#but like guys... come on! he's riGHT THERE!!! and it's SO TRAGIC!!! we love tragedy here right? look at kenjiiiiiiiiiii | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

that-was-anticlimactic · 1 year

Text

can we just talk about how kenji has one of the Most tragic abilities in bungou stray dogs??? like. the more i think about it, the more heartbreaking it is.

he's fourteen years old and has an ability people would die/kill for. in s3, chuuya called kenji the ada's "trump card", so it's safe to assume the rest of the port mafia thinks the same way. he is immune to literal bullets, to being whacked in the head by hard metal or pretty much anything, he can easily lift cars above his head as if they were nothing,,,

but only if he's hungry.

if you ignore that last bit, kenji has one of the best powers in the show. and like he still does, but my God. he's fourteen years old. he doesn't think his ability is all that impressive. he doesn't see the issues.

since he has a job, he probably doesn't Really eat lunch, and if he does, it's snacks. but also his job is a part of the armed detective agency. therefore, things happen all the time. who knows how long cases will run, who knows when someone will try to destroy yokohama or the agency or whatever. there's been many times when it's been clear that they've had to work into the night. then we have to ask: does kenji eat dinner? no. probably not. and if he does, he probably just eats a piece of fruit or something small. that way, he doesn't lose his ability. he is the agency's trump card, after all. and he knows how important his power is. i mean, that's one of the reasons he joined ranpo and the others when they went against fukuzawa's orders in s3. it's not explicitly stated, but i'd argue that it's implied. anyways. does kenji eat breakfast? well, i don't think so. why? he sleeps when he eats. why sleep so soon after he just woke up? he has to go to work, anyways. so he can't fall asleep.

so, we've basically established that kenji probably has an extremely unhealthy eating schedule due to his ability. but also,,, what about his sleeping schedule? what kind of relationship does he have with sleep? so, let's say he eats a full meal three times a day: breakfast, lunch, and dinner. let's say how long he sleeps depends on how much he ate... so let's say that a small snack is no sleep since it's barely anything, just maybe makes him a little physically weaker. and a normal meal is at least an hour. that's at least three hours of sporadic sleep during the day - one of them shortly after he wakes up. but you know what makes that even sadder? what if kenji doesn't sleep at night because of his ability. or, sleep consistently or well? we can assume the agency actually really wants kenji to eat, even if he falls asleep, so on days when he can't get away with not really eating, he sleeps during the day for an unspecified amount of time. his sleep schedule would get so thrown off. also, he was raised on a farm, so we can assume he wakes up really early anyways. maybe early enough to say that there isn't any reason to sleep because he would wake up soon normally anyways.

and... what if kenji can't sleep without eating? what if kenji has to eat to sleep? maybe it wasn't that way when he was younger, but the older he got, the more his body grew to rely on his ability's exception. like... that's just... really sad. this kid is fourteen.

and think about it. the agency is best friends because they are. they'd probably like to go out to lunch or dinner together. i bet half the time at least, kenji wouldn't eat. why? because he'd fall asleep. wouldn't want to ruin the fun. because then they'd have to watch their volume around him or try to wake him up (and i hc that it's really hard to wake him up for like... the first ten minutes after a meal at least - it gets easier the longer he's been asleep or the less he eats). and what if they can't wake him up? then someone would have to carry him back and that's so kind of them but, well, they didn't have to and now kenji feels like a liability or a burden. like he ruined all the fun.

and he works with the armed detective agency. they've got a lot of enemies. he is the trump card. the physically strongest on the team. also the most naive and, objectively, the kindest. oh and one of the two youngest. can you imagine how vulnerable he is when he sleeps? i would imagine the agency wouldn't want him to eat by himself in public for, you know, safety reasons. and that even includes the cafe downstairs. who knows what could happen if kenji fell asleep on his own? and that's probably why he went to eat with atsushi in s1 ep11: he was with atsushi so he could eat out. one of those rare chances. and if an enemy did get to him while he was asleep, he'd be pretty easy to keep out of it: just keep forcing him to eat. shove food in his mouth, force him to swallow. and there you are: you have the armed detective agency's trump card. and kenji knows this.

and the sad thing is? kenji probably doesn't even realize he's having problems. he probably thinks this is normal. something he just has to deal with - and i don't say that in a negative or self-loathing kind of way. a genuine "it's always been like this; i know nothing else" kind of way. he wants to help people: that's why he came to the agency. he couldn't handle not being able to help everyone back home. he needs to be useful, to help. he grew up on a farm: he values hard work a lot - that much is obvious. he feels like he can't help if he eats consistently. he's probably (albeit subconsciously, unknowingly) scared of what would happen if he did eat and sleep consistently. that means he's not useful, right? that means someone will get hurt because of him. he'd rather starve than someone else get hurt. he was given this ability, he has to use it to help people.

tldr: kenji's ability is so interesting and underutilized in the the manga/anime and in the fandom and is so overlooked in angst potential. his ability most likely has ruined his eating and sleeping schedule to the point where he doesn't know anything different and genuinely thinks it's healthy because it's what he's always done, it's what he was blessed with, right? kenji deserves more love in canon and by the fandom <3

#hi i had a breakdown over kenji but what's new #bsd #kenji miyazawa #bsd kenji #no but like am i wrong??? kenji has one of the most tragic abilities in bsd!!! like!!!#not only because he probably definitely has an eating disorder but also because it ruins his ability to sleep like #i just.#ahhhhhhhhhhhhh #he is SO overlooked CONSTANTLY and it makes me SO upset. like. gosh he is such an interesting character and this angst isn't like...#blatant because he genuinely has no idea anything is wrong!!! he thinks it's normal! and it prolly takes the agency awhile to realize oh #frick kenji is Not okay this is Not healthy because kenji genuinely thinks it is because it's all he's ever known #and yes i am writing a fic about this and yes it is like 5k words right now and yes it is still going #i have feelings!!!#if no one will care about kenji then i will!!!#that is a threat!!!#but like guys... come on! he's riGHT THERE!!! and it's SO TRAGIC!!! we love tragedy here right? look at kenjiiiiiiiiiii #sorry feelings have i #it actually gets more and more sad the more i think about it #he is. he is FOURTEEN.#anyways imma go work on the fic tehe???

70 notes · View notes

gay-dorito-dust · 11 months

Note

Would you be willing to write a Miguel x Spider!Reader oneshot where they’re arguing over something the reader did on a mission. And in the heat of an argument, Miguel yells “Because I love you!” at the perfectly wrong time, revealing why he cares about the reader’s safety.

‘What the hell was that back there. You could’ve jeopardised the whole mission with that reckless stunt you pulled back there!’ Miguel barked, ripping off mask the first moment moment he could; Hellfire were setting ablaze to his beautiful scarlet eyes that were zeroed in on you as the anger, the frustration upon his face became prominent the more he closed the distance between you.

‘When will you let this go, Miguel. When we became Spider-Man we knew the risks that we were running with-‘ ‘so you thought it’d be better to take a running head start by taking the leap and then diving headfirst into them?!’ Miguel cuts you off and with an indignant huff he adds, ‘you don’t get extra points for being reckless, this isn’t some little game that you can just come back to when you feel like it. No, what we do is a full time commitment with no room for last minute deviations just because you were feeling more heroic.’

You grit your teeth. You respected Miguel, you truly did and at one point in time you wanted to do right by his little rule book of how to be a great hero. However you soon learned that it’s better to play by your own rules rather then it was to play by those made by others and slowly but surly found a method that worked for you. For no two methods were the same when it came to protecting and saving people but if they both end in the same conclusion, then no one should be able to raise an issue with it. At the end of the day you and Miguel saved people from a much bigger problem if left unchecked; so why was it that all of a sudden he had an issue with your methods?

It never upset him this much before, so why now. Did he think you as incapable? As unreliable? As untrustworthy to fully let you handle a situation on your own? Whatever it was it only proved in pissing you off despite your semi-injured state; you didn’t care that you’ve gotten hurt, you’ve gotten hurt plenty of times before and he never once batted an eye or exemplified his emotions as he did as of right now. You could barely get a read on the guy as he stood mere feet away, chest heaving even though he wasn’t out of breath, eyes wide and his hair slightly disheveled from the way he had torn off his mask earlier.

And yet you couldn’t help but find him beautiful in his anger, for it was like witnessing the makings of a Greek tragedy; beautifully written, yet so heartbreakingly tragic.

‘Why does it matter?’ You spat, getting up, despite your injured leg’s desire to buckle beneath the weight of not only you but the situation at hand. You saw the briefest movements of Miguel’s arms almost stretch out to instinctively catch you but stopping midway through the motion before going slack at his sides once more; as though remembering why he was mad at you in the first place. ‘It never mattered before, so why does it matter now? You don’t hound the others for doing it so why is it me that’s getting shit on for doing the same when I ain’t the first to do so!’

‘Because I love you!’ Miguel exclaimed.

The silence afterwards was almost deafening. Miguel’s outburst quieted you quickly as a thousand and one thoughts raced in your head; how long? why now? Was this merely a ruse to silence you so he could badger on at you for your supposed mistake? You didn’t know what to make of anything anymore now that he said that. You didn’t want to believe it for starters on the basis that not once had he ever shown interest in you, if anything he made it apparent to push you away or avoid you entirely from any and all interaction, and even when he did it was comprised of short responses that left the attempts at conversation to die as an overwhelming awkwardness forced you into leaving him be.

‘What?’

‘I love you.’ Miguel repeated, softer this time.

‘I get that but why-‘ ‘haven’t I shown it until now? As stupid as it sounds but I didn’t want you to get hurt because of me and look where you are,’ he gestured to your injured state, ‘hurt because of me.’ He adds defeatedly. You were about to open your mouth when Miguel raised a hand, indicating that he wasn’t finished, ‘I know I haven’t given you any reason to believe me when I say that I love you. I avoid you like the plague and I push you away whenever I see you starting to get too close and respond in a clipped tone of voice so that you’d loose interest and move on to talk to someone else.’

