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#are a specific kind of bard
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we've all seen alignment charts for writers, but I'm more interested in seeing character sheets
(btw, SPaG stands for Spelling, Punctuation, and Grammar)
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drewpicturesani · 3 months
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The Traveller
So Chants of Sennaar is a good game-
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hella1975 · 1 year
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made my first dnd character ever and she's a total cunt and i love her
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custom-whats · 2 years
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its crazy to me to think that characters that don’t exist within actual tes lore are becoming so vital to people’s ocs, their stories, and the player’s experience in skyrim . that’s a really beautiful thing i think. we’re all just adding in things to an ever expanding world that’s becoming kind of our own creation with every new element we add
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the-gayest-sky-kid · 1 year
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What’s the Genshin elnea au?
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IM GLAD YOU ASKED!!!!!!
heres the tag for it
heres the starter post with my ideas
heres @tysly blog of my beloved mutual who is working with me on it!!!!!
the genshin elnea au is a crossover au for genshin impact and the mobile/switch game elnea kingdom !!!! its like a.... fantasy life sim? where you have one character and you control them until its time to pass onto the next generation.
so we've been placing genshin characters into an elnea kingdom setting, as one does when they combine hyperfixations !
for example, venti and paimon are the crown prince and the princess of the kingdom respectively, with the ruling monarch being queen istaroth. im still unsure who exactly the king is but im gonna say decarabian.
dilucs story stays pretty similar, with crepus failing to join the knights so instead becoming vice representative of the farming association. then diluc rises to a high position in the knights at a young age. after his father dies and him and kaeya fall out he becomes a traveler. once he returns he starts working at the tavern under wiala who is an npc from the original game.
so all the mondstadt characters have a concept rn at least in the original post, except for mika because he didn't exist yet. I'll come up with something for him eventually! out of the other characters, childe nahida and scara all have some sort of idea already (with scaras being the most fleshed out).
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mokeonn · 4 months
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Man I gotta get started on that dnd comic idea I've had for a while because if yall like Poetry yall are REALLY gonna like Mystery
#simon says#I might actually make Mystery and Poetry 'sisters'#it's in quotes because Poetry is an Asmodeus tiefling and Mystery is a reborn#to be more specific#Mystery is a Reborn made of 3 Zariel tieflings an Asmodeus tiefling a white dragonborn and a gnome#they're both tieflings but Poetry is also a bard and they're different kinds of tieflings. one fae one infernal#but I think they'd get along well#but yeah I realized 'oh boy if yall like this little pink ball of sunshine get ready for a little yellow ball of sunshine!'#I'll have to draw art tomorrow after work but I do like the idea of Mystery and Poetry being found family of some sort#mainly because I think they would get along#they're both silly little warlocks#but yeah I really need to get that dnd comic idea started#i had this idea for a while and im really attached to it#i wanna get back into making comics and I wanna use these dnd characters while not getting rid of their dnd-ness#I'll probably post about it more this year#i got like two projects im working on out of passion and my love of the crafts (video games and comics)#but I'm also working on making an income from my art or just finding a job i enjoy that suits me#whatever comes first#but yeah I am absolutely gonna talk about my characters more soon because I love them so much and I just KNOW yall will love them too#they're very loveable little guys#a group of the fantasy equivalent of 20-something adventurers#specifically 4 of them#i HAVE been debating on adding one more but that might just be a later addition to the cast or not at all#I'll absolutely post about them more as I work on the comic#I'm worried about posting about it now since like#the designs could change??#like the characters themselves are set in stone but i am STRUGGLING with outfit design#gonna have to figure out some comfy camp outfits or something so I can draw and post them here before I decide on their main outfits#except Cardamon he's perfect just the way he is#I got his wizardly swag down perfectly on the second try
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blooming-cecilia · 2 years
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thinking about himmel and venti and how aoku kakero fits them actually
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homunculus-argument · 10 months
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I've never really had the proper opportunity to play, but I fucking love reading peoples' DnD stories online. Yeah the stories people end up sharing are just the highlight reels and the greatest hits in sessions that might not have been that fun all the way through, but I read them the same way that people who don't play sports watch sports on the TV.
Like this one I read years ago but still remember. There was a party where the only human was their Pretty Boy Idiot Bard (the funniest type of bard) with next to nothing in intelligence but wildly high charisma, making him vital as the murderhobo party's Public Relations in any kind of negotiations, but absolutely useless anywhere else. Nobody else but the DM and the bard's player enjoyed that stuff more than combat and dungeons so the DM peppered in a lot of opportunities for the band to literally get away with murder just because That One Is So Pretty.
And the party in question ends up entering a fairly standard-looking dungeon, in search for a specific item. The one telling the story was playing a tiefling rogue, and at this point she noticed that the bard's player and the DM had shot a few "I noticed that you noticed that I noticed it too" sort of trying-not-to-laugh glances, and suspected that something was up, but decided not to say anything, in-character or out.
They end up encountering a chasm on the dungeon floor, a seemingly endless ravine that none of them could jump or climb over, and stop to figure out how to cross it. Another player character - a half-elf - asks if any of them can see anything they could use as a tool, maybe something they could use to build a bridge. Before anyone starts doing perception checks, the bard speaks up.
"I don't know. I went blind, like, two hours ago."
And at this point the rest of the party realises that they don't have a torch, or anything that'd give them light. The bard is the only one in the party who doesn't have darkvision. He hasn't seen shit for the entire time they've been in the dungeon. And he's too damn stupid to figure out why.
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pidgedee · 1 year
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BEHOLD!! the party!
more info about this au under the cut because i love it So Much
first of all, you can read what i’ve written of this au here on ao3! it’s only backstory oneshots rn, but i do have a whole timeline plotted out that i’d love to keep chipping away at. but it’s taking me forever so here’s a little summary w some spoilers!
basically:
- tommy and wilbur meet when tommy is this twelve year old scruffy little street kid and wilbur is a traveling charlatan bard. tommy steals from him. wilbur casts hold person and goes “hey you fucker give me my goddamn wallet” and tommy goes 🤩 “ok but only if you show me how to do that” and because wilbur is easily manipulated by tommy’s charming street urchin ways, he agrees. and now they’re literal crime boys and travel together stealing and conning As Brothers <3
- tubbo was raised by a cult that believes he’s a prophesied savior, so tubbo ALSO believes he’s a prophesied savior. scott smajor is a divination wizard and part of the cult. one day some stranger wanders into the cult, realizes Oh My God This Cult Is Raising A Kidnapped Child, gets in over his head, murders a cult member (not scott smajor), and causes such a ruckus that tubbo gets kidnapped 2 electric boogaloo by a surviving cult member (this time it is scott smajor). a chaotic and bloody series of events ends with tubbo completely alone in the world and not sure where to go. luckily, there’s a certain bard-rogue duo to swoop him up and pull him into their party!
