#been mia for a while wanted to come back for this special occasion | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

tillthelandslide · 1 year

Text

Insufferable Arsehole Part 8: When We Are Together - Matty Healy Series

A/N: sooo you may have seen my poll, you may not have, but I've come to the decision to post what I have written for this series and then take a little break from it... I love this series but recently have been feeling a bit stuck with it, I have so many ideas but I'm sure where they fit and whether there even is an end to this story. My goal is to eventually finish it so don't worry! I hope you guys are okay with that. The support has been amazing so thank you all so much.

In other news (for my Ross girlies) I will be posting the first chapter to my new series, entitled Pressure, very soon!

Warnings: bit long, probably spelling mistakes

Series Masterlist

Part 7

Lou's phone ringing on her bedside table is what stirs her from her peaceful slumber. The dozing man next to her awakens with a groan as she awkwardly untangles her limbs from him, apologising for the loud interference as she removes herself from the bed. His soft features find hers and he smiles before his eyes are drifting shut once more. She quickly throws on his shirt which rests on the ground amongst the rest of their clothes.

She stubs her toe on the bedside table as she grabs her phone, the name "Rose" lights up her screen, a picture of her and the drummer of her band can be seen.

"Fuck" she says attempting to shake of the pain, Matty mumbles a "you alright love?" His face now buried in his pillow.

"Yeah go back to sleep" she says, answering the phone, covering up the speaker until she's on their balcony. The morning breeze is far too cold and considering she's just wearing Matty's Tshirt, she'd be surprised if she didn't get frostbite.

"Lou, are you there?" She hears her friend say.

"Yes I'm here sorry" she looks at her phone seeing the clock said 5am, she puts the phone back to her ear

"Rose I love you but it's 5 in the morning, what time is it there?" She asks, not keeping a track of what time it is in her home town like she usually would.

"That doesn't matter, what matters is that I've just seen pictures of you and Matty holding hands and cuddling. Last time we spoke you said you're seeing how things go" she explains. Shit they did get caught she thinks , it's fine Matty said we will deal with the consequences together.

"That's exactly what I'm doing, Rose. Seeing how things go, I'm not filtering myself for anyone, I'll do what I want and that's exactly what Im doing" she explains. Rose chuckles on the other end of the line, Lou's words perfectly described herself, never one to filter herself for the sake of others.

"We respect that, you know we do. One of the things we love most about you... We're just worried you're going to get hurt" Rose explains, Rose was one of the most genuine people she had ever met, she was similar to Hann in the fact she would say it how it is although perhaps a little more carelessly and sometimes brutally than Hann.

"We? So you've spoken to Mia and Cami too... Great'' she says, eyes rolling. Mia was the band's bassist (and her sister) and Cami was their lead guitarist.

"I mean... Mia is blindly happy for you, you know what she's like" Rose says.

Mia is around 5 years younger than Lou (having joined the band reasonably late, a fact that Ross and Lou had jokingly argued about as the band didn't have a bassist for a while), they had always been close but one thing they loved about their relationship was they weren't dependent on each other. Despite spending all her time with the 1975 in her childhood, only George had met her band members, they weren't very interested in becoming friends with them, far too happy in doing their own thing.

Mia lived in London for almost all of their childhood, they'd only see each other during holidays or special occasions, something about that dynamic made them closer (which most people found odd). Mia had played bass since she was around 8 and she had joined the band 5 years after they got famous.

"I love her... She's my sister and all but she'd be happy if I found a penny on the floor" Lou says making Rose chuckle, knowing it was true. Despite having different Mum's, their families always encouraged the sisters to appreciate life intricacies, the small things.

"We're just looking out for you L" she says, the nickname only her band members gave her. She remembers the first time George visited the band on tour during one of the 75s breaks, he practically cringed at the nickname, she was and always would be his "Lou" and the fact others had different nicknames for her didn't sit too well at first.

"I know" she says, knowing they never did anything with less than pure intentions. "but listen... We're a family here, if anything happens they'll protect me" she says, not that she needed protecting. Rose finds her heart sinking slightly at her friend's words, as if their own band weren't a family. But she saw the way Lou was with the 75, how undoubtedly happy she was and she knew to push the selfish thought down.

"You seem really happy" Rose finally says and Lou smiles at that.

"I am..." She can't help but smile widely. She could easily go on to tell Rose how she's having the time of her life, how she's never felt this happy, how something feels different with the guys (something she has been struggling to explain), how Matty makes her feel seen and loved (something no guy has come close to before). But she doesn't, wanting it to be her secret for now.

"I'm also really fucking cold right now" she laughs, goosebumps rising to her skin as the wind makes Matty's shirt blow around her.

"Why?" Rose is laughing at her then.

"I'm on a balcony"

"why?" She's asking again, the two of them laughing.

"Matty's asleep... Like I said it's 5am" she says and she hears her friend sigh on the other end of the line, a happy sigh.

"Matty aye? Sharing a room are you?"

"Shut up" she chuckles. Her voice lowers and she whispers her next words "he told me he loved me Rose".

"Wow. That's big" she says and Lou's nodding even though Rose can't see her.

"Do you love him?" Rose asks, already suspecting the answer.

"Yeah"

"Well shit... Guess we're coming to the next show then. Got to see what Matthew Healy is like nowadays. Can't be the same old Ratty you used to kick about with" she says making Lou laugh loudly.

"I miss you guys" she says, the 1975 were her family, everything was intense. But with her own band she had fun (not that she didn't with the boys) but it was different.

"Is George still as fit as the good old days?" She asks and Lou can't help but laugh again.

"Pack it in, you know he's in a happy, healthy relationship" Lou explains.

"Too bad, don't know how you didn't jump his bones every time you were with him"

"Ew... Just ew. He's like my brother"

"And that Ross.... Damn. And I hear hanns going to be a daddy? That's hot."

"Okay Rose I'm hanging up now" Lou says and with two I love yous, she's slipping back into their room, seeing Matty awake and scrolling through his phone, smiling down at the screen.

"You know we look quite cute in these pictures" he says, eyes meeting hers. She's quick to jump on the bed, chin hooking onto his shoulder to peek at his screen. They did look cute and more importantly they looked happy. She smiles as Matty screenshots the photos.

"Deal with the consequences together, yeah?" Matty says, Lou nods at him, smiling as his lips press against hers.

"The first of which will be a very angry Jamie... And probably Gregg too" she says, Matty scrunching up his nose in agreement.

"Yeah...." His voice trails off making her giggle.

"I don't care... I'm happy"

"Me too love" he says, another kiss being delivered to her mouth.

"Rose called, think her and the girls want to come to the next show" she explains and Matty nods, typing something on his phone to Jamie, asking him to sort out their travel and to save them three tickets.

"Thank you" she says.

"If I remember correctly... They don't like me all that much do they?" He says and she's the one furrowing her nose at him, shaking her head.

"Guess I'll have to prove them wrong" and she almost dies at those words, lips harshly pressing against his. He groans as he pushes against her, her back hitting the bed.

"You're insatiable" he says, making her nod as her hands pull him in by the hips, forcing them to come into contact with hers in a sharp grind. She quickly finds him hard and resting against his abdomen and it doesn't take long before he's inside her.

"Jesus Christ" he groans, throwing his head back as her hands interweave into his curls. He's never going to get used to this.

----------------------------------------------------------

"You're supposed to tell me shit like this before you just decide to do it" Jamie says, his voice raised slightly, not shouting but firm and pointed.

Matty was standing in the centre of the room. George, Hann, Ross, John, and Jamie were all watching from the opposite side of the room, each of their arms crossed, ready to defend the pair if they needed to.

Carly (who had arrived this morning) and Polly were seated next to Lou on a large leather sofa.

"Come on man! It's not that big of a deal, we were holding hands, not making out" Matty says and Lou can't help but smirk.

"You know we have rules" Jamie says, making Matty (and all the boys scoff)

"I mean he's done worse" George says and Jamie whips around to see him, his finger pointing at the large man. Lou can't help but chuckle.

"Don't you start" and then he's turning to her now and her smile drops "and you"

"How am I supposed to explain this to your manager huh? How are we supposed to explain this to the fans?" Jamie asks. He was never really one to worry about these kinds of things, things were usually very chilled with him, it was one of the reasons the guys loved having him as their manager.

"Is it really that big of a deal?" Lou asks, Matty's eyes find hers and soften.

"Jamie listen" Lou says and the boy's manager finds her eyes and then soften, he had grown to have a soft spot for her "ignore Matty for a second" she says making everyone including the curly haired man laugh.

"When have I ever done anything problematic?" She asks and Jamie can't think of a single time, she was a saint (in the eyes of their fans anyway, Matty knew what she was truly like behind closed doors).

"We will do whatever you and Gregg want us to do... We just got caught up in the moment, okay?" Lou says and Jamie smiles at that, appreciating her words.

"You know what... Do whatever... We will deal with it" Jamie then says, almost completely giving in. The whole group smiled at that, the spirits lifted almost immediately. He goes to leave the room, turning back at the last minute.

"You're both serious about this right? This isn't some fuck around?" Jamie asks, already knowing the answer but wanting to confirm. They both share a look before looking at him again. They nod and he smiles.

"Well... Good" he says before leaving.

George hugs Matty as Lou is hugged by both Carly and Polly. She hadn't gotten much time to spend with the girls so when Matty's eyes found hers, although he wants nothing more than to spend time with her, he lets her have her own time with them.

"Look at you, you're glowing" Lou says, smiling at her friend. Carly smiles back at her thinking the same thing about Lou.

"How are you feeling? Can I get you anything?" Her words are rushed and Carly laughs, as does Poly.

"Lou calm down, I'm fine. Thank you though" she says sweetly. They continue talking and at some point Poly leaves them and soon after Hann joins, hooking a protective arm around his wife as his other hand toys with his wedding band. Lou always cries at the sight, feeling awfully sentimental today.

The couple stare at each other for a few seconds, smiles resting on their lips before they're both turning to look at her.

"Why are you both looking at me like that?" Lou asks, making them laugh.

"We've been meaning to ask you something" Adam says, words quiet so only the three of them could hear.

"We were wondering," Carly says, looking at her husband before looking at Lou again.

"When the baby is born... If you'd be godmother" Carly says and as skin as the words come out, tears are springing to Lou's eyes.

"Wh-what?" She stutters, completely unsure why they'd ask her of all people, she appreciates it nonetheless but is very confused.

"Truth is we wouldn't even be married if it wasn't for you" Adam says.

"That's not true" Lou says and Carly raises her eyebrows at her.

"Regardless... You've always been so welcoming of me, and so so supportive. And whenever I'm here, you're always the first to check up on me and the baby" Carly speaks, hands resting over her bunk as Adam nods next to her.

"You don't have to say yes. We'd just love it if you did. You know what you mean to us" Hann says and Lou is pulling them both into a tight hug, careful of the bump resting between them.

"I'd be honoured"

----------------------------------------------------------

The next evening Lou is pacing backstage at another venue, anxiously awaiting the arrival of her band of which included her baby sister (definitely not a baby but oh well). They had planned something special for this show, seeing as her bandmates were going to be there, the boys asked her to sing a song on her own, any song she liked.

"Lou you're making me anxious, stop pacing" George says, leisurely chilling on one of the sofas, Matty sitting next to him, a smirk resting on his face.

"Why are you smirking?" She quips at the man, who's curls have been tamed by an obscene amount of hair gel.

"Like seeing you like this, it's cute" he says, pulling her into his lap as she walks past them, stopping her pacing altogether.

"That's better" Matty says, making Lou giggle as he swarms her neck with light pecks.

"Absolutely disgusting" George says, standing to leave the pair of them.

"He's just jealous," Lou says, making Matty nod.

"Why are you anxious darling?" Matty says, nudging his nose lightly against hers.

"I haven't seen them in a while, I've missed them like crazy and I'm just.... I'm worried they're going to see what I'm like with you guys... And like hate me or something" Lou admits.

"You're crazy" Matty says, laughing at her "I don't know how many times I have to tell you love, but no one could hate you" he says, his words so simple but completely easing her thoughts.

"I love you" she says freely now, the man smiles widely down at her, pressing his mouth to hers sweetly.

"I love you more"

They hear a door open behind them, Lou jumping from her place in his lap, turning around to see three women standing in the hallway with Jamie. One of which runs towards her, screaming loudly, she jumps and Lou catches her as she laughs.

"Oh my god Mia you're not a child, I can't carry you anymore" Lou says, struggling to hold her sister up.

"I have fucking missed you bro" Mia says as she's placed back down, punching her older sister in the arm.

"Ouch" Lou says, all of the boys watch with their mouths open. Lou was talking to someone who looked almost identical to her, although her sister's hair was much lighter than hers and shorter too, her skin slightly paler, far less tattoos covering her body.

Rose and Cami are pulling her into a tight hug next, the four of them nattering like a bunch of mothers waiting to pick up their kids.

"Oh shit. Sorry" Lou turns to the guys who are still watching, mouth agape at the four of them. George is quick to stand up, pulling them all into hugs, muttering "long them no sees" to each of them.

"Of course you know George..." Lou says as she begins to introduce the guys. Every single one of them fawns over the man, making her roll her eyes, pointing her fingers at them, telling them to stop which makes George laugh. He knew they did it on purpose, to get under Lou's skin but he can't help but let it get to his ego too.

George wraps up Mia in a hug "how's my favourite sister doing?" He asks just to annoy Lou.

"Ha ha very funny" Lou says, pushing her best friend lightly as he wraps his arm around her too.

"This is Ross, Adam but we call him Hann, Carly: Adam's wife and mother of his unborn child" she says pointing to each of them, making everyone laugh at her words about Carly. She doesn't mention that she's going to be the child's godmother, wanting to savour that fact for a while.

"Penny, Jamie, John and... Matty" she's smiling at them and all the girls smile at everyone introduced, waving at them. The girls can't help but notice how Matty stares at her, his eyes set on no one else but her, a huge smile resting on his mouth. One look and they could see he was smitten.

"This is Rose our drummer, Cami our lead guitarist and my little sister Mia, who's our bassist" she smiles as she speaks, hooking her arm around Mia at the last instance.

"How did I not know you had a sister?" It's Matty who's speaking, almost all of the girls scowling at him, apart from Mia. He shares a look with the other guys, all of them shrugging, all of them knew she had a sister (although only George had met her) , how the fact had escaped the attention of Matty they did not know. He feels awful that he doesn't know, and wonders why he hadn't told her.

"Don't talk about me then sis? Oh how you wound me" her sister says, making her laugh and nudge her.

"Na, just kidding, it's all good. I lived in London, same dad, different mum" Mia explains, coming to pull Matty into a hug to properly introduce herself. Lou stands there watching them, finger in-between teeth as she watches how Matty freezes up awkwardly, the scene makes her chuckle.

"Mia stop being weird" she says, pulling her sister back from Matty.

The rest of them talk then, the girls talking to various people at scattered times. Mia stands with Matty and Lou, catching up about all sorts of things. Rose and Cami talk to Ross, Hann and Carly.

"Who's the one with the bun again?" Mia asks and Lou rolls her eyes as Matty smirks, knowing exactly why she's asking.

"That would be Ross, OUR bassist' ' Matty says, smirk clear on his face. His arm was wrapped tightly around Lou's waist, holding him to her. Mia thought they looked cute together and she couldn't help but smile at the huge smile resting on her older sister's face. She had never seen her this happy before.

"That's Ross?!" Mia almost shouts, catching the attention of the tall bearded man.

"Shut up" Lou says, Mia and her share a look, confusing Matty slightly. Mia was one of the only people that knew Lou and Ross shared a kiss when they were teenagers for they told each other everything.

"He's gotten a lot fitter than when you knocked about with them" Mia says, her London accent a lot more prominent as she speaks.

"You need to stop" Lou says, Matty and her laughing at the slightly smaller girl. Matty's eyes flick between them, eyebrows raising.

"Sorry I can't get over how similar you look, you seriously have different mum's? " Matty says, making them both groan.

"Oh god don't say that" they say in unison, Matty holds his hands up in surrender at the daggers they shoot.

"Forget I mentioned it" he's being pulled away by someone else then. Leaving the two sisters alone.

"I mean... I like him" Mia says, grasping her sister by the shoulders. Rose joins their conversation.

"That's because you didn't see how completely unbearable he was when we were kids" Rose says, beer in hand that Lou is completely unsure how she got.

"Alright Rose we get it. Give the poor guy a chance, people change" Cami speaks and Lou is thankful to her.

"So tell us, are the rumours true?" Rose then asks.

"What rumours?" Lou asks, eyebrows furrowing at her bandmate.

"The rumours when we were kids.... That he's a good shag" rose says, always one to be forefront with her questions, something which often got them into trouble.

"You know what, you carry on mingling, I need a fag" Lou chuckles before finding her way out of one of the side doors, she hears them all laughing behind her.

The cigarette quickly finds its place in-between her lips, lighter sparking, the end burning as she breathes it in. She hears the door open and then shut behind her but she doesn't turn. She doesn't need to, she can smell two familiar scents: one of the man she loved and one of her life long best friend.

There's a silence for a few seconds as they light their own cigarettes, Matty's arm hooking around her waist when he sees her shiver.

"Sorry Lou but your sister is fitter than the last time I saw her" George says, making her cringe and making Matty chuckle.

"Ew. Just ew. And you have a girlfriend" Lou says simply, she doesn't miss how Matty leans in whispering a "you're fitter" into her ear. It's kind of a weird compliment, she never once compared herself to her sister, but she can't deny the way his words make her thighs tighten. She suppose it's because he's the one saying it and she's the one he wants when there's plenty of other beautiful girls, including the ones back inside, who he could easily get.

"They seem nice" Matty then says, loud enough for them both to hear.

"They are. But they're fucking mental though. Sorry if Rose is a bitch to you, her heart is in the right place" Lou explains, talking to Matty now, ignoring her best friend.

"It's okay, I get it. I was a dick remember?" Matty asks and Lou and George nod at him, all three of them laughing at his words.

"Cami is an absolute sweetheart so you don't have to worry about anything with her... Maybe just" she turns to Matty, placing a hand on her chest "watch what you say" this makes George laugh.

"And Mia... Keep her away from Ross will you? She's small but she will break that man" Lou says, her words shocking the two men, making them laugh anyway.

"Really?" George says, raising his eyebrows "maybe he needs to be broken" and Lou is groaning at his words.

"Don't you even try George" she says, the man flicking his fag to the floor, running back inside, giggling like an absolute child.

"George!" She shouts, giving in when the door swings back. She turns back to Matty then, who is smiling widely at her. His curls have once again been tamed by an unruly amount of hair gel, she almost frowns at the fact she can't run her fingers through the strands.

"Remind me why you didn't tell me you had a sister?" He asks and she frowns at him, thinking of an answer, not really having a definite one.

"Hmmm... I dunno. Guess I never thought to tell you before... And now... Think I was too wrapped up in you to tell you" she says, feeling a bit bad that she hadn't mentioned her own sister.

"As much as I love that... Told you I wanted to know everything about you" he says and she nods.

"I know... You'll get to know her now though, she loves you already so you definitely don't have to worry about her" she seals her words with a brief kiss.

"You seem different around them" Matty admits, making her eyebrows furrow, not knowing whether the meaning behind his words was a good or bad difference.

"How?" She asks, he smooths his hands over her waist, pulling her closer as his back leans against the concrete of the wall.

"You're like the leader of their pack, they all look to you, you shine" he admits and his eyes sparkle as he speaks "like seeing you shine". She doesn't quite know what to say but opts for the truth.

"I've actually been enjoying not being the frontman for a bit... Happy to be in the background and bask in your light" she says, his heart flutters at her words.

"Oh honey..." His fingers tucking a piece of hair behind her ear that had fallen, choosing to gently grip her chin instead of dropping back to his side.

"You've got your own light, even at the back... Everyone's looking at you" he says and she doesn't believe his words. She had a few of her own fans come to their gigs but the majority were there to see the boys and Matty, of course because it was their show, she was just there to help. She shakes her head at him, making him chuckle.

"Wish you could see yourself the way I see you... The way thousands of people see you. Trust me darling... You shine" he seals his lips against hers now, not letting her utter another word. His words had some truth to them that she didn't see, the guys often found themselves watching her even on that stage, she radiated something more than any of them could give.

And Matty especially couldn't take his eyes off her, she was everything, up on that stage, in a coffee shop, amongst friends, under the covers in their room: she shined.

Their lips move passionately against each other, neither able to get enough of each other. He's pulling her as she pulls him, trying to get closer even though it wasn't possible.

Neither of them had spoken about the fact that in two days they would be at the end of the first leg of their tour. They'd been setting off on a three week break, every single person had made plans except the two of them, too wrapped up in each other to have spoken about it.

The door creaks open next to them and they hear someone cough. They pull apart, both looking to see sweet Cami standing there.

"They're calling you on stage" Lou appreciates that she makes no crude comments, and doesn't groan at the sight of them.

They leave to play then, the crowd like no other tonight. She doesn't know if it's because she has her bandmates and her sister here or maybe because things are going so well with Matty, but the smile on her face never leaves. They play song after song, each one better than the last and when the second half rolls round and Matty introduces them, he surprises her.

"So we have two more shows after this one... And then we're on a three week break" he mentions it now and suddenly it dawns on her.

" I haven't made any plans... I've been a little distracted..." He says, looking over to her, making the crowd go mental "the truth is I've been having the time of my life with someone truly truly amazing and I'm the happiest I've ever been" he says. She thinks that his words are good enough for her for now, that's all the fans really need to know.

"This tour... We had someone amazing join us... I wasn't overjoyed at first, everyone on this stage right now would tell you that... Including her, especially her" he says and they all chuckle to themselves, Lou's eyes never wavering from his.

"But my god... George" he says turning around to face his best mate "thank you" he says, hands flat against each other, raising them to his chin as he tilts his head.

"Thank you to these boys right here" he says, pointing to Hann, George and then Ross "for making the best decision ever and bringing this wonderful person on tour with us" Matty says, finally pointing to her. Some fans may think he's just being sentimental, thanking her for joining them this far. Some will know the true meaning to his words, all but confirming what they were.

"Our wonderful Lou, would you come here for a second please?" He asks, and exactly as they planned she walks over to him, smiling as he pulls her into a tight hug before they pull back, his hand resting on her shoulder.

"Now you've got an absolute treat tonight" Matty says and someone passes her, her acoustic guitar. Matty moves from his stool and lets her sit there.

"The amazing Lou everyone" he says before he's leaving, everyone leaves the stage then, joining the girls backstage and watching from the sidelines.

"God this is daunting" she says into the microphone, making the crowd laugh "Yeah I know this is my job but I haven't been up here on my own for a hot minute" they laugh again.

She's shining again Matty thinks, god he loved how she shines.

"Boys please come back" she says, everyone laughing again.

