#I swear to God I'm almost finished with a lot of them right now
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#me rn:#I swear to God I'm almost finished with a lot of them right now#just you wait bros#☆ kiana's little talks ☽
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✷ ITOSHI RIN x reader. fluff, established relationship. reader talks a lot and rin listens. this is actually pointless. warnings: the writing is kinda messy, i think. note: i just really think that rin <3 ! sorry if there's typos.
"shut up."
rin probably says these two words to you more than he says 'i love you'.
yet, he really, really does not want you to shut up.
it's been twenty minutes since you came from your dinner with your friend. twenty whole minutes of you rambling. twenty whole minutes of rin lying in bed, his arms feeling empty since you're too busy turned away from him as you change into more comfortable clothes. twenty whole minutes of him having to listen to your friend's husband's family's problems while his eyes stay locked on you as you throw on one of his shirts and then start removing your make up.
and again, he really, really does not want you to shut up.
but he would really prefer holding you while you ramble, and the fact that it's been twenty minutes and he hasn't even gotten a kiss yet is kind of starting to get to him.
"so anyway, she's basically hated by everyone from his side of the family— and i told her over and over that she should talk to him about it, but she just won't listen to me. god, why am i blessed with such stubborn friends?"
at this point, he feels like he's skipped eight chapters.
and yet he still listens, humming thoughtfully as he shifts in bed a little, pulling the covers over him just a bit more as he sighs in defeat, staring up at the ceiling as he mumbles, giving his own opinion. "shouldn't pressure her into it, though."
you groan, giving him a look as you still stand in front of the mirror while doing your skincare now. "i'm not, i swear! those people suck. she shouldn't be letting them do what they want and i'm sure that her husband would do something if he knew how salty they are."
his eyes go from the ceiling to you, blinking sleepily as he stares at the way his shirt looks on you. "when are you coming to bed?"
"almost done, rinnie."
he yawns quietly, turning around so that his back is to you. if he couldn't hold you yet, he could at least listen to your voice. "then does she really plan to just endure that treatment?" his voice is muffled by the pillow as he asks, setting you off on another talking spree.
"i guess she does. i hope everything goes well for her. but personally, i would not tolerate stuff like that." you say, shrugging as you finally finish your business, before going into the bathroom to wash your hands and brush your teeth.
the few minutes of you being gone and quiet make rin feel as miserable as ever.
he waits and waits, eyelids heavy.
when the mattress finally dips next to him and he smells the familiar scent of your skin products, he swears he's never moved this fast to turn around in bed and latch onto you.
you chuckle as he buries his face into your neck, holding him close as your little giggle turns into a quiet laugh when he groans in annoyance. "you took too damn long."
his hair tickles the side of your face. it's getting longer, you realise as you play with it gently, smoothing over some soft strands on the back of his head while he sighs softly into your skin.
"i talked a lot earlier, didn't i?" you ask quietly, your lips curling into a sheepish smile.
rin stays quiet for some time, his arms around you tight and firm as he presses himself against your side, even going as far as to place his muscular leg over you, caging you in against the soft mattress of the bed. "y'know i don't mind that."
"yeah, but im sure there's a limit—"
"there's no limit when it comes to you. 'kay?" he says quietly, his voice groggy and deeper now as he gets closer to drifting off— almost as if he was ending that discussion right there, not wanting to hear you talking about yourself in such a way.
"yeah, but—"
"shut up." he cuts you off, and you stop talking, only to let out another soft laugh. "if you're gonna complain about yourself, that is. now, more sleeping and less talking. i'll listen to the remaining part of your friend's story during breakfast tomorrow."
you snort at his devotion to listening to your silly stories, a slight wave of warmth creeping up your neck. "fine."
he nods a little, before holding you tighter.
"and i didn't get a single kiss from you ever since you came, by the way."
"oh, i am so sorry. my most sincere apologies." you speak, clearly joking as you shower him with light pecks on the side of his face that's peeking out from the crook of your neck.
he grunts, not being able to hide the redness under his warm skin as he feels your soft lips. his eyes stay closed shut. "ok. good night."
"no 'i love you' or anything?"
he sighs heavily. "shut up."
"...and i love you." he adds, before letting himself relax into his sleep when you let out a satisfied sound and say it back to him sweetly, your soft voice partially responsible for putting him to sleep.
#val.talks#blue lock#blue lock x reader#blue lock x y/n#blue lock x female reader#blue lock x you#itoshi rin fluff#itoshi rin x reader#itoshi rin#itoshi rin x you#rin itoshi#rin itoshi x reader#rin itoshi fluff#itoshi rin imagines#itoshi rin x y/n#bllk x reader#bllk#bllk fluff#bllk x you#itoshi rin headcanons#divider credits: cafekitsune
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→ “body party.” || ahn yujin x reader fic.
— a cute girl approaches you about your workout routine in your favorite gym in town, and then very strange but sexy events follow...
word count: 8.7k.
dynamic: dom!bimbo!ahn yujin x sub!gym rat!reader.
content warning: smut, unnie kink?, masturbation, shower sssex 😵💫, fingering, oral, cunnilingus, semi-exhibitionism, voyeurism, body worship, nipple play, oral fixation, (legal!!) age gap, implied piss kink (yeah i'm serious).
requested? : nope. (just me being a whore for yuj again...)
a/n: the lack of yujin gym content while knowing full well that she's a gym rat should be a federal crime.. starship entertainment are you ready to die . anyway, SHE'S FREEEE!!! soooo sorry this took literally FOREVER ya'll but i'm happy i'm finally letting her out the drafts!! i had a lot of fun writing this so i hope ya'll enjoy it!! 💙💙 apologies for any mistakes tho,, I GOTTA GO TO CLASS—
ahn yujin didn’t know what to expect when she entered the gym after weeks of burying herself in her homework, but she certainly didn’t expect to meet a sickeningly pretty and ferociously sexy girl like you.
yujin knew she had to fuck you the moment she laid eyes on you in the changing rooms. you appeared to have just finished working out, judging by your damp hair and the fresh set of clothes you were wearing. yujin had to be discreet with the way she was checking you out considering that you were sitting on a bench only a few ways away from her locker, so she should at least be looking at you from the corner of her eye but she didn’t even try to! she was completely mesmerized by your toned body, sculpted to perfection by nobody but yourself… yujin could swear she was drooling as her eyes locked onto your abs, so inviting…
if she had a dick, she would definitely be hard.
you were wearing a simple crop top with sweatpants and a jacket but god, yujin has never seen a finer woman in her whole twenty years of living. the headphones around your neck wasn’t helping either — you were by far the most attractive girl in town, and yujin has seen a lot of pretty girls!
yujin didn’t know you. she was pretty sure this was the first time she has ever seen you, but oh god that thoughts that ran through her mind… surely you would run away from her if she let you hear about them. she couldn’t stop looking at your face, her pussy clenching at the way you bit your lip and swiped your tongue across them. a part yujin wanted to approach you right now, but you looked like you were tending to something important on your phone. what would she even say? right now, yujin just had this raging urge to bend you over the bench you were sitting on and make you scream her name until it was the only thing you could say—
suddenly, you got up from your seat, slinging your gym bag over your shoulder and smiled. at yujin. pause. oh good god, you were looking at her.
“see you later.” you said before swiftly turning on your heel and exiting the changing room, bidding goodbye to everyone else as well. yujin was blushing so hard. she had to keep herself from running and jumping around the changing rooms. did you have to sound so cute too?! yujin swore she almost chased after you and asked for your number, but she knew she would have looked stupid.
“why do you look like you’re about to explode?” yujin’s friend, gaeul, has finally entered the changing rooms with another friend in tow, jiwon.
yujin bites her lip, “hottest girl in town told me that she will ‘see me later’.” she was giggling, earning a few strange looks from the other girls in the room.
“that’s weird. i haven’t said anything to you yet.” wonyoung, who has apparently been in the room this entire time, says while filing her already-perfect nails.
yujin rolled her eyes at her friend before taking her hand and pulling her up from her seat, patting her ass, “let’s workout!”
it should be noted that you were in yujin’s head the entire day. she couldn’t do her routine properly because she was imagining your pretty face in between her legs… she almost fell off the treadmill for that exact reason. gaeul scolded her for nearly dropping a dumbbell on her own feet, because yujin had been busy drooling while remembering how your ass looked like it would be perfect to have in her hands. needless to say, yujin was very infatuated. there weren’t enough words in the world to express just how much she wanted you!
yujin was thinking about you even after she left the gym. she was thinking about you while she was walking her dog, while she was cooking dinner, while she was eating said dinner, while she was in her bathtub, while she was watching a cool new movie on netflix, and then… while she was trying to fall asleep. actually, she was just laying down on her bed, staring at the ceiling. and then, she slid her hand inside her pants, and started rubbing her pussy at the thought of you. it was actually unbelievable how a stranger she only saw for less than five minutes could have this much of an effect on her.
yujin fingered herself like she had never done before—playing with her clit with her own thumb, moaning so loud, bucking her hips into her own hand… hugging her pillow tightly to muffle her moans at least a little bit. but she kept going, she couldn’t stop. yujin made a mental note to approach you as soon as she sees you. and fuck, she was going to make sure that the next time she goes to the gym, she was going to get laid.
then, lo and behold, yujin’s wishes came true when she spotted you entering the gym as she was parking her car. gosh, your ass looked so good in those leggings. yujin couldn’t wait to just put her hands on you and give you the best fuck of your life. and yes, she was confident because she had quite the reputation in this gym, in this town. yujin was not only good at sex, she was fucking amazing. and she had no doubts that she would have you begging for her to make you come again by the end of this entire thing.
but first, yujin has to find a way to approach you without coming on too strong. that might have worked to the other girls she has hooked up with in this gym, mostly because they were just as much of a whore as yujin was, but she had a feeling that you were a girl with some sense of class. as much as yujin hated taking things slow especially when all she really wanted was to fuck, the idea of getting you to submit to her after she was done being all romantic sounded very enticing.
yujin watched as you talked to the male receptionist behind the counter. he was blushing, he was stuttering, and yujin figured that he must have been a part-timer because he looked young and hormonal. yujin grimaced as the boy tripped over his words and bit his tongue a few times as you made small talk with him. the slightly older other receptionist stared as the young boy sweats profusely at your presence—you had that effect on everybody, apparently. yujin crosses her arms, not at all a fan of the way the boy’s eyes lingered on your ass as you turned to enter the gym.
gross.
granted, yujin has done the same and has thought worse things about you but see, it was way different!
yujin trailed behind you as the two of you both made your way towards the locker room. everybody was staring at you, and then at yujin. a few girls waved at her, but she couldn’t keep her eyes off of you, except for the times when she would side eye a few men that looked at you in a way she didn’t like. god, yujin just had this urge to grab you right there and bend you over a barbell bench and show everyone that nobody will be able to make you feel as good as she can.
upon entering the locker room, yujin makes eye contact with wonyoung, who has once again somehow managed to arrive earlier than everyone else. and it seems like she had brought jiwon along with her. there were definitely doing something they shouldn’t have been doing together considering the way they jolted away from each other like they were shocked when yujin, as well as yourself, entered the room. you smiled and greeted the two girls before opening up your usual locker.
yujin’s eyes flicker over to your ass before she busies herself with her bag. of course, wonyoung and jiwon notice this and they approach her about it!
“real subtle, unnie.” wonyoung whispered, a smirk dancing on her lips as she watched yujin roll her eyes.
“we were calling you last night, you know,” jiwon said. “wonyoung and i went out for a little midnight mcdonald’s run and we were going to ask if you wanted anything but you must’ve gone to sleep early.”
yujin chuckled, “oh, i was awake. but my phone was on silent.” she bites her lip, remembering all of the nasty things she thought about you when she touched herself last night. having known yujin since they were little children, wonyoung had this special and amazing ability to be somehow in sync with her mind, figuratively of course, so she immediately knew what yujin had meant by that. the older girl spent the entire day ogling at you after all, what else could she have done when she got home?
“huh… were you busy?” jiwon asked, scratching her head.
wonyoung pats her friend’s back and sighed, “i think it’s best that you don’t know, jiwonie.”
“saying that as if i didn’t just catch the two of you on the verge of pouncing on each other.” yujin bites back, and judging by the way, jiwon’s face flushed and her eyes started darting everywhere, her suspicions were right!
a locker closes, making the girls turn their head towards your direction. you give them a brief smile before exiting the room, humming to a beat and all. wonyoung herself couldn’t help but whistle at the sight of your perfect ass, thank goodness you were wearing your headphones as you left, or else yujin would’ve had to smack her friend upside in the head. even jiwon was seemingly mesmerized by your amazing body—yujin knew she wasn’t alone in all of this!
“i’m going to fuck her.” yujin said. wonyoung looked unfazed by her proposal, meanwhile jiwon’s face had warmed up at the thought. jiwon had known about yujin’s awful habit of fucking every girl she encounters anywhere, especially in the gym, but she hadn’t seen her in action just yet! she has only heard stories from wonyoung and gaeul—stories that made her want to shrink onto herself because of how flustered she got from the things yujin has done.
“she looks like a challenge, unnie. good luck.” wonyoung said, patting the older girl’s arm before taking jiwon’s hand and leaving the locker room.
a challenge, they say? well! if yujin was good at anything, other than fucking, it was having more guts than anyone and taking a leap of faith. she knew she was hot, she knew she was pretty, and she most definitely knew you were gay as hell—she can do anything! with a huff and an encouraging enough pat on the back (given by herself, yes), yujin leaves the changing rooms with a smile on her face, thinking up of a plan to approach you and to slowly make you submit to her. jiwon and wonyoung were occupying some treadmills, chatting amongst each other. maybe even flirting! neither of them have been slick after all.
yujin spots you only a few steps away from wonyoung and jiwon. you were also on a treadmill, walking at a steady pace and eyes glued towards the small screen that played your favorite television show from the early 2010’s. yujin tilts her head, smiling at the way you were so focused on the show that you nearly tripped. you were quick to catch yourself and keep on walking like nothing happened though, to which yujin chuckled lightly before someone—a man!—tapped you on the shoulder and caught your attention. the man was only asking if you were okay but nobody could blame yujin for seeing red because he was not making his interest in your tits subtle at all!
god, if yujin could make that man explode with her mind, she totally would.
“oh, i know that look,” gaeul, who just arrived inside the facility, said with a smirk. she lifted her sunglasses up and wriggled her eyebrows towards yujin. “what’s the plan?” she asked, nudging her friend with her elbow.
“it doesn’t involve you, unnie.” yujin replied. gaeul waved at wonyoung and jiwon before patting yujin’s bum and walking away with a wink. the younger girl sighed and looked at you again. thankfully enough, the man has left you all alone and you were once again focused on your television show. yujin scans the entire room—nearly everybody looks at your direction every now and then. eyes raking all over your body, captivated by your beauty the same way yujin was when she first saw you. all of these people wanted you, but yujin was going to make sure that she was the only one out of all of them that will have you.
see, not a lot of people approached you. and you didn’t know whether it was because you looked intimidating or if you gave off some sort of bad vibes, but a lot of the folks that frequent the gym just don’t seem to be very fond of talking to you, which explains the countless times you have tried chatting with someone and they suddenly start acting like they didn’t know how to hold a conversation. you grew fond of the people that did try to interact with you, but immediately lost affection for them the moment you figured out that all they wanted was your body.
as in, they wanted to fuck you.
like this girl. ahn yujin, she introduced herself. or was that her name? you couldn’t really remember. you logged out of the conversation when you took notice of the way her eyes could not at all stop roaming all over your body. see, if it were anyone else, you would have smiled and made up some sort of excuse to walk away from them, but something about this girl made you stand idly by the stepmill and listen to her. maybe it was the dimples, the frequent lip-licking, the attractive sounds of her laughs, the eye-smile, but god, you absolutely just went dumb for this girl.
what were the two of you even talking about? you had no idea. all you were thinking about was the many times you’ve seen this gorgeous girl before but never once thought to talk to her. in your head, you thought she would have acted like everyone else did but if you knew that she had this much interest in you then you would have entertained her much, much earlier.
while yujin talked, you let your eyes not-so-discreetly wander. she was taller than you, and no doubt stronger than you by the way her arms were built. you couldn’t look away from her abs, which was weird considering you had some of your own and yet, it was hers you were currently obsessing over. jesus christ, she was so hot. and so fucking charming! as much as you were aware of her not-very-subtle pick-up technique, you couldn’t stop yourself from falling for it. she giggled every second, winked every now and then, and you blushed at every single action.
you probably looked like an awestruck dumbass to everyone else right now. but the men around could use this wake-up call. you were only interested in women. tall, tan, and ridiculously handsome women who had ways to talk themselves into a girl’s pants.
“do you think you could give me some pointers, unnie?” yujin smiles sweetly, tilting her head and showing off those cute dimples.
you blinked, realizing that you did not hear a single word of what she said at all. “s-sure! sure, i could. of course.” you answered, clearing your throat right after. yujin eyes shined with pure excitement and you found it so adorable that you couldn’t help but smile brightly at her. you knew damn well that she was spitting bullshit but listen, you were a simple woman!
pretty girl. have to kiss. maybe even fuck—
“so, how do i use this thing?” yujin pats the stepmill, looking at it curiously. you were so sure that you saw her using this exact machine some days ago. regardless, you taught her how to use the machine, talking on and on about specific things. you thought that yujin would get bored of you rambling about a stupid gym equipment but when you looked at her, she was intently staring, absorbing each and every word you were saying. and it was this moment when you thought that maybe she isn’t all bad!
(“she has to be joking right now,” wonyoung said as she stared incredulously at you and yujin. “is she seriously expecting a girl that hot and smart to fall for her usual antics?”
“yeah. i mean, she is yujin.” gaeul replied, smiling proudly when yujin asking the dumbest question actually got you to look at and talk to her.
“i’m not sure if the stupidity is an act anymore…” wonyoung sighed, shaking her head. jiwon was happy for yujin, actually! she was smiling as she watched you and her interact. sure, it was dumb but yujin surely did have her ways. maybe jiwon should write down some notes…)
you and yujin proceeded to chat about your workout routine as she busied herself with the stepmill. you told her everything—your warm-ups, your more intense workouts, the exercises you do when you can’t make it to the gym, your diet—and yujin never failed to listen. your heart warmed up at the gesture. nobody really listens to you ramble on for that long about that part of your life without dismissing you or switching to another topic entirely. you decided that you liked yujin! she seemed like a nice enough girl, and she was very, very pleasing to look at too.
it felt good to have a friend who would listen to your nonsense like this. well, she wasn’t really a friend yet. of course not. you weren’t stupid—you just met! but perhaps the lust you noticed in her eyes before was all in your imagination. just because everyone in the gym viewed you as some prize to be won didn’t mean she thought that too. or that was what you hoped, at least.
(you are so goddamn naive.)
“ah, sorry. i have to take this call.” you excused yourself out of the conversation and went to some corner to answer a call from one of your friends.
(back on the stepmill, yujin shoots a look towards wonyoung, gaeul, and jiwon, winking at them and shaking her shoulders in celebration. gaeul claps silently wearing a proud grin and all, jiwon shoots her two thumbs ups, while wonyoung rolled her eyes in annoyance. no doubt yujin was going to be annoying about her stupid plan working. in response to wonyoung’s attitude, yujin gives her a kiss in the air, making the younger girl grimace and look away.
“so bitter. all she has to do pay me is twenty bucks, geez.” yujin muttered under her breath.)
after a few minutes or so, you came back to yujin who was now off the stepmill, thinking that she had had enough of the machine for the day. “thanks a lot for the tips, unnie. i think i should know what to do with my time here now.” yujin says. again, you knew she had a routine of her own—and a pretty complicated one at that! so you didn’t know what exactly she was thanking you for.
nevertheless, you shot her a smile back. “no worries, yujin-ah.”
yujin couldn’t help but blush, but she was quick to cover up her bashfulness with a bold statement. bold in your standards anyway. “you’re sweet, unnie. could i have your number?” bold, because nobody in this damn place never knew how to hold a conversation with you, let alone work up the courage to ask for your number after only a solid few minutes of useless talking!
“it’s not everyday you meet decent people at the gym, you know?” yujin steps forward, tilting her head and blinking at you innocently. “maybe we can even hang out somewhere else! i think you’re great, unnie.” she says, a sheepish smile gracing her features. oh, she really has charmed you. because before you knew it, you had her phone in your hands and you were typing down your number on it. she probably meant it as friends, right? right? yeah, probably.
“thank you.” yujin says when you return her phone to her. she stares at her screen for a bit, pretty eyes fluttering back up to glance at you for a second, before she starts typing. no doubt to send you a quick message so you could save her number on your phone. you felt your device vibrate in your pocket but you don’t bother to pull it out.
“oh, are you leaving early today, unnie?” yujin asks as you pick your water bottle up from the ground. you noticed the pout on her lips when you stood back up, and it made you smile a little.
you nodded, “yeah. i made some plans with a friend today, that ought to be fun.”
“aw. i guess i’ll just see you tomorrow, then?” yujin truly did sound disappointed. you almost wanted to ditch whatever plans you had, but you weren’t that kind of friend. you would never cancel plans just to spend time with some stranger from the gym! (you weren’t that kind of friend, yet.)
“mhm. i’m always here anyway. either to do some work or to just visit. some of the staff are my friends,” you grinned and waved at the cute female employee in the distance. yewon, as her name tag showed, waved back at you before doing whatever chore she was doing. “it was nice meeting you, yujin-ah.” you pat the girl’s arm before walking past her and approaching yewon, who took out one of her earbuds and started chatting with you.
however, during the entire time you were chatting with yewon about your plans (the very same plans she was to join later), your eyes couldn’t help but wander. away from your friend and towards the direction of one ahn yujin, who was now busy talking and laughing with her own friends. it seems like she couldn’t help herself from looking at you too. the two of you shared glances and small smiles as you talked with your respective friends. of course yewon wasn’t stupid, she noticed how your eyes never focused on her.
“what happened to never making friends with the people in the gym, (y/n)?” she asked, crossing her arms. “or will she become something more, i wonder?” yewon teased, nudging your arm and everything while wearing a smirk on her cute face.
you blinked innocently at your friend. “what do you mean?” you knew damn well what she meant! a girl as pretty as yujin staying solely as friends with you? why, that was akin to saying that hell would eventually freeze over! yewon rolls her eyes at you and walked away, saying something about doing her job and updating you of her plans later. when she left you on your lonesome, you started walking back to the changing rooms.
and of course, you spared one last glance at yujin. and it turns out that she had been looking at you the entire time.
she smiles, you do the same. and despite your resistance, your heart skips a beat.
something more, yewon said! well, after seeing those abs and dimples up close, you sure hope so.
you ended up taking a shower in the changing rooms with a bright smile on your face, thrilled for the new and exciting adventure you might have with your new ‘friend’.
for the past few days, everything you have been doing, you’ve been doing it with yujin. but in the gym, of course. you’ve told her about your usual routine so she started following it, you take breaks from workouts together, and you talk a lot in the changing rooms before and after working out! you even got to know yujin’s friends a bit as well! other than yujin herself, jiwon might be your favorite in the little group as you often find yourself smiling and waving at her whenever you see her. but you’ve tried toning the smiles down a bit after wonyoung sent a glare your way one time. but yujin reassured you that wonyoung doesn’t hold any negative feelings about you—she was just naturally overprotective of jiwon considering wonyoung has been crushing on her for the longest time.
anyway, yujin’s friends were lovely. yujin herself was lovely. you were glad to be friends with her.
in fact, you’ve become so close that you eventually wanted to hang out with her outside of the gym! fortunately enough, yujin liked you to the point where she agreed to do whatever you want! from brunches, to visiting exhibits and aquariums, going to concerts—everything! yujin quickly became one of your best friends, but one could say that the two of you are too close. or at least that was what umji told you.
“just be careful, (y/n). people you meet in the gym have a track record of being, well, not very good!”
she was referring to your exes, but it wasn’t like you were planning on dating yujin! nor were you planning on liking her like that. ahn yujin was simply your friend. your criminally attractive friend who makes shameless comments about how hot she finds you and always seems to have her hands on you. like now, at this present time, she has an arm around your shoulders as the two of you watched a cartoon that only aired early in the mornings on your living room couch.
the two of you have become comfortable enough to be affectionate like this but recently, you’ve noticed that there’s been something in the air. and you weren’t stupid. you knew all about sexual tension but this one was simply ridiculous—it was off the charts! in your head, you blamed yujin for being so unfairly hot and charming. every cheeky grin, smirk, and wink sent your mind into a frenzy and before you knew it, she was all you thought about as you lay in your bed at night!
“the girls and i are planning on going to that fair later in the week. will you and umji-unnie be there?” yujin asked, shiny eyes landing right on yours. she realizes that you’ve been staring at her and laughed lightly, but chose not to address it since you’ve looked away with your cheeks burning. it was a normal occurrence at this point. it happens to yujin sometimes too but instead of getting caught staring at your face, it was your ass. or boobs depending on which private part of yours she chooses to drool over for the day. you try to tease her about it when you do catch her but yujin always finds a way to smooth-talk her way out of scrutiny.
damn her and wits.
“i think so. umji’s girlfriend has been waiting for that fair since she missed it last year so umji is legally obligated to go. and that automatically means that i’m tagging along.” you pulled out your phone from your sweater pocket and looked at the time. 8:43. you and yujin were going to drive to the gym soon.
“you’d willingly third-wheel? god, i refuse to be around jiwon and wonyoung unless gaeul-unnie was with me. they aren’t dating but they sure can be some saps.” yujin sighs, playfully rolling her eyes at the memory of her two best friends always playing push-and-pull with their feelings for each other.
“i won’t be third-wheeling if we just leave the lovebirds and go on our own adventure,” you tried to sound nonchalant about the whole thing as much as you could but if yujin was able to see through you, you wouldn’t be surprised. “with gaeul too.”
“nah, forget about unnie. i bet she’d love to be alone. she’s kind of weird sometimes,” yujin smiles at you. that same charming smile she always shot your way since the day she approached you. so handsome. “we should definitely just go together.” you didn’t get to say anything else because an alarm in your phone went off and yujin stood up. if you give in to your delusions enough, you could see that yujin was smiling a little bit because of your statement.
you turned off your tv and followed yujin to the door, where she was putting her shoes on and swiping her keys from some hooks on the wall. now you finally have use for that thing. after you’ve grabbed your bag, yujin opens the door for you and you walk out, relishing in the feeling of the chill morning air kissing your skin as you walk down the steps of your front porch. yujin locks your door and tosses the key over to you, and you catch it effortlessly, to which she whistles at. apparently, that was attractive.
yujin was to drive both of you to the gym today. it was a thing she always did on wednesdays. you don’t know why wednesdays specifically but they happen to be your lazy days so you were thankful for the sentiment. you settled yourself in the passenger seat and managed to snatch the bluetooth connection before yujin did, sticking your tongue out at her when you did and earning an eye roll.
when yujin pulled out of your driveway, you were so sure that it was just going to be another day with her. but you should’ve known otherwise when she put her hand on your thigh and caressed your skin with her thumb as she drove down the road with a small smile on her lips.
at that time, you didn’t know yet but yujin was going to make your week significantly better!
you started your usual routine when the two of you arrived in the gym: make small talk with the receptionists and umji, greet everybody around, head into the locker rooms to change into your usual workout attire, and start your day! and see, for the most part, the usual was what happened, you know? you and yujin did the same exact workouts, never left each other’s side as well as sights—even when yujin’s friends arrived the two of you were attached by the hip! gaeul had been smiling strangely at you the entire time she talked with you for a bit, so that made you believe yujin’s statement about gaeul being weird at times. and from behind gaeul, jiwon and wonyoung were up to their usual will-they, won’t-they antics. totally normal.
it wasn’t until some guy somehow gathered the courage to strike up a conversation with you when things took a weird turn.
you knew your way around men in the gym but for the first time, none of your evasive maneuvers were working. laughing and smiling did you not work, you actually had to say more than a few words to the guy. excusing yourself out of the conversion did not work because when you came back from whatever lie you told, the guy talked to you again! not finding it in you to avoid him any longer, you opted to stand there and listen to him go on and on about his adventures in this gym. of course, you had to share your stories too and you know what, you were actually starting to get interested in the topic.
the guy seemed genuine enough. no ulterior motives whatsoever. all smiles and eyes focused on yours the entire ti—did he just touch your waist?
ah, it was too good to be true. you should’ve known men were never going to be normal about you!
yujin apparently did, however, because the moment she saw you freeze up, she bolted to where you were standing and swatted the man’s hand away from you.
