jimin’s advice.
It came back to you, thinking Jimin was actually extremely wise in what he said. You took to his words into consideration, studying some of the little things Taehyung did around you, from the things he uttered all the way down to the simple way he even looked at you, contemplating something, just something had to be there.
But then maybe, just maybe you could also chalk it up to his naturally flirtatious behaviour you’ve always observed, always habitually affectionate with people and that’s what’s always made him so easily lovable in the first place, what made Taehyung a boy who was born to be loved.
And he was tricky, his expressions and feelings always indistinguishable with the composed, nuanced way he carried himself especially now, convincing you reading him was a lost cause.
Though as you glanced at Taehyung right now, visibly nervous, his usually schooled face and unreadable expression now indicating nerves, awkwardness you two have never really experienced between each other before, you decided maybe you should stop making excuses.
Stop avoiding signs and doubting his every move and burying your feelings so deep underground, that maybe you should just fucking take your leap of faith already.
So you stepped closer to him, your figure almost laughably smaller compared to him, and watched as his pretty eyes brightened in surprise at you.
It only took a few seconds, for your lips to curve reassuringly, for your soft hands to cup his face delicately against the edge of his sharp jaw. To get on the tip of your toes and bring your lips to Taehyung’s, pressing a heartfelt kiss to mouth.
A kiss so very soft and tender, it was like teenagers kissing for the very first time, and it made you giggle on the inside, thinking that’s exactly how your entire ordeal has felt like; your two teenage selves trying to navigate whatever feelings lied between you.
Taehyung was shocked, having been silently berating himself for being too bold too quickly and thinking his abandonment of chivalry in that instance was wrong, the air between you having been tainted with a sense of unspoken, though apparent awkwardness for the rest of the party.
But now, now you were kissing him, and for the first time, his insides leaping at just the prospect. It felt like a damn dream, though the press of your mouth against his confirmed it was in fact real, that it was gladly his sweet reality.
That after years of imagining what it would feel like, he’s kissing the girl he’s loved since the second he saw her hair glow in the rays of the sunset, the minute he realized she wasn’t just pretty, but beautiful to him, the hour he’d witness the moonlight kiss her skin when she stayed up with him on sleepless nights, leading all the way up to the year he realized she’d leave him, so soon, so fucking soon it absolutely crushed him.
And Taehyung wouldn’t admit it you, but your departure left his heart ravaged for quite possibly years, continuously overthinking how different things would’ve been if he just told you. Told you how he felt, told you that behind every innuendo, behind every hug, every tease, every stupid smile he flashed your way, that there was love behind it all.
Pure, unadulterated love.
He regretted it for months, for years thinking he’d truly lost the greatest opportunity in his life having let you go without protest, without fighting for you like he should’ve.
It hurt, it hurt until he’d eventually grown accustomed to the ache in his heart whenever he saw that same plaid pattern on anyone else, reminded of the jacket you wore to school everyday. The way he found himself subconsciously comparing nearly every girl he dated to you, how on rainy days and quiet nights, he sometimes wondered where you were, what you were doing, if you were awake at this time of night like he usually was, remembering the way the moonlight always seemed to love you, just like he loved you.
And he still did, Taehyung thought. He still loved you, now feeling your lips kiss him, your adorable height making you tippy-toe, the gentle way you held his face comforting.
Your lips then disconnected, Taehyung seeing your gaze was warm, something so reminiscent of affection, adoration in your eyes, and he thought in that one, singular moment that maybe, just maybe...
You loved him too.
“Fuck, this snow is bad.” Taehyung swore as he gauged any clear path of the road ahead.
“I hate to admit this, but the group was right. It was probably better staying at Jimin’s.” You sighed, worried about the amount of damn white you were seeing blanket the world outside.
“I thought if we left early we could escape it, but shit, mother nature is always so fickle.” He complained.
“It’s her charm, unfortunately.” You shrugged, realizing there was truly no way for you to get home now. “It’s early too, the snow ploughs won’t clear the roads just yet.” There was suddenly a concerned lilt to your tone as you peered ahead, gripping Taehyung’s arm and it grabbed his attention. “It’s getting dangerous too, Tae. I don’t want you driving in this.”
Taehyung was glad he had the gifted ability of hiding his emotions, because right now he would’ve been embarrassingly over the moon. He smiled back to you reassuringly, then contemplated an alternative.
“Would you.. rather come to my place?” Taehyung inquired, biting his lip once he realized he stupidly stuttered.
You blinked. “What?”
“Well, my place is much closer, and it’d be less dangerous driving there. You can just stay until they clear the roads.” Taehyung relayed casually, expectant eyes on you as his hands tapped against the steering wheel.
Your face slowly turned into an appreciative smile, taken aback by his act of kindness, but also felt something exciting tickle the bottom of your stomach.
“Sure, I’d love that.”
Taehyung shut the door of his apartment as you removed your boots, shredding stray snowflakes off his jacket when he spotted similar ones on yours, his hands naturally jutting out to rid the tiny icicles off you.
You turned around at his touch, thanking him and he smiled a welcome back. He’d taken your jacket just like before and tucked them away into his closet, gesturing towards his living room for you to get comfortable.
“Make yourself at home, do you want water or anything?”
“Yeah, actually. Water would be nice.” Taehyung nodded as he made for his kitchen, you tucking the skirt of your dress underneath you as you took your humble seat on his couch.
His home was so painfully Taehyung, it had you smiling like an idiot he was still the same. The same introspective Taehyung who adored art and photography, the same Taehyung who absolutely hated shoes and you could tell just by the way he abandoned them earlier he still had the same habit. Even to the way his house reflected this artistic, calming, and nuanced feeling he similarly had.
It drew you to admire some of the pieces draping his walls, when Taehyung returned with a glass of water, handing it to you as he plopped down on the couch. “Here.”
“Thank you.” You took the glass, gulping down some of the liquid for your parched throat.
“Your apartment is nice.”
“Thanks.”
You then both sat in silence for a short while, tapping the edge of the glass in your hand as you scanned the rest of his charming home. The silence wasn’t awkward considering the past events of today, just a silence in its definition.
“I still can’t believe I ran into you at a coffee shop.” Taehyung suddenly remarked, looking off at his table in front with a smile tugging his lips.
You chuckled. “Why? Too meet-cute for you?”
“No.” He chuckled too. “It’s just, I really thought it was the end when you left after graduation.” Taehyung paused for a poignant moment, air heavy with something as you watched him muster the courage to say something else.
“I thought I’d never see you again.”
He claimed it with such a sense of sadness, sense of longing that reminded you of how upset you also were that day, the rampant emotions that came crashing down realizing you were leaving behind an entire life.
“Me too.” You added with a similarly downcast tone. “I thought I’d never see you again, either.”
Taehyung then looked at you, eyes meeting your gaze. “I’m glad that wasn’t true.” Something lingered behind his words, something incredibly thick and telling, though you deflected it with a joke to lighten the air.
“I’m glad you didn’t delete my PowerPoints, either.” You snickered, hand coming up to cover your mouth, “I used to put a lot of work into them.”
Taehyung scoffed playfully, smiling through a chuckle as he responded. “I didn’t have the heart to. You were so passionate about your hatred for fruit on pizza.”
“I still am.” You added. “Do you really have them?”
“Yeah, I do. Let me show you.” Taehyung then pulled out his phone from his pocket, clicking away on the device as he scooted closer to you and leaned in, you similarly doing so and peering at a Google Drive folder of your wonderfully crafted presentations.
“Oh my God, I thought you were joking.” You snorted, snickering at the hilarious folder name; ‘Y/N says Fuck Hawaiian Pizza: the Saga’
“Nope, couldn’t delete them even if I was dared to.” Taehyung laughed with you, both of your eyes naturally falling as he shut off his phone, the conversation shifting.
“You know, I never actually hated it that much.” You admitted sheepishly. “I just liked annoying you and wasting 5 minutes of your day with every presentation.”
Taehyung looked scandalized at first, mouth falling agape until he ultimately let it go, admitting something of his own. “You know, I never actually needed your history notes. I just liked being annoying about stealing them so you always had to chase me down.” Taehyung’s smile was suddenly impish, shy as he fixated on fiddling with his slender fingers.
“After all that running I always did after you too? Jheez, you’re the reason I have strong calves now.”
“And you’re the reason I’m really good at presentations now.” You both chuckled together, the old days coming back in bouts until your mood changed, remembering Jimin’s advice from earlier.
As you looked at Taehyung, while he didn’t look at you, you could only help but find every reason in the world to listen to Jimin. Because Taehyung was Taehyung, he was the Taehyung that stole your heart with his boxy grin, the Taehyung who made every other man seem like an unappealing idiot you wanted nothing to do with, the same Taehyung who’s heart was made of love, and you wanted nothing but to return to him the love he gifted the world.
Because you loved Taehyung, no matter how much you’ll try to deny it, you still love him. All his smiles and giggles and soft hair and his sometimes coltish, though endearing ways of being himself. All his hard expressions and intimidating eyes and handsome looks and the way he holds a universe of stars in his old soul.
So your next words flowed, flowed more fluently than anything ever has in your life.
“You know,” You paused, eyes faltering to the glass in your hand. “I think, for the majority of high school... I had a crush on you, but I never said anything because I thought you wouldn’t want me.”
And there came the silence, the piercing, God awful silence you were so afraid of and so sure was spelling your doom. You didn’t dare look up from your glass now, downright terrified he was probably pulling the most confused face ever, and his silence was deafening. It had you contemplating the best way to jump out his window, he was only, what, 14 stories up? A human can survive a fall that high, right?
“You wanna know something?” Taehyung suddenly broke the silence, his deep, dulcet voice sounding beautifully in his apartment, and your eyes widened the second he opened his mouth next.
“I think I was in love with you for the majority of high school, but I didn’t say anything because I thought you never felt the same way.” And that’s when everything clicked, when your eyes widened in revelation, when it suddenly felt like the 6 years you spent battling your feelings for him was nothing but a sad joke.
Because this moment, alone, made you realize you two had the same hearts all along.
“You wanna know something?” You swallowed hard, eyes still on your glass as it shifted in your hand mindlessly. “I think... I’m still in love with you.”
You couldn’t see Taehyung, because you didn’t dare look at him at a time like this. You just sat there, breathing as leveled as you could until you felt Taehyung shift on the couch. He’d moved closer, closing the small gap between you both, beckoning you to finally look at him and that’s exactly what you did.
He spoke low, deep and low and it had your toes curling at just how proximal he was, his beautiful eyes gazing at you like you meant the universe and more to him.
And little did you know, you really did.
“I think..” He started, gripping the glass of water from your hands and placing it onto his coffee table. “I’m still in love with you, too.”
And your heart was set ablaze in a matter of seconds, your tentative eyes finding Taehyung’s as he leaned in, large palms on either side of your body as he inched closer, closer, and closer, until all he could see were your lips, jutting his face forward until his lips just brushed yours.
You chased his mouth a little, fluttering your eyes shut and Taehyung couldn’t help but smile before finally, finally pressing his lips to yours.
His mouth kissed you slow at first, slow and steady and it was intoxicating just like this. He constantly chased your lips, mouthing at them sensually and it was driving you insane, just the taste of his lips with a hint of wine on his breath shooting electricity to your core.
His hands moved to your sides, wrapping around your rib cage as he leaned you back onto the couch and laid on top of you. His body covered you as far as you could see, your dainty hands coming up to find his jawline and pull him against your lips fervently.
He slowly grew more passionate, smoothing over your sides as he mouthed for more of you, swallowing the little moans you made that vibrated through his body and it only revved is engine more.
Taehyung was taken, completely taken by how much he wanted you that he could only see you, could only think about all the dirty but soft and tender and passionate things he wanted to do to you.
One of his hands travelled underneath your thigh, pulling your leg up against him as he pressed his hips into your core, his hardening cock prodding you through his clothes once he started a gentle rocking motion.
Your hands travelled up his beautiful neck and tangled into his hair as you reciprocated. A slight tug left him groaning into your mouth, causing you to buck up into him harshly and it sent Taehyung’s mind into a dangerous place.
His breathing elevated against you, gripping your ribs so urgently it only made you pull him closer, arch your chest into his just so you could relish in the feeling. Your heart was thrumming in your chest, veins coursing with adrenaline so white hot it wasn’t long before you were moving desperately with Taehyung and it fueled your horny nerves.
Taehyung suddenly disconnected his mouth from you, breathing so shallow his chest was rising and falling fast. He was only centimeters above as he looked down at you, his eyes boring into yours with such a prominent sense of longing, want, pure desire, it took him no time to speak.
“Do you know how long..” He took a breath. “I’ve wanted to do that?”
“Do you know how long I’ve wanted you to do that?” You replied, hands now smoothing over his shoulders to feel him, his body raging hot as he laid on top of you, looking at you like you were the only thing he ever wanted.
“Fuck, we’re so stupid.” Taehyung quickly said before his mouth crashed onto yours. This time there was something carnal in his kiss, something urgent and hot and it only made you pull him closer for more.
His tongue began to lick over your lips, slithering inside your mouth and the taste of him was euphoric, making you tangle your tongue with his just to taste him over and over again, until it was safe to say your tongues were down each other’s throats.
He kissed you sloppily, kissed until he was consuming you, his fingers digging into your thigh and side so fervently you knew there’d be marks, and it made your spine shiver, even more so when he spoke again.
“The minute.. I saw you in that dress..” He breathed out, kissing in between the exhaustion of his lungs. “I wanted to rip it off you.”
You groaned desperately at his confession, wanting Taehyung in ways that were so utterly carnal, almost feral, your entire being wanting to consume every inch of him, lay a million kisses across his honey-coloured skin and hear his caramel voice whisper into your ear, and so it didn’t take long for you to voice your desire.
“Taehyung..” You sighed, a satisfied lilt to your tone and it only lit Taehyung on fire.
“Mm?” He hummed, licking into your mouth on a quest for everything inside, his hips now grinding into your clothed cunt so harshly he was practically dry humping you, and without a second thought you were moving yourself against him too, hands exploring his broad chest.
“Taehyung..” You were more urgent, and it made Taehyung grunt harshly. “Rip it off me, Tae, unwrap me like you said you would.” You started harshly tugging at his offensive shirt, tracing the column of his throat as you relished in his delicious kisses.
And it all made Taehyung move so much harder, so much more roughly you were moaning into his mouth at the press of his hard, long cock against your aching core.
“Ruin me, Taehyung.” You scratched your nails against his neck, swallowing him into your mouth as you talked. “I want you to ruin me.”
“Fuck,” Taehyung swore, his length beginning to prod you so much more apparently as you bucked your hips up into him, it was sending Taehyung down the proverbial hole. And when you let out another gorgeous moan of his name, he knew he was a goner.
“Fuck, I can’t do this anymore.”
Taehyung then harshly grabbed your wrists and forced them against the couch in a single motion, eyes growing dark with heat radiating of his body in waves. He darted to the underside of your jaw and kissed hard, began mouthing at your skin until he travelled to the junction of your neck, sucking over the sensitive skin so rampantly it had you squirming underneath him, desperately trying to feel him against your core.
His pretty purple marks began blooming onto your neck, evidence of his raw desire for you, the years he spent longing for you. His teeth were nipping your skin, tongue licking over the bites as he pressed your wrists further into the couch the more you resisted.
You breath hitched when he moved to the slightly exposed valley of your breasts, making your nipples harden at just the prospect of his mouth travelling there. You began fighting his hold, causing you to arch into him as something dawned on you.
“Taehyung.. your shirt.” You whined, trying to manage the pleasure of his mouth canvasing your skin.
Taehyung left you for a mere second to shred off the annoying piece of clothing, tossing it aside as he returned to you urgently, your legs hooking around his torso as he came back to you.
His mouth was sucking hickeys onto your chest again when his hands began to smooth down your sides, so sensually purposeful until he reached underneath the hem of your dress, hooking onto the waistline of your pantyhose and panties, tugging teasingly.
Your core ignited at just his touch against bare skin, gushing as your hips harshly grinded against his body and your hands smoothed over the lean muscle of his body.
He yanked the pieces of clothing down the curve of your ass, proceeding to pull them past your thighs as you unhooked your legs to help take them off you.
The rush of the cold against your wet pussy lips made your breath hitch beautifully, one of Taehyung’s hands moving your skirt to let his large, warm palm cup your sex so pleasurably the contrast of the size of his hand and your little cunt sent you both ablaze.
“You’re so small, think you can take me, good girl?” Taehyung breathed against your chest. “I’ll fuck up your insides.” His baritone voice was dark and low as he warned you, sent arousal spiking through your nerves as you groaned.
“Fuck up my insides, Tae.” You desperately moaned out, hands finding Taehyung’s hair as he continued to lay searing kisses to your hot skin, his fingers rubbing your dripping folds harshly. “I just.. I need you, Taehyung, so fucking badly.”
“Say it again.” Taehyung hissed, exposing one of your bare breasts from your dress and pressing his tongue against a perched nipple, the wet sensation so satisfying you were scratching his shoulder blades.
“I-I need you, Taehyung.”
“Need me where?” He growled as he pressed against your clit and circled it, collecting your slick and spreading it all over yourself.
And it was hard, so fucking hard to think straight with your bare, soaking wet pussy was rubbing against Taehyung’s rough fingers and his lips sucking your exposed nipple for dear life, the pleasure burning inside you so hot your voice was coming out in choked moans.
“Need you inside, Taehyung.” You gasped out. “So empty without you, so fucking empty, for so long.”
“God, fuck.” Taehyung groaned proudly, popping off your breast to look at your half-lidded eyes, his own blown out with his hair mussed and lips swollen pink. He returned to your lips again as his hands simultaneously hooked underneath your thighs and suddenly lifted you off the couch, your legs secured around his torso as he walked you into what you assumed was his bedroom.
Your core rubbed against the buckle of Taehyung’s belt as he walked and you gushed oceans, the cool metal providing such delicious friction you were moaning satisfyingly into Taehyung’s mouth, grinding against him for more.
His kiss was fervent even when he splayed you onto his covers, back hitting the bed as you stroked your hands over his beautiful bare chest.
Taehyung suddenly came off you, eyes going wild as he looked down at your panting figure underneath him, then your offensive dress.
“Fuck this thing.” Taehyung nearly ripped it from your body, shredding the pretty fabric off and simply basked in the glory of seeing your naked body for the very first time.
Taehyung’s eyes filled with pure wonder, the moonlight and reflection of white snow falling outside adding a glow to your skin he couldn’t help but marvel at, your curves so beautiful he wanted to run his hands all over, the purple of his marks left on you only making him blossom with more arousal, more passion.
“Holy shit, you’re the prettiest thing I’ve ever seen.” Taehyung’s face was so blown away, you couldn’t help but grow a little shy, bringing him close to you by his neck so you could breathe into his ear.
“Good, I hear you ruin them.”
Taehyung could only smirk, rolling his tongue on the inside of his cheek, cock twitching at just your words. “You’re gonna be the death of me.”
Taehyung trailed one hand down your body, momentarily wrapping it around your throat until it was gliding over your nipple and down to your core, lining the lips of your pussy so teasingly you were reeling.
The pads of his fingers smoothed over your pussy lips again, applying pressure to your clit that had you lurching, until he used the opportunity to slide two fingers into your aching hole with ease.
“You’re so fucking wet, dripping all over my fingers.” He growled into your ear as he laid himself on top of you, his free hand holding your face while the other worked your core.
The sharpness of his long, slender fingers were euphoric, causing you to moan loudly. You could see his hard dick pressing against the fabric of his slacks almost painfully, and you jutted your hand out to begin palming him generously.
Taehyung could finally hiss as loud as he wanted, screwing his eyes shut in sheer pleasure.
He began pumping you faster in response, sliding in and out so deliciously you were moaning incessantly against his mouth as he began kissing you again. Your breasts were pressing into Taehyung’s bare chest the more you arched yourself, closing the offensive gap between you both and the skin to skin contact sending you both to cloud nine.
“Taehyung..” You moaned in between kisses, so shameless about your desire for him you only wanted to know his name.
“Taehyung.”
“Fucking hell, that does shit to me.” Taehyung began thrusting harshly into your hole now as punishment, practically finger-fucking you against his bed till it made your walls clamp down on him, trap his slender fingers inside so you could feel every heavenly inch of them.
You became hungry for more, your hand grabbing at Taehyung’s straining cock harder and the strangled groan that left his lips was so fucking beautiful, your insides were screaming.
“Shit, Taehyung,” You moaned out breathlessly. “You’re so hot like this, so fucking hot. Fuck me, fuck me like you said you would. ”
Taehyung’s breaths turned heavy and hungry, his cock aching to be inside you so painfully he was going insane at your every word.
“Fuck. I’m fucking you into next week. I’m fucking you until you only know my name. Fucking you until you know how badly I’ve wanted you, until your legs are shaking and you feel me in your throat.”
“Then do it.” You nearly cried out, hands fumbling with the waistband of Taehyung’s pants. Your pussy was aching so excruciatingly around Taehyung’s fingers your slick was gushing from you, all over him and it only made Taehyung feral thinking about what would happen if it were his dick instead.
“Fucking do it, Taehyung, fuck me until I’m shaking.”
Taehyung flipped his switch and suddenly shoved his fingers so deep inside you, scissoring you completely open it made you lurch up in searing pleasure. His large palm grabbed underneath your head and positioned you upwards, able to angle his fingers so he could smash them inside you so harshly it was pathetic it wasn’t even his dick that had you high, but just his fingers.
“Holy fuck, Taehyung!”
“Cum all over my fingers, pretty. I wanna hear you.” Taehyung growled into your ear, couldn’t help but think about your walls convulsing around his dick and it was euphoric hearing you moan, all fucked out underneath him.
He couldn’t stop finger-fucking you like his life depended on it, wanted to fill you up in so many ways you’d remember him for weeks.
You were almost there, the edge so close. It was racking the bottom of your stomach, had your toes curling and walls pounding so snug around Taehyung’s fingers you could only latch onto the nape of his neck for dear life.
You felt it, felt it so near and had his name leaving your mouth in such an intoxicating mantra you were seconds from letting go. Seconds, milliseconds, just about to release your impending orgasm until Taehyung ripped his fingers out of you.
You gasped scandalously at the loss, body buzzing with your unachieved high it made your exclaim come out in a garbled protest. “Taehyung, what the fuck?!”
You tried getting an answer, but Taehyung’s hungry, half-lidded eyes shut you up immediately, watching him lick his fingers like he was starved, like this was the sweetest honey he’s ever tasted.
“Fuck, you taste as sweet as you look.” Taehyung’s grin was evil, and it made you turned on but pissed he denied your orgasms.
“You’re so-” You attempted to get out, but Taehyung suddenly flipped you onto all fours in a second, your hands and knees anchored onto the bed with only your shocked figure confused.
“T-Taehyung, what are you-” You then sighed at the sudden touch of his tongue meeting your weeping hole in a devilish swipe. It was intoxicating, feeling his wet muscle begin licking into your core and tasting your soaked folds from behind.
“I’m doing what you asked..” His voice was dark and weighty, and that’s when you suddenly felt another sensation of his two fingers returning to your throbbing entrance. Your insides buzzed when he spoke against your core, grittier than he ever has all night. “I’m going to fucking ruin you.”
And his tongue suddenly slithered into your hole when he removed his fingers, licking into your entrance in a harsh rhythm as his palms began grabbing at your ass, kneading the meaty flesh as he straight up devoured your pussy like it was the only thing he’s wanted his entire life.
His tongue was lapping you fervently, so starved your dissipated orgasm was coming back again. You were winded, having never been eaten out like this and you were moaning his name loud enough to get noise complaints filed to the police.
“Taehyung!” You cried out, though he didn’t let up. Instead he brought one of his hands to your pulsing clit, circling and applying so much necessary pressure you were losing your mind, insane off the fact he hadn’t even filled you up with his cock yet and you were pathetic underneath him.
“Fucking God, Taehyung, Tae!” And when he groaned so audibly into your pussy, rutting himself against the bed for friction it sent you flying, soaring into the sky and losing all coherent thought as your orgasm bubbled in your stomach, his husky voice grounding you to Earth.
“Cum for me, baby, now.” And that was all it took to have you lurching over the edge, releasing your pent up orgasm so violently you were nearly screaming, Taehyung’s name the only distinguishable thing rolling off your tongue.
He licked up your juices like they were fresh water, helping you ride out your euphoric orgasm and allowing yourself a moment to rest. You breathed, falling onto the bed in exhaustion, trying to quell the blood pumping in your ears when Taehyung suddenly pulled you back onto your hands and knees, cautioning you darkly when he spoke.
“You thought we were done?” It was evil, he was evil, the way his voice sounded like the epitome of a smirk as you tried catching your breath. Taehyung’s lips then suddenly ghosted the shell of your ear as he wrapped an arm around your torso, pressing his chest to your back as he spoke.
“I haven’t even done anything yet.”
And again, it was the ‘yet’ that had you groaning out in frustration but in the best possible ways. How wasn’t this already enough? How did he have you so fucked out just by the sheer power of his fingers and tongue? It was sickening, he was sickening and you found yourself throwing your ass back on him to urge his cock into you already, to just fuck you open with all he had.
“Taehyung, just-fuck! Fuck me, please.” You were pleading, needing to feel the wreckage of what you could tell was the biggest cock you’ll ever take.
Taehyung had removed his pants and boxers in the moment, freeing his painfully angry cock from it’s confines. You were faltering from your position again when Taehyung suddenly prodded your abused hole with his engorged tip, you shuddering to life harshly.
“Taehyung, just-”
“Beg me.”
You cried out in immediate desperation, his voice so authoritative it was sending you into submission, clutching the covers under you so hard your knuckles were white as you complied. “Taehyung, please, fuck me. I need you, please.”
Taehyung’s arm was snug around your torso, feeling your every quaking expire in his hold and it was turning him on so agonizingly this was painful even for himself, but the way your sweet voice begged him was absolutely exhilarating.
“More.”
“Taehyung, if you don’t fucking-!” You were cut off by the sharp impalement of Taehyung’s cock in a single breath, knocking all forms of wind out of you. The head alone was so large you went hurtling into the mattress, almost losing your shaking arms’ support until Taehyung pulled you back up for him, snaking his one hand that was previously around his cock to your breast while the other gripped at your hip.
He was slowly sinking in, feeling your walls flutter open for him and the satisfied moan that left his mouth was evidence of how much this was affecting him.
“Fuck...” Taehyung dragged out completely content, digging into your hip to watch you arch your back for him, on his knees as he filled you up from behind. “You’re so fucking tight and wet, holy shit.”
You were struggling for air, oxygen leaving your lungs trying to accommodate for his monstrous size. It was unfair, so unfair he was so big and it had you praising him immediately, so full and stuffed it was the most pleasurable thing you’ve experienced all your life.
“You’re so big, oh my God, Taehyung, so big.” One of your hands shot towards his holding you by your hip, interlacing your fingers together against your skin just to ground yourself, to manage the sharp pierce of his length until it simmered into a pleasurable burn.
He bottomed out into your cervix and you both grunted loud, Taehyung containing himself just so he could feel your velvet walls palpitate around his throbbing dick. “Do you feel how hard I am, Y/N? Do you fucking feel it?”
“Yes, God fuck! Tae, yes..” You sighed out, eyes watering at just how much pleasure was already raking your abdomen again.
“That’s what you do to me, you barely touched me and this is how hard I am. How fucking badly I want you, how much I’ve always wanted you, wanted you since day one.” Taehyung’s voice was sincere and desperate, seemingly trying to counter your confession of your feelings from earlier.
“Show me, Taehyung.” You moaned, hands gripping his more affectionately, more desperately as you weakly held yourself up by the other. “Fuck me and show me how much you want me.”
Taehyung grunted out harshly, pulling his cock out of you until he thrusted back in. The first thrust had you keening, sending you into the mattress only to have Taehyung pull you back up once again. Then the second came, your walls greedily soaking him into you and it felt perfect, like two puzzle pieces meant to connect with each other.
Then came the third, the fourth, the fifth, all the way until Taehyung was pounding into you from behind with a drag so delicious you were moaning out more than you ever have in your entire life.
And it was sickening, utterly sickening the way his dick began fucking you into the mattress so roughly, angling your body in ways for his cock to pump into all the right places with the right amount of pressure. He watched himself disappear into your little cunt repeatedly, holding your hip up to encourage you to arch so low your ass was snug against his pelvis, and couldn’t think of anything more fucking perfect.
“You take me so well, so fucking well.” Taehyung praised, leaning over to aimlessly lay wet kisses up your spine like the demon he was, shoving himself into you over and over and over again with your walls convulsing around him.
You were trapping him inside you so tight he could spill into you in seconds, though held back determined he was making you cum again.
“So full, Taehyung, so deep.. all I feel is you.” The statement left you with a desperate sigh, your head hanging low until Taehyung’s hand kneading your breast suddenly wrapped around your throat, causing you to gasp at the arousing feeling. He pulled your head upwards, the junction between his long index finger and thumb forcing you to look forward, and you were utterly breathless at the scene.
His lips were near your ear in seconds, speaking like the devil incarnate as he was bent over you. “Look at us, look at yourself, so fucking pretty, so perfect.” You could suddenly see the reflection of Taehyung fucking into you from behind in his window, not even knowing tears had streamed down your face as his hand beautifully encased your throat, causing every nerve in your body to alight with fire.
“Look at the way I fuck you, how much I love you.” Taehyung’s carnal eyes looked at you through the reflection of the window, heart twinging at the sight of you crying but knowing he’s making you feel good, continuing his onslaught of drilling your battered pussy.
You moaned at the erotic scene, using every ounce of strength to keep yourself upright, your walls pulsing around Taehyung’s length as he thrusted harder and harder.
“Tae, fuck! I’ve always loved you, I always felt the same way, and I still do-ah!” Your lungs were tapping out when he suddenly shoved himself inside you to the brim, so utterly deep before he was thrusting again harshly, strangling out moans.
Clear sweat was slick between your bodies, his huge, delicious cock incessantly tearing up your insides and all you could do was chant his name in pleasure, in bliss, in your love for him that was burning so bright it was nearly painful.
“Y/N.. fuck. You’re ruining me. You’re so perfect, we’re so fucking perfect.” Taehyung was rambling at this point as his speed reflected his desperation, his immeasurable feelings for you.
He was trying his damn hardest to distract himself from the release aching his balls. He was growing weak himself, feeling you reciprocate his rough thrusts by fucking him back the same way. And the image in the window? Had him reeling, needing to hear the most beautiful sound you’d make when you finally came, and he knew you would, bordering the precipice with the way your walls pulsed around him.
Watching Taehyung fuck you in the window was now downright sinful to you, his harsh thrusts completely blissful and his hand gently squeezing at your throat was so dominant, so hot you were at your limit and ready to come.
But what ended up sending you over, pushing you to release the tightening knot in your stomach was the sweet, tender way Taehyung began kissing your neck.
The contrast between his cock abusing you and his plush lips kissing you so gently, so lovingly, it wasn’t long before you realized his fucking wasn’t just hard or rough, but full of sheer want, desire, love in all the right ways your walls were clenching around him rapidly in seconds.
And when Taehyung angled himself somehow deeper, in that one, perfect spot, you clamped down and finally came so hard you saw stars, knew you’d completely drenched his cock with the loudest release of his name you were glad it was the only word you knew in this moment.
“That’s it, baby. Just like that.” Taehyung breathed out in exhaustion, began soothing your abdomen with one hand and the other letting your head finally hang, grip loosened from around your throat and you could finally allow air back into your lungs.
You were heaving when you spoke up, realizing something. “Inside me.. Taehyung.” You were dreary, utterly gone, but it still didn’t distract you from the blissful feeling of Taehyung’s cock deliciously stuffed and throbbing inside you, trying to coax his rightful release. “Cum inside me, Tae. Please, fill me up.”
Taehyung didn’t need to be told twice when his cock worked a few more rough strokes into your tightened pussy and finally, finally came inside you. It was laced with a satisfied groan of your name, his grip on your side so intense you’d be glad if he left marks, wanting to remember every last bit of this night with Taehyung.
He painted you completely white inside, spilling everything he could offer into you, using what little strength he had left to hold you up while he continued to empty his seed inside. Taehyung then lost all function and allowed you to fall, his broad body resting on top of yours as you both hit the mattress.
Your chests rose and fell shallowly, completely taxed and having lost every ounce of strength. Taehyung’s hot breaths for air were fanning your neck, your arms sprawled out before you as Taehyung’s hands mindlessly interlaced with them against the tousled covers, cock still stuffing you whole.
It was another moment of breathing and regaining oxygen when Taehyung suddenly kissed the side of your neck, giving your hands a small squeeze before you felt him lifting himself, his warmth disappearing and you panicked.
“Where are you going?” Your throat was hoarse from screaming and moaning, a tinge of sadness to your tone as though he was leaving you, and Taehyung couldn’t help but find it endearing.
“It’s okay, I’ll be right back.” He smiled, moving your hair from the side of your face to plant a kiss to your cheek, post-sex haze racking his brain though allowing reality to leak back into his mind.
He then carefully, slowly pulled himself out of you, you whining at the loss of him and Taehyung smiled to himself in contentment, smoothing over your lower back with a palm in gratitude, before stepping towards his bathroom.
He’d pulled his boxers back on and returned with a damp cloth, finding you still flipped and laying on your stomach, having dozed off in exhaustion until you felt Taehyung’s warmth and heard his dulcet voice hazing you awake.
“Y/N, turn over for me.” His voice was hushed and tender, you complying by turning onto your back with his help. He then carefully swept the cloth against your battered core, you wincing a little with sensitivity and Taehyung made sure to clean more gently.
The cloth was thrown back into his bathroom when he turned back to you, an arm thrown over your tear-stained face and the other clutching your body, clearly shivering in the cold now.
Taehyung easily scooped you into his arms and lifted you off the bed, carrying you over to his pillows and delicately placing you upon his duvet, pulling the covers out from underneath you and tucking you into his bed.
