Sunflower, Book 1 Chapter 24

Tom Hiddleston x OFC Series rated: M Chapter warnings: Flashback smut AN: Opps, I seem to have spilled a splash of my daddy issues. Let me mop that right up. Wouldn't do to be splashing that around Sally, now would it? One last fluff before I hurt you.

Masterlist AO3 KoFi ~~~~~<3

Sally sat in the back seat of the car watching the world go by while her mother watched Tom drive. The adults were strange, she knew that much. But her mom had always been a strange one. That’s what made her so much fun!

Mia had always told the little girl that she simply had to be strange in order to be the best mother possible for her. 

The new man in their life was strange too. But they were a good strange together. She liked it when Tom was visiting and hoped he would visit more often. She hoped one day he would do more than just visit. It felt like she had a whole family when he was there. 

It felt like she had a Daddy when Tom was there, just like all the other kids. 

“Momma?” Sally asked, lingering on the thought. “Is Daddy coming today?” 

Mia stiffened in the front seat of the car. That was something she needed to talk to Tom about still. “I texted him where to meet us for cake and presents.” 

“He’s going to come?” Sally asked hopefully.

“He said he would.” Mia added after a thought, “But you know how busy he is. He could get caught up in work or traffic.”

It killed her inside every time she had to tamper down her daughter’s expectations but it was better to cause a little disappointment now than have total heartbreak later. 

Ray had said he would come but that meant very little to Mia. Ray had said he would be there for Thanksgiving and Christmas the year before too but that didn’t make him show up. 

Tom knew Ray was invited but he didn’t know he was potentially meeting his wife’s ex-boyfriend today. It was a bit selfish but he had assumed she hadn’t heard a response back. It wouldn’t have surprised him, he had been married to Mia for a few weeks as of today and as far as he knew, Sally hadn’t had any contact with her father in those weeks.

“Tommy?” 

“Yes, Petel?” Tom answered absently, focusing on the road and following the directions his phone was giving him.

“What do you do for work?”

“I’m an actor.” Tom answered simply, turning down a dirt road. They were almost there now.

“What’s that?” Mia smiled at Sally’s question.

“It means I get paid to play pretend so other people can watch it.”

“In movies?” Sally leaned forward in her seat. “For real?” 

“Yep, in movies. And TV shows, for real.” Tom enjoyed her simple amazement.

“A lot of them?” Sally asked. 

“I did four movies this year.” Getting to brag about his career to a newly five year old shouldn’t have made him this proud but it did. Oh boy, it made him as proud as it did to tell his own mother. Glancing over to Mia, he took in the look of surprise on her face. “I didn’t get a Marvel contract totally out of nowhere.”

“Like, in the movie theaters?” Sally asked.

Tom chuckled at the question. “Only one here so far. It’s in theaters right now ”

“Can I watch it?” Sally asked.

“It’s not really for little kids but maybe I’ll show you some clips from it tonight if your mom thinks it’s okay. It’s a superhero movie and I play the bad guy.”

“But you’re not a bad guy!” Sally was enthralled with the idea. “You don’t look like a bad guy!” 

Tom laughed, commenting on the magic of movies.

“What about me?” Mia asked. “Can I watch it?” 

“If you want?” Tom was surprised. 

Mia had stayed away from the topic of his work for a lot of their conversations. He never considered that she was putting on a show of disinterest. He had assumed she simply didn’t care to know more.

“Will you take mommy to the movies on a date?” Sally piped up from the back, dissolving into a fit of giggles over the idea. 

“Sure will.” Tom winked at Mia as she blushed. Finding her hand with his, he pulled it to his lips while focusing mostly on the road and placed a slight kiss on the knuckles. Sally ‘awed’ from the back and giggled some more as she watched her favorite fairytale play out. 

Mia wasn’t sure she could survive a day out and about if Sally was going to encourage Tom’s antics. The day was already in danger of feeling far too much like a day out with her boyfriend than some guy she’s only known for weeks.

Was that such a bad thing though? After a few weeks, wasn’t it okay for her to consider their level that of a early boyfriend level? What if it was okay?

~~~~~<3

They pulled up to a ranch and parked. Horses grazed on hay bales scattered around the desert grass pastures. 

“Tell me you didn’t buy her a pony.” Mia demanded threw clenched teeth and a forced smile.

“I didn’t buy her a pony.” Tom whispered in her ear as he wrapped an arm around her waist. This wasn’t on the list of possible activities he had run by Mia. “I bought a family pony ride and lessons. Is that better?”

Mia relaxed and let a smile slip, “Much.” 

Sally was eager to meet the horses and soaked up every instruction given with rapt attention. They were each given their own instructor and each worked on very different things, matching their abilities and age. 

Tom mostly acted as a tool for the instructors to demonstrate positioning and movements with. Mia could see his head grow three sizes under their praise and fawning even at a distance.

He had a foundation of riding though of a whole different style. Mounting on the bulky western saddle was awkward for Tom who was used to the sleeker English saddle. It was disorientating to be in a western saddle with so much between him and the horse. He had quickly become a proficient rider while working on War Horse but everything felt different with the different saddle, making him feel somewhat like he was bumbling along. 

When he accidentally kicked the horse into a trot trying to get a little more get up and go out of him, he found himself getting uncomfortably close with the horn on the front of the saddle.

That’s fine, he told himself as the pain caused him to lean forward, bracing on the horn and groaning in pain, trying not to double over. He wasn’t using that for a good while longer still it seemed anyway anyway. 

Sally’s giggles carried far as she was walked around the large arena, unaware of the pain Tom was in. The instructor was leading her mule through a lumbering slow walk as she instructed Sally on different ways to hold her arms and practice her balance. 

Between him and Sally was Mia. She was a sight on the mule she had been assigned. Sure, he had booked horseback lessons but they had said the mules were better for first timers. Looking down at his own mount’s short horse ears, he was feeling a bit left out of the long eared club. 

They were a cross between horse and donkey, the instructors had lectured. Tom soaked up the information as they were tacking up. It fascinated him that crossing the two resulted in such a functional animal, superior in some ways. They had learned that mules were far more hardy than horses, able to carry more for longer and less prone to losing weight. They ate fine on the desert grasses of Nevada and even tended to live longer. 

Mia was instantly in love with her assigned mule. Tom was pretty sure she’d have fallen for any mount assigned but kept that to himself as he took pictures of her rubbing ears and kissing snoots with the sun lighting up the warm gold in her brown waves. She shone like a beautiful sunflower in the desert. It was a picture he never wanted to forget. 

As she rode, the soft breeze played in the waves that spilled out under her helmet. Tom was struck again by how beautiful she was. It was something that floored him time and time again.

“I wish someone would look at me that way.” The instructor’s voice brought him back to reality. He hadn’t realized he had gotten lost in the view and came to a total stop. “How long have you two been married?” 

“Few weeks.” Tom answered. 

“Newlyweds.” The instructor smiled as she set out a course of cones. “I hope someday someone looks at me with that much love. She’s lucky.” 

“I’m the lucky one.”

~~~~~<3

Mia hated to admit that Tom had made a good call. Sally had loved the lesson and even more offensive to her, she had enjoyed it too. Sally was already asking for more lessons and Tom, having learned his lesson well, was noncommittal, leaving it in Mia’s hands to give a final ruling on, though he was sure he could swing it. 

He would have loved nothing more than to book a lesson package for the both of them but with Mia’s ever changing schedule, it wasn’t something he could take the lead on even if he wanted to brave Mia’s wrath. Mia put the idea down, at least for now. She feared having Sally get invested in a hobby and then not being able to continue it.

~~~~~<3

Tom was quick to change into his swim trunks when they returned to the apartment. He washed the horse dirt off his hands, arms, face, and neck then called it good. 

“I’m going to go set up.” He yelled through the apartment, waiting for acknowledgement before closing the door behind him. 

Sally was taking a quick shower while Mia gathered what few pool toys they had. Tom had already taken down the inflatable toys and the pump for inflating them. 

Mia stood in front of the large mirrors and tried to admire herself in her bikini. She wondered if anyone other than models felt good in a bikini. Maybe not even them. Over the years, she had tried to take pride in what her body looked like. The stretch marks that shimmered just above her hips told a story of creation. 

Mia was thankful at least for the under wire in the bikini cups. She couldn’t will her stomach into being perfectly flat or firm but she could prop her breasts up the same way a good bra did.

As Sally called to have the water shut off in the shower, Mia threw on a silk dressing robe. She hardly wore it but it felt good against her skin. She couldn’t wear it in the pool but at least she’d have it to hide in until she got into the water. 

“Is dad here yet?” Sally asked as she wiggled into her swimming suit. 

“Not yet.” Mia didn’t want to tell her that her father hadn’t answered a single text message all day. 

~~~~~<3

Tom arranged balloons and presents on the table. Nothing grand, most purchased either by Mia or with her approval. Tom was able to negotiate his way into buying her a bicycle but that had taken some work on his part. That was no pony but it did have a soft unicorn horn on the little basket hanging from the handle bars and rainbow light up training wheels. 

Mia had told him that Sally didn’t yet know how to ride a bike. In a selfish corner of his heart, he hoped he would be the one that got to teach her. He knew it was something typically considered a father’s task. 

Her father. It was easy for him to forget that Sally did have a father. 

Tom stood up from the table where he arranged the pizzas that had just been delivered as he pondered the man he had hardly given a thought to in the last few weeks. 

Mia had told him that she had inviting Sally’s father so it wasn’t like he was being blindsided. She couldn’t say how much, if anything, he knew about Tom’s presence in their lives though. Mia hadn’t said anything about Tom but the press had pictures of Mia and him together. 

They didn’t know how he would react finding another man in Sally’s life, planning birthday parties and buying bikes. Tom selfishly took pride in the fact that, at least in his eyes, he was filling a role Sally’s father had left vacant already, even if in such small ways. 

He wanted to fill that role in much bigger ways too. 

Tom wanted very much to drop everything and call his mother for advice. She would know how to navigate this situation, he felt it in his bones. His brain though, ever so much more logical knew that the odds of his mother being able to help him navigate the relationship between his wife’s ex-boyfriend, himself and his step daughter in America were minimal at best. 

~~~~~<3~~~~~<3~~~~~<3~~~~~<3~~~~~<3

The sounds of her moans as he moved within her were sweeter than any wine he had ever drank. She was surrounded by him and him, by her. The scent of her shampoo was thick as he rested his head against her shoulder for a moment. 

He was panting as he focused on staying up right. This wouldn’t be his best performance, he knew that. Later, he would make it up to her. Now he was chasing his need and just hoping he hit the right spots. By the sounds she made, he wasn’t doing a half bad job of it at least. 

He peppered her shoulder with wet kisses as he reached down to hook her leg with his arm, pulling it higher and changing the angle of her pelvis.

“Oh, fuck.” He moaned as a deeper moan poured from her throat. Whatever he did, it was good for them both. 

~~~~~<3 Tag List: @winterisakiller @alexakeyloveloki @jennyggggrrr @dangertoozmanykids101 @tilltheendwilliwrite @tinchentitri @wizardcherryblossom @kats72 @buttercupcookies-blog @violethaze @soulpiercing @evedia @princess-ofthe-pages

"To The Ends of The Earth"

Word Count: TBD / ongoing

Content Warnings: none, follows the events from The Hobbit so there will be the expected violence from the movies

Pairings: KilixOC

Themes: crossover Marvel x Tolkien, romance, fanfic, canon-ish events

Summary:

In the wake of The Blip, the multi-verse has expanded knowledge of the universe in ways no one thought possible. For the first time, journeying between realms and realities is a tangible possibility.

Ex-SHIELD agent and Avenger, Lilith Lenore, is hiding from her past, shunning the life she once led. But when an offer from a wizard of another world is extended, she cannot refuse.

Chapter 6: Blunt the Knives

Dinner with dwarves was an experience. Despite the plates, cups, and cutlery they’d set the table with, most of them opted for pulling food directly from the table and shoveling it into their mouth, sans utensils. Rolls, potatoes, and cuts of meat flew from each end of the table as they took turns catching things in their mouths, roaring with laughter at each miss and cheering at each success. Between bites they washed the half chewed food down with ale. They drank sloppily and it spilled down their beards and onto their laps. It was a raucous, rowdy mess. I should have probably found it more off putting than I did. Instead, I found myself giggling at first, and later laughing loudly right along with them. Despite their lack of table manners, their joy was contagious. Their antics proved to be amusing, rather than annoying. 

I’d been seated at the table beside Kili, and in addition to the distractions of the dwarves I’d also been plagued with questions from him about myself and where I was from. I had become a very guarded person over the years. With my past in particular, I often found it necessary to put up walls. It made things easier, not allowing myself to have connections or relationships. I was surprised at how quickly Kili was able to break the ice and make me feel at ease. I’d always been hesitant to bond with anyone, and the few friends I did make back home had clawed their way past my walls and into my innermost being. Within only a few hours, the young dwarf had charmed me with his wit and humor. I found myself entirely engrossed in our conversation. 

“So by far away, you really mean-” He started.

“Far, far away.” I confirmed, laughing. I’d just finished explaining the concept of my universe existing in an alternate timeline as theirs to the best of my ability. He seemed to understand, but he was also a bit intoxicated so I couldn’t be sure. Regardless he nodded along as I explained, seeming fascinated by the tales of a far away land.

I wasn’t entirely sure how much detail I was supposed to give. I didn’t know if divulging the secrets of the universe to people who had no idea it existed so far beyond their own world would cause issues. But Gandalf had not told me otherwise, and Kili was hard to say no to.

“And Gandalf brought you all the way here? To help us?” 

I nodded.

“It appears so.” 

He put a hand over his heart, feigning shock. 

“I’m truly honored, Lady Lilith. A visitor from another realm, come to help us lowly dwarves.” His stoney face broke instantly, his true grin cracking through his attempt at being serious. He giggled despite his best effort to mask it, and I found myself giggling along with him. I could tell he was getting tipsy, although not quite as sloppy drunk as some of the other dwarves at the table were. 

He cleared his throat and switched back to a rigid face, his lips twitching at the corners with a grin that desperately wanted to break through. 

“But,” he continued, trying his best to keep the serious expression. “I’m afraid I have to ask for your qualifications, miss. What exactly makes you worthy to join the company of Thorin Oakenshield?” 

“Ah, lets see.” I started, twirling my empty mug around the end of my finger. “I’ve saved my own world at least six times that I can count. Stopped the Chitauri from absolutely wasting New York City. Fought a tyrannical robot and his army. Went back in time and stopped a madman from outer space from wiping out half of the universe. I can go on.” 

He sat in silence for a moment, expressionless. I couldn’t tell if he didn’t believe me, didn’t understand, or just didn’t know what to make of it all. 

“I haven’t the slightest clue what any of that means.” He said finally, his giggles breaking through as he allowed a toothy grin to form once again. 

I felt the corners of my own lips begin to turn up in response. It was nearly impossible for me to get drunk, thanks to the serum. I’d begun to feel the faintest buzz after my third glass. If the ale was strong enough to have an effect on me, I could understand why most of the dwarves were falling off of their chairs after a few drinks. I was grateful for the small amount of confidence it had given me in this unfamiliar world. 

“Well which part interests you the most?” I asked, setting my glass down on the table and turning my body fully to face him. “I will do my best to explain.” 

“The shit- chit- the chittery?” 

“Chitauri.” I corrected, emphasizing the pronunciation.

“Right, start there.” 

“WHO WANTS AN ALE?” 

Fili stood at the end of the table, with several overflowing mugs in his hands. The dwarves around me began holding up their hands, reaching out for him to give them a glass. I looked down at my empty mug, debating whether or not I needed another. Despite the faint buzz I was feeling, I knew it wouldn’t last. Steve and I had often attempted to test the limits while we were bored and on the run, and we’d only succeeded in getting truly intoxicated once. Even then, it was only after we’d nearly wiped out a pub’s liquor supply. One more couldn’t hurt. 

I raised my hand as well, and Fili’s face lit up in response. 

“Alright lass, coming right up.” 

I expected him to walk around the table, or pass the glass down the line of dwarves toward me. Instead he hopped up on the tabletop, stepping around the mugs and overflowing platters of food to tiptoe to where I sat.

“‘Ere you are.” He said, handing me the glass. 

As I took it from his outstretched hand he leaned in and smashed his own mug into mine, spilling ale across the table and all over the dwarves beside me. He tipped his glass back and began to down the entire thing, still standing atop the table in front of me. I looked at Kili and shrugged before following suit, downing my entire glass as well. Fili and I finished at the same time and I heard Kili and the other dwarves cheer in encouragement.

After giving Kili my best explanation as to what the Chitauri were and how we’d defeated them, I stood from the table and began to gather a few empty mugs, plates, and other dishes. Bilbo had calmed down somewhat, but he still paced nervously in the entry rather than coming to sit and enjoy dinner with the rest of us. I hoped by straightening up a bit I could put him at ease. 

Bilbo’s kitchen was just as cozy, and impossibly small, as the rest of the home was. I ducked my head to avoid smashing into the threshold as I crossed to the sink and began rinsing off the dishes. 

“We’re a bit much, aren’t we?” 

I whirled around in search of the voice, and found Kili standing in the doorway. He was smiling at me, holding his own empty mugs and dishes. 

“It’s not you guys.” I assured him as he crossed the room and handed them to me. “I’ve spent most of this year alone. It’s strange to be around so many people at once. But it’s been nice.” I gave him a reassuring smile in return. 

“Why have you been alone?” He questioned. He took a clean plate from my hands and began using one of Bilbo’s decorative towels to pat it dry. 

“It was a choice.” 

He stared at me curiously. 

“It’s a long story.” I continued. 

His expression turned back into a grin. 

“Longer than the ones you’ve already told me?”

I nodded. 

“Well, lucky for us we have a long journey ahead.” He reached for another dish. “We’ll have lots to talk about.” 

As I handed him another plate his hand brushed against mine. I felt his fingers linger for a moment, and I looked over to find his gaze locked on me. He was watching me intently. The intensity of his stare felt as though he were looking through me, looking for the real Lilith underneath the hardened exterior I liked to portray. I felt myself locked in as well, studying his features as we stood less than a foot apart. His eyes wandered from my eyes down over the rest of my face, and I felt myself snap back to reality. As much as I’d enjoyed his company so far, I wouldn’t be in Middle Earth forever. I had come for a reason, and I couldn’t allow myself to get sidetracked. No matter how tempting it was. I looked away quickly and turned my attention back to the bowl in my hands.

“So, you’re 77 huh?” I asked, changing the subject.

I saw his playful smile return out of the corner of my eye. He gathered an armful of clean dishes and turned away from me, moving over to the hutch in the corner that stored Bilbo’s finest China.

“I am. How about you?” He questioned in return.

“Thirty two.” I answered.

“Human?”

“More or less.” I teased, glancing over my shoulder to watch his expression.

His eyes widened.

“Is that included in one of these long stories?” 

“Yes.” 

“Well I quite look forward to hearing it.” 

“Kili, catch!” 

We both turned around just in time to see Fili sling a plate down the hallway. Kili caught it with ease, clearly having done this with his brother before, and effortlessly tossed it to me. I caught it delicately, aware of Bilbo’s watchful eye, and stacked it in the sink. As they juggled dishes between themselves and continued tossing them to me I heard the dwarves begin to sing. 

“Blunt the knives, bend the forks…” 

Dishes continued flying through the doorway, bouncing from Fili’s to Kili’s skilled hands and then into mine. I kept one eye on the nervous hobbit in the corner of the room, offering a sympathetic smile, and the other focused on catching each item that came sailing through the air.

“THAT’S WHAT BILBO BAGGINS HATES!”

The song came to an end as the final dish glided into my hands, and I heard the dwarves erupt into laughter from the dining room. I shook my head, laughing as well as I began rinsing off the remaining plates and cutlery. 

“Is this how a dwarf event usually goes?” I asked Kili as he came back to stand beside me at the sink. 

“More or less-”

He was interrupted by a sudden knock at the door. I heard silence fall as the dwarves' laughter came to an abrupt halt, and Kili’s face suddenly shifted. 

“He’s here.”

Transformers: More Than Meets The Eye Issue By Issue: Issue #1: How To Say Goodbye and Really Mean It (Patreon Review for Brotoman.exe)

Hello all you happy Autobots. I hope you've packed your ready for a long and lengthy quest as today I undertake one of the longest planned projects i've ever done, courtsey of my newest proud patron, @brotoman-exe. It's the first time in a LONG time i've had a new 5 dollar patron and he seems to be in for the long haul as he's requested monthly reviews of a series that spans over 50 issues and goes into a second volume. And that's not getting into if we cover the dark cybertron crossover, the tie in issue for revolution, or the annuals. But it's one i'm more than happy to do for as long as possible and covers a series near and dear to my heart.

Transformers More Than Meets The Eye is one of my faviorite comics again and the work that got me back into transformers. It's a wonderful epic that is in my faviorite genre of storytelling: A ragtag bunch of misfits who often have no buisness doing what their doing let alone being a group becoming a found family of sorts while proving there more than what both those around them and they themselves think. It's also loaded with humor, character, and giant robots, so what's not to love.

It's also a chance to correct a past mistake. See this isn't my first attempt to do a retrospective of this comic. Back in pride 2021, I did a review of the first three issues of this series, as the series is both one I badly wanted to cover and one that is warmly and greatly represntive, using the fact 90% of all transformers are male to be gay as heck. And I did.. but a combination of an overtaxed schedule, a shaky mental state, and said schedule being flip turned upside down lead to me constantly delaying part 2 before scrapping it entirely and planning to cover the series later. So when Brotoman asked me to cover it monthly, I had only one response

So this is the first project i'm doing over again, and hopefully not the last as I intend to revisit New X-Men at some point, and hopefully this time i'll finish what i've started, however many years it takes. So let's get ready to blast off into space as we meet the crew of the lost light again for the first time. Before we get into the series proper we need to cover what lead us here.

Transformers At IDW

For those less familiar with comics, IDW is a third party comics company that mostly focuses on liscened comics, with highlights being reprinting a bunch of european Duck and Mouse Comics, being the current home of Sonic the Hedgehog, and biggest of all, being the primary home of Hasbros properties: Dungeons and Dragons, My Little Pony, GI Joe and many many more (Including everyone's faviorite Space Knight Rom) got comics here and naturally Transformers was one of the first. And to really get this right, they decided to launch a whole new continuity under transformers legend Simon Furman, who took over for the marvel comic and has written tons of transformers since.

And because I wanted to be throughly prepared for the first time I attempted reviewing this run and to know where things had been I read all of Furman's run and the runs after it to have a good sense of history. Here's an archival photo of me after that experince

Yeah I'm not one to take the side door so i'll come right up front and knock: most of the comics in this continuity before More Than Meets The Eye are mediocre at best and downright awful to sit through at worst. While i'm glad I read them all to have proper context for these reviews, i'm also glad I NEVER have to touch these things again.

Starting with Furman's run which took the idea of "robots in disguise" dead seriously. And some of the ideas are good: having the autobots actualyl use their disgusiese more, a shadowy third party in the war that runs out of a company. They even cleverly redo the headmasters, an old toy gimmick that had aliens pilot transformers, by having them be knockoff transformers needing a pilot to work. There were really solid ideas and reworks of various gimmicky toylines. There's also a variety of good one off stories in the one shots, as furman used Spotlight issues (literally called that) to shed a light on other things going on and expand the story past the main minis.

The problem is that while there were good specks of story here and there, in paticular the series made me a fan of blaster, six shot and has an excellent version of hot rod, if not as good as what more than meets the eye would later do but we'll get tot that, the main story is REALLY boring and dry. The characters don't really have a lot of personality , even my boy starscream, the story moves at a very slugish pace and there's just no levity. I'm not expecting it to be joke o clock but I need more to really keep me going. Ther'es just not a lot here to latch onto or really care about. The ideas are there but the end result wore me out by the end.

Sadly things didn't improve all that much with the next era, All Hail Megatron, a 16 issue maxiseries by Shane Mcarthy that was IDW's first attempt at a soft reboot of this continuity. It would be FAR from the last. I went into this one hopeful despite it having a mixed reception, as the premise is badass and one any transformers fan can get behind: After the autobots decided to leave earth unguarded to deal with another crisis at the end of the last series

Megatron takes the opportunity to conquer earth, and uses a reluctant traitor in the autobots to stage attacks on every other autobot garrison in the galaxy, stranding our heroes and having him have won. Or in simplist most bonechilling turns, Megatron WINS.

So once again we have a good concept: Megatron won, our heroes are left trying to find SOME WAY to turn the tide, and earth is left at his mercy. It should be a no brainer.

The first issue was executive meddling: Apparently Hasbro didn't want McCarthy to show too much of the actual destruction and nightmare that would enuse from their takeover.

So shockingly, numbing the sheer terror and nightmare that ensues when a bunch of technicolor evil robots get to run rampant on the world without anyone to stop them , made the story fall flat. We see some of what they do but without any real damage or stakes it just dosen't have weight.

The next issue is the humans. Most aren't focused on enough with only one, Andy Reid, is really getting what the book should have focused on: normal people stuck in the crossfire when evil wins. It's not a bad concept but with the fangs removed we only get to see it from two perspectives. And one of them.. is Spike Witwicky

Spike is every action hero cliche poured into an action figure mold for an off brand gi joe that somehow became a real boy. Spike is a swaggering dipshit who thinks he's the greatest and the narrative agrees because Spike has snipers trained on it's family and if he dosen't call them every four hours they fire. Having one resourceful hero against the decpticons isn't a bad idea but having this guy be at the front yeesh. And somehow he only gets WORSE with each series.

The other problem is our heroes, spend most of their desperate situation... bickering with one another. I get why: one of them betrayed the others, hope is low, and optimus may be dead. It isn't till Hot Rod shows up with his gaggle of intresting autobots that the story gets some life. I don't mind the autobots having to make their way back or be out of the main action on earth, that's kind of the point. I don't mind it being grim. What I do mind is it taking so long for a lot to happen, and for things to really kick into gear. I'm suprised just how tiresome robots bickering gets but here we are.

Not only that the decpticons themselves are just kinda there.. there's a good idea of Megatron pondering what he does now he's actually won, but it goes nowhere. And that's really the series in a nutshell: it has some great ideas it ocasionally captalizes on but ultimately goes nowhere.

The one bright spot is a tie in mini centered around a character introduced in this series. A character a lot of people really diddn't like at the time: Drift. And I see why: In All Hail Megatron he gets a lot of focus. Problem is Drift is an entirely NEW character Hasbro apparently crammed down fans throats. As usual the homer simpson approach to promoting a character failed.

His mini though was one of those bright spots I mentioned; A decently intresting tail about a city that keeps itself out of the war that finds itself hope to one of the worst of the decepticon army and how it changes the future Drift into a better person. There is a decent amount of standard "we can't interfere because we're self righteous morons who will inevietibly be punished for our hubris" stuff, but Drift himself is engaging and the story does challenge that sort of viewpoint. Also said city and society will be important later as Drift is a main characte rin MTMTE , which helped smooth out the edges and made him into a fan faviorite.

So we're onto phase 3, the ongoing book Transformers by Mike Costa. Mike Costa is a good writer otherwise, what i've read of his x-men run being a fun paced action thrill ride. But this book?

Out of the three main phases before the big relaunch here, this is the one people seem to hate most. And it. Is. JUSTIFIED. The premise is the autobots are on earth, trying to repair the damage done but being hated by the US Goverment and seen as no better than the decpticons. Optimus decides he has to go fuck off to space because that worked out so well last time, and leaves it with bumblebee, which leads to shoddy leadership, conflicts with paper thin analogues for foreign countries, and a lot of humans being stupid and not getting that as incompitent as they are the autobots are the good guy and Hot Rod being an impulsive idiot and trusting a guy literally named Swindle because the constructicons came off as the better option compared to the autobots.

