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#and i also wanted to buy a selfie too
lyxchen · 4 months
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Y'ALL I HUGGED CATHERINE TATE!!!!!!
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r0kuta · 5 months
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🤡🤡🤡
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disownedbytiime · 1 year
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My skin has been doing much better. It’s been two months since I stopped the birth control that caused the eczema (and now I’m stopping the one that caused so much inflammation, so let’s see how that goes). This two months I stopped all my skincare routine and I turned it into just two very small things: cleanser and moisturizer (plus sunscreen if I’m going out). I had two different cleansers and two different moisturizers (one was for babies and it’s actually what worked the best) that I alternated, and lord, my skin is so good and smooth. It’s still somehow reddish but more in a healthy red (as opposed to the sickly pale that I used to have or to the flaky and sore red from two months ago) so I’m not complaining.
My nails are so-so. Much better than before but nothing like they used to be before I started taking any kind of birth control. At this point I guess I already realized they’ll never be as strong as they were, but at least they aren’t too brittle. I haven’t painted them in around a year so idk how that will go.
My hair… haha wish it could be better. It’s… I’ve been caring for it and I stopped dying it, but it’s damaged. I’m trying to let it grow but it’s been quite slow. I may change my products but I’m using some very good ones so idk if that will work. Also I’m dying it dark. I didn’t want to in case I still wanted fantasy colours (so I wouldn’t have to bleach it again), but I just can’t stand looking at it anymore. I know I’m gonna miss this almost-white hair but I know I’ll feel much better once I see it dark and won’t be able to see how damaged it is (since it’s more obvious the lighter it is). And maybe once it grows it’ll actually be healthier. I wanted to cut it short and just restart but 😬 I’m having doubts, so dark first.
My legs are swollen and in pain but the doctor said it’ll stop once I stop the pills so hopefully that’ll happen soon.
Anything else is… more or less okay. My allergies have been doing much much better, actually. Nothing like they were a year ago. My period pain (and endometriosis) hasn’t improved at all but at least I’m regular now. Let’s hope the next pills work better (without as many side effects).
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ugh-yoongi · 5 months
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a word from our sponsors | knj
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you’ve co-hosted a podcast with namjoon for three years; have known him even longer. the two of you have always been the picture of platonic, but that hasn’t stopped the internet from doing what the internet does. the shipping? a little weird at first, but you can understand it: two attractive twenty-somethings always in close proximity to one another, obvious (platonic!) chemistry—people have created ships for less. the fanfiction, though? also pretty funny… until you can’t stop thinking about it. 🎙️
pairing: namjoon x f. reader genre: podcast, friends to lovers au; crack, smut, fluff rating: explicit. minors do not interact. warnings: parasocial relationships galore, a m*n with a p*dcast, author abuses italics, swearing, alcohol, reader uses a pseudonym/nickname (piper) because writing the meta fanfiction scene would've been too weird without one and i refuse to use y/n, dialogue-heavy but it is a fic about a podcast, everyone is down horrendous, mentions of social media & fake r*ddit posts, ex-boyfriend yoongi but in a good, healthy way. let me know if i missed anything but mostly this is just two goofballs not realizing they're in love with one another. smut warnings: kissing, oral sex (f. receiving), fingering, unprotected vaginal sex (fiction), protected vaginal sex (nonfiction), a lil squirting, mild degradation, mentions of a p*ss kink but there is no actual pee i promise (...lest?), i didn't intend to write size kink but it's namjoon so it just showed up anyway, slight dom!joon, everyone orgasms. wordcount: 17.5k credits: this was entirely inspired by that one episode of the basement yard where frankie reads the smut fic of him and joe, so credits to both that author and that podcast. spotify, for their podcast name generator. astro-seek for helping me drag namjoon astrologically. an extra special, gigantic thanks to @effortandmore for writing the meta fanfic (3k of it, no less!) and not batting an eye when i said it could have pee in it as a joke. this is as much yours as it is mine. finally, @hot-soop and @the-boy-meets-evil for reading this over for me and telling me i'm funny. author's note: happy birthday, indigo! here i am to validate every fear you've ever had that the people you write porn about may one day read it. live and on air. :)
You’ve co-hosted a podcast with Namjoon for three years.
You can learn a lot about a guy in that amount of time.
None of it is especially salacious. You know all about his family and his dog and the brand of recycled paper towels he insists on buying in bulk. You know what he’d written his grad school thesis on and what he’d looked like in the thick of it, when he was staving off his fifth mental break of the week. You know how fidgety he gets when it’s closing in on Friday night and he’s got a date—how much he stresses over which restaurant to pick, which cologne, which expensive cashmere sweater to wear.
You also know what the internet thinks about him. Intimately.
Kim Namjoon, according to the internet, is peak husband material. He has cheeks ripe for pinching and thighs small countries would go to war to defend. He has a lap that doubles as a seat and dimples people want to get baptized in. He has Instagram selfies with hundreds of thousands of likes and comment sections full of intelligible keysmashes, especially the ones he posts from the gym.
Kim Namjoon, according to the internet, is a man written by a woman.
Looking at him now, you aren’t sure that’s true, you think people just need to raise their standards. Namjoon is just… Namjoon. He’s intelligent and kind and up to date on modern feminist theory, is all. And, sure, maybe in the current political landscape that puts him far above the rest of men, but the way the internet has latched onto him is a little concerning.
“There’s another post about whether or not we’re dating,” you say, pushing your glasses up the bridge of your nose.
sooo let’s be real here, we ALL think they’re dating, right?? Posted by u/pod-shipper 2 hours ago
Just like he always does, Namjoon huffs out a soft laugh, makes his way around to your side of the table. Puts his large hands on your shoulders as he leans in close to read from your screen, snorting every time he reads a sentence he finds particularly amusing. Whichever cologne he’d chosen this morning is, admittedly, very nice.
It’s sooo obvious, especially in the episodes they film and post on YouTube. The way they look at each other?? I don’t even look at my HUSBAND like that! (+1264) ↳ omg ur sooooo right! i could MAYBE buy that they aren’t full on dating, but they’ve def at least slept together. Namjoon is so 🔥🔥🔥 (+791) ↳ um how can namjoon be dating her when he’s already married to me 😌💅 (+3) ↳ For the millionth time, can we not speculate on their personal lives? This is weird and reinforces really harmful ideas that men and women can’t just be friends. (-51)
“How come they never talk about how hot you are?”
You can tell by the look on Namjoon’s face that he hadn’t meant to say that—or, if he did, he didn’t mean to say it like that, with an entire pout, eyebrows raised nearly to his hairline. “Cursed to be ugly and dumb,” you joke to ease the sudden tension, reading the comment that simply says you’d have to be the dumbest person alive to not sleep with Namjoon.
He scrunches his nose at that. Returns to his side of the table. “Yeah, I don’t think so, lots of people haven’t slept with me.” Starts to unpack all the gear from his bag before he says, “Hey, all that stuff—does it bother you?”
“What do you mean?” you answer, the corner of a protein bar stuck in your mouth. Namjoon always insists on recording at the most inconvenient times.
“People thinking we’re together,” he clarifies.
You shrug. “I dunno. Not really. Comes with the territory, I think, not to mention how much you love to overshare—”
“Hello?”
“I’m just saying,” you retort, hands raised in self-defense. “There really was no need for you to mention you blew your grad school stipend on a porn scam.” Namjoon looks affronted, like he can’t believe you’d stoop so low as to bring that up. “Or that you lost your virginity at fifteen.”
“We have a relationship podcast,” he states simply. “That’s kind of what we do, right? Talk about relationships? And the spectrum of human sexuality is part of that.”
You slump back in your chair as you quirk an eyebrow. “No one said it wasn’t, I just said you overshare. Which you do.”
“And that’s why there’s a dozen Reddit posts a week discussing whether or not we’re dating? Because I overshare?”
“Yeah, exactly. That’s the kind of behavior that leads to parasocial relationships. People latch onto that shit. Makes them think they’re your friend.” He glares. “Don’t give me that look, you know I’m right. It’s bad enough you’ve word-vomited all this highly personal information about yourself, but to not even do it under a pseudonym? It’s like you’re begging for trouble.”
Another comment he doesn’t even realize he’s making: “I don’t beg. For anything.”
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To this day, you’re not sure why Namjoon asked you to co-host a podcast with him.
His reasoning had been simple: “You’re my best friend and we don’t agree on anything.” Hard to argue with that. Namjoon has seemingly endless patience, even in the face of things he shouldn’t entertain, and you… do not, to put it simply.
You’re not a cold person. Your fuse isn’t short. You’re just a little jaded, is all. Have far less propensity for bullshit than Namjoon does, so the two of you play well off each other. You end a sentence with a well-punctuated full stop and Namjoon’s right behind you to sigh and say maybe you shouldn’t be so hasty, not everything in the world can be so black or white.
Except some things are. Somewhere along the way, the podcast—which Namjoon had affectionately named Place Him Gently in the Garbage, even though some people should be shoved in there with force—had picked up a following. A big one. And now, every week, you’re inundated with emails ranging in severity. Sometimes people just want to vent after their tenth bad date in a row or share funny stories, and Namjoon lets you take the lead on those, but sometimes it’s a little more serious. That’s where Namjoon shines, all that endless patience, and people love him for it.
“What’s on the agenda today?” he asks, accepting a thick stack of papers from Jungkook.
Ah, Jungkook.
You aren’t sure what he actually does. Some kind of social media manager, which is obvious from the wildly out-of-context clips he posts of you to TikTok, and it’s his responsibility to go through the thousands of emails you get from listeners, but aside from that all you’ve got are your suspicions that he just sticks around to swindle Namjoon out of more and more money.
“I’m in a silly goofy mood,” comes Jungkook’s reply, and you let out a witch cackle as Namjoon winces. Nothing good ever comes of Jungkook being in a silly goofy mood, and that’s quite alright by you.
Fifteen minutes later finds you with a camera in your face that you greet with an unamused, flat stare. Jungkook is used to it by now. Just films for a few seconds before turning his attention to an unaware Namjoon. Head down, pen and highlighter going a mile a minute as he pores over the stack of papers with all the doggedness and eagle-eyed stare of a literature professor.
That’s the thing about Namjoon—he takes this really seriously. So do you, but not in the ways Namjoon does. He’s all skill and determination and you’re color commentary. It works. It clearly works, so you aren’t too bent out of shape about it, but sometimes you worry. Namjoon takes this really seriously and sometimes you worry that he takes it too seriously, that he carries the burdens and worries of all these strangers, that he’s trying to solve and fix things that aren’t his responsibility to solve and fix.
So he takes it really seriously and you don’t take it as seriously as you maybe should, and everything is by design. Balanced.
Twenty minutes later finds you staring across the table at Namjoon, who asks, “Are you ready?” and does one last equipment check before he launches into, “Welcome back to another episode of Place Him Gently in the Garbage with Namjoon and Piper. What’s new with you, Pipe? Any fun news?”
Pipe. It drives you nuts. Feels like nails on a chalkboard. “I see you almost every single day,” you respond dryly. “But for the sake of entertainment, I’m thinking about getting a cat.”
“A cat?” Namjoon parrots, and his eyebrows disappear beneath his fringe because he knows what that means.
You’ve co-hosted a podcast with Namjoon for three years, but you’ve known him even longer.
Since your first year of college, which is also when you met Yoongi. Yoongi, your ex. Yoongi, the person you’d been with for six years and had planned a life around. Yoongi, now one of your closest friends, because the two of you still love one another but no longer in that way, which is fine. But also—Yoongi, allergic to cats.
So, yeah. Namjoon knows what that means, and he has the good sense not to mention it. Unlike him, you’re intensely private and keep your cards close to your chest. Your listeners don’t even know your real name, let alone that you’d gone through a breakup a year ago.
“What kind of cat?” he continues, like his entire world hasn’t just been turned upside-down.
You shrug. “Eh, I don’t know. Probably one that’s been in the shelter a long time, I guess. I’m not too fussy, you know?”
“Right, a cat is a cat,” Namjoon says, thinking he’s done something. You and Jungkook gasp at the same time. “What? Why are you giving me that look?”
“Because that’s a fucked up thing to say! A cat is not just a cat. They have little personalities, just like people. You’ve got—”
“But you just said you’re not fussy,” he interjects. “And I know they have personalities and that you have to find one that suits your lifestyle! Like, you can’t have one of those really cool cats that likes to go kayaking and shit, it’d never work—”
“What does that mean? Why couldn’t I have a cool cat?”
“Hey, all you cool cats and kittens,” Namjoon mocks, and you can tell he thinks he’s done something again, but his impression falls flatter than flat. An awkward silence fills the studio. He coughs. “Anyway. Do you have pictures?”
“Yeah. I also have a list of candidates ranked by how cool their names are. Number five, Casserole.”
“That’s cute.”
“Mhm,” you agree, “but Casserole is a kitten, and I’m not sure I’m ready for that kind of responsibility.”
“They do say you should adopt kittens in pairs.”
“And that’s how they get you. You want one kitten and they talk you into two, and before you know it you’ve got, like, twelve cats. Number four, Party Girl.”
“Sick name.”
“Number three, Toddler.”
“Toddler?”
“Number two, Flat.”
“Just Flat? Understandable.”
“And, finally, number one: Human Torch.”
“Yoooo.” Namjoon laughs. “You have to adopt Human Torch. Let me see.” You pull up a picture on your phone and hand it over. “Okay, for our listeners—Human Torch is a young, male Domestic Short Hair. He has stripes. I don’t know what that’s called.”
“Tabby,” Jungkook chimes in.
“Jungkook says he’s a tabby. He’s cute. Adopt him.”
You return your phone to your pocket. “Maybe. I still think I want an older cat, but I’ll consider it. What about you, though? Any new dating horror stories to share?”
Ah, the dating horror stories. Your most dedicated shippers are convinced they’re fake, that Namjoon just makes them up on the spot to keep them off your trail. If only. Not in the if only they were fake and Namjoon and I were actually dating kind of way, but the holy shit one of my closest friends is a fucking disaster and it’s a little embarrassing kind of way.
“Not really,” he answers. “I’ve got a date this Friday, though. Trying to decide if dinner and a movie is too boring.”
“It’s a classic for a reason. What are you gonna see, My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3?”
“Three?” Namjoon emphasizes, truly sounding scandalized. “Since when are there three? I haven’t even seen one or two.”
“Okay, first of all, the original is a classic and it’s a crime you haven’t seen it.”
“And second of all?”
“There is no second of all. Repeat point one.”
He snorts. “I’m not gonna see that, anyway. Maybe the re-release of Howl’s Moving Castle.”
“Subbed or dubbed, though?”
“Are you trying to get me canceled?”
“Absolutely.”
“I like both,” he chickens out. “Now, let’s stop wasting time and get to the point of the show.”
“Talking about cats is a waste of time?”
“I—no, we’ve just got a lot on the agenda today.”
“Like what?”
“Well, there’s lots to talk about on the celebrity front—”
Namjoon loves this part. As esteemed and educated as he is, not even he is immune to good old celebrity gossip. (Inside him there are two wolves.) Lives for it. Texts you about it at all hours of the night. Sends you links to Reddit threads with hundreds of comments. Has more opinions on Celebrity Big Brother than he does on Ludwig Wittgenstein, sometimes, and when that’s the case you know you’re in for a long evening. You’ve never even seen an episode of Celebrity Big Brother.
But Namjoon loves it, so you’ve become fond of it by association. Reminds you a bit of Yoongi and his love for sports and sports anime.
“—one should we start with?”
“Whatever you want,” you answer, because you haven’t been paying a lick of attention and you aren’t sure it matters anyway. Namjoon can talk to a wall on a good day, but he’s an entirely different beast once mundane, innocuous celeb gossip gets involved.
And even though you hadn’t been paying attention, it seems like this was the right thing to say, because Namjoon smiles so wide his dimples crater his face. “Cool. Let’s start with Taryn Manning. Did you see that bizarre—”
“Who?”
“What?”
“Who is Taryn Manning?”
Namjoon looks a little dumbstruck. Even Jungkook’s arching an eyebrow at you. “Are you serious? She was in Orange is the New Black and Crossroads.”
“The Britney Spears movie?”
“Yeah.”
“Oh. Weird, okay. Continue.”
Your co-host shoots you a very pointed look. “I will, thanks. Anyway, she posted a video on social media talking about this affair she had with a married man. Like, she pulled over on the side of the road to record this. Said she can’t stand the man’s wife because she called her a quote-unquote lunatic.”
“I—huh, thought we weren’t supposed to say that anymore. Alright.”
“But wait, it gets even more bizarre. Listen to this quote—and this is direct. This is a direct quote from the video, I can’t stop thinking about it: ‘Don’t you ever threaten me when your husband came to me to get his butthole licked.’ Can you—”
“What? Namjoon, what in the fuck—”
“It’s crazy, right? She was gonna buy this guy a boat.”
“Namjoon, this is a family show, you can’t just talk about ass-eating unprompted.”
“No it’s not.”
“Well, you still shouldn’t talk about ass-eating unprompted. It’s unbecoming.”
“You’re unbecoming,” Namjoon fires back, because he can’t help it. The words are out of his mouth before he can think. “Sorry, that was out of line.”
You sigh. Know whatever look Jungkook is catching on his camera right now is exasperated and pointed, the corners of your mouth probably tugged up just a hint. “Unbecoming, like I said.” Namjoon scoffs. “Anyway, so this actress was gonna buy this married guy a boat and was eating his ass?”
“Yeah. Apparently it was her friend’s husband? They all went to a Taylor Swift concert together.”
“Jesus, this keeps getting worse. Big year for Hollywood cheaters.”
“It is, right? Cheaters and divorces. Something in the water, I guess.”
“I saw the astrology girlies saying a bunch of planets are in retrograde, so—”
“Can you explain that to me? Like, what does it mean for a planet to be in retrograde? Why is it causing divorces?”
“I don’t know, I’m not an astrology girlie. That’s why I said the astrology girlies. What are your big three, though?”
“What’s that?”
“Your sun, moon, and rising signs.”
“How do I find that out?”
“Ugh,” you intone, “don’t worry about it, I’ll do it myself. What time were you born?”
Namjoon rattles off a time.
You grab your laptop. Pull up the page, type in Namjoon’s date of birth and birthplace, and wait. Then you’re staring at a circle with a bunch of lines in it that also don’t make a lick of sense to you. You roll your lips to keep from laughing and school your voice into something deadly serious. “Bad news: it says you’re a virgin.”
“Virgo,” Namjoon corrects, not taking the bait. “I already knew that.”
You scroll a little further down the page. “Your moon is in Sagittarius. Oh god, listen to this, they’ve got you pegged: ‘The greatest need is to always search for something. In order to feel safe you need a philosophy or belief’—”
“Haaa, that’s not—”
“—’You need to have a goal or mission that gives your life meaning. Your faith must be voluntary and it is a paradox that fighting against dogmas may lead you to other dogmas.’ Yeah, that’s you.”
