What your Favorite Chloé ships say about you: by someone who's sleep deprived and took one look at a post and typed.

Chlodrien: You're a sucker for childhood friends to lovers but with maximum angst, probably had a Wattpad phase or watches Asian dramas/telenovelas. Bi/Pan.

Chlobrina: No, the girl who you are crushing on for years does not know how you feel. Tell. Her. Or stop insisting it's okay that 'she only sees me as a friend as long as she's happy' for both your sakes, say something. Your crush is probably a useless lesbian as well and doesn't even know they're gay. Probably writes fanfic. Straight to lesbian land you go.

Chlolila: Enemies and lovers but it's more hating than liking. You like spice, drama and you probably have a kink. You support women's wrongs and rights but especially their wrongs. Bi/Lesbian hostility.

Chlonath: You either have a gay best friend or you are the gay best friend. Or you're bi. And an artist. wlw/mlm solidarity.

Chlolix: She was a punk, she did ballet. 'I'm not fixing her, I'm going to commit the same atrocities with her.' You like when Alix doesn't take Chloé's shit. Queer platonic bros/Lesbians unity.

Chloalya: You like independent women. You would probably hide a body without being asked. You think Ladybug is a lesbian and a goddess. Bi/Lesbian companionship.

Chlogami: LESBIANS. SWORDS. MASQUERADE BALLS. WEALTH. 'i'd stab you if you weren't so pretty right now.' Queens. Did I mention lesbians? Lesbians.

Chloluka/Lukloe: You're probably a multishipper, watches anime, has probably stanned a boy band in the past and you pin over fictional men. Bi/Bi.

Bonus but I think I'm biased:

Chloenette: Motherfuckers, what did the world do to you.

I just wanna say I respect all ships y'all are awesome, keep slaying and fuck you, asstruck.

This is causing a bit of a stir on Twitter but:

if we consider a door to be a kind of mechanical device, there must be an on state and an off state.

so.

What if acotar antagonists got the same level of justification as our 'heroes' from the Night Court did?

THE X-FILES 30th ANNIVERSARY CELEBRATION

DAY 1: favourite episodes

layout adapted from: x + x // episode descriptions via hulu

i know there's a lot of issues around prevalence of fanon interpretations of the batfamily, especially when it comes to tim, but one thing i refuse to believe no matter how many comics may try to convince me is the idea that tim drake is tall. like look at him that is just a little guy

I'm glad I get to animate this lil shit 🩷

zuko's a bottom

Can’t fully explain it but what they did to Mey-Rin in the anime was soo homophobic…

How could they do that to her... They made her straight.

Waking up orders in House of Lamentation:

cw: no proof-head, just some random thoughts, grammar errors here and there

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1/ Beelzebub - always the first one to wake up before everyone else because he’s hungry,  also because of his morning work-out routine, usually wakes up at 5 or 5:30 never later. goes to the kitchen first so he can prepares his work-out snack and has his 1st breakfast of the day. takes the advantage of waking up early to sneak into your room so you two can have some morning cuddles (sometimes just to find mammon on your bed). 

2/ Satan - this perfect man has his day scheduled duh, he has plan, he need to be perfect in order to beat Lucifer. Waking up at 6am, maybe sooner than Beel if he’s on breakfast duty (he want to make sure 1) Beel doesn’t digest all the breakfast ingredient 2) he must make better breakfast than Lucifer) . Starting his day with a cup of coffee and a good book after finishing his morning routine. He’s usually the one who goes to everyone’s room to wake everyone up, makes sure they all get to school on time so they don’t ruin the family’s reputation (which honestly is ruined at this point) by being late (also because he likes to take care for his family members but he will never admit).

3/ Lucifer - Asmodeus - Mammon: most likely to wake up at the same time. 

Lucifer: he’s not a morning person. waking up early is a no no but he has his duty. usually pulls an all nighter and then leaves early because he has works to do, also usually skips breakfast (“I don’t have time to eat breakfast” is his excuse). don’t you worry, Mammon will make his older brother eat probably, that’s his specialty. In case Lucifer has a rest day, he sleeps ’til noon and Mammon will also make sure that no one can’t in interrupt his sleep. this man never get enough sleep, so it’s not unusual to see him knocks off on his paperworks.

Mammon: he’s not Lucifer’s most trusted brother for nothing. sometimes his breakfast sucks but not always, he knows how to make a edible breakfast. usually wakes up later than Beel and Satan but most time he’s earlier than Lucifer if Lucifer finishes his works after 2 in the morning and be able to get a few hours good sleep. the other one besides satan make sure everyone eat their breakfast properly and goes to school properly (he’s the second eldest c’mon). most time when he goes to bed late the night before (because of his parties, part-time jobs or modeling gig, night out…) he ends up overslept. take a really long time to get up from bed, you or one of his brother have to drag him out of bed. 

