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borninwinter81 · 5 months

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William Blake - an introduction for Good Omens fans

I have sent @neil-gaiman an ask regarding his feelings toward the poet/artist William Blake a couple of times, but no doubt due to the size of the poor man's inbox I haven't received a response. So I did a Google search to see if he's spoken about Blake before, and it did indeed come up with a fair few hits. I think you might enjoy seeing this Twitter post if you haven't already, the painting is from William Blake's illustrations to Paradise Lost.

It's not surprising that an author like Neil Gaiman might have an interest in Blake. A visionary from a young age, his imagination was such that he was surrounded by angels made visible in his mind's eye, and he interpreted these visions through poetry, painting and engraving, and self-printed and published many of his own works. This gave him complete freedom to say exactly what he wanted.

Though he had a passionate faith in God, he also had a deep distrust of the church as an institution, and disliked the use of religion as a means of control. This poem from "Songs of Experience" perhaps summarises his feelings best:

"I went to the Garden of Love,

And saw what I never had seen:

A Chapel was built in the midst,

Where I used to play on the green.

And the gates of this Chapel were shut,

And 'Thou shalt not' writ over the door;

So I turn'd to the Garden of Love,

That so many sweet flowers bore.

And I saw it was filled with graves,

And tomb-stones where flowers should be:

And Priests in black gowns, were walking their rounds,

And binding with briars, my joys & desires."

In his poetry there is often an incongruity with the generally accepted religious ideas of what is good and evil, Angel and Demon. In The Marriage of Heaven and Hell (there's a title that should make any GO fan sit up and pay attention) he tells us that "in the book of Job, Milton's Messiah is called Satan", signifying that he feels it is Lucifer/the devil who is the true Messiah of Paradise Lost.

He gives us The Voice of the Devil and Proverbs of Hell, and has Angels being transformed into Demons through enlightenment. He tells us that Jesus broke all of the 10 commandments, yet was still virtuous because he acted according to his own morality rather than rules.

The god-figure of his later works, Urizen, generally comes across as malevolent, seeking to bind and control, whilst Los, the Satan/Messiah figure represents freedom, imagination and creativity.

"Restraining desire" and acting contrary to your own nature seem to be the only real evils for Blake.

He expressed his faith through a love of the world and the beauty in it, summed up in this quote:

"When the Sun rises do you not see a round Disk of fire somewhat like a Guinea? O no no I see an innumerable company of the Heavenly host crying Holy Holy Holy is the Lord God Almighty".

He saw "God" in everything, in all the wonders we have around us, and considered writers/poets and religious prophets as essentially the same, since they both have a connection to the divine, and express it through stories.

It's quite ironic that probably his most famous poem, Jerusalem (the one that starts "and did those feet in ancient times walk upon England's mountains green"), was made into a very popular church hymn, yet it is supposed to be satirical in nature. The poem recounts the myth that Jesus may have visited England in his boyhood, and Blake is expressing his disbelief at that notion and the unworthiness of England.

Did I have a point to all this? Mostly to show my hand as a massive Blake nerd, but also to hopefully demonstrate that there's a lot of common ground between his ideas and those expressed in a show/book like Good Omens, and hopefully to inspire some of you who may not be familiar with Blake to seek him out. In particular I'd recommend The Marriage of Heaven and Hell to any and all.

EDIT: I should have thought to include this, here's Michael Sheen reading a Blake poem. I have the CD this is from, he reads several by Blake, as well as other poets I love ❤️ 😍

youtube

#william blake #good omens #good omens book #good omens 2 #good omens s3 #neil gaiman #crowley #aziraphale #english literature #literature #poetry #go2 #good omens s2 #good omens season 2 #book omens #michael sheen #Youtube

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heavenlyraindrops · 1 month

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♱ Father Forgive Me (For I have Sinned) ~Chapter Nine ♱

Lucifer Morningstar x Angel!Reader Fandom: Hazbin Hotel Chapter Nine Warnings: profanity Click on the first tag to see all the other chapters, teasers and Masterlist. The Masterlist doesn’t work anymore, but I will still be updating it to let people know how many chapters have been published so far, and updating my taglist on it.

♱Where the purest soul in Heaven falls for the Devil♱

[Chapter Nine]

“Suuuuugar tits!”

You flinched as Adam burst into your living room, the door banging against the wall. You scowled as Emily scooted closer towards you, wings stiffening as a reflex.

“What?”

He leaned against the doorframe. “Need to talk to you. Updates on ourâ€¦” his eyes flicked to Emily. “Situation.”

You blinked, baffled. “What situation?”

Emily’s face had set hard, as if she was trying her best to hide her distaste. You glanced at her, then back at Adam, who was blinking at you pointedly. Extermination, he mouthed. Secret. You cleared your throat.

“Emily, it’s best you leave so me and Adam can talk.” You ushered her past the man, and out the door. She looked confused, then stood out the door, her eyes drifting between the both of you suspiciously.

“What’s going on?”

“Nothing, love.”

“Are you getting together, or something?” A crease formed at the top of her nose, her eyebrows pulling downwards.

“No.”

“Yes,” Adam said at the same time. You looked at him and glared. He shrugged. “Worth a try.”

After Emily had left you stood in front of him, planting your heels firmly and glaring as hard as you could. “So. What do you want with me, exactly?”

Adam laughed, the sound harsh and forgiving, as if he knew something about you that was meant to remain secret. Rummaging in his robes, he pulled out a scroll.

“Guess, what, bitch?” He cackled, thrusting it in your face. “They let me.”

You blinked. “Let you what?”

He tapped the paper. “Reduce the wait between the exterminations. We’re due back down there in six months.”

You could feel your mouth hang slightly open as he jumped up and down with glee, until you snapped out of it, your vision focusing again- specifically, on the paper. Haphazardly scrawled across it in bold lettering was:

Fuck you, I do what I want.

You tore it out of his hands, staring at it in shock. “You’ve gotta be kidding me.”

“Nope.” He snatched it out of your hands again.

You gulped. “Are you sure this is a good idea, Adam?”

“Don’t fuckin’ care what kinda idea it is.” He leaned closer. You took a step back. “Speaking of which. Who the fuck are you to tell me what’s a good idea or not?”

You blanched at his change in tone. The smile had disappeared off of his face. “I- what?”

His smile grew. “A certain someone saw a certain someone hanging out with a certain someone,” he said, in a singsong voice.

“Uh. What.”

Your heart pounded against your ribcage, threatening to burst out of your chest as he circled you. “One of my girls saw you-“ he jabbed a finger at your chest, which you batted away. “Fly to fuckin’ Lucifer’s place, on a fuckin’ balcony, and go inside with him.”

“Really?” You said, managing to keep your voice level. “And which girl was this, exactly?”

“Doesn’t matter, does it?” He raised his hands. “Cause she’s fuckin’ disappeared.”

“What do you mean, disappeared?”

“Dead! Gone! Missing! For fuck’s sake, you really don’t get it, do you?”

You clenched your fists. “If she’s missing, then how did she tell you thatâ€¦ lie?”

He lunged at you, and you jumped back as he pinned you to the wall, your collar bunched up in his fist. “She’s dead, and you’re accusing her of lying?” He shook you. “She didn’t ever lie. Got it?” He released you, and you stumbled away. “She reported it to me mid-extermination, before she went missing.”

You scowled at him. His eyes went to your neck. You touched it.

Your collar had ridden down, exposing the proof of yesterday’s activities. You quickly tried to pull it up, to no use.

“Great,” he said, his voice dripping venom. “You fucked him, didn’t you?”

