I'm tired of wanting more, I think I'm finally worn

Steve Harrington gives me Beach Boys vibes

Like. Steve's a little neutral on pop; he doesn't hate it, but it's not usually his first choice. But like a lot of kids, his musical exploration begins with his parents' collection

He finds his mom's Beach Boys albums when he's about twelve, a little after they start leaving on longer trips and he starts poking around the house because he's bored and alone. He can sort of remember his mom playing them when he was really young, can remember her dancing around the kitchen and being silly in ways she usually isn't

He starts playing the Beach Boys when his parents are gone, just sometimes, because the songs have a pretty good beat and the lyrics are fun and it makes him feel a little less lonely. He's got one playing one evening when his parents get home earlier than expected; his dad just shoots him a look at tells him to "turn down the damn racket" (which Steve does, quickly) before stalking up to his office, but his mom stands in the living room doorway, just watching him for a moment

It's the first time in a long time he remembers her just sitting down with him, smiling, laughing, listening to the music with him. She tells him about the first time she heard the band on the radio, and about how she'd gone out to buy their album the very next day. She tells him that his dad had called in to the local station more than once to request "Barbara Ann" because he knew it was her favorite (Steve can't imagine his dad doing anything like that, but he guesses his mom would know better than he does). She tells him that when he was little, too little to really remember, he would ask her to play "the surfing song," even though she was pretty sure he had no idea what surfing was

They don't do it again, but Steve holds onto the memory

He keeps playing the albums. He gets them on tape, when he happens to see them, and then he can play them in his car when the mood strikes. He wouldn't call himself a fan, exactly, but he doesn't have a better word for it. He ends up memorizing a lot of the lyrics, and finds that he doesn't mind having that knowledge at all

December of '85, the first holiday season Steve and Robin spend together, Robin is ready to tease Steve mercilessly for not only knowing all the words to "Little Saint Nick," but for singing along with it while standing at the counter of Family Video. In public. Steve takes it with good grace, but he also makes sure she also knows all the words by the end of their shift. They sing it together every time it comes on the overhead speakers after that

(Steve gets the feeling Robin's enjoyment is half ironic, but he doesn't mind. Her joy as she sings is sincere, and that's the important part)

Robin isn't the last convert he manages to induct, either

"Kokomo" comes out in '88, and Eddie wants to hate it. Really he does. It's really not his speed, he doesn't like surf music, but he just - he can't quite bring himself to dislike it. Not when Steve is listening to it on the radio in the kitchen, singing along, dancing around unselfconsciously while he does the dishes (moving his hips in ways Eddie does not want to associate with the Beach Boys)

But of course, the second Steve catches Eddie listening with anything other than disdain, it's all over. He turns all his attention on Eddie, singing to him, trying to beckon him into the kitchen to dance with him while Eddie valiantly tries to hold out against the fucking dork-ass romantic he's been dating for over a year

Steve points him and then curls his fingers in a "come hither" gesture as he croons along with the radio, telling Eddie to "come on, pretty mama," and Eddie has to let his head hang back while he tells Steve "I hate you," just so Steve won't see how hard he's smiling

He does end up dancing, his head resting on Steve's shoulder because he's laughing too hard to hold it up on his own, his eyes watering while Steve continues being ridiculous just for him

(It is absolutely not their song, but many years later, it does end up on Eddie's carefully curated wedding playlist. He disavows all knowledge of how it got there)

seventeen, boyfriend headcanons ⋆ ﹕₊˚ things about dating jeon wonwoo !

a/n: boy do i love me some BOYFRIEND!WONU!!! if we're talking about a long-term, sweet boyfriend who adores and supports you until the end of time? i'm thinking of this man. word count: 0.4k genre: fluff wonwoo would take personal responsibility for keeping your hands warm in the winter. if you're out and about, he'd slip your joined hands into his coat pocket while offering his spare glove for your other hand. sometimes it isn't as deliberate. sometimes, you and wonwoo would be sitting on the couch, watching tv or otherwise, when his hand would inevitably reach out to take yours. maybe he's just looking for little ways to be a little closer to you. when your hand is cold to his touch, he'd bring your hand up towards him, pressing your fingertips to his lips and shifting to hold your palm to his warm cheek. it doesn't take long for him to realize what he's doing, but he's still left feeling a bit shy nonetheless. in his embarrassment, your hand would leave his as he opts for pulling you towards him, wanting to hide his face in your hair or shoulder to escape any teasings from you. notoriously known as the one who is the worst at sharing, wonwoo finds that his significant other is his lovely exception. like a child, he pulls his food out of harm's way when another member asks for a bite, but with you, he's more than willing to share the first bite. if he's the one to take the first bite, it's just so he can ensure the quality of the dish before making a little portion for you to try, too! seungkwan calls it favoritism, but wonwoo couldn't care less. it just makes him so happy seeing you happy. he greatly values the concept of sharing your lives together. since you cannot be together all the time, you guys keep each other updated through random photos and clips that you take throughout the day. it doesn't have to incredibly interesting or mind-blowing, but it's the effort that makes his heart sing. he loves getting photos of your view from your desk or of the tree that you saw on your way to work. am i convinced that he'd collect these photos to curate into an album to gift to you for an anniversary? YEP! in the same way, he also loves hearing you talk. allowing him to be there while you're indulging in your own musings is his favorite way to feel more connected to you. you could go off on tangents in the middle of your ramblings and sweet wonwoo would just thoughtfully hum along in vague agreement, maybe offering a question every once in a while to let you know that he's still listening. even if he doesn't initially understand a thing about the intricacies of your job or favorite hobby, he still loves being included in the conversation. he would remember random little facts that you told him weeks ago, catching you both off guard and giving you both a good laugh!

hcs of poly relationship with abby and ellie please ilysm 🙌🙌

abby anderson x reader x ellie williams headcanons

suggestive content below the cut

╭ thank you anon for the idea, i hope you enjoy !

╰╮the absolute best dance partners, on adult night at the bar they’ll have you in daze from how much they want to be seen with you. twirling you into the others arms until your legs are sore and the entire bar as their eyes on the three of you. 

╰╮abby hates cooking but ellie loves it. So most days ellie will take on the responsibility of cooking and abby will happily oblige to every desire she has as long as it’s not having anything to do with the stove. On that topic, neither of them can bake- but you can. So most days in the kitchen are filled with ellie instructing abby on what she needs and the three of you bumping into each other as you tackle different tasks. Hoping from dinner, to dishes, to baking- but you all somehow make it work (with tons of kisses in between traffic jams)

╰╮clothes troubles? always. between massive loads of laundry to abby’s shirts getting snatched by you and ellie alike- there is always a fuss about clothes. Whilst abby doesn’t mind her girls stealing her shirts, it becomes a tad problematic when the only shirts left in the closet are ones that would look like compression T’s on her. Secretly, though she gives the two of you shit, she loves it. 

╰╮ellie loves taking photos. It’s something she’s very adamant about, every birthday or anniversary, she has the polaroid camera out snapping multiple pictures to frame or stick into an album. You’d become very fond of it after she’d gone through her collection- showing off every sweet photo she had of the three of you. Including more than a couple of joel and jerry hanging out. (they weren’t aware of their picture being taken, but that made it all the better.) 

╰╮you’d never patrol alone again; constantly having the two women at your side to face weather was beyond the wall- not trusting anyone else with the job of protecting you. You could argue and even attempt to sneak out alone, but they somehow always knew and swooped in at the last minute to accompany you. 

╰╮joel and jerry become the father figures you never got to have, taking great pride in the fact that their daughters could manage to snag a prize like you (jerry’s words, quote me on it.) they loved you unconditionally and though the idea at first was a little weird to them, once they saw how much love the three of you carried for one another- they knew it was something meant to be. 

╰╮so many records. ellie prefers jazz and bluegrass (getting most of her preferences from joel), while abby is a complete opposite listening to 90’s rock and college rock (which had grown to be one of her favorite genres). anytime you all went on a run, you’d pick up all the music you could to bring home and listen to together. It had become a ritual. 

╰╮an affinity for children to randomly be running around your shared house. Some days it was yara and lev sitting on the couch chatting about who knows what, others it was half a dozen tiny children running from ellie and dina as they chased them through the house and out into the garden where they’d indulge them with the patch of strawberries that had just started to ripen. It never bothered you, not one bit. 

