#captain dad and baby danger
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Sustenance for Sale! Sustenance for Sale!
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Little bit of context on nights the kids spend it at the Man Cave Ray will bring mattresses, sheets, blankets, and pillows to the main part of the Cave and set them up for the kids.
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When Bluey first aired in the US Henry had started watching kids cartoons to help him sleep at night when his nightmares would get bad. He found Bluey one night and found a way to watch it. He quickly got attached to the show. He didn't want to tell anyone else about it because he felt really embarrassed about it.
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On one of the days Henry spent the night at the Man Cave because it was too late for Ray to be comfortable letting any of the kids go home he woke up from a really bad nightmare. So he grabbed his headphones and cell phone and curled up on the mattress Ray brought out and watched Bluey for a while. He fell asleep when watching it and the next morning before any of the kids woke up Ray walked in to check on them and make sure they were covered up and saw Henry's phone screen playing something on it. When he walked over he saw it was Bluey and just smiled softly. He then adjusted the blanket, turned the phone off, and took out Henry's headphones before leaving.
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Henry still doesn't know Ray knows Bluey is one of his favorite shows.
#henry danger#henry hart#captain man#kid danger#ray manchester#henry hart is his kid#dad!ray#could be apart of the#captain dad and baby danger#au i made#bluey show#brought to you by my anxiety got super bad#and my casual watching of Bluey#turned into an every night watch#i can't sleep without it playing some nights#lol#someone help it's becoming a problem#i also cry a lot to it 😂😂😭
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the Sarek family is hilarious to me because you have so much drama in one place. there have got to be at least 3 like, holo-documentaries or whatever about them. how could you not?
you have Sarek, the patriarch: one of the UFP's top diplomats, who knocks up a Vulcan princess then goes “hrm I am ambassador to Earth therefore I should marry a human” and he does, upsetting all sorts of the worst kinds of people on his home planet and causing racist hate groups to try to blow him and his family up multiple times, and seems honestly more put out by his son joining Starfleet than his other son becoming Vulcan Moriarty
Amanda, the matriarch: an accomplished educator and quite possibly the only well-adjusted member of the family, but when her son Spock shows up on her doorstep after growing a beard, having a mental breakdown and apparently murdering several medical staff she still shrugs and hides him in the family mausoleum
Sybok: Amanda's stepson from the aforementioned princess fling, who becomes an antiestablishment criminal mastermind with an edgelord fake name, hooks up with a hot space pirate, finds religion, starts a cult, takes an entire colonial government hostage sparking a diplomatic incident involving three galactic superpowers, and hijacks a Starfleet ship to the galactic core to find the Vulcan Garden of Eden, where he dies fighting god in hand-to-hand combat
Michael, a traumatized human girl Sarek brings home from a work trip, who joins Starfleet, becomes their first-ever mutineer, goes to prison, saves the Federation from a war most people think is her fault and gets “killed” in a highly classified, very suspicious incident involving an experimental starship and a series of red lights that appeared across the galaxy like a divine omen (oh, and returns 900 years later to solve the dilithium crisis, kill the head of the Emerald Chain and save two entire star systems including her siblings' homeworld)
and last but not least Sarek & Amanda's one-of-a-kind hybrid baby. Spock, who gets accepted into the Vulcan Science Academy, tells them to go fuck themselves when they're racist about it, runs off to Starfleet instead, gets so famous his arranged marriage falls apart resulting in him publicly strangling his own captain to death except not really, steals the Federation flagship twice, invents time travel, saves the entire planet Earth, dies and comes back to life, goes into his dad's line of work and achieves peace with the freaking Klingons as his opening act, then after a long successful career suddenly dips to go do extremely dangerous underground activism on one of the most paranoid authoritarian worlds in the galaxy to unify the Romulans & Vulcans who've hated each other for over a thousand years — and he isn't around to see it but it eventually works. then he fucks off with the VSA's high-speed prototype ship full of the most dangerous substance known to science and gets sucked into a black hole of his own creation, never to be seen again. and this is just the stuff that's public knowledge!
then you dig into the novels where Sarek's ancestor basically makes out with Zefram Cochrane 5 seconds after meeting him and Amanda tells the press her husband has a huge cock
I love them
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✦Incorrect C.O.D Quotes, since AO3 is down✦
Gaz: I wanna know what exactly your type is.
Y/N: I'm not just gonna give you more fodder to throw at me-
Gaz: I have an idea of it already, but I want details!
Y/N: No!
Gaz: Like- König! Would you-
Y/N: Of fuckin’ course I wanna fuck König! He’s huge, he could LITERALLY snap me in half and my dad didn’t love me, of course I want him to fuck me!
Soap: *does that weird inhale-choke-cough*
—
(Dick mention + a woman’s experience of a dude making gross comments. It’s funny I swear-)
Fem!medic!Y/N: most of the time, people are pretty nice and sometimes impressed when when I bring up I’m a medical professional. Other times…eh..
Soap: Eh?
Y/N: Sometimes you get conspiracy theorists.
Soap: Ohhhh…
Y/N: Some evangelists, gross dudes.
Gaz: Gross dudes? What’s the worst you’ve heard?
Ghost, sipping a whiskey: This outta be good.
Y/N: Uh, once I told this man hitting on me I was a field doctor? He said, and I quote. “Been awhile since my last check up, mind checking me for ball cancer.” And I-
Gaz: WHAT
Soap: YOU’RE KIDDING
Y/N: I am not. I just- I walked away.
Price: Fuckin’ hell.
Y/N: It’s fine. He got shot in the dick next mission, ended up with a male doctor.
Ghost: Karma at its best.
-
Graves: Oh FUCK YOU
Y/N: Tsk, oooo…you don’t have enough money for that.
Soap: HAHA!
-
Soap, drunk: Back Street’s back, alright! Do do do do-
Gaz, drunk on Price’ shoulders: Dodooodo-
Price: Simon, get your boy.
Ghost: *picking Soap up by his belt, carrying him like a bag* Yes sir.
-
Recruit: When you gonna stop giving me blue balls?
Gaz: Whoa hey!-
Y/N: Aight, I got my steel toes on. How bout we make’em black and blue?
Recruit: I-
Y/N: Shut the fuck up. I’ve already turned you down, get a hint. Word of advice? Rather than shoot for the stars, maybe shoot your shot in your lower bracket, yeah?
Recruit:
Gaz: Someone get a fire extinguisher, this dudes been burned.
Soap: On it. *sprays recruit with fire extinguisher*
-
Soap: Nice onesie, does it come in men’s?
Gaz, in his pyjamas: I think you cum enough in men for the all of us.
Soap: ACK-
Ghost: *slides out of the room*
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Ghost: Have you ever considered, just once, using your brain first?
Soap: Now why would I do that?
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(Insert random name I HC for Laswell’s wife)
Kate, after being in a bad explosion and ending up in this hospital: My wife, she’ll get upset if she sees you rubbing me like that on my chest.
Diana: I am your wife.
Kate ….
Diana: :)
Heart rate monitor: BEEPBEEPBEEPBE-
Kate Hi.
Diana: Hehe, hi.
Gaz, in the corner: Oh to be in love.
Soap: This is disgusting, why can’t I have this? >:,(
Gaz: Cause your type in men is awful.
Soap: Hey!
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Y/N: *walks into common room* Hello, I am very upset. I feel a meltdown coming on and you are all buff men, so I would like to request being picked up and held like a baby for a short period of time, please.
Soap: Do you want to talk about what’s bothering you?
Y/N: Nope.
