I feel empty, I feel a hole in my chest while sadness and anguish are invading me. I don't have enough strength to get up, move, concentrate and eat.

"Before she even touched me, I realized what would happen. It was as if I'd known this for years, that I knew the secret to the reason I'd never approached anything remotely resembling sex: it would take me back to something I didn't want, a memory that had hovered for years, hidden, in my head."

Scott Heim, Mysterious Skin

Being simultaneously sex repulsed AND hypersexual in the same moment is painful. I feel gross and want to puke but also I just need to get off and I want someone to use me

I'd rather rot in hell for the eternity instead of lowering my head for a god that allowed all of this

What happened to respecting all SA victims? What happened to letting us be angry? What happened to letting us process our trauma in our own ways? Is your horny demon show more important than us? I tried to fucking kill myself because my first exposure to anything sexual was when I was under 7 and I got r*ped by an over 50 year old man. We have gone through so much shit but when we criticize your horny demon show we aren’t valid? We didn’t go through horrible trauma because we don’t like your show? Fuck you. We have gone through SO much. Let us be angry. Let us criticize representation of US. These are things that happen. WE ARE ALLOWED TO SHOW EMOTIONS OTHER THAN HAPPINESS. LET US HAVE BE MAD. SO MANY OF US FUCKING HATE OURSELVES. WE DESERVE TO BE TREATED LIKE FUCKING HUMANS. R*pists, m*lesters, and p*dophiles deserve to burn and experience the worst and most painful deaths yet here you are treating one like this hot sexy man (he’s really not btw…) . I don’t care that it’s fictional. Again, shit like that happens, you are sexualising HORRIBLE and extremely traumatic things because you like the evil one dimensional r*pist. I don’t care if you like Valentino, it’s fine to like horrible fictional villains! Yet so many of you sexualise him. We SA victims have the right to criticize representation of our trauma, especially when that trauma is written and animated by people with r*pe fetishes. This has been annoying me (wrong word, not annoyance but like. Kind of?) Since the poison scene came out, we can have opinions. We ARE people. And we can express our emotions in different ways.

to anyone feeling depersonalization, uh, i have a sentiment. even though it doesn't feel like it's yours, your body is gonna protect you.

“But he was just a child”

So was I

And I’m suffering and he’s not

having a complicated relationship with sex/sexual things after sa is so weird because like . it'll be 1 am and ill be switching through apps and ill be thirsting over a character and then ill open tumblr and i remember everything bad shes ever done to me

I learned that all seeing eyes don’t only belong to God

Anyone else have a breakdown about something that doesn’t have to do with CSA but then the breakdown morphs into a breakdown about what happened to you?