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norris55s · 6 months

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reputation - lando norris

pop star reader x lando norris social media au

part two - part three

a/n: lando did a very reputation-like helmet and the hamster in my brain started working. rep's songs are also very lando coded to me. faceclaim is soyeon from (G)I-dle

requests are open, but i may get to them late because uni is kicking my ass!

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f1waggossip

f1waggossip: McLaren’s golden boy seems to be newly single… at least that’s what the streets say, considering his last girlfriend, pop star Y/N L/N, has not been seen in months at the paddock following a very public fall out with her former girl squad, and consequent fall from grace from everyone’s eyes. They seemed in love. What do you think?

landonorrizz: honestly, i never understood the hype for her. she has always been a red flag and dramatic!!

mercedesgarage: i don’t get it lol i don’t follow her, what happened?

455chilli: basically she was friends with other singers, models and actresses and they have recently unfollowed her and exposed her for not being as great as everyone thinks

y/nforever: you mean she had a friend group who turned on her out of nowhere? lol what her ex friends have said is based on jealousy

landostareyes: it seems like they broke up but they were really cute together :// i kinda feel bad but she also seems to be the problem

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landonorris

landonorris: p2 cake babyyyyyyyyy

supremey/n: that is my y/n if i’ve ever seen her

formulaonegirl: so they’re still together

carlandocontent: it could be any girl tbh, it’s been months since lando has even mentioned her

papayaheart: it’s even worse if they’re still together and she just won’t show up to support him in races anymore lol

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y/nusername

y/nusername: Reputation. Out November 17.

Comments have been disabled.

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landonorris

landonorris: Are you ready for it? Reputation out November 17.

y/nlandodefender: nothing has ever been as iconic as a Y/N comeback special helmet i am in tears

landolove: reputation helmet to beat the breakup allegations wasn’t on my bingo card

supremey/n: I KNOW THAT’S RIGHT

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f1waggossip

f1waggossip: Y/N re-debuts at the paddock.

y/naura: ohhhhhhh i know some of y'all are MAD but my girl will stay thriving with the album of the year

softlylando: came back with a bang, goddamnnnn

mclarengirly: lando is definitely bagging a podium for her today!!

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landonorris

landonorris: i like her for her

y/nusername: Even in my worst times, you could see the best in me. 🖤

ferrariheart: shut up this is so cute

norrisreputation: mans really said we've been together all this time LMAO

babyfaceoscar: where is everyone who was calling her a red flag and saying her and lando didn't belong together?

dailylando: been real quiet since reputation dropped

magicy/n: i woulda stfu too after she released something like call it what you want, nevermind lando's promotion helmet LMAO

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y/nusername

y/nusername: The Reputation World Tour officially began and I can’t thank you enough for showing up for me, when I thought I couldn’t even show up for myself. I might make the same mistakes, burn bridges and never learn, but I know I did one thing right: have the best, most loyal fans. Also, it seems right to thank the man who inspired me to write way too many love songs for this album, the king of my heart, landonorris. 🖤

landonorris: i believe i was also called gorgeous and stuff

y/nusername: I am truly never complimenting you again

#f1 #f1 au #f1 fanfic #f1 smau #f1 social media au #f1 x reader #formula 1 #lando norris #lando norris smau #lando norris fluff #lando norris x you #lando norris fic #lando norris imagine #lando norris au #lando norris x reader #lando norris x y/n

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sorryimananti-romantic · 10 months

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Ateez as Dads-

collab with loren @eightmakesonebraincell who shares the same single braincell as me bc we know we're not the only ones obsessed with the recent ateez x children content

(disclaimer: i don't like babies. but the idea of ateez handling babies? adorable. loren, however, loves kids so here's the outcome)

Hongjoong

"hold this thing, i don't know what to do with it."

"that's your child, hongjoong."

looks like the frightened hamster meme when the baby starts crying out of nowhere

sometimes sleeps through the baby crying its lungs out at night LMAO but that's only when he's exhausted asf

bet he'll write a song or two about fatherhood too and you'll be like 'what would you know about it you slept through the night'

may be uncomfortable at times but when he starts bonding, you'll see it in his actions

like when he reforms cute little things like clothings or shoes for his baby, adding little dangly things to the crib

or when he makes cute accessories for the baby

matching reformed things omg

super stylish matching parent-kid duo

the bonding literally happens with the smallest moment like one day the baby is crying in his arms and tugs at his shirt with its little fist and he's done for he loves his kid 10000x more all of a sudden

and when the baby calms down immediately after coming into his arms? he'll die of happiness

and when the baby recognises him in a group of people??? new level of dad unlocked

literally melts whenever the kid runs across the room to fly into his arms or calls him daddy

paints the room for his kid and gives them a wall in their room to paint whatever they like

lets the kid paint his nails and they could even have that one matching painted fingernail omg

later when the kid grows up they'll have uv lights and like the latest stuff for nails but you bet hongjoong's gonna dry that nail paint by blowing on it-

literally the most supportive, allowing the kid to explore beyond conventional boundaries and guiding them along

also very attentive esp when they start growing up and observing

he'll make sure he answers all of their curious little questions to the best of their understanding

and surprisingly, he won't mind his kid in his studio

like how adorable is it when you find your kid in his lap, sharing earphones as he composes?

he just loves it when they sit on him or when they lie down next to him/on top of him when he's resting that's his therapy

Seonghwa

more of a mother than the real mother

knows exactly what to do like he's raised six kids already (i'm looking at you ateez)

wakes up at ass o clock in the morning to shush the crying baby so you can get some sleep :')

mother-coded that's what he is

you'll definitely be learning motherhood from him LMAO

but jokes aside he's actually the best partner you could have asked for in such a situation

he's so so patient with the kid and you

esp you

he understands when you're overwhelmed and when you need a break

so he's always willing to give you some space and takes care of the kid in the meanwhile which is so :')

so you try your best to return it to him in every way as well <3

you'll both be figuring this journey out together and that's the best part

bonds with the kid so good

esp when they start going to school and he literally can't wait for them to get home so he can hear about how their day was

lives for the gossip he gets from his kids about school too LOL

he'll be like yass give me the tea come on

also pretty much behaves like a kid when he's having a good time with his kids

like he goes 'no it's my turn to select the ice cream flavour you have to try this you'll love it i'm not hearing a no-'

kids teach him new slangs but you bet he'll stick to the good old 'no cap' and 'yeet'

gets matching stupid stuff like those green alien glasses for him and the kid-

you just know your kids will love him more than you and you accept it. you don't mind that at all bc he's such a lovable person

he'll always be running around the house with them trying to catch them or letting them catch him

they will watch animated movies together and draw together and make legos together they're gonna share that obsession

he's there. always. in every moment of their life :')

Yunho

curious to learn

but that doesn't stop him from playing with the baby like they're a toy boi has no fear

he's always gushing over how small and cute and adorable they are

he'll also be a bit scared at first to hold the baby in his arms but will get used to it real quick

loves feeding them and cleaning them with you

he's got some sort of magic to him too he can soothe a crying baby in seconds

plays with them/holds them like they're a cat/puppy

gives them rides on his shoulders and they love it you can hear their laughter ring around the house

teases you about how they look nothing like you but if they do look like you more, he'll be scanning them for one similarity that he can boast about.