It's a murky mess of plotlines and bad decisions that i've mostly blocked out for my own sanity and won't spend forever recapping here. Ya'll REALLY don't deserve that headache.

Once again a mini series was the ray of light here. Last Stand of the Wreckers. Roberts contributed to the story while the writing and art for it were by Nick Roche, a great artist who contributed to the first arc of MTMTE before the stress of doing a monthly got to him. It's a wonderfully gritty tale that succeeds where the other attempts at being darker failed, following the rough and tumble Wreckers, essentailly the X-Force of the Autbots, as they go on a suicide mission to a prison that's been taken over by the Decepticons, lead among them Overlord, a new character and a throughly terrifying villian that keeps slauthering people and doing terrible things so daddy megatron will notice him at last. It's tense, sad and throughly great nad worth checking out. And like Drift and the Circle of Light, Overlord will also be important later. Last Stand is what helped James put his foot in the door.

What solidified things though was Chaos Theory. I plan to cover this series indepedently when we get to the shadowplay arc, as it's sort of a prequel to that and lays the groundwork for the various trips to past cybertron the series takes. It takes place before the war as tensions bubble and a future member of the MTEMTE cast tries to murder megatron in his cell. It's great, and has a great moment with Megatron admitting his villiany that will be mentioned later in MTMTE.

So shortly after that Chaos happened, a messy finale. To make a long story short, Galvatron, who in this continuity is not the same as megatron, raised an army of zombies called sweeps to raze cybertrona nd later merged with something to become an outer god. Megatron one upped him, things sure did happen, and Roberts helped write the script. The important things are that Cyclonus, Galvatron's old buddy who aided him till he realized he be crazy, turned against his friend nad saved Hot Rod's life, Cybertron was radically transformed into a primal state, and Megatron was defeated.

As a result we get what would kick off the next era of IDW Transformers, an attempt to right the ship by doing something radically diffrent: The war the Autobots waged against the evil forces of the Decpticons.. was over. The Decipticons surrendered. The question was.. what now? What do you do next when you've spent CENTURIES fighting a war? Oceans rise, empires fall but it's much harder when it's on your call.

So that's where this era kicked off with the Death of Optimus Prime. I opted to jump into the series instead of this as while not a terrible start at all, it's where I came in as this issue is in the first MTMTE trade, it's more of a pilot for the sister series Robots in Disguise. See instead of having a mini series or just one ongoing, this era had two with the split coming in said one shot.

Death of Optimus Prime follows the title character as he finds despite the war being over.. things aren't great. Like at all> The New Reborn Cybertron is having a temper tantrum and causing earthquakes, disasters and what not with most of it REALLY not being safe and only Iacon, which somehow surivived everything, standing. Not only that most of the cybertronians who opted out of the war or abandoned it have returned.. and blame the autobots for everything that happened. The NAILS, as their dresrively called should have a point, that they didn't want any part of this war. It is perfectly valid to object to a war especailly when it's senseless. In this case thoguh it's sorta like objecting to the allies during world war II: Megatron was not going to stop until he had won and would kill anything non cybertronian.

With Optimus unable to repair things due to the matrix of leadership having split right in half like a kit kat bar, our heroes end up divided on the issue after a map is found inside, leading to the mythical Knights of Cybertron, a group that allegedlys founded a Cyber Utopia: Bumblebee wants to stay on Cybertron and try to set up a goverment despite not being wanted. Hot Rod wants to fuck off into space to go find the knights, hoping they have a way to heal the planet, as well as a way to honor their culture instead of buldozing it. Optimus.. gives them both halves like a parent who just wants his kids to stop fighting and plans to leave, doing so to settle things down since he's the face of war and taking his old name of Orion Pax back.

So the series split into two: Robots in Disguise follows Bumlbee as he tries to make a go of things nad fails as the NAILS won't shut up and Starscream spins circles around him, playing the NAILS well while being awesome because well. he's starscream. He also gets a crown eventually which is wonderful. As you can tell i'm not a big fan of RiD,. RiD is a lot of arguging, people being stupid, and the sympathetic characters being sidelined. It's also a LOT of Prowl who we'll get into in a moment but for now is best summed up as

It gets better in Season 2, with Optimus joining the cast, along with Cosmos a friendly UFO and Sky Linx, whose a giant space dragon thing that's also a space shuttle, as well as Thundercracker and his kitty. But like so many before it's good ideas, bad execution and overall no matter how many times I tried I just couldn't get into John Barbers run. A third mainline book, Windblade (Which later became Till All Are One), was MUCH better and I truly recommend it, with it's writer not only helping fix the verses shaky reputation with women robots (Arcee became one after being born a male transformer via horrifying experiments and became angsty as a result> I shodulnlt' ahve to explain to you why this is bad but someone shoudl've to Simon Furman, who then got into a fight with Windblade's writer over it despite her being objectively right> Their cool now but still.. jesus man) , having fun intrigue and of course my boy starscream in a tiny crown.

So yeah as you can see the IDWverse was a bit shaky, but it had it's bright spots and it's sad it's coming to an end, with it's second reboot having ended after also failing fairly hard and Image now having the rights via it's Skybound imprint. But for all ti's faults, it gave us some bright lights.. and no light was brighter, better, or weirder than the lost one. So with all this exposition handled.. we can finally set off

The Issue Finally

I may comment on the covers on and off, we'll see, and i'll be sticking mainly to the main covers, as there's just so many dang variants and this review is long enough as is, I can't imagine what the others, even withotu the idw exposition, weill be like. This cover is near and dear to my heart, and i'm fully biased on that as it's an homage to one of my faviorite covers of all time that kicked off one of my faviorite runs of all time.

Given the runs are both semi-sitcom (if less so in MTMTE's case) takes on classic properties, it fits like a glove and it won't be the last time we get an homage to this cover as we get two more echoing it: One for season 2 and one.. that I won't spoil because it's a MASSIVE spoiler for the final arc of season 2.

The issue opens with Rodimus giving one hell of a speech to the people of cybertron. It's one of my faviorite scenes in the entire run, and for good reason setting the tone of wonder and exploration that goes in hand with the heart, hyjinks and tragedy of this run.

While he's obviously selling a big epic quest with tons of stakes, what he says there.. and what he says after really underlines the true meaning of the quest

"You Deserve To See The Universe Without A Gun in your hand"

It's a chance for once to enjoy the universe. Even if there's a big, booming underlying goal to everything Rodimus is doing, both the one he says, and the one for his own drive and ego we'll get to shortly, the real appeal to most of these bots watching.. is a chance to start over. No wars waged to destroy the evil war of the decpticons. Just a noble goal, a chance to see the universe, and all the time in the world to do it. It appeals to one of the purest and most loved aspects of sci-fi, what made Star Trek so beloved and what's made works since, from Star Trek's own newest series Brave New Worlds to spirtual spinoff the Orville: The love of exploration, of going out into the world and finding yourself or something new. The wonder of this kind of thing. The fun of setting off into the world and seeing what happens. MTMTE mixes Star Trek's wonder and scope with a bit of Firefly's taking a bunch of scraps from a war and seeing what they do next, and is helpfully not created by a guy who sucks dirty ass in thunderstorms, so that's nice.

Speaking of sucks dirty ass in thunderstorms, watching this along with cybertron is Prowl

Prowl is an overly paranoid, overly fascist police officer who feels the war isn't ended. He also sucks and I hate him. He's with Wheeljack who dosen't suck and in fact has a realy cool helmety face i've always loved. Wheeljack predicts a max exodus as let's face it, who dosen't want to fly up into space in a giant ship and explore the stars. Prowl however thinks it'll be a non event and that his calculations show barely anyone leaving

Yup as usual Prowl is wrong about people, what's going on in the world and the general concept of things, and the next day, the day most of the issue takes place, a GIANT crowd is lined up to board the lost light. IT's almost as if the guy who thinks the war still isn't over can't grasp that people no longer want to fight it and just want to get on with their lives.

We'll resume the "Prowl Sucks and I Hates Him" hour in a moment as we transfer from one of the worst versions of a G1 Autobot to one of the best, as Ratchet is overseeing a NAIL protester who transformed himself to death. While i'll have to admit I hadn't seen really ANY of G1 going into this comic, or into this retrospective , Ratchet already had a place in my heart thanks to transformers animated and the fact he's about the same here, a crotchety old legend who ends up with a bunch of younger less prestigious weirdos for his own reasons, was a big up.

Ratchet admits he could've saved the guy had his hands not been shaky. We also get one of the best terms in all of transfomers

It really highlights roberts approach to the franchise: unlike other works in this verse, Roberts isn't afraid to embrace how silly things are. He got away not only with naming something rigormorphis.. but having the dead body transform wtih the old cartoon sound effects. Yet at the same time it underlines how he treats things: he's not afraid to fully embrace the silliness of the franchise or crack jokes, it's what keeps this work so great.. but he also does everything with a purpose. Rigor Morphis, while darkly hilarious.. is also a geninely intresting concept that fits perfectly with the world. Roberts is dedicated to geninely building up how Cybertronians function, their culture and their unverse and taking it seriously enough to still work, but with enough good humor and sense that this is a franchise built upon selling toys, comics, tv shows and other merchandise to not take himself TOO seriously. It's an approach I hope future shows including the upcoming at the time of this review Earthspark take to heart.

Naturally given he has focus, Ratchet is joining the ship which bumblebee takes with all the grace and civlity of a 12 year old. LEADER OF ALL OF CYBERTRON FOLKS. He needs him here, but Ratchet makes a valid argument why he wants to leave: he's served every prime since Nominus and thus has been at this for a LONG time, and knows his number will be up eventually. Since Rodimus has promised to pick up any strays they find on the way who were lost since not EVERYONE from the war has been found just yet, Ratchet sees it as the perfect opportunity to find and train a replacement, his swan song. It again underlines a common theme with the Lost Lighters and this work as a whole: It's not the journey it's the destination. As we'll see most people join not for the knights of cybertron quest, but simply to find something else. For Ratchet it's a chance to pass his legacy on and make sure his knowledge and skills live on long after what time he has left is gone.

We next meet Cyclonous, who as I said was part of the whole Galvatron mess. He's an ancient warrior, a bot out of time who awoke to find a cybertron he didn't like and that now it's only gotten worse with the primal reversion, the gleaming cities he remembers from Cybertron's golden age now replaced with a nightmarish landscape. Why he's leaving is obvious: On a Cybertron that throws him in with the Decepticons depsite not really being one and that is unrecognizable, what reason has he to stay? He finds signs of life in a cave though that seem familiar and heads to check them out.

We next get more prowl

And this is where he REALLY shows his ass.. or whatever transfomers have that serves as an ass. Point is he's dressing down his old partner in both senses of the word Chromedome for leaving.

Yeah as we'll find out a few issues from now said "talent" is mnemosurgery: Chromedome can break into a bots mind for information, which was used as an interregation tool both pre-war as a cop and during the war as Spec Ops. It's also a talent Chromedome BLATANTLY dosen't want to use again.

He's had to do TERRIBLE things for the war and like most soldiers, especially those suffering from Trauma which Domey canocially does, he's carried enough of the war with him. He's earned a right to live his life without having to keep doing the things that haunt him. This is all recorded by Chromedome's current Conjux Endura, Rewind whose pointedly Prowl's oppisite: he geninely supports Chromedome wanting to get away from what he used to be and heal into what he CAN be, he's a non combatant having as we lean a memory stick for an alt mode, and he's calm and gentle to Prowl raving like a paranoid luantic.. which dosen't remotely let up after

Yeah the table flipping apparently became so memetic it got turned into a running gag as well as canocially just something he does a lot. Bless you James

So as he radios some agents on board the LL to load some cargo, which shockingly is not remotely a good thing and we'll get to much later in the series what that cargo actually is, we can get into why I hate Prowl so much.

Prowl is a narcist,and a facist, the latter terms can be thrown around haphazzardly, so I am treading carefully.. but it applies and is fully necessary here. Prowl dosne't care for anyone else on an emotoinal level, only what they can do for him, only seems to think he's right even undermining OPTIMUS FUCKING PRIME later in the verse, and being blatnatly descrimtory to the nails and decipticoons. I'm not saying either group has issues: The Deciptcons were the bad guys and while some geninely want to reform or not be mistreated, many are just as bad as ever, and the NAILS, while having some valid points, have a majority of them screeching said points. Prowl cares for nothing and nobody except his own warped version of right and wrong that involves tourture, no real cybertronian rights, and Prowl being judge jury and executioner. He's everything wrong with policing wrapped into one character. He dosen't want the war to end because of one sad simple truth: he's obsolete without it. He's the kind of soldier, the kind of cop, the kind of person who fights not because it's the right thing to do, not because there's no better option, not like any of his commrades.. but because he ENJOYS it. He enjoys killing, tourtruing and doing this and framing it all as the greater good when really it's just him wanting to be the hero because without the trappings of war, he's just a bully who refuses to move on like everyone else is trying to do. It dosen't help that as far as I can tell he SURIVIVES the entire run of this universe.

I just.. needed to get my rage out NOW so I can move on and focus on the characters I actually like. Speaking of which next we meet Tailgate, a tiny transformer whose suffering from a bad case of no legs, having fallen down the hole six million years ago and preparing to blow some shit up to escape.

We next meet Whirl. Whirl is someone with severe issues, both with impulse controls and mentlaly a former wrecker fired for reasons that'll be revealed dramatically later who is tryign to talk out his issues.. to a pile of dead sweeps, clones of Scourge, another friend of Cyclonuses.. and why he comes in. Naturally Whirl's first instinct on being found in a room full of sorta corpses is to try and murder the witness.

We then get a bunch of intros, starting with Red Alert, the ships mildly paranoid and gruff head of security who in turn lets three new additions to our main cast onto the ship: First up is Brainstorm, a mad scientests mad scientest who has a neat look and a briefcase that for some reason Rodimus is letting him just take on board without remotely checking which can't posisbly backfire

That Chekov's gun got a WHILE before it fires off though so onto our next crewmember: Swerve!

Swerve is a small, mouthy little autobot who can't seem to shut up. So naturally he's one of my faviorites as just how long this review is this far in should tell you I also cannot shut up. So I relate to him, and parts of his character that come up later, heavily.

Next we have Rung, a brand new character.. though it can be hard to tell. As you can probably see at this point, while James isn't immune to using more prominent autobots (Hot Rod, Ultra Magnus, Ratchet, Cyclonus), he's also fond of taking characters who mostly existed just to sell more toys and really fleshing them out. IT's why many of these characters got new toys and Swerve and Tailgate in paticular were part of Walmart's g1 risues.. still haven't been able to get my hands on those or any of the lost light crew aside from Megatron. And yes Megatron joins the crew in season 2. We'll get to that in a year or so, but yes that actually happens. And it is as awesome as it sounds.

But Rung is brand new, a psyctrist whose alt mode is unknown. That as you've probably guessed by now is also a plot point. He collects models of ships and is an intresting addition that shows Optimus' compassion: While rung was a psychatrist pre-war too, as we'll see in a flashback arc later, the fact Optimus brought one in despite having no combat value shows why he's well Optimus. At least for now> This is pre his "I'm going to conquer earth for the greater good!' phase> Which also happened and isn't as awesome as it sounds. Rung ends up getting knocked over by Cyclonus and Whirl.

Before we get to them though we check back with our main trio. And it's here i'd like to get into how I found this book. See I get most of my comics digtially and through Comixology, a spinoff of amazon that has large amounts of comics digtially at lower prices than retail and that's before we get into the sheer amount of sales. It's more cost effective for me than print so i've been using it for some time now. And if that weren't enough they have a netflix-style subscripton service, comixlolgy unlimited which for 6 bucks a month gives you an ungodly amount of access to tons upon tons of comics. If you want to check out idw's transformers before the lsiecne dries up, this is the best way as pretty much everything from it is on there by now

So when they added the first seasons of RiD and MTMTE I was curious, not only because LIndsay Ellis had mentioned this continuity had gay robots but because both sounded intresting. It was simply a matter of which to read first.. and RiD won for fairly simplye and rediculous reasons: I've always deeply liked hot rod and a comic seemingly starring him seemed great. The fact it ended up ticking a LOT of storyteling boxes I like was icing on an already great cake

As for why the first is the dumbest: he looks dope. I still want SOME non-bay version of him on my shelf. The less dumb reason is that after watching the bay movie as a teen and enjoying it, I hopped on my computer when I got home and desperate for more cool robots, found transformers the movie. It remains one of my favoirite pieces of the franchise and a film I intend to cover at some point as I fucking love it. Keep in mind I went in blind so I didn't know the various dead bodies were actual characters, nor that a lot of the new cast came out of nowhere, but even knowing that now I still have an attachment to the season 3 cast. Not season 3 itself as I haven't watched it and i'm clearly better off that way from what i've seen via Phelous, but thed characters had great design, were fun to watch, and were part of a film I loved> The film's also why I love Grimlock so damn much, as should we all. I have one but I want more because you can neve rhave enough talking robot dinosaurs. Same with STARSCREAM, who I do need a figure of, who is glorious as always.

So having an attachment ot Hot Rod and Ultra Mags, not so much Cyclonus but this comic made me love him so hey, it was an easy sell. And i'm glad I did as this is easily the best version of him i've encountered: James took a character that was hot headed and impulsive and had made some stupid decisions, and decided to lean into it. As such Rodimus is impulsive, egotistical, and when we see it is bragging about hwo many crew he's got like a ten year old who just got a cooler transformer than his most hated friend. He's also endearing: it's clear this quest means a lot to him, he cares about his crew and while he may be an ipulsive hammy manchild, he's a cool one. He's basically james t kirk if he were less horny and more hopped on skittles.

With him are two contrasts: Drift whose been made into a new agey samurai who constantly tries to stay peppy and Ultra Magnus, who in this continuity is a giant stickler to the rules who vies wearing your autobadge at an angle as a high crime, isn't fond of his new crew, and is the defention of hardass. The two ballance him out with Drift being the encouragment Rodimus needs and a reminder of the spirftual part of the journey and Ultra Magnus being the hard nosed voice of reason our hero needs.. while also having such a stick up his whatever a transformer has that substitues for an ass that he's a comedic foil. Rodders and Mags are bascially Jake Peralta and Captain Holt without the father son angle, with drift just kinda there, but still not half bad.

So back at the fight Cyclonus shows his character as he dosen't WANT to do this, Swerve is just trying to you know murder him. Meanwhlie Tailgate has been passing out on nad off for the last 6 millon years and prepares to finally ignite the energon.

As if this wasn't enough, the unambgiously gay duo and Ratchet are heading for the ship, with the happy couple bickering a tad as Chromedome tends to bring up the fact his boyfriends alt mode isn't a vehicle. Thei rinterrupted by the fight, with Swerve having one and preparing to execute cyclonus and blaming him for his own issues.. btu Ratchet isn't remotely fooled, figuring Cyclonus might of done something but can't talk Swerve down. Thakfully a giant energon explosion can and our heros decide to load the two on the ship and let Rodimus sort it out, along with Tailgate who shows up talking about a ship and assuming it's their ship bring him along for repairs. Rewind plans to catch up.. after buying some mysterious but clearly shady discs from Swindle.

Thus we come to our ending. Rodimus prepares to take off and refuses to take a call from Bumblebee and we get some great comedic timing

Shockingly Prowl ISN'T to blame but we'll get to that next issue. The important thing is that cybertron thinks everyone is dead for now.. and blames Prowl because I would too if I didnt know they sere still alive. Hell if I didn't know why the engine malfunctoned i'd still think it was an ATTEMPT to kill them

But it isn't, they simply jumped with their quantum engines (their verision of lightspeed) too soon, so as a result they got shot halfway around the galaxy , the ships damaged and many of the crew go flying out it onto a planet, with Rodimus planning to retrive them. We end the main story on rodimus getting some.. less than stellar news when he sees what he thinks is a meteor shower

The issue itself ends on a message from the future... with a bunch of foreshadowing of what's to come...

Where this is from.. well that's for season 2 to settle as is everything else, but it's amazing just how far in advanced Roberts had this planned out as where it comes from was always intended. As for where.. you'll just have to stay on the ship won't you? One last bit of buisness before we depart though

A Most Precious Soundtrack

So one notable thing about the series is it has a soundtrack, with James Roberts, much like fellow comics mastermind Kireon Gilleon, picking out some tracks for each issue, with a few exceptions, as well as a theme song for each season. So having not listened along in the past as I tend to binge read a lot of the time, I thought it'd be fun to give these songs a listen and see what sticks out, what I think, how it fits the issue etc. I'll dot the character themes in with these early issues, but for now i'll just be focusing on the theme for the season and the two tracks for this issue. I'd also like to thank wadapan over at the transformers community wiki who saved this sountrack for us all , which is what I found via google. Let's begin.

Season 1 Theme/Series Theme: Lost Coastlines- Okkervil River 

An upbeat indie song about the band itself struggling to hold it together, using the metaphor about a two sailors going into unknown territory, which fits the comics themes of self doubt, exploration and strife as well as it's tone, upbeat yet full of angst, adventure and longing under the service. I'll likely have this one on repeat post review.

Across the Universe- Fiona Apple

This one I had sought out before for reasons that escape me now. The song itself is a fairly beautiful, very 90's cover. I still prefer the original and version from the movie Across the Universe (Another one for the massive pile of "Stuff I want to review at some point). It's not bad and at first I wasn't sure how much it fit.. but "nothings going to change my world" actually fits the story really well: Our heroes are setting out and get nothings going to change their world. A bit more literal than obviously intended, but still a nice little pun.

Fun fact, the image for this on youtube and likely other services is from the Plesantville soundtrack, a movie I do want to see at some point and sounds fairly good about two teens ending up in a black and white sitcom. But the cover is uh.. it's a lot folks.

Like I know a gimmick of the film is characters going into color but... why does someone set a tree on fire. Why are they making out in front of it. Are these characters even in the movie? I have all the questoins about plesantville, this soundtrack and its marketing team and none of the time to answer them.

Absent Friends- The Divine Comedy

Now this one fits way better. It fits the hustle and bustle, the idea these characters are leaving and may never come back (and with the issue ending explosion it's thought they won't). I really like the western tone of this, it's really neat and I may have to check this band out more. Cool stuff

So with that we're finally finished. This review was a lot and a lot of fun and next month we see who lived, who died and meet Swerve. So till next time thanks for reading, follow for more and consider joining my pateron yourselves. Later days!

sarah i have thought of another fic request or like a cute idea i guess! i didn’t have anyone in mind when i thought of it so you can write it for whoever you want honestly :)

okay so the reader is a streamer but streams games like animal crossing, standew valley, etc. then (insert who you’re writing for) says they don’t like that game, but later ends up buying it and the reader is like “i thought you said you didn’t like this game” and they’re like “well i like you” and they confuses their feelings and they end up playing the game together and reader gives them a tour of their island or farm

i feel like this request isn’t good, but the scenario seemed cute and i wanted to share it. sorry if this is confusing or just too specific cuz i know it can be hard to write requests like that! but yeah i hope it gives you inspiration and you like the request <3

new horizons

warnings: language, a Marvel reference (hint: natasha said it about tony), stupid idiots who don’t realize they like each other, use of pet names, Uno rage, Hasan Piker's presence

words: 1473

tags: sapnap x gn!reader

A/N: i’ve been trying to catch up a little on my requests (i’ve only got a couple so i’m not super overwhelmed) but school and outside life has been taking up most of my time so this one took me a while to make! tbh— ive never played animal crossing so i did google some of the game mechanics and i apologize if anything is inaccurate about the game…. but i liked relaxing and writing this cute one so thank you for requesting hails :3

requests/inbox status: open

-

“This game is trash.”

Your head quirks, fingers stopped on the screen. You’re in the process of giving your character a cute new nickname; it’s kind of hard to decide between “awkward dude” and “elderly skater”.

“Excuse me?” Your chat comes alive with emotes and ‘KEKW’s, obviously entertained by you and your almost-more-than-friends-friend.

There’s a story for that later.

Sapnap’s rough laugh comes through your headset and he audibly swallows, the sound of a water bottle dropping onto his desk echoing.

“I’m just saying—it’s boring. It’s like Minecraft but you don’t like… do anything.” The grainy image of his bearded face shifts and you see him pull out his phone.

“It’s— you can’t even compare it to Minecraft! It’s a completely different game system—you actually interact with other people live in the game.” You huff out a dramatic sigh, slumping in your chair with a pout. “Just because you go into this lucid state where all you know is ‘touch block, hit George’ doesn’t mean this game isn’t fun.” (He scoffs at your awful impression of his voice. Your viewers love it.)

“Jeez,” he mumbles, fumbling with the cap of his water bottle. “Touched a nerve there, bud.”

You roll your eyes, getting back to the village in the game.

“Don't ‘bud’ me.”

The call falls comfortably quiet, the sounds of him tapping obsessively on his phone and you clicking away filling the silence. A gentle bedroom-pop YouTube playlist remains in the background, prompting you to hum along and glance at the chat to see a flood of “check twitter” and “Y/N TWITTER!!”.

“What happened on Twitter?” You mumble, confused, and pull the website up on another monitor. Sapnap just makes a curious noise, swinging back and forth in a circle. “Oh my God,” you say to yourself, fingertips brushing your parted lips.

“What?”

“Hasan Piker just followed me and retweeted one of my not even remotely political old tweets. Like from a year ago.”

“That’s— wow. Congrats?” Sapnap’s voice cracks, and his ears flush pink the tiniest bit when you glance at his face on Discord.

“I’m gonna go on record and say that he could get it.” You shake your head in disbelief.

Sapnap falls uncharacteristically non-hyper-verbal, so you look past the frenzied chat and to his screen— wait. He muted and turned his camera off.

“Um,” you start, furiously typing question marks in your private chat. “Where’d you go?” You mute and turn screen share off for your stream, concerned that he might’ve fallen off his chair and broken his neck and needs you to call the ambulance.

The characteristic ding of a twitter notification sounds through your bedroom, and you look at your phone quickly.

“That’s where I went.”

Sapnap Tweeted: “all Y/U stans can choke on my dick”.

“Jesus, Sapnap,” you say, and rapidly refresh to read the replies. This tweet was deleted. “That’s so— that barely makes sense, bro. Why— literally what?”

His snicker floods your ears and you relax in your chair. Crisis: averted. “Don’t fucking— what’s wrong with you?”

“I thought it would be funny,” he offers, shrugging, and fiddles with the straw in his water bottle, smile fading. “And also Hasan pisses me off.”

“Why, ‘cause he wants a piece of this? Jealous?” You think back to your viewers, knowing they’re probably spamming question marks and coming to ludacris conclusions about both of your absences. No offense to them. You remember your stan days very vividly.

“I mean, kinda.” He rubs once at his nose, glancing at the camera (and what feels like you) before taking a sip from his water bottle.

“Wow.” You watch one strand of his hair fall from beneath his hat and brush against his full eyebrows. “I’m uh—I’ll get back to my stream. You coming? Or is it time for a Sapnap-snack?”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” He snorts and leans his chin onto the balance of his arm.

“That means you like to take a little snack break mid-stream and come back approximately nine hours later and you didn’t even eat.”

“You know what— fuck you.” He flicks the camera as you laugh at the look on his face.