“whoa, easy. i was just—”
“just being a massive pervert. i know. screw off, fucker.”
yujin doesn’t even wait until the guy walks off to drag you somewhere far away from him. she glares at anybody who stared at the scene and stopped walking when the two of you reached the stepmills. she was fuming—eyebrows furrowed deeply, her normally soft brown eyes looked at you harshly. a heavy sigh escaped her lips and she turned her head away. it wasn’t until you tilted your head to look at her that she finally calmed down. from the distance, you could see her friends staring. wonyoung was seemingly surprised at what went down, jiwon was clearly concerned for you, and gaeul looked like she was already planning on poking holes at the guy’s tires as soon as she could.
yujin huffs, pouting at you. “that’s why you should stop entertaining the people here, unnie.”
“i entertained you. look where that got me.” you said with a smile. and well, yujin was smarter than she looked! she knew exactly what you meant; how you were aware of her intentions then and now. suddenly, her mouth was clamped shut. she looked guilty, almost ashamed. but she doesn’t say anything after that, merely muttering about punching that guy before continuing on with her routine. you don’t know why, but it was awkward after that. yujin couldn’t seem to bring herself to look at you but when she did, you could feel it. you always get chills, the good kind, whenever she stares at you so you just knew.
eventually, you wanted a break. so you briefly stepped outside for some fresh air. the breeze felt cool against your damp skin. you stretched out your sore legs and arms, you were surprisingly already tired despite having only been working out for a short while. clear proof that talking and being around men was an energy-drainer. maybe you should really take a page out of yujin’s book and pretend that they don’t exist entirely. speaking of yujin, you wondered if yoju actually hurt her in some way. it’s not like you were condemning her for having ulterior motives when she first talked to you, you did feel and were thinking the same things for her back then. so in conclusion, both of you were perverts.
“unnie.”
a blueberry yogurt juice box, your favorite among the variety of flavors they offer in the gym vending machines, enters your vision. you turned your head and there yujin was with a bashful look on her face.
“that really bummed me out. we should just call it a day.” she says, pouting. you accepted the juice box, chuckling slightly at her for being so cute.
now, you don’t know what came over you but at that moment, yujin looked so damn delicious with her protruding muscles, her bangs sticking to her forehead, and droplets of sweat running down her neck that you couldn’t help but be brave. you stood closer to her, one would say almost too close, and tilted your head, eyes flickering down to her inviting lips. “should we hit the showers then, yujin-ah?” you asked and god, you were practically eyefucking her.
yujin doesn’t seem fazed by your sudden confidence at all. she merely takes a cautious sideways glance before leaning close to your ear, lips dangerously close to your neck, making you shiver. “i was wondering when you were going to let me fuck you, unnie.” she whispered, smirking because she knew just how you were feeling considering you slightly pushed her away and covered your face with the juice box she gave you. she was too darn handsome. it was bold of you to think that you could make her feel flustered when she basically knows what always works with girls.
you take yujin’s wrist with your hand and she allows you to drag her back inside the gym. you avoided stopping for small talk. actually, you avoided looking at anybody else entirely! and as soon as the doors to the changing rooms closed, yujin’s hands were all over you. you grabbed her shirt, pulling it over her head before you kissed her. she presses your back against the cool metal lockers, making you whimper and giving her the perfect opportunity to insert her tongue inside your mouth. she unzips your thin jacket and pulls up your top along with your bra, her hands immediately getting busy with your breasts.
you bucked your hips against her pelvis desperately, but yujin ignored you. opting to break the kiss and take one of your nipples inside her mouth instead, running her tongue over the hard bud and sucking on it while pinching and squeezing the other one. but it doesn’t take long for her other hand to slowly make its descent down your body, feeling your stomach a bit, before slipping inside your leggings, teasing your sensitive clit through the fabric of your panties.
“mhmn… yujin.. more.”
that was all yujin needed before she stripped you down to only your panties. she takes a minute to observe your body, eyes shining with pure lust as well as appreciation before tugging you towards the showers. fortunately enough, it was empty so yujin took you to the nearest stall and didn't waste any time before pinning you against the door and kissing you again. you pulled off her ponytail and threw it away to some unknown corner, letting her gorgeous hair cascade down to her shoulders. you cupped her cheeks with your hands, pulling away slightly and pecking her lips softly, earning a giggle from her.
you pecked her lips again, and again, and every time, she would smile. yujin kissed you again, she was more gentle and careful this time… until she nearly ripped your panties when she pulled it off of you. “get in, unnie.” yujin said, giving you a kiss on your cheek and a pat on your ass before nodding her head towards the shower. yujin starts stripping herself down while you turn the faucet on, sighing contentedly as the cool water meets your skin. goosebumps grow all over your skin, but were completely erased when you felt strong arms wrap around your body.
yujin was warm. from the way she smiled at you, talked to you, treated you, kissed you, and now, the way she held you. her hands explored your body as she softly kissed your neck, “have i told you how perfect i find you, unnie?” yujin runs a hand across your breasts, glides it down to your stomach and all the way down to your inner thighs before making its way around your thighs and back up your waist.
“you’re kind, you’re sweet… you’re exactly the type of person people would wanna bring home to their parents,” yujin turns you around, moving your wet hair behind your back and smiling at you when you cupped her cheeks again. you pull her closer, hungry for her lips. it was as if all you wanted to do was kissing her until you were sick of it—as if you would get sick of it though. “and fuck, you’re so hot.” yujin bites her lip before finally giving you what you had been craving for. this kiss had the equal amount of tenderness and passion, both immediately getting taken over by pure desire when yujin’s lips start leaving a trail of kisses down your jawline to your neck.
warmth blooms across your chest as yujin takes her time leaving carefully-placed marks all over your skin. sucking and licking wherever she felt was perfect until she eventually leaned back to stare at her work, “beautiful.” and she continues to use her lips as she lowered herself to the ground, leaving a few hickeys on your chest, your breasts, your stomach, and finally, your thighs.
“open up for me, unnie. i want to see you.” and so you do.
yujin licks her lips before kissing up to your inner thighs. you couldn’t help but put a hand on her head, staring down at her with pleading eyes, desperate for her to just get it over with and make you see the stars. you were lucky enough that yujin couldn’t find it in herself to tease you. surely after months of wooing you and playing with your head she would be exhausted from all the games, and thankfully she was! yujin leans in and gives your pussy one long lick, making you whimper and grip her hair just a little bit tighter. you could see her smile at you before she proceeds on eating you out.
clearly, this wasn’t yujin’s first time. maybe on her knees, yes. she, as well as her friends, have told you countless stories of how addicted she really was to eating pussy and you could see it clearly here. yujin, with her eyebrows furrowed in concentration and eyes shut tight while she makes a mess of her pretty face by slobbering all over your cunt. like a fucking dog. you pull and tug at her hair, unable to do anything else due to the amount of delight hindered your ability to think.
“mhm.. ha.. unnie’s pussy is so—ah, delicious.. i knew it.” yujin opens her eyes just to see the look on your face. all flustered and contorted with pleasure. you covered your mouth with your other hand just to make sure that you aren’t too loud. yujin didn’t like that, apparently. she sneaks one of her hands in between your thighs and leans back a little, licking your wetness off her mouth before shoving two fingers inside your cunt. you choked out a moan and you couldn’t even say anything to yujin about it all because she immediately wraps her lips around your sensitive clit.
“ahh..! y-yujin!” again, you clamped your mouth shut, opting to muffle them at the very least! the younger girl’s mouth and fingers surprisingly well together—yujin’s digits hitting all the right spots inside your walls while she flicks, sucks, and nibbles on your clit. having no choice but to uncover your mouth and put both your hands on yujin’s head, pushing her in further and practically grinding your hips on her face.
“please, please, baby.. keep going…! m-more..” you were desperate for release. yujin could see that much. she stares and stares while she eats you out, so fucking turned out with the way you were begging for her—almost screaming for her despite what may come after.
(this was exactly what yujin wanted from day one. to have you screaming her name where everybody else can hear you just to prove that nobody, no other man and even woman, can make you feel as good as she can. now she’ll prove just how much she can make you feel. something beyond pleasure that only she can give you.)
“mmphf…! fuck, more… more, baby..!” and so yujin increases her pace, pulling her fingers out all the way and almost painfully plunging it back deep inside you. now you were screaming, having lost control of your composure long after yujin flicks your bud with her tongue and sucks on it desperately. you were pretty sure that you were hurting her with the way you gripped her hair tightly, but you knew that if you let go, you would fall over. your knees have turned to jelly, and it was only yujin’s body that kept you standing up.
“come all over my face, unnie…” yujin says. she takes out her fingers and replaces it with her tongue, once again making you moan loudly while she relishes in the taste of your cunt. fuck, yujin was so in love with how sweet you were, just the perfect flavor to satisfy her mouth. yujin makes out with your cunt, occasionally running her tongue over your clit and dipping it inside your hole, moaning as she did so. god, she could literally come just by eating you out alone. yujin has never been this addicted—you could probably pee on her and she’d drink it up! and she really would.
it takes another flick of yujin’s tongue on your clit before the pressure in your lower stomach finally breaks. yujin held your thighs tightly as you came, lapping up your cum diligently while she held you up. you grind your cunt against her mouth, still desperate to feel her mouth on your even though you were in the middle of your climax. yujin herself could not help but start licking again, her mind completely clouded with desire. now the only thing she wanted to do was make you come over and over again until both of you were exhausted out of your minds.
she wanted to see you lose every bit of control in your mind for her, and only her. and yujin plans on doing that very same thing today. right now.
much to your dismay, yujin pulls away from your cunt, not before giving your clit a sweet little kiss, and slowly stands up. she was only the slightest bit taller than you, but her dark eyes, alluring lips, and all the little droplets of water that ran down her toned body, you couldn’t help but go a little crazy over it all. yujin pulls you in, wrapping her lips around yours and immediately sliding her tongue inside your mouth, letting you taste a little bit of yourself before she presses your back against the wall.
while kissing you, yujin sneaks a hand in between your legs and starts massaging your clit in circles, relishing in the sounds of your muffled moans. you started moving your hips, grinding slowly on her hand. putting a hand behind your thigh, yujin pulls your leg up, wrapping it around her hips. she starts teasing your entrance, only running her fingertips over it rather than doing what you clearly wanted her to do. you whine in her mouth, detaching your lips from hers and looking at her with pleading eyes, “please, yujin. i need you.”
and how could she say no to you? yes, yujin would love to have you beg and beg for her but that was an experiment for later. right now, she wants to ruin you and have every damn person in this place know that the only girl that can take you to the stars is her.
yujin plunges two long fingers knuckle deep inside your pussy. she moans at your warmth, finding the way your tight cunt sucked her fingers in so attractive. pulling in and out excruciatingly slowly just to feel your cunt clench around her digits and soak them with your slick. “fuck, unnie… how are you so tight?” yujin chuckles. her eyes shined with hunger as she watched her fingers disappear inside of you.
“don’t tell me you’re a virgin… i’ll really ruin you if that’s the case—fuck.” yujin curls her fingers inside you, making you release a whiny moan before you cover your mouth shut. your face flushed while yujin laughed at you. you clawed at her back while she spread her fingers inside you before pushing them in even deeper. you didn’t even know if that was possible. she starts hitting the spots not even your toys are capable of reaching, her pace and force now increasing at an alarming rate, making you unable to say anything but nonsense.
you never really told yujin about your adventures in bed with other people. you weren’t a virgin of course, but what she didn’t know was that… you weren’t used to this. you knew a thing or two about being the one that’s doing the fucking, not the other way around! you somehow always had ways to be on top of the people you hook up with but the idea of letting yujin make you feel real pleasure was too enticing to give it up.
(oh, you have no idea how that information might’ve rewired yujin’s brain entirely. her obsession towards you slowly grew day by day—imagine what would have happened in here had you made her aware of that fact? she would make sure that you couldn’t walk.)
you hugged yuin by her neck tightly, hiding your face on her shoulder. a string of incoherent words leave your mouth as she steadily fucked you. it was reaching to a point where it almost hurt, but you buck your hips to her rhythm anyway, never having enough. yujin grabs your waist with her free arm, “up.” she said, tapping at your lower back. yujin momentarily pulls out of your cunt to wrap both of your legs around her waist, carrying you while still having you back up against the wall.
this time around, yujin doesn’t ease you into taking her fingers. as soon as you were comfortable, she shoves her two fingers right back inside of you and fucks your cunt relentlessly. she merely watched your face while she fucked you, grinning sickly at the way you threw your head back and gave her a full view of the mess she made on your neck.
you were so beautiful like this—the perfect little piece of art that yujin can ruin as she pleases.
“nnngh… god, yujin—ah!” you dug your nails on her shoulders, leaning forward and pressing your forehead against hers.
“mhm, unnie’s such a good girl. it’s overwhelming isn’t it?” yujin whispers, tilting her head and leaving a quick kiss on your lips. “but you’re still taking it so well… fuck.” yujin increases her pace yet again, now fucking your cunt like it was some toy. you hug her tightly, screaming and whining at the amount of pleasure that took over your senses. it was so hard to comprehend it all, and now you believe all of the ridiculous stories her friends told you about her hookups. the thing that ahn yujin does best is sex, and good god was she fucking you stupid.
“y-yyujin… yujin…! yujin, i’m—mmgn…!”
“uh-huh. you’re coming, unnie? i got you. come. come.”
but she doesn’t let you. not immediately. yujin catches one of your nipples with her lips, sucking on it while she simultaneously fucked your cunt. she slows down her pace just by a bit, focusing her attention on your nipple just to truly make you lose your head when she thrusts inside you again. it all felt too much eventually. her fingers, her lips, her tongue, and all the things she made you feel.
“ahh..! ah—yujin-ah, yujin..!” and then the knot in your stomach breaks for the second time today, your cum spilling all over yujin’s stomach. she shushes you as you come, kissing your shoulder softly and pulls her hand out of your pussy just to hug you tightly, caressing your back while you come down from your high. your head collapsed on top of her shoulder, and a few tears squeezed out of your eyes due to the slight pain that you felt in your groin. no doubt you couldn’t walk correctly after this. you just hoped that you could look everyone in the eye like nothing happened. not that you’d want to hide this from them anyway—yujin made you feel too good. that was something to boast about!
eventually, your breathing reverted back to normal and you lifted your head up.
“you okay?” yujin asked. she smiles as you hold her face in your hands, admiring every single one of her features for a good minute before pulling her in for a sweet kiss. your feet were back on the ground again, but you leaned on yujin’s body for support while the two of you made out under the cold water. only your soft moans, hushed whispers, little giggles, and the smacks of your lips being heard other than the running water.
“you’re not going to ignore me after this, right?” you asked after pulling away.
yujin looked at you incredulously, “unnie… i have a crush on you. why would i do that?” she said, pouting. adorable, but you still had doubts in your head considering her reputation! “especially now that i know how good your pussy tastes.” she joked, licking her lips.
you pushed her away with a smile, “perv.”
you weren’t able to get far before yujin pulled you in again, kissing you and laughing as she did so, making your heart jump several beats as it always does whenever she’s around.
of course, this was just another example of the local gym’s infamous ‘bimbo’ womanizer ahn yujin getting whatever she wants. except this time, she gets something more, something better and something real.
#ive smut#ive x reader#ive imagines#ive x fem reader#girl group smut#girl group x reader#girl group imagines#girl group x fem reader#ahn yujin smut#ahn yujin x fem reader#ahn yujin imagines#ahn yujin x reader#yujin smut#yujin imagines#yujin x fem reader#yujin x reader
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Your Flat
Pairing: Simon 'Ghost' Riley x Civilian!Reader
Scenario: It's date night and Simon invites himself over to your flat to pick you up and he finally sees that chaos that you're living in, along with your artwork.
Note: Set in 2014
Warnings: No mask Simon (It's my personal headcanon in his regular life he probably wouldn't wear it), teasing, smut, P in V, Simon being his usual guarded self, canon-typical swearing.
Friday night. It was date night – something one night that you had jokingly called it and now it had begrudgingly become part of his own vocabulary too. It was now the thing in the week that Simon was beginning to look forward to the most. There had been no conversation of commitment but Simon knew that he liked spending time with you. Actually, you were consuming his mind outside of spending date nights with you. Deep down a voice continued to tell him that this was all a bad idea and that your safety was being risked but that voice was beginning to become more and more quiet as each day passed.
This would be the first time that Simon would see your flat. It had been the only thing you had been fairly secretive about. Rapping his knuckles loudly against the door Simon smirked to himself as he heard a flurry of sound from behind it. It swung open swiftly and witnessed you rushing in the opposite direction down the hallway, minus a few items of clothes. “You’re early!” That had been intentional, otherwise you’d had met him in the carpark and he’d never been able to set foot in your flat. “Come in!” You coaxed from your bedroom.
Entering your flat Simon was instantly overwhelmed by the sheer chaos of the place. It was small but it was full of clutter and art supplies, they were littering almost every surface. There was laundry slung over every door and radiator, hanging off the backs of chairs and on hangers over doorways, interestingly every place but the airer designed for it which was instead housing some of your drying canvas’. “Jesus, kid…”
“I didn’t realise I’d have company!” You hollered from your bedroom, sounding breathless behind the door, bumping into objects and fussing over trying to find something appropriate to wear. "I'm sorry!" You tagged on quickly.
In your lounge area there was one particular space that caught his attention. There were stacks of canvas’ placed against one another, an old looking easel, rows of different paints and brushes. Oh, so this must have been where you created your artwork and those canvas’ must have been the finished pieces. Simon took great care as he stepped into that little shrine and began to inspect them. It wasn’t like he understood art anyway. Looking at some pieces made him feel certain ways. It was invoking emotions – wasn’t that what art was supposed to do? Fuck, he wasn’t some connoisseur but he could see that you were very talented. “Right, I’m-” Your flustered frame bound around the corner still mid putting your heel on and cutting you sentence short as you spotted Simon in your ‘art studio’. “Oh, you found my art…”
Simon was careful in returning the canvas’ how he had found them and turned to you. “It was about the only thing I could find in here…” There was a tell-tale look of embarrassment that flashed across your features as you rolled your eyes. “You are a messy pup…” He commented taking a few steps in your direction and quirking a brow down at you, as if waiting for some explanation.
“I-It isn’t usually this bad…” There was so much defensiveness to your tone, attempting to rack your brain for some reasonable excuse for your flat being in such a state. “I woke up and I had this massive spark that I just knew I needed to get onto canvas… right, I’m not making excuses…. God, I know I must sound so stupid…. I’m not making a whole lot of sense, but-” “Kid, enough.” His firm tone commanded, reaching up and tugging you gently in his direction. “Honestly, I couldn’t care less if your flat is messy…” You let out a relieved puff of air. “As long as mine doesn’t end up the same way, I’m fine with it.” A bright smile found your lips. “What time did you say our table is booked for?”
His eyes narrowed softly as he felt your dainty fingers dancing along his belt. “Babe…” It was a warning. “What?” There was such false innocence to your tone and that was what finally made him snap.
It seemed very clear that your IKEA bedframe wasn’t up to the task of being fucked on. It creaked and cracked dangerously with each thrust into your trembling frame, the headboard was clattering against the wall so much that Simon wondered if he should put a pillow behind it to try and save your poor neighbours ears. All this whilst you whine and whimpered beneath him, clearly unaware of all this commotion. It appeared that all that consumed your mind was the way he perfectly stretched your tight walls to accommodate his girthy cock.
With one particularly strong crack beneath him Simon grumbled out. “M’gonna break your fuckin’ bed…” It earned a fit of giggles from you that mixed with a soft load of whimpers. “Fuck off. I’m being serious.” Even he could fight the small smirk before finally deciding to save your poor bed anymore stress.
Instead, his arms wound around your frame. “Fuckin’… c’mere…” His cock still buried deep within your walls as he rose from the bed and placed you against the closest surface. There wasn’t any hesitation from there, Simon began to fuck into your wet cunt with reckless-abandon. This time he was far more confident that he would be able to do any structural damage to your home. There wasn’t any way that he’d be able to knock down a loadbearing wall from fucking alone. “My good girl~”
Rushing from your flat once they had cleaned up and resituated the majority of their clothes. You were speaking your worries about the possibility of missing the table whilst trying to work your key into the dodge lock barrel, it didn’t escape your knowledge your grumpy old neighbour Peter was lingering outside smoking over the balcony and observing the estate below him. “These flats have thin walls, you know…” He muttered lowly and Simon narrowed his eyes as you struggled with the lock, cursing softly under your breath.
“Bad enough I have to listen to that shit you call music, but now I have to listen to you fucking too-” “That’s enough.” Simon growled out at him causing Peter to look in his direction furious. By luck the key finally spun and you were quick to be by Simon’s side, taking his hand and beginning to drag him past Peter and away from the possibility of an altercation.
As you got further away from Peter, you finally decided you could laugh softly, looking at Simon and saying. “You don’t have to fight every prick that says something stupid to us…” Taking your hand he tugged you close and pressed a sweet kiss to your forehead. “How else are they gonna learn not to be disrespectful to you.” He watched the way that your eyes filled with such adoration. “Now get your arse moving before I end up fucking you in the stairwell just to prove a point to that twat…”
Masterlist | Ask | 05-09-2023
#simon riley x oc#simon riley x reader#ghost x oc#ghost x reader#simon ghost riley#simon ghost x reader#simon riley#simon riley x you#ghost cod#ghost mw2#simon riley imagine#simon ghost riley x reader#simon riley cod#simon riley x y/n#ghost#ghost x y/n#ghost x you#ghost smut#simon riley smut
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Hi, this is the first time I've asked anyone to write a smut fic or a smut headcanon with Keith and a very shy reader, I don't know if you do smut but if not you don't have to write. Or you can do about how Keith started the relationship with a very shy reader
Note: english is not my first language, so sorry if i wrote something wrong
i do write smut!! plus your english is very good dw about it!
i have two other fics on the way right now, but i'm gonna finish this one first because they're hcs and a lot more faster for me to write 😋 this is kinda hard cause i'm personally not very shy but i'll try my best! (think this turned out to be JUST nsfw hcs i swear)
this is afab reader!
idc if minors interact - nsfw under the cut
not proofread
SUPER brief hcs of how you got together (I WANT SMUT RN!!)
keith has always loved how shy you were, although he never said it out loud
you were almost always silent, behind everyone twiddling your thumbs or always finding something else in the room other than the people interesting
he found it endearing, although sometimes he knows he has to hold back his anger from you
every time he talked to you before you got together, you would blush uncontrollably and hesitate responding to him
so that's why it surprised him when you cornered him in a hallway, looking especially nervous
he saw a crumpled up note in your hands, and for the first time, you were holding eye contact with him
"i-uh, i like you a lot," you blurted out. you might be shy, but you were brave
immediately after that you shut your eyes, believing that he would reject you, or even worse, simply walk away
. . . but the kiss he gave you after was unmistakable.
nsfw hcs
you would always cover your face whenever it got too good, and keith would always pull you hands away, sometimes even pinning you wrists above your head with one hand
"i want to see you."
GRRABABARBKARBARK
definitely has the strength to overpower you, and if you love that you know what i mean
an example is if he's eating you out and you try closing your thighs around his face
he'd quickly wrap his hands around you legs, and spread them back open, no matter how hard you try to close them
or using his strength from training constantly to fuck you against a wall, if he's feeling particularly rough that day
definitely fucks you if he's stressed about a day in the training room (or stressed in general)
i don't make the rules
has THE best ways to ask for consent
"you want this?/tell me how you want it."
"you want me to make you feel good?"
OR HE'D JUST DESCRIBE WHAT HE'D DO TO YOU
fave position is probably the mating press cause he loves being able to go down and kiss you and see your face
or you riding him because he loves the way you lean onto him and eventually tire out
and when you do, his grip on your waist is harsh enough to cause bruises as he harshly thrusts into you
probably has a thing for restraining you
loves how shy you are when you come to him asking for sex
he'd usually drag it out to tease you even more before finally giving you some relief
fingering god i love to say it
you see the way he works his hands!!!
definitely whimpers here and there, especially when you're giving him a blow job
if you have enough hair, he'll personally make a makeshift ponytail for you
if not, he'll simply run his hand through your hair
praisepraisepraise all day
probably goes feral once he's close to cumming
would start babbling literally any dirty talk that comes to his mind
"you're doing so good for me."
"gonna cum for me, yeah?"
extra: DON'T GET ME STARTED ON HIM IN HEAT.
idc what anyone says he goes through it since he's half galra
the first time, he'd lock himself in his room and hope that it would eventually pass
but of course, as clueless as you were, you walked in and questionably gazed at all the stranded tissues on the floor
he'd try ushering you out, but after a moment to decide, you wanted to help him
definitely WAY more rough than usual
you'd come out with bruises everywhere and hickeys as far as the eye can see
a lot more vocal during this
he would love the way you would try to speak up but couldn't because it felt too good
you might be shy yourself, but whenever you got into the mood. . . you definitely weren't thinking straight
during heat he wouldn't even have the time to make you beg or tease you, he'd go all in immediately
definitely praises and degrades you a lot more
"being such a perfect little slut for me, hm?"
just know that after you guys finish, you're both too out of it to even speak or move, until eventually keith snaps out of it and helps you get cleaned up
sometimes you would get up first, wanting to return the favor
and he'd repay you with a lot of tired kisses until the two of you fall asleep
slightly hate this cause im so rusty at writing smut lol
#keith kogane x reader#x reader#keith voltron#voltron keith#keith kogane#keith x reader#voltron mtl#voltron x reader#voltron#keith x reader smut#keith kogane x reader smut#voltron x reader smut
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⚡︎ ┊ TMNT : Finalized designs & Headcannons.
⚡︎ ┊ Finished my official designs, now I can make comics and such without them looking different every time.
!! HEADCANNONS BELOW IMAGE, FOR ANYONE INTERESTED.
⚡︎ ┊ HEADCANNONS.
Leonardo
Cannot be sneaked up on (Will catch whoever tries)
Lots of night terrors
Light sleeper
Loves bubblegum
Superiority complex
Talks to himself out loud
Really good at lying (Best liar in the family)
Always smells good
Very overprotective (especially over Mikey bc he's the youngest)
Annoying older brother vibes
Argues with Raph the most
Sleeps with one eye open (literally)
Allergic to dogs
Only turtle who CAN cook
Can't watch horror films (they freak him out)
"IDC" Thinks about it for hours
"I'm not scared!" Freaks out
Hates bugs
Raphael
LOVES Halloween. (Has decorations all over his room)
Heavy sleeper
Snores but says he doesn't
Mr.Sarcastic
Picks on Don the most
Swears in nearly every sentence
Metalhead
Bedroom? No, Mancave. (Barely leaves his room)
Talented artist
Plays the bass guitar
JUGALLO RAPH REAL!!
Hates everything and everyone.
Edgy middle child attitude
"IDGAF!!" Starts crying
Likes Mikey more bc he can playfight rough with him.
True crime >>>
Horror movies >>>
Works out to calm himself down
Only shows his "cool" art to his brothers, keeps everything else hidden
Always looks angry no matter what
Can't control his tone of voice (Speaks really loudly, and aggressively)
Hates being told what to do
Deathly terrified of roaches
Missing a tooth (From a fight with leo)
Donatello
Very very VERY tired
Mr.Fix-it
Germaphobe
Neat-freak
Really picky with food
Won't eat spaghetti or most noodles bc it reminds him of worms
Hates wearing most clothes because they make him feel trapped
Gets hiccups when nervous
Doesn't drink coffee, though likes energy drinks
Must double check everything a billion times
Throws a fit when someone messes with his plans, or things
Swears as much as Raph
RARELY in his room, mostly in his lab.
Hates the smell of dust, sage, and greasy food
Likes collecting pens
MOOD SWING KING!!
Paranoid all the time
Insomniac
Almost always accidentally falls asleep in his lab.
Sticky notes, sticky notes, sticky notes
Can only draw mechs and vehicles, cant draw anything else
" We're poor as dirt " Has thousands of dollars hidden in his room.
Has to wear glasses but doesn't around his brothers (they pick on him :( )
Likes psychological horror better than visual horror.