König: ….*slowly approaches and picks Y/N up from under their arms*
Y/N, clinging to him like a koala and hiding in his shoulder: Thank you, I appreciate you.
König: *awkward back pat*
-
König: :)
Y/N: Bloopbloopbloopbloop-
Horagi: Y/N!
Y/N: What?
Horagi: Tha-That is our colo-that is a dangerous man!
Y/N: He’s not a dangerous man!
Horagi: What are y-
Y/N: We’re bloopin’! Bloopbloopbloop-
König: -w-
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Price: Kid, I need you to-
Gaz & Y/N: *dancing like they don’t have jobs to do*
Gaz: Go stink!
Y/N: Fuck it up!
Gaz: Go stink!
Y/N: Fuck it up!
Gaz: Go stink!
Y/N: That’s what’s up!
Gaz: Go stink!
Y/N: I’m in love!
Price: AHEM
Gaz: Oh shit-
Y/N: HEEEYY captaaaaiinn, what’s uuupp ahaha…
Price: *sigh*
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(Based on; Me if COD was real. Deadass. Full serious. I am not kidding)
Gaz: So have you met the Captain yet?
Y/N: No.
Gaz: Are you nervous?
Y/N: No no, I have a firm belief that they’re just people. Obviously I’ll respect him as a superior but that’s nnnnnnnnwho the hell is that?
Y/N: *fucking breaking their neck*
Gaz: Oh- Nope. No no, THAT is Captain. Don’t think about it.
Y/N: I’m thinking about it.
Gaz: That’s not allowed.
Y/N: Ive done worse for less, if he asks I’m sucking it, you can’t stop me.
Gaz: Jesus Bloody Christ-
Y/N: Tell him to call me when he’s on leave.
Gaz: Stop-
-
König: *walks in*
Ghost: ??
Soap: Oh, hey!
Gaz: Y’a need somethi-
König: *picks up Y/N under his arm while humming, leaving the room*
König: I love stealing, I love taking things!~
Ghost: What the f-
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Colonel!König: I’m 42 so, I don’t-
Y/N: YOU’RE 42?!
Colonel!König: Yeah.
Y/N: …it’s okay no one has to know babygirl~
König: NEIN! Nein, don’t call me babygirl!-
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(Based on this awful Gaz outfit I saw on Twitter)
MILF!Y/N: *doing paperwork*
Gaz: Would you date me?
Y/N: Baby we couldn’t even get a drink together. You can’t buy me nothin.
Gaz: What do you mean? :(
Y/N: Look at your outfit! What are you wearing?
Gaz: I think I look pretty fly.
Y/N: For who, your mom?
Gaz: :((
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Gaz: STOP DATING MY CAPTAIN
Y/N: ….you know what, I’m gonna start dating him even harder.
Gaz: What’s that supposed to mean?
Y/N: You know what it means.
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MILF!Y/N: *shoving apple juice into a cart* They gon’ need nutrition.
Laswell: How many kids do you have?
MILF!Y/N: Eleven!
Laswell: So I’m assuming your kids really like apple juice?
MILF!Y/N: No but they looove orange juice but they’ve been bad this week.
Laswell: What grade are your kids in?
MILF!Y/N: Sixteenth grade.
Laswell: PFFT Sixteenth- that’s not even a grade! So your kids graduated college?
MILF!Y/N: No they, they- …where are my kids?
-
(Her “kids” on the other side of the store)
Price: Boys please-
Gaz: I AM NOT LOSING!
Soap, in a fuckin’ headlock with him: Yes you fuckin’ are!!
Ghost: *slipping cookies under his mask, he did not pay for them*
König: *looking for a fruity snack*
Horagi: *grabbing as many packs of spicy chips as he can*
Alejandro: This is a disgrace. *holding up frozen burritos*
Rudy: These are worse. *motions to frozen tamales*
Alex: Did you know you can use coke as rust remover?
Farah: …and you want to drink it??
-
Y/N: So. Kyle.
Gaz, already afraid: …yes?
Y/N: I found some of your old playlists…
Gaz:
Y/N:
Gaz:
Y/N: You an emo?
Gaz: I was a SCENE as a teenager, get it right.
#call of duty mwii#call of duty x reader#john soap mactavish#captain john price#kyle gaz garrick#simon ghost riley#cod konig#horangi call of duty#alex keller#farah karim#alejandro vargas#rodolfo rudy parra#kate laswell#call of duty incorrect quotes#modern warfare
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I’m thinking about dragon hybrid Price as a dad to little dragon hybrid you.
This is more headcanon style than my usual and a little bit all over the place but I had to get it out because yes >:3
CW: none
Word Count: 1020
Price had always lived a solitary life. Dragon hybrids were relatively rare, and he didn’t exactly go out of his way to find a partner.
Purely by happenstance, he came across another. And almost out of obligation as well as it being mating season, they started a relationship. She quickly fell pregnant, but despite it all, it wasn’t meant to last.
Due to the more solitary nature of dragons, your mother left after you were born. Price didn’t blame her, the two hadn’t been incredibly close after all, only having gotten together during the mating season but not having an amazing connection beyond that. He was grateful she at least communicated her plan in advance so that he could prepare.
But when you were born, oh my. You were everything.
He took you home from the hospital alone, yet before he’d even gotten out of his car and into the house, he knew that a bond had formed that he could never sever.
Dragons were vain and prideful by nature. And for Price? His pride and vanity all poured into you. You were his. His creation, his child. He’d do anything for you, to keep you safe. And if necessary? He would protect you with the world as a shield.
The baby years are tough. Growing horns, wings and fangs is not pleasant. It can hurt and because of it, there are a lot of nights where you’re inconsolable, just crying in his arms as he tries to soothe you.
His wings folding around you seem to work best, creating a sort of cavern-like bubble where his warmth and heartbeat are the main sensations.
But even with that, the growing pains are sometimes too much and the poor captain had to lose sanity in favour of consoling you, rubbing ointment on your horns and massaging your tail and wings the best he could.
Yet the first time he sees your little tail wag when he walks into the baby room to feed you after waking you, all the sleepless nights are worth it.
You were starting to develop into a true dragon.
You stand in your box, holding onto the railing and bouncing excitedly on your feet. Your little horns poking through your unruly mop of hair while your wings are folded on your back.
“Hello, little lizard.” Price smiles, walking over to you. Immediately, you stick up your arms and he takes the hint, grabbing you under your armpits and lifting you up.
Holding you in his arms, he can feel you wiggle, trying to wag your tail - but you can’t.
Because now that your wings have finally started developing in earnest, he has needed to put preventative measures.
Where before your wings were papery and flexible, your tail stumpy and short, now both were getting some volume, the bones in them growing and lengthening - solidifying. And because of it, sleeping becomes dangerous.
In the past, many dragonlings have broken wings or tails by rolling around in their sleep, getting the limbs stuck under themselves and twisting too far.
Because of it, the wing-tail guard was invented. Used to pin said appendages against your body and cushioning them - allowing you to roll to your heart’s content while sleeping.
And now here you sat on his arm, the soft, black coloured cushioning moulded perfectly to fit your wings strapped to your back, your tail stuck between your legs, unable to wiggle or wag it.
“Come on, darling.” Price grinned, setting you down on the changing table and untying the straps, freeing your wings and tail back up.
And when your wings shift and move a little after he takes it off, oh how his heart jumps in excitement.
He’s been so eager, waiting for the day you finally open your wings for the first time.
For most dragonlings it happens around 1,5-2 years old. So you were right around that age.
He tries to encourage you by showing off his own wings. Anytime he has you on his lap, he spreads them wide, and you never fail to be completely mesmerised by it.
