#and to this day I'm still trying to figure out the hows and whys
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Building Each Other Up Pt. 4
Read Pt. 1 here, Pt. 2 here, and Pt. 3 here.
Mark's POV:
As I stood on stage, spotlight shining down on me, I couldn't help but feel exhilarated. The months of grueling training had paid off, and I had just won the bodybuilding competition. The crowd clapped for me as I raised my trophy high, a triumphant grin spreading across my face. I guess Shane was worried for nothing – but I’m definitely not complaining.
After the competition, amidst the congratulatory hugs and handshakes from fellow competitors, I spotted Ali in the crowd, taking a picture of me, a proud smile on his face. Making my way over to him, I wrapped him in a tight embrace before leaning in to kiss him.
"Thanks for coming, babe," I said.
"Of course, I wouldn't miss it," Ali replied.
As we pulled apart, Ali's eyes sparkled with curiosity. "I can't help but wonder what it would be like to be in a competition," he admitted, a hint of longing in his voice.
I studied Ali's physique, admiring the toned muscles beneath his shirt. "You know, you're certainly ripped," I said, running a hand over his arm. "But I understand what you mean, this is definitely different.”
Then, a mischievous grin spread across my face as an idea formed in my mind. "Well, why don't you try my body on for size?" I suggested.
Ali shot me a confused but intrigued look. "What do you mean?" he asked.
I explained how “my trainer Mark” and I had discovered the ability to swap bodies back when I had first started training. "It could be a fun experiment," I added, a playful smirk tugging at the corners of my lips.
Ali's hesitation melted away as excitement replaced his initial skepticism. "Alright, let's do it," he agreed, a grin spreading across his face.
Grabbing the reserve potion I kept in my bag (yeah I lied when I told Shane there wasn’t any left), Ali and I found an empty part of the center's changing area to do the swap. I figured I’d let him enjoy my victory a bit too. He quickly took off his shirt and flexed for me, giving me a better entry point.
Pushing into him, I felt a familiar rush just like so many times before. Once inside, I called out for Ali, but there was no response. He must've fallen into his subconscious. But I realized there was someone else in here too.
“Shane?” I said in disbelief "How long have you been in here?"
"I've been trapped in here a few days," Shane replied, his voice filled with resignation. “I cant seem to move or turn off my subconscious like usual, I must’ve screwed up the potion.”
Shit, I thought to myself. I've been absolutely railing the fuck out of Ali the past few days, and he’s been awake for it all.
"How did you enjoy getting dicked down by yourself?" I asked a bit nervously.
"It could be worse," Shane replied, his tone nonchalant. "But I'm still straight, and I don't wanna keep doing that."
Damn, I thought. Well, okay, not a problem. And with a mental push, I sent him back over the mental cliff, watching as he fell back out, still in my body. Awesome, I thought to myself.
"Why didn't you give me my body back?" Shane protested, his voice filled with frustration. "You're not even using it anymore."
"I need it for something more important," I laughed. "And based on what you just said, you probably wouldn't be down for it."
Before Shane could protest or follow, I quickly got dressed, left the changing area, got into my – or Ali’s - car and drove away.
---
Driving down the road, I ran my hands across his arms and abs. Damn, this body was fit—not as huge as mine, but just as firm and even smoother skin. As I drove up to Ali’s apartment, Ali, was just now mentally waking up.
"What's going on?" he thought, clearly disoriented.
"Don’t worry, babe, just taking us home," I replied mentally.
Once we got inside, I warned him that this might feel a little weird and told him to relax.
"Just let go and enjoy," I said soothingly.
With a push, I sent Ali over the mental cliff—his consent making the process even easier than with Shane earlier. The familiar rush of pleasure surged through me, the same wave I had ridden last time when I became the sole occupant of that body.
Ali, now in Shane’s body, fell on the ground and looked down at his borrowed physique, flexing his muscles and marveling at the transformation.
"How does it feel?" I asked, my voice laced with excitement.
"Unbelievable," Ali replied. "This body is incredible."
I grinned. "Well it looks fucking great on you."
“How's my body?" Ali asked, a playful glint in his eyes.
"Ali, you have no idea how fantastic your body feels. Well, maybe you actually do," I laughed.
Ali chuckled and then got up to admire his new physique in the mirror, flexing his bicep. I walked up behind him and started feeling all his muscles. This was different—feeling him from the outside. I mean, being in him was great, but this was something else entirely.
"It's been a long day—a long month—for you, babe, all that hard work in the competition," I joked with him. " Why don’t you relax and let me take care of you?" I started moving my hands down to play with the waistband of his briefs.
We shed our clothes and made our way to the bed. I started to get a bit dominant with him, pushing him down into the mattress and lifting his legs up.
He looked at me with a challenging grin. "Let's not forget who's who here." In a swift motion, he flipped over and pushed me down into the bed.
My stomach filled with butterflies. Even though I had been friends with Shane for years and then had possessed his body, I had never gotten to see him up close quite like this.
"It’s cheat day now. It’s finally time for me to eat some cake," he said, smirking.
Without hesitating, he lifted my legs and stuck his tongue in my eager hole. He devoured me with a hunger that sent shivers down my spine, making me writhe with pleasure. I couldn't hold back the sounds of pleasure escaping my lips, lost in the intensity of the moment.
"Fuck yeah, Ali," I moaned.
He stopped eating me out and slowly came up to my face, placing his hand on my neck, applying just enough pressure to assert his dominance. Nibbling on my ear, he whispered, his voice dripping with authority, "I think that you mean 'Fuck yeah, Shane.'"
Damn, I didn't know where this dominant streak was coming from. If anything, Ali was always willing to submit. But the way he took control now was definitely hot.
As he lined up his cock and pushed in, I felt every inch of him stretching me.
"Ahhh, shit, babe, you feel so good," he groaned. "I know you haven't taken one in a while, babe, but my body should be all ready to take this massive dick," he continued, his voice husky with desire.
He was right. My body readily accepted him. And since it was his body after all, he knew all the right spots to drive me absolutely wild. Honestly, I couldn't remember the last time I was this turned on. Even fucking Ali in Shane's body couldn't compare to the pleasure I was feeling now. I started to think, “what if this is how its supposed to be.”
As he pounded into me, I realized I knew a few tricks to drive him insane as well.
Reaching up, I gently played with his nipples, causing him to involuntarily thrust his hips even deeper.
"Damn, babe, it's almost like you know my body better than I do," he chuckled.