Slouch king
yells a LOT
Listens to techno music when making inventions
#1 oingo boingo fan
Has slight bucked teeth
Speaks with a lisp
Michelangelo
Spoiled younger brother vibes
Loves video games
A LITERAL GOD AT DANCE DANCE REVOLUTION
Hates being left alone, or away from his brothers for long periods of time
ALWAYS asking Donatello for money (usually a yes)
LOVES candy (especially sour)
Borrows April's camcord to take stupid videos
Cracks every bone in his body when nervous
"The vibes are off right now…"
" Dudezz!! " " Chill out brozz " type of guy
Wears braces!
Always doing stupid shit
PRANK LORD
#ILOVEBEINGATURTLE!!!!
Sings in the shower
Puts on whole concerts for no reasons
Plays the drums
LOVES play fighting with Raph
Likes cooking, but cant do it good.
"CAN WE KEEP IT!!"
"I licked it, it's mine"
Steals from everyone, thinks its funny
Hides Donnie's tools for fun
Talks too fast
#digital art#artists on tumblr#teenage mutant ninja turtles#tmnt#tmnt redesign#tmnt design#tmnt headcanons#tmnt 2012#tmnt leonardo#tmnt raphael#tmnt donatello#tmnt michelangelo
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Royal Pain Part 26
Hello, and we have got to the end of the massive arc that culminated the last four chapters.
I also wrote this part before 24 and 25 because I couldn't figure out how to write Eddie having a hard time on tour, but the aftermath flowed from my fingers.
Also as a reminder this story is finished, I'm just posting on a regular schedule. This story is the longest fanfic I've ever written. Topping out at 58165 it's definitely longer than 50K fic I wrote for NaNoWriMo last year (Sandman, never finished or published.)
Pt 1 Pt 2 Pt 3 Pt 4 Pt 5 Pt 6 Pt 7 Pt 8 Pt 9 Pt 10 Pt 11 Pt 12 Pt 13 Pt 14 Pt 15 Pt 16 Pt 17 Pt 18 Pt 19 Pt 20 Pt 21 Meta Pt 22 Pt 23 Pt 24 Pt 25
****
“You’ve been sitting on that sofa for an entire week,” Wayne growled. “Steve has called three times, your bandmates at least a dozen times each. Hell, boy Miranda has been calling concerned. So want to tell me what’s fucking got you so twisted?”
“I was given a choice out there on the road,” Eddie said, twisting his rings around his fingers. “Stay in Indy and play small time gigs for the rest of my adult life or go to LA and get an album and the chance at super stardom.”
Wayne sat down next him. “Sounds like a big decision to make.”
Eddie leapt to his feet. “That’s the problem. That’s what makes me so angry how fucking easy the choice is.”
Wayne cocked his head to the side. “Sounds like you’ve got a lot on your plate again, boy. Start talking.”
Eddie started pacing back and forth. “As much as I loved playing for so many people, I didn’t like that I could only connect with a handful of them and not even the good kind.” He rubbed his chin angrily. “I didn’t like how tired we all were. It was set up, sound check, play, break down and move on to the next fucking town. And that wasn’t including all the parties, interviews, and all that other shit.”
“That does sound exhausting, Ed.”
“I didn’t like how easy it was for them to tell me to drop Gareth as drummer just because he had trouble adjusting to the increased volume. The price of fame they said. Like it was so simple to throw away almost two decades of friendship for the sake of adoring crowds and hearing our music on the radio.”
“Oh, darlin’,” Wayne said softly. “They didn’t...”
“Oh they absolutely did,” Eddie raged. “I didn’t like how they thought that because me and Steve’s relationship was new that I would be able to find someone better. Someone who liked metal, someone who would be down for the ride.”
Wayne furrowed his brow. “That doesn’t sound like good advice.”
Eddie grabbed his hair pulled at it frustration. “The last straw was when they offered to let their tattooist to finish my back tattoo, because while my artist was good, theirs was better.”
He stopped abruptly and turned to face Wayne. “I picked Steve to do my tattoo on my back because he was the only one I trusted to make it meaningful. To understand the symbolism of making something of yourself when everyone is rooting against you. I made the decision before I fell in love with him and now that we’re a couple– and for them to just dismiss him like that? It made me so angry.”
“So what’s the problem? What’s got you so twisted around the bend?”
Eddie took a deep breath and let it out slow. “I’m fucking furious because I always thought that when fame and fortune came knocking I would throw open that door and march right through it. But now? Given the choice? I’m slamming the door in its face and walking away.”
Hot tears ran down his face. “And I don’t know why.”
He dropped to his knees and began to sob.
Wayne stood up and put his arms around his nephew’s shoulders, gently pulling him to his chest.
“Did that band you were traveling with say that?” he whispered into Eddie’s curls. “Because if they did, I swear to god I will burn every record and CD you have of theirs. Don’t think I won’t. I’ll delete them off your phone too.”
Eddie chuckled weakly. “No, no. They were kind. It was everyone else we met. Agents, managers, roadies, groupies, the people around Metallica every day.”
Wayne nodded.
“I was just constantly bombarded with hateful messages and the constant running at one hundred percent...” he whimpered. “I don’t want to do it.”
“Have you told your band that?” Wayne asked.
Eddie shook his head. “I don’t dare to. I was the one that was gung ho about the touring and everything. How do I tell them I don’t want to leave the comfort of Indianapolis and home?”
“Kinda like that,” Jeff said from the doorway. His arms were crossed and he was leaning against the frame. Peaking around him was Miranda with a concerned look on her face.
Eddie scrambled to his feet and wrapped his arms around his waist. “I’m sorry I’ve been a brat.”
Jeff took three giant steps forward and hugged him fiercely. “You’re not being a brat. You’re scared and trying to figure it all out on your own, but you don’t have to, okay? We’ve all been worried sick about you. But Steve especially. I’ll call all the boys down for a chat and you call Steve, okay?”
Eddie nodded.
He dialed the number he knew by heart.
“Baby?” he asked, unsure of the reaction he was going to get. He deserved to be yelled at. Cursed at. Broken up with. He’d hurt Steve the most with this little temper tantrum he’d been having.
“Eds?” Steve breathed. “Sunshine, are you okay? Wayne said you hadn’t been eating well or sleeping much. Say the word and I’ll be there in a heartbeat.”
Eddie’s lip began to quiver and tears spilled out of his eyes. “I need you. More than anything.”
“I’m on my way,” Steve said fiercely.
Eddie looked over at Jeff.
“Tell Steve Brian will swing by and pick him up.”
Eddie nodded and relayed the message back to Steve.
“I’ll be at my apartment,” Steve said. “I’ll have Robin arrange my schedule, don’t you worry about thing, baby.”
“Mm’k.”
“I love you, Eds.”
Eddie closed his eyes and breathed in the warmth of that simple phrase. “Love you, too, pretty boy. Come quick.”
“I promise.”
*
Steve piled into Brian’s car. It was the newest, having bought it right before they got picked up by Metallica. He had finally saved up enough money to replace his beater.
Gareth and Gethin in the backseat. Gethin had come up to Indy to watch his twin’s apartment while he was gone and just ended up staying. He was currently looking for a job so that he could move in with Gareth full time.
At least that what they said on the trip down. The twins and Brian were intent on filling the air with talk and Steve let them. He let them fill him in on the tour and everything that had been going on since they’d left.
Steve couldn’t be for certain, but it sounded like that touring hadn’t been fun for anyone. Even after a week of rest, he could still make out the circles under their eyes and how hunched over they were with just sheer exhaustion.
A feeling Steve felt all too well.
Gethin was pressed against his twin’s side and was rubbing his neck soothingly.
Steve looked at Brian.
His face was set, hard and unflinching. He was going to make the drive to Hawkins as fast as he could and still avoid the cops.
Steve was grateful Brian was driving because he didn’t think he would have made the distinction to avoid breaking the law. He would have gunned it and flipped off any cop that tried to catch him.
After awhile, Steve was getting the oddest feeling that Brian was used to speeding down this stretch of highway because there were points where he would slow down for a few miles and then speed right back up.
Soon enough they were pulling up to Wayne’s trailer and piling out the car.
*
Eddie sat on the sofa with Jeff and Miranda on either side of him, just hugging him.
Wayne was busying himself in the kitchen, getting ready to feed the hoard that was about to descend on his home.
The door opened up and Brian, Gareth, and Gethin all stumbled through the entryway. Eddie was on his feet in an instant, Jeff and Miranda not far behind.
And then the trio at the door parted and there stood Steve. Looking just as tired and worn as Eddie felt.
“Stevie?” Eddie asked, taking a step toward him uncertainly.
Steve threw open his arms and Eddie ran straight into them. They wrapped their arms around each other and just sobbed.
“I’m here, Eds,” Steve murmured into Eddie’s neck. “I’m here. I love you so much.”
Eddie lifted his head and kissed him hard. “I love you, too. I regret leaving you behind, sweetheart. It nearly killed me. Every song I wrote was about you. About missing you. I don’t even want to leave you ever again, I can’t.”
The silence that followed that statement was deafening.
Steve led Eddie back over to couch and sat them both down. “Tell us everything, babe.”
And so Eddie did. He told them everything. Everything he had told Wayne, everything that had been weighing on his mind since they started touring. It all just came out in a flood.
They all listened patiently.
“Why didn’t you tell us you felt like that while we were on the road?” Gareth asked. “I knew what they were saying about me, but I also knew you guys wouldn’t drop me. If you had me about that I would have been able to reassure you that I’m not going anywhere, okay?”
Eddie flushed with embarrassment. “I didn’t know how to bring it up, it was so vile, man.”
Jeff gave his hand a squeeze. “Well, I think that you did a bang up job telling us now and that’s what really matters.”
“Someone offered to ship me out to LA and record an album,” Eddie finally admitted. “Not the band, just me. I told him that I wouldn’t go without you guys and he laughed in my face. Told me to cut the dead weight and be a star.” He dragged his hands over his face.
“But there were other offers. Good ones. Ones that included the band, well most of it, anyway. Always under the proviso that Gareth be replaced either on tour or all together. They didn’t want to make any accommodations for him even though there is a drummer with one god damn arm!”
“So the options are,” Brian said, “stay in Indy doing what we’ve been doing, only better because of the money we got for doing this tour. Go to LA without Gareth. Go to LA with Gareth but only as a studio musician and take some person we don’t know on tour with us. Does that sound about right?”
Just then Gareth’s phone went off. He looked at it with a frown. It wasn’t a number recognized so he let it go to voicemail. He pulled it up after the notification popped up.
He listened to message with wide eyes. “Hey guys, I think we have another option.” And he played the message so everyone could hear.
“Hey, Mr Hughes,” the tinny voice said through the speaker. “This is Murray Bauman, I’m music producer, we spoke in Las Vegas. I think I have the perfect deal for you boys. You were telling me that touring was really hard on you and that if there was an option you wouldn’t do that. I know you weren’t speaking for all your band, but I could tell that they would do anything for you, all four of you being such good friends.
“So the reason for this call is that I own a small music company in Bloomington and boy do I have a deal for you all. You would make a record through us, we would sell and distribute the record, keeping a portion of the sales, of course. But you wouldn’t have to tour. You have a steady gig as I understand it. If your fans want to see you play, they’ll know where to find you.
“But give me a call, we’ll hash out the details. My phone number is 555-555-2080...” and then message beeped, signaling the end of the voicemail.
Eddie looked down at the phone and then back up at Gareth. “Oh.”
Gareth grinned. “We don’t even have to take his offer, but I vote we listen to it. Brian can bring Cecil.��
Brian nodded. “He’s only got a semester left of law school, but I’ll have him brush up on his contract law to be on the safe side.”
Jeff raised his hand. “All in favor of hearing Mr Bauman out raise your hand?”
Eddie, Brian, and Gareth’s hands shot up.
“Sounds good,” Jeff said. “You call him back and set it up and if it doesn’t work out we can vote again.”
Brian shook his head. “Nah. I think if it doesn’t work, we stick to Nightmare Holes. We took a swing at it and if it’s a miss then we tried. I thought I wanted the touring and everything that came with stardom, but like Eddie I learned I wanted the romanticized version of it. I’ll be happy playing in front of our friends for the rest of our lives.”
The rest of the band nodded.
Soon everyone getting up to go back to Indy, but Steve stayed behind, he would go back up with Eddie in the morning. They had things to discuss that went deeper then the band.
****
Part 27 Part 28 Epilogue
I told you I would fix it.
Also a little BTS, the reason in my head for why things went wrong on tour but immediately righted itself when Eddie and Steve met up again? Steve still has Eddie's lucky pick. ;)
Tag List: @spectrum-spectre @estrellami-1 @zerokrox-blog @artiststarme @swimmingbirdrunningrock @gregre369 @pyrohonk @bookworm0690 @chaosgremlinmunson @goodolefashionedloverboi @chaoticlovingdreamer @maya-custodios-dionach @messrs-weasley @val-from-lawrence @plyerice27 @thedragonsaunt @sapphirecobalt-1 @a-little-unsteddie @i-must-potato @danili666 @carlyv @rozzieroos @wonderland-girl143-blog @itsall-taken @justforthedead89 @emly03 @aizawa-emma @yikes-a-bee @redfreckledwolf @thesuninyaface @bookbinderbitch @archermightbegay @littlewildflowerkitten @scheodingers-muppet @hallucinatedjosten @ellietheasexylibrarian @anne-bennett-cosplayer @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @bestwifehaver @xxfiction-is-my-realityxx @oldwitcheshat @nightmareglitter @tinyplanet95 @novelnovella @jonesn4coffee @slowandsteddie @awkwardgravity1 @steaddie-on
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Mending a Family 8/?
Prev | Next
I'm back! Sorry for the long wait, my laptop broke, and it took a while to save the money up to fix it.
Here's the next chapter; sorry it's so short
They’re looking for you.
Jason had received the text from Roy not even a minute ago. He didn’t have to ask who ‘they’ were. Jason knew the Bats wouldn’t leave well enough alone and let him live his life, but he had hoped. He sighed; he couldn’t worry about that now.
“Everything’s okay, daddy?”
“Everything’s fine. Let’s go finish packing your things.”
Jason had found a new place for them to stay in the following days since they found Jazz and Ellie. Thankfully, he had money, or they would’ve been stuck in the small cabin for a while. Jason smiled as he watched Danny hum while putting away his few toys.
The cabin had come furnished, so Jason had bought new furniture to be delivered to the small three-bedroom house he had rented. It wouldn’t be their permanent living space. It was only until he could buy a bigger house.
The kids would have the smallest rooms, Jazz would have the biggest, and Jason would take the second-biggest. He didn’t have much and hadn’t had a chance to take his books out of storage yet, anyway. Jazz walked into the room and watched Danny while she fed Ellie a bottle. He didn’t have much and hadn’t had a chance to take his books out of storage yet, anyway. Jazz walked into the room and watched Danny while she fed Ellie a bottle.
Ellie waved at Jason and then smiled. Jason couldn’t help but smile back; she looked so much like Danny.
“I have to thank you again for doing this for us.”
“Nonsense, Danny is my kid now, and you’re his sister, well, my sister. Family sticks together.”
Jason and Jazz were now the Nightingale siblings. They were raising their kids as single parents. If asked, Danny’s mother died during childbirth, and Jazz’s no-good boyfriend left her and their daughter behind. The two siblings decided to pool their resources together and raise the two cousins under one roof.
Jazz had just turned eighteen, but her new fake ID said she was twenty. Jason had aged himself up, too. He was twenty-three instead of twenty.
“Not many people would help a random kid they met in an alley, let alone adopt him and then take in his sister and clone.”
Jason shrugged, “I’m not like many people.”
He ignored the voice that told him he was becoming Bruce.
“Besides, I’m being selfish; Danny has helped me with my pit madness.”
“His ectoplasm was yucky, Jazzy.”
Ellie finished her bottle, and Jazz helped burp her.
“Hmm,” Jazz hummed while looking a Jason. It made him want to squirm.
“Once we settle into the new place, I’ll tell you both what happened in our dimension. Right now, I’m too tired to recount things.”
“That’s fine, Jazz. Take your time. I’m not in a hurry to find out why I’m so small.”
“He’s right,” Jason reassured her, “you don’t have to tell us yet; you’ve been through a lot.”
“Thank you,” she whispered.
Jason smiled, “now, who’s ready to see their new home?”
____
“Roy, please, I need help.”
Roy gritted his teeth; he was tired of Dick pestering him.
“You have the rest of the Titans looking for the poor guy, and Batdad probably has Superman on his ass. You don’t need me.”
“I just don’t understand why you’re not in a hurry to look for him to find out if he’s okay. It’d be one thing if you knew already—unless,” Dick’s eyes narrowed.
“Of course; why didn’t I see it earlier? You do know where Jason is, and you didn’t tell anyone?!”
Roy dodged the first punch but was unable to escape the kick. Dick got him by his shirt and slammed him against the wall.
“Where is he?”
Roy almost forgot how much of a bad temper Dick had and how scary he could be.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“I swear to God, Roy if you don’t tell me where my little brother is…”
“Even if I knew, I wouldn’t tell you.”
Dick scowled and let go of Roy. As Roy walked away, Dick yelled after him.
“We will find Jason and bring him back home.”
Roy ignored the man; he was too full of himself.
Reminder that you can leave me prompts
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Destiny ♡
Pairing: Kōshi Sugawara x fem!reader
WC: 2.3k
Genre: fluff, soulmate au
CW: you’re a twin to oikawa meaning your looks will be similar, some cussing, fluff fem!reader, oikawa is annoying, iwaoi mentions
˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖
"Tōru, the preliminaries are right around the corner, I swear to god if you overwork yourself," I glared at him putting my hands on my hips.
"Relax, I'll be fine. As always." He chuckled running a hand through his glorious brown hair.
"I'm so disgusted by you.." I mumbled and walked away from my annoying brother.
"Aren't we all?" I heard iwaizumi chime in from beside me.
"You guys are so mean to me!" Tōru whined, trying to get us to pity him.
I rolled my eyes and walked off to gather towels for the boys on the volleyball team. As the appointed manager, I had a great time working with almost all of them.
Even Kyoutani, or as Tōru likes to call him, 'Maddog-chan'.
"Here, do you need more water?" I softly asked Kindaichi as I handed him a fresh white towel.
Our hands lightly grazed each others as he took it. I could definitely tell my presence made him visibly nervous.
High school boys, am I right?
"S-Sure!" His voice was suddenly very high pitched in his response.
"Alright.." I've slightly gotten used to being the girl around but half of the time it was awkward due to me being related to Tōru.
I grabbed his water bottle from his hands while gathering the rest of the empty ones too. Better fill the rest of them up whilst I'm at it.
"Huh, you must have the hots for me too if you like my sister. We're practically the same person." Oikawa chimes in all dickheadedly. And this is my exact thirteenth reason.
I heard Tōru say as he slung an arm across my shoulder.
"Don't touch me, Shittykawa." I growled with a glare and headed out of the gym, annoyed that I'm unfortunately related to him.
"Yep, the exact same." I heard iwaizumi snicker sarcastically to Tōru. I picked up that little nick name for my brother from Iwaizumi, of course.
I was surprised, Tōru sure did have balls for saying that in front of his soulmate. Who likes to throw balls at his stupid head, which I may add.
What a dumbass.
Even if Kindaichi did like me, bless his poor soul, I was going to wait for my soulmate. However, it didn't especially feel like I was going to see them anytime soon though.
I was always feeling a tiny shiver here and there, not exactly burning.
You see, the way we find our soulmates is basically a game of hot and cold. The closer we are, it's hot but farther we are, it's cold. Some fucked up life game if you ask me.
I wasn't particularly cold nor hot, just averagely warm more than half of the time.
I've heard it goes away once you find them and then you'll feel tingles or something when you touch. How the heck would I know? I haven't met the person.
However, the thoughts of my soulmate were pushed to the back of my mind as the Inter-high Prelim's were coming up.
I wanted to make sure Aoba Johsai won to nationals. As much as I always find Tōru a pain in the ass, I do want him to be happy. Even if he is boastful about himself a lot of the time.
I carried the bottles back, some of them slightly wet. I had to make sure not to drop any of them on my way.
"Alright, we're done for today. Make sure you guys stretch and rest up." Tōru said all captain-like as everyone got finished with putting the supplies away.
I eyed Tōru making sure he was coming along and not staying behind to continue his extra practice that he doesn't need.
"Calm down. I'm coming, jeez." I heard him say to Iwaizumi as he slung his bag on his back.
"Uh huh, I thought I'd have to drag your flatass out the gym." A retort sounded through the gym.
I stifled a laugh as Tōru and Haji argued back and forth about my brother's ass. Which now that I really give some thought about it, that sounds weird.
"Please stop, I don't want to hear about Tōru's flatass." I grossly commented.
"You two are so-" Oikawa started up with but immediately got cut off.
"Would you look at that, this is my house. Bye (Y/n)." Iwaizumi said, purposely cutting Tōru off and ignoring him.
"See you tomorrow." I waved and continued my walk home with a grumbling Tōru behind me. Our house was, coincidentally, only a couple houses down from Iwaizumi's.
I looked up at the night sky and silently wished the best for my team. Although, I wouldn't ever dare to admit that.
"Tōru? Aren't you going up against Tobio? Your kouhai?" I asked as we headed inside, taking off our shoes.
"First of all, he isn't my kouhai and yes I am. I'm going to beat him in an actual match and prove I'm better than him." He sassily retorted to me.
"Isn't he, like, a first year?" With Toru and I being twins, we both are in our third year.
However, that doesn't make us alike in anyway possible, except maybe looks and of course the relation of family.
"Yeah, why do you ask?" He slightly peered behind me, curious of my intentions.
I shrugged, "You sound immature when he's a first year and you're a third year." I pulled the, 'you're older' card on him like he was dumb.
"Hmph, no it doesn't! Mom!" He rushed into the kitchen to probably tell on me like the little snitch he is. Doesnt matter whether graduation was coming up or not, Tōru still had the motive to act like we were five.
"Tch, childish." I rolled my eyes and headed in there too, to defend myself of course.
"Ah! There are my two favorite headaches! Come help me set the table." I heard mom say as I saw Tōru take offense to what she said.
"Quit being a baby." I looked at him with a pointed expression and set the plates down.
"So mean." He grumbled.
I knew he couldn't insult me physical wise because we are the gender bented version of each other. However, sometimes he knew how to stoop low. Brother or not, he could be ruthless.
"Well, at least I'm not the one without a soulmate." He placed his hands on his hips and smiled triumphantly with an eating shit grin. Although, that didn't last long on his part.
"Don't say that to your sister." I heard dad enter the kitchen and scold him, very convenient on my part.
I grinned brightly at my dad who backed me up as I ignored the dull pain in my chest at not yet having found the other part of me.
Tōru stuck his tongue out at me and I did the same. Hey, if he gets to act childish why can't I do the same?
"Isn't it a bit hot in here to you?" I pulled at my shirt collar. I had taken off my jacket yet I thought about it because it was starting to get too hot for me.
"No? I'm playing in a match and it's not even that hot." Iwaizumi looked at me weird.
"Well whatever it is, it needs to pass." I glared at nothing in particular. I hated being hot, the feeling only made my mood worsen at times.
"Okay, now you guys go out there and win this." I supportively said, pushing the heat on my body aside, and saw Tōru visibly cringe.
"No, stop. That's just..no." He shook his head in a disapproving manner at me.
"Iwaizumi." I merely grumbled, if I couldn't do anything, he surely could for me.
The next thing I knew, Iwaizumi had slapped Tōru on the back of his head.
"That's not how you're supposed to talk to your sister." He scolded. I heard the ref blow the whistle, signaling the break was over and it was time to get back in the game.
My gaze stayed focused on the game, not particularly on one player. I was following each move they made with my eyes.
Soon, the game had been over and Aoba Johsai had won.
"You guys did so well! I'm so proud of you!" I ran towards them, trying to hug all of them at once.
Suddenly, I heard a rough voice come from across the net as we were celebrating.
"Oikawa."
I turned around at the same time Tōru did, and coincidentally Iwaizumi turned too.
"Yes?" we three had answered simultaneously. I raised a brow over to Iwaizumi and stifled a laugh. Strange, I didn't think he would take our last name.
I saw the tall guy, who seemed to be familiar, look dumbfounded.
He quickly seemed to get over his pause, "Next time, we'll win." He said strongly as I saw their captain come and get him.
Before they could even react, I turned towards the two.
"So, Mr. Hajime Oikawa?" I watched the two of them blush as we walked off the court together.
"You two are hella dorks." I muttered at them with a smile on my face.
While they had started changing their uniforms I felt an enormous amount of heat flow through me.
I furrowed my brows unbeknownst to why and then it suddenly hit me. My soulmate must be here.
I started walking around, feeling to see if I had gotten warmer or colder. This really is just a big game of hot and cold.
"Uhh, what're doing?" I heard my brother ask from behind me.
"They're leaving." I whispered and started a fast-paced walk to where the warmth was leaving me.
"(Y/n)! you can't just run off like that!" I heard Tōru yell behind me as I booked into a run. God, I didn't want them to leave.
Soon, I was led outside. It was as if someone placed the sun beside me. I could feel it radiating all over my entire body. I was so fucking hot.
I saw the Karasuno team slowly walking towards and entering their bus. I couldn't spot anyone who exactly looked like they were close to fainting from the heat like I was.
"Hey! Wait!" I yelled out as I neared them. I just had to find them.
However, I didn't see where I was going and collided with someone. The heat I was experiencing, and almost fainted from, suddenly vanished and was replaced with tingles.
Lots of tingles like when your foot is asleep and you have to walk on it. But.. this was comforting, a little pleasurable.
Opening my eyes, I saw a silver haired guy in front of me, on the ground too. I could have cared less at the moment, I just needed to know.
Without thinking of my actions, I grabbed his arm, and sure enough there were tingles radiating up and down my arm.
"Oh my God." I heard him whisper to himself probably. I pulled into a hug as I heard footsteps nearing us.
"I can't believe I found you." I said which came out to a mumble since I was pressed into to him. I could smell his jersey, honeysuckle and linen, a surprisingly intoxicating scent.
I felt his heartbeat, which seemed like it would fly out of his chest at any minute. As if he realized we were still on the ground, he tore himself from the embrace. Standing up, he offering a hand to me.
"Thank you," I nervously said, I mean this was the person I'd most likely be spending the rest of my life with, according to fate.
"I'm Kōshi Sugawara, what's your name?" He moved a strand of hair out of my face, the tingles giving me chills as I shivered with delight.
Just as I was about to answer, a rude and annoying but all too familiar voice interrupted me, and our moment.
"Just what do you think you're doing with my sister, Mr. Pleasant!" I heard Tōru's God awful voice yell from a distance, coming closer with every second.
"Sister?" The man named Kōshi Sugawara questioned.
I looked toward Sugawara and sighed then sadly nodded. It was as if his team had tensed up with Tōru coming.
I mean, we did just beat them. Wait.. did they watch the entire meeting of me and Sugawara? Gosh, that is embarrassing.
"Tch, Shittykawa, can't you see i'm doing something?" I growled out at him, about to hit him when I stopped, seeing Iwaizumi in the distance.
Lucky for me, I have a future brother-in-law who can beat his ass for me.
He came up behind Tōru and grabbed his shirt by the collar. "You're such a pain sometimes." He muttered after bowing to us apologetically and dragged him back.
"Jesus, sorry about him. He really is a pain in the ass. Hi, I'm (Y/n) Oikawa." I smiled brightly at Koushi, my soulmate.
"I didn't know Oikawa had a sister?" I heard someone from his team speak up.
"Oh yeah, and it gets even worse, I'm his twin." I sighed in defeat at my words.
"Well, (Y/n) Oikawa. Here's my number, I would like to go out with you Saturday if you want? For coffee?"
I turned back to my soulmate upon hearing his voice and smiled brightly once again. He literally looks like an angel from heaven.
"Of course," I put his number in my phone and my eyes wandered upward towards the time.
They almost bulged out of my head, "Oh my god, I have to go. Uh, I'll see you Saturday Koushi? Bye!" I waved him off, missing the feeling of the tingles that would linger on my hand.
I couldn't wait for Saturday.
˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖
a/n: this is from my “Haikyuu x Reader One Shots” on Wattpad! I hope you enjoyed and let me know if you want more!
the header is from Jimena Martinez on Pinterest
#sugawara x you#sugawara x y/n#sugawara kōshi#boyfriend sugawara#haikyuu sugawara#sugawara koushi#sugawara x reader#hq sugawara#soulmate au#haikyuu soulmate au#haikyuu fluff#haikyuu x reader#haikyū!!#oikawa tooru#haikyuu oikawa#oikawa torū
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Fuck it Friday!