He stopped talking to move in closer to you, grasping you by arms with a firm grip as all the anger in his face seemingly having been melted away. The raging hellfire that once consumed his scarlet eyes in their entirety had been diminished to that of dying ambers, unveiling his admiration, his worry, his guilt and most importantly, his love; the sneer now long gone was replaced by a softer more tender expression that didn’t hide away the worry lines that were deeply etched into his skin. ‘I don’t deserve you, I’m not worth having you because sooner or later you’ll see me the way I’ve always seen myself and I’d rather you be as far away as possible when that happens.’ Miguel said, making sure he was maintaining eye contact with you the entire time to prove that he was being wholeheartedly genuine, not wanting to lie to you about something as personal as his feelings; He’s done that for long enough, Miguel knew his breaking point was upon the incline and seeing you act the way you did during the mission only fast forward it.

‘Yet for some inexplicable reason I can’t stop myself for wanting to protect you, to make sure you’re safe, to make sure that you never come to harm. At first I thought it was because I was looking out for a teammate, making sure you didn’t slip up and cause more potential problems for the rest of us, making sure that you didn’t let a single perpetrator slip but soon I learnt it was far more then just simply looking after a teammate...’ Miguel paused to blink away the images regarding of the nightmares he’d get concerning you, which were few and far between but those times were enough to suffocate him with fear. ‘It was something more and I grew scared, I grew scared because I know what it’s like to loose it all but for some reason I also knew that loosing you would just be the nail in the coffin for me.’

Miguel admits as he presses his forehead against your own, his hands trailing from up your arms until they’re caressing the skin of either side of your neck between calloused thumbs. He closing his eyes and allows himself to breath you in, reminding himself that you were here and that he managed to get to you before anything else could, that he kept you safe, not from all harm but at least from some of it and that was good enough but he knew deep down that he needed the do better. ‘Don’t make me imagine a life without you,’ he whispers, pressing his forehead against yours just that tiny bit harder as his fingertips found their home where your pulse points were to remind him that you weren’t gone completely from his grasp, ‘for I don’t think I’m strong enough to withstand that reality.’

‘You don’t have to.’ You told him softly, lifting your hands to caresses the skin of his cheeks and feeling him effectively melt within your hold. ‘Not anymore.’

#spiderman atsv x you #spiderman atsv imagine #spiderman atsv #spiderman atsv fic #spiderman atsv imagines #spiderman across the spiderverse #spiderman atsv x reader #miguel o’hara imagine #miguel o’hara #miguel x reader #miguel o'hara x reader #miguel o’hara imagines #Miguel o’hard fic #spiderman 2099 x reader #spiderverse x reader

6K notes · View notes

fuumiku · 23 days

Text

Selkie AU

Ok so on discord we went off. A lot of this is just paraphrasing or copy pasted from buddies hii guys. It’s honestly a fun concept to play with no matter how you turn it around~ I’ll start off with the version I drew these doodles for but it’s all under the cut because it got so long... There’s also always place for different flavors like if they realize the other’s a selkie immediately or over time, etc etc so this is all just food for thought. Marcille is always the instigator though lol, obsessed with him no matter the universe. As a selkie wants to learn more about this human and as a researcher is chasing after this secretive mysterious sea-guy while he very much tries to escape everyone’s attention.

Fisherman Chil & selkie Marcille

Old sad fisherman Chilchuck… He drinks out at sea even. Divorcee dad who’s got nothing waiting for him on land anymore. He’s on the sea every day to get fish to sell at the wet market or to the butcher, the sky and sea’s grey and everything’s dull and tedious. Seals are nothing special either. The only stuff he knows about selkies really could have some selkie storybooks he reads to his daughters. Meanwhile selkie Marcille… You could go a lot of different routes I feel. You know I feel like being a selkie fits with Marcille and her mom, with that interaction of "you’ll have to let others go and deal with that", like in this AU she’ll always be different and will have to leave people behind for the sea eventually here and there and whatnot…

Chilchuck and worksongs... Fisherman Chilchuck singing sea shanties while selkie Marcille sings her songs of the sea and then she hears him and gets curious and follows him back on land or something…… Tries to blend in with humans just so she’s like. What’s his deal. But them only meeting out at sea is very cute as well. Eventually she gets on his boat and they hang out. Melancholic psychological horror sea tragedy-romance would be fun idk. Maybe he starts hearing a woman sing out at sea randomly and thinks it’s the alcohol. But he’d be a goner already lmao. Like don’t get me wrong it’d take a while of actual interactions for him to actually fall in love, but also ~~he’s lonely~~ pretty blonde woman waaaa. Siren imagery hehe. "Hmmm I didn't know selkies had hypnotic voices as well" (they don't. he's down outrageous and he knows it.) Mr "in denial so bad maybe magic is the answer yep for sure". I want her to hear him singing something he used to for his daughters/wife etc and shes like 👁️👁️ who hurt this man........... (Could also work for selkie Chil) What’s his tragic backstory…..

I think marcille also deserves to go silly and catch a carp between her teeth, giving it to chilchuck batting her eyelashes like teehee... I'm such a good assistant right... He needs them undamaged if he wants to sell them but he still makes use of her gift anyway... Puts it in a stew and shares it with her... Something we made together..… Marcille being able to taste human food with actual spices and actual heat and actual cooked meat... His home is the warmest place on the surface. His hugs are more comforting than even the water’s. AGH and how long hasn’t he eaten a real homecooked meal you’d bet 😭 Marcille notices he’s underweight and is like "he’s always fishing though??? Does he just need like, a lot??" and takes it upon herself to bring him more fish to feed him. "He NEEDS to blubber up. I know it." Do you think when his wife was still there he'd come home to the smell of cooking.... but now there's nothing......... He’s on his own, he sleeps in the boat… It just smell like fish all day. The stench gets to him and even the burn of alcohol in his nostrils is a kinder hell. NOW he comes back to the stench of roting flesh and he's like :))) ahh.... my gi rl firned 💖 /j

Selkie Marcille getting onto his boat out of nowhere and slapping the beer bottle out of his hand. It’d go hard if he’s so drunk once that he’s leaning over the railing with his bottle hanging down from his grip and the beer goes into the sea and she tastes it and is like. Now what the fuck is this. Ew. He doesn’t look so good maybe I should splash him with water. She could save him from drowning... Girl who puts him on a rock somewhere until he wakes up and hides in the water as soon as he comes to… Peekinh at him from the surface of the water because, oh dear we're shy now because it's face to face… Drawing parallels between swaying (drunk) and swaying (motion of boat on the sea). She sways his world…… Makes him feel dizzy in a nice, light airy way…… He crashes into his bed in his home and still feels the rocking of the waves under him, and he falls asleep thinking of her…

Go out to the sea in a storm because you can’t stand feeling useless. The sea is your livelihood, it's where you're good and useful. On land you never know what to do with your hands. Maybe he should just let the sea pull him under. let it sweep him away. Marcille does exactly that, but it's not something that erases him. It's not something that swallows him whole. It's something that shows him a whole other world- The coral reefs, the schools of fish that exist below, the lush seaweed forests that Marcille treasures so much. It's all been there for him to see, theres so much beneath his feet. And all he had to do was let her take his hand. This world full of fish and creatures he's caught and gutted... that he gets to see in a different light…… The idea of him trusting her enough to let her lead him underwater... I think the time that Marcille leads him into the water should be on one beautiful evening, with the water shimmering, and the sun casting rays onto the waters surface- enough that it's still scary at first, enough that Chilchuck still struggles against the salty grasp of the waves, but when marcille takes him under he can see just how the light of the sun casts its spotlight on the seafloor- and how even in the shallows therein lies a thousand wonders, ones he's stepped right over before. I'm just obsessed with chilchuck experiencing a whole nother world in there. Give me childlike wonder. Give me a Marcille who wants to show her grump fucking fisherman boyfriend the cute fishies and the minnows, the pretty hermit crabs. Something about the sea looking different from beneath the waves... The parallels of him on the beach stepping over shells and urchins in the shallows with his boots and just crush them right over, not even noticing he did from force of habit and routine having dulled everything… Him working on the sea all the time but never really seeing it because he’s so absorbed in his own shit and he always just uses the harbor so there’s never real contact with it anyways. When the sea water laps at his forearms when he reels the net in but they feel like lashes of frost against his skin. She'd look really pretty with her hair flowy in the waves............ Marcille’s hair should get used for creepy compositions more… In the water she takes him under and her hair tangles and latch onto him against his skin. Her hair is long, underwater it could engulf him probably, he likes blonde hair he'd be happy with that… Not the lowkey suicidal ideation of letting the sea take him and how he’d be happy suffocating in her hair when doing a dive wow ok

I keep thinking about the Dredge AU… The video game yes yes. It’d be a mess but ohhh ohh the sea and its wonderful world but also its dark secrets, Marcille researching the depths and finding dark powers and idk the tragedy of a man at sea who can’t forget what he’s lost and the mythical gf he made that was never meant to be and it’ll destroy them both idk idk. Bc of Marcille helping him fish from below as a selkie, Senshi like YOU ARE OVERFISHING YOU ARE DESTROYING THE ECOSYSTEMMM @ them lmao You are feeding the whole town and making big bucks but you’re fishing so much that some fish are starting to get stale without being bought, the sea is bleeding and the leviathan is hungry

Maybe one time, one of them gets upset at the other and holds the seal fur hostage, its sooo mean but it also feels very them. When I think selkie I think of the movie Song of the Sea and in that movie the father of the protags loved a selkie, the mother, but she had to leave at one point for the sea because that’s her nature etc etc, but he didn’t want her to leave so he hid her skin which like. Ruined everything and hurt her. And ohhh the parallels… Leaving him… Just food for thought.