You curled up into his blanket, Taehyung searching through his drawers for a stray t-shirt you could wear. He then lifted you into a sitting position, your eyes evidently sleepy and body limp as he pulled the shirt onto you, letting you fall back in place.
Taehyung could only chuckle to himself thinking he did mean to ruin you, but not so harshly you were devoid of consciousness. He placed a little kiss to your forehead in apology, wiping some of the tears off your face before he rounded the bed, crawling in next to you.
His arms reached out to pull your back snug against his chest, feeling the sleep in the back of his eyes take him. He basked in the strawberry scent of your hair, completely gratified until you suddenly turned over towards him.
His eyes shot open, only the top of your head coming into view as you nuzzled into his warm chest, your small self all tucked into Taehyung as he wrapped his arms around you like a safety net, holding you near.
And in that moment, all he could focus on was your light breathing, the sweet sound of your voice as you suddenly spoke in the dark of the night, moonlight glowing upon your entangled bodies.
“I love you, Taehyung.”
He grinned, the kind where he felt relieved, fulfilled, in a state of sheer bliss it was a moment before he replied, his own voice calm as you felt the hum through his chest, his hand tangled in your hair.
“I love you, Y/N.”
The morning sun bled into Taehyung’s room, your eyes fluttering open at a time you had no concept of. You stirred, finding yourself still in Taehyung’s arm, in relatively the same position from last night. You didn’t even feel like moving from his hold, the feeling so utterly fuzzy and comforting.
You basked in the sensation until he began to stir next to you, pretty eyelashes batting as his eyes fluttered open. His sights fell to you, eyes adorably taken by sleep while his soft hair was endearingly mussed by his pillow. You smiled at him warmly as he grinned back.
“Good morning.” you said shyly, nearly hiding underneath his covers.
“Good morning.”
You then flopped onto your back peering up at the ceiling, last night coming back to you in dream-like flashes you were surprised was somehow your reality.
It was just miraculous, utterly unbelievable until Taehyung turning into your side and snuggling his face into your neck was evidence everything was real, that he was real. It wasn’t some remnant of a dream or hallucination, but the real Taehyung as his arm draped over your stomach.
You had to bite your lip to contain your happiness, utter exuberance the universe had somehow finally paired you and him together, and funnily enough, on Christmas of all days.
“What are you thinking about, princess?” Taehyung hummed into your collarbone inquisitively, half asleep as he cuddled you.
You smiled, basking in his comfort. “Merry Christmas, Taehyung.”
Taehyung chuckled against you, arm pulling you closer to him as he kissed your neck. “Merry Christmas, Y/N.”
“Can you believe we met each other again during Christmas? It’s like the perfect Christmas miracle.” You marveled in wonder, tracing your finger along Taehyung’s pretty hand on your stomach.
“I mean, you know what Andy Williams said..” He mused next to you, husky voice laden with sleep. “It’s the most wonderful time of the year.”
#underthemistletoe#kscwinter2020#ksmutclub#thebtswritersclub#bangtanhq#kwritersworldnet#thetruthuntoldnet#taehyung x reader#kim taehyung x reader#taehyung smut#taehyung fluff#bts smut#bts fluff#taehyung scenario#taehyung oneshot#taehyung fanfiction#kim taehyung
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Loving you
Andy Barber x Gender neutral (?) reader
-> the one where you’re tired of andy’s igorance towards himself
Note: Angst diffusing into fluff, the typical andy-kitchen scene i used in my candlelight loving fic— except there’s no smut, ++ feedbacks welcomed as always! and reblogs and likes are more than appreciated <33
𝐡𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐲'𝐬 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭
~h
-
“Andy, baby. Will you please take a break?” You exasperatedly sigh when you see Andy still hovering over his desk in his study after the fifth time you told him to take some time to rest.
“I know, I know. Just a little more, honey. I’ll join you in bed in a bit, okay?” He only looked up at you for barely a second to reply before his eyes were back on the stacks of case studies and folders on his desk.
Truth be told, you were completely done with his bullshit.
You huff in frustration, rolling your eyes the slightest bit and muttering to yourself as you distanced yourself from Andy’s home office with full annoyance. “Fucking lawyers.”
Andy’s been fully hung up on work ever since one of his co-workers took a vacation off work just last week. Meaning that his already-extensive workload just got an upgrade. Also meaning that he’d drag his workload home and continue working his ass off in his study. Which really- there’s nothing wrong with your boyfriend being all diligent and assiduous.
But it really doesn’t seem all that glorifying when you’re the one having to deal with all his crap. You could’ve probably list down all the times he put fucking paperwork above you, and the list would probably have been as long as Article 1.
Unbeknownst to you, Andy caught onto what you said right before you left his study. He felt guilty, alright. All he’s done is to be a complete work-addict while you’re out there being the best lover one can ever ask for. And all he wants to do is to chase after you and apologize and stay in bed and order in pizza with you. But the never ending workload on his desk was the one thing keeping him away from having you all snug in his chest.
He shakes his head, eyes glancing back down at his work. He was beyond exhausted, the pot of coffee you made him and the hope that the earlier he wraps his work up, the earlier he can shower you with all the love you deserved, was his only motivation to keep reading though the files and trying to get as much work done.
-
You groggily rubbed your eyes as you tried to feel around the sheets for Andy. And honestly? You weren’t even surprised that he wasn’t there. It was 7 in the morning, and it was too early for Andy to be up if he actually went to sleep last night. You could only assume that he never even went to bed, no matter how much you wished otherwise.
You head out to his study, the door’s still opened as it was yesterday and the faint noise of keyboard clicking tells you that Andy’s still working inside.
“Babe?” You knocked on the wooden door, trying to get his attention.
Andy’s hunched in his seat, eyes switching between his laptop and the files from time to time as he typed. He glances up at you, just a little surprised.
“Did you get some sleep, honey?” You asked, even though you knew you’d only receive the answer you dreaded so much.
He glances at the digital clock on the wall, only realising that it’s been 6 hours since you last came in to check on him. He scratches the back of his neck as he shook his head and mentally cursed himself. “I—”
He considered lying, but he already felt as bad for leaving you to sleep alone the whole night and breaking his promise on joining you in bed. And knowing you, you’d probably see right through his lies anyway.
You sigh, shaking your head and disappointedly rubbing your face. “I swear to god, Andrew—” You turned away before you could allow yourself to get even more pissed at him. Which most probably would’ve been impossible.
Caffeine. God— caffeine sounds fucking amazing right now.
-
Andy’s beyond guilty. So much more than what he felt yesterday. And his heart burns when he sees you so disappointed and pissed at him. The kind of pain where it feels like it’s being crushed and squashed.
He didn’t even realise that he went a whole night of work without sleep. Nor did he realise the time. Or that he forgot to keep his promise to join you in bed. Or the fact that he never paid attention to you for more than 5 minutes in the last 10 hours. Or that he didn’t join you for dinner. Or— okay, the list is long alright. And Andy knows he’s hurt you- the one person who’s patient enough to deal with him and the one person he loves above anything else in the goddamn world.
He ditched his laptop and stood up. Stretching his legs and working out the kinks in his muscles.
Andy trailed behind your footsteps, leaving his study for the first time in almost a day. It really took you to be angry at him just to get him out of the study. Andy knows his sorry isn’t enough. And you truly deserved every right to be pissed at him.
You were sorting your morning tea out when he came into the kitchen. Andy couldn’t help but smile fondly at you- or rather, your back really. For goodness sake, Andy’s head over heels in love with you. With every inch of you from head to toe. It is truly indescribable.
He steps up behind you, arms wrapping around your shoulders, and his chin resting on the tiny area joining your shoulder and your neck.
“Hi, baby,” He pressed a soft kiss on where his chin was before.
He wasn’t surprised that you stayed silent and continued doing your own thing. He knows damn well he deserves the silent treatment, alright.
“Honey,” He trails off as his thumbs rubbed circles on both sides of your shoulder. “Talk to me please, baby.”
You let out a heavy sigh, unwilling to turn and look at him, but you knew stirring tea wasn’t enough to occupy the next 3 minutes of your life, let alone the next few hours.
Andy turns you around by your shoulders, one hand shifting your mug to the side so he doesn’t accidentally mess up more and end up spilling hot tea all over you. He picks you up by your sides and sets you down softly on the counter.
His head was around your chest level now. As much as Andy wanted to bury his head in your chest and stay there forever, he knows he has to say something because you definitely won’t say it first. He takes your hands in his, bringing it up to his lips and kissing your knuckles, his pretty blue eyes staring up at you the whole time.
One look and you know he’s sorry. His watery eyes bring you to that conclusion.
“I’m sorry, honey.” He sighs, guiltily holding your palm up to the side of his face. “I know I hurt you. I was just so focused on the case that I didn’t even realise I hurt you, baby. You deserve all the right to be mad at me and ignore me and- fuck. I really messed up, Y/n.”
Andy shakes his head, “I just thought that if I wrapped up all my work, I’d have more time with you.” He chuckles humourlessly. “I know what I did was wrong, baby. You gave me more than enough chances yesterday but I messed up every one and I left you.”
He glances into your eyes desperately, his hand gripping onto your palm on his cheek tightly. You know it’s a silent plea for you to respond and do that thing he loves about your touch.
You find yourself surrendering to his silent plea, and your thumb brushed the side of his face. Soft and repeatedly. The comfort it brought Andy was beyond words. He leaned into your palm, seeking more of your touch.
“You’ve been nothing but understanding and caring and I just kept on taking advantage of that.” Andy was grateful he had someone as amazing as you. “ I’m so sorry I hurt you, honey. I know I j- just completely left you alone— and shit, you don’t deserve that, my love.” The crack in his voice broke your resolve.
You breathed deeply, bringing your other palm up to the other side of his face. “Baby, you really don’t get it, do you?” You paused, searching his eyes before realising that Andy didn’t truly understand why you were upset in the first place. “Andy, everytime I came up to check on you— that was for you. I wanted you to get some rest, honey. You looked exhausted every single time I came in, and I hated that you just ignored your own health.”
“You skipped dinner, bub.” Your hands shifts down to the back of his neck, pulling him in closer. “All this overworking and sleepless nights— I just wish you’d take care of yourself more, Andy.”
Andy sighs, hands shifting down to your hips and he leans in, burying his head in the middle of your chest.
You felt his lips moving against your his shirt as he murmured. “I know, ‘m sorry.” Andy inhaled deeply, your natural, comforting scent piercing through his nose. “I missed you, bubba,”
You run a hand through his hair. “I missed you too, love.” You lean down and kissed the top of his head. “You wanna go wash up or get some rest while I heat up yesterday’s dinner?”
“Wanna stay just like this.” He mumbled into the fabric of your his shirt.
You laughed heartily, “Go nap on the couch, Barbie.” He pulls away from your chest. “Or at least, please go brush your teeth. I’ll fix up somethin’ for you.”
“And sleep with me after?” He arched a brow, and you took the time to scan over Andy’s face. He looks so fucking exhausted. The dark circles under his eyes and the barely noticeable strands of gray hair among the luscious black is a simple message that he was stressed. And god, you wanted nothing more than to take care of him and make sure he’s all healthy and— lord.
“Anything you want, baby. As long as you don’t step foot in the study till tomorrow afternoon.” You pressed your forehead against his, lips touching into an easy kiss.
You were both exhausted— Andy with his lack of sleep and you having to worry over him almost every 45 minutes. You both needed the rest. And some time together where it’s just the two of you and no one else exists.
#chris evans#chris evans x reader#cevans#cevans x reader#steve rogers#steve rogers angst#steve rogers smut#andy barber#andy barber angst#andy barber fluff#andy barber x reader#andy barber x male reader#chris evans x male reader#gay andy barber
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“the president and the troublemaker” (part 8) (chilumi fic)
“Lumine is the student council president and Childe is the school’s number one troublemaker. They cross paths more than they’d like. Especially when Childe finds out Lumine’s big secret. Highschool AU à la Kaichou wa Maid-sama.”
[part 1] [part 2] [part 3] [part 4] [part 5] [part 6] [part 7]
existence is a prison :’)
[Fic Masterlist] // [AO3 Link] // [Main AO3]
the president and the troublemaker (part 8)
Cross jab with your right arm.
Lumine lunged towards her opponent with her right arm.
Throwaway jab with your left.
As her opponent blocked her right arm, Lumine quickly threw her left arm out, forcing them to blink and react to the oncoming hit.
Follow the momentum.
Planting her left foot on the ground, she let the force of the punch swing her body around, then slammed her right foot into her opponent’s head.
And there you have a successful spinning heel kick.
Lumine let the air relax out of her body as the man crumpled to the floor, and the bells rang. The crowd around swelled into cheers as the referee held her hand up, signaling her victory. Her amber eyes roamed around the arena, noting all the audience reactions: the nods of approval, the tilting heads of curiosity, the quick Internet searches on phones—who is this girl?
She was starting to gain attention here in Snezhnaya, as her win rate at the moment was at an astounding 100% thus far. She had quickly gained the nickname “Abyss Princess” due to Kaeya’s “innocent” portrayal of her in his promotions, juxtaposed with her destructive lethality in the ring.
“You learn quick,” Childe said as Lumine walked into the locker room. “I only taught you that move once,” he added. “And yet you executed it perfectly.”
“That’s Lumine for you,” Aether said, handing her a towel and a water bottle. “Great job, as always, sis.” She nodded as she gratefully chugged the water down (purposefully ignoring Childe.)
Kaeya sauntered into the room shortly after, clapping slowly while a grin pulled at his lips. “I come bearing good news.”
“Free dinner?” Lumine guessed.
Aether nodded. “Seconded.”
“Even better.” Kaeya held up an official looking document. “Our little Lumine just got her first sponsor.”
Lumine almost dropped her water bottle. “No way!” She ran up to the blue haired captain. “Who is it?!”
Her manager looked down at the slip of paper in his hands. “A wealthy traveling merchant named Ivanovich.”
Lumine turned towards Aether excitedly. “A sponsor!”
“A sponsor!” he echoed as the two shared a hug.
“What does this mean now?” Lumine asked Kaeya.
“It means we get to celebrate!” He gave her a closed eye smile. “How about a little vacation?”
* * *
Wow.
Lumine audibly gasped as she stood atop the hill overlooking the beach before her.
Being from a poor family, she and Aether never got to travel much; it was the first time either of them had been to the beach (or really vacationed for that matter) and it did not disappoint.
The glowing sun reflected brilliantly off the vivid blue waves, the water lapping at the fine, white sand with various stations of colorful towels and umbrellas set up throughout the shore. Lumine smiled as she saw families running along the sand, playing volleyball, and children joyfully splashing in the water.
“So this is the beach,” Aether said in wonderment beside her.
Lumine nodded as the two of them both breathed in deep, taking in the scent of salty waves and warm summer air. “It’s more beautiful than I could’ve ever imagined,” she whispered.
“Is this your first time at the beach?” Kaeya asked the two of them. After the twins nodded, he smiled, and continued, “Well, I hope you two truly enjoy yourselves then.”
“I can’t remember the last time we could just relax like this,” Aether said as the trio made their way towards the beach house they were renting for the weekend.
Since she could remember, her whole life (Aether’s too) had been jam-packed with work or school obligations; it would be nice to get away from everything, even if just for a few days.
She let out a yawn as she opened the door to the house. “Let the relaxation begin...” She froze in the doorway as her eyes landed on Childe laying on the couch. “...now.”
The orange-haired troublemaker opened his eyes slightly, then sat up and stretched. “Took you guys long enough. I’ve been waiting all morning.”
Lumine hadn’t moved an inch. “...Why is Childe here?”
“Well, I had to invite your coach, didn’t I?” Kaeya answered. “I hope that’s alright.”
“Is there a problem, Lumi?” Aether asked, concerned.
Ever since the rooftop incident, Lumine had found herself...restless around Childe. After she had gotten home from studying at his place, she thought about it—really thought about it—and neither of them had mentioned the fact that he had kissed her.
Had it been a figment of her imagination? Was he just messing with her?
Romance wasn’t something she knew. She could read textbook after textbook, fight opponent after opponent, but love? She was completely in the dark.
And it wasn’t something she could casually discuss with Aether or her friends. Her friends knew nothing about her and Childe, and she was sure Aether would murder Childe on the spot if he knew anything romantic was happening between the delinquent and his beloved twin sister. As far as he knew, Childe and Lumine got along well as coach and student, and were friends as a result of that.
Like at the hospital, she got flustered around Childe. She absolutely hated it, because she couldn’t figure out how or why—she couldn’t control it. And she especially hated it because Childe seemed to relish in the fact that she seemed so affected by him.
The simplest things he would do—the slightest glance in her direction, a brush of the hands—sent her heart into a frenzy.
Do..Do I love him back?
Her throat went dry at that prospect.
I don’t know.
She didn’t know.
So, she had hoped that the trip would bring her some clarity after time away from Childe, and hoped that upon her return, things would go back to normal.
But here he stood in front of her.
“Lumi, is everything okay?” Aether repeated.
Lumine cleared her throat. “Yup, everything is fine.” She rushed towards the stairs. “I’ll be in my room.” And with that, she disappeared into the closest bedroom she could find, slamming the door shut.
We’re just friends, she told herself. He is your friend, and your coach.
She clenched her fists. It was most obviously a joke, right? Why else would he have done it, and not mention it ever again?
Lumine let out a maddening laugh. Yes, that’s exactly it. It’s just another scheme of his to cause trouble for me.
She looked out her window, at the sparkling sea just lengths away. Well, she wasn’t going to be bothered by it, or him, any longer. Not when she was on vacation at least.
She rifled through her duffle bag, pulling out a bikini, and slipping it on. It was simple, black, only decorated with minimal frills, but it was quite revealing (especially compared to her normal attire). It definitely wouldn’t have been Lumine’s first choice of swimwear, but it was one of the cheapest swimsuits she could find on short notice.
She took a deep breath in, already imagining how relaxing the cool beach waves would feel on her skin. Excited, she yanked her door open quickly—
Only to find Childe standing there, his hand outstretched as if he were about to open the door himself.
Lumine’s face fell. “What do you want?”
“I was just coming to check on you,” he said with a smile. Then his eyes trailed down to her attire, and his face fell as well. “What are you doing?”
Lumine crossed her arms. “Obviously about to go swimming.”
“In that?” he asked lowly.
Feeling the heat crawl up her back, she shook her head. Not going to let him affect me. “Yup. Now, if you’ll excuse me.” She started to push past him.
He reached out and grabbed her wrist, stopping her.
“Childe, what are you—”
He pulled her towards him, and then wrapped his arms around her waist, pinning her back against his chest. She felt a sharp twinge on her shoulder.
...
He was biting her. He was biting her.
Lumine gasped, and struggled out of his hold. When she finally broke free, she whipped around, her hand rubbing her shoulder. Childe’s blue eyes glinted at her as he used the back of his hand to wipe at his lips.
“What the hell are you doing?!” Lumine hissed. Her thumb traced over the ridges left behind by his teeth.
“You know, if you wear that,” Childe said simply, eyeing her swimsuit, “everyone’s going to ask about that bite mark on your shoulder.” An innocent smile. “You don’t really want that, now do you?”
Her jaw fell open and she ran back into her room, checking her shoulder in the mirror. Sure enough, the area he had bitten down on was blemished red, and only grew more and more noticeable as the seconds ticked by.
She turned towards Childe, who was leaning on the doorframe, her eyes bewildered. “Why would you—”
Aether and Kaeya’s voices travelled up the staircase. There were people coming. And she had a kiss mark for all the world to see.
She quickly grabbed a t-shirt from the clothes she had just changed out of, and yanked it over her head as her brother and her manager walked by.
Aether stopped, looking at her curiously. His eyes flickered to Childe as well. “Are you guys going swimming?”
“Yes!” Lumine answered quickly, shuffling out the door. Hopefully, the faster she got away, the less chance there was for Aether to realize something had happened.
“...In your t-shirt?” Aether asked.
Lumine shrugged, doing her best to act nonchalant. “I got a little cold.” She started running down the stairs. “Catch you guys later!”
WIthout looking back, she ran until she had reached the shore of the beach, then let out a long sigh of relief at finally being alone.
What in the absolute hell is wrong with Childe?
Her fingers ghosted over the bite mark once again, a fire burning in her core. Why had he done that? Wasn’t that something only lovers did to each other?
Lovers…
!!!
Lumine swore her head exploded, and was sure the rising steam would be visible from miles away.
She stomped down the shoreline, heels digging into the shifty sands, desperately trying to distract her thoughts.
Miraculously, her thoughts drowned out as she approached a bustling crowd gathering before her. The noise was instantly familiar—the cheers, whoops, and gasps of an ongoing fight. Raising an eyebrow, she made her way through the people, until she was at the front line.
In the middle of the crowd, there was a large open space with three different circles—indicated by lines drawn in the sand—and within each circle were two people wrestling. Nearby each of the circles, a tall lifeguard chair stood, where a referee sat overlooking their respective match below.
Lumine turned to a stranger next to her, and asked what was going on.
“Oh, it’s the weekly beach wrestling competition!” they answered happily.
“A competition?” Lumine pondered for a second. An image of a free food voucher flashed in her mind. “...Are there any prizes?”
“Eh, most people just like to do it for fun,” the stranger said. “But if you win, you get all the earnings from entry fees!”
At the mention of money, Lumine instantly perked up. Not to mention tossing people around in the sand sounded like the perfect way to blow off some steam. “Where do you sign up?”
They looked at her curiously. “Right over there.” They gestured to a table set up underneath a makeshift awning. “But I should warn you: it’s usually an...all male competition, dear.”
Lumine was already waking away, stretching out her arms. Wrestling, huh? Not too different from what I do regularly, right?
As she passed the brawling rings, she took note of every competitor’s strengths, their statures—any information that would help her win in the near future. The stranger was right: there was no other female in sight, except as spectators.
And when Lumine walked over to sign up, there was a mix of reactions from those all around. Scrutiny, disbelief, doubt and arrogance—there’s no way she’s going to get far, right?
A smirk pulled at the corner of her lips.
Let’s prove them wrong.
* * *
Where did she go?
Childe squinted down the shore, eyes searching for that blonde head of hair. After Lumine had dashed out of the house, he decided to wait briefly before going after her. Of course he knew she was freaked out over what happened, but it had to be done.
One look at her attire, and his blood boiled over the thought of guys looking her up and down, innocence the furthest thing from their minds.
She was probably out there, kicking up a storm on the sandy shoreline, her head rattling with confusion at his actions. She was so endearingly naive about the intricacies of romance, as evidenced by her reaction to his confession of love, to which they had yet to discuss.
He wasn’t going to push it; he could always see the gears turning in her head when he showed any romantic interest towards her, and too much stimulation would probably overload her circuits. Not to mention the fact she would run away when confronting her feelings. But they would need to talk about it, eventually.
God, she was going to be the death of him.
He couldn’t quite put a finger on when he had realized he was actually in love with this short, tempered blonde, but when he did, it only made complete sense.
He wasn’t a stranger to romance. He knew he had the looks and the demeanor that just made girls gravitate to him, but he had never found interest in anyone. He just wanted to fight and train, train and fight—anything to get stronger and stronger.
But then that night.
Every so often, he would visit those illegal fighting rings, his interest only piqued for potential worthy opponents. Alberich’s ring was far out of the way, and he visited it rarely.
That night was the first time he had seen Outlander in the ring.
They had immediately grabbed his attention: the mask definitely showed they were hiding something. And that always made for an interesting fighter. They then proceeded to absolutely obliterate their opponent in the ring. An even more interesting fighter.
After the match, Childe made his way around the back, hoping to speak to this Outlander character. And the rest was history.
It had been the most enjoyable time of his life watching Lumine swap from the diligent student council president, to the powerful, bloodthirsty Outlander. Everything else she did—the way she carried herself, her resilience, her stubbornness, how her face softened when she was thanking him—everything else just pulled at his heart like nothing else ever had.
He really couldn’t bear to stay away.
Childe sighed, continuing his walk down the beach.
And he really couldn’t control himself around her.
A group of boys around his age jogged past him. He caught a few words they were saying as they passed: “hot,” “blonde,” “fighter.”
His jaw clenched, and he followed them closely as the sinking feeling grew in his gut.
The boys disappeared into a large, boisterous crowd, and Childe peered over the heads of spectators watching a wrestling match before them.
A flash of amber eyes and that gray t-shirt she had thrown on earlier; it was exactly as he suspected. Somewhere, somehow, even at the beach on vacation, Lumine was in the middle of a fight.
She was winning, but sloppily. Obviously, she was still affected by earlier. Sloppy moves would lead to defeat, and more importantly, injuries.
Time to step in.
Perhaps this was also a way to get through to her. A common tongue they both spoke.
He made his way over to the sign-up, paid his entrance fee, and stood before the printed brackets. He traced Lumine’s name, looking over the line of opponents he would need to beat to get to her.
He walked over to the queue of fighters. He started stretching his limbs, feeling the heat of the battle pool in his muscles.
Get ready, Lumine.
The crowd burst into cheers as Lumine pinned her opponent to the ground. As she stood, Childe saw her glowing grin split across her face. He smiled to himself as well.
Here I come.
* * *
[part 9]
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Jesus flipping tables: a more accurate & respectful reading
This post shares a large chunk of chapter two of Amy-Jill Levine’s book Entering the Passion of Jesus. (Read the whole chapter as a PDF here.) Levine is a Jewish woman who is also a Professor of New Testament Studies.
Levine combats traditional readings of the text with their antisemitic layers by evincing how Jesus’s anger reflects the anger of his predecessors Jeremiah and Zechariah — an anger focused not on the simple fact that sacrificial animals were sold in the Temples’ outer courts, but on the way the Temple (like many of our worship spaces today) had become a safe place for corrupt oppressors, who behaved as if their daily atrocities would be overlooked by God if they paid for a sacrifice every now and again.
TL;DR: to sum up Levine’s points, she evinces how:
Jesus’s whole table flipping, whip-wielding stunt is more symbolic than practical (echoing similar stunts pulled by his people’s prophets).
Some have argued Jesus is mad about gentiles not being allowed to worship in the temple, but they very much were welcome. (There were places and rituals off limits to them, just as there are certain things non-members can’t do in our own worship spaces, like take communion or be on a committee).
Jesus wasn’t pissed about animals being sold in the temple’s outer courts; that was normal and logical. There’s also no evidence of exploitation or unjust prices, so he’s not angry about the poor being cheated here either.
Jesus did not reject the Temple, or its laws & rituals! He followed them himself and helped restore people to them. (He even has “zeal for his father’s house.”)
Jesus also isn’t condemning the high priest or other priests with his actions here. That’s just not in the text; plus Caiaphas’s worry about Jesus’s actions inciting political violence that could harm his people were reasonable.
What Jesus is communicating with his table flipping and whip-wielding: he’s upset that the Temple is as “a den of thieves,” a place where people who sin and oppress in their everyday life feel perfectly comfortable, instead of feeling called to repent and reform. His words hearken back to previous prophets with similar concerns.
And finally, in the version of this story told in John’s Gospel, Jesus seems to be looking forward to a time when the Temple is no longer needed, for all places will be sacred and God will speak directly to everyone of every nation -- once again, Jesus is hearkening back to previous prophets who looked forward to the same thing. This is also a concept that the Pharisees were into, so stop depicting the Pharisees as “evil” or “backwards” or completely at odds with Jesus! (One key difference between Jesus’s vision and the Pharisees’ if of course that Jesus identifies a “new temple,” his own body.)
One last thing: if you’re unfamiliar with the various Gospel versions of the “temple cleansing” -- Matthew 21:12-17, Mark 11:11-17, Luke 19:45-46, and John 2:13-17 -- or want to reference them as you read this post, visit this webpage to read them all.
Without further ado -- the excerpt from Levine.
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The incident known as the ‘Cleansing of the Temple’ is described in all four Gospels. Most people have the idea--probably from Hollywood--that this is a huge disruption. When we see this scene depicted in movies, we find Jesus fuming with anger, and we inevitably see gold coins falling down in slow motion. Everything in the Temple comes to a standstill. ...But we are not watching a movie: we are studying the Gospels.
Here's what we know about the actual setting. We begin by noting that the Temple complex was enormous. It was the size of twelve soccer fields put end to end. So, if Jesus turns over a table or two in one part of the complex, it's not going to make much of a difference given the size of the place.
The action therefore did not stop all business; it is symbolic rather than practical. Our responsibility is to determine what was symbolized.
For that, we need to know how the Temple functioned.
The Jerusalem Temple, which King Herod the Great began to rebuild and which was still under construction at the time of Jesus, had several courts. The inner sanctum, known as the "Holy of Holies," is where the high priest entered, only on Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement, to ask for forgiveness for himself and for the people. Outside of that was the Court of the Priests, then the Court of Israel, the Court of the Women, and then the Court of the Gentiles, who were welcome to worship in the Temple.
The outer court, the Court of the Gentiles, is where the vendors sold their goods. The Temple at the time of Jesus was many things: it was a house of prayer for all nations; it was the site for the three pilgrimage festivals of Passover, Shavuot/Pentecost, and Sukkot/Booths; it was a symbol of Jewish tradition (we might think of it as comparable, for the Jewish people of the time, to how Americans might view the Statue of Liberty); it was the national bank, and it was the only place in the Jewish world where sacrifices could be offered. Therefore, there needed to be vendors on site.
Pilgrims who sought to offer doves (such as Mary and Joseph do, following the birth of Jesus, according to Luke 2:24) or a sheep for the Passover meal would not bring the animals with them from Galilee or Egypt or Damascus. They would not risk the animal becoming injured and so unfit for sacrifice. The animal might fly or wander away, be stolen, or die. And, as one of my students several years ago remarked, "The pilgrims might get hungry on the way." One bought one's offering from the vendors.
And, despite Hollywood, and sermon after sermon, there is no indication that the vendors were overcharging or exploiting the population. The people would not have allowed that to happen. Thus, Jesus is not engaging in protest of cheating the poor.
Next, we need to think of the Temple as something other than what we think of churches. A church, usually, is a place of quiet and decorum. ...The Temple was something much different: It was a tourist attraction, especially during the pilgrimage festivals. It was very crowded, and it was noisy. The noise was loud and boisterous, and because it was Passover, people were happy because they were celebrating the Feast of Freedom. ...We might think of the setting as a type of vacation for the pilgrims: a chance to leave their homes, to catch up with friends and relatives, to see the "big city," and to feel a special connection with their fellow Jews and with God. It is into this setting that Jesus comes.
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Driving out the Vendors
...It seems to me that Jesus, in the Temple, was angry. But what so angered him? I hear from a number of people, whether my students in class or congregations who have invited me to speak with them, that the Temple must have been a dreadful institution; that it exploited the poor; that it was in cahoots with Rome; that Caiaphas, the High Priest in charge of the Temple, was a terrible person; that it banned Gentiles from worship and so displayed hatred of foreigners; and so forth. ...Some tell me that the Temple imposed oppressive purity laws that forbade people from entering, and so Jesus, who rejected those laws, rejected the temple as well. No wonder Jesus wants to destroy the institution.
But none of those views fits what we know about either Jesus or history.
First, Jesus did not hate the Temple, and he did not reject it. If he did, then it makes no sense that his followers continued to worship there. Jesus himself calls the Temple "my Father's house" (Luke 7:49: John 2:16). ...
Second, Jesus is not opposed to purity laws. To the contrary, he restores people to states of ritual purity. Even more, he tells a man whom he has cured of leprosy, "Go, show yourself to the priest, and offer for your cleansing what Moses commanded, as a testimony to them" (Mark 1:44; see also Matthew 8:4; Luke 5:14).
Third, Jesus says nothing about the Temple exploiting the population. As we'll see in the next chapter, when we talk about the widow who makes an offering of her two coins, Jesus is concerned not with what the Temple charges, but with the generosity of the worshipers.
Fourth, we've already seen that the Temple has an outer court, where Gentiles are welcome to worship. They were similarly welcome in the synagogues of antiquity, and today. They do not have the same rights and responsibilities as do Jews, and that makes sense as well. When I [a Jewish woman] visit a church, there are certain things I may not do. We might also think of how nations function: Canadians, for example, cannot do certain things in the USA, such as vote for president; nor can citizens of the USA vote in Canadian elections.
As for Caiaphas...Caiaphas is basically between a rock and a hard place. He is the nominal head of Judea, and he is supposed to keep the peace. Judea is occupied by Rome, and Roman soldiers are stationed there. Caiaphas needs to make sure that these soldiers do not go on the attack. He needs to placate Pilate, and he needs to placate Rome.
At the same time, as the High Priest, he has a responsibility to the Jewish tradition. Rome wanted the Jews to offer sacrifices to the emperor...but Caiaphas and the other Jews refused to participate in this type of offering because they would not worship the emperor. The most they were willing to do was offer sacrifices on behalf of the emperor and the empire.
When Jesus comes into the city in the Triumphal Entry, when people are hailing him as son of David, Caiaphas recognizes the political danger. The Gospel of John tells us that the people wanted to make Jesus king (John 6:15). Caiaphas has to watch out for the mob. Caiaphas also has to watch out for all these Jewish pilgrims coming from all over the empire celebrating the Feast of Freedom, the end of slavery. When he sees Roman troops surrounding the Temple Mount, Caiaphas has to keep the peace. And Jesus is a threat to that peace. But none of this has to do directly with Jesus' actions in the Temple. He is not at this point protesting Caiaphas's role.
Sometimes I hear people say that Jesus drove the "money lenders” out of the Temple. That's wrong, too. Money-lending was a business into which the medieval church forced Jews, because the church concluded that charging interest was unnatural (money should not beget money). Yet people needed, then and now, to take out loans. The issue for the Gospel is not money lending but money changing. These money changers exchanged the various currencies of the Roman Empire into Tyrian shekels, the type of silver coin that the Temple accepted. We experience the same process when we visit a foreign country and have to exchange our money for the local currency.