"Okay okay" she says, shaking her nerves off as she begins checking if the guitar is in tune.

"I need to say a couple of things before I start, unplanned I know" she says, saying her last words to the guys on the side of the stage.

"Can't let Matty say all that without me saying anything" she laughs and she sees him smile at her.

"My band is here tonight" the crowd screams "my little sister"

"And I can't remember a time where I felt as happy as I do now. We're a family here at the 1975... I know that more than anything else" she says her words making the boy's eyes fill with tears.

"I guess I just want to say thank you to the whole team... And to my four boys, you know I'm not the best with words so I've been wanting to do something to show you guys how much you mean to me instead. So I thought I'd sing you a beautiful song. One which you wrote. This is for you" she says, beginning to play the beginning chords to "When We Are Together".

She plays a stripped back version of the song, somehow making it more sentimental, the boys find themselves hugging each other backstage.

Matty stares at her intently as she sings, the voice he loves so much filling the entire arena, he's in awe that the entire audience is silent, simply listening to her sing.

"You ask about the cows, wearin' my sweater

It's somethin' 'bout the weather that makes them lie down

The only time I feel I might get better is when we are together" she sings, her voice soft and sweet, undeniably beautiful.

She sings the song to the end, only then looking up at the audience. Her own eyes glisten with tears that are yet to fall but they do when she sees everyone holding up their phone, a few people crying their own tears. The boys are quick to join her on stage, hugging her tightly in a group hug before they return to their places on the stage.

"I love you" Matty mouths to her making her smile and mouth an "I love you too" back. Neither caring that thousands of people were watching them.

----------------------------------------------------------

George somehow ropes them all into a night out. Explaining that they hadn't had one yet despite being nearly at the end of their first leg. It was a rare occurrence for the band not to have had one, but they had all agreed that until they were all settled they wouldn't have a crazy night out.

But as the first leg was coming to an end, they had all agreed it was much needed and well deserved. Plus, the addition of Lou's bandmates had them all in high spirits.

"Got to give the newbies a proper 75 welcome" Ross says, wrapping an arm around Lou, pulling her into his side.

"Hey I'm not a newbie anymore" she argues back, jokingly shoving the man above her, shrugging away from his grip.

"But you haven't been out with us losers since we were teenagers" he quips back and she can't argue with that.

So they all rushed back to their hotel, the girls taking up Lou's room which was yet to be touched. Matty frowns as she disappears between the doors, leaving him to get ready on his own. Lou quickly showers, slicks back her hair into a high pony and applies some make up, not too much on her face but a dark eye, before joining the girls back in her room, wrapped up in a white robe.

"Feel like seeing how much that man has the hots for you?" Cami says, making Lou laugh as she searches through her suitcase. The girls seemed to have come prepared, suspecting that a night out would be on the agenda.

"We're not going anywhere fancy Cami, George knows some dj at this club and they've got us a booth" she explains, failing to mention that it was in the VIP section, something she didn't like to brag about. Cami holds up a silk dress with a deep v and a high slit, Lou shakes her head "too fancy".

Cami mutters an "okay okay" before she proceeds to throw more things from her suitcase, a mischievous look on her face as she puts together a few items.

One of which is a skirt that is far too short even for Lou, she had thrown all sorts of items in there, some of which she hadn't worn in ages.

"Cami that skirt it so fucking short" Lou says, unsure about it, and the slit that revealed half her thigh. Cami proceeds to throw the skirt at her, along with a deep v lace bodysuit and a cropped blazer.

"Just try it on" she says, the other girls nodding. Lou sighs deeply.

"Don't encourage her" she says, pointing to the other girls.

She makes her way to the en-suite bathroom, removing her robe before putting on the assortment of clothes Cami had selected. She finds herself smirking at her reflection, her ego was far from big but she knew that one look from Matty and he'd be on his knees.

She makes her way back into the room, her bandmates gasping at her.

"That's it. That's the one. I'm a genius" Cami says, placing a kiss on each of her cheeks.

"I'd do you" Rose says, making them all laugh, her fingertips pluck the "M" necklace that rests against the centre of her chest, just falling in-between her boobs. Rose smiles and lifts an eyebrow.

"Can't lie... That's undeniably cute" she says and Lou smiles.

"I know I give him shit... And I will continue to until I see fit" rose says making Lou laugh "but it's obvious he's madly in love with you... And you seem really happy" she says and Lou nods at her.

"I am... I don't even remember what it was like before... I hated him because I thought he hated me... As soon as I found out he didn't, everything kind of just fell in to place" Lou explains, mia standing up to hug her sister.

The other girls get ready after that, Lou helping them do their hair and make up, hearing the guys laughing from outside.

Rose wears a simple black dress that sits tightly on her body, Cami settles for a black pair of skinny jeans and a lace bralette, whilst Mia adorns leather trousers and black one shoulder bodysuit.

"You guys are going to give them heart attacks," Lou says, making all the girls laugh.

They then make their way into the main room, Lou the last to leave, before she does she hears George say "Was wondering why you took so long but now I understand. Look lovely girls" he says, his words fairly tame in comparison to what she'd thought he'd say.

"Where's the woman of the hour?" He jokes before she steps into the threshold. Her eyes find Mattys almost instantly and she can't help but smirk at him.

He was sitting on one of the sofas, legs spread wide almost as if he's ready for her to take her place in them. He shoots up as soon as he sees her, tugging at the shirt that rests almost uncomfortably around his neck now.

He's dressed in black suit trousers, a plain white T Shirt tucked in with a black shirt thrown over the top, the buttons almost all undone except two at the bottom, the shirt is sheer and she holds back moan as she sees him. His hair isn't tamed by gel now, unruly curls sat atop his head, ready to be tugged.

"Damnnn" George says, hand reaching for hers and getting his best friend to do a twirl, which makes her laugh. She didn't notice Matty coming over to her but she sure as hell notices the look he gives George, one in which she had never seen before.

His eyes warned his best friend to watch his mouth and George instantly stepped away, he was being territorial and she was surprised with how much she liked the feeling.

"Baby..." He practically whispers, hands coming to find her waist, gently pulling her body to his, his touch is unsure, as if he thought he wasn't deserving of it. Behind them, everyone begins talking to each other, letting the couple be.

"You look..." He swallows deeply and the sight kills her. She's glad her outfit had the outcome she had desired but as his dark eyes find hers she finds herself lost for words. Her eyebrows raise up at him, begging him to finish his sentence.

"Devine..." He says, as if she's a meal to devour. She couldn't care in the slightest, she loved how he much he wanted her and how little he tried to hide it.

"Hmm" she says, hands flat against his chest, she doesn't even beginning to describe how good he looks before George is interrupting them.

"We should probably leave before these two start fucking" George says, making everyone chuckle.

The club is loud and George disappears the minute they arrive, talking to the DJ of the night who lets George take rein of the music for a bit. The others find themselves at their booth, drinks already waiting for them.

Matty's hand is firmly clasped on her thigh as his other arm hooks around the back of her. His hand comes to fit at the back of her neck and she finds herself loving the feel of it. His grasp wasn't too tight but wasn't exactly soft and she has to stop herself from pressing her lips against his.

Ross is sat opposite them talking to Mia, her hand rests on his knee as they talk over the loud music. Cami and Rose are already on the dance floor, laughing with each other as they danced and drank.

He leans into speak to her, having to place his mouth directly next to her ear for her to hear "saw about 6 different guys stare at you as we walked in love" he says, almost proud of the fact.

"Yeah?" She asks and he smirks.

"Don't blame them, you look fucking hot" he says, making her chuckle and lean into him.

"Bet it must feel nice knowing I'm yours huh?" She asks and his smirk falls, mouth agape for a beat before his lips find hers for a firm peck.

"You're not mine yet love, not really. You could go over to any one of them right now and do what you wanted" he speaks and she smiles at him, shaking her head at his words. His words which were just to test her. He wanted nothing more than for her to say his words weren't true.

"Its shame for them then isn't it?" She says making his eyebrows furrow, not knowing what she meant.

"Shame I want you and not them" she says, standing from the booth, hand finding his as she stands.

"Besides" she says, leaning down to him until her mouth grazes his ear, making him shiver "if I'm not yours... you should do something about that" she says before looking at Mia.

"Want to dance?" She asks and Mia smiles widely, standing almost instantly. Lou notices the clear frown on Ross' lips and she smiles, raising her eyebrows at the bearded man.

The two girls quickly make their way to the dance floor positioning themselves so they can be seen by the guys (who's eyes never leave them).

Ross and Cami are quick to find them, the four of them dancing with each other, laughing and drinking.

Lou feels a tap to her shoulder so she turns, looking up at a guy who she doesn't recognise, a 6 ft something guy who, if she wasnt completely smitten with Matty she would find attractive, he had curls too but they weren't the same as Matty's, he looks sweet, a we'll put together man who no doubt has a large sum to his name. She stands there awkwardly waiting for the man to speak.

"Sorry I saw you across the room and just had to say hi" he speaks the cliche line and she chuckles.

"Does that line usually work for you?" She shouts over the loud song that's playing, the girls behind her laughing.

"I don't know, it's the first time I'm using it, you tell me" he says smoothly and Lou chuckles again.

"Ah come on Lou, let him buy you a drink" Rose says and she knows she just wants to see Matty's reaction.

"Lou? Is that your name? A pretty name for a pretty girl" he says and she can't help but cringe a little.

"I'm actually here with-" she begins to say she's here with someone but is interrupted by rose again.

"No she's not, she's just being modest, buy her a drink, a martini" she says and Lou chuckles as they man smiles before leaving.

"I hate martinis" Lou says and rose smirks.

"I know, but I love them" she says leaning in to speak into her ear "turn around, it worked" rose says.

Lou turns and is suddenly flushed against Matty's chest, she stumbles but his hand quickly finds her waist, holding her against him.

"Hi" she smiles.

"Hi" he smiles back, looking down at her. His eyes flick to the bar where he sees the guy he was all but ready to pounce on if he made a single move. Lou turns her head to see who he's looking at and she smiles upon turnjng around to face him again.

Her hands rest against his shoulders as a slow beat plays, she steps towards him so they're closer.

"You don't have to worry about him" she whispers into his ear. His hands grip her hips as she begins to move against him.

"Hmm why's that?" He mumbles into her ear, lips finding their way to her neck.

"Think you already know Matty" she says, pulling back to look at him. Her eyes plead with him, begging him to just kiss her already.

"Because you're mine yeah?" He shouts smiling down at her. She simply nods and his eyes leave her for a second, flicking to someone behind her again.

"Sorry mate" he speaks to whoever is behind her, probably the guy from a minute ago, but Lou's eyes are training on the curly man holding her "she's my missus" the words leave his mouth before he even processes them.

She hears a grumble behind her and then Matty's eyes are on hers again.

"Your missus huh? Like the sound of that" she pulls his mouth to hers then, lips pressing against one another with fervour. Him using that word so casually awakens something in her (and seemingly him too).

He tries to speak through their kiss, eventually having to break away.

"Be my girlfriend? Like proper girlfriend" he asks, it was not the way he had intended on asking her but he was desperate now, not wanting to go another minute without asking her.

"Wanted to ask you in a better setting than this love but-" her lips are on his again, shutting him up. She goes to say yes but suddenly a lanky man is pulling the pair into a tight hug.

"Fucking love you guys" George says, making the two of them laugh loudly.

"How much have you had to drink?" She laughs and he smears a kiss to her cheek before doing the same to Matty.

"Question is... Why haven't you?" His words make no sense but they allow him to pull them back to the booth and allow him to make the whole group (save for Matty) do a few shots. Lou doesn't drink as much as the rest of the group, wanting to support Matty but also wanting to remember the night, for it was already an amazing one.

As the night progresses, Ross and Mia are dancing together, her hands flat against his chest as their bodies moved against one another.

Matty and Lou were flush against the wall in the corner of the room, hiding from everyone else, needing some time to be alone.

"You never answered my question" he says as his head tucks into her neck, lips pressing against the skin.

"Kind of got interrupted" she sighs, hands threading through the curls at the nape of his neck.

"Yeah George keeps fucking doing that tonight" He pulls back to look at her and she smiles.

"Yes I'll be your girlfriend" she says and he mirrors her, wide smiles adorning both of their faces.

"Yeah? Don't care that I asked you in the middle of some sweaty club" he asks and she shakes her head.

"No, because it's you. I'd of said yes no matter what Matty" and the confession has him blushing deeply, pulling her into him to place a loving kiss to her mouth.

"Didn't get to finish what you were saying to me earlier either... Some best friend g is" Matty says, needing to hear what she wanted to say.

"Yeah... Was going to say how good you looked" she says, smoothing her hands down his white Tshirt, fingertips pulling the shirt that rests either side of his frame, until their mouths meet again.

They break away a few moments later and his eyes wander to the centre of the dancefloor where Ross and Mia can be seen.

"Told George to keep her away from that man, she'll break his heart" Lou groans eyes finding where Matty was looking and he laughs at her words.

"You know I know about that night right" Matty says as his eyes snap back to hers, looking down at her as she frowns up at him, not knowing what she was talking about.

"What happened between you and Ross" Matty says, a smirk resting against his lips as Lou's mouth falls open.

"What- how?" She asks, mouth agape, lost for words.

"He's my best friend love, told me as soon as he knew I had feelings for you" he says, thumb drifting along her cheek.

"And? What do you think about it?" She asks, searching his face for any signs of him being annoyed at her.

"Well that depends..." He asks, a darkness to his words, lips pressing against hers, confusing her.

"Depends on what?" She murmurs against his mouth, pulling at his shirt, needing him closer to her.

"What was it like?" He asks, pressing his mouth to hers the moment he finished talking.

"Want the truth?" She asks and he nods against her mouth as his tongue finds hers. She allows them to fight for a moment until she lets his push harshly against hers, making her core flutter and letting him lead the kiss.

She pulls away from him for a second, dark eyes finding his and she smirks.

"It was hot... At the time" she says and she smirks down at her.

"Ross said the same thing" he says and Lou's eyebrows raise.

"Yeah?" Mattys hand drifts along her waist, landing against her hip, pulling her flush against him, moving their bodies to the beat of the music. Her arm hooks over his shoulder, clinging onto him as his hips ground down against hers.

He nods down at her and she finds herself confused as to why he's smirking still.

"If he told you that... Why are you smirking?" She asks, moaning into his mouth as his lips press against hers again.

"Because... It was a childhood makeout, doesn't mean anything... Fizzled out anyway" Matty says, repeating what Ross had explained to him. His lips find her neck again and she sighs.

"Hmm.. what if I said otherwise?" She says, purely teasing him. His head snaps away from her neck, finding her eyes, seriousness now covering his features.

"That's just mean love" he says, and she smirks up at him now, he doesn't find it funny and she's quick to drop the act. Softly playing with his hair as anger clouds his eyes.

"Baby I'm joking" she says, pressing a soft kiss to his cheek, drifting them down to his neck and up to the shell of his ear.

"Doesn't mean anything... You're the one I want. My boyfriend" her last words are what gets him to snap back to how he was moments prior. It's what makes him press his mouth back to hers and grind his hips down to hers.

"Say it again" he murmurs into her mouth.

"My boyfriend"

"Fuck" his tongue roughly presses against hers and her hold on him tightens as pleasure increases throughout her body as she feels his hardened length pressing against her core.

"Want to get out of here?" He asks as he pulls away from her. She's quickly nodding up at him making him smirk.

"Good. Can't wait to get you out of this fucking skirt" he says, hand running along the hem of it, caressing her thigh. They quickly weave themselves out of the club, leaving their friends, leaving Lou's sister who is likely still with Ross.

----------------------------------------------------------

Their naked bodies are sprawled out on the bed of their hotel room, Matty is lying on his front as Lou is at his side. Her fingers drift along the expanse of his back, the muscles contracting under her touch before she presses light kisses to the skin.

"We have a break in two days" he says, his voice quiet, looking over his shoulder to find his girlfriend, who's arms were resting against his back.

"Want to spend it with you" Matty says, turning onto his back, she allows him and then lies back down onto his stomach now.

"Id like that" she smiles, pressing a kiss against his stomach.

"Think we should go away for a bit... Just us" he says and she nods again.

"Need to go home too though, need to see my family... And G's" she says and Matty nods.

"My mum's been wanting to see you again. Hasnt seen you since we were kids" he says. A man of many confessions tonight it seems

"Id love that. She always loved me" she says and Matty nods.

"Yeah I know... Used to give me so much shit for treating you the way I did. Said I was a cruel boy" he admits, his words holding a certain sadness to them.

"It's okay, made up for it now" she says and she smiles slightly.

"I'm so sorry"

"Baby no. You don't have to apologise anymore. I forgive you" she says, lips pressing softly against his stomach again, moving upwards until pressing against his lips.

"I know... Just needed to say it" he says and she nods.

"Can't believe you're my girlfriend" he says, hands moving her hair from her face, wanting to truly see her.

"You know... I never really said sorry for how I was to you" she admits and he looks down at her.

"You weren't nearly as bad as me love"

"That's not the point though... I'm sorry Matty, truly I am. Things were so different back then, it's kind of crazy" she says and he nods.

"Why did you hate me?" He asks, looking down at her, she didn't mind being asked it, they hadn't actually spoken about it yet.

"Suppose at first I hated you because you hated me... I tried to get you to like me... But after a while I gave in... Hated you because despite everything the guys said about you, about you being this lovely guy who would do anything for his mates... You weren't that person with me and I desperately wanted you to be... So I hated you because you didn't allow me to have you that way" she admits, something she had never admitted aloud before.

"I never knew that" he says, frowning at her. She knows he's about to apologise again so she presses her mouth to his.

"I often saw the way you were with them, when you thought I wasn't looking and I felt jealous... You told me the guys got to have me in a way you didn't and it was the same for me" she says.

"God we really made a mess of things didn't we?" He says, chuckling at the whole messy situation. She smiles at him and nods.

"Think we've made up for it now don't you think?" She asks and he nods, kissing her sweetly.

"My girlfriend"

"Your girlfriend" she smiles.

"Think I'm ready to make it obvious were dating" he says and she nods.

"That sounds like a wonderful idea" she says lying down on his chest and listening to his heart beat until she falls asleep.

"I love you" he murmurs although she's asleep on his arms now.

"I've always loved you" he says before he feels himself drifting to sleep too.

Part 9

#matty healy #matty the 1975 #matty healy fan fic #matty healy smut #matty healy series #insufferable arsehole matty healy series #the 1975 fanfic #the 1975 #the 1975 smut #george daniel #ross macdonald #adam hann #matty healy x oc #matty healy x reader

138 notes · View notes

miraculouscontent · 3 years

Text

Hi, Adrien is handed things on a silver platter whereas Marinette has to work for them.

First thing’s first is just the concept of the love square. Chat Noir gets to interact with Ladybug no matter what because they’re heroes. Ladybug - who carries the weight and responsibility of heroism without getting benefited from it - is required to go to every battle due to her purification ability, and Chat Noir of course is going to show up because he loves both flirting with Ladybug and the freedom of being a superhero.

In addition, Adrien got his miraculous by helping Master Fu up (something that would be expected out of any semi-decent person; by the way, yes, I know the “””significance””” of the action, and it’s silly), whereas Marinette saved him from being hit by a car.

Adrien was allowed back in school with still no explanation from Gabriel (especially since he’s Hawk Moth) as to why he thought it was a good idea to send his son to a school where the very first akumatization had happened. It was Adrien’s goal for the episode alongside making friends, and Nino offered him friendship out of pity when Adrien sulked about how Chloe was the closest thing to a friend he had.

Chat crushes on Ladybug because she stood up to Hawk Moth in a speech dripping with confidence, caught what seemed like hundreds of akuma, and came up with a plan quick enough to save Mylene and Ivan from falling to their deaths from the top of the Eiffel Tower. Marinette (who Chat fell in love with one side of first, mind you, so already this is to his benefit), meanwhile, crushes on Adrien because the narrative gave her a falsehood about him never having any friends (i.e: no Chloe) and he gave her an umbrella while he was ten meters away from his actual ride (like with Fu, again, any decent person--).

Chat’s crush on Ladybug makes things harder for her because it causes him to throw tantrums mid-battle, get distracted and distract her because he’s busy flirting, all of which make her feel guilty for not returning his feelings. Marinette’s crush on Adrien makes things hard for her again because it causes her to embarrass herself while virtually everyone who knows teases/mocks her for it, their opinions of her even being dragged down due to the crush (see Alya with the Lila situation).

Chat is shipped with Ladybug by Parisians everywhere and Alya delighted in taking a picture of them kissing (that got posted on the Ladyblog without Ladybug’s consent). Likewise, the other LadyNoir kiss (that Ladybug had to do to free Chat from Dark Cupid’s control) was shown on live TV for all watching to see. Marinette’s kisses with Adrien, however, were either wiped from the timeline (in which Adrien got to keep a secret from her so he could date “””Ladybug”””) or used to humiliate her because Adrien was attempting a prank.

Ladybug realizes that Chat is in serious about her, not because he told her himself, but because he relayed it to Marinette who happened to be Ladybug. Marinette, on the other hand, has spent 3+ seasons attempting to confess her feelings to Adrien or make advances on him, all of which ended in some form of failure and some of which through no fault of her own.

Chloe shoved her in “Bubbler” (Adrien didn’t even check on her) and then Nathalie crushed the note she’d written on a scarf that Marinette put tons of time and effort into, leading to Adrien thinking it was from his dad.

“Copycat” was accidental and came on too strong, requiring its deletion.

She got distracted by Alya and forgot to write her name in “Dark Cupid,” her letter only further solidifying Chat’s crush on Ladybug.

She kept getting interrupted in “Gamer” after Alya chided her for using the event to get with Adrien (despite Alya doing the same thing for Marinette during the film in “Horrificator” while Mylene was MIA).

She wasn’t able to tell Adrien about Lila’s thievery in “Volpina” because the grimoire had to remain a secret.

The hat in “A Christmas Special” got given away within minutes and then not even brought back on-screen by Miraculous Ladybug (Adrien never even thanked Marinette personally for it).

Kagami came out of nowhere to take the fencing spot in “Riposte.”

Deciding not to make schemes only led to her embarrassment in “Gigantitan.”

She got made fun of and the notes all conveniently looked the same in “Backwarder,” leading to her mixing them up.

The macaron for Adrien (that Marinette would prepare every week) never got eaten by him and ended up causing the akuma after Chloe had emotionally manipulated Marinette into scheming with her.

Practicing on a statue (as per Tikki’s advice) in “The Puppeteer 2″ humiliated her when Adrien revealed himself as the statue.

She was embarrassed during the party in “Party Crasher” because she was pressured into dancing without her consent.

The timeline had to be reset in “Chat Blanc” and she had to lie to her friends that she hadn’t given Adrien the gift even though she’d actually succeeded, while the hat she made just for Adrien got written off as a gift from a random fan (which is an even worse fate than the scarf).