Selkie Chil & marine researcher Marcille

The reverse of that where Chil’s the selkie, Marcille’s fascination for him has the reverse angle, almost like admiration too. Crying she’d be like "who’s this mysterious guy, why’s he look kinda ethereal(selkie fairy blablabla)?" and investigates meanwhile he doesn’t want anyone to see him transforming and such so he’s like "leave me aloneeeeeee!!" Selkie chil? secretive man who just wants to chill gets grabbed by the most enthusiastic fairytale-obsessed girl out there. She WILL almost drown trying to say hi. C’mon mister mythical let’s have a storybook romance <3 Jumping in da water and he has to rescue her and immediately gains 100 grey hairs. She gets her storybook ‘saved by the merman’ moment but at what cost. "WHAT ARE YOU DOINGGG" screaming, she gets scolded very much but it all goes in one ear out the other tbh. Selkie Chilchuck is even better with his secretiveness... How do you get around the fact you’re a seal? Iunno I’ve never been a seal Obsessed with the implications of his family in this. Except if his wife and daughters were humans and so his work travels are instead selkie shenanigans going out at sea for months on ends, I imagine they’d be selkies too… Did they get separated? Die? Is Chilchuck’s cowl in this one Flertom’s fur? :( Once more mentioning sea shanties Chilchuck btw, Roll the Old Chariot comes to mind… Ooough Song of the Sea from the movie that he sung to his daughters <33 I’m fine

With the researcher angle actually being pushed there are interesting plots and scenes you could think of obvi, but uh we kind of went off on the fisherman Chil Marcille selkie AU instead haha. It’d be cute if she ends up teaching him how to live on land in the end. Dresses him up like a funky lil guy. I went with tallman Chil when drawing it and selkie Marcille’s more elf-like, and for selkie Chil I’d imagine it’s the reverse where she’s tallman-like and he still looks like a halfling… Sea-related AUs are my weak spot <33

No matter how you turn it, Marcille is the instigator lol. Selkie Marcille: this little man… I want to know more about this human! Selkie Chilchuck = tries to avoid everything but this Marcille keeps chasing him! It’s her job to, Chilchuck minds his business!! He sees a sliver of something weird out at night? Not his job nope keep your nose out of that it’ll only bring you trouble. It’d have to really itch him at him for him to crack I think… Honestly he’d make a great lovecraftian horror protagonist lol. We love a girl with no chill and her nose in everyone’s business

Shout to to @dayundying, @cabinette, @soappox and @lucky-fydraws!! These people were there for the brainstorming and the writing of the scripture…

#Dunmeshi au #marchil #chilchuck tims #marcille donato #dredge au #Irish chilchuck ftw #also let’s be real chil would see a naked woman monster and be like oh… i am listening #Mean old fisherman ily. He wonders how seal jerky would taste. Surprisingly kind tho. Would pet the seal #If ppl want more specific credit or parts edited out just lmk #Tallman chilchuck

62 notes · View notes

bookreviewcoffee · 4 months

Text

If we were the villains of M.L. Rio.

Shakespearean passions rage in the book, only they are provoked by human stupidity. A group of students are studying at a theatre school.

The plot centres on seven characters who are studying to be actors and are in their final year. During their studies they have turned into a kind of family, and also formed an ideal theatre company, where everyone is in his place: Richard - king or tyrant; James - eternal ;hero Alexander - villain; Meredith - seductress; Ren - ingénue; Philippa - chameleon, able to play any role, even male.A Oliver - eternal assistant and squire, who plugs holes. Oliver is also the main narrator of the story, though not the main character. Amusingly, until the very end of the tragedy, he is exactly the same as his eternal helper role, though we see the story through his eyes and feel it through his heart. And what a big heart it is!

True, there is an eighth hero of the book, Shakespeare. He is everywhere, because the characters put on his plays, communicate in his words, and without knowing his works, you can miss a considerable layer of the narrative. After all, the characters are not just playing his characters, but very tragically repeating their story without wanting to. From this stems their personal tragedy.

This book is reminiscent of Donna Tartt and her "Secret History", in atmosphere close to the film "Kill Your Loved Ones".

Their lives are filled with art, booze, drugs and Shakespeare. The guys come from different social backgrounds, each has difficulties with their parents and a favourite cause. It would seem that they are like-minded. But they're also rivals. And also envy, and also the vicissitudes of love. As Oliver admits, the actors feel too strongly, so the story is entirely built on emotions. You sympathise with the guys, even when they are at fault, even the exasperated Richard. As painful and emotional as the hatred is, the book describes love. Oliver loves and protects all of his friends, but his feelings for his best friend James and the beautiful Meredith are especially strong. With James they hit it off hard, so it can't even be called love, more like an addiction, they are like Achilles and Patroclus, Macbeth and Banquo. James in his final year sometimes changes his role from hero to villain, but Oliver is still his loyal shadow, conscience and protector. "But who were we? In ten years I never found the right word to describe us" The ending of the story is sad, the author gives us enough information to make up our own minds for ourselves. It's a simple story that will surely stay in your heart for a long time.

"- Do you blame Shakespeare for something?

- I blame him for everything."

79 notes · View notes

bookcluberror · 6 months

Text

I'm obsessing more than I should be over the whole "Kacchan" thing.

Deku's name for Bakugou has always reminded me of how my bff and I had sweet little child-like nicknames for each other in college. We were the Day One, ride or die, overflowing sexual tension that neither of us would ever acknowledge even though everyone else around us had to shoo it away with giant hand fans, type of bffs. We were the only ones who called each other those names. To this day I go jelly in the knees if I hear either of them, even though he and I parted ways a lifetime ago.

Guys. If he had ever introduced himself to someone by that nickname while we were hanging out, let alone someone important, I would have fucking died. Even if he had just referred to himself using that name, instead of it coming from my own mouth. I would have dropped to my knees, or ran and jumped into his arms, or simply erupted into flames ala spontaneous human combustion.

The fact that Katsuki said that... I can't even find the right words. I love all of the bkdk stuff that's come out the last few weeks. So much of it is heavily HEAVILY lined in sexual tension, and is giving bkdk shippers (which I do not consider myself one of... or at least maybe not until like a day ago) a lot to go on. ...But even with all of that development, there was still a voice in the back of my head saying "nah, we're just hoping. This is probably just symbolism and timeline parallels. Showing off deep friendship bullshit. Making the climax more intense and intimate with these personal connections. Blah blah blah" but this one hits differently for me because of how I relate that name to my own personal relationships.

Now it's become... I don't even know. Like, a confirmation not just of their love, but for the unspoken love I once shared with someone as well. Bakugo and Midoriya aren't just a fandom ship for me anymore. Their relationship is *so different* from my own friendship that I described above, but the fact that I still see myself and that personal bond reflected in Bakugo's "Kacchan" declaration... Someone needs to help me put this feeling into words, because I'm at a loss.

It hurts. It aches and throbs and feels like someone stuck a knife in my chest, reminding me of what I lost so long ago.

And it's beautiful, glowing radiant, and feels amazing, like someone has lifted my heart into the sky with cheers and fireworks and *overwhelming* love, from what could be!

And it feels fresh, brand new, yet tragically old and worn. It's warm and comforting, but cold and devastating at the same time.

Why? Why is this? What is it doing to me?? It's filling my mind with fear that this fictional relationship may also never reach its way to the summit of its potential. That I'll lose it, however fictional it may be, just like we've all lost someone before. A few days ago, I would have been bummed but not surprised if the series used all these moments to reflect on, and showcase, strong lifelong friendships built on growth and tragedy... But now it feels different. Like my own heart break (knowing that there is absolutely no way a very popular and mainstream Japanese manga will actually showcase and confirm a homosexual main character couple) is impending.

I don't know how to end this post, because I honestly don't know what I'm trying to say with it in the first place. I guess just that I'm confused. I'm happy, and I'm hurting, and I love this moment so much. It means everything to me, and will no doubt destroy what little grasp I still have on my sanity.

103 notes · View notes

tomboyyyaoi · 8 months

Text

im about to be sooooooo controversial and mean here and like. all love to both and all coz i truly dont think theres a bad ship in trigun but millywood shippers understand wolfwood more than vashwood shippers do

like girl hes a deeply sad tragic brooding hardass with a sillyboy streak who is so goopy and soft for this absolute ray of sunshine whos so observant and open that she saw right thru him like yea the manga lacks severely on millywoods but im smiting people who say it felt forced or out of character in the 98 anime like no maybe u just dont understand either of the characters and what makes them good together

vashwood is such a wonderful tender immaculately written romantic tragedy but ive ranted to death about how certain fans just see 2 hot guys and push them into tropes and completely miss what makes them so good. let wolfwood be soggy we need to end this false narritive that hes some sexy smooth dom daddy just bc hes got that typical Big Strongk Man facade when it comes to his feelings

wolfwood is an emotionally repressed soggy sappy lump who has this impenetrable facade that hes some tough brood and milly is girly and bubbly and ditzy but shes so clever and observant and warm and open we need to respect them more im tired of ppl ragging on them just for being a 98 anime exclusive limited original bc lets be real theyr the only pairing who actually managed to break past their own emotional walls and have sex in a canon setting

#millywood rights im a millywood defender this is a millywood safespace #i do not have a tag for them bc i dont see enough content to warrant making one but. its time

144 notes · View notes

rallamajoop · 9 months

Text

Moreau's secret romantic movie fixation

Most of what you’ll find online searching for cut content from RE8 really isn’t ‘cut content’ so much as ‘rejected ideas that never made it past the concept stage.’ Early plans like having Ada Wong swanning around the village in a plague mask or that Miranda would be a foreign researcher probably never got near the finished game. You can find tons of rejected early concepts like this in the extra concept art that comes with the RE7 DLC pack (or online, for all those who’d rather not shell out that much extra money for a few extra gallery files).

But there is at least one detail from that early concept art that I’m confident did make it almost all the way into the finished game, and it’s that little tidbit about Moreau’s love of sappy romantic movies.

The biggest single piece of evidence I can cite you for this is that you can still find an unused asset for a film poster that was meant to appear in Moreau’s room.

This was to be a collectable treasure item, like Dimitrescu’s lipstick and wine glass. There’s even a description for it ("Poster for an old movie Moreau liked. It's too damaged to read.") which feels pretty significant. There are plenty of other unused treasure item assets in that same folder (I’ll probably get to posting about them later), but the film poster is the only one I could find a description for – complete with translations into all the many different languages supported by the game. I’m guessing that means this one got really close to the final cut.