Once again, back with some parenting Buddie fic. I swear to god I'm going to finish the first chapter and publish it soon. Tagged by the incredible @thewolvesof1998
Buck returned moments later in a flurry of activity, hooning around the table and setting up the gifts so they looked just right. He placed the biggest box in the middle of the table and surrounded Aidan’s spot with smaller gifts that him and Eddie had been picking out for a couple of weeks now. Christopher remembered with a jolt that he’d made a gift for Aidan and scuttled off to his room to grab it, returning just as Buck was standing back and looking at the presentation with approval.
“Whatcha got there, bud?” he asked when Christopher appeared in the doorway, looking a little bashful.
“I made Aid something” Christopher mumbled, blushing a little and looking at his feet.
Ever since he’d officially become a teenager, Christopher had developed insecurities about just about everything. It had initially been small things, such as fussing about how his hair looked or moaning that his special orthotics made his shoes look weird, but recently, much to Buck and Eddie’s concern, it had progressed to doubting his abilities. Christopher had an affinity for art and had recently started creating some truly amazing works on his laptop with a programme Eddie had bought him a year or so ago. Buck would often wander into Christopher’s room to find him deep in concentration as he worked on his latest piece, tongue sticking out the side of his mouth and leg tapping up and down as he drew. Not only was it an excellent creative outlet for the kid but it had been having a positive, therapeutic affect on his fine motor control. However, recently, Buck had noticed Christopher becoming cagey about his work, turning his computer screen away whenever either of his dads walked into the room or getting snappy when they asked what he’d been working on. Buck had a feeling he was about to find out what it was.
Christopher shyly held out the paper in his hand and Buck’s breath caught in his throat.
Christopher had clearly put in a lot of effort into this. Staring up at Buck from the paper was an almost-perfect rendition of his son, grin so wide it almost takes up the whole page, with Christopher, Buck, and Eddie in the background. It’s so good in fact that it looks like someone took a photo of them and put a filter on it to make it look like a drawing but no, Buck knows Christopher has painstakingly placed every single stroke, every dash of colour. It’s enough to make a lump rise in his throat and he can’t do much more than clamp a hand over Christopher’s shoulder and pull him into his side.
“Is it okay?” Christopher asks and Jesus, Buck wants to hurt whoever might have given Christopher the impression that his art is nothing short of worthy of being hung in the Louvre.
“God, Chris, it’s amazing. I- I love it. Aid is going to love it”.
He can’t stop staring at it, can’t stop marvelling at the talent of the kid still pressed into his side. To think, it’s almost been 7 years since he met Christopher and, in that time, he’s watched him blossom into a smart, talented and extremely quick-witted teenager. One he’s now proud to call his son. It’s enough to make Buck a little emotional.
(no pressure) tagging @theotherbuckley @wikiangela @fionaswhvre @eddiebabygirldiaz @disasterbuckdiaz @fruitandbubbles @watchyourbuck @callmenewbie @cal-daisies-and-briars @incorrect9-1-1 @evanbegins @thosetwofirefighters @wildlife4life @911onabc @malewifediaz @loserdiaz @monsterrae1 @fortheloveofbuddie @jeeyuns @smilingbuckley @gayedmundodiaz @hoodie-buck (let me know if you want to be added/removed)
#buddie#eddie diaz#evan buck buckely#911 abc#911 buddie#911verse#evan buckley#911 fanfic#eddie x buck#911#911 fandom#9 1 1#911 fic#911 on abc#911hiatus2023#buddie 911#buck x eddie#christopher diaz#teenaged!christopher#buck and eddie#buddie fanfic#buddie fic#buddie as dads#dad!buck#fuck it friday#the buckley diaz family
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Unrequited love - Matty Healy x f!reader
Extra part II
A/N: This whole series is the definition of 'I wasn't planning to...but...' sooo I wasn't planning to finish it today but here we are. THANKS AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN about all the support!!
Warnings: jump scared?, swearing, FLUFF, typos.
Word count: 2.6 K
Series MASTERLIST
It wasn’t usual for the girls of the group to spend time without the boys, although from a time to the present they started to feel like it was necessary. Partly why, Charli, Y/n and Carly joined by the little James Hann were hanging around Charli and George’s home. The other reason was to spoil James without the rest of the band trying to have his attention.
Even though James was almost 7 years now, he was the little baby for the entire group. All of them loved Hann’s kid a lot and spoiled him rotten.
“Mom, stop! I’m a big boy!” James tried to stop Carly, who was trying to give him a kiss on his cheek.
She protested, “No, you’re still my baby.”
“I’m not!” he fought back.
“Until you are legal to drink, get in jail or a tattoo, you’re going to be my baby boy.” Carly continued to tease him. The sight from the other side of the table was a heart-warming one for Charli and Y/n.
Charli said to him, “I promise I’ll help you with the tattoo, James.” winking her right eye.
“Really?” James asked excited about it.
“No!”
“Yes!”
James’ mother and her friend shouted at the same time, making Y/n laughed, and a puzzled looked appeared on the kid’s face.
“Stop confusing him.” Y/n interrupted the bickering. “Come here, I’ll protect you!” she instructed him to come closer, opening her arms wide.
James ran towards Y/n, who engulfed him in a big hug when he was beside her.
“Can we draw like last time?” James waited for her answer, expectant.
Y/n didn’t wait for a second to reply, “Of course.”
James took her hand, forcing Y/n out of her seat. Together they started to walk towards a big hall, she knew where it went.
“Use whatever you want from the studio!” Charli shouted from behind them.
The two women fell into a nice chat, not only talking about their partners, adding an innocent pinch of gossip to keep the interesting conversation. Charli was engrossed telling her about the latest one going around their circle, when Y/n’s phone started ringing. Charli took it without taking a look at the screen.
“Y/n!” she called her.
“What?”
“Your phone is ringing!”
“Who’s calling?” she said, appearing at the end of the long corridor.
Carly stayed silenced, when Charli screamed, staring at the phone. “What?” she exclaimed into a thick English.
“What?” Carly mirrored her.
Charli instantly gave her the device, so she read out loud, “Baby M? And a…rat? What the fuck?”
Before Carly could call Y/n again, Charli gained the device back and took another look. A mischievous look appeared on her face, while her fingers went directly to the green button.
“Charli, no-“ Carly tried to stopped her but it was too late.
“Hello?” Charli asked.
“Hi? Y/n?”
Charli instantly knew who it was and wanted to laugh, even though she contained it. She was going to have fun with it as long as she could.
“No, I'm her friend. Who’s this?” Charly continued.
“Umm-”
“Sorry, can’t hear you.”
“Piss off Charli!” Matty finally exclaimed.
Charli let out the biggest chuckled, “Oh my god!” she managed to say next.
“What?” Carly asked beside her.
“Is Matty!”
Matty groaned from the other side, “Get Y/n on the phone!”
“Let me see.” Carly placed Y/n’s phone on her ear. “Hi?”
“Hi Carly, can you put Y/n on the phone?” Matty was more polite now that it was sweet Hann’s sweet wife.
“It’s him!” Carly opened her eyes wide, staring at Charli.
“I told you!”
“What’s going on here?” Y/n interrupted their moment, appearing in the kitchen area.
“Y/n’s here. Hold in line!” Charli said to Matty in a teasing voice. “I’ll communicate her with you, baby M, in a second. Thank you for your patience!”
“Fucking finally.” Matty replied at the other end of the line.
Y/n figured out what was happening with them and her phone right away. She took it in her hand quickly, moving a few steps away from the girls.
“Fuck.” she muttered. “Hi?”
“Hello, baby.” Matty breathed out.
“Are you okay? It’s urgent? Because I have the Scotland Yard officers staring at me waiting to interrogate the hell out of myself.” Y/n said, feeling two pairs of eyes in the back of her head.
“I was trying to ask what you wanted to order for tonight.” Matty let her know it wasn’t that serious. “Go and tell them.” He told her laughing.
“I’ll call you later.”
“Okay, baby.”
“Bye”
Y/n turned around, staring at them in silence.
“You have a lot to explain!” Charli broke the silence.
“Right.” Y/n said, defeated, coming to sit at the table.
“Y/n?” James’ voice came from the studio, calling for her.
“Coming James.” She shouted, smiling wide at the girls. “he’s-“ she pointed towards where the studio was.
“No, you stay here!” Carly stood up.
“I won’t break your son's heart, Carls!” Y/n explained, walking away.
“You can, I allow you!”
Y/n shrugged her shoulders, “I guess I’ll tell you guys later.”
“Are you two a thing?” Charli interrupted.
“Maybe.”
“Oh my god!”
James shouted once more, “Y/n!”
“Be right there, James!”
“I knew it!” Carly said.
“What?” Charli and Y/n stared at her friend, rejoicing herself about the new information.
Carly glanced between them,“Oh come on!” She turned her body to look directly at Charli “We all knew they were going to end together sooner or later. Remember we used to bet-“
“That’s a lot of information, Carly” Charli protested between her teeth.
“You what?” Y/n inquired them, surprised.
They talked at the same time, “Nothing.”
“I can’t believe you!” She turned around.
Carly stopped her, “What? It was a matter of time and a bit of fun for us!” she tried to defend the group. “I can’t believe you’re part of the girlfriends' club now.” she tried.
“I wasn’t invited before?”
“Y/n!” James was getting impatient, his drawing partner was absent for so long. That’s why he meet her at the middle of the hall where she was standing talking with the girls.
“I’m sorry I was-“ she was going to excuse herself, when the boy interrupted her.
“In the time you were gone, I draw this.” he gave her a piece of paper with a big drawing in the middle.
“Let me see.” Y/n took it. “Aww, it’s so beautiful!” she truthfully told him. James blushed.
“It’s you and me, and you’re reading that book you brought went mommy and daddy went out.” he explained, looking up at her admiring his work of art.
“James, I love it! I’ll hang it for everyone to see!” Y/n promised, going after to hug James.
He innocently asked, “I can go to your house to see it?”
“Yes, and we can read another book!”
“Yay!”
Carly and Charli shared a knowing look.
George’s girlfriend dare to whisper, “I think not only one boy of us is in love with her.”
—------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The whole group was once more reunited at Y/n house for a dinner before the boys had to return to tour and the rest have their own things to deal with.
Y/n already served dinner, a homemade casserole, everyone enjoyed making jokes and teasing each other.
She was leaving plates at the sink, so they could serve dessert, when a pair of hands sneaked around her waist. Y/n recognized Matty’s touch right away.
“Hi, handsome.” she greeted him.
Matty left a kiss on Y/n’s neck, “Hi, I miss you.”
Y/n giggled, “I’m sitting just beside you.”
“I know, not close enough.” Matty pushed his chest further into her back, proving what he was saying.
“You’re so needy.” she teased him.
“And you love it.”
“How did you know?” Y/n turned around inside his arms.
She inevitably thought about the night of her birthday when they almost kissed, and now they were there about to do it freely. Knowing very well that they loved each other more than friends.
“Because I know you like the back of my hand.” Matty’s chest full, proud to know so much about her.
Matty went to kiss Y/n, after missing her for the entire night. Y/n shut her eyes, feeling her arms and legs tingling. She didn’t know when the effect was going to stop, and she aimed for never. Every kiss was like the first for them.
“What the royal fuck?” Ross stopped at the kitchen door, gripping the bread basket between his large hands.
Matty and Y/n broke apart, although Matty rested his left hand on the small of her back. It was the time to tell the rest of the group, he was ready to scream his love for Y/n to all the people around him.
“Ross-” Matty started slowly.
“What’s going on here?” he looked between them.
“What happened?” Adam interrupted them, coming from behind Ross.
Ross left the basket in the middle of the aisle kitchen, screaming “Matty was sucking Y/n’s face!”
“Why are you screaming?” George was the second to interrupt.
“Care to explain, mate?” Adam glanced directly at Matty.
Even though he was ready, once he tried to explain, “We- we’re kinda…” he didn’t know where to start.
“We’re together, guys.” Y/n clarified for the rest of the band.
Ross folded his arms, “For real?”
“For real.” George said instead of Y/n or Matty.
“You knew?” Ross looked at the drummer of the band, in awe.
A smirk appeared on Hann’s face, “It was obvious.” which surprised Y/n and Matty because they thought they were very cautious about it.
“What?” Matty stared at Hann, trying to figure out what he was saying.
“We all knew it was a matter of time…”
“Yes, but still…” Ross protested.
“Why you lots are clucking like chickens?” Charli joined the rest of the group in the kitchen area.
“Y/n and Matty are together…and George knew…” Ross was the one that informed her.
Charli turned to look directly at George, “You knew?”
“Yes, but-” George tried to defend himself.
“You’re sleeping with the dog!” she warned him.
“Charli, you knew as well!” Y/n sided with George.
George’s face changed with this new piece of information. “Care to explain, babes?”
“I found out days ago. When you?” Charli dared him.
“Weeks?”
Charli stared at his face, and proceed to walk out of the room.
“Babe-” George followed her.
“I knew it was going to happen, but this is surreal.” Ross expressed his thoughts out loud.
Matty strengthened his grip around Y/n’s waist. He felt so relieved to be able to show his love so openly, even when it was a small gesture.
“How did you know, Hann?”
“I bumped into you guys making out in the kitchen studio…didn’t notice me. I chose to keep my mouth shut and see how you guys acted out. It was funny.” Hann said, leaving the pair with their mouths hanging open.
“What was funny?” Carly made her appearance in the room.
“Matty and Y/n making out in the kitchen. Do you remember?” Hann reminded Carly about it.
“Oh, yes!”
“Carly, you knew?” it was Y/n’s time to be stunned.
James’ mother shrugged under Y/n’s scrutiny, “Hann told me?”
“What about not telling everyone?” Ross interrogated Adam.
“She’s my wife!” the guitarist tried to defend himself.
“True.”
“Come here, Ross.” Y/n said after taking a look at his still stressed face. She walked far from Matty, rounding Ross’ big form, “You’re still my favourite” she mumbled into his chest.
“Excuse me?” Matty wasn’t happy with Y/n’s affirmation.
“Where is the dessert?” James barged into the kitchen. “What’s going on?” he took a look around all the grown-ups.
“Uncle Matty and aunty Y/n are boyfriend and girlfriend.” Carly explained him.
Y/n returned to Matty’s side, waiting for James’ reaction.
“Oh.” he said lower, staring at the couple. “I’ll wait for the dessert at the table then…” he excused himself, exiting the room.
Hann glanced at Carly, “What was that?”
“He’s a little crush over someone…” she moved her head pointing to Y/n.
“For fuck’s sake!” Matty groaned loud. “I’m not sharing, Y/n.” he warned her.
“Don’t be mean.” Y/n hit him playfully, “I’ll talk with him.”
************************************************
James was seated on the chair he occupied the entire night, staring at George and Charli chat at the other side of the glass. The couple was sharing a cigarette and chatting playfully, leaving behind any resentment of the secrets in the group.
“Hey.” Y/n took a seat beside Hann’s son.
He turned his head around to look at her, “Hi.”
“Dessert is coming. A little late, but it's coming.”
“Cool.”
“Are you okay, James?” Y/n inquired.
“Yes.”
“Are you mad with me?”
“No.”
Y/n chose to not say more. She wanted to give him the time to express his worries –if he had them– peacefully.
“Since Matty is your boyfriend now…” James started slowly, shy. “Are you going to stop reading and drawing with me?” he twisted his fingers, not looking up at Y/n’s face.
“No! Never!” she gained his attention again. “I won’t stop being your friend, James!” Y/n reassured him. “Do you want to stop being my friend?”
“Never!” James smiled wide.
“I’m so relieved!” Y/n told him. “Come here.”
Y/n was side hugging James when the rest of the grown-ups returned to the table.
Matty took a seat at the other side of James. “Here’s your piece of cake, Jimbo.” the frontman left a slide of chocolate cake in front of him.
“Thank you!” James tanked him before stuffing his face with it.
Matty couldn’t help to look at Y/n. She smiled at him, making his heart skip a bit.
*******************************************
It was hours past James’ bed time, when they group moved to Y/n’s living room. James was deeply asleep on Carly’s lap, she was chatting with Ross and Charli meanwhile Hann and George went outside.
Matty and Y/n were cuddling on another couch, in front of them. He had his arm around Y/n’s shoulders, keeping her close.
“You’re really sweet with James.” Matty said, kissing her hair line.
Y/n looked at James’ looking like an angel while sleeping, “I love that kid.”
“Me too.” Matty agreed. “I hope this doesn't sound bad, but I think you’ll be such a good mother one day.” he stated.
Y/n turned her head to look at Matty’s face, “Why?”
“You’re super tender and caring, baby.” Matty ran his hand between Y/n strands of hair.
“Are you getting all soft, Matty?”
“Only for you.”
“Thank you, babes.”
“What about me? Do you think I can be a good father?” Y/n noticed the note of worry between his words.
Y/n sit up properly, caressing his right cheek with her hand, “I do, Matty. I think you’re going to love the soil your kids walk. Always wanting to give them all the best, be the best parental figure…I know you’ll do anything for them.” she was fully convinced of it.
“For our children.” he cheeky said.
“Matty-”
“If you’re not the mother of my babies, I don’t want to have kids…”
Y/n rolled her eyes, resting her head on his shoulder, “That’s a lie.” her eyes heavy with sleep.
“It’s not!” Matty dissent. “I want everything with you, Y/n.” he gazed down at her face.
Y/n settled on his shoulder, “Me too, I love you.” she said before falling asleep, leaving a speechless Matty. It was the first time she said it out loud.
He couldn’t wait to remind her about it in the morning. Adding how much he loved her himself.
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Tagging: @jagz72 @deamus-liv @mrspeacem1nusone @sofaritsalrightt @soci4lc4sualty @thefemininemystiquee @hswannaknow @louweasleymalfoy @indierockgirrl
#matty healy#matty healy fic#george daniel#the 1975#matty healy x reader#matty healy fanfiction#matty healy fanfic#matty healy imagine#matty healy x y/n#matty healy x f!reader#matty healy x you#matty healy fluff#matthew healy#ross macdonald#adam hann#matty x you#matty x reader#matty x y/n#matty healy fan fic
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I’ve arrived with more horny william brain rot!
There is little doubt in my mind that our favorite afton to slut up likes to read. He’d probably love to share that with his darling bunny. And you absolutely know that man is making the polaroids he took into bookmarks. He just loves to see his bunny everywhere!
Bunny is in fact a college student, and sometimes certain classes end up requiring/give the option for a field trip. And that trip happens to fall on a weekend. They’re a little bummed, Willy is like actually depressed (lol), so bunny decided to hide a little something for him. As a ✨treat✨
So when afton wakes up Saturday, he reaches over for his book to read a little (because what else is there to do when his little rabbit is gone), and his usually bookmark feels a lot more lumpy than usual. So he opens it and what does he find? Polaroids of his precious, lovely bunny in nothing but his shirt, and a pair of her panties 💜
YEAH i uhhh,,
warnings: age-gap relationship (reader is 20 will is almost 40 yall know the drill), swearing, smoking, drinking, dom/sub undertones, sir kink, not proof read AGAIN IM SRY
"What? What do you mean the whole weekend?"
It had been an especially hard week for the brit at his diner. For one reason or another, it seemed as if nearly every single damn brat in that town just had to have a birthday that week. The diner was booked from start to finish every day of the week. William was frustrated. But every day drew him closer to the weekend. Closer to when he'd be able to see you again. And god did he fucking miss you. He missed his little bunny next to him; kissing them, holding them. Coming up with so many fun activities to show you.
But, it was in the past now. It was Friday. You'd be over tomorrow, and help relieve him of his pent-up stress like the good bunny you were.
Right?
Wrong.
"I knowwww, I'm sorry!" You pleaded with him at the other end of the phone, the older man taking a long, drawn out puff of his cigarette, "I just totally forgot about it until today!"
William sighed as he rubbed the bridge of his nose, leaning against the wall, "And you're certain you have to go, love?"
"Yeah..." you sighed back, "It's required for my major. And I already rescheduled it last month, too. I can't do it again or I fail."
"Bunny, the weekends are our time together. You know this."
"I knoww, and I'm sorry! I'd stay behind if I could but I just can't. I'm sorry, Will. I'll be back for next weekend though!"
William took another puff of his cigarette, "Are you certain you can't come over even for a little? I... I miss you, bunny. It's been a tough week, and... I want you."
You let out a sympathetic hum, "I miss you too. But I have to go. I'm sorry."
"Alright." William sighed, "Fine. But don't expect to get off the hook next time I see you, little one. You need to tell me these things sooner rather than later."
The brit heard you giggle over the phone, "It'll be fine, Will. Surely you can survive two weeks without me."
"Getting smart with me now, hm?"
"No, sir."
William let out a pleased hum, "Good bunny. I'll miss you, okay? Have fun for me, alright? I'll be here waiting for you."
"I will, I will... Hey, before I forget; you remember that book you gave me, right? The old, thick and dusty one?"
"It's not old, love. It's classic."
You giggled again, "Classic, sure. Well, I finished it. I'll leave it in your mailbox before I go. Maybe that'll keep you occupied until I get back."
"Nothing could replace your company, little one. But, thank you. That's very kind."
"It's no problem. I gotta go pack now, Will. I'm sorry again. I'll see you next saturday, okay?"
"...Alright, bunny. Have fun. I love you."
"Love you too."
~~~
It was odd to have an empty house on the weekends. While William was used to Michael being away at his mother's, the house felt more depressing than usual without you in it. Dull. Grey. No life whatsoever.
William didn't drink often, not at all. He never found it to be that classy, and he wasn't about to throw his charm to the wind over alcohol. But god fucking damn it. He missed you so fucking much that Saturday afternoon. His cigarettes weren't having their usual kick to them. He needed something stronger to fill the void where you should be.
Pouring his second glass of whiskey for the evening, he couldn't help but wonder how you were. Your college was taking you an entire state away from him. Those fucking bastards. How dare they drag you so far away from him. What if you got hurt? Or in trouble? And he wasn't there to save his precious bunny? You knew his number, sure, but you were still so fucking far away from him. And a lot can happen so many miles away.
William took a large swig of the alcohol.
Fucking hell. He missed you so damn much.
He knew you didn't mean to tell him about the trip so late. You were a good bunny. Hell, he was the entire reason you didn't go when you were supposed to. He vaguely remembered convincing you to stay in town the first time you told him about it. You had just forgotten this time, surely. He couldn't stay mad at you for that. It was hard for him to stay mad at you in general. You were just too cute.
But William was miserable. He didn't want this shit to happen again. You would need to learn your lesson. And he'd make you learn it next time you were over.
But would he? Thinking of it now, it was hard for him to imagine giving you any sort of punishment. He just wanted you close to him. To pull you in his lap and kiss those sweet lips of yours. Hold you close to him. Lie down on his chest while he read his books before bed.
Oh, yes. That's right. The book he leant you. You said you'd give it back before you left.
Maybe he should take your advice. Use it to get his mind off you.
Finishing up his glass, William finished up his glass before he walked to the front door, opening and shutting it behind him as he made his way to the mailbox. The cool breeze of the sunset blew his neatly-combed hair out of place, washing over his pale skin. Upon opening up his mailbox, sure enough. The book he leant you was in there. But, it was... strange. Looked a lot fatter than normal.
The older man reached in and took the book out, brow furrowing in slight confusion. Leaning against the mailbox to shut it, the brit opened up the pages to see inside.
...
Oh.
William could feel the heat creep down his neck and cheeks.
Oh.
Oh, bunny. Sweet bunny.
Strewn about the pages was a handful of polaroid pictures. Pictures of you. In so many different positions... so many. He could see the plushness of your thighs. Your sweet little smile. Those big, gorgeous doe eyes. Your cute little pair of underwear...
You even still had some of the marks he'd given you last time you were over. And was that his dress shirt? It certainly was. How long have you had that, little one? Why, sir barely noticed that it was gone. Stealing his things now, are we? Naughty bunny.
You've been so bad recently, haven't you? William didn't much appreciate that. You had earned yourself a punishment, bunny. You probably know that just as sir does though, don't you? Was this your attempt at getting out of it?
William calmly shut the book, but quickly walked back into his house.
It worked, bunny.
For now.
#I JUST ALK;FDJA;FLS#CHERRY BEING THE DEATH OF ME PART 2#GOODNESS GRACIOUS THE FOOD YOU GIVE US#IM HOWLING#william afton x you#william afton x reader
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I FINISHED CHAPTER 12! (Basically... PS says I have like 7% remaining and that is probably gonna be leaving the Gold Saucer again so... yeah)
I HAVE THOUGHTS BRO.
Zack??? ZACK FAIR??? How dare you be the most beautiful gorgeous cute man ever. His sections always manage to have me tear up. The ending of this game is SO gonna hurt me my god.
My date was with Aerith... which i didn't mind but Cloti for the win you know. Aerith, girl, Zack is somewhere out there!
Didn't bother with any of the new minigames at the Saucer yet, since I wasn't a fan of a lot of them the first time around. Will probably only do it after finishing main story, since some of the exchangeable rewards are very nice.
Loveless was wonderful. Teared up seeing Jessie again. The song was so moving. The party acting as the main cast had me rolling tho. THE WAY YOU COULD CHOOSE BARRET AS YOUR TRUE LOVE? They're so unserious. The little game mechanics were a little confusing tho. I swear I don't have a left-right-weakness but this part had me questioning. Managed to get score A but still... wish there would havd been earlier triggers that told you what button to press... but maybe that's just me.
BUT THE COLOSSEUM HAD ME QUESTIONING EVERYTHING. WHAT DO YOU MEAN BASICALLY 6 ROUNDS OF FIGHTING BACK TO BACK AND THERES ONLY ONE OPPORTUNITY TO CHANGE YOUR EQUIPMENT. The first two rounds were easy, when they brought put the Tonberry I was having war flashbacks to the boss fight in Corel. Didn't expect a round 4, but Aerirh and Phoenix came through for me <3
THE TURKS AGAIN THO??? Listen, I'm a proclaimed Turks lover okay. I love them. My pookies. BUT YOU'RE GONNA MAKE ME FIGHT THEM A THIRD TIME NOW?? Elena is always easier to handle, Rude kinda annoying still but we got through it. Wanted to take this opportunity to say how much I love Elena being such a hater. And her having the most bone chilling horror movie scream when you land a hit or pressure her. Queen.
BUT THEN RUFUS??? ALONE AS CLOUD??? I was gnawing at the bars of my enclosure bro. I hate blonde men. Had to restart several times to get his patterns down. Was very upset with my inability tp dodge, usually I play my fights pretty head-on offensive... I was shaking crying throwing up until I had Rufus down to like half his health. Kujata on Cloud really helped me idk. Darkstar was annoying, but got him down eventually after using Clouds Limit TWICE. Almost died when Rufus was only like 3% HP remaining. The way I was shaking when it was finally over... damn. Never wanna do that again but I had already heard that the Rufus fight was pretty annoying...
Cait's betrayal was nothing new to me, I did know about it. Still made me sad ofc. THE WAY YOU CAN'T PLAY WITH HIM AFTERWARDS? I'm heartbroken.
Now it's off to the Temple/The Promised Land. Very curious what the last 2 Chapters are gonna bring. Heard 13 was quite long, but I wanna try and play it all now without any more interruptions... gonna play side quests and minigames later. Maybe I'll even be able to finish this weekend, which would be nice. I'm on vacation next week and won't be home...
So that's that. Enjoy some screenshots I took during this chapter!