The confession in “Felix” was deleted by Felix himself before Adrien could see it.

And Adrien, meanwhile? Ohhhh boy, lemme tell you about Adrien.

He gets put into suggestive/close positions with Ladybug on many, many occasions, all for “free.”

He got a kiss from Ladybug in “Dark Cupid” that, remember, got photographed and put on live TV.

He got to goad the audience without consequence about he and Ladybug potentially being in a relationship eventually - gaining the knowledge that all of Paris was invested in LadyNoir to thoroughly stroke his ego - and then Ladybug had to act like they were a couple in “Prime Queen” to the point of holding Chat’s hand and saying that they were in love.

Likewise, “Glaciator” featured Ladybug having to act like a couple with him again, now to the point of kissing his cheek, and then Chat got a blush from her after he’d spent a good chunk of the akuma battle pouting that Ladybug didn’t come to the date he set up (that she hadn’t even known was a date because he purposefully withheld that information) despite her telling him that she’d have to see about it because she had plans.

He was reassured in “Anansi” on being “irreplaceable” after he made an unnecessary comment about being replaced by a turtle (Carapace).

He got to carry Ladybug around bridal style and also save her in “Sandboy” and “Reverser” respectively because she was rendered essentially useless without him, then got to save her again in “Frozer” after giving her the cold shoulder for rejecting his feelings.

He’s the one who got told by Marinette’s own parent not to apologize for how he feels in “Weredad” (note that Marinette herself never got this talk from Sabine, nor Tom, which very much could’ve prevented “Crocoduel”).

He got a cheek kiss from Ladybug in “Desperada” after getting to undo the very-much-against-the-rules identity reveal he made to her via Second Chance.

He got to look good in “Gamer 2.0″ when Ladybug was seeking advice from him despite the fact that her and Chat’s situations hero-wise are absolutely, completely, 100% different and he didn’t even try to take that into account.

He got Ladybug resting her head on his shoulder because of what she saw in a deleted time in which he - unbeknownst to her - lied by omission.

A fake Ladybug tried to kiss him on two separate occasions, “The Puppeteer 2″ and “Ladybug,” much to his delight (something to note is that the fake Adrien who went after Ladybug in both “Chameleon” and “Felix” tried to force themselves on her).

He got the “jealousy” moment from Ladybug in “Heart Hunter” and then a hug from Aquabug in “Miracle Queen.”

He received no repercussions for taking Ladybug out on a date (that she wasn’t aware was going to be a date) in “Gang of Secrets,” at best having to apologize for her behavior to the people around them.

He got reassured that Ladybug “couldn’t do this without him” in “Guiltrip,” even to the point of being told that she “probably doesn’t tell him enough.”

He got told by Ladybug that she would never abandon him in “Hack-San” because he was guilting her sulking about how his not knowing her identity would mean that he’d never see her again if she left him somehow.

And before you think this only extends to the romantic aspects of love square, let me tell you now that it definitely doesn’t.

Marinette entered the bowler hat competition and had to defend her own work to the judge.

She ran for class representative and had to earn the trust and faith of her class in “Darkblade” when put up against Chloe’s bribery.

She did whatever she could to make sure Juleka got her picture taken in “Reflekta.”

She had to actually craft a pair of glasses suitable for Jagged Stone in “Pixelator” and then make a gorgeous album cover for him in “Guitar Villain.” (note that this partially led to “Troublemaker” where she was just happily wanting to advertise her parents’ business, and the writers multiplied her Adrien pictures for the sake humiliating her when it was caught on live TV)

She had to work to get ungrounded by improving her attendance in “Simon Says,” because she had been busy being a hero.

She worked to try and get Nathaniel and Marc to get together on a project, knowing it would be good for both of them.

She set up an entire celebration for her bully to try and make said bully feel good about herself in “Malediktator.”

She did Kitty Section’s designs and costumes in “Silencer” and then had to go protect them from being stolen, along with her friends’ music.

She had to wear multiple miraculouses in “Kwamibuster” in order to go against Kwamibuster and get back both the ladybug earrings and the cat ring.

“Gamer 2.0.” Just... “Gamer 2.0.″

She made a whole complex lockbox to protect the Miracle Box in “Gang of Secrets.”

She worked to reach out to Zoe in “Sole Crusher” even after Zoe trashed her in front of the school, going as far as to try and comfort Zoe’s akumatized form.

She had to stand up for the movie to be fixed in “Queen Banana” because no one else would.

She has to work each and every akuma battle as Ladybug, figuring out Lucky Charms that can range from simple to complicated, while simultaneously dealing with a partner who relies heavily on her plans and will occasionally make things harder by either throwing tantrums mid-battle or distracting her.

And meanwhile...

Chat Noir got to throw the blame onto Ladybug for Theo’s akumatization in “Copycat.”

Marinette covered for him in “The Collector” when he was the one who recklessly lost the grimoire by not being careful with it.

He got handed Fu’s identity in “Syren” after whining to Ladybug, throwing blame on her and trying to bribe Plagg so they’d tell him, threatening to quit while Paris was underwater, and all of this while Marinette herself only got to meet Fu because she had the grimoire on her.

He was given the moral high ground in “Malediktator” despite not having to actually care about Chloe enough to call/check on her.

He got to sit back in “Chameleon” and not concern himself with judgment or comment on the situation with Lila, even going into “Ladybug” where he continues to inform no one about Lila (including Marinette, who briefly believed that Lila came to her senses and was willing to make amends) after Lila got Marinette expelled, despite the complete lack of risk on his part considering who his father is and how harshly Lila would be dragged through the mud if she dared to trash his reputation.

He clumsily trips in “Captain Hardrock” in a fashion that reveals an instrument he happens to play, leading to him getting invited to join Kitty Section within seconds of being on the Liberty. (so when Adrien is clumsy, it’s to his benefit, and when Marinette is clumsy, it’s to her detriment)

He never got called out for distracting Ladybug and digging for details that could relate to her identity in “Kwamibuster” (which, again, forced Marinette to do all the work to fix things).

He got a party thrown for him in “Party Crasher” by Nino, and also guys that Adrien had never put forth effort into interacting with or befriending (Marinette had also been through more with all of them sans Nino).

He got to force Ladybug’s favorite traits of his out of her in “Truth” because she was under the influence of Truth’s powers.

He got off the hook for sacrificing himself in “Lies” by flirting about Ladybug’s “irresistible angry little pout,” and also never got repercussions for flirting with another girl while dating Kagami.

He never had to face consequences for smashing a chimney in “Sentibubbler,” even as he was dismissing the gesture because he knew Miraculous Ladybug would fix it.

He didn’t have to apologize for his behavior in “Hack-San,” whereas Ladybug "had to” for telling someone else her identity (the details of why - i.e: that she was having a mental breakdown and needed a release from it - being completely left out) and not telling him that she was leaving (when she literally hadn’t had time to tell him anything; do note as well that Adrien didn’t have to do the same in either “Backwarder” or “Startrain”).

He received no consequences and was in fact rewarded for allowing the akuma in “Wishmaker” to hit him, a choice that Viperion has to live with because it caused him to see both Ladybug and Chat’s identities (meaning now Luka - someone who, like the guys in “Party Crasher” - Adrien has done virtually nothing for - can support Adrien since he knows).

And I could go on, I really could, but my point is that Adrien is given all of the sympathy and sad points while Marinette basically never is. Just like how he was born swimming in money, fame, and adoring fans, the show hands out praises and all the things he’s ever wanted because he’s sad.

He doesn’t have to try. He can whine and complain and vent to Plagg about how “replaceable” he is because the show will mollycoddle him to the moon and back. They’ll put his crush on Ladybug’s shoulders to make her feel guilty while Marinette is over here having to bust her butt just for a chance at Adrien recognizing any semblance of her feelings, and he goes on being blissfully ignorant of them so he doesn’t have to suffer like Ladybug does.

In addition, Marinette has to either be “““making mistakes”““ or embarrassing herself in order to get screen time because the burden of lessons fails upon her, whereas Adrien can be name-dropped without even doing anything.

It’s not just the love square that’s unbalanced, it’s everything between these two. Ladybug is scolded and punished for the slightest act of selfishness while Adrien is encouraged and rewarded for being selfish and demanding things. Marinette has to work to be noticed (and sometimes won’t even get that much) while all Adrien has to do is put on his best sad face and the show will bend over backwards to either give him exactly what he wants or make him the sympathetic one through the narrative.

Even if Adrien had known about Marinette’s crush at the time that Ladybug knew about Chat’s, it wouldn’t matter, because the tipped scales in how they’re treated would still make it so Marinette is the one at fault for “dumping her feelings onto Adrien” while Ladybug is still forced to interact with Chat even if his advances make her uncomfortable.

#((It's a good day to choose violence.))#category: salt #salt: adrien agreste #salt: chat noir #salt: love square #((I probably should've done this in video format.))

380 notes · View notes

daydreamingsora-fics · 3 years

Text

Pairing: Post timeskip ex-lover! Miya Atsumu x reader x Post timeskip current lover! Sakusa Kiyoomi

Word count: 1,180

Genre: Angst

<sora's memo> hello, it's been a while~ sorry for being mia. For the past weeks I actually don't feel like writing at all and I just prefer reading. But today is different, after watching this video I got inspired, and I end up writing a short story. I hope you guys are doing well, and are safe! Also I want to inform you guys about something that I've been working onto that I might post it here soon 🤫🤫. Anw, i hope you guys would like this short story that I wrote.

There you are walking down the aisle with a smile, the smile that struck Miya Atsumu’s heart when he first met you in high school. Everyone’s eyes are on you, adoring how beautiful you are, how you look so blooming and fresh on this very special occasion of your life.

But no one adores you like how Atsumu does. He can’t help but to fall in love with you all over again. Heart beating fast as he watches you walk slowly down the aisle. Hands are shaking and a lump is forming on his throat. He feels like tearing up just by looking at how beautiful you are in your wedding dress.

He watches you as you look at your guests, who’ve been part of your life since the very start. There are not many people you invited. You only invited your family, close friends in college and also the former Karasuno Highschool volleyball team of your batch. Then you look forward, your eyes met his golden brown one. And with your eyes meeting, Atsumu went back to memory lane.

He remembered the first time he saw you in the spring tournament which is also the time where he fell in love with you. He remembered how he tried to approach you after their match with Karasuno but got easily rejected. Osamu and Suna even teased him by getting rejected. But he didn’t give up, the next day he tried to approach you again before the match of Karasuno and Nekoma then got rejected again. He tried again and again until you lost it and gave your number to him.

You don’t know how happy he was. He felt like he took 2 to 3 steps of getting closer to you. After that he always contacts you, updating you with everything whether they won or not. It went like that for a while until you realize you’re also falling for this guy. It didn’t take long for the two of you to start dating, and if Atsumu will not tell you that dating you is not the peak of his life then he is absolutely lying. In fact, dating you felt like he is in utopia, everyday felt euphoric. He even reaches to the point of being content with his life, just being with you and achieving his dream as a pro volleyball player.

But not all love stories end with a happy ending and maybe his love story is one of those contrary. Even though everything seems happy and full of love, his relationship with you comes to an end. Everyone was shocked when they knew about it, even him didn’t foresee it. But what will he do now, it’s already done. The two of you have broken up and the only choices for him is to move on.

However, it was not easy for him, he can’t get used to being alone again. He was used to seeing you everyday, taking you on a date and doing most of the stuff together but now he can’t do those things anymore. Atsumu felt so lost. That one person who’s keeping him on track was now out of his life. It took him a while for him to get back on track. He did everything just to feel better and thankfully his friends and family are there to support him.

Later on, you and Atsumu bumped into each other again. You’re with someone, not only a random guy but his teammate in MSBY, Sakusa Kiyoomi. It was awkward, very awkward. Seeing you with his teammate made Atsumu come to a realization on why Omi-kun was being cautious or awkward around him for the past few days. So, to lessen the tension Atsumu is the first one to greet them with a smile and the two relax and greet him back.

After that incident, he and Omi talked after their training. Omi was very careful in telling Atsumu that he is dating you. But just like what Atsumu did before he just smiled and congratulated him.

He remembered how after that talk with Omi, he went straight running to his brother’s restaurant. Telling everything to Osamu, how he bumped into you and Omi, and how Omi told him you two are dating. Atsumu talks and talks as Osamu prepares his meal for him and when Osamu faced his twin brother to serve his food, he saw tears running down Atsumu’s face. The brunette boy looked at his twin sadly and served his food. Osamu felt sorry for his twin brother, he knew how much Atsumu loves you. Even though the two of them argue a lot, he still wishes his brother happiness.

After that event, Atsumu comes back to your life but not as your lover but as your friend. The two of you got to talk about the past and had a closure that you needed. He’s fine with it, as long as he is part of your life. And he did become part of your life again. He was there to see your relationship with Omi grow. He was there to help both you and Omi when the two of you quarreled about something. He either listens to you or Omi complains and gives some advice. He was the first one to know about Omi’s plan proposing to you and the first one to get to know that you said yes. Lastly, he was the first one to get invited to your wedding, not only as a guest but as Omi’s best man.

He even remembered how your eyes sparkled with joy when you told him about your wedding day. Even with Omi, he didn't expect a guy like him would show such emotion when he was offered to be his Best man at his wedding. He wanted to reject the offer but he didn't want to ruin the joy you both felt at that moment, so he accepted the offer.

And here he is right now, standing beside your soon to be husband. When you reach the front of the altar where he and Omi were waiting, you look at him and smile. You reach your hand out and he immediately took it. You gave his hands a squeeze and mouthed “thank you”. At that moment, Atsumu did his very best not to drop a single tear during the best moment of your life. Atsumu just smiled and squeezed your hand back. He then looked at Omi and gave him a pat on his back. Omi looked at him and gave him a smile before taking your hand and walking to the altar.

Atsumu once again felt pain and happiness, just like the time when you show your engagement ring to him. His heart was shattered again as he was not the man you’ll be growing up with but he is content and happy because you fall to someone that will make you feel even more special. Atsumu stepped back and took his seat beside Bokuto. He quietly watched as the ceremony that would change your life forever.

<sora's p.s> I'm supposed to post this on sunday but I can't wait any longer lol

209 notes · View notes

levi-supreme · 2 years

Note

Rei my looooove!! Congratulations on the 500 babyyyyyy!! I’m so so so happy for you and you deserve aaaaallll of us and many many more ❤️❤️

Not like you don’t pamper me enough already. But may i have Oolong and Biscotti, please? 👉🏼👈🏼🥺 i love youuuu ❤️

Characters: Erwin x fem!reader

Prompts: Erwin [oolong] and anniversary date [biscotti]

A/N: Mia my love!!! Thank you so much for your endless support and love! <3 you deserve nothing but tons of love from Erwin Smith himself. I love you too my darling, and I hope you enjoy this one!!!

Also, I have a little surprise for you at the end and I hope you'll like it hehe >//<

Rei's 600 Follower Event: Date-A-Boyfriend (Open until 31 March)

Today was the day of your fifth wedding anniversary and you couldn't be happier. You were excited to spend the day with him, and you couldn't wait to give him his present. Your lovely husband had the entire day's activity planned out; from breakfast in bed to a lovely afternoon at the farmers' market.

"Remember to doll up for dinner," your husband reminded you when he drove back home, unpacking all the things the both of you bought from the market. Erwin told you he was bringing you out for dinner, and he reminded you countless times to dress up and look pretty for the occasion. You've likewise questioned him countless times about the dinner, but your husband refused to say anything.

"How can I dress up for the event when I don't even know what the event is?" You grumbled as you grabbed your towel and went to the bathroom. Erwin chuckled while picking his outfit. Once he found what he wanted, Erwin lay his outfit on the mattress.

"Well, if you really want a hint, look at today's date!" Erwin replied while you gave a muffled response from the shower. Erwin knew you would take a while, and he took the opportunity to sneak into his study and wrapped up something that was hidden in a chest of drawers. Once he heard you come out, Erwin went to use the washroom as you started to blow dry your hair.

"Look at today's date!" You recalled Erwin say. Today's date was your anniversary date. Anniversary.... hmm... oh? You suddenly had an idea. You saw the outfit Erwin lay on the mattress and it confirmed your answer. You rummaged through your wardrobe and found the perfect dress. Slipping it on, you started applying your makeup and styled your hair.

At 7 pm sharp, Erwin and you walked hand in hand into the restaurant, your memory as clear as yesterday as the waiter ushered you both to your seats. The table was next to the floor-to-ceiling windows and had a breathtaking view of the city, just like how you remembered. Erwin told you to look through the menu as he excused himself to the washroom.

While you already decided on what to order, you realised your husband was taking an awfully long time. Just as you looked through your clutch bag to take out your phone, you heard someone calling your name softly from behind.

"Flowers for you, Mrs Smith?" Erwin appeared with a bouquet of no less than 99 roses in his hand. You covered your mouth in shock and felt tears pooling in your eyes. Erwin's humongous rose bouquet was drawing the attention of a few diners, and they turned to your direction excitedly, thinking there might be a proposal taking place.

"On this very special day five years back, I got down on my knee with a ring in my hand, promising you a lifetime of happiness. Five years down the road, I hope I've kept my promise, and your days have been filled with nothing but happiness." Erwin handed over the bouquet to you and you accepted it with shaky hands. Erwin then signalled to one of the staff of the restaurant, and the staff brought over a brown coloured package.

"Five years ago, we were here in this same restaurant, sitting at this very table, wearing the exact same outfit that we are wearing today. But unlike five years ago, you are now here as my wife, and the person I've chosen to spend my lifetime with." Erwin told you to put the bouquet down, and he handed you the bulky package. Erwin also told you to unwrap it. "Happy anniversary, Mia."

Slowly pulling off the brown paper, your tears started to fall uncontrollably as you saw what Erwin gave you. It was a gorgeous wooden photo frame with 'Erwin & Mia Smith' engraved at the top. On the bottom was the date where Erwin proposed to you five years ago. In the frame was a photo of you and Erwin from back then, taken after Erwin proposed with a shiny ring sitting snugly on your ring finger.

"Babe, this is amazing, I love this," your fingers traced the outline of your names on the frame. "How did you think of this gift?"

"U-uh, Levi told me that a five-year wedding anniversary is a wood wedding..." Erwin scratched his neck embarrassingly. "He got the exact same gift for his own wedding anniversary, and I thought you would like—" You stood up and hugged your husband, hoping he understood all your unsaid words and feelings. Swaying on the spot, Erwin slowly rubbed your back. Releasing you from the hug, Erwin leaned down to press a soft kiss on your lips, hugging you close to him. Erwin slowly released you, wiping your tears with his thumb.

"Thank you, sweetheart. I love this very much, it's beautiful," you hugged your husband again, interlocking your arms around his waist. Erwin patted your cheek and kissed your forehead. "I'm glad you like it."

"Since you've given me such a precious gift, it is my turn," you put down the photo frame, taking a few breaths to calm yourself. Erwin looked at you with a puzzled look. You didn't bring along anything with you, and you certainly didn't ask the staff here for help since you didn't know he was bringing you here until a few hours ago. You gazed at Erwin, feeling incredibly nervous out of a sudden. You took a deep breath and looked into Erwin's eyes.

"You're going to be a father."

Tagging: @levi-lover @ack3rlady @hashaneeee @roralore @imkumichan @kristinecharmm @notgoodforlife @jean-prettyboy-kirschtein @sweet-assh0le @hannie2kay @ack3rlevi @levislovingwife @galactict3a @hauntedhousecat @sckerman @thesimpsstuff @ackermandick @greenfurret @jayteacups @nelapanela94 @postwarlevi @levisbrat25

If you would like to be tagged, sign up for the tag list below!

Rei's 600 Follower Event: Date-A-Boyfriend (Open until 31 March)

Rei's 600 Follower Event: Date-A-Boyfriend master list | Rei's Springtime Event grand master list

Event tag list | Rei's tag list

29 notes · View notes

navalcriminalimagines · 3 years

Text

Pairings: Rafael Barba x Reader, Sonny Carisi x Reader

Warnings: none?

Words: 4,511

Prompt: Rafael spent years keeping his feelings for you hiding.

Missed shot

When Rafael Barba started to work with Manhattan’s SVU, you’d been a detective there for almost two years. You joined the squad shortly before Stabler left. You saw Nick Amaro and Amanda Rollins joining in too. At first, Cragen partnered you with Amanda, and Olivia with Nick, but considering it wasn’t working between Liv and Nick, changes were made, and Nick became your partner.

You two quickly became close, like a brother-sister relationship. He told you about his issues with Maria, you were the first (and only one) to know when him and Amanda became a thing. So, obviously, you told him your secret.

“This is Tomas,” you told Nick, as you were showing him a picture of an 8-year-old boy. “My son,” you added. “Don’t bother counting, I did give birth to him when I was 17.”

“He’s cute. Looks a lot like you,” Nick smiled at you. “Nobody in the squad know?” he asked.

“Cragen does. But he’s our Captain and it’s in my file. But the rest, nope,”

“Why not?”

You told him more about your debut in the police. At first, you did hide the fact that you were a mom. But you quickly realized that your coworkers and others were judging you. People took you as immature, non-serious, and some guy actually pictured you as an easy girl. You hated every second of your debut. So, when you joined the bomb squad, you decided to make your son a secret. It’s much better this way.

Olivia learned about your son when she took Cragen’s place. A part of her was surprised, but another wasn’t. She saw you with kids, you do have that mother instinct. And of course, she promised that nobody would know about Tom.

Working with the SVU squad wasn’t an evidence for Rafael Barba. Nick gave him hard time for no apparent reasons, Amanda wasn’t a fan of him. Fin didn’t care much. But luckily, Olivia welcomed him nicely and then there was you. You were sweet to him, kind. You asked him if you whether call him “Rafael” or “Barba” – “Your choice,” he answered. You ask him how he’s doing every time you see him. You usually bring him a coffee when you stopped by his office.

You’re nice, gorgeous, young, smart, badass… it didn’t take long for Rafael to get interested in you. More than just as coworker. But this couldn’t be happening, so he started to stay away from you as much as possible. At first, it was easy since Rafael only sees you as a detective. He doesn’t know anything about you outside of the office, only that you have Swedish origins from your father. He doesn’t want to know more. He doesn’t need to.

But despite himself, he overheard conversations between you and Nick every now and then. When the name “Tom” came back multiple times, Rafael assumed you had a boyfriend. Good. This should make things easier.

For two years working together, you and Rafael had a normal work relationship. He kept his crush under-wrap, seeing people every now and then, when the thought of you was too much. Sometimes it was one-night stands, sometimes a bit more. But he never kept seeing the same person for more than two months. That’s when people want to make things more permanent. Rafael doesn’t want that.

Keeping you at arm’s length was perfect for him. He couldn’t let you in. He wasn’t open for a serious relationship, and he felt like you could turn his world upside down if he let you in.

