brought to you by all the things people have literally said to me in 100% earnest

The most bizarre part of ace "discourse", then and now, is how so much of it was based on non-ace people pulling their own definitions of asexuality out of thin air, and deciding, when asexual people told them the real definition, that the one they made up is the "real" one and asexuals were changing it to confuse them or out of spite or something

I don't know, if I cobbled together a makeshift definition of a unfamiliar term in a couple seconds and later learned there was more nuance to it, I may accept that the thing I made up when I didn't know anything wasn't exactly right, not dig in my heels and shout demands that all those real ass people admit they're the thing I made up or be proven frauds

Anyone who claims 'no one cares if asexuals dont wanna have sex' i dare them to say that next time they are in a social gathering.

Like just next time they're at a bar or something with the squad and they start talking about people they're into or whatever just say "i dont want to have sex/I never want to have sex again/I've never had sex and never want to" and stick to that and if they ask why just keep saying "because I just dont want to" and experience the super invasive questions and incessant heckling and people telling you you're weird, a freak, or should see a doctor because clearly you have a medical issue

Yes, people DO care about asexuals not having sex. To a creepy amount honestly

If you can't bring yourself to say one (1) positive thing about sex or romance repulsed aspecs without immediately pivoting to assuring sex and romance favorable aspecs that they're So Valid and making it about them or lecturing sex and romance repulsed people about our "responsibility" to "work hard" to avoid "becoming sex/romance negative" because we're "more susceptible to it" then how about you just shut up and not subject us to your fake allyship in the first place?

literally JUST had to see with my own eyes someone say Moon isn't aroace, and that "i don't swing any way" line is a joke. So...let me get this straight. Moon saying he's questioning in an episode, like what once or twice? Is somehow god's law now and means he is no longer aroace, even though HE DID NOT SAY HE WASN'T AROACE ANYMORE. But...him saying "I don't swing any way" is a joke???? This is some hardcore aphobia I don't give a damn what y'all say to defend yourselves and pretend to not be aphobic. This is back-breaking leaps in logic. Cherry picking things Moon says to fit your opinion, to justify your stripping him of HIS OWN LABEL is both stupid as all hell and incredibly, completely, totally, and factually effing APHOBIC. Stop. It. The day Moon actually SAYS "Hey I'm not aroace anymore" then you can celebrate your aphobic little hearts out. Until then, he is still canonically aroace! Why do you lowkey hate his identity this much??? If it quacks like a duck...

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all power to the barbie movie's PR team or some such, but I strongly dislike it when a fictional character is called asexual because they "don't have reproductive organs" or "the biology for sex" or a sex drive or whatever. asexual because they're a doll or a robot or an alien or otherwise inhuman. maybe as a trans person I'm just sensitive to the bioessentialism, but I promise you that not only do many real-life asexuals have perfectly functioning reproductory and endocrine systems and still neither experience sexual attraction nor want to fuck, but there are also PLENTY of people who don't have "the equipment" or who otherwise have low sex drives who absolutely manage to be horny as hell. allo paraplegics make it work. and even if they didn't, or couldn't, a lack of sex organs or hormones is not the sole defining feature of one's orientation. there are kinky aces, aces who get horny without wanting anyone in particular, as well as allos who want to get it up but can't. their biology doesn't define their attraction or desire or orientation or identity.

not to say there aren't people whose orientations don't change over time, of course, or who attribute their orientation to a specific cause (e.g. physical or psychological trauma, meds, surgery). but to imply that one's biology must result in one's orientation (and the attendant implication that if one's biology could be changed it could Fix Your Queerness), is something I'm strongly, strongly at odds with. It's a weird intersection of anti-queerness and disregard for disabled experiences, imo.

anyway this is all to say that if you think a robot or doll or an asexually-reproducing alien character COULDN'T be horny, you're an idiot with no imagination who's not even managing to respect asexuality with it. i can think of a hundred ways to be horny without genitals, easy as breathing, I'm a certified robotfucker, get on my level. nonhumanity doesn't mean asexual, because sex isn't what makes us human. asexuality as an orientation isn't merely biology, neither is sex for that matter, and respecting the ace robots who DON'T want to fuck means respecting the robots who DO.

