#and that there weren’t any other u dwelling problems
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#holy shit I was so worried about the doctors appointment with the cyst today#but finally good news!!! I’m so relieved!!! ;u;#my regular doctor is out for several months so they sent me to someone else and I liked her so much more???#she gave me stronger pain meds without me even asking#gave me more information that the er forgot to tell me#we said I had a cyst she was like well you did but it burst while you were in the er#she doesn’t think I’ll need surgery but they’re gonna do another ultrasound in 3 months to make sure everything healed properly#and that there weren’t any other u dwelling problems#she’s also gonna let me get my fallopian tubes removed!!! ;u;#my other doctor wouldn’t let me do it- my friend just had hers taken out and I was gonna go to the doctor that did hers but#she said she’s childfeee herself and believes it is 100% the patients choice#and she even said I can keep using the iud even if I get them removed to treat the endometriosis and to keep stopping my periods#IM GONNA CRY#DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG IVE STRUGGLED? DO YOU KNOW HIW MANG TIMES IVE BEEN TOLD NO???#IM SO FUCKING RELIEVED!!!!!! ;u;#AHHHHHHHHH#LIFES BEEN SHIT FOR SO LONG THIS IS HUGE#IM GONNA CRY IM SO RELIEVED AN DHAPLY OMG
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Inevitable
You knew it would come down to this. You didn’t exactly expect what would happen though. Even the best journeys end.
Transported au
So it was time. You suppose all good things must come to an end. The arklay mansion mission was around the corner, and although you had initially been ordered to stay home by Wesker, his decision was made void when Irons said that the omega team may be dead, and the alpha team might need a medic on hand. So you’re coming along.
He didn’t want you to come with, but orders were orders. The others just thought it was because you were the rookie and might get hurt. In reality, he knew it was a trap for them to die in, and he didn’t want to take that risk with you. You were more than willing to stay home but Irons just hates you. Maybe you played too many pranks on him and he got pissed he couldn’t prove it was you for any of them.
Well you hated him too. So I guess it’s even.
You were prepping for the mission with Wesker, who was very upset that Irons told you to go with, even though Wesker didn’t want you to come. Not because you weren’t capable of handling it, but because he wants you to be safe. He doesn’t need you to see what kind of company he works for, you don’t need to see that, you don’t need to be dragged into it.
But orders are orders, and it would be weird for him to blackmail Irons, I mean, “Oh he changed his mind after we talked”? That sounds ridiculous and he knows better than anyone you wouldn’t believe that.
Still, he kept you as close as he could while still making sure you didn’t run into Chris or Jill. His plan will go through, he will make sure of it. And he will make sure you get out safely and his plans with you being by his side will continue. Revealed tonight or later, you’re his rookie and you will always have his back. After all the things he’s been through, he needs this.
Wesker watched you through the cameras as you made your way through the mansion effortlessly. He didn’t expect anything less, you had always been perfect when fighting. Plus the zombies and bio-weapons just ignored you, so you could pass through them without issue. But that was also a problem, you were progressing very quickly, and getting closer to Chris. It felt familiar, how you seemed to know where you were going in the mansion.
He couldn’t help but watch through the cameras, how you carried yourself, checking around the rooms, and somehow making it to the music room. You made it there so easily…he was honestly confused. You’ve never been here before to his knowledge. While Wesker found you incredibly enchanting and enthralling, you were too close to discovering the truth and he’d have to steer you away himself.
Little does he know, you already know. You’ve always known ever since you figured out which universe you were in. He didn’t exactly keep a secret either, with the way he leaves work randomly and leaves for days at a time. Also he does not look up even though he knows that you like to hang around roofs. You literally saw him leave several times in a limo behind the precinct barely a block away. Plus his acting? Horrible. He should never be an actor.
Jokes aside, when Wesker appeared to you, you were quite confused. Why was he leading you away from the others? Well, it doesn’t really matter anyway. You knew how to get to them regardless, so you agreed to follow him for the time being. So far he wasn’t suspicious, but that made you wonder…Why wasn’t he suspicious of you? Was it because you actively befriended him and showed that? Whatever the case, you can’t dwell on it right now.
He led you to a very far end of the mansion, far from the others by this point in time, but you’ve explored this place before you came to this universe. He asked you to look around while he searched the other way. You knew he was just looking for information and data, but you said nothing and only nodded with a smile.
He left you again then, and you began looking around, the zombies not really bothering you as usual. You knew where everything valuable was, almost like a third sense, or maybe just your hazy memory of playing the game coming back to you. Well, it’s useful now one way or another. You would have to begin trying to either get to Chris and Jill or wait for them to come to you.
You’d rather them come to you, they’ll have to come this way eventually. And that’s when you’ll have to confront Wesker. You aren’t looking forward to that…maybe if you two had just a little more time together…no. He will always be himself and that path of self destruction was inevitable.
On the other side of things, Wesker was watching as he collected data from the computers. He watched as you took in every detail of the mansion, the furniture, the architecture, even the books scattered around.
He hoped you wouldn’t find your way to him, but being that you were rather observant though, that might be a hard ask. Maybe you won’t find out about him. And if you did, maybe you’d be by his side. That was a stretch but it didn’t hurt to think about it.
His hopes were soon dashed when you showed up with Chris and Rebecca.
“Wesker.”
“Chris, so you’ve arrived. Then again, you are one of my men.”
“Tch, Thanks.”
This conversation played as normal. Just with the addition of you. The rest almost played out as usual except for…
“How long has Umbrella been slipping you a paycheck?” Chris asked, which you could only stop yourself from rolling your eyes.
“Chris, I think he’s always been with Umbrella, considering everything.” You interrupted, surprise them both. It was so obvious, he didn’t even make an effort to hide it sometimes.
“What?” Chris and Wesker asked at the same time, gun still pointed at the two of you.
“…You seriously never noticed?” You asked, seriously wanting to know if he never noticed Wesker acting sketchy.
“…No? Why didn’t you tell me?” Chris asked, pushing towards you.
Rolling your eyes you replied, “Would you have believed me?”
Chris paused, looking back at Wesker, then to you.
“You make a good point.” Chris finally said, turning back to Wesker, you gave him a very unamused expression, before staring blankly ahead, eyebrows still furrowed in disbelief. Wesker too looked utterly shocked and disappointed, probably at himself but maybe at Chris too.
“They’re right. I’ve always been with Umbrella.” He stated, trying to move on from the awkward situation.
“Though, I am curious. How did you find out?” He turned to you, you glanced to him.
“I hang around the rooftops. I think we both know what I saw.” You replied, hopefully that’ll be enough. He has done a lot of things that were not far from the rpd…including getting into an Umbrella marked vehicle.
“Yes…actually. That…would make sense.”
The rest of the interaction went as normal after that. Him praising his new creation, said creation stabbing him and rushing after Chris. You however were ignored, as usual. You watched for only a couple of seconds as Chris was chased before heading over to Wesker.
He was still breathing. Barely, but it was there. You knelt down to him and gently placed your hand on his face.
“Hey captain…” You said softly, watching him struggle to breathe evenly, hand slowly down to his shoulder. Blood sputtered from his mouth as he looked to you.
“Why…didn’t you ever- ugh- tell the others?” He asked through bated breaths and painful pauses.
“I wanted to believe that our friendship was real.” You replied, hands reaching for his, “That maybe you weren’t all bad and you actually cared for me like I did you.”
“I do care.” He sputtered, his hands were going colder, “I’ve always cared about you.”
Your grip on his hands tightened as you held them, trying to save that warmth.
“Maybe in another life, I can find you again, and we’d live a happier way than…our current ones.”
He nodded his head as best as he could, a choked cough coming from him.
“My rookie…I’d love that.” His hands were cold. “I wish I could’ve…spent more time with you…”
He would be back, but for now, he is dead. And you’re holding his cold hands, his blood splattered over your arms and legs. You rested your head on his chest, just to hear him breathe for the last time. You didn’t know if you’d see him again, but for now, you can have this.
You pressed his hands together, on top of each other, and left behind something to him, and stood up. Blood coating your wounds, but not your blood. You would wipe your face too, but his blood stained you arms and hands. So, with one final goodbye, you set off to find Chris and Jill.
You still had some work to do.
…..
When Wesker came to, he felt stronger. He slowly got up as he surveyed his surroundings. A metallic clatter caught his attention, that fell from him, but that was not his. A necklace, with a wolf pendant. The ornate decorations were distinct. This was your necklace. You left it with him before you left the mansion.
He may have work to do, but reuniting with you was a big priority as well. And he’d make sure you knew every warm emotion he felt for you. He may be full of hatred now, but never for you.
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Are There Any Thatched Roofs in Australia?
UK citizens might think thatched roofs are quintessentially British but, of course, we’d be wrong. Buildings with thatched roofs have been around for millennia and are part of the history and culture of many communities.
But are there any thatched roofs in Australia? Yes, there are thatched roofs in Australia. Indigenous Australians used thatch to weatherproof their properties by using suitable materials that were to hand. These communities used different methods and different materials to thatchers in Britain and around the world.
But rural people the world over thatched their homes using what was locally available because it was cheap and easy to replace.
But we do have to put aside the idea that thatched roofs in Australia are similar to thatched cottages that are part of the chocolate-box idea of British rural life.
They are not. So to learn more about the types of thatched roofs found in Australia in the past and present, we need to delve deeper into the use of thatch ‘down under’.
Can You Have a Thatched Roof in Australia?
You can have thatched roofs anywhere. And you can certainly expect to see thatched roofs in Australia. They are rarer in Aus than in other countries, though.
And as with most areas of the world, you are quite likely to see thatch used on rural or heritage dwellings.
In modern or urban settlements you are more likely to find thatched roofs used in feature buildings, such as bars or pool houses, but these are often more about aesthetics than practicality.
Modern buildings tend to use roofing materials that are fire-resistant and scientifically balanced for both insulation and ventilation. Using thatch on modern architecture might not only look strange but would be difficult to maintain on certain buildings and expensive to insure.
Not only this but unlike modern roofing, thatching requires niche tradesmen whose skills are rightly expensive.
Thatch is also costly to maintain and, depending on the climate and weather conditions of the Australian territory you’re in, thatch might even be impractical.
To see why thatch is more rare in Australia than it is elsewhere we’re going to have to look to the country’s past, culture and climate.
Why is Thatch in Australia Quite Rare?
Let’s go back to the use of thatch by the inhabitants of various territories of mainland Australia before colonisation. Because Australia is continental in its scale, the indigenous people from various areas used different types of thatch for different purposes.
Those people in many areas of the country which is considered ‘the oldest, flattest, and driest inhabited continent, with the least fertile soil’ used thatch for shade more often than shelter from wind and rain.
But because the peoples of Australia were distinct communities, their methods of dwelling construction and thatching were designed to suit whatever their environment happened to dictate.
What Were the Traditional Thatched Dwellings of Australia?
This is especially true of the Gunyah, Humpy, or Wurleys which are domed or piqued structures that use whatever vegetation is close at hand. This might be palm, branches or scrub, or leaves and grasses.
Whether these can be considered to have a thatched roof is up for debate because the entire structure is constructed from natural materials. So it might be better to consider these domed buildings as entirely thatched.
The problem with pinpointing the breadth of thatched roof design and construction across the whole country is immensely difficult.
This is partly because the buildings are semi-permanent and made of natural materials that rot away. And partly because until recently, indigenous traditions weren’t recorded or investigated with much rigour.
How Did Thatched Roofs Change in Australia After Colonialisation?
The kind of thatch roofs that people from the UK are familiar with were constructed in certain territories of Australia but this style is considered ‘Colonial Thatch’.
It was used by the first colony of settlers to Australia and blended the thatching techniques of the UK and Europe with the materials used by the indigenous population.
As British colonisation of Australia progressed, buildings became more permeant and took on similar shapes to single-story rural dwellings in Britain and Ireland.
This included the thatched roof style that is common in the British Isles, including a timber frame, pitched roof and thatch tied to joists and topped by the ridge for added weatherproofing.
Arable farming became established in certain colonised areas and the wheat production added to the availability of this as an additional thatching material.
And because many indigenous people were forced into reservations or enclosures, many of their traditional dwelling types were lost to colonialisation.
Are Thatched Roofs Used in Modern Australian Properties?
The subsequent population boom in Australia since the post-war years has required a rapid expansion in housing. And because traditional thatched roofs require constant maintenance and are prone to animal damage, rot easily and are highly inflammable it’s easy to understand why their popularity had waned.
The most likely place you will find a thatched roof in Australia is for a garden or occasional structure of some kind. Pergolas, outdoor bars, or garden rooms are popular choices to add a thatched roof to.
And many holiday resorts like to amplify the ambience of their buildings by adding thatch to create an exotic paradise.
But just because thatched roofs have not been a popular choice for domestic housing in Australia in the last century, it doesn’t mean they are not an option for the right type of home.
Many people are looking at greener building choices and ways of incorporating sustainable materials into house design. And that’s why thatch is finding a slight resurgence in popularity.
The lifespan for thatch in Brisbane and Melbourne is roughly 50 years which is standard for most thatched roofs. And thatch acts as a natural insulator which can keep properties cooler in summer. It’s a greener choice than running air conditioning throughout the day.
And there’s no denying that factoring in a thatched roof into the design of a modern property would certainly have the wow factor.
And adding a thatched roof would also act as a nod to the traditions of the indigenous people of Australia and link the present with the past.
source https://villageandcottage.com/thatched-roofs/are-there-any-thatched-roofs-in-australia/
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Yandere NCT U: You hurt them to escape (Let's play ball unit)
All copyrights belong to @yankpop (aka me) so do not post/translate my works on any other platforms without my consent/knowledge.
Check more: Masterlist.
Female reader
WARNINGS: Kidnap/captivity situation; violence.
AN: NCT U - Let's play ball unit, except Shotaro (i didn't have inspiration enough to include him, sorry). Hope you guys enjoy it 💖
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Doyoung
Trying to stab him was the worst idea you could have, followed by trying to escape him. And you did both, so prepare yourself cause you’re in big trouble with Doyoung. He’s going to be fuming in rage at your petty and ridiculous actions. How dare you try to kill him? All of that so that in the end you can miserably fail at escaping?
The little patience he already had towards you is now lost, so brace yourself for a massive punishment. You didn’t care about him when you tried to leave him, therefore Doyoung will follow your motto regarding your punishment. You’re gonna be left in the basement for a few days after Doyoung gives you a good old-fashioned beating. During that time, you’ll receive only one meal a day and no treatment for your wounds. Think of it as time out to dwell on your actions and when Doyoung comes back, you better apologize with everything last energy you got.
"That´s it? You’re just sorry? That’s all I get after you violently tried to attack me and leave me? You better elaborate because I'm not opposed to leaving you here for a few more days.”
Jungwoo
Did you seriously think it was a good idea? Not really, but it was a risk you were willing to take to get away from him. Assuming that you wouldn’t be able to pass over Jungwoo (c’mon the boy is huge. Pretty sure he’s now the same height as Johnny) left you with a not so pleasant alternative that freaked you out. You weren’t sure if it would work or not but maybe it was worth a try.
As soon as you heard him lightly snoring, you grabbed a soft pillow and tried to smother him in his sleep. Your purpose wasn’t to kill him, but to leave him knocked out for a while, giving you time to properly escape the house without having him after you. You had seen some shows on the TV where this technique worked on knocking someone out, so maybe it could work.
The only problem is that there’s a big difference between what happens in the television versus real life, meaning your plan failed miserably and instead you were left with an upset Jungwoo, who locked you alone in a room for some good time.
He was seriously hurt at you. Imagine waking up while your beloved one is trying to kill you? Even if you weren’t actively trying to kill him, it still felt like it and Jungwoo is not gonna forgive you so soon. No more privileges until he’s absolutely sure that you won’t pull something like that again.
“You weren't trying to kill me? I don’t believe you, I'm sure you wanted to kill me, don’t lie. I can’t believe this.”
Mark
You impulsively pushed him off the stairs, thinking if he got hurt then you could simply snatch the apartment key he kept as a necklace and that would set you free from him, but not always things go as planned, do they?
Unfortunately, Mark didn’t entirely fall down the stairs as he managed to grab a hold of the handrail, saving himself with only a broken ankle and a few scratches. The moment you saw the scene unfold in front of you, you froze. Should you still go after the necklace key, or should you pretend like it was an accident? You should have thought faster because by the time you finally decided to go for the first option, Mark was already up and although limping, he still managed to grab you and shoving you towards a room, locking you inside.
Mark’s gonna be really pissed at you. What were you thinking of? Were you seriously planning to murder him and then leave? Whatever your plan was, he was glad it failed but you still had to answer for what you did. Mark’s gonna argue with you, yelling at you until his voice is sore and then he’s gonna ignore you for a few weeks.
“You’re such a bitch sometimes! I give you all of my love and in return, this is what I get? You better change that attitude cause I’m running out of patience here.”
Xiaojun
Hitting him in the head with a bat was something Xiaojun will never forget you did. Doesn’t matter if you barely used any strength when doing so, too afraid to actually kill him.
Because of that, you won’t actually be able to escape him as no damage was actually made but you’ll certainly pay the price for trying to do such a stupid act. You tried to hurt Xiaojun with a bat? Now watch as he beats the crap out of a friend of ours with the exact same bat. Same treatment except that the friend of yours is gonna have a much worse ending than what Xiaojun received. That's what you get for trying to leave him. Next time you try something similar, just remember that you have family members that can have the same faith as your unfortunate friend.
Although Xiaojun did bludgeon your friend in cold bold, he’s hurt with your behavior towards him and it’s gonna hurt him so bad, he won’t be able to look you in the eyes for a few weeks.
“Can’t believe you did that. After all these weeks together and you still didn’t accept me? Too bad cause now someone must pay for what you did. It better serve as a lesson for the future, got it?”
Jeno
You have no idea how you came across a rat trap simply laying around the storage room but once you saw it, you realized it could be the chance you were so eagerly waiting for. It was a perfectly good opportunity as it wouldn’t hurt too much Jeno and it would buy you time to find the house keys so you could get out.
Using a rat trap seemed like a good idea, but turns out it wasn’t. Sure, you got a head start to run, but you didn’t last much cause his house is conveniently located near the forest. It’s isolated so that the only solution is to stay near the road, hoping a passing car would assist you, which doesn’t happen cause literally no cars pass by.
It’s a piece of cake to catch you but Jeno will give off cold anger energy, which is really scary. Even worse is what will happen to you. Since you used a trap to limit his movement, then Jeno will do the same to you. Not with a rat trap but by chaining one of your ankles to a chain connected to a heavy cement block.
No way you’re ever gonna be able to walk around with that astronomical weight on your ankle, which is exactly what you deserve. Jeno will leave you like that in a room, and he’ll feed you, but if you want to use the restroom and need help for that, then you’re out of luck. If you can’t move on your own, then it’s no use to yell or beg Jeno to help you cause he’s not gonna lift a finger to aid you. Just like you did with him. Your bladder is so full that it hurts badly? Not his problem.
“You need to use the restroom? Then use it. Oh, yeah, I forgot about that tiny detail. Too bad that I can't help you. Seems like you're on your own, babe.”
Haechan
Poisoning Haechan proved to be a much harder task than what you expected. It was almost impossible with him always hanging around your shoulder, not allowing you one minute of peace. Plus, you needed to find out how to poison him. It felt awful to plan to kill Haechan, but in reality, he didn’t really deserve your compassion, not after kidnapping you just because he loved you.
You finally decided to poison him with some bleach you managed to sneak out from the storage room while Haechan was taking a shower. Maybe if you had been more careful you wouldn’t have been caught, but luck was not on your side and Haechan is simply too clever. He’d smell the chemical odor of bleach and even though he wasn’t sure what your plan was, that quickly became evident once you submissively offered to cook dinner. You tried to contaminate his food with the bleach but instead of Haechan eating the food, he unexpectedly offered it to you. He knew you wouldn’t eat the food, but he still wanted to test you, and ultimately you’d prove yourself to be unworthy of his trust.
“You did so much for me tonight so why don’t you have the first bite? No, c’mon, babe, you deserve it. No? I guessed so, you little bitch. You’re such a liar. No more eating from a plate for you. From now on, you eat your food directly from the ground.”
Jaemin
It was an accident, but you definitely don’t regret it. Smashing a vase into Jaemin’s head was the best decision you ever made since it allowed you to run away from him. Once you broke the delicate porcelain against Jaemin’s skull and saw him falling down to the ground, you ran as fast as you could, opening the enormous set of locks in the front door and finally being free from him.
For the next few hours, you were back into civilization, wasting no time in gathering a few belongings and some money to run away as far as you could. You stayed in a hotel, after taking a flight to a distant country. Maybe your mistake was using the credit card, leaving a clear evidence trail of your location. That was your ruin.
Jaemin might not be in the best condition to personally go after you, courtesy of the injury you gave him, but he’s sure not gonna let you escape from him. He’s gonna hire a professional handler to bring you back to him, someone that for the right amount of money will do anything and everything for him.
Once you’re back with him, you’re up for the worst time of your life. Be ready for a massive and cruel punishment. You screwed up big time and Jaemin is not gonna forgive you so soon. A combination of severe punishment and some guilt tripping and Jaemin is gonna break you into the person of his dreams.
“Did you really think you’d escape me? You’re mine and no matter what happens, I'll always bring you back to me. Do you see this? You did this. You hurt me, both physically and emotionally so now I'm gonna have to return the favor.”
YangYang
Locking him in the room and freezing the room wasn’t meant to happen, it simply did. It was improvised as you took the opportunity when you saw it. It all happened so fast you barely had time to think it through.
It felt like karma at first, that now he got to be punished for his wrongdoings, especially since you were the one with the temperature control remote. You lowered the room temperature till it was around 5º degree Celsius, ignoring all of his desperate pleas for help. It felt like a good idea, letting him suffer while you searched for the house code in the rest of the apartment, a combination of several numbers that would allow you to finally open the house from the inside and leave him behind.
However, the code was nowhere to be found leaving you no choice but to save YangYang unless you wanted to end up trapped for the rest of your life, which wasn’t the case. He was your way out and even though you tried to make all sorts of deals and even blackmail the young man, he simply didn’t reveal anything to you. Once YangYang is fully recovered from the harsh deed, you’re gonna pay for that. What you get is what you receive. Means you’ll get the exact same punishment that you forced upon YangYang.
“I don’t care if you’re cold. You deserve that since you did the same to me. I bet you had a lot of fun, didn’t you?”
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Tags:
@mwitsmejk
#@yankpop#yandere kpop#yandere nct#nct yandere#yandere nct u#yandere doyoung#yandere jungwoo#yandere mark#yandere haechan#yandere jeno#yandere jaemin#yandere yangyang#yandere xiaojun#yandere nct scenario
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[season 2] the epic highs and lows of jyp-u | skz smau
40— fixing problems.
genres: ot8!skz x reader, fluff, crack, angst, boarding school au, social media au, dark themes (in the future)— university au! they’re in college here
word count: 3.5k
warnings: smut lol (not really, kinda, it's not that detailed).
yellow sunlight peeked through the curtains, emitting warmth that spread throughout the exposed skin of your back that had slipped out from the blanket due to a night of slumber—
fuck.
you slowly opened your eyes, panic creeped up your nerves as you realized that you were not in your dorm room, and spending the night had not been in one of your agendas. you exhaled, settling back into calmness, it was too late anyways, though you planned on sneaking back to your dorm at night, it was hard to do so when your roommate was the vice president herself, who seemed to be adamant on following every single text on the rulebook.
there was no way you’d be able to get back without having to tune out one of her earfuls so you might as well just let it be.
“what are you thinking about?” you hear jeongin grumble beside you, trying to blink the sleep away as he rubbed the doziness off of his eyes, trying to focus on you.
turning to face him, you hugged the blanket closer to cover your figure as you rested your chin on your palm, staring back at him, “everything except you.”
he rolled his eyes, pinching your nose tightly, “ow!”
he muttered a few words of annoyance towards you as he tried to go back to sleep, “so early and you’re already so annoying.” he said, making you laugh at him.
you grabbed your ponytail from the nightstand, stretching it between your fingers and snapping it onto jeongin’s smooth skin, a hard thwack sounding from the point of impact making him yelp out loud.
you tried to wriggle away from him, but he was fast to get revenge, “come here you little shit—” he pulled onto the blanket, preventing you from sneaking away as he caged you between his arms that were placed on either side of your head, his firm torso now fully exposed in view as he hovered on top of you.
his eyes lazily drooped as he tried to give you a fierce glare, a sign of his still sleepy state, his head dipped low, trailing a hot blaze of warm breath on the crook of your neck, his lips ghosting on your skin, instinctively making you arch closer towards him to feel the familiar sensation of his kisses on your skin. but sudden hesitancy made him pull away, turning back to face you, “do you… think we’re crossing a line here?”
you stared back at him with the same curious thought dwelling in your mind. your affinity with jeongin hasn’t really been the most complex of relationships— it started during your first tutor session in the university library, with the two of you barely being able to progress from studying because he couldn’t tutor you well, and you weren’t helping either. emotions ran high, you two had a fight—and then your anger turned into fear, worrying that this might become the cause of you losing your friendship because of academics, but the opposite had happened. the frustration with each other turned into intense tension only relieved by falling into one’s desire, finding your back pressed on one of the bookshelves as he held you up by your thighs, your legs hooked onto his waist as feverish kisses erased all of the foul words that you had thrown each other moments prior. rules were broken as you both gave into sin, moans silenced by each other's lips as he took you to the edge of bliss in the linguistics aisle, his deep voice sending chills down your spine as he whispered to you in spanish.
only to laugh about it a few moments later when he admitted that he wasn’t fluent, he was just reading off of the cover of one of the books behind your head. sure, “learn how to speak fluent spanish in a hundred and one days!” isn't really the sexiest of things to say when you’re intimate with someone but you didn’t know any better. how jeongin did it with a straight face, you never knew.
ever since then, you’ve both dipped your toes into this little secret, one that you’ve never shared with anyone else. study sessions often end with him between your thighs or with you sinking down on your knees in front of him— was it the most productive way to study? not really. because you both barely made an effort to do so anymore. tutor sessions ended and you both moved on, never speaking of it again and just erasing it from existence. your memory being the only reminder that it had happened—but you were both civil adults who were on the same page about your physical needs and desires. you both did each other a favor and such things never leaked into your friendship.
perhaps it’s that secret bond that made you two closer. the comfort of trusting your most intimate selves with each other, solidifying an even deeper friendship.
you both knew how to not cross the line. your moments only really go down to a quickie in the library bathrooms or in the dorms whenever you both find that small slip of chance to be alone, there’s no romance behind it. but you both felt that last night was different.
the sudden acquisition of a private space without fear of disturbance caused a ripple to your routines, with the two of you taking your time with each other, exploring every nook and cranny of skin instead of just hitting it and quitting it. what’s also different is that you came to him with the prospect of sex out in the open—which you’ve both never done before. it’s usually just studying first—but when you’ve heard the news of his transfer issue, your heart sank, realizing that you might lose a friend, and those same emotions were mirrored in jeongin’s, bleeding through the way you handled each other with care last night—but platonically, right?
yeah. you definitely crossed a line.
you hooked your arms behind his neck, pulling him closer and crashing your lips together in feverish passion. hoping that if you both kept acting like horny teenagers then perhaps it’ll cover the fact that you both started to get feelings involved.
jeongin definitely realized his mistake too late, regretting starting back this arrangement with you. but he was too into the moment to think clearly, with the only thing filling his mind was how soft your skin was and how beautiful your voice sounded without apprehension. your soft whimpers carried by the air now that you two had the luxury of being in an undisturbed space of his private room.
fuck. you definitely crossed a line.
you both laid next to each other, coming down after another round of highs, you had thrown all caution to the wind as you’re now definitely late for whatever class you had today. your bodies were inches apart, never fully touching after having sex—the least you could do was not cuddle afterwards to maintain some illusion of a boundary.
you sat up, surveying the floor, “where’s my clothes?”
“i threw it away. you’re going out naked,” you elbowed him in the rib, making him wince in pain as he laughed at your frowning face.
“yang jeongin, stop teasing.”
“i’m kidding. i put it in the wash last night, should be dry now.” he shrugged, sinking back down on the mattress as you went up to get dressed.
“how caring.” you snided, but the thoughtfulness definitely threw you off.
“i needed to test the laundry machine in case there was something wrong with it so i used your clothes as sacrifice.” you rolled your eyes, already used to your friend never admitting that he’d ever do something nice.
“do you not have class today?” you asked as you slipped on the fresh clothes, he just shook his head with a frown.
“i’m… well… they have me on pause until we fix the transfer stuff.” you could tell that he was clearly bummed about it, with the short amount of time that you’ve both transferred here you could tell that he thoroughly enjoyed his time as well as the bonds he's formed.
you sat beside him on the bed, remembering seungmin’s words and his lack of assurance in regards to jeongin’s transfer. he sat up, welcoming you in an embrace as he buried his head in your hair. “you know this is stupid right? there’s no way they’re gonna send you back.”
he just shrugged, calming himself with a few deep breaths, feeling intoxicated with your natural scent, “why don’t you make me feel better again?” he asked, his hands moving along your hips, as he sported a mischievous smirk that you could feel on your neck which made you roll your eyes and push him away.
you glared at him playfully, trying to hide the fact that you were highly tempted to give into his proposition, “you’re annoying.”
he just laughed, revelling in your irritation everytime, “i know, i’ll walk you out.”
