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fredwkong · 3 months

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Himbo Maker: Misha

Misha was an Egirl: a European Guy In Real Life. He would do his makeup, put on fake eyelashes, a wig, and a pair of pink headphones with kitty cat ears, and stream video games online. He loved to troll new viewers by spending an hour or so doing a breathy, feminine voice, and then suddenly hit them with his natural Baltic baritone. The way the chat went crazy made it worth it every time.

The whole game was helped by how petit and curvy Misha had always been. Even in his twenties, he still had a soft, almost girlish body and stood at most of other guys’ sternums. Too bad he wasn’t a trans girl, or at least a gay boy, he sometimes thought, looking at his body in the mirror. Gay guys were supposed to go for little guys who looked like him.

One evening, Misha was just starting his stream when some user started acting really weird in chat. He had a username that almost seemed familiar to Misha, but the guy he was thinking of had always been polite and given insightful comments on Misha’s gaming. This guy’s messages were full of typos, and he couldn’t seem to stop talking about his muscles.

Misha was just about to ban the guy when an alert sounded: Misha’s charming, girly laugh, which indicated a user had just donated a hefty sum. Of course, it was this annoying brodude.

“Uh,” said Misha, almost forgetting to put on his femmy voice, “He says, “Bro, this guy liek wants to chat wiht u on stream.” And there’s a link in the donation.”

Clicking the link, Misha found himself looking at a chat website he’d never seen before. “Hold on, let me share my screen,” he simpered, sharing the chat window. Somehow, his usual screen name was already in the bar. It must have populated from his stream.

Mish-kittycat: Like, heyoooo! You okay with being on stream with me? (✿◠‿◠)

Himbo_mkr: No way, bruh! I love meeting new bros. Like, hi stream!

Misha was a bit offended that this chat partner would refer to him as a “bro.” But stream chat seemed interested, so he thought it could be worth a few minutes to humour the donater. It had been a fair amount of money.

Mish-kittycat: What do you want to talk about UwU

Himbo_mkr: Bro, you know that all I ever talk about are my sick gains and going out with guys, lmao

Okay, so this was a troll. They probably wanted to get Misha banned for lewdness or something. Still, at least it was original that the troll character was a gay guy. He rolled his eyes at the stream and said, out loud in his girl voice, “Looks like someone got mad enough to pay to speak with all this.” He gestured down his slim body in tonight’s outfit, a stereotypical Japanese maid costume.

Himbo_mkr: Huhuhu, bro, you clicked on the link. Didn’t force you to do it.

Misha froze. Of course the troll was watching the stream. “Heh, I don’t let meatheaded bullies boss me around,” he chirped, trying to save face.

Himbo_mkr: You sure? You sure like it when your chat bosses you around, bro.

Now this guy was just lying. Misha scowled, even though he knew the expression would make his foundation crack unattractively. “This is a really weird way to bully someone.” He looked at the stream chat, waiting for his subscribers to back him up.

But the character of the chat seemed to have changed. No, they had always been bossy, Misha suddenly remembered. They would tell Misha how to play his games all the time while he pretended to struggle. It was a key part of the dynamic of his channel that chat bossed him around, and right now they were telling him to go back to chatting with this guy. One guy even messaged, “No more talking, kitty. You’re only allowed to write in the chat.” Misha gave the camera a plaintive look, but listened. He always listened to his chat.

Mish-kittycat: So maybe you’re right about that one thing, but coming in here being rude is totally uncool (งᓀ‸ᓂ)ง

Himbo_mkr: Bro, I think we got off on the wrong foot. I was just tryna compliment you on your sick bis, dude.

Misha cocked his head, confused. He was the opposite of buff, that was why he was so good at dressing as a girl. But as he continued to think about it, he remembered all the hours he spent working on his arms. He kept a set of weights next to his bedroom door, and he did bicep curls to failure every time he went through the doorway. Yeah, his biceps were his pride and joy, and they were usually how he showed off his manliness when he revealed his deep voice and accent.

A tip came in. “Flex for us, kitty,” commanded the text-to-speech voice. With a smirk, Misha lifted up one of his arms, feeling it stretch the sleeve of his maid costume as the veins popped. Too bad the rest of his body hadn’t followed his arms and gotten bulky.

Himbo_mkr: We’re all waiting for you to drop your lifting routine, bro! You’ve been totally blowing up.

Misha blushed at the flattery. His physique wasn’t all that impressive. Sure, now that he thought about it, he had been really hitting the weights a lot and eating right. In fact, his room seemed to be full of lifting clothes and supplements as he looked around. But that was because some of his subscribers kept telling him to get to the gym and hit his macros. It had actually been really freeing to just let people pay to tell him what to do on his fitness journey. And it was paying off! Misha definitely couldn’t pass for a girl these days, which was why the channel had changed to be more about doing stuff in-game for the highest bidders.

The maid costume barely wrapped around Misha’s broad pecs, and the garters had torn when he’d tried to pull them up his thick thighs. Sure, it had been funny when the stream started and the chat had gotten Misha to show off his shoulder raises while dressed in a little maid skirt, but the polyester was really starting to chafe on his smooth muscles. It was a relief when a tip rolled in while Misha flexed and said “Kitty, wear comfy clothes.” The chat oooohed and aaaahed as Misha shucked the maid costume, showing off his bulky chest, and pulled on his favourite comfy shirt instead. Sure, it had some tears and stuff, but as a masculine guy, Misha wasn’t worried about dressing up fancy or anything.

The guy whose chat Misha was streaming had been quiet, so Misha hopped back over and sent another message.

Mish-kittyhunk: Thanks man! It’s all about trusting the process.

Himbo_mkr: I can tell that you trust people, bro! You’re like a puppy lmao.

Well, Misha thought, maybe he did like getting bossed around in chat, but it wasn’t like he trusted everyone blindly! Okay, well, maybe he did tend to stop to help people on the road and then lose his wallet a lot. They looked like they needed help! And maybe he did sometimes click on links that meant he needed to take his phone to the store for them to fix, but so did everyone else!

Looking at the chat, who were all laughing about Misha being a totally trusting puppy, Misha had to finally agree. That was why one of his subscribers had gotten him this headset with floppy dog ears on it, after all.

Mish-puphunk: Haha, you got me, dude! That’s why I clicked on this link, too XD

Himbo_mkr: It’s okay, bro. Lots of gay hunks are pretty dumb, it just adds to that himbo appeal.

This time this guy was definitely making stuff up. Misha was totally straight, he just didn’t do well with girls. Well, that and being a submissive hunk online mostly attracted a gay male fanbase. And, well, now that he thought about it, when was the last time Misha had really thought about a girl? Like, maybe if it was a domme? But no, even then, Misha would really prefer a guy to be involved at some point. This guy was probably right, Misha was gay.

It was super hard to think. There was a reason that Misha preferred to let chat do the thinking for him. Even before he realised how much he loved to listen when men told him what to do, Misha had never been much of a deep thinker. That was why most of the stuff in his room was gym gear, gaming stuff, or whatever his subscribers bought for him. Lately, they had been really loving when Misha wore even less clothes and showed off more of his growing body, and Misha was happy to oblige as long as they kept telling him what to do!

Mish-puphunk: Lol I guess you’re right! I just wanna give sirs what they want

Himbo_mkr: Bro, I totally get why you love pup play so much. You just love being obedient and dumb and empty lmao. You, like, pretty much live in your mask these days.

A pup mask…Misha was pretty sure one of his subscribers had sent him one of those once, but it had been really confusing to put on and he’d only worn it once. No, wait, that wasn’t right. Misha was such a ditz! He’d loved the experience of putting on the pup mask and letting himself be a dumb pup for his chat. And chat had loved sending in tips to give him commands like “sit,” “roll over,” and “stick a tail in your hole.”

It had been so popular that the subscribers had told Misha to make it a weekly thing, then a biweekly thing, and by now it had pretty much become what Misha did during his streams. While chatting with this guy had been fun, Misha really wanted to get on with the stream and mask up. He opened his mouth to tell the viewers that, but then remembered that he had been ordered not to talk. Too bad, chat would only hear his deep, resonant voice if they ordered him to bark after he put on his mask.

Mish-puphunk: Okay dude, I gotta go be a good dumb pup now.

Himbo_mkr: Got it, bruh! You got a bunch of hunky doms to please by being a good pup slut!

Chat cheered as Misha stopped streaming the chat window and winked at the camera. An especially hung dom who loved to tip had won the bid war last night to decide what Misha wore, so Misha fondled the straps of his leather harness as he got up to grab his mask. He wondered what his chat full of muscular, horny himbo doms would have him do today.

Misha slipped on the mask and let his mind go blank.

#male transformation #mental change #male tf #muscle tf #reality change #dumber tf #himbofication #himbo maker #pup tf #sub tf #all fwkong

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moon-tell-me · 4 months

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Them having a crush on you...

The outsiders (separate) x GN! reader

Warnings: nothing I don't think :))

DARRY CURTIS

It's been a reaalllyy long time since he's felt this way for anyone

So a small part of him is excited when he realizes it

But the majority of him..?

Well.. that's a different story

He's very busy with work and the family

He just doesn't have any time for love or romance

You understand ://

So it's unlikely he will do much of anything on his own

He will probably even avoid you a bit in hopes of making himself feel better

That being said, if you realize what's going on, and decide to pursue the relationship, he may manage to fit you in his schedule :))

"Hey, Darry.. uhm, could we talk for a second..?" You asked, as you popped up from around the corner, completely catching him off guard. It had been almost two weeks since you two had a proper conversation, and you weren't gonna let it go on any longer.

SODAPOP CURTIS

Okay so this is gonna come as a surprise to no one, but..

Throughout his life he has consistently gotten girlfriends and boyfriends with no issue

Again, no one's surprised

I mean, look at him, he's beautiful

Anyways-

He immediately knows that he likes you

And he very quickly starts planning out how he can go about the situation

It won't take very long for him to make his move, however if you beat him to it, he would definitely be over the moon

There you are, looking as good as ever. He's already decided that he's gonna ask you out later, an- wait.. your walking over to him..?

PONYBOY CURTIS

Poor kid doesn't know wtf is going on at first

All he knows is that he suddenly enjoys your company more then before

It wasn't until you interlocked his fingers with yours one night that he finally became fully aware of his feelings

He is not nearly as subtle about these feelings as he thinks he is.

He's so obvious, you'd have to be pretty inattentive to not notice anything

Based on this, you will likely be making the first move

With a dramatic sigh you let your head fall against his shoulder. The two of you have been studying together for about two hours and your in desperate need of a break. "C'mon, you need to focus." He said, sounding more annoyed then he really was. You grabbed his hand, interlocking your fingers and looking up at him pleadingly. "Pleease.?"

DALLAS WINSTON

Ohh boy

Out of allll the guys in Tulsa, you caught his attention?

Lucky 🙄

I love him sm istg

In all seriousness, this is very new to him

He's not used to genuinely caring about someone

Besides Johnny, he's never really loved anything

He's gonna start off with his typical flirting

That won't change until he realizes his feelings

After that, he switches to being a total jerk to you

Mans does not know how to process his feelings

Just give him time tho, he'll figure it all out

Here you are, sitting on the porch of the Curtis house. It's late and everyone is inside the house, save for you and Dal. He's been real difficult lately, although tonight his attitude has noticably improved. As you watch him struggle to light his cancer stick you can't help but wonder, what did he want to ask you.?

JOHNNY CADE

My sweet, respectful boy

He falls head over heels immediately

Everybody realizes his feelings rather quickly too

Including himself

He's not stupid

He notices how his cheeks get all warm

His hands get all sweaty

His knees feel like they might give out

It's a new feeling for him

For once he has someone touching him without causing him pain

I'm gonna fight his parents- WOAH! Who said that!? 😅

If your the type of person who is really affectionate with your friends (me fr) then you might actually kill the poor kid

He asked Dally for advice only to completely ignore it

Turns out Dally sucks at giving good advice, who woulda known?

He was thankful for how dark it had gotten, otherwise you would be able to see just how red his face had gone. For some reason you had decided it would be a great idea to hold his hand out of nowhere. Why can't you see what your doing to him?

TWO-BIT MATHEWS

You guys prolly met in middle school

He pulled some dumb shii and put gum in your hair or something

After that he often teased you

Referring to you as his girlfriend/boyfriend

You better expect a lot of playful flirting with this one

He pretty much confesses his feelings on the daily tbh

Albeit in a way that makes you think it's a joke

Eventually you just kinda realize that hey, maybe he isn't joking

"See, I always knew we were perfect for each other, ever since that day in sixth grade." He teased, throwing his arm around your shoulder only for you to immediately push it off. "Get off of me, would you?"

#the outsiders x reader #darry Curtis x reader #sodapop x reader #ponyboy x reader #Dallas Winston x reader #Johnny Cade x reader #Two-bit Mathews x reader #Spotify

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firesnap · 3 months

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Rambling about bad c!Crime takes in 2024.

