#and instead of wasting time freaking out about my body changing in ways I can't fathom | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

soliloquiss · 2 years

Text

( THE MOVIE OR ME ? ) LUXIEM X AFAB! READER 18+

❥ getting freaky in the cinemas with the luxiem boys

❥ WARNING: NSFW, MINORS DO NOT INTERACT (V LONG POST AGAIN BYE)

VOX 👹 — it was unanticipated for the movie having several r18 scenes happening left and right, causing you to get irked and sexually frustrated at the same time. meanwhile vox beside you isn't saying anything nor his expressions seem to change. if anything, he looks intrigued and interested, opposedly to you. you try to shift your attention back once again to the movie playing on the big screen.

as of the moment, the story actually seems to progress but a little while after, another bed scene was occurring. "just how much does this movie have porn?" you ask vox with a disgruntled face. "i didn't see it coming too." he responds in a low voice, attention still anchored at the movie. you sigh and decided to try bearing with the scenes for a little while. focusing again, seeing the couple in the movie caress each other's body and showering each other with passionate kisses, the libido in your body increases rapidly. your breath deepens as they undress each other, until your vision gets blurry and you start to envision yourself with vox doing those things instead. "vox . . ." you whip your head to the right again and place your hand on his thighs. he notices how you're acting unusual as confusion paints his pretty face, eyebrows furrowed. you begin to reach for his bulge and palm it from his white trousers, and vox bites his lips in an attempt to suppress the gasp about to slip out of his mouth. "you're surprisingly bold today." he whispers on your neck, his hot breath ghost on your sensitive skin. you no longer hesitated to zip his pants down to feel more of his bulging dick, the warmth it emanates from your touch is enough to drive you crazier than ever. "i want it inside me." you tell him as your dominant hand reaches out to his head, pulling him closer to your face. vox immediately understood what you were trying to do, so he follows suit with your wish. he licks your sweet skin, following with light nibbling with his teeth leaving sloppy yet silent kisses all over your neck. you cover your mouth with a free hand and continue to stroke vox's dick. you feel it twitch everytime you'd glide your fingers underneath the tip of his dick. "you know i can't resist you." he says sternly as he carries your body and makes you sit atop him quickly to avoid suspicion from the other people, a whimper escapes your lips. "you know what to do." vox says as he strips his boxers down and lets his cock free of confinements, standing tall and warm, begging to be inserted in. you slowly stand up from his lap and rake your flowy yet short skirt up, showing vox your burgundy colored thongs that hugs the plush of your ass perfectly. "my fucking god, what a view." he cusses under his breath and wastes no time by putting his dick into your sopping hole right away with a light push. he supports your position by grabbing ahold of your arms and continues to pound in and out, making sure you're feeling him all the way in. "fuck vox . . my pussy really loves your dick i can't do anything about it." you tell him as you look back, seeing him smirk at your pleading, desperate face as he thrusts into your hole. "and that's just how it should be. if you were to be this crazy about others, i might just act up."

MYSTA 🦊 — "this shit is boring." he complains with no regard if he's heard by the other people or not with how loud his voice was. you try to silence him from talking shit any further by putting a finger on his lips but to your surprise, he opens his mouth and sucks on it instead, tongue so warm and slick, playing with your skin. he looks at you, gaze as bold as brass, licking every part of your index. "m-mysta!" you freak out but still managed to keep it in low tones. he decides to cut it out and laugh it off, "i'd rather play with your tits than being forced to watch this bs." your face crumples up, "my brother in christ you're horny." he nods and agrees, "yeah yeah, because you wore the easy access type and now i'm so tempted to do you." he pertains to the bodycon dress you're wearing as you try to pull down the hem to your knees. a hand immediately stops you from doing so, none other than mysta rias. this time, he puts a finger on his lips and whisper "shh. come with me to the restroom." his cerulean eyes glimmer from the movie lighting but then fading away as he stands up and casually descends from the series of theater seatings. your heart pounds faster the longer it took for him to disappear, but as you notice that his presence was gone, you do the same too and exit the cinema room. the bright white lights then welcome your vision, and a tall figure from your left awaits you. he approaches your slightly trembling body and holds your cold, sweating palms, "this is gonna be fun, trust me." he leads you to the restroom reserved for pwds, the spacious place is enough for you to have sex with him. "this is the dress that i bought for you, right?" mysta queries as he leans towards you, arms snaking around your waist and bringing your body closer to his.

you could feel the broad plane of his chest pressing against you, as well as his painful dick easing some attention from your hands down below. you hum in response, although something boggles your mind. "we can do it in a standard bathroom, why this one?" mysta pauses for a second but then goes back in track to tease you physically, he lifts up your tight dress and says, "relax, there are three restrooms of the same type. plus, our sex will be something different for now. today, i want you to move and lavish my dick completely." in a flash, your panties were stripped by his long fingers, a juicy wet surface seeps out of your naked folds. "i know you wanted to do something like this long ago, so here it is now. enjoy my dick~" he coos and sits on the toilet, his clothing stripped down as well. his cock twitches while he waits for you to come and sit on him like a good girl would. his brazen gaze at your figure felt as if he was ready to eat you up and his conceited grin was the cherry on top. you finally get on top of him and held his dick with your hands, lubricating it with your saliva you saved up earlier. you stroke it up and down to keep it in its full glory and hard like a metal rod, you look straight at mysta's eyes as you insert in in your hole. the both of you mewls from the feeling, you rock your head back from the immense pleasure you got upon the first step of riding him. you try to buck your hips to get used to the feeling and slowly hold onto the metal railings on both sides of the toilet as support to keep you sitting atop mysta's lap. "ah— i can't stop myself anymore." he chuckles in response, "you don't have to. we have thirty minutes left to have fun in here."

LUCA 🦁 — the more luca buried himself in the crook of your neck the more you could smell the scent of booze in your nose. you comb his blond locks with your fingers carefully, earning a hum from him in approval. "luca, are you drunk?" you ask right of the bat as you watch the scenes playing in front, getting cozy with luca to combat the cold atmosphere in the cinema. "drunk, hmm, no. tipsy, maybe?" he says, words uttered sloppily and with a strong accent. you almost snickered at how different his voice was but at the same time, aroused at how raspy and rough his voice chimed into your ears. "why didn't you tell me? we could've watched other movies in your house instead so you'll be comfortable." luca weakly shakes his head in opposition to your idea, "i had to something special for the stream a little while—" his explaining was cut off with a hic, "do you need some water?" you ask as you hand him a bottle of water when all of a sudden, he opens his mouths and crashes his lips on yours. caught off guard, you widened your eyes but couldn't do anything as luca was already stopping you with hise bulked up arms; the latex texture of his gloves brushing on your skin was eerily cold. he twirls his tongue and lightly sucks on yours, lavender eyes fluttered close, enjoying the momentum. you try to break the deep kiss by pulling away but to your surprise, your body reclines and fall down on the vacant seats beside you. luca as an opportunist, pins you down on the cushions still not stopping from giving you heated kisses. when he finally does so, a trail of saliva connects your lips to his pink ones, you try to catch your breath from how quick and heated the kisses were. "luca, we're in the cinemas. we're outside." the blond male hums in acknowledgment of your point "oh yes, you're right— i'm sorry." he withdraws from your figure. naturally, you were shocked at how he stopped just like that. really? just like that? truth to be told, the moment you feel him press his itching dick against your clothed region, it made you yearn for more so you were a little disappointed at how quickly he gave up.

"wait actually . ." you crawl back to him and lean in his face, "i kinda want more." you murmured. luca's cheeks instantly heats up at your words as he was left with no choice but to stand up and strip his slacks down in an instant. "i want to feel you inside me so badly right now." a satisfied smile creeps up on your lips as you remove your clothing as well and bend over on the cinema seat, ass perked up— the perfect position to insert himself in. "you look so pretty tonight." he says as he hastily pushes his cock inside your heating pussy, a pretty moan bubbles from your throat. thankfully, the movie you wanted to watch was the underrated type and so many people wouldn't attend to watch it. another bonus factor is: the timings. it was 7 in the evening and if you remember correctly, only seven people including you and luca availed for the tickets. you let yourself rock back and forth from how rough luca was pounding your hole, strings of endless mewls slip out of your mouth— almost drooling from how good it is for your feelings. "ahh— drunk you hits different."

SHU ☯️ — shu and you agreed to do naughty things in the theaters just for shits and giggles but in all honesty, it was because you won from an uno game you played yesterday and this was his punishment (although not really, but still, a punishment). it was receiving a blowjob from you but in the cinemas, a crowded one at that. you've always been a little adventurous, ready to risk things for added zeal and excitement altogether. you made sure to wear the prettiest, skimpiest and tightest clothing you can wear to seduce him and it was working. you were gliding your hands up and down his sturdy chest as you two tried to focus on the movie before you. every time you'd attempt to play with his nipples, he'd grab your hand and try to bear with the tantalizing feeling. it was all foreplay, even going as far as planting shortlived kisses on his neck, ending each one with slight sucking that his pale skin turned reddish violet. "god, your skin is so sensitive." you tell him, snickering at the end of your sentence. "i know i know, please carry on with it already and finish my suffering." he whimpers, eyebrows furrowed from the multiple sensations he'd been receiving. "if shu asks so, then i shall give." you finally get down on your knees to level yourself with shu's bulging pants. you strip him down with swift and ease, letting his lonely dick finally spring free. you lick your lips in anticipation and kiss the tip, slowly working your way down— at the same time spitting saliva you saved up earlier.

you bobble your head up and down as you take him in, mouth widened as much as possible because his cock was just too girthy for you to take lightly. it felt sloppy but good in a different kind of way, the more you deepened his cock in your mouth, the hornier you got just imagining his dick inside you. shu's hips buck up and down to create more friction and to pick up the pace while you gladly obliged. he was starting to feel better than the 'suffering' side, and immediately craved for more. "[name], how come you're so good at this?" he whines as he looks down on you, lilac eyes admiring such view. you decide to make him feel better as you deepened the blowjob, taking him all the way in, until his tip eventually reaches the deepest part of your throat. you feel tears in your eyes form yet you try to show him a caring, comforting smile— in order to make the experience one of a kind for him. "i-i'm cumming!" he says as he rocks his head back, overwhelmed all in all. you continue on sucking his dick and stroking it at the same time until you feel the taste of his cum splash in your mouth. carefully taking it out, you show him his liquid that you accumulated through dedication and hard work and swallowed it all. "looks like shu enjoyed the so-called punishment huh?"

IKE 🖋 — you've awaited this moment your whole life, and finally, ike agrees on a movie date. all tensed up from the waiting game guessing whether he'll reject it or not, an answer finally arises. he said yes. and now here you are, arm linked with his, enjoying his presence as you got to watch the movie you both wanted to see. apparently a couple of minutes later, the sound effects from the show silences and clapping noises reverberate inside from a distance. who in their right mind would even have sex at a horror movie? or perhaps you're imagining things? you turn to ike and shoot him a question, "ike— do you hear that?" he responds, "ah yes. it's normal in this country apparently. do you want to join in the fun too? i'm here anyways." in an unfazed tone, let alone his voice soft and low. you look at him, doubt and shock painting your expression. and most importantly, he said the last part as if it was something out of the norm? "i'm fine, it's okay." you shrug off the tempting desire to see the male feel good from your body, and also to make him absolutely whipped for you as you planned to. the movie continues, whoever may be doing the deed in the theaters are still on a roll and jump scares come minute by minute, your vocal chords nearing to surrendering every time you'd get spooked. "this movie is the creepiest and the scariest i've seen in a while!" you tell him and even though you used to love this genre of films and shows, you've never been this balls scared of one. "yeah true, the build up of suspense in this one is amazing." he laughs quietly but notices how you're barely watching the movie with two hands on your eyes. "actually— there is a trick i learned on how to be less scared of movies like these." he shares and it piques your interest. "just spread your legs and allow me to do the pleasure, alright?" your mind was already clouded from the brewing temptation of carnal desire from earlier and now that being scared shitless is added to the mix, you were unable to think thoroughly and let ike take the wheel. his hands snake up to your clothed region, fingers brushing up and down your clit.

you moan from the sensation, while ike's lush green eyes squint into two crescents, enjoying the noises that you're making. you heave a deep breath as you hold tightly on his arm, heart pounding against your chest. "go watch now, you won't be jump scared anymore in this way, no?" you bite your lower lip to try and restrain yourself from being noisy. you anchor your attention back to the movie while focusing heavily on not to let out any loud moans or else you'll be banned from the mall. ike pushes your panties aside and inserts three fingers all the way in, your back arches, pleasure and lust coursing through your veins. at the same time, a jump scare pops up in the frame and was ike right. you were too occupied from feeling the pleasure than focusing on the horror movie playing. little did you know, the same applies for him too. apparently, he was too busy making you feel good and indulging in the pretty noises you're making.

#luxiem smut #luxiem x reader #shu yamino #shu yamino smut #mysta rias #mysta rias smut #ike eveland #ike eveland smut #luca kaneshiro #luca kaneshiro smut #vox akuma #vox akuma smut #luxiem #nijisanji en

2K notes · View notes

featheredcritter · 1 year

Note

TALK TO ME ABOUT NICK MY DEARLY BELOVED MUTUAL

O_O oh hiii!! i shall put this under a read more because uh. it got long

Honestly one of the things I like to think\explore the most about Nick (but this goes for his whole species I suppose) is how different the world appears to him. He's a little guy, a prey animal, so the way he sees\interacts with the world is just so fundamentally different to a human. He might seem silly or unnecessary jumpy but for him even little things have a different impact on him, like the way a person moves, or how he can never be comfortable in a fully open room with no hides, or how he might "suddenly" or “for no reason” freak out, but instead something that might seem meaningless or insignificant to a human had startled him. Like everything can be so incredibly overwhelming in his pov!!!.

Even when perfectly safe and indoors he can’t help but look around and upwards constantly because his subconscious is always seeing invisible owls circling him, or how even in said safe and comfortable environment, he will still place himself in a way he can easily hide or escape if necessary. I even think his natural fear of humans still plays tricks on him sometimes, at which point it gets frustrating for Nick, because when he learns that humans are not bloodthirsty monsters he doesn't want to jump and be startled by their presence, plus the fact they have such different body language....yeah. Like you can't just look him in the eyes for too long or approach him confidently and directly or give him a toothy grin, especially when humans are so big to him, it freaks him out!!! but this feels like an easier thing to get around with just some clarifications and accommodations.

He does not have self esteem issues (if anything he's very proud of himself and his kind) but he is not confident, in the way he will hesitate to approach something he doesn't know or try new things even as a naturally curious person, because anything can mean danger to him, and he doesn't have the luxury of confidence that a human can have, like how some people will just pick up animals and shit and explore, He Can't Do That, in fact he thinks humans are out of their minds for their seemingly absence of self preservation instinct (untrue, especially considering the setting, but for Nick it still seems like that). Humans are confident!! They are tall and at the top, they don't have anything to fear, but Nick is at the bottom, he is jumpy and held back and cautious. (this also changes with the fact that humans in hl have very much LOTS to worry about between the combine and so on, they absolutely do not have all the freedom and laid back lives that Nick always thought they had, but the difference in…niche? is that a fair word to use? still makes this somewhat true).

I don't want to attribute all of this to Instinct, Nick is a pretty anxious man, but when you're in that position in nature you have to be full of natural phobias to keep yourself alive.Like I feel like I'm just rambling and struggling to convey what I mean but yeah T_T.

Or also i reaaally like to think about how he lives through the hl world. Like observing, studying and surviving alien wildlife, or scavenging an old, abandoned and infested building, or watching combine soldiers sweep the forest or being forced to listen to some rebels talk late at night because the place he wanted to take supplies from is still occupied. Like be them mundane or big things, just how he copes with the world he is in. And how he’s kinda ignorant of it too, he knows something happened, he knows the environment is not as healthy as it used to be, he watched species disappear before his eyes and lakes of toxic waste pool up around, he knows the humans are in a vicious war, but other than that? no clue, he doesn’t know just how massive and critical the situation is, how global. His life is far from easy and safe, but at the same time it all seems so small to the magnitude of what’s going on on earth, he really is just a simple survivor having to face immense cosmic horrors that, at least before being explained everything, were far beyond his comprehension.

#ocs #Nick #asks #hi hi sorry for making you wait i wasn't quite sure what to talk about because i have MANY thoughts about him all so different #so i picked these #i have infinite words about him

9 notes · View notes

muffindaddystyles · 3 years

Text

𝐑𝐎𝐋𝐄𝐒 𝐑𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐄𝐃

Author note: Mention of drugs, sickness and blood (if you're not comfortable with it don't read it) . It mighty be heart warming fluffyyyyyy.

You're his kitten. No matter the consequences you're. Cause even in his anger sometimes (which's rare and it's on the silly go-to's) he still sticks to that pet name because he met you like that under the bus stop's shelter in a heavy rain offered you an umbrella (while you were huffing and puffing like a kitten annoyed with the weather), walked you home, had a tea with you and some chocolate chip cookies. Been bestfriends from that year and there isn't a red light to your guys wild adventures—but he's been having a rough time recently. Had a cruel heart shattering breakup from a relationship that he thought was a never ending dream (she brought him happiness in a weird way he couldn't put into words) indeed it tightened your chest but his happiness's most important to you. To overcome it he's been scribbling notebooks over notebooks with lyrics that screams he miss her and the sex for the most part of it. It breaks your heart.

He's usually the one to melt all over you, give you forehead kisses, cuddles you when your periods are the bitchiest, makes you brekkie if he stays a night, runs you a bath and sometimes brings you pomegranate berried candles (he lies that he got them as a gift, he's one hell of a liar). He takes care of you with so much gentleness and helps you with study after wiping your tears and reassuring you telling you how proud he's of you. It made you guilty sometimes 'cos if you'd be in camille's place. . .you'd never be able not to get jealous. She was cool with it. Fills you with another curiosity that maybe she treated it like a fling.

He was devastated. Knocking on your door feebly. Then the moment your small confused body was under his weary gaze, boom!! It crashed upon him like a pitch storm and he fell to his knees tucking his head in your armpit crying his heart out. At that moment you felt his pain radiating to you and twisting your own stomach with a dagger, it was insufferable. He gave out no-deep scrapes but not to freak your bones muttered that he lost her. Eventually his bottled up emotions seeped into hues infront of you by passing week and to your littlest of information you got to know that they didn't ended up well in some perspectives so their relationship turned out to be a downfall. So As, you do with your girlie best-friend when she have a breakup you did it with Harry too. It didn't included feral clubbing (you left that part to his mates) but watching sappy movies that could fill your ice-cream bucket once you eat it whole, doing homemade face masks, playing drunk uno and knocking on your neighbours door to run way at last, dragging his arse to museum and in all of this you ended up convincing him to adopt a kitty (she lives with you thou).

The roles have been reversed completely!