“uhh no need, you’re not even bothering to get dressed.” you said, shaking your head at the way he just wrapped a blanket around his waist.
“so what? not like anyone’s gonna see anyways.” he shrugged, pushing you out by the shoulder.
you still weren’t used to his new luxurious penthouse, it felt big, spacious. the lavishness reminding you of the difference between you and him—between you and the entire school population in general. perhaps yeji was right, the social class discrepancy was too big to ignore. you wonder whether or not you’d still be in contact with the people that surround you right now once you’ve graduated and have exited the little bubble of jyp-u, once you go out into the real world and have to crawl yourself up once again into the corporate ladder while people like Yang Jeongin or Han Jisung have their future served in front of them on a silver platter.
perhaps it’s that fear of uncertainty that makes you keep yourself at an arm’s distance. the prospect of being in a relationship with any of these powerful people being a bit too hard to handle— you were one to always think about the future, after all. you weren’t ashamed to admit the fact that you’ve wondered about the ifs and hows of your would-be relationship had you pursued either Hwang or Seungmin—both having corporate businesses to take over once they graduate despite the fact that the former refused to do so. you didn’t feel like you were up to the responsibility. you were a simple person, the life of a conglomerate wasn’t really something you’ve envisioned for yourself.
jeongin opened the door for you, gently turning you around before giving you a quick peck as you walked out the door.
*click*
you both froze, faces inches away from each other as you stared at each other’s eyes, not willing to look away in fear of finding out what’s beyond each other’s line of sight. changbin’s room was directly in front of jeongin’s, you didn’t care whether or not he sees you because the older guy already has an idea of what’s going on, you even ran into him whilst sneaking in last night and he was more than happy to let you off.
though the problem wasn’t the sound of changbin’s door closing, but it was the figure that you see in your periphery, frozen in shock at the sight of the two of you. hesitantly, you turned your head, only to find a shell shocked han jisung darting his eyes between the two of you and to the other person.
that’s weird, why would he be shocked at seeing changbin? you turned your head once more, realizing that the other figure was far from the shape of changbin, but instead, a familiar set of eyes looked back at you awkwardly—
“—ryujin?!?” you exclaimed
“y/n!” she greeted with a laugh as she caught you in the act, her eyes wide with surprise but also sort of expected it already. at the side, jisung pointed a finger between the two of you.
“jeongin!!” he shouted, making the younger boy cross his arms as he leaned into the doorframe.
“if you think that i’m gonna dramatically say your name back then you’re wrong.” he retorted sarcastically, making jisung roll his eyes.
“darn it.” he muttered, but his attention went right back on track, “so there is something fishy between the two of you, minho’s instincts really are never wrong!” he exclaimed with disbelief.
you tried to think up an excuse but jeongin barely made an effort to hide the fact that he was naked underneath the blanket and also for some reason he just had to give you a goodbye kiss—
“you saw he was there, didn’t you!” you looked at him accusingly. the younger boy just shrugged, a mischievous smirk in his lips before he stepped back into his room, closing the door in your face.
that little piece of—
“uhhh, pretend this never happened?” you asked ryujin but she was already quick to pounce on you.
“what was that y/n? you’re sleeping with yang jeongin? oh my goodness, the scandalous revelation!” she teased making you whine.
“you’re literally just coming out of changbin’s room?” you pointed but she held a hand up.
“first of all, i went to get some papers for the council meeting, and second, i’m not the one who’s wearing the same clothes from yesterday.”
darn. she got you there.
“now if you’ll excuse me, i have a meeting to attend and a bitch to cross.” ryujin said before walking away waving to the two of you before leaving you with han jisung.
“ummm, i’m gonna go too—” you tried to sneak away and thankfully, jisung let you. but you’d be wrong to think that he’d let you get away with it. he simply had other matters to take care of in the meantime.
was it mean of ryujin to use you as a scapegoat to escape the possibly annoying questions that nosy han has? yes, but she didn’t really care—she was one to look out for herself first.
which speaking of, it’s something that she feels like she’d be doing a lot today, especially as she dragged her feet to the main campus, her body autopiloting to walk her towards the student council office. it was something that was now instinctive with her routine, and despite her lack of contribution at times, it was unfair to say that she never helped.
ryujin went inside the office, the roundtable already filled with various papers and meeting snacks, everyone was already there except for the sophomore representative—but the guy didn’t really seem adamant on associating himself with student council business so it was understandable.
“you’re late,” the vice president greeted as she sat beside chan in the center part of the table. ryujin rolled her eyes, slamming a binder on the table as she took a seat, glaring at the vice.
chan clapped, getting everyone’s attention before ryujin could retort, “well, now that everyone’s here, why don’t we get started. mr. secretary, if you may please guide us through the agendas.”
the meeting started… smoothly, as much as it can be, at least. everyone was wary of speaking with mostly just changbin being the one amongst the lower ranks to give their two cents. yuna was fiddling with her fingers beneath the table as she watched the meeting unfold, there really weren’t much she could comment on now that everyone seemed to be listening to each other.
the first order of business was the representatives debacle—much to Jisoo’s dismay (or perhaps she secretly didn’t want to be here either), both Younghoon and her are now dismissed from duties and the council was now going to find better replacements.
“can i leave too?” eunha asked, which sparked another debate on whether or not they should let the poor girl go.
“she obviously doesn’t want to be here,” changbin defended.
“but she’s a huge asset!” somi fired back.
this continued for a few more minutes before the poor girl had to put a stop to it herself. “i’ll stay.” she simply said, shutting both of them up.
the next one was about christmas itineraries, the plans for december and what possible events could be interesting for the students—this continued without a strife, it was a regular topic after all, and begrudgingly to admit, ryujin knows that somi’s good at what she does, making her grumble underneath her breath.
out of boredom, she sneaks a glance towards eunha, more so with her binder. “what are you writing?” ryujin asked quietly as to not disrupt the current conversation ongoing.
“minutes of the meeting.” the junior simply answered.
“isn’t that the secretary’s job?”
eunha simply shrugged, “i wanted to do it too.”
ryujin shook her head at the odd girl until a paper sticking out caught her eye, making her raise her eyebrows—lee minho’s details?
ryujin immediately snatched the paper, making eunha cover it from ryujin’s eyes, “that’s confidential, i think. i don’t know.”
chan coughed, looking at the two of them, “eunha, ryujin, something to share?”
ryujin looked at eunha, “i think you should share this with them.”
“do i have to?”
ryujin rolled her eyes, sliding the paper to chan instead, his eyes gazing over the writing on the paper. “is this y/n’s report?” the president asked, making eunha nod.
“what is it?” somi inquired, looking over the paper.
“apparently someone’s been stalking minho,” chan explained.
“well we can’t have a danger like that around campus.” somi said, shaking her head, “changbin, prioritize watching over lee minho, make sure that you catch whoever is bothering him. we don’t want any student to be harmed.”
“got it.”
finally, the topic of ryujin came up.
somi was the first to raise her stand, “i still don’t think she needs to be here—”
yuna cleared her throat, raising her hand as she took out her notebook where she kept the writing of the points she wanted to make, “if i may speak, i have a few defenses on why shin ryujin should remain as a disciplinarian.”
chan gave her a small encouraging smile, urging her to go on.
“seo changbin and shin ryujin are great partners, they both have their own strengths and weaknesses but together, they form a good team as student disciplinarians. there have been many cases where students felt more encouraged or safe whenever ryujin was the one that handled them—i’ve also asked around past troublemakers and more often than not, they’ve strived to do better after talking to ryujin.” yuna handed out pieces of paper that recorded her small survey. it wasn’t the most professional but it was obvious that the girl did her best. ryujin was touched to have such a bestfriend.
“second, we used to have the problem of girls going to the bathroom to smoke and this is one of the more shallow points but changbin obviously can’t go inside the ladies’ bathroom.”
they all nodded in understanding.
“third, changbin is a gym bro, while ryujin is a trained self-defense martial artist. not that i’m trying to put down changbin here but in terms of subduing a student when worse comes to worse, ryujin has a better grasp on how to control her strength to not accidentally hurt the student. we’ve all seen changbin accidentally break a mug with his bare hands when he tried washing it, we don’t want the same accidents happening to a student.”
everyone nodded once again, even changbin who had to facepalm in shame.
“and finally, when in terms of approachability, students have raised the awareness that changbin often scares them hence when in need of help, they go to ryujin. changbin is a great office member but there are gaps in his skills that ryujin can fill as his partner, hence why it’s better to keep them as a package deal.”
ryujin held yuna’s hand underneath the table, feeling the shakiness of the younger girl’s grip.
everyone looked at her with a new sense of acknowledgement, with somi even clapping, “very well said, shin yuna. i suppose if you put it that way, we can rework a better team dynamic with ryujin in it.”
petty as she may feel right now, ryujin still hated somi’s guts, but she put that feeling aside to lower her pride and not put yuna’s efforts to waste.
“thank you, i’ll do my best.” she said through gritted teeth.
“i’d like to see more of that work ethic, yuna.” somi commented, making yuna nod.
chan clapped, signalling a meeting adjourned, “i think that’s all to—”
“wait.” seungmin spoke up, “i have another thing i want to discuss.”
everyone looked at him, waiting.
“i’m stepping down from being student council secretary.”
“WHAT?!?”
SYNOPSIS:
JYP University… You didn’t know what to expect, especially since you were simply just a charity case to a prestigious boarding school. You were intimidated— and rightfully so. After all, there’s only so much fun you can have till the pressure of college life gets to you.
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Hello love 😺 umm can u pls please please write dark!steve x reader, where he bully and verbally harrases the reader but somehow kind of love her but just treat her bad and degrade her but when someone else tryna make her fun of her then he shows who she belongs to kinda stuff (pls if u gonna write pls make it so it so dark🥺🥺)...... Feel free to ignore tho cause i'm sorry this seems so long 😬😬🧡
2/2 Hey it's me again 👋👋😬who just send u a request of a long one shot of dark steve rogers x reader where he bullys her but i just forget to tell u that can u pls make that a Highschool AU pls , i really forget to tell u 😬😬
bully
steve rogers x reader
summary: Steve bullies you after you rejected him and he soon regrets it.
warnings: dark, non-con, violence, bullying, blood, self hatred, insecurities, psychological trauma, they are of age, please don’t read if you’re not comfortable with any of these. Not proofread.
word count: 1.7k
a/n: just wanted to post something so this may or may not suck
masterlist
Steve wasn’t always a bully.
It’ll probably be because you hurt his ego.
Maybe he asked you out one time but you were new in school and wary of people so you politely declined his offer.
For Steve, he saw that as you humiliating him in front of the school. The new girl just rejected the Steve Rogers.
Steve would be like ‘who do you think you are?’ and the cheeky flirty guy he was before becomes someone else.
He started spitting insults here and there, never missing a day to make you feel weird about yourself.
The soft and beautiful blue eyes from before turned dark and hostile towards you.
Sweet words turned harsh.
Flaws that you didn’t see before started surfacing.
Suddenly your hair is too messy and all over the place. Your skin is too dead and it makes you look creepy. Your eyes are too dull and sad that you don’t seem friendly anymore. Your nose is weird, and so on. The list never ended and you started to change from the person you are before.
Steve made sure to make you feel the way you made him feel.
You suddenly became closed off and did everything to be unnoticed. It’s better to be a nobody than be the center of everyone’s torment.
Steve is a popular guy and it didn’t take long for everyone to follow his lead.
You’re just trying to finish your last year and finally leave the hell you created for yourself but Steve swore to make your life a living hell.
“If it isn’t my favorite dead girl!” Steve’s voice booms through the hallway, the chatters immediately stopped to witness the popular guy, and now, the loser of the whole school interact.
“Got somewhere else to be?” His voice was sweet as well as his eyes but you know, everyone knows that his intentions are far from being sweet.
“What? Your tongue isn’t working anymore? Bet it rot with your dead body and now everything is decaying with you, is that it?” He raised an eyebrow at you, waiting for his friends to back him up which they did. Steve smirked as the hallway started being filled with thunderous laughter and they’re all directed at you.
You did nothing but bite your lip in hopes of stopping yourself from crying in front of everyone. You can’t afford another round of teasing.
You fake a laugh before turning away from him and started heading to your last class.
Steve hated the way your eyes looked at his with nothing but sadness.
Your sadness wasn’t even directed at him but at yourself.
He just wanted to make you feel the way you made him feel so you can understand that the both of you belong to each other.
You’re fucking perfect and Steve is far from that. He might be the most popular guy in school but you were way out of his league so he had to bring you down just a little bit.
But it got out of hand.
He had no idea how to stop what he started but then something happened.
He was just on his way out of detention, the hallways are now empty, everyone has already gone home and Steve was used to that. What he wasn’t used to is the sound of whimpering. More importantly, it’s the sound of you whimpering.
He wasted no time and ran towards the direction of your voice and as he turned the corner, his blood turned red hot in seconds. He’s seeing nothing but red at the sight in front of him.
Mrs. Roberts asked you to come to her office before going home to discuss something and you didn’t know whether to cry because of sadness or cry because someone actually cares for you.
Mrs. Roberts shared her worries with you because your once impressive grades started pummeling down to the point where it can cause problems with your chances of graduating.
Mrs. Roberts gave you special assignments to do so you can pass her subject and you thanked her for that. You even hugged her so tightly and dwelled on the affection for too long which worried her.
“Is there something wrong, dear?” She asked, eyes glossing over yours with worry.
You decided against telling her and just shook your head at her. “Do you think I’m failing my other subjects? What if I don’t graduate in time?”
Mrs. Roberts was quick to calm you down, telling you how the meeting with the teachers went and even joked about you purposely failing only her subject which you laughed at.
You left her office with a smile, chuckling at the memories of her jokes when you suddenly felt an impact on your left side and then your right side when you hit the lockers with a loud bang, making you whimper in pain.
“The fuck are you laughing at, dead girl?” An unfamiliar voice says above you.
You look up to see a boy a year younger than you but before you could reply, his foot started meeting your abdomen, your sides, or whatever part of you that he could kick. At some point, he was able to kick your face which made your ears ring in pain so you decided to shield your head with your arms to block his kicks.
“I don’t know why Steve never did this before but I am doing it for him. He’ll be so proud of me! I can take over his place after he graduates.”
You didn’t even realize that you weren’t receiving his kicks anymore but the sound of kicks can still be heard.
You peak out of your arms to see the young boy’s body across from you on the floor, receiving hits from a large man above him.
“What the fuck do you think you’re doing, punk?!” Steve’s voice growls in anger and you didn’t know if you were thankful that you weren’t on the receiving end of his growl but it still terrified you.
“M-making you proud! I’m doing the thing you can’t seem to do!” The younger boy spits out red liquid before scrambling away after Steve pulls him up by his collar.
“If I fucking see you touch her again, you’ll never be able to see a day again, you understand?” Steve pushes the boy away before looking back at you, all the anger on his face turns into something softer.
He scrambles towards you, kneeling before you and helping you so gently until your leaning on the lockers, heaving at the pain that the boy caused you.
Steve continued to stare at you, eyes observing you before his hands gently prodded your face.
“You’re bleeding…” He murmurs before pulling out a cloth and dabbing it softly on the wound, apologizing when you flinched at his touch which surprised you.
“W-what are you doing?” Your voice trembles and Steve only sighed in response, shaking his head in disappointment.
“Why did you have to reject me?” He asked, carefully putting a band-aid over the scar and kissing it so gently with his pink lips. You stared at him in shock and confusion.
“Wh-What the f-fuck?!” You try to push him off but he only gripped both of your wrists with one hand while the other caress your face.
“We would’ve been so happy together. You would’ve had a great experience but you always manage to put yourself in danger… Why didn’t you just let me in?” The hand on your face goes to the back of your neck and your struggles were no use when he easily pulled you into a kiss, his tongue easily forcing itself into your mouth and coating and mixing your saliva with his.
“I should’ve not given up but you… you hurt me, ya know?” He pulls away before admiring your face.
“I lied though. You’ve always been so beautiful. I just wanted you to give me a chance but then you started avoiding me more.” His jaw clenches before his grip on your wrists tighten.
His other hand goes under your shirt before fondling your breasts through your bra. He leans in towards your neck before sniffing and moaning as he continues to massage your breasts while his hips started to grind against yours in need.
He growls against your neck as his grind started to get violently fast.
“Ahh fuck!” His hips stopped before he’s shaking against your body.
Your eyes widened at him as you looked down at the front of his pants which now had a stain on the crotch area.
“D-did you just—”
“See what you do to me?” He laughs before kissing your lips once more, the hand on your breasts trailing down before he forces it down your pants and under your panties to feel your core with his big hands.
His fingers make a quick swipe up your slit making you shiver at the feeling of him on your sensitive area.
“And I see what I do to you…” He inserts one finger, groaning at the way your walls are tightening around just one finger.
Steve swore he could cum again at the thought of his cock entering your very tight pussy.
“We didn’t start strong but we have all the time in the world now…” He places a kiss wet on your lips, continuing his assault on your core while his thumb finds its way to your clit.
Steve enjoys the way your hips jolted at the feeling and he smiled.
“I will help you graduate with honors and then after that,” he pulls back from the kiss before smiling at you.
“We’ll start over. I’m never leaving you again. I’m never going to give up on you. We’ll finally have what we both deserved.” He feels your walls fluttering around his one finger so he added another, thumb flicking your nub harder, forcing you to release.
“Mmm!” You bit your bottom lip as an orgasm was forced out of you, pleasure showering you as your eyes shut tightly.
“So fucking beautiful…” Steve pulls his hand out of your jeans before quickly placing his fingers inside his mouth to taste you.
“So fucking delicious as well.” He helps you up carefully before guiding you out of the school and into his car.
“I’ll drive you to school and from school from now on. There won’t be a time when I’m not watching over you. I’ll protect you from now on. I’m going to right every wrong thing I did to you, baby…” He leans down to kiss your lips then your head before fixing your seatbelt for you and starting the car.
“Everything will be better now.”
----
a/n: been trying to write but it’s just not working rn but im trying to come thru hehe
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Marvel: @jemzeraion
#steve rogers x reader#steve rogers imagine#dark fic#high school au#dark steve rogers x reader#dark steve rogers#dark!fic#dark!steve rogers#dark!steve rogers x reader
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Polkadot man x fem reader (part 1)
Obs:this story doesn't contain any mentions of she or her but it is implied that you start at the female part of the prison just like ratchatcer
Info:this will probably have some spelling mistakes because English is not my first language. This story might not be great because it's my first in awhile. Thanks for understanding
You shouldn't be here, you didn't fit in here. Well at least that's what you think, the ones that put u in this God forsaken prison seemed to think otherwise. I men sure you killed a cupel of people but they were gonna kill you first they just didn't get the chance.
Either way now you were stuck in this shit hole, not that living in the streets of Gotham were much better but at least you where free there. Here you were still the outcast you were out in Gotham, no friends and people acted like you didn't exist but that was all you had ever known so you didn't mind too much.
But then the day came, Waller walked in and apparently you were now part of a team. They all looked like idiots in your opinion well at least the ones you have meet so far, peacemaker, bloodsport and king Shark you thought their names were. Cleo you already knew of, not that u had ever talked to her,and that was it you thought until Waller backtracked to the guys wing again.
The man in front of u looked sad and if the eyes truly were the window's too one's soul, his showed everything about him at least to you. The frown on your face was probably very visible when you realized that all the information you were gonna get about this man was that they call him polkadot man. How was that fair even you had gotten more of an introduction and their really wasn't much to say.
The debriefing came and went and now you were sat between cleo and Abner krill as you learnt his name was in the helicopter. It was pretty awkward and your social awkwardness didn't help at all so you let the others handel the talking.
"so what do we do when we land?" it was Cleo asking.
"we won't land, we are gonna jump into the water. Less noise." peacemaker answered fast. One could easily tell he wanted to be the leader but had to deal with not getting his way.
Abner hadn't really talked efter telling you all his name but then again neither had you. But hearing the word swimming made that change real quick.
"whoa! whoa! Hold up nobody said anything about swimming!" you quickly stated before anyone could change subject again.
"yes, you have a problem with that?" this time it was bloodsport that answered.
"no, I just don't like getting wet." you said while looking at your hands. You didn't really want anyone of these "super villians" to know you were a bad swimmer.
You didn't get to dwell on it for too long however because in the corner of your eye you saw a small movement. You shifted so you could get a closer look at what was happening only to see Abner trying his best to hide something on his neck.
You were about to ask him if he was okay but before you could get the chance it was time to get in the water. It went surprisingly well, at least thats what you thought. You probably looked like you were in fact drowning, but at least you made it. You all made it to the shoore and went on to make camp.
You were at the back of the group on the way to your camp spot and that's when you saw it. Abner neck had a bump, that wasn't the weird thing however, nope the weird thing was that it was glowing a in your opinion quite beautiful blue.
"hey, are you okay?" you wisper to him. You didn't wanna make a big deal out of it, but something in you at least wanted to make sure he was okay.
He seemed to freeze up before a quick yes escaped his lips and he continued walking without so much as looking at you.
It may have seemed rude to others but you didn't mind. He seems like a withdrawn kind of person but so were you so you completely understood. However, much to your dismay and probably Abners too the others in your little group also noticed what had happened to Abner.
"hey! What happened to your face?" peacemaker asked seeming more concerned over himself other than Abner.
"it's just a rash" it came out fast and quiet, as if Abner were scared that if he talked louder something bad would happen.
"that's a rash?!" it was peacemaker again seemingly more self concerned then before.
Not much more was said about the subject and that seemed to please Abner. You however was curious now and hade to at least try and get him to talk to you. There was something about him that was drawing you in, something that actually made you want to get to know him be his friend. Hmm a friend now that wasn't something you had a lot of.
The campsite was not much of a campsite at all but you felt it better to keep your mouth shut. But this felt like the perfect moment to get to know Abner or anyone in this squad for that matter. However when you turn to look for Abner he was gone, probably took the first opportunity that he got to get away a bit. So you decided to see what Cloe aka ratchatcer 2 was up too.
Not before long everyone except you seemed to be sleeping. You were sitting on a log staring at the scenery when a rustel startled you. Your eyes snapped to Abners sleeping bag only to see that the bumps hade been growing and started to disform his pretty face... Wait pretty? When was that something you thought about anyone? Maybe being doomed to die did something to you.
But you didn't get to dwell on it for too long because as quickly as he hade moved he had moved on to the bushes right besides your camp. You were thinking about going after him and make sure he was okay but you didn't even get the chance to stand up before a rainbow of sorts seemed to be coming frome the bush.
Without even noticing you where sneeking closer and closer to what you assumed was Abner. You got about halfway there before he came back out looking exactly like at the prison before you left,well expect he had his undershirt on instead of his costume.
"are you okay? And I don't want you to brush it off this time." in hindsight you maybe sounded a little demanding but you didn't like death so you wanted to make sure.
"yes, I comes with my powers. It won't infect you I promise." his answer shocked you. Had nobody cared about him and just asked because they were scared? That didn't sit right with you at all.
"I wasn't asking because I was afraid, I was asking because I don't want you dead." you said that and then immediately regretted it. You didn't meen to sound so concerned and scared but in truth you were, so you guessed that was the reason.
However neither you nor Abner didn't get to think on it, because one of your team mates tried to eat another one of your team mates. The shark still scared you a bit but he seemed to agree to not eat you so it was a step in the right direction. That didn't mean you weren't taking precautions, you took your sleeping bag and moved it to where Abner was sleeping.
In the morning you were surprised to wake up to brown eyes watching you. It didn't make you uncomfortable at all, it made you feel seen and in a weird kinda way you hoped he would look at you more. But he didn't seem the kind to like eye contact.
The moment however was quickly broken by bloodsport yelling to get up and get our asses on the move. Apparently we were to find someone named Rick Flag. The camp he was being held at wasn't to far away and when you got there you weren't surprised that bloodsport and peacemaker were having some kind of killing contest.
You didn't do much because of your dislike to killing people so while they were brutally making their way through camp you quietly followed after. But you got wreckless and when you though everyone was dead you went out in the open. That was your mistake because a second later you heard guns clocking and people saying stuff you couldn't understand. You really thought this was it your last time on earth your last living moment, and your eyes went to his. At the time you didn't know why but it felt right.
His eyes weren't on you tho, no they were focused on something behind you. Before you knew what was happening he moved and stretched out his arms. Out of them came what you could only discribe as polkadots, quite beautiful if you got to say so.
You could only hear the comotion behind you and then the world was quiet again. Your eyes never left him and you could only wagly hear peacemakers comment about the polkadots. You desperately wanted to thank Abner in whatever way you could. But the moment was cut short by Abner himself.
"sorry it's so flamboyant" was all he said still not really looking at anyone.
"I think it's beautiful" you heard yourself say. You wanted to smack your hand over your mouth but the words had already left so what was the point.
Everyone else didn't really seem too care and quickly went to check on flag. And when you also started to turn around and leave, you chought his eyes again but only for a moment. You could feel your cheeks getting warm at that, damn him and his pretty eyes! But that also when you heard it, so quiet but still there.
"do you really mean that?" it was Abner, still behind you but seemingly closer.
"Of course I do, I may be the bad guy but a lier I am not." you said while turning to face him again. When you saw his face again you gave him a smal smile but a genuine one, then turned around to meet this new person you had never herd of before.
#polka dot man#Polkadot man x reader#Polka-dot man x reader#Polka-dot man#abner krill#I am a superhero#X reader#Suicide squad#The suicide squad
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Hiya when u gave the time can you please a continuation of the luke from skins one where they were in Morocco and they are both back from Bristol now and they see eachother again and it’s a smut where they r high and kinda intense if that makes sense 😂 ❤️
What Happens in Morocco, Stays in Morocco
This is part two to this imagine, find it here
Pairing | Luke x reader
Summary | perhaps, you were wrong. Not everything stays in Morocco. It is a tradition for things to come back to bite you in the ass, more so when you have been forced to be clean, and kept away from any kind of drugs.
Warnings | use of drugs, addiction, smut, it’s bit dark so read at your own risk, this is a warning so please keep that in mind,
Quick link to my masterlist, if you’re interested in reading more of my crap 😬
An insatiable stirred within your gut, pelting you with reminders of what you had lost after Morocco. The love of your life had been departed from your shaking grip, the people that claimed to care about you forcing you to be sober off the high that it gave you. Drugs. It was your only desire, but you stayed strong as you walked back from college, even as you saw a dealer out of the corner of your eye, trading his special product with someone in your English class, that sat two seats to the right of you.
Licking your lips, you held onto the straps of your rucksack tighter, hoping that the weight of all the items within it would succumb you under the lenient pressure that it composed against your spine, pushing you into a lower station of dwelling, so that you would feel nothing, and the emptiness sure as hell would not be burdening you with satisfactory mockery.
At such a young age, you had found a friend, even if it be absorbed into a conversation through digestion or clouded fumes. And without its presence you were someone else, a stranger trudging hopelessly through the ambient streets of Bristol, lost and in need for a high. That holiday had been the end of you, your friends didn’t say it, but you were more than certain that they were thinking such a spectacle.
Whilst you were amped up on various chemicals that engorged your veins with images of new possibilities, you were far from a sullen composure; you were happy. You had no problem speaking to Nick’s brother, though everyone seemed to be wary of him, and listening to Grace talk about her various recitals, and the strictness that her father intended upon her. To everyone you had been a breath of fresh air, until that place that they called rehab.
In there they had starved you from the one thing that you had truly craved. Even the security guy wouldn’t trade a blowjob for a little picking of white powder, and it showed you how messed up their priorities were. Morocco, it had been an escape, something you were sure it never feel again, but you wanted to, so desperately.
“If it isn’t the wisp of the waters, in the flesh, and looking like she could use a pick me up.” A blonde male asked, he couldn’t have been much older than yourself. There were scrapes adorning his pale complexion, brandishing his cheek with what could only be seen as battle scars from a testosterone endorsed fight.
“I’m sorry, but who the fuck are you?” You roughly spoke, having no recollection of ever meeting this man in your life, though, half of your memory was boggled. Going cold turkey appeared to have had that affect on you, but a deep internal part of you was warning you to leave now, and conserve your own safety from whatever offer he was about to propose.
Sure, you’d have once done anything, but the possibility of danger preached louder when there was nothing numbing your blood stream, and dirtying the contents that ran through it. A small snicker fled from the boy’s mouth, revealing that he was much amused by your naivety. He tilted his head, observing you with a lick of his lips, plodding closer as you froze.
