#but it’s like the real anniversary of all of our friendships
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big reputation part two | charles leclerc social media au
pairing: charles leclerc x fem reader
a new season dawns but that doesn't mean we don't have a map to our buried hatchets
MASTERLIST | BUY ME A KO-FI? | PART ONE
charles_leclerc
liked by maxverstappen1, yourusername and 3,221,783 others
charles_leclerc: ferrari has been home for as long as i can remember, even before i joined the academy, the dream of driving for ferrari gave me a purpose. i am heartbroken it hasn't worked out, but formula one is, at the end of the day, a selfish sport and i have to think about my real goal here: to win a championship. ferrari has an amazing history, but that is what it is history. in the four years i have been here i haven't seen the drive and ambition to be as ruthless and as complete as they were with michael and with kimi. therefore i have to leave. it hurts me to leave the tifosi, but know you're always in my heart and i will always hold dear your support. grazie regazzi essere ferrari ❤️
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user3: i knew it was coming but HOLY FUCK CHARLIE COME HOME
user4: tifosi lecfosi YES SIR
user5: for real i'm down for him not that clown team
yourusername: i'm proud of you charlie, i knew how much this took. but you have to put yourself first at some point. i love you
charles_leclerc: i love you too. i'm sorry i can't stop crying
yourusername: no i love that you are so passionate. it's been a long season and you're finally allowed to let it all out
charles_leclerc: can we go to a rage room?
yourusername: FUCK YEA
maxverstappen1: pretty please may i join. i have a lot of rage. call it teammate bonding?
charles_leclerc: give me a tow in bahrain quali?
maxverstappen1: fine (NO ONE SCREENSHOT THIS OR HOLD ME TO IT)
yourusername: at least this one i don't mind having to third wheel us
user6: the SHADE that's mother right there
user7: trying to stay insanely normal over the fact that max, charles and y/n are besties
pierregasly: congrats calmar, HOWEVER, i though i was your favourite third wheel 🥰
yourusername: but you bring kika ??? how can you third wheel if kika is there? DO YOU NOT KNOW HOW TO COUNT?
charles_leclerc: thank you pear i love you brother
user8: i love how this is some super sentimental post and y/n is asking pierre if he can count i hope they never change
landonorris: max as fave third wheel ??? @alexalbon @georgerussll63 twitch quartet erasure
yourusername: womp womp
alexalbon: WOMP WOMP?
charles_leclerc: guys i'm sad about leaving my dream team where is the compassion?
georgerussell63: yeah boo hoo there are bigger things at play here I DID NOT SIT THROUGH YOUR TEN HOUR MELTDOWN ON AN APPROPRIATE TWO YEAR ANNIVERSARY GIFT NOT TO BE TOP THIRD WHEEL
yourusername: you fools really will argue about anything huh
landonorris: this is the sanctity of our friendship on the line here
user9: the grid was really like YOU might be sad about leave ferrari but we ain't
yourusername
liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc and 1,421,455 others
tagged: charles_leclerc
yourusername: holibobs with sharlie
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user10: i love as soon as the season finishes charles becomes THEE instagram boyf
user11: j.peg account? no. just taking photos of y/n? YES.
charles_leclerc: i have an eye for beauty
yourusername: heheheheheheehehehehehee
alexalbon: so he can use a camera? why does he only take 0.5s of me?
yourusername: the best angle for your big ol dome
alexalbon: EXCUSE ME ?
yourusername: yeah sorry that was a bit far
alexalbon: it's like you got off the ferrari leash and now we all have to suffer
yourusername: WELP
charles_leclerc: ma belle, the only one i'll actually listen to and put sun cream on
yourusername: yes you will because we...
charles_leclerc: put spf on everyday !!
yourusername: yes! because...
charles_leclerc: we're scared of aging?
yourusername: no?
charles_leclerc: we want to be safe 👍
maxverstappen1: you guys done with the kindergarten reading lessons?
yourusername: have you seen lobster leclerc? this kind of work needed to be done
user12: lobster leclerc? goodbye, goodbye, goodbye you were bigger than the whole sky
user13: see now i'm confused cause why are some papers saying that they're breaking up? or that charles is embarrassed by the way y/n acts?
user14: bestie we've been through this DON'T TRUST THOSE HOES - TRUST THESE HOES
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user15: unless i see it from the horse's mouth I WILL NEVER BELIEVE THEY'VE BROKEN UP
redbullracing
liked by yourusername, christianhorner and 882,339 others
tagged: charles_leclerc, maxverstappen1
redbullracing: charles the qualifying king takes his first pole position for red bull in his first race and is joined by max for a front row lockout
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user18: UNWELL
user19: suck on that ferrari xoxo
user20: *rubs eyes* is that... max being happy to be challenged by a teammate ???
user21: winning three championships really takes the heat off huh
yourusername: THAT'S MY MAN YALL
charles_leclerc: love you baby
yourusername: love you too darling
maxverstappen1: love you three 🫶
yourusername: this is not the problem i thought we'd have when coming to red bull
maxverstappen1: my gf can't make most of the races so you WILL deal with me
user22: max being clingy to charles and y/n is so fucking funny to me
user23: sainz not making it out of q1? shwartzman only making it to q2 but still out qualifying carlos? charles looking sexy in blue? EVERY TONGUE THAT RISES AGAINST CHARLES LECLERC SHALL FALL
christianhorner: mega job boys, let's keep our eyes on tomorrow
maxverstappen1: tell them they have to let me come to dinner with them
christianhorner: isn't this the exact reason we rehired daniel
charles_leclerc: PLEASE MAKE DANIEL COME TO THE NEXT RACE
maxverstappen1: erm rude
charles_leclerc: i'm sorry i'm not used to a teammate that actually wants to be friends for real
yourusername: EXCEPT SEB WE LOVE SEB
yourusername: but for real max emilian i am monitoring the dutch papers... be very careful
user24: healthy teammate relationships (for now) ??? is this what heaven is like
user25: are you telling me that if max doesn't get the lead in the first lap he might actually HELP charles .... a certain spanish individual could never
charles_leclerc
liked by maxverstappen1, yourusername and 2,778,451 others
tagged: yourusername, maxverstappen1
charles_leclerc: wow !! a 1 - 2 in our first race i couldn't be happier. this car is a dream to drive and i'm so grateful to red bull for being so welcoming. teamwork makes the dream work
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user26: tears in my eyes
user27: okay i understand both of them are like with their forever partners but lestappen is also real TWO THINGS CAN EXIST AT ONCE
yourusername: SHARLIE OMG YOU TALENTED, TALENTED KING
charles_leclerc: I LOVE YOU SO MUCH
yourusername: crying sesh. sharlie's drivers room @ 8. bring your own alcohol and tissues
charles_leclerc: just to make sure everyone knows THESE ARE HAPPY TEARS
landonorris: SAP ALERT GET IT TOGETHER MAN
yourusername: i know lando no-wins ain't talking rn 🤨
charles_leclerc: you walked into that one buddy
landonorris: just because i'm friends with carlos doesn't mean you have to come after me like him ...
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yourusername: bold... real bold. you're lucky i'm doing meditation and yoga (and that i want to make a good impression on christian)
alexalbon: lando do NOT look at the text she just sent your your ego CANNOT take it
user28: no no no do spill... i need the ammo if he ever takes out my fave
user29: true i need it for the next time either of the ugly twins at ferrari open their gobs
oscarpiastri: it was brutal. they need to get y/n to host the reading challenge on drag race
yourusername: oscar knows drag race?
oscarpiastri: i might be an athlete but i'm not completely uncultured
maxverstappen1: if we're talking being cultured... GET READY FOR YOUR FIRST RED BULL PARTY
yourusername: born ready my university years singlehandedly financed your 'catering budget'
charles_leclerc: no really i think she's actually addicted to the tropical one
maxverstappen1: are you FUCKING KIDDING ME? IT WAS YOU WHO DRANK ALL OF THEM
yourusername: and what?
maxverstappen1: idk i'm still kinda scared of you
user30: the way charles deflected the questions about fred and sainz ? WE'RE FREEEEEEEEE
yourusername
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tagged: charles_leclerc
yourusername: i wanna be your end game <3
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user32: you guys better be end game or like you're paying for my therapy
user33: i respect her dedication to go to every race, make ferrari staff tremble in fear and pull LOOKS
charles_leclerc: i want to be your first string
yourusername: what if we just called taylor up?
charles_leclerc: you know here you call her i'm nervous
yourusername: @taylorswift paris night one, lover and this is me trying ft. charles on the piano?
taylorswift: sure thing
charles_leclerc: why was that so easy?
yourusername: better get practising baby
charles_leclerc: OH GOD
user34: how did we get red bull charles and a taylor collab in one year?
user35: i guess we used up charles' good luck from the last four years SORRY CHARLES
charles_leclerc: i guess you're forgiven...
maxverstappen1: so could you like tell me what you'd call me if i hypothetically fucked charles over... i'm not gonna but like i need to mentally prepare myself to hear it
yourusername: i have faith in you so i haven't thought that far ahead
maxverstappen1: can you please not be too mean i can't take it
charles_leclerc: you wanna come to therapy with me buddy?
maxverstappen1: i think i might
yourusername: when we entered the reputation era i did not think it would lead to taking max verstappen to therapy
maxverstappen1: and taylor swift?
yourusername: ... and taylor swift
user36: this is all very cute and all but can we have mean y/n back
user37: when will yall learn that reputation is a love album and y/n and charles are just loving each other freely
user38: but mean y/n did teach someone a lesson in not spreading false rumours cause them tabloids have been QUIET
f1tea
liked by user43, user44 and 7,233 others
f1tea: carlos sainz was caught liking these tweets about charles leclerc and y/n y/ln, what do you think?
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user45: put me in the ring with carlos i am being so serious
user46: okay for a while i was on the fence about y/n and how intense she was being but like seeing this shit and realising it was probably what was being said in the garage she needed to do more
user47: for real if someone said that about my boyfriend i'd be in prison
user48: so charles and y/n were under contract to not say a word out of line about ferrari or anything to do with ferrari and this guy is out here liking this
user49: call me a conspiracy theorist but this was his public account... he meant for people to find it and wants people to know this stuff
user50: this is why he DNFed in the first race KARMA
user51: maybe this is why he's always the one with relationship issues bro clearly has no loyalty
user52: charles has never said anything about him even now and y/n only said something in retaliation
user53: fuck peace and love y/n needs to give this man hell
user54: read him for filth
user55: bro needs to keep his twitter fingers to himself and focus on not being in the wall ❤️
charles_leclerc
liked by maxverstappen1, yourusername and 2,311,885 others
tagged: yourusername
charles_leclerc: this is why we can't have nice things, darling
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user56: this is the most response we'll ever get from charles i fear
user57: allow me to elaborate: this is why we can't have nice things by taylor swift is about 'forgiving' the people who wronged you but she literally says "and here's to you because forgiveness is a nice thing to do... i can't even say it with a straight face" so basically charles doesn't forgive carlos or fred. and it specifically shouts out her family and friends and lover for sticking with her which is what charles' family, friends and y/n have done
liked by charles_leclerc
user58: thank you for service
yourusername: i'm reading what they call you lately (it says you're a race winner and a title contender)
charles_leclerc: got a taste of the celebrations and can't get enough
maxverstappen1: KEEP IT PG THERE ARE CHILDREN HERE
charles_leclerc: you're older than me
yourusername: all we said were celebrations, if anything you have the dirty mind 🤨
maxverstappen1: i am usually in the room next to you, i hope this helps
charles_leclerc: our bad <3
maxverstappen1: you don't care do you?
yourusername: not really no. when we get to the same amount of wins as you maybe it'll wear off
maxverstappen1: not on my watch
user58: is this an entertaining title fight but without the bad blood?
user59: and nowhere near ferrari? bless
alexalbon: i hate that i understand all these references
yourusername: lily trained you well
lilymunhe: like a drill sergeant
yourusername: as you should
sebastianvettel: proud of you charlie, i'm glad you're not wasting your talent
charles_leclerc: i love you seb, i'm sorry it took so long
sebastianvettel: make sure you win here, we can be ferrari failures together
yourusername: *ferrari failed you
sebastianvettel: i knew there was a reason i liked you
fin.
note: SOZ. so like i am still working on requests but that radio message FUCKED ME UP. so this had to happen. glad my queen girls (max and charles) did well today, hope you enjoyed !!!
#f1#f1 x you#f1 instagram au#f1 x reader#f1 imagine#f1 social media au#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc instagram edit#charles leclerc#charles leclerc x you#charles leclerc fanfic#charles leclerc x female reader#charles leclerc social media au
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BL 2023 Review
I wasn’t sure how I wanted to write about BL for this year. I was originally going to do a The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly framework for it, but that feels meaner than I actually am about it. Instead, I think I’ll just write out some sections and unpack some things I felt along the way.
I Watched Too Much Again
Last year I engaged with about 92 productions around the world. This year it was 99 (I tracked stuff I completed here). Sure I dropped 18 of them this year, but goddamn. The problem with watching as much as I did this year is that I worked full time this year and also maintained a separate hobby. I also continued my twice-weekly watch sessions with my friend Emily, so there are an additional 100-ish watch sessions in here of rewatching, plus a few other rewatches (Theory of Love and My Ride most notably).
One of my struggles at this point is I’m far too familiar with the genre, and find myself feeling impatient and irritable with shows that aren’t to my taste the way I used to. Throughout the late summer and fall I found myself increasingly grumpier about the genre, and it didn’t get better until I had a holiday and basically slept a day to get some energy back. I also found myself growing apart from fans I’ve known and followed a long time. It’s been a difficult year for me as a long-time fan because my tastes, habits, and friendships in the genre have changed even if the amount I watch hasn’t really.
I Wrote a Lot This Year
I recently converted my watch tag away from my gaming internet persona to just my shortname, so all near-1000 of my Stray Thoughts posts can be found under #ben watches now. I’ve also been going back and adding #ben writes to some of the standalone pieces that I really liked. In reviewing them, the pieces I’m happiest about are my ode to Framboise from Kabe Koji Nekoyashiki-kun Desires to Be Recognized, my post begging everyone to watch La Pluie, my post about what it means to actually like queer men, my SBS ep 10 post that ended up being wrong, my post about the Lavender Scare and Be My Favorite, my Tokyo in April is… post about the breaking of the BL line,
However, the two posts I am most proud of is my half-joking response about why I think tagging each other back and forth across Tumblr in our writing is so important. and The Knowing: Being Queer in BL because I had so much great conversations with folks as a result of both of these posts.
Looking back at my own blog, this is probably the most active I’ve been in my entire time on this website, so thank you to everyone who interacted with me this year, because it really is people talking to me that gets me most inspired to write things down. Big shout out to @lurkingshan who will bug me repeatedly until I blog something that I said in passing.
We Started a Podcast!
After hanging out with @shortpplfedup since Bad Buddy, she got inspired and really wanted to bring something different to the BL podcasting sphere. I had time, and liked talking with her enough, so we started @the-conversation-pod. Now we’re a full year into it and planning out future stuff. It’s been so much fun being able to get things off my soul and break poor NiNi in our recording sessions.
From this year, I think my favorite episodes we did were The Moonlight Chicken Episode, the Eighth Sense episode, the ITSAY Anniversary Episodes, The Wedding Plan episode, , and The Holiday Clip Show. Huge shout out to @ginnymoonbeam for anchoring the transcription process, and @lurkingshan for editing.
The VIIB Awards will begin airing soontm so look forward to that.
Favorite New Term: Business Gay Performance
Let’s be clear, Bump Up Business is not good. It is an obvious BL cash grab from OnlyOneOf that seeks to comment on the fake nature of BL while doing everything it can to trick the audience into believing that the BL pair is real.