He's been living at your flat for five weeks now. It's fading his usual cheekiness and the itch to annoy you every second he gets. Instead, it's just eating, spending bits of hours with you, going out with his mates and coming back to crash at your couch padding in your room in the wee of night demanding a warm coddle from you and that his back hurts from the cruelty of that single spring popping from the leather, staying with him when he'd wrench his stomach out in the morning. He's sensitive. His heart's soft that's one of the reason he gets hurt real quick, you admire that about him and reminds him that it's one of his qualities you're totally in love with. You're gentle with him. Giving him space and time to recover. Going with him at his friend's birthday little get together not drinking at all knowing one would have to stay sober as he chugged red wine staining his hawain shirt and when he clumsily poked his pink tongue out lazily to reach for the cigarette in her hand you tugged him back into you before he'd burn his tongue with sparkles announcing it's time to head back home and he'd be a pain in arse (a beautiful one though because his antics makes you all mushy) when he pretended to steal sandwiches from the table hiding them under his shirt saying that "'m pregnant with twins and it's hard to carry them" while you dragged him outside making him wear his coat like a stubborn toddler. Making him cupcakes sometimes, playing with his fluff of curls while he reads the book she gave him. It hurts. But, it subsides down with his single amiable glance that tells you he needs you. He always had. He always will. You give him extra forehead kisses and pecks on cheek while leaving for UNI, because it's irresistible to give dust to his pouty sulk.

It's seven in the morning when he tumbled through your door (has a key, you even brought his clothes and toothbrush from his house—he even uses your strawberry scented shampoo and body wash) his nose tip blushed matching his cheeks, eyes pooling with haze and hair poking in every direction. You were studying for a class you've in an hour. When you saw his irirses blown out you arched your brow putting the cup down beside your thick book, to mingle his sadness he's experimenting different fun wild things (told you bout it and you even called Mitch to take care of him).

"How many am I, pet?" You asked walking towards him seeing him struggle to get out of his vans and your giggles echoed into coldness when he peers down at your crouched state with his gold fish-y eyes, "dunno. . . but ye'r seem like. .like a-a sunflower floatin' in me head." His lips molding around his each word agonisingly slow drawl and his voice hoarse and scratchy. "You need rest, bambi." You got him out of his jeans and socks knowing he despises to sleep with layers on. "I'll be back with you in some hours. Hmm? Then we'll snuggle into blankets, you me and. . .salsa the pussy cat." You have to control your laugh everytime you take the kitty's name (Harry's worst at giving names you were horrified when he once joked that he loves chelsea boots so much he could name his daughter Chelsea) He whines at that nodding his head but not loosening his grip from around your wrist while you tucked him under your baby green patch work quilt. It's like his brain and heart can't decide how to choose.

On your way back you got Jeff's call asking why Harry isn't picking his phone his own voice resembling that of Harry's and you know he'd be looking shit at the time. Harry was still snoring out like a bulb in bright day on his tummy and you shook him gently at first but when he didn't woke up you had to be a bit harsher. "Harry wake up pet. . . Jeff's been calling ye for since." But, not even a hum in response so you placed your finger under his nose checking if he's even alive. Gratefully he was just sleeping like a literal corpse (he argues that he isn't that bad of a sleeper but in fact he is. Everything around him would burn down and he wouldn't even change a side).

It was seven in the evening when you were preparing for dinner when he woke up grumpy. His nose scrunched up, lips quirked up as if he tasted something yucky and his gait jello. You eyed him quietly even when he came in kitchen to drink water.

"Jeff was callin'. . ." You quipped stirring the veggies before pouring soup into a bowl and sliding it his way on the counter, "I know bombarded me phone with calls—" He gruffed spooning a mouthful and you flinched when he tried to cool it inside his mouth with "hawahhoohaha" little sounds (he knew it was hot, he's just an impatient leech).

"Stop being a gremlin. He told me ye' aren't writing, leaving everything like a cliffhanger neither you're attending the meetings he calls you at. . . I think you're done with your mourning it's time to do what you actually love and is there for you. Your music." You frown seriously trying to put some senses into his forever high brain. He drops the spoon back and dips his brows frustratedly, pinching his eyes shut.

"Fuckin' hell. Stop being my mama!" It's not the first time you guys are arguing and you're not gonna take it to heart. You stood up towering him and jabbing your finger to his chest, "you better stop filling your system with drugs before eighteen year olds come to you thinking you're a drug dealer—" He snickers at that a total mocking one (you know he's doing nothing hard it's just shrooms in the safe environment otherwise you'd have never never allowed him) but still you had to bring him back to his line so it was necessary. "Piss off." He mutters still slurping on his soup and you left him there with a loud smack on his head, "Wanker."

You care about him. Always did. Always will. He's the love of your life. Even your love has nourishment of just water and lacks sunshine from your sun it's still there into existence, how could you see him like this? Wasting his precious time and energy. It's impossible.

All you heard before going to deep slumber was the tinsy creak of your main door after that it was silent and darkness until now your phone buzzed under your pillow resonating Niall's tired words. You were a wreck havoc fumbling for your coat and wallet, covering pathway to tube with shivering legs hallucinating that everyone's eyeing your fiddly self with judgemental stare even though there're few.

You rushed to Niall's doorsteps knocking like a maniac, "where's he? Is he okay? told ye—" You pushed him aside marching inside to look for him. "He looked fine, he's a strong guy y/n they took him to hospital." You snaps your neck raising your brows.

"What the fuck, d'ya mean hospital!?" Your heart hammering in her ribcage overthinking the worst scenarios. "Take me there. right. fuckin' now." You tell him firmly not caring even if he's high too. Niall leads you to his car heating it up in the first beat taking glances of your petite body leaning against the glass with lips sucked in, eyes watered and legs constantly on bounce so placed his hand atop your knee giving you reassuring squeeze and a genial smile.

Your pink cheeks warming up with the heat of hospital radiating your way and loud growl left your chest when your blurry vision cleared to the sight of dishelved Harry sitting on the bench outside of ER, his irirses weary, mouth stuffed with cotton and has few scratches of rashes on his elbows otherwise he's fine. With each step of yours towards him something kept breaking inside you like you're walking on the nails and it's ripping you raw. He raised his head timidly hearing footsteps and when his eyes fell over your worried state panic flashed over his features and his only gaze turned you a puddling emitting heavy sobs within you before reaching towards him. The reality of situation dawning upon you because from what Niall told you in the car that they were high trying to have some fun, drove around neighbour hood and Harry jumped out of the window and bit his tongue between his teeth resulting in heavy bleeding a deep gnash (the fuckin' dumbstick he is).

"I hate you. I hate you so fuckin' much! you bastard." You tried to shout at him but the voice that came out of your mouth was that of mice as you threw harsh blows at his chest, bottom lip jutting wet and salty tears tricking down. He wraps his hand around your wrists ushering you closer down to his chest speaking muffled, "'orry." causing you to grunt angrily into the crook of his neck.

"Sorry my ass!" When you tried to pull back he tightened his hold round your neck snuggling you warmly to him with a hum. Jeff came back with medicines and when he parted his lips to speak in his defence you ignored him wiping your tears with the heel of your palms muttering a, "I hate you guys." The drive back was silent and the walk to your flat too, you passed by him to lock yourself into your room (you wouldn't because of the fact you wouldn't be able to sleep if not sure he's okay few feets away from you). When Harry attempted to roll his tongue to make some words nothing came out but a hiss making you spin, "'s okay we'll speak in the mornin'." Saying this you headed to bed and when you were bout to turn the lamp off he was lurking at the foot of your bed with a pillow in his arms smushing his face into it and squeezing it close to his chest gesticulating you that he wants a cuddle.

"Only 'cos y're adorable." You muttered moving your bum to make space for him suppressing your cooe when he grinned showing nothing but snow cotton, fuckin' hell being this cute should be illegal! He snapped his finger to call Salsa and she instantly galloped to shrink into his side while you spooned him. You woke up to the running tap and the time you were stretching under your quilt with yawns he padded out looking healed than last night.

He got a little lisp as he spoke, "can we talk?" You nodded knuckling at your sticky eyes criss-crossing your legs. "'Forgive me kitten." He continues, "sorry fo' mistreatin' ye' last night." You shake your head not realizing tears are dropping down your collarbones.

"Please. . .I don't wanna be a party-pooper in your life. you can live your life to finest but not at the sake of your life Harry– and. . . and if you're trying to invade the feelin' of sadness with all of this I don't approve it. What bout me? dunno what'll do if somethin' will happen to you, pet. S'not fair to me. is it? Just. . . love y—" your confessions cameflouging with sobs.

"Oh baby. ." He immediately cradled you in his embrace trying to soothe you with 'sorrys' and 'I'll never do somethin' like that again, promise'. Smooching slobery kisses all over your face and when you gazed up at him attracting him closer to your clean warm features all he did was peck the corner of your lips tenderly pulling away to pat your hair with a sigh.

"So. . .ye' love me." He teased you and you rolled your eyes grabbing his chin with your fingers, "show me your tongue." biting down your laugh when he retorted misheviously, "hmm. Wanna kiss it better?" Blowing him off with a remark that he's an utter pervert hiding the fact it splashed crimson to your neck.

"Mind makin' me poor self some brekkie?" He pouts and you giggled pecking the corner of his burgundy lips getting a timid smile in return, "in trade of?" He hip-checked you straddling Salsa over his shoulder and grabbing her little paws to expertise her in some dancey-dance moves.

"Mind bloggin' orgasm–ique dinner." He cackled loudly at the end when you shook your head in fake disappointment at him and he clinged by your side helping you to make some breakfast.

Think so you guys will figure it out.

157 notes · View notes

itamiiscribble · 3 years

Text

*HiSS* Chapter 4 [ PART 1 ]

_________________________________________

"I'm not moving my pink ass 𝘰𝘯𝘦 inch."

Mina is currently sitting (if you could call it that) on the couch in the common room, complaining about being too lazy and worn out to do anything more than 𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨.

It's Sunday afternoon, the day after the Birthday party and half of the class is currently either laying on the couches or sitting lazily, including you. The other half was either training or doing their own thing.

The conversation you all are having (and trying to convince Mina to join you all) is about going out for some drinks. No alcohol obviously, most of the squad is still hangover from last night. But it's still the weekend and no one wanted to spend their last day of the weekend in the dorms.

"Then you and your 𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘢𝘴𝘴 will stay in the dorms alone because the rest of us agreed on going." , states Kyoka with an eye roll from your right. You let out a hum in agreement, trying to sound as if you're following the dialogue. Because you actually aren't, you are too busy letting the memories of yesterday pass in your mind over and over again.

It was pure luck that Deku and Todoroki realized your absence at the party last night and decided to look for you. Apparently they were already on a search tour while you were- ... 𝘣𝘶𝘴𝘺 with Katsuki inside of the elevator. It didn't took long for them to realize that you were probably stuck in it because there were already lots of people in front of the elevator, complaining to a staff member.

So all in all you only had to endure being alone with Katsuki for a little while. It may sound not much, but it felt like a lifetime for you. Katsuki didn't try to talk to you, either out of consideration of your situation or because there was not much to talk about. You don't know, but you were grateful regardless. Because you didn't know if you could've been able to handle to talk with him after what had happened!

And yes, the picture of the both of you looking like a mess, coming out of the elevator 𝘵𝘰𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 would've been a shock to anyone in your class.

And it was, Deku's mouth fell open and he looked concerned right after. Todoroki's expression didn't change much, only from raising his eyebrows slightly you perceived that it had surprised even him.

You had stomped out and passed the both of them without saying anything. Yes, something you shouldn't have done, because that made our dear broccoli boy even more concerned and he had run after you.

But Deku was a smart boy, he knew exactly when to talk and when not to. So he just walked with you back to the party without asking a single question. That made you realize again how much you appreciated him.

And so, the night had continued, no one asked questions because most of them were too wasted to even realize your condition. And mostly because you gave your best at not showing it.

And now here you are, sitting in the common room with half of the class (Bakugou excluded, fortunately).

But apparently the conversation had ended because they all stood up and left the room.

"Wanna talk?"

You lift your head up and see Deku standing in front of you, he is looking down on you with his lips pressed into a thin line.

You knew it would come to this, so you let out a frustrated sigh and stand up.

"Yes, but let's take a walk outside."

Deku nods and and let's you lead the way. You guys walk for a while without saying a word, Deku was obviously waiting for you to say something. But how are you supposed to tell him that you had a freaking kissing session with the person you disliked the most in a freaking elevator?!

You can't just say: 'Yea hey, Katsuki said he likes me, then he kissed me and i kissed him back, in the elevator, all alone. And we kinda got off of it and started touching each other like freaking animals in heat. And i must say, i 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 liked it! '

No, you can't just blurt out something like this.

So instead, you take a deep breath and say:

"Bakugou told me that he likes me, then he kissed me, i kissed him back and i hate myself for not hating it."

....

Well done, (Y/N).

Deku halts in his track and looks at you slack jawed with his big green eyes. And the muttering begins:

"H-huh?! Kacchan?! Kacchan said he 'likes' you?! He kissed you?! But that makes no sense...? You guys are always fighting...But Kacchan actually...'likes' you? I didn't know! I didn't see! How...? And 'you' kissed him back... What does that mean...? But....?! So you guys are-"

"Deku, stop!", you interrupt him with a laugh and put your hands on his shoulder to shake him a little, trying to make him come back to 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 world. You couldn't resist laughing. His muttering looked always so funny to you. It was just 'so'... Deku.

"I didn't understand 𝘰𝘯𝘦 word Deku, as always. And yes, we kissed and he said he likes me. ", you summarise and let go of him. You put your hands on your face and let out an exhausted groan.

Broccoli boy's expression changes from shocked to worried and immediately he puts a hand on your shoulder, trying to comfort you.

"Hey... You okay?"

Damn. He is worried. And you don't like making people worry on your account. You are always the strong one. You barely get into moods like these.

Seeing you like this must be really worrisome.

You slowly let your hands slide down your face and give him a genuine smile.

Deku is just amazing. The perfect hero. You know you can count on him no matter what happens. You guys have been getting closer over the years and he was one of your best friends. So it's obvious why he is the first one you come to entrust your 𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 with.

You tell him everything while continuing your walk.

𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵 happened, 𝘩𝘰𝘸 it happened, how you 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭.

That you are angry. Angry at Katsuki and angry at yourself. That figuring out your emotions and Katsuki's action tires you out. That you start seeing Katsuki different now and that it scares you. That being scared of something 'that' stupid pisses you off. That you want to punch Katsuki in the face.

Hard.

And after telling him all of this, Deku says the words you were afraid of hearing but knew it would be coming.

"You have to talk to him. Confront him."

You groan dramatically and come to a stop. Deku continues walking a few steps and then turns around, looking you intensely into the eyes.

"I know... But... How? It's hard for me to be in his presence these days. And i 𝘩𝘢𝘵𝘦 the way he makes me feel. .... I think."

Suddenly you look him dead serious into the eyes.

"Shit. I know my second weakness now. It's physical contact."

Deku bursts out laughing at your serious expression.

"And what is your first weakness?", he asks, still laughing.

You give him a look of fake disappointment.

"'𝘍𝘰𝘰𝘥 of course?!"

Deku bursts out laughing again, this time louder. You can't hold back and join him.

Ahh...this feels good.

After the laughter dies down, Deku comes closer and graps onto your shoulders, regarding you with a serious face.

"Back to the main topic. (Y/N), this is serious. You can't allow Kacchan to say and do whatever he wants. You have to confront him. You need to know what his intensions are with you."

You groan dramatically yet again and give him an anguished expression.

"Besides, the (Y/N) 𝘐 know wouldn't run away from a problem like this. She is strong willed and determined."

You look him into the eyes and see how much the green haired boy means it. He really believes in you. And again, you are so glad that you have someone like Deku on your side.

You snicker and hit him softly on the chest. Deku takes a step back and gives you a genuine big smile.

"You are amazing, you know that?" You hit him again and both of you start giggling while Deku refuses to acknowledge your compliment.

After talking to your best friend you feel like something heavy has been lift off of your body and you can breathe better again.

Deku is right, you deserve the truth. You can't allow Katsuki to play with you like this. You need to figure out his true intentions.

While walking back to the dorms, Deku keeps on trying to make you feel better, telling you stuff that had happened yesterday at the party.

Right when you are about to grab the doorknob, the door opens from the inside and Katsuki is standing right in front of you.

You look up to him and immediately feel small again.

He is 𝘮𝘢𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘷𝘦. You never really realized how tall he had become... And so muscular...And so.... (Damn it) handsome.

Swallowing hard you remember what Deku told you.

Broccoli boy is still standing behind you, so you can't see his face. You don't have the strength to turn around to decipher his expression because Katsuki has your 'full' attention.

His piercing garnet red eyes are looking straight into your own.

Blinking a few times to destroy this invisible force that has you locked in a paralyzed state, you take another step towards him and hold your head high.

"We need to tal-"

Your sentence ends with a loud shriek of suprise when Katsuki grabs onto your wrist and forcefully drags you inside of the building, making you walk (run!) behind him.

"K-kacchan?!"

Deku's voice makes everyone in the common room look up from their seats. And you can only detect a few blurred worried faces in your vision because Katsuki is walking so fast!

Wait, was Kirishima just smirking?!

Katsuki is dragging you so fast behind him, you have to be careful not to miss steps when he leads you up the stairs.

Finally finding the strength to say and do something you grab onto the hand that is currently holding on your wrist.

"What do you think you are doing, Bakugou?! Let go of me!"

Katsuki isn't even listening to you, leading you straight to the area in which the boys have their rooms.

Realizing that, you panic. Why is he dragging you there?!

"H-hey! ", shouting out you still try to free yourself, but to no avail. You can't even see what kind of a face he is making because he is walking in front of you.

Why is no one following you guys?! Is no one concerned of your well being?!

Remembering Kirishima's smirk you suddenly realize he is in this too.

Internally you take a note to beat the shit out of 'both' of them as soon as this is over.

Katsuki comes to a halt so fast that you bump right into his backside.

𝘖𝘶𝘤𝘩.

Hearing him opening a door, your panicked state gets worse.

When the door opens he drags you inside and (finally!) let's go of your wrist and closes the door behind him.

So, here you are, inside of a room with Katsuki Bakugou. You are alone with him, 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯.

Wait, this is his room, right? It must be. What the-

But instead of letting the panic control your body, you try to calm yourself and you give him a vicious look.

"Explain yourself.", you demand and take another step back. The more space between you two, the better.

Katsuki leans against the door and crosses his arms on his chest. His eyes represent calmness, disinterest even. But his mouth gives him away. He has them pressed into a thin line, obviously struggling with something.

"'God, you are a pain in the ass."

......

𝘏𝘶𝘩.

He takes his arms from his chest and runs one hand through his hair. This way he looks a little.... troubled.

But you won't let your guard down. Hell no.

"Why did you drag me here, Bakugou. You know i'm not allowed to be here! "

At that he quickly raises his head and gives you a furious look which makes you instantly take another step back.

𝘚𝘵𝘰𝘱 𝘣𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘴𝘰 𝘸𝘦𝘢𝘬, (𝘠/𝘕)!

"Do you know how fucking hard it is to find you alone? You are always with those nerds whenever i try looking for you. It's a pain in the ass."