╰╮abby is the big spoon, ellie is the little spoon, and you are the littlest spoon. like a little conga train, you three melted together like this most nights. other times, it was just a massive pile of limbs and sheets tangled into something joel had a-likened to the rat king. He thought he was very funny for that, giving abby a playful nudge as he recalled her horror story. 

╰╮kissies galore ! ! neither abby or ellie knew how to not kiss you (or each other) so at the worst moments they’ll press a quick kiss to your lips before moving along to whatever it was they were doing. It always warmed your heart but caught whoever you were with off guard (especially if they didn’t know your situation). 

╰╮long, long, long sessions. sex was an all night affair to the three of you, that way you all had a chance to give each other the love you’d set aside for them. luckily for you, abby and ellie learned how to share when it came to you so it was no longer a fight for dominance but a shared experience. give and take. It took them awhile to figure out a way to combine forces but once they did it was game over for you (and your poor legs the next day.) 

╰╮constant talk of starting a family. abby and ellie loved the idea of having little mini versions of themselves running around, not to mention how willing you were to carry babies for them if they weren’t comfortable with it. when the baby fever got too bad, the three of you would take a trip to the school to volunteer your time- helping the girls become more comfortable with children before you all made the jump to actually having your own. 

more thoughts on boyfriend mick🥹pls (fluffy and maybe a bit spicy if you’re comfortable)

Y’all giving me the space to rant and you bet I’m gonna take it all 🫡 jajaja

Boyfriend!mick (part.2) - headcanon | MS47

Warnings: mentions of sex; not proofread.

Mick will definitely call you before going to bed and will most likely fall asleep while talking or listening to you because he’s exhausted and you’re completely fine because you were shit-talking to help him sleep.

He said once during media duties that he preferred calling over texting, but that doesn’t mean he won't text, bf Mick will send you good morning and good night texts EVERY.DAMN.DAY. He doesn’t forget, and starting your day with a cute and sometimes funny message from him has become a habit.

Will trust you to watch Angie while he travels and you love it because it can get lonely at times without him, so it’s heart-warming to have a reminder of Mick ecxitely waggling her tail at you every time you get home from work/school.

Mick strikes me as someone very competetive so I think dating him would bring that trait into your relationship as well, that means you guys will have game nights and whoever loses has to do something, sometimes just clean the dishes, sometimes funny stuff like pranking a friend in common. What you don’t know is that occasionally he lets you win because he loves the way you smile and celebrate afterward.

And a celebration it is when you play strip, whoever loses a round has to take off a piece of clothing. These nights are always a win-win, there’s never really a loser.

HEAR ME OUT ON THIS: Mick is a boob guy. Absolutely loves to play with your boobs while cuddling, sometimes it's not even sexual, he just keeps gripping and pinching your nipple without noticing until you whimper or point out. Will ask to put his head on your chest and your hands on his hair.

Mick’s a private guy, he doesn’t show off or brag about the things you do behind four walls, but jealous Mick??? Jealous Mick will go for a quickie in the bathroom during a party no questions asked, and he won't bat an eye if your friends are able to tell you were busy, Mick will keep his straight face or give one of his cute smiles and carry on talking about whatever subject is going on.

Will praise your body every chance he gets.

Probably has a private folder of suggestive pics you send him, and you love the idea that he uses it when he’s away. It feels powerful to know that only your picture sporting lingerie is able to bring him to the edge.

You have a Polaroid album of both of you over the year and yes there's a section dedicated only for suggestive pics as well.

Last but not least, I will only give a word: STAMINA!

boyfriend. KSN

content : what it’s like to have sunoo as your bf ♡

warnings : none (FLUFF)

a/n : just sunoo being the softest bf ever

dating sunoo is like having a constant source of happiness and love in your life.

one of the best things about having sunoo as a boyfriend is his infectious positive energy. he has a contagious smile and a bright personality.

1. he’s the type to have spontaneous hang out : Sunoo suggests having a picnic in the park one sunny afternoon. you both pack some sandwiches, fruits, and a blanket, and head to the nearby park. you spend the afternoon lounging on the blanket, sharing food, and chatting about anything and everything. Sunoo surprises you with a bouquet of your favorite flowers, making the day even more special.

2. the one to always have a movie night : rather just a movie together when he gets the chance. you both decide to have a cozy movie night at home. Sunoo takes charge of choosing the movie and makes sure there are plenty of snacks and drinks. as you cuddle up on the couch, he can't help but pepper your face with kisses during the romantic scenes.

3. stargazing: sunoo surprises you with a stargazing date. he sets up a comfortable spot for the two of you to lay under the stars. as you gaze up at the night sky, Sunoo points out the constellations and tells you their stories. it’s a peaceful and romantic night under the stars.

4. would always treat you : sunoo treats you to a spa day, with massages, facials, and a relaxing hot tub. you both wear fluffy robes and sip on herbal tea while getting pampered. Sunoo can't stop complimenting how beautiful you look, making you feel like a million bucks.

5. cuddles : oh sunoo is the type of bf that always clings around you, so he loves cuddling. wrapping his arms around you and pulling you closer, whispering sweet nothings in your ear. soft and sweet “i love yous” followed with a cute giggles. he’s not afraid to shower you with love and attention, and will make sure that you feel cherished and appreciated everyday.

6. a caring one : you’re always his top priority no matter what, whether you’re down or just feeling unwell, he’s always there for you to support and take care of you. he would always put your needs above his own and will do anything to see you smile.

7. would fangirl with you : we all know that sunoo is a fan of most groups, he’s the type to support the group with you. whether buying merchandises or even going to the concert together. would unbox an album with you and would be excited to see whose photocard he will pull.

8. the type to be sassy on you some times but would be so protective when a guy randomly flirts with you : a guy approached you at the cafe, asking for your name and number. sunoo rolled his eyes and scoffed as he look away, the guy has just mistook him as your “bestfriend”. “yah, she’s taken. back off or i’ll pull your hair just to leave her alone” he said to the guy in a feisty way. you chuckles as the guy left, “you’re so sassy and feisty”.

9. he likes to take a picture of you as always : his phone is full of his face and mostly yours, even if you’re just sleeping, washing the dishes, or even laughing. he had those all. he would definitely create an instagram account just full of your faces and your picture together. would put “sunoo’s love” to that account’s bio.

10. a great listener and a big comfort : in times of trouble or stress, sunoo will be always there for you no matter what. no matter how small or big the situation is. he knows the right words to say to reassure you. he’ll hold you close and remind you that everything will be okay. with him by your side, you know you can conquer anything that comes your way.

in conclusion, having a boyfriend like sunoo is like having your own personal sunshine. he brings warmth and happiness into your life and makes every moment together feels like a fairytale. he’s the kind of boyfriend you always have dreamed of, and you feel lucky to have him by your side.

Every Side | Reid x Reader

Summary: When work cuts their reunion short, Spencer Reid tries to memorize every side of the Reader in the few hours they have together. Reid x fem!Reader, ✨soft smut (non-graphic but still 18+)✨

Author’s Note: I was listening to Vance Joy’s newest album and I heard this song��that was just so Spencer I had to sit down and write this!  

........

The summer evening air is sticky sweet and she is the only thing on his mind. After a week and a half on the road with Rossi leading trainings for local law enforcement, Spencer Reid can’t stand to be away from her another minute. When she opens her apartment door and he runs straight into her arms it’s like he’s whole again. Breathing in the smell of her perfume and burying his face in the familiar soft skin of her neck as her hands smooth over his back.

“God, I missed you,” she sighs.

“Missed you more,” he replies without missing a beat, pressing his lips to that soft skin. He peppers a trail up to her jaw before capturing her mouth in an overdue kiss.

Their fingers are twined together when she leads him over to the couch and he can’t seem to look away from her smiling face. “I’ve got a whole weekend with no plans,” he tells her. “We’re doing anything and everything you want to do.”

“Anything?” she asks, eyebrows raised. “Careful, love, you might regret that.”

“I won’t. Anything you want to do, you name it. Park picnics, fancy dinners, museums visits, road trips –”

“You?”

A laugh escapes his lips, heat rising in his cheeks. “I - well, yes. I’m certainly an option.” 

The ability to catch him off guard like this is just one of the many things he adores about her. In some ways their love still feels so new, so much still to be discovered and experienced. At the same time the last eight months have been a lifetime with the way she fits into a space in his heart he thinks she must have always occupied. She brings out the best in him, sees sides of him he wasn’t even sure existed. And he’s hopelessly head over heels for her.