I could sense he was about to cum, and just then, I tightened my hole and wrapped my feet around his back, holding him in me.
He came with such force that I think he surprised himself, his cum flooding my insides. As he came down from his high, he smiled at me, his expression content. "Good boy," he said, while still buried inside me. "Good boy."
As he stroked my cock, that affirmation was enough to send me over the edge, and I came all over my chest.
He leaned down and took a nice big lick of my cum, his tongue swirling around the salty liquid. "You taste amazing," he said, his voice husky with desire, before kissing me passionately and wrapping me into the biggest spoon hug from behind.
Tracing my muscles and running his hand through my hair, he kept saying "Good boy, Ali" in a calming voice, until we both fell gently to sleep.
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Could you write a story with 90’s slash where he’s drunk and is being all lovey and touchy in front of the rest of the band? And the band is surprised seeing him like that? With like fluff but also smut?
A/n: There isn't a whole lot of fluff but it is there in parts, I'm sorry I really suck at writing fluff lol but I hope you enjoy it nonetheless <3
Warnings: Smut, Slash is drunk, oral(f receiving), fingering(f receiving), if you think I missed anything let me know otherwise enjoy!
You’d dropped by the studio with lunch, a regular routine you’d fallen into. It’s become so regular that the guys started chipping in and making requests, multiple stops at a time even. You didn’t mind if it meant getting out of the house and getting to spend time with your boyfriend, Slash.
This time, however, you walked in on a very different scene.
Slash was sitting in a chair, his guitar on the ground beside him and he couldn’t reach it. Instead of standing up to get it he just kept lazily reaching for it over and over again.
He had a bottle of Jack Daniels in his other hand, half empty and it was still cold. There were a few empty bottles on the floor around him.
Duff came over and took the bags of food from you. “He was like this when he got here.” He said, his voice quiet so Slash didn’t hear, not that it would really register with him.
You let out a heavy sigh and nodded. “Figured.” You chewed your cheek and went over to Slash, taking a seat on the armrest of the barcalounger he was on. You pulled his hair out of his face to get his attention. “Hey baby, what are you doing?” He looked over at you and it took a minute for him to register who you were but when he did the biggest smile came to his face.
“You’re here!” He gleamed, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you into his lap. “Missed you so much!” He said as he littered kisses all over your face, you couldn’t help but giggle, even though his breath reeked of alcohol.
“It’s only been a few hours?” You said, looking up at him with a raised brow.
“Oh, shut up, that’s too long!” He whined, a pout tugging at his lips. Slash always had been super pouty. You threw an arm around his neck and gave him a quick peck on the lips.
“The fuck is this?” Axl’s voice boomed, though he didn’t seem mad. You glanced around and noticed that all eyes were suddenly on you two.
“What do you mean?” It’s not like they didn’t know you two were in a relationship and it’s definitely not the first time you’ve been affectionate with Slash.
“Slash has feelings!” Steven exclaimed, a wide smile on his face.
“We’ve never seen him so...” Duff trailed. “Cuddly?” You shrugged and relaxed back into Slash who stared at you with nothing but fondness in his dazed eyes.
“Why don’t you stick around?” Axl asked. “Keep him in check so we can actually get work done.” You agreed and everyone got back to work.
Except for Slash.
He refused to let go of you for even a second, which made it much harder to play guitar. He zoned out and wouldn’t speak at all. All he did was nuzzle into you, kiss you and run his hands over you, crossing over more and more sensitive spots.
Slash drunk wasn’t your favourite, but him being so openly affectionate was sweet to you. You told yourself it was because he wanted to do it when he was sober but just didn’t have the courage to. It made sense since the main cause of his drinking and drugging was because he was introverted and it made it easier for him to exist with humans.
What started as innocent touches quickly turned sexual as he kept trying to get his hands under your waistband, constantly pulling and tugging at your clothes, kissing your neck and shamelessly grinding his crotch on your ass.
You tried to get him to stop but he wouldn’t, saying he just loved you so much and how he needed this, needed you. The band around you guys kept laughing at it which only spurred Slash on.
It crossed a line when you looked away and Slash lifted your top, revealing your chest on the one day you didn’t feel like putting on a bra.
You pulled your shirt back down and got off of him. “The fuck is wrong with you?” You scolded, glaring down at him. He looked right back up at you with nothing but desire. But he seemed confused, like he didn’t know what he did wrong.
Slash stood and wrapped his arms around your waist. “I just wanna love you.” He mumbled, words slurring together.
“Come on,” Axl teased, “just let him love you.” The rest of them were all giggling as well. You rolled your eyes and stormed off, angrily dragging Slash behind you, ignoring how he stumbled on his own feet to keep up with you.
Outside their studio space was a long hallway leading into many more hallways and a few more studios but among them were janitorial closets and other small rooms for little things scattered between. Perfect for you to push Slash into.
You locked the door behind you with the intent to scold him but he was already on his knees and tugging on your waistband again. “Slash, are you kidding me?”
“No.” He answered in a cheeky tone, big smile and giggling as he pulled your pants down. You should’ve stopped him but you didn’t want to. His touches bothered you in front of everyone but you couldn’t say no when he could make you feel so good.
Slash pulled your panties down and licked between your folds, licking up your slick before focusing on your clit. He couldn’t stop giggling which only sent vibrations straight through you. Your hands buried in his curls as your hips bucked to meet his lips, bordering riding his face. He didn’t even seem to notice, getting off on giving you pleasure.
You caught him palming himself through his leather pants so you kicked his hand away. “Only good boys get to cum.” You said, voice breathy as you continued to push his face into you. His hands gripped your thighs, needing to occupy them somehow so he wouldn’t touch himself he pushed one finger into you before adding another.
The small closet quickly filled with your moans and Slash’s muffled giggling along with lewd noises. You were sure that if anyone passed by they would hear but right now you didn’t care as your first high crashed down on you and you held Slash’s lips to your clit as you gushed on his face.
You pulled away and Slash’s body relaxed. He’d been holding himself up on his knees but he let himself hit the ground, now looking up at you like a proud puppy.
#guns n roses#guns n roses fanfic#guns n roses x reader#guns n roses smut#gnr#slash#slash gnr#guns n roses imagine#slash guns n roses#gnr fanfiction#gnr smut#gnr x reader#gnr fic#slash fic#slash fanfiction#slash smut#slash imagine
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Hi, sorry for the bad language and my inexperience with the app. I really like Damon and have a lot of questions.