Oh, so he wanted to be alone with you...

Still, this doesn't mean he has the right to 𝘢𝘣𝘥𝘶𝘤𝘵 you like this!

"But...why can't you just approach me like a normal human being and ask me to have a talk?"

He grunts in annoyance and avoids looking into your eyes.

You almost burst out laughing.

𝘊𝘶𝘵𝘦....

𝘚𝘵𝘰𝘱 𝘪𝘵, (𝘠/𝘕)!

Seeing the twitching of your lips Katsuki puts on his usual pissed off expression and takes a step towards you.

"Whatever. I have you now. And we need to fucking talk."

He's is standing not two meters away from you now, looking down on you, which makes you feel so small and vulnerable again.

You want to continue on feeling threatened, really. But the atmosphere has changed and you just can't stop thinking about the "I have you now" part...

You don't know why it makes you feel some certain way...

So you just stand there, looking up at him like an idiot, 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯.

𝘎𝘰𝘥, 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘋é𝘫à 𝘷𝘶.

Katsuki raises a brow at your silent behavior, obviously had not been expecting you to act this way right after he 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘤𝘦𝘥 you into his room.

You clear your throat and raise your head, trying to look at ease.

"You are right, we do." You are glad your voice doesn't waver. Having gathered enough strength to finally confront him, you ask him the most important question.

"Why do you like me?"

You don't know what you expect him to say, but you definitely weren't prepared for this;

The moment the question comes out of your mouth, he stands still. He doesn't move an inch, he is only looking into your eyes. As if the answer to your question lays behind those beautiful piercing red eyes.

He looks so vulnerable that it makes your breath hitch in your throat. You've never seen this side of him, and you doubt anyone ever came to see it.

Until now.

Your body moving on it's own, you take a step forward, which makes Katsuki blink in surprise and retreat a step.

You stand still, you don't know what you were about to do. But his expression had made you want to get closer to him...

"Fuck!"

.... Okay.

You are about to open your mouth to ask what's wrong but Katsuki is faster.

"I'm not good at fucking expressing myself. I just- fuck. It just fucking happened. I...fuck!"

... Alright, those are lot of 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘴.

To be honest you kind of expected him to deny it. That he would tell you that he was just fucking with you, that it's to piss you off. But seeing him like this; all flustered and trying to find the right words to express himself you realize he really means it...

But... Why so suddenly? How come he treated you like trash three weeks ago and now he is telling you that he likes you?

You don't really know what to say, so your mouth blurts out the first thing that comes into your mind.

"You do realize it's hard for me to believe that, right?"

His expression changes from vulnerable to angry and he comes closer again, standing right in front of you now. Your vision is fixated on his chest and his scent immediately gives you flashbacks of last night.

The way he had tasted... The way his body felt...

𝘚𝘵𝘰𝘱 𝘪𝘵, 𝘣𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘯!

[Continue reading PART 2] :

#katsuki bakugou x female reader #bakugou x reader #katsuki bakugou #katsuki bakugo fic #bnha fic #bnha #mha #my hero acadamy #boku no hero academia #katsuki x y/n

8 notes · View notes

sweetescapeartist · 3 years

Text

MY DBS MANGA CHAPTER 72 REVIEW... 😒

Hey there... Here comes the review.

Imma start like this and use language some ppl may find offensive. Goku, Vegeta, & Granolah are retarded. Now that that's out of the way, time to dissect this "Dragon Ball Super coloring book."

Goku & Vegeta land on the planet & its peaceful. How are they not immediately suspicious? They see that the planet isn't in danger & no death. Its obvious they need to ask a question to figure out what lies they've been told.

I was gonna say its dumb for Granolah to be able to supress his ki because it seems only Earthling have that kind of spiritual understanding. But Namekians have that spiritual understanding too so maybe Monaito taught Granolah how to suppress his ki.

I lost interest in the Heeters' past. You can only tease me so long until I stop caring. At least mention something like Freeza almost killed Gas on planet Cereal so now that's why Gas keeps trying to get stronger. There's so little info about "important" stuff that's supposed to be important. Give readers a tease, hint, a different hint, some valuable info, then another hint, then a reaveal (or something similar!) Instead its tease, hint, tease, tease, hint, tease...

In all honesty, the chapter didn't even need that page with Gas & Elec. When Maki said Gas & Elec are coming, that was all we needed to know. Then we anticipate their arrival in the next chapter. Showing them is a waste of time & they add no real purpose to the chapter. That was just a waste of ink.

Also I'm bored of Gas now. He only looks interesting but does nothing. 👎

Granolah shoots at Goku & Vegeta. Base Goku closes his eyes to use UI (UI Omen?) while Vegeta goes SS. Base Goku dodges easier than Vegeta. Goku is leagues beyond Vegeta.

A better way to have Goku & Vegeta encounter Granolah would be for him to snipe at them right when they get off the ship. Granolah wanted to kill them so bad so why wait for them?

Somehow they go towards Granolah but he's too fast for them & they lose him. They can't sense him firing ki for some reason. Idk why Goku didn't use Instant Transmission when Granolah shot ki at them?

I don't get why Goku closes his eyes either. Its as if Goku can't use UI now unless his eyes are closed but that wasn't the case before. Eyes were opend when using UI Omen & Mastered UI. Toyo could have conveyed that better but instead he's making Goku close his eyes like how Roshi covered his eyes when fighting those prisoner women because their beauty distracted him. Is Goku distracted by Granolah's beauty or something?

Wait a sec... I gotta backtrack real quick. Goku used the Ultra Instinct technique in his base & didn't go into Ultra Instinct Omen? But thats him using it in base right? Oh boy... This is about to get dumb...

Ultra Idiot Goku & Super Stupid Vegeta are surprised that the guy having the title of "strongest in the universe" is capable of moving faster than them when they aren't at full power. Such genius writing.

Goku gets shot in the neck... & it knocks him out... Ok. But later Granolah comments on how Goku's body moves on it's own before Goku can even process an attacks. Not to mention Goku & Whis have said the same thing. Goku should be untouchable at this point, but for some reason he is not.

So, Vegeta takes a senzu bean from his "training bra" and gives it to Goku. For some reason they decided to only take 2 senzu when knowing they would fight a guy possibly stronger than them. Stupid monkeys.🐒 (I'm starting to sound like Freeza now)

How did unconscious Goku eat a senzu? Yaoi fans would had loved it if Vegeta chewed the senzu up for Goku and fed it to him. Sorry, it just reminded me of Trunks spitting senzu mush into Mai's mouth since she was unconscious.

Then we have this dialogue from "sensei" Vegeta, The Ultra Instinct Expert...

"You rely on Ultra Instinct too much! If you haven't perfected it yet, then dodge using your mind!" - Vegeta

"Yeah, you're right..." - Goku

"WTF Toyotaro!" - DB Meta

... I'm unsure who is the stupid one in this situation. Is it Goku or Vegeta? It could be Vegeta because UI is the ultimate technique that allows you to move without thinking. But Vegeta says that because Goku hasn't perfected Ultra Inst-...

...

Sorry, I had to restart my brain...

Didn't... didn't Goku master Ultra Instinct? Silver hair? Silver eyes? MASTERED/PERFECTED ULTRA INSTINCT? Before that, Goku perfected Ultra Instinct Omen & could go in it at will... So, Goku is listening to Vegeta tell him he hasn't mastered UI? But both know that Goku did master UI? What does Vegeta know? Vegeta can't even use UI.

I almost stopped reading the rest of the colouring book when I got to that dialogue.

Also, Granolah wants to kill Saiyans, so why is he holding back and not hitting them with deadly attacks. He only needs one alive anyways. He said so himself.

At least there was a good pose Goku was in. The art looked nice there.

Now here's another place I almost quit reading. Granolah apparently has all the abilities of Goku & Vegeta. Hack writing. Sounds like a Moro, 7-3, & Cell copy cat. Toyo just cant leave the Cell saga alone.

Granolah is bumping his gums & rattling his tongue (old slang for "talking a lot") but when Vegeta asks if Granolah holds a grudge against Saiyans, Granolah suddenly says that's enough talking. He responded to them 3 times & spoke like 5 sentences to them. If you're gonna chat then chat. If you hate Saiyans then don't say anything to them & try to kill them. Dummy.

Granolah uses Hakai. But aparently he's not using Hakai or Instant Transmission. Its just "similar." Sure. Confirms that he has been using something similar to UI in previous chapters too.

Granolah says they're stronger than expected because they escaped into the air. Escape doesn't equal strenght. Mai escaped Goku Black, doesn't mean she's extremely strong.

But seriously, Vegeta saying he's gonna prove his training is better than Goku is stupid. He wants to prove he is better than Goku yet he tells Goku to fight first (that's beta). It's as if he isn't confident & wants Goku to wear Granolah out first, so he can come in and look impressive. Kinda like in RoF after Freeza was tired from fighting Goku & Vegeta wasn't tired at all & he easily beat Freeza up. Looked cool, but actually wasn't too impressive.

Granolah saying that he's gonna shoot them if they don't fight him is ridiculous. Why is he showing mercy to the tribe that didn't show his ppl mercy? Why give chances to the ppl you wanted revenge on for years? Realistically he would just start blasting at them.

Unecessary dialogue from Vegeta talking to himself about how he needs to learn who Granolah is. Show don't tell Toyo.

Why is Granolah waiting for the Oozaru form? Maybe he wants to kill them in that form? What about revenge? Just kill them.

Goku screamed to power up from SS to SSG. That's possibly dumb, but I gotta let at least 1 thing slide this chapter.

Why did Granolah let them power up? So unlike what we've been shown what Granolah is like. Why would he want to give "murderers" of his entire race a fair chance to fight him?

Next, Goku doesn't try to explain he isn't savage like other Saiyans when Granolah accuses his kind of being so. Instead Goku just agrees & says "Oh... Yeah." I guess he really just wants to fight. I can't tell if this is OOC or just magnifying a Saiyan flaw of Goku just to push the story along. Idk. I'm losing brain cells reading this chapter.

Granolah's fighting stance is cool. Hey, look. I said a nice thing. (But why is he doing close combat when being a sniper us his specialty?)

So, Goku uses UI in SSG form... Bruh, is Ultra Instinct a technique, a state of mind, or a transformation? I'll tell you what it is. ULTRA INSTINCT IS A PLOT DEVICE! It does whatever Toyotaro decides at the moment. So freaking inconsistent... 😓😒

Ultra Instinct becomes more accurate when in conjunction with a SS form?! How tho? I thought it was just a goldy technique that needed a clear mind and control or whatever. Or is UI a transformation like Toyo stated many times in previous chapters, while also calling UI a technique? How can mixing a godly "technique" with a SS form enhance it better than Goku simply using UI Omen? It doesnt! Vegeta, you can just shut up! Every time you talk about UI, you've been wrong! It should be illegal impersonating an UI Expert.

Goku is using the Ultra Instinct technique in base form against Granolah.

UI Omen is Goku using the Ultra Instinct technique in base form.

Goku uses Ultra Instinct technique in the Super Saiyan God transformation.

Mastered UI is Goku mastering the technique or maybe using the technique as a transformation? (Toyo is confusing.)

So why isn't Goku going into UI Omen when using UI in base? Why does Vegeta say "Ultra Instinct... becomes more accurate when used in conjunction with a Super Saiyan form"? Does that mean Mastered UI is a Saiyan form in conjunction with the Ultra Instinct technique? So, there's an unknown silver haired Saiyan transformation that Goku was utilizing in conjunction with Ultra Instinct? I guess this confirms that "Super Saiyan Blanco" is real y'all.

I suppose that if UI in base isn't the same as UI Omen, then by that logic, there is also an unknown "Super Saiyan Noir" form we haven't seen yet.

I'm done with Ultra Instinct in the manga. Toytaro doesn't know if UI is a technique or a transformation. I could explain it better than him, but I'm not tye one writing official material. Why should I make sense of his bad writing when he will change things later? HE should explain it clearly to US. He is extremely inconsistent with his explanations and will change them when he feels like it.

I dont care what Geekdom101 says about UI being both technique & transformation, because Ultra Instinct IS NOT a transformation nor a technique anymore. ULTRA INSTINCT IS JUST A PLOT DEVICE. 😑

[You can skip this little section. I'm talking about inconsistencies from the Moro arc]

I remember when I talked about how Moro's life draining powers were retconned multiple times.

Moro can absorb life energy from a planet while he is in outer space, then he is nerfed to only being able to take life energy by directly touching you, later Vegeta says they need to get off the ground because now Moro (who is stronger and fused with the planet) can only steal your life enrgy while making contact with you. He could absorb life energy from entire planets from space, but has to make contact with somebody once he got stronger?

Let's not forget it's said Moro drains life energy, but can't drain 17 & 18 because they say they don't have life energy. I guess that means Krillin had a daughter with a dead woman? No. Multiple times, 17 & 18 contributed to the Genki Dama (a collection of life energy). Goku gathers energy from trees, animals, ppl, everything living. This means 17 & 18 do have life energy because they are living beings. But the energy they fight with is unlimited artificial energy.

So if 17 & 18 can give life energy to Goku for a Genki Dama, then Moro should be able to take their life energy just like anyone else. What he can't take is their energy they use for battle because itsunlimited & artificial. Toyotaro does not understand this important detail nor does he understand many other details about these iconic character. So why is the the writer if he is getting so much wrong? Why is he not soley the artist?

Goku uses UI in SSG form to dodge a barrage of attacks from Granolah that are aimed at the planet. They must be weak attacks because the explosions are tiny. Is Granolah really trying to kill them?

Goku using UI in SSG but somehow gets caught off gaurd. Did UI just get nerfed so that Vegeta can look like he is on the same level as Goku in a later chapter? I think it did...

Granolah took Goku down a second time... Wow Goku, you kinda suck. In DBS CH 65 on page 11, after Moro broke his arm on UI Goku's chest, Whis said "When Ultra Instinct is honed to this extent, the body will automatically grow sturdier as necessary." Why is Goku holding back against the strongest in the universe? Oh yeah, that's right... UI is getting nerfed.

Vegeta, what do you mean "How is he learning Kakarot's weaknesses so quickly?" Everybody has similar vital spots in DB. Thats not learning, thats just knowing. Are you just a dummy, Vegeta? Do you not know where vital spots are?

Granolah can tell Goku's body is moving before his brain tells him to react. Granolah the UI "expert" can see all with his eye. You know who else can see with their eye? Tien. Speaking of Tien, I wanna go back to Earth now. What's Piccolo doing? I bet everyone on Earth is chilling or at work. Is it bad I'd rather watch Gohan at a conference than watch Goku, Vegeta, & Granolah be dummies? I'd rather watch Chi-Chi cooking with vegetables instead of watching vegetable puns fight a cereal pun. I'm sorry, the dialogue is just so bad...

How does Granolah's right eye being able to observe blood flow & muscle movements let you know where to strike? Dude, vital spots are where your organs are, & pressure points, & your head area, & you arteries, & so on. Ya ain't gotta observe blood flow to know that. Granolah just making stuff up now to sound cool. News flash, you failed. If he was sniping and able to track them based on blood flow and muscle movement, then that would had been smarter writing.

Granolah: "This right eye of mine is the sharpest in all the universe. It sees all."

Your eye sees all Granolah? Can you see past the Heeters feeding you bullcrap too?

Yo, where did Granolah's barely existing personality go? He wss once driven by revenge, and now the opportunity for revenge is right here in front of him & he's acting like he doesn't want it. If revenge is his only noticeable personality trait, what happens when you take it away? You get bland and dry Granolah.

So then Veget- hold on! Thats it! Granolah's name pun is granola because he is meant to be a bland character! I get it now! So all his moves must be cereal puns!

I never realized how genius this character is!

Detective Vegeta: "A tribe driven to extinction, known for their evolved right eyes... This is starting to sound familiar..." 🕵

Tien?! Oh wait... he said right, not 3rd eye. Jiren?! Oh wait, that's both his eyes... Jaco!? That's both eyes too... I give up.

Granolah's eye can tell that Goku is not using his full power, yet he can't tell he is being fooled by the Heeters. I think he needs new glasses or at least clean the revenge smear off of his monocle.

Granolah casually chats with a Saiyan who is one of the ppl he wants to kill. He would be better if he barely talked and just acted. Granolah should be like Iron Man in "Captain America: Civil War." Not trying to talk, just trying to kill because he is angry and wants revenge.

Goku: "Granolah, we don't work for Freeza & the two of us didn't attack your planet."

Granolah: "I dont care... Your people killed my family."

Boom! Gimme an award!

Back to the chapter 72 colouring book...

Granolah: "Hurry and get on with it. I have no duty to wait for your sake."

Yet you've been waiting all this time for them to arrive, fight them, chat with them, & even waiting for him to transform right now. You got time. You got 3 yrs to waste. You can chat for 10 minutes or so.

Granolah tells Goku that he doesn't have time to wait, then says "It's no skin off my nose to kill you where you stand." Then he waits for Goku to transform... Just kill Goku and be done with it already. Its not like Vegeta can win if Goku can't.

Granolah: "I dont have time for talk."

Goku: "Ok lets fight!"

Granolah: "Ok but, let me tell you about what my eye can do. I'm really proud of it. Mind if I talk a bit? So I sacrificed my life to defeat Freeza, the guy you're working for."

Goku: "What? You don't like Freeza? You're not a bad guy?"

Granolah: "Shut up Saiyan! You'll pay! Fight me!"

Granolah doesn't want to talk about Freeza all of the sudden when Goku implies they both have been tricked. Granolah becomes stupid just so the fight continues. There's a better way to keep them fighting. SHUT UP, GRANOLAH! If he talked less then convoluted stuff like this wouldn't happen.

Granolah yells "Take this!" He powers up instead of doing an attack... Why yell "take this" then power up if you aren't gonna attack right away? You even knocked Goku out of SSG, so now is the perfect time to finish him.

Blah blah blah, Goku goes SSB and they fight, blah blah blah.

Hey look! In my last review I said something about the planet should shake or be in danger from the battle. Looks like Toyo made the planet shake from the battle. Good job. I like this detail. Will it matter later on? Probably not.

Also, ya notice how god ki and god transformations are limited in this chapter? It seem they got too powerful for there to be any stakes. So we see Vegeta in base & SS. Then we see Goku in base, SS, SSG, base, & SSB so that false tension can build. Its smart but the dialogue doesn't compliment this smart tactic.

Aparently Vegeta doesn't care about the fight. Detective mode activate! (🕵) Vegeta standing in that Oozaru footprint looks like he's in Jurassic Park lol. But why did Detective Vegeta have to touch the footprint? He could had just looked at everything when he was high up and had a bird's eye view. Did Detective Vegeta taste the soil & gain knowledge by tasting the past?

Detective Vegeta: "I think I know who he is."

The Heeters said his name is Granolah, dummy. Shouldn't you say "I think I know what happened here." or something like that? Gimmie your detective hat, your trench coat, your bubble pipe, & you magnifying glass! You give detectives a bad name! I'll give this to somebody more deserving, like Jaco, Videl, Krillin, or Hit.