Seeing it, he tries to let you know you have your own, to encourage you to use them. He runs his hand down the muscles and bones of your wings, petting them down, getting you used to it by massaging the flesh and muscles, loosening them up.
It takes a lot of coaxing and weeks since you first tried, but finally, you manage to open up your wings and spread them.
And Price couldn’t be more proud.
Your wings are a carbon copy of his, except just a slight shade darker. And he knows that with a lot of training and upkeep, you’ll be just as strong a flier as he is.
Speaking of. Now that you’ve opened your wings for the first time? He can finally take you on your first flight.
Strapped to his chest with a harness, he gently stretches your wings out. It looks a little awkward, to have you dangling from his chest with your wings pancaked between your back and his front, but it’s important to get you used to flying, to using your wings.
The glee and pure joy that radiates off of you when you’re soaring in the clouds is unprecedented. You’re not scared, nervous or hesitant as he feared you might be, no. Instead, you’re kicking your feet, and screeching in delight. You keep tilting your head back to look at your dad and Price grins down at you, uncaring that your horns are stabbing into his sternum as his powerful wings flap, carrying the both of you through the sky.
The 141 know everything about you. Price can’t help himself. As stated before, dragons are proud creatures, and you are his pride.
He cannot help but share with the other most important people in his life.
And oh how they adore you too.
All in all, you are Price’s greatest treasure, and he can’t wait to see you grow up into your own, powerful dragon.
-
I would love to write more for this. If you want something elaborated or have your own idea and wanna see it written, please drop it in my ask box to give me an excuse to do so! ^^
#this is one of three dad Price fics I’m writing now#john price x reader#captain john price#captain john price x reader#dragon price#john price#price x reader#cod x reader
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lover to lover.
⋅☆⋅ mrsaluado's first xmas event ⋅☆⋅ masterlist
pairing: james x fem!reader.
summary: it's your first gift exchange as a couple and you are both dangerously lovesick.
content warnings: JUST FLUFF. I SWEAR.
word count: 1,4k
you felt silly, you felt like your gift was silly and felt even sillier for worrying so much about it your palms were sweaty even though it was very late at night and the house was surrounded by the whiteness of snow. this was your first christmas as james' girlfriend and even though you had been to his home before, that was the first time you would be staying the night as well.
to top that kind of pressure, it was the first year your gift to james would actually matter, you couldn't just give him a sweater, or a book or a coupon for free of charge homework help, it had to be good, it had to be meaningful.
and it was hard to do that for someone who had everything. he was the golden boy, not only were his parents generational wealth loaded, they were caring, loving and were always making sure he and his friends had everything they could ever need. how could anything you try to give him compare to that?
nonetheless, you tried your best, and now the party was over, the other three marauders black out drunk in sirius' room from spiked eggnogg mr. fleamont pretended not to see them drink and you on james' bed waiting for him to come back after helping them out.
his smile brightened up the whole room, even though the lights were on and the warmth in his eyes made you forget about any worries that surrounded your mind while he was gone. you stretched your arms to pull him in a hug after he closed the door, though he ignored completely, simply laying on top of you with all of his weight, forcing you to lay down as well. "honeyyyy, i'm so tired." he whined, his cheek touching yours as he spoke.
one of your hands went to his arm, while the other played with his hair, he was such a baby when he wanted to, but you were lovesick, dangerously lovesick, so it was endearing to you. "no gifts today, then?" that made him get up in a jump, excitement filling him with the energy he had lost to sleepiness.
"nooooo, not what i meant." he pouted, batting his beautiful eyelashes at you, you laughed, knowing that would be the reaction, he had been extremely curious by your present from the time you showed up engulfed in green flames inside his family's fireplace, a big heavy something, perfectly wrapped, to jamie written in your handwriting in a heart shaped note that he knew he would keep safe inside his wallet to the rest of his days.
you got the gift from his nightstand and handed it to him, the anxiety coming back again as you started overexplaining yourself to him, "wanted to make something special, but you have so much stuff i... didn't know what... so i asked your mum to help me with this. i know it's like, nothing super unique but... i don't know." you fumbled completely over your words and he looked so deep into your eyes you knew he was able to read your whole entire soul without even trying at all.
"even a rock you find on a road and decides it reminds you of me would be special." everything you do, everything you touch is special, is what he actually wants to say, but he refrains from it, carefully taking out the tape holding the wrapping paper together, refusing to rip it apart. his eyes sparkled when he saw the leather cover, his name golden along with his gryffindor quidditch number.
he opens it, not sure what would be inside, the first page had your handwriting again, written in red and filled with doodle hearts: my quidditch lover boy, know that wherever you play, i will always be your biggest cheerleader.
the rest was pictures, from the first one his mum took of him with a broom when he was still barely a person, his little arms holding tight to his dad. the first time he flew alone to show them. the letter he sent when he made the gryffindor team, his first captain's armband, tickets from matches he went with his father. the last picture was from his last victory, you both kissing with the biggest smiles while sirius covered you both with red paint.
it was a good thing he never pretended to be one of those emotionless guys, because his nose was red, his eyes watering as you heard him sniffing. "this... honey, this is the most beautiful thing." his fingers passed over the picture, with such care it seemed he was afraid to ruin it, he pulled you into a hug and then lifted your chin to face him, his lips touching yours like you were a treasure he needed to protect. you felt the saltiness of his tears and you couldn't help but laugh, it was just too adorable.
james let go of you, but not before kissing your whole face. he found a spot on his desk for your present, where it would be the first thing anyone spotted when looking around his room, and then took a small box and a piece of parchment from the first drawer of his nightstand. "m'feeling a tad inadequate now, mine isn't as thoughtful but... ms. euphemia did help me with it too." you laughed at the way he talked of his mum, "i wanted to give you some sort of jewelry, but everything i chose was simply grim, james darling." he gestured air quotes while trying to get his mother's tone across.
he handed you the velvet box, parchment still in hand as he waited for you to open, you were still stunned by the information he wanted to give you jewelry, you felt like your heart and your stomach were dancing and twirling around inside of you as how official that sounded. opening the box you find a beautiful, seemingly antique, silver ring, it had a red gem on top in the form of a triangle. you were completely speechless as you touched it lightly.
"m'dad proposed with that ring." your eyes widened at that, positive you were gonna pass out at any moment. "it's very old, and it's been in our family for generations, if you look closely you can see a symbol, the triangle one is for my invisibility cloak."
"james, this is beautiful, but... i can't accept this, it's a family heirloom i... it belongs to your family." you couldn't even look at him, you were out of breath, out of words, out of ways to react.
"yeah, that's sorta it. you're part of my family now." he takes the ring out of the box and slides it on your right index finger, so not to pressure you, so you knew it was a present, a promise of commitment, but not an obligation or a way to imprison you to him. "and my mum kept this for years, i had no idea, she says it's adorable, so..." james hands you the parchment finally, and you open it to see the date on top, stating it was a letter from two years before.
a letter he sent to his mum, from hogwarts, talking about you.
he went on and on talking about sometimes he felt like his heart was gonna jump out of his chest when you were around and that wasn't normal, that didn't happen before. and how he could smell your perfume before even seeing you had got into the room.
he was fifteen and down bad for his best friend and was so confused he asked his mum for advice. it was indeed the most adorable thing. and euphemia was so sure something would come out of it she kept the letter. you had to put it down on his bed so you wouldn't wet it with your tears. "you're such a sap oh my god." you said in a mocking tone even though you were the one crying like an absolute baby.