The first thing she asks for is to have dinner together. After a week on the road a home-cooked meal sounds divine, so he sits on the counter chopping vegetables for the curry she’s making and regales her with tales of Rossi’s expensive taste in dining and hotels during their trip. They eat warm naan fresh out of the oven and she pours them both chai lattes and they’re grinning all the way through dinner as they sketch out their plans for the remarkable weekend before them. It’s blissful and silly and right - until they’re doing the dishes together and she’s flicking water at him as he tries to dodge the aim of the soapy suds and suddenly his phone rings.

Her hands freeze and his heart sinks because they both know that ringtone. Sure enough, Garcia is on the other end of the line to explain that a case has escalated while he and Rossi were away. The Bureau wants them out there as soon as possible.

“I’m sorry,” he says the moment he hangs up the phone.

She shrugs, drying her hands on the dishtowel. “I know. But there are lives to save. Where are they sending you?”

“Denver. Serial arson. We fly out at 8 AM tomorrow.” It’s unbearable already, the thought of another few days spent in unfamiliar, empty hotel rooms. Takeout dinners and police station coffee and people that aren’t her. Aren’t the one he loves, the only one he wants to see right now.

“I guess you gotta go home and pack then, huh?” It’s less of a question than a resignation, an understanding admission of defeat. Deferring her own desires to his duties so easily.

That surrender something stirs in his chest and he shakes his head. There’s only one thing he needs right now. “No.” She looks up at him, eyes wide. “No, I have a go-bag ready at the office. I might not be able to give you everything you wanted this weekend. But I can give you one thing.” Reid cups her face, pulling her to him. Those wide eyes of hers search his as he leans in to kiss her, his teeth grazing over her bottom lip. “And you can give me something to remember you by.”

Her breath catches and her hand traces up his chest. “When did you get so smooth, Doctor Reid?”

“Around the time I realized how much I liked the sound of you calling me doctor.”

They meander their way into her bedroom, giggling like teenagers as they undo buttons and remove layers, fingertips wandering every which way. When he finally gets his shirt off, she places the softest of kisses to his collarbone, her touch warm against his chest. “Are you sure you’re okay spending the night here?” she asks.

“Very. I don’t know how long I’ll be gone.” He sinks down onto the bed and wraps his arms around her waist. From there it’s easy to press his face to her chest. He can hear her heartbeat as he presses his mouth to the valley between her breasts. “All I want is to be with you. All I ever want is you.”

That confirmation is all she needs to join him on the mattress, straddling his hips as she tangles her hands in his hair. Pulls just a little bit, just enough to elicit a groan she catches in a kiss. The taste of tea still lingers on her lips and he wants to savor it, drink in the way she feels and the warmth of her tongue.

When she leans back to catch her breath her eyes find his, so full of longing. The way she looks at him makes him melt on the spot. It’s the way she sees him, the way she knows him, a gaze that leaves no room for misunderstanding. He can feel it, feel her, and he needs more of her. His greedy hands roam over her body, down the plane of her back before finding the curve of her ass. A soft squeeze before his touch travels across her hips and he pushes her panties down her legs. She whimpers at the brush of his fingers over her heat and god, he’s so hard already.

Being with her is like nothing he’s ever felt before. Every touch is so loud, every sensation amplified, but it’s never too much, not when it’s her. With her, every second of passion is laced with something stronger. He realized it early in their relationship - the way he felt more connected to her than he ever had with anyone else before. It’s that love that makes it all feel so much more. How she trusts him so completely, how he finds himself telling her all his secrets without any fear, how she makes him feel so safe. So loved. So enough.

“You’re sure taking your time,” she murmurs, hands clutching bedsheets.

He looks up from between her legs, tongue swiping over the wetness on his lips. “It’s a luxury I don’t have enough of,” he tells her.

He bows his head once more and she cries his name. “I miss you already. Miss you so much.” A tear slips down her cheek and he crawls up close to her to wipe it away.

“You have me now.” He kisses the corner of her eye, tasting saltwater. “I’m right here.”

It’s intimacy in every sense of the word, he thinks, that turns the heat of arousal into a forest fire. Sets all of him ablaze beneath her lips, makes every single motion feel so magnificent.

He loves her. He loves her so much he cannot fully tell her in words. Only in closeness, in contact, in the fine, tender frenzy of the flesh.

The summer night unfolds outside her window as she lays back on the bed and opens herself to him like a gift. A perfect, pretty offering. He treats her with the proper reverence such a sacred thing deserves. Devotes himself to every inch of her in an attempt to make up for lost time. While he has been blessed with an eidetic memory, Reid has come to find that no memory quite does her justice. Nevertheless he commits himself to finding and kissing every spot, every scar, every square inch of her skin. Tries to hold on to every sound she makes, each moan or mewl, each time her breath hitches and she begs for him by name. He will memorize every side of her to stave off the loneliness the road demands.

In a hotel room alone he will close his eyes and replace every monster of the criminal abyss with replays of these moments. Her eyes shining like stars as she looks up at him through her lashes, the way her lips part in a gasp, the softness of her hand on his cheek and her kisses sprinkled across his jaw. These memories will be his solace in the days to come, but he tries not to get too lost in holding on when he can simply hold her; and so he tries to be present in the now without worrying about tomorrow.

Tonight, he is all hers, and she holds him so tight as he buries himself between her thighs again and again and again.

The air is sticky and sweet as they find new ways to say I love you without words. And when they are both thoroughly spent he goes to open her window, letting the late night breeze cool the bedroom. She falls asleep quickly, which takes him by surprise until he notices the clock on her nightstand signifies that tomorrow is today now. In just a few hours the sun will rise and he will be crossing time zones once more.

Despite the early start to his day, he stays awake a little longer just to look at her. He listens to the symphony of her breathing, watches her shoulders rise and fall. Sweat still paints her face, her hair is wild on the pillowcase, and even in her sleep she smiles. And he loves every side of her. The sighing lover who licks a stripe down his belly, the laughing girl who splashes him at the kitchen sink, the patient listener of his many rambles, the knowing smirker glancing at him from behind a book, the love of his life fast asleep under the moonlight looking as peaceful as he has ever seen. Every piece of her has a place in his heart and tonight he just wants to love all of her for a little bit longer.

“I love you,” he whispers as dreamland calls to him. Hoping that somehow she’ll hear him.

His sleep is brief. An alarm on his watch is muffled by the pillow he stuffed it under. Reid rises slowly and quietly in the dim morning light. He dresses haphazardly and writes her a quick love note. In the bathroom he finds the t-shirt she sleeps in next to a bottle of her perfume. He snags the shirt and spritzes it with the fragrance, knowing she won’t mind if he borrows it for just a few days.

Something else to remember her by, to keep her close to him.

The train to Quantico is mostly empty. He holds his messenger bag tight in his arms, daydreaming of her still. He’s not quite sure when he’ll be back, but what he’s sure of is this: when he comes home, he will ask her to move in with him. Because he can’t stand the thought of being away from her for a second more than he absolutely must. Without her, his world won’t quite be whole. In a matter of months, she’s become his whole world.

Sitting on the jet, his phone buzzes with a text from her. I love you too, it reads.

He smiles. Leaning back in the seat, he puts it back into his pocket as start their journey up into the sky. The sun is high in the early morning sky, painting the world orange and gold on every side and he closes his eyes, playing back in his mind every moment with her that he’ll miss until she is in his arms again.

.

✨

Interview from Rock Hard FR #232

The devil is in the details

You never hid it, Metallica had a big influence on your way of thinking about your career. Impera is your fifth album. It allowed you to play in very big venues, it saw you reach the first place of the US charts. Is it, in a way, your Black Album?

I don't think I can compare our career to Metallica. The band was, at the time, part of this huge mainstream rock wave that was the equivalent of what many rap bands are today. In 1991, Metallica was listened to by every high school student. Whereas, on our side, even if it's undeniable that we're doing well, it's always young people "on the fringe" who listen to us because our trajectory has always been more alternative than mainstream. But it's true that the pressure we felt when creating this fifth album is surely the same as the one Metallica experienced at the time, as well as Iron Maiden with Powerslave (1984). Metallica did have a huge impact on me, it influenced my way of thinking enormously, as did Maiden again, especially in terms of how to tour, how much work to put into our projects, how to behave... We've toured with both bands, and a lot of our strategies - even if it sounds a bit like we're a company - about how to create a good atmosphere for all the people who work with us on the road are very much influenced by the fact that we've opened for them and that they've treated us well.