The teasing mood is easily kept as you switch games from Animal Crossing to Uno, all the while slamming Sapnap with +4’s and skipping the newly-arrived BadBoyHalo at any chance you can get. It unironically pisses him off and he has to take a Sapnap-snack break midway through (only a fifteen minute break this time, during which you and Bad take a “What Kind of Bread Are You?” quiz). The rest of the night is filled with devious cackles (you), loud and sudden bangs that sound suspiciously like someone hitting their desk in anger (Sap) and the stupid barking of Rat, AKA Lucy (Bad). She’s cute but a menace to the sound quality of Bad’s microphone. You sign off stream around 2 a.m. with various forms of thanks and kisses blown to the camera. It’s been a refreshing night, actually; you’ve been busy organizing a partnership stream all week and all your friends have been busy filming or editing or what-not. Quackity had time for a little Roblox every couple of days, though. He’s got your back.

The next time you see Sapnap is after a two hour stream of him try-harding in Valorant and you finishing responding to an email from your partnership in the VC.

“Okay, I’m back.” You hear him shift in his chair and click a couple more times on his keyboard. You perk up in your chair, closing the email browser you’d been looking at.

“Do you want to play anything else? I’m down for anything.”

“Absolutely not Uno. You can go to hell for giving me 6 cards that one time,” he jabs. You scoff, crossing your arms and leaning back in your chair.

“Okay, the +4 was on me but it’s Bad who gave you the last two. That’s not my fault, sweetie.”

“Yeah, yeah,” he mumbles, trailing off as the clicking of his keyboard stops. “Hey, um—Guess what?”

Your heart beats loud in your ears at the tone of his voice. He sounds nervous; that’s never good.

“I’m scared to guess,” you try, playing with a little Minecraft dog figurine you have on your desk with fidgety fingers. “What?”

“I bought Animal Crossing.”

Silence. You stare at his discord icon blankly, trying to reroute the wires of your brain.

“Tell me you love it.”

“Well… I haven’t actually played it— but you said you liked it, so.”

“So,” you repeat him, ears warming but continuing on. “Is that what you tell all your friends when you buy something they like? That it's because of them?”

He seems to choose his next words carefully, pausing a beat to consider your questions.

“Well, I don’t have a crush on all of my friends.”

“You—what?�� You stutter, caught off guard and stumbling. What did he just say? “Don’t tell me you mean you have a crush on me.”

“I’m almost positive I just did.” His discord icon stares right back at you, taunting.

“You know, you’re very casual for someone who just admitted they like-like me.” Your cheeks flush pink and you have to press a hand to your chest to keep your breathing sounding stable.

“Yeah, I’m kind of cool like that,” he offers, a huff of a laugh punctuating his statement. The conversation moves into a lull that you can’t help but know is because of you. He must expect you to say something about it, right?

“You are very cool, Sapnap.” You tilt back in your chair, sucking in a breath to prepare yourself for your next words. “And—Isortakindofhaveacrushonyoutoo.”

He must understand you, for you can hear the grin in his voice when he asks “Really?”

“Y-yeah.” You feel like a preteen again, all shaky and giddy in front of the boy you just asked to a middle school dance.

“Um, alright. What do we do now?”

“I don’t know,” you answer genuinely and swing in a happy little circle in your chair. “We could play Animal Crossing.”

“I’m down.”

You swear you’ve never heard more beautiful words.

He keeps his camera off for most of the time you two play, too focused on creating his island and asking you questions about how to fish to turn it on. He silently flips it on when you help him decorate his lawn, needing to show you in real-time the decorations he has bought and where you think he should put them. He looks cute. I mean, of course he does. He always does.

You tell him goodbye late in the night, eyes saying a little more than just “see you tomorrow”.

You like him. He likes you.

It’s even better when you two have matching gardens.

-

A/N: anybody and everybody (especially my precious hailey) let me know what you think!! :]

My Works:

2am knock on my door

Posted: May 17, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Anger!Reader

Summary: After Tony's death, Cap's disappearance, and end of Thanos, everybody go on separate ways to continue their lives. You became alone. But one rainy night, you heard a knock on your door, only to find Bucky Barnes soaking wet outside your apartment. You soon realized that you're not the only person who feels that kind of sadness and loneliness. That makes the two of you.

Warning: None

His I Love You

Posted: May 17, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x reader

Summary: You and Bucky are in temporary LDR due to his mission and just by hearing those three magical words, you felt okay.

Warning: None

You Saved Me

Posted: May 18, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x reader

Summary: You kept him from being insane by loving him for who he was, who he is, and who will he be.

Warning: None

Costumes

Posted: May 18, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: You and the avengers are having a Halloween party, and someone came with a familiar costume, making your heart skip a beat.

Warning: None

As Long As We Both Shall Live

Sequel to "2am Knock On My Door"

Posted: May 19, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Reader

Summary: Bucky didn't like the idea of you avoiding him. So during the mini-reunion party, he confronted you.

Warning: None

Turning Point

Posted: May 19, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x BestFriend!Reader

Summary: You were out with your girl friends, Nat and Wanda, but when you got home, your boy best friend, Bucky, isn't so happy about you coming home late.

Warning: None

Good Morning, Husband

Posted: May 20, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: You woke up and see Bucky Barnes beside you, realizing that it's your first morning as husband and wife.

Warning: None

My Lady

Posted: May 20, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: It is Tony's birthday party and everyone's required to wear their best formal attire, and when you did, you caught the attention of James Buchanan Barnes.

Warning: None

He Won't Allow It

Posted: May 22, 2021

Characters: TFATWS!Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: Just when Zemo is about to use you as a pawn to your next plan for your mission in Prague, Bucky decided to remind him that he won't allow anyone to use you. An unexpected confession came after.

Warning: Swearing

Dreamcatcher

Posted: May 22, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: Bucky continues to have his nightmares night by night. You advised him to follow what his therapist told him to do — to have a friend. It turns out, you also needed one. Will the two of you take this chance to help each other?

Warning: None aside from swearing

You Left Something

Posted: May 23, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x ExAvenger!Reader

Summary: It has been a year since you left the life of being an Avenger. But after a year, someone showed up in your house, telling you that you left something when you left your old life. What could it be?

Warning: Swearing, mention of sex/one-night stand

You Matter

Posted: May 23, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Girlfriend!Reader

Summary: You and Bucky together with the other Avengers went to Florida for a mission. When your ex-suitor was also in the same area, your boyfriend, Bucky Barnes, is triggered by your ex's words. How can you make him feel better?

Warning: Jealousy, A little bit of smut, Swearing

I'll Come Home To You

Posted: May 24, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Reader

Summary: All the men avengers are compromised in a big mission that has to do with an organization trying to revive and continue HYDRA's works. Seeing your fiance, Bucky, leave months before your wedding makes you worried.

Warning: None

His Muse

Posted: May 25, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: Tony and Pepper are finally tying the knot. And your date for their wedding is none other than James Buchanan Barnes, your best friend.

Warning: None

Still His

Posted: May 25, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Reader, Winter Soldier x Reader

Summary: You lost him five years ago, but what happens when the new fist of HYDRA turns out to be the man you thought was a ghost already.

Warning: Swearing, Alternate Universe, Poorly Written

Lost & Found

Posted: May 26, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: Nearly three years ago, the Avengers lost in a battle for humanity. They lost because of Thanos. Half of the planet vanished in thin air and only God knows what happened to them. Surprisingly, you received a call from Nat telling you that Tony Stark is safely back in the compound with the help of Captain Marvel. But you get another surprise when Nat tells you that Bucky did not vanish three years ago, he was with Tony this whole time. 

Warning: None

No One, But You

Posted: May 26, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: You, Sam, and Bucky went to Prague for a mission that has something to do with what they call the Flash Smashers, but Bucky is not his usual "game on" mode and you found out why. He's still grieving over Steve's disappearance and for not being able to apologize to Tony.

Warning: Swearing

Onto It

Posted: May 27, 2021

Characters: TFATWS!Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Reader

Summary: Bucky and Sam are both in New York to finish their mission with the power broker, which turns out to be Sharon Carter. The latter is not just the villain in this story, but you once got jealous of her as well when she tried to seduce your man.

Warning: Swearing, Jealousy, Mention of Smut

Nice To Meet You

Posted: May 28, 2021

Characters: TFATWS!Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: The restaurant where Bucky always takes Yori to eat with him is where you actually work. You've been watching and staring at him for quite some time now but didn't have the courage to introduce yourself to him. But what happens when Yori asked Bucky to take you out?

Warning: None

No Goodbyes

Posted: May 29, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Reader, CivilWar!Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: You fought for team Captain America during the Civil War. You were one of the people who believed that Bucky Barnes can gain his redemption. Fighting alongside Bucky, the two of you did not have a hard time getting along and eventually fell for each other. But after the fight in the airport, he decided to freeze himself again until a solution for his condition comes.

Warning: None

Always Beside You

Posted: May 30, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: You and Bucky have been living together for a year now. Ever since you came into his life, he stopped having nightmares, not until Sam gave up the shield and the country have a new Captain America.

Warning: None

It's Her

Posted: May 31, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Reader

Summary: It was supposed to be a night of fun with the whole team, but your ex-boyfriend shows up and tries to ruin your night.

Warning: Swearing, AU, Mention of a little SMUT

Scarred & Bruised

Posted: June 1, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: Each time you find yourself falling in love, you'd tell them about your dark past, and they'll always end up leaving you. So you tried not to fall in love with anyone since then, and it has been years since you felt love in your life. But then you met Bucky, and it's not hard to fall in love with him so you ran away from him. After a year of hiding and running from the man you thought was just like anyone else, he found you, and no chance that he'll let you go again.

Warning: Swearing, Mention of rape, Violence

You Made Me Live Again

Posted: June 2, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Reader, Steve Rogers x Avenger!Reader

Summary: You used to date Steve Rogers, but you knew that he has always been in love with Peggy, so you two stopped dating. Two years later, you met Bucky and slowly fell for each other, but you two decided to keep your relationship a secret since both of you doesn't want to shock everyone, especially Steve, who happens to be Bucky's best friend. But until when can both of you hold back?

Warning: Open-ended, Sappy Ending

Midnight Talks

Posted: June 7,2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Reader

Summary: After Bucky and Sam's mission in Brooklyn, they came back to the compound and you noticed that something is not right with Bucky. One midnight, you can't sleep and found Bucky in the mini-bar in the compound and you finally found out why he's been acting differently.

Warning: fluff, a little smut, drinking

More than anything

Posted: June 8, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x BestFriend!Reader

Summary: You and Bucky have been best friends since high school. He always asked you for advice whenever he's dating someone, when you say no, he'd say no as well. But one night, you found each other in your room, having sex. Waking up the next day, he's gone. No text, no call, nothing.

Warning: mention of smut

Build a life together

Posted: June 9, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Girlfriend!Reader

Summary: You and Bucky joined Sam to help him restore their family boat. But a life-changing event took place. An event of a lifetime for you and Bucky.

Warning: none

Of all the things

Posted: June 10, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Stark!Reader

Summary: Even before the civil war took place, you sided with Captain America about his point of view of Bucky Barnes — that he could gain his redemption. Bucky has never shown you anything bad ever since you met him. The next thing you knew, he caught your heart too. You took their side up to the civil war, and you knew your brother, Tony, would be hurt by your decision.

After the civil war, Tony told you about the truth of the death of your parents, the Winter Soldier killed them. You were hurt too, for all along you knew they got into an accident but it turns out, they were murdered.

Seeing how devastated Tony is for feeling betrayed by Steve Rogers and feeling hurt upon learning what really happened to your parents, you decided to go back with him in New York, without even saying goodbye to Bucky, the man you secretly loved.

A year later, you & Tony received a call from Wakanda, you are needed in a war. But little did you know, you're about to cross paths again with the man you've always loved from afar and secretly.

Warning: none

Only yours forever

Posted: June 11, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Reader

Summary: You and the rest of the remaining avengers decided to team up with the Eternals, but seems like your boyfriend, Bucky Barnes, isn't a fan of Ikaris and the way he stares at you.

Warning: Jealousy, Fluff, Implied Smut

I'm home in your arms

Posted: June 14, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Girlfriend!Reader

Summary: Bucky always comes to visit you, but he asked you to come over to his place this time. Upon your arrival at his apartment, you found him sad and emotional.

Warning: Fluff

Definition of heaven

Posted: June 16, 2021

Characters: Boyfriend!Bucky Barnes x Girlfriend!Reader

Summary: You found out you were pregnant with Bucky's baby when the blip took place. You keep the baby and raised him by yourself and with the help of a few friends. You have always believed that Bucky will come back to you and your son, Gabriel. Five years later, the Avengers won, Bucky came home to you and Gabriel.

Warning: Fluff

Sergeant Barnes' last letter

Posted: June 18, 2021

Characters: InfinityWar!Bucky Barnes x Fiance!Reader

Summary: You woke up in your bed without Bucky by your side. The only thing you found on his trace is his letter for you, saying his temporary farewell as he leaves for Wakanda to fight with his pal, Steve against Thanos.

Warning: Fluff

Let me take care of you

Posted: June 21, 2021

Characters: TFATWS!Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Reader

Summary: Joining forces with John Walker is the last thing you, Sam, and Bucky want to consider, but after seeing the powerful force of the Flag Smashers, the three of you left with no other choice.

Warning: Jealousy, Swearing, Fluff

The Barnes & Rogers talk

Posted: June 23, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Girlfriend!Reader

Summary: Bucky can't stop talking about you to his best friend, Steve Rogers.

Warning: Fluff

Could we?

Posted: June 26, 2021

Characters: ExBF!Bucky Barnes x ExGF!Reader

Summary: A normal day turns out to be different when you bumped into your ex, Bucky Barnes.

Warning: Fluff

Get her

Posted: July 2, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Reader

Summary: When Bucky found out that you were taken by the subgroup of HYDRA called "The Atonement," he will do everything just to bring you back safely.

Warning: Fluff, Expect an open ending, Heartbreak

Convincing Mr. Barnes

Posted: July 5, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x GF!Reader

Summary: Instead of going out of town with you, you convinced Bucky to help Sam in restoring their family boat.

Warning: Fluff, A little bit of SMUT

Just stay

Posted: July 7, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Neighbor!Reader

Summary: Clogged sink, carrying heavy furniture, fixing your broken headboard - these are just some of the times you called your neighbor, Bucky, for help, and he'll be happy to help you without anything in exchange. Until you finally offered something he can't resist, your body.

Warning: Mention of SMUT (18+), Fluff, Bucky being rough and soft at the same time

A little too late

Posted: July 9, 2021

Characters: ExBF!Bucky Barnes x ExGF!Reader

Summary: Bucky broke up with you and left you when he thought you were cheating on him with Steve. He left without any God damn word, and you weren't able to tell him that you never cheated on him, not even a thought of it.

3 years later, Bucky received a letter from Steve, making Bucky feel guilty for what he did to you.

Warning: Angst, Mention of miscarriage, Expect a heartbreak

Love than lose

Posted: July 11, 2021

Characters: TFAWTS!Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: The day Bucky confessed to you that he likes you, you told him that you can't be with someone whose life is always in the line of death. So you two decided not to do anything. But when you saw him in the news regarding his mission to end Flag Smashers alongside the new Captain America, Sam, you rushed towards the scene to tell him that you regret your decision.

Warning: Fluff

Each other's home

Posted: July 14, 2021

Characters: Husband!Bucky Barnes x Wife!Reader

Summary: You just got home from your shopping and spa day with Wanda and Nat, and you found your loving husband cooking dinner for both of you. Just a normal sweet night with the love of your life.

Warning: Fluff

Always you

Posted: July 19, 2021

Characters: Bucky Barnes x GF!Reader

Summary: Thea team is out for a celebratory dinner, but it turns out your ex-boyfriend was also in the same restaurant. Your boyfriend, Bucky Barnes, can't help but feel a "little" jealous.

Warning: Fluff, Jealousy, Mention of SMUT

Morning star

Posted: July 23, 2021

Characters: TFATWS!Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Reader

Summary: When Zemo asked Bucky to play the role of the Winter Soldier once more for the mission in Madripoor, you can't help but feel anxious about it.

Warning: Fluff

Says who

Posted: July 29, 2021

Characters: TFAWTS!Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Reader

Summary: You think Bucky hates you because he is too professional when you two are working on a mission, he doesn't do small talks, and he doesn't talk to you about any other thing aside from the mission itself. So when you had enough of his professionalism, you decided to confront him.

Warning: Fluff

Cap's divulgence

Posted: July 31, 2021

Characters: Steve Rogers x GF!Reader

Summary: After six months of putting your relationship with Steve Rogers in much secrecy, the star-spangled man boyfriend of yours finally broke the news to everyone in a celebratory dinner.

Warning: Fluff

For a lifetime

Posted: August 2, 2021

Characters: Husband!Bucky Barnes x Wife!Reader // Groom!Bucky Barnes x Bride!Reader

Summary: You just got married to the man you love, and on the reception, you are asked to give a message to your husband.

Warning: Fluff

The only family he got

Posted: August 7, 2021

Characters: PostEndgame!Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Reader

Summary: Bucky is still haunted by sadness after his pal, Steve Rogers, decided to live the life he never had with Peggy. He's very afraid that he'll choose the family he only got left, you.

Warning: Fluff

Moral of the Story (Prologue)

Series Summary: From childhood friends, to highschool sweethearts, the two naive, young, and lovestruck teens decided the best way to keep a strong relationship during college would be to marry right out of highschool. No one batted an eye at the idea as everyone knew they were soulmates. However, college is a big step in a person’s life. You learn new things about yourself, you make new friends, find new hobbies… And maybe being newly weds and going to different colleges across the states wasn’t the best plan… After a falling out, and a tragic heartbreaking divorce, the two now hold grudges for how the other handled the whole thing in the past. Neither not really knowing both sides of the story. 10 years later, and they both get a call from the lawyers office that settled their divorce. Somehow the papers never went through and the divorce was never completed. So now, the exes, or should we say husband and wife, have to meet back up after all these years to settle their failed marriage once and for all. (This summary will be shorter in other chapters. I just needed to get the full concept out there;)

A/N (repeat): So the other day while I was doing my hair (quite the process), I was playing music and the song Moral of the Story by Ashe came on. Mind you, I’ve heard this song hundreds of times, but for some reason, this time I got a major story idea! Listening to the lyrics brought me to this new series. Of course, the lengthy summary above will give you an idea of what came to my brain, but I recommend you listen to the song still because it plays a big part in my thought process:) (Plus it’s a good song;) Enjoy and please do not hesitate to share your thoughts and comments with me! I love each and every single one<3

(I will release the first chapter at the beginning of next week! That way I can give myself some time to write more chapters before sharing it!)

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Y/N (Modern AU)

Word Count: 1200+

Prologue:

"Melody, have the papers for the Bee's Knees company come in yet?"

"Uh, no. But I can call them again and see if they faxed it or sent over a physical copy though," Melody answered from her desk, already typing away to find the company.

"Perfect. We have a meeting with a recycling plant next week and I want to get everything set before we go in with them," Y/N nodded, coming out from her office with a file in her hands. She turned to her assistant at the front desk who was about 20 emails deep and already finding the issue. "Hey, you're not coming in tomorrow, right?"

"Um, no, no. I am. I rescheduled that date," she answered bashfully as if she had been caught in the act of something.

"Melody..." Y/N drug out, hand on her hip.

"What? I- He understood. He said he was fine moving it to Saturday," the young woman shrugged, never looking back at her boss that was clearly sending her a motherly stare.

"You're already over your 40 hours this week, and you've rescheduled with him, what? 3 times now?" Y/N moved to the front of the desk so the young brunette had to make eye contact with her.

"Yes," she answered hesitantly.

"Is it just nerves or something else?" Y/N smirked.

"I'm not nervous... It's just been a while since I've had time for a date."

"Two things about what you just said in the past minute. One, clearly this guy likes you because he's rescheduled with you this many times and hasn't called it off yet. So if you're nervous about it not going well on his end, I think you're safe," Y/N pointed a finger at her.

"But-," Melody started.

"Second," Y/N cut off with a raised eyebrow. "I'm giving you time to go on a date and you're still not taking it. Work is no longer an excuse."

Melody stopped avoiding eye contact and looked up at the Y/H/C hair woman leaning on her reception desk.

"You've been talking with my mom again, haven't you?" she sighed.

"I promised I'd take care of you. So yes, I have. And though her reasoning for you dating is because she wants grandbabies, I just want you to have fun and live your life. You're 22. Don't waste your young years being scared."

"Ugh, fine. I'll text him now and see if he's still available for tonight," she groaned.

"Perfect!" Y/N grinned in victory as she started to walk back to her office. "I expect the details in the morning," she winked before she walked in.

"Oh, Y/N!" Melody stopped her. "A message came for you while you were in that last meeting."

"Who from?" Y/N quirked an eyebrow, moving back to the desk.

"Uh, I don't really know. Didn't sound familiar, but here's the name and number they said to call back from," she answered, handing her a note.

Y/N took the small paper and looked it over. Her face dropped and her eyes widened.

"You ok? Is it someone you know?" the young assistant asked, noticing what looked like horror on her face.

"Um, yeah. Yeah, an old acquaintance of mine," Y/N tried to quickly brush off. "Um, I'm going to take this. Can you hold any calls and if anyone comes to talk, tell them to just email me?"

"Oh, ok. Yeah, I'll take care of it," Melody nodded.

"Thank you."

Rushing back to her office and quickly shutting her door, she raced to her phone. She read the business name again, not sure if she was dreaming or if it was a hallucination.

Nope. Hammer Attorney was written in Melody's perfect penmanship on the paper with a number that held an area code from New York. A place she never thought she would hear from again and from a town she hadn't visited in almost 10 years._________________

"Buck, did you tell Fury about getting those new water therapy machines?" Steve shouted from his room.

"We're at home, Steve. Why are we talking about work?" Bucky groaned as he slouched on the couch. A beer in hand and a documentary with I Survived stories playing in front of him.

Steve came in from around the corner looking down at his phone in hand before moving his eye line to his roommate.

"Because I just got a call from the night crew saying that the last one that was working, finally went out tonight while they were running it for some test," Steve raised an eyebrow.

"Ugh, you would think that a facility run by a billionaire who literally makes his money on high-tech machines, wouldn't have to ask for those kinds of things," Bucky groaned, grabbing his own phone and going through emails. "Let me check to see if the email went through. He wasn't in office when I went to tell him."

As he was sorting through the hundreds of emails sent back and forth just this week alone, he found the reply message.

"Yeah, management confirmed it. They should be in by Saturday it looks like. Guess Stark was still working out the kinks to a new one and was waiting to send one our way until the last one died to get more time on his newest model."

Steve nodded before walking to the kitchen and typing Bucky's response to the other crew members.

"The man is always finding new ways to upgrade them before he can even send them to us."

Just as Bucky was about to throw his phone to the side again though, it started ringing. Looking at the caller ID, he didn't recognize the unknown number. It was from in-state but in his hometown area of Brooklyn. He pinched his eyebrows together confused at the call, but answered it anyway, thinking it must be someone from home.

"Hello?"

"Hello. Is this Mr. Barnes?" The other voice answered.

"Yes, this is him. Who's this?" he asked, sitting up a little and putting the beer on the end table.

"My name is Matthew Murdock. I work at Nelson and Murdock Law firm," he went on. Bucky shook his head not knowing what that was supposed to mean. "Well, you may actually know us previously as Hammer Attorney. We recently just took over their business after some fraud issues."

Bucky's heart stopped. He knew what that name meant.

"I hate to inform you, but we were going through some of their old files. Ones we were informed could be incomplete or done completely incorrectly due to little care in the actual cases, but more so in taking the money."

"Incomplete cases?" Bucky said softly. His brain was still trying to wrap around the conversation.

"Yes, unfortunately, it looks like a lot of cases having to deal with divorces that the past owners handled, were done strictly in order to launder money. They weren't actually certified, nor trained in handling divorce settlements."

Bucky froze. Eyes wide. Mouth agape.

He stuttered out a response when the man on the other line didn't continue.

"A-And talking about incomplete divorce settlements, you called because..." Bucky knew. He needed to hear it out loud because if he didn't, it wasn't true. It couldn't be.

"I'm so sorry Mr. Barnes, but it looks as though you and your wife, Y/N Y/L/N or sorry, Y/N Barnes, are actually not divorced."

(I will release the first chapter at the beginning of next week! That way I can give myself some time to write more chapters before sharing it!)

Moral of the Story Taglist:

@taylormobley @ximaginx @vicmc624

Marvel Tags:

@thejourneyneverendsx @death-unbecomes-you @heyiamthatbitch @lizzymacy555  @srrymydood @xa-dia @redhairedfeistynerd @morganclaire4 @connie326 @captain-asguard @mollygetssherlockcoffee @teenagedreams-bucky @shower-me-with-roses​ @pham-tastical 

My Lovelies forever:

@natura1phenomenon​ @lauravicente​ @kakakatey​ @traceyaudette​ @notyourtypicalrose​  @laneygthememequeen​ @awesome-badass-cafeteria-sauce​ @sandlee44​ @thorne93​ @thefaithfulwriter​ @essie1876​ @greyeyedsmile14​ @capsiclehan​  @xostephanie​ @averyrogers83​ @awesomenursingstudent​ @gh0stgurl​ @cs-please​ @carls1022​ @jjlevin​ @rainbowkisses31​ @carls1022​ @anise-d-castle6​ @deannotmoose​ @their-bibliophile​ @kitkatd7​ @willowbleedsonpaper​ @mariaenchanted​ @snffbeebee​ @couldabeenamermaid​ @rebekahdawkins​ @alyispunk​

Bucky Barnes Tags:

@chloe-skywalker​ @charmedbysarge​ @jbarness​ @bellamy-barnes​ @katiaw2​ @aikeia​

Accidently Married | Tom Hiddleston x OFC | Chapter 5 | You practically whipped it out and peed on her.

A/N:  Tom makes certain comments about an ex (who is unnamed).  It is a fictional girlfriend, take from it what you will.  Keep your hate to yourself.  

SERIES MASTERLIST HERE

Pairing: Tom Hiddleston x OFC (Molly Bishop)

Summary: Tom is stuck in a news cycle from hell; Molly is stuck in the dead end job of bartending with a pile of student and credit debt.  Tom has an idea to solve all their problems.  Get married, get the paparazzi off his back, divorce after a year and Tom pays off Molly’s debts.  Tom has everything figured out, that is until he sees Molly as more than a just a friend and so does someone else.  In this vying for affections who will win, the handsome Brit or the boy from Boston?

This Chapter: Molly and Tom face their first big industry event, a Marvel party.  Tom finds himself unprepared for how he feels about Molly.  Particularly how he feels about Molly being friendly with a certain Captain. 

Warnings: fake marriage, smut (vaginal sex), mentions of:  child abuse/neglect, foster care, substance abuse, cheating.

TAGLIST IS OPEN! PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF YOU WANT TO BE TAGGED!  THANK YOU FOR READING!

-

Molly made a quick recovery and things went back to the usual routine. For her. Tom found himself wearing his better workout clothes. The ones without the holes. And wearing cologne and shaving.

“Did you shave?” Molly asked one morning, running her hand over his chin.

“Yes.” 

“Shame, I kind of liked how you looked with the stubble.”

Tom’s smile faded, and he started shaving only once or twice a week from then on. 

-

“I need you to go shopping.” Tom mentioned one day on his way out. 

Molly didn’t glance up from her reading. “Just make a list and I’ll go to the grocery store today.”

“No.” Tom fidgeted. “There’s an event. A party.” He cleared his throat. “For Marvel.” Tom tugged at his hair.

Molly’s eyes bugged out. “This isn’t just some party, is it?”

“No. It’s a big deal. All the stars will be there. Kevin Feige and some other execs. Think you handle it?”

Molly smirked. “Piece of cake, I have been charming VIPs for years. What kind of look do you want? Sweet wife or damn that’s his wife?”

Tom pulled her close. “Somewhere in between. Have Emma help you. I have no idea where to buy women’s clothes.”