"enjoy it now, next year you're getting a simply grim necklace and a honeydukes discount coupon." james replied matter-of-factly, but his grin and his eyes showed how glad he was that you had enjoyed the gifts that much, "i love you too much, you're gonna wake up one day and m'gonna have inflated and exploded by how much." you couldn't even reply to that with anything other than a loud laugh, your hands quickly going over your mouth when you remembered how late it was.
you felt his weight over you again, but this time before he could be completely over you using you as a mattress, he slides beside you, pulling you closer to him, and closing his eyes. "merry christmas, lover boy." is the last thing you say before falling asleep in his embrace.
#lari writes xmas#lari writes sometimes#marauders x reader#james x reader#james x you#james x y/n#james potter x reader#james potter x you#james potter x y/n#james potter imagine#james potter scenario
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because i woke up today still thinking of zosan's baby girl, here are some stuff about it that are now my roman empire:
none. i repeat NONE OF THESE STRAW HATS know how to hold a baby. sanji figured it out due to dormant maternal instincts alone. and more than half the time he has to yell at everyone to not hold her up by the calf or the ankles ("i'm looking at you luffy please for the love of the all blue do NOT gum gum whip her around like a toy—")
unlike both her dads, ayari is actually being extremely picky with food in the beginning. she hates certain textures and cries like its the end of the world when her baby food isn't heated to the right temperature. funnily enough, one of the few times she ate something she didn't want is if chopper is next to her eating the same thing and telling her its yummy. dw none of the baby food goes to waste. they're all re-used somehow in the week's menu. or zoro just ends up eating it.
ussop made a lil wrap around cloth for ayari so that sanji could cook while carrying her hands free. or zoro could have her strapped onto his back and nap while he does pushups.
robin could be seen reading books to ayari when both zoro and sanji are out cold and exhausted from being first time parents. one or both of them would wake up to find robin telling little ayari histories of the islands they visit, or the countries they've saved. she tones down some of the darker elements until she's old enough to grasp it. ayari grows up with auntie robin's love of wanting to know the world.
nami started doing her makeup with ayari on her lap. she shows all the different little products to her, letting her touch her brushes and everything. nami even "does ayari's makeup" too aka she just tickles her face with the brushes and pretends to put makeup on her so she feels like she's doing it too. when she's a little older, ayari asks sanji to join them and more often than not, sanji is making lunch with a full face of makeup done by ayari.
ayari's teething toy is a little plastic mouth sword. zoro is infinitely happy about it.
in the beginning, sanji tried to take up most of the parental responsibilities up until the point that he got too sick to even stand. he was stressed and exhausted beyond belief, actually pushing zoro away a lot. but when he collapses one day sporting a fever that was highly too reminiscent of when nami was sick after little garden, it scares him enough to finally seek zoro out for help.
and its not like zoro has not Tried to take the load off. its just that sanji was still fighting all his repressed feelings for zoro and this undue pressure hes put on himself to become a better parent than judge ever was to him. that he could raise this child with love and attention and devotion, completely forgetting that hes not the only parent.
zoro and sanji have a heartfelt talk about how the wish that was granted on that island was a blessing beyond belief. that theres a reason ayari looks like both of them. that she takes after both of them.
they both wished for this child in the deepest depths of their hearts. they wanted not just to be together but to have someone that grows up loved by them. cared for by them. not a restart or a replacement for a lost loved one like they first thought it was. but a child who sees them — zoro and sanji — and will one day wish to have a love like theirs.
oh also "luffy" is ayari's first word because zoro and sanji say it so often to stop their captain from doing dangerous shit while he's holding her. in line with that, her second word is "stop" so the first sentence she ever says is "luffy stop!"
the crew are hysterical over it. sanji stares into the void bc he wished for ayari's first word to be "dada"
he settles with the little joy of her fourth word being "marimo"
because her third word was "curly" (something he nearly strangled zoro for)
#niki's fics: she has your eyes#zosan#one piece#sanji#roronoa zoro#oc: roronoa ayari#ussop#nami#nico robin#monkey d luffy
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NCT FIC REC : JEONG JAEHYUN
back to the nct fic rec
just us. (fav, smut, fluff, royal!au)
promise of duke (fav, smut, nobless!au)
oops, baby (i love you) (fav, smut, fluff, angstish, modern royal!au)
a summer love (fav, fluff, suggestive, 60's!au, smalltowngirl!au)
seeds of pomegranate (fav, angst, smut, fluff, greek mythology!au)
just us. (smut, fluff, royal!au)
team captain (smut, fluff, college!au)
sleep well? (smut, incubus!au)
of sunrise and roses (fluff, suggestive, demigod!au, mythology!au)
on the shore of the styx (angst, mythology!au)
son of zeus (fluff, demigod!au, mythology!au)
son of lachesis (fluff, angstish, demigod!au, mythology!au)
son of dionysus (angst, demigod!au, mythology!au)
the charming (smut, housemate!au, college!au)
not so charming (fluff, hogwarts!au)
romanée-conti (smut, fluff, sugardaddy!au)
the v week spy (smut, fluff, college!au, stvalentine!au)
king of the streets (smut, fluff, angst, streetracer!au, journalist!au)
begin again (smut, angst)
die in your arms (smut, angst, spooky!au)
just friends (fluff, college!au)
i've got my eye on you (fluff, deaf!jaehyun)
rose bud (smut, fluff, angstish, college!au)
pregnant partner (fluff, smut)
je ne sais quoi (fluff, suggestive)
two worlds appart part.2 (angst, smut, royal!au)
midday reverie (smut, angst, fluff, abo!au)
twilight (smut, vampire!au)
boy toy (smut)
body party (smut, boxer!au)
milf (smut, fluff, milf!au)
no distraction (smut)
one of the girls (smut, neighbor!au)
sleep well, princess (fluff, smut, brotherbff!au)
horizon (smut, office!au, ceo!au)
chained (smut, arranged marriage!au)
Fucking up the sheets (smut)
back for more (smut)
our little secret (smut, ceo!au)
shapeshifter wolf (fluff, angst, witch!au, shapeshifter!au)
teacher's pet (smut, teacher!au)
deadly kiss (smut, office!au)
head over broomsticks (fluff, suggestive, hogwarts!au)
jaehyun's new secretary (smut, office!au, ceo!au)
stress no more (smut, ceo!au)
make a mess for me (smut)
racer (smut, angst, streetracer!au)
trick or treat (smut, halloween!au, dad!jaehyun, neighbour!reader, ceo!au)
trick or treat (smut, halloween!au, neighbour!au, voyeur!au)
a nonsense christmas (smut, camgirl!au)
christmas puppy (smut, fluff)
cockwarming (smut)
runway (angst, fluff, smutish, e2l!au, fashion!au)
stars, moons & other celestial bodies (angstish, fluff, retro!au)
you have one missed call (smut)
wrong hands (smut, bodyguard!au, mafia!au)
tits obsessed (smut)
19:30 (smut)
heart aches (smut)
honeymoon avenue (smut, angstish)
around the corner (fluff, angst, rich!au)
deadly kiss (smut, fluff, office!au, architect!au, engineer!au)
boyfriend material (fluff, fake dating!au, angstish, college!au)
7:37 (fluff, college!au)
baby making (smut, new parents!au)
hearts won at practice (fluff, smut, junior footballplayer!au)
pastas? (fluff)
that's it (smut)
popsicle (smut)
perv! jaehyun (smut)
perfume (smut, werewolf!au, witch!au)
danger x johnny (smut, abo!au)
can you handle it? x johnny, jeno, jaemin (smut)
i wanna make you scream (smut, ghostface!au)
send in the clowns x mark x haechan (smut, halloween!au)
#nct#jaehyun#smut#fluff#nct 127#nct fic#nct fic rec#jaehyun fluff#jaehyun smut#jaehyun angst#jaehyun one shot#jaehyun scenarios#jaehyun imagine#jaehyun x reader#jaehyun fic#jaehyun fanfic#nct 127 smut#nct smut
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CD & BD Update
So my brain had some ideas for Captain Dad and Baby Danger. So I'm going to rewrite the first two chapters, finish the third one and figure out how to continue the story from them to the ending I planned for the first book.