“We’ve met before.” He toyed inside his pockets, extracting a clear bag that contained a couple of vibrant yellow pills that had your heart beating promiscuously against the captivity of your ribcage. “In fact, we got to know each other very well darling, your manners weren’t so spectacular then either, though they sure were better. It appeared as though you rather enjoyed the attention and now you’re here, looking like an innocent doe under the flare of headlights.”
“I don’t do that kinda stuff any more.” But you wanted to. It didn’t matter what prospects spewed out of your mouth in the form of conjunctive excuses, it was more than clear that you were aggressively attracted to the small spheres that had caught your attention fast. “I’d find the next girl to corrupt, because I’m clean and intend to stay that way.” Did you?
“You’re already corrupted, there’s no point in dismissing this, because it is what you want. But you’re denying urself from the simple luxuries of life, all because ripple; family, friends, think its better for you. They want you to be healthy, though that entails you perceiving though life as someone that you aren’t.” He sighed, rolling his shoulders slightly as his eyes bore around your sullen demeanour, recognising every trace that your body showed of restraining itself. “I’m Luke. And you, you are y/n, aren’t you? I’m sure I heard your friends call you that on holiday.”
Gulping, you realised that this must have been the boy that fucked with Frankie’s head, and made one of your group disappear, all whilst Grace was away, and in intensive care. As soon as it all clicked, you felt overwhelmed. There was nothing that you could do against him, he had already broken everything around you, whether that was his intent or not. Without thinking at all, you snatched the self made packet out of the clasp of his fingers, emptying the contents into your palm, throwing them into your mouth.
“Good girl.” It felt like a taunt, he was messing with you, you knew that. But it wasn’t his fault that you were messed up; all that was on you. “Don’t you want some water with that, it might make it wash down easier?” To answer him, you swallowed the pills dry cocking a brow at him as he pulled out another clear sachet of impulsive medications, taking it himself before you could whisk it away and endure further affects yourself.
Luke, feeling the tingle himself, pulled you down the alley that he was occupying, pressing your numbed back against the wall, his mouth running along your cheek as you felt swarmed with various desires. A part of you wanted to push him away, and beat him until he could no longer walk, but the other wanted nothing more than to feel his toxic skin dragging along yours, increasing the high that was spurring around your lungs until you felt like you could no longer breathe.
Your hands were uncertain of where they were supposed to be, and thus they roamed around his thin arms, grasping at his shoulders as his face sunk into the crook of your neck, his hands daring below your skirt, and feeling you up over your panties. Every touch he presented upon your burning flesh induced sparks to collapse in your mind, displaying through each of your appendages. “Fuck me, or I’ll find someone else to a better job.” You snarled at him, growling as he chuckled at your desperation.
“Now I recognise you, instead of that good girl facade.” He nipped at your neck, dropping his preppy slacks as he grasped his cock, thrusting your panties to the side so that he could penetrate your cunt, a cry abandoned your throat, echoing around the nearby streets. Your walls convulsed around him as you felt full and completely satisfied with the sensation. The memories of him flooded back into your mind as you pictured Morocco. He had stalked over towards you as though you were his prey, and it seemed that he had continued to hunt you down.
The thought was kinda hot, and thus you clenched your teeth, succumbing to an orgasm around him, whimpering as he slipped himself out, jerking his length so that he spilled his seed over your legs. “I have more of the good stuff back home, you fancy coming over?” Hazily you nodded, as his wobbling hand grasped your face, smashing his poisonous lips upon yours, suffocating all the good that you had been laboured into, making you swim in the darkness of his pupils as the two of you wobbled away from the scene, his cum still painted upon your legs as the two of you slowly headed towards his flat.
#luke skins x reader#luke skins#skins x reader#skins imagine#skins fic#skins fanfiction#imagines#imagine#xreader#luke imagine#luke smut
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hello!! It's your relief story anon!!! i friken love what you wrote!!! may i have another request 🥺 similar to the relief story, Levi's s/o gets into a near death experience right in front of him and he freezes for the first time. everyone's super shocked abt it after the mission and he gets reprimanded just for formalities (erwin n hanji rlly just wanna check up on him personally) but they all understand since he's been through a lot. Levi can't deal with his emotions and he wants to say i love you to his s/o (first time saying it) but he doesn't know how and yes HAHAHAHA
- OMG HI AGAIN ! IM SO HAPPY THAT YOU ENJOYED IT THANK YOU SO MUCH !!!!! thank you again not only for requesting that, but also for requesting again, it’s so awesome when u guys come back and request more :) plus your ideas are always so great. i had a lot of fun writing this, i hope u enjoy <3 (and i got your second message tysm for adding it ! i tried to include as much fluff as possible but my dumb brain always defaults to angst hahaha)
how to say i love you
- levi ackerman x reader
warnings: season 2 and ova spoilers (if you haven’t watched the ova’s yet they’re on youtube but this only references ‘a choice with no regrets’ aka levi’s ova)
levi has never had...feelings for anyone before.
the romantic kind, of course. he's felt plenty of things towards people on a regular basis—anger. hate. disgust. confusion. annoyance. frustration.
to be fair he has had the occasional friend, or the occasional person who he respected, and others who he flat out wanted to protect. just never anything romantic.
this didn’t bother him, falling in love wasn’t his top priority or anything. his life has been one traumatic experience after the other. there was no time for him to be romantically involved with another, nor was he willing to take the risk of potential heartbreak that would add to his constantly growing list of traumatic events.
when he first met y/n l/n he acknowledged her as nothing more than another member of the survey corps. someone he would work with. someone he would train with. someone who he would give orders to if deemed necessary. someone who would join his team. someone he would slowly become more curious about. someone who would bring him feelings that he couldn't describe in words.
his plans had clearly gone astray.
y/n was supposed to be nothing more than a colleague, but somehow fate had much more in store. the young girl began to appear more and more in his life and before he could even process it, she was already apart of his team.
now that the they were spending almost everyday together, along with the rest of his team, levi had the opportunity to try to solve the mystery that was y/n.
there was something that he felt about her that he couldn't put into words. the way she was determined to save humanity and her friends, the way she poured everything she had into everything she did, the way she was strong in every aspect of the word, the way she got along with the rest of the team, the way she laughed, the way she smiled, the way she spoke, the way she moved, all of it. it all encapsulated him.
what is this emotion ? fascination ? curiosity ? these words weren’t completely right, but they safe enough for him to settle on for now.
yes, that's all. the brat just makes me curious because i don't understand her.
at least, that's what he told himself. but the tingles that remained on his skin from the place where she accidentally brushed up against him or the way his stomach felt after his eyes met hers or the way he noticed himself always wanting to be near her or the way he wanted to protect her more than anything in the world, said otherwise.
whatever message he wanted to send probably definitely was not passed on. when y/n accidentally brushed up against him he snapped back "watch it." when she made eye contact with him, it was more her meeting his eyes and him seemingly glaring back. when he took a few steps towards her to be closer, she felt paranoid, wondering if he was determining whether or not he should scold her for something. when she was on missions and he occasionally had to step in and save her tail, she felt like she was slacking.
truthfully in all these situations levi just resorted back to his true nature. he never meant any harm so clearly he wasn’t the best at expressing his feelings. henceforth, the three word phrase was foreign to him.
after all the many challenges that came with trying to understand each other, the couple finally got together. but despite being together, neither had said the 'L word’ yet.
to be honest, y/n hadn’t dwelled on it too much. she had learned the best way to survive mentally was to live in the moment. when the time would come, the time would come, however, the thought that time wasn’t a guarantee gnawed at the back of her brain. she always wondered how levi felt about the matter, but never got around to asking. little did he know he’d once again find out for himself that time wasn’t a guarantee.
just like every other day, y/n awoke to levi placing a kiss on her forehead. he wished nothing more than to let the love of his life sleep late into the morning in their shared bed, safe from the dangers of the world, but there was another mission today in which he needed her by his side.
the plan was to head to the outskirts of wall rose to a forest that was known to be surrounded by titans. hanji convinced erwin to let her try to capture titans in the forest again, as it all but worked on the female titan. erwin agreed, not only because he too believed the survey corps had all the materials necessary to capture titans again, but also because he knew the scouts needed more real time practice in the forest. levi wasn’t happy to hear the commander refer to this as “practice,” since so many lives were guaranteed to be lost in the process, but there was nothing he could do about it.
with everyone’s approval and the preparations complete, they were off. the ride there had been as close to smooth sailing as possible, with erwin successfully rerouting the troops to avoid as many unnecessary collisions with titans as possible and a surprisingly low amount of abnormals in their path. but everyone knew the real problems would be up ahead.
in this area, the titans were mainly surrounding the thick trees in the forest. it wasn’t too far from the forest where they encountered the female titan so the layout of the jungle was fairly similar. a large path ran straight through the trees, leaving the scouts lots of opportunities.
before the forest itself came into view, the hoard otherworldly creatures showed up. the crowd of titans didn’t seem to be too bad, with none surpassing ten meters. a bit of the outer edges of the formation took a hit, but everyone else made it into the woods unscathed.
unlike the last time levi’s squad was in the forest, their objective was not to be the bait. instead, they were to take to the trees and be on clean up duty. it was a little different from their normal clean up duty, as they weren’t doing chores around the castle or cabin—they were eliminating stray titans. the survey corps was only prepared to capture two titans, so any others that entered needed to be exterminated.
they weren’t the only ones with this job, but erwin placed them as the last hoop the titans had to get through before they were captured. any titans that escaped the first few groups were more likely than not going to be challenging, so they needed to be left with the most talented squad.
the eight scouts that made up levi’s squad traveled the path that cut through the forest until they found the four trees in which they were to set up camp. levi and jean were on the first tree, armin and sasha on the one across from them, connie and mikasa on the next, and y/n and eren on the fourth. the formation placed y/n and levi diagonal from each other so they could each defend half of the younger scouts in their squad if necessary, as well as had the team in pairs that weren’t often together for even more practice.
the ground rumbled beneath the group as they looked down to see the first wave of soldiers acting as bait pass through. after some time and a few more waves, including hanji and erwin who were in charge of the traps, everyone passed through and the titans came into sight.
the ground troops had all reported that no abnormals or titans above ten meters made it in so they all relaxed—or relaxed as one can be when they’re facing man-eating giants. levi recognized the last troop passing through and gave his second in command a nod which she returned, letting everyone else know it was show time.
the rumbling of the ground from the horses before was nothing compared to that of the titans. not counting the first two, there were nine titans in all. everyone gave a silent thanks to the squads who had narrowed down the hoard before it arrived to them.
finally, the first two titans ran past the trees levi’s squad was hidden in, chasing the ground troops. with a loud “now !” from levi, the rest of them deployed from their hiding places. thanks to the squad’s impeccable teamwork and countless hours of training in forests closer to home, the remaining seven titans were taken out without a hitch. y/n couldn’t help but feel a sense of pride as she watched her team improve with every mission and it was obvious they all felt the same way. the way they beamed and had to hold back their celebration was as a clear as day.
the team regrouped, with y/n checking the younger members for any life threatening wounds and levi double checking all the titans were taken care of. she had just finished examining sasha when levi came back and announced the next step of today’s plan. everyone was to head forward to meet the other troops and aid in getting the titans back to the walls. although the titans may be secured, there were still infinite possibilities for catastrophes that could happen so they needed all the backup they could get. the young cadets nodded in agreement then followed after levi as he took to the sky, with y/n tailing the rest of the group. if y/n and levi weren’t side by side during missions, this was always the formation everyone fell into. levi led the way, protecting the front of the party, and she acted as the caboose to make sure no one got left behind as well as to protect them from the back.
after a few failed tricks from eren as he tried to show off with his gear and a quick scolding from levi, the rest of the scouts came into view. the mission appeared to be a success. the final two titans were both apprehended, one nailed to the ground and the other bound in the air.
squad levi landed and began to greet everyone but didn’t get very far when hanji’s squeals flooded everyone’s ears.
the scientist was practically bouncing up and down as she came over. “squad levi ! all in one piece, i see. let me show you what we’ve done,” she gushed, ushering all of them towards the titans.
it was no surprise she was so excited. she had been waiting for this day to arrive for ages, but levi still gave a quick “tch,” under his breath out of annoyance which forced y/n to cover her mouth with her palm to stifle a laugh.
the eight, now nine, of them cranned their necks up to see the side of the beast that was hammered into the ground. the sight would’ve been cruel if it were anything other than a titan, but remembering all the pain they’ve brought to each one of them, no one did so much as bat an eye. returning the focus back to hanji, everyone watched as she took a sharp inhale to prepare for her long ramble about how everything worked. lucky for y/n, before hanji could exhale, levi grabbed his partner’s arm and pulled her away.
he pulled her close so he could whisper in her ear, “come on, let’s go find erwin.”
as much as she wanted to argue with him and tell him he was being mean, she really didn’t want to listen to hanji’s spiel that she had heard a million times over. a tiny pang of guilt struck y/n for leaving the other half of the squad behind forced to listen to her, but sometimes everyone has to take one for the team.
she threw a quick wave over her shoulder to the others, then followed levi, who was still holding her arm, as he dragged her through the crowd of other scouts who were just floating around, waiting for orders, until he finally spotted the commander.
the tall man’s eyes fell upon the pair and he drew himself away from whomever he was speaking with to come greet them.
“ah levi, y/n,” erwin began. levi’s expression stayed the same but y/n offered the man a small smile and wave which he returned with a nod. erwin was actually the one who recommended to levi that he should consider y/n to be apart of his squad, so she heavily credited him entirely with starting your relationship with levi (even if levi disagreed every time she told him this).
levi and erwin fell into formal conversation, discussing the remainder of the mission, which left y/n realizing levi hadn’t really saved her from a talk you’ve heard countless times before, but instead brought her into another one.
hanji’s rambling would have been more interesting than this she thought to yourself as she began lazily scanned the small sea of scouts scrambling around, looking for a way to entertain yourself until the two men were done talking. one group in particular caught her eyes.
the soldiers seemed to be much more jittery than everyone else. they frantically looked amongst each other and towards the titan that hanji had just finished showing the rest of levi’s squad, and seemed to be contemplating a solution to an unknown issue.
it was clear something was up.
just as she placed her hand on levi’s shoulder to bring his and erwin’s focus over to the scene, the ground began to shake, which caught their attention for her.
no one had time to react when dust flew up everywhere, obstructing everyone’s views so they couldn’t see where the loud crashes that followed came from. a strong force slammed into them, throwing them who knows how far into the air. the fear of hitting the ground barely had enough time to settle into y/n before everything went dark.
everyone in the vicinity had been sent flying into the air along, but levi was the first one to be up on his feet again. bringing his arms up to shield his eyes, he decided to stay where he was as the dust cleared so he could assess the situation and move on from there.
the scene finally came into view; he gathered that the titan had ripped its arm through the nails that secured it to the floor of the woods, then flailed it around in an attempt to grab people. it made a clean sweep in the area that he was previously standing—all that was left were debris and broken wood planks from the compartments that were attached to the other titan’s traps.
a wave of adrenaline passed through his body as he remembered who was with him. he needed to find not only erwin immediately, but also y/n. he reached down to grab the handles of his controller grip but froze instantly upon seeing what had just come into view as more of the dust cleared.
y/n was sprawled out on the ground, ODM gear tossed a few feet away from her body but more importantly, the titan’s hand was hovering mere meters above her.
his pulse almost quickened twicehold, but it felt as though it heart had stopped in his chest. situations like this presented themselves to levi almost everyday of his life, but this was much different. in those, he was almost two steps ahead. he knew that by now he should be wrapping his arms around y/n and pulling her to safety at breakneck speed, or even better, he should’ve shielded her from harm at the very beginning. but right now he couldn’t do so much as move his finger.
levi was completely inert—his arms felt like they being weighed down by a ball and chain, his legs felt like they had grown roots into the ground that planted in him place. his throat ran dry and his stomach felt like it had just done a flip. the rest of him went numb while shock consumed his body, physically and mentally, rendering him entirely helpless.
images of isabel, farlan, petra, oluo, eld, gunther, and countless others all flashed before him, the same running theme echoed in his mind—he wasn’t able to save them. all he had to do was pull back a single index finger. this would launch one of his anchors into the back of the titan’s neck, sending him flying to slice its nape. but he couldn’t do it. the only thing he knew he had the power to do was watch helplessly as his partner would be eaten alive.
the shouts of others flooded his ears as his senses slowly began to return to him, but it didn’t matter. he couldn’t make out a thing. frankly he wished he could so he could break away from the things that occupied his mind now. shame. guilt. humiliation. fear. regret. he took for granted every moment he had ever spent with y/n. every smile she gave him. every time he embraced her. every kiss. every conversation they shared under the stars while everyone else was fast asleep. every opportunity he had but failed to tell her that he—
before he finished his thought someone finally broke through his trance. erwin was the one who was able to crack the surface and bring him back to life.
the commander was shouting levi’s name, hoping, praying, to wake him up from whatever was going on in his head. levi was still unable feel his body, but he realized he was moving as the ground began to grow smaller. one of erwin’s strong arms hooked around levi’s middle and they were flying away from the chaos below. the commander spared a glance to levi to see the man’s eyes were still trained on y/n.
the feeling returned to levi’s body as he felt the pain of being thrown onto one of the thick tree branches surge through his body. not knowing how else to bring him back from the trance that wasn’t full broken, erwin had tossed off of him levi instead of placing him down gently.
he watched as levi scrambled up and expected him to yell back for throwing him, but the response was much different.
“where is she ??” levi demanded. his eyes may have been on y/n the whole time, but his mind was elsewhere replaying scenes from the past. he had no idea if she had been eaten, or even survived the initial attack. the only think he saw was her body on the ground, unmoving.
“safe,” erwin confirmed. “hanji ran over just in time and got her. but what happened to you ?” no one had ever seen levi freeze up the way he did. others believed it was just fear which made him seem a little more human to them, but erwin knew it was more than that.
throughout the years, erwin watched levi witness the deaths of those closest to him, and even then he was still able to act. but after seeing him go rigid, erwin was more than worried. it was clear levi went into shock, however, shock runs more than skin deep.
this became even more evident to him as levi remained silent the entire way back to the walls. y/n was still unconscious, so one of the open carts was her escort. guilt continued to wash over levi as he wasn’t able to ride in the cart with her to monitor her closely because he had to ride his horse back. regardless, he stayed as close to the cart as possible and stole as many glances her way as he could.
if he had it his way, he would’ve waited outside the infirmary for y/n when they arrived back home, but hanji and erwin practically dragged him to the mess hall to replenish his energy. this may or may not be skipping the part where levi was questioned about what happened, followed by him being chastised for his actions (or lack there of). levi could bare focus even though it was such a serious conversation. his mind was still a hazy mess. as much as hanji and erwin wanted to talk to levi more about the situtation, they knew it was best for the conversation to end there for the day. levi looked so shaken up that he could barely keep himself standing so the last thing he needed was to be yelled at more. the entire corps also made sure to steer clear of the man. he usually had all his emotions hidden but they were on full display now. it still scared the hell out of them.
but the fear alone wasn’t enough to stop them from whispering to themselves. word carried fast about how captain levi froze up and watched one of his squad mates almost die. the ones who only heard about the story instead of witnessing it couldn’t believe what they were hearing. the captain levi did nothing while one of his own almost became titan food ?
hearing the whispers in passing, levi didn’t care that they were talking about him, but he was still affected. their words just made reality sink deeper into him. they weren’t the only ones who were unable to believe what happened. he really just watched helplessly as someone almost died. and it wasn’t just someone, it was his other half.
“hey levi ?” hanji voiced, pulling him out of his head. levi didn’t bother looking up from his food that he had been staring at for the past few minutes to face her. the best he could to was give her a side glance as he peered at her from the corner of his eyes and waited for her to finish.
the glare he was sending her way made her blood run cold, but she took the hint and continued. “are you alright ?” she asked in a small voice.
“does it look like i’m alright ?” he growled back, then went back to eating.
“just wanted to ask,” she added with an awkward laugh then turned to erwin who was on the other side of her. for once in her life she knew not to press any harder, but making levi upset wasn’t her intention. she was genuinely worried about him. hanji gave erwin a what do i do now ? look, hoping for some help, but erwin could only shake his head. he cared about levi just as much as she did, but he knew there was nothing either of them could do or say to make levi feel better. the only thing he needed was to see y/n.
at last, levi finished his dinner and excused himself to go find his partner. as his feet carried him at a quick pace across the stone floors of the many hallways in HQ, fear came back to his already grim mind. there was no word on y/n’s condition so he assumed no progress had been made and she was still unconscious.
needless to say, when he rounded the corner and saw her sitting on the bench right outside the infirmary swiveling her heels and tapping her toes together as if she was bored, shock overcame him once again, this time on a much lower scale. similar to just a few hours ago, he was frozen instantly upon seeing her. it was a much prettier sight this time, but it was still painful to see. the bandage that wrapped around her head peaked out from being any strands of hair that fell in front of her face, other wraps and patches plastered themselves across her arms and legs, and some purple and blue splotches peaked out from behind them. this was only the skin that was exposed. for once in his life levi didn’t want to think about what she looked like when she weren’t wearing any clothes. he made a quick mental note to later place tender kisses on all her bumps and bruises, and took of running towards her.
y/n had been discharged from the infirmary during dinner hours, so the halls has been quite empty as she sat outside alone, falling into boredom. when the first sounds of shoes hitting the ground entered her ears, she got a bit excited, but calmed herself down reminding herself it probably wasn’t him. but when the steps got quicker and louder, she finally let yourself look up to see up to see her partner was the source. there was no point in holding back anyone; her face visibly lit up and a wide smile placed itself on her lips. just like levi, y/n wanted nothing more in the entire world than to see him.
he run turned to a jog then a complete stop as he halted in front of her. despite being so anxious to see one another, neither were really prepared. they just kinda...stared at each other, neither sure of the right words to say. levi decided to take the initiative. he opened his mouth, hoping something, anything, would come out, but his attempt fell flat. words just weren’t enough. instead, he lifted his arms and placed both hands gently on y/n’s shoulders. she caught on quickly, standing up at the same time as he was pulling her into his arms for a tight embrace.
the pair remained silent in each other’s arms until y/n decided to take initiative this time and finally spoke. “is it true ?” she mumbled against his neck, barely loud enough for him to hear.
as much as he had hoped the gossip would stay in the mess hall, levi knew that inevitably word would spread to her. someone must have told her everything that happened, leaving in every little detail about how levi made no moves to save her life, ending up having to be saved by hanji in the end.
based off his silence, y/n knew levi had a lot on his mind so she continued “did you really freeze up?”
he didn’t realize it, but he had tensed up at her words. it absolutely pained him to answer, but he couldn’t imagine the pain she were feeling.
summing up his courage, he began to confirm the worst, but she pulled away before he could get more than a “yes,” out. levi braced himself for the hurt expression that he would be faced with, knowing his heart would break instantly as she realized he truly did failed to protect her, but instead he was met with kind eyes and soft face.
the look on his face had utter disbelief written all over it as her hands went up to cup his face that was now reddening. “are you okay?” y/n asked softly. “im so sorry.”
levi was beyond bewildered. he wanted her to be furious at him. yell at him. pull her soft hands back and strike him as much as she pleased. tell him he failed and that she couldn’t stand the sight of him. he knew he deserved it all and more, but he should’ve known she would never do that. that wasn’t y/n.
he melted into her touch and placing one of his hand over one of hers that remained on his cheek. “i was terrified, y/n.”
y/n finally gave him one of her beautiful smiles and giggled softly. “why were you scared ? i was the one who almost got eaten,” she teased.
y/n’s laughs had quickly subsided after seeing the serious look that had etched itself onto levi’s face. “because you were in danger,” he started.
“i don’t know what id do with myself if i lost you, i...”
“i love you, y/n.”
it was finally y/n’s turn to get a taste of the shock that levi had been experiencing all day. she could’ve sworn her heart skipped a beat at his words, followed by butterfly wings tickling the inside of her tummy, her eyes widening and jaw falling slack. her hands slowly slipped from his face to instead place one of her palms on her chest to make sure her heart was indeed pumping at a regular pace.
levi, on the other hand, was not having a magical experience. y/n’s reaction made him feel as though his feelings weren’t reciprocated despite having been together for so long. he started to get deeper into his head, negative thoughts starting to eat away at him once again, when she finally spoke.
“i love you too, levi,” she breathed out, still too stunned to breathe properly.
levi had had enough of being unable to move for one day. one of his hands grabbed y/n’s waist while the other found its way to the back of her head, as he kissed her roughly, which she eagerly returned. the way he felt her grin against his lips was enough to make all the pain and fear he had experienced that day worth it.
he couldn’t have asked for a better outcome to such a shitty day.
levi had finally learned how to say i love you and he thanked the stars every night following that day that y/n was the one who taught him how.
#attack on titan#aot#attack on titan x reader#aot x reader#shingeki no kyojin#snk#shingeki no kyojin x reader#snk x reader#levi ackerman#levi ackermann#levi ackerman x reader#levi ackermann x reader#levi x reader
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ghostin || part one. (m.)
all rights reserved © pradaksj
↳do not repost, translate, or claim as your own.
❧ summary ⟶ ❝Though I wish he were here instead. Don't want that living in your head, he just comes to visit me when I'm dreaming every now and then. ❞
❧ pairing⟶ seokjin/reader
❧ genre⟶ angst, angst, and angst … did i say angst? + a bit of fluff? friends to lovers.
❧ word count ⟶ 20,000+
❧ warnings ⟶ major character death! sad ending. descriptions of grieving process.
❧ a/n ⟶ this is based on both ghostin by ariana grande and the one that got away by katy perry and pluto projector by rex orange county which has a godlike violin instrumental that is a perfect fit for this story. i def recommend listening to the slowed + reverb versions. + i tried to make transitions as clear as possible so please let me know how i did on those :( and lastly ermmm dont stress too much on specific time stamps and ages bc ermmm I just did quick maths for a lot of it LMAO
❧ part of the ⟶ thank u, next series
part 1 || part 2 (final)
2050.
“Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday dear grandma, happy birthday to you!” the sound of multiple claps echo across the room, symbolizing the start of a new year for you.
Today was your 75th birthday celebration and around you were your two grandkids along with your only daughter. It seemed as the years went by, the need for such grand celebrations weren’t as important as they used to be. A simple cutting of the cake surrounded by the people you love being enough to suffice.
“Grandma! You have to blow the candles out!” your youngest grandson eagerly reminds you, ready to blow them out himself if you didn’t take action soon, “and don’t forget to make a wish and don’t tell us or else it won’t come true!”
“Mm,” you smile warmly, gently closing your eyes and puffing a gentle huff of air, your mind blank of any wishes, for you had stopped believing in the magic of wishes a long long time ago.
“Alright, now to cut it … Jia go grab a cutting knife from the block set,” you hear your daughter command your oldest grandchild, who at this moment was clearly too consumed with whatever she had going on in her phone to even bother listening, “Jia!” she finally snaps her head up at the sound of her mother’s voice raising an octave, “How many times do I have to tell you to stop using that phone so much, not only is it rude but we’re celebrating your grandma’s birthday. The least you can do is have the courtesy to turn off your phone.”
She rolls her eyes in response, “Mom, I’m sure grandma doesn’t mind … right grandma?” she flashes you the toothy grin that you were used to seeing whenever she wanted something, knowing she’s always had a special place in your heart as the first grandchild.
All you can do is chuckle softly, feeling too old to entertain and be dragged into the bickering arguments between your daughter and granddaughter. Carefully you get up yourself and grab a cutting knife despite your daughter’s pleas to sit.
“Look at what you’ve made your grandma do Ji—” but before your daughter could continue with her scolding, you raise a hand as a gesture of interrupting.
“I’m old, but I’m not that old Yeojin, getting up to grab a knife isn’t the end of the world for me,” you sigh, “Now let’s stop with all of the bickering and eat some cake.”
It was odd really, growing up you could never exactly picture yourself getting to this age (not that you weren’t ever hoping to), but like any other person you just always pictured yourself being young forever.
It wasn’t until your first gray hair appeared several years ago that it suddenly struck you that you really were actually aging. From there the wrinkles upon your skin grew to be more prevalent and things you had no problem doing when you were in your teenage years began to consume much more energy from you.
And now that you observed yourself in the mirror, here on your 75th birthday, did you realize that life had really gone by in the blink of an eye.
Of course 75 wasn’t too old of an age, but now retired and living under the light supervision of your nearly 50 year old daughter, you had long ago realized that the days of wild adventures and endless partying were long over. In a way it was time to start asking yourself if you had lived a life you could be proud of and if you fulfilled the promise you made over 50 years ago.
Honestly, you were unsure, but before you could dwell on your thoughts for any longer, the sound of an argument going on downstairs catches your attention.
“Hand me the phone Jia!” you hear your daughter’s voice yell across the room as you made your way into the living room.
“I said no! I’m not twelve anymore, you can’t just make me hand you my things whenever you want,” Jia scoffs in return, adamant on her rebellious stance.
“Considering that I’m the one whose paying that phone bill every month, I wouldn’t exactly call it yours little lady,” Yeojin sternly furrows her brows while her hand continued to remain held out, her patience running on a thin line, “Jia if you don’t give me that phone then—”
“What?” she interrupts, challenging whatever her mother was going to say. With your newly profound headache growing by the second, you grab the keys to your small old Toyota, deciding that you weren’t going to be helping handle this on your birthday.