1. If MC didn't work at a convenience store but was his co-worker at a flower shop, would he still flirt with her or would he have a different way of flirting with her?
2. What if the MC were the one to flirt and fell in love with him first ,will he be okay?
3.In the game I thought his dialogue was very good. It was as if he was a calm person. If the MC is a girlfriend who is impatient and talks badly sometimes Will he still love she? I'm afraid his heart will hurt when the MC gets irritated with him.
4.When he gets angry at the MC, what kind of expression does he show? So what should the MC do to make him stop being angry?
5. If the MC really loves making desserts Would he be okay if she let him eat dessert every day?
Hello 👋 and welcome to tumblr ^^ I've only figured out the basics here too, anything else confuses me and gives me anxiety 😂 so I feel your pain.
I would like to mention again that if English is not your native language, you are welcome to send questions in your language instead :)
Sure, I don't see why they wouldn't flirt. You can bet that Damon will go to work with you every day in this scenario. He will pick you up from home and accompany you home. His attachment/ clinginess will become very apparent here.
It doesn't really matter who falls in love first. He'll be more than okay with it :)
Thank you. I actually worry a lot about the dialogue I write and usually think it's very bad 😅 Good that not everyone thinks like me :D Damon will always love you, even if you were yelling at him. He doesn't like to be yelled at of course, but that won't stop him from loving you. He's very patient and understanding, and would always forgive you, even if you didn't apologize. He's too much of a doormat in that regard xD
You can actually see his angry expression in Day 1 when you choose to be dismissive of him. I encourage everyone to try all options if you haven't done that yet. I would say just apologize, give him a hug or kiss and tell him how much you love him. That's all it takes to make him stop being angry. He's a simple man when it comes to you :D
Of course. He would never say no to a dessert, especially not if it was made by you <3
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Even when Rapunzel figured everything out, Gothel is still using her usual manipulations.
"Why would you ask such a ridiculous question?"
Undermining Rapunzel and going in for a hug to show she still 'loves' her despite her stupid question.
But Rapunzel pushes her away, accusing her of everything. Gothel deflects, still playing the 'loving protective mother' role.
"Everything I did was to protect you."
But Rapunzel finally sees through her mask, and can't believe that Gothel's still trying to feed her the same bullshit she's given her for 18 years in order to control her. And she pushes her away again. She's done listening.
And it's here Gothel realizes she can't manipulate Rapunzel with her usual tactics anymore. But that doesn't mean she doesn't have another weapon up her sleeve.
"He won't be there for you."
So she brings up Eugene.
"What did you do to him?"
This time she doesn't bother denying that she's behind everything. But that's not the point. She brought up Eugene because she knows Rapunzel is going to ask about him. Then Gothel goes for the jugular.
"That criminal is to be hanged for his crimes."
She tells Rapunzel of Eugene's fate, and Gothel knows the news will devastate her. She thinks this is where she gets her control back. Eugene 'leaving' made Rapunzel run back to Gothel, and thinks his death will keep her in her grasp for good.
But even then that doesn't work either.
This is where Rapunzel completely breaks away from her. Only when Rapunzel denies Gothel her hair, her eternal youth, that Gothel finally puts down her mask. She doesn't need it anymore. She has another forceful way of controlling Rapunzel anyway.
("You say I'm the bad guy? So be it.")
(edit because i posted this in such a hurry and i still have more notes for this scene)
Just as Rapunzel sees the real Gothel, Gothel in turn finally sees the real Rapunzel. She's taken aback at her strength (i mean she knows Rapunzel pulls her entire weight up the tower several times a day but this is where she finally gets how strong she is as she tries to break free)
For years Gothel has a tight grip on her, now she is in Rapunzel's. The power dynamic has shifted, and Rapunzel uses this to tell Gothel straight to her face that she can't control her anymore. And Gothel sees this tiny girl finally stand up against her and sees what she's really capable of.
And bitch is terrified.
#i'm not done gushing about this movie and i'm making it everyone's problem#probably post another meta if im for it#tangled#disney tangled#disney#rapunzel#mother gothel#gothel
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Eternity and Counting
Pt.3
(Pt1, Pt2)
(I am SOOOOOO sorry I didn't post on Tuesday. Full honestly, I forgot. But today's chapter is a touch longer than usual as an apology. And by just a touch, I mean almost double the length of both previous chapters<3)
Obey me! X Angel!MC (They/Them Pronouns)
TW: Suicide, depression, self-deprecation, death, big feelings, lots of sad.
MC just can't handle anything anymore and takes their own life. Imagine their dismay to find even death isn't the end for them.Keep reading
~/\~
Since that day, my life, or afterlife I suppose, has been relatively simple. When I'm not resting in the garden, I'm running small errands for Michael. It's easy enough to avoid recognition here, but for the sake of my peace of mind, I wear a cloaking spell whenever I'm out. Simeon agreed not to tell anybody about my presence, and in exchange, he asked that I let him join me on my errands, even if he doesn't recognize me. He claims I could have any face in all three realms, and my presence would still bring him comfort. Sometimes he brings me updates on how the others are doing. Usually, he talks about Luke and his growth. He often avoids talking about the Devildom, and whether that's because he doesn't want to upset me or because he simply can't face them knowing what he knows, I've yet to figure out. It's a nice thought, him trying not to remind me of the best part of my life. But it's not overly helpful, given that, even if physical representations of our bonds weren't burned into my skin, everything I do reminds me of them anyway. I know it's selfish of me to make him keep my secret. But to be fair, I decided nearly a year ago that I am an inherently selfish creature, and I've come to terms with it.
Now that I'm on my own, things are easier. Nobody relies on me for much more than fetching papers or goods, and any failures that occur are mine to handle alone. It's simple. It's lonely. But it's simple. And it's good.
I suppose all good things must come to an end though. As I follow my long-since memorized path through the Celestial Palace, I can't help but wonder why I've been summoned. Usually, if Michael has a task for me, he simply brings it to me. But today he asked I meet him in the throne room, so here I am.
I'm greeted as soon as I swing open the door. "MC! Thank you for coming so quickly."
I'm nearly caught off guard by the use of my real name in public. For the sake of secrecy, Michael and Simeon have taken to calling me a fake name for the duration of my stay here.
"How can I help?" I nod as I close the door behind me. I take notice of Simeon's presence and he looks nervous. Never a good sign.