- quackity is Not a warlock no really guys seriously he’s just some guy. he’s just some guy who once accidentally wandered into a cult and murdered one of the cult members (they had it coming ok) and then sold his heart to a devil who, uh, took out the entire cult after that. we connecting the dots here? yeah. when quackity meets the rest of the gang, he and tubbo stand there spiderman meme pointing at each other but in Total Secret because neither of them are eager to reveal their backstories yet. tubbo kind of hates quackity. quackity does not know what to think of tubbo. it’s fun.
i’m cutting myself off here so i don’t ramble forever but IVE ALSO DONE SO MUCH WORLDBUILDING specifically regarding religion in this au. Ask Me About My D&D AU Pantheon
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noellefan101 · 3 months
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Nick-Names - Genshin
Characters: Xiao, Scaramouche, Venti, Lyney, Albedo, Kaveh, Thoma, Diluc, Childe, Heizou, Kazuha x GN reader
Warnings: a lot of cheesy and weird nicknames, if you dont like some for a specific char you're welcome to send me your ideas, could be modern au, established relationship
(you can clearly see that i prob put in an OC, so im so sry, but some i just also really head-canon as the "would rather date a loving person than be loving" if you get what i mean)
Summary: both of your pet names for each other, some silly some sweet
Note: you can really tell where i had no ideas for nicknames. and ik i use both 'pet names' and 'nicknames' but im just kinda stupid and didnt care to change stuff when i was already done with it. also i may just have a problem but why does princess sound 10x better than prince, no matter your gender, anyway love youuuu
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Xiao
He will always say what is on his mind, and he did the same thing when you brought up using pet names. he wasn't very fond of the idea, and sometimes he still isn't(depending on the situation). but he has gotten used to it more over time, like when you burst open his door and to talk to him while using the most absurd nicknames he´s ever heard of.
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Pet names for you: lovely, qinxing, [shorter version of your name](sry people with short names, i fell ya)
Pet names for him: babe, baby, cutie, dove, birdy, my alatus
Scaramouche
Will never admit he likes being called weird things by you, EVER. if he did then he was drunk and he was totally lying. and that counts with calling you stuff as well, he would rather die than admit he doesn't just call you that bc you wanted him to.
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Pet names for you: idiot, princess/prince, dear
Pet names for him: smoochi, love
Venti
He was probably the one who suggested the idea at first, like two days/weeks (seconds) into your relationship. i also think he already had at least one nickname for you when you were "just friends", in the crushing phase, and has some for all his other friends as well(prob also his teachers if school au, lul).
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Pet names for you: windblume, cecilia, [insert the cheesiest thing you can think of], my love
Pet names for him: venni, my dear, sweetheart, my bard
Lyney
He would be over the moon if you gave him a nickname, and would instantly be looking like a tomato too. would increase its usage by tenfolds if you said you liked one of his nicknames. you cannot stop him even if you somehow got 'Father' involved.
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Pet names for you: babe, mon trésor, mon amour, beautiful
Pet names for him: sweetie, amour, lyn
Albedo
He didn't really see a use for it at first, finding it kind of useless. but sooner or later realized how happy you looked when he had somehow slipped up and called you 'love' when he needed your assistance. and later just didn't bother to stop.
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Pet names for you: love, my cecelia, my dear
Pet names for him: 'bedo, lovely, (my) genius
Kaveh
He LOVES nick-names, probably made one for everyone in the friend group(yk alhaitham, tighnari n cyno), and would be delighted to make some up for you.
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Pet names for you: beloved, lovely
Pet names for him: baby,
Thoma
He really wanted to try using them, yes he calls Ayato and Ayaka my lord and my lady, but its just not the same as calling your lover something sweet. and good luck if you don't like it, he's keeping those names forever.
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Pet names for you: babe, sweetheart, baby, sleepyhead, lovely
Pet names for him: babe, love
Diluc
He honestly wasn't a fan at first, he hated it even. but of course, you being you, insisted on using names for him, and encouraged him to at least try to use some for you. so he kinda got into routine with it.
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Pet names for you: my love, my dear
Pet names for him: dear, red head, love, my hero
Childe
Of course, he would use nick-names and such, he uses nick-names for the traveler and paimon, so of course he would be using such with you. honestly how could he not, especially when you're looking all cute cuddled up in his hoodie.
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Pet names for you: my love, beloved, cupcake
Pet names for him: ginger, ma strong man(only for teasing purposes), hubby
Heizou
He'll almost never call you by your actual name, he didnt even when you two were just friends, only in the most serious of times would he do that. so it was no surprise that when you actually started dating, they could only become sweeter and cheesier as time goes by.
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Pet names for you: princess/prince, baby, beautiful, (my) sunshine
Pet names for him: hei, zou-zou, babe
Kazuha
He loves it bc no matter what you call him he'll be happy. and he makes sure you have "some" as well, and i guess he just can't stop coming up with more, and they're always more cheesy than the last. you don't know how he does it, but maybe its just his poetry skills coming through.
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Pet names for you: dove, (my) love, sweetheart, sweetie, my dear
Pet names for him: kazu, dear
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thank u for reading whatever this thing is(totally not a filler bc i habe been working on that streamer au for too long), luv ya-Masterlist
You are welcome to reblog and like any of my posts, but you CAN NOT translate, copy or hate on anybody for liking my posts
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feyascorner · 3 months
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8 | The Fangs Between Us
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summary. You try to swat him away, but his thumb swipes the droplets of blood to the side of your face, staring down at you with eyes that resemble rubies. You’ve always loved them, describing them as the gems you’ve stumbled across in such dire times, but now all you want to do is look away. They’re too harsh. They’re too cold. They’re too him.
You swallow the lump in your throat as he licks your blood off the pad of his thumb.
“It would’ve been better if one of us died that day.”
warnings. angst, comfort, slow burn, tav reader is a bard, italics are flashbacks
pairing. Astarion x GN!Reader
parts. TFBU masterlist
a/n. a little peek at what this guy is thinking before i move onto act 2 of this fic!! <3 also this specific flashback is not the usual pre breakup flashback it's right after the blushing mermaid incident !!
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His nightmares have long stopped making him sick.