So, if Jesus is not condemning the Temple itself, or financial exploitation, or purity practices, what is he condemning? Let's look at what the Gospels actually say.
According to Matthew, Mark, and Luke, ...the concern is not the Temple, but the attitude of the people who are coming to it.
In Mark's account Jesus begins by saying, "Is it not written, 'My house shall be called a house of prayer for all the nations?" (11:17). Indeed, it is so written. Jesus is here condensing and then quoting Isaiah 56:6-7... Jesus' rhetorical question should be answered with a resounding “Yes!"--for the Temple already was a house of prayer for all people. More, he is standing in the Court of the Gentiles when he makes his pronouncement. ...Thus, the problem is not that the Temple excludes Gentiles.
Already we find the challenge, and the risk. Are churches Today houses of prayer for all people, or are they just for people who look like us, walk like us, and talk like us?
How do we make other people feel welcome? Is the stranger greeted upon walking into the church? Is the first thing a stranger hears in the sanctuary, "You're in my seat"? When we pray or sing hymns, do we think of what those words would sound like in a stranger's ears? ...
Matthew and Luke drop out "For all nations," and appropriately so, for they knew it already was a house of prayer for all nations. Matthew and Luke thus change the focus to one of prayer. And prayer gets us closer to what is going on in the Synoptic tradition.
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Den of Thieves
Jesus continues, ‘But you are making it a den of robbers’ (Matthew 21:13). Here he is quoting Jeremiah 7:11: “Has this house, which is called by my name, become a den of robbers in your sight?”
A "den of robbers" (sometimes translated a "den of thieves") is not where robbers rob. "Den” really means "cave," and a cave of robbers is where robbers go after they have taken what does not belong to them, and count up their loot. The context of Jeremiah's quotation -- and remember, it always helps to look up the context of citations to the Old Testament -- tells us this.
Jeremiah 7:9-10 depicts the ancient prophet as condemning the people of his own time, the time right before Babylonians destroyed Solomon's Temple over five hundred years earlier: “Will you steal, murder, commit adultery, swear falsely, make offerings to Baal, and go after other gods that you have not known, and then come and stand before me in this house, which is called by my name, and say, ‘We are safe!’ -- only to go on doing all these abominations?"
Some people in Jeremiah's time, and at the time of Jesus, and today, take divine mercy for granted and see worship as an opportunity to show off new clothes rather than recommit to clothing the naked. The present-day comparison to what Jeremiah, and Jesus, condemned is easy to make: The church member sins during the workweek, either by doing what is wrong or by failing to do what is right. Then on Sunday morning this same individual, perhaps convinced of personal righteousness, heartily sings the hymns, happily shakes the hands of others, and generously puts a fifty-collar bill in the collection plate. That makes the church a den of robbers -- a cave of sinners. It becomes a safe place for those who are not truly repentant and who do not truly follow what Jesus asks. The church becomes a place of showboating, not of fishing for people.
Jeremiah and Jesus indicted people then, and now. The ancient Temple, and the present-day church, should be places where people not only find community, welcome the stranger, and repent of their sins. They should be places where people promise to live a godly life, and then keep their promises. ...
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Stop Making My Father's House a Marketplace
John's Gospel says nothing about the house of prayer or den of robbers. In John's Gospel, Jesus starts not simply by overturning the tables, but also by using a “whip of cords" (since weapons were not permitted in the Temple, he may have fashioned the whip from straw at hand), and driving out the vendors. Jesus when says to the dove sellers, "Take these things out of here! Stop making my Father's house a marketplace!" (John 2:16). He is alluding to Zechariah 14:21, the last verse from this prophet, "and every cooking pot in Jerusalem and Judah shall be sacred to the Lord of hosts, so that all who sacrifice may come and use them to boil the flesh of the sacrifice. And there shall no longer be traders in the house of the Lord of hosts on that day."
In John's version of the Temple incident, Jesus anticipates the time when there will no longer be a need for vendors, for every house not only in Jerusalem but in all of Judea shall be like the Temple itself. The sacred nature of the Temple will spread through all the people. He sounds somewhat like the Pharisees here, since the Pharisees were interested in extending the holiness of the Temple to every household.
The message is a profound one: Can our homes be as sanctified, as filled with Worship, as the local church?
Do we “do our best" on Sunday From 11 a.m. to 12 noon, but just engage in business is usual during the workweek? Do we pray only in church, or is prayer part of our daily practice? Do we celebrate the gifts of God only when it is time to do so in the worship service, or do we celebrate these gifts morning to night? Is the church just a building, or is the church the community who gathers in Jesus' name, who acts as Jesus taught, who lives the good news?
Jesus' words, citing Zechariah, do even more. They anticipate a time when all peoples, all nations, can worship in peace, and in love. There is no separation between home and house of worship, because the entire land lives in a sanctified state. Perhaps we can even hear a hint of Jeremiah's teaching of the "new covenant," when "no longer shall they teach one another, or say to each other, 'Know the LORD,’ For they shall all know me, from the least of them to the greatest, says the LORD; for I will forgive their iniquity, and remember their sin no more" (Jeremiah 31:34). Can we envision this? Can we work toward it? ...
#amy jill levine#flipping tables#the cleansing of the temple#lent#bible study#reading and studying the bible#spring 2021#lent 2021#gospels#long post#readings#countering antisemitism
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Revelations (Spencer Reid x fem!MC)
Summary: SPOILERS FOR SEASON TWO As everything goes down with Tobias Hankel, Aria and the BAU have to find him before it’s too late. Once they do, Aria takes Spencer home and comforts him.
Content: Angst, Hurt/Comfort
Warnings: Descriptions of torture and violence (all related to Reid’s abduction in season two), swearing, kidnapping and emotional turmoil
MC’s name and pronouns: Aria (are-ee-ah) Glenn, she/her
Word Count: 5024 (it’s a long one folks so buckle up - it ended up being almost ten full pages lmao)
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“Hey,” I looked up from my phone to see Emily standing in the doorway. “Can I sit?”
I gestured to the space on the bed beside me, in the small house that made me nauseous. Thinking about the fact that the bed I was sitting on right now belonged to the man who had kidnapped Spencer made me want to both punch something and throw up. Emily came and sat beside me, turning to face me as I did the same. Her voice was soft when she spoke, studying my face.
“How are you doing?” She asked. It was a question she already knew the answer to, and I scoffed.
“We’re both profilers, Prentiss. You tell me; how do you think I’m doing?” I snapped. Immediately afterwards, guilt flared through my chest, and I sighed, shaking my head. “I’m sorry. It’s just - well, you know. I don’t think any of us are in a good state of mind right now.”
I dropped my gaze back to my hands, resting in my lap. She took them, directing my attention back to her as she spoke.
“Glenn. We all care about Reid, and we’re all doing everything we possibly can to get him back. But I know that your relationship with him is… different. You kind of disappeared earlier, I just wanted to check on you.”
“I just couldn’t watch that anymore,” My chest tightened just thinking about the sight of Spencer, tied to a chair, being forced to decide who lives and who dies. He looked so broken -
I forced myself away from that train of thought, taking my hands out of Emily’s to press them to my eyes in an attempt to ward away the tears I felt rising again.
I’ve cried so much in the past two days I wasn’t sure I’d ever be able to again.
“I understand,” She moved my hands so I’d look into her eyes again. “I just wanted you to know we’re all here for you, ok? We’re all in this together, we’re all worried about him. You’re not alone in what you’re feeling.”
I nodded, and she pulled me into a tight hug, one I returned gratefully. The moment was interrupted by Derek flying into the room, with a statement that made my heart drop.
“The live feed is back on,” He announced, clearly intending for Emily and I to come with him. I knew that watching the videos was the best way for us to figure out where the hell this guy took Spencer, but the idea of seeing him in that cabin again made me want to throw up. I immediately started to shake my head, a childlike reflex to the statement.
“No. No, I can’t, I -” I wanted nothing more than to be curled up in his arms right now.
This all felt like one massive nightmare. I wished I could just wake up, scared before I realized he was safe in his apartment, laying in bed with me. I would turn over and press a quick kiss to his lips, not enough to wake him up but enough that I could appreciate his presence even more after imagining the worst possibility, before burying myself back in the warmth of his embrace…
“Aria. Hey,” Emily had her hand on my arm, pulling me out of my fantasy. My mind had started to take over, to take me into a daydream that was safer than the turmoil that had become our reality. “I know this is hard. But the more people we have working on this, the better the odds of us finding him are.”
“I hate to say it, but you guys need to hurry. We have no idea how long he’s going to be live.”
I felt like I was going to pass out when I stood up, making my way into the computer room that had become Garcia’s base for the past two days. My attention focused immediately on the screen displaying the live feed of Spencer. Emily was still standing next to me, and she reached out, giving my arm a quick squeeze to make sure I knew she was right there. I nodded my appreciation, but I couldn’t break my eyes away from the video.
He looked exhausted. Exhausted, and in pain, physically and mentally.
I didn’t know how much more of this he could handle.
“This ends now.” Charles Hankel’s voice was one I knew would be at the center of my nightmares for years to come; and if that was how I felt, I couldn’t imagine what Spencer was feeling right now. I didn’t think I wanted to. “Confess your sins.”
I dug my nails into my palms, trying to steady my breathing. I could tell Spencer was trying not to cry, and for a moment I thought Charles wasn’t going to do anything before he moved closer to the chair, punching him hard in the face. A sob escaped my lips, and I clamped my hand over my mouth, trying to silence myself as I watched him beat him, over and over, demanding he confess to the sins he hasn’t committed.
I looked around the room, and I knew we were all feeling a very similar set of emotions right now. It’s just a matter of what was the strongest. Garcia was trembling from her seat in front of the computers. Derek looked like he was going to genuinely kill somebody, and JJ looked like she was going to be sick. Hotch and Gideon were watching with nothing but fatherly worry, and even Emily looked like she couldn’t breathe.
“Tobias, help me,” His voice was so quiet we could hardly hear it through the camera speaker, Spencer begging for some kind of rescue. He was crying openly now, and I knew that I was silently doing the same as Charles hit him again before pushing the chair backwards, causing Spencer to fall to the ground.
At first I thought he’d passed out. But then I noticed him convulsing.
“Oh my god,” Garcia was the first one to say something, her voice breaking as we watched Spencer gasping for air, unable to do anything but observe from the other side of a screen, “He’s killing him.”
I felt myself starting to spiral again, unable to even speak, wanting so badly to leave but knowing I’d never forgive myself if I did. So I stood there and watched the man I love thrash on the ground while Charles Hankel just stood over him, watching him die without even blinking. It wasn’t until Spencer stopped moving that he spoke.
“That’s the devil vacating your body.”
Spencer wasn’t moving.
Spencer Reid was dead.
He was lying dead on the floor in a cabin in the middle of who-the-fuck knows where and there was absolutely nothing I could do to help him.
Suddenly I couldn’t breathe.
“No…” Was all I was able to say. I couldn’t tear my eyes away from the image of Spencer’s body on the floor, still tied to that chair, abandoned as Charles Hankel left the room, leaving the camera still rolling. Gideon stormed out of the room - I thought I heard the bathroom door slam - and everyone immediately jumped into action, leaving Garcia and I alone staring at the unchanging computer screen.
“Come on baby, wake up. Please, for the love of god, please wake up.”
It felt like my mind was speedrunning the five stages of grief as I muttered under my breath, begging to a man who couldn’t even hear me. Who had no control over whether he lived or died.
Garcia hadn’t moved either, her breath coming in shallow gasps as she stared at the screen. I moved over to her, grabbing her hand in mine, both of us trying desperately to comfort each other after the scene we just witnessed, unable to process what happened enough to even speak. After a moment, Hotch came back into the room, opening his mouth to say something to Penelope when something finally changed on the video in front of us.
Charles Hankel had come back into the room.
Except it wasn’t Charles this time, it was Tobias, running over to Spencer’s body and immediately starting CPR in an attempt to save his life. Hotch called everyone back into the room, all of us gathered around the screen. After what felt like years, we heard it.
Spencer finally coughed.
He woke up, and I thought I was going to cry from relief. I might’ve actually been crying; honestly I’d spent most of the last two days in a constant state of either crying or about-to-be crying, so it wouldn’t have come as much surprise. Everyone let out varying gasps of relief before getting to work again, deducing that Hankel would have to be within a 17-mile radius of the crime scene to have killed those people and then uploaded the video in the time frame that he did. Hotch was about to leave before we noticed Hankel’s demeanor change yet again as he stood over Spencer, who was still stuck on the floor.
“You came back to life.”
“Raphael.”
“There can be only one of two reasons.”
“I was given CPR.”
“There are no accidents.”
Whatever momentary relief I got from seeing Spencer alive faded the moment Raphael began to ask questions.
Questions about us.
“He thinks it’s Revelation,” Hotch stated, concern filling his usually even tone. “The 7 Archangels versus the 7 Angels of Death.”
“Tell me who you serve.”
“I serve you.”
“Then choose one to die.”
My hand flew back up to my mouth as I processed the command, watching Spencer’s face crumble with the realization as well.
“Kill me.” The words made my heart break, and I found myself desperately fighting the edge of tears, yet again.
Damn, I really hated having emotions.
“Tell me who dies.”
“No.”
Raphael reached into his jacket pocket, pulling out a revolver and pointing it straight at Spencer’s forehead. It was a game of Russian Roulette, and I genuinely thought I might puke from the omnipresent anxiety making my knees weak.
“I can’t -” I broke, turning away from the screen and into Derek’s arms as he pulled me into a hug. I hated not watching, but it was more than I could bear. It was all I could do just to listen as Spencer denied his request over and over again, each time the click of the trigger bringing him closer and closer to a bullet in the brain.
“I choose… Aaron Hotchner.”
The sentence made me snap my gaze back to the screen, not breaking the hug but watching attentively as Spencer quoted a Bible verse. Hotch, however, left the room as soon as Spencer had finished speaking, everyone trailing out into the main room after him.
“Hey, he’s alive. He’s alive,” Derek comforted me as everyone followed Hotch.
It’s truly a sign of how fucked up the situation is when the only comfort is that he hasn’t died yet.
Or at least, not permanently.
I nodded, and broke the hug, following after everyone who had already found Hotch again. He was holding a Bible, quickly explaining that Spencer misquoted the verse.
Misquoted the verse on purpose.
We’d found him.
We piled into the cars, my heart racing a mile a minute as we sped down the abandoned country roads, pulling up to an empty plantation, with nothing but trees in sight for miles aside from a small cabin and a cemetery surrounding it.
We checked the cabin first.
Clear.
It wasn’t until we started making our way across the grounds that we heard it.
A gunshot.
“Oh god please don’t let that have been for Reid,” JJ echoed exactly what the rest of us were thinking. We followed the sound, Hotch calling out his name as we ran towards it. Finally, we saw him, hunched over the dying body of Tobias Hankel.
Hotch took off in a sprint, approaching Spencer first, placing a gentle hand on his arm before Spencer pulled him into a tearful hug. He did the same to JJ, until I finally moved into view.
He looked like he’d been to hell and back. He could hardly support his own weight, he was sweating, bruised, and there was an open wound on his forehead. But I’d never been happier to see him.
I wasted no time pulling him into a hug, finally not trying to keep the tears at bay. For a moment, neither of us said anything, we just held each other, both of us crying in the cold night air.
“I thought I’d lost you,” I finally said, pulling back from the hug to look at his eyes. A small smile came over his face, and I’d never seen anything more beautiful. He was still crying, and I brought my hands up to cup his face, wiping the tears from his cheeks. He was very clearly out of it, and I guided him to put his arm around my shoulders, helping him walk back to the cars, whispering reassurances the entire way there.
“Wait!” He protested, “I have to do something first.”
He turned back towards Tobias’ body, and I let him go, giving him a moment to do whatever it was he needed as he limped over to the corpse. I turned back to the team, noticing Hotch looking at me with curiosity. Seeing as the only person who knows about Spencer and I’s relationship was Emily, it didn’t really come as a shock that I’d be getting strange looks. But honestly, I couldn’t bring myself to care.
“He’s probably going to need to go to a hospital,” Hotch said. We nodded our agreement, knowing there was an ambulance waiting back at Tobias Hankel’s house.
Spencer rejoined the group, and I helped him the rest of the way back to the car. I wanted nothing more than to hold him in the backseat, but there wasn’t enough space and I didn’t want to draw more suspicion by asking JJ to move. So I climbed into the front seat next to Derek, who was driving. He shot me a look, and I just shrugged, not confirming or denying anything.
The drive back felt significantly shorter now that he was safe with us, and when we got back, we followed the ambulance to the hospital. Despite the fact that they definitely didn’t need an 8-person FBI escort to take Spencer into the hospital, Gideon didn’t even ask us whether or not we wanted to go. It was just assumed.
We’d gathered in the waiting room, everyone waiting to hear the extent of what that monster put him through. I was sitting in the chair closest to the hall, and immediately sprang to my feet when I saw the doctor round the corner.
“What all did he do to him?” I demanded.
“He had a pretty nasty gash on his forehead that we had to stitch up,” He started, “And his face is pretty bruised. Same with the bottom of his left foot. It’s a miracle it wasn’t broken.”
We nodded along to him speaking, and he paused for a second before revealing the worst detail.
“We also found a series of needle marks on his right arm. Traces of Dilaudid were still in his system.”
We’d assumed they’d drugged him - he wouldn’t have seized the way he did if they hadn’t, not to mention that JJ found records of Tobias Hankel’s addiction to narcotics - but hearing confirmation made my chest tight.
“What does that mean for him?” Hotch asked.
“Well, Dilaudid is addictive. It’s a narcotic painkiller; you’ll want to keep an eye on him in the next couple of weeks and note any strange behaviors you might see him exhibiting.”
We all nodded our understanding, and the doctor wrapped up what he was saying.
“Other than that, he just needs rest. We gave him water and something to eat, so honestly the best thing for him right now is to go home, get a shower and get some sleep. He might have some trouble putting a lot of weight on his right foot, but there’s not really anything we can do for that because it isn’t actually broken, just badly bruised. We’re going to send him home with crutches, but someone might want to stay with him for tonight, if one of you is comfortable with that.”
“I’ll stay with him,” I offered before anyone else could open their mouths. Emily’s eyes snapped to mine, and I cleared my throat, trying not to sound too eager, “If he’s ok with that, of course. I’ll have to ask him.”
The doctor just nodded. “Sounds good. Whoever is in charge here can see the front desk for further information.”
Gideon started towards the front desk, gesturing for Hotch to follow him as they went to talk to some people, leaving me standing in front of Garcia, Morgan, Prentiss, and JJ, all of whom were looking at me with varying looks of suspicion. Except Emily, who just looked vaguely amused.
“Anything you want to talk to us about, Glenn?” JJ asked.
“Nothing at all,” I denied, trying to fight the small smile on my face. I could tell just by looking at them that they all knew, at this point it was hard not to at least assume. Not to mention they were all experts in human behavior - let’s just say it was hard to hide things from them. But JJ just shook her head with a shallow laugh, returning to her seat. However, she quickly stood back up when Spencer came around the corner, supporting his weight with a pair of plain gray crutches.
“Spence,” She immediately crossed the room to him, looking him over with concern, “How are you feeling?”
“Better,” He offered her a small smile, but it wasn’t real. We all knew it, and she pulled
him into a hug, being careful not to make him fall.
“I should’ve never let you go off on your own. I’m so sorry -” She started to apologize, but he cut her off.
“JJ, stop. It’s not your fault; splitting up was my idea. No one had any way of knowing what was going to happen. I mean, there was a 50-50 shot that either of us could’ve run into him, we had no evidence he’d even left the barn at all.”
She let out a shaky breath, nodding. “I’m just glad you’re ok.”
“Me too.”
“We’re going to go back to the BAU so everyone can get their cars.”
He nodded his understanding, and he gave everyone a hug before Hotch and Gideon came back from the front desk. As much as he tried to appear normal, the events of the past two days hung heavy in the air. And we only knew what we saw on the videos, we had no idea the extent of what he’d gone through. I don’t know if we ever would.
Even just the fact that he was hugging people was a testament to the way he was feeling. He usually didn’t even like to shake hands, but he was clinging to our friends like they were the only thing keeping him grounded.
Hotch and Gideon rounded the corner, Hotch’s face softening the moment he saw Spencer, pulling him into another hug.
“Alright, let’s get back to the BAU so you can go home and get some rest,” Gideon said. Spencer nodded, all of us piling back into the two vans we’d taken to Tobias Hankel’s house. JJ shot me a look before climbing into the passenger seat, allowing me to take her place in the back with Spencer, sitting shoulder to shoulder in the car. Once we started driving, I turned and whispered to him.
“I wanted to come back home with you. Is that ok?” I asked. He gave me a small nod, and I smiled, giving his arm a squeeze. I desperately wanted to press a soft kiss to his lips, but I had already been way too physically affectionate with him today for us being at work.
We all went our separate ways, though it was clear that everyone was reluctant to let Spencer out of their sight again. I reminded them I’d be with him, and promised that I’d update them once he fell asleep so they knew everyone was ok. It might’ve been selfish of me, but I was excited to be alone with him. I just wanted to be able to comfort him without having to worry about if everyone thought we were dating.
To be fair, we technically weren’t dating. We’d never really defined the relationship.
We elected to take my car, since I was going to be driving. The more time we spent away from the group, the more I saw Spencer retreating. We walked to the car in silence, and he climbed in the passenger seat, zoning out staring through the windshield.
I reached over and gave his hand a light squeeze.
“I love you babe. Don’t know what I’d do without you,” I told him. He didn’t move his gaze, just squeezed my hand back in response before allowing me to return both hands to the wheel. We drove the rest of the way home with no sound but the radio turned down to a low volume. When I finally pulled into the parking lot for his apartment complex, he didn’t even blink. I turned the car off, going around to the other side to help him out of the car and into his apartment.
“Do you want me to get you something to eat? Or some water?” I offered as I unlocked the front door. He just shook his head.
“I just want to go to sleep.”
“You need to shower, Spencer.”
He nodded again, allowing me to lead him to the bathroom.
“Do you think you can stand? Or do you want me to draw you a bath?” I asked.
“Bath would be better,” He said, propping his crutches up against the sink. I knew he hadn’t broken his foot, but he still winced as he put more of his weight on it so that he could pull off his sweater and begin to unbutton the shirt he had on underneath it.
“You’re ok with me being in here?” I had assumed he would be, but I wanted to clarify as he finished unbuttoning his shirt, slipping it off. He just nodded, starting to undo his pants as I filled the bath with warm water. I shut the water off when it was filled enough that he could sit comfortably in it, and I held his arm, helping him sink into the warm water.
“Do you want my help babe?” I asked. He nodded again, still not speaking. I didn’t try to press him with any conversation, I just slipped out of my work clothes and slid into the bath next to him, grabbing the washcloth from the side of the bathtub and dipping it in the warm water, lathering up the soap and starting to gently wash along his shoulders, scrubbing away the dirt and grime. He winced when I got to his wrists, and I noticed that the skin was rubbed raw, red from where he’d been restrained. I drew in a shaky breath, unsure of whether or not I was going to cry or punch someone. Instead, I just planted a soft kiss on his lips before washing down the rest of his body.
I put the washcloth away and moved on to his hair, moving so that my chest was pressed to his back. I lathered the shampoo through his hair, and he sunk back against me, his eyes closing from the gentle touch.
“You’re safe with me, baby. I’ve got you,” I whispered reassurances in his ear, trying to help him relax as I finished cleaning him up. “How’s your head?”
My eyes had flashed up to the bandaged gash on his forehead, and I reached one hand up to gently brush his hair back away from it. He had opened his eyes now, just staring at the water, not really here. His voice was barely above a whisper, and it broke my heart.
“It hurts,” He murmured.
“I’m so sorry, Spencer,” I said, holding him closer to me as if it could somehow soothe his pain, both physically and mentally. “I am so, so sorry that this happened to you. You didn’t deserve any of this.”
“Didn’t I?”
The question took me by surprise, and I didn’t even have a chance to protest before he elaborated.
“I abandoned my mother. I could’ve helped her - I mean, I could’ve learned to help her. Instead I sent her away… he told me to confess my sins. And when I thought of my sins, all I could see was her face. I left her, Aria.”
“Spencer. Look at me.” I lightly put my hand under his chin, guiding him to meet my eyes. “Your mother needed help from a medical professional, someone who was specialized in understanding her condition. You didn’t abandon her - Spencer, you helped her. It’s not a sin to get someone the help that they need.”
“I know that. Logically, I know that. But…”
He trailed off, but he didn’t need to say anymore. I just nodded.
“I know, baby. But you didn’t deserve what Hankel did to you. You’re a good person, Spencer Reid. One of the best I know, and I’m not just saying that because I’m in love with you. You really are an incredible man, and,” I bit my lip, forcing back the tears that were stinging my eyes, “And you deserved so much better than this.”
He didn’t reply, he just leaned forward, kissing me again. It was harder this time, like he was putting all his feelings into moving his lips against mine. I kissed him back with just as much emotion, trying to tell him how much I loved him without saying anything at all.
“Thank you,” He whispered, and I wrapped my arms around him, holding him close to me for a moment.
“Spencer, you have no idea how grateful I am for you.”
“And I for you,” He replied semi-dramatically, making me grin and bringing a small smile to his face. It wasn’t much, but it was something positive.
“Alright Shakespeare, let me get dried off and then I’ll help you out,” I teased, grabbing my towel off the hook and drying my damp hair before wrapping it around myself and grabbing his hand, helping him up and guiding him to lean up against the sink while I grabbed his towel and offered it to him.
“I don’t even have the energy to correct the historical inaccuracy of your Shakespeare joke,” He said, drying himself off as I left the bathroom to grab pajamas from his dresser. I grabbed him one of his t-shirts and a pair of sweatpants, and I grabbed myself one of his sweaters, slipping it on before going back into the bathroom and giving him the clothes I’d grabbed, hanging my towel back up as he changed.
When I turned back, he’d put on the pajamas, and was in the process of grabbing his crutches. With every move, his expression changed, betraying just how much pain he was in. I put my hand on his shoulder, supporting him as he made his way back out to his room, immediately sitting down on the bed and letting the crutches fall to the ground.
“Son of a bitch,” He muttered. I just sat down next to him, putting my arm around him so he could lean his head on my shoulder.
“Hey. You’re alright,” I held him close to me, rubbing his shoulder in a slight comfort.
“I’m tired,” He yawned, and I nodded.
He stretched out on the bed behind me, and I scooted over next to him, pulling the comforter over both of us.
“Can I hold you, baby?” I asked. He nodded, and I curled up against him, holding him tight to my chest. I tucked my head into the crook of his neck from behind, feeling his steady breathing against me.
It didn’t really surprise me when I felt his breathing pick up - I assumed his mind would probably wander once he had quiet time to think - but it made my heart wrench when I heard him crying softly.
“Spencer…” I pulled him closer to me, running one hand through his hair and placing soft kisses along his jawline, trailing down his neck. There was nothing sexual about it, simply gentle affection as he cried.
He rolled over suddenly so he was facing me, immediately crushing me in a tight hug, crying openly into my shoulder. I continued to run one of my hands through his hair, the other gently tracing slow circles on his back under his shirt, trying to ground him as he attempted to process everything he’d gone through.
“You’re safe with me baby. I’m never letting anything happen to you again, I promise.”
“You can’t make a promise like that,” He argued through his tears, “No one can make a promise like that. You know our line of work; there’s no way you can ensure my safety.”
“That’s true,” I conceded, “But as long as I have any say in it, I will protect you. And that’s a promise.”
His crying had quieted, and he sniffled, nodding into my shoulder. I kept him close to me, and eventually he drifted off to sleep, tears still staining his face.
#spencer reid#spencer reid fanfiction#criminal minds#criminal minds fanfiction#dr reid#reid#fanfiction#writing#fanfic writer#spencer reid hurt/comfort#hurt/comfort#angst#spencer reid angst#bau#bau fanfiction#female mc#spencer reid x female mc#season two spencer reid#season two reid#spencer reid x fem!mc#criminal minds angst#criminal minds hurt/comfort#tobias hankel#tw: violence#tw: kidnapping#tw: trauma#baby reid#revelations#revelations criminal minds
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Although most of us aren’t able to go on vacation at the moment, we hope this rec list will make everyone feel a bit better than that. Upon request, here is a rec list of bottom Louis fics where Harry, Louis, or both boys go on vacation at some point during the fic. Happy reading!
1) This Is Where I Sleep | Explicit | 3678 words
Harry and Louis go camping while on break and make some memories.
2) Under the Vanilla Sky | Explicit | 8006 words
Who the hell wears a hat like that on a yacht? That's one of the things Louis thinks when he sees Harry from across the deck of the most expensive, ridiculous boat he's ever been on. He also thinks he'd like to get closer. Just to see what's under those aviators. Just to verify that, yes, in fact, those white swim trunks might be a little see-through when wet. Just to see if someone could really be that hot in real life. On a yacht. In the Caribbean sea just off the coast of St. Barts.
Here's what really happened on that yacht.
Or, my opinion, at least.
3) Rather This Than Live Without You | Explicit | 10715 words
Harry decides to give it all up. Louis refuses to be left behind.
4) Ready To Run | Explicit | 11940 words
After being left at the alter by his boyfriend of five years, Louis goes on a vacation to try and clear his head and fill the empty spaces in his heart. On the way, he meets a new group of life-long friends, and maybe a little more than that.
5) I Know You Have A Heavy Heart (I Can Feel It When We Kiss) | Explicit | 14489 words | Sequel
In which Louis is spending New Year’s alone in France but he’s definitely not running away, and Harry is a french florist with an ever present smile who cares a lot. They meet a cold night in the outskirts of Paris.
6) Don’t Put Out The Glow | Not Rated | 15007 words
"He fists out a pair of skinny jeans and a plain black tee. Nothing wrong there. Then he sees an atrocious Hawaiian shirt in Zayn’s hand and he starts digging through the bag urgently, pulling out more and more items that don’t belong to him."
7) Pleasure Over Matter | Explicit | 152014 words
Harry is a bit out of his element, and an unsuspecting stranger provides him temporary relief.
8) All I Want Is To Fall With You | Mature | 16254 words
The weekend ski trip where omega Louis discovers that he can’t change a tire and his skiing skills are debatable but still manages to find the alpha who will change his life.
9) Some Flowers In Your Hair | Explicit | 23015 words
A magical camping AU in which Louis is jealous of Harry's magic, Liam's a little too enthusiastic about surviving in the wilderness, and Niall might have misunderstood the rules.
10) Force of Nature | Mature | 25672 words
Louis is a shy, young musician who doesn't want to go to Harvard.
Harry is a confident, second year athlete who likes to have a good time.
When their paths cross while their families are vacationing at the same lake resort, what begins as a summer of fun becomes a defining journey that might just change everything.
11) A Trail Of Honey Through It All | Explicit | 27085 words
The boy in front of him, well really, the man in front of him, was like something out of a confusing wet dream. Built, tall, tan and muscular, his skin glistened with sweat after a long day of working outdoors with his hands. He was wearing a cut up old American football shirt, the bottom hem was torn and the sleeves were cut off to the point where the t-shirt was really just a loose tank top. The shorts he had on had clearly been full length jeans at one point, and were now just crudely cut off above the knee. His white socks were pulled up too high on his calves, and the brown work boots he had on were old as fuck, the leather peeling along the edges of the soles. Curly brown hair stuck out from the edges of his backwards snapback, and there was a smudge of grease wiped along his brow bone. The smattering of hair along his jaw proved that he hadn’t shaved in a week or two, the hair growing in thicker across his upper lip and around his chin. His sinfully bowed mouth was pink and plump, and Louis was suddenly hyper-focused on the way that he chewed at the toothpick stuck between his lips. He looked like he needed a shower. Louis wanted to lick him.
12) Rivers ‘Til I Reach You | Explicit | 29315 words
AU. Louis studies astronomy; Harry studies Louis. They spend their summers on the water and it shouldn't be complicated (spoiler: it is).
13) The List | Mature | 32094 words
'In the weeks that follow, Harry opens his old journal more than he has in the past two years each time he remembers Venice or thinks about Louis. He always flips to the same random page in the middle of the book, marked by the picture of himself that Louis sent him a few days after they got home. There’s a message on the back that says, ‘Spontaneous looks good on you! See you soon,’ and it makes Harry’s chest warm each time he reads it. He wedges their list out from between the worn pages, and it feels silly staring down at a folded up piece of paper with a strange sense of nostalgia for experiences they’ve yet to have; for places they’ve never even been.'
14) (Your Heartbeat) Rang True Inside My Bones | Explicit | 32945 words
Harry goes as Louis' date for a weekend wedding. He ends up taking the role a bit too seriously.
15) Let Me Feel Your Heartbeat | Explicit | 34572 words
Harry is 98% sure Louis hates him. So he feels like his bewilderment is justified when the omega offers to help him through his rut.
16) And Touch Me Like You | Explicit | 35971 words
The one where Harry and Louis agree to be each other's New Year's kiss and it ends up being a lot more than they bargained for.
17) A Red-Dusted Planet | Explicit | 38265 words
A one-night stand in a small town in Australia turns into a weekend that Harry could've never predicted with a boy he may never forget.
18) A Rhythm In Rush | Explicit | 40010 words
Harry is a WWF journalist with big dreams and Louis is a glaciologist that flies helicopters for fun. Greenland is an odd place to spend Christmas, but just maybe, the perfect place to fall headfirst into love.
19) Nobody Does It Like You | Not Rated | 58520 words
Louis isn't looking for a home, but he finds one in Harry.
20) Waiting For The Tides To Meet | Explicit | 59873 words
Soulmate AU. Everyone is born with heterochromia — one eye is their own eye colour, while the other is the colour of their soulmate's. It's only when they meet their soulmate for the first time that their own eyes match properly. After a hazy night at a frat party, Louis wakes up to blue eyes and the shocking realization that he had met his soulmate, without any sober recollection. Seven years pass where Louis comes to terms with the fact that he'll never know who his soulmate is. Then one fated summer, a beautiful green-eyed photographer arrives at Louis' workplace, with promises of endless laughter and a familiar feeling in Louis' heart.