Before we got deeper into this year, I was a big fan of a certain pairing, and then their fans took it too far and it affected the way I engaged with their performances and their work. I like that we have a new term for “fanservice” that communicates that you understand that this is for work. (thanks to NiNi for this comparison) I can look at the latest behind the scenes video from Last Twilight and say that I think Sea really understands the work they’re doing, and he and Jimmy have a very relaxed and mature version of BGP without feeling like I’m feeding into shipping.
Do I think they’re dating? No. Do I like the way they fake it? Absolutely!
I can look at one of @respectthepetty posts about Yin and War having personalized, color-coded mics, and we can talk about the next level BGP between the two and both communicate that we know that this is a performance.
It actually makes the extra PR work fun for me again, because now I can just shout “BGP! BGP! BGP!” and it not feel like I’m giving myself brainrot.
Thai BL Needs to Finish Stronger Next Year
Let’s get into some of the show stuff. This year was defined for me by Thai BL starting strong with good premises and then squandering them by not focusing on the details that mattered or leaning into baseless melodrama. Time for some reads. Some of these shows were generally good, but they failed at these things:
609 Bedtime Story: The world building crumpled in the back half and both endings are flat.
A Boss and a Babe: Cher is a pro gamer who worked for a gaming company and there was no plot point about this at all, or collaboration between the two groups.
Bake Me Please: Why was a show about cake so lacking in flavor?
Be Mine SuperStar: You had a real opportunity to explore a fan and idol romance and had Punn show so little growth. I hope the footage of First’s range is helpful now that Ja is out of BL.
Be My Favorite: You redid that whole amusement park date and muddled so much of what the hell happened on that day.
Between Us: You had years to make this interesting. Why are there five pairs and why is the end of this a JC Penny catalog photoshoot?
Dangerous Romance: What the fuck happened to the Sailom we had in episode 1 and 2 before that gun incident?
Hidden Agenda: Tee, what the hell was this? Twelve weeks of this?
I Feel You Linger in the Air: You may be the most beautiful show, with some of the most impressive performances of the year, but you absolutely botched this ending. Finish the goddamn season next time.
Love in Translation: I love you, but that whole kidnapping plot was so stupid at the end.
Low Frequency: I like your OST. That's about it.
My Dear Gangster Oppa: No examination about how gaming friendships become close quickly because of the combination of anonymity and teamwork (shout out to @twig-tea for this excellent summation).
My School President: Saving your gay commentary for the final episode felt like a conservative choice. I want more from you next time.
Naughty Babe: You retconned your own characters to tell a worse story. Unforgiveable.
Never Let Me Go: You didn’t know if you wanted to be a high school BL or a mafia story. It was difficult to watch.
Only Friends: I cannot believe you did Boston like that at the end. Either give Force’s character a clear personality next time, or keep him enigmatic; half measures make him and Book look worse. Sand was absolutely embarrassing. Boeing was a waste. Ending on all of them paired like that felt so unearned.
Step By Step: You forgot to ground Jeng’s external dreams at the end, so the final two episodes are just frustrating.
I’m glad I got that off my chest. We can go into the next year now.
Korea Put in the Work This Year
I really like the efforts from the various Korean studios this year. I really hope we get a Strongberry joint next year, but I want to acknowledge that we had 18 Korean BL dramas I watched this year, and at least three of them I think are must watches: Our Dating Sim, Sing My Crush, and The Eighth Sense. Beyond that, I think Love Tractor, Unintentional Love Story, and A Breeze of Love are easy recommendations.
It’s really impressive how the complaint for me this year with Korean BL is not about them using their time poorly. It’s more about normal drama concerns, where I think characterization is a little weak, or a theme doesn’t land squarely. This rapid iteration from the Korean studios is really impressive to watch, and I’m excited to see what some of the recognized players do next year.
Taiwan and The Philippines Have Been Quiet for Me
I wasn’t really able to connect with much from the Philippines this year except for The Day I Loved You. I never wrote about The Day I Loved You, but this beautiful and heart wrenching show is one of my favorites from this year. I wasn’t too keen on the Oxin Films offerings of this year, and I’m still chasing down the ones from The IdeaFirst Company.
As for Taiwan, this new BL project from the end of the year just isn’t hitting. Kiseki: Dear to Me also ended up really hurting me with the way they used Wayne Song and Huang Chun Chih. I love that angry little man with the white hair, but I’m still salty about Wayne and the general mess of that show.
Japan was Busy This Year
I watched 16 new shows, a few older ones, and a few movies this year from Japan. We haven’t gotten this much from them ever. I continue to love the Drama Shower project from MBS, and my beloved What Did You Eat Yesterday? returned this year. We had pretty stellar outings with Our Dining Table, If It’s With You, and I Cannot Reach You.
I think a third of the Japanese BL I’ve tracked on MDL actually released this year. That’s huge.
Still, I am going to side eye Minato’s Laundromat 2. You were the show that let me down the most this entire year. More than Only Friends, more than Step By Step, and even more than Kiseki. You absolutely blew it. You were telling a great story about a man with an acute case of internalized homophobia coming out of his shell and learning to love his younger partner and you blew it for stupid amnesia nonsense. I will never forgive you for this.
Where Were All the Uncles This Year?
Really, without Jim from Moonlight Chicken, and without the men from What Did You Eat Yesterday? we had an alarming dearth of older gay characters passing on knowledge and wisdom to the youngsters this year. What the hell happened?
Rare Dynamics Won: Second Chance Romance and Friends to Lovers!
We had so much second chance romance this year. It’s really my favorite version of gay romance because gays don’t always have ideal settings when they’re young. We had Our Dating Sim, Individual Circumstances, Jun & Jun, The End of the World With You, Tokyo in April is…, Be My Favorite, Love Class Season 2, and A Breeze of Love. I am satisfied.
Friends to Lovers is actually so rare in romance and we have so many to choose from this year! The best examples are I Cannot Reach You and Sing My Crush, but we also have one of the pairs in Love Class Season 2.
Gay Thoughts
I had a couple of ongoing thoughts this year about queerness in BL.
First, I want to return to my post about Sing My Crush and La Pluie, and how I assert that Men Need to Be Angry Sometimes. More than giving men grace to be righteously angry or upset about things, along with letting them express it in ugly ways, I really want to get into how we engage with these shows. I will stop engaging with moralistic reads on characters in 2024. I will no longer engage with asks, reblogs, or meta gripping the fandom where we're judging the moral fiber of the character.
The question that really only matters for me at this point is: Is this act from the character justified from their characterization, the narrative, or genre conventions; and is it interesting? Whether or not the character is good or bad reeks of the lame arguments about good and bad representation, and I am not watching BL like I’m being graded in Sunday school.
The second thing I really want to acknowledge at the end of the year is that the gay sex is finally getting better again. I watched The Novelist this year, and we have taken so long to get back to the space that show took us on the portrayal of male-male intimacy. We are in the genre about people with dicks. It should feel like it. There should be a masculine component there that feels specific to queer intimacy.
I will acknowledge 2 Cutie 2 Pie, A Boss and a Babe, Be Mine SuperStar, Bed Friend, Candy Color Paradox, For Him, I Cannot Reach You, Kiseki: Dear to Me, La Pluie, Love Class 2, Love in Translation, Love Mate, Middleman’s Love, Naughty Babe, Only Friends, The End of the World With You, Tokyo in April is…, and Wedding Plan for your contributions.
Final Thoughts
I like how broad the genre felt this year, and I enjoyed how much speculative fiction is entering into the conversation. I don’t know how I feel about there being five vampire stories in the works next year, but overall I’m glad that we’re getting more experimental concepts. I’m burnt out on the college engineering BL, and would like to see more shows about working adults.
Despite how grumpy I was for at least three months, I think this has genuinely been one of the best years we’ve ever had in the genre. I made a lot of new friends in BL this year, and I’m excited to see what comes next. Thank you all for spending some of your time with me this year and I’ll see you in the next one.
#Ben writes#best of bl 2023#bl series#thai bl#japanese bl#taiwanese bl#filipino bl#korean bl#ben watches
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Drunken Kisses & Mixed Feelings cont'd
In my last post, I talked about how Kawi's penchant for kissing Pisaeng while drunk might lead to the argument that prompts Pisaeng to say this line:
To my point, @captain-xandis dropped an absolute gem of an analysis in the tags about this scene:
#i totally think this is why kawi stops pisaeng from kissing him in the past #their argument in the future might go along the lines of 'every time we've kissed you were drunk' or something like that #and kawi not wanting to make the same mistake again will only kiss p when they are both sober
This sent me spiraling so I'm hopping back on the meta train once more. Wanna come with? Stand clear of the closing doors. The next stop is...
Why did Pisaeng go AWOL?
Max tell us that Kawi knows/is the reason why Pisaeng goes off-grid, but we never get an exact answer. So here's my two-point theory.
Emotional Exhaustion
In the scene before the second drunk kiss, Pisaeng remarks that Kawi hasn't been free to hangout in last three years? Well, that got me thinking. During the last three years, has Kawi only gone to find Pisaeng when he's drunk and in need of comfort (and kisses)?
Being someone's "comfort zone" can be emotionally exhausting, especially when there is no reciprocity and the comfort-seeker is your longtime crush who is currently in a relationship with your childhood friend. Needless to say, the internal conflict and resulting emotional toll is strong in this one, which brings me to the second point.
Guilt
We know from the 8-year flashback scene (anniversary of Pisaeng's confession) and Pisaeng recalling the day Pear broke up with Kawi that he goes to their apartment often (he even has a key card) which is why this look between him and Pear gave me pause.
Pisaeng's facial expression goes from slight shock to what looks like guilt when he realizes that Pear is leaving. On the other hand, Pear's body language (the way she releases and tightens her grip on the suitcase handle) tells us that she's angry but not surprised by Pisaeng showing up at this exact moment (the fact that she's standing between the two of them in this scene also says a lot).
Then we see her facial expression. She is visibly angry but there's something else. She definitely knows about Pisaeng's feeling for Kawi and their more-than-friendship situationship (her knowing about Kwan and Not alludes to the fact that she's always aware of what goes on behind her back).
And if that wasn't enough, when Pear leaves the apartment Pisaeng ends up being flanked by Kawi on all sides but is closer to a larger-than-life picture of Kawi while the real Kawi still remains (romantically) out of reach like he's been for the past twelve years.
It's no wonder our boy needed to get away. It no wonder he was feeling conflicted during that second kiss. It's no wonder that he will finally reach his limit and cut Kawi off?
And as @sparklyeyedhimbo points out in their post, it's no wonder Kawi is so distraught when returns to the past and is determined to "set everything right" because he simply cannot bear the thought of losing Pisaeng again.
Is it next Friday yet?!!
#be my favorite#pisaeng x kawi#be my favorite the series#kawi x pisaeng#pisaengkawi#kawipisaeng#raemakes#s:bmf#t:meta#bl drama#thai drama#thai bl
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Happy Blog Anniversary
It's my 1 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳. I drew a tiny doodle because I'm already busy enough and didn't have enough time for a new artwork. I made my anniversary post as an appreciation post to my friends.
It's been a year since I create this blog and officially joined the fandom. Of course, I have been familiar with the fandom for more than a year, but one year ago on this day, I decided to create this blog and officially work in the fandom. Time really flies. I can't believe it's been a year. In this one year, many good and bad things happened to me in this fandom. I met many people and got to know different people. With all the good and bad things and with all the kind and mean people, this has been a wonderful year and I am so happy to celebrate this day with my friends.
@its-irsaa-fyp : My dear Irsa. My best friend and my life. I can't say how happy I am to meet you. I will never forget the day when I saw your comment that you said that Rukiyui is your favorite ship and it made me jump to your DM and chat with you. That day I realized how much we have similar opinions and interests. I will never forget that you always supported me when some people made me sad. And I will never forget how you made me not leave this fandom and love it more and more. And also how much we both admire Yui and she is our queen. I am happy that I met you and it was the best thing in my life. I love you 💘🥺❤️.
Admin Ava: Ava, my dear friend. I love you very much Thank you for always supporting me and supporting me in making a blog for DL fandom. You are so kind and I will never forget your love and support. I love you my dear friend 💘🥰.
Semra: Dear Semra, even though you left the fandom, I will never forget your support and kindness. I had the best role-play with your lovely OC. Yuu will forever remain in my heart and she will forever be Yui's best friend. The memories of you and your OC will always remain in my heart.
@shuyui-nether : My dear cousin and my dear sister. I'm sorry that I dragged you to diahell 😅. In real life you are the closest person to me and I am happy that you are with me in this fandom. I love you.
@seaoflove07 : Dear Christine, you were one of the first people who supported me and my blogs. You are very kind and I can't say how much I appreciate that whenever I was not feeling well, I talked to you and you gave me peace 😭🥺. I love you very much and I hope this friendship will grow.
@callmeklair: Well, I must say that wherever there is a Yui stan, that person will become my best friend 🤭😅. I don't know how this friendship started. I just remember that we talked and became best friends. Maybe Yui affects us so much that she makes us like each other quickly. I am very happy that I met you and we made a small friendship group with you and our friends 🥰💘. I hope this friendship will last forever.
@diabolik-art-blog : Moni, my energetic and funny girl. Thank you very much for always making me laugh and making me feel happy even in the worst situations. I admire your immense energy and your creativity in creating new stories. You make our friendship group happier and full of laughter, and I am very happy to have an energetic and kind friend like you 😘🥰💘.
@uusercatt367 : Well, here is one of my favorite artists. And as I said, wherever I see a Yui stan, that person is my friend. I also love your OCs and I admire your love for Yui. I hope we interact more and more in future 🥰💘.
Honorable mentions: @gagad @yuukanaazu @diakaoni @midnight-glasses @hoshikoyuuki @rukiyui-fanblog @nowothingistired @yuiistan @kashifah @hellcatinnc @anin13 @dialovers-lover-xoxo : Thank you all for your support. I hope we will interact more in the coming years.
#1 year tumblrversary#tumblr milestone#admin talks#admin afra#admin afra talks#diabolik lovers#diabolik lovers fandom
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Still With You | A Jeon Jungkook Series | Chapter 5
Summary: Jungkook comes to pick you up for your "date".
Pairing : Luna (reader) x Jungkook and Jimin, f2l love triangle
Word Count: 5.7k~
Warning: Explicit Language, a panic attack and mentions of death by car accident (nothing graphic)
a/n: I already had this written so I thought I would post the next part to kind of fill up the gap before the next update for Just Take It
Start from the beginning
After coming back to the store from my meet up with Jimin I can't help but space out while, waiting for time to pass by. Jungkook's coming to pick me up for our "date" as he likes to call it soon and I get a bit nervous thinking about how things are gonna go. I hope he likes what I have planned but knowing him, he would probably enjoy doing anything as long as we're together.
That's why our friendship work so well. We can literally be laying down on the floor and staring at the ceiling and still have so much fun just talking about anything and everything. Then once we run out of things to say we never feel pressured to keep the conversation going. We just sit in comfortable silence.
I do admit that half the time when that happens I end up falling asleep, but Jungkook doesn't seem to mind. He'll just sit there or lay there next to me and play with my hair which only helps me fall into an even deeper sleep. My favorite place in the whole world is when I'm with him. I just feel so safe that it doesn't even matter where we are.
I can't help but smile thinking of all the times we've spent together and how much he's helped me since the beginning. He was there for me when I got my first period and even though he didn't know what was going on, he still stayed with me and helped take care of me. We were in middle school but he still showed that sense of maturity in him that I always admired. Although I wish some of it would've rubbed off on me.
I feel like I've still got a lot to learn and I'm still so naïve when it comes to a lot of things. Jungkook is there for me when times get tough that I'm not sure if I could've gotten though half of the things I've gone through if it wasn't for him.
The time that Jungkook and I met wasn't the happiest time in my life and but somehow he showed up and helped me through it. We met on the day of my parent's funeral.