It is not easy to manage such a success, to manage to prolong the ascension while reinventing oneself sufficiently. Metallica made the choice to drastically change its orientation on all levels, even if it meant taking a big risk. How do you approach this step, which is similar, for Ghost?

We're not at a point where we've accomplished everything yet, especially in terms of gigs, the places I want to play, and there are still a lot of new people to reach. Musically, I already have an album in mind that will contain things we haven't done yet. I also have a film project. But if I ever wanted to do something totally different, I would probably do it under a different name. I'm trying to make Ghost evolve into whatever form it can take, but I would never say to myself, "Okay, I'm going to give up the theatrical stuff, we're going to play in the clothes we wear every day". That's not cool, that's not what we're known for, and that's not what people want. Of course, you could argue that we've already disappointed fans of the first and second albums, who feel they didn't get what they wanted, but exploring new territories and evolving is a very difficult thing to define. Nevertheless, I think there are some key ingredients in the Ghost recipe that I can't subtract without causing serious consequences. If you think of Ghost as a dish in an Italian restaurant, the music is the olives and garlic, our visual attitude is the pasta base, you can't remove one of the two ingredients from such a dish without distorting it... I would add that the lyrics would be the cheese! (laughs) But if I had more time, I would love to play drums in a punk rock band in the future!

I'd like to talk more specifically about the universe and philosophy of the Ghost concept, which is a band that has always given the feeling of being black metal... but without the black metal music. The cover of Prequelle (2018), for example, or the lyrics of a track like "Majesty" are elements that one would easily imagine to find in a black metal band...

I come from the black and death metal scene. I built myself up with it, starting to listen to this music when I was in puberty. My whole adolescence was coloured by this extreme scene, although I grew up listening to a lot of different styles of music. It's clearly my home, where this sort of sub-culture or pop-culture that I like so much comes from. But I also got out of sync with the times pretty quickly: by 1995, I had already lost interest in new bands, being too busy listening to 1985 bands instead! (laughs) The bands I liked the most were still around though. Either because their careers were still going strong, or because they were reforming. In fact, the music that followed me all my life was the music my mother listened to when she was young: The Rolling Stones, The Beatles, The Doors, Janis Joplin, Jimi Hendrix. It was an echo of another era, the 60s and 70s, which I obviously never experienced. But metal being closer to me, it comes out in Ghost, even though a lot of our melodic elements come from something else. It's in the attitude and the lyrics that you find my black metal, death metal and punk influences. This nervousness, this biting side, the will to move mountains with words, in a very adolescent, aggressive approach...

Since the beginning of the band, some of your lyrics have been precisely anchored in religious references, sacred texts like the Bible. For example, Satan Prayer contains an ‘inverted’ version of the Nicene creed, and many other lyrics refer to very specific things that I imagine you have studied in detail...

Yes, I've always been interested in religion, especially when I started, as a teenager, to get interested in demons and the occult. That was the beginning of my first band. I started writing songs and spent a lot of time with a dictionary, trying to collect words, phrases, and that's what I still do with Ghost today. When you work with words, you have this desire to explore your inner self, linguistically, to refine your language. I'm bilingual, but I want to keep learning new words, new phrases, grammar, whether it's in English or Swedish. When I started writing lyrics, I wanted to do death metal, then black metal, and all the bands I listened to used these words and names inspired by biblical or semi-biblical texts, or expressions in "Latinized" English. I read books on religion, the Bible of course, but I also turned to films, anything I could find, at a time when, without the Internet, it was more difficult to find sources. I collected and gathered a lot of things!

There's another thing you've cultivated since the beginning, in parallel with these very satanic lyrics: it's your sense of humour, which allows for a rather explosive duality. So, when Ghost was still only on Myspace, you were already sending deadpan messages to the fans who contacted you. Like: “you'll burn in hell for eternity for being interested in Ghost... but you can still send us your questions!”

(Laughs) As far back as I can remember, I've always been like that! It sounds a bit silly when you say it like that, but the world loves to laugh. I've always been guided by humour, satire, even when I was playing with Repugnant. Even back then I had a bit of an ironic attitude, and I always added humorous elements to my work. I've always enjoyed both the joking and the very dark - at least on the surface - aspects of some bands. In the underground scene I know, with the exception of a few idiots who were completely dead inside, and who actually had huge mental problems, most of my friends were very funny guys, always guided by the joke and the humour. That's a very important thing to me. I can't imagine living without comedy, without the ability to laugh at almost anything. From my point of view, it's what allows us to deal with things that are supposed to make us cry. There are so many tragic and horrible events in the world, and you'll always find someone to say, "No, it's too soon to laugh about it". But for me, it's never too early. It's a very contemporary thing, to constantly question what we are allowed to laugh about, what we are allowed to say. But I really think that in the future we'll be able to start laughing at everything again, because that's how we get through things. No matter how negative or horrible the subject is, that's how we should live our lives: trying to entertain each other, allowing ourselves to have fun with almost - and I mean almost - everything.

As we said, despite this fun side, your lyrics are very serious. Nevertheless, in the eyes of some listeners, you may give the idea that all this is only a parody of Satanic codes, for fun. It is however difficult to imagine you making fun of Satanism when we know the strong links you had with the late Selim Lemouchi (The Devil's Blood) or that still unite you with Erik Danielsson (Watain), two figures who we know do not joke at all with the question...

(He cuts me off) But I don't make fun of Satanism! Not at all! That was never my intention (silence) I take the example of the book The Name Of The Rose, written by Umberto Eco. Anybody who reads this book can understand, especially in Europe, where many people grew up under a Catholic religious influence... Do you have any recollection of the Church being associated with anything comical or funny? Do you remember priests as comedians, who make you laugh and have a good time? No... Because the devil has always represented intellectualism, freedom of thought, comedy and satire, whereas Christianity has always represented the opposite: the repression of feelings and needs. For me, if you want to approach things from a satanic angle, I can't imagine a more satanic life than the one we propose! (laughs) We talk about freedom, intellectualism, laughter, not following the conformist path. There is sometimes an attitude among the people who form the underground scene that makes them confuse the totalitarian nature of the Church with its opposite. But what do you want? A totalitarian Christianity without the slightest hint of laughter or the other way? You decide... It's also a funny confusion when it comes to the symbols, rhetorical elements, references to the Bible and visual language we use, both in Ghost and in metal in general: we are all fascinated by the devil, power, all that stuff, but to my knowledge, not a single destructive empire in the history of mankind has been designated as Satanic... The number of murders perpetrated by Satanists can be counted on the fingers of a few hands, whereas the HUGE amount of people tortured, raped, killed, burned, stoned, dismembered, thrown like piles of rubbish in public places, for thousands of years, in the name of Christianity and other religions, is insurmountable. Who are those who do harm? (silence) Who are those who cannot take a joke? If you don't want to laugh and prefer to become an authoritarian person, determined to fuck people up, you should go and see a priest, it's the best thing to do...

A band like Black Sabbath had to make their non-Satanism clear early in their career because they couldn't stand to be misunderstood, both by believers and by Satanists themselves. Ghost is eminently more blasphemous than Black Sabbath, but you were never forced by events to speak out on the issue. The Telegraph newspaper recently ran the headline: "How Ghost became the acceptable face of Satanism".