I think the struggle with being a c!Crime fan during peak DSMP was having to deal with the people who would unironically use "vilbur" like it was a badge of honor and the ones who legitimately thought c!Tommy was 8-years-old at the beginning of L'Manberg.

Like, I don't need to rehash a lot of this. A hundred meta essays were about how Tommy was not responsible for Wilbur's mental health, that he was a front row audience member watching Wilbur's decline and begging people to intercede because he was a damn teenager with zero tools in his kit for "help my brother is frightening me and he's ten feet from me but I think I've lost him in this cave."

But you can still see people go "Ok Tommy helped make Wilbur worse."

No. Just no Tommy's worst behaviors didn't impact Wilbur because Wilbur was so far into his own spiral at that point that it just didn't even phase him if Tommy called him insane. You can't put that on Tommy. When Wilbur came back he even said he could recognize the man he was back then was frightening and beyond what Tommy should have had to see.

But, saying Wilbur acted on violent delusions on Tommy or emotionally abused him or isolated Tommy on purpose... Girl this isn't exile arc and you're not getting c!Crime.

Wilbur and Tommy at their best were moments were like... Tommy with a shield in front of Wilbur, Wilbur with a hand on Tommy's shoulder saying to be better than Wilbur ever was, Tommy and Wilbur running through a small nation and dancing on beaches and laughing at how fucking much the other one sucked with every bit of affection in the world tied behind those words. It was a loop of I'd die for you, I'd die for anything but especially you and Who the fuck ever asked you to die??

At their worst they were a negative feedback loop that fed each other. Tommy was possessive of Wilbur, from even the early L'Manberg days, to the point where Wilbur often neglected other relationships to give Tommy attention. He was angry at Wilbur for falling off the pedestal that Tommy put him on. Wilbur was just as dependent on Tommy being always behind him and took advantage of the fact that Tommy wouldn't leave. He dumped his own fears and paranoia and self-hatred at Tommy's feet and then assumed that this person younger than him could sort through it.

And if you can't handle hearing how they fed the worst parts of each other, then maybe you aren't really here for that dynamic. Maybe you've made something else up in your head that you like more. And that's fine, man. Do whatever the server is gone. Just don't act like your personal version is what canon gave us.

Also, something something it's totally fine to dislike Wilbur's finale btw, but as imperfect as the execution was, it was right on board with what they were telling us about c!Crime from right when Wilbur was revived to Wilbur telling Ranboo that, essentially, Tommy would never leave him and Wilbur knew that wasn't healthy. They needed to break the cycle to save themselves and whatever brotherhood was between them.

They were about acknowledging they were tied to each other in fucked up and unhealthy ways, but needing that sense of brother so much that they were both afraid to do anything about it.

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deans-queen · 2 months

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Bad at Love ❤️‍🩹

Prompt Idea: “At my worst, I worry you’ll realize you deserve better. At my best, I worry you won’t.”

Characters: Dean Winchester x Female Reader (Y/N) – mostly told in your (the readers’) P.O.V.

Summary: Dean and you have been close friends for a while since you started hunting with him and Sam. After a hunt, you and Dean get into a fight, then he gets vulnerable about his feelings towards you.

Inspired by the song: Bad at Love by Halsey

Warnings: SMUT, p in v (wrap it up kids), mature and sexual language. *18+ Readers ONLY please!* ( my best friend helped me with the smut parts )

Reader’s P.O.V.

“I really don’t need this from you Dean!” I shouted while storming into the bunker.

I walked quickly towards the room that Dean, and I were sharing.

Sam followed behind us, he was clearly irritated. “Will you guys stop already! This has been going on for an hour now.”

“Shut up, Sammy.” Dean said sternly. “And don’t you walk away from me damn it!” He roared while pointing at me. I got into the room and slammed my stuff down on the floor. Dean followed me into the room and shut the door.

“You’re being ridiculous! I can totally handle myself on hunts!”

“Yeah, cause trying to seduce a Werewolf and then getting kidnapped is handling yourself.” He said sarcastically.

I turned around and put my hands on my hips. “I thought it would work.”

He rolled his eyes.

He’s so damn stubborn, I can’t stand it.

“That’s not the point Y/N, you could have gotten yourself killed.”

“Well, we took care of that werewolf and still saved that little girl.” I sat on the edge of the bed and folded my arms.

I scoffed and muttered to myself, “I didn’t have this trouble when I was working alone.”

Dean turned back and looked at me with a shock to his face. “If that’s the way you feel sweetheart, then the door is right there.” He pointed at it and we both stayed silent for a minute.

I glared at him, got up and began to walk away. Tears were filling up my eyes, I guess my instincts were right about me and Dean. We didn’t belong together. Even though I have been crushing on him for a few months now it was obvious he didn’t have any feelings for me.

“Wait…” He said softly.

“What?!” I said harshly, turning around to face him.

“Look- I’m sorry, okay? I don’t know what came over me.”

“Why are you acting like this Dean? I mean…ever since that guy flirted with me last week you’ve been acting differently. I thought we were friends.”

“That’s the thing Y/N, I don’t want to be just friends with you…”

“What the hell does that mean?”

“Listen to me, please.” He said softly while taking my hands. His beautiful emerald, green eyes went from anger to soft and sincere.

“The reason I’ve been acting like this is because over the past few months I’ve developed strong feelings for you. I tried to hide them as much as I could but I…I can’t get you out of my head. The way you walk, the way you talk…. the way your hair lightens in the sun, the way your eyes light up when you laugh. It’s all so damn sexy to me.”

I was too stunned to speak, after all this time he felt the exact same way about me. I smiled at him and touched his face. I stroked his cheek and his stubble tickled my fingers.

“I feel the exact same way about you Dean, I have ever since I met you.”

He smiled back at me while saying this, “And the reason why I got so upset with you about the hunt is because I don’t wanna lose you. I always make the same mistakes cause, I’m bad at love. I’m bad at expressing my feelings. It’s something I’ve struggled with since I was a kid ... I pushed you away because at my worst, I worry you’ll realize you deserve better and walk away like all the others have.”

I'm bad at love

But you can't blame me for tryin'

You know I'd be lyin' sayin'

You were the one

That could finally fix me

Lookin' at my history

I'm bad at love

“That’s not true Dean, I’m always going to stand by you. You can’t get rid of me that easily.” I nudged him while winking.

He touched my face and leaned towards me allowing our lips to collide. The kiss was soft at first, growing more passionate. His lips were so soft and plump. I pulled back looking at his face and kissed him passionately again, he started rubbing on my body and within seconds our clothes were off. He began to lay me down and he started kissing my neck down to my boobs, while grabbing them with his strong hands. His lips moved down to my belly button and shortly after his mouth reached my pussy. I gasped. Dean asked, “Do you want me to keep going?” I said “Yes please,” I said softly, while I shoved his head back down.

As he went on my pussy was dripping wet and I was getting more antsy to make love with him. I told him to stop and lay down. “Now it’s my turn babe.” I said. He smirked and said “Okay.” He looked up and down at my body calling me beautiful. “Your body is so perfect baby, and it’s all mine.” He growled. We switched positions and I began to climb on top of him, teasing him while rubbing his dick on my pussy. He said “Don’t tease me baby, I want you inside me” I laughed while slowly putting it in and we both moaned instantly. “Oh fuck!”, we both said while grabbing onto each other. I started bouncing up and down super fast. Dean told me to stop. He didn't want to cum yet, but I told him I wanted him to. I was so close to cumming and I didn’t wanna stop now. I began going back and forth hopping on his dick and I begged Dean to cum inside me. He smiled looking at me and said “Okay, baby.”

On the last bounce Dean and I came together while moaning in each other’s mouth and grabbing each other's skin. We sat there for a moment and Dean looked up at me and said softly “You’re so perfect”, while passionately kissing me again.

“I guess this means we are together now.” Dean said.

And I giggled, nodding in approval. I was so happy that he was finally mine.

Then we stayed in bed, cuddling and enjoying each other's company. All while eating cheese burgers …. and of course pie!

Authors Note:

Hope you enjoyed this story!

Feel free to let me know what you think!

Like & follow for more !! Xoxo

Check out my other stories!

Masterlist📝

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bluebeary-jay · 1 year

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Reason

(Joel Miller x Reader)

Summary: things go wrong when you try to cross a small city. joel almost gets himself killed and you finally confront him about why he never seems to trust you with anything

Tags: angst and fluff, probably a little ooc, a bit of humor, love confession

Warnings: mentions of violence and wounds (but nothing very graphic), age gap, swearing

Word count: 3.8K

A/N: this is my first fic ever published so i'm kinda nervous but i couldn't stop thinking about this guy. english is not my first language so excuse any mistakes. hope you enjoy <3

Joel was acting like nothing was wrong.

Which wasn't exactly anything new, really. Ever since you knew the man, he always had this rough exterior, that ‘do not fuck with me’ aura around him, and was never, ever, one for showing emotions.

Back in the QZ, when he and Tess sometimes let you hang along with them to get a job done or sneak into the restricted territory, you saw how he burst, pent-up and concealed emotions spilling out of him at long last when something went horribly wrong. He had never aimed his yells at you, though, even when it was clearly your fault that someone noticed you or you fucked up your part of the job.

Just like today. You weren't exactly to blame this time – something heavy fell over around the corner of the building you were sneaking by, and the thug looking for you three spotted you as you were ducking behind a car. Shit like that often happened when you had to work in the ruins of the old world.

Then you got separated from Ellie and Joel when the gang shot at you. All of you saw before that the street was blocked and you were practically surrounded. You barked at the pair to get out of here and that you’ll join them later, and ran in the direction of the ravaged stores, hoping to find a way around the blockade.

You remembered bullets firing at you and missing your head by centimeters. You remembered shooting and killing some of the guys chasing you, then screaming when you bumped into one of them and they grabbed you. The kicks to your stomach, the struggle, some nasty comments made by the thugs before you managed to stab one of them through the cheek. You remembered faces contorted in fury and a man lifting a gun to your head.

In that brief moment, you were glad it was you who was about to die. Better you than–

The man who was about to shoot you dropped his pistol after a loud bang pierced the air and he fell to the ground, dead. Others were soon to follow, too slow in drawing their own guns. It was Joel, of course, all bloodied and livid, blasting a head after head of the guys who were trying to hurt you. You were pinned face down to the floor and couldn’t do anything but watch as he fought them with only his knife and bare hands, as the corridor he was in was too narrow to make use of the gun without it catching on a wall or his clothes. You struggled and tried to break free, unable to bear the sight of the men’s blood mixing with his own from the growing number of cuts on his skin.

The thug holding you down apparently decided to finish you off, but didn’t have a chance before Joel tackled him to the ground, receiving another long gash below his ribs. For one terrifying moment you were sure he was stabbed in the chest and your whole world stopped. But the grunts and curses coming from the spot where Joel was knocked down on the ground quickly told you that he was fine.

You saved Joel just in time, driving a sharp shard of metal into his attacker's neck. After that the older man quickly looked you over, asking if you were hurt, and when you told him no, he grabbed your arm and led you to where Ellie was waiting.

All of you managed to get out and it didn’t seem like the gang was following you anymore. Excluding a couple of cuts and scrapes you all were fine and alive, which had to be a goddamn miracle.

That didn’t mean you weren’t absolutely furious.

Joel knew it and you suspected that’s why he was so insistent about walking in total silence, sending you and Ellie angry glares every time either of you opened your mouth. You were shooting daggers at his back as he walked in the front and even Ellie had to sense the tense atmosphere, for she was unusually quiet.

You knew Joel Miller was a protector at heart. That, among other things, was what made you care for him more than anyone else in your life, more than you’d care for a companion or even a friend. His caring, gentle nature hidden from the world under the rough exterior was what ultimately made you fall for him.

But no matter how attractive and admirable you found him, it drove you up the fucking wall that he never listened to you, never let you do anything even slightly risky or dangerous, like he always expected you to mess up. He didn’t even want you to sneak outside the QZ with him and Tess, and it was the other woman who finally convinced him.

You hated the thought that he might see you as a daughter, or worse - a burden. But the age gap between you two seemed bigger and bigger every time he did something like that, going after you because he didn’t trust you to get the job done.

And you hated it.

Only when the place you’ll spend the night in was picked and Joel took off his backpack with a wince of pain, you marched over to him and shoved his chest in frustration. Even though he was tired and hurt, he still towered over you and was much heavier, which made taking your anger out on him extremely difficult.

“The hell you're doing?” he asked incredulously, looking almost surprised at the fury painting your face.

“Don’t you ever think about doing something like that again, Joel!” you yelled at him, knowing you’re too far for any unwanted ears to hear you screaming. “I fucking told you to take Ellie and run! Why the hell did you come back?!”

“You’d prefer me to leave you behind and let those bastards do whatever sick things they wanted to do? A ‘thank you’ would be nice.”

Okay, now you were seething. You clenched your jaw and pushed him again, feeling honestly so fed up with his bullshit.

“Why don’t you ever listen to me?! You almost fucking died, not to mention you put Ellie in danger, too!”