"I have some paperwork I need run to the Devildom. Usually I'd send Simeon, but I need him for another task today and this is rather urgent." Michael grins at me, likely in an attempt to sweeten the plan he's certain I would protest if given the chance.
I'm nearly nauseous at the idea of it. "You're joking, right? I mean this so genuinely, have you lost it?"
There's a flash of amusement on his face before he responds, "I would never make light of your trauma, no I am not joking. You have your cloaking spell, and all you need to do is hand the papers over to Barbatos. Maybe if he's busy, you'll have to hand them to Lord Diavolo himself. But then you can just come straight back. Simple and easy."
I stare at him, dead eyed and confused. "Yeah, seems super simple." I groan, sarcasm laced in every letter. "There's no getting out of this, is there?" I glance desperately at Simeon who seems to have loosened some of the tension in his spine at my pseudo acceptance of the whole ordeal. He shakes his head.
"Fine." I sigh. "Open'r up." with a lazy wave of my arm.
Michael nods, same fatherly grin plastered on his face as always. I'm sure he's convinced he's won some sort of mental battle, and maybe he has. Either way, he summons the portal, and I steal my nerves to step through. "I'm getting two days off when I get back." I call, lunging through the portal.
On the other side, I take a quick moment to make sure my cloaking spell hasn't warn off before looking around. I'm right where I had assumed I'd be. The courtyard's grand arches and elegant gazebo bring a chilly feeling of recognition to the back of my mind. How many gallas and celebrations had I spent out here, in search of some form of peace from the hustle and bustle? How many times had I stumbled upon Levi, or him upon me, in search of the same thing? I think for a moment that I wouldn't mind him stumbling upon me now.
I shake the thought from my mind as quickly as it occurs. Just deliver the paperwork.
I begin the path to the castle without a thought. The trail ingrained into my very psyche. I almost laugh at the thought. I abandoned this place, yet it never left me. What is it Djo said about men and cities?
I never allowed myself to dwell on it from the comfort of Michael's garden, but God did I miss the sky here. Something about the ever present swirling of purples and blues splashed across the stars is purely... divine. Not to say that the Celestial realm wasn't stunning. But there was always this sense of perfectionism, even in the natural landscape. It never felt right to me. Not like this at least. This has always been chaotic, but in the way a toddler helping in the kitchen is chaotic. Sure, shit's a mess and you're near certain it's going to end poorly, but if you take just a moment to watch it unfold, there's beauty in it.
I wish I could have been reborn as a demon.
No. No I don't. Living out the rest of my days, infinite as they may be, facing them with my own selfishness. I'm sure it would kill me a second time.
I'm utterly lost in thought and the view of the sky as I follow the path. So much so, I nearly miss the tail swishing on the ground in front of me. Luckily for me, it bats my ankle gently before I manage to step on it. Double luck, the contact doesn't wake it's sleeping owner.
Belphegor snores softly in the grass next to the path, curled up with his back to me. Something in me instinctively wants to curl up with him, but I know I can't. So instead, I sit. Divine garb be damned, I'm sitting on the dirt, watching him sleep. I consider making a run for it, but the subtle pull he's always had keeps me calm and still. Even in his sleep, even with our pact burned away, his presence still lulls me like a child.
I shake my head as if I were actually dozing off. Was I? Regardless, I stand up, settling to move him out of the trail, just a little. For the sake of the hazard he poses to himself and others. He's as warm as I remember as I press him further into the grass, tucking his tail over his leg before quickly stepping away and back to my task.
A warm feeling I can just barely remember washes over me and stops me in my tracks. How could I, after over a year away, fall so quickly back into routine. Not only how could I, but how dare I? I made my decision, and I've got no right to just wander in here and return to my position, doting and fawning over them. I truly am a selfish creature.
I tried to explain it to them, time and time again. But they simply refused to believe me. I cared so much, not because of them, but because I needed to. I needed to care for them to feel useful. Asmodeus once told me that I was a "pleasure sub". I told him I was willing to rip my own heart out to please him, but mostly because i never much cared for it anyway.
(As always, thank you soooo much for reading. If you'd like to be tagged in future uploads, please comment to be added to the list!)
-Your Friend, The Author
*tags*
@spffldlbrnf
#obey me shall we date#obey me x reader#obey me#mammon x reader#obey me angst#obey me belphegor#obey me leviathan#obey me mammon
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Argument ~ Brothers!Sturniolo triplets
Warnings: Arguments, rude comments, angst.
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Having four older brothers was sometimes a blessing but also a pain. They would all help you with school work and friendships, but also scare away anyone who got too close to you for their liking.
You lived with the triplets in LA. Being a year younger than them, it wasn't a massive age gap, but the boys made it their mission to keep a close eye on you at all times. You were their responsibility. They were protective over you.
You knew the guys were filming today, so you had planned to get dressed and head out for a walk. It was a nice day and you just wanted a stroll around the block as they filmed this week's car video. You picked just a t-shirt and some joggers, wanting to be comfortable with your stroll, you didn't think there would be a problem at all. Until you bumped into Chris accidently.
"Watch it, kid." He grumbled, almost spilling the Pepsi in his hand.
"Sorry." You apologised, wondering why Chris was moody.
He sighed as you started to the door. But his voice stopped you.
"Where are you going?" He called, as you stood at the top of the stairs.
"Just for a walk. I know your filming today so I was just going to take a stroll around the block." You answered.
"Without asking." He stated.
"Didn't realise I had to ask to take a simple walk." You said, the sass evident in your voice.
"Don't get sassy with me, kid. You know the rules." He replied, making you laugh.
"What rules! I'm going for a walk, Chris!" You shouted.
"Without asking!" He repeated.
"What is going on?" Matt called as he appeared along with Nick.
"Kid thinks she's the fucking boss here." Chris mumbled.
"I'm going for a walk while you all film." You said.
"Without asking!" Chris repeated once again.
"What's next I gotta ask to fucking go to the bathroom!" You shouted back.
"Woah, lose the attitude." Nick said.
"Yeah no need for that." Matt added.
"What about him!" You exclaimed, pointing at Chris.
"He's not wrong." Nick said.
"What?" You called in shock.
"I mean, if Chris didn't stop you and you just left, how would we know where you are or if something happened to you?" Matt asked, siding with his brothers.
"Your fucking joking." You scoffed.
"No, no we're not." Chris said.
"I'm not a baby! I'm nineteen! I can take care of myself!" You screamed.
"It's our job to keep you safe in LA. If your going to be such a brat just go back to Boston." Nick said coldly.