:33 < if someone whos aroace tells you they like someone and asks you to call them a (insert any form of teritary attraction) do it. youdont get to pick the name you call them. youdont get to call them a "crush". that isnt your choice. just tell me youre aphobic/see forms of teritary attraction as "lesser" or "not real" without telling me

what you described isn’t a community, it’s a list of fandom behaviors and memes

wild how the lgbt community can survive hate crimes and legislation and the aids crisis and the death of so many community members

but your fandom got destroyed by people pointing out cisgender, straight aces have privilege over lgbt people and need to create their own spaces

pathetic

i made a very short untagged post about being sad that younger members of my community don't even know our symbols anymore and almost immediately got this. fucking amazing. just a few days before the start of aromantic awareness week too! never change, tumblr.

Something I want to add to that last aroace post, ye Alastor was confirmed to be aroace DIRECTLY by his voice actor, so the fandom just doesn't care about it and it's just so sad

The day that people see a completely proud and happy aroace/aro/ace character they'll cry XD

they WHAT?????

that literally. Sucks wtf huh. I'm getting him out of that show immediately I don't even care abt it I just don't think these ppl don't deserve him

Imagine saying narcissism is your sexuality with a straight (emphasis) face. "Please respect my desire to use you emotionally and physically and then peace out when you have needs because doing for others is ugh." 🤡

I was gonna answer all my asks later but then I saw this one and I'm like rolling on the floor laughing so I would like to publish this ask so we can all point and laugh together

I kinda have some thoughts on this one like I have things to say but like. currently I cannot be bothered and if you have at least half a braincell you already know everything I want to say (mainly that anon is um. let's say questionable.)

so yeah this is the most ridiculous combination of words I've seen in a while (especially with the context that this is most likely the result of me saying aromantic people are queer. like that's what this ask is about. that's what prompted this.)

Aro culture is thinking that, "it's been 9 years, and I hear that the aspec decimation has long passed," and getting on tumblr and creating a fandom blog just to get aphobia basically as soon as I talk about an aro headcanon. 🙃 aro culture is wishing a very much Stop Breathing on aphobes. 😊

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why was everyone posting abt ace discourse a few hours ago It is 2023 . that is a 2018 discourse. why do you still care. like i have my opinions on it but its literally pointless to discuss bc no one in real life gives a fuck

it’s really frustrating to realize just how many people are still aphobic, it’s just not the hot topic issue anymore so it goes untalked about. i can’t believe that with my own eyes i saw somebody say today that we’re making up things to be upset about like honestly

Marriage equality means different things for different people. We can't just say there is equal marriage just because there's gay marriage. Marriage without sex or children or intention to have children can be annulled in many places and US wise extreme conservatives think sex without marriage will weaken marriage as a concept/isn't possible because sex holds together relationships and will topple society or something.

Aros and people who don't want to get married have to survive without the of tax and other government benefits from marriage that married people get to reap from. This makes everything much more difficult especially if one is living alone and having to shoulder the cost of living all by themselves. Apparently living with someone else for what will likely be for the rest of your life (whether this be a roomate or family member) isn't "good enough" to get benefits equivalent to those high and mighty marriage ones.

Marrige for many disabled folks is impossible without losing their social security and other benefits.

Yes, celebrate that gay marriage is legal (US anyway) and gradually becoming more accepted. But also realize there is so much more progress to be made to get true marriage equality, and that it looks different for different people.

Annual Aro Week reminder that aromantic autistic people are the coolest and our existence is not in any way wrong, ableist, infantilizing, or stereotypical.

Getting sent a dm by a random throwaway account with a screenshot of comments from a solarmoon animatic. Copying the comments as shown but not blasting the commenters' usernames:

Username1: isn't Moon AroAce though?

Username2: @ Username1 He's questioning so isall good!

Username3: @ Username2 Fr? Finally! Glad they changed that about him

Username2: @ Username3 YEP

Reading that made me want to put a water gun in my mouth. I wish the show writers never made Moon a repulsed AroAce, so that me and my other repulsed AroAce peers didn't get attached to him and celebrated having a rep, only for the writers to then erase his orientation for a new character arc and a ship. It seems like an asshole thing for them to do but I digress, less I want to receive more aphobic messages and death threats from non-aspecs, alloaces and aroallos than I already have these past two weeks.

The next time this show introduces another repulsed AroAce character, which I highly doubt they would but IF they do, I won't get my hopes up. I won't get attached to that character or consider them a rep, knowing the writers will likely kill that character or change their orientation along the way.

Can anyone name a repulsed AroAce character in a show or movie? Not an alloace or aroallo. A romance and sex repulsed AroAce character.

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