He almost did when Nick got shot. You were very worried for your partner, Rafael almost hugged you when you started to cry in front of him. But Liv called at the same point, so he didn’t. And then Nick left SVU, and New York. His departure hurt you a lot, for a moment, Rafael thought you two had some kind of an intimate relationship. But he remembered a conversation you two had.

“Hey Barba, we’re going out for drinks. Wanna join?” you casually asked.

“What’s the occasion?”

“Okay, first, do you need an occasion to go out for drinks? And second, it’s just that Nick needs to get his mind off the breakup,”

“So, it’s definitely over between him and his wife?”

“Yeah, she’s moving to DC with Zara. He’s not doing great,”

“But he can always count on his other partner,” Rafael said, without thinking.

You chuckled, “What does that mean?”

“You two are—close,” Hopefully, it didn’t sound like jealousy. Which it actually was.

“Amanda is the one he slept with, not me. I’d rather sleep with you,” you left right after.

This was months ago, but Rafael still couldn’t believe you said that. He tried not to overthink about it, but he couldn’t. Was this just a joke? Were you just trying to prove a point? Or did you see him as more than just a coworker? He considered trying to explore this, but before he found the courage to do something about it, Sonny Carisi joined the squad and became your partner.

You missed Nick a lot, but you welcomed Sonny with open arms, unlike the others at first. He will forever be thankful about that. It didn’t take long for Rafael to see that you had a bond with Sonny, just like the bond you had with Nick. Maybe more. Liv told him a few times that being partners when you’re a cop is very special. He understands that, but it doesn’t he likes it when it comes to you.

Few months after Sonny join in, Rafael heard the name Tom again. You must have to Sonny about your boyfriend. Since he didn’t hear that name for months, he assumed that you two had broken up. But apparently not. Meaning that there’s nothing romantic with Carisi, but you still have a boyfriend. So, Rafael tried to forget what you told him and kept trying to convince himself that what he’s feeling for you isn’t love.

More months went by. It was obvious for Rafael that Carisi had a thing for you. He didn’t like it, but there’s nothing he can do. But he kept turning down all of your offers when the squad met up for drinks. He didn’t need that. He didn’t want to know the you outside work.

One day, he showed up to the precinct. No one was nowhere to be find. He spotted a gift wrapped on your desk. Curious, he took a closer look. There was a card. He looked around, still no one. So, he tried to take a look at the card.

“That’s very noisy of you, counselor,” he heard for behind. You. He jumped from the surprise, let go of the card.

“A box on a detective’s desk. Had to be sure it wasn’t a bomb,” he said, trying to keep a straight face. You laughed at his excuse.

“Would love to see your reaction if you saw a bomb,” you said, with a smile on your face. Apparently, you aren’t mad, so that’s good.

“I’d rather not,” he shyly smiled at you. “What would your reaction be?”

“Considering that I’ve been there before, I would keep my calm and do my best to defuse it,” you said before walking to the coffee area. Rafael analyzed your words for a moment before joining you.

“Come again?”

“Spent two years with the bomb squad before joining SVU,” you casually said, handing him the cup of coffee you just poured.

In four years, this was the first personal information you gave him. He almost couldn’t believe it.

“I—I didn’t know,”

“Well, yeah. We never talked about anything else than our cases,”

“True,” he took a sip. “And why would that be? In your opinion,”

“Because you don’t like me,”

You had poured another cup for yourself and walked up straight to your desk after those words. You sat, grabbed the gift to put it aside and started to look at something on your computer. Rafael was stunned for a moment but joined you again. He closed your laptop, and leaned against your desk, right next to you. He had never been this physically close to you before.

“Why in the world would you think that?” He asked.

“We’ve been working together for four years, Barba. Not once, did you show some kind of interest in me. You’re best friends with Liv, you tolerate Amanda, you’re courteous with Fin. Hell, you gave hard time to Sonny for the first year but now you agreed for him to shadow you. But me? I feel like you wish I wasn’t here,”

Rafael stayed silent for a moment, analyzing your words. Indeed, he tried to keep his distance with you, but he never thought it made you feel that way. He felt very bad about himself.

“But hey, no problem, okay? We’ve been able to make it work that way for years, there’s no reasons we can’t keep going,”

“You’re very wrong—about everything, Y/N.”

“Then what is it?” You locked your sweet blue eyes into his. For a moment, he was afraid you may see all the love he has for you in his eyes. What reasonable excuse could he tell you? His mind raced. But thankfully, the rest of the squad came back at that moment.

“Barba, Y/N. Are you interrupting?” Rollins smiled.

“Nope,” Rafael stood up right and followed Liv into her office. You watched him leave. No answer. Again.

The gift was actually from Sonny, but it wasn’t for you. It’s for Tomas, who’s now 13 years old. The father left when you told him you were pregnant (he was a bit older) and never saw him again. You raised Tom by yourself, with the full support of your parents, luckily. Your son showed up his interest in makeup and esthetic about a year ago. You completely support him in his passion, brought him whatever he needed/wanted.

Sonny went shopping with his 16 years old niece Mia during the weekend and she wanted to go to the Sephora. He asked her what he could offer to Tomas.

“Uncle Sonny. Are you trying to seduce the mother by being so nice to the son?” Mia asked with a smirk on her face.

“Okay, first, I wouldn’t need to do that. And second, it’s just that—it’s not easy to be different. I just want him to know that he can count on me,”

“Like you wished you could count on someone when you realized you were bisexual?”

Sonny looked at his niece with wide eyes. He still isn’t out to his family. How could she know? “Last year, I figured that this Sam you talked about wasn’t a she but a he. And--I’m bi, too, Uncle Sonny.”

That’s a lot to process in two minutes, while he is standing in the middle of a makeup store.

“There’s nothing wrong with that…right?” Mia added.

“Oh, of course not, sweetheart!” He immediately answered. “When did you know?”

“I was sure when I fell in love with a girl, a few months ago,” she confessed.

Sonny hugged his niece and kissed her hair. “What’s her name? I’d love to meet her,”

“Joy. And that would be nice. I’m so happy I finally told you,”

“I’ll never judge you. And I’ll always be there for you,”

In the squad, you were the only one Sonny came out to. Which makes the two of you even closer.

After the gift “incident”, you and Rafael didn’t talk again for weeks. To be fair, he was trying to avoid you. He almost confessed his feelings for you and that can’t be happening. After this, Rafael decided to call back a woman he used to see. She’s beautiful, smart, nice and wants the same things he does. Exactly what he needs.

He never wanted to talk about his personal life at work, but one day, you showed up in his office. Rafael was on the phone, his back to the door. He didn’t hear you come in, so he kept making plans with Judith. You listened, and felt your chest tightened.

Before he hung up, Rafael heard the door of his office closing. He turned around; nobody was there but he saw you walking out through the blinds. You had heard and walked away.

When Rafael told you, you were wrong about your assumptions, you thought that maybe he was feeling the same way you did. Turns out, you were wrong.

It was Tom’s 14th birthday. You helped him planned an afternoon party. He told you he invited about 10 friends.

But no one showed up. Your son didn’t feel ashamed about his passion - thanks to you and Sonny, mostly - but apparently, his “friends” didn’t like it.

“Baby, why didn’t you tell me they were bullying you? On Monday I’ll go see your principal,”

“Exactly for this. If you do this, it’s gonna be worse. Maybe I should stop,”

“Stop what? Doing something you like? Not under my watch, T. Those kids are just the reflections of their close-minded parents,”

“Yeah, but at least people show up to their birthday parties,”

It broke your heart to see your son like this. You needed to fix this. You need to see your son happy. All day, every day. You went to the bathroom and called Sonny.

“Sonny, I need you,” you said when he answered. “Short things first, those stupid kids didn’t show up to T’s party. There’s no one here. Can you come? With Mia? And Joy? I’m gonna call Liv, see if she can come with Noah,”

“I’m with Mike right now so he’ll be with me. Call Fin too, we’ll stop by Amanda’s to pick her and Jesse,”

“Okay, that’s great, thanks Sonny,”

“Of course. Tom will remember his 14th birthday I promise. Why don’t you call Barba too?”

“Why in the world would I do that?”

“It would be rude not to. Don’t you think?”

“I guess. I’ll see. Can you be there in about an hour?”

You call Liv and she agreed, same for Fin. But Sonny was right, you had to call Rafael.

“Barba,” he answered.

“Hey, it’s Y/N. Sorry to bother you on Saturday afternoon. Um—if you aren’t busy, what do you think about stopping by my son’s birthday? It’s kinda unfair, but stupid kids didn’t show up. I call everyone, they’re all coming. But hey, don’t feel obligated. You don’t have to if you don’t—“

“Okay,” he answered before you could finish your monologue.

“Okay?” You repeated.

“Yeah. When should I be there? And how old is he?”

“I said an hour to everyone. And if you’re asking his age to buy him a gift, don’t bother. Right now, all he needs is people to be there to celebrate,”

“Y/N, don’t make me argue please. How old is your son?”

“14.”

“Okay, thanks. See you in an hour then. Text me the address, please,”

“See you, Rafael,”

Rafael tried to stay calm and natural in front of Judith, but there were some many things in his head right now. Since he went to the bedroom to answer your call, he lied to the woman he was with, pretending a work emergency to leave.

You have a kid. A teenage kid, actually. A quick count made him realized you gave birth when you were 17. Many things made sense now. He needs confirmation but it seems clear that, this Tom he heard about, is actually your son, and not your boyfriend like he assumed.

How could he not know about this? You’ve been working together for almost five years now. He really kept his distance with you. But somehow, he still fell hard for you.

“Hey Liv, I got a call from Y/N. I’d like to buy a little something for her son, do you have any idea?”

“Well, do you know anything about makeup?”

“I beg your pardon?”

Liv laughed. “Where are you? I can pick you up and we stop by a store to buy him something,”

“Okay, I trust you on that.”

An hour later, everybody was there. You welcomed them as they arrived. “If he doesn’t like it, that’s on Liv,” Rafael joked as he handed you the gift he had for your son.

“Nope. That’s on that sells woman that was clearly hitting on you,” Liv interjected.

“She wasn’t— okay, she was. But not my type,”

“Yeah, and Judith probably wouldn’t like it,”

“I don’t know about that. And she doesn’t need to know anyway,” he smiled.

Tom’s mood improved when he saw Mia and Joy. You and Sonny introduced them months ago and Tomas is crazy about them.

“What happened to your face?” Mia asked and Tom frowned. “No makeup, seriously T?” She added, before taking him by the hand.

“Wait—“ you stopped them before they reached the bedroom. “Tomas, meet Mike and Rafael, first. They are the only ones you haven’t met yet,”

It made sense that Tom hadn’t met Mike yet, since he joined SVU a couple of months ago. But yeah, it stings to Rafael. Five years. And he didn’t know.

“You look like a cop,” he said Mike, “but you don’t,” he then said to Rafael.

“Cause I’m not. I’m an ADA, Assistant Dis—“

“I know what it is,” he cut him. “Thank you for coming,”

“Can we do his makeup now?” Mia called out and the three of them — adding Jesse who wanted to go too — disappeared in the bedroom for a moment.

“Thanks, guys, for showing up this quick. It’s a mess,” you sadly said. “T told me that he’s being bullied at school because he loves makeup, lets his hair grow. Apparently, they are calling him a sissy,” your jaw clenched. Rafael saw the mama bear in you. “He doesn’t want me to interfere. But maybe I should anyway,”

“You’re here for him. We all are, that’s what he needs,” Sonny said, wrapping his arm around your shoulders to bring you comfort. Rafael tried to avoid the jealousy in his belly.

Opening gifts arrived fast. Everyone brought him something, mostly makeup stuff. Sonny actually got him an appointment in a famous hair salon in Manhattan. Now that his hair is long enough, Tom mentioned wanting to get a real haircut. Mike listened to Sonny’s advices for his gift.

“This is from Nick,” Liv said as she gave Tom a gift. “He wants you to call later,”

“Mom!! That’s two tickets for California!” Tomas exclaimed before reading the note. “And he’s offering me surfing lessons! When are we going? Before—“

“Soon, my love.” You said before he could finish his sentence.

Then came Rafael’s gift. “You can return it if you don’t like,” he said. But Tom’s face lit up when he saw what it was.

“Mom!!!” He showed you the gift, with a huge grin on his face.

“Wow! You finally got it,” you returned his smile and moved a little to stand by Rafael’s side.

“Thank you so much, Rafael!” Tom stood up and hugged the ADA. Some affection Rafael didn’t expect.

“He’s been bugging me for this palette for weeks. I told him to wait because it’s damn expensive,” you whispered to Rafael.

“It’s okay. I’m glad he likes it,” he just answered.

Tomas was thrilled with all of his gifts. It feels good that with those people, he doesn’t have to hide himself, who he is and what he loves. Later, you noticed that Rafael setback from the others. You stood next to him.

“You’re not mad about the gift, are you?” He asked, before you could say anything.

“A little, to be honest,”

“I can pay for that,”

“I know. I see your clothes every day. But that’s not the point,”

“Then what is the point?”

“For the first five years of his life, I couldn’t buy him things. All the toys he had were gifts from my parents— when I made better money, I spoiled him. For years. And now, he’s a very smart teenage boy but he doesn’t necessarily have the value of money. Which I’m trying to teach him. And you showed up with this hella expensive palette, Nick got him plane tickets and surfing lessons. Even the appointment Sonny got him is expensive. That’s not helping,”

“Great,” he smiled, and you shot him a glare, “you’re not actually mad at me, but more at yourself,”

“Don’t do this. You’re not a parent, Rafael,”

“Indeed,” he took a deep breath, “And how come did I do not know you were one?”

“This will just bring us back to our convo from February, don’t you think? And we both know how it ended,”

“We were interrupted,”

“And you’ve been avoiding me ever since,”

So, you noticed that. You always noticed things. He hates that about you. He intensely looked at you, not knowing what to say exactly.

“But don’t worry, Barba, you won’t have to use force for that anymore,” you gently patted his shoulder and joined the others. “My love, do you mind if I steal your thunder for a moment?” You asked your son.

“Nope. Are you going to tell them?”

You looked at Liv for approval and signed Rafael to come closer, which he did. Everybody waited for you to talk. “I—I’m leaving SVU,” you said. There were gasps, widen eyes and Sonny choked on his beer. “Don’t die yet, Sonny. I haven’t finished,” you paused. “It’s no secret that my father was born in Sweden and move here after he fell in love with my mum,”

That, Rafael did know. You talked about your Swedish origins. “After my mum died, my father moved back there. And he’s been bugging us to come with him and considering I’ve always promised this one,” you said, playing with Austin’s hair, “that we would try to live there for a while, I’m actually taking a sabbatical. And next month, we’re flying to Sweden. But we’ll stop by California first, apparently,”

Only Liv knew. So, it came as a shock to everyone else.

The mood changed after that. They were all happy but also sad to see you and Tom leave. Mostly Sonny. It was very rare to witness a silent Sonny Carisi, but this was it. One by one, people started to leave the party. Mia and Joy took your son to the bowling alley. Rafael wanted to be the last so he could have a talk with you, but apparently, Sonny had the same thing in mind.

Rafael was helping you cleaning up the apartment when you noticed Sonny, on your small balcony. “How long has he been there?” You asked Rafael, who just raised his shoulders, clearly annoyed. You joined Sonny, not knowing that Rafael could hear everything you two were talking about.

“You okay there, Sonshine?” Sonny chuckled.

“A bit stunned, I guess.” He said, not looking at you.

“Yeah, I’m sorry. I—I was afraid to tell you,”

“Why?”

“Because of what happened a few months ago. Because I’m scared to leave you. Because—I was afraid to change my mind after I told you,”

He finally looked at you. “I’ll never hold you back, Y/N. You know that? You talk so much about Sweden, so does Tom. I’m not completely surprised,”

“Under different circumstances—“ you said, letting the silence says the rest. Sonny turned to his side, so he was facing you.

“I was okay with being your second choice, Y/N, as long as you chose me. But you’re also leaving to be away from him, aren’t you?”

You nodded. “I don’t want to promise you anything, Sonny. But maybe—after that year away—“

He knew what you meant. Sonny put his hand on your cheek, softly caressing your skin with his thumb. Before he could lean in to kiss you, you both heard the balcony window opening. Rafael was standing there. “Who’s your first choice, Y/N?” He just asked. Sonny loudly sighed and turned his back to the lawyer.

“Not important, Rafael.”

“Por favor— answer me.”

“You, idiot,” Sonny muttered, still looking over Manhattan.

“Can—can you come inside for a moment, please?” Rafael asked.

“Don’t worry, I’m leaving,” Sonny said, and turned around to kiss your forehead, “Don’t make anything stupid. Call me,” he kissed your forehead again and walked past Rafael to leave.

“Great timing, Barba,” you sighed.

“I—I don’t understand,” he struggled to say.

“You may be a smart-ass lawyer but when it comes to relationships, you’re very dumb,”

“How long have you—?”

“Been in love with you? About three years. Somehow, the more you pushed me away, the more it made me fall,”

“I pushed you away only because I was scared. Scared of the things I feel for you,”

“You can’t—you can’t confess your love to me as I’m leaving the States, Rafael. That’s not fair,”

“If I don’t do it now, when am I supposed to do it? Over the phone while you’re in Sweden? Or when you come back and choose Carisi?” He paused. “Did you guys sleep together or something?”

“Definitely none of your business,” you said. “And you had five years. Five fucking years, during which all you did was making me feel like a burden for you,”

“I—I never meant to do that. I’m sorry,”

“It’s too late, Rafael. I’m leaving anyway,”

“I’ll wait for you if you ask me to,”

“I’m not. Just like I won’t ask that to Sonny,”

“Then—what? What do we do?”

“Nothing. I’m leaving with my boy in a few weeks, maybe I’ll come back next year, or maybe I won’t. And everybody goes on with their life,”

“Are you saying that I missed my shot with you?”

“Probably,”

This will be hard to swallow. Rafael probably never will, to be honest. But one thing is sure, he couldn’t miss his last chance to kiss you. He closed the gap between your bodies, and slowly put his hands on each side of your face. Since you weren’t pushing him away, he took it as a permission and leaned in to kiss you. He softly put his lips on yours. Right here, right now, on your balcony, nothing else mattered but you and him.

Things escalated quickly. The kiss got more intense, and you used force to make him step back into your apartment. Still kissing each other, Rafael slid his hands on your butt and your legs, gently squeezing to signal you to jump in his arms, which you did. He pulled away briefly, just to ask you which one was your bedroom.

He laid you down on the bed, clothes quickly fly across the room. This probably wouldn’t change a thing, but Rafael made love to you as if his life depends on it.

Indeed, it didn’t change a thing. Two weeks later, you and Tomas flew to California, spent two weeks there with Nick, before flying to Sweden.

Part two, anyone?

#rafael barba #rafael barba imagine #rafael barba x reader #rafael barba fanfiction #rafael barba fic #sonny carisi #sonny carisi x reader #sonny carisi imagine #sonny carisi x you #nick amaro #law and order svu #law and order x reader #law and order fanfiction

215 notes · View notes

ethanesimp · 3 years

Text

DON’T BURN THE PANCAKES // E.T.

Pairing: Ethan Torchio x GN! Reader

Summary: Your daughter’s idea of cooking breakfast for you doesn’t go as well as she’d hoped for.

Warnings: Just swearing, this is pure fluff

Word Count: 3.1k

Masterlist // Taglist link in bio

Taglist: @superchrystaldrug @ethaneskin @dont-let-me-drown-in-you @bidet-and-legolas @gretavanfleetlove @victoriadeangeliswifey @selenophiliaxx @tabi-toast @queen-of-brokenhearts @ohtorchio @geklutst-ei @soraya825 @juststalking @cruz-ata

A/N: I will not accept any criticism on me calling his child Marlena. I thought it was cute and maybe something one of the band members would eventually do? I hope this is cute enough and that it doesn’t suck? My brain is completely fried from school so yeah!

The sky was slowly starting to get painted orange and birds had just begun chirping when Ethan was woken up by someone poking his cheek repeatedly. He'd been trying to ignore it, but the little lady doing it was persistent and wouldn't back down until she saw him open his brown eyes.

So, with a quiet groan as to not wake you, he gently removed the arm that was wrapped around your waist and turned around to look at the little girl who was sitting down on the bed, patiently waiting for him to wake up.

He offered her a lopsided smile and ruffled up her messy dark brown hair. She giggled and pushed his hand away, "Stop it, daddy!" She squealed. Ethan brought a finger to his lips and pointed at you sleeping peacefully beside him.

She nodded and shot him an apologetic smile. Ethan shook his head and got up from the bed. He lifted her into his arms without much effort and carried her out of your shared bedroom. He closed the door behind him and turned to kiss her cheek, "Good morning cara mia."

"Good morning daddy," She mumbled and nuzzled her face into his chest as she yawned.

Ethan laughed lightly, "Still tired Mar?" She immediately shook her head no and asked him to let her down. When he did, little Marlena took his hand in hers and dragged him to the kitchen as quickly as her little feet would allow.

It was your birthday today and, just like every year, she'd come up with a plan to give you something special and had asked Ethan for help. He'd taken her to the mall a few days back so she could pick up a present and the night before after you went to bed, he'd stayed up with Marlena to help her make your birthday card. All that was left were the pancakes she wanted to make you because, according to her, cakes were already overdone and you deserved something different and special, just like you.

Her statement had warmed Ethan's heart and he agreed without complaint even if he was aware of just how difficult it'd be to clean the kitchen after they were done. She was always so excited about giving you both presents on any occasion she got and he wouldn’t deny either of you the joy you’d surely feel for Marlena’s little gesture.

Ethan set her down on the counter and went to retrieve the pancake mix they’d bought while at the mall, “Okay, so what do you want to do? I’ve got the heart molds you asked for. Would you like to use them or should we just make some normal ones?”

She shook her head and pointed at the red heart-shaped cookie cutter that sat on the counter, “I think they’d like the hearts better,” He nodded in agreement and starting collecting the bowl and spoon they’d need to mix the batter.

He stood there and silently watched her mix everything together as music softly played from his phone which was sitting beside her on the counter. Ethan found himself nodding his head along to the songs he’d heard countless times on the cartoons Marlena watched every morning.

When finished, his daughter tilted the bowl towards him. Ethan smiled and gave her a thumbs up. He quickly greased one of the large pans, placed the heart-shaped mold on it, and poured a bit of the pancake mixture in. He repeated the process a few times until the whole pan was covered.

Right after he was done, loud cries were heard from the nursery. Ethan cursed under his breath and turned to Marlena, “I’ll be right back amore. Just stay there and please don’t go near the stove, kay?”

After receiving a nod, Ethan rushed out of the room and up the stairs. He walked into the nursery you’d both painted a pale yellow a few months back. He leaned down in front of the little cot and picked up the six-month-old baby girl wrapped in a little green blanket.