"he's got my smile. see?"

loves playing with their hair and combing and styling it

also loves it when you all match unintentionally when going out

the type to play with the kids in the most unconventional ways when you're not looking

almost accidentally drops the baby at least once a week- i said ALMOST okay he's good at catching.

kids cling on to his long legs and he effortlessly walks like no big deal omgg

would even swing his legs like an amusement ride which might possibly earn a scream from you-

also once used the laundry basket as a rollercoaster for the kid. you can imagine how that ended. no living beings were harmed tho-

HE'S A FUN DAD OK

literally his kids are always running around him asking him to do sth fun with them or tell them jokes or play with him

teaches the kids the latest trends

makes dancing tik toks with them

he's actually also the super responsible dad, always dependable. you literally have nothing to worry about esp bc he can be serious when he needs to be

he allows the kids to take challenges, believing the kids need to grow at their own pace and that getting hurt is also a part of growing up

teaches them to be kind, to respect people, to always smile

goes on dates with them to the amusement parks, aquariums, carnivals etc and when they're older they go fishing or go-karting

Yeosang

(sincerely apologise for using a photo with alcohol in a post with babies BUT DOES HE NOT LOOK BABY HERE???)

the babiest of dads

googles whatever the baby does as if that will give him the answer

notices every little thing the baby does

follows instructions like a robot

forgets that the baby is actually a baby and they can't really do their stuff themselves so he has to do it for them-

like for example after a meal he clears the high chair and forgets he needs to help the baby off the chair until it wails LOL

is always worrying about what the baby is feeling esp when it is crying without a reason

always fusses about the little things bc he cares so much :')

sometimes you have to sit him down and tell him that it's okay if the baby is crying-

he even enjoys simply watching the baby esp when they do stupid stuff or play around with food

"that's disgusting but so adorable"

gets taught the latest trends by his kid but still ends up using them in the wrong contexts lmao

yeosang and the kid wailing about the mom on their way home until yeo takes the wrong turn and the kid glares at him and points to the right direction

yeosang and the kid in the shopping mall and yeosang gets lost

goes to the counter to pay but taps his pockets bc he can't find his wallet and the kid sighs loudly and hands it to him

yeosang taking his kid to the parent teacher meeting and he forgets HE'S the parent

he may be forgetful and zone out at times but he's actually very responsible. you never worry whenever you leave your kid with him and go out. you can depend on him <3

you'll see him mature as his kids grow up too, like you can literally see him learning fatherhood

doesn't mean they won't open dexter's laboratory when you're gone and clean up the mess before you come-

sees cute posts about lunchboxes with octopus sausage and seaweed characters on the rice but canNOT replicate it even after spending hours but the kids flaunt it like a masterpiece at their school <3 (loren you're so right for this)

his kids' friends WILL have a crush on yeosang. the teachers might too. how could you not??

his kids gon be the prettiest istg-

San

i'm sorry to break it to you but you'll have to take care of two babies <3

as loren said 'normal children learn behaviours from their parents. san learns behaviours from the baby.'

pretends to cry when the baby is crying so he can also receive hugs and kisses from you

he's actually the most responsive father ever, like he'll know what's actually happening with the kid instead of pretending to know

it's like he's connected to them on an astral level

so he's pretty much a natural caretaker

like he said, he knows how to give love

so he'll never make you feel less loved as well

he'll keep reassuring you how imp you are to him esp now that you're the mother of his child and he'll always be grateful to you for bringing this blessing into his life

but he also has his moments LMAO like i can just imagine him playing with the kid in the most babiest of manners

to the point the kid refuses to listen to you

the kids will always ALWAYS choose him whenever they're asked the 'who do you love more mom or dad' question

and even though that makes you pissed momentarily bc pls who wouldn't get pissed you find it super adorable how much your kids love their dad

safe place.

tells his kids early on what's good and what's bad. no compromises

teaches them when to be sorry and when to stand up for themselves

taekwondo together <3 he'll make them show off at family events or stuff and demand that the audience give good reactions otherwise he's gonna pout sooo hard

he'll make sure his kids don't laze around. chores? yes. exercise? yes. nap-time? necessary. homework? don't even dare to say no. play-time? HELL YES

teaches traditional games to his kids too and makes them interact with other kids to play instead of video games so early on

the video games are HIS okay they can't touch it until they grow up

kids go to him for help in school work and he'll sit there all zoned out wondering when the hell this got included in their syllabus

will refuse to give up until you catch him tired and scratching his head in confusion

"i'm pretty sure education gets tougher every year."

"whatever helps you sleep at nights san <3" LOL

loves spending time together, all of you, anywhere as long as you all are together <3

Mingi

9/10 times will cry when the baby cries

but also really good at taking care of them and it amazes him too

calms the baby down with the cutest most concerned face ever so he looks more baby than the baby

pretends to sleep when the baby wakes up crying in the middle of the night

until you poke his stomach and go 'don't you fucking dare' and he starts laughing helplessly

but then takes the reins and lets you sleep if you look too done <3

jokingly tries to gaslight you into thinking it's your turn to settle the baby but you bet you're keeping tabs too

but when he sees how tired you look, he'll never ever complain no matter how tired he may be himself. will even tuck YOU into bed

the type to sit in the lounge with some kid's show on with the kid itself and you give him snacks to feed the kid

but at some point he got a taste and now he's looking at the packaging and going 'this shit good' when it's actually some baby-friendly snack 😭

and then suddenly it's all gone and the kid is glaring at mingi with angry eyes 😭😭 and he's like pleasure is temporary my child-

but now he has his own fav baby snacks too.

does freestyle rapping about the misery of fatherhood LMAO

also does lame stuff like tapping on the baby's shoulder and when they turn to look at him he has his finger out so it pokes the baby's cheek like-

gets matching shades for him and the kid

hangs out with them a lot, even if it's inside

hears every story they have to tell but also they just looooveee to hear stories from him bc he's a good storyteller

even though half of the shit is made up but he pretends it actually happened-

"one time i saw your mom ugly crying in a shop. i asked her what the matter was. she saw me and fell in love instantly."

