I would trust like none of you with my story if I was a cc. People like you are the reason people like me don’t talk about being hurt.

Piglin!Technoblade and Mate!Dream

Loving this request cause that’s mostly how I write them in A/B/O settings lol. However this is NOT A/B/O and decided to not write it in the DSMP Universe but simply normal Minecraft worldish. Kinda? Hope that makes sense lol

Techno is NOT a complete Piglin, he still has human features and can talk etc. like a human, however he lives with Piglins etc. Reason for that is that I don’t really write full Piglin Techno as this is something I’m not really comfortable with. As in, Piglin’s have full on snouts and can’t really talk nor understand human language etc and therefore Dream nor Techno could ever give consent to anything sooo, yeah. HOWEVER, he has a full Piglin form! He’s not always in it and mostly when around other Piglins but yeah. That’s how I went with this request, hope you like it! :]

Also again a lot of World building, sorry!

After this there is one more request that was sent in before they were closed! Then Imma start working on my other stories again! :]

Words: 1.864

A life in luxury was what most people wanted, what they desired. They’d do a lot to achieve it, work till they’re too exhausted for anything else, sell all their belonging, steal from others or even kill. Dream reached the goal of luxury in a different way, one he hadn’t really thought of but that worked out somehow. That way was called love.

Being the mate of the leader of a Piglin bastion had definitely it’s pro sites, one being that Dream basically swam in gold. Almost every day he got a new golden gift from his partner, either in the form of jewelry or a weapon. He loved the golden rings around his arms just as much as he appreciated the golden dagger he had gotten only a month ago.

They were all special to him as his partner – Technoblade – and him were in the final stage of courting. Which meant a lot of gifts in different forms. Sometimes Dream felt bad for not gifting anything back, humans simply didn’t court, they start dating and that’s it. But Piglins have actual courting rituals, traditions to show when you courted someone so that the possible mate knew but also all the other Piglins.

And like said before, Techno was a special Piglin, one who had two forms and was the leader of a bastion. Not a broken one but a still full functioning one with piglin stables, housing units and multiple treasure rooms. Outside the bastion was a village surrounded by crimson forest, it was impressive considering most bastions were destroyed. Techno was their leader, making sure not traveler would harm them or steal anymore, he was the most powerful of all of them.

However, all this also had a downside and that was Dream couldn’t really do whatever he wanted. Because even though the Piglins respected Techno and accepted him as their leader, they were still just… Piglins. They couldn’t really talk or communicate like Dream, they weren’t dumb or anything, but they were different, had different believes. And sometimes they either didn’t accept Dream and tried to get rid of him or, cause he had so much gold, wanted him for themselves.

Nothing ever really happened, Dream could defend himself and all, but still, Techno felt better when the man didn’t walk around without him. Sometimes Dream ignored that, grapped good armor and hid his identity to walk over the markets or discover more of the nether. Those were fun days, but Techno often got mad afterwards, telling Dream he shouldn’t just wander around and wait for Techno to have time and join him.

But Techno had a lot to do and therefore not as much time as he wished. Which left Dream mostly in their bedroom, staring at the ceiling in boredom and wondering when his partner will return. Just like he did right now, wearing a short and floaty top that didn’t really hide much with transparent puffy sleeves attached to it and a cloth around his hips with cuts at the sides for his legs.

He stared up at the ceiling as he was stretched out on their giant back, looking at the chandelier that hung from the black stones. With a loud sigh he turned on his side, instead staring out of the window, seeing a tower across with Piglin Brutes looking around, crossbows in their hands. A sudden screaming sound caught his attention and a Ghast appeared, shooting a fireball at the Brutes.

Dream jumped up and ran to the window, leaning a bit out of it as he watched the Brutes trying to shoot the Ghast. It kept shooting and the Brutes seemed to be a bit overwhelmed with dodging the fire while also trying to kill the monster. The blond was about to grab his axe and jump out the window to take care of it himself, but he was stopped when he saw another Piglin came running.

It was obvious who it was, a bit taller than the others, a crown on his head and a red cape floating behind him in the wind. Dream leaned back, watched as Techno – his mate – shot the fireball right back at the Ghast, killing it with one try. The Brutes nodded and bowed in front of him, showing their gratitude and respect towards the other Piglin. Meanwhile Dream touched his neck with one hand and bit his lower lip, watching Techno checking on the damage.

Techno had been courting Dream for a long time now and it was time for him to finish it up. The last part of the courting was a handmade head accessory that resembled a crown in some way, turning Dream into an equal to Techno. But the Piglin took his time, was very clear with what he wanted and made sure not to push Dream in any way. Even though sometimes Dream hoped for some kind of pushing.

Dream kept watching the Piglins, leaning his head on his hand while leaning on the windowsill. It seemed like Techno told them what to do to fix it and also calling some more Brutes to his side, pointing around the area. Probably told them to check out for more dangers, lately a lot more Ghasts appeared and Techno had been investigating it.

Suddenly, when Dream wasn’t expecting it, he met blood red eyes, staring at him. He gulped as his mate looked at him, not looking away for a second, not even when he started walking. Only when he walked down the steps that lead back into the bastion did the eye contact break.

Hurriedly Dream threw himself back on the bed, trying to get in some kind of good looking pose but failing miserably. He groaned lightly as he turned on his stomach for the third time, freezing up when he heard the door behind him slowly open. When he looked over his shoulder he saw Technoblade standing there, still in his Piglin form.

The Brute walked up to the bed, the door falling close behind him. Dream slowly sat up, watching the Piglin move around. In this form Techno looked almost like every other Piglin Brute, just a bit bigger and with red eyes instead of the typical white ones. Slowly he moved up to Dream, the man leaning back on his hands at the Piglin got in his personal space. “Hey honey,” Dream mumbled, looking over the Piglin face, the snout moving lightly as he sniffed around him.

Usually Techno turned into his more human form when around Dream, so communications would be easier. Dream could read Techno partly in this form, but he could never learn the language and Techno couldn’t understand the human language like this. In those moments Techno reacted only on instincts regarding Dream and Dream only reacted on what he thought his partner wanted.

Techno squeaked lightly, pressing his snout against Dream’s cheek, making him giggle. “Nooo! Don’t!” He laughed, falling back on the bed as Techno fell atop of him, the snout wandering to Dream’s neck where he was sensitive, his laughing grew louder. “That tickles! Stop it! Please!” He tried pushing the man off of him, which was hard when you were dying from laughter. Eventually the snout stopped and Techno buried his eyes in Dream’s neck instead, big arms wrapping around the lean form of the human.

Dream sighed in relaxation, smiling and leaning his head against Techno’s. Even though the never was naturally really hot – that’s why he wore the clothes he was wearing – he never got enough from Techno’s body heat. He could cuddle his partner all day and night and he wouldn’t care about being all sweaty, cause he had the love of his life in his arms.

Eventually Techno pulled back, leaning on his hands over his partner before turning into his more human form. The snout disappeared and left behind a rather big and slightly crooked nose. The white teeth stayed, poking out of the now human mouth and where no hair was before were now pink locks flowing down over his shoulder.

Again Dream smiled, one hand moving up to cup the man’s cheek. “Hey,” he repeated, chuckling when Techno leaned into his hand.

“Hey,” Techno echoed, sighing as he leaned down to place a kiss on Dream’s softer lips, fast moving down to his neck. “How’s my mate doin’?” he asked, pressing up closer to said mate, his other hand stroking Dream’s side.

The blond hummed, enjoying getting the attention he had craved all day, or more like the attention he craved all the time. “I’m good,” he mumbled back, moving his head to give more space to the pinkette, feeling teeth nibbling at his skin. “Bored, as always.”

Technoblade chuckled amused, finally pulling back and admiring the red mark he had left behind. “Sorry, but I have to attend my duties,” he explained, one finger coming up to the mark and carefully stroking over it before finding Dream’s green eyes. “But soon you can come with me, when you accept my last gift.”

When Techno stood up and took a step back Dream sat up as fast as he could, eyes wide and concentrated on his partner. Techno got down at one knee, eyes not once leaving Dream’s. “Dream,” he started, slowly pulling out something from behind his back. It looked like a headpiece made out of gold, hanging limply from Techno’s big hands. Smaller golden leaves hung off of it and in the middle was an emerald, shining in the light of the shroomlight that hung above of them. “Would you do me the honor and officially become my mate? Help me take care of our Bastion and protect our land by my side till our death and beyond?”

Dream’s mouth fell open as he stared at the headpiece, knowing that it was Techno himself who did it. That was the tradition and even though Dream knew how good his partner was in forging, he never saw something as detailed at this piece. His eyes flew back up at Techno, he felt tears welling in his eyes and when a worried look grew on Techno’s face, a bright smile grew on Dreams. Before he could even say something his head started nodding and his hands moved to touch Techno’s face. “Of course I do!”

A smile even brighter spread over Techno’s lips as the answer reached his piglin ears. He moved forward to press a long and affectionate kiss on Dream’s lips, not breaking it for a couple of seconds before finally pulling away and carefully placing the grown atop of Dream’s head. The blond tried to hold back his tears, knowing it wouldn’t matter as they would just evaporate after a few seconds. The emerald hung low on Dream’s forehead, fitting perfectly to Dream’s own green eyes which Techno often described as said gem.

Together the two sat on the bed, Dream leaning against his love with one arm around him, the other entwined with Dream’s. “My mate,” Techno whispered against Dream’s ear, placing a kiss against his temple.

“Your mate,” Dream answered before going in for a real kiss, one of many.

Uh. Hi. I don’t know why I can’t choose a single thing for an ask game but this one was particularly bad so I. Just.

I chose six. Don’t be mad. Hope it’s okay.

So. 2, 8, 14, 22, 35, 38 for the writing ask game…?

MaD?? I’m over the MOON. I LOVE talking about my writing!!

2. If you had to give up your keyboard and write your stories exclusively by hand, could you do it? If you already write everything by hand, a) are you a wizard and b) pen or pencil?

Oh my god fuck no. I’d run out of paper, and I’d have doodles all over Everything, and I’d jump from chapter to chapter. My brain does not like to be patient or linear, so any paper document I’ve handwritten on is,,,,, a bomb site.

8. If you had to write an entire story without either action or dialogue, which would you choose and how would it go?

Literally allll of my WIPs rely on Those Two Things. And as much as I love Love LOVE dialogue, I think there’s something very intimate in silence, especially in scenarios where speech seems fundamental. I could do that, but it wouldn’t be a very long story, nor would it be much good!! bUt. Things written as just dialogue, like… the fuckin… End Poem in Minecraft. They hit. They just? When done right, they’re beautiful. I am.. undecided.

14. Do you lend your books to people? Are people scared to borrow books from you? Do you know exactly where all your “lost” books are and which specific friend from school you haven’t seen in twelve years still possesses them? Will you ever get them back?

Oh my fucking god. I lent my friend a book once. Actually, I lent her THREE books. That was THREE years ago. I got them back in January of THIS. YEAR. Never again. I’m keeping them right here with me. My friends are Terrified to borrow books from me because I’ll eat them alive if they damage them. I’ve seen how they treat their paperbacks, I don’t need mine to get the same treatment.

22. How organized are you with your writing? Describe to me your organization method, if it exists. What tools do you use? Notebooks? Binders? Apps? The Cloud?

I write on Google Docs, but I am Notes app’s biggest fan. I love you, Notes app!!!! I also plan a Lot of fics and stories in random notebooks I have lying around. When I put my mind to it, I can usually create a good list to summarise chapters, and that’s about as organised as it gets, I’m afraid.

35. What’s your favorite writing rule to smash into smithereens?

‘dOn’T uSe lOts oF cOmmAs’, bitch?! Dickens did it, and so can I.

‘dOn’t sWiTch pOvS’, no!!! No. Say it with me: different points of view develop the world, the story, and other characters infinitely better than one POV!!!

‘dOn’t uSe toO maNy wOrds’— my WIP, my rules <3

38. What is something about your writing process YOU think is Really Weird? If you are comfortable, please share. If you’re not comfortable, what do you think cats say about us?

Whenever I have little dialogues I want to check make sense, I act them out. Very professionally, mind you, I take this seriously. Either that, or I run through scenes in my head like they’re movies!! 

thank you. sOOO much. I am smiling and screaming and all that.

u know what. i will give u all the lore u want. i’m 18, will be 19 decently soon so we are close to the same age. also the other band was r5. i have sent u asks about them and tde in the past. i followed you for atl content and got whiplash when u started posting about the first band i ever loved. i was like 10 when their first album dropped i have been around for entirely too long. i had a wattpad account and wrote r5 fanfic from the tender age of like 11-13. i discovered 5sos i don’t even remember how but i think the funniest part about it is that i never really got into their music?? i got into them as people by watching like interviews and compilations. and i mean at this point that was a While ago. SPEAKING OF FANFIC i did that like ao3 year in review thing like a month ago??? and you were my top author of the year so far. i read a lot of fic on ao3. your fics are very lovely and some of my favs. moving on. will not lie my music taste is kinda embarrassing and has barely changed since i was like 14 lmfao. been listening to a lot of waterparks lately. have been since their album dropped in may. i essentially go through phases of listening to solely one artist. or one playlist i made. most recently my taste has consisted of a lot of all time low, waterparks, paramore + hayley’s solo music (it really had to grow on me BUT now that it has it is very good), also been on a nostalgic r5 kick as well. hot take it has been quite difficult for me to get into tde’s music and i don’t really know why. some songs i absolutely adore (omg plz don’t come around is my fav by them. also scared of heights, feel you now, welcome to the end of your life are top songs too) but others i’m just. i have never liked preacher man and it’s the first song they released after they rebranded in like 2017. i love to see them finally free to do what they love music-wise but some of it is just. hard to listen to. i’m supposed to see them live in november (like 4 days before my birthday, kinda cool) and it’s the second time the show has been rescheduled so hopefully it happens. i’ve seen them live before but not since they rebranded. they’re dropping an album in october that i will have like a month to learn so it better be a fucking banger. now i’m just rambling about tde because i love ross and rocky with my entire being. rydel is annoying these days tho. also she named her baby fucking SUPER what kind of name is that why would you do that to a child. anyways. you ever need useless random r5 lore, i’m the person to ask. it’s the effect of being around to like a band for like 8 years. in conclusion my music taste? terrible. a cluster fuck. i will listen to luke’s solo album next time i’m focusing on a task because i like listening to new music when i’m concentrating on something. there’s some other bella lore for the day. - other bella

OH ALSO yeah idk. i’m currently on mobile. when i looked at your blog on mobile the first time last night it was blue. but now it’s pink. i have yet to see it on desktop but when i do i am sure it will be equally as pretty. - other bella again

hell YES some other bella lore. let's dig in

oooooh how soon? whens your birthday? 👀👀👀

ahhh yes i do remember the r5 asks !!!! that was a fun little era of clumsyclifford content huh. dont worry i wrote 1d fic on wattpad from ages 11-13 as well sooo same hat. that is super funny tho actually that you never bothered to listen to their music u really were staying loyal to r5 good for you

ao3 year in review???????????? say more?????? what is this?????????? thats very flattering regardless omg im going to ask you what your favorites are because im a leo just kidding its because i crave validation and im curious what ones you read/have read. also thank you for reading my fics lol

oh yeah theres a new parx album!! i dont listen actively to them but i really like all the parx music i know. im scared to get really into them because im genuinely afraid to fall in love with awsten knight. like im not joking thats the reason. i have to listen to more of their music tho cos i really enjoy what i know so...if you have recs...👀 i'm listening

mm thats a good lineup of music to listen to!! paramore is another band i never got super into, i meant to and then i listened to all of riot and then i learned that hayley williams is like pretty christian and that a few paramore songs are more christian than i anticipated and now i'm like. on the fence about it all. but i wanna listen to after laughter i just havent gotten around to it yet. and i did like riot. i like paramore. i like dead horse by hayley, i didnt like the other single she released, and i didnt listen to her solo music because i didnt like the first single so im not sure if i would actually like it? i am accepting vibe checks in that category though i dont really know what kinda music it is. actually now that im thinking about it doesnt she have two albums now???? i feel like the answer is yes. anyway. moving on

that is very fair the thing abt the tde stuff is that it's all so interesting and so different from every other tde song like they really just do something unique in each song which i think is awesome but also makes it hard to like every song bc it's not like one universal vibe you kinda have to decide for each song if you're enjoying it or not. i do LOVEEEE tde though, im very jealous that you're seeing them perform. although i dont know why im not, just looked it up and theyre gonna be in new york on november 24th which is a sunday so i miiiight.....be able to go.......maybe...........their website says the 25th which is a monday so maybe i was under the impression the show was on a monday?? but the ticket site says sunday. 👀 we will just...have to see......what we see.............

ANYWAY

RIGHT im so excited for their album i was mistakenly thinking it was coming out the same night as luke's but it was just the new single which i really liked on a first listen but have to listen to again cos ive only heard it the one time. but i hope it fucks. they announced that the album is called girlfriend which personally i think is really fun so i have high hopes

SHE NAMED HER CHILD FUCKIN WHAT NOW???????????????

wait eight years thats a long time but also thats roughly how long ive been around 1d wtf........insane. madness. and in fairness probably roughly how long ive been around 5sos but i took a hiatus from both of those bands during high school so im not sure how much i can count all of those years. ive been around all time low for six years though, that's pretty good. anywayyyy i hope you like luke's album but no pressure man listen whenever you feel like it. LOVE YOU

I Ran Out of Fuel

Everyone has their fuel. And by fuel, I meant the reason to live or the will to move in every second. Some might be unaware of it but it doesn’t mean that it does not exist. A lot of unknown things in this universe are just waiting to be discovered. Also, sometimes, you just forget about things until you’ve found them again, and somehow, it will just feel like the first time you’ve known about it.

For the past weeks or months or years, I’ve spent my time wondering about life; about how things just pop out of nowhere, then, push your emotions out of you until you get used to it, then it will just vanish. Like, why? Why do I have to face that kind of loneliness? Why do I have to live with the memory of it being with me? Why does that “thing” have to leave those memories to me? I’d be a thousand times better if I could just not remember having those times of my life with it.

But on the contrary, it would be awful to not have some memory to reminisce about or a thing to miss from time to time. I mean, after all, you will be used to the feeling of not having it in your life at some other time. It might take years but at least, it will come.

Ever since I was this soft kind of person. I tend to attach to a lot of things easily. I used to keep food wrappers when I was a kid because “we” had spent (at least) a few minutes together. Then, my mother will get mad because I keep trashes in my bag, she will throw those and I’d feel bad for those wrappers, I know it sounds dumb but I was a kid… And admit it or not, most kids are dumb. Lol.

Then, I *kind of* grow up, I got interested in “love” and the wonders of it. I met someone through the internet, after a few days or week of talking, I got attached to that person… and maybe, that attachment went deeper than that, maybe I fell in love. I didn’t wanna say that it’s l-o-v-e because, all we did was chat with each other for hours, and I was sooo young. He (or she) was like seven to ten years older than me, and we never met or call each other. So, how the hell could that be love? Anyway, it was (probably) infatuation and I was the only one who felt that. I’m certain of that because I confessed, and *felt* that, too.

After the time I had with that person, my vision in life changed. Somehow, my eyes got opened to the fact that my relationship with every people I know could just vanish at any time. My eyes got opened to the fact that every living thing I encounter in my every day of living will not last forever, because we all have a separate fate. None of these living things can spend the rest of my life with me. That got even more real when my mother died. Then one of my friends. Then my two relatives who I used to see every time I go into my mother’s old home (or every time they visit us). I witnessed four funerals in the span of six or seven months. And it sucks! It will forever suck.

I am attached to those people, for like years of my life. I was used to knowing that they are alive and well. Every time I think about this new fact about them, I just… have mixed emotions with a lot of whys and what-ifs. But I still think that they are resting in peace somewhere better than where I am right now, and it just gives me a painful relief. Then for most of the time, I just feel the fear of losing anyone or anything over a second. Because of this fear, I cannot be the person I was before that series of events.

