#an event where everything is the exact same and i really need that | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ikeuverse · 2 months

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MAKE OFFICIAL — l.heeseung

PAIRING: dad!heeseung x stepmom!reader GENRES: fluff, slight angst WC: 5.2k+

WARNINGS: a bit of discussion, mention of bruising and blood, mention of food, gently suggestive at the end.

NOTES: honestly can't explain the amount of requests i've had for part two. i tried to put together a bit of everything... i thought of something a bit more distressing, but with a child in the story my pedagogical heart softened, so i didn't get something as distressing as that (thank goodness)!!! i hope you enjoy it.

part 1 | masterlist

"Seriously, I need to make this really official" Heeseung sighed, drinking some of his beer and placing the mug on the bar table.

Friday was the day to drink with the guys and talk as much as they could without the girls being around. And that subject was ideal for him to broach with the guys.

Looking ahead and noticing the attentive gazes of his best friends, he knew that this silence wouldn't last long, and besides, Jay was already finishing another sip of his drink so he could answer.

"Let me get this straight" the boy wiped his lips off any traces of alcohol, glancing at Jake and Sunghoon, then fixed his gaze on Heeseung who was sitting in front of him "You want to make the relationship you're having with my sister official?"

"Yes" Heeseung replied.

Jay remained silent for a while longer, choosing to take another sip of his beer.

"After more than a year you've been together?" Heeseung knew that the emphasis was ironic on Jay's part, and judging by the looks on the faces of the other two seated, he knew they were thinking the same thing too.

"I know, but it's just that there's never been a request, you know?"

"Do you want to ask y/n to be your girlfriend officially?" Sunghoon asked him. Heeseung nodded in agreement, playing with the stem of his beer mug without facing any of his friends this time.

"Dude, you made it official a long time ago" Jake laughed a little "You two live together, share the care of Aimi, and treat each other like married couples. Do you know what that is?"

Looking at it this way, Heeseung could tell that they had been official for a long time. He decided to trust what he felt from the day he kissed you for the first time in the living room of his parent's house, where you showed that you wanted to be with him and, above all, seemed to want to take care of Aimi as much as he did.

Heeseung was right. Little by little he introduced you to the little one's life, like simple things: picking her up from school, having dinner sometime at Heeseung's apartment. Aimi even cried one night when you said you'd go home and come back the next day. In conclusion, that was the first night you slept at Heeseung's apartment, wearing one of his t-shirts with Aimi's arms around you at a slumber party in the living room.

It was only a matter of time – or routine, as you both liked to think – that you picked up some clothes and left them at Heeseung's apartment. Or that you went to pick Aimi up from school because her father was leaving work late.

This brought you closer to his daughter. It brought you even closer as a couple. And neither of you could answer when the exact day was that you moved into his apartment. Neither of you could say when you started bathing Aimi and waiting for Heeseung on the sofa, to have dinner, read a story, and sleep as a family.

His friends were right, it all became even more official as he thought about the events of the last year. You never considered leaving him because he spent time with his daughter, as others had told him. You kept your promise by spending more time with her than her father did. The two of you even established things together for her upbringing, and you didn't even know how to tell Heeseung that the role of mother was filling your heart with joy.

It wasn't something to think about, nor did he think he'd have someone under his own roof playing mother to his daughter. But while you were there doing everything without a hint of effort, with a smile on your face and sometimes even tears in your eyes at the little girl's achievements, or even in moments of fever or something. He knew he had made the right choice.

"But if you want to" Jay's voice snapped him out of his reverie, making Heeseung sigh and face the boy who was now looking directly at him, "you can think about how to officially ask her."

"I need you all to help me" he said.

"We'll help" Jake smiled.

"Go to the beach tomorrow, just you and her" Sunghoon finished his drink and leaned back on the bar stool, running his hand through his hair before placing it on the table and drumming his fingers "We'll babysit our princess Aimi and you and y/n can enjoy the official proposal."

"I don't know, sometimes I think Sunghoon thinks so well" Jay whined, pretending to be thrilled.

But the reality was that the idea had been incredible.

"That's when you're not swearing at me" he retorted.

"But you deserve it!"

Jake rolled his eyes at Heeseung, leaving Jay and Sunghoon to continue the discussion while the other two thought about and came up with a weekend plan for the official proposal.

Perhaps something simple and completely romantic, as you liked and he knew very well. Jake could help you find a hotel facing the sea so that you and he could go for a walk in the evening and he could propose.

Heeseung was already getting anxious and, even though he knew you would accept, it was as if he was back in his teens. His stomach churned and his heart pounded as he smiled at Jake and thanked him for his help.

Heeseung's fingers gripped the leather of the steering wheel tightly. He was trying his best not to speed up any more than he had to, but he knew that he had already gone over the limit since he had received his call to meet him at the hospital.

He didn't even know if he had parked correctly when he stopped the car, let alone hear if anyone had said anything to him. Heeseung just ran into the building in search of the waiting room where you had informed him.

Heeseung could have sworn he was going to throw up at any moment.

Hi love, can you meet me at the hospital? Aimi and I have a little problem...

What kind of fucking problem was it? Because Heeseung's eyes were already blurring as he found the hospital room.

He stopped his hurried steps when he looked down the corridor and found you. You were talking to a doctor, with gray hair and a well-pressed lab coat. As Heeseung wandered his eyes over the two of you, he noticed Aimi lying on your shoulder.

That habit had remained from when the two of you first met. He thought it was the most adorable thing in the world that it had been his daughter's place of comfort. Almost every night, she would lie on your shoulder on the sofa and fall asleep before going to bed to listen to the story Heeseung told her before going to sleep.

One night he himself lay on your shoulder to see if it really was magic or if his daughter just liked to rest everywhere... He woke up two hours later, almost drooling and with you focused on the television, laughing softly as he got up, completely tired from the nap he had taken.

So yes, your shoulder was an extremely comfortable place to sleep.

But why was Aimi wearing a bandage on her head? Why was Heeseung running back toward the two of you? He almost screamed when he saw his little girl with that, already imagining a thousand scenarios where she'd had some suture, where that gray-haired doctor had bullied her and he was sure to end up with him and that lab coat that he now found ugly.

"Hey" he said as soon as he got close enough to the three of you.

"Hey, love" you greeted him first, turning towards Heeseung and feeling his lips on your forehead. The man bent down enough to kiss the top of Aimi's head in the process.

"So, you're the father?" the doctor asked, he just nodded.

"What happened? Is Aimi all right? Are you all right?" he could hear the tremor in your voice and felt like he was going to cry at any moment. You gave him a weak smile and then looked at the doctor.

"Usually mom is more nervous than dad," he laughed, "but I see you're the one who's calm around here, Mrs. Lee."

Mrs. Lee.

"But everything's under control now. Aimi was under observation for two and a half hours and has been released to go home."

"Two and a half hours?" Heeseung said loudly, almost scaring the little girl resting on his shoulder. He apologized to his daughter while looking at you and then at the doctor.

The man saw that he had said too much, or even knew that it wasn't a matter for him to deal with, so he just said goodbye and gave the two of you his contact details in case you needed to come back. You knew you wouldn't, so you just took Heeseung and Aimi home.

"Shall we?" you asked, cradling the little one in your arms and ready to leave the hospital.

"Two hours? What the fuck is two hours?"

"Heeseung" you warned him.

Swearing in Aimi's presence. He hissed an apology as he walked with you to the car.

"How did you get here? Two hours ago?" the irony in his voice already indicated how angry he was.

"Heejin brought us, I couldn't drive" you whispered after you reached Heeseung's car.

He carefully and calmly put your daughter in the back seat, into the car seat, and then buckled the seat belt. As soon as he closed the door, you didn't move.

"What?" he asked.

"The keys. You're not going to drive like that." He would have asked you 'like what?'. Not when you knew him so well and knew that he was shaking so badly with nerves that he could barely hold the wheel again.

So choosing to hand over the keys was the right thing to do. Heeseung going in the passenger seat and you taking the wheel to get home.

"Now can you please explain to me what's going on?"

You sighed loudly at the stoplight, looking over to find Heeseung's eyes already fixed on yours.

"Aimi fell at school and hit her head" you said. "It was absolutely nothing serious, but the nursery called me and I just thought I'd ask Heejin to bring us."

"And you didn't think to call me at the time?" he tried not to raise his voice out of nervousness, his heart completely racing at that moment.

"I knew you'd freak out more than you are now, and I think I only made things difficult because I was afraid you'd get sick."

The intention was valid and indeed true. Knowing Heeseung and how one hundred percent concerned he was, it might have been possible for the boy to faint while receiving the news of what had happened to Aimi.

There was a moment of silence while he thought about what to say. Heeseung knew you were right, but at the same time, he let his feelings go to his head, not even thinking about what was coming out of his mouth.

"What about taking care of serious matters about Aimi together?" he still looked at you, even though his attention was on the road now.

"I was just as worried about you as I was about her" your voice tried to be as soft as possible for him, both to calm him down and so as not to wake the sleepy little girl in the back seat.

"And you only let me know two hours later. Right!" he laughed humorlessly "If you were really worried about me, you would have told me what really happened and not deprived me of taking you and her to the hospital."

"Heeseung..."

"Why did you tell me at the hospital, y/n? Why didn't you wait until we got home?" he raised his voice without even realizing it.

"Heeseung" you called him again, but he didn't hear.

"Were you going to wait for me in the living room of our apartment with a heart bandage on her forehead and tell me it was a surprise?"

"Lee Heeseung!" you altered your voice a little more, stopping at another traffic light and looking at him in the process "Code orange" you finished when he looked back at you, feeling that the boy was analyzing every inch of your face.

"Dad?" Aimi called out. He turned on the spot and held her hand, seeing that his daughter had gone back to sleep.

Code Orange was a language the two of you had created so that you could use it when moments like this happened. Any argument, any disagreement around Aimi and all you had to do was say Code Orange to remind each other that she was there. And then you'd stop whatever you were saying so as not to scare her.

He didn't say anything else. He kept holding Aimi's hand until you drove home.

The routine has been the same since the three of you arrived home together. The only difference was that Heeseung kept quiet while you went to the kitchen and you walked with Aimi on your lap to the bedroom to get her things and prepare a bath.

Heeseung felt he'd blown it the moment he heard you talking about Code Orange.

He knows he crossed the line. He knows that it all hit him at once and with nerves and worry, things got completely out of hand.

Unforeseen events tend to happen in people's lives, and Heeseung knew that this triples when you become a father. He often heard from his parents, or even your parents, how things could get out of hand.

He remembers exactly the day at the amusement park when he was taking it easy with you and whatever was going to happen between the two of you. Heeseung was always on alert in case something happened to his daughter, but on the night he decided he was going to kiss you for the first time, Aimi got a fever. She felt sick and ran to meet her daughter. That unforeseen event was the first you two had experienced together.

Heeseung remembers every little event when the two of you had to change course just because things hadn't gone according to plan, and he hadn't let it get out of hand because he knew that unforeseen events happen. Becoming a father was already an unforeseen event in his life and each thing that happened made him prove his point.

He then ran a hand through his hair, frustrated by the whole thing because it wasn't that the official request had been completely sidetracked. It was because he was so worried about Aimi and ended up arguing with you just because he let his nerves get the better of him.

In our year-long relationship, he had never argued so seriously with you about anything. It wasn't the first time you'd done something with Aimi and told him hours later, but Heeseung knew it was because his heart was racing with the name of the two of you and the word little problem in the same sentence. You've never had a problem.

"What the fuck, Heeseung!" he wanted to tear his hair out as he remembered your stern eyes on him, your hands gripping the steering wheel tightly because he knew you didn't want to argue either. Whether in front of Aimi or not, neither of you wanted that.

Making amends was the only thing to do, but how? The request to make it official was already ruined and he had to come up with a plan B that he had no idea about, not least because the main plan hadn't even been his idea in the first place.

Sighing and throwing his head back, Heeseung opted to scour the app on his cell phone in search of something to eat. He wasn't in the mood to cook and didn't want to search the cupboards for something instant for the three of you, especially since he knew you'd been away from home too long and would need something substantial.

So he walked slowly to the bathroom which contained a huge bathtub, where you used to bathe Aimi every day while Heeseung prepared the food or did anything else. At your daughter's request, since she said she liked to talk to you during that time.

"I was too strong" Aimi's voice interrupted Heeseung's thoughts, as he stopped in the middle of the corridor and noticed the bathroom door open. He took a few more steps, enough to see that the bathtub was full, lots of colored foam that you only put in on days when Aimi really needed it – today was one of those days – and you were sitting on the floor, facing her.