“Hey, I was safe!” Ellie chimed in, straightening from the place she was sitting in on her sleeping bag. “And there wasn’t actually–”

“Ellie,” Joel cut her short harshly, making it clear it’s not the time for her usual sarcasm. She rolled her eyes and muttered something about grumpy old men, turning their back to them.

You huffed and turned around, going deeper into the woods. Joel said your name but when you didn’t react he went after you with long strides, grabbing your arm and halting you.

“Will you tell me what’s going on?”

“You know damn well what’s going on!” You yanked your arm out of his grasp. “I told you to go and you didn’t listen, like always, and probably had to hack your way through the whole group of these idiots just to almost get yourself killed because of me!”

“Did you really expect me to leave you behind?” he asked with his voice raised.

“Yes! At that moment it wasn’t about me, I was thinking about Ellie and you! She’s way more important than I am! You’re more important!”

“Don’t you dare say somethin–”

“Do you think I’d be able to take Ellie across the country without getting any of us killed?!” You threw your hand to the side, huffing with anger. “I don’t have your skills and experience. You’re the only one able to handle it on your own, so if any of us is to die, it will be me, no questions asked.”

“Like hell it’ll be you!” He was seething now, too, and he came up to you in two long, angry strides, stopping just before he could stomp on your shoes. Suddenly you two were so close that you could feel his breath on your face. “I am not fucking letting you get yourself killed! Not now and not ever.”

“Can’t you just think logically for a second?!” you shouted in his face, tears of rage and helplessness gathering in your eyes. “I’m a goddamn burden to you both! Yes, it was me who alerted them of our presence and I understand that’s probably why you never trusted me…” Actually saying those words out loud was more painful than you anticipated and you had to take a deep breath to calm yourself down. “It’s just, I can’t fight like you can, I’m not as valuable as Ellie, I…”

You had to press your lips together not to sob accidentally. Although you knew you had to make your point across, you still didn’t want Joel to see how weak you actually are.

“But I’m not fucking useless, understand?” you said sternly, looking him dead in the eyes. “I am gonna help you both go as far as possible, but if we’re ever in that kind of situation again, you’re leaving me behind and I’m buying you and Ellie as much time as I can.”

His expression hardened and he started to shake his head, but you beat him to it.

“I know you never wanted me to go on any missions with you, but just once let me be useful, alright? Even if all I can do is buy you a couple of precious minutes.”

“By letting yourself die.”

He said it with such finality and disbelief, all your anger got swept off and replaced by weariness. You sighed heavily and leaned against a tree.

“Yes, Joel. I know you’d rather not lose anyone else, but if I have a chance to help those I care about…” You realized you said too much and shook your head. “I don’t understand why it is such a big deal for you.”

He opened his mouth, then closed it again. His warm brown eyes were on you and for the first time ever you wished he'd look away. You turned your head and sighed again.

God, you were so very tired.

“I’m going to look for some firewood. You go check if the place is safe, alright?”

“No, listen–”

“Just this once, Joel,” you cut him off, not turning around. The tears that have gathered in your eyes before were threatening to spill down your cheeks and you weren’t going to show him how much this situation has pained you. “Just this once, drop it. Please.”

This time he didn’t stop you when you wandered further away from the camp and you truthfully didn’t know if it was better or worse.

*****

The rest of the evening went by mostly in silence. Ellie tried to lighten up the mood by reading some bad jokes from her book and though Joel was his usual grumpy self, it actually helped you a little. The girl seemed pretty proud of herself about making you crack a smile, but her efforts to bring Joel into the conversation came to naught. The smile disappeared from your face every time your eyes met and he looked away.

He almost didn’t say a word throughout your meal and preparing for bed, only muttering something under his breath when Ellie told you both goodnight. You were so tired that you managed to fall asleep almost immediately despite the worry and sadness gnawing at you when your thoughts drifted to the man laying on the opposite side of the fire.

When you opened your eyes again, the dawn was only just breaking. The air was cold and crisp, and you groaned, shivering and pulling your coat tighter around yourself, only to realize something else was draped over your form.

You rubbed your eyes and noticed the familiar green jacket covering your torso. Its owner was a couple of feet away, sitting with his back to you on a big log. The rifle lay next to him, propped up against the fallen tree. Your shoulders slumped at the sight of him and you remembered your argument from last night. You almost laid back down, but ignoring his act of kindness felt wrong, so with a quiet sigh you stood up, making your way to where he was sitting.

Joel glanced to the side when you approached and his gaze was instantly drawn to his jacket you wrapped around yourself.

“You were shivering,” he muttered, apparently knowing what you were about to ask. He said it as if giving you his jacket was the most sensible thing to do in a situation like that.

Was that an attempt to say he’s sorry for how he reacted earlier? You decided not to question his intentions too much and instead sat down next to him, nailing your eyes on the patch of recently disturbed ground.

“Thanks,” you replied under your breath, still not looking at the man. “But you didn’t have to. You’re probably cold now.”

“M’not.”

Liar. Stubborn as always.

None of you said anything else for a long time. You contemplated whether you should just go back to your sleeping bag and leave his jacket on the log, or stay and try to defuse the tension between you two. Somehow neither of these options appealed to you but it was so difficult to just sit here in silence and–

“I’ve been thinkin' about what you said,” Joel spoke up suddenly and very quietly, which interrupted your dwelling. “And I couldn’t stop remembering how damn sure you sounded when you said I don’t trust you.”

A wave of uneasiness washed over you and you wrapped his jacket tighter around yourself. “It’s okay that you don’t,” you said slowly, not really sure what he was getting at. “I mean, I’m not sure if even I would trust my–”

“That’s the thing,” he interrupted you with an irritated sigh and turned his head to look at you with his brows furrowed. “I do trust you. I just have no clue how…” Another sigh. “How I could’ve fucked up so badly that you’d think that.”

You blinked several times, not sure if you weren’t still dreaming after all. It kind of felt like a dream when he was sitting so close to you, his jacket around your shoulders and a rising sun painting his hair in a golden light.

“But you never let me do anything important or dangerous on my own,” you contradicted quietly, which caused Joel to drop his head loosely and close his eyes. “You’re always against taking me with you anywhere, and–”

“That’s because you’re important to me!” he cut you off, evidently louder than he intended, because he immediately glanced at you and rubbed the bridge of his nose. “Sorry,” he muttered. “It’s just hard for me to understand how… how did…”

Joel seemed at a loss for words and you longed to touch him, to take the burden of carrying the conversation from his shoulders and ease the weariness on his face, but you weren't really sure what he intended to say. You didn’t want to get your hopes up, but it almost sounded like…

“I can’t bear the thought of losing you,” he said softly at last and you could pinpoint the exact moment you stopped breathing. Joel’s eyes were closed and he was propping his forehead on his hand, and he looked so… sad. “That’s why I never wanted you to take any risk, because if something happened to you and I weren’t there to protect you…”

He swallowed heavily, inhaled, then straightened up and looked over at you. The look he gave you was so tender and open, it was almost difficult to focus on his words.

“I care about you, too,” he whispered, and you remembered what slipped out of your mouth when you were arguing earlier. “A lot. Much more than I should, but I can’t… I can’t help it.” He turned to look forward, his eyes narrowing from the sunlight creeping from between the trees, and he looked so beautiful in that moment, you wished you had a camera on hand.

“Joel,” you breathed, but he shook his head.

“I didn’t want to make shit weird between… us.” He waved his hand in a vague gesture. “So don’t feel pressured into sayin’ anything. Just don’t expect me to idly stand by while you’re risking your life because–”

“Joel,” you repeated, louder this time, which finally made him shut up.

“What?”

You didn’t really know what you were going to say. You just wanted him to stop talking because he was only torturing himself with this ramble and you couldn’t bear it.

Very slowly, and very gently, you took Joel’s hand in your own and moved it over to your lap. Ignoring his eyes on you, you traced the length of his calloused fingers and brushed the center of the palm where a cut from a couple of days ago was still healing. Your heart was beating so damn loud in your ears, you wouldn’t hear if a parade of clickers just walked past you both, but with all your might you tried to keep your breathing steady and your face from going beet red.

He said you were important to him. That he couldn’t bear the thought of losing you. He didn’t see you as a burden as you feared, so maybe… maybe he didn’t view you as a kid, as well.

Throwing all caution to the wind, you laced your fingers together and brought them to your lips, leaving a small kiss on his bloodied knuckles. Joel tensed in a split second and you weren't sure if he was still breathing, but you didn’t look at him in fear that his expression may take away the remnants of your temporary courage.

“If I misread you, this is gonna be painfully awkward,” you mumbled in a feeble attempt to defuse the tension in the air, so thick it was almost choking you. “But I’m still grateful you told me all thi–”

His other hand – the same hand he was ready to kill and protect with, with which he was ready to tear his way through the mass of enemies just to save you – lifted itself to your face and cupped your cheek. Joel was looking at you with wonder, the fingers you cradled in your own twitching slightly as if he was holding back from tightening his hold. His eyes seemed like they were made out of liquid gold in the light of the morning sun and he looked at you with such adoration that you once again humored the thought that it was just all some cruel, vivid dream.

But no, it couldn’t have been. Not when Joel’s skin was so cold against your burning face and not when his eyes flickered to your lips…

It was you who leaned in first, but once your lips touched, Joel took the reins, untangling his fingers from yours to wrap his arm around your waist and pull you closer.

You expected him to be rough and confident, just like he was during a fight, to take what he wanted and devour you – at least that’s how you always imagined kissing him would be like. What you didn’t expect, however, was a trembling sigh that escaped him when you two parted for a moment to take a breath and a gentle touch of his fingertips along your jaw. His hold on your body was by turns firmer and more loose, like he was afraid he’d scare you off if he let himself use too much strength.

You, on the other hand, had no reservations in taking his face in your hands firmly and parting your lips, encouraging him to go on. It seemed to work at first, because Joel pulled you in even closer, letting you crawl onto his lap, but then he stopped abruptly and moved you gently away, still keeping his hands on both sides of your face.

“Darlin’, I need to know if you’re sure about this, because I won’t be able to…”

You pressed your lips to his again, this time much slower and more delicate, in an attempt to silence him. Joel finally relaxed when you cupped his face and planted a kiss on his brow, always so furrowed in concern and worry.

“Joel, I wanted you to kiss me for the whole time I knew you. I really, really care about your bullheaded skull.” You looked down at him with a playful smile, to which he chuckled. “Though you’re shit at sending signals. I was sure you hated me.”

“Well, you are hard to deal with sometimes,” he mused in a teasing tone and you jabbed him in the stomach before he managed to grab your wrist. “But I… I'm sorry that I made you feel this way. Like you didn’t matter to me.”

You furrowed your brows at the uncharacteristic vulnerability and sadness in his voice and your worry must’ve etched itself in your eyes because when Joel looked at you, he turned away and closed his eyes immediately.

“Listen, you know now you matter to me more than anyone else in this cursed world. I don’t want to ever be as worried sick about you like I was yesterday,” he whispered. You brushed some hair off his face and the creases on his forehead softened a little. “And I don’t ever want you to think you’re not important. You’re… fuck, you’re the goddamn reason I’m doing all this. You're my reason, you hear me?”

You just nodded with a wide smile that threatened to split your face in half.

“I understand,” you answered, just as quietly. “You’re also the reason I’m doing all of this for.”

This time it was unclear who initiated the kiss. Nevertheless, you ended up held tightly in his arms, marveling at his touch on your skin and the feeling of his chapped lips on yours, and there wasn’t any other place you wished to be in.

It lasted just a couple of seconds though, because you were interrupted by the sound of fake barfing and gurgles of disgust coming from the direction of your camp.

“Gross!” yelled Ellie loudly, but she had a shit-eating grin on her face when she squinted at Joel holding you in his lap. “Don’t suck faces when there are children present!”

“Shut up!” Joel yelled back, but without any bite in his tone. A soft smile played on his lips when he looked back at you. “She’ll be insufferable now,” he murmured and you snorted at how done he sounded. He mirrored your expression and held your hand to his face to kiss your fingers tenderly, which made Ellie gag even louder.

“If you start making out in front of me, I won’t hesitate to throw a fucking sandwich at you!”

“She won’t,” muttered Joel, not even turning to the teen before he leaned in and kissed you slowly again.

You smiled into the kiss, barely noticing stale pieces of bread flying over Joel’s shoulder.

#joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #the last of us #tlou hbo #joel tlou #joel miller #featuring our badass queen #ellie williams #the last of us fic #joel miller x y/n #the last of us fanfiction #pedro pascal #pedro pascal x reader #beary writes

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axelsagewrites · 3 months

Text

James Potter*Misunderstandings

Pairing: James Potter x f!reader

Word count: 1661

Can be read as a part two to heroic deed here

Warnings: none

Masterlist here

Being shy and friends with James Potter was already a struggle since he was anything but however you had a new issue now; you’d fallen heads over heels for him. you didn’t need a man to save you but ever since James defended you from those bullies it was hard not to like him.

Before when you walked through corridors you would get constantly shoulder checked and shoved but James had no issues shoving back and soon you found yourself being able to walk the halls without almost getting tackled.