The reason I was living before was them. They loved and cared for me. My mother took care of me, my friend trusted me, and I am sure that my two relatives somehow cared for me. They were my fuel. The people I have were my fuel; I wanted to live because of them. Although I still have my other friends, relatives, and father, I just can’t make them my fuel anymore. I still care for them and I still love them. But the thing is, I can’t just live for them. If I will continue living because of some living things, I will just die or got weaker every time I got separated into any of them.

I knew I needed to discover a fuel that I can have for a lifetime, I just didn’t know what kind of coil, gas, or oil I was looking for. For few months I tried to live because I woke up, and it was dull. It felt like black and white. I still need to study, interact and just blend in with the people I used to be with before, and that kind of fuel worked… terribly. It wasn’t enough to spend in like twelve hours of every single day.

Then, I tried to live for food, streaming sites, books, and anything I can buy. Do you know what I gained? Weight, anxiety, and sure, I lived a life of luxury. But did I find my fuel? Hell, no. I gained a lot of negative stuff. I even lose some of my relationships, and probably some trust, and maybe my chance of love…

I got lost because of something I unexpectedly lose. Then, I won’t find the right fuel if I don’t know what kind of fuel I’m looking for. You can’t fill up a car with a freaking baby oil because its oil and engine oil are like oils, and expect it to work for Pete's sake! So, I decided to be aware of myself. I decided to know myself and what kind of crap I need. After all, I know myself more than anyone in this world. I mean, we all know ourselves more than anything, duh.

I love, love. I believe in it and I know that’s what I need. Everyone needs it. But I can’t just expect a person to give the love that I need, because I’ve been that kind of person before, and it didn’t work. Then it hits me, I need to love myself. I need to accept myself, my imperfections, and everything. I still hate my reflection every time I look into it, so my love for myself is still a work in progress. But I know that I will get there soon.

Survey #342

“in this farewell, there’s no blood, there’s no alibi  /  ‘cuz i’ve drawn regret from the truth of a thousand lies”

What’s your all-time favourite cartoon? Does anime count? In which case I'd say Fullmetal Alchemist, or the original Pokemon. If we're not including anime, then uhhhh Avatar: The Last Airbender, even though I have much more to go in the series. Have you ever taken dance lessons? What kind? Yeah, I've done a few for many years: jazz, clogging, modern, and hip hop. When did you last run and why? I literally couldn't tell you. I don't even know if I can run with the current state of my legs. My knees would probably crumple. Does your house/flat/whatever the hell you live in need cleaning? Not necessarily cleaning, but sorting. I still have boxes outside and inside my room of my stuff I need to put up somewhere... but whenever I prepare to do it, I just get so overwhelmed and shy away from it. Then there's the spare room, that's a total mess loaded with boxes and the like. Mom and I have just avoided it like the plague. Was your last relationship with a man or a woman? Woman. What do you think your next achievement will be? HOPEFULLY getting a job... Do you like mushrooms? NOOOOOOO. What dream do you remember most vividly? I'm not talking about it. Favorite kind of bread? Pumpernickel. Rabbits or hamsters? Rabbits. I've never met a nice hamster, and I just think rabbits are cuter. A movie you’ve never seen that it seems like every one else has? Harry Potter films. Favorite dog breed? I'm biased towards beagles. When was the last time you climbed a tree? Never, actually. Where I live, there aren't really many weighty trees with low branches. Just pine trees. Most common lie you tell? That I'm "fine" when I'm not. Ever seen your parents make out? Jc no, I'll take a hard pass there. Do you put your hair up a lot or down? It's too short to put up. Most of the time do you straighten or curl your hair? Neither. What piercing do you hate? I'm not a fan of cheek dermals at all, but you do you 100%. Were you raised in a religious house? Yes; I was raised Roman Catholic. Do your parents get mad when you're on the computer for hours? Mom used to for many years until I became an adult and she just realized it was in vain. I haven't lived with Dad since I was a teenager, but when my parents were together, he usually didn't say anything. Have you ever been asked for a nude picture? No, thankfully. I'd stop talking to the person immediately. What would you do if your parent hit you? I honestly feel like I'd slap them back and get the fuck out. Or just freeze in shock and cry. What's your most common mood? Stressed but distracted. Do you like poems? Yeah, usually. Ever kissed someone half-naked? Uh yeah. Have you ever been in a parade? No. Do you still play Pokémon? I play Pokemon GO, and I've actually been tempted to get out my DS and play one of the games I have (I can't remember which). I do find Pokemon games to be VERY grind-ey, though, so I can't play them for too long without getting bored. What is your favorite Pokémon? Ninetales. I also really love Espeon, though, and Charmander will always have my heart. Is there an animal you like that most people don't? Bats! :') Is there an animal that you think is overrated in terms of how it's liked? No animal is overrated. Have you ever "quit" a site and came back to it more than once? Uhhhh I don't think so. Do you have an "odd" fascination with anything? Most would probably consider "vulture culture" to be pretty weird, being drawn to dead animals and all... What's the hardest thing you've been through, & what did you learn from it? The breakup with Jason. I learned that some people make promises they aren't afraid to break, that someone can promise "forever" and not mean it, that the most unexpected can just snap their fingers and forget about you... I learned a lot. And most things, not positive. What are three "unrealistic" things you want most? 1.) To be able to financially support myself by just freelance nature photography; 2.) sooo many different kinds of pets; and 3.) to be totally rid of my mental illnesses. Do you take any daily vitamins? No, but I would if I was the one who bought groceries and stuff. I do however take Vitamin D once a week for my legs. Who are three of your favorite fictional characters of all time? JUST THREE??????? FUCK MAN idk. Uhhh well there's of course Darkiplier and Wilford Warfstache, then uhhh probably Pyramid Head. If you had to give the world a pre-existing mythological/fictional being, what would it be? Idk, I'd really need to be more educated on their lore before I made that decision. Do you have any desire to learn (a) foreign language(s)? Which? I both do and don't want to resume learning German. I got very good at it and could have basic conversations, but lack of application has slaughtered my vocabulary. Now it's like, it'd be nice to try again, but for what purpose? I don't think I'll ever actually apply it to my life, so it just seems like it'd be a load of wasted effort. But then on the other hand, I also feel that doing something you simply want to do isn't a waste of time. Idk. What is one of your firmest beliefs? Equality for all. No race, religion, whatthefuckever makes you more or less valuable than someone else. Do you have anything that keeps you from doing something you'd truly enjoy? Oh yes. Depression and anxiety, mostly. Do you work to fix your faults? Or at least, admit to them? I definitely try, and I'll certainly admit to them. How do you hope the world will change, if at all? I just want more compassion, less violence, more understanding... What is/are your view(s) on god, religion, spirituality, or relations to? In short, I believe that something sentient created the universe, and it/they/he/she/what-have-you just... let life play out from there, I think. I like to believe there's a plane of consciousness like an afterlife that exists, but if not, I don't really care. I hope the evil get what was coming to them, and the good get back what they gave, but maybe we're all better off without life after death. We'll all find out one day. Are you arachnophobic or scared of spiders in the least? Some, yes; others, not so much. This is very situational. Do you play WoW? What do you think of it either way? Haha, you're asking an avid player. I enjoy it, but not as much as I used to. At one point I was a Heroic raider, sometimes dabbling in Mythic, but now I'm just mostly a casual mount collector that likes chatting with my guildies and just doing dailies 'n shit. I owe a lot to the game, honestly; it helped me stay occupied throughout the breakup, and still today gives me something to do. What kind of computer do you have? Windows 7/Vista/XP/Other? I have an Acer Nitro with Windows 10. Are you taking any interesting classes in school/do you not attend? I'm no longer in school. If you don't attend, are you taking any "lessons" for anything? No, but I would like to join a photography course somewhere. A book/piece that has had an exceptional impact on your life? Johnny Got His Gun by Dalton Trumbo just made me hate war more than I innately did. What genres of music are your favorite? Just metal as an umbrella term. Some heavy stuff, some less, some in the middle, some leaning towards other genres... but I just like metal. Do you think that fate plays a part in people's lives? No. Wouldn't "fate" just make it all... worthless? Like we're just storybook characters with a predetermined ending? What are your opinions on the media? One word: manipulative. What's a piece of technology you'd like to own? I REALLY want a PS4, especially lately. There's just a lot of games I REALLY want to play. Are you afraid of technology developing to where we're too reliant on it? We're already *too* reliant on it, which I do believe is a bad thing. I know, absolutely hysterical for me to be talking. What's your favorite odd ice cream flavor? I don't think I've ever had a truly odd ice cream flavor. There's this local place though that makes a kind that tastes JUST like s'mores, and I can fucking murder a cup of that. What's your opinion on stereotypes/labels? They're limiting and devalue uniqueness, imo. I know very, very few people who totally fit a certain stereotype, so why even bother. Like I don't care if you use them as adjectives to some extent, just don't put too much weight on them. Just be you. Do you believe that history repeats itself? It's not necessarily doomed to, but it happens sometimes, obviously. Would you rather learn from your mistakes or just undo them? Depends on the mistake. What was the most interesting class you had in school? Probably Mythology in high school. Do you write? If so, what? Yeah, meerkat role-play. And every now and again, poetry. Do you have a favorite culture? No; I'm not educated on nearly enough to pick one. Do you believe in global warming? Have you researched it? Lol no shit I do. I don't exactly think it takes much research to see with your own two eyes that it's factual. Do you prefer piercings or tattoos? Tattoos, if I had to pick. What comedy movie is your favorite? White Chicks. Have you ever meditated? Yes. Doesn't work for me. What comes to mind when you think of a great moment in your life? Realizing it was my choice to liberate myself and my happiness from my ex. He didn't and never should've carried it, because that's my right. What do you like about springtime? Aaaaall the flowers. <3 How have you handled having to stay in? It's not really different from my average day, so... How would your friends describe you? Quiet and overthinks literally everything. Have you ever hallucinated? When I was coming off a certain med in middle school, I saw black moving shadows. What (or who) is the best thing that ever happened to you? The partial hospitalization program I attended for two months following my suicide attempt. It's where I met my psychiatrist, who set my medication straight. Medicine besides though, I learned so many coping techniques and just how to deconstruct my trauma. As well as possible, anyway. What is the worst decision you ever made? Handing over the ability to make happiness for myself to another person. What is your favorite arcade game? Don't have one. Do you feel neglected? No. What school subject(s) are/were your best? English, Arts, Science. Are you allergic to pollen? Yep. What style of wedding dress do you like best? Probably ballgown. Are you over your first love? I probably never will be in complete totality. Do you always answer your phone? No. I only ever do if I recognize the number. Who was the last person you know to have a birthday? Today is actually my sister's birthday. What song is currently stuck in your head? I have Halocene's cover of "What I've Done" on a loop right now. It has me absolutely covered in goosebumps. Do you ever use coloring books? Not really anymore. Do you personally know anyone who is an author? Not to my knowledge, no. What’s your favorite kind of salsa/dip to go with tortilla chips? Just your normal, mildly hot salsa. Do you wash your car by hand or drive through a car wash? Mom's car hasn't been washed in... well, years, given its bumper. Mom worries that in a car wash, it'll be broken off (it is literally held on with a lot of zip ties and duct tape), and we ourselves don't want to wash it, so... Do you have any uncommon kitchen appliances, such as espresso machines, waffle irons, etc? I know we have one or two, but idk what they're called. What did your parents major/minor in in college, if they went? Dad never went to college. Mom changed her major a few times, but her latest was social work, I believe. Has either of their careers influenced what career you chose or want to pursue? Not at all. What kind of natural disaster is most common where you live? Hurricanes. Why is your least favorite season your least favorite? Because it's hot as fuck and humid. Have you ever had an animal get into your attic? No. When was the last time you started a “new chapter” of your life? I don't know. Hopefully I'll start one soon when I leave PHP and pursue a job... What room in your home do you spend the least amount of time in? I'm always in my room. Do you do anything to reduce the amount of electricity you use? I feel awful admitting I do quite the opposite... Being in the dark during the day affects my depression, so I'll have my lamp (or both) on even if it's just sort of shaded inside. Are you usually open to trying a new food that you aren’t familiar with? Eh, it depends on the food. I'm not very adventurous with foods though. Do you listen to Panic! At The Disco? I do. Have you ever had a kinky dream about a celebrity? ... It wasn't "kinky," but it was a dream lmao. Has anyone ever told you that they loved you, and you couldn’t say it back? That's how I ended the whole Joel childishness. Which friend do you confide in most? My mom. Do you wear a cross? No. What is your favorite doughnut? That's so hard. :( Krispy Kreme's normal glazed though probably takes the cake. I also love chocolate frosted and just totally plain, though. Do you have a hot tub? If so, where is it located? No. Did you read the Twilight series, or jump on the bandwagon after the movie? Neither. Do you or your parents rake your yard? Dad did growing up. Now nobody does or needs to. Who did you last go to the movies with? Dad, I think? What color was the last vehicle you were in? White. Do you have any family members in the military right now? No. Is there a ceiling fan in the room you’re in? Yeah. Have you ever heard voices? No. If you’re not straight, who was the first person you came out to? Sara. Do you remember the first time your first crush ever said hi to you? No. Do you ever go places with wet hair? Yeah, idc. Who is your favorite little girl? My nieces. What do you want the most in life? To feel like I made a difference, even a tiny one. If you could have anyone’s singing voice, whose would you choose? OBVIOUSLY Amy Lee's. What’s the most expensive thing you’ve bought that turned out to be a waste of money? *shrug* What’s something you’ve bought that turned out to be way more useful than you anticipated? Hm. Have you ever been on a ship? No. Would you ever date a disabled person? (Be honest) Yes. Would you rather adopt or have your own child? IF I wanted kids, which I absolutely do not, I'd rather have my own. I know I'd feel a deeper connection. What would you class as cheating on someone? As soon as you do/say something you don't want your s/o to know about, you're cheating. As far as earrings go, would you rather wear hoops or studs? Studs. Do you recycle? Yes. If someone dislikes you, what is most likely to be the reason? People have thought I don't try hard enough before. Do you put a line through your "7"s? Yes. ^ What about your "Z"s? Yes. What are you most known for? My art "skill," at least irl. How do you feel about shameless self-promoting? Depends on when, where, and how. As someone who's trying to be a freelance photographer, I get that it's sadly necessary, but there are some places it's just uncalled for.

Welcome to 2021

Ver. 2.1 - Ok. February but still, here we are. “Behold it’s me” as Logic would say. [...] I’m sorry I’m a bit shook because I started to write at 10:01AM, and it’s precisely 12:07AM, I was progressing pretty well in the process of writting and then I made a bad move and lost everything I wrote. I’m kinda mad. Really, I was this 👌 close to give up on writting it, and you can notice that the pixels are touching. But I guess the “I said I’d do it, so I’m going to do it” mentality is taking me places, once again. Even if I have to start again (that's called mental strength, take notes). And I said I’d write it baked so here I am, baked and hella motivated to do it. So, W shouldn’t help me reminding me what I wrote in the first version but nevermind. So I guess I'll put the most things I remember. I can tell there were good ideas ! I'll take this occasion to remind everyone the concept of these posts but first we will recap numbers of this year (well, more or less accurate for 2020 as I'm writting one month late) (and I'll fucking stop writting on the tumblr site and switch to OpenOffice so my next words are not lost again). 637 Nakamas (thank y'all for being here, even if I post 12847 times in a row. You're the best). 3609 posts and 23 376 likes. (109 drafts : lol it's less than a few weeks ago)

Pic : Plot twist 2. No more smile, but the return of the bowtie. (aka « The 4 days late suit » aka « I'm old enough to know better »)

The choice of this picture was so simple. Or maybe I should have chosen the one with the mustache only I took during lockdown ? Ahah. But … this picture could almost resume the year on its own. If I'd describe it in depth and explain the context, I could review 70% of the events that happened this year (and I think I'll go for that later, interesting exercise).