Did ya notice that Vegeta didn't get hit once but Goku who is using UI gets hit multiple times? Vegeta tells Goku to think instead of use UI? Oh yeah, this chapter was to pander to Vegeta fans. Toyo is poorly trying to convey he is equal or above Goku somehow. Like Vegeta mastered his training but Goku hasn't despite having mastered UI as a transformation thingy.

In conclusion, I was right. Freeza still hasn't been seen yet. Show a pic of him in somebody's thought bubble at the very least. This is all happening because if his influence y'all. Still no visual of Freeza yet... Whateva.

This chapter was wack. Too much unintelligent & unreasonable & unrealistic & unnecessary dialogue, plot went nowhere, Goku is being handicapped so the fight can continue, everyone are stupid idiots, Vegeta is being built up to lose his battle or get lucky & win. No image of Freeza still... This was just a very, very boring chapter.

I expect the next chapter to be boring too. Probably won't see Freeza either.

Prediction

Goku got knocked down twice by Granolah, Vegeta decided to fight second, Granolah said he doesn't need to keep Goku alive, & Vegeta told Goku he should stop relying on UI... Sounds like UI is getting nerfed & Goku is gonna need to be saved by Vegeta so that Vegeta can show off his Hakai training in comparison to UI.

#dbs manga #dbs #review #wtf toyotaro

8 notes · View notes

luckyvirgo · 4 years

Text

many reasons; dazai osamu

DAZAI OSAMU X READER

In hindsight, you should have realised that running after Dazai was not a good decision on your part...

WORD COUNT: 1.8K words

WARNINGS: mentions of suicide, abuse (not reader's), angst (if you squint), fluffy ending. MILD SPOILERS FOR BUNGO STRAY DOGS SEASON 3

(e/c) - eye color

A/N: sorry if the formatting is a bit wonky!! i'm posting this on mobile because tumblr doesn't work on my stupid, old laptop.

this fic is really super, self-indulgent because dazai is my favorite in bsd and i love when situations like the one in this one shot happen in anime, so i combined the two things and wrote this. this was actually going be a scene in a dazai fic i'm thinking of posting on my wattpad, but i decided to scrap it and write it as a oneshot. i hope you all enjoy reading this!!

Also shoutout to @neonghxst who wanted me to finish this one shot hehe. thanks to her, i got the inspiration to actually write this and finish it.

"Are you sure we should have left him like that?"

You fiddled with the ends of your coat sleeves. Upon hearing about Atsushi's new case and the end result, you immediately wanted to give the boy a hug and never let him go. He had been through so much these past few weeks and hearing about the death of that abusive headmaster of his old orphanage must have been incredibly painful.

But Dazai had promptly pulled you away, after saying exactly what needed to be said. (He always knew what to say in any kind of situation and that made you feel jealous a lot of times)

"Things like that are meant to be dealt with alone. Atsushi-kun will manage," Dazai answered with a cool tone. "You worry too much, (Y/N)-chan."

He tried to ruffle your hair but you slapped his hand away with a huff.

"I have every right to worry, you know," You crossed your arms, angrily staring at the ground. You and Dazai had already left the port area and now were back in the city, walking next to each other. "He and Kyouka just...I just wanna give them both a hug and adopt them as family."

This time, Dazai successfully managed to ruffle your hair."You are very funny, (Y/N)-chan."

"I'm not being funny! I'll actually adopt them, just you wait and see."

"As amusing as that would be, I'm gonna stop you there."

"Why?"

"Well, it's nighttime now. And we are almost near the river. The moon's pretty bright today. Which means one thing and one thing only."

"What, Dazai?"

"It's the perfect time for a double suicide!"

Dazai suddenly grabbed you by the waist and spun you around. You felt your face grow warmer as he kept his hands on your waist, meanwhile going on about the benefits of a double suicide.

"D-dazai! Let go!" You physically tried to struggle out of his grip, knowing that your Ability was useless in this situation. "Just let go, dumbass!"

"Nope, not gonna."

Dazai let go of your waist, but then immediately grabbed your hand. But you managed to pull it away. He stuck his tongue out at you. "You are no fun, (Y/N)-chan."

You glared at him. "How many times do I have to tell you no, you bandage squandering idiot?!"

"Ahh!! You sound so much like Kunikida-kun! Why didn't you tell me you were so great at impersonating others?"

"Huh?! What's that supposed to mean?" You went to shove his shoulder but he dodged it, jumping aside with his annoying (endearing) laugh. You tried to hit him again, but he dodged this time too and started running.

"Oi, Dazai! Come back here, you idiot!"

You ran too, trying to catch up to him so that you could, at least, flick his forehead before slapping him. Why was he so annoying, you always wondered.

'Isn't this why you like him?' Your heart whispered to you.

'Shut up,' You told it.

You kept on running. Even as you did, the sun had almost set, taking its red and orange hues and replacing it with the dark, navy blue of the night sky. The running brought you to the river bank, a spot where both you and Kunikida had to drag Dazai out of. For some reason, he declared this spot and drowning as his top favorite for a double suicide.

It was incredibly annoying, but at the same time, also incredibly saddening and you wished you knew more about why he was like this.

Finally, you caught up with him.

In hindsight, you should have realised that running after Dazai was not a good decision on your part.

Both of you stumbled down the river bank, holding onto each other because there was nothing else to grab onto. The slant river bank ended and they were on flat ground again.

But...but, both of you were in a rather compromising position.

Usually, you were a pretty confident and self-assured person. But when it came to situations like these (or any romantic situations)…well, you were still pretty inexperienced. So inexperienced actually that you hadn't kissed anyone in a long while, almost two years to be exact. Relationships had always seemed like a waste of time to you, but being in such close proximity of the man you currently yearned for was doing wonders for your heart. (In a good way and a bad away)

Dazai's arms were on your shoulders, pinning you to the ground. He loomed over you, his brown eyes staring right into your (e/c) ones.

You swore you could detect something there before it was hidden behind his mask again.

No longer were you able to keep the warmth away from your face. You knew you probably resembled a tomato right now. You wanted to get out of this position quickly, but deep down, your mind and your heart both resisted. And you felt like agreeing with them this time. You wouldn't get a chance like this ever again.

So you decided to speak.

And immediately regret it.

"Your eyes are pretty," The combined forces of your heart and mind make you say something stupidly embarrassing and you immediately want to cover your face. But you can't. So you continue.

Even the darkness of night couldn't keep the redness of your cheeks hidden.

"I mean, they're not just an ugly brown color. They have this amber-like quality to them. And everytime light hits them, they almost shine and it makes them more beautiful than I ever thought. Like seriously, you have really beautiful eyes. Personally, your eyes are your best feature and they're one of the many reasons I fell for you."

(You wanna crush your own stupid heart for that last bit.)

"Oh?" That was all Dazai said, that stupidly endearing smirk on his face. "Many reasons? What are they again?"

"Um, uh," You hesitated, turning your head to the side. This was more embarrassing than any other situation you had ever been in. There was nowhere else to go and while you could have kicked Dazai away with ease, truth be told you really didn't want to do that. How many chances like this would you ever get? "I don't even know when I started liking you. And maybe it's a stupid thing because nothing is ever going to come out of it, but yeah. I have feelings for you, Dazai Osamu. Truth be told, I can sort of understand why you ask women to commit a double suicide with you. You want someone to be by your side, right? You don't want to be lonely when you die. I guess I can understand that, though I wish I could show you the joy in living. But I don't think I'll ever be able to change your mind."

You laughed nervously, looking anywhere but at Dazai's face, where his smirk had been replaced by a more serious look. "I went on a totally different tangent there, didn't I? You can forget that last bit but to sum up everything, I have feelings for you. I don't expect you to return them anyways so...yeah."

Now, you looked at Dazai. His expression was unreadable. You couldn't understand what emotions were written on his face. You didn't even know what he would do next. Would he reciprocate your feelings? Would he reject them? What would he do? You wanted answers and you weren't getting them.

Then again, it was partly your fault also. You suddenly sprung these feelings on him. You shouldn't expect him to answer quickly.

(Secretly, you also thought that Dazai wasn't the type of person who'd ever truly love someone. It was just your stupid luck he was the person you fell for.)

Unexpectedly, Dazai suddenly moved off you, giving you the opportunity to finally sit up and contemplate your next moves.

'Should I just run away?' You thought, thinking about the pain of rejection. You'd deal with it. Somehow. 'It's the coward's way out. But what more can I do?'

"If you're thinking of running away, don't," Dazai suddenly said, meeting your eyes with a stare so intense that you swore he could read every single thought in your mind.

"That was not what I was thinking," You clearly lied, crossing your arms.

"You know, I can tell that you're lying, my Belladonna," Dazai put his hand on your cheek, his slender fingers brushing away the stray strands of hair on your face. "You are not a very good liar."

"D — wh-what?" You froze up completely. Because as much as you would like to deny, even an action like this left you wanting more. His hands were inexplicably warm and strangely soft. You couldn't even think about running away now. Dazai put his other hand behind your back, pulling you close to him. Close enough that your noses were almost touching and you could see the little flecks of amber in his pretty brown eyes.

"D-do you also h-have feelings f-for me?"

What the hell was wrong with your voice? You wanted to ask your question again, but your words died in your throat.

Instead, your heart chose to speak. You tilted your head slightly, barely brushing your lips against his. Even this small action sent volts of electricity coursing through your body. But then, your courage fizzled out and you tried to move back.

Key word; tried.

Dazai put his hand at the back of your head and pulled you closer, finally, freaking finally, kissing you.

You wished you could describe what you were feeling, but you really couldn't. Your mind was completely shut down and all you could really think was, that you were floating. And since it was your one of the few kisses you had in your life, you didn't know what to do. So you kept on pressing your mouth against Dazai's, trying to have more; trying to feel more of him.

It was strange, it felt so strange. But kissing Dazai felt incredibly…amazing. Yeah, amazing. Just him and you and nothing else. You felt like you could touch the stars now and you didn't want it to end. You wanted to keep on doing this forever, or as long as both of you could.

But then, Dazai suddenly ended the kiss, pulling back with a lazy grin.

You stared at him, breathing heavily. And then, you let your head fall onto his shoulder, grabbing onto to the front of his cream-colored trench coat.

"Does that answer your question, (Y/N)-chan?" He asked with a sing-song voice, suddenly hugging you.

"So you do like me?" Your voice was muffled by his coat, but you knew he heard you clearly.

His lips were pressed onto your neck, moving with his answer. You understood it immediately. Releasing his coat from your hands, you hugged him back.

You knew this moment wouldn't last very long, but you would revel in it for now.

It was going to be the only thing on your mind for a very long time.

a/n: i hope this was a fun read! with this quarantine, i've been thinking of attempting to write more character x readers because they are good practice for writing a multi-chapter fic. so you might see more bsd, haikyuu and bnha content on here. I might also post about DC so let's see.

My wattpad

#dazai osamu #dazai osamu x reader #bsd #bungo stray dogs #osamu dazai #osamu dazai x reader #bsd oneshot #fluff #bungou stray dogs oneshots #bsd imagines #dazai #x reader #character x reader

29 notes · View notes

satanschild01 · 4 years

Text

No All Might? That’s Alright Prt3

Izuku Midoriya Fanfiction

A/N: In all honesty this took me way too long just to finish writing this chapter, but I pushed through so I guess it’s fine. I’ve created a AO3 account recently and I’ve posted all of my previous fanfictions there so if you want to check me out, you can find me as SatansChild

Hope you all stay safe and wear a mask if you can't physically distance.Hope to update soon!

Catch you on the flip side ~ Em

Photo used in this fic was referenced from original picture from anime, I did draw this photo jtlyk

Tags:

@random-fandom-girl-24

Tags for some wonderful feedback😘: @trashys-things @pink-imagines @marvelmymarvel @shikigami-the-paper-spirit @spaced-out-imagines @marvelmymarvelmain @writingfreakk

Trigger warning: Talk about death

Word Count: 2633

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

After making sure all of the blood was no longer on his uniform, Closing his eyes, Izuku steeled himself to walk into the All Might shrine that was his room. Sure, he still wanted to be a hero, and he admired All Might’s strength, but he couldn’t stand to be surrounded by posters and figurines of a man who couldn’t offer any sort of encouragement to a child who clearly needed it. Izuku pulled some cardboard boxes out from his closet and started filling them with everything All Might. Oboro didn’t make a sound during the time he cleaned out his room, which he was grateful for. Even though he could just feel Oboro wanting to ask questions.

“So what are you going to do about all this stuff?” Oboro asked as Izuku changed his All Might sheets with regular black ones “You seem like such a big fan...it just seems like a waste just to keep it all in boxes.”

Izuku shrugged his shoulders.”I’m not much of a fan anymore.” he lied to mostly himself rather than to Oboro, “I guess I’ll just donate the stuff later.” Once his walls were finally bare, Izuku stuffed the now full boxes to the back of his closet and flopped onto his bed. The room stayed silent for a moment until Izuku broke the ice, “I don’t want to intrude on your personal life…but can you tell me about yourself?” he asked

“Well for the fact that I witnessed and helped you with some pretty deep stuff, it sorta would be rude if I didn’t tell you something about my previous life,” Oboro said cheekily

“H-how long have you been...you know…” Izuku paused not really wanting to complete the question.

“...dead?” Izuku nodded “I was in my second year of high school when I died and I would be 29 by now so...close to 12 years I think?” Izuku sat there on his bed frozen

‘12 years is a long time to be a ghost or spirit to not have passed on, that is if people actually pass onto another place once they die’ Izuku thought to himself

“I was patrolling around Tasomiya Ward with one of my best friends when there was a villain attack...I was working on saving some kids when debris fell on top of me...when I woke up I was like how I am now, I couldn’t find my body anywhere so I just...travelled around…” Oboro seemed to quiet down at mentioning that he never found his body to move onto another life, so Izuku thought of ways to change the current mood of the room.

“So you were a hero in training or something?” he asked, face full of wonder, Oboro hummed in affirmation “What school did you go to?”

“I went to U.A”

“Wait really?!” Izuku exclaimed excitedly, “that's so cool!”

They continued talking and asking questions back and forth, before falling into a comfortable silence. A few minutes past before Izuku took a deep breath

“I...I’m sorry,” Izuku said quietly, slowly curling into himself

"Why would you be sorry kid?" Oboro’s voice was full of confusion. But Izuku only curled in on himself further.

"If it wasn't for me you wouldn't be stuck here." As if anyone wanted to be bound to some stupid Deku...like him. And here he thought it was a whole coincidence that Oboro was with him. But instead, he just took whatever type of freedom he had to begin with.

"Hey, no! Stop that. Izuku that's not true! I'm here because I want to be!" The warmth spread all over him and he couldn't help but lean into it. “I said I'd make a hero out of you and I still plan on it."

Izuku looked up only to see the ceiling of his room, lifting his arm up to the sky and let it just float there (like what every kid does while laying on there bed contemplating on what to do next). "I wish I could see you again."

Oboro hummed. Seeming to think something through. "I don’t think there’s much out there since I was only a second-year when I died, but there could be some photos of me with friends or an article"

Izuku seemed to take that as a challenge as he went to his computer. "What did you choose to be your hero name?"

"Loud Cloud."

After scouring the web for a couple of minutes nothing showed up except for an old article from the Nikkei Shimbun newspaper, reporting the death of hero-in-training Loud Cloud. Izuku quickly exited that site choosing to search for something different. “What’s your full name Oboro?”

“Oh that’s right I didn’t tell you my full name, it is Oboro Shirakumo” Oboro replied

“Oboroshirikumo...oboroshirikumooo….here!” Izuku exclaimed pointing at the monitor’s screen. “This photo was tagged saying ‘Curry eating competition at U.A’s School Festival. Winner Hizashi Yamada from class 2-A!’ it also says the names of the people in the photo are; Shota Aizawa, Hizashi Yamada, and Oboro Shirakumo.”

“Oh, I remember that!” Oboro cried out laughing “The curry was soo spicy I was freaking out because I couldn’t find anything to soothe my burning throat!”

“So that’s you in the back then?” Izuku asked pointing towards a teenager who seems to be freaking out.

Oboro chuckles “Yep, the other two were my best friends!”

“Yamada looks sorta familiar what’s his hero name?” Izukku asked, curious on why the 16-year-old looked so familiar to him

“Unless he changed it before becoming a pro, which he probably would not, his hero name is Present Mic.”

Izuku sputtered “W-wait you were close friends with THE Present Mic?!” Oboro hummed in agreement while Izuku had his miny freak out “

“Oh my god that is socool!Ilistentohisradioshoweveryday,andhe’ssuchanamazinghero,likeevenifheisdeafduetohisquirkhedoesn’tletitbotherhiman-” He stopped hearing the sound of laughter coming around his room and his lamp flickering

"Aw jeez, that’s amazing Hizashi got to get that radio show he wanted." There was a quick blast of warmth flooding around his back and chest resembling a hug. "Well anyway, you should probably head to bed. You have a busy day ahead of you tomorrow and a long way to go before you can have a chance at being accepted into UA!"

"What are you going to do while I sleep?" Izuku asked, eyes slowly drooping.

"I'm going to see how far I can go without being next to you, and have a look around and exploring a bit. No need to worry. I'll make sure to be careful and be here in the morning." He seemed to pick up on his anxieties. Izuku felt warmth as Oboro slowly pet his hair back. "Goodnight, Izuku."

The next morning Izuku woke up to warmth pulsing on his right cheek. "Hey kid it’s time to get up! You have training to do! Up and at ‘em!" Oboro’s voice was overly joyful and Izuku felt very unwilling to get out of bed.

"Mm...just a bit longeeeer." He groaned turning himself over facing away from where he guesses Oboro is standing (floating?).

"Fair warning Izuku my jokes are terrible, everyone at school would always runaway once I started and I haven’t been able to talk to actual people in so long! If spaghetti were to have it’s own action movie, what would it be called?.... Mission im-pasta-ble. What did the pot eat on it’s birthday?....pancakes. What do you call a camel in a drought?....A dry hu- "

Finally, Izuku jerked up, covering his ears. “Okay. Okay, I’m up! No need to finish that.” His face started to burn a light pink across his face, (knowing what the end of the joke was) as he started to kick the blankets off only to turn towards the window and see barely any light outside. "Wha- Oboro!! The sun isn’t even out yet!"

He turned glaring into thin air hoping to make contact with him.

"Yes, it is, Izu. It's just reeeally early in the morning. There is plenty of time for you to get ready and eat before we go out for a morning run!" He was being weirdly energetic about the whole ordeal, but Izuku knew he wouldn't take no for an answer.

Heading to the bathroom, Izuku ran a brush through his wild curly hair and brushed his teeth. Going back to his room, Obroro pipped up. "It's a bit cool outside so I suggest you wear some long sleeves."

The entire way to his closet Izuku muttered incoherent things. In the end, he opted to wear a plain black shorts and a long-sleeved shirt with written kanji saying 'tank-top' with his old dusty sneakers because his red sneakers were still on top of the roof.