Their voices, which became nothing more than background noise while you grabbed your winter jacket, were brought back to your attention once you were making your way out the door.
“Mom where are you going?” Yeojin asks before you could run off, “It’s raining and you shouldn’t be driving at this hour of night.”
“And why is that?”
“Because Grandma you’re—” Jia suddenly chimes in, “well you’re um—” old, is what you know your granddaughter wants to say, but out of respect chooses not to.
You sigh, “I’m just going to the diner to grab myself a late night snack while you two continue with your useless arguing. Hopefully when I come back, you two will have realized how pointless these arguments are.”
“Mom—” Yeojin begins, but almost as if a lightbulb went off in her head, she suddenly grabs Jia’s phone while she was distracted in watching you leave, “Go with your grandma,” she commands, and Jia’s eyes immediately go wide.
“Hey you can’t just—” Jia’s about to complain until she sees the firm look on her mother’s face, “But—” she glances in your direction, knowing that just like her mom, she wouldn’t feel too good having you out driving this late at night, especially on a rainy day.
“You cried about getting your permit for months, now is the time to put it to use,” Yeojin sends her knowing look, recalling the number of months that Jia would complain about all of her classmates getting either their permits or license’s while she was still stuck taking the bus.
“Ugh,” she groans, “Fine, grandma wait for me in the car,” she ultimately says. After putting on her shoes, Jia begins to make her way out to the car, but not before her mother stops her midway to tell her to “Drive safe.”
“Mom, I know,” she scoffs, “but don’t expect me to spend hours there or something. We’re strictly going for whatever food she wants and back. No way in hell are we dining in.”
To that, Yeojin laughs. There was no way her mother wouldn’t want to dine in, but deciding she’d let Jia figure that out on her own, instead she says, “Well as long as you listen to whatever your grandma has to say to you then I don’t mind what time you come back.”
“That’s if she doesn’t put me to sleep first,” Jia mumbles to herself, but still loud enough for her mother to hear.
One could say, she wasn’t exactly looking forward to spending one on one time with her grandma, not without her phone at least. Of course that didn’t mean she didn’t love her grandma to death because truly she did, but often she found herself halfway asleep whenever she had long conversations with her. The same old endearing “you and your mother need to learn to communicate” or the “back in my day” conversations were quite repetitive.
“Mm, you need to start putting that attitude of yours under control little lady,” Yeojin shakes her head in disapproval, “I understand that your grandma can be a bit…”
“Boring,” Jia completes the sentence for her.
“Tedious,” Yeojin corrects, “at times, but occasionally she has an interesting story to tell here and there,” she chuckles, “so don’t count her out just yet. You may be surprised with whatever story she has prepared to tell.”
And with that all Jia could do was sigh, preparing for the long night ahead.
“Grandma, we’ve been here for like 2 hours now,” Jia complains, staring at you as you ate your BLT sandwich, the sound of both loud and pleased munches coming out of your mouth, “You’re really telling me you’re not full yet?”
With a mouthful of food in your mouth, you shake your head no. It isn’t until you gulp down your food that you’re able to verbally give a response, “You know I’m a slow eater, plus it’s my birthday. You don’t hear me complain on your birthday, do you?”
To that, Jia remained silent. She guessed you had a point, not like there was much left for an elderly lady like you to do. The least she could do was suck up her complaints, and deal with it. It just sucked that whenever she looked up at the wall clock it seemed like time was moving as slow as a snail.
God, how she should’ve somehow managed to take back her phone. It also didn’t help that those “stories” her mom had mentioned weren’t planning on making an appearance tonight because all you did was silently eat your food and stare out the window.
Honestly, Jia hadn’t expected much but it seemed as if today you were even quieter than usual, not even bothering to make the small conversation you usually did, like asking her how school was going or if she had a boyfriend yet (not that she ever responded truthfully). So in short, you were doing absolutely nothing to appease Jia’s boredom.
All Jia could do was tap her nails against the old diner’s table and observe the other late night foodies around you two.
The first person she noticed was a middle aged man who was eating a burger along with a strawberry shake. Based on his tiresome appearance and the hat he wore, she could only assume that he was most likely a trucker who needed to make a pit stop.
The second person she noticed was not a single person, but a group of three. A father, a mother, and their little daughter. The sight of them tugging slightly at her heart strings, reminding her of a time in her childhood before her parents’ divorce. If only she had appreciated those moments a little more while they were happening.
Deciding that she wasn’t in the mood for nostalgic sulking, she instead focused her attention on the last set of people in the diner. A couple, who was only a couple of feet away from you two, seated in one of the booths rather than at a table like Jia and you.
The young man, who Jia assumed was in his mid 20′s, was seated with a woman who was just as good looking as him. The two of them sat facing across from one another rather than besides each other, the serious look on their faces clearly signaling that whatever they were talking about was of importance.
It wasn’t until she took a clearer look at the woman that she realized she was crying, the sounds of her whimpers becoming clearer once she had taken note of the woman’s disheveled appearance. It looked like she had been crying for hours, her hand holding onto the man’s at the center of the table as if begging him to stay…
“Yejin we just can’t be together anymore,” Jia overhears the man say, and it’s only then that she realizes that the woman is begging him to stay.
“Jimin, all I’m asking is why?” she hears the woman plead, her voice sounding weak and defeated, “I just— I just don’t understand—” she manages to stutter the sentence out, “Does it have to do with what you were telling me the other night? About feeling incompenent with your career?”
He vigorously shakes his head no, prepared to deny the accusation, “No—”
But she’s quick to cut him off, “Because if it is,” she squeezes his hand tighter, “I already told you I don’t care. I don’t care if you’re the poorest or richest man on the planet, okay? As long as I’m with you, I just don’t care,” she repeats, “You’re my person Jimin,” the woman, who Jia now identified as Yejin, with whatever energy she had left, forced a small smile to grace upon her lips.
A small smile that spoke nothing but genuine love for the man across from her, but with eyes that were desperately hoping for a small sign that the man in front of her would break, “You’re all I have.”
The man, Jimin, instead of reciprocating the warm gesture, pulls his hands away, forcing himself to be the ultimate bad guy in this story.
This was for the best he reasoned with himself, not for him, but for her.
The woman in front of him who he loved so much that he couldn’t bear the thought of denying her a future where she’d have to worry everyday about what their future held, even if it meant not being with him,
“It’s for that reason that we can’t….” he clears his throat, “After tonight we’ll be nothing more than strangers.” he says in a voice that hid any feeling of despair he felt, saving the emotion for later when he was by himself.
“Please,” her voice breaks, “Jimin please,” a single teardrop falls from her eye, “Our future, it'll be worth it, I promise. Every stupid stubborn inch of it because as long as I’m by your side we’ll get through anything. And when we’re old and gray we’ll laugh about this stupid conversation—”
“Yejin—”
“No,” Yejin shakes her head vigorously, desperately fighting tooth and nail for her boyfriend of 7 years and her childhood friend of even more, the person she thought she’d been through it all with, “I refuse to—”
“Yejin!” he firmly interrupts her before she could continue, unsure of just how much more he could hear, “Look at me.” Fuck Yejin. Don’t do this to me. Just accept it., was all he could think at the moment, “I’m—” for a second he struggles to say the words, struggles to officially shatter the heart that had trusted him enough to show itself completely bare, “I’m doing this for me. I’m choosing me. And I don’t know what else I can say or do for you to realize that,” how disgusting it felt to spew the lies out of his mouth.
And it was once he said those words, that Yejin no longer fought against what was happening. It was then that Jimin knew, she had finally accepted it.
The two sat there in silence for what felt like an eternity, until Yejin grabbed her keys from the table, mustering the courage to be the first one to leave, but not before planting a soft kiss on top of Jimin’s head, a final gesture of good bye.
Jia, who’d witness the whole heartbreaking scene play out in front of her, struggled to tear her eyes away. But it was once she did, that she had noticed she wasn’t the only one who had paid attention to the break up.
Watching the couple, you looked as if you’d seen a ghost, truly at a loss for words. Never did you imagine you’d witness history repeat itself.
A voice breaks you away from your thoughts, “Grandma, are you okay?” Jia warily asks, concerned with why you looked so shocked.
“Oh,” you blink rapidly as if being brought back to reality, “Yeah, it’s just—” you glance at the booth once again, watching the man sulk in his seat.
His head was leaned against the glass window, dazedly looking at the view outside. By now his eyes were puffy, the emotions he had kept bottled in, now manifesting itself in the salty tears that were now silently falling down his face.
And before you could think twice, you grabbed the extra sandwich you had ordered and began to walk towards his booth, Jia following behind with a shocked expression.
“Grandma, what are you doing?!” she asks in a panicky tone, but before she could stop you from doing anything, you were already standing beside the booth the man was in.
The dirty-blonde haired man turns his attention towards the two of you, a worn out expression on his face.
“You seem like you could use this,” you offer him the sandwich with a warm smile on your face, “a young man like you shouldn’t be in such distress, or else you’ll end up with wrinkles like mine,” you try to joke around, an attempt to brighten the mood.
He lets out a forced chuckle, showing you that despite his down mood, he was still a very polite young man through and through.
“You don’t mind if we…” you stare at the seat across from him, signaling that you were hoping to sit.
He looks as if he wants to say no, shyly avoiding eye contact for a moment, unsure of how to reject a kind old woman.
“Oh it’s just that um—” but before he could spew out an excuse, you were already making yourself comfortable in the booth, your granddaughter hesitantly sitting in the spot next to him, still giving you the “What are you doing” eyes.
He feigns an awkward smile, scolding himself for being so timid. It wasn’t that he didn’t appreciate the kind gesture, for any other day he would’ve been more than happy to receive a free BLT sandwich and make conversation with an elder, but tonight … well tonight he just wanted to sulk in his own misery.
“So what is a young man like you doing out here so late at night?” you ask, the closed eye smile on your face causing your wrinkles to protrude.
He remains silent, unsure of what to respond with, “Was that your girlfriend just now who left?” you boldly ask, the phrase “having a filter” clearly not in your dictionary.
“Grandma!” Jia frantically says, “Sir I’m sorry, we’ll leave now,” she forces an awkward laugh, now getting up from the booth, “she can be a bit pushy—”
“She’s my ex now,” he surprisingly answers, catching not only Jia but himself off guard.
You on the other hand remain with a warm sympathetic smile on your face.
Honestly, he wasn’t sure what came over him to be so straightforward. He’d been holding so much in for so long, he figured that maybe it wouldn’t hurt to talk to a random old lady and her granddaughter for a night. Not like he’d ever see them again, right?
Letting out a bitter scoff directed at himself, he continues, “I broke up with her just now Mrs—”
“Ms. y/l/n,” you correct him, “and this is my granddaughter Jia,” you signal to Jia to sit back down, and she watches the two of you with wary eyes, confused by the sudden conversational exchange between the two of you.
Hmm, well she did want to know why he broke up with his girlfriend, so maybe it wouldn’t hurt to just sit and listen for a bit. Shaking his hand, she seats herself once more.
“You don’t seem too happy about your break up, for someone who did the breaking that is…” you lightheartedly comment, secretly analyzing his tense posture. Though relaxing just a bit, it was clear that he still didn’t feel completely comfortable sharing the details of his private life. It wasn’t surprising really, you were nothing more than a stranger. It wasn’t like you expected him to be so open, not right away at least, “you don’t mind me asking why?”
“Because—” he pauses for a moment, trying to find the right words, “we—” he sighs, holding back, “we just weren’t meant to be,” he ultimately says with a small sad smile on his face.
You stare at him for what feels like an eternity, a frown now on your face.
“And what makes you say that?” you ask.
He gulps, the intense stare from both you and Jia now making him nervous, “Because she’s destined for greatness,” he longingly states, “and I was nothing more than an obstacle along the way even if she didn’t realize it,” he looks down at the table, “Because all I want in this world is for her to live a long happy life, a life where she can do anything she pleases whenever she wants, without a worry in the world,” he concludes, now sporting a dull expression.
“You—” you clench your teeth, almost looking at him in disgust, “You stupid boy,” you harshly mumble, but still loud enough for both him and Jia to hear.
“Grandma!” Jia’s eyes widen, taken aback by your sudden rude remark, but all you can do is continue to stare at the man in front of you, a pained expression on your face. Almost as if you wanted to cry.
Jimin on the other hand didn’t know what to make of your words. Was he offended? No, not really. Surprised? Couldn’t say he was. Was it deserved? He’d like to think so. “Look—” he’s about to say something until you interrupt him.
“What about you?” you demand pointedly, “Don’t you care about what you want? What about your happiness?” you feel your upper lip tremble along with a rush of emotions that you were sure you hadn’t felt in years.
Anger. Sadness. Fear.
Everything you had kept bottled in for so long was beginning to make its appearance all because you witnessed this young man break up with his girlfriend.
“Grandma I think we should g—”
“No,” you firmly state, your voice slightly trembling, “I’m not going to let it happen again, I can’t,” a single tear falls from your face as you come into eye contact with the young man. God, he looked so much like him.
Wiping the tear away, you quickly compose yourself, “I’m going to tell the two of you a story,” you point towards the boy, “and you better listen good and well,” you turn to your granddaughter, “you too little lady because it’s a lesson that can be learned by anyone.”
Her face twists to one of skepticism, but she silently nods her head, deciding she wasn’t going to push your buttons for she had never seen you act like this before. Jimin does the same as well, now fearing getting on your wrong side.
“Good,” you let out a deep breath of air, unsure of where to start.
This was the first time in your life that you were telling someone absolutely everything, and never had you imagined it’d be in this exact diner with some random stranger (who you’d just happen to be a first hand witness of his breakup) and your granddaughter.
But a part of you couldn’t help but think that maybe …just maybe it was meant to be this way. That coming to this diner and witnessing what you’d just seen was the universe’s way of telling you that just because your fate was already sealed, didn’t mean you couldn’t change someone else’s. And so you continue, “So I guess…” you pause, “I guess we should start at the beginning.”
“It was the year 1992, Nirvana had just released their all too famous album ‘Nevermind’ months prior to the new year, marking the first shift that we’d see in pop culture during the 90’s. People my age were beginning to slowly throw away their mousse bottles and bright colored outfits and opting in for a more toned down look of mom-jeans and oversized band shirts.
I had just turned 17 at the time and moved here to the city of Gwacheon because of my dad’s job. You wouldn’t believe me but back then this city we know now was a snooze fest. It was nothing but government official buildings and a vacant town center that played outdated music.
I remember being so bitter about moving because like any other teen who moved from one city to another, I had just barely begun to make friends in the city before, only to find out I’d have to leave months later.
I remember having a childish frown on my face the whole ride to the new neighborhood, convinced that by having a fit I’d somehow have my way and go back to the city before, but all in all that’s where the story begins…”
“Mom it’s just not fair!” you complain, crossing your arms while leaning your head against the window, watching as the new town you’d have to learn to call home was nearing with every stop, “I was just beginning to get used to that school, I was even supposed to go on a date!”
Sighing, your mom turns from the passenger's seat to face you, a mix of sympathy and annoyance on her face. It’d been over 4 hours already of hearing you complain in the car, and though your dad had learned to mute you out from the driver’s seat, your mom had to endure each and every complaint.
“Y/N you know your dad’s job requires him to move around from time to time, it’s something out of our control, unless you’re magically going to find him a job out there that pays him as much as his current one then be my guest,” she stares at you knowingly, while you stay silent.
She furrows her brows once she notices something about your appearance, “And what did I tell you about lining your lips like that? And that thing around your neck you’re wearing, you’re lucky it hasn’t suffocat—”
“It’s called a choker and everyone my age wears them mom,” you roll your eyes, wanting this conversation to be over now, despite it being you who started it, “times are changing meaning fashion is too.”
“I thought you kids liked the whole poofy hair and leg warmers kind of stuff. And that one man who's always on MTV,” she twiddles her fingers, trying to remember his name, “you know the one who danced as a zombie in that one video, how does it go again—” she begins to snap her fingers, humming the tune, “cause this is Thriller,” she sings.
“Michael Jackson mom, Michael Jackson,” you answer in annoyance, how the hell did she not know his name?
“Ahh that’s his name,” she laughs, “I’m sorry I’m not so invested in that kind of stuff like you young people are.”
You roll your eyes at this, “Mom I’m sure even grandma knows who Michael Jackson is, you’re just—” but before you could go on any further, the car suddenly comes to a halt.
“And here we are,” your dad finally speaks, an exhausted sigh coming out of his mouth.
The moving truck, which was following right behind you guys had made its stop as well and while your parents immediately stepped out the car to begin attending to the family things, you just looked at your new home in a mix of dismay and surprise. It was definitely a nice home, it’s resemblance to the houses around you being a bit uncanny.
Suddenly, interrupting your deep thinking, your car door opens.
Your mom, who for some reason had a complete 180 turn in attitude, now had an impatient look on her face along with an eyebrow raised. “You’re either going to help your dad take out our things or you’re coming with me to introduce ourselves to the neighbors.”
You stare at her for a moment, thinking to yourself which one you wanted to do. Though still slightly pissed off at your dad for his sudden bomb drop of news that you were all moving, you weren’t exactly in the mood to be social right now, let alone with your new neighbors as it would just ultimately mean having to accept the reality of your situation. “I think I’ll just—”
“Come with me? Great,” your mom answers for you, and you only groan in irritation. You couldn’t say you were shocked as this was only expected from her.
Getting out of the car, you begin to follow her to the next door neighbor’s house on the left side of your new home, your mom having come to the conclusion that the neighbors on the right side must’ve not been home due to the lack of cars in the driveway, “And remember y/n, be nice,” she reminds you, noticing the family SUV parked outside the house, she adds, “and who knows maybe there’s someone your age you can make friends with here.”
You stay silent, not sure if whether finding someone your age living inside the house would be a good or bad thing.
At your last house, there was a girl your exact same age who despite being a very kind person, was just a little too talkative. You’d often randomly find her in your room after learning that your mom let her in because she thought that “that’s what teen girls like to do right? Gossip and cut up some magazines in their room.” Not only would you find yourself getting migraines all the time but you were just too nice to kick her out.
Knock. Knock. Knock.
The muffled sound of what you could only assume were kids running around and things being thrown made you mumble “Oh great,” to yourself. If your mom got friendly with the neighbors like she somehow always did, you’d find yourself babysitting these kids sometime in the future for free.
Minutes pass and nothing.
Personally you took that as a sign of ‘do not disturb’ but your mom, being the relentless person she was, knocked one more time.
“Mom clearly they don’t want to—” and of course just as you were about to convince her to leave, the sound of the kids screaming and laughing comes to a sudden halt and the door swings wide open.
There in front of you stood a middle-aged woman, probably near your mom’s age, who had her hair completely disheveled and one of her kids (a little girl) in her arms while the other (a little boy) gripping onto her right leg like a sloth holding onto a branch.
Despite her stressed appearance, there was still a sense of motherly tidiness to her. “Hello,” your mom greets with a grin on her face, “we just came to introduce ourselves as your new next door neighbors,” she sticks her hand out for the woman to shake, “I’m y/m/n.”
The woman, who looks a bit confused at first, suddenly snaps back to reality with a “Ohh” expression on her face remembering that the house aside from her having its “For Sale” sign removed not too long ago.
She’s quick to shake your mom’s hand in return, “Kim Yerin,” she smiles, “and these are my twins, Minjun and Yeonha. Say hi you two,” she nudges the little girl in her arms who currently had her head rested on her mother’s shoulder while doing the same to the boy wrapped around her leg.
The two, clearly shy in front of strangers, only stare at the two of you with curious eyes, “And this must be your daughter I assume,” the woman faces her attention towards you, who had just been quietly watching the exchange, and waits for you to introduce yourself.
Your face slightly reddens when you feel your mother nudge you, “Y/N,” your introduction comes out as more of a whisper.
“And how old are you?” she curiously asks.
“Just turned seventeen,” you answer, an awkward smile forming on your face.
And as if a lightbulb suddenly went off on her head, a huge grin appears on her face, “You’re my older sons age,” she chuckles, “I don’t know if he’s come back home yet,” she mumbles looking behind her and your nerves begin to rise as you know what she’s about to do, “Seokjin!” she yells loud enough that her voice echoes across the walls of her home, “Give me a moment,” she flashes you two a smile before slightly closing the door, placing her foot in the ridge in order to create a crack so that it wouldn’t be completely closed. “Seokjin!” she calls for her son again, and soon you hear the sound of feet scuffling down the stairs.
“You and that camcorder, we have guests,” you hear her say.
“Say hiiii,” a voice behind the door says and you soon hear the kids giggle.
Yerin opens the door all the way once again, and to your surprise you come to face a tall boy with a camcorder blocking most of his face.
With the lens facing your direction, a whispered “Woah,” then comes out of his mouth. The sound of the lens zooming in causing your eyebrows to furrow in confusion.
“Seokjin,” his mother says more harshly, making him set the camera down and finally reveal his face. And once he did… wow were you surprised.
Though he was sporting what you considered an outdated mullet, the boy was relatively handsome. Currently dressed in a simple black fitted long sleeve shirt and cuffed blue jeans, the young man stuck his hand out for you to shake, a small smile gracing his lips.
“Seokjin but you can call me Jin for short,” he politely introduces himself.
Awkwardly avoiding eye contact, you return the shake, “Y/N.”
“Seokjin, I was just telling y/n here that you two are the same age, maybe you could show her around school this Monday,” she suggests, and your mom is quick to chime in.
“Maybe he can show her around town right now, I’m sure she’d love that, wouldn’t you y/n? That’s if he can of course,” she adds and your eyes widen at the suggestion. Soon it becomes apparent that both you and Jin are feeling flustered at both your mothers’ intrusiveness.
“I d-d—” you stutter.
“Mom…” he begins, his ears reddening. Unbeknownst to you, you’d soon find out that it was something that only occurred whenever he was nervous.
“I’ll even lend you the car this one time,” his mother says, grabbing the keys from the key rack next to door and handing them to him.
A silence momentarily fills the air, awkwardness seeping deep until Mrs. Kim breaks it, “Well go you two! me and Mrs….”
“Y/L/N,” your mom completes for her.
“Will be here drinking tea inside and waiting for you to return,” she gently pushes Jin, who had just put on his Converse, out the door while your mom begins to make her way inside, “And remember to drive safe Seokjin,” she says for a final time before practically slamming the door shut.
The two of you stand there for what feels like forever, staring at anything but each other’s eyes.
“Sorry about that, my mom can be a bit… pushy,” he says, and you want to tell him that it's fine, that your mom is exactly the same, but the words can’t seem to come out. “So…” he mumbles, barely audible to the ear, “Where should we go first?” he asks fiddling with keys in his hands, which only causes you to look at him in confusion. Did he forget you weren’t from here?
“Um…” you say, and slowly he fits the puzzle pieces and realizes what exactly he had asked.
“Oh right,” he awkwardly laughs, scratching the back of his neck as a nervous gesture.
You notice that he’s still holding his camcorder with the other hand, its small red button still glowing, and so out of nowhere you voice the first question that came to your mind.
“Is that thing still recording?” you ask which averts his attention to the grey bulky object in his hand.
“Oh I must’ve forgot to turn it off,” he says, genuinely surprised at his lousy mistake, “My bad,” he adds and you shake your head in a way to say that it was fine. “So … are you hungry?” he kindly asks, and you think to yourself for a moment … the two of you had to go somewhere as it wasn’t like you could just walk right back in and lie.
Gently, you shrug your shoulders, “Yeah I can go for something to eat,” you say, which by now was the longest sentence he’d heard you speak since your introduction to him.
“Great,” he smiles, making his way towards the Hyundai SUV with you following close behind. To your surprise he walks over to your side and opens the door “like a gentleman” before entering the car himself. You mumble a quiet “thank you,” in return.
It’s once he turns on the ignition that you begin to dread the awkwardness inside the car. It wasn’t that you weren’t a social person because truly you were, or at least you always tried to be. You were just never good at initiating conversations first because honestly, who was? The image of your mom immediately came to your mind, but she was different. That lady could spark a conversation with a plant if she really wanted to.
“And here’s the number one song in the country for a third week straight, Emotions by Mariah Carey!” the radio host announces and soon the famous tune begins to play causing Jin to tap his finger against the driving wheel, clearly a fan of the song.
You on the other hand kept your attention on the view outside, noting how boring this town was. From the dull buildings to the empty streets, everything was just so boring. But you couldn’t complain too much, for in a couple of months from now you’d be well off on your way to a college in the city of Seoul, which even though it wasn’t too far from here, it was still much more populated.
“So y/n,” Jin lowers the music down, “where did you move from?” he asks, an attempt at making conversation while driving.
“Buk district in Busan,” you answer in a short and precise manner.
“Oh…” he simply says, “Did you like it over there?”
The delivery of the question causes you to quietly chuckle to yourself, “Yeah I did,” you smile to yourself remembering the friends you had made over there, but almost immediately you remember that any chance of ever seeing them again was long gone, and a frown soon replaces the small smile.
Jin notices the change in facial expression from you, “Well I’m sure you’ll like it around here,” he attempts to comfort you, “I know things may look a little different, hell maybe even a little boring,” he laughs, “but trust me you’ll learn to love this place,” he flashes you a reassuring smile.
To that you could only feign a look of happiness. Not wanting to be a complete asshole, you try and think of something you could ask him, something to spark a conversation like he was trying to.
“It’s Jin right… “ you ask, and to that he nods, “um…” you hum, “how old are your siblings?” you stifly ask, adding an extra comment at the end, “I heard them being pretty um … hyper… before my mom knocked.”
Immediately a smile appears on his face, “Ahh Minjun and Yeonha,” he chuckles, “they’re four but turning five in a couple of months. They’re a handful,” he jokes around, “but we wouldn’t have it any other way,” he says, referring to him and the rest of his family.
“And they’re your only siblings?”
He nods, shrugging while answering, “Yeah, but I always wanted siblings growing up and so to not only get one but two at the same time was pretty cool,” he glances at you, “what about you?”
You nod your head no, “My mom told me that once she had me and dealt with all the sleepless nights due to me crying all the time, that she knew one was enough,” you manage to joke around, the atmosphere in the car now becoming less tense.
“I think my parents thought the same way, but surprises happen,” he laughs, “I mean it’s probably a good thing that I was pretty old when they were born. It meant an extra set of hands to help around the house especially considering my dad’s always working.”
And at the mention of his father you couldn’t help but grow a little curious. He was the only person you hadn’t been introduced to and despite Jin’s mother being an overall gorgeous woman, you assumed that Jin must’ve gotten his most prominent features from his dad as his mother didn’t really resemble him.
“What does he work in?” you continue the flow of the conversation.
“He’s a finance manager for one of the many corporation companies you’ll find around here,” and to that he frowns, “I’m assuming your dad must work in a similar field.”
You look at the window again, “Yeah,” you sigh, “so I guess a lot of people around here work in the business field.”
“I think that’s what causes this place to be a little boring sometimes,” he comments, focusing on the road in front of him, “The lack of creativity,” and by looking at the buildings and overall aura of the town, you understand what he means, “People here already have expectations set on them, and with the pressure of being successful, no one ever really takes the risk of pursuing what they’re really passionate about.”
“Hm,” you hum, unsure of what to add to that, for Jin had hit the nail on its head.
“Butttttt,” he sings, “when you meet people like me you’ll realize not everyone around here is the same,” and with that he piques your curiosity, the car suddenly coming to a halt.
Looking out the window, you notice you’re in front of an old school diner, it’s neon lights currently turned off because of the daylight. Not that it really mattered, as the bright cherry red and blue color painted walls were definitely enough to grab anyone’s attention.
Through the see through glass you notice a group of guys sitting at one of the booths, staring at the two of you as you both exited the car. A mixture of both excitement (which you assumed was directed at Jin) and confusion (which was probably directed on you) on their faces.
“Come on, follow me,” Jin says, leading you inside to the group of boys who looked around your age.
They’re quick to greet Jin, practically shouting his name across the diner. It must’ve been a regular occurrence because none of the waiters even turned to focus their attention on them, “Somehow I knew you guys would be here,” Jin teases.
One of the boys rolls their eyes, “So are you going to introduce us to your new lady friend?” he smiles, and immediately the spotlight is set on you, both you and Jin standing in front of their booth.
“Y/N this is Yoongi,” Jin points at the boy who asked the daring question, “This is Taehyung,” he points at the boy next to him, “and finally this is Namjoon,” he points at the final boy across from them, “You guys this is y/n. She just moved here from Busan.”
“Ahh Busan!” the black haired boy, Taehyung, says excitedly, “I once had a pen pal from there,” he trivially says causing the other boys to laugh.
“Ahh Taehyung and his pen pals,” Yoongi shakes his head, tapping the boys shoulders, “And how did that one out of the many turn out?” he asks in a joking manner, only causing Taehyung to pout, knowing Yoongi was teasing him.