So. First let me explain the goal of these sums up. Each « Welcome to XXXX » is a resume, a sum up of the year XXXX-1. I write these for me, it's a funny way to keep track of all these years. I try to describe more or less precisely what happened during the year. I allow myself to be more or less precise because I firstly write these for me. And sometimes these posts tend to be long. Especially this one. It's gonna be sooo long. Like, idk maybe highlight this line and take a few seconds to scroll down and see how looooong it is. Kinda discouraging isn't it ? Lucky you it won't go on forever though as today, as I'm writting that it's 12:23PM and I'll have to be gone at 4 or 5PM. But I think contraints make art, even if I don't like to write under any kind of pressure. But I'm determined to do it in one take. So in these posts I also write about the TV Shows, manga, anime, movies I've seen/read. Even books, as I finally had the chance to read « Le Petit Prince » this year. We all know we had time this year, don't we ? And at the end, I post a 12 songs playlist (+ songs that I discovered this year that also are going to remind me of the year). We can roughly say it's « 1 song/1 month » but it's not always true. These songs are songs I like a lot, like really (but not necessarily my favorite) but above all, they remind me of the year I'm resuming (it can also be older songs). I also post my top 3 albums of the year. I'm thinking also of detailing my choices of playlist. Maybe not explaining all of them but a few. [12:36PM. And I'm already hungry.] On the 1st try I remember I talked about the TV shows I saw. I forgot to mention it but I write in English for a few reasons. First is : it helps me exercising my English. For me, it's the most beautiful langage to talk and it's a good occasion to do so. And then I actually enjoy writting in English. And it prevents unwanted people who don't master English to read all that (as it is pretty intimate). But joke's on me, I'm conscious the people I'd like to keep away from reading this all master English, and even better than me for some of them. (It surely is the case for 27 at least, even though we all know she still won't read this lol). Yes, I never drop names in these sum ups. Or at least, some names are blacklisted. I always chose a number to nominate them they would normally recognize themselves. So, talking about English, I've seen « Emily in Paris » on Netflix. It may surprize you but I'm very interested in dubbing. French dubbing is amazing. For example I bought « Spiderman » on PS4 this year and the french voice is the same voice actor as in the « Amazing Spider-Man » (yes the one with Andrew Garfield). (UNPOPULAR OPINION : Andrew Garfield actually is the best spiderman. Or at least the one I prefer and by far). Emily in Paris is funny because I watched it in English and it kinda disturbed me that it took place in Paris but everybody spoke English. On the other hand, if you watch it in French, langages people are talking become logical (French people speak french) but you'll have to deal with the DEADLY ANNOYING French voice of Emily. And her accent. I think I just watched 1 or 2 episodes like that, I couldn't take more ?. If you have time you should take 5 seconds to listen to what I'm talking about. But it was quite a good show. It was so fun to see these streets I've been visiting for so long in a Netflix show. By the way, I think it's easy to say that I'm missing Paris so much. But not only for the tourism, but most and foremost for the competitions. Before being a tourist I was a competitor there. So, I'm missing Paris but I'm also missing karate competitions. And also just karate. I haven't stepped on a tatami for 3 weeks and it still seems like it won't get better, and we all know why. I'm curious if I could talk about this year without mentioning a very famous virus but I think it's just impossible. But this virus gave me a lot of time in March and April. Maybe less in November tho. I could finally finish The Walking Dead, which last seasons were surprisingly good. And it was so fun to watch the reactions of people on Youtube [#]. Talking about karate competitions, I also watched Cobra Kai ! What an amazing job they did there. Adding more depth to the first movie, it's funny to change perspective and see that the Daniel we were rooting for wasn't that much of a « perfect good guy » we saw (I'm not talking about the kick in the face etc). It's also funny to notice I kinda went fro Daniel to Johnny lol. But having a Netflix show talking about martial arts and value they teach to their students ? It was perfect, even more when you see that some of my students also saw it so when we were training I was refering to it they almost all got it. And it's also funny to see that it's not as Manichean as the 1st movie was. It's a 9/10 for me. If I read the last sum up right, I said : « This year 2020 I really need to watch Kimetsu no yaiba, Jojo, Violet evergarden, Gintama and i have to keep ready 7 deadly sins. » So : Kimetsu no Yaiba was dope. The anime was beautiful and the manga was very entertaining. Not a top tier manga but definitively a good one. Jojo's anime was cool but too long. I stopped after season 2 or 3 I guess ? Violet Evergarden was TRASH (and very bad for a date, if you ask me) and I didn't take time to explore the 2 others. I also saw : Assassination classroom (5/10, i couldn't finish it so i skipped directly to the last episode, was as moving as people said), Validé (8/10, with an insane final episode), No Game No Life (8,5/10, i loved it), Freaks and Geeks (7,5 but i didn't finish it, I really like the old school vibe), Code geass (7/10, great anime and great opening). I finally discovered Community and it was worth it. What a funny show. And what a pleasure to see Mr Donald Glover on screen. Makes me think that I need to watch Atlanta again. The problem with Community is the last seasons broke the 4th wall too much for me, it became painful to watch. But the 3 or 4 seasons are crazy. Another show that was even more funny : IT Crowd. I finally had the chance to see the episode of « I came here to drink milk and kick ass, and I just finished my milk ». This show is a 9,25/10. Grand Army was also a great show of 2020. Dom is an amazing character (but I already said it). Kengan Ashura was also so cool ! I think it's what Baki would have liked to become. This year I also started to watch « American horror Story » again (alone and not alone). These last seasons were awesome. I also converted Elodi to «my hero academia », it was so cool to share that. Other things I saw : SAO S4 (AMAZING, SO BEAUTIFUL), Erased, SNK Last season) ; The Mandalorian, 24's 9th season.« Queen's gambit » have been one of the greatest show I've seen this year. And I really want to say that I played chess before the show came out (add me on Lichess if you want to play with me. Same username. I'm not strong -about 1000 ELO I guess- but I'm always happy to play and learn). If you want a precise idea of my level, on the chess.com app, I can beat Emir 🇹🇷 (1000 ELO) often but I didn't win once against Sven 🇸🇰 (who is ~1100 ELO). I'm so happy talking about all these lengthen the post even more. Kinda satisfying. But I could also talk about Tekken and chess this year. I think I have a thing with dueling sports. I'm a Karate competitor, I love Tekken and I like chess. I guess someone has something to prove haha. But come on, chess is incredible. For the 1st lockdown, I was just playing (not alone) but I wanted to make progress just by practicing. And that's how I got BB 5 or 7 (yes, it means Beat By = my number of loss in a row). But at the end of the 2nd lockdown I finally allowed myself to study a little more, thanks to Youtube (once again). This is SO INTERESTING. Like the strategies, the top players. French content creators are fun but I like american ones more. Eric Rosen is my favourite. He's always calm, he often finds solutions. GothamChess is also very entertaining. You can say by how he talks he has been a teacher. He's great. So, once again on some shonen shit, I started studying more. Mid December, a kid beat me 2 times in a row. He's a smart kid, I like him. He didn't brag or anything. And then, during Christmas Holidays I spent 2 or 3 hours a day watching chess videos. I guess he hasn't been able to beat me since then haha. By the way I should play with him later on today. Playing chess is a way for me to make sure my brain doesn't let me down, like gym for the brain. At least, it's what I thought when I started but I quickly discovered that it's a game of patterns recognizing, so memory is really challenged here. I mean, in the middlegame you have to be smart to get by but at the beginning and ending … you have to know your openings. I have also thought of joining a club but I don't know if chess communities are benevolent. I also noticed that high ranked players seem to have strong personalities. And then for Tekken (yes, 3 years and a half later I'm still on this game) I'm still making progress. In March, someone made me want to play Heihachi. What a funny character. Not top tier, but fun. Leroy Smith is also fun to play. There was no offline tournament but I won one, the 1st organized by Tekken Toulouse and finished 5th at the second. It's funny to live that level of stress straight from my bed. Usually, that kind of stress making my whole body trembling is usually found nearby tatamis of Karate competitons. (Yes, these Tekken tournaments make me stressful and that's the reason I can't play Jin in tournaments). But Eddy is still a sure value. Still progressing in movement, and whiff punishing. Mishimas are getting more consistent on electrics but it's not perfect. By the way, if you love fighting games and Bruce Lee, there's a video you need to see (whoever you are) : [#]. If you're really interested in these topics, you should appreciate this video as much as I did [2:10 PM. I have eaten, but now I have the feeling that I'm late.] Btw I don't skip line to add some « length » effect. Once again I'm sorry if making it until here was painful to read, but I need to make this paragraph the least attractive I can. This line I'm writting is almost on the 3rd page of OpenOffice. And I try to avoid using emojis, so there's just text. Tout dans le fond, pas de forme. Also, congratulations for making it until here, you must be very motivated. I'm writting slowly because it's the 1st time I write this by daytime, and I swear at the begining people were harassing me ahah. It's fun because the sum up of 2019 was so short. Just with its form, you can tell how 2019 have been peaceful. I don't remember if I talked about it already but a disaster could have happened in September/October 2019. But karate kept my mind busy so the worst have been avoided. Time spent on the tatamis kept me away from overthinking about my problems. And that was a good strategy indeed. Because in 2020 it wasn't the same. If we count right. Dojos were opened in January, February, 1st half of march, reopened in September and october, closed on november and opened in December (Mon Dieu quel … CASSE-TEX hahaha merci c'est tout pour moi). It was a weird karate year. Today is the 1 year anniversary of my last competition. During the 1st lockdown, I had litteraly no desire to train. Some of you know why. But let's talk a bit more about COVID and lockdowns. The most important thing is that I didn't spent the 1st lonely. This was the most challenging time of my life, but I can say that I made it thanks to 0808 so I'm eternally grateful for that. So, if we recap months by months : January was a funny month. One thing that I thought a miracle happened (until I found out months later what a real miracle was). I also almost went into a brawl. I guess this weird ass month set the tone for the 11 months to follow. February … was one of the calmest month. I had an awesome dojo session in Balma with 0808 in February. I think there were a lot of beautiful sunsets this month. Guess our weather power was at its peak. These 3 1st months of 2020 had a lot of trainings, even if I was injured due to kumite. March and April are kinda the same for me. I won't talking long about these but I'd simply say that I'm glad that I hadn't to write to 27. So, the Miracle happened by mid April. Mid april to mid may, it was cool. We were at home but … the weather was nice, I was doing sport everyday (but no real karate trainings) and I could keep this rythm of exercising until … Half July, which is good. It's the first time in my life I'm that consistent in doing sports at home. From mid may, I started to train with Coach O. on a weekly basis. It was incredible. These days were still bliss in my mind. I was there, no « real problems » in mind, I wasn't alone, I was making progress physically … It was really great. And from mi may to end of July, it kept getting better.Indeed, I fell in love again in January and it was getting stronger by the months. It's been a while I haven't fell this hard for someone. But she gave it back to me nicely. And then … Mala suerte 3.0. This point of the sum up is funny because I do remember when I talked about mala suerte in the other sum ups. I do realize how it's always the same thing when I write those : « 1st part of the year is cool, then not cool, then cool again but in a weird way because I have insane difficulties to repair broken parts of me » but hey. This time it's not my fault. It makes me realize how cyclic all this is. So, August, September and October have been terrible and chaotic months. A level of sadness rarely reached until there. Maybe comparable to September 2018. A high level of anger also. But still, with rare occasions to train, so no occasions to let go off steam. In fact, let's talk a bit about this anger. I've always took a lot of pride in the fact that I could most of the time remain calm in a lot of situations. Plus, being patient isn't something natural but … I learned to be through the years. I was so surprised to notice how angry I became … It simply wasn't me. But the reason is simple : I really think karate brings me balance in life, on a lot of levels (and it concerns me a lot for when I'll stop competing one day …). But I realized it so I'm working on it. In 2020, I led a lot of fights, sometimes I won and often I lost, but I also avoided a lot of them. One of the reasons I think I'm not ready to be a good partner is first I think I'm too angry. I don't think I could be mean to my partner but … I think I could be annoying to deal with. But mainly, I'm not ready to better myself now. To find the good partner, you need to become a good partner first, and this is precisely what I'm not ready to become. Despite being not perfect, I'm fine that way and I know how far from perfect I'm right now. But nevermind. This is the kind of state of mind you can't afford when you're in a relationship. I'm not saying you need to change to fit your partner's ideals. But if you notice something's wrong in your behaviour/habits and don't want to correct it, you might be a bad partner (but I could be wrong, I'm not a couple therapist lol).

Oh. And that's the moment I can describe my photo to tell the story differently. So this shot was taken precisely on Sunday, 4th of October. 1302 got confirmed so we had to go to the Temple du Salin. I went there with my father and he decided to rock a bowtie so I wanted to match him. It was so fun. That was the first time we stepped in a church after « all these events ». It was a strong moment for me. So, this picture (taken by me, thank you tripod) was taken 4 days after I « took a gamble ». I took a lot of gambles this year. One memorable gamble that lead to beautiful pictures of Toulouse was on August 27th (lol). This was after our breakup. I gave her an adress and an hour, and I hopped she would come. She never came so this was a lost gamble. (So I had a great time watching « Back to the future » outdoors, on a big movie screen, but I was alone). But this time was different. I did suppose she would be at one place on a certain day at the end of September. And I gambled right because she was there. And even if the context was so particular, I can tell we had a great time. I was so ready that I put on my best white shirt, because I knew she kinda liked it. I was there to win her back but I simply failed. Guess the shirt wasn't enough. So it was funny to wear the full suit 4 days later, I was like « Dude, nice effort but it's too late  lol» (plus the Temple du Salin is on the other side of the closest bridge from her home) but I still hopped to cross her road on that day. Oh and as we're analyzing this picture, I really like the bokeh on the autmun-colored leaves. I had the luck to have a very sweet light when I took these pictures. And the post processing was really funny. I have a lot of versions of this picture indeed. But all these colors in the background always make me think of a quote I love :  « Autumn shows us how beautiful it is to let things go » and this quote is so damn right. I discovered this year that I have difficulties to let things go. The thing is I hate injustice. I hate to see things that litteraly belong to me, things I deserve, simply run away from me. Sometimes I'm telling myself it's just my karma making me pay for all the شيطان I've done in the past. But other times I just try to convince myself to let go. It's been the 2nd most challenging thing this year. These levels of depression have never been reached before. But still, here I am. But not stronger than before. I had this conversation a few weeks ago about « what doesn't kill you makes you stronger ». To support this idea, some people might evoke the principle of « Kintsugi » as an example. But I strongly disagree about the first statement. I'm not a goddamn bowl. I take the example of my lower belly scar : it didn't kill me but it didn't get stronger either. That's the exact opposite indeed. Sometimes it still hurts even though it's been done 12 years ago (the last time it hurt was this night, almost stopping me from finding sleep). It's a personal opinion but what didn't kill me made me weaker. And I'm not just talking about physical injuries. Losing the ability to trust after all these events isn't what I'd call « getting stronger », even though « I didn't do anything wrong ». That's an expensive price. Bref. I think you can overcompensate with something else but the damaged parts may stay weak after. [3:03 PM. So I have about 1 hour to finish it. Easy.] There's one thing I wanted to talk about in this sum up, related to the fact of « being strong ». I read Blach again (you can tell by my december posts) and I started with the lost agent arc, followed by the TYBW arc. There's 2 things about it : its poetry, through the words and the drawings will always amaze me (it amazed me even if it’s the 2nd time I’me reading it), and the 2nd thing : I love how Ichigo become stronger. He lost his Shinigami powers but then found his Fullbring powers. And that is very important because he becomes strong again, but it's a different kind of strong and I LOVE THIS. It's like in real life. I was very strong in June 2012 (videos as proof), but it's not the same strong as in July 2017 or April/November 2018. June and July 2020 have been a different kind of strong. Not that I gained 10 kgs in 2 months (unfortunately) but I was exercising daily. I was getting my body ready for the supposed heavenly month of August that was awaiting me (us). Unfortunately there was no videos of karate at this period (but I made some in september!) but I was feeling great physically. In fact. This May/June/July 2020 period could be considered as “bliss” for me. Of course there was some background problems but ... Mentally I was getting back on my feet, I was deeply in love, physically pretty feeling myself. Plus on the 1st half of July i could go back to the tatamis ... I swear this level of peace and life appreciation have rarely been reached before. Well, this concept of getting stronger differently is almost obsessing me for a simple reason : I'm feeling like I'm getting older. 27 is a weird age for competing in karate. If I look back, I realize I'm older than William when he stopped (it's his birthday tomorrow!!). Also older than Zak, Teddy and so on. I guess I'll never be physically like 10 or 5 years ago but I'm really asking myself if I can be better. But as seen as the pains I go through after the trainings … It's going to be complicated. Plus I did my body wrong this year. There was pain in mars, april, august, september, october, november and december. I tried a lot of things to make it go. I tried to smoke it, i tried to sleep it, i tried to drink it also. I tried to fuck it of course but none of these things worked. But can we consider I won if only my cock still works ? Compared to 2018 : yes it is a win. And at least when I'm with someone, that makes less time crying and overthinking shit. Anyway, I also tried to smoke it really hard. And that's an habit I'll have trouble to let go but nvmd. Still, one of my 2021 resolutions is to smoke less. Also, I took a funny resolution that is : « I'm not accepting defeat this year ». And I realized only a few days after taking it how hard it will be. I'm not dumb, when defeat is unavoidable, I'll just take it. But I decided to be a real Scorpio and be more stubborn than ever. We can say it's above all pride. Same pride as Vegeta, Bakugo or even Endeavour. Really touched me when Bakugo talked about « Absolute victory ». Sometimes I find myself too soft. I'm not going to become an awful person (or at least, not more awful than I am right now). I'll still be kind … But I'll go get the victories I deserve a little harder. Talking about my age, I'm a bit deceived I have no close old friends to share the memories. Every one is kinda gone. Sometimes it's my fault, and sometimes it's just people who are shit but life's like this. Also, every year I try to think of my best encounter of the year. It's kinda hard because sometimes, you meet someone a few years earlier but you really get to know each other later etc … So I'm not clear if this should count only people met this year or simply the people I've spent the best times with. Because I received a curious message this summer and my God. What a luck she took the chance to write me. We realized a few days ago we were in the same class in 10th grade (2nde) (we saw the class picture, what a laughter we had). We get along so well. And it's the proof that 2nd chances deserve to be given. I swear that I also lost some important people this year. But I'm not fighting to get people back anymore. I've done it too much and I'm simply done. People need to realize it's a luck to be in my life. I have my ways but you'll hardly find a friend that's patient and kind as I am. But nevermind, it always makes more time and attention for the people who are here, who really care for my hapiness. Focusing on the people who are here was one of the main concern this year, for a lot of reasons. I thought I was good for selecting the good people in my life but looks like I still can improve. So I'm still letting people go off my life. [3:36PM. Guess I said mostly what I had to say. Maybe 5 pages is enough, but maybe not.] Oh I can still tell the rest of the year. November have been one peaceful month. Away from all the obsessions. Focused on me. No karate but still courses by videoconference. The weather was very sweet even tho it was November. This second lockdown was not that funny but we've seen worst. And December … had it's ups and downs. It was cool to meet my kids 1 month after all these video courses. They clearly got stronger, it was cool. I could also talk about my experience as a sensei this year because there's a lot to say. At the beginning of February, it was my last competition but also for my kids. We litteraly took the competition by storm. On était TROP CHAUDS. But then the Covid stopped us. We kinda were ready for Occitanie championship, if you forget that I was sick the week before the competition. I'd have loved so much to see how far their training would have taken them on this competition. But thank God they cancelled it, guess He didn't want to see me lose ahah. So, I've seen a lot of kids getting better. What a pleasure. Later on this year I told them that I wanted to see them become stronger than me. Seems cliché, but I'm happy they took it seriously. Of course I'm dead serious. We also talked about I will be waiting for them in Senior. Hope they'll continue until then. And above all I hope I will still be competing. I really want to have a positive impact on these kids, competitors or not. And I guess it's working. (Btw I'll surely do a post about Whitebeard soon, just to show him love). So. What lessons can we draw from this chaotic year ? Always treat your high school comrades well. Be picky about who you let in your life. Before engaging in a relationship, ask why her previous relationship ended. Trust no B. (And BBW's are heaven sent). Now it's 3:50PM and I guess I'm done. But I keep myself the possibility to add things if I think of things to add. It's 6 pages long (Arial, 12) but if I can make it longer I will.

[Friday. 00:55AM] Edit : Ok. The story is funny. I really wanted to finish that in one day. So I wrote the previous lines between 10 AM and 4 PM Wednesday knowing I would need more time, just to check and to add a few more details. And one of those Lonely Wednesday Night would have been perfect just to finish the job. So I planned to finish it on wednesday night but the fact is I forgot my computer home …. So here I am one day later. Still baked, so still in the right state of mind to do it. It gave me time to proofread myself (?) and most importantly, it gave me time to read again some of my previous sum ups. It was interesting to compare how they're all different, and also how my writting evolved. Tbh I think I'm becoming more comfortable with my English. Or maybe the more I express myself, the more I look at ease with the langage. This sum up is the longest I've ever written. But still, I'll add things because I still haven't told everything. For example, I haven't spoken about the fact that all the Kazamastar adventure might be closer to the end than the beginning. Like, I'm not immediatly done with all that. I'm still having a lot of fun here. Anon visitors are also part of the game, but it's still all fun. It also keeps my « photograph eye » opened. This makes me think of the quote «I want to be so awfully happy that I never need to write poetry again. » [#] and more precisely I'm thinking about : do I post more when I'm happy or sad ? But I noticed this tumblr kinda works like therapy for me. (And especially, this post is a therapy by itself. Wednesday I woke up feeling bad, lower belly aching and making this post really helped me going through the day.) I post a lot when I'm sad but it really allows me to get all of these negative feelings out of me. I do stylize things but I know I'm not a poet or anything. But can you imagine being so happy that you don't write again ? Would be an amazing feeling. (Indeed, I've already done it once [#]. I've ended a blog on a perfect happiness and yes it felt amazing. ) Imagine if I do it here. After all the trials and tribulations I went through, it would be a perfect way to finish this tumblr. But as I'm speaking, I think there's like … less than 5% chance that it ends happily. If it does, it could be in a long time. I have a few ideas of when and how it could end, but Imma have to keep these selfishly for myself. You'll see when we'll get there.:) Also, I'm realizing right now the things I'm adding to the text make the timestamps through the text a bit less accurate but that's just a detail. [2:37 AM] Earlier I talked about this blog being a therapy for me. But it’s not only this tumblr. This year I proudly finished another tumblr (yes you can guess I was proud as I posted about that 17325 times already and pinned a post). This was such a relief to end it after letting it still for litteraly 2 years. Well that’s it for tonight !

No transition : let's go for the explanations of my choices for the playlist followed by the playlist itself. It's kinda easy to understand why « la mienne » is here, for the first month. This “I can’t touch you I’m not allowed to” really made me think of someone and this someone came back. Incredible. The next song with a Boogie is perfect for February. Very peaceful month, really full of very good moments (in the backseat of a certain car for example). The 2 next songs are for March. These are kinda « lockdown anthems » as The Weeknd album came out right at that time and so did Laylow's. Plus « Escape from LA » have the vibe I really love from Abel. 2 next songs are for April. Dsvn really smashed when he put that « A muse in her feelings » album. (and the « Amusing her feelings » is even better but that won't happen before January 2021). The sequence between « Outlandish – Keep it going - flawless » was one of the best thing I heard musically this year. But keep it going is insane. « Meilleurs » from Oboy is … special. And so are the 2 following songs. Meilleurs is now blacklisted but it's still one good song. But I can't listen to it anymore. Maybe that's exactly because it reminds me June and July. Count me in reminds me precisely of August 8th. Btw what a funny day, very far from all expectations we built up through the years (let's remind that the countdown started with more that 400 days, but I guess patience and loyalty is not always rewarded). I might digress from the playlist one second, but on this day we were in Treilles with the guys, and thank God I had them in this moment ... That’s when I drank to heal, with “count on me” for soundtrack. For September, I hesitated between « DEUX TOILES DE MER » or « MEVTR » (which means « Meilleur d'Entre Vous Tous Reunis », the 1st stage name of Damso). Damso’s flow on MEVTR is huge. He makes a whole verse rhyme and on but … 2 toiles is more iconic. Talking about iconic, « Bande organisée » wasn't a masterpiece but a force to be reckoned with (i find this expression funny ahah). I mean, in hip hop nowadays we don't see often rappers teaming up with big groups like that. Plus on this song particularly some of them have interesing flows and a lot of energy. And you can tell it comes from the South. Not of them are goods, some are excellent but this makes a very decent track. « Route 66 » was cool, even tough it's for November (so 2nd lockdown) it gave me really lovely vibes. And I take this occasion talking about November 2020 to remind it was the 10th anniversary of Kanye West's MBDTF and I celebrated it the right way héhé. Finally, this featuring is really ending the year well. Dinos dropped an insane album, his best since a long time and Tayc also (respectively « Stamina, » and « Fleur froide »). So having them on the same track was risky but it paid very well, incredible vibe from those two combined. They could have been in the top 3 albums but some people made better than them. Trinity is my top 1 one 2020. The concept, the musics … it was INSANE. QALF was also great. It's insane to see Damso get rid of « artistic barriers » to focus only on sound and music. No communication etc … Just music. And Eternal Atake from Lil Uzi Vert because it was long awaited but also because it was perfect, also a 1st lockdown album so it helped me forget my loneliness but so much good tracks ! And finally we have the very special songs that I coudn't tell why I like them. I just love their vibes. So now is 4:15 PM and I'm offically finished but I still have to tweak it. Know I won't hesitate to add things that are related to 2020 and that come to my mind :) Thanks for reading me. Have a lovely day, or night.