21) Tug-Of-War | Explicit | 63000
Louis' husband dies suddenly and he is left with nothing. Well, not really nothing. He has Harry. And a St. Bernard puppy named Link, whom his late husband left behind for him. Louis takes care of Link and Harry takes care of Louis. Everything is okay until suddenly, it isn't.
22) This Wicked Game | Explicit | 70010 words
An AU in which The Bachelor is gay, Louis is a contestant, Harry is the bachelor, everyone drinks a lot of champagne, the entire world gets to watch them fall in love, and no one plays by the rules.
23) Don’t Tell the Gods (We Left a Mess) | Explicit | 71556 words
After a misunderstanding with Liam’s mother, Louis agrees to accompany his best friend to a family wedding and pretend to be the world’s best boyfriend. But their simple plan goes awry when he learns that Harry, ex-boyfriend/ex-love of Louis’ life, will also be in attendance. (aka: fake!boyfriends with a twist ft. bromance, romance and cake.)
24) Perfect Storm | Explicit | 80230 words
What do you do when your best friend asks you and your (now) ex to be the best men at his destination wedding? You can either tell him the truth, tell him you’re not together anymore, and deal with the consequences, or you can pretend you’re still together and roll with it, just pray you don’t spiral. Fake it ‘til you make it. You know, for the sake of the wedding.
Harry and Louis choose the latter.
25) Nothing Worsens, Nothing Grows | Explicit | 102528 words
Another roadtrip au featuring Harry as the misunderstood hipster, Louis as the bitter psych major, Liam as the one with the secret boyfriend, and Niall as the one who just wants everyone to be happy.
Check out our other fic rec lists by category here and by title here.
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Chapter 7: Dr. Buford
Chapter 6:
Coming out after a hot bath, Bess meandered around the hotel room and watched the rain drizzle down. The reporter mentioned it would rain every day for the rest of the week. Bummer, how are we going to enjoy New Orleans now? Deep down Bess new that the idea of vacationing was gone now that Nancy found herself a mystery. Joining in on Nancy’s mysteries were fun, and nothing brought a gleam in Nancy’s eyes like a mystery. She’d been like that since they were kids, so really, if it bothered Bess, she would have long stopped being Nancy’s friend. But, she couldn’t deny that it hurt to be tossed aside so easily. The only consolation was the rain, at least Nancy had an excuse to hang out elsewhere.
Through the rain Bess saw the yellow-green hue emanating from the sign of Zeke’s curio shop. It really was a doozy of a place, though Bess felt bad that she dumped a bottle of sneezing powder onto Lamont. The poor guy didn’t even suspect her and blamed customers moving things around. Out of the corner of her eye she noticed the food truck and an old man who sat at a patio table reading a newspaper. Bess’s stomach rumbled. Well, it wouldn’t hurt to eat a bit while finding out about the old man.
Bess hurried over to the food truck and placed an order for crawfish. She then moved towards the old man and asked if she could sit by his side while she ate.
“Now why would I object to having such lovely company in this lovely rain we seem to be having?”
Bess smiled and pulled out a chair. Southern hospitality was about to meet Midwestern friendliness.
“Are you, by chance, Dr. Gilbert Buford?”
“That I am miss--?”
“Marvin. Do you know a Dr. Bruno Bolet? He passed away recently”.
“Of course I know him. He was my friend, not to mention my patient. Whole of New Orleans knows about the Bolets”.
“Right,” Bess started on her food. “I was wondering if you could tell me a bit about him?”
“Now why would you want to know about Dr. Bolet? You look to young to be spending time with an old coot like him”. Gilbert lowered his newspaper and looked thoroughly at Bess. He’d never see her around Bruno. The only young person Bruno kept around him was that curio shop owner Lamont.
“Dr. Bolet was you friend right? I was wondering if you could tell me a bit about him. What was he like? How did he die?”
“I would prefer a topic of a happier nature, but I do not want to be inhospitable,” Dr. Buford hesitated.
Score one for hospitality!
“I was Bruno’s friend, however, I cannot say he was mine”.
“Oh? Why so?”
“Fact is, while socializing with my fellow people, such as you, give me happiness, it did the opposite for Bruno. He was an eccentric man, an acquired taste. And the older he got, the less he seemed to care about how his idiosyncrasies negatively affected others”.
“What do you mean?”
“Well, take his nephew for one thing. Never talked to him. Never even talked to me about him. Never talked about his family. He wasn’t an egoist, but some might take it that way.”
“Did his idiosyncrasies ever bother you?”
Dr. Buford hesitated before responding. “There were times when Bruno was plain ridiculous. But, how should I put this?” Dr. Buford rubbed his hand on his chin in thought, “A mad scientist has sound reasoning and end result, even if it’s strange and abnormal to the rest of us”.
So it’s a matter of perspective? After his statement, Gilbert looked out into the rain for a while and Bess had to wonder how personal his last statement was. If Dr. Bolet wasn’t Dr. Buford’s friend, why did he react like so?
“For such an eccentric man, surely only an eccentric death suffices?” Bess quipped, hoping it would draw Dr. Buford back into the conversation. The old man turned and smiled, the orange light warmed his dark skin. He looked haggard and it struck Bess that Dr. Bolet died not too long ago. Grief acted in mysterious ways.
In an old professional voice, Dr. Buford answered, “He died of myocardial infraction likely caused by age-old atherosclerosis”. He then laughed at Bess’s confused expression. In all his years of study, he never understood why doctors gave such long complicated names to diseases when simple names existed. He once asked Bruno this as a jest, but the dentist spurred up with such vigor, declaring the whole medical industry as a farce. Everybody stared at them with the outburst and Gilbert asked himself again why he hung out with Bruno when the man did nothing but embarrass him.
“He died of a heart attack,” Gilbert clarified. “All too common with old age and with people who are socially isolated. “Apparently, the Bolet family has a history of heart attacks in old age, though none of them were health related”.
“So they were all fit as a fiddle, then one day, boom?” Bess asked.
Dr. Buford nodded. “Odd one, that family. But then again, this is New Orleans. Here the abnormal is normal, for those of us who are really in it, that is”.
Bess waited for the man to explain what he meant, but Dr. Buford did not elaborate.
“Funny thing was,” he said, “Bruno wasn’t always so recluse. Sure he was more reserved than others. The whole Bolet family was, but Bruno—well, after his brother’s death, something in him just broke, I guess”.
“How do they know it was a heart attack? Did they do an autopsy?”
Dr. Buford shook his head. “No. Given Bruno’s age, his family history, and the absence of foul play, an autopsy was declared unnecessary. His body was cremated as per his wishes. Funny thing is, he was the only member of his family to want a cremation”.
“Who decided to not do the autopsy?”
“Why, me. I was there when Bruno died. Saw it happen”.
“What happened?” Bess urged forgetting about her food.
“Well, I hadn’t seen him for a while so I went to visit him. When I arrived, the door was unlocked, as usual. I opened it and saw Bruno lying on the floor in obvious distress. Next thing I know, his housekeeper comes running up and just stared in shock. I sent her to call the ambulance. Then I—“.
Gilbert paused and thought over what he was going to say next.
“Well, I bent down and saw he wasn’t breathing. I pulled him away from the door and began to do chest compressions. I kept doing it till the medics arrived but nothing they did made a difference”.
“And Dr. Bolet was unconscious the whole time?”
“Yes,” Gilbert sighed. “Yes he was. One mercy I suppose”.
“You said you came to meet him, why then was he at the front door?”
Dr. Buford stared oddly at Bess. “You ask a lot of questions. You a reporter or something?”
“You guessed it sir. I am a reporter. Given that this is the Bolet family, it’s only natural everyone wants to know what happened in all the details”.
“Well, I don’t know if it’s any of the public’s business, but I suppose I could tell you. You’ve been nicer than the other reporters”.
Score one for friendliness!
Dr. Buford looked up and thought over Bess’s question. “Wait a minute. Why, yes—he was holding something. A piece of paper. And on the floor was an envelope”. Dr. Buford turned sharply at Bess, eyes widening in realization. “He must’ve collapsed after reading that letter!”
“Do you remember anything else?” Bess asked, leaning towards Dr. Buford. The story was finally getting good.
Dr. Buford chuckled. “Miss reporter, it’s quite a miracle I’ve remembered this much”. But the man still thought hard. “The odd thing is the letter. It was no longer in Bruno’s hand when the paramedics arrived. He might have let go when I moved him, but then it would have been lying around nearby and I did not see any paper around the area”.
Dr. Buford pressed his fingertips together as he went through his memories. Then, it dawned on him and he let out a grin.
“Iggy”.
“Iggy?”
“Bruno’s pet iguana. Bruno let all pets roam around the house freely. Iggy soon developed an irritating habit of stealing paper and stockpiling it in the vent system. I can’t recall how many times his housekeeper would call, asking for another copy of the medication because Bruno brought it home and left it on the table for Iggy to snatch up. Iggy must have taken the paper that day”.
“Did you see Iggy that day?”
“No,” Gilbert confessed. “But Bruno told me he was training Iggy to retrieve the things he’d stolen”.
“Dr. Buford,” Bess waited a moment before going forth with her question. “Do you think it’s possible that the housekeeper caused Dr. Bolet’s death? Maybe anger or vengeance or greed? Maybe she horded his pills and gave it all at once or something?”
“Young lady,” Gilbert exclaimed. “Are you insinuating that Bruno was murdered? I know you reporters need a good catch scoop, but possible murder is pushing the limits! And besides, if Bruno’d died from an overdose, he would have looked and reacted differently. No,” Dr. Buford hit the table with his hand. “I am certain it was a heart attack”.
Why is he so adamant?
“However,” Dr. Buford added as an afterthought. “I know Renee is deeply involved with the practice of hoodoo. As Bruno’s housekeeper, she had perfect opportunity to use it against my poor old friend”.
“Surely you jest! Hoodoo works?” Bess laughed.
“Miss reporter, one thing you should take to heart in your career is to never ever underestimate the power of suggestion. If a person believes something, even on a subconscious level, fantasy can easily become fact. Who knows what rubbish Renee filled Bruno’s head with. Drink this, don’t eat that, this brings good luck, that brings bad luck. Day in, day out—even if he didn’t believe in the stuff, who knows how much his subconscious was absorbing. Remember he was very old, very isolated, very lonely. He was a vulnerable man”.
“So it is possible that Renee could have caused Dr. Bolet’s heart attack?”
“Now don’t quote me on this because I still say it was not murder, but yes, she very well could have”.
So he doesn’t have a good opinion of Renee. I wonder why? Bess thanked Dr. Buford and hurried back to her hotel. Once inside, she called Nancy and conveyed what she had learned.
Nancy woke up to crows cawing at each other. For a sweet moment she relished going back to sleep. The bed and pillows were very soft and Nancy was not ready to take on the day yet. Then her body woke her up to her position. One leg was half off the bed, numb. One hand was holding onto her phone. Her notebook was lying open and her pen left an ink stain on the paper. Her arms were splayed out and her back was aching. Slowly she lifted herself up and her bed head came tumbling forward. Her eyes slowly closed but the caws opened them back up. Nature was in no mood to let her sleep.
Nancy recalled her conversation last night. Bess was right in her assumption that Dr. Buford seemed way too quick to make a diagnosis. Then again, he was a doctor. But he provided Nancy with a better understanding of that envelope. Now she was sure that Dr. Bolet was reading a letter from Milo Research and Technology, and Nancy had a hunch it was to do with the whisperer skull. She told Bess about Henry and his illegal sale, and what she learned about the crystal skulls and Bruno Bolet. Bess was silent for a moment, then in a worried voice, asked Nancy if she knew what she was getting herself into.
“Nance, this really sounds like a cult,” Bess remarked, and Nancy had to agree. There was too much hush-hush and a desire to put the past behind. Given how much everyone gained from Dr. Bolet’s death, it seemed like everyone would have a financial motive. Nancy even wondered if Dr. Buford and Renee were working together, but that seemed too cheesy. Not to mention, Bess said that Dr. Bolet did not seem to like Renee. I wonder if she feels the same?
But for now, Nancy had more pressing concerns. Iggy. She had to get Iggy to give that paper. Correction, I have to get Henry to get Iggy to give that paper. He seemed distressed when she bumped into him last night, but said nothing. Wonder if those ghosts came after all. She still could not believe that the supernatural existed. It seemed too ridiculous, but then the mystery was still young, and Henry said he felt nothing, so maybe the ghost thing was just a hoax. Nancy glanced at her phone and her eyes widened. It was nearing noon. She had slept late, but she was usually always an early riser. She quickly got out of bed and hurried to get ready.
When Nancy came into the kitchen, she was surprised to see Henry sitting at the kitchen table, nursing a cup to his head. He glanced up when she arrived, nodded at her, and went back to nursing his head. If Nancy didn’t know better, she would have assumed Henry had a hangover, but it seemed that both of them were beginning their day late.
“Did you eat yet?” Nancy asked. Henry shook his head. Guessing it must be too early for a meal, Nancy opted for toast and butter. She popped the toast into the toaster, and then buttered them heavily. She then poured herself a cup of tea and joined Henry at the table, giving him his plate. Henry seemed surprised at the gesture and mumbled a thanks. They ate in silence. Once the first toast and half the tea went down, Nancy felt invigorated to start her day. She turned towards Henry and started to talk.
“Got a task for you today”.
“Oh? The great detective need my help?”
“Yes, you should be so honored. I’m usually figuring things out myself”.
Henry laughed softly then asked what she needed.
“I need you to find Iggy and see if you can find where he stores the paper he steals”. Nancy pulled out the envelope. “We need to know what letter this envelope carried because your uncle was reading it on the night he died”.
“How do you know that?”
“Bess talked to Dr. Buford. Here,” Nancy showed Henry Bess’s number. She also gave him her number. You can call her if you want to know more about their conversation. Also, if you have any questions for Dr. Buford yourself. Henry took out his phone. He noticed there were two unread messages but ignored them for now. Instead, he quickly added Bess’s name to his contacts.
“Thanks. What else did she say?” he asked.
“Well Bess and I both think that Dr. Buford is trying to hide something. Bess also mentioned that Dr. Buford does not like Renee”.
“And how does Renee feel about Dr. Buford?”
“That’s what I’m going to figure out today”.
They finished their food and Henry took the plates and washed them. This time, Nancy helped to dry them and place them away. Henry then went to Bruno’s study while Nancy slipped out to the garden. Renee was in her usual spot, tending to her plants.
“Hello,” Nancy called out.
Slowly, Renee put down her garden tool and turned to face Nancy. She gave a nod but did not smile.
“Hello dear. Did you eat the rice and beans I left out for you?”
“Oh,” Nancy faltered. “No, I didn’t”.
“Oh”. Renee turned down towards her plants.
“I was wondering if I could ask you some questions?”
“Some more questions?”
“Yes”.
Renee sighed and nodded.
“What’s your opinion of Dr. Buford?”
Renee seemed surprised by Nancy’s question but did not hesitate to answer.
“Dr. Buford is a fine doctor. Treated Dr. Bolet well”.
“So you have no suspicions of his practice?”
“Dear girl,” Renee exclaimed with a laugh. “Why would I have any suspicions of Dr. Buford?”
Nancy took a shot. “Do you think he might be the skeleton man?”
Renee sputtered and Nancy continued.
“You mentioned that you saw the skeleton man too, right? Well from what I’ve learned, it seems that Dr. Buford was the only person who regularly meet with Dr. Bolet. So, it’s likely the skeleton man was him”.
Renee was quiet for a moment, then she said in a low voice, “I don’t know”.
Nancy tried another question.
“Your room, it’s, it’s got markings on the wall. What are they?”
“They are what keeps that dark being away from my room”.
“Dark being?”
“Those voices, they call to me at night. Can’t stand it. So I put those signs on the wall to send those spirits away”.
“Did it work?”
“Oh yes,” Renee gave a pleased smile. “They vanished the day I put them up”.
Nancy hesitated with her next question. “Dr. Buford doesn’t seem to like your practice in hoodoo. Has he ever told you that?”.
“Oh my dear,” Renee sighed. “The world is too complex for this question to have a direct answer. If I said I didn’t believe, then why do I participate in hoodoo? If I do, then everyone is ready to prove me wrong. But, my experiences are mine. I know there is something unnatural about our world. It doesn’t need a name, but if you want to give it a name, give it”.
Nancy groaned internally. In all of her mysteries so far, there was always some logical reason, something that would give way to some sort of explanation of unnatural causes. And yet, she knew that Renee was right. The atmosphere in the San Francisco house, the Mayan museum, Malone’s speakeasy, Camille’s sparks, they all exuded a presence of something beyond the fabricated ghosts, but she never bothered to investigate beyond the mystery. Now it was coming back to bite her. Then, Nancy realized a crucial question.
“Renee, where did you get that doll from? The one on your chair? I’ve seen it before, but only in a remastered train meant to look like something from the eighteen-hundreds”.
“Oh, that old thing? I just found it in a curio shop?”
“Which one?”
“The one where that young man who came over to visit Dr. Bolet works. What was it now?”
“Zeke’s?” Nancy asked.
“Yes! That one. He sells all sorts of antiques. Many of which decorate the manor”.
Nancy thanked Renee then went to find Henry. He wasn’t in the study, so Nancy went up to the secret room and saw Henry standing in front of the open vent, arms crossed. He turned, and when he saw Nancy, he beckoned her towards him.
“Iggy likes to hang out in Bruno’s study. Lots of paper to steal. So I watched him to see where he went. He went into the duct and I remembered this one was open, so I headed up here but he hasn’t come yet”.
Henry turned towards Nancy. “What did you find out?”
“Well, Renee has a good opinion of Dr. Buford. She doesn’t know he is the skeleton man”.
Henry sighed. “So we know nothing new”. He looked towards the vent. “I can’t believe we’re depending on a lizard”.
“Wouldn’t be the first time I’ve relied on lizards,” Nancy said as she snickered. She moved towards the pirate marionette doll. It reminded her so much of the doll in Renee’s room, but the pirate theme screamed Bruno’s jolly roger club. It even had an eyepatch over the left eye.
“Hey, Henry, what eye was the glass eye?”
“Left eye”.
Nancy then noticed that the doll was holding some box with buttons, and each button had a word under it. Bah? Moo? Boo? They were the same words in the hoodoo book Renee had! Quickly she brought out her notebook and pressed the buttons in the order she wrote down. There was another button labelled ‘talk’ which Nancy pressed. Suddenly the doll whirred to life, blinked it blue eye and repeated the words in a low robotic voice. The voice attracted Henry’s attention who snapped his head towards the sound. When the doll finished, it’s eyeball fell out. Nancy caught it quickly and noticed a piece of paper inside the eye. Carefully she pulled it out and opened it.
It’s time to learn about the Bolet family Henry.
Follow the clues to learn about each member.
Learn their roles and duties.
Recognize your own.
Recognizing the scrawl as Bruno’s hand, Nancy continued to read and found that Bruno had created another scavenger hunt for Henry. The first clue was to go to the last denizen buried on Bruno’s guard. There were subsequent clues, but they did not make any sense and Nancy guessed that whatever they would find would make the next clue make sense.
She went over to Henry and silently handed him the letter and the eye. Henry read it quickly and shook his head.
“There’s eccentric, and then there’s uncle Bruno. Come on, Iggy’s not coming. Might as well do something else”.
“Maybe we should give him food? The smell might attract him”.
Henry agreed, then added, “But it can’t be anything that will rot easily. I don’t want ants”.
Nancy rolled her eyes and jabbed her elbow into Henry. “Such a clean freak”.
After a moment, Henry jabbed her back, hesitated, then said, “What can I say, I’m an accountant. I like everything to be organized neatly”.
They came out through Henry’s room and collided into Renee. She looked at them and her eyebrows raised a bit as if she were amused. There was an awkward silence and Nancy, hurried to fill it in.
“Uh, Renee. Can I ask you something?”
“Again?” Renee quirked.
“Um, yes. That box in your room. The one with blue circles on it. Is it yours?”
“No. Dr. Bolet gave it to me”.
Nancy nodded then hurried after Henry down the stairs. As they descended, Renee called out to them.
“It’s raining again. Would you like the beans and rice for dinner? It’s good on a rainy day”.
“Anything’s fine Renee,” Henry said.
“Very well”.
Renee went into her room and shut the door. Nancy and Henry looked at one another and Henry just shrugged and went towards the living room.
“Should we give Iggy the rice and beans?” Nancy asked.
“I don’t need a gassy iguana”.
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Three Wishes Institute: New Locations part 2
I realized I forgot a few locations in my last post about new locations, so I decided to write out the rest here! Under Read more for Length
Crystal Woods:
The crystal woods is a beautiful place, so much so that beautiful seems like a lacking term. The area is full of crystalized trees and nature, yet it’s all entirely organic and the animals who live in the woods have adapted to the environment, eating crystalized foot or grass like it is nothing. Some animals even have crystals growing off of them - it’s an entirely strange and beautiful phenomenon that modern science is still trying to explain.
The woods might be out of the way from a lot of places (the closest city being around two hours away), but it’s not a tourist trap or even a place people visit often. There are people who come to research, people who come to buy land, but they’re all eventually turned away by the residence. The people here are almost all dwarves or descendants of dwarves, and take pride in the land they stand on. There is also a mine, like in the old stories about dwarves serving a princess, and a lot of the residence work there on a normal basis.
It’s a hub of history and tradition, and thanks to modern technology some people have gotten together to properly document all about their land and it’s history - they don’t mind it they simply didn’t want outsiders to do it, not trusting them to really understand or take everything they talk about seriously.
They do however allow new people to move in if they intend to work in the mine or on the fields to pick and sell crystalized crops (this is their major trade item with other cities / countries, and how the town has reminded in good shape for so long). Though it’s rumored that there is an...extensive interview process.
Emil and Otto are from here, and are one of the bigger families within the small town. Not just from the fact that have a lot of younger siblings, but the fact they have a lot of extended family as well. Most of which, are still pure blooded dwarves, while the twins themselves and most of their siblings are only a quarter dwarf, only having pointed ears to show for it.
Thieves Den:
The thieves den is located in a canyon, where ‘houses’ are carved into the side of the canyon wall. If it wasn’t filled with the worst people imaginable, It could be a popular tourist or vacation spot. Sadly, that is not the case. The people who live here are the worst of the worst, stealing from anyone or anything - sometimes even eachother, which starts brawls that could last all night. While they all sort of agree to follow one ‘king’ or ‘queen’ of thieves, there is no honor here, at the end of the day it’s every thief for themselves.
Still, the way they have crafted the homes in the canyon walls is both beautiful and functional. Magic and minor electricity keeps the place let up and functioning with the basics, rooms are filled with gold and other treasures gather Instead of doors there’s normally walls of beads and jewels, or expensive looking fabrics and tapestry that close off areas.
No one from the land of hot sands goes near the Thieves Den, lest they rob you blind and not even leave you with the clothes on your back. Some people from the slums seek refuge here if they have been kicked out for their ‘bad behavior’ and have no where else to go. Sometimes criminals are thrown in here by the guards of the surrounding cities as punishment for their crimes - either those criminals end up joining the den, or they aren’t heard from again.
There are two people who have connections to the den that are correctly At three wishes. One of them is unaware of the other, but the other is all too familiar with the former and occasionally tries to offer advice that only a thief could...
Sand Dune Slums:
A place that is exactly how it is described - a slum area within the Land of Hot Sands. It’s technically in the shadow of the major city (Modern Agrabah, cause idk what else they would call it honestly), so another name for the location is Agrabah’s shadow. People here are sometimes former criminals that can’t get a paying job in the city thanks to their previous record, or just people who had tried to make it big in the city and gave up at some point, or simply those who can’t afford to live in the extravagant city. Their homes are built out of layers of tarp, wood, and stone blocks - and they have to build within a certain area or else the guards from the city get mad at them, saying they’re ‘ruining the scenery’ since the city is a popular tourist spot. This is why the slums are contained to the back side / shadows of the outer city walls.
There’s a bit of a barter system in place of money, as no one really has a decent amount, ad any they’re going to spend would be spent in the city getting better quality things if that could afford it. However there’s still thugs and lowlifes here who try to steal from others without bartering at all - they only get stopped half of the time - the guards tend to turn a blind eye towards crimes that happen in the slums, focusing more on if any of the population of the slums makes trouble within the city, or throwing people out too the slums.
But, overall, the people here are pretty kind and try to welcome everyone with open arms. There’s lots of community events to keep people’s spirits up and they try to share what they get with anyone they can afford to.
Ozan is originally from here, but after stealing one too many things, he was thrown out of both the city and the slums. Left where no where else to go (other than the thieves den, but they wanted to avoid that place at all costs aswell), they wandered until they found a mirror to transport them somewhere else for them to live - which is how he came to steal items from Three Wishes Institute, and later be accepted into the headmaster’s family.
Underland:
(a big thanks to my friend Freya @twstriddle who let me use this idea that they had come up with and make a few tweaks to).
Underland is the organized crime capital of Twisted Wonderland. It is not a place you ever want to be caught in if you don’t know the unspoken rules of the place. Crime happens 24/7 here, you can barely take a look around without catching at least 3 crimes going on around you.
Having mostly been a dumping ground for the Country of Roses in the distant past, the city itself isn’t too modernized but instead has a more steam based system. This is someone’s Steampunk paradise on the surface; clock towers, exposed machinery with running gears all day and night, Crazy new inventions being made - and thrown out - every single day. Steampunk fashion is also popular and the most sold (legal) items in the city.
Among the crime families, there is one that practically rules over them all, the Pillars. They practically have a monopoly over most of what comes in and out of the city. They maintain a decent, working relationship with the other families, but they are also the most targeted because of their status. (and funfact the leaders of the Pillars are two husbands. I would say I don’t make the rules, but I very much do in this scenario).
Some say that there has been an uproar in Underland ever since someone stole items from the Pillars and disappeared without a trace.
Chronos Gate:
A stretch of land between the Country of Roses and Underland, which is a famous tourist destination. The land has been touched with time magic, now pretty much forbidden over all of Twisted Wonderland, and while efforts were made in the past to try and correct this area’s disrupted time, no success came of it and soon people founded it as a tourist destination instead.
Different areas of the land have different time zones and seasons, as time does not match up over all of the land. One step you’ll be in summer at noon, the next it might be a dark and cold winter night. The biggest attraction is at what is considered the ‘center’ of the land, time is completely stopped. A special walkway had to be made so that people wouldn’t get trapped here as they traveled through.
Each time one enters a different time, it’s considered walking through a ‘gate’ of time, hence the name of the location.
There are also research facilities set up in multiple areas of the land, studying the time magic and how to dispel it. There are people who live here aswell, but they tend to stick to the outer edges of the land - the ‘beginning’ and ‘end’ gates, the ones closest to Underland and the Country of Roses. These are the two gates that are the most accurate as far as time goes, even if they are a few hours ahead or behind the mentioned areas.
Someone in Three Wishes is very familiar how the Gates work.
Rosa Castletown:
A mysterious castle-town that only few have heard of, and even fewer been to. Apparently it used to be an entire country, but has been dwindled down to just the castle and the surrounding city - all enclosed within large stone walls.
Silas Rosamund is from here and often praises the castle town for persevering through the times, but also has slight criticism for the town as they have not all decided to keep up with the latest technology or trends. A lot of senior citizens move to the castle town because of this, wanting a nice and simple place to retire and relax. They have the basics at least, so at the very least they aren’t entirely in the stone age.
The castle town is said to be rolled by a beautiful and powerful queen, who only shows herself on special nights of the year. International holidays being a few but also a few holidays specific to the town, such as the rose viewing festival - as the castle town, if known by anyone, is known for their roses - they even have vines of roses encasing the walls of the town.
Silas actually lived in the castle as a servant, and tended to the Queen personally, so he’s one of the only ones who has ever seen her face up close.
#three wishes institute#twst fanschool#twst#twisted wonderland fanschool#twisted wonderland#fictional locations#twst ocs#[i mean technically?? my ocs are mentioned]
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I AM PROFESSIONALLY CONNED BY MY HUSBAND
A SELF PROCLAIMED GOOD GUY
Oo day, ang Ganda ko pero naloko ng pangit.
Pano ba nangyare? Ganito bhie, Mahaba ang kwento pero di kasinghaba ng titi ng asawa ko.
Year 2011, I met my husband in KSA. I am still young back then, and still madly inlove with my year LDR boyfriend. My husband courted me, even though he is aware I was in a relationship, he tried. He befriended me and since he proclaimed himself as a very good guy with some flaws in life, being a father of a teenage girl, so, I thought back then, OMG he was such an honest GUY. OO, naniwala ako, uto uto ang peg.
Then, my 7 year relationship ended. Chance nya na.. Grab the opportunity ginawa ng Lolo nyo. Brokenhearted, I gave my husband a chance. Brokenhearted, I made a choice to give in to him, sexually, in KSA (di ako malibog, nagtry Lang ang gaga, bilis nga, di ako nasiyahan.)
He proposed to me then on, not in a very romantic way as I would like to imagine. He just handed me the ring and just said the word, Marry Me. (Walang ka sweet sweet, kahit I sang langgam di malasahan and proposal kasi Walang tamis)
But I am so young back then,fresh pa ako bhie, and he is 11 years older than me, gurang na sya in short. Kinilig pa rin ako (or pinaniwala ko sarili ko siguro that time) , even though my heart sank hoping he would have proposed formally. We planned our wedding, but he is not that participative. Parang, o sya, planuhin MO lahat aatend Lang ako.
It is like I am marrying myself alone, but when it comes to meeting me, to have sex with me, I can feel the excitement he is showing me (wagas ang libog ng Lolo nyo) . His family never did the traditional pamamanhikan nor meeting my parents to pay respect for taking my hand in marriage. How ignorant of me in those times. I guess I am really blinded by the old guy. He just called my parents through phone and say, “Hello Nay, Tay, I would like to marry your daughter.” and conversation ended.
I felt the pain and hesitancy of my parents back then. Their anxiety and fear for me, their one and only princess, being taken by this middle age guy, a total stranger who never came to meet them. I am a fucking asshole. My family ignored those facts and questions in their mind. They love me, and they saw the excitement and happiness that I am getting married. (I am so lucky with my parents)
As months has passed, I started doubting myself to get married to him, I noticed some flaws. I started to feel being used as a trophy girlfriend, a sexual object. Parausan Lang feel gurl??? I was ready to end our relationship, and the unfortunate event happened. Our affair has been reported by our fellow Filipino colleagues. I was so scared and helpless, afraid of getting jailed and deported. I am not ready to become a young jobless woman. My siblings need me, financially to support their studies. I can’t afford seeing my siblings’ future taken away because of my stupidity. Gaga kasi, gurl. Yan ang napala ng pag explore.
So, I got married in an instant, in the Philippine Embassy of Riyadh. The place where Filipino couples getting married in a conservative, strict country like KSA. I got married in a rush, without the presence of my family.
Me… Alone…
And that’s how my husband had the chance to con me.
Pano ba? Sexually,.. Hmmmm…
He drained all the youth in me, wow.. Maka drain Lang eh no? Having me in bed almost every day and night, Kung pwede nya ako chukchakin ng 5 beses, ay gagawin nya.. Nakuha nya kasi ambata eh.
I am not sexually accomplished, but I pretended to be. He is harsh at times, he wanted to see how I react. His foreplays are rough. And I want it to end, so I did my role of being sexually in to it.
I dreamed to be a good wife. A wife that will fulfill my husband’s needs, physically, sexually, emotionally, even financially.
I wanted to become a mother as well, so we got pregnant in one try. I thought he will become a caring husband, an excited father to be thought it is not his first time. But, in the first check up I had, he
chose to spend his time with his so called friends rather than assisting me and be with me in my first ultrasound.
I was hurt. I never expected that. Mabait sya, my mind says.
Months has passed, my pregnancy is very much stable. Still working tough even on my 38th week. Malakas to, bhie..
In those months together, he was insisting on taking bank loans. I am hesistant. I am not the type of person who likes to have UTANG because I want my salary complete. However, he had me say Yes. I took a loan and it was approved because my salary is high enough to meet their required scale.
Just like that, when I received the loan, he took charge of it. Sent the money to his parents, telling me they will starts to build a house for us in their place. Since I believed their words, I just went on with the flow, not knowing his father is taking a Chunk of money as well to gamble.
I was able to deliver my first child normally. I was such a happy proud mother. He is as well but since having a child in KSA is difficult without having someone to take care of my son. We have to sacrifice and send our son home to the Philippines. It was my first, greatest heartache and it will always be until now.
I tried to be strong for my child’s future and my husband is giving 500 riyals share for my son monthly out of the 4000 riyals he is receiving from his salary, while I share 2000 riyals, Mas Madatung ako eh.. I did not bother to ask for more not unless it is my son’s birthday or it is Christmas time. Di ako demanding, Promise. Because I tried to understand his situation that he has another child to feed and my salary is higher.
The loan I took, I am paying 2/3 of it monthly, while he shares 1/3 of it. Trying hard ako maging perpekto ng asawa.
Every vacation we will divide our weeks from my place to his place.
Nevertheless, another ill fated event occurred. We had a fight in his place. And his father suddenly involved himself in our argument and threw us out from their place, in the house I spent my money with which his father gambled as well. Lakas ng loob Kaya sigawan kami, PUTANG INa LUMAYAS KAYO DITO!
Ako naman, e di layas. Masunuring Bata.
He let his father throw us out in the middle of the night. Yet, I am strong (though sa utak ko, tang Ina pigilan MO naman ako asawa ko, and my situation be like, ASA KA GURL).
So, I took my siblings with me and went to our relatives house. I could not fathom the fact that he let me wander in the middle of the night with my siblings. Parang, bahala ka kahit mamatay ka situation. Ganon.