"wasn't it the other way?"

loves swinging his kids in his arms whenever he comes home and then you stand there all pouty and he runs after you-

can't scold kids to save himself. can never. always bursts out laughing whenever he glares at them. so you do that for him.

now you're the antagonist in the house

can't handle when his kids are being adorable like he'll just clutch his heart and pretend to faint

best father-kid dynamic bc he's the playful but responsible dad

Wooyoung

he's a natural at this come on

"i feel like he's more my sibling than my own child"

always has his baby in his arms to the point you have to snatch it from him bc you can see he's tired

takes care of everything- from bathing them to feeding them. he's so good at it too

you love him even more bc he may tease you to bits but you never thought he'd be a cooperative lovable menace too

talks to the baby in baby language and they actually hold conversations

and when you join he'll just make fun of you LOL

starts treating you like a baby too when you're tired and you're not sure you hate that you might actually start doing it on purpose too-

taught the kid the art to charm people so they're throwing random cheeky compliments around

like they'll go to a shop and the kid will compliment the shopkeeper and they'll be like omg so precious and hand freebies

and those freebies would be wooyoung's earnings btw aint no way the kid gon have those

will train a family of cutest loveable menaces :')

the chef dad

creates masterpiece lunchboxes for his kids that even the teachers are tempted to steal

i can just imagine the girl friend (also crush) of wooyoung's son at school having a big fat crush on wooyoung and wanting to marry him like come on😭😭

then the son gets super grumpy about it and woo sits him down and asks what's bothering him

then he'll teach him how to bake cookies and the son ends up sweeping the girl off her feet omgg

woo placing his hands over his kid's hands bc they're too small to properly hold the piping bag when they decorate cakes and cookies and cupcakes

them playing in the kitchen and throwing flour on each other and you come and look all smugly at woo bc yes you're gonna clean this mess later on

but you end up joining them :')

dolls up his kids and asks them to kiss him on both his cheeks before they leave

and you bet the kids love that routine

hugs. all the time. hugs.

makes sure to capture these moments for memories if you haven't already and he'll love looking back at these days <3

Jongho

best dad

makes sure he doesn't forget to take care of you as you take care of the baby :')

always gets surprised when the baby does sth new

priceless reactions from him, esp when the baby first says a comprehensible word or takes its first steps

always spreading his arms whenever he spots the baby so the baby can crawl/walk/run to him

swings them in the air and does those little throws

the strong dad. the one who's carrying the kids effortlessly- one on the shoulder, one under the arm, walking as if they weigh nothing

jongho's kid: hi i'm hungry

jongho: hi hungry, i'm dad

overuses every dumb dad joke ever to exist but still finds it super hilarious and sometimes you'll end up laughing along

"back in my days-"

"ah shit here we go again."

bc you know dad jokes aside he's actually a super funny guy when he wants to be

the type to team up with his kid to tease YOU

whispers shit in their ears like 'go pull out your mom's hairclip as revenge for her not letting us hang out in the snow with ice cream last night' when you're super occupied and gets a good laugh out of it

taps your shoulder and then looks away when you glare at him but ends up pointing at the kid like the kid's the one who did it-

when the two are a giggling mess it's hard to differentiate who's the actual kid from the parent

sings with his kids a lot. might vocally train them a bit too

road trips are gonna be so much more fun when everyone's singing at the top of their lungs

when his kid is older and starts to get school assignments that require some form of art like creating a model or designing a poster, his kid is definitely going to score an A because jongho can and WILL help and end up over-achieving LOL

will plan with his kids on days like valentine's or mother's day or anniversary, prepare to get serenaded by the lot

he involves them a lot in everything so they grow up super smart

loves doing stupid things with the kids too like he'll literally be the one following the kids at times

but you love it bc you never have to worry about anything with him ;-; <3 he's also super protective

unless there's a bug in front of you. then you're all on your own.

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yourlocaltrashpandaa · 1 year

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living together ~ monkey trio

{macaque, sun wukong, & mk x fem!reader}

++============++

Macaque

macaque started living at your place after the defeat of LBD and it was a weird adjustment for him

he’s not the type for a more domestic life but he loved you and didn’t want to leave you alone all the time

you were happy to have him there but you could tell he was struggling with the adjustment

mostly all the sounds, it irritated his ears

you do live in the city after all and you’re used to the sounds.

to help you got him a pair of noise-canceling headphones

you rarely see macaque without them which you don’t mind

the two of you exchanged small notes to each other

macaque finds it cute especially when you drawing things on the notes

you got blue and purple sticky notes for this

you like things that are color coded, it was one the charms that macaque liked about you

the first couple of days you spent together, macaque won’t sleep in the same bed with you

not that you minded, you loved macaque and respected his space since he’s rarely touchy with you mostly bc he’s not much of fan but also abandonment issues

but one night, you felt him slip into the bed from behind you, his arms wrapped around your waist, his face buried in your neck and his tail was curled around one of your ankles.

he likes your warmth and after that night, he’s gotten clingy with you

clingy to the point where he’s protective, like very protective

you’ve heard him hiss at people before

you started to think that your monkey boyfriend was half-cat

he loves your touch, you’ve heard him purr sometimes when you pet him when the two of you chill on the couch

you love have your emo monkey boyfriend in your home

Sun Wukong

after a lot begging from wukong, you finally gave in and moved in with him on Flower Fruit Mountain

he was a happy monkie and hugged you as soon as you showed up

“Peaches! You made it!”

“Hi, Wukong.”

wukong’s little monkeys were just as happy to see you as your monkey boyfriend

They took turns hugging you 😭

though you had your gripes with living on Flower Fruit Mountain, you found that it was quite peaceful living far away from the crowd city

wukong knew the stress you’ve experienced while living there so he thought if you lived with him you’d be able to get a sense of peace

you really took on a housewife persona which wukong was surprised by

he wanted to you to relax and let him do everything

yet you said otherwise

you like the idea taking care of household stuff also you want to make this monkey your husband

wukong didn’t stop you from doing what you wanted

when you cook, he’d stand behind you with his arms around your waist, his chin resting on your shoulder as his tail wagged behind him

“Thanks for everything, Peaches.”

he’s very flirty and rolls out compliments every so often and you don’t mind, they sometimes make you flustered but you’re so used to wukong’s antics they don’t effect you as much so you flirt back sometimes

It catches him off guard sometimes

sleeping in the same bed was easy for the two of you with you liking to cuddle and wukong being clingy

“I love you, sunshine”

“I love you too, monkey face.”

you and mk have talked about who would move into who’s place

But neither of you could come to an agreement on it

Look you wanted to live with mk yet his apartment seemed too small for the two you yet you lived on the other side of the city, yet your apartment was bigger than mk’s it was a bit inconvenient

After days of rating the pros and cons, the two of you settled on you moving in with mk

pigsy and mk helped you move most of your stuff to mk’s apartment (mostly clothes and other things like that) and your hamster

mk was happy to have you with him

He likes seeing you after a long day, sometimes he even forgets that you live there

an exhausted mk would sometimes stumble through the door, seeing you either on the couch or sitting on the bed in the bedroom, he’d flop down in your lap and rant about his day while you listened as you ran your fingers through his hair

you cook most of the time

you’ve been teaching him how to cook, yes he has blown up the kitchen before

mk did get embarrassed when said you’d like to sleep in the same bad as him

mk.exe has stopped working

you laughed at his reaction, and told him that he didn’t have to agree with it if he didn’t want to

he shook his head rapidly and said he doesn’t mind

he was really tense next to you until the both of you fell asleep and woke up almost on top of each other

you moving in with him was the best thing that happened to mk

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mysticmistral · 1 month

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Highly recommend AFK Journey’s you get amnesia, have hamsters, investigate arson, smite some wind, go on a date, crash a party, and probably more I’m just stuck.

You’ve got yourself, and call us Robin cause we’re a mage and got no memory. The game has character creation, though quite limited. Still good though.

