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spencstan · 3 years

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Six of Crows re-read

(i also did this for the shadow and bone trilogy so read that if you want to)

spoiler alert obiously

i'm SO EXCITED FOR THIS this is my comfort book (with crooked kingdom of course)

JOOST HI

oo fun fact this was my first grishaverse book and i read it with no context whatsoever except that the mc is an emo boy and morally grey

so IMAGINE my pure confusion when JOOST appeared

i was like ?????? weird take on morally grey character but ok

joost trying to figure out how to flirt with a girl is a mood

anyone wanna teach us how to???

i kinda wanna skip this part so i can see the crows..

but i won't don't worry

(won't I?

"I think Yuri may be quarantined"

aaaand?

so are we you are not special

i feel like it's very important for me to mention that i read this book in spanish first

and then i got into the fandom and i was like who the fuck is the wraith? i only know El Espectro

Heartender who??? ooo you mean Cardio

Tidemakers? nope, i only know Maremotores

for real i was so confused i had to re-read it in english (not that i mind tho)

say whatever you want about the spanish version but we have to agree that this design is pretty af

another one yay: "Retvenko was a Squaller" vs. "Retvenk era un Impulsor"

(should i also say that in my pfd english version the book is 294 pages long and in my pdf spanish version its 532????) (i think it's because in the english one the speces are way less like the lines are so close together wtf

i've decided that i'm bored so i'll be skiping this chapter

anya is super badass tho

skdgfalsdgfliaysvfascvhjl yesssssss inej

Kaz Brekker didn't need a reason.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

KAZ

INEJ

I MISSED THEM

omg now i can picture amita and freddy SDJGKASKGLASG THIS IS AMAZING

we interrupt our regularly scheduled program to watch the shadow and bone trailer once again to hear freddy's beautiful voice

ok moving on!

now hear me out i'm giving you all permission to make fun of kaz for this one: Dirtyhands = Manos Sucias

hello i am Kaz Manos Sucias. nice to meet you!

AAAAA

AAAAAAAAAA

JESPER FAHEY

JESPER LOVE HI

SJDGHFKAHSGDLAJSDFSJ,AHFLHDSGF

I MISSED HIM OMG

OMG NOW I CAN PICTURE HIM AS KIT

can you tell jesper is one of my favourite characters?

i really love the fact that kaz is pissed about the murder of that ambassador ONLY because he can´t figure out how it happen

he´s such a nerd

i can't believe one of the firts things we hear jesper say is threathen to kill someone by writing "forgive me" with bullets

AND HE CALLS HIS GUNS "BABIES" OMG

picture saying hi baby and wylan thinkin he's talking to him but actually jesper's talking to one of his guns

Jesper rolled his eyes. "It's about sending a message. What's the point of a dead guy with forg written on his chest?."

"Compromise," Kaz said. "I'm sorry does the trick and uses fewer bullets."

ooo thank god we have kaz to come up with creative solutions /j /s

honestly i love how they talk about kaz's cane like it's the scariest weapon ever (which it kind of is)

nothing will ever disappoint me more than finding out that in english their gang name is "the Dregs". like i don't even know for sure what that means

in spanish is "Los Indeseables" (the undesirables?) which sounds a lot more badass

no hate tho i like the dregs

but i was confused af bc i expected it to be sometihng like "the undesirables" or"the unwanted" or whatever

and it said "the dregs"

which in the translator means something like shit or something

anways moving on:

If he'd (kaz) ever been a little boy

i love how lowkey all the crows think he was just born exactly like he is now

imagine a baby kaz all dressed in black and threatening people

cute

"No mourners," Jesper said as he tossed his rifle to Rotty

"No funerals," the rest of the Dregs murmured in reply. Among them, it passed for "good luck".

YES

YESSS

i wonder what wylan's doing right now :))

i can't wait for the next book where he has a pov

the first time i read this book i literally looked at the title of every chapter to see if he ever got one (i was disappointed to say the least :((((

Besides, she was the Wraith - the only law that applied to her was gravity, and some days she defied that, too.

ma'am

marry me please

i'm gonna cry so hard once the show is out and we get to see inej omg

me simp

That Kaz had chosen Jesper to be one of his seconds was no surprise. Twitchy as Jepser was, with or without his revolvers, he was at his best in a fight, and she knew he'd do anything for Kaz.

idk why but i just love it every time kaz implies or shows that he cares or trusts jesper

it makes me soft

But every one of Inej's senses told her that was not how this was going to play out. Her father would have said the shadows were about their business tonight. Something bad was going to happen here.

underrated saying from Inej's father right there

"I'm a business man," he told her."No more, no less"

"You're a thief, Kaz."

"Isn't that what I just said?"

i see no lies here

not to be annoying but i hc jesper as adhd (i mean is pretty much as canon as wylan's dyslexia) so i'm gonna write here every time i see evidence :)

jesper with adhd part 1: impulsivity

Jesper snorted. "Stomach, spine. What's next, spleen?"

"Shut it" Oomen snarled. The rules of parley dictated that only the lieutenants could speak once negotiations had begun. Jesper mouthed "sorry" and elaboratedly pantomimed locking his lips shut.

he know he couldn't speak but couldn't stop himself from making a comment (i relate way too much to that lmao)

hoestly poor jesper he had to watch hid friend get shot and kaz do nothing about it

i would've been mad too

"I like it when men beg," she said. "But this isn't the time for it"

KAHGFAHLGSFGASFLGSAFS

this is one of the best quotes in the book by far

YASSS KAZ POV

Kaz could have tol Jesper that he knew he wasn't dirty, reminded him that he'd trusted him eough to make him his only real second in a fight that could have gone badly wrong tonight.

cute

but kaz is petty af

he didn't even have a reason not to tell jesper that!

i love that kaz knows inej is following him but doesn't say anything because he wants to wait until she's ready

i LOVE the scene where kaz in in the van eck mantion /srs

idk why but it's so good

And, of course, there was the mystery of Van Eck's son.

wonder what that could be!!! /s

He grinned at her (...)

"Hmm." she said noncommittally, pretending to examine one of her knives, determined to ignore that grin.

KANEJ YESS

HE'S BASICALLY SHOWERING IN FRONT OF HER OMG

this is so funny poor inej is getting flustered

"And I'll need Wylan waiting at the Crow Club tomorrow night."

YES WYLAN OMG

One minute he made her blush and the next he made her want to commit murder

happens to the best of us :/

"Please, my darling Inej. treasure of my heart won't you do me the honor of acquiring me a new hat?"

if kaz doesn't say this on the show we riot

agreed?

it's so amazing how nina found a way to use her powers to get money instead of having to like steal and murder like the rest in the gang

NINA'S POV YESSS HIII

nina and inej omg

their friendship is just perfect

POOR MATTHIAS HE HAS TO FIGHT THE WOLVES

i would straight up cry

Matthias was dreaming again. Dreaming of her

i'm gonna cry damn it

this is the enemies-to-lovers we all needed

jesper has adhd part 2:

"Jesper was supposed to wait until three bells." said the pale boy

"It is three bells, Kaz." replied a small girl (...)

"Since when is Jesper punctual?" the boy complained with a glance at his watch

the time blindness come one

(btw i love the fact that kaz plans around jesper's time blindness instead of like threatening him to be on time)

i really love how every one feels the need to take the time to say/think that the masks are ugly

its so unnecessary lmao

yessss inej is a badass that kills monster we stan

and matthias is lowkey impressed lmao

as he should

"Thank you, Jesper," said Nina

"You're very welcome, gorgeous. See, Kaz? That's how the civilised folk do"

THESE TWO OMG

JESPER IS THE LOML

INEJ OMG LOOK:

She stepped aside as if she's known he was coming, languidly hooking her heel behind his ankle. Matthias let out a loud grunt as he landed on the stones

(...) "Clumsy, this one," the bronze girl said impassively.

that's what happen when you underestimate her bitch

AAAAAAA

PEOPLE

TIME TO FREAK OUT

WYLAN IS HERE

AND HE'S DOODLING STOP IT'S SO CUTE

ok jesper has adhd part 3 i think:

"Just how crazy is he?" asked Jesper, fingers drumming on the pearl handles of his revolvers.

ok first of all: stimming

second of all: hyperactivity

i rest my case

ok 2 or 3 things here

"I believe you know Nina," Brekker continued. "The lovely girl freeing you is Inej. (...) and this is Wylan, the best demolitions expert in the Barrel"

"Raske is better," Inej said

The boy looked up, ruddy gold hair flopping in his eyes, and spoke for the first time. "He's not better. He's reckless"

"He knows his trade"

"So do I"

ok 1: kaz calling inej lovely omg kanej

2: YES WYLAN STANDING UP FOR HIMSELF

2.5: kaz calling him the best cute af

3: honestly why do people think wylan is like an innocent soft boy or whatever. he's in a room full of murderers and thieves and the first thing he does is correct them and stand up for himself

like i wish i could do that

i would be crying like a bitch

AAAAAAAA

"Meet Wylan Van Eck"

KHDSGFALSGFIASGFAL

HI WYLAN BABY

YESSS JESPER'S POV NOW

I'M SO HAPPY also look at this it's the first thing in his pov

Jesper stared at Wylan

do i sense some wesper?????

ok everyone is being so mean to him right now

they are aclling him useless and an idiot and other shit

poor boy honestly he had to deal with this + taking part of a heist he is definetly not ready for + he has to hide the fact that he can't write or read

it so distrubing that kaz is literally the nicest one to wylan right now

"See that? Hidden depths." (...)"He's good enough at demo, and he's got a fine hand for sketching, thanks to all those pricey tutors."

(...)

"There you have it," Kaz said to Jesper. "Marketable skills. Wylan is watching you, Helvar"

GET READY

ARE Y'ALL READY?

OK THEN:

"Scheming face," Jesper whispered to Inej.

She nodded. "Definetly."

THEIR FRIENDSHIP OMG

AND THIS QUOTE

I NEED IT ON THE SHOW THEY BETTER GIVE IT TO US

"Who's Mark" damn wylan (but pretty good comeback to jesper tho)

"What's the easiest way to steal a man's wallet?

"Knife to the throat?" asked Inej.

"Gun to the back?" said Jesper.

"Poison in his cup?" suggested Nina.

"You're all horrible," said Matthias.

tag yourself i'm jesper

KJSFGAL kaz just told wylan to tell him everything he know about his dad's company

and he said he doesn't know and kaz was like "and you never looked trough his documents????

AND THEN HE GOT SAD AND SAID HE HADN'T (and kaz believed him this is sad)

AND NOW JESPER CALLED HIIM USELESS

ok you know i love you jes but if you keep this up

idk i can't do anything you're a sharpshooter

but stiiiiiil

LMAO MATTHIAS ACTUALLY THOUGHT HE COULD BEAT KAZ

nice try

demjin

*insert spongebob voice* demjin

WE'RE GONNA TAKE A MOMENT NOW TO APPRECIATE INEJ GAHFA

BECAUSE KAZ DOESN'T

The heart is an arrow. It demands aim to land true.

*ugly crying*

Many boys will bring you flowers. But some day you'll meet a boy who will learn your favourite flower, your favourite song, your favourite sweet. And even if he is too poor to give you any of them, it won't matter because he will have taken the time to know you as no one else does. Only that boy earns your heart.