"Of course you did, I'm so proud, actually" you said so encouragingly that Aimi clapped her hands, raising some foam and laughing along with you when one of them splashed onto your pants.

"I love you" Aimi told you.

"I love you too, my love" came your reply immediately. Heeseung sighed lovingly.

"Like my mom?"

Silence. Heeseung felt his throat go dry and didn't know why you hadn't answered Aimi's question. Whether you were thinking about something or whether it had caught you off guard as much as it had.

The truth was that yes, you loved her as your daughter. But neither you nor Heeseung rushed into things, not least because he wanted you to feel comfortable, and also because he didn't know how you felt about it. Your relationship with Aimi strengthened so naturally that outsiders thought you were mother and daughter. And when asked, no one denied it.

"Do you want me to be?" you asked after a while.

At that moment, your hands brushed some of the soap out of her hair, while Aimi played with some rubber animals floating on the water.

"I want to. I want to!" the little girl's excitement almost makes you cry if it weren't for the little arms around your neck in a tight hug. You didn't even care if you got wet or not.

And at that moment Heeseung felt his heart fill up. A few more steps he leaned against the doorframe, his eyes watering and only noticed when the scene in front of him became a little blurry. He had to blink a few times to keep the tears at bay.

"Dad! Dad!" Aimi greeted the boy, releasing herself from your embrace and making you turn quickly towards him "I want y/n to be my mother."

"Do you?" he asked.

Even though it had been in a soothing tone because of Aimi, you knew that the question had been asked as much for her as for you. Because as soon as his eyes shifted in your direction, you just nodded and turned your attention back to the little girl.

"I really want to" she sounded just as excited as the first time she'd said "Dad, did you know that mom y/n didn't let go of my hand today?"

"Really? And you want to tell me what happened at school?"

"Mom, can we let Dad in on the bath talk?"

She had never called you mom. Neither you nor Heeseung had heard it from her in the whole year of their relationship. Your heart felt like it was going to burst out of your mouth and you only realized you were about to cry when you heard Heeseung sniffling softly behind you.

"Of course, if he wants to" you tried not to let your voice get shaky.

Heeseung didn't want to risk saying anything or he'd cry even more, and he was grateful that his daughter was excited and didn't realize that both he and you were emotional. He sat on the toilet seat while he listened to Aimi tell the story.

How she defended herself against a little boy who picked on her at school. She also told how he didn't want to let her go down the slide, so she fought with him, but when she went down she hadn't been paying attention and hit her head on the tunnel before going down.

Noticing now that the little girl no longer had the bandage on her forehead, he saw the small cut. Something completely superficial and which probably shocked the teachers and even you because he thought about the amount of blood that came out. Confirming this as soon as you said it yourself after Aimi had finished counting the parts she could.

"How about we finish this bath and order dinner?" Heeseung let out a long sigh after laughing at some of the other things his daughter had said, hearing her giggle too.

"Sushi?" Aimi's eyes lit up at that.

"Are my girls okay with sushi?" he asked.

"We are!" you and Aimi replied together, and then Heeseung got up to order dinner.

It could have been considered a long wait until he ordered through the app, waited for it to arrive, and set everything up in the room. But he did it so calmly that you had time to finish Aimi's bath, dry her off, and put her pajamas on so that you could go into the living room and have dinner as a family.

"Can we watch it?" the little girl asked, smiling when her father agreed and let the two of you sit down on the sofa to eat.

Dinner was filled with laughter and more stories from little Aimi, a few comments about the cartoon the three of you were watching, and even the repetition of food because, according to her, it was so tasty.

After another hour the little one fell asleep on Heeseung's lap, which was something new because she always preferred to stay on your lap before she fell asleep. So maybe that's why he had the biggest smile on his face.

"Do you want some help?" you asked as you turned off the television.

"All right, I'll put her to bed then," Heeseung nodded in agreement and got up.

He walked off towards the bedrooms, leaving you to tidy up for dinner while he took great care to walk with his daughter on his lap without waking her. This had been done by him countless times, but he seemed to have lost the practice after you came into their lives because Aimi always called on you to do it.

And he loved this connection between the two of you so much. That's why he was happy. Because you had done something that he had always been used to doing alone, and by returning to it, things were fitting together more and more in Heeseung's mind.

Placing Aimi on the bed, he kissed her on the top of the head and smiled at the sleeping figure of his daughter. She was sleeping so peacefully that she didn't even look like she had bumped her head during the day – and faced a little boy at school – but Heeseung pretended not to have heard. He wanted to leave it to the girls since it was a bathtime conversation.

"I love you, little one" Heeseung whispered to Aimi as soon as he had tucked her under the covers, turning on the lamp before slowly leaving the room.

Now he needed to think about how to apologize to you and how to start this conversation. Maybe saying he loved you could also be a good thing, right? Or he could use the puppy-dog eyes tactic because that worked with you sometimes.

No, it was quite serious, he couldn't joke about it.

What would Heeseung do anyway? He started to panic as soon as he got to the living room and everything was tidied up. So you were probably already in the kitchen washing the dinner dishes, and as soon as he entered the room, you realized it was true.

"Did you get it?" you asked when you saw him standing in the kitchen doorway.

"I never miss a beat" he smiled, even though your attention was on the dish you were washing.

Not even a glance in his direction, not even a smile from the corner of your lips. Nothing. Heeseung wanted to scream and run away, but he chose to approach in slow steps and stand behind you.

At first, your posture seemed intact because you didn't notice that he had come so close, but when his hands found your waist and he pressed your back against his chest, you stopped everything you were doing.

Heeseung felt your body stiffen for a few seconds and then calm down as he slid his hands down your exposed skin from your hips to your belly and hugged you from behind.

"I'm sorry" he whispered with his lips between your hair.

"What?" you understood a little garbled because he hadn't said it clearly, but you wanted to be sure of the words or if you weren't thinking too much.

Meanwhile, you wiped your hands before forcing yourself to face him with Heeseung's hands still on your waist.

"I said I'm sorry" his voice could now be heard more clearly. Heeseung looked deep into your eyes as he heard you sigh softly.

"Heeseung, I—"

"No, I need to talk first. May I?" he asked. Your nod encouraged him to speak even though he didn't even know what he was doing in the first place.

Heeseung never got to that part where he needed to fix what he'd done or saw the person in front of him willing to listen to him. He had also never felt so much love – apart from his daughter – that made him feel complete.

He looked into your eyes, seeking even more approval as he leaned down to rest his forehead against yours.

"I'm sorry I was an idiot and broke the orange code" he whispered, a breath of air from his lips going straight against your skin. The sensation was so familiar, yet it always made you shiver "I'm sorry because as well as being worried about everything that happened, I was so frustrated."

You raised one of your hands, placing your icy fingers against his skin. Heeseung shivered at the touch, not because of the temperature, but because your hand was touching him.

"Frustrated with what?" your touch wasn't enough, you had to caress his cheek so lovingly and then slide your fingers to the back of his neck that Heeseung swore, right then, that he had to kiss you.

And he did. But it was as quick as it started because he wanted to talk and needed to get it off his chest.

"Earlier today I was with the boys and I had the desire to make things official with you" the boy felt each word come out so freely as his hands rested against your waist. You continued to caress the back of his neck and this time kissed the corner of his lips when you noticed that he seemed nervous before saying the next words "I was going to take you to the beach tomorrow. The boys would stay with Aimi and... Well... I'd officially ask you..."

Your hand stopped caressing him. He didn't know if that was good or bad, so he momentarily moved his forehead away from yours so that he could look into your eyes. They were attentive to Heeseung. Every movement, every word, everything that came from him.

"I know that after we become parents, unforeseen events happen and I've heard this from my parents, from yours, from colleagues who are parents. It really does happen" he explained so seriously that you found the pout that formed on Heeseung's lips cute "And I was frustrated because, as well as knowing that we wouldn't be able to go to the beach tomorrow, Aimi got hurt and I couldn't be there for the two of you."

"But you're with us every step of the way..."

"I know, love. I know that" he brought his face close to yours again "I think one thing joined another and I only saw the shit I'd done after you warned me. So I'm sorry."

"It's okay, it wasn't your fault" you said softly, causing Heeseung's heart to calm down a little.

He knew he was lucky from the moment he met you. He just didn't feel like he deserved it at this moment when everything seemed to make him feel bad about what had happened. Even with you telling him that everything was fine, the way Heeseung found to further derail his apology about you was to kiss you.

For real this time. Then he put one hand on your waist and brought the other up to your face to push away the hair that insisted on staying there.

Taking one last look into your eyes, Heeseung smiled before joining his lips to yours. The kiss started slowly, just longing for that touch as the wet muscles slid over each other. You allowed him to press your body to his as the kiss began to intensify, seeming more needy, urgent, and with a euphoric Heeseung pulling you even closer to him.

Neither of you felt like stopping it, both of you wanting anything that was stopping you – the clothes – to be out of the way and for everything to work out the way you both wanted it to. But before anything else, the air search was clear, so he slowly stopped the kiss, leaving his mouth still pressed to yours.

"I think the officiating was done by someone else today" Heeseung said a little too breathlessly, hearing your ragged breathing against his skin as well.

"What do you mean?" you asked.

He smiled, opening his eyes and seeing the sight of you with red, wet lips right in front of him. Something he would never get sick of seeing.

"I overheard some of the conversation in the shower today" Heeseung began. His lips went straight to your forehead, leaving them resting there as he whispered, "Her calling you mom for the first time just made me sure that making what we have official doesn't need a right place or need to be done by me."

"Heeseung…"

"I love you, y/n" he said, his lips coming away from your forehead so that he could look at you one more time as he spoke "I love you and I've known that we've been official since that first kiss in your mother's living room."

"I love you, you idiot" you said, your heart racing and full of love. You hugged him and kissed the tip of his nose as you lifted your feet to reach him "And that was definitely the best official request in the world. No beach can top that."

He laughed at your comment and pressed his lips to yours again, but without kissing them this time.

"Now how about you bath me too? I've had a busy day and I think I need to relax."

"You're worthless, that's for sure" you laughed, but under no circumstances would you deny Heeseung's request.

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girlgenius1111 · 2 months

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snapped part 2

misa x reader a much needed conversation is had. fluff x angst :)

When you awoke the next morning, you knew it was earlier than you wanted it to be. You were warm, tucked under the covers, but you lacked the body heat of your girlfriend. You wanted that more than anything, so you cracked your eyes open, looking for Misa.

You almost jumped when you were met with the sight of her face only a few inches from yours, eyes half shut with sleep. She laughed quietly when you startled, and you rolled your eyes, turning onto your other side, and reaching back for her hand. You pulled on it, and then pulled again, harder, until your girlfriend pressed herself up against your back, wrapping her arm tight around your abdomen. Her face tucked right into your neck.

"Te amo," you mumbled, already almost asleep again.

"Te amo, mi niña." She replied.

While you fell back asleep, Misa remained awake. It was early, only 7:00, and a day off for the both of you. Normally, Misa would be more than content to lay in bed with you as long as you wanted, taking the rare opportunity to sleep in. Today, though, she was counting down the minutes so she could slip from the bed; she had big plans, and if she wanted to get everything ready. before you woke up, she had to time it just right.

After another hour, where she adjusted you both so she could watch your face as you slept, tracing senseless patterns along your back, she slid out from next to you. Unconsciously, you rolled closer to where she had been, sighing when you didn't find her. You buried your head in her pillow, instead, and Misa was relieved that you didn't wake up.

-----

You woke up for real a few hours later, and it was nearly 10:00. You probably would have slept longer, but the absence of your girlfriend was bothering you, and you forced your eyes open, sitting up and looking around for her. She was nowhere to be found, and you sighed, dismayed at the fact that you would have to get out of bed to find her. Now that you were really awake, the memory of the events of yesterday was making your stomach turn. Had she gotten out of bed because she was still upset with you? You were pretty sure that you were upset with her, and you wanted a real apology, and at the same time, you couldn't help but worry. The signs that your girlfriend was miserable were glaring, and you were sure she would try to brush it aside, no matter how hard you tried to get her to talk about it.

With a gargantuan task ahead, you slid out of bed, grabbing a throw blanket off the chair in the corner of the room, and wrapped yourself up in it, before heading out of the bedroom in search of your girl. You followed the smell of coffee and food towards the kitchen, your lips pulling into a small smile at the sight in front of you.

