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wrioluvr · 14 hours

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subby vampire x dom male reader pt 2 pt 1

thank u guys for liking kliff!! he's so baby. felt kinda mean and thought about a scenario where reader is like, a regular monster fucker and poor kliff finds out he hooked up with another vampire and gets super jealous teehee... but this is wholesome tho.

content: reader is kind of a player, blowjob (reader receiving), reader loves tormenting the poor old man, more plot-focused than pure smut

★ ; 🦇🍷. . ♱

after visiting kliff at his crumbling manor a few more times, you decided that you were getting tired of making the trip out into the woods everytime, and invited him over to your house instead, an invitation he eagerly accepted. though he kept a calm composure, inwardly, his thoughts were running wild - he would finally be able to bask in a whole home full of your scent.... maybe even steal a few small trinkets he could toy with whenever he felt lonely... or... or even get a feel of your bed, where he fantasised about waking up next to you and spending the rest of his days as your faithful househusband. oh, how delightful.

"thank you ever so much for allowing me to enter your abode. i am most honoured." thanking you profusely, he elegantly sat down on your sofa, only to immediately scrunch up his face in discomfort. you stared at him, puzzled. "what's wrong? you don't like my home?"

"no, no... it's not that... it's just that... this scent is so familiar. in an unnverving way..." he mumbled, talking to himself. suddenly, a look of recognition, mixed with horror, dawned on his face. "correct me if i'm wrong, but... there's not a chance you've had another vampire over.... is there?"

"oh! i forgot you vampires have a heightened sense of smell. yeah, i hooked up with another vampire like, 3 weeks ago." you said nonchantly, like it was the most insignificant thing ever. kliff merely gaped at you, aghast at your casualness. "so... so... i'm not your first vampire relationship?" he asked meekly, almost like he was afraid of the answer.

"well, yes. i dated, hmm...." you start to list them on your fingers. "two vampires, one werewolf, one merman... oh, right, and one evil ass fairy. he was mean."

poor kliff looked like he was about to collapse, his hand clutching his chest dramatically. thankfully he was sitting down, otherwise he would have fallen over. "where on earth do you even find these creatures?"

"i get around."

"and you never thought to mention this?!"

"i mean, i didn't really think it was important..."

kliff sighed, suddenly feeling a little insecure at his complete lack of romantic experience in contrast to your many flings. "may i at least see what your past vampire suitors looked like?" he didn't want to admit it, but he was suddenly feeling very clingy, even more than usual. he had to be better than all your exes! so that you wouldn't leave him like you left them!

"sure. here you go." you pull out your phone and show him a picture, only for kliff to gasp loudly and clutch his chest even tighter. what a drama queen.

"HIM."

"you know him??"

"that little whore was going around sleeping with every man and woman in town a hundred years ago! i cannot BELIEVE he is still so promiscuous in this day and age. he even seduced you..."

"woah! language, kliff!"

kliff stops mid-ramble and clears his throat in embarassment. "my apologies. this is most uncouth of me. i do not know why i am getting so frustrated over this. the two of you are not seeing each other anymore, correct?"

"yes. you're the only one i'm seeing right now."

"and, if i may be so bold to inquire,,,, how was he like as a lover?"

"he was kinda annoying." kilff let a smirk escape his lips upon hearing this. "i knew it-" "the head was good though."

"what- what does 'head' mean?"

"he sucked my dick." you say bluntly.

"oh, good heavens."

"don't be a prude! wait... kliff, are you jealous of him?"

"i most certainly am not."

"at your big age? please be serious." you tease, amused at how possessive he suddenly got.

"do NOT make fun of me. i said i'm not." the pout adorning his face said otherwise.

kliff barely noticed it, but slowly he inched closer and closer to you, eyes scanning your neck as he frantically searched for bite marks.

"did he bite you anywhere? did it hurt? you must know, i would never even consider drinking from you, right?" he took your hand, eyes searching desperately for validation, any form of praise that indicated you thought he was the better vampire.

you rolled your eyes. "jeez, kliff. i didn't take you for the possessive type. don't worry, none of my previous vampire lovers have drunk from me."

that did little to reassure him, since he was on the same page. "then... then... i must be better at this 'head' thing!" he declares, face full of misplaced determination. you almost double over laughing.

"it's not a competition! my god, you're so unserious."

"it does not matter to me! i must be better than that lustful shame of a vampire at every aspect. especially since we are of the same species."

"okay, okay. calm down. i'll let you try."

·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·

"just let me know you can't breathe or whatever. i'll guide you through your first time, yeah?" kliff nods, a blush extremely prominent on his undead features as he knelt between your thighs. he quite enjoyed this... submissive position.

"also- watch the fangs." the authoritative, yet gentle tone of your voice sent shivers down his spine.

he himself could be considered a monster, but he paled in comparison to the monster that sprung out of your pants once he clumsily undid the zipper. kliff gasped, a look of pure lust and nervousness written all over his expression as your slightly erect cock hovered over his face.

"so... basically... you just put it inside your mouth, then start sucking it. easy enough, right? come on, don't tell me you've never heard of a blowjob in your entire existence."

"of course i have..... i admit, i own quite a bit of... erotic fiction." he mumbles, eyes still on your cock, cheeks growing redder by the second. "but, goodness, it's so different seeing a real phallus up close. especially one of your size."

"phallus??? just say cock."

"mhm...." he hesitates, unsure where to even begin. flustered, he looks up imploringly, silently begging for you to guide him.

you chuckle at his frozen state, completely at a loss on what to do. "so needy. i'll help you."

tenderly, you run a hand through his soft hair, applying just a little bit of power to tug his head forward, guiding him to your tip. obediently, he opened his mouth, taking the shaft inside. it was warm, his rough tongue grazing over your tip, causing you to grip his hair a little tighter. kliff let out a masochistic moan in response. slowly, he ventured further down your length, but unable to reach the base without gagging. he looked up at you with apologetic eyes, but you squeezed his shoulder to let him know he was doing well. "good job, kliff. you're a natural." spurred on by your praise, kliff found a lewd rhythm, mouth bobbing up and down in a continuous passionate attempt to make you feel good.

your small grunts of pleasure kept him going. panting, you ask, "you sure you've never done this before, kliff? you're so good." he frantically shakes his head, mouth still full of cock, as if the idea that he engaged in such intimate acts with anyone but you was horrifying. he was loyal like that. it was intoxicating, the head only vampires could provide - fangs lightly grazing your cock's sensitive areas, the slight thrill unmatched. merman head was sloppy, werewolf head was rough, but vampire head was a little dangerous. you liked that.

soon enough, you were about to cum. you warned him, patting his shoulder twice, he vigorously nodded, giving you permission to cum inside his mouth. he'd only ever been used to having blood in his mouth, so having your cum inside instead was a new experience. but he liked it. maybe a little too much, as he swallowed it so enthusiastically. you gazed upon him affectionately, finding his virgin excitement over such lewd matters endearing.

"how was i?" the breathless question hung in the air, a reminder of the atmosphere thick with your intertwined tension.

cupping his face with one hand, the other stroking his hair soothingly, you muttered the words he most wanted to hear. "you were better than him."

kliff jumps into your arms, nuzzling his face into your shoulder. "thank you. you're the absolute best." he's so content to spend the rest of his days with you. treat him with care, yeah?

>ᵥᵥ< 💘

tags: @4eaever @szapizzapanda @flyingsquids @vampmasc

omg i'm so happy with this one, one of my fav writings i've ever done so far. i felt like i characterised kliff and captured their dynamic quite well here hehehe

#dom male reader #top male reader #male reader #vampire x reader #vampire x male reader #monster x reader #monster x male reader #vampire x human #vampire imagine #wrioluvr: kliff

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cheeeeseburger · 2 days

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Ilicit affairs

Sergio Perez x Reader

A/N: Hi, I'm not sure about this one! English is not my first language, apologies for the mistakes!

You and Sergio had just gotten into a fight. It was a big one, the kind that left you wanting space from the other. Since the hotel room forced you to be in the same space, you had gotten on a long walk around town. You had time to think, and although it hurt, your choice was made.

As soon as you walked in the hotel room, Sergio got up from where he was sitting on the bed. “Mi pastelito, I was worried you were not going to come back.” He pulled you in his arms. You hugged him back, taking care to note how he smells, the way it feels to be in his arms, how loved you felt. “This was a stupid fight. Let’s forget about it, okay?” he asked while carefully brushing your hair with his fingers. You immediately got teary eyes.

“Sergio, we need to talk.” You pulled his hand, so you were both sitting on the edge of the bed. He looked so concerned that it only made you want to cry harder. “¿Qué pasa?” You took a deep breath before saying out loud something that would break both of your hearts.

“I think we should stop seeing each other. I can’t be your mistress anymore.”

Every single word from those two sentences hurt. You had been his mistress for the last two years, ever since you had fallen for his charms at a GP. Since you were working for an F1 team, you were at all the races, and you and him naturally started and affair. You knew what you two shared wasn’t right, you knew you were the other woman, but you two shared something so special that you ignored all your moral judgement. You just listened to a lot of Lana Del Rey and cried whenever the urge to publicly show off your love was too strong.

Being his lover was a terribly beautiful thing. Nobody on Earth could ever feel as loved as you when you were with Sergio in private. He adored you and worshiped you for your mind, your body, your love. During those moments, you pretended he was your fiancé, your husband, the father of your children. You cosplayed as his wife. But your fantasy was always interrupted. In public, he had his wife and kids, and you stood to the side, pretending your heart was not longing for more, acting like you didn’t even know him. You let guys flirt with you since you were technically single. They all thought you were playing hard to get when you didn’t text them back.