We’ve got Valen who gives me Claude from FE3H vibes for some reason and a mysterious second sword and is a Lightbearer, the second recruit to your team and a good VA

We’ve got my favorite design in the game, Bryon, a Bird wielding Wilder who I pulled and has a great VA in my opinion

AFK Arena players will recognize Silvina, a Graveborn assassin who was my favorite Arena character next to Lucretia for some reason (IDK I just like her)

Every game needs a mysterious person tied to the protagonist, and you get Mirael, a flame sorcerer who calls us dear and has the best animations so far.

And also from Arena, Antandra, a dual sided spear and shield wielding Mauler who can make her own shield and also has a good voice.

There’s like, six or so Promo codes for free stuff, but if you like a game with artstyle, I recommend this one. It’s quite stylized and has a decent story. There is a small amount of heroes to summon, but it’ll probably increase as the game goes on.

#afk arena #afk journey #I’d give it 7.5 out of 10

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whatthebodygraspsnot · 4 months

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totally random and don't know if you've been asked this before, i've read your fics and drabbles, i absolutely love your voice in them, considering how you write Ian and Mickey so well, i'd give a penny for your thoughts about Mickey's lil bridezilla notebook. do you think it's full of collage pages? mostly text? magazine scraps? does he color code shit? ugh i love him sm 😩

oh my god i forgot the most important thing!!!!!!! did he ever let Ian have a complete sneak peek through it? cause i think he probably skimmed through it with Ian while the planning was on board, but Mickey probably stored it somewhere safe as a keepsake after the wedding....what if one day Ian just happens to find it and looks through it fondly and Mickey catches him on the act, oops, they have a talk about it, idk, Mickey having a lil notebook just does something to my fragile heart 🤧🤧

hello 😌 thank you for asking - i do actually have some thoughts on this, in the way that i think mickey's wedding notebook goes through several stages.

i think at its creation, it's more of a dump-book. mickey's at his stream-of-consciousness, hunting-and-gathering phase. there's no organization - no rhyme or reason - mickey is stressed and overwhelmed and he's just gluing shit right into that motherfucker, filling the pages as quickly as he can turn them. he doesn't really have a Vision yet - he just knows he's gotta prepare for it, especially since ian doesn't seem too interested in making decisions.

come to jesus moment. mickey slaps down a stack of pictures he's cut out and goes to start adding them, only to realize he has no blank pages left. he's filled the whole thing. that can't be right, can it? it's a big notebook, and the stuff he just cut out for it is real good shit so he's gotta make room. gotta start from page one. gotta thumb through it and pull a 'wtf' face because he doesn't even like some of this shit? why'd he put it in here? tulips??? who did that! okay, time to pump the fucking brakes.

paring down. re-evaluation. ian walks into the living room one night and mickey's cross-legged in the middle of a sea of ripped papers. like some sort of hamster. ian thinks perhaps divorce is on the table, only to come closer and realize mickey's cutting shit out and pasting it into a new notebook, the glue stick caught between his teeth like a cigar (Alternate Title: Ian's Come To Jesus Moment.)

notebook 2.0 is born. there's significantly less...everything. the Vision is starting to come together. debbie gives him these little color tab bitches that he can stick between the pages so he knows where to put things. Music. Food. Flowers. etc. mickey sits down with ian again and flips through it, getting his thoughts on different things. out comes the big red marker - circling - crossing out - starring. he can see ian trying to sneak closer looks across the table, but mickey's grown very attached. it's his hopes and dreams in here, motherfucker! ian can look at it later. after he finds the chiavaris.

That Bitch. this baby is in her final form. mickey knows what he wants and knows he's got the power to haggle, secure, or steal it all when he's got his notebook tucked under his arm. she's also good and solid when he smacks lip over the head with her after he makes a passing comment about being a groomzilla. she is everything.

when he does finally see his notebook again after many years, it's because ian is thumbing through it, this teary, fond look in his eyes as he sits in a sea of boxes. mickey doesn't know if he should be embarrassed or proud or what. a lot of their wedding day ended up shifting on its axis for a ton of fucked up reasons, so as gorgeous as she is, a lot of her didn't actually get to see the light of day.

but ian is innnn lovvvve (aaaaat laaaaast my looove has come alonnnggg). so much so that for their ten year anniversary, mickey walks into their little get-together and immediately recognizes a ton of the details. like they've jumped out of the pages of his notebook and into reality ten years later. ian is a sneaky fucker! and mickey has excellent taste.

and he's just really glad that he cut out that disgusting tulip arrangement in his first notebook purge.

#asks #gallavich #one thing about mickey is he needs a plan

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valve3nthusiast · 4 months

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oh that post you made a while back about using decepticon pussy as a water bottle got me thinking so hard

so like, imagine a con who gets captured and they're expecting the usual; torture, imprisonment in a cell, the normal deal when one gets put into custody by the other side. they've heard stories about the autobots being a bit kinky than what most cons would have thought, but this bot for sure isn't expecting to be strung up in the mess hall, an energon dispenser routed through their systems and just sort of left there, like some weird decoration

i'm thinking of one of those water bottles you use to feed like a hamster just sticking out of their valve for the autobots to use whenever they need to refuel. hell maybe they've even got tiddies and one of the medics rerouted a few of their internal fuel lines to get them up and running, so now bots have a choice between the valve spout or energon straight from the tit

ough i'm thinking about a prewar high class party where some poor gutter mech (maybe drift~) spread eagle on a table, with little treats and snacks spread all across their frame and they just have to sit there, not moving as they're basically treated as just a piece of furniture. maybe the person who hired (or captured depending on how dubcon you wanna make this situation) the newly serving bot has used really pretty chains, covered in engraved flowers and crystal clusters to decorate their new platter and maybe they've even forced the mech's panels open, with a little container of sauce shoved in there for extra flavour

this is less like a food kink and more of a kink for being strung up and ignored, a mech being treated as nothing more than a piece of furniture for others to ignore

-burnt ice anon

Hello anon. this is a direct bullseye to my kinks. are you perhaps a mind reader

Hnggg I'm imagining they take the energon dispensary and route a fuel line to the top of the cons valve, and then seal his slit shut around a spigot... that way the autobots can have their plain rations flavored with his yummy lubricant

Of course his node and spike are uncovered, the autobots play with them to get sweeter fuel before they open the tap and release some of the pressure in the poor 'con's valve... an autobot that likes their fuel as sweet as possible, rubbing his node until he overloads, so they can get the most lubricant in their fuel...

A medic got the code to get his refineries up and running, now theyre sore and overful, hanging heavy down his chest... 'bots will squeeze one of his tits to squirt some frothy, milky refined energon into a cube, but some skip that and suck straight from his nozzles instead...

Also I love imagining cybertronian noblemechs doing kinky fucked up shit... I will gladly jump at the opportunity to put Drift in that scenario.

Completely stripped of his nasty dirty armor, bound flat to the table with nothing but jewelry and treats to hide his protoform... I love imagining stuffing his valve with food, yeah. Maybe there's a little tray of rust sticks next to him, and you can either swirl it in his valve or gently dip it into his drooling transfluid slit...