Misa was standing at the kitchen counter, two plates of food set in front of her. The kitchen was spotless, and somehow, the food was still steaming. She was adding the finishing touches to what you assumed to be your coffee, muttering to herself in Spanish under her breathe. There was, adorably, a small smear of pancake batter on her cheek. And not one but two bouquets of flowers sitting in vases in near the food, alongside a rather large gift bag.

Misa was pouring the cream into your coffee like it was a science experiment, evidently trying to get the coffee to match the exact shade you preferred it to be. You waited until she was done, not wanting to mess up her hard work, to clear your throat, getting her attention.

"Amor! No!" She groaned, and you look at her, confused.

"What have I done?" You asked, walking towards her.

"You were supposed to still be asleep, and I was going to bring breakfast in bed." She complained, gesturing wildly to the beautifully plated pancakes. Misa could cook only one thing, if you could even call making pancakes cooking, but she did it well.

"Pancakes in bed would have been messy." You replied, grabbing a damp towel to carefully wipe the batter off of her face. She blushed as you did so, not having known it was there. "And I woke up because I was cold. My personal heater disappeared."

Misa blushed harder, looking down at you with a love sick expression that you'd grown accustomed to seeing across her features. Her eyes were pools of warm brown, gazing into your own with an almost overwhelming amount of affection.

"Buenos días," you said quietly, leaning up to press a quick kiss to her lips. "Feeling better this morning?" You asked, not at all surprised when her eyes flickered away from yours, her expression transforming into one of heavy guilty.

"Sí, better." She replied shortly. "Eat?"

You nodded, deciding to give her some time to relax with you before you tried to open the tightly locked up chest of Misa's Feelings.

Once breakfast had been consumed, a comfortable silence filling the room as you ate, you nodded at the flowers. "Two?"

"I could not pick." Misa dismissed, sliding the gift bag towards you. When you didn't reach for it, she nudged it closer again, raising her eyebrows at you.

You laughed, shaking your head.

"You do not want your present?" She asked, suddenly looking very insecure.

You stood from your seat at the counter, hastily wiping your hands on the dish towel, before moving closer to your girlfriend and resting your hands on her cheeks.

"I don't need a present. I appreciate you doing all of this, baby, I do. What I want, though, is an apology. And an explanation."

Misa nodded earnestly. "I am so so sorry, mi amor. There is no excuse. I was frustrated with the game, but I should not have been so mean, especially not when you were trying to make me feel better. Your goals were... fenomenal. Beautiful shots, amor. You played so well, and you made me so proud. I wish I had told you yesterday."

You could tell, based on the look on your girlfriend's face, and the intensity with which she spoke, that she meant every word. You could also tell that she had spent a lot of time thinking about what she'd said to you. You clocked the deep bags under her eyes, and wondered if she had spent most of the night thinking of how to make it up to you.

"Thank you, M. I forgive you." You told her carefully.

Misa's eyes widened in surprise "You do? Just like that?"

"You apologized, and I can tell that you meant it. I love you, and I know you. Yesterday was not about me, it was about how upset you were. Obviously, I was still upset, but I'm not mad anymore, baby, I-"

You were cut off by Misa bringing you into a fierce hug. It bordered on too tight, her arms wrapping around you, one hand pressing your head into her shoulder, while she buried her face in your hair.

"I do not deserve you," She murmured. She said it with such conviction, such belief, that you pulled away instantly, fighting her tight grip.

"Yes you do," you insisted. Misa nodded, then, and you knew it was her effort to avoid conflict, to avoid conversation. "Can we talk about what got you so upset yesterday?"

The goalkeeper's face hardened, and when she spoke, it was slightly robotic. "You know I do not like to lose. I was just upset about that."

"It's more than that, though? Isn't it?"

Misa stepped away, putting physical distance in between the two of you. "No, that is it." She insisted.

With that, she turned, walking into the living room and settling on the sofa, you close behind. Her knee was bouncing rapidly, and though she tried to look calm and unbothered, you could see the strain of anxiety in her face, the way her upper body was sitting up too straight, the way her jawline was more exaggerated than usual, teeth clenched tightly together.

"I hate it when you do this," you admitted. If your girlfriend had one weakness, it was you. She likely thought she was doing you a favor by keeping everything inside, not knowing that it really killed you to not understand what was going on in her head. As expected, she turned to you, surprised.

"Do what?"

"Shut down completely when I try to talk to you about what is clearly going on with you."

"What is clearly going on with me?" She asks defensively.

"You're having a hard time, I know you, and I know when you aren't doing well." You said evenly, moving closer to her until you could intertwine your fingers with hers. You could see her struggle, trying to get herself to pull away, but not able to refuse herself the comfort.

"I am doing fine. Yesterday was a rough match, but that is it." She replied eventually.

"You've had rough matches before, and I've never seen you act like that. Ever."

"We lose often this season. It builds up, I am more upset with the team than I was before." She argued. She was holding strong, and you decided to switch tactics.

"Yesterday's loss was far from your fault. And even if you think you made a few mistakes, or you could have played better, you cannot be perfect all the time, Misa. I don't expect you to be. I don't need you to be perfect. I just need you to be you."

You watched as her lip started to tremble, and as she bit down hard on it, eyes burning holes in the table in front of her.

"You are perfect," she murmured eventually, looking up with misty eyes. "How can I not try to be perfect for you?"

It was almost ridiculous, how this beautiful girl regarded you. You were human, you had your faults, ones you were more than aware of. Misa didn't seem to see any of those, though. Every insecurity you had ever expressed to her she had assured you, very convincingly, that she loved whatever it was. If there was an argument to be made for who was perfect, here, you felt that you could make a convincing case that it was her.

"I'm not perfect, Misa." She looked almost offended at the notion, brows furrowing tightly together, and you had to bite back a grin at her reaction. "I'm not. And you aren't either. No one is. But, Misa, the way that you love me? That is perfect. You are everything that I need, everything that I want. I have spent every single day with you completely convinced of your love for me. I want you to feel that way, too."

She looked conflicted, and you knew you'd broken through her rough exterior, just a little.

"Do you think the way that I love you is perfect? Do you believe that I love you, baby?" You asked, squeezing her hand in yours as her eyes widened at your question.

"Claro que sí," she replied, her habit of slipping into spanish when she was overwhelmed always making you smile.

"Then you don't need to try to be perfect. You never expect more from me than I can give, yet you constantly hold yourself to impossibly high standards. You are the woman I love, Misa, and I want you to be as kind to yourself as you are to me."

Misa's mouth opened and closed a few times, before a lone tear slipped down her cheek. Finally, she made eye contact with you, the apprehension and insecurity on her face making your heart clench.

"I do not know how," she told you, impatiently wiping away the tear.

"I'll show you." You promised, wrapping your arms around her neck, and pulling her in for a deep kiss. She kissed you back, hard, as if trying to express her affection for you without using her words. When you finally broke apart, her lips were red and puffy, but she didn't look as upset.

"C'mere," you mumbled, tugging her to lay down with you, her head resting on your chest. Her chin rested on your sternum and she gazed up at you. "Now, sleep."

"You just woke up," she dissented.

"Yes, but this is step one. You look like you barely slept last night." She still looked hesitant. "And pancakes make me sleepy." You added, smiling triumphantly when she nodded once, resting her head down against your chest.

It was a testament to how exhausted she was that it didn't take long for her breathing to even out, her breaths unconsciously matching yours. You turned the TV on to some random football match, as your own eyes grew heavy.

"You had almost fallen asleep yourself, when Misa's groggy words broke through the fog of sleep.

"Your present," she mumbled, realizing that you'd never opened it.

"I'll only accept it if you sleep now." You replied, kissing the top of her head, even as she grumbled her complaint.

"Fine... only because of that."

"For sure. Definitely not because you're exhausted."

"Nope. Not tired." She affirmed, her head nuzzling closer to your chest, eyes not even open anymore.

She was ridiculous, your girlfriend. Ridiculous, and perfect all the same.

#woso imagine #woso x reader #misa rodriguez x reader

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inbarfink · 7 months

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Part of Fionna’s frustrations with Mundanewold were subconscious longings for her old life of magical adventure, but a lot of her problems tied more into deeply-rooted issues of monotony and a feeling like she can't do anything to change her lot in life and like her actions don’t matter.

And it does seem like Fionna and Friends’ lives have been kinda Stuck in a Rut - especially when you compare the way their lives parallel and diverge from their Mainworld counterparts. Most of the differences are... rather than just different choices diverging into different arcs - it’s the same arc, but the Fionnaworld characters are just stuck behind.

Fionna is still reeling from the breakup with DJ Flame and only met Hunter at the very day our story starts. Marshall Lee has more Unresolved Issues with his mom compared to Marceline and her dad. He and Gumball haven’t even met yet. Not to mention the Mundaneworld-specific problems like Fionna being unable to hold a steady job or Gary eternally spinning his wheels about opening his own bakery.

Fionna thought she wanted a world of magic, but while the added bits of strangeness and whimsy to Fionnaworld by the end of the show are certainly a cool fun bonus (and Cake is surely thankful to have the ability to freely think and speak her mind and stretch) - what Fionna and friends were really missing was a world where their actions matter, where things change, where they are real.

And especially important for Fionna and Cake to admit it, because handling the fact their actions have consequences has been a huge part of both of their character arcs. For Cake it was all about getting used to the fact that her newfound human-like sapience means being measured against human-like morality. For Fionna it's about not comparing everything in her life to video games and thinking through her actions at least a little bit.

Consequences are the thing Fionna and Cake struggled with the most, but it was what they were missing all along.

Now this seems to be, like, an actual metaphysical thing. I mean, the show hasn’t gone super into detail of how Fionnaworld worked but it does seem like Prismo’s stories had an active role in moving the events of the World forwards, possibly using the same event-manipulating-Magic that make sure his Wishes have that Obligatory Ironic Twists?

And once Ice King turned back to Simon, Prismo lost all ability to observe or create stories for Fionnaworld. And what happens to characters of a story once the writer can’t access their external hard-drive anymore? They just sorta get stuck. Moving their own lives forwards without Prismo’s stories is just a lot harder.

And if there is some sort of force in control behind the scenes of Fionnaworld at the start of the series, it’s only Simon’s subconscious - a fact F&C alludes to numerous times

And at the start of the show, how was Simon’s feeling about his own life?

In addition to Simon’s longing and memories for the pre-War world shaping the exact form of Fionna’s nonmagical world, perhaps his feelings of ennui and depression and helplessness have also subtly ‘infected’ this world?

It is perhaps not a coincidence that Marshall Lee and Gary Prince’s storyline only starts moving forwards after Simon embarks on the adventure and starts climbing out of his mental rock bottom. When things seem to move forwards for him as well.

As such, ‘Canonizing’ Fionnaworld solves more of Fionna’s problems much more than simply making it as magical as Ooo but keeping it as a tiny hidden bubble in someone's dome. It ensures the World’s inhabitants’ free will and agency and ability to enact change on the status quo with no need for Prismo’s stories or being dependent on the still-kinda-shaky mental health of Simon Petrikov. Thus giving them a world where everything matters and things can always change.

But also there's a psychological element for the Fionnaworld protagonists. You know, the reason why Fionna is stuck in her rut is because she’s too impulsive and careless. Gary is too perfectionist. Marshall never had someone who would stand up to him against his mom.

Fionna’s whole arc in the show is about learning to be more thoughtful and careful and considerate through her Multiverse Adventure. While Gary and Marshall Lee find release from the thing holding them back within Fionnaworld, with each other.

‘Canonizing’ Fionnaworld is like... half actively altering their world into a ‘real’ one where change is possible, or at least easier - and half about an affirmation that their world was always real because change is about them outgrowing their personal issues (and also, y’know, about protecting their universe from the spiteful Beetle Cop).

And with how Fionna used to feel ‘trapped’ in the City, with nowhere to go and nothing to do - there is another change in Fionnaworld as a result of ‘canonization’ that feels very notable.

I’m not entirely sure, but from Scarab's dialogue it seems likely that becoming a ‘real’ authorized universe just kinda manifested a whole planet and universe beyond the borders of the small existing Fionnaworld. Although I guess it's also possible that the process of repairing the existing city they found a way to expand it gradually - maybe it doesn’t matter as much as the fact that either way, Fionna’s horizons have been literally expanded.

So you know, if she ever gets that thirst for adventure again... she actually has a Whole New World to travel and explore, it might not have (a lot of) magic but... she already heard Simon's stories of his adventures in a similar low-Magic world. It's a totally viable outlet for her.

What Fionna really needed to find the joy in her life is to be Real - to know that her actions have consequences for ill and for good. Because sometimes an adventure looks like saving a Prince of candy from an evil Ice Witch, or going on a multiverse journey to uncover a cursed Magic Crown… but it can also look like backpacking through Europe or campaigning against your evil landlady.