But after two years of this illicit affair, your heart couldn’t take it anymore. The guilt was starting to be overwhelming. You were afraid of confessing everything anytime someone mentioned his name. This wasn’t fair to you or his family, and that’s why you had to stop seeing each other.

“What? Are you serious?” Unfortunately, you were. You batted your eyelashes to chase the tears away. “Sergio, this has been going on for too long. I can’t live with the thought that I’m possibly a homewrecker.” He looked at his ring finger that was always empty whenever you were together.

“Mi pastelito, you’re not a homewrecker, my wife doesn’t know about us, and she will never find out! We don’t have to stop, please don’t make us stop.” He was in agony, truly panicking when he thought about losing you. You caressed his face, trying to comfort him. You needed comforting too. “Baby, you know the truth always comes out, especially with your level of fame. This isn’t fair to your children or your wife. I can’t be the one to ruin your relationship with your family.” A selfish little voice inside of you was screaming at you to ruin his family, make him divorce his wife so he’d finally fully be yours. Mine mine mine mine

“I’ll divorce my wife. My children, they’ll understand. It will be fine!” The selfish voice roared at his words, but the rest of you didn’t. At this point, he was desperate, trying everything to make you stay. “Don’t say that. You don’t mean it. If you divorce your wife to be with me, one day, you will wake up and realize that this was all a mistake, that you should have stayed with her. You’ll start to resent me, I’m sure. I love you too much to let you do that,” you said softly, like you would to a child.

Sergio closed his eyes and let you comfort him. You continued: “I don’t want to be the other woman anymore. I want to be someone’s girlfriend in public, maybe even someone’s wife. I want to kiss you after a race, I want to go out in a restaurant with you, I want the whole world to know we’re in love, but I know you can’t give it to me.”

He immediately protested. “Mi pastelito, that’s what I’m saying! I’ll get a divorce, and I’ll marry you instead. I’ll get you a big diamond ring. We can have a big wedding, so everyone will see. Please, mi amor, give us a chance!”

You gave him a soft kiss. Saying yes would be so easy, and it was everything you wanted. But you could never live with yourself if he let his family down for you. “Baby, it’s okay. It’s all okay. In a few minutes, I’m going to leave this hotel room, and you’ll have to let me go, okay? We will probably see each other at the races, but we will look away and continue walking. The only thing I ask for is that you be the best version of yourself for your wife and your children. Please, work on your marriage, take care of your wife, be the perfect father for your children. You owe me that much.” You were both crying now, realizing that in a few minutes, you would never be in each other’s lives ever again. In a few minutes, you would walk out as a free woman, heartbroken but free, nonetheless.

“I promise. I’ll really try, even though you will always be in my heart. I will always look for you in a crowd, always wish that things had been different. I love you, mi pastelito.” It was his turn to comfort you. He took your hands and gently caressed them.

“I love you too, so much it hurts.” You smiled weakly through the tears. “When I’ll see you with you wife and children, I will be happy. I’ll know that we have done the right things. And when you see me in the paddock with some other guy, you’ll have to be happy, too.” He made a pained face at the last part.

“You know I could never be happy to see you with someone else. You should be with me.” He looked so sad, so hurt.

“Then you know how I have felt for the last two years, whenever I saw you with your wife. That’s why I must go, baby.” You kissed him, and Sergio and you knew it was the last kiss you two would ever share.

It was tender, filled with love and adoration for the other. It tasted like “maybe in another life” and “how come we can’t be together in this one?”. The kiss felt like heartbreak and love at the same time. When you pulled away, the look in his eyes almost crushed you to death. Leaving him was the most difficult thing you had ever done. When you stood up from the bed, he did not let go of your hand. He tried to pull you back, but you stood strong. When he realized you were actually leaving, he kissed your hand and laid his head on your arm. This was the final act of your story. You were the one that got away. If this was a movie, the director would get an Oscar for filmography and another one for screenplay.

He finally let go of you, after what could’ve been minutes or hours. You did not dare to look back as you stepped out of the room, because you knew the look of anguish and despair on his face would be the death of you. When you closed the door, you were not longer a mistress, but a lovesick woman. At least, you were guilt-free. Almost guilt-free.

。。+゜゜。。+゜゜。。+゜゜。。+゜゜。。+゜゜。。+゜゜。。+

The next few weeks were hell. You were missing your lover like crazy, and apparently, so did he, because he had sent multiple texts asking to see you again. Even though the temptation was there, you did not reply to any of his messages. You did read them multiple times and cried a lot over them, but that doesn’t count, right?

The fact that you were working in F1 and attending all the races didn’t help. You wanted to swoon every time you saw Sergio’s face on a poster. On a few occasions you almost ran into him, but you always managed to hide before he could see you. Your heartbeat was so fast and so loud, you swore he would discover you because of it.

To distract you and to respect your part of the deal, you started seeing an engineer. It had been four months since you lost your title of Sergio’s mistress, and when he asked you out, you said yes. He was kind, gentle, and way more into you than you were into him. In other words, he was the perfect rebound.

It was the week of the Australian GP, and the guy who was now your boyfriend took you to a nice restaurant to celebrate your two months. Honestly, things were going great. You were taking things slow with him, and although your stupid heart betrayed you by beating fast every time you saw Sergio, you weren’t nearly as upset as you were three months ago. You felt good about yourself.

You excused yourself to go to the bathroom before dessert. It really was a nice place. You might have had one too many Aperol Spritz, though.

“Oh, I’m so sorry, please excuse me!” You apologized as you ran into a man. When you looked up, it was Mr. Sergio Perez himself, thankfully without Mrs. Perez. That would have been awkward, or at least more awkward than this already was.

“Mi pastelito, it’s you. It’s really you,” was all Sergio said. He wasn’t sure if you were real or not. Perhaps you were cake?

“Hi,” you avoided his gaze and tried to runaway, but he grabbed your arm. His touch immediately took you back to endless illicit nights spend together, where you had to restrain yourself from leaving marks on his body. Instead, he left love bites on yours.

“Are you really going to run away from me? Hide from me once again?” Oh, so he had seen you. Oops.

“Sergio, I don’t think this is a good idea. I’m on a date right now, we’re celebrating our two months” you confessed sheepishly.

He held on to your arm possessively. “Yes, I heard everything about that new boyfriend of yours. Congratulations, I guess.” He pulled you closer to him, so he could whisper in your ear. “But I don’t think you’ve truly moved on. I know I sure as hell haven’t. Mi pastelito, does he know you’ll never love him like you loved me? Like you still love me?” He pulled back then kissed you on each cheek, like you were old acquaintances meeting again. “It was lovely to see you. Have fun on your date, mi amor.”

He left you standing there, in shock and more in love with him than you had ever been. A five-minute interaction with him made you head over heels once again. How cruel was that for you, but also for your new boyfriend. When you went back to your seat, your boyfriend happily informed you that an anonymous gentleman had picked up your tab. You didn’t need to be Sherlock Holmes to figure out who was the mysterious man.

The next morning, you broke up with your boyfriend.

。。+゜゜。。+゜゜。。+゜゜。。+゜゜。。+゜゜。。+゜゜。。+゜

Oh, you were definitely tipsy. Perhaps even drunk? But that’s the Miami GP afterparties for you!

Hey baby, it’s me!!!!!!!

Sergio jumped when he saw your name pop on his notifications. It was like a siren call he had hoped for in vain since you left him. He replied immediately.

Hello, are you okay mi amor?

Are you alone?

Yes, why?

Can I call you?

“Hello?” Sergio picked up the phone, confused but happy that you were calling him at midnight.

“Hiiiiiiiiiiii baby, it’s me!” He chuckled when he realized that you were drunk. He would have preferred that you had called him sober, but when it came to you, he would take anything.

“Hello, mi pastelito. Are you alright?” He hoped you were not passed out somewhere. He heard people shouting your name in the background, so you were probably with friends, thankfully.

“Oh baby, I’m doing soooooooo good actually. These guys keep buying me shots. It’s great!” He definitely didn’t like to hear that.

“I think you should slow down. Tell these guys to back off.” You were pleased to hear his possessive tone.

“Are you jealous? Because if you are, that’s hot. All of this is your fault, anyway.”

“Really? How come? And when it comes to you, I am always jealous.” He heard you sigh.

“Well, because I saw you the other day, I had to break off with my boyfriend. It wasn’t fair to him. Now, I’m drunk in the club, and I keep telling people it’s because I just broke up with my boyfriend but really, I’m trying to get over you.” He softened at your words.

“I don’t want you to get over me, mi amor. In fact, I’m glad that you’re not with that other guy anymore. Why don’t you come over and we can talk about it?” You were drunk, but not drunk enough to forget why you shouldn’t see him.

“Checo, I really, really, really think that this is a bad idea. We were doing so good, we hadn’t seen each other in months.” You whined. “But I just miss you so much, I can’t help it.” He smiled at your words. This was the longest conversation you two had since you broke up.

“Don’t fight it, mi amor. Text me the address, and I’ll come pick you up.” Oh, he was good. It almost worked.

“I see what you’re doing,” you could hear him laugh. “Here’s what going to happen, okay? I’ll convince some guy in the club to buy me some shots, and if it works and I get drunk enough, I’ll call a cab to go see you. Text me the address of your hotel, please, just in case.” He wasn’t so sure about your plan.