“That could apply to anyone,” he argues. “There are seven-billion people on this planet; I’d imagine a sizable amount of them would say that also describes them.”
“Hm, sounds like your faith in astrology is not yet voluntary. Did you know you’re a Scorpio rising?”
“No. I’m sure you’re gonna tell me all about it, though.”
You smile. “Correct. ‘People with Scorpio on the Ascendant need to fight against dark and destructive power in their life.’ Is that true?”
“Yeah, you’re the dark and destructive power. You keep sidetracking me and we need to get to the point of the podcast.” He grabs the stack of papers Jungkook had given him. Looks more highlighter than paper, if you’re being honest. “I guess Jungkook thought we needed a lighthearted kind of day.”
“That was nice of him, considering what he gave us last week. I guess we’re allowed to have faith in humanity today.”
To your left, Jungkook scoffs.
“Alright,” Namjoon starts, putting on his Very Serious Podcast Guy voice, “first up we’ve got a question from one of our listeners in Canada. It says, ‘Hi, Piper and Namjoon. I recently agreed to go on a blind date with a friend of a friend. She said he was a bit old-fashioned but really talked him up so I thought I was in good hands—and then he showed up to get me in a ‘67 GTO and exclusively referred to me as doll. He didn’t use my name once. I’m torn, because he was really nice and I had a good time otherwise, but this is weird, right? Should I see him agai—’”
“No,” you interject.
“Can I finish?”
“You don’t have to. This guy sounds greasy.”
Namjoon pinches the bridge of his nose. “And why is that?”
“Ignoring the fact that this guy has arguably one of the lamest classic cars around, he didn’t use their name once? Not once, in all the time they spent together? That’s really disrespectful.”
“Some people are just pet name people,” Namjoon argues.
“With absolute strangers, though? It’s really giving the impression that he didn’t even know it, not to mention some people are uncomfortable with pet names. The whole shtick is super lame.”
“I agree it sounds a bit misguided, but—”
Ignoring Namjoon, you say, “Sorry you had to go on a date with the ghost of less-cool James Dean. Into the garbage he goes.”
And, just like he’s done a million times before, Namjoon rolls his eyes and says, “If you really like this guy and want to see him again, a bit of communication will go a long way. Tell him the pet name made you uncomfortable—if it did—and offer to pick him up for the next date. I don’t think he’s completely destined for the garbage, yet.”
“You’re just saying that because you don’t have a license. You probably think a 1967 Pontiac GTO is the pinnacle of romance. That’s probably like picking someone up on a Specialized Aethos to you, eh?”
“That’s a fifteen-thousand dollar bike, I’ll have you know.”
You groan. “Oh my god.”
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Ep: #183 - Namjoon is a Virgin
I think Namjoon had the right idea on this one. Sure, the car can be considered lame, but I think a lot of men are deeply insecure and therefore overcompensate when it comes to dating. Women are hard to impress when they have unlimited options. You have to stand out, so I’m glad he advocated for him. Piper can come off like such a misandrist sometimes. (-649) ↳ just shut up bro namjoon would fuckin hate u (+204) ↳ Imagine caring about something like this when they’re getting a cat together 🙄 (+19)
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You think about the cat thing for nearly a week.
Adopting a cat is certainly not the worst idea you’ve ever had, and truth be told it’s been a little lonely, living by yourself. No more Yoongi in your space; no more Holly. So, having a new little friend around might do you some good.
It’s just—
It’s a big commitment, and there’s also the dog sitting-shaped elephant in the room. Ending things on good terms means you’re still Yoongi’s second-choice sitter whenever he has to go out of town, and while you love Holly dearly (the two of you had adopted him together, after all), he’s a lot like his father in a lot of ways.
Should I get a cat, you type out, and it’s only been in Yoongi’s inbox a few seconds before the most unflattering picture you’ve ever taken of him is flashing across your screen.
“Are you dying?” you ask, because Yoongi doesn’t call you for much else.
And you already know what his response is going to be. “We’re all dying.”
“Lighten up, Yoongi. One might say being so existentially nihilistic before noon causes wrinkles.”
There’s a split-second pause. “It’s nine p.m.”
“Sure, but it’s before tomorrow’s noon, so it still counts.”
“Whatever. Listen, before you adopt that cat, I need a favor.”
“You going out of town again?”
“Yeah. Shouldn’t be long, though. A week at the most, five days if I’m lucky.”
“That’s fine, bring him over whenever. Yijeong’s busy?”
This pause is far, far longer. “No,” comes Yoongi’s eventual response, but it’s slow. Unsure. A two-letter word has never taken so long to say in the history of ever. “He’s, uh. Coming with me?”
Oh, you think. This is where your ex awkwardly and hesitantly breaks the news of his new relationship. You’ve known this day was coming, and this is what you get for staying friends with him. “This is a fanfiction plot,” you accuse. “Hot, mysterious man moves into a gaudy apartment complex after ending a long-term relationship and meets his equally-hot and mysterious neighbor and they fall in love.”
“I—that’s not—my apartment is not gaudy.”
“Yes it is. There’s a giant gold bust of a weird bird in the lobby.”
“Weird bird?” he parrots. “It’s a swan.”
“I see you’re not denying the in-love-with-your-neighbor accusations.”
“Am I on trial?” Yoongi retorts, and it’s such a Yoongi thing to say when what he means is, is this okay? He means, are we able to talk about this without it being weird? He means, I won’t ever say as much out loud, but your acceptance means a lot to me, and I’d like for you to give me this.
So you lower your voice and soften the edges because it’s not really something to joke about, and you say, “No, of course you’re not on trial,” and Yoongi knows what you mean. “And if you were, you'd get locked up for fifty years. You can’t lie for shit.”
There’s a beat of silence before he clears his throat, mutters a thanks that is so quiet you almost don’t catch it. “Send me pictures of the cats.”
Later on, once you’re freshly-showered and tucked into bed with a candle and a book (Eloge de l’amour by Alain Badiou at Namjoon’s insistence and request), your phone buzzes with a text from Yoongi—
Yoongi: toddler is a fucking hilarious name for a cat but so is flat Yoongi: it’s a tie for me You: Okay well pick one 🙄 Yoongi: yijeong says get both You: Both???? Is he paying my vet bills? Yoongi: kinda out of line to proposition him for money. flat is also good with dogs, js You: If he’s now being raised by you two, my perfect, well-behaved son is probably long gone. Does he even count as a dog anymore? Yoongi: me and yijeong both say fuck off Yoongi: holly too. he says he doesn’t miss you anymore and he’s not coming over now Yoongi has added Yijeong to the group Yoongi has changed the group name to #ThirdWheelChat Yijeong: Please don’t drag me into this. Also I did not say “fuck off” You have changed the group name to People Who Have Seen Yoongi Naked Yoongi: fuck you
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You should’ve known something was going on with Jungkook, because it’d started like this:
(When you and Namjoon started the podcast three years ago, it was in the living room of his apartment.
Surrounded by books and plants. He loved to record in the afternoons back then—Namjoon loved to say it was because of his grad school schedule, but you’ve always suspected he just wanted to preen in the golden hour light, much like he’s doing now.
“Is this really necessary?” Jungkook whines from his spot on the couch. He’s already swindled Namjoon out of two bags of microwavable popcorn and three cans of sparkling water. “It’s a Saturday afternoon; I could be doing something so much more fun than this.”
Namjoon scoffs. “Are you saying this isn’t fun?”
“Yeah. It sucks, actually. This could’ve been an email.”
And because Namjoon is accomplished, mature, and absolutely incapable of not taking Jungkook’s bait, the space between his brows creases as he sends a murderous glare Jungkook’s way. “Stop eating my food, then. And drinking my drinks. And lounging on my couch like that—”
“I’m not lounging,” Jungkook argues.
“You’re manspreading all over the leather!”
“This is how I sit!”
“Well, knock it off! My couch is only for fun and people who think I’m fun!”
Jungkook rolls his eyes. “So you fuck on it?”
“What?”
“What other fun things could you possibly do on a couch?”
Namjoon blinks. “Watch… watch a movie?”
Jungkook groans, throws himself backwards against the pillows as if he’s suffering a Victorian ailment. “Jesus. No wonder you can’t score a second date.”
“Okay, that was a little uncalled for. There are a ton of reasons a person might not want a second date, and no one is obligated to go out with me—”
“Uh-huh. Anyway—”
You clear your throat. Try to hide your own can of seltzer you’d taken from Namjoon’s fridge in the midst of his and Jungkook’s bickering. “Not trying to be rude, but I have an appointment at the shelter at three. If, y’know. You wouldn’t mind speeding this up a little.”
“Oh! Yeah, of course—”
“Oh, so you’ll speed this up for her but not—”
Namjoon pinches the bridge of his nose. “She,” he begins, jerking his thumb in your direction, “isn’t needlessly complaining and actually has someplace to be.”)
It was just a quick little rendezvous in Namjoon’s living room to come up with a rough draft for the following month’s episodes. He couldn’t do it over text because he’d fallen down the steps at his office and landed on his ass on the corner of a step and his phone had been in his back pocket. Cracked clean in half. And he couldn’t do it over email because he—rightfully—knew Jungkook would ignore them because he has his inbox set up to send all of Namjoon’s personal emails to the trash.
But Jungkook holds onto things like that. Grudges. Loves to let Namjoon think bygones are bygones and pop up a few days later with some evil scheme. Hence:
“What is this?”
Jungkook smirks. Rocks back on his heels. “It’s fanfiction.”
“I can see that, but… why?”
This is where Jungkook shines: the ominous, cheshire cat grin; the aw, shucks demeanor that gaslights Namjoon into thinking Jungkook couldn’t possibly be fucking with him. “Well, you were having trouble coming up with ideas for episodes, and there’s an email in there from someone whose partner reads really expli—”
“Jungkook, this is fanfiction about me.”
You can’t help the laugh that escapes you. Of all the weird shit you’ve seen on the internet (and there’s been a lot), fanfiction of people you know—your friends—was something you’d managed to escape. Probably by virtue of not knowing anyone famous enough to warrant fanfiction being written about them.
But you should’ve known. You really, really should’ve known.
“Oh my god?”
You’re not sure who says it. Could be you or Namjoon, but the sentiment is the same. He mouths a what the fuck at you that’s met with a shrug. You’re in uncharted territory now, too. “Where did you even find this?” you ask, taking the stack of papers from Namjoon. “And why did you print it out?”
“Because I’m going to track down whoever wrote it and get them to autograph it. Then I’m going to buy a nice frame and hang it on the wall behind him, so we never forget this historical moment in Place Him Gently in the Garbage lore.”
“It’s a podcast,” Namjoon deadpans, “how can it have lore? And how much lore can there possibly be?”
“It’s the internet,” you concede. “The lore possibilities are endless. Don’t tempt them.”
Jungkook nods sagely, well-versed in the degeneracy of the internet. “Yeah, that’s how you end up with shit like 4chan.”
“4chan? There’s Space Jam porn on there.”
As the youngest, all Jungkook can do is roll his eyes. “Sometimes explaining this shit to you feels like trying to teach old people how to rotate PDFs—”
Namjoon scoffs. “I’m not that bad. I know how to rotate a PDF.”
Wow, Jungkook mouths. “Anyway, back to the fanfiction—”
“I don’t want to talk about it,” Namjoon interjects. He looks at you. “It’s weird, right? Like, it’s weird that people have written this about us?”
About us.
Your scope of the world narrows to the size of a pinhead. It’d just been about Namjoon before. This is fanfiction about me, he’d said, and you hadn’t been included in that. Now it’s written about us and you’re included.
“I—what?”
“It’s about us,” Namjoon repeats.
Jungkook rolls his lips. “It’s about the two of you fucking, to be specific.”
“Can you not—”
“Fucking a lot,” Jungkook continues. “So much fucking.”
Namjoon looks at you, and it’s all you can do to keep from laughing. The look on his face is pure bewilderment, both that Jungkook has cooked up this idea and is hell-bent on executing it and that he remains employed. And maybe it’s a little bit of nerves, too, because neither of you are ignorant of the risks. Reading fanfiction about yourselves—about the two of you as a couple, specifically, or at least two people who have sex—is weird. Not something you can unread.
And maybe it’s because you’re so determined to not make it weird that you send Namjoon a cheeky, exaggerated wink, shrug your shoulders, and say, “I’ll need a couple drinks, but I’m down.”
Jungkook throws his head back and cackles wildly, and that look of bewilderment on Namjoon’s face morphs into something else. Trepidation, maybe; definitely disbelief, because sometimes he lets himself get swept away in Jungkook’s schemes, but it’s rare that you follow suit.
As Jungkook continues to laugh, you wonder if you should’ve said no.
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Namjoon has two stipulations: the two of you have to film the episode completely alone, and he, too, needs to be a little drunk.
The latter? Piece of cake, considering Namjoon has become some sort of whiskey aficionado in recent years. His drinking is streamlined and to the point—he knows exactly how much and what to drink to get him where he wants to be. You can’t say he isn’t efficient.
The former, though? Borderline impossible. From the second Namjoon states his terms, Jungkook is having none of it. Argues that he’s the one who found the story and the one who cleared it with the author, so he deserves to witness the fruits of his labor.
“No,” Namjoon repeats for the nth time, “no way. I’ll barely be able to do this with just her, let alone both of you.”
And that—that doesn’t bother you, right? You force a laugh, because why would it bother you?
There are few secrets between you and Namjoon, except your respective sex lives have been staunchly off-limits. Namjoon could be a virgin for all you know, and as you study him—the way he keeps bobbing his leg, the slight shake in his hands—you wonder if that’s the reason he’s being so weird about this.
It’s just a story.
Fiction.
Most people don’t have to worry about someone writing stories about them fucking their friends. If they do, you reckon even less actually read them. So, sure, it’s a little strange, but people from all over the world send in stranger stuff all the time, don’t they? It’s literally the reason you’re in this predicament.
Eventually Jungkook agrees. His whining has gotten him nowhere, so he just throws up his hands. Posts a cryptic little “u guys won’t believe what the next patreon ep is lmao” that sends the internet into a frenzy. Doubles your Patreon numbers almost immediately, and both you and Namjoon do a good job of pretending the pressure isn’t overwhelming.
Jesus. You have to read explicit fanfiction about yourselves. On camera.
Namjoon gets caught up with work and isn’t available until the weekend, so you’re forced to sit with the nerves for a few days. Not too bad at first, but you’re nearly coming out of your skin by Thursday with the need to know. You’re well-versed in the world of fanfiction, but this is fanfiction about you: your name, your likeness, maybe even your personality.
What will they know of Namjoon, though?
Will they get it right, the way he looks with his jaw clenched? How impossibly deep his voice can go, both when it’s raspy with sleep and when he’s fully at ease? Will the Namjoon in the story be closer to the Namjoon you know, or the version of himself he presents to the public?
And you’ve known him a long time—long enough that there are few secrets between you, but you don’t know the most intimate parts. All the parts the internet loves to speculate on. All the little gaps that, apparently, need to be filled in by fanfiction.
Will they know what Namjoon looks like when he gets off?
No, you scold yourself, jerking awkwardly like you’ve been burned, and neither will you.
Because you are not going to think about this. Your thoughts are not going to go there. Namjoon is your friend, and you’ve listened to him scold an endless amount of men on the podcast for exactly this behavior. Sexualizing their friends. You’re not going to do it, too.
Maybe that’s why you’re kind of seeing double when it comes time to record. Namjoon needed an extra shot and offered you one as well. You’d necked it without a second thought and now you’re here, trying to ignore the slight tilt of the room as Namjoon adjusts the camera.
“How’s the shot look?” he asks, gesturing vaguely behind him at his laptop screen because Jungkook had refused to lend you his fancy cameras if he wasn’t allowed to be involved.
It’s a completely normal question.
It’s a question you’ve asked and answered a million times.
Except—there’s something horribly distracting about Namjoon in this moment. The outline of his back muscles through the thin fabric of his t-shirt. The way the sleeves are tight around his biceps. He’s always been a gym rat, always carries around a protein shake that smells and looks completely foul, but you can’t remember it ever being this obvious.
And you take too long to answer, because Namjoon straightens up just enough to send you a concerned look. Which does not help. You are not imagining what else might cause his brows to pinch like that, what might have his lips parting, have sweat dotting his hairline.
You swallow. Hard.
“Looks fine,” you manage to say. He’s still staring. Are you on fire? You feel like you’re on fire, which would make sense. Would explain Namjoon’s sweating and concerned stare and the fact that he cannot stop staring at you. “Maybe a tiny bit to the right if we’re being picky,” you tack on, hoping it’ll break whatever spell the two of you are ensnared in.
It works. “To the—the right, yeah, makes sense,” he rambles.
He moves it an inch to the left.
Things are tense, to say the least.
Recording hasn’t been this awkward since your first episode, or maybe ever. You’re sat across from one another like you always are, and usually Namjoon would be making quip after quip by now, talking endlessly until Jungkook shushed him long enough to get the intro filmed. Now, there’s just silence.
“Should we…?” Namjoon startles. Bangs his knee on the underside of the table and drops a string of curses. “Sorry, are you—”
“I’m fine,” he says, cutting you off. He gestures vaguely toward the camera. “I’ll just… yeah.”
Showtime.
You wipe your hands on your jeans, unsure of when they got so damp. Unsure of when you’d grown so nervous, too, because you’d been fine an hour ago. Had strolled in with two cups of tea and a little too much confidence, giddy at what you were about to do.
Maybe the nerves had shown up alongside the alcohol. This sounds reasonable, and you do not, under any circumstance or for any reason, think about Namjoon’s back. Or his biceps.
Namjoon makes it through the intro, dimples deep and wide as he smiles, and you also don’t think about the way his voice cracks and gets a little breathy when he introduces you. It’s only because he’d been drinking, and the flush on his cheeks attests to that. The same flush that creeps down his neck, still a little sweaty; disappears beneath the hemline of his shirt.
“—Jungkook had. Right, Piper?”
Now it’s your turn to startle, and there’s not much you can do to hide the obvious except ask Namjoon to redo the shot. Because it’s bad enough the internet already overanalyzes every move you make, every word choice, every instance you’ve stared at Namjoon a second longer than they thought you would—this is a blatant display of… affectedness.
“Sorry,” you say, “I wasn't paying attention. Can we redo it?”
You’re expecting a playful scolding. A ha ha, get it together, because that’s what you usually get. But there’s nothing aside from Namjoon studying you and nodding. Asking if you’re okay. Saying, “Is this—this is weird, right? Is it too weird? Maybe we shouldn’t—”
An out. Namjoon is giving you an out, and you should take it, you know you should take it, so there’s absolutely no reason at all you shake your head and say, “No, no, it’s fine! I think I’m just a little, uh. Drunk?”
“Are you sure? We can—”
“It’s fine, Joon,” you insist. “Besides, it’ll be good content, right?”
“Good content,” he parrots. “Yeah, for sure.” He fidgets in his seat, runs his hands down the span of his thighs. Very, very thick thighs. “I’ll grab us some water.”