Asmodeus - Satan wakes him up every morning, refuses to get out of bed if it's not you or Satan the one who wake him but wakes up eventually cuz he can't skip his morning bath and skin care routine (his older brother always complains but it becomes a habit for both of them now). HE HAS HIS MORNING ROUTINE AND RITUAL AND BATH AND EVERYTHING. take a really long time to prepare in the morning. also he always make sure to goes to bed before 11pm and has an at least 8-hour sleep, you know, have to get enough sleep to maintain this beautiful skin.

4/ Leviathan: first of all, he does virtual schooling. second, “one more episode/round/chapter and i go to bed then end up stay awake til 5 in the morning” type - when Beel wakes up is when he goes to sleep. can’t get out of bed. on days he doesn’t have to be at school, he wakes up at 10 and starts his virtual schooling. on days he has to be at school, Mammon and Satan will make sure he’s on time. however, he still shows up late at breakfast then has to get his breakfast at school cuz Beel eats his portion every fucking morning, 

5/ Belphegor: he’s avatar of sloth. may wakes up earlier than Levi but goes back to sleep immediately. Beel has to carry him to the dining hall to make sure he has his breakfast (and sometimes carry him to school). Doesn’t matter he wakes up early or not, he goes to school to sleep to be honest. 

okay. guys. hear me out—

Hey guys I made a new silly animatic (it's for the black sheep of MXTX's works SVSSS... :P) feat. Crazy Ex-Girlfriend

@rayshippouuchiha : posts something I have absolutely no idea about in a fandom I've never been part of

Me, absolutely not specifically seven crows in a disguise, still finding it relatable/shiny:

Also here's my cat holding still for a picture after I told her it was for Ray (betrayal lol she never does that for anyone else):

And now back to our regularly scheduled programming

dw is a mid kid's sci-fi tv show and it's quality level has been mostly entirely consistent (mid, basically, with the occasional very good episode to balance out with crimes against humanity it sometimes produces) the whole reboot, and anybody acting like the Only thing going into peoples opinions of the characters are writing preferences are either Deeply naive or are trying to hide something they know people will not take kindly to.

If I see one of y'all complaining about Shiver Simps i'm getting out the pool noodle. (was on fistbump)

Frye had popularity this time and Shiver won from pure skill in battles, so that argument is off the table.

Twst theory: the events are all canon, they just fit in a weird timeline for each character

WARNING: Spoilers for Book 7

This is because the events are happening in the dreams created by Malleus' unique magic.

This is just for fun but it always bugged me how much canon the events are. They are not mentioned in the main storyline and the main storyline doesn't really mention them.

Yesterday night I couldn't sleep so I started to thinking about the cards and remembered the groovy animation: there are the thorns covering the card. And there is the black fog (also used when Silver and the others are being trapped in the blot) when the character speaks their line. Then the thorns retract, "freeing" the character and you have the groovy.

An example of a groovy here in case you forgot/don't remember (but litteraly any card is fine): https://youtu.be/vp68GOQnE6w

It would be interesting if this was an hint that the events are just the wishes/desires of someone that became true in the reality that Malleus created. Thanks to Idia we have seen that the dream can reset itself and in general everything goes as intended by Malleus' idea of Happy Ending. It could be that the events happen when the owner is waking up/realizing something is wrong so Malleus uses a panick button and make a nice event for them in order to distract them. Or the person dreaming is just feeling silly and wants to do something different and Malleus just goes "I got you". Plus, if I am not wrong, most, if not all, event are just overall nice, there isn't too much trauma in them (but it is true I am EXTREMELY behind in reading them, I am lazy).

"But the player/us can make decision" my brother in christ, Yuu does barely anything, we are cheerleaders at best. ESPECIALLY in the events. I understand why, on a gameplay level, it is not possible for us to make decision that actively effect the story, but we at most get a line that is slightly different as a reaction. If Malleus can recreate a whole fake universe in a dream I don't see why he can't add a fake version of us to the events, he HAS created a fake Ortho for Idia, Baul and Maleanor for Lilia. He just uses the memories and/or the hopes of the dreamer to create the situation. So maybe the Yuu in the events is just how Malleus and the dreamer sees Yuu. Remember, in this theory everything is working as he intended, even "us". Yuu (player) can't affect the story because Yuu (player) is not living it, it's Malleus' version of Yuu, how HE sees Yuu. Most likely also influences by the dreamer's view. Probably more the dreamer's view of Yuu that Malleus' honestly.