Maybe it's a party game to have a "serving platter" with an array coated in candy, the goal of the game to see who can lick it clean without making a mess by letting the platter overload...

#valveplug #mine #crossfaction #sticky fluids #drift #3nthusiasts inbox

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st4rc4t · 2 months

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hasan piker x weed smoking reader hcs

disclaimer! i do not condone underage marijuana usage!! this is just something silly for ppl who do/have smoked weed before. if ur under 21 in the united states don’t do it !!!

cw: marijuana usage, friends to lovers sorta idk the situation is weird, autistic coded reader ? it kinda just happens, semi pining, gn!reader

wc: 1.1k+

a/n: just me and my 3 weed smoking gfs

most of his friends in the youtube/twitch scene also smoke weed so he doesn’t really care

he smokes occasionally but only at night to help wind down a little bit

he doesnt mind the smell but he really hates when his clothes and hair smell like it

so when he’s around you make sure you’re either outside or blowing it out of a window

you never smoke inside his house

he didn’t ask you not to, you just assumed he wouldn’t like it

he doesnt and it makes him blush a little at ur consideration

whenever you get high and he doesn’t, he never says “omg ur so high” while ur trying to talk

cus like . yeah obviously that was the point ! and its not like ur completely different while high, just a little floatier and it takes you a minute to get thru ur sentences

but you talk about pretty much the same stuff and he loves talking to you

and u laugh a lot he likes that too

dont tell anyone tho

you looove getting high with him its such a special treat

ull be gathering ur paraphernalia to take out on the patio and he wanders out of his stream room looking like the sad hamster

he sees you getting ready, getting a bottle of juice and such and asks if he can join u

gasp of course he can !!!!!

asking how fucked up he wants to get so you know the best method of smoke delivery

he wants to sleep Good tonight so indica in the bong it is !

he’s nervous ab the bong so u bring out a bowl too incase he gets cold feet

he watches you get comfy in your seat outside, a comfortable warmth from the california setting sun

arranging everything ready on the table

“you look like a tweaker”

“im gonna make you a tweaker if ur not careful”

he laughs but he keeps watching you carefully pick out a healthy portion from the large bud you have, pushing it into the prongs of your grinder and twisting the two pieces against each other

he watches you pour the contents of a reusable water bottle into the large glass piece, eyeing the level of water

he watches you stop and put it to your lips, taking a pretend hit and making sure the water level is good

he watches you carefully pack the ground up flower into both bowl pieces, using your fingers to pat it level and dusting the excess back into the grinder with each one

you notice him staring but dont say anything until you’re already done

you make him an offering, bong and bowl in each respective hand. eyebrows raised as if to say, “which are we feeling?” but when he continues staring at the contents of your hands, you actually speak.

“dude are you already high, whats going on?” you laugh cautiously, genuinely a little worried but keeping it light hearted. he seems to snap out of it at your voice.

his eyes dart around for a second as he reenters his surroundings, chuckling when your word’s finally register, “no, yeah- sorry… really long day today,” his words fizzle out as he goes along. you cant help but feel bad, you dont know how he deals with streaming sometimes. you also feel weird about giving him a mind altering substance while he already seems spaced out.

setting the pieces down safely on the table, you look at him seriously before speaking, “are you sure you wanna do this? you’re kinda out of it,” you’re hard trying not to sound condescending, but you doubt he can read your tone that well right now anyway.

he smiles the most minuscule amount and looks away, but you see it. “yeah, im sure,” he sighs out gently before continuing, “i need to empty my brain,” he finishes by looking back to you with already tired eyes. you nod in understanding, relishing in knowing exactly how to fix his problem.

picking up the little glass bowl and a lighter, you hand both to him. they instantly look tiny in his hand and you’re not sure how he’s gonna actually do this. after realising you gave him green hit, you remind him to take a small hit. he just rolls his eyes sarcastically and scoffs, like of course he would, but you both know he would’ve blown a lung.

you watch him fumble with the glass, trying to get a good grip that covers the carb and wont burn his hand when he lights it

he eventually gets it and takes a little corner hit

a bit bigger than he was expecting tho so he does that thing where u cough the smoke out

just awful btw

u give him some water hes fine but boy does he love to complain

u just laugh at him and take ur own hit

breathing in deep, holding it for a second, and letting it go watching it escape into the open air

when he sees other people smoke it usually feels more rushed and energetic, like they were trying to ingest as much thc in as little time as possible

but you take your time. gathering everything and getting comfortable, settling into the ritual of the action. you take your time and let yourself feel it, you take your time and make sure he’s fully prepared before offering him anything

oh no he likes you !

he does end up hitting the bong but like the smallest baby hit so it doesn’t even count

he is sooo silly when hes high loves to laugh

he will def devolve into political rants if you let him, but you’re pretty good at making him laugh and redirecting him when hes like this

bc he smoked an indica this time his eyes are even more droopy than they were before and you can tell he’s getting tired

you clean up and follow him back inside amd he goes completely baby mode at the sight of kaya sleeping on the couch

petting her and pressing his face into her fur, going on and on about how soft she is

you laugh and sit on the other end of the big sectional covered in pillows and blankets

when hes done melting into kaya he sits down next to u with his arm around the back of the couch

real smooth .

it works 1000%

watching smth stupid like family guy (genuinely my fave show while high i will not elaborate)

chilling until he decides to go to bed at like 8:30

he convinces u to sleep on the couch bc ur both too high to drive and he would freak out at the thought of u in an uber rn

okay i have to be done i basically wrote a oneshot in the middle bye bye

#hasabi posting #hasanabi #hasanabi x reader #hasan piker x reader #hasan piker #my writing

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cocomochicakes · 6 months

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ASKING NON-BG3 FRIEND WHAT THEY THINK ABOUT THE COMPANIONS

So I asked my friend, who has NEVER played BG3, what they think about the characters based on watching my gameplay and clips from TikTok and this is what they said:

ASTARION

Moody brat, except he’s really sweet sometimes? But still a brat. Very hungry and wants to use Tav as a capri sun. He’s also a chaotic goose. Goostarian.

KARLACH

BEST GIRL BEST GIRL BEST GIRL! Heart of gold (and metal…and fire…) She’s a bimbo Barbarian, what’s not to love???? Also her broken horn is so cool. She’s so punk, I just wanna kiss her so bad.

HALSIN

Big horny bear man. I guess the dick is bigger in bear form??? Can Tav even fit that inside them??? Everybody loves Astarian imitating Halsin “enjoying the freedom of nature’s gifts.” Idk, Halsin scares me for some reason…? Maybe it’s the horndog thing. Horn…bear…?

WYLL

Nobody talks about this guy, so I have no idea who he is. Just your average Joe warlock who just wants a cup of coffee, I guess. I think he’s a monster hunter, though? He and Astarian sass each other.

LAE'ZAEL

Frog lady with a tiny nose. She wants to be dominated by Tav. I used to think she was ugly, but I actually think she’s cool looking in her own way. Makes the silly “CHUHK” sound with her tongue. People ship her with Shadowheart…?