You faceplant onto the table as soon as he’s out of the room. When did his thighs get so thick?
But the water helps. Cures whatever strange, insatiable thirst has come over you, because you feel much more human after a few glasses. Less drunk, too, which makes sense. Yoongi could barely escape your drunken, horny wrath when the two of you were together, so you chalk it up to a Pavlovian response.
Namjoon does the intro again. Introduces you strong and steady, not a hint of nerves, and explains, with a fresh blush taking over his upper body, what the episode’s going to be about. “Someone wrote fanfiction about us,” he says, scratching at the back of his neck. “It’s, uh, pretty explicit. Jungkook thought it’d be funny if we read it.”
You snort. “He might get fired, depending on how this goes.”
“He should get fired regardless,” Namjoon deadpans. “Anyway, we have permission from the author to read this so don’t come after us, and, as always, we’ll put all the credits in the video description.”
“Special shoutout to Jungkook, though, who was not allowed to be here with us for this momentous occasion.”
Namjoon laughs. “I’m sure he’s having plenty of fun at home.” You both pause. “That’s not—I’m not implying anything with that! I just meant—you know, like. He’s hanging out and enjoying his day off.”
“Uh-huh.”
“Moving on. I have two copies of this. Do you want your own?”
You grin, wicked and wide. “Nah, just read it to me.”
“Making me do all the work,” he huffs. “Typical.”
“There’s a stack of papers in front of you that might say otherwise.”
It’s clear you catch him off-guard. He cocks an eyebrow, opens and shuts his mouth a few times like a goldfish. An obvious question sits on the tip of his tongue: You think you’d be in charge? Instead he coughs, jerks his head to the side, and says, “I guess we’ll see.”
It sounds like a challenge.
Thirty seconds is all you get before Namjoon’s shuffling his stack of papers and clearing his throat. Asking if you’re ready and jumping right into it once you say you are. Reads the first few lines like they’re some old lecture notes, and they’re conservative and safe-for-work enough that you start to relax.
And then Namjoon reads, “A louder one wonders if Namjoon is a pet name person—if he’d call her ‘honey,’ or ‘gummy bear,’ ‘babe,’ or ‘baby,’” and you choke.
“Gummy bear?”
Namjoon laughs along with you—the weird one that almost sounds like a dog panting. “You want me to call you gummy bear?”
“I want you to call me a Lyft,” you snark. “I’m leaving.”
He continues:
And that’s how it starts, wandering thoughts, wandering fingers—the first time Piper comes to the thought of Namjoon calling her baby, pushing inside her, showing her that he definitely doesn’t beg, but she does… Well, she’s a little ashamed. She’s apparently got a reputation to maintain, anyway, not to mention a friendship.
His eyes leave the paper and lock onto you. “Or maybe you’d prefer baby?”
“Fuck off.”
Weeks after that first time, it’s become a habit, thinking about Namjoon as something more than a friend. It’s confusing and a little mortifying and it’s starting to affect her in ways she hadn’t expected. When they record, she feels fidgety—she’s jumpy when he gets close, has all the stupid obvious tells of an unwanted crush: her breath hitches when he whispers (why the fuck is he whispering in her ear, anyway? Doesn’t he know what that does to a person?) inside jokes to her so Jungkook can’t hear, her heart rate spikes when their fingers accidentally brush, she feels itchy and hot and a little embarrassed whenever he holds eye contact with her. It’s terrible, and it’s only made worse by the way he’s doing all of those things more than usual. Or, at least she thinks he is, thinks she’s not imagining the way his eyes linger on her more than she can remember happening before or the way she’s caught him staring at her lips when she chews on the end of her pencil mindlessly. 
You’ve completely forgotten how to breathe.
Namjoon’s staring again. You need to salvage this. He’s only on paragraph three and you’re already squirming in your chair and imagining things that are not appropriate. So you roll your lips, return his teasing. “Well? Do you stare at my lips?”
It works. “No,” he scowls.
“You sure?” you joke, morphing your face into something half-pout, half-duck face.
“We’re never gonna finish this if you keep making comments.”
“You started it,” you point out. “Go on, then.”
There’s some dialogue. Some prose that hits way too close to home, has you wondering who on earth wrote this and how they plucked every single thought from deep within your psyche. A pang of fear that maybe you haven’t been as subtle as you’d thought all these years. A moment to confirm to yourself that, no, you haven’t been harboring a secret, deeply-buried crush on Namjoon.
Then he reads—
And then he kisses her. It’s greedy and hot, his lips like a branding iron. She moans a little against her better judgment when he licks at the seam of her mouth, and in return, she can feel Namjoon’s lips curve into a smile against her own. It’s better than she’d been imagining it, really. He’s a good kisser—firm at the right times, soft when she needs it, careful but not cautious. He holds her jaw with one hand and keeps her right where he wants her beneath him (as if she’d want to move, anyway).  When their lips finally part, he rests his forehead on hers. It’s intimate in a way she hadn’t expected, and he looks at her as if she’s the answer to every question. Finally, he whispers, “What’re we doing, Piper?” His lips are still wet and pink and a little swollen from kissing, and she barely hears the question—she’s too busy thinking about kissing him again, about pulling his plump bottom lip between her teeth, teasing and…  “Kissing,” she says finally.  “What do you want?” he asks, sinking to his knees in front of her. And if that alone isn’t an answer to his question… “Whatever you’re willing to give,” she replies. It feels like she’s wanted this forever, this and so much more. Once she got the idea in her head, it’s hard to know if she ever felt differently, ever truly thought they could just be friends. Or, if in the back of her mind, in the dark corners that she never lets see daylight, she always knew she wanted Namjoon. Always knew she loved him.
—and everything goes right out the fucking window.
Namjoon sits with those words for a moment. Scans the paper in his hands and frowns a little when he confirms what you already know. “The rest is, uh. Porn.”
“That is why we’re here.”
“Last chance to back out.”
“I’m not scared,” you lie. “Are you? You’re the one who keeps stalling.”
He huffs. “You’re a pain in my ass,” he retorts, and then nothing is all that funny anymore.
Because Namjoon was right: the rest is straight-up porn. He’s barely able to read the part where he goes down on you with a straight face, turning a deep shade of crimson. Stutters through the part where you pull his hair, and that is not something you needed to know about your friend. You think he loses his grasp of language entirely when he reads, “When he slides a long finger into her and brushes past her most sensitive spot, she arches into him and lets his name fall from her lips in a soft cry. Piper, notorious skeptic, is a babbling, trembling mess as she gets closer to her orgasm,” because all the words are garbled together, producing nothing but gibberish. You think he’s ready to keel over and die when he reads, “Namjoon pulls away briefly, lips slick with her juices, and licks over his top one, pausing to tell her how good she tastes before he dives back in.”
“That was nice of them to include. I appreciate their attention to detail in regards to my personal hygiene.”
“This is so embarrassing,” he whines.
You roll your eyes good-naturedly. “Gimme. I’ll finish it.” He hands over the papers immediately.
Except you regret it immediately. The words you’re staring at are not words you ever thought you’d read or recite in your entire life. Not even for a million dollars. “Oh,” you say instead.
“See? Not as easy as it looks.”
“This is really embarrassing,” you confirm. “I might need another shot.”
“Y-yeah. Alcohol sounds good.”
Namjoon staggers forward obligingly, looks completely fucked out and pliant, willing to do whatever she asks. She remembers the sounds he made when she pulled his hair, wonders if he likes being bossed around, if he wants her to tell him what to do, to be a little mean to him. Maybe it’s different from her dreams, maybe he will beg her. She wants him so badly, she’d do anything for him. So, she pulls his briefs down to expose his absurdly large member, already mostly hard, and slaps it. Gently at first to see how he’ll react, and when he shudders and jerks his hips, she does it again, a little harder. “Look at you,” she whispers, “such a needy boy.”  He whimpers at that, eyes pleading. “Please, Piper…” he whines.   “Please what?” “Please let me fuck you,” he begs. She wants to, wants him so much, wants to feel him stretch her open, and from the looks of his cock, thick and long and drooling with precum, he could. “Should I?” she asks. She musters all her confidence to keep the condescending tone up. It feels wrong given how desperate she is to get him inside her, but it also seems to be getting him worked up and equally as desperate. “Do you even know what to do with that big, stupid cock?”  Namjoon’s cock twitches, and he begs, “I—I’ll fuck you so good, Piper…. I know how, I promise. Just… please?”
“Oh my god,” the two of you say in unison.
You so badly want to ask if this is biographical. How Namjoon feels about a little degradation; what he’d do if someone actually called his cock stupid. Ifsomeone has called his cock stupid. You dare a glance at him and conclude that someone’s had to. Namjoon just has that kind of energy.
But you can’t ask because it’d be weird, so you keep reading.
“How do you want me?” she asks softly when their lips part. There’s a wild look in his eyes, like he’s processing all the possible options out of everything he’s considered. And then it occurs to her. “Have you imagined this before? Thought about how you’d fuck me?” she teases him as she stands, stepping into him. Piper pushes one hand through his hair, brushing it back off of his forehead and wraps her other around his dick, squeezing a little for emphasis on her words. “Yes,” he groans as she strokes him, thumbing at the head of his cock. “Tell me what you want, then. Want me on all fours for you? Want me to show you how it’s done, to let you lay back and ride you so you don’t have to put in any work?” Namjoon’s breathing is getting heavy, pupils blown wider with each suggestion. 
“I told you!” you shriek, laughing in between the words. “I told you I’d…” And then your gloating tapers off, because what happens next has your brain malfunctioning.
“All of that,” he whines as she lets go of his hair and brings her hand down to run a fingertip over his perineum. “Want all of that. Want to bend you over the table and fuck you right here. Hear your sounds in the microphone.” Even in her dirtiest thoughts about him, she hadn’t considered the microphone, hadn’t considered recording it. When she thinks about it though, it makes sense. Namjoon is exactly the kind of person that would get off to someone’s voice. So, she does. She makes a show of turning around and slowly bending over the table, sliding her upper body across it carefully until she can reach her microphone and turn it on. When she says into it, “What’re you waiting for?” she sees over her shoulder the way that Namjoon shivers.
This is… not good. You’re never going to be able to look at a microphone the same way, which is extremely not good for a person who supplements their income with a very popular podcast that requires them to speak into a microphone for extended periods of time.
This is very, very bad.
Namjoon must be thinking the same, because he lets out a strangled a-haaa that’s less of a laugh and more a plea to God, the gods, the entire gamut of higher powers that might be able to save him. No one’s going to, you think, staring down at the paper again. This godless piece of fanfiction will be preserved on the internet forever, will be seared into your mind forever, and no amount of praying is going to erase it.
“I should, uh. Just read the rest, yeah? Get it over with?”
“Mhm. Yep. Yes, please.”
Don’t say please, you almost say. You can’t take it; not after what you’ve just read.
So you put on a show. Steel your expression and your nerves and take it seriously. Use voices and sound effects and desperately try to stave off the awkwardness you know is inevitable because a smut fic is probably only going to end one way, and that’s with you acting out Namjoon having an orgasm.
Maybe you’ll have another one, too, if the author is nice.
It’s sweet, she thinks, the way he’s easy for her, takes his time with her. Strokes his fingertips along her sides and kisses the back of her neck reverently. As much as she loves it, part of her hopes he’s not always like this—hopes he’ll give as good as he takes, hopes he’ll put her in her place. She can feel his cock hard against the cleft of her ass, not even inside her yet, and still, she thinks about next time and the time after that. “Still okay?” He breathes into her ear as his tip rubs against her cunt.  “Yeah—want you, Joon.”  “Never thought I’d hear you say those words.”  “I never thought you’d record them,” she teases, eyes glancing up to the flashing light showing the mic picking up all of this as he starts his slow slide into her.  Piper falls even further forward when he bottoms out, letting her forehead rest on the table. He’s whispering filth in her ear, about how he has something to prove, how she’ll never want anyone after this, how no one can fuck her the way he does.  She hates that he’s right.  Each stroke brings a new sensation: sparklers, butterflies, nerve endings on fire as he fucks into her and licks and sucks at her neck, her shoulders, her ear. Piper can’t even think, and this is what people mean when they talk about being fucked stupid, she decides.  It’s perfect.  Every time she thinks she’s getting close again, he changes something: fucks her a little shallower, moves his hips just a little, slows down, speeds up… It’s driving her crazy.  “Come on,” she whines. “I’m so close…” At least she can tell he is, too. No longer able to sustain the dirty talk, he’s breathing heavily, letting out broken moans and sighs of her name. He’s moving rhythmically now, thrusts consistently faster.  “Oh, fuck, Piper,” he groans, “Gonna cum.” One of his hands finds her clit and he rubs careful circles over her, bringing her to her peak along with him, no more teasing.  When she comes, it’s with a loud moan into the studio mic, and that seems to be what tips Namjoon over the edge, too. His hips stutter into hers as he comes, her cunt clenching around him for what feels like forever.
You deserve an award, you think. An Oscar. You didn’t even groan when you had to read the word “cunt,” and that’s a feat in and of itself.
“Is it over?” Namjoon asks, words muffled by the hands covering his face.
“Not quite,” you answer. “There’s some aftercare, and at the end you ask if I’ll piss on you.”
Namjoon gags. “I asked you what—”
“Today’s episode has been brought to you by Stamps-dot-com—”
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HOLY SHIT THE NEW PATREON EPISODE???????? Posted by u/pod-shipper 4 minutes ago NO WAY. NOOOOOOO FUCKING WAY DUDE THERE’S NO FUCKING WAY THEY DID THIS AS AN ACTUAL EPISODE WHAT THE FUCK WHAT HTE FUCK WHAT EHTU FKF DFGLKDG;L (+705) I wasn’t sure if they were messing around before, and I was quite critical of the “shippers,” but now I’m pretty convinced. (+423) ↳ we’ve been telling y’all for YEARS 😤 (+197) ↳ Glad you’ve seen the light, u/RandomAcorn2058! (+5) ↳ ugh. they weren’t messing around before and they aren’t messing around now. do you guys not listen to what they say? namjoon’s been dating, and piper got out of a six-year relationship just over a year ago. if they’ve had something going on for “years” that means they’re both cheaters, and that’s a really shitty thing to assume about them. not to mention it makes the entire point of the podcast moot. (-63) Why do you guys think Jungkook “wasn’t allowed” to be there? (+314) ↳ So they could fuck lmao it’s so obvious (+329) ↳ because it’s awkward af? would you wanna read porn about yourself w all your coworkers in the room? (+2) ↳ the “it’s awkward” excuse is sooooo lame he’s the one who found it and is the one who edited the episode, he’s gonna see it regardless. (+15) ↳ Tbh I’m more curious about how he even found it to begin with? Do they have a throuple thing going on? Like, why was he looking for smut fic about his bosses? (+38)
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You do not get through recording unscathed.
You are very scathed. Perhaps the most scathed a person has ever been.
Jungkook texts the group chat sporadically throughout the week, cracking jokes and making memes at your and Namjoon’s expense which is par for the course and shouldn’t have you off-kilter, but something inside you feels deeply wrong. Feels like someone’s given you devastating news; feels like it used to back in uni when you knew you’d failed an exam and were just waiting to see how badly.
It both helps and doesn’t that the internet is so invested. All the clips Jungkook keeps posting have re-doubled your Patreon numbers, and jumping up a tax bracket never hurt anyone, you included. But all of those jokes and memes largely went unanswered by both you and Namjoon, still too close to the incident to find the humor in it from the other side.
The two of you had sex.
Not literally, of course, but you figure you might as well have with the way you’re feeling. The way you’re avoiding one another. Someone wrote a story about the two of you having sex and you both read it and something about that, days later, feels really fucking unsettling.
In a bad way? You aren’t sure. It’s not like you’re mad or upset or any other synonym. You just feel… off. Itchy from the inside out, and that’s far from the norm in your and Namjoon’s friendship. In all the years you’ve known one another, you’ve never once avoided each other, including the time you’d set him up with a close friend and he showed up 45 minutes late to their date and ghosted after.
(Unsurprisingly, that friendship had not lasted.)
Maybe it’s because Yoongi had always been there as a buffer. You aren’t of the belief that men and women cannot be platonic friends, but being in a years-long committed relationship nixed a lot of awkward interactions and assumptions off the bat. Even Namjoon had known Yoongi first. Had introduced himself to you in your shared 100-level psych course with a, “Hey, you’re Min Yoongi’s girlfriend, right?” because they ran in the same underground circles and Namjoon had idolized him from afar for years.
Pretty fucked up, then, that Yoongi’s off in Los Angeles with his hot new boyfriend and you’re on your couch, Holly at your feet, pointedly ignoring your texts.
“I’m gonna get a cat,” you say to the dog, trying to redirect his attention when he starts chewing on your sock again. Holly doesn’t offer any input, of course, and he’s a lot like his father in that way. “I can’t believe you have a stepfather. You’re a proper child of divorce now, Min Holly.”
There are a pile of unread texts you continue to ignore in lieu of showing Holly pictures of adoptable cats. A few more memes from Jungkook, one from Namjoon’s new phone asking to move the recording date a few days because “something came up at work,” one from the food delivery service you admittedly use too much offering 10% off your next order, and two from Yoongi. This reminded me of you, the first one says beneath a picture of an ice cream cone on the ground, and another one of him holding a water gun that says send me a picture of my son or else.
You eventually reply back with a picture of your middle finger, Holly nothing but a blurred brown blob in the corner of the frame.
That’s how it goes for the better part of a week. Namjoon’s work issue lasts four days. He doesn’t offer an explanation and you don’t ask for one, you just wait for the all-clear text and try to quiet the nerves once you get it.
You’ve never been nervous to see Namjoon before.
The more popular the podcast became, the more money rolled in. The more money that rolled in, the more you could afford nicer things. That meant going from recording in Namjoon’s living room to a bona fide office space. Third floor, an expanse of windows and natural light, thirty-five minute commute by train.
Today, it feels more like thirty-five seconds.
You can hear Jungkook’s witch cackle from the stairwell, and your mind fills in the blanks of Namjoon’s exasperated sigh. It helps, your brain reminding you that you know these people. You know this is Jungkook’s late gym day, so he’ll be in a pair of sweats and a hoodie that drowns his frame. You know that when Namjoon has work issues and feels like an inconvenience, he always shows up with two boxes of baked goods from the bakery near his place, and you know both of them will save the best donut for you.
So you walk in and Jungkook’s in a hoodie and sweats just like you expect him to be, and there are two boxes of baked goods next to the coffee machine. Both of them say hello and wave and, for all intents and purposes, everything is normal.
Except it isn’t.
Because Namjoon looks… different.
Not in a bad way. Not in a bad way. He almost always dresses nicely, always looks polished and put-together, usually because he’s either going to or coming from campus—fitted shirts, either of the tee or dress variety, and earth-toned cardigans; tailored trousers that are sometimes corduroy; polished loafers. Sometimes, if he’s feeling extra casual, a stark white pair of tennis shoes.