“Will do.” Molly kissed his cheek. “Have a good day.” She pressed her hand on his chest.

“You too.” He returned the kiss on the cheek and stepped out of the door. 

Molly grabbed her phone and dialed Emma.

“So where does someone go to get a cocktail dress in this town?”

-

Molly caught Tom digging in her wardrobe the morning before the event. 

“What are you doing in there?” Molly called out from the doorway. 

Tom jumped and hit his head on the door. “I… I… was… just looking to see… if…” he sputtered, searching for a story.

“If you could see my dress before tonight.” She waved a hand, gesturing Tom out of the room. “Out.”

“But I need to make sure we coordinate.” Tom whined. His fingers lingered on a garment bag.

“That’s my wedding dress.” she sighed. “If I give you a color, will you yield?”

“On my honor as a gentleman.” Tom smiled.

“Black. Now leave. Your sister is coming over in a few hours to do my hair.”

Tom wrinkled his nose. “How long does hair take?”

She patted his cheek. “Oh you sweet summer child.”

-

Tom did the best to ignore the giggles coming from Molly’s bathroom. He fiddled with his jacket and shirt sleeves. He selected a black tweed-like suit with a grey shirt and tie. They should coordinate, he thought. For photos. 

A loud burst of laughter came from the bathroom. Tom strolled over and knocked on the door. Emma popped her head out.

“She’s not ready yet.” 

“We need to leave in fifteen minutes.” Tom countered.

“Give me ten.” Emma shooed him away. “Now go away.”

Tom shoved his hands in pockets. “It’s my house, you know.” he muttered.

“Our house!” Molly piped up from behind the door.

Emma turned to her. “Don’t engage. It only encourages him to stick around.” Emma’s head snapped back to Tom. “Why are you still here?”

“I’m going! Ten minutes, Em!” 

 Tom paced the living room floor. Twelve minutes later, Emma stepped in and cleared her throat.

“I present your stunning wife.” 

Molly stepped into the room and Tom’s breath caught in his throat. This was unlike how he had ever seen her before. Her tiered ruffled black dress hit right above the knee. Cut low in the front and back, it was sexy but not scandalous. Her hair pulled back into a low chignon. 

“Yeah…” Tom breathed, staring at Molly, who fidgeted in place.

“Thanks.” She caught the time. “Shit! Tom, we need to get going. Thanks so much, Em.”

Emma hugged Molly. “My pleasure. Next time we use the big bathroom. Or maybe my brother will renovate that bathroom to a his and hers.”

“Huh?” Tom frowned, glancing at Emma.

Emma giggled. “That’s my cue to leave.” She hugged Tom. “She really is your match, Tom.” Emma whispered in his ear.

Molly waited until the door shut before reaching over, playfully smacking Tom’s chest. 

“Brilliant acting job there! You had me going for a moment there.” 

Tom chuckled. “Right. Right. Let’s go.” He wrapped his arm around her waist.

-

Molly wasn’t lying when she said the party would be a piece of cake. She charmed everyone she spoke to. Tom most of all. He beamed, watching her from across the room. 

“You are positively glowing, Thomas.” Benedict sidled up next to him. “I guess that means the rumours are true.” Ben sipped his drink.

“Hmmm?” Tom turned to his friend, lost in thought. 

“Earth to Tom.” Ben mocked. 

Tom frowned at him. “I’m sorry, something distracted me. What was the question?” 

“Would that something be that young lady charming Mark Ruffalo, who is sporting a pretty diamond on an important finger?”

“And they said you shouldn’t play Sherlock.” Tom mocked. “That young lady happens to be Molly.”

“And what would be Molly’s last name?”

“Hiddleston.” Tom muttered.

“Is this a mysterious third sister?”

Tom threw Benedict a derisive glare. “Why don’t you just come out and ask the question, Benedict? It’s not a sister, that’s my wife. I got married. There, happy?” Tom huffed, downing half his cocktail. 

“Yes. But more importantly, are you happy?” 

Tom glanced over at Molly, laughing at something Mark said. “I am. I really am.” 

“Then, congratulations.” Ben clinked his glass with Tom’s.

-

Molly sidled up to the bar to catch a breath. 

“Cranberry and soda with a twist of lime.” she ordered, leaning against the bar. 

“Finally a moment alone with the belle of the ball.” A deep voice said next to Molly.

She turned to face none other than Chris Evans. He sipped on a bottle of beer, wearing a black on black suit with a brown tie. It shouldn’t work, but it did. 

“Captain America, himself.” She smiled and extended a hand. Chris shook it. “Pleasure to meet you.”

“Most people just call me Chris. And you, what do people call you?” He flashed a smile which she returned.

“Molly.”

Chris took another swig of beer. Molly licked her lips, watching. “So what do you do, Molly, besides charming the pants off of everyone in the room?”

- 

Tom’s head snapped around at Molly’s laugh from across the room. 

“Excuse me for a moment, Ben. I think Molly needs me.”

Benedict’s furrowed at how Tom could know that. Then he spied where Tom was beelining. The bar where Molly and Chris Evans stood in quite the animated conversation. He snaked his way through the crowd to get a better view.

-

Molly giggled. “That is too funny, Chris. Is it true that…” she sensed someone behind her. It was Tom. “Tom!”

“Oh you met Molly.” Chris offered.

Molly snorted. Tom’s hand wrapped around her waist, squeezing tight. Her stomach fluttered at Tom’s touch. 

“I have.” Tom snapped back. “She’s my wife.”

“Oh shit!” Chris held up his hands. “I’m so sorry man. I had no idea. Congratulations. That’s quite a girl you got there.” 

Molly smiled and relaxed against Tom. He kept his death grip on her waist, but he did smile at Chris.

“Darling, Benedict is dying to meet you. Can I steal you away?” 

Molly twisted to gaze up at Tom, cupping his cheek. “Of course, love.” She reached out to touch Chris’s arm, not noticing Tom’s smile faltering. “Steal away.”

Tom leaned down and kissed her lips before leading her away. 

-

After a quick chat with Benedict, Molly excused herself to the bathroom. Ben leaned into Tom.

“What the hell was that?” Ben hissed.

“I don’t know what you are talking about.” Tom tugged on his jacket.

“I mean that little territory marking over there with Evans.” Ben commented. “You practically whipped it out and peed on her.” 

“Don’t be crude. I was just… making sure Molly met you.” Tom lied. 

“Bullshit. You were jealous. Why? She married you.”

Tom sipped his drink. “It’s complicated.” 

“Then explain it to me.”

“Not here.” Tom hissed. 

“Then lunch, tomorrow.” Benedict offered. “Just you and me and the truth.”

Tom paled. Molly came back and wrapped her arm around him.

“Did I miss anything?”

“Nothing. Other than me missing you.”

“Aww.” Molly leaned her head against Tom’s chest. “I’m going to the bar. Do you gentlemen want anything?”

Tom perked up. “I’ll come with you.” 

Ben mumbled into his glass, emptying it. “Just whipping it out.” Tom shot him daggers.

“What was that?” Molly questioned.

“I am just heading out.” Ben said, covering. “Sophie will be expecting me.”

Molly leaned over and kissed Ben’s cheek. “I can’t wait to meet her. She sounds delightful.”

“She is.” Ben nodded. “Tom.” He extended his hand, and the two gave a quick hug.

“Benedict.” Tom responded tensely. 

Tom stuck to Molly’s side for the rest of the event. She appreciated the attention but was a little sad she didn’t get to finish up her conversation at Chris. She could swear Tom was keeping her from Chris. Molly shrugged off the feeling. 

She chattered on the ride home. 

“That was a lot fun, Tom. Everyone was nice.”

“They were.” Tom responded, gripping the steering wheel tight.

“Mark, Ben, Chris, and Robert.” 

Tom bristled at Chris’s name. He plastered on a smile. “But I’m the one going home with you.”

She placed her hand on top of his and ran her thumb over his knuckles. Each swipe sent electricity through Tom. 

“I hope I was convincing. You don’t think anyone suspects?” 

“What?” Tom glanced over at her. His voice grew more tense.

“About us. The whole fake marriage.” 

“Oh. No, darling, you were perfect.” 

He lifted her hand to his lips, kissing the back of it. The first true thing he had said for most of the night. Molly wasn’t just lovely. She was perfect. Damning and infuriatingly perfect. And he was in love with her. And she wasn’t in love with him.

Tom feigned being exhausted once they got home. 

“I’m off to bed.”

“Me too.” Molly pulled off her black pumps. Tom headed towards his room. “Wait. I forgot! Will you get my zipper? Emma had to do me up.” She spun around.

Tom gulped. “Sure.” His fingers shook as he tugged the zipper down. His fingertips grazing across Molly’s back. Her skin soft and warm.

“Th.. thanks.” Molly stuttered.

“You’re welcome.”

She held the dress up by crossing her arms in front of her. She kissed Tom’s lips. “Night, Tom.”

He kissed her back, not how he wanted to. He wanted to rip that dress off of her and push her against the wall and kiss her until she lost her breath and then kiss her some more. Just for good measure. 

He leaned back. “Good night, Molly.” His voice low and soft as if he didn’t trust to speak too loud. As if he would spook her and ruin everything.

Molly’s head dropped, and she headed to her room, door clicking shut.

“Shit!” Tom yanked his tie off. “Real fucking smooth Hiddleston.”

-

Tom begged off their run that morning, claiming he was too tired from last night. In fact, he didn’t get up until he had to leave to meet Benedict for lunch. 

Molly sat up when Tom came into the living room.

“Are you feeling okay?” She beckoned him over and she pressed her hand to his forehead. “No fever.”

“I’m fine. Just tired.” He kissed her cheek. “I appreciate your concern, though. I’m off to meet Ben. Think you’ll be okay for a few hours without me?” 

“I think I can manage.” Molly mock pouted. “But hurry home.”

“Yes, darling.” Tom smiled and gave her a quick peck before walking out the door.

-

Ben was already seated when Tom arrived at the pub. 

“Look like shit, Tom.” Ben commented.

“I didn’t sleep well last night.” Tom grabbed a menu and ordered a coffee and water. 

“The wife keep you up?” Ben sipped his beverage.

“Not exactly.”

“Yeah, what is that all about? And why would you be jealous of Evans?”

Tom groaned. “Can I at least get my coffee?”

“Nope.” Ben grinned a wide grin.

Tom sighed. “Okay so here is what happened…”

Benedict sat there silently while Tom relayed the whole sordid tale. He left nothing out, not even Clive. 

Tom gazed up at his friend. “Say something, Ben. The silence is deafening.”

Benedict pressed his fingers to his lips. “And Luke doesn’t know?”

“No.”

“And not your mother?”

“No. Just you.” Tom huffed. “And Molly.”

“Obviously. Seems rather simple.”

“Simple?! How is anything simple?! I am in love with her, Ben.” Tom stabbed at his food. “She’s all I think about.”

“See, simple. Tell her how you feel.” Ben smiled. “The two of you are already married. Seems like you skipped all the hard stuff.” 

“And when she rejects me? Not so simple. I can’t lose her.”

Ben stared at his friend. “You really are blind, aren’t you? I saw how she looked at you last night. There is something there, and it is not you paying off her student loans. Molly genuinely cares for you.”

Tom’s brows raised. “You think so.”

“I know so. Now let’s come up with a plan for you to woo your wife.”

Tom grinned. 

-

Molly settled back onto the couch, only to be interrupted by a knock on the door. 

“Tom?” she called out while moving to answer the door. “Did you forget your key—” She stopped short upon seeing who it was. “Oh, Chris.”

Evans stood there wearing a plain tee that clung to his classic A-frame torso. Molly stared for a bit. 

“Hi!” He smirked at her.

“Um, Tom left to have lunch with Ben.”

“Actually, I am here to invite you out to lunch. We never got to finish our conversation.” 

“Let me grab my coat.” 

Chris grinned as Molly grabbed her purse and coat before locking up. He slung an arm over her shoulder. “Now where is a good place to eat around here?”

Down in History

Summary: Your first award function with Henry as a couple.

Pairing: Henry x Reader

Word count: 1.3k

Warnings: Fluffy comfort

A/N: This is a birthday fic dedicated to the wonderful Lisa (@killjoy-assbutt-1112). Babe you deserve the world and here's to me trying to make your day a little brighter. Hope you enjoy and I'm sorry I'm a day late. 🙈

Also, thank you to @the-soot-sprite for helpful writing tips and @infinite-shite for listening to me talk about this. ❤️

Song inspo:

Title: Down in History

I looked out the window as hordes of paparazzi lined outside to snap a picture of their favorite celebs. The police tried to contain the crowd, failing miserably like I was failing to contain my growing anxiety.

Closing the curtains, I turned to the beautiful dress hanging on the mannequin. It was a gift from Henry for our first red carpet event tonight. I ran a hand lightly over the satin dress, feeling the silky fabric glid smoothly beneath my touch. The bodice was embroidered with silver crystals, glinting as the light caught in them.

I chewed on my bottom lip and wound my arms around my body. I was nervous beyond explanation. The media had dissected our relationship left, right and centre. They had scrutinized Henry for being with a girl who was nearly two decades younger than him, again.

"Miss," Maurice peered from behind the door, her cat-eyed glasses perched low on her nose. "We need to start getting ready." She informed and with a nod from me, she entered with her posse behind her.

I sat on the swirling chair they had placed in front of the mirror. While the ladies got to their work, I took the opportunity to look into my relationship with Henry.

As soon as our meetings became more frequent and the paps started getting more content, our faces started to appear on blogs and websites. My life became an open book with everyone trying to pull it apart piece by piece, commenting on things they had no business getting into. I had a fair idea about Henry's 19 year old ex-girlfriend and how much slack he had gotten for it. It was the sole reason why I was reluctant to officially date him even when he persistently asked for it.

After months of running into each other every day on our daily morning runs, Henry had finally stopped me for a chat one day. I had been a bubbling bundle of nerves when he had asked my name. The sexy Hollywood heartthrob seemed like he had planned on bumping into me that day for his questions seemed like he had memorized them. I wasn't the one to complain and when he had asked if I was free for coffee, I had agreed in a heartbeat.

"He's in the other room, miss. Maurice insisted that this room should be Female Central."

"Where's Henry?" I asked, turning slightly in my seat to look at our assistant sitting on a chair typing on her iPad. "I didn't see him since morning."

"Guilty." Maurice commented as she curled the ends of my hair to fall down my shoulder in waves. "Are you nervous?" She asked, talking to me through the reflection in the mirror.

"Very. I think I'll pass out even before I reach the red carpet."

She tapped lightly on my shoulder. "Don't worry. I heard Henry tell his friend he's not going to leave your side the entire night."

Despite all his efforts, I had once almost broken up with him. Henry had been away for filming and I had stayed back at his house. Somehow my location had gotten out to the public and I had been chased by the paps and fans, asking questions about Henry. I had locked myself in his house, too afraid to go out and when Henry was unavailable for calls because of the time difference, I had been a crying mess. In the heat of the moment, I had texted him that once he is back it is going to be over for us. After a long call later in the night, lots of crying and soothing, we had pulled through.

I felt a flutter in my heart.

Henry had been the most supportive boyfriend in the world. He had been with me through thick and thin, gently easing me in his life. He had promised me that whenever possible, he wouldn't let anyone harm my image in anyway. And he had rightfully held his promise. He had assigned PR representatives to look after my public image and gone as far as to make a big celeb gossip blog retract their article spreading personal information about my life.

Maurice eased me into my dress with the help of her assistants and started making the necessary adjustments to it. I stood with my arms out, looking at myself in the mirror and marveled at the image that looked back at me.

I worried about how people were going to perceive me tonight. They were going to complain how the dress had lost its charm because it was on me. Or they would comment how I look like Henry's child, like they always did. Or maybe this time they'll comment on the way my body was built.

My eyes welled up in tears and I sniffed, looking up and trying to not ruin the makeup. A knock on the door, distracted me from my inner turmoil. I waited for one of the ladies to open it and when they did, the sight in front of me nearly took my breath away.

Henry looked daper in a suit, made to perfectly fit his body. His eyes softened as he took notice of me and he entered through the door to walk towards me. "What's wrong baby?" He asked and took my hands in his.

Maurice and her assistants were done with their work on the dress and they quietly left the room to give us some privacy. I felt my lips tremble as the self doubt began clouding in my mind.

"I-I'm scared." I muttered. The welling tears in my eyes were threatening to fall down.

"But why? I'll be by your side the whole time. You don't have to worry about anything." He reassured me, walking me towards the bed and making me sit beside him.

"They are going to comment on our age," I mumbled quietly, twirling my fingers in a curl, refusing to look at him.

"I don't care, baby. And you shouldn't either. What's important is that we love each other and I accept you for who you are."

I weakly smiled at him as Henry kissed my cheek. The tears were threatening to fall but I managed to blink them away. He held my hand, gently circling his thumb over my skin in circles. I heard him sigh and run his free hand through his hair.

"What?" I asked, worried he had something running in his own mind.

"I was going to do this after the event, but-" He said before sliding down the bed and on his knee.

My mouth fell open, stunned at the turn of events. I stared at him wide eyed as Henry fished out a signature blue Tiffany&Co box from his pocket. He smiled sheepishly at me as I could only stare at him.

"Henry, what are you..."

"Baby, I love you. I have been searching for a person like you my whole life. I have never been happier before in my life. I don't care what people say, all I want is to spend the rest of my life with you." He pressed his lips, trying to breathe calmly. "Will you marry me, baby?"

Henry opened the box leaving me mesmerized by the beautiful double halo diamond ring sitting on the plush velvet cushion. But it wasn't the ring that made me cry, it was the love that seemed to be overflowing from within me for this man. I didn't care about the ruined makeup, nor the sobbing mess I was becoming.

I barely could nod a 'yes', before Henry with tears in his eyes smiled brightly up at me. He sat up and pulled me in for a hug as I wound my arms around his neck. He kissed my lips softly, before he pulled the ring out of its box. I bit my lip and watched as he slid the platinum band on my finger, overwhelmed by the rush of emotions as it sat snugly around my slim digit.

"Now, let's go to the event and let everyone know that you aren't just my girlfriend, but also my future wife." Henry said before kissing me until I couldn't breathe.

Him | Tony Stark x Male Reader

Fandom: Marvel

Pairing: Tony Stark x Male Reader

Summary: The team notices a new man around the tower and has questions.

…

Steve was in the training room going at the punching bag when he saw him. A man who he hadn’t seen before was walking past the gym. He was dressed in simple civilian clothes, not in a suit or uniform like many of the other tower inhabitants. It was strange. Steve wanted to talk with him but he was all sweaty and dirty.

Steve took a brisk shower before redressing and going to find the man. “Friday where’s the man from earlier at?” The A.I was silent. “Fri?” Steve asked again. “I’m sorry sir. I cannot give you that information at this time.” Steve stopped in his tracks and looked at the ceiling in confusion. “What do you mean you can’t give me that information?” It wasn’t like Friday to keep information like that away from the team. Steve was ready for the worst, maybe the man was an intruder. “Mr. Starks orders sir. I’m afraid I can’t say anything about our guest until Mr.Stark allows it.”

Steve found that even more suspicious. What was Tony hiding from them? 

…

Clint was in the kitchen with Natasha when the elevator opened and Pepper walked in. However Pepper wasn’t alone this time, next to her was a man they hadn’t met before. “I’m glad everything's going alright for you Pepp. I really am. You deserve this for all the hard work you’ve been doing over the years.”

Clint and Nat couldn’t help but watch the interaction. Pepper said a quick hi to both of them and the man offered his own smile and nod before they moved on to another part of the tower. Once the two were sure to be far enough Clint turned to Natasha. “Who was that? He wasn’t dressed like any business partner.”

Nat only shrugged but Clint could tell by the look on her face, she was just as curious. “Maybe he’s an old friend?” Clint clapped his hands. “I bet he’s an ex. I bet Tony’s jealous.” Nat couldn’t help the laugh that came from Clint’s comment. “Stop it. Don’t want them to hear us. Pepper will end you.”

It was about that time that Tony came into the kitchen. Nat and Clint watched as he walked past them and grabbed a cup of coffee. They didn’t stop looking even when he turned around. “What? You two are acting stranger than normal today. Don’t tell me you broke one of my toys.” Nat roller her eyes. “Who’s that guy with Pepper.” If Tony hesitated or broke a sweat, neither spy noticed. “Hhmm? I’m not sure what you’re talking about. I don’t know who Pepper hands out with.” 

Clint was about to ask him something else, but the billionaire quickly left the room with his coffee. “Sorry gotta go finish this project.” Clint and Nat only watched him go and then at each other. They weren’t about to let it go anytime soon.

…

Bruce and Thor were in the bio lab. Bruce was working on some project while Thor was more or less just bothering Bruce with stupid questions. Of course Thor knew this but loved messing with the poor scientist. Bruce wouldn’t admit it but having Thor there was almost comforting in a way.

Thor was telling Bruce about one of his many adventures. “And then I said- wait. Who’s that Banner?” Bruce looked up from his work to follow Thor’s gaze. There he saw a man walk into one of the storage rooms and used his handprint to open the secure storage. “I-don’t know. Maybe he’s a new intern?” The man eventually left holding a storage compartment of Vibranium. Bruce was curious about who that man was and what he was doing.

“Friday. Who is that? Is he a new intern?” The A.I would usually tell him. “I’m sorry Dr.Banner. I can’t say anything per Mr.Stark’s orders.” Bruce found THAT even more strange. “Does Steve or any of the others know?” He wanted to know what was going on. “Mr.Rogers asked earlier but I said the same thing I said to you. Mr.Stark says he’ll tell you when it’s time.” 

Bruce settled for that answer. He was curious but he figured Tony knew what he was doing...this time. Thor on the other hand was fidgeting for an answer. “Not even a hint?”

…

Peter swung from building to building until finally he landed on the launch pad in Tony’s workshop. He took off his mask and walked in. “Mr.Stark I’m here! Ready to do some-” He stopped in his tracks when the man in front of him wasn’t Tony but someone else. “Oh. Hello, you must be Peter. I’m (M/N). Tony’s talked a lot about you.” (M/N) lifted up his hand for a handshake and Peter shook it. 

He himself was still shook.

It wasn’t long before Tony returned. He smiled as he saw Peter with (M/N). “Underoos! I see you’ve met (M/N), don’t worry he’s not as scary as he looks.” He clapped his hands on Peter’s shoulder and Peter swore he saw a connection between his mentor and (M/N). 

“I’ll leave you two to your toys. I’ll see you later Tones.” He walked to the door. “Have fun boys. But not too much fun for YOU.” He points at Tony and Tony makes an exaggerated hurt expression. “I never get to have fun.”

Once (M/N) was gone, Tony got to work like nothing happened and Peter couldn’t get over it. “What just happened?”

…

Steve entered the living room to see that everyone else had gathered. “So...I’m guessing the rest of you have seen our newest visitor?” The others nodded to him. “Does anyone know who he is?” Bruce asked, looking towards Natasha who shrugged. “Beats me. I have no idea who he is.” They all spoke amongst themselves until Peter spoke up. “He said his name was (M/N).” That got everyone’s attention. “What did you say Peter?” Steve asked and Clint seemed to get interested. “You talked to him kid? What else did he say?” Peter only shrugged as he kicked his feet up in his seat. “Yeah. He was in Tony’s lab when I arrived. Almost had a heart attack since he saw me without my mask but he was really nice and apparently Mr.Stark talks about me with him.” Now THAT really got the others attention.

The talking just got louder and louder. “So he’s Tony’s friend?” “Maybe Pepper and him really are a thing?” “Perhaps Tony let him have access to the lab?” “Why wouldn’t he tell us?” It wasn’t long before Tony walked in and stopped as he saw the pandemonium going on. “Whaaat’s going on? Whatever it is I didn’t do it!” 

The avengers all turned to him and Clint pointed his finger. “You. You got some explaining to do!” Tony only gave him a confused look as the others calmed down enough. It was Steve that asked him the question they all were wondering. “Tony. Who exactly is (M/N)? Is he a friend?” With that Tony laughed. “Is he a friend? Oh cap you’re hilarious. Honestly I don’t have to tell you anything I don’t want to. But since you’re all curious and he’s decided he’s ready...come on in.” Everyone gave him a strange look and soon (M/N) joined them in the living room.

He gave a wave. “Hello everyone! I’m (M/N), it’s nice to meet you all.” Everyone waved back and said their own hellos. Peter waved with a bit more enthusiasm than the rest. “So (M/N) are you a friend of Tony’s?” Steve asked. “Yeah and are you and Pepper a thing?” Clint budged in. That made Tony and (M/N) laugh. “No, no Pepper and I aren’t a thing. As for how I know Tony…” Thor spoke up this time. “Ah! You’re a new intern! That’s why Miss Potts was showing you around and why you were in Stark's lab! I figured it out everyone! Not to worry.” Tony only looked at him like he had lost his mind and (M/N) chuckled again. “No, I’m not a new intern. But I could be one if I wanted to be.” He paused and looked at Tony who only smiled at him and wrapped an arm around him.

 “I’m Tony’s husband. I’m (M/N) Stark.”

Valentine's Special Prompt Game

Prompt: Blind date / Set up by friends.

Pairing: Jeon Jungkook x Male Reader

Word Count: 1,2k

Genre: Fluff

Masterlist

"I promise he's really nice!"

"Of course he is." You sarcastically say after rolling your eyes. "I've been told that tons of times before. I won't fall for your promises this time."

Jimin groans and takes a seat in front of you, bending over a little, wanting your attention on him as he starts to speak again.

"I know you've had bad dates befo-"

"Bad dates?!" You gasp, finally daring to look at him in the eye. "Do I have to remind you how the last guy I went out with spent the whole night crying over his ex boyfriend?"

Jimin inevitably chuckles at the remembrance of how you came back earlier to the apartment with a infuriating expression on your face, swearing you would never agree again to go on a blind date; especially a one set up by him.

"Okay, I take the whole responsibility of that. I should have know that! I thought he changed, though."

"Whatever. I'm not going on another date."

Jimin lifts his hands up in surrender, "Okay, but could you please hear about him? He's the nicest guy I've met, and he's willing to have a date after being single for a long time."

You think about it for a moment before nodding, making your friend smile. "Great! So, his name is Jeon Jungkook, he's 2 years younger than us, and I think you've seen him before. Remember when you came to the dance studio to pick me up to grab lunch? Last month."

"Oh, the tall guy with tattoos?" There's a hint of interest in your tone that makes Jimin giggle. He nods as an answer. "Okay... keep talking."

Convincing you to make you go on that date was easier than Jimin thought it'd be.

"Are you sure you gave me the right adress?"

"Yeah, I did. You're already there?" Jimin speaks on the other line.

"It's a thrift store."

"I know, don't you think it's a great idea for a first date?"

"I don't know if you are fooling around but right now it isn't the time to do so!"

Jimin wholeheartedly laughs, "Trust me. You'll love it."

"I see him coming. If it ends up being terrible I'll physically hurt you."

"Sure thing. Have fun!" And he ends the call.

Jungkook introduces himself with a shy smile on his face. You're finally able to look at him with detail; the black ink decorating his skin of his arms and hands, his big sparkling doe eyes, his marvelous smile and pink tinted cheeks. Jimin was right, he is really charming.

"By the look in your eyes I'm guessing Jimin didn't tell you what is all this about, right?"

"I don't! So, mind telling me what are we going to do?"

Jungkook smiles softly at you, "He has told me you're very competitive, is that right?"

"Oh my god, please tell me he didn't tell you about the chicken wings incident."

"No, but now I'm interested on that." He lets out a laugh, which makes you feel instantly flustered. "Actually, I am very competitive myself, too. And I can see you too have a great sense of fashion, so... We're making outfits for each other today! The winner gets to choose the place we're having dinner after this."