But the best part? If you look closely at that poster, you might just be able to make out the title. And if you google that title, it turns out this little game asset is based on a real poster for a real movie.

(Yes, that tagline really does read, "When Tragedy Struck, Love Came to the Rescue.")

I haven’t seen Ice Castles myself, but if the Wikipedia summary is to be believed, it’s a 1978 American romantic drama about a young figure skater who loses (most of) her sight in a tragic accident. With the help of her boyfriend, she eventually comes to accept that, because she can still see just well enough to make out the bounds of the rink, she can still work past her disability to realise her dreams. I don’t need to spell out why a film like Ice Castles might particularly appeal to someone like Moreau, do I? Poor guy.

The poster isn’t the only reason I’m convinced secret-romantic-Moreau made it almost to production. Let’s go back to that concept picture again, where Moreau is eating cheese while watching old romantic movies on his TV screen.

Well, the movie may not have made it in, but TV did. So did the cheese.

More importantly, consider the scene where Ethan sneaks up behind Moreau to find the Rose flask unattended. Moreau himself is looking away, apparently focused on his TV screen, though it shows only static. And then he vomits dramatically, and utters the words “Oh Mother Miranda, if it’s for you, I’d do anything.”

I mean, it’s obvious what was meant to be going on here, right? Moreau’s watching a film as Ethan walks in, and sighing at some torridly romantic scene. There’s probably just been some hero or heroine earnestly utter some similar dialog like, “Oh [insert name here], I’d do anything for you!” All the pieces are there except the film itself!

(Do we need to take a moment here to acknowledge the, er, Oedipal implications of Moreau comparing his devotion to Miranda to a presumably-romantic scene? Because... well, it can be easy to overstate that sort of thing, but I don't think it's a stretch to suggest Moreau really would do anything for Mother Miranda.)

So why didn’t the movie make the cut? Why are we left with Moreau watching only static from his poster-less room?

I can only speculate, but a few possible answers come to mind. Maybe the team worried that making Moreau a closet romantic would render their revolting fish-man a little too sympathetic, or a little too comical. Maybe they had trouble finding a film clip that worked for that scene without leaving Ethan awkwardly watching a movie over Moreau’s shoulder for longer than really worked. Maybe test audiences were so distracted by the film going on the background that they missed what was going on in the foreground with the Rose jar. Maybe there were licensing issues around including that Ice Castles poster, or whatever film footage they wanted to show (which I feel obligated to point out may have been some other film altogether). These kinds of snags get in the way of productions all the time. C’est la vie.

The scene still works without the movie playing. But it’s hard to miss what was supposed to be going on.

Still, while I’m talking Moreau, and Moreau’s TV, have a little bonus speculation about Moreau’s relationship with the guy who presumably installed that TV for him: Heisenberg.

It seems to be pretty popular out there in RE8-fanon land to cast Heisenberg as actually-very-fond of Donna, or the Dimitrescu daughters, etc etc – and that irks me a bit, because I’ve yet to see any take on it that feels in-character for anyone involved. Even putting aside Donna’s own issues and the whole Dimitrescu connection, Heisenberg’s seething contempt for the rest of his ‘family’ is not exactly ambiguous. But even with all that said, there are few intriguing hints that good ol’ Karl might just have the teeniest little soft spot for his ‘moronic freak’ of a brother, Moreau.

The big one is that tidbit from Moreau’s diary that I already touched on in my post on the four lords, where Heisenberg apparently comforts him about his place in the family:

Mother Miranda gave me a Rose jar. No one likes me which is why I thought they would leave me out again. But Heisenberg said that was why we each get a Rose. The ceremony cannot happen without us all there.

Now, you can debate how ‘comforting’ this would have come out in practice. Knowing Heisenberg, whatever he said may have been more of a sneering dig at Moreau's intelligence than real reassurance – but even so, just reminding Moreau that he's an essential part of the plan pretty could qualify as an uncharacteristically kind gesture (and perhaps only more so if Heisenberg knew even then that it was a comforting lie).

When I say Heisenberg ‘presumably’ installed Moreau’s TV, I do mean presumably. At the end of the day, there’s a TV screen in Moreau’s quarters that Heisenberg can hijack to spy on or talk to Ethan for the same reason there’s one in some back room behind a stronghold full of lycans: the plot requires it to be there, and it’s easier to use the same asset twice. But it’s no fun sticking to rigidly Doylist analysis, so what could be the story behind it? Have some possibilities:

Moreau got hold of the TV himself, but Heisenberg snuck in at some point and modified it so he can use it to spy on his ‘brother’, without Moreau’s knowledge.

Heisenberg installed or repaired the TV for Moreau under the guise of letting him watch films on it, but secretly also uses it as a monitoring device.

Moreau is fully aware the TV can be used for remote communication and chats to Heisenberg through it regularly. Given that his film obsession didn’t make it into the finished game, maybe that’s all he thinks it does. Maybe he was even just talking to Heisenberg before Ethan walks in.

Though that first option is a workable interpretation, you could also question what Heisenberg imagined he’d ever see Moreau doing that was worth spying on. Our other obvious options are that Moreau thinks Heisenberg installed that TV for the primary purpose of enabling his 900th rewatch of The Shape of Water (oh come on, you know he loves that film), or that it’s so they can talk without leaving home. Heisenberg’s still a creep for rigging it to spy on him, but there’s another surprisingly thoughtful gesture buried in there somewhere.

There’s one last barely-qualifying little detail that intrigues me, and that’s that both Moreau and Heisenberg seem to have similar ideas about Miranda’s plans for Ethan. Heisenberg states outright that he believes Miranda is testing Ethan, to see if he’s worthy of joining her family. And Moreau bemoans that ‘It’s not fair, I should be with her, not you!’

Neither Dimitrescu or Angie echo any similar ideas, and nor does anything Miranda actually says to Ethan suggest Heisenberg has the right idea (like so much in this mad fairy tale, the vibes are much stronger than the internal consistency). But if Moreau has the same idea as Heisenberg, despite being so generally clueless about the Rose jars and Miranda’s intent, it’s natural to suppose it’s Heisenberg he got it from. So we’ve got another possible hint that Heisenberg’s closer to Moreau than his other siblings.

To be clear, none of this means Heisenberg has ever been nice to Moreau. He dismisses Moreau as a moronic freak, and seems unbothered by Moreau’s death. Moreau’s diary makes clear that no-one in the family is nice to him, or generally ‘includes him’ in things (though it’s hard to imagine they much include each other either). Even hinting to Moreau about Miranda’s plans could well have been a means to goad him into conflict with Ethan. I doubt Heisenberg would have had much interest in sitting down to watch Moreau’s favourite movies with him either.

But it’s not hard to imagine Heisenberg basically viewing Moreau something of an annoying, stupid, snot-nosed little brother – pitiable, but not too pathetic to inspire the odd gem of real sympathy or uncharacteristic kindness. Heisenberg’s obviously spent years telling himself that only the strong survive, that those ignorant villagers deserve their lot, that he can’t afford weakness, but it’s tempting to think that maybe giving Moreau that TV wasn’t a completely cynical gesture. After all, doesn’t every Frankenstein-wannabe need an Igor?

To finish, have some more extracted assets of Moreau-related pics from Miranda's laboratory. I just love the style and detail that went into these.

#Salvatore Moreau #Karl Heisenberg #Resident Evil Village #Resident Evil #cut content #unused assets

109 notes · View notes

darklinaforever · 8 months

Text

I have to say that after taking a look at the Doctor Who fandom, I am quite shocked at this insistence of some people in wanting to absolutely specify that Tentoo is in fact a clone of the Doctor ?!

We have seen clones in this series and clearly Tentoo is not one of them. So, what is this insistence on contradicting the canon ? Tentoo is simply the doctor.

Our doctor himself doesn't even seem to dissociate himself from Tentoo ! He recognizes it as him.

That's all. It comes from the regeneration energy itself and from the hand of our doctor. It's not a clone ! Having already seen them in this universe should tell you this simple fact.

youtube

In the words of David Tenant : "It's the same guy." Yes, I know he also says "But clearly he's not.", but that's probably in the sense that he's no longer our doctor. Same guy, but separated after the regeneration in different bodies, including one human, which offers them different opportunities. Once again, the only notable difference is that he's human, influencing his decisions after regeneration. Even if the regeneration itself naturally involves some minimal changes at Tentoo : The fact of being a little more like Nine, logical, since regenerated in the middle of the war after being shot and dying. Plus a few expressions from Donna, as he always takes from his companions after regeneration. But apart from a few minor changes, he remains the doctor. He is the Tenth Doctor who evolved in another direction after the regeneration that made him human. As simple as that. I mean... Have you seen how David Tennant plays him ? He doesn't play a new doctor with a new personality. No. He simply plays his character, as he always has.

I can't understand people who accept the very essential concept of Doctor Who as that what makes the Doctor are his memories and experiences (the very essence of an individual according to the universe itself), and not his body or his personality ! By the fact what makes Tentoo less of a doctor than everyone else outside of the first Ten ?!

Yes. This situation is sad for our doctor, the first ten, who will be forced to move on in relation to Rose. (His final moments of just him with Rose being their reunion hug, when they briefly teasingly discuss Rose building the canon to come back, and when they hold hands facing Davros.) But it's a scenario that makes sense with the writing of the series. It was that or Rose ends up unhappy, or worse, dies. It's the ultimate way to have a happy ending despite the inevitable tragedy for Rose and the Doctor's relationship. We have the right to a tragic and happy ending at the same time. Can you imagine how crazy and unique this is in Doctor Who ?!

And beyond that, I don't see why Tentoo should be denied. He is a living being who remains the same man with the same desires. Except that he can achieve them unlike his counterpart. Again, it's tragic, but it's also happy. Somehow, even if Ten had to die/regenerate to evolve and mourn who he was, a version of himself, in a parallel universe, was able to survive and obtain everything he always wanted. It is particularly moving. Whether directly or symbolically, especially in the context of the romance with Rose. It is literally his love for Rose, and his desire to be human, which also came from Rose when she renewed her love for the human race, that he prevented regeneration and caused by an incredible chance his biological metacrisis ! But I won't go into it because others have done it much better than me. The only thing I will say about it in this post is that it is objectively one of the best romances ever written. (Let's forget the episode with Madame de Pompadour...)