The same dreams where Cazador would have shackles around his neck and wrists, laughing maniacally while he carves runes into Astarion’s flesh, no longer bring him the same dread the morning after. Instead, he feels a kind of numbness that spreads past his physical being into the mindless stare he bores into the ceiling. Even before the birds awaken outside the city, it's quiet in the morning. This eerie sense of stillness used to be his favorite time of day.
Because when there’s nobody outside, there’s nobody to bring to Cazador.
Now, it feels too empty. Too alone. As if he’s the only person left in Faerun.
With nobody but his own mind, he begins to replay the events of the last few months. No matter how many times he does it, it doesn’t seem quite real. The nautiloid, the grove, the underdark—all of it. From the second he first bathed in the sun’s glory to the second he lost it all anyway, it doesn’t seem real.
It doesn’t seem real that he once had someone to care for him.
But he supposes he’s mistaken. He’s had plenty of affection throughout his centuries lurking on the city's streets, albeit rare for something genuine. Regardless, it did happen. Like Sebastian or other fleeting victims of Cazador who weren’t as crude as his usual prey. Genuine people whose biggest crime was falling for Astarion’s charms at the wrong time and place.
He doesn’t remember most of their faces anymore. He’s given up on trying to.
And like clockwork, his mind fades to the moment he first tasted humanoid blood as he begins to zone out from a particular part of the ceiling. A proper meal, rather than those disgusting rats on cellar floors he’s been allowed for most of his vampiric life. He remembers the liquid gold sliding down his throat and the sheer energy that came with it—some of which he hadn’t even known he had. He recalls the heavenly metallic taste of your lifeline. How, despite all the blood, all he could smell was your soap. How hot you’d felt against his own cold and unforgiving husk of a body.
Astarion swallows, forcing himself to focus on the chipped wood on one part of the ceiling.
While on any other occasion, he’d remind himself that he’d never have a taste of you again, you had given it to him. Even though he swore all the gods above were against his odds, you’d offered him your blood as he lay pathetically against the walls of the Blushing Mermaid.
But it had been different this time. Instead of that soft smile you’d give him when he’d drink from you in the past, all that remained was a stern frown. You hadn’t run your fingers through his curls and instead chose to grit your teeth, forcing your eyes away from where he bit into your wrist. Your generosity hadn’t been one stemming from affection but one of necessity.
You had flinched away from his touch.
He’s not surprised. In fact, he should’ve expected you to shove him away the second his mouth neared your skin, and he did expect it. But instead, all you’d done was brace yourself—as if you hated his touch—and forced yourself to stay still for his sake. It was akin to watching himself endure the skin of so many strangers in hopes of convincing them into Cazador’s dungeon all those years ago. He knows it’s not the same. He knows this, but hells, did he hate how dry his throat felt after, despite feeling satiated.
He would’ve preferred if you’d just left him there to bleed.
He hates that you hadn’t done so.
He hates that you hadn’t let him ascend.
He hates that he’s forced to live alongside you.
He hates you.
Before he can tell what he’s doing, he’s standing in front of your bed. How he got here is a blur, but he has a dagger in one hand and a fist in the other. You lie blissfully asleep, unaware of the blood-red eyes that stare down at you in a daze, illuminated by nothing but the moonlight peering through the windows. He takes a moment to take in the state of your room–and though he’s not shocked at the mess scattered around the ground and desks, he’s not pleased by it either.
“Gods, how do you even live like this?” he asks, as if you can hear him.
He glances at the glint of his blade and then at your sleeping face. The same face once peppered at least a hundred kisses against his cheek, laughing loudly when he’d feign annoyance at the marks left behind. You’d only snickered then, tackling him into an embrace and allowing him to return the sentiments. Those same lips of yours are now chewed raw, almost a bloody red.
“I could finish this endless fight right now,” he whispers, his grip tightening around the handle of your blade. “I could wake you with this knife at your throat, and you’d have no choice but to kill me. I’d return the violence, of course, but only one of us would live. There would be no use fighting any longer.”
Your chest only rises and falls steadily, and he notices he hasn’t seen you at such peace since he last slept beside you all those months ago. He doesn’t see the same expression anymore because when you look at him now, it’s always accompanied by furrowed brows or a downward quirk of your lips.
He wishes you would respond.
“Ha,” he scoffs pitifully, dropping his hand. He places the blade in its rightful place on your bedside table again and sighs. “This is much too pathetic of a death for either of us. If we were to kill one another, it should be done properly—not in this mess of a room.”
With one last pathetic scan at the details of your face, he turns to leave. But before he can even reach the door, he hears a soft gasp from your bed.
For a moment, he thinks he’s been caught.
When he whips around, all he sees is your clearly asleep form, yet this time, there is no peace in your expression. Instead, it’s scrunched up into a painful grimace as your fingers grasp at your sheets and your mouth falls open to take in breaths of air that don’t come to you. He thinks you might be choking on god knows what until one of your hands flies to your throat. Your nails claw at a collar he can’t see.
He glances at his own hands.
Oh.
Astarion slowly paces back to his spot beside your bed, watching as you writhe against nothing but the air. He realizes you’re not suffocating, but it sure looks that way. He doesn’t know what to do besides watch blankly with wide eyes, but fortunately for him, the moment doesn’t last long. In seconds, your hand falls from your throat, and you continue to grimace painfully. Still, you’re no longer choking.
The bruises have faded, but only physically.
The vampire feels his hand inching toward you but freezes, unable to bring himself within a foot of your restless body without doing something he’d regret. His mind flashes back to how you’d flinched away from his touch, and it’s enough to make him drop your hand again. And being unable to decipher what he’s supposed to feel, he just stares at the wetness of your lashes, his jaw tight.
His voice is rough as he speaks.
“You foolish bard.”
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“You’re one of the Gur children.”
“So what if I am,” the small child, too frail for her age despite the fangs protruding from her gums, crosses her arms, huffing. It’s been mere minutes since you managed to sit her down on the forest grounds, bent down on one knee to reach her eye level, but she remains positively stubborn, glaring at the other vampire spawn who stands idly by your side while twirling a comb in his fingers. “That doesn’t change anything.”
“It’s important. You were turned recently, then, weren’t you?” you frown, and a flicker of recognition passes her before it vanishes again. “Why are you alone? Where are the other kids?”
“That’s what you want to ask?” Astarion hisses from your side, his hands stopping. “Stop indulging such trivial questions and demand to know whether the little brat was the one to kill that poor husband. The clock is ticking, and I still have to hunt.”
You snap in his direction. “Will you stop it? She’s a child.”