"I love it, but how do we know who's the winner?"

"Jimin, of course."

"Right, I should have know."

Jungkook extends his hand for you to grab it. "Shall we go inside, then?"

You gladly take it, first taking a look in all the hallways of the store before starting to pick clothes.

As you do it, you start a simple and carefree conversation about yourselves and your interests. Turns out you two have a lot in common and that makes you wonder how come Jimin never told you about him. So far you think he is really nice and easygoing.

You get to try some of the clothes you keep gathering, sharing your thoughts about it and complimenting each other, which keeps you two smiling the whole time. After some jokes, laughter and pictures taken together,  you are on your final looks and decide to send the pics to Jimin, who deliberates that Jungkook is the winner.

"Not gonna lie, I love what you chose for me. I am definitely gonna experiment with this style from now on." Jungkook admits as you two exit the store, still wearing the outfit you end up buying.

"I am glad you like it, it suits you! And you just made me look thousands times more stylish. My closet and I are forever grateful."

Jungkook chuckles and grabs your hand again and starts walking on an unknown direction. "I know a great place over here."

"Awesome, I don't think I've been here before. You live near here?"

"No, but with the dance crew we used to hang out nearby really often."

That leads to another chill conversation in which you get to know each other a little bit more. He was right about the place, since you think it's really nice and casual, which makes the atmosphere comfortable for you two.

The night goes perfectly, and you really think that Jungkook is someone you would definitely have a second date with. Maybe, if things work out, have something more formal.

When's time to leave, Jungkook offers to pay for you, to which you immediately reject.

"Oh no, let me pay for it!"

"I insist, I'll pay for you!"

You laugh at his stubbornness and the way he wrinkles his nose, but that gives you an idea; the perfect excuse: "How about this, we split the bill and you pay on the second date."

Jungkook blushes and nods. "Only if you pay on the third one, though."

With a big smile you answer, "Gladly."

Later you are in front of your apartment, staring at each other with nervous smiles and fidgeting fingers.

"I had so much fun today," He starts. "Actually, this has been the best date I've ever had. For real."

"Me too! Honestly, I didn't know how much I needed to do this. I am so glad it turned out this way." You agree. "It's so nice to meet someone so easygoing and nice like you."

You two exchange phone numbers and share a hug, in which Jungkook takes the opportunity to leave a kiss on your cheek, making you blush.

"See you soon?" He shyly asks.

"Of course," You reply and wave your hand. "Goodnight, Jungkook."

Once you get to your floor and enter the apartment, Jimin is already waiting anxiously for you, looking at you with curiosity.

"So?! How did it go?!"

You plop down on the sofa right next to him and give him a tight hug, "Have I ever told you how much I love you?"

Jimin laughs, "I told you. Aren't I the best friend you've ever had?"

"An angel sent from above."

After you tell him all about your date and get ready to go to bed, your phone buzzes a couple of times. You unlock it to see the messages are from Jungkook.

I really had a great time today, and I actually didn't thank you for it

So thank you!

I am really looking forward meeting you again

Goodnight, _____ :)

He attached some of the pictures he took of you and the ones you took in front of the big mirror on that thrift store, and you couldn't believe your luck.

Agreeing on going to this date was the best decision you've ever made.

A Few Thoughts About Hurt/Comfort

I have been asked this month to make a post about hurt/comfort in Avengers comics. And I love h/c -- I actually have a massive number of WIPs right now that are h/c -- so I am very happy to talk about it! Anyway, this is not really all that planned out and this mostly turned into an excursus on Tony Stark's pain. I'm sure you're all surprised.

Like pretty much everyone else, I'm sure, I have found that everything lately has been... pretty tough. And the coping mechanism that really got me through last year and this year was reading and writing a lot of h/c, on the theory that, however lousy a day I'm having, I can absolutely make sure that Tony Stark has a worse one. And then I can make sure he gets hugs. Wish fulfillment? Why, yes. (Once at Hallmark I was trying to find a "get well soon" card, forgot what it was called, and described it to my wife as "a hurt/comfort card.") I think Marvel Comics -- the Avengers side, in particular -- is an interesting canon for h/c for a lot of reasons. Though, honestly, if you asked me to recommend you, a hurt/comfort fan, a new fandom, I would probably just hand you some Starsky & Hutch DVDs. Go watch "The Fix" and get back to me later. If you like that, there's way more where that came from. But there's still lots to love in Marvel! Superhero comics are really a goldmine as far as the hurt side of h/c. Because superheroes, and you probably have noticed this, get hurt a lot. They get hurt repeatedly, in fantastical ways that are probably impossible in real life both physically and emotionally (at least, I don't think anyone's invented mind control yet), and even the heroes without superhuman healing powers tend to get physically hurt a whole lot worse than actual people can take. Currently in Iron Man comics, Tony has a broken back and is dealing with this by locking himself into the armor as a backboard and injecting himself with massive doses of painkillers. He's busy! He's got stuff to do! He doesn't have time to lie around and heal! So, basically, if you name a kind of pain that you would like to see happen to a character, it's probably happened to superheroes. Multiple times. The downside, though, is that comics do not really deliver that well when it comes to the comfort part of h/c. They could. It's not inherent to the medium that they don't. But because of the serial nature of comics and also the fact the primary audience is dudes who want to read about people in spandex punching each other, a lot of the time they don't really feel the need to provide closure and write about people dealing with any of the hurt. (Raise your hand if you're still annoyed with the end of Hickman's Avengers run.) But at the same time, I think that's a quality that makes Avengers ripe for h/c fanfic. Because, generally speaking, fandom likes to provide the things that canon doesn't, and fandom is more than happy to provide the comfort. If you enjoy canonical h/c in comics, I think you really can't go wrong with Iron Man. One of the big innovations of modern Marvel Comics was the concept that heroes would also suffer from relatable human problems, and in practice what this means is that a lot of heroes start with a fully-loaded angst-ridden backstory and origin story, ripe for h/c. So Tony starts out by incurring a heart injury that he fully expects is going to kill him, which he responds to by vowing he won't get close to anyone so they won't be sad when he dies, and throughout the early Silver Age is constantly on the brink of death as his heart nearly gives out on him practically every issue. And then even after his heart gets (mostly) better, there are various plots involving his armor being detrimental to his health and him choosing to fight on anyway. It's hard for me to think of another superhero hitting that particular variety of h/c in exactly the same way. Sure, superheroes risk their lives constantly, because this is how superhero comics work, but Tony is the only one I can think of who is this constantly this badly off, physically. Like, think of all the other heroes who have had a continual solo presence as fan favorites across Marvel history -- Captain America, Thor, Spider-Man, Wolverine, maybe even Deadpool. You know what those guys all have? Healing factors! For the most part, they are not running around continually on the verge of death, and while there are certainly memorable arcs involving several of them being severely injured and/or dead, you really have to work at it. It's not their constant state of affairs, whereas Tony is the kind of superhero who shows up to a fight already bleeding out under his armor. Yeah, I know Extremis gave him a healing factor. But he didn't have it very long, and also he did some extremely dangerous things while he did have it; I'm pretty sure I've never seen Wolverine saying that he'll just solve a problem by cutting off his own foot. So, anyway, yeah, there are a bunch of good arcs involving h/c for Tony. If you're looking for physical injury, he has a whole bunch of heart problems over the years, gets several new hearts, then ruins his brain, et cetera. That level of hurt is basically the background pain of Tony's life; every so often, his heart will get damaged or he'll have to live in the armor or the armor will be killing him, et cetera. If you're looking for more unusual trauma, I am, as always, going to rec Manhunt, a relatively obscure arc in late v3 (IM v3 #65-69) in which Tony has an extremely bad week. His tech is stolen and used to bomb a building. Then he gets shot in the chest. Then while he's at the hospital a nurse tries and fails to poison him, and she then tries to beat him to death. Then he checks himself out of the hospital and a helicopter shoots missiles at him. Then he becomes a fugitive from justice. And then, oh, yeah, he has to fight the Mandarin. It is... a lot. (Volume 3 of Iron Man is pretty good as far as h/c possibilities. You've got a lot of physical pain, Carol's drinking arc, the Sentient Armor, both DreamVision arcs, and Manhunt. Manhunt is finally supposed to be out in trade this month, by the way.) There are of course the drinking arcs, which probably count as their own type of hurt. But if you haven't read the second drinking arc (IM #160-200), please do. Marvel likes to up the stakes on events (Fear Itself, Secret Empire) by making Tony drink, and it does work, I think. I feel like I've spoken at length about Tony's drinking elsewhere so I don't really want to rehash it all here. And then there's the emotional pain. Angst and drama is something that happens to a whole bunch of characters, yes, especially in comics, but somehow Tony seems to end up with possibly more than his fair share of it. Fandom likes to make a lot of Howard Stark's A+ Parenting, so much so that you might think, if you didn't know canon, that this was just fandom running with a throwaway mention of Tony's terrible childhood and making it worse. But, no, canon really does go there with a reasonable amount of frequency. Howard's actual first appearance is in a flashback where he's ordering teenage Tony to break up with his girlfriend because she's the daughter of one of Howard's business rivals. And then we get into the verbal abuse, and the physical abuse, and the time Howard made Tony take his first drink, and the part where Howard was a demon in hell who Tony fought while he insulted him. And more! Currently, in canon, Howard is alive again and is in league with Mephisto for the express purpose of ruining Tony's life. Also when Tony was a baby, Howard tried to trade him to Dracula. I think you can make an argument that fandom is actually showing restraint when compared to canon. Tony also has a whole lot of Terrible Exes whose presence and/or former presence in Tony's life can be used for a lot of hurt. If you've read any amount of fanfic, you probably know that the exes who get the most play in fandom are Sunset Bain and Tiberius Stone -- not that Tony and Ty were ever canonically a couple, of course, but fandom is definitely enamored of this idea. Ty and Sunset both have relatively similar interactions with Tony in canon, in that they are both liars and emotional abusers, heavy on the gaslighting, with the purpose of becoming more successful than Tony. They both also attempt to murder Tony, although this is after he figures out they're evil, at least. (Yes, I know, this is not how either of them usually appear in AUs.) Tony also has a bunch of exes who also have just straight-up tried to murder or otherwise hurt him, sometimes while they are dating, and sometimes before Tony dates them: Whitney Frost, Indries Moomji, Kathy Dare, and Maya Hansen come to mind. There are probably more I'm not thinking of! But, yes, if you want to write about a guy in a series of terrible relationships, please consider Iron Man comics. If mind control is one of your favorite flavors of hurt, Tony's pretty good for that too. We all know about The Crossing. I suppose when I say "mind control" I mostly mean "armor control" because there are an awful lot of plots where someone else makes Tony's armor do whatever they want it to do and Tony is along for the ride -- Demon in a Bottle, Sentient Armor, and Execute Program are the first things that come to mind. There is also a fairly obscure What If that is What If Iron Man Lost The Armor Wars in which Justin Hammer apparently really wants Tony in a mind control collar to take off all his clothes and lounge around in his underwear. No, really. I think a lot of pain for Tony often revolves around his issues with control, generally -- his alcoholism comes into play here again. The entire aftermath of Civil War is also notable for its propensity to hurt Tony over and over and over. Is he stoically soldiering on through his grief after Steve dies? Hell, no! He cries, like, six separate times. He 100% blames himself for Steve's death. It's great. Everybody loves The Confession and the funeral in Fallen Son, but one of my personal favorites is Avengers/Invaders, in which Tony is confronted with a time-traveling Steve from WWII and in order not to screw up the timeline, he can't tell Steve he knows him. He is clearly not coping well. He shuts himself in a room with a giant wall of pictures of Steve! Also there's a part where he has to try to convince Steve he can trust him and he ends up having to tie Steve to a chair to talk to him, and Steve looks at him and asks, "Who did you kill to get where you are?" and I feel like that is probably one of the worst moments in Tony's life. No wonder he gave himself amnesia. So now we might want to ask, okay, but why is hurting Tony in fanfiction so much fun? I mean, I can tell you why I think it's fun. I can't speak for anyone else. One reason is that he is very emotional and very affected by everything he does. Sometimes you will see people complaining that the heroes of m/m fanfic cry too much and this is not realistic. This is not a problem if you're writing Tony! He can cry as much as you want and it's perfectly in character. I don't think it would be as fun to hurt him if he didn't express so much of his pain. But he does. He also feels guilty, and for me that's a very satisfying character element. If he were well-adjusted and didn't blame himself for so many things, it wouldn't be nearly as fun as watching him blame himself for everyone whose death he thinks he is responsible for, whether or not he is. And then he just keeps going, and it's, y'know, nice to watch him be resilient, too. So, I guess, I think hurting him is interesting because it's easy to hurt him, his weak points are pretty obvious, and he reacts a lot. Steve doesn't hurt quite as much as Tony does, in canon. It's certainly possible to hurt him -- I mean, they did actually kill him after Civil War, after all -- but I don't think the canonical patterns of hurting him are as numerous. Obviously deseruming Steve is a fairly popular go-to in terms of physical hurt; he's been deserumed at least three times that I know of. I think's easy to see the appeal there of taking a character who is fairly physically resilient and making him... much less so. Certainly Marvel seems to see the appeal. But other than that I don't think he has any other really common way to get physically injured. Unlike Tony, whose origin story is basically "oh no, I've acquired a disability," Steve's origin story is "I drank a serum that cured all my disabilities." Which, I mean, great wish fulfillment but there's not really as much there to poke at. Pretty much all of Steve's pain is emotional, but, unlike Tony, his pain isn't often specifically in response to someone directly, purposefully hurting him. Hickman's Avengers run is a big exception, yes. His pain seems to come up most often as a kind of situational angst. He feels like a man out of time. He feels out of touch with the modern era, with people his own age. He feels guilt because he feels responsible for Bucky's death. He feels like he can't trust the government and therefore he can't be Captain America. He worries that he doesn't know how to have a normal life. And, yes, these are deep and important worries but it's different than, like, Indries Moomji dumping Tony with the intent to make him sad enough to start drinking. Very few of Steve's villains want to personally ruin Steve's entire life the way Tony's villains do; mostly they just want to do things like bring back the Nazis. In terms of Steve's potential for h/c, I think Steve is harder to hurt than Tony is. Physically, he is definitely harder to hurt. You can deserum him, sure, but unless you want everything you write to be a deseruming fic you're probably not going to want to do that more than a couple of times. And if you want to hurt him physically while he has the serum, you have to hurt him hard. Usually past the point where a regular human would ever survive it. He's also harder to break, emotionally, than Tony is -- which means it's very satisfying when you can get him to break, but this is a guy who's only cried twice (that I remember) in canon. So if you want to get him to cry, you really, really have to wreck him, and he doesn't have as many obvious weak spots. He also doesn't generally sit around blaming himself for things that aren't his fault, and the whole "stewing in guilt" genre of plots for him basically came down to "he was sad that he thought Bucky's death was his fault," and that's really the biggest regret he seems to have, and also Bucky's not dead anymore. The Steve/Tony relationship itself, I would think, is also appealing to h/c fans because canon provides a lot of ways for them to hurt each other. Some people only ship pairings who would never, y'know, take turns beating each other half to death in major event comics. (And for a lot of Marvel Comics history, that was also Steve & Tony, so if you want them to be BFFs who have never fought, you can just set your fic earlier.) They have definitely hurt each other both physically and emotionally, so if you're looking for something easy and satisfying as a h/c fan, you can just read or write something where they... make up. What about Marvel characters other than Steve and Tony? Surely some of them are angsty, yes? Well, yes, but also it depends on the particular flavor of angst that you like. If you like the way Tony hurts, you may very well enjoy Doctor Strange comics, because they have a very similar attitude towards life -- they are both former alcoholics whose origin stories involve physical disabilities, who routinely make tactical decisions that negatively affect their continued existence and/or happiness a whole lot. It's very much an "I must suffer alone in the dark and no one will ever know what I am doing to save the world but it's the right thing to do" sort of vibe. Like, you can read comics where Strange is lying in hell with two broken legs, hallucinating that Clea has finally come to save him. Strange's biggest fear, akin to Tony's control issues, is basically that one day he's going to be an asshole again, so he's out there trying as hard as he can to do good. Also, if you like tentacles, he has all of them. I mean that. Carol also occasionally hits similar angst spots, and her drinking arc is great. A lot of people like Natasha, too; I have read zero Black Widow comics but I get the impression many people enjoy her brand of angst. The mutant metaphor is a little different in terms of overall vibe, but some people really like it as a source of angst -- the whole "protecting a world who hates and fears them" thing. It may not work for you, but if you like your hurt to include things like systemic oppression, go pick up some X-Men comics. Start with something like God Loves Man Kills. I feel like I liked this sort of thing a lot more as a teenager but that I kind of aged out of liking the mutants quite so much. It's also worth mentioning that not everything that hits the spot in one universe will be the same in the others, and I'm mentioning this because I feel like I have to say something about MCU Bucky. MCU fandom seems to get a lot of mileage out of Bucky's guilt about being the Winter Soldier, everything he was forced to do, et cetera. I have definitely read my share of those fics, and FATWS sure went right for that angst too. But as far as I can tell, he doesn't hit the same way at all in 616. And I like him a lot in 616; I'm always pleased when he shows up on a team. (He was so good in Strikeforce. Everyone was so good in Strikeforce.) But the thing is, 616 Bucky is, basically, phenomenally well-adjusted, given everything he's gone through, and I'm including the time he wrestled a bear in a gulag. He gets over having been the Winter Soldier, and now he's just, y'know, a guy with a cool arm who likes to bring guns to every fight to horrify his teammates, and he snarks at Clint. If you're looking for that angst, that is really not him these days. He's all better. So pretty much all that is canon. So what do we do in fandom for h/c? Well, as far as I can tell, a decent amount of it is canon-based or very canon-close -- there are a whole lot of stories exploring the angst of Civil War or Hickman's Avengers run. Tony's drinking comes up a fair amount, and if one of Tony's Evil Exes comes back to haunt him, it's pretty much only Tiberius Stone. I don't think I've read a lot of fic with Steve getting deserumed; it doesn't seem as popular in fandom as in canon. When Steve gets hurt, he tends to just get physically whumped pretty hard, and there's a fair amount of that for Tony too, but of course Steve can take more. There's also a thriving, uh, subgenre of pain involving Hydra Steve doing terrible things to Tony, presumably the terrible things he would have wanted to do to Tony in canon if Tony had had a flesh body. There's the usual kinds of h/c setups that appear in basically every fandom as well -- sickfic, whump, dub-con/non-con. You get the idea. But since fandom in general likes to take specific inspiration from canon, there's a lot of fic where the hurt tends to resemble things that happen more in canon. Like, I feel like comics fic probably has more tentacle fic and more mind control than canons that don't come pre-stocked with those. Probably everybody has a whole lot of "tied up by bad guys," though. And then, of course, fandom brings the comfort that canon does not. This is true in pretty much every fandom -- I mean, you aren't going to find a lot of actual canons where Character A saves Character B from mortal peril and then there's gay sex -- but, like I was saying, comics don't provide a lot of closure before it's onto the next thing. Usually with a different creative team, who has no interest in wrapping up anything from the last team. Steve and Tony talked about the incursions exactly once after Secret Wars and nobody mentioned the part where Steve spent several months trying to hunt Tony down and kill him. Tony is never going to remember the events of Civil War. Hydra Steve died ignominiously in a fire and no one has ever talked about him again. Honestly, if you're looking for a way to get some comfort in your fanfic, picking an event, any event, and just having the characters talk about it will be way more than any of them get in canon. I feel like honestly that can often be a pretty satisfying to read. And even though comics canon physically hurts characters pretty often and pretty badly, they also often skip right past the recovery. Maybe you'll get one page of a character in a hospital bed at the end of the story arc. Maybe you won't. Demon in a Bottle has one splash page of Tony going through alcohol withdrawal and then he's all better. I think Manhunt skips to Tony getting out of the hospital at the end. That's just not a story that they want to tell very often. The second drinking arc is notable in that it devotes almost as many issues to Tony's recovery as it does to getting him to rock-bottom. Similarly, Steve is done with his Nomad angst way way faster than you probably think he is (though The Captain does go in for a fair number of issues). So one of the things we often want to do in fandom is focus on all the bits that canon skips over, both in the "why did no one ever mention this story arc ever again" way and the "wow, so how long are they in the hospital after that" way. That's really all I can think of about h/c! I'm off to write some more of it!

Title: That Old Thing Back {One Shot} ***

Charlie Hunnam x Ex-Wife Reader

Warning: Cursing, Angst, POV Changes, LOTS OF WORDS, NSFW, Mentions of miscarriage

Words: 8,888k 

Note: Okay, this is a first for Charlie. I am not familiar with his mannerisms at all, so I hope this hits well. If not, anon, I am sorry. As always, thank you all for reading! Also, y’all see 8888 words. 8888 must mean something right.

 ***Loosely Edited/Proofread***

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When you meet someone, within minutes, you know what you want from them. After the first conversation, you know what capacity you want them in your life. After a week, you know just how you feel about them. Charlie could attest to this. When he first saw you, he couldn’t keep his eyes off you. He was mesmerized by you and just sat and marveled as you danced around the great lawn of the park he happened to be in that afternoon. You looked carefree and so full of life. Nine other women were dancing with you, but he could only see you.

 That led him to stalk you for the remainder of the afternoon. Once the class was finished, he followed behind you and listened to your conversation as you walked through the streets and fell deeper under your spell. Your voice was like a finely tuned melody that sounded better than any song he’d ever heard. He sat in the same restaurant you did and just watched you as you spoke and laughed. Every story you told was so animated he felt like he’d been right there when it happened. You were the most captivating creature he’d ever seen.

 By the time he knew what had happened, he’d pushed his entire day to the side and had followed you, and he didn’t regret one thing. When he least expected it, you confronted him and called him out on his stalker antics, and that only made him want to know you more. It was the perfect imperfect meet. From that day, the two of you had been inseparable. You spent all your free time together. When he told you his aspiration to be an actor, you didn’t laugh or tell him to forget it and be more practical. You were his biggest supporter, and he fell harder for you.

A whirlwind, passion-filled eight-month romance led to him proposing and begging you to spend your life with him. When you excitedly screamed yes and leaped on him in the middle of the restaurant, everyone around you elated and showered you with applause and well wishes. The two of you didn’t bother waiting. A month later, you were married and more in love than ever. Neither of you were prepared when CJ came around, but it made your love deeper, your marriage stronger.

 You were by his side as he struggled through audition after audition, waiting for his big break. You were there rejection after rejection, always having his back and pushing him never to give up. You were his backbone, and when that role came, you were right there for him. The rolls came in one after the other, which meant he was gradually becoming busier and busier. Before you knew it, he was always on a movie set, and you were always home with CJ.

 No one prepared him for the struggles of marriage, a baby, and his budding career. He was warned about it by his agent early on, but he swore the two of you had what it took to withstand any and all struggles. He hadn’t factored himself in as a struggle. Thanks to his rapid rise to fame, everyone wanted a piece of him, and when they took their piece, there was none left for you. The arguments increased, and the miscommunication and unsaid words took a toll. The space that formed between you was wide enough to classify them as chasms.

 It seemed like he couldn’t do anything right. Everything he said was wrong. When he took a weekend off of work, it was wrong because you found it clear he would rather be working. When he tried to get close to you for any affection, you were always tired from your day with CJ, and every time you tried, he was too busy. He got lost in the Hollywood lifestyle, the parties, the socializing, the life that was bullshit, and had nothing on you or CJ. He turned into the monster in the fairytale, the monster that mothers warned their daughters about.

 He’d lost track of how many times he’d heard you crying, lost track of how many times he’d struggled with what to do, how to be. It wasn’t that he wanted to hurt you, he just didn’t know how to be who you wanted, how you needed him to be. The last straw was him missing your birthday to remain at the Cannes Film Festival, the festival he got pictured in a compromising position. One he was entirely at fault for, but one where absolutely nothing happened. The last thing you said to him was, “Your priorities are all fucked up, if you don’t want us fine I’ll solve the problem.”

 He came home to divorce papers and an empty house and not too long after you were in the hospital suffering from a miscarriage. A miscarriage the doctors blamed on stress, a miscarriage you blamed on him, a miscarriage he blamed himself for. After that, you made it clear you were done with him. He had the thought to contest and fight for you, but he knew the same problems would still be there. He had to face the facts that you’d probably grown too far apart, and that he would only cause you pain. He had to let you go. So, let you go he did.

 Groaning, he rubbed his face trying to keep the sleep at bay. The sound of the waves at his Malibu home was the soothing back noise he needed. It was the same noise that propelled him deep into his state of depression. It was a sate he’d been fighting for the last year. He’d been mostly successful, but tonight was hard. Tonight, was the anniversary of what would have been your seventh wedding anniversary.

 The whole night he’d been haunted by memories, haunted by feelings, and haunted by every regret he’d held on to for the last near two years. He thought of scenarios where he should have said something when he hadn’t said anything. He thought about the times he didn’t do something when he should have dome something—anything. He regretted everything that led to this point, the point where he had no wife and a son he was missing that was growing up without seeing him every day.

 “Fuck!” His shout was loud, and though the beach was vast, it still somehow echoed around him. There was no escaping you. He’d tried like hell every day, especially when you moved said the most hurtful words you’d ever said to him.

 -Fourteen Months Earlier-

 “Leave Charlie; you’re good at that.”

 “That’s not fair, Y/N, and you know it!”

 You spun around with pure vitriol radiating from you. “Fair! Do you know what’s not fair? It’s not fair that I’ve been by your side through everything, supporting you and loving you fiercer than a mother lion to her cubs, birthed your son, held you down through everything, the struggle, the good times only to have you do this!”

 “You’re the one who left me, Y/N!”

 He knew he shouldn’t have thrown that at you. He knew it was a bad idea.

 “Let’s be real. You left me long before I left you! Plus, what was there to stay for, a man who turned out to be my biggest mistake?”

  -Present Day-

 With his phone in hand, he pulled up your contact. It was one that he stared at so often—too often, he opened up his messages and did the only thing his head told him to.

 MSG My Wife: It’s insane today would have been our 7th anniversary. Seven years. The day I said those vows to you were the happiest day of my life until the day you told me about CJ. I thought seven would be just the beginning for us. I fully expected seventeen, twenty-seven, thirty-seven, seventy. I probably shouldn’t be sending this, but there was no way I could fight it. God, Y/N, this has always been my favorite day. Now it’s one of the most painful.

 He tossed his phone on the side table and dropped his head back, praying he could forget and move on. It was clear you’d already done it.

 As if that wasn’t enough, to add insult to injury, four days later he was staring down at the date your divorce was finalized. It was irony at its best and a just punishment for him. He’d been suffering the last year, so much, so pain felt like his best friend. He just wallowed in everything he’d lost, wallowed in it with no intention to pull himself out. It was that same pain that had him on this interstate driving out of LA to the place he shouldn’t be going anywhere near.