“I don’t like this. Why don’t I just come pick you up?” He especially didn’t like the part that involved you flirting your way to free shots.

“Come on, baby, learn to live a little! It’ll be a surprise. I’m going to hang up right now, okay?” He tried to stop you, but it was too late. He texted you his location and kept checking his phone to make sure he hadn’t missed your call or a message from you.

Finally, at one in the morning, his phone rang.

“Hey baby, it’s me again!” He liked that you had started calling him baby again. “I’m on my way to your hotel, will you please let me in?” He was already sprinting down to the hotel lobby.

“Of course, mi amor, I’ll be there.”

“Also, the last guy that bought me a drink was pissed that I was not coming home with him, until I said that I knew Sergio Perez really well. He said he would forgive me if you sent him an autograph. Do you think you could do that?” He laughed.

“Yeah baby, I can do that. Are you nearby? I’m in the lobby.”

“I’ll be there in a few minutes.” You shrieked when you got to the hotel. “Okay, I’m here. Bye bye now!” You hung up the phone and practically jumped out of the car. Maybe you shouldn’t have drunk that last sex on the beach.

“Mi pastelito, you look gorgeous.” He smiled in appreciation. It’s true, you did look gorgeous, in your short dress that barely covered anything. You gave him a little spin.

“Thank you, baby, it got me so many free drinks!” He chcukled at that, even if he didn’t like the thought of other guys circling you like sharks. “Although maybe I should’ve toned it down, because if I wasn’t so drunk, I wouldn’t be here.” You sighed. He pulled you in a hug, and it was like coming home. It was like nothing had changed. The mistress was back.

“I’m glad you’re here, mi amor.” He kissed the top of your head. “Let’s go inside.”

You didn’t make it to the elevator before you were all over him. As soon as the doors closed, you were kissing him like a starved woman, which is what you were. You had cut him off your diet, but the craving was too strong. He made you sit on the handrail to get a better angle. This could have been a shot straight out of a porn movie, the way you were both desperate to touch the other, the sounds you made. Plus, an elevator scene is always a hit.

“I just missed you so much, baby. I can’t help loving you!” You said between kisses.

“That’s good, because I love you too.” The elevator doors opened. Thank God there wasn’t anyone else. He led to you to his hotel room, never breaking the kiss. Your lover was talented.

Once you were inside the room, he pushed you against the wall to stun you with kisses all over the skin your dress showed. So, basically everywhere on your body. You were already moaning.

“Baby, we have to think. We shouldn’t be doing this. We are supposed to stay away from each other, remember? I’m drunk, so I have an excuse, but you don’t!” He took his sweet time to answer you, as he was too busy marking you.

“It’s funny, I can’t remember anything, except that I love you. Oh well.” You protested weakly. His touch on your body after months apart felt too good for you to remember your morals. You forced him to remove his shirt. You still remembered the number one rule of being a mistress: never leave a mark. You were very careful not to scratch him, even if that’s all you wanted to do. You both made your way to the bed tangled with each other.

“I want to be on top of you, baby, so I can remember this moment. This is our last time, for real this time.” He sat against the headboard and let you straddle him.

“Mi pastelido, I don’t think there’ll ever be a last time when it comes to you and me.” You shut him up by removing your dress. He looked you up and down lovingly. “I missed this, mi amor. You’re way too beautiful for your own good.” He made you blush.

“Thank you, baby.” You started to move on top of him. He gripped your waist to help you move while kissing you. Oh, your affair was so back, whether you wanted it or not.

When he started to unzip his pants, you suddenly remembered one tiny detail.

“After I dumped my boyfriend, I stopped taking the pill. I know it sucks, but do you have a condom?” Sergio shook his head.

“No, mi amor, I was not expecting you to come here, I don’t have anything.”

A big neon sign with the word DANGER flashed in your head, but stupid drunk you decided to ignore it. Having him again was just too good.

“I’m clean, so that’s okay. But we’ll have to be really careful!” He nodded.

“I’m clean too. I’ll pull out, it’s going to be okay.” He started to make you move on top of him again. You continued kissing him. The sign still flashed in your head.

After that, things got hot very quickly. When he got inside of you, you couldn’t help but scream his name everytime he moved. You started to breathe rapidly. Still, you were watching him to make sure he really did pull out. You were already in a big enough mess, adding to it was unnecessary.

“Baby, I swear, I’m going to come very soon.” He was too busy pleasing you to comment, but he did make grunting noises. Why did you two every stopped seeing each other again?

Only a short while later, when you were arching your back, you had your orgasm. It was heveanly, You fell lifelessly against his shoulder, and your guard slipped. You heard him finish inside of you at that exact moment. You gasped, and immediately tried to get off him.

“Oh no, this is bad, like really bad.” He realized his mistake.

“I really tried, I swear!” You weren’t listening to him. You were too busy freaking out.

“I have to... I have to go!” You were scrambling to get dressed. He was freaking out too, more by the fact that you were preparing to leave him once again.

“Mi amor, calm down! It’s going to be fine! At least stay the night, we'll deal with it in the morning!” He was desperately trying to get you to stay.

You were putting on your shoes. “I’m really sorry, but I have to go.” You hadn’t noticed, but you were crying. “This was a mistake. It won’t happen ever again!” You got out of the hotel room. He tried to chase you, but you were running down the hallway, and you were surprisingly fast, even with how much you had drunk.

When you looked at yourself in the mirror in the elevator, you had mascara tears running down your cheeks. You were nothing but an illicit affair. You saw nothing but the other woman in your reflection. This was your Black Swan moment.

#f1 fanfic #f1 imagine #f1 x reader #f1 #f1 fic #formula 1 #sergio perez #sergio checo pérez #sergio perez x reader

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writingquestionsanswered · 1 day

Note

I used to love writing when I was in high school, but stopped after I graduated because of life. Now, after almost a decade, I want to get back into it but I don't know how. I have so many ideas but I tend to bounce around the same variations and don't know how to stick to one thing, or how to just get back into the rhythm of writing actively. Or even reading actively.

Any advice?

Getting Back to Reading and Writing

What you're experiencing is what I like to think of as "the creative zoomies."

After so long away from actively reading and writing, there's now this flood of ideas, plans, books you want to read, and stories you want to write. You can't settle and focus on a single thing because your brain wants to do ALL THE THINGS, so you keep bouncing back and forth between things hoping something will stick.

First things first... DEEP BREATH.

As I said in an earlier post, remember: there is no ticking clock. It may feel like there is, sometimes, but we're just little ants on a planet doing our things. There are no deadlines unless you sign up for any, and you don't have to worry about that right now.

So... start by taking an honest look at your schedule and your life, and see if you can figure out a realistic estimate of how much time you have in a given week. Where are there slots of time you can dedicate to writing? How about reading?

Next, it can be immensely helpful if you have a comfortable, relaxing space, free from distraction and interruption, where you can go to write. Some people like to go write at a coffee shop or library to get away from family shenanigans or bothersome housemates. If it's not a billion degrees where you are, you might also try your patio, yard, or a nearby park. Listening to soft music or "ambience rooms" (tons on YouTube) through headphones can also help you focus. There are also still some different apps and programs for distraction free writing. Just make sure to save often and keep a master document on your computer to prevent losing all your work in case the app or program gets glitchy. Also: put your phone on silent, turn off your internet if you must, and let people know not to bother you. This is your writing time... don't be afraid to guard it fiercely.

As for choosing ideas, I'm a big fan of the old-fashioned methods... random number pickers, drawing out of a hat, rolling dice... But you can also do a process of elimination based on what appeals to you the most. If you get it down to two, and then you're disappointed with the one you're left with, you know the one you just eliminated is the right idea to go with.

If you're not sure what to write, try doing some writing prompts. There are lots available online and there are some great books with writing prompts. Doing one a day can be a great way to get yourself back in the habit of writing again.

As for reading, start by reading during moments of spare time, such as if you're taking a bath, riding your stationary bike, sitting in a waiting room, or riding public transportation. You can even read during your morning coffee or your lunch break. Also, embrace the world of audio books. This is one of my favorite ways to read, because I can do it while I'm exercising, showering, cleaning, cooking, driving, doing projects... I get through so many more books by listening to audio books. More than anything, just remember that once again, there's no ticking clock. You don't have to finish a certain number of books before the end of the year. Read what you want, at the pace that works for you, and don't be afraid to DNF if a book isn't working for you.

I hope this helps!

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

♦ Questions that violate my ask policies will be deleted! ♦ Please see my master list of top posts before asking ♦ Learn more about WQA here

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andy-wm · 2 days

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Do you think Jikook took a break from each other last year? What do you think was going on?

Hey Anon, i know you asked this a couple months ago. Sorry that i took a long while to answer ... i thought about it a lot. Not because I was thinking about if they took a break, but because i was questioning what would prompt a person to think they did.

Maybe you didn't see all the things i saw?

If you did see it all, maybe you're more sceptical than i am?

I wondered if maybe I am too much of a romantic, or if i was seeing things that aren't there.

Did I read too much into all those livestreams JK did to hype Jimin when he was promoting FACE last year? All the times he watched the promos with ARMY and then watched the youtube compilation of BTS teasing Jimin, and then sang Jimin's songs.

Was i too taken in by the comments back and forth on Weverse last year when Jimin was recording his music shows, or the fact that Jimin went live in the car on the way home from Inkigayo and spent the entire trip chatting to JK as though ARMY wasn't there.