“A spawn—she’s a spawn. Get it right, darling, she’s no child.”
“You’re acting like a nine-year-old yourself.”
“Ha! As cute as it is that you’re attempting to insult me, let’s leave the lines to me, hm? Your delivery couldn’t be less enthusiastic if you tried.”
“This isn’t a joke, Astarion.”
“I didn’t say it was.”
You glare at him, and he glares straight back. The smallest of snorts, stifled by a hand, comes from Berry, and you both turn to look at her in an instant. By the time you do, she’s already back to huffing, her brows furrowed.
With an exhausted sigh, your shoulders slump. “So, did you kill Roger Highberry? Was everything an act?”
She hesitates, and though you dare to believe that what you see is sorrow, she wipes it away with a blink of an eye, gaze glued to the ground before her. “I didn’t kill him. I didn’t lie.”
“Do you think we’re idiots?” You nearly roll your eyes at his voice. “You’re telling me a spawn—one that’s been newly turned, might I add—wouldn’t go ballistic at the sight of fresh blood sleeping soundly just a room over each night?”
“I didn’t!” she spits, baring her teeth. “And I’m not talking to you! I don’t want to talk to you, you—you—asshat!”
It’s apparent that it’s her first time using the word, but you don’t bother mentioning it.
“You wretched little–!”
“Berry,” you sigh for the umpteenth time, ignoring the fuming elf behind you. “I want to believe you, but I need you to be honest. And when I say honest, I mean absolutely everything. Including why you followed me out here and tried to attack me earlier.”
She falters. And almost shamefully, she looks down at her hands again. “...I ran away from the other spawns. I didn’t want to be with them anymore, and I pretended to be an orphan to stay with Cora and Roger.”
“What?” you blink. “Why would you do that?”
“Ulma taught us vampires are evil for the blood they take from people,” she mumbles. “I didn’t want to be evil too. Even if it means leaving my friends.”
As she speaks, her face dawns with a wave of solemnness–one too familiar to yourself.
“If you’re not with the others, why did you send me to the Blushing Mermaid knowing that there’d be an ambush?” you finally ask, gentler than you should be with how Astarion impatiently taps his foot behind you, but you couldn’t care less. “It could’ve killed us.”
“I wasn’t trying to kill you,” she blurts, searing eyes darting to your silver-haired companion. “I was trying to kill him. He tried to perform a ritual and kill the rest of us with the power he’d get…I might not be with my friends, but I don’t want them to die either. I don’t want to die.”
You feel your breath still. Astarion does the same, now unmoving from his spot. However, his shock stems more from offense. “Cazador would have rid of you anyway. You were doomed from the start.”
You glare at him, still maintaining a soft tone toward the girl. “He can’t harm you anymore, Berry. Nobody can.”
She points a finger at Astarion. “I can’t be sure until he’s gone!”
“Berry–” You reach toward her hand.
“I let you see Dalyria so you’d turn him in! Not to keep him!” she hisses, slapping you away with a snarl. “And the worst of all, you let him drink from you! You let someone who wants to kill the rest of us drink from you while the rest of us have to pay greatly just to survive! If you’re his friend, then I have to hate you too!”
Eyes going wide, you find yourself standing again, cheeks tinging red. “I—that was just–”
Astarion’s attention still seems elsewhere. “I don’t want to kill you, as appealing as it sounds at the moment. Even I don’t indulge in harming children, despite how annoying I find brats like you.”
“Stop lying!” she shrieks. “Petras said you’d kill us all! That the second you finish the ritual, you’d kill the rest of us to make sure you have no competitors. That there isn’t another person like you who’d go against the will of their very master—”
“Though it sounds positively delightful, I wouldn’t be the one doing all that bloodshed,” he snaps in return, fangs visible through the grit of his teeth. “It seems my dear brother has misinformed you. The ritual itself would’ve wiped you all—which would’ve been far better for the city, clearly—but I would only be making a choice. A sacrifice.”
While the two are too caught up in the wrath of their distaste for one another, realization quickly flashes across your eyes. Suddenly, you’re standing between the two, one hand inches from Astarion’s chest as a warning, while you keep Berry shielded behind your free arm. The act catches him off guard, and you think the downward curl of his lips should scare you. “And what do you think you’re doing?”
“Go hunt—or whatever it is that you do,” you demand, fingers inching closer to your weapon. It feels too dramatic, but you decide you can never be too safe. “I need to talk to her without you here to bicker and argue with a child.”
He scoffs. “Talk about what exactly? What more is there to know? You do realize that if I were to leave now, the brat would take another attempt at your life.”
“She’s a kid. I can take care of myself.”
“When you cowered behind me just minutes ago over a damn squirrel?”
Hells. You should drive a stake through his heart just for that.
Your eyes narrow. You might’ve entertained this quip on another occasion, but that moment is not now. “Go.”
His gaze flits from you back to the child, his expression indecipherable. You want to look away from his harsh stare, but your pride doesn’t dare allow you. And you’re thankful for it. “20 minutes then. 20 minutes only, and then I shall return.”
You nod.
With one last fleeting glance and a hesitant footstep, he turns on his heel, stalking to disappear into the darkness of the woods. It doesn’t take long because, after only a few dark strides and the rustling of leaves, he’s gone, leaving only you and the blazing vampire spawn behind you.
“Is that what Petras told you?” your brows furrow at Berry. “Is that what he told everyone else? That Astarion would’ve killed you once, he became an ascendant?”
She stares up at you, gaze blazing with rage. But there’s more to it. Loneliness, longing, and the most prominent: grief. Grief for the life that’s been taken away from her and reciprocated her payment in the form of fangs. She adjusts uncomfortably in her cloak, her tiny fists clenched at either of her sides.
Her silence is the answer you need.
This must be why the other spawn isn’t against the ascension. They can’t be against it because they don’t know how it works in the first place. Just as Astarion’s siblings believed the ascension would’ve rebirthed them alongside Cazador, the remaining 7000 spawns believe the same—almost ironic, in an endless cycle that repeats itself no matter what. They aren’t even aware of the ticking clock attached to their lifelines.
“Astarion wasn’t lying,” you say softly. “He wouldn’t have killed you after becoming an ascendant. He would’ve killed you becoming the ascendant. It’s the price of the ritual.”
She releases a frustrated grasp of her nails digging into her palm. “No, you’re just saying that because you’re his friend!”
“I’m not his friend,” you admit.
And despite expecting a pang of regret pulling at the strings of your heart as you say the words. No tightness in your chest, no dryness in your throat, and no shame for the lies pouring so effortlessly out of your lips. It makes you think that perhaps it’s not a lie. You dearly hope that’s the case.