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undercoveravenger · 7 months

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Motivators

Pairing: Isaac Lahey x Scientist!Male!Reader

Requested: Yes

Request: “okay for the spooky request could you write Isaac lahey x scientist reader who doesn’t believe in the supernatural but they are hunting a ghost and reader and Isaac make a bet where if they do find the ghost reader owes Isaac a kiss or something”

A/N: This is the third fic in the 2023 Spooky Month event! The next post will release on Tuesday, October 24th. Hope you enjoy!

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While your best friend Scott McCall and his pack were no strangers to your lab, you still found yourself a bit on edge with Scott’s beta, Isaac. You had known of him before he was turned, and he had seemed nice enough the few times you had interacted with him, but there had always seemed to be something off, even after Scott had told you the truth about his friends. You weren’t sure exactly why Isaac made you so uneasy, but the weight of his eyes, whether glowing their infamous werewolf gold or his pretty every-day blue, was ever present and unreadable.

Even now, with the rest of the pack off investigating the most recent victim of a vengeful spirit, Isaac lingered, perched on one of the spare lab tables pushed against the wall and watching you intently.

“You didn’t have to wait here,” you say, ardently refusing to look at him, studying the strange glowing sample they’d brought you through the viewing lens of your microscope. “You heard Scott- He thinks he’s got a lead. You could’ve gone with him to check it out.”

A soft huff escapes Isaac and you can hear him shift behind you, moving from his seat on the opposite table to come lean against the one you’re working at. “No,” he says quietly, “I needed to be here.” He’s silent for a minute and you almost think to press him further when he continues, “I know you don’t need me to be here, but I need to be.” He clears his throat awkwardly when you look up at him, but he presses on, in spite of the thick blush clouding his cheeks. “I worry about you a lot when I’m not around you, y’know? Not just that you’re just a human, but that you’re you.”

You studied Isaac for a long moment, a sort of self-satisfied amusement creeping through you as he fidgets under your gaze, clearly having said more than he meant to and exposing his emotions in the process.

“You really think that you’re going to catch this ghost?” You asked, crossing your arms over your chest as you watched him.

He nodded, grinning shyly, “Yeah. With you and Scott working together to find it? No way we don’t.”

Whenever you’d caught Isaac looking at you in the past, the look in his eyes was always intense, but he was unreadable in the same way that the old Latin tombs that Allison had swiped from her family’s archives for you had been. But in the same way you had learned to decipher those ancient books, you were starting to see the meaning behind those lingering stares and Isaac’s looming presence. He’d never seemed malicious to you, not even before he’d joined Scott’s pack, but now you could see that determined distance for what it was.

You rolled your eyes and turned back to your sample, but couldn’t stop the edge of your lips from quirking up as you spoke. “You find it and I owe you a kiss.”

While you were no longer looking at him, you could pick out the exact moment Isaac realized what you’d said since you could hear his sneakers squeak against the floor as he struggled to catch himself from falling. “I- I, uh, I-” he stammered and you could practically hear how flustered he was. “I’m- I’m gonna go call Scott and see if his lead panned out. Y’know, we uh, we really need to get rid of this ghost thing before it hurts someone else. We should- We should really do everything we can to catch it as soon as possible, right?”

You couldn’t help but laugh as he hurried out of the room, and you laughed even harder when you were able to pick up the excited whoops echoing in from outside of your lab from Isaac and Scott over the phone line.

#isaac lahey x male reader #isaac lahey x male!reader #male reader x isaac lahey #male!reader x isaac lahey #male reader x teen wolf #male!reader x teen wolf #teen wolf x male reader #teen wolf x male!reader #teen wolf x reader #reader x teen wolf #teen wolf reader insert #male reader insert #male!reader #x male!reader #x reader #x male reader #male!reader insert #male reader

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iamthat-iam · 2 months

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Outer Space (another ND Story) 🌌🌠💫

Since Taylor was a child, she always wanted to go to outer space. Every time she played, she would always imagine that she was an astronaut who would fly her spaceship into the cosmos and visit other planets.

She always had an inkling that there was life outside of Earth. She used to make all kinds of alien friends, and she made sure to tell her parents about them all.

As she grew up, unfortunately she lost the spark she once had as a child. Life seemed to put her in bad situation after bad situation, and all she wanted was an escape. Her family had a history of addiction, so Taylor tried to find every resource possible so she wouldn't end up down that route.

She was introduced to a "guru," whom she went to for guidance and advice. She told him her entire life story, including the portion of her childhood where she was fascinated with outer space.

"Honestly, going to space would make me happier than anything," she admits. "It used to make me so happy as a child. Now I'm depressed because life is constantly beating me up. I just want to escape."

"Escape from what? What is here now that you need to escape from?" The guru inquired.

"My problems, my depression, just about everything.." Taylor sighed.

"Where do your problems go when you are not thinking about them? Who is depressed?" The guru questioned further.

These two questions perplexed Taylor a bit. Is there a secret answer?

"Umm.. I'm not sure how to answer the first question. The second question is obviously me... Who else would i be referring to?"

"I'll give you a hint," the guru smiled. "When I asked you 'what is here now that you need to escape from', I was pointing to this present, unfolding moment. Right now, in this room we are sitting in, your problems don't exist. Same thing with your depression. You are aware of feelings that you've labeled 'depression', but are YOU actually depressed?"

This actually made Taylor think. He does have a point. When Taylor is focused on other things throughout the day, and not her problems, they don't seem to exist in that moment. Something clicked about her depression as well. This whole time she was assigning a negative meaning to feelings that actually have no meaning at all?

"So what you're saying is, I've just accepted a narrative about myself that's not really true outside of me accepting it as true?" Taylor asked.

The guru clapped and gave Taylor a wide grin. "You are absolutely correct! Now let's go deeper. You said you always dreamed of going to outer space as a child. When you described this experience, you spoke as if it didn't really happen, or it was fictional. Tell me what is more 'realistic' about our conversation versus the 'daydreams' you had as a child."

Another mind-boggling question from this guru. Taylor hesitated a moment before she gave her answer. "Well I'm experiencing this conversation with the 5 senses, doesn't that make it more real?"

The guru shook his head. "Have you ever noticed during your dreams at night, the 5 senses work the exact same way as when you're awake? The 5 senses can't possibly be the culprit that makes one experience "more real" than another. Have you noticed that there is a common denominator between all experiences, whether it's the waking state, sleep, daydreaming, or visualizing? What is always present during all of this?"

This gave Taylor an a-ha moment. "I'm always present during all of these experiences! So does that mean one experience is not more real than the other, because I'm always aware during it all?"

"Absolutely," the guru stated matter-of-factly. "This means that your experiences in outer space where you made alien friends are just as 'real' as this conversation we're having now."

This was enough to bring Taylor to tears. She couldn't believe she created a barrier between herself and her "desires" as if she was seperate from them. The friends she made and all the wonderous experiences in outer space were real events that actually happened. But she took her suffering to be real, and has been torturing herself for years for no reason!

"I... Don't know what to say except thank you.." Taylor uttered through tears. "You've given me life-changing advice today. How can I repay you?"

The guru gently held Taylor's hands. "You don't owe me a thing. I am just you pointing you back to yourself. Now enjoy your dream. I'm sure your alien friends miss you."

And so Taylor visited her alien friends once more, making up for lost time. She is finally enjoying the freedom she longed for her whole life.

#this is really long but I hope y'all got the message lol #non dualism #nondualism #consciousness #awareness #self realization #self #advaita vendata

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knaccblog · 8 months

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Aziraphale and "I Forgive You"

So after I watched the first season a few times however many years ago, I noticed something, wrote up a bit of a meta about it and then never posted it. I thought that it was either very obvious or very silly and either way, no one needed to see it. But now it's several years and another season later and again, I'm noticing the exact same thing so here it goes- I think the reason Aziraphale keeps saying that he forgives Crowley has overall very little to do with what Crowley has just done right before Aziraphale says it and much more to do with a secret Aziraphale hides deep within himself and has for thousands of years, a truth that he hates to acknowledge and is terrified to speak aloud: he thinks God is wrong to have not Forgiven Crowley.

Get settled in because this is gonna take a bit.

The first time I started noticing this really clearly is the Bandstand Breakup scene. Crowley starts by cussing God literally out- "For the record, great, pustulant, mangled bollocks to the Great blasted Plan." To which Aziraphale says, "May you be forgiven." And yes, Crowley has just sinned and Aziraphale is a stuffy angel but the way Aziraphale says it is like a hope, atleast to my ears. Like he's really wishing that God will see how good Crowley truly is and bring him back to Heaven even though he keeps doing stupid stuff like this

Anyway, Crowley then responds with, "I won't be forgiven. Not ever. Part of a demon's job description. Unforgivable. That's what I am." And Aziraphale responds again with a hopeful sounding, "You were an angel once." At this point, I was almost sure that he's talking about his personal wishes here. It sounds like he's saying, "Come on, Crowley. There's a chance." To which Crowley responds, "That was a long time ago," basically saying it's impossible and shutting that whole bit of the conversation down. And you can just watch Aziraphale's face fall at that, like it kills him for that to be true.

The next time the topic of forgiveness and Crowley comes up is when Crowley shows up to beg Aziraphale to run away with him one last time. In this conversation, Aziraphale is very adamant that if he talks to the right people, they won't want the apocalypse and they'll stop it. He, of course, thinks this because his most core belief is that God is good and that even if we don't understand how what God is doing is good right now, it will lead to goodness eventually via the Rube Goldburg machine which is time and the universe etc aka God is ineffable. But even Aziraphale can't imagine how the ineffable Rube Goldburg machine could turn an event where everything on earth dies into a good one so therefore, he's certain that God doesn't want the Apocalypse.

Crowley responds to this hope with, "You're so clever. How can someone as clever as you be so stupid?" to which Aziraphale responds, "I forgive you" in a very gentle but sure tone. And now yes, while it is entirely possible that Aziraphale is forgiving Crowley for calling him stupid, I've always felt like that would be a rather weighty response considering how mild an insult it is. It's also possible (and I feel slightly more likely) that Aziraphale is forgiving Crowley for his lack of faith, his inability to believe in the goodness of God anymore.

And that could definitely be it, but if we think about the way Aziraphale had talked about forgiveness at the Bandstand, the hope and desire that he seemed to put into the idea of forgiveness and Crowley and the fact that Crowley had dismissed it as entirely impossible for him to ever be forgiven, than a third read of Aziraphale's "I forgive you" emerges: one in which Aziraphale is saying, "While God might never forgive you, I do". It's "I might never see you again since you intend to run away to the stars but if this is the last time I ever see you, I want you to know that I think you are deserving of forgiveness. That I see the good in you even if God can't." It's a combination "I love you" and small rebellion against God, because while Aziraphale can't bring himself to give up on Her completely and run away with Crowley (even though a part of him clearly wants to), he is willing to say that She's done this one thing wrong and it's never forgiving Crowley, who Aziraphale can see clearly is more kind and good than any of the angels he knows.

So yeah, that was about where the idea rested at the end of the first season but now we have a bunch of new historical scenes and a new "I forgive you" following a very loaded conversation in which Aziraphale got extremely excited by the idea of Crowley being reinstated as an Angel and I felt like this idea has even more legs than before.

To me, it's very clear that Aziraphale's pitch for Crowley to come back to Heaven isn't him hoping to "reset" Crowley to how he was before the Fall or him being incapable of loving Crowley as a Demon and instead was him being overjoyed to have this secret truth (Crowley is deserving of God's Forgiveness) that he's been observing for 6000ish years be acknowledged and have a chance to come to fruition. After all, as we saw this season (and honestly last season too but less pronounced), Crowley, current Demon Crowley, not the angel he knew over 6000 years ago, has proven over and over again just how truly good he is to Aziraphale.

For example, in the Job sequence, Crowley does a truly good thing that no Angel (beside Aziraphale) would do or even think that they should do and that is save Job's children. And through the entirety of this bit, Aziraphale basically always believes that he will. There are even two moments where Crowley tries his best to scare Aziraphale away, to play up being the bad guy (so as to better hide the con he's running and protect Aziraphale), but Aziraphale's faith in Crowley's goodness does not falter. At the end of the day, it seems clear that Aziraphale has more faith that Crowley will do the good thing, the correct thing than God. Conveniently for Aziraphale's faith in God though, not understanding how something horrible he hates will eventually lead to goodness in the long run is a foundational principle of said faith so his faith in God remains strong even after everything She and Heaven do to Job.