Ethan brought her close to his chest as he slowly moved his weight from one foot to the other and gently swayed his fingers side to side. She slowly started to quiet down and instead, a small smile appeared on her face at the sight of her dad. He cooed when she reached up for him with her tiny hands.

Unfortunately for him, all that peace lasted for merely a few minutes because then she started crying as loud as she could. He tried to sway her just a bit harder as he looked around the room for her pacifier so she’d quiet down while he got her bottle ready, otherwise, you’d be woken up and the surprise would be ruined.

Ethan sighed in relief when he spotted the little blue thing sitting on top of the dresser. However, his face fell as he turned to grab it and saw you leaning on the doorway out of the corner of his eye.

He turned around and offered you a small smile. You rubbed your eye and yawned, still exhausted, as you walked closer to him and took her from his arms, “I’ve got it tesoro, don’t worry. I can go get her a bottle.”

Ethan quickly shook his head, “No N/N, please let me. It’s your birthday and you should relax,” He insisted, hoping you’d just agree so he wouldn’t have to spoil Marlena’s surprise.

You raised an eyebrow in amusement at his words but nodded anyway, “Fine. I’ll accept because I wouldn’t mind a little nap,” You mumbled and carefully handed him the baby. You’d heard him and little Marlena talk about your surprise, but who were you to ruin it? Instead, you’d just go back to bed and wait for your little angel to bring you breakfast.

Before you could leave the room, Ethan grabbed your hand and pulled you close to him. He quickly kissed your forehead, “Happy birthday, amore mio. We can celebrate later, yeah?” He teased and playfully smacked your ass. You shook your head and laughed at his antics before leaving the room.

He walked down the stairs with the baby in his arms only to find his other daughter pouting as she sat on the counter, waiting for him to return. She pointed at the stove, where the pancakes sat, with smoke coming out of the pan and all that was in it was now a dark color.

Ethan sighed and dumped the pan on the sink with his free hand. Then he opened all the windows and swatted at the air with a towel to try and dissipate the smoke before it reached the fire detector and the alarm went off.

Ethan turned to look at his daughter, who was still pouting and looked almost on the verge of tears. He delicately cupped her cheek, “Hey, it’s okay. I’ll clean this up and then I’ll give you stuff to make more batter, okay?” She nodded and smiled gratefully at him. Ethan nodded and stood up straight as he felt the baby in his arms begin to stir.

He quickly gathered all the ingredients and placed them by the counter for his daughter to measure and mix. Ethan had taught her to cook the most basic things like eggs and pancakes ever since she was younger. Now she insisted on doing most things, like mixing or measuring ingredients, by herself.

He rushed to prepare the bottle for the baby as Marlena stayed distracted singing along to the music playing from his phone and mixed the pancake batter once again. Ethan moved around the room with ease, already used to doing things around the house while he held a baby in his arm.

Once they’d finished, Marlena insisted on carefully carrying the plate filled with pancakes and neatly chopped fruit up to your room while he carried the coffee, your birthday card, and present in his free hand. It was a bit hard and he had to walk up the stairs at a remarkably slow pace, but he managed anyway.

Even if things hadn’t gone that great at first, your reaction upon receiving your breakfast and letter, and how happy your daughter looked made everything worth it in Ethan’s mind. He loved the three of you more than words could ever express and he’d be willing to do anything only to see you smile.

#ethan torchio x reader #ethan torchio x you #ethan torchio x y/n #ethan torchio fanfiction #maneskin x reader #maneskin fanfiction #scheduled

116 notes · View notes

maythewidowtakeusall · 3 years

Text

The Ghost

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x reader

Word count: 1469

Summary: Nat tells Tony about her own Winter Soldier she’s trying to find

Warnings: alcohol, murder

Nat watches intently, lips pursed, brows furrowed, shoulders tense. The screen reflects in her green eyes, two blinking lights in the otherwise dark living area. Her knuckles are white from holding onto the edge of the counter too tight.

Too many bad memories. Too many sharp feelings, like shrapnels buried beneath her skin, cutting into her every time she moves.

Steve isn’t the only one with ghosts. Ghosts that used to walk and breathe and talk and kill.

James Buchanan Barnes is MIA. Sam keeps looking for him while she and the rest of the Avengers clean out the last Hydra holdouts in search of Loki’s sceptre. The Winter Soldier is once more a spectre, but she can still feel the pain in all of the scars he left behind. Whenever she looks into the mirror, she knows she’s met him. She knows he was real.

She can’t say the same about you.

Natasha will never forget the first time she saw you during her KGB years. Like a block of marble, you seemed to her. Perfectly cold. Perfectly indestructible, even by time. She didn’t know then what she knows now, that the super soldier serum they pumped into you actually made you resist the very decay of the passing of time. She sometimes wishes that, on sleepless nights such as this. It would be easier to think you were dead. Easier to think that the person who trained with her, the person who made sure she survived all her missions, who started filling her head with doubt slowly but surely, and who, in the very end, helped her escape the shackles of her old life, was no more. Because whenever she is reminded of the fact that you’re out there somewhere, she wishes she could drop everything and dash out into the world to find you.

And yet she hasn’t seen you since. Her last hazy memory of you is your fraying conditioning, the way you look at her, straight at her, as a person, not as the weapon Hydra made you to be. Your face is tortured, as if you were fighting something on the inside. And you’re telling her to run.

She never stopped running.

She flew straight into the arms of SHIELD. And when that fell apart, the Avengers. Even now, she feels like running, though she doesn’t know where to. Where are you? Who are you? And why did you let her slip through your fingers when you were sent to kill her before she could switch sides?

The old security footage is grainy, but it’s clear enough to see you, precise like a surgeon, as you eliminate your target. In a way, it is almost beautiful how you kill. Like a ballerina dancing The Dying Swan impeccably. Never missing a step. Never faltering. Gliding through the hardest moves with graceful ease. Natasha was an assassin for a long time, and despite having changed, she still values skill. But in your case, she values the person underneath all that training and brainwashing more. Not that she knows you really. She doesn’t know where you come from. What your real name is. All she knows is that you saved her. And she would save you too, if she knew how to begin.

“Do you always look at videos of assassinations before bed or is tonight a special occasion?”

“I thought you and Banner were busy playing with your sceptre,” Natasha fires back defensively, dropping her phone on the counter as she locks the screen.

“We are,” Tony acquiesces with a small frown as he joins her by the bar. “However, it is currently 3.36am, and Banner is being a little – am I allowed to say bitch? I don’t even know anymore.”

“Steve’s already gone to bed,” Nat smirks, pouring Stark a drink too.

“Thank god for that. Anyways, you’re dodging my question. Who was that in the video?”

“I’m not dodging your question because you didn’t ask before.” Her lips wrap around the edge of her glass, and the whiskey slides down her throat like poison as she tilts her head back a little. It burns, just like speaking about you always does. “I used to work with her before.”

“Before?”

“Before SHIELD.”

Tony’s lips form a silent “o” before he drinks too. He looks tired, Nat thinks silently. Then again, don't they all? Banner is tearing himself apart constantly, and when he isn’t, it’s because he’s tearing the world apart. Thor is worried about cleaning up the mess Loki has left behind. Steve and Sam, like partners in crime, keep searching for the Winter Soldier in vain, stretching themselves too thin. Clint is, well, he is still Clint, thank god for that. He is still blabbering about which room he will renovate in his house next, and that’s a constant reassurance Nat’s grown to rely on.

“So… What’s the deal with Evelyn Salt? Is there a chance we’re going to bump into her?”

Natasha shakes her head as she squares her shoulders, the muscles in her back flexing as she sits up properly. No sleep tonight then. “She was sent to kill me when I defected. But… for some reason, she decided to let me go. As for running into her, I highly doubt that. Hydra’s files mark her as MIA. She hasn’t been seen since 1997. It wouldn’t surprise me if she was dead and swept under the rug. If I had a brainwashed super soldier agent go AWOL, I would want to tie up the loose ends too.”

“Did you just say super soldier? As if I didn’t have my hands full with old man Rogers already…” Tony grimaces.

“To be fair, she’s more on the Winter Soldier side. In fact, she didn’t have another name either. She was the Winter Soldier too when they needed her to be.”

“Sounds reassuring. No wonder you can’t sleep at night, knowing she could be out there.”

Natasha can’t help but smirk at the irony of that. “True, but the real reason behind that couldn’t be further from what you’re thinking. I’m not afraid of her. I want to find her. Help her, if I can.”

“I always knew there was a reason why you didn’t date, but this wasn’t exactly what I was expecting.”

Natasha’s elbow between his ribs isn’t something he’s foreseen either, but the hiss that slips past his lips is a thin satisfaction. “It’s not like that… Well, it could never be like that in the first place anyways.”

“Yeah. Brainwashed and personality don’t exactly go hand in hand. Got you,” Tony sighs, slumping on his forearms as he glances out at the city lights. For a while, they simply sit together, both deep in thought. Missing person, missing breakthrough, and yet they feel the same frustration that can only stem from an unhealthy amount of helplessness. Tony is struggling to save the whole world; Natasha wishes she could save only a single person in it. And yet their silence couldn’t feel more similar. Their quiet moment in the small hours of the morning couldn’t be more comforting.

“Well,” Tony clears his throat eventually as he glances at his watch. He knocks back his drink before stretching. “That sceptre won’t decipher its secrets on its own, alas.”

“Have you tried asking it nicely?”

“Maybe I will,” the man sighs as he reaches behind the bar to pull the entire bottle of whiskey out as he stands. “But I’m not that desperate. Well, not yet anyways.”

“The night is still young.”

“Plenty of time for more of your bedtime stories,” Tony points to Natasha’s abandoned phone before walking away. He does pause after a few steps though. He is really an asshole sometimes, Pepper is unfortunately right, as she always is. How often has Nat opened up to him so easily? Is he really going to discourage her by being an ass?

“Why don’t you send me those videos later, huh?” he comes to halt, pretending to play it cool as if he didn’t know how much his offer truly means to the both of them. “I’ll have Jarvis run a facial recognition scan. If she’s alive and out there somewhere, we’ll find her.”

“Why? So you can bring her in?”

“So you could help her,” he corrects her. His face is dominated by the meaningful look emanating from his tired brown eyes. There’s a strange sort of understanding there, even if it lacks the depth she feels in Steve when they talk about you and Bucky.

“It’s nice to have friends,” Natasha smiles up at Tony. Tired, defences worn down. Worried. The promise of an impending explanation set for a later conversation sitting in the green of her eyes. “And I would like her to know what it feels like too.”

#natasha romanoff x reader #black widow x female reader #black widow x reader #natasha romanoff fanfiction #marvel mcu #mcu fanfiction #tony stark

181 notes · View notes

bobohu4eva · 3 years

Text

Pink Lace - Chapter 7 (M)

Characters: Baekhyun x Reader (feat. EXO members)

Genre: College AU, stripper AU, fluff, smut, slow burn

Summary: Baekhyun, a philosophy professor with mysterious wealth, got himself completely fucked over a girl who can’t let him into her life.

Word count: 4.4k

Warnings: sex work, mentions of sexual assault, adult themes/situations, smut (nothing too wild this time)

Tag list: @smolbeanmika @leave-me-in-the-summertime @totallynerdstuff @bbhmystar @nana-banana @kimyhappy @thegreatandi @geniusloey @deligxt @baekswifey @bbhyun506 @lovebuginlove @bellamendoza @baekyeonoreo @bobohumyonlyboo @wooya1224 @strawbaeri-s

Masterlist

Friday went by in a blur. You finally wrote your essay, which was sent to Baekhyun after you got home from class. Class. It had been hard. Really hard. The material was challenging too, but you were more focused on how sexy Baekhyun looked in his nice professor clothes. How had you gotten this lucky? You laughed like an idiot when he saw you and innocently pulled down the hem of his shirt with one eyebrow raised at you, making fun of the marks he had so graciously placed on your neck. Lucas had seemed to notice the marks as well, since he seemed weirdly focused on his work and didn’t speak to you at all, a nice change from his usual nagging about why you wouldn’t text him back.

You couldn’t stop thinking about work the next day. Baekhyun would be there again of course, and this would be the first time for you to see him there after admitting your feelings. It gave you whiplash how quickly your opinion of him had changed in such a short time, but you had no regrets. If the last two weeks had taught you anything, it was to not second guess yourself. You were ready to get in there and give the man the lap dance of his damn life, and hopefully more. Oh how you looked forward to it.

Saturday morning, you got down to business. Of course you always tried to look a little extra nice when he’d been there in the past, but today was the real deal. You needed to be fully exfoliated, face-masked, and beautiful. There was no such thing as over preparing. Not today. You even used one of those bath bombs with glitter in it so your whole body would shimmer under the club lights.

You made a point of it to wear the same outfit you’d worn the first night he’d met you; a baby pink lace bodysuit with generous cutouts, a thong, and sparkly white heels.

You left ample time to make sure your hair and makeup would be perfect as well. For the hair you’d opted to keep it down and add a little bit of curl, as for makeup, you wanted to positively sparkle. For the first time since you’d started working as a dancer, you tasked Mia with doing your makeup since she was more skilled at it than you.

“So you want a lot of glitter and glowy-ness, right?” She asked as she dabbed foundation on your cheeks.

“Just make me look like the goddess I am.” You said, closing your eyes and smiling at her expectantly, waiting for her to continue beating your face.

“Got it boss.”

After what felt like forever, she finally turned you around to look in the mirror. Your jaw dropped. She’d done your makeup before for stuff like prom when you guys were younger, but she had really outdone herself this time.

Your skin looked like it was glowing from within, with flecks of holographic glitter sparkling every color of the rainbow across your cheeks. Your eyeliner was perfect, and she’d even overlined your lips a bit and added some highlight onto them to make them look extra kissable. It wasn’t too much, just the perfect amount to spice up your features and make you feel like a million bucks.

“Holy shit Mia I love you. I look hot.”

“You’re really gonna give him a hard time tonight.” She winked at you, and you decided you wanted to give him a bit of a preview, tease the man a little.

You and Baekhyun had been texting each other pretty consistently for the last couple days already. You slipped into your designated outfit for the night and took a few pictures to send him, only showing little parts of you at a time. You selected your two favorites, and hit send.

You: (5:46pm) I can’t wait to see you later ;)

Baekhyun: (5:52pm) Holy fuck. You know what that outfit does to me.

You grinned down at your phone at his reaction, heart fluttering and butterflies flying about in your belly. This feeling was so disgustingly sweet, but you loved every second of it.

After changing back into your regular clothes, you packed your outfit and got ready to leave after having dinner with Mia.

The club opened at 7pm sharp, and you were there right on time. You went back into the dressing room to change into your carefully selected lingerie and shoes, adding a spray of your favorite perfume as a final touch before getting back out onto the floor to start your night.

“Holy shit Candy.” You heard your manager say as you signed in for the night. “special occasion?”

Tonight, not even his comments could dampen your mood. “You could say that.” You replied cheerfully before sitting down at the bar where you usually waited until Baekhyun arrived.

After sitting for a little while you were called up on stage, so you walked across the room, making sure to sway your hips on the way, and walked up the stairs to the platform with the pole.

You walked slowly around the pole a couple times, getting into the feel of the music. Luckily the dj was on your side tonight, and was playing something slow and sensual enough for you to really get down to. You started to do your usual thing, a couple little spins on the pole, a bend over and shake of the ass here and there, before slowly laying down for some floor work. There were already a decent amount of people in the club, and a few had come up to the stage now to tip you. For maximum tips, you spent a little while in front of each of them either playing with your boobs in front of their face or turning around and shaking your ass as they threw money at you.

The way your club worked was you did one song with your outfit on, and the second song topless. When you heard your fist song coming to an end you stood back up, turning around to face your back to the room as you took it off, to make for a more dramatic reveal. You slowly peeled the thin fabric of the bodysuit off, stepping out of it leaving you in only your thong and shoes.

When you turned back around, Baekhyun’s eyes met yours from across the room. He must’ve walked in as you were facing the wall.

Immediately you grinned, and he looked just as thrilled to see you as well, sitting down at the empty table closest to the stage. He never tipped on stage, you assumed because he was shy about standing up there in front of everyone. Not that you minded, since he always paid you generously anyway. But tonight you didn’t even care about his money.

It seemed he’d put some extra effort into his look for tonight as well. 90% of the time when he would come in he was in sweats, but not today. His black jeans hugged his thighs in a way that made your mouth water, and the fitted white shirt he wore showed off the broadness of his shoulders wonderfully. His black hair was styled out of his face and his glasses were hanging off the neckline of his shirt, further defining the swells of his chest.

Oh how you had missed this. Seeing him here, absolutely enamored with you.

You snapped yourself out of your thoughts and got back to dancing, this time paying special attention to his side of the room. You made sure to send little smirks his way as you did your thing. Once you’d made your way back onto the floor of the stage, you laid on your back on the edge closest to him, arching your back and running your hands up and down your bare body suggestively as you locked eyes.

He looked like he was about to faint.

Eventually the song came to an end. You gathered all the cash that had been thrown at you and got your outfit back on before walking off stage and directly onto Baekhyun’s waiting lap.

“If you’re trying to kill me, it’s working.” You giggled at his words, blushing.

“Thank you, I know this is your favorite outfit on me, right?” You asked, gesturing down to your lacy pink bodysuit.

“Of course.” He was smiling so widely, you thought this might be the happiest you’d ever seen him before.��“You look so good tonight, you always look good of course, but holy shit. You’re really so beautiful.”

Your face turned an even deeper shade of red, the way he was looking at you would’ve made any girl swoon. Oh how beautiful he was as well.

“You’re literally sparkling.” He observed, looking down at the skin of your thigh and all the little silver flecks that were reflecting the spotlights as they moved around the room. “I’m gonna be covered in glitter when I get home aren’t I?”

You laughed, “Yeah, sorry.”

“Oh the things I do for you.”

“I missed this, the two of us hanging out together here, like this.” You whispered in his ear.

You could feel just how warm Baekhyun was. His cheeks were the cutest shade of pink.

He cleared his throat before speaking. “Are you gonna be mad if I take you upstairs before ordering us drinks? I don’t think I can wait tonight.” He swallowed.

“No, I think that’s a great idea.”

“Then I need you to get off my lap babe.” You happily obliged.

As you made your way across the room towards the stairs together, your heart rate began to increase. Never in your life had you been this nervous to give someone a dance. Or maybe nervous wasn’t the right word. Anxious. You were anxious, not nervous. You weren’t scared, you just wanted to do your best to make him enjoy himself.

The both of you knew it wouldn’t be a normal lap dance today. You wouldn’t just dance for a few songs and then sit and talk like usual. There was no way either of you would have the self control to keep it at that.

When you finally got into the room Baekhyun handed you the usual stack of cash, and you started pulling down the straps of your bodysuit when he stopped you.

“I, um, can you keep it on actually? Nothing against your boobs, they’re great, but I just really like this on you.” He said as he sat down and put his glasses on.

You laughed, but put the straps back in place. “Whatever you want.”

Usually, you’d set a timer for an hour. Tonight you didn’t bother.

You got right to it, sitting yourself in between his spread legs and leaning back against his chest. You rolled your body over his to the music, before turning your head to once again whisper in his ear. “I’ve been looking forward to this all day.”

“I’ve been looking forward to this all week.”

You turned your body to face him, both hands running up and down his chest. You could feel how fast his heart was beating beneath your palm.

“Can I touch you?” He asked.

After considering it for a moment, you leaned in towards his ear again.

“You can do whatever you want.” Your bottom lip grazed his earlobe as you said it, and you saw him shiver.

Not a second later you felt his hands start to explore your lace covered torso.

“God, this is a criminal piece of clothing. Why is it so soft.” His hand eventually found it’s way to your neck, where he moved your hair out of the way to admire the marks he’d placed upon it. “So beautiful.” He murmured as he traced his fingers across the trail of bruises he’d left you with.

You stood back up straight in front of him, turned around, and bent over, running your hands across your whole backside and down your thighs. For the first time, his hands made contact with the bare skin of your ass.

“Let me know if I’m making you uncomfortable at all.”

You turned to face him again, planting a knee on either side of his left thigh. “I told you. Whatever. You. Want.” You paused between each word, just to make it a little more dramatic. He swallowed.

It was true. If he decided he wanted to fuck you right then and there, you weren’t going to stop him.

“Really? Anything?”

“Anything.” You repeated.

He was still staring into your eyes, looking slightly concerned, but he found no reason in them to not believe you. You truly wanted him to do whatever he felt like doing with you.

“Come here then.” He grabbed you by the waist firmly and lifted you off his thigh, instead placing you atop his lap completely, one knee now on either side of his body.

You’d never sat with a customer like this. Of course you’d sit on their laps facing away from them all the time, but this felt so much more intimate. You felt the hardness beneath his pants against you, close, too close, to where you wanted him the most. You put your hands back onto his chest and just stared back at him with wide eyes.

“And I can touch you anywhere?”

“Anywhere you want.” You confirmed.

He looked down from your eyes to your chest. One of his hands crept up from your waist, over your ribcage, until he let it rest over the fabric supporting your chest. He ran a thumb over your nipple where it was hiding beneath the lace, causing you to inhale sharply.

Immediately his eyes shot back up to yours, still worried that he was somehow making you uncomfortable, but the look on your face quickly washed his worries away. He felt your heart beating beneath his palm the same way you’d felt his earlier as well.

“Are you s-sure you want me to keep it on?” You asked shakily.

Instead of answering he slipped a finger beneath each of the straps and dragged them down your shoulders until your chest was once again bare. He hadn’t been lying when he said he wanted you to keep it on, but taking it off himself seemed like an even better option now. He bit his lip as he watched the fabric give way, exposing you to him. He stayed silent for a second before finally speaking.

“So, so, perfect.”

You were sure he noticed your whole body flush red at his statement.

His hands were soon back on your ribcage, pulling the bodysuit further down your torso until your entire upper body was naked. Your cheeks were starting to go numb from the excitement and your heart was beating so hard you were sure he could hear it too.

The entire time he undressed you, your eyes were fixed on his pink lips. Oh how they were tempting you. You didn’t remember ever being this turned on in your life. Once he’d had a minute to stare at your chest you quickly took the item off the rest of the way before returning to your previous position straddling his lap.

His hands were warm on your waist as he pulled you closer towards him, until your chests touched. His face was close enough to yours that you could feel his breath on your cheeks. You both just stared for a moment, until something in you snapped and you closed the distance, bringing your lips to his.

You swore there was something about the taste of his lips that was like a drug to you. The second you touched your mouth to his, your whole body felt electrified. Was this that fireworks bullshit people always talked about?

He returned the kiss the passion, but you could tell unlike in his office, he was now taking his time. Your lips moved against each other slowly as you let your fingers run through his hair. It wasn’t rushed, he let his lips move at a relaxed pace as he started to explore your mouth with his own. You felt his tongue ask for entrance and parted your lips, allowing you to taste each other.