I was only six and I was in the car with them but I was the only one who survived. Everyone came back to my old house after the funeral service was done and I just couldn't handle being there without my parents by my side anymore so I ran to the park and hid on my own behind a tree and cried my eyes out.
I hadn't cried since the accident happened and I knew that if I broke down in front of everyone or went to my room I would just get scolded. They would probably say I was being selfish and some of them resent me because my parents didn't survive, especially my grandmother.
She used to be kind and loving but once my parents died she blamed me for taking her son away from her. She even told me that she would trade me for him if she could when it hit the ten year anniversary of their death.
The time she said that was the last time I ever saw her. I was seventeen and done with being reprimanded for the fact that I survived. They act like I was the one who caused the crash or that I could've somehow prevented it.
While I was crying at the park after the funeral a little boy came up to me because he had heard me crying.
Some kids might tease you for crying or try to figure out why you're upset, but not him. He simply sat next to me and stayed with me until I calmed down. He asked me what my name was and I told him and he offered up his name right after "My name is Jungoogie but my real name is Jungkook. But you can call me whatever you want" he said simply with a smile.
He reached out his hand to help me up off the ground and asked me if I wanted to play with him. I was hesitant at first but said okay and we played for hours before he had to go. "I'm sorry Luna but I have to go now, my mom says dinner is ready. Do you wanna play again sometime?" he said with a cute bunny smile. I noded my head in turn, happy to have made a new friend.
He waved goodbye and ran off towards his mom "Meet me back here tomorrow and we can play tag!" he yells turning to me and waving once more before running down the street back to his house. After that day we played together everyday after school until it was time to go home.
I moved to a different part of the city when we got a bit older but Jungkook begged his mom to send him to the same school as me and so we could stay together. We were in the same class, we joined all the same clubs, we even had the same backpack. We were inseparable.
Grey came along later and with how antisocial and lonely she seemed most days in class I couldn't help but adopt her into our friend group. She had come in at the middle of the year school year in 6th grade and I just wanted her to have at least one friend.
I know I hated being left out when I was younger so I just kept bugging her everyday until she finally accepted the fact that I wasn't gonna leave her alone. From then on the three of us have been the best of friends. Although most days Grey still acts like she can't stand us I know that she loves us in her own way.
Once I start to come out of the fog that is my daydream I realize that it's almost time for him to come get me.
"I so excited for tonight!" I gush to Grey. "Did I ask?" she responds checking out her cuticles sounding uninterested. "Oh come on I know you're just jealous" I say nudging her shoulder teasingly. "Jealous? Of you and Jungkook? I'm just happy you two are gonna leave me alone for the rest of the night. Just make sure to finish up your share of the work before you leave" she says reminding me that I am in fact still on the clock.
"Shit, yeah about that" I start off tentatively. "No Luna you've been slacking off all night, you cannot leave me to do all of your work for you" she says ready to cut me off before I can even ask. "Oh come on, I promise I'll make it up to you I swear! Plus you came in late today so I could've had this all done if I wasn't left alone for so long" I say guilt tripping her. She rolls her eyes and I can see her defense slowly crumbling.
"Lunch for a week" she huffs out. "Thank you thank you thank you! You're an absolute gem!" I say giving her a quick squeeze. "Yeah whatever, can you at least straighten up the snacks over there until he comes to pick you up?" she says waving her hand over towards the shelves in question while scrolling through her phone clearly becoming more and more uninterested in my existence. "Yup you got it!" I say while heading over to take care of it.
I end up humming some random song while rearranging all of the various misplaced items. I wonder if I should buy some to go along with the other food I brought. I ponder this while putting the finishing touches on the section. "Guess who" I hear someone say behind me while covering my eyes.
"Kook! Happy Friendiversary!" I say while turning around to give him a huge hug. "Happy Friendiversary Luna but haven't I told you to stop day dreaming while at work. Someone could really end up sneaking up on you or wor-". I hold my hand up to stop his lecture before it goes any further.
"No more nagging tonight, it's a special occasion right? Let's just relax and have a good time alright?" I say bringing my hand down and grab his in turn. "Wow Noona when did you suddenly become a rapper?" he says with a cheeky smile. I lift my arm up to hit him but he dodges before I can make contact.
"Alright alright no more nagging" he says, finally giving in. I thought for sure that he would try to protest a bit further but luckily he decides against it. "Are you ready to go?" he asks starting to perk up again. "Yep last thing is for us to pick out some snacks and drinks before we leave and then we'll be good to go. Do you have anything in mind?" I say already knowing his answer but I can't help but want to see the joy on his face as he picks out his favorite snacks.
"Yes, and I'm paying!" he says, rushing around the store. "But wait I was the one who mentioned it!" I say in protest. "Yeah but you brought the rest of the food right?" he says. "Touché" I respond, shaking my head.
Once we're done I grab the picnic basket, my bag and some blankets from the back and we say goodbye to Grey as he leads me over to where his brother's truck is parked. "Wow is it just me or does this look a lot nicer?" Jungkook chuckles at me in response. "No it's not just you. He got a newer version of the same model" he informs me.
"Oh okay that makes sense! Looks like it's a bit smaller though" I say concerned about the space. "Yeah it looks smaller but I promise once you get inside it's actually quite spacious. Why are you worried about that though? You've been very secretive about this whole thing so I'm starting to get anxious" he teases.
"Hey have I ever let you down?" I say walking around to the passenger side and getting in. "Yes, multiple times" he responds with a straight face, answering the question very seriously in a way to tease me further while he goes and gets in on the driver's side. Leaving me scoffing in response while getting in the car.
"Hey I'm just being honest here" he says with a mischievous grin on his face. "Do you really want me to list them off because it might take a while. Okay well there was this one ti-" "Okay okay I get it you can stop now" I say placing my hand over his mouth. I expect him to lick my hand in response like he always does but this time he decides to kiss it instead. I widen my eyes not sure how I should respond and I can feel my cheeks start to warm up. I yank my hand back after he decides to deliver a few more kisses clearly satisfied with my reaction.
"Why are you being so weird today?" I ask, laughing it off. "I don't know what you're talking about" he says ,sitting back to put his seatbelt on. I mirror his actions and try to shake off the butterflies that had suddenly crept up on me. He backs out of the parking lot and flawlessly with one hand on the steering wheel and the other on the back of my headrest taking quick glances to the back when necessary. I can smell his sent from here and I can't help but feel myself getting intoxicated by it.
"You okay?" he asks, looking over at me now having turned his body a bit more to gain a wider view out the back window to make backing up a bit easier which ends up making our proximity closer than what I had anticipated. I mentally curse myself for glancing down at his lips which he clearly saw me do since he currently has his full attention on me.
"I- um- yeah I'm fine" I say getting a bit flustered yet again. "You sure?" he questions further with a slight chuckle. "Mhm" I respond, afraid I'll say something stupid.
"Okay so..." he starts, "So?" I question by echoing him, feeling a bit perplexed. "Are you gonna tell me where we're going or am I gonna have to read your mind?" he teases again this time accompanied with a half smile that makes my heart flutter. "Oh yeah my bad, just go here" I say putting the address into the navigation system. He glances over at me and shakes his head while making the first turn out of the parking lot.
"Okay spill there's clearly something going on with you" he says not giving up on me. "I'm just nervous about tonight. I'm afraid you might not like it or think it's weird" I say giving an excuse that isn't totally truthful but it'll work for now.
"Luna you know that as long as we're together I couldn't care less what we do. Now just take a deep breath and pull up your playlist, you're the DJ this time" he says while handing me the aux cord. I glance over at him with childlike joy as I quickly plug my phone in and start playing some of our favorite songs.
The atmosphere starts to get a bit more comfortable after I start to loosen up with the music and I eventually forget why I got so nervous in the first place.
"You know I really missed you" he says all of a sudden glancing over at me. "What makes you say that?" I say chuckling a bit at the random sentiment. "Can't a guy just miss his best friend? I feel like it's been ages since I last saw you" he says with a slight pout. "Kook you just saw me a couple days" I say laughing again.
"So? I like spending time with you" he say defiantly. "Well unfortunately that's what happens when you grow up. We're not kids anymore Kook" I say starting to feel a bit sad at the fact. "Hey no sad talk! We're supposed to be having fun right?" he says pushing away those negative feelings.
"Yeah, you're right" I say admitting fault. "Why don't you tell me about your day" he says showing interest but still keeping his eyes on the road which gives me a chance to admire his side profile. I can't help but notice the scar on his face even in this dim lighting and I still remember how he got it. Time really does fly.
"Y/n" he says calling me back to reality. "Huh what?" I say embarrassed that I got caught staring at him. "How was your day?" he repeats chucking at my awkward demeanor. "Oh um, it was okay, not very eventful. Although I did see a man outside chasing a pigeon for a couple of hours" I say laughing at the memory.
"What? Why?" he says with amusement and disbelief laced in his tone. "All I know is he never did catch that bird" I end shaking my head. "Sounds like the bird put up a good fight" he says, shaking his head in unison. "Any grown man that's crazy enough to chase a bird around is definitely someone I would not want to be around" he finishes.
"What about that one time the bird in our 6th grade class escaped?" I say teasing. "I thought we agreed to never speak of that day" he says suddenly getting serious. "Oh come on, it was hilarious the way he-" "Nope shut up" he says cutting me off. "Ya! How dare you tell your Noona to shut up!" I say faking offense. "But I'll let it slide this time since it's our anniversary" I finish with a cheeky smile. He rolls his eyes as we continue our journey to our destination.
As as we come upon the small mountain range the navigation system soon signals that we've arrived. "Um what are we supposed to do here?" he says a bit confused. "Shhh don't worry about it. Just go up here and turn right when you reach the dirt road and follow it all the way up okay?" I instruct. "Alright, you're the boss" he says laughing it off and following my instructions.
Once we get to the end of the dirt road we reach a gate with a 'Private Property' sign hanging on it. "Hey I thought you said we weren't gonna do anything illegal!" he yells after me. "It's not illegal! Just, you know, private" I say brushing it off. "Uh huh" he says not convinced. I wave him forward after having opened the gate.
"Have you been here before?" he asks once he turns the engine off and starts to get out. "Once, with Grey. Her family actually owns this property so you don't have to worry about us being here. Okay?" I say going up to him and placing my hand on his arm. "Okay" he says smiling down at me. I fell myself falling into his star filled gaze which eventually reminds me of why we're here.
"Oh! Right I forgot to tell you what we're doing here" shaking myself out of the slight trance I had fallen into. He shakes his head at me and waits for me to continue. "Stargazing" I say with childlike joy. "I know we had always talked about doing it some day but there are just too many lights in Seoul that it makes it difficult to see them so once I came here I just knew I had to bring you!" I finish off looking out at all the stars.
I welcome the comforting embrace I feel wrapping around me from behind. "You're the best" he says resting his head on top of mine. "I know" I say in amusement. "No for real this is amazing" he says encouraging me to look up at him. "I'm glad you like it" I say smiling up at him. I feel those butterflies from earlier start to flutter again and I have to drag my gaze back up towards the sky.
"Should we start getting the stuff out of the car?" I suggest. "Yeah, in a minute" he says tightening his embrace around me. This moment feels way more intimate than I had planned for but I can't help but enjoy the feeling. After another minute or two I nudge his side in an effort to get him to release me, "Come on let's set everything up". "Okay okay" he says, letting go but not before placing a soft kiss on top of my head.
Soon after we've finished putting the final touches on everything I step back and admire our hard work. We've laid down some blankets and pillows in the truck bed and we have a picnic basket full of all the food I had prepared, paired with the snacks Jungkook bought and my laptop fully charged with Netflix pulled up. Jungkook gets into the back and makes himself comfortable.
"So are you just gonna stand there all night or what?" he says teasing me for not getting in fast enough. I throw my head back in playful irritation, letting out a sigh and coming back up to give him a slight smile. "Then come here" he says with his arm held out to help me up. Once I'm up and go to sit down he holds onto my hips and guides me down to sit right next to him. If I was any closer to him I would be on his lap.
I look up at him after settling in his embrace. "What?" he questions with a sheepish smile on his face. "Nothing I say turning my attention towards my laptop. "So what are we watching?" I question. "I don't have anything in mind" he says looking up at the stars. "Well are you hungry?" I question laughing at his indifference.
"Can you just put some music on? I wanna stargaze for a bit" he says, keeping his eyes on the sky. "Sure" I reply, smiling at his concentration. I put a low-fi playlist on low and lean back into his embrace. We stay there and look up at the stars in silence for a while, enjoying the peace and tranquility of the moment.
"Hey" I say in a hushed tone looking up at him. "Hmm" he hums, bringing his gaze back down to me. "Penny for your thoughts?" I ask, feeling slightly breathless at the proximity. He decides go back to looking up at the stars before he starts to answer.
"Just thinking" he says mindlessly. "About?" I question. "Stuff" he says. "What kinda stuff?" I say playing into his game. "All kinds of stuff" he says and I can't help but get tired of the guessing game. I playfully hit his chest in response, "Ouch!" he groans looking down at me while clutching his chest.
"I thought we told each other everything" I say pulling away and facing him with my arms crossed over my chest. "You'll know soon enough" he says poking me in my side making me flinch. "Yah! I told you to stop doing that" I say hitting his chest again. "I'm sorry your reaction is just too adorable I can't help it" he says laughing at my irritation. "Whatever" I say exasperated
"So are you hungry now because I haven't eaten since lunch" I say hoping he's ready to start eating as well. "Nah maybe later" he says sitting back and dragging me along with him knowing that I won't eat without him. "Hey come on I'm hungry" I say, dragging my words out. "Alright fine let's eat" he concedes, sitting back up and letting me go but not before giving me another jab in my side.
Once we finish eating and pull up a movie to watch I can feel him getting a bit restless.
"What's wrong?" I ask, pulling away from his embrace, concerned with his demeanor all through out the night. "What makes you think somethings wrong?" he answers my question with a question. "You've been acting really weird, like I don't know, different. You're starting to make me nervous" I admit.
"Nervous how?" he say sitting up and reaching out for my hand. "I don't know I can't really describe it" I say jumping a bit at the contact. "Try" he urges while starting to play with my fingers. "I feel like every time you touch me my skin starts to heat up. When you look at me I can't help but want to either look the other way or get lost in your eyes. When you get too close I start to feel butterflies in my stomach. I'm confused" I say looking away, embarrassed to admit it and contradicting my previous claim.
"Are you sure I'm the one that's acting different?" he asks, trying to catch my gaze. "Why are you making me feel like this?" I ask, hoping he has the answers like he always does. "Do you wanna know what I was thinking about earlier?" he asks, coming closer and bringing his hand up towards my face to cup my cheek. "Yes" I say getting breathless again. "This" he says leaning in and bringing his face closer to mine.
"I-" I choke out looking down at his lips and back into his eyes once I realize he stopped right before making contact. "I'm not gonna do anything you don't want me to" he says while letting his breath fan my face. "It's your choice" he says glancing down at my lips. I wait a second hesitating before I take a quick breath and close my eyes before leaning forward just enough to make contact.
It's a soft chased kiss, he tastes so sweet and I can't help but want more. It's over just as quickly as it had started and he pulls away slightly making eye contact and once he sees that I wanted it just as much as he did he leans in again, deepening the kiss and placing his hand on my waist in an effort to pull me closer.
I oblige and make moves to do just that and he accelerates the process by dragging me over making me straddle his lap. "Hasty are we?" I tease. "Shut up" he says quickly going back in to continue kissing me like I might disappear if he stops.
It all starts to get more intense once he starts to add tongue, leaving me pulling away for a second, resting my forehead against his in an effort to catch my breath. "You okay? Is this okay?" he asks sounding just as breathless as me. "Yeah just- just give me a second" I say trying to clear the fog that's clouding my judgement at the moment.