No promises on when these things will be out, but I'm hoping the rewrites will be out soon.
Super excited about getting ideas because I love this story so much!
#henry hart#ray manchester#ray manchester is henry's dad#henry hart is his kid#captain dad#baby danger#Captain Dad and Baby Danger#henry danger#dangerverse
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I love your baby!loscar au man
I need more of baby Logan with George and Alex, my 3 fav boys (other than Lance)
Thank you so much!!!🥰
I love writing about the 3 of them, it's always so fun for me. Lance has been growing on me so I need to go and watch videos and interviews of him so I can write about him in my AUs. 😂 The Secret Santa video where he got Fernando the captain hat made him rise exponentially in my rankings.
I wasn't sure what to write since I had so many head canons and fanfic ideas so I made a compilations of little scenes and moments! If you want any of them expanded or elaborated one, feel free to ask!!!
Logan is approximately 7 months old here.
Shots
"Does he really need the shot?" George held Logan tightly against his chest.
It was just him and Logan today since Alex was meeting with Williams. Logan seemed so happy and unaware in his arms and it pained George to know what was going to happen next. There was a reason Alex usually took Logan alone.
"Yes, I'm afraid so." The doctor smiled.
George paused for a moment. You can do this George. You put yourself in danger all the time for F1. You have it in you. You can do this.
"Okay."
The doctor smiled and wiped Logan's upper arm with an alcohol wipe before taking out the syringe.
"It'll be just a little poke."
George felt his hands get clammy as Logan remained blissfully unaware of what was going to happen to him. To the doctor, it must've been only a minute or so. To George, it felt like time was moving so insanely slow. He felt the way Logan stiffened in his arms and could see the way Logan's face scrunched up, wailing from the pain.
"There, all done." The doctor smiled and looked up. "Sir, are you crying?"
*******
Umbrella
Logan clung tightly to Alex's blue jacket. His little body was wrapped in a thick blanket and George walked next to them, carrying an umbrella over their heads.
"Are you warm Logie Bear?" Alex cooed.
Logan giggled before turning to George and trying to grab the umbrella. His attempts, however, were unsuccessful as his arms were a bit too short and his parents were actively working against him.
"Ah!" Logan turned to Alex and yelled.
"Aw, I know. You want the umbrella." Alex laughed. "You're too little though and we're both a bit too tall."
"Ah!" Logan turned to George in hopes that he would be a bit for sympathetic to his plight.
George only laughed though before kissing Logan on the head. "Maybe when you're a bit older, you can hold your own umbrella."
******
Accident
Logan didn't like the atmosphere in the garage today. Logan had fallen asleep when the race started and woke up two hours later to find everyone rushing around. He could see his dad's car was back in the garage but Alex wasn't anywhere to be seen. His dad always comes and picks him up the moment he comes back. if Logan is asleep, he brings Logan to the debrief or to the driver's room.
"It's okay. I know you're scared. Let's go wait in my office." James gave a thin smile and carried the baby carrier into his office. Setting it on a chair, James readjusted the blanket that was slipping off. "It's a bit cold here."
"UH! UH!" Logan was starting to get fussy. He wanted his dad. He wanted to go back to the hotel and play.
"I know. Your dad is just a bit delayed." James smiled before returning back to his phone, hastily shooting off texts.
Logan wanted to cry and wail because he wanted his dad. It had been so long since he saw his dad. Did his dad forget him here?
The door swung open revealing a frantic Mercedes driver with a bag slung over his shoulder. "I'm so sorry. I came here as fast as I could."
"It's okay, I didn't expect Alex to have to be flown to the hospital."
George breathed a sigh of relief before turning to Logan and smiling. "Hey, Logie. How are you doing?"
"Uhhhh!" Logan kicked his feet and held out his arms, tired of being in the carrier.
George quickly undid the buckle and picked Logan up, hugging him tightly. "We'll go visit Dad right now, okay? He'll be so happy to see you."
"George, it'll be okay. Alex is strong, you know that."
"I know." Logan didn't know what was going on, but he didn't like it. Even his other dad hugged him tighter.
*****
No Dangerous Driving
People say having a kid changes you. When they were adopting Logan, everyone on the Mercedes teams told him that he would change, even the smallest habit that he didn't realize he had would change. To George, that was obvious. You have to make changes for your child.
George hated being driven, he had to be the one driving. Even if Alex was a good driver, George simply was not made to be a passenger princess. Alex can complain and yell all he wants, but George simply gets there quicker.
However, when Logan came into the picture, the seating arrangements also changed. Logan was sat in the back, in his rear-facing car seat. Alex also moved to the back to be next to Logan and it was George, up front, all alone.
George saw it as a natural progression. Alex described it as overnight. George, who always drove quite fast and aggressively, had magically become the ideal driver on the road. Speed limits were observed, road signs were obeyed, and George was surprisingly forgiving to cars who merged without signaling. George had to be careful. He was driving his family around, it was his job to protect them no matter what.
*****
Albon Pets
"Have you seen Horsey?" Alex asked George. The cat usually stuck to his side but he hasn't seen him in 2 hours.
George looked up from his phone pausing to think for a moment, "No? In fact, I haven't seen any of them in the past 2 hours."
Alex looked concerned. The house was usually not this quiet. In fact, it was a miracle, Logan had been asleep for two hours without either of them having to go and console him.
"I'm going to go see where they are." Alex stood up and poked his head in the kitchen and dining room. Nothing.
"They aren't in the backyard or in the living room," George said, scanning around for any signs.
"Upstairs then?" Alex walked up the stairs and poked his head into the bedrooms and bathroom. "Nope, nothing here."
There was only one room left, Alex and George's room. Logan should be sleeping soundly in there but now Alex and George were concerned. Logan's interactions with animals were always supervised.
George gently opened the door, careful to avoid any loud noises that would wake Logan up.
"Woof." The low woof spooked both go them. Otto looked a bit grumpy about being woken up from his nap.
The rest of the cats were strewn all over the bed and next to the crib, comfortably napping. Alex quickly stepped over the cats on the floor to check on Logan, his anxiety rising by the second before dropping at the sight of Logan peacefully sleeping. Horsey, never the biggest fan of the new addition, was comfortably napping on Logan's stomach.
*****
Uncle Charles
"Charles, are you sure you can do this? We can always leave him with Carlos and Lando."
"Of course I can. Do you think Carlos and Lando are better than me?" There it was. The competitive streak that earned Charles his place at Ferrari.
"If you're sure, then it'll be alright." Alex handed Logan and the baby bag over.
"Bye, Logie Bear. I'll see you in two hours. Be good for Uncle Charles." Alex smiled before running off to his meeting.
Charles waved before turning his attention back to Logan. It's only been recently that Logan has become accustomed to being without his parents or the Williams staff. "Let's get you out of that hideous blue and into something Ferrari Red."
1 hour later
Toto received a text attached with a video of Logan all decked out in Ferrari merch.
"I'm taking your star driver and your youngest fan❤️"
- Fred
****
Thank you so much for the ask!!!