Today, he wears none of those things.
No, today torture comes in the form of form-fitting jeans and a t-shirt a little oversized so he can roll the sleeves. His hair is brushed back off his face instead of parted down the middle. He’s wearing gold jewelry that glints in the sun. A pair of off-white Converse high-tops. And, much to your horror, he’s also wearing his glasses.
According to the internet, Kim Namjoon is peak husband material, which you can usually ignore, but not when he’s wearing glasses.
You avert your gaze, convinced you’ll burst into flames if you stare too long, not to mention Jungkook will notice and that’s a ribbing you’d rather die than take. So you avert your gaze and pointedly ignore Namjoon, who’s talking about his work crisis to no one in particular. Something about a co-worker going on an unexpectedly early paternity leave, and Namjoon being asked to cover some of his courses until they could find a more permanent fix.
Jungkook asks a question you don’t catch. Because paternity leave means his co-worker and his partner had a baby, presumably via old-fashioned methods, and it’s not a direct mention of sex but it’s close enough to send you into a coughing fit you have to blame on your donut. Neither of them buy it, but Namjoon is a good enough person to look genuinely concerned. Reaches out, probably to slap your back, but the thought of him touching you is just… too much.
So he barely gets out an, “Are you o—” before you choke down whatever’s left in your mouth and cut him off with a, “Yep, all good!” before you’re scurrying off to the opposite side of the room like a little rat.
It doesn’t get any better.
Both of you are so stilted and awkward during recording that Jungkook has to be the voice of reason and call it, suggest trying again tomorrow. Luckily he has enough b-side stuff he can release if need be, Namjoon’s work emergency providing a decent cover, and he sends the two of you home for the afternoon with all the exasperation and incredulity of a disappointed parent.
Thirty-five minutes back home.
Thirty-five minutes to sit in the embarrassment of not being able to do your job. Thirty-five minutes to catastrophize and wonder what you’re going to do if you can’t get it together. Namjoon will keep the podcast, of course; you’ll be replaced with someone else. Maybe someone less cynical, maybe someone more, but undoubtedly a man. After this mess, you can’t imagine Namjoon would want another female co-host.
But as embarrassed as you are, your traitorous brain keeps thinking about Namjoon.
Thirty-five minutes to think about his glasses and his rolled-up sleeves and the way the denim of his jeans contoured perfectly to his thighs. Thirty-five minutes to think about, “Please let me fuck you,” he begs. Thirty-five minutes to squeeze your thighs together and overanalyze the way he stumbled over his words today; how he could barely make eye contact. Thirty-five minutes to draft a dozen resignation texts and delete them all.
You groan, head thunking against the train window. You’ll take a cold shower as soon as you get home.
That’ll cure you.
You get home and walk Holly so long he gives up halfway through and you have to carry him back to your apartment. You take a cold shower and actually find it pleasant once the initial shock wears off, so it doesn’t work to keep all your rogue Namjoon thoughts at bay. You make a simple dinner and don’t think about Namjoon sitting you on the counter and having his way with you. You tuck yourself into bed far too early and consider going back to therapy, because clearly something very, very bad has happened to your psyche.
Needless to say, nothing cures you.
But it’s a new day, and you’re determined to get your shit together. Yesterday was a fluke, because you’re so normal and so capable of being in the same room as Kim Namjoon.
Except—you’re not.
Jungkook’s there when you arrive, mindlessly scrolling through his phone. Barely looks up at you to say hello, and barely returns it when you do. You double-check the time, because you can count on two fingers the amount of times you’ve shown up and Namjoon wasn’t already there, jotting down extensively-detailed notes, circling and highlighting and chasing down Jungkook to ask questions.
“Where’s Namjoon?”
Jungkook shrugs. “Dunno. Not here.”
You roll your eyes. “Super helpful, thanks.”
Jungkook rolls his eyes right back. “You don’t pay me enough to also be his handler.”
You bite your tongue. Arguing with Jungkook means you’ve already lost the war. Not worth it. But it still eases your worries a bit that he doesn’t know any more than you do. That Namjoon hadn’t only texted him to say why he was running late because he didn’t want to—or couldn’t—talk to you.
So you wait. And you wait and you wait and you wait. Jungkook lets you talk to people on his dating apps and tells you about his new gym routine until your eyes are glazing over. Orders food delivery for the two of you because he gets hungry after an hour and had already eaten what was left of the snacks before you arrived. Cracks a joke that isn’t really a joke about calling the police, because Namjoon still hasn’t shown up and he hasn’t said anything and none of your texts are showing as delivered.
You’re halfway to hour two when the office door bursts open and Namjoon stumbles through, soaked with sweat and stammering over apologies.
“I am so sor—I broke my phone again so my alarm never went off and then I missed my bus? And apparently they’re not running the regular bus schedule today so the next one was a half-hour wait, but then I…”
You don’t catch the rest, because Namjoon is covered in sweat and breathing heavily and a week ago you could’ve survived this. A week ago you would’ve cracked a joke and handed him a towel and told him to get to work. A week ago you would not have been paralyzed in your seat, transfixed on the sweat rolling down the side of his neck.
You are fucked beyond belief.
Jungkook elbows you in the ribs, bringing you back to reality. “...even paying attention?” You startle, face warming in embarrassment. Namjoon still isn’t looking at you. “This is so sad to watch,” Jungkook mumbles, and thankfully it’s only loud enough for you to hear. “Like some stupid shit you only see in nature documentaries.”
Well, you can’t really argue with that, now can you?
But you’re a professional above all, so you hum an acknowledgment and take your regular seat. Pointedly ignore Jungkook. Wait for Namjoon to assume his position as well, and you’re surprised to see the space in front of him empty. No notes. No script. There’s just… nothing.
“Are you okay?” you ask, gesturing to the space in front of him when he seems confused. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you without a stack of notes in front of you.”
“I forgot them.”
“Don’t think I’ve ever seen you do that, either.”
Your tone is light and airy, not at all accusing or confrontational, but Namjoon’s jaw clenches nonetheless. He scoffs, fires a shitty little, “Were you not paying attention when I was talking about what a horrible fucking morning I’ve had?” at you that makes even Jungkook flinch. A few moments of stunned silence, and then, “Oh fuck, I’m so sorry, that was rude—”
“Yeah, it was,” you agree, and all of a sudden you feel too big for your body. Feel like there are ants beneath your skin, feel like everything is wrong, and you don’t want to be here anymore. “It’s fine. Let’s just—”
Namjoon looks like he wants to argue, but he just sighs and says, “I—yeah, okay.”
This is where Namjoon would usually launch into the intro, a dimpled smile already plastered on his face that’d drop as he discussed another failed first date with that brand of self-deprecation that makes him so endearing. This is where he’d say what have you been up to, Pipe, and you’d try not to groan because how hard could it possibly be to add one more letter, another syllable, but Namjoon seems incapable of it. This is the part that, for three years, has been seamless and easy and instinctual, just two friends having a conversation.
There’s a red light on your microphones that indicates you’re recording. It’s on and it mocks you, because Namjoon is not doing the intro or telling you about a failed date. He doesn’t use that cringey nickname. He doesn’t say anything at all. His mouth opens and shuts and no words come out. What’s worse is that you know exactly why he can’t speak, because you’re thinking about it, too.
“So, uh,” you begin, and Jungkook makes a gagging sound from behind you. “Come here often?”
Namjoon ignores you. “Right, right, the intro…” He sucks in a breath. “Welcome back to another episode of Put Him in the Trash, I’m—”
“Joon—”
“Namjoon, and my co-host here is—”
“Joon, that’s not—”
“Piper. Wait, why are you looking at me like that?”
“That’s not the name of our podcast.”
“Huh?”
“You said Put Him in the Trash.” Namjoon just blinks. “It’s Place Him Gently in the Garbage.”
“Is it? Since when?”
“Since forever?”
He looks at Jungkook, who is hiding behind his hands. “Is she right?”
A beat of silence. “I can’t do this,” he half-shouts, half-whines. “Are you two going to be like this forever? Because if you are, I’m quitting. I’m so serious. I’m gonna quit. I can’t take it anymore. The two of you are insufferable.” Another beat of silence, before Jungkook stands at full height and lords over you and Namjoon. “Forget today. Just go home and try again on Monday. This is so—I’m seriously gonna quit.”
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Yoongi comes on Saturday afternoon to pick up Holly.
Yijeong isn’t with him, which is almost disappointing. Now that he’s dating again, you were looking forward to seeing just how awkward it could get with the three of you in the same room, but he looks good. Refreshed. The trip clearly did a world of good for him, and you can’t even bring yourself to crack a joke at his expense.
He, however, has no such hang-ups. “You look like shit.”
“Weird way to say thank you.” You click your tongue and look down at Holly. “Do you see how your father treats me? You should bite him.”
“My son would never. But also, thank you.” He flops onto the sofa. “You do look like shit, though. You wanna talk about it?”
“Not with you, preferably.”
“Oh, gross, is it a dating thing, then?”
“I—no.” You pause. It’s not a dating thing, but you still feel like you’ve got motion sickness whenever you think about it. How would you even begin to explain this to Yoongi, anyway? Someone wrote a porn fic about me and Namjoon. You remember Namjoon, right? Namjoon, that I’ve known and have been friends with since college. Yeah, that Namjoon. Anyway, someone wrote fanfiction about us having sex, and it fucked me up so bad I can no longer be in the same room as him.
No fucking way.
“You look like you’re holding in a fart.”
“You know, I’m getting really sick of you. Did you just come here to insult me?”
He snorts, but his smirk dissipates a few seconds later, a familiar seriousness filling the void. “We’re okay, right? Was the Yijeong thing too soon?”
“No,” you answer immediately, leaning over to flick him on the forehead. “We’re fine, and if you’re happy, then I’m happy for you.” He still looks doubtful. “You want me to start singing ‘I Will Always Love You’ or something? It’s just… weird work stuff.”
“Depends. Are you singing the Dolly Parton or Whitney version? And real work or podcast work?”
“Podcast work, and obviously the Whitney version.”
Yoongi seems surprised by this, eyebrows disappearing beneath his fringe. “Like, the podcast with Namjoon?” He presses his tongue into the fat of his cheek when you nod your head. “Not gonna lie, I didn’t think that was possible.”
“Like I said, it’s weird. It wasn’t, like, an argument or anything.”
“How weird?”
“You’re so fake, Min Yoongi. You act like you’re so distinguished and above drama, but really you’re just as hungry for gossip as the rest of us.”
He shrugs. “I’m not denying it.”
God help you, you’re going to rip off the band-aid. “Someone… Jesus, this is so embarrassing. Someone… wrote? Fanfiction? About us.”
“About you and Namjoon?”
“Yeah.”
“Oh my god—”
“About us… uh. Having sex? Specifically.”
“Oh my god—”
“Jungkook found it and thought it’d be funny if we read it for an episode.”
“Oh my god?”
“So we did? And it was really weird, which I expected, because I’ve known Namjoon for a long time, and I never, ever thought about having sex with him because we were together and me and Namjoon are friends, so yeah, it was fucking weird. But now… I don’t know. I can’t stop thinking about it? And now we can’t even be in the same room as one another.” Yoongi is a concerning shade of red. “So our show is gonna get canceled, because we can only release b-side stuff for so long until people realize something’s up, and it was Namjoon’s podcast to begin with so obviously I’ll get fired—”
“Oh my god, you want to fuck Namjoon.”
Yoongi sounds like a strangled cat when he says this, which does not help the way you feel like you’ve been hit square in the face with a frying pan. “No,” you argue, though it sounds more like a question. You do not want to fuck Namjoon. “No, no. No. It’s just because it was weird.”
“Did you forget I dated you for six years? I know what you look like when you want to fuck someone.”
“You’re telling me you wouldn’t be weird if someone wrote fanfiction about you fucking your friend?”
“Not if I didn’t actually want to fuck them, no.”
“You’re a liar. Get your dog and get out of my apartment.”
Yoongi laughs as he stands. Pats you on the back in the most condescending way you’ve ever had someone pat you on the back. “Let me know how it goes. No need to give me credit for your moment of horny clarity.”
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Min Yoongi is a bastard.
Unfortunately, as you come to find out, he’s also a correct bastard.
You want to fuck Namjoon.
Which is… not great, you have to admit, considering he can barely stand to be around you, so you take another cold shower and decide you’re going to take this to your grave. You’re going to spend the rest of the weekend getting your shit together, and you’re going to show up on Monday and be a consummate professional. You’re going to look at Namjoon and say, ha ha, isn’t it so funny someone thought we would have sex? I don’t think about it at all because I am so cool and normal about it.
You’ve got it all planned out. You’re going to show up fifteen minutes early with your own box of pastries. You’re going to look nice, if not a little pretentious—maybe a nice sweater. You’re going to be prepared with notes of your own. You might even be nice to the villain of the week so Namjoon doesn’t have to pinch the bridge of his nose and sigh at you.
And then someone knocks on your door.
You find Namjoon on the other side, and all your plans immediately go to shit.
Has he always been this tall? You can’t remember. You can’t remember a lot of things, including how to speak, because Yoongi had launched you into a crisis of epic proportions and now here’s the source of it, standing right in front of you. With all of his… height. And thighs. And that heady, musky cologne he always wears, that you can still smell now even though there’s an unfortunate amount of distance between you.
“Uh, hi.”
You blink. “Hi,” you parrot, and it’s a little insulting how one single word seems to have sucked up all of your brainpower. “Namjoon,” you tack on, not awkward at all.
“Sorry to just show up,” he says, scratching at the back of his neck. Very bad idea; makes his biceps bulge. You barely swallow your whimper. “It’s just—my phone’s still broken, and it felt bad leaving things how we did? So I was hoping we could talk.”
Talk. Namjoon wants to talk to you. Normally: not a problem. Currently: big problem. You manage a nod, open the door wider to let him in, and you don’t think about how jarring it is to have Namjoon in your space. You don’t think about how your legs feel like jelly all of a sudden, or what it’d be like if Namjoon bent you over the couch, or the kitchen counter, or the—
You cough. “Do you want anything to drink?”
“Oh, sure. Maybe just some water if you have it.”
If you have it. What kind of person doesn’t have water? But you tell him to make himself comfortable and get him some anyway, and you mull too long over the size of the glass. Ultimately decide on a smaller one, because if things get unbearably awkward you can excuse yourself to the kitchen to get more.
“I haven’t been here in a while,” Namjoon says from the living room, and when you look up he’s sorting through a stack of books near the window. Some he’d lent you months ago, notes jotted in the corners, sticky notes in the shape of sea animals on important pages. “You ever wind up reading this?”
The Idiot. Namjoon had raved about it when he was in the midst of his 19th century Russian phase, right after he’d read a bunch of Tolstoy and Pushkin. You shake your head—though, judging from the title, you wonder if someone hadn’t written your biography.
“It’s good. If you have the time, you should definitely give it a shot.”
“Yeah, of course,” you say, handing over his water. You take a seat in an armchair, pull your knees to your chest. Namjoon’s still looking through your books, isn’t looking at you, so it feels safe to say, “You wanted to talk?”
“Yeah.” He moves to sit on the floor, massive thighs spreading until he’s comfortable. Thank god he can’t see the look on your face. “I just wanted to make sure we’re alright. Things have felt pretty weird since we filmed the, uh.” He coughs. “Thing.”
“Right, yeah.” You realize he’s waiting for an answer, and you offer up a very rushed, “We’re fine, Joon.”
“Are you sure?”
Yeah, you’re sure: sure you absolutely cannot be having this conversation in the safety and sanctity of your own home. It’s tainted now, contaminated by all your uncontrolled horny thoughts about the man in front of you. You’ll have to fumigate. Might have to pick up and move, actually, or call an exorcist.
“I’m sure,” you assure him. “The… thing… was weird, but it’s fine. Temporary.”
“Do you think we shouldn’t have done it?”
That’s the million-dollar question, isn’t it? Because, in isolation, reading a porn fic about yourselves wasn’t a big deal. No one got hurt. Everyone who needed to be consulted was consulted. The episode made the two of you a lot of money, and Jungkook even promised to send some of it to the author, so your bases are beyond covered.
So, should you have done it? There wasn’t a good enough reason not to, because the story itself was never the problem.
The problem is staring you right in the face. It’s sitting on your floor, a book cracked in half at the spine and forgotten in his lap. The problem is looking at you like you hold all the answers to the universe’s secrets, and it’s no small thing to be looked at like that. The problem is that Namjoon is looking at you like that from across the room but you’re wondering what it’d look like from on top of you.
The problem is that you’ve co-hosted a podcast with Namjoon for three years, have known him even longer, and you’ve just realized today that you want to have sex with him.
And you can’t say that, can you, because Namjoon came here to fix things which really does not lend itself to a hookup. Namjoon cares about your friendship and your working relationship so much he came here to try and salvage it, so you’re going to keep your mouth shut. You’re going to say, “I think it’s okay that we did,” and leave it at that. Because it is okay.
Because you’re the problem.
It feels like a small victory when Namjoon sags in relief. When he exhales and says, “Okay, good, because I think so, too.”
“It made us a lot of money,” you tack on.
Namjoon’s eyes widen as he laughs. “Right? Like, that was almost too much money. Just to watch us read porn?”
“About ourselves. I think that was the selling point.”
He stands. You do, too. “Never thought I’d be doing that,” he says, returning the book to where it belongs. “Definitely the most embarrassing thing I’ve done for money.”
“Being a man with a podcast wasn’t embarrassing enough?”
He snorts. Gets closer to the door. “Hey now.” You’re going to survive this. “Thanks for entertaining me, by the way. For a second there I was really worried we’d fucked it all up.”
Just the ending. Just one more thing to say and you’ll be done with this, and then you can take your third cold shower in recent memory and triple text Yoongi with a full-fledged mental breakdown. Maybe he’ll bring Holly back and you can register him as your emotional support animal.
And Namjoon must sense the awkwardness that’s crept back in, because he tries to cover it with a joke. Says, “Haaa, like you’d actually piss on me, right?”
Except it sounds like he’s got a mouth full of marbles.
It’s no wonder you mishear him.
Because he says like you’d actually piss on me but you hear like you’d actually kiss me, and there isn’t a universe that exists in which the following makes sense: you, stunned into silence in the doorframe, Namjoon saying his goodbyes, you thinking fuck it, last chance and saying, “Yeah, I’d kiss you.”
Namjoon stops dead in his tracks. “What?”
Your entire body is on fire. “Is, uh. Is that not what you said?”
“I don’t think it matters anymore what I said.”
“I’d argue that it does, for the sake of my digni—”
“You’d kiss me?” Namjoon… doesn’t look put off of the idea, which is surely a point in your favor. Interesting to note that his diction is crystal clear, now. Bastard. “You’d kiss me right now?”
There’s also no explanation for the way you say: “It’s only been an option for ten seconds and you’re already begging for it?”