“Hmm,” he groaned, “It’s only been a couple of months without a reply, that doesn’t mean we’re not friends anymore!”
“Yeah Yeah Yeah,” Yoongi rolls his eyes again, scooting to the side to make space for you, “Well don’t just stand there, sit,” he lightly teases, and you glance at Jin as if to confirm if it was okay to do so. He smiles at your shyness, confident that you’d get along with his friends just fine, it’d just take some warming up on your part until then.
Setting his camcorder down on the table, he takes a seat next to Namjoon while you take yours next to Yoongi and Taehyung.
“So y/n,” Namjoon speaks up, “how are you liking it here so far?” But before you can think of a response, Jin answers for you.
“She literally just moved here,” he glances at the clock on the wall, “like an hour ago,” he laughs, “I don’t even think she’s unpacked her stuff.”
“Well don’t expect too much,” Yoongi says, contradicting what Jin had told you earlier, “this place is a snooze fest!” he dramatically adds, only causing Jin to nudge him with his leg from under the table, “Hey it's true, if it weren’t for you guys I’d be dying of boredom all the time.”
“Which is exactly why we need to show y/n the best spots in town to visit and how to have some fun,” Jin declares and to that, the boys shrug, not minding the new addition to their group.
“Well wasn’t that easy,” you think to yourself, it seemed making friends wasn’t as hard as you thought it would be.
“As long as you’re not some kind of party pooper then—”
“Like there's parties in town to even poop at,” Taehyung interrupts causing Yoongi to look at him with a “Huh?” expression making everyone including yourself laugh out loud.
“You do realize it’s not literal—” but before he could continue, Yoongi raises his hand to cover his face, “You and that camera Jin,” and immediately you follow suit, having failed to notice that Jin had turned on his camcorder. Taehyung instead of covering his face, poses by flashing two peace signs, while Namjoon flashed his dimpled smile once the camera was pointed to him.
“Ahh why do you feel the need to record everything?” Yoongi asks, still covering his face.
“You’ll thank me later,” Jin says, “Come on y/n say hiiii,” he begins to near the camera to your face.
“Does he always do this?” you ask his friends around him, and to that they nod.
“He says it’s his practice for becoming a director in the future, but….” Namjoon playfully scoffs, “I don’t see the point in recording absolutely everything.”
“Because I want to make sure when I find the project I want to create, I’ll have all the film I need.” Slowly you take your hands off your face once you notice he wasn’t going to relent anytime soon, “Come on, you know you wanna smileeee,” he sings, and slowly but surely you smile indeed. An awkward one, but a smile nonetheless.
“Well cheers to a new friendship,” Taehyung flashes you his signature boxy smile, raising his milkshake drink in the air, Namjoon and Yoongi imitating the action. You and Seokjin on the other hand create an imaginary motion as if you had drink in your hands, grateful for the blossoming friendship in the making.
“After that first day in Gwacheon, Seokjin along with his friends showed me the best spots in town, whether it was somewhere to eat or somewhere to simply get a good view, they were showing me things that proved the boring town to be different than what it seemed.
Seokjin would especially be eager to show me his favorite spots, always recording my reactions to first time meals or whenever he’d show me a new location. When I’d ask him why, he’d tell me it was because it was like watching a kid eat candy for the first time.
Soon I’d find myself hanging out with him the most, I’m not sure if it was because we were next door neighbors or maybe it was because he was my first friend here, but it wasn’t like I was complaining. It seemed as if with every time we hung out, I was learning something new about him, never a day too dull…”
“You’re not even blowing into it,” Jin complains, watching as you blew air into the Mario game cartridge, your face getting red at your serious effort, “Let me see,” he says, but to that you stubbornly refuse, continuing to blow heavy puffs of air into it.
For the past hour the two of you had been playing his new Mario game on the Nintendo SNES, but out of nowhere the game completely blacked out.
Suspecting that there must have been built-up dust in the cartridge, you took it as your responsibility to blow air into it.
“Fine,” you hiss, passing him the game.
“Ah don’t be like that either,” he teases, squeezing your cheek with his hand.
“Hey!” you cry out and he raises his hands to his defense.
“Sorry I can’t help it,” he laughs, “they’re just so…” he pauses, “squeezable?”
You flip him off, only making him laugh even more, “Just fix the game already,” you mumble, not actually offended, but pretending to be which he of course was used to by now.
Knock. Knock.
“Seokjinnieeee!” the sound of his younger sister’s voice, Yeonha, fills the room. Immediately she goes to tackle him, and Jin (pretending that she was stronger than him) playfully throws himself on the floor only causing her to go into a fit of giggles.
Then out of nowhere you feel tiny arms wrap themselves around your shoulders, “Y/Nieeee,” Minjun blitzes you from behind, a grin now appearing on your face.
With his arms still wrapped around your shoulders, you get up from the floor and begin to run around the room, pretending to be an airplane soaring across the sky.
“Do that too! Do that too!” Yeonha commands Seokjin, forcibly wrapping her arms around his very broad shoulders.
And soon the two of you find yourselves going at “war” with one other, purposely missing each other whenever it’d look like you two would crash as a scare effect for the kids.
By the time you two were all done, you were out of breath and completely exhausted. “Again, again, again!” you hear the two kids squeal, but you were just way too tired to go at it a second time.
Feigning a sad expression on your face, you say, “I’m sorry, I have to be back for dinner soon at my house, but next time I see you I promise you we’ll do that again for you guys.”
Both of the kids, with a saddened expression on their faces, simultaneously go “Aww.” but completely understand, knowing you were never one to falsify your promises.
“Wait you do?” Seokjin asks, completely believing your lie. Glaring at him, you wink at him in a knowing way, and though it takes him a while, he quietly says “Ohh.” once he understands. Scratching the back of his neck, he says, “How bout I walk you out haha,” he innocently smiles with his eyes closed.
“Byeeee Y/N,” the kids say, their attention already on something else.
Waving goodbye, you and Jin make your way downstairs, greeted by his mom, who had used to the time that you two spent playing with kids to make dinner,
“Already leaving Y/N?” she asks when she spots your backpack in your hand, “I made japchae, I’m sure your mom wouldn’t mind you staying for dinner,” she kindly suggests, but you politely nod your head no.
“It’s fine Mrs. Kim,” you say, “I don’t want to lessen the servings any more than I should.”
“You sure I can always—” she’s about to say something until she meets Jin’s expression, which was one of panic. Subtly he was nodding his head in a way to say that she should drop it, not only his ears, but his face becoming red. Softly chuckling to herself, she drops the subject, “Ahh well have a good night y/n.”
“Goodnight Mrs. Kim,” you dismiss yourself, Jin following right behind you as you make your way out the door.
“Whew I sure am tired,” you say once you hear the door behind you close, now standing on his front porch, the sun beginning to set, “We didn’t even get to work on our calculus homework,” you mention, feigning a chuckle.
Jin shrugs, “I doubt we were gonna work on it either way,” he laughs changing the topic, “So y/n um…” he pauses, feeling a lump in his throat form as he nervously rocked back and forth, “I’ve been wanting to ask you something I just don’t know how you’ll react…”
You look at him with a genuine clueless expression on your face. Moments of silence pass before you respond, “Well go on ahead,” you laugh, “you know you can tell me anything,” you smile at him.
And for a moment it feels as if the words can’t come out, the fear of being denied overwhelming the feeling of hope, “Um well…” he gulps, “you know it’s been a couple of months since you moved here and well…” he avoids eye contact with you, “I feel like I see you all the time…” he continues, and for a small second you become scared … Did you do something? Did he no longer ever wanna see you again? With that thought, you feel your stomach drop, “And well I wanted to tell you that I—”
“Oh y/n honey, you forgot your notebook!” Jin’s mom suddenly opens the door, interrupting the moment and catching the both of you by surprise.
Jin immediately shoots his mom a “What are you doing?” look, but it seems like she didn’t catch onto it as she continued having a huge smile on her face. Oh what a kind … oblivious … woman she could be sometimes.
“O-oh,” you stutter, still in a state of surprise at her sudden intrusion, “Um thank you Mrs. Kim, um I should get going!” you awkwardly laugh, “Um I’ll see you at school tomorrow Jin!” you wave goodbye, practically running back to your house. The last thing you hear before closing your own door was the sound of Jin groaning, “Moooom!”
“Ah y/n you made it just in time for dinner,” your own mother greets you, “For a moment I thought you’d spend dinner with the Kims’ for another night,” she teases, causing a ferocious blush to appear on your cheeks.
“What makes you say that?” you mumble while avoiding eye contact, only causing her to send you a knowing look.
Deciding she’d play along with your oblivious act this once, she shrugs, “Hmm I don’t know, maybe because there’s a special someone you like in that house of theirs.”
Your blush deepens.
“Not true,” is all you can muster, “We’re just close friends, that’s all,” you state, but deep down you knew you could only wish for more.
“Mmm well y/n, time is ticking,” she playfully sings, “if you don’t confess soon, who knows when you’ll get the chance once you’re off at college. Just ask your dad, he had to wait 4 years until I came back to our hometown to confess. Isn’t that right y/f/n?” she turns to your dad, who was currently watching Cheers on the television.
Getting up from the couch, he makes his way over to you two, “What’s this about a boy I’m hearing?” he turns on his “Protective Dad” persona.
To that, you roll your eyes, “Dad,” you laugh as he ruffles your hair, placing a kiss to your forehead, “I need to go do my homework,” you announce, needing an excuse to get to your room and out of this conversation.
Your mom narrows her eyes at you, knowing exactly what you were doing but choosing to act dumb about it, “Then what are you doing here young lady, go get to it!” she commands, watching you immediately turn and make your way up the stairs.
“Ah kids these days,” your mom says under her breath, shaking her head in amusement, silently rooting for the two of you.
“I wouldn’t find out that Jin was trying to confess to me that night until a couple of years later in some random conversation, and when I tell you there were several other attempts on both his part and mine to confess, I really mean it. But it was almost as if the universe was waiting for the right moment to let it happen. I just never would’ve thought that the moment would be one so …. unexpected ….”
“So how is he?” you ask Jin’s mother, placing the care basket you made for Jin on his dining table.
“Well you know it is,” she laughs, “no parent really wants to see their kid high off of anesthesia, especially because he’s just been talking complete nonsense for the past hour and refusing to take a nap. But I prefer this than having him walk around with his wisdom teeth aching him.”
You nod your head in understanding, “You don’t mind if I—” and she nods her head yes, understanding what you were insinuating.
“Go for it,” she smiles, “he’ll probably scold me tomorrow for allowing you to see him in that state, but I’m sure he’ll get over it,” she chuckles.
And without a moment of hesitation, you make your way up the stairs and into his room, the first thing you hear is your name being loudly shouted.
“Y/N!” he slurs out your name, his high pitched laughter following right after.
A grin immediately appears on your face as you watch the boy who even though was usually in a joking mood most of the time, now had that same mood heightened because of the anesthesia.
You take a seat on the corner of his bed, “How are you feeling Jin?” you ask, genuinely wanting an answer.
He shoots you a toothy grin and gives you not one, but two thumbs up, “I’m feeling amaaaazinnggg,” he sings, “especially now that you’re here,” he dramatically winks.
You feel your face redden, “This is the effects of the anesthesia,” you tell yourself, not allowing yourself to have false hope.
“Y/N Y/N Y/N,” he hums, “you’re so prettyyyyyy,” he stammers his words, his swollen cheeks making it hard to take him seriously.
“Really? You think?” you go along with him, to which he nods.
“Veryyyyy,” he adds, “too bad I can’t completely see you!” he exclaims, only causing your brow to quirk in confusion.
“What do you mean?”
“I can’t see you!” he repeats in a sardonic tone, almost as if you were dumb for not understanding. It isn’t until you notice that the bangs of his mullet, which was usually parted, were now prickling at his eyes, probably causing his view of you to be blocked by certain strands of hair.
Laughing to yourself, you grab one of the hairpins you had on and scoot closer to him, carefully clipping his bangs to the side, “Ta da,” you giggle at Jin’s childlike expression, “Now you can see me,” you say.
“Now I can see you,” he repeats in awe, and maybe it was because of the effects of the anesthesia but for some reason you looked much more ethereal than usual. Suddenly, out of nowhere Jin grabs his camera from the bed stand, and you look at him in amazement.
You let out a breath of disbelief, “How is it that even when you’re high off of anesthesia, you still somehow manage to pull out that camera of yours?” you ask him.
“Because y/n, 50 years from now the world needs to know how pretty you areeeee,” he looks at you like a lovestruck fool, his eyes halfway closed as he points the lens in your direction.
“Who would’ve thought that Jin could be such a flirt?” you think to yourself.
“I’m not!” Jin pouts, and it’s only then that you realize you must’ve said the thought out loud, “I’m only flirty with you because I like youuuuu,” he gushes.
“Jin you don’t know what you’re saying,” you blink slowly, not sure whether to believe the words coming out of his mouth.
“Oh but I do!” he barks back like a toddler, “I’ve been trying to confess to you for sooooooo long but I get interrupted EACH. AND. EVERY. TIME,” he complains, and suddenly you feel your heart pound ten times faster, an idiotic smile now forming on your face, “like seriously, every time I get the courage to finally fess up, something just has to happen,” he rambles on, now turning off the camera, something you take note of.
Affectionately, you play with some of the strands of his hair from the back, watching him yawn in the process, “Come on silly boy, I think it’s time for you to sleep,” and surely he does in no time, his soft snores filling the room.
It’s only then that you grab a post-it note from his desk, scribbling something you were sure he’d read the next day. Happily making your way downstairs, excited for what was to come.
That same night when Jin groggily woke up from his nap, he was confused as to why he had a glitter hair pin in his hair, and why his camera had a post-it note attached to it on his wooden desk. Grabbing the camera, he immediately recognized the handwriting.
‘check your footage from yesterday, you can thank me later xx. y/n.’
And it was once he did that he could’ve swore he felt his eyes go as wide as saucers, his mouth gaping completely open. “I-I confessed,” he says to himself, unsure of whether he really believed it or not, “I confessed!” he repeats to himself, this time much more confident and enthusiastic about it.
Deciding he had no time to waste, he quickly ran down his stairs, his mom confusingly staring at him as he began to grab his jacket and shoes, “And where do you think you’re going?” she asks.
“Mom, I confessed!” he excitedly shouts before slamming the door behind him shut, ready to knock on your door.
Knock. Knock. Knock.
“Oh Jin!” your mother greets him, amused by his swollen right cheek, “What a surprise,” she chuckles.
“Hello Mrs. Y/L/N,” he respectfully greets, “any chance y/n’s here?” he politely asks, hoping you were home.
Based on the excited look on Jin’s face she could only imagine that he had only good news to share, and so she didn’t hesitate to call you down, “Y/N!” she shouts, and as if you were waiting for it, your bedroom door opens without a second even passing.
Quickly you make your way down, your mom already having a sense as to what was going to happen by the excited expression on both of your faces. Closing the door once you made your way out, she immediately presses her ear against it.
“Y/N,” Jin breathes out, “I-I confe-OW,” he loudly groans, completely forgetting about his mouth still being sore from the procedure, only causing you to laugh. Even now the universe was finding ways to delay the inevitable.
“You confessed,” you instead say for him, and he nods excitedly, holding his mouth in pain. But it’s only then that he realizes … just because he confessed didn’t mean you automatically felt the same way.
His face reddens.
Ready to make a dash for it, you grab his hand before he could. A touching smile now on your face, “I like you too,” you say, squeezing his hand in reassurance. And immediately you see the relief wash over him, his tense shoulders relaxing.
“I’d kiss you, but I don’t think I can move my lips,” he manages to mumble out, the sudden jolt of pain minutes earlier now making it hard for him to talk.
You giggle at this, then tippy toeing and placing a peck to his lips, deciding that it’d be enough to satisfy the two of you. And without notice your mom opens the door, making the two of you jump in surprise.
“Awwwww, finally!” she pretends to weep, and you’re quick to furrow your brows.
“Mom!”
“And so that was the exact moment our friendship had officially blossomed into something more… I had officially fallen in love with the boy next door. And so we spent the rest of the school year doing whatever it is high school couples do. The occasional hand holding here and there, the timid kisses, but most importantly… despite there now being a shift in our relationship, we still spoke to one another like the best of friends we were before. Because at the end of the day he was still just the boy next door.
But of course soon we’d find ourselves having to confront the looming topic over our heads … college.”
Knock. Knock. Knock.
The door opens.
“It arrived,” you frantically say to the boy in front of you, an envelope in your hand. He motions for you to come in, his heart now beating as fast as yours.
Sitting down on the dining chair, you watch as he runs up the stairs to his room in order to grab the envelope that had arrived at his house a day prior to yours.
The sealed envelopes, which read ‘Seoul National University” in a big blue font along with its famous logo stamped onto it were now being held by your guys’ jittery fingers.
“When are they getting here?” you ask Jin, who had just seated himself.
Glancing at his watch, he answers, “Any second now,” his foot bounces up and down out of nervousness, “I told them to be here an hour earlier than planned because I knew they’d get here late,” he says, patting himself in the back for his trick.
“Well they need to get here faster,” you complain, tapping your nails against the table.
Knock. Knock. Knock.
“Finally,” you groan, watching the rest of your friends walk into Jin’s kitchen.
“Sorry we caught traffic,” Taehyung lies, munching on his last fry.
You roll your eyes at the poor attempt, ”You’re such a bad liar,” you say, deciding not to press him any further on the issue. “Let’s just get to opening these things.”
The boys nod, taking a final deep breath in, ready to rip open the envelopes.
“Wait,” Jin suddenly demands, “Let me set the camera,” and immediately he’s met with dramatic eye rolls and groans, but you guys allow him to do so nonetheless. “Okay you guys, remember whatever the results are behind these, we all have to promise ourselves that it won’t change anything. It doesn’t make anyone better than the rest, and we’ll all certainly still be friends in college,” he says and you all nod in agreement, for a moment forgetting that whatever the results were inside your envelopes, you’d all still remain friends no matter what.
“Okay, 1..2...3,” you count down, and at the same time you all pull out your decision letters.
“I got in!” Namjoon yells excitedly.
“Me too!” Taehyung says after him, a grin on his face.
“Holy shit, me too,” Yoongi repeats after him.
“Me as well,” Seokjin says nonchalantly, not exactly caring for his acceptance but more about yours as he immediately turns his attention towards you.
Having watched you stay up late studying for the entrance exams for the past couple of weeks, he knew just how nervous you were about these letters and as both your boyfriend and your friend, he couldn’t help but root for you much more than himself.
But it’s once he sees the saddened expression on your face that he knows …
“Y/N…” Taehyung whispers in sadness.
“I—” you slouch your shoulders, looking away from their gazes, “I didn’t get in,” you murmur, your voice signaling that you were on the verge of crying.
Jin is quick to turn off the camera and goes to wrap his arms around you, placing a soft kiss on top of your head and softly rubbing your back in an effort to comfort you. He sends a look to the boys as if to say he thinks it’d be best for them to leave, for now at least.
They nod in understanding, beginning to make their way out until they hear you say “Wait!” and at an attempt to ease the tension, you try and hide the sadness in your voice, “Congratulations, truly,” you send them a weak smile before they leave, and they send you a small smile in return, sad that their friend didn’t get into the college of their dreams.
“Hey don’t cry,” Jin comforts you, giving you more pecks on top of your head, feeling his heart swell more and more by the second.
“I thought I worked so hard,” you sniffle, the tears slowly falling down your cheeks.
“Hey don’t say that! You did work hard princess,” he scolds you, pulling you into a tight hug and tipping your chin up so that he could look at you properly, a soft look on his face while he brushed your hair away from your face, “That stupid school doesn’t know what they’re missing out on, you hear me?” He squeezes your cheek when you don’t reply, “Heyyyyyyyy, don’t ignore meeee,” he teases, placing a soft kiss on your lips.
All you can do is roll your eyes once you feel your cheeks get hot, damn him and his everlasting effect on you. “My dad’s going to be so disappointed,” you mumble, already dreading the conversation. The sole reason you even wanted to get into that school was to impress him, to make him feel that he didn’t have to worry about your future.
“No he’s not,” Jin states in confidence, and you look at him in curiosity, “because your dad is nothing like mine,” he jokes, reassuring you, “Because I’m sure that for both your mom and dad, as long as you’re happy and pursuing whatever it is you want to, they’ll be more than happy to support you along the way.”
“You think so?” you ask him, a small pout on your lips.
“Ah I know so princess,” he gives you a small comforting smile, “Come on let’s watch a movie and eat some popcorn before you go home. I just bought Goodfellas on VHS the other day,” he says, leading you to the living room, the heavy feeling that had been weighing down your chest, not so heavy anymore.
“And so that night I told my parents the decision SNU had made, and just like Jin said they were completely supportive, not even the slightest disappointed. Luckily, the college that did accept me was not at all far away from Seoul National University meaning Jin and I did not have to worry about a ‘long distance relationship’ because trust me, a long distance relationship in the 90s was even ten times more harder to manage than how you kids have it today with your phones.
Honestly, our first year in college passed by in the blink of an eye. I’m not sure if it's because I was always with Jin and our group of friends running around in a big old city with so many more different things to explore, but by the time we reached our second year, we were beginning to ask ourselves where time was going by…. “
“Cheers to our first year!” you and the boys lift up your drinks of Soju, clinking the bottles as a way of commemorating your first successful year in college.
Laughter fills the air while you all talk about the good and the bad of college, from the nightmare drunk stories to typing last minute essays on a jammed computer inside the library. “To think we were all panicking about how we’d do,” Yoongi says, shaking his head.
“I know, but now we have to start declaring our majors soon,” Taehyung mentions, “I still don’t know whether I want to major in sociology or psychology…”
“Me neither, I’ve been leaning towards linguistics,” Namjoon adds, “What about you y/n?” he asks you.
You think about it for a moment before answering, “Engineering Physics.”
“Woah,” Namjoon looks at you in shock, “Good luck to you,” he jokingly scoffs.
You shrug, a certain glimmer appearing in your eyes as you make eye contact with him, “Don’t you find it interesting? The possibilities of there being more than one universe out there, different dimensions, hell maybe even a parallel universe!” you say in excitement, clearly passionate about the field, “Namjoon there’s probably hundreds of you who like to pick their nose just like you!” you throw in the playful jab, making him flip you off while the rest of the boys laugh their asses off.
“What about you Jin?” Yoongi asks his longtime friend, who for some reason tonight was quieter than usual, something clearly on his mind.
And as if brought back to reality he looks at all you with a surprised expression, “O-oh,” he stutters, “um Business Administration?” he says, unconvinced of his own answer.
Yoongi nods his head, “As expected, as expected. Business does run in the family,” and though you know Yoongi meant no harm in the comment, you couldn’t help but notice how tense Jin got after hearing it, as if it only further killed his mood.
“Hey,” you softly whisper into his ear, grabbing his attention while Yoongi begins to talk about something else, “everything good?”
Immediately his expression softens, and he quietly nods yes, not wanting you to worry. But no matter how well Jin thought he was at hiding emotions like sadness or anger from you, any change in his behavior, albeit small or large, was always obvious to you.
Making a mental note to talk to him later, you subtly keep an eye on him for the rest of night, your mind wondering what it could be.
Jin plays with your loose strands of hair while he watches you soundly sleep, your skin warm and slick with the efforts of your earlier endeavors.
It hadn’t been long since he moved into this apartment with Namjoon, and though you weren’t exactly officially living with them, with the number of mornings he’d wake up to having you beside him, he and Namjoon might as well have considered you their third roommate.
Not like Joon was complaining, the breakfasts he’d wake up to you making completely cancelling out the occasional use of his ear plugs for nights like these…..
Trailing his fingers across your shoulders, he traces the curves of your collarbones, savoring the moment. It wasn’t until he suddenly heard you speak that he realized you weren’t asleep at all, “Can’t sleep?” you ask, opening your eyes.
“Y/N, go to sleep, it’s late,” he mumbles in the darkness.
Ignoring him, you move to make yourself more comfortable, “Something’s bothering you,” you simply state, and that he can’t deny.
“Y/N... “ he’s about to begin, but you weren’t having any of it.
“Seokjin,” you say his full name, something you’d rarely done since you met him, “you know you can tell me,” you reassure, squeezing his hand, “it’s my job to listen,” you add for extra comfort.
And for a moment he looks as if he’s contemplating something, not really accustomed to being the one talking.
Especially because if you were to ask anyone who’s ever known Jin, then they’d tell you they’d almost never seen the man in a bad nor sad mood.
Because for the sake of others, Jin had always been the one to remain cheerful when things were bad, the one to crack jokes even whenever he felt down, the one who liked imitating Mariah Carey’s whistle notes in the car while driving, the person everyone could always rely on whether it be for laughs, advice, or just anything.
It was just who Jin was as a person.
He sighs once he’s made his decision to tell you, “You know how we were talking about declaring majors and stuff tonight?”
Silently, you nod your head, and he sighs again, “Well I was thinking about something the other day…” he pauses, shifting his body to the side, leaning his head against his hand and now completely facing you, “Remember that first conversation we had in my mom’s car the day you moved into town, when I was taking you to diner?” He asks the rhetorical question, continuing with his thoughts, “How I said that people usually have expectations already set on them and with the pressure of being successful, no one ever truly takes the risk of pursuing what they’re passionate about?”
You nod again, wondering where this was going.
“It wasn’t until earlier this month when I revisited that conversation in the midst of everyone talking about declaring majors and their future careers that I realized that really I was just talking about myself,” he sighs, and suddenly everything becomes clearer to you, and a look of understanding becomes apparent on your face.
He gulps before continuing, “For so long I’ve been so scared to seriously pursue directing and the world of entertainment all because of my fear of disappointing my dad because Yoongi’s right … business does run in my family and I don’t know if it’s cause I’m the oldest but there’s always been an expectation set on me. An expectation to be the best. An expectation to be successful.”
Slowly, you begin to run your hands through his hair, allowing him to talk as much as he wanted because you knew this was one of the very rare moments that he was going voice everything he had been thinking for so long.
“And so when I hear people like you or Taehyung or even just classmates talk so passionately about what they wanna do in the future I can’t help but wish I had that same courage to to pursue what I want. I mean hell, look at Yoongi pursuing a career in music and producing. I like business, I do, but it’s just not for me, and now just like how you and the rest of the boys are pursuing your dreams, I wanna pursue mine, no matter what it takes. For the first time in my life I want to be 100% selfish, I want to choose me.”
He remains silent after finishing his little speech, a signal that he now wanted your input. He needed to hear something, anything, for he was tired of bearing the weight of his worries by himself.
Gathering your thoughts, you give him a kiss to the lips before continuing, your heart swelling for the man in front of you, “Jin if you want to pursue your dreams then do it,” you grab his hand and kiss his knuckle, “Because I’m just as sure you’ll be successful in the future, plus it’s better to live a life without regrets than with…” you pause, “But I also don’t think it’d be right if I wasn’t rational with you. You’re gonna have to tell your parents, and it’s also important to know that like any other career there is a risk of not making it because at the end of the day that’s how life works and sometimes things are just out of our control… but the real question is if you’re willing to accept it if it happens…”
Jin breaks away his eye contact with you, your words sadly ringing true, “Hey,” you turn his head with your hand in order to have him face you again, now resting your hand on his cheek, “Everything will be okay,” you reassure, “I’ll be with you every step of the way,” you kiss his other cheek.
To that, he smiles.
“Tomorrow,” he randomly says, only causing you to be confused until he continues, “Tomorrow I’m going home and telling my parents what I wanna do. And you’re coming with me… for moral support that is,” he shoots you a grin, and for a moment your eyes are wide in surprise because well… you certainly weren’t expecting him to do it so soon, “Please?” he pouts, making you roll your eyes playfully.
“Like you have to ask,” you say, tightly wrapping your arms around his broad shoulders and burying your face in the crook of his neck, a good night’s sleep following soon after.
“If only we had known things weren’t going to go down as smoothly as we thought it was…”
“Dad you don’t get it…” Jin pushes his hair back with his hand, a sign that he was stressed.
His dad scoffs, “What’s there not to get? You’re choosing something that’s a complete risk over something that has a future, a guaranteed solid one at that. Let’s be feasible here Seokjin...”
Silently you watch the exchange between father and son. Yeah, the two of you knew that there’d be some backlash to Jin’s decision from his parents (if not only his father) but to be here for over 3 hours now, watching the two go back and forth wasn’t what anyone had expected. Neither side relenting on why the other was wrong. But time was ticking, and soon one would pop, you just hadn’t expected it to be Jin first.
“I just can’t dad!” he shouts, interrupting his dad, his voice echoing across the walls. Momentary silence followed, enough to hear a pin drop fall, “I-I just can’t,” Jin’s voice breaks, his eyes desperately pleading for his dad to just once in his life understand.
A scornful laugh comes out of his dad’s mouth before he exhales a big deep breath, “Okay,” he monotonously states, and for a moment a flicker of hope appears in both Jin’s and your eyes, but as fast as it came, it left even quicker, “You can pursue your little venture into the world or entertainment and directing, but just know I never agreed to paying for a degree in Film, I agreed to one in Business. And so if you really want it that bad, it’s coming out of your pocket,”he declares, shocking everyone in the room.