2020 Playlist

Tayc – La mienne (Accoustic)

A Boogie – Reply feat Lil Uzi Vert

The Weeknd – Escape for LA

Laylow – Nakré

dvsn – Keep it goin ✨

PartyNextDoor – Believe it feat Rihanna

Trippie Redd & Russ – The Way

OBOY - Meilleurs

Kehlani - Serial Lover

Juice WRLD & Marshmello - Come and go

THEY. - Count me in

Damso - Deux toiles de mer

13 Organisé - Bande organisée

Joe Dwet File - Route 66

Dinos & Tayc - Je wanda

Spécial : Lil Tecca - Last Call  YNW Melly  - City girls

Jessame - Times we had ~ Dennis Lloyd - Never go back ~  Elliot Trent - computer love

3 top albums de 2020 : 

Trinity de Laylow - Qalf de Damso - Eternal atake de Lil Uzi vert

im supposed to be working on uh literally anything else but instead i gotta get this outta my brain

tl;dr: slag is causing the Psychos to spread across the galaxy bc the Calypsos are using it to both brainwash their cultists and give them ‘special powers’. i mean, its not just slag, it’s eridian ruins/tech, too, but the Twins are utilizing slag the most. which explains the slagfalls and also the processed eridium everywhere still. im hoping sirens will help us cure this- starting with Krieg because slag/Psychos have some sort of connection to the other dimension, just like Sirens, but more messy. also this insanity from the slag/Psycho-ness is literally Mayhem and us fans are taking part in it- we’re the cult irl. plus, this game is gonna be about love and the relationships we have with the people we care about and that’s all the roses mean because i’m feeling s o f t tonight. tomorning. whatever maaaaan

“… among their fractured ramblings, it is tempting to try and find a deeper meaning…”

“[their madness] defies attempts at explanation or containment. from an isolated region of a single planet, to a nearby moon, to systems throughout every human colony, madness is catching…”

you can’t tell me this isn’t just BEGGING for us to figure it out

so, for my own sake:

i have a theory.

i kinda sorta hinted at this with my destroyer theory but i REALLY wanna go all out in this because i think this is actually something to think about… mostly because ive seen A Scene… and i wants to talk about it, vh. i wants it

now im gonna `lol` ignore everything about my lost legion eternal theory and start entirely from scratch. it’s also 1am here for my apologies if this comes across as incoherent because wow i should be asleep but fuck it i got research to do

so it all starts with psychos. i mean i guess it does. it’s gotta right? i brought in pictures it must

anyway

the guide admits that the first psychos came from Dahl’s prison colonies

the ones abandoned on pandora, now ive kinda talked about this b4 but imma talk about it again bc uhhh fuck it? why not.

so we know a lot of the bandits left on Pandora mutated because of the eridian ruins/the key. this is referenced mostly in sledge’s mine

its like world-wise called headstone mine but i never remember that. SLEDGE’S MINE

notice that line “most went crazy and many were physically mutated as well”

so i think it’s safe to say whatever they found in there started causing psychos to appear on pandora

im saying that i think eridians are the cause of Psychos across the galaxy

i have a lot more proof for this so please sit back and enjoy the ride because i think its really really cool

so lets look at hector’s logs from the newest dlc

“one of my boys found a shiny alien trinket”

“a few boys went rabid already, had to put them down”

now idk if there’s a connection here, but it’s interesting that both times, people who found these eridian artifacts started going crazy soon after

shit i mean even tannis begins to go off the wall after her and her dig team start investigating the eridian sites. although if that is because of the horrific incidents that befell her and her team or the ruins idk for certain. i’d bet its the shitty incidents tho

there’s more to this, hang on…

alright, so, lab rats? they’re pretty cool right?

we all like lab rats! personally, chase is my favorite, but adam is hilarious. that final season, huh? pretty wicked… wasn’t really a fan of the island setting but you know what, to each their own. it’s cool they actually progressed the show instead of staying stagnant. that got my respect even if it moved in a direction that wasn’t my cup of tea.

anyway Q U O T E S:

“Hyperion opened my eyes. i didn’t want it!”

“needles in my eyes!”

“don’t you look at me!”

“i can see! i don’t want to see!”

so there’s obviously something ~fucky~ going on with the lab rats and whatever it is they can see from the hyperion experimentation. we know hyperion had a hard-on for slag experimentation and you know i wouldn’t even be shocked if they were injecting these rats’ eyes with slag.

the best part is their reactions when they’re phaselocked. Unlike most enemies, the lab rats will only react to maya’s action skill, and none of the other VHs.

vs something like a marauder:

who has all these voice lines for Zer0, Axton, Sal (merc), AND Maya

the lab rats will only ever respond to being phaselocked.

and what do they say?

“i see the universe!”

“i see infinity!”

“it’s beautiful!”

 (now weirdly enough i was told on the tv tropes for bl2 that the lab rats will say “I see it more!” when phaselocked by maya, but i couldn’t find a source for that. couldn’t even find it in the files i extracted from the game. i checked an online video just to double check because you know, my extraction could’ve been off, but it wasn’t there, either. even phaselocked one a bunch as maya and i couldn’t get it to proc. so, idk where that info came from, if someone could give a source/proof that would be awesomesauce.)

sooo what do other enemies say when phaselocked? usually… they just see blue. so nothing quite as interesting as infinity.

so wtf is up here? 

im thinking the experiments hyperion performed on the lab rats are letting them see the dimension maya locks them in. i mean, tbh, i think they can see into that dimension whenever they open their eyes, but maybe maya’s phaselock makes sense of it for them. because they seem to be in indescribable agony outside of it

but the lab rats aren’t the only enemies that only react to being phaselocked

turns out the psychos only react to phaselocking, too

they also have some fun lines:

“I can see forever!”

“I’m home!”

“I’m inside… I’M INSIDE ME!”

with some other nonsense thrown in for fun

so idk, just taking a look at this, it’s clear the psychos and lab rats are seeing something that the other bandits just aren’t seeing. most reactions are demands to be released or that they’re flying, or just straight up confusion as to what’s happening.

is that the side effect of their exposure to slag/eridian tech? yeah, imma bet on it. their mind machines probably broke because they saw something they weren’t supposed to (possibly into the other dimension. the one maya phaselocks them in) without proper ‘protection’ and thus went batshit. like maybe sirens are protected from the craziness of the other dimension because they’re ‘chosen’ or whatever. iunno.

i do think it’s most interesting that the psychos seem familiar with whatever they’re seeing, calling it ‘home’ and well… themselves. 

so why in the fuck am i talking about all this? because i think it ties straight into bl3.

let’s bring back lab rats and their experiments

you know how hyperion was supposedly injecting their eyes with slag? and it caused them to shoot those weird blue lasers out?

what happens to the destroyer’s eye in tps?

yeah we inject this bad boy with slag

“i only juice the eye with a little bit of slag at a time”

which ends up causing a singularity around the eye the second time you do it

“if this slag stuff is powering the laser, we need to force as much of it as we can back into the eye. the increased power will trip a failsafe and let us shut everything down”

oh, increased power? you mean like how Sirens get increased power from absorbing eridium? that kind of increased power?

we know in bl1 the Destroyer seemed to have something like slag in it- those glowing pockets on the tentacles that explode into purple goo

even its attacks are like purple liquid. which, you know… would be quite similar to slag (tho tbf, these attacks actually hurt instead of applying the debuff)

and boy does the destroyer not like it

“warning. space-time instability detected.” after injecting the eye with too much slag. but… why? it got too powerful? are its powers directly connected to the other dimension and by increasing it’s strength a bunch we created some sorta link between our dimension and the other one? 

i mean given the other dimension allows for teleportation and shit, im not surprised there’s a space-time instability!

i mean we’ve all seen it do the eye laser thing, and the tentacles, and the purple goop. but causing space-time instabilities… that’s new isn’t it? kinda like how Sirens get new powers after they absorb a bunch of eridium???

so i wanna take a guess as to what the destroyer is

we know its ‘immortal in its own realm’ but when it’s taken an actual body that we can kill it, so odds are, it never actually died in bl1 OR tps. i imagine the Destroyer we see in bl1 is just a small fragment of it, and that it’s consciousness can be spread out across hosts. *EDIT: actually the lovely @automata-systemata-hydromata reminded me that you can find the destroyers brain in Helios. The other stuff I left in should be fine tho I thiiiink (thank you!).

and that, y’know, is cool and all, but what IS it??

Jack uses slag to give it a power boost, but it doesn’t seem to be happy about it when it happens. in fact, it even seems scared.

to be honest, all we know is that the eridians locked it away for some reason

idk im just spitballing here, but what if the Eridians were the creators of the destroyer? not intentionally, or maybe it was the result of one hell of a slag experiment/exposure to the other dimension/eridian tech, but we’ve seen what slag/exposure to eridian stuff does to humans… makes them go crazy, makes them start mutating. i mean, look at badass psychos. look at goliaths.

i mean shit even think about bloodwing. she goes wild, attacking the VHs and not listening to mordecai’s instructions despite their bond

she grows to a huge size and gains a whole shitload of new powers she didn’t have before. including fucking fire breath (which we’ve seen in burning psychos)

you know these dudes

i go into all this eridium/slag mutation stuff in SO much more detail in this post here, so if you’re interested in mutations, read this!

so what if the destroyer is just one HELL of a mutated eridian/alien and it plus all the eridium was locked away forever in the other dimension to keep this from ever happening again? because god, i wouldn’t want that to ever happen again, either, and i guess locking away the eridium (you know the stuff used in all these hyperion experiments) would be their best bet at ensuring it. also maybe just… locking away anything with eridium for that long probably isn’t the best idea… maybe that’s why it’s all tentacles and death. maybe they just locked someone away in a Vault as a prison and then leaving them with all that eridium caused them to mutate wildly out of control. kinda like the FEV. 

i mean we know ‘slagged psychos’ look like this 

i wouldn’t be surprised if we gave them enough slag/time they’d end up mutating even worse. and the destroyer was left in the vault for hundreds of years.

so wtf is the connection here with Sirens? there’s gotta be one, right??? is slag experimentation the first rung on the ladder of volatile science to achieving siren-hood? like you’d have slag/eridium experiments/mutations -> the lost legion eternal -> actual Sirens. maybe if sirens take in too much eridium they become something like the destroyer. now that’s fucked up to think about.

maybe it’s better the twins took lilith’s powers away from her…

oh, speaking of mutations and burning psychos and hyperion experiments, you know what we haven’t talked about yet?

Krieg. 

let’s talk a whole lot about Krieg, because he is super important

krieg is important for a lot of reasons.

u know what his teaser trailer was named?

yeah i don’t think that’s coincidence one bit

ahhh Mayhem.

“deep beneath pandora, an experiment has escaped”

we know krieg is a hyperion test subject, dr samuels confirms this (and apparently contracts insanity as well at the end of the Crawmerax DLC)

also we know some other tests going on at the WEP from the quest Doctor’s Orders:

“this vault key didn’t make eridium come outta the ground for nothing, right?”

and there’s this one very very very interesting line by Tannis at the end of the quest:

“the spread of slag poisoning” yeah call it that DUMB name tannis, im gonna call it what all the kool kids are calling it: ~Mayhem~

so… Krieg.

what’s so special about him?

well… he gives us insight into what the hell is actually going on inside the heads of some psychos.

so idk about you guys but i always took this as a poke at Maya and Krieg, but i realize now that this is talking literally just about Krieg. it’s about his body holding both sides of himself.

krieg does appear to be like lucid behind the psycho controlling his body, which, idk about you guys, but for me that plants some pretty horrible mental images of all the psychos in-game who probably have similarly exasperated people behind them who are getting murdered because they can’t control themselves anymore.

and idk i wrote this whole post about how maybe the slag experimentation is turning people into hosts for the destroyer’s consciousness and that could explain all the wacked up psychos and shit. but tbh im not gonna talk about that today

just about slag experimentation/eridium exposure. we know what it ACTUALLY does and that’s mutate the hell out of things and cause insanity.

Krieg is like… the poster child for slag experimentation/eridium exposure

soooo why does slag experimentation make people go insane? could be any number of reasons, but tbh i would bet it has to do with that other dimension somehow. because eridium isn’t a normal ‘our dimension’ element. it came out of a vault. from a different dimension. and who knows the long-term effects of that shit.

i personally had a theory that the 4th dimension had something to do with time and that only Sirens are able to harness this power, but then i have no idea how to explain angel and amara’s powers through that lense, so eh. fuck it. just seeing an upper dimension would make you go crazy anyway, so let’s not bring any time shit into this because that’s just asking for trouble. 

either way

i think that sirens are able to make sense of that other dimension. they have some sort of command of it/some sort of tie to it that allows them to not go crazy the instant they interact with it, unlike psychos. unlike lab rats. unlike Krieg. it’s like… eridium is our window into this other dimension or some shit and Sirens are (literally) able to process it, while it just fucks over anyone else who tries to interact. ~kachow i just introduced parallels~

and tbh i think we’re going to use Sirens to help cure this plague of insanity going around the universe. probably starting with Krieg. i mean, the only time he’s able to get even an iota of control is when he sees Maya. “Turn around pretty lady!!” like… that’s HUGE for him. and Maya’s a Siren. im not saying the power of love isn’t strong… but maybe the power of Sirens is stronger. i’d love if tannis helped us out with that. maya, too, if she really did learn more about sirens on athenas. 

this all ties into borderlands 3 for 2 reasons:

1. Mayhem being both the tagline for this game and Krieg the Psycho’s DLC pack is not a coincidence

2. The calypso twins are going to be using slag to both brainwash people into becoming cultists and give them special powers

`breaks fingers` this is the real meat of this theory, all that other stuff was just getting you READY for this

let’s put the Mayhem stuff off to the side for a second and just focus on the Calypso twins.

We know they’re promising their cultists special powers and free brainwashes (lol)

we’ve seen that one concept art from the museum of mayhem with the giant slag pool

we know enemies are STILL dropping refined Eridium even though it seems like all manufacturers have stopped creating slag weaponry

and we’ve seen the slag falls in a bl3 promo material already

oh yes

okay so i said right at the very beginning of this document that i’ve seen A Scene that i wanna talk about and oh baby this is it

This Scene right here

look in the very back there

look familiar???

~it shooouuuuullld~

yeah this is it!!!

so what i think is going down: anyone who’s not already insane is sorta ‘baptized’ as their entrance into this cult in the big ol slagfall. maybe the twins have a way to induce slagged cultists so they can have elemental affinities. not sure about that.

regardless

the twins are using slag to drive people insane (turning them into psychos) as a form of brainwashing to force people to join their cult.

so that’s the special powers and the free brainwashing and the slagfalls down.

let’s talk about why exactly we’re seeing enemies drop bars of refined eridium even though hyperion stopped making them. because the twins are making it!! it makes sense why there’s no slag guns still, even if it still exists in-universe: of course no manufacturer is going to contact an insane bandit cult just to get their hands on slag for their guns. 

there was a 7 year dry spell of eridium production so there was no slag to go around, so companies started phasing it out of their guns and replacing it with nuclear. 

but the twins have recently started production again. they’re obviously not using it in their guns, or selling it to other manufacturers. so wtf are they using it for? it’s gotta be important, it’s holy holy holy.

special powers and brainwashing!

and the refined eridium is back in circulation, so enemies are still dropping it. see? solution acquired.

as for psycho-ness spreading across the universe? it makes sense. not only are the twins using their slag to brainwash people and turn them into psycho cultists, but people are also being mutated by the eridian ruins/vault keys/vaults on the other planets and being driven insane. This craziness is quite literally Mayhem.

Mayhem is coming, indeed! 

now let us talk about what the fucccck gearbox is doing with all that Mayhem stuff in the trailers and shit.

sooo WE are the cult surrounding this game. as the fan base. 

do u think it was coincidence that they made ‘ECHOnet’ Streamers the leaders of their big bad cult and then also immediately introduced, in real life, the Twitch ECHOcast extension and invited a bunch of streamers to play their demo? they knew exactly what they were doing. Giving away a free cultist psycho mask to everyone who preorders a console copy of the game? that’s intentional. everyone who preorders the game gets a ‘gold weapon skin pack’? yeah! you know what gold weapons represent in-universe? higher standing in the cult!! gearbox is making commentary on how we are all just like the cultists!

AND THEY ARE TOTALLY RIGHT

all the trailers having something to do with Mayhem? ‘Mask of Mayhem’ ‘Mural of Mayhem’ ‘We are Mayhem’ ‘Mayhem is coming’. We’re all insane cultists because we’re all absolutely fucking rabid for this game and they KNOW IT.