 When he pulled up inside the yard, he sat in his mustang for much longer than he should have. He looked around at somewhere he was familiar with but only loosely. He looked at the toys scattered on the lawn and smiled before it slipped and was replaced with sorrow. After taking a deep breath, he got out and walked to the door. He hesitated before his knuckles rapped on the door, then he waited.

  ~~~~~~~~~

-Y/N-

“CJ, please put this hoverboard away before I break my neck!”

 You wiped your hands on the dishtowel as you made your way to the front door. Your son was single-handedly working overtime to break every bone in his body. You’d heard that raising a boy would be difficult, but you were not prepared. He was a handful and a half, especially since he was the carbon copy of his father. Not only did he look just like him down to his blond hair, but he also had the same interests—skating, hoverboarding, biking, and soccer. Those were just the beginning of their similarities. With your head lost in thought, you didn’t see the fist-size fire truck that was lying in wait for you just in front of the door. You hopped and did your best football scrimmage to avoid the tragedy you foresaw.

 “Jesus Christ! Charles Matthew Hunnam, Junior!”

 You could hear the barrage of footsteps as he came running. He knew when you used his entire name; he was in trouble. As sure as the sky was blue, he came bounding around the corner with his blond curls bouncing and honey-chocolate sun kissed complexion on his way to you.

 “I’m sorry, mommy,” he sheepishly breeched as he bent to the floor to gather the death traps he’d left for you.

 “How many times have I told you to pick your toys up when you’re finished?”

 “I’m sorry, I forgot.” He looked so sad now and gave you those blue specked hazel eyes that were such an interesting mix of yours and Charlie’s that you were always a sucker for.

 Groaning, you shook your head affectionally. “Try to remember, honey,” you softly reminded. CJ nodded and threw his arms around your midsection. These were the things that made your day. The doorbell rang then, reminding you someone was there.  “Take them up, please.”

 “Okay, mommy.” You turned from him and continued your walk to the door. When you swung it open, you were shocked half to death to see Charlie standing on the other side.

 “Charlie,” you gasped out. Once CJ heard his name, you heard the clatter of the toys he must have just had heaped in his hands.

“Daddy!” You heard him running, and in seconds, he bound into Charlie’s waiting arms.

 “Ah! Hey, buddy!” Charlie stood and held onto CJ like he was his most favorite thing in the world; it was the same way CJ held onto him.

 You stood there and watched them half warmed by the sight of father and son and their evident love for each other and half seething that Charlie was there in the first place. He knew better than to show up unannounced. The only way this worked was if you had time to prepare yourself to see him. This was unexpected.

 “I missed you, daddy.”

 “I missed you too, CJ. Gosh, you look like you’re growing like a weed,” Charlie surmised, placing CJ back onto the ground.

 “I am, mommy says I’m half her height.”

 “Oh, is that right? So half her height means you’re still a ways behind me. I guess I better go back to eating my veggies,” Charlie joked. CJ found it funny, even if you didn’t.

 Clearing your throat, you brought the attention of your ex-husband to you. his smile faltered. “What’re you doing here, Charlie?”

 “I uh—I wanted to see CJ.”

 You dropped your head and sighed. This was going to turn into an argument.

 “I wanted to see you too, daddy. Can we do something? Can I show you my new bike? Then can we go down to the lake, and I can show you my new trick?”

 “Hold on there, bud. We gotta ask mommy,” Charlie said on a chuckle.

 “Can we mommy, please, please, please, please!” CJ was pouring on all the emotions and sweetness. You didn’t have the heart to say no.

 “Go ahead, have fun. Please, no broken bones!”

 “Thank you, mommy.” His hug was quick before he was grabbing hold of Charlie’s hand to yank him away. As he did, Charlie looked back to you with a melancholic smile, one you refused to read into.

 When you walked back inside, you were the one to pick up the toys you’d just told your son to pick up. You didn’t mind this time; you needed something to keep yourself busy. Picking up CJ’s toys turned into rearranging some of the things in the living room, and that turned into sweeping, then vacuuming and finally mopping. You could hear the jolly screams and laughs from inside the yard, and though it made you happy to hear how happy CJ was, it also filled you with a hint of sadness, one you’d worked hard to ignore.

 Every so often, you found yourself drifting to the windows to watch on as the two of them played. Every time you looked out, they were doing something different. Once it was tricks on BMX bikes, another time it was weird acrobatics like handstands and flips, and when you looked out once and saw them actually building mud monsters, you nearly lost your shit at how adorable they were together. That was when you stepped up the cleaning and began cleaning the kitchen.

 Once the cleaning was finished, you moved on to starting dinner. An hour passed then two, and you were in the thick of things. You’d only intended on cooking lasagna, but that turned into lasagna with sautéed broccoli, and garlic bread and dessert. It was apparent to you that you were anxiety cooking. Before you finished, though in they bounded downright filthy but over the moon.

 “Mommy, look!” CJ ran to you completely covered in a mixture of dried and wet mud with grass stains. He looked ready to throw his arms around you before you scurried behind the kitchen island.

 “Charles Matthew Hunnam, don’t you dare get me dirty.” His laughter was loud.

 “Fine, but look what we brought you.” He held out a bouquet of handpicked flowers of all varieties. A smile stretched across your face. You knew it was going to happen before it did.

 “You picked me flowers?”

 “Yup, it was daddy’s idea, then we had a competition who could pick the most. I won,” CJ happily boasted. The tears welling in your eyes could not be stopped from spilling.

 “Thank you, CJ, they are gorgeous. I love them almost as much as I love you.” CJ’s smile was just as wide, and your heart melted.

 “If you weren’t as filthy as a lost boy, I would hug you and kiss you, so if you want that hug and kiss, you better get showered.”

 “Okay, mommy.” CJ began to run away but stopped and came back to stand before Charlie. “Are you going to leave now?” His tone was low, and he looked like he was about to cry.

 “Uh—well, I hadn’t planned on staying this long.”

 “No! No, no, stay please, please, please. Mommy said she was going to make lasagna. It’s my favorite,” CJ rattled on.

 “Mine too,” Charlie admitted. You knew it.

 “Mommy, daddy loves your lasagna too; can he stay for dinner with us? Please, please, pleeeeeeease!”

 “CJ, I’m sure that your dad has things he has to do.”

 “No, he doesn’t, I asked outside he said he has nothing to do. Please, mommy, for meeeeee.” His whine was becoming incessant, sighing you accepted defeat.

 “Okay, only because I’d do anything for you.” CJ smiled widely again then hugged Charlie before he ran off, leaving the two of you standing there.

 “Uh—I can take shower duty, or have you transitioned him to alone ones?”

 “He’s all yours.” Charlie nodded and walked up the stairs where CJ just disappeared from.  

 Once alone, you looked at the flowers in your hands and ignored the flutter in your belly and the sight of one of your favorite wildflowers, dab smack in the middle of the bouquet, the one only Charlie knew about —poppies.

Nearly forty minutes later, dinner was underway, and it felt like old times, the times during your marriage before things went to shit. CJ talked about everything under the sun. He told Charlie all about his soccer schedule and who his friends were in school this month, he even told him all the gossip in his class. It was like he was making up for the last three weeks he hadn’t seen him. That made you sad, but you knew it was just how life was. Charlie was now a full-fledged movie star, and though his star rose years ago, it was still rising. Thanks to his insanely successful show, Sons of Anarchy, his name was a household one, and it came with thousands of thirsty groupies.

 Charlie laughed loudly as he threw his head back, clearly amused by one of CJ’s stories. He truly looked to be enjoying himself to the fullest. You’d long known that CJ was the best thing that had ever happened to Charlie. You’d spent long nights talking about just how much he loved that little boy and everything in you loved to hear him talk about how enamored he was with him. You knew that would never change, no matter what happened between the two of you.

 A little more than halfway through dinner Charlie’s eyes met yours, and it felt like forever ago that you’d looked into them. They looked different, sadder, more detached, and full of something that looked like pain. He looked different to you now than he had months ago. Maybe he was different, you thought.

 “Mommy, can I have dessert?”

 Snapping out of it, you smiled and nodded to your son. “Absolutely, a slice of pineapple upside-down cake coming right up.” You stood and walked into the kitchen to fix three plates of the dessert. When you came back, the two of them were doing thumb wars. Shaking your head, you put the plates down and tried not to think about how much different things could have been.

 The three of you ate your sweet treat and continued to emulate the perfect family. Once dessert was finished, Charlie was the one to initiate doing the dishes something you remembered he promised on your wedding day to do when he loved you the most to show you he cared and appreciated you. There was no way that was the reason now. While he did the dishes with CJ, you busied yourself with finding yet another thing to clean. It was a habit at this point.

 After the tidying was completed, you sat in front of the TV to watch an episode of CJ’s favorite cartoon, The Last Airbender. Through the entire episode, he and Charlie whispered and chatted about the episode then pretended to be from warning nations while they did their bending. It was then you faced how much you missed nights like this. It had been close to two years since the three of you spent time together like this. It was done on purpose. You didn’t think you could handle it. You had no idea how you were now.

 Before you knew it, the time had run away, and it was now almost ten. After telling CJ to get into bed, hit the bottle of your go-to liquor, hoping to find some form of strength to hold you up. Having Charlie there playing doting dad and husband as if he was no longer a part of your life hurt, it hurt a hell of a lot. You still had some animosity about the way things ended.

 When you made it upstairs, Charlie was sitting at the foot of CJ’s bed looking as if he were about to read him his bedtime story. “Oh, it’s cool. You guys go ahead,” you began.

 “Mommy, can you both read to me, like how you used to,” CJ pleaded. That was like a knife to the gut. You’d made CJ your top priority your whole like, and when you and Charlie began to have problems, his happiness was the only thing the two of you agreed on. You didn’t want him to feel as if he were missing anything, but right now, you saw he felt the void.

 “Of course, baby.” Walking around the bed to CJ’s pillow, you settled in your usual place and lifted your bare legs into the bed to cuddle beside your son. CJ dropped his head on your chest, where he knew he could listen to your heart. It was an action he’d always done ever since he was a little boy.

 You kissed the top of his head before you began. “Ready?” CJ nodded. Charlie held out the book to you, but you shook your head. “I’ve got it memorized. You keep it.”

 You took another breath, then began. “A mother bird sat on her egg. The egg jumped. Oh, oh! said the mother bird. “My baby will be here! He will want to eat. I must get something for my baby bird to eat! She said. I will be back! So away, she went.” CJ burrowed deeper into your side, making you smile. When you looked up, Charlie’s eyes were glued on the two of you. Nodding, you signaled for him to take over.

 Charlie cleared his throat and took a breath. “The egg jumped. It jumped and jumped and jumped! Out came the baby bird. Where is my mother, he said? He looked for her. He looked up; he did not see her. He looked down; he did not see her. I will go and look for her. So away, he went.” He read it without looking at the book. He just stared at CJ.

 With your turn, you read the next few pages, but you couldn’t keep your eyes off Charlie. He watched you as you watched him, and it was the most perfect thing. For the next ten or so minutes, you read the book to your son together. When he spoke, he never once looked down at the pages, never once broke the eye contact between you. The only time he glanced from your eyes was to look into his son’s. There were so many instances you had to stifle the flutter of your heart, and countless times, you found yourself looking over his hands and forearms. Even when he caught you, you didn’t seem to care. His voice coupled with how enamored he looked with CJ and vice versa and how rugged he looked, was wreaking havoc on you, especially when you remembered the miscarriage. Once you remembered that, a bitter taste filled your mouth, which brought you back to your reality.

 “All right, prince charming, that’s it,” you gently informed. CJ was still wide awake.

 “Aww. Does that mean you’re leaving now, daddy?” Charlie sighed, and it brought your attention to him. He looked equally as distraught as CJ did. The pit of your stomach knotted. This was never the fun part.

 “I’m afraid so, buddy.”

 “No. Stay, please. I don’t want you to go. I won’t see you for weeks. I miss you. Don’t you miss me? It’s like you don’t like being here with me or with us,” CJ rushed out. You could hear the pain in his voice, and it broke you in two. Looking at Charlie, you could see it was the same for him.

 “Of course, I miss you, buddy. I miss you more than I have the words to say. I always want to be with you, to be here, but you know that’s not our life anymore,” Charlie carefully explained.

 “Baby, it’s all right. Your dad loves you more than anything in this world,” you assured, hoping to smooth things over. It didn’t look like he believed one word you said.

 “Bud, I’ll be back tomorrow, I promise.”

 “I don’t believe you!” With that, the silence in the room was heavy. Charlie looked at his wit’s end with how to console him, and you knew what to do, but you didn’t think you had the strength. You could feel CJ’s tears, and that was the last straw.

 “Look at me, CJ.” Slowly he rose his head to you. you wiped his cheeks and kissed his forehead. “He’ll be here when you wake up.” It was a whisper because that was all you could muster.

 “What?” Charlie’s shock was evident. You looked at him and sighed.

 “You should stay. He needs this—he needs you.”

 Charlie searched your eyes before he spoke again. “Are you sure?”

 No, you weren’t sure. This was probably a bad idea for you, but for CJ, it was the best solution. Nodding your response, you looked back to CJ.

 “He can stay, mommy?” His smile was right back where it should be.

 “He can stay love, but you have to go to sleep.”

 Yayy!” CJ threw his arms around you to show his gratitude and excitement. You kissed him once more then stood.

 “Bed.” CJ kissed your jaw, then dropped back onto his bed and snuggled in his covers.

 “I’m going to stay; it’s been a while since I’ve watched him sleep,” Charlie whispered. Nodding, you walked out the door, leaving it slightly ajar.

 Again, you busied yourself preparing the guestroom, hoping the movement would distract you from not only thinking but worrying about the ramifications of your decision. This would be the first time in almost two years you’d slept under the same roof. Divorced meant over and done with. Of course, divorced with a child didn’t give a shit about over and done. He’d forever be in your life.

 The message you’d received from him a few days ago reminded you of just that. It was the most unexpected thing, the most heartbreaking message you’d gotten from him in a long time. It was so heartbreaking you had to lock yourself in the bathroom with the faucet and shower running to hide the sounds of your bawling from CJ. You ended up hiding in there for close to an hour, and even when you reemerged, you were emotionally unstable for the remainder of the evening. You were so emotionally unstable; there was no way you trusted yourself to respond, so you left it on read. What the fuck were you supposed to say to it anyway?

 After changing the sheets and straightening up a few things, you retreated to your bedroom for some quiet time, quiet time you desperately needed. You didn’t know how to get through the next twenty-four hours. You were struggling. Staring in the mirror, you objectively looked at yourself. You saw the truth, you always had. You just couldn’t afford to let that truth slip to the surface.

 The knock at the door had you leaping to your feet. When you opened it, there was Charlie, and your stomach liked what it saw.

 “Fast asleep?” He nodded and looked down at the floor.

 “I don’t have to stay in the house. I can sleep in my car,” Charlie suggested.

 “I’d do anything for you—for CJ.” The way he said it had your heart racing.

 “It’s fine. I have space. Come on.” You walked out of your bedroom and down the hall leading him to the guestroom you’d just prepped. When he walked into the room, you watched as he looked around.

“I just changed the sheets; they’d been on for weeks. It should be all good.”

 He turned to you, nodding his head. “Thank you, love dove.”

 The name hit you like a mack truck. You audibly “oofed” as you wrapped your arms around your midsection, instantly feeling the effect and the loneliness it brought on. He used to always call you that name, a day would never go by without him whispering it in your ear, against your neck, or your lips. You were brought back to happier times where you’d be locked in your room in bed, just ravaging each other, and he’d whisper it the entire time.

 Charlie must have been going through the same thing you were because he looked regretful before he spoke. “Sorry. Old habits.”

 Again, your stares lingered, and the air in the room was heavy and hot. It was like the last year or so didn’t happen, like he hadn’t broken your heart. He still had an effect.

 “Good night.” It was quickly said, and your exit was just as quick. You spent the next forty or so minutes in the shower. You hoped it would help to calm you down, but it didn't do that, it just gave you more anxiety.

 When you got out, you began to wonder if you’d placed towels in the room. When you saw them in your closet, you realized you’d brought them here mistakenly. Once you wrapped in your robe, you made your way to his room to drop them off. You knocked once, then twice, but neither knocks were answered. Deciding you could chance sneaking in to put the towels down, you opened the door. The sound of the shower running gave you your answer as to why he didn’t answer. Quickly you walked to the bed and put the stack of grey towels on the bed. As you neared it, out came Charlie in all his wet glory. In your shock, the towels fell to the floor and had your eyes snapping shut.

“Oh, god, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to intrude. I forgot to leave some towels. I knocked; you didn’t answer.”

 The room was silent; he didn’t speak. You wondered what he was doing. Was he trying to cover himself? Using your hands as your eyes, you felt for the towels you’d dropped. In seconds frustration filled you when you couldn’t find them. Opening your eyes for a second, you saw the towels, but when you looked only a centimeter up, there was his junk right in front of you. He hadn’t budged from his spot and hadn’t even made an attempt to cover himself.

 You meant to look away immediately, but that didn’t happen. He was maybe half a foot from you, close enough to touch. Charlie had always been the most attractive man that you’d seen. He’d always done it for you. With you on your knees before him, you realized that hadn’t changed. A son, a miscarriage, a messy ending to your marriage, and a divorce had done nothing to temper how much you always seemed to want him or be attracted to him.

 You were kneeling there in wide-eyed amazement. It had been years since you’d seen him like this. The deterioration of your marriage meant you spent lots of nights lonely and unloved. Before you gave him divorce papers, it had been seven whole months since you’d been intimate. When you added on the four months it took for the divorce to finalize and the year of being a divorcee, you hadn’t gotten laid in over two years. It was shameful because right now you knew why only he had an impact, only he would do.

 “It’s okay,” Charlie whispered. His voice was shaking, and he sounded hopelessly breathless. “It’s nothing you haven’t seen before in great detail.”

 Again, you remembered all the things you’d done to him in great detail over the six years of your marriage. Jumping to your feet, you tried your hardest to look away from his inviting appendage. You held out the stack of towels to him with your head turned to the side and waited for him to take them. When his hands grasped the items, they brushed yours and sent thousands of electric sparks through your hand and directly into your heart.

 Your eyes met again, and they lingered on each other. You hoped he couldn’t hear your heart, hoped he couldn’t tell what a fraud you were.

 “I should go,” you whispered.

 “You don’t have to.” His response awoke a need in you that you thought you’d buried. You knew what he was suggesting. Everything in you wanted to take the gentle suggestion and cross the room to him, but then what.

 Groaning, you peeled your eyes from his and turned. “Yes, I have to. Good night Charlie.” Those were the last words before you made your rapid exit.

 The following morning you awoke to the scent of food being prepared. When you looked at the clock, it was almost ten. Usually, you’d be up by eight. You’d slept in. Quickly you brushed your teeth and pulled on a pair of leggings then went downstairs. As you neared the kitchen, you could smell the evidence of what promised to be a delicious breakfast. You turned, and there was Charlie standing over the store in his tank cooking away. Good lord help you he’d buffed up even more, you thought. Times like these you wished things had been different. You missed mornings like this. Charlie looked up and smiled when he saw you. As you approached, his eyes roamed your body before his eyebrows knitted together.

 “What?”

 “Is that my hoodie?” You looked over yourself and realized your error. It was normal for you to sleep in his clothes, but you didn’t realize you still worse it.

 “Nope.” It was a lie but one he couldn’t fully prove.

 Charlie scoffed but didn’t speak again for a long time. You took the opportunity to bring up his impromptu visit.

 “You can’t just show up unannounced Charlie. That is not okay. You can see CJ whenever you want I have never kept the two of you apart but just showing up here—you can’t.”

 Charlie nodded and but kept his eyes down. “I know, I’m sorry. I just—I really missed CJ, and I had to see him, so see you. I couldn’t stay away. I wanted to talk.”

 What the hell were you supposed to say to that, you thought. Sensing your speechlessness, Charlie spoke. “I’m sorry about last night. I was out of line.”

 “Let’s not talk about it, CJ will be down any minute.”

 “I have to talk about it. I’m losing my mind. I’ve been losing it for the last near two years, and—I’m struggling,” Charlie admitted. His candor shook you. Half of you wanted to know more, but the other half was too scared.

 “Charlie, it’s fine. Let’s move on.”

 “I can’t. I can’t be like you. You have everything so put together. You’ve pieced this life together without me, and I can’t seem to piece any life together without you—without CJ.”

 It was then CJ came running down. It should have been sooner because you were absolutely ruined now.  You and Charlie stared at each other. He was daring you to speak, to acknowledge what he’d just dropped on you.

 “Daddy!” CJ jumped onto Charlie bringing his attention to your son. You took the reprieve to dip into the half bath to pull yourself together.

 You tried to wrap your head around what he’s said, tried to make sense of it. After five minutes, you still couldn’t come to terms with it, so you did the next best thing, pushed it aside. When you walked back out, CJ was sitting at the dining table, as was Charlie.

 “Ready to eat, mommy?”

 “Absolutely.” You sat at the table and dove into the food, all the while avoiding Charlie’s eyes. Through breakfast, he and CJ talked and joked with each other. It was a welcomed chatter because it took the attention off you.

 Once breakfast was finished, you cleaned the dishes while CJ got himself dressed for a playdate he’d been looking forward to the whole week. Now that Charlie was there, he refused to go. It wasn’t until Charlie promised he’d still be there when he got back did CJ agree. When the two of them came down, CJ was dressed and ready just in time for him to be picked up. You thanked Claudia for setting it up the playdate and waved goodbye to CJ from the front door.

 When you turned around, Charlie was leaning on the steps watching. You hesitated closing the door to enclose yourself in a confined space that had plenty of surfaces for him to bend you over. When you did, you quickly walked back to the kitchen.

 “We have to talk, Y/N.”

 “No, we don’t. There is nothing to talk about.”

 “Bullshit. After yesterday, last night, even in the kitchen this morning. We have plenty to talk about,” Charlie responded, following you through the house.

 “Charlie, don’t.”

 “I have to. Are you happy? Like really happy? It’s been a year. Are you happy? Is this what you wanted? Did you want our son feeling like a consolation in our relationship?”

 “Are you happy? You’ve gotten what you wanted.”

 “Me?! Y/N, you gave me divorce papers. You left our house and never came back,” Charlie shouted through clenched jaws.

 “Oh right, I’m the big bad wolf. You know how to fight for a role, but you have no clue how to fight for your marriage, your son. Classic.” You slammed the kitchen fridge unsure why you’d opened it in the first place.

 “Don’t pull that. I fought, I came to you over and over, begging you not to do it, pleading with you. You refused to listen.”

 “What did you come to me for Charlie? What the hell did you prove to me? What did you show me? What was I going back for? The same bullshit? The same treatment?! In all the times you came begging and pleading, you never once showed me how things would change. You just didn’t want a divorce under your belt. You didn’t want the press to get wind of it.”

 “That’s bullshit! I wanted my wife; I wanted my son! You didn’t want me. When did you stop loving me, Y/N?”

 You looked at him incredulously. He had to be fucking kidding, you thought. Your anger was rising by leaps and bounds, and you knew the next words out your mouth were going to be venom. “Is the weight of it all too heavy now, Charlie? A year later, a year after you switched up and changed? A year after you showed me time and time and again what was important, who was important. You showed me I didn’t mean shit; CJ didn’t mean shit. I was not going to stay and turn into those Hollywood couples who hated each other and only remained for the spotlight. No!”

 “You gave up on me,” Charlie whispered.

 “Fuck you! You gave up. You gave up on me and us long before I left you those divorce papers. You did.” You walked away because you could feel your tears spilling over, but you turned around back to him, tired of hiding the fallout of his actions. “You know what makes all of this so much worse? My friends told me this would happen. They told me before we got married, told me to slow down, be careful with you, and I defended you. I defended you till kingdom come. Look where we are, Charlie! Living in a perfect lie!”

 “I don’t want to live this lie. I miss you, Y/N. I miss CJ. I miss our life; I miss our family. I’m miserable,” Charlie dropped.

 His tears ran down his cheeks, and you flared your nose. This was always your weakness. Charlie had always been in touch with his emotions, but his emotions had to be overwhelming for him to cry.

 “Good. You sowed this Charlie. You brought all of this on. My baby--,” you began, but the pain was too much. Charlie sobbed and dropped his head back.

 “I’m sorry,” he said as he approached you. You steadily backed away from him, not wanting him to touch you.

 “Y/N,” Charlie began as you shook your head.

 “No. I’m not doing this with you. I refuse.”

 Charlie quickly caught you before you turned and kept you facing him. “You can’t run from this Y/N. Face it with me, please.”

 You kept a straight face, refusing to cry any more. You refused to allow him any closer than he already was. You wouldn’t survive it this time. Charlie grunted out in frustration when he realized you were hell-bent on keeping him at bay.

 “Y/N!”

 “What do you want from me, Charlie?” You shot death rays right at him.

 “I want you to say anything! Scream! Yell at me! Just something to show you fucking care.”

 “Why should I care? Why the hell should I give one flying fuck?”

 “Because I’m still in love with you!”

 The words felt like a slap in the face. You’d imagined how they’d sound coming from him during the whole divorce process, during the whole year after the divorce. You were convinced he didn’t love you anymore for him to have treated you the way he did, for him to have done what he did in Cannes. The stress of it brought on your miscarriage.

 Though you’d wanted to hear them, you hadn’t prepared to hear them.

 “I love you. God, I can't keep pretending like I'm okay with any of this. I can’t pretend that it doesn’t kill me to be away from you, to be away from CJ. I can’t act like I’m thriving or happy. I’m not. I’m miserable. I wish I could press rewind and go back and better, do better. I wish I knew better then, as I know now. I fucked up, and I regret it more than I’ve ever regretted anything in my life. If I had been a better man, none of this would have happened. If I’d only been the man you deserved our baby—our princess would be here right now. I will have to live with that for the rest of my life, the pain that I caused your miscarriage, the pain that I broke our vows, that I broke your heart, I broke us.”

 Charlie dropped his forehead to your collar, and his tears dropped across your chest. They felt like acid peeling away every barrier you’d built between him and your heart. He was saying everything you want him to, everything. He wasn’t holding anything back. They were words you’d desperately wanted to hear.

 “I’m sorry, love dove. I never wanted to give up on you--on us. I loved you so much. You were my world until CJ. Then you became my universe. I lost myself. I lost sight of you and me. I lost sight of the man I was and wanted to be. For that, I will always be sorry. Losing you and CJ, it broke me. I stand here a broken man. I had to find me again. It’s been hard, but the root of me is you and my son. My family. You have always been what mattered, and I regret I ever lost that, that I ever made you feel like you weren’t my everything.”

 One lone tear rolled down your cheek, and that was just the beginning. When Charlie swiped it away with the pad of his thumb, the flood gates opened. You bawled uncontrollably, all your emotions finally catching up to you. Charlie wept with you, and that was how the two of you stayed for countless minutes.

 When you opened your eyes and realized how close he was, you sniffled. Slowly the two of you inched to one another. Before your lips touched, both of you hesitated. “Fall back in love with me, love dove.” He whispered.

 He really thought you’d ever fallen out of love with him. “You’re an idiot if you think I’ve ever fallen out of love with you.” The hope you saw in Charlie’s eyes set your belly fluttering. It was overwhelming. Charlie claimed your lips in a soft but passionate kiss that took your breath away. It was so intense you felt as if you’d been possessed by sheer desire. The kiss began timid and soft, but in seconds, it had turned into a lustful and sensual soul transference. Charlie’s hands gripped your hips and pulled you flush against him before he lifted you in his arms.

 Wrapping your legs around him, you kissed him back with as much heat as you kissed you. Soon the two of you were walking through the house blindly looking for anywhere. Charlie plopped you onto something, and the backs of your knees said it was the kitchen island. Quickly both of you stripped each other. He pulled off his hoodie from your body as you peel his shirt off. Charlie cupped your breasts when he realized you weren’t wearing a bra then dipped his mouth to your mounds. Instantly you moaned and hugged his head to your flesh.