I think it has a lot to do with the groundwork Black Sabbath laid fifty years ago. The first Satanic bands, like Black Widow, Coven or Black Sabbath - and I think even the Rolling Stones, although it's just a word in the title of a song (editor's note: Sympathy For The Devil /1968) - were confronted with the peculiarity of the late 60s. They were in their twenties, born in the 40s, and had taken a big leap into a new era, with all these new freedoms that their parents didn't have, who had been born in the 10s or 20s. And their parents were embarrassed by it all. The long hair alone was too much, not to mention the way they lived their sexuality and didn't care about anything. For their parents, these kids were ruining everything. Today, I dare say that our concerts probably bring together four generations of people. Those born in the 40s, others born in the 50s and 60s, then my generation, and finally the younger ones. All of these people have grown up with a pop-cultural Satan in one way or another, whether it's movies or rock music. It's not as provocative as it used to be, unless you're a puritan or a black metalhead who doesn't know how to smile and thinks that Ghost is joking with Satanism... I would like to point out something else in this regard: of course, Ghost never joked with Satan, not at all, but on the other hand, I'm not trying to embody the face of Satanism. My approach is different from that of Selim or Erik. I'm not trying to get people to take my... (fumbling for words)... whether I am a Satanist or not. At the end of the day, we're an entertainment group. I want to make people happy, but also inspire them. And while I'm doing that with my band, I take the opportunity to give the listeners an idea of what I think about things, how I feel about them. But let's say there is no... programme! (small laugh) I don't think that way. I want to do my bit to help make the world a better place, according to my vision, that of someone who grew up in the 80s with VHS of horror films. My childhood memories are of such a liberated cultural climate... We had almost no restrictions, and I combined that with my personal life, with an older brother and a very liberal mother. There was BB King in one room, the Dead Kennedys in the other, and me in the middle, playing on the table with my Star Wars figures. I believe in a very culturally liberated society, and I want to offer a kind of big buffet with all these things that made me. I think most people think like me. At least the ones I know, because there are of course people elsewhere in the world who seem to miss the great days of the KGB... I don't know what they miss most: perhaps the lack of food and the empty stalls? But it's natural to be nostalgic, to want to go back to a time when life was cool. I believe that, in the near future, the life we are talking about will be allowed to exist. We will be able to listen to rock'n'roll, eat whatever we want, kiss whoever we want as long as they agree to be kissed back, and that's regardless of gender. And the only thing I can do to move those mountains is music, making people dance and laugh. It's the only thing I've ever been interested in, and also the only thing I'm capable of doing. I can't do more, I can't do differently...

The children's choir at Hellfest singing "Come together for Lucifer’s son" is far more disturbing than any ritual with pig's blood and inverted crosses. Yet few people are shocked. Most find it fun. Ghost is thus a kind of joyful satanic expression!

I love the duality of this experience! I also have my moments where I turn into a poser doing the "invisible oranges" gesture [editor’s note: a gesture that consists of holding both hands in front of you as if you were holding oranges] when I hear something that sounds **EVIL**  (laughs) I like this aggressive, dark side, because it is also a part of me. But I chose to present this part, at least with Ghost, in a more joyful, positive way, because I believe that the Force is a balance. You have to combine the light and the dark. Everything evolves in a circular way, and if you try to trick people into using only one or the other side, it doesn't work. I don't believe in that. Doing this kind of stuff is the most intuitive way to express myself and my feelings. For me, "Monstrance Clock" with children defines me exactly, in the strongest way: it's funny and solemn at the same time, in a sacred sense... It's my more childish side because I also want to believe in supernatural things. I really do!

Because you are not an atheist.

(Firmly) No! I am not! I believe in the Force! Of all the explanations that exist, George Lucas' is the best: we have to work with the Force, it needs to evolve, but you can use it in two different ways, positive or negative. With it, you can destroy as well as rebuild...

so I've told my "how this hyperfixation started" story before but i remembered some stuff while i was doing the dishes

as I've mentioned, 3 years ago i was looking for some music to help me sleep. I've been a life-long insomniac. what i remembered was that i was really into a particular production of the white christmas musical at that time and was re-listening to the movie soundtrack. i grew up watching that movie.

so likely, i was recommended dean on youtube because of that. i had some concept of him because they play let it snow every year but like nothing relevant. strangely, i don't remember ever hearing him at olive garden despite going there a lot as a kid and they usually plat dean in the olive gardens. i remember frank though. he was just the guy they played at olive garden to 10 year old me.

so, as I've mentioned before, his music didn't help me sleep and the first album i heard was welcome to my world. what i remembered was that this particular playlist had the backing vocals removed. i didn't hear the backup singers until later.

also, since i couldn't sleep, i started doing color by numbers until i passed out. i played welcome to my world every night on a loop for quite some time.

and, as I've mentioned before, i was up at probably 3 am (doing color by numbers, listening to welcome to my world) and BAM in the moment i realized i had a crush on him!

and as I've said, I'd never really seen a picture of him, except for the picture on the cover of "welcome to my world" which is small and even smaller on youtube.

i felt instant, unmatched embarrassment and dread. i said I'd die before i said anything to anyone.

and for three years solid, i didn't.

but THEN i happened to watch mr. ricco around election day last year and i realized: oh no, oh god, i love that old man.

and after days of deliberating i sent a message to my friend jess. i was mortified! how was i going to admit i like some character played by dean of all people! when he was in his late fifties no less!

i realized the crush i was going to take to my grave was out of the bag.

mostly it's been chill. except for one anon and my parents mocking me for the longest time (my fears realized!)

"At this moment 46 years ago I was on a stage in Hyde Park doing a show to a lot of people.

In the hot summer 1976 we were at The Manor Studios in Oxford working on a new Queen album which was gonna be called A Day At The Races. The band worked away while the crew spent most of the day lounging by the pool or playing snooker. And possibly drinking as well. Then somebody came up with the idea of doing some shows. Two in Edinburgh, one in Cardiff and then a freebie in Hyde Park.

For the London show we used The Rolling Stones stage and the opening acts were Supercharge, Steve Hillage and Kiki Dee.

We set the stage the day before and then I took all the cymbals home and spent the evening giving them a good shine. On the Saturday morning I got a cab to Marble Arch then walked through the park to the backstage area and boy there were a lot of people when I got there. Even though it was a huge show everyone seemed quite relaxed about it.

All the support bands were told they couldn't use the catwalk but when Supercharge went on, Albie Donnelly, the singer, took off his coat and was wearing a white leotard underneath. He ran onto the catwalk, stuck his teeth out and shouted "Galileo" Various crew members found this highly amusing but needless to say management and band didn't see the funny side of it. They were a great funky band and if you can be bothered have a listen on Youtube or Spotify to 'She Moved The Dishes First.' It's a bit naughty but very funny and that song was played on every Queen tour right up until Magic in 86.

Next was Steve Hillage. Yawn. He had a green pyramid shaped amp to 'Get the perfect sound.' Well that didn't work did it. While he was playing a fight broke out down the front and in his whiny voice he said, "Stop fighting" and then somebody lobbed a bottle at him. Fab.

Kiki followed and she has a beautiful voice. She had a cardboard cutout of Elton when she sang 'Don't go Breaking My Heart.'

While Kiki was on it was time for us to start getting ready for our bit.This was the first and only time our passes had our photos on them and I'd been on and off the stage all day, but this time the dickhead security guy didn't believe the photo was me and wouldn't let me through. Eventually it was sorted and I got on and got my gear sorted.

The band played great and the punters were having a good time but because of the strict curfew we weren't allowed to do an encore, but luckily there wasn't a riot. All in all it went well and a lot of people had a good time. 😎😎😎"

By Crystal Taylor

Thank you very much x

Via Queen At The Races on Facebook.

+ Bonus

it’s not supposed to make sense. trust me. also like technically this is an x reader fic, but it feels less like that to me...? dunno. I did say it wasn’t supposed to make sense. here is the piece mentioned throughout the story - please give it a listen, it’s truly beautiful.

wc: 1.5k ~ jun x gender neutral!reader ~ no au really, idk how to classify this ~ triggers: none ~ seventeen masterlist

~ Jun arrives with the sun and the snow, memories of music in his fingertips.

[ a yellow scarf in winter ] He comes in winter, hands cold from the snow and eyes warm as a summer on the equator. At the sound of the knock, you place down the pile of pale yellow wool turning into the beginnings of a scarf or a shirt or something in between, the color of the sun sparkling on fresh snow, to meet him at the door. 

A place to stay, he requests, starlight in his smile. 

He doesn’t specify how long.

His name is Jun, he says, and that’s that. He doesn’t tell you much more. What you learn of Jun in the passing days comes in casual action and conversation, the things he lets slip as he settles into your home. But it’s not so much him letting things slip, really, as you noticing the way his quirks simply fall into place like the last missing pieces of your puzzle. As though you know him - knew him - even before you did. 

He’s shy. He’s gentle. He has a special affinity for the cats that sometimes show up around the house. Chaos etches itself in the tiny smile wrinkles around his eyes, in the double eyelids that always seem to droop no matter how he insists he’s awake, and he has a high little giggle that feels like the spring flower tickling your skin when he tucks it against your ear. The long fingers that like to tangle with your own also like to make music, dancing their way along the polished keys of the piano in your living room. They take a while to warm up after being outside in the cold, but playing scales helps. So does wrapping them around a mug of hot water. Or holding your hands that Jun always says are miraculously so much warmer than his.