SHADOWHEART

EMO EMO EMO!! She comes across as bratty to me. I saw a little bit of her story, and I think it’s cool that she defied her god, but yeah. Sucks to be abandoned by Mommy.

GALE

I heard somebody say once the boy likes to mansplain, so Gale left a sour taste in my mouth after that. Uhhh people say he’s autistic, too? In my friend’s play through, he had electric boots and was standing in ankle-deep water, and then went on to talk about books or something…? Also he’s the guy you meet in the beginning and you can slap his hand. I think that’s funny. His god groomed him, though, so that’s no good. Um…yeah, I think Gale standing in water with electric boots talking about books kinda sums up his character for me.

MINTHARA

I thought she was the Drow with the tainted blood, but she’s not. To recruit her, you gotta kill kids, and is it worth it? Some might say yes. I say that we lose Karlach for it, so no. It’s cool that she thanks you for not killing her. Gotta be some good angst there. I feel like most people just kill the Tieflings without thinking, so she’s probably a second play through kind of character.

☆☆BONUS☆☆

JAHEIRA

My friend said she’s coded Hispanic, so now I just imagine her making tacos and burritos in camp for the crew. (Is that racist…? Is it racist if I think she scolds people by hitting them with her shoe?) Mom of the camp, as told by my friend. Elder milf mommy elf. She can hit me with her shoe and I’d thank her and put it back on for her, and I hate feet.

MINSC

Burly Barbarian-looking dude with…a hamster…? I admire the ability of BG3 to make a barbarian with a hamster named Boo, and also make him attractive enough that people would want to romance him. Can you romance him? I feel like BG3 is just a dating sim with extra steps, so he’s *gotta* be dateable, right? Idk, I’d recruit him. I wanna pet his hamster.

#baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #bg3 headcanons #bg3 companions #astarion #gale of waterdeep #gale dekarios #gale #halsin #wyll #shadowheart #lae'zel #karlach #minthara #minsc and boo #minsc #jaheira

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serialadoptersbracket · 2 months

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Round 2, Match 18: Aphmau vs. Agent Washington

Submitted kids:

Aphmau: Levin, Malachi, Yip (attempted), Lilith-Garnet, Alina

Agent Washington: The entire red and blue squads

Propaganda under the cut!

Aphmau:

1. “She has one child dropped off at her doorstop early on and then decides to adopt every mysterious child she finds. Admittedly she did give Yip to a better home since she thought he'd do better with a werewolf dad but she did bring that child home with every intention to raise him as her own. She found Malachi and was like "hmm? Scary ghost child who shows everyone their worst fear uncontrollably? Sounds like he needs a mom!" She's also a serial animal adopter. It's like half canon that she adopted three cats named meowki, meowki, and meowki II, a dolphin, a hamster named Sean Connery, and a number of dogs I believe was close to eight. I haven't really mentioned Lilith because I don't know what to say about her other than ✨dragon baby✨”

2. “Ok so i haven't watched this series in awhile so my memories are kind of blurry, but Levin was put on her door set i believe and she adopted him, then there was a ghost child named Malachi, who was sad and lonely and so she adopted him, and there Lilith, was a baby she found a in a cave I believe ? And I'm very much blanking on what happened with Yip. My memories may not be the best for her this but she deserves to be in the bracket”

Agent Washington:

“They literally picked him up like a wet cat out of the snow (LITERALLY) and he was like “f-ck I guess I gotta look after these guys now” and then like commits to dying for all of them. He’s so tired dad coded like all he’s got are a bunch of kiddie leashes and fraying sanity”

#aphverse #mcd #minecraft diaries #aphmau #rvb #agent washington #red vs blue #serial adopters bracket #round 2 #tumblr tournament #tumblr polls

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intheholler · 2 months

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Do you have any traits that you think are vital/you’d like to see more of in Appalachian characters?

I’m writing a fantasy story (that I dream of making into an animated film) whose main character is an Appalachian-coded werewolf woman. I’ve been working on her story for a while, and while she was always from Appalachia in my head, she wasn’t Appalachian until I started following you, not really. I want to make sure I’m capturing the beautiful spirit of Appalachian folks with her and the people around her. She’s selfless to the point of personal damage, deeply, deeply compassionate, and smart as a whip. She’s also a little ruthless and morally utilitarian, which means she does some bad things, but her whole thing is that she always acknowledges that the people she hurts are people who don’t deserve it.

Apologies if this is like, weird, I just want to thank you for helping me flesh out a character who is so near and dear to my heart. Hope you have a nice day!

hi, this absolutely is not weird. actually it kinda made me wanna cry (in a good way).

it's been a busy morning & afternoon and i am drained so i'm worried i won't give this the right response bc brain is currently hamster on wheel.

first...

"...while she was always from Appalachia in my head, she wasn’t Appalachian until I started following you, not really."

i felt really warm reading that. like wow?? that i could be that much of a positive influence on perceptions my home or like that i could make that kind of impact just by talking about my experiences, those of which i used to be so ashamed of..

ok actually yeah got misty typing that. lol. aaaa okay.

to the point of your question-i would like to see more of acceptance as a trait.

people always equate us with hate and intolerance, but that has not been my exclusive experience. yes there are queerphobic racists here, clearly i do not downplay that here on this blog.

but there are queerphobic racists everywhere. everyone acts like they are all solely concentrated in appalachia/the southeast, and that that's the only kind of people we are allowed to be. incorrect!

im not saying we're innocent obviously. growing up we were constantly checking each other's casual racism and prejudices.

but like, that's the thing. most of us didn't/don't wanna be the way we was raised. we didn't actually feel that way. we were just taught that we should, and deep in the hollers all you find are echo chambers.

we are a very "you tend to your business and ill tend to mine" kind of people. we don't wanna bother nobody and we don't wanna be bothered.

so, characters who keep each other in check when something ugly slips, or a character who might have to originally confront bias/prejudice when meeting new people, but who does so quickly and lends aid without question, would be pretty realistic.

and honestly really fucking refreshing lol

#asks #Appalachia #appalachian culture

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genderfluid-carmen-sandiego · 21 days

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Human to Animal headcanons 1: Carmen Sandiego

El Topo, Le Chevre and Tigress r self explanatory

Carmen- a fox, I would say a sheep bc of her code name but I just feel a fox is more suiting bc she's sneaky. Also her hair kinda red

Player- a deer, idk bc of he's small size n kinda more ig self keeping demeanor it seems fitting

Ivy & Zach- Dogs, specifically labradors. Bc more or less how the hair is, and for their loyal yet energetic style

Shadowsan- snow leopard, badass animal, plus they're known to be rather isolated and go on their own

Coach Brunt- Bear. I mean, how can she NOT be one???

Countess Cleo- a peacock ngl, specifically the Opal peacock! Just based on looks it seems to go better with her fashionable design

Dr. Bellum- a hamster, just kinda a demeanor thing idk how to explain it tbh I don't have much an imagination for her,,,,

Maelstrom- molerat.

Crackle- fennec fox! He's sly like Carmen tho honestly like Carmen it's a hair color thing, fennec's being more brown n such

Paper star- a mouse, more bc of how her hair looks, plus she's kinda like quiet in a way but in the sense u can't hear her coming. Spooky!!