…

oh also we’re all in love with each other lmao. 

in all seriousness, i think the game is going to focus a lot on the relationships we have with the people we care about- our found family, our romantic interests, our friendships- and that’s being expressed through the roses. 

i think that’s why all the characters are shown in the roses on the cover art. why the roses are so prominent in the So Happy Together trailer. why Zane is sitting at a bar with a rose between himself and his clone (as a joke, but still, it’s the intent). 

red roses are, like, the most obvious way to show your affection to someone. and we know the bl3 Vault Hunters are going to find family in each other in this game. that we’re going to watch the calypso twins’ relationship become warped as the game goes on. hell, we’re probably even going to have a whole plot about tina and mordy (and talon) and brick being a small family together, and maya and ava being one as well. plus ellie and vaughn have gotten together since commander lilith. shit, guys, even claptrap is building himself a girlfriend.

this game’s about love, guys.

anyway i have been working on this since 1:30am. it’s currently 6:06am. i am very tired and very wired and those never mesh well. im gonna go eat some motherfuckin pizza.

edit: i missed the obvious connection the first time around: of course we’re going to cure Krieg, he loves Maya. and this game is all about love.

that and/or one or both of them die and gearbox hurts us right in the softest parts of our hearts.

edit 2: also yeah at some point in the near future im writing that Hyperion-Twins theory because as much as i love Atlas, i have ~seen some things~

Yay thank you I'll check out that site! and yess Hangyul's weirdness and softness somehow has a perfect balance? I mean X1 hyungline are all pretty weird and crazy but serious and caring? If not a full reboot, I do hope for some sort of unit because they really were such a good family and Hangyul and Seungyoun especially seemed sooo happy being a group again -🥚

Same, I’ve seen a lot of people go crazy mad at the fact that no one is confirming a reboot right now but tbh I’m pretty chill about it?? Like even if they were to confirm it, the guys all have their own activities now so I’d kinda prefer they say “ah yes reboot” after all of this goes by, otherwise I’ll be constantly anxious about the date lol

They all balanced each other really nicely so I hope they come back :((

Last Lover

TV SHOW: GODLESS COUPLE: WHITEY WINN X READER RATING: CUTE + SMUTTYISH

Part 1: Last Night 

Part 2: Last Debts 

Part 3: Last dollar and eighty eight

PART 4: Last Name

Y/N POV:

I woke to sun hitting me right in the eyes though a open window I think I dont know I cant see so I groan snuggling closer to Whitey’s chest and sighing happily feeling his warm chest under me and his arm around me I woke up a little more when both me and whitey seemed to move but I dont think it was either of us quickly followed by a deep voice going “Hey Whitey! Wake up already boy” I heard the sheriff

“i got it sheriff” I groan sleepily picking my head up seeing him in the open door way and giving whitey’s chest a few sweet kisses causing him to groan and move as I kiss up to his face “Whitey” I whisper between kisses around his neck his head turns to capture my lips in a sweet rather lusty kiss making me giggle as he pulled away to kiss again moving his lips against mine “Whitey come on get up” I tell him but he keeps trying to kiss me 

“Ummm Do I have to?” He groans

“Yes you do” I giggle giving him some more sweet little kisses

“Umm Before I wake up properly can maybe we you know...do what we where talkin’ bout last night” he smirks “you know a little sexy time” He smirks “Maybe wake me with a little...suck?” He smirks

“Whitey the sheriffs here to see ya, he’s at the door” I giggle

“does he look mad?” He groans

“Kinda” I giggle 

“Alright... go Tell Him I’ll be there in a minuet...and maybe we can get back to what we where up too hey” He smirks his hands grabbing my arse hard trying to convince me

“he’s here now like in the room with us whitey” I giggle 

“Oh god I’m sorry sheriff had no idea you where here”  he says sitting up still keeping me in his arms at last opening his eyes and starting to wake up more

“Yeah...Whitey get up we got work to do” He says

“What work... It’s Saturday isn't it my day off?” he groans 

“Yeah, but i got Mr ward in the cells and the new preacher just got here so... you need to protect the guy from the ladies ripping him apart, show him around and all” the sheriff explains

“Alright, I’ll go in a bit” Whitey sighs

“No whitey now, I left you out of my site for five minuets you two will be going at it” the sheriff sighs so we both sigh and I sit up properly letting whitey get up and start getting dress as the sheriff left so I got up getting dressed into my one other dress for today as I finish up I felt arms around me again

“You look loverly today y/n” He told me

“aww thank you whitey, go on then get to work” I tell him 

“what are ya gonna do?” he asks

“some laundry I think we both need some fresh clean clothes, and when you get off work we’ll go have a bath both of us” I smirk

“alright...see you later” He smiles giving me a kiss before going off to work so I went around the house picking up any clothes I could find most of them not mine taking them outside with some water and sitting in the dust scrubbing away at the clothes for a while as many women past me going off in and out of town 

“so your whitey’s girl?” a female voice asked I looked up and saw the lady from yesterday “wondered when we would get to see ya out whitey’s bed sheets” she laughed coming into the garden

“well Here I am” I shrug

“look the girls are all sorry for what happened...with the hanging and all” she says

“It’s okay, it wasn’t all bad, I met whitey after all” I shrug

“Your really sweet on him arnt ya?” she laughs and I just nod “Good didn’t want to have to break it too him he was sleeping with a girl just staying with him cause he can keep her out of trouble” she laughs

“what do you mean?” I ask

“Well Darlin’, some girls are talking all this time you spending in bed with him aint helping ya, you where accused of murder facing the rope, suddenly whitey wonders in, a young man, still maturing, next thing we know he’s risking his life and job for ya and you spend two days straight in bed with him, dont want to offend ya darlin’ but it looks a lot like your using him” she explains

“Of course not...I love whitey, at the time I thought I was gonna die, last fling I suppose Last snuggle with a good looking man, but i found more then that he’s so sweet to me I’ve never known a man treat me so nice before” I smile

“Fair enough, he’s a sweet boy, But Listen here Darlin’ you break his heart, I break your neck, we clear?” she asked

“Crystal clear” i reply a little scared as she wonders off and I continue my cleaning trying my best to get the cum stains off the bed sheet from last night not doing to well at it 

“Hello Little lady” I heard whitey smirk behind me 

“Oh Hello whitey, I wasn’t expecting you back so soon” I smile as he came and sat with me “How was it?” I ask as I wash

“Fine, showed him around had to keep him away from a few ladies, not much interesting Hun” He smiles helping me wash the clothes just as I finish a shirt turning and putting it in the done pile as I do whitey holds my chin turning my face back to him and kissing me I kiss back a little slower then I normally would more hesitant as I can see the lady stood looking at us until he pulls away noticing somethings not right

“Y/n what’s the matter?” he asks

“I think I just get a little nervous kissing ya in public I guess whitey” I blush

“aww Y/n, well better get used to it” he smirks pulling me to kiss him so I shut my eyes and concentrate on his lips moving so perfectly with mine his hands moving to sit on my waist so I wrap mine around his neck as our kiss deepened knowing I have to stop him soon we are outside in the garden anyone could see us plus If I dont stop him soon He’ll have me on the floor but amazingly he didnt after a while of kissing I began to feel a little hornier then usual  maybe it’s where he left me horny last night taking one hand from his neck down trying to push his hand down from my waist towards my-

“Okay....” He laughs quickly pulling away from me “I don’t have a clue what’s bloody up with you today...but, I dont dislike it” he smirks at me so I just return to washing clothes as I can feel the eyes of many people on me so I finish the washing taking everything and going to put it on the line to dry “Y/n? what’s the matter?” He asks

“Nothing” I blush “Just getting used to being a little house wife” i giggle

“come here” He smirks pulling me tightly onto him holding my waist tightly “i didnt even get to tell you the best part about today” He begins

“can’t you talk and walk whitey laundry dont dry it’s self” I say going back to hanging the Landry 

“Okay” He laughs helping me hang things “I had a chat with the preacher...turns out he’s opening his mini chapel tomorrow for emergency bits like catching up on everything while the towns been without one” He explains

“Ohh that’s nice” I shrug “stuff like christenings...funeral stuff that kinda thing?” I shrug

“yeah...so...If you really wanted too, we could go get married tomorrow” He smirks holding me tightly nuzzling his head into my neck

“Oh...well maybe thats a little soon...to short notice for him and for us whitey, but I suppose we could chat with him maybe book ourselves a little ceremony in a month or so” I suggest

“Okay” He smiles giving me a few sweet kisses

“Just Okay? no other opinions?” I ask

“It’s what ever you wanna do Hun, I dont mind so long as I get to marry ya and soon I dont mind” he shrugs as I finish up with the clothes “sooo... bath now?” he smirks and I just nod a little giggly 

“you’ve just been waiting for that all day?” i giggle

“course I have” He laughs

“from what most people round here you hate baths” I smirk

“I do...But the idea of you giving me a bath... not totally against that” he smirks

“Hey I said going to have a bath at the same time I said nothing about bathing ya whitey” I laugh

“yeah well...I figured you wouldn’t be able to resit me, sitting in the warm steamy water with my hard cock standing above the water Begging ya to touch me” He groans running his hands down my dress

“whitey...lets go get some water...so you can have that bath” I smirk so he grabbs my hand running off to his horse loading it up with a few containers fro water and I mounted his horse pretty easy but it immediately tried to shake me off

“Whoa! Clam down boy, it’s just y/n” whitey told him trying to calm him down quickly getting on behind me and beginning to ride off out of town towards the river once we got there whitey tried up his horse so I went over with a container filling it with as much water as I could bending over to get the good water and within a few short seconds I felt whitey behind me holding my hips tightly grinding his cock against me 

“whitey...what are you up too” I giggle

“what do you think, I’ve barely touched ya all day, I need you y/n” He begs

“Whitey...stop it come on help me” I laugh

“Oh I’ll help ya” He smirks pulling up my dress and slipping three of his long slender fingers inside of my pussy using another to lightly stoke my clit his other hand moving back down and spanking me hard “Do as your told...take your dress off and get in that water before I bend you over and fuck you right here” he smirks

“No!” I giggle and he just smirks kissing my cheek before thrusting his fingers hard into me and sucking at my neck flicking my clit while he groped my arse “Ohh Whitey!” I moan 

“Good girl, Moan for me” He smirks undoing my dress and slipping it off my body leaving me in my under dress but I just move away from his arms and pushing him in the water but he just grabs my waist and takes me with him straight into the water splashing each other and giggling like crazy as we messed around in the water even stripping him a little so only our bare minimum clothing remained sticking to our bodies with the cold water until some how we ended up in the shallows sitting on his lap his hands on my hips and mine in his hair kissing like crazy until I pull away

“what is it?” He asks

“Whitey...I wanna marry you tomorrow” I blush

“Really? I thought you said it as too -” he begins before I kiss him again “why the change of heart darlin’?” he asks

“I dont know...I just” I begin stroking his hair out his face “I wanna be with you forever, and to kiss ya without getting started at by every lady in town” I blush

“Okay, tomorrow, you and me” He blushed

“Tomorrow I will be Mrs Winn” I giggle

“Yeah, you will, and I will have the love of my life as my wife” he smirks once we actually got some water we went off home and I heated it all up filling the bath tub up for whitey, as he came back from talking to the sheriff the hot water looking very nice so I quickly hopped in washing myself and my hair being done pretty easy as I was fairly clean before wrapping a cloth around myself as I get out waiting for my hair to dry letting it hang down my back as I cook up some dinner as I heard the door 

“Hello whitey” I smile not looking away from my cooking

“this, is what I need waiting for me to get home everyday” He smirks 

“what do you mean?” I giggle

“All this, a warm fire, a clean house, a toasty bath, dinner being made and you stood with hardly anything on” he smirks giving me a little kiss “I can’t wait till your my wife” he laughs

“Its what a few hours whitey you can wait” I giggle “Go on go have your bath” I tell him so he goes into the middle of the room and I couldn’t help but watch as he stripped himself naked and climbed into the bath sitting in the warm water for a moment before slowly washing himself so I take dinner off the stove and creep over sitting behind the bath leaning on the metal edge watching him for a moment as he didn't see me yet it made me laugh so I smirked putting my hands on his shoulders making him jump

“Ohh y/n, you made me jump” He laughs but I just slide my hands down his wet body taking the bar of soap from him 

“Your never gonna get clean just rubbing a soap bar once on ya whitey” I laugh

“sorry, I dont do this much” He sighs

“I know” I laugh rubbing the soap in my hands “see like this so the bubbles go on your hands” I tell him “then you take your soapy hands and scrub” i tell him running my hands all over his chest 

“I thought you said you went gonna wash me?” he smirks

“I wasn't but your hopeless on your own” I laugh “Now once you see all the dirt come off on your hands then water” I smile cupping the water and pouring it on him 

“Ohh bugger thats hot!” He complains

“Hotter the better whitey now, keep doing that while I fix dinner” I tell him as I get up but he doesn't even move “scrub scrub whitey else I aint feeding ya” i laugh so he does as Ive told him scrubbing his whole body alot it kinda looked like he got a whole layer of skin off and everything was completely new as he finished up and got out putting some pants on as I severed up dinner “Dinner time” I call 

“coming, Hun” he replys and I saw him come into the room pants on using a towel to dry his hair he looked so different I kinda liked it “what?” He asks

“Nothing, you look good is all” I smile sitting down to eat

“Do I look sexy?” he smirks sitting with me beginning to eat  

“You always look sexy” I giggle “How about me? do I look better now Ive had a bath?” I ask

“Nope, there was no way fro you to get more beautiful Y/n” he tells me

“aww whitey, thats cute” I giggle 

“Just think, this time tomorrow You’ll be Mrs Y/n Winn” he smirks at me 

“Yep, Mrs Winn, the pretty little Ex criminal married to the deputy” I smirk taking the washing up from dinner 

“Indeed, I’m sure you’ll be a good little wifey” he smirks “does my little wifey need a spanking tonight?” he smirks

“Not tonight I think whitey not had any desire to do anything naughty today” I giggle 

“aww I was rather hoping you had” He laughed

“what about you whitey? any desires today to be a little naughty?” I smirk

“Yeah I did” He smirks so I take his hand sitting on the bed and giving him a couple short kisses 

“what was it?” I smirk

“the sheriff pissed me off, dragging me away from you so much” he sighed

“Ohh what did you want to do?” I smirk

“lock him in the cell for a night or two while we could have as much fun as we liked” he smirked

“ohh whitey, thats very bad” I smirk kissing up his neck “Bad Boy” I smirk sitting back more and patting my knee and he smirked at me 

“really? you expect me to just bend over your knee so you can spank me honey?” he laughs so I just push him over forcing him to bend over my knee “It’s not gonna do anything to me, im not you darlin’ I dont have a odd kinky fetish like you do” he sighs so I smirk Spanking him hard “Oww! That Bloody hurt” he complains trying to look up at me but I just push his head down again spanking him again less hard this time and doing it again and again each time making him jump “Umm” He groaned as I spanked him

“What was that?” I giggle

“I see why you like this so much” He groans so I spank him again harder this time “Ummm Y/n!” He moans so I smirk undoing his belt and tugging down his pants and spanking him again “UHhhh ! Y/n” He moans making me giggle at him as I giggled he tried to escape but I just got hold of him so he couldnt move 

“Bad Boy” I giggle spanking him harder again 

“UhHHH Y/N! PLEASE!” He moans 

“It wont work on me...im not you...I dont have a odd kinky fetish like you do” I giggle

“Okay okay I take it back this is kinda hot” he groans so I spank him  hard

“Bad boy, dont make assumptions until you try it, you might find you like it” I smirk spanking him again “Bad boy Whitey” I giggle pulling down his underwear and spanking him again onto his bare skin 

“UHHHHHHH! Y/N!” he moans 

“What are ya?” I smirk

“Im a bad boy Y/n” he moans as I spank him again making me giggle like crazy at him “Y/n please...” He moans 

“Please what whitey?” I giggle

“Please Y/n another...Ive been so bad” He smirks

“Indeed you have whitey” I giggle spanking him hard again 

“uUUHHHHHH YES Y/N!” He moans 

“Say it again whitey, I kinda like you saying it” I smirk spanking him lightly this time 

“Ummm Im a bad boy Darling, Please please another y/n Ive been so bad, Ive been a bad bad boy” He groans so I smirk grabbing his belt from the floor and folding it over almost like a whip and spanking him with it “UHHHH YES YES YES!” He screams “Oh god Y/n...I kinda like you being in charge” he smirks

“Get used to it whitey, your pretty little wifeys gonna have to give her husband a spanking sometimes, when he’s been a naughty boy” I smirk hitting him again 

“Ummmm” He groans “I cant take it” he moans getting up and stripping naked “Get on the bed NOW!” He orders so I quickly lay on the bed ready for whatever hot, sexy deed he was about to do on me as he climbed atop me until there was a frantic knocking on the door

“WHITEY THERE’S AN EMERGENCY COME QUICK!” a female voice shouted and a few gun shots where heard so he sighed quickly getting up and getting his clothes back on and grabbing his guns

“See ya later” He sighs giving me a kiss before rushing off I was so worried as time kept going by had to fall asleep over time my body not being able to sit and wait any longer I feel asleep alone and worried....When I woke up I could smell bacon and hash browns and all sorts of yummy fried food I got up and noticed him over by the table setting out some food so I ran jumping on him so happy he was okay 

“Oh whitey I was so worried” I smile hugging him tighter

“Aww I know Im sorry y/n, sheriff got me sitting looking after this guy who got drunk and diced to shoot up the Hotel la Belle bar, he was okay we let him out now to go home, he was ranting all night about looking for his girlfriend and apparently from what the bar keep was tellin’ me he came in and got drunk cause someone told him his girlfriend was getting married...Poor guy” He sighs

“Yeah...well Im just happy your safe, I kept hearing guns and when you didnt come home...it scared me” i cry

“Oh y/n im so sorry, It wont happen again I promise, Ill make sure to drop in at least and tell you im okay” he smiled hugging me tighter “but enough about last night...I made you breakfast...my sexy little bride” he smirks

“aww thank you whitey” I giggle sitting and eating some it was...bad to be nice i ate as much as I could before I began to feel ill so I stopped leaving the rest as I saw him stood in the mirror trying to fix his hair so I went and hugged him “Don’t leave me like that again” I whisper

“I wont” he whispers back before going to kiss me but I stop him 

“No whitey...you can wait were getting married today” I laugh going and getting dressed into the best dress I had and taking his hand both of us rushing off to where the church was being built and the new preacher was stood with a tiny set up to do basic things 

“ahh your the ones who want to get married arnt ya?” he asked and we just nod very excited “short or long version?” He asked

“Uhh super super short” I laugh

“How short?” he asked

“Short like we need to do this quick else we are in danger of really dirtying your floor” Whitey tells him making me laugh

“emergency shot gun verses then” he smirked at us 

“Do you Y/n Y/l/n Take this man to be your husband?” He asked

“Yep” I giggle

“do you Whitey Winn take this woman to be your wife?” He asked

“Definatly” He laughed

“Any objections?” he shouted almost as if asking the whole town

“YEAH! I got one...” a man yelled I looked down the street and there sat on a horse was My old Boyfriend 

“What is your objection?” he asks

“Y/n i still love you, Please dont do this to me...I haven't seen you in weeks, Y/n please- What the Fuck, HIM!? HE’S THE ONE YOUR MARRYING!” he yelled

“Arthur what the hell is wrong with you, I felt you months ago” I tell him

“You ran off I was so worried about you?” He said

“Yeah i took everything i had and I left, because I never loved you i explained this to you” I tell him “you know taking lots of stuff and not coming back while yelling I never want to see you again is how a break up kinda works” i explain to him

“WAIT just a dam minuet here...Mr Arthur, Y/n my Y/n is the one you where shooting up town about last night, My Y/n Y/L/N is the one you where talking about last night” whitey asked very confused “the sweet, virgin, who wouldnt even ride a horse on her own ? are you sure you got the right girl...cause that is not the Y/n I know” he laughed

“I’ll fight ya for her!” He yelled

“Excuse me!” I shout rather mad

“I’ll fight ya for her! you and me who ever wins she marries” Arthur suggested “or are ya two scared” He laughed

“Guys this is stupid!” I yell

“I’ll fight ya” Whitey shrugs “I’ll fight ya for the woman I love”

“Guys this is ridiculous!” I I yell

“Lets go then you and me!” Arthur laughs getting off his horse and whitey goes towards him the two actually looking like one was about to punch the other

“Fine...Hit me you son of a bitch” whitey tells him

“is anyone listening to me!” I shout before running into the middle of the fight and firing the gun I keep in my bra “ENOUGH!” I shout 

“Fine we wont fight...but y/n you choose between us” arthur tells me “Come on Y/n i’ll take you home with me back to our little place to our kittens” he suggested trying to coast me over to him

“Y/n? I- I - I dont know what I can offer you, I mean I saved your life, you took my virginity from me, I- I love you, don’t- Don’t you love me too?” whitey asked

“JUST PICK ALREADY!” the preacher yells

“Fine easy i pick Whitey, now bugger off Arthur” I tell him 

“what! how did you choose him over me? and so fast?” arthur asked

“Because I love whitey, and I dont love you Arthur and I never did” I tell him taking whitey’s hand and going back to the preacher 

“Your brought a hidden bra gun to our wedding?” whitey asked me

“i was prepared” I shrug 

“i love you so much” he laughed hugging me tightly 

“right we where uh - where were we?” he asked

“Objections” I laugh

“Oh right... any objections yes but its cleared up...I now pronounce you man and wife you may kiss your bride” he explained 

“Finally I've been waiting all morning” whitey laughs kissing me so I holding him close and kiss him back before he pulled away and picked me up 

“Whoa! Whitey” I giggle kissing him again as he took me out the half done church out to a sad Arthur “Go on Arthur go have a drink, theres plenty of ladies here would love your company” I tell him as whitey put me down 

“you go on I need a word with Arthur” whitey told me so I giggled giving him a kiss a wondering home luckily I did hear everything “soo...did you and y/n ever...” he asked

“Of course not...I’m not that kinda guy” arthur said

“Good...just wanted to check that, just a hint, you missed out BIG time, she is the kinkyest, sexiest woman I have ever seen...to bad for you I married her” He laughed wondering away before noticing I was so close by listening to it all “Oh you little bugger I told ya to go on home” He laughed

“I wanted to check what you where telling him” I laugh

“alright, but as your my sexy wifey now, guess that means its our honeymoon now so, we should go do everything we did before and then some” he smirks

“lets go whitey, I haven't had your cock for over 12 hours, I think im in withdrawal” I laugh

“come on then, lets get home so we can start our very very fun weekend” he smirks picking me up again and taking me home us kissing the whole way back ....