In the cold remnants of winter, you learn his favorite tea, how he drinks it slow, sip by tiny sip. In the early days of spring, you learn his favorite flower, the one he settles gently behind your ear. In the heat of summer you learn how lightly he sleeps, how he likes spice in everything he eats, and in the last dregs of autumn, you learn how he laughs under the smiling sun, his feet crunching through dead leaves on the ground. As the year passes you learn he is constant in his inconstancy, disappearing for hours without notice and sometimes even days with such irregularity that it becomes regular, yet when he is home he never fails to return to routine, helping you with dinner, helping you wash the dishes, settling himself at the piano at night to play his favorite songs.

You ask him on one of the nights when summer is turning to fall, after the remnants of dinner have been cleared away and only the stars are awake to hear you speak. Where do you go when you’re gone?

Everywhere, he replies, the moon glowing in his smile. And nowhere, all at once.

You listen to his music that night, a gentle melody that lasts no longer than two minutes but that resonates through the room, deep, heavy, comforting nostalgia weaving a blanket over your body. Every piece he plays is beautiful, but this one lingers with you even after you’ve woken the next morning. 

What was the piece you played last night, the soft one that sounded like reminiscence?

Jun shuffles through the music stacked neatly atop the piano. Pulls out a worn sheet, yellowing at the edges, notes laid black across the page, and hands it to you.

Un feuille d’album, you read. The strange syllables slip loose, light off your tongue. 

An album leaf, Jun translates. By Chopin. 

It’s French.

Chopin lived in France for much of his life, he says, looking at the keys. But he was Polish. His home was Poland. And though he never saw it again after he moved...

The silence falls gentle, heavy, leftover notes fading in the air, the dust of the old sheet music settling to the floor. Reminiscence.

He only ever wanted to go home.

You don’t ask him the question, but he must hear it lingering on your tongue. 

Where is your home?

You’re not quite sure he knows the answer himself. Because as the days pass, still he wanders, and still he stays. 

He’s playing the same piece when autumn has begun to give way to winter, when you find a familiar pile of yellow wool in the drawer of the little table beside your couch. Part of it has been knit into some shape, but only barely - easy enough for you to decide it will be a scarf, a decision you didn’t get to make a year ago, and easy enough for you to pick up the needles from where the universe left them and for their gentle clicking to accompany Jun’s music wisping about the room.

Who’s that for? he asks when the album leaf has been played, its yellowing page set back on top of the piano.

You look down at the soft yellow wool, at the needles clicking and flashing between your fingers. I’m not sure.

It’s a dumb question, though, and even dumber answer. Because it’s obvious. Even though you began the scarf with no thought of its future owner, as it grows longer and longer under warm nights of gentle music sheltered from the winter chill, when you look over at the boy whose hands get cold all too easily, you know, and the world knows. 

Of course the scarf is for him.

You give it to him one night when winter is closer than fall, loop it around his neck when he leaves the piano to sit at your side. He played that piece again, the fluttering old pages of an album leaf, and its notes still linger in your ears as you settle the scarf at his throat. 

He doesn’t react, only touches a finger to the soft yellow wool, the color of the sun on the snow the day he first knocked on your door. It’s as though he knew it was made for him, even before you did. The way you knew him, even before he arrived.

Jun kisses you that night, light and gentle, the way you’d imagine soft snow pattering to the ground when the world is asleep and the stars have come out to play. His breath ghosts in a wisp past your lips when he pulls away, eyes crinkling at the corners into a smile that grows wider the longer he looks at you. 

Thank you for the scarf, he says. And for letting me stay.

That night, the first snow falls. And when morning comes with the shimmering sun on snow, Jun is gone. 

This time, he doesn’t come back.

Reality seems to blur as the days go by, one without Jun, two without Jun, three, four, six, ten. Sometimes you squint at the upright piano standing against the wall and for a moment you can’t quite recall whether you’ve always had it, or if it simply came into existence when Jun’s music followed him into your home. But you still remember him even if he wasn’t real, the sleepy eyes, the wide smile, the soft voice that waltzed with long fingers across ivory keys and spun music to life, tapestries of notes that settled gentle, ephemeral in the air before a single breath blew it away - you remember him as an album leaf of pastel memories and watercolor laughs left to dry under winter sunshine, the color of the pale yellow scarf a giggling boy in the picture wears around his neck, its ends fluttering in the breeze. 

An album leaf. A page of memory. Loved in the moment that it was there, then turned over and smoothed with care. Remembered. Treasured.

You sift through the music one night as the moon glows full in the sky, search for the yellowing page he showed you that night. Your fingers trace black letters printed on the smooth, old paper. Un feuille d’album. In it you hear his voice, his silence, his music, his laugh.

Maybe, you think, he’s finally gone home.

With love comes loss, and with loss comes grief. You know this well. But as you stare at the album leaf between your fingers, its dark notes sung across the page, you can’t help but feel as though there was no loss at all. Because Jun was always there, even when he wasn’t - is still here now, even, a wisp, a memory, the remnants of a shy laugh blurred by the soft tinkling of piano keys. 

A gentle melody humming through the air, and a yellow scarf rippling in the wind. 

If you enjoyed, please don’t forget to reblog and leave a comment to tell me what you thought! Thank you for reading and have a lovely day <3

(1 reblog = 1 heart for you <3)

genshin impact headcanons bc ive literally been playing the game for like a month straight and ngl im having the time of my life idc

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i like to think that xiao has made little graves/shrines for each of this fallen adeptal brethren. (i do know that there are official graves for them that is like connected quest, but for this i mean like personal graves that are quite hidden) xiao comes to these shrines often, everyday almost, at the start of his day, when night falls, when he comes back from battle, after being with the traveler, pretty much after or before anything he does. sometimes when xiao states that he has "adeptal duties", he actually is just trying to keep those shrines cleaned, neat and tidy, and will do his best to bring their favorite objects and place them near their shrine, whilst actually doing his adeptal duties. no one knows where these shrines are expect for zhongli probably, the thought of telling the traveler at one point did cross his mind, but he held his tongue and kept it to himself. xiao comes to these shrines when he needs to heal, or to rest for a certain amount of time, to cry, to vent, to anything. he still treats these shrines as his family, often reminiscing the times they were alive and by his side.

quite similar to xiao, i think kaeya visits his late father's grave very often, probably more than diluc, even though crepus' death hit diluc harder out of the two. each time, he brings something, anything, hoping that his father is looking down upon him and enjoying the gifts kaeya offers in the afterlife. kaeya usually only comes once a day, talks with his father's grave, and then leaves. he tries to stay as long as he can, but knows he must go or else his mind will begin to play tricks on him. only a certain few know where his father's grave his, besides diluc. only will kaeya will come to his grave more than once a day if he needs guidance, ideas, quiet time, or with any sort of help. when diluc goes to crepus' grave and sees all these gifts, a slight twinge of guilt spirals inside of him, knowing that deep down inside, kaeya truly did care for crepes, just as much, or even more than he did.

kazuha definitely has a photographic memory. i mean, how else would be able to revisit his favorite places, or places with such exquisite scenery that pleased his heart and mind? though, if his memory does fail him, he always remembers to leave a little something to "mark" that he has been there before (maybe like a small carving on a tree, a certain rock stored somewhere, etc.) often, kazuha will remember the details of someone's face, and their scent (similar to that of both razor and gorou), and if you need help finding a certain someone, kazuha would be the one to go to. also, kazuha probably eats bugs when it's his last resort of food in the wild, and surprisingly, they taste kinda decent...a little too decent. (but that's bc he believes every dish should be made with care and cooked to perfection tehe haha tehe)

zhongli loves photography. it is said that he loves the arts, so why not add this to a list of things he has in interest in? the ideas of this kamera intrigued him deeply, as he's always wanted to be able to capture the physical memory of something forever. once he got his hands on one, oh boy , he just started snapping away and oh, how he loved it very much so. it was a bit of getting used to, but once he got it, he got it. the pictures he took were surprisingly exceptional, however one shouldn't suspect less from the geo archon himself. it was recommended that he start selling these pictures because of their high quality, but zhongli refused. occasionally, when the traveler visited, zhongli would partake in showing them all the pictures he had taken while they were away, and giving context to each picture. though it may seem boring to some and interesting to others, the traveler listened anyways, happy to see zhongli just enjoying something he likes. he does take pictures of the ones he cares for obviously, and eventually makes a sort of photo album for all the photos he snaps. after a little while the album becomes quick thick :]

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thats all for now!! quite short but jus tryna get back into the swing of writing stuff yk. i'll probably write some more soon. hope you enjoyed!!

regulus is reputation, James is lover

Rosekiller is just reputation

Remus is Red and Sirius is 1989

Dorcas seems like Red and Marlene is Reuptation

this THIS is something I can and WILL talk about forever !!!!!! (Sorry in advance!!)