Nonetheless, ignorant me. We patched things up, I could not let my child grow up with a broken family. And the same goes by. My life revolved with same routine. Giving money, covering my child’s expenses and I let it all happen. My mistake,maganda pero gaga naman.. I believed in him. Really. Sabi nya kasi mabait sya. With the pangako also to fix the ownership of our house. (Asa PA more, ne.)
And there it goes.
Years passed, I got employed by a better employer in Saudi, higher salary. And again, he convinced me with another loan. And I gave in, tanga Lang pero maganda. Yan nalang pakonswelo sa sarili, pagbigyan na. So, I gave half of my loan to my husband.
Then, I don’t know how cursed I am or him? His contract ended. Though there is a new employer willing to take him in. He refused. He said, he wanted to be with our son..
Ayyyy… natouch ako dun, gurl. So, I let him go back to Philippines, with investment plans, business plans and all even having a baby. Dami naming drawing, ay. Hanggang drawing Lang pala. Even, going home and taking care of our son, drawing din ay. Umasa ang Bata sa wala..
I did not oblige him to give monetary assistance to our son since July 2020 for the fact that, I wanted him to save the money he received from his severance pay in order to add up to our planned investments (planned talaga Yun, planado.. Planado nyang isugal at waldasin. )
Moreover, with cash assistance from me until he left to Philippines. Sugar mommy Lang.. Kagwapo ba? Hindi,
pangit po talaga asawa ko. Nabudol Lang talaga ako.
When he arrived in taguig, first 2 months he is okay. That even when, he even asked for 100k, nag pauto uli ang gaga, PAK! MONEY TRANSFER, automatic ako bhie.. He said everything is going according to plan. (according to plan pala Para magwaldas) until, the mid of December 2020, he started having mood shifts, parang lalaking nireregla, inaaway ako tapos aamu-in kasi gusto ng cybersex.
I tried to be more understanding, ang bait ko Kaya, because maybe because of LDR situation and the stress of pandemic. In spite of the mood swings, the indirect accusations and his possessive behaviors shows. From 2011 to 2020, of course, medyo kilala mo naman asawa mo e no.. From the eve of my birthday December 23, to the day of my birthday December 24, Pati pasko hang gang New Year. He was so fucking possessive that all I could do was to have a video call on him almost 24hours a day.
If he wants cybersex, I have to give in, I have to show my body and play with it. Pokpok na pakiramdam ko.. Medyo first class naman siguro.
Because if not, he will accuse me of having an affair. Speaking, he even says I have a man beside me and he hears the voices of the man. And me like, WHAAAAT??? My momo ba sa kwarto ko? And take note, he records our video calls.
Then early January 2021, I was surprised by a post of a stranger to my FB account on my son’s picture, accusing my husband, a theft, a con man, stating ‘that your husband namely BLAH BLAH Blah owes me a 100k and promised to pay me back but he did not, you’re a family of thieves and so on. ‘
Nawindang ako, bhie. Agad Agad, delete post, teng ene.. Sa picture pa ng gwapo Kong anak.
I confronted my husband, sya pa galit bhie and gradually, he admitted that he owes money to some people, and he cashed out all the money to his friends, and alcohols and gambling. BABAE? Meron ba?? Malay ko..
So, Nothing left. That’s when I thought, Kaya pala Kung ano ano akusasyon kasi sya mismo may kalokohang ginagawa. DEFENSE MECHANISM USED – PROJECTION
Again, supportive wife here (tanga Lang, day, wishing ba) I said, it’s okay, it’s only money and so on. And I gave almost 40k just to have an end and have him start again to apply for jobs. I gave him links and ads and places to apply back abroad. Pero, ASA PA MORE. Waley..
Despite of what happened, the endless fight, accusations pa more, and demanding for money did not end. The messages of people I don’t know kept coming-in in my messenger.
And my vacation day is here! I was very excited to be with him and make a baby. But fuck him, kahit sa eroplano iharap ko daw cp ko sa bawat taong katabi ko, gago sya. Para akong tangang inikot ang cp. And he was not satisfied at all, tagalan ko daw iharap ang cam.. E di wow, wag na.. Awayin nalang nya ako kesa ireklamo ako ng passengers.
And hello Philippines during pandemic, quarantined in a high standard hotel. And of course, my great husband wants to barge-in in my hotel, because sabi nya I have a a lalake in my room.. May nakikita daw at naririnig, and me be like, Saan banda sa kwarto yang nakikita MO? Like, I really wants to see and hear it as well.
Kaya, e di wow uli.. Ang lakas ko naman sa OWWA at coast guard Para bumali ng quarantine protocol..
I really tried.. I tried… and I tried… and I tried to fix our marriage… message after message of people I never knew and people I knew hoping I would be the one to pay the debts of my VERY GOOD HUSBAND, still surprises me. To the point that, Even looking at my messenger or FB gave me a phobia.
I am so helpless.. Like, sheeeet… anong nangyare gurl? Saan ako kakapit. And my husband even wants to take charge of my son’s bank.. But no way..! LIKE TAMA NA, ULOL.! LALABAN ANG INA!
BUT I REALLY Tried… nag effort ako… nagpakatanga ako.. Who wants a broken family for their child, right? Wala di ba? I tried to hide the flaws of our marriage from our son. I cried secretly, I hid the phone away when his father starts to shout at me. But you see, my son is smarter than me. He saw my tears, my
sadness. He caught his father shouting at me at times via videocall. Huli sa akto ni bulilit. Pero di ko Alam.
My vacation ended with a failure to have a complete family bonding but accomplished mother and son bonding. I tried to fulfill my son’s needs with my existence alone.
And hello me ngayon… nganga…
Still lost… basag na basag… I tried to fix myself up… I have to, for my son’s future, I may not be accomplished with my marriage life, but thankfully God blessed my career as a Frontliner. My son’s has no one now but me.
My husband still asks for money. I changed my FB name to Korean characters. I unfriended my husband to avoid those people he owes some money and people sending me, KAWAWA AKO KASI NILOKO AKO.
Tama na uy. Masakit. Sobrang sakit.. Tao po ako… animal ang ugali pero Hindi bato..
But I am hiding all my tears and wounds from the people surrounding me even though they knew, ginago ako ng asawa ko. They did not bother to ask, they respect my silence and I thanked them for that.
But in reality, I don’t know what to do. I felt stuck in a quicksand, slowly drowning in sorrows, sadness and frustrations. I was left behind, drowning. Tortured with this unexplained pain and agony.
I am conned by my husband.
I spent money on a house which will never be mine.
I spent money which will never come back to me..
I was left, zero….
And I don’t know what to do…
How can I help myself…
When I don’t even know if our law can protect me and my child..
It is me and my child…
Against a MAN who is supposed to be our protection but rather, the Man who thinks nothing but himself, he himself is a danger to me and my son.
His delusions and hallucinations still continues. Baka may third eye asawa ko???? I don’t know.
His unending hurtful messages kept pouring in. Even a recorded sound of the bed na yumuyogyog, he will send it to me.
His unending demands of money.
Like wow, bat di sya magtrabaho….
Sugar mommy ako??? Ako??? Gandang sugar mommy mo naman, bhie…
I just wished….
I just hoped…
The government will someday established a law for the wives who has been conned financially by their own husbands. May VAWC, PAO, PCW, et cetera but how come it is near yet so far….
I just don’t know the proper law to fight against him…
I can’t annul him, it’s too expensive.. Hanggang sa patayin nya nalang siguro ako..
Legal separation? OMG, how about the house.. In short, sya nag enjoy sa bahay na dugo at pawis Kong pinundar.
Our son? How can I demand monetary assistance when he is jobless…
I asked legally, and nothing happened..
It only benefits him, not me and my son…
Kaya wow.. Hanggang sa mamatay o mapatay nya ako ay..
Our Family Court aspires to fix marriages as much as possible, and it is good..
But does it means, wag maghiwalay, magpaabuso ka Hanggang sa mamatay.
(sighed)
So, here I am…
What I am now? You can say,
I am a wife, sexually and physically used by my husband according to his own time of desires and needs.
I am a wife, who is financially and emotionally, mentally abused by my husband.
I am a wife PROFESSIONALLY CONNED BY MY HUSBAND BEFORE HE CONNED OTHER PEOPLE..
I am his long term conned victim.
#VAWC#violence against women#stop the pain#women power#you are good enough#you are beautiful#women rights#you are loved#loveyourself#tumblog#tumblr
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I love your love – untie it, entwine it (A KoiTsudu Fanfic)
Genre: Angst, Romance, Fluff, Smut... but mostly smut... I counted the pages, yes, I know the percentage
*** *** ***
It bugged him that she didn’t know how much he wanted her.
Or rather, she knew… to an extent.
They’ve been married for five months now, Nanase knew he had healthy sexual drive towards her… It’s just… she never grasped just how MUCH and how OFTEN he wanted her! His little soft wife, the most positive person he ever knew, who believed the best in the worst of people, who believed in herself professionally more and more each day – somehow, she’d managed to bypass building her self-esteem as a woman completely! In her world, Kairi was a god living on a pedestal of light and love, and she wasn’t worthy of him. In any way, shape or form. Especially, form.
*** *** ***
He hated that part of himself so much! That part that didn’t know how to communicate this powerful, all-consuming need to have her, and hold her, and protect her and make her happy! Words! He needed words and the ones he had would always end up stuck in his throat or come out twisted. Nanase would startle, her eyes wide with worry, apologize in a deep respectful bow and get very quiet for a while. And he could almost see how she’d make yet another note in her mental notebook called ‘How not to upset my perfect husband, Volume 7 out of XX’.
Kairi Tendo, brilliant cardio surgeon, all around smart guy, was so dumb when it mattered the most! He vowed to himself so many times to hold his temper, to leash his arrogance and treat her better than that… but it was so damn hard! That stupid advice from long ago – to let life and work mix up and enjoy the chaos – was finally bringing results and not the ones he’d hoped for! Nanase was his wife, the most precious person whose smile and kind heart was vital to his survival – and yet she was also his nurse, quite promising and quickly improving specialist who cared too much, meddled enough, sometimes stood in the way and ever so rarely made mistakes. Teaching her, even reprimanding her, was a part of his job. And his personality was well suited for this, for being brutally honest and quick to judge. But Kairi couldn’t shake off the feeling that the same way Nanase brought her love and care for him to work – he’d bring his ‘sensei mode’ back home.
*** *** ***
He yelled at her this morning. She was taking off the night shift, he was taking on the day shift, they’d cross paths only for her to update him and his day nurse on couple of critical post-op patients they had in the ICU. She’d stumbled with couple of overly-scientific words, took few moments too long to find the blood work results – and before he could catch himself, the devil in him called Tendo Nanase stupid. Out loud. In front of people. For real, this time.
She flinched, bowed, finished her report quickly and left. Without raising her eyes to him. And it hurt so much! And the fact that Nanase avoided his eyes because she believed to have disappointed him hurt that much more!
He was a demon indeed! Now he understood! Vile creature redeemed only by the fact that he had an angel for a wife… Whatever has he done in his previous lives to deserve her? Because Kairi was confident he did nothing significant enough to deserve her in this one! Or, alternatively, what could she possibly have done to deserve him as a punishment? Probably, not the case – Nanase was too bright of a soul to work off any past sins. She was light. And he was the monster.
*** *** ***
At lunch hour, the nurse brought in a package. With his lunch box and a note from his wife. ‘Hope you’ll like this omurice, sensei. I promise to strive to be a better nurse… and a better cook. Remember to take care of yourself as you are very important to your patients and to me. Love, Nanase’. She’d also doodled little hearts and a smiling kitten. His ever-so-positive wife was trying to cheer him up.
Omurice was ok, but considering Tendo didn’t have breakfast this morning, it was amazing! While chewing on the chicken fried rice, he though absentmindedly that Nanase didn’t know how to cook omurice not so long ago. She must’ve added it to the long list of things she needed to learn in order ‘to be a better wife’ after he’d complimented the omurice they had at the restaurant this weekend. His wife would spend every waking moment free of studying or cleaning on googling recipes – for whatever reason Nanase believed it was her wifely duty to keep their home tidy and her husband well fed. Or, rather, she believed these were the skills she could master enough. For the rest of her ‘wifely duties’ Nanase was genuinely and heartbreakingly grateful to Kairi for ‘settling’ and ‘accepting her inexperience, clumsiness and shyness’. And it bugged him to no end how utterly wrong she was in this particular aspect! Of all the things! THIS was not him ‘settling’ for her, THIS was what surprised him the most straight from the beginning, how it’d hit him like a truck and knocked the breath out of him and he still couldn’t make sense of how MUCH and how OFTEN he couldn’t see straight and function properly because his body was filled with the NEED for his wife!
*** *** ***
It wasn’t always like this for him. Kairi was never shy or anything but natural arrogance prevented him from developing deep enough connections for them to become physical – up until his university days. When you’re dealing with life and death on daily basis, things like ‘long-term’ and ‘waiting for the right time’ become less meaningful and less constricting. Sex becomes causality, something people do to relieve stress and have a bit of hormone rush. That is not to say Tendo Kairi was mundane about it – he took time and effort to become exceptional in it too, if not for anything other than being efficient and considerate of his partners.
But after Minori… he just didn’t care enough about life in general, other than lives of patients in his care. His physical excretion was dedicated to jogging and his hormones were forced to take a really long vacation.
Up until the point he’d met Sakura Nanase for the second time in his life.
Kairi couldn’t exactly pinpoint the moment when his general aversion to her antics turned into mild curiosity, then to soft appreciation and then, out of nowhere and all of a sudden, into majestic rainbow of feelings and emotions. And the least one Kairi expected was desire. Primitive, possessive, gut-wrenching lust for a little shy virgin with baby deer eyes and all the trust of the world shining in them! Nanase was so far away from his type that, as he ran towards her, his ‘type’ got lost behind the horizon and all that was left was her. Her forever-blushing cheeks, her soft hair, her clean scent… and his need to possess all of it, day and night, just him and always more!
*** *** ***
Tendo Kairi was a practical man and once he’d realized that his girlfriend, Sakura Nanase, was ‘it’ for him – he’d accepted it and moved on. He never argued with himself regarding his ‘type’ and ‘standards’, never looked for faults in her appearance or tried to compare her with anyone from his past. He was forever grateful to Nanase for waking him up and proving he wasn’t dead inside – and that included his male drive.
However, that awakening soon proven to be too much to handle for normally cold-blooded and composed doctor. His naïve and inexperienced girlfriend knew she drove him mad with her mishaps and quirks… but she had no idea she drove him up the wall with desire just by being present!
It was so hard when they’d started dating…
That first time he’d kissed her and felt his entire body respond to her closeness… and how he stood behind her door thinking of the reasons to come in and do more ‘medical treatment’ kisses all over her skin… but then… Nanase was so pure, so innocent, so shook with all the events of that day… and so he waited.
The time she got jealous of Miori and tried letting him go… and he wanted to kiss her tears away… lock her in his arms and dispel her worries with the heat building up in his body…
And then hotel room… Her innocent plea to be gentle for her first time… Kairi held his breath when he felt Nanase approaching him… he prayed fervently… for her to do something, ANYTHING, to give him an excuse to respond… but also for her to keep her distance because he wasn’t sure he could be gentle with so much fire burning inside of him. So, when Nanase wished him ‘good night’ and felt asleep immediately after, Tendo was somewhat relieved… and hugely disappointed. And the chaste kiss he gave her that night did nothing to quench his thirst… again.
These moments were piling up and up and up… Until one day, about a week after Sakura was discharged after her accident… they played Jenga.
*** *** ***
Jenga was supposed to be innocent enough game, something to keep Tendo focused on something else other than the girl beside him. That fresh-out-of-the-shower, wearing-loose-sweater-over-sports-bra girl with her hair still slightly wet and her skin still slightly flushed from hot water. She smelled of soap and happiness and that scent was making Kairi light-headed and heavy in the same time. The way she was biting her lower lip when she’d focused on her next move… the tilt of her head and dreamy expression when she was watching him… how was any of that not intentional, Tendo didn’t know!
Right before he was about to take out another risky block, Sakura tagged on her sweater to wipe out droplets of water rolling down her collarbones and sighted:
- I probably should dry my hair after all…
Kairi refocused his gaze on her fingers sliding across the collar of the sweater. He opened his lips to respond and realized his mouth was too dry to talk. Sakura’s palm traveled back to the back of her neck and she’d stretched, swaying a bit in her sitting position. She looked at him and asked:
- Sensei, please, wait till I’m back before you make your move, I need to see which one you took.
He nodded still not capable of coherent sounds. Nanase stood up and made half a step towards her bathroom when her knees buckled and she felt back down, landing inches away from him. She tried to break her fall by grabbing Tendo by the shirt but only ended up bumping their foreheads together. Sakura yelped and rubbed her forehead quickly, all while chattering her apologies:
- Ah, sensei, did I hurt you? I’m so sorry, my leg fell asleep and I stumbled and I..! I’m so clumsy, sensei, it was all my fault!
Her eyes were fixed on his forehead, assessing the damage she thought she’d caused. Sakura looked back into his eyes, her voice a little raspy with worry:
- Do you have a headache? Feel dizzy? Loosing focus in your vision?
Tendo noticed her eyes searching his face – his little nurse was assessing him for signs of brain trauma. He was about to make a comment that her head, no matter how hard, could not have damaged him that much… and then a memory crossed his mind. He did the same thing tree weeks ago… searched her eyes for pupils dilation, checked her pulse… she assured him she was fine back then… and he trusted her… and almost lost her…
Barely visible scar on her forehead will soon fade and be concealed by the hairline. She was back to work already and perfectly healthy. Yet, he couldn’t shake off the dread that broke into his chest and froze over his heart. He could have lost her. Not a single doctor in their hospital told him ‘It’s going to be ok’. Because he would know they were lying. And none of them was sure enough to tell him the truth. He could have lost her.
Stark contrast between cold spreading through his limbs and her warm presence so near him made Tendo shiver. Nanase noticed and took her fingers off his forehead:
- What is it, sensei? How can I help?
The sincerity, the plea in her voice, so gentle, so honest, so in love… broke the ice that was binding him. Tendo grabbed her by the waist and hugged her tight to his chest, making her straddle his thighs. Nanase stilled for a second and then instinctively tried to pull away, too embarrassed by this new closeness to male body. Kairi didn’t let go, instead borrowing his face into crook of her neck, inhaling deeply her sweet, pulsing scent. So intoxicating, so alive!
- Shh, Sakura, please…
The girl in his arms stopped struggling and he felt her feather-like touch hugging him around the waist. She whispered softly:
- Tell me, what do you need?
Kairi turned his head and planted soft kiss just behind her ear, eliciting half-sight, half-moan out of his beloved captive. He did it again, tracing kisses down her neck, feeling her chest rise and fall quickly as her breathing became quick and shallow. Sakura’s fingers clutched his shirt from behind, digging into his back and injecting his nerves with electricity and short-circuiting his muscles. Tendo clenched his teeth before he could bite the tender skin on her shoulder and said in barely audible voice:
- Please… just… please…
Sakura brought one of her hands and rested in between his shoulder blades, patting his back a little. That was probably supposed to be reassuring and calming motion but seeing how it flushed her body against his and she was still straddling his thighs – it was anything but! Nanase, still frustratingly oblivious to the storm she was wrecking with her innocent movements, asked him again:
- What? Sensei, did you say something?
Kairi straightened and caught her face in his palms, locking her eyes – her deep, baby-deer-big eyes – with his. There was no fear in them or discomfort – just trust and love, so, so much love! Kairi said in low steady voice, making sure she understood everything this time:
- Stay. With me. Tonight… be mine.
She knew what he’d meant. Tendo felt her body stiffened as Sakura stopped breathing and her eyes shot even bigger than before. Something flashed across her face, something shy and scared. Kairi kissed her cheek, then the other, feeling her small form relax into his embrace. Her eyes were still worried though, so he asked softly not to spook her:
- Do you… not want to?
It couldn’t be it, right? She tried to seduce him before, for God’s sake! But maybe… maybe it wasn’t the night? What if it wasn’t that ‘right time’ girls like her romanticized so much in their virgin dreams about Prince Charming? Or was it him… not being Prince Charming enough?
Nanase swallowed hard and Tendo’s heart stilled anticipating her answer:
- I don’t want to, - Sakura bowed her head, averting his gaze and Tendo felt his blood stopping in his veins, - …disappoint you.
Tidal wave of relief almost knocked Kairi over and all the tension that was holding him in place escaped with a groan. He grabbed Sakura by the shoulders and shook her a bit, making her look at him again. It was still there, the fear he saw in her eyes! But his shy virgin girlfriend wasn’t scared of him or being with him this way – she was scared of herself! Of her inexperience… and her disappointing him.
To be honest, Tendo never engaged with younger women before specifically for this reason – he didn’t want the responsibility of being ‘the first one’ because of all the expectations and all the awkwardness attached. But with Nanase… his fragile and strong sakura flower… he cherished the honor of being the first one! And passionately hoped for the privilege of being ‘the only one ever’ in the future to come! To have her give herself only to him, to find his home inside her body and soul, to have and to hold… his Nanase, only his, his first and only Nanase!
Containing so much desire and love was getting too much for Kairi and he began to tremble. He closed his eyes, listening to blood thundering and beating like a drum in his head – his body’s demand to do something, ANYTHING, before he combusted!
Only then he looked at Sakura, realizing he still hasn’t said anything to her confession. She was biting her lower lip and glancing back and forth between him and the floor, waiting for some sort of judgement on her adequacy. ‘Am I not… sexy enough?’, his memory supplied. Why?! Why, oh, why would she ever doubt it? Did she not feel his body burning underneath her? Did she not hear his blood singing under her fingertips? Did she not see the hunger in his eyes, the primal need to devour here and now?
No, she didn’t. On the back of his mind, Tendo registered a snarky remark that experienced nurse was supposed to know the tell-tale signs of male arousal – especially, since he was showing all of them at once – but the bigger and smarter part of his brain shushed the demon away and supplied the answer – she really didn’t know! She wasn’t his nurse right now – Nanase was his girlfriend, young inexperienced woman he loved so much and wanted so badly his bones hurt! It would take some time for her – and some considerable effort from him – to show her just how sexy she was to him and how there was absolutely no way she could displease him in any way!
Tendo said, his voice hoarse and strangled:
- Sakura… my, my Sakura! You can never, ever disappoint me!
- But… um… sensei…
Tendo pressed a finger to her lips, momentarily transfixed with sensing her wet mouth under his touch. He rushed into the kiss, possessing her with unreserved passion, swallowing her surprised moan. Nanase swayed – not away from him but into him – and circled his neck, locking them into the frenzied kiss for as long as they could survive without air. Her lips parted in sigh and Kairi took the opportunity to taste her, to caress her tongue with his, inviting Sakura to respond. Her first movement was unsure, even lost… but Sakura was nothing if not persistent and eager to learn! She took her cues from Tendo’s labored breathing, groans rumbling deep in his chest – and soon she’d danced the dance too, meeting Kairi half-way, touch for touch and kiss for kiss!
Tendo broke away first, heaving like crazy and willing himself to release her hair – he must’ve left bruises on her sculp with how tightly he held her. But then again, she didn’t complain… Would she complain if he caused her pain?
Tendo shook his head to chase away this ugly thought and looked at Nanase. Evening settled around them and her face was only lit by the dim light of a nightstand lamp. Even so, Tendo could see that Sakura was bright shade of red and trying to blow some cool air down her chest without him noticing. Oh, he noticed! And no matter how proud Kairi was to bring her to this state over a short period of time, he was not about to cause his girlfriend a heat stroke on their first night together!
Kairi proposed tenderly, almost shyly, tugging on the hem of her sweater:
- May I? Take this off, I mean…
He felt like he needed to add this little explanation as Nanase may think a whole range of things including him asking her to borrow the sweater. Tendo chose to be very specific about wanting to undress the woman in front of him and waited patiently for her to respond, still tagging on the sweater.
Nanase closed her eyes for a moment, her shoulders bunching in defensively… but when she’d opened them again, Tendo saw her determination to brace the challenge, as she nodded and raised her hands above her head. Kairi chuckled silently – his little hero was getting ready to be judged by him on the merits of her body and it probably took a lot to go for it like this – and he was more than ready to unwrap the gift he waited for since forever.
His hands dove under fabric to touch the warm skin. He started from the waistband of her sweatpants, palm tracing up the sides of her body, slowly, very slowly. Kairi tried to commit to memory the look on her face when he caressed her stomach with his thumbs… the way her eyes rolled a bit when he draw lines around the sides of her breasts… how Sakura leaned into him when he was tugging the sweater over her head… and then she was free. And he was doomed.
She was perfect. Sakura, his woman-to-be, was perfect. She wasn’t too thin, so no bones were sticking out anywhere – instead, soft curves of her belly immediately gave Tendo all kinds of biting fantasies and an urgent desire to mark her that way. Then he’d noticed she had a scar – just under the left collarbone – and Kairi made a mental mark to ask Nanase about it later. Her breasts, still clad in sports bra, were not too big and just the right size to fit into his palm – they teased him to check the fit right away with how they were dancing under his unblinking gaze and with Sakura’s nervous breathing. His hand twitched uncontrollably but stilled in the air. There was something he had to do before that… right? What was it?
Tendo looked at his hand suspended between them, looked at Sakura’s waiting face, noticed how she’d pressed her lips together as if trying to keep some words from spilling out – and it dawned on him. He exhaled, putting all the conviction and passion in his body into this answer to her unspoken question:
- You are so beautiful, Sakura. And you are so sexy, I am… it’s hard to breathe…
His hand came back to his body, clutching the front of his shirt, trying to untie the knot of nerves and anticipation tangled in his chest. He looked back at Sakura, trying to see whether she’d believed him earlier – but she was looking at his chest, her eyes squinted, as if considering something. When Sakura met his gaze again, Kairi raised an eyebrow questioningly – was she really checking for some another symptom regarding his problems with breathing? Now?!
Sakura surprised him by touching her fingers to the top button on his shirt:
- May I?
The problem with breathing may well kill him seeing how he’d stopped doing that altogether! Nanase… wanted to… undress him! Kairi nodded, both his hands falling to the floor beside him to ground in for the tornado spiraling around.
Sakura unbuttoned his short meticulously, practically, tugging a bit to get to the buttons hidden inside his suit pants. When the shirt finally split in the middle, she touched her right hand to Kairi’s throat, softly tracing the veins, the hollow, down the middle of his chest, circling the bellybutton – until she touched the belt buckle. Sakura followed the same path again, this time with both hands on his body, splaying her fingers wide to touch as much of him as she could. She didn’t go far for when her nails grazed his nipples, Tendo hissed and launched towards her. His vision was blurry, his body taught as a bow string – and his virgin seducer looked at him with almost scientific interest! Tendo licked her mouth and sucked in the lower lip, making Sakura dig her nails into his chest again. She whimpered in protest when Kairi released her but then he’d whispered into her lips:
- Do it again.
Sakura tried kissing him but Kairi leaned back. She caught him by the neck, and he resisted still. He wanted something of her – and Sakura gave in:
- Do what again?
Tendo unclenched her arms from around his neck and brought her hands to his chest. He leaned in, his lips brazing her shoulder, his voice low and needy:
- Nails… again… please…
Instead, Nanase pushed him back so she could look at him and he could look at her. She crooked her head as if thinking something over, her fingers flexing ever so lightly over his flamed-up skin. Sakura bent her head, her lips trembling, and kissed one of the red marks on his chest, making Tendo throw his head up and moan loudly. He forgot all about his previous plea – wet sloppy kisses worked too, yes, please, more!
Sakura kissed him again, and again, and again… Tendo’s fingers grabbed shabby carpet so tight his knuckles became white – he was trying so hard to control himself when all he wanted was to throw her down on the floor and consume her whole, make her fall apart under his body, claim her!
His control was running out and Sakura was not making it easy for him – her touches, her kisses, wet traces she left with careful licks of his skin were leaving invisible marks all over his chest, exquisitely pleasurable marks of her claim over him! Not able to hold off any longer, Tendo let go of the carpet – and was stopped midway by his lover’s uncertain voice:
- Will you… teach me?
Tendo shook his head to clear it up, looking incredulously at his amazing temptress – was she still doubting her ability to turn him on? He rushed to answer before Nanase took his gesture the wrong way:
- There’s only one rule to his game, Sakura. I’ll teach you… but you will also teach me, ok?
The look of surprise and confusion would’ve been comical… if Tendo could see past the fact that she was half-naked and in his arms. Nanase asked, focusing on her palm laying on his chest:
- What can I teach you? I don’t…
Tendo quickly bent his head to snatch the rest of whatever ridiculous statement she was about to make with a kiss. He said just as quickly to stop this line of self-doubt:
- Teach me about yourself, Nanase. If I do something you like – tell me. If I do something you don’t like – absolutely tell me, immediately! Promise me!
Nanase raised her head and looked at him. Not saying anything. Kairi pressed on:
- Sakura, please, promise me! I need to learn how to be with you so I can teach you how to be with me… Please…
And then Sakura smiled. And that wasn’t her shy smile, her humorous smile or even her happy smile. It was the one Tendo haven’t seen before… Sakura’s first woman’s smile. Mysterious and knowing and seductive as hell! If only she knew how much power she held over him!
Sakura said with a nod:
- I promise. And…
- And?
- Sensei, all the things we did earlier… I liked.
And that smile again. Kairi wondered if she was using it deliberately already, commanding spasms all over his frenzied body at will. If she knew, she was damn good at it! If she didn’t know – she was a natural!
Then Sakura did something unpredictable, yanking her bra off in one quick, practiced move and tossing it aside. Tendo bent in half as if from the gut punch and froze, his eyes fixated on her naked breasts perking up at him invitingly. His hands reached out automatically and stopped so close… so close he could feel magnetic pull of her flash on his fingertips, like static charge.
- May I? – he asked, his voice hopeful, pleading.
Sakura answered simply but with so much weight in her voice, leaning into his touch and closing the short distance:
- Yes, please…
That touch felt like a shot of strong alcohol, spreading liquid warmth from his fingers directly to his neither regions, making all the throbbing and tension in his pants even more painful and urgent. Tendo grinded his teeth, adamant to not let his primal male brain take over – but it was near impossibility with Sakura’s tender flash so close to him, so willing, so responsive! She arched into his palm, her head thrown back in a deep moan when his fingers squeezed her pebbled nipples and tugged a little. Her hands shot up and Sakura grabbed his shirt collar for leverage, making Kairi loose his balance and drop on top of her, pressing her to the floor. Nanase gasped when their bodies touched, feeling tingling sensation sparkling all over her skin. Tendo detached for just a second to yank off his shirt making Sakura whine at the lost of his intoxicating presence over her body. She reached out to him:
- Sensei…
Kairi came back, laying between her bent legs, cradling her head with one hand and searching all the soft and sensitive spots he could reach to with the other. He explored with abandonment, lost in his own world built of Sakura’s trembling and crushed whispering. Sometime through the haze of desires, each one more demanding that the other, he’s heard Sakura call out to him:
- Sensei…
He breathed out:
- Yes?
- Sensei… teach me…
She placed her hands over his shoulders and tentatively followed the outline of his back muscles, digging her nails in just a little, the way he liked it before. Tendo bit into her shoulder, buckling into her body and seeing sparks behind tightly shot eyelids. He growled:
- Sakura… later… I won’t… last.
She stilled underneath him, still holding him tight in her arms. Her felt her lips brush over his chest when Nanase whispered:
- Then… what? Do I…
- Trust me.
- Always.
Her answer was immediate even though he didn’t form it as a question. He would never ask her that for Kairi knew that his little brave angel trusted him unequivocally, beyond any doubt and reason. Still, this admission of her purest love for him made something shift in him, cooling him off in a good way, giving him enough clarity to hold on just a little longer.
Kairi licked over the bite mark on her shoulder, tracing down along her collarbone, kissing her openly and hungrily. Her breasts tasted so sweet, her cherry-stone nipples so sensitive under his tongue and fingers – Tendo drank in her cries, her hopeless pleas for more, and more, and more… The way she’d grabbed his hair and pulled down to bring his lips to her wanting body… The way her hips grinded against his erection making Tendo almost cry with pain and pleasure…
Kairi made his way down her body excruciatingly slow, making sure to taste every piece of it, savor every spasm and every incoherent sound she’d make, every convulsive tug of his hair… When he finally reached the waistband of her sweatpants, Tendo looked up at Nanase – her lips swollen, eyes hooded, her expression dazed. Before he could ask yet another ‘May I?’, Sakura raised her hips and let go of his hair, placing her hands of the floor for balance. Tendo worked her sweatpants together with her underwear off, not taking his eyes off her face, looking for any glimpse of fear or confusion. There weren’t any. Nanase looked at him with trust… and anticipation… and challenge… and that smile again.
Tendo’s nostrils flared. Predator in him, primal male creature, detected new scent, something to be hunted till the end of the Earth. He finally looked down, to the little arrow of dark-brown curls contrasting so fine with her pale skin. Her legs were slightly apart, just enough of an angle to see where this arrow was pointing to… little droplets of moisture glistening in the dim lights of the room. That was the scent. Her scent that was only for him!
Gods, have mercy on him! The need to taste her and drink her up battled with equally strong need to be inside her right now, to get lost in her, to never come back… need to conquer, to own, to mark! Sakura, his Sakura, only his!
Sakura… the saving thought dropped on him like a handful of snow… his needs would wait! Her needs were more important now… they were more important always.
Kairi touched his hand to the dark triangle, enjoying the soft feeling of tight damp curls under his fingers. He pressed with his thumb down in the middle and when Sakura’s hips jerked, Tendo knew he’d found what he was looking her. He circled the little nub of nerves, teasing her with pressure and then almost letting go. Sakura covered her mouth with her palm, trying to muffle screams reverberating through her body – but Kairi took it away, repositioning himself lay to the side of her, hoovering over her face, whispering his words into her trembling lips:
- Don’t, Nanase. Let me hear you.