You felt one of his hands start to move upwards from your waist, to your ribcage, until it found the soft flesh of your chest, squeezing slightly, causing you to let out a soft moan.

“I’ve fantasized about this so many times.” He broke away from the kiss just enough to get the words out. “You have no idea.”

You shivered at his words, feeling how they made the knot in your stomach tighten in excitement. When he moved his hand to your other breast and flicked a sensitive nipple with his thumb, you moaned out his name shamelessly.

“Fuck, you sound so hot”

His kisses moved from your lips, down your jaw, and to the side of your neck. He placed a gentle kiss beneath your ear giving you chills, before pressing his lips softly to each of the purple marks, making his way all the way down to your collarbone. The whole time his hands continued kneading your chest, making you nearly lose your mind.

You had been touched before, but not like this. You realized that the handful of boys you had allowed to touch you in the past hadn’t known what they were doing at all, Baekhyun did. His expert hands worshipped your bare skin expertly as he continued placing soft kisses down your neck, this time without any sucking or biting that would leave marks. He was enjoying you slowly, softly, but you were impatient and wanted more.

“Baekhyun, please” you whined.

“Please what?”

“Touch me.”

“I am touching you.”

You let out another annoyed whine, wanting, needing, something more to relieve the unbearable tension that was building between your legs. After another few seconds of waiting to see if he’d finally do anything more without any luck, you took matters into your own hands. You started to roll your hips against him, feeling the hardness in his pants through the thin fabric of your thong.

His hands flew down to your hips, gripping them firmly in an attempt to stop your movements, but you continued anyway. After several more rolls of your hips over his hard length, he gave in.

“God, y/n.” He breathed out, voice shaking slightly. “Shit.”

He began to grow needier as well, eventually using his hands on your hips to guide you, rather than stop you, as you continued grinding against him.

Your lips crashed into each other once more, this time with more desperation. He sucked, bit, and licked at your lips, as you did with his. He kept one hand on your hip, sliding down to grope your ass as the other made its way back up towards your chest. The hand on your ass squeezed and pushed you forwards to the beat of the music, pushing you firmly against the tent in his pants.

You still wanted more. You wanted him to touch you everywhere, and you wanted to feel him. In a feeble attempt to try to convince him to give you what you wanted you snaked a hand between your bodies, running it down his chest and then his stomach until you got to the top of his jeans. You let your hand inch down just a little bit further, until you could palm him through his jeans.

This time you let your kisses travel to his neck, before whispering in his ear “Please, I need more.” You could hear the neediness in your voice, but you were way too turned on to feel any shame. “Baekhyun, please.”

He already felt like he was about to burst just with the way you rolled your hips against him. It took every ounce of self restraint in his body not to just yank his pants down, rip off your underwear and shove himself inside you. Feeling your hand over his cock, hearing you literally begging him for more, was too much.

“If you don’t stop I’m gonna come.” He said, sinking his fingers into your thigh hard enough to bruise, bringing your ministrations to a halt.

You leaned back slightly to look at him and saw his eyes closed, brows furrowed with a pained expression on his face. He was really having to hold himself back. You let out a disappointed sound that was somewhere between a whine and a moan.

“That’s okay though.” You honestly wouldn’t have minded, it happened fairly often anyway when you gave lap dances, nothing you weren’t used to. “Please?” You continued to beg, resuming the movement of your hips as well.

A muffled “Oh my god” was all he could get out before his hands were back on you.

He still wouldn’t touch you the way you wanted him to, leaving you more and more wound up and desperate as you whined in his ear with every roll of your hips. His eyes were still closed and his head was tipped back against the couch, giving you access to the smooth skin of his neck. You left kisses all over the soft skin as you kept up the motion of your hips, and you knew he was about to crumble.

You weren’t doing much better yourself. His hands found their way back to your chest, kneading and pinching the sensitive skin perfectly, reducing you to a quivering mess above him. The tension in the pit of your stomach kept building, and you knew you were close as well.

Not a minute later you felt your release crash over your body as you shook against him, letting out a sound of pure euphoria. He seemed to notice, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you in for another searing kiss. You kept moving against him and soon felt him go rigid as well. When he came he held you against his body so tightly, kissed you so hard you forgot your own name for a second. All that mattered in that moment was how good the both of you felt, panting and shaking as you slowly recovered from your highs. As your breathing gradually slowed down, you rested your head on his shoulder, closing your eyes in bliss.

To your disappointment he pushed you back by your shoulder, pulling you out of your dream-like state.

He was shaking his head, “I-I’m sorry I didn’t mean to-”

Instead of listening to him try to apologize for nothing, you shut him up by cupping his face and pulling him into a kiss. “Thank you.”

You smiled at him brightly and he returned it ten fold. You swore that smile was like sunshine even on the darkest day. You let your head rest on his shoulder once again, and he rubbed soothing circles onto the bare skin of your back.

“I was gonna apologize because I really wanted to save this for after I took you on a real date.”

You leaned back up to look at him once again, giggling at his words. “If anything you should be apologizing for not fucking me for real. But does that mean you’re asking me on a date?”

“No! I mean... not yet. I want to do it right. Ask you out properly. But you make it so fucking difficult, you know how hard I have to hold myself back? You’re one hell of a temptation to resist.”

You only rolled your eyes at him, “You’re the one choosing to hold back, if it were up to me you would’ve bent me over your desk Wednesday night already.”

He chuckled, “I know the way we met is... different, but that doesn’t mean you don’t deserve to be swept off your feet. I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself if I treated this like nothing more than some heat of the moment fling. I want more than that, I hope you do too.” He said, looking up at you with hopeful eyes.

“Yeah, I do.” You blushed, looking down to avoid his gaze. Here he was, once again making you flustered with how honest and open he was about his feelings towards you.

The way he smiled back at you, and the admiration you saw in his eyes told you everything you needed to know. You brought your lips to his, and this time, you weren’t fueled by lust. The two of you just enjoyed the feeling of the others lips, basking in the softness and intimacy of it.

Eventually he pulled away, and cleared his throat “I hate to ruin the moment, but I kind of wanna get home and shower. I told you to stop if you didn’t want me to but you kept going so...”

You pouted, but he was right. You’d brought this on yourself. “Okay” you sighed.

After getting off Baekhyun’s lap you got your bodysuit back on, but before you could exit the room together, he grabbed your wrist.

“Come here.” He pulled you towards him, placing his hands around your waist, and you let your arms rest on his shoulders. He looked at you again with those same eyes from earlier, but this time he held your gaze much longer, and with much more intensity. Something felt different this time when he looked at you, like he was trying to tell you something just with his eyes. He brought a hand up to your face, stroking your cheek with his thumb. “You’re so pretty.”

You felt yourself go pink, and smiled as he pulled you in for one last kiss, this one even sweeter than the last.

Eventually both of you went back downstairs, you disappeared into the dressing room to get ready to leave, and Baekhyun went straight to his car.

On your way home you kept thinking about the way he’d looked at you before you both left. It had somehow felt different, more intimate. His gaze had held so much emotion, you wished you could look inside his head at what he’d been thinking. You had been kind of surprised when all he said was that you were pretty, something he’d told you a million times before, so why was it so different this time? Why did it feel like it meant so much more?

The last kiss as well felt too sweet, far too romantic for the time and the place. He was always completely open with his feelings, and of course you knew he liked you, but you couldn’t help but feel like there were some unspoken words in the way he’d looked at you just then.

Maybe, just maybe, it could be love.

Next Chapter

#baekhyun #exo #baekhyun fic #exo fic #baekhyun smut #baekhyun fluff #baekhyun fanfic #exo fanfic #exo smut #exo fluff

261 notes · View notes

honeysidesarchived · 3 years

Text

WHERE THERE IS NO TEMPTATION, THERE IS NO GLORY.

⊱ a santino d'antonio / oc short-fic

euphemia volpe has never wanted for very much; a safe place to sleep, a soft place to land. to love someone, and be loved back. she has all of those things now, but it's most unfortunate for her that she has fallen in love with a man who will never be satisfied with what he's got.

pt. i: contact is crisis

words: 3.3k

warnings: language, some depictions of a relationship that is not entirely healthy, extensive use of my very basic knowledge of italian (padded with google translate, thank you google!), and an unfortunate amount of endearments and pet names. this does not deviate from john wick chapter 2's canon ending, so please bear in mind this will contain major character death.

rating: m for mature language ??? probably closer to t, but will change later on.

notes: as some of you may know, this has been (unfortunately) sitting on my drive since i first watched john wick chapter two almost a year ago--maybe over a year! i can't remember. all i remember was seeing santino and going "SOMEONE has got to kiss that man". so you know, here i am. this short-fic (only a few, short parts) will take place over the span of the events of john wick chapter 2. yes i built some tiny amount of lore for the camorra. yes i had the opportunity to write a fix-it fic and did not. no i am not taking criticism at this time !

special uber big thank you to my beta and my wifey @starcrier who read this a year ago and when i casually said, "hey, so what if i posted this" told me to do it. also @faithchel, who through the occasional sly prompt slid in from ask games (i see you) has been a true angel while i sort through this, and equally as encouraging!

and of course thank you to you all, who read this. i know this is not the usual content you followed me for but i appreciate you all the same. <3

“I cannot believe that I will marry a man so stupid.”

Euphemia is practically frothing at the mouth, she’s so mad; she storms into the chic New York loft, tossing her purse onto the nearby counter, her heels clipping against the polished floor decisively. It’s late; the silk slip of a dress draped across her body brushes the floor in a sweeping train, and she balances herself on the counter with one hand while she steps out of the stilettos with the assistance of the other.

“Euphie, luce della mia vita,” Santino says, striding in after her and completely at ease. He is, infuriatingly, as he always is; perfectly composed, his dark curls in place and his suit immaculate. Euphemia eyes him through the mirror of her vanity as he sidles up behind her. “We’re not married yet, princesa, so you have nothing to worry about.”

“Luce della mia vita,” Euphemia drawls mockingly. She drips the words in honey on the way out of her mouth, sliding a dainty, glittering bracelet from her wrist and dropping it on the counter. “You sound like a fucking idiot, Santi.”

His gaze darkens, but his voice is still silky when he says, “Watch your tone, cara mia.”

“What for?” Euphemia thinks she wouldn’t be able to watch her tone even if she wanted to; not anymore, not with this hanging over her head. She turns to stare at her fiancé, pressing her index finger to his chest. “You’re going to get killed by Baba Yaga anyway. No point in behaving myself, is there? Idiota.”

“Euphemia.”

“You leave John Wick alone, Santino,” she bites out. “You don’t ask for a thing from him. Of him. About him. I don’t want John Wick near my life.”

Santino grabs her wrist, the hand with the engagement ring sitting on it—snatches it out of the air like a cobra striking, grips it with hands that usually are much kinder.

“Everything that you have now is a gift from me,” he warns her, voice pitched low. “You like your nice engagement ring? Your nice dresses? This nice loft we live in?”

His fingers grip, nearly bruising; these are the only times that he doesn’t handle her with care, that his elegant fingers don’t splay against her skin reverently—when she’s pissed him off.

“I’ve given it all to you, all of these things, this life that you like having and don’t want John Wick near, so I would suggest watching your tone for that.”

There is a brief moment where Euphemia thinks she might finally, right now, resort to the violence of slapping Santino in the face. The threat is not lost on her; it’s Santino’s favorite thing to do when he’s angry. And for her to commit an act of violence against her fiancé would be unthinkable almost every other time, in any other situation. Euphie would not have considered it in the least, but there are times—on occasion—where she thinks for a second that she doesn’t recognize him; that he’s become some amalgam of all of the men who have grabbed her too hard or told her she owes them. Men who have used her meanly.

And Santino has divulged his plan to push John Wick for a favor.

So, yes: she thinks she might, but then her hand is moving of her own volition, sliding the engagement ring off of her finger and stuffing it into his jacket pocket, the more pacifist choice than what her mind is screaming for her to do.

“You have never had nothing, Santi,” she says, biting out the words, “so allow me to enlighten you; I have had nothing before you, and I will be just fine having nothing again.”

His eyes narrow, gemlike slits that sit heavy on her. She yanks her wrist of his grip and says, “And it is a good thing we are not married, si? A divorce would have been so messy.”

“Euphie,” Santino says in a sigh that lacks venom, as though he weren’t just threatening to take everything from her, as though she were the hysterical one, “don’t fuss.”

Don’t fuss, he says, because Santino has only ever had women before that bend themselves over backwards until they break for him; don’t fuss, he says, because he likes and maybe loves her, she thinks, but he doesn’t like or love when she talks back. Santino has always had someone to wait on him, to serve him, and Euphemia has never seen his parents together but she would that his only vision of marriage is that of a subservient, dutiful, loving wife.

“Oh, but my darling,” she coos, very undutiful and decidedly not subservient, “I wouldn’t want you to have to worry about all of the nice things you give me. You can enjoy them all yourself, for the brief time before Baba Yaga kills you for asking him to do a job he does not want to do, when he has announced his retirement.”

It’s a terrible way to feed the monster inside of her. That monster is a pusher, a puller, the kind that picked and chipped away at Santino until he lost that shred of his manicured control and gave her something, anything she could work with. It was impossible to love a man who was so buttoned up there was nowhere for her to put her love.

His expression tightens in the way that she recognizes as his controlled fury; bottling it, merchandising it, saving it for later. Santino is not incapable of killing his sister himself, but for some reason—a reason that Euphemia is sure is only known to him—he won’t. Some stupid shit about blood and family, probably.

“Take the ring back.” Santino’s voice is smooth, belying the danger lurking just beneath. He fishes the engagement ring out of the pocket of his suit jacket, where she’d dropped it, and picks up her hand again; this time, his fingers don’t grip with bruising force, but cradle. Euphemia thinks she might have pushed him, then, right to the line, because his eerie calm is unsettling as his fingers meticulously slide the engagement ring back into place.

He says, “There, you see? This is where your engagement ring belongs and will stay. Here, on your hand. Just like this is where you belong and will stay—here, with me.” His hand comes up to her face; she turns away, and he catches her chin and forces her to look back at him.

“You know I will get you anything you want,” Santino murmurs, “but you have to ask.”

Nicely, is the implied word. A good fiancé, a good wife, wouldn’t storm out of the car after he mentions John Wick in passing, ripping through the loft, calling him names. She knows all of this and she thinks, then maybe I’m not a good anything.

But she can tell when she’s pushed Santino’s buttons just enough—enough to make a point, and not enough to incur his wrath. Not entirely.

“Please, Santi,” she says, her voice still hard but softer than it was before, and already Santi is shaking his head so she plunges on recklessly, “do not cash in John Wick’s debt to you. Ascoltami, I know you—I know you will do something to put yourself and John Wick on opposite sides of the playing field.”

Santino’s gaze is sharp and clear. He drops his hand from her face, shrugging, and says, “So what? I will be playing chess, and John Wick will be playing checkers. You worry too much, Euphie.”

“What you mean to say is that I think before I act.”

He shrugs, and threads his fingers through her hair, reaching up with the other to brush loose strands of it from her eyes. He rumbles pleasantly, “Don’t you trust me?”

Euphemia grits her teeth. Her hands come up to grip his wrists, watching him with a prickle of dread in her chest. “Don’t you trust me, Santi?”

Santi’s gaze darkens. Like that, he drops his hands from her, tucking them into the pockets of his slacks as he turns and wanders further into the bedroom, taking all of his warmth with him and leaving Euphie to marinate in the cold glow of the vanity’s lights.

“You can say no,” she says after him, frustrated. “You don’t have to keep an air of mystery about it.”

“What do I do then, tesora?” Santino demands, turning to look at her from the foot of the bed where stands. “Kill her myself? You know I can’t. You know that you cannot ask me to do that.” A pause, and then, with an added air of entitlement: “And Wick owes me.”

There are complicated feelings wrapped up in the whole of it, she knows; Santino, who wants what his sister was given, but cannot bring himself to end her. Euphemia, who only wants Santino, who doesn’t care if he has a seat at the High Table or if he’s a sister-killer or not, who only wants him to look at her longingly like he did when they first met, just for forever instead of a brief moment in time.

And both of them, intrinsically linked, because Santino isn’t wrong when he says that he’s given her everything she has now and Euphemia isn’t wrong when she says she would be okay with nothing again.

She doesn’t ask it of him; he is right, that she can’t, that she wouldn’t. Gianna has only ever been kind to her, at least face to face, and if Santi’s sister had any reservations about Euphemia, then Euphie would find herself in a completely different situation. Not engaged to the only other heir to the D’Antonio empire, that was for certain.

Instead, then, she says, “I cannot ask you to do it, you’re right. I cannot ask you to do it, and I cannot keep you, and I cannot throw you away, Santino. I was less tired when I had nothing.”

She turns away and walks herself into the bathroom, fingers trembling as she undoes the delicate zipper of the gold dress, letting it pool at the floor in a whisper of fabric. The engagement ring sits heavy on her hand. It’s beautiful—and just what she wants, and also the thing that she fears the most, because she doesn’t know what it means to Santino and only what it means to her.

“Euphie.”

His voice comes from the doorway of the bathroom. She turns on the hot water in the tub, a beautiful porcelain clawfoot that she picked herself. It was one of the first things that Santino gifted to her, the first essence of her in the loft that is now almost entirely half-and-half the two of their tastes.

Euphemia doesn’t say anything, because she doesn’t know what to say, so she ties up her hair and shimmies out of the last of her clothes. She can feel his eyes on her, waiting for her to flower into submission and turn around and beg, oh, please Santino, forgive me, but he should know better because she has never and will never do that for him.

“Cara mia.”

“Do not.” Euphemia’s voice wobbles. She slides into the bathtub before it’s full, the water stinging her skin where it touches. “I can’t stand to hear your voice saying sweet things to me when you are willingly walking yourself into your grave.”

“You are being a little dramatic.” He makes his way over to her, kneeling down beside the porcelain tub, ghosting his fingers over her forehead and then the bridge of her nose, fluttering in a way that treasures her and causes her grief all at once. “Just one job, Euphie. That’s all I’m going to ask of him. And then it’s done, and you won’t have to be worried about the Boogeyman.” The pads of his fingers dip into the hot water and then skim along the slope of her collarbone, raising goosebumps on her skin. “And John Wick, whose lifelong peace you are very concerned about, can go back to his dog and his car.”

Euphemia thinks, it’s never just that, with you, because she knows Santino—she knows he’s hungry, has always been hungry, a boy magicked into a man’s skin all hurt and needing and starved, unable to inhibit himself properly. No self-preservation telling him when to stop, never telling him when enough is enough. Not really.

I see you, though, she thought, her gaze flickering over Santino’s face to trace the handsome lines of his expression. She would have never agreed to marry a man before she saw him without his face off; without knowing the monster underneath.

But while she knows this, and she sees Santino D’Antonio for what he really is, she is an idiot and a fool and loves a man sick with the magic of his own perceived destiny, a destiny he believes he is owed, so she says softly, “Promise me, Santi.”

“On my life,” Santino replies with that boyish charm she knows so well. He speaks as though he is not going to leave her in the morning to visit Baba Yaga, as though she doesn’t fear he won’t ever come back. “Now give me a kiss, princesa.”

“I mean it, Santino—”

“I do, too.” He cocks his head to the side. “I won’t ask twice.”

Euphemia acquiesces; not because she fears what he’ll do if he does feel he has to ask twice—because he does hate that—but because as much as she says she would be happy to have nothing again, she is content to bask in the something that she has now, while she has it.

She kisses the corner of his mouth. He slides his damp fingers into the hair at the nape of her neck and says, “Do you love me?”

“Of course.” Her voice feels rough with an emotion she doesn’t want any of. “Of course, Santi, that’s why I—”

“All I need is a yes or no, my little fox, not an essay.”

Her eyes narrow. She turns her face from him; he shifts his position at the end she’s leaned against, dragging his hands along her shoulders to ease the tension in her muscles. Her body reacts instinctively to him. She is a long cry from the girl scamming rich men out of their wallets and time, but there are some things she is still weak to; touch, the acknowledgment that she has a body, that she is real, to be reassured that she is alive.

Santino is so very good at that. He leans over the end of the tub and kisses her cheek, fingers working into the knots of her shoulders.

I am so afraid, she thinks, her eyelashes fluttering shut. I am so afraid that I will never see old age on you.

“Tesora.” His voice is a lull. Pulling her back in, pushing her back under, reminding her that to relinquish herself to someone is a luxury she does not want to go without anymore. To let someone else take control, to not have to worry about making decisions all the time; this is something that she always wants.

“Yes,” Euphie says, “of course I love you, Santi.”

She can feel his smile against her cheek.

“Good girl.”

━━━━━━━━━━━━

“Tell me your favorite words.”

It’s both early and late; the clock’s cool blue numbers are keeping her awake; Santi’s hand slides along the curve of her hip admiringly above the silk of her nightdress, and his nose brushes the bump at the base of her neck. Euphemia shifts. When she does, the edge of her engagement ring catches on the silky pillowcase, but she doesn’t care—it will always do that, because Santi won’t pick another and Euphie won’t ask him to.

Goosebumps prickle along her skin with the air conditioning, cranked as high as she likes, whispers across it when her shoulder slides out from underneath the comforter. She rolls over to look at him. It’s unsurprising that he’s still awake, and he doesn’t look surprised to see she’s awake, either.

“My favorite words?” she prompts. Santino brings his hand to her face, his thumb dragging absently along her lower lip.

“Si,” he replies. “You are always reading. You can speak a few languages. You must have favorite words, no?”

His request does bring a smile to her face, tired as it is. They may have spent the rest of their waking evening wandering around each other like wounded dogs, wary and licking their wounds, but they are here now, together, in their bed.

Euphie says, “It is late, Santi.”

“And I cannot sleep.” He brushes his nose along her jawline. “But perhaps the soothing voice of my one greatest love will lull me.”

She laughs. Her hand finds his, their fingers interlacing, woven together. He pulls back from her and kisses the engagement ring, but he is waiting. He means it.

“Tendresse,” Euphemia says, the word rolling soft out of her mouth from misuse. Santino quirks a brow expectantly and kisses the pulse point of her wrist. “Tenderness.”

He nods sagely. Against the soft skin of the inside of her wrist, he murmurs, “You are a most tender creature, Euphemia D’Antonio.”

Her fingers slide out of his, running along the slope of his cheekbones and then the bridge of his nose. “That is Euphemia Volpe. If you’ll recall, we’re yet to be married.”

Santino leans in, captures her fingertips playfully with his teeth, and then kisses her palm with a warm, rich chuckle that sends pleasant heat spiraling down her spine. “You will never forget that I was fool enough to say that to you, will you?” he asks. “Tell me another.”