James is Lover! This is something that is so right and true!! Tell me he would not obnoxiously scream London Boy at Regulus just to annoy him so much !!!!! Dancing to Lover w Regulus in the kitchen at night !! Blasting Paper Rings while he cleans the house, mopping and doing laundry and humming it to himself when he does dishes and he doesn’t see regulus blush PROFUSELY EVERYTIME BC HE KNOWS JAMES IS THINKING ABT HIM

Regulus gives me such Folklore vibes (to me) the 1, THIS IS ME TRYING, PEACE, ILLICIT AFFAIRS, even my tears ricochet are so Regulus Black coded to me !!

Rosekiller is Reputation!! Definitely Reputation!! I Did Something Bad, Call It What You Want,,, yeah YEAH they’ll pretend not to listen to Taylor swift but they will defend this album w their lives if u speak bad abt it

Lily Evans is Fearless !! Love Story, You Belong With Me,,,, she’s belting this album out so loud alone in her room dancing in her pajamas using her hairbrush as a microphone and PERFORMING!!

Marlene gives me Speak Now vibes ngl she went home and played Enchanted 28304927 times after meeting Dorcas but would rather die than tell anyone bc she knows it’s cheesy she screams Better Than Revenge in her car even though she feels slightly bad at the anti-feminist nature of it, The Story of Us, Mean!! She lives for it!! She crusades against John Mayer because of Dear John!!!

Remus is Red !! I l Knew You Were Trouble and he thinks abt Sirius,,, He drunkenly sings We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together w the girls after him and Sirius “break up” for the 3949328 time, he argues that Jake Gyllenhaal is worse than John Mayer w Marlene

Sirius gives me Reputation vibes idk I feel like New Years Day is his favourite off the album but it’s tied w Don’t Blame Me. Also …READY FOR IT? That is Sirius abt Remus !!!!!!!!! Gorgeous,, these are Sirius Black

Dorcas gives me 1989 vibes!! She sings How You Get The Girl with Marlene and laughs because she’s so overwhelmed w happiness!! I Know Places!! Shake It Off is her guilty pleasure song! She listens to Style religiously

Mary is TS (is this controversial?? maybe) but Should’ve Said No is her song!!! Also Picture to Burn !!! Our Song changed her life when it came out she watched the music video obsessively

Peter listens to Weezer (JK JK IM NOT GONNA DO HIM LIKE THAT) Peter gives me Evermore vibes. Tolerate It!!! Closure !!! Right Where You Left Me!! These are Petter Pettigrew coded !!! Also he related every couple he can to Champagne Problems!! Watching Little Women w Jo and Laurie “it’s just like Champagne Problems when Taylor says…” The Notebook when Noah and Allie are going through it “It’s just like in Champagne Problems when…” lmaoooo

Would love to hear your thots on Brady tkachuk - 💖

OH BOY WHERE TO BEGIN 💖 ANON!!

- younger, uglier, cooler tkachuk brother

- i'm convinced and also terrified that he's going to glow up HARD in the next five years. he will be hotter than shane pinto, scientifically the hotted sen. the nhl will have a horny meltdown while cishet male hockey fans in ottawa specifically will be having a crisis of homoerotic lust. it's ok to be gay guys!! embrace your erotic fealty to brady tkachuk

- the mark stone rookie house...something about mark stone being the most beloved sen of all time and de facto-but-not-named captain letting brady live in his house and brady then becoming captain....a lineage of ottawa captaincy post-karlsson...not to get in my mark stone feelings that i inherited from ash, casey, and oli, but the just, the narrative implications of mark stone setting the stage for brady to take charge - i open my home to you in my absence so that you might learn to take care of my team by doing this dishes with your fellow rookies - learn to cook for josh norris and tim stützle so that you learn the physical act of caretaking for the team....and brady did!!!! mark stone helped ease him into leadership!!!!! MARK STONE'S FINAL ACT AS A SENATOR: CAPTAIN BRADY TKACHUK

- it is fun to call him "captain brady." captaincy should be assigned to who it is most fun to call "captain [first name]". many men in the nhl fail this very specific vibe check but brady passes with flying colors

- i am also convinced he could be book smart if he had not dedicated himself to the art of learning every lyric on the killers 2004' genre-defining album, hot fuss, instead of applying himself in school. which, as someone who barely passed sophomore english bc i was too busy doodling the lyrics of "all these things that i've done" on every available flat surface, very relatable! i also dont know how to read

- do you think he kins with "andy you're a star". do you think he has laid on his childhood bedroom in the offseason listening to "andy you're a star" through oversized headphones thinking about quinn hughes. do you ever just think abt that

- one time i started writing a tim/brady fic and got a scene in before i realized that i would have to learn about the sens really for real so i gave up lol, but it's there in the back of my mind, waiting for the day when i am psychologically ready to open my heart to the ottawa senators

just off the top of my head, my thots...i am happy to go into more detail abt any of these points. i love captain brady. my mans just vibing over there in ottawa and that's how the sens stay winning (the draft lottery, not games)

10 Songs on Repeat

okay, @10paper20heart wanted to know what 10 songs I’ve had on loop. I got my flu shot and covid booster today and I’m a little loopy and a whole lot tired so ignore my mistakes or embarrassing answers. None of them are embarrassing.

1. Norwegian Wood by the Beatles which is totally a boring answer BUT! my friend Vicki and I used to make ouija boards out of cardboard and try to talk to the dead while putting this song on loop (for some reason) and this is closely related to my nano story I’m working on so it gets the number 1 spot

2. Lean on Me -Club Nuveau (I totally spelled that wrong but we’re ignoring it because of the side effects). My dad was on a bowling league when I was in like, 6th grade maybe and a bunch of us kids that got dragged there would all hang out and do dumb kid stuff around the bowling alley. Anyway, this song had just come out and we collectively decided it was our favorite song and I spent the whole next week trying to record it off the radio (I’m old. We didn’t have Spotify or YouTube or anything back then) and when I finally did, I listened to it every chance I got and it still to this day makes me excited when I hear it on the radio

3. Love Eyes by Rosemary Clooney is one of the best songs you’ve ever heard in your entire life and I really think you should try to seek it out (it’s a rare one and it’s only on the Rosemary Swings Softly album. I think)

4. No Control by One Direction because listen to it!! You guys should be making mixed tape notes on all my song choices

5. Poison by Bel Biv DeVoe. Actually the whole album but it’s a song list so I had to choose one. And the choice is poison and try NOT to dance when you hear poison by bbd in the grocery store. This album came out when I was in 8th grade and it’s the only thing I listened to for like, a year. I still have the tape and the cd and a burned copy of the cd when I thought I had lost it. So two cds I suppose. Very awful lyrics, highly recommend.

6. Try Me by James Brown is my favorite James Brown song of all time. Also a really fun song to belt out in a parking lot after work with all your friends at 1am.

7. Paint it Black by The Rolling Stones is cliche but it’s a perfect song and you will deal with my decisions

8. Surfer Girl by The Beach Boys. There was a 50’s restaurant here in Denver and my friend Vicki (ouija board) and I would bring like a roll of quarters in and play surfer girl on the jukebox over and over (i know it sounds like I’m doing the John mulany bit, but I’m not this is real) and finally after months and months, no matter how many quarters we put in, they wouldn’t play surfer girl anymore. Then we moved to California and fast forward like 10 years, I’m home visiting and we went to the diner and I was like, “hmmm shall I???” And I put several quarters in and pushed the surfer girl button several times and nothing. They removed Surfer Girl from rotation. I ruined it for everyone. Then I moved back here and the restaurant had closed down. I have to assume it was because I had been keeping them in business with my Surfer Girl quarters. Your loss, Gunther Toody’s

9. Lost in Emotion by Lisa Lisa and Cult Jam. I used to roller skate to this song and it makes me happy and it’s my go to song when I want to listen to music when I’m cooking or doing the dishes or cleaning or something equally boring

10. Love Me by Elvis. When my oldest son was a toddler, he decided that Elvis was his favorite and while all the other children were watching Cars and Polar Express, he watched Blue Hawaii and GI Blues everyday an he wore a jailhouse rock jacket everywhere we went. And so I would play an Elvis cd that I found and it had this song on it and it hits me in that same spot that Try Me does. It’s perfect.