But his faith in Crowley doesn't require such a complicated work around. He believes Crowley won't kill children and he is correct. Though unfortunately, this very simplicity leads to a new problem, a problem that we can see eventually solidify in Aziraphale's mind, becoming a running theme of their association and leading to the eventual "I forgive you"s.

Aziraphale can clearly see how kind and good Crowley is, how he does the right thing as best he can, even when he could (and sometimes does) get into immense trouble for it. But for some reason, despite repeated evidence that Crowley is everything that Aziraphale believes Angels are and should be, Crowley continues to be a Demon. And once you realize that Aziraphale has noticed this contradiction and that it most likely haunts him and is a constant challenge to his worldview, it colors a lot of what he says in a new light. Many of what seem like simple, self-righteous statements reveal themselves to be Aziraphale trying to protecting himself from a massive logical inconsistency he keeps stumbling across.

"It must be bad, otherwise you wouldn't have tempted them into it," Aziraphale says, clearly not quite sure why it's bad actually.

"You, I'm afraid, are evil," Aziraphale asserts, basically stating that Crowley is evil because he's evil. It's tauntological and therefore doesn't have to make sense. (He says this one shortly before Crowley saves Elsbeth from suicide, poverty and damnation.)

"So this is all your demonic work? I should have known," Aziraphale says, thinking, "Aha, this time Crowley must have done the bad thing and therefore continues to deserve being Fallen." (Crowley has, in fact, not done the bad thing but shhhh, worry about that later.)

Once you notice this self defensive habit, you can't unnotice it really, it's just so present in Aziraphale's logic and speech. Aziraphale even at one point says, "Still a demon, then?" after the Ark and Job and Jesus because on some level he probably doesn't want to actually evaluate, it makes no sense to him that Crowley is still a Demon, especially when he has also sinned in a few ways (lied to Gabriel, thwarted the will of God, technically gluttony etc) and nothing has happened to him, to say nothing for all the things Gabriel has done (or has just let passively happen without a thought to interfere).

So yes, I think the entire final argument plays out the way it does because Aziraphale thinks Crowley is good and deserves to be reinstated, to be forgiven by God more than anything.

He comes into their final conversation nervous but excited, to the point where he stomps right over what Crowley is trying to say. "You see I... I have some incredible good news to give you." The good news is for Crowley, you see, because Crowley deserves this and clearly being forgiven like he so deserves should logically make Crowley happy. It will make Aziraphale happy after all.

Aziraphale then starts to describe the conversation that he had with Metatron, stating that he thinks he might have misjudged him. And why would he think that he misjudged the angel who had told him point blank to his face that "The point is not to avoid the war, it is to win it" about the Apocalypse? Well, it's not because he's offered the job of Supreme Archangel, that's for sure. As we can see in the flashback, Aziraphale seems nervous and uninterested in the job at first. He says clearly that he doesn't want to go back to Heaven and even brings up a very half assed excuse to try and weasel out of it, a soft no of, "Where will I get my coffee?"

No, instead, the clear, obvious point where Aziraphale changes his mind about the job and about the Metatron is when he offers to reinstate Crowley as an Angel. Metatron has, quite accidentally (I think? I don't think he actually knows Aziraphale's secret soul), just said one of the most faith affirming things he possibly could to Aziraphale, "We can correct that little error that's been bothering you. You are completely correct that Crowley deserves God's forgiveness."

Given that, it's understandable that Aziraphale is absolutely bubbly about Crowley's reinstatement when he mentions it to him, like the best thing ever has just happened to him even though he's talking about something that will happen to Crowley and not him at all. "You could come back to heaven and- and everything. Like the old times, only even nicer." (Nicer because this time, they are in love. Nicer because they'll both be powerful enough to make a difference.)

Some other bits of Aziraphale's dialogue from this scene that make so much sense through this lens are:

After Crowley tries to reiterate his constant stance that both sides are bad actually, and mentions how he rejected Hell's offer to work with them again, Aziraphale misses his point completely and says, "But well, obviously you said no to Hell, you're the bad guys. But Heaven, it's the side of truth, of light, of good." Aziraphale's faith in the potential goodness of Heaven and the actual goodness of God is unflappable but so is his belief that good is what Crowley wants to be doing. Like of course a good soul like Crowley would reject working for Hell again but why would he reject a chance to do good like he's sneakily been doing all along? (Aziraphale here ignores the fact that he's also had to sneakily do good on the side sometimes even though he was always working for "the side of good" but that is very par for the course for him sadly.)

The lines, "Come with me- to heaven. I'll run it, you can be my second in command. We can make a difference," are a particularly telling set. Everything about these from the high position he's offering Crowley to the "We" scream that Aziraphale trusts Crowley, a Demon, to guide Heaven the correct way more than any angel already in Heaven.

Aziraphale's final, desperate argument also lines up well with this (as well as featuring Aziraphale more completely referencing how he wants him and Crowley to be together romantically). "Come back, to heaven. Work with me! We can be together. Angels... Doing good. I- I need you! I don't think you understand what I'm offering you." Like is the "I need you" here romantic? Definitely. But it's also Aziraphale again affirming that he trusts Crowley to lead him the correct way ie goodness, because, as it's been shown to us many times (and focused on particularly in this season), Crowley will do and always has been doing the correct thing as best he could while Aziraphale would dither and be locked into passivity (like in The Resurrectionists).

So yes, after many attempts to explain to Crowley how he should be in Heaven, doing good and Aziraphale needs his help and one last desperate kiss from Crowley, we reach the final dreaded, "l forgive you." And yes, maybe Aziraphale is forgiving Crowley for not having faith that they can fix heaven, for abandoning him, for kissing him so suddenly. But I hope, after everything I've laid out here in this essay, you can also see why I think Aziraphale is saying, "Even as you reject God's forgiveness and leave me behind, I still see that you are good and know you deserve it so I will forgive you anyway." And maybe, even though it's still blasphemous to disagree with God, it's less scary for Aziraphale to say "I forgive you" one more time than tell Crowley that he loves him for the first time. He is very good at forgiveness after all.

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ilguna · 6 months

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Hello! For the event could I please have prompt 7 from the expired medicine list with Finicky or Katniss, whichever one you think would work best! Thank you and congrats on 3000!

☼ cerulean pt1 (Finnick Odair) ☼

warnings; swearing, a harassment accusation, whore used derogatorily.

wc; 2k

prompt; 7. fling.

notes; reader/finnick are the same age, pre-canon.

—

Gloss lets out an annoyed sigh, coming to a stop. “(Y/n), I told you that we should’ve left sooner.”

You press your lips together, eyes searching the crowd to find the designated rows for mentors and stylists. Most—if not, all—of the seats that are reserved for you have been completely taken up. Except for a pair that have been strategically left absent, intended for you and Gloss to sit in.

Which would be perfect, if it weren’t for the fact that your tributes’ stylists are placed a row beneath, on the opposite end. That’s where you had told them to sit, because you thought you’d be a few minutes late. Those minutes ended up turning into a half hour, as you had to change your entire outfit and adjust your makeup to match.

In the years you spent training for the Games and preparing for the Capitol, they never told you just how many rules there are to follow, here. They range from obvious to unspoken, but to you, half of them are unnecessary.

The one that shot you down tonight is the palette rules. The first is that you cannot wear the same colors that your tributes will wear for their interviews. You got past that one just fine, as they’re usually forced to wear bright colors to draw attention, something that you aren’t really into.

The second one is about matching outfits with mentors. You’re not allowed to wear the exact same outfit as your other mentor unless you’re siblings or dating. Whereas Cashmere and Gloss got away with it for years, you wouldn’t be able to do the same, not that you want to, anyway.

It’s the third that you got caught on. See, you’re allowed to wear the same colors as Gloss, but you’re not allowed to match colors with mentors outside of him. This is for multiple reasons, the primary one being in case a camera pans to the crowd, it needs to be obvious who is where and what they’re wearing.

On top of that, for districts that are expecting for their tributes to be popular, it’s customary to submit what color the mentor is going to wear. You meant to do this, but you kept putting it off because you were busy and had other things to worry about. Gloss knew this, and thought that he’d be nice and submit it for you, and he was going off of the last color you’d mentioned.

It was cerulean blue, because you’d seen the color in a stylists’ closet, and throughout the week, you haven’t been able to get it off your mind. When you overheard the District Four mentors talking about a similar color, you had to give it up. They have a monopoly over the color blue, you would be the one shamed for going out of your boundaries.

And you suppose you could’ve talked to Finnick Odair or Mags Flanagan about them choosing a different color, if it weren’t for the rivalry that’s been going on over the past couple of years. It’s only grown worse in the last year.

To make an extremely long story short, Finnick started the rivalry when he didn’t join the Career pack during his Games, and proceeded to openly bash Districts One and Two as a whole. At the time, he said he hated the Career dynamic, the names you’re given, and the attitude you have about everything. He finished by saying each time one of you dies, you have it coming because of stupid actions made early on.

Instead of Mags, his mentor, trying to downplay his words and squirm their way out of it, she stood behind him. Everything that came out of his mouth dragged them down further into a grave. When he won, he refused to take anything he said back, because he meant every word.

Since then, the Careers have excluded District Four from every one of their activities. Between the Capitol week, during the tribute parade, the training, the interviews, and the time in the arena. No one is to intermingle with the fish district, even if it means death.

Well, you won two years after Finnick had, at the bright age of sixteen. You shunned Four the way you had been taught to. When you got home after the Games, you got the full story regarding Finnick, and his personality. It was a warning from Cashmere and Gloss to stay away from him.

The next year—last year—you finally got to meet him. It was your first time as a mentor, and even though Gloss had told you he would be watching you like a hawk, he didn’t have time to. He was juggling both tributes to pick up the work that Cashmere usually did with her eyes closed. This is because you weren’t used to the workload.

Needless to say, your mentor's warnings meant nothing.

In the month you spent in the Capitol, you grew close to Finnick. It wasn’t on purpose, honestly you don’t remember how the two of you ended up talking for the first time, much less becoming more than that. Way more than that. Finnick is well aware that he’s handsome, and he’s got the charm to go along with it.

That’s how you ended up in the same bed together, multiple times, until you had to leave the Capitol when your final tribute died. But before you left for the year, Finnick gave you a nasty parting gift. He went straight to Capitol reporters to tell them what you’d done together for the summer.

It was like he couldn’t wait to tear you down, despite the fact that you had done nothing to him.

Thankfully, you can put on a good show. At the train station, with about a hundred cameras and microphones in your face, you’d burst into tears. You claimed that Finnick had harassed you the entire time you were in the Capitol, and he couldn’t take no for an answer. He had threatened to ruin your reputation if you tried to breathe a word of it.

There was a lot of skepticism following your statements, because it’s he-said, she-said business. He pointed his finger at you, and you did the exact same thing without going any lower than he did. It worked out exactly the way you had been hoping it would.

It’s been a pain in the ass to be near him this time around.

This is why you couldn’t just ask the Four mentors to pick a different color. You were forced to change your mind, and you’d decided to go with a light pink, because it was safer. Your whole attention had shifted to that shade of pink for the last half of the week. And it wasn’t until you were on your way out the door to get on the elevator, Gloss asked you what you were wearing, because cerulean had been submitted, not pink.

If he had told you that he had done that for you, neither of you would’ve shown up this late. With the only pair of seats left being squeezed between Enobaria and Finnick.

You can already guess how this is going to go.

“Gloss, I’m sorry.” You start, looking at him. “Please, don’t make me sit next to Finnick.”

“It’s your own fault.” He tells you, starting down the aisle.

You roll your eyes. “I don’t think you understand that you had a part in this too, if you’d told me—”

“(Y/n), it’s your job as a District One mentor to remember to submit your color.” He cuts you off. “I let you slide last year, and you know that this year, you were supposed to handle it.” He stops at the end of the row, holding his hand out. “Now you’ve got to deal with this.”

You grind your teeth slightly, squinting at him, wondering if you’ll get in trouble for strangling someone from your own district. You then take in a breath, giving him a fake smile, and turning to head down the row, toward Finnick. You could be an ass and sit in Gloss’ seat next to Enobaria, but you’re sure that he’ll make you get up and move over.

Finnick glances up at you, meeting your eyes. A smirk plays at the corner of his lip, “I see you’re still breaking rules.”

You ignore him, sitting in your seat, crossing one leg over the other. He’s referring to the color you’re wearing, which is entirely too similar to what he’s wearing. The Capitol will easily be able to distinguish the two different shades, but the districts are a different story.