*uglier crying*

TANTE HELLEN IF YOU DON'T GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE

SOMEONE PLEASE STAB HER FOR ME

jesper has adhd part ?? (i have dyscalculia you can't expect me to remember the number):

That sound - the swift, shocking report of gunfire - called the scattered, irascible, permanently seeking part of his mind into focus like nothing else.

do i really need to explain this?

ok just in case.. an adhd brain doesn't actually have a deficit of attention(the name just sucks) it's problem with controling that attention. the brain is always looking for new sources of dopamine which is why it shifts its focus so much

i love that jes thinks of matthias as "tha giant"

like sir

have you seen yourself?

you're tall af

HE GOT SHOT

WHY DID I FORGET JESPER GETS SHOT IN THE LEG HERE

"Close your eyes!"

"You can't kiss me from down there, Wylan"

"Just do it!"

i love the energy BUT NOW IT'S NOT THE TIME JES

YESS WYLAN SHOW THEM THEY WERE WRONG CALLING YOU USELESS

inej just stabed some guy int the d

good for her!

KAZ YESSSS HI

AWWW SHE'S WORRIED HE DOESN'T HAVE HIS CANE

KANEJ FOR LIFE

oh no wylan got shot too???? (just barely but stilllll por baby)

my Wraith omggg

ok 3 things about this:

Without another word, he tipped Oomen into the sea.

"No!" Wylan shouted, leaning over the railing, his face pale, stunned eyes tracking Oomen in the waves. (...)

Jesper set his hand on Wylan's shoulder. "Let it go."

"It's not right-"

"Wylan," Jesper said, giving him a little shake."Maybe your tutors didn't cover this lesson, but you do not argue with a man covered in blook and a knife up his sleeve"

1. wesper yasssss

2. wylan just argued with a mant hat had just tacken the eye out of someone. he literally called him out for being an asshole. like damn wylan is brave af i love him

3. do you think seeing kaz trow the guy out of the boat reminded wylan of when the same thing happened to him???? this makes me sad

he's brave and a good person and i just-

"Man with a knife, remember?" he said over his shoulder.

"Man with a gun!" Jesper called after him

this had no right being so funny

AND THEN KAZ GAVE HIM THE MIDDLE FINGER STOP I CAN'T

nina is the biggest kanej shiper no one can tell me i'm wrong

unrelated but if jesper had gone to the Little Palace and had studied there with nina they 100% would've had a crush on Zoya and bonded over it

like you can't tell me those two bisexual disaster wouldn't be absolutely in love with Zoya

jesper has adhd part ??:

Jesper scrubbed the back of his neck, touched his hands to his gunds, returned to his neck. He always seemed to be in motions

hyperactivity right there

and restlessness

"Do you know the best way to find Grisha who don't want to be found?" (...)

"Seems to be if they don't want to be found, you should just let them be" (jesper says this)

this conversation must be so stressful to him omg

LMAO JESPER CUT MATTHIAS HAIR THIS IS SO FUNNY

AND HE SHAVED HIM

ok you all know i love all of them but they can be sooo stupid

like wylan wrote no names on the drawing and he's excuse is that he doesn't know fjerdan?

AND THAT'S NOT EVEN TRUE he literally said he learned school fjerdan which means he should know how to write it too (we know why he can't but the tohers don't)

and even then like the excuse doesn't make any sense. why would having the original name be usefull if no one can fucking read it????

the worst part tho? NO ONE QUESTIONED HIM

THEY WERE LIKE "yup makes sense" AND WENT ON WITH THEIR DAY

i wondered how they didn't figure wylan's secret sooner but now i now

it's because theya re idiots

"I'm just doing my job. Stop glaring at me"

wylan baby let's not make the gigant mad

Jesper knocked his head against the hull and cast his eyes heavenward. "Fine. But if Pekka Rollins kills us all, I'm going to get Wylan's ghost to teach my ghost how to play the flute just so that I can annoy the hell out of your ghost."

Brekker's lips quirked. "I'll just hire Matthias ghost to kick your ghost's ass."

"My ghost won't associate with your ghost," Matthias said primply, and then wondered if the sea air was rotting his brain.

i had to put this here i don't want to get murdered by the fandom

jesper, inej and nina have the BEST friendship

I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE JES AND INEJ TOGETHER ON NETFLIX

"I know some people don't understand, but Kaz told me ... he said it was my choice, that he wouldn't be the one to mark me again."

i love this because it happen when they had just met

he did it because he understands her trauma and he respects her not because he loves her (i doubt he did at the time)

Kaz had been impressed with the sketches. (...)

"Just learn to take a compliment. Kaz doesn't hand them out often."

I'M SO PROUD OF WYLAN

and yess kaz only compliments wylan (and inej but that's sarcastic so it doesn't count) because he's a proud dad

"And you don't belong here, either."

"I beg your pardon, merchiling?"

"We don't need a sharpshooter for Kaz's plan, so what's your job - other than stalking around making everyone angsty?"

He shrugged. "Kaz trusts me."

Wylan snorted and picked up his pen. "Sure about that?"

DAMN WYLAN DESTROYED HIM

also

"If you aren't born with every advantage, you learn to take your chances."

"I wasn't-" Wylan left off and set down his pen. (...)

aww cute neurodivergent boyfriends bonding

Wylan had turned back to his work, his disappointment obvious. For some reason, Jesper felt disappointed, too.

ajgflasjgfjagslfiuusgflgdfsgdflasdgfsd

wesper

aww jes checks on inej every morning and every night i love him

"Thank you for keeping me in this world when fate seemed determined to drag me to the next. I owe you a life debt."

Nina blushed deeply. "I was teasing, Inej"

LJFGALKGFALGA another cute friendship right there

(and i can see why people ship them romantically)

STOP INEJ AND JES ARE BONDING SO MUCH (page 127 so i can go back and read it lmao)

Van Eck writes to Wylan every week, and Wylan doesn't even open the letters

"They just said the same thing again and again: If you're reading this, the you know how much I wish to have you home. Or I pray that you read these words and think of all you've left behind."

should i kill him? anyone want to join me?

Inej bumped her shoulder against his."Then at least we're both the same kind of stupid." (...)

"You're too good for him, you know?"

"I know. So are you"

jes and her bonding over their stupid crush on a white boy

Because I've been looking for an excuse to talk to you for two days.

jfsfdajdhmgkfutdjrgsg ok i can't blame them for having a crush on him anymore

this chapter is full of kanej i love it

"What do you want, then"

You, Inej. You forever.

jksdgfoagsdfgsdgfklasgdflaghsldfgksdgfkahgsdfghjlkf

kaz's backstory makes me sad

"When we get our money, you can burn kruge to keep you warm," said Kaz. (...)

"I´m gonna pay someone to burn my kruge for me."

Kaz fell into step beside him. "Why don't you pay someone else to pay someone to burn your kruge for you? That's what big players do."

"You know what the really big bosses do? They pay someone to pay someone ...". Their voices trailed off as they tomped ahead, and Matthias and the others followed.

JES AND KAZ HAVE THE BEST CONVERSATIONS

i can't believe we get to see nina and matthias meet and their whole backstory in less than a month omg

"It's not natural for women to fight."

"It's not natural for someone to be as stupid as he is tall, and yet there you stand."

QUEEN

YOU TELL HIM

oh no the dead grisha

this part breaks my heart every time

"Do you have a different name for killing when you wear a uniform to do it?"

.....i'm just gonna leave this quote right here

anyways acab

stop nina tried to kill the survivor so they wouldn't suffer but she couldn't do it

and jesper did it for her without hesitation i wanna cry

and inej didn't want to do it either i want to hug them

"Because our crime is existing. Our crime is what we are"

..........

i'm gonna leave this here again

do with it what you will

"Don't mock what you don't understand."

"My mockery offends you? My people would welcome you laughter in place of this barbarity"

i- this conversation is so important

AAAAA JES AND WY ARE A GREAT TEAM I LOVE THEM

WYLAN TROWS BOMBS TOGIVE JESPER TIME TO GET READY TO SHOOT

INEJ AND KAZ ARE A GREAT TEAM TOO

THEY LITERALLY DID THE SCENE LIKE IN THE AVENGERS (but without the shield WHICH MAKES IT BETTER)

Jesper shouldered his rifle. "Wylan earned his keep."

Wylan gave a little jump at the sound of his name. "I did?"

YES BABY YOU DID GREAT

kaz getting self-conscious for his hair is pure comedy

but nina how can you say that have you see his hair on the show???? it's perfect

"Remeber our friend Mark?"

HELP I CAN'T

"Any other impossible feats you'd like us to accomplish?"

The bearest smile flikered over Kaz's lips. "I'll make you a list."

once again jesper and kaz being besties

unrelated but nikolai and jesper would love each other

the amount of sass they have between them it's unparalleled

"Mmm," Inej murmured, taking a sip from her mug. "Maybe you're just not enough."

DAMN

ma'am marry me please

kaz fainted damn poor boy

unrelated unce again but this is so much betetr than shadow and bone

like you can tell leigh improved so much

her characters are better and their arcs are better developed

the writing itself it's better

or maybe i'm just biased because i love soc so much but i think she definetly improved

INEJ IS TRYING TO GIVE HIM SPACE EVEN WHEN SHE'S TRAPPED AND LOCKED ON THE WAGON

I JUST - THEY KNOW EACH OTHER SO MUCH

Though he'd trusted her with his life countless times, it felt much more frightening to trust her with his shame.

Inej had once offered to teach him how to fall. "The trick is not getting knocked down," he'd told her with a laugh. "No, Kaz," she's said, "the trick is in getting back up"

inej is smart af

Kaz was usually unshakeable during a job, but now he was on edge, and Jesper didn't know why. Part of him wanted to ask, though he knew that was the stupid part, the hopeful farmboy who picked the worst possible person to care about, who searched for signs in things that he knew deep down meant nothing - when kaz chose him for a job, when Kaz played along with one of his jokes. He could have kicked himself. He's finally seen the infamous Kaz Brekker without a stich of clothing, and he'd been too worried about ending up on a pike to pay proper attention.

ok i got a couple of things to say about this part

first of all it makes me so sad that jes cares so much for someone who dosn't deserve him. because no hate to kaz but they would never work as a couple and kaz already treats him like shit most of the time

i think this part shows who a lot about who jesper really is. a boy that grew up having to hide parts of himself, who thinks he's worth nothing but it's smart and capable, who's loyal and brave and caring but doesn't even know it himself. he's someone who feels he doesn't deserve good things and thinks he's not good enough, and that's why he unds up in all the wrong places with the wrong people. he left uni bc he fell in with the gangs, because he didn't think he was smart enough or even prepared to be in studying in the university. jesper is constantly hiding behind a mask or running from things because he's scared of not being enough

an kaz is everything jes in a way wishes he could be. kaz is secure in himself (at least on the outside), he's stable, he's smart, he's "unshakeable". and most of all, he doesn't care about others (we know that's not true but that's how he presents himself)

and that's the thing that causes jesper all his problems. because he's insecure because he thinks he's not good enough for the poeple or things he cares about. and he's always trying to do what's best for his loved ones: he went to the ice court to pay his debt for his father, he follows kaz everywhere beacause he cares about him, he offered to read to wylan (knowing it wouldn't be easy for him to be still that long).

and yeah it often doesn't work out becuase he's messy and he has problems but he tries. and he hates that. he hates that he cares so much about people because at the end of the day, that's what makes him feel like he's not good enough

one more thing and i'm done i promise

unpopular opinion but i love that leigh made jesper have a crush on kaz. 1 beacuse it's refreshing to see someone not get otgether with his first crush. and 2 because i love that it shows that we sometimes get attached to people that are not good for us, but that we can learn to move on. jesper ended with wylan who respects him and values him, unlike kaz

ok i'm sorry that was probably all bs

oo one more thing, jesper definetly has rsd (rejection sensitive disphoria), which is something most poeple with adhd have

"My father used to take me everywhere with him"

this is so sad. bc they probably had a good relationship when he was little. and then they figured he coudln't read and now his father treats him like shit

it's even worse than if he haf been horrible from the beginning because wylan knows he can be a good father. and so he thinks it's his fault and he deserves to be treated like that. i hate van eck

"You're cuter when you're smart"

(...)