#mays gaming#final fantasy vii#final fantasy 7#ffvii#rebirth#ff7 rebirth#ffvii rebirth#final fantasy 7 rebirth#final fantasy vii rebirth#ff7r spoilers#ff7r#ff7 remake#cait sith#cloud strife#sephiroth#zack fair#ff7 zack#aerith#aerith gainsborough#tifa#tifa lockhart#gold saucer
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[part three] of linked arms and bruised hearts (you are the reason i keep on going) ➵ ji changmin
non-idol!ji changmin x reader, slight non-idol!jacob bae x reader
you and changmin have been best friends since high school, having seen each other at their best and worst. now in your second year of university, you are given the opportunity to work with the unattainable 5th-year you have had a crush on since—jacob bae. with your best friend on the receiving end of your rambles, you could only hope for something to come out of your time working with jacob. that is until changmin decides he wants something more out of his relationship with you.
genre/warnings ➵ friends to lovers, slow burn, so much FLUFF, afab reader (they/them pronouns), slice of life, so much platonic love in general, suggestive themes, expect a lot of sentimental talks and bantering between changmin and reader, a lot of publication talk (a lot heavier for this chapter but i swear it plays a big role!! sorry i am a writer), light angst on jacob's end (i'm sorry baby), kind of shit opinion piece though (i literally don't know how to write that shit i'm sorry for the writers who read this and are knowledgeable about it!!) kissing and poetic words both from reader and changmin, very minimal chanhee x hyunjae x younghoon, a lot of tearjerker moments
word count ➵ 26k words
parts ➵ check out the series masterlist
taglist ➵ @deoboyznet @kflixnet @blankjournal @winterchimez @sungbeam @miusgirl @jenoscafe @sweet-unicorn-world @mosviqu @vernyangel
a/n ➵ oh i can't believe i finally finished this :') i'm very sad that i have concluded the journey of reader, changmin, chanhee, sunwoo, kevin, and jacob. this story feels more like a commemoration of friendships under the guise of a romance-centric one, if i'm going to be honest. and i'm glad i took my time crafting a universe that shows just how strong and beautiful friendships are overall. i hope that this fic brought you as much comfort as i did writing it </3 you can check my full author’s note here. i would really appreciate it if you could take the time to reblog this.
want to be part of my taglist? send me an ask!
main masterlist
When the morning comes, every part of you is ridden with anxiety. Not a wink of sleep was gotten as your mind kept drifting everywhere. How can you like your best friend? This is Changmin; the one who intimidated you at the first meeting; the one who likes to make fun of you and your stupid decisions. This is the same boy who you saw in that god-forbidden shaggy haircut back in high school.
And how did it take five years for you to figure that out? Have you just always liked him? That would be impossible, right? And are you even sure you like him like that? Is this not another case of you mistaking platonic love for a romantic one?
Your eyes look at the clock that sits on the bedside table, showing that it is 9:24 AM. With a sigh, you look up to the ceiling with a rattled brain. Clouds of thoughts kept appearing even in your exhausted state. What does it mean to like your best friend? Is this not a threat to the friendship you have spent building over the years?
And yet, when the image of Changmin comes into your mind, you almost want to scream. Even the thought of him makes you want to vomit your guts out. Your best friend is just an average-looking guy. How can you like him after liking Jacob? God, do you not like the senior anymore?
Before you can entertain such thoughts, you hear someone knock on the door. You quickly sit up and rub your eyes before getting off the bed. In hopes you have gotten rid of any possible sign of exhaustion, you open the door expecting to be met with one of Changmin’s sisters or his mom. But when your eyes land on the boy who has occupied every corner of your mind, your eyes widen in shock.
There he stood—fluffy hair and the same white shirt and navy shorts that you saw him in last night. His face was somewhat puffy from the sleep, but you could notice that his eyes were still droopy. And you fully expect yourself to snap back to reality—remember that he is just an average guy who happens to be your best friend. But god, the sight of him makes you realize that he is nothing like that. This particular view of him is almost too domestic, one that makes you imagine what it would be like to fall asleep and wake up in his embrace. And oh god, he is so absolutely fucked for showing up at your door like this.
At the sight of your shocked expression, Changmin cannot help but furrow his eyebrows. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine,” you choke out quickly as your expression starts to ease back to some normalcy. “W–what’s up?”
With narrow eyes, he says, “Uh, I just wanted to make sure you were awake. We’ll leave after lunch to catch the 2 PM train back.” As soon as you shoot him nothing but a nod, he looks you up and down. “... Okay, I’ll see you in the living room.” After giving him another nod, you quickly shut the door. You let your forehead rest on the door.
When it comes to having a crush, it is nothing but an easy ride, almost like breaking into a new pair of shoes. But liking your best friend? It is only a slippery slope, one that has you falling into the unexpected—the question is if you will come out with linked arms or a bruised heart.
“Y/N-ah, I don’t want you to leave on New Year’s,” Changmin’s mom says with her arms wrapped around you. As your chin rests on her shoulder, your eyes land on your best friend who is hugging his dad goodbye. “I mean,” she stops hugging you and rests her hands on your shoulders. “I just loved having you around the house. It feels like old times when you and Sunwoo would keep me company when Changmin went off to college.” The bittersweet smile on her face is a reminder of how much you have grown to be part of the family.
“Eomma, I’ll be back,” you assure her with a soft smile. She pinches your cheek just like how she first saw you back in the Ji household.
As soon as she lets go of you, she approaches her son to engulf him in a hug. You always knew that his mother misses his presence even more with every day that passes. So when it comes to seeing Changmin melt into his mother’s embrace, you feel your heartstrings tug at the sight. You do not listen to their conversation for it is their moment to share.
Once the two stopped hugging each other, Changmin quickly walked to the spot beside you. “I’ll see you again for graduation.” And when he suddenly links his arm with yours, your breath hitches. It is not that you are uncomfortable doing such in front of his family. Rather, it is your newfound feelings that make you hyperaware of every action.
But when his family shoots you two warm smiles, you feel your shoulders let loose. “You two take care of each other, okay?” His dad orders. And when you take a look at the boy who stands beside you, his eyes are already on you.
“Of course,” your best friend says with his eyes still on you. When his lips turn into a smile, every part of you finds itself melting. “We’ll always have each other.” The moment he looks away from you has you snapping your head back to the family in front of you. You do not miss the teasing smiles that come from his sisters.
“I’m glad you two have each other until now.” Yuna takes a glance at her sister. “I mean, you can see how Hanhee and Byungho are still together—I’m sure it’ll be the same for you two.”
You find yourself flustered over her statement, only realizing the hidden implications of her comparing you two with the other pair. But when you hear your best friend hum, you look at him to only see that godforsaken smile. His grin does nothing but wonders for you; it tugs on your heartstrings; it eases all your anxieties; it proves that everything good in this world is stored in one human named Ji Changmin.
And his reaction only has you hoping for the same thing for you and your best friend. Because who cares if you started to like him in that way? On New Year’s, you are still with him. What matters most is that you guys will stick like glue until the end—your friend group should remain together and withstand the test of time.
“Hey, you’ll be late for your train back,” Hanhee speaks up with a bittersweet smile on her face. When you look down at your phone, you notice that there are fifteen minutes left until the train departs.
With a sigh, you say, “Thank you again, and happy new year! I’ll see you again.” And just like that, you and Changmin bid farewell to the Ji family and your home as well.
Leaving Cheongju will never be easy. This town has everything you grew up with; the swing set that Sunwoo pushed you off too hard which caused the scar on your knee; the marts your friend group of three would rush to once you were dismissed; the familiar faces of your best friends’ families. And having to say goodbye to this place almost felt like saying farewell to a piece of you that you never want to let go.
But the reality is that you are not leaving forever—it is only a “see you” until you close the chapter you are currently in. And the past still lives within you, for you are a kaleidoscope of everything that you have learned to love, hate, and grow with.
You and Changmin dragged the luggage with arms still linked with one another until you finally arrived at the platform. Once your best friend shows your tickets to the man stationed, he gives you a nod and allows you to enter the train.
The two of you walked until you stood in front of your booked seats. Before you could grab onto your luggage, your best friend has already carried it to store in the overhead bin. “Hey, I can handle it.”
Changmin cannot help but chuckle at your statement. “Just take a seat.” You roll your eyes before taking a seat by the window. As soon as your best friend stores his luggage beside yours, he takes his spot in the chair beside you and lets out a sigh. Before you know it, the doors have closed and you are on your way back to university.
You cannot help but look through the window. Your eyes catch sight of the town you had to say goodbye to; some buildings have lost their color; the snow is slowly melting away; unfamiliar faces spread throughout the settlement. The city is not the same, but it will always be the place you love.
“Leaving Cheongju is never easy.” You are snapped out of your thoughts by your best friend who suddenly shares his thoughts. Once you look at him, you notice a sigh leave his mouth as his eyes look through the window. “I get homesick, especially when I think about Gana or Minho’s tteokbokki. I can only imagine how much harder it is for you since you haven’t been here in years.”
And you thought you would agree with his last sentence because this town carries everything that matters—from the memories to the people that you grew up with. But when you look at him, you allow yourself to smile. There is a reason why you were able to withstand being away from Cheongju—it just so happens to be because of the boy who sits beside you.
“You know what got me through it all?” As soon as he looks at you with furrowed eyebrows, you grab his hand to intertwine your fingers with his. “You. You’re a piece of Cheongju that will heal me of anything.”
You do not miss the way his eyes widen at your words. But the moment he starts to smile is something you will forever imprint on your mind. You look back through the window and notice that the scenery has changed to the rural areas.
“I never got to say this but I saw the stack you kept—the clippings of my articles from university.” When you feel his grip suddenly become looser, you look at your best friend whose face is painted with shock. “I never knew you would continue keeping my articles like you did back in high school.”
His gaze softens. “Of course I do, you’re my favorite writer.” You pout at his words. “I look forward to your articles. You’re doing good work, always.”
Everything about his words will remind you of a love so pure—one that you know you have the privilege of experiencing. You know you are lucky to have a best friend like him. Not everyone can say they are supported by someone in the same way he supports you. And you are thankful for everything he has done for you.
You look away from him so that you can rest your head on his shoulder. As you look at the passing scenery of greens and blues, you smile to yourself. “Happy New Year, Changmin,” you whisper out. You feel the way his shoulders move as he slowly breathes in and out. “I’m glad that we found our way to each other.”
The two of you sit in silence. The ever-changing scenery is enough to keep you distracted. But most of all, his heat is enough to lull you into slumber—one that you can only imagine how it would be like to fall asleep and wake up in his embrace. Another year has passed and you two are still together—you can only hope for a lifetime with him.
After getting off the train, you two continued to hold hands while making your way to the taxi stand. The area is not too busy despite it being New Year’s which would make it easy for you to find a ride back to your place. But a part of you wishes that there were long lines of people trying to catch a ride—maybe then it would be the perfect excuse to still stay with your best friend.
You turn your head to the right to face the guy who still held your hand. He lets out a sigh with a downcast gaze. “I guess this is where we part ways for now,” he mumbles before looking back at you.
“Yeah.” You smile as you turn your body to face him. “Thank you, again.” You look down at your hand that holds his. “I’m glad you let me spend time with you and your family for the break. I thought I would be fine staying at home but I realized that I would’ve been too lonely in the end.”
As soon as you let out a deep breath, you look back up to him who has a smile. “Hey, I’m glad you joined us. I’m sure my family loved having you over and would definitely keep the offer available anytime.”
For a moment, you two just smile at each other and occasionally look down at your linked hands. You both knew you were going to see each other in a few days, so why did it feel hard to say goodbye for now?
And before you know it, Changmin pulls your hand close to him so that he can bring you into an embrace. Your breath hitches at the sudden action—you are sure he heard it.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to–” Your arms find themselves wrapping around his waist before he can remove his off of you.
“It’s okay,” you whisper into his ear as your chin rests on his shoulder. “Just–let’s just stay like this.” And he followed, bringing you closer to him. He found his face snuggled against your shoulder.
Your eyes close for a moment. As your mind replays the events of the trip, you let out a sigh of contentment. You expected your break to be another time of slouching around doing absolutely nothing. Yet, this trip healed you of everything—it allowed you to live the life that you never gave yourself to reminisce about since entering university. But most of all, it gave you a moment of clarity that you desperately needed.
As soon as your arms started to loosen their grip on his waist, his arms let go of you. You two stood in front of each other with small smiles. “I’ll see you in two days, okay?” When you earn a nod from him, you look at the line of taxis. And before you know it, you dragged yourself and your luggage to one of the cars, not looking back to your best friend.
“What could you have possibly needed me for that could not wait until the semester started?” Sunwoo groans as he flops down on the chair by your desk. Currently, you are sitting up in your bed with your iPad lying around.
“Well, the semester is tomorrow! And I’m sure you would want to hear this.” Despite your attempt to explain your urgency (which is practically forcing him to visit you as soon as he arrives back), your best friend cannot help but frown at you.
It has been a day since you last saw Changmin—two days since you came to terms with your feelings toward him. Since the revelation, you have not gotten a wink of sleep. You were up in your thoughts as you kept constantly debating whether what you felt was platonic or romantic.
So when you called your best friend about a supposed emergency without allowing him to ask any questions, he had to hear you out. “Have you noticed that I haven’t unpacked my shit? I practically came rushing here!”
“And that’s how I know you’re a good friend.”
He stands up and says, “I’m going to leave now.”
“No! Wait!” Your frazzled reaction has him eyeing you down. As soon as you let out a sigh, you say, “Please, it is urgent. I’ll even treat you to lunch and help you unpack.” You look down at your hands. “I need to let this out or it will eat me up.”
The moment you let those words leave your mouth, you look back up to see Sunwoo with a worried expression. And just like that, he brings the chair closer to your bed so that he is within arms-length from you. He takes a seat and says, “Okay, I’m here. Tell me what’s going on.”
You find your eyes falling back to your hands that pick on the skin around your nails. It is silent for a moment. Your best friend gives you the time you need to muster up the courage to say what is on your mind. The moment your eyes land back on the boy who sits on the chair, you feel the words get stuck in your throat.
“I–god, this is harder than I thought,” you laugh to yourself as you shake your head.
Sunwoo chuckles. “You’re okay, it’s just me.”
You let out a sigh before sharing, “I think something changed during that trip.” When you are met with his confused expression, you scratch the back of your neck. “I think I like Changmin.”
“You do?!” The way Sunwoo shoots up from his seat has you clutching your chest, shocked by his sudden outburst.
“Jesus, Sunwoo! You practically gave me a heart attack.” Although you scold him, he pays no attention to whatever you have to say.
“I can’t believe you like Changmin!”
You roll your eyes. “I said I think, I’m not sure if I do yet.”
“You said yet. Oh my god, you do like him!” The boy continues to exclaim despite your annoyed expression.
You let out a frustrated sigh as you bite the inside of your cheek. “Okay, maybe I do.” As you whisper those words, you hear the way Sunwoo gasps. “But I don’t know if this is just me mistaking platonic love with romantic one like before with, you know, you.”
All your best friend does is roll his eyes. “Okay, but this is different!” Despite the worry-free smile on his face, you frown.
“How is it any different? Sunwoo, this is me liking my Changmin out of the blue. I’m pretty sure my crush on you played out the same way,” you argue before crossing your arms.
You expect some type of explanation from your best friend. Maybe he could give you some clarity since you desperately need it. But you are met with an answer that does nothing to help you out. “I don’t know—it just is.” You cannot help but let out a sigh. “Okay, why don’t you give me the full story first? Maybe I can help you out,” he offers with a smile as he grabs onto your shoulder.
And just like that, you gave him a recap of what occurred between you and Changmin during the trip—when you found the stack of clippings of your recent articles from the university’s papers to the hug you shared before parting ways. Every time you mentioned a new moment shared, you always found yourself looking up to your best friend who only listened. For once, he did not react or comment like he used to when you shared about your adventures with Jacob.
The moment you finish sharing, Sunwoo lets out a hum as his hands find their place back in the pocket of his hoodie. “You know, Y/N, I think you should just allow yourself to feel whatever you feel. Let it play out, and everything will make sense to you.” He watches you look down at your hands once more. “I know I say this all the time but I mean it, especially now. You’ll only be able to figure this out only with time.”
You hate that your best friend makes sense. When you opened up about your hesitation regarding what you want with Jacob, Sunwoo and Changmin always told you that only time could tell you such. And you did listen to their advice—only to be led to a spot where you are now liking the one person you did not want to jeopardize your friendship with.
“Hey, I know that look,” Sunwoo snaps you out of your thoughts. “You need to stop thinking too hard about it, and just let yourself feel what you want to feel.”
“But I don’t want to ruin what I already have with Changmin just because I can’t figure out if these newfound feelings are genuine or just from me being lonely,” you counter.
Your hesitation is valid. Considering that these feelings you harbor are towards your best friend, the stakes seem higher. You do not want your own emotions to throw away years of friendship. So you hope that Sunwoo can give you the answer that will ease all your worries.
Your best friend bites the inside of his cheek as he stares you down. “Y/N, I’ll ask you this: Do you love him?” As your eyebrows shoot up at his sudden use of the ‘l’ term, he shakes his head. “I’m talking about in general—don’t think about the romantic or platonic bullshit.”
Of course, you do—you love your best friends for they have been with you for every achievement and hardship faced. The love you have for the three demons is something that can never be challenged. You are here because they are your reasons to keep on going, no matter how difficult the journey may be.
Although you give him a nod, he sighs. Confused by his reaction, you find yourself frowning. That is until he asks you another question. “Is the love that you feel for him the same type that you experience with me or Chanhee?” And just like that, you feel your breath hitch. The frown leaves your face as your eyes widen at the sudden question.
Sunwoo shows you a small smile. “I think you know your answer then.”
The second semester has commenced. Although you expect to find yourself sitting with your friends by the spot that you four sort of claim, you are sitting in Morning Roasters alone. The thing is you are waiting for someone in particular to come—the 5th-year who is not as unattainable as you thought would be.
You two were supposed to schedule another date as soon as the second semester came. Jacob actually messaged you first regarding your availability. But when you told him that you needed to have a sit down with him, he then knew that the date would have to wait.
When he comes into the cafe, your eyes lock with his. You expect to see that typical smile that he always flashes at you. But instead, he only shows you a small one—almost bittersweet. The moment he takes a seat on the chair across from you, you take a sip of your chai latte.
“Hi, Jacob,” you greet him with a small smile. “I’m sorry about this. I just need to talk to you about something before we plan anything.” The chuckle that leaves your mouth is awkward.
“It’s fine,” he voices out, finally showing you that sweet smile. “I don’t mind seeing you—with or without dates.” Guilt rips and tears every part of you.
You both know what is going to be said. If anything, his words are an indicator that he prepared for your news—one that will break his heart. You wish that it did not have to play out like this, but it would be unfair to you both if you kept going on these dates without being honest.
Sighing, you manage to start, “Jacob, I really like you.” You slip out an embarrassing chuckle which only makes him smile. “I remember the first time I met you was at that one meeting Kevin held for the Features staff. I was the new recruit, and I can remember how scared I was until my eyes landed on you.”
“You know, the aura you brought around is just so comforting, and I think that’s what made me drawn to you. I have always thought of you as the senior who I want to be around—to get to know more throughout my stay. And when I didn’t get that opportunity to work with you in my first year, I thought you would only remain that unattainable senior who would plague my mind with ‘what-ifs’.” Your eyes drift down to your hands that are folded on your lap.
“I can remember how much I talked about you to my best friends. I mean, not only were you kind but you’re an amazing writer. I hoped that by some miracle, I could work with you. And somehow, the universe listened.” You now look up to the boy who sits there with a small smile. “In my time working with you, I have enjoyed every interview, every section close, every unofficial date. And I got to know you more outside of the persona I’ve created in my mind.”
You have only said good things because Jacob is nothing but good. In your time knowing him, he has shown you genuineness and kindness. He is everything green—from the way he treats you to the way he handles every article with utmost care. The 5th-year is who you should desire, and yet, you cannot bring yourself to do so.
“To me, you are a friend who I know I can enjoy my time with, whether in silence or work. I know I can go to you when I need company at parties or even just for meals. But at the end of it all, you are still the senior who I idolize. And I think I confused the idea of love with admiration.” As soon as those words leave your mouth, you notice the way he looks down at his lap.
Now, the smiles are gone from both of your faces. This confrontation is everything but easy. No matter how much Jacob seems to like you, your initial impression of your sentiments played out differently. There is no way to force your feelings to play out differently, and you both knew that.
“I–I’m sorry,” you choke out. “I wanted to give this a shot by letting time do its wonders, but I think that it just proved that my feelings now won’t waver.”
Jacob nods before his eyes reach yours. “Not even a second date can change it?” You know it is his attempt to make a joke. But with a smile on your face, you shake your head. From your answer, he nods. “I guess I missed my chance.”
For a moment, silence settles between you two. The tunes of jazz continue to play out softly through the speakers scattered around the cafe. The two of you continue to look into each other’s eyes as you let the news settle.
That is until he decides to break it with a question. “Y/N, can I ask you something?” When you shoot him a nod, he asks, “Do you think you would have given us a shot when you were a first-year?”
You bite the inside of your cheek. You have definitely thought about it—maybe you and Jacob would have had a chance if you worked together in your first year. And maybe you would have gone on more dates and eventually found yourself genuinely falling in love with the senior. What could have transpired between you two may have been a love story sweet like no other. But all these are just ‘what ifs’—that type of story playing out is not certain.
“I don’t know,” you find yourself admitting with your eyes now trailing down to the cup of chai latte that sits on the table. “I would like to think that it could’ve happened, but we’ll never know for sure.”
He lets out a sigh. For a while, he does not say anything. But when he asks the question “We can still be friends though, right?”, you quickly nod your head.
“Of course, Jacob. I value the friendship we’ve built.” You notice the smile that shows on his lips. “And it would be awkward if we break off ties since we work together.”
He laughs at what you say, shaking his head. “You’re right. And knowing Kevin, he’ll make us write together again.” He takes a moment to breathe. “I like writing with you, so I hope for more chances to have our bylines beside each other before I graduate.”
And you cannot help but feel heartache over his words. Jacob has only shown you nothing but tenderness. Even after shattering the possibility of you two ever being together, he still treats you with so much care. You know that it would be a privilege for anyone to be liked by Jacob—you are glad to say you got a taste of what it would be like to have a future with him.
“I do, too. I like working with you, and I’m glad that joining the publication helped me find my way to you.” As you say those words, you notice a bittersweet smile that paints his face.
Saying goodbye to a future that you fantasized about is difficult. You hate that all the scenarios you imagined of how it would be like to be loved by Jacob are ones you will never truly experience. Blame it on wrong timing or your confusion about what you think love may be—all you know is that a future with him is something you will not have.
It has been two weeks since you confronted Jacob. Despite how the events played out, you two surprisingly managed to interact without any awkwardness. It is not like you could say you went back to normal since your first interactions with him were when you still had a crush on him. But this new stage in your relationship is something you like for it feels natural like your other friendships.
Kevin held a meeting a few days ago to discuss the assignments for this semester. Now, you two are seated on one of the picnic tables as you try to work. Thankfully, the snow has melted away. While it is still cold, it is the type that you find yourself enjoying. You and Jacob were tasked to cover women’s sexual lifestyles in a patriarchal society. It is something you pitched, and you are happy to work on it with him.
“Okay! Welcome back, everyone! A new semester means a new set of articles to be assigned. Happy New Year, by the way.” Kevin shoots everyone in the room with a smile. “I love the story pitches! You guys keep improving, I’m impressed.”
It has been a week since you confronted Jacob. Despite how the events played out, you two surprisingly managed to interact without any awkwardness. It is not like you could say you went back to normal for your first interactions with him when you still had a crush on him. But this new stage in your relationship with him is something you like for it feels natural like your other friendships.
“Since it is, unfortunately, my last semester being your editor, I want to make the most of guiding you all. I’ll still be having you guys cover the topics I’ll be assigning, but I will now encourage you all to write opinion pieces. Not only that, I’ll be encouraging you to run for my position for the next year!” As he says those words, you cannot help but feel a heavy weight on your heart.
The semester has only started—how can you be pressured already? Before you can think more about your editor’s words, he snaps you out of your thoughts. “Don’t worry about it. I’ll be giving you enough time to think it over. So for now, I’ll just assign your pitches.”
He clears his throat as he looks at his laptop. You do not pay attention to him listing out pitches assigned to other individuals who are part of your staff. That is only until he calls your name. “Y/N and Jacob will work on women’s sexual lifestyles amidst the patriarchal and conservative society. Along with that, you two will also cover drag queens found on campus.” When your eyes settle on Jacob, you do not miss his smile. You shoot him a grin before looking back at your editor whose eyes are still on his laptop screen.
“That should be it. Yay! Don’t forget to schedule your ICs with me since it is required. We’ll be talking about potential opinion article topics and your plans for the next school year.” And just like that, Kevin dismisses the meeting.
You let out a sigh as you scroll through the questions you and Jacob are working on. “Do you think these questions should be fine for Kevin to review?”
Jacob lets out a hum as he scrolls through the shared document on his laptop. “Yeah, I think we can rephrase this question though to focus more on the shame that comes with discussing or participating in premarital sex.” He looks at you. “What do you think about that?”
“Yeah, that should be good on my end,” you say as you watch his attempt to rephrase the question found on the document. As soon as he finishes, you shoot him a smile. “I think that’s good! We can have these reviewed by Kevin, and then we can meet with our interviewees at their preferred schedule.”
You quickly type out an email to Kevin and make sure you attach the document before sending it out. Once you get the notification stating it was successfully delivered, you smile at your laptop screen. The first hurdle is over with. You think you can take a moment to relax until you are hit with a question.
“Y/N, do you have an opinion piece in mind?” As soon as your co-writer asks you, you cannot help but let out a groan. Your eyes move from the screen to his face. You notice the way he tries to hold back his laugh from your reaction.
“I have no clue.” You prop your arm on the table and rest your chin on your hand, a pout forming on your lips. “Do you?” As soon as he nods, you cannot help but gasp. “What do you have?!”
He chuckles at your reaction. “It’s very rough, but I want to talk about my experience growing up in Korea. I thought now would be a perfect time to talk about being an immigrant.” You nod, signaling for him to continue. “I mean, it really is just my journey to finding that sense of belonging since I’m a Korean who grew up overseas. Thought it would be nice to look back and talk about the people I found a home in before I graduate.”
You smile at how he shares his ideas with you. The way he talks about this opinion piece shows how personal it is to him. You only knew a part of the immigrant experience (mainly from memoirs you have read or interviews you conducted). But you knew that it is different for everyone, so you were interested to hear what Jacob’s experience is like.
“It’s nice to know that you want to share that. I’m excited to read it when you start writing it,” you say with a smile.
“Well, it still needs to go under some approval from the rest of the editorial board, but Kevin sounds hopeful. He says he’s going to push for it since he’s technically an immigrant himself.” You nod over his words.
You were well aware that two boys came from Canada. While Jacob may have been born and raised in Toronto, Kevin moved to Vancouver at a young age. So when the pair came to Korea for high school, they found themselves lost in the sea of people who already knew each other. But the universe eventually brought them together. And with that, they sought comfort in each other due to their shared experiences.
You were glad to know that the two had each other. Although you will never understand the struggles that come with being an immigrant, you know that the two boys finding each other made every day easier.
While the Canadian boys rely on each other, your friend group had one another. That is the beauty that comes with friendships—it starts unexpectedly with a stranger only for them to become your person in the end.
“But going back, you don’t have anything you’re remotely interested in talking about?” Jacob asks you once more.
Sighing, you say, “I don’t know. You think I can talk about my obsession with Bluey?” The guy cannot help but laugh. “I’m serious! I have no clue what to say. Do you think Kevin would let me off without writing one?”
He hums for a moment. “I mean, he would let you not write but I think he would be bummed out.” You let out a groan as you cross your arms on the table and rest your chin on them. “He would never push you to do anything you don’t want to do.” You can only sigh as you look off into nowhere.
“I just know that I have nothing right now. Literally got no good ideas worthy of being published.” You stare at the leaves that slowly move with the wind. Spring is slowly coming; you notice it in the way that the trees and plants have started to gain color; flowers are slowly about to bud; you can feel the slight warmth of the sun despite the cold air.
When your eyes drift away from the trees, they end up landing on a boy who has only filled you with warmth. You cannot help but smile at the sight of him. A hoodie drowns his figure, making him look cuddlier than ever. As he slowly makes his way toward you, you notice that his nose is tinted red from the cold air. And as soon as he sees your grin, he cannot help but smile back.
You find yourself sitting up from your slouched position before he makes his way to the spot beside you. “Hi, Jacob hyung,” he greets the guy who sits across from you two. And just like that, you link your arm with his. You do not miss the way his eyes glance at you over the sudden action.
Your head finds its place on his shoulder as you let out a sigh. “Changmin, I’m in trouble.” His body moves slightly as he lets out a chuckle.
“What did you do now?”
You blow raspberries as you look at Jacob who watches you both. “Kevin is encouraging us to write opinion pieces and I have no clue what to write about.”
“Y/N wants to write about Bluey,” the 5th-year chimes in.
A gasp leaves your mouth, making you lift your head from Changmin’s shoulder. “How could you say that?! I wanted to tell him myself!” The boy beside you giggles.