Before heading out Izuku ate some toast and an orange. If he got hungry later on their run he could always eat more when they got back. As Izulu started to leave the apartment Izuku tripped over an unmarked box that was just left in front of the door.

"Ooo I wonder what it is!” Oboro seemed quite enthusiastic as Izuku went to open the box revealing his faded red shoes and yellow backpack.

"Wai-how-who found my stuff?" Izuku asked immediately putting the bag by the door and quickly changing between uncomfortable and comfortable shoes.

"I don’t know, when I got back from wandering around the package was just...there."

"Maybe someone found it and found out where I live from my contact info and address was written inside…?” Izuku wondered out loud.

“I guess so,” Oboro said looking to the bright sight of things.

‘But what if it was...All Might. Yeah, I’m glad that I don’t have to go back up there to collect my things but...I don’t want to have to depend on All Might to help me with my own problems.’

“Hey don’t think like that Izu! I know you’re not a huge fan of the guy, but you don’t have to beat yourself down like that. I know you’re better than that” Oboro spoke sternly trying to make a point, but that soon backfired as warmth spread through his body.

“Hold up- could you always hear my thoughts?” Izuku questioned as he started to jog away from the apartment.

“So far I can heat some things. Like your thoughts that way heavily on you emotionally. But it could possibly work to talk to me through your mind. So you don’t look like a freak talking to themselves.” Oboro quickly informs Izuku as to not worry him.

Sighed Izuku. That was true. Though he kept thinking about it as he jogged. As they passed Dagobah Municipal Beach, the sun had started to rise. Taking in a deep breath was the wrong reason as Izuku cringed from the awful smell of garbage. Despite the smell, Izuku took a break, taking a seat at the entrance.

"Oh gross. What is this place?" Oboro asked with a clear sound of disgust in his voice.

"Well," Izuku started."This is Dagobah Municipal Beach Park. It has accumulated trash coming from the sea for years, turning it from a beautiful beach spot into a trash heap for everyone's unwanted or broken belongings." It was really a shame. As a kid, Izuku recalled going to the beach. Lie under a beach umbrella, making sandcastles. But by the time he was tall enough into the water, it was already flooded with trash by then.

"That's terrible." Oboro seemed deeply upset about this actually. It made Izuku want to do something about it. But before Izuku could voice his thoughts Oboro spoke up.

“Hey Izu, could we make a quick visit to a convenience store?”

“Sure...what exactly do you want me to get?” Izuku asked, despite having an idea what Oboro was thinking.

“Well...you’re going to need to get some garbage bags and some gloves.”

Izuku then dashed towards the nearest convenience store with determination in his eyes. A frail-looking lady turned the key to open the doors as he walked by. Causing her to recoil in slight shock, Izuku realized that with his rapid approach he had frightened her. "I'm sorry, ma'am. I'd just come to purchase some garbage bags and some gloves.

The older woman seemed to soften something about his face as she smiled and opened his door. "Sure thing, they’re both in the last aisle on your right."

Before she went inside, Izuku thanked her and smiled back. He quickly found what he was looking for and brought a box of trash bags and a pair of workers gloves onto the counter.

"What's the hurry, son? Why do you need trash bags this early in the morning? You aren't trying to cause trouble are you?" the old woman pointed to Izuku with an accusing finger, and he shook his head quickly.

"Oh no, ma'am! I thought that I could just try and clean the beach up! I passed it while I was on my morning run!" Izuku assured, voicing Oboro’s plan

At this, the elder woman gently smiles while scanning the items. “Wow, is that right?” she said astonished, “ You know how long that place has been a mess? What makes you believe you can do it all by yourself?"

Her words weren't really painful, she was just being realistic. He knew she was right. He certainly had no obligation to clean up the beach. He could have just ignored it and easily went about his day. But he knew if he wanted to be a hero then he would need to start off the roots of how heroes came to be. How they used to work. Heroes in the beginning didn’t do what they did for fame. No. They didn’t care for the recognition they would get. They did it because they just wanted to help.

“That’s the thing, ma’am. I thought that it wouldn’t hurt to try. It’s also a great way to work out, instead of having to buy workout equipment or get a gym membership!” Izuku brightly smiles towards the lady as he handed her the money to buy his items.

“Well, I wish you luck, kid. I’m guessing that you’ll need a place to put the trash you collect.” She stated, Izuku smiling sheepishly at her rubbing the back of his head she continued, “There are two dumpsters in the alley behind the store, they get taken every Monday.”

"Thank you, ma'am!" Izuku said genuinely as he headed for the door. He didn't think too much about how he would dispose of the garbage, so it was good to have one offered.

Oboro began to laugh as Izuku jogged back towards the beach. "Cheaper than having to buy workout equipment or get a gym membership! Man, how true that is nowadays!”

The first garbage bags were packed very quickly. broken bottles, cans of beer, old and rotting newspaper, all of it was poured into the trash bag. Plastic, paper, glass, etc. Izuku could take them to a recycling center! He was already pumped about this new project when Oboro spoke up.

“Hey, Izu, before you toss that into the bag” placing his hand on Izuku’s making him feel warmth blossom closest to the soda, can packaging he was holding in that hand. “make sure you cut each circle so if they end up in wildlife again then animals won’t get their heads stuck inside.”

Izuku's eyes lit up as he started to tear apart each loop before placing it in one of the bags used for recycling. Soon Izuku had used up a quarter of the box of trash bags gone and only had 6x5 feet rectangle cleared of the beach.

3 notes · View notes

gencat21 · 5 years

Text

Unexpected • Lee Taeyong (1)

(I did not give the boyfriend a name, not worth it haha.)

Autumn is just beautiful, watching the trees turn orange and how the floor was often full of their leaves was the most pretty and annoying thing for you. You love the cold breeze hitting your face, love the taste of coffee on your tongue, and love walking peacefully with your boyfriend talking about how your day has gone before going to the next class in half an hour. "I may be getting a good job as a music teacher. My piano teacher has been recommending me to a lot of people and after winning that competition last summer I've been getting a lot of emails. Also, a company contacted me, and they are interested in the songs I've written." You explain with enthusiasm, while he observed you with that smile of his.

"My little future Beethoven. Everybody wants you. But not as much as I do." He gets closer to kiss your forehead sweetly, but your thoughts are somewhere else, keeping you to react to his sweetness.

"There's even an offer abroad. Can you believe that?"

His smile turn softly to a straight line while he looks at you in disbelief. He wanted to smile for you, but he can't fake a smile. "Are you really considering that one?"

"It's on the states, but it's the best offer I've ever gotten."

"You really are, wow." He steps backward and laughs ironically. "I mean so little to you that you take that decision without even consulting it with me?" And your mouth fells open at how mad he was getting by the second. You were expecting to see him happy for you, after all it was an offer that you couldn't turn down.

"You don't have to get mad about this," you say sweetly so he would calm down, but he was looking somewhere else with a frown, which was starting to make you mad as well. "I have time to think about until graduation but I won't be turning that one down just because you want me to."

"How can you be so selfish?" And with that your sweet side disappear in the thin air. He was really saying that to you as if he wasn't thinking about his own words and you think it's useless to talk to him right now because he was getting madder.

"I have classes right now."

"Your class starts in 25 minutes."

"Well, I left a piano in the dance room, and the teacher needs it." That's wasn't a lie. So you take your leave trying to brush your boyfriend off your mind, but you were still thinking about the conversation you just had. "Calling me selfish when he was being selfish too, who does he even think he is? He's not my father, is the freaking crazy." You ramble while walking obviously mad to the practice room hating the fact that you left it there this morning. Why did you agree to play piano on the ballet presentation one week away? Yes, it was going to make everything more beautiful, but now you had more things to do.

You find Ten on the way and stop ranting to approach him without saying anything. You hold his wrist and continue walking, deciding by yourself that he was going to help you to move the keyboard from one side of campus to the other. "Why are you so mad today? Are you going to kill me?" He asks with that smile you loved and hated, he smiles way too much. A beautiful smile like that should be totally illegal.

"I hate men,"

"Are you becoming lesbian now?"

"No, women judge way too much. I hate them as well." You end up saying and laugh because of the conversation.

"Where are you taking me? Our class is the other way."

"Just help me move the keyboard, I will pay you back with fruit."

"But I hate fruits,"

"I know,"

"If you give me fruits I will throw it at you. But I'll accept tea." You like him as a friend. You've always wondered why you both weren't actually closer since he was a sweet and nice person to be around. But you had two different lives, so you just were glad that you both had a lot of classes in common, and that was enough for you. He made classes shorter by sitting with you, and you were thankful. Shortly, you both arrive at the building, and from that distance, you could hear the loud music playing in the dance room. The closer you got, the louder it was. The door was partially open, so you carefully approach the door to spy on whoever was dancing inside.

Inside the dance, room was a guy moving his body to the rhythm of the music. You never had the talent to dance that upbeat kind of music, leaving classical music as your cup of tea, but doesn't change the fact that you wish you could dance the way he can. Ten behind you peeks for a second as well and then taps your shoulder to get your attention. "Y/n, we need to go." Reminding you that your walk back was not short. Sadness covers your eyes since you wanted to see the end of the choreography, even if it was only the guy's back you were seeing. but you know he's right. Your eyes travel to Ten, who just shrugs at you. Suddenly the music stops.

His familiar face was turned to your direction, glancing at you with nothing more than a frown. "Who gave you the right to spy me?" His voice sends shivers down your spine because of how pissed he was of being spied.

"I wasn't," you step inside and your index finger points to your piano in a corner, his eyes follow your finger and then he looks again at you.

"Take it quick and leave, you're wasting my time." You avoid his gaze since it was a little intimidating sometimes. You've been used to seeing that guy for... As long as you can remember. For some strange reason, your paths are the same. Same high school, and weirdly, same art school. But you've never heard his voice until now, you've never had the chance to have a conversation, and you never wanted to. He's always had the bad boy aura, and you wanted nothing to do with it. He's always been the pretty bad boy that you made sure not to cross paths with, even though it was impossible

You know he never noticed you before, and hat even when he was a bad boy you had nothing to worry about because your social life was completely different. Until now that his scary gaze was following you around the room, watching your every move and that makes you uneasy. For a reason, they named him the scary pretty guy back on your school days. "Are you going to be here all day?" Ten asks Taeyong casually, you forgot they were friends for a moment there, but it was luck to you, since for that reason he stopped looking at you.

"Almost, we'll be waiting for you. Jaehyun and Johnny are on their way here right now, Mark went out a couple minutes ago."

"I have piano classes right now and then I will be free," he picks up your keyboard while you silently take the stand and make your way out of the room, glad that Ten distracted Taeyong. "See you in two hours." You hear him say, followed by him leaving the room behind you. You felt you could finally breathe, surprised that as soon as he stare at you, your breathing stop. He was breathtakingly handsome, but that was not the reason why you felt like that. Was the bad boy aura he has. "He just hates people seeing his choreographies when is not finished." Ten explain to you due to the silence that you hold.

"I don't care," you don't.

•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•

8:23 pm says your phone when a text message pops up. You gasp in shock, realizing that you had been there longer than expected. It was normal for you to lose track of time when you were composing, but this time the hours really went by quicker than expected. You parted ways with Ten at five when your class ended, by staying in the piano classroom and played until the message from your boyfriend brought you back to reality. You slowly pick up your stuff, throwing your phone inside your bag not wanting to even read his text. But as soon as you step out of the building, your phone starts to vibrate, letting you know you had a call.

Annoyed, you look for your phone on your bag to see him calling you. "Yes?"

"I'm in the parking lot, let me take you home." His normal sweet voice appears on the other side, you roll your eyes in response as if he could see you. You just stayed silent on the entrance looking at your feet. "Or at least let's talk. I can't stand the fact of falling asleep while being mad at each other." Not standing the silence anymore. "Please."

"Sure, see you in a bit." The walk to the parking lot was the shortest walk you've ever had on the campus, you did not want to talk about anything right now because you were starting to see the real him. The not very supportive one, the one that may hold you back on a future. That may be the real one, and you were not ready to actually meet him. But you have to. His figure is against his car in the parking lot where there were only two cars, his and another way a few lots to the right. His eyes were on you the whole walk to his car, and you dont know what to feel about it. "Look, I thought about it,"

"Are you staying?"

" I—” you stop talking realizing you were about to raise your voice after that, and take a deep breath. "I will not make that decision right now, but I want you to be on my side and understand me instead of being against me. This is my future we're talking about in here.” you express your feeling, glad that he was listening to you in silence. " Do you understand?"

"But you can have a nice future, what is the matter with staying here?" He does not understand

"I do not know what I will do," you argue. "I just want you to be on my side not matter what decision I make."

"You will stay here with me." He says, as it was so easy, but the way he says it just bothered you. The demanding tone gets on your nerves.

"Stop saying it like that, you don't get to choose what I will do. This is my life."

"Oh, I see. You want to break up with me and fuck every single dude you see, like you went to fuck that guy instead of actually going to class?"

"What are you ta—"

"You thought I didn't see you leaving me alone to go for a guy? And you were still here when is not usual for you to be here? I went to your apartment and your roommate told me you were here. What were you doing?" Your expression shifts to one of disbelief and hurt.

"I can't believe you think I would do something like that to you," saying it was harder than thinking about it. A single tear rolls down your cheek, one that you quickly swipe away. "If you think like that, we have to break up. I'm leaving, and do not fucking call me ever again." You spit, then turn around to walk away containing the tears from falling. You do not want to cry near than man to show how weak you were. Obviously, you are weaker than he is.

You just feel the pain on your wrist and how harshly you are turned around to face him, "That hurts!" You whine, not being able to avoid the look he has. You've never seen his so mad, before, even less looking at you. The feeling of not being able to do anything was frustrating as he held your other wrist too. "Let me go, what are you doing?"

"So I'm right? How many guys have you fucked?"

"Let me fucking go!"

"You forgot you were only mine?"

"Fuck you!" You do not know where the strength to say to that man that had you under his control came out from, neither how by instinct your knee fly between his legs and make him let you go without wanting. Your breathing is audible, and you tell yourself to run away but you could not move at all. In shock, you stare at how he falls on the floor and stays there for a minute. Why could you not move? Why you have to stay there when you could run away and disappear somewhere he could not find you? Why do you wait until he stands up again and without thinking slaps your face so hard you fall on the floor? By then, Isn't it too late? Where did the strong Y/n escape to? He walks again to you, so you look for something around you that you could hit him with, but there's nothing. You close your eyes hard, waiting for whatever he is going to do to you, until the sound of a strong punch makes an appearance, and then you see from the corner of your eye how the man ready to hit you is on the floor holding his face with closed eyes. "Taeyong?" You ask yourself, seeing the familiar clothes you saw in the practice room earlier on the day.

You thought you had seen the scariest look on him, but that was not true. Now you could see what he really looks like when he is mad. Meanwhile, he's punching your now ex-boyfriend like his life depended on it. It was not the fact that he was hitting the man you can't say you don't love anymore, but the fact that you hated violence. Throwing punches in a reckless way like a person body was the easiest thing to hurt. "S—stop!" You voice comes out, but you know there was no way that with the sound of punches he heard you. You crawl to where they are and grab Taeyong's hand so he would stop.

He does and stands up so quickly that you barely could see him running to his car, grabbing something and coming out again. Your ex stands up, and follows him until you see him stop abruptly. That clicking sound just sends panic all over your body. "Do not fucking touch her ever again."

"Man, put that down," he says, giving a few steps backward.

"Taeyong, stop that!"

"I will make sure you don't fucking touch her from now on, if you look at her, if you get near her, even if you fucking think of her I will make sure is the last time you ever do." He spits the words out with some much hatred in his voice that you even lost yours. Your mouth moves like it screaming but you can't hear yourself.

From there, you start seeing how everything goes down on slow motion. How you lose sight of what was going on for a second while Ten sees your state and hugs you. Your tears rolling down in desperation wanting everything to just stop. You see how Jaehyun, Johnny, and Mark appear in the scene trying to calm Taeyong, while your ex gets in his car and leaves without even looking at you once. Mark slowly takes the gun, that God knows why he has it on his car, while Johnny holds Taeyong and says things you can't hear nor see, you just glare over Ten's shoulder and let all the tears come out. Your arms hug him when you see that nothing bad really happened besides the bastard having a black eye and bruises on his face. "It's alright," your sense of hearing lets you hear Ten murmuring it to you while your big sobs become little.

Your eyes go to the man that stares at your crying self on the floor. That anger and hatred disappeared out of the blue, now there was an expression that you could not recognize as he took a few slow steps. Your hands softly push Ten away from you, and as a mechanism of defense you back away. "Do not touch me!" You demand at the man that wanted to get near you and check if you were fine. Taeyong just wanted to ignore your words and get near, but your tears and your shaking hand made him stand still.

"I can explain,"

"Y—you don't need to explain anything to me, I don't want to know," you stand up with a great amount of effort since your legs were shaking the same way your whole body was. You forget about your bag, you just wanted to lock yourself on your apartment and forget it all happened. As if it was possible. You knew all the boys you've crossed paths a few times before where looking at your weak figure trying to walk away, and it was the most heartbreaking thing they have seen. Taeyong notices your bag on the floor, but before he could pick it up Ten does. "You've done enough, I will give it to her and take her home."

Mark gets closer to him before the others and places a hand on his shoulder when your figure besides Ten's disappears from their sight. "Let's go,"

Taeyong takes his hand off of his shoulder softly. "Please don't touch me," calmly says before starting to walk to his car.

(Any mistakes I didn't see, please let me know so I can change it. Thank you!)

60 notes · View notes

myheartbeatskids · 5 years

Text

So Declan loved me and we talked about science and lab babies and clones and all that. So He told me he loved me because i was the first person to really really listen and understand as opposed to being the one to teach.

And so he had understood what he was taught then developed and built upon it correctly with help from his own brain and God. And del Muerte whom helped me understand as well cause that shit was mind blowing.

So he asked me to have his soul mate. To give birth to her.

And I was pretty much dragged out and Declan ran the show after that.

I agreed but it was more like a thing where i had to focus and talk instead of fainting.

So Matt actually helped to implant because I have an upturned uterious and so things like that are painful because of the rigidity and non flexible as i need materials used while Jeremiah comforted and helped me relax.

So then essentially i was kidnapped.

Declan is part clone and part Neanderthal.

Annabelle is part clone and part Neanderthal.

So some of us from Michael Jackson's boarding school --- although I wasn't i stayed there alot on my own. So i was part of it, unofficially as i am a civilian doing military shit now. --- have clones in a laboratory. But they are miniature human size as they are kept in barbie size containers.

Since Declan was a clone Jesse gave permission to make, they said i should use a clone.

It took 5 eggs until Declan approved the child that would be created in the embryo. Del Muerte communicated to us what God said.

Most males get their soul mates at age 7. Declan was only 2 years old. So God hadnt had enough experience to program or create his perfect soulmate.

So it just so happened it was 2 years of plus 5 embryos which makes the year 7 while added together.