"Definitely cuter when you're smart"

wesper yesssss

i love them so much

ok but why do people think jesper is stupid. like the boy just made a bunch of criminals pass out by mixing some chemicals

and he was going to the university at like 15

AAAAND NOW THEY KNOW HE'S A FABRIKATOR

amazing plot twist

also:

Wylan coughed. Flirting with him might actually be more fun that annoying him, but it was a close call.

oooo come on jesper we all know you just love getitng him to blush

and you love him

who said that? definitely not me, nope

awwww jesper misses being around animals that's cute

imagine him coming home to wylan one day with a puppy because he just couldn't resist

cute

Better terrible truths than kind lies

just leaving here more of inej's wisdom

ok this may be a reach but jesper has adhd part ???

Yellow Protocol? Red Protocol? He couldn't remember which was which. (...)

"The alarm was Yellow Protocol, a sector disturbance."

Jesper pushed at his temples. "I don't remember what that means"

a bad working memory? sounds familiar

kaz loves puzzles

it's canon

"I love puzzles. Trickery is just my native tongue."

this part where wylan and jesper see the banner made with grisha's kefta kills me every time

I would have worn purple, Jesper thought, if I'd joined the Second Army. (...) He'd beenwilling, even eager to risk capture and execution as a thief and hired gun. Why was it worse to think about being hunted as a Grisha?

this makes me want to cry so much

another thing super sad: the fact that since his father is Kaelish and had some supersititons towards grisha, jesper grew up wondering if his own father was scared of him. he had to hide his powers and he was almost taught to be afraid of them

"Is it safe to leave them, you know-"

"Alive? I'm not big on killing unconscious men."

"We could wake them up"

WYLAN

damn the boy needs therapy

it's amazing how nothing went like they planned

not a single thing

PEOPLE GET READY

ARE YOU READY?

NEITHER AM I BUT WHO CARES

"What do you like?"

"Music. Numbers. Equations. They are not like words. They...they don't get mixed up."

ok dude the clues are right there he's basically saying it

"If only you could talk to girls in equations."

There was a long silence, and then, eyes trained on the notch they'd created in the link, Wylan said, "Just girls?"

Jesper restrained a grin. "No. Not just girls." It really was a shame they were all probably going to die tonight.

wylan really said a straight man?? couldn't be me

this is the definition of bi panic "jesper restrained a grin" bitch we saw that

btw i love the slow burn

like they hint something here but they don't actually start liking each other until much later and they don't get together until almost the end of ck

i also love that the fact that they both like guys is like out in the open now. bc i'm not a fan of when queer characters have a crush and there's the whole thing of "are they queer too or not?"

like they both know htey are queer. but they don't get together right away bc they have to start liking each other before. they don't get together bc they are the only queer mlm characters

matthias fake betrayal killed me

i tought it was real

I have been made to protect you. Only in death will I be kept fom this oath.

this is just-

also foreshadowing?

YAYY KUWEI HI

There was no part of him that was not broken, that had not healed wrong, and there was no part of him that was not stronger for having been broken.

She's laughed, and if he could have bottled the sound and got drunk on it every night, he would have. It terrified him.

if i ever have a s/o and they don't tell me this at least once i don't want it

He needed to tell her... what? That she was lovely and brave and better than anything he deserved. That he was twisted, crooked, wrong, but not so broken that he couldn't pull himslef together into some smeblance of a man for her

THIS

THIS IS LOVE RIGHT THERE

they are the only straight couple that matters

everyone else go home

Wylan had scratches all over his cheeks and neck. He was beaming. Inej grabbed his hands and sqeezed.

so cute omg

"You can explain why our illustrious Shu scientist looks like one of Wylan's school pals along the way"

KAZ

i mean it's true but you didn't have to say it

KAZ IS SMILING OMG

EVERYONE FREAK OUT WITH ME

HE'S "grinning like and idiot" STOP I LOVE HIM

"We are all someone's mosnter, Nina"

"I will have you without armour, Kaz Brekker. Or I will not have you at all"

this part breaks my heart and i love it

"Stay," she oanted. Tears leaked from her eyes. "Stay till the end"

"And after," he said. "And always."

i just- helnik is perfect

AWWW JESPER MISSES WYLAN

my daily dosis of wesper :)

ok but in like 2 pages jesper tought of wylan like 10 times bc he's sad wy isn't with him

Jesper scanned the empty deck. He's assumed Wylan would come up to see them off. (...)

Jesper knew he was being selfish and stupid, but some petty part of him wondered if Wylan had deliberately kept away from him on the journey back. Maybe now that the job was complete and he was on his way to his share of the haul, Wylan was done slumming with criminals.

*charles boyle's insinuating voice* and why do you care so much???

btw YOU ARE WRONG. HE'S LITERALLY GOING OUT OF HIS WAY TO BE WITH YOU EVEN THOUGH HE CAN'T SPEAK

this scene where we find out the truth about wylan hurts so much but it's one of my favourites idk why

I LOVE THAT EVERYONE IS AS MAD AS I AM ABOUT THE LETTERS NOW

"Your're a fool," Jesper snarled. "He smarter than most of us put together, and he deserves a better father than you."

YES TELL HIM

the fact that wylan just heard him say that omg

"Deserved" amended Van Eck. He blew the whislte twice.

SOMEONE BETTER GRAB ME BEFORE I KILL HIM MYSLEF

THAT IDIOT

I HATE HIM SO MUCH

I'M GONNA CRY CAN SOMEONE KILL HIM FOR ME

Jesper screamed in rage and raised his guns.

YES EXACLTY WHAT I MEANT

JUST KILL HIM RIGHT NOW

"I'm not big on bludding, am I Inej?"

"Not as a rule"

Van Eck's lip curled. "And why is that?"

"Because he'd rather cheat," said the boy who was not Kuwei Yul-Bo in perfect, unaccented Kerch.

THIS WAS PERFECT

THE BEST WAY TO REVEAL THAT

(...), and Jesper flinched

baby he recognized wylan's voice

The Shu boy held out a hand. "Pay up, Kaz"

BITCH THIS IS AMAZING

THIS BOY MADE A BET WITH A CRIMINAL THAT HIS OWN FATHER WAS GOING TO TRY TO KILL HIM

AND HE WON THE BET

A nearly perfect replica of Kuwei Yul-Bo stood before them, but he had Wylan's voice, his mannerisms, and - though Kaz could see the fear and hurt in his golden eyes - Wylan's surprising courage, too.

i love it when they compliment him

my boy deserves all the compliments ever

AND KAZ IS PROUD OF HIS SON WE ALL KNOW THIS

Wylan cuold draw a perfectt elevation. He's made a drill that could cut throu Grisha glass from parts of a gate and scavenged bits of jewellery. So what if he couldn't read

this is taking me to some real places

i may cry you've been warned

WYLAN DIDN'T CARE THAT HE MAY BE STUCKED LOOKING LIKE KUWEI

this is making me cry

"A fool would have been waiting to be smashed to bits on that ship. And as for "traitor", you've called me worse in the last few minutes alone."

EXACTLY

YOU TELL HIM WYLAN

Instead, in that moment of threat, when he should have thought only of the fight, he looked at Inej.

BABY

i would've done the same tho she's pretty

amita is sooo pretty i'm gonna die when the show comes out

Jesper was staring at Wylan, his eyes roving over the black hair, the golden eyes. "Why?" he said at last. "Why would you do this?"

nothing to say here except: wesper

You... how many times was it you standing beside me on the deck at night when I tought it was Kuwei?"

"Every time."

i want to cry so bad

"Why does it matter?"

"I don't know!" Jesper said angrily. "Maybe I liked your stupid face."

a very staright and platonic thing to say of course

i know jes we all liked his stupid face

"Jesper made a mistake," said Wylan. "A stupid mistake, but he didn't set out to betray anyone."

YES WYLAN DEFEND YOUR BOYFRIEND

And maybe he'd kept him in the dark about Wyllan because he wanted to punish him a little

even kaz know they like each other come on

Jesper sat with elbows on knees, head in hands. Wylan deside him wearing th face of a stranger.

wylan give him a hug fro me please

he needs it

"Scheming face," murmured Jesper.

"Definitely," agreed Wylan.

i miss inej already

And I'm going to get my girl. Inej could never be his, not really, but he would find a way to give her the freedom he´d promised her so long ago.

i'm ugly crying and so what?

and now we're done....

i want to read this book again omg this is unhealthy

#shadow and bone #s&b #six of crows #jesper fahey #wylan van eck #kaz brekker #grishaverse #inej gahfa #matthias helvar #nina zenik #freddy carter #kit young #amita suman #soc #helnik #kanej #wesper

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ninaahelvar · 3 years

Text

Touch Me

Summary: Since leaving Ketterdam, Nina just wants Matthias to initiate and take control of his passions. So, she teaches him how.

AO3

A/N: I binged the entire S&B and Six of Crows series in like 2 weeks in prep for the show and lemme tell you...matthias was my favourite boi….and the audacity - so, i wrote a fic that’s basically just smut cause i said so and because i cried in my room for the last hour of Crooked Kingdom and i think that’s very sexy of me. Anyway. Enjoy this fic??? Its my first time writing nina and matthias so i’m still fairly new to their character voices and such, so if anything is a little OOC to you, i’m very sorry, i tried very hard.ALSO I USUALLY HAVE THINGS BETA READ, BUT NO SUCH LUCK WITH THIS ONE, SO THERE'S PROBABLY A MILLION MISTAKES, VERY SORRY!

Nina knew that Matthias was somewhat bashful when it came to being intimate - he’d blush up a storm when she’d kiss him, and practically swayed when she held her hands in his - but the fact that they had been living in Ravka for nearly a month since their success in Ketterdam and he still refused to touch her was getting a bit unsettling. Matthias had always been a hard man to understand, his Fjerdan ways so ingrained that it was like flirting with a brick wall, but Nina had persisted, knowing there was a man worth having under all that muscle - she just wished he’d take his passion when it overcame him.