You’d say there’s no explanation for the way Namjoon’s jaw clenches, the way he repeats I don’t beg for anything, but maybe the simple fact is: the two of you want to fuck each other. And, judging from the way Namjoon crowds your space, keeps dropping his gaze to your mouth, it seems very likely to happen.
All that fixating you’d done on Namjoon’s thighs was wasted, you think, as you take in the shape of his mouth. His lips. The way his tongue darts out to run along the bottom at the last second before he reaches out, tilts your head up, and finally presses his mouth to yours.
And you’ve got to laugh, because no piece of written fiction could ever accurately portray what it feels like. How soft his lips are. The way he touches you—gentle, but still dominant enough to have you moving the way he wants, have you backing up into your apartment so he can smile against your mouth as he closes the door behind him.
No piece of fiction would get it right, the way you’re unsteady on your feet, breathless at the way Namjoon’s kissing you. How he only breaks apart long enough to ask where do you want me in that throaty, deep voice of his. How you’re so overwhelmed you can’t decide: unsure if you want to waste the time it’d take to get to your bedroom, but if it’s only going to happen once, wanting to make it count.
So you decide to risk it. Plant your hands in the middle of his exceptionally broad chest and push him in the direction of the hallway, and if the two of you can’t wait, can’t control yourselves, well.
But the story had gotten one thing right: Namjoon does kiss like a branding iron, hot and greedy. Namjoon kisses you like there’s nothing else he wants to do in this lifetime, and it makes you dizzy. Has you off-kilter, stumbling into the wall as you try to remember where the fuck your bedroom is and why it’s so far. Just like the fictional version of you, you also moan when he licks into your mouth.
“Should I do it the way we did in the fic?” Namjoon asks as the two of you cross the threshold into your bedroom, a cheeky grin on his face. “Do it like this?” he questions, pushing you gently until you’re on the back in the middle of your bed, chest heaving as you lift your head to look at him.
Namjoon is so, so big from where you lay, just hovering at the foot of your bed. Cheeks ruddy, bulge prominent. “What’d you say you wanted?”
Takes a second to remember how to breathe, let alone what you’d read. What do you want, Namjoon had asked, right before he’d sank to his knees in front of you. “Whatever you’re willing to give,” you answer.
Namjoon smiles. Puts one knee on the bed, and the way it dips beneath his weight is unsettling. Why does he have to be so fucking large. “That’s right, baby.” Christ, you think, because there’s another thing that fic had gotten right. No one on earth would be immune to Namjoon calling them baby in that tone of voice.
The riposte biting at the back of your teeth gets swallowed whole as Namjoon grabs your ankles and drags you to the edge of the bed. “May I?” he asks, hands poised above the waistline of your leggings. You nod, and Namjoon drags down your underwear with them. “Fuck, look at you,” he groans, awe creeping into the edge of his words.
“You want me to do it the same way? Hm? You’re being awfully quiet; thought you were giving me shit about being the one in charge,” he chides.
Because you’re short-circuiting. Namjoon’s on his knees, just like you’d envisioned, and his mouth is dangerously close to your cunt. How can you be expected to think and speak under these conditions? But if Namjoon can find the brainpower to be a bastard, so can you, because what you’d read and the way he’d reacted can both never be forgotten. So you thread your hands into his hair and pull. The resulting moan is enough to sustain you for years.
“Are you gonna keep running your mouth, or are you gonna make me come on it?”
He blinks. “Jesus Christ.”
There’s precedent. Fictional Namjoon ate you out like a man starved, like he couldn’t get enough. Had fictional you writhing and insatiable, so it’s a lot to live up to, but it doesn’t deter him in the slightest. He hesitates for only a second, giving you one last chance to back out before the two of you set every last boundary on fire, and then he’s settling between your thighs and making you see stars.
Now you know what it’s like. Now you don’t have to rely on fiction, and it doesn’t matter because it’d never compare to the way Namjoon feels as he works to bring you to your ruin. The way he flattens his tongue to lick long, thick stripes; the way his lips suction around your clit. The way it feels when he groans against your core. The way he says, “Fuck, you do taste good,” like that’s a completely normal thing to say. Like he doesn’t know exactly what he’s doing to you.
But you need more and Namjoon knows it. His mouth doesn’t leave your cunt for a second, but his fingers find your mouth, so you put on a show. Wrap your lips around them, suck on them the way he’s doing to you, make sure they’re slick. Namjoon groans again, doubles his efforts. Slides one thick finger inside of you and barely lets you adjust before he’s adding a second.
In an embarrassingly short amount of time, Namjoon has you unraveling. Presses incessantly on a spot that has your vision whiting out. Has you trembling, a little panicked as you say, “Joon, fuck—Namjoon, wait—” as it builds and builds and builds.
You might black out for a second, because you come to and Namjoon looks… stunned. He looks like he can’t believe any of what just happened, and you blink a few times, try to come back into your body, and when you regain enough consciousness, you’re extremely aware of the large wet patch beneath you.
“Um—”
“Holy shit.”
“Namjoon, that’s not—that’s embarrassing—can you grab a—”
He shuts you up with a kiss. Presses the taste of you into your skin, and all those silly protests die in your throat, because if Namjoon was needy before, he’s desperate now. Covers your body with his own, hips dipping down low enough to press his erection into the juncture of your thigh, and the weight of him is delicious. Has you fisting the fabric of his t-shirt to pull him closer, has you pulling it over his head, his pants following. Has your hands skimming down every thick part of his body until you reach his cock, hard and aching and slick with pre-cum.
“I need to suck you off later,” you say, done with overthinking. Time to just be honest, and Kim Namjoon has a dick you need to feel down your throat. “Remind me.”
He whines, thrusts into your hand a little harder. “How could I forget that?”
“Don’t know. Didn’t know if this would be the only time,” you answer. “Did you bring a condom?” Namjoon nods, fetches one from his wallet and rolls it on.
He hovers above you again. Looks nervous, all of a sudden, like he can’t tell his lefts from his rights. All out of sorts. You’re about to tell him it’s fine, you don’t have to do anything he doesn’t want to, don’t have to do anything at all, when he says, “It doesn’t have to be.” You just stare. “The only time.”
There’s a conversation to be had. You know that. Both of you clearly have feelings you need to talk about and sort out, but you reckon they can wait. They’ll still be there in the afterglow, in the morning. So you nod, say okay, Joon, and kiss away the insecurities that still linger.
You think about the fic. Think maybe Namjoon would appreciate it if you cracked a stupid joke, just like he’d tried to do earlier. “Has anyone ever called your cock stupid?”
He laughs, breath fanning against your skin. “No. Wanna try it and see what happens?”
Might as well. You try to remember the exaggerated tone of voice you’d used. Repeat the line—“Do you even know what to do with that big, stupid cock?”—and wait.
There’s a beat of silence, and then—
Namjoon swallows thickly. “I, um. Unfortunately, I think that really works for me.” You laugh. Pull him closer. Wrap your legs around his waist as he starts to move against you. Has jokes of his own. “Please. Please let me fuck you.”
You roll your eyes, laugh tapering into a giggle. “Do you know how?” Namjoon nods, looking all too much like a puppy eager to please its owner. “Do you promise?” He nods again. “Okay. Okay, come here.”
You expect him to move fast; expect the first time to be frenzied and a little awkward. It isn’t. Namjoon lines himself up and pushes the smallest bit inside, and then he’s leaning down to kiss you. Threads your fingers together, squeezes your hand. Pushes further inside and mumbles praise just beneath your ear.
It’s dizzying, the amount of care Namjoon handles you with. How soft he is. Does nothing to ease the discomfort of the stretch, the overwhelming fullness, but he talks you through it. Tells you how good you feel, how beautiful you look. Spills a lot of words you’d probably be embarrassed to hear and he’d be embarrassed to say if this was any other time, but in the heat of the moment it all just works to unravel you faster.
He bottoms out. “Okay?” he asks, and you’re rewarded with a dimpled smile when you say you are. Namjoon is a devastating kind of beautiful.
But, as he gives you time to adjust and you give him the all-clear, he also fucks like a demon. What once was hand-holding is now your wrists pinned to the bed, your body caged beneath him as he rolls his hips at a pace that has your eyes rolling back into your head. You’ve been deceived. Lured into a false sense of security.
It’s almost a shame this isn’t being recorded, because you want to memorize all the sounds Namjoon’s making. Want to hear them for the rest of your life. Don’t want anyone else to be the reason he sounds like this, and as he ups his pace and presses his lips to your neck, you don’t want to sound like this because of anyone else, either.
Maybe one of those times in the future, you can talk him into it.
Namjoon reaches down, rubs circles into your clit. Every time you think you might be close, he pulls his hand away, smiles like the devil. You let him have his fun for a while, let him think you’re keen to lie back and take it, and then you tighten your legs around his waist and flip him onto his back.
He doesn’t think it’s very funny. Looks up at you all bewildered. “What’re you—”
“You were taking too long,” you snark. “Figured I’d take matters into my own hands.”
“Yeah? Shit,” he says as you begin to move. “Fuck, baby, like that. Ride me just like that.”
You do. Don’t change a thing, because Namjoon’s cock is long and thick enough to hit exactly where you need it to. You can feel yourself clenching, feel yourself getting wetter, and the sight of Namjoon beneath you does nothing to stave off the inevitable. He looks even better than you’d imagined: skin flushed, eyes squeezed shut, head thrown back, sweat-slick. You want to make him cry. Want to give him the entire world. You will.
Namjoon thrusts at the same time you roll your hips, and that’s what does it. Has you crying out, has stars flashing behind your eyelids. Has you saying fuck, fuck, fuck as he drives you over the edge for the second time. Has you on the brink of oversensitive as he thrusts a few more times to chase his own end, almost delirious at the way Namjoon moans as he spills into the condom.
Has you swooning, just a bit, at the dopey way Namjoon smiles at you, eyes half-lidded and crinkled at the corners.
“Was that okay?”
You snort. “Yeah, I’d say it was decent.”
“Maybe next time you could pee on me,” he jokes.
You whack him on the chest. “Sure. Or we could record it.”
Has you a little shocked at the way his cock twitches inside of you at the mention of it.
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On Monday, you don’t wear a pretentious sweater.
When you stroll in, Jungkook’s already got the best donut shoved halfway into his mouth because he’s a shithead. He eyes you warily, probably hoping with all his hope that you spent the weekend finding God and getting your shit together.
And then he realizes you’ve got on Namjoon’s hoodie and he nearly chokes to death.
“What the fuck are you wearing—”
Namjoon appears at that very moment, and it’s so hard not to take credit for the way he’s glowing, the dazed smile on his face. But Jungkook notices, because Jungkook notices everything, and his gaze darts between the two of you: your hoodie, Namjoon’s face, your face. He opens his mouth, something inappropriate bound to spill out, but Namjoon beats him to the punch. “Ready?” he asks you, and you nod.
It’s seamless.
No hiccups, no awkward stuttering. Namjoon gets through the intro without a hitch, and it feels exactly like it used to. Just two friends having a conversation. It’s obvious Jungkook still wants to say something, but after suffering through last week, he stays quiet lest he makes it worse and sends the two of you back to the bad place.
“How was your weekend, Pipe? Do anything fun?” Namjoon rolls his lips, tries not to laugh.
So you play along. “No, not really, just some dog sitting. How about you?”
“Oh, you know me. Had another first date on Saturday.”
“Did you? How’d it go?”
“Perfect.”
It’s a blessing Jungkook isn’t filming this, because your eyebrows raise so far they nearly disappear from your face altogether. There isn’t even a hint of hesitation in Namjoon’s voice, and although you would’ve described it the same way, hearing him say it with such conviction has you a little stunned. “Wow. You gonna see her again?”
“Yeah,” Namjoon says, sharing a private smile with you. “I think I am.”
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who the FUCK is namjoon dating Posted by u/pod-shipper 7 minutes ago This has honestly ruined my entire day. I thought all the stories he told about dating were a bit… Like, what kind of guy has a podcast about relationships but can’t seem to be in one? But you could just HEAR it in his voice how much he likes this woman he went on a date with over the weekend and I’m sick to my stomach. (+2195) ↳ bro you and me both 😭 i genuinely thought him and piper had something going on fr (+1302) ↳ Seriously might stop listening because of this! Any woman with self-respect would never let their partner host a podcast with someone they’re obviously in love with. If he gets serious with this woman, Piper will be gone within 6 months, mark my words. (+927) ↳ I wouldn’t worry about it too much! My cousin works at a really nice restaurant in the same city Namjoon lives in, and she said she saw this “date” on Saturday and that it wasn’t anything serious. (+788) ↳ Piper got a cat and Namjoon finally got a second date. Face it, it’s over. (+325) ↳ cannot believe him and piper aren’t dating.. do you think i should delete all my tiktok edits? (+4) ↳ this is unhinged lmfao i thought y’all hated piper? you’re in here bitching abt her being a “misandrist” every week and now ur gonna stop listening bc namjoon isn’t dating her? pick a lane and stay in it (-64)
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Thank you so much for reading! I'd love to hear your thoughts, and reblogs/shares are always welcome! I appreciate you very much~ ♡
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iceunhie · 8 months
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voicelines about you: as their lover !
featuring: imbibitor lunae, jing yuan, gepard. (+ jingliu and kafka)
notes: headcanons! some might be ooc HELP. i couldn't resist writing for hsr man… also jingliu and kafka sneak bc mmm i love morally questionable women 🤩. gn!reader. reader is not trailblazer. some fluff, some angst (?) kinda. reblogs are very much appreciated!
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Imbibitor Lunae (Danheng IL)
About [Name]: They're one of the few people who's never condemned me for Danfeng's sins, nor ever tried to get me to own up to them. Their presence is very comforting to me. My lover? *coughs* Y-yes, they are.
About [Name]: Selfies Aside from March, [Name] always seems to ask me to take photos with their camera. Hm? No, I don't really mind. If it makes them feel happy, then that's enough reason for me to agree.
About [Name]: Photo Albums [Name] made an Express photo album with March yesterday. Yeah, pictures of our adventures and memories, according to them. It's in the Data Bank, so just ask me if you want to take a look at it.
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Gepard Landau
About [Name]: [Name] is the most amazing individual I've met. Their determination and their will to pursue their goals to the fullest… I'm proud to call them my lover. Oh, ah… Was that too forward?
About [Name]: Lending a Hand Oftentimes, Serval asks [Name] to help her carry some things for her workshop. Although the times I get to personally help out are rare due to my duties, I still make it a point to support them by asking the Silvermane Guards to keep an eye out for them and help carry my sister's things for them if it's too heavy. Of course. They're always my top priority.
About Serval: Nagging Every time Serval stops by my post, it usually means [Name]'s run into some difficulties, which I try to help them out in. While her telling me about my lover's state is greatly appreciated, she always nags and teases me being a fool for them and… *sigh* No, it's alright, really. I'm thankful that my sister cares about [Name] and goes out of her way to talk to them for me. Still, I do hope her nagging would decrease next time.
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Jing Yuan
About [Name]: Hm? [Name]? Yes, they're indeed my lover. Hehe, now that you've brought them up, I should go look for them. I'm afraid I've grown so used to the feeling of laying my head on their lap that no other pillow can suffice. Ah, what a predicament…
About [Name]: Spending Time Together While I do enjoy dozing off, [Name] makes a point to let me rest at a more appropriate place, instead of at the Seat of The Divine Foresight, buried under a mountain of paperwork. Oftentimes, I do as they say, but when I'm not and just craving their presence… Heh, now that's another matter entirely.
(BONUS! - Yanqing's Voiceline) About [Name]: Oh, [Name]? They always give me some extra allowance for buying swords, buying me sweets and food I like… Of course I won't say no to that! Sometimes, them being with me when I'm being scolded by the General for my expenses helps a lot. Probably because they're the only one the General can't say no to.
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Jingliu
About [Name]: ….Do you really think you have the right to know about them? This is a warning. Try to ask again and perhaps you'll be faced with the end of my blade as my answer.
About [Name]: Soothed The whispers of the marastruck, succumbing to the Abundance… They are the only one able to calm the storm of my thoughts. For that, I am grateful for their patience and their kindness.
(BONUS 2! - Jing Yuan's Voiceline) About Name: While Master's current state is one of irreparable damage, at the very least… She has someone to hold onto while she grapples with the curse of mara. Even if I don't quite believe she's the Jingliu I knew from before, I know that her feelings for [Name] are sincere. I just hope she doesn't end up hurting them in the process.
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Kafka
About [Name]: Aha, now thats a question I didn't expect to hear from you. My lover? Yes, [Name] is that to me. I very much enjoy their love and affection, you know. Even if it isn't on the script, I'd still mention them. Quite romantic of me, no?
About [Name]: Trophy They always, always chide me about me ruining my velvet coats when we finish up a script. What's wrong with a little blood? I keep most of them as trophies. There's one I'm especially fond of, too. They think it's rather embarassing that I keep the coat from the time they got injured on the job. Although the stains have long since turnt black, there's still a faint scent of iron in it. Hm? What do I mean by that? Heh, let's just say I don't take any harm coming to [Name] lightly. While they call it a reminder of their lack of caution, I'd rather call it a little show of my affection~
About [Name]: Destiny's Course Elio refused to tell me about what my future with them would be, saying that the path in that choice is quite difficult to discern, and I think it's for the best. I suppose if [Name] decided to leave the Stellaron Hunters, hm, would locking them up till they can't leave me anymore suffice….? Haha, just kidding. I wouldn't let them leave in the first place.
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© 𝐌𝐇𝐈𝐈𝐄𝐄𝐄 : do not repost, copy, or plagiarize my work.
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vivwritesfics · 2 months
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hi, could you please write something about lando's gf being into magnet collecting and she always buys magnets whenever she goes somewhere new but she can't join lando for a bunch of races and she's sad that she won't be able to buy magnets so he surprises her with magnets of those locations?
Yk what I like collecting? Mugs - I have more mugs than drinking glasses atm (and they're all fun)- i also accidentally took this in a different direction, sorry love
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Lando knew what he had to do every time he went to a Grand Prix without her. It started two years ago, when they first started dating. He took her to her first Grand Prix, showed her around the city.
She loved it, dragged Lando into one of those novelty shops that sold bracelets, dick shaped bottle openers and, most importantly, fridge magnets.
That was what she bought. A fridge magnet. Lando wanted to buy it for her, but it was too early in the relationship and she didn't feel entirely comfortable with him paying for everything for her.
The next Grand Prix she went to, she bought another fridge magnets. She'd missed out on a few, and Lando hadn't yet gotten the memo that she wanted magnets.
Even after that one, he still didn't realise that she wanted fridge magnets. It was on her third Grand Prix attendance that Lando finally clocked it. Actually it was after. It was when he was at her apartment, looking through her fridge for a snack.
When he shut the fridge, he saw the magnets. The magnet from Spain, from her first Grand Prix attendance, a magnet from Hungary and a magnet from Zandvoort. Beneath every magnet was a picture of the two of them, one from each Grand Prix.
