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call-me-strega · 6 months

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28 Failed Attempts and 1 Heist Later- Chapter 1

Ao3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/50958199/chapters/128740585

It was obvious, if you paid attention that is, that Hobie Brown's love language towards others was Acts of Service. It's how he showed he cared. Such as when he made his own interdimensional watch to help Gwen rescue Miles and let her crash in his dimension, or when he tried to give Miles advice on his electrical powers, or even when he looked after Mayday when Peter got busy or just needed a break. Really it wasn't difficult to see that when Hobie cared about someone he tried to do things that would help them or make them happy. That's why when he finally got the bottle to confess to his best spider-mate, Pavitr Prabhakar, he decided to do a meaningful gesture to confess his fancy.

Pavitr was a bloody amazing lad in his eyes: brilliant, full of beans, incredibly strong, a real ace Spider-Man, and a right-fit bloke as well. He never seemed to let life get him down too long, always looking for a positive and keeping good humor about him. He knew when to get serious and deeply cared for his friends. When Pav had learned he didn't always have steady meals back in his dimension not only did he give Hobie an open invitation to pop in for a meal whenever he fancied but insisted on teaching him some proper Indian dishes so he could feed himself. Who wouldn't fall for a boy like that?

This led him to where he was now, in his kitchen a month before his planned confession trying to figure out how to not muck up a simple dal recipe. Masoor daal, or red lentils, was a relatively simple recipe Pav made for him before, so he thought he'd give it a go. All he really had to do was wash the lentils, fry up his aromatics, add in the lentils with water and some seasonings (Pav had stressed to him just salt and pepper was in no way enough seasoning), and cook until they reached the desired soft daal texture. Easy right? What could possibly go wrong?

-15 minutes later-

BEEEP! BEEEP! BEEEP! BEE-

Hobie frantically pushed open a window, coughing and trying to get the smoke and smell out of his kitchen. How did I even manage to burn the aromatics three seconds after putting them in? I thought oil boiled not burned! A quick consultation with the internet and the old Punjabi couple living a few blocks down revealed he should adjust the heat level and peel his ginger before use, or substitute it with ginger paste, which he decided to forgo wanting the dish to be as close to Pavi's daal as possible well there was still time to try to perfect it.

-5 days later-

On his next attempt, Hobie forgets to add the aromatics altogether and while edible the dish is rather lacking

-1 week later-

On his 12th attempt, Hobie get runs out of spices and the daal comes out just a touch too bland. He sighs to himself and resolves to acquire more before his next attempt.

-the next day-

On his 13th attempt, Hobie is reequipped with spices. Unfortunately for him, he goes a little heavy-handed with the garam masala. Even the Cheema's ( the old Punjabi couple) find it a bit difficult to choke down.

-1 lifetime later-

It is Hobie's 21st attempt and he thinks he's really got it this time. That is until his spider-hearing picks up a kerfuffle that sounds like the beginnings of a brawl. He takes glance a at the stove, telling himself he'll only be gone jiffy before swinging out the window. By the time he gets back, the daal is pitifully mushy and unappetizing.

-1 eternity later-

It is Hobie's 29th and final practice attempt before he confesses to Pavitr in three days. He finds himself saying a little prayer to the food gods that this attempt is successful. He carefully prepped his ingredients, adjusted the heat, and figured out the spice ratio and the exact cook time. All that was left to do was pray he hadn't managed to fuck up in some new way this time. Upon the taste test, Hobie nearly cries tears of joy. It was nowhere near as good as Pav made it, the cumin tasted slightly burnt, there were small chunks of garlic in it, and it was just a tad too soft but it was edible and tasted like daal, admittedly subpar daal, but daal none the less.