“Sungjin,” Jin’s mother, who had only watched the exchange like you the whole time, finally speaks up, in just as much as shock as you and Jin. Paying for college out of his pocket? That was almost impossible.
Jin’s father raises his hand, as if to let him continue, “Be grateful I’m still agreeing to pay for that apartment of yours, I’m not cruel enough to let my own son jump from place to place.”
Jin shakes his head, “No,” he says, and you look at him confused, “I’ll pay for my own apartment as well as everything else you help pay for,” with a hardened scowl now on his face he continues, “and I’ll prove you wrong,” he declares.
His father could only look at him with skepticism until his own expression followed his son’s. The two really were two sides of the same coin.
“Come on y/n let’s go,” he scoffs, getting up from his chair and going to kiss his mom on the cheek, you politely (but also awkwardly) dismiss yourself, following him outside and into his car.
“Why the hell did you do that?” you finally ask, one of the many questions you had running in your head, “and how the hell do you plan on paying for everything out of your own pocket?”
“Because y/n,” he runs his hand through his hair, turning on the car in order to let the ignition warm up, “I want to prove him wrong,” he repeats his reasoning from earlier, shrugging his shoulders in the process, “I’ll just pick up extra hours at work, holiday season is starting soon and my manager being the lazy man he is would rather overwork an employee aka me than hire someone new.”
You pout, “Does that mean no more movie nights?” you whine, making him laugh.
“We’ll still have them princess,” he gives you a peck on the cheek, “Just not as frequent that’s all,” he then follows the kiss with a squeeze on the cheek, “meaning we have to savor them more,” he concludes, the two of you well on your way home, a happy couple once in love.
“This …. This is where our story slowly begins to take a bit of shift. It’s where the bright flowers we once held onto so tightly begin to slowly wilt when faced with the real world, where destiny and fate cross roads, creating and molding choices both within and out of our control…”
“Place your tassels to the left...” the students in the arena follow the command. “and congratulations to the new class of 1996!” the chancellor of SNU announces, and soon the sight of graduation caps being thrown left and right follows.
You feel your throat go sore from the amount of cheering you’re doing on the stands, watching as Jin and your group of friends hug in celebration, following with excited waves directed towards you and Jin’s mother along with his siblings.
Jin’s father, who claimed he was too busy with work, wasn’t able to make it, not that it was much of a surprise to anyone. Ever since Jin declared his financial independence from his dad, their relationship wasn’t exactly a favorable one, not that there was ever much to work with.
But in the end Jin understood his father and he understood why he couldn’t be supportive because like any other parent all Jin’s father wanted was to ensure Jin lived a successful life where he wouldn’t have to worry about finances and whether there’d be food on the table albeit it be for only himself or his future family.
The class song, “Fantasy” by Mariah Carey begins to play, and you feel your stomach cramp at laughing so hard because of Jin’s sudden dancing, the boys soon following his movements. You really had to take him to a Mariah Carey concert soon.
“Let’s go meet them in the parking lot,” Jin’s mother shouts over the chaos of people leaving the bleacher stands.
You nod, following her lead, all while helping Minjun and Yeonha (who were now 10) not get lost in the crowd. Once you make it to the parking lot, you find Jin, who had made it there before you all, and immediately you run to hug him, his siblings following suit.
His mom who's holding his famous old camcorder, records the moment, but once Jin spots it, he’s quick to cover his face by nuzzling his head into the crook of your neck. “How is it that the person always recording things, hates being recorded?” you chuckle, trying to push him off so that he’d have no choice but to be recorded.
“Mm don’t forget being pictured,” he mumbles, maneuvering you in a way that he could reach the camera in his mom’s hands, tackle her into a big hug and successfully get her to turn off the camera.
“Congratulations my Seokjin,” his mom kisses his cheek, ruffling his hair like she did when he was a kid.
Jin, who ditched the mullet about two years ago, now sported a more clean cut look, resembling a comma in the front while still a little lengthy from the sides. In a way it made him look a bit more youthful, not that he had to worry, for that man truly did not age. You were sure that even now at 21 years of age, Jin was going to look like this for the rest of his life because 4 years ago at age of 17 he looked exactly the same. You could only hope your own genes did the same.
“Thanks mom,” he smiled.
“Now for a picture,” she said while pulling out a Kodak disposable camera from her purse, but before she could even attempt at taking a picture, Jin was already getting into his car.
“Ahh later mom, let’s just go eat for now,” he announces, “The graduation boy is really hungry,” he gives her the puppy dog eyes before entering the car.
She rolls her eyes, “Fine. We’ll meet you two over there,” she says, “Come on you two,” she motions to the two twins to follow her back to her car.
“I still can’t believe you wanna drive all the way out to that old diner in Gwacheon as a way of celebrating your graduation,” you say as Jin reverses out of his parking spot, one hand on the steering wheel while the rest of his body was turned to make sure that no cars were passing.
Once he was safely out of the parking lot, he then replies, “Because y/n, there’s nothing better than a nice BLT sandwich on a Saturday night, don’t you think?”
“They’re not even all that—” you’re about to lecture him until he interrupts.
“Ah Ah ah, I’m the graduation boy,” he pouts while driving, “We went all the way to Itaewon to try that Italian food you wanted so bad when it was your graduation day, and you didn’t hear me complain.”
You narrow your eyes at him, damn him …
“Mm,” you mumble.
“Oh I love this song!” Jin, with his right hand, turns up the volume to the radio, “Californiaaaa loveeee,” he repeats after the robot, the music now blasting in the background as he gets on the highway, now on your way back home.
“Passing” you the imaginary mic in his hand, he expects you to sing with him and for a moment you stare at him with a deadpan look until of course you smile at his foolishness, “California knows how to party,” you sing, passing him the “mic”.
“In the cityyyyy of LA,” he continues along, and it goes like this the whole car ride. The two of you going back and forth singing songs from famous artists such as the Backstreet Boys, Boyz II Men, Radiohead, Nirvana, and of course Jin’s favorite, Miss Mariah Carey.
And just like that the day goes by in the blink of an eye, from eating at the diner with his mom and siblings, to visiting your parents until finally the two of you found yourselves sitting on your porch just like the good old days.
Resting your head against his shoulder, both of you stare at the sky above in silence, the stars out and shining bright tonight.
“We really graduated,” you say in disbelief, breaking the silence. Jin turns his attention to you, a small smile on his face.
“Crazy huh?” he interlocks his hand with yours, kissing the knuckles of it, “Time went by in the blink of an eye, and now we’re officially in the real world. Nothing but a tiny speck in such a large universe, almost like the stars,” he chuckles looking back up to the sky, and you gaze at him with a soft look in your eyes. If only he knew how much brighter he shined compared to them.
“Jin…” you randomly say, “I love you,” and though he’s heard it come out of your mouth many many times before tonight, each and every time he did hear it, his heart swelled the same as the first.
Unlocking his hand from yours, he instead wraps his arm across your shoulder, gently bringing you closer to him, enough that you could even hear the sound of his heart beating. Something that not even a video camera could capture. This was a memory you two would just have to remember on your own when you are both old and grey.
“I love you too princess,” he whispers, “I love you too,” he repeats to himself, “You know, I’ve been thinking these days about our future...” you look up at him from your position, childlike curiosity now shown across your face, “I feel like since we’ve always lived moment to moment since we’ve met, I’ve never really asked you…” he pauses debating whether to ask, “what kind of future do you want?”
Softly chucking, you shrug, “You really wanna hear it?” you ask, and he furrows his brows, almost offended you’d even ask, but rather than scold you he simply nods, “Hmm..” you think for a moment, “I picture us both having successful careers and living in the big city while we’re at our peak, getting married on a whim and occasionally traveling the world in search of an adventure,” you pause, “but when the time comes to finally relax, then I’d want to move back here, to where it’s calm and quiet, buy ourselves a house and maybe we’d even have a kid, just one though,” you emphasize.
He arches his brow, “Just one?” he asks.
You nod your head, “After babysitting your siblings, yes, just one,” you repeat with laughter and he himself can’t help but laugh, “I think a girl preferably, but I wouldn’t be mad at a boy, They would probably take after you in looks,” you add, nudging his shoulder.
He blushes for a moment, before faking smugness and winking at you.
You laugh at his confidence before continuing, “And we’d show them the different places this town has just like how you showed me, enough that they’d want to stay here when they’re older,” Jin notices how your eyes glisten as you talk of a time that felt so far away, “And we’d be a small little happy family, supporting whatever it is that their dream will be. And then we’d grow old and grey, maybe have a couple of grandkids running around, and we’d simply be proud of the life we’ve built together—”
And before you could continue on any further, the feeling of his soft lips placed against yours interrupts you, nothing but passion exchanged in the kiss. It isn’t until you’re both out of breath that you break away, Jin immediately framing his hands over your cheeks, “Promise me?” he asks, and you wrinkle in confusion, “Promise me you’ll live a life you’re proud of?”
“As long as you do the same,” you softly answer in return, and silently he nods, “then let’s do it.”
“If only I knew … If only he had been honest with me that night then maybe things could’ve been talked about right then and there before it got out of control…”
Jin crumples the rejection letter and throws it in the trash, frustrated by yet another rejection letter from a directing internship. Tonight he was visiting his parents for dinner while you were out of town on a trip to Busan with some college friends you’d met your freshman year. Taking the opportunity of being by himself in your guys’ apartment, he shredded the number of rejection letters he’d received from several programs in the past couple of months. Too ashamed to show you them.
Looking at himself in the mirror, he couldn’t but feel frustrated. It’d been a year since the two of you had graduated college, and while your career in engineering physics was going great, he couldn’t say the same about his career in directing. Of course when you’d ask how everything was going, he’d feign a smile and say he was still waiting to hear back, guilty that he was incapable of telling you the truth.
Fixing the yellow unbuttoned dress shirt he was wearing over his plain white t-shirt and striped vest, he combs a hand through his hair one last time before leaving, feeling as if his head was about to explode.
“I made Naengmyun, your favorite,” Jin’s mother sets the bowl of noodles down along with several other sides, making sure her oldest son was eating good tonight. She was also trying to mitigate the awkwardness that was in the air tonight, this being one of the very rare occasions Jin and his father spent time together. Over the last year, things still were still stiff between the two, Jin’s father still clearly not accepting of his career choice.
Jin, who didn’t have much of an appetite, stirred with his noodles, hoping his mother wouldn’t notice.
“So Seokjin…” his mothers begins once she seats herself, “how’s everything been going so far?” she asks, genuinely wanting to know what her son has been up to these days.
Jin, trying not to look too uninterested, gives a simple response, “Um it’s been going good,” he casually says.
She nods, “What about y/n?” she asks, always interested in hearing about you.
At this question, Jin seems to perk up more, this change in behavior not going unnoticed by someone else at the table, “Great,” he says, “she’s currently working at a paid internship for some technical writing company that specializes in space and astronomy,” he continues on, “she really seems to love it.”
A smile appears on his mother’s face, happy to know that you were doing great.
“But what about you?” the voice across the table suddenly asks, and Jin is met with the glare of his father, “you seem to have so much to say about y/n, but so little about yourself,” his dad comments, and Jin could physically feel his stomach drop, his words reminding him of what he just shredded at home not too long ago.
“What do you want me to say?” Jin asks, hiding his nervousness through a monotone voice.
His dad scoffs, “That you’re doing something with your life,” he says a little too harshly, “that you’re not living in the shadow of your girlfriend.”
“Sungj—”
“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” Jin sneers in the same amount of attitude his dad had.
“Seokjin!” his mother shouts, “That’s your father you're speaking to,” she reminds him, believing that the practice of respect should still be something upheld no matter what, “Kids, go to your room,” she tells the twins, and without question they do.
Jin quickly calms himself down, just wanting to leave before this escalated any more, “It means that I told you that business was the way to go, but no you were so adamant on proving me wrong and pursuing your dreams that now you can’t even guarantee yourself an independent future!” his dad spat in return, his voice now raising with every sentence . The bottled feelings from years ago now spilling out... rapidly at that.
“Why is it that with you it’s always business, business, business?” Jin throws his hands in the air, “I mean really that’s all I’ve ever heard from you growing up! Jin you need to be like this, Jin you need to make sure you do this, Jin I need this from you,” he mocks his dad, “I mean really is that all you care about dad? Meeting your expectations? Following your footsteps?”
“I do it because you’re my son Seokjin! My son, who I thought I raised to think critically, to strive for success—”
“You think I’m not trying?” Seokjin shouts, his voice turning hoarse at the end, “You think I wanted to fail? To have to come to the realization that—” he stutters, “that shit’s not going how I planned it?” Jin’s mother feels her eyes brim with tears, “That while my long time girlfriend is on her way to becoming a star in her field that I’m stuck waiting tables with a useless degree in my pocket! Is that what you want me to say, dad? Is that it?”
He remains silent.
“You think I don’t know that I’ve made a mistake? That I don’t wake up with the dread of knowing that I’m not at all good for her? That while she could be with someone who makes just as much money as she does and actually provides for her, she decides to stick with me? The person who can hardly offer her anything?” rather than feeling a weight come off his shoulders, Jin feels an extra burden get added on, almost feeling suffocated.
“Well then I’m sorry dad! I’m sorry I couldn’t be the magnificent first born son you wanted!” by now tears are spilling out of Jin’s eyes in such a rapid pace that his vision blurs.
All his father can do is stare at him, unsure of what to say or do.
Growing up Jin’s father wasn’t much of an affectionate parent, that role being filled more by his mother than his dad. If anything his father usually kept more of a reserved and stoic personality, his love language shown by the long nights of work he puts in for his family at the office and the constant pushing for success. And so here in this moment, to have his oldest son who he’d push to his complete limit cry his heart out in front of him, probably in desperate need of a hug, Sungjin just couldn’t bring himself to comfort him.
And so instead he simply said, “Goodnight Seokjin,” in the softest voice possible, before making his way upstairs to his bedroom, leaving the words he so desperately wanted to say unsaid.
Jin feels the arms of his mother hug him, her eyes as teary stained as his, “Ah Seokjin,” her voice breaks as she attempts to comfort him.
“I—” Jin hesitates, “I need to go back home mom,” and gently he breaks away from the hug.
“Seokjin…” his mother worries, “Just stay here for the night, I’ll grab your old sheets from the closet and—”
“Mom,” he simply says, a way of finalizing his decision
Knowing she wasn’t going to be able to convince him, she squeezes his shoulder in an effort to comfort him, “Drive safe,” she says.
He nods, just wanting to go home and sleep the night away.
Unlocking the door to your guys’ apartment, Jin was surprised to see you in the kitchen making ramen, your packed bags laid across the couch.
Having heard the door open, you turn to face him, “Hey—” and almost immediately your expression goes from one of happiness to one of concern. Quickly you rush towards him, his puffy eyes telling you that he’d been crying, “Hey, what’s wrong?” you raise your hand to cup his cheek.
Jin simply stares at you with a saddened look, unsure of what to say. “Hey, I’ve realized tonight after an argument with my father that I’m a complete utter failure, and you have no chance at a happy future by being with me.” Is that what he should say? It was the truth, wasn’t it?
“It’s—” he pauses, “It’s nothing,” he lowers your hand from his face, taking off his shoes and setting his keys down.
“Seokjin—”
“Y/N, it’s nothing,” he repeats, his way of telling you that he was serious, “I’m going to bed,” he exhales a deep sigh, making his way towards the bedroom, leaving you standing in the living room by yourself, wondering what in the hell just happened?
The next morning, as per usual Jin awoke to an empty bed, your Monday’s usually having you go in very early in the morning.
Jin groaned as he got up, remembering that today was his day off. God, did he just wanna stay in bed all day, but remembering that the two of you were running low on groceries, he thought might as well make himself useful and do the buying for the week.
Looking at himself in the bathroom mirror, he noticed the strands of his hair he once kept short now getting longer, resembling the mullet he used to have when he was a teen. Not that he hated it or anything, but it was an odd sight to see, and so he grabbed his hair cutting scissors from the cabinet and began to unevenly chop the long strands of hair ultimately resulting in a chopped banged look. To make it look more natural, he ruffled his hair at the end, not bothering to style it.
After that he changed into casual clothing and made his way to the grocery store, relying on nothing but his pure memory for the things he needed to buy.
Humming while pushing the cart full of groceries back to his car, he stops when something catches his eye.
Across the street was the headquarters of one of the internships he had applied for. And maybe it was due to the argument he had with his dad the day before, or the fact that he’d been feeling like a complete utter failure recently, but getting into his car, Jin couldn’t bring himself to drive away and go back home. Instead he got out of the car and began to walk across the street, unsure of what it was he was planning to do.
Ding. Ding.
Jin rings the service bell, that impulsive courageous feeling he felt earlier suddenly abandoning him.
A man, who looked like he was near Jin’s age, walks out of the back office, a tag that read the name “Jungkook” pinned on the left side of his chest, “Hello, how can I help you?” he greets, a small smile on his face.
“Oh um—” Jin becomes flustered, but deciding that there was no backing down he continued on, “I sent in an application here a couple of months ago and I haven’t heard back from anyone, so I was just wondering—”
Jungkook’s face becomes one of nervousness, “Oh I’m sorry sir—” he tries to interrupt but Jin relents.
“If there’d been some kind of delay in the process, and well if there has been, if I could talk to someone because I really need—”
“Sir,” Jungkook repeats, this time halting Jin from continuing, “that position you’re talking about was filled months ago,” he practically whispers with a look of both awkwardness and pity on his face, “maybe your letter got lost in the mail, but there’s not really much you can do by coming in here.”
Jin, clearly in denial, nods his head no, “Please,” he pleads, “I just need to talk to someone for like ten minutes at most, I swear.”
“Sir—”
“Can’t you write down my number or something? Pass it on at least?!”
Jungkook can only stare at the frantic man, unsure of what to say or do, “I-” he stutters, “I can’t,” he ultimately says, not wanting to give this man false hope nor waste his time by writing his name and number down, “I’m gonna have to call security if you don’t leave,” he says, voice wobbling.
It’s only then that Jin realizes how crazy he must’ve looked. Not only was he in casual clothing, but his hair was all messy and he was sure his eyes must’ve been dilated in cause of his desperation.
“I’m-I’m sorry,” he whispers under his breath, hastily making his way out.
What was he thinking? Barging in and demanding things like that…. God he was losing it. Though he knew better than to let his dad’s words get to him, for some reason they were just eating at him.
“... it’s also important to know that like any other career there is a risk of not making it because at the end of the day that’s how life works and sometimes things are just out of our control… but the real question is if you’re willing to accept it if it happens…”
Your words from years ago ring in his head, and he shakes his head in denial. No he wasn’t … he wasn’t willing to accept it and he knew he’d only continue looking like a fool if he didn’t. But he just couldn’t. Because fully accepting it would mean he’d let you down. That the person you said you were sure was going to make it, was nothing but a failure.
And so he walks back to his car, dreadfully going back home, forgetting the words you spoke after.
That everything would be okay, and that you’d be with him every step of the way.
“Since the day Jin and I had met, we had never seriously fought over anything, yeah, we’d occasionally get into a petty quarrel, but never enough to really get us truly mad. Things like which character in a movie was morally correct, or who ate the leftovers from the night before were as heated as our arguments ever got, and even then we’d always forgive each other after a couple of hours of cooling off, but this time… this time it was different. This time it was serious.”
Opening the door, Jin sighed as set down the bagged groceries on the floor, mentally and physically exhausted from everything, personally declaring to himself that this week was just a really bad week for him.
Taking off his shoes, he began to make his way into the kitchen, deciding that maybe a cold cup of water would relax him.
But when he was met with you, sitting on the kitchen isle’s chair with several shredded pieces of paper on the surface of the isle in front of you, along with an unshredded one in your hand, he was sure he wanted to curl up in a ball and disappear.
The look on your face said everything, it was a mixture of betrayal, anger, and sadness all in one. The two of you stared at each other for the longest, words not having to be exchanged in order to understand what was going on, until finally you break the silence and it’s what you ask that Jin swore he felt his soul go cold, “W-Why?” is all you say, your voice weak and fragile.
He gulps down the lump in his throat, the words barely managing to come out of his mouth, “Because y/n I just—” he pauses, unsure of what to say, “I just couldn’t tell you,” he ultimately says, pushing his hair back with his hand.
“But why?” you repeat the same question from before, your voice now growing louder as you get up from the seat, “I just don’t understand,” you add because no, you weren’t angry, you weren’t sad … you were hurt. You were concerned. You were worried. For you had just found out that the man you loved more than anything went to this extent to hide something from you. To hide something so … trivial.
Tears well up in your eyes when you notice the glossiness in his own eyes, “You—” his voice cracks, “You wouldn’t get it,” he states, and this causes you to get defensive.
“I’m sure I would, if you’d just talk to me,” you barked back, coming closer to him, “Whatever it was, it should’ve never resorted to this!” you flail the paper in your hands around.
You don’t mean to yell, but you do. It was frustration that was coming out of your mouth, he had to understand that … right?
Sighing you continue, “Today at work I just couldn’t focus, not when I knew there was something seriously bothering you,” you explain how you’d come to find the paper along with the rest of it’s shredded companions, “So I asked if I could leave early, thinking that since you had the day off I could maybe possibly get whatever it was out of you. Of course seeing that you weren’t here, I did some snooping of my own and well…” you shake your head.
“You’ve been lying to me for months Seokjin…. each time I’d ask you if you’d heard anything you’d say no, knowing you had … and for what? Because you didn’t wanna show me that you got rejected?” you sigh in dismay because despite him not answering you, you knew exactly why he didn’t tell you anything, “I would’ve helped you, you know? We could’ve worked on your resume or make a better project to show, I could’ve helped,” you grab his hand, a way of wanting to show that even now you were still beside him, “Say something Jin,” your voice breaks.
“You don’t—” he looks down at you, “You don’t get it y/n,” he monotonously repeats, removing your hand from his and walking towards the bedroom, a tired expression on his face.
He could feel it… he could feel himself cracking. With every minute that continued to pass in this wretched day, the selfless Jin everyone knew and loved was reaching his breaking point and the last person he wanted to take it out on was you. But you just kept pushing.
“Seokjin!” you force him to turn around by pulling at his hand, “Just talk to me!” you demand.
“And say what!” he finally screams, “What do you want me to say y/n?!” he cries out, tears spewing out of his eyes, “That I completely failed at my dream? That my dad was right, and that film was nothing but a mistake? That I could be working at some fancy company that pays a decent salary rather than relying on tips from a hard day’s work? That when I look at myself in the mirror, I see nothing but a failure!”
“Don’t say that about yourself,” you demand.
“It’s true isn’t it?” he questions, “Can’t you see that I’m not the person you think I am, that you’ve wasted your time being with some—”
“Just shut up already,” you grit your teeth, “... can’t you see I don’t care? I don’t care if you’re the richest or poorest man on Earth, I don’t care if your dad thinks that your career path is wrong, I don’t care if you or other people think you don’t deserve what you have, I just don’t care! What I do care about is your happiness and that shouldn’t rely on meeting other people’s expectations, including my own Seokjin. Because trust me, as long as I’m with you, I’m the happiest girl in the world. I promise you, if there’s one thing that’s true in this world, it’s that,” you lay your heart bare.
By now the both of you are crying, tears silently rolling down from the corners of each other's eyes.
It hurt to see Jin think so lowly of himself, especially when you knew just how much of an amazing person he was.
“Y/N…” he whispers your name as softly as he can, “I’m just really tired, and I just really wanna go to sleep,” his voice breaks.
“Seokjin—”
“Please?” he frowns, his eyes yearning to be closed.
“I’ll—” you pause for a moment, “I’ll see you in bed then,” you ultimately say, sadness looming in the air for the words unsaid.
Silently nodding, Jin makes his way to the bedroom, gently shutting the door behind him and exhaling a deep breath of air, silent muffled sobs finally escaping. A decision already set in his mind.
“A part of me used to think that I should’ve immediately went to bed that night, that then I would’ve caught him crying and maybe we could’ve thoroughly talked everything out that night, but then I think about all of the events that later happened after that night, and that’s when I understand that maybe we were doomed from the beginning…”
It had been a couple of weeks since the argument with Jin and though your interactions were still a little stiff with one another, you were still hopeful that things would get better. They had to.
Sighing, you unlock the door to your apartment, ready to take a nap after a long day of work. Kicking off your shoes, you say something outloud, assuming that Jin was in the kitchen like he usually was whenever you’d come back from work, “Jin take out the kimchi from the fridge for me please,” your voice weirdly echoes across the room, changing your course of direction from the bathroom to the kitchen.
“Jin?” you ask to an empty kitchen, “Hm,” you hum to yourself, maybe he was in the bedroom …
Walking inside, you see that he isn’t there, but what you do notice is the sudden emptiness of the room. The clothes he’d have thrown around no longer scattered around the room, and his little Mario figurines were no longer on the wooden shelf you two had built from scratch …. What in the hell was going on?
“Seokjin?” you shout again, hoping this was some kind of stupid prank on his part.
In a panicked manner, you look inside every possible room in the apartment, from the closets to the restroom, Jin being nowhere to be found. It isn’t until you do a second search of the kitchen that you notice that there was a note on the floor (most likely accidentally falling to the floor earlier).
Eyebrows furrowing when you read the note, you immediately grab your keys, shock and anger acting as your driving force.
“Right when I left, it began to rain heavy... It’s weird … I remember driving with such a rage that night I was sure I was driving recklessly… but for some reason, as ironic as it was, there was an artist playing on the radio that must’ve kept me at bay, Mariah Carey singing Without You …”
Knock. Knock. Knock.
The door opens.
“Ah Y/N,” Mrs. Kim greets you, her apron from either cooking or baking still on, “I feel like I haven’t seen you in such a long time,” she chuckles, hugging you in the process. Despite your current dilemma, you feign a smile, not wanting to be disrespectful even if you were in a horrible mood. “Is Seokjin with you?” she genuinely asks, and this causes your expression to be one of shock.
He wasn’t here? Then where the hell was he?
“O-oh no,” you stutter, partially due to the freezing weather, “I thought he was here...” you say, and his mother’s face immediately becomes one of concern.
“No...” she hesitantly says, clearly confused, “Not that I know of,” she furrows her brows, “Oh honey, you’re soaking, come in, come in,” she insists, “maybe we can try calling his job using the house phone,” she begins to ramble, but you stop yourself before completely entering, a sudden thought crossing your mind.
“A-a-actually it’s fine,” you say, “I think I know where he is.”
She tilts her head in confusion, “Are you sure? The rain is only getting heavier, and I’m sure neither Seokjin or your parents would want you driving in these conditions,” she says, noting the dull look in your eyes. You appreciated her concern, for you knew she loved you in her own special way, always imagining that you’d one day be her future daughter in law.
It was only expected really, you’d been in Jin’s life for almost 7 years now, both she and your mom always glancing at your ring finger whenever you’d visit, itching to see it decorated by a piece of jewelry.
If only Ms. Kim knew that that dream was slowly slipping away from your grasp at this current moment …
“Yes I’m sure Mrs. Kim,” you finally respond, “Don’t worry, I’ll drive safe,” you try to say as lightheartedly as possible.
Hesitantly, she nods, allowing you to leave.
“When Mrs. Kim had offered me to come inside, something had hit me out of nowhere and I remembered that it was raining. Pouring in fact. And my mind suddenly went back to the days when we were 17, remembering how he’d knock on my door with a bag of takeout after coming back from the one place you could always find him at on a rainy day… the diner. ”
Water is dripping from all over your body when you enter the diner, from your hair to your clothes, you were drenched in mother nature’s tears. The only thing that wasn’t completely soaking wet was the note in your hand, the one you slammed on the booth’s table he sat at once you spotted him.
He looks up at you with a pained expression on his face, “Everything I do is for you, and this is for the best. Don’t come looking for me, for I’ll be long gone by the next morning’s sunrise. I’m sorry. Yours forever, Jin,” you read the note out loud to him, a mixture of anger and hurt found in your voice.
He remains silent, watching as your fingers trembled in anger, “What?” you rhetorically ask, “Did you think I wasn’t going to come all the way down here to look for you, that I was just gonna accept this bullshit of a letter or whatever the fuck you wanna call it, and call it a day? Is that what you honestly thought?”
After several minutes of continuous silence, your voice rises in anger, “Don’t just look at me, say something!” you yell.
“Y/N,” he says, the volume in which you said it, catching the attention of the late night goers also at the diner, “you’re causing a scene.”
You take a seat across from him, planning on being as loud as you needed to be until you got some answers, “How could I not when my boyfriend of over 7 years decides to pack up his things and leave to God knows where while only leaving some sorry excuse of a note for me.” your voice shakes, “What the hell did you expect?”
“I’m sorry,” he whispers, genuinely meaning the two simple words, more than you could ever know. Did you think he wanted to leave you? That he wanted to toss away everything you two had built to the trash? That he wanted to hurt the person who meant the most to him in this world? Of course he didn’t. But he had to be the bad guy in this story. Not for him, but for you. Because he loved you so much, that’d he’d do anything to see you live the life you dreamt of.