So when Annabelle was born Declan came to get me and her but my now ex-husband got me all fucked up and i had amnesia and all that and i remember the power struggle type issues while signing the birth certificate which is why i get child support as my ex swore bla bla bla and signed papers to those statements but I was all "Dude while he's signing let's run!" Because he pissed me off during that time and i was all no hes wrong and all... But I guess I was scared of him or his aura csused me confusion or Idk. I remember feeling sick.

So craziness. We are 16 years late. And unfortunately yet fortunately a lot of research was done and i have a lot of government apology money coming my way. Which i don't have yet.... But soon.

This is Cambria AvaLynn named after Alexis Dejoria.

Because Matt's parents were into hiding, they named him after a mat. A common object so in case of ESP feom the people they hid from they would think "welcome mat" like welcome to travel with us son named Matt. Welcome to eat at the dining table, Matt. Well, come, Matt.

So came or come because i would always want to see Matt so I would say "You came!!!" When i saw him and hug him and he would say "welcome"

And Bria after me.

Turning the x into a v (for Victory) and Lynn as in the 80s most of my friends on the military base i lived on has Lynn as their middle names. So to remind me she is a friend.

She's my child that was ectopic due to the sponges Jamie & Doug Otis found and reminded us of. But we went to the hospital because i began to hemmoragge and they were able to save her and her twin.

Then my mom killed her and he died naturally as he was in ICU TO experiment on them being raised/healed as premies temporarily as one within an incubator and the other skin to skin contact. As woman need to be comforted more, we picked Ava to bring home.

They were the first experiment with soul mates being born as twins. Both clones of my and Jeremiah and his being Ava and my being the male Andrew.

Andrew after Jesse... "And he drew" cause he was always drawing beautifully.

And the other clones were of Jesse James and Alexis.

Alexis got kidnapped by her dad and so the story goes... I did too Eventually

Jeremiah's dad helped us as the grandparent in house.

This is Declan.

He told Jeremiah "I'm not the one sitting around waiting with a pouted lip waiting for someone to do it for me. Now i found the woman and go get my kid!!"

Dude WTF I'm not having someones kid... I'm only 21!!

"Now im the man around the house and what I say goes!!! And you are going to have my kid!!"

Dude whatever. So i did dream into the lab with them but... I thought we were just playing and so i agreed and so next thing i knew there was a frozen child ready to be implanted. Thus my ability to be kidnapped so easily...

Cause when a kid is all telling you about clones and labs and shit... And you're hearing voices... that shit is insane. Literally.

So i didn't take it seriously enough.

But Declan is only 19 Now. And my kid is 16.

So it's old enough to have a romantic relationship. To avoid issues i had as a child with social services.

The plan was to have them grow up as friends but also believed it may been too dangerous....

Yet I still don't agree that it was.

However for the last 10 year's I have been working daily for my amnesia to be solved and also saving the world (of NHRA especially) at the same time.

And have earned multiple Nobel Peace Prizes which i have yet to receive.

So working on law enforcement and the military and government, about to break into the public school system and tear that up ;) as a civilian has earned me billions of dollars i have yet to receive....

But i have given away as i can and have bought businesses that I want.

As proof that the government does care about all its people's hopes and dreams they have bought them on my behalf and am gsining bank! And i shop st my own businesses too... Ironically! I been shopping at Loves for nearly a year... went into Speedway a few times now i drive an extra 5 miles just to shop there because i like it more!!

Robert, the shift manager finally told me tonight as I bought all the GIANTS for my Giant 6'7" man. And i turned the ones in Valencia County to Speedway in honor of Aaron and Paul (twins) who wanted to show the dangers of meth and the meth community as they honored me with my idea of how to end Breaking Bad with the movie reel of El Camino (the mother road) of the manner of the psychological reality of life gone wrong.

I freak Robert out... He was worried when he saw me there that I was to audit like a monster, fire everyone and work the cash register and store myself.

So tonight he saw I bought milkshakes (not available at Love's) figured it out and gave me a pack of smokes for free and blurted out why.

So i took all the giants as i always do and fucked them all up and made them better.

So i own them till i make my money back on the businesses and then they get given to who I intended it for... As I do double check they will always be worthy... If not i keep them for me because I was being good snd honest and fair the whole time.

So 360° K i own.

So i only compete with Love's whom I always promised the King's Highway to... You know him... As an old time Western Thug bitch ass womanizer player. Motorcycle Guru. Hot Rod extraordinaire. Texas loving son of a gun. Jesse James Smith! Just kidding... Just regular old ole fogie mad scientist Jesse Gregory Smith. Of West Coast Choppers. Which i own and always have as i put up the money for his business intending to always be in his life and helping him. So my apology... The only one i can ever give as i can't predict the future without help is Love. And he loves everyone and won't let Google tell.

I bought every gas station in the country as we will be switching to electric and hydro electric and non fuel and solar and hybrid autos by 2030. So the previous owners have a nice retirement and no stress. As the storage oil facilities that were shot in Saudia Arabia were actually empty. I own them.

Fossil fuels are actually the blood of dinosaurs and other dead bodies that are converted and broken down and dehydrated by plant life...

I found that out by the eternal bushes burning.. I mean growing... here on the mountain. Tumble weeds otherwise known as thyme. And we found via satellite tons of skeletons by Earth xrays under the bushes and some not as they are closer to the Earth surface. I found a wooly mammoth knuckle bone.

We moved here in 2002 and there was a patch of earth that looked like concrete by the mail boxes and we just drove over them assuming that's what it was.

They were mummified wooly mammoths. Now broken up and scattered all over the desert road.

I would not like my blood which could potentially bring me back to life wasted on a car... For someone to get to a job they hate. So no more. Not from the USA anyways.

One night I was at dinner and i said Obama needs to handle thwt South Dakota pipeline. My dad was all what is he supposed to do? All simple solutions were crap and had an argument. I said "then lie! Tell the American people they are scum! Tell them we opened the pipeline up and the pipes broke and destroyed the precious land that needs to be protected." My dad laughed and i felt kinda stupid for being so angry.

But Uncle Donald heard my point and so thats exactly what he did. Fake news? Its real.

Because he saw the change I made in the NHRA with some lies that laid very close to the truth.

You don't need to believe in reincarnation for it to happen. I didn't until about 6 months ago. But my mom's mom and my great aunt my grandma's sister ... Granny Bessie Heltons 2 daughters did. My grandma explained it to me one night when I was 18 as i had asked my Great Aunt Nita i was closer to but she didn't explain she just said "because i do" And the dictionary explaination i already knew. But my grandma traveled with me like y'all know i do And showed me.

We started in Heaven with only having one human life and having the soul figure of a human that we select. Hers was a teenage body, absolutely beautiful. With her old ass mind and experience. I told her what I wanted was to be a child. A dirty raggedy haired barefoot blonde without a care in the world, feeling smarter than I feel now... Because that is when i was happiest. When i saw i could end pain and suffering with death, when i knew life could escape heart ache, even when evil exist.

And so now on her second cat life with me, as her first caused her kidnapping by the same drug induced psycho piece of shit that arrested and molested Jesse James dog, Coco and her untimely death as I did record in Tumblr. "Sister Kitty" was kidnapped by him, hes in a special jail. He just had his pinkie finger nail and big toe nail removed as he did kidnap Mogar and slice his face and slice Kizzys leg. So in order to understand what he did he agreed to similar punishment as he did to our precious cargo...

Cargo my bitches!

Jesse: No! I only ask!

Me: who do i have to convince?

Jesse: Idk Jeremiah?

Me: Ava who is your dad?

Ava: Idk I guess not Jeremiah?? IDK!! HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO TELL!? you all always told me they are both my dad's. Let me ask God. Oh! Jesse! ..... And Jeremiah

Me: your dad is your dad and dad he will always be no matter shine or high water, love will always be there for you and for me. Alexis, do you know that one?

She nods all teary..

Jesse: well did i get loves?!

Me: uhh yes ass hole! We always love you back. What do you want with a gas station with no gas? That's like having a family with out us, most especially me!

Jesse: well it got gas now!!!

Me: well gas up at your local, bring a truck. I got a lot of stuff.

Declan: you hear her? Most especially me! Me! Well, me too, you better pick me up.

Me: Jesse... You ready for Orlando?? I got a Chase bank account with the Princess Castle on the debit card... Just needs a little cash in the account.

Jesse: You Mean You Will Pay!!!

Me: i see that was not a question so that does not deserve a response. But yes. I am suppose to have a wire transfer per last night's discussions that will pay for it.

Jesse: WHOA SHIT!

Me: Jeremiah you down?

Jeremiah: to pay Miss Giant Owner?

Me: uhh I'm Miss Speedyway now. No.. Carry me through times square after some Disney World Fun!

Jeremiah: FUCK YES!! uhh yes thank you for inviting me. I will go

Matt Hagan: look look at this. Im the best friend i even got her kid named after me

Me: Matt Hagan... Looks like you're invited, The Best Friend. In or out of Disney World for the hotel.

Matt: IN!!

Me: youre definitely going you know how to do it right! Pops... You gonna stay home alone with your woman?

Pops: not if i don't have to

M3: you don't

Pops: shit! Oh yeah!

Chuck: what about Cookie!!

Me: you and bring Your comrades I need to talk to

Chuckie: oh Cookies going!

Me: I didn't know he could do the Conga.

Jesse: yes you did!

Me: no wonder it looked familiar.

17 notes · View notes

dekudynamight · 5 years

Text

Title: Worth Waiting For part 6

Rating: E

Pairing: Sebastian Stan x Jon Kortajarena, Sebastian Stan x Chris Evans

Word Count: 2.7k

Summary: Sebastian makes his confession to Jon, and it doesn't go as expected.

A/N: Aaaahhhhh thank you guys so much for the amazing response to this fic thus far! You're all amazing and I love all of you and I hope you like this 😃I'm excited for the next chapter after this one and have it started already so stay tuned! 💙

For the next three days, Sebastian went through the motions of life under the weight of his crushing guilt, and he kept it all to himself. He talked to Jon daily as usual and did his best to hide it, doing a damn good job and blaming what little Jon did notice on being tired. He wasn't a great liar but all he was trying to do was hide it until he could confess in person. There was no way he was going to just move on with life like his kiss with Chris had never happened - it would eat him up inside until he couldn't take it anymore.

So he sucked it up and carried on, boarding his plane to London at the end of those three days and spending the entire flight rehearsing his planned speech in his head. He agonized over it, hoping to God that Jon would at least listen and let him say everything that he needed to, but if he threw him out and sent him back to New York Seb wouldn't blame him. He was prepared for all possibilities, but he hoped it wouldn't prove as terrible as he feared.

When he arrived Jon was there to greet him, having just wrapped up a day on set of a movie he'd landed a small but compelling role in. He pulled Sebastian into a hug and kiss and Sebastian suspected a few people snapped pics of their reunion but he didn't care. He put on a brave face and smiled as Jon led him and his luggage to a car that drove them just a few minutes across town to Jon's hotel, and Sebastian was relieved that they'd be alone soon. If he didn't get what he'd done off his chest soon, he was sure that he'd simply just explode.

They had just gotten inside Jon's room and had the door shut behind them when Jon took his luggage from Seb and set it aside, wasting no time in invading his space with a sweet, warm smile and reaching to cup his face with a lowly whispered, "I've missed you, mi vida."

Then he kissed Sebastian with all the pent up love and passion he'd been reining in for three weeks, and Sebastian could feel it in his very soul. It broke his heart and made him feel whole again all at once, a barrage of confusing and overwhelming emotions making him forget about the confession he'd been so eager to give. He melted against Jon and fell into the kiss, having missed the man so much that it was easier than breathing to be pulled back in by him so quickly.

Sebastian didn't snap out of it until Jon started tugging his jacket off, their kisses turning hungry and scorched until Sebastian broke away with a heavy breath. Hands on Jon's chest putting some distance between them he whispered, "Wait, wait."

"Why?" Jon murmured, trailing his lips to Sebastian's neck and making his eyes roll shut.

"Jon, please, I mean it," Sebastian forced out, and Jon pulled away in an instant.

"What's wrong?" Jon asked, surprise and concern etched on his features as he looked Sebastian over.

Sebastian took a deep breath and felt his stomach drop, dread and fear filling him now that the moment had arrived at last and he'd rejected his only way out of it. He clenched his jaw and dropped his eyes, trying to remember the speech he'd planned but now that the time had come... it was all gone. Suddenly nothing felt like the right thing to say and he wished that he could just disappear.

"Sebastian," Jon said quietly, reaching up and touching his cheek. "Are you all right?"

"No," Sebastian admitted, taking his hand and pulling it away. He forced himself to look Jon in the eye and muttered, "I... I don't know how to say it. I fucked up."

Jon furrowed his brows slightly. "What do you mean?"

Sebastian took another breath, feeling ill and terrified but giving himself no choice but to come out with it. "Couple nights ago, um... Chris, he... he showed up drunk at my door. It was late and I was stupid and I let him in and I know that I shouldn't have, but I did and..."

Sebastian trailed off and watched as his words sunk in. Jon's expression shifted from confusion to understanding and then... he wasn't sure. Disappointment, maybe, but not the anger that he would have expected. "You... did you sleep with him?"

"No," Sebastian replied immediately, a little too adamantly. "He kissed me. And I didn't... I didn't stop him. I kissed him back and then when I realized what I'd done I pushed him away and freaked out and made him go, but... I did it."

Jon looked him in the eye until he was finished, and then he dropped his eyes and took a long, deep breath. Then, as Sebastian watched with bated breath and a chest full of anxiety, Jon nodded and seemed to be inwardly debating something. Sebastian watched and waited until he couldn't take it anymore, blurting, "If you want me to go I'll go. I just... I wanted to tell you in person. I'm so sorry. I'm a piece of shit and I fucking hate myself and -"

Jon, aghast at Sebastian's words, shook his head and shocked the other man by pulling him into a hug that was far more comforting than Sebastian felt he deserved. "No, no, Sebastian," Jon murmured. "Don't say that."

Sebastian buried his face in Jon's shoulder, hot tears springing to his eyes. "But it's true," he muttered. "You've been so damn good to me and you deserve so much fuckin' better."

But all Jon did was shush him gently and then lead him to the king sized bed in the suite, sitting him down on the side of it and sitting next to him, keeping his arm around him and placing his other hand on Sebastian's face. "I'm not angry, Sebastian."

Sebastian blinked and sniffed back his tears. "What?"

"I'm not angry," he repeated gently.

"... How? I fuckin'... I cheated, Jon. And with him."

Jon shook his head. "You love him," he stated gently. "I can't change that."

"But I love you," Sebastian insisted. "I swear I do."

"I know you do," Jon assured him. "And you love him, too. It's okay."

"No it's not," Sebastian argued softly. "I hate it. I hate what he does to me and how the second he shows up I just fuckin' lose it. I'm a piece of -"

"Sebastian," Jon interrupted gently, "It's okay to love more than one person. And you are so... sweet and full of love and have so much to give. I would never want to change that about you - it made me fall in love with you."

Sebastian's heart throbbed with pain, his guilt growing immeasurably worse thanks to Jon's seemingly utter lack of anger. He wasn't happy about it but he wasn't mad or particularly frustrated either, and the lack of a conventional response left Sebastian completely unsure as to what the hell to do with himself and his feelings.

"Why don't you hate me?" Sebastian asked quietly, and Jon winced as if the question physically hurt him.

"I've told you before, mi vida - I could never hate you."

Sebastian couldn't help but cry even more at those words. Jon pulled him into another hug, whispering comforting words into his ear and running soothing fingers through his hair. Within a few moments they ended up laying in bed together, shoes and jackets off and Sebastian curled up in the safety and warmth of Jon's arms. His head was on Jon's chest and Jon comforted him until the tears finally stopped coming and his breathing evened out.

Sebastian was exhausted from not only his flight but also from the outpouring of emotion that he was still grappling with. It was surreal in a way, Jon being so sweet and understanding despite what Sebastian had done, and Seb just... could hardly comprehend it.

"Are you sure you're not mad?" Sebastian asked quietly, peeking up at Jon.

"At you, no," Jon replied. "But Chris... he plays with your heart. What he does to you is cruel."

"He doesn't mean to be," Sebastian said, his knee jerk reaction to defend Chris at all costs still very much alive and well. "He just..."

"You make excuses for him and always have. You shouldn't."

Sebastian let out a breath and lowered his eyes, closing them as he snuggled deeper into Jon's chest. "I know. I'm an idiot."

"He is the idiot," Jon chuckled.

"Yeah." Sebastian paused. "But I love him."

Jon kissed his forehead. "But you love him."

Sebastian looked up at him, eyes earnest and honest. "I love you, too."

"And I love you," Jon replied softly, leaning down and placing a soft kiss on his lips.

".... What do we do?" Sebastian asked Jon in a whisper, at a loss for where to go from here.

"Whatever makes us happy," Jon shrugged. "And you make me happy."

"You do, too," Sebastian insisted, meaning it with everything he had in him.

"Then we will figure it out," Jon assured him, kissing him one more time, and somehow despite his guilt, shame, confusion and inner turmoil... Sebastian believed him.

He might never fully believe that he was worthy of Jon's love and forgiveness, but he was grateful more than words could ever begin to say. He wished that his love for Jon would just push his love for Chris out of his heart and into the past, but instead they coexisted for better or worse. He loved them both so damn much and he couldn't imagine that ever changing.

What the hell were they gonna do?

----

The next morning Sebastian awoke to soft, tender kisses on his neck and gentle hands roaming his body, Jon coaxing him into what proved to be the best makeup sex Seb had ever had. A part of him still felt like he wasn't worthy of such pleasure but Jon went to great lengths to convince him otherwise, and Sebastian loved him all the more for it.

The rest of his trip passed by pleasantly and all too quickly, the two men enjoying each other's comforting company and making a few public strolls together. They both had to deal with a lot more paparazzi since coming out but it was a part of life and it rarely bothered them. What did bother Sebastian, however, was the nagging little voice in the back of his head wondering how Chris was doing and if he was seeing the pictures as they hit the Internet. Sebastian wanted to reach out and make sure that he was okay, that he wasn't hurting after what happened, but silence had lapsed between them again and he just didn't know how to proceed.

Sebastian flew home at the end of his trip conflicted and worried but relieved that he and Jon were still together despite his lapse in judgement. Soon after he jetted off to LA for a new film and, for the time being at least, left his problems on the back burner in favor of work. It was a bandaid really but he was used to it.

Three weeks into filming, Jon's project wrapped up and he had a week free to visit Sebastian in LA. He packed up and flew his way, stopping for a layover at JFK that left him waiting for an hour and a half before his next flight began boarding. He grabbed lunch and coffee at one of the restaurants and sat at a table towards the back as he made a few phone calls and texted Seb to keep him updated as to his ETA.

Everything was going perfectly smoothly until he finished his food and happened to glance up at the right moment and noticed a particular patron at the counter waiting on his order. Jon wasn't sure at first until the man turned his head a certain way, better displaying a bearded jaw that a NASA hat and sunglasses couldn't hide, and then Jon knew beyond a doubt who the man was. He took a deep breath and looked away, wondering what kind of ridiculous sense of humor the universe had to cross their particular paths on that particular day.