Korotan D: Chapter 3 - English Translation 

This chapter, like chapter 1, is fairly short, so it was pretty easy to translate ^^

In this chapter, along with our usual trio, we get a lot of Chiba, Hayami, Sugaya, and Okajima, along with some Yada, Mimura, and Itona! 

The only picture for this chapter is the one above. No memories framed as photographs this time : ( 

Chapter 3: Filming Time 

Just as Kayano and the rest of Class E were returning to the film site after lunch-break was over, a member of the staff got into a heated argument with the director. The assistant director and Jerome tried to arbitrate between them, but the two only heated up their argument.

“I can’t postpone the shooting date any more than I already have! Doing things your way will take too much time!”

“It’s your job to keep your work on schedule! We’re running late because you take so much time communicating with the local staff, not to mention they take too much time to procure the goods I ask for!”

“Don’t put the blame on others! We’re experiencing this delay because you keep changing the scenes around!”

“Because it’s my job to make the movie better!”

Even the local staff who were transporting their equipment stopped in their tracks to watch the exchange between the director and the line producer. Members of the staff who couldn’t speak English very well were bewildered by the two as they spoke more and more rapidly, but Karma and Nakamura conveyed the contents of the argument in simpler English as they eagerly listened.

“Whenever I make a change, it’s your job to make it happen, right!?”

Upon receiving these words, the line producer reached the limit of his patience and suddenly snapped.

“Aah, I understand. If my work is of such little concern to you, then you can gather up your own staff by yourself. I quit.”

He said what he wanted to say, and then turned his heel.

“Hey, wait! Are you abandoning your workplace!?”

The producer turned around one more time at the sound of his voice, gave him the finger, and then left. Nathonni continued to briskly speak Italian in his rage.

“Director, you should apologize and have him come back,” the cameraman said, although he himself didn’t catch the whole argument.

“Woah……I don’t really get what just happened, but it looks really bad,” Terasaka whispered.

Kayano stared at the state of affairs in astonishment. With the line producer gone, the local staff whom he had gathered began to leave one after another, until all who were in charge of transporting the film equipment left altogether. Faced with such circumstances, the cameraman gave into grief.

“Director, what do we do!? We won’t be able to make the movie like this! Losing our assistant is just the same as losing all our limbs!”

Calming down from his anger, Nathonni began to regret what he had done.

“……We’ll need some new staff.”

“And where the hell will we find new staff!? We’re already on a tight schedule!”

The cameraman rebuked the director. Watching the director cradle his head in his hands, Karma called out to Kayano,

“Kayano-chan, we can help them, right?”

Terasaka immediately retorted from the side,

“Are you stupid!? We’re total amateurs!”

“And so we can help. You’re a stupid amateur with physical strength.”

“Huh!?”

“Which means you can help out with heavy work and chores, right? Let’s support Kayano’s performance.”

Nagisa gave a strong nod to Karma’s words.

“Korosensei, Karasuma-sensei, and Bitch-sensei…… under their guidance, we polished all sorts of blades in the assassination classroom. Right now, there should definitely be something useful we can do.”

“Yeah!”

“Let’s do this!”

Class E raised their voices all at once. Kayano was moved by their spirit.

“Everyone…… thank you!”

While everyone in Class E was discussing amongst themselves, Kayano took them to Nathonni.

“Director, my friends say they want to become part of your staff and help out!”

“I’m grateful for the offer, but what are they capable of?”

Karma stepped forward to the incredulous Nathonni and spoke in fluent English,

“As you can see, everyone has various skills on top of being able to speak English, so I think we’ll be of use. We can also serve as interpreters for your Japanese staff, and this guy is especially sturdy, so it doesn’t matter if you bury him in the Earth and use him as a pillar.”

Karma pointed to Terasaka, causing Nathonni to laugh at his joke.

“Ha ha, your English is perfect. If your friends can speak it this well then we’re saved.”

“Hey, Karma. What the hell did you tell him?”

“I asked him to please handle Terasaka-kun with care.”

“Tch, I bet you told him to abuse me!”

Everyone was extremely busy thanks to the circumstances on site, so Class E was immediately sorted into different teams among the film’s staff.

Mimura, as an aspiring TV man, immediately entered the workplace as an assistant for the assistant director. Okajima joined the filming department, and Sugaya came forward to help the art department.

Hara entered the costume department, and Muramatsu entered the catering department. Whenever Class E heard there was a personnel shortage in any of the departments, they took advantage of their English skills to rapidly join in. Yada took on the challenge to do the maintenance for the equipment vehicle used to transport their sets.

“It’s sooo hoooot.”

“Here, make sure you stay properly hydrated.”

Nagisa handed Yada a plastic bottle of water.

“Ooh, thank you! Which team are you in, Nagisa?”

Nagisa’s shoulders drooped down as he answered.

“I’m just doing miscellaneous chores that don’t require a lot of strength……. I thought about helping them transport their lighting equipment, but I don’t have enough strength to even carry any of it, so some of the female staff members got mad at me.”

I’m going to be in college soon, and yet I’m just as unmanly as ever….

Yada felt bad for Nagisa, who was so down in the dumps.

 A few months ago, the film group had built a giant set near the actual temples. The stone ruins in which the heroes Jerome and Rin wander were freshly built at that time.

Chiba and Hayami came there to take a peak.

“Yo, Chiba, you’re going to study architecture, right?”

Sugaya called out to Chiba as he was repainting the set.

“Yeah. This kind of structure is different than proper architecture, but I was interested in what kinds of techniques they used to assemble this, so I came to take a look.”

“I’m in a similar boat. For us to get tangled into this kind of interesting work, it’s like a godsend.”

“But this is awesome. So they can build such large structures for a set, huh?”

Chiba was astounded by the size.

“It looks just like the real deal.”

Hayami carefully examined the portion Sugaya was repainting. These stone ruins on set were, in fact, not made of stone at all. Internally, steel and wood were combined to build a sturdy structure, while externally, imitation rocks made of colored Styrene* were affixed to the frame.

One of the art assistants, a craftsman, approached Chiba and the others, who were staring at the structure with wonder, and spoke,

“Ha ha, it’s astonishing, isn’t it? I’ll let you guys take a proper look at the inside.”

The art assistant invited the three into the set. The insides held the atmosphere of a forgotten temple, naturally giving off a feeling of roughness that comes with having no people within for several thousands of years. It even felt as if the cracks along the interior were allowing water to leak through.  The stone passageway continued endlessly.

“It’s well-built, am I right? Go inside and take a look for yourself.”

They entered the stone passageway as the art assistant talked. Chiba and the others followed the art assistant as they advanced further into the dim passage. Suddenly, the art assistant stopped in his tracks.

“Look, this point onward is just wall.”

He hit what was supposed to be a passage continuing further into the temple with his fist. It was not actually a continuation of the passageway, but a wall. It was a dead-end.

“It’s fine for us to simply paint the wall to make it look like there are passages leading inside.  That way, we don’t have to build the whole thing as if it were the real thing. We’ve got to save money when we can.”

Sugaya was in pure admiration of their workmanship.

“I made all sorts of disguises in Class E, but professionals really are amazing, huh?”

Sugaya wanted to convey this to the art assistant, but he couldn’t find the words to say it.

“I want to tell him that, but how do you say it in English? I’m not very good at English……”

Hayami gave the hesitant Sugaya some advice.

“Use brief phrases mixed with gestures. If you don’t tell him now, you’ll regret it.”

“Okay.”

Receiving a boost from Hayami, Sugaya was able to work up his courage.

“This work, great. I do art, too, but can’t quite do this.”              

“Is that so? Thanks for the compliment!”

Seeing the two communicate successfully, a faint smile floated onto Hayami’s lips.

 Thanks to Class E helping out the art group, adjustments to the set were made at a rapid pace while Nathonni devoted his time to filming the next scene.

The action team mounted Jerome’s body on a harness. This was a scene where Jerome would have to move around by freely running through the trees of the jungle, flying off the vines hanging down.

Jerome, confident in his physical abilities, was itching to start moving.

“Girls from all over the world are going to fall in love with me and my action scenes all over again!”

Two people pulled against the wire connected to Jerome’s harness, making his body float in midair, and he began to dynamically move about through the atmosphere. Under the guidance of the action director, he ran through the air.

“Ooh, this is cool! It’s totally different from free running!”

Okajima, who was delegated into the role of pulling the wire, gazed at Jerome’s movements.

“Whew!!”

Jerome let out a strange voice as he bounced through the trees like a sewing needle. His reflexes were as good as one would expect.

“Good, good! Just like that!”

Nathonni was pleased.

To show off Jerome’s movements more flashily, they tested using cameras moved with a combination of cranes and rails. However, Nathonni looked dissatisfied when he checked the film.

“You’re making such great pains to move so magnificently, and yet the cameras are so ordinary. I want this to have more impact, as if it were something no one has ever seen before.”

Upon saying this, Nathonii clasped his hands together.

“I know! Let’s have the cameraman suspend himself on a wire, too! The cameraman will chase behind Jerome and film him!”

They needed more workers to hold the extra wire, so Itona and Mimura joined them.

“Woah! It’s this hard to balance on a wire!?”

The cameraman struggled with being suspended on a wire for the first time. Moving while being hung on a wire was not as easy as it appeared. He struggled to maintain his balance as he looked through the viewfinder.

When Nathonni looked at the test video, it was seen that the cameraman was able to follow Jerome and create a dynamic video, but the screen was shaking so violently that the film was unusable.

“Please, let me take a break. My vision is spinning.”

At the cameraman’s request, the wire was removed from his body.

“It looks like it could be such an interesting video. What a waste.”

Seeing Nathonni so disappointed, Okajima raised his hand and stepped forward.

“Um, I’m always taking pictures of sports players, so I’m used to capturing fierce movements with a camera. Will you let me try?”

“A sports cameraman, huh? If that’s the case, let’s give you a shot.”

Okajima attached the harness to himself, and was lifted up with the wire.  

“Mimura, you can move it faster!”

“OK!!”

Mimura promptly pulled the wire and ran. Okajima’s body danced through the air.

“Yahoo!!”

Okajima followed closely behind Jerome as he held his camera, freely storing his acrobatic movements within. Nathonii watched the recording video through his monitor.

“Great! Great! Move like that!”

Okajima would sometimes kick against a tree, instantaneously changing the angle of the camera. With movements even bolder than Jerome’s, every angle of Okajima’s subject was accurately tracked.

“Cut!! Fantastic! This scene is brimming with dynamism!”

Nathonni acclaimed. Receiving such praise, Okajima triumphantly said,

“I’m always chasing after beautiful athletes with even more speed than that! This was a piece of cake!”

Holding the other end of the wire, Itona murmured,

“All roads lead to eroticism, I see.”

Beginning with Okajima’s success, the former assassins of Class E had earned the trust of the film staff in all sorts of different fields.

 Notes:

*Styrene is basically Styrofoam, but unbranded.

Pretty relaxing chapter as whole! Just Class E being helpful and learning new things ^.^

I’m impressed with Okajima’s abilities, albeit a bit leery of how he obtained them. You better have permission to be filming those girls!

The next chapter is literally titled Temptation Time, so it probably will not be so relaxing… Nagikae and Karumana fans will certainly enjoy it  

Princess.

Group: 24K Member: Cory Word Count: 1816 Genre: Fluff ft. some veeeerrrry mild angst & suggestive smut.

You swallowed, simultaneously nervous and angry. You weren’t a confrontational person, and it wasn’t often you found yourself in an argument. But here you were, red faced with fists clenched as you looked at the guy across from you. You thought back to the first day you met him, almost a year ago, at your cousin’s birthday party. 

You didn’t like parties, you weren’t a social person. In fact sometimes you wondered how you’d even managed to befriend your best friend, let alone be pretty much adopted by his family, accepted as one of their own. It was your cousin’s birthday, and she was throwing a massive party. You were invited, naturally, and dragged along by your best friend.

It wasn’t long before you went missing, some of your family members trying to locate where you’d disappeared to. You’d been hiding in one of the bedrooms, and had locked the door behind you to avoid everyone. It’s not that you hated anyone, it was that you were simply terrified of people. An extreme introvert.

After convincing everyone that you were okay, and that they should go back to the party, you’d quickly gone to the toilet. Luckily it was an en suite, so you didn’t have to leave the comfort of the room. When you came back, however, you froze. A guy was sitting on the bed, on his phone. You wondered if you’d forgotten to lock the door behind your best friend as he left, and stood for a while wondering what to do.

As if he sensed your presence, he looked up. “Oh.” He said, standing up immediately “I’m sorry, is this your room?”

“No…I’m just in here to.. umm.” You mumbled.

“You not really a party person either?” He asked with a smile. You shook your head in response. “Do you mind if I stay in here too?”

You looked like a deer caught in headlights, you were unsure what to do. He caught on and politely bowed and got up to leave. You felt a little bad. “No.” You said, causing him to halt and look at you. “I don’t mind.”

“Thanks.” He said, taking a seat back down on the bed.

You weren’t quite sure what had come over you, and why you had let him stay, but that wasn’t your main concern now. Your main concern was what to do with yourself. You had let him stay on the room, and so now you couldn’t do anything freely, he could be watching you, judging you. You stood awkwardly, still in the bathroom doorway.

“I won’t bite.” He said after a while, with a little chuckle. You forced an uncomfortable laugh, and he must have sensed your uneasiness because he frowned. “My names Cory, what’s yours?” He asked.

“Y/N..”

You could tell he was a nice guy, because he was clearly trying to make you feel better, by cracking jokes and acting silly. He also seemed so genuine, asking you questions and trying to keep up a conversation and helping you to feel more comfortable. You’d exchanged your ages, mentioned how you’d both been invited to the party, and why you’d both seeked refuge in one of the bedrooms, away from the party.

He was friendly. Maybe that’s why you had eventually sat on the bed next to him.

He was good looking. Maybe that’s why you had been able to look him in the eyes as you conversed.

He was funny. Maybe that’s why you laughed along to his antics. 

You eventually felt more and more comfortable around him, glad that you had let him stay in the room with you. You began to open up a little more, becoming less shy. 

He was charming. Maybe that’s why you didn’t stop him as he pressed his lips against yours. 

It had been a long while since you had broken up with your ex. Maybe that’s why you’d let things go so far.

He’d called you ‘Princess’. Maybe that’s why you’d given him your number the next morning.

If someone had asked you, you would have told them you could never be in a friends with benefits relationship. Now you wondered if that was what you had. You knew that anyone who knew what was going on would judge you, so you kept it to yourself. You deleted the almost weekly ‘Hey, Princess, you free tonight?’ texts. You would pretend he had the wrong flat on those few days he turned up unannounced whilst you had company.

Friends with benefits are friends who occasionally hook up, but you and Cory weren’t even friends, so what did that make you? Sure, you knew his name, his age, that he was friends with a friend of your cousin, and that he didn’t really like parties. But that doesn’t make you friends, that makes you acquaintances. So were you acquaintances with benefits?

He was addicting. Maybe that’s why this whole situation was so confusing.

“Why the hell didn’t you even tell me you were a trainee? Were you just using me to try and get famous this whole time?” He spat.

Your best friend had got you an audition with an entertainment company a few years ago, and you’d been a trainee ever since. Your company was pushing you to join a survival show, and the contestants had just been announced to the public. Obviously, Cory wasn’t too happy about seeing your face among the 19 other trainees. You’d been arguing for about 45 minutes at this point.

 “What did you think? That we would become friends or date so that I’d introduce you to all my other idol friends? You think you can just sleep your way to the top like that?”

The insults and accusations just kept coming and coming, and you didn’t know what to do. It was surreal. Was this even happening? You didn’t know.

It wasn’t much longer until you finally snapped. 

“Why didn’t I tell you? We aren’t friends, Cory. We don’t talk or have normal conversations. You didn’t tell me you were an idol! How was I supposed to know? In case you forgot, I’m foreign, I’m not Korean, I don’t even know of that many idols.” You threw back. “And sleeping my way to the top? This isn’t America, Cory, you’re an idol, you should know it doesn’t work like that. And even then, why would I still be sleeping with you if all I wanted was fame? It’s been, like what? A year? Don’t you think I would’ve given up already?” Your voice was becoming quieter and forced the more you spoke, and so the last sentence was almost inaudible. “Did you forget that it was you who came onto me in the first place?”

His expression changed almost immediately, his red faced angry look exchanged for a look of utter heartbreak. After a while he finally spoke, his voice cracking as he did.

“Princess, I am so sorry. I am so so sooo sorry. You’re completely right. I don’t know why I reacted like that, I’m so sorry, please forgive me.” He started peppering little kisses all over your face between his apologies. 

He was cute. Maybe that’s why you couldn’t stay mad at him, and giggled as you playfully pushed him away.

He was the most beautiful man you’d ever seen. Maybe that’s why your heart started pounding in your chest. 

Everything changed after that day. You saw each other less because you were so busy, but when you did meet up, everything was a lot more meaningful. Nothing was rushed, it was more passionate and slow. Pillow talk and cuddle sessions would occur, he would sometimes even run a bath for you to take together. Occasionally if he was free, he’d sleep over.

This only made the situation more complicated though, you still had no idea what you were to each other. You wondered what his members, friends and family would think of you if they found out. You wondered how it would affect his career and your possible career if this got out.

But there was something about him. Maybe that was why you’d let this whole fiasco carry on.

Despite the fact that you’d only known him a year and a half, whatever you had had more meaning to you than what you had with your ex, and he was your first love, who you’d been with for eight years.

“What? Like a date?” You’d asked Cory after he’d asked you to the movies, you’d unfortunately been eliminated from the survival show, but it meant that you had more time now. Cory had just finished group promotions and so was free this evening.

“Yeah, sure, a date.” He replied with a smile.

There were very few people in the theatre, due to it being so late of an evening. The movie you were watching, just like every other movie had a ridiculous love story twisted into the already crazy action storyline. It made you a little uncomfortable watching a sex scene on such a big screen. 

“You ever wanted to have sex at a movie theatre?” Cory joked, slinging his arm around your shoulders and pulling you close.

You pushed him away with a chuckle. “No.”

“No? You haven’t? I thought that was something everyone’s dreamed about?”

“You dreamed about having sex in a theatre?” You asked with a laugh.

“Hey, don’t ruin my fantasies.”

“Well, if you wanna jerk off in a movie theatre, go ahead. But don’t do it around me, don’t tell me about it, and don’t get caught doing it.”

He laughed as he pulled you into him, planting a big kiss on your cheek.

At some point your hands became intertwined, and they stayed like that until after the movie ended when you were on the way to the market to see if there were any stalls or shops open in the early hours of the morning. They stayed like that until you reached your house, your arms swinging merrily as you talked on the way home. He watched you yawn as you reached your apartment.

“Tired?”

“Very.”

“Just go straight to bed then, make sure you get some sleep.” 

You woke up in the middle of the night. The site of Cory sleeping peacefully opposite you made the smile spread across your face. The weight of his arm around your waist made you feel safe and warm.

This was the first time you’d spent properly with Cory, without sleeping with him. Maybe that’s why you felt so at ease.

He’d promised to introduce you to his friends soon. Maybe that’s why you were feeling so happy.

He looked at you with love and adoration. Maybe that’s why you were questioning how you felt about him.

 You think you’re falling for him. Or maybe you’d been in love with him this whole time.

1-200

200: My crush’s name is: chanel 💚

199: I was born in: joplin mo

198: I am really: gay

197: My cellphone company is: verizon

196: My eye color is: hazel

195: My shoe size is: 9....in men’s

194: My ring size is: depends on the finger but 8 on my ring finger

193: My height is: 5.7

192: I am allergic to: cats & mildew

191: My 1st car was: 94 camaro

190: My 1st job was: at the hit zone

189: Last book you read: love her wild

188: My bed is: big af

187: My pet: my boom baby

186: My best friend: boom baby duh

185: My favorite shampoo is: pantene

184: Xbox or ps3: ps4

183: Piggy banks are: not in my vocabulary because i’m broke

182: In my pockets: boxers on sooo no pockets

181: On my calendar: lots of appointments & hopefully a date 😏

180: Marriage is: beautiful!