James had also introduced you to the marauders who thankfully weren’t as intimidating as you first thought. Maybe it was because of how tall Remus was or the ladies’ man reputation Sirius had but you didn’t expect to be in a heated debate over breakfast over which magical creature would be the best at quidditch.

“You cannot be serious mate! How would a phoenix even hold a snitch?”

“Oh yeah cause a hippogriff has great dexterity!”

Remus and Sirius continued to bicker as you silently ate your breakfast. Remus was across from you next to Peter while James was sat next to you, Sirius next to him. Peter had ‘borrowed’ Remus’s homework while he was distracted, though you weren’t convincing Sirius didn’t start this conversation as a decoy, while James just laughed at his two idiot friends.

“You, okay?” he whispered, snapping you from your daze.

Shit you’d been caught staring, quickly say something, you mentally cursed yourself, “Yeah um just not a morning problem,”

“Alright sunshine I’ll leave you to daydream,” James laughed, your skin heating up at his words while he tried to buy into the argument.

You and Remus both shared your first class of the day so after the squabbling stopped you both set off to the third floor. “You ever gonna tell him you like him?” Remus asked as if he was asking for the time.

“What? Like who?” you stuttered but Remus just gave you a knowing look, “How did you know?” you sighed.

Remus snorted, a grin playing his lips, “Cmon seriously? yous hang out all the time. you should just ask him out,” he shrugged and your eyes basically bulged out your skull.

“I cant do that. He doesn’t like me like that-“

“Has he ever told you that?” he said making you stop in your tracks.

Remus eventually paused, staring at the confused look on your face, “Do you know something I don’t know?”

Remus sighed, “I know the last girl James asked out embarrassed him in front of the whole common room, which to be fair was his fault for asking so loudly,” Remus said, cringing at the memory of James proclaiming his love for lily in front of everyone and getting told a very quick no. hell even you had heard of the story, “and now he doesn’t talk about that shit anymore but if you ask me I think he does. He never shuts up about you,” Remus said, half rolling his eyes, “No offence,”

“None taken,”

All you could really think about all day was what Remus had said. James even had to ask if you were okay over dinner because how ‘zoned out’ you had been. “I need to return some books to the library,” you said, deciding to end your misery but James didn’t get the memo.

“I’ll come with. See ya,” he said, nodding to the guys and instantly getting up to follow you.

You tried your best to make small talk, but you could feel your palms getting sweatier with each word. After leaving the library you decided to finally do something about it, “Hey you busy this Saturday?” you asked, trying your best not to stutter.

“Eh I don’t think so. No detentions yet at least,” he joked, “how come?”

“Was just wondering if you’d wanna go to Hogsmeade with me?” you said, your cheeks instantly heating up like crazy.

The smile of James face though made your own heart skip, “Yeah sure. I’ll say to the guys yeah?” and just like that it sunk instantly.

“Oh yeah sure totally,”

To say your confidence had been knocked was an understatement and the whole walk down to Hogsmeade you were hanging at the back of the group trying not to show how much you were internally sulking. Yous went to honey dukes first, picking up a few bits and bobs all while Remus was giving you a sympathetic smile and James was none the wiser.

“He’s just clueless you know,” Remus whispered to you at the shelves while James went up to the till, “He probably didn’t even realise you were asking him out,”

“Or maybe he just didn’t wanna hurt my feelings,” you mumbled, instantly shutting up when James walked back. “Watcha get?”

“Chocolate frogs, of course. got you one too here,” he said passing you the frogs while Remus gave you a ‘see? told you so’ look.

Soon you all ended up piling into a booth at the three broom sticks. Remus and Peter were on one side while you, James, and Sirius squeezed into the other. Luckily you got to be on the side not against the wall however because of the tight squeeze you were pressed right into James side. There was nothing you could’ve done though, there wasn’t an empty seat in the place.

“You’d think for a magical pub they could make more seats,” Sirius scoffed as he crammed himself against the wall. “Its your turn for first round Peter,” he said.

Peter rolled his eyes, “Do you keep tabs or something?”

“Yes,” Sirius said, and it honestly wouldn’t shock you if he had it all written down in a notebook. “I’ll take a butterbeer,”

When Peter asked you what you wanted you offered to go with him to help him carry it but also as an excuse to get away from James. Peter however was glad to accept the help.

Meanwhile Remus was slapping James across the head as you walked out of sight. “You dumbass,”

“What?!” James squeaked, rubbing his head, “and ow! By the way,”

“This was supposed to be a date,” Remus half hissed making Sirius look between the two.

“Since when did you do go out?”

“We don’t,” James rolled his eyes, “what are you on about? She invited us all to come here?”

Even Sirius dropped his head into his hand at this point, “Think about what she said,” Remus sighed, “Did she say ‘you guys’ or ‘you’?”

James head tilted as he thought before a small ‘oh’ came from his lips followed by a very annoyed, “fuck!” while Remus and Sirius groaned at their friends obliviousness, “What do I do now? Should yous leave or-“

“No that just makes it weird,”

“Then what do I do?!”

“Shut up since she’s walking back here,” Sirius said, jabbing his elbow into his ribs, “Hey guys!” he said, way louder and happier than normal making both you and Peter share a concerned look.

James spent the rest of the afternoon beating himself up. He’d liked you from the first day he met you, hating that he hadn’t met you sooner and now he’d gone and fucked it up. He was distracted the rest of the day and while the group was walking back to the grounds he found himself hanging back a bit.

You noticed and decided to drop back as well, “Hey you okay?” you asked, genuine concern on your face making James’s heart melt.

“Can I ask you something?” he said giving you an odd sense of De Ja Vu, “See the other day did you mean that you wanted us all to go or like just us?” he said, voice trailing off when you looked away.

What he hadn’t expected was to see your eyes watering when you looked back, “Don’t worry about it, it was dumb and-“you began to ramble but James stopped in his tracks, grabbing your wrist making you turn to face him. “I’m sorry,”

“No, I am,” James said, stepping closer, “I was an asshole I didn’t know,” he sighed, looking at the ground, “Why didn’t you tell me you wanted it to be just us?”

You shuffled on your feet, trying desperately not to look in his eyes, “Just didn’t want you to laugh at me or something,”

James felt his heart shatter, “I wouldn’t have laughed,” he said making you finally look up from the ground, “I’m sorry,”

“It’s okay,”

“It’s not,” James sighed, staring off in the distance making you squirm in anticipation, “You busy tomorrow?”

“Um I don’t think so- “

“Great! Good great um quidditch practise ends at 2,” James said as he began to ramble, “So I’ll come get you at half 2 and we can go back to Hogsmeade tomorrow. Just us yeah?” he said, finally looking back at you with a hopeful smile.

“Like a date?” you asked, your own lips tugging into a small smile.

James grinned at your reaction, “Yeah like a real date. Without those losers,” he said making you laugh, “I wanna do it right okay?”

“Okay,” you said, “It’s a date,”

“Great,” James said, breaking out into a cheesy smile when suddenly you both heard whooping and wolf whistles behind you, “Oh fuck off,” James groaned as you began to laugh.

Sirius all but ran over, flinging his arm around James’s shoulder, “Fucking finally mate told you to just ask her,”

“You don’t get the credit for this!” Remus butted in, totally offended by Sirius’s comment, “I made this happen!”

“Nu uh,”

“Yu uh,”

As the two began to bicker you suddenly felt James take your hand. You looked at him, eyes wide but he just gave you a small smile as he tugged on your hand, leading you away from his nutcase friends. “Walk me back to my dorm?” you asked.

James grinned down at you, “Always,”

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deluluriddhi · 2 months

Text

𐙚 ❛ Authors In Love ❜ Society

(🪞 LIB?) 𐙚 synopsis: two childhood best friends

who are separated and can't reach eachother, becoming authors just to write about each other.

𐙚 pairing: author!Sunghoon x author!yn

𐙚 contains: Jake as Sunghoon's kpop idol friend, a little bit enemies to lovers, fluff, plotties plot, mentions of a big misunderstanding, heart warming, a little bit of agnst at the beginning, mentions of struggles of authors, total sfw content. (Lmk if I forgot anything)

𐙚 wc: ?????

𐙚 note: inspired from a reel I saw nearly a year ago but couldn't forget. I apologise for any mistakes becuz Tumblr didn't save my first draft. And yes, that reel's link I can't find anywhere but I always wanted to write an FF based on it. Thanks god I had the ss. Feedbacks, likes, reblogs and follows are appreciated! TAGLIST OPEN. ADD A COMMENT TO BE TAGGED IN THIS ONE OR/AND THE NEXT ONE. PART 2 , PART 3

𐙚 Riddhi speaks: so, you all got to know at last why I was so inactive these days? It was bcuz I was writing this. Glasses Sunghoon got a chokehold on me. The struggles of authors mentioned are half based on my struggles having this blog lol. Literary all the books I read are New York Bestselling. Ik this is really long ㅠㅠ good luck reaching the end! Please show love to this, I poured my all into this. ENJOYYY!!

𐙚 playlist: Lovers Rock by tv girl. Bound to fall in love　

24TH MARCH, 2018

AT THE AIRPORT

"Hoon dear, bid your good byes.", Sunghoon's dad said. "No dad! I don't wanna leave Y/N.", little Hoon said as he clung to your body with your arms wrapped around him.

"Aeroplane number 256, From Washington DC to Seoul will be arriving shortly at Terminal Number 4. Please hurry and get in a line to aboard the plane. Thank you.", a voice from the speakers said.

"Hoon dear, we have to leave., Sunghoon's mother said, pulling him apart from you. "No mama! I don't wanna go. I wanna stay with Y/N., Salty teardrops fell from his eyes as he tried to escape from his mother's tight grasps.

Your eyes flooded with tears as you saw him crying and going away. Small y/n only knew it was somewhere far and she is not gonna able to see him anymore; a far away fairyland, they said. Poor Y/N.

(24 years later)

24TH MARCH, 2042

Y/N'S BEDROOM, WASHINGTON DC

24 years.

It has been 24 whole years since Sunghoon had gone to Korea. 24 years without any contact with your childhood bestfriend. Both of your mothers were best friends before you two were born. They decided to live next to eachother, so that they could hang cut everyday. Then, they had you two. Sunghoon was a few months older than you. You two used to play all day when at your house when you two were little. Stick to eachother, go to school together, eat together, play together, you two were inseparable. That's how you two became best friends. You two were in love with each other, just too small for you two to understand but everyone around knew. But, unfortunately, Sunghoon and his family had to move when he was five years old. You were five years old too, wondering why he had to go. That really was a heartbreaking moment for both of you. None of you two could move on; face and name plastered in both of you two's heart. Every year, on this exact same day you wait for him to come back, putting a cross on that date if he doesn't but he never does.

You slumped down on the bed after crossing off yet another 24th March on the calander on the wall. He is gonna come back, you said to yourself, but you are unsure yourself. You glance at your unfinished book opened in Google Docs on your Laptop, it's deadline mally close. Well, being one of the most famous New York Bestsellers and Penguins' most liked author was hard. Well, what can we do? Looks like the audiance really books about your lost true childhood love. Yes, all the books you have ever written were all about Sunghoon, well, the audiance don't know that. How much you miss him, how much you love him, all the things you want to tell him, etc., was all you write in your books. Your pen name is Lee Nari.

But you had a competitor. Park Eun. Another author. He is best writer next to you, clase behind. It was always a competition between you and him, in everything, starting from Best Author of the Year award to Most Books sold award. Tho you two never met one another you have a kind of rage against him nor you have ever read his books or saw his photos. Because you never got the time to. "Argh, I hate this.", with that you started writing again.

(SAME DAY)

SUNGHOON'S ROOM, SEOUL, SOUTH KOREA

"Bad", he said as he deleted the one line he wrote. "BAD', he said again after a few minutes, tapping the backspace button aggressively. After a few more minutes, "BADDD", he shouted while kicking the leg of the table really hard which resulted in his own pain in return.

"Arag, I hate this", he slowly murmured under his deep breath, trying to calm himself down. He rubbed his feet before getting up from his chair and running outside in his lawn. Fresh air after hours of sitting like a shrimp in a chair, constantly typing down words on his laptop.

Park Sunghoon, or popularly known as Park Eun by pen name, is a 29 years old New York Bestselling author in Seoul, Korea.

Just as he was enjoying the nature a familiar voice from behind him came. "Hello Mister!". to no surprise it was his best friend, the first person to be friends with him after he came to Korea, Jake Sim. A soft slime tugged across Sunghoon's face as he turned around to look at Jake's face. "An off day from ENHYPEN?", Sunghoon asked him while walking closer to hug him. "Yeah.", Jake's voice laced with tiredness of being an idol, he said after burying his face in Sunghoon's shoulders and sinking in the warmth of his body. "Oh oh!", Jake excitedly said while breaking the hug, his face looking exactly like an excited golden retriever, "Look at this! Look at this!". Jake pulled out his phone from his pocket. "Aw man, Calm down', Sunghoon muttered under his breath, closing his eyes, as he saw the golden boy recklessly trying to find something on his phone. "There! I found it!", Jake exclaimed with his phone just infront of Sunghoon's face.