Did I misconstrue the fact that Jimin and Jungkook made TWO trips overseas together last year without any apparent reason. (Yes there are rumours about a camping trip and other content but that seems like an excuse rather than a reason )

Did i misunderstand JK's visit to Jimin's dance practice, or the glum comments jimin made in his live about JK working too hard, or the fond way JK spoke about Jimin on Suchwita?

Did i see too much significance in JK begging Jimin to do a livestream with him while naked, in bed, and flexing his biceps shamelessly?

Did i place too much emphasis on the fact the JK sang backing vocals for Jimin's hidden track on his album, in a song that was very clearly a love song for ARMY.

Did i overestimate the importance of the half naked photo of the two of them that Jimin posted for Jungkook’s birthday?

Did i misunderstand what made JK come directly from his workout to join Jimin’s Production Diary viewing, or that JK was completely prepared to sit there next to Jimin if he was needed (or to leave if he wasn't).

Did i get carried away by the idea of them spending Chuseok together on a yacht?

Did i jump to conclusions about them enlisting in the military as companions and taking a post in one of the most inhospitable and dangerous units just so they could be together?

To be objective, and because I'm the first to admit that we honestly dont know what they do when there's no camera around, i will say maybe they did have a break. It's entirely possible they spent a few days apart. Maybe even a week?

All couples need time apart. All people need personal space and the opportunity to be alone with their thoughts.

It's part of having your own identity.

It's heathy to have time to rest and recharge no matter how much you love someone.

Don't ever be afraid of having your own space, and time to yourself, anon! It will make the time you spend with your partner even more rewarding 💜

#jeon jungguk #park jimin #jikook #kookmin #국민 #true love

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jji-lee · 13 hours

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when they says something which ends up hurting you

did this in a different format so hopefully it's still okay - enjoy! ☺

⟡ mark - tense silence

takes him a minute to even register what he said. seeing your face sadden he'll start to stutter, wanting to say something, but not knowing how to organize his thoughts. he'll just sit there for a minute scared that he'll say something wrong again. ends up muttering a short, "i'm sorry you know i'm not good with words, just give me a second okay" more awkward silence as he thinks, but he'll reach for your hand to give you reassurance as you wait. doesn't like to act without thinking, he needs time to gather his thoughts, please be patient.

⟡ renjun - stubborn comments after

when he sees your eyes start to water he'll immediately try to excuse himself, "you know i didn't mean it that way" "can you just listen to me" "why are you jumping to conclusions," which obviously makes you feel worse. he'll pick at his nails and straighten his sideburns, not understanding that he's making you feel worse. eventually he'll gently grab your face to make you look at him, "okay please just, you know i hate to see you cry, let me explain, please." it's hard for him to admit he's wrong, but he knows he needs to apologize eventually, excuse his slight attitude, he's trying.

⟡ jeno - immediate regret

as soon as the words come out of his mouth he knows he messed up. immediately grabs you and pulls you into his embrace. "wait, let me explain, that didn't come out right" you'd try to push him away, "jeno, let me go, i don't wanna hear it" but he'd just pull you closer dipping his head into your neck, "no, i'm sorry, please just listen to me" he'd force you to sit there with him hugging you listening to his explanations and apologies. best boyfriend to talk things out with, you don't need to explain whats wrong he always seems to know, pro at reading your body language.

⟡ haechan - begs for forgiveness

feels actually so bad that he said anything that would hurt you, feels worse that you think he would ever try to intentionally hurt you. eyes start to water seeing your hurt expression, feels like kicking himself. however, he has a little sass in him, he's haechan of course, and tries to wait for you to say something first. when he notices that you in fact are not going to speak to him, he gets up and kneels in front of your sitting figure. puts his head on your lap and pouts, "baby please i'm sorry, you know i hate to see you like this" kisses as an apology, hands, legs, arms, face, every inch of you kissed as he praises you. his main priority is to comfort you before trying to smooth things over.

⟡ jaemin - has read the boyfriend manual

nobody can convince me that jaemin is not the prefect boyfriend. you are as shocked as he is when you hear those words come out of his mouth. immediately reaches for your hands and kisses them, "i don't know what came over me please i'm so sorry" you're just standing there looking at him wide eyed as he pulls you in for a hug, "please say something, what's on your mind, lets talk about this" gives you any space and time that you ask for, watches how your body reacts to his movements and his words to see what he should do next. is the most patient boyfriend in the world and is not afraid to open up and express why he said what he said and explain how he plans of fixing his mistakes. treats you like royalty all night and makes sure you're comfortable enough to open up to him.

⟡ chenle - will apologize for the next couple of days

chenle is a bit stubborn, will just sit there for a bit and chew on the inside cheek, he's more "actions speak louder than words." he'll get up and leave for a while, making you feel worse, but he'll come back with a chocolate bar you didn't even know you had. "eat this, it helps release serotonin or whatever" watches you as you silently take a bite, his heart literally hurts seeing you like this. you'd be the one to speak first but he cuts you off, cause he know he's the one that should be trying to say something and apologize. "i'm sorry, i know i act impulsively sometimes, let me make it up to you?" at the time you didn't know what he meant by that but as the week goes by and you start waking up to breakfast, receiving flowers at work, and having candy bars snuck into your bags with sappy notes, you know just how sorry chenle truly was.

⟡ jisung - nervous nervous nervous

he will like start to vibrate, don't know if it's all the regret in his body, or the need to say something, anything, to make his last comment go away. he will start to fidget and play with his fingers while trying to say something to you, "wait baby" "y/n" "are you upset" "is it what i said?" knows what he said hurt you but wants you to tell him so he can know exactly what went wrong. once you tell him he'll try to calm his nerves and apologize for what he said, would never intentionally say something to hurt you. takes him a second to grasp the situation since he likes for you to explain things clearly before he makes his next move, but he's a great listener so you don't mind, don't be afraid to rant.

#mark lee #renjun #jeno #haechan #jaemin #chenle #park jisung #nct #nct dream #nct imagines #request

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tyrantisterror · 2 days

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What are your top favorite fairy tales? Either classic literarily stories, adaptations of literary fairy tales, wholly modern fairy tales, or even just stories that you think are structured like fairy tales. (Roald Dahl books, Studio Ghibli movies, even Shrek and Puss in Boots movies, etc.)

That is an unfathomably vast genre of fiction to try and condense into a ranked numbered list. I think... I think that may be impossible to actually answer as requested. But I can ramble about some of my favorites I suppose.

Let's do this sorta like the Oscars and divide things into categories.

Category 1: The Heavy Hitters

Some fairy tales are significantly more famous than others, so this category is for them: the heavy hitters, the classic fairy tales that are most well known, as defined by my own nebulous perception of which fairy tales are more popular than others.

Of the heavy hitters, my favorites are Little Red Riding Hood and Jack and the Beanstalk. Little Red Riding Hood is such a spooky story no matter which telling you're looking at, and has contributed a lot to both the fantasy and horror genres thanks to its simple yet evocative premise and visuals. Jack and the Beanstalk, meanwhile, is just a really solid story of a trickster fool, which is one of my favorite archetypes in all of fiction. Love a good trickster fool.

Category 2: The Obscurities

As I said, this ask is covering a HUGE amount of fiction in its topic, especially since the border between a fairy tale and, like, ANY folklore isn't really well-defined (not in a way anyone can agree too, anyway). But there are a lot of obscure folktales I love that are at least sometimes lumped in as fairy tales, and I'm gonna list them here:

The Lambton Worm - a classic tale of dragon-slaying and getting fucked over by prophecies

The Lindworm Prince - queen can't concieve and consults a witch, ignores witch's directions, gives birth to human baby and dragon baby. Dragon baby grows up and demands a wife before human baby can get his, and a clever girl decides this is her chance to get rewarded for monster fucking.

Maud and the Dragon of Mordiford - the story of a girl who adopts a dragon only for it to end tragically, which inspired one of the novels I'm gonna write one of these days

Tam Lin - the story of a woman who wanted that elf dick and wasn't afraid to do some weird shit to get it

Biancabella and Samaritana - a story about a girl and her sister who is a snake because her mother had trouble concieving

King Odd - a story about an odd king who's actually an exiled fairy queen in disguise, and the man who wins her heart after surviving her attempt to execute him. It's like a Nordic medieval Tenchi Muyo.

You've probably noticed some themes about my favorites right now - lots of stories with dragons, people being transformed into monsters, and heroes who are into that monster shit.

Category 3: Archetypal Pieces

Ok, so for this I'm going to focus less on individual folktales and more on recurring plotlines, character types, and story beats, which you begin to notice the more you read up on Fairy Tales in part because many of the more obscure ones take beats from ones you're probably more familiar with and mix them together in new ways. So, my favorite plot beats in fairy tales:

Any sort of monster, obviously

The villain who literally removed their heart out of fear of being vulnerable

The baleful polymorph (i.e. a human who inhabits a beast/monster body against their will)

Monsterfucker protagonists

Trickster Fool protagonists

Disobedient Girls (examples: Little Red, Goldilocks), though I don't like how this archetype is treated

You want to have a baby and seek a witch and she gives you VERY SPECIFIC INSTRUCTIONS which you ignore because you really want this baby and oops you've got twins and one of them is some sort of monster good job asshole

The hero helps three (or more) people/creatures in need, and when shit hits the fan, they return the favor

Category 4: Modern(ish) Adaptations

Our penultimate category focuses on adaptations of fairy tales from, like, the 1900's on - anything made in a century I've lived in part of, basically. These arguably shouldn't be divided from "normal" fairy tales, but my brain regards them differently than, like, Victorian era fairy tale retellings, because hey, I lived in the age of these, more or less. They're "modern" for whatever nebulous definition of that word my brain's decided on.