If you want more of the little snippets or just want the full story of the snippet, feel free to ask!!! 🥰
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Breaking my heart this morning thinking about Ed's earliest few years in piracy.
We can assume he probably fell in with piracy soon after he killed his dad at around 14ish. My personal headcanon, given his reputation as a genius, one of the best that's ever done it, is that he probably became a captain pretty quickly.
Just imagine little baby Ed, trying to make friends with the other cabin boys only to have to watch them die horribly like Felix did, knowing that could be him for any little mistake. Never being able to feel safe, never really able to have friends as life beat him and those other boys down, never able to depend on the adults around who'd be all too willing to take advantage and abuse him.
I think about his mom, who he loved so much that watching his dad hit her that night was his last straw. Imagine little baby Ed curled up wherever he can find to sleep, his arms wrapped tight around himself because he misses her hugs so much. Seeing a dress they lift in a raid and wishing he'd be able to bring something so nice back to her. Closing his eyes, touching his fingers to his face, imagining she's kissing his cheek. I think about him gaining leadership roles quickly, with all the danger included there, and wishing desperately he could ask his mom for advice.
Just...this little kid, longing for a comfort and a softness and a safety he's never really gotten to know except from this one person who he's left behind. And he's going to have to go without that comfort for decades.
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Hey there, can I please request fluff or domestic headcanons for Captain Price, thank you in advance:)
Price headcanons
first time with hcs so ntm on me
While he’s away
he’ll try to give you daily updates during missions so yk he’s not dead (teehee) but yk bad service in Urzikstan or just international in general, it has you a little worried when he doesn’t text back for a while
Sending each other pictures throughout the day when he’s at the base and texts you when some trainee or anybody annoys him.
has a photo of you but keeps it very safe away from other people so no enemies know about you and you’re never in danger
if he was to get hurt, he’ll try and get someone to tell you asap
he always promises he’ll come back unharmed (as possible) and will buy you small gift as sorries for leaving especially if the mission took longer then expected
he hates it if he missed something important. like if y’all had kids and they lost their baby teeth or took their first steps he would be so pissed for missing it.
you’ve ever seen those bf who leave a bunch of letter for when they go away? yeah price would do that
When he’s home
he has to sleep with you so impossibly close to him, he needs to feel the weight of you so he knows you’re there and safe.
idk shit about the special forces but let’s just say he has like ptsd (cause he be killin’ people) and he has like nightmares or insomnia and you’ll be his safe place when he needs to be reminded that he did what he did for a reason.
and speakin’ of insomnia i could see him staying in the living room to not bother you as you sleep but you quickly notice he’s not there and go to look for him.
now happier stuff, he’ll spend every moment he has with you while he’s home just doing random mundane things, like grocery shopping with you or walking the dog with you. whatever it is he wants to do it with you
early morning cuddles when he’s home especially the first day back like he wouldn’t let you out of bed cause like what else do you need to do? 🙄
his job always coming first causes some arguments but it’s mostly you’re worry about if he will come back (he always does)
he wants to be a dad, wants a have a little mini him that he can teach self defense stuff to but the idea of getting “injured” dying makes him hesitant
and if he has a daughter, he’ll be like one of those dads that end up in dresses having a tea party with her and her stuffed animals.
speaking of stuffed animal, imagine him buying you little new ones when he comes home because they reminded him of you
attached to you as soon as he gets home
would try to quit smoking for you and his health
he keeps his work life and personal life separate doesn’t want to talk about what he’s done on missions and even tho he wants to he doesn’t talk about you at work
I think I saw a video like this but I can’t stop think about Price cooking shirtless and you just standing back and watching his back muscles move.
It was so hard not to make this smutty
Never dones these before, scared rn
#cod x you#price x reader#captain john price x reader#headcanon#first time#price headcanons#john price x reader#john price#captain john price x female reader#captain john price x you#captain johnathan price#captain price#captain price x reader#captain john price
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take 2
nico hischier x actress!f!reader
fc: sophie turner
warnings: swearing
liked by treaclychild, landonorris and 840,971 others
ynofficial: i heart nj
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claudiasulewski: first
maya_henry: mother is mothering
user1: WHO IS COWBOY
ynofficial: you mean you haven't heard 'cowboy like me'?
user2: what of nico?????
user3: DID HE SLIDE INTO UR DMS
taylorswift: i heart u
liked by ynofficial
user4: POV you came from deuxmoi's blind item 👀
user5: oui
ayoedebiri: ur pretty
jackhughes: yo
user6: no
user7: this is the wrong nj player commenting, i forbit it
user8: jack baby snap out of it
user9: only y/n could get the captain to wink at her and the social media heartthrob to comment on her ig
user10: ✨✨✨ BEST BELIEVE I'M STILL BEJEWELED ✨✨✨
liked by ynoffocial
liked by user11 and 78,186 others
deuxmoi: there were a few blind items submitted relating to the same A lister and athlete, and others also hinted at said sports star's respected status in the city, and his private nature, thus the lack of photos from the night
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user11: LOVING HIM WAS REDDDDD
user12: no bc i ship it so hard
user13: there's absolutely zero way that they're not talking about y/n and nico 😭
user14: in y/n's recent post she was wearing a sparkly star dress too
user15: me bc nico won't be protected from all the y/n girlies anymore: 😢😢
user16: THEY MOVE FAST IF THIS IS TRUE
user17: okay but my thinking is that they knew each other prior to the hockey game???
user18: RIGHT???
user19: THERE WAS SOMETHING ABOUT THE WAY HE KNEW WHERE SHE WAS SITTING THERE'S NO WAY A HOCKEY PLAYER CAN PINPOINT SOMEONE'S SEAT THAT QUICK UNLESS THEY ALREADY KNEW WHERE THEY WERE SITTING
nicohischier posted to their story...
liked by 138,017 others
hockeygossip: LATE ARRIVAL FOR Y/N L/N TO NASHVILLE HOCKEY AWARDS 2023. PICTURED WITH DEVILS HOCKEY CAPTAIN NICO HISCHIER MOMENTS AFTER HER LATE ARRIVAL.
comments for this post are turned off
liked by nicohischier, joejonas and 1,004,013 others
ynofficial: because the first launch failed ☺️
📸: nicohischier ❤️
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user21: IT'S HAPPENING IT'S HAPPENING EVERYBODY STAY CALM
user22: [tyres screech] [distant crash] [sirens] [crying] [heartbeat monitor]
user23: AHHHAH AHHAA HAHA *faints*
user24: he's taking a photo of her 😭
user25: the way she's looking at him and his concentration 😭
user26: your honour they're in love
user27: YOU MEAN TO TELL ME THE GAME THING WAS THE INITIAL HARD LAUNCH BUT WE ALL MISINTERPRETED IT???
ynofficial: ...yes
user28: WE'RE DUMB WE APOLOGISE
jackhughes: this is cute
nicohischier: can i get your number?