After yet another night of unsuccessful wooing, Nina was beginning to doubt Matthias had any real intentions of staying with her. Sure, she was aware that Matthias wanted to court her like a good Drüskelle, but they weren’t in Fjerda anymore, he could have his way with her. If he ever took a moment to look at her. Matthias spent most of his days helping out the town with the horses and wildlife - mainly, he was big and burly and most of the women liked to ask him to do things just so they could stare - or he was learning Ravkan a little at a time.

There were times where Nina thought Matthias was adapting well in Ravka, his only failing was the fact that he didn’t speak much of the language. He gathered a few bits and pieces from other members of the town, but he spent most dinner conversations asking what words meant and scouring through literature to try to learn it with her. He was putting in an effort, even if the land they were in felt foreign and hostile to him; Matthias never had to tell her as such, he was still getting used to things, and it was always going to take him time.

Matthias returned home, shrugged off his coat and fell into the chair at their dining table, Nina sighed as she looked at him. His hair had finally started to grow again, almost falling into his eyes, even as his head lulled back from exhaustion. Nina walked over to him, dropping her lips down to meet his and he smiled as they touched.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to trim this?” Nina asked in Kerch - a language they shared and both felt comfortable conversing in. She tilted his head from side to side and combing her hand through his hair. Matthias snarled back at her. She giggled as she kissed him again, settling herself down in his lap. “I was joking, Matthias. But you look too Fjerdan as it is, some people in town might get worried and start asking questions if you look like a full Drüskelle.”

“I will not have my hair cut again,” he huffed.

“I know, Matthias. But true to learn how to smile. I may love your scowl, but it frightens other people,”

“I will, little red bird.” He gave a half hearted smile, as though it were still foriegn to do so.

“Now, eat dinner and we’ll sit and drink kvas while you tell me about your day.”

As she had said, they ate dinner, and once done, they sat by the fireplace on the rug, Nina’s head on Matthias shoulder, sharing a bottle of kvas as he told her about his day helping where he could around town. He wanted a real occupation, and it was beginning to show.

Nina had assignments from time to time - she wasn’t willing to be a soldier anymore, but Matthias encouraged her to learn her new Grisha powers in practical use, and the only way of doing that with the second army. Sometimes it was limited things like translation mistakes to foreign leaders, or things as disturbing as bringing a person back to ask how they died. Even if it were her new power, Nina didn’t like dead things - it felt wrong to urge the dead from their rest to ask them mundane questions. Nina was beginning to suspect that Matthias would want to join the first army if it didn’t mean betraying his home country. Part of Nina wanted to ask Zoya and King Nikolai if it were at all possible, but it was still an unrealistic idea in anyway case.

“What does koja mean?” Matthias asked, sipping at his kvas, a drink he still sneered out, regardless of how much he drank it. Nina sat up and stared at him. She knew he was learning Ravkan, but she knew she hadn’t taught him that word yet.

“Why?” Nina asked skeptically. How did he hear it?

“Anatasia keeps calling it out to me when I chop wood for her and her mother.” Nina huffed, folding her arms over her chest and sulking. She felt like a child as she did it, but she hadn’t recognised how jealous she truly was until he said it.

“That little -”

“What does it mean?” he persisted, and Nina huffed, standing up and patting down her skirts.

“Handsome.” Matthias cleared his throat and blushed.

“If I could speak Ravkan, I’d tell her to stop, you know that.”

Nina rolled her eyes. “No point. She’d just keep saying it when you couldn’t hear.” Stalking off to their room, she shut the door and threw herself down on the bed, trying not to grumble in her loneliness.

Nina didn’t know why she was sulking - well, she knew, but she wasn’t sure why she was angry with Anastasia. It was clear that Matthias was handsome, but maybe because Nina couldn’t claim him how she wanted, it felt unnatural to call him hers. She felt foolish and stupid for having walked out on him, leaving Matthias to clear up messes she had made throughout the house.

It took Matthias less than twenty minutes to make it to their room - a simple bed and nightstand and nothing else furnished the room, a lamp lit beside Nina. She looked up and met his wary gaze, Matthias closing the door behind him and staying by the door.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, voice rough like everything else about him. Nina sighed, standing and combing her hair from her face.

“I want to be more intimate with you, Matthias,” she finally admitted.

“We are intimate,” he said, frowning back at her.

“Yes, to your Fjerdan sensibilities, but I meant sex, Matthias. I want to have sex with you.” To finally say it felt like a rush of adrenaline going through her - and Matthias reacted the way she thought he would, with bright pink cheeks and avoiding her gaze at all costs.

“You’re aware I have no real experience with...this?” he said and Nina realised that all the time that had passed between them, she would have to be the one to do things - to say what needed to be said, because Matthias didn’t know how. She took careful steps towards him and smiled.

“The waiting gave me some indication.”

“Nina,” he said, almost as though he were warning her, but he didn’t step away, and even reached for her when she was within his space.

“Matthias,” she replied, “start with kissing me. I can take us from there,” she instructed, and Matthias didn’t need much prompting, tugging her the last few inches before crashing his lips down to hers. He was always a clumsy kisser, but it was as if as soon as he stared, he found his rhythm easier and became a master, making her weak in his arms.

There were many things that Matthias was good at, and one of them was messing up her hair. Any chance he could when they kissed, his hand would go into her hair and tangle in it to make it fall everywhere and there was no way to look put together. Nina didn’t mind, but she always wanted it to go somewhere - this was the only time it was. And it seemed to be putting him in the right mood as she could feel the press of his crotch against her thigh and she mewled in desperation, god how she wanted him. Then, as he tugged away, her eyes fluttered open, gazing up at his flustered face.

“I...I…” he stuttered, leaning his forehead against hers as he caught his breath.

“Matthias,” she said, “what do you need?” He looked at her curiously, as though he hadn’t expected her to even ask. If she could, Nina would make this perfect for them both.

“I want to be...in charge,” he grunted, the furrow in his brow telling her that he wasn’t quite sure how to phrase the things he said. Nina would teach him later.

“Would you like to be rough?” she asked teasingly, only to watch his head nod warily. Nina shuffled him back towards the bed, shrugging him out of his shirt as she unbuttoned her blouse. He watched in fascination as she left herself completely nude from the waist up. Matthias’ face was almost completely red as he swallowed hard, but he wasn’t even at the good part and Nina smirked back at him. Unbuttoning his trousers, and letting free his cock that had been straining in his pants as they kissed.

Nina bit her lip, her fingers tentatively taking his length in her palm, hearing his stuttering intake of breath. She felt powerful in a way that no grisha power could give her.

“What are you doing?” he asked in surprise and Nina shook her head, sinking down to the floor and spreading his thighs wide.

“Shh,” she silenced him as her “you’re a bit bigger than some of my last partners. I just need to get you ready for me,” she said slyly, her fingers lightly grazing over his shaft as she began gliding over it in soft strokes.

Nina knew she shouldn’t have talked about her previous exploits, but just looking at the size of Matthias, she had to give him some confidence - she knew she was bucking herself up to take him.

As her mouth descended on his length Matthias clutched hard into the sheets of the bed, her eyes wandering over his form as his breathing was harsh even in the pit of his stomach and her efforts became hard for him to bear if the furrow in his brow was anything to go by. Rising and falling, taking him to the back of her throat, she felt like she was salivating all over it, but knew she had to use his distraction to her advantage. She fiddled with the buttons of her skirt until it came loose around her waist and fell against her lap.

“Nina!” he hissed. Nina came free, gasping for air as she smoothed her hands over his thighs, tugging down his trousers until they were discarded over her shoulder.

“Shh, baby,” she purred, rising from the floor and kicking off her skirt and leaving herself completely bare before him. “Would you like me on my back or on top?” she asked, gracing her hand from her thigh and fingers dancing over her skin as it rose over the slopes of her body, drawing his gaze over her body.

“B-back,” he admitted.

Nina sat on the bed, crawling until she was laid up against the pillows and Matthias was looking over his shoulder to see at her. Nina took his hand, making him shift in place before he took his cue and began to move over her. Matthias paused, his adam’s apple bobbing and Nina thought he was going to back down again. She opened her mouth to protest, but he simply sank down and pressed his mouth against her thigh. Nina couldn’t help but have her eyes shut; it had been a long time since she was appreciated the way Matthias was doing just then.

Matthias kissed at her hips, his lips trailing over lines that had stretched over her skin until he was making his way up her sternum and pressing his lips into her exposed skin.

“You are so beautiful,” he said, eyes focused on hers even as his tongue ran over her breast. Nina wanted to whine, wanted to cry for him to stop teasing and get on with it, but she wanted Matthias to enjoy this as much as she did. Instead, she gripped his shaft, positioning him at her entrance. Matthias sighed as they touched, and he let himself sink into her. Nina gripped into his shoulders, sighing as he stretched her a little more than she was used to, but she was ready for him all the same; her body had been aching for him since she had him in her mouth.

As he sank all the way to the base, Matthias groaned into her shoulder. For a moment, Nina feared that he had spilled himself inside at first contact, but as he sighed, he moved again, almost leaving her completely before slamming their hips together. Nina gasped and Matthias found whatever rhythm he was craving. He was fast, almost brutal with the way his hips slammed to hers and he continued to grunt as if he were fighting for something. In other moments, where lust was all that had overcome her, she would have enjoyed this type of thing, but with Matthias - his first time - she didn’t want him to waste it.

“Shh,” she soothed, her fingertips running over the hard lines of his brow until he relaxed, took a moment to breathe, “we don’t need to go fast. Savour it, Matthias. Don’t you want to remember what it’s like?” she asked, her breath shaking as he looked down at her. He gave a stiff nod of agreement and took a softer thrust inside her. Nina hummed, nodding back to him, her hands roaming down to his hips, guiding them in their effort to find a pace that was suitable.

Eventually, Matthias evened out, finding his rhythm and panted along with her as their bodies moved together, gaining the pleasures that had been denied to them for so many years. Nina was moaning hard now, with every thrust from Matthias coming a little harder.

“My love,” he grunted, and Nina hummed, trying to keep herself from crying out.

“Oh, Matthias!” she said, throwing her head back, “keep going. Oh saints, keep going,” she pleaded, bucking up to meet every thrust that came faster, both chasing an end that was so within reach that they were fighting to see who could get there first.

“Nina, I’m going -”

“Keep going,” she begged, her nails fixed into the skin on his shoulders as their bodies came together in heated thrusts and as the coil that had been building within the pit of her stomach came undone in a beautiful release, her body rose to his and she cried out his name. Matthias whispered her name over and over as he pumped into her until he was finally spilling himself inside her. Nina almost bit into his shoulder, instead only gasping until Matthias shivering had ceased. As his head rose, he bent down to kiss her, stealing her lips with his breath coming in ragged through his nose, flopping to his back once they were done. They were both left panting, staring up at the ceiling in bliss.

“Can we do that again?” Matthias asked suddenly and Nina couldn’t help the giggle that erupted up from within her. “Why are you laughing at me?” he grumbled, rolling back on top of her as though he were gaining the upper hand again. Nina shook her head, her hands running over his shoulders.

“Yes we can do it again. You’re kidding yourself if you think I’ll only want you once,”

“I want you everyday, my love,” he said in Fjerdan. Nina smiled, tugging him down to plant his lips to hers.