"Kook" I say in an effort to get his attention which is ultimately unnecessary since he hasn't been able to take his eyes off me since we started kissing. "Hmm?" he hums waiting for me to continue. "I don't think we should be doing this" I say worried about what his reaction might be. "Why?" he asks, searching my face for answers since I'm not getting them out fast enough.
"I don't know it's just- well you're my best friend" I start off. "And you're mine" he says reciprocating my statement. "We've been friends since we were kids and I really don't want to mess that up. I care about you too much to do that and I don't want to lose you" I say looking down at my lap suddenly getting shy.
"Hey" he says placing his finger under my chin to angle my face up regaining eye contact. "You're never gonna lose me" he says with a slight smile. "Well what if we do this and it ends badly? What if one of us gets hurt and we can't go back to how we used to be? What if-" I ramble off but am soon cut off by Jungkook's lips on mine.
"You worry too much. Y/n it's just me and I'll love you no matter what. You know that right?" I turn away and look off to the side, shy under his piercing gaze. "Kook I-" I start. "Do you love me?" he says cutting me off again. "Of course I love you" I say looking back up at him. "No but do you love me? Like do you think you might be in love with me?" he clarifies vulnerability written all over his face. "Do you think you could fall in love with me?" he says above a whisper, looking back down at my lips waiting for my response.
"I don't know" I say getting off his lap. "Don't know what? You don't think you could fall in love with me?" he asks, pleading for an answer. "I'm confused okay. I don't know how I feel about everything. It's all gotten so complicated, I just- I don't know okay" I throw my head into my hands and feel myself tear up, overwhelmed with all these old and new feelings resurfacing all at once.
"Luna" he says placing his hand on my thigh when he starts to see the onset signs of a panic attack. "Y/n come here" he says, pulling me closer, shielding me for the cold that had suddenly become more apparent.
He's been there for me through almost all of my panic attacks and knows exactly how to get me to ride out the wave and gradually calm me down. He knows that I feel safe with him and so he makes sure to use that when I need it most. Pulling a blanket over the two of us he holds me in a gentle embrace and places soft kisses on my temple.
"It's okay you don't have to say anything, let's just focus on getting through this. It's just me, I'm sorry if I scared you. I'm so sorry" he apologizes, rubbing my back and bringing me back down, hoping to soothe all of the muscles in my body that started to tense up and bring my breathing back to normal. I grab onto his shirt and tug on it in an effort to ground myself, still shaking I start crying into his chest which only worsens the tight feeling I have coiled up in my chest.
My panic attacks aren't usually this bad but for some reason it just started to wash over me. I haven't had a lot of time to process much of anything these days and even when I do I fill up that time with distractions in an effort to drown out all of the thought running through my head that make me dizzy.
I started to have them around the time my parents passed away and after I met Jungkook. Looking back on it he didn't really do much of anything, he just sat there and waited patiently for me to stop crying, just like he did when we first met. But once we got closer it evolved to him holding onto me to help calm me down and talking me through it a bit.
Ever since the beginning he wanted to make sure I never felt the need to hide and cry alone like that ever again. He wanted to give me more reasons to smile and laugh than cry. Or at least that's what he's told me. He starts to make an effort to make his breaths more audible trying to get me to follow along with him and I so the best that I can.
Once I do I pull away and keep my eyes turned down, trying to hide my embarrassment. You think by now I wouldn't be embarrassed by it anymore but I can't help it. Once I stop sniffling and he hears my breathing get back to normal he grabs my face and wipes off my tear streaked cheeks with so much love and care. I didn't realize until now that he really has been in love with me for a very long time, I was just too naïve to notice.
"You okay baby?" he asks with the term of endearment he knows brings me so much comfort. I don't let anyone but him call me that, it just feels so right hearing it coming from his lips, especially when he knows that I need him. I nod my head finally feeling a bit more grounded.
"Can I have some water?" I ask quietly. "Of course" he says and reaches around me to grab one of the bottles he had bought. "Thank you" I say after he hands it to me. He starts rubbing my back again while I gulp it down, suddenly feeling incredibly parched.
"How long has it been since you had one that bad?" he asks cautiously hoping it won't cause me to start spiraling again. "A while" I say looking down, knowing it's a lie, and he sees right through it.
"Baby please I wanna be there for you when things like this happen. You've gotta be honest with me or I won't know how to help you" I nod in acknowledgment. I can feel him reluctantly start to drop the subject but I know he doesn't want me to shut him out.
"I-it was last month" I say, clearing my throat to help me get it out. "Last month? Why didn't you tell me?" he asks gently. "You were hanging out with your college friends and I knew you were looking forward to it so I didn't want to bother you" I admit. "Luna if you really need me, especially for something like this you can always call me. You are my number one priority, you come first" he says holding onto my hand.
I look up making eye contact, knowing he truly means what he says. "Okay" is all I can say in response, giving him a sad smile.
"We should probably head out, it's getting pretty cold" he says, bringing his arms back in, rubbing his hands together in an effort to get warmer. "Do you think we could stay out here a bit longer? The stars look so beautiful right now" I ask, looking up at the sky feeling a bit better. He sees the change in my mood and realizes that I need this. "Let me get another blanket" he says showing his agreement. I nod my head and continue looking up, not sparing him a glance this time.
He comes back around after having rummaged through the car in search of some hand warmers as well. "You're so smart" I say catching the hand warmer and opening package shaking them to activate it. "I know" he replies, copying my cheekiness from earlier. I roll my eyes and toss one to him.
"Luna" he calls after me. "Huh?" I say looking back at him and I can't help but notice that he's wearing the kind of expression you would see someone make towards someone they truly love. "Come here" he says repeating his sentiment from not too long ago. I rush over to him, this time getting as close to him as I can after feeling a sudden breeze blowing past us.
"Jungkook" I say, "Yes baby?" he replies, looking down at me. "Thank you" I say, giving him a slight smile. "You're welcome" he says, mirroring my smile knowing that no more words need to be said. I feel myself starting to get lost in his eyes once again realizing that the most beautiful stars were in his eyes all along.
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Hi! I see a lot of screenshots and such from your blog for things like (I believe) Kamen Rider(?) I might be wrong please forgive me if so. I have always had a sort of vague interest in sentai media but never knew good hopping on points, do you have any personal recommendations for where an absolute beginner might jump in to watch shows like that?
if you're interested in tokusatsu, you can really start anywhere that looks cool or interesting to you! most seasons, aside from some anniversaries and the very rare sequel show, are pretty self-contained for the most part. diehard fans will make a big deal out of "good and bad starting points" but the truth is every show has been someone's first and hooked them on the genre, even the "bad" seasons (the poor quality of which is often exaggerated by fandom anyway) or the experimental entries not indicative of the wider franchise they're part of
but! if you want some real beginner friendly, you'll-probably-have-fun-with-this toku, my go-to recs for The Big Three™:
if you want to follow a team of heroes grow together as they fight evil in increasingly silly scenarios, super sentai's probably the series for you (and my favorite ^_^)
watch kiramager if you want a straightforward throwback to classic sentai. it's a back-to-basics season that gives you a good baseline of what sentai as a whole can be, while elevated enough by its stellar cast and infectious energy so as to never feel generic
shinkenger takes a more dramatic approach to the usual sentai formula, following a team of samurai recruited to serve under a lord who isn't telling them everything he knows. an incredibly stylish show that's almost sure to leave an impression
kamen rider began as a tragic hero, kidnapped by the villainous organization shocker and turned into a cyborg against his will, ultimately escaping and using his newfound abilities to put an end to their evil. since the original story, kamen rider has gone through a whole host of various different tones and storylines, arguably becoming the most versatile of the big franchises, though certain elements remain consistent like the near ever-present bug motif or our heroes using powers derived from evil for the sake of good
created in the wake of the 2011 tohoku earthquake disaster, kamen rider fourze was made with the goal to make children smile again, and that desire led to something really special. arguably The Power of Friendship™ show to end all others, and while its upbeat tone might not exactly be in line with Classic Kamen Rider™, it stands as a great entry point thanks to the passion behind it and its clear love for the genre
probably best experienced as blind as possible, kamen rider build is a rollercoaster of a series full of high stakes, mystery, intrigue, and Heated Drama Between Men™. if you want something more serialized that'll keep you on the edge of your seat throughout, build's one of the very best
i also wanna mention kamen rider gotchard, the currently airing series! we're only 8 episodes in at the time of this post, so you could catch up quick while still going through the backlog. very much a back-to-basics season, introducing pokemon-style creatures for our protagonists to catch in addition to the usual superheroics. it's been pretty cute so far :)
ultraman is a sci-fi series that typically follows a defense team created to defend the earth from aliens and kaiju, aided by the giant of light, ultraman. as opposed to the other two franchises where there's often a serial plot to follow and a centralized villain faction, ultra typically thrives with telling standalone sci-fi stories, usually aligning with a show's overarching theme and often compared to shows like star trek or the twilight zone, though recent seasons have been more willing to switch up the format
ultraman x is for anyone who's ever asked, "but... what if we could be friends with godzilla?" young XiO scientist daichi becomes bonded with the alien ultraman x and work together to protect the earth and fight for a future where humans, aliens, and kaiju can coexist. to me this is like, the platonic ideal of what ultraman is, and a perfect starting point because of it. also features several crossover episodes with past ultra seasons throughout the show, but it's all still very new-viewer friendly and could even entice you to check out some of those shows yourself!
ultraman orb, the 50th anniversary of the series, changes course by making the defense team a background component in favor of following amateur investigators and the mysterious, lone wanderer who's suddenly entered their lives (hint: he's ultraman). another iconic entry in the Heated Drama Between Men Cinematic Universe and a nice balance between ultra's classic status quo and a more modern ongoing narrative
i'd also be remiss not to mention the currently airing ultraman blazar, which i unfortunately have not been able to keep up with due to outside circumstances but have heard NOTHING but glowing praise for. it's simulcast on youtube every week with english subtitles AND an optional english dub!
pretty much all of these can be snagged over at nyaa(.)si, and x and orb can be watched legally over on tubitv(.)com!
#if you have any more questions feel free to ask!#anonymous#asks#kendrix morgan died for our sins#super sentai for ts#kamen rider for ts#ultraman for ts
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— CELEBRATING TWO YEARS OF LOVE.
let's pretend that i posted this on the real anniversary date (july 18th) and not a few weeks late ok. but i'm still shell shocked i honestly stayed around on here for this long, seeing as how i've been on this hellsite for over ten years maybe even longer, have left many blogs and sideblogs behind, but have stayed put on here for longer than it feels. even through all the craziness and friends gained and lost. i have not grown sick of this place and i know it's all because of my mutuals (and followers) aka the most beautiful, hilarious, talented souls anyone could ask to have on their side.
whether we are friends or have never spoken i love you, i adore you. thank you for making my time spent on here worth it even when times get tough and this little hobby of ours seems more like a stressful nine to five.
@deathmotif, @authurials, @theauthorvt, +annie — hey remember when we all met on wp and i started that silly little michael langdon gc on kik and it was a dozen of us in there but then it soon dwindled down to us five and kik was on the verge of imploding and we all moved over to snap and now we literally all talk every day, if not every other??! my day isn't complete without seeing one of you sending an unhinged video in the gc. IT'S BEEN SIX YEARS with you guys in my life and you know me better than anyone. i can tell you my darkest secrets, traumas, thoughts, and there's no judgment. it's literally the most healthy friend group ever. i'm forcing ya'll to dress up as barbie's for my bachelorette party, like you're stuck with me. barbie is serious. just as serious as my love is for each and every one of you. when i think about my life and future you guys are always in it. idk if we should thank cody fern or the antichrist or both. but whoever brought us together in this life i hope they do it in the next because life without y'all would suck.
@psychedelic-ink — you should already know how much i love you, but let me remind you, let me go on for ever and tell you how special you are to me ok. when i was balling my eyes out on the phone/discord you were there to listen to me be a blubbering mess, you were there to talk me down, to listen, to validate my feelings. when i need someone to be motivating and get shit done with me you're there. when i need to rant about something horny you're there to encourage the unhinged. our discord sleepovers are my favorite thing in the world. i'm still shocked when i think back to our casual messages on here turning into a friendship so close and tight that my man spent over $100 to send you a magazine (without question) because he knows how much you mean to me. you have my heart always!
@pedrito-friskito — i have the most vivid memory of me and sil talking about you on discord and how great you were and i was like um?? i wanna be friends with kay! so after we got off of the phone i messaged you and then before i knew it me, you, and sil were in a gc together and the rest is history. i love that you and i like to disappear without a word sometimes but always come back like lol sorry but here's this love and support and encouragement and let me just life update you but also make you horny with this thought, and sil just puts up with us and i love it. ily. i'm forever forcing you to write and publish every story you write because you're going to put sjm to shame with the beauty your brain comes up with.
@tom-whore-dleston — i know i'm the worst at replying but you never make me feel bad for it. you're like 'oh yeah her adhd brain will get back to this text in 2 to 3 business weeks it's ok', and i love you for it. but no seriously ily so much. you're the first person i think of when all i can think about is dick because i know you're thinking the same thing. i know you'll understand. every time i see you post on social media i'm like wtf?? why am i halfway across the states and not with the loml right now?? it's truly unfair because i know if we were together we'd be the most chaotic, loud, sluttiest duo ever. your talent always amazes me, your beauty makes me jealous. both of our partners better watch out because i'ma run away with you one day i swear!
@chaseadrian — the fact that we grew close in a fandom that i despise now and is more toxic than not and a beautiful friendship came out of it?? iconic. every time i think about you all i can think is 'they just seems like they have everything all together, their ideas, their graphics, their mind, the way they speak is like talking to that really cool english teacher' like lmao i cannot explain how much i want your vibe. i adore your vibe. i ADORE YOU.
@greenorangevioletgrass — as one of my first friends on this little blog of mine i feel like i need to do more than put into words how much i adore you, how grateful i am to call you a friend, to be a part of your presence on here. hearing your ideas, your living breathing fic-like life is serotonin to me. like please share in the sexy wealth bestie!
@sapphireplums — when i see you in my inbox i literally get this overjoyed feeling inside me like charity thought about me today?? took time out of her day to send me something?? i'm blessed. i hope you and your beautiful mind are thriving bestie because you're literally one of the nicest, softest, people i've met on here and i'm in your corner if you ever need me. to show you love and support. to continue to convince you that your themes will always be more superior than mine!!
@rae-gar-targaryen — if success and talent and beautiful prose (and face) was an olympic sport you would have won by now. you HAVE won. we may not talk as much as we used to but just know that i always am thinking about how you are, waiting patiently for you to bless us with more of your fics (even if it's a crumb i'm like a little mouse savoring it because hello?? emily henry who? she got nothing on you). as my lawyer i love knowing if i needed you you'd be there with a simple text, as my bestie, as someone i look up to, as someone who radiates elegance and something else i can't even put into words because that's literally how you leave me, speechless: never change and know i'm always here for you.
@allaboardthereadingrailroad, @littledemondani, @wroteclassicaly — the three of you were those 'big' accounts that always intimated me. i stood in the background reading your stuff and being like ok they're going to put me out of business and then being absolutely shook when you followed me, i felt like i made it. like this was what being on here was all about having the accounts you find the most talented and amazing, and who have wrote some of your fav fics, follow you. and we may not talk a lot but i cherish you guys so so very much. like even before i made this account, on my old accounts, i've always been your #1 fans!!
@kittyofalltrades, @namorwife, @yoditopascal — i may have all but died out and disappeared from the discord server, and we may not talk anymore, but some of my best memories are with you guys. the unhinged, the thirst, the games, the rantings, i've never been more entertained and chaotic and rowdy than i was with ya'll and i love it. i miss it. ya'll are still my favorite people, my loves, my besties. one day i will be horny over the same characters as ya'll again and you'll be annoyed with my thirst again.