ynofficial: sure, it's #13
nicohischier: 😲😲
user29: you know it's SERIOUS bc she's never been ig official before
user30: fr she didn't even post callum mf turner, if i was her i'd have been yelling from the rooftops
user31: SHE SAID ALL THAT ABOUT HIM IN AN INTERVIEW OH MY GOD I'M DYING
user33: 'he's patient, kind, intelligent, calm, and just a really beautiful soul' I BELIEVED IN YOU NICO ALL THIS TIME
user34: nico fans are really winning here
user35: SHE MADE IT FOR THE END OF THE AWARDS
user36: but that pap photo from instagram? the way they were looking at each other has me in my own puddle of tears in a nest of already used tissues bc they're adorable
user37: that photo single-handedly instilled in me the belief that love does exist
user38: they're my 'don't take risks on dangerous roads' couple now
liked by ynofficial, jesperbratt and 519,195 others
nicohischier: it's come to my attention that there's been a lot of talk about my relationship lately, and i just wanted to come on here and confirm that i am batshit crazy for this woman, and pathetically in love with her. so, yes, the rumours are true 😊
ps i have the dad seal of approval
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jackhughes: first
john.marino97: whipped
nicohischier: yep 💪
jackhughes: why are you ignoring me
nicohischier: because you haven't said anything worth commenting on
ynofficial: i'm a sports watcher for you
nicohischier: appreciate it, thanks
ynofficial: you're welcome
user39: i think i love this awkward conversing
user40: it's my aspiration in life to have that
lhughes_06: happy for you, cap 😁
jackhughes: *cough* suck up *cough*
tmeier96: ABOUT DAMN TIME 👏👏
ynofficial: you can rip that NDA up now
tmeier96: i might frame it for sentimental purposes
ynofficial: really?
nicohischier: that's suspicious
siegenthaler34: in my defence i did try my best with the jumbotron incident
nicohischier: and we're very thankful for that
ynofficial: if anything it helped thicken the plot 😂
siegenthaler34: it was pretty funny
user41: THE y/n l/n being the captain's wag wasn't on my bingo card for this year
nicohischier: you and me both
ynofficial: please, i was a goner from the very SECOND you smiled
nicohischier: the very second? 😏
ynofficial: stfu and bring the coffee
nicohischier: as you wish
+ BONUS: Spittin Chiclets Podcast
#nico hischier x reader#nico hischier oneshot#nico hischier imagine#nico hischier social media au#nhl fic#nhl imagine#hockey fic#hockey imagine
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DOUBTS
Miles Morales x Reader
I lost most of my stories that I have written on my laptop because of my baby cousin used it TuT, enjoy spiders ❤️🖤
(Short fic)
As you stand along with the other spiders, hearing your father Miguel O'Hara explaining to your beloved Miles about the canon events that must and will happen to any spider people. You only bring Miles here to meet your father because Miguel gives you a green light to finally introduce Miles to him... but that's not why he wants him here.
Suddenly everything escalate so fast now that Miles is determined to go home to save his dad who soon will be the captain... you reach your hand to him, to comfort him. Miles turn to you with a heartbroken feature on his face without a doubt in his mind about is 'Why she bring me here', 'She's lying to me', 'She wants to trap me like her father is planning'..but no, you don't know this will happen at all.
You bang your hands at the red cage surrounding Miles after your father throw it at him screaming at your father to "Let him go!" and "He doesn't do anything he is not the cause of this!" but your cries only heard by no one. Your father tries to be reasonable with you saying this is for the best for him, to accept his fate.
A burst of energy blows few people who stand there to be thrown back, causing the cage that held Miles to malfunction. He broke it, Miles look at you and you make eye contact with him. His eyes show fear... confusion. Your eyes seem by him is sympathy... and regret, to ever bring him here... to put him in danger.
But there is unknown connection to the both of you... both of you know what goes through each other's mind.
"If I betray him... I betray myself"
Your eyes at Miles.
"If I betray them... I betray my country"
you look back to your father and friends that you made in the spider society.
"My country is very dear to me-"
"Dearer than I?"
Your head snap back to Miles, shaking your head gently.
"No... no not dearer than you"
you snap him out of his thoughts urging him to
"Run Miles!"
#miles morales x reader#miles morales x y/n#spiderman across the spiderverse#miles morales fanfiction
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That One Time Captain Marvel Was Asked Out [ and Freddy pretended to be his son to get out of that situation]
[ I Think of Freddy as a Protective Big Brother, so this was the result XD]
The JL/JSA welcomed its new members with dining in a restaurant
A Female hero asks Captain Marvel out but Captain Marvel is oblivious to her flirting, he just thinks she's being nice.
Freddy who is looking at the scene outside the restaurant window is pissed, his 'Big Brother Mode' intensified
“Billy doesn't know that lady has other intentions”
“But I can't just go in there-Wait..I have an idea” He thought to himself before turning into Captain Marvel Jr.
Junior put on a childish persona, and he walked into the restaurant, approaching Captain Marvel and the female hero“Hi Dad!”
Captain Marvel spits out his drink, he composes himself “H-hi Junior, whatcha doing here?”
Female hero:”Junior!? Is he your son?”
Captain Marvel: “ I-”
“Yup, and he promised to take me to the Amusement park today, right Dad?” Junior gave a look telling Billy to play along.
“Oh I’m sorry I almost forgot about that, We’ll go there right now! Sorry miss, I have to take my leave”
The female hero made a sad look presumably for flirting with a married man, “ Oh, that’s alright captain, have a nice family bonding time!”. Captain and Jr flew off the building “Yahoo!”
-later-
“What made you do that Freddy?”
“She’s dangerous Billy,I had to get you out of there!”
“But we were just talking” he raised his eyebrows in confusion
It was a reminder for Freddy that his baby brother still hasn’t gotten the concept of romance..
“Billy, just trust me when I say that she’s dangerous”
“Oh okay”
#dc comics#shazam#scenario#scenarios#fawcett comics#justice league#big brother freddy freeman#he has his big brother senses tingling#captain marvel#captain marvel jr#billy batson#freddy freeman
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Propaganda why Batman is insufferable:
Always has to be right. Does the most janked up stuff and doesn't care who it hurts. Imposes his will on others to the point of willing to bodily harm them if they do not comply (and yes, this does include his children)
I’ll also support Batman as a candidate because of the slapping Robin meme, which is annoying, and because he is just way too much. Too much all the time.
Has to always be right, regardless of situation. Because somehow the billionaire has knowledge of how middle class people think.
Propaganda why Tony Stark is insufferable:
She’s a hypocrite who is ready to restrict the freedom of others when they make one mistake, but when he makes a mistake he figures he’s able to handle himself
Super long, sorry lol
Thinking about how in Homecoming when Peter accidentally caused that boat to get split in half because the Vulture’s gun exploded and Tony was acting like as if Peter was completely in the wrong for going there just because he did it without his permission. He was acting like as if Peter was out of line and “disobeyed him”, trying to act like his father. And then I remember how in CACW he’s the one who scouted Peter in the first place just because he saw he might be useful against a personal squabble between him and Captain America despite knowing that he was a kid and he’s just now acknowledging how dangerous it is because Peter “acted on his own”
Completely hijacking Peter’s superhero story and trying to control his every move (Training wheels protocol and baby monitor thing he put in the suit), acting like Peter should’ve known that Tony would send someone in despite the fact that he’d been ignoring him for 2 months since Civil War and not keeping him updated on anything!!
How the hell is peter supposed to know Tony is going to listen to him when he treats him like a kid instead of a superhero when it’s convenient for him? And when Tony loses his temper after Peter says he’s 15 not 14 like “the adult is talking” bitch he could literally flatten you without your suit!!!
I guess in a way he is acting like a father but like the absentee kind. He’s more like a sperm donor father trying to act like he has any rights over Peter’s life smh.
It’s not that reprimanding Peter for the situation is bad, but the way he makes it seem as if Peter is irredeemable as if Tony wasn't a literal weapons dealer lmfao. He could’ve said what was the truth about it without completely invalidating him saying shit like “no thanks to you” after Peter asked if everyone is okay when it’s literally thanks to Peter finding a lead on those guys in the first place that they were even noticed and it’s not like the FBI being there could’ve in no way caused a similar situation.