“No, I did not.”

“Sure,” he snapped, hand lashing out to smack the wall. You flinched, but tried to make yourself seem collected.

“So, [name],” he said, smiling at you sarcastically. “Our great, pure, holy [name]. What’s stopping me from telling Sera?” He stepped forward. “Anything to offer me?”

Your heart sank. “Are you blackmailing me?”

He shrugged, inspecting his nails. “Call it what you want. But here’s a deal.” His hand fell back to his side. “I’ll give you until the day after the next extermination- six months. You decide whether you marry me, and I’ll keep your secret, or you choose not to and I’ll make sure you have a special place for you down in Hell when you fall.”

You felt like you were about to vomit. “You’re insane.”

“I prefer opportunist.” He swept past you, then paused at the door. “I have a meeting with Hell to arrange. Bye bye.” He smiled at you, scrunching up his eyes and waving to you like you were a child- a gesture to mock you. You clenched your fists as the door slammed shut.

Shaking, you went to your kitchen and pressed your palms against the countertop to steady yourself. Six months left.

“Fuck,” you muttered.

♱♱♱

You dragged your hands across your face, still tangled in your bedsheets. Your eyes drifted to the clock- it was almost noon. You groaned, hearing an insistent knocking on your front door.

You heard the front door open.

“[name]?”

Lute.

You shot up out of bed, scrambling to get to the living room. Lute was standing there, in full uniform- shoulders back, back straight and hands clasped behind her, her helmet’s horns curling upwards.

“What?” You grumbled, picking your way across your messy living room. You could feel her eyes following you, trained on your back.

“We just got back from our meeting in Hell,” Lute said as you stirred some chocolate powder into a cup of milk.

“Good for you.”

Lute stepped over a discarded book as she walked towards you. “Things have gone as planned. We just decided to let you know.”

“Why?” You snapped, unable to keep the harshness of the stress that had been pressing down on you out of your voice.

“Because you’re just as involved in the exterminations as the rest of us. Even though you’re not supposed to be.”

You took a sip, peering at her over the rim. “Kay,” you said flatly. She rolled her eyes.

“That’s not the only thing. Adam wanted to know if you were coming with for the next one.”

You tried to imagine looking Adam in the face before flying into the red sky, knowing that he now knew your secret. You shuddered. You shrugged.

“I don’t know yet.”

Lute nodded, slowly, then cast her gaze across your absolute mess of a house. “Are youâ€¦ okay?” She looked at you again. You stared at her blankly. “You don’t- well- you’re not usually like this-“ she waved her arm at the mess, and then at you. Your messy hair and eye bags. What she said was an understatement.

You stared at her for a moment, then set your cup down.

“Get out,” you said, voice hard. She looked at you, expressionless, then bowed her head.

“Right,” she muttered. “Goodbye.” She walked towards the door, with you in tow.

You shut the door in her face. ♱♱♱

Taglist: @boredlime, @ica1, @tremendoushearttaco, @sweetadonisbutbetter, @lucky-flowey,@kitty-kei, @thornwolfy235, @w31rd3rg1rl, @marxo5, @lvstyangel, @brainz00, @lukerycyja-reblogs, @dickmastersworld,@everlastprime259-blog, @rain-doll401-blog, @bakugounuggets, @ren-ren23, @mjhehe09,@angelicwillows, @rayyrayysanchez, @luleck, @dellugh-shposts, @rebecca-hvnstn, @l0v3lyx, @ravenswritingroom, @rattyrattyratty, @lovayle, @relatedsoda, @cimadreamer, @valckenaux

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animeyanderelover · 14 days

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Can I request Fyodor, Jōno, Sigma, Tetchō, Yuki, and Kyo with a darling that enjoys solidarity? Pls and thank you❤️

Glad that I asked you before publishing this. For everyone’s information, it was meant to say that the darling enjoys solitude.

Tw: Yandere themes, toxic relationship, possessive behavior, obsession, delusional behavior, manipulation, abduction, isolation

Tags: @shumidehiro @leveyani @izanami78 @flaming-vulpix

Darling enjoys solitude

Fyodor Dostoevsky

🍎Everything in life has its good and its bad aspects about it and the same concept applies to your preferences for solitude. On the positive side, it is quite delightful to have you already self-isolating all by yourself as Fyodor can keep very easily an eye out for you. But where is the fun? He is a terrible person who believes himself to do God's work yet the diabolical things he does surpass even the deesd committed by the devil himself. Fyodor sees it as a necessity to break you and shape you into someone new and he can't help but think that it might be less amusing to watch your life crumbling away as you prefer your solitude over the company of other people. Nevertheless, if you should be someone who is less prone to show your feelings very easily, he sees it more as a challenge than anything else to see how far he must go to finally shatter you to your core. It is a sick and twisted way of thinking but it is a deed that has to be done. After all you deserve all the suffering he is about to unleash on you.

Jouno Saigiku

♦️Your preference to spend time alone is much appreciated and welcomed by Jouno who has always been far too possessive to let other people close to you. Whenever he seeks you out, he finds you most of the time alone and enjoys the fact that he can have your attention and company all for himself most of the time. Although it does increase his spite for the people you do actually keep close as he knows that they are very special to you if you bother to hang out with them. You are a fairly calm and composed person who enjoys their quietness and that is reflected in the relaxed composition of your heartbeat. As someone who can pick up on the emotions of others easily due to his enhanced senses, this only aids further in Saigiku's obsession as your emotions don't overwhelm him. Although similar to Fyodor he still has a sadistic streak and sometimes might try to trigger your emotions to go haywire to satiate his own desire. Your racing heartbeat is lovely to listen to at times after all.

Suehiro Tetchou

🌸Tetchou is fairly normal for someone who has an unhealthy obsession going on but if you compare him to people like Saigiku, it should be no surprise. On the other hand he is quite dense at times and may make wrong assumptions which is unfortunately what happens in your case. He assumes that your preference to be alone is because you have social anxiety, even if that may simply not be the case. Growing from this hasty assumption of his, he grows more protective over you to the point where he actually ends up isolating you even if you want to spend time with others. Convinced that he is doing you a favor, he ends up taking over every social interaction of yours as you aren't even allowed to order something from the staff in a restaurant as he instead insists on doing so for you. It may not look like much but it can very much turn into a smothering overprotective behavior where your social skills drastically reduce themselves due to the social isolation he puts you through.

Sigma

☁️You give him almost constantly anxiety due to your withdrawn personality which has him actively struggling out of fear that you'd be annoyed if he would attempt to talk with you. He doesn't want you to direct any negative feelings his way as he is much too sensitive for that so instead Sigma starts stalking and spying on you to collect as much information about you as possible. Knowledge is a weapon after all and he hopes that by finding out more about you, he can find a suitable way to approach you without getting on your nerves. He is most likely overthinking it all yet it's not like someone could just explain this to him. He does learn to appreciate it more later on as he can spend all of his time alone with you without having to worry about you expressing unhappiness about the isolation due to your preference os being alone. As foolish as it may be, he even has high hopes that you will forgive him the abduction he is currently planning as you have never been a fan of being under people to begin with.