179: Spongebob can: get dis

178: My mom: is a beautiful soul

177: The last three songs I bought were? upset-lauren sanderson, billies album, jocelyn flores-XXX

176: Last YouTube video watched: jeffree star 😅

175: How many cousins do you have? too many to count

174: Do you have any siblings? yes 2

173: Are your parents divorced? nope

172: Are you taller than your mom? yes

171: Do you play an instrument? drums

170: What did you do yesterday? laundry & watched true blood

[ I Believe In ]

169: Love at first sight: yes

168: Luck: yes

167: Fate: yes

166: Yourself: depends on the day

165: Aliens: yes

164: Heaven: yes

163: Hell: yes

162: God: yes

161: Horoscopes: yes

160: Soul mates: duh

159: Ghosts: oh yeah

158: Gay Marriage: nope

157: War: ehh no

156: Orbs: yesh

155: Magic: living & breathing & the way the body works is magic so yes

[ This or That ]

154: Hugs or Kisses: kisses

153: Drunk or High: high

152: Phone or Online: phone

151: Red heads or Black haired: red heads i mean cmon

150: Blondes or Brunettes: recently changed to blondes & for good reason

149: Hot or cold: hot

148: Summer or winter: summer

147: Autumn or Spring: autumn

146: Chocolate or vanilla: chocolate

145: Night or Day: day

144: Oranges or Apples: apples

143: Curly or Straight hair: curly

142: McDonalds or Burger King: mcdanks

141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: milk chocolate baby

140: Mac or PC: mac

139: Flip flops or high heals: neither

138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: sweet & poor

137: Coke or Pepsi: pepsi

136: Hillary or Obama: obama

135: Burried or cremated: both?

134: Singing or Dancing: dancing

133: Coach or Chanel: chanel 😅😂😏💚

132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: no

131: Small town or Big city: big city

130: Wal-Mart or Target: walmart

129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: adam

128: Manicure or Pedicure: pedicure

127: East Coast or West Coast: east

126: Your Birthday or Christmas: birthday

125: Chocolate or Flowers: flowers

124: Disney or Six Flags: six flags

123: Yankees or Red Sox: cardinals

[ Here’s What I Think About ]

122: War: no

121: George Bush: who is he? jk.

120: Gay Marriage: i think it’s gay

119: The presidential election: also gay

118: Abortion: pro choice

117: MySpace: middle school

116: Reality TV: dumb

115: Parents: they are good folk

114: Back stabbers: they stab backs. hoes.

113: Ebay: i sold a bat on here once & it was so much work

112: Facebook: slowly becoming obsolete in my life

111: Work: necessary

110: My Neighbors: the one who called the cops on me? she bad

109: Gas Prices: low thank the lord. knock on wood.

108: Designer Clothes: who cares

107: College: also necessary

106: Sports: i only really care about softball

105: My family: the madden’s are wild man

104: The future: looks pretty good 😏

[ Last time I ]

103: Hugged someone: uhmmm like the end of october ;(

102: Last time you ate: at 7

101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: uhm on ft with a bud the other day

100: Cried in front of someone: in my kitchen with my momma

99: Went to a movie theater: when chanel & i went to see hustlers

98: Took a vacation: junior year of hs

97: Swam in a pool: TOO long ago ;(

96: Changed a diaper: over a year ago

95: Got my nails done: never

94: Went to a wedding: probably like 2 years ago

93: Broke a bone: 6th grade

92: Got a peircing: 3 years ago

91: Broke the law: uh i was speeding ;(

90: Texted: just a minute ago

[ MISC ]

89: Who makes you laugh the most: that’s a toss up. i surround myself with laughter

88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: my boom boy

87: The last movie I saw: do i have to watch it to count it? coraline

86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: seeing my lil baby

85: The thing im not looking forward to: chelsey moving out ;(

84: People call me: shelby, shelb, shlub, bub, sheldon

83: The most difficult thing to do is: not overthink

82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: like 2 times 😅

81: My zodiac sign is: aquarius

80: The first person i talked to today was: my favorite girl, chanel.

79: First time you had a crush: uhmmm 6th grade? who knows.

78: The one person who i can’t hide things from: i would say chanel. she’s like a human lie detector.

77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: chanel & i do this shit all the time it’s freaky.

76: Right now I am talking to: like having a conversation with someone? everyone is asleep i believe

75: What are you going to do when you grow up: wait i’m not grown? crap.

74: I have/will get a job: i am a sub but i’d like to venture out a little

73: Tomorrow: i’m going to work out

72: Today: i’m about to crash

71: Next Summer: i’d like to be in a pool or in the sun a lot

70: Next Weekend: i couldn’t tell ya.

69: I have these pets: boomer & xeno

68: The worst sound in the world: my alarm

67: The person that makes me cry the most is: my dad

66: People that make you happy: my family, my baby & my friends

65: Last time I cried: uhhh couple days ago

64: My friends are: savannah, meg, aleigh, shelby, alex & lots more

63: My computer is: non existent

62: My School: nada at the moment

61: My Car: little dented 😂

60: I lose all respect for people who: beat on people mentally or physically

59: The movie I cried at was: oh shoot. i don’t do sad movies so i couldn’t tell you. but anytime an old person is sad i cry

58: Your hair color is: strawberry blonde

57: TV shows you watch: way too many to name but i’m on true blood right now

56: Favorite web site: pornhub

55: Your dream vacation: i want to go to italy

54: The worst pain I was ever in was: uhmmm i guess shoulder surgery? it wasn’t too awful

53: How do you like your steak cooked: medium rare

52: My room is: clean & gray

51: My favorite celebrity is: emma stone or jennifer lawrence 😏

50: Where would you like to be: anywhere with you 😏💚

49: Do you want children: yes!

48: Ever been in love: i am sooo yes

47: Who’s your best friend: i have three. savannah, meg & aleigh.

46: More guy friends or girl friends: girl friends

45: One thing that makes you feel great is: when boom cuddles me

44: One person that you wish you could see right now: hmmm my nanny wheeler 💕

43: Do you have a 5 year plan: yes! don’t die.

42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: ope. no but i should

41: Have you pre-named your children: yes

40: Last person I got mad at: uhmmm i hardly get mad but probably a sibling

39: I would like to move to: springfield

38: I wish I was a professional: softball player

[ My Favorites ]

37: Candy: orbit gun

36: Vehicle: nissan xterra

35: President: i could give a shit less

34: State visited: florida

33: Cellphone provider: verizon at the moment

32: Athlete: does lauren chamberlain count even though she’s retired?

31: Actor:ryan reynolds

30: Actress: his wife 😏

29: Singer: billie duh

28: Band: oh boy. uhm. coldplay

27: Clothing store: nike outlet or ross 😂

26: Grocery store: one with groceries

25: TV show: all time favorite? probably PLL

24: Movie: matilda

23: Website: again, pornhub. jk i couldn’t tell you.

22: Animal: elephant

21: Theme park: haven’t been to many soooo idk

20: Holiday: christmas or halloween

19: Sport to watch: softball

18: Sport to play: softball

17: Magazine: i don’t read them

16: Book: favorite book would be love her wild

15: Day of the week: friday

14: Beach: cancun mexico

13: Concert attended: ive been to shitty ones so negative

12: Thing to cook: pasta

11: Food: pasta

10: Restaurant: jap steak

9: Radio station: spotify 😂

8: Yankee candle scent: linen 😂

7: Perfume: cologne/chrome azarro

6: Flower: lillies

5: Color: purple

4: Talk show host: jimmy fallon

3: Comedian: ellen

2: Dog breed: yorkie but boom is my favorite

1: Did you answer all these truthfully? yes

1. Have you ever seen two movies at the theater in a row?  Nope.

2. If you were to go to Starbucks right this second, what do you think you'd order? Well, I wouldn’t cause it’s 12:02AM so it’s late and it’s closed, BUT I would get their smoked butterscotch latte that they have out right now. Sooo good.

3. Do you own any dice? That come with board games, yes.

4. Do you like to wear cardigans? I do.

5. If I were to ask you nicely, would you please consider making a survey for me and everyone else? No, sorry. I’m not creative enough to come up with questions.

6. What is the worst thing a child has ever done to you while you were babysitting? I’ve only babysat my lil bro and cousins, but man they used to fight and be bratty when they were kids. I would get so frustrated. I used the ol’, “If you don’t stop then I’m going to call mom!” bit, which didn’t always work.

7. If you wear contacts, do they tend to get really dry after only wearing them for just a couple hours? I don’t wear contacts. The idea of putting them on and taking them off freaks me out.

8. Have you ever watched any British television shows? I don’t think so, actually.

9. Do you own a nightgown? Yeah.

10. If you could get any pet right now, what would you? I’m not ready to get another pet right now, but when we do we would get another dog.

11. Have you played Grand Theft Auto: IV? If so, what do you think of it? I have not.

12. How often does your internet disconnect? Not often.

13. Have you ever actually been stuffed into a locker? No. I was actually worried about stuff like that before I entered high school cause of movies and shows I saw as a kid.

14. Do you / did you decorate the inside of your locker at school with stuff? I didn’t have a locker. I didn’t want one.

15. How many teenagers do you know who have babies? Currently none, but in a couple months I will.

16. Is there a fan in the room you're in right now? No.

17. Do you believe that chivalry is really dead? Nah. I’ve seen it, experienced it.

18. If you have one, what's your favorite novel by Chuck Palahniuk? I haven’t read any of his books.

19. Do you get your surveys from your subscriptions page or do you actually go to specific sites and search for them? Normally I just get them from fellow survey takers I follow on Tumblr, but sometimes no one is posting or I can’t find one I like or haven’t taken recently, so I search on Live Journal. That’s where this one came from.

20. How much is your cell phone bill each month? I’m apart of a family plan, and for three of us with our data plan and phones and such it’s like $200 and something. Pretty crazy.

21. And why the heck is Cingular now AT&T? I’m guessing AT&T bought them? It’s been that way for so long that I forgot. When I got my first cell phone it was Cingular.

22. Have you ever made a house out of a giant cardboard box? I might have as a kid, I don’t recall.

23. Have you ever made a tent out of sheets in your bedroom? Yesss. My cousins and I used to do that a lot.

24. What's the coolest thing you've made with Legos? Nothing cool. Just simple stuff.

25. When you make a survey, do you answer your own questions? I don’t make surveys, so.

26. If you could keep your parents or trade them for other parents, which would you pick? I would never trade my parents for anything in the world. They mean the world to me. My mom and I are especially close, she’s my rock. They’re my biggest support system. They have always been there, encouraging and supporting me along the way. They have been through all my ups and downs, and always will be.

27. Do kiwis make you think of testicles or is it just me? I remember when I was younger kids would call them monkey or gorilla balls or something. Kiwis just do not sound or look appealing to me.

28. Do you think it's cool how peroxide gets all fizzy when you put it on a cut? No.

29. Is there a piggy bank in the room you're in? Nope.

30. If I had to power to give you one thing right now, what would it be? A clean bill of health.

31. Do you want to get pregnant right now? NOOOOO.

32. Do you know anyone who doesn't like the internet? Yeah. Or people who don’t go on it that often or spend much time on it when they do. Just like a quick check in or so.  Or maybe they’re just normal and actually have lives. I spend an excessive amount online. Ha.

33. Do your grandparents know how to operate a cell phone? Yes, as they both have one and have had cell phones for a long time now. They both have iPhones. 

34. Have you ever housed a friend for a long period of time because they had no place to live? No.

35. If you have a favorite comedian, have they ever been in a movie? Kevin Hart has been in a shit ton of movies.

36. How many sets of twins do you know? I know of one.

37. Has anyone ever made fun of you for using proper grammar? Not make fun, but they’ll make comments about it because I use it even when I text. I’ve had people tell me how they can’t tell what tone I am using because I guess adding a period at the end makes it sound “serious”. Like when I put, “Okay.” my brother thinks I’m mad or something lol.

38. Do you own any hemp jewelry? No.

39. Have you ever cut carpet with a carpet cutter? Nope, nor have I ever cut carpet.

40. Are there any books you want to read? There’s a lot. I read using the Kindle app, and I have a Kindle Unlimited account. I can access a ton of books through that, so whenever I finish one I look for another. It recommends me books based on what I read previously and such. There’s always something for me to read.

41. Is it before of after 3 pm? It's 12:34AM, so that makes it way before 3PM.

42. If you have younger siblings, are you very protective of them? Yes I am.

43. If you have older siblings, are they very protective of you? I wouldn’t say very protective, no. Not that they don’t care or that we have a bad relationship, it’s just that we aren’t as close as my younger brother and I because we didn’t grow up together.

44. What are your plans for New Year's Eve? New Year’s Eve was just another day. I was not in the celebratory mood whatsoever. Last year was awful, and just a week before my dog passed away. I didn’t give a shit about New Year’s Eve.

45. Would you like a beer? Ew, no.

Everything I have ever tried from The Ordinary / Deciem: A review. Part 2 (Vitamin C)

SOOOOHOHOHOOO, Faye ~^.^~ has more followers than @madhautblog on Instagram but we are CLOSING IN FAST, TEAM.

Let’s get right into it. Here’s my feedback on the Vitamin Cs. Best consumed with big ole’ glass of OJ (add what you will). 

The Ordinary #VitaminC

Vitamin C Suspension 30% in Silicone (Serum or combine with moisturizer) I cautiously say this is the “serum” step because that’s how I used it at the time. Since then, I do not use products with silicones on my face. Beautyeditor has a terrific article on this but, long story short, silicones cause pore congestion. Anything else you put on top of a product with silicones has a much harder time getting to your skin. This product has a gritty texture, and it might actually work best as a post-moisturizer spot treatment, now that I think of it.

I didn’t know about silicones when I got this product and started using it, but what attracted me to it is the 30% concentration - this is one of the highest concentrations I have seen. At this level of potency, skincare companies really consider the delivery vehicle and packaging of the product, because Vitamin C “oxidizes” and is basically prone to spoiling in many watery/serum-based forms, especially in higher concentrations. 

More notes on oxidation --> It is my opinion that Vitamin C serum should be clear or very close to clear. This way, you can tell when it is spoiled, because it will have turned dark yellow or orange. Throw it away if it even gets close to that color (if it was clear to begin with). You would be harming your skin to apply an oxidized Vitamin C serum - it will literally produce the opposite of the intended effect. Anyway, products with a silicone base offer a much more stable way to package and provide Vitamin C, so this 30% formula is well-supported.

As an aside, I was recently at a Sephora in CT, and informed one of their retail floor reps about the Vitamin-C-serum-has-expired-if-it-turns-darker rule. I also saw this comment in one of Deciem's Facebook skincare forums: "I’m new to this group and you all seem to know a lot about The ordinary products ! I’d love to order some but I have no idea what to choose for myself ! Even though I worked at Sephora for 5 years the concept baffles me abit lol." I mention this not to toot my own horn, but to caution you to be aware of what you're being sold and whose advice you take, especially if someone is trying to sell you something. 

Back to Vitamin C Suspension 30% in Silicone.... The juice, my friends, is not worth the squeeze on this product. My advice is to SKIP this and to not apply products with silicones to your face.

100% L-Ascorbic Acid Powder (Serum) This powder comes with a small, plastic scooper and should be mixed with another serum, oil, essence, or emulsion to make it into a serum. There is not a ton of guidance on how much powder to use and I am frankly too lazy to try and figure out the rough concentration % of the concoction that works for me - but it’s one scoop of this LAA powder mixed with one full dropper of Marine Hyaluronics. Since oxidation is a constant concern with Vitamin C, I like the idea of making my own fresh batch from time to time. Alternatively, sometimes I’ll add half a scoop of this powder to my suncreen/moisturizer day routine, but in this case I use more moisturizer than usual, so the finish isn’t gritty. It’s pure, tried-and-true L-Ascorbic Acid, the natural -- but also the least stable -- form of Vitamin C. This form, is, however, much more stable as a powder. Recommended.

(Not The Ordinary) Hylamide Booster C25 (Serum) This is my favorite Vitamin C product from Deciem and my go-to VC overall. I love the texture and love that it contains EAA - ethylated ascorbic acid - which is an extremely stable Vitamin C derivative. “C25″ means it has a 25% concentration, which is in the higher-range. It’s perfectly clear and I love the texture. There’s a slight tingle so I know it’s working, and I find myself adding a drop or two of it to many of my serum or moisturizer/SPF steps.

My overall Vitamin C theory and recommendations (Deciem and not):

This is partially backed up by research and fully backed up by my own personal experience. People use Vitamin C products on their face to brighten and even their complexion, fade dark spots/hyperpigmentation, shield skin from pollution, boost collagen production and help prevent/treat photodamage. 

With all of these amazing benefits it’s easy to reach for the highest Vitamin C concentration serum you can find. But there are good reasons to typically aim for products in the 10-15% concentration range, and I have *generally* had better results with concentrations in this range.

1. Vitamin C is finicky and spoils easily especially at higher concentrations. 2. You want the pH level of your Vitamin C serum to be between 2.5 and 4. Often times, serums with concentrations higher than 20% LAA have a pH too low and far away from the skin’s natural pH (5.5 - slightly acidic), which can cause irritation with no extra benefit. Much of the online research indicates that maximum absorbtion seems to happen with 20% Vitamin C, and higher concentrations yield extra that is filtered out and not used.

A few product proof points and other notes: 

SkinCeuticals C E Ferulic: widely loved. 15% LAA with a couple common booster ingredients (ferulic acid, vitamin E). This brand has my respect but WHY $166 for 30 mls!? If this works for you and it’s your holy grail, mad respect, it just seems like robbery.

Klairs Freshly Juiced Vitamin C Serum: year-over-year best-seller on Sokoglam and my gateway to vitamin C serums. It’s one of the only serums I bought more than once. I could have sworn it used to have 15% concentation but it says 5% here. Anyway, this serum evened out my skin tone and got rid of some small dark spots in record time; I recommend it to anyone starting out with Vitamin C serums. It’s gentle but effective and has the perfect serum texture. $23.

The Ordinary Ascorbyl Glucoside Solution 12%: their website explains the stability and potency of this product well so I won’t regurgitate. It has the highest review rating out of any of The Ordinary’s Vitamin C’s (except for the pure LAA powder ;) ). I have recommended this to many friends who all love it. $12.90.

I’d be interested to try the new The Ordinary Ascorbic Acid 8% + Alpha Arbutin 2% ($10). I don’t need a product like this right now but I recommend it based on the ingredients list since Alpha Arbutin is also known to reduce the look of dark spots and hyperpigmentation. I bet the new The Ordinary Ethylated Ascorbic Acid 15% Solution ($18) is also a winner (extra stable and nice concentration).

Hylamide C25: I already wrote about this above, and I know that its 25% is higher than both the 15% and 20% magic numbers I have been mentioning. I just want to point out that because the Vitamin C in this product is ethylated, it is more stable (and yields less irritation) at the higher concentration. This product also has a very high review rating on their site - I trust these. $27.

Finally. Store your Vitamin C serums in your fridge, with the cap screwed on tightly. Limit the amount of time the serum is exposed to air and light. Write the date you unboxed your serum in permanent marker on the bottle. All of these steps will help ensure you’re not using a spoiled product, which, again, produces the OPPOSITE of the intended effects of a Vitamin C serum and HARMS your skin!

Ok, that’s all for the Vitamin C post. Direct Acids are next - I have sooo much to say here.

I’ll try to post more. . . . 

Thanks for reading! Let me know if you have questions.

In good skin health,

Maddie

Last Night:

Tatcha Pure One Step Camellia Cleansing Oil (Oil cleanser) Neogen Green Tea Real Fresh Foam Cleanser (Water cleanser) The Ordinary 100% Organic Cold-Pressed Rose Hip Seed Oil (Treat/protect a dry spot) Biologique Recherche Lotion P50 Original 1970 (Toner/exfoliant) Kiehl’s Rosa Arctica Eye Balm (Eye cream) The Ordinary Natural Moisturizing Factors mixed with Biologique Recherche Creme Dermopurifiante (Moisturizer) Kiehl’s Clearly Corrective Dark Spot Solution (Spot treatment)

This Morning (kept it simple):

Neogen Real Fresh Green Tea Cleansing Stick (Twice for double-cleanse) The Ordinary Natural Moisturizing Factors mixed with Biologique Recherche Creme Dermopurifiante and Missha Waterproof Sun Milk SPF 50 (Moisturizer+SPF)

Where can i find the cheapest insurance quote for a 95 Dodge neon?