Alright I did it!!! I need to go find out if Love Eyes has finally made it to YouTube. I’ll post it if I find it

Bloodshot: ‘Sins of the Father’ Track by Track

~Doomed & Stoned Debuts~

By Billy Goate

Maryland lays claim to one of the deepest and longest running heavy music scenes in America, with luminary acts like The Obsessed, Spirit Caravan, Clutch, Black Lung, Internal Void, Alms, Spiral Grave, Iron Man, Beelzefuzz, The Hidden Hand, Revelation, and Wretched among the most widely recognized.

The latest to grace the stage at The Maryland Doom Fest: BLOODSHOT. In their debut album, 'Sins of the Father' (2022), the Free State four-piece dish out a brutal plate made of solid heavy metal, served up with heaping helpings of thrash, sludge, and doom. This recording features Jared Winegardner on vocals, with Tom Stacey helming guitar, Joe Ruthvin on bass and J.B. Matson manning the drums. Savvy readers will recognize some of these guys from such storied bands as War Injun and Earthride.

The more you listen to the record, the more it grows on you, and there's some very good reasons for that. The songs are all very accessible with earthy vocals, catchy motifs, relatable lyrics, and atmosphere that ranges from raunchy to invigorating to sinister. Truly there is life in this blood, so let's explore the album one track at a time, shall we? I've asked frontman Jared Winegardner to give us some background for the journey, as well.

1. Faded Natives

Announcing its presence with three emphatic drum beats, this aggro opener launches a salvo of crunchy, thrash-laden riffage caught in a churning undertow. You'll also get the first of several guitar solos from Tom Stacey, which are a real highlight of the album.

"Faded Natives" references a live action play I saw with my kids called 'Tecumseh.' Chillicothe, Ohio is the area where I grew up and the play is performed there every year in an outside amphitheater, which I highly recommend going to see if you're ever in that area. It’s really not a particularly complicated song to figure out and shares some kinship with another one from a couple decades ago by Anthrax: "Indians." It just seems to get more and more true as time goes on that Native Americans are fading further and further from existence.

2. Visions of Yesterday

"Visions of Yesterday" skates the edges of punk and thrash, accompanied by an urgent heartbeat and a doomy underbelly. It's a shorter number, as fleeting perhaps as our own faded reminisces of days gone by.

This song is about growing older, losing people that you love one-by-one, and doing your best to hold onto their memory and keep them alive in spirit.

3. Zero Humility

A favorite of mine from the get-go, this one wears well with repeated listens. Sporting an undeniable swagger, before you know it you'll find yourself melting right into its groovy central riff. I find myself strongly identifying with its lyrical locus, as well. "Good luck with your sanity, if you're living with me."

"Zero Humility" was written a couple years before I was with the band. It's a good example of a technique I discovered years prior, when something would piss me off and I couldn’t get it out of my head, I would write it out. At the time I just saw it as poetry or sort of like a diary, this one is definitely about the past and during a period where it seemed like the main person in my life at the time was living just to make my life hell. No better way to describe that one.

4. Uncivil Warold

Speaking of engaging thematic content, here's a song that will resonate with anyone who's ever looked at the world's military conflicts with a squint eye. There's something horribly primitive about war at its core, a regression from those higher faculties of reason, diplomacy, and clever problem solving that would otherwise distinguish us as human beings. "Millions of people, thousands of kids, countless murders, millions are spent." The repeated triplet notes on guitar, bass, and drums mime artillery fire, while Bloodshot laments: "Always in battle, no end in sight, the last place an outsider will ever make right."

"Uncivil Warold" is purposely misspelled, because the second word is a combination of "war" and "world." Being in the military gives you a different view on things, and this one started as somewhat of a commentary on wars in the Middle East. As we came close to finishing it up, the Russia invasion of Ukraine started and it fits into the same sort of mindframe. It is mostly commentary on how there are unfortunately people that think it is our country's job to teach other countries how to behave or think, and it is almost always fruitless and very expensive both monetarily and in terms of lives.

5. Beaten Into Rebellion

The compositional style and singing inflection of this number reminds me of Prong's Tommy Victor. It's got one of those choruses you can easily give a hearty hellllll yeah..

Everyone has something that seems to constantly brow beat you until you rebel against it. "Beaten Into Rebellion" is one of those songs that was unintentionally one size fits all. I think the less I say about this the better, because it would shrink the possible size and scope of meaning to people.

6. Worn And Torn

Another dirty punk-thrash number, with a stinging solo and guitar tone that feels as misty as an October shower.

"Worn And Torn" was written prior to the band. It's me in the last year or so of my marriage trying to keep it together and continually searching for reasons or things to hold onto to keep trying. Songs like this I hope people hear and connect with and find some sort of solace, knowing that they are not the only ones feeling like this or in this position.

7. Inside The Outside

Jared's vocals here seem to tap into the rebellious spirit of Nirvana's Bleach. The chorus is addictive and I suspect you will find yourself sporadically singing it whilst folding your laundry.

"Inside The Outside" started with drummer JB's band War Injun. It was a rough demo where the vocalist was sort of just getting ideas, not really any words to it. Our version turned out much different than the original. The title was based on a meme during the plague, where you were allowed to go to a restaurant and eat as long as you were outside but inside a tent, and all the other just crazy things going on in that timeframe. Another one of those songs where hopefully people hear it and adapt it to their experiences or simply enjoy it because people tell us they really dig the groove and sound.

8. Sucking Chest Wound

"Fifteen years and nothing left to say..." This is probably my favorite track of the record. It's grungy as all get-out and has another great chorus. "...with the sunset I ride."

Sucking chest wound is a military term for being shot in the guts while air is coming in and out of the wound. JB was on the money with this one. Lyrics touch on the initial shock of my ex telling me she wanted a divorce and my reaction in the period following. I enjoy playing this one just because of the blues feel (and giving me a break from the harder vocals).

9. Fyre

As we near the album's finish, Bloodshot shift into a groove metal mode. I imagine this as a fitting companion to Lamb of God's "Walk With Me In Hell," chiefly for its dense, rainy guitars and mean vocal approach.

Another purposely misspelled word, because no one could outdo the version correctly spelled by Jimi Hendrix. I wrote this shortly before the band got together, it’s commentary on when all of the 2020 riots were going on and everything seemed to continue in the direction of anarchy in one way or another. This one is kind of humorous to me, because I wouldn’t be able to perform it in a theater as I think there’s still some sort of law where you’re not allowed to yell the word “fire” in a crowded theater!

10. Sins of the Father

"This ship is going down, because you wear the crown." Things draw to a close with the somber title track, a grim reminder of the power of influence we all wield with the younger generation. Vocals are a mix of clean and dirty, accompanied by a "Bury Me In Smoke" kind of marching rhythm and some punchy bass notes. The guitar once again shines, accenting the song with steely, rhythmic nu-metal touches.

"Sins of the Father" is our deepest and most layered song, and probably what a lot of bands would consider their "baby." It was a late entry into the setlist and we named our CD after it. Just like the layering instrumentally, it also layered with meaning. As a parent you want to do your best to not sew bad seeds into your children. Whether it be bad habits or behavior, you want to live your best so they don’t inherit the dumb things that were afflicted upon you as a child. When we started, my guitarist asked me if I wrote stupid lyrics about dragons and such. I replied, “There are plenty of real monsters in the world to write about; no need to write about mythical ones.”

Sins of the Father by Bloodshot sees its wide release on September 15th via Nervous Breakdown Records (pre-order here). Stick it on a playlist with Megadeth, Prong, Corrosion of Conformity, Helmet, and Meshuggah. This is the Doomed & Stoned world premiere.

Give ear...

LISTEN: · Bloodshot - 'Sins of the Father' (Nervous Breakdown Records)

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