Sohma Yuki

🐭Yuki has been admiring you from a distance for a long time yet for multiple reasons he has never approached you before. Sometimes he wonders if you are someone like him though as he often sees you all by yourself, not bothering to mingle with other students. He wishes to talk with you yet his low self-confidence and his popularity have always kept him from doing so. When he eventually gathers the courage to seek you out and start a conversation with you, he only finds himself falling more for you. He feels comfortable and safe in your presence and the fact that most of the time you are by yourself only aids his secretly possessive side as he claims that time alone he has with you. Yuki quickly learns where he can find you when he feels the need to see you and sees it through that no one follows him so that no one can disturb the time he wants to have with you for himself. Things take a bad turn when he finds himself dependent on you though whenever he feels anxious or very stressed, leading him to suffer from a mental breakdown when he can't find you anywhere.

Sohma Kyo

🐈Kyo may not show it but he feels initially worried when he catches you most of the time away from others, instead sitting all by yourself. He wonders if people don't like you or if you are very anxious yet he soon comes to realise that you just simply prefer to be by yourself. It does give him relief to know that he has nothing to worry about yet it also makes it more difficult to approach you, even though he has sworn to not get to know you due to the deal he made with Akito. The heart does what it wants though and so he finds himself commonly hiding from your sight as he watches how you spend time by yourself, reading a book or doing some work for school. It isn't enough to quench the longing in his heart yet he reminds himself that staying away from you is for the best. Kyo is very protective though and whenever he overhears someone calling you weird for always being alone, he reacts defensive and brash as he lashes out on the students for talking about you like this.

#yandere bungo stray dogs #yandere bungou stray dogs #yandere fyodor #yandere fyodor dostoevsky #yandere jouno #yandere jouno saigiku #yandere tetchou #yandere suehiro tetchou #yandere sigma #yandere fruits basket #yandere furuba #yandere yuki #yandere sohma yuki #yandere kyo #yandere sohma kyo #yandere x reader #bungo stray dogs x reader #fruits basket x reader

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srbachchan · 2 months

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DAY 5879

Jalsa, Mumbai Mar 23/24, 2024 Sat/Sun 10:23 AM

🪔 ,

March 24 .. birthday greetings to Ef AMIT Trivedi .. 🙏🏻🚩❤️

March 24 .. World TB Day .. prayers .. 🙏🏻

Spending the time with the words of Babuji is not just an education but a revelation of a poet's mind and soul .. a mind that wanders in the visionary hemisphere unknown and unseen in a relative World, but yet possessing the intelligence of the probability of a higher philosophy ..

For it all to come to me now , is a shame .. a shame of lost opportunity and time to have been spent in the research and his presence to be able to understand the deeper meanings in his thought ..

I did on the odd occasion give intent of his interpretation and reason for many of his thoughts .. and they were most revealing .. but then .. time passed away .. as did his presence ..

It is a known and accepted fact that genius of creative art, writing, painting, music or whatever form, has always been overlooked and never given its due during the lifetime of the artist .. and it has been recognised fact of this phenomena that coerces me to, yet again , mention here for consumption of the mass ..

A pity ..

But the efforts of time , or whatever is left in it for me , shall endeavour to give some exposure to Babuji's works and his incredible genius ..

The World has very seldom seen or experienced the greatness of such ..

Last night I spent time on one such random thought of his from a published work :

नई से नई, पुरानी से पुरानी

it contains works of his in short verses, or abstract from , blank verse - short and expressive , but of immense value for us all to think and wonder of how certain thoughts and the express of them , do get created ..

The title of the Poem :

KAVI KA RAKT .. A POETS’ BLOOD

meri band mutthiyaan dekhkar .. seeing my closed fists jis-jis ne mujhse poocha, .. all those that asked me “ismein kya hai” ? .. ‘what is inside them’ ? maine imaandaari se bataya , .. i told them with all honesty “ismein kya hai ? .. ‘what is in them ismein kadamb ka phool hai “ .. in them is the kadamb flower ? "(Neolamarckia cadamba, with English common names burflower-tree, laran, and Leichhardt pine,[2] and called kadam or cadamba[2]) aur logon ne is par .. and the people on this sahaj vishwaas kar liya .. did keep their instinctive believe

vo to jab .. that is, when meri mutthiyaan se .. from my clenched fists rakt ki boondein choone lagein .. drops of blood did start to drop tab logon ne mujhe avishwaas ki nazaron se ghoora, .. then, did the people did stare at me in disbelief mujhse kaha .. and they told me “mutthiyaan to kholo ।” "at least open your fists" aur jab maine mutthiyaan kholein .. and when I did open my clenched fists to unmein .. in them kantkeela dhature ka pahal nikala । .. did come out the thorn laden datura fruit !

(Datura is a genus of nine species of highly poisonous, vespertine-flowering plants belonging to the nightshade family. They are commonly known as thornapples or jimsonweeds, but are also known as devil's trumpets. Other English common names include moonflower, devil's weed, and hell's bells.)

main sharmaya, .. I was ashamed mera jhoot pakda gaya ,.. my lie was caught mujhe apne par aashcharya hua, .. I was filled with wonder , kyunki maine apni ankhein kholkar .. because I had with my open eyes kadamb ka phool apni mutthiyon mein liya tha । .. taken the kadamb flower in my clenched fists !

shayad mai apni bhavatishayata mein ।.. perhaps in the belief of my aatma , the self , the soul kante ko phool samjha, .. I thought the thorns to be a flower par kaanta , kaanta hi kaise reh gaya , .. but how did the thorn , remain a thorn phool kyun nahin bana , .. why did it not become a flower usnein toh ek kavi ka rakt piya tha । .. it had consumed the blood of a poet !!

the word भावा ति शय यता , bhavatishayyata seems to have been taken from a form of the mention in the scriptures of Hindu philosophy, saints and religion , which is why i believe it refers to his aatma, his soul , his inner .. perhaps a more 'cultured way' 😁 of expressing his thoughts ..

DATURA

KADAMB .. CADAMBA 👆🏼

My love and more ..

Amitabh Bachchan

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highpriestessarchives · 3 months

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Know Thyself: How This One Exercise Shaped My Writing

“Know Thyself” Interpretations

Heraclitus: “It belongs to all men to know themselves and think well.”

Charles H. Kahn: this fragment echoes a traditional belief that “know thyself" had an essentially similar meaning to the second Delphic maxim, “nothing too much;” both sayings might be considered alternative ways of describing the virtue of sophrosyne.

Heraclitus defines sophrosyne as the art of “perceiving things according to their nature,” apparently referring to the perception of objective, material facts. If so, and if self-knowledge is the same as sophrosyne, then, as Kahn writes, “the deepest structure of the self will be recognized as co-extensive with the universe in general … so true self-knowledge will coincide with knowledge of the cosmic order.”

A fragment from Ion of Chios provides the earliest explicit reference to the maxim. It reads: “This ‘know yourself’ is a saying not so big, but such a task Zeus alone of the gods understands.”

“The unexamined life is not worth living” -Socrates

Soliloquies of Augustine: The book has the form of an “inner dialogue" in which questions are posed, discussions take place and answers are provided, leading to self-knowledge. The first book begins with an inner dialogue which seeks to know a soul. In the second book it becomes clear that the soul Augustine wants to get to know is his own.

The Consolation of Philosophy: Boethius writes The Consolation of Philosophy as a conversation between himself and a female personification of philosophy, referred to as “Lady Philosophy.” Philosophy consoles Boethius by discussing the transitory nature of wealth, fame, and power (“no man can ever truly be secure until he has been forsaken by Fortune"), and the ultimate superiority of things of the mind, which she calls the “one true good.” She contends that happiness comes from within, and that virtue is all that one truly has because it is not imperiled by the vicissitudes of fortune.