"You don't mean that." You said quietly, trying to hold back the tears.
"Mum and dad said we're to take care of you. But you think just because your here you can get away with anything. That's not how it works, kid. You gotta follow the rules." Matt responded.
"It's fucking daylight! I'm just going for a simple walk!" You shouted, the anger rising now.
"Go then! Go on your fucking walk! But don't fucking expect anything from us when you get back!" Chris shouted, heading down to the car to film.
You looked at Nick and Matt with tears in your eyes. You sighed and walked out the house, heading to the park that was close by. You sat under a large tree away from anyone and pulled your knees up, crying as you covered your face. You tried to think about why they got so angry. Were they stressed? Or were they just tired of you around?
Your mind wandered as your cries slowed down to a few tears and sniffles. You didn't notice the time until it seemed nobody was around. You checked your phone, seeing it had been over an hour since you had left.
You sat quietly, thinking of what to do. Should you go home? Would the guys still be angry? Should you call a friend? Or would they call your brothers? Or get a hotel? But you didn't have spare clothes.
So many more thoughts rattled through your head at once, that you didn't notice the three figures walking towards you. When you suddenly realised it was your brothers, your feet acted before your brain did. You shot up from your seated position, about to run, when Chris grabbed you, pulling you into a tight hug.
"I'm so fucking sorry! I....fuck. I don't know what came over me. I was just stressed and I know I shouldn't ever take it out on you. Fuck please, kid, I'm sorry." He rambled as he cried, holding you tightly.
"You....You hate me." You stuttered, as the heartbreaking sobs escaped your lips. The triplets all felt broken hearing you cry.
"No, no kid, no we don't. We're so sorry." Nick said, rubbing your back.
"Let's go home and talk about this." Matt suggested.
You nodded against Chris' chest. Not wanting to let go in case you tried to run again, Chris picked you up as you headed to the car. All of you got in as Matt drove home, the car was silent and you all soon arrived back.
When you went inside, the four of you sat on the sofa, nobody saying a word to start with. Your eyes stung with fresh tears, worried for more shouting.
"Hey...don't cry kid. We're so sorry. We just love you and as we said, it's our job to keep you safe. We've just been a bit stressed recently and know it's not fair to take it out on you. Fuck that was really wrong to do and we're going to try and manage better. We're so sorry." Nick said first.
"Do....Do you want me to go back to Boston?" You questioned.
"No, we love having you here!" Matt answered.
"It's my fault really. I'm sorry." Chris apologised again.
"As long as I'm not a burden, I'll stay around." You said.
"Fuck your far from a burden, please, we're sorry." Chris said again.
"I forgive you." You said, making your brothers smile and pulling you into a warm group hug. You knew they would be more careful from now on and you loved them too much to be angry.
#chris sturniolo x reader#matt sturniolo x reader#nick sturniolo x reader#nick sturniolo#nicolas sturniolo#matthew sturniolo#matt sturniolo#chris sturniolo#christopher sturniolo#xreader#sister!eader#sturniolo triplets#sturniolo triplets x reader#brothers!sturniolo triplets#au#arguements#fighting#angst#fluff#angst with a happy ending
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Things about eurovision incident that happened
While I was scrolling through TikTok, I came across an account that claims to work for EBU. They were explaining their point of view on what happened that day with Joost and why he was disqualified. I won't go into details here, but if someone is interested, I can provide the link.
Also, I'd like to mention that many people say Israel shouldn't be in Eurovision, which is true - they shouldn't be. However, they were allowed to participate in the end. I also see a lot of people saying that if Israel can join, then so can Russia as well. Additionally, some people say that Ukraine shouldn't be on this list because they aren't any different from what the Russians are doing. But here we are, I suppose. (no politics ofc lmao)
I also like to mention that not a single soul has ever mentioned why Bosnia and Herzegovina never joined the Eurovision Song Contest. To answer that briefly, they were disqualified. You might be wondering why, and the answer is because of wires. Yes, you heard that right - WIRES. The EBU considered it "too political" to put up wires that they thought were related to Srebrenica. As a side note, the song was literally about love, and I'm still trying to figure out how they came to that conclusion with that nonsense (never the less this is EBU after all)
It's funny how EBU says no politics yet they allowed Ukraine sing about Russian, not 1 time but 3 time every year almost, and they do nothing about it, also Serbia was once almost disqualified but EBU took their points cause they're song was about "male" makes no sense to me but I guess EBU is a whole new breed in my opinion
#eurovision#eurovison song contest#europa#joost klein#eurovision 2024#europapa#no rules#bosnia and herzegovina#euroviisut#justice for joost#stand with joost
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Well, we've finally reached it. The song that made me first start crying on my initial TTPD listen.
There's so much to this song, so much about how we use up and discard the women who make culture. Clara Bow is about the women who get held up as touchstones posthumously / very late into their careers. Swift has stated that she pulled from actual examples used about her, but I can think of so many more that could've been pulled in board rooms.
You look like Gwen Stefani, you look like Brittney Spears, you look like a Spice Girl. I can think of so, so many examples, beyond the ones who are listed in Clara Bow. We, as in the public consciousness, forget the women who shaped the imagery we love. Billie Holiday shaped jazz and pop, Anna May Wong as a pivotal film actress in Hollywood's earliest days, and Sister Rosetta Tharpe for rock and roll. For a very long time, any plus size woman trying to get into music was compared to Adele, and now it's Lizzo.
Young women, especially those in the media industry, are constantly, constantly inundated with women we are supposed to be like, but not entirely. We're supposed to be the better version of them, damned with faint praise. A line that has, in hindsight, stuck out to me was "You look like Stevie Nicks in '75, the hair and lips," because... Why '75?
Obviously, part of it is for the rhyme scheme. But the song is told entirely in quotes, something someone said. Swift looks like Stevie Nicks in '75, because she looks like Stevie when she was young, when she was "new," when she was dazzling.
That's not to say that Stevie Nicks isn't a powerhouse now. She still performs, still writes. She performed this year! In 2024! And yet, she will forever be frozen in '75, when she was with Fleetwood Mac and was releasing their self-titled album, in the throes of writing Rumorus. ( side note: please read the history of Rumours writing process. )
It's an endless cycle: women's ideas are taken, consumed by the public, and when only the bones remain, they're used to compare.