Her circled her clitoris again, and again, flicked it – and Sakura moaned into his mouth:
- Sensei… inside…
With her right hand Nanase yanked him down into feverish, all-consuming kiss, threatening remnants of Kairi’s self-control. Her left hand pressed on the lower part of her belly, trying to squeeze out that nagging feeling of something burning inside of her. The feeling increased with every touch of Tendo’s smart fingers, every circle he made added another rotation on a spring winding deep in her body. That spring was connected to every nerve, every muscle, every thought and every emotion within her, jumbling everything up in a fiery pit between her legs, making her cry out and into him.
Kairi knew the feeling. He knew what was missing inside her. That part of him that was missing also knew that, fighting its way out of constricting pants and into her eager body. But for now – Tendo was stronger!
Answering Sakura’s non-verbal pleas, Tendo touched two fingers to her entrance, pushing them inside slowly, knuckle by knuckle. He could’ve started with one, but she was so wet already, so wet! Her walls pulsed around his fingers, while he explored more with pressure, curling his fingers experimentally. At one point, Nanase sucked in her breath and bit her lip – and so Tendo stayed there, pressing on, learning the inside of her body like an instrument. He knew he could’ve done it quicker and more effective with his tongue between her legs, but that would robe him of a sight – and Sakura was a sight to behold! Tendo wanted – ney, he needed – to remember her right now, the first ever time he brought her pleasure, the beginning of her journey as a woman. His woman! Sakura’s eyes were open, but he didn’t think she saw anything… She’d stop breathing and start again with a throaty inhale… her lips moved but sometimes he couldn’t hear a sound… and sometimes only her sounds existed – her ‘ahhh’ and ‘yeeeees’ and ‘pleeease’ and ‘more’… Kairi’s favorite was ‘more’. She trembled and thrashed in his half-embrace… and then she’d stilled in half-raised arch… The spring reached its limit and unwinded with thunder rocking her body, replacing every cell of her body with a speck of light! And the feeling was so foreign yet so natural, it broke her in pieces and healed her, leaving her with numbing buzz! She suddenly felt so tired… so spent… yet she still wanted more!
The sound from above made Nanase open her eyes – Tendo looked at her victorious… and smug… and he was sucking on his fingers… and then Sakura remembered where those fingers were just now. She squeezed her eyes shot and slammed her thighs together – and heard Kairi chuckle:
- Too late, baka… I already know what you taste like!
Sakura shook her head vigorously denying this thought from entering her mind – this was too scandalous to think of! Too intimate… too hot… she wanted it too much! And Tendo was too good at giving her ideas:
- Next time you invite me to the ‘cream party’, we’re skipping directly to desert…
Nanase moaned, feeling heat pulling in her abdomen again, collecting traces of pleasure lingering in her body. She opened her eyes bravely and caressed his chest, tracing the outlines of his abs down to the ridge of his pants. Kairi tensed at the touched and hissed at his lover:
- Sakura, wait…
- Why, sensei?
- Because… um… Oh, for fuck’s sake!
He sat up, dropping her hands off his body and groaned in frustration, yanking his hair with both hands. Nanase set up too, covering her breast shyly with one hand and reaching out to him hesitantly:
- What is it, sensei? Did I do something…?
Tendo didn’t let her finish and take blame for his own stupidity – he caught her hand, opened it and planted a kiss to her palm, cradling his face in it. Nanase felt he was burning up, tremors shaking his body in waves – yet he tried breathing deeply to calm down. Why?
- Sensei?
Barely audibly he said, apologetically:
- I didn’t take any condoms… it was just a Jenga game… And Ryuko is home, I can’t go there like this…
By the end of it Kairi was almost crying, letting go of fantasies of her body around him. Until she took his face in both her palms and raised it to look at him:
- Sensei, we’re both healthy, we’d just had our medical checkups and…
- Nanase, it’s not only for…
- … and I’m on a pill.
Tendo gulped, his eyes widening with found possibilities. Nanase took it as a question and rushed to explain:
- It’s the hormonal treatment for…
- I don’t care, - Tendo fell onto her, knocking her to the floor and swallowing the rest of her explanation with a deep searing kiss.
He did care. Kairi made a mental note to check on her medical condition later, consult with doctor Akai, their hospital’s top gynecologist, on whether it was the best treatment plan for whatever ailed her… but not now… now he was unimaginably grateful for this stroke of luck because it meant he didn’t have to stop now.
Kissing her felt different now. Now Tendo knew what she tasted like and could feel the notes of her intimate taste all over her skin. The scent of her arousal, tangy and spicy, tickled his nostrils, making his head spin as if he was drunk. He was drunk, actually – drunk on her naked body, splayed so openly beneath him, drunk on her hands drawing patterns on his skin, drunk on her touch when Nanase reached out and took hold of his belt buckle…
- May I? – she whispered, mirroring his words from before.
Tendo buried his face in the crook of her neck, inhaling deeply and trying to calm the frenzy ranging in his chest. Was he ready for this? For her hands so close to where he wanted them the most? Would he be able to take it?
Having decide to test himself, Kairi stood up, taking Sakura by the hand to help her rise up. Sakura kneeled before him, sitting back on her heels, her hand reaching out to his belt again. Tendo nodded.
Sakura unbuckled the clasp, slightly surprised how smooth her movements were, as if she wasn’t shaking head to toe from the anticipation of what she was about to uncovered. Maybe, it was her medical training – she did undress people before, many times – or maybe she was already in the eye of the hurricane, where everything was deceptively calm and only whistling sound in her ears reminded her that she is about to be snatched off the ground into dangerous whirlwind of their combined passion. Shaking her head to focus on the task at hand, Sakura repeated Tendo’s approach from before, easing both his pants and underwear off his hips and letting them drop, pooling around his ankles. Kairi stepped out slowly and shoved the clothes aside – and stilled again. Sakura followed that movement and then raised her eyes up, slowly, admiring her sculpted calves, thighs and then…
Sakura saw naked men before; she was a nurse after all. But not anyone who was beautiful… and so visibly wanting. His male member throbbed and jumped a bit under her gaze, vain bulging alongside its very impressive length. Nanase suddenly felt her mouth watering just thinking of what it would taste like… if she were only to taste a little… just a tip…
Tendo’s hands, clenched in tight fists, were glued to his sides, stopping him from touching her. He waited for Sakura’s inspection to be over, giving her time to get used to him like this. But when he saw Nanase licking her lips, reaching out to him, to that part of him – he intersected her hand immediately! Sakura looked at him questioningly, her voice sounding from afar, as if she was lost in some hypnotic trance:
- Why? I thought it was my turn…
Kairi saw a white light furiously flashing across his sight and his knees almost buckled. Her touch – he wanted it so much! But… but…
- Because I would die, Nanase. I’ll explode…
She bit her lip, not sure what to do next. Tendo leaned in and raised Sakura by the waist, making her sit on the bed. Crouching before her, he kissed her lips, her arms, taking more time to thoroughly lavish her breasts in licks and kisses and bites – until her body relaxed from the disappointment of his refusal and she leaned back inviting him to continue. Tendo said softly, in between covering her skin with imprints of his mouths:
- This time… I will… love you. Next time… you can… if you want to… love me.
Sakura didn’t quite understand that suggestion but was willing to go with whatever – as long as it meant this tension inside her kept rising as it did now… and long as his body was melting into hers like it did now… as long as his kisses were getting closer and closer to…
- Agh… sensei… unnnn… what… aaaah… are…
- Shh, Nanase… all of you… is mine.
Her taste was stronger than before, more vivid – it was burning him with white fire, bringing him pleasure he didn’t know was possible on the giving end of this play. Her fingers, lost in the trusses of his hair again, flexed in unison with her body movements, instinctive waves of her hips to press into his mouth. Tendo hummed and the vibrations translated into Sakura’s scream, broken and commanding:
- More!
And this time, he had more! Kairi gave her one more wide lick and then covered her body, pressing Sakura into bed. Her legs circled his hips, aligning them perfectly, and they both felt when his hardness found an entrance to her wet softness. Tendo slowed down to a glacial pace, savoring the feeling of her body enveloping him, tugging him in, inviting… until he reached that resistance barrier, natural protective layer of her virginity. He tried warning her:
- Nanase…
She nodded immediately and raised her hips as much as she could being weighted down by his body:
- Come.
- Nanase… it will…
- I know.
- Nanase… I can…
- Kairi… come!
He wanted to say he could wait a little longer, letting her adjust to him. But hearing Sakura say his name, for the first time… exhaling it with so much love and tenderness… undid him. Tendo fell into her… her deep, waiting, accepting body, her warmth and passion… her whole self. His Sakura, his.
She jerked and he heard her whine. Something hot and wet touched his cheek, Tendo tuned and caught a glimpse of a single tear rolling down the side of her face before she looked away. Guilt took a squeezing hold of his heart for he has hurt the woman he loved, though it could’ve not been avoided. He pleaded, showering her face, her hair, her neck with kisses:
- Nanase, my precious one, I’m sorry… I’m so sorry… please, forgive me, please…
Tendo felt her arms enveloping him in embrace and rubbing soothing circles on his back – Sakura was consoling him! She smiled at him and he could almost believe that smile, if it wasn’t for the tension in her jaw from biting back the pain. Sakura said in overly calm tone:
- Shh, sensei, I’m alright… it just… stings. I will be alright…
- What can I do?
- Move.
He was ready to be still for the rest of his life even if it killed him – so Tendo wasn’t expecting her command to move! He checked:
- But wouldn’t it..?
- It would… but it stings either way… and before… I liked it when you moved.
He needed no more invitations and permissions than that – instinct took over and lead him into rhythm, as old as time itself, picking up the pace when he felt Sakura respond to his thrusts with her own. At that moment only her body attached him to life, only she held the power to turn all of his pent-up frustration into pure blinding energy that drove him further, deeper, faster! He marched to the drum of pulse beating in his temples and to the sound of her cries, chanting his name with every breath… everything was there in his name falling off her lips – the urgency, the love, the explanation, the miracle… ‘Kairi… Kairi… Kairi… Kai... Kai... nnnnnn... Kai... ahhh... Kai... ohhhh... Kai... reeeee...'. And then he felt her tighten around him, her mouth falling open in a silent scream. So tight, so, so tight! Pulsing, wet, gliding, velvet… He should’ve stopped, should’ve waited – but then she commander again in the sweetest of commands:
- Kairi… come.
One dive… another one… he heard her teeth rattle… another one… her nails dug into his asscheeks urging him to thrust impossibly deeper… one more, hard… her bed shaking dangerously under his rush… and another, and another… And lightning struck through his spine! ..and the world seized to exist, and only blazing hot stream of energy rushed through his body, collecting everything he was to give to her! To press it into her, again and again, so he could stay in her forever, and be lifeless and alive in the same time! And be hers!
- I love you, Sakura Nanase! I adore you, I worship you, I live and breathe you! Thank you… Oh, Nanase, thank you so much!
Her response was of a warm hug and a kiss to his chest. Few moments later her grip loosened and Tendo heard her breathing softly, evenly – his newly-made woman fell asleep. He carefully stood up, brought a warm wet cloth from the bathroom and cleaned them both up. Sakura didn’t even stir when Kairi freed the covers and blanket from underneath her. He chuckled softly at his sleeping beauty and joined her in that tiny bed of hers where two people would have to snuggle really tight not to fall off at night. Tendo was fine with that – he wasn’t planning to let her go anyways. Ever.
*** *** ***
Tendo turned the corner and stopped, leaning against the wall. He closed his eyes, fighting off tangles of headache creeping up his skull. Today wasn’t that difficult from the work perspective, per se, his patients were going well all things considered, two new came in and preparation for scheduled surgeries was on the way. But something… something was just off.
He knew that the reason was Nanase. The fact that he’d upset her this morning and she’d ran away before he could apologize… The fact that she’d sent in his lunch with a sweet and cheerful note, but didn’t want to come personally… Kairi was obsessed with seeing her again to the point that he hallucinated her walking on the other end of the corridor – but when he ran up to the spot, she’d disappeared in the thin air, like mirage.
He hasn’t seen her in five days. Nurse Sakai got sick and Nanase agreed to change her shifts for night ones to help out. So, the only time they saw each other was during morning and evening check-ins, in the hospital, with other staff present.
Kairi missed her so much! Missed holding her small frame through the night, missed the smell of her hair, the brightness of her smile… His wife’s silly songs she’d made off recipes and were singing during cooking… Color pencils scattered on the floor and handmade brochures she prepared for her patients with post-surgery care routines lying around the apartment… Kairi missed her curious button nose that would get into anything he was reading and then Nanase would ask him a million distracting questions... but he also missed her attentive and proud eyes when she was listening to his responses. He missed her one-of-a-kind mind, her forgiving soul, her optimistic heart… his wife, Tendo Nanase.
And he’d also missed her body. The slopes and ridges, the depth of it, the taste, the scent… Just thinking of it made his body tense and his pants become uncomfortably tight. It’s only been five days… and they’d been married for five months… but there was no saturation with her, no ‘enough’, no ‘slowing down’ or ‘marriage routine’. Every day with her was a new handwritten page of happiness, every night was a study of passion and abandon. Kairi was addicted to his wife, and blissfully so. If was as if she was a hormone that his body wasn’t producing and was lacking all his life even without knowing. And then Nanase broke in, forcefully, with stubborn conviction – and his life finally tilted towards the happiness. She reminded him how to laugh, helped him to find his own heart and challenged a man in him. The challenge was to love Nanase so much that her first man would always be her only man – and she wouldn’t miss out on anything! And Kairi missed the challenge for five days now! In a row!
The first night when he came home, on Monday, Kairi realized Nanase wasn’t sleeping in their bed but rather on the couch. He called her up to ask for a reason… and his wife told him the bed was too big for her without him… and couch cushions smelled like him… because this is where he read. Kairi bit his lip and moaned silently, feeling his groin getting heavier and hotter. Later, he slept in their bed because sheets smelled of her, of her tangled dark hair that covered his face like a canopy when she rode him the night before, of her screams and bites, her uninhibited desire for him…
But now… he was losing her scent in their apartment… the sheets were too cold.
And tonight was her last night shift. Tomorrow was a weekend for both of them. Nanase will come home and he will wake up to the sound of her cooking or singing or both. And he will hold her in his arms and inhale her and everything will be all right again. Kairi just needed to survive till then.
*** *** ***
Kairi looked at his watch – 5 pm. Two hours till the end of his shift, one hour till Nanase comes in for evening check-in, fourteen hours till she comes back home after her shift. He could make it because he would get to see her in an hour… just one hour.
Or not... Reacting to the screams and gurgling sounds in the nearby room, Tendo rushed in to find Nanase struggling to contain a male patient trashing on the bed. Two nurses quickly ran in past him, one adjusted patient’s IV drip, other injected something into his shoulder – and things quieted really quickly. Nanase let go of patient’s arms and turned to the chief nurse, not noticing Tendo standing behind her:
- I’m so sorry, I don’t know what happened! I was giving him his dinner and…
The fact that she was feeding the patient was very evident seeing how Nanase was covered in pieces of vegetables and stains of fruit tea that were served for dinner today. Chief nurse rushed to calm Nanase down, side-eyeing Tendo suspiciously because he still hasn’t announced his presence to his wife:
- It’s ok, Nanase-chan, it’s not your fault, his anti-seizure meds weren’t adjusted yet, we’re waiting for Doctor Kisugi to come in later and do that. You should go and clean up before your shift starts. Why did you come so early anyways?
Nanase looked at the floor shyly and said:
- It’s a… personal matter. I thought I’d help with dinner first and then go find Tendo-sensei and…
That’s when Kairi took his que and grabbed his wife by the forearm, tugging her towards him. Nanase looked up and shy delight crossed her face, leaving unmistakable blush behind. She bowed to him demurely:
- Tendo-sensei, I’ll be at the evening check-in as soon as…
- You have broccoli in your hair…
- Yes, I’ll go take a shower and be back when…
- I’ll take care of it. Come.
Tendo dragged his wife away from two nurses, smirking at him with knowing smiles. Nanase tried arguing, while almost running behind him to keep up with the pace:
- Tendo-sensei, we have shower next to the nurses’ station, I can be back very quickly, I don’t want to impose on doctors’ premises.
- That’s not where we’re going…
Nanase looked at him incredulously but Tendo paid no attention to her surprise while continuing to their destination, using the most inconspicuous of paths to avoid meeting more colleagues and more questions. As they walked, Nanase started to recognize the halls of this secluded and posh wing – and her suspicions were confirmed when Tendo opened and closed behind her a door to one of VIP suites. Nanase spooked and tried to rush out of the door:
- Sensei, we can’t use VIP suites for showers! Mariko-san will not allow it! Nurses are sent to this wing only by assignment!
Tendo caught her by the shoulders and pressed her against the door. Nanase looked up, her mouth open to protest more – and all her protests drowned in the deep, hungry kiss her husband landed on her. Humming noise in the back of his throat vibrated through her body, making her weak in the knees – and if she weren’t being held up against the door by his strong hands, Nanase would probably have dropped. Something in her mind that was responsible for manners and propriety switched off, giving way to the wave of familiar anticipation. She moaned into his mouth, biting his lower lip a little and hearing him respond with sharp inhale. With visible difficulty, Tendo tore himself off his wife and rested his forehead on the door above her shoulder. He said, short of breath:
- You aren’t here as a nurse… it’s still one hour till your shift… you’re here as my wife… and I have a privilege to come here whenever I wish to.
Nanase peeped from around his back and looked around the room. Tendo stepped away to give her a better overview, while trying to do some calming breathing exercises himself – while Nanase was technically not at work yet, he was and he needed to go back to his patients soon enough, before Koichi-kun comes in to change him.
Nanase walked around the room and noticed all the things that made this room different from lavish suites for VIP patients. First of all, it wasn’t all that lavish – furniture was much simpler than she’d remembered, fewer decorations, much smaller TV set and no vases with live flowers. The bed wasn’t one of the standard motorized hospital beds but rather simple-frame queen-size bed with few extra cushions. Overall, the room looked like a mix of a hotel room and an office, the office part represented by a big desk near a window which was obviously used by doctors since it was covered in piles of folders and X-ray files.
Nanase asked:
- What is this room? Some… doctors’ lounge?
Tendo chuckled:
- Not exactly, no. When this wing was refurbished for VIP suites, this room was deemed too small for the high standards of VIP patients, so hospital’s management decided to keep it for the doctors in charge. Today that’s me. We use it occasionally to work, research, take a shower or sleep, if time allows.
Nanase looked around and noticed the door that led to the bathroom. She suddenly remembered how silly she must look with patient’s dinner displayed all over her and started towards the door – and then stopped. Her eyes darted between bathroom and exit door and back. Tendo asked:
- What? You don’t have to worry, nobody would walk in, it can only be open with our badges. There’s also a latch on the bathroom door, if you want to use it…
- That’s not it… My spare uniform is in my locker, I need to go take it.
Tendo nodded but stopped Nanase when she tried to walk out:
- You go take your shower, I’ll bring your things and get back to my patients. There is shower gel and shampoo on the stall, towels are in the cupboard by the door. I’ll be back soon!
And with that Kairi landed a quick chaste kiss on his wife’s forehead and left the room, covering the distance in wide strides to come back faster. Nanase sighted with a tinge of disappointment – she was hoping for more time with her husband when she came to work earlier, but, alas, her unfortunate incident derailed her plans. She made a quick work of undressing, folding her uniform neatly and going into bathroom. The shower stall was a standard edition for medical facilities, with sturdy railings on two levels and spray nuzzles from top to bottom for stimulating massage, if needed. And while Nanase wouldn’t mind a massage this time to relieve her of coiling tension inside, she didn’t want to overstep the hospitality of this secret lounge. Her shower would be quick and efficient!
Meanwhile, Tendo thought along the same lines – that his wife will be in and out in a split second – so he rushed to get her things before she had to come out of the shower… draped in a towel only… warm and wet… focus, Kairi!
Easier said than done! Images rushed through his mind, offering all the ways he could help her shower, to make sure that all her hidden spots were well taken care of and…
- Tendo-kun! Just the man I was looking for!
Kairi turned around and stumbled upon seeing Koichi’s smiling face, while his fellow doctor approached to greet him. Tendo responded automatically, still trying to focus his gaze and shake off the effects of feverish daydreaming. He looked at his watch and said:
- I need to take Nanase’s spare uniform and then I’d be back to brief you about…
- Yeah, I know, Kaori-san valve repair prep and Nakoishi-san pacer implant surgery. Mariko-san already gave me all the charts, I’m fully up to speed! So, unless there’s something else you want to tell me… you’re off duty as of now!
And he winked at Kairi. He winked at him! Tendo frowned and stepped back, as if from a blow… Was he THAT obvious? Did the entire hospital know that he was a horny idiot obsessed with his wife? Was there a conspiracy to get him laid?!
He was supposed to be offended at that prospect, outraged even! But at that moment, all he could hear was ‘it’s still an hour till her shift starts… and she’s still in the shower… shower…’.
Tendo nodded, rushed to grab Nanase’s clothes and flat our ran back to the VIP wing at full speed. He thought he’d heard a choir of chuckles and quiet laughs from nurses’ station – but he couldn’t care less! His image be damned – he was, after all, horny idiot obsessed with his wife!
*** *** ***
Nanase was absolutely planning to get out of the shower any minute now… but the hot water was so soothing and energizing in the same time, massaging her stiff shoulders with high-pressure streams. She’d heard her husband come into the room again and cried out to him:
- Sensei, I’ll be out soon! Please, leave my uniform and get back to your patients! I’ll be fine here!
She stretched, checking how her muscles relaxed, and rinsed her hair once again. Nanase turned her head to face the water, her eyes closed and her lips smiling – she just loved hot showers very much. She’d found the faucet by touch and before she could turn it off, a strong hand stopped her, other circled her waist and pressed her to the obviously naked male body and a familiar voice whispered to her ear:
- Don’t. I need a shower too.
Her rational mind reminded her about time, schedules, something-something… But her female body swayed into him, feeling him grinding back into her. Tendo let go of her hand and caught one of her nipples between his fingers, tuning it up to the sensitive aroused state. His whisper came between bites of her neck and shoulder:
- You know, personal hygiene is a very serious matter in medical profession. I do need to make sure that you are clean here… - he followed the outline of her breast, then the other, - … here… - his hand trailed back down, his nails sliding across her wet skin, - and here too… - Tendo’s fingers split the hair in the apex of her thighs and slipped in, circling, teasing.
Nanase grabbed the railing in front of her with one hand and Tando’s wet hair above her with another and held on for the sensual assault. Her lover knew what he was doing – his exceptional mind, when focused on her body, was inventive, generous and wicked! Nanase felt dizzy and inflamed and this time it had nothing to do with a fog of hot air around her and water running down her body. One last rational thought escaped almost involuntary:
- Your shift…
He buckled into her, making Nanase lose balance and stumble forward, almost hitting the metal railing she was holding. Kairi held her back, using the hand that was buried knuckles deep into her body to anchor her back to him. Nanase cried out and he repeated the motion again, and again. When he hissed his answer into her hair, Nanase was too far gone past remembering her question at all:
- Another doctor already took over. We have time…
Something flashed inside Nanase, an understanding, a memory… There was something she liked doing when they had time. A reckoning…
Nanase took all of her will power – and physical strength – to push herself off the glass wall in front of her. She unclutched Tendo’s hands holding her in place, whining momentarily on the loss of the fullness and heat his fingers provided. Nanase turned around and faced him, her gorgeous demi-god husband, built of steel and velvet… and desire. She pushed back, and back – until Tendo stopped at the opposite glass wall, awkwardly placing his elbows on the upper railing. He looked at her surprised, but aroused and willing to go wherever this was leading to. Nanase smiled – her special smile that meant so many things now – and told him, touching her fingers to his upper arms:
- Hold on. Don’t let go.
He nodded automatically thinking of what she may be planning – and then there was no thinking possible! Nanase’s lips landed everywhere on his skin, licking off droplets of water, biting across sensitive spots, soothing bite marks with wide strokes of her tongue… Her hands caressed his body, explored with soft touches, marked with red lines, loved him, worshiped… When Nanase went down on her knees, Tendo groaned and threw his head up, feeling heat wash over him from inside… and when she took him into her mouth and sucked in the whole length of his shaft… Tendo saw stars! Her wet lips, the perfect pressure, just the right rhythm… his body was no longer his, coiling numbness was taking over, turning off circuits in his body and his brain… He missed her so much!
With the last tendrils of sanity escaping him, Tendo begged:
- Nanase, please…
She released him with a plop and asked, kissing his thigh and continuing her rhythm with the palm of her hand:
- Yes, anata?
Kairi bent over and grabbed her by the waist, turning around and hoisting her up on the lower level railing. She circled her legs around him and locked them behind his back, catching Kairi and tugging him close to her body. He kissed her, hungrily, urgently… then begged again:
- Say it…
- What, anata? What should I say, Kairi?
And there it was – those special words that drove him crazy! Because he knew how many barriers had to melt in Nanase’s mind for her to call him by the name, to address him as ‘husband’… and he did this to her! She was his – ripe, willing, ready to be taken, ready to take him too!
Invitation was so close… Unmistakable scent that was not washed away by shower but only amplified by the steamed glass compartment… slick wetness where their bodies longed to be connected… her lips and her whimpers on the base of his neck… and her searching hands, digging nails into his asscheeks to bring him home.
- Kairi, please…
He plunged deep, reaching the core of her female self in one go! Plunging in and out with a force that could easily shutter the tempered glass behind her back – for every night he’d spent without her, for every time his fingers flexed to find her body in the darkness and didn’t, for every time he couldn’t remember her scent… There were many, many times like this and so he worked them all out into her, into her accepting body, her unreserved screams, her ‘more’ and ‘harder’!
It was too much too fast for him! He waited for so long! Numbness took over again, flowing from where their bodies connected to the outsides of his body and beyond. Kairi cried out her name and heard her whisper ‘five’. Four… three… two… one!!! His wife convulsed around him, froze for a moment and then fell apart with a low, almost pained scream! Her body sucked him in… three… two… one!!! And he followed! Ignited nerves exploding, heart jumping out of his chest and everything around him turning into blissful darkness, filled with her satisfied humming and the sound of running water…
*** *** ***
When his vision cleared, Kairi found himself sitting on the shower floor, his wife still circling his hips, smiling at him mischievously. Nanase kissed his nose and said:
- Anata… long time no see!
Kairi groaned – his wife would be the death of him! But, on a plus side, he’d die a very happy man! His usual cold-blooded demeanor creeped back into steamy bathroom and he said:
- Only you would joke like that in this situation! Baka!
Nanase waved him off and stood up carefully, holding the railing not to slip up on the wet floor. She picked up the shower gel and washcloth and handed them to Kairi:
- Since you here, you can help me wash my back, I couldn’t reach it before…
Her voice was so seductively nonchalant, Tendo chuckled. He loved these short periods right after lovemaking when his wife was still riding the hormone rush and her inhibitions and self-imposed limits didn’t apply. With time, these periods became longer, and his wife was getting bolder with him, going as far as calling him by the name even outside their bedroom! That only happened few times but Kairi was willing to put in whatever effort it took – especially considering he enjoyed the effort itself beyond comprehension! His favorite treatment plan ever!
Kairi helped Nanase wash up and she did the same for him, taking time to be tender and soft with each other, sharing smiles and small kisses. When they came out, Nanase changed into her spare uniform and went to the fridge to fish out some water. She brought him a bottle too and made sure he drank up all of it. While dressing up, Tendo noticed that something changed in his wife’s demeanor – something awkward, uncertain… reserved?
His morning behaviour came to mind and Tendo opened his mouth to apologise – when Nanase dragged him by the sleeve to sit on the couch.
- Kairi, we need to talk.
He dreaded this talk, but it was necessary. He just hoped that her responsiveness before meant she would forgive him soon.
- Nanase, about today, I was wrong, I shouldn’t have…
Tendo tried to speak fast, to get as much of his apologies out before his wife’s too-forgiving heart will absolve him of all sins, as she usually did. But that wasn’t what she’d interrupted him with.
- It’s not about today. I mean, it is, in a way, but it’s not your fault, it’s mine. Well… yours too, but mostly mine.
She nodded and stayed with lowered head, observing her hands clutched together. Tendo sat closer, taking her hands into his and kissing them, knuckle by knuckle.
- Nanase, I should not have scolded you. I upset you and made you run away from me.
His wife raised her head and looked him in the eyes, her expression perplexed. She looked up, as if remembering something, then back at him with a smile:
- Ananta, it’s not why I ran away. I just didn’t want you to see me get sick, I didn’t feel well this morning.
- Sick? Nanase, what’s wrong? How are you feeling? Have you been to the doctor? Should we go now?
- Shh, I’m fine. Yes, I’ve been to the doctor, today, when I brought you lunch.
So, he did see her in the corridor today, it’s wasn’t a hallucination! But… but…
- Why didn’t you come see me right after? What did the doctor say?
Nanase smiled again and kissed his fingers wrapped around her hands.
- I wanted to come, but first there was an appointment with Akai-san, then blood tests, then ultrasound… When I was done, I came here but you were already in the OR so I left to prepare for my shift.
Tendo huffed with irritation:
- Nanase, the timeline was clearly not the most important part of my question! What did Akai-san say? Is your hormonal treatment not working? What were the blood tests about? What should I know? Say it already!
Nanase chewed on her lower lip and looked away – her tell for immense insecurity – and then took something out of her pocket and handed it over to Kairi.
Kairi unfolded few sheets of paper with hospital header on them – blood test, diagnosis, ultrasound results… On top of it all, attached by the staple, there was a small rectangular picture with classic ultrasound triangle. With shades, and echos… and one unmistakable white dot. Numbers ran in front of his eyes… sizes, estimated gestation period, heartbeat rate… His little white dot has already had a heartbeat!
Papers spilled out to the floor and Tendo didn’t even notice. He looked at his wife with unblinking eyes and whispered hoarsely:
- Are you… pregnant?
Nanase nodded, her pale face looking so lost and guilty now! She rushed into explanation:
- I didn’t think it was it, I thought that was just aftereffect from switching to new treatment! Sensei, I know, you didn’t plan for this, I didn’t want to put you in this position…
- Treatment…
- Yes, Akai-san said it’s practically impossible that such treatment could result in pregnancy but then…
- No, Nanase, listen! – Kairi shook her by the shoulders, his voice frantic, - did you cancel the treatment? You were taking it this whole time! Can it harm our baby?!
- Our… baby?
Nanase looked at him, his worried eyes, his trembling lips – and realization dawned on her! Her smile rose above them like a rainbow, happy, unreserved, eternal! She touched her fingers to his furrowed brow and asked:
- So… you want it?
Tendo brows furrowed further but this time with different question in mind!
- Do I want it? Nanase, you loveable idiot! Of course, I want our baby! How could you possibly think anything else?!
- Well, we haven’t discussed it… and it wasn’t in your plan…
- What plan, Nanase? There was no plan before you! You are the plan! And whatever comes from you, around you and for you – it is my plan!
He hugged her to his chest tightly and Nanase heard his heart thundering in his chest in unison with quickened breathing. His lips whispered something into her hair, but she couldn’t make out the words. Then Kairi tore her away from him again and ask anxiously:
- The treatment? Will it harm the baby?
Nanase smiled and bent over to pick up the scattered papers. She found the right one and showed it to her husband:
- According to this, our baby is a fighter! If treatment did not deter the consumption, then the treatment would have no effect on early gestation, especially, since I stopped it already. The baby is fine, Kairi, all the results are normal for our 6-weeks old sweet pea!
Sweet pea! Their baby had a size and a heartbeat, and it was fine and healthy and growing inside the woman he loved! Kairi hugged her again, sitting her comfortably on his lap, because he wasn’t planning to let her go for a long time, her shift and schedule all but forgotten! He wanted to talk to her… ask her about morning sickness that she was apparently hiding from him… if she had any cravings yet because Kairi wanted her to have them so he could satisfy the littlest of her needs… if she wanted a boy or a girl – but he already knew Nanase would say ‘as long as it’s healthy and happy’… they needed to discuss buying a house because they weren’t raising a family in his old bachelor apartment!.. he wanted to talk baby names…
Kairi wanted to keep them safe and comfortable in the protective shield of his body, to let Nanase know how much he loved and cherished her and their baby – his two 0,0001% impossible miracles! As they set there, him whispering soft words of love into her smiling lips, Tendo saw in her bright eyes how his life was expanding, to encompass him and his wife and all the possibilities and surprises, and all the promises he was about to make, and all the changes he was so looking forward to right now! And all thanks to her, his shining wife, little brave hero who fought her way through his darkness and thorns – to give him acceptance, hope, happiness, and, eventually, life!
And to him there was no doubt that love like this will last forever…
#koi wa tsuzuku yo dokomademo#an incurable case of love#love lasts forever#ksana writes stuff#you can see how in love i am#i haven't written in ages
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It’s a Great Big World (She’s Just Another Girl)
Oikawa x Fem!Reader
Summary: Support comes in many forms, he knows that, but being told by his friends that he'll move on doesn't help when he's not ready to. Promising someone something they don't want isn't the way to fix things. This isn't even something that can be fixed. Not by them, at least.
Song: Just Another Girl- The Killers
Word Count: 2479
A/N: Angst is my favourite to write, I’m sorry.
Warnings: Alcohol consumption.
Sitting in the locker room, the dam he'd built starts to break again, and he tries his best to keep it in place, to stay stable. He's here to play volleyball. He needs to get you out of his mind.
"Oikawa?" That's his name. Isn't it? It doesn't feel right. He doesn't feel a connection to it, not anymore. He doesn't feel a connection to much these days. Not when you're not here. "Oikawa!"
"What?!"