“I was going to suggest writing about that too,” your best friend admits. “Or you can write about me.”
You shoot him a frown. “Oh, be so for real right now.”
“What? You can write about how you can’t live without me.” The innocent smile that is on his lips only makes you want to wipe it off his face. And you cannot help but smack his arm with your free hand. “Yah! Why are you hitting me? I’m just throwing out suggestions for you.” His reaction makes you burst into laughter, making you snuggle your face into the space between his neck and shoulder.
You two remain snuggled up—one complaining while the other laughing over nothing. These moments perfectly encapsulate the dynamic between you and Changmin; the bantering that comes from nowhere; the sudden laughter that leaves you two when nothing hilarious happens; and the way you two always seem to latch onto each other. And Jacob bears witness to it all.
As he observes the sight of you two in your own world, an ill feeling rises in his guts—almost as if it is bile. He has never seen you smile or laugh like that with anyone else but Changmin. It is not like you react the same way around Chanhee or Sunwoo (based on his limited interactions with them). With your ears that are tinted red and the smile on Changmin’s face that contrasts with his complaints, Jacob cannot help but bite the inside of his cheek.
Everything starts to make sense to him—the two of you had unexpectedly crossed the platonic boundary that was drawn out. And now, you two were swimming in uncharted territories of adoration.
A part of him wants to laugh. Back then, he was convinced that something was going on between you and Changmin. Even if Kevin was insistent in convincing him that you two are just friends, he never knew if he could fully believe his best friend’s words. Blame it on insecurities or disbelief—it was just his way of protecting himself from the inevitable.
“I should get going,” he says as he shuts his laptop close. You lift your head from Changmin’s shoulder with eyes wide. “Kevin needs me to meet with him.” The lie leaves his mouth easily, and you and your best friend fall for it.
“Oh, okay! Maybe you can also tell Kevin we’ve emailed him the questions and the possible outline of the article already?” He nods at your words. And when you shoot him such an innocent smile, he cannot help but feel his resolve falter for a second.
When he stands up from his seat and carries his laptop and bag, you and your best friend bid him farewell. He turns away from the sight of you two and walks away with a heart heavier than ever.
As much as he hates to admit it, he still finds himself entertaining a possible future with you. Who can blame him? In his fantasies, he can feel your arms wrap around his waist as he cooks you a meal. You two would sway while he hums melodies. And you would litter kisses all over as he whispers sweet nothings.
But all of this is make-believe—he knows he does not stand a chance against your best friend who has permanently carved his place in your heart. It pains him to know that Changmin is a good guy; there will be no good reason to hate him. But with time, maybe he can come to terms that you will share your future with your best friend. For now, he will let himself wallow in bitter jealousy.
It is 3:34 PM. It has been two weeks since you complained to Jacob and Changmin about having no topic for an opinion piece. Over the weeks, you and Jacob were able to conduct interviews and gather the necessary information. After talking to the women who shared their accounts on sex amidst conservative Korea, you two wanted the piece to turn out well—capturing their experiences and sending out a message that will have people reconsider what they believe to be right or wrong.
Now, you are seated across from Chanhee by your friend group’s informal hideout. While he edits his photos, you transcribe away.
Although you two hang out with each other while working on newspaper matters, you have no idea what has been going on in your best friend’s life. To be fair, his schedule has always been the busiest out of everyone in the friend group. Being a photographer means he has to be present for almost every event or coverage.
Chanhee is your lowest-maintenance friend. In contrast to what you have with Changmin, you two could go on for weeks without having to talk to each other. Although you would occasionally pass by each other due to publication work, there are not a lot of instances to sit down and talk.
And you did not mind the distance—you were comfortable with the low-maintenance friendship for you two had your own priorities. What helps is that you both came from the publication, so you and Chanhee are aware of how difficult it can be to spare time in the day.
Being behind on what goes on in each other’s lives is not a sin. While some friendships like to see each other as much as possible (like you and Changmin) or be updated on everything (like you and Sunwoo), some could survive without constant updates or interactions. And that is the beauty of friendships—they operate so differently yet so similarly. Your relationships with the three boys may be distinct, but the love you all share is still the same.
But of course, your low-maintenance friendship does not mean that you do not want to update him about everything. If anything, the distance does make your heartfelt interactions more sentimental. So when you found yourself stopping the recording, you knew that you wanted to tell him about your revelation over the winter break.
You remove your headphones and hang them around your neck. “Chanhee.” The boy lets out a hum of curiosity before looking up from his laptop.
“Yeah?”
You take a moment to ponder over how to articulate your thoughts. And when you try to let the words come out, you feel them get stuck in your throat. “God, never mind.”
“What’s wrong?”
You shake your head before saying, “We’re both preoccupied with work, so I think it can wait.” You are met with Chanhee’s frown before he quickly types away and shuts his laptop.
“We can take a break. I want to hear what’s on your mind,” he says with a small smile. As he sees your pout, he sighs. “I’m serious. We haven’t sat down and talked in a while, so I kind of miss knowing what goes on in your life with Mr. Bae.”
The nervous chuckle you let out has your best friend taken back. “Yeah, about that…” You trail off as you scratch the back of your neck. “I am not going on a second date.”
“You aren’t?” When you shake your head, a pout forms on his lips. “What’s wrong? Not that great of a guy?”
A sigh leaves your mouth. “No, he’s great! Actually, the date we had was so sweet; we baked a cake together.”
“No way!” Chanhee gasps. “Where did this even happen?”
“Jacob always goes to this bakery run by this cute couple, and he’s close enough with them to let us use their kitchen.” You smile to yourself as your eyes trail down to your keyboard. “It was a cute first date to go on. But,” your eyes go back to Chanhee. “I don’t like him in that way.”
“Oh, Y/N,” he reaches out for your hand and holds onto it. “That’s okay. Sometimes, people are just meant to stay as crushes. You don’t have to pursue them if you don’t want to—let alone if you aren’t ready for a relationship.”
You bite the inside of your cheek. “Chanhee, there’s a bigger reason why I wanted to talk to you about this.” The way his eyebrows furrow in worry has you shooting him a bittersweet smile.
When you try to speak, you can feel the words hitching at your throat. Your best friend notices your hesitancy, making him caress your hand in a way that would allow him to stroke it in circular motions. And when you watch the way he shows you a comforting smile, you let your eyes close as you take a deep breath.
“I think I like Changmin.”
Despite your news, your best friend does not stop holding your hand. Your eyes open to see the sight of him still showing the same smile. And when he slowly nods, you feel your bottom lip quiver. Such a simple action should not speak a thousand words, but it is a hidden action reserved for you two—one that says, “I know, I have always known.”
And just like that, the waterworks turn on. The tears roll down your cheeks as Chanhee holds onto your hand. You never wanted to cry, but something about this moment had you vulnerable about something you have not stopped thinking about.
“How long have you known?” The question comes out like a whisper. You are afraid to hear his answer because it might change what you have always thought about your friendship with Changmin.
Chanhee lets his eyes trail down to your linked hands. “I think since the first time I saw you two interact,” he starts off. “When you introduced me to Sunwoo and Changmin for the first time, I thought that there was something special about you and my roommate.” His eyes then look back at yours, and his free hand reaches out to wipe away your tears with his thumbs. “It’s not that I have always known that you liked him, but I think what you have with him is like no other relationship.”
You cannot help but pout at his answer. “Is what I have with him not friendship?”
“No, it is,” he smiles at you as he wipes away one more tear. “It’s friendship, a beautiful one to begin with. But I also think it has always been more than that—something that you and Changmin were too blind to see.” His hand leaves your face and goes back to holding your hand. “And it’s not like it’s wrong, for you and him are the only ones who can define what you two have. I think you might finally be realizing that what you wanted was right in front of you all along.”
It is supposed to sound corny—Changmin being the person you wanted all along. But you hate to admit that Chanhee is right. Maybe that is why you have gone on with your life not particularly bothered by your lackluster love life (although it made you wonder if you would ever be desirable enough for anyone, really). The love you feel from your friends is enough to remind you of your worth. But the one Changmin made you feel is enough to push mountains and change seasons.
The birds start to chipper; the sun glows on you and Chanhee; the air smells of flowers. Despite the tears you shed just minutes ago, the world still moves as if it sings out the words, “Spring has come!” It is as if the universe echoed the message you found yourself reaching at the end of your conversation with Chanhee—there is no reason to be afraid of falling in love with your best friend for he is everything you hope for.
It is 2:27 PM when you meet with Kevin in the publication room. You and Jacob officially wrapped up your article a few days ago. With minimal comments from your editor, you both were happy with the output.
In the publication room, there is a small room where the different clusters usually hold meetings. You swing its door open to see Kevin seated with his laptop out. He looks up at you and shoots you a smile. “Y/N! Nice to see you on time for our consultation.”
You take a seat across from your editor. “Hi, Kevin,” you greet him with a small smile.
“I’m sure you already know what this is for. But just for formality's sake, thank you for having this individual consultation with me.” He claps his hands in joy. “Today, I’ll be talking with you regarding next year’s editor position and your opinion article.”
You scratch the back of your neck before saying, “I am not going to lie, I am not considering running for Features editor.”
Kevin shows you a smile, almost as if he expected your response. “Okay, let’s talk about it. Why did you decide that?”
You bite the inside of your cheek. “I think there’s just so much more for me to learn.” When he signals you to continue, you let out a small sigh. “I mean, I don’t think I’m suited for the position with my current skill set. There’s still so much I can learn!”
Your editor sighs as he moves his laptop aside. “I know we had this conversation back when you were still a 1st-year. Do you remember it?”
Of course, you remember that conversation vividly. When Kevin first approached you regarding your interest in taking over his spot after he graduates, you remember how insistent you were in denying it.
“Kevin, I don’t think you should be asking me about this,” you say with a small smile. “I mean, I have only gotten into the groove of writing for the uni’s paper just this year. I don’t think I am the best option to consider.”
Your editor pouts and says, “That’s not true. You are a perfectly good candidate to take over when I graduate. You’re a skilled writer with a good eye for topics to unravel.”
You shake your head. “I still think there is room for improvement when it comes to writing. And right now, I don’t have the capabilities to handle the duties and responsibilities that come with being an editor.”
It is one thing to be a good student journalist—being an editor is a different case. There comes a responsibility to ensure that everything goes in order. Not only that, you become someone the staff and the rest of the editorial board can trust. The idea of it all is anxiety-inducing, and now may not be the best time to consider it given that you are still adjusting.
“I really appreciate you for considering me, but I think that I still need to learn and grow as a writer before considering that responsibility.” As you say those words, your editor can only nod.
“Okay, I understand where this is coming from,” Kevin sighs. “I once was in your position when my old editor, Sangyeon, asked me that during my first year in the publication. I denied it, just like you, and kept explaining that my journey as a writer cannot end yet. But Sangyeon kept saying that running for the position would bring challenges that I need to face as a writer.”
For a moment, you think over his words. But before you can say anything, he continues, “You never stop writing and growing—think of it as a way to take up more challenges that will force you to think critically, to think of solutions, to really test you. And if it helps, you won’t be handling it alone because you have the rest of the board to rely on!”
Kevin raised really good points. Taking up an editor position would allow you to gauge if your future does lie in journalism after all; it would allow you to learn before entering the workforce. But now, you do not think you are capable of handling it.
“I can at least think about it,” you start off. “I have one full school year to think about it. But for now, I am not planning to run.”
Your editor smiles and says, “That’s better than an immediate no.”
You let out a sigh. “Yes, I remember. But I still think that I need to work under someone’s guidance. I don’t think I am suited for the editor position.”
For a moment, he does not say anything as he thinks over your words. Before you can add any more excuses, he interjects, “Y/N, I will tell you this—I think you have learned as much as you can as a writer. During my years being your editor, I think that the growth you’re looking for comes with applying for a position on the editorial board.”
You cannot help but pout at his reality check, but you know he was right. “I know you’re considering a job in journalism, so I think this would be a good opportunity to at least prepare you for it outside of your internships.” Kevin shows you a small smile. “You still have a few months to consider since applications start around the latter half of the semester.”
When you simply nod, he lets out a small sigh. “Y/N, I just want you to know that you are very capable of being an editor—that you are destined for greatness” You cannot help but smile at his praise. “I understand that it is scary because of the responsibilities, but it is worth the experience.”
The best thing about Kevin is that he has always looked out for you. Even in your first year in the publication, he always made it a point to look out for every member of his staff. Whether it would be writing issues or mental health concerns, he would find a way to help. Now that he attempts to possibly hand you the position (if no one else runs for it), reality is starting to hit that you would not be under his care.
“Kevin, I’m going to miss you,” you say with a pout.
He shakes his head as he slightly rolls his eyes. “Okay, we are not having that sappy talk. Reserve it for the last meeting.” You cannot help but chuckle. “But going back, let’s talk about your opinion article.”
Your pout contrasts his smile. “I have no clue what to write about.” A sigh leaves your lips. “Like, I’ve talked to Jacob and I’m still hit with absolutely nothing.”
Kevin chuckles at the way you complain before saying, “I get it. Sometimes, thinking about a topic you’re passionate about is hard considering the character limit implemented.” You nod at his words. “Okay, so maybe we can start with your life, you know. Why don’t you guide me through the years?”
With that, you let out a sigh as you recall your years growing up. “Well, school was school. I was your average student. I can’t recall too much about the super early years, but I do remember grade school being the period I was exploring a lot of hobbies.” You hum for a moment. “Oh! I also met Sunwoo that time because we were seatmates.”
Your editor smiles. “Ah, Sunwoo! I’m surprised, you know? Not a lot of people can say they’re still best friends with their childhood friends.”
“Yeah,” you chuckle. “We were always seatmates for some reason, so the proximity forced us to interact. I can remember how passionate he was about soccer, which I guess started my journey exploring different activities. I mean, something about his passion made me want to experience the same thing.”
For a child like you, seeing someone with so much enjoyment from participating in an activity feels revolutionary. The determination your best friend had to succeed in every soccer practice or tournament made you imagine the feeling that comes from hard work being paid off. It is something you want to experience.
“So, I ended up going through different hobbies like drawing, playing instruments, and even doing sports. But when I was forced to read a book, I somehow picked up writing as my hobby.” You shake your head at the memory as you look down at your lap. “Funnily enough, I remember hating reading and writing in my early years only until I started reading this one fantasy series. I was just so fascinated with these worlds, and I thought I could do it myself.”
The only reason why you were forced to read was because your English teacher warned your parents about your grades in the said subject. With that, you were handed a book to read. Although the first few pages seemed like a chore to get through, you eventually found yourself being invested in the said book. You ended up asking your parents to buy you the whole series before you knew it.
“Although I tried to do creative writing bullshit, it never worked out for me. I don’t know, I just don’t think I was capable of building such grand narratives. But reading books did start my love for academic writing, oddly enough,” you say as your eyes trail back up to Kevin who sits and listens to your story. “I remember it reached a point where I would join competitions for essays and whatnot.”
You let out a hum as you took a brief look up to the ceiling. “I think it was at a competition where I first found out about Feature writing since it was a big event with other writers of different age groups. I can remember when I first told Sunwoo about my interest in it, and he was so supportive.” Kevin nods along with a smile, showing that he is keeping up with your story.
“It felt so nice to be supported by my best friend in a craft that I had no experience in, you know? So when high school came, I applied for my school’s newspaper team and Sunwoo decided to try dancing for something different. And these crafts brought us to Changmin.”
A smile starts to creep on your face as you remember your entire high school life with the two. And Kevin cannot help but feel his heart warm at the sight of you reminiscing the years spent with the two boys.
“Did you know I used to be intimidated by Changmin?” As soon as you ask that question, your editor cannot help but laugh.
“Are you serious?” The nod you give has him laughing. “But, he’s so baby! How are you scared of him?”
You roll your eyes and say, “I swear, he was intimidating. I think the way he presented himself in high school made me scared of him. And I remember when Sunwoo introduced me to him for the first time. Our interactions felt so awkward mainly because we never talked, and I thought I would only have to see him whenever Sunwoo dragged him along. So when I got accepted into the publication, I was not expecting to see Changmin as a photographer.”
You cross your arms as you lean back in your chair. “Then we somehow got paired together which eventually started our friendship,” you say with a grin. “And with the many instances working together, Changmin and I grew so much closer.” Kevin nods along.
Before you could share more, another thought appeared in your mind. “Oh, god. Back then, I used to have a crush on Sunwoo for a while.” You notice the shock that appears on your editor’s face. “I know, it was weird, but I would talk to Changmin about it. Now, they won’t get off my ass.” You roll your eyes while shaking your head.
“But I can vividly remember that while these guys seemed to have love lives, I didn’t. And you know, it used to bother me because I was the type to always jump from different crushes but never actually have something go past the infatuation stage. But they have always been the people to listen to my lovesick rambles.” You bite the inside of your cheek. “I appreciate them so much because they never made me feel lonely, you know? Even if I never went on dates or experienced the high school love that the two got, they always made sure to keep me company.”
Kevin hums as he nods. “No, I get it. Like, their love is enough, you know?”
“Yeah!” You smile at how he understands what you are trying to say. “Like, they do so much for me despite how much we tend to rile each other up. And I remember how the two took me on this date a few days after Sunwoo’s first date.” You sigh at the memory with a small smile.
“And when Changmin left for college, I remember how devastated we were,” you say as your smile slowly starts to drop. “Weirdly enough, his absence left a huge hole in my heart. It wasn’t easy to contact him because of different schedules and obligations. So when Sunwoo and I finally graduated, we were so happy to see him again.”
When your eyes land back on Kevin, you notice that he remains attentive to your story. “I think that experience taught us that we did rely on each other, but we needed to find a way to coexist without it being too codependent.”
“Yeah, I get what you’re saying,” he interrupts. “The distance revealed that your friendship was turning into codependency which started to reach toxic levels.” You nod. “Yeah, Jacob and I went through the same thing—our friendship became too interdependent which prevented us from growing.”
You let out a hum. “Yeah, exactly that. So when we entered university, we made this collective agreement to let our relationship flourish into a healthier one. It was a long process until Chanhee came into the picture.” As you mention his name, Kevin cannot help but smile.
“After entering the publication and getting to work with Chanhee for my first few coverages, I thought it would be nice to introduce him to Changmin and Sunwoo. And I think it was only then we realized that the group was incomplete until he came in,” you say as you rest your arms on the table. “And I just think our group has evolved into one that I would never trade for the world. I think I was able to grow with them while witnessing their growth as well.”
When you see Kevin nod, you cannot help but sigh. “Sorry, I went on a tangent. But yeah, other than applying for this publication, working with you and Jacob, I guess that’s all that really went on with my life.”
He shakes his head and says, “It’s fine, I liked hearing the story of you four getting together.” You show him a small smile. “I think you have your opinion piece, you know? I think your whole story is a reflection of how strong platonic love is.” As soon as your head tilts to the side, he takes it as a sign to continue. “Your story shows how much you and your group were able to grow through the love and care you fostered. And in your case, their love is enough to a point you were able to remain unbothered by your lackluster love life.”
And it is true—your friends are the reason why you never find yourself lonely in a world that seems to glamorize romantic love. You cannot deny that you still long to experience it, but your friends have shown you love that is more than enough.
“Yeah, I think I can write about that. I realize how much I love to talk about my friends, so I think writing about them would be nice,” you say as you find yourself slowly nodding. “I think their love has put me in a comfortable spot where I don’t feel the need to constantly seek out the romantic love people always talk about. And even if it would still be nice to experience it, I don’t think I’m in a rush to find it. I experience enough love in my friendships.”
Your editor nods with a smile on his face. “It’s a nice topic, and I really think it would resonate with a lot of people. I think we put so much importance on experiencing romantic love, but I think all forms of love should coexist—one should never have more importance over the other.”
And you nod along with his words. That is what you appreciate about Kevin—he always knew the right words to say and made sure to relate to your sentiments. In your time working under his care, you never once felt misunderstood by him because he listened.
“Is it weird to say that I have learned about love through them?” When the question leaves your mouth, he shakes his head. “I guess because I have never gone on dates or experienced that high school romance then, everything I know about love is because of what they showed me.”
He cannot help but smile. “I think it’s nice that they taught you so much about love by showering you with it. And in your story, they don’t give you too much love that makes it suffocating.”
Kevin is right. Through your friendships, there have never been any notable instances where the love you receive from Changmin, Sunwoo, and Chanhee reached a point of toxic levels. Despite the codependency issue that only revealed itself when your best friend moved away for university, the love that they have shown you throughout the years is nothing but pure—one that comes in the form of supporting each person’s independence while fostering an environment of vulnerability.
“You really do love your friends,” your editor quietly points out.
You find yourself nodding with a smile on your face. “I appreciate those three because they’re my reasons to keep on going.”
No matter how wounded your knees may get, how tired your eyes may be, or how bruised your heart may get, you always find yourself continuing to go on thanks to them. The love and support they give you is a reason enough for you to continue on such a difficult journey that everyone is bound off to. What makes it all comforting is that you know you are never alone in this expedition called life—you were traveling with your friends after all.
It is 6:23 PM. You find yourself seated on the floor of the dance studio as you attempt to write your papers all while your best friend practices a routine he choreographed for the year-end concert. These were moments you found yourself enjoying—you two would work on your own obligations while still accompanying each other. Not only did it hold you accountable to get work done but it made you feel less lonely.
Your brain was preoccupied with what Kevin told you a few hours ago. There is a lot to consider—both when it comes to your opinion piece and the Features editor position. Are you capable of writing such a personal piece that everyone could still enjoy reading? Could you even handle the responsibilities that come with being an editor? Did you have it within yourself to balance your priorities?
With all these thoughts, you cannot help but let out a frustrated sigh. Your opened document is filled with nonsensical phrases and unfinished thoughts. Clearly, you were not in the headspace to work.
Your eyes leave your laptop screen and land on Changmin who goes through his routine slowly, trying to perfect every move. Every time you watch him dance, your heart aches—a type of ache that can only be described as how proud you are of your best friend. The passion he emits is almost like the one you were first introduced to by Sunwoo when it came to soccer.
As if he feels your eyes on him, his eyes drift away from his reflection in the mirror towards you. He notices the frown that rests on your eyebrows. “What’s wrong?” A laugh follows his question.
“I cannot get any work done,” you say with a sigh. “I feel like I’m so out of it and it’s still so early in the day.”
Your best friend rolls his eyes as he walks to you. He crouches in front of you and says, “It’s 6 PM; it is not that early. Plus, didn’t you come from a meeting with Kevin?”
You bite the inside of your cheek as you look at him. Painfully aware of your newfound (or pushed down for years) feelings, you cannot help but feel conscious around him at times. Being under his stare made your insides mush together.
“Yeah,” you whisper out. You clear your throat as your eyes look back down at the screen. “It was a weird meeting if I’m going to be honest.”
In your peripheral vision, you can see him tilt his face to the side. You expect him to ask you about it. But when his hands grab onto your laptop, you look up with a frown. “Hey!” He sets it aside before standing up.
With his hand out for you to reach, he says, “Come on, I think you need to take a break.” Your frown remains on your face as you grab onto his hand, tugging on it so that you can stand up. He keeps your hand in his as he drags you to where he was practicing.
The two of you stand in front of a mirror. Once he lets go of your hand, he smiles at you by staring at your reflection. “You know, all the years we’ve been friends and I’ve never seen you dance.” The moment he says this has you almost bolting away. And before you could do so, he grabbed onto your arm.
“Changmin! I am not going to dance in front of you—let alone with you,” you exclaim as the boy keeps you in place. In contrast to your frown, your best friend grins as he moves to stand behind you, his hands now holding onto your forearms.
He peeks from your shoulder and says, “It’ll be fun! And I’ll be guiding you through it.” You only glare at him through the mirror. “C’mon! I won’t judge you at all.”
“Oh, be so for real! I’ve danced in front of Sunwoo before and he couldn’t keep a straight face. What makes you think you won’t laugh?”
He gasps. “See, now you need to let me see you dance!” The whine you let out does not do anything to stop his insistence. “When did you even dance in front of him?”
“I’m pretty sure he walked in on me trying to do a Wonder Girls choreo.” You roll your eyes at the memory. “I am never doing that again.”
“What choreo?” He asks as he sets his chin on your shoulder. “Is it “Tell Me”?” As soon as you nod, he gasps. “That’s easy! I’m sure I can teach you right now.”
“I am not doing that! I’m too shy.”
He chuckles as he raises his chin from your shoulder. “It’s just me—there’s no need to be shy around me.” His words make your knees weak. Something about this moment has you shrinking; his hands on your forearms; the attention on you; the distance between you two.
But something about this shared moment also has your heartstrings tugging; his grin that can light up any room; his playful tone that shows how excited he is; and his determination to get your mind off what is bothering you. You almost cannot help but show a small smile. And with a sigh, you end up nodding at his request.
The two of you spend your time going through the choreography of that song, specifically the pre-chorus and chorus, with Changmin having to show and help you in every move. Although you notice the smile on his lips every time you make an awkward move, he never once burst into laughter—just occasional chuckles. And surprisingly, you enjoyed learning it under his care.
Now, you two sat on the floor. As your best friend takes a break from dancing, your eyes stare into the opened document for one of your classes. Once you attempt to write, you can feel yourself being hit with anxieties that kept you from working in the first place.
You hate being under the spotlight. Most of the time, you find yourself uncomfortable with receiving too much attention. That is why when you found Features writing, it felt perfect for you. The hobby-turned-possible-career keeps you comfortable because you can write about people’s narratives—ones worth sharing with the world. So when you now have to consider representing a staff and being part of the faces of the editorial board, you can feel all eyes on you.
At this point, you are frustrated with your inability to get work done. The sigh you let out as you type away some gibberish has your best friend looking at you with concerned eyes. But before he could say anything, you looked away from your laptop to stare at him. When you see his worried expression, you cannot help but show him a bittersweet smile.
“I don’t know what to do,” you start. Silence settles between you two for a moment, and you realize that he is giving you time to continue. “I–fuck,” you trip over your words. A chuckle leaves your mouth as you turn your head back to face your laptop. You take a moment to breathe, collecting your thoughts.
“Kevin wants me to consider running for the Features editor position.” When you do not hear your best friend interject, you decide to continue. “He actually asked me last year to consider in the case he decides to not renew his position as editor. But now that he’s going to graduate, he brought it up again. He says it would be a good opportunity for me to get a feel of the higher stakes in this field, and that it would help me consider if I will pursue journalism as a career.”
You let out a sigh before taking a look at the boy who sits beside you. “I first told him no. I think I still need to learn more about being a writer, but he says that the growth I seek comes from applying for higher positions.” You bite the inside of your cheek.
“Changmin, I don’t think I’m ready for such responsibilities. You know how much I hate being put under the spotlight, so being an editor would mean I represent my staff and become a face that people link with the publication.” After saying those words, you rip your gaze away from your best friend and stare up at the ceiling. “And what happens if I’m not a good editor to begin with? Being a writer is entirely different from being an editor.”
You feel his hand reach out to yours, holding it and drawing circles at the back of your hand with his thumb. The action makes you close your eyes. Although you do not crave physical touch, something about Changmin doing it to you has you wanting more—maybe it is because you know it as his love language.
“And I think a part of me is scared to become an editor and learning that I hate it after all.” Your eyes open before you turn your head back to him whose eyes are still filled with concern. “Don’t you ever get scared that what you enjoy doing now can be something you grow resentful of?”
When you have gone on with your life with one hobby you have invested so much time in, it seems impossible to ever imagine a future without it. That is what you feel when it comes to writing—a craft that you feel yourself enjoying while still being challenged. But you can almost feel the hands of fear consume you when you imagine the ‘what-ifs’ that come with taking up a position that is different from your usual.
And from how unfamiliar it is, anxiety fills you. Who can say you would be a good editor? What would happen if you fail to keep up with your duties? Is there a reality where you will be burnt out from Features writing?
But when you see your best friend flash you a comforting smile, it feels easier to let such questions go. “Of course, I feel scared,” he starts off. He rips his gaze away from you and stares off into nowhere. “I remember when I first applied for university, choosing a course was the hardest decision for me. I was forced to think of how I wanted my future to turn out because I thought my course dictated the career I ended up in.”
It is true. You remember the first time Changmin was applying to different universities. Without a clear vision of what he wanted to do in the future, he struggled to decide on a list of courses. During that period, you and Sunwoo could only do so much to help him out. But at the end of it all, he appreciates you two for listening to him when he needed it.