Mimebomb- duck. That's it. No explanation

That's all!! Feel free to suggest fandom's n I'll do em if I know em! If I don't know em then ehhh I'll go on appearance :3

#homepage #where in the world is carmen sandiego #carmen sandiego #shadowsan #graham crackle #ivy carmen sandiego #zach carmen sandiego #player carmen sandiego #vile academy #coach brunt #dr bellum #countess cleo #maelstrom #guh #autusm 👍#special interest #animals #ahhhhh

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crookedkryptonitebeliever · 1 month

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CKB hear me out. Haters will say it's fake but ....... blanche youngest child. The Victorian maid garb? He's tired of being in the shadows of those before him and is trying to set his own identity. Extreme violence? A big ol temper tantrum and cry for attention. I dare say i would lean on him being youngest child just because Lev fits the disaster middle child ALL too well 😮‍💨.

I see why some will say Lev as the youngest but i feel like he's suuuuch a middle kid like, even if he's stupid, he'd having a good time and that's all he cares about. I feel like youngests are actually more deceitful and tricky wheras middle kids are pretty true to themselves and more easygoing? Like them youngest kids are used to sneaking around and just so cunning, showing different faces (not unlike blanche who does a 180)

Like blanche, yves can also fit all 3 perfectly. He does kinda seem like the overstressed, overworked, will nag out of love, can never relax, will shoulder responsibility for you eldest child (i feel like eldest children also have a really clean aesthetic? Middle kids are either cozy wear or pop the Fuck off. And youngest kids are always flashy but in their own way and my god if that isnt blanche 💀)

Also i feel like eldest kids (yves) have a great fear or failure and losing things so theyre lowkey control freaks. Youngest kids (blanche) are oddly possessive and entitled like they think the last slice of pizza is their god given right. And middle kids (lev) are so used to losing things that they get obsessive over the things they do have, and a bit pathetic abt it if they feel it slipping away.

Youngest kid blanch really does seem like a big brat (but who cares) to me. Like he sees reader as his dead pet hamster that he accidentally squeezed to death trying to hug it but he refuses to believe it's dead so he keeps leaving food out for it and stroking it. Middle kid Lev sees you as a cute hamster and buys you cool wheels and a rolling ball and toys and sleeps with you in his bed. Eldest Yves will not allow anything to happen to pet hamster so he has a seperate temperature controlled room for it, homemade pellets, probably wipes hammies ass after it poops and everything.

This was just my random musing though and im excited to see what you end up making the order!!

Also i think i was ur 🐰 anon and i used to send in all those theories for language barrier LOL. Ummmmm the bunny thing *totally* didn't have to do with Lev, so, uh, don't tell Blanche, my latest hyperfixation 🤭 (or Cyprus because goddamn-)

🐰 anon

🐰 anon also said: Oh! Also feel like blanche would be a lot younger than the other two. Like modern au or whatever if they were all together, yves moved out when blanche was a kid (because he was independent) lev was never home bc he was always out and just kinda ended up living w one of his friends (never 'officially' moved out but he's living elsewhere) and followed the party life, and blanche was probably raised and spoiled by a family elder, making him feel like an 'old soul born in the wrong generation'. But hold onnn i didnt know therewas a blanche pt 2, lemme go read that and see if it changes things LOL 🐰 anon

🐰 anon also said: no blanche is actually so middle/youngest child coded it's insane bc i refuse to let go of middle child lev (actually i need to give bunny a reread before that too, and ofc more content on him when it comes out lol) but brooooo them youngest kids be weird as FUCK like, smth abt blanche feels like he's playing dressup, pretending and trying so hard to be this old fashioned adult gentleman, meanwhile yves actually is more calculated, composed and knows what to do for his shit. I actually initially thought of yves being the youngest but i feel like blanche being youngest fits so much better imo. Like blanche is just here to do his own shit, he's a bit selfish, and pushes for hinself. Yves puts his responsibility first and pushes for reader. Plus yves has that blonde mom in target drinking a coffee doing 3 hours of shopping in 12 minutes before her next hot yoga class and thats soooo eldest child coded. Idk something abt blanche as a person (not a character) seems so underdeveloped and child like in a disturbing yet innocent way? 🐰 anon

🐰 anon also said: "unromancable, unfuckable weirdo." No im sorry Blanche is actually the youngest child Bunny anon

Holy fuckin shit bunny anon always comign in with a banger , yess that's what im talking about them tasty brain chews i like i like

shid man like u really lay out their vibes and everything and even imagined them in modern AUs , presented evidence and cited your source like what the fuck this is such a good analysis like damn bro i fr appreciate the enthusiasm

Like all the stuff you sair fr made sense even to someone who has no siblings, its as if i had those little shits living in the same house as me and i observed the dynamic, like yeah damn Yves really fit the oldest child

Its really fitting cause if you think about it, they're all like centuries old or whatever and both Yves and Leveret are pretty youthful looking with no grey hairs- they went on their own quests to preserve their looks, Whereas Blanche is considered to be the most unkempt out of the three with his salt and pepper hair growing uncontrollably to the back of his knees, no manicures just natural long nails but he's still considered youthful cause ykno 50 year old looking man vs his actual 5 million year old age , but it just shows that he doesn't care about looking youthful as much as his older brothers

i notice the older siblings from other relatives and friends they tend to looksmaxx more than the younger ones. and they try to keep up trends, like Yves and Leveret is pretty modern whereas Blanche is fuckin ancient with his stuff, mannerisms and dressing up

and yes he is ironically the most immature (as in childlike) of them all, even tho leveret is like spontaneous and has his slipups, but damn bunny anon like ur analysis is always bangers like what the hell bro i love them and i love you

#yandere oc #yandere #yandere x reader #yandere male #oc yves #oc leveret #oc blanche #yandere oc x reader #male yandere oc x reader #yandere ocs

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sabrondabrainrot · 2 months

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I forget I can just ramble and rant my thoughts!

I try to focus on sharing just my art but I also do writing and try to have a bit of a critical mind when it comes to media I consume.

Now that it has been a few months since I watched all of TMNT 12 I do have some thoughts and opinions and kind of want to just ramble about it before I forget, in an informal manner.

I at first really liked it, it was the second TMNT show I watched after Rise, now that I've been watching the 87 and 03 shows my opinions on 12 did change just a bit but I still do like it!

Literally all the turtles are my son's now. Especially Leonardo (he's blue coded so-). I just think they're so cute and neat!!!

I'm going to put thoughts to spoiler stuff of 12 so if you plan to watch the show then don't click beyond this point!

🐢💙🐢♥️🐢🧡🐢💜

So in the last season of TMNT 12 it kind of feels like all the scrapped ideas or random plots that couldn't be fit into the prior seasons were put in this one? I really like the new op it gives of Cowboy Bebop vibes. The op song change is really nice to because I never really looked the tmnt 12 op song before.