And then near the end of the movie when he’s getting crushed by the building rubble screaming and crying for someone to help him where the fuck is Tony?? That scene just proved that he never needed Tony’s suit in the first place to be Spider-Man since he had to use 100% his own strength to lift it off of him. I know he would’ve found the motivation even if Tony hadn’t been involved in the first place to give him the suit, take it away from him and have the words “if you’re nothing without the suit you shouldn’t have it“ echo in his head. Why did Tony even take the suit away? Like as if he expects Peter to stop being spoderman without it??? Holy fuck. This is why you don’t make it out of endgame /j /srs.
When Tony took this suit away from Peter he was like “God I sound like my dad“ shouldn’t that be a red flag to him? Wasn’t he literally just saying that he wished his dad was better than he was?? Lmfao
Tony is so annoying. When they first meet he straight up bullies Peter into fighting for his personal bullshit, insults and objectifies Aunt May in front of him, spits into his trashcan and is in general being pushy af. He blackmails Peter when he doesn’t wanna come to Germany with him AND HE DOESNT EVEN EXPLAIN WHY HE WANTS HIM TO COME. Uncomfortable vibes lol.
Tony being the one to tell peter “if Captain America wanted to hurt you he would’ve” when Peter was trying to state his case, yet HE’S also the one who put Peter in harms way when he didn’t even want to go with him???
Telling Peter that he should stick to being a “friendly neighborhood Spider-Man” (stealing his thing once again) when that’s what Peter _was_ doing before Tony took him out of his zone and filled his head with grander things to be apart of….bitch? Die. Ohh waaaait (jkjk) but yeah
There’s the usual “he’s a war criminal who only felt bad about it when he realized his weapons were killing white Americans as well as Arab people” reason, and also he’s just super annoying. You had to be there for the original Avengers shitty dialogue a la “we have a Hulk” that had Tumblr in a vicious chokehold. Also he was supposed to FINALLY go away after destroying all his suits in Iron Man 3 but he just… didn’t! Which is bullshit.
Portrayed as a hero because? He chose to no longer mass produce war weapons and bombs after suffering the consequences. Huge hypocrite. Doesn't care about anyone but himself. Will backstab people if they believe in human rights when it's inconvenient to him. Seen as a hero while he's the personification of privileged people saying they're not privileged
>Makes weapons
>Billionaire
>Made multiple AI Surveillance Robots
>Gaslight a child into fighting a super soldier in a foreign country for him
>His fans are annoying
#batman#dc#tony stark#mcu#insufferable protagonist poll#insufferable protagonist tournament#tournament poll
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ShuggyUta family is so cute and funny bc like.
One one hand - AAAA CUTE Uta one day having the EPIPHANY that half of her hair is WHITE, and HAIR DYE EXISTS so she hunts down the closest blue to Buggy's hair. She dyes it in the middle of the night, and either comes out next morning completely casual OR bursts out like "DAD, PAPA, LOOK NOW I HAVE BOTH OF YOU WITH ME :DD"
They both implode immediately ((and Buggy gives her the "The sentiment is so sweet baby, but remember you never ever have to change your appearance to be worthy of love. If you want to, want it for yourself, okay? We love you no matter what" talk))
Then there's also the shenanigans.
Buggy: .... whatchya got there?
Shanks and Uta, both holding one of Luffy's hands, holding cups in the other: ........ smoothies?
<><><><><>
Buggy: Shanks so help me, I TOLD YOU not to get another kid-
Shanks: whaaaaaat? Hahaha, no Bugaboo. You told me very specifically I am not to adopt another child :))
Buggy: so why are there two new children in the kitchen
Luffy: I adopted them!
Uta: we have big brothers now!
Shanks:
Buggy:
Shanks: you told me not to adopt anyone. You didn't tell Lu or Uta.
Buggy: alright. That one's on me.
<><><><><>
Rayleigh, surprise visiting his kids: hello my children, I have swam across the Grandline- is that a kid?
Buggy, Uta on one hip, Sabo on his shoulders, Luffy on his back and Ace clinging to his leg and glaring death at Ray: four, actually.
Ray:
Buggy:
Ray: I'm a grandpa? And you didn't TELL ME??
<><><><><>
Shanks: happy mothers day, Bug!
Buggy: i'm... not a woman?
Shanks: maybe not but you ARE a botto-
Buggy: punches him I'm keeping the roses and chocolates
<><><><><>
Buggy and Shanks teaching them the pirates code, weapons, Haki, sailing, navigation, etc.
Shanks has a moment of "is it really okay to have them on the ship? We were in danger, Bug, it hurt us, what if we're hurting THEM-??"
Buggy smacks him. "We're learning from our dads' mistakes, Red. It's not perfect. We're not perfect. We just need to be the best we can and always put them first. We need to communicate. If we leave them, we can't protect them. If we leave, they'll be on their own. This is the lesser evil. We need to have their security as our priority. We're pirates, but we're parents, too. We can not commit to one over the other, but we can't let it hurt our babies. They're ours now. We are NOT leaving them behind."
<><><><><>
Ace gets a crash course in his history. It's rocky at first, but it's only bc he asks Buggy and Shanks ((separately, mind you)) about "if Gold Roger Had A Kid".
Buggy responds with a snort. "I mean, he kinda had two? But if we had another, then word, I guess? I'd be a little annoyed."
"Bc of his blood?"
"What? No. I'd be pissed that Captain didn't tell me. Asshole move, that. Why do you ask, freckles?"
Shanks, meanwhile, just shrugs. "Ya know how they say blood is thicker than water?"
"... yeah?"
"Yeah, it's bullshit. I wouldn't really care. If Captain had a kid, that's just not my business. I bled with him, for him, and he did for me. I think of him as my father, so I guess that would be sort of like... a little sibling, maybe? But it'd be up to the kid. Your blood doesn't define you, Ace. That's a lesson all good pirates know."
"......... mm."
<><><><><>
Sabo, no warning, in the middle of dinner: I'm a runaway noble.
Shanks: oh neat.
Buggy: oh? Which family? Want me to rob them for you?
Sabo: you aren't mad???
Uta, shrugging: it doesn't matter. You're still a feral jungle brat. Besides, if anyone in the family passes as a fancy pants noble, it's me!
Buggy: 🤨
Uta: ... and mama Bug. I guess.
Luffy: I don't care. Sabo is Sabo.
Ace: yeah, what he said.
Buggy: I will still rob them though.
<><><><><>
That's all I got rn baaaaiiii
Help these are all great 😭 You made my day with this <3
They just keep adopting kids and expanding the family. When they grow up, they get their partners and Zoro, Yamato, Koala, and Perona are there 24/7 because these kids cannot have a normal relationship that isn't based on codependency and both Shanks and Buggy have to deal with four more people around.
Ace telling them he is Roger's child and Sabo telling them he is a noble??? That kills me. They'd be so supportive and protective of them, too. It kills me.
Also, Buggy would ADORE these kids. Rayleigh comes over and sees the whole thing and Shanks thinks he's going to be angry because they didn't tell him but the man is just amazed they managed to have a family of their own without fucking up. Buggy keeps saying it was thanks to him because Shanks wouldn't have been able to do it on his own and, like, everybody agrees.
#also bold of you to assume buggy isn't a woman. buggy is whatever buggy wants. buggy is a feeling. buggy is an experience#buggy is non-binary to me okay-#but this is all great PLEASE i've been laughing for ten minutes#one piece#red haired shanks#buggy the clown#shuggy#uta one piece#asl brothers#monkey d. luffy#revolutionary sabo#portgas d. ace
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