“You already know that I had different first-choice courses for the universities I applied for. My list of courses per college was different as well.” He brings your linked hands to his lap and looks down at it. “And I can remember how confused my parents were by that, but I just cared about what I found myself enjoying.” He lets out a sigh before laughing, “I don’t know if it was the smartest decision on my end.”
You cannot help but chuckle along with him. “Even I questioned your decisions,” you admit. Your best friend shakes his head before looking at you. “I think from my perspective, it looked like you didn’t know what to do.”
“Yeah, and I really didn’t,” he tells you. “I mean, the difference between you and me is that while you found yourself set on journalism and just general communication tracks, I was still figuring out what I wanted to do in the future.”
You bite the inside of your cheek as he reveals that to you. It is not like he shared with you new information for you both were aware of it. And it is not your fault that you felt more confident in what the future had in store for you as a 1st-year in high school versus your best friend who is a 3rd-year. The reality is that Changmin was envious of you—you felt so sure of yourself in your hobby. In contrast to you, he could never consider dance as a possible career to pursue.
When he sees the slight shift in your expression, he shows you a small smile. “It’s not your fault. It’s just me being unsure of what I wanted to do.” He takes a moment to recollect his thoughts. “But really, I chose my courses based on how much I enjoyed or found myself interested in them. And I found myself here.” He lets his eyes drift back down to his hand that holds yours.
“Oddly enough, I don’t see myself in any other course. No matter how much I questioned what I was doing in Early Childhood Education, I also found myself entertaining the idea of how nice it would be to explore the careers that come out of it.” He smiles to himself and says, “And I only figured out by my second year that I don’t have to pursue careers like counselor or teacher. I could still do jobs like HR or anything related to science if I wanted to.”
His eyes then drift back towards you. “It will always be a struggle, you know? You’ll never be sure if what you first thought entering university is something you’ll end up pursuing in the end. For me, I came here with an unclear vision of what I wanted to do as a career. And although I still wish I could do photography or dance, I’m actually really happy with being a preschool teacher in the end.”
You cannot help but smile at him. “I’m happy for you. You know that, right?” When the question leaves your mouth, he nods.
“Of course, I do. You never fail to remind me that,” he says. “I may not know where you entirely come from, but I understand the fear. I mean, even I feel like that with dance. But I think all that matters is that I enjoy it now.”
For a moment, silence settles on you two. Your brain is rattled with thoughts of whether or not you are capable of being an editor. But before you can say anything, your best friend interjects. “I think it’s worth giving it a shot, you know? That editor position that Kevin brought up to you.”
You cannot help but show a small frown. “I get that you’re scared to take up the responsibility of being one, but I think the experience really is something else. After all, you’re still in university—it’s the perfect time to take these positions up and explore.” You feel the frown leave your face as he shares that advice. “And you won’t be carrying the burden alone. You have the other editors to rely on.”
He shoots you a smile and says, “You are a talented writer, to begin with—I’m sure that you’ll do great as an editor. After all, I always root for you and your success.” And his words have your heart melting.
Your eyes drift down to your linked hands. Somehow, Changmin knew the ways to comfort you. Although he may not have the answer you seek at all times, he still did his best to listen and connect with you. And every day, you are thankful for him—he eases your anxieties while still building you up.
“Thank you,” you whisper out before looking back up to him. “I think I owe everything to you.”
Your best friend shakes his head and says, “You don’t owe me anything. What are you even saying?” He chuckles as he brings your linked hands closer to him, making you fall on his side. With that, your head rests on his shoulder. “We’re friends—I’d do anything for you willingly.”
The sentence may sound sad, being referred to as a friend by your crush. But the reality is that it fills you with warmth. Because no matter what feelings you harbor for him, the love he shows you is like no other. You can only hope it stays this way.
The weeks have passed since you last had your conversation with Kevin. Somehow, your topic got approved by the rest of the editorial board—it seemed like what you are writing about is relevant after all. Thankfully, you have until the start of editorial board application season to submit the finished opinion piece. You decided against letting your friend group know about your involvement in writing an opinion article just so you could surprise them.
Now, you and Jacob were officially in the last stages of wrapping up your last article with him. It is sad to know that after this, there would be no more pieces to be written with the 5th-year. It is funny to remember how much you wanted to work with him during your first year, so to finally finish up your last article with him is bittersweet.
“I can’t believe this is our last article where our bylines will be beside each other,” you say as you let your eyes drift from your laptop to the boy who sits across from you.
Jacob lets out a half-hearted chuckle. “I know, I can’t believe time has been moving so fast.”
It did feel weird that time suddenly trickles down faster when you find yourself enjoying the moments life presents you. You wish you could control it all—freeze the periods you wish to keep while fast-forwarding ones you hate to go through. But what makes these moments precious is that they do not last forever.
“Have you figured out your opinion piece article?”
You show him a small smile once you add the final touches to the article you two worked on. “Yeah, I’m going to write about my friends.” Jacob cannot help but let out an “awe” at your reveal.
You chuckle before saying, “I have gone through my life not being able to experience the joys of romance in my high school, and it bothered me at first. Back then, I used to think I was undesirable or that I was made only to work.” Then you cannot help but smile to yourself as your eyes drift back down to the laptop screen. “But I think my friends have shown me love greater than what I could ever imagine. I’m okay if I never get to go on multiple dates or bring butterflies to someone’s stomach. Right now, I’m comfortable just where I am.”
As you say those words, your brain cannot help but drift to the thought of Changmin, your best friend whom you love. You would think that such a word is reserved for later stages in a relationship, but the reality is that you always will love him—even if he may remain your best friend.
So you look back up to Jacob and say, “And I think that if life decides to bring that change to me, I’ll gladly accept it.”
The boy who sits across you nods at your words, a small smile on his lips. “Can I ask you something personal?”
You cannot help but frown for a moment. “Sure,” you say as you tilt your head to the side.
“It’s Changmin, right?” Your frown gets deeper, more confused than ever. “He’s the one you love?” As soon as he says those words, your eyes widen.
“How did you figure that out?”
He shakes his head and says, “I think it’s obvious to everyone.” You cannot help but pout at him. “I mean, I can see that Sunwoo and Chanhee have taught you love in their own ways. But I think that Changmin has shown you one that can never be forgotten.”
And your heart cannot help but ache at his words because he is right. In your years growing up, every act that Changmin has done for you is out of genuine care for your wellbeing. No matter all the times he may tease you, he always looks out for you even if you do not ask. At the same time, he supports you in your endeavors even if you may not have experience. And most importantly, he hears you out the most.
Your relationship with him is built out of genuine care for each other. What started as just having a mutual friend turned into workmates and eventually led you two to become friends. And in your years of being friends with him, all he has done is show you love. You may never be able to trace when you two started to cross the boundaries of friendship, but all that matters is that you have each other.
So you whisper out the words, “Yeah, it’s him.” You bite the inside of your cheek. “Is it wrong to be in love with him?” You do not miss the way Jacob frowns. “I mean, I was scared that I was mistaking platonic love for him as a romantic one, you know? You mentioned before how hard it can be to distinguish that.”
His frown leaves his face. As he shakes his head, he shows you a smile. “You know, you two have so much love and care for each other. And funnily enough, there are some romantic relationships I know that do not compare to what I’ve seen between you two.” As he says those words, you feel your heartstrings tug. “I guess the only thing I can ask is this: Is what you feel for Changmin different from what you feel towards Sunwoo and Chanhee?”
It is the same question Sunwoo asked you when you brought it up to him. After your conversations with Chanhee and Kevin (and your ongoing one with Jacob), you expect your answer to change. But the reality is that your answer remains the same. So when you nod, Jacob nods along.
“Then what others say doesn’t matter. At the end of it all, what you two have is special.”
You cannot help but show him a bittersweet smile. It feels almost wrong to share this with him after breaking things off with him. But you like to think that over the weeks, you and Jacob have managed to move past that.
Before you know it, Jacob lets out a sigh. “I think that’s it for this article. We’ve addressed all the comments from the editor-in-chief.” And just like that, you cannot help but feel heartache.
The finale has officially come. You did not want it to end, and the boy who sits across you can see it from your expression. “You know, Y/N, we’re still friends. Just because we aren’t working together means that we have to stop spending time together.” You cannot help but pout. “Plus, you might end up interning at the place I work at—that’s if you still decide to pursue journalism.”
You cannot help but chuckle. “Yeah, that’s true.”
For a moment, silence settles between you two. As you two sit, you cannot help but let your mind drift back to when you first joined the publication. At first glance, you found yourself crushing on Jacob. And after reading his articles, you remember how much you wished to work with him. Oh, how you wish you could tell your past self that most of their dreams came true.
With that, you let out a sigh. “I know I’ve mentioned this before, but I’ve always wanted to work with you. It wasn’t entirely because I had a crush on you but I just loved the articles you put out.”
He shows you that grin—the same one you first found yourself melting at. Now, it is just a sight that you allow yourself to smile at. “I’m really glad I got to work with you. Even if it happened in my last year, I think you’ll be one of my memorable writing partners.” You cannot help but grin back at him. “Even for just some articles, I’m glad we had our bylines beside each other.”
The funny thing is that you are glad that your crush on him sort of brought you closer to him. If it were not for Sunwoo telling your editor about your crush on the 5th-year, you may not have ever received the opportunity to work with him. You learned more about the boy you admired from afar during your time working with him. And somehow, it resulted in him harboring similar feelings towards you. Although you two only got one date from it all, you are glad to still have each other.
A month has passed, and the broadsheets have started circulating in the university. To your surprise, the article you and Jacob worked on women’s sexuality ended up on the cover. You were happy to see that such a narrative would reach many people.
Since you two wrapped up your article on drag queens, there was not enough time to see each other. It was to be expected, of course—the different obligations and schedules prevented you two from hanging out. Nevertheless, you and Jacob would occasionally text each other whether it would be to complain about the progress of your opinion pieces or to share anything new happening on campus.
Talking about opinion pieces, you and Jacob submitted them on time. You two consulted each other non-stop, asking to read each other’s works and make any necessary edits or comments. The works that seemed like absolute garbage during the early stages turned into beautiful emotionally-charged ones. And you were glad that Jacob would trust you to read his piece in its unedited form.
To learn about his struggles to find his place both in Korea and Canada. Despite being born in Canada, he was always faced with racist remarks and microaggressions. So you would think that moving to Korea would give him the liberation of finally finding his place in the world. And yet, his growing up in a Westernized context made it all more difficult for him to connect with his classmates.
Having to be treated as an “outsider” no matter where he goes destroyed him. Like a wall being smashed by a sledgehammer; a glass being smacked off the table and shattering as it hits the ground; a rubber band being pulled until it snaps. For Jacob, having to go through such as a kid can only ruin him.
But in the middle of it all, he met Kevin. Whether it would be in the lunches they shared or talking about nothing, Kevin allowed him to take up space in a world that seemed to not have a spot for him. Whenever the boy found himself in the dark, he knew that all he needed to look for was the moon.
“I’m happy to see your byline on the cover page,” Chanhee says as he looks through the broadsheet. The two of you walk out of a building, slowly making your way to where you parked your car. “I think it might be one of my favorite articles from you and Jacob.”
You cannot help but shoot a smile at your best friend. “Thanks.”
As you two slowly pass by the athletics center, you cannot help but let your stare linger at the building. You knew that Sunwoo and Changmin were practicing for the year-end concert happening three weeks from now all while you were busying yourself with the editor application process.
It feels weird that the school year is coming to an end. Almost a month and a half left and Chanhee and Changmin will graduate while you and Sunwoo go on to the next year. At first, you did feel the anxiety start to bubble within you. What did the future have in store for you four? Would the different priorities rip you guys away?
But the reality is that you will never know, and there will never be a way to find out. And somehow, you cannot help but cherish whatever time you have left with them now. All that matters is that you still have each other now.
“Hey, I need to go to the dance studio.” You whip your head from the building to your best friend. “I said I could lend a hand in filming and taking pictures for documentary purposes,” he says with a small smile.
You shake your head and say, “It’s okay.” Your eyes look at the broadsheet Chanhee still holds. “I should say this now but you should check out the opinions section.”
With furrowed eyebrows, he flips through the pages until he reaches that portion. His eyes skim through the page until it lands on your byline. And just like that, you notice his expression shift into one of shock. “Oh my god, you ended up putting out an opinion piece?! I thought you decided against it,” he exclaims.
You show him a small smile despite his eyes still trained on the paper. “I decided against telling you and the others. I wanted to surprise you since it’s about you three.” As soon as you reveal that, you notice the way Chanhee pouts as he continues to read your article. “Oh my god, don’t read it in front of me!”
Chanhee giggles as he lets his eyes finally meet yours. “Did you know that this might be the sweetest thing anyone has done for me?”
“I know, it’s me after all,” you joke as you shrug your shoulders. And just like that, he cannot help but glare at you.
“This was supposed to be a sweet moment but you always seem to ruin it with your stupid comments.”
You let out a laugh as you smack your best friend’s arm. “I know, but I hope you enjoy reading it.”
His glare shifts back to a look full of adoration. And with that, he says, “I know that we always tell you that we’ll love whatever you write about, but this one might be my favorite. I can’t believe you think we’re worthy enough to be written about.” He wraps his arm around your shoulder and brings you into a side hug. “I’m excited to read it.”
You wrap your arm around his waist in an attempt to reciprocate the action. “I would write thousands of stories about you guys. I hope you know that.”
If you were given only one topic to forever write about, you would not hesitate to pick your friend group. The reality is that there may not be enough words to truly describe how much love you have for them, but you can only hope that the stories that people have the privilege of reading will show them a love that is unlike any other.
“Okay,” you say as you unwrap your arm from his waist while he does the same from your shoulders. “I’ll see you sometime.”
As you shoot him a grin, Chanhee cannot help but smile back. “Yeah, get home safe, okay? I’ll make sure that we read it by tonight.”
You wave him goodbye before turning around and walking away. As you take your steps leading to the car, you cannot help but feel anxiety slowly bubble within you. Maybe your words would reach out to that one best friend—you can only hope he can read between the lines.
It is 8:34 PM. To Changmin’s surprise, practice ended earlier than expected. Almost everyone has left the dance studio, leaving him and his two best friends. The two were reading the broadsheet as they waited for him to get ready to go home. He got a copy as soon as he saw the stands filled with them.
The sight of your byline on the cover page warmed his heart—he wished he could tell you how proud he is of you in person, but your different schedules prevented him from doing so. Although he knew he could shoot you a message or ring you up, he wanted to hug you and tell you face-to-face.
He wipes away his sweat with a towel that hangs around his neck. As he makes his way to where his two friends sit to grab his jug, he does not miss the way their mouths part open with eyes filled with adoration. He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. “What are you guys reading?” Their eyes snap towards him.
“You need to read this,” Sunwoo finally speaks up as he hands him the broadsheet. Changmin cannot help but still keep his eyebrows furrowed. Once he lets his eyes drift down to the paper, he notices that it is opened to the opinions section. He remains confused as his eyes skim through. That is until he spots your byline.
Followed by the title “Linked arms and bruised hearts,” your byline is positioned below it. His best friends do not miss the way his eyebrows shoot up. All this time, he was under the impression that you did not end up pushing through with writing an opinion piece, so to see that you have written two and a half columns worth had him surprised.
“Did you guys know they wrote an opinion piece?” He asks as his eyes snap back to Chanhee and Sunwoo. As the two shake their heads, he looks back at the broadsheet. He slowly takes a seat on the floor as his eyes remain on your article.
Linked arms and bruised heartsBy Y/N
Meet-cutes; love letters; playlists filled with romantic songs—that is all I know about love. Growing up, all the media I’ve surrounded myself with has shown me what love should be. Movies have taught me that love is grand confessions in front of a crowd of strangers while music has shown that it all comes from throwing stones at windows late at night. And the novels I’ve read are filled with poetic words that you would never hear in casual conversations.
With these media surrounding romance, I was fed with supposed “realistic” scenarios; bumping against someone in hallways and grazing hands with them as they help you pick up items that have dropped to the ground; spilling coffee on someone’s shirt and promising to make up for it through a date; being approached by someone in a bookstore who passionately talks about the book you picked up.
Aside from these storylines, I found my heart in the hands of fictional main leads who utter words of never-ending love. Their flirtatious remarks never fail to make me scream into pillows or cause butterflies to swarm my stomach.
I enjoyed it all because the feeling I got from consuming these brought the utmost joy into my fickle life. Unbeknownst to me, I never knew the consequences that came from these—especially for someone who has never experienced romantic love firsthand.
Never receiving love notes or being asked out on dates took a toll on how I perceived myself. While everyone gets to receive chocolates and flowers, I was left to imagine such a feeling through every possible form of media I can consume. At first, I told myself that I would have my moment—all it takes is time. But further down the long journey, I started to believe that I was put into this world to never experience it.
Having to think I was undesirable at the early stages of my teenage years made me believe that love is a privilege—something that not everyone can receive. The more I let such a mentality persist, the more I started to believe that my only role on Earth was work. With that, I believed that my future would have me waking up to work and going to sleep exhausted—all by myself.
That is until I met three boys who seemingly changed the trajectory of how my future would play out.
Funnily enough, I knew these three during my time chasing romance. These best friends of mine were some of the many to experience the love I desperately craved. You would think that I would hate being stuck in that position—that I would resent them for easily receiving something I longed for. But oddly enough, I was happy to bear witness to all their adventures because they showed me love I have never seen in movies.
As others give chocolates on Valentine’s Day, they would bring me home-cooked meals for no particular occasion. While people received “just because” flowers, I got “just because” playlists for they knew I would cherish them more. But these are only actions that cannot truly capture what they have shown me during the years I never knew of romantic love.
In our friend group, to love is to reestablish one’s independence—each person deserves to take up space in the world. And somehow, these three spent their time building me back up without me noticing. From my perception of being undesirable, I only started to learn how to be comfortable in my skin through the support they continued to shower me with.
Before I knew it, I found myself content with my uneventful love life. At one point, I stopped chasing the romance that artists sing of. It was only later on learned that love spoken of in the media is not always romantic; it can be platonic as well.
The love found in our friendships is not meant to be treated as second to the romantic one we seek. If anything, what we receive in our friendships shows us enough of what love overall should be; understanding of boundaries; shoulders to lean on at any time; and support even if you never ask.
I eventually found myself in a position where I could comfortably say that I was okay with my lackluster love life. The only reason I can say this is because my friends have shown me so much love that I do not need to seek it in other avenues.
I hope that when they read this, they know that I am forever indebted to them. Knowing them, they would say that this is all the bare minimum—that they would do it all without any question. But for someone whose understanding of love was skewered by media, my bruised heart has slowly healed through the care they have shown me throughout the years,
I hope that my future will always have them in it for I can never imagine a world without them. They are the reason why I know of love now—a reason why I choose to keep on going. And I now know that love is not an idea that the media monetizes off of. I exist in a reality where I got to meet my best friends—that is how I know love is real.
I used to think I would forever remain clueless about love, but the reality is that I actually know of it all now. Linking arms as you walk to nowhere; picnic dates in the middle of winter; agreements of sticking together past the age of 30—that is everything I know about love.
Changmin cannot help but feel his mouth part open as he reads your words. His heartstrings tug at your words. To learn that the reason you know of love is due to your group of four made him realize how much he does love you—and not just the platonic form.
For you, he would act as the arms that you can go back to at the end of the day; he would be your morning alarm and make sure you get out of bed in time; he would be everything you need and want because he loves you.
As soon as his eyes move back to his two best friends who can only smile, he realizes that your opinion piece is not only a commemoration of the love you receive from him, Chanhee, and Sunwoo. Rather, it is your way of finally sharing your feelings—ones that you were too afraid to tell him face-to-face.
“I have to go,” he whispers before handing back the broadsheet to the two.
Once he grabs his stuff, he dashes out of the dance studio, leaving Chanhee and Sunwoo all alone. “You think Y/N will have the guts to say it themselves?” Chanhee decides to ask the boy who sits beside him.
For Sunwoo, he would say you could never admit such feelings to your crush. That is why it is a miracle that Jacob was forward with you. But with Changmin, he cannot help but smile to himself.
“Yeah,” he voices out. “If they had the guts to write something like this, then I’m sure they want something with him after all.”
Your place feels duller than usual; the lights look dimmer; the pictures on the wall look less saturated; the air forms goosebumps all over your skin. As you sit in your kitchen with leftover bibimbap from yesterday, you stare at your phone as you eat away at the sad meal. It is not that it tastes bad, but something is preventing you from enjoying the food in front of you.
Hours have passed since you last saw Chanhee. Around this time, Sunwoo and Changmin might be finishing up their practice. The thing is you expect to receive a message at least from one of the three. Yet, your phone remains silent—no notification from them whatsoever.
At this point, you can feel the anxiety start to eat you away—it takes its time to nibble each limb of yours while you do nothing to stop it. There is no way to cease it, though. All you can do is sit and let it do its work. You can only hope that some sign from the universe would do something to keep it at bay.
And just like that, the doorbell rings.
With your mouth full of rice, beef, and stir-fried vegetables, you get off your seat and walk to the door. You take a peek into the peephole only to see the one guy you were terrified to be face-to-face with. You almost think to not open the door; maybe he will give up on waiting and walk away. But when his eyes trail from the floor to stare directly through the peephole, you freeze.
“Y/N? Can we talk?” He asks, almost like he knows you stand at the other side of the door. You wish you could do anything but just stand still. “I want to talk because I think I won’t be able to sleep well tonight if I don’t. But if you don’t want to have that conversation right now, I can wait another day.”
Your heart warms at his words. Even in a moment like this, he still cares about your comfort. Regardless of what you revealed in your opinion piece, he would willingly deal with restless nights if it meant giving you time to muster enough courage to talk about the elephant in the room. But the reality is that waiting for any other day will prolong your suffering.
When you notice Changmin slowly move away from the door, you quickly swing the door open. There he stands with eyes wide from the sudden action. As you swallow down the food in your mouth, you also swallow down your fears. You find yourself taking steps back, eyes still on him as he leaves his shoes outside before entering your place. He shuts the door behind him before dropping everything he carries to the floor but one thing—the broadsheet.
For a moment, you two stand still with no sound leaving any of your mouths. You almost think that you need to start the conversation, but the silence makes it all too difficult to speak.
“Y/N,” he calls out your name at first. You do not miss how his eyes are filled with wonder—one that resembles hope in the face of trouble. “I read it, and I loved it. I love knowing that Sunwoo, Chanhee, and I have shown you all of these.” Then his eyes trail back down to the paper he holds. “But I need to know if there’s something in between the lines or if it’s just me hoping for nothing.”
The way he stands in front of you is more vulnerable than ever, more than when he first approached you when he lost his competition. His shoulders are slumped in anxiety as he continues to look at the broadsheet that is opened to your opinion piece. And as your mouth opens in an attempt to speak, he looks back at you.
Under his stare, you know there is nothing you should worry about. But the reality is that sharing the most intimate parts of yourself with someone will always be difficult—confessing to your best friend will never be as easy as you hope for it to be.
Your mouth snaps close. As you look down to the ground, you bite the inside of your cheek as you think over the right words to say. Your brain rattles for a moment as you try to make a script on the spot. But you realize there is not enough time in the world to figure out what to tell him. And there will never be enough words to capture what you feel towards the boy who stands across from you.
“I used to think I would never have the privilege of receiving love,” you start. “You’ve read about it in that piece that’s in your hands, but it’s only a surface level of all my fears.”
Your eyes now look back up to him. His expression never falters, but it remains as fearful as yours. “I thought I was destined with a lonely future, that the reason why I was never asked out on dates or been confessed to is because there will never be space for another person in my life. So when Jacob started to show some interest in me, I thought it was the universe playing tricks on me.”
You find yourself letting out a small chuckle as you shift your weight from your left foot to the right. “I mean, you’re the one person who knows it the most. I told you that one night in the convenience store and that one time during the winter break.”
“And for a period, I thought that I was comfortable with occasional crushes because I didn’t have to commit to anything. I started to think that uncertainty was my way of sabotaging everything good coming my way, but I realized that it stemmed from my inexperience with love overall.”
You take a deep breath before saying, “But when I saw Hanhee and Byungho that one night where they were cuddling, I realized how nice it would be to just have someone to go back to at the end of a long day—to have a home in a form of a person.” You do not miss the way his eyes slowly start to fill with an emotion you cannot recognize.
“So I thought about who I would love to still see when I’m working, and I can only think about you three. I always find myself wishing that time will treat us well. I want us to remain together no matter what stage we are in our lives. And never once will I ever find myself trading our group for anything else—even for a shot in romance.” As you say those words, you notice a small smile that forms on his lips.
Because it is true—why would you trade years of genuine love and care for something that you do not know about? Why would you give up something so pure for something uncertain? And you know that love for others means taking risks, whether calculated or out of genuine impulse. And you would never consider yourself a risk taker. But you find yourself making an exception to do it just this once—one for your best friend.
“I love Sunwoo and Chanhee more than anything in the world,” you say. And now, you find yourself more scared than ever to admit the next sentence. You can hear your heartbeat out of your chest as you two stand in silence. But even if the boy across from you is dying to hear the next words, he never pushes you to say it if you are not ready.
You cannot help but smile at him. “But with you, Changmin,” you manage to choke out despite the anxiety that bubbles within you. “I wish that you will continue to link arms with me because I have found myself growing fond of it; I want you to continue accompanying me as we work on different tasks; I hope that after every day, whether boring or tiring, I can go back to you.”
And with your next words, he cannot help but feel all resolve crumble. “I think that you are the home I want to go back to.” You let your eyes flicker back down to the paper that he holds. “I found myself hoping that we’re both single when I turn 30 just so that I have more of an excuse to want you in my home.”
“And even though I have learned of love through you three, I want to experience the one I desire with you.” You let yourself smile as you look back up to him. “I hope that you will reserve enough love just for me as I already have for you.”
The next thing you know, Changmin drops the broadsheet to the ground. As he makes his way closer to you, you can feel your heart beat out of your chest. The distance between you two grows smaller. And when his face is inches away from yours, your breath hitches.
You notice the moles found on his face—one under his lip and another that rests on the bridge of his nose. His hair is a little messy from practice, with some strands slightly up. And his eyes are now filled with an emotion you cannot figure out.
You want to beg him to say something—anything, really. But when his hands reach out to grab hold of your face, all thoughts are knocked out.
His eyes flicker down to your lips before going back right to your eyes. “I will always want to be that home for you,” he whispers. “I always saw you as a place of solace for me, but I hope I can become that for you forever.” And he smiles at you before saying, “I have so much love stored in me that's made just for you.”
Before you know it, you find yourself closing the distance between you two. With eyes closed, you place your lips on his. The kiss is everything comforting and vulnerable—almost like how you would describe your relationship with him. His hands remain holding your face, his thumb occasionally sweeping across your cheek.
The warmth that fills your body is like no other—as if the sun has emerged within you. His hands on your cheeks remind you of all the seasons you have spent with him. Whether in summer or winter, he will always hold you because he loves you. And it is only starting to sink that he does love you—that he has so much love within him just to give to you.
He does not attempt to deepen it, fully aware that all of these are foreign waters. So when you find yourself parting from the kiss in an attempt to catch your breath, his eyes are full of concern.
He is about to ask you something until you beat him to it. “Was that right?” As you whisper the question out, he cannot help but feel his heartstrings tug. He finds himself smiling while your eyes remain wide with curiosity. “Oh god, I just realized I kissed you without brushing my teeth!” Your exclaim does nothing but make him laugh.
“Don’t worry about what’s right. Just let me take the lead,” he says. “And I’d kiss you anytime, even after you’ve eaten or brushed your teeth.” You cannot help but smile, a giggle leaving your mouth.
The thing about Changmin is that he knows you inside out, from how you worry about everything to your fear of being vulnerable in front of anyone. But he knows how to support you—to tell you when to rest and to build a space where you do not have to be afraid to share your deepest sentiments.
Although the love you two first shared came from a place of platonic nature, it slowly shifted without you two noticing. And while everyone seemed to comment that what you two have seems to teeter between the boundary of platonic and romance, you never allowed their words to truly sway what you thought about your relationship. To you and Changmin, all that matters is what you decide on.
Your home is livelier than ever; the lights shine brighter than usual; the pictures on the wall are full of color; you find yourself warm despite the cold air. As soon as his arms wrap around you, you can feel your heart soar to heights that have never been imagined. You allow yourself to snuggle closer to him, having your face rest in the crook between his neck and shoulder. All that can be said is that you both are happy. You love each other—both platonically and romantically.