"Where can i find the cheapest insurance quote for a 95 Dodge neon?

I pay 140$ a month at dairy land Proggresive, I have about 10 points on my liscense, and when are my liscence points deleted from my insurance

BEST ANSWER:  Try this site where you can compare quotes: : http://financeandcreditsolution.xyz/index.html?src=tumblr 

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2 week ago I was in auto accident in NYC but I live in New Jersey a greyhound bus hit my parked car door as I opened it, I had a clear of view when i opened it, my car is beyond damaged (97 Honda Accord) thank god I didn't lose my hand, I finally got a official police report, I have the greyhound bus driver licence plate #'s and insurance policy #'s and the insurance code Texas Liability Insurance (not the insurance company name) I called Grey Bus company customer service and corporate office based out of Texas, both phone numbers keep giving me the run around and is a complete waste of time. I called my insurance, and they cant help me , i try google, waste of time as well, please help, all i am trying to do is file a claim and fix my car ASAP!!""

Best Dental Insurance Plan?

Hey Yahoo! Answers Readers, I am 26 years-old and unfortunately have a terrible smile with bad teeth. I am in need of major dental work. [Fillings, crowns, extractions, etc.] Does anyone know of what the best insurance plan would be for me? Please help me find plans that do not require waiting periods, so I can get work done ASAP! I live in Florida. I briefly checked out the new Government Marketplace, but I wasn't sure if any of the dental plans allowed immediate restorative services. Also, from what I briefly read, most of the plans only pay like a Maximum of $1000 per calendar year, which really isn't very much. Dental work costs a lot of money! Thanks for your help guys! -Zach :)""

What is cheapest car insurance i am 18 years old with a crash?

i need the cheapest car insurance in florida can some one refer me to a company

How much would the insurance cost on a 2002 Lamborghini Murcielago VT ?

full coverage

Do i have to have insurance on my cycle or car.?

So i know it is best to have insurance but i was wondering is it an absolute must, like can i have a car and drive it legally with out insurance?""

Insurance for a new driver?

I'm hoping to get my driver's license this summer (am over eighteen) but do not plan to drive in the near future since the college I'll be attending next year does not allow freshmen to have cars. Does the insurance requirement for taking the behind-the-wheel exam in CA require proof of an insurance contract under my name, or is it just the vehicle I test with have to be insured? Could I borrow my parents' car for the exam and not get insurance for myself?""

Can a Canadian Citizen buy car insurance in America and how?

Is it possible for a canadian citizen to buy car insurance in america, if so, how does he do that? My brother lives in america and I live in canada, I want to get car insurance from America as it is cheaper. Is that possible and is it legal?""

What life insurance policy should I get?

I have the option of variable whole life, whole life, and term life. I know term life is the best, but i am only 18 and i don't have time to go out and invest in mutual funds unless its really easy and quick. I am a college student, and I have no income. I am planning on becoming a nurse, but of course that is not guarenteed. Which one should I get and why? Please don't just say don't get whole life! it sucks yeah i know that but i need details. Also what about for my parents who are in their early 60's . Which one should they get??""

Car accident and insurance?

My friend's car got hit from behind on the freeway and she only got libilities so her insurance doesn't pay to fix her car. The guy who hit her is a teen and his insurance is under his mom's name. His insurance is paying only $10,000 maxium. The cost for total fixing is going to be $13,561. My friend can't pay the difference of $3,561. Now what can she do? Is that the responsiblity of the guy who hit her? should he be the one to come up with the rest of the money? or is she out of luck? The car is in the collision center now. She's losing sleep and having headaches and sore neck, etc.. and missing work... and she still hasn't go see a doctor. Any advice for this poor girl?""

Cheap insurance in NC for a young driver?

- I am 19, had a license for 9 months. - I have had auto insurance one time for a month just to get my license (does that mean a lapse in insurance) - I want a non owners policy, so I can go get a car at a dealership - I am a girl - I have had""

Where can i find the cheapest insurance quote for a 95 Dodge neon?

I pay 140$ a month at dairy land Proggresive, I have about 10 points on my liscense, and when are my liscence points deleted from my insurance

""I have three inflatable jumpers, do I need to have liability insurance?""

Well I just bought three jumpers to start my own business, but I'm wondering if I need liability insurance and permit? In the state of California, please help""

Is it best to cancel your car insurance or have the company cancel you out?

i paid for car insurance for 6 months and now i fould cheaper insurance. should i cancel my insurance or have them cancel it for me. which will cost me more money

How much is insurance for a 16 year old girl with good grades?

Im 16 years old and wanting to get my licence. I have about a 3.4 GPA. And im not going to take drivers ed. I am going to share a car with my parents as well.They have really good credit. With geico. How much will it cost a month?

Confused.com form for car insurance?

Im looking to purchase an audi s3 and im 21, however the insurance is too much so what im thinking is to buy the car and then insure the car to my dads name so he can drive it for a year or 2 (I WONT BE INSURED ON IT) until i can be insured on it. My question is, on confused.com it asks when did you purchase the vehicle? And if i put say 2 years ago the price of the insurance drops compared to if i brought it say today. Is it ok to do this? When they ask when did you purcahse the car can i say 2 years ago? Hope this makes sense if you use confused.com you will know what i mean. Im really enthusiastic about audis and in particular the s3, im looking to join the members club online. So will this work to lower my insurance when i want to insure myself on it? Also what will be the deal with the registered keeper and owner of the vehicle? Would that be me? Even though my dad would be the person insured on the vehicle? I know im trying to obtain cheaper insurance but if i dont drive it for 2 years i dont see a problem in this. any ideas? What if my dad is the registered owner then registers it to me in 2 years will i have to say i brought the car 2 years ago or when my dad registers it over to me?""

""2007 Mercedes S-class fuel consumption, reliability, maintenance?""

If you're 60 years old in Canada, with a great driving record, how much should insurance cost per year more or less? Also, if you drive 20,000km annually, how much should fuel cost? And is this car reliable? How much would you expect to spend on maintenance costs over the next 5 years? It has 70,000km and costs $36,000 also, is this a good price? Lots of questions I know, but thanks so much""

What is a good first car that would have low insurance rates?

What is a good first car that would have low insurance rates?

Which insurance company is the cheapest for a 2002 toyota echo?? Thanks again Dan?

Its for basic coverage

Driving family car with no insurance?

I Drive my sister's car around a bit because i couldn't afford my insurance. Since I don't have insurance but my sister does on her car, would I get a ticket or get car towed if I drive it around without insurance? or would my sister's insurance cover it too? Thanks""

Am I going to be late on my car insurance?

My car insurance is due tomorrow. I ended up setting up a payment for it online today but the payment won't transfer until the 22nd. Will this be considered late for my insurance ...show more

""How much is average for childcare? I have a 4 year old, a 2 year old and a 8mth old. About 8 hr/5days a week?""

I'll explain a little more. I own a duplex which I rent out the top of while my husband and I live down stairs. The renters upstairs have been my friends for a long time and they needed an apartment so we rented to them for $535 a month. After a year we agreed to trade daycare for rent so I could go back to work full time. The arangment has gone from no cash exchanged to us paying their car insurance ($90/month) the water bill ($50/month), the hot water ($35/month), an extra $190 in cash per month along with the no rent income ($535/month). We also give them about $60 in random cash when they ask for help. I provide the formula, diapers and wipes and she provides the food. The kids are upstairs from 11am to 5:30pm and she refuses to take them earlier even though if she did I could get a better schedual. I trust the woman and her son is the same age as my oldest. But there are also some serious disipline issues too. (My four year old now says bad words.) I need some advice""

Cheap motor insurance?

hi everyone... my hubby is tinkin of getting a new mitsubishi lancer sports edition (A) as a weekend car. only problem is insurance. he's 24yrs old n just got his license a week ago. he's been ridin a bike for the past 4yrs but insurance companies say it is not counted as driving experience. N their quotaions are arnd $4k which is very ex... any help will be greatly appreciated thx:)

Is Progressive a good auto Insurance provider?

I have used Geico for years. I have been extremely satisfied with their service. However, my premium is still more than I want to pay. I got a quote for Progressive and it is considerably less. Anyone out there have Progressive and satisfied with them? How have they handled claims in the past? Any other good, reasonably priced auto insurance companies?""

How much will my insurance go up if I am at 100% fault ?

I was in a car accident that was found to be 100% my fault. Accident itself was not too bad -- other car's front bumper( one side) dent.. so how much should I expect my insurance to increase ?

Cheapest insurers for a first time 18yrold with pass plus??

Hi iv'e just brought a 2002 vw polo and wanted to get my first insurance on it. Can you recommend any cheap insurers for first time drivers and young drivers. I've completed my pass plus as well. Thanks for the help xxx

Car insurance help please?

so i stoped by at state farm agency last week and got a quote, she told told me to call her the next day if i wanted it. So i called and told her that i want it. They havent sent me my card in the mail yet. Last night i was in my neighborhood coming back home and this guy opened his door and hit the front of my car. The cop asked for my license and proof of insurance, i gave him the license and told him that i havent got the insurance card yet. He is giving me till tonight to provide it but when i called state farm they told me that i am not insured and that i have to call on Monday to talk to that same lady that i talked to when i got i. I dont know what to do, i have nevr been in a situation like this before. Please help""

I was speeding 16 mph over the limit and it is my first offense. how much will my fine be?

I am 17 and I was driving my parents car, under their insurance. how much do you think my fine will be? and will my parents insurance rates go up if I go to the court date, plead guilty, pay the fine, and go to traffic/driving school?""

""If I already have health insurance, but get hired somewhere where they also have health insurance as a benefit?""

does that mean I HAVE to have their insurance? I want to keep my own insurance, which is under my parents health insurance.""

What's the average price of a Doctor's visit without health insurance?

My eyes are yellow.

Is there any affordable insurance plans I can get in NJ( South NJ )?

Particularly Dental Insurance. I am 20,a Part-time worker who also goes to college full time. I am not covered by my parents nor have I ever had insurance. I am one of the many Americans who do not recieve proper health care due to low income however I do need to get Dental Insurance, and Health Insurance. Is there any reasonable companies to look into?""

""Mustang Insurance, Help!!!?""

Hello, I have a quick question about insurance. I am 18 years old, living in Orange, CA and currently driving a 2003 nissan altima that I am going to trade for a 2002 ford mustang gt. Now i know that contacting an agent will be the best way to find out more realistic rates, but right now I want to hear from past mustang owners. I was also wondering if having good credit will give me a discount on my insurance? I know insurance will be high, so don't waste my time explaining it to me, If it helps, I always obey the speed limit, never gotten into any crashes nor have I gotten any tickets. All Help is appreciated, thanks.""

Will insurance rate rise...?

I'm a sixteen year old driver in Florida and a few weeks ago I accidentally bumped into someone's car. The damage on both cars was very minimal and the other driver has not done anything. A cop, however, did write me a ticket. I'm wondering what effect (if any) this will have on my insurance rate seeing as it is my first ticket, and how or if I could avoid this by getting the points off my license. Thank you very much.""

Car insurance rate differences between the years question?

Okay, I'm almost going to be looking for car soon, and I'm wondering, since I'll only be a 16 year old boy, insurance will be really damn high for me, and I was curious, say you have two cars of the same model, trim, style, transmission, driving record, miles, engine wear, etc. One car is something made in the late eighties or early nineties while the other car is late nineties or early 2000s. What I basically want to know, is, which car would have a cheaper insurance premium? (approximately. I know you cant give me an exact number.)""

Looking for a Psychiatrist who accepts Medicare Insurance?

I have bipolar disorder and need a psychiatrist who accepts Medicare Insurance a.s.a.p. Please include doctor's name/phone #, my area is (818), San Fernando Valley, Encino, California. Also, I would like to make new friends who are dealing with bipolar disorder. Thank you.""

Effects of Multiple Sclerosis on car insurance?

A friend of mine was diagnosed with relapsing remitting MS just over a year ago. She had several bad relapses one after another but was then put on tysabri and has been getting better and better since then. She now feels ready to start driving again but is worried her insurance will be through the roof. She is in good health now and because of the tysabri is not likely to have a relapse again for at least a couple of years. Does anyone have any experience of trying to get car insurance if you have MS?

Auto Insurance Price?

Does anyone have a rough estimate of how much my auto insurance would cost per year? I'm a 19 year old female purchasing a 2000 Toyota camry.

Where can i find the cheapest insurance quote for a 95 Dodge neon?

I pay 140$ a month at dairy land Proggresive, I have about 10 points on my liscense, and when are my liscence points deleted from my insurance

How much is monthly insurance rates?

What are the things you pay insurance for and how much...

About car insurance what will happen?

okay so a few days ago i was driving my breaks dident stop in time it was very slow and i wasent going that fast at all my breaks dident stop in time and i left a very very lil scrab on a guys car and he said if i cant get 220 dollars by tomorow he will call my moms car insurance will that make the price higher?

What is the average cost for insurance on a 2009 Yamaha R6?

Im going to get it tomorrow. I am almost 19, and i have one accident. I think it was a fault from both drivers. not sure. just let me know what you are paying and on what kind of bike thanks.""

How much is a motor insurance?

I have no idea of how much my motor insurance cost if I buy a car in UK. I have a driving license for 10+ years and have no background accidents.... any sample quote are welcome.

Where can I get non-owners insurance in New Jersey?

I dont own a car, but I rent about once a week, and would rather not have to take out liability insurance each time.""

On average how much would a body kit raise insurance?

Like on a mustang! Thank you for your time and may God bless you :)<3

How would my insurance company know this if I don't tell them?

I am getting ready to buy a home (Already selected, move in will be next week) and I own a German Shepard. I am currently shopping for homeowners insurance, and I know that many companies will not insure you if you have an aggressive breed of dog, and the ones that do will give you higher rates because of it. So I was wondering, what reason do I have to tell them that I have an aggressive breed? When they come to inspect the home, my friend down the street can watch my dog for a few hours. If I were to just leave out the fact that I have an aggressive breed so my rates will stay low, how would the insurance company ever be the wiser? PS: This IS a repost. Last time I asked everyone said Well it's misrepresentation and if you have ever have to make a claim, then they can deny you because you lied about the dog. Yes I understand what the consequences would be, that wasn't the question. My question is HOW could they ever find out in the first place? If I have to make a claim for say, a fire, then I could have someone take my dog for a few hours again and make the claim without having any reason to mention the dog? So how would they ever know?""

How does the new 1-50 insurance group rating work?

Ive read that most cars insurance group will more or less double But what I want to know is if 2 cars are group 5 under the old rating and one goes up to 11 and the other only to 7 does that mean the 7 will cost less to insure than the original or will 7 be about the same and 11 be more? sorry if this didnt make sense. 10 points to anybody who can answer?

Health Insurance for 25 Year Old Disabled Male?

I'm 23 years old and I live in California. I work full time but only make $8 an hour. My husband is 25 and has been disabled since age 12. He has a serious back injury and may be paralyzed one day and he cannot work. If this ever happens, I really don't want to be $1 million dollars in debt because we are uninsured. I have never bought health insurance before and I have NO IDEA what I am doing. I'm looking for insurance that will cover him if he needs to go to the emergency rooom, needs an operation or will cover him if he does indeed become paralyzed. Where do I start? What are our options? Will he be denied because of a pre existing condition? I don't care what I have to pay, I just want him to be insured. We don't want to go throught the process of getting him SSI because we don't want to be poor forever and if I make over a certain amount he will lose everything. Thanks for your help, I REALLY appreciate it.""

If my 17 year old son moves to another state will my medical insurance still cover him?

my son is planning on moving to california and he is a type one diabetic. so im wondering if he's in another state than i am if my insurance will cover him.

How much is insurance for a honda accord coupe v6 ?

I'm 18 yrs old and I'm considering buying this car if insurance isn't bad

How do you pay an insurance deductible?

Well i sadly wrecked my car today i have full coverage because i have a loan from a bank and im still making payments on it. I let the insurance company know. But my deductible is $1,000.00 and i dont have a thousand dollars. Can you like make cheap payments on that or do you need it all upfront? Or do i not have to pay it right away?""

Things that could lower my insurance rate?

I am most likely buying a 2001 ford mustang: -v6 engine, 5 speed manual 140,000k miles 2 seater it has a stage 4 racing clutch, its blacked out.. paint, rims, tinted windows, (headlights might have a tint idk tho) i am a sophomore in highschool, i have never received anything lower than a B, and my gpa is a 3.75. i want to know as many things that i can get done to this car in order to force the insurance rate down: iv heard of theft systems and keeping grades low.. but what else? i was thinking of getting a bluetooth? thanks""

""Cheapest motorcycle for a 20-21 year old. Parameters: price, fuel economy, and insurance. Please help?""

I am 20 years old but will be turning 21 in late spring, and i was planning to buy a motorcycle with my tax return coming up (down payment and first/few insurance payments depending on whether i go monthly or biyearly). I was wondering what the Y!A community thought would be the cheapest on me when it comes to balancing initial price, fuel economy, and insurance prices for someone my age. I was thinking a moderately powered large roadster-style bike (i'm reluctant to say chopper...i hate that word) that doesn't go too much above freeway speeds, but i'm open to hearing other people's suggestions. I'm from southern illinois, and am a large guy, but not giant. No crotch-rockets please.""

What is an affordable health care provider with low deductable?

What is an affordable health care provider with low deductable?

Do you have to be on the insurance of the car you use for your drivers license test?

I know the car you use has to have insurance but do you, the driver, have to be on that policy?""

How long does it take for car insurance to lower rates?

I have been with GEICO auto insurance for roughly 1year and then another approximately 4-5years. I had a break due to joining the military. At this time i receive coverages every 6 months. The problem i have with GEICO is that i been paying just about the same since I started and just recently my rate went down only 20 dollars. I have been in one accident with an elderly who passed a stop sign, a speeding ticket of driving 35 on a 25 and i believe two seat belt tickets. Nothing in the last two years or more. What do i do to get my rates lowered without effecting the quality of coverage. When do insurance companies lower their rates??""

""What do you want, universal health care or affordable health insurance??""

What do you want, universal health care or affordable health insurance??""

""Can someone suggest a good fertiltiy clinic in the Bay Area, California? What Insurance is good?

Has anyone researched on success rate of fertility clinic in Bay Area? Which are the top / best ones? Also what type of insurance should I take up to ensure everything is paid for? Did anyone use Kaiser Vs Aetna?

I do not have auto insurance and my license is suspended (child support). I live in California?

Is the other driver still responsible to pay for damages to my car? He has insurance. What do I do first? Thank you for your help

How much is insurance for an 18 year old?

Who lives in Kentucky and wants to find a car that's cheap but will get him around without breaking down. Know what I mean? He has $2,100 out of college money to help pay until January. Then he gets more o.o So what do you think? What should my friend do?""

""Where can i get $100,000 of renter's insurance coverage at the cheapest rate?""

Where can i get $100,000 of renter's insurance coverage at the cheapest rate?""

Is it illegal to drive a car thats not yours without insurance?

I need to know if it is legal to drive someone elses car even if i dont have car insurance but the owner of the car does i dont own a car but my half brother does and lets me use it the only problem is i don't have insurance is it still illegal for me to drive this car i do have a valid license this is in Ohio

Adding teenager to car insurance?

I'm turning 16 in a few months and my parents said if i paid for the extra cost they would put me on their policy and i was wondering how much money it would be

Home and contents insurance application form?

i need one of these for my commerce assignment where can i get one from.

Where can i find the cheapest insurance quote for a 95 Dodge neon?

I pay 140$ a month at dairy land Proggresive, I have about 10 points on my liscense, and when are my liscence points deleted from my insurance

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/help-buy-auto-insurance-beland-rajka"