Meditations: Marcus Aurelius likely didn’t intend for Meditations to be published, as the work centered around his own self-analysis and self-guidance. Aurelius advocates finding one's place in the universe and sees that everything came from nature, and so everything shall return to it in due time. Another strong theme is of maintaining focus and to be without distraction all the while maintaining strong ethical principles such as “Being a good man.”

...to think that all of these classic works are “regular” people figuring themselves out. I decided to do the same.

Writing My Own “Soliloquy”

I’d like to clarify that I, in no way shape or form, see myself as this great thinker or philosopher or anything like that. I recognize that this practice is but one way to understand myself, especially since I struggle with mental health and a lot of spiritual questions (but that’s another topic).

In choosing to write my own soliloquy, I am becoming my own Devil’s Advocate. Like Boethius, I’ve decided to structure my journaling as if I am arguing with someone. I will choose a topic that I am passionate about or that I am having my own crisis over, such as “Why do I not believe I am a good person?” or “Why do I prefer logic over emotion?” or even “What draws me to classical paintings?”

What I found is that anything and everything that I am attached to says something about me on a deeper level.

Here is where it gets a little tricky: in continuing to argue with myself, I’ve found that I get better at coming up with counter points. In other words, this self-analysis becomes more and more complex the more used to it you get. It’s almost like you’re playing some mind chess and this fictional opponent, who is also you, as they are but your own Devil’s Advocate, is also getting better and learning with you.

But, to me, that is what makes this “Know Thyself” maxim important. You are not meant to have a full-fledged answer. We are constantly evolving and changing, as will our knowledge of how we perceive ourselves and how we perceive the world in response to it.

How It Affects My Writing

To start with the obvious, the character development and creation changes so much when you get to know yourself. At least, for me, the world becomes less and less black and white (not that it ever was black and white to begin with). Because of that, my characters become more dimensional.

I am no longer afraid to write controversy. There is a... debate, for a lack of better words, on the media literacy rate nowadays. Because of this, I would fear that, just because I wrote about it, people would assume that I am in support of it; or, for example, just because there is a mainstream focus on one demographic, that nuances of that focus cannot be written about (again, another topic).

However, writing my soliloquies reminds me that my work is meant to be a message from myself to the audience first and entertainment second.

As artists, authors, creators, etc., there is a danger in losing ourselves to appease the masses. There is the question of whether we should create what we want or stick to what is trending, and I’m not immune to that spiral, either.

In knowing yourself, you become your #1 advocate. You know what your boundaries are, what your morals are, and what your values are. It gets harder to allow those who don’t do that same work to sway your pen.

Closing Words

Whatever form that takes, get to know yourself. For me, that’s journaling whenever I can as if I’m debating with someone. Grab a journal meant specifically for this exercise and go crazy! No one’s going to read it (unless you become someone like Marcus Aurelius and your own version of Meditations comes out. In which case... sorry?)

Never stop challenging the way you think, too. It can be uncomfortable and hard, but change always is. Perhaps you will stick to your ideals, and that’s okay, too! Do not live life on the easy path.

As always, these exercises are not a substitute for professional or medical help. I will always encourage those who need it to seek therapy, as I believe it is a great tool to use alongside this exercise, should one feel inclined to do so.

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moonpedri · 1 year

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game over.

summary: meeting your ex at your friend's birthday party was the last thing you wanted, yet you somehow couldn't stay away from him.

pairing: pedri x reader

genre: fluff (sort of?), suggestive

warnings: none really, just a bit of toxic/fuckboy!pedri, making out

word count: 2.2k

a/n: this is my first fic i ever published. I hope you enjoy reading as much as I did writing!! <3 (not proof-read)

────────────

The music around you is loud, blaring through the speakers. The people in front of you dance to their hearts content, watching them as you sit on the sofa somewhere in the corner of the room. You lean back and laugh at the birthday boy in the middle of it all, moving like rent was due tomorrow morning.

Sira joins in at her boyfriend's antics.

Tonight was Ferran's birthday. And as with every birthday of his, he liked to go all out. Especially with the house parties. Especially especially because it was his first one in Barcelona, having spent the last one in Manchester. He was happy to be back in Spain and more so to play for one of the biggest clubs in the world.

It has always been a childhood dream of his and by extent yours too. The two of you grew up together in Valencia and always dreamed of living in the big city up north. You for your studies and him for the football. You managed to leave first, enrolling into the University of Barcelona. Ferran took a little detour to England before joining you 2 years later. It was one of the best news you have ever received.

Both you and Sira helped preparing this party and you are happy that so far everything went well. You still aren't sure how Ferran knew so many people in the short time he has been here in Barcelona but the house is filled up to the last bit - which worried you at first but, oh well.

It wasn't up to the ideal athlete lifestyle either, but who followed that nowadays anyways? It was his birthday and they don't have any important games in the next few days. Though maybe training's going to be a pain in the ass tomorrow, but that didn't have anything to do with you.

You focus on the crowd in front of you again.

Next to Ferran is another figure, one that was quite familiar to you. You two lock eyes for a split second before you turn your head away. Displeased, you take a sip of your drink.

Sira, who noticed immediately, looks at you with a smirk on her lips. "Have you still not talked it out?"

You sigh, "There is nothing to talk out really."

She hums, "Hm, sure. That's why you two always look like you want to make out and rip each other's throat out at the same time."

"Sounds kinky.", you say, not adding anything more and take another sip. You really didn't want to talk about him. Sira on the other hand suddenly takes great interest in the topic.

"__, come on. This can't go on like this forever. You know what always worked whenever Ferran and I fought? The jealousy card."

You look at her exasperated, "Are you trying to give me relationship advice right now? We didn't fight, we ended things, Sira. I don't want him back."

"Then stop looking at him like every two seconds."

You hadn't even noticed. You groan, "I'm going to get myself another drink." And with that you hurry to the kitchen. Far far away from Sira and her stupid advices. She calls after you, but you ignore her.

Yeah, okay. Maybe you looked at him like what, two times? So what. You haven't seen him in a while, of course you were a bit curious. That was only human, right? After all, you had a right to be curious.

Annoyed that you think about him again, you open the door to the kitchen only to be greeted by the devil himself; and apparently an accomplice of his as well, as some girl was clinging to his arm.

A curse almost leaves your mouth at the sight.

Pedri.

He looks good, he always does. His face was freshly shaved and his dark locks frame his face oh so perfectly. He wore a dark T-Shirt that highlighted his toned upper-body, it was truly unfair how attractive he was right now.

At the sight of you, the blonde girl next to him dugs her long nails deep into his biceps. She is pretty, you notice quickly, which just makes the whole situation worse.

You stand there for second, thinking. As much as you want to, leaving was absolutely not an option. You wouldn't give him the satisfaction. You want Pedri to know that you don't care about him anymore, just like what he said to you all those weeks ago.

So, you straighten your back and squeeze past them and straight towards the fridge. You hear the girl scoff behind you, probably annoyed that you interrupted whatever they planned on doing. Trying to seem unbothered, you open the fridge and lean down to grab one of the energy drinks stored at the bottom. You could have kneeled down too, but maybe you wanted Pedri to see. The dress you wore was short, barely covering your ass. And seeing this girl in his arms, alone in the kitchen, irks you for some reason.

She could never be you, and you wanted to remind Pedri of that.

You could feel his eyes on you, "I know that I was the best thing that probably ever happened to you, and that you miss me, but did you really have to follow me all the way back to the kitchen?", he says and the girl next to him giggles. It makes your blood boil. Who does he think he is?

You turn around, just in time to catch him checking out your ass, and smile at him, "You're so full of yourself, it's actually disgusting, you know?"