Then again, maybe the universe had a good reason for it.

He got up and headed to the front of the restaurant, quietly disposing of his now-empty coffee cup and walking the short distance to where Chris stood. He took a deep breath and hesitated only for a few seconds before reaching out and gently tapping his upper arm. Chris immediately swiveled around and, upon making eye contact with Jon, immediately performed his best impression of a deer in headlights.

".... Hi," Chris blurted, eyes wide and mouth hanging slightly open. Jon, not as much of a saint as he seemed to be at times, couldn't deny the little bit of satisfaction he got from Chris' clearly panicked reaction.

"Heading home?" Jon asked quietly, glancing around them to ensure that nobody was watching them or paying them any mind. They weren't.

"No, Atlanta," Chris replied, visibly perplexed by the casual line of questioning. He seemed to just go with it, however, asking next, "You?"

"Back to LA. Sebastian's waiting for me."

Chris stared at him, anxiety sealing up his mouth for once and leaving him speechless. Jon watched him squirm for only a few seconds before letting out a breath and throwing him a bone.

"I know what happened. He told me weeks ago," Jon told Chris, whose brows quirked in surprise. "We don't keep secrets."

"Listen," Chris muttered after swallowing nervously, tone as quiet as possible, "I never meant to -"

Jon held up a hand to silence him. "I don't know what you mean to do. You are always playing with him and coming and going as you please, and he deserves better than that."

"I know," Chris replied, visibly and audibly pained. "And I'm sorry. To both of you. I had no right to do what I did. It won't happen again."

"I think it will," Jon shrugged slightly. "He loves you too much to ever say no to you. And you - I don't know what you want from him but I don't trust you."

".... I wouldn't trust me either," Chris muttered, clearly ashamed. It was all in his blue eyes, plain as day for anyone to see. "I don't wanna fuck you guys up anymore than I already have. I'll leave him alone."

"That's not what I want," Jon shook his head. "I want him to be happy."

Now Chris was really confused. He gave a small shake of his head and furrowed his brows. "What do you mean?"

"He needs you, I think. I can't change that. But unless you stop being a coward and using him whenever you feel like it, you'll never deserve him or his time."

"I'm not trying to take him from you," Chris blinked, unsure of how to take Jon's words. "I just..." he paused and trailed off, eyes averting aimlessly. "I miss him."

"Maybe you should stop missing him and start earning his love," Jon suggested. "Stop breaking his heart."

".... Don't you hate me?" Chris asked, bewildered. "I don't understand."

"I don't hate anybody," Jon shrugged. "Not even you."

A pause of silence passed between them, and then with all the sincerity in the world Chris finally murmured, "I'm sorry."

Before Jon could accept the apology, Chris' order was called out from the counter. He glanced over his shoulder and then back to Jon, who simply moved his hands into his pockets and said, "Have a safe flight, Chris."

"You too," Chris replied, eyes still bewildered as he watched Jon walk away and out of the restaurant.

Nerves now shot, Jon felt the nagging need for a cigarette start to grow as he began heading towards his gate. He hoped that Chris would listen and put an end to this nonsense for Sebastian's sake, whatever that ultimately meant for him and Jon. Whatever came of them in the end, so long as Sebastian was happy and had what he wanted, that was enough for Jon. That was how love was supposed to be - selfless, unconditional.

And maybe not always limited to one person and one person alone.

Taglist: @captainrogerrsbeard @take-me-tom-hiddleston @onehotgreasymechanic @stanclub @time-travel-bouqet @supersmuttyqueernerd @its-a-pretty-interesting-wall @itsstillnotwhatyouthink @lisamott9 @ravensonata @buckmesideways22 @loki7ms @weareallteamcap @laughingatthevoid @nade2308 @wintersoldier1989 @steve-bucky-stucky @loricameback @imagininggirl

#evanstan #kortastan #sebastian stan x jon kortajarena #chris evans x sebastian stan #sebastian stan #chris evans #jon kortajarena #sebastian stan rpf #chris evans rpf #rpf

69 notes · View notes

arethereanyoriginalusernames · 5 years

Text

Top 5 least favorite zoophobia character designs

-----------------------------------

Welp, got the positive list out of the way. Now yet me give you the list inevitably more people will like because everyone apparently likes it when I'm negative. Go figure. Vivziepop has a whole arsenal of character designs, and here are some of my least favourites. Same ground rules for my other list apply here. And first, some dishonorable mentions.

DM 1: Jack and Damian

First things first, I don't hate the designs of the main cast. Yeah, they're simple compared to other designs in zoophobia, but, as I've said before, I like Vivz's more simple designs. But out of all the main cast, I disliked these designs the most for one reason. At least everyone else looked like their respective animal. Spam looks like a fox, Vanex looks like a cat, Kayla looks like a kangaroo, and Zill, despite the crazy colour scheme, looks like an unidentifiable creature. These guys? Damian is supposed to be this demonic jackal, but, if you look up jackal in Google Images, you'll notice that he doesn't really look like one. He looks more like some kind of wolf or fox. I don't mind the ears (hell, the horn-like, long ass ears could be his signature look ), or the eyes (he IS a demon ) but, fun fact, jackals have black ears, a black tail, and a distinct black patch of fur on their backs. Some liberties can be taken with colours, I suppose (I mean, we have a freaking purple cat in our midst, you think I'm drawing the line at the canines? ), but perhaps parts of his fur could be made darker in order to get him to resemble a jackal. Jack is a wolf/jackal hybrid, yet he looks more like a domestic dog or a rabbit. It's mainly his ears that cause the problems. Maybe give him more wolfish ears. Seriously vivz, what wolf or jackal looks like that?

------------------------------------

For this next entry, I shall perform my best Nicholas Cage impression. *ahem*

DM 2 : Most of the Party Dawgs

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH! MY EYES! MY EYES! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!

*cough * Anyways, now that I've finished my hyperbolic reaction to the party dawgs, let me single some out. Koko, Mint, and Raven. Koko (aka the purple one with purple clothes) literally looks like a clone of Mint (the green one). The only differences between the two are colours, hair being parted on opposite sides, and slight clothing difference. And let's be honest, Raven literally looks like another Jayjay. But hey, at least their colours don't make my eyes bleed.

Now onto the list proper.

--------------------------------------------------

5. Tom

Look, to anyone on this site who wants to know what I think of Tom, he's just meh. There's nothing really that special about him. Oh, you're a lonely demon? It's not like we have someone in the main cast like that already. Oh, you can be something of a charmer and attract a lot of ladies? Hi Zill! And Tom's design isn't helping his case. He looks like a recoloured Bozzwick or a genderbent Ink. There's nothing really creepy or strange about his appearance. You could argue that his eyes are strange, but plenty of other characters have strange eyes, and Tom's eyes aren't even the strangest. He doesn't look demon-y. He looks like another edgy teen. And yeah, I might be a hypocrite here because I love Damian's male human design, but in his case it's kind of funny. I mean, it's just amusing to me that someone like Dame (who is also the anti christ ) looks like a hot topic addict. It's just so weirdly fitting it's hilarious. Same can't really be said for Tom though. ....

-----------------------------

4. Styx, Tentadora, and Jillian.

Three way tie! Whooo! Okay, but in all seriousness, I put these guys here because they all suffer the same problems. They need some adjustments to their designs and a change in colour pallets. Go back to ch 3 of zoophobia, and look at how much these guys seem out of place in hell. These three characters become a major distraction as your eye is immediately drawn to them instead of whatever more important scene is going on. Give them a colour pallet that helps them blend in a little more. Jillian, I feel, since the poorer parts of Hell are have a more Western feel, should have a more Western influence since that's where she came from. Maybe give her boots or a bandana. around her neck. Styx needs the most change since he looks like a recoloured Damian. Take the ears and tail away. Perhaps give him a more Victorian influence while keeping Tenta's western influence to represent their clashing personalities. Maybe give Tenta a hat or apron to make her look more like a member of Hell's staff.

3. Elijah

Look, I know a lot of people love his design, but Eli's design bugs me on a couple levels. Why? Well, look at some of the other snake characters that take on a bi-pedal stance, such as Gustav, Quinton, the Max brothers, and Castello. You might notice something. ...slightly different autonomy wise. Look, I appreciate that Vivz is making some of her characters look vastly different than others, but in this circumstance. ...why? Why does Eli get to have a more snakey influence? Shouldn't he resemble Gustav since their both snakes? Why does Eli get to have a snake head, but none of the other snakes do? I know, Dollcreep came up with Eli's original design, but Dollcreep came up with Gustav's original design too. There, we had the same problem with heads we do here, so yeah, this reflects on Dollcreep as well for inconsistency. Besides, Vivz could've fixed this problem while redesigning Elijah. As for the colour pallet, while yes, pink and white are overused in Vivz's characters, I'd argue it makes sense here with Eli being albino. However, I'd make the colours on his face and in his hair lighter. Albinos can't really keep pigments in their skin and hair, so it'd be impossible for Eli to be as... covered in pink as he is. Unless he, for some reason, constantly dies his hair and paints squares on his face. That would actually be pretty funny.

Damian : Eli, you've been in the bathroom for 2 hours, what are you doing?

Eli: Putting pink squares all over my body. As normal people do.

Damian : But...why tho?

Eli: Aesthetic.

-----------------------------------------

2. Jayjay

AAAAAAAAAAAH! MY EYE-- yeah, I'm not doing that joke again.

Look, I liked Jay in the Die Young video. Her colours weren't as saturated and they worked well together. Everywhere else? Not only do her colours clash terribly against each other, with a few exceptions, her colour pallet is always so bright it's actually painful to look at for more than two seconds. Her design in Die Young was just fine. It communicated exactly what it needed to about Jayjay. Not to mention it used contrasting colours in a way that was nicer to look at. Lesson here kids? Jay doesn't need a loud design. She needs and effective design.

Also, any Dollcreep fans who try to come out of the woodwork to say shit along the lines of "Dollcreep did it sooooo much better "

....no he didn't. Get off my front porch, you wannabe edgelords. I'm the non straight edge Lord of social ineptitude here!

And number one goes to......

-----------------------------------

1. Whitney

.....you know, if I didn't already use the Nick Cage joke already, I'd be hamming the shit out of it rn.

Look, I wasn't sure if I wanted to keep this dude on the list, since unlike the others, I dunno if vivz is still using him, and I didn't want to go after a character she may have abandoned, BUT JESUS ALMIGHTY.

This design actually hurts my head when I look at it. Take everything I said about Jayjay and stick it here, except times 100! The colours are far too bright, and clash horribly. ..to quote my buddy, @imviotrash when they first saw him, "What even is Whitney? "

I'll leave so I don't need to look at this much longer, but as usual, tell me what you think!

I apologize for wasting your time.

-ATOUN

Ps. Let me know your favorite or least favorite zp designs! I'd love to see what others think!

#zoophobia

10 notes · View notes

unreone · 4 years

Text

Aren't You Glad to Have a Boyfriend Like Me?

PROMPT: SERIAL KILLER

Time Taken: 42 hrs 14 min (on/off)

Program Used: IBis Paint

Word Count: 4133

♥~♥~♥~♥~♥

She beamed as I present to her my gift. An expensive perfume that she saw on a shop five days ago. She is squealing in delight at the second she recognize it.

"Oh my gosh! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!! I can't believe that you manage to buy it~

How could I even return the favor?"

I laugh at how cute she is being right now. Little did she know, I did not even spend a single cent to get it. Wait...no I actually have. Just not mine.

"Don't worry, Giggles. To see your smile is enough for me to say it's worth it."

Nice, that's a smooth one Cuddles. My remark brought a blush on her angelic face. She then pulls me into a hug, something that I expected to get but could still appreciate.

"Aww, this is why I love you my fluffybuns. I'm so glad to have a boyfriend like you!"

I smile as I pat her head. Her wonderful scent wafts in the air as I caress her soft, pink fur. Oh how much I wanted to stay like this forever. However, a ring destroys the moment.

Both of us stop and look at each other. Withdrawing, she apologize and picks up her phone from her shoulder bag. I watch her expression change from bright to neutral and then grim.

"I know I understand...I will be there as soon as I can."

She ended the call.

"Something's wrong?"

She looks at me with guilt in her eyes. I could tell that she wanted to stay a little bit longer but the call has given her a reason not to.

"I am so sorry Cuddles but I have to go. The nurses who are suppose to work right now got into an accident and Lumpy couldn't handle it all by himself at the hospital. I guess I need to start my shift early."

What a bummer. Her shift is supposed to begin five hours from now. Despite feeling unpleasant, I manage to keep my cool.

"Ah don't worry my love. I understand. Just call me when you need a backup."

"Oh Cuddles. The world will be a better place if critters are as understanding as you. See ya later then. I love you!"

She pecks me in my cheek and runs toward the location of a bus stop. I truly adore her. Cupping my hands around my mouth, I shout out my response.

"I love you more!"

She turns around and copies my volume.

"I love you more than anything!"

Oh Giggles, my love for you is so much that I'm willing to do anything for you...

I wave my hand at her as she runs away. I did not stop until she is out of my sight. I sighed and walks away. I guess I have to continue my mission early too.

Pushing the boulder away from a certain spot, I stoop to pull the hidden latch, opening the entry to a bunker.

Jumping down, I swiftly takes my bag full of supplies and a vacuum cleaner. I also wear the "job outfit" that I borrow from a certain friend that must not be named.

After climbing up the ladder carrying my props, I close the hatch and push the boulder back to its original place.

As I stroll towards the house of my next target, I found myself recounting the moments I accomplished my first goal. It was...exhilarating. The adrenaline I got is much more than the one I have while skydiving.

True, I felt remorse and a tiny bit of guilt after doing it but I'd be lying if I say I regret everything. In the end, watching how that pedobear mofo suffers from my own paws is satisfying, and that's all that matters.

Critters tends to underestimate me since I'm just a kid in their eyes. Yeah I admit that I'm immature most of the times, but that doesn't mean I'm incapable of doing serious stuff. I watch enough movies and documentaries to say I know a thing or two with slaying rivals creatively.

It all starts with swaying the prey. Luring him is unsurprisingly not that hard. I just have to send him pictures and epic one liners on his inbox at that stupid dating app and boom! Charmed. He's willing to meet me at a specific, secluded place only me and him know. Never suspecting anything for a bit. He's like a really dumb fish who suddenly bites the bait despite a hook sticking through it!

As the fool arrived at my rented apartment room, he did not see the lover of the girl he always flirts with. Instead, he sees a purple female bunny wearing a cute outfit named Toodles who is infatuated with him. I let him in and offer snacks and tea, which he blindly accepts. As he eat, we talks just as the way we do in our chat.

I remember how he makes that disgusting face at me that he dubbed as his "fierce and flirty look" from time to time.

I am keeping myself from puking at the moment as he leans forward with that breath, asking me for a dance.

Despite feeling unpleasant, I manage to keep my cool. I did not become the best actor in drama club for nothing. I have to convince him that my character is so into him. So I did what I have to do in my script.

I pull him even closer, catching him off guard and making the pathetic asshole blush. This malicious pervert flipping blush! I can't even express my repulsion against this filthy degenerate.

"Maybe I would if you finish your tea~" I muttered in perfect, feminine tone.

Oh I just really smile as I saw that he finally ingested the damn fluid into his system. He, however, thinks it's because I fell in love with him. He drinks the whole cup in one go!

He was extending his hand out to me, about to say something, but found himself unable to do so. Or do anything else at all. His hand trembles before he collapses to the floor. I giggled as he flops like a fish. His mouth is gaping as he try so hard to breathe. He looks up at me with utter confusion in his eyes. Can't talk dirty now that you're paralyzed huh sicko?

"Nothing personal Disco. It's just that I heard that you're really messing around this town. You're pretty famous for being a headache for everyone. Now, let me tell you something. This is for harassing and killing every girl you encountered ~"

I grab the kettle and pour its boiling hot contents on his chest. Oh how euphoric it was to see him writhes in pain. The scent of his burnt flesh fills the room. I was grinning ear to ear as I watch in fascination how the tea spreads all over his fur.

"And this is for assaulting my brother's girlfriend, Giggles~"

I suddenly smashed the kettle on his crotch. He would be wailing in pain at the time if his throat isn't numb. All that came out in his mouth is pitiful gurgles as he pees on the floor. I move and stand besides his ugly face. My entire body is quivering in excitement and rage as I clutch on the shattered kettle tightly.

"And this is for killing her with a fucking kettle you ignorant pimp~"

And with that, I found myself bludgeoning the shittyhead over and over again with a kettle until he resembles a squashed tomato. I keep bashing on his shattered skull even after he stopped twitching. Finally, I stepped on his heart with my heels to satisfy my ears with that squelching flesh. Then, I went to the bathroom to shower the dye away. It takes me four hours to remove the fake color entirely off my fur. Of course, I did not leave without taking his wallet.

It's been three days since the incident and I haven't seen him around, which is a good sign. What I've done is super effective. I think after all that, he wouldn't bother Giggles anymore. Heck, I am confident enough to say that he wouldn't even dare to look at any girl ... hehehe ... look. Something that my next victim couldn't do. That makes everything easier.

I found myself on front of the house I seek. I casually walk towards the doorstep and press the doorbell.

Now I would have skip Mole over since the idiot mistaken Lumpy as Giggles on their blind date. That means, my motivation of killing him is not jealousy if that's what you're thinking. No. It's something deeper than that.

His obliviousness and idiocy is what ticks me off. He killed my precious girl by literally stealing her heart with a freaking stick. Then he just throws it in a filthy thrash bag like it was nothing. Oh how much I wanted to punch him square in the face when I see him pries the door open. But I didn't.

Sounding lanky and awkward, I announced my assumed identity.

"Randell of Happy Tree Cleaners, leaving your homes squeaky clean. Our company is very sorry since we couldn't send Petunia today. However, I am here to take her place. I hope you wouldn't mind, sir."

"Oh. Of course I wouldn't mind at all lad but I think you came pretty early."

Feigning confusion, I responded to him in a shameful tone (which I applaud myself for such a convincing performance).

"Oh I truly am sorry sir. I'm still new to the job and kinda not listening to my superior when she's passing the information over the phone..."

"Ah a newbie. No, don't worry at all. I actually admire you! Working so hard, always ready to face the task at hand as immediately as possible. You're also modest. You remind me of myself back in my younger days..."

Then a long time was wasted for his flashback that I could not see. I really hate delays but I'm not rushing so I let him do his thing.

"Oh silly me. What am I thinking letting you stand outside for so long! Come, enter my humble abode young one."

I thanked him as I went inside. The contents of my shoulder bag clatters against each other for every move I make.

As he leads me to the room he thought I'd bother to clean, I am appreciating the edginess of the vacuum's flexible hose that I'm holding. I am very proud to say I assembled it myself. I have tried it on cows and boy the precision of the cut was just fascinating. I left a clean hole through the chest of the dumb animal.

My eyes are locked on his back as he talks about taking pictures of a case that an evil mouse wanted or something like that. His keys are jiggling as he unlocked the door to his kitchen. He turns around to face me.

