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Date night with myself 🫶🏻

🧡🌦️🍊🧡

Weekend Vibes ✌🏽

It's finally tolerable to be outside! 😛

Happy Saturday Friends 💚 Be Safe 💜 Enjoy a nice Cup of ☕ with me Send prayers and love your way 🙏👊🌹💛

90 days sober!!! Lots of emotions today. I want to treat myself to something but budgeting lol so I got a slice of cheesecake, gonna go home and enjoy my treat and watch some of my favorite movies :) (wish I could have gotten a Lego set but ya know lol)

She is stunning 🌹🔥

@therealannacamp IG stories (9/3/22)

Sitting at the beach, listening to some music and just enjoying the peace - best thing in the world 😇

@therealannacamp IG stories

Cheers to pour decisions🎄✨🍷

When you cup your hands just right and have just enough water in them to make a little heart shape

I've been letting myself smile more. That's different, I think, than trying to smile more, because forcing happiness on something doesn't really help anything. But if I happen to smile, for whatever reason, I don't shut it down.

I remember being so embarrassed when I was in middle school, and even high school, when I'd pass someone in the hall and say hello, and then realize in embarrassment I was still smiling after having walked another 10 paces or so. Or when I'm outside walking, and the sunshine feels nice, or I see something pretty, or a cool outfit, my natural response is to grin a little. But if anyone else is around, walking down the same sidewalk, or even just driving by, I'd harden my expression a little, so as not to appear too soft, or uncool.

But isn't that silly? Isn't it silly that we so often romanticize, dare I say fetishize, those who hold themselves to a grizzled composure, who brood and scowl and present themselves utterly unfazed by beauty and life and friendliness, those who close themselves off from simple pleasures.

I have a friend who is among the kindest, brightest souls I have ever met. She's sweet and she bursts with light, even when she's struggling or on the verge of breaking. She is pure warmth, and deserves nothing less. But she's admitted to me, on several occasions, that the men she's attracted to are that brooding type. She's attracted to bad boys, to danger, and then she gets herself hurt. And I'll admit to wanting the same, at times. I've learned to stop myself, but something about that unsmiling smoulder that mass media throws in our faces feels irresistible. It's not just men, by any means. There is a trend of toxic masculinity in the way a lot of media portrays strong, powerful women oftentimes. I'm not criticizing women who are strong, who are leaders, who are more masculine in their dress and their actions; I applaud it, and I comend it. I can comend it in men, too, where appropriate. But I feel like so often we forget the strength in happiness, in sameness, in beauty and sometimes frivolity, the strength in being tender, and in enjoying what's around us just for the sake of enjoying it. In a world where violence and destruction is glorified, where being dangerous is in vogue, isn't it incredibly brave to be happy? I wouldn't call myself a revolutionary here, but isn't smiling a far better solution than slipping into hate, or indifference?

I used to be that pick-me-girl, too cool to like flowers and pink, too cool to smile at people, too cool to be happy. If I were cool enough, apathetic enough, then maybe I'd be more attractive, more powerful, more likely to succeed. And now I think that's dog shit. It's stupid, wasting energy forcing a frown onto my face where I so naturally want to grin, stupid wide, and take everything in.

So I instead have been letting myself smile, but I let myself laugh, too, and I let myself say stupid things when I mean them, and when they aren't worth hiding. I'm not perfect at it, sure, but I'm getting better at giving compliments when I see things I like, at laughing at jokes, at being confused, at admitting when I'm wrong and picking my battles accordingly. I'll still bitch and whine and brood when appropriate, but if I don't need to, if it feels wrong to, then I stop myself. But when I'm walking down the sidewalk, feeling peaceful and happy and smiling for no reason other than I can feel the sun on my face, I don't stop myself. And I plan to continue that, too.

Cheers to the weekend

Coco-Rita

I wish I had something wise and inspirational to say but I am literally taking each day as they come …

I am trying to enjoy all the little moments before the brightness starts to fade and the darkness begins to cloud its way back in.