And there's a lot for me to put in this category. Sleeping Beauty might be my favorite of Disney's fairy tale retellings, though Beauty and the Beast is a strong competitor for that role (and maybe Mulan, if we count its source material as a fairy tale, but I'm not sure we can). I think overall I like Sleeping Beauty's more stylized animation and character designs as well as its less conventional story-telling structure a bit more than B&B's, but Beauty and the Beast is still gorgeous and kind of perfectly scripted, so it's a tough competition.

My alltime favorite adaptation of fairy tales, though, would be Jim Henson's The Storyteller:

youtube

Using the magic of 1980's muppeteering, it adapts several fairy tales, many of which are more on the obscure side, and sometimes mashes a few different ones together to make sure each episode has a good three act structure. It's wonderful and fully captures the weirdness of fairy tales, while also having a lot of heart - The Heartless Giant is my favorite of the whole series.

Category 5: Works Inspired By Fairy Tales

I almost lumped the following stories into the above category, but while the division is, again, purely in my mind, there's something different about modern works that claim to adapt fairy tales 1:1 and ones that take fairy tale characters or concepts and throw them in entirely new tales with different directions, so that's what our final category will be.

I've gushed about Puss In Boots: The Last Wish enough that I don't think it'd surprise anyone that it would end up here - the same goes with the works of Rankin Bass, which is why I doubt anyone is surprised I'd put The Last Unicorn here too (technically based on a book, but it still fits the "has big fairy tale vibes despite not being based on one specific one" that I'm using to justify this category).

Pan's Labyrinth would also go in this category, with a protagonist who's both a trickster fool AND a disobedient girl, as well as a beautifully gothic take on fairy tale motifs. I'd put Company of Wolves here as well, being a very multifaceted riff on the Little Red Riding Hood story and a movie that sets both my analytical and creative parts of my brain on fire each time I want it.

I'd also put The Path, a short video game explicitly inspired by Company of Wolves, on this part of the favorites list. It's a game about, like, a DOZEN or so different takes on Red Riding Hood and her story, all with different flavors and subtext to analyze. It's unsettling but good.

Dimension 20 had a whole season focused on a horror-themed crossover of fairy tale characters called Neverafter that was fantastic, with one of the best riffs on Little Red Riding Hood I've ever seen, Puss in Boots and Pinocchio working together as con artists, and a vampire Snow White, so yeah 10/10 there, no notes.

And while I've only seen scattered bits of it, what I've seen of Rapunzel's Tangled Adventure, a sequel series to Disney's Rapunzel adaptation, is pretty great, though maybe I just think Cass is hot.

youtube

If you put an angry woman with a sword in your work of fiction I will at least stay for a few episodes to see what you do with her.

Given how much it consumed my brain in so little time, Revolutionary Girl Utena has to rank among my favorite Fairy Tale things ever - like, this is too chaotic a list to really rank things, but if I were to try, it'd at least be in the top 10. The same is true for Stephen Sondheim's Into the Woods, which in addition to being a big fun crossover between a bunch of the Heavy Hitter fairy tales, is also one of the best musicals ever written - and indeed, one of the best stage shows of all time.

Shit, where do I put A Midsummer Night's Dream? It feels like it should be here, but it predates the Brothers Grimm and Hans Christian Anderson, whose works my brain categorizes as "old fairy tales" rather than "modern fairy tale retellings." Well, it'd be somewhere among these categories, being one of the best tales with fairies in it ever told.

The Princess Bride would be up high like Utena no matter what - it's one of the best works of fiction about love that we've got. Same goes with Galavant, which I consider its spiritual successor, although I think one could argue Galavant isn't specifically a fairy tale pastiche and is more just a lampooning of fantasy in general.

Oh, and The Hazards of Love, a concept album by The Decemberists, should be here too. That's the last one I can think of right now, but I'm sure I'll think of a few others later that I like enough to regret not putting on here.

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siriuslysatorusimping · 18 hours

Text

Before I Love You - 2: Broken Lens (Gojo Satoru)

It's finally happening. I'm finally posting it. It's part 2 of Before I Love You. In all honesty, I've been writing this since I posted the first part, but I finally nailed it down. But, same as part 1, this is angst with a hopeful ending.

Summary:

“You were a shitty boyfriend.” A frown began to form on his face, but he stayed silent as she continued, “But you were always a good friend. Not surprised you’re a good teacher, too.” He had always been a good friend. Admittedly, he’d been a decent boyfriend before he cheated on her because he was supposedly afraid she was going to break up with him. But that wasn’t really the point. Despite everything, she knew for a fact he was never a bad person. Him caring about his students and their success didn’t surprise her at all, especially after finding out that he’d taken Megumi’s friend under his wing. His being shit at a relationship didn’t make him an inherently bad person. Even at her angriest, she’d never thought that about him. It was one reason she’d missed him so much after everything fell apart. *Also posted on AO3

Part 1 | Kiko's Masterlist

Broken Lens

2017

Her cousin fidgeted in her seat while they watched the game unfold.

“I feel fine,” the teen grumbled petulantly. “I could’ve played–”

“One more game isn’t the end of the world,” Rinko reminded, patting Mai’s knee. “Quit sulking, or I’m not buying you kakigōri after.”

Megumi snorted, rolling his eyes when Mai punched his shoulder.

“Maki’s doing fine,” he pointed out. “If you were out there, it wouldn’t be fair.”

A light tap on her shoulder caused her to turn, her eyebrows rising at the sight of Gojo smiling at her hesitantly. She hadn’t seen him in weeks, not since the day she’d agreed to hear him out. Even though he’d asked if he could sit with her at the soccer game, she hadn’t been surprised when he didn’t show. Part of her assumed she wouldn’t see him again once he realized his apology hadn’t worked like he thought.

“Hey,” he greeted, stuffing his hands in his pockets. “I, uh, had a few things come up for the last couple games. I know– we didn’t make plans or anything, but I– still felt bad because I said I might– but yeah. I– I heard they were good games?”

Mai crossed her arms as she released a frustrated puff of air. They’d both been losses, but closer than they would have been without Maki as the goalie. Rinko flicked her ear.

“Last warning about that pout,” she informed her. Turning back to Gojo, she shrugged. “We didn’t make any plans to meet. You have a life.”

“I also didn’t wanna seem like I’m stalking you,” he joked, rubbing the back of his neck. He pointed to the seat next to her, the question clear in his eyes. “Is it okay if–?”

She shrugged again, scooting closer to Mai to give him room to sit without being too close.

“Hi, Gojo-sensei,” the teen greeted, leaning around Rinko.

“Hey,” he replied, giving her a giant grin. “How’s the ankle?”

His question brought the pout back to her face, her nose scrunching petulantly.

“It’s fine,” she claimed, rolling it a few times. “But–”

“Still tender.” Rinko tucked a stray hair behind her cousin’s ear. “She still has a limp when she tries to run, so she’s sitting one last game out to be safe.”

“I’m fine,” Mai denied, dropping her head back and sighing dramatically. “Doesn’t even hurt–”

“Because you totally weren’t hobbling like a penguin after you tried practicing last week,” Megumi interjected, snickering.

“Shut it!” Mai hissed, elbowing him. “You’re such a jerk. Why are you even here?”

“Because I’m not leaving him alone at my apartment just so you don’t have to deal with him,” Rinko stated drily, sighing at the teens’ bickering.

She’d agreed to let Megumi stay with her while his parents were out of town on an anniversary trip to celebrate their first year of marriage. His step-sister had opted to stay with a friend instead, which she understood since the girl still didn’t really know her yet.

At least Toji and his wife seemed happy. She never thought she’d see him find someone after how devastated he’d been after Megumi’s mom died. Even he had said he couldn’t see himself with anyone else and that his one-year-old son was more than enough to keep his schedule and heart full. But when he’d met his current wife, his tune had slowly begun to change, and Rinko had cackled at the heart-eyed looks he sent in the pretty woman’s direction whenever he saw her.

So, listening to the teenagers argue was a small price to see her broody cousin so happy for the first time in almost thirteen years.

But that didn’t stop her from leveling both of them with a warning glare. They shrank away, and she raised her eyebrows when they each mumbled that the other started it. Sometimes she could swear that Mai and Megumi were siblings with how much they fought.

“They act like siblings,” Gojo mused, practically echoing her own thoughts, and she turned her head to see him watching the exchange in amusement.

“Hardly,” Megumi snapped, rolling his eyes. “She wishes she had a brother as great as me–”

He yelped when Rinko reached around Mai and grabbed his ear, yanking on it.

“Last warning,” she warned firmly before looking back at Gojo. “Cousin’s kid. Toji’s.”

She doubted he remembered Toji since he’d only met him once, very briefly, before they even dated, but she was surprised when he nodded in understanding.

“Big guy, yeah?” he asked. “Paramedic?”

She blinked at him slowly as she wondered how the hell he remembered that.

“Yeah,” she confirmed, clearing her throat.

Their attention moved back to the field when they heard yelling, watching as the ball flew just past Maki’s fingertips.

“Shit!”

Her eyes snapped to Mai’s face as the girl swore, narrowing when she rolled her own.