I also like the idea that Malleus just add Yuu since Yuu is basically his favourite human (after Silver/right with Silver) so I can see him going "Yuu brings happyness, let's add them to the dream, it makes sense, they will help make the dream happier."

The I started to wonder: but then why doesn't he add himself to every event? Doesn't he want to be more present in everyone's life? Be invited to stuff and spend time with them? What better opportunity than this, since he is adding himself already to the entrance ceremony? My polite guess is that he knew it would become too weird for the dreamer if he suddently appeared everywhere when he was barely seen until that moment, so he decided to cast himself aside for most events to be less suspicious. Idia realizes almost immediately something is wrong thanks to the insane gatcha luck so imagine if he suddenly found Malleus everywhere? "Why are you here, you aren't supposed to be here????" it would immediately raise suspicious from everyone.

This being said, the theory is likely wrong but I had way too much fun trying to guess who would be the owner of each dream-event. So I tried to think about it and here is my results, feel free to share if you think it different! (Under the cut because it would become kilometric)

Part 1 because it has become SO MUCH LONGER than expected

Happy Beans Day - Seize the Golden Harp!

SSR Azul, SR Jade + Jack, R Cater.

Dreamer - I feel like this is easy: Azul's team won and he is free from the pain of P.E. (felt). So I feel it's pretty safe to assume it's his dream. I do believe this challange could happens also in the main story since it's a yearly tradition, but it would be fun if Azul dreamed of it and maybe changed the outcome. In the happy dream, his team won while in reality he is still stuck with the lessons (I feel your pain Azul).

Why the others are present - I wouldn't be surprised if this is just how the teams were in the main story, and Azul just changed the finale. I don't remember if the first event had the Malleus VS Lilia fight but I like to think that is the real Malleus and he was just training a little to see how much he can affects the dreams and just have a nice sparring session.

Fairy Gala ~Festival of the Spring-Calling Fairies~

SSR Leona, SR Jamil + Kalim, R Ruggie

Dreamer - This was already harder, because no I don't think being the SSR automatically means you are the dreamer. It's too easy and with event with multiple SSR it would be more complicated (plus, this game would become boring quickly). So I reread it quickly and since "Leona and Kalim were tasked by Crowley to infiltrate the Fairy Gala" I believe Kalim would be a nice fit. He is there, dancing, spending time with Jamil and getting to know Leona and Ruggie better, which I don't think he would mind!

Why the others are present - he goes everywhere with Jamil and deeply cares about him, so I can see him trying to add Jamil to the dream in any way possible to enjoy more things together. I feel he could see Leona and Ruggie as a "do not separate" situation so, of course they would come together in the dream too. The reason for "why Leona?", it's because of the "Exotic" (tho I deeply disagree with the term ofc) theme. Vil and Divus are there because they can easily be considered the best for the costumes and training in any situation.

Ghost Marriage ~Proposal of Destiny~

SSR Ace, SR Riddle + Epel, R Rook

Dreamer - well, I think we can all agree it is definitely not Idia lol. As my biggest kin, I can promise you that if I were to dream of being kidnapped I would also be also the one saving myself and I would not want to have a squad of people to come to dig my grave deeper help me. We can also all agree that, most likely, all the slapped boys are definitely not the one dreaming. I don't think Ortho would dream can he dream? of his brother being kidnapped. Sam also doesn't feel quite right. I think it is pretty safe to assume again one of the guys that got the card is the one dreaming (yes I don't feel safe assuming that this is true for all events). But then who? Riddle is off the chart because the rulesTM were almost broken and he was desperate to fix it. I guess he would dream something more peaceful that either follows the rules or completely ignore them. Rook is also off the chart, he can see beauty in everything so he would not make Eliza reject everyone if anything I see him going more for an harem ending. Also he would not let Vil's face be ruined by a slap, I think. Ace or Epel that is the question. My heart is screaming Epel just because he can let go of his frustration by fighting, and he could finally hit Vil (Eliza did it, but it would be his dream soooo). Buut my mind reminds me that Ace has dropped that he had a girlfriend that left him. Seems like a pretty big lore to drop if Epel is the one dreaming. I can't find a reason for Epel to dream about Ace telling of his romantic past. Plus if I am not wrong he is the one that in the end plays the major role of making Eliza realize her feelings. So, for as much as I would like to say Epel, I think the dreamer is Ace.

Why the others are present - for chaos. And the Drama.