Gloss sits on your other side. When you turn your head to talk to him, you see that he’s already captured Enobaria’s attention, leaving you to your own devices. You’d jump into the conversation, but Enobaria hasn’t grown to like you quite yet. She prefers Cashmere, because they’d been working together for a couple years.

“Are you really going to give me the silent treatment?” Finnick pouts in a mocking tone, “I thought we had something.”

The back of his forefinger brushes against your thigh. You slap his hand away, glaring at him. “Leave me alone.”

“Why? Are you going to go crying to the cameras again?” He asks. “That was smart of you to do, I wish I’d thought of it myself.”

“You’re not smart enough to.” You mutter. “Keep wishing.”

Finnick doesn’t respond, he doesn’t have time to. The lights overhead dim, signaling that it’s time for the interviews to start. It isn’t until Caesar Flickerman comes on stage, dressed in sunflower yellow, do the lights go fully dark.

This conceals Finnick’s action of twisting his upper body to face you. You eye him out of your peripheral the best you can, leaning away from him slightly. You were stupid to think that you’d get a fairly relaxed evening the night before the Games.

Finnick leans over the arm rest that separates you, getting close to your ear to whisper. Despite the fact that Caesar is loud enough to drown out anything he would have to say.

“I really am sorry.” He whispers. “Let me make it up to you.”

You keep your eyes on Caesar, forcing yourself to listen to the jokes he’s cracking, knowing that he’s leading up to introducing your first tribute. Your thoughts begin to stray when you feel him touching you again, attempting to innocently play with the bottom of your dress.

“Any way you want.” His fingertips dancing on your skin. “I promise I’ll be gentle.”

You grab his wrist, eyebrows drawn in. “Stop.”

“It won’t happen again.” He murmurs. “It’ll stay between me and you.”

You break your eyes away from Caesar to stare into Finnick’s, which are easy to make out in the darkness. “I’m not falling for the same trick twice.”

“It’s not a trick.”

You let go of him. “Enough.”

“We were good together.” He whines a little too loudly. Gloss glances over, but Finnick’s already pretending to be watching the show in front of you.

Finally, Caesar introduces your girl tribute. Gloss looks away.

“How about I take you out to lunch?” Finnick proposes.

You shake your head at him. “Finnick, face it, what we had is nothing more than a fling.” You snap quietly. “I’m the only girl your age, which means I’m your only option, and I’m telling you no.”

“A fling?” Finnick echoes, “No, I saw it as more than that.”

“Right, so what went through your head when you went and told the Capitol that I was a whore last year?” You ask, watching him. Finnick opens his mouth, and then closes it. “That’s what I thought.”

“You’re not going to forgive me for that, are you?”

“Why should I?”

Finnick hums, looking away. He doesn’t speak for several tributes, and just when you begin to think that the conversation is over, he looks over. Right as his boy is coming to the front of the stage.

“You do look gorgeous tonight, I think cerulean is perfect on you.”

You force a smile, “I’ll never wear it again.”

this was part of my 3k celebration!!

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ravenmichaelisstuff · 1 year

Text

Soap keeps the skull balaclava from the Ghost Team.

Soap and Ghost were sent on a mission, quick in and out. Everything went to plan except for one thing. Ghost came back to their assigned car without his mask- instead, his face below the nose was covered with a dirty rag. He looked furious.

"Where is yer..." Soap waved his hand before his face.

"Torn to shit." He tossed the skull front of his mask to Soap, balaclava not attached. Soap managed to gracefully catch it.

"But ye are all right?" Johnny scanned Ghost for any injuries. He didn't find any, but he could see the tension in Ghost's moves.

"Peachy sergeant, now get in the car. We need to get to the safe house."

Soap decided not to pry and got in the car.

***

Soap looked at Simon the whole ride. Not because he was exploiting the fact that Ghost had a lot of his pretty face showing, but because he was worried. Their usual car rides since the eventful ride from Las Almas were filled with Soap's banter and Ghost's dry dad jokes. Now Soap was convinced he was going to be decapitated the second he would make any noise with how pissed Ghost looked.

"Do you have a problem, MacTavish?" He growled out. Turns out looking at him wasn't his best idea either.

"Ye should take that stinky rag off your face Lt."

"I won't be showing you my face."

"First of all, I have seen it already. Two, it's not even about that. This looks lik' ye pulled it from the devil's bahookie crack, I can smell it here and you have it in yer face."

Ghost looked like he was considering Soap's words. "It does rake." He responded finally.

"Well then, take it off!" He flung his arms.

Ghost's grip on the steering wheel tightened. "I can't."

"Come on, Lt. me seeing your face can't be that bad-"

"It's not even about you, Johnny." Ghost interrupted, looking resigned. "I don't mind."

Soap was confused. "Then why...?"

"I don't mind you looking. Everyone else is a different story. I am a different story."

"Oh." That wasn't the response Soap expected. He felt warmth dripping down his neck. The Scotsman immediately softened.

"Yeah, "oh"." Ghost's voice was raspy.

"But now there is only me, Simon."

"You, me, and the rear-view mirror. And we will be at the safe house with others in 30 minutes. I can't have them look at me." Ghost was whispering. He looked focused on the road, but Soap saw the nervous tapping of his gloved hands on the wheel.

"Tis' that bad, huh?" Soap pondered. No pity or mockery behind it. Ghost just nodded slightly.

They drove like that for a while, when suddenly Soap lit up and started patting around his tactical vest's pockets. "Ha! Knew I brought it!"

Ghost looked at him from the corner of his eye. He saw Soap holding out a balaclava to him, the exact same one he gave him months ago. Ghost was so dumbfounded that Soap had to grab the steering wheel to prevent them from crushing.

"Simon!" He regained his focus on the road and took the peace of fabric from Soap, placing it on his legs.

"You kept it."

"Yep, so now ye have something to wear."

"Why did you keep it?"

"Don't know honestly, felt important, lucky even."

"Really?"

"Yeah, whenever you are with me I make it out in one piece. Bringing the balaclava gives me at least a feeling of you covering my six, ye know?"

Ghost was probably too overwhelmed to process all this information, so he just pulled over and switched the rag with the clean balaclava.

On the next mission, everyone has a spare balaclava. Ghost knew it was Soap's doing and he fell for him even harder.

I just wrote what I had sitting on my mind, hope someone enjoyes it <3 I love all the feedback and I have so much fun in this community.

#you all remember the hard mask from the begining #soap kept it to #ghost #simon ghost riley #ghostsoap #ghost x soap #ghost cod #john soap mactavish #soap mctavish #soapghost #soap cod #cod soap #soap mw2 #soap x ghost #soft simon riley

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levi-dayne · 2 months

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anyway i have some more proof for my "mello still would've killed himself if he lost to near" theory. special shoutout to @melloneah for giving me input while i talked my head off about this. ur a real one

first of all, this:

his "great and respected predecessor, the man whose actions were a strong influence on me personally." beyond birthday, the second child much like second place mello. the second child, the backup, the second choice who went off the deep end. he could never succeed, bound for failure. and of course, mello goes so far as to say he's trying not to base his analysis of beyond on his own experience. trying, but not succeeding. he takes influence from B because he understands and relates. he knows what it's like to be second best, to feel like a copy. and the "if this was how i felt, i shouldn't even need to say how bad it was before."

then, there's this:

the emphasis on beyond's failure and loss. but then, mello circles it BACK around to "my poor, poor predecessor," which has a strong undertone of mockery, given what we know about mello and how he views failure. and then he says that B must've "longed for death," and offers condolences for the humiliation that he experienced.

obviously, i can't bring up any of this without mentioning mello's introduction to the story where he knows he's going to die and has accepted that.

mello knows he is going to die because he knows his options are a victory by default if near dies or not beating near and surviving, which as i mentioned before, he implies to be embarrassing and not worthwhile. he studies these actions through beyond as he leads himself knowingly up to his death. but he knows what he's doing. that's why he takes off his helmet. he can't and won't live with the failure and shame. he studied where beyond went wrong in his own failsafe suicide attempt so that he wouldn't make it out alive and suffer the same shame and embarassment.

not to mention the phrasing. "died like a dog," according to merriam-webster, is used to describe a dishonorable or shameful death. he acknowledges that through beyond too, with the embarrassment of failing. he knows his own death will shameful, but he also hasn't died yet, which implies his choice in the matter. he chooses to die a shameful death because he believes it's better than feeling his own defeat. he compares himself to beyond repeatedly and admittedly takes inspiration from his actions all the way until the end.

he references the hardest part of killing someone in one of the paragraphs above, which is important because it's a callback to when he says this:

he acknowledges that killing is hard, and in the part where he makes this callback, he says that humans aren't designed to die easily. so he has to do something more extreme to not make beyond's mistakes. something that would keep him from the same embarrassment of surviving when he meant to die. perhaps even something that violates those natural laws of the universe-- oh, wait, wait.

interesting. very interesting.

i also must point out my own personal views on the labb murder cases book. firstly, i do not think it is canon in the sense that everything in it happened. i do think it is how mello personally views the events that unfolded, but despite his denial i do also think it is largely influenced by his own experiences and worldview. there would be no way for him or L to know the exact dialogue that occurred, or anything beyond the major plot points. a lot of it is left open for interpretation, and mello makes up his own dialogue and perspective. was B or misora really anything like how they were depicted in this story? who knows. most of it was made up. and given he expected near to be the first to read it and the only person to care or understand, i think he knew that near would know exactly what that book was.

mello knew he would die, was yet to die, seemed to know how he would die, foreshadowed it, recognized all of the risks of the notebook and yet continued to show his face, and then all of the connections of himself to beyond especially right before acknowledging his suicide attempt as a power move and the humiliation of surviving through failure. he never had any intention of making it out alive. his case study on beyond was truly an analysis on himself. the labb murder cases wasn't just a story or a fanfiction, it was a suicide note. one last insight into the complexities of mello's mind, and perhaps most importantly, he gets the last word.

edit: i also just realized the full title is "death note: another note the los angeles bb murder cases" but none of the other death note books are called "another note" because the rest of them are not notebooks or notes. but this is. mello says he doesn't want it to be a novel, but it's because it's intended to be a suicide note and that EVEN IF IT TURNS INTO A NOVEL it is always a suicide note first and foremost.

#tw suicide #mello #mihael keehl #labb murder cases #death note #death note another note #mello death note #death note mello #dn mello #mello dn #deathnote mello #mello deathnote #dn #deathnote

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eldritch-spouse · 2 months

Note

Livius slipping into the body of an actress with a catty attitude at a red carpet/awards ceremony, fully intending to cause a scene. He gets obsessed not with the actress but with her stressed out assistant.

She is fretting, readjusting the actress's dress and putting on some last minute adjustments to her look before she's on the carpet, and begging her not to stir any shit up at the event.

I know you and an the other two nominees for best actress don't get along but please be civil ma'am.

TW: Gore; Non-consensual demonic possession.

His plan was simple.

Cause a scandal.

Sometimes he does this kind of thing for fun, other times, he has the pleasure of doing it as a service from a formal agreement. You'd be surprised how many celebrities fish contacts to reach his Ring, to reach Lavineum the Envious. Really, him and Rinx have crossed paths on the surface more than once. Sometimes even Cero is looming by.

People just can't resist a bit of a hellish push to success, can they?

Every week, there's a new pretty face around the corner, some halfwit thinking they're going to make it big, a loser, a pawn, a dolly- People who let it all get to their heads and then, suddenly, one day, making a deal with an unfathomable force seems acceptable.

It just so happened that Livius' current patron is one rival of the gorgeous 32 year old whose body he's currently snug inside, wearing Ms Isabella like a glove. She wasn't particularly hard to get a hold of, most of these movie stars are pretty air-headed. He had her silent and dormant in less than a full minute.

He looks at himself in the mirror, combing over her extravagant dress that's honestly bright enough to kind of bother his sight. The woman's raven locks flow from her shoulders, and he twirls a lock the exact same way she does when in deep though. A practiced smile falls on that screen-friendly face as he switches through a few of her usual expressions.

Piece of cake. She's not very nuanced to Livius, as insulting as it may sound.

When the click of someone entering the room is heard, Livius straightens, then adopts Isabella's usual impatient stance, arm on her left hip, an intense gaze cast to you, the woman assisting this actress. Honestly, he doesn't know how well you get paid, but it can't be enough to justify dealing with Miss "I'm fluent in three languages and so much better than you-" on a regular basis.

" ... Ma'am? " You squint.

" Yes, what is it? " He snaps back the same tone you're probably used to hearing by now. The woman's slight Italian accent flows easily on the tongue.