What shown on the screen was a teaser for Lee Nari's new book coming out shortly. Sunghoon was in rage. After all, Lee Nari, a person he doesn't know anything about, is trying to steal his position in the Author's World. She is his dearest competitor and sworn enemy, Yet, Sunghoon has never read her books or saw her pictures. They are the one that divides Bookstagram and BookTok into two. Sunghoon is still trying to beat her but she is quite a mile ahead of him. "yeah yeah, okay", Sunghoon told Jake, not wanting to talk about Lee Nari anymore. "So, how is Betrayed Love going?", Jake asked, sensing the atmosphere, "you are still writing about her, aren't you?". "yeah", Sunghoon quietly said, "I should go USA to meet her but I am so caught up with work here and I don't even know of she is still there.". Jake's succesful attempt to cheer up Sunghoon, "Hey hey! Show me the work!"

"till the end of the Earth, I will find you one day. Is that what you want?", Jake asked after examining Sunghoon's unfinished book on his Laptop. Sunghoon nodded as an yes, "but I tried my best to find her. She might be dead too, he said hugging himself and head hung down low. "Aw Hoonie! Don't say that! You will find her.", Jake said after engulfing Sunghoon in a warm hug, trying his best to comfort him. "It's you birthday soon. I will buy you a book from Lee Nari.." Jake suddenly said, smiling cheekily, "Well, it won't be a waste maybe.", Sunghoon said.

(A FEW DAYS LATER)

3RD APRIL, 2042

Y/N'S HOUSE

Ding Dong.

Y/N's house doorbell rang. "Oh God, who is here so early morning?", you complained but dragged your feets to open the door.

You were greeted by the Mailman with a package which seemed to be for you. He quickly handed you the parcel and took his leave. You stared at the packet in your hands.

It was sent by one of your long distance friends saying that you might like what was Inside. Curious, you closed the door and sat on the sofa to unwrap the packet rather vigorously just you know what was inside. You your utter disappointment, it was a book by Park Eun. You were about to throw it away but it was the book description written on the back which made you curious. Broken Hearts? Impressive. You skipped to the first chapter of the book and started reading. And the next moment you knew, you were so deep into the book that the whole world outside was mute to you.

It was a story. A story about how a girl saved him from a falling off a hill when he was little and from then, he fell in love with her deeply but never saw that unknown girl anymore. After a few years he saw her in a dream. She had dark long black hair, doe eyes and kissable lips. But whenever he was to get near her it seemed like she was getting further away and he could never reach her.

"Wait, dark long black hair, doe eyes and kissable lips? But that's my description....." you realised, staring at that sentence. Soft fingers skipped over to the last page where an Email ID was given for any kind of issue with the book. Well you SURELY have an issue now. Or else, why would your sworn enemy write about your description in his book... Or was it coincidence?

"[email protected]...." You said as you typed the address in the address bar.

❛❛ Why did you mention my description in your book?

[pic of that sentence attached]

Why are you messing with me when you already know who is gonna take New York Bestsellers trophy home this year? Just so you know i am not gonna let you take this one home.

Lots of hate,

Nari ❜❜

Was what was written in the email you sent.

You were eating lunch when a notification came to your phone. Rather unwillingly you took a glance at the screen. Expecting it to be yet another reminder from the bookseller that your deadline is near but to your surprise it was a reply from Lee Eun's Email!! You never expected him to reply within one day. You choked on your food and gulped a whole bottle of water down. Quickly clicking on the notification to that replied email.

❛❛ Hi! Please text on this number for your queries: +82 20121112xxx. ❜❜

Confused but curious, you added that number to your WhatsApp and copy pasted the whole email.

(SAME DAY)

SUNGHOON'S ROOM, SEOUL, KOREA

"Hoon, how much more time are you gonna take?"

"just 5 more minutes"

Jake signed as he flopped down on the bed, tired of waiting for his friend to be back from shower. His eyes fell on Sunghoon's unlocked phone laying close to him. What made him more curious was the email notification from a rather known email showed on the lockscreen. Double tapping on the notification led him straight to that email. An Email from Sunghoon's sworn enemy. He decided to have some fun while sunghoon is gone. He thought, why not a little bit of Enemies to Lovers trope?

He attached Sunghoon's personal phone number with that mail...

He deleted that mail after it was sent, cleared it's whole existence.

"Jakey? What are you doing on my phone?", Sunghoon said after coming out of the bathroom, shocking Jake. "Ah-um-nothing-just ringing up my phone cuz it was lost haha", Jake said in a nervous tone and then ran to the bathroom.

Later that evening when Jake had gone back to his dorm, Sunghoon was chilling on the couch watching a movie with pop corn bits spread all around him, messy eater. A text from an unknown number alighted his phone screen, diverting his attention to it. But he was really confused.

Sunghoon's eyeballs were about to roll out of their socket. No way his worst enemy was texting him. He cursed Jake under his breath.

In anger, he threw away his phone across the couch, it's screen cracked. He is furious on Jake and your sarcasm, even tho, a weird thought crossed his mind that made him doubt himself.

What if Lee Nari is Y/n?

No, no, it cannot be

This thought the number of times crossed his mind made him breathless, pulling his hair and screaming. Lee Nari, his worst enemy can't be his lost childhood crush.

He couldn't sleep properly at night after those texts with Nari.

×××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××

Send an ask for part 2. I promise this will be really exciting and my best fic ever.

#deluluriddhi #enhypen #kpop smut #kpop hard hours #kpop hard thoughts #enhypen smut #enha smut #sunghoon hard hours #enhypen sunghoon smut #enhypen sunghoon #enhypen sunghoon hard hours #enhypen sunghoon hard hours sunghoon sunghoon hard hours sunghoon hard thoughts enhypen sunghoon #enhypen scenarios #enhypen fluff #enhypen sunghoon fluff #sunghoon fluff #sunghoon x reader #enhypen fanfiction #riddhi writes✏️

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smoft-demons · 3 months

Note

If you aren't busy could you try writing about an mc that looks identical to Lilith and maybe even has a similar name example: lily, Lillian etc. (If you can, maybe mc that has a similar personality with lilith) And Ofc its platonic. (sorry if you don't understand, I barely ask on tumblr(⁠´⁠-⁠﹏⁠-⁠`⁠；⁠)

Also! It can be fluff or angst (if you can't write all of the brothers lucifer, belphegor and Beelzebub would be fine(⁠◍⁠•⁠ᴗ⁠•⁠◍⁠)

Mc can be gender neutral! (You can choose whatever format you're comfortable with)

Ofc if u don't want to its fine, i just saw your requests open

Sorry if this is too long(⁠╥⁠﹏⁠╥⁠)

Sure! No worries about it being too long, it gives me lots to work with :)

First request yay! Hope you like it

MC’s name is Lily

Lucifer:

Lucifer double-takes when he first sees you. He knew your name in advance, but looking at you, seeing the resemblance… it shocks him.

He keeps a straight face, however.

It becomes increasingly obvious that he has a soft spot for you. It grows softer and softer as he gets to know you.

When you harmlessly disobey him, he can’t help but let you off. Lilith was a bit of a rebel too, and you look just like her when you’re trying to be sneaky

He loses it when you put yourself in danger! You remind him so much of his baby sister, who he gave everything he could for… and he’s supposed to keep this blasted human alive, so help him he will succeed! It’s a matter of pride—and also trauma.

All that is there, but still Lucifer makes an effort to pay attention to the differences between Lilith and you. Few as there may be, he will not cloud his own judgement by thinking of you as the new her.

And he will not do you the disservice of acting like you’re someone you’re not.

When the ancestry reveal happens, he’s not exactly surprised. It’s still great news, but… not shocking!

He’s already had his crisis about not being unfair to you by acting like you’re a replacement, so he’s actually pretty good about not saying anything hurtful along those lines.

Beelzebub:

He can’t bear to look at you at first

I mean really, how he’s grieving his sister plus how he’s missing his twin… what’s he supposed to do? You’re in Belphie’s spot, and you’re called Lily, and you’re even acting like her… his heart aches

Good news tho, he definitely won’t eat you

He feels AWFUL for scaring you that one time, about the custard

And that conversation when he opens up to you about that impossible choice he had to make about who to save? He won’t admit it to you or to himself, but a big part of why he asked you who you would have chosen is that he hopes you can give him some insight into what Lilith would have chosen. If she would have made the choice he did.

Once you’ve become good friends with him, he does make an effort to not confuse you with his sister… but it’s hard for him, especially if you look and act like her. He’s really trying!

He would want to hug you for hours after having nightmares of falling. It helps him feel like maybe he’s not a total failure of a protector

He’s giving Mammon a run for his money in terms of being protective of you.

Beel finds himself conflicted after the big reveal. He’s overjoyed to have Belphie back, but he’s so angry with him for hurting you, and also he’s so upset with himself for not realizing Belphie was trapped in the attic the whole time, and ALSO he’s struggling with keeping you separate from Lilith in his mind, similar and genuinely connected as you are, and that makes him feel even more guilty because he genuinely does love you just for yourself. He feels like it’s very mean to you if he lets himself be distracted from that.

This is further complicated by you naturally falling into the role of his baby sister. He loves having you in that role, but it’s hard. A bit triggering. He’s working through it!

All in all, he’s a good big brother. He’d be overjoyed to hear it if you tell him that.

Belphegor:

Learning your name sends him spiralling. He was thinking of this exchange program as a betrayal to Lilith’s memory, he thought Lucifer had forgotten about her, he thought Lucifer didn’t care, but he chose a human named LILY?? Is this him being manipulative, is this coincidence, does it mean he HASN’T stopped caring, does it mean he’s trying to replace their lost baby sister with some human?

Belphie can’t figure it out.

He hangs onto his hatred. He carries out the first steps of his plan

When you meet him, he just… stares. You look like her…

He refuses to cry about it! He sticks to the script, lying to your face as planned, summoning all the hatred and resentment in his fallen heart.

But… you keep coming back. Not just to update him about your pact collecting, but also… just to chat? Checking on him, bringing him small snacks and things that fit through the gaps in the door, telling him about what his brothers are up to, reminding him that Beel misses him terribly and no one has forgotten about him

He’s finding it hard to keep hating you. In all honesty, he’s grown fond of you! But he has a plan and he’s sticking to it! You’re NOT his sister, and nothing short of a miracle can convince him to let go of his resentment!

In timeline A, after the first jailbreak, he never gets around to harming you. He can’t figure out if it’s due to laziness, lack of opportunity, fondness for you on his part, or not wanting to make Beel sad. This becomes irrelevant of course, after Diavolo imprisons him

In timeline B, you’re sent back in time to see how he got released. You open the door, he offers you the hug, you accept.

It’s… nice, for a long moment. Gentle and warm and comfy.

And then he regains his determination, going ahead with his plan to kill you. He gets as far as “Finding it hard to breathe?” before he looks at you. Expecting to feel sadistic satisfaction at seeing a human face screwed up in pain like that. But… you look like his baby sister.

You look just like his baby sister, and you’re scared and hurt. His baby sister… panicking and tearful, because of HIM

He can’t do it

His grip relaxes. He doesn’t let you go, but he’s no longer hurting you.

He’s shaking.

You feel… moisture in your hair. Your throat is bruised and bleeding from his claws digging into your skin. You’re wheezing through your crushed airway. Your brain is flooded with adrenaline. Your prey terror hasn’t let up, as the demon who was threatening your life is still holding you, and he’s CLEARLY still unstable. But, maybe crying from guilt is safer than cold determination to murder you…?

At this point, the others rush in. Mammon tears you away from Belphie. Beel is frozen in horrified confusion. Belphie is having a breakdown on the floor.

Diavolo and Barbatos fill everyone in. Belphie can’t even look at you, he feels so awful.

As you both heal, you get closer. You become real friends. You learn what aspects of the Belphie you knew from the attic were lies, and the surprising amount of things that were true. With everyone’s help, Belphie really digs deep and commits to finally unpacking his trauma and his survivor’s guilt and his grief.

Once you trust him enough—and he trusts himself enough—he takes every opportunity to spoil you. He’ll cuddle you whenever you want, he’ll make sure you don’t get any nightmares, he’ll share his food, he’ll even let you wake him up for dumb things without getting mad at you.

______

I didn’t have many ideas for the rest. I had some for Mammon, but nowhere near as many as for these three. I might add the Mammon ideas as a short bonus later, if I have the energy or any more inspiration.

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me headcanons #obey me x reader #obey me & reader #obey me fic #obey me writing #obey me platonic headcanons #obey me lucifer #obey me beel #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me belphie #request #my writing

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barefoothighlander · 1 year

Note

Hi! I hope you're well.

I have a request that may not be achievable and thats okay! Really, its just a thought.

What if the reader is a new recruit to the team and has the nickname 'Reaper' due to her skull Balaclava and skill (https://www.tumblr.com/men-wearing-masks/652072573328392192/skull-mask-week-day-47?source=share) from her other teams.