“It’s normal, Rinko,” she argued. “You can’t tell me you never swore when you were my age.”

“Have you met my mom?” she asked incredulously. “Try that in front of your Aunt Yuzuki next time you see her and see what happens.”

The woman almost never failed to flick her nose or ear hard if she heard her swear. Especially if the words slipped in the bakery.

“Aunt Yuzu would never be upset with me,” Mai stated smugly, and Rinko had to admit that, in most cases, the girl was right. “Or Maki. She loves us too much.”

“She loves my dad, too,” Megumi said, frowning as he watched the ball change possession over and over. “But he says Aunt Yuzu can be pretty scary. He tries not to swear around her.”

True. The first time he had in front of her mother had resulted in the mountain of a man yelping like a small child as the small woman pinched his ear.

“You won’t use that language in my bakery,” she’d ordered, yanking him down to her height so she could glare into his eyes. “Do you hear me, Toji? Absolutely not.”

Her mother was truly a force to be reckoned with when she wanted to be.

“Always liked your mom,” Gojo murmured, giving her a sad smile. “Guessing she’s probably not my biggest fan anymore, though.”

Not exactly, especially since Rinko had burst into the bakery through the back entrance with tears streaming down her face just hours after she and Gojo broke up. The questions of why she wasn’t enough had spilled out before she could stop them, a broken record of grief finally consuming her at the loss of not only her relationship, but also one of her best friends. Her mother had closed the shop early and sat with her, holding her tight as she let herself fall apart.

No, admittedly, Gojo Satoru was one of Kurisaki Yuzuki’s least favorite people.

“You rank higher than Naoya,” she offered quietly, watching him grimace at the mention of her half-brother. There was no point in lying to spare his feelings. “But- that’s probably about it.”

“Fair,” he muttered, running his hand through his hair. “Much as I hate it. Fair.”

2011

“Mom!” she croaked as she slammed the door open, unable to force herself to care about making a scene. It couldn’t be too busy. The holiday rush was over.

“Mom, I need you!”

Yuzuki’s concerned face peeked around the corner from the front, her expression dropping at the sight of her.

“Darling?” she asked, her eyes filling with concern. “Sweetheart, I thought you were in Tokyo–”

She shook her head, the sobs breaking free as she collapsed forward.

“He– Mom, I–”

She felt her mother’s arms around her, pulling her up and ushering her into the small office. Gentle hands pushed her to sit down in the old chair behind the desk.

“I’ll be right back, darling,” Yuzuki murmured, squeezing her. “Just let me close the shop.”

The familiar sense of guilt clawed up her throat, but for once, she found it easy to shove away. She just wanted her mom to hold her and tell her she would be okay. She wanted someone to choose her for once. Even if her mother was the only person who ever would.

Lost in her own mind, she barely noticed her mother slip back into the room. She stood when prompted before crawling onto the woman’s lap, curling in on herself. Burrowing into the comforting embrace, she made no effort to stifle the guttural sobs. A sharp ache had spread through her body, starting in her chest, and she gasped for breath. She swore her lungs would give out.

“Tell me what happened,” her mother whispered, her hand rubbing her back. “What happened, my gem?”

Her jaw trembled as she lifted her head, the words spilling from her as she explained in broken whispers. Forcing herself to vocalize the harsh reality that had all but slapped her in the face the previous evening—to admit that she’d been a fool. The fact that she’d allowed herself to be lied to. That she’d been stupid enough to believe he wanted her.

“Mom,” she choked, her chest aching. “I wanted to believe– I thought that I– why am I not enough?”

The question that sat in the back of her mind her entire life. The question of why she’d never been enough. Why her father chose to discard her before she was even born. Why he had spent the entirety of her adolescence calling her a mistake.

She’d been able to shove the questions down. Ignore them. Pretend that it didn’t matter because things were going well. Because her father had decided she was worth his time. Because she had a boyfriend who cared about her. Had chosen her.

She’d let herself believe she was enough.

Life was quick to remind her that despite what she might think, she would always just be an unwanted mistake. To remind her that in the end, she would be discarded and forgotten.

“You are enough, my gem,” Yuzuki murmured, running her fingers through her hair. “More than enough. You are my most wonderful blessing. And just because someone else doesn’t see your worth does not mean that you are any less.” She wiped her tears, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “Do not let someone else’s broken lens distort your view of yourself.”

“It hurts, Mom,” she cried. She clutched her chest, desperately wishing she could reach inside and rip out whatever was causing the excruciating pain. “Why does it hurt so much? Why won’t it go away?”

“Because you’re heartbroken, darling,” her mother replied sadly. “I know it hurts. I know it does. And I wish I could take it away from you so you didn’t have to feel this way. But it will go away. Just give yourself time.”

2017

They watched as Maki dove to stop the ball, her fingertips catching it just in time to stop it from going in. As she threw it back into play, Mai’s breath hitched, stress clear on her face as she watched her twin play.

“Deep breaths,” Rinko urged, rubbing her back. “I know you want to be out there.”

Maki wanted her there, too. They both played better when the other was on the field with them. The pouts she received that morning as they complained were more evidence of how much they relied on each other.

“If we lose, Maki’s gonna blame herself,” Mai mumbled, a deep frown causing her forehead to crease. “And it’s not her fault–”

“Not yours, either,” Megumi cut her off. “The team’s gotta be able to win without you sometimes.”

There was the almost scarily mature kid Rinko knew and absolutely adored.

“Plus,” he continued, shrugging, “you wouldn’t play well with a limp, anyway. Then you’d both be blaming yourselves, and you’d probably get hurt again, too.”

“Smart kid,” Gojo noted quietly as Mai let out a reluctant sigh and leaned her head on Megumi’s shoulder. The latter flinched but said nothing else. “How much time has he spent with you?”

A lot, especially since the twins had basically moved in. She hadn’t realized when she moved to Tokyo that she’d end up being the twins’ safe haven, too. It started when the twins begged her to come to their soccer games. Then, they begged her to let them stay the night with her after. From there, they just started showing up any time their parents fought, or they didn’t want to go home.

At this point, they spent more time at her apartment than with their own parents. She kept them safe, fed, and made sure they did their homework, so Ogi stayed off her back. It helped that her father had had a talk with his younger brother.

She’d already spent a lot of time with Megumi and Toji. He’d needed someone to keep an eye on the kid occasionally while he worked, which had been a small motivator for her moving in the first place. He couldn’t take the kid in the ambulance with him, but Rinko’s manager didn’t care if he sat in the breakroom and read a book.

And ate her damn cookies.

Either way, the twins showing up on her doorstep often meant that they spent more time with Megumi and Toji than their father ever intended. It also meant they got to have a cousin closer to their age.

They’d grown close, even if they wouldn’t admit it aloud. The kind of cousins Rinko had wished for when she was their age. While she and Toji had gotten along, their age gap had prevented them from being too close since he’d been married and had Megumi by the time she reached her teens. But he and his first wife had been safe people for her when she had to spend time with her father’s family growing up, and now, she could do the same for the twins. At the very least, she was someone who supported them when it came to chasing their passion.

Mai screamed, startling Rinko from her thoughts in time to see Miwa Kasumi score.

“Let’s fu– GO!” Mai screeched wildly, startling a few people around them. “MIWAA!”

Her heart swelled, watching the teen’s eyes light up excitedly while she cheered for her friend. She needed to see that the entire team didn’t rest on her and Maki’s shoulders.

“Looks like we might have a game on our hands,” Gojo noted. “Miwa is one of the students who asked me to come to that game a few weeks ago. Good kid. Seems a bit ditzy sometimes, but she’s actually really smart.”

Rinko turned to see him grinning at the field, pride clear in his expression. He waved back when the teen acknowledged him after she’d waved at Mai, a clear blush creeping up her neck as she quickly sprinted to rejoin the game.

“Miwa has a crush on Gojo-sensei,” Mai whispered loudly, smirking.

Not surprising. She imagined that most of his students probably had a crush on him. He’d always been one to attract that kind of attention. All he had to do was flash a smile and bat his pretty eyes, and people would turn into mush before him.

She hadn’t been immune to it, either.

“That’s not–” Gojo’s ears turned pink, and he pushed his shades up. “I mean, I don’t encourage– I just wanna support–”

“We know, sensei,” Mai snickered. “Miwa only asked you to come because we’d heard you went to the baseball game to support Muta-senpai and Kamo-senpai. You’re one of the only teachers who will show up. Sorry if I made you uncomfortable.”

His ears went a shade darker as he cleared his throat uncomfortably. He gave Rinko a sheepish smile when Mai’s attention moved back to the game.

“I– I didn’t ask her to– say any of that.” He rubbed the back of his neck as he muttered. “I promise I’m not–”

“You were a shitty boyfriend,” she cut him off, speaking quietly so the kids wouldn’t hear. A frown began to form on his face, but he stayed silent as she continued, “But you were always a good friend. Not surprised you’re a good teacher, too.”

He had always been a good friend. Admittedly, he’d been a decent boyfriend before he cheated on her because he was supposedly afraid she was going to break up with him. But that wasn’t really the point. Despite everything, she knew for a fact he was never a bad person. Him caring about his students and their success didn’t surprise her at all, especially after finding out that he’d taken Megumi’s friend under his wing.

His being shit at a relationship didn’t make him an inherently bad person. Even at her angriest, she’d never thought that about him. It was one reason she’d missed him so much after everything fell apart.

A small, hesitant smile overtook the frown, and he nodded slightly.