"The games about to start." Oh, right. He's a volleyball player. Hadn't he just thought about that? How did he forget? You'd always supported his career, he still has pictures of you in his jacket, holding a sign with his name. He wonders if you think about him. If you see a match on TV and wonder how he's doing, if you search his name sometimes to catch up on his progress. If you still care, like you used to when you belonged to him, when you didn't have someone else's ring on your finger.
"Are you sure you're okay to play?"
"I'll be fine." He doesn't mean it, doesn't believe it, and when he steps on the court his usual persona doesn't come to him. It's like you took Oikawa with you, left him as lonely, broken Tōru. He can barely register the game. When he serves the ball he doesn't feel it hit his hand, the yells of the crowd don't reach his ears. The next thing he processes is that he's staring at the ceiling, and he's not sure why. A face comes into his field of vision, filled with concern, words he can't hear spilling from his mouth. Does his knee hurt? He must have fallen on it. Why doesn't he care? Is he really that broken?
"It's like you weren't even present in the game. What's going on with you?" Iwaizumi's glare burns into the side of his head as he stares upwards. Tōru hadn't even realised he was in the country. Perhaps he'd come to see him play, flown all this way, and he'd disappointed his friend- just like he'd disappointed you. So many times he'd disappointed you. That's why you left, right? "Oikawa." Iwa doesn't sound angry, Oikawa knows his angry voice, but the concern laced into his voice is worse than anger.
"I miss her, Iwa."
"You miss-...who?"
"Y/N."
"Still?
""What do you mean still?"
"Its been 2 years. This isn't healthy, Tōru." It's been a long time since he heard his given name from his best friends mouth. "It's time to move on."
"What, like she did?"
"Are you mad at her for that?"
"No! No, I'm not I just... All I do is think about her and she's out there planning a wedding that isn't ours."
"You'll find someone. Someone you're meant to marry."
"Did that really just come out of your mouth?"
"I'm trying to help you, dumbass." He doesn't say anything else. Talking about it hurts too much. It's the only thing that does hurt anymore. He never thought he'd miss other types of pain.
Next time he's in Japan, he can't help but drive past your house. It's stupid, he knows it is, but he finds himself on your street before he knows it. Your bicycle isn't in the driveway and neither is his car, and the fact that you're not home brings him no comfort. Maybe you're working, you always loved your job. He can so easily recall the glint in your eyes as you talked about it, the extra hours you dedicated to it until you were so exhausted you ended up crying in his arms, desperate for rest that you wouldn't allow yourself. He wonders if you still do that, if you cover other people's shifts until you've gone 15 days without a day off and you can barely stand, if you still have a whole cabinet in that house dedicated to coffee. He doesn't know how long he's sat here, mind wandering. He desperately wants to know if you're still the girl he knew two years ago. The girl he did nothing but let down; the girl he stood up time after time, who he never told he loved enough, who he was never really there for. He drove you away, he knows that. He's probably better alone, he can't ruin things if it's just him. He wishes he could handle being by himself. He knows he can't. A car horn sounds behind him, and he realises where he is. Maybe he's not in the right mindset to be driving. He makes his way home regardless, somehow without zoning out again.
The house feels empty, as it has for the past 2 years. Sometimes he still expects you to be there, reading on the couch or sleeping hunched over the desk in the study. Things lack colour now, and that isn't a metaphor. Your purple and yellow blanket no longer lives on the armchair in the corner, none of the painted photo frames you'd put on the walls remained. Everything about you had been bright, and without you it was like he'd been plunged into an endless night. How could he move on, knowing he'd never see the sunlight again?
3 weeks after what would've been your 4 year anniversary, Oikawa finds himself at the house of a lady who claims to be a fortune teller. He doesn't know if he believes in it, he thinks he probably doesn't, but- well, desperate measures and all that. After all, who's to say it's not real? He believes in aliens, maybe he can find it in himself to believe in this too. Although, even aliens have lost some of their appeal. Too many memories tied to you for that. He almost wishes he could erase you from his mind, reclaim the things he shared with you as his own, but he doubts that would dull the emptiness in his heart. When she tells him he'll move on, that there's happiness and love in his future, that the pain she senses in him (she says this as if she figured it out, but it's not that much of an epiphany considering he told her about it when he first sat across from her) will ease- well, he really tries to believe her. The truth is, he's not sure he wants to move on. It's not like he can't let you go, he'd just rather have you back. The whole ordeal leaves him a little disoriented, if he's being honest, and suddenly he finds himself at home again with almost no memory of leaving her house.
Time seems to move differently these days, but there's no consistency to that change. Some days he gets in the shower and finds himself at the table 3 days later, food he doesn't even remember cooking sat in front of him. Other days he lies in bed for weeks on end, but when he looks at the clock only 5 minutes have passed. He's not sure what changed- perhaps it was him. Maybe he's losing his grip on reality. Then again, he doesn't know if he ever had one in the first place, and that's probably why he's so lost without you. You were the only stability he ever really had. It's hard to believe that the world moves on, that you moved on. All those trips you planned, the dreams you shared with him, the late night talks and the existential crises and the way you'd sometimes crack an egg on the back of his head while you were baking just to laugh when you watched him go red- those moments weren't his anymore. They were never really his at all, just something you let him be a part of. His access to your life had been cut off so suddenly, and quite frankly he feels he'd rather have lost access to his own.
When he gets an invitation to the wedding of one of his team members, he tries to quell the pang of guilt as he stashes it in a drawer and tries not to cry. He probably won't go. Is it rude to miss the happiest moment of someone's life because he's heartbroken? It's probably ruder to have a mental breakdown at someone elses wedding, and he's not sure he can handle such a painful reminder of something he never got to do with you. He wonders why they're getting married so fast, and then realises that it's not really that fast at all. Time is actually moving for the rest of the world, it's just Tōru who's stuck in the past. Sometimes he wakes up to a cold bed and wonders why you're not there, searching for you until it hits him that you left and he falls apart all over again. But when he looks back on your relationship and finds nothing but his flaws- he can't bring himself to blame you for not sticking around.
Your biggest point of contention could have been so easily fixed. The countless arguments, the nights you spent on the couch, the anger and betrayal in your voice when you would ask him about it- whether he told the truth or not. Your brother was a kid, is a kid, and honestly what kind of 24 year old fights with his girlfriends 16 year old brother? He wants to cry when he thinks about it. He pops up sometimes in your social media posts (and Tōru knows he shouldn't check them but he can't help himself- he needs proof you're still out there, that you didn't leave the world like you left him), in family vacations and wedding planning posts and a particularly tear jerking message to him when he got into the University he wanted, and if Tōru could apologise for the relationship he'd had with him, if he could give him all the love and luck in the world and be the older brother you'd begged him to try and be- well, maybe things wouldn't be so bad right now. Your fiancé- the word brings bile rising to his throat like a sickly tidal wave- seems to get on with him well, and that just drills even more holes in his already hollow heart.
"You know, you could get any girl you wanted." Mattsun offers, not so helpfully, when it's been nearly 3 years and he's still heartbroken. The engagement ring he'd bought you just before the breakup- the one he never gave to you- is stashed in the drawer next to his bed. Theyknow it’s still there.
"Yeah, dude, you'll find someone else. There's like a million people in the world-"
“Try 7 billion."
"Listen- nobody said I was smart," Makki points at him like he's debating something when he says this, and it's fairly obvious that he's more than a little drunk. They've all had their fair share, run up a tab that would make a sailor faint, but Oikawa couldn't feel more sober if he tried. "But I'm trying to help you here. My poi- my point is- well. Why are you so hung up on her? She's just- she's another girl, you know? Plenty of fish and all that. Unless fish aren't your thing."
"Why would fish be his thing?"
"I don't know man, I'm hammered."
"We all are. But you know, he's right! She clearly wasn't the one for you- you just gotta find the one who is."
"I don't- have either of you considered that she was the one for me, but I wasn't the one for her? You think after nearly three goddamn years of missing her I haven't tried? I can't move on. She's all there ever was for me and she's- she probably doesn't even think about me." The two men in front of him share a glance before Mattsun stands up.
"Come on. You gotta get home, get some rest." With one of their arms hooked around each of his, the two of them help him home.
When they enter his house- for the first time in a long while- they make no effort to hide their shock.
"Jesus Christ dude." Makki whispers.
"When was the last time you cleaned?"
"I don't know." He admits, but he's too numb to be ashamed. It's not like it's dirty, per se. He throws his trash away, and does his dishes and laundry, but he doesn't put books back, his furniture has been rearranged 4 times this week alone and-
"Are you sleeping in the living room?"
"I- I can't sleep in the bed anymore. It's too cold without her." He thinks the sympathy on their faces makes him feel worse than when they were telling him to get over you. When they finally leave, he sits on his pile of blankets and pillows, their words running through his mind.
If you were just another girl, he'd have moved on by now. He'd be able to sleep for more than an hour at a time, he wouldn't wake up crying after dreaming of you. He wouldn't feel the weight of exhaustion seeping into his bones with every step he took. Nights wouldn't be restless and painful, spent wishing he could turn back time until he got it right.
If you were just another girl the world would look the way it used to. Colours would still be bright, sunsets would bring him joy, he'd still go U.F.O watching at 3am. The moon wouldn't be distorted by his tears when he sat in the yard and stared at it- for hours or for seconds he was never sure. He'd still live in the world, rather than simply observing it's changes like a lost ghost. He's not dead- at least, he's pretty sure he isn't- but nothing he touches seems to move the way it used to, none of his emotions seem like they belong to him anymore.
If you were just another girl, he wouldn't be here. He wouldn't be sat in front of the TV, wondering why he can't hear it. If the sound is off, he can't bring himself to care enough to change that. Sometimes real people talk to him and he wonders why they're muted. Sometimes he wakes up halfway through the day- already going about his life but with no memory of anything before that moment. Sometimes it feels like he's watching himself through the TV he wastes so much time in front of. He wonders if he's depressed. He forgets what he was thinking about before he can come to a conclusion.
It's a great big world, and you're just another girl, but to Oikawa Tōru you're the only one in it worth anything. And it seems like you're the only one in it who wants nothing to do with him. He's stopped trying to get used to that.
taglist: @tremendousglitterthing @svtbitch @the-fandom-ness
#my writing#haikyuu#haikyuu!!#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu!! x reader#haikyuu imagines#haikyuu angst#oikawa#oikawa tooru#oikawa x reader#oikawa toru x reader#oikawa toru imagine#oikawa angst#oikawa tooru angst
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miyako and hikari (platonic) for 133?
Number 133: “Slushies aren’t just for kids. Fuck society!”
Characters: Miyako & Hikari. Finally, one of my 02 babies! This is set while the girls are maybe around 15 and 16.
I wrote this in first person as Hikari, just to give it a more casual, carefree feel! I hope you enjoy these teenager-y, summer vibes. The ending kind of sucks, but please ignore it. (Minor swearing)
Send me a prompt!
As a certified teenager, it’s safe to assume that I love summer. Why wouldn’t I? It’s the time of the year when you can pretty much do whatever you like. Summer is the grand time where the months-long prep and countdown for family vacations actually come in fruition.
But there’s danger that lurks during summer. It’s the trap of monotony where sleeping late, waking up at noon, watching endless TV, and playing video games for hours become a routine. Well, not if you are friends with Miyako.
Despite chatting with friends into the wee hours of the morning, the girl is an early riser. She’s the “get up and go” type, only grabbing a banana for breakfast as she sprints out the front door. Afterall, an object in motion in stays in motion.
It was the first Saturday of summer vacation when she barged into my room, a flurry of purple hair and lipgloss. “Hika!” she screeched. Miyako was one of the only people that called me by a nickname, and never failed to abuse this privilege. “What are you still doing in bed? If you want to go scope out hot guys on the beach with me, you have to get up. We’re burning daylight!”
I didn’t even have to glance at the clock to know that it was inhumanly early. The coffee machine in the kitchen was silent, and the sound of my brother snoring permeated the apartment. Somehow, I managed to pull myself away from the warmth of a slept-in comforter, yawning all the while. Before my feet hit the floor, Miyako was rummaging through my wardrobe, clicking her tongue in disapproval at my large collection of borrowed basketball t-shirts. “Hmm, where do all these come from, I wonder?” she asked pointedly. She laughed airily, flashing me a wink.
“Ha, ha, Miya, very funny. You know me and him are just friends,” I offered, attempting to stretch the sleep out of my joints. She shook her head in disapproval, purple ponytail swinging behind her.
A note about Miyako: she fancies herself a matchmaker, and believed I was her perfect target.
For years, she has tried everything to pair me up with my best friend. A few summers ago, she locked us both in the hall closet, smushing us between the extra linens and a scratchy, wool blanket. Takeru and I are pretty close, so we weren’t particularly bothered by our close proximity. We might have been able to enjoy our time together had Miyako not forgotten about us. It wasn’t until my brother came home from soccer practice that someone heard our desperate pleas for freedom. Ever since then, she has stayed out of it.
With a hum of approval, she tossed a sundress in my direction. I barely had time to catch the flimsy, yellow fabric before she barked out another order. “Go to the bathroom and put that on, we need to hurry.”
Another note about Miyako: Never argue with her when she gets in one of her Moods.
My socked feet padded their way silently to the bathroom, pausing only to check the time displayed in the hall: 7:45 in the morning. Changing quickly, I slipped the sundress over last season’s bathing suit, adjusting the straps as the material settled around my hips. Miyako, being a full year older than me, had taken puberty gracefully, filling out gradually and evenly. My body, it seemed, had other plans. The hips seemed to be its first priority, leaving the top of my dress little to fill itself out.
I made my way back towards my room, careful to avoid any creaky floorboards. Miyako sat atop my bed, flicking through a stray magazine. She hadn’t noticed my arrival, and I took my few extra moments of silence to study her.
This past semester, she had shot up several inches, giving her legs the slender look of a model. Her cut-off shorts only emphasized this fact. Her Hawaiian-esque button down should have been tacky, but she left the buttons undone, showing off her camisole underneath. A bathing suit top poked out from underneath it, accentuated her new curves. Compared to her, I felt like a little girl playing dress up.
While I struggled to coax the tangles out of my horrendous bedhead, Miyako gave me the rundown of the day. “Okay, so I was thinking we hit up Starbucks first. They have some new fruity lemonade that I’ve been dying to try, and I’m also kind of hungry.” As if to punctuate her statement, my own stomach growled, and I grinned sheepishly up at her. “Make that two of us,” I laughed.
She rambled on about sunbathing and beach volleyball, the metallic jingle of her bracelets accentuating every point. Miyako talked with her hands, making gestures large and small as if it would help the listener understand her better. Spoiler alert: it never did, but it was fun to watch all the same.
My hair finally tamed, I applied some light concealer, desperate to rid myself of the dark circles clinging underneath my eyes. “You know,” her jingling stops, “You really don’t need any makeup, Hika.”
I only snort in response; taking compliments has never been my forte. Grabbing my purse and phone, I slipped on a pair of sandals. “Okay, I’m ready.”
“Let’s rock and roll!”
-
As one could expect on the first weekend of summer vacation, Odaiba beach was cluttered with people. For mile it seemed the white sand was obscured by sunburnt bodies and an array of towels, but that was understandable.
The passing heat wave had been brutal. One could not go outside without sunscreen, lest risk getting sun poisoning. Within minutes, Miyako sucked her lemonade dry, settling on chewing the left-over ice. “Oh!” she squealed, bits of ice flinging about. “An empty spot, just over there!”
Years of running away from evil Digimon looked like practice as we narrowly dodged the ample bodies of beach-goers. Arms linked together; our feet kicked up sand behind us as we ran. Just as we were about to secure our small area, a blue beach towel obscured the white sand.
I was panting too hard to notice Miyako’s eyes light up or the stranger’s shadow obscure the sun’s rays.
“Hey, guys! What are you two doing here?” a familiar voice asked, humor lifting at the end of his question. My breathing stopped mid-pant, silently cursing whatever deity that would listen. Once my heartbeat was under control, I managed to stand up straight. Raising a singular eyebrow, I challenged our guest. “Well, Takeru, the last time I checked, this beach is open to the public.”
His blonde hair reflected the sunshine, a soft, golden glow haloing around him. As if I needed any more reason to fall in love with him. He laughed in good nature, smiling a boyish, toothy grin.
“You took our spot.” Miyako pointed out, arms crossed over her chest. Wrinkles formed between her brows, her effort to look more menacing. A pair of heart-shaped sunglasses shielded her hazel eyes, and I almost giggled at the thought of her trying to look domineering while wearing something so innocent.
“Who says we all can’t share?” he countered; blues eyes illuminated by mischief. Never one to back down from a challenge, Miyako stood her ground, “I don’t think so.”
Anxiety clenched at my stomach. As of late, being in a close proximity to Takeru made me nervous, especially when he was shirtless with little rivets of water trailing their way down his abs. He was no longer the cute little eight-year-old that sat with me by the campfire. Years of basketball practice had solidified his athletic figure, and two summers ago, his growth spurt had him towering over his own brother. Seeing him in nothing but a pair of swimming trunks did not help my flushed state.
“It’ll be fine, Miyako. We can just squish our towel beside his.” Rolling her eyes, she begrudgingly pulled out her Hello Kitty! themed towel, spreading it haphazardly on the ground. “Let’s just get in the water. That’s where all of the cute guys are, anyway.”
Takeru, for his part, pretended not to notice the hostility in her voice. He was as used to her moodiness as I was. Standing there awkwardly, he only made the move to leave as we began to strip down to our bikinis. “I should probably go find Ken and Daisuke. I’ll catch you both later,” he stammered, eyes intently focused on the granules of sand that had clung themselves to his hands.
Looking at each other, Miyako and I burst into a fit of giggles. She had a twinkle in her eyes as she wiggled her eyebrows in my direction. “No, absolutely not.” I deadpan, knowing exactly where this was about to go.
Her glossed bottom lip poked out, her attempt at a puppy-dog look. In my opinion, she looked more like a Kardashian, and when I told her exactly this, the lip was sucked right back in.
Though it was still pretty early, the sun was high in the sky. My cheeks were warm, and my shoulders had turned a light shade of pink. “We need to put some sunscreen on before we fry.”
“Nah, I’m good. I need to work on my tan anyway.” Miyako’s high-waisted bikini bottoms and halter bathing suit top suited her figure, the cornflower blue color complimenting the slight tan she had already developed. She raised an eyebrow at my pink one-piece, but I just shrugged. Shopping for a skimpy bathing suits had never been one of my priorities.
Neither of us felt comfortable oogling guys when our friends were here and apt to make fun of us, so the though of swimming was abandoned. I smeared sunblock on any bit exposed skin, using the technique a toddler would when icing a cake: all hands on deck.
The pair of us sprawled out, Miyako’s body covering most of the cartoon cat. My pale legs claimed Takeru’s towel as my own. His blonde hair had disappeared in the throngs of beachgoers, and considering that he wasn’t the sunbathing type, I figured he wouldn’t complain.
Rays of sunshine encapsulated me, and the muscles in my shoulders slowly unwound. Eyes closed, I only half-listened to surrounding conversation. A child begged his mother for ice cream while some teenaged girl made her move. A nearby volleyball game was in full swing, both teams shouting at one another. The summer air was stagnant, smelling of sunscreen, sweat, and salt.
We laid around, soaking in the sunshine and the freedom that came with summer vacation. Those last few weeks of school had been stressful. Between taking pictures for the school paper and studying for any upcoming exams, I had been ready to lose my mind. Takeru had also been acting strange, flip-flopping between avoiding me at all costs or never letting me out of his sight. It had all be so intense that I was grateful for Miyako’s distraction, even if it meant waking up at the ass-crack of dawn.
“Psst.” I whispered. I rolled onto my side, doing my best to ignore the way iced coffee moved around in my belly. In our haste to get to the overcrowded seaside, we had forgone any breakfast, hoping that caffeine would be enough to fuel us throughout the day. The rumble in my stomach proved otherwise.
Miyako groaned, peeking at me through her ridiculously long lashes. Note to self: interrogate her about the brand of mascara she uses.
“Psst, Miyako.” She ignored me once again, opting to rotate like a rotisserie chicken.
“Ugh, fine, I’ll go find food on my own.” I stood up, dusting invisible debris off of my legs. Sure enough, I had my friend’s full attention. Anything that involved eating always got her going. In a flurry of purple hair and sand, she was up on her feet, eyes searching for the nearest snack source. A laugh bubbled out of my throat. Miyako tended to do all things with a theatrical flair, making even the most mundane tasks enjoyable.
Once, in middle school, we were both sentenced to lunch duty. Our job was simple: serve food to our peers. Dishing out food was easy; just ladle the mystery meat on a plate and voila! You were finished. It would have been simple enough, had we not had to wear hairnets and white smocks that made us look more like a middle-aged lunch lady than we ever wanted to. Miyako was never the type to wallow in self-pity. She ignored the looks of sympathy other girls gave us and found pleasure in the odd slurp sound the food made when hitting the trays. Soon, it became a competition of who could create the best squelch, testing out different flinging techniques until we were satisfied. By then end of lunch period, our smocks were littered with oil stain, and our cheeks were sore from smiling.
Miyako channeled her inner lunch lady food-flinging abilities as she practically pushed innocent bystanders out of her way. God help those who stood between Miyako and, well, whatever it was that she wanted. Her ponytail navigated through the crowd, giving me no choice but to follow. Her legs lead us to a slushie cart, manned by a woman who was all smiles and sticky syrup. It might not have been solid food, but I wouldn’t deny myself a sugar high.
A small line had already formed, several children tugging on their parents’ sleeves. My bathing suit clung to my skin uncomfortably. I tried to shift in place, but the air was thick with heat. Aside from seeing my childhood crush half-naked, waking up early hadn’t been the best idea. The sun was high in the sky, my morning shadow disappearing.
The line moved quickly, and before long, the pair of us stood at the front, pondering our choices. Finger resting on her lip in faux-concentration, Miyako made a show of deciding on a flavor “Could I have a mix of wild cherry and blue raspberry, please?”
“Why pretend to chose when you get the same thing every time?” As a woman of few pleasures, I found a great joy in calling Miyako out. Her flush of embarrassment was a rare sight. Turning towards the employee, I order the first flavor to have ‘strawberry’ in its name.
A few minutes later, we found ourselves walking along the shoreline. The waves lapped at our bare feet and we slurped on our slushies, rambling on about anything that came to mind.
“You know,” I said, disrupting the natural lull of conversation, “The last time I drank a slushie like this was before I even met you.”
By now, Miyako’s slushie had melted into a dark purple, the last remnants of red dye staining her lips. “But slushies are, like, a summer staple. What’s up with that?”
I twirled my straw around, savoring the last bits of pink ice that had collected on the bottom of my cup. “Well, my brother would probably make fun of me. He already gives me a hard-enough time about my ice cream addiction; he says sweet things are for children.” Switching voices, I lowered my pitch and curled my arms, much like an ape would at the zoo. In a horrible attempt at mocking my brother, I continued, “ ‘Hikari, sweets bad, protein good. Eat more meat.’”
I took a few more steps before I realized she was no longer beside me. Turning around, I barely had time to register the shocked look on her features before she cried out: “Slushies are not just for kids! Fuck him!” Apparently, my friend took summer treats very seriously.
If her passionate outburst hadn’t of attracted attention, her colorful language sure did. Quickly, I grabbed her arm, hastily pulling her towards our belongings. Embarrassment colored my cheeks as I attempted to dodge the gazes of judgmental bystanders. “Miyako, you can’t just say things like that,” I whispered to her, clenched teeth giving my tone a pinched quality.
“C’mon,” I thrusted her towel into her arms, “let’s get out of here before we get kicked out.”
Pulling on her shorts, she cast me a sideways glance. “I’m sorry, Hika, I didn’t mean to upset you.”
Sighing, I held both of her hands between mine. “You said what you did because you care about me, and I can’t fault you for that.” I gathered up the rest of my own belongings before continuing. “Besides, you forgot to feed me today. I’m thinking we get some McDonald’s. Your treat?”
She laughed, hands now busying themselves with her shirt. “Isn’t McDonald’s for kids?”
Tossing my purse over my shoulder, I turned around and winked. “Fuck society.”
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FMA fanfiction recs!
Hey, so in my recent fma survey, I asked people for FMA fanfiction! And they delivered, yay! Thank you. I decided to make them into a nice list for all to see.
You’re very sweet, Anon but I’m afraid it’s already too late. This ended up quite, quite long. And I’m amazed at how long some of these stories are - if you’re looking for stuff to read, hopefully this list will occupy you for a while, (especially if you check some of the author’s other works).
Most of these I have not read, but hey, they were recced so they’ve got to be good, right? Range of ships and stories from both canons. I’ve included the ships but haven’t included ratings so be warned that some of these may be explicit. (The author will probably indicate it themselves though.)
Full list under cut!
-Fullmetal’s Company by Roseveare | 18434 words | Gen, takes place pre-series. | Ed should have never flashed the silver pocketwatch in a warzone.
-A Wicked Game by Tierfal | 59921 words | RoyEd, Modern!AU | Roy has lucked into the all-expenses-paid vacation of his dreams – all he has to do is convince a bunch of happy couples that he's head-over-heels in love with Ed Elric. What could possibly go wrong?
-Be light from now on by Merel | 2363 words | GreedLing, Modern!AU | “Let’s go inside, sweetheart.” Cat café
-Number 28 by Sevlow | 63347 words | Gen, Parental RoyEd, divergence | As of today, Edward Elric had been missing for four months, two weeks, and five days. Warnings for angst, some gore, and Chimera!Ed.
-In the Gaslight by UnorthodoxCreativity |13542 words | RoyEd | Ed hates military parties. This is no surprise. But when a certain bastard of a colonel takes it into his head to make Ed's night a happier one, well. Ed's not complaining.
-Through the Gate by PreelikesWriting | 3 part series totalling 252736 words | Harry Potter crossover with BH Ed Pre-promised day covering books 5-7 of the HP books. Last part is still incomplete. | Edward is transported to the Wizarding world and must fight his way back home.
-Playing God by the Flamel Cult | 44445 words | Harry Potter crossover | I thought the dull aching was something other than my demise. As it turned out, I was sorely mistaken. Perhaps I should listen to Alphonse more; maybe then there wouldn't be another bloody tragedy that would, inevitably, end it all. For good.
-snipers solve 99% of all problems by silentwalrus | 134066 words | Harry Potter crossover, incomplete post-Promised day | Ed had thought, after the whole Promised Day, homunculus, entire country harvested for alchemical batteries thing, the batshit quotient of his life would have settled down some. He really ought to have topped out the meter with that one. But no. The bullshit is just getting started.“Are you fucking kidding me,” Ed demands. “The wizards?”
-Harry Potter and the Eastern Sage by LiteratureWork | 141609 words | Harry Potter Crossover Brotherhood incomplete | Nicholas Flamel was famous for creating the philosopher's stone, but like Lockhart's smile it was all a lie. Flamel stole a part of the stone and it took Edward 642 years to get it back along with the souls inside of it, one which was his brother. But after traveling to Hogwarts to retrieve it, Dumbledore has other plans for the ancient hero.
-Reversed by Autzulfrost | 162206 words | Harry Potter crossover post 03 anime | At the end of the first anime, Ed is sent back to London. But he's a kid again and through a twist of fate gets involved with the wizarding world. Will the alchemist help save wizarding Britain? Will he find a way to return to his home and true family?
-Stray Hayate by Famousfault | 3436 words| Harry Potter crossover | Hayate had no idea how he had ended up there, but he had no other choice but to accept the situation. Harry at the other hand is not quite as satisfied with it.
-Demon Alchemist by Metisket | Series, 88462 words | Brotherhood divergence covers whole series | Al died in the transmutation. In which Ed becomes Central's local vigilante, thereby becoming Maes's problem. Roy finds something poetic in this.
-No Crueler Punishment by Gomboc123 | 2504 words | Post-promised day humour | Instead of taking away Roy's vision, Truth decides to take something much more precious from Roy, and defaces him in the worst way possible.
-The Bond we Share by DiaHonkers | 23750 words | What if Brotherhood where Ed and Al share a body incomplete | The Fullmetal Alchemist was a weird person. He joined the military at only 12 years old. But the weirder thing about him was that he changed personalities in the blink of an eye. One moment he could be screaming his head off at you and the other he would be profusely apologizing. He would constantly talk to himself, and his commanding officer didn't bat an eye. But what they didn't know that it wasn't just one person. It was two.
-Another Journey by Isil'zha BLZ | 254486 words | Whole series rewrite. | The Elric brothers embark on another journey, but this time it's different than the ones they've been through before. A reimagining of the FMA story that combines elements from both anime to create what is (hopefully) the best of both worlds.
-A boy named Ed by BelloftheSea | 302732 words | Post-canon but Ed is young again without memories of his old life. Incomplete | Ed knew he was different. It wasn't just that he was smarter than the other kids or even that he had automail. No, it had more to do with the way people would occasionally look at him, like they were expecting somebody else. It was the way his mechanic cried the day she met him. It was the way his dad would sometimes slip – and call him Fullmetal.
-Nothing Gold by Rydia Highwind | 23230 words | EdLing Post-canon, AU ending | Ling has gained immortality. Ed has not.
-Unto the Shores of Acheron by LAXgirl | 99904 words | Gen, post 03 AU | Everyone thought Edward was dead. But when someone tries to resurrect him, no one's prepared to deal with the soulless look alike that's created instead, or its hurt and anger when his original half unexpectedly returns from the other side of the Gate.
-Nequitia Est Manus by Azei | 103304 words | Divergence story incomplete | Madame Christmas meets a blonde brat with a fondness for drinking all her whiskey and giving her more headaches than Roy ever did. AU in which Ed fakes his death at the end of episode 26 and uses it as a means to stop Father's plans from the sidelines.
-Beast of a Burden by Shoulderpads | 66416 words | Diverges Pre-canon, BH incomplete | Alternate universe where Ed and Al don't get the chance to try and bring their mom back before they're taken to the labs as subjects for chimera experimentation.
-The Colours of the World by MaiKusakabe | 114228 words | Harry Potter crossover Post Promised day, incomplete | When Roy Mustang went to retrieve his eyesight from Truth, he wasn’t expecting to end up doing a job in exchange. It couldn’t even be an easy job, of course, because Edward’s assessment of Truth was a pretty accurate one.
-Confirmation Bias by Cryogenia | 3327 words | RoyEd vague timeline. | (No summary)
-Phylactery by Shade40 | 250666 words | Post-Promised day AU, incomplete | Six years after the Promised Day, Selim is Homunculus and child. As he studies alchemy, Selim realizes it is possible to resurrect his family. The Homunculi deserve the same second chance that he was given, but while they struggle to embrace their newfound humanity, an unknown player comes with a deal that divides them. Post-FMAB with bits from 2003 series.
-Inhuman Beings by wllw | 3173 words | Mid BH, Pride + Kimblee centric | At the edges of his vision, the shadows followed him.
-The Twelve Days of Disaster by MEOW-I'm-A-Dog | 47932 words | A series of oneshots about Christmas that go from crack to full cocaine. Written on a whim, not to be taken seriously unless you want to. Characters: Breda, Ed, Al, Havoc, Fuery, Hawkeye, Falman, Mustang, Hughes and the occasional Armstrong
-At Gate’s Edge by Winds of Water | 455478 words | RoyEd 03 AU where human transmutation went awry and Ed is a ghost. Incomplete | Love's never easy as it is, but it's twice as hard when you're separated by life and death.
-Grand Arcanum by The-Immortal-Moon | 343781 words | Series AU and roleswap blending 03 and BH. Incomplete | Brothers Edward and Alphonse tragically lose their bodies in a failed attempt at human transmutation. Now, they partner with their childhood friend, Winry, and scour Amestris in search of the Philosopher’s Stone.
-Abandon All Hope, Ye who enter here by Anonymous | 17171 words | Dark! Au from end of 03. Ed being held by Dante. NonCon. | Everything went wrong. Al is gone, Dante has the Stone, and Ed is a prisoner to the fanciful whims of his new captor.
-Love Can Melt the Ice by Winryofresembool | 63640 words | EdWin Modern!Au | Edward Elric, a hockey player from Amestris, participates in his first ever Olympics. The only thing he's planning to get from there is a gold medal. However, when he accidentally bumps into a childhood friend, a talented figure skater Winry Rockbell, he learns there are things bigger than hockey.
-Our Embalmed hearts, our desolate kingdoms by spooky_bee | 155853 words | Neon Genesis Evangelion fusion with FMAB RoyAi | "He leans back, palms connecting with the concrete, and looks up over their city, their desolate kingdom. In the rain, Central City might as well be the ruins of Xerxes, empty and grey, and he and she may as well be the last two people on earth."Or, Love in the Time of Giant Robots
-Talking With Ghosts by em-witchwood | 2801 words | EdRiza, Post FMA 03 | Out of all of them, she was probably the only one that didn’t regret all the things she had never said to him, because she’d said all that she wanted.
-We That Are Young by Stoplight Delight | 277131 words | Pre-canon | It's a well-known fact that innocents make poor soldiers. Fortunately, Riza Hawkeye's childhood was not entirely innocent. She had to grow up fast... though she wasn't the only one. The early years of the Colonel and his First Lieutenant.
-Tempest by Bookwrm389 | 16810 words | Gen, vaguely mid-series Parental RoyEd | Ed is adamant that he doesn't need a father. And it's only when he's about to lose the closest thing he has to one that he understands how very wrong he is.
-Flames of Consequence by EnviousMonster | 67018 words | Gen, Envy lives AU post BH. Incomplete | Where Envy survives and is given a second chance to become something more than they were made to be. Will contain depictions of violence, emotional and mental duress, etc.
-Stock Market Crash by VIKAN | 29301 words | Gen, vaguely canon timeline | Stranded in the middle of the Eastern Desert, Roy Mustang must try to get himself and a concussed Edward across it safely before he completely loses his mind.
-Mendacium by ChaoticClueless | 15558 words | My Hero Academia crossover with BH Ed. Incomplete | Edward didn't want to help Truth. He didn't want to go to a different world to defeat yet another Father. He didn't want to become a vigilante there.He also wanted his brother back. The choice was obvious, even if Truth is a massive asshole.