@eupheme, @tripleyeeet, @wint3r-h3art, @ohcaptains, @celestianstars, @flordeamatista — if there were ever a group of beautiful people i constantly compare myself to because the way they write, the way their themes look, the way their fic layouts / set ups look, their graphics, their vibes, their talent, their so many damn things: it would be ya'll. like i'm constantly like how do i get on their level? like i know there's not levels on here and everyone is so uniquely special and amazing at what they write and do and make, but i'm always in the trenches of devoting and heart eyes over EVERYTHING ya'll post. ya'll are the cool art kids i want to hangout with but instead i'm screaming in cheer in the silent museum where your creations should be showcased.
@mothdruid, @moonlight-prose, @moondirti, @angrythingstarlight, @amywritesthings, @oncasette, @withahappyrefrain, @navybrat817, @bakerstreethound, @villenelle, @refined-by-fire, @ladylannisterxo, @emerald-chaos, @mxgyver, @foli-vora, @jettia, @moreofem, @bits-and-babs, @woodlandmouth, @fluffyprettykitty, @cocoamoonmalfoy, @galatially, @ladylannisterxo, @saintlike78, @buckys-estrella, @ghostlyfleur, @arctvrvs — through the two years of me being on here i have had the pleasure, the joy, of talking to each of you. whether that be screaming in asks, inboxs, discords, pms, where we were hyping each other up, sharing ideas, support, check ups, screaming over each others fics, whatever it may be. there has been love and support and every time i see ya'll in my notfis, reading my stuff, your thirst posts or rant posts or your rbs, i'm always grateful to see it. for it. to be a part of it. but most importantly i'm like: hello why are we not closer?? why do i not bombard them with my love?? annoy them with it so much so that they have no choice but to be my bestie and feel all the doormat love and support that i'm constantly feeling when i see their little icons and usernames. so this is me both saying i adore you, ily, we may not talk as much as i wished but i'm here supporting and loving everything you do and beware that i will annoy you with my love when you least expect it and soon you'll be wishing for me to get out of your pms. you have a friend in me, a supporter, a hyper, seriously i got lucky with y'all being my mutuals <3.
there's so many other babes that i'm missing but tumblr has a tag limit so i couldn't get everyone on this list but just know ily ily literally every single one of my mutuals is a gift from god to me. you put up with my posts and insanity, i have no choice but to give ya'll my whole ass heart!!!!
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Excerpts:
For two seasons and a TV movie, creator Michael Lannan and director Andrew Haigh (who was just coming off his breakthrough film Weekend and was years away from the award-winning 45 Years and All of Us Strangers) led the show’s cast and crew in crafting a new kind of gay TV show—raw, relaxed, character-driven and intimate. It didn’t fully work—in the end, Looking was cancelled due to low ratings—but a decade away from the show’s premiere, it’s clear that the show’s legacy lives on.
Onscreen, the cast of Looking—including stars-to-be like Jonathan Groff and Murray Bartlett—played characters who were working to find themselves while creating a chosen family with each other. Offscreen, the actors were doing the same thing, reckoning with their own identities and finding family in each other.
For the lead role of Patrick, the production looked at Jonathan Groff, the Tony-nominated Broadway star of Spring Awakening, who’d recently made the jump to TV with a splashy role on Ryan Murphy’s hit musical series Glee.
Haigh: I actually quite liked Glee. I thought it was a good show, but I wasn't sure he was going to be right. Then he came in, and I'm like, “Yeah, you're great for this.”
Sarah Condon (executive producer): Jonathan just had all these qualities of vulnerability and also an amazing ability, which to me is very similar in some ways to Sarah Jessica Parker, of doing the comedy and drama together—not a lot of actors actually, can do both so well and flip back and forth between. He is one of those people.
Jonathan Groff (Patrick): I came out of the closet later—I came out publicly at 23, came out to my parents that same year too. I was out but I was, in a big way, not fully accepting myself. I came out of the closet because it felt more painful to be in than out at that point, but I didn't really feel myself own who I was until I had had the experience of Looking.
I remember auditioning for the show, and feeling heat on my skin during the audition. It was the scene with Patrick and Richie on the train, doing this flirtatious scene, and I remember my skin feeling hot, and it feeling scary and exciting at the same time. I felt raw and exposed in a way that I had never felt before. So there was a real vulnerability in that, that made me feel nervous and excited.
Carmen Cuba (casting director): Jonathan Groff was out, but he hadn't played a gay character before. And more than anyone, he was the most experienced on the show, even Andrew. So he definitely must have understood more than any of us, the fact that playing the role is one thing but he was then going to be in press talking about it. It's a different thing you're agreeing to, I assume.
Groff: I remember Murray, Frankie, and I showing up to San Francisco during pre-production in March of 2013—I mean, this is 10 years ago. I remember the month. I remember Murray making us dinner, and me and Frankie going over there, and smoking weed and smelling the jasmine in the backyard of Murray's sublet that he had gotten. I remember Frankie was freaking out, because he had graduated from Juilliard and is this brilliant actor, but had never done anything on screen before, and so we were talking about that. I mean, just immediately, we knew we had to have this believable friendship in order for the show to work. And so we just started hanging out and we never stopped.
Groff quickly developed chemistry with Castillo, one of his onscreen love interests. While Castillo’s Richie was initially meant to be a minor character, the team later made the decision to make him part of the main cast.
Castillo: I remember standing on the platform in between takes with Jonathan [for our first scene together]. I remember our chemistry was developing and we were hitting it off, and I didn't want to ruin that but I also wanted to open up to him and be honest with him. I decided to tell him the story about meeting my now-wife, who at the time was my girlfriend. When she and I had met, there was an undeniable chemistry between us, like the minute we laid eyes on each other, it was just like there was this attraction. We were the only two people in the room in a room full of people. I wanted to tell Jonathan that story because I was relating it to Patrick and Richie meeting.
I was revealing to him that I was straight and he didn't bat a lash. He took it in, he listened and yeah, it was funny, because it was almost like a coming out.
Groff: I knew that he was straight, because I had asked our director or costume designer. I had gotten the intel already. It wasn't a shock. “That guy's cute. Is he gay?” [Laughs]
Condon: I mean, it sounds silly, in a way, but they were brave decisions. I remember having to have that conversation with Jonathan. “Are you up for this?” There were a lot of those kind of conversations. And Jonathan was so game, as was the whole cast.
Groff: I remember the premiere was at The Castro, and I remember feeling like I was in a fairy tale. The Castro, the audience is lit as fuck, and it's a lot of gays. They are there to celebrate, which is just such a special, unique energy at a premiere of any sort.
Michael Lombardo and Richard Plepler were running HBO at that time. I remember being at that premiere and Michael was standing there, talking about, “This is the first exclusively gay show we've ever had on our network.” It felt like, “Oh my God— we're in this. We're a part of this moment in history.” It felt like more than a TV show. It felt like a big deal when he would say that.
Despite its mixed initial reception and its relative underperformance, the show made stars out of the main cast—especially Jonathan Groff.
Groff: Between the first and second season in New York, they had asked me to be the grand marshal of the Gay Pride Parade—because of the TV show, and because I'm a New Yorker and had done a lot of theater. I felt scared to do it. I said yes, because my head and my heart were telling me that I wanted to do it, but there was a huge part of me that felt incredibly fearful, incredibly insecure, and incredibly scared. I did it anyway, and that was also a ring of fire moment. Doing the Gay Pride parade, being on the front, waving at people, and being so visibly out—it was just a constant experience of being, in a great way, pushed outside of my comfort zone.
Alvarez: He was coming off of this breakup and he's meeting somebody new and he's encountering all these feelings of being out in public and what his image represents to other people. And so you're swirling with all these other things, and also you're like, just a man trying to love other men.
Groff: I remember, oh my God, talking about douching [in a scene on the show], and I had never really douched before, as myself. Frankie Alvarez came with me. What we did in the show, where we go to the Walgreens? We actually did [that] in the West Village in real life, where he walked with me to get a fucking anal douche, and also a dildo to experiment with. He was in the gay sex shop with me, doing that in real life.
Alvarez: It was a moment of vulnerability, where he wanted to go dildo shopping, but he didn't want to be alone. He could have called any number of his gay friends, but he called me. And it was a testament to our friendship that he trusted me, that even though I was straight, he understood that he had a supportive friend there through that time. I was Doris.
As the series continued, the team looked to their cast for inspiration, sometimes borrowing elements of their personal lives and using them in storylines.
Groff: I remember sitting in a diner in San Francisco with Andrew and talking him through my most recent breakup as he was writing the big, final episode of season two and the fight between Kevin and Patrick—literally, me recounting and him writing down things that I said, that we said to each other, to get that in there. Everybody was offering up their own stories the whole time. It was incredible.
Weedman: The one thing I remember was, before we did the scene where I go see my dad's dead body, the three of us were sitting in this real funeral home and we're just talking about different times in our lives we'd seen a dead body and what that's like. I had just seen my friend Christopher's body and Jonathan had been through Cory Monteith’s [death]. We were telling all these stories that were just very intense.
And then I remember after we shot the scene, that Murray came to my trailer and just walked in, and we both just cried and cried and cried. And that's pretty rare, that actors aren't just on the phone, working out their next job, figuring out how they're going to renovate their house, how they're going to spend their money—they're not jerking off their ego in some way or some kind of “building their empire.” That wasn't going on—these were just sensitive boys.
In the aftermath of Looking, the cast and crew found themselves permanently changed. The experience of making the series affected everything, from their career decisions to their everyday lives.
Groff: It brought me out of my own skin in a way that I don’t know if I would’ve otherwise. And every set I walked onto after that, every rehearsal room I walked onto after that, I didn't feel insecure about my sexuality. Looking and the experience of being on that set with all those people was so liberating, and really, truly life-changing.
Condon: We've done about a yearly reunion.
Bartlett: Raul got married last year and a bunch of us were able to go—it was sort of a Looking reunion really. It was like, “Oh my God, this is our 10-year reunion.” And it was about Raul's wedding, but it was also a bunch of old friends getting back together and a lot of us from Looking days.
Castillo: Jonathan married [my wife and I] this summer so it's like a full circle.
Groff: That girl that he was talking about [while shooting the pilot] ended up being his wife.
Ten years later, many of the actors who starred in Looking have become bonafide stars. Jonathan Groff has appeared in generational projects on stage and screen, from Hamilton to Mindhunter to Frozen. Russell Tovey has appeared in shows like Quantico, American Horror Story: NYC and the upcoming Feud: Capote Vs. the Swans. O.T. Fagbenle, who had a minor role in season one as Agustin’s boyfriend, has gone on to do shows like The Handmaid’s Tale and appeared in the blockbuster Black Widow. And of course Murray Bartlett continues to be a staple of prestige TV, starring in The Last of Us and The White Lotus, which he won an Emmy for.
Groff: Even if the show didn't hit the way that we all wish it would have, it still affected people, including us, and it looks like that is the art that stays. I mean, I'm on Merrily We Roll Along right now. Forty-two years ago, it was a Broadway flop, and it's such an extraordinary show. People are finally, including me, getting to experience it for the brilliant thing that it is. And so that's encouraging, moving forward, that even though it might not be celebrated in the moment [it might have a moment later on].
Groff: I mean, ultimately, not enough people watched it, and we went off the air—that's just the story of what happened with the show. But the fact that it only lasted for two seasons and a movie, and 10 years later, we're still talking about it, there's something about the staying power of the show, and the people that continue, a decade later, to talk about the impact that it has had on them. It sort of helps heal those wounds of feeling rejected.
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So Puyo Puyo Puzzle Pop is out and I see a lot of theories going around… This is half a self-indulgent post for me and half a poorly thrown together essay reviewing Sig and Aya's and the blue soul and the crimson soul's, relationship to each other. because boy is it a bit of a complex web. @_@
Some people were talking about their relationship today in EPPC, and I'm bad at talking to people, so I decided to put my thoughts in a post + touch on some misconceptions (I guess?) around since the game just came out and it relies on knowing information presented in extra material like the audio dramas and the (sega) novels.
And of course, spoilers for the first 4 main routes of Puzzle Pop.
some quick bullet points before I start… you can skip this if youre fairly familiar with fever 2, tetris 2, and the novels
is Aya possessing Sig?!
how did Sig's power get unleashed by Meena? are they super ultra powerful??
no, Aya is clearly still imprisoned safely contained in the tome of sealing, so it probably isn't behind this. We also know in Lidelle's route that it and Klug were having some kind of argument after he ran into Sig.
Well, in the game, Lemres establishes that Meena normally is not that powerful… Rather, it's been a bit implied over the course of the games that his powers have been growing stronger, so I think that it's more that Meena broke down a dam that was already barely holding itself together… a brief timeline…
Puyo Puyo Fever 2 - Sig transfers to Primp Magic School and his hand suddenly turns red. This can presumably be linked to his proximity to the tome of sealing. Akuma attempts to prevent further resonation by using the Ito Hairito enchantment. Attempts at "curing" his hand are touched on in Puyo Puyo! 15th Anniversary
Sig's Secret happens a bit before Puyo Puyo!! 20th Anniversary, and he has the incident of his powers being awakened by Witch's potion. This is the first time we actually see the "Demon part" of him take over, and it turned both of his eyes red when this happened. (src)
Puyo Puyo Tetris 2 - Sig and Klug are protected by a certain power from being influenced by Marle when she's causing mayhem in Primp Town. The crimson spirit was potentially protecting Klug in this situation, but what about Sig? I theorize that his own demon powers, which have been growing stronger, actually protected him as well. (Lemres' substory, PPT2)
Puyo Puyo Puzzle Pop - Sig befriends Meena and offers to share some of his power. This seems to open the floodgates and allow the demon parts of him to take over.
fun fact: The words for "arm" and "hand" are the same in Japanese, so a lot of fans were actually surprised when they saw that his entire arm is red and not just his hand when his art in 20th came out.
Now, with those bullet points out of the way… the meat of this post is focusing more on Sig and Aya/Strange Klug/Possessed Klug/Crimson Spirit/Whatever name you want to call its relationship.
I think most people take the text in the games at face value, though the editing choices in translation don't really help I guess...the first instance of "red power" being translated as "evil power" will never be forgiven, but it's okay since Lemres and Schezo get it right--. I see a lot of people think that Aya is somehow influencing Sig in this story, but it has been established that Sig has the potential to tap into the full power that Aya probably wants access back to in Sig's Secret when Witch's power potion spills on him.
Back then, Sig and Amitie's friendship, and really any of his friendships, weren't very well-defined. However, she was able to bring him back by reminding him of their friendship...
Hey, Sig! …Let’s go back to café prep, alright!? I mean, Raffina’s gonna be super mad if you don’t show up! And then Klug’s gonna go all sarcastic on you again! Do you want that!? And, and, we haven’t even figured out what to put on the menu for our Special yet! If you really want me to, I’ll let you put whipped cream, for real!”
I just kept screaming one thing after another as it came to me. Please, please, please… Please, let Sig hear my voice!
“Please, come back to us! I promise, we all love you, so, so much! And I know, I know that deep inside, you really, really want to stay with us, too…!”
(src)
He manages to regain control of himself though clearly Amitie reminding him of everything isn't working in Puzzle Pop.
I kind of resummarized the climax of Sig's Secret because it felt important to contextualize his behavior, how its different in Puzzle Pop, and how people tend to conclude that "he must be possessed by Aya" as the first thought in Puzzle Pop. I also did this, though it was because I watched the routes out of order (lol). The behavior of this not!Sig is reckless, power-hungry, very very very gloating (just read the novel), and doesn't see any importance in friendships when it comes to Amitie and Meena (Lemres' route in Puzzle Pop). Meanwhile Aya, who has a very clear outlined goal of getting Sig back is…generally levelheaded, calm, and although angry about its situation, doesn't always charge straight for Sig whenever it's unsealed ("Amitie and Lidelle's Primp Tour", Puyo Puyo!! Quest story mode, etc.) So I think the binary the game presents of Aya being "evil" and Sig being "not evil" is not necessarily true considering how unreliable the narration of the "tome of sealing" is. I find it more accurate to say that they're power/impulse and control/logic, or you could argue they're a conscious and an unconscious.