He pretends to think, "I've heard those word a few times before, yes. In a different context though."

Oh, how you hate him. You detest him so so much, and yet it makes something churn in your stomach. "I hate you.", is all you say before you leave the kitchen. You believe to hear a "Likewise" leave his mouth. Bastard.

Maybe Sira was right. The jealousy card worked, but not how you wanted to. Not on him, but on you. Somehow the thought of leaving Pedri alone with that blonde bitch irritates you. It enrages something deep within you. And you want to turn the tables.

Without really thinking too much about it, you move your way into the middle of the dance floor, grab some guy's hand and move your hips like you were on the broadway. Like you were Britney fucking Spears.

Two could play this game. You chuck down the last bit of your energy drink and move in-between all these sweaty bodies. It may looked wrong but it felt good to let loose.Lost in both music and thoughts, you suddenly someone bump into you. You recognize the brown locks immediately.

Pablo Gavira. A very close teammate of Pedri and possibly his best friend.

You met him a little bit later than Pedri but nevertheless considered him a pretty good friend of yours - even after everything that happened.

"Oh, sorry- __, hey."

"Hey.", you say and involve him in some small talk. You haven't seen him in quite some time either. Due to the loud noises though, the two of you were forced to talk to each other in close approximity. Not that you complained, he is an attractive guy, you just never saw him that way.

Gavi knew his boundaries, you both knew them. And you don't think he was interested you in that way either. However a little fun never hurt anyone, right?

You tucked Gavi a little closer and moved your hips against his. Your hands hold firmly onto his shoulders and to anyone around you it may have seemed like there was definitely more going on between you two.

To Gavi and you, though, it's nothing. It's fun. If Gavi knows what your true intentions are, he doesn't show it.

You catch movement from the left side of your eye. Pedri and the girl stand in a group of people now, talking and chatting with each other. You recognize Sira and Ferran to be part of them.

Sira spots you first and smiles mischievously. Next to her, Pedri now turns your way as well. He furrows his brow immediately and you look back to Sira, who is signaling something to you. You understand, of course. Giving in into her "advice", you grab around Gavi's neck and push your chest against his. As Gavi's hands wander down slowly, you lean in closer to his face.

But Pablo wasn't stupid. He knew exactly what you were doing. "And here I thought you just wanted to spend some quality time with me.", he whispers into you ear, acting fake-hurt by your actions. You reckon that he is joining in on this little game you are playing, knowingly playing with fire too.

Innocently, you reply, "Am I not?"

"Hm, are you not?", he asks and tucks a loose strand of hair behind your ear.

You laugh, "Who knows," his hand is now on your lower back, ",but I have to admit you're surprisingly good at this."

"Ah, now you're hurting my feelings for real. Why is that surprising?"

"I don't know, I just didn't expect it I guess. You never gave me an opportunity to think otherwise.", you say and the tips of your noses almost touch.

It was mindless chit-chat really. To anyone looking from outside though, it definitely was not just mindless chit-chat; which is exactly what you wanted. You look over to your left, dark brown eyes boring directly into you. You can't decipher the look on Pedri's face; but it isn't difficult to point out that it's not positive. You grin at him and watch as his jaw clenches.

Right then, Gavi turns your face to him, index finger under your chin. "Well, at least you know now.", he glances behind you and chuckles, "He's going to kill me later, but for now good luck."

He lets go and suddenly a large hand circles around your waist and pulls you back. You hate the way you lean into the touch unconsciously; how your body responds quicker than your brain and recognizes it straight away.

Gavi winks at him (or you, you're not sure to be honest) and turns back to the crowd.

"Game over, princess.", Pedri whispers into your ear. Goosebumps spread all over your body. "You think I don't know what you're up to? I'm not stupid."

"So why are you here then?"

He lays his hands on your hips and spins you around. His face is impossibly close, "Because you're a fucking minx and it's annoying me."

You look at him unimpressed, "Fuck off, Pedri."

His tight grip on you prevents you from leaving. Pedri grabs your jaw, "That was your plan all along, wasn't it? Getting me all riled up, try making me jealous with my best friend out of everyone."

"So what?", you look up at him. And he only stares back. You could have pretended to be innocent, but you were done. You wanted to lay all cards open. He couldn't do anything about it, you weren't his.

"I thought you hated me?"

"I do."

"Yeah?"

You hum, "So much." You haven't realized how close he was to you now, your lips only inches apart.

Pedri looks at them for a split moment. Then his eyes wander down your body and it takes everything in you to not buckle under his gaze. You remind yourself that you were strong, not weak. You wanted to leave him high and dry, show him that he couldn't find anyone better than you. But that task proved itself to be harder than you initially thought.

So you tug him forward by the hem of his pants and pull him down by his neck, clawing at it almost. "And did my plan work?", you breathe against his mouth.

Pedri's lips on yours are the only confirmation you need.

He kisses you with force and so much desperation and frustration. You did with just as much. It's been too long.

His hands roamed your body, stopping at your ass. It hurt to admit how much you missed him on you. He squeezes the flesh of your butt, pulling you into him and you gasp into his mouth. "God, I missed you so much.", he roans.

You don't know how long you continued to make out, exploring each other as if it was your first time.

Only when someone bumps into you, the two of you part. You feel your heart beat hard against your chest. Stil trying to steady your breath, you look at him - unsure on how to proceed. But your lord and savior, in the form of Ferran, saves you from the awkwardness

"Pedri!", he calls him over. The boys are gathered in a group, and whatever they managed to do, they wanted to show Pedri.

He looks over to them, signaling them that he's coming.

He turns to you with a smirk. "We should definitely repeat that.", Pedri winks and caresses your face. He leaves a soft kiss on your cheek before leaving. His actions and words didn't match, which confuses you even more. But that was a problem for another time.

For now, you just bite your lip and smile after him. "Yeah.", is all you manage to say.

────────────

check out my masterlist for more! 🤍

#pedri x reader #pedri fanfic #pedri one shot #pedri fluff #pedri imagine #pedri gonzalez #football fanfic #football imagine #football x reader #fic: game over #moonpedri

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queersatanic · 7 months

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Hello !!! 💖 I'm a young satanist trying to figure out how to properly worship and live the lifestyle, but with all the Nazism and such that satanism is infected with, I'm a bit lost as to where to turn for good information that's not gonna accidentally get me on board with ideas that have nasty shit hidden in the shadows of them. Are there any good books/organizations I can look into or just some general tips? <3

We have a certain perspective on this, so bear that in mind.

What is attractive about Satanism as a concept is not really the "might is right" ideology of Anton LaVey and its worship of social stratification, and it's not The Satanic Temple's pyramid-shaped classical liberalism / Gen X trolling.

Rather, it's taking the idea that even if the story of Christian mythology were true, Satan is still the hero for looking at an omnipotent tyrant and that tyrant's proposed immutable hierarchy for the universe but choosing to rebel and grant people agency over their own lives.

And it's the idea that if the Christians say we are demonic or of the devil's party for being queer or seeking the common good of all people, well, then we're with the devil and down to party.

For that reason, anarchism is more central to Satanism than wearing black or lighting candles, even though the aesthetics are what distinguish it from other strains.

From that, Errico Malatesta is a good place to start because he wrote for a long time and focused on pamphlet-style works that could make sense to a typical person, rather than academics.

Malatesta is easy to read, and still relevant in lots of ways because he lived through so much and lived his ideals (famously, for example, refusing to talk to the cops after he was shot by a fellow anarchist over an ideological dispute).