They're mainly a sniper but are amazing at everything. They're smaller than the rest of the team (I'm picturing an afab) but they're silent and bring death with them.

For example; Ghost is noticeable by his naturally intimidating presence but Reaper cannot be noticed unless you're actually looking for them, and when they pass, it feels as if a cold shiver has gone down your spine.

I picture this being a Ghost x reader because they're just as good as ghost, if not better, and everyone teases him about that. Making jokes about how reader is on top because a Reaper is higher up the chain than a ghost. Then I feel like on a mission reader gets sick of it, but in an attempt to be 'part of the team' they make a joke that's sexual in nature about her being on top which just sets ghost off.

If you don't do anything with this, totally understand, hope this wasn't just a silly rant though 'xD

Much love,

🔳

ok, sorry this took me so long to respond to I was trying to flesh it out but I hope it fits what you imagined

warnings: typical violence, death

“Hostiles are taken care of, you’re clear for entry” You call it in through your comms, you’re sat high on a hill, hidden from view by the dark as the team infiltrates.

“Copy Reaper, moving in”

You walk as Ghost and Soap make their way into the building, changing your sight to check in on windows.

“I’ve got eyes on two, south east window”

No response

“Alpha team I’ve got eyes on two, how copy?”

The comms are silent, you don’t think you just move, sprinting down the hill before you’re in front of the target building, you can hear the echoes of gunshots.

“Soap I’m at the entrance, what’s going on in there”

You hear someone inside yell, deciding to rush in to cover, you make your way through the rooms, clearing them before heading up the stairs to follow the noise. You see muzzle flashes at the end of the hallway, you slowly make your way down before turning into a room, Soaps backed against a wall struggling with one of the men, you raise your gun to fire but your arms are quickly pushed away,

“Reaper, on your left”

You struggle against the man in front of you, using your foot you kick at his knee knocking him down, your knife raising to plant in his neck before you pull it out, throwing it across the room, it lands in the shoulder of the man strangling Soap, he screams in pain and Soap is able to push him off to kill him.

“Thanks”

You nod your head, “Where’s Ghost?”

“We split down a hallway, comms went dead a few seconds after”

“Why do these always turn into rescue missions”

“Maybe he likes being saves by you”

You roll your eyes at him, picking up your gun and advancing around the building, there’s no sign of Ghost in the rooms.

“Stay inside, I’ll search the perimeter” You say

“Stick to the shadows” Soap winks

You make your way outside, creeping around the dark spots of the yard as you slice through the few remaining hostiles, you come across Ghost in the garage, he’s focused on some computer as you approach.

“Thought you went missing”

Your presence surprises him,

“Clear the building?”

“No thanks to you”

“I did my part” He gestures towards the two dead men on the opposite side of the room, “Got what we came for, let’s go”

You meet back up with Soap at the front of the house, making your way to the rendezvous point,

"You better thank your God that Reaper was here to save your ass LT"

"I was fine"

"Not counting the hostiles swarming you" You jump in

Ghost glares at you as the three of you make your way onto the heli for evac. Arriving back at base Ghost is practically silent, sparing you few words during your ride while Soap talks your ear off, there's something off about Ghost but you can't place it, you decide to leave it be.

The base is bustling when you arrive, people running everywhere, your attention being drawn all around until Price shouts for you,

"Reaper, need you on the next car out"

"Just me Sir?"

"Just you, need the best" He nudges your shoulder, you turn to see Ghost standing behind you, fists clenched at his side,

"You've got competition LT" Soap jokes running past you, Ghost walks away without a word, leaving you standing alone.

Your mission was a success, in and out, just you with Price covering from the sky. You managed to clear the building without being detected, sticking to the shadows as you dropped hostiles one by one.

Your muscles ached arriving back, simply wanting to shower and sleep except Soap had forced you invited you to join the team for a drink, figuring it was an easy way to fit into the team you accepted.

The team was already a few drinks down when you arrived, Ghost catching your attention as he sat in the corner, leaned back in his chair.

"There ya are" Soap shouts from across the pub, hollering you over to their table, you sit and he hands you a beer, you feel the cool glass against your warm palm, eyes darting around the room.

"So is there something about the masks that the rest of us don't get?" Soap asked, pointing between you and Ghost, you tilt your head in question,

"No, no correlation"

"Just coincidence?"

"Just coincidence" You nod

"Well just seems that LT's been knocked down a peg since you showed up, no longer the scary lad in a mask compared to you"

You glare to your side, you can see how Ghost's face contorts under his mask, fumes practically coming from his face,

"Ghost is just as good as me"

"Ghost can't do what you can believe me," Soap laughs, taking another sip of his drink

"That'll do Johnny" His voice booms in your ears,

"You think you're better than me Ghost?" You say, suddenly filled with courage, he doesn't afford you a response, he simply stares back at your masked face.

"You do" Your words are cut off by Johnny

"Is it that mask?" He turns to Ghost,

"What?"

"S'that why you're always buggin' Reaper, you like them, some sort of mask kink?"

Your eyes go wide at his words, your chest suddenly feeling tight,

"You like a strong woman LT?" Soap laughs

Ghost's next movements are quick, he stands from the table practically knocking over everyone's drinks before his hands are at Soap's throat, Price jumps to pull him off but it's no use.

"Keep your fuckin mouth closed Sargeant"

Soap sobers up instantly, nodding under Ghost's grip before being released, there are murmurs around the pub as Ghost exits, the air is thick with tension.

The rest of the night was quiet, the men keeping their jokes to themselves out of fear of Ghost somehow hearing. The next day on base was even more awkward, strange tension between the team had unfolded as Ghost barely spoke a word to anyone all day.

A few hours later you make your way to the gym, completely surprised to see the Lieutenant there you eye him as you enter, setting up on the large mat in the centre of the room.

You watch as he moves to stand in front of you, his stare pinning you down,

"Ready?" He asks, you nod before lunging at him, your arms wrapping around his waist as you dig your feet into the mat trying to push him backward.

You grapple for a few minutes, both of you refusing to tap out, intent on proving you are better than the other, you manage to trip him and he falls with his back flat on the mat. Your legs move to straddle over his torso, your arms pinning him down as you cover his form, your heavy breaths filling the air.

"Guess I really am on top" You laugh

Without a second thought, he thrusts his hips, throwing you off him so he can flip your form, pinning you against the mat, you're caged under his form as he pins you flat, there's no chance of getting out. You writhe against his grip but he doesn't falter, simply staring you down,

"Give up?"

"Not a chance" You continue to struggle against his grip,

"You're just gonna tire yourself out"

"Using weight against your opponent is cheating"

"It's smart, you're small but quick, and I'm more than double your size"

"Get off" You huff

"Tap out"

"Admit I'm better than you"

He laughs at your words, releasing his grip before standing, he lets you get up, your hands rubbing at your wrists as you move across the room, you turn around and he's in front of you. He forces you back his strides pushing you back until you collide with the wall, you tilt your head from him, his mouth inches from your ear, you can feel his breath ghosting over your skin.

"You may be better in the field" He pulls back to face you, his dark eyes glued to yours as your body stands still, "But I'm always on top" You can see his smirk under his mask as he leaves, you're frozen in your spot, his words replaying in your head.

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forgetminot · 1 year

Text

Trust Me.

♡ Leon Kennedy x !gn reader ♡

[ Warnings : Trust issues, angst, fluff, read from the readers view (low self-esteem, confidence, trust issues etc) , soft Leon ]

Author's Note : I started this off thinking it was going to be full on explosive angst and then ended it with fluff because I'm too soft. On a serious note mental health is very important and therapy can really help! My dms/requests are always open 💙

Summary : You and Leon bump into Ada on a mission, you struggle to get the thought of her and Leon together out of your head.

It was her, it had always been her. No matter how many times Leon tried to tell you otherwise, you knew. She was a part of him that he couldn't let go, no matter how hard he tried to forget.

"You haven't changed one bit, Leon." She was so confident when she spoke, her hips swaying from left to right as she approached you both. You stood behind Leon, hand holding firmly on the grip of your gun that sat in its holster. She sighed, arms tightly crossed against her chest. "I'm going to need that sample, handsome."

"You know I can't give you it, Ada."

Ada. You knew her name, of course you did. You had heard many stories about the mysterious woman that had saved Leon's life back in Racoon City, you just never thought you'd see her face to face and in the flesh. After all, she was dead- right? That's what Leon had told you, that's what he thought.

"If you don't give me the sample." She raises her gun, aiming it straight at Leon. "I will have to take it from you."

You pull your gun out of its holster, stepping beside Leon and copying Ada's actions. She smiles, her red lips curving into a small smirk.

"Who's this, Leon?" She tilts her head slightly as she speaks. He doesn't reply, instead he places his hand against the barrel of your gun and lowers it.

"Just another agent." He states.

Those words repeat over and over in your head, he didn't mean anything by it; it was the truth, you were just another agent. Another agent that he loved and cherished on a daily basis. His love for you couldn't have been a lie, could it? You felt yourself drifting away, the relationship between you both breaking apart bit by bit.

You loved him, you really did; with every small ounce of your body, you loved him. But did he still love you?

"You okay beautiful?" You gaze up from your position on the couch, legs cradled against your chest. "Lost you for a minute there."

"Mhm." You nod, biting down on your lip; it was something you did when you were thinking, when you were anxious and Leon knew that.

"Talk to me, what's wrong?" He sounds sincere, like he really wants to know how you are feeling, but all you can think about is that its all part of the lie

"Nothing... I'm fine."

'Fine', a word you use to describe yourself when you are totally not fine.

"C'mon, tell me." He leans forward from the opposite end of the sofa, taking your hands in his and you finally snap.

"Stop!" You pull your hands from Leons harshly. "Stop pretending you care, stop pretending that everything is okay when it's not!" He's taken a back from your sudden outburst, hurt covering his face.

"What are you talking about?" He questions.

"Just another agent." You repeat his words. His eyebrows furrow from confusion before it finally clicks.

"This is about Ada?" Her name rolls off the base of his tongue so smoothly and you hate it. You hate how she hasn't even tried and she's breaking you both apart. "Baby, I've told you-"

"I know" You whisper. "I can't get her out of my head Leon." He frowns, placing his hand gently on your thigh.

"I didn't mean to sound harsh on the mission, i was trying to protect you- from her." He sighs deeply. "I love you, so much and I didn't want her getting in the way of that. Of us."

You laugh weekly to yourself, standing up from the sofa and shaking your head from side to side; trying to get rid of all the nasty thoughts swarming around in your head. Leon is quick to stand, cupping your face in his hands. "I'm sorry." You stare up into Leon's eyes, tears dripping down your cheeks. "I try- I try not to think about it." You raise your hand, wiping your tears with your sweater sleeve. "It's just- the way she looked at you. She still cares about you Leon, i know it." He pulls you close, burying your face into the crook of his neck and places a gentle kiss to your temple.

"Maybe she does." He states. "But that doesn't mean I still care about her, not in the same way I care about you." You nod weakly. "You need to trust me and i know that's hard for you-"

"I do trust you, Leon." You smile gently, inhaling his scent.

"Promise, next time you feel like this you will tell me?" He asks.

"I will, i promise." Leon takes your hand, sitting back down on the sofa and pulling you down with him. "I'm sorry." You say, repeating your previous words.

"Don't be, i understand." He places his hand on the nape of your neck, bringing your head down to his and pressing his lips against yours lovingly. "We both need therapy." He chuckles as he pulls away from you. You nod in agreement.

"I think we do..." You giggle.

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rottiens · 2 months

Text

GONER | GOJŌ SATORU

✮ wc. . 2.3K

✮ tags. . angst, fem reader, major character death, manga spoilers. divider creds: cafekitsune.

✮ about. . a sequence of events that begin with you ending your relationship make you reflect on the effect your decisions have on the future.

How long is "forever"? For a child who is left in line at a supermarket while their mother goes back to get something else to put in the cart probably a long time, for someone who is sick it probably feels like an eternity.

For someone to whom you tell for a whole year that you love them, and that you will always be together probably the phrase ceases to carry the same weight as when it was first said, after a few months, one of you may say the words because they sound nice rather than because you really mean it.

Looking back you're not sure you remember it very well. The scene is a blur in your head, just like those old VHS's where you start in one scene and if it wasn't cautiously recorded it ends up jumping to a totally different one. You're not sure exactly what you said or how it sounded, nor what he responded to hearing you say it, you struggle to remember because it's important now.

You can't quote the exact words that came out of your mouth but you have etched in your memory his flushed cheeks, the way the gentle breeze ruffled his hair naturally. Everything felt like slow motion or at least that's how it's saved in your head, you think the detail of his blush was stored so clearly in your memories because you've never seen him so red before.

His face was just like a painter's canvas that had had a big red stain spilled down the center.

"Come on. Let's go home before it rains," Satoru suggests, ignoring the knife you casually plunge into his chest.