“Then what are you?”
"I'm like you,” you say. "He tried to kill me too."
She frowns. “You let him drink from you. Nobody does that. Not for something like us.”
Your heart cracks a bit at her words, but you shake your head. “It was to keep him alive. To save him, as I intend to do for you.”
“You? You’ll save us?” she scoffs, clearly unconvinced, as she picks at the makeshift bandages wrapped around the wound on her arm. It’s a flimsy piece of cloth you tore from your cloak, but it’s better than risking it against whatever natural elements the forest offers. You gently pry her fingers away, preventing her from agitating the split skin.
“I did last time,” you remind her. “I’m the one that stopped Astarion from ascending—did Petras tell you that too?”
She falters. And while there’s an apparent hesitance in her eyes, there’s something behind all the rough exterior she’s built up from an undeniably traumatic experience of becoming a spawn. She looks up at you when you squeeze her tiny hand, almost hopeful. Because despite what irreparable damage the past few months have done to her, she remains a child. An innocent caught in a war of bloodshed. And what more can you gather from a child but hope?
“You want to stay with Cora, right?”
She nods sheepishly.
“Then you’ll stay with her,” you smile. “I’ll lend you my trust if you lend me yours, and you don’t run off anyway.”
“Promise?” You hold out a pinkie. She stares at it, but when she meets your eyes, she lifts her own hand to interlink with yours. For a moment, she almost looks like she's forgotten about the reality of her situation. That even if she were to live, she wouldn't be able to stay with Cora for long, given her inevitable nature.
How childish. Innocent. And you’d do anything to keep it from becoming more sinister.
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“You let the girl go?” After ensuring Berry returns to her room, Astarion repeats the question for the third time as you turn away from the Highberry household in utter disbelief. The cold night air sends chills down your skin, and you wrap your torn cloak tightly around yourself, walking straight past him. Despite your apparent intentions of ignoring him, he trails after you urgently, following no matter how quickly your steps take you through the dead stillness of the city. “And what if she decides to kill the wife?”
“She won’t.”
“You don’t know that,” he hisses. “What makes you so sure she can go against her very nature to kill just so she can stay in a bedroom she shares with four other kids? All of which are very appetizing meals to her, by the way.”
You shoot him a glare. “I’m sure you would know.”
“I do. Which is all the more reason for me to step in so we don’t have to deal with yet another dead body on our hands.”
“I don’t need advice from someone who wouldn’t hesitate to use a comb as a weapon.” You rub the side of your head to soothe your headache.
“Seeing as you set a spawn free into the city, I’d argue differently.”
“Will you just shut up?”
“I didn’t accompany you to be a pretty toy piece at your side, darling. With the foolish choices you’re making, I have no other choice but to nag,” he rolls his eyes. The snarkiness in his voice is enough to snap what remains of your already worn patience.
“And you think you’re allowed to give me advice?” you spin around to face him, stopping dead in your tracks. “In case you haven’t noticed, you’re basically a hostage! You don’t get to make decisions on what we do!”
“Well, who else will you get advice from now that all your little friends seem to have lost all respect for you?” 
Your jaw unhinges. He stands firm, arms crossed, and it’s enough to make your blood boil. “Gods, you’re—you’re such an asshole.”
Astarion laughs bitterly. “Care to tell me anything new?”
“About your personality? We’d be here all night. You’re also forgetting that I fought with the others for your sake, you bastard,” You step closer, teeth gnashing together. “I saved your life.”
“I would’ve survived with or without your help, darling.”
“You only got this far because our friends helped you!”
“Would you like me to be grateful?” he guffaws, and your chest tightens at how condescending it sounds. “Because must I remind you that you also stole the only chance of me escaping this filthy life where I rot away on the streets and feed on lowly criminals? You’ve forced me to be what I am, and now you think I’m indebted to you?”
Why does he keep saying that? You fight the urge to just punch him.
“I’m not saying you owe me anything, you fool!” your eyes meet his in a blaze of fire. Your heart beats rapidly, and you sincerely hope it’s gone unnoticed. “How many times do I have to tell you that I never forced you to do anything—I was stopping you from becoming like Cazador!”
He’s suddenly looming over you, his gaze sharper than before in a frenzied manner. Just mentioning his old master’s name is enough to push him on the offensive. “I never would’ve become like him…not after what that bastard did to me. I would’ve become stronger and been able to help you. Us. So why in the bloody hells you ever stopped me–”
The words pour out like a mountain of sand held by a twig, and you reach to grab the collar of his shirt. “I didn’t need help! Neither of us did, Astarion. It would’ve been hard, but we would’ve made it out like we always do if we just tried!”
You’re unsure you’ll make it out this time, but does it matter anymore?
His frown creases as if none of your pleas are getting through his thick skull. And while you have half a heart to keep blurting out whatever comes to your mind, his sudden silence and the smallest of steps he takes away from you make you seal your mouth shut. Like he’s closing the door again. Like he’s leaving you all alone again.
Your voice drops, and you bring your hand back to your side.
“You’re not being fair, Astarion.”
“Darling, I’ve followed all your stupid rules and remained on my best behavior till now, even when I could’ve caused more than a few casualties. Hells, I even watched that girl go back to the orphanage alive,” he says, quieter. “I’ve been more than fair.”
“That’s not what I’m talking about.”
“What is it, then?”
“It feels like you know everything I’m constantly thinking of, whether it be you or something else,” you mumble. “But you won’t let me know what you’re thinking. I’m not asking you to tell me your deepest secret…I just need to know what I’ve done to deserve the bullshit I have to put up with. I took away the ascension from you; I get that, but is that really it? Is that really why you hate me this much? What’s worse, is that very time it feels like we can finally talk, you just—you tell me that you hate me again and then leave it there to fester even more anger on both sides.”
Astarion stares at you, his expression impossible to read. Horrified but unrelenting of the mountain of unsaid words, you continue. “Just talk to me.”
Why, you want to ask. He knows you only did what you thought was best at the time, so what have you done to deserve such cruelty?
Why do you hate me so much?
He gives you a long, hard look. It was surely only a few split seconds, but it seems like hours as you don’t even dare to breathe, rooted in place as you await his answer. It’s infuriating that you can’t tell what he’s thinking even now. He’s always been far too good at masking his feelings, and while he’d used it against you once, you never thought he’d have to again. And finally, when he moves, he doesn’t move to speak.