“No,” you say, “I don’t believe this,” you fling the letter around in his face, “I need you to tell it to my face, then I’ll believe you,” tears begin to well up in your eyes. There was just no way. The Jin you knew would never do this to you, never in a million years.
“Y/N—” he sighs, but he knows you won’t relent until you hear it from him, “Y/N we can’t be together anymore,” he says, and the words echo in your mind as he continues, “After tonight we’ll be nothing more than strangers,” he says in such a monotone voice, if you didn’t know any better you’d think he was a heartless being.
What you didn’t know was that Jin wanted to cry. He wanted to scream. Every nerve in his body was begging him to break out in tears, but no matter how much he wanted to … he just couldn’t bring himself to break outwardly. Not right now at least. Because right now he needed to be unbreakable.
“You don’t know what you’re saying,” a single teardrop slowly rolls down your cheek, the agonizing ache you felt in your heart now growing because of his words, “Seokjin,” you whimper, “I-If this is because of what you were saying a couple of weeks ago,” forcibly you grab his hand from across the table, your lips quivering in fear of losing the person you loved the most, “then why can’t you see I don’t care? Because to me you’ll always be the tall, lanky, boy with an outdated mullet who first showed me around town 7 years ago with a camera pointed at my face. Because as long as we’re with each other, we’ll get through anything Seokjin …” you squeeze his hand tighter, “You’re my person Seokjin, mine, and mine only,” you try to smile, only causing more tears to spill out of your eyes as they crease.
“Y/N…” just accept it, is what he wants to say because what he was about to say would change how you viewed him, it would make you question everything you ever knew about the person you loved, “I don’t know what else I can say or do for you to understand that I just don’t want to be with you anymore,” he feels the a knot forming in his throat, as if to tell him to stop immediately, that what he was saying would have irreversible consequences, “And I haven’t been for a while…” How disgusting he was.
“You’re—” your voice croaks, “You’re a liar—Seokjin please....” you cry.
He pulls his wallet out and sets the money for his meal down, getting up from his seat in the process, “I truly am sorry Y/N…” is all he can say, before giving you a final kiss on the forehead, his feet fighting against his will to turn around and apologize. To tell you that he was just being an idiot and beg for your forgiveness. But he couldn’t.
He wouldn’t.
And so pushing the door open, he took one final glance at you, knowing he’d left his heart with you.
#ficswithluv#btswritingcafe#btswriterscollective#seokjin fic#bts fic#bts angst#bts fluff#jin fic#seokjin fanfic#seokjin/reader#seokjin x reader#bangtan fanfic#bts fanfic#bts fanficition#bts reader#seokjin one shot#seokjin angst#jin angst#jin fluff#seokjin fluff#Kim seokjin angst#Kim seokjin fluff#Kim seokjin#Kim seokjin fanfiction
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Questions about mbti and enneagram
1. Could these thinkings be related to 4 sx? Since I find them the best examples to assume myself as 4 sx.
>>>> I think I have a tendency to lack common sense and how reality “actually” works unlike most people. But I think that’s what makes me “different” from others. <- I’m afraid this is just being an intuitive type with poor sensory skills. NPs struggle with this a lot, and often NFJs, but INTJs don’t because of Te. That grounds them in reality and gives them an awareness of what’s possible. BUT they still lack sensory perception awareness (eg, putting my foot on the heater would feel nice, not burn me, but I forgot that damn thing is super hot!). All intuitives to some degree feel like aliens in the world, because... there are less of us than of sensors. And what sensors care about and focus on, we don’t.
>>>Tho I sometimes feel lonely because of it, but I love & admit it since it makes me to crave unique ideas and identity, ideals, partner etc. <- This is pretty much just being a human being. Everyone wants those things.
2. What’s your ideas on protagonists and antagonists of each enneagram types? <- I can’t do “villain/antagonists” off the top of my head, but Captain America is a 1, Helen Magus is a 2, P.T. Barnum is a 3, Anne Shirley is a 4, Benjamin Gates is a 5, Black Widow is a 6, Scott Lang is a 7, Marko Rameus is an 8, and Harry Potter is a 9.
3. I have heard that intuition is “knowing something accurately without proof”. But I think intuition can’t operate without any information. Since “knowing” something without a piece knowledge about it sounds more likely to “superpower”. Can you explain about intuition more deeply if u dont mind?
Intuition fills in the pieces. Like the day I started wondering where the stereotype of the “evil housekeeper” came from, since it’s a repeated trope, and theorized that it comes from a distrust of unmarried woman (because culturally that is “abnormal” and people vilify what they fear), and assumed that’s where it came from, but then started doing research about why that might be / the motivations behind it, and discovered a bunch of external evidence to support my theory that male-driven society has always feared strong, independent women, and that was a major driving force behind the witch hunts – they weren’t born of superstition, but opportunism and financial gain, often to strip wealthy women of their power and property. It was an intellectual curiosity that led to me forming independent theories to fill in the holes of what I didn’t know, and then going on to find evidence to support and/or debunk it, but I ASSUMED and that assumption led me to explore.
4. Can 7w6s be anxious like 6w7s do? I know they crave fun before safety, but I have seen some of 7w6s finding common grounds with people and comfort zones in order to be safe.
7w6s have a lot of 6, so yes, they are often anxious, reactive, hyper people, but they possess a lot more natural self-trust than 6 cores do and are more prone to re-conning their mistakes into “learning experiences,” and focusing more on the positives than the negatives, as optimistic types. 6w7s have to work toward optimism out of pessimism, 7w6s have to work out of ignoring problems into admitting they exist. The two types are pulling in opposite directions, so there’s a lot of back and forth between them – lots of highs and lows and mental chaos because 7 is frantic to avoid negative thoughts and commitment, and 6 wants to dwell in them.
5. How do you differentiate between SF and NF? Since they look pretty similar on the surafce due to their people-oriented nature, I am curious.
SFs focus on what can be done here and now, NFs focus on what the future holds and what they anticipate this person will be like. SFs are way more likely to have an accurate view of someone, because they are dealing with who they are today, whereas NFs can get lost in dreaming about them or seeing a better version of them. SFs don’t dig deep enough and their future predictions tend to be pessimistic; NFs aren’t realistic enough and their predictions tend to be idealistic.
6. Can you tell me your ideas about the traits that ENXX types share? I know their functional stacks are different, but I think that they still can have similarities too.
Ambitious, driven, enthusiastic, and forward-focused. Can be work-driven or impulsive. Otherwise, there’s a lot of difference between an ENFJ and an ENFP, and an ENTJ and an ENTP. :)
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Tomas and Rowe - Part 11
this chapter was tough, and I might never be totally happy with it, but I hope you all still enjoy it! I’m doing my best to keep to the fortnightly updates <3
Masterpost
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CW: pet whumpee, dehumanisation, hospitals
-
"Hey," came a voice. When Rowe didn’t immediately wake up, a slap landed across his face. It ground the muzzle deeper into his flesh and forced him awake, wide-eyed and cowering. He was lucky to be spoken to first, of course. Usually he’d be hit without any warning. "Wake up Mutt. You’re finished here."
. . .
"Why couldn’t he come meet me in the waiting room?" Tomas asked the orderly.
"The exit is just this way. We find that most Pet owners like to be discrete in this kind of situation."
The ‘discrete’ room was divided into small curtained cubicles. The orderly left without a word after pointing Tomas towards Rowe, and Tomas was grateful for that at least. Rowe looked horrific. His wrists were strapped into a wheelchair- like he had any intention of running away, given the splint fixed around his left leg. His head flopped to one side, eyes closed, and a thick muzzle was clamped over poor Rowe’s face. His Rowe, that someone had bound and muzzled and hurt. The surge of protectiveness scared Tomas. It felt too close to ownership.
He went to take a closer look at Rowe’s legs, when a hand appeared in his line of sight. Tomas shook it without thinking.
"Hello, you must be the owner. Mr… Grzegorzewski? I’m Dr Scarlett Easton, and this is Dr Jacob Clerval."
"Ah, pleased to meet you both," Tomas said weakly. Out of the corner of his eye he noticed Rowe’s head twitch. He’s awake, then. "He was bad enough to need two doctors, then?"
Rowe flinched, ever so slightly, at the word bad.
"He? Aw, that’s quite cute," smiled Dr Easton. Tomas wished everyone would stop commenting on that. "Dr Clerval here is quite new, so he’s been observing. We thought he might be needed, but only one leg was broken, as it happens. We’ve put it in a splint. The other one just needed stitches."
"Right, that’s good then. And the restraints, I… was he being troublesome?"
Tomas chanced a glance in Rowe’s direction. His eyes were full and apologetic, and Tomas wanted to reassure him that everything was okay, but he couldn’t. Not yet.
"Spoke out of turn."
"Mm. But we could get the arms down without a problem. So there’s hope still," the young doctor said with a smile. Tomas realised a few seconds too late that he was making a joke. It felt too weird to speak about Rowe like he wasn’t even in the room. Discussing him without letting him have a say in the matter. Rowe, of course, looked completely used to it. He sat perfectly still, and it only angered Tomas more. It was normal! Rowe was on his best behaviour despite being muzzled like a bad dog because he’d be hurt if he wasn’t, and that was just normal and expected and understood. It made Tomas’s blood boil. He needed to get Rowe home.
. . .
Rowe’s heart jumped when he heard Master’s voice. The painful fog lifted. Master Master Master. He was here. He didn’t abandon Rowe. He was here and that was worth any punishment he’d give out when Rowe got home. He didn’t remember ever being so happy to see his old master, but he didn’t dwell on that. Master, they fixed my legs. Please take me back home. You said I can have wants. I want to go back home and serve you and let you do whatever you want to me.
The two doctors were talking about Rowe, and Master glanced over a few times, but not to look at Rowe’s legs. He was looking into Rowe’s eyes, staring at him from under his blond curls and Rowe couldn’t understand because that wasn’t where he’d been hurt. He wanted to survey the work the doctors had done, right?
"Okay, thank you," said Master, and his voice was so familiar, so calm and clear and measured, and even through his shame Rowe’s spirits lifted. "I don’t think this wheelchair will be necessary from now on, thanks."
. . .
"That’s handy, because we need it back anyway. And the muzzle."
Tomas tried to act like someone who didn’t care because he had one at home anyway. Rowe kept his eyes down as his mouth was released and again Tomas just wanted to scream at them, because for goodness sake he’s bleeding, and it was fastened over a barely-healed broken nose, and you’re all acting like it doesn’t fucking matter.
"Have you brought a cage for it?"
"If you haven’t brought a cage then he will need carrying, sir."
"That’s- I can get him home fine, thanks."
"Whatever," Tomas muttered, scooping Rowe into his arms without a second thought. He was still light even with the addition of the splint. Rowe didn’t react except to bury his face into Tomas’s neck as he turned on his heel and left.
"Hey, Rowe," he said gently as soon as they were outside. "How do you feel, pal?"
"M-Master," he said weakly.
"I’m here, I promise. Does it hurt?"
"It d-doesn’t matter…"
No Master for once. That was probably not a good sign, right now. "Can you tell me anyway?" Tomas was careful to avoid sounding like Rowe was being rude, or disobedient, or forcing him to tell him out of fear.
"U-uh, it hurts on m-my legs, M-Master. And m-my face."
"From the muzzle, right? Little bastards. I never said they could do that to you."
"I s-spoke without permission, Master."
"Well, I like it when you speak. I like hearing what you have to say." He kept his tone matter-of-fact. Rowe shuddered against his chest, and it could have been a laugh. Yes, I suppose that isn’t said to Pets very often. "And your poor legs. Well, we’re going to try this out, but let me know if it doesn’t work, okay?"
Tomas gently hoisted Rowe onto his back, climbing onto his bicycle very carefully. Rowe clung on; his frail arms hooked over Tomas’s shoulders and the brittle scabs forming over Rowe’s newest cuts tickled his jaw. This is fucking stupid.
"I’ll go slowly," Tomas promised, pushing the bike into motion and vowing never to go back to that wretched place.
. . .
Rowe savoured the last few moments, tucked protectively against his owner’s chest, before they got home and his punishment started. He had wasted Master’s time, he had spoken without permission, he had got blood everywhere upstairs, he was ugly, he was useless, and he was due a punishment. He was due more pain until he was a pitiful, twitching wreck, sobbing that he’d never trouble Master like that again. This was all he could think as he was carried into the house and- not dropped on the floor, as he’d expected, but placed onto the sofa. But- but- Pets couldn’t-
"You’re allowed on the sofa," Master Tomas said, like he’d read Rowe’s mind. "You’re always allowed. But right now, I don’t want any argument, okay?"
Rowe nodded nervously, and didn’t resist as Master unclipped the collar from around his neck. It was insolent and rude and selfish, but Rowe had got used to life without one. He tried to sit up and be pretty, but he was still faint and clumsy with pain.
"H-hurts, Master. M-my legs hurt."
"Rowe?" Master asked, and Rowe’s heart sank because of course, Master would notice immediately. Pets were too stupid to hide things from their Master. The truth always came out, eventually. "You doing okay?"
A pause. "They did… you got painkillers right, Rowe? They gave you anaesthetic?"
Rowe shook his head and immediately Master’s eyes darkened with rage. Wrong answer.
"What the fuck?" Master cried. Rowe flinched. He knew what that tone predated. "No, I’m not- I’m not angry with you. I’ll get you some painkillers."
"P-please, it’s n-not wasted on Pets," Rowe protested weakly, even though he knew Pets never argued with their Master. What was he thinking? Besides, he still opened his mouth obediently when Master approached him with two small pills and some water.
"Okay," he exhaled. Master crouched before him and took Rowe by the hand, ever so gently. Rowe still felt ice run through him at the contact, expecting him to clamp and wrench and pull, but he didn’t.
. . .
I have to do it, thought Tomas as he looked at Rowe. …but I don’t have to do it tonight.
. . .
"Rowe," Master began as he often did, and Rowe liked being reminded that he was important enough to be named. It made him feel wanted.
(made him feel like a person) (no it didn’t)
Master was looking at him so warmly that it made Rowe just want to shy away because he hadn’t earned this kindness. Why was Master even here? What did he want? Why was he here if not to get something from Rowe- to punish him for causing such a fuss?
"When people get hurt, it’s important to be extra nice to them. This doesn’t mean that you can only have nice things if you take pain first, okay?"
"O-okay, Master." But what does that matter?
"I want to do whatever you want tonight. Anything at all. I know having wants is still new, so this is a good chance to try them out." Master ran his thumb over Rowe’s hand. His fingers weren’t rough like old master’s were. They were soft. "Wanting something won’t make me angry. I won’t get angry, I won’t laugh at you, I won’t ignore you."
"I can want s-something?" Rowe timidly confirmed. "I’m not being punished?"
The worst case scenario flitted before his eyes, as it always did- Master’s grip turns painful and he smacks beats hits kicks whips burns hates me and it was all a cruel joke- but it didn’t linger, it didn’t make him seize up. It-
It passed. And all that happened was Master nodded.
"I want-" Rowe’s breath hitched. He knew what he wanted. He couldn’t believe he was even capable of wanting. And now that it wasn’t a dream, or a private thought, the desperation came crashing into him almost too fast to keep up with. It tore and wrenched and made him ache. "Please- please p-pet me, Master, please hold me and ruffle m-m-my hair. I want to b-be held so badly. Please."
. . .
Oh, Rowe, Tomas thought, feeling his heart break once again. I’ve really been cruel to you, haven’t I?
"Of course, pal, of course," he said gently, sitting down next to Rowe and putting an arm around him. "Why don’t you lean on me and get comfortable?"
It felt wrong, Tomas couldn’t deny that, it felt so wrong to let this small, traumatised human rest his head on Tomas’s chest and be pet like a- well, like a Pet. But he also couldn’t deny the way Rowe softened against him. Sure, Rowe went limp a lot, his training making him unresisting and pliable, but this was different. Tomas worked the fingers of his free hand into Rowe’s hair and stroked, all the way down to the top of his spine and back to his crown. Rowe let out a shuddering breath, like all the defences he’d had to keep raised since Tomas got him were being lowered, just for tonight.
The words kept dying on his lips, but Tomas promised himself that if Rowe didn’t respond then he wouldn’t say them again. "You’re- you’re a good boy, Rowe."
Another shudder, and a sniff. Rowe’s face pressed harder into Tomas.
"Such a good boy. You were so brave today."
And then- Rowe’s shoulders trembled, in the way Tomas had quickly learnt they only did when Rowe was crying silently.
"Th-thank you," Rowe whispered between sobs. "Thank y-you so much, Master."
"I mean it," he soothed. "You are so good, Rowe. I’m happy I have you as a Pet."
It was a confession to himself as much as it was a comfort for Rowe. The words sank in, for both of them. Rowe’s crying didn’t abate, and Tomas felt a few tears of his own drip down his face. They landed perfectly on the hand in Rowe’s hair. That’s for the best. Proper Masters don’t cry over their Pets.
Tomas couldn’t help it. All his anger at the hospital had settled into sadness. He wasn’t being selfish. Rowe so desperately needed to feel safe and comforted, even if by morning he would be back to his usual fearful servitude. But Tomas also wanted to drop the pretence, just for a night, and let himself be kind and gentle without confusing his poor precious Pet.
He continued stroking his hair until Rowe fell asleep, his head rising and falling in unison with Tomas’s slow breaths.
(ending loosely inspired by this post)
#tomas and rowe#whump#whump fic#pet whumpee#dehumanisation#master/pet#aftermath of torture#pet whump#aftermath of abuse#mine
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Fearless (part 1/3)
(Ty/Louie fairytale au fic. i am simply a bitch writing about my au and my oc so it is all very catered to me personally and im aware not a lot of ppl will read it. but if you DO read it, i love u so much. i guess tw for blood/serious injuries relating to teen characters. nothing too graphic but be warned. Also if you’re curious, info on the au here, here and here.)
_________________________
[OCTOBER 22ND, 6:19PM]
The sky was bleeding pink and orange and Louie tried to focus on it. Didn't take much brainpower to appreciate a sunset.
He clung to the sight with desperation, muttering the simplest thoughts under his breath like a mantra.
It was pretty.
He liked sunsets.
He liked pink. He liked orange.
The distraction wasn't working. The unpleasantness that was already writhing in his stomach churned.
His finger was on his temple, idly tracing delicate circles against the tightly wrapped bandage. His head hurt.
The point where his shoulder met his upper arm was also dressed. The stitching still had to heal up. That hurt too.
Louie was pretty stupid. Which was not something he usually thought. But it was a real kick in the confidence when someone sharp-witted did something stupid.
And it was a real kick in the heart when someone who didn't wanna hurt anybody ended up hurting somebody.
This was stupid.
He had already tried reading as a means of distraction. Too hard. Too many words. Way too much of a strain on his mild concussion.
This was so, so stupid.
Sitting by his windowsill, he hoped this dumb bandage would be gone soon. His forehead felt sticky and damp with sweat.
He was stupid.
He wished Webby were here. If she were, she'd be in the courtyard below his window sparring with Dewey. At least then, Louie could watch and keep his mind occupied.
No. No, that wasn't right.
If Webby were here, she would've attached herself to Louie by now, hugging him tight until his injury healed.
If it had been any other incident, Louie would let her, crumbling into her arms and whimpering about the pain as his amazing, magical sister made it all ebb away.
But this wasn't any other incident.
If Webby were here, he wouldn't be able to accept her hugs. The very idea rubbed him the wrong way. If anyone was entitled to healing hugs, it wasn't Louie, it was--....
His face twisted up.
Webby wasn't here. She was off on some quest with Lena. Probably wouldn't be back for days.
So there was no point in dwelling over hypotheticals. Louie would heal on his own.
They were both gonna have to heal on their own.
The sunset was fading.
It was pretty.
Pink...
Orange....
He couldn't do this.
Why was he doing this?!
Louie always knew himself to be a coward but this was to a pathetic extent. Depraved even. He felt sick.
He couldn't. He just couldn't. Every additional second he spent hiding in his room was weighing him down. It was suffocating.
But he couldn't leave. He was too scared.
Freezing up just like always.
Just stop being so fucking scared!
He would have to confront what he did eventually. There was no way around it. So, why couldn't he just go now?
Louie had far worse things in his life to be dreading. Far worse.
A ticking clock of trepidation was seated deep inside him. A predestined future he couldn't rewrite which, on all accounts, should render him paralyzed. But he wasn't.
This was the sort of thing to demolish him. Apparently.
Stupid.
This shouldn't be overdriving his other senses. This shouldn't be flooding his mind. He shouldn't be drowning right now.
This shouldn't have his hands shaking.
This shouldn't have him pacing the length of his room.
This shouldn't be stealing the oxygen from his lungs.
His brain was pounding against his skull, protesting his rapid back-and-forth movement. He was dizzy.
He shouldn't be crying.
Fuck it! He was always crying, who cares about that?!
Just stop panicking, just stop crying, just stop being so selfish for once and just own up.
Louie's back crashed against his door, gasping for breath. Stars were blotting his vision and he couldn't breathe and it was the end of the world.
Okay.
Okay.
He was spiraling again. That was all it was, it would be okay.
It would be okay.
The prince's bed chambers, alive with the choking sound of contained distress, subsided to complete silence for just a moment.
Inhale.
Exhale.
And then all to be heard was a small, crackling voice straining to sing himself a quiet little lullaby.
___________
[OCTOBER 22ND, 10:07AM]
"Your highness, don't be an idiot. You can't just---Hey! Wait up!"
"H'oh boy..." Louie's eyes flicked to the high heavens. Right now he felt like he was tasked with personally escorting this goddamn boy across this goddamn forest by the goddamn ankles.
He whirled around impatiently, crossing his arms with a flourish. "Pick up the pace, Tiberius. We don't have all day."
"Can you maybe not be a huge pain for like... I dunno, five minutes?" Snapped Ty, his dearly devoted retainer and most notorious pain-in-the-tail.
"Can you maybe loosen up? Y'know it's a real mood killer when there's a paranoid guy on my case all the time, insisting that the whole world is out to get me. Being constantly reminded of my fragile mortality? Woo, talk about fun times."
Scowling, Ty stumbled his way over a protruding tree root. "You've got a bad habit of attracting danger, you know that, right? I'm pretty sure it's a Duck thing."
The remark slapped the annoyed expression right off Louie's face.
Ty quirked an eyebrow. "What's that look for?"
Before he could further analyse, Louie sharply turned on his heel and strode on.
"It's a Duck thing." He said, keeping his tone even.
Both of them knew it was a Duck thing. Ty just didn't know the half of it.
"Your highness," He heard Ty gripe. "You know this is a bad idea. A prince shouldn't be out in the open like this without proper protection. And I'm unprepared right now. I can't--"
If Ty weren't yakking so much, Louie wouldn't know if he was still there. He wasn't wearing his armor for once so the familiar clank and clatter of metal was nonexistent.
"You got your sword, right? You can do a lot of damage with that thing."
"Yeah but no juice. And I need juice. See, 'cause what if we get in a tight spot and you--?"
"What do you think is gonna happen, Ty?! For the love of all that is gold, It's just a party."
"It's never just anything." He grumbled.
Ty jogged ahead a little, matching his pace to Louie's. His footsteps alongside him were purposefully heavy
So, he was stomping now. Real mature.
Louie rolled his eyes. He was fully aware Ty was pissed, he didn't have to go above and beyond to make his anger known.
"You really think I'm an idiot who doesn't take safety precautions? I'll have you know keeping Prince Louie alive isn't just your problem. Prince Louie is pretty serious about that too."
He gestured to himself.
"If you haven't noticed, I'm incognito today. I've got no crown, no mantle, no status whatsoever. And look at these ugly peasant threads," Louie pointed out, tugging at the hem of his dull green tunic.
"It's actually kinda depressing how drab I look. I'm never gonna do this again actually. But! See how committed I am right now? Who's gonna recognize me? As we're all aware, I'm pretty well known for my pizzazz."
"Just 'cause you stop being a prince doesn't mean danger stops existing."
"No but it makes you way less of a target. Now, are you really gonna spend your whole day off bitching at me?"
The glare Ty shot him was petulant at best. "Well, I didn't wanna. But I got dragged along on this little adventure so guess I gotta."
Louie pursed his beak, irritated. He did not drag Ty along anywhere.
"Come to think of it, I don't remember saying you had to follow me."
Well, that came out as harsher than intended.
Ty didn't seem hurt. At least, there was no sign that he was. No expression cracked his stone mask.
"I've got a duty."
Louie scoffed.
Ty and his stupid duty. It was really starting to wear on his nerves.
But not today, absolutely not today. On this fine, glorious day, Louie was intent on having fun. He would show up at this little forest shindig and he would drink and dance and schmooze and whatever else any carefree person at a party would do.
He would forget about everything that was eating at him. He wasn't gonna let it consume him, he wasn't. He was gonna live. While he still could.
His sixteenth birthday loomed closer. Six months left.
"Sorry." Said Ty, unprompted.
The shadows festering in Louie's head cleared out as he snapped back to the present.
Ty had his eyes firmly downcast, a noticeable slump to his posture.
"It's not like I wanna be running around killing the fun all the time. I really don't. But I gotta."
Louie said nothing. His eyebrows rose in quiet astonishment as he studied Ty's side profile.
He remembered when Ty first came into his life. Twelve years old, brandishing a sword too big for his body and grinning lopsidedly in an unmistakably trouble seeking sorta way.
A real firecracker of a boy, loud and bright. Hungry for adventure and excited to throw himself head first into the action.
He remembered one of Ty's earliest and most confident statements. When he lowered himself to bow to Louie in his uncle's throne room and declared that the prince would never fear for his life again. Because Ty would protect him and Ty was fearless.
Louie believed him.
Make no mistake, Ty had plenty of bite back then too. He had disliked Louie and the feeling had been mutual. But he never doubted that Ty had spoken the truth with his entire heart.
Ty was fearless.
When Louie was with Ty, he was safe. He believed that and he always had. Despite how they clicked as well as a dagger and a keyhole.
Despite Ty being annoying. So annoying.
He was still annoying. But it was different now.
Louie couldn't pinpoint when that permanent glowing smile of his had dwindled and a thin frown had become Ty's default expression.
His sword, something he always used to proudly haul around over his shoulder, now unceremoniously sheathed against his belt. Although Louie had noticed that his right hand never strayed too far from the hilt.
Protecting royalty with your entire being was an all-consuming duty and it seemed, at some point, the reality of such an allegiance had slapped Ty across the face.
He had this distinct way of holding himself now. Always stood straight and rigid, coiled up with agitation. He was prepared to fight at a moment's notice but it was clear the thrill of doing so had been long since drained out of him.
He still smiled. He still laughed. But only sometimes.
Ty was annoying because he was paranoid. Because he was snarky. Because he was too stiff, too protective. And man, what Louie wouldn't give to have Ty's former brand of annoying back. At least never made him feel sorry for the guy.
"Can I ask you a favor?" Louie finally spoke, pushing back a drooping tree branch so they could walk below it
"You can try." Ty shrugged, his gaze still fixed ahead.
"What if we just turn off this whole 'Prince and Retainer' thing today. Whadd'ya think?"
He turned to him blankly, complete with a slight tilt of the head that made Louie a tiny bit weak.
"Wha....?" Ty was simply not computing. He looked as though Louie was throwing out algebra equations and he was supposed to solve them right on the spot. And he was not a math guy by any means.
The cute clueless expression was making it a little hard to focus. Louie swallowed.
"Listen." He began, his thumb dragging itself across his sweaty palm as he struggled with how to phrase this.
Louie had a way with words, always had. But he had a tendency to trip over his own tongue when Ty was involved. Especially when Ty was staring at him with his soft cande-light eyes and doing that stupid adorable head tilting thing and--
"You need a break." Louie blurted out. "You're stressed like constantly and it's getting kinda insufferable and I think your Dad would sick a dragon on me if his barely fifteen year old son suddenly kicked it 'cause of a paranoia overload so I think you should just forget about being my big strong hero for today and come hang out with me at this stupid peasant party and we can just be two regular kids instead of a royal and his bodyguard do you think you could give me that Tiberius?"
It was only in the following beat of silence that Louie realized how fast he spat that all out. He struggled to catch his breath.
One second.
Ty blinked.
Two seconds.
A flicker of vacant eyes and then a rush of realization. And then disbelief. And then--
Three seconds.
His brow scrunched together and a snarl crinkled his muzzle. His eyes flared.
Oh, he was mad....
"Are you crazy?!" Ty shouted.
He was beside himself with a malfunctioning mix of fury and incredulity that had him stammering his words.
"You-You can't just--.....D-do you even-- you don't...do you realize how disrespectful that is? For you to say it? For-For me to do it?! I was given this duty by the King! The fucking King! To just suddenly "turn it off" would be--....I can't--!"
Maybe "mad" was an understatement.
"Ty--" Louie tried.