"Promise to be dazzling" is the ending line of the chorus - and it's both a beautiful, poignant reminder that the women listed in the song have captured audience's hearts and minds, and a threat. Promise us that you'll be dazzling, you'll forever be sixteen, forever hold up these ideals and stay the exact same.
I think Swift said it best herself, "There's this thing people say about celebrities, that they're frozen at the age they got famous." The demand is: promise to remain the newest thing, and we will always love you.
The truth is that, well, it's not possible. The promise is designed to not be kept. When public opinion turns on these women, it's to detract from their legacy of art.
Getting older is not a curse, it's a gift. We have so many public figures who didn't get that gift, who are frozen at 18, at 22, at 27. And yet, the societal demand is that women stay young, women can only be beautiful, can only be successful if they are young.
A couple of other songwriting notes.
"Did you know you'd be picked, like a rose?" Another question from imaginary men in meetings; did you know, you would be picked to be the new great thing? Did you know, that you too will begin to wilt under the pressure?
I love the repeats of "I'm not trying to exaggerate, but I think I might die if it happened to me / I might die if I made it." Because it relates back to that idea of how caustic fame is. How everyone around the Narrator (very much Swift, in this case) can see how she's being affected by it, and are indirectly praising her for being so strong. Neverminding that this entire album is a statement, a saying of "fame has drained me so, please let me off this pedestal."
But, didn't you know? "[You're] flesh and blood amongst war machines / You're the new god we're worshiping."
That final verse - You look like Taylor Swift, in this light, we're loving it. You've got edge, she never did. The future's bright, dazzling. Her delivery of the lines is soft, but the intent is clear. It doesn't actually matter who the imaginary board director is addressing - it doesn't matter which of the new generation of pop artists look, sound, act, are like Taylor Swift.
What matters, I think, is the warning. Don't let them do this to you. Do not let them tell you that youth is all you have, do not let them make you follow the mold of women before you, that you may only ever be bejeweled right now.
The future, too, is dazzling.
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I was talking to my dad yesterday about fallout new Vegas for around an hour straight, and mentioned I was planning on playing fallout four sometime, cause my copy of fallout sometimes gets a glitch for an hour that just resolves itself later, and he, while playing fallout four, basically BEGGED me not to play fallout four LMAO
it's so funny to me cause he bought me fo3, fnv, and fo4 and I started on nv and I'm apparently making him want to start nv again every time I ramble about it because he, quote, "would not be playing it [fo4] if there weren't mods"
probably still gonna try it eventually, but I doubt I'll love it as much as I love new Vegas (partly just cause I reallllyy love new vegas. also hi to my sister who followed me for some reason. why did you do that? now you just get sick of me talking about fnv in real life and online/lh)
but new vegas's level of detail is insane to me. all the little character interactions. like, a large majority of the groups/types of NPCs who aren't currently hostile have custom dialogue for when you aim your sights on them. I wouldve never thought that there'd be stuff for that. for scientific reasons, y'all should put a gun to y'all's companion's heads LMAOO. but there's seriously so much fucking detail. like, you can just absolutely fucking fail a stat check and still try to say it and you'll just say it like a fuckin loser. there's so much to explore, like the other day I found the mountainy area with the super mutants on accident. I saw there was an area on the map without any places id discovered, and I was like "y'know what? lemme go check that out." and when I saw TREES for the first time, I was absolutely thrilled. the storytelling in the locations is awesome (and occasionally very heartbreaking) too. gonna put this under a read more line cause it's spoilery for some lore, some of it is sad, and also this post is already long
for example, this is like a stupid one, but apparently the entire H & H tool company was FUCKING. if you read through the terminals, you not only get perhaps one of my favorite lines ever, which is
but you also see multiple people making emails that say something along the lines of "I told X I needed to do something. bring the moon rocks and dino head grabber ;)" (not an actual quote, but the objects are just as ridiculous)
AND THERES LIKE THREE OF EM AND THEY'RE ALL CHEATING ON THEIR WIVES/HUSBANDS WITH AN OFFICE AFFAIR PARTNER WHILE ALSO CHEATING ON THEIR OFFICE AFFAIR PARTNER.
this is probably the saddest/most disturbing one, but there's a vault that was overrun by spores that infected the residents, vault 22. I was finally getting somewhere, and I found a room with a key card in it. yay!
it was a bedroom. there was a baby carriage in the room. there were two spore carriers (essentially plant zombies) which I killed, then kept looking through the stuff in the room. there was a type of spore person I hadn't seen before that jumped out of me. it was called a runt. IT WAS THE FUCKING KID. after I killed it I just spent 7 minutes or so just staring at my screen cause. what the hell.
the empty houses are so haunting to me too. like all the different junk items strewn around tell a story if that makes sense. like, toy boxes, or houses with absolute loads of empty alcohol bottles in them. it's weirdly haunting.
nipton is also such a haunting location, obviously with the crucifixions and all. going into the houses and figuring out the legion bombed the fuckin bodies was so horrifying and interesting. according to my dad, they do stuff like that in real life in wars sometimes.
there's just SO MUCH STUFF idk how to put it all into words
play fallout new vegas guys
#fnv#fallout new vegas#hyperfixation#fallout#rambles#long post#under the 'read more' :#cw: death#war crimes#the fucking legion
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So now i am thinking of pony shockwave and the direction i would go with him
Shockwave as a pegasus, but you can't tell bc he always wears a lab coat covering his wings and he never flies. However he has also developed himself an artificial mechanical horn to perform questionable science magic, and the horn is part of some visor or helmet to give him the single optic look. And at Some Point he is forced to actually use his wings for something and everyone is like holy Fuck Shockwave is an alicorn ???? but he of course is not a real alicorn this is Science alicorn lookalike
Oooo he'd exactly do this
Giving him access to a universe with magic in it might be such a decision because in mlp? Magic has rules. Rules that aren't discussed very often, but rules nonetheless. He can logic them out enough to try and modify himself into a unicorn, then proceed to scare the shit out of everyone by actually flying.
I feel like a lot of ponies would have so many damn opinions about him being a pseudo-alicorn. So... so many opinions. There is so much symbolism around alicorns in their universe (in FiM, yes, but from what we've got Even More in mltfp.) and this would defy a lot of that symbolism. We don't see science mixing with magic very often in the series, but we see it sometimes. In FiM, the technology at the time just IS less advanced than it is in fifth gen, so that adds an extra layer to Shockwave having this level of proficiency at it (ohhh it would freak so many folks out. Because they've never seen anything like this.) He would look so freaky.