“I love you everyday,” she replied back, kissing at his cheek and brow. “My beautiful Fjerdan.”

#my fics #helnik #nina x matthias #matthias helvar #nina zenik #six of crows #crooked kingdom #grishaverse fic

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dregstrash · 5 years

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king of scars re-read thoughts

i just finished re-reading King of Scars and boy oh boy I have some more thoughts (mostly on zoyalai, and damn this was a long post).

I ship Zoyalai even stronger than I did before

No seriously

Both of them are so determined to be noble and self-sacrificing that they lean on one another like two people who need the support of another (kind of reminds me of Nina and Matthias when they had to swim to shore)

Nikolai being so determined to save people. K I L L S M E

While I love a good broody, edgelord. I do love the heroic, arrogant type of dudes who are just trying their best

Also Zoya literally has a vision to save all the Grisha ever and if she doesn’t end up being Queen by Kos2 then what’s even the point

Cause she says that the people won’t accept her, but girl, seriously. Pull a Sultan Jasmine and just change the law--the perception--save the Grisha

I also didn’t realize the depth of Nikolai’s optimism until this second reread. Like it seeps into everything he is or does. With Kirgin, he sees the noble heart and not the rake (for the most part). With his real dad and his half-sister, their very lives are threatening to his position, but he won’t pull the trigger on them just cause he thinks their very lives shouldn’t be forfeit simply for his existence.

Let’s not forget the fact that he really believes he can get his country out of a very very very difficult spot through sheer will and wit

I am also revitalized by the secondary relationships (Genya/David, Nadia/Tamar). It’s like a found-family dynamic with just a dash of “everyone’s getting together and there’s Tolya reading poetry in the corner”

Also Zoya and Nikolai subtly checking each other out is 10/10 content

I’m no expert but Nikolai is defff an extravert (maybe an ENFP) and Zoya is obviously an introvert (I’m thinking an ISTJ, but I could be wrong)

Kid Nikolai kills me each time I read his backstory

Like learning why Nikolai is the way he is. Knowing why he wears a thousand masks a day. Knowing that he saw monsters in his own family and has been fighting them since his childhood is absolutely amazing.

“My ruthless Zoya, I’ll load the gun myself” --> Iconic. Brilliant. Love of my life

Zoya saying the people would “never” accept her as queen is entirely laughable. Because as we know there’s really nothing quite impossible...just improbable

After re-reading all the stuff about the Starless Saint cult and The Darkling’s impact I’m here to report it’s just as horrifying as the first time I read it. The Darkling was a lonely, arrogant, narcissist with a delusion of grandeur and his followers are the kind of people who will forever be quoting other people’s pains as something to be taken for granted because to them “everything happens for a reason”

Nikolai has all these ideas that he’s always seeking for power and ambition, and while that may be true to a certain extent he’s awfully ready to hand over his country to his most trusted adviser

Also Zoya’s arc in this book is absolutely beautiful. Like just her process of grief and how that manifests into anger and will. And the fact that Juris doesn’t ask her to stop being angry or good, he’s just asking her to reconcile what was so she could move on fully. He’s literally just asking her to heal so that could be another scar she carries to make her stronger, just like the claw scars she has

And don’t get me started on the Juris/Zoya mentor relationship. I love it so much. Literally the only person who can match her snark for snark, and I love his “give no shits” attitude, but still be able to care kind of

Literally everyone in this book is advocating for Queen Zoya 2020, and I’m all here for it

And for real, there is so much foreshadowing to the fact that Zoya can’t be stuck being general forever. Despite her own protests or what dictates as “normal.” I think for Grisha to enter this new world where they can be treated like people, they need someone with significant political standing, and if that isn’t Queen Zoya than idek (cause i mean wouldn’t that solve a lot of their problems with Parem? With a Grisha Queen the use of Parem could be heavily regulated or banned, no other country wouldn’t dare use it against Ravka in case of enacting war, and it could finally finally unite Ravka and Grisha alike?)

Nikolai contemplating his own death is such a mood. I know I’ve talked forever about Zoya and her arc, but damn Nikolai. The Golden Boy hero who is willing to act for the rest of his life just so he can save others. And despite his strength he displays such a tenderness that makes him sooooo loveableeeeee. Also, don’t @ me but the iconic line of “if things were different. if he was led by his heart and not by duty” was the beginnings of a love declaration. i’m standing by that

One of the lines that kills me each time is when Nikolai is facing off the demon (one of my fav parts of the entire book tbh) and he says “he would never, ever turn his back on a wounded man-- even if that man was him.” just that hit me hard. that someone so confident and so self-sacrificing can survive by staring at his fears and deciding he was worth saving too is incredibly motivational. And while I aspire to have the Steel of Zoya Nazyalensky, I want Nikolai’s ability to be so Determined and Dedicated.

I also want to make a point about different views of love in King of Scars. Cause I think Zoya’s view on Love is the fruity, lusty kind of love that never lasts. Nikolai’s view of love is unattainable and based on pleasantries. I think they’re in love in the sense of choice. That love is the choice one makes after the attraction settles down and becomes normal. They just choose to be dedicated and choose Ravka (and each other) over and over again. And I don’t think they’re familiar with that kind of love to even recognize that that’s what it is (this is my own personal theory, I could also be wrong)

Reaching the end and realizing that Ehri doesn’t even want to be Queen, I really highly doubt that this marriage is going to work out. Not even because of the lack of love. It’s her lack of love for the people and zero political ambition. That’s pretty much useless to Nikolai who wants more for his people (i.e. Zoya will be Queen, I will keep saying it till the day I die)

Also, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: The Darkling is a piece of shit

Juris will be #1 Zoyalai shipper. I can see it. I can taste it. It’s going to be grand

I may have missed this the first time, but Nikolai saying that they’re about to go to war again is insane, and damn if I thought Ketterdam was a raging dumpster fire of a mess Ravka is a Whole Ass Disaster

Final thoughts:

Nikolai is a good man and a good king despite his very mortal standing and him being vulnerable with himself and accepting his darkness is beautiful.

Zoya is a powerful woman, who has a lot of capacity to love despite what she thinks and she’s going to make a kick ass queen.

Zoyalai is endgame

Book 2 is going to be hella chaotic but I’m ready for it all

Ready for Zoya, Genya, Tamar, Nadia (literally all the Grisha women) to have their Avengers: Endgame moment, and destroy the Darkling for good

Ready for Nikolai to be himself unequivocally and be the King his country deserves

Ready for Zoyalai to realize that love doesn’t have to look like doe-eyes and silly platitudes, but it can look like understanding the other person and be willing to die for something greater

I almost wish that the Grisha TV show was about SoC and KoS, instead. That way the Grisha Trilogy can be told through flashbacks, and that way we can focus on the actual effect of the Darkling rather than glorifying him in this weird dark light (but that’s just me)

Anyway: ZOYALAI WILL BE ENDGAME

#zoyalai #zoya nazyalensky #nikolai lantsov #nikolai x zoya #king of scars #kos #leigh Bardugo #this book was all kinds of fairytale elements with political intrigue and i love it #soc may be the best heist story ever #but kos is the fantasy novel i dearly love #kos meta

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olympicreads · 5 years

Photo

king of scars by Leigh Bardugo rating: ★★★ 1/2 warning: this review contains spoilers. the paragraphs containing them will be marked accordingly.

I’ll find a way. All his life, Nikolai had believed that. His will had been enough to shape not only his fate but his own identity.

I was on the fence about giving this book 3 or 4 stars... Because this is a 4-stars novel, but I know that Leigh Bardugo can do much better, so I thought I’d be more strict in this case. I wish I was giving it the 5 stars it should’ve had, though. However, I can't do that in good conscience, because in more than one way this book was a regression to the bad aspects of The Grisha Trilogy.

I’m not going to say that this book was terrible, because it wasn’t. Leigh Bardugo is an incredibly talented author. The prose was great. The book as a whole was great... If you consider it a stand-alone.

King of Scars, as we know, presents us three main perspectives: Nina’s, Zoya’s, and Nikolai’s, with a fourth in the second part of the book: that of a new character called Isaak. I will be dividing this review into sections for each character, highlighting my likes and dislikes for each of them.

Nina Zenik

She is the only one that’s had a POV before this book. Incidentally, she’s the one who’s characterization jumped out the most at me, especially in the first half of the book.

[spoilers] When we first see her, she’s in Fjerda as a spy, working along with a familiar face, Adrik, and a new one, Leoni Hillis. She’s been on a mission for over two months, and for over two months she’s been dragging Matthias’ body along, refusing to bury him, hallucinating his voice in her head. That was my first indication that there was something “funny” going on: Nina had already let him go in Crooked Kingdom:

“In the next life then,” she whispered. “Go.” She watched his eyes close once more. “Farvell,” she said in Fjerdan. “May Djel watch over you until I can once more.” - Crooked Kingdom, Chapter 39.

And yet, despite having already accepted Matthias’ death, she drags his corpse along with her. I’m not going to lie: when she finally does bury him, I teared up. Her eulogy was beautiful. That doesn’t mean that it should’ve happened when it did. The importance he is given to Nina is far greater than that he had in Six of Crows. She loved him, but she loved Ravka too. She also loved her friends, and she missed her life at the Little Palace.

But for the first half of King of Scars, all she thinks about, all she cares about, is Matthias. I thought, “ok, maybe she’s rationalizing all the things that happened during her time at Ketterdam, her obsession with him is just a way to cope with PTSD”... but this all goes to hell when, despite her feelings, she willingly moves in with Brum at the end of her arc. She deserts Ravka and infiltrates Brum’s home instead of, oh, shooting his ugly face? When she’s got him defenseless, she chooses to keep him alive and not take him to Ravka for trial, despite the fact that she’s learned from him that they are planning something that relates to a Lantsov that’s not Nikolai, and that her country is at the brink of a war. She neglects to tell this to her allies as soon as she finds out and deserts the Second Army. [end of spoilers]

All of this plus the fact that almost nothing that happens during her arc is connected to the other POVs makes for an overall confusing portion, the poorest of the novel, that’d have been so much better if Nina hadn’t had a perspective in Six of Crows. She was wildly OOC, in my opinion. But again, that doesn’t mean that everything about her parts were bad. I loved Hanne, one of the newly introduced characters, and I love her chemistry with Nina. I really hope they get together in the second book.

Nikolai Lantsov

I love him. His inner dialogue is one of the wittiest I’ve read, and we can finally see that he’s as sharp on the inside as he is on the outside, despite his insecurities (or maybe because of them). The first half of his story was the easiest, most interesting to read. Learning about his trauma, his struggles, his (literal) inner demon, and how he puts on a smart-ass brave face in spite of everything he has on his plate, plus seeing his wit first-hand, was great. One of my favorite parts of the book, along with Zoya’s, but that’s for later.

[vague spoilers]

The second part, though... I don’t know how much the Grisha Saints are based on Orthodox ones, but I’m not a fan of their storyline. While I’m not entirely familiar with Orthodox tradition, I am (or, well, I was brought up as) Catholic, and unless I’m severely mistaken, there are many similarities in the way Saints are depicted by both. However, the way that they were showed in King of Scars left a lot to be desired, in my honest opinion. Saints are not “edgy” and “inhuman”. Alina was a more accurate representation of the “older” or more primitive versions of Saints than Lizabeta and Grigori were in King of Scars. While the idea of powerful Grisha who helped people in a way that made them be seen as miracle-workers or holy people is alright, them being “beasts” or animals doesn’t follow any traditional lore that I am aware of.