 Charlie nipped and hypnotizingly sucked your skin, bringing you more and more ecstasy. It had been so long since you’d felt like this; you didn’t want to think about anything else but the sensations. Charlie pushed you back onto the island and brought his lips down your stomach to your hip. Once there, he pulled off your leggings in one fluid motion. His beard tickled your skin and had you wriggling underneath him. Charlie’s groan was loud when he realized you wore nothing under those leggings.

 In seconds he’d draped your legs over his shoulder and reclaimed claimed ownership of the most intimate part of you. He moaned as he lapped at your wetness and teased and pleased your body. You bucked your hips against his lips, feeling your orgasm barrel toward you. Everything in you said it was going to be a catastrophic one. You panted and gasped his name as your body wildly thrashed, unable to control it any longer.

 “Aah, yes, right there. Yes, Charlie, yes, yes!”

 Your scream was loud, and the tightness of your legs around his head was enough to suffocate. Charlie didn’t panic. Instead, he lifted your lower half into the air and continued his feast, not caring if you were overstimulated or not. Your screech echoed off the walls of the kitchen, and you tried to pry him away from your sex. He refused to budge even when you’d unwrapped your legs the best you could. Yet another orgasm ripped through you, sending a gush of moisture all over his mouth and beard. Charlie groaned, gripped your breasts, and squeezed hard enough for you to know just how tightly wound he was.

 When he pried your legs from around him, you felt the renewed fire and quickly slid off the island to drop before him. You hurriedly stripped him eager to have him. Once he was free, his heavy cock bobbed in front of you. Wasting no more time, you slid him into your mouth, ignoring your gag and took every inch he was blessed with. Charlie shouted and hugged your head to his cock, keeping him lodged tightly in your throat. Sensing the low levels of your air supply, he pulled back enough to give you a brief reprieve. It was all you needed and more than you wanted.

 Slamming him back into your mouth, you lodged him in your throat again, all the while moaning enthusiastically. Charlie’s hands never left your head just as his mouth never closed. Moan after moan fell from him as you sucked and slurped his length. In no time at all, Charlie was thrusting into your mouth hell-bent on finding his long-overdue release. Just as you were finding a groove, Charlie pulled from your mouth with a loud “pop” before he pulled you up and pushed you onto the island.

 With you bent over the island and your ass poked out for him, Charlie rubbed his cock across your soaking folds sending shivers through you. He bent to your ear and kissed you.

 “I love you, only you. Endlessly for eternity.” It was the same thing he’d said the night of your wedding before he joined you for the first time as husband and wife. When you peeped behind you and locked eyes with him, you knew the two of you had an understanding. Charlie kissed your back then snapped his hips forward, harshly, and completely filling you to the hilt. You shouted and gripped the island. Your knees bucked from the sheer pleasure of just this. When you clenched around him, Charlie, have you just what you wanted—a rough tryst.

 Every slam into your core had you clenching around him. Each thrust was more bruising than the last, and each one brought tears to your eyes. They weren’t hurt tears; they were a mixture of relief and complete joy. You shouted his name over and over, not caring how needy or desperate you sounded. You could feel how on edge he was; his body shook every time he filled you, and every time you said his name, he shouted yours.

 When Charlie began jackhammering into you clearly lost in his pleasure, you left planet Earth. Only he could have you like this. Only he could fuck you into outer space. You knew he was close, and the second he whimpered behind you, you pressed back into him, throwing your ass back onto him. Charlie sucked in a breath, and his whimpers intensified. The slap to your ass was the last thing you needed to be pushed over the edge, an edge you dragged him over. Charlie grunted and groaned as he filled you with every ounce of his love.

 It took several long moments for the two of you to come down from your sultry sex bubble. After having you across the island, you rode him until his toes curled, and he saw stars on the kitchen floor leaned against the same island. By the time you’d both stopped, hours had passed. Neither of you were fully satiated. As Charlie hugged you to him still buried deep within you, he tipped your chin so you were looming at him.

 “Marry me again.” Shocked, you searched his face for his meaning.

 “You’re not serious.”

 “I am. Will you be my wife again?” the gleam of silver caught your eye, and you looked down to see him wearing your engagement and wedding ring on a chain around his neck. Your world shattered. He’d worn them this entire time. Locking eyes with him again, you knew he could tell you realized what he was wearing.

 “All this time?” Charlie held up his hand to show you the silver wedding band he still wore.

 “I promised forever; I wasn’t done with it.” Your tears fell, and so many emotions filled you; you had no idea which one to go with.

 “I have to do whatever it takes to stop my heart from being broken, Charlie,” you whispered.

 “I’ll never break your heart again. I know how it ends. I know what it means. I can’t risk my life without you or CJ anymore. I can’t.” His tears welled, and you believed him.

 “Surrender to me, love dove. Surrender to me as I can only surrender to you.” His voice was pleading with you. Closing your eyes, you listened to your soul, the place where no fear lived. When you looked at him, you trailed your thumb across his bottom lip.

 “Give them back.” Charlie looked confused for a few seconds before he got it. Quickly he yanked the chain from around his neck and slid the rings off to hover them over your finger before he locked eyes with you.

 “Never again will we be here. Never again will I lose us,” Charlie forcefully vowed.

 “Never again will I walk away,” you responded. He looked overwhelmingly emotional then, but you could see him holding as much of it back as possible. When he slid the rings onto your finger, both of you sighed as if you both felt instant relief.

 You knew this was a new beginning for the two of you but also for CJ. You knew that neither of you would ever again make the same mistakes.

 “I surrender,” you both whispered together.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hello There! If it wouldn't be too late to ask for a fic (please feel free to ignore if so), may I please possibly request #61 and #69 for Lokius? I would truly appreciate it!

Anon, I am SO SORRY that it took me too long to answer you. I wanted to watch the last episode before jumping into ideas for the prompt you gave me and honestly, I'm glad that I did. It was nice to write again for these two and I feel like I know them a little bit more now - however, excuse me if any of them sound a little bit out of character and please warn me if I do so. I'm always trying to improve haha Anyway! You asked for: love confessions + flirting under fire. I didn't knew what flirting under fire was - at least, not with a NAME to it and it's one of my favourite tropes. It reminded me of that Pirates of the Caribbean scene with William and Elizabeth and it was such a nice memory. I took the liberty of creating some back story for Mobius and throwing some prophecies for the end of the show. Oh, btw, I am always taking requests (not only for Lokius, Winterbaron or Marvel pairings), so feel free to message me whatever idea you have! <3 I hope you like it! As usual, the story is available under "read more" and on ao3 as well! Reblogs and comments are more than welcome! <3 Warnings: Spoilers for episode 3.

"This place is going to explode in a few minutes, come on," Sylvie's voice was urgent as the trio made their way through the halls of the TVA in a hurry. Loki's left arm rested on Mobius' shoulders as the god walked with some difficulty, practically being dragged by the ex-agent through the halls to the exit of the institution, where they would use a temp-pad to escape.

Los Angeles, California, 1996.

The location and time had been handpicked by Loki after stealing one of the TVA files contained in a specific folder. The folder about the recruitment of Mobius M. Mobius. As far as he had read, Mobius used to work in a local marina, organizing the rental of spaces and, mainly, Jet Skis. The irony of it made him laugh - even though it was a powerful group, the TVA had not been able to erase some of the most intrinsic things about Mobius the mortal, the Midgardian: his passion for his work and for water sports, even if the ex-agent did not know where it came from. Loki allowed himself a few sentimental moments while reading the files, before Sylvie took them from his hands and offered, "so, are we going to save your Prince Charming or not?"

The Asgardian could not even consider the possibility of not accepting that offer.

It didn't take long before they were inside the TVA again.Sylvie had been busy fighting the plan, while Loki had searched the rooms for Mobius. It was not an easy reunion - the agent still held grudges over Loki's supposed betrayal of his trust, and even though he had explanations, the Asgardian knew he deserved some of that treatment. "I promise it will all make sense later but please come with me," he begged - and to the surprise of both Mobius and Loki, the mortal followed him without question.

And there the three of them were, running away from the remaining TVA guards, following the plan of the one who, until recently, was the main reason for the union between god and mortal, variant and variant.

They were a few feet from the temp-pad when one of the guards' bullets hit Loki's other shoulder - not enough to endanger the other's life, but enough to slow his steps, which were not remotely as fast as they needed them to be. "You two, run to the temp-pad, I'll slow them down. Don't leave without me!" uttered Sylvie to both of them, and nodding, Mobius dragged Loki to the temp-pad on a rock, resting the brunette there as he fiddled with the settings.

"Mobius...," mumbled Loki. They hadn't had time to talk, and even though he didn't want to have that conversation there, in imminent danger of one of the two of them getting hit and to the sounds of Sylvie's screams in the background, he needed to talk. Now. “Not now, Loki”, said Mobius, without looking at the others' faces. Underneath the frown, Loki knew he was scared - the whole situation was a little scary for himself and, in a way, he was living it twice - as Loki and as Sylvie. He could feel her fear and, in some ways, he knew that he was experiencing the same fear. The thought that coming back to the main timeline could end his or hers existence had crossed their minds a few times and they both had talked about that - she was willing to sacrifice herself after her job was done. He wasn’t, but he would do that to keep her alive as long as she promised that she would look after Mobius and try to find Thor. Sylvie had promised she would do her best but, in the end, none of them knew what could happen when they cross the timelines. The irony of it all would make him laugh if it were an Asgardian party tale and not something he was actually experiencing - something that could cause him a real loss in his life.

The agent, for his part, was... being liberated. What was he so terrified of? That didn’t made sense but he could feel the fear both in the air and in his eyes. "Mobius, pay attention to me. Don't change the date on the temp-pad. I... looked at your files. We'll get you back to your life before all this, before... the TVA declared you a variant and imprisoned you here," Loki explained, finally drawing Mobius' attention to himself, who was staring at him visibly confused and alarmed by the offer being made. As if he was insulted by what Loki had said. "Loki, what makes you think I would ever want to go back to my previous life? I've seen too much, I'm not the same person as before. The 90's may have been a few years ago but I don't know how to be who I used to be," Mobius was direct - he was looking at Loki intently, hoping that his eyes would make sure of how serious he was being about this.

He hoped, too, that Loki could tell between the lines of what he was saying that he didn't want to be separated from him again. And a significant part of the agent hoped that the feeling was reciprocated by the other man in front of him. The black-haired one, on the other hand, was watching Mobius with visible confusion, not understanding how he could deny himself the possibility of coming back to the life that was stolen from him. However, soon he could understand why and a little smile appeared on his lips.

Allowing himself one last impulsive act, Loki leaned his body on the rock at his back and brought both hands to Mobius' face, sealing their lips in a delicate, yet urgent kiss - a kiss that reflected the peculiar mixture that was the impulsiveness of his act in the midst of how much he had wanted to do it for so long, even though a significant part of that time had been spent denying himself that desire. He felt the reciprocation on Mobius' part - as hesitant and as intense as his own, in a contradiction that completed itself. If it weren't for the occasion and the moment they were living, Loki would have appreciated how "a contradiction that completed itself" seemed to explain the whole trajectory of the two of them up to that point.

Something inside him, however, told him that that would not be the last time he would have Mobius' lips against his own.

"Hey, could you two hurry up there?" shouted Sylvie, approaching the two of them with urgency, interrupting their moment without any hesitation. Loki held on to Mobius, seeking support, and held on to Sylvie, trying to keep her close to him while she manipulated the temp-pad.

Whatever happened when the three of them returned to the main timeline would be up to fate - as long as he was with those who had become his true north, he would be fine.

87. you’re a P.I. my parents hired to investigate my fiancee and you completely ruined my engagement party with the dirt you found but I want to know all the details right now

Sternclay, sfw or nsfw, please!

Here you go! I went NSFW and set it in the same universe as this Indruck fill. The orc designs are once again inspired by @kriskukko, whose art everyone should check out

The air is grey and chilly, and his best coat is still a bit too plain for this affair, but Barclay can’t help but glow. His husband to be is using this engagement party to invite him into parts of society he’s only glimpsed from behind kitchen counters or through windows on his way home in the early hours of the morning.

He didn’t even have to cook the table of delicacies and warm punches, which is usually his entry fee into any social space not hosted by Mama or his other friends back at Amnesty Lodge.

“Are you alright my dear?” William touches his shoulder. He’s the height of fashion from the new stud in his nose to the cut of his suit. Barclay looks at their linked hands, marveling at how his tattoos and calluses contrast with the smooth, unmarked green of Williams' skin. It’s wonderful to know he can be part of such an unlikely match.

“I’m fine. I just wish Mama and them could be here too.”

“Barclay, I know you care for them, but they agreed with me that this is not a party they’d feel comfortable attending.”

If memory serves, Mama’s word choice was “enjoy” not “comfortable” but he’s distracted from this detail by the orc currently in a hushed conversation with William’s parents. His accent is American, the same as Barclay’s. He knows William has no friends or family on the other side of the Atlantic, and he’s too well-dressed to be an attendant. When William’s parents fervently shake their heads, the newcomer turns and strides across the floor, right to the happy couple.

“Mr. Cobb” he offers Barclay a slight bow, shows no deference to William, “My name is Joseph Stern. I’m a private detective hired by your fiance’s family. They hoped I would find reason for him not to marry you. I have.”

“I, I don’t understand. I haven’t done anything wrong.”

“No, you haven’t. The reason I suggest calling off the wedding is that he” Stern indicates William, “is not the least bit interested in you. He chose you because he knew his parents would disapprove of the match, which would in turn make it easier for him to call off the engagement two months from now and, three months after that, propose to his lifelong friend, Albert Rothby.”

Gasps and whispers fill the room. Barclay looks to William for reassurance but can’t find any; William’s too busy trading alarmed glances with Albert.

Stern continues, “His parents would be all too happy to accept the orc they once rejected for being from a slightly less well-off family after the shock and scandal of him almost marrying a nobody cook.”

“Hey!”

“His words, not mine.” The detective turns to the hosts, “You don’t need to pay me for my time, since I didn’t give you what you wanted. Good afternoon.”

A thoroughly baffled servant hands him his coat and hat as he exits, the room overflowing with chaotic accusations behind him. William doesn’t say two words to Barclay, choosing instead to shout at his parents. Barclay pulls off his silver engagement band, shoves it into his now ex-fiance’s hand, and storms out of the room.

He intends to make straight for the train station, hide his tears and humiliation until he’s safe under Amnesty’s worn shingles. But when he spies Stern on the corner handing coins to an errand boy, his foolish hope gets the better of him.

“How do you know?”

“Excuse me?”

“How do you know that’s really what William planned?”

Stern hails a cab, motions for Barclay to join him inside it. When they’re seated, he reaches into his coat and removes a bound stack of letters.

“Albert’s arrogant and sloppy; all it took was five pounds to get one of the maids to fish these out of his wastebasket.” He passes the notes to Barclay.

Each one he skims is like slicing his finger with a meat cleaver. Not a single piece of his personality or appearance remains unmocked by the time he’s done.

“I was just a game to him.” He stares at William’s signature, the same one that dots a pile of letters he’ll burn when he gets home. When he looks up, Stern’s face is full of sympathy.

“I considered not saying anything. That even if the engagement ended, you might be able to tell yourself it was a true love that wasn’t meant to be. But the longer I trailed you...I saw that you deserved better than being a pawn in someone else's trivial chess game. I offered his parent’s the chance for me to have the conversation in private; they doubled down on their insistence that you must be secretly awful to have lured their dear son to you. Ruining their party seemed fair.”

“I guess.” Barclay’s lip trembles. What was it William wrote? That he was as tender and devoted as a lapdog and twice as fun to kick around?

Stern produces a monogrammed handkerchief from his pocket, holds it out to him, “I’m sorry. I know ignorance is bliss but, um, wasting your heart on someone like him strikes me as hellish.”

Barclay wipes his eyes, but the tears insist on flowing, “No you’re, you’re right, it just, I, I really thought he loved me.” He lets out a bitter laugh, “I really am more brawn than brain, just like he said.”

“No, you’re not.” The cab slows, and Joseph’s blue eyes pin the pieces of his crumbling heart together, “and even if you were every single thing he said you were in those letters, that wouldn’t justify his treatment of you. You’re a good man, Barclay” he smiles for the first time, “someone will treat you how you deserve one of these days.”

The driver announces they’ve arrived at Barclays hotel. He glances at Stern, surprised.

He opens the door for Barclay with a wink, “detective.”

-------------------------------------------------------------

Fall arrived on the first of September, meaning the business at Amnesty dwindles right along with leaves. They won’t see another flood of visitors until the winter holidays, when everyone travels up and down the country to meet with family. Barclay fills his days with work and tries not to think about how happy he was a year ago.

Dani has a cold, so he’s working the lobby counter until it’s time for him to start dinner. A chill and burst of nickel-tinted light announce a guest. When the orc approaches him, he drops his pen.

“Hello, Barclay. It’s nice to see you under happier circumstances.” Stern removes his hat, runs his fingers through his black hair, “would it be possible to rent a room here indefinitely? I’m on a case and I have no idea how long it’ll take.”

“Yeah, of course.” He pulls out the register to check which rooms are open, which would be easier if his eyes didn’t insist on flicking back to the orc in front of him. He’d noticed Stern was handsome before, in the same way he noticed the sky is blue or a piece of fruit was ripe. Now it’s all he sees; the cut of his clothes suggesting a trim, capable figure beneath, his clean shaveness showing off the angles of his jaw and cheeks. His tusks are the same size and not chipped like Barclays own. The cook wants Stern to sink them into his skin and not let up until he sobs for a kiss instead.

“Uh, here” he retrieves a key, “I can put you in number twelve. It’s upstairs, last door if you take a left.

“Great!” Stern takes the key, lifts his two bags, “thank you for accommodating me.” His gaze slows as it moves up to Barclays face, “I think I’m going to enjoy my stay.”

---------------------------------

Joseph hates the days where he has to wait for telegrams before proceeding with his investigation. It makes him feel like a dog gnawing its tail out of boredom. At least, it used to. Now that he’s at Amnesty, he’s never bored. It’s hard to be when the best looking orc he’s ever seen likes to talk with him while cleaning tables or making breakfast.

William Ashby is a fool. Joseph knew this when he watched him forgo a kind, interesting orc who was built like a god and had eminently kissable lips for the sake of some uninteresting upper class nobody. But now that he’s eating Barclays’ cooking every day, the opinion is twice as strong. No one should be able to make potatoes a divine experience, but his friend manages.

“No running around stuffy offices or abandoned houses today?” Barclay sits down across from him.

“Not until I get a telegram from that solicitor in London. Black or white?”

“White. Well, that’s good news for me, I get a chance to beat you.” He’s smiling, the firelight dancing in his eyes and off the copper in his beard. Joseph wishes he could mimic the light's path with his hands.

Instead, he grins as he lays out the chess pieces, “In your dreams.”

An hour and a half later, Barclay whoops, “checkmate” and Joseph falls even more in love.

-----------------------------------

“Barclay? Since it’s not raining I thought you might like to…” Joseph falls silent at the sight of Barclay sitting on his bed, facing the window with a defeated set to his shoulders.

“Sure, as long as we’re back before dark.” He shrugs and doesn’t so much as look over his shoulder.

“What’s wrong?” Joseph settles beside him, notices the handkerchief with his initials on it clutched between his hands. The tears on it are fresh.

“Nothing. Just, uh, just….this is the anniversary of when he proposed. Of when I thought someone loved me that way, of when I thought that, that...fuck, it’s gonna sound so silly.”

“You don’t have to say it but I, um, I hope you know I won’t judge you for whatever it is.”

Barclay twists the fabric, “I love my life here at Amnesty. I love Mama, all my friends, I love being a cook. But I’ve never been wealthy; Mama and I faced lots of hard times before coming here, especially when my folks died and she took me in. The Lodge does well but there’s always the fear that one day it won’t. I can be happy without fancy food or nice clothes or nights out but, uh,” he clears his throat, “that doesn’t mean I didn’t really like having them. I don’t miss him so much as I miss this feeling of being able to want without worry. Of, of thinking I’d get to do that forever.”

He lists to the side, rests his head on Joseph’s shoulder. He’s both taller and broader than Joseph, which adds to his charms, but right now the detective wishes he was smaller so he could gather him in his arms and protect him from the disappointing world. Give him what he’s missing.

An idea buzzes to the front of his mind. He rubs Barclays shoulder soothingly, “You have to go into London for some orders, right?”

“Uh huh.”

“I have to go in to deal with this case and check to make sure nothing urgent is waiting at my office. Do you want to go together?”

Barclay looks up at him, brown eyes glittering like precious metal, “I’d love to.”

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Barclay knows Joseph has wealthy clients; he’s starting to suspect he has even more of them than he lets on. They’re in London for two days, and every moment not spent sleeping or working is filled by Joseph taking Barclay somewhere. The meals are by far his favorite, but Joseph bought them tickets to the opera their second night. When Barclay worried he wouldn’t be well dressed enough, Joseph decided they could both do with new clothes and bought everything without blinking at the bill.

Now, Barclay is in a private box, belly full from their stop at Simpson’s and Joseph’s shoulder resting against his own. The music is beautiful, the staging intriguing, but he’s struggling to keep his eyes open, too warm and comfortable from the company and the darkness.

The port they had after dinner probably isn’t helping.

He rests his head back, let’s his eyes flutter closed. After a moment Joseph laughs softly and whispers, “A bit too full from dinner?”

“Mmmhmmm.”

“That’s okay. The whole point of tonight is for you to enjoy yourself. If that means happily lazing like a dog by a fire, that’s what you should do.”

Barclay tenses for a second, then relaxes. It’s not like when William kept referring to him as a dog; in Joseph’s voice it’s fond, like a master who knows he indulges his hound but doesn’t care.

“That’s me. Just a spoiled pet.” He murmurs.

Short claws trace across his upper thigh, “As it should be.”

His eyes flutter open; Joseph watches him in the dark, expression attentive and possessive. His fingers don’t move even a centimeter until Barclay nods. Then they finish curving over his thigh to stroke his cock through his pants.

No one can see them, but even so his eyes dart side to side before shutting once more.

“Good boy” Joseph sighs, “sweet boy.”

Barclay nods, squirms as the touches stay teasing.

“Don’t rush. We have a whole other act to go. Just keep quiet; you’re a big, sweet beast, I’d hate to have to” he presses his palm down, “discipline you.”

He bites his tongue to keep from groaning; when they’re back at the lodge, he’s going to misbehave so much.

Joseph keeps up his steady, calculated teasing, Barclay never moving past half-hard. He falls into an almost sleep-like state, feeling weightless and far away from himself yet completely safe in Joseph’s care.

Then swift fingers undo his trousers and a handkerchief wraps around his cock. He throws a palm over his mouth as Joseph jerks his hand up and down.

“It’s almost over.” The detective murmurs, chuckles when Barclay crumples to hide his face in his neck, “that’s it, be a good boy and---oh, oh good lord.” He stifles a sigh in Barclays hair while Barclay cums into the cloth, saturating it embarrassingly fast. William once compared him, unfavorably, to a centaur in that regard. Joseph simply kisses his forehead and tidies him up. By the time they exit, the only sign of their dalliance is Barclays wobbly legs.

He fully intends to return the favor, but sex-drunkeness and general exhaustion drag him to sleep before Joseph is even in bed.

Their morning is a brisk packing up of things followed by a trip to the train station. Once they’re in their cabin, Joseph looks over the notes he made during his research.

“I just can’t shake the feeling Mr. Newton is in danger.”

“Giant cursed hound will do that.”

“I’m not so sure that’s it. I’m not ruling out the supernatural, but there are elements of this that feel distinctly orcish and very much alive in their threat. I’m glad he brought that friend of his with him; were he in Beacon House alone, he could be in serious trouble.” He closes his small notebook.

“I still can’t tell if he’s more than a friend.”

“They might not know. The few times I’ve run into Mr. Newton or Mr.Cold, they seem to be in stalemate, neither willing to make a move.”

“Good thing you don’t have that problem.” Barclay winks, then realizes he might be reading the other orc wrong, “I, uh, I mean, not that last night has to mean anything.”

Joseph unbuttons his coat, “I, um, I hoped it might.”

“Thankfuck.” Barclay slumps back, “me too.”

There’s a click of the lock, then Joseph stands and begins undoing his pants, “speaking of which, it seems to me a good boy would reward me for last night.”

“Yes, oh fuck yes.” He scrambles to get his cock out, stroking it frantically as Joseph rolls up his sleeves.

“You’re so eager to please, it makes me want to give you everything you ask for.”

“Please?”

Joseph, now bare from the waist down, bends to kiss him, “Please what?”

“Please let me fuck you, let me mppph!” His moan slips straight down Joseph’s throat as he sinks onto Barclays cock.

“Ohhhhhyes, ohmylord” the tips of his ears twitch as he rocks his hips, “you feel so good”

“Y-you’re one to talk, fuck, Joseph can I touch you?”

“Anywhere you waAAnt” he tips his head back, whisper threatening to break as Barclay drops a thumb down to rub his cock. He sets his hands on Barclay’s shoulders, “we, we don’t have much time, and I do need to review more of the case before we arrive, so be a good boy and let me ride you hard and fast?”

“Yes, yesfuck, ohyeah” A laugh catches on his tongue as Joseph, his dignified, debonair detective, sets to bouncing up and down on his cock with the kind of abandon he only witnessed when he used to serve drinks in a brothel.

Joseph grins, kisses him messily as their grunts meld with the rumble of the train. Barclay glides his free hand around to grope and paw his ass, savoring how it tightens with the effort of riding, of taking Barclay again and again. Curious, he gives it a light slap, wishing he could see a little pink bloom on the green there.

“Careful, sweet boy; if anyone’s ass is getting bruised it’s yours.”

“Tonight?” He smiles hopefully at Joseph’s flushed face.

“Yes, Barclay tonight. Tonight I’ll, ohlord, strip you down, let you rut on the bed like the needy beast you are while I turn your ass tender and red before fucking it, oh, ohshit, Barclay.” He smashes their lips together as he cums, Barclay whining with pleasure at the fact that he got him there. The detective doesn’t break the kiss as he pulls off, simply uses his strong legs to keep straddling him as he jerks Barclay off with one hand and rucks his own shirt up with the other. Barclay moans helplessly as he cums in large, white droplets all up his stomach and chest.

“You’re wonderful.” Joseph kisses his cheek.

“So are you.” Barclay holds him close, giggles adoringly when Joseph starts concocting theories while half-naked and cuddled in his lap. By the time they reach home, there’s no sign of their dalliance.

Except for their linked hands and matching smiles.

Island dreams

Ok, I had a moment of inspiration and i started planning a long fic... a Rowaelin Modern AU... set in Scotland. I am from Scotland so I am biased and also i love, adore the Outer Hebrides which is the location of the fic. They are amazing, incredible islands on the west of Scotland that stole my heart a few years ago.

Also, in my head in Modern AU Rowan is Scottish. There is nothing that will change my mind to do that.

Anyway... I haven’t written a long in a very long time and it’s a terrifying idea. but it just popped in my head and I had a feeling that I had to write it.

On the islands Gaelic is stilll spoken and I will use it from time to time in the fic. I hope it’s grammatically correct. It’s been year since I studied it and I am rusty. I will add a translation.

So here’s the story

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Aelin is a successful doctor in London but her life in the last year has started to take an unhappy turn and she feels overwhelmed. So one day she decides to take a break from her life, book a plane to Scotland and head off to the islands in search of peace and herself as well.

Rowan has a bookstore in Stornoway, the main town in the Isle of Lewis.

Aelin is a bookworm and her first mission once in Stornoway is to find a bookstore.

Have fun reading it....

Chapter 1

Aelin was on the deck of the ferry. The frigid wind was savage against her cheeks. She tugged closer her jacket and a shiver ran down her spine. She was freezing but she had no intentions to get back inside the ferry. She had left Ullapool early that morning on her way to Stornoway on the isle of Lewis.

She needed a getaway. An escape from the busy life in London and from the bad turn her life had taken. 

Without thinking, she went to grab the ring that was at her fourth finger on her left hand to then quickly realise it was not there anymore. And then remembered the reason why the band was missing. The nasty divorce she just had to go through was another reason, if not the main one, for the fact the she had now been on a ferry for almost two hours and a half.