I'm wondering if there's a ☆story☆ around why Shockwave doesn't use his wings often, or if it's as simple as he doesn't want to.
#that'd be so fucked up it's great#like gen 5's technology is more like ours but even then it's different.#and to this day I'm still trying to figure out the hows and whys#it might be because they lost their magic at some point and thusly had to rely on technology instead#and the reason we see less modes of transportation is because they're straight up more isolated than in FiM#i haven't been keeping up with gen 5 much actually and i should do that at some point when i get my shit together more#meds realization aside this is amazing#Starscream will never look at him the same way ever again#Shockers would probably explain it... eventually...#tfp Shockwave#mltfp#au#maccadam#transformers#my little pony
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(Idk if someone asked this already) since we’re on the topic of gender
sci what is gender to you and how do you see it in you and how you express it in your art?? (Just a young queer artist who wants some light shined upon them 🥺)
i 'unno ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
#gender is soup#sci speaks#i'm so sorry i know you might hope for something profound but... i think when i'm put on the spot like this i can't say anything really#i think whatever i am is definitely pervasive in everything i write#but like.. gender means something different to wade than it does for peter.#just like it'll be different for everybody. we make different associations based on our experiences and our trauma.#like.. wade associates femininity with love. because of his mother. associates masculinity with violence. because of his father.#peter associates masculinity with responsibility. because of uncle ben. associates femininity with confidence. because of aunt may.#i think there's all kinds of reasons why we choose to present the way we do. and what gender means to us.#just like we'll associate a colour with something. or a smell with a memory. it's complicated.#i don't think i'm some kind of expert on gender things but... i just find it interesting to explore. the psychology of it.#i don't think it's supernatural. it doesn't come from nowhere. but it should be a playground.#i don't think anyone in this world should be restricted to a certain role to play. i want to try all the roles and see how it fits.#see how well i can play them.#maybe because i haven't found one that quite fits. so i want the opportunity to try whatever i can. see what feels right.#i think it would be fun to be a wife. i think it would be fun to be a husband. i think it would be fun to be a firefighter. i think it wo#shrugs. different outfits for every day. different roles to play.#today i'd like to try...#i think it's like kids learning how to be adults by playing pretend. by playing roles.#i'm learning more about myself and other people and fitting into the world by trying on different roles.#kids playing house. you be the mom. i'll be the dad. yadda yadda.#i still feel like a bit of a kid who hasn't figured out how to be an adult yet. so i'm still trying out roles to see what fits.
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my princess nonsense is being encouraged watch ouyt imabout to be eneaabled
OK WHATF ATHAT'S SO CUTE I HAD TO MAKE IT
i know realistically there's little to no chance that rei DOESN'T know how to work heels 🤣
BUT IMAGINE.....ING.... YAKUMO GENTLY GUIDING REI IN HEELS, WEEKS BEFORE THE BIG GALA
AND HAVING NONE OF HIS NORMAL FEAR OF PHYSICAL TOUCH BC HIS [TEACHER MODE] IS OVERRIDING HIS INSECURITY
#rei looking directly at the camera like why are you subjecting me to this. i do not need any of this. i know how to do it#rei wearing stilettos the size of your head so he becomes ur very tall bird goth gf#you know how yakumo gets when he instructs someone on how to cook something#he becomes confident and just tells ppl how to do stuff without his usual amount of stutter and secondguessing#i'm gonna pretend that after his stiletto training in misty vale he gains a TINY MOLECULE of confidence due to experience#like [i can help you if you've never done it before?]#honestly i can't imagine this scenario happening because i am so SURE that rei can walk in heels HAHAHA even tho nothing has proven that#SOMETHING COME PROVE ME WRONG SO MY DELUSIONS CAN SLIDE CLOSER TO POSSIBILITY#anyway even if rei didn't know how to wear heels#would he ever mention it? would yakumo ever learn of it?#rei would probably be all . i don't need to wear heels. they can't even see them under the dress. i'll wear my practical shoes#but if he can't get away with that and will be forced to wear heels at the party...#maybe he'll go [meh. i'll figure it out] and just not wear them until the day of the dance#at which point his feet will hurt after 20 minutes and for the whole night he takes any chance to sit down#rei can be frequently spotted on SOME surface SOMEWHERE in the palace. sitting all splayed out and uncaring of propriety#because he is in PAIN and these shoes are STUPID and why do people wear them for ANYTHING . Royals are so IMPRACTICAL#yakumo keeps trying to avoid heels for the dance because he doesn't want to be any taller than he already is#i bet there's a full convo about it between him and eiden#eiden trying to reassure him that if he wants to wear heels then he shouldn't let others' perception stop him from doing so#but if he genuinely doesn't want to wear them then that's ok too#eiden craning his neck up at yakumo in heels like you're my pretty princess 1-2 heads taller than me your height doesn't matter 🥰#i'm now torn. yakumo and rei both wearing heels now? in order to stay at similar heights?#or. rei starting out with heels. getting tired of them. going barefoot for the rest of the night lol#yakumo and rei still dancing in their ballgowns together but a much shorter rei leads a yakumo in heels#yes. yes this is the vision#yakurei#replies#nu carnival yakumo#nu carnival rei
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hello good morning happy thumb in his mouth tuesday (a day i just made up for matthias's slutty little whims)
#river dipping#theodore doe#matthias evanoff#echthroi#a burning house to live in#ts4#blender#now i just have to make a pose where theo's thumb is in matthias's mouth so everything goes full circle#you already know matthias is gonna be on his knees for it 😌#but anyway i finished making that first pose last night while recording a little video showing nene how i make poses#and then when i woke up i jumped back into blender to make another version of the pose but like. hornier.#i love making poses rn like i'm in blender so often these days... honestly i'm in blender more than i'm in the sims lmao#there's one i started working on like two days ago that is so... i wish i could share it on here but cock and balls are out in it </3#placing so many curses on tumblr hq#...........i did make a pillowfort account tho so :)#i'll post the wip of it onto there when i get further along bc the pose is kind of messy atm. still trying to figure out the anatomy 😁🔫#i actually made a pillowfort yesterday just to post an old screenshot from the casual oc save that i found again and had a good laugh at#i've been messing around on there and i really like how you can set posts to being just for logged in users / followers / mutuals#and there's an 18+ label you can slap onto your posts too#like it's great!!! tumblr sucks so bad why don't we have those options on here... seriously#ALSO you can turn off reblogs on pillowfort any time you want and you can set it so that it DELETES ANYONE ELSE'S REBLOGS OF THE POST!!!#WHY is that not an option on this website like i hate it hereeeeeeeeee#but anyway pillowfort also seems to not have that many people on it so like. that's literally perfect for me and my avpd#i'll probably end up posting on there a lot#...... oh and#nsft#?? just in case i mean matthias does in fact have a handful in that second pose there so. for the blacklists ☝️
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I literally do not have anything smart to say here, this drawing literally only happened because my siblings were telling me I should post my brainrot doodles on here, and my anxiety-ridden ass couldn't do it, and decided the only solution was to spend days (read: the entire latter end of April) working on a proper drawing because "if I'm going to post anything on tumblr, it better be a full-ass drawing"
#little fire's art#dragon ball#kaioshin#db shin#grand supreme kai#north supreme kai#south supreme kai#west supreme kai#idk the proper tags#and I don't really care rn#I just want to get this posted so I can hide in the Void for a million years or so#anyway#normal db fan: MY FAV CHARACTER IS [insert super duper powerful character here]#meanwhile#me: *holds up Shin* blorbo...#but hey this drawing did make me make some big steps out of my comfort zone for art#so I guess my db brainrot is good for something??#also for the record I DID finish this a couple days ago#my anxiety just prevented me from posting it here until now#but technically it's still a contender for April's art piece for the end of the year art summary#I'M NOT GOING TO MISS TWO M0NTHS#Feb sucked bc my tablet said fuck you and I had to replace it#if anything looks wonky pose-wise just remember I don't use pose refs much#bc I hate myself#no really#I just about drove myself insane one night trying to figure out how to draw Shin's right arm#bc the angle is weird and idk why I did this to myself#shut the fuck up Fire
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with the year coming to a close, i hope that anyone who's reflecting about how the year went remembers to be kind and fair to themselves with how you evaluate the year as a whole.