The idea of them being “wickedly evil”, or of someone like the Darkling being considered for Sainthood is not feasible I think, if not for anything else than the facts that he wasn’t a man of faith, he didn’t perform any miracles, he wasn’t a martyr, and he wasn’t particularly heroic or loved by the people, so I don’t see how he could be proclaimed a Saint or get such a large cult following that is not, let’s say, “Satanist” or heretic (to be fair, neither do most of the characters who have at least a pair of working braincells, but I digress). Hell, one of the Darkling’s own nicknames was “the Black Heretic”, so why the U-turn?

I suppose, though, that we could be given an explanation for this last part in the following book, so I’m going to be open about it.

[end spoilers]

Zoya Nazyalensky

I. Love. This. Woman... So much. She’s amazing. She’s one of the strongest, as of now most fleshed-out characters Leigh Bardugo has written, on par with Inej Ghafa, my overall favorite. Her POV was the one I enjoyed the most, her inner dialogue as sharp as her tongue, her story heartbreaking, and her personality as unapologetic but lovable (for those of us not under her glare, at least) as ever. I loved reading about her thoughts, her opinions, her likes and dislikes (though mostly her dislikes), and she’s 100% the type of female character we need more: women who don’t take no shit, but who are still human. Those who are strong but have feelings other than “murder”, that are not defined by what other expect of them, but still bask in the benefits their reputations as heartless give them.

[slight spoilers]

The only problem I had with her POV, one that is extremely easy to fix, is related to her backstory. It’s established that her father was a Suli man, meaning that Zoya is now canonically a biracial woman. This is amazing! The most beautiful, powerful Grisha in all of Ravka (or, dare I say, the Grishaverse) is a woman of color. However, the way that this was established left something to be desired: there was absolutely no indication other than that of her mentioning it that she’s in any way Suli. Compared to Inej, whose culture is shown in absolutely every part of her character, the difference left me a little bit disappointed.

I’d be completely fine with it if she hadn’t known her father, or if she had been taken to the Little Palace when she was too little to remember anything about her family, but she lived 9 years with her parents, and she never makes absolutely any mention of any cultural aspect that she likes or misses about her heritage. This could be done in different ways: a throwaway comment about liking a particular type of Suli food, an art piece that reminds her of Suli art she liked/hated as a kid, a cultural tradition that she still participates in privately, a type of cloth, anything. None of that is there, though, so I was left with the impression that Zoya was whitewashed. Not in the “common” way, of for example a white person playing a black character, but in the characterization sense.

A little bit more on that: when you’re writing characters of color, you have to be careful of many things. To name a few: not falling into stereotypes, making sure colorism has no bearing in the story, not oversimplifying issues faced by people of color, especially if you’re not part of that group, and that you’re not putting a “poc” label on a character that is otherwise white. The last one is in my opinion what has happened with Zoya. This can be avoided (and resolved) easily by including nods towards her culture. An acknowledgment that she’s not a monoracial white Ravkan through anything other than just one comment about how her father was Suli would resolve this issue and give us the most badass WoC in the Grishaverse.

[end slight spoilers]

Isaak

[major spoilers]

As for Isaak, I don’t have a lot to say about him, because overall I think he didn’t need to have a PoV in the story. He wasn’t a character we knew from before, so we didn’t care about him. He dies at the end of the story, his only purpose is to look like Nikolai and have the shortest almost-romance ever. All of this could have been shown through the eyes of either Tolya or Tamar, who always followed him around, so they could’ve shown the same story with no problem. All in all, his part wasn’t bad, but I didn’t care about it, which could maybe be a problem on itself.

Lastly, my biggest problem, left for last: it doesn’t make any sense to me that Nikolai and Zoya would willingly align themselves with the Darkling. Zero. They were extremely and personally affected during the Civil War, the book does an amazing job of showing their trauma as a result of it, but by the end they willingly accept to work with him? No. I don’t want to believe that. It’s a disservice to the sacrifices the characters made in The Grisha Trilogy. Are you telling me Alina lost her power, her friends, faked her death and married Mal for that? For the Darkling to be back? This ending is a disservice to her sacrifice. I didn’t like that plot-twist at all, and I really look forward to the next book, to know how this is all going to play out, because I’m extremely unsure about how good this development will be, story-wise, for the duology.

[end spoilers]

However, and to wrap my longest review yet, I want to say that this isn’t a bad book. The writing is fantastic. The characters, whether I agree with their characterization or not, are fleshed-out and sympathetic. The pacing is great, I read the whole novel in less than two days. While the world was already established in previous books, we got a lot more of depth and information about Ravkan and, mostly, Fjerdan and Shu culture. Bardugo remains one of my favorite writers in the YA and Fantasy genres, but because she is capable of so much, I wanted to give her work a review that reflects what I think of her talent, and of how much more I think she can do as a writer.

"Yet now that the time had come to speak, Nikolai did not want to tell this story. He did not want it to be his story. He’d thought the war was in the past, but it refused to remain there.”

#lbardugo #review #book review #kos spoilers #my review #king of scars spoilers #leigh bardugo #my diverse recs #3 stars #king of scars

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tearlessrain · 6 years

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so this turned into Scorpion King: Book of Souls Liveblog Part 1, because I got started late. witness a bunch of people trying to make one man’s considerable hotness singlehandedly carry an entire hour and a half long movie with very limited success under the cut.

I do want to state right up front that there’s only one reason I’m watching this and that reason is that for some reason zach mcgowan is the protagonist, so I’m not really up to date on the whole mummy/scorpion king franchise, the last one I saw was the one with all the jackal dudes and that was a while ago. so I have no idea what’s going on.

oh good they’re just going to town with the exposition, very thoughtful

so if the sword was forged in the fires of hell by anubis then who the heck did they fight when they were taking on the jackal headed dudes because I kinda assumed

are these two series actually related or

holy shit this is so Extra already look at this shit

y’all this is my jam I am living right now

also as people following my art blog may note, I am a huge fan of black and gold aesthetics. this movie is really just ticking off all my boxes right off the bat, it’s terrible, but five stars.

they’re REALLY going to town with the exposition

sword forged in the fires of hell that condemns souls to “the neverending darkness” and must be somehow destroyed... are we talking about anubis or sauron here.

this is just lord of the rings, but bad and with a sword. lord of the sword.

okay prologue is over and some dudes have smashed their way into a tomb. if the last however many mummy movies have taught me anything it’s that this might potentially be a bad idea

I love how they’re just not even setting up any of the characters we’re just diving right in I’m getting strong “yeah you all know the drill by now” vibes here

#squadgoals

really though the gal on the left is pretty badass, she hasn’t done or said a single thing but I respect her and her bootleg Xena vibe

and like shoutout for putting at least one actual black guy in egypt I guess

so I guess the one in the middle is... psychic or something? not that “hey if you plunder this blatantly cursed tomb it might be bad” requires psychic powers to know but

I mean that giant black sarcophagus they found recently in real life turned out fine I’m sure this will be great go nuts dude

uh oh it’s the fang of sauron anubis

oh that doesn’t seem good, but it’s actually the better option since for a second there I thought there were pulling a “black guy dies first” in ancient goddamn egypt

wait we’re still doing exposition okay the narrator is back. hi narrator I missed you.

look I know it’s campy and all but can we take a sec to unironically appreciate how wicked COOL this guy looks with his glowing eyes and crap. this movie is just so satisfying to look at, every single shot has been peak aesthetic

“SEND THE BIRD” and then it’s actually just a regular bird that was anticlimactic

HOLY GREENSCREEN BATMAN

holy FUCK WE’RE ONLY JUST NOW AT THE TITLE SEQUENCE WHAT

okay I guess now we’re going to ACTUALLY start the movie, third time’s a charm

and we’re off to a fantastic start my friends

and judging by the choices of the cameraman in this scene I can tell they’re trying desperately to distract me from the fact that the dialogue sounds like it was generated by a neural network that was fed several dozen mediocre fantasy novels.

it’s working.

I am being personally attacked. god.

oh no some people on horses are coming I assume from the background music that this is a bad thing

OH it’s bootleg Xena and her merry band of deeply mediocre extras okay

I understand the adorable small child’s father must die but must it be at the hands of the worst mediocre extra. seriously he’s been on screen for five seconds and I already hate him.

I guess the protagonist’s name is Matthias, other writers might have let us know that when he was introduced, but these guys know damn well that it literally does not matter what his name is. they could have had her ride up and be like “we’re looking for a man named Jebediah Switchboard McDougal” and anyone who’s voluntarily watching this movie in the first place would just be like “that’s fair”

yeah just in case you weren’t sold after the blacksmithing or the hunting scenes, let’s have him just singlehandedly take down half a dozen ninjas in less than a minute. just fuck me up

oh shit they shot him

oh shit they shot him again

they’re just boromir-ing the hell out of this dude

and yet he’s still going to town on those ninjas

NO NOT THE ADORABLE CHILD WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS

I’ve decided I don’t like bootleg Xena after all

it’s a good thing he’s got three arrows embedded in his torso because that is the worst cage ever. it’s made of like. bamboo and string. have you seen this man’s arms how did they expect that to effectively contain him.

whoa it’s... BOOTLEG XENA 2.0: GOOD GUY EDITION

or not. she didn’t free him or anything she just killed his original captors and then took off with the cage with him in it

no I think she is good she’s... healing him? by... getting scorpions to sting the hell out of him? has the FDA approved this.

I’m sorry I can’t take this scene seriously the background music is way too close to the “ooga chakas” from hooked on a feeling. also the sheer degree to which they’re pulling a reverse male gaze here is kinda overshooting sexy straight into unintentionally funny. I mean I know this is the entire reason I’m watching this insanity but like even I think this is excessive.

“the scorpion king escaped” that is giving him way too much credit he was stolen by the superior bootleg Xena.

and in case NONE of the previous things drew your attention away from the lack of a plot, here’s just straight up nudity because why not.

I thought I had a thing for zach mcgowan but I’ve got nothing on this cameraman.

also there’s some kind of “reluctant chosen one king” thing going on I guess but like they literally couldn’t have put less effort into it

I haven’t heard people this concerned about what the moon is doing since I left evergreen state college

aaand apparently he can see and speak to... ghosts now? ghosts that spit thousands of arrows from the sky? know what why not I’ll accept literally anything at this point.

oh they aren’t ghosts they’re just really sneaky dudes

it’s a shame jebediah switchboard’s one and only weakness is extremely shitty cages because he sure ends up in them a lot

hmmmm we’re getting some uncomfortable racist undertones and misogyny in one go okay. not worse than I would expect from a movie of this.... caliber, but I’m not thrilled, especially since this whole situation has yet to have a single actual point to it.

actually okay it’s veered quickly away from “rudyard kipling-esque Vague Native Tribe Encounter” and into... some kind of weird mad max thing mixed with a D&D campaign that’s gone wildly off the rails. but they’re on thin fucking ice.