The landscape had been breathtaking, other reason for why she was braving the cold. Once departed Ullapool, all around her there were mountains and the raw wilderness of the landscape tugged at something hidden in her. She was born and bred in London and skyscrapers, traffic and noise was all she knew. She realised she craved this: the stillness, the peace, the silence, nature.

In front of her the sea stretched peacefully and she was glad the sailing had been smooth that day. It seemed like the west of Scotland was welcoming her with a beautiful sunny day, apparently something quite unusual according to some of the people she heard speaking. The Minch, that was the name of the stretch of sea that separated mainland Scotland from the Outer Hebrides.

At the horizon she noticed land appear timidly and a big smile spread on her face. She was almost there. Her new adventure was about to start. She had taken a sabbatical from work and from her life and decided to go away. She had always been fascinated by Scotland but never had the chance to visit, albeit from London it was only an hour away by plane. So, one day she booked a one way plane ticket to Glasgow, rented a car at the airport and slowly and leisurely started to make her way north.

She had taken her time and the journey took her a week and she was already in love with the West coast of Scotland.

While in London she had bought a guide to Scotland and started doing some research and she had been fascinated by the chapter about the Western Isles or Outer Hebrides. Now she was dying to get off the boat and start exploring and living the island life. 

Over the tannoy she heard the crew announcing they were approaching land. She grabbed her rucksack and made her way down below and waited in queue near the stairs to get to the car deck. She felt giddy. She hasn’t been this giddy in… she couldn’t even remember last time she had felt like this, or if she ever that way at all.

The boat was finally berthed and all tucked in at the pier and a crew member advised the car drivers that they could now access the car deck.

She went to her car and looking ahead she noticed the bow slowly opening to let the cars out. It was her first time on a ferry and even the mere disembarkation process was fascinating. 

One by one all the cars in front of her were directed by the car deck crew to exit and once she was out she took her phone and set up her GPS. She had rented a place for a while and according to the landlord’s directions, once out of the terminal she had to turn right and at the junction turn right again. Her place was one of the many small detached houses along the bay. She fell in love with the house almost immediately when she saw the pictures on the ad online. It had an amazing view of the marina from the bedroom window according to the images and the description. She drove for 5 minutes and the voice told her she had arrived. She parked in the driveway and got off the car and stared at her new place for the time being. The house was painted a very light blue, a small garden at the front and a lovely blue door as a final touch. She grabbed the keys from the secret place she was told and made her way inside the building.

The house was modern and cozy. The owner clearly looked after the property and it actually felt like home. The living room had a big sofa and against the walls a couple of bookcases filled with books. She made a mental note to browse the titles later on. She wanted to explore the house first.

She moved to the next room and found the kitchen. A wonderful wooden and rustic kitchen with a big window that made the light filter in the room. In the middle a wooden table and a couple of chairs. The whole placed smelled like a forest. Her tour took her upstairs to the bedroom and the connected bathroom. The room was quite huge and had a nice king size bed again all made of wood. Childishly she let herself fall on the bed and it was amazing. The bathroom had a big shower room and again was quite modern with wood finish everywhere. The owner definitely loved the rustic style and she was not complaining. It was perfection and she already felt at home.

Her telephone rang breaking the peace and she smiled when she noticed it was her best friend Lysandra. She had been giving her a day to day account of her adventure with a massive amount of photos as well.

“I love it.” She exclaimed excited, sitting on the comfy chair at the opposite side of the bed.

“What?” Asked the woman on the other side of the line. 

“This place. I just got into the house I rented and Lys, this place is marvellous. And the town… I have only seen the marina but I can so, see myself staying here.”

“And abandon London forever?” The woman sounded quite sad.

“You are the only person I would really miss, you know that.”

“Gee, I am touched.”

“Lys… the last year… well you know.” Aelin took a deep breath and lounged deeper on the chair.

“I know darling, I know. I didn’t mean that. I miss you. But I know that you needed this. You haven’t been yourself in a while.” Lysandra replied with a loving tone.

She and Lysandra had been best friends since uni. They went through med school and did their internship together and after they finished they were lucky enough to get to work in the same hospital. They both had raised the ranks pretty quickly and Lysandra had become a kickass orthopaedic surgeon and Aelin had ventured into cardio thoracic surgery. She was good at her job and loved it deeply but the last year had been literally hell for her.

She had been robbed of the chance of becoming head of the department because they gave the position to the son of the current head of the department. And that’s when she started to loose the will to do her job. She kept going on for the patients.

Then Chaol happened and their nasty divorce. Married five years and then months spent battling for divorce and papers and courts and lawyers. He told her she loved her job more than him. They fought. He told her she had changed and she was not anymore the person he married. Then he left her for another woman. As a present she had served him with divorce papers.

She heard Lysandra’s voice and realised she was woolgathering.

“What?”

“I was saying that your ex was in the A&E yesterday, with his new woman.”

“What did he do?”

“Looks like he was horse riding with her and he took a bad fall. His right leg was a big mess and I need to fix it now.” Lysandra paused for a moment “I hope it’s ok.”

“Of course Lys. He is a patient.” Aelin admitted quickly. She hated him but not to the point that she wished him to be denied care.

“He…” Lysandra was hesitant “He asked me about you.” Then she heard her friend laugh “I told her that you were off, taking a break gallivanting around Scotland and making legions of scotsmen fall in love and at you feet professing their undying love to you.”

Aelin laughed out loud at the joke.

“Leave some for me by the way…”

“What about Aedion? I thought you had the hots for him.” Aelin stood and walked to the window and opened it to let the sea breeze come in.

“I do, but I can’t be always the one to make the first move. I gave him a few very clear hints. Now it’s his turn.”

“Poor man.”

“Poor me.”

Aelin heard in the background the sound of a pager.

“Is that yours?”

“Damn yes, Ae, I gotta go. Send me loads of pictures. Love you.”

Lysandra hung up and Aelin stared at the window. The bay was peaceful, with sounds of seagulls and people going about their lives. She smiled and decided it was time to explore and most of all grab some food. She was starving. On the map she spotted a big Tesco nearby perfect for grocery shopping.

She took her backpack and left on foot. No car needed for now, she wanted to see the centre of the town.

She followed the same road she came from the terminal and saw on the corner an interesting building with huge windows and she walked toward it. She arrived and noticed it was called An Lanntair, apparently a community and arts centre with a cinema as well. She entered the place and straight in front of her she noticed a corner selling books and souvenirs. She rushed to the books. Some of them were in the other language spoken on the islands which she had learned was called Gaelic and that still quite a few people spoke. The books were interesting but not enough. She moved to one of the ladies at the counter.

“Hi, I am new here. I arrived this morning and I am out exploring. Do you happen to have a bookshop around here?”

The lady smiled warmly at her “Aye, lass…  just go out here and then right on Cromwell st. and then right again. Rowan has a lovely bookshop. He is quite good and always has interesting titles. Down the road we also have a public library if you are moving here. Not as good as Rowan’s place but still worth visiting.”

“Thank you.” Aelin greeted the woman and left, curious to visit this bookstore.

She followed the directions and there it was. In front of her stood the bookstore. It had three windows, she moved closer and noticed that the main window and it had a very lovely display of children’s books with all the stories from Roald Dahl. She smiled. She loved Roald Dahl. She looked up and noticed the name of the shop “Aislingean pàipeir”. It must have been in Gaelic because she had no idea what it meant. A good excuse to chat with the owner.

She entered the shop and the doorbell rang alerting the owner of her presence. She reached the counter but no one was there. “Hello?” She called out looking around for a sign of life.

“Hi, anyone here? The door was open.”

“Tha mi a ’tighinn a-nis” said a deep voice from a corner of the shop.

The man, Rowan she assumed appeared and she almost forgot how to breathe.

He was tall. A good 1.80m, silver hair and short and eyes of the deepest green. His skin looked tanned and he had a nice healthy build. He was one of the most gorgeous man she had ever seen.

“You must be Rowan.”

------------------

Gaelic:

Tha mi a ’tighinn a-nis - I am coming now

Aislingean pàipeir - paper dreams. ( I know the name of the shop is probably lousy...sorry...)

I Just Want My Heart Back: Sam Winchester x Reader

A/N: Hello friends! Well, I thought it was time to update my Supernatural masterlist since I’ve been writing so much for Marvel and Harry Potter. It’s been way too long since I wrote something that wasn’t holiday related for Supernatural and after talking to a very good friend, I came up with this! 

BIG shoutout to @calaofnoldor because she gave some wonderful little nudges and suggestions for this and I’m quite proud of how quickly I put this together. The title for this was her idea, as well as this GIF so thank you lovely for all your help!

Warnings: Angst, swearing, breakup, jealous!Sam, mentions of sex, boobs (yep that’s a warning lol) and implied sex but nothing too filthy cause y’all know that’s not how I roll (and I want y’all to use your imaginations too ;))

Word Count: 4,383 

Supernatural Masterlist| Masterlist of all Masterlists

Feedback is greatly appreciated! Tag lists requests are OPEN as well as my inbox!

*Italics are flashbacks and POV*

-Monique

“I don’t think this is working out,” Sam says, coming to you one day after a hunt gone bad.

“What isn’t working out?” You ask, looking up to the taller Winchester.

“Us, you and me. You living and working with us. All of it.” He says, refusing to make eye contact.

“What? What do you mean it’s not working out? What’s the problem? I’ve been living with you and Dean for the last two years! Why is there suddenly an issue?” You question.

“Well lately, (Y/N) you’ve been really reckless on these hunts we’ve been going on,” he answers, still not looking at you.

“What? Reckless? I’m a hunter, Sam. I take chances just like you and Dean do and they don’t always go as planned, like today.”

“Exactly, that was really stupid of you to go in that warehouse by yourself,” he says as you’re taken back to the events of the day.

“Alright, Sam, you and I will scout out the warehouse, see if we come across any vics. (Y/N) I need you to be on the lookout and alert us if someone’s coming,” Dean said, with Sam next to him, guns aimed and ready to fire. But they looked to you and you were nowhere to be found.

“(Y/N)?” Dean whisper yells for you.

“Dean!” Sam says, panic filling his voice. The youngest brother pointed in the direction of where he was looking straight ahead, seeing you running inside the warehouse.

“Son of a bitch!” Dean yells as he and Sam run after you.

You were too far ahead to hear them running after you until it was too late. An entire pack of vampires had rushed you, trying desperately to sink their teeth into you. A good dozen or more were surrounding you and you began swinging, taking your knife to slice off the heads of the monsters as they grew too close. Screams of the victims could be heard as you fought hard, soon realizing you went alone. Just as one vamp lost its head, another was right behind you and sank its teeth into your shoulder. You scream out in agony; the venom was quickly spreading through your body.

“(Y/N)!” Sam yells to you, watching as you fall to the ground; the pain bringing you to your knees.

“Sam, we can’t stop, there are too many vamps out here!”

“She’s going to turn into one of them if we don’t help her, Dean!”

“Cas! If you can hear us, get your feathery ass down here and save (Y/N)!” Dean yells and then, a fluttering of wings came down in front of you.

“Hello (Y/N), let me take a look at you,” Cas says, kneeling beside you and carefully moving your collar of your shirt away from where you were a bit. You hiss out in pain as the wound was now exposed to the air around you.

“Alright (Y/N) luckily I was able to get here just in time before it got too bad so I can heal you enough now to transport you back to the Bunker but I’ll have to extract the venom from you later. okay?” Cas explained.

“Just, do it!” You cry and a blinding light flashed around you, causing you to lose your sight for just a moment but the sound of vamps being killed was the last thing you heard.

 “Alright, I admit, that wasn’t the best decision I could’ve come up with but I’m okay!”

“Yeah, but today wasn’t the first time you got hurt really bad on a hunt!” Sam yelled, suddenly making himself seem even bigger than he already was.

“What are you saying, Sam? You want me to leave?”

“Yes. I can’t keep worrying about you getting hurt because you’re too damn stubborn to listen to a damn thing Dean or I tell you! We’re more experienced hunters, (Y/N), we know what’s safe and what’s not. We can’t that burden over our heads,” He says.

You felt the tears brimming to the surface of your eyes but with the words he just spoke, you couldn’t let him see you upset.

“Alright, um, I’ll go pack my things and be out of your way.” You say, brushing past your now ex-boyfriend, but making sure to hit him hard as you did so.

When you reached your room, a photo of you and Sam sat on the end-table beside your bed, the smiling faces just mocking you. Grabbing the frame, you throw it across the room and scream at the broken glass now scattered across the floor.

“Fuck you, Sam Winchester!” You yell, hoping to anyone that he was listening.

You and Sam had always been close and just recently started dating. Sure, it was challenging but you thought since you were in the business too, it would be easier to work out any differences you may face; you were clearly mistaken. Taking a duffel bag from out of your closet, you throw all your clothes and toiletries inside, packing up furiously. When you were sure you had everything, you find a scratch piece of paper and write up a note for Dean. You and he were close too; he was like your older brother.

 Dean,

I am so sorry to be writing you this letter but I’ve been informed that I should not be living or hunting with you and Sam anymore. Apparently, I am a burden to you guys and you don’t want to have to worry about my well-being on every case. I guess I am just like you though; stubborn as a mule. I thought that was a good thing but according to Sam, it’s not. I thought he and I could work through anything because I became a hunter too, but I was wrong about that, too.

I’m not sure where he and I went wrong, but today was the straw that broke the camel’s back. I love him, Dean, I really do, but I guess he doesn’t love me enough to keep fighting for a relationship with me. I have a friend who’s a hunter who offered a place for me to stay and is willing to teach me new skills to improve myself as a hunter and who knows, maybe by then, Sam will actually want me around as a partner.

I’m going to miss eating greasy burgers and staying in cheap motels and watching Western’s with you but this is for the best. I can’t be around someone who doesn’t want me around and Sam has made that very clear that he doesn’t care about me anymore.

Here’s my address of where I’ll be staying at for a while; just don’t tell Sam where I’m at. I need to grieve the loss of one of the best things that have ever happened to me. I wish him well though, please tell him that.

I hope to stay in touch with you; you’ve always been like a big brother to me. I love you Dean and I’ll call you when I get to my new home.

Love, (Y/N)

Folding up the paper, you grab your bag and your keys for your car. Walking past Dean’s room, you slide the letter under his door and knock on it, before rushing towards the stairs out when you heard Sam calling for Dean.

“What’s up, Sammy?” Dean asks when he opens his door, noticing the note in front of him.

“I think I found a case for us to work. What’s that?” Sam said, looking at the paper in his brothers’ hand. Just then, the sound of a vehicle starting and driving away interrupted them.

“Who’s leaving?” Dean asked, walking out to the War Room; Sam remaining silent. “What?”

Sam remained quiet for a while until Dean starting growing angry.

“(Y/N) left,” Sam finally said.

“What? What do you mean, (Y/N) left?” Dean asked, still furious with his little brother.

“Where did she go, Sam?”

“I don’t know,” Sam said, avoiding the conversation he just had with (Y/N).

Just then, Dean remembered the letter that was on his bedroom floor. He reached for it from his back pocket and opened it.

Sam watched as Dean’s eyes bounced back and forth across the page; he was starting to feel guilty.

“You told her to leave?” Dean asked, in a calm voice but Sam didn’t peak.

“Answer me, Sammy! Did you tell (Y/N) to leave?!” Dean’s voice escalated.

“Yes,” Sam simply answered.

“Great, you know she’s gone, right? She said we see her as a burden? Did-did you tell her that?!”

“Yes,”

“Oh my God, Sam! That’s just great! You know she was the best thing that ever happened to you and you just push her away like that? Why?”

“She was always getting hurt, Dean? What was I supposed to do? Tell her she was doing a good job at constantly getting hurt?” Sam yelled back to his brother.

“Yes! She was stubborn like we are but she was willing to become a hunter just so she could be with you, Sammy! She loved your dumb ass and what, because she got hurt all the time, you stopped loving her?”

“No, I-I never said I don’t love her anymore,”

“Well, she thinks you don’t love her! And you know what else she said in this letter? She said she needs time to grieve the best thing that ever happened to her!”

Sam was quiet for a minute, letting his brothers’ words sink in. The girl he was in love with, was gone forever, all because he hated how stubborn she was and how she never listened. She was just like him and that bothered him. He didn’t want her to be like him, so broken and hurt, but she was also good. She was beautiful and had a positive outlook on life; always bringing happiness to the brothers when they were down. She was young and full of life, always caring about everyone else before herself and maybe that was why she always got hurt. But she loved Sam and he couldn’t understand why, but he felt lucky to have her. Maybe he was overreacting; he got hurt a lot too. It was part of the job to get hurt saving people’s lives and not everyone could do it but (Y/N)? She was good at it because she cared for people so much, way more than he or Dean even could.

“Did she say where she was going?” Sam suddenly asks, growing worried about where she had gone.

“She did, but she doesn’t want you to know. You really hurt her, Sam,” Dean said.

“I know, I fucked up bad. I thought if she wasn’t here anymore, that she couldn’t get hurt, and then I wouldn’t have to worry about her so much. At least, if she went away, she would be safe, but I don’t even know that to be true,” Sam confesses.

“Your plan just completely backfired on you,”

“Yeah, I made things worse, and for what?”

“Because I thought this was the best way to protect her and when she got hurt, Dean, she was almost always near death. I-I couldn’t stand seeing her like that because I knew there was a better way but she always had to go down the harder and more painful path.”

“Yeah, and you know why she did that?” Dean asked.

“Why?”

“Because she was a Winchester. She was stubborn and hard-headed but she is a fighter and she always believed in the best in people. And what did you do? You tried to penalize her for it,” Dean said.

“I know, I really fucked up here. I gotta try and find her, Dean. Tell her I was wrong,” Sam said, going to grab keys for one of the vehicles the brothers owned.

“Dude, she doesn’t want to see you,” Dean reminded him of the letter.

“Well, she didn’t leave that long ago. She couldn’t have gotten too far; I have to try,” Sam argued back.

“Want me to go with you?” Dean asked but Sam shook his head.

“I need you to stay here just in case she comes back home,” Sam says before realizing the Bunker wasn’t (Y/N)’s home anymore. “Just stay here.”

Sam grabbed a jacket and his phone before rushing off to the garage and jumping in behind the wheel of a car. Just before he sped away, Dean came out to the garage with a set of keys in his hands.

“Here,” he said, tossing the keys to Sam.

“Baby? You’re letting me take her?” Sam questioned, surprised that his brother trusted him with his most prized possession.

“Yeah, she’s pretty reliable and will get you where you need to go. Plus, (Y/N) loves her. If you do end up catching up with her, the least you can do is show up in a good-looking car,” Dean smirked as Sam threw the other keys back to him. 

Throwing the car into drive, Sam sped out of the garage, desperate to find (Y/N) and hoping he wasn’t too far behind her. He wanted to apologize to her, tell her he still loved her, and was only speaking out of frustration. Of course, he wanted her to stay and keep hunting with him and Dean but he worried about her a lot, and seeing her hurt all the time, wasn’t good for anyone. Maybe he was being selfish but he thought he was doing the right thing for everyone when he really was hurting the one person who meant the most to him. He pushed the gas pedal down as hard as he could, not caring about the speed limits, and looking around to see if her vehicle had stopped anywhere, as his mind kept wandering off to the letter she left for Dean. Why didn’t she leave one for him? Did he hurt her that bad? 

Sam’s POV

Damnit, I shouldn’t have told her to go and now, I can’t find her. What if I do find her and she doesn’t want anything to do with me anymore? She easily could tell me to go to hell; I mean I did that already but it would be worse hearing it from her. Would she ever let me explain where I was coming from? If she didn’t, I don’t think I would blame her; I wouldn’t let me explain. I hadn’t realized how long I had been driving for but it was starting to get dark. My speed had decreased drastically as I figured I should pull over and rest for the night. It’d be no good for me driving at night when I was this upset over the whole situation. Maybe this still made me seem selfish but I didn’t want to end up dead before I got to her. Seeing a small bar off the side of the road, I go to pull into the parking lot, searching for (Y/N)’s car just in case she had done the same as me. 

Getting out of the car, I lock Baby up and head inside, anxious to see if (Y/N) was there. Looking around the room, I’m met with a bunch of unfamiliar faces. I walk to the bar and order a shot of whiskey. The liquid burned as it went down my throat and temporarily made me feel better but that feeling went away quickly. Just as I was about to order my next shot, I look over out of the corner of my right eye and see that familiar face; the one who had been driving me insane. 

She was sitting at a booth with some guy who couldn’t keep his hands off of her but she didn’t seem to mind. Was she crazy?! This guy is disgusting! How could she be okay with him touching her? I’m the only one who is allowed to touch her. Wait, no, I can’t think like that; I’m the one who broke up with her. But did she have to be looking at him with those big (y/e/c) eyes? And that perfect smile? She used to look at me like that all the time and now? My last memory of her was the look of pure sadness and somber; like I just kicked a puppy or something. No, I just broke her heart. Alright, I hate myself but I need to do something about it instead of just sitting here and watching her fall all over some random guy. I may regret this later but I figure I should go with it and see what happens.

“Hey baby, there you are. I was starting to worry about you,” I say, pulling a chair over to sit on the opposite side of where her “date” was. She looked over at me with a look of disgust but my jealous side told me I was doing the right thing. 

“Go away, I don’t want to talk to you,” she says, turning back to the other guy, so I did the next best thing I thought to do. I stand up and wrap an arm around her waist, hoisting her over my shoulder. She screamed and started cussing me out, causing everyone to look at us. 

“Just our honeymoon is all, she’s a bit nervous,” I lied, looking at the bartender who just nodded his head and smirked; dirty old man. Walking back out to Baby, (Y/N) hits my back several times, telling me I must’ve lost my mind to be treating her like this and she is going to fucking scream when I finally let her down. 

“(Y/N) please, just let me explain,” I say, finally setting her down but still holding onto her arm.

“Why should I Sam? You made it very clear that we were over and that I was a burden to you; why can’t you just let me go? I just want my heart back because you destroyed it,” She says trying to wiggle free from my grasp.

“I can’t let you go,” I say, letting her out of my hold.

“You just did a few hours ago!” She says, growing frustrated with me.

“I didn’t mean anything I said back then; I’m so sorry,” I try to reason with her but I can tell she’s not buying it. 

“Why even say it then?” She scoffs, rolling her eyes at me. 

“I was talking out of my frustration. I hate seeing get hurt; you’ve almost died more than once. I hate that you’re just as much a Winchester as Dean and I are; just as stubborn. But you’re a damn good hunter and we’ve gotten better at this job because of you. I can’t imagine not having you hunt with us anymore; you’re too damn important to me now. I want you to stay; I need you to stay.”

She was quiet for a minute then spoke up, “you told me I was a burden to you, Sam. Do you know how that made me feel? You made me think you didn’t love me anymore. So when you told me to leave, I couldn’t fathom the words that were coming from your mouth. I sat in my car about a mile outside the Bunker and balled my eyes out. Do you not realize what you mean to me? I love you, Sam, but you just tossed me aside like I was nothing.” 

“That wasn’t my intention, (Y/N)! I-I thought I was protecting you!” I yell.

“Okay you really don’t want to be yelling at me right now when you’re already on thin ice here, Winchester,” she warns and I apologize. 

“I promise, that wasn’t what I meant to do. I thought I was protecting you by telling you, you were a burden on us. I knew that if I asked you not to hunt with us for a while, you’d just argue with me about why that’s not fair, so I figured if I told you that it was becoming too difficult for us to always care for you, that you would sit back yourself. And then it spiraled out of control from there and I kept up with the act that I didn’t care about you because I had to make you believe that you weren’t safe hunting. I never told you I didn’t love you; I can’t believe you thought that. I love you more than I’ve loved anyone else and I know that’s a lot to hear because we’ve only really been dating for a short time but we started off as friends first and I knew from that very first day you came to us for help on a case, that I loved you. And then when you told me you had feelings for me too, I was so happy because finally, here’s this amazing woman who understands the business because she does it herself and I love her. But I talked to Dean and he made me realize I probably made the biggest mistake of my life and I am so, so sorry. I only said everything I did because I cared too damn much about your well-being. And I know, it’s dumb and doesn’t make any sense but it’s the truth. I hope you can forgive me and we can go back to just being us. And I am so sorry you cried; I hate when you’re sad. But if you’ll let me, I want to make it up to you.” 

There was silence was settled between us for an agonizing amount of time before she did something I wasn’t expecting. She quickly closed the space between us and grabbed the back of my head to pull me into a kiss. Instantly, I grab onto her hips, holding her into place, while my lips let her know how much I truly missed her. I was growing tired of leaning over so I lifted her to my level, easily able to intensify the kiss. She held onto the back of my shirt like she was afraid she was dreaming and I would disappear at any minute, but I tried to convince her that I wasn’t going anywhere; I was too far invested in this. I broke the kiss for a minute, looking at the beautiful girl in my arms. 

“I have an idea,” I said, setting her down and unlocking the car. She watches me closely as I unlock the door she was standing closest to and open the door to her. 

“Get in,” I say. She does but doesn't understand what I was implying until I grabbed the bottom hemline of my shirt and lifted it over my head. When she realized what my idea was, she followed my lead, lifting her shirt over her head and threw it on the floor of the car. I duck down and make my way inside to the back seat, hovering over her as she lays across the seat. She looked up at me, never breaking eye contact until I kissed her again. My hands traveled down her body, and she reacted to my touch, back arching into me. She pulled away to remove her bra before attaching her lips to mine again. As more and more articles of clothing were being removed, she broke the silence for a minute.

“You know, Dean is going to kill us when he finds out we had sex back here.” 

I laugh, knowing she was telling the truth and thinking what my brother’s reaction was going to be.

“Well, he doesn’t have to know; we’ll get her cleaned before we go back to the Bunker,” I say, trying not to make a big deal out of what we had planned. 

“Oh, I don’t know, plus, how many times has he had sex back here?” She asked and I paused to think about it.

“You know, you’re probably right. I’m sure it’s been numerous times! Wanna just go check into that motel over there?” I suggest, throwing my head to the side to motion to the motel. 

“I mean, that’s tempting but equally as disgusting. You know how questionable those rooms are! If we’re going to have sex, I want it to be special!” She kept her stance on the topic. 

I sigh but realize she was right. I didn’t want to just sleep with her in the backseat of a car or at a dingy motel. As much as I was really wanting to go through with this, I figured we would have a much better time back at the Bunker. 

“Alright, how about we just make out like some crazy teenagers for now and save the rest for later,” I suggested, wiggling my eyebrows at her. She laughs for a moment before reaching down to pick her bra back up but I stopped her.

“Why don’t you just leave that off for now,” I say, eyes trailing down to ger exposed chest before a devilish grin made its way across my face. Her cheeks redden but she throws the bra back and brings me back for another kiss, my hands traveling their way over each breast, savoring the way her skin felt against mine. I missed this feeling; having her with me and exploring every part of each other. And not just for a day or just to ‘scratch an itch,’ but because we loved one another and I needed her to know just how vital she was to my life. Without her, I cannot go on; I know this from experience so I knew I needed to do whatever it took to make her realize that I loved her. 

And after a while and we began our journey home, my hand in hers as she sang along to the cassette tapes Dean had, I knew I finally found the happiness that I thought I couldn’t find because of the life I chose to lead and a life I prayed would never change. It may have been selfish to desire a happiness such as this but I also know I struggled to find peace so now that I have it, it’s like a precious artifact that I will fight to protect at all costs, no matter the risk to my own life, because that I what you do when you love someone. 

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