" I asked you to sit down please, we still need some last minute adjustments. "

Livius glances at you once more before doing as told.

You're very pretty. It's almost odd that he's possessing the celebrity here, yet you have such a sweet little smile and eyes so full of hope that you could easily make it out there in the same areas as the woman you're working under. Maybe that's why she's so rude to you at times. Livius sits in the lush little chair in front of several mirrors and forgets that perhaps he's been staring at you for a little too long, because you shiver eventually.

He needs to be cautious, his gaze isn't like the vacuous glare this woman spares most people, it's something a lot more invasive and whole. When Livius stares, he sees.

Before you can ask if everything is alright, he diverts. " Go on, we don't have all day. "

And the way you jump has him muffling a smile. " Y- Yes, of course! "

As you get closer, the demonlord gets to sense your smell, your perfume rather, but there's a hint beneath that can only be yours alone. He'd be able to gouge it better if not for his host's own disgustingly overpowering, acidic crime of a perfume. Nevertheless, he's much too still while you work, observing every little thing you do. How your fingers twitch, where you lean to, which way your head tends to tilt, the expression you make when you're concentrated.

In fact, he likes that frowning puckered lip look so much that he subconsciously puts it on himself. And you notice, of course.

" Hahah... " You pause, heat rising on your cheeks. " I know, it's silly. You got me. "

Livius is very glad you took it as a joke rather than the amateur slip up it actually was.

When you continue, he schools himself a bit better, forcing himself to relax a little so he's not hyper-focused on studying you. He ponders on the steps he'll take to complete his deal, the most amount of damage he can make to this woman involves flickering through some of her insecurities, her lowest moments and most repugnant thoughts. The core of what makes her human, her disgusting sinuous vein.

Unfortunately, it's more than a little difficult to remain focused with you so close to him. As you shift the woman's luxurious necklace, he feels your small fingers brush against the expanse of her neck, a pleasant tingle up her scalp, the scent of you largely demanding of his attention. You're the type of person he could hold onto forever. It's a shame he's in the middle of a task, because Livius would much rather dwell inside of you at this moment.

This increasingly loud hum begins rocking his chest as the demonlord sways, enjoying the care and sighing while digits adjust earrings. And everything is right in the world, no thought spared to what time and day it is. Until...

The touch vanishes, the extra warmth recedes, Livius is bereft and irritated.

" E- Excuse me, ma'am? "

His eyes snap open.

Livius had been rumbling for a while. Oopsie.

He gets to see your eyes flicker from him, so full of confusion and doubt, to the wide mirror directly behind Isabella. And what you see there makes the color drain from your whole body. Your fear is palpable and thick, like the lump in your throat as you struggle to get in enough air to scream.

Scream like a wild animal, at the top of those itty bitty lungs.

What a wonderful melody. There are other ways he'd like to make you scream, now that he thinks about it. You're just a lot of fun, for some reason.

" Is something wrong? " He mirrors some of your own terror.

All you do is point at the mirror, taking a step back and trying -Failing- To steady your breathing.

He doesn't need to look back to know what's happened. You're seeing him. The actual him.

Instead, said mirror just bursts into a million shards, the force with which it's broken sends pieces flying through the room, your pitiful self cowering and shielding your face as you gasp and sob in shock.

" Oh my... " He starts, knowing damn well that more than a few of those shards have embedded themselves in Isabella's back. She must look like a porcupine, hah.

Livius turns around and pretends to care about the situation, thumbing over the mess he made, watching her bleed just a bit more from the brand new razor-thin blades that cut their way into her digits.

He hears you gasp tremulously somewhere behind him.

Livius allows her visage to distort, senses his sharp grin crawl up cheeks that straighten and elongate to accommodate it, his eyes force her skin to stretch with unpleasant zips of flesh as her eyelids fail to transform in time. He's getting a touch too excited.

" I don't think they'll mind too much, right? " He mocks, Isabella's attractive accent melting into his standard ragged demonic tenor.

The first thing that spins back is her neck, then her body, Livius stretching within the human's physical limits. When her arms and legs elongate, her form expanding into something strained and twisted, Livius sighs in momentary relief.

" Oh God... " You sniffle, legs unsteady, held up only by the opposite wall's support.

" Oh God... " Livius mimics fondly, loving the sound of it.

A click echoes, the room is now locked firmly. You seem to be silently making peace with certain death.

" You know- " The demonlord begins, swatting locks of bothersome curly hair away as he leisurely walks towards you. " In all these years you've worked for me, I realize I haven't gotten to know you all that well. "

You only shake and brokenly gasp when Isabella's bloated, clawed fingers make contact with your shoulder.

" Isn't that a shame? "

Livius chuckles at the small whimper you let out when he pulls your figure closer to his, swaying both of your forms calmly.

" But we still have a bit of time, I reckon. So why not tell me a bit about yourself, hm? "

It's not as if you're leaving the room until you humor him anyway.

#Livius oc

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definitelynotshouting · 8 months

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dance au you say 👀👀👀 is it like Grian and Scar typically do different styles of dance but are for some reason partnered together or do they dance the same style and gotta choreograph a routine together but kinda buttheads with how they choreograph

Not quite, although thats a super cool idea!!! :D my au is about Grian asking Scar for dance lessons while preparing for an event he's been invited to-- he's expected to dance, and has never really applied himself to learn more than the very basics until now.

Scar, however, is an excellent dancer and offers to teach him, builds them an intricate gazebo to learn in, shows up to their first lesson in an immaculate new suit, and proceeds to unintentionally but enthusiastically seduce Grian-- who's had a crush for a long time, but hasn't yet gotten up the courage to do anything about it.

The penultimate scene goes a little something like this:

Grian asks Scar for one last practice session before the event. He doesn't even need to feign nervousness-- he's practically sweating bullets. But practicing isnt really his motivation here; in all honesty, he just wants to spend one more time in Scar's arms.

It's evening, golden and sticky with summer, and they're dancing as the sun slowly begins to set. Scar's complimenting, hyping him up, telling him he's a natural now, he'll do so great. He'll be rooting for him at the event the ENTIRE time. The jukebox's music fades, and the dance ends with a flourish, and Grian finds himself nose to nose with a Scar who is gazing at him like he's everything.

Then Scar seems to shake himself, disengages, and gently tells him he'll do great. Amazing, even. The envy of the dance floor. They both step back at the same time.

But the sun is hitting Scar's face just right, and he's gorgeous, and Grian just had him in his arms, and-- and-- and--

Grian impulsively darts forward and kisses the life out of him, fast and a little messy, with his heart beating right out of his chest. And then in true Grian fashion, he freaks out about his own impulsivity and flies away without addressing ANY of this bc he Cant Be Normal Ever, leaving poor Scar to stare off into the sunset with his hand pressed absently against his lips.

What follows after that is some very strained event participation on Grian's part, and Scar trying desperately to talk to him while Grian dodges him like his life depends on it. Eventually, Grian gets exhausted by it all and takes a moment to recoup by wandering outside for some fresh air.

This is where Scar finds him; a little cold, a bit shivery, feeling VERY sorry for himself, and finally Grian doesn't have the patience or energy to run any longer. I actually wrote out a tiny snippet of this scene:

"You know, you're, uh, awful slippery when you want to be." Scar's voice is deceptively casual. "You've gotta teach me that vanishing trick sometime." "Grow wings," Grian suggests wryly, then sobers, pulling Scar's jacket a little tighter around his shoulders. "Sorry. For— that. Yesterday. Yeah." "Sorry you did it? Or sorry it happened?" "Scar," Grian says, pained, "you just said the exact same thing twice." "Not really." Scar's voice is quiet, contemplative. He still isn't looking at Grian when he speaks. "'Cause, y'know, there's— I mean, dancing is pretty intimate, right? Plenty of opportunity for things to just... happen, without them meaning to. It's pretty common, really." He's giving Grian an out, he realizes. An escape hatch left wide open, a gaping crevice Grian can slip through without snagging his feathers. He could lie, right here and right now, and Scar is telling him that would be okay. Everything could go back to normal. Maybe its the atmosphere. Maybe it's the night air, a cool caress on his face, and the moon rising high and bright in the sky above them. A waxing growth that limns them both in pretty silver, catching on the edges of Scar's profile. He's beautiful, as always, and as much as Grian's stomach trembles, he can't tear his eyes from the sight of him. "More like I'm sorry for ruining a perfectly good friendship," Grian croaks at last. Scar blinks, lips parting briefly, throat bobbing as he swallows. His gaze lowers slowly, until his lashes paint dark lines against his cheeks. "Who says it got ruined?" he finally asks. "Scar, I kissed you," Grian says miserably, huddling further into himself. "Yeah, that was kinda hard not to notice." "Scar." "What? It's true! I was there, I saw it!" Oddly, there's the hint of a smile threading into Scar's voice; when he turns to pin Grian's gaze, it reflects on his lips, tilted up the tiniest fraction. In the moonlight, his eyes almost glow. "But sure, lets assume you've ruined a friendship. Which you have not, by the way— in case you were wondering." All the air leaves Grian's lungs at once. He's paralyzed, tipping over the knife's edge of something only Scar can see. "I didn't?" "Nah." Scar's voice is achingly warm now. "Not even close. Actually, my only question right now is: do you wanna do it again?"

Anyway they smooch again and get catcalled by their friends and Grian dips Scar bc Scar deserves to get dipped and its very sweet bc sometimes u rlly do just need some low stakes pining THEE END❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

#scarian #goodtimeswithscar #grian #hermitcraft #hermitshipping #shouting speaks #asks #mcyt #my aus #my snippets #ITS A VERY SWEET SILLY LITTLE AU THAT MAYBE ONE DAY I WILL WRITE #but until then. here is a REALLY brief summary of it djdbdjdndjdj #long post #txt

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idyllic-affections · 8 months

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how abt a scenario where big brother!kaeya comforts his little sibling who’s going through a hard time mentally and maybe has abandonment issues and fears that kaeya will leave them too

stormy nights.

summary. stormy nights are the hardest to bear.

trigger & content warnings. abandonment issues, general themes of anxiety, and implied past abandonment.

tropes, pairings, fic length, & other notes. comfort. kaeya & younger sibling!reader. 0.7k words. they/them pronouns used for reader.

author's thoughts. i needed something to post since i'm working on lengthy requests at the moment, so i settled on fulfilling this older one! i love kaeya sm.... i'm not complety content with how this came out but i'm posting it nonetheless because i am in the process of unlearning my nitpicky habits. is it the same quality as my usual writing? nope! but that's fine. not everything will always be 100% up to whatever imaginary standard i have set for myself and there is not a single thing wrong with that.

Rain, in their mind, was a pleasant type of weather... for the most part, anyway. There was nuance.

It depended on the exact type of rain. A simple shower, a little bit of rainfall... that was pleasant. Relaxing, even. The way the droplets would tap repeatedly against the tiles of their roof brought a sense of comfort and calmness into their home. It quieted their mind. It was a serene pattern that had the capacity to lull them to sleep if they were in the right position. Sometimes they'd even stand outside in the gentle rain, paying no mind to the way it dampened their clothes and skin. It was inexplicably soothing.

However, thunderstorms were a different beast entirely.

The flashes of light, the clap of thunder in the distance or sometimes even scarily within their vicinity...

Thunderstorms never sat well with them. Ever since they were but a small, vulnerable child, such horrible rain made a sense of dread settle in their gut. They were drenched in such frigid, violent rain once; the memory alone made their skin crawl and their muscles ache. Thunderstorms simply didn't sit well with them. They brought up too many gut-wrenching memories.

It reminded them of being abandoned by their father.

It reminded them of Diluc and Kaeya's falling out.

It reminded them of all the shitty things that'd ever happened to them, really. All of their major life events were accompanied by thunderous rain. The universe enjoyed mocking them, it seemed, for regardless of the circumstances, heavy rain always signalled bad.

Thunderstorms made anxiety settle uncomfortably in the pit of their stomach.

Given that fact, it was no surprise that they spent the past hour tossing and turning, trying to fall asleep in spite of their uncontrollable panic. When the frustration finally boiled over like an unsupervised pot on the stove, they huffed, throwing their blanket off of their body with uncharacteristic aggression and got up. There was little use in trying to sleep. They obviously couldn't, so they may as well go find something else to do. Something to pass the time until Kaeya got home or until the rain stopped—whichever happened first.

It was with quiet steps that they treaded out of their room. They weren't quite sure where they were headed or what they were exactly planning on doing at this hour. Maybe they'd get a snack from the kitchen and sit in the living room for a while? Anything would do, they supposed. Anything that didn't involve trying to sleep.