"The ABCs of Anarchism" by Alexander Berkman is also a good introductory work for establishing fundamental values and why.

You also can listen to that one as an audio book over at Audible Anarchist.

Note that both of those are straight white men, and the "mainstream" of anarchism has often had a problem of failing to recognize or live by principles of opposing all hierarchies, including white supremacy and cishetero-patriarchy. The fact that anarchist Becky Edelsohn "dated" Berkman when she was 16 and he 36 (and that this was supported by Berkman's previous partner Emma Goldman) is one example of this. Mikhail Bakunin gave us one of the best quotes of all time regarding anarcho-satanism ("But here steps in Satan, the eternal rebel, the first freethinker and the emancipator of worlds"); Bakunin was also a racist.

Other people can give better advice and examples, but Indigenous Anarchism, Black Anarchism, Anarkata, Queer Anarchism, and Anarcha-Feminism are all areas that a person needs to put work into in order to undo the kyriarchy — the whole structure of interconnected systems of oppression we're indoctrinated into and subjected to.

"But what does that have to do with Satanism?" Mainly it's to help you spot when something you come across is engaging in the sort of hierarchical, fascistic, or even neo-Nazi ideas that LaVeyan Satanism and its offshoots have always had connected with them. They're not always obvious, and having good principles established is the best immunization and antidote to being exposed to new ideas with euphemisms and shibboleths you can't be expected to be prepared for.

You also can come up with your own rituals and ideas. For example, the Satanic Flame Ritual we have is not due to access to some secret knowledge but it helps externalize and objectivize an internal, subjective, emotional process. Things like candles and flames or altars are best seen in that light.

Anyway, hopefully that helps. It's not that you should never read something like The Satanic Bible or other esoteric works to get ideas. It is that Satanism is the exact opposite of place to look for good ideology or consistency, so you want to start somewhere else for that (we say anarchism) and then look to Satanism and other Satanists for aesthetics and inspiration for rituals that you can modify and integrate into your life in ways that best serve you.

#ask me anything #satanism #anarchosatanism #errico malatesta #Alexander Berkman #anarchist communism #anarchism

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lizardsfromspace · 5 months

Text

The thing about Project Blue Beam is that, when someone tells you "they're going to use holograms to pretend to be our gods while using technology to make earthquakes happen to make the people believe" you may go "huh, that sounds like that episode of The Next Generation where an alien con artist pretends to be Ardra, the Devil figure of Ventax II. What a weird coincidence"

But then you dig deeper and learn that the conspiracy theorist who came up with it...actually was ripping off "Devil's Due". Combined with the original 70s version of the story by Gene Roddenberry, which was published just before he dropped Project Blue Beam. The conspiracy theory persists to this day and none of them know it's plagiarizing a Star Trek episode (and unused movie script)

Anyway dishonor to everyone involved. Go straight to Gre'thor, say hi to Fek'lhr

#conspiracy theories #star trek #unreality cw

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mean-scarlet-deceiver · 4 months

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Daisy & Mavis?

Or maybe Sir Handel & Peter Sam?

Ooooh, Sir Handel and Peter Sam have a fascinating dynamic. However, I don't really have much to say that others haven't already said, and probably said better. To the degree that I'm tempted to talk about their Trauma Responses, I have another ask about Sir Handel & Skarloey, so I think I'll fold these thoughts into that post.

So, Daisy and Mavis — love 'em — only wish they got more screen time!

("Screen" time. Do they ever have a significant interaction in the television series? I really want to be told if they do.)

Actually they only have one page in RWS where they exchange a word. But it's such a good page. Posting it here for the uninitiated:

Look at this mess. Look at this absolutely perfect bitchfest. There are a total of zero brain cells in this conversation. Venting to your work bestie and and letting loose your inner mean girl. A classic RWS dynamic! It's just the diesel (& the female) version of the Thomas and Percy relationship: They make each other worse.

But, they need each other.

But, they make each other worse...!

Despite their lack of screentime following this, you cannot convince me that these two don't remain peas in a pod, just like 1 and 6 after 6 is transferred to the branch line.

I do think it's rather sad that Mavis is holed up in the quarry. :( There's a real bummer of a line when she appears in a later Christopher story...

"Besides, she sometimes finds it dull up at the Quarry with no one to talk to but trucks." I know it's realistic, but I want better for her. LET 👏 HER 👏 OUT 👏

Once smartphones became a thing, I like to imagine that they videocalled from the quarry to the carriage shed every night. (Annie, Clarabel, and Henrietta are very understanding about this when the call lasts half an hour. If ever the workers try to indulge Daisy and Mavis with a longer call, however, the coaches start murmuring...)

One great thing about this convo is that it's the first time I feel like I'm really, genuinely looking at lasting steam/diesel coexistence on Sodor's 'big railway.' Coz this is a target Awdry has been trying to hit for at least a dozen books now, yeah? Due mostly to his publishers' pressures, he's been trying to have beloved diesel characters while keeping his 1920-cosplay steam railway too, and this is where I think he finally hits the target. Daisy's first appearance was hamstrung because the turning point where she changes her haughty new-engine attitude and where the others accept her despite all the shit she's already pulled is off-screen, we're just told "they're friends now" and have to be all "right. sure." Probably because he got negative feedback on his Daisy hash, Awdry played it suuuuper safe with BoCo and Bear — less so Bear, but that's another post; for now I will just say that in contrast to Daisy they are presented as very clean-as-a-whistle, and their acceptance by the railway is made so much of that it doesn't feel natural, they both feel like one-offs. But then, ahhh. Now we've got Mavis, and Awdry has the bright idea to let her talk to Daisy, and BANG. Now we're here. This doesn't feel Informed, or starch-and-stiff, or tokenistic. You read this and you're like oh, yeah. Even the sleepiest branch line on this railway is now part dieselised. They're acting like characters! Everybody is acting like squabbling coworkers! It's like sinking at last into a warm relaxing soak. Ahhhhh. Here's the good stuff.

Because they don't need to be Representatives of dieselkind? They can just kinda suck for a moment, without being villains? When TVS subs out Daisy for Diesel, it automatically gives this conversation a sinister air. He's the devil on Mavis's shoulder. But in the original, there's nothing sinister here; it's homey. They're just venting to each other. Their behavior is kinda crappy, but also very normal and recognisable. New work besties fr. They are both three drinks in.

Daisy: He said what to you? Omg babe. I cannot believe that old garden shed said that to youuu.

Mavis: Right?????

Daisy: raising a glass Anything steam engines do, we diesels can do BETTER!

Mavis: hauling herself a bit unsteadily to her feet so that her gesticulation can be its most dramatic and sweeping You are RIGHT and you should SAY IT!

(Narrator: mildly ... Daisy was not right and, being probably the most specialised and least versatile engine then on her railway, she definitely should not have been saying it.)

(Above: The quintessential moment. Mavis & Daisy are commiserating/carping, and Annie & Clarabel are trying so hard to not hear their shit.)

Now, I've always had a question here...

Did Toby really say that only steam engines can shunt trucks?

The text indicates only that he was annoyed that she kept re-arranging things, they had a tiff, she rejected his input and left.

Then again, the text doesn't reveal that Percy calls Mavis's shunting "a ---- ------ ------ mess!", so, y'know. We get the minimum detail necessary in these stories. ;)

We never see Toby express any such sentiment about diesel engines. I'm inclined to think he never said this — and I suspect we're not supposed to believe he said this, only that Mavis is in stroppy teen mode and exaggerating and embellishing her grievances to the point where she's straight-up making shit up.