His eyes are just as warm as his voice, and twice as earnest. In these moments, Santino is the most charming; boyish and quick-witted, unburdened by the elements of the world, by his own desires. He thinks of nothing except them. Euphemia feels like she’s in her own little world with him, in their bedroom at three in the morning, while the air conditioner whirrs and ticks and he asks her something so unimportant, like what her favorite words are.

And then, Santino leans in and kisses her cheek, the corner of her mouth, and the underside of her jaw to prompt her.

“Amore,” she murmurs, feeling like the breath has been sucked out of her lungs by his longing. His tenderness.

“Oh,” Santino says, against her temple, “I know that one.”

When his stubble tickles her neck, she squirms, shifting away from him so hat she can take a breath; but he chases her, leans in and captures her in his arms so that he can nose the hair by her ear and kiss there.

“Euphie, my gorgeous girl,” he says in the way that wrenches her heart; drenched and drowned in adoration. “Perfetto e tutto mio.”

Santino wraps his arms around her and pulls her to his chest, his fingers tracing constellations on her back where the night dress slips away from her shoulder blades. Sweet Santi, covetous Santi; she is his greatest art piece, his favorite collector’s item, and in these moments she has never felt more treasured. There is something equal parts safe and selfish in wanting someone to treasure you.

“Say it for me, Euphie. You know I love when you do.”

She buries her face into his neck. Her eyes burn. He will go to Baba Yaga tomorrow, and she will have to pretend not to know, or it will wreck her. Euphie considers ways to keep him in bed in the morning; delay him, make him forget about John Wick and this glory that he is chasing forever.

“Sono tuo,” she murmurs. Tears sting at the corners of her eyes If he feels them against his skin, Santino makes no indication than to card his fingers through her hair. “Always, Santi.”

Always, always, always yours.

#john wick fic #santino d'antonio x oc #santino d'antonio / oc #spilled ink #c: euphemia volpe #c: santino d'antonio #i have nothing to say for myself except thanks and ily all <3 #scheduled post #x: senza tentazioni senza onore

49 notes · View notes

missjanjie · 3 years

Text

Somewhere in the Crowd There's You | Rosnali

Summary: Denali and Rosé were best friends all through middle and high school, but had to part ways after graduating in 1998. But even years later, the one thing that always connected them were the mixtapes Rosé would make. Ship: Rosnali Word Count: 2174 Rating: T

ao3 | ko-fi

Bonus: Denali's Playlist for Rosé

“Denali, so help me god if you’re late to graduation you will not make it to college!” her mother shouted up the stairs.

Denali groaned and rolled her eyes. “I’m coming!” she yelled back down to her. She pressed ‘stop’ on her CD player and popped the cover open, taking the disk out and putting it into its correct sleeve in her CD book. It was a smaller one, as it only contained her most precious ones - the mixtapes Rosé had given her over the years.

The two of them had been best friends since they had both transferred to the same Manhattan school in sixth grade, Denali coming from Alaska and Rosé from Scotland. Both of them had felt out of place and immediately sought refuge in each other and had been inseparable ever since. And one thing that had always been consistent in their friendship was Rosé’s love of burning CDs and giving them to her, whether it was for a special occasion or just because she thought Denali would like it, and she always did.

“And don’t even think about trying to take your walkman!”

She huffed, looking at it waiting for her on her bed. “Fine,” she threw her gown over her dress and grabbed her cap before hustling out the door.

Any attitude she might have had disappeared the second she got out of the car and saw Rosé. she sprinted towards the taller girl, launching herself into her arms. “Rosie!”

Rosé scooped Denali up without hesitation, one arm wrapped around her waist and the opposite hand holding her thigh. “Hi Dee,” she cooed, spinning around with her before eventually setting her back down. “I got something for you.”

Denali giggled as Rosé reached up under her gown because of course, she would manage to get away with wearing pants at graduation. She beamed from ear to ear as Rosé placed a CD in her hand. Written in pink glitter gel pen over masking tape was ‘Denali + Rosé: Class of ‘98’, with a heart over the ‘i’. She looked at the tracklist and smiled when she saw one was highlighted - that meant Rosé had recorded herself singing, and that was her favorite part. “Super Trouper?” she tilted her head, noting it was the only song on the list that hadn’t come out during their time in high school.

She shrugged, a tinge of pink ghosting her cheeks. “I like ABBA and the song made me think of you.”

“I love it,” she quickly assured, hugging her tightly before sliding the mixtape into her macrame crossbody bag. “Come on, we better go take our seats so we can say goodbye to our childhood.”

Rosé arched her brow. “Bit grim when you put it that way, but let’s go.”

After graduation Rosé and Denali went to dinner together with their families, then back to Denali’s house for a sleepover, likely one of the last ones they would have before college. But they didn’t want to think about that, instead focusing on enjoying the time they had together.

It wasn’t easy for either of them, and Denali was left with a difficult decision. When she was twelve, she acknowledged the fact that she was attracted to girls, but decided it was best to not do anything about it. At sixteen, she realized that it wasn’t just girls in general, that would be too easy to ignore. For the past two years, she had accepted the fact that she was in love with Rosé, but too paralyzed with fear to do anything about it.

So, she made a mixtape. Each song one declaration of love after another. And it had been sitting in her closet for a week now while she tried to talk herself into giving it to her best friend. She knew it was now or never, tonight had to be the night.

“Something on your mind?” Rosé gently prompted.

Denali hesitated, then shook her head. “I’m just gonna miss you,” she told her, sitting next to her cross-legged on the bed. “We’re gonna stay in touch, right?”

“Of course,” Rosé assured. “We can call each other and talk on AIM when we can get to the campus libraries,” she suggested, resting her hand on Denali’s thigh and squeezing gently. “I think we can make it work.”

She chewed on her lip and nodded. “If you think so, then I do too.” She glanced back at her closet, thinking, her heart racing. Rosé cared enough about her to want to make their friendship work. Maybe there was a chance…

“Hey,” Rosé prompted to change the subject, “I rented Cinderella with Brandi from Blockbuster, you wanna watch?”

Denali nodded, letting her fear quell her desire to give her the disk. “Yeah, I’ll go make some popcorn.”

Six Years Later

Manhattan felt almost as foreign to Denali as it did when she first moved there. Despite the nostalgia that filled her when she walked past Broadway, recalling seeing RENT there with Rosé for her eighteenth birthday, or the other little things that brought her back to her teenage years, she felt odd, out of place. It made her stomach churn with the way everything seemed to change.

It didn’t help that, despite all of the promises they had made to each other, she had lost touch with Rosé sometime after the start of her sophomore year. Their lives had gotten so busy, so involved, it just dissipated and she had to try her best to move on.

And most days Denali was able to go about her life as normal. She returned to her apartment with lunch for herself and her roommate. Her new normal. “Liv! Come eat!”

Olivia promptly emerged from her room, a piece of paper in her hand. “Check out this flyer I snagged from the café a few blocks over. They’re having a karaoke night tonight, we should go,” at Denali’s hesitation, she jutted out her bottom lip and batted her lashes. “C’mon, please? They’re gonna have alcohol.”

With a jokingly dramatic sigh, she acquiesced. “Okay, fine, but don’t even think about trying to drag me on stage before I’ve had at least three drinks.”

After lunch, the two of them got ready for the night, doing their hair and makeup and picking out just the right outfits for the modern y2k-era nightlife. The walk to the café was about ten minutes and they were able to get a table before the room started to fill up. Her attention faded in and out as people started to perform, nursing her drink and picking at the chips on the table.

“Alright, who’s next?” the event host prompted, scanning the room. “You, in the pink, right this way!” There were some scattered cheers as a woman took the stage, but Denali didn’t look up until she started singing.

Olivia noticed the sudden alertness in her friend. “What, you’re an ABBA fan?”

“No, no I know that voice,” she insisted, shushing her to focus on the stage better. There was no way, it couldn’t be…

“But I won’t feel blue like I always do. ‘Cause somewhere in the crowd there’s-” Rosé looked into the audience, her eyes meeting Denali’s and her breath hitching in her throat, nearly missing the last word, but when she got it out, it was as if she were singing to her once again, “...you.”

Before Denali could decide what to do, Rosé was making a beeline for her, then she was standing right in front of her, looking more beautiful than Denali could’ve ever anticipated. “Rosie?” she asked softly, afraid it was too good to be true.

A broad smile stretched across Rosé’s face as if she were wondering the same thing until that moment. “Denali!” She yanked the smaller woman to her feet and pulled her into a tight embrace, one that neither of them ever wanted to end. “When did you move back to New York?”

“Couple weeks ago officially. My parents moved out to Long Island, so I was staying with them while I was trying to find a place. That’s how I met Olivia, my roommate,” Denali explained, gesturing to the girl still sitting at the table.

Olivia offered a polite wave and smile in response. “It seems like you guys have some catching up to do, I’m gonna go on stage next then, um, keep myself busy,” she decided and scurried off.

“Let’s go outside,” Rosé suggested, the two of them leaving the café and sitting on a bench in front of it. “I’ve missed you so much. What have you been up to?”

Denali shrugged. “Got my BFA in dance, worked with a few different companies either performing or choreographic. And last year I was in Zumanity, which was quite the experience,” she blushed a bit as she recalled that, unsure if Rosé was familiar with the type of show it was, “and now I’m here as a full-time dance teacher and choreographer. What about you?”

Rosé’s eyes did widen at the name, feeling her face start to redden as her mind started to wander, wondering what sort of things Denali had performed on stage. While she hadn’t seen the show, she had seen commercials when watching TV late at night. She’d nearly missed her question, clearing her throat and centering herself. “Oh, well, my life hasn’t been as interesting as yours, I got my BFA in musical theatre, did various off-Broadway gigs, and… you’re going to laugh… I’m the understudy for the lead role in Mamma Mia here on Broadway.”

“Mamma Mia… the ABBA jukebox musical?” She covered her mouth as she tried not to laugh, a bit of giggling slipping through. “A little on the nose, isn’t it Rosie? But I’m very happy for you.”

“Maybe so, but I’m much more interested in this Zumanity stint. I mean, I always knew you had that skill level but that’s a… unique setting,” Rosé retorted, her interest, and perhaps something more, very piqued.

Denali looked down and grinned. “It was. Everyone there was incredibly talented too, it was so freeing, so queer,” she said, then hesitantly looked back up to reaffirm, “which I also am, you know, gay.”

Rosé chuckled softly and nodded. “I kind of suspected as much, just with the way you reacted when we saw RENT,” she recalled, then quickly followed up with, “I am too.”

An eight-year-long weight lifted from Denali’s chest at the confession. “Do you wanna come back to my place? It’s just a couple of blocks over, we can have a sleepover like we used to,” she suggested.

“I’d love that,” she grinned, and as they walked back to the apartment, she had her arm slung around Denali’s shoulders, not passing up the first opportunity in years to keep her close. Even though it was an apartment she’d never been in before, the fact that it was Denali’s made it feel familiar.

Denali toed out of her shoes and set her purse down. “I have something for you,” she said suddenly, disappearing into her bedroom before Rosé to question her. She rifled through her closet, pulling out a box tucked away and grinning when she found the items she was looking for. It was still a risk, but this time she knew it was one worth taking. She took a deep breath, then rejoined Rosé in the living room. “I kept every mixtape you gave me, still listen to them sometimes,” she said, holding up the CD book in one hand.

“You did?” Rosé put her hand over her chest, beaming warmly. “Dee, that’s so sweet.”

She smiled, biting her lip and looking down, trying to fight away the nerves that crept back up. “I, um, I made you one too. I was going to give it to you after graduation but I chickened out,” she confessed as she handed the mixtape she had hidden among her possessions all these years to the woman she made it for. “I think the tracklist will explain why.”

Rosé’s lips parted in surprise as she gently took it from her. “To Rosie, with love,” she read the title before turning it over to see where Denali had written the songs in silver sharpie. And, sure enough, it was one love song after another, songs she knew well, that she knew the shorter woman spent her time carefully picking out each one. “Oh, Dee, this is beautiful. Honestly, I don’t know what I would’ve done if you gave it to me back then.”

Denali swallowed thickly. “I guess more importantly, what are you gonna do now?”

There was only a half-beat of silence before Rosé smirked, setting the disk on the dining room table before cupping Denali’s face and kissing her deeply, moving one hand from her face to wrap her arm around her body and pull her close. “I’ve always loved you, Denali. I’d just resigned myself to seeing you as the one that got away.”

Denali relaxed, arms looping around Rosé’s neck. “I’m not going anywhere.”

#rosnali #rosenali #rpdr rpf

25 notes · View notes

qqueenofhades · 3 years

Note

pel!ivan and fedyor went through a lot of ups and some downs from the end of pel and 2021 but they also celebrated 10 years together 🥳 i hope fedyor shoved cake into ivan’s face and also you know, im sure they were mushy like the saps they are

Ivan was supposed to be out of here ten minutes ago – actually, at this point, more like twenty – but the clients are still fucking talking, and if they keep it up much longer, he’s going to add it to the bill for “initial consultation.” Drew has a man-bun and unbearably hip black glasses, and works as a developer for some start-up app that he’s tried to convince Ivan to download at least twelve times. (What does the app actually do? Don’t know don’t care.) Mia is thin, blonde, waifish, smells like essential oils, and has been flitting around with her smartphone the entire time, getting in Ivan’s way as she snaps perfectly filtered pictures of the “developmental process” and posts them nonstop on Instagram. They both have a lot of opinions on how they want the energy of the space to feel, and a preapproved list of ethically sourced suppliers. They have paid some ludicrous price for this converted loft in Prospect Heights and chose the location for its proximity to the best farmer’s markets and hippie coffeehouses. Did Ivan die? Is this hell?

Somewhat ostentatiously, he looks at his watch. “Okay,” he announces. “I think that wraps up. You have work number, so – ”

“Oh, just one more thing!” Drew has recently read one (1) book on home design and thinks he’s an expert, so Ivan is forced to suffer his idiotic opinions about the kind of tile they want to use on the kitchen backsplash. Somehow, he manages not to roll his eyes directly out of his head, for which he should be commended. Ivan has discovered that the secret of successfully dealing with people, especially clients, is to smile and nod at everything they say, while mercilessly mocking them in your head. Amazing, the things you learn as a small-business owner in Brooklyn in the year of our lord 2021. Especially when it comes to renovating overpriced tiny gentrified apartments for insufferable techno-douchebags and their vapid influencer girlfriends. And people think Ivan might want to live like this more often? No fucking thank you.

Finally (it’s another ten minutes after that, this is definitely going on the bill), they more or less wrap up, except for the fact that Mia then wants a picture with the three of them. “It’s just so important to us that we’re supporting the immigrant community,” she explains earnestly. “After all, being open, tolerant, learning from our neighbors, people who are different from us, that’s what life is all about. We just love that you’re foreign. The energy feels so right, you know?”

Ivan wonders whether to inform her that he has lived in this country for eight years and been a full citizen (passport and voting rights and everything) for three, then decides that this would venture into sharing-personal-information territory and he is having none of it. His English has improved to the point where he can handle almost all business transactions by himself, but feigning incomprehension can sometimes get him out of them when they turn really stupid. Unfortunately, that isn’t an option here, and so he diligently leans into the frame, smiling half an inch, while Mia snaps a picture of “us and our adorable Russian contractor!!” Ivan informs her of the correct flag emoji to add to the filter, decides that he’s going to add an extra fifty bucks just for that, and finally, finally, makes his escape.

It’s rush hour, and the Q is crammed as Ivan heads into midtown. So much for social distancing and not getting too close to anyone, which is the only thing from the pandemic that he wouldn’t mind keeping. Only about half the crowd is wearing masks, including him, and so he gets off at Times Square, dodges the latest lunatic standing on a soapbox and shouting about how it is all a hoax, and walks several blocks uptown, just to get some space. He finally reaches the restaurant, where he has to flash his vaccination card to get inside (Ivan, who remains Russian to the marrow of his bones, is a little irked that he couldn’t get Sputnik here and had to settle for Pfizer) and climbs up to the open-air rooftop terrace. It is only when he spots his husband, waiting at a table that overlooks the glittering evening lights of the city, when Ivan pulls off his mask and allows himself to properly smile. “Sorry I’m late,” he says. “They are the worst.”

“I figured it was something like that.” Fedyor musters a smile in return, though his eyes look permanently tired these days and Ivan would bet that he’s been scrolling through more depressing emails on his phone. Technically Fedyor is on a two-month sabbatical from work, but he can’t stop himself, and Ivan has had to pry it from his fingers on a number of occasions. “But you’re here now. That’s what matters.”

Ivan nods stoutly, they are furnished with the drinks and appetizers list, and when the waiter asks if there’s any special occasion tonight, tell him that they are celebrating their ten-year anniversary, albeit somewhat late. This was supposed to happen last spring, but obviously, nobody in New York was going out to a restaurant in the early months of 2020, and Ivan himself had barely gotten home from the hospital and still could be knocked over in a strong breeze. They’re celebrating a lot of things tonight, in other words, even if it’s now been eleven years, not ten, since the day Ivan marched into a Red Square coffee shop and engaged in – well, Fedyor has made sure to inform him that the first date didn’t go nearly as well as Ivan always thought it did. But it worked, didn’t it? Here they are, wedding bands on their fingers, a couple of successful American urban professionals who have built a nice life for themselves and are, if anything, even more madly in love than they were when this whole nutty adventure together first began. So really, if you ask Ivan Sakharov Kaminsky, it went just fine after all.

The waiter congratulates them, gives them two drinks for the price of one, and they both relax and start to talk, fully at ease in the way they only are in each other’s company. Ivan does his Mia impression in an extremely convincing falsetto (after all, [NAME REDACTED] has practice at this) and Fedyor almost dies laughing. They hold hands on the table – no need to hold them under the table – and gaze into each other’s eyes all they want, order dinner and dessert, and take a long time about it. They raise several toasts to this, to them, to ten years, may there be many more. Ivan pays the bill, his treat, and they walk slowly back to Times Square, hand-in-hand, Fedyor’s head nestled on Ivan’s shoulder. It’s New York. Nobody cares.

They ride the Q home, in all its smelly, secondhand glory, taking an hour to bang out to Brighton Beach and descending the elevated stairs into the familiar down-at-heel comfort of their Russian-American neighborhood, neon Cyrillic signs glowing in windows and somebody shouting about how if Sergei ever shows his face here again, she is going to cut his dick off. Ivan and Fedyor look at each other and snort, resisting the urge to shout up and ask what exactly Sergei did, and walk a few more minutes to their building. They climb up three flights of stairs to their apartment, unlock the door and the deadbolt, and step inside.

The instant they are home, Rasputin shoots out of nowhere, yowling as if he has been neglected for months, and curls himself around Ivan’s ankles (he is still liable to give Fedyor evil looks when he feels that this interloper has been stealing his human too often). Ivan sighs, trudges to the kitchen, points out to Rasputin that his food bowl is still half full, gets a wounded look in return, and adds an extra scoopful. Once the cat is happily snarfing down, Fedyor pulls Ivan by the hand, into the dim living room with its blowing curtains. “Come here, my love,” he says. “Hold me.”

Ivan does as ordered, because it’s his favorite thing in the world: cuddling Fedyor close, nothing but the two of them in all of time and space, swaying slowly in the blue hour with fingers and arms and hearts entwined. Ivan kisses Fedyor’s temple, and Fedyor nestles even closer, melted into his embrace. “I love you, Vanya,” he mumbles against Ivan’s collarbone. “I love you so much. I love you more than anything in the world. I love you, I love you, I love you.”

“I love you too, Fedya.” Ivan leans down and kisses him properly, sweet and slow and lingering, as they continue to waltz in stately time to a music that nobody except the two of them can hear. “I’m still not always sure why you married me, but I am very glad you did.”

#heartrender husbands #fivan #fivan ff #ivan x fedyor #a phantom in enchanting light #pel asks #anonymous #ask #(in repayment for the pain i have inflicted on you with the lighthouse au)#(ahem)

31 notes · View notes

mymelancholiesblues · 3 years

Text

No, Mia isn’t "low-tier" compared to Ada (morally speaking, or w/e) – a measured answer?/essay

So, a couple of Ada haters tried to put up a false symmetry between both of these characters there on twitter, and it inspired me to put my own thoughts down in a more articulate essay as to why that's (Ada's somehow being morally worse than Mia) not sustained by canon in Resident Evil.

standing there, killing time

can't commit to anything but a crime

all the good girls go to hell

'cause even God herself has enemies

and once the water starts to rise

and heaven's out of sight

she'll want the Devil on her team. ⁕

First things first: let us debunk the false symmetry that they tried to establish between these two characters with extremely distinct archetypes – and worse, the following replies to this false symmetry and its poor arguments trying to validate it, pointing out that, in fact, no, character B (that would be Ada, btw) – which is so evidently and ridiculously different from character A (and that would be Mia) – is, in fact, WAY WORSE than character A, and then proceeding to assert some unsupported propositions about misogyny in Resident Evil (which, tbh, definitely IS a recurring problem in the franchise, but that in this case particularly, little or does not apply AT ALL) and how Ada contributes to "the perpetration of a biological cold war".

Starting with what differentiates Mia from Ada grotesquely: we know NOTHING of Ada's true alliances in RE's world. Mia, however, canonically worked for a group that participated in the importation and exportation as well as the manufacturing, testing and marketing of biological weapons: "The Connections", a CRIMINAL SYNDICATE which, amongst other things, was also involved in money laundering, assassinations as well as weapons and drug trafficking. I don't care at all about Mia, so I don't intend to waste much of my time going on about her role in the plot, but people should've already realized by just that much how infinitely dishonest is to try to put these two characters as "similar" ones, or argue that Ada is somehow worse.

Another detail that shouldn't escape anyone's attention too, are the origins and nationalities of both – and yes, I intend to briefly bring up racism against eastern-Asian looking characters (a silent plague that takes form by each passing day in all fiction fandoms) and anti-China xenophobia, but for now, hold this tea there just before I drop it: Mia is canonically American, and previously a Texas-state resident; meanwhile, we have no confirmation of Ada's nationality except for her pretty evident Chinese ancestry. But, as I said, hold it there for a while.

i) espionage — the job

red so silent

wait a minute

or just a little while.

what are you looking for? ⁕

At all times that Ada's "job" was brought up in this franchise, in ALL of her cameos, she has NEVER been called a mercenary in the original Japanese. She's always referred to as a SPY. Even in RE2R, the most recent title in which she's featured in, the original text of the game makes a point of labelling her as a SPY (and not a mercenary) in the dialogue that transpires between Annette and Leon.

It's the North-American translation and correspondent localization that now and then falls for the equivocal use of this other term. This distinction is important since espionage NECESSARILY implies operating in an organized service for, perhaps a country, or a political cause, or a class/group, or a corporation, or whatever. While a mercenary is someone who's acting per their self financial interests, indiscriminately selling their specialized "labour" and skills to anyone who'll offer more.