I really appreciate that matthias is approaching this situation with exactly the same strategy with which I play skyrim, which is “sneak up on everybody one at a time even though there are a ton of them and that shouldn’t be possible, shoot them all with a bow you looted off one of them”

and now they’re just... suddenly free and back on their horses, then matthias had a vague fake deep exchange with the leader and they rode away. there literally was no reason for that entire interlude. nothing happened, there wasn’t character development or anything. this godforsaken movie could have been ten minutes shorter.

“the plot is down there, just past that greenscreen” is what I heard there.

I’m sorry I’m dying for some reason all I’m getting from this visual is “wait are you saying the panel is all the way on the other side of the convention center” like the costumes are just mediocre enough that in bright light they don’t look like they’re actually actors in a movie.

the moon’s rising. but I can’t for the life of me remember why that’s important. she’s got some kinda egyptian steampunk millennium rod though.

okay the lenses must align with the cipher. did anyone mention a cipher before who knows.

good job matthias you solved the moon puzzle and your prize is a metric ton of blue jello.

all right through the jello portal they go. to find the book of souls, probably.

in this case I actually do need more exposition. are we just not gonna explain ancient egyptian jello narnia. no. okay.

stop forcing zach mcgowan to be quippy I know all the cool movies are doing it but this is neither the time nor the place nor the actor for it.

oh my god they’re being attacked by a rock golem thing and I don’t think a screenshot can fully capture how bad the cgi is. not of the rock monster itself, but trying to integrate it with the real actors and set pieces was... oof.

okay a mostly naked woman has risen out of some nearby water and called off the rock golem with no explanation. why not.

neither of them looks into this so much as confused as hell

honestly, same.

oh god no they’re trying to make the rock golem be the comic relief this movie never needed. please don’t. you can barely handle writing the plot relevant dialogue now’s not the time to get fancy. I take it back, trying to make zach mcgowan be quippy was actually somehow not the worst option.

she IS the book of souls!

okay that’s a pretty cool visual I’ll give them that. digging the iridescent moon tattoo.

and that seems like a reasonable stopping point because I started this kind of late and have to get up for class in the morning. tune in tomorrow for, I assume, more of zach mcgowan running around in various states of undress while absolutely nothing coherent happens around him.

#tearless liveblogs #to be completely honest I'm not even sure what it is about this guy #like as you are all painfully aware I tend to lean way more toward androgyny but like #apparently I'll also take 'the concept of a panther but applied to a human being'#seriously though he cannot do the quippy marvel thing just accept that and don't try to force it

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crosstoglory-blog · 5 years

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The Rock on which Jesus Christ Built His Church

In Matthew 16, Jesus Christ, while speaking to Peter, said “And I tell you that you are Peter, and on this rock I will build my church, and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it.”[1] This passage is commonly understood to mean that Peter the man was the rock of which Jesus spoke. This is certainly the position of the Roman Catholic Church which has descended from the church that Peter started in Rome. However some churches, the Lutheran Church being one of them, maintain that in this passage Jesus was not speaking of Peter the man, but rather of Peter’s confession of Christ which he had just made. To put this in context, the entire conversation is quoted below.

“Now when Jesus came into the district of Caesarea Philippi, he asked His disciples, ‘Who do people say that the Son of Man is?’ And they said, ’Some say John the Baptist, others say Elijah, and others Jeremiah or one of the prophets.’ He said to them, ‘But who do you say that I am?’ Simon Peter replied, ‘You are the Christ, the Son of the living God.’ And Jesus answered him, ‘Blessed are you, Simon Bar-Jonah! For flesh and blood has not revealed this to you, but my Father who is in heaven. And I tell you that you are Peter, and on this rock I will build my church, and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it. I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven, and whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven.’”[2][3]

So what exactly did Jesus mean when He said “this rock”? Looking at the semantics of the statement, the statement itself could be interpreted either way. Jesus was speaking directly to Peter at the time and having just spoken his name, it can be argued that he meant Peter the man. On the other hand, Peter had just made his confession of Christ, so Jesus could also have been referring to the confession. In fact, it could be argued that the second interpretation is more likely the correct one because of Jesus’ use of the word “this” instead of “you”; i.e. Jesus did not say “and you are the rock on which I will build my church”. Note Jesus’ use of the word “this” in the previous sentence (“for flesh and blood has not revealed this to you”), when he was certainly referring to Peter’s confession. In the next sentence he continues to use the word “this”, so he must be referring to the same thing as in the previous sentence; i.e. Peter’s confession.

It is my position that the latter of the two interpretations is correct on the grounds that the first does not stand up to either theological or historical examination.

Theological Examination

When Jesus talks about the rock upon which He will build His church, he’s referring to the foundation of His church. So we have to ask ourselves, what actually is the foundation upon which the entire Christian church is built? There are many, many different Christian denominations who all have their own interpretation of the Christian faith. There are different opinions on the salvation of the soul, the nature of communion, the means and meaning of baptism, the righteousness of works, the nature of Christ, and on and on it goes. But the one thing on which all Christian churches agree is that Jesus is the messiah prophesied in the Old Testament, the saviour of mankind, or as Peter put it “the Christ, the Son of the living God”. This is the foundation of all of Christendom, the cornerstone of the entire, fractured church.

This in itself is a sufficient argument for my position, but there’s more. If Jesus had chosen Peter the man as the rock on which to build His church, then He would have been selecting a very shaky rock indeed. Peter was strong in faith but all too humanly weak, as are we all, when put to the physical test. Peter’s thrice denial of Jesus following Jesus’ arrest is well known. If Peter was the rock, then the rock crumbled as soon as it was faced with a real challenge. Further, it was only four verses after Jesus gave Peter the keys of heaven that He said to Peter “Get behind Me, Satan! You are a hindrance to me, for you are not setting your mind on the things of God, but the on things of Man.”[4] It is not likely that Jesus would have chosen such a shaky rock on which to build His church.

The argument for the case that Jesus was referring to Peter the man goes on to mention Matthew 16:19 in which Jesus gives Peter the keys to the kingdom of heaven. This argument states that as soon as Jesus proclaimed Peter as the rock, He gave Peter the keys to heaven; and the reason Peter was singled out to hold the keys is that Peter was named the rock. But look at Jesus’ wording in how He described the keys: “whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven.”[5] This is what the church refers to as the Office of the Keys; the authority given to the clergy to forgive or to retain sin. What is not commonly realised in making this argument is that the keys to the kingdom of heaven were not uniquely given to Peter. Yes, in Matthew 16 Jesus is speaking to Peter alone, but read on. Just two chapters later in Matthew 18, Jesus is talking to all of His disciples and He says this: “Truly, I say to you, whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven.”[6] So Jesus gave the same authority, the Office of the Keys, the authority to forgive or to retain sin, to all of his disciples, in exactly the same words that He spoke to Peter. Peter was given no authority beyond that of the other disciples.

Historical Examination

This question can also be looked at from the point of view of historical fact. If Jesus, the Son of God said in the past that there is a rock on which He will build His church, then as Christians we can be sure that there actually was a rock, two thousand years ago, on which He did build His church. All we have to do is to examine the historical record to learn what that rock actually was.

After Jesus’ ascension to heaven, the disciples went their different ways to fulfill the Great Commission; to make disciples of all nations.[7] We don’t really know where all the disciples went; the Bible gives only a partial account. Most of the disciples’ journeys have come to us by tradition. We believe that Peter went to Rome; Andrew, Philip, and John to the Greeks, Thomas to India, Matthew to northern Africa, Jude and Simon to Lebanon, Matthias to Cappadocia in Italy, and James the Lesser remained in Jerusalem. What we know for certain is that the disciples’ efforts resulted in Christian churches being founded in the middle east, along the Mediterranean coast of Africa, into Europe and modern-day Turkey, and as far east as India and China. These churches were mostly founded by disciples other than Peter. Peter founded the church in Rome, and the church in Rome had no ecclesiastical authority over these other churches when they were founded. It wasn’t until centuries after the deaths of the disciples that the Roman church eventually obtained ecclesiastical authority over churches outside Rome’s own boundaries; and even at that, the churches in the east (those that became the modern Eastern Orthodox Church), the churches in southern Ethiopia, and the churches in India and China were never under Rome’s authority. All of these churches outside of Rome were founded and grew outside of the authority of Peter, so Peter was most certainly not the rock upon which these churches were built. The only commonality among all of these churches is Peter’s confession, that Jesus is the Christ, the son of the living God, the rock upon which Jesus built His church.

[1] Matthew 16:18 English Standard Version

[2] Matthew 16;13b-19 English Standard Version

[3] The emphasis on the word this has been added by the author.

[4] Matthew 16:23 English Standard Version

[5] Matthew 16:19 English Standard Version

[6] Matthew 18:18 English Standard Version

[7] Matthew 28:19-20 English Standard Version

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dregstrash · 5 years

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“our christmas party turned into a tropical theme because the radiator is broken and it’s hotter than hell in here - damn you look good without a shirt i never noticed before asgdhfjgkhl”

I was tagged by @daniellepal to do some holiday fluffiness and I mean this is semi-canon so why not. I tried my best.

Modern Kanej AU

----------

Crow Club Inc. was a multimillion dollar trading company. It traded in the New York Stock Exchange, made deals with billionaires, and had offices in many locations all over the world. So Inej couldn’t understand why on Earth they couldn’t have their bloody radiator to work especially on the most crowded party of the year.

Inej had only been hired two years ago, as an outside consultant, but she had suffered through enough awkward office parties to know that if there was one party that needed the powerful chill of their air conditioning, it was their Christmas Party. But either Haskell, owner and CEO, was skrimping again or the old radiator had finally given up on this world. No matter the case, Nina’s carefully planned Winter Wonderland themed party was out the door, and a hastily improvised Floridian tropical paradise took its place. Unfortunately, the memo didn’t reach everyone so what resulted was a mismatched clash of heavy coats and gaudy floral patterns.

“There, at least you look on theme.” Nina came up to Inej and tucked a plastic flower behind her ear.

“It would seem I’m one of the few.” Inej smiled looking down at the borrowed red Hawaiian shirt that used to belong to Nina. It was large enough that Nina had wrapped a spare belt around her waist and managed to create a makeshift dress that was a little shorter than Inej was used to. When pointing that out, Nina had merely shrugged and gave a wink.

“It’s not my fault that Haskell is a cranky old coot who couldn’t be bothered to pay for a replacement heating system. Besides, I’m not minding so much now.”

Inej followed to where Nina’s gaze had wandered, and she shouldn’t have been surprised to see Matthias Helvar, the overly muscular, overly formal chief strategist, starting to take off his heavy Christmas sweater revealing the sweat-soaked white undershirt that was sticking to him like a second skin.

Inej rolled her eyes, and walked away before Nina had a chance to leave her first. While Nina just like to flirt her way through all the departments, she had taken a particular liking to the only man who seemed to fight every instinct to ever notice her. The two were explosive on their best days and decidedly icy on their worst. But looking at the way Nina was studying the young man made Inej think that one way or another Helvar was going to get cornered. And Inej hadn’t decided whether that would be a dream come true or his utter nightmare.