He shuts his eyes, and when they open again, he’s grinning. That fake, beautiful grin that brings you so much anguish and conflict simultaneously that it makes the sides of your head pound with the beating of your heart. “Fine, darling. Let’s talk if you want to so badly.”
It's so artificial that it leaves a bad taste in your mouth.
You wish he’d just tell you he hates you again.
He’s blocking you out again. Again and again, no matter how many times you take a step forward, he takes a few back, and the distance between the two of you grows larger. It’s just so exhausting and repetitive. You’re sick of it. 
“Why do I hate you? Where should I start?” he hums. “Ah, perhaps when you took it upon yourself to be the one to stab a knife through Cazador’s heart. I’m rather curious myself, darling, how did it feel? Could you feel his screams through your dagger, or were you too occupied watching the life drain from his face? Was it hard to reach his heart? Did he struggle? Oh, do tell, I’d love to know how that bastard suffered.”
The words feel like a knife to your own chest.
“To think that could have been me if I hadn’t seduced you when we met…You could’ve pierced a stake through my heart when you first caught me longing for your blood. Can you believe it? If you’d just killed me then, you wouldn’t be standing here now. You wouldn’t have let me bed you in that dirty forest clearing, and you would have never felt my lips upon yours. I could have chosen anyone else---anyone in the camp---and we wouldn't be standing here, but Gods was it easy to seduce you."
He stops, and his next words make the blood drain from your face.
"Just like the thousand other victims I brought to Cazador. You're no different from them...all you want from me are my weaknesses. You kept me this way to keep me fragile, and pathetic."
Has listening to someone's voice always been so difficult?
“I didn't—”
“But I suppose you’re the victor in another sense, my dear,” he sneers, his face impossibly close to yours, but he’s never felt so far away. “You should count yourself lucky. Few can say they’ve managed to bed me and survive to tell the tale. You even managed to make me fall for you! You, a simple naive bard, managed to seduce me! And Gods, did you put up a glorious show, darling, betraying me like you did. It was an ingenious move on your part, preventing me from reaching my full potential—the hero of Baldur’s Gate wouldn’t want anything tainting their beloved city with blood, after all–”
No, this is all wrong. This does nothing but make things worse. You wish he'd just stop.
In the blink of an eye, Astarion stops speaking. With expecting eyes, his attention flickers to the knife now pointed at his pale throat. You practically gnaw on the inside of your cheek as you inch the knife just a few centimeters from breaking skin. “Shut up.”
Astarion’s glare narrows on your hand. “Enough talking for you?”
You see that whatever man you fell in love with in what feels like another lifetime was a mask. Deep down, you’ve known that the face he wears is nothing but a facade ever since this entire fiasco started and he’d situated himself into your home. Yet, the cruelty still hurts. It hurts how much he detests you with the very same face that once worshipped your very breath. Gods, you’d been so foolish, thinking a damn vampire spawn could feel anything other than hunger….much less love.
He’d likely prefer to eat out your heart than hold it in his cold, dead hands. He’d watch you with those sultry eyes as he sinks his teeth into what remains of your heart and feels nothing but his own thirst being satiated.
So you won’t give him the opportunity. You won’t give him your heart again, even as the sky falls and the ground dissipates.
You’ve done it once, and you’ve never regretted anything more.
“You’re turn, my dear,” he says. “If you wish to say something, feel free to do so.”
He steps closer, and the tip of your blade draws a small bead of blood. He doesn’t seem to care.
Red, red, red. Your vision is growing blurry.
You inhale sharply. Breathe. You can still breathe. Words that had been bottled up inside dissipate the longer you watch him, as you understand that no matter what you say or do, he will remain as he is. While you want to tell yourself it’s because time itself has ceased for him, you know he doesn’t want to change in the first place.
“I should kill once this is over,” you mutter calmly. His blood now falls down the side of your knife. “But I’m not like you. I’m not as pathetic or petty as you are, even though I’ve been through less than you probably have. I don’t attempt murder just because things don’t go my way.”
His smile twitches.
“If you like being alone so much, then I won’t stop you. Once this is all over, I never want to see you again. I don’t care what you do, but I just want you to disappear. I want you gone, forever, in whatever shadows you hide in during the day.”
It only seems like yesterday when you begged the moon to see him one last time.
Even though he’s speaking through his teeth, he nods as you bring your knife back to your side. “I’m glad we have something to agree on.”
You want to laugh, but you fear it’ll come out as cracked.
“And you’re right,” you wipe his blood off the dagger on your sleeve, not bothering to spare him a glance. “I should have let the others behead you when we met.”
If he wants to sabotage the little good left in his life, let him. If he wants to be miserable for the rest of his undying days over what’s already been done, let him. You don’t care anymore.
Amusement drips from his voice. “A shame.”
His finger tilts your chin upward, his thumb rubbing at the side of your cheek. It’s then that you realize there’s a whiff of blood coming from a wound on your skin—a result of the forest, you’d guess. You try to swat him away, but his thumb swipes the droplets of blood to the side of your face, staring down at you with eyes that resemble rubies. You’ve always loved them, describing them as the gems you’ve stumbled across in such dire times, but now all you want to do is look away. They’re too harsh. They’re too cold. They’re too him.
You swallow the lump in your throat as he licks your blood off the pad of his thumb.
“It would’ve been better if one of us died that day.”
He takes his time to respond. 
“I know.”
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avocado-writing · 2 months
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hiii your bg3 writing is so *chefs kiss*
I was hoping you'd be able to write the companions' reactions to a bard!tav, giving them a private serenade one night. like they lead them to a clearing away from camp one night and there's a picnic set up and tav sings a song they wrote specifically for their love?
if all the companions is too many, could you please specifically do Halsin, Astarion, Minthara and Wyll?
oh, cute! going to give you a lute, as I think that’s easiest!
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Astarion
he makes a comment about how he feels the picnic was a bit unnecessary as he can’t eat it, but you mention you’re his snack later ;)
you sit him down, pour him a glass of wine, and pull out your lute
you ask, suddenly uncharacteristically shy, if you can play him something.
he cocks his head to the side and nods.
your fingers dance across strings, and when you start to sing, he realises it’s a song about him.
you once offered to be his mirror, and tonight you repeat that. your song is about how lovely he is, in every way. how he’s handsome but kinder than he wants to admit. brave. fierce.
its the most sincere celebration of his character he’s ever heard, and by the end of it, he’s left shocked.
“oh…” “did you like it?” chewing your lip, nervous.