“I– I try to be,” he murmured, moving his gaze back to the field. “Just– wanna be a good influence for ‘em. And I– yeah. I try to be a good teacher. Worked on– a few things over the years. For– me. Like to think I’m better than I was in college.”

2011

“You need to sleep.”

She nodded absently as she stared down at her notes, her bottom lip firmly between her teeth while she tried to commit the definitions for endomysium and perimysium and epimysium to heart.

“Rinko-chan.” Gojo’s upside-down face crowded her vision when he leaned over her from behind, his eyes boring into hers. “I saw you sitting here twelve hours ago and you look like you haven’t moved once. Have you eaten today?”

She blinked slowly, letting his words sink in. Twelve hours? Impossible. She’d sat down in the little study nook maybe an hour ago. Glancing at the clock on the wall, she scowled when she saw he was right, she’d been there all day.

Finals were going to kill her.

“Take that look as a ‘no,’” Gojo concluded, closing her books and pulling her to her feet. “You’re not gonna learn that shit by staring at it until you go blind.”

“Not how that works,” she countered, rolling her tired eyes. “Gojo, I need to–”

“When was the last time you ate?” he asked sternly, his eyes narrowing at her when she shrugged. “Thought so.”

“I need to–”

“Eat,” he snapped, shoving her things in her backpack and heaving it over his shoulder. “And sleep.” He grabbed her wrist and began dragging her out of the library. “You’re as hopeless as Shoko sometimes. You won’t pass except out during your exams if you keep this up.”

While he had a point, it seemed rich coming from someone who had a near-photographic memory.

“You don’t even have to study,” she whined petulantly, leaning onto him as his arm wrapped around her waist. “S’not fair, ya know. The rest of us have to cram–”

“You’re smarter than you think,” he argued, rolling his eyes. “You’re gonna be fine. But only if you don’t starve yourself first. Crazy to me that someone who loves food so fuckin much would go so long without it like this.”

As they exited the library into the cool night air, her stomach growled.

“Can we–”

“Ramen, yeah,” he cut her off, grinning when she perked up. “That place you love so much that’s open late? The others said they’d meet us there once I dragged you outta your little study cave.”

2017

Warmth and excitement swirled in Rinko’s chest as she stood on the platform, the twins bouncing excitedly beside her.

Right on time, the train came to a stop, passengers slowly exiting to the sound of the monotone automated voice thanking them for trusting them with their travels.

“I see her!” Maki exclaimed.

Her mother emerged swiftly, a grin on her face, her bag over her shoulder, and her eyes searching for them through the crowd of people.

“Aunt Yuzu!”

The twins darted forward, almost tackling her to the ground.

“My sweet girls!” Yuzuki cried happily. “It’s so good to see you, dears.”

Rinko couldn’t keep the smile from her own face as they approached.

“How was the trip?” she asked, taking her mother’s bag and slinging it over her own shoulder. “No issues?”

“None at all,” the woman replied, releasing the twins and enveloping her in a tight hug. “Hi, my gem.”

“Hi, Mom,” she murmured, relaxing into her embrace. No matter how much time passed, her mother would always be home for her. “It’s good to see you.”

Yuzuki tucked a strand of hair behind Rinko’s ear as she leaned away, her hand resting on her cheek while her sharp eyes assessed her.

“It’s good to see you, too, my gem. You look well.”

“Thanks for coming all this way.”

“Anything for my most wonderful blessing,” her mother hummed, turning back to the twins. “And my favorite girls!” She squeezed them tightly. “Are my little bakers ready for this weekend?”

“Of course,” Maki replied as they led the way out of the station.

“Thanks to you, the soccer team’s booth will be everyone’s favorite!” Mai gushed. “No one else stands a chance.”

“It’s not actually a competition,” Rinko called. “And this isn’t an excuse for the two of you to just eat your weight in cookies, either.”

“Don’t worry,” Maki replied, turning to walk backward. “We’ll only eat half our weight!”

Yuzuki snickered, meeting Rinko’s eyes briefly.

“Oh, my gem, you’ve taught them so well.”

The twins flit around her kitchen, following her mother’s instructions while they prepared enough cookies to feed armies.

“You’re doing wonderful,” Yuzuki praised, watching Mai mix the dough for the matcha cookies.

Maki retrieved a pan from the oven, an excited grin on her face as she picked up a miso peanut butter cookie from the tray and took a large bite.

“At least wait until after dinner,” Rinko scolded lightly, sighing when Mai grabbed a cookie as well. “Or not.”

“They’re too good not to eat at least one while they’re fresh,” Maki argued, huffing slightly when she burned her tongue. “You’re coming by tomorrow, right? Both of you?”

“Of course,” Yuzuki replied. “I wouldn’t miss getting to see you celebrating all this hard work.”

“Before I go to work,” Rinko confirmed. She couldn’t take another day off after she’d taken the entire weekend so she could be home to help with the baking. “I’ll be there.”

“You should give Gojo-sensei some cookies!” Mai exclaimed with her mouth full. “Miwa says he’s got a pretty big sweet tooth.”

Rinko tensed, avoiding her mother’s questioning eyes as she narrowed her own at Mai. She hadn’t mentioned Gojo to her mother, and she’d hoped that he would never come up in the conversation, but she knew better. The chances of her mother not running into him at the festival tomorrow were slim, especially since he would check the twins’ booth at Miwa’s request.

“I don’t see why I would–”

“Because he always sits with you at our soccer games,” Maki interjected, grinning widely as she addressed Yuzuki. “One of the teachers at our school has a huge crush on Rinko.”

“Huge,” Mai agreed dramatically. “You should see the way he looks at her–”

“That’s enough,” Rinko ordered. She pinched the bridge of her nose. “We’re not talking about this.”

The twins didn’t know the extent of her history with Gojo, and she had no intention of telling them, either. They didn’t need their image of him shattered. But they noticed that Gojo had started attending their games more often and always chose to sit with her, and they refused to let it go.

“But–”

“I’m not giving your teacher cookies,” Rinko snapped, clenching her jaw. The twins deflated slightly at her tone, and she released a heavy sigh. “I can’t be there long, anyway. I’ll only have time to drop by your booth before I have to get to work.”

Her mother hummed quietly while they cleaned her kitchen after their baking marathon.

The twins were fast asleep on their futons in the living room, their quiet snores telling Rinko how exhausted they truly were.

“So,” Yuzuki began, side-eyeing her carefully, “Gojo Satoru is a teacher now, hm?”

Rinko sighed, she knew this was coming.

“Apparently,” she replied hesitantly. “Ran into him at one of their games a few months ago.” She waited for her mother to speak, fidgeting uncomfortably with the sponge in her hands. “Look, I know what you’re gonna say–”

“I don’t tell you how to live your life,” Yuzuki stated calmly. “Or who to spend your time with. You’re an adult–”

“I’m not getting back together with him.” Finally meeting her mother’s eyes, Rinko silently pleaded with her to understand. “I’m not. This isn’t– he wanted to apologize when he saw me, but he knows that it doesn’t erase what happened. He sits beside me sometimes at their soccer games, but it’s nothing more than that. I just–”

“You’ve missed your friend,” her mother whispered, giving her a sad smile. “I know, sweetheart. He was your friend first before everything happened. Just– I’m so proud of the woman you’ve grown into over the years, and I just– I worry about you spending time with someone who hurt you so deeply. I don’t ever want anyone to make you question your worth like that ever again.”

Rinko couldn’t blame her mother for her concern. Not after the countless quiet mornings they’d spent in the bakery together, where her mother helped her learn how to mend her broken heart. The too-early hours when they giggled and joked as they prepared to open the bakery, the late nights where she sobbed uncontrollably in her mother’s arms when it became too much. When she slowly began finding herself and who she wanted to be. Those moments that had cemented themselves as some of her most favorite memories. Some of the best and worst times of her life. She learned about herself, learned about her mother, and they’d grown so much closer because of it.

Yuzuki released a deep sigh, wrapping her arms around her and tucking her hair behind her ear.

“It would make me a hypocrite to tell you that you’re wrong for allowing him a chance to apologize,” she mused. “Since I convinced you to give your father a chance to make things right, and that ended up being for the better. Just– just make sure that your lens stays intact, my gem.”

“I will, Mom,” she promised, leaning her head on her shoulder. “I know who I am now. I won’t let someone else change that again.”

It had taken her a long time, but she’d finally realized that the way others treated her wasn’t her fault. The way her father discarded her when she was a child wasn’t on her. The fact that Gojo had been too much of a coward to talk to her instead of seeking out someone else to boost his own ego hadn’t been on her.

Not only that, but if she really thought about it, she hadn’t been ready for that relationship, either—not really. They’d both still had so much growing up left to do.

She could almost say she was grateful because she’d been forced to dig deep and, in her mother’s words, repair her lens.

The trouble now was making sure she didn’t let someone else crack it again.

2012

“Pass me the bench scraper, darling.”

She pursed her lips and handed her mother the tool, watching as she expertly sliced the cookies from the cold log of dough.

Working in the bakery more often had served as a great distraction. Helping out during a rush was never the same as the relaxed early mornings they had before they opened. She’d come to look forward to the quiet moments again. The pot of hot tea soothed her mind as she sipped idly, listening to the consistent thud of her mother cutting the cookie dough.

“How was dinner with your father?” Yuzuki asked, her gentle voice melding with the methodical tapping as she cut the butter cookies.