At the next Grand Prix he went to without her, he bought her a magnet. It was from Texas, with a silhouette of a cowboy on it. The next time he visited her apartment, she had printed out a selfie he had sent her from the Grand Prix and stuck it beneath the fridge magnet.
At every Grand Prix he went to, Lando bought her a fridge magnet. It didn't matter if she was with him or not, he bought her a magnet. Every magnet went onto her fridge, each of them with a picture of the both of them or just Lando at a Grand Prix stuck beneath them.
The ones that had a picture of just Lando, she promised to herself that it would one day be swapped for a picture of the two of them at that Grand Prix.
There came a point where there were too many fridge magnets. She didn't have enough space for both the pictures and the magnets. So, the pictures went into a photo album. As much as she loved the magnets, that photo album became her prized possession. Pictures of Lando smiling with his arms around her, pictures for just them.
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doyunhos · 1 year
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someone take the enhypen albums out of target this isn’t a joke anymore 😭
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hoony2k · 4 months
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WE DATING FR?
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How could they react around idol!you when no one knows about the relationship.
PAIRING: OT7
GENRE: fluff, crack
WARNINGS: none
NOTE: did not dust not rennovate this (crying emoji) dw i am writing new work. Will be posted soon. Thank you for your patience and support!
Part 2
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★ HEESEUNG:
he's driving everyone insane. Keeps dropping subtle hints that no viewer catches but his manager eyes him like a hawk on award shows and lives. If you're a few feet away from him, he'll glance at you or turn his head in your direction and pretend he's looking at something/one over there. When your eyes meet in the crowd, he winks at you, expression smug. Then turns around with a blank face as if you're not knawing at your lips to not let a bright smile out. There are cameras recording? Okay and? He might not be able to show you off but he's not going to act like you're a stranger.
★ JAY:
very chill about it. Actually he's not. He finds himself in an internal delimma every time you're at shows. Keeps chanting don't look over and over again. Values his career and yours and doesn't want to do anything stupid. He knows how fans are so instead he tries to be sneaky about it. Buys you a bracelet and tells you to wear it when you're at the airport. You don't think too deeply, heart fluttering at the loving gift. A few days later, he uploads a selfie, peace sign on display as well as an identical bracelet snug around his wrist. Some people are speculating but it's nothing big enough for the companies to intervene. Laughs when you call him and says it was a complete coincidence.
★ JAKE:
pda? Baby you do not exist. You are a hallucination. Its a jarring contrast to what hes really like when it's just you because he will NOT make eye contact. He'll stand "near" you not next to you. He knows how vile people on the internet can be and idols get enough of that already. He doesn't want to put you in a compromising position but it's so painful to pretend that nothing is happening between you two. So, he'll do small gestures like during award shows, he'll tell jungwon to hand over his own cushion/blanket to you or your group leader. Be more platonic or "caring" about it so it doesn't seem unusual in the public eye. Sends a bouquet to your makeup rooms and signs the note from enhypen. He's great at fooling.
★ SUNGHOON:
he's actually so ecstatic about it. He would pray and pray to get you as a co-mc, then he'd be able to spend more time and come on camera without any nasty rumours. Plus certain scripts have cheesy pickup lines he'd abuse just to get a reaction out of you. His small smile as he soaks in your flustered reaction? Yea thats def not part of the script. Enjoys that most people ship you because of the ""chemistry"". Giggles on call while he sends you tabloid links that talk about you two. The last nail in the coffin is when he practically describes you as his ideal type. He doesn't know if it sliped out or if it was intsntional. They need to pay the manager more.
★ SUNOO:
the guy who openly calls you his friend. He's the type to introduce a 'slow burn' to ease the public. His fans are used to seeing him talk about you and your group, he doesn't overdo it. Sometimes you talk about him and his group. If a comment asks him to talk about a favourite member in your group he will ignore that, and pretend he never read it because your name would slip out. Defends you in subtle ways by making off-handed comments such as "idols can have off days" or "people shouldn't comment on someone else's appearance. It's not right". Fans make those platonic edits and photoshop you two together in pictures. You bite your fist every time he sends them to you, giggling at how people want to see a collab. That would be his dream. He's def at your concert.
★ JUNGWON:
He's a leader, he's got a lot on his plate but he's also great at controlling himself. people won't suspect a thing when he stands next to you because he stands like 🚹. No fun edits because people can't even tell that you know him, let alone date him. He makes up for it with his love language. Eventually, he'll relax for a bit when he's assured that no one is waiting to get him and his love. He can never be too careful which is why when he can't "do" things publically to help you, he would warn you about certain people/situations. In award shows, if his eyes wander away from his members it's to see if you're safe and comfortable. Once his fears are calmed, he can relax and enjoy the show. Stares at you when he thinks no one is looking.
★ NIKI:
He's just here to have a good time. He prays and wishes for collabs and gets sad whenever nothing happens. He's the type to send you small trinkets as gifts…like an inside joke except there's no joke and Niki feels giddy when he sees your selfie and a familiar charm tied in your phone case. At shows or encore stages, he'll stand behind you (pretends he's doing that because he's soo tall he blocks everyone) and keeps poking you and you have to maintain your expression. Other idols around you know something is up but they don't know what is. He's treading the line between platonic and romantic love. Does the classic rizz move -> notices confetti stuck in your hair and plucks it out, then bows in and greets you casually as if your face isn't red.
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Thank you sm for reading! Hope you enjoyed!
All rights belong to me. Please do not copy/translate/edit.
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seuonji · 7 months
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彡 things they left with you before leaving for tour.
notes ๑ gift giving! headcanons. reader and svt member does not live together!
genre ๑ fluff
warnings ๑ none
word count ๑ 1k
from aya: please reblog if you enjoyed! feedback is always appreciated<3
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seungcheol left you the key to his home.
you’re free to go there whenever you want but he mainly gave it so that you have access to his closet!! it’s also to allow you to see kkuma.
whenever you’re there you always send him a selfie to show how the house is doing. he especially loves the photos that contains you and kkuma on his bed.
yn: [photo attachment]
yn: i changed kkuma’s hairpin today, doesn’t she look cute?
cheol: you both look adorable♡
+
jeonghan left you tons of his oversized shirts.
tons as in it could probably last you until he comes back. but he leaves the ones that hold some type of meaning.
he’d totally give you a whole presentation while unpacking the clothes on why he’s giving it to you.
he left you the shirt that he wore on your first date. he left you another shirt that you complimented. another one he left was one that you described as, ‘looks very comfortable.’ another was in your favourite colour while another was in your least favourite colour,, he asked you to send him photos of you specifically in that one.
he gave them with the intention that though he’s not there, you won’t feel alone at night.
he loves it when he calls and sees you wearing them!
+
joshua left you countless of letters he wrote.
just in case he’s not on his phone enough, to keep his presence with you, he wrote different letters. one for you to read when you’re sad, one for when you felt doubtful, another for when you felt scared.
he wrote letters for any feeling you may feel while he’s gone whether it was sorrow, anger or joy.
one day you were missing him, a lot. so you opened the letter that had ‘read when you feel alone.’ written on it.
‘yn, you’re feeling alone? cause im not there, right( ˊ̱uˋ̱ )?‘ he joked with you even through writing. ‘i know it’s a long wait but i’ll be back soon and we’ll be in bed watching movies together. i’m always thinking about you. i may not be one call away because…what if i’m on stage? but you’re still my number one priority, i hope you know that.’
it’s just long texts of reassurance that he loves you and suggestions of things you can do while you wait for him and honestly, as you read the letters, the more it felt like he was actually there.
+
jun left you a polaroid.
he aswell provided the films but the films were the same amount as the number of days he’d be gone.
he asked you take a picture of something everyday whether it was the scenery or something you were doing. you could either label them or keep it in a photo card binder. he wants you to talk about it with him when he comes back.
total plus if you like journaling/photography!!
+
soonyoung left you a heart locket necklace.
it had funny pictures of you and him on one side and the other side had a picture of you two cuddling.
he has a matching one of course! his one has so many scratches because of how much he kept opening it.
notably, he left you a cute tiger plush that was almost your size.
“think of him as if he’s me.”
“that’s weird youngie…”
idk why but initially i imagined he’d leave you a body pillow with him printed on it.
+
wonwoo left you his console so that you can help him keep up with his games. just kidding.
if you like reading, he definitely leaves you some books he’s collected over the years. he’d even buy books that are of your taste if his isn’t your style. he gave it so that you’d have something to preoccupy your time.
if you aren’t too into reading, he left you things that supports the hobbies you do. if you like art, he buys you paint, if you like knitting he’d buy you yarn. he finds joy in your passion.
+
jihoon left you a usb filled with movies and shows on it. he even provided snacks!
he loved hearing your opinions about shows/movies he liked. since you two were going to be apart, he thought you’d have more time to watch them.
when you did watch the said movie/show, he’d instantly call and listen to your opinions intently. he might end up falling for you all over again! but also it could end up in an endless banter—
“what did you think of that character?“ he asked excitedly but there was a touch of tiredness in his voice.
“they were okay,” you casually answered.
“just okay!?” suddenly the tiredness was gone.
“i said what i said!”
+
seokmin left you a jar filled with origami hearts, cranes, airplanes, stars and even some of your favourite animals.
as you unfold them, there’s small messages written in them. it had messages of affirmations to song/food/movie recommendations.
he looks forward to your response to the letter you opened that day.
“the one i opened today was a good one,” you said smiling.
“really, what’s wrong with the other ones? why aren’t they as good?” he asked in a whining tone.
“the one i opened yesterday said ‘listen to aju nice by seventeen.’” you recalled monotonously.
“what’s wrong with that?”
“anyways the one i opened today said to ‘eat pizza while thinking about me.’” you brushed off the previous topic.
“ah, that’s a good one, even i’m jealous.”
“you wrote it?”
“still, why would you have pizza without me…”
also, he made tons of it lasted even until he came back.
+
mingyu left you a cookbook of things he usually cooks for you.
the first few pages were your favourite meals hes cooked for you. they’re key parts are highlighted in your favourite colours and he even places in affirmations in free spaces. the middle pages are random meals you don’t necessarily like but,, he needed to fill in the pages. the last few pages are your favourite deserts!
+
minghao left you the experience of having permanent bracelets with someone.
he brought you to the store and you got a bracelet in his in his favourite colour as he got one with yours. you both spent hours just admiring the way it shined and he couldn’t stop taking pictures of it.
“now, no matter the distance, you’ll still have a piece of me that’s always with you,” he said.
+
seungkwan left you a self care pack.
there was skincare products, your favourite snacks and cds of your favourite films. they were each labelled with tags of why he gave those specific items.
‘you’ve always liked these, enjoy them.’ labelled on the snacks.
‘please use this, take care of your skin okay?’ labelled on the skincare.
‘don’t get too bored just cause im not there.” labelled on the cds
it’s as if he was taking care of you without because there.
+
vernon left you a pet fish (?)
questionable but at least you’re not completely alone. also he got consent before he bought it so, it was okay. but he also left you some of his jackets and beanies but if it was summer he’d leave you baseball caps. yknow, the sensible gifts.
it’s the thought that counts!
whenever he gets the time he’d call you to check on the fish.
and you as well, of course.
+
chan left you a box full of snacks.
he’s bringing the same snacks with him in his bag. he plans to call you every night so you two can talk about your day while eating the same snacks so that it seems like you two are together.
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hannieehaee · 5 months
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18+ / mdi
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content: bf!jeonghan x reader, bf'sbestfriend!joshua, established relationship, one sided crush, teasing, jeonghan's a lil shit, smut, mentions of oral (m receiving), vouyerism (kinda), etc.
wc: 609
a/n: i thought abt this concept for a while hehe lmk if u would like a lil drabble about this
masterlist
boyfriend!jeonghan who has been aware of joshua's crush on his pretty girlfriend for a while, never really minding it but also being unable to leave that piece of information alone.
jeonghan discreetly teasing joshua about his crush on you by constantly gushing about you in his presence.
from showing him the pretty selfies you send him to going even further by 'accidentally' swiping one too many times and allowing him a glimpse of some of the more risqué pictures you've sent him on lonely nights.
joshua who is usually hard for fluster being caught off guard every single time, always gulping at the sight or mention of anything above pg13 when it came to you.
jeonghan letting you in on his friend's crush and even inciting you to participate in his teasing.
your boyfriend insisting you spontaneously join in any time he hung out with joshua one on one, making joshua a third wheel (but not really).
insisting on taking pictures of you and joshua together under the fake vice of wanting to have a whole collection of pictures of his girlfriend and his best friend together because what could be better than his two favorite people in the same frame ??
leaving the two of you alone for extended periods of time just to imagine his friend's flustered state at being alone with you.
inviting you on tour with them, with you having to share a room with the two of them whenever the members were assigned roommates.
playing around with you at night, supposedly waiting until joshua fell asleep but being fully aware that he could hear your muffled gasps as he took care of you only one bed away from his.
insisting you join the boys at the pool, smirking at his best friend's widened eyes upon seeing you in a tiny swimsuit.
jeonghan consistently getting off on knowing how badly his friend wanted you but couldnt have you.
buying you and joshua matching things such as sweatshirts and phone cases, claiming he also got some for himself but conveniently 'forgetting' them, making it seem like you and joshua were the matching couple.
chuckling to himself whenever you'd take a page from his book and flirt with joshua just to get a reaction out of him.
catching joshua watching you suck him off one night, having pretended to be asleep and closing his eyes right back the moment he made eye contact with jeonghan.
jeonghan smirking at him regardless, playing up his moans for you now knowing for sure he'd been awake every single time.
both joshua and jeonghan being aware of what was happening, with you blissfully unaware as you sucked your boyfriend to completion.
jeonghan cumming harder than ever before, but doing nothing about the situation, simply choosing to shoot his friend a wink before pulling your unaware self into his arms for some sleep.
jeonghan's teasing amping up even more from then on, making you sit on joshua's lap whenever there was no more sitting space, claiming joshuji wouldnt mind.
getting all three of you to hold hands in crowded places, with you in the middle as jeonghan insisted that it was so you wouldnt get separated.
going as far as having the three of you cuddle on the couch as you watched a movie, removing himself from the middle at some point and somehow managing to get the two of you pressed against each other.
jeonghan beginning to realize how much gratification he'd get from seeing you and joshua together, knowing this type of contact from anyone else would anger him, but being content with it if it was his good joshuji.
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f10werfae · 1 year
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Mr. Clingy and Kal
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pairing: Henry Cavill x Actress!Shy!Oblivious!GF!Reader
summary: Fans retell the moments of Henry and Y/n L/n’s relationship despite her being quite the opposite of him. (major clingy Henry) (Requested by anon)
likes, comments and reblogs are appreciated♥️
Henry Masterlist, Full Masterlist, Taglist Form
︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵
@/fansdaily: Anyone see that Henry posted a mirror selfie of him and Y/n in his hotel room, her face hidden in his neck with her arms around his waist, WHILE HE IS KISSING HER FOREHEAD WITH AN ARM AROUND HER WAIST TO KEEP HER CLOSE. Can someone confirm if they’re dating already?? Seeing Henry with someone quieter than him is the best trope
@/barbraturth: Guys Henry just confirmed his and Y/n’s relationship on Instagram!! He posted a picture of Y/n and Kal walking in front of him, with the caption ‘my whole world right in front of me’!!
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@/Peoplesnews: Henry Cavill confirms year long romance with his female lead, Y/n L/n. The younger beautiful star has captured hearts all over the nation, not only for her shy nature, but also for her warm kind heart! We wish the happy couple the best♥️
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@/jointloveduo: Henry just spilled major details on a podcast😭 Apparently for the first two months he was supposedly “courting” Y/n by bringing her flowers and lunch nearly everyday AND SHE DIDNT EVEN REALISE. Instead during one of their extended vacations while on set, he took her swimming and because she’s a weak swimmer she held onto him the entire time. Then he says he kissed her under the sunset on the beach and they’ve been glued together ever since
>> @/lovebug101: I’ve been watching Y/n for years and i’m so glad she’s found someone perfect for her♥️ All of her exes have come out saying she’s too quiet for them, but we all know they jus can’t handle her beauty
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@/beautyandtheleast: I just saw THE Y/n L/n in pets at home with Kal, she was bringing him up and down the toy aisle until he chose something! Henry came up behind her and just hugged her, kissing her cheek and everything😭
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@/Purplerains: When Henry posted a video of him building his PC and then he panned the frame to Y/n who was on the other side of the table, building her own set of legos he bought her🫶 He got her the flowers from the botanical section
>> @/judywrench: “Why are you on the floor love? What are you doing?” When I heard Henry say that while videoing Y/n eating nachos while on the floor of their kitchen at 2am, I fell in love with their relationship. THEN HE JOINED HER AND THEY HAD A WHOLE SNACK SESSION
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@/mysterymachine69: Henry just posted a picture of Y/n laying face down on their bed, their blanket just above her waist AND I JUST WANNA ASK HOW SHE HAS NO BACNE? And was that a hickey I saw on her top left shoulder along with bite marks 😳
>> @/Badbieferrer: Did no one else notice the handcuffs on the bedside table, they’re so purple and fluffy. We always knew Henry was a kinky bastard, he’s completely ruined our Y/n 😂
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@/Loosecanon: Y/n said that before her and Henry dated, he used to help her get to sleep because he knew she had trouble sleeping in trailers. So he would accompany her until she fell asleep and even made her a sleep playlist full of songs he’d play during the day
>> @/cavillgyal1010: Did you see also for his birthday she took him out and absolutely spoiled him. Paid for his dinner and all the things he wanted to buy. What a girlboss.
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@/popincolour: Y/n took Henry to her niece’s sports contest and he started acting like the typical overprotective uncle. When she was knocked down by a boy, Henry started shouting at the referee like a madman😭
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@/HenryCavill: Proud to announce that my best girl, Y/n L/n, has just received her doctorate in (certain job) can’t be prouder to be her man♥️
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@/Pucygrinsh: Henry said that whenever they cuddle Y/n tucks her cold ass feet under his thighs to get warm and whenever he has food she always steals it off him even though she “isn’t hungry” Henry then said that the only way for him to actually get food is to kiss Y/n jus so he can taste it ☠️
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@/Rainbown: Henry and Y/n have their own kiss routine, first her forehead, cheeks, nose then lips.
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@/beautifull101010: Henry said he hates when Y/n wears lip gloss, because when he kisses her it gets all over him. SO NOW HE CARRIES AROUND WIPES FOR WHENEVER HE WANTS TO KISS HER AND THEN HE REAPPLIES THE LIP GLOSS FOR HER
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@/mjtochond: Y/n said in a recent podcast that whenever she needs to pee in the middle of cuddling, Henry will literally accompany her to the bathroom and just chat to her while sitting in the bath tub. What a cute idiot, he’s so in love with her it’s crazy.