“it’s… you’re…” he really doesn’t have the words to convey how you’ve made him feel. so he gently takes your chin in his hand and kisses you.
the kiss gets deeper. the lute is abandoned. so, really, is the picnic. the music the two of you make then is of a different kind.
later, when he has time to come up with a suitable review, he will tell you how much it meant to him. you are his favourite musician, and he has a new favourite song.
Halsin
oh, he’s been around for a long time, but this is the first time someone’s done something like this for him.
he’s just sat in bowled-over silence as you play for him, and it is amazing. an epic ode to his life and kindness, how strong and handsome you think he is.
he comes closer as you sing, sitting right next to you. studying every inch of your face as you perform.
when you’re done, he tells you that it was the loveliest thing he’s ever heard.
“I’ve heard pods of whales singing as they meet up with their lost family… until now, it was the sweetest sound to have graced my ears.”
he gets you to repeat the song and turns into different animals to enjoy it, be it via vibrations or different ways of hearing. either way he wants to be surrounded by your music, and you.
Minthara
absolutely no idea how to respond.
she was brought up in a cutthroat world. this softness is new to her.
she remains quiet for a while as she tries to work out if you’re trying to get anything from her. is this a trick?
”oh, I’m sorry,” you say after a while when she’s just been staring. “did you not like it?”
”no. no, it was… play it again.”
you do, and she really listens to the lyrics. they’re about her beauty. how glad you are to have met her. her strength in battle and soul.
she’s exceptionally moved.
“this is… a priceless gift that you’ve given me. I have no way to repay you.” “I don’t need repayment. it was freely given.”
she kisses you, for she has no way else to thank you. you have moved her more than she thought possible.
Wyll
you play and he listens. his eyes and smile go wide.
absolutely enraptured. claps when you’re done, and cheers your performance. you laugh and bow for him.
he tells you how much you mean to him, what a sweet gift this is. how your love is his most treasured possession.
he reaches into his pocket… and takes out some paper.
“I… I know this is incredible timing but actually… I wrote you something, myself.”
and he starts to read out a poem.
oh, it is lovely. full of flowery verse, and sweet appreciations of you. all the little things which make him love you. you pick up your lute and play along eventually, and he gets into the rhythm too.
the two of you laugh at the fact that you both had the same idea! you’re so alike, so in sync.
he holds you tenderly, kisses you softly.
you end up writing many songs about your Blade. he is your perfect muse.
bonus:
Karlach bursts into tears when she hears it, and scoops you up into a big hug at the end. she’s so emotional. she can’t stop saying she loves you, she loves your song, all of it. lots of wet kisses for you.
Gale is rendered speechless for the first time he can remember. he just stares at you in adoration. he’s never had anyone love him enough to write a song about him before, and he full force of his affection for you hits him in that moment. he is smitten.
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effable-as-f · 1 month
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Ok I saw some post about how Gertie and Molman lashing out at Fabian and Riz respectively over something minor was hinting at something and I assumed at first it was just a bit that was being read into, but two is coincidence and three is a pattern and now I'm starting to think they're right, Quincy's outburst in bard class was INCREDIBLY fucking over the top (and also self destructive, like he destroyed an object he probably cared a lot about (his instrument) and bashed his head into a door)
And also the fact that he was specifically yelling about how everyone "worships" Fabian? Almost as if the true source of his rage was stemming from somewhere deeper, from something or someone who is angry that they are not the one being worshipped...?
There's a theme in this season about how stress mounts up into anger. Like, if you fail to keep up with all the pressure, you get stress tokens, get too many stress tokens, and you start getting rage tokens, and rage tokens mean you start to lash out at others and harm your relationships with the people that you care about. It's not only the Bad Kids who are under that kind of stress, it's the entire school.
By getting Arthur Aguefort, famously the loosey-gooseyest principal of all time, out of the way, and replacing him with a new principal who is going to crack down hard on the rules, getting other kids to do drugs to get them in trouble, killing a teacher and getting an entire class set to pass-fail (and now that Grix is gone even the faculty themselves are stressing the fuck out because they have no idea what they're supposed to do now), it's almost as if someone (or someones) is setting up the Aguefort Adventuring Academy to be the perfect spiritual battery to bring a god of rage back to life
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iamthedukeofurl · 4 months
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One interesting thing that can happen in long running media is that the general cultural background can shift under the work, recontextualizing it as it is being written. I'm specifically thinking of the Order of the Stick, a Dungeons and Dragons themed webcomic that started in 2003 with the titular party of adventurers going through a dungeon.
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From left to right, we have Belkar Bitterleaf the halfling ranger, Vaarsuvius the Elf Wizard, Elan the Human Bard, Haley Starshine the Human Rogue, Durkon Thundershield the Dwarf Cleric, and Roy Greenhilt the Human Fighter. The comic takes place in a fantasy setting that knowingly runs off the rules of Dungeons and Dragons third edition. Characters talk about rolls and bonuses and intentionally take levels in various classes. At the start, the comic was a pretty basic gag comic about the D&D rules, basic fantasy/adventure tropes, ect.
In the 20 years the comic has been running, it has updated about 1300 times, not counting bonus strips exclusively made for the printed version, and several print (or PDF) only side and prequel stories. It has also dramatically grown from it's roots, the art has improved while keeping the same general aesthetic, and the gag-a-day comic has become a sweeping fantasy epic. The characters have grown beyond their initial bits (Belkar is a Murderhobo, Elan is stupid, Haley is greedy, ect), and it's genuinely up there as one of my favorite stories. But anyway, let's talk about Vaarsuvius. If you look at the above art, You'll notice that the characters tend to have three types of body shapes: Rectangles for Roy, Belkar, and Elan, feminine curves for Haley, and Robes for Vaarsuvius. This presentation is a pretty consistent signifier of gender and/or somebody wearing robes. Early on, part of Vaarsuvius's running gag became their ambiguous gender. At the time, it was a fairly common joke in fantasy to talk about how Elven men had androgynous or "Girly" appearances, so V was part of that. Instead of a singular pronoun, characters would generally just abbreviate Vaarsuvius's name as "V", and whenever the narrative would have naturally provided some indication of gender one way or another, V would resolve the situation without providing any such indication. For example, an early gag has the characters seeking out a set of modern style bathrooms in the dungeon. When they find them, V says that their "More Efficient elven biology" means they don't have to go yet, so they wait outside while the boys go into the Men's room and Haley waits in the inevitable long line at the women's. When Vaarsuvius reveals that they are married, they use the term "Spouse" to refer to their partner, when we see their children, the children are clearly adopted (V and their partner both have pale skin, their children have darker skin) and refer to Vaarsuvius as "Parent". Vaarsuvius themselves seems to have trouble identifying other people by gender. Characters outside the central cast might refer to Vaarsuvius as "He" or "She", but doing so was always shedding light on that character's perspective, rather than saying anything about Vaarsuvius. The assumption behind the gag is that Vaarsuvius must be either male or female, and the joke is that the narrative/Vaarsuvius themselves keeps finding ways to avoid "Revealing" their gender. Fan wikis and official books list Vaarsuvius's gender as "Ambigious" and on the forum there used to be a regular, multi-part thread dedicated to debatings Vaarsuvius's gender, even after the author declared that it would "never be revealed".