However, the plots feel all over the place? There's a mini ark where they're jumping through time meeting Halloween monsters and then another ark where Mikey defeats Satan? Then we get another really tiring ark that's this implied alternate madmax fury road parody that is honestly so depressing? Donnie is just dead.

Which btw, the show likes killing ppl off for dramatic effect. They killed Master Splinter three times and had Mikey and Donnie get scattered to atoms on two separate occasions. I should also mention Leo was in a coma for 3 months with no IV or anything and he woke up relatively fine.

Anyways, going into the last season and stuff leading up to it... They kind of ended with the 87 turtles and the 12 boys finding new passion and inspiration from teaching the 87 boys. I didn't really vibe with it because it just made the 87s the butt of the joke and made them out to be incompetent silly little guys.

They ARE silly little guys but the thing is they're not incompetent. The 87 boys have done some insanely incredible things even when unarmed. Especially when unarmed. I actually think the angle of finding a new way to help people as a means to end the series on an inspired note is fine, the 87 boys even carried on the will and told Bebop and Rocksteady they can be more than Shredder's mutant henchmen. It is very cute and wholesome. I just think they could have maybe done it differently?

Why not set up for them to teach Chi arts? The turtles of 87 don't have any mystical abilities and it would have been interesting to do a set up like that? There are ways to write the finale without just dumping on the original source.

Focusing back on the ending of 12, we also leave on a seriously alarming note. It's just a big mixed bag. After Master Splinter went to run on the hamster wheel in the sky, Leonardo was handed the reigns of the family. He was told "You're the teacher now Leonardo. You're the father. Look after your brothers" and Splinter then willingly walked into his own death. I think the writers maybe thought this was amazing and inspirational or something but I found it incredibly messed up? We start tmnt 12 on all 4 boys birthday. Meaning Splinter himself considers them all to be the same age. And since the series was running they haven't on screen celebrated a birthday and from the implied weather changes most of the seasons 1-4 seem to take place over just a year??? We don't get a definitive timeline (or I'm a bad audience and didn't notice).

So one can only assume Master Splinter was telling his...15 year old son to be the father to his other 15 year old children.

Why do I bring this up at all? After Leonardo takes over the family and he KILLS shredder they go into this rushed cult demon resurrection arc that culminates in the classic dead walk the earth and Mikey defeats Satan. In this arc we meet a ghost splinter who does not even go to see his kids, he just helps Casey and April. But throughout and the lead up to this we have moments of Leo having conversations with what we can perceive as Sensei's ghost in the dojo.

But the climax of the arc cements splinters ghost has not once visited his son's.

So Leonardo is quite literally having full on conversations, in the dojo for his brothers to hear, with a hallucination of his dead dad. He's coping this way. His family does nothing about this.

Tmnt 2012 has the worst Splinter. He ignored his son's and chose favorites. He told Leonardo to die (season 1 finale). He calls Mikey dumb and insights the others to do it too. He told Raph his anger makes him exactly like Shredder and never elaborates or teaches him how to better work through his issues. And he straight up calls Donnie useless.

None of that is even an exaggeration. Adding context just makes it worse.

Here's a list:

Do you know the turtles are the equivalent of helicopter raised homeschool boys? They've never stepped foot outside of the lair except at the start of ep 1.

They learn ALL of their lessons from old shows and cartoons. The show writers even sometimes use the cartoons to set up the theme of the episodes!

When Leonardo rescues Mikey he pats him on the head to comfort him.

Literally almost all of their ninja weapons have hidden weapons. I love it I wish I saw more of them using them.

Michelangelo is the family chef because somehow none of the rest have any life skills. Not even Splinter (explains so much).

They all have such cute shape language. I love bean pole Donnie, blocky buff Raph, perfect pear Leo, and round freckled Mikey.

They also now have unique eye colors. I love their eyes. Donnie with his big beautiful brown eyes (sometimes they look red). Raph with his acid green stare into your soul eyes, they look like they would glow like mako eyes in ff7. Mikey with bright blue eyes all big and round. And then Leo with the cunning dark blue eyes!

I just want to pinch their cheeks and kiss their foreheads and give them hugs.

Also, Leo is so affectionate to kids and his brothers??? My heart??? Couldn't take it??? He just randomly hugs them?? He had a tea party??? He wore a pink feather boa? The way he just immediately held baby Miwa??? Too good. Too good. He's such a good big bro.

Raph is also such a soft guy. Like yes he's a Butthead that beats up his brothers and takes every single violent urge out on Leo when he's even minorly inconvenienced but he does learn to do better. He helps Leo a lot and he even is there for the others a lot too.

Raphael also does art and seems to like fine arts.

Raph, like Leo, is a resident baby man. He loved tiny helpless creatures. He had a pet turtle he loved with his entire being and then later on adopted a space alien baby turtle that he also loved with his entire being.

I love Donnie in this, his cute little tooth gap, his gentle demeanor, the fact he'd rather be in the lab than training. I feel bad for him tho cause he clearly wants Splinter and Leo's approval with his inventions and efforts but very rarely gets it (Leo is the only one to really praise him and get what he does). He's also a good team player but he has so much stress and no confidence.

Donnie needs a big ol hug.

Mikey is so cute. But he is so weird. Why did they write girly pop collecting underwear. Why did they have him cannibalize a mutant pizza man? They do the most random things with Mikey. I like that he avidly tries cheering ppl up. He tries so hard for his bros. He's just a sweet little guy. I wish they did more with the baby bro.

Mikey should have kept his lightning powers.

They fight a lot but all the brothers love each other. I think they're just stressed and cooped up too much.

I like drama tho it's juicy when they argue.

I read on the wiki that Donnie is supposed to be canon OCD and Mikey canon ADHD and it makes so much sense in the show.

I really like all their voices. I miss Leo's first voice he was so dorky and sweet. The new voice is all sad and serious. Raph sounds perfect. I like Donnie's voice but instead of him always yelling why not have him do the low angry science rant because that's a good time. I like Mikey's voice he sounds like a high pitched beast boy.

But despite the occasionally baffling writing choices of the show I still like it. It's entertaining in the same way as a telenovela or kdrama. They literally have a plot where one of the turtles falls in love with his secret half sister. Something I've seen in telenovelas and kdramas.

2012 tmnt makes a great dogblooded drama.

I think the CGI art can get pretty bad at times but other times it looks great. The music is pretty good and I really like the voice cast. I actually totally see why so many people like this show but I definitely don't think it's the best one. From what I've seen thus far, I think the 2003 TMNT show might actually be a masterpiece. Better than Avatar the Last Airbender levels of masterpiece (not a competition just giving an example of another show I find monumental).

That's it, that's the rant, thanks for reading!

Btw if any one has any good 12 fic recs pls hand them over. I need 12 hurt comfort, or fem Leo, or transfem Leo, or anything introspective, or just anything with a fun plot. Pls I'm dying here send fics.

Thank you :)

#brainrot #teenage mutant ninja turtles #cartoon #tmnt #tmnt 2012 #12 leo #12 raph #12 mikey #12 donnie #rant #thoughts #these are my opinions #I really like tmnt #i can't stop thinking about tmnt #maybe a bit introspection #rambles #headcanons #i love them your honor

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