61 notes · View notes

marvelbeingmarvelous · 3 months

Text

Loki Season 2 Ending Thoughts Aka Immediate Reaction and Midnight Ramblings

OKAY BUT LIKE YOU GUYS

I ACTUALLY FINALLY GOT AROUND TO WATCHING LOKI SEASON 2 AND FRICKIN LOVED THE LAST 2 EPS SO MUCH????

LOKI FINALLY GETTING TO BE THE POWERFUL HERO WE ALL KNEW HE COULD BE IN AN EPICALLY UNFORGETTABLE FASHION OF UNFATHOMABLE MAGNITUDE? (and cough actually be the main character in his own show this time around?)

THE BEAUTY? THE TRAGEDY? THE LITERAL AND MOST UNIRONIC MANIFESTATION OF HIS ICONIC “BURDENED WITH GLORIOUS PURPOSE” LINE?

The score? The costume design? The fulfilling emotional devastation?

Like I 100% get people being sad/mad about Loki ending up alone on a throne he never wanted but like…Loki was always a tragic character. Iirc Tom has likened Thor 1 to a space opera/tragedy particularly in regards to Loki’s character, but this does him infinitely better than falling into a void, alone, misunderstood, friendless.

This time he doesn’t let go because he has no purpose—he chooses to walk forward to meet his fate because he’s found it. Both purpose, and friends, and love, even understanding, and dang if that don’t just sit so right with me. I thought it was a beautiful ending that did him much more justice than the last ditch hopeless kind of what-were-you-even-thinking-would-happen sacrifice/death in Infinity War. We actually get to see the fruits of his character development in what immediately became the coolest scene in recent Marvel history.

Sue me, but I love the tragedy and angst of it all. The sacrifice. The love and friendship he found and was willing to give up—and the thing is you guys, he found it. That’s not something we ever thought we’d get to see, not after Thor 1, nor after Thor 2, nor 3, certainly not after Avengers and obviously not after Infinity War.

I still think season 1 of Loki just…was not doing a great job understanding his character, but heck if season 2 didn’t come in clutch and amend some of that.

Can we also talk about how much I love time travel? How much I adore time loops? How dang good one looked on Loki? I go absolutely feral for a time looper knowing absolutely everything because they’ve lived through it a million times.

AND THAT ENDING

LIKE Y’ALL

I have too many thoughts and feelings about this much like UGH YOU GUYS this was such an improvement over season 1 you don’t even know and high key I’d be fine if this is where they left Loki’s character for good and was our final goodbye. He’s legit the most powerful character in the MCU to date now, 1000% lived up to his god of chaos name while even being a hero doing it, giving everyone free will and all variants a chance to live as they choose and sacrificing himself to make sure they have a choice and yes it’s tragic but it’s also beautiful and gosh darn it that character arc that ending Loki finally figuring out what he wants after having had it and then giving it all up for the sake of everyone else—AAAA YOU GUYS ITS SO GOOD

#loki season 2 finale #loki season 2 #loki meta #loki tv series #loki #marvel #mcu #loki tv show

24 notes · View notes

aashi-heartfilia · 9 months

Text

My convoluted feelings about Toga... what now?

So after reading a bunch of metas all over the internet, my feelings about Toga's survival are more convoluted than ever. The fandom is basically divided into two parts:

Yes, Toga died for good. She lived, loved and died on her own terms yada yada (whatever I have been saying in my previous posts)

V/S

The hopeful part of fandom, that thinks after this type of dramatic closure Toga will somehow be revived because it goes against the themes of our story etc etc

...

Honestly, I can see why a bunch of people are saying this and then I found another Dabi Toga parallel which convinced me even more that maybe,...maybe there is an actual chance of Toga's survival!

Now hear me out!

There are literally a bunch of people who think All Might should have died in the Kamino arc, because his story arc concluded there but he survived. He survived and learned to live a life without his power, as a normal person and learn that even as a person be can make great changes.

MHA is not about people dying. Nothing good comes out of it. Twice's death proved that. Hawks murdered Twice but that came flying back at him when Toga unleashed the SMP again.

Plus, we had the Todoroki family arc concluding just before the TogaChako arc and Dabi also had the same realisation...that why not sooner?

But he survived.

Despite all the injuries he survived. Because Endeavour and Touya dying together could also have been a great conclusion to their character arcs but was it fair? Think about the Todoroki family who would have been left behind. Think about the backlash that Shouto, Rei, Fuyumi and Natsuo would have faced.

Touya dying meant they failed.

And then there is TOGA.

She literally had the most chances of survival in this battle! She is also the youngest of the group. Her dying would be a true tragedy because if a little girl like her couldn't be saved then who would?

It's similar to how they saved Eri from Overhaul. Remember how even her quirk was considered a curse?

Only for the story to remind us that her quirk is not in fact a curse but a blessing, by which Deku was able to defeat Overhaul.

Children are literally earthen pots, and they grow into whatever shape you provide them with. Toga's family was horrible just like Touya. Even though Touya burned her house, that contained all those horrible memories, that place still remained in her heart.

Toga finally found someone who was willing to accept her wholeheartedly. Ochako finally managed to save Toga only for her to die such a tragic death. Ochako tried so hard to save Toga, only for Toga to sacrifice her entire life for Ochako.

Think about the backlash it would have on Ochako. At first I thought it would inspire her to become a better hero and save more lives but she was already feeling horrible about making Toga cry. Now she would feel like she took Toga's life. She took Toga's happy future, even if it was Toga who willingly volunteered.

She would live with the survivors' guilt her entire life!

This doesn't feel right because this arc is also about making a little girl smile, and then do everything to make sure that she keeps that smile.

...

So what do you guys think?

95 notes · View notes

rataccatak · 10 months

Text

major grom/plague doctor pages that made me feel big emotions (pt 2.5/3)

yall im SO sorry for the long wait. It's been a year since I've sat down and did some Thinking bout this comic but my love for this franchise is immune to hiatus. I was orig gonna go chronologically but I wanted to post something rather than nothing so here is a panel I've wanted to scream about ever since I first read it.

"I'm not ready to lose you again" scene (Plague Doctor issue 14)

We all knew this page was coming; it is so fucking good. Surprisingly though, it's not the final hug that gets me as much as THIS PRELIMINARY SCENE RIGHT HERE.

Despite Sergey's queercoded flirtatious presence, he doesn't really show much physical affection towards anyone (at least, not in a vulnerable & genuine way) WHICH IS WHY I WENT APESHIT WHEN I SAW THIS. It shows a level of vulnerability that Sergey doesn't ever truly share with anyone because of course, it's reserved for Oleg and OF COURSE it has to come after he tells Oleg to SHOOT HIM if he ever comes close to putting his life at risk. It is SUCH a great moment in Sergey's development--not just the rearranging of his priorities (shifting from his plague doctor mission to Oleg), but his willingness to relinquish control to Oleg. He doesn't say "let me die" or "run away" or even just "stop me," motherfucker says SHOOT ME. It's, of course, a parallel to Sergey's attempted murder of Oleg in The Game, only now Sergey is willing to put himself in the same position as Oleg WITH the motivations REVERSED so that he intends to SAVE Oleg by letting himself get shot. Like. Poetic cinema. What the actual fuck.

Also, "your faith is the only thing saving me" is the most beautiful thing I think I've heard in my entire life. It's easy to think of Sergey as this laidback and callous terrorist who doesn't really interact with the human tragedies of his actions, and to an extent, this is true (he is VERY MUCH an "ends justify the means" kinda guy). But I think his remorseless attitude doesn't stem from an inability to grasp how truly awful he is, but rather, from a hyperawareness of the human cost of his actions that eventually just pushes him to ACCEPT his own irredeemability. Kinda like "I'm already past the point of redemption, so why stop now?" way of thinking. This line confirms it for me. It communicates the absolute DEPRAVITY Sergey assumes of himself, his belief in his own irredeemability, and the acknowledgement that Oleg's trust in his goodness is the only thing stopping him from losing himself to that impulse. Oleg is Sergey's heart and moral center. He redeems and humanizes him when the world and Sergey himself is unable to (exhibit A and B below).

And it is so incredibly tragic. That shot of Oleg reciprocating the hug is pervaded with such desperate and futile but UNKILLABLE hope, like he's trying to physically cling to the person Sergey used to be (or more accurately, who he thinks he is). There's even a role reversal here; now Sergey is the pragmatist, and Oleg is the naive idealist, unable to come to terms with the limitations of his own control. And that sort of deliberate ignorance only further hastens the inevitable, and it is so tragic, this scene. Another reference to The Game with the power dynamics between Sergey and Oleg reversed: once again, Oleg puts blind faith in Sergey. But this time, it may cost him SERGEY'S life, not his. And to an extent, Sergey also put his blind faith in Oleg as well; when the chips are down, he trusts Oleg to shoot him before he can kill him again. Whether their trust in eachother is enough to save them this time... that question is left uncomfortably open.