Anyway, going back to the start, it's 2023, and something shifted at some point, both in the comic and in the general cultural background. The jokes about V's gender kind of fell off, not just because the gag got played out, but because the basic assumption behind it simply doesn't work anymore. Everybody knows that Nonbinary people exist. There's no point in the comic where Vaarsuvius switches from being "Ambigiously Gendered" to Nonbinary, in fact, the entire comic reads just fine if you read Vaarsuvius as male or female and just not caring enough to clarify their gender to anybody and at some point other characters just stop thinking about it. But it's interesting to see how a character trait that was once included in even the most basic character descriptions (Varsuvius: Elven Wizard. Arrogant, Intelligent. Ambigiously gendered) just kind of got washed away by a rising tide of cultural nuance towards gender. Also go read OOTS, it's pretty great.
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Do you think we could have the yandere twst dorm leaders with a reader(preferably fem) who’s like a witch from The Owl House?
Like, she can cast magic with her hands without worrying about blot, has pointy ears, and a Palisman staff she uses to fly around. Also her magic is pretty unique compared to the kinds in Twisted Wonderland, specifically Bard and Abomination magic.
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Owl House Reader | Yandere Twisted Wonderland 
You have the powers to manipulate elements with your paper runes. Traveling on your staff, you’ve bewitched those in Twisted Wonderland. Unfortunately for them you since your magic is so drastically different, they’ll have to think of other ways to subdue you:
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Riddle Rosehearts
“If you continue to resist me, with your abominations! I’ll have no choice but to take off their heads!” 
His special ability may or may not work on you
In the scenario that it does not 
He doesn’t mind using his own mastery of magic to take you on
He’s a prodigy after all 
if you won’t take his love now
You’ll take it after he defeats you 
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Idia Shroud
“W-w-w-witch?! By any chance do you have a delivery service?”
He’s not only interested in knowing how you’re magic works 
But in trying to keep you on lock down
The problem with you is that there is no legend about how detain you
So he’ll have to information gather
Cameras, recorders galore
He’s watching and listening in so that soon he’ll know everything
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Kalim Al Asim
“Wow you can do so well!”
He knows your talented 
And he wants nothing more than watching you as you use your magic
Surely everyone must think the same right 
But if you come to him about anyone who’s giving you trouble
Jamil can handle it he knows what to do
So you can keep smiling along with him
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see-arcane · 1 year
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Lucy and Jonathan
“We met some time ago a man that would just do for you, if you were not already engaged to Jonathan.”
I’ll admit, while it probably wasn’t anything more than an airy throw-in without any real barbs behind it, the inflection on Lucy’s comment followed by the idle advertisement of upcoming character, Dr. John ‘Jack’ Seward, as a higher-up-the-ladder ‘what-if’ prospect, still kind of stung to hear. I know it’ll get sanded back in later chapters because—minor spoilers—context clues will show that Mina, Lucy, and Jonathan have known/been friendly with each other since they were kids, and comments from future letters will show a more mutual regard. So it makes me wonder what the reason for the implied derision was.*
*(Beyond her possibly trying to push Jack in a way that says ‘Nope, No, I Choose Not to See the Crush, No Thank You, Hot Potato.’)
My guess? It’s a bit.
Specifically, a holdover from hers, Mina’s, and Jonathan’s earlier days when all of them had grown into adolescence, social mores started getting hammered in in earnest, and Mina and Jonathan were just starting on their official courtship.
Suddenly, they’re no longer a trio of kids enjoying each other’s company. Now it’s two young ladies—one rich, one poor—and a charming young man—also from a lower class. Considering the period, it would be only too easy for whispers to start flying behind fans and cigars that the young Mr. Harker might consider leveling up his prospects, or that the lovely Miss Westenra, a veritable Victorian Helen of Troy, might idly snatch her low-born friend’s man out from under her nose on a whim. And aren’t they such a pretty picture? Quoting their Shakespeare at each other, so intriguingly close compared to most men and their ladies’ friends…unless there are certain extra friendly circumstances involved, ha ha.
A ribald comment too many from coworkers at Hawkins’ firm and a backhanded compliment or three at the latest spring ball probably shocked Jonathan and Lucy respectively into action. Bonus points if one of the inciting remarks came from some tittering debutante, “Well, I can’t say I’m surprised. You two are so alike! Such sweet bonny things, parroting the Bard at each other, prattling merrily about the latest little outing without stopping for breath. Really, Lucy, he would just do for you.”**
**(Some have wondered if Lucy was nudging Jack toward Mina due to certain similar traits they shared. Some morose aspects, intensely focused, interests in modern technology. You’ll see when you meet him. Either way, it’s another parallel to ponder here.)
Cue Mina having to endure her loved ones defending her honor from being dubbed a victim of romantic betrayal in the most vaudeville manner possible. Though she should expect no less from Theatre Nerds 1 and 2.
When they go out, Mina is permanently sandwiched between them as if they’re ducking behind a red-faced shield. Lucy brandishes a parasol to ensure they’re at least the shaft’s length apart; sometimes she’ll even open it to make sure they’re not swayed by looking upon each other, may Heaven forbid such scandalous temptation! Jonathan sits on the bench with them with his hat pulled down over his eyes for safety’s sake. At least a quarter of an hour at the start of each outing is dedicated to a back-and-forth of:
Lucy, nose up so high she’s looking more at the ceiling than him: Mr. Harker.
Jonathan, checking his pocket watch to see how long he must endure this most arduous company: Miss Westenra.
Mina, head in her hands: It’s been months.
Lucy, scoffing: Months of torment in his presence.
Jonathan, scoffing harder: Agony in hers.
Lucy, on a fainting couch: However can you stand him, Mina?
Mina, about to pull her hair out of its pins: You helped him pick out the ring, Lucy.
Jonathan, picture of woe: Tormentedly, of course.
Lucy, nodding: Agonizingly.
In short, Jonathan 🤝 Lucy:
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