>> @/Y/n/L/n: He’s so clingy it’s adorable, he’s like an extra Kal on my leg😭 Only Kal actually leaves me alone when I need the toilet
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@/Turtlensaps: The first time Henry saw Y/n without makeup was when she was having the flu real bad and Henry said she’s never looked so pure and beautiful. She had his sweats and hoodie on, her hair all over the place and all she wanted was hugs from him. Henry then went on to say that she didn’t let him kiss her but he stole one anyway and got sick the next week. SO THEN Y/N HAD TO PLAY NURSE NEXT😩
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@/Exposedtruth: Henry Cavill Spotted with long-term girlfriend Y/n L/n getting close by his childhood home in Jersey! Surrounded by his brothers and their children, the happy couple are seen to be cradling one of Henry’s nephews on their lap, a possible foreshadow for their own?! Y/n was wearing a stunning sun dress which matched Henry’s button up, the image definitely giving off a happy family. Where’s that ring Henry??
———
Taglist Tags (Form is up there^^): @pandaxnienke @thereisa8ella @kimhtoo17 @beck07990 @vrittivsanghavi @dumb-fawkin-bitch @madebylilly @tinyelfperson @athena-roy @fdl305 @kebabgirl67 @mysticfalls01 @marvelgurl @uwiuwi @stormcloudss @princess-paramour @mansaaay @girl-of-multi-fandoms @misshale21 @hallecarey1 @alina02 @bookfrog242 @alexxavicry @nikkitc0703 @mischiefsemimanaged @oliviah-25 @sparklemarysunshine @i-beg-your-pardon-laufeyson @aerangi @lastwandastan @hp-hogwartsexpress @angelmather1 @diyabhanushali1 @spencerreidat4am @keiva1000 @acornacre @ninasw0rld @ggmimitf @teti-menchon0604 @thebaileybugle @p4st3lst4rs @grxnde-dwt @kzhlvlysstuff @thoughtsofreid
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hundredandsix · 1 year
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loser!ellie headcanons
✩ I haven't been able to get loser!ellie out of my head so...here we go. I love that this is basically the same thing as canon!ellie. Slutty thoughts at the end so mdni (18+) ✩
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✩ I don't think she would be the first to make a move. She would do little, very subtle things like hold the door open for you and then panic because oh no that was too much! You're going to know!
✩ She would think she's being obvious, and she is, but not for the reasons she believes. Let's just say her brushing her hand against yours is not nearly as obvious as the way she follows you around and the way your smile makes her face turn red all the way to her ears.
✩ Speaking of her following your around, she is so unintentionally clingy, even before you get together. You would get up to go to the bathroom and when she realizes where you're going, she tries to play it off like she wasn't about to trail after you. When you bring it up to her, she's genuinely confused because no, she is not following you around on purpose. She would never do that.
✩ It would take her forever to realize you're into her, but when she finally picks up on it, that confirmation gives her confidence. She wouldn't be as afraid to make her feelings more apparent.
✩ Has such terrible rizz that it somehow comes full circle and makes her even more charming.
✩ She LOVES bossy, confident women. Ellie is not afraid to ask for what she wants, and she is definitely not the type of girl that would have you ask the waitress questions for her. But there's something about a woman that could put her in her place that she loves.
✩ At first, Ellie is always rubbing the back of her neck or playing with her fingers when she talks to you. She doesn't want to look like a dork, but she can't help it because you make her so nervous.
✩ She's literally the definition of a golden retriever masc. She's got the beat-up truck (that's actually Joel’s, but you don't have to know that), an outrageous amount of flannels, and carabiners to provide it.
✩ When she gets really excited about something, her brain moves faster than her mouth. She'll fumble her words and stutter. She gets really annoyed when this happens and has to take a deep breath and start over.
✩ She loves to rant about her interests to you. Don't you dare seem like you're not listening because she'll get really quiet and upset.
✩ I could see her having issues with being treated like "the man" in past relationships. It confuses her at first because she wants to protect her partner and care for them, but she also wants to feel that same love and desire toward her. She would be so drawn to you if you don't treat her any differently because of the way she dresses or presents herself. Obviously, she presents as more masculine, but she still wants to be treated like a woman.
✩ She has sooo many playlists. There are some about you of course but she also has some that are so highly specific. When you go on your first date, she has a playlist for picking you up and two different ones for dropping your off, depending on how it went. She definitely has the classic "depressed gay longing" playlist.
✩ She has exactly two pictures on her Instagram. One is her and Joel on his birthday and the other is a selfie she uses as her profile pic for everything.
✩ When you follow her back on Instagram, she loses her shit and starts fantasizing about what it would be like to be with you. She's screenshotting every selfie you put on your story and thinking about them in ways that are not very appropriate.
✩ She's the queen of "this reminded me of you" and will bring you literal rocks because "it looks like the whale from the aquarium we saw last week." Whether it's modern!ellie buying you little trinkets or jackson!ellie bringing you things from her patrols, she loves seeing you in all parts of her life. Even if you're not physically there with her.
✩ I love the pages of her journal we get to see in the game because they show us peeks at her internal monologue. They show us she is still very much the eccentric, starry-eyed girl we see in the first game. She's learned to hide it. Maybe to fit in or maybe because she's learned that wearing your heart on your sleeve can hurt. It's literally canon that she writes about her romantic feelings in her journal, so I think she would have little drawings and blurbs about you. She for sure has a stupid grin on her freckled face as she draws the highlights of your eyes and maybe even the dip of your hips. It's the only way she can think of to get you out of her head.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
✩ She's an ass girl. She loves every part of you and will literally kiss your eyelashes if you let her, but she has to physically hold herself back when you bend over.
✩ I can't think of who posted it, but I remember reading something about Ellie fake fucking you when you're bent over and she would totally do that at the absolute worst times. You'd swat her away and look at her with a raised eyebrow, but there's no stopping her because she thinks it's the funniest thing ever.
✩ The first time you kiss is an out-of-body experience for her. She's panicking because she didn't think she'd ever get this far. She wants to touch you but she doesn't know where or what you would like, so her arms are stuck at her sides. She's 🧍until you grab her hands and move them to your waist.
✩ Has a huge obsession with your neck. Loves to leave marks if you'll let her. Will come up behind you and wrap her arms around your waist while leaving wet kisses all down your neck.
✩ I could see her wanting to be both the big and little spoon. It depends on the day and the context. When she's the big spoon she'll jokingly hug you so tight you can barely breathe and wrap all of her limbs around you like she's trying to suffocate you. When she's the little spoon, she likes it when you play with her hair.
✩ Is an absolute slut for you playing with her hair. She's an insomniac and it helps her fall asleep. When you're arm gets tired and you want to stop, she'll whine and pull your hands back to her head.
✩ She would be more comfortable topping and doesn't want to admit that she likes to bottom just as much. She's a service top that would do anything to make you feel good.
✩ Girly is so shy when she bottoms. She'll get all blushy and tries to cover her face with her hands/arms. She loves it, but it feels so foreign to her to have someone's sole focus be on her.
✩ Loves eye contact, especially when your mouth is on her. If you look up at her from between her legs while giving her head, she has trouble thinking straight.
✩ Likes it when you pull her hair during sex and will groan for you to pull harder. Just move her wherever you want her because she thinks it's the hottest thing ever.
✩ I think she'd use a strap if you wanted her to, but it's not her instinct to grab for that. She rather you come apart on her fingers or mouth.
✩ If you wanted to use a strap on her, I think she would let you, but again, it's not something she would ask for. To Ellie, It would be more about pleasing you than her.
✩ Absolutely passes tf out after sex. She always tries to stay awake, but as soon as both of you are cleaned up, she's dozing off and letting out cute little snores.
✩ In summary, Ellie is the switchiest switch to ever exist and I will be taking no criticism on this
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08luvmailz · 5 months
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⌨︎ ⁩◞ HERO FANBOY — ! ❪shoto todoroki❫
SYNOPSIS ୨୧ ! which a certain hero from ua crushes (hard) on a idol ! headcanon, ooc shoto
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FANBOY SHOTO! He wasn't interested in kpop activities, heck he hardly known anything about kpop in general.
He started knowing about them because of his brother natsuo who bought a heck ton of albums and blasting music in his room.
He side-eye his brother when he's screaming because he got your WINK-PHOTOCARD, as he keep screaming " omg! ITS SO SPARKS "
he saw the photocard and he was like " oh she's pretty " but disregard it afterwards BUTT
DIDNT KNOW HE WOULD FELL THAT HARD
he saw one of your recent comebacks on tv because his brother is streaming it and gahdam ur fucking SPARKLING ON STAGE.
At first he started knowing your group, YOU FIRST then streaming your group songs, your debut solo, collabs. streaming your group shows and music bank AND ALL THOSE
started buying albums too with natsuo. FINALLY HE HAVE SOMEONE IN THE FAMILY WHO WILL BE IN DEPT FOR LIFE BUYING ALBUMS
Natsuo asked who is his bias without hesitation he said your name, bro was smirking so bad at his lil bro BECAUSE YOU ARE THE MAKNAE OF YOUR GROUP, also half japanese and same age as him.
Bro was blushing whenever the camera pans at your face and smirking and doing that HE WAS GETTING HOTTER THAN HIS QUIRK
have a well known kpop stan twitter account who always make short comment about you but ICONIC because of how pure and sweet it is
doesnt know it but actually fell inlove with you NOT BECAUSE OF UR FACE (its a plus on him) but because of your determination and hard work, humour and personality is just CHEFS KISS
no one knows about his obsession welp it almost slip up when he accidently unplug his wired earphones to his phone AND SUDDENLY BLASTING Nobody knows by your group.
he lied he is just a casual listener
defends you on twitter, he looks like a soft boy but damn he is a beast on roasting BUT FAILS CAUSE HE CAN ONLY CUSS AT THEM
dedicated to buy front row tickets when your group finally have a concert there at your hometown
BRO WAS FIGHTING FOR LIFE AT THE POOR CONNECTION
bro brought the vip tickets for him and his big bro (with his dads money ofc, not like his father would know)
bro brought the 2 tickets for each day
won a fancall with you once but DAMN IT HIS HERO STUFF IS GETTING ON THE WAY
poor bby sulked the whole day that he missed the call, he was practicing his lines and tone for you
brought many batteries for his lightstick
make sure he is lookin good (not like he isn't good looking)
bro wake up early asf he want to be there as fast
bro became popular fan after one pictured him as the guy from the (group name) concert at jpn
he didnt know he bacame popular, he just saw his face 3 days after the concert on stan twt
BRO WHEN YOU TWO MAKE EYE CONTACT HE HAS HEART EYES
BRO WAS WHIPPED ASF
you are one stubborn fuck saw this cute guy with a scar and went through the barricades even though security was trying to get you back in stage cause its just a sound check and your safety too
Bro you came closer to him and saw his instax reaching for you. MADE A HEART CHEEK AT HIS FACE AND CAME CLOSER TO HIS FACE
bro almost want to faint right then and there.
you went after that he was kinda sad but happy he got a selfie WITH HIM
making this his lockscreen and making a frame of this treasured photo
You kept stealing glances at him and interacting with hand language, asking if he already eat lunch or just blantly flirting with him
LUCKIEST FAN
natsuo kept pushing his shoulders for every interaction at their section BUT MAINLY YOU ARE FOCUSED ON HIS BROTHER
bro when he came back from school BRO WAS BOMBARDED WITH QUESTIONS LIKE
" I DIDNT KNOW UR A FAN TODOROKI! " " WHY DIDNT YOU TELL ME UR A FAN, I WANT TO BUY TICKETS TOO " " i didn't know todoroki listens to kpop " "BRO DID U HAVE PICS AND VID OF (your leader name) "
was now known as poker face but listens to puppy love by (groupname)
After that twt post of him being a handsome fan THEN PEOPLE STARTED SAYING HE WAS THE KID FROM UA, ENDEAVOR SON AND ALL THOSE SHIT
have an article of him now being the hero fan boy
boy he didnt give a shit about them, he just wanting to chill
but that didnt start there
your member posted on weverse a video of you taken, watching the sports festival and chanting HIS NAME AND BETTING THAT HE WOULD 1st PLACE
bro became the luckiest fan alive
saying he is the luckiest fan and hero and all of those then actually GONNA MEET YOU
you have a campaign like a collab with a hero AND THAT IS HIS DAD
participating on a event JUST TO SEE YOU
he did and boy was he nervous
he kept stuttering at the end of his sentence
then because actually friend with you, a little bit touchy side BUT HE IS A GENTELEMAN just subtle glances and touches
got your number and him posting a selfie of you two on twt (he made another acc just to post boast that picture)
after that he was well known as the hero fanboy who will soon in the future marry his idol
that woud be a story in another time <3
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dimepdf · 1 year
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★  𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐃𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐆𝐇𝐓. + 𝐉𝐉𝐊 𝐌𝐄𝐍
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masterlist. / taglist. / any request? synopsis. the jjk men and how perverted they would be to their partner.
─── ☆ notes. sorry for being flakey i've been recovering from having Agust D tickets stolen right out of my hands (i was too late putting in my card information) so i'm pretty much in constant mourning at the moment. | — feedback is always welcomed & don't forget to reblog 🤍
─── ☆ genre and warnings. +18 nsfw under the cut. minors dni | masterbation | scent kink | oral sex | facials | marking | possessiveness | manipulation(?) | sub/dom | switching | brat taming | voyeurism | exhibitionism | mentions of multiple partners | sadism | biting | rough sex | cock warming | creampie | is you see a typo simply ignore it | title inpso by this song.
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★     NANAMI KENTO !
‣ He would take it to the grave, though, with the type of things he would do when he did not have your comfort: tucking his shoes to the side and tossing aside his tie after a long day at work, all those rightful morals get tossed aside as well, seeing you had left to go back to your own home, leaving the almost overbearing traces of you against his mattress and pillows.
‣ tucking his face into his bed sheets while he slowly reaches down to undo the buckle of his belt, his hand creeping under the button of his pants in search to help ease the tension that grew as his erection engulfed in him what was left of you.
‣ grunting pathetically as he stuffed his face against his pillow, fucking his fist, the thought of your body, the things you two would do under the sheets.
‣ He will do anything he needs to do to not ruin his gentlemanly persona, his thoughts about you are more tamed and docile than those of the others, who would be more open with their thoughts.
‣ but I feel like Nanami wouldn’t really show his true nature no matter how many times you poke and prod at him, taunting him sexually, he’ll always make it seem as if you are the one that always suggests something first.
‣ I feel like he's also very into seeing you cry, especially if you like light bondage, whether he’s tying your hands together with his tie or holding your wrist behind your back with his belt.
‣ But on a rare occasion, like when he’s just mentally exhausted and really craving your touch and needs a little widedown, he can't help but  be a little touchy and needy for some sense of comfort.
‣ That comfort comes in a lot of ways: cuddling, making out, handjobs, and helping his very terrible oral fixation that never fails to have you fall victim to house mouth by spreading out on top of any and every surface in his home with your thighs trembling as your knee was bent over his shoulder.
★     GOJO SATORU !
‣ This man is very shameless and vocal about the things he wants and will do to you, so shameless that you have to apologize to anyone within a hearing radius.
‣ He literally does not care and does not have an ounce of decorum in his body.
‣ No matter how much he teases you for being "obsessed," you both know damn well how overly possessive he is over you and your body. There is never a time your two are in the same room and he doesn't have his hands all over you.
‣ The problem is that he isn't ashamed of talking about the things he wants to do with you to literally any poor victim willing to listen; he had the dedicated photo album full of saved selfies and pictures and the very lewd picture of you in lingerie tucked in his wallet, ready to be pulled out at any unfortunate time.
‣ The more you two get comfortable and closer, I feel like he will get more whiny and needy for your physical contact and attention, touching and kissing all over you in public.
‣  Kissing all over you, including the multiple items he would spoil you with, ranging from expensive lingerie in his favorite color to little trinkets that remind him of you. His favorite thing to do is buy you clothes and have you try them on in front of him.
‣  He just cannot keep his hands to himself, especially when you look so good in the sexy suit he bought from Victoria Secret that just complimented your boobs so much. It shouldn't be a surprise that it only takes him a glance before he’s tugging your panties to the side and fucking you against the wall.
★     TOJI FUSHIGURO !
‣ Another shameless man who does not give a fuck where he is or who’s around; when he wants you, he wants you.
‣ Definitely more subtle compared to Gojo (which isn't saying much).
‣ He’s just a major tits guy and loves when you post selfies with cleavage just to screenshot for his gallery and zoom in on your chest.
‣ If you happen to be in his company, rather than lounging around cuddling, his hands will at some point end up under your shirt, fondling your chest and pinching your nipples, using your boobs like a personal stress ball, and if he's not doing that, his head is tucked under your shirt, sucking hickies on them as if it were some normal occurrence.
‣ There’s no normal moment when you're dating Toji; this man knows he can act upon his lewd desires and will tuck your panties in his back pocket after sex as if they were some type of award for making you finish twice.
‣  He’s a man with artistic ability; that being said, he likes how you look covered in his cum; rather, it's all over your face, boobs, buttocks, and stomach. You better believe he’s pulling out and painting all over you.
‣ will get a little whiny whenever you try to clean yourself off, but it's fine because the moment you get out of the shower, he’s tapping you in for another round (rest in peace your ability to walk straight).
 ‣ He does not have a single shameless bone in his body; in fact, he loves it when you catch him doing something pervy; he only gets more excited.
‣ Rather its jerking off with your underwear and possibly grunting out your name knowing you're a step away, the moment that door swings open, he’s holding eye contact and fucking his fist.
‣ As much as people assume Toji to be some hard dom I feel like he does have a bit of a bratty side, and it does not help that he can get super petty, especially if he doesn't get what he wants. Oh, lord, that man will teasingly taunt like there's no tomorrow.
‣ And the worst part is that he does it as if he isn't the one practically whining for you to touch him.
‣ Don't even bother trying to get payback, whether it's trying to get him winded up with a cute lewd text or sending a sext picture of yourself, he will hit back ten times as hard and even make you drag it out until he’s the one with the upper hand.  
★     GETO SUGURU !
‣ okay… So I know what I said about Gojo being the most perverted, but I think that Geto might sometimes give him a run for his money.
‣ He's got the shameless thing all checked, in fact, he's so shameless that he makes you feel embarrassed and flustered, as if you're the one at fault.
‣ He is the same with Toji, he doesn't care who’s near doesn't matter he has his hands all over you, taunting and teasing you right in front of his friends he does not give a single care.
‣ He loves getting you all flustered in public, no matter who’s listening, he will straight out ask you to touch him whenever he feels like it.
‣ He loves the thought of you coming undone with an audience watching how much he can please you, a possessive sense of pride waving over him as he fucks you in front of everyone, telling them exactly who you belong to as you moan out his name. As long as you keep your eyes on him, there won't be a problem.
‣ frames lewd pictures of you, I’m not even kidding.
‣ I feel like he would have one of those huge portraits of you modeled in fancy lingerie hung like art in his living room, or small portraits of you in his bedroom.