#major grom #plague doctor #sergey razumovsky #oleg volkov #serovolk #bubble comics #im a mess in distress but i still love this comic to bits n pieces #i hope the pd fandom is still going strong you guys contribute more to this world than most governments

89 notes · View notes

thepetesimp · 2 months

Text

(My) Top 5 VegasPete scenes

Listen. Listen. I'm surely not being original here. I'm certain this post has been made before, especially closer to the show airing, but I wasn't here then, and the spoons for such a post came right now, so I'm doing it now. Now, a warning: my choices will make you question my sanity. They will make you wonder wtf is wrong with me for *not* including specific scenes. They will make you question my VP taste in general. I know, I do too all the time, but the thing is, I have *reasons* for every single one being here and I will thoroughly explain, and if you're still baffled, I get it, I am too, but the brainrot works in mysterious ways. So, let's go (very long post incoming):

No5: The pool scene - Episode 14

LOOK, I COULDN'T NOT INCLUDE THIS SCENE OK? I'M NOT THAT STUPID (Pls don't kill me for not putting it higher, I know, it's a crime, I know-). Fun fact: I had seen a screenshot of the point in which Pete says he's hungry, before watching the VP arc, and I deadass thought it was fan subtitles, like a joke, a meme, SOMETHING other than what he ACTUALLY said. It was very funny when I found out the truth. God, this scene is heart-wrenching for all the right reasons. It had everything I could ever ask for and more I didn't even know I needed. I think my No1 reason for loving this scene so much is Pete's desperation to save Vegas and all the ways he showed it. To explain, we have: - him coming to find Vegas after resigning from the main family to be with him, - him being physically intimate for the very first time to such a degree (he fucking hugged Vegas from behind, I lost my marbles when I saw it), - him trying so fucking hard to say "I love you" without saying it, because he can't, it's not sth he can say, but holy fuck will he show in SOME way, - him saying he's Vegas' pet while dying a bit inside but it's necessary goddammit, Vegas won't get it otherwise, he won't understand that Pete *needs* him, - him killing the guy who shot Vegas without hesitation. I wholeheartedly believe he'd kill whoever that person was, even Korn himself, and I love it. ALSO, can we talk about the fact that the scene was dead silent, no music, nothing during their talk, then when hope is on the horizon a soft melody plays and then BOOM, Ink comes just as Vegas gets shot and you feel like YOU got shot along with him. I love the title of the piece, and I love how it gives me goosebumps every single time I hear it, and I love how *tragic* it is, because what we're witnessing is a tragedy, and would remain a tragedy if the hospital scene didn't exist. 10/10 writing, I can't believe this scene is real, I can't believe how lucky we are to have witnessed such a moment.

No4: Vegas hits Pete with the belt + tasers him when he escapes + finds him unconscious later - Episode 11

I am aware that I'm cheating with the last scene but I love it a little too much and it's the continuation of the previous one so I'll add it in. Ok, firstly, I had to include the scene which inspired me to write my first ever meta post in here, guys, it was essential. Furthermore, one thing you should know about me is that I love - what I like to call - "pre-VP VP", meaning VP interactions up to ep 11 (which is my favorite episode, you'll figure out why as we move through the list). It had everything; it had Pete refusing to eat, throwing his philosophy at Vegas' face, it had Vegas lashing out at Pete in a way he didn't even enjoy (he started shouting as he was hitting him to convince himself he was enjoying this but he wasn't, I'm biting my FIST here), we had Pete using the belt to escape, only for Vegas, the fucking SLUT with the loose shirt showing off his TITS, to follow him outside, we had the tasing and the catching and the soft handling of Pete's body as he fell (he totally carried him back bridal style), we had Vegas believing Pete would laugh at him for what his father did (oh Vegas you moron, he would never laugh at you, if only you saw his face when Gun slapped you), we had Vegas freaking the fuck out at a non-responsive Pete, we had it all folks. I've watched these scenes more times than I can count, they're fucking glorious. And the music too, oh God the music. You'll see me scream about the music a lot here, because it's one of the deciding factors in my preferences, so I have to mention it, just as I did for No5. Unfortunately, Shazam hasn't helped me find the first two pieces used in the scene (when Pete is hit with the belt and when he uses it to escape) but I know of the other two, which are Lost Register and Walking the Distance, which are such perfect titles for Vegas, aren't they? I don't have any intelligent things to say about these scenes, I just love them so fucking much, even though Vegas hitting Pete with the belt makes me flinch, even though Pete gets the worst treatment here (minus the ball roasting I guess), I love them so much, because it's the limit that Vegas surpasses, and the realization he did so was incredibly enjoyable to watch.

No3: Vegas tortures Pete - Episodes 10-11

Yes, I did cheat again but technically the two scenes happen back to back on the same day (it's not the same day, Vegas is wearing a different shirt, but we'll pretend it is okay?) and yes, I did put only Pete screenshots here, look at my name, what do you want from me? When I said I have a deep fascination with "pre-VP VP", this is what I mean people. These two scenes solidified my obsession with this specific dynamic of theirs. Pete was so fucking unhinged and it was the most beautiful thing I have laid my eyes upon. There are too many things to mention, I adore them so much. We have Pete not speaking a single line of dialogue during the scene in ep 10, we have ep 11 and Vegas changing his approach, touching Pete in a sexual way which unnerves Pete but he's still not lost complete control, we have Gun hitting Vegas in front of Pete, with Pete putting the pieces together, we have the fucking phone call to his grandma, which is the thing that makes Pete give up and it's wonderful, because after that we have Pete screaming - I love his screams, I've listened to them on repeat, I have issues - and trembling with pure rage as Vegas toys with him. I've watched these two scenes, both for fic purposes and for my own enjoyment, probably more than 30 times at this point and I loved every single one of them. Btw, can we pay attention to the fact that the sneaky bastards over at BOC put a slight variation of Stable Delusion during the moment in which Vegas puts his hand inside Pete's underwear? Because I noticed, and I hope you did too. A lot of VP fans said they truly noticed Pete here, which is fair tbh, even though I was a big fan of his from the start. He truly shines in these scenes and seeing this side of him is delicious every single time.

No2: Pete's breakdown - Episode 13

Fuck my whole existence, what am I supposed to even say here? How am I even supposed to touch upon this scene without losing my mind? How do I explain what this scene did to my brain when I watched it, and kept watching it, and never stopped watching it because it's so fucking important to me? Pff, whatever, let me try. I'll mostly use the music playing throughout the scene to help me describe my feelings about it. The scene basically starts with both Vegas and Pete being lost and miserable, each one for different but interlaying reasons. The music accompanying the scene is called Unspoken, because neither can really say outright what's bothering them, because they're hanging by a thread and it's so, so good. It's heavy and painful and it creates this uneasy feeling in your stomach, accompanied by the visuals. It goes on, until it stops, right as Vegas says "Isn't my fucking life like this because of them?", because of course it does, Vegas is one second away from snapping at Pete, but Pete doesn't hesitate, he says to Vegas the harsh truth: "It's your choice." And then, Vegas drops the noodles - Pete's food, Pete's nourishment - on the floor, and the music playing is called Calculating Catastrophe, which I *only just discovered* and I want to pull my hair out. The dream is gone, no more afterglow, only misery, because Vegas can't handle the truth, because Pete can't handle the lie, because it's all crushing down and Pete can do nothing about it but accept it, accept Vegas' cruelty, accept the knife in his throat. He's waiting to die, he says it, he grabs Vegas' wrist and then, only when he says he doesn't even have his humanity left, does the music resume playing, the OST called This Creed, just as Pete tells Vegas - tells us, the audience - what his "set of beliefs which guide his actions" is, and both Vegas and us watching are dumbfounded, we're as scared for what Pete might do as Vegas is, and it's so painful and so beautiful to witness. The music stops again as Vegas says "No" to Pete being just a pet, and both him and us are breathing a hesitant shy of relief, only for Pete to snap again, to scream at Vegas while showing his handcuffed wrist, to ask "what the fuck is this then?" and the music playing compliments this moment brilliantly, because it's called Absent Cognition and it's a 10/10 fit. And the most brilliant thing here is how they're BOTH HAVING A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT CONVERSATION. They're talking past each other and Pete knows, he knows Vegas is stuck on his delusions because he can't do otherwise, he can't, it'll destroy him, but Pete himself also can't do this anymore, he can't stay, he has to go, "I'm sorry, Vegas, I'm sorry" (relevant post to this point specifically because I have lost my mind over it in the past). God, this scene is sosososososo good and so them, and I can't stop watching it, I can't get it out of my head. It's utterly stunning and I love it.

No1: The pill kiss/VP's talk - Episode 11

Ok. I am not normal when it comes to this scene. I have based my entire fucking personality around it since 2022. It makes me emotional every time I rewatch it, it gives me goosebumps just remembering its existence. It's because this scene is the shift in their relationship. It's them finally looking at each other in the eye and truly seeing each other. It's a promise in the shape of a pill, it's a revelation, it's rebirth. Vegas being gentle with Pete for the first time shifted something in me, as it did in Pete himself. Vegas is fighting it a bit at first; he says "Take it" to Pete harshly, demanding Pete take the pill, but when Pete rejects him, his tone gets softer. It almost sounds like begging to me and it's so powerful. Oh Bible, the delivery of some lines feel like a slap across the face, thank you. Little House on the Hill starts playing as Vegas lowers his body and puts the pill into Pete's mouth through a kiss. Even the title of the song is softer, their own little world in a little house, as they're coming closer through a promise that ended up not being kept: I can be gentle with you too. Please take the nourishment I'm giving you. And then he gets up, and sits on the floor, and the show literally gives us VP being on equal ground for the first time, truly equal: both battered and broken and looking at each other. And they talk, and Vegas starts opening up already after Pete asks him what happened, and then A Sky Sparkling starts playing as Pete talks to Vegas about his childhood, about how his father beat him up for losing, and then for winning, and I'm a sobbing mess on the floor at this point. (A Sky Sparkling = Vegas' worldview changing, gaining light, a new perspective. Fuck the titles of these songs have ruined me.) You'd think I'd have the most words about my all-time favorite VP scene, but I'm afraid that's not the case. I'm speechless. It'd given me such a visceral reaction that I simply don't know how to explain myself anymore. All I know is that I'll never get tired of watching it, of thinking about it, of analyzing it in my head. It's everything to me. I love VegasPete so much. At the end of this super long post, that's all I can say.

#this post made me want to do a Top5 Pete scenes too #VP scenes not included #(because obv the Pete moments in those VP scenes are one of the main reasons I chose the scenes I did here)#I'm a simple girl I have biases ok?#but yeah I'll think about it #as for VP #pls don't kill me I know I left out some very important scenes of them #the Hum Bar scene the garage scene the NC scene etc etc #but while they're also deeply important scenes and I love them they don't hit as hard as those I included here #hence me excluding them #but it's ok it's VP I can't not love every single moment we got of them together #it's not like they had hours of screentime lmao #*cries*#kinnporche the series #vegaspete #pete saengtham #vegas theerapanyakul

14 notes · View notes

mysticcollectionbee · 6 months

Text

Loki Series Finale (SPOILERS)

I know the end is tragic but like…You guys know this isn’t the end for the characters right? It was the end of Loki’s character arc, and while tragic, it was actually really good! But, the characters are probably gonna come back. Especially my gay dudes.