Hobie reveled in his victory, giggling to himself while packing some up for the Cheema's to try, the sweet couple gave him some surprisingly harsh feedback and great advice on cooking in the last month. Just as he was about to leave he got a notification on his watch, a message from Pav reminding him that the gang would be having a meet-up today "where the British stole all our stuff". Suddenly, a light bulb went off in Hobie's head. A devilish grin spread across his face. Well, now there's an idea that's more my speed.

~~~

British Slang Glossary:

Bottle- courage or bravery

Fancy- used as a verb "to fancy", meaning to like or want something, usually expressing a crush or craving food

Bloody- used to emphasize a point

Full of Beans- full of energy

Fit bloke- attractive man

Ace- amazing

Muck up- make a mess of, fail miserably

Kerfuffle- a fuss or commotion

Jiffy- a short amount of time

#across the spiderverse #atsv #hobie brown #chaipunk #pavitr x hobie #cooking fails #cooking #romantic gestures #comedy #goldenpunk #pavitr prabhakar x hobie brown #long post

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call-me-strega · 6 months

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28 Failed Attempts and 1 Heist Later- Chapter 2

Chapter 1, Ao3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/50958199/chapters/128740585

Pavitr was swinging through Mumbattan full of even more glee than usual. Not only had his most bindaas friend, Hobie, invited him to hang out later today but he was killing it as Spider-Man today! There must be some new rouge or something in town because he's been following clues all over the city and finding different Indian artifacts all over the city. It's so cool to be able to see these things up close, he'll probably hand them over to Mumbattan's Society for the Preservation of Artifacts and Culture, SPAC for short.

With a grunt of exertion, Pavitr landed on top of Harashi's Gourmet Bakery. He glanced down at the sign boasting "Quality and Goodness in every Sweet", looking around for the artifact he was meant to find here. the clues said "Find a piece of something precious where everything is good, high quality, and delicious" so it obviously referenced one of the most well-known chain brands in the city. Looking at the sweet shop reminded him of his meet-up with Hobie in... he glanced down at his watch, an hour from now. He had plenty of time then. I wonder is I have enough time to stop and get some mithai or maybe some bakarkhani to bring with me?

He abandoned this train of thought when spotted something white contrasting with the blue letters against the brown and orange awning. He hops down to check it out wondering what it will be this time. So far he'd gotten a couple of carvings, statuettes, and tapestries, so it'd probably be something in that vei- ! Ye kya hai! Pav's eyes nearly bugged out of his head as he did a double take. Hai Ram, if his A+ in history wasn't just for show then this was one of the actual Amaravati Marbles!

Pavitr whipped his head around left and right, frantically looking for the next clue. He found the note made out of newspaper clippings taped to the 'k' in Bakery. He quickly yanked it off and read it over as fast as he could.

"If you liked the marble, you can find more where plenty of people young and old show off their own marbles."

Hmm.. Pavitr pondered the clue for a moment before it struck him: there was a section of the grounds in Bijlee Park that was popular among the citizens for playing kanche. That's where his next clue would be. After securing the Amaravati Marble in a web backpack he swung off to find the next one, his thoughts of Hobie falling wayside for the moment.

As Pav was securing his latest artifact to his now comically large web backpack he checked his watch. Shoot! There were only 20 minutes left before he had to go meet Hobie! Okay take a breath and calm down, he told himself. "You got this Spider-Man!" he whispered to himself. First, Pavitr decided to drop off his current gatherings at SPAC's headquarters, thankfully only five minutes away swinging. The President and Volunteers were overjoyed to take the priceless artifacts off his hands. His generous donation consisted of the tapestries, statuettes, and carvings he found originally, as well the new additions of several Amaravati Marbles, the Harihara Idol, and Shah Jahan's wine cup made of white nephrite jade.

After waving bye to the SPAC members Pav pulled out the last clue and read it over once more: "Well done my friend, finding so many of my "liberated" treasures. You'll find the last one with the queen whose magnificence is beyond measure. You know, she reminds me of you, beautiful and strong. If you find me I'll make you the raja to her rani so don't take too long."

Lifting a finger to his chin he mulled over the clue. The way it was written seemed to reference the physical properties of a landmark and the characteristics of the person it was modeled after. Obviously, the concept of liberation was also an important aspect of this clue. And he'd have to be a fool to ignore the blatant referencing of royalty. The more he thought of it the more one person and landmark seemed to fit the bill. The riddle was about the Rani of Jhansi; the biggest, strongest monument to her was the Statue of Liberty.

8 more minutes left. I can do this ... and if I can't, well, Hobie will understand. Pavitr readied his bangles and swung off once more.

Pavitr landed on top of the Statue of Liberty, in the space made between the folds of her turban. He looked around to assess the situation and found himself baffled. Not only were his spidey senses not detecting a danger but this whole set-up was peculiar. There was a picnic blanket with a basket on top of it to the side and what seemed to be an amp nearby. It was all backlit by a curtain of battery-operated fairy lights. It almost seemed like someone had set up a date. What... was whatever new rouge that arranged the scavenger hunt trying to ask him out?! That would have to be one awkward rejection if it was true.

Suddenly, he heard the light footfalls of boots behind him. He whipped around only to see a red and blue blur rush behind him. Then the weight of something metal pushed down on his head and his vision went dark. He heard a deep, familiar voice speak to him.

" You alright there Vitty, ya lookin' right gobsmacked, ya are!"