To their suprise, which quickly faded into relief, Kaeya was home, drying himself off with a towel that he had probably gotten from the closet. Some of their anxiety melted away almost immediately when his gaze landed on them.

"K— Kae..." they murmured, barely above the volume of a delicate whisper that undoubtedly was drowned out by the rain and thunder. They were quick to wipe away the tears welling up in their eyes. Hopefully, the dim atmosphere kept the Cavalry Captain from noticing (deep down, they knew better; Kaeya was always so observant when it came to them and their needs). They cleared their throat, speaking with more conviction so that they could certainly be heard over the weather: "When... um, when did you get here? You usually don't come home for a while longer."

"I came as soon as it started raining," he admitted, beckoning them closer, to which they gladly complied. They sincerely hoped he didn't take note of the sheer speed with which they ran to be in his embrace. If he did, he said nothing of it. Their head came to rest on his chest. Kaeya caringly raised a hand to their cheek, tenderly brushing his thumb over their cheekbone. His freehand ran up and down their spine soothingly. "You've never been one to sleep through the rain. Ever since you were little, you could never sleep if it rained too hard.

"But... you're... you're busy, aren't you?" they wondered, feeling their eyes begin to burn as tears started to well up once again. They did their best to blink those tears away. "You can't drop everything for me."

"Indeed I can, I did, and I will continue to do so."

"Kaeya..."

"Shh," he hushed, leaning down to press a gentle kiss on the crown of their head, smoothing down the unkempt stands no doubt caused by their tossing and turning. "It's fine. Don't worry about it. Jean understands."

It was quiet for a moment. Then, they sniffled.

"Don't leave me."

"I plan on doing no such thing."

please consider reblogging, it helps me out quite a lot!

#aphelion's drabbles 🌸#favoniuslibrary #astronetwrk #genshin platonic #platonic genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #platonic genshin impact #platonic genshin #platonic genshin x reader #kaeya x reader

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sirenjose · 4 months

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Norton is Alive in the Final Game

This is going to be less of an organized post and more just a collection of points. I wanted to post a theory I wrote about Time of Reunion here based on quoththeowl31's request, but I wrote the original theory right after the event (I needed hope) and it's been quite some time since then. I would've felt guilty just copy pasting it here considering how long its been, but I didn't have the energy to make it nice and neat. So I'm just going to take the important points from my previous theory, revise them based on what info we currently have, and go from there.

(Sorry, I only had the energy to be lazy for this. Hopefully this is good enough for you.)

Alice (Little Girl) is running from Orpheus during Time of Reunion in-game.

She disappears in Da Capo after Orpheus beats up Norton, leaving only her diary behind. The same thing happens at the end of the Time of Reunion event in-game. The diary is left on the ground near where Orpheus lies.

Possible Orpheus scared Alice due to his actions, even if he thought he did it to defend her.

This is the “final game”. No bodies are found except Orpheus’. The fire didn’t consume everything, so if Norton really were dead, his body should be around there somewhere, but it isn’t.

Melly and Alice are never found either, but if they did manage to leave, we’ve heard nothing about them.

(Reusing an idea I read from quoththeowl31 that I really liked)

Little Girl helps other survivors. If Orpheus was Nightmare, that’d mean she’d have to help Norton, Melly, or whoever the 4th survivor is (whether that’s Frederick or otherwise). Novelist was banned in this mode, meaning Little Girl couldn’t support him (and it’s possible this could have been meant to also signify Little Girl didn’t support him in the story either).

Alice is a rescuer. The only person we’ve seen hurt and chaired during the in-game cutscene was Norton. Ergo, it’d be her responsibility to rescue him.

Norton is a survivor built to harass the hunter (and potentially by-time for others/help others escape from the hunter), while Melly is built for kiting and running. This could explain why Norton is the one who is the one wounded during Time of Reunion

Norton and Melly, each time they appear as hunters during the animations, are always reaching towards Little Girl aka Alice, not Orpheus.

Norton was using the axe to break the door to the room Orpheus had locked himself and the girl in. The axe disappears right after he makes a big enough hole, meaning Norton didn’t intend to use it to hurt either of them.

Melly in Alice’s diary was said to be trying to persuade Alice to leave, but she refuses due to not finding the answer she’s looking for yet.

If Alice/Little Girl knew Norton and Melly were trying to help her, she likely would’ve sided with them. That could also be why she disappears after Orpheus beats up Norton (as well seeing how Orpheus truly is/how messed up he is). Or she disappeared so Orpheus, upon losing sight of her, she’d be freed and could help Norton without Orpheus stopping her.

Orpheus isn’t a reliable perspective. The memories we’re seeing are because of the Hydra drug, which “rebuilds” memories. “Rebuild” rather than “regain” or “remember” means the “rebuilt” version can look the exact same as the original, but it’s also possible for it to somewhat differ from the original version. For example, the memories Hydra gives Orpheus has Orpheus being chased by Nightmare, which we know is impossible as Orpheus is Nightmare, as well as shows Alice as Little Girl rather than her actual, present day version as Alice the Journalist. (Similar to what happens to Sora during Kingdom Hearts: Chain of Memories.)

There are inconsistencies in the animation, which can help show that it, like the Time of Reunion event in-game, isn’t the exact truth. Besides Alice appearing as Little Girl rather than Journalist Alice, as well as how we can see hallucinations exist considering we see Melly and Norton appearing as hunters, but we know this is a hallucination as, for example, after Orpheus punches Melly, we see the real Melly briefly afterwards.

Norton doesn’t have his signature burn scar over his eye

Norton doesn’t have his nose piercing

Only Orpheus and Little Girl are in color. Norton and Melly are in black and white.

Only Orpheus and Little Girl have real eyes. Norton has button eyes.

Norton isn’t fighting back. When Orpheus tries to punch him a 2nd time, Norton actually grabs his hand, struggles to keep him still while Orpheus continues to try to attack him, and then grabs Orpheus’ other hand when he tries to swing that at Norton too. In the second or so that Orpheus can’t attack, we see Norton trying to say something to Orpheus, but Orpheus isn’t listening and continues to attack. Norton this whole time hasn’t made any moves to attack Orpheus himself.

The strange scene where Melly is hiding in a locker, Norton touches something on the floor, walks over to the locker, shakes it once, hits it once, shakes it one more time, then runs out. It’s kind of nonsensical. If he was running from something, we’d see Norton moving quicker and more furiously, yet the nonchalant way he goes about his business before slowly walking to the locker says otherwise. Right after this, Melly opens up a trapdoor once Norton leaves. It’s possible Norton’s actions were a signal to Melly, potentially signifying that it was Norton, not Orpheus, and him trying to potentially say Orpheus wasn’t around, and that could’ve been why Melly only opened the trapdoor afterwards. This could mean Melly and Norton are working together, and as both of them seemed to be trying to reach for Little Girl specifically, that could help further prove the idea.

The only time we see Norton and Melly going against each other is when Norton punches Melly and causes her to drop the flashlight that Orpheus then picks up. I think the only reason this happened was because they might’ve known Orpheus was watching and had to pretend. Even when Orpheus firsts locks himself in the room with Little Girl, closing the door right as Hunter Melly appears in front of the door, in a few seconds, we see the axe coming through the door, signifying Hunter Norton is right outside the door now. Both Norton and Melly should be nearby, outside the door, but they’re goal is getting into the room, not fighting each other.

We also see both of them running past Orpheus at about the same time.

There’s also how Melly during Time of Reunion is shown to be using her bees to try to get Orpheus hit and killed by the hunter.

“Da Capo” is a music term and means to “go back to the beginning” of the music. This only happens once, with the second time you reach this symbol it doesn’t repeat, and instead goes to a different measure. This basically seems to symbolize doing things over but reaching a different ending.

Da Capo and redoing something can connect to COA 4, as Highway Cavalier and the others repeatedly die and are forced to redo the race over and over. Highway Cavalier does defeat Molten Hound and win the race in the end, receiving a “powerful life force” as his reward in the end. Molten Hound, who is absorbing the life force of the racers forced to redo the race in loop after loop, can parallel Orpheus as Nightmare, who does something similar with the participants of his experiments. Highway Cavalier obviously parallels Norton, while Melly can parallel Reflective Mirror, someone who at first did not get along with and was on different sides from Norton, but after Norton changes and starts to care, he saves her from dying at one point, and they become allies.

Considering what we know about Alice based on her letter to Orpheus in the 2nd anniversary package, where she says she’s going to save him (Orpheus) this time, she could parallel Pumping Tires, who sacrifices himself for Highway Cavalier to ensure Highway Cavalier can win the race and defeat Molten Hound.

There’s also how the COA 4 races were taking place in Yidhra’s Dreamlands, and Yidhra in canon seems to relate to Oracle and Orpheus’ drugs via the fern, as well as to Darkwoods where the Final Game takes place.

Norton in his 2nd letter was asked to assassinate some female in exchange for a lot of money. Despite this, we see in this letter that he (Hunter Norton/Fool’s Gold) is trying to convince himself (Survivor Norton) to go through with the job and kill the female for the money. This is similar to Norton’s backstory trailer, where we see Norton fighting with himself before he sets off the explosion in Golden Cave. We see him holding his head, as well as both him and his hunter version at the same time, before seeing Fool’s Gold win and cause the explosion.

It’s possible during the Final Game, Norton chose to reject the assassination request and side with Alice instead, similar to Highway Cavalier’s change from selfish to working with others during COA 4 to the point in previous loops he gets himself killed while trying to help them.

Norton in Time of Reunion is shown to be eliminated via chair rather than bleeding out. This means there is a chance he survived. (Orpheus is also shown with scars on his hand from the wires on the rocket chairs, meaning he survived despite being chaired. It’s possible he was rescued, but in-game, if you’re eliminated via chair, it does say “returning to manor”, which could be what happened to Norton).

Little Girl, as well as Nightmare, disappeared because Orpheus forgot about them. Because the gas he released via the valve is shown to have the Dionysus/Mnemosyne symbol, which is the drug that makes a person forget.

Strange split screen during the scene Orpheus attacks Norton. Suspicious we can’t see exactly who the shadows are, even though the left side shows us Orpheus and Norton. Considering we know the hallucination drug can cause people to see someone as something else, it’s possible the fact we can’t see who’s on the right may hint that maybe they aren’t who they seem to be. It’s possible rather than attacking Norton, he’s actually attacking Alice, which could also tie to why she sees him as Nightmare, as well as why Little Girl runs away from Orpheus during the Time of Reunion event.

Orpheus is focused on the past before the tragedy. He is ��looking back”. He also “looks back” after attacking Norton in Da Capo, and when he does, Alice is gone. And like in the original myth, when Orpheus looks back, Eurydice vanishes forever. The fact Alice is gone could mean he did in fact attack her and caused her to disappear despite what he thought he saw.

Last thought. We see Little Girl disappear at the end. And based on Alice’s letter to Orpheus, this seems to echo this. If Yidhra really is involved, what if she made Alice, as well as Norton and Melly, disappear. Similar to what happens to the Lakeside villagers. And potentially similar to what Eli describes in his 4th letter, as he describes “dissipating” just like how we see happen to Little Girl in the animations as well as in-game at the end of Time of Reunion.

As Yidhra’s letters seem to connect her to the fern used in the drugs, as well as to Darkwoods, where the final game is, and where we can find a bonfire that Yidhra’s form can appear in, it’s possible she could’ve made Alice, Norton, Melly, and potentially all the other participants of Orpheus’ game disappear, similar to how she makes the investigators who wander into her territory see the steps to the Dreamlands.

Alice in her letter to Orpheus in the 2nd anniversary package does say “As I gradually regain my consciousness, I’ll find a way to escape from the prison that locks me in”, and though I don’t see how she could write a letter to Orpheus if she had already been sent to the Dreamlands, I still wanted to suggest the idea that the “prison” she refers to is the Dreamlands. In which case, the “hunter” Alice references she could potentially use could be Yidhra: https://www.tumblr.com/sirenjose/738327507924828160/oracle-orpheus-drugs-and-yidhra-theory?source=share.

That or Joseph. Both him and Yidhra seem to be potential solutions: https://www.tumblr.com/sirenjose/737972149259829248/did-joseph-make-the-portraits-are-they-still?source=share.

Joseph is all about saving people from death, which he does by taking a photo of them, causing their souls to be trapped within the photo and their bodies to seemingly go missing. He had a wall of portraits of people that went missing, and we are now getting portraits of survivors for their 5th birthday. In which case, the “prison” Alice references could be that photo, and the hunter she suggested wanting to use could be Joseph.

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