Dinner with her father had become a monthly occurrence. He’d agreed to take turns between Tokyo and Kyoto, and the previous weekend had once again been her turn to travel. She’d finally reached the point where the train ride didn’t feel like she was ripping her chest open with the memory of that first dinner months ago.

“Not so bad,” she admitted reluctantly. “Naoya’s still a little shit — I won’t change my opinion on that — but Naobito can be… tolerable, I guess.”

“Well,” Yuzuki grinned mischievously as she spoke, wiping a bit of flour on her nose. “Noaya has always been a little shit, darling.”

“Mom,” she gasped dramatically, grabbing a towel and cleaning her face. “I can’t believe you’d use that language in your bakery!”

They dissolved into giggles, completely ignoring that she had sworn first.

When they finally calmed down, their chests heaving as they caught their breath, she leaned her head on her mother’s shoulder. An overwhelming warmth filled her chest when her mother’s arms wrapped around her, squeezing lightly.

It was almost five in the morning. They would be opening in a little over an hour, and the scent of fresh bread had already begun to fill the air. Her stomach growled at the thought of the croissants her mother would half-heartedly scold her for swiping. She couldn’t think of anywhere she’d rather be than right here.

“Hey, Mom?”

“Hm?” Yuzuki ran her fingers through Rinko’s hair, giggling again when her face scrunched at the streaks of flour left behind. “Yes, my gem?”

“I love you,” Rinko replied quietly, hugging her tight. “I dunno what I’d do without you.”

“I love you too, sweetheart,” her mother hummed in response, her grin softening. “And I hope you never have to find out.”

2017

Satoru took a deep breath, forcing his legs to keep walking as he approached the booth set up by the girl’s soccer team.

His students mentioned that the Zenin twins brought enough cookies to feed the entire school, and he knew that likely meant that they’d gotten some help. With how close the two were to Rinko, there was only one person who made sense to help them make upwards of ten dozen cookies. A familiar scent filled his nose, and his chest tightened at the sight of a woman he hadn’t seen in almost six years.

“Gojo-sensei!” Miwa Kasumi exclaimed. “You made it! What do you think of our booth?”

“Looks great,” he replied honestly, nodding toward the decorations. His eyes didn’t stray from the woman who turned slowly to give him a skeptical look. “Did a great job. And everyone’s talkin’ about the sweets you’ve got, too.”

“Gojo Satoru.” Kurisaki Yuzuki stared at him, a strained smile on her face as her eyes seemed to stare straight through him.

He saw no sign of Rinko, which likely meant she was at work. She wouldn’t miss something like this for the twins.

“Kurisaki-sama,” he greeted, shoving his hands in his pockets. “When my students said that the Zenin twins brought cookies, I figured you had to have something to do with it.”

“Oh, they did all the hard work,” Yuzuki replied. She crossed her arms. “My daughter, too. I assume you’ll want some of the caramel miso butter cookies? Those were your favorite if I remember correctly.”

“Yeah.” He nodded. “It’s, uh, it’s good to see you–”

“Gojo-sensei,” Mai interjected, holding a bag of cookies out for him. “My cousin asked me to–”

“Mai,” Yuzuki cut her off, her gaze turning sharp. “Don’t lie to your teacher.”

The girl flinched, pouting at the woman dramatically.

“Fine,” she mumbled, shoving the cookies toward him anyway. “Here are your cookies, Gojo-sensei.”

He picked them up awkwardly, clearing his throat as he summoned the courage to speak again.

“Thanks,” he managed, meeting Yuzuki’s eyes again. “I– how’s the bakery doing?”

“You know about the bakery, Gojo-sensei?” Miwa asked, her eyes widening.

“I went to school in Kyoto,” he informed the teen, knowing he was digging a hole for himself. He doubted the twins knew he and Rinko had dated, and he hoped they didn’t know that he’d fucked up so catastrophically with her. “Kurisaki-sama’s bakery is close to campus, and–”

“And his friend group overlapped with my daughter’s,” Yuzuki finished lightly. “My bakery is doing great, Satoru. Thank you for asking. I heard that you’ve been attending my girls’ soccer games lately.”

It was entirely possible that he imagined the threat in her tone, but he knew better.

“Yeah,” he admitted, rubbing the back of his head. “It’s been nice getting to catch up with Rinko, too. Great getting to see an old friend.”

Yuzuki’s eyes narrowed, and he took a deep breath.

“I, uh, you really like tea, right?” he asked. “The volleyball team set up a tea shop as their booth. I could show you?”

Part of him hoped she’d refuse, but he knew that would be the coward’s way out. He had to face her and let her know that he understood the weight of his mistakes. Even though he knew that she would likely never forgive him, he needed to do the right thing. On top of that, he needed to quit deluding himself with the hope that apologizing to Rinko —and her mother— would somehow earn him a second chance he knew he didn’t deserve. But that didn’t change that he needed to apologize because it was the right thing to do. Face his fears and own up to his actions.

“That’d be lovely,” Yuzuki agreed. “I’ll be back in a bit, girls.”

She didn’t speak again as they sat down, her mouth set in a frown while she watched him carefully. The silence unnerved him, and he ran his hand through his hair as their tea was placed in front of them.

“I can’t imagine what you think I might want to hear from you, Satoru,” she remarked after she’d taken a sip.

“For one, I thought you might want to– I could tell you were holding back in front of the twins, so I wanted to give you the chance to– I know you probably have some choice words for me–”

“‘Choice words’ would be an understatement,” Yuzuki cut him off. Her glare felt like it would burn him alive. “You deserve much worse than choice words after what you did. The fact that you have the audacity to sit across from me so casually is truly astounding.”

He felt anything but casual while he fought the instinct to get out as fast as possible.

“You were one of her best friends,” Yuzuki continued. “Do you understand what that meant? Do you understand how badly you hurt her? You didn’t just break her heart, you betrayed her trust as her friend, too. She trusted you, Satoru. She let herself believe in you, and you proved yourself completely unworthy of that trust.”

Of course he knew. He’d lost one of his best friends. His selfishness had cost him one of his favorite people in the world, something he’d felt in his soul the moment he’d seen her with her father that night in the restaurant. When he’d felt his chest ache at the sight of her the next morning, clearly trying not to let him see her cry and his world really crashed down around him.

“-or was that the mistake? Me?”

No, she wasn’t the mistake. The mistake had been doubting her for even a second, and he’d regretted it from the moment he’d realized what he’d done. He’d thought that her visiting Tokyo without telling him had confirmed his fears. Thought that it proved she was going to break up with him until he got home to find her bag in his room. He still remembered the guilt choking him when his mother told him she’d been planning on surprising him until something came up.

He’d been too much of a coward to admit to his mother that the something was him being a fucking idiot and ruining everything.

“I– I know that words will never make up for what I did,” he finally whispered, staring at the table. “But I am sorry that I hurt her, for how I hurt her. It’s still one of my biggest regrets.”

Yuzuki said nothing, and he took a slow sip of his tea while he waited for her to speak. He didn’t expect her to believe him, but at least he’d said his peace.

She set her tea back down, her quiet sigh reaching his ears.

“You’ve obviously grown quite a bit since the last time I saw you,” she began carefully. “I can tell that you’re sincere in your apology, too.” She took a deep breath. “But I don’t forgive you, Satoru.”

He nodded, lifting his eyes to hers again.

“I know,” he admitted, still feeling his heart sink in his chest at her words. He did know she wouldn’t forgive him, but it didn’t make it any easier to hear. “I just– I wanted to do the right thing, even if it’s too late. She– both of you– deserve that much after what I did.”

“I don’t need anything from you,” she replied evenly, crossing her arms. “But I can appreciate the effort, I suppose.” She narrowed her eyes at him. “What is it that you want from me?”

“You’ve already given it,” he told her, letting his shoulders sag. “You listened. I don’t– you’ve already given more than I expected, honestly. I’m– I can be content just knowing that I at least apologized and took responsibility for what I did.”

He wanted another chance with Rinko, but he knew that wasn’t something Yuzuki could even offer. He also knew that he didn’t deserve it anyway. He had to be okay with knowing there were some mistakes that couldn’t be fixed.

“I can’t control my daughter, nor do I try to.” Yuzuki released a heavy sigh. “She’s capable of making her own decisions and knowing how to take care of herself. I can respect that she’s allowed you to have a small space in her life again. But know this, Satoru-” she leaned forward, her eyes boring into his- “if you ever break her heart again in any way, I will send Toji after you.”

From the look in her eye, he knew that Toji would be the least of his worries.

AN: I hope this sheds just a bit of light on Gojo's mindset, how Rinko dealt with things, and how much she's grown as a person. While Gojo fucked up BIG TIME, his mistake years ago doesn't mean he's a bad person, and it also doesn't mean he was a bad person then, either. People make mistakes. They do things they shouldn't, and sometimes those things are worse than others. But it's how they react afterward that matters. It's important that he's facing his mistakes and owning up to them, even though he knows that doesn't mean he'll have another chance with Rinko.

I might post an author discussion about this story because I have so many thoughts about how I want it to develop if I continue it. I'd also kinda like to discuss the overall theme of the story, which is really self-discovery and healing. We'd be following Rinko's journey to learning to love herself no matter what happens.

#gojo satoru x original female character #gojo x reader #gojo and rinko #gojo angst #gojo and rinko angst #goinko angst #goinko au #before i love you #gojo satoru fanfic #gojo fanfic #gojo satoru #jujutsu gojo #jjk fanfic #gojo satoru angst #jjk angst

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