You clutch the black bag hanging from your shoulder tightly to your body and avoid his blue eyes at all costs, after all, the oval sunglasses do little to hide them and you don't know if you'd rather he was wearing the blindfold today. You glance down at his high-soled loafers, as shiny and shimmering as the rest of his outfit. You divert your eyes to his briefly to stall for time and refocus on your shoes.

He calls your name, reaches out his hand breaking the infinite distance between you and you pull back adding more space. You think you hear his heart break.

"You can't be serious." His hand returns to his side in submission, his throat rising and falling swallowing saliva. "Are you serious?"

"I want to focus on other things."

"I'm unfocusing you?" Satoru laughs dryly, briefly bringing a hand to his chest pointing to himself before lowering it.

"I'm not sure if we're compatible, I think we're only together because we're both lonely."

His lower lip trembles because what you said was a low blow, it's not fair for you to mention the things he's secretly told you while you were snuggled under the covers of his bed for a situation like this. Concern flashes fleetingly across his face along with a lightning bolt that breaks the sky. The parking lot is practically empty, there are couple of cars scattered around as if it had been put there specifically as part of the scenery, you lose yourself in satoru's porsche behind him, gray as the cotton clouds that suffocate the sky, the flash of the kisses you have shared, the laughter, the secrets that stay stranded in it stick in your chest like a sharp arrow but you quickly disguise it by blinking fast and pretending to smooth out the non-existent wrinkles in your clothing.

The silence is heavy. Satoru stares at you so intently that you think he has forgotten to blink.

Satoru opens his mouth but the sudden torrent of water that flows over your head startles you. Satoru gets wet in seconds which makes you wonder why he doesn't activate his infinity and take refuge in his technique, why he stands next to you as if made of stone, still contemplating you.

"You're tearing me apart!" he shouts through the sound of the rain collapsing against the pavement, the water making his shirt cling to his chest, his white skin glistening through the fabric.

"I'm so sorry."

You need to run from there, the rain is everywhere just like the pain that covers your body from head to toe. You feel it all over, crushing your bones, squeezing your lungs and stealing your breath. You are ready to run and flee by his side, but his long fingers stop you, catch your wrists and pull you to him.

Leaving you no escape he pulls you into a forced kiss full of hunger and resentment, his fingers squeeze your cheeks tightly almost as if he's forcing you to stay close but it doesn't matter if he hadn't, you wouldn't have pulled away anyway. He brushes your tongue with his, you let him taste you one last time as he tastes the trace of the drink you were given at the event you attended only minutes before.

The perfect couple, he strongest next to the best sorceress, everyone was talking about the children they would have together, about the future of both clans and the great family they would form, all without asking you first about how you felt. You immerse yourself in a lot of expectations that you have to live up to when all you want is to survive at the end of the day, with so much pressure from your family and the higher ups it is only logical that the band that keeps your appearance of the perfect woman stretches and torn.

You hate yourself for doing this to him before he leaves on a week long mission away from you but you think it's the perfect time for him to detox from you.

As you pull away to breathe he still holds your cheeks possessively, gazing at you just like the most valuable object on display. You can't know what those pretty eyes that hide a sea in them are saying, but you wouldn't blame him for hating you.

"Let me take you home," he asks in a raspy voice and you shake your head.

You can't be near him alone again, not in his car, not in your apartment.

Then Satoru releases your cheeks and they immediately burn from the absence of his fingers and embarrassment, he takes the longest backward step he can and lets you run away from him, literally and metaphorically.

That was the last time you saw him, after leaving him soaking wet in the rain.

It's not like you were desperate to see him again but you weren't sure that would be the last time you'd see his face either. With everything that happened after that day you purposely decided to avoid him, you took missions as far away from Tokyo as you could, avoided going to school on the days he would be working as a teacher and ran away from every social activity you know he would be involved in… little by little the big strong couple fell apart until people accepted that it wasn't a rumor and that you two were really over.

Then he was called to Shibuya along with the other sorcerers who were available. Conveniently you were in Latin America, too far from home to do anything more than hope that all your friends made it out alive from the massacre that was happening there while all you could do was wait and find a plane ticket as fast as you could. You had your phone taped to your chest all night at the airport and all day until you got off the plane until Yaga personally called you to tell you the details.

Satoru Gojo was locked up in the prison realm, I have a death sentence on my head… You'd be lying if you said you heard anything else after that. The phone rolled free from your hand to the ground, crashing to the concrete of the street in a muffled sound.

On your way back you found Tokyo in a mess. Shibuya seemed to have been crushed by a large black hole that consumed and destroyed everything in its path, that it had been a phenomenon fallen from space would have been easier to deal with than admitting that the monster that had created that was still there, hiding in Itadori's body lurking like a predator ready to strike at the precise moment and you could do nothing but wait for it. Guilt digs into your chest as deep as a knife, you refuse to cry and swallow the pain like a hard pill, you should have been there.

Since then you did everything you could to rescue Satoru as you know he's the only one who can take on a now free Sukuna, you can't do it without his help or a logical plan. And after everything that happened between you you feel you owe it to him, as a silent pact that you must keep your word to.

So this is the first time you see him after that afternoon. He looks different from the last time you saw him, maybe it's your fuzzy memories that didn't store the information correctly but he looks bigger even, his hair has grown and his shoulders are broader.

"I knew you'd be here," he jokes in his usual tone.

Here, away from the show his students prepared to welcome him as the celebrity he is. Your belly was in knots and you didn't want to see him, you weren't ready.

You want to slap him for being the first thing he says after months of not seeing each other, for treating you like the sweet friend you always were to him because you feel you don't deserve it, but instead and against all odds you pounce on him. Your arms wrap around his waist embracing an infinite cold emptiness that then materializes in the warm body of your partner.

You hadn't realized how much you missed him until now, until his fingers melt into your hair massaging your skull and pulling you further into him, until you hear him unabashedly sniff your hair and say between giggles how much he missed the smell of your shampoo, you soak his black t-shirt in your tears while his chest burns. You feel safe, you feel at home, and you realize that everything you did was a mistake.

As you lift your clouded eyes to him, you see everything blurred by the raindrops threatening to overflow like that day yet at the same time, you have never seen so clearly in your life.

I love you so much, I'm so sorry - It's at least what you would have liked to say before he interrupted you, his lips make you weep when they touch your forehead so soft, so delicate, you want to stay here forever, you want to tell him to quit, you don't have to save anyone else, you want to tell him to run away with you, that you're ready to start a family and grow old together but you know what he's going to say. Instead, his words make you keep silent:

"You can tell me all that when I get back, I have a lot to tell you too."

You hit the cold table hard where half of Satoru's body rests and the whole room shudders as your cursed energy emanates from you in great waves.

"You promised you'd come back so get up off that fucking table," you sniffle through your nose without letting a single tear fall. Shoko next to you says your name as low as if she doesn't want to be heard, her fingers squeezing your shoulder feels like she's doing it with pity, like she's comforting you, why is she doing it? Perhaps it's her way of telling you that that's it . "Tell me you can do something." You look her straight in the eyes but she keeps quiet, like everyone else, no one dares to speak or scream, why is everyone acting like this is part of the plan? Why are you the only one sinking into a deep salty sea? "Shoko, fuck!"

She shakes her head. "I'm sorry."

Your knees fail you and you have to lie down on his legs, hiding your face in the white sheet covering what's left of him, your heart dropping to your stomach as something sour and bitter rises up your esophagus.

"Leave me alone." That's all you ask, you don't get up to see if she's heard you over your voice drowned out by the white cloth.

The smell of the hospital and medication, unused gloves and alcohol makes your gut knot, it's all too much. You can barely breathe, your throat burns and it would be so much easier to feel a curse tearing you from the inside out.

"You promised…" you sob again hugging the corpse of the one you recognize today as the love of your life. "I'm so sorry," you mumble with a mouthful of saliva.

When you broke up with satoru you missed him every day, every hour, everything reminded you of him because you didn't just lose a boyfriend, you lost a friend. You missed him but you knew you were going to see him again someday, when the symptoms of grief would subside for both of you, maybe you could even get back the friend you lost because of your relationship but now, missing Satoru is a feeling of anguish that won't go away, because you can't call him anymore, you can't show him the pictures you took in the day, you won't be able to hear his voice again, you won't be able to hold his hand again….. It is a loop of a feeling of emptiness that cannot be filled with anything because he is now gone forever, a black hole that no matter how hard you try to fill it with things and people it will not fill, because nothing and no one will be able to take his place.

And for a person who has lost a loved one who told them that he would be there with them until they grow old, forever is a long time.

notes. . ngl this is really a catharsis for me. i miss a person who is no longer with me irl and what better than to open my heart and let out some of the pain through one of the characters i adore the most <3

thanks for reading! Reblogs are appreciated. And don't forget to spend time with your loved ones and remind them how much you love them whenever you can.

#wr #gojo drabbles #jjk drabbles #gojo x you #gojo x reader #gojo x y/n #gojo angst #gojo satoru x you #gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru angst

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phantomrose96 · 7 months

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hi your short story is giving me absolute brainworms it’s DAMN good. I don’t have anything of real note to add so I’ll just ask: is there anything you really want to say about the story but haven’t yet (like trivia or whatnot)?

(938 Seconds Per Second)

Probably that I'd very nearly abandoned it!

The idea started from an article I was reading about time dilation - the gist of it being "okay but what's to stop you from accelerating infinitely? Up to and past the speed of light?" and the conclusion was kind of "you sort of can... from YOUR frame, from YOUR perception of time, potentially. but from a resting frame, you will appear to only ever approach the speed of light." So even if you could perceive yourself traveling 100 light years in a month... to every resting body, 100 years have passed.

So I was like cool! Fucked up potential! I really liked the concept of "you can notice your mistake after 5 minutes and already be 100 years too late to fix it."

I toyed with a few ideas and ended up gravitating towards "what if one shipmate intentionally leaves another shipmate behind... and by the time this is discovered days later, the left-behind shipmate is long dead." I also settled on "what if your shipmate sucked so bad that he causes you to snap and leave him behind"

So I started writing with that as the core idea. Main character Mendoza has the Worst Coworker in the World Universe, and he snaps and leaves Carson behind on a planet.

...But then I was a little lost. I was struggling with the substance. The "what makes this interesting" and the "what ties this all together." Sure I could just write Carson being an ass for 3,000 words and then... Mendoza leaves him behind the end?

I was even struggling with the first draft because part of me was like "what's even enjoyable about reading about a completely insufferable person...?" Even Mendoza himself is no peach. Maybe the whole concept was just unpalatable. I kinda just... ditched it where it was.

Then I came back to it this weekend and decided to kind of rethink it, fresh. And the absolute biggest difference between the early stumbling draft and what I ended up with was Sampson. He actually solved so much. (He existed in the early draft, but not importantly.) He introduced the character stakes and the tying thread to the story I was missing.

Now it wasn't just Carson annoying Mendoza. Once Sampson's tome enters the story, the stakes change. Mendoza is now in the middle of Carson actively destroying the thing Sampson is even alive for. Mendoza is now in a position of actively needing to make choices--he could intervene and try to save Sampson's tome. He could tattle. He could do anything--but he doesn't. Because "not letting Carson win" is the single most important thing. Mendoza doesn't need to be any kind of hero. He chooses not to be.

And now the reader is captive to this conflict, privy to everything Mendoza knows, and does not act on, as Sampson unravels in the background.

And now we have a thread that leads to Carson and Mendoza ending up on-planet together. Carson isn't out there for shits and giggles, he's out there because the plot point about Sampson's tome led to this. Now Carson knows about the cargo, and now he's offering Mendoza the chance to not just be passive witness, but be accomplice to Sampson's destruction.

And it's enticing. It's unimaginable wealth, and it's getting off the shitty ship, and it's never seeing Carson again. Mendoza has the chance to stick to his every-man-for-himself ideals and go along with Carson. And it's interesting to explore Carson's reasoning for why they deserve this! They're the ones who sacrificed 300 years for this journey! Don't they deserve this over some fucker who wasn't even born when this mission started?

And then it reaches one pivotal moment--Carson's gleeful declaration that Sampson will totally kill himself once he discovers what they've stolen. Because now there are consequences to this action. If Mendoza follows through with this, it's with the knowledge that he's gotten Sampson killed. (And maybe he shouldn't care. Maybe it doesn't matter. As he's asserted this whole time.)

Mendoza doesn't do it. He pulls up the ladder after Carson.

He doesn't let Carson win.

And then the ending... the ending where Sampson very much was witness to Mendoza following Carson out of the ship. If Sampson were every-man-for-himself, he could just comply and tell Major Kensington what he saw. Mendoza knew Carson was outside the ship. Mendoza came back. Carson didn't. The ship took off. Sampson knows this all.

But, Sampson has an idea of what, may, have happened. He knows he accidentally revealed too much to Carson. He knows Carson stole the tome which contains information about the cargo. Sampson, maybe, knows what decision Mendoza made.

So Sampson lies to Kensington. Sampson will swear on his life he never saw Mendoza that evening. No one will ever know.