Ada's not a mercenary, she's a spy. But Mia, in addition to being hired to a canonically criminal company, was also the handler personally assigned to Eveline. I don't care how exactly Mia got in that predicament but the fact is: Mia was canonically employed by a company that profited over illicit activities and directly watched as a family was destroyed and toyed with by this new killing machine (Eve). Yet, we can't state for sure that we know to whom or to what Ada is truly affiliated with.

ii) sources — check them

who's a heretic now?

am I making sense?

how can you make it stick?

and I'm on a trial

waiting 'til the beat comes out. ⁕

This fandom should put a little more thought into which translation and localization of the game texts, dialogues and files they are using to support their arguments. I know that in some cases the United States people have a bit of an inclination to think of themselves as the owners of the planet and deem English as the only language that matters in this world, but let's not forget that RE is a Japanese franchise (wow, insane, right?!). Therefore, the most valid script, with the greatest amount of details, and highest credibility, is the Japanese original. Throughout these years, there have been several errors in translation and localization of the Japanese original to North-American English. And, believe me, curiously enough, plenty of those concern Ada, since she's often mentioned or referred to in a very vague way – without the use of pronouns or adjectives or adverbs that could help in indicating gender. This ended up causing those details and mentions to her to get overlooked, even though in the Japanese text it was a clear reference to her character (per observation of context).

iii) the good guys — one of

head in the dust

feet in the fire

labour on that midnight wire

listening for that angel choir

you got nowhere to run

careful son, you got dreamers plans

but it gets hard to stand. ⁕

Yes, as much as haters try to minimize it, it is SIGNIFICANT that Ada saved so many important characters and stood for unquestionably heroic actions in so many moments - like stopping everything she was doing so she could help completely random Chinese civilians with the helicopter she managed to pilot in that chaos in China (yeah, I know you haters love to forget about this, but it happened, it's there in canon, and no, it wasn't her direct OR indirect responsibility what was going on in China: REPLAY RE6 and for the love of GOD, never again argue that what she did was somehow "the equivalent of evacuating a city after selling a WMD to destroy that same city". It's a case of pure intellectual dishonesty to say such a thing. It's canon that Carla was the one who caused what happens in China, PLEASE, PLAY RE6).

Furthermore, Ada shows compassion on some occasions even for characters who are directly putting her in harms ways, like Annette (in RE2 OG, right after - in order to defend herself - she slaps Annette leading her to lose balance and collapse over the sewers fences, Ada makes an effort in trying to pull Annette back and prevent her from falling) and Carla.

Replay RE4 and pay attention to it, pay attention to her solo campaign: getting involved with Leon's journey in Spain hasn't brought any real benefit to her mission or herself: Ada deviates from her main path several times due to worrying about him and trying to help him and almost ends up dead in several of these occasions over her insistence in doing so: by saving him from Bitores Mendez, by helping him and Ashley against Sadler, by confronting Krauser and stopping him.

It's so lazy to only read/listen to a file in which she says in English that "Leon might be useful to her plans" (this is way more nuanced in the Japanese original of Ada's Report), and ignore everything that was SHOWN in the game: every effort she made to ensure that Leon could rescue Ashley, remove the parasite from his and her bodies, and escape from that hell-island.

The jet-ski she left for their escape was ALREADY there before she was captured by Sadler (or you think she arranged it while she was caught?). Leon having to intervene and save her from Sadler WASN'T her plan. It WASN'T her plan to take the sample from Leon's hands. She wanted to help him get out of there with Ashley and she guaranteed he could do so, she wanted to get the sample by herself and escape too while sending that hell to kingdom's come. But, because she chose to help Leon rescue Ashley right in front of Sadler, she ends up captured.

On her end, Mia never did anything minimally compared to that, and all of her "selflessness" or self-sacrificing actions involved a much, MUCH smaller scope than Ada's: wanting to help her husband and HERSELF is not at all comparable to saving a few dozens of unknown Chinese civilians. So no, they aren't "cut from the same cloth". They don't come from the same place, nor do they share the same intentions or goals, and their contributions to the RE storyline are quite different.

iv) unknown true purpose (shades of grey)

lining up in the background

waiting for the crowd shot to be seen

in the shadow of the big screen

everybody begs to be redeemed. ⁕

In databooks, Ada is recurrently described as "a Chinese spy with extraordinary physical abilities, vigorous health and composed mind and spirit, capable of coping with grim situations and handling even the most difficult requests without losing composure". If we are paying attention to the storytelling ingame, however, we know that this isn't always the case: Ada did let her mask of unswerving emotional and physical strength fall and showed a very fragile side under strenuous circumstances a couple of times already.

Also, in these databooks, they often point out that "she has her own 'true purpose' and has FREQUENTLY betrayed organizations and clients to achieve it". Huh, we can AGAIN, by this only, see how completely different she's from Mia, who personally watched an entire family being driven to insanity by Eveline's hand.

Furthermore, in these databooks, it's often said that "this true purpose is still obscure and whether she truly cared for anyone or simply used her charms to manipulate people that crossed paths with her isn't ever clear". If people are willing to be open-minded and exercise their text comprehension skills, though, they'll see that in multiple occasions of emotional confrontation it has been established time and time again that yes, Ada DOES care. She wasn't capable of shooting Leon and there has been a couple of other times that failing to choose a cool, sociopathic calculation and pragmatical demeanour over empathy and humanity towards others has put her in harms ways: nonetheless she still chose it.

v) positive impact

I'm gonna break the cycle

I'm gonna shake up the system

I'm gonna destroy my ego. ⁕

To this point, RE's plot systematically leads us to believe that Ada has been covertly acting behind the scenes of multiple biological incidents COLLECTING INFORMATION (the job of a spy, who would've thought! lmao), that is valuable to numerous organizations, companies, groups and different contexts, but at the same time of allegedly offering to handle this knowledge for the right price to the big players involved with bioterrorism and clandestine trading of bioweapons, she's also working to sabotage said players.

This is evident throughout the franchise: she intended to hurt Umbrella's business. She outwitted and deceived Wesker multiple times. She even undermined Simmons, someone who was in a position of power in the US government and actively using that position to lead bioterrorist ventures on the parallel side.

There's no concrete evidence or hint as to what she does with the information she collects, and for all purposes and effects, I can presume that she's gathering this knowledge to assist in the discovery of countermeasures and vaccination studies. I might as well argue that she is a Chinese spy who is working against European and North-American capitalism and the imperialism that creates such monsters like the biochemical and bioweapons industry and that her real objective is to dismantle the market for bioweapons and bioterror supported mainly by the USA (see: Simmons and The Family).

That is, as long as it is unclear what her true purpose is, I have the freedom to surmise whatever the heck I want and that all of what she's been doing was for the sake of the greater "good" - and I'll even have canon moments to support this reasoning as it's clear that she regularly sabotages her customers (customers that are unquestionably established as playing for the "evil" side, with perverse intentions) - throughout the franchise. She did this on RE2, RE4, RE6 and Damnation. It's there, transparent in canon, people just choose to ignore it.

She laughs in the face of whoever she's talking to by the end of Damnation, saying she doesn't intend to deliver the Plaga; she scoffs at Simmons; she betrays Wesker and kills Krauser. She had been sabotaging Wesker for so long, that he sent Krauser to be the main agent in the mission in Spain, and Ada was just a "side effect" that he didn't have in control and had to keep an eye on, so he ordered Krauser to keep tabs on her. It's not a mutually beneficial dynamic. Ada doesn't want Wesker to succeed, she despises him; this is clear in the games in which they interact. There are even files that indicate that she was trying to double-cross and get in the way of his plans for at least 2 years before Spain, and he was constantly catching up with her. See here and here.

On her end, Mia was employed by and consciously working for a criminal syndicate.

vi) a (secretly) helping hand

oh, I'm a master pretender

just felt more alone

the further I'd go

but I'll stick around

I'll be your master defender

yeah, I'll stick around. ⁕

Ada approached characters such as John Clemens and Luis Sera, and both had a canonical intention to, in addition to putting an end to their connections with the criminal companies and organizations they've been working for, also expose and denounce them for their crimes. It's in this context that Ada comes into contact with them. And why is that?

Check John's background: he had made up his mind about disclosing Umbrella's crimes to the public. Check Luis' background: Ada went to Spain to assist in his extradition since he feared for his own life if he resolved to turn his back on the cult of Los Illuminados, and also dreaded the consequences of the liberation of Las Plagas on an international scale.

Keep in mind that Ada handed over to Wesker a USELESS Plaga sample. Wesker only got the sample currently circulating in the underground market because he went after Krauser's body. We don't know what Ada did with the master Plaga sample she obtained. We only know from Ada's Report and the Plaga Recovery file that she didn't deliver it to Wesker, and he needed to go out for a plan B to get it.

Even the G-Virus sample that fell into the hands of the clandestine business, it's possible to argue that Ada's involvement in it was flimsy, since Simmons CANONICALLY made over a thousand laboratory tests in Sherry, and, as we know, he was a leading figure in bioterrorism and bioweapons trading with the aid of his position in the US government.

But, guess what, Ada clearly is a non-white character with obvious Chinese heritage and Mia is white, so of course, OF COURSE, someone can so nonchalantly affirm that Ada, this "vile bitch", is somehow WORSE than Mia. The same Mia who watched the Bakers being destroyed. Right.

Also: trying to validate one's point by claiming anything related to the misogyny present in RE franchise, while IN THE SAME BREATH AND TWEET reducing Ada's entire character arc to that of "a sociopathic bitch cured by the magic dick of her love interest" is supposed to be a joke, right? No, really. Joke.

conclusion and a word against misogyny

we are waiting on a telegram to

give us news of the fall

I am sorry to report

dear Paris is burning after all

we have taken to the streets

in open rejoice, revolting

we are dancing a black waltz

fair Paris is burning after all. ⁕

To any Ada fan that has been reading this so far: PLEASE, I ask to consider refraining to use the "oh yes, Ada did some bad shit, bUT" take to defend the character because that isn't sustained by canon in RE, lmao. She didn't do anything evil that had an indisputable bad impact on the plot and other characters arcs. For one, I myself do love some villains, but that isn't the case with Ada.

She did do some unconventional shit yes, since she's a morally GRAY character and an anti-heroine, but by the end of the day, each and every action of hers had a positive impact on the journey of other characters and main plot. Just pay attention to it.

Like idk man, Black Widow, Elektra Natchios, Scarlet Witch and Black Cat from Marvel, Catwoman from DC, Yennefer from The Witcher (some pop culture examples that come to mind).

Saying that this is an "extremely selfish prototypal bad bitch except when it comes to the magical redeeming dick of her love interest" it's a grotesque reduction of a complex female character, and, in its attempt to critique the misogyny present in RE's franchise an expression of misogyny in itself.

Remember: Ada has actions and impact on the franchise ASIDE and IN ADDITION to her romantic involvement with Leon.

#Resident Evil #Ada Wong #Leon x Ada #Ada x Leon #Aeon #Leon Kennedy #[mine]#[meta]#//#Aeon fandom

29 notes · View notes

thefanficmonster · 3 years

Note

Hey Vy, 📚🌻 here!

I was on a video call with a friend of mine and she said: oh, do you still like Corpse?

I opened my mouth and she said instantly "i shouldn't have asked...", I mean I know that I do talk a lot about him but-- I can't blame her, after she said that I re-told her about his life and how cool he is and about the songs and the merch and---

Well, today I'm here to give you your next three words, which are: Alarm, recorder (the instrument that's also called flute), Crayons

Btw, today's music recomendation is: And so it went by The pretty reckless featuring Tom Morello. Actually the new The Pretty Reckless album is full of great songs but and so it went is my favorite!

Love, 📚🌻

Hi darling 📚🌻 !

I felt your experience with your friend on a personal level 😅 I've had that happen to me several times too. Don't worry though, I bet everyone in the Corpse fandom has experienced something similar at least once 😂

Thank you for yet another great music recommend, you're literally THE BEST 😘

Today's fic will be a father-daughter fic for the special occasion of Father's Day. Prepare to see a side of Gwen rarely seen by the world.

~ Enjoy 💕

Mission

Pairing: Ethan Winters & Daughter OC (Gwen Winters)

Warnings: None :)

Genre: FLUFF, Domestic Fluff

Being on vacation and all, the last thing Gwen expected was to hear her alarm blaring at 7 AM. Thinking she has set it on accident, she turns it off and rolls over in an attempt to prolong her slumber. However, much to her horror, seconds later she hears the door to her bedroom open, feeling a shake to her shoulder shortly after.

"Gwen, it's time to get up." Ethan's familiar voice floods the room as a hushed whisper, gently waking up the twenty-three-year-old.

"What do you want, dad?" Gwen grumbles, face 90% hidden in her pillow as she refuses to give a response to the continuous tries on Ethan's part of getting her out of bed.

Him and Mia have been her adoptive parents for a little less than a decade at this point and yet, her referring to them as ‘mom’ and ‘dad’ still catches them off-guard sometimes in the best way possible. Never fails to make them smile too.

“I wanted to go shopping for some toys for Rose while Mia’s asleep.“ Ethan explains when Gwen finally rolls over to face him.

She gives him a lazy smile, “Why? Cause you know she’ll say you’re gonna flood the house with toys by the time she’s even a year old?”

He sheepishly nods, “It’s not my fault there are so many cool toys at the store and I just can’t help myself.” He shrugs, “Though, I know she’ll still be the most obsessed with that monkey you got her.”

She sits up as a pointless attempt at hiding the little emotional spark that his words lit up in her, “Give me fifteen minutes, I’ll meet ya downstairs.”

With a grateful nod and a grin Ethan exits her room, quietly closing the door behind him.

* * *

“Dad, what is a less-than-a-year-old baby gonna do with crayons? It clearly says they’re meant for three-year-olds and above.“ Gwen rolls her eyes, snatching the 24 crayon packet from Ethan who’s been super indecisive on what to get. She’s only there to give him opinions, seeing as how she could never choose a proper toy for a baby. Well, one cannot be sure how true that is since Rose’s favorite toy was a gift to her by Gwen - maybe she’s got some skills she doesn’t know about after all.

“Why not? You can draw too. You’re older than three, right?“ He turns to look at her with teasingly narrowed eyes and a barely contained smile.

It manages to get a laugh out of her which makes him feel quite accomplished. She rolls her eyes and puts the pack of crayons back on the shelf, “I may be older than three but I bet you Rose could draw a better picture than I can. I suck at drawing, which is why I’m never allowed to illustrate the plans to the squad. Piers is the only one who understands what I’m trying to describe.” Gwen shakes her head as the two continue down the aisle. She struggles to keep her mind focused on the current task and not let it wander. God forbid she lets it roam, it’ll bring her no good whatsoever.

It’ll start wondering why she feels homesick while being at home. That question is not one she wants answered - not honestly at least.

“Really? Only Piers?“ Ethan nudges the topic cautiously, glancing at Gwen out of the corner of his eye to make sure she won’t pounce at him. Truth be told, you can never be sure with Gwen, she’s highly unpredictable.

But when he sees her sigh, he’s pretty darn relieved.

“No...not only Piers.“ Is all she says, but her words speak louder than their meaning, explaining to Ethan a lot more than what she’s willing to say out loud for herself.

The toll this subject takes on her is painfully obvious so the blond man decides not to continue pursuing it. Instead he hums knowingly before reaching for another toy and showing it to her as a distraction, “Well, maybe you suck at drawing, but I bet you can play the recorder like a professional.”

This earns him another laugh, a more wholehearted one, coming straight from the bottom of her soul, honest and genuine. And grateful, grateful he got her mind off the BSAA and....and everything else.

She links her arm with his, resting her head on his shoulder, taking the recorder from him to put it back where he took it from. Still, she mumbles, “Thanks dad.”

Again: few words, a lot of meanings and one important message he hears loud and clear.

“Anytime, Gwen.“

20 notes · View notes

maeviana · 3 years

Text

Lorelai Gilmore & Luke Danes Analysis & how I would change the story

A Lorelai Gilmore analysis because apparently I'm doing this for everyone on the show now!

Lorelai Gilmore...how do I begin to describe Lorelai Gilmore. There are times when Lorelai can be my favourite character and times where she can be my least favourite character.

I think Lorelai denying the fact that she is still very privileged despite leaving her parents world when she was 16 is one reason she can drive me up the walls. Lorelai is a conventionally attractive white woman who fits the trope of 'single mom but my child is really smart so men don't see it as a turn off' - she seems to be able to get any guy she wants, the whole town falls at her feet and are willing to do pretty much anything to help her, she was promoted to Manager seemingly above Michelle (who actually went to school to train to be a concierge or whatever he is and who we know started at the same time as Lorelai) Lorelai has all the advantages of someone who spent their whole life in a small town but whenever she needs it or wants it she always has her parents money to fall back on or their connections which I get makes her uncomfortable and I don't hold her privilege against her - no but what I can hold against her is the fact that Lorelai Gilmore is not a pay it forward kind of gal.

When I say that Lorelai is not very "pay it forward" I'm going to talk about three incidents where Lorelai benefitted from something in the past which she does not need anymore and which she very begrudgingly relinquishes.

1. The first is when Suki wants to ask her if Rune can sleep in the potting shed while he is out of work. Lorelai's response to this is "Suki that's where Rory and I stayed when she was a baby" Just to recap Lorelai was allowed to stay in the potting shed rent free when Rory was growing up until Rory was 11 until she could afford to get a place of her own. Which is fine. But Lorelai has her own place now and now she is in a position to help someone else who could use the same help that she was once given and her first instinct is to keep it for herself which is made worse by the fact that Suki is asking her - Suki is Head Chef at the Inn and so she equals Lorelai in rank - as long as Rune staying in the shed doesn't interfere with the running of the inn, it should not be Lorelai's place to deny her.

2. When Jess comes to town. When Jess comes to town Lorelai doubts Luke's ability to care for a rebellious teen - which again is fine. She tries to reach out to Jess twice and ....things don't go well which I also think is fine (except for her essentially telling Jess that Dean is better than him ummm wtf Lorelai he's 17) ...look I could do a whole other post about Lorelai and Jess' interactions (Jess is my absolute favourite character on the show so you can probably guess what I'm going to say) and why they don't get on but I'm going to focus on Lorelai's reaction to the car crash and what she says to Luke in 'Teach Me Tonight' when Luke tells her he has an obligation to Jess and she responds that he had an obligation to the town and to her and to Rory. We are shown and we are told that Luke has done a lot for Lorelai and would do a lot for someone that he cares about, however, I think again that on some level Lorelai thinks of Luke's generosity towards her as a special privilege just her own. I don't think Lorelai views Jess as someone like herself who needs a "Mia" or a "Luke" to help him get through a difficult time to let him stay in a metaphorical emotional "potting shed" but look having said that she does cut Jess some breaks and does help Luke understand things about Jess.

3. Her not wanting Mia to sell the Independence Inn because she wanted a memory home....ummm what. the. fuck?

Growing up Emily tried to control almost every aspect of Lorelai's life and this has impacted Lorelai by her being ultra controlling in her own life. I think her need to have complete control over her life made it very difficult for her to get serious with anyone because to do so you need to have a 50/50 say in a shared life. I think it's really telling that her two major love interests even over the guy she was engaged to are two men who have been in her life the longest.

I think at the end of the day when it comes to relationships Lorelai just wants someone to love her and to listen to her. She wants someone who would be willing to sleep on a park bench outside her window and someone to call at 2am. i think Emily and Richard we’re a real unit in their household and I think Emily was a Wife first, a lady of high society second and a mother third. Richard was well emotionally shut down and was all about appearances. But Emily and Richard work well as a unit, they are kind of like Lorelai and Rory that way they have their own way of doing things, their own language. I think it was hard for Lorelai growing up an only child next to that kind of relationship but not on the inside.

The story line I'm most annoyed about the writers dropping for Lorelai was the story line of her now living her life as an adult woman without a child - about her not wanting to be pregnant. The offer from her Dad's friend to buy the inn and for her to go travelling by herself! But if there is one thing that comes for all television characters in shows in the 00s it's hetero normative ideals those relentless bitches! Because...here is the thing I think that the life Rory thinks she wants for herself travelling and seeing the world as an independent woman that life is really the life that Lorelai wants. Lorelai is very like her Dad and she even says that she wants to travel like her Dad always travelled and I'm so annoyed that THAT wasn't the major Luke and Lorelai conflict instead of April Nardini. (who I think was in part written as a way to give Luke a biological child of his own and still get with Lorelai ....because again hetero-normativity) (its a trope *cough* How I met your mother *cough*) That's why the whole "Wild" trip was written for Lorelai in my opinion it's because Lorelai does want to go out and have an adventure and she does want to find herself. What's more annoying about this story line being dropped though is because the seeds for it being a major Luke and Lorelai conflict are there. Dean telling Luke that Lorelai wants more than Stars Hollow, Lorelai's curiousity about the job offer from her Dad's friend and Lukes reaction to that, Lorelai realising that some of her aversion to certain paths in life come from her parents wanting them for her which may include "going corporate" which could open doors for travel. That’s how Luke lost the last love of his life - Rachel. It was potrayed that she was always leaving - but it could also be interpreted as Luke never following her. Then Lorelai wants to travel to run incorporations of an inn that Rachel introduced her to through her pictures.

Think about it Luke's major character flaw is that he finds change very difficult. He lives in the same town he has lived in his whole life, he doesn't change his clothes, he can't make a move. This made sense for Luke before - he needed to be so solid because his family was so erratic, he needed to be there for his dad, he needed to be there to bail his sister out but at the end of the show Luke has no reason not to change, his business is well established enough that he could trust Ceasar to run it while he was away, he (would not have had) any children, any real reason to stay in the town other than stubbornness.

I don't find April annoying as a character - I find why she was written annoying. Luke didn't need a kid. The show is filled with biological parent child relationships that don't work, that show that bonds are more about being there for someone than being in their DNA. I feel like writing as if Luke needs to have a child is just weird (it's stated and shown on multiple occasion he in fact really doesn't like kids), when he's been a relative hermit up to age what 35/40 means that maybe he'd be ok without kids and the fact that Luke is loved like a father by Jess and by Rory but no Luke needs biological children because? why?

And then Jess (who was always ready to leave and never shows his cards when it comes to love) could show up and tell him that he should go be with Lorelai wherever , that he’ll make sure Liz and TJ don’t join any vegetable cults. Because Luke now has someone else in his family that he can rely on and he doesn’t have to plan funerals and interventions for his crazy family members on his own and also the this plot line would fall in nicely with the GG theme song but that’s not that big of a deal.

#gilmore girls #rory gilmore #lorelai gilmore #lorelei gilmore #GG #luke danes #jess mariano

32 notes · View notes

artificialqueens · 3 years

Text

Somewhere in the Crowd There's You (Rosnali) - Joley

(bonus: denali's playlist for rosé)

ao3 link