I theorize that a piece of their original power lies dormant in Sig, and it is this power that Aya specifically wants back because it's…pretty powerless in its current form. This power, possibly the "crimson power", drives the "blue soul" in Sig a bit power hungry when its unleashed, and it has no conscious to control it because the "crimson soul" isn't in the vessel. I also think Sig and the "blue soul" are separate entities to an extent.
“Stop talking… Be quiet, just shut up! Gh… With every word you say, the voice in my head, it…GAAAAHHHH…!”
“A voice, in your head? T-That’s gotta be Sig! Hey!! Sig!! If you can hear me, say something!”
(src)
The best comparison I have to this situation is Cinderpelt's reincarnation into Cinderheart in the book series Warriors. Cinderheart inherited Cinderpelt's soul after the latter's death, but because Cinderheart's grown to have her own experiences and is a separate entity while Cinderpelt lay dormant in their mind, they will separate in death. I think this "copilot"-ish situation is the case with Sig and it's why they're vying for control a second time in Puyo Puyo Puzzle Pop.
I think that's why not!Sig is so "evil" and also gives people the impression that it might be Aya -- considering I also thought this -- though it's probably not the case since this story follows a similar formula to Sig's Secret with some tweaks to reflect a lot of subtle character growth, which is the subject of the next section.
Now, people might ask…why aren't Sig's eyes red and his hair dark like they were in Sig's Secret? Well, I think this is due to texture limitations for one, but I also think this is a sign of Sig's personal identity growing stronger over the course of the games. He has relationships he wants to hold onto, his own experiences, his own life, so he wouldn't just easily give up control of his physical vessel, even if he hasn't been speaking as himself in Puzzle Pop so far… This story's already done a lot with establishing Sig as a character and the importance of his relationship with Amitie, and he hasn't even actually spoken, which I find impressive. I also just like that all this stuff is only clear if you pay attention to the steady build up of the stories from the past few years… well, they were just breadcrumbs, I guess...Listen I've been following this plotline for 7-8 years and its been in the works for like 13? So you have to forgive me for feeling happy about having all the pieces of the puzzle.
As for what this means for the role Aya/the crimson spirit will play in the story… I'm not sure. I honestly don't expect it to appear at all since all the models/animations are recycled from Puyo Puyo Chronicle with some touch ups save for Meena. It has been referenced though, and the profiles in-game go in-depth on who it was and is, but I can't say if it'll actually make a fully story appearance…Especially since Klug was relegated to a side story role. Which is fine, I don't really care despite my URL. it was a good story. I do however expect this story to shed a lot of light on the relationship between the Sig, blue soul, and the crimson soul once its complete. I haven't even touched on my personal interpretation of Amitie and her hat, so maybe I'll make another post about that in the future? I think her situation is meant to parallel Sig's, but I'll save that for another time if people are interested...
As usual some of this is my interpretation, but everything I sourced is real and true and I'd never lie to you, etc.
Misc. Fun Stuff
These were things I liked about Aya and Sig's imagery/motifs but I wasn't able to fit into the post concisely.
not!Sig uses the same pronouns as Aya, 我 (wa) and お前 (omae), though they're written in hiragana as opposed to Aya's kanji. This is actually why I thought he was possessed because I walked into a stream in the middle of Ringo's route, haha.
My theory of Aya and Sig being a conscious and an unconscious are actually inspired by one of Aya's spells anima. Now in Latin this really just means "soul" which is fine, but in Jungian psychology the anima and animus are a dualistic archetype…which is cool, though this would potentially mean the crimson spirit is the unconscious part, haha! Technically they'd align more with Freud's concept of an id and a superego as I explained them, but I always like pointing out the possible Jungian reading of Aya's spell Yes, I realize I'm grasping for straws
#ramblings#puyo puyo#anywya feel free to send e lovemail for this . or hatemail if that's more your style#pypy lore
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𝘖𝘣𝘴𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘷𝘴 𝘓𝘰𝘷𝘦 - 𝘐
I'd Rather Not
Word Count: 2.6k Words
Warnings: Cussing, Terrible Humor, Reader is a player, Shuri has a staring problem
Y/N L/N has built her reputation amongst the students and teachers. Teachers knew her as a young lady with a bright future, while the students knew her as the school's fuck girl and dealer.
Yesterday marked the third year since she left her kingdom, and she still hadn't gone to visit. Three years since she last spoke to her grandparents, three years since she'd seen her sister, Nuru. Today was the anniversary of her and her roommate's friendship.
Riri Williams is a young woman busying herself with small and big projects. She got into MIT with a scholarship granted by the late Ironman, who paid for her books, dorm, tuition, and everything.
"Happy Anniversary," Riri hums and flops onto the floor next to Y/N. She took pride in knowing everything about Y/N, like her real name, where she was from, and more. She even knew about how her parents died and when she lost her virginity. They developed a pattern of Y/N doing random things at odd hours of the night and Riri attempting to stop her. Like yesterday, Y/N drove to glue chicken nuggets to her least favorite teacher's desk.
"We sound like a couple," Y/N scoffs as she lifts her body onto her bed, dragging Riri with her. They sit with their backs against the wall and a laptop playing Scooby Doo in front of them. Her eyelids are heavy, and she feels like she's floating.
"We ain't ever gon date, said so yourself," The shorter girl denies, leaning into her friend's side as she remembered when Y/N turned her down. Y/N told her she would never date her, not because she wasn't attractive, but because it wasn't in her nature to date. She never fully dated anyone, only sneaky links.
"That don't stop you from liking me," Y/N chuckles as she shifts the two to lie down.
"Go to sleep, T."
The first three classes were easy minus random girls coming up asking for a quick meet or boys asking when Y/N would swing both ways. As usual, she turned the heads of both students and teachers, men and women. Y/N knew she was pretty, had since she was six after she batted her eyelashes at the cook so he'd give her two cookies instead of one.
It didn't help that she carried herself with masculine confidence, or at least that's what Riri said.
"It's something about a masculine woman with confidence that just butters our biscuits," She chuckled, her lips pursed as she tried to stop the smile from showing.
"Never say that shit again," Y/N deadpanned.
"I gotta stop hanging with Kayla."
She had one more class today, then she could sleep, but before that, she needed to get her textbook. The teacher, Mr. John, was her least favorite teacher of all. He was your stereotypical creepy teacher. Telling girls off for showing skin, giving remarks that made girls giggle uncomfortably, and he always seemed to be looking at the girls' legs.
It took eight minutes for Y/N to get to her dorm. She was stopped by a group of boys paying her for supplying their party and two girls throwing compliments at her.
Though the dorm was also Y/N's, she still knocked on the door. It felt wrong to barge in. It was like your sibling barging into your room, and then leaving the door open.
"Ri," She knocks twice, pressing her ear against the door. "I left my textbook, and Mr. John is on my ass. Can I come in?"
"Took me a couple of months, but I had my friend- Did we piss off Wakanda?"
"Not just us, this place is no longer-"
Knocking on the door interrupts Shuri, and the two glance between the door and each other.
"Ri, I left my textbook, and Mr. John is on my ass. Can I come in?"
"Just tell me where it is," Riri shouted, shoving past the shocked princess and looking around for the thick book. She hears Shuri asking her who it was, she ignores it in favor of stopping the door from opening.
"You got somebody over or something?" The person whispers, her filed fingernails poking over Riri's head to wave into the room.
"Just tell me where it is and I'll-WOAH!" Riri stumbles back, barely avoiding being hit by the door as it swings open.
Shuri and Y/N stared at each other before the woman glared at her while reaching back to slam the door shut. "Who is this woman?!"
"Why didn't you stay outside?!" Riri shouts back, running around the two to grab her bag.
"Why is she here?!" Y/N interjected, following after Riri as she waved her hand towards Shuri, narrowly avoiding her face. Riri sighed, she should've known her roommate would come back soon.
Her eyes widen in realization before spinning back to point between the two women, "She helped me build it! Why you ain't here for her?"
"Build what?" Y/N demanded, twisting so she could look between the two. Shuri tilted her head, her eyes trailing the taller woman's figure before shaking her head clear of any thoughts.
"Ms. Willams built a vibranium detector. Did you help her?"
"I did a little razzle-dazzle," She admitted, scratching her head as she looked to the side. Riri shouted at her, reaching over to smack the woman's arm.
"Razzle dazzle, my ass! You helped me find parts and made corrections," She corrected, using her fingers to list each task. "You used that thing from your alarm clock to make it work."
"Will you shut the hell up?!"
"I need you to pack your things and come with me right now," Shuri demanded, glancing between the two.
"I have class in like fifteen minutes, and Y/N's late for hers," Riri protested as she shared a look with her roommate. Flinching at the glare Shuri gave her, Riri sighed as she looked around the room.
"Ok, just let me go to the bathroom real quick," Riri said as she crept around the princess who watched Y/N. Faintly she hears her roommate mumble, 'Why is she staring like that?' Halfway through the door, she looked up and cursed, "Shit!"
She ran to the corner of the room, glaring at the bald black woman who entered from the bathroom.
"I had it under control," Shuri insisted, slightly irritated. Okoye shrugged, her eyes never straying from Riri, "You asked for five minutes, I gave you six."
Riri watched as both of them crept towards her, and Y/N stepped in front of her. Shuri held her hand out, "Calm down." She pleaded.
"Get out," Riri demanded as she waved her hands towards the door, peeking around Y/N's arm. "Get out of our dorm."
The shorter girl looked around for something and settled for the speaker on the desk. She snatched it and held it in her arms, ready to throw it. "I swear, you better not take another step towards us."
"Mmph see how they teach the children here to treat their guests," Okoye said to Shuri in mock disappointment. Riri took the opportunity to shove her roommate and heave the speaker towards them. Okoye whipped her hand out, and a small metal rod extended into a full spear, slicing the speaker in half.
Shuri and Riri's mouths dropped open in shock at the action, "You brought a spear in here?!"
"I like her," Okoye chuckled. She grunted when Y/N threw a pillow at her, and she shouted, "We don't like you, this is a completely one-sided relationship!"
A breathy chuckle to her left drew Okoye's attention from the panicking duo and toward Shuri, whose eyes were still on Y/N. Riri lifted a heater over her head as the general stepped forward and grinned at them, "You small small girl, you can either come to Wakanda with your giant friend, conscious or unconscious."
"You need to be conscious of the way that you look, walking 'round here all that ash on your head," Riri sassed, glaring at the offended woman.
"Since the ash has been acknowledged, I'm offering you help," Y/N grinned, stepping around Riri to grab a small bottle of oil. She spun back toward the glaring woman with a smile and presented the bottle, "Use this hair oil to get rid of the rolling in baby powder look."
Shuri laughed as she leaned forward slightly before she stood straight to avoid Okoye's glare. "That's funny?"
"No, no it's not," she answered, trying to control her laugh.
"Mhm, I told you," she said, hitting Shuri's arm. The princess smiled in assurance, "You look good."
"Now, wait a minute," Y/N shouted, stepping and glancing between the two. "You knew she was walking round here looking like that?"
"She knew!" Okoye shouted, pointing at Shuri over Y/N's shoulder. The two shared a chuckle at the general's obvious distress. "Sweetheart, that is just foul."
"Riri!" Y/N started, quickly spinning to the startled girl. "If you ever do that to me, I will shave you bald and put baby powder on your head, so you twinning with black Caillou over here."
"Who is this Caillou?" Okoye scoffed, looking over at Shuri, who shrugged.
"It don't matter, we not going," Riri chuckled, adjusting the heater when Okoye went to step forward.
"You know what?" Shuri began, stepping back to grin at Okoye, "Let's leave them here and let them deal with the merman with winged ankles, who wants to kill them, alone."
"You're right," Okoye nodded as the pair walked towards the door. Just before they opened it, Shuri turned back with a grin and danced, "You got this."
"Mhm, with your heater," Okoye grumbled.
"Hell no," Y/N groaned, shuffling around before running around to pack her things.
"T, what're you doing?" Riri asked, watching the girl put folded clothes into a bag. She spun around to glare at Riri and waved her arms at Shuri, "Did you not just hear what she just said?"
After a moment, Riri sighed and went to pack her bag, "We'll need to stop by the workshop, all our projects are there."
They walked towards the car with Okoye in front of them and Shuri behind them. A girl walking past grinned at the group, "Hey, Y/N, you got a new toy for yourself?"
Shuri raised a brow but continued to walk. She could hear another person running up to them. "Y/N, wait!"
They paused right at the car and turned to look at the approaching woman. She was average height with braids in a bun. Y/N rolled her eyes with a huff as the girl reached up to hug her. Her hands stayed in her pockets as she leaned down slightly for her, "What's wrong now, Nat?"
"Just wondering where ya going?" Nature pouted, huffing when the taller girl shoved her away.
"Not like it matters, 'cause we ain't together, I'm working," Y/N murmured, scratching her neck as she glanced at the group behind her.
Okoye was checking something on her beads while Riri was staring at the pair. Shuri seemed to be glaring at the two of them, looking away when she caught Y/N's eye.
"Who is that?" She whispered, staring at the pair out the corner of her eye. Riri sighed as she shook her head, "One of her crazy ex flings, she got tired of the girl following her around and getting jealous. They ain't fucking no more, but Nature has a bad habit of telling everyone she's dating her."
Noticing the way Shuri's jaw clenched, she quickly spoke, "They never were and still aren't."
"Ready to go, sweetheart?"
An arm wrapped around Shuri's shoulders and pulled her into Y/N's side. She could see Nature glaring at her over her shoulder and grinned. Wrapping her arm around Y/N's waist, Shuri snickered, "Of course, Sthandwa."
Y/N smiled to herself and opened the door to let Shuri in. "This is the passenger side," Shuri argued as Riri and Okoye got in the back.
"Do you know where the garage is?" Y/N asked, lifting Shuri into the car and closing the door after checking she was in her seat correctly.
Tags: @kgao
STORY MASTERLIST | NEXT PART
#imaginewrites: obsession vs love#shuri x black!reader#shuri x reader#shuri imagine#shuri x you#shuri x woc!reader#shuri udaku x reader#shuri udaku fluff#shuri udaku imagine#shuri fluff#shuri fanfiction#shuri fic#reader insert#princess shuri x reader#shuri angst#shuri udaku x yn#letitia wright x reader#shuri x y/n#black panther x reader
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Title: Kissing Under The Mistletoe.
Pairing: Jennie x You. [GxG]
Warning: None.
Words: 1014.
Disclaimer: I wish everyone a happy Christmas and holiday time. Take care of yourself and stay hydrated. I know how lonely and hard Christmas time can be on some people. I want all of you to know that you are loved by me and more than good enough. If you don’t celebrate Christmas I wish you a good day/night. I wish health and happiness for all the readers of my Fan-Fiction blog. I appreciate, adore and love each reader. Especially the loyal ones. My blog is always open for a message I will try to reply as fast as I can to be there for each one of you. 🥺💕
Jennie Kim absolutely loved Christmas and the whole Christmas time since you came into her life unexpectedly. She thanked heaven everyday for you. You've been together since 6 years and friends since 8 years. You've been by her side since two of her trainee years and 6 K-Pop Idol years.
Being proud is a understatement. You couldn't express in words how proud you are of Jennie. It's now your 8 Christmas that you both spent together. Right now you were in Jennie's house with your girlfriend and her three bandmates also best friends. You laughed when Lisa put Christmas decorations the wrong way or when Jisoo got flour on her face by your girlfriend.
You helped Chaeyoung to put up one of the many little Christmas tree's that Jennie has. Chaeyoung hummed Santa Baby by Ariana Grande. Jennie checked on you a few moments later. She kissed your cheek and puffed out her dumpling cheeks.