And just!!! It was delightful to find the piece that ties the WHOLE story through. It's not just "your coworker sucks and you booted him to live out 40 years on a planet for your next 2 weeks". It's character-driven now. It's about choices and consequences and the fucked up implications that the time-dilation travel throws in.

#938sps #thank you sdkjdsjjhsd

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darkficsyouneveraskedfor · 9 months

Text

Carpe Noctem 8

Warnings: dark elements, noncon, age gap, gaslighting, manipulation, other dark elements. Proceed with caution. (short!reader)

Note:Please let me know what you think as it helps me a lot with ideas and I love interacting with you all.

Part of The Club AU

You leave the motel under a cloud of reluctance and relief. You have little to your name but your wallet, phone, and a few snacks. Hesitation keeps you stagnant behind the wheel, hovering over the address saved on your maps. This is it, hit start and accept your fate.

You put your phone on the passenger's seat as the automated voice directs you. You shift into gear and pull out. Disbelief fades to indifference. You don't have the energy to feel.

You follow along, in autopilot, until the GPS announces your destination on the right. You slow down and look up at the large house. Of course. He's rich. Dirty rich.

You pull down the long lot and stop to the right side of the double garage door. You don't get out immediately, you lean back and close your eyes. You try to sort through your thoughts. It's not that big of a deal. Sleep here, go to work, find anywhere else to be during the day.

There's a rumble on the seat beside you and you snatch up your phone. You drag your thumb across the screen to answer, too late to change your mind. It's him. Of course it's him.

"Don't say a word, sweetheart," Lloyd looks down his nose at the lens, "I just need you to see this."

He switches cameras and you squint as he points it at a familiar wooden door. No. The brass numbers confirm his location; your home. Former home.

His hand knocks on the door as he shifts the phone in his hand.

"Lloyd! Stop. No, don't–"

"Fair warning, sunshine, I got you on mute, so if you're tryna change my mind, it won't work." He knocks again, pounding on the door.

As the door opens, Lloyd's fist flies from the edge and snaps Johnny's jaw. You watch the other man stagger and grip his cheek, only for a moment, before swinging back at his attacker. The picture skews as Lloyd dodges and his foot hits Johnny’s chest and sends him onto his ass.

"Think that's about even," Lloyd clucks as he enters your apartment and steps over Johnny.

He leads with the lens, giving you a glimpse of the front room as he inspects it. He finds his way into the bedroom and hums. He goes to the dresser, opening a drawer then shutting it as all he finds are Johnny's briefs. He slides out the next one and picks out a few neatly folded panties.

"You keep a nice place, sweetie pie," he remarks. "Boring…" he comments as he examines a pair of your cotton panties.

You want to cry. You want to just wilt away to nothing. Why is he doing this?

The camera blurs in a smear of colours suddenly and Lloyd grunts. You hear Johnny and a struggle. Banging, clattering, and clamoring. You hear them locked in contention, helpless as you're stuck staring at a wall.

Another growl and an unsettling thump. The phone lifts and Lloyd snorts as you get a glimpse of him, his nose slightly bloody. He puts the phone down and you hear the drawer snap shut.

"See ya soon, baby cakes," he says, slightly breathless, "make yourself cozy… don't miss me too much."

He taps the screen and the call ends. You gape at your phone and whimper as you slump forward. Shit. You're totally fucked and you have a feeling Lloyd knows exactly that.

You lock your phone and sigh. Well, no going back now.

You get out of the car and look around. It's a nice neigbourhood, a bit far from work but not terrible. God, you're really going to do this.

'High five, fuck, go on our way.'

His words reverberate. Does he really want that? From you? Surely you could just pay rent.

You head up the walk and pull up the passcode. You punch it into the keypad on the door and it beeps, a green light granting you access.

Inside, the entry is airy and bright. You pause to take it all in. You check your phone again. Maybe you should go to the apartment and make sure they're not killing each other. Or maybe you should let them. You might avoid a lot of trouble if you just stop trying so hard.

There's a table against the curved rail of the staircase. You near as you give a curious look to the basket on top. White with a bright pink ribbon snaked around the handle. Inside, you find various boxes, taking the first to cringe at the small bullet vibe through the plastic window of the packaging.

The rest of the contents are similar; bottles of lube, stimulating salve, toys, clamps, and even a few panties without much fabric. Jesus. You leave the array of erotic aids but take the small envelope from in front of it. He knew. He knows you have no other option and he's entirely prepared.

Inside the card, ignoring the exterior image of a dildo and butt plug beneath a pun, you find script typed in Arial. 'Welcome to the sex shack. Make yourself at home. Yours is the room with the tie on the handle. Leave it on for when I get there.'

Gross. Not just him, you. There can be no doubt that his intent is just as shallow and sick as he is as a person. But you, you're not going to walk out and sleep in your car. Just like with Johnny, you will roll over and take it.

#lloyd hansen #dark lloyd hansen #dark!lloyd hansen #lloyd hansen x reader #The gray man #Au #Drabble #Series #carpe noctem

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cc1010fox · 3 months

Text

Episode 7

Fox: I know what I want to do...I know what would make me happy... Cody: Hurry! They're starting! Wolffe, shoving past Cody who's moving too slowly for him: Let me in! Bly: Wait! Did they already say something? What did I miss? Rex: Fox said he knows what he wants to do! Cody: Gree, hurry! Thire: You don't look so certain, Fox... Fox: ... Cody: Force, just say it! Gree, jogging in through the door: Hey, Fox! I thought I might find you here! Fox, looking surprised: Gree! Gree, wrapping Fox up in a hug: You look stressed, as always. Fox, hugging him back tightly: You have a keen eye...as always, ori'vod... Cody: Wait a kriffing minute... Rex: No... Wolffe: No. No, I REFUSE TO BELIEVE-- Bly, in total disbelief: He's part of the show... Gree, after pulling out of the hug: Am I interrupting something? Thire: No. You're just in time to stop Fox from making a hasty decision. I'll leave you two alone. Fox: No, Thire. I-- Thire, laying a hand on Fox's shoulder: Talk to him, Fox... Wolffe: GREE, YOU LYING BASTARD! Cody: SHHH! Gree, after Thire exits the office: How serious is it? Fox: This decision could mean the difference between me having a tolerable life on Coruscant and me putting a hole through my helmet. Rex: Yikes. Too real... Gree: Fox'ika...Whatever it is, I'm sure it's not-- Fox: It's about my relationship... Gree: Oh...I thought you were happy...I thought Thorn was making you happy...? Rex: I'm not surprised the traitor is Team Thorn. Wolffe: TRAITOR! Cody: SHHH!!! Bly, whispering: Team Love. Fox, sighing: Thire might have been the one making me happy all along. We've been having an affair... Gree: Fox. Fox: I didn't realize we were having an affair... Rex: Because it was so easy and fun~. Cody, rolling his eyes: He's easy and fun. Wolffe, snorting: You're not wrong. Gree: How did you not realize--? Look, that's--Ok, what is this decision you're making? Between Thorn and Thire? Fox: Yes... Gree: Fox, the last time I saw you, you were practicing the marriage vows...You love Thorn... Cody: Team THORN! Rex: Choose a team and stick with it! Bly, gasping: The marriage vows? Wolffe: He was that serious about him? What happened? Fox: I do love him...I would die for Thorn. Kriff, I live for Thorn... Cody: Damn...Why can't Fox love me? Bly: He'd cheat on you, you know... Cody, snorting: I'd cheat on him too. Have you seen my Jedi? Gree: Then why are you struggling with this decision? Fox: Because I realized I love Thire too...and Thire is my best friend... Gree: That...is not the same love, Fox... Fox: No, I mean he's my best friend and I love him. Gree: ...I see... Fox: I think...I'm just going to continue with the affair, you know? Only we'll acknowledge that we love each o-- Gree, sternly: No. Rex: All is forgiven. Gree's character is the only one with any sense! Wolffe, digging in Cody's pouch for a snack: He used his commander voice on him. Cody: It was kind of h--HEY! STAY OUT OF MY POUCHES! Bly: Talk some sense into him, Gree. Gree: You can't do that to Thorn. You can't do that to the reason you've survived this long on this planet. He saved your life, Fox...You might not realize it, but, for the past year, the only times you have smiled during our conversations was when you were talking about Thorn. Rex: Oh no... Cody: Whoa... Wolffe: Kriff... Bly, grabbing onto Wolffe and shaking him since he's closest: WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME? MY HEART CAN'T TAKE IT! Fox: ...You're right...I can't...stay here another minute. Stone is going to kick my shebs if I'm late. Gree: Let me out before you. These guys are going t-- Wolffe: DON'T EVEN TRY IT! GREE! YOU FAKE BASTARD! Cody: NO, DON'T END IT THERE! Rex: I need a drink... Bly: I'm...crying real tears right now... Wolffe: Force, you really are! Cody: FOX, LOOK WHAT YOU DID! GET BACK HERE AND CONTINUE THE SCENE!

Episodes: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6

#Commander Fox #Commander Thire #Commander Thorn #Commander Cody #Captain Rex #Commander Wolffe #Commander Bly #Commander Gree #Vencuyanir ‖ Queue

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she-who-fights-and-writes · 9 months

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Do you have any advice for writing your first draft?

I’ve just finished an outline for a fic of mine, and like all my projects I abandoned them at the first draft because I lose interest in the story.

So, how can I stay interested long enough to complete my draft and move on to actually finishing the story?

HOW TO WRITE A FIRST DRAFT

A first draft is the hardest draft you will ever write; it’s creating something from nothing, without the benefit of using a previous draft as a base. Obstacles such as writer’s block and motivation may oppose you at every turn, and it can be easy to get sidetracked and frustrated when you have ideas for the “middle” of the story but somehow can’t get to it.

Just know that everyone is different and writes in a way that works for them, so don’t feel pressured if these tips don’t work for you or don't fit your style of writing!

1. Start With a Good Outline

Since you don’t have a previous draft as a foundation for your writing, your outline will take the place of this! Refer to my posts below:

How to Outline

Plotting for Pansters and Pantsing for Plotters

You can also refer to my FAQ, which includes a variety of resources on getting started. This includes posts on how to get into writing fiction, how to write consistently, and how to combat writer's block!

2. Know that You Don’t Have to Write in Chronological Order

Write what inspires you! If you have no idea what your first scene is going to be but have very specific ideas about a coffee shop interaction during the middle of the book, write the coffee shop scene instead of staring at your blank word doc for an hour and giving up!

Writing is better than not writing, even if it’s not the part of your story that you “need” to get done. In fact, it can be easier (and more cohesive!) to write all of the major scenes you’re excited about first and connect them together, than to write out everything in the order from start to finish.

3. Give Yourself Permission to Write Incomprehensible Garbage

This goes hand-in-hand with the tips I highlight in my post about overcoming writer’s block. When it comes to a first draft, DONE IS BETTER THAN PERFECT, and QUANTITY OVER QUALITY. It is totally okay if your first draft is covered in placeholders for scenes and conversations that you don’t feel like writing.

For example, rather than getting stuck on writing about your characters on the car ride to the carnival, just write and highlight in red “THEY DRIVE TO THE CARNIVAL” and come back to it later. That way, you can have fun actually writing the carnival scene instead of struggling to write the stuff leading up to it. Momentum is the key to getting your first draft done, not producing writing that “sounds good.”

If you’re just going to go back and edit it later, why bother getting stuck on that now? This leads me into my next point:

4. STOP EDITING!!!

When it comes to a first draft, opening up the doc and editing the things you already wrote for the 712123979843th time is not progress; now you just have one REALLY good scene and no rest of the story. Save the editing for later; you’re more likely to lose steam and feel stuck if you keep getting caught on the same things over and over again.

I am calling myself out on this one, as I am INCREDIBLY guilty of using editing and rewriting as an excuse to not write new material, but unfortunately it has to be said. Having it in your mind that you’re making progress when in reality you’re using editing as an avoidant technique will not help you in the long run (as much as I wish it would).

This can sometimes be helped by writing each chapter (or scene that’s getting you stuck) in a new document so that you have no choice but to focus on what you’re currently writing; sometimes the temptations of editing are too great to resist when you have all of your writing in one place!

5. Set Specific Goals and Document Your Progress

Setting goals helps you break up the huge task of “writing a book” into more manageable chunks.

For example, heading into a writing session with the goal “finish this chapter” or “finish this scene” or “write this dialogue” can make it easier to overcome writer’s block; you are solely dedicating your focus on doing this specific task, and are less likely to get distracted. It’s better than barging head-first into it with no direction, and may also have the added bonus of keeping your writing cohesive.

Documenting your progress can help hold you accountable for reaching the goals that you set. If you like to perform under pressure, maybe you can document your progress online or with a friend; that way, you feel a bit of a pushback from outside sources to get things done! Keeping consistent will also help in maintaining a steady flow of inspiration—you’re always thinking ahead!

However, you should remember that life happens, so don’t beat yourself up if you’re struggling to reach your goals or deadlines! Nobody is a writing machine!

Hope this helps, and happy writing!

#writing #writeblr #booklr #writing tips #writing advice #writing help #writing guide #writing resource #writing resources #writing ref #first draft

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