-Reverti Ad Praeteritum by Batsutousai | 288908 words | EdRoy Timetravel story, BH | Unwillingly forced to serve as a human trial for a crazy alchemist experimenting with time travel, Edward Elric finds himself standing across from Truth in the moment it takes his leg from him. Armed with the knowledge of what's to come and burdened with guilt for the choices he'd made as an adult, Ed sets out to fix every mistake he ever made and save every life they ever lost, no matter what it takes.
-Best Kept Secret by MoonStarDutchess | 523815 words | RoyAi BH canon-compliant incomplete | What if Roy and Riza were secretly married through the entire series? This story tells you that.
-Ash Like Snow by Laora | 6723 words | Harry Potter Crossover | His sanity is crumbling away, but then, so is the entire wizarding world.
-Penance by Laora | 125965 words | Harry Potter Crossover around Promised Day | The Gate was opening; the black arms stretched toward him and Pride. Ed knew he had no say in the matter. He would be pulled to this parallel dimension, alternate universe—whatever it was—and Amestris would be left to die. Truth merely grinned.
-Jiǔ by agentcalliope | 3131 words | Roy-centric piece, RoyAi | the nine steps Roy Mustang takes towards acceptance
-Homefront by hlwim | 50895 words | BH AU, some RoyAi | Miss Riza's arrival in Resembool has the potential to ruin everything.
-Infernia by mitsys | 3899 words | Royai, Pacific Rim AU | Some stories aren't told in headlines or newspapers, but in the touch of hands and minds. They linger together in the Drift, lines melting together into the seams, and they don't mourn the lost letters. They've been writing their story long enough to do it without words.
-Wooden by tobu_ishi | 1928 words | Gen, Post 03 anime, Ed in other world | He never realized how useful automail could be until he was an entire world away from it, or what a pain simple daily tasks could become.
-Mirrorworld by Tramontana Keeper | 305134 words | EdHei, Pre-CoS AU | Ed managed to prove that he was truly from a different world, and Alfons finds himself captive in Ed's dream of opening the Gate.
-Fragile Worlds by The Prettiest Frog in the Pond | 5635 words | Gen, 03 anime AU | He'd been stuck in this place for months now, but no matter what he says, nothing changes. He's Edward Elric. He's been Edward Elric all his life. So why won't they believe him?
-One Foot in by Firewind | 7008 words | Gen, 03 anime AU | Envy shows Ed why it's unwise to break a deal with homunculi.
-The Circle by Elfpen | 3007 words | Gen, promised day | Edward Elric teaches alchemy at Central University. A particularly horrible student leads them down a path of dark discussion, which somehow, leads Edward back full circle.
-Ignis Fatuus by Mikkeneko | 5787 words | Gen. | Edward attempts to break apart a chimera made from an animal and a child.
-Abstention by Asidian | 11117 words | Vague timeline | An assignment to snow country under Colonel Mustang is bad enough for the damper it puts on the Elrics' search for the Stone, but downed supply lines lead to cut rations, and Ed discovers that he can't take the deprivation as well as he'd like to pretend.
-Never break the chain by haganenobeato | 4199 words | RoyAi BH, vague timeline | The nights were not kind to Riza Hawkeye. Sleep felt elusive following the failed operative to capture a homunculus after Gluttony swallowed the Colonel whole with Edward alongside him. Before she could gather her bearings and make sense of what was happening, Mustang’s men were transferred at different cardinal points in Amestris with herself at the center as Bradley’s assistant.As for him… he had been changed.
-Men and Angels by Laora | 56333 words | Timetravel AU | Trisha can't understand; she's terrified, but she has to stay calm. Her boys are gone, replaced by her sons from the future...and something, she knows, is terribly wrong.
-The Really Ridiculously Good Looking Summer Festival by VerboseWordsmith | 45594 words | Modern!Band!AU RoyEd | Quasi-indie newcomers, Fullmetal Alchemist, just hit number one with their second single on the Amestris Hot 100 Rock chart and they've been added to the lineup of this summer's Transmuted Tour.
-To Love is to Sacrifice by Konfessor2U | 6372 words | Edvy, BH | Edward is held captive as a human sacrifice and Envy is set to watch over him.
-Not in His Job Description by alightintheshadows | 1331 words | Gen, BH Post-promised day, Parental Roy | General Mustang receives visitor much too early on a Sunday morning, but he doesn't mind in the slightest.
-Aftermath by Asidian | 32148 words | Elricest, vaguely post-series | Not even a year after Al receives his new body, Ed requests a mission that will take him far from his brother's side. When things go terribly wrong, they must pick up the pieces together.
-Ignis Aurum Probat by writing_addict | 34827 words | How to train your dragon AU, FMAB, incomplete | Edward Elric is born early into the dead of winter, on an island twelve days North of Hopeless and a few degrees south of Freezing-To-Death. He comes into the world sickly and small--and endlessly defiant, burning with the kind of rage that can shake the foundations of the universe. The gods themselves hear that scream, that roar of fury and thunder promising to remake the world as they know it, and wonder. Fifteen years later, Ed brings down the Night Fury that's been plaguing his people for generations, stands over it with the perfect opportunity to make the kill...and spares it.
-Satellite by SpicyReyes | 103170 words | EdRoy, Timetravel, BH incomplete | A rogue alchemist, desperate to restore the alchemy of the famous Fullmetal Alchemist, pushes Truth into playing a new game - one that has Edward Elric waking up on the floor of his house where a transmuted abomination should have been, just in time to save his younger self and brother. He might have a chance to do everything again, now, though...He would never hold anything but bitterness for the title of 'dad,' but maybe an older brother could make things better.
-With Eyes Anew by Rider_of_Spades | 500 words | LustScar FMA 03 | "She’s not your second chance– she’s your first." On the implications of being in love with a Homunculus.
-Son of the Desert by ShanaStoryteller | 10445 words | Ishvalan!Ed AU, BH EdRoy | Every time Edward sees the circle on the back Mustang's hand, he wants to scream, wants to reach across the desk and shake him, wants to wrap his hands around the older man's throat and ask if it was worth it, if this desk and his rank is worth the screaming, crying, writhing, burning bodies of his people-
-Tears and Rain by BeautifulFiction_FMA | 196772 words | RoyEd FMA 03 vague timeline | When Ed stops an assassination attempt on Roy's life, he foils one of the opening moves in a massive military intrigue. Can he and Roy stay one step ahead of those who want them dead, or will they both lose the fight to survive?
-The Lost Language of Swans by Mirabella | 2258 words | Elricest, Wingfic Post-series | They smuggled Al out of Central and back to Rizembul, where they rented a small house with room for Ed's books and Al's wings.
-For the night has been unkind by CoolJellyBean25 | 159980 words | RoyEd PostBH AU, Incomplete | Even with the straitjacket off, Ed never feels like it's really gone.
-conflicted by the very air i breathe by writing_addict | 149707 words | some RoyAi, BH AU, incomplete | Edward Elric vanishes after what was supposed to be an ordinary mission. A year later, Roy Mustang gets a call that changes everything.
-World without Roy by Manalfedz | 41482 words | Gen, BH AU, incomplete | Wherein...Roy tries not to freak out in an alternate world where everything has gone horribly wrong.
-A sudden alchemy by LadyMerlin | 5388 words | RoyEd Modern!Au | The one in which Roy is a Knight in Shining Armour
-A Pyramid Scheme by PhantomRose96 | 1662 words | Gen, immediately Post!BH | “Why didn’t you run?” “Sorry?” “Why didn’t you run away, Fullmetal?”
-From Ashes by JordannaMorgan | 22864 words | Gen, canon-compliant set right after the human transmutation attempt. | Edward and Alphonse had a long journey to make before they ever left home.
-Babylon by BeautifulFiction_FMA | 261096 words | RoyEd, post FMA 03 AU | Two years after retrieving his brother's body from the Gate of Truth Edward Elric is still paying the price. Will his debt ever be repaid, or will it finally cost him everything?
-Havoc’s Foolproof Plan by 1stTimeCaller | 9187 words | vague timeline, some RoyAi shiptease. | Havoc's love life is constantly interrupted by his womanizing boss. So he decides to try it on with the one woman who is immune to Mustang's charm.
-The Ordeal of Being Known by budgeWrites | 20254 words | FMA 03 AU LustScar Lust and Scar both live, Incomplete | On conquering demons, remembering how to live, and coming home.
-Focus by Sevlow | 37665 words | Gen, vague timeline | Mustang, Edward, and all the other Alchemists of fair Amestris are starting to lose their grip on their own minds and bodies. The Amestrian military is in chaos as dozens of its higher-ranking officers start losing their minds to an unknown sickness.
#fma#fullmetal alchemist#fma 03#fmab#fma 2003#fma fanfiction#fanfiction#fanfic recs#wow there's a lot here#you guys recced so many!#thanks so much!#there's all sort of ships here#I've made a point to mark them out
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Catch Me If You Can (16/?)
298 days. That’s how long Killian Jones was away from a baseball field. It’s less than a year, only part of a season for him, but it might as well have lasted a decade as he alternated between physical therapy and spending an excessive amount of time sitting on his couch.
But then he came back and won the World Series.
It’s something no one saw coming, and it’s certainly not something anyone who knows about his arm would predict. Now it’s a new season with new possibilities, and anything could happen. On-field reporter Emma Swan will be there to cover it all even if she is not his biggest fan right now.
Asking her out live on-air will do that.
Rating: Mature
A/n: If you like, read, kudo, comment, tag flail, reblog, or anything else, I see you, and I appreciate you! Honestly, it’s the coolest thing how many of you are out there, and every time I find out someone else has been reading, my heart grows Grinch style ❤️
We’re off to London in this chapter and the next one! Fun fact: the Yankees and Red Sox really did play a series in London this year!
AO3: Beginning | Current
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Tag list: @xellewoods @galaxyzxstark @eala-captian @mariakov81 @ultraluckycatnd @royalswan @shey-starsfury @sals86 @iam2307 @ashley-knightingale @karenfrommisthaven @scientificapricot @captswanis4vr @ultimiflos @jamif @idristardis @nikkiemms @resident-of-storybrooke @tiganasummertree @bmbbcs4evr @onceuponaprincessworld @jennjenn615 @mayquita @captainsjedi @teamhook @notoriouscs @kmomof4 @ekr032-blog-blog @cs-forlife @andiirivera @jonirobinson64 @qualitycoffeethings @thejollyroger-writer
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“This is weird,” Will mutters as they walk the unfamiliar hallways of London Stadium on their way out to the field to practice. “I’m not used to being unfamiliar with a place where we’re about to play, and I swear that I’m still jet-lagged. Why did they think we were going to get used to the time change in one day?”
Instinctively, Killian wants to get onto Will about complaining since that’s become his thing as of late, but every point that he’s made is valid. It’s weird to be in a place that he doesn’t know. He’s familiar enough with half of the baseball stadiums in America to be able to give a tour like he made the blue prints for them, but they are decidedly not in America.
They’re in London.
To play the Red Sox.
So. Fucking. Cool.
His job awards him more opportunities than he ever could have dreamed about as a kid from Ohio, and while he’s had the opportunity to travel to Mexico and Canada, he’s never been overseas like this. He meant to go years ago, but then the accident happened and all of his plans went down the drain. He could have gone then too. He had all of the time in the world on his hands, and he squandered it by sitting on his ass and not traveling or doing all of the other things he’s always wanted to do.
He’ll have all the time in the world when he’s retired.
Woah, no. That’s not happening anytime soon, and he is not going down that road when things are going so well right now.
They’re going to kick some Red Sox ass even while in England.
His family didn’t fly all the way over here on vacation just for them to lose. Addy and Lucy would be very disappointed in him if they did because he knows for a fact that they only care about being here for the baseball and Addy’s birthday party tomorrow.
All of the cool kids turn six in London, obviously, and Addison Jones is the coolest of the kids.
It’s all she’s been talking about for weeks now, going on and on about how she was going to have an English birthday party and be English like Peppa Pig and Meghan Markle. He didn’t have the heart to tell her that Peppa Pig is animated and that Meghan Markle was technically American first, but some things kids just don’t have to know. All she knows is that a real-life prince and his wife are going to be at the game today, and she thinks that’s the coolest thing in the world.
It kind of is even if he had to study a protocol list for when he met them earlier in the locker room.
Killian’s life is so goddamn weird, but he loves it.
The fact that Emma got to travel here as well, even if she’s not doing on-camera coverage and is simply here as a print journalist for the team, makes it all the better. He may not get to see her on-field during the game, but he’ll see her afterwards.
Hopefully.
They haven’t been here long, but it’s already difficult to find time away from his family to see her, even if it’s only for a moment.
He’d give anything to have those little moments.
“I have no idea,” Killian yawns, finally responding to Will as they push the doors open and walk out to the field. He can tell that the set-up is going to throw him off, the way the stadium is equal on every side, and that the AstroTurf feels odd below his feet. But that’s why they practice. “We’ll suffer through it, and drink lots and lots of coffee.”
“I think they drink tea over here.”
“I believe that they drink coffee too. You want to start in the outfield and work our way back in?”
“Yeah, that’s fine.”
The two of them are quiet as they take it all in and try to get used to this new place. Music blares over the speakers, and the rest of the team filters in and out as they go through their warm-ups. He’s not sure if he really needs coffee for how hyped up he is to be here and to be playing their biggest rivals, and the crash of caffeine always seems so inevitable. The crash of adrenaline, not so much. Most of the time.
It’s a quick warm-up, one that doesn’t extend too much effort on his part, and his shoulder is feeling loose after the massage Archie gave it. They’ve won each of their series against the Sox so far this season, and he doesn’t plan on that changing now. When they finally travel to Boston next month, sure. But not today.
No part of him should be thinking this, especially with how unreliable his arm can be, but they’re playing so well this season that he can’t imagine them not making the playoffs and then being in the final two.
They could be back-to-back World Series Champions.
But that’s very much counting his chickens before they hatch, and that always leads to disappointment.
He simply can’t go there even if his brain keeps trying to.
“You guys make any wedding plans yet?” he asks Will as they walk back infield to practice a few pitches on the mound.
“We’ve been engaged for exactly a week, so no, we haven’t made any official plans. Belle has all of these ideas, though, and she’s been talking through them with her parents. Honestly, I think we may get married in December or January of this year since she doesn’t want to do it during the season.”
Killian nods his head in agreement as he tucks his chain back into his uniform from where it had fallen out. “That makes sense. It’s always hell trying to plan anything during the season. Even making dinner plans can be difficult.”
“Well,” Will says, clicking his tongue, “it’s not like you have anyone to be going out to dinner with. We don’t count. Neither does Liam.”
A protest is on the tip of his tongue, but he can’t say anything, not yet. He and Emma are going to talk about that after this trip, and even if they do, he’s not sure he’ll be able to tell Will. He should. Will and Robin. And Eric and Ariel. But no one else on the team. It’s just too risky.
That might put a damper in his plan to kiss her before every game.
But the time will come. It has to. And baby steps are fine with him when they mean that steps are happening. He completely and totally understands Emma and her reasons for not wanting their relationship out in the open, and he agrees. It’s better for her, for both of them, and they’ve only been together for two months. In the grand scheme of things, that’s not that long. It doesn’t matter that he fell hard and fast. That doesn’t escalate things.
It just…complicates his feelings.
This thing won’t be hidden away forever, not if they want any kind of future, and while he’d never presume to speak for Emma, he damn well intends to have that future.
“I could be dating,” Killian scoffs at Will who only rolls his eyes in response. “What? I could.”
“Nothing,” Will shrugs, taking position behind home plate. “I’m just saying, for a man who everyone thinks is going home with a new woman every night, you are particularly lacking in the women department.”
His jaw ticks, and he’s not even sure why. He’s never minded talking about his relationships in the past, not to Will, but it’s probably the lie. Of course it’s the lie.
“And what’s wrong with that?”
“Nothing,” Will grunts as he throws the ball back to him, a light thwacking sound hitting his glove. “Do whatever the hell you want. I’m not someone to tell you what to do with your life. I’m just saying, I’m much happier having Belle be a part of my life.”
“Look at you being all sweet.”
“I have my moments.”
“I’m totally giving a speech at your wedding about the night that I kept you from throwing up on her.”
“I would have expected nothing less from you. In fact, I’ve already warned Belle. It was in my proposal speech.”
“Shut up, you asshole.”
“Never. I know you love the sound of my voice.”
“It is rather dreamy.”
“You two are talking too much to be practicing,” Eric huffs as walks toward them with his bat in hand, fiddling with it the slightest bit. “What are we talking about?”
“Killian’s lack of a love life.”
Eric grunts at that, eyes scanning between the two of them. “That sounds like a conversation that I don’t want to be in because Ariel will somehow know and insist we talk about it later. She’ll have you set up on ten blind dates before midnight.”
“It’s in my contract that she can’t meddle in my dating life.”
“Really?” Eric and Will ask at once, their eyes going wide.
“No,” Killian chuckles as he stretches out his shoulder and bends his legs a bit, squatting down to stretch out some more, “but sometimes I wish that it was. Where has she been all day, by the way?”
“She’s helping set up Addison’s birthday party for tomorrow, apparently. She’s somehow gotten them a separate suite here, and they’re doing some sort of tea party during the game. You have even been given express permission to sit with your family instead of in the dugout with us.”
Of course. He could have done that anyways, but leave it to Ariel to make sure that there is no way in hell that he’s missing his niece’s sixth birthday party. She is pure magic, that woman.
“Your wife is something else,” he chuckles, deciding to step closer to them so that he doesn’t have to shout, “but you guys know that Addy is fully going to expect all of you to show up at some point.”
“Her present is in my suitcase.” Will smiles as he says it with a slight shake of his head. “I could never forget my biggest fan since Roland seems to betray me on who his favorite player is every week.”
Killian clicks his tongue. “Eh, just to be clear, I’m Addison’s favorite player. I’m not letting you steal that title from me.”
-/-
Killian spots Emma sitting nine rows up behind third base when they’re in the second inning.
She’s wearing a jersey…his jersey, and when he notices it, he nearly pegs Johnson with a ball.
Holy fuck.
It sends blood straight to his groin, and the only thing that stops it is him thinking about Emma making a joke about him having a boner on the mound. She’s so ridiculously funny in her bad jokes, and it brings a smile to his face that he has to control as he focuses on the game. He can’t be losing it when he’s in the middle of a game.
But damn. His girlfriend is wearing his jersey, his name and number printed on the back, and she’s got a baseball cap pulled low over her forehead with her blonde ponytail sticking out behind her. He wouldn’t have recognized her if he didn’t know every inch of her body.
He’ll play in London every day of the week if it means Emma can watch as a semi-spectator without anyone recognizing her.
A bloody siren. That’s what she is.
-/-
They win that night.
-/-
After the game when Emma walks into the locker room, her phone in hand for questions, she’s not wearing the jersey anymore. It’s been removed, and she’s wearing a black blouse that’s low cut enough that he can see the slightest bit of the cups of her bra. He’d bet that she didn’t think through having to remove his jersey when she got dressed, but he doesn’t mind how she looks.
He never does.
(She wore his fucking jersey.)
Except he can’t do anything about it but smile and answer her questions as well as everyone else’s. It’s a bit odd for her to not have Jeff following her around with the camera, but he knows that this means she’ll be writing an article instead. She’s always loved that.
Once all of the press members ask their questions, most of them British journalists, they filter out of the locker room, leaving everyone to strip out of their uniforms and move to take a shower. He’s taking off his belt when Arthur speaks, and his fingers still over the leather.
“I don’t know how any of us aren’t fucking Emma,” he grumbles, and the words make disgust drip down Killian’s spine. “Have you seen her body? I bet she’s fucking amazing in bed. I’d fuck her in a heartbeat. Damn am I glad women work in baseball now.”
The room goes silent, every man stopping what he’s doing, and Killian has words on the tip of his tongue but can’t say anything because Will is already talking.
“Fuck off, King,” Will curses, throwing his gear down on the ground. “I mean, seriously. What the bloody fuck? How shitty do you have to be to talk about someone like that? I knew you were an ass, but God, that’s next level. First of all, you’re fucking married, and even if you weren’t, that woman is a human being. You don’t get to talk about her like that.”
“Oh, come on, man. We’re all thinking it. Did you see her boobs just now? It’s nothing to get riled up about.”
“Yeah, yeah it is,” Will huffs as he crosses his arms over his chest. “The fact that you don’t realize that is just plain sad. She’s not coming in here to get ogled by you. She’s coming in here to do her job, and she’s damn good at it.”
Arthur rolls his eyes, and Killian’s blood boils even more. “Jones asked her out. How is that not the same thing?”
“Because he didn’t ask her out because he thinks of her as a sex object,” Will spits all the while Killian can barely hear any of this from the way his heart is thumping between his ears, a drum beat that’s louder than anything he’s ever heard.
Arthur darkly chuckles, and it’s that sound that has the drumline stopping so that his eyes snap over across the room. Killian didn’t even realize that he was clenching his fists, but when he looks down, he can see the red imprints of blood from where his nails were digging into his skin.
“Jones,” Arthur yells, “aren’t you going to back me up here? Isn’t she a fine piece of ass?”
“Shut the fuck up,” Killian yells before standing from the seat in his locker, quickly striding across the room until he and Arthur are eye-to-eye and completely lined up. Arthur’s got this disgusting cocky grin on his face, one that makes unpleasant chills run down his spine, and it’s taking everything in him not to punch the ever-loving shit out of the man. “Will is right. You’re an asshole, and you can’t be talking about her that way.”
“Why do you care so much? What, are you fucking her?”
And that’s when his first rises and slams into Arthur’s jaw, a sting spreading through his knuckles and up to his elbow. The drum starts beating in his head again, his heart pumping blood through him faster than normal, and everything is a blur as he moves his head to dodge Arthur’s punch and as someone grabs onto elbows and pulls him back and out of the room all the while a screaming match goes on in the locker room, every word muted to him except for the one name that keeps getting repeated.
Emma.
“Are you insane?” Robin gasps, and when Killian looks around, he can see that he’s been pulled off to the weight room that they’re using in this stadium. He didn’t even know Robin was in the locker room at the time. “You can’t punch Arthur no matter how big of an asshole he is. You’re going to fuck up your arm, and you can get suspended for weeks.”
“I don’t really care about either of those things right now.”
“Well you should,” Robin huffs, running his hands through his hair as he paces back and forth over the carpeted floor. “He’s an asshole. We all know that, and I wanted to punch him too…but you just can’t, mate. He’ll get his due, and it won’t come at the cost of your career.”
Robin is right. Robin is always right, but how is he supposed to sit there and let Arthur talk about his girlfriend like that? How is he supposed to let him talk about any woman like that? He simply can’t, and even though his knuckles hurt like hell right now and Archie is most definitely going to kill him, he doesn’t regret it. He can’t, and he’d bet that Will doesn’t either.
“Fuck,” Killian mutters, sitting down on a weight bench and burying his face in his hands as he tries to flex some of his fingers out. “Dammit. This isn’t how today was supposed to go. I’m not supposed to be punching our outfielder in a locker room in fucking London. I’m supposed to be enjoying my time and sipping tea at my niece’s birthday party because I’m this good guy that she looks up to when really everyone is a piece of shit.”
“Dramatic much?”
“Shut up.”
“Never,” Robin laughs as the door opens and Al stumbles inside, his long dark hair pushed back behind his ears and his tanned skin painted red in what Killian hopes is a sunburn and not anger.
“What the hell, Jones?” Al screeches, waling right up to him so that the tips of their shoes touch. “You punched King? With your right arm? What is going on in that head of yours?”
Killian groans, already ready to have his ego bruised and his career kicked by a man who is only four years older than him, and he straights his back so that Al isn’t look down at him as much as he should be.
“Are you in here to suspend me?”
Al’s brows furrow together. “What? No. Why would I suspend you?”
“Because I punched Arthur?”
Al waves him away, backing up the slightest bit. “No, I’m not going to suspend you for that. King can be a piece of shit sometimes, and I heard some of the stuff he was saying. He deserved that. My team are not going to be a bunch of sexist assholes who talk about our reporters that way. I can’t guarantee that there won’t be some kind of league suspension, but I doubt King takes it anywhere since then he’s had to explain the stuff he was saying.”
“Then why are you yelling at me?”
“Because you punched someone with your pitching arm, and I can’t have you messing up your arm again. Go see Archie right now, and get some damn ice on the thing.”
“Aye, aye, Captain,” Killian mock salutes, his head still spinning with everything that’s happened in the past fifteen minutes.
He takes it back. His life isn’t weird. It’s batshit crazy.
-/-
Ariel has been yelling at him in his hotel room for the past fifteen minutes. This is after Liam and Elsa yelled at him for twenty minutes, each, and he’s so damn tired of having to listen to this. He’s aware of the fact that he could have messed up part of his season today, but he still doesn’t regret it. He could have made better choices, yes, but Arthur deserved it. And he’s fine. He’ll probably only have a slight bruise. The only significant damage is the fact that their already frayed relationship that only truly exists because they’re teammates and his wife is friends with Ariel is pretty much destroyed now. That’s fine with him. He doesn’t want anything to do with the asshole.
And he has no idea what he’s going to tell Emma about this. His knuckles have cuts and bruises on them already, his fingers aching when he stretches them out, and if she comes to his room tonight, there’s no way in hell she’s not going to notice.
Maybe he should cancel on her.
He doesn’t want to cancel on her.
He wants to spend time with her and simply be in her company, maybe even get to figure out the subway routes (or should he call them the underground here?) and find a secluded place to go out to dinner. But he’s got to explain his hand, and he’s really not sure how lying is going to go here.
Lying to Emma really isn’t his best idea, so he most likely shouldn’t do it.
“Are you even listening to me, KJ?” Ariel huffs, stopping her pacing and placing her hands on her hips. “You look like you’re not listening.”
“I’m not.” She reaches up to slap the back of his hand, but he grabs her wrist to stop her, putting it back by her side. “I’ve heard all of it before, okay? And I’m going to hear it again. I know, I know, I fucking know. It was dumb, but I couldn’t stand by and listen to that. Will couldn’t either, but he’s got enough brains to know better than to punch someone.”
“That is not a sentence I ever thought you would say.”
“Life is funny like that,” Killian chuckles before falling back against his hotel bed. Whoever is booking their hotel rooms this year obviously has no sense of a budget because he hasn’t had a roommate once. It’s glorious. “A, I have no idea why you care about me so much. I’m such a pain in your ass.”
“Yeah,” Ariel sighs, sitting down next to his shoulder on the bed so that she can look over at him, her red hair framing her face, “you are, but I love you, so I don’t mind too much. And you give me something to focus on other than my idiot husband.”
“Please, you and Eric have one fight a year, and it lasts about five minutes.”
“I’ll have you know that we fought just yesterday over what to have for dinner. It was a real battle. I nearly punched him, but I had enough sense to stop myself.”
His eyes roll, but he can feel the smile stretching across his lips as he twists his head to look at Ariel. “I love you too, by the way. You and Elsa and Anna are pretty much the three sisters I never had. And you’re much nicer to me than Liam ever was.”
“Please, Liam is your hero.”
“Yeah, but when I was eight and he was sixteen, I was not his favorite person in the world. I think you guys would have been much nicer to me.”
Ariel’s lips flatten as she nods her head, sarcasm practically penned across the lines on her forehead. “Sure, sweetie. That’s what would have happened. Are you okay?”
“Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?” She simply arches her brow. “Oh, yeah, I’m fine. Just a shitty afternoon. As long as I don’t get yelled at anymore, I think I’ll be perfect and ready to go for Addy’s birthday party tomorrow. Thanks for setting that up, by the way. I think you may actually be magic for how you convince people to do your bidding.”
“I know,” she says, a grin plastered on her lips. “I’m pretty much the best. Do you want to come and get dinner with me and Eric?”
“Raincheck on that one?”
“I’m holding you to that this time,” Ariel sighs, patting his shoulder before she rises from the mattress. “Keep putting ice on your hand, and doing your stretches. We’ve got a long season ahead of us, and you are not allowed to mess it up.”
“Understood, love. Have fun at dinner. Feel free not to yell at me tomorrow even though I know that you will.”
Ariel waves him away before picking up her purse and walking out the door while he stays stretched out on his mattress, wondering if he can convince whoever owns this hotel to send this mattress and these sheets to his apartment because it’s glorious. Maybe it’s not really and it’s simply the fact that he’s still jetlagged and has had an extremely long day, but he doubts it.
This is the best comforter in the world.
And he’s never going to move from it.
So, of course, there’s a knock on his hotel door. Of course.
Groaning, he pulls himself up to rise from the bed, the muscles in his backing aching the slightest bit, and steps over to the door, checking the peephole and finding Emma on the other side. He should have known, and honestly, of all of the people seeking him out tonight, she is his favorite.
Until he opens the door, lets her inside, and the first thing that she does is hit him in the chest.
What the hell?
“What the hell?” Emma fumes, echoing his thoughts. “You punched Arthur King today?”
Bloody hell.
Bloody hell? Is he British now? How long has he been using that phrase and hasn’t even realized it? This is what he gets for hanging out with Robin so much.
“Aye,” he sighs as his unbruised hand immediately goes up to scratch behind his ear. She doesn’t look angry, the same soft smile that’s usually painted on her face still there, but there’s fire behind the green of her eyes. “How do you know about that?”
“Belle told me.”
He arches a brow. “Belle?”
“Yeah, I ran into her when I was leaving the stadium, and we got to talking and she starts telling me all about you and Will getting into a fight with Arthur over me. I mean, seriously, Killian. How could you be so dumb to punch him? You’re lucky you didn’t fuck up your arm and that you aren’t getting sanctions against you.”
He should really start putting money on how many times he can be told that in one night. He’s betting at least once more tonight and then seven times tomorrow.
“Swan, I know, okay? I promise you I’ve already had my head chewed off about this enough times. I get it, but he was being an asshole and deserved it. Will confronted him first going on and on about how he was a sexist pig, and then Arthur brought me into it by asking how him talking about wanting to fuck you was any different than me asking you out on a date. Then I told him to stop, which only escalated into him asking you if I’m defending you because I’m fucking you. And obviously, I am, but that’s not why I was defending you. He doesn’t get to say shit like that about anyone, but especially not you.”
He releases a breath when he finishes his ramble, which is really only an abbreviated version of the events, but he’s going to lose his mind if he has to go through it one more time. Seriously. But the way Emma’s mouth keeps opening and closing, the right words obviously not coming to her, has him rethinking this and starting from the beginning. It’s not pretty, but she deserves to know.
“You, Killian Jones,” she laments, stepping closer to him and wrapping her arms around his waist in an unexpected move so that he can smell the vanilla of her perfume, “are an idiot asshole who I’m still very much mad at for messing with your hand like that, but I’m also thankful that you and Will didn’t let someone talk about me like that. I’ve been through so much like that already, and I’m glad I have you guys on my side.”
“You have everyone else in that locker room on your side, love,” he says as her rubs his hands up and down her back and rests his chin against her temple, twisting his head to the side so that he can press his lips into her hair. “Me most of all. Then Will, I’ve discovered today, and everyone else is somewhere in there, rankings improving as long as I’m always at the top.”
“You’re so stupid,” she laughs into his chest, the vibrations of it running through him.
“I’ve gotten that a lot today, but you obviously like me a little bit since I saw you wearing my jersey.”
Emma pulls back from the hug to look up at him, a bit of red painting her cheeks. “So, you saw that, did you?”
“I did. I have an eagle eye for my biggest fan.”
“I like you a lot, but I don’t think that I’m your biggest fan. Your nieces have me beat. I didn’t know tomorrow was Addy’s birthday.”
“Aye,” he smiles, fingers inching up her back and tugging her closer to him, “she is turning six, and Ariel has arranged for her to have a tea party in one of the suites separate from the team suites. You should come with me.”
“Killian.” The way she says his name has all of his hope deflating, and he immediately dips his head down to run his lips across the apple of her cheek while his thumbs rub circles into her lower back. “I can’t. You know that.”
“You can. You don’t have to come as my girlfriend. You can simply come as part of the team. I’ll say I ran into you in the hallway or something and insisted that you come along. Come on,” he begs, finally kissing her lips, lingering a moment too long for it to be chaste, “come with me. It’ll be a fun time, and you can meet my family without any of the pressure of meeting them as my girlfriend.”
“But I will be meeting them as your girlfriend.”
“They don’t know that.”
“I’m not sure how that makes me feel. I know I want to meet your family and for you to meet mine. It was my idea and all, but now that the reality is in front of me, I think I might need some more time.” She pulls back from him, releasing his waist and trailing her fingers along his arms until Emma’s holding his hands, soft thumb tracing over the rough parts of his knuckles as her brows furrow together. She’s inspecting to him, and nerves rile in his stomach until she looks up at him with a sympathetic smile. “Can I think on it tonight at least? I don’t have a present for Addy.”
Killian shrugs. “We can sneak out and go buy her something, or,” he twines their fingers together and tugs her toward the bed, “we can spend a little time in here with you on your back because it really wouldn’t make sense for you to have a present if you weren’t technically planning on coming to the party.”
“Watching TV?”
“Sure. We can keep it on while I fuck you with the image of you wearing nothing but my jersey playing in my mind.”
Emma laughs, something loud and boisterous, and he’s never been quite so thankful for the way that she enjoys his flirting. “I mean, that is the most typical athlete thing I’ve ever heard in my life, but we could always make it a reality.”
“Really now?”
“Mhm,” she hums, backing up into the mattress and sitting down, “but only because I liked the way you looked today when you realized I was wearing it. Plus, you defended me and all like a good human being, and I like good human beings.”
And I love you, he wants to say, but doesn’t, biting his tongue while he leans over her, hovering just above her face so that she blinks several times while looking up at him, her bottom lip tugged between her teeth.
“Well, only if you insist.”
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