You pouts when she missed the place where you wanted her to kiss the most. She chuckled and kissed you on the lips passionately. You kissed back and smiled into the kiss. Jennie caressed your cheeks and sat down on your lap with her back at your front. You gave her one last kiss on her adorable dumpling cheeks.
Jennie helped you to decorate the Christmas tree's with you giving her the christmas balls. Sometimes you would steal kisses from each other or attack each other's face with kisses. Jisoo sat down next at Chaeyoung and Lisa to help with the Christmas tree's. Jennie giggled a lot which caused the corner of her bandmates eyes to crinkled with a smile.
They adored and admired you for making their best friend feeling so happy with your existence. Chaeyoung already told everyone that she wishes to have a relationship like you and Jennie have in the future. Your love for each other made her best friends believe in love. Even if Jisoo thought that love is only chemistry and not real. She knows now that love is real if you find the right partner.
„You know Christmas is very special since it's our eight Christmas together. I am very grateful that you entered my life so unexpected eight years ago. You gave me love and adoration. Which I will always cherish and try to give back as much as you give to me." State Jennie with happiness in her voice. Emotional happy tears rolled down her dumpling cheeks. Which caused Chaeyoung and Lisa to cry as well. Jisoo chuckled trying to hold back tears.
You pulled Jennie, Chaeyoung, Lisa and Jisoo in a group hug. You have a deep connected friendship with Jennie and her bandmates.
„I can't believe we've been K-Pop Idols since almost seven years. Next year is Blackpink's seventh anniversary. We have been training as trainees so hard for our dreams. I am very proud of us. I am proud of Y/N for coming into our lives so unexpectedly. She changed our lives for better with her down-to-earth personality. I am proud of our deep connected friendship and Jennie's relationship with Y/N. You both deserve each other, you are the perfect match and perfect for each other." State Jisoo with proudness and much emotions in her voice. You, Jennie, Lisa and Chaeyoung kissed her cheeks.
Without realizing Lisa walked away to get a mistletoe. Since she wanted you and Jennie to kiss under a mistletoe to take a picture of this moment. Jennie turned on your lap to face you with a happy expression on her face. Her brown eyes sparkled in the light to a beautiful honey-brown color. It reminded you of honey. Your cheeks flushed red in a blush when you noticed Jennie's deep intense staring in your eyes.
Her bandmates giggled when they saw Lisa standing behind you and Jennie with a mistletoe in her hand. You and Jennie looked up with a happy expression on your face.
„Yay we need to kiss each other now." Mumbled Jennie with excitement in her voice. Her mouth were so close to yours that you feel her breath on your lips.
You didn't hesitate to wrap your arms around her neck and Jennie didn't hesitate to caressing your cheeks with her thumbs. You both kiss each other a few seconds later passionately with many feelings. Chaeyoung and Jisoo hugged each other with a happy expression on their face. Happy for their best friends. Jisoo held her brand new camera and took a picture of you both kissing with Lisa holding a mistletoe above you both. Lisa jumped up with the mistletoe in the same position. A very excited expression on her face. Lisa definitely were your relationship number one supporter. You and Jennie laughed which broke the kiss. You looked in each other's eyes with everything around you both moving in slow motion. It's a moment where it's just you and Jennie against the world.
Jennie looked into your eyes and down to your lips while moving closer again. You kissed her again with much love and adoration. You both couldn't stop kissing each other without missing kissing. Jisoo, Chaeyoung and Lisa couldn't stop giggling at the sight of you both kissing each other non stop. Jennie added tongue into the kiss which caused you to gasps. The sight of you both making out caused Chaeyoung's chipmunk cheeks to flush red in a blush. Jisoo covered her eyes because she wanted the chipmunk to stay innocent.
Lisa cheered you and Jennie's making out on with an amused expression on her face. It's definitely the best Christmas ever in her opinion. Especially because she get's to spend it with you and her best friends.
Jennie could only think about how happy she feels to spend Christmas with you and her best friends. On Christmas Eve all families from her, you and her best friends would join them. She couldn't wait to share more kisses with you and to feed you with her famous delicious cookies. Which she only bakes on Christmas time.
#jennie kim#jennie ruby jane#jendeukie#Jennie#jennie imagines#jennie scenario#jennie x you#jennie x reader#blackpink jennie#blackpink#blackpink imagines#blackpink scenarios#blackpink x you#blackpink x reader#kpop#kpop idols#kpop imagines#kpop scenarios#kpop x you#kpop x reader#no smut#female reader#worth reading#reading recommendations#kpop recommendations#fanfiction recommendation#reblog if you like#christmas#christmas scene#authorforrosie
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birthday from haz and tuwaine feel performative ? the same h&t who have been there for ten years ? I know many friends groups who post each other on insta stories and never been weird. What are you even chatting about ? Do you not have friends
I have a bunch of friends but we talk to each other. Me posting them or them posting me has zero correlation to our actual friendship. This isn’t fucking middle school MySpace.
The only people who get posts are my husband and children. And some others like my parents/siblings if it’s a milestone year.
All of social media is performative let’s be real. I tell my husband happy birthday at midnight each year, his birthday post, our anniversary posts, all performative because it’s done with the intent for others to view.
Your weird outrage also performative.
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[5th blog anniversary]
hello, it's nov 28th today so i welcome you to celebrate the fifth anniversary of this silly blog with me~
it has been around 5+ years of me in this fandom and almost 4 years since i've been active on this blog and taechnological has truly proved to be the most fun part of my bangtan army journey~ ♡
i have made countless happy memories and very many precious friendships on this blog, so many nice and sweet anons and all the cute and funny tags under my posts, i really enjoy logging in here after a tiring day 🥺
jungkook was right when he said the closer you are, the lesser words 😭💖 i feel like i've really built a safe place for me (and hopefully for others too) where we all come and forget all the worries of our real life (even just for a tiny little timeframe), only ugly laughter and crackhead energy in sight 😆💜
also, before i forget, this blog also hit a (kinda) huge follower milestone a couple months ago, so i just wanna say thank you for choosing to hit follow despite looking directly at my deranged activities and still keeping up with me lol i appreciate each and every single one of you a lot, you make my experience here so much better~ ♡
okay not to go overboard with the sappiness (you just have to bear with me, this is the singular sappy post i make once a year 😤💖) just wanna say thank you for keeping this blog alive with your interactions despite the slight decrease in my online time lately. i appreciate you all so much! ♡
i hope you all will continue sticking by side in the coming years too (no pressure tho, i know i can be intolerable at times 💀) let's keep making our experience here a happy memory for us to reflect upon in the future~ ♡
but for now, you all are stuck with me and i will make sure you keep smiling the whole time you're on my blog hehe 😗💖
again, from the bottom of my heart, thank you, mwah~
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Michael Caine wears two watches: an analogue for the time and an Apple for everything else. It even knows his pulse, he says, impressed. Right now, it’s telling him his flat is 26C: warm enough for his wife, Shakira, to pour iced coffee into his flask, but not hot enough for those balcony doors to be open: “It’s blowing a bloody gale in here!”
I slide them shut slightly. Is that OK? A bit more. Enough? Bit more. I close them completely. He’s happy now.
Caine lives in Chelsea Harbour: posh 80s condos and Princess Diana’s gym. He likes the security and tolerates the helicopters. His London penthouse has caramel carpets, 360-degree views, two Oscars and 5,000 photos of his grandchildren.
Below us lies Battersea Bridge, tide low, shore glittering. No, he shudders, he’s never mudlarked. Why not? After all, his first novel, out in November, is about binmen who find uranium down at the dump. “Well,” he says darkly, “other people do things and it goes all right. I do them and bad things happen.”
He looks at me. We’re waiting for his co-star, John Standing, who is stuck in traffic. Caine is a big man with whom to make small talk. It’s not just that your brain short-circuits each time he speaks (Michael Caine?!?!), it’s that at 90, he’s still 6ft 2in, undiminished and simply intimidating.
In 1987, he gave an acting masterclass in which he revealed the secret to being forceful on screen was a) don’t blink and b) mascara. It works face-to-face, too. The first one, anyway.
During the Blitz, says Caine, he watched the city get flattened from his dormer in Camberwell; from here, he’s seen it rise up again. He loves new-build and soft furnishings with the passion of a man raised in an attic with no hot water, one outdoor loo and rickets. Every time a bomb fell, the mattresses doiiinged. “Me and my brother would laugh all through the bleedin’ air raids!”
An update: Standing will be here shortly. I praise the pot-plants and Caine mourns his garden. He was evacuated to Berkshire, where he was fed a tin of pilchards a day and locked in a cupboard for the weekends, and then to rural Norfolk, where he discovered a love of horticulture – later energetically indulged at his own places in Oxfordshire and Surrey.
Less so in Hollywood. He sold up there after someone told him that if he wanted to grow daffodils he’d need to put the bulbs in the fridge for a fortnight. “That was it! Final straw!” But did he do it? “Oh yeah. It worked.”
In comes Standing, 89 but nimble as a debutante, all polish and apologies. They settle down, discuss the weather and a window is discreetly opened. Caine goggles at my iPad, which he mistakes for a phone: “Blimey, that’s a big one!”
The Great Escaper is brilliant, I say. Caine is surprised I’ve seen it, let alone enjoyed it. Didn’t he? “Yeah. But I’ve had films where I liked it but other people didn’t agree with me.”
No wonder it tempted them from retirement: meaty roles dry up as you approach 100. Caine plays Bernard Jordan, a real-life Royal Navy veteran who made headlines in 2014 when he travelled alone from his care home in Hove, East Sussex, to Normandy for the 70th D-day anniversary. The film – flintier than you might think, and very moving – fictionalises a friendship with Arthur, a former RAF pilot (Standing) he meets on the ferry.
Both actors did national service in Berlin after the war; Caine was then drafted to Korea – “a bugger”, he says (his memoir suggests this is understatement). “When we got there they said: the Chinese have just sent a million troops. What? But they were just young kids and old men to take all our ammunition. You shoot at them and then the real fighters come. And that was the Chinese in a nutshell.”
In the film, the pair make a pilgrimage to the war cemetery at Bayeux in Normandy. “What a waste,” cries Bernard as the camera zooms out to show the rows and rows of headstones. Caine doesn’t agree. “You had to have full cemeteries because you’d had to fight the German army, which was not a load of idiots. And the Germans had to be stopped.”
And Korea? Well, communism is “perfectly frightful”, says Standing. Caine nods. “It doesn’t take care of the working class quite the way they say. My father was a fishmonger in Billingsgate, so I knew when I saw the communists, they had no idea what it was all about. Do any working-class people want to live in North Korea?”
They both think national service should be reintroduced. “It gives you a whole new realisation of life,” says Caine. “I notice how different young people are today. They’re so free with everything. Military training makes you think about helping other people. My grandsons – all they do is play football.” (Still, he adds later, they’re also “incredible, unbelievable, and they worry about other people – which is handy”.)
Standing chips in: one of his daughters is “a bit woke” and cautions him about getting cancelled. “It’s horrible! We’re not allowed to say anything. I loathe it. My God, you’re not allowed to have mother-in-law jokes! It’s sort of barking.”
Then again, “things were far less complicated” 70 years ago. He smiles benignly. “Your telephone alone is the most complex thing anybody’s ever dreamed of. You’ve got all the information you ever want. You can chat to Henry VIII. Have you seen the man made of wood and iron playing the most immaculate game of ping-pong and thrashing the ordinary Briton at the other end?”
I haven’t. Caine confesses some concern over robots – that’s partly what his novel, a thriller, is about. “But I’m 90. I don’t worry about the future. I worry if I’m gonna make it to lunch.”
Caine and Standing first met on another hot day, in the summer of 1976, shooting another war movie, The Eagle Has Landed. Caine played a Nazi eager to assassinate Churchill; Standing a rather flaky vicar. Memories of the shoot seem thin on the ground, but they agree moviemaking hasn’t changed much.
“I make my own world,” says Caine. “And if they employ me, they gotta leave me to do it my way. Otherwise I screw it up. And even if I do it my way, I screw it up as well.”
They both chuckle. “Michael, darling!” says Standing.
Have they changed?
Standing sighs. “We’re just so bloody old.”
“And we’re still here,” says Caine.
“Which is incredible! All my mates are brown bread.”
“Oh, mine and all. Sean Connery, Roger Moore. Everybody’s dead. It’s amazing.”
How does that feel?
“Lonely,” says Caine. “I had dinner last night here with eight women. Shakira gets ’em. I don’t get ’em. They’re the wives of my friends. I’m often sitting with a table full of widows.”
Standing empathises. “Hundreds of women round one all the time. And you sit there thinking: give us a break! Ask me something, anything you like!”
Caine nods. “Ask me a question about football! But I’m perfectly happy with all the girls. I love them.”
Again: consult his memoir for more details, but this is putting it mildly. Caine spent the 50s, 60s and early 70s hoovering up hotties across the continents, pausing only for relationships with Natalie Wood and Nancy Sinatra and to refuel on vodka with Terence Stamp and Peter O’Toole.
So when he says he was tired of bachelor life by 1972, you can believe it – he must have been exhausted. He had a night in, saw a Maxwell House ad on telly and resolved to fly to Brazil the next morning to marry the woman with the maracas. No need, said a pal: she was Indian, not Brazilian, and lived on the Fulham Road in west London.
This is one of Caine’s regular chatshow yarns and he duly does it for us today: “I tracked her down! Incredible!” Caine is a bit of an anecdote jukebox – tales triggered by the briefest mention of Cary or Larry or Frank – but with material like his, it’s hard to object. Though charming, he also dominates conversation in general – about which Standing is a gent. Does he miss the 60s? “I don’t miss it, but I love having done it. I used to get into trouble all over the place.”
He and Shakira have been married more than 50 years. Ageing is less awful, he advises, “if you’re married to someone really beautiful who doesn’t grow old. I wake up every morning and there she is!” It’s true: Shakira, 76, does seem preternaturally patient and gorgeous. “What is great about her is that she’s very bright. She was the secretary in the … I forget which country she comes from [Shakira was born in British Guiana, now Guyana], but she was the secretary of the American embassy, so she’s a great secretary for me. She runs everything. It’s unbelievable.”
At the heart of The Great Escaper is another enduring marriage, between Bernie and Irene, played by Glenda Jackson in her final film. She and Caine first worked together 48 years ago. “She was very young and pretty,” he says. “Very attractive. Bloody good actress. But a left-wing socialist and I’m all for making money because I come from a very poor background.” They never talked politics – bit busy making the movies. He saw her five days before she died in June: “She seemed fine.” He’s relieved it was quick.
Bernie and Irene are a devoted couple who, though the film doesn’t discuss it, didn’t have children. Might that have changed their dynamic? “Oh, tremendously,” says Caine. “You don’t have any other separate thing to talk about. You talk about each other. And you don’t have to judge how people feel about someone else. Only you.”
It’s a sharp insight, particularly given that he’s personally “always had children around me like wildfire”. His eldest daughter, Dominique, was born when he was 23, during a brief marriage to the actor Patricia Haines; he and Shakira have another daughter, Natasha. Picking up his eldest grandson from the school is, Shakira tells me later, the highlight of his week. “I love kids,” he says, a bit wistfully.
Standing murmurs agreement. He’s also been married for yonks. The secret, he says, is “laughing with each other”.
Caine is less on-message: “Don’t argue. Don’t try to prove it with arguments or a row. Let ’em do it.”
“Women are No 1 anyway,” says Standing.
“It’s the only place you can get babies,” nods Caine.
“But I gotta say this, Michael: have you seen what women do now?” says Standing. A dramatic pause. He’s a West End veteran, light comedies a specialty. “Cage fighting!” He turns to me. “What possessed your sex to do something like that? For men to cage fight is unthinkable. For women – boom, boom, boom, on each other’s faces! Deranged! But that’s modern life.”