Still, I'm not sure. Usually in the RWS if a character is lying they are slyly or explicitly called out for it in the nearby text and this time the claim is just... sitting here.

Ultimately, I don't think he ever said that to her, but (considering how salty everyone on the Ffarquhar line can get: some have quicker fuses than others but they're all so provoke-able) I don't think Mavis just made this up completely. If she were making up stories from whole cloth, that would be... well, that would be 'Devious' Diesel behavior! I suspect, however, that Toby and Percy (comparing notes on her shunting) are at least thinking it, or have said it to each other, and Mavis has picked up on these vibes. All of which would be incredibly realistic.

Anyway, I bring this up because the answer does color my read of this conversation a little. If Mavis is completely making up attitudes that Toby never dreamed of having, and Daisy just eats it up and eggs her on, that makes this conversation somehow even 10x messier (and somehow I'm still rooting for their friendship). If this is a sentiment that is real or implied when Mavis or Daisy annoy the other Ffarquhar engines (and they can both be annoying, no question) then the bond between these two characters, with their very different personalities, just becomes even more 'understandable.'

Anyway, about those differences. Mainly, Daisy is ultimately very conventional. (This reminds me I have a nearly-finished essay about Daisy lying around somewhere. For now...) Mavis is the original, creative one, the mover-and-shaker. All Daisy's initial behaviors, as Hazel observed recently, are things we've seen from proud new engines before! She wants lots of attention, she boasts, she tries her damnedest to get out of work that she thinks is beneath her. What Mavis wants is to improve things, to have more responsibility, to get to stretch her wheels. Furthermore, Daisy by nature is keen to avoid work that's too heavy (she's a railcar with limited pulling power, so, you know, understandable); Mavis doesn't mind work — she just doesn't like being told how to do it, and she doesn't like being bored!

A point where they can be contrasted is in how they accept Toby's help and friendship at the end of their initial... "arcs." (All right, Daisy's "arc" is ended so clumsily that you can barely call it that, but you get me.) I'm not saying Mavis is devious or calculating, but for her Toby's offer of friendship is just as important as a pathway to her getting out of the quarry sometimes as it is for his forgiveness. It is her ticket out. For Daisy, Toby's offer of friendship was important because she wants friends, now she's making a friend yay!! — and I think that was pretty much it. Daisy just wants positive attention; that's what all her 'modern and right-up-to-date' stuff was about, but that failed to get her the positive attention she wanted and it turned out that being a team player did, so she had little trouble re-orienting herself. She resisted the pressure of everyone on the platform for her first train because she clung to the memory of her friend the fitter, but I don't think she's one to resist peer pressure in general, and as time passed and the Ffarquhar line residents became her peers, it was completely inevitable that she start to conform to their ways.

So (although, again, annoyingly — we aren't shown) I reckon that Daisy panicked after Percy's accident when she realized that she would be in trouble too (all right, someone probably had to point it out to her). And so for the first time she pitches in and does some hard work. Toby can't help but own "you did well to get all your half cleared, Daisy" and Daisy's entire system lights up because compliment, baby!!! That's all she ever wanted. She's Toby's man now (so to speak).

I can also easily imagine that, in trying to get adjusted to Mavis, Toby remembered how thing went last time. He must have tried from the first to tell himself, through slightly gritted teeth, "Just find something to compliment the new engine on, just anything. Helps build trust." But he was stymied twice over. 1) She keeps re-arranging the trucks in some crazy-ass unapproved way and he can't find ANYTHING nice to say! 2) It wouldn't have worked, anyway. Mavis wouldn't have been satisfied with just some friendly attention. Mavis wants to do. shit.

Mavis is bright — possibly has little common sense, but she's bright. I do wonder sometimes if her shunting arrangements are actually bad, or if they're just different and Toby and Percy can't adjust. (The text does own that due to the siding arrangements it's inefficient to put the trucks where Toby expects them. She probably does optimize things — from her point of view, anyhow.) Either way, though, here is an active and creative mind at work. Plus, her ploy to slo-o-owly expand her pathway down the line in "Toby's Tightrope" shows long-term planning, which is hardly something we've ever seen any vehicle do! So yeah, she's well above-average bright for an engine.

Hilariously, in Their Own Scene she is easily impressed by Daisy's lofty confidence (another classic RWS dynamic — it's giving Duncan staring amazed at James's boasting), but she's also super young, hasn't been Toby-fied yet, and in short I expect that as the years go by Mavis is likely to see Daisy as less of a role model and more of a crony/partner-in-crime. Daisy might instigate things sometimes — but she needs Mavis and Mavis's bright ideas before she really makes much headway! And I expect Mavis is often the instigator anyway. In her literary-device role of Second Coming of Thomas (Dieselised Flavour), she probably continues to want all sorts of things that engines aren't supposed to pine for (silly stick-in-the-muds!) Daisy is quite content to grumble but put up. Mavis will find a way to make stuff happen.

(Which is the only explanation we're going to get for how Mavis is at large on every quarry and some not-remotely-a-quarry sets on the island, come TVS!)

That was a light rap on the TVS there, but not a very hard knock; at least TVS insisted (in spite of all logic) on using her character for stuff. Christopher lets me down, personally, by finding so little for Mavis to do — and never having her and Daisy interact! I want more of this shit so badly.

However, in the Author's Note of Thomas Comes Home, Daisy apparently has a bee in her bonnet about fans who think the series has no female engines and is like 'me and Mavis tho!!!!!!' Which... I like seeing Daisy mention Mavis. That's all. It assures me that they’re still a duo (although I prefer Wilbert's interpretation that they bond over being The Two Diesels On This Line vs. Christopher's implication that their bond is being The Two Girls On This Line).

#i want them to have more adventures in making things 'better' (worse)#like the lucy and ethel of the ffarquhar maybe?#(i haven't actually seen i love lucy... this is just osmosis)#i would also be all right seeing them kiss #highly acceptable #just give me more daisy & mavis content. please.#d1+fqc #great ask!#thank you #chatter #ttte daisy #ttte mavis #ttte toby #wilbert awdry really said 'someone on the ffarquhar needs to civilize these headstrong young half-feral engines'#' ... and it ain't gonna be thomas lmfao'#i think he's WRONG to discount thomas and percy but i think it's very funny that his attitude is just 'they're toby's problem coz no one #else is qualified'#'thomas and percy are out there causing wrecks and playing dress up and being chaos gremlins themselves'#ttte analysis #ttte headcanon #also 'no one to talk to but the trucks' IS big 'i was desolate. all alone in the empty manor. me and a staff of eighteen servants.' energy #the SOLITUDE mwahaha #... but yeah i get it #get 👏 her 👏 out 👏

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thenotsoholyspirit · 4 months

Text

The devil's in the details

(Matt Murdock x reader)

(💕First of all, I'm sorry I have not had the time yet to publish the 4 chapter for my other fic, my first semester at Uni is surely taking a load, but I still wanted to give an old idea a chance and try to see where I could go with it. It's mostly an introductory chapter hope you like it !) 💕

Summary. Trying to makes end meet as a young woman has never been easy, even less living in the turbulent city that is New York. When (y/n) will have to make an impossible choice, she'll have to decide between the ones she cares the most. It's never safe to fall in love, especially with that mysterious lawyer at the bar she's been working at and the secret she guards underneath.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

“Another round for the tables two and one, and please don’t forget the missing beers for the group at table five”

It definitely was a busy night at Josie’s.

I had barely entered the bar when multiple orders were already piling up in the kitchen. Friday shifts were always the best to work they told me, and being new around here, I was kind of guilty to be glad Katy asked for a longer maternity leave.