‣ When you first noticed them, he just sort of smirked as you tried to tell him off.
★     SUKUNA RYOMEN !
‣ Oh brother, this dude gets grimy with it. 
‣ He’s got a major god complex, so it shouldn't come as much of a surprise that he doesn't see that what he’s doing is perverted, downright bad, to the point where he calls you a pervert for still liking him knowing the type of shit he’s into.
‣ Is a panty sniffing, dick stepping, fucking in public or even while his friends watch, watching you shower, jacking off while laying next to you, type of freak.
‣ Let's step back and backtrack on that friend thing. To everyone's surprise, Sukuna loves sharing, so much so that he’s into watching you get passed around by his friends.
‣ Practically invented voyeurism, loves the look on your face while you're getting railed, but only while you hold eye contact with him and moan his name while you're with some other dude.
‣ Sure he’s possessive, but in cocky way. 
‣ He knows he’s better than any other man you’ll ever be with, he’s the best thing that has ever graced your silly little pitbull life, so no matter how many times you complain about some sad pitful fuck, he knows it’ll never beat the multiple times he’d leave you trembling from just his mouth.
‣ He’s a huge tease with his tongue and long fingers, you’d have to be in tears and whimpering out his name before he'd consider pulling his dick out and fucking you.
‣ Is very huge on crying, whether it's from overstimulation or you just being overwhelmed from being angry at him. Just know the little devils on both sides of his shoulders are practically barking at him to bend you over and fuck you when the tears start spilling. 
‣ He’s a mean fucking, hair tugging, biting, leaving bruises, slapping, degrading—you could name anything that inflicts some sort of pain, and Sukuna has already tried it.
‣ But on the very rare occasion when he allows you too to take just a bit of charge, his desperate side does get a chance to shine out more, begging for you to let him cum in you, begging for you to give him orders.
‣ Sex will always end with you feeling like some type of jelly-filled doughnut (I'm so sorry), and he refuses to cum anywhere else but inside of you, let alone let you move from his grasp when he’s done. Best believe you’re keeping his cock warm for the rest of the night.
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spdrwdw · 5 months
Text
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Art by peachypie
Pairing: Miguel x f!Reader
Warnings: None, just fluff
Summary: You and Miguel attend a Christmas party at work where you receive the best Christmas gift you could ever hope for.
Word Count: 3k
A/N: Decided to whip up a quick little Christmas fic. Sorry for it being posted last minute lmao. Hope everyone has a happy holiday!
Masterlist
☆*:.。. o .。.:*☆ ☆*:.。. o .。.:*☆ ☆*:.。. o .。.:*☆ ☆*:.。. o .。.
It was the week before Christmas and the bakery where you worked was just bustling with people. Nonstop orders were coming in as you continued baking various breads and pastries. 
Your face and apron were just covered in flour and frosting and who knows what else. You just looked a hot mess, honestly. But, on the positive side, you being busy with orders made the time just breeze through, and you were thankful, because everything was hurting by the end of your shift. Arms, legs, neck, back. Everything ached. 
“I could really use a massage right about now,” you sighed as you began your clean up routine after the doors closed. 
Miguel, your coworker and best friend, was up front counting the till for the night. 
“Yeah? Hmm, well, I happen to be pretty good at giving massages, you know. If you want some relief,” he replied, shooting a smirk and a wink your way as you walked past him. 
You rose a brow at him, feeling your cheeks heating up at his words before finally shaking your head at him. 
“Why do I feel like you mean something completely different by that?” You questioned. 
“Maybe you should get that mind of yours out of the gutter,” Miguel shot back at you, causing you to flinch. 
“Rude,” you muttered under your breath as you headed back into the kitchen. 
Once Miguel had finished counting the funds made that day and finished cleaning up at the front of the store, he made his way to the back to help you with whatever else you needed. 
“Don’t we have that Christmas party going on in two days?” You then asked, trying to remember when the shop’s Christmas party was going to be held. 
Miguel nodded his head as he cleaned up the mixers. “Yeah. It’s gonna be on Saturday. We’ll be closing shop early for it. We’re also doing Secret Santa during the party, too.”
“Oh, crap! I honestly forgot about that! Crap crap crap!” You hissed, shaking your head as you swept the floor. You definitely had to drop by the mall and buy something for Jess. You really forgot all about the Secret Santa thing. You were so preoccupied with school and finals that it had just slipped your mind.
“Well, you’re welcome for the reminder,” Miguel snickered.
You rolled your eyes at him, however, grateful for the reminder. You didn’t want to attend the Christmas party without your secret Santa gift. 
Once everything was cleaned and checked off, Miguel closed up shop for the night. 
“You’ll be okay getting home?” Miguel asked as he locked the front doors. 
“Yeah, I should be alright. I can catch the last bus home,” you assured him as you zipped up your jacket and stuffed your hands into the jacket’s pockets. 
“Alright. Keep your phone on you and text me when you get home.”
Miguel may be a pain in the ass at times. But, he was still your best friend and he always looked out for you.
“I will. Promise. Have a good night, Miguel,” you smiled up at him, nodding your head.
It also didn’t help that he made your heart skip a beat sometimes when he acted so sweet towards you. Just fueling the silly little crush you had for him since you both met during your freshman year of college, 
“Good night,” he smiled back at you as you turned at your heel and began to walk the opposite way.
Miguel watched you for a moment before you turned the corner, waiting a couple of minutes before he walked the opposite  direction to head home. 
As promised, you texted him once you got to your apartment, even sent him a selfie of you at the front door, sticking your tongue out and giving him a peace sign before you opened the door and stepped inside. 
The next couple of days were a blur. You did not remember the events that happened during those days that had led you to the day of the Christmas party. 
All your coworkers were there. Including Miguel. Of course, he would be there. 
Everyone was dressed up, either wearing ugly sweaters or Christmas themed clothes. You settled for a cute Santa dress. 
People brought in food, either store bought or homemade. You decided to bake some gingerbread cookies to bring in. You did work at a bakery, after all, and everyone seemed to enjoy them despite constantly being around baked goods. 
The party was going well. Everyone was mingling, eating, drinking, and even dancing around in the shop. You were talking to Jess and MJ, sitting down on a booth over at a corner of the shop. Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed Miguel staring at you, or possibly at the table. 
Since he was your best friend, he sometimes acted like a sad puppy when he wasn’t allowed to be part of the ‘girl group’ that was you, Jess, and MJ. 
You couldn’t help but smile in his direction. He caught your expression and smiled back at you before moving his attention back to the conversation he was having with Peter and Ben. 
While things continued to go great, something else had caught your eye. Ben. 
He was staring at you. You noticed he had been staring at you the entire time. You didn’t think anything of it at first. While he wasn’t a close friend of yours, you did talk to him from time to time. Either during work or if you ran into him on campus. 
But, it had gotten to a point that it made you feel a little uncomfortable. You were aware of his crush on you. And you did even go on a date with him one time a while ago, but it just didn’t click. You didn’t like him like that. And him staring at you at that moment, made you cringe a little.
Miguel seemed to notice it, too. And he didn’t like it. Not one bit. He knew why Ben was staring at you. It was your outfit. While there was nothing wrong with what you were wearing, you looked absolutely cute in it. 
You were wearing the red santa dress, and you had put on some makeup to match the outfit. While you did wear makeup every now and then when you were up to it, you usually didn’t wear it as you did today. It made you look..different. In a way in which Miguel just couldn’t describe. It made his heart skip a beat every time you caught his gaze and smiled at him. 
However, your outfit had caught Ben’s attention as well. And while Miguel was good friends with Ben, he wasn’t going to have him staring at you, either. 
“What are you looking at, Ben?” Miguel asked, trying to divert the blonde’s attention. 
“Hmm? What?” Ben hummed, still looking your way. 
“What are you staring at?” Miguel repeated, with a tiny hint of aggression in his voice. 
Ben raised a brow as he finally looked over at Miguel before shaking his head. “Nothing.” 
“Nothing?”
Ben shrugged. “Okay, maybe I have been staring at the girls over there, but I mean, dude, can you blame me?” Ben slightly nudged over in your direction.
“She looks really good in that outfit. Don’t you think? Like..damn,” Ben chuckled a little. 
Miguel simply grunted in response. However, he didn’t like how Ben kept staring at you. It made him feel some type of way. He wasn’t possessive of you. He had no right to be. But, it did irk him a bit when other guys stared at you. And he lowkey wanted to punch Ben at that moment. His hands were already clenched into tight fits, getting ready to strike.
“Yo, Miguel. Helllooooo. Earth to Miguel!” Peter waved his hand in front of Miguel, trying to catch his attention. 
“W-what?” Miguel blinked as he was snapped out of his thoughts, looking back over at Peter. 
“Sorry. What was that?”
Peter rolled his eyes. “I asked if you were gonna want another beer? I was gonna grab some more from the cooler,” Peter repeated. 
“Oh. y-yeah yeah. Sure. Thanks,” Miguel nodded his head as Peter and Ben both went into the kitchen to grab more beers. 
He then looked back over to the table and noticed that you were no longer there. Where did you go?
“Miguel? You okay?” You asked, appearing beside him, causing him to jump a bit in surprise before looking over at you. You simply looked up at him, head tilted slightly in curiosity. 
“I noticed you’ve been a little out of it today. You alright?” 
“Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine,” Miguel assured you, giving you a gentle smile. 
“You sure?” You asked, not really believing him.
“Promise,” he nodded just at Peter and Ben made his way back out. 
You then nodded your head and took a step back before making your way over to your other coworkers to talk to them for a bit. Miguel could hear everyone complimenting your outfit. He realized that he hadn’t said anything about it yet. He should bring it up before the night ends. 
About another hour or so had gone by, people were a little more loose, a little more rowdy. The music was louder, the conversations produced more laughter, and people were just a little more bold and daring. 
You had gone into the kitchen to grab yourself some more food, feeling your stomach growling. You grabbed a plate and began to load it with food, humming softly to yourself along to the music that was playing on the other side. You didn’t notice someone entering the kitchen, approaching you. 
“Still stuffing your face with food?” Miguel smirked as he appeared beside you, causing you to flinch slightly in surprise. You pouted and glared up at him before rolling your eyes. 
“This is nothing compared to your sixth helping of this entire table you had a couple minutes ago!” You pointed out. 
“I can’t help it. I’m a growing boy,” Miguel joked, shrugging his shoulders. 
You rolled your eyes again before going back to serving your food. “You want me to get you anything?” 
Miguel shook his head. “Nah. I can grab my own food. I appreciate it, though.”
The kitchen fell silent for a moment. The only thing that could be heard was everything going on on the other side. People were still chattering and laughing, music still booming. Yet, it was dead silent in the kitchen. A sort of tension then filled between the two of you. You could feel your heart beating against your eardrums. 
You were about to open your mouth to say something before you felt Miguel pressing himself against you from behind , but not hard enough to hurt you. You still had some wiggle room to turn around. And you did just as Miguel leaned down closer to you. 
“I hate what you do to me sometimes,” MIguel practically growled as he grabbed you by the arm, squeezing just a bit, but not hard enough to hurt you. 
You looked up at him with wide eyes, caught completely by surprise as you gave him a confused expression. 
“What? What are you talking about?” 
Miguel’s nostrils flared as he exhaled, looking at you with darkened eyes. 
“You make me feel these feelings that I feel like I should not be having.”
“Miguel..I really don’t understand what it is that you’re trying to tell me,” you stated. Which was true. You had no idea what he was talking about or why he was looking at you like that. Yet, you could feel your heart racing a bit. Was it excitement?
Miguel let out a frustrated sigh. He knew he wasn’t making any sense at that moment, but he really did hope you caught on to what he was attempting to spew out. 
He was terrible at explaining things anyway. However, this was the one thing that he didn’t want to be terrible with. 
“Just..come here for a moment,” he said as he pulled you away from the table, pulling you deeper into the kitchen over to a more secluded area. 
He then took your hand and placed it over his heart. Your eyes widened when you felt his heart racing against your palm. 
You then looked back up at him, meeting his eyes. He had those puppy eyes that made your knees buckle. 
“Miguel I-”
“You don’t have to say anything,” he interrupted, shaking his head. “I just..wanted to let you know.Or..let you feel, rather.”
He let go of your hand and took a step back, biting his lower lip. It made your heart skip a beat. 
“Look. I know you may not feel the same. But, I just wanted to let you know. I’ve..been feeling this way for a while. And..I don’t know why I waited this long to tell you. But, seeing how Riley was looking at you the entire time made me feel some type of way. I know you two were somewhat of a thing before and it kinda made me feel a little jealous..” he rambled. He was honestly really cute when he did that. 
He then awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck when you didn’t answer. What were you supposed to say after that? You were completely stunned that you just couldn’t find your voice. 
But, as he began to take a step back, your hand shot forward and you grabbed hold of his wrist, pulling him back closer to you. You were like a robot. You had no control of your limbs or movements. 
Stretching up on your toes, you hooked your arms around his neck, pulling him down closer to you until your lips touched. Again, you had no control of your movements. It was as if your mind had stepped into another room in your brain. 
Miguel’s eyes widened in surprise, obviously stunned by your sudden reaction. However, he quickly shook it off and wrapped his arms around you, pressing you closer to him.
You two kissed for what felt like hours. At one point, he had picked you up and placed you on top of a stack of boxes so neither of you would strain your bodies. 
Eventually, you had to pull away for air. Your cheeks were warm, and your body felt jittery. You couldn’t help but to look away shyly. Yet, Miguel caught your chin with his fingers and had you look up at him. His lips were swollen from your heated kisses. There was also a twinkle in his eye. 
Before you could get a word out, his lips were on your once again. This time, just a little softer. A little sweeter. Gentler. It made you melt into his arms. 
He pecked your lips a couple more times before taking a step back, but never let go of you. 
“Had I known you felt the same I would’ve done that a lot sooner,” he chuckled, giving you a shy smile. 
Your cheeks warmed again and you nodded your head in agreement. “Yeah. Same here.”
He helped you back down, taking your hand in his. 
“Also. Ben and I were never a ‘thing’. I only went out on one date with him. He’s..not really my type,” you shrugged your shoulders, looking up at him with a slight smirk. 
“I like them a little more rugged. Like more..jackass,” you teased. 
Miguel’s jaw dropped for a second before letting out a laugh, shaking his head a little bit. 
“Not sure if that’s something to be proud of,” he pointed out. 
“Didn’t say I was,” you countered with a shrug before grinning up at him. You felt butterflies in your stomach, and you couldn’t help but to feel excited. Stretching back up on your toes, you gave him another peck on the lips. 
Remove his hand from yours, he wrapped his arm around your waist, pulling you close before grabbing your plate of food from the table. 
“Come on, let’s go sit down so you can eat,” he said as you two made your way out of the kitchen. 
“Oh, by the way. You look great in that outfit,” Miguel complimented. 
“Yeah?” You beamed up at him. You’ve been getting compliments all night. But, you didn’t think you’d get one from Miguel. 
His cheeks turned a little red as he nodded his head. “Yeah. I couldn’t stop staring at you. You’re like a Christmas present. Mind if I unwrap you later?” He then smirked. 
You gasped and lightly smacked him, causing him to burst out laughing. 
“Absolutely not! Pervert!”
Miguel continued to laugh. “I’m just messing with you, muñeca. I’ll wait until Christmas Eve to unwrap you.”
“Miguel!” 
“What are you guys talking about?” Peter suddenly appeared in front of the two of you as you exited the kitchen. His mouth was stuffed with food and was a little red in the cheeks. He may have been just a bit drunk. 
“Nothing.” You and Miguel both said in unison before passing by Peter. 
Still. You couldn’t have asked for a better Christmas gift. Miguel had confessed his feelings to you. And shared a set of kisses with you in the kitchen. It was all surreal. It felt like a dream. 
“Look! It’s snowing!” MJ called out excitedly as she stood by the window. Everyone gathered around the windows to look outside as the snow fell. Including you and Miguel. Your food was now forgotten on the table as he kept his arm wrapped around your waist, the two of you looking outside for a moment as if neither of you had seen snow before. 
“Merry Christmas,” Miguel whispered softly to you. 
“Merry Christmas, Miguel,” you whispered back, leaning against him as you continued to watch the snow fall and coat the streets in white. 
Yeah, this was definitely a Christmas you were never going to forget. 
“Also, if Riley stares at you like that again, I’m going to punch him,” Miguel muttered. 
“Miguel!” 
☆*:.。. o .。.:*☆ ☆*:.。. o .。.:*☆ ☆*:.。. o .。.:*☆ ☆*:.。. o .。.
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nkogneatho · 1 year
Note
pasi can you write anything about blue lock boys reacting to y/n wearing their clothes or any jewellery like thing?💕 luv uu
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𝐁𝐋𝐔𝐄 𝐋𝐎𝐂𝐊 𝐁𝐎𝐘𝐒 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐎 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐖𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐈𝐑 𝐂𝐋𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐒/𝐉𝐄𝐖𝐄𝐋𝐑𝐘
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—cw: gn!reader, suggestive.
#Buy me a coffee? #m.list #whoreclub
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—NAGI, REO, KUNIGAMI
He'd just be sitting on the couch, streaming or scrolling on their phone and then you suddenly pop up. And not just you but you in his hoodie. He won't react at first but OMG. HE IS INTERNALLY SCREAMING.
"Babe. What are you wearing?"
"Oh. I found it on the bed and I thought it would
look good on me. Should I remov-" He doesn't even let you finish your sentence.
Softly, he pulls you by your wrist and places you on his lap, trailing soft kisses on your temple.
The next day in your closet, all your clothes are gone and replaced with his.
—ISAGI, BAROU, RIN, CHIGIRI
I don't think he would mind you wearing anything he owns. I mean, you already own his heart so whatevers is his, is also yours.
It had been so exhausting to focus on work. All he wanted was to come home, and wrap his arms around you.
The keys jingled and the door knob clacked, and he made his way past the hall. You suddenly appeared out of the bathroom with a towel ruffling your wet hair. His eyes noticed how you were wearing his boxers. He got flustered at first, given that it caught him off guard. But you know, how quickly his innocent look changed into a playful one.
"Hmm...looks good on you, love. Will look better tugged near your feet."
—BACHIRA, SHIDOU, SAE
He actually likes you seeing you in his clothes and accessories.
But even though after buying like eleven matching stuffs, you manage to lose them here and there.
So one day, you just decided that rather than buying it again, you'll share the jewelries
You wanted to click some cool pictures since you had dressed after so long. Yet, the outfit felt incomplete. Oh, yes. It was the watch and maybe some cool hat. But you lost yours, so you decided that you'll just I borrow his for the sake of a good selfie.
He walked in on you, leaning against the window frame with your arms raised in air for a good angle.
Your other hand ran playfully through your hair, and the watch was looking so hot on you. The sunlight making it even better for a golden hour effect.
"Looks great," He scared you, speaking so suddenly. "Now how about this angle?" He immediately took your hand and wrapped it around their neck. "Go ahead. Click a picture of me too, baby."
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