Has Caine seen that? “Oh yeah,” he says blithely. “On television.” And? “I was stunned.” Why? “I wouldn’t do that to anyone. Even if I didn’t like them. I’d just knock ’em out and walk away.”
The real theme of The Great Escaper is – perhaps not one for the poster – that the only escape from old age is death. Yet Caine and Standing continue to produce work that will live on after they’re gone. Caine wrote his first novel bedridden during lockdown, and is now writing a second. Standing is a professional painter. They have six children between them. Are any of these enterprises better or worse as stabs at immortality? There’s only really one, says Caine: “Kindness.” And maybe Alfie. And The Muppet Christmas Carol.
“Michael, darling,” says Standing, “I said to someone the other day: ‘Have you heard of Peter O’Toole?’ She said: ‘Well, I know the name.’ Once you are dead, you are dead. You think of Bogart! But young people only know Goose. What’s he called? Gosling. Big names in the theatre – Gielgud – mean nothing.”
That craft and that class is history, they reckon. When I ask Caine who today’s version of him is, he agrees there isn’t one.
“Because you don’t get young people now who are that far back in society. That had to come forward in great leaps. I think my type of person is extinct. I can’t think of anybody who had a life like mine.”
It wasn’t just the poverty, he says, it was Korea and then, six months later, malaria (he nearly died). “And so it never stopped, you know? Until it did.”
And yet it sort of hasn’t. Caine remains an icon of a time and an energy that feel increasingly exotic. He still calls himself working class and frets over any potential betrayal of his roots. The fate of his brother, Stanley, troubles him. “He just stood there and watched me become a millionaire when he didn’t even have a job. I turned him into someone who couldn’t move. I should have gone and moved him.”
Once, Caine was shopping for a sofa and Stanley – who’d been awol for a while – appeared as part of the team lugging it in from the back. “I grabbed him. I said, ‘You are outta here.’ Oh, it was terrible. I didn’t know where he was.
“He became an alcoholic. So I bought him two houses: one to live in and one to rent so he could have some money to buy some booze.” Caine’s eyes are rheumy. “He’s three years younger than me. And he’s been dead for five years.”
There was an older brother, too, David, born with severe epilepsy and confined to an institution. Caine only found out about him after their mother’s death – though she had visited David secretly each week. Caine then made him as comfortable as possible. His mother spent her final years living in one of the houses he’d bought her with a carer and her two young sons, “who loved my mum like a grandma. I was very happy with that. I did everything for everybody. So that’s it. I’m sitting here, I’ve done it. I can’t do any more.”
The Great Escaper has been widely described as Caine’s final film, just as Harry Brown was in 2009, and then – 24 films later – Best Sellers in 2021. It’s not. He’s shooting another in January: “It’s about someone who is so famous I’d never heard of him. Charles, Charles …”
“ … Darwin,” says Standing.
“Yeah. I play Charles Darwin. And that’ll be it. I won’t do another one after.”
He’s sure?
“No! But the point is, can you do it? Can you remember all the lines? I’ve got used to not working and staying in bed till 11am and staying out late at night. I love it.”
In The Great Escaper, Jackson has a line about life being fun when you’re young, but once you hit her age, “you’re basically buggered”. Present company queers that pitch. “Oh blimey,” says Caine. “I have a great time.” Standing nods. His one concession to old age has been to give up tap-dancing – though you suspect he might oblige in an emergency.
Neither man can think of a single instance in which they’ve been ill-treated because of their age.
“Nobody patronises me,” says Caine.
“We don’t look like we need help,” says Standing.
In Caine’s case, that’s not entirely true. His skin is smooth, his cheeks full – “I’m very lucky the whole face has not collapsed” – and The Great Escaper showcases them with loads of fantastic closeups. Yet he does use a walker and wheelchair. Never had qualms about being seen with them, he says. “Nope. It’s my life and I do what I want.”
“I think you are bloody brave,” says Standing. “Michael, man-to-man, it was an admirable thing to say: ‘Bollocks, I will do the film’, in spite of all those things.’”
I think he’s right. For someone with an image as familiar – and cultivated – as Caine’s, to visibly concede frailty feels courageous. It’s a shame, I say, that “mobility issues” were given as the reason the Queen didn’t attend various events near the end – as if being seen in a wheelchair was inconceivable.
Caine opts not to criticise the Queen. Instead he cues up the story of the first time they met, at a dinner, when she asked him to tell her a joke. He couldn’t think of a clean one. “She pointed to the man on her other side and said: ‘I’m gonna talk to him now. In five minutes I’ll be back and I want a joke.’”
I don’t know what I’d imagined Michael Caine’s Queen impression to sound like, but it’s definitely a lot more mobster. That was quite frightening, I tell him, once he’s finished the joke (long, about a chicken). Does he see any similarities between them?
“I think everyone sees a similarity between themselves and the Queen.”
Even Standing, an actual baronet, demurs at that one. But the fact Caine believes it adds weight to the idea they do share something – the ability, perhaps, to unsettle others through their presence alone. The Great Escaper taps that, too. Bernie prompts in people – Arthur included – profound reckonings, without really trying. Can Caine relate?
“I don’t know,” he says. “A bit, probably, yes. But it could be quite unpleasant. I don’t do things that are unpleasant.”
But you feel you have that power?
“Yeah, oh yeah.”
And what’s that like?
He grins. “Great.”
Our time is up. Caine checks his watch. “28C,” he says, “and that’s with the bloody windows open.”
© 2024 Guardian News, Catherine Shoard
Daily inspiration. Discover more photos at Just for Books…?
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Sciles Week 2023! Save the Date ;)
Hello there, Sciles Enthusiasts!
Sorry for the super delay in everything this year, but I had a hectic first semester, and a bunch of things in real life, but I'm happy to announce today that our event is ON!
This year's event will happen from September 24th to September 30th. We will start on Sciles Day of all days ;)
Anyway, before talking about our themes, just the friendly reminder to read our rules, and that our prompts are just suggestions, that we accept all kinds of works done for the week if they abide by our guidelines! (AND! if the prompt of the other part inspired you more, you can go for it as well ;) )
Now, onto the themes:
Day 1: Sept 24th
Writing: Anniversary
What kind of anniversary? Friendship? Dating? Marriage? Birthdays?
Visuals: Winter
It can be the season, or what winter meant for them in their relationship, anything the word evokes in you about them.
Day 2: Sept 25th
Writing: Spring/ Spring Festivals
I know that September has nothing to do with Spring in the North Hemisphere, but here in the South Hemisphere, Spring will have just arrived. So, how would you relate them with Spring? Maybe even some festivals, what kind would they go?
Visuals: Flowers
What kind of flowers you associate with them? It could be one for each or one that represents both.
Day 3: Sept 26th
Writing: Consequences/Repercussions
Both boys made so many choices, and did so many things during the whole show, and sometimes we lacked some consequences and repercussions for each other. Or maybe it can be something brand new!
Visuals: Lacrosse/Lacrosse games
This game was so important for both of them during the course of the show, and it was at the center of some good fun and important moments. What are your favorite moments of them related to Lacrosse?
Day 4: Sept 27th
Writing: First Meeting
How Scott and Stiles came to be? How it all started? How these two became the duo we love so much?
Visuals: Rage/Anger
What's the moments of them expressing this emotion? How are them expressing this emotion? What marked you most about them and this emotion?
Day 5: Sept 28th
Writing: Free day*
Visuals: Free day*
*A day to rest and let your imagination go wild!
Day 6: Sept 29th
Writing: Game night
Would they have some night they would attribute to be a night just for games? What kind of games do they like? Do they prefer video games or board games?
Visuals: Favorite Looks/Outfit
What's your favorite looks or outfits you like on both? Maybe something both used, or something they would choose for each other.
Day 7: Sept 30th
Writing: Halloween
I know, I know, again another theme that doesn't exactly fit the month, but I was thinking of season 3, why not have Halloween as well as it was a moment that was prelude to so much that was coming.
Visuals: Void!Stiles and Scott
What's your favorite scenes of Void!Stiles and Scott? When you see Void!Stiles and Scott what comes to your mind? What marked you most about the whole situation?
This year's collection: https://archiveofourown.org/collections/scilesweek2023
See you soon, my dear Sciles Enthusiasts!
Banner: Made by me, that's why is so amateurish xD
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Can you do 10 from your prompt list with Marc spector please
Prompt: 10) one muse has been brainwashed and the other one refuses to hurt them, trying to bring them back with a gentle touch + Marc Spector
Rating/Warnings: 18+, reader is brainwashed, reader is an Avatar, major character death but read until the end I promise (you guys know I can’t do angst that ends unhappily)
It was a cruel, cruel trick on Set’s part to fool with Khonshu’s Avatars.
Khonshu had chosen Marc because he was strong, kind-hearted, and worth keeping alive. He had chosen you for much the same reasons. Marc had trained you, taught you self-defense and combat, stealth, strategizing, anything that might be necessary for a fellow Avatar of the Moon God. That, however, led to more than just friendship. You’d fallen in love. It was a slow, rough road for either of you to admit that. But eventually it came to be that you were married, and happy.
Marc cared for you above all else. He would even disobey Khonshu for you. Set knew this.
And so to destroy both Avatars, he had twisted your mind.
You now believed that you’d never known Marc. That he was your enemy. It had started with little things, at first— you not knowing where you were when you woke up, and starting to forget things like anniversaries. Marc had been concerned it was amnesia, especially when one day you questioned the wedding band on your finger. Soon you began to question him.
Over the course of only a few weeks, Set had made you believe that Marc had kidnapped you, holding you hostage as a trophy or pet— he wasn’t sure as to the extent of what Set had made you believe.
But now you were a threat.
You were attacking him. In all of your armor, with all of your strength, you were fighting to kill. To kill him. Khonshu stood on a nearby rooftop, watching with concern. “Her suit will protect her, Marc. Defend yourself!”
But he couldn’t bring himself to do that. He wasn’t going to hurt you, even if you’d be healed immediately after. So he took the hits, the stabs, and the instance where you snapped his arm at the elbow with nothing more than a grunt of pain. He wouldn’t hurt you, even if that choice killed him.
“Baby,” Marc choked out as your armored fist connected with his cheek. The impact threw him to the ground. Marc had had run-ins with Set’s victims before. If you killed him, you would likely regain your memories, and realize what had happened— the grief would kill you, too. He couldn’t let that happen, so he scrambled away. “Y/N…”
You were silent, your eyes hollow. You were in there, somewhere, but you were just a shell of yourself. A monotonous robot that would exact Set’s will. Marc let his mask melt away. “Y/N… Listen to me…” Maybe if he talked to you, you might hear him, wherever you are. “You remember the day I asked you to marry me?” You stalked forward, within range to strike with your spear. Marc rolled to the side, dodging the blow, and continued to speak. “It was a rainy day. I remember being pissed off because I’d had this whole picnic planned for us— you had no idea what was happening— and it was fucking pouring. So we went to a restaurant instead. Your favorite. They got our orders mixed up with somebody else’s and we had to wait for them to fix it. You didn’t understand why I was so pissed.”
Marc barely caught the dagger you threw at him. He just kept talking. “When it was finally fixed, the food was cold. They weren’t even fucking busy. But we ate it anyway. We were hungry. We’d eaten worse.”
Marc walked in tune with you, so that you were circling each other. “When we were done, I forgot my wallet. You had to pay the check. Real fucking nice for a guy who’s trying to get up the courage to propose.”
Your steps faltered. Your brow furrowed, confused. Marc felt relief. Hands raised to show he had no weapons, he began to slowly step forward, cautiously. He didn’t want to spook you. To his relief, you stood still. “I remember coming out of the restaurant and deciding to take you to the London Eye. Propose at the top. We didn’t make it that far— I was splashed by a car speeding through a puddle. Head to toe, I was covered in mud and gunk…”
He kept his voice low as he approached. He was crying, he was sure of it. “It started pouring again. We took cover under a little shitty gazebo, soaked through to the bone… And I was ranting. I don’t even remember what the fuck I was saying. But you took my face in your hands, made me look at you, and asked me what was wrong.” Marc snorted at the memory. He was almost within arm’s reach of you now. “I just blurted it out. I was never able to hide anything from you. Told you I wanted to ask you to marry me, but the whole damn day was just one thing wrong after another. Said it felt like the whole world was against us.”
Marc’s hands tentatively came up to rest on your arms. You let him. Baby steps forward, baby steps… Marc’s smile was strained as he looked into your eyes. “You told me you didn’t care if it was. You told me you loved me, and it didn’t matter when, or where, or how, and… And you said yes. You said you’d say yes a thousand times over, in any lifetime. And I love you. Enough to fight gods to keep you safe. Baby, do…” He shifted, fighting sobs. His voice was a hoarse whisper. “Do you remember that day?”
Your eyes trailed up his chest to meet his eyes. In them, Marc saw familiarity. Realization. “M…Marc?”
His heart jumped. Despite his tears, he smiled. “Yeah, baby; I’m here. I’m right here.” You were still struggling. He could see it. But the fact was that you were shining through Set’s torture, fighting it. Marc leaned forward and pressed a closed-mouth kiss of relief to your lips. You were stiff against him, but you didn’t pull away.
Then he felt a rush of cold energy.
Khonshu’s control.
He fought with every fiber of his being, but he still heard the tear of fabric and impacted flesh. You gasped as Marc’s crescent dagger stabbed up through your ribs, piercing your heart. Marc was consumed by terror, crying out as you started to fall and Khonshu relinquished control. “No! No no no, Y/N! Y/N!”
You were already gone as Marc knelt to the ground with you in his arms. “Baby, no…” His hand ran over your face, searching for any flicker of life, but your eyes had lost their light, and no breath came from your lips.
He’d sworn to protect you. To love you. And yet, he’d taken your life with his own hands. Khonshu had done it, a reasonable part of his mind tried to say. But he couldn’t accept that— your final memory had been of your husband stabbing you, killing you, what had he done…
Marc cradled your body to his chest and screamed his sobs into the crook of your neck, rocking back and forth as if to comfort you.
“Ease your grief, Marc Spector,” Khonshu rumbled, and Marc couldn’t fight the surge of rage he felt. “I merely did what you could not. Set would never have relinquished control while she was alive. Besides… do you really think I am so careless with the lives of my Avatars?”
Marc didn’t have time to be confused by his last sentence. With a shudder and a cough, you gasped back to life, making him jump. “Y/N?!” His voice cracked and was an octave higher, wondering if this was a trick, or if some god had really granted you life.
“Marc—“ you wheezed hoarsely, cut off as he engulfed you in the tightest embrace he could muster.
“Baby,” Marc sobbed, “You’re ok, I’ve got you; I’m so sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry—“
“It wasn’t you,” You croaked, burying your face in his neck. “I knew it wasn’t you.”
Marc held you close, wrapping his cape around you and whispering how much he loved you. And you held him, as a lifetime of memories came back to you and you remembered just how much you loved Marc Spector.
Most prominently, you recalled the day he’d asked you to marry him.
“I wanted… I was gonna… I was gonna ask you to marry me— I don’t want to spend a moment away from you. I want to wake up with you, I want to fight alongside you, I want to be there with you for the rest of my life. But it’s taken me weeks to build up the courage, and… and now everything… everything’s against us...”
You took his bowed head in your hands, making him look at you. “Oh, Marc…” You pecked his lips. “I don’t care if everyone and everything on this planet were against us... I’d always say yes.”
His smile, made more bright by the disheveled state he was in and slathered in runny mud, lit up your whole world.
In the present day, you leaned into him and cried with him. You’d come back to your husband— it wasn’t death that had scared you.
It was being apart from Marc Spector.
Give me a prompt and a character!
#moon knight#steven grant#marc spector#jake lockley#steven grant x reader#marc spector x reader#jake lockley x reader#oscar isaac#oscar isaac hernandez estrada
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