That’s right, I still haven’t given up on Lokius yet! Hah!

Mostly because the characters, specifically Loki, kinda need to be back:

Mobius is probably the least likely of the two to come back, but he’s a fan favorite now and the TVA guy we recognize the most so if TVA is brought up our Jetski-loving guy probably the one they bring up. Like Coulson and Fury is for SHIELD.

Loki is literally the biggest thing between the Kang counsel and victory now. They literally HAVE to deal with him to get what they want. So…Probably coming back for that.

So yeah. I’m not giving up on the two until one of ‘em dies. >:)

Random thoughts as well:

So…Is Loki the reason the time stone is like green? Most of the other colors make sense for their infinity stones kinda. In the comics the stones mostly have different colors. And well, Wanda warps reality the most, reality stone is red…You get where I’m going with this.

So…The hell happened to Vic?

Haha my post about Loki ruining the Science Avengers’ understanding of time and the multiverse was more right than I ever thought! Especially since the dude spent a century in time loops just learning it. AND the Avengers CAUSED him to be in a situation where he had to know more than them. Hehe

Overall, a tragedy but a very well-written perfect tragedy. So good job, Tom, you obvious fellow Shakespearean nerd.

#loki spoilers #marvel #mcu #loki season 2 #theories #headcanon #lokius #kang dynasty #secret wars

30 notes · View notes

missrown · 1 year

Text

— In which, Jake Kim has a love rival, and to win he proposes???

° Disclaimer: Reader is compared to Shirin, Layla, Juliet, but is not female. There are no pronouns used. Reader is also called "Darling" (i didn't want to use y/n i don't like it djdj) ° VERY MUCH OOC IM SORRY

A/N: if someone proposed to me like that I will die of happiness :") I was watching a movie and the first part is kinda the same—

[Navigation]

Jake sees an unacceptable sight. As unacceptable as a friend's betrayal is. The most absurd thing he saw. Like an awesome movie which ended in a cliff hanger without a second part.

(Not really, he is just dramatic)

He sees a scoundrel flirting with the object of his affections. Someone who has a place in his heart. Someone he wishes to marry one day.

Truly unacceptable.

He has a love rival, and he himself didn't know that. Not that it bothers him.

He is gonna win anyway.

So he walks forward.

In few steps he is right behind you.

And he hears the scoundrel.

"You said you are trying to crack the civil services exam right? I bought this reference book. It has more than thousand questions."

Poor guy.

He doesn't know anything.

It's time for a flashback.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

It was the first date he took you on.

A nice café.

He was asking about your goals.

"Well I'm studying for civil service exam soo haha."

"Is that what you want to do?"

"Well, not really... I just want to do it so no one can say anything bad to me. All I want is to chill at home, go on a vacation sometimes."

He too wants to chill at home.

"What about you?"

He was a bit startled. But nothing he can't handle.

"I want to save someone."

"Ohh...what would you do if you are unable to do...so?"

"I would rather die."

Ok— maybe he shouldn't have said that.

Too long. The flashback went too long. Back to present.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

"Hey Darling! Why do you even need this book — " He swifly takes it from your hands and throws it back at the boy. " — when you don't even want it?"

The look on the boy's face is priceless.

"What the fuck are you doing? Jake?"

Even the look on your face is priceless.

"Oh come on? Why don't you say the truth? Or you changed your mind?" He motions his left eyebrow to the boy behind you now.

"I haven't..."

"There we go! You want to chill at home, and I want my beloved partner to chill at home too y'know."

Jake - 1, the boy - 0 (forever)

---------------------------------------------------------------------

"Is this how you were going to propose to me?"

Honestly, he was not. It happened.

"Well I prepared a small speech..."

"Oh! Well I would like to hear it..."

He smiles.

"Alright, I will do it in the way I planned, I just don't have a ring."

"It's fine, don't worry about it."

It was the night of a new moon when Jake first met you.

It was the night of a full moon today.

The stars are like garland for the moon.

He is on his knees. For a deity who is not worshiped, not yet.

"You are Shirin and I'm Farhad, You are Juliet and I'm Romeo. Let me be your Majnun to your Laila, let me be possessed by your love."

"All...of them got a tragic end, Jake...." You laugh, they may be 'true love' but they never got a happy end.

"So? No matter, it's you and me instead, let the poets in this era write about us. They will never be able to end our story in a tragedy."

"Oh that's, that sounds pretty...."

"I'm not done yet, I'll carry all of you, I swear that I will hang the moon in your window. And the stars to be your jewelry. Just say those two words. I may not have a ring now, but I will get one. I promise."

"Ok then, I will."

#lookism x reader #lookism #jake kim #jake kim x reader #lookism jake x reader #kim gimyung #kim gimyung x reader #lookism imagines #jake imagines #lookism jake #lookism jake kim #lookism headcanons #jake kim headcanons #jake headcanons #jake scenarios #jake kim scenarios #lookism scenarios #kim gimyung scenarios #kim gimyung imagines

115 notes · View notes

be-the-glenn-to-my-maggie · 1 year

Note

GHOST SPIDER GHOST SPIDER GHOST SPIDER

The noccoro angst with this reversal is beautiful! GIVE ME PISSED OFF NETEYAM WHO RESENTS JAKE FOR ABANDONING SPIDER

Give me neteyam who is racked with massive amounts of guilt and torment over not rescuing Spider and having to live with the fact that he's dead and only neteyam knows and can only see him....

I think the only person who would believe him would be Kiri, considering how in tune she is with eywa and her surroundings.

Give me Neteyam trying to help put Spider's spirit to rest, but Spider is so far gone that it's impossible to even try, because Spider's spirit is just so broken from everyone turning their backs on him and abandoning him to the sky people and him feeling like he's not good enough to pass on into Eywa's embrace.

"You left me to die!" Spider screamed.

"I-I never wanted to leave you behind! None of us wanted too leave you behind!" Neteyam cries out as tears roll down his cheek.

"LIAR!" Spider screams as the marui shakes violently from Spider's furious rage.

GOD YES THANK U FOR SCREAMING WITH ME ABOUT THIS. HOW DARE YOU WRITE THAT.

(If you guys don't know what we are talking about, it's the ghost of Guilt by @undercoverpan which is like a Spider ghost version of our Neteyam ghost au and we are all literally insane for not thinking of that first).

I know we've all been on our Neteyam hiding his relationship with Spider shit, but I feel like this is the perfect opportunity for him to just say fuck it and just start saying everything and going off on everyone. I KNOW Kiri would believe him, and I think Lo'ak would too, he looks up to Neteyam too much not too. The tragedy that even if he can get through to Spider ghost and they can reconcile and he can prove to Spider that he loves him and that the kids all care and never wanted to leave him, it ultimately doesn't matter. Spider is still dead and Neteyam is still just seeing a ghost.

(If any of you are into The Black Phone and also are into very sad and tragic ghost love stories, feel free to check out Holding On and Letting Go by Nizhoni93, which this fic reminded me of in the hopelessness it made me feel in the ghost of a loved one being right in front of you, but not really there at all. It's so incredibly well written. Little tw for implied rape/non con, but if you know The Black Phone you know).

Fun edit to my draft of this: got distracted rereading that fic, please have a long list of quotes from it that really haunt me and that I feel really fit our ghost love au:

"He curls in on himself, crying quietly. I lay beside him on my side, head lying on my arm, watching him. A heavy blanket of grief covers us both. There’s a block of moonlight coming through the window. It splits us down the middle, me in shadow and Fin bathed in the silvery blue streak peaking through the jarred curtain. It’s almost ironic. That we’re laying on opposing sides now, like it was always inevitable. This frail seam divides us more than I feel. Light and dark. Life and death. Maybe we were just never meant to be in each other’s worlds."

"When he falls asleep again, I want to reach across that fragile line of midnight, that mystical brink between us, and urge the sweaty strands off hair out of his face. I imagine imprinting myself under Fin’s skin, leaving new and warm dreams of us to replace the cold bruising ones the Grabber left behind.

There’s an anchor in my chest that stops me. I’m never gonna’ touch Finney Blake again. Am I?

All we have is whatever this is.

And whatever this is, it’s harder than anyone can ever imagine."

"Sort of struts down the hall sometimes — which admittedly, is kind of cute. Now that I'm dead, I can own that. Finney Blake is cute. It's not like I have anything more to lose in saying so."

"Instead I could have stuck around and spent a lifetime making sure I was protecting Finney Blake from myself and from anyone who could dare to get in his way. Now I'm the reason he's getting in his own way.

He spends hours in day, refusing to forget me. He's sad when he wakes up and he's sad when he goes to bed. When he's not sad, he's angry."

"I like you Finney Blake...only you'll never know it. You'll think I liked older girls with angry philosophies. But I like you, for your sweetness and how clever you are. I like you for being funny and gentle and brave and impossible to give up."

"'I can’t shake him.' Finney mumbles, his words sounding exhausted and hazey, 'He’s still everywhere. He won’t go away.’

'I know kid. He’s still got me too.'

Fin hitches on another cry.

'Robin…'

My heart perks. I need him to never quit saying my name. Even when he’s sad, I want it to be his. Only his.

'…I know you said I could do this, but I can’t. Why’d you have to go?'

I shake my head at him, 'I haven’t left Fin. I'm with you till the world stops spinning if you want me. I ain’t going anywhere.'"

"He squeezes Donna's hand, but I feel the pressure constricting my heart instead. There's no more blood left in me to spare, but if there were it'd be at Fin's discretion to start pumping the life back into my veins where it belongs."