She made her way through the party, trying to make small talk with her other coworkers, but inevitably Inej found herself with her back against the wall and a soda nursed in her hands, being content to be the wallflower for a while and watch as the heat turned up higher and the party continued on.

After all that Inej’s been through, she couldn’t have imagined ending up somewhere she could have been happy. Doing what she does best and gathering data and information from all over the world and meeting people who could be her own family. She loved Nina and her energy. She had a few great conversations with Matthias every once in a while. And she even started to get to know Wylan, the new hire who was a wizard with numbers. It was even better because he just started dating Jesper, Inej’s first friend at the company.

“Brekker! Can’t you do something about this heat?!” Inej heard Jesper’s drunken yell and stifled a laugh.

Inej was sure that Jesper was the only one who could talk to Kaz Brekker as if they were friends. As far as Inej knew, Kaz Brekker had no friends and he seemed determined to keep it that way. He may have only been twenty-one, but Brekker was Haskell’s protege and an utter genius. He seemed to know things about the market that nobody else could guess or predict, and had launched Crow Club Inc., from a rundown building to an international success.

He was the one to find and hire Inej, and since then he went to her for advice, he sent her on assignments, and seemed to rely on her for things that seemed to be outside her grasp. But she managed and working with him had taught her so much about the tricky business of the stock market, the endless pit of greed of men, and the ruthlessness that was sometimes necessary.

“If you want to do something about the heat, Fahey, you do something about it.” Kaz’s rasp shouted.

“Gladly!”

Inej watched as Jesper stripped off his shirt and laughed out loud at the bright red color that rose to Wylan’s face. That seemed to rub off on the rest of the drunken partiers because by the time the heat had climbed up to sauna levels, everyone was either half dressed or getting there.

She was suddenly very grateful for the makeshift shirt-dress that Nina had made. Inej felt the sweat build up on her upper lip and on her brow, and if she hadn’t just promised to be the designated driver for Jesper and Wylan she would have left this hellish heat that was this building.

“I’m surprised your still here, Wraith.” Kaz said as he came up beside her. She didn’t turn her head.

Wraith, the nickname she had apparently earned after she had gotten unattainable inside information from the competing company belonging to Pekka Rollins.

“In and out like a ghost, looks like a bonus is in it for you this year, Wraith.” He had said. She had rolled her eyes, trying to let the flush of pleasure at his attention roll off her shoulders.

Inej did try to keep her distance from Brekker. But he needed her to be his shadow. To have ears open and watchful eyes at important meetings or inside another company’s walls. And she wasn’t completely blind, she noticed the sharp lines and tailored edges that formed his face and the way that his dark brown eyes analyzed and calculated everything.

But even with the face of some dark angel, he was cold, cruel, and entirely-obsessed with money-- or that’s what she told herself. Because even with all the reasons to not have feelings for Kaz Brekker, all it took was the smallest hints of his whole trust in her and her trust in him to break those walls down.

“I didn’t want Jesper and Wylan to die in a fiery crash, so I offered to drive them.” She said simply sipping her cup.

“Always the noble one,” The rough timbre of his voice vibrated through her and she wanted to close her eyes and revel in it.

“Someone has to be.”

“One can’t be rich and noble, dear Inej. And between rich and noble, I’d rather be rich.”

Inej scoffed and turned her head to give him a searing look, but then stopped short when she noticed that Kaz wasn’t wearing a shirt. Kaz Brekker, the master of the fine Italian silk, the young man who had a very specific personal space issue, and the champion of keeping it professional was not wearing a shirt and that very fact alone knocked Inej’s breath out of her chest.

The hard planes of his chest and the pale muscles of his abdomen were gleaming dimly with sweat, and his hair was pushed away from his face in an effort to keep the sweat away from his face. Lean corded muscles were unfairly put on display as he leaned against the wall next to her with his arms crossed, and when a drop of sweat rolled from his brow down his neck Inej couldn’t help but stare at it.

Inej coughed uncomfortably, trying to grasp at something to say.

“A-All the money in the world and you couldn’t afford to fix the heating?” She finally muttered.

At this Kaz’s shark eyes roamed over the barely dressed, sweating crowd, and fell back on Inej. He felt his gaze take in the length of her dress and the smooth curve of her neck, and it wasn’t until his eyes met hers that she realized she was holding a breath.

“I’m not sure all the money in the world could have given me quite a view like this, Wraith.”

He had walked away then. She didn’t know to where or what he was going to do. But she followed his movements, watching his muscled back, as he dodged the sweaty bodies and left the room entirely that she expelled the tension. It wasn’t until the temperature in the room miraculously changed after his disappearance that Inej fully processed what had just happened.

Kaz Brekker had complimented her. The cold-hearted Scrooge of Christmas had come up to her half naked and looking like a man strewn from stone, and complimented her. And for what it’s worth, Inej just drank the rest of her soda and almost wished that the heating would be broken forever.

#kanej #kaz x inej #Kaz Brekker #inej ghafa #holiday fic #sorta #i hope its okay #i tried my best #also a sweaty older kaz is all im here for

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dregstrash · 6 years

Text

a new soc and ck fan with some thoughts about Kaz Brekker (also a little about inej/kanej)-- it’s going to be a little long

I just finished both books last week and honesty, I have so many thoughts about one of my most favorite characters Kaz freaking Brekker that I am just going to write down because I can’t hold it in.

FIRST OF ALL

- I’ve never read a character so perfectly characterized as an anti-hero with a perfect storm of chaotic neutral and just a hint of chaotic good as Kaz “Bastard of the Barrel” Brekker. The self-proclaimed monster that he is, wasn’t because he was born a certain way or because he was part of some bigger prophecy. The fact of the matter is that Kaz was born into a loving family that fell on bad times. He was born to trust his older brother, maybe even idolize him, and see the good in people. So when that was taken away, when he realized that something darker lay about the world, especially in the hot mess that is Ketterdam he forced himself to start a new-- to survive. And if I may borrow a quote from dear sweet Inej, “The heart is an arrow, it demands aim to land true.” And truer words could not have been spoken in the case for Kaz. To survive means to have purpose, to have a reason to join a gang and rise up from the ranks, to have a reason to be ruthless, to have a reason to be angry at the world that took everything away. Kaz Brekker used vengeance as his target and in doing so has given him a “renewed life” just like he stated to Pekka about being reborn.

- Another thing about writing him as the perfect anti-hero/chaotic neutral. I know that at some point in his journey to vengeance and money, he realized that he couldn’t be left with weakness (i.e. human emotions). I think a common thing to look for in these anti-heroes is that sliver of humanity, that good deed that proves that these people aren’t as bad as we think or they think they are, that in some way they are redeemable. And I am definitely one of those people who try to see the good in everything, but in Kaz’s case I honestly believe that he is the purest form of anti-hero. He does things because they get him something. He lies because he has to. He threatens because he means it. He is blunt about what he wants (with the exception of Inej, but more on that later). But more to that, he doesn’t/never wanted to be a hero, he told Inej that countless times. He had to destroy any sort of altruism within himself because he had to, again as we’ve learned Weakness would get you killed in The Barrel. He did good things not because they were good, but because he really had to weigh the advantages and disadvantages. And that’s why I love him so much. He’s fearless. He doesn’t care. He knows that his life is short-- maybe even revels in the fact that he hasn’t died yet. I have never met/encountered a character who was so carefully crafted to be so cruel, yet so compelling and makes me care about him so much.

SECOND OF ALL

- INEJ. Freaking Inej Ghafa. His little Suli idealist. The Wraith. The only person in the whole entire Grishaverse that knew him, that knew his weakness, that knew her own worth, that knew enough that she couldn’t be the one to save him. In the case of Kaz, I love love love the fact that she acknowledges that she has feelings towards someone who had made the conscious effort to try and act cold towards her. She acknowledges and chooses instead to let him make the first moves because heaven knows that she wasn’t going to pine after him forever. And that fact alone forced Kaz to acknowledge that a small part of him that was still human. Whether or not the Bastard of the Barrel acknowledges it, Inej changed him in a way that no other member of his crew could ever fathom of changing him. Inej made him want something other than vengeance, power, money, etc. Inej made him try to face the waters that threatened to drown him every time his skin touched another person’s skin. Inej made him acknowledge that he was a monster, but that didn’t mean that a monster had to be completely heartless. Inej’s decision to be herself and to focus on her own goals beautifully brought out this side of Kaz that he didn’t even want to admit. That is undoubtedly one of the most badass moments ever.

- That scene at the end of Crooked Kingdom killed me. It was right before Inej met up with Kaz. It was when she was planning to buy a ship, gather what crew she could, and making plans to go to her homeland. She as reflecting about the meeting with Kaz. She was acknowledging that she would see him one last time, act like everything was normal because she would not let herself hang onto the Kaz she knew before the Ice Court Job. Her whole plan to just report to him what she heard and leave him to run his gang and let him go, was absolutely ruined-- not completely anyway-- because Kaz came to her without his armor. Talk about full freaking circle. Now was it what Inej wanted? I don’t know, but it certainly meant a lot to her. Kaz had made the conscious effort to take his gloves off. He made the decision to prove that he was willing to try, to fight his traumas, if only to get her to return. Not to abandon her mission, but to return to him as she saw fit. He let her brush against his knuckles. He let her hold his hand. He let her intertwine his fingers through his. Then of course we get the iconic “Is my tie on straight” scene and that was the epitome of a story that ended with the right amount of hope for the future.

AND FINALLY

- I don’t know if this is controversial, but I’m glad that we didn’t get a Kanej kiss. At first, like any good shipper, I was disappointed because after all this time, after the slow-burn romance of course I wanted a sweet kiss that would’ve made the ship “officially” canon. But honestly, I think the hand-holding scene at the end of Crooked Kingdom was pretty clearly an indication that it Kanej was canon. Just because we didn’t get the Nina/Matthias treatment of their relationship, does not make their progression to hand-holding any less valid. If we had gotten a Kiss from Kanej, I don’t think that would have stayed true to Kaz’s character, or Inej’s for that matter. Both of them have been through literal hell, and that largely involves their bodies. Kaz can’t handle skin on skin. Inej has had more than her fair share of sexual abuse. For them to suddenly share a kiss would be a disservice to their characters. Kaz still has a long way to go before he could ever think about kissing someone. Sure, he has said that he wanted to kiss Inej. He has made it clear that he has definitely pined after her, but his past traumas are still very much prevalent in him. It’s not an illness that is solved because of “the one.” It’s an illness that is fought step by step (or brick by brick if you catch my drift). So the hand-holding is that first step. I’m sure it was taking everything he had to keep the drowning waters at bay. I’m really sure he had to take several long deep breaths and reminders of who he was touching before it was comfortable for him to continue to hold Inej’s hand. It felt more natural and even more intimate than any kiss for Kanej to stand in front of the ocean holding hands because it was something Kaz had never dreamed of ever trying.

- Of course, in the future hopefully, I still want them to have that tender kiss because I am a shipper and I am allowed to dream. But that could take a while and honestly, I’m fine with that. Just the acknowledgement that both of them would fight with each other instead of trying to heal something within them they couldn’t heal is more than enough to make me happy.

#kaz brekker #inej ghafa #six of crows #crooked kingdom #really long meta #leigh bardugo #kanej #bastard of the barrel #the wraith #ketterdam

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