" Hobs! It's you!" Pavitr replied, pushing back the metal rim of the object on his head from his eyes.

" Ya got in one Pavi," he chuckled.

" Did you do all this?" the shorter asked, gesturing to the setup.

" Guilty as charged Ducky," he said with a shrug. Pavitr seemed to vibrate with excitement.

" That means you set up the scavenger hunt too! We were gonna meet today anyway, was it supposed to be a surprise or a game for me or something? Because if so then it was actually pretty fun! Although, you did make me worried that I had a new rouge for a minute there. So, what's with the picnic stuff and where's the last artifact?"

Hobie smirked and pointed at his head, " Might wanna check up there mate." Pavitr pulled the artifact of his head and nearly fainted.

" Hai Ram, Hobie! This is the Koh-i-Noor! It's one of the biggest cut diamonds in the world and a part of the freaking CROWN JEWELS! Hobie how did get this!!" Pavitr asked breathlessly. Dear God how would he explain this one to the people at SPAC- wait no, would he need to contact the government about this one?! He was interrupted mid-spiral when Hobie gave him a cheeky smile and said, " Well I did say I'd crown you king in my note, didn't I?"

Pavitr flushed and punched his arm, "Hobieee!"

Hobie just laughed and continued, " And as for the other stuff, well come here, I'll show you." He grabbed Pav's hand dragging him over to the blanket. He pulled them both to sit down and started pulling out food from the basket. Pav noticed it was all homemade, some of it looked like Maya Auntie's and some of it didn't. He looked back at Hobie who pulled the lid off a container of daal, setting it in his lap and handing him some naan.

" Here, try it. I made it myself." Pav pulled off his mask, taking that as his cue to dig in. Meanwhile, Hobie pulled off his own mask, took a deep breath stealing his nerves, turned to look his friend in the eyes, and spoke.

" So you asked about this whole setup and why I did this," he closed his eyes and inhaled once more. " I set this up as a date. I really like you Pavitr. I did this to show you how much I cared. The artifacts, the food, it's all part of this scheme I thought up to confess. I thought you might like it if I got back all that stuff the British stole or if I made the daal like how ya showed me.” Wrapped up in his nerves Hobie just looked down at his hands and continued. “I want ta hold ya hand, I wanna take you out, I wanna hold you close and serenade ya. I want ya to be my boyfriend, Vitr.” He looked up to give Pavitr a soft smile. The smile quickly faded giving way to panic when he saw Pavitr’s face. The boy had stuffed his face with the food Hobie made and was lifting a hand up to cover his mouth. His eyes had begun pooling with tears, and he seemed quite distressed. Hurriedly, Hobie began to backtrack.

" Not that ya have to reciprocate just cause I confessed! No pressure, as long as we can still be friends?" That seemed to distress Pavitr more as he began to chew frantically. " Or not?! Its fine! Or is it the daal? Is it that bad? Because I-"

Pavitr swallowed and threw his arms around Hobie's neck, cutting off his rant. He rested his chin on the taller boy's shoulder and squeezed him tight. He raised his head, lips brushing against pierced ear lobes, and whispered,

" It's perfect. The food and the confession. I would love to be your boyfriend, Aashiq."

Hobie felt his face flush as he returned the hug pulling Pavitr's muscular form against his chest. The two stayed wrapped in their embrace for a little while before Hobie finally pulled back. His hands drifted onto Pav's biceps and Pav rested his hand on his shoulder as the other came down to his chest. The pair stared into each other's eyes for a moment; then Hobie broke the silence.

" Did you really like the daal?"

Pavitr smiled back. " It was a bit mushy."

The two boys burst into giggles pulling each other close once again. Hobie rested his forehead against Pavitr’s, hands drifting down to his waist, and took a moment to calm down. He looked into Pavitr’s eyes once more and studied them. They were a deep chocolate brown color with streaks of caramel dancing through them. The glimmered in the light and he could almost see his own eyes reflecting back at him. This time it was Pavitr who broke the silence. He spoke in a hushed tone, as if afraid of what he was about to ask.

“ Can I kiss you?”

“ Please do.”

The shorter lent forward pressing their lips together. It was awkward and clunky and wonderful. He smiled into the kiss as they figured out the best way to fit together. He felt a warm feeling blooming in his chest as his partner kissed him back. After what seemed like forever but felt all too soon they separated. The two took a moment to just bask in each other’s embrace, overflowing with feelings of warmth and content.

“ So what was that you said about a serenade lover boy? It’d be a shame if this great date you set up went to waste.”

Hobie grinned reaching for his guitar, “ Oh you’re gonna love this!”

The two boys sat there on the top of the Statue of Liberty, enjoying their date and appreciating each other’s presence. Just to young souls ready to become something beautiful.

~~~

Glossary:

Bindaas- cool, chill, fun to be around

Mithai- sweets/confections

Ye kya hai- "What is this", can be used to express surprise

Hai Ram- "By Ram"/"Oh my god"/"by god"

Bijlee- electricity (lightning)

Kanche/Kancha- marbles, a popular game in India

Rani/Raja- queen/king

Aashiq- lover/love/in love

References:

Harashi's Bakery- referencing a combo of Hershey's and Karachi Bakery (a popular Indian bakery chain)

Bijlee Park- my play on Battery Park

Jhansi ki Rani (the Rani of Jhansi)- Queen Lakshmibai(Laxshmibai), an actual badass historical woman. She was a leader, rode horses, sword-fought, and led troops in rebellion against the British East India Company. Read more about her here. I used her as the model for the Statue of Liberty because I thought she fit the bill as Lady Liberty. I imagine her in battle garb with a sword instead of a torch.

#across the spiderverse #atsv #hobie brown #chaipunk #pavitr x hobie #cooking fails #cooking #romantic gestures #comedy #goldenpunk #pavitr prabhakar x hobie brown #stealing from the British Museum #scavenger hunts #getting together #long post

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