“(Y/n)!”

I turn around, Josie looking at me impatiently.

“I didn't hire you to stand there and look pretty princess” She sighs but gives me a small smile, she could never stay mad at us for too long, “Now, please bring these three beers to the pool table”

I nod excusing myself as I go grab the drinks.

The atmosphere tonight was intoxicating. The talking, the music, even the bursts of laughter and the smell of alcohol that surrounded me were enough to get dizzy on my own. It was almost too overwhelming.

I take a deep breath, as I twitch my lips, trying my best not to bite them as I had promise myself to stop that bad habit.

Normally I had a better handle on my anxiety, but I’m not used to work during the busiest hours. Yet, I need money, and Friday nights are generous on tips. I couldn't let such an opportunity pass, and when Josie asked for our availabilities I was the first to raise her hand.

It’s for her.. all of this is for her

I’m so involved in my own thoughts I don’t notice the man passing in front of me. I suddenly lose my equilibrium, the plate of beers now jumping in the air, as I stumble falling on the floor. I barely have the time to register what’s happening when I feel a quick hand behind my back that stabilizes me again.

“Well… there go our beers”

I hear a voice from the back, a blond guy with slightly longer hair and another blond woman staring at me.

I look down at the floor, now with a puddle of beer and pieces of glass laying there.

Josie is going to kill me

“Are you ok ?”

I look up now to the man in front me. He had dark glasses and his short yet slightly ruffled hair only gave him a more attractive look. I notice the big stain of beer on his chest, which admittingly looked quite well built under the white shirt he was wearing.

C'mon you ain't here to flirt with clients

“Yes I'm sorry your shirt it’s”

I notice now the white stick on his left hand and the realization of his blindness hits me. I feel even worse now. “O.. o shit I’m sorry.. I’m awful I.”

“Don’t worry” he gives me a small smile “It was due to clean anyways. Although.. I heard some glass breaking.. Are you hurt in any way ?”

I shake my head until I realize he can’t exactly see it.

“No I’m ok just..” I sigh, why was I about to tell my problems to a stranger, “I haven’t quite been the best waitress tonight”

He smiles again, this time with a little bit of curiosity in his look.

God if smiles could kill

“Too much of an ambiance ?”

”Is it that obvious that this is my first busy shift ?”

He slightly laughs, until I see Josie appearing with a loud sigh.

“(y/n) could you try not to kill one of our regulars ?”

“Hey Josie the beers are on us all right add it to the Murdock Nelson tab, this stuff always happens”

Josie smiles at the man, it seemed that they’ve been acquaintances for quite some time. She easily accepts as she also gives a nod to the other blond guy.

“I’ll bring the mop”, I shyly tell her as I leave the scene. When I arrive at the kitchen, I hear Josie chuckling at me.

“So Matt caught your attention ?”

I do my best not to turn completely red.

“You know I ain't got time for that Josie”

I sigh. It was true. Too many bills to pay, too many things to do. Where would the time for a boyfriend ever be? Josie’s face becomes then more serious, she also knew all too well about my situation

“How's your mother been ?”

I try to smile, it was never easy to talk about that subject.

“Doctors say she may get a leave from the hospital next week, but you know, i'd rather not be too optimistic on that subject…. I still remember last time”

I take the mop as I sigh. I knew Josie wouldn't have hired me if she didn't know my situation. I was already working at some convenience store during the day, but I was still short of money for the rest of my bills. This without counting the community college classes I was taking half time.

And still not enough money.. it's never enough money

She gives me a warm smile, patting my back as if she wanted to say more but had no words.

“You’re a good girl (y/n), you’ll get through this”

I just nod. There was no time for feelings.

Before leaving the kitchen, I give a last look to the group where Matt and his two friends were happily chatting .

I shake my head, not wanting to be too distracted.

There was no time for stuff like this, I can only move forwards.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

At some corner of the bar, a man was sitting, stirring his cocktail as he gives an attentive look to the place. Nobody notices him when he goes out for a smoke as he makes a call on his phone.

“We found her boss… she’s still here… at some bar in Hell's kitchen”

“Perfect’" the voice on the other side of the line was professional, yet so cold and grave, “Tell Weasley to bring the guys... It's gonna be a long night”

#daredevil x reader #matt murdock x reader #netflix daredevil #daredevil #marvel x reader

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thiswaycomessomethingwicked · 3 months

Note

I LOVE YOUR WORKS SO MUCH ITS INSANE RAHHH… where does one find your ‘a wolf in chase’ fic??

aww thank you! that's so kind of you to say!

I took Wolf in Chase and Pale Before the Fall down because for a time there was an iteration of them (very, very different I will say) being shopped to publishers but that is now on the back burner.

Please find the Woodford Series PDFs below (I also included the few on AO3 so you have a sense of the proper order of things):

Pale Before the Fall

Pairing: Napoleon/Wellington; Historical pairings (e.g., Wellesley/Kitty, past Napoleon/Josephine etc.) Rating: T to M(ish) Summary: After Waterloo, through a cunning lawyer and some finagling, Bonaparte manages to end up in England instead of St Helena for his final exile. Of course things don't stay quiet. There's an old murder. A stodgy Duke newly returned from France. A disintegrating marriage. And a couple of ghosts to top it all off. (and full of pretentious chapter titles and what not) Published: 2013-09-27

A Wolf in Chase

Pairing: Napoleon/Wellington; Historical pairings Rating: T to M(ish) Summary: Sequel to "Pale Before the Fall" though I don't think it's too much a necessity to have read the first one. A continuation of something like a friendship. If one may be so liberal as to call it that. Mostly, there are mysteries and a bored (former) emperor who has nothing better to do than drag a certain duke along on his adventures. Published: 2015-07-07

An argument for the wise use of blankets, or, Napoleon dislikes Canova's interpretation of him as Peacemaker (AO3)

Pairing: Napoleon/Wellington; Historical pairings Rating: G Summary: For an anon on tumblr who requested the following: I have only one Napollington suggestion and it is anything including Napoleon being ridiculously angry about Arthur having that naked Napoleon statue in his house. Published: 2019

Unsent Letters**

Pairing: Napoleon/Wellington; Historical pairings Rating: T(ish) Summary A child has gone missing out in the countryside. Wellington investigates. Napoleon is pissed that he's not invited along for the ride. It is a series of letters between them as shit gets weird. Published: 2018? I think?

**Note: Takes place ostensibly in the same universe as Pale and Wolf except that I also borrowed heavily from the rewrite that was being shopped around. So some characters who died in the OG are alive in this version. Treat it as an au of an au. I'll note that this is probably my favourite of the lot. Key differences: Georgiana Preston is alive, it's someone from her past who was murdered. Napoleon ended up half-dead on a river bank due to a fairy king trying to slice him open. Mary did some weird fucked up magic to heal him. Is he now like...weirdly sewn into the land? Maybe. Don't worry about it.

Wrack and Ruin (on AO3)

Pairing: Napoleon/Wellington; Historical pairings Rating: T(ish) Summary A letter from Joseph Bonaparte relating to the oft' cited and mysterious Jersey Devil brings Napoleon and an always less-than-amused Wellesley to New Jersey. Published: 2017

Usual disclaimer that these are quite old and absolutely not up to snuff compared to my current writing (I cannot emphasize this enough). But if you're interested, feel free to dive in.

#napolington #napoleon bonaparte #arthur wellesley #duke of wellington #writing #pale before the fall #a wolf in chase #ask #reply #anon

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