"That hasn't changed Fin. I'll always be around to have yours, I want you to have me right back. I wish I could be the one to help you break down the walls you've built since I died, instead of being the reason those bricks were laid. Donna Thompson is around to help you miss me, but what if I don't want to be missed? I just want to be in your face and hold your face and kiss your face and make you never forget me."

"'I have faith, just not in who you'd expect.'

'Then who?'

He looks up, steadfast, 'The only person that matters,' he answers. 'Robin.'

I smile at him with a misty gaze. You're the only thing I still believe in too Finney Blake. Fuck it, we can worship each other and every inch of the world around us that isn't covered by shadow. I never want to be in the dark again. I don't have to be when I'm around you. We can make our own light and we never have to crossover. We can just stay together, you knowing me and me knowing you...and that's all that has to make any sense.

I'll stick with you Finney Blake. Pray to me. I'll be your best religion."

"I reach up and thumb Finney's face where his jaw his tensing. I'm braver being invisible. Writing my fingertips over his skin. There's no electricity between us. No magic spark under my fingertips. If I give into the temptation and add even a little more pressure, he'll slip through my fingers. I can't tell if he's cold or warm. I can't feel the smooth hollow of his cheek, or have him lean into my touch.

But I can look into those black eyes and know exactly where I belong. There's a little window of light slipping onto the crest of his irises now, unveiling flecks of gold. They look like stars. If Fin is lost, I'll stay lost with him. I'll float my soul forever in the deepest, darkest shade of his universe.

'I couldn't live without you Fin. Dang dude, I had to go and die just so I could follow you forever.'"

"'This isn't normal grieving Robin. Everyone keeps telling me it'll get easier but every minute you're not around, I'm losing my mind! I'm seeing flickers of you in the corner of my eye. I'm hearing echoes of things that aren't there. It's your stupid sarcasm and your sass and your obnoxious fucking laugh—'

'Hey...hey watch it—'

'I miss your laugh,' Finney chuckles sadly, 'you never cared that people looked at you weird for it.'

'Maybe cause I only had eyes for you dork.'

'And then I think I feel things too. Just now, I swear...' He shakes his head at himself, tracing his cheek softly. I watch his brain working, my heart thudding with desperation. You swear what? What Finney!?

'There's no way.'

There is a way Fin. There has to be! We just have to find it."

"Can dead hearts break? If so, I hope this time I'm done for good."

"I try to shake him awake, but my hands go through him. I hover my palms over him, quivering uncontrollably. I yell out to him, 'Fin! Wake up! Wake up! C'mon man!'"

"Sometimes I catch glimmers of hope in his eyes. Hope for me. For us. Those star flecks burst like supernovas only I can see. But I worry; will Fin accept any future without me in it, especially knowing now that I’m back on the table? I don’t want to get his hopes up. Seeing as how, fate’s got an annoying track record for overlooking the sheer epicness of us. What if once all our light explodes; we're just left staring into the dark mouth of a black hole?

I'm not sure I'm good for Fin anymore. Or is it the other way around? This boy is a torture to me. I'm alive when I'm around Fin. He makes me alive. My heart stopped beating a long time ago. My heart is decaying five feet deep in the earth. But Finney wakes my soul. We're so extended; it feels like he's beating one heart for the both of us.

I know I’ll have to let him go one day. I know I’ll have to make him let me go.

Till then, we can keep being hopeless idiots.

I still really wish I could give Fin what he wants though. Get him to see me for as little or as long as we have left."

"'Are you here Robin?' He barely whispers. Anyone else would've missed it. But by now I'm an expert in all sounds Finney Blake, and I can make language out of even his tiniest, most indistinguishable peeps. 'Or did I chase you away?'

I smile softly at him.

'Nothing you say is making me go away Fin.'"

"We can pretend we're in our own little world here. You don't know this, but I'm laying against the door hovering my legs in your lap because the leg room back here really does suck but also because it's an excuse to get closer to you. I'm not complaining.

Finney...I've missed half the movie because I'm watching you instead and I never want to quit being the only one who gets to see you from this angle. The way your smile shines from your soul and the casual grace of your dimples as you reach across the console and keep stealing Gwen's fries. You have mischievous grin and a fry dangling from your lips and I'm realizing you're my latest and greatest revelation.

Jesus. I think I might love you Finney Blake. I think I might maybe...actually...definitely love you."

"I'm losing my marbles trying to hold onto this illusion I've built around Fin and me. Maybe I died too young for this. I'm too small for a feeling so big, but I can't help it. I know how I feel and I feel like I can't live without him. I guess I don't have to though, do I? I've fooled myself into believing that being dead meant nothing had to change. I could sit on the sidelines like I used to for Finney's games, only this time I'd be watching him live for the both of us. It's sad to realize that everything about me since I've died and everything that’s happened since, is really, pathetically, entirely about him. I can't live my own future so I have to steal his."

"I touch him. Not really though.

Fin blinks into a soft, nonplussed expression. My heart leaps in my chest.

He looks at the space beside him, at me?

Not really though.

His eyes scan the empty seat where I should be sitting and a part of me believes he feels something. That he's searching down a path that I've dragged him down again. I feel guilty for taking him away from this moment of reprieve. Why is it so hard not to be selfish with him?"

"I touch him everywhere where he can see me in the window. I run my fingers over his forearm and love the way his veins pucker when he tenses his arm. I crawl my fingers up the sides of his neck to see if it tickles him and I get sad when it doesn't."

"'Why'd you do that? Why'd you go away?'

'What?' I ask wincing, taken aback by that. 'It's not like I meant to Kid.'

'I don't understand what's happening here!' Finny says, spinning on his heals and pacing in the other direction now. He gestures vaguely and frustratingly at thin air.

'I can't go through this again! It's just like what happened before, except now I'm losing you in pieces rather than all at once and...and...do you even know how hard that is? You were there and now you're not and why? Why are you doing this to me?'

My eyes burn with angry and uncomfortable tears. He's getting under my skin, or maybe he always was and I'm just being reminded of that.

'Hey stop it will you! You think this is easy for me either? You think I wouldn't POOF! myself into your fucking lap again if I could?'

'I'm waiting here ghost boy!' Finney shouts at me, or I guess in the general direction of where he thinks I'm standing. He's about three feet off."

"'Robin,' He utters again, 'if you heard any of that, I didn't mean it, okay? This is all so hard. All I want is for this to be real. I want to keep you so badly.'

I step closer to him, suffocating the space between us. Leaving absolutely no room for Jesus.

'Don't I know it,' I whisper back.

I like the way his bangs get tangled, and I lean in and nuzzle my temple against them. It might be coincidence, the way he closes his eyes for me. We're breathing together. It makes sense to take and give life together. I dust my nose against his cheek and then move my lips over his lips. He pacifies against me. He’s more delicate up close. I'm stroking all his sweet, soft curves and fuzzy outlines.

'This is progress though, right?' I tease him, whispering against his mouth. My voice is raspy, losing itself to the lump in my throat. I swallow it down and close my eyes too.

'Tell me you can feel this Fin.'

'Robin...' I hear Finney whisper, softer and more fragile this time, 'Is that you?'"

"'Dare me to spend the night with a ghost, Robin?'

I grin at him, my mind and heart on fire. I quirk a challenging brow at him, 'What else is new, right?'"

"'Jesus Christ,' she scorns, touching a hand to her head and clutching her hair stressfully. 'You've really gone and fallen in love with a ghost haven't you?'

I stiffen. Fin chokes on his spit. He flushes so red, he looks like a dorky beetroot. We both start rambling like idiots.

'What? Robin and I aren't...no, it's not like that—!'

Without thinking, I look sideways at him. My heart snapping in my chest as I do. 'It's not?'

Lelaine bears down on me suspiciously.

Oops. Did I just say that out loud?

I backtrack, matching Fin's panic and blurting out my own pathetic explanation, 'I mean of course it's not!'

She's not buying it, cocking her chin in my direction and telling Fin, 'He doesn't seem to know that.'

I drop my face in my hands, groaning, '¡Querido Dios! You did not just tell him that.'"

"I sigh as I spider crawl my fingers toward his hand laying on the table. I tease my index finger over his. He doesn't move. Doesn't even flinch. I look at his hand, and at him and feel unbearably empty.

'He doesn't feel it.' I whisper. 'How can this be real if he doesn't even feel it?' I sit up and look at Lelaine through misty eyes. 'Can you help us or not?'

She frowns between us, looking sceptical. 'What do you expect me to do?' She asks.

'I want to be like you.' Finney eagerly explains, 'To be able to able to see and hear ghosts and control whatever the hell is happening to me. I want Robin back. Please.'"

"'I'm not getting rid of Robin.' Finney tells her, thankfully on the same page. Not that I ever thought he wouldn't be. The sting feels a little more bearable. 'There's got to be another way.'

She looks at both of us, scowling.

'Can you honestly say you are happy living like this? Because you certainly don't look happy Finney. The harder a medium latches onto a spirit, the thinner their tether to the real world gets stretched. It's a delicate line. You need to find a way to cut that tether loose, before you end up on the wrong side of it.'

She looks at me insolently, but is speaking to Fin as she says, 'Cut him loose before it's too late.'"

"She can't force Fin to get rid of me. That's not how it's supposed to go. We're supposed to be together!

'I'm not going anywhere. You can't make me!'

'You aren't doing him any favours by sticking around here,' Lelaine shoots back. 'He can never move on if you're always around to remind him why he shouldn't.'

There's a shard pushing into my brain now. Breaking the nerve endings holding my composure at bay. Tears mist my eyes and I choke out weak and pathetic words, 'I'm not trying to hurt him. I...I love him.'

That has to be enough. That mean something! It makes this okay. Us okay. Right?

'You are hurting him Robin, even if you can't see it that way.'

'STOP IT!' Finney screams at her, drawing our attention. He gets up and slams his palms on the table fiercely. 'Stop talking to him like that! You have no clue what you're even talking about. Robin is helping me, not hurting me. I need him!'

'Trust me honey, a ghost is the last thing you'll ever need in your life.'

'But it's my life to live, isn't it? I make my own choices. Just like you. Just like my mom did! And I choose Robin, understand? So you can just leave us alone.'"

71 notes · View notes