He was cutting across Louie, treading back and forth on their forest path,. Not going further, not going back. Just walking to nowhere for the sake of being too scandalized to possibly stand still.
Louie was attempting to get Ty's attention by grabbing his tunic but he kept shaking him off.
"I'd be a disgrace! An embarrassment! I'm trusted by the royal family to keep--...to keep you safe! I-I can't just walk around with my liege like I'm on vacation and not be on guard! You don't even get it, you--"
"Ty!" Louie said loudly."You wanna maybe listen for a sec?!"
Frankly, he was surprised Ty halted his tirade. His eyes were blown wide, stunned and Louie wasn't quite sure why until he followed Ty's look, snapping down.
Seems in his effort to get a hold of the guy, he had instinctively reached out and snatched Ty's wrist.
They stood frozen for a moment, each set of eyes boring into the touch that tied them together.
Louie's fingers began to uncurl.
Then he decided no. His grip on Ty tightened with a purposeful squeeze.
Ty met his gaze, looking....panicked? Confused?
Didn't matter. He could besottedly dissect his unreadable facial expressions later.
Louie inhaled, deciding to shoulder his dignity for just a second. No safety rails of snark this time. Ty might make fun of him for being sincere later but this was important.
"Don't you miss being a kid with nothing to worry about?" Louie implored. "Because if we're being real, I don't think we're ever gonna get to live like that again."
Ty muttered something to himself, shaking his head a little.
"But listen," Louie continued, taking a step into Ty's personal bubble.
Ty took an automatic step back.
But since he was still holding his hand, Louie was led a step forward.
It was difficult to tell with the pink fur but he could've sworn Ty reddened.
"Look I know it's weird for me to be asking but....can't we just take a risk today? It's just a party in the woods. Literally the least likely place to find any danger in the whole kingdom."
"We shouldn't--"
"Ty, please."
Honestly, Louie was a little surprised at himself. He hadn't even planned for Ty to accompany him anyway. But in the heat of the moment, everything had shifted upside-down. Turns out there was something inside him willing to beg. Something that wanted more than anything, for Ty come along.
He just wanted a simple memory of just killing time with Ty. Separated from the castle and everything that reminded him of his fate. He would like to smile without a hint of dread for once this year.
So, he said just that. "I'm not just trying to make you come along 'cause I'm stuck with you. That's not it." He swallowed. "You're--....you're cool. You're fun. I wanna have you around. You know, when you're not so worked up and you're just being yourself, I like hanging out with you."
He tugged Ty's hand a little. Further from his sword and closer to Louie.
"I want you to come with me. And I want you to try having fun too."
He may as well just tell the idiot he thought about him every time he saw a sunset.
The hand he was grasping flexed its fingers.
Ty abruptly broke eye contact and glanced to the side, his tongue poking out to pierce the tip of his jagged tooth. His indecisive face.
"I just--.....I dunno...." He muttered. "If something happened to you--"
"Nothing's gonna happen to me." Said Louie immediately. "I've got a good feeling about this. And c'mon Ty, that coming from a coward?"
"You're not a coward." He said, barely a whisper. He was now staring at the ground.
"I promise."
"Huh?"
Louie smiled tightly as Ty looked to him questionably.
"I promise nothing is gonna happen. I'm gonna be fine. You're gonna be fine. Now, can you do me this favor and maybe, I dunno, trust me?"
The look Ty gave him was a little sad, but it was soft. And then with only a tiny twitch, it shifted into something else entirely. It was trust. Blind trust. Maybe stupid trust.
A minuscule pang of guilt jabbed at Louie. Of course he wanted Ty to trust him. He needed him to if there was any hope of achieving his goal here.
But objectively, he really shouldn't. Louie was hiding way too much from him. It wasn't fair.
Then Ty broke the world, shattered orbit and played around with reality itself by cracking a smile and Louie forgot every coherent thought he ever possessed.
He would never put on record just how long he spent pre-preparing jokes, gunning to get the corner of Ty's lips to flick upwards. Made him seem kinda desperate. Which he was not.
Ty had that oh, so stereotypical "cute boy" smile. It was crooked, cocky, it was utterly obnoxious. Louie hated it.
And worst of all, it was like a little spell to kick Louie's heart into high speed. Sometimes it dazed and confused him like a blinding light flash.
But other times, it was warm and if he stared long enough, he'd fall asleep.
Louie loved Ty's smile.
Every time he tried to convince himself he didn't, he ended up dwelling on it too much and the way his mouth would quirk up would play in his mind on a maddening loop and then it would be too much to handle and the truth that he loved it would always overpower him.
So, whenever that happened (like right this second.) he gave up and admitted it. To himself, anyway.
He loved Ty's smile.
He loved Ty.
......Wait.
That last part was new, hold up. Rewind.
But he didn't get the chance because Ty was talking now.
Still a little dazzled, Louie didn't catch what he said but he figured it was good since he was still smiling.
And then that smile broke into a huge grin, his eyes flashed with trouble and his hands were on Louie's shoulders and--
"Race ya!" Ty cried.
With a light push, Louie was stumbling backwards and Ty kicked off into a sprint.
For a brief moment, Louie could only gaze after him, stupefied.
Love, huh? Like the real deal?
That was crazy.
But then he snapped out of as he recalled the audacity of this bastard.
"You just pushed your liege!" He shrieked, receiving a loud "WOO!" from Ty as a response.
And then Louie was grinning. He was giddy. He didn't quite know if he forgot about love in that instance or if it was the force powering him but he was tearing off after Ty, yelling about the latter's totally unfair head start.
In hindsight, he should've figured it was love a long time ago. Who else would get him to run for no reason?
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May I request GHJPU for Sebastian? Sebby needs more love :D (eee sorry if any of this overlapped or its too much, have a cookie for your troubles 🍪)
DID SOMEBODY SAY LOVING SEBASTIAN HOURS!?!?!?!?! FERAL EYE GLEAM
Bless your heart!!! Sebastian has found a new and very dear place in my heart as of late, I would be delighted to offer my thoughts!!!!! :D (your cookie offering has been accepted with the utmost glee 🍪, I hope my humble writing efforts will bring you equal joy, lovely~💖💖💖)
G = Gifts (How does he feel about gift giving? What are his habits when it comes to this?)
Awwww haha, baby boy Sebby is honestly a very observant and reliable kind of S/O, I think. He will notice even the tiniest of changes in MC’s expression--the slightest shifts in her temperament. As a result of his attentive nature he has an easy time deducing the things she might like, always makes a mental note of where her eyes linger. Is there a classic she once loved in her time being published for the first time in their era, on display at a bookstore nearby? Noted. Does she hover near shops filled with self-care products--things like scented candles or lotions or bath salts, things she considers indulgent luxuries? Noted. Is there an outfit that caught his eye in a boutique, something he thinks would complement her complexion perfectly? Noted.
The thing about Sebastian is that his gifts will be heartfelt, timely, and devastatingly thoughtful. Whether something small or something lavish it will always be precisely what she needs/wants, and she can sense the loving care he put into finding the perfect gift.
H = Holding Hands (When/how does he like to hold hands?)
Honestly? Sebastian has spent the better part of his life alone. His circumstances weren’t the worst; for all that he’s lost in his life he never went hungry, lived comfortably. But...that doesn’t change the fact that his life has been fairly devoid of meaningful human contact. Even in college, friends and close colleagues were hard to come by. The few people he did develop budding feelings for he always gave up on long before it could become any kind of substantial relationship. He was always the type to admire from afar, never really felt worthy of the people he liked.
It was MC that was the first to reach out to him, and for the first little while in their relationship she will be the one most naturally inclined to reach for him. He isn’t really used to having someone by his side like this, somebody who would be delighted to hold his hand--who wants to be close to him. It’s always a shock when they go grocery shopping and he just feels her fingers wrap gently around his. She blushes a little and says something about not wanting to get separated, but it’s clear what her real motivation was.
After those first few months, it becomes much more natural for him to reach for her hand when they’re traveling somewhere together or when they’re alone. He likes to intertwine their fingers, loves the way they fit against his perfectly. His shyness wears off after a while, and it’ll be rare to see them together without them holding hands--unless they’re cooking or at work.
J = Jokes (Does he like to joke around with or prank her? How?)
Do you know how cats have their eyes all narrow thin pupil but then they go REALLY REALLY round? That’s Sebastian. I tend to refer to it as “Silly Time Mode Engaged.”
Now then, his kind of joking is very dry and very deadpan. It’s subtle and immediate, so if you’re not attuned to it it can be easy to miss. That, or people just look at him weird because they don’t quite get the connection he’s making and/or the delivery feels off because his facial expression doesn’t change at all, completely flat. That being said, one of his all time favorite things to do is to say something absurd or nigh histrionic (which tends to be uncharacteristic of him) and wait for the confused head turn/startled laughter to hit. He will make puns and play on words all the time--he puts his academic knowledge to good use.
“I swear when I first met you I was convinced you were an AI.”
“Alexa taught me everything I know.” He’ll bow.
“Oh? Do I have competition, in that case?”
“Your speakers are suboptimal (he pokes her freckles), but you possess what Alexa lacks.”
“And that would be?”
He’ll gather her close, smiling against her lips. “My heart.”
:D cutest robot I ever saw uwu
Bonus bc I have a problem:
“Is stealing hearts in Alexa’s programming? Just to be safe, of course.”
“I think it’s safe to say it isn’t within the parameters of her design--but that doesn’t mean you’re out of the woods just yet.” cue sounds of tickling and laughter
The other way Sebastian messes with MC is that he is an ENORMOUS tease in the bedroom. He’s very much the kind of lover that prefers to tantalize and draw things out; a long, slow seduction that will render MC immobile from the pleasure by the end. The promise of a kiss is almost always only a whisper of the feeling he intends to drown her in. Remember that Sebastian’s stoicism belies a nigh inhuman ardor and self-control. He’s more than willing to leave her wanting in order to fully capitalize on that desire later at night.
P = Pet Names (What does he like to call her?)
Other than her name? HE DOESN’T AHAAHAHAHAHA
Just kidding of course, but given where he comes from pet names between couples aren’t...really a thing…(take it up with Japan, I Was Today Years Old, my sappy romantic ass would never survive)
The funny inverse of this though is that he does NOT fuck around with people that try to call MC pet names. When Arthur Tries It™ he canonically goes all steely saccharine, openly telling the others they’re together. So none of that “luv” or “doll” business, he will not have it (he won’t fight the purebloods on it because 1. they’re more like doting grandfathers than anything and 2. Sebastian does not have a death wish). If MC has a nickname of some kind, then I could see him using that or adding his own spin on it with a great deal of affection c:
U = Upset (How does he act when she’s upset?)
Whether he was the cause or not, Sebastian has a single modus operandi when his beloved is upset (and to anyone who’s upset really) and that is to offer gentle reassurance/an apology. He is very, very sensitive to the feelings of others and really takes it to heart when someone isn’t feeling well. That being said, he won’t always be overt about his concern--he’s more the type to do little things that offer constant support/reminders that he’s there for them.
If it’s something more serious, he will do everything in his power to minimize the harm done and sooth the MC. His attempts to comfort her will be tender, muted, and consistent; prolonged hugs, doubles his offering of sweets, makes her favorite foods, gives her a relaxing bath salt to use--anything that he knows for certain will coax her lips up into a smile. He’s the type to freely offer space for her to figure things out if she needs it, but he will also be watchful; he won’t let things escalate if she needs externalized support to heal (bc lbr some problems we can’t solve alone ;-;).
His other go-to method is to offer distractions in any capacity that he can. Will offer to teach her a new recipe, or find a new type of flower he wants to plant together, or make up some kind of project he needs help with. Sometimes he’ll genuinely need the help, but most of the time he does it for the express purpose of getting her mind away from negative things and focused on him/the present. It’s hard to dwell on upsetting things when you’re body is physically demanding something else from you, even more so if it’s a fairly complex task. She’s known to be very dutiful; she’ll be so focused on doing a good job she’ll forget the sadness/irritation for a bit and the intensity of the emotion might ebb slightly.
If the issue is lighter, he’ll probably just cuddle/tickle her back to fighting spirit, pressing kisses wherever he can reach until she starts giggling. In these instances he prefers to hug her from behind, a reminder that she doesn’t have to face anything unpleasant or unnerving all on her own; he’ll always be there to hold her steady whenever she needs him.
And rest assured, this man is always gathering data to optimize his comfort capabilities. He is incredibly adaptable, and will always be watching her reactions closely to adjust his strategies.
#asks#ikevamp#ikemen vampire#ikevamp sebastian#ikevamp sebas#ikevamp headcanons#ikevamp hcs#ikevamp akihiko#these were really fun to write!#sebby's route was a delight#he definitely climbed up my personal rankings for sure#ikevamp has given me so many delightful surprises#it'll likely still be a wait for the english crowd tho so i hope this tides you over lovelies~#not incorrect quotes
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meeting the kids
authors note: OKAY LISTEN- i honestly need to learn how to write good imagines (especially about the aged up characters) so i’m about to get serious lol- but i hope that people give me some criticism on my imagines :’)
synopsis: you and shota have been in a relationship for almost a year but you get the feeling he is hiding something from you, so you find out he has kids, and you just so happen to meet all 20 of them.. in the mall.. when one of them was hitting on you..
warnings: fluffy fluff :’)
word count: 1.6k words
aizawa shota x !fem! reader
shota has been crazy busy ever since the new school year started, it was 1 am in the morning and he still had his face shoved in his laptop constantly typing away. the two of you moved in together a month ago and you understood that being a teacher was really hard but now it felt like he was barely in your shared apartment, heck he barely spoke now. you brought him a cup of water and he thanked you and got back to work, so you sighed and put your head down on his shoulder and proceeded to inhale his scent. “you've been at it for a while shota.. i think you need to take a break,” your voice was muffled by his neck. “kitten i really need to get the this report done, i’ll go to bed in a few minutes i promise i’ll be there soon,” he groaned out out of stress, and kissed your forehead and turned his attention back onto the unfinished report. you sighed and walked towards your shared bed and got comfortable underneath the blankets and checked the time once more.
“why does midoriya have to get into trouble 99% of the time, i just want to go to bed already..” complaint after complaint the report was almost finished, he turned back to you laughing at your cute bed head as you tossed and turned in your slumber, oh how he wished to just hold you and go to bed already but this group of first years were troublesome so he worked harder than ever to spend more time with you, his kitten.
you have been on edge for quite some time now. ‘is he really hiding something from me?’ for the past month your boyfriend has been undeniably busy with his job and you were 100% sure that there was something going on. as a secretary of fatgum’s agency you knew of only one U.A student and that was amajiki but he was a third year and you highly doubted that he knew anything about shota’s class. ‘what if it is a teacher?’ you really did hope it wasn’t that given scenario. nothing made you more sad than the fact you barely could see him at work.
meanwhile at U.A the students were talking amongst themselves. “did you hear about how aizawa sensei might have a significant other?” ochaco whispered to tsu and jirou as they were walking through the halls. “all i know is that they have been together for about a year or so based off of his conversation with all might..” tsu and ochaco nodded at the given intel, the entire class was really curious on their teacher ever since the school year started. “but shouldn’t we be focusing more on training as of now? since we have to keep up bakugou.. ribbit” as the three girls got to the class they stopped at the door to see everyone making plans.
“as class 1-A’s representative we as a class should become closer to form more unity between all of us, thus will make our group stronger,” everyone looked around to see each of the students nodding in agreement. “ohh let’s go to the mall! there is a karaoke place and a really good manga store at the one near the school,” the black haired girl had stars in her eyes at the thought of spending money, todoroki just wanted to waste his fathers money while everyone else was excited for karaoke. “that is a great idea momo! we can scope out all of the hotties” everyone took the time to stare down at mineta. “I’LL GO IF ONLY THAT GRAPE HEADED FREAK STAYS AWAY FROM ME.” “calm down bakubro.”
“thanks for coming with me shota i really need to get something for my friends birthday,” your boyfriend smiled at your thoughtfulness, you always had a generous demeanour so he couldn’t help but go with you to the nearby mall on his off day. “it’s okay kitty i worked out something with the ladies at the front desk to carry on my work for me, so you have my full attention.” an arm was lazily draped over your shoulder, “doesn’t one of them have a thing for you?” you asked, the feeling of guilt flooded you because doubting him was never something you would do but with how busy he was at work it felt weird to think about it; he could’ve given his co-workers his work and spend more time with you and this feeling in your gut made you feel so selfish.
he stopped you from walking any further, and gently got you to face him and hooked his fingers under your chin to tilt you head to look up at him, “why would i dwell on that when i have you kitten.” you felt like you were on cloud nine and it made you feel safe and loved. you smiled and looked straight into his eyes, and kissed him on the lips to really show that you were happy in his arms and the two of you were on your merry way to the mall to pick up the items you needed.
on the other side of the mall however was chaotic. the class 1-A gang, was charging towards the building, “please refrain from causing trouble, i will not have our school’s reputation be tainted by our outing!!” “iida calm down your yelling is creating a scene.” it was a sight to see 20 children together all at the same time. “how about this, since the boy’s are likely to whine about following the girls on a shopping trip it let’s split up and come to the food court at around 2 pm giving us two hours to get everything done and then we can spend one more hour after we eat to do karaoke.” toru asked the class in which they agreed. in full honesty everyone was trying to avoid bakugou’s rage in public.
however mineta had other plans..
his plan was to follow the girls until they got to a bathing suit shop, for his own ‘research purposes’ that involved a camera. so he did everything he could to not get caught by the girls. so the moment he got to the shop he had a sickening look on his face. but what really sought his eye was a silhouette in the store that he couldn’t resit from taking a picture or two. unfortunately that lady was you..
the longer you took to choose the bathing suit you wanted to give to your best friends you felt an odd presence and you knew for a fact that it was not your boyfriend because you know he was getting you a drink from the food court. since you ‘ate too little at home.' you stopped what you were doing and you looked around, really got spooked, but there was no one watching you. the only other people in the store you saw was a group of girls that were engrossed in the variety of choices to choose from.
all was good until you felt a breeze shoot up your skirt, and with your luck you weren’t wearing any shorts underneath and you also heard a camera click. you looked down and screamed, “help t-theres a p-pervert!!” the store clerk looked in your direction, the girls in the store did nothing except face palm at the sight of the ‘pervert’ a few seconds later a bunch of high school boys ran into the store, “MINETA WHAT ARE YOU-” “sir, calm down please there are police officers are coming to handle this situation."
you couldn’t believe it, you were an adult and you were getting peeped on by a high school boy. you were trying to get as far away from the guy as possible and prayed that your boyfriend was coming soon.. “y/n are you okay?! i came as soon as i heard- MINETA WHAT IN WORLD ARE YOU THINKING HARASSING A WOMAN IN PUBLIC.” you were purely confused because you have never seen shota so angry, and most importantly you were confused on how he knew the pervert.
“AIZAWA SENSEI?!”
“so you’re telling me you left mineta unsupervised, but you forced bakugou to go with an entire group?” “in our defence sensei, bakugou is technically a weapon of mass destruction.” you were amused at the sight of aizawa acting like a teacher was undeniably hot to you. “and you,” he snapped his head towards ‘mineta’ “you will have to be on class duty for the rest of the year for hitting on my girlfriend, do you understand me?” and thats when chaos ran loose with the girls. “THIS IS HIS SIGNIFICANT OTHER?!” “WOAH I THOUGHT THEY WERE FRIENDS” “ I THOUGHT HE WAS DATING PRES MIC” and thats when aizawa face palmed and you peeked behind aizawa, "you should introduce yourself y/n."
“u-um hi, my name is y/n l/n and yeah i’m dating your teacher.. you don’t have to call me sensei or anything and i forgive you mineta, i’ll make shota’s punishments lighter on you i promise.” you timidly say to the class and they were dumbfounded. “CAN YOU BE MY MOM?!” “AIZAWA SENSEI SHE’S THE ONE.” "MARRY THEM ALREADY." and you just stood there and smiled and interacted with them for a little while until you told them all to go home.
as the two of you were walking back home you took shota’s hands to stop him from walking any further and let go of his hands to now cup his face, “so this is why you were being secretive, cause you have a pervert, a weapon, and a bunch of our shippers in your class. what an interesting group you got there,” and you proceeded to kiss his lips with a smile on both your faces. “yeah every time you asked me to go to bed i was writing baout my problem children.” he laughed and you were relieved. “sho can i tell you something?” “yes kitty you can tell me anything on you mind.” "have you thought of marrying me?" shota giggled,
"i wouldn't have it any other way."
#bnha#mha#bnha x reader#mha x reader#bnha imagines#mha scenarios#bnha fics#mha fics#bnha aizawa#mha aizawa#mha shota#bnha shota#aizawa x reader#aizawa imagine#aizawa scenario#eraserhead x reader#daddyzawa#mha eraserhead#bnha eraserhead#mha eraserhead x reader#bnha eraserhead x reader#mha pro heroes#bnha pro heroes#shota aizawa#shota aizawa x reader#shota aizawa x reader imagines#shota aizawa x reader scenarios#shouta aizawa#shouta aizawa x reader
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Hey! I saw you were taking requests :3 would you mind writing (hcs, scenario, anything!) a thing where, shortly pre-OVW recall, McCree and his old teammate (f or neutral pronouns are fine but it’s up to u!!) accidentally meet again after he left without warning? Bonus points for “I thought u were dead/I was never gonna see you again” type stuff :p thanks! Sorry if this was confusing!
{This was, like, super fun to write? I did kinda flip part of the script, but it still fits what you asked for (hopefully). Minor warning for implied alcoholism though, oops. It can also be read as more of a “bars exist for brawls” than “alcohol is my coping method” though, so maybe that’s not as bad??? IDK, at least the ending feels cute.}
{-J}
After the fall of Overwatch and its subdivisions, there were certain things that you had been forced to accept: Dozens of your friends and coworkers had died, you were out of a job, and everything you had worked so hard for had crumbled into oblivion. So yeah, shit, you ended up drinking away your pain more than once. At this point you weren’t even sure how many places you were banned from. Still, you held onto the pride that came from never starting any fights, instead waiting for some asshole to decide he wanted to rumble with an ex-Blackwatch agent. It was messy, dangerous, and only added to your nasty reputation.
Few organizations would even think of hiring you. Did that make your drinking worse, or did your drinking make the job search harder?... It wasn’t something you wanted to dwell on, especially considering how desperately you were trying to change things. Mercenary work hadn’t suited you for long, as all your clients were faceless, mysterious forces pulling strings from the shadows. How could you trust that they weren’t like Talon?... Or like Blackwatch had become? In the end you had been forced to slink back into the shadows, praying to whatever gods may be that you could still do some good for the world.
That was a couple years ago. You had changed your name, traded out your old gear for something less suspicious, and set yourself up along the halfway point of Route 66. The area was known for its problems with gangs, violence, and a general lack of government intervention. Sure, the road itself spanned across eight different states, but most of it had been in a state of disrepair for a few decades now. The Omnic Crisis was the final push that sealed the region’s fate. Or, at least, it had been. Some people still cared.
Like you. Why else would you be here, now, scanning the horizon, a beer in one hand, binoculars in the other? There certainly weren’t any good birdwatching spots nearby. Just a rundown gas station perfect for staging ambushes, an old school diner with shitty coffee, and a dusty, dirty crevice up high, wonderful for keeping an eye on it all. You didn’t like it up here, but it was the only discreet place to perform surveillance on the local miscreants.
Apparently a new gang was starting to harass people in the area, despite the proximity to Deadlock turf, and were trying to sell “insurance”. Understandably, that really pissed you off. Sweet-talking one of the locals had gotten you insight on the gang’s general daily routine. Nothing too specific, unfortunately. Now all you had to do was wait for the scum to show up so you could pound them into the dirt.
Taking a quick swig from your beer, you settled in a little, preparing to wait for who knows how long….
Dust flew into the air like a trail of smoke, blurring your vision but not deterring you in the slightest. You slipped around your target, barely avoiding his second kick, before slamming your elbow into the back of his head. Sure enough he went crashing down with a thud. More dirt was kicked up in the process. At least it made it a little harder for the gang members still outside to target you. Another quick dash landed you behind cover, where you could finally take a moment to breathe.
“Damn it,” you grumbled, hearing yet another bullet whiz past your hiding spot. There were still four or five gunmen outside. Truthfully, that was the total number of people you had expected to find, not just the backup boys. Sure, you had prepared for unforeseen hiccups, but apparently not enough. In over your head, stuck sitting like a duck, reminded more and more of the old days. Shit, you missed your teammates. Normally Jesse or Genji would have saved your ass by now.
You missed them. So much, in fact, that you were pretty sure you just heard Jesse’s signature “high noon” line. It almost made you feel like you were a bit more tipsy than you had thought. When the sound of a revolver firing reached your ears, you couldn’t help but wonder if you had actually died; if so, this was the weirdest form of afterlife known to mankind. Curiosity ended up getting the best of you. Crawling to the side, you made sure not to reveal any part of yourself to your enemy, working your way towards the building’s secondary entrance. That was still within the gang’s line of sight, but you hoped it was far enough to the side that they wouldn’t immediately notice you poking around the corner.
Sure enough, nobody shot at you when you turned the corner. Someone did, however, raise a silver revolver in your direction. Air got caught in your lungs as you stared down that ever-so-familiar barrel. Relief started to flood your chest… until you realized that the gunman wasn’t wavering in his stance. Your gaze follows up his arm, to his face, and you suddenly wish you weren’t wearing this stupid goddamn mask.
“Hold it, buddy, unless you want to end up like your compadres back there,” Jesse McCree drawls, tipping his head back towards the fallen gang members. Evidently he hadn’t seen you beating the crap out of the ones inside. Still, you raised your hands slowly, showing your lack of weapons. “There we go. Now, take off that there lil’ mask, nice and easy, alright?” You complied, of course, tossing it to the side before throwing a grin in Jesse’s direction. His reaction made you really, really wish you had brought a camera. The normally smooth and put-together cowboy is now slack jawed, a sense of wonder (and something else…?) in his eyes. Soon your name drops from his lips, whispered like a sacred prayer.
“It’s good to see you too, Jesse,” you manage to reply, still grinning like a fool. Hardly a moment passes before the wind is suddenly knocked out of you. Jesse had holstered his gun, closed the distance between the two of you, and pulled you into a hug in a matter of just a couple seconds. The action catches you by surprise, now making you the one to choke on the words caught in your throat. Still, you manage to hug him back, leaning in to gently rest your head against his chest.
“Goddamnit, who gave you the right to surprise me like this?” He asks after a few moments of silence, his voice on the edge of breaking. His grip was tight, like a man desperate to keep his sanity clutching onto a lifetime of coping methods. Words failed you, barely managing a confused noise, as you pulled back just enough to look him in the eyes. There was something you couldn’t comprehend in his gaze. Something you were missing, that required knowledge you didn’t have. Your head tipped to the side as you hoped for at least a little elaboration. Jesse seems to realize your cluelessness, and shakes his head with a bitter laugh. “I thought you were dead,” he murmurs, the words settling on his tongue with an all-too-familiar weight.
Shit, you thought, eyes going wide for a moment. Thoughts raced through your head as you tried to process what he said, thinking back to what had happened after Blackwatch’s disbandment, wondering why he could possibly have thought that you were-
….
….
Fuck.
Yeah, that tracked. Going from constantly fighting in bars to fucking off to nowhere, changing your name, and turning to the vigilante lifestyle? No shit people thought you were dead. How had you ever thought that this was a good idea?... Sure, most of your old friends had done the same, scattering across the four winds without so much as a “lol bye” (or, you know, a proper farewell). However, that didn’t mean that there weren’t still people who cared, who you could have at least made the slightest effort to keep in touch with before disappearing. People like Jesse.
“Now that you mention it, I realize I didn’t exactly leave much room for thinking anything else,” you replied, barely managing to speak through your embarrassment. A laugh tried to move past your teeth, even though you knew the timing was bad, but the sound died as soon as your gaze met Jesse’s.
“That’s one hell of an understatement, old friend,” he said, hardly a trace of mirth to his name. Both of his arms were still around your frame, gently cradling you, as if a stiff breeze might sweep you away from him once more. You could feel his body shifting with every breath he took, slowly finding yourself matching the movements. One of Jesse’s hands moves to cup your cheek, fingers sliding so carefully that you almost didn’t feel it, but you lean it instinctively, finding your lips placing a whisper of a kiss against his wrist. “Darling,” he breathes, voice caught in his throat, blocked by joy and surprise alike.
“I’m sorry for worrying you, Jesse. I swear I never meant to just vanish like that,” you plead, tears pricking the corner of your eyes. “Things were bad, and I… I just ran from that, I guess. But you didn’t deserve that, at all, and I swear to whatever passes for high heaven these days, if you give me a chance-....” Pulled in closer, you couldn’t help but squeak a little when Jesse plants a kiss on your forehead. One of his hands is rubbing gentle circles into your back. A reassurance, one you desperately needed. “I can make it up to you. We can do better this time, right?...”
Jesse didn’t say anything, at least not at first, but the feeling of his hat settling down on your head gave you all the answers you’d ever need.
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