i think there are definitely times when life throws things that are... Not So Great at you. whether if it's some external circumstance that surprised you, or maybe your mentality wasn't at it's best. i wish for anyone who's encountered those kinds of challenges to be able to triumph over them and be able to say that they got through it.
heck, it might still be a work in progress even though you've kept chipping away at it, and that's ok! the results will show themselves eventually as you work through it! and i hope that we can all remember to be patient with ourselves as we go through these processes (learning, healing, etc.), because damn, it can be frustrating when you feel like you're "not there yet."
knowing that life can be rough at times, i think it's unfair to yourself (and others) to discount and downplay any progress you've made this year- whether if it's something that you did for the first time, or maybe you came to a new understanding and insight that you didn't have in the previous year.
it's not to say that you should undermine the validity of your experience with hardship, but to take the time to remind yourself what makes life worth living. to recall what moments were the most satisfying to you- and use it to strengthen your resolve for the next year and beyond. no amount of hardship will ever take away from the fact that you deserve to have hope that things will get better.
i hope that looking back on the year, you don't leave out the things you cherish. that you can remember the good that came this year. whether if the small victories are things like meeting someone new, trying something out for the first time, or making some strides in a long-term project/obligation...!
i wish everyone a happy new year! may it be prosperous, and that your life can move in a direction that's close to what you want out of life. you're all going to do great! remember to congratulate yourself for what you did well! despite everything, you're still here, and that's wonderful. never forget that!
#lizzy speaks#hello everyone. i know that there are *checks calendar* still 20 days left of december and 2023#but i've had a lot of strong emotions and feelings i've had to sort through as i've been thinking about how 2023 went for me#so a lot of what i've written here comes from the perspective of someone in their early 20s#it's like... a crash and burn from when you were a teenager thinking that you know everything#and realizing how big the world is and how many responsibilities there are#all while a feeling of overwhelm looms over as you try to sift your way through the world and adjust your understanding of it#for me i've definitely had an underlying thought that 'you should have your shit together by now why aren't you there yet'#and it's! not motivating! at all! to think that way. and it's made me more than ever want to be a friend to myself. to extend a patient-#kind voice to myself that reminds me that others are also trying to navigate these feelings and to accept that i'm not going to have an-#instantaneous understanding of how one goes about adulthood. and neither will they. even if they look 'put together.'#like... these people have also undergone similar stresses and along the way figured out how to navigate through that space#and personally i've found peace in knowing that there are people who are older than me. trusting that they've dealt with these things too i#some shape or form and that them living... being here.. is proof that we shall be fine in the end and that we will move past what plagues-#our mind. there's definitely been some... anger i've had this year that. school didnt teach me these things or skills!! i was so mad lol#but hey if we are little guys who are living on planet earth for the first time we shouldn't condemn ourselves to an unrealistic standard-#of going through life and being able to instantly do everything 'correctly' and know how everything works#i'm still working on improving that patience... and also trying to put in the work to understand these things.#in the midst of a very tough week for me i was tempted to say that 'nothing happened this year it was not productive'#but then i was like. that's. objectively not true if you just look at other things. also theres worth in life outside of 'productivity'#...i think i passed 20 tags at this point. but like. my favorite thing about 2023 was meeting so many cool awesome people!#who would've known that funny lil squid game could bring so many connections and friendships i cherish!#thank you so much! for being a part of my life and changing me for the better! for giving me many fond memories!#and i'm very grateful to anyone who supported me and my art this year... for sticking around even though i wished i could do more#it means the world to me knowing that there's proof that i exist and have touched someone's life in a positive way! thank you! truly!#ANYWAY. happy early new year. i hope everyone can nourish a friend in their head that extends acceptance and patience to themselves#as we try and make sense of the world together. there will be things that we don't understand yet! but one day we will! and it'll be like#wow! look how far i came! i'm okay! i'm alive! yipee! thank you for reading this post i made to get my feelings out! have a nice day!
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.
#me the past few days:#“why am I so anxious and scatter brained? why are my sh habits coming back? I'm doing fine. My pain isnt even that bad rn.”#i thought at first i was dehydrated because I've been drinking less water but i realized today#im fucking exhausted#a storm ripped the roof off the hospital where I work last week#so needless to say work's been fucking weird AND busy#I've been churning out art like never before since figuring out AMM#I'm trying to get my life together and feeling a real drive and motivation to do that#I've never been so burnt out on things that I love before#i also realized I'm still mourning my grandmother#that was still less than a month ago and fuck it I'm sad#i need to rest but just dont know how rn#maybe I'll figure out after work#i hope i do
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