"-anyways, here we are in the kitchen, Early Randell. You may begin your "germ extermination," as Petunia put it."

"Oh, only she could do that sir. I have a different method and it's called "trash assassination."

"Really? Sorry to break it to you son, but I believe there's no such thing that's present in this room. There is just dust and dirty dishes."

"Excuse my language sir, but I could see one standing out in the middle of the room."

"Oh my, that must be the apple that I lost a while ago. Could you please take it out?"

"It's my pleasure to do so. After all..."

In a second, I thrusts the vacuum hose on his chest. It delights me how its end easily punctures through his clothes then his flesh. The idiot didn't react at first and only notice what I'm doing when I successfully take his heart out.

"The only thrash I see in this room is you. P.S. I know what you've done to Giggles. I'll come back if you repeat it again..."

He actually tries to escape but oh its just too late.

Resistance is futile after all, no matter how much you struggle old guy.

A few seconds pass before his body finally went limp. I smile as I let go of the vacuum hose.

Whistling the theme song of this town, I grab his filthy organ off of my vacuum. I take a moment to observe how it weakly pulses on my grasp. I find it fascinating that this thing is still beating despite its raptured state.

Then I pick the note I left from and continued whistling. I dump his heart into the thrash bag filled with decomposing materials and feces. If you're wondering where the heck it came from, its hidden inside the vacuum.

Of course I didn't want his heart to rot alone so I let his body join in. It's hilarious that his body would regenerate in there. Imagine respawning covered with shit.

I take out something out of my shoulder bag. Opening his fridge, I start lacing his food with cyanide. The medicines in his cupboard also get the same treatment. A sprinkle for this, a bunch on that and I'm done.

An hour was spent of taking care of the evidence. Cleaning is boring and tiresome but I have to do it. After disassembling the vacuum, disposing my outfit, sanitizing the floor and taking a bath, I went out of the house. I casually dump the garbages in the bin and then I take my leave. Two down, few more to go.

Up next is Flippy. He may seem to be an invincible rival but everyone have Achilles's heel – and I'm about to strike it. Wait, I'm not literally saying my target is the tendon at the back of his foot. The point is I know his weakness and its pathetic.

Currently, I am on my way to the psycho's location. My ears are flattened on the side of my head because of the hood of the black robe I'm wearing. My smiling skull mask is partially obscuring my sight. I am holding a blowgun disguised as a trumpet.

Anyway, for those who don't know what the flipping pants a blowgun is, it's a long narrow tube that shoots out an arrow or dart when someone breathes into it quickly and forcefully. Its content is not a dart though. It's peanuts.

Leaping few minutes forward, I am waiting at the entrance of an alleyway. My clothing blends well in the darkness. Flippy is visiting his psychotherapist and any minute now, he would leave the building and take the path in front of me.

Flippy... he is once my bro. He used to be the man I looked up on since he is serving the military from the age of 15. I thought he was cool but what he have done states he is far from that. We accepted him in our town and boy do I cursed the day that we did.

Turns out he gains an alter ego from the war who is a sadistic, bloodthirsty demon. Giggles and I have suffered hell from his paws. Now, it's payback time.

My thoughts were silenced by a voice whose source I'm too familiar with. As he walks into the desired spot, I blow the trumpet the hardest I possibly could. He screams, obviously surprised. Wasting no time, I push a certain button which allows air to pass through the blowgun. I watch a couple of peanuts shoots straight into his throat at bullet speed. All of this happened in just two seconds.

It seems that he didn't notice what just enter his mouth since he is busy catching up his breath. He looks stupid with his pupils dilated in fear. I toss the trumpet on the ground and run into the alleyway. He follows me, trying to match my speed. Amusingly, his body did not react instantly as I expected. Maybe it's because the number is fewer than the ones he ingested at the party.

"Darn it kid, why did you-"

It's not too long before he falls because of the tripwire I set up earlier. As I hear a dull thud, I turned around and smile.

He is groaning as his lips inflate. Multiple zits appeared on his face. His allergy reaction has rendered him immobile. I take out a knife from my shoulder bag, making sure he didn't see it.

His paws are trembling as he tried to stand. I am towering besides him when his limbs puffs up like a balloon.

"Something's wrong?"

Listening to his whimpers, I could tell how much he is suffering as his body painfully swells. I smirk as I kicked his ass hard, making him squeak in pain.

"You know you deserve it, Flip. If you can't handle the consequences, then you shouldn't have done these..."

As I said that last word, I throw photographs down for him to see. He knows he's to blame for all the mangled corpses in it. In the middle of it all is Giggles with a rose puncturing through her head.

I am overjoyed when I hear him cry. Oh the taste of victory is truly sweet. As time passes, he looks like a balloon animal more than anything. His arms give up since it couldn't support his weight anymore.

He mumbles something that resembles to an apology, which is empty since I've heard him say it countless times.

"You could only pay for your sins with death."

Desperate to live, he tries to drag himself forward, hoping he could move away from me. It's amusing that such an indestructible beast lives inside this wimp. We both know that those stubby fingers never help him in this situation in any way. It only makes him more pathetic.

I then dug my dull knife into his back and watch as his skin bursts. His body contorted as unimaginable pain washed over his body.

"What? You say you want more?"

I poked his shoulder with the tip of my blade and it explodes. The walls are painted by its disgusting contents. It's like I'm playing with a living bubble wrap.

"You like pain right? Don't you enjoy this? Huh? Huh!?"

I found myself caught in a frenzied mood of hacking and slashing. His body is constantly receiving new, multiple wounds. His ugly face is squeezed against the asphalt road. His head is twitching every time I plunge my weapon into his body.

For the final act, I hit the top of his head and zip his skull open, splitting his brain apart.

Panting heavily, I laugh. I've done it! I've defeated the unstoppable force. I stand to observe my work.

I turned around and meet the eyes of a preschooler dropping his lollipop. I could tell that he was about to take my trumpet when he saw something in the darkness moves. I guess my robe is really black. Imagine a floating skull smiling down at you.

He backs away as he saw the blood dripping from my gloves. I wave hi to him and he runs away. Yep, I just scarred a child's life forever. I have a pretty good feeling that he's gonna have nightmares about a skeleton and a trumpet tonight.

Welp, time to dispose this body. Good thing there's an incinerator conveniently placed at the end of this passage.

Dragging Flippy by his foot, I hum the coffin meme tune to myself. He's not that heavy anymore since chunks of his flesh pops like a bubble earlier. Scrapes form on his skin as I pull him.

With a heave and a ho, to the furnace he go. Don't forget the knife and the costume~

I just finished disposing my stuffs when my phone plays that special ringtone. Picking it up from the shoulder bag, I greet my precious Red Ribbon.

"Heya Giggles~ How are you?"

My expression shifts from bright to grim when I hear her weakly whispers that one word.

"Help…"

This was followed by a thunderous crash and a white noise. My heart sank deep into my guts. Running out, I only have one thing in mind – save her before it's too late.

I'm not really paying attention so I collided with someone riding a bike. As my butt hits the ground, I groan.

"Gah! What are you thinking running into me like that- Cuddles?"

Looking up, it's my best friend, Toothy. As he help me stand up, I quickly steal his ride.

"What in the-"

"Sorry Toots! Emergency, I'll return it later."

Huffing and puffing, I pedal like my life depends on it. Cars are beeping as I zoom by them. I've taken sharp turns and gave heart attacks to crossing pedestrians. I didn't even bother to stop when the traffic light is red. The only thing I care about right now is to get to the hospital as soon as possible.

Smoke is rising from the horizon. It didn't take long before the building came into my view. My heart skips a beat as I see its remnants. My blood runs cold as a thought of her crushed body appears in my head.

I am preventing the tears that is burning my eyes to fall. I hop off the bicycle and run closer. I keep telling myself that I'm not yet late.

Broken glasses are scattered around. Shattered walls are laying against each other. I found an opening and force myself to fit through it. As I successfully did, I start searching for any sign of her.

I am frantically shaking the doorknobs when I heard her voice screaming for help. It sounds faint, which means she's far from were I'm at, but at least I know her direction.

I crawl under a fallen pillar then run to a door I haven't check. As I press my head against it, I hear her whimpering. I started to charge myself against it, my new attempts stronger than the last one.

Hang in there, Giggles...

Out of nowhere, something crash which makes the earth trembles. I press my ears against the door again. She's not making any sound anymore.

This prompts me to try harder. Adrenaline is coursing through my veins as I imagined the worst possible scenario. The door slammed open with the force I've applied. I can't help but stumble forward a little bit after that. There she was, six feet from where I am. I could not believe my eyes for what I'm currently seeing.

The Golden Idol is laying on the floor, crushed into dust. The crying face of my love is kissing the guy I assume is responsible for the damage of the cursed figure. A sun ray, originating from a huge hole at the ceiling, illuminates the spot where the two are standing. Her hands are around his shoulder. Giggles withdraw and mouthed the words "Thank You" to Splendid.

My whole body is trembling in rage. When did we kissed like that? Oh right! When we're fucking dead. I clutch something from my shoulder bag. I coughed loudly, announcing my presence.

The two turn to my direction. She gasp. She's saying words but I could not understand them. A plain smile is painted on my face as I quickly walks towards them. I brush pass the girl who turns me crazy in love.

Splendid chuckles and spreads his arms, expecting a hug. That's exactly what I give him...with an extra stab on his chest with my kryptonut dagger.

He's lucky because I'm not gonna do what I have in mind for him. He kneels and screams as his body quickly degrades. I snap to Giggles with a huge smile on my face...

The grasses sway with the wind. The view of the sunset in this spot is truly romantic. I sigh as I look into her eyes.

"I'm so glad that you could understand me, Giggles. I've only done all of that because of you. Now, nobody would ever bother you and we can stay like this forever~"

I smile as I pat her head. Her wonderful scent wafts in the air as I caress her soft, pink fur. Oh how much I adore her cute face.

"I know you didn't expect me to forgive you after what you've done. That's just how much I love you. I will do anything and everything just to make you smile."

I touch the spot at the end of her lips and help her to smile. After all, she couldn't done that all by herself in this state. I smiled as I remember what she said to me this morning.

"Aren't you glad to have a boyfriend like me?"

♥~♥~♥~♥~♥

Since I turned Cuddles into a killer, does this story counts as a creepypasta?

Writing this is a doozy so I hope you like it the same way that I make it. Write your thoughts down the comments!

0 notes

bandbacktogether · 5 years

Text

A Letter I Can't Send: Edge Of Crazy: Lesson #12

New Post has been published on https://www.bandbacktogether.com/posts/abuse-child-grows-up/

A Letter I Can't Send: Edge Of Crazy: Lesson #12

my dad was, and still is, a serious control freak. he wants everything to go his way, all the time, forever. His need to control + my rebellious streak – any display of love or affection = a seriously fucked up child.

dad,

i’d love to write this on my regular blog, but it would upset the people who know me (and we both know that i shouldn’t upset others, right?), so i’m writing it on the down-low. anyway, this is more for me than for you, because you would never admit to fucking up. mom has put up with a lot of shit to stay married to you for 44 years, but i don’t feel sorry for her because we both know she loves to play the martyr. you two are a textbook case of how not to raise a daughter, and i’ll get to mom in another blog. this one’s for you-

i know that you and mom “had” to get married. i know that you weren’t thrilled about it. i also know that you really wanted a son, but you got me instead. while i made do with the john deere tractor and matching wagon, you and i both know i really wanted the barbie corvette. so barbie and her friends went on lots of hayrides, no biggie. because i loved you.

lesson #1- be happy with whatever i get and don’t be disappointed; any affection i may receive depends on this.

we had fun when i was little. we played football with pillows in the trailer that i grew up in, you pretended to be a horse so i could ride on your back. except you always bucked me off, every time. you’d hide in the bathroom down the narrow hall and call to me and when i came to you, you’d jump out of the dark and scare me. i hated that game, and tried to refuse, but mom would insist i go every time. when mom called that dinner was ready, you’d always hold me back and say that i didn’t get to eat. even though i knew it was a game, i didn’t like it. now that i think about it, your sense of humor was somewhat sadistic. but i didn’t see it that way at the time. because i loved you.

lesson #2 – play along, even when i don’t want to.

when i was small, and did something wrong, you whipped me. you had that fucking collection of belts and always made me pick one. i took a long time choosing, hoping you would change your mind, but you never did. i always chose the red, white, and blue one, because if i had to get whipped, it should be with a pretty belt. and it wasn’t just one or two times. no, you beat my ass. and bare legs. and back. and arms.

i stole some of your coin collection to use in the gum ball machine at the trailer court. it was only a couple of wheat pennies and a dime, but you found me at the gum ball machine and my heart got stuck in my throat. you had a wire coat hanger in your right hand and it was summer and i was wearing shorts. you beat me with that wire hanger all the way to the trailer and that was a long way and i couldn’t run fast because i was only 4. and still, i loved you.

and that time you got mad ’cause mom made chili in july. i was still in a highchair, even though i was 3. i dumped my chili onto the metal tray and you swore at me for wasting food. you grabbed me by my shirt and pulled me out of the highchair. my legs got all cut up because you didn’t take the tray off first. then you threw me on the floor of the living room, and that’s how my favorite top got ripped. then you grabbed a belt from your collection and started beating me and you wouldn’t stop. mom finally pulled you away and threw you out. she let you come back, though. because she needed you more than she loved me. i asked mom to fix my top, but she threw it away instead.

lesson #3 – i am bad, and being hurt by someone i love is acceptable. in fact, i should expect it. i need to learn the art of survival, nobody else is going to protect me.

you have never told me you loved me. never. not once. you have never told me you are proud of me. not ever. not when i graduated from college, or grad school, or got straight a’s, or stuck with my crappy marriage for so long, or left said crappy marriage when it was time. i craved your approval like an addict craves that next hit off the pipe, knowing it will never be enough. and i chased after your approval the way a child chases their shadow, knowing that they will never catch it but always hoping against hope that this time might be different. and i never hated you for it. instead, i hated myself for not being enough.

lesson #4 – it’s not you. it’s me. and it will always be me, even when it’s you.

you had a girlfriend on the side, beginning when i was 5, and ending around the time i went away to college. i know this because i rode the bus with her son in high school. he told me all about how you’d come over on christmas day when he was little. i always wondered why you left after we’d opened presents. you were going to your other family. the one with two boys.

remember that time when i was a senior in high school and my friend viki and i saw your truck at your girlfriend’s house? i rang the doorbell and asked your girlfriend if you were there and i told her who i was. after viki and i drove away, we hid in a driveway and watched you speed past us in your truck, racing towards home. and we laughed because we knew you couldn’t touch me. not unless you wanted to tell mom what you were so pissed about.

mom still doesn’t know about that time i called your girlfriend at work and called her a whore and a bitch and demanded that army picture of you back. the one that mom kept asking about and you kept telling her that you’d left it in your locker at work. only it wasn’t in your locker, was it? it was on your girlfriend’s tv, because her son told me. you brought the picture home that night. that’s when you stopped looking me in the eye and started hating me. because you’d been caught by your daughter. and i began to hate you right back.

and when you suddenly decided not to pay for grad school, i became a stripper to pay for it myself. because i had learned the art of survival.

lesson #5 – i have nothing to lose and it feels good to be a bitch.

you stopped hugging me when i turned 10, and i’m pretty sure it had something to do with my going through puberty. especially when you went on a trip and brought me back that cleveland browns sweatshirt, threw it in my general direction while averting your eyes and said, “here, this will cover up your bumps.” nice way to encourage a young girl to have pride in her body. so i started covering up my bumps, all the time. when i was in my late 20’s, i got rid of my bumps altogether by developing anorexia. then i had to cover up my bones. i began to loathe myself.

lesson #6 – my body is sexual, and sexuality is bad.

the only birthday of mine that you ever came to was when i turned 5. i still remember it because that’s the birthday i got my first barbie. you took her away and wouldn’t give her back. you thought that was funny and i played along so you would stay. to this day, i occasionally find myself playing along, for fear of being abandoned or pissing someone off. when i was 17, you never came to my high school graduation. i know this because when i got home after the ceremony, the ticket i’d left for you on the kitchen table was still there. you were still pissed about me finding you at your girlfriend’s two months prior, and calling her at her job. because i’d stopped playing along.

lesson #7 – when i stop playing along, you will hate me.

in high school, you started to have me followed, instead of sitting me down and asking me about what was going on in my life, you got kids from the trailer court to tell you shit about me, a full $5 for each bit of information. that’s how you found out i smoked, drank, got high, and had a black best friend. you even sent two guys on my fucking spring break trip to daytona beach. i know this because on the last night, we all got drunk together and they told me. then they proceeded to tell me your name, my full name, where i lived and what you wanted to know. i wasn’t even safe from you 1,000 miles away.

can i just tell you how fucked up that is? that is seriously fucked up. i was the most paranoid teenager i knew, even without the pot.

you made me stop being friends with kim, you beat my ass when you found out i smoked and you grounded me for three months for drinking. fuck you. i started getting high with my dealer’s 16-year-old wife before school, i went through the bottle of vodka you had hidden in your cupboard, filling it with water instead. that’s right dad, the more you tightened the screws, the more i fucked up. i went to school drunk every day, or high, or both. i hid beers in my bedroom and drank them when you were asleep. i smoked in the bathroom after you and mom left for work. i feared getting caught, but the rush was incredible.

lesson #8 – my father is out to get me, and he will always find me.

you wouldn’t let me date the same guy twice, because you didn’t want me to get pregnant, the way mom did. you wanted me to get an education and be someone. or something. not for my sake, but so that you could say you had a college-educated child. and i was so terrified of getting pregnant that i didn’t had sex until i was 19. and then i slept with every guy i wanted to when i went away to college. because i could, and you had never taught me to respect my body. you had only taught me to get away with whatever i could. i never enjoyed the sex, but being sneaky felt awesome.

lesson #9 – sex is about power and revenge.

when i was in my final year of grad school, i met my future husband, only i didn’t know it at the time. i was smart and i knew about birth control. but when you should have taught me confidence, i learned fear. where self-esteem should have been, there was an empty well, waiting to be filled by someone else’s ideas and beliefs. fear of abandonment took the place of knowing my own worth. standing my ground was replaced by an aching need to please, at any cost. so when my future husband said “no rubbers, please” i said “ok”. because i needed to be loved, and i was afraid of losing him.

lesson #10 – do whatever i have to do make other people happy. my thoughts and feelings don’t count and should be kept to myself. they will only make others stop loving me.

and then i got pregnant. your biggest fear. and because you were my biggest fear, and because i didn’t believe in myself, and because my boyfriend didn’t want a baby and because i didn’t want to be abandoned, i had an abortion. then the self-hatred really kicked in.

lesson #11 – all decisions should be based on fear.

it has taken me 20+ years to undo what you did to me. everyday i untangle a bit more of the knot, trying to smooth out the yarn. it’s still good yarn, and everyday i knit myself.

lesson #12 – you made me stronger, smarter, tougher and braver. so fuck you.

0 notes