“When does this graduation end?” Sunwoo complains beside you as he lets himself melt in the chair. “If I knew this would take forever, I would have eaten something heavy for breakfast.”
You roll your eyes. “Everyone told you it would take long. That’s on you now.”
The boy scowls at you before saying, “Yeah, yeah. You’re only not complaining because you get to see your stupid boyfriend on stage.” You gasp as he says those words. “I said what I said!”
“That boyfriend you’re referring to is your best friend, by the way! And we’re here to support our other friends.”
“Yeah, no one cares. Don’t forget that I was your best friend first, so you need to take my side if we end up fighting.” From his response, you roll your eyes. You knew that Sunwoo was only joking around, saying nonsense just to pass the time.
It is 3:23 PM, and you two are seated by the bleachers as you wait for the graduation ceremony to end. From the people graduating, you two were able to recognize many faces that you would have to say goodbye to—Juyeon to name a memorable face.
“I’m just saying that I can’t believe they won’t let us sit with the Ji family. I mean, we’re practically part of them! And since you’re dating him, you’re basically an in-law.” Sunwoo’s attempt to justify his disbelief towards the situation has you chuckling.
Before you can comment, the person who stands by the lectern announces a familiar name. “Choi Chanhee; bachelor of arts degree in Photography; Magna Cum Laude.” As your best friend makes his way to the middle of the stage, you and Sunwoo get off your seats.
“Go, Chanhee!” You find yourself cheering as loud as you can.
“Chanhee-ah, you’re so cool!” The boy beside you shouts out loud in an attempt to embarrass your best friend (while embarrassing you both in the process). You notice Chanhee’s attempts to hold back his laugh as he grabs his diploma. He clearly heard your cheers all the way from the bleachers.
Once he bowed and made his way off the stage, you and Sunwoo fell back down to your seats. “Well, we succeeded in embarrassing Chanhee,” you say, which earns a laugh from your best friend.
You let out a sigh before going back to the topic. “I am not an in-law. I mean, Changmin and I only became official like a month and a half ago!” When you look at your best friend, he only stares at you in disbelief.
“Y/N, his family loves you—always have and always will. I think they’re just waiting for him to put a ring on your finger.” You laugh in disbelief.
“Moon Hyungseo; bachelor of arts degree in Psychology; renowned Features editor for two academic years; Magna Cum Laude.” With that, your conversation gets cut short. As your old editor makes his appearance, you two get off your seats and cheer him on.
“Go, Kevin hyung!” Sunwoo cheers beside you. Although Kevin may not be able to hear you guys, you know that he would still appreciate your cheers. As soon as he makes his way off the stage, you two fall back down to your chairs.
You look at your best friend and say, “Again, I just started dating Changmin. We haven’t discussed marriage at all because we are too young to begin with.” You go back to looking at the stage as more unfamiliar faces get their diplomas. “A lot of this is still new to me, you know? So I still find myself kind of nervous about this whole setup.”
The boy beside you hums. “I mean, it’s valid for you to be nervous. You two were friends before officially being together. And I know it’s still new for you, but it is for him also.” You cannot help but look back at him. “I mean, he’s only gone on dates and had one relationship back in high school. I’m sure he’s just as nervous as you are.” Your attention goes back to the stage.
Sunwoo is right—you and Changmin barely had enough knowledge of what comes out of a romantic relationship, but both of you can recognize that your dynamic did slightly change. Most actions that you two did while you were still friends remained; linking arms; occasional banter; and sitting in comfortable silence.
However, with the new nature of your relationship, you started to notice that your boyfriend has gone out of his way to spend more time with you whenever possible. Aside from that, he would buy you two meals to share for every dinner, making sure that you ate the right amount of food. Of course, you would find yourself kissing him more—sometimes leading to more heated make-out sessions thanks to him. But for the most part, you were happy with what you have with him now.
Before you can say anything, the emcee calls out, “Jacob Bae; bachelor of arts degree in Korean Language and Literature; Summa Cum Laude.” The two of you two stand up once more from your seats. As you watch Jacob make his way to the dean, you cannot help but cheer him on as he grabs his diploma.
“Go, Jacob!” Your shout is loud, reaching its way to the boy who is on stage. He scans the crowd until his eyes land on you and Sunwoo. At the sight of you two clapping, he cannot help but smile back before bowing and making his way off the stage.
Once you two sit back down, you cannot help but let out a small sigh. “I think it’s still surreal that I’m with Changmin, you know?” You voice out your concerns to your best friend. “I mean, I never once imagined myself being with my best friend.”
In your peripheral vision, you see the way Sunwoo nods. “I still can’t believe my two childhood besties are together. Like, you’re going to make me third-wheel every time Chanhee is not with us.” You roll your eyes as you smack his arm. He lets out a chuckle at your reaction. “But if I’m going to be honest, I’m glad that you two have each other.”
You smile at his words as your eyes remain on the stage. “Lee Jaehyun; bachelor of arts degree in Archaeology; Magna Cum Laude.” As soon as the emcee calls out the name, you spot Hyunjae making his way to the middle of the stage. You and Sunwoo get off your seats to cheer him on, but you cannot help but remember your conversation with Chanhee.
“Yeah, Hyunjae hyung and I are just friends,” Chanhee says as he scrolls through the photos on his camera.
Your friend group is seated by your hideout. While Chanhee assesses his photos, Sunwoo is busy animating his final project. You are also writing one of your final papers for class all while Changmin is adding some final edits to his thesis paper. Although you two were working, your boyfriend could not help but keep his hand on your thigh—not in an attempt to arouse you but just to hold you out of pure comfort.
“Really? How come?” You decide to ask as you rip your eyes away from the screen.
Chanhee looks away from his camera to look at you. “I’ve mentioned this already to Changmin, but I think we’re just friends. We did like each other at first, but the dates we went on made us realize that maybe it’s better to keep it platonic.” You only hum as you stare at the boy who sits across from you. “Hyunjae also admitted that he still has something complicated with his ex.”
Sunwoo clicks his tongue. “Kim Younghoon, right? The culinary student?” Chanhee nods at his words. “Yeah, I think I heard about that before. I didn’t know they would get back together.”
Chanhee can only shrug. “I mean, I don’t know what will happen between the two. And if Hyunjae and I ever decide to revisit the idea of dating, I wouldn’t be opposed to it,” he finds himself admitting. “But now, I’m okay with where I am now. I’m happy with the love I receive from you guys.” As he says those words, you cannot help but smile. You knew he was referencing your opinion piece.
“Honestly, me too,” Sunwoo chimes in with eyes remaining on his tablet as he draws away. “I hate to flatter Y/N once more, but I think that opinion piece did make me realize how okay I am with being single. And it’s not like I’ll give up on romantic love entirely, but I’m comfortable waiting it out.”
You pout at your best friend’s words before saying, “Thanks guys, I mean it.”
“Of course, it means a lot that you wrote about us. Even if it was your attempt to confess to Changmin, we’ll still take it,” Chanhee says, only making your boyfriend giggle. “How ironic that you talked about being okay with platonic love while your main goal was to get with Changmin after all.” You know your best friend says it sarcastically, but you want to be clear with your point.
“Hey! The main goal of the piece was really to talk about how fulfilled I feel from the love that comes from you guys. Aren’t you guys happy that I don’t use romantic love as my basis for self-worth anymore?”
“Of course we’re happy. I mean, that’s all we want for you,” Changmin says as he looks at you. “We never wanted you to think you’re worth any less just because you never got love notes or chocolates from admirers.” He takes a look at his two other best friends. “I think we all had this silent agreement to help in rebuilding your self-esteem. I think all of us wanted to make sure that everyone can be comfortable independently while still having shoulders to lean on for support.”
As he says those words, you cannot help but nod along with him. In your group, the one thing you all care about the most is boosting each other’s self-esteem. The reality is that it is hard to reestablish that sense of independence and self-worth all by yourself. That is why friends play an important role as they support you, whether through cheering you on in certain endeavors or just in general reassurance.
“Yeah, I think that I never really found myself being confident in my skills in photography and video editing until I met you three. I mean, it pushed me to make that documentary for the K-Pop student idols coverage,” Chanhee says with a smile. “Thank you for bringing me to your group.”
Sunwoo smiles at his best friend who sits beside him and says, “I don’t know if we ever told you, but our group never felt complete until you came into the picture. You helped to get that ball rolling—finding ways to help us find happiness in being independent. And along the journey, you reminded us of the importance of leaning on each other.” You notice the way Chanhee pouts at his words. “I hope you know how much we appreciate you for looking out for us.”
Before you know it, tears stream down Chanhee’s cheeks. “Guys, I can’t believe you’re making me cry right now.” You and Changmin stand up from your seats, grabbing onto your boyfriend’s hand as you two make your way to the other side of the picnic table. Sunwoo has already scooted closer to Chanhee, wrapping his arm around his shoulders. With that, you and Changmin hug your best friend who cannot help but cry from all the love he receives.
“I love you, Chanhee,” you whisper into his hair. You let your chin rest on his head as you look at Sunwoo and Changmin. “And I love you both. Thank you for teaching me what it means to love and to be loved.”
You cannot help but smile at the memory. The love felt in your friend group never fails to tug on your heartstrings. The reality is that you were lucky to have them—not everyone has the privilege of being friends with the three. Although you like to call them your demons who never fail to rile you up or press your buttons, you know that the love they shower you with will be greater than whatever anyone can show you.
As soon as Hyunjae makes his way off the stage, you and Sunwoo go back to sitting down. “Do you think Changmin and I will end up like Chanhee and Hyunjae?” You decide to finally ask. A part of you fears that what you two have is a mistake—that you both mistook whatever feelings you harbor for each other.
But Sunwoo always finds a way to reassure you while telling you the truth. “We’ll never know for sure because only time can tell what’s in store for you two.” You find yourself nodding at his words. “But for me, I think what you have with Changmin is special. I don’t think anything can compare to what you two have.”
You find yourself smiling at his words before looking at him. “I love you, Sunwoo. You know that, right?” He looks back at you with a small smile before nodding.
“I love you, too. I have always known that since our first days being seatmates in grade school. I knew that the universe brought us together for a reason, and I’m glad that I will always have you in my life.” From his words, you cannot help but lean your head on his shoulder. As he wraps his arm around your shoulders, you watch more unfamiliar faces come and go.
As soon as many unfamiliar students grabbed their diplomas, you notice that they have finally started to call students with special awards. And the emcee’s next words make you smile. “Now, to formally award the student with the most outstanding graduate thesis, we hereby present Ji Changmin; bachelor of science degree in Early Childhood Education; Summa Cum Laude.” As soon as they call out your boyfriend’s name, you and Sunwoo immediately get off your seats and cheer your hearts out.
The sight of Changmin walking up to the middle of the stage with a smile pulls at your heartstrings—you are proud of everything that he does. He always finds ways to continuously prove himself, and you hope he knows that everyone recognizes his efforts. And more than that, you hope that he sees that these achievements are only a fraction of who he is. Changmin is more than just awards—he is everything good found in this world.
“Changmin-ah! I love you!” You find yourself shouting out loud. Despite wanting to stay out of the spotlight on most occasions, there is no sense of shame within you as you cheer those words out. You want the world to know that you would gladly be under the light if it meant showing your support for the boy who you love.
Your shout is loud as it reaches all the way to Changmin. His eyes flicker towards you, and his smile gets bigger at the sight of you. He raises his pinky out towards you—a promise that all he does will be for you and himself. And you find yourself doing the same, promising him that all you want is for both of you to succeed with each other’s support.
“I can’t believe it’s only going to be me and Sunwoo.” The four of you are by your hideout, sitting on the picnic table for one last time as a complete group. You find yourself leaning your head on Changmin’s shoulder with arms still linked with each other. “I can’t keep being stuck with that loser!” Your eyes rest on the boy you have known for more than twelve years.
Sunwoo glares at you. “Yah! You think I like being stuck with you?” As you two make faces at each other, you can feel Changmin’s shoulders shake from his chuckle.
“Did you bring the multi-tool?” Chanhee finally asks his best friend who sits beside him. Once Sunwoo hands it to him, he smiles at you three. “What shall we carve on this little table of ours?”
“Why don’t you just carve our initials? It’s simple,” you suggest, only to earn groans from a particular someone you seem to be stuck with.
“Boring! Think of something fun, you know?” Sunwoo’s response only has you rolling your eyes. “What about a diamond? You know, because it has four sides and we’re four people.”
Chanhee cannot help but scowl at him. “Even worse than what Y/N suggested.” Sunwoo only frowns at him. “What about you, Changmin? Any ideas?”
For a moment, he hums as he thinks of anything possible to carve. You almost start to think he has no suggestions with how long his hum lasts. That is until he suggests a symbol perfect to describe your four.
“What about a bandaged heart? You know, we all have bruised hearts from what life decides to bring our way, but we keep on going because we have each other.” Your boyfriend’s suggestion makes you three smile.
“Ah, you stole that from Y/N’s opinion piece,” Chanhee playfully scolds Changmin. But he finds himself nodding before saying, “But I think it does perfectly describe us.”
As he slowly starts to carve out the symbol, Sunwoo decides to speak up. “I was thinking we can drag Eric to join us here if you don’t mind?” The question is more directed towards you, making you hum in agreement. “He has this other friend who I think you’ll get along with. His name is Haknyeon.” You find yourself smiling at your best friend’s words.
“I’m down for that,” you say before lifting your head off your boyfriend’s shoulder. “I mean, as long as you’re there, I don’t mind.”
As you admit that to Sunwoo, he cannot help but smile back. However, he quickly covers it up by saying, “Ugh, so obsessed with me! Changmin, how do you deal with Y/N?” You gasp at your best friend’s words. What is even worse is that your boyfriend says nothing to defend you, only laughs along.
“Yah! Ji Changmin! How could you let him say that?!” Despite your complaints, he wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you close to him, smothering your left cheek with kisses. The sight makes Sunwoo and Chanhee roll their eyes, but everyone is happy to see the new shift in the relationship.
Once Chanhee finishes carving out a beautiful image of a bandaged heart, everyone cannot help but smile at the sight. The lines of the heart are a little jagged—not very neat but it is clear to see that it is a heart. The bandage on it, however, is nice and clean. You cannot help but think the symbol is perfect to capture your friend group.
Although the bandaged heart may look a little rough, the idea still lives forever on this picnic table that became a getaway for your group. This place has witnessed all the laughs and tears you can ever recall in your college life. You hope that the next group of friends that stumble upon this spot will find solace the same way you four did.
Sunwoo shoots a look at Chanhee before saying, “Come on, let’s leave these two lovebirds to do whatever shit they need to do.” As soon as he stands up, Chanhee follows him. But before they decide to leave you two, Sunwoo says, “Please do not have sex on the table.”
You find yourself reeling at your best friend’s words. “Yah! Who do you think we are?”
Your two best friends look at each other before their eyes land back on you and Changmin. “We’re just saying that your boyfriend is quite scandalous.” Once you look at your boyfriend, you notice the frown on his face that is accompanied by cheeks that are dusted pink from what his friends revealed.
“And we’re off!” Chanheee exclaims. Just like that, your two best friends make their way out of the hideout, leaving you and your boyfriend all alone.
Although Changmin has his arm wrapped around your waist, you cannot help but shoot him a look of suspicion. “So, what type of kinks have you not revealed to me? I thought we knew everything about each other?” Your boyfriend rolls his eyes before placing another kiss on your cheek.
“That conversation is for another day,” he whispers with a smile. You only roll your eyes at his attempt to change the topic. He then says, “I want you to tell me about your plans for next year.” And with that, you show him a small smile before going on a tangent on what you have in store for the Features staff.
Around a month ago, you received news that you would take over as the Features editor. The day you got the news happened to land on the same day as Sunwoo’s and Changmin’s year-end concert. Your boyfriend was recognized for his beautifully crafted choreographies, and you remember how happy you were to see the standing ovations he received. So when you told him during dinner that you’ll be the incoming Features editor, you remember the joy that took over his face. It was one for the books—the day brought only good news.
A few days after the year-end concert, Kevin held one last meeting with the Features staff as a whole. It happened over lunch in the restaurant of Mr. Lim’s, the same owner whom you interviewed for the small business coverage. The food was to die for; the sour taste of the Kimchinigang, a pork stew that is mixed with vegetables and kimchi; the savory taste of the Beef Pares jajangmyeon, a black bean noodle dish accompanied with braised beef; and the sweet taste of turon hotteok, a banana-filled pancake.
Everything about that lunch felt comforting, from the food to the people you were with. You wish you could have frozen that moment—make time stand still even for a few minutes longer. But of course, moments like these always come to an end. It feels bittersweet to recall.
“Do you think you can pass me some soup?” Yunjin asks from beside you while she hands her bowl to you, eyes staring at the spicy pork stew. As soon as you pour enough soup with pieces of pork and vegetables, she signals you to stop.
You pass her the bowl with a smile and ask, “So, will I see you next year?”
She smiles at you. “Of course, I like it here.” She looks around the table to see that the staff is finishing up their meals. “I think I’m just going to miss a lot of people, but,” her eyes then land on you. “I’ll still be with you.”
Your heart warms at her words. The grin on your face is something that cannot be wiped. “I don’t know how I’ll be able to do this editor shit, so I’m glad I’ll at least have some familiar faces.”
Yunjin cannot help but nudge your side before taking a sip of her soup. “You’re not alone. I mean, me and Chaeyeon unnie will be here.” You let your eyes lie on the girl Yunjin sits across from, seeing that she is in the middle of a conversation with Seungcheol.
“Yeah,” you say as you smile to yourself.
Before you can say anymore, you feel the person on your other side nudging you. You roll your eyes before looking at the boy who seemingly interrupted your thoughts. “And what do you want from me, Mr. Bae?”
Jacob chuckles as he takes one more bite of the pancake. “Are you ready for Kevin’s speech?” You cannot help but furrow your eyebrows in confusion. “You think Kevin would end his term as an editor without some parting words?”
Before you can share your thoughts, you notice your editor get off his seat with a glass filled with some unknown cocktail in his hand. Everyone snaps out of their conversation as they stare at the boy who clears his throat.
“I think that it’s only right to say something before officially ending my term as your editor,” he starts off. His eyes scan over the people who stay seated, a smile on his lips. “I’ve been the Features editor for two years—some of you guys I worked with for those two entire years while others only one.”
“I have to admit that being an editor is not easy,” he chuckles. “I mean, there were so many times where I even questioned why I ended up becoming one because I thought I wasn’t the right person for the job.”
He bites on his bottom lip as he thinks over the next words to be said. “I used to think that being an editor would be a lonely and pressuring job—one that would have me always act quickly if any issue arises or think quickly to handle all the concerns that may be brought to my attention. And to be fair, it is that, but it’s only the surface of what it means to be an editor.”
“I learned in my two years that I am not just someone who will just guide you throughout all your stay in the publication—I grow with you in the same way you grow as a writer.” His words tug on your heartstrings. Your eyes are now wide due to his moving words.
“I want to thank you all for letting me work with you. It’s been my pleasure to read your pitches and stories that bring change to the community. But I also want to say that it’s been such an honor to get to know you all not only as writers but as individuals.” He takes a moment to breathe. “I have witnessed growth happen to each one of you, and I'm glad I became someone you guys can rely on. Thank you for choosing Features.”
His eyes then land on you, and he flashes you a smile. “Y/N, I know the process of deliberating and accomplishing the application was a difficult one. But I want to tell you how proud I am of you.” You can feel your lips quiver at his words. “I’m glad to hand over my position to you officially.”
Before you know it, Kevin makes his way towards you, finding his spot behind you as he rests his hand on your shoulder. As he rubs your shoulder, he brings his mouth close to your ear only for you to hear. And he whispers, “I still mean what I said then.”
His last sentence is a nod to the individual consultation you had with him regarding the position and your opinion piece. That one statement reminds you that he still thinks you are destined for greatness, and you cannot help but feel heartache. You will never find yourself forgetting the time Kevin spent to foster a space of care and growth not only for you but for the rest of your staff.
And you realize at that moment that you are now passed on with that duty—to build up your staff to become better writers while still looking out for them like you would with your friends. Because your staff will always be your friends before they are writers who work under your care. No matter what position you hold, you know that they are people you can rely on if you need to—the same goes for the editorial board.
When you feel Jacob wrap his arm around you, you notice the way he rubs on your arm. His touch is a comforting one—one where you can find yourself entering a space that is built for you to be vulnerable. And you swear you are not the type of person who will cry in front of anyone. To begin with, you already find it difficult to be vulnerable with your friends.
But at that moment, you feel the waterworks turn on. The tears slowly trail down your face as you bite on your bottom lip. Accompanied by Jacob’s comforting rubs, you feel the way he pulls you to his side so that you are closer to him. You wish you could find the right words to say at that moment, but you realize that the rest of the staff do not expect you to say anything because they understand how bittersweet this moment is.
With the way Kevin and Jacob hold you in an attempt to comfort you, you realize how indebted you are to these two. They have done nothing but care for you almost in the same way Sunwoo, Changmin, and Chanhee have for you. And it pains you to know that you will not see their faces on campus for the next year—that they will never see you doing your editor duties.
But you realize that does not have to be the case because you now know that the working relationship you have with the two has now blossomed into one of friendship. You now know you are not bidding them farewell, but an “I’ll message you whenever” instead. You are glad to have joined the publication because this choice brought you to them.
You were proud of how much you two have achieved during this difficult journey. You two have come so far—from high schoolers who were still navigating the uncertainties of adolescent years to adults who have achieved heights never imagined. Although you two still had to navigate the joys and struggles of adulthood outside of college years, you knew that you had each other to rely on.
“I’m proud of you,” your boyfriend says as soon as you finish listing some plans for the next academic year. You cannot help but smile at his words. “I mean, I’ve seen you from just being a writer to taking a spot on the editorial board. I’m so glad I got to witness that growth.”
You let your hand reach out to his cheek, your thumb grazing against his cheek. “You know, I’m also proud of you, right?” He shows you a small smile. “I mean, your passion for dance still shows, and I’m glad that you were recognized for your talents and efforts. Despite some losses, you found a way to bounce back,” you say. “And I’m glad that you were able to figure out a career path that works for you.”
He unwraps one arm from your waist so that he can let his hand rest on top of yours that remains on his face. “I’m glad that you allowed yourself to be vulnerable with me. I know how hard it is for you on most days, but I’m happy you’re taking steps to allow for that change.” And you cannot help but feel your bottom lip quiver at his words.
“I love you, Changmin,” you whisper out. You bring your face closer to his so that you can rest your forehead against his. You let your eyes close before saying, “I’m glad I got to learn all about love through you.”
You feel him give you a peck on the lips. The action makes you giggle. As you open your eyes, you see how big his smile is. “I love you, too. Thank you for being my reason to keep on going.”
In your time knowing Changmin, you learned that linked arms always come with bruised hearts—that trusting someone means having to expose your most vulnerable side to them. Although it is hard to take such steps, the feeling that comes from it after is liberating.
The reality is that loving someone means building spaces for them to tell you their deepest sentiments. It also means supporting them in all that their heart lies on—helping to reestablish their independence. But most importantly, it means giving them reasons to keep going on the journey you both embark on.
You have learned about love from your best friends more than romantic media will ever show you. And every day, you are glad to continuously learn all about it through them. And now, all the love that is stored within you will grow in abundance because your friends have spent their time filling you with it.
But most of all, you are happy to know that you are not destined for loneliness in the end. You do not have to think about going back home to a colorless home after every hard day at work. Instead, you knew that your future would be full of warmth and color—all thanks to the one person who has taught you the most about love.
if you liked this, please take some time to reblog this!
#zzoguri works#deoboyznet#kflixnet#bjnet#k-labels#the boyz#ji changmin#the boyz x reader#changmin x reader#ji changmin x reader#ji changmin fluff#the boyz fluff#q x reader#kyu x reader#of linked arms and bruised hearts (you are the reason i keep on going)
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Hello ! :) I know this is a bit lengthy so feel free to skip if the next paragraph of this if you'd like lol. I'm requesting a 2016/2014 donnie x Fem!Reader love confession. I think most of us assume that donnie boy is far too shy to confess at least verbally so I'd like to think he does it in a sweet note.
https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTR9c25qX/
I am not sure if you can click on that at all but the tiktok is a girl who made her bf a book over a year filled with journal entries about how she felt and filled with movie tickets, rose petals from him etc. and I thought it was really sweet and reminded me of him <3
I hope you meant this as, Donnie makes y/n something cause that's how I wrote it. If not I'm so sorry
Bay!Donnie x Fem!reader
TMNT Stocking Stuffers
Read Between the Line
Word Count: 1.7k
Warnings: mentions of blood, crushes and confessions, just a lot of fluff, spelling mistakes, swearing,
Summary: Donnie finally finds the courage to confess his feelings....through a scrapbook
It was done.
Finally, after six long months he had finished the scrapbook.
And right in time for Christmas, how wonderful is that. The beautiful layers of snow covering the roads and trees, the constant little snowflakes flying around the air.
The smell of hot cocoa and candy canes wafting through the air no matter where you are in the city.
And now the great and unnerving pain and anxiety of possibly being rejected by the most beautiful and amazing thing to ever walk into his life. Literally.
💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️
It had happened almost a year ago now, he and his brothers were patrolling the city, as always, when a group of women had been attacked by some drunk dickheads.
Donnie and Raph had been sent down the back end of the alley in case more guys showed up as back up and so the ones already there couldn't run.
Donnie jumped down from the building first, looking at his hologram projector on his wrist, making a mental note of any and all paths the drunks could use to escape.
He was so consumed by his watch, he didn't notice Raph wasn't at his side.
"Don, wait!" Raph whisper yelled from way behind him.
That's strange why did he stop following-
One lady ran right around a dunpster and smacked right into Donnie's chest.
"Oh god!" He froze, arms awkwardly stretched out. Even thought it was past 1 in the morning, the moon was bright and it was very clear he was not human.
Even thought some humans had been alright with what they were, they knew they still had to be careful.
The woman was too busy too notice, clutching her nose in gloved hands, eyes screwed shut.
"Don! Donnie!" Raph whispered, throwing a small rock at the back of his head. Donnie glanced over his shoulder, seeing Raph had jumped up onto the buildings fire escape. "Get your ass out of there!"
"Uh-" Donnie glanced back at you, for some reason he couldn't move his legs.
"What the hell is your prob-" You yelled, opening your eyes, gasping sharply.
Great, now he's really in deep shi-
"What are you?" Your eyes were wide, a small trickle of blood dripping from your red nose, it stained your gloves, but that was the last thing on your mind.
"Uh, well, we're here to help you and your friends from those drunk guys." He awkwardly put his hands down, rubbing them on his pants.
"I'm sorry, 'we'?" You gasp, hearing a thump from behind you. Leo and Mikey jumped down the alley, promptly stopping upon seeing you standing there.
"There's more of you?" You mumble more to yourself. Your chest rising and falling rapidly.
"Don't worry, Ma'am, we're here to help. We've already taken care of the men who attacked you, is your nose okay?" Leo politely spoke, taking a step forward, putting his katanas on his shell. Subtlety putting himself between you and Mikey, just incase.
"Um, I think so," You tap the back of your glove to your nose, noticing how no new blood appeared.
"Alright, your friends are waiting in the other alley," He gestured behind him, coming to stand next to Donnie. "If you don't require immediate medical attention,"
"No, I just hit my nose on his....chest?" You waved a hand to Donnie, to which Mikey and Leo snap their heads toward to him, eyebrow ridge raised. "But it's not broken, um, thank you for helping us,"
"It's what we do," Mikey smiled, coming up to you, holding out a hand. "I'm Mikey, and I don't believe I got your name," Leo smacked the back of his head, he winced but kept his hand out.
"Y/n," To everyone's surprise you shook it, secretly taking in his features.
"Alright, we should head out, we've called the police for those drunks in the other alley," Leo grabbed Mikeys shell and pulled him away, Raph -who was surprisingly still hidden- jumped up and lifted himself to the roof of the building.
Donnie still hadn't moved, there was something about you that made his brain short circuit. Your eyes were wide and beautiful in the moonlight.
"I'm sorry about your nose," He blurted out, finally finding his voice. "And for possibly frightening you,"
"It's alright, no harm really done," You laugh, showing a beautiful smile and small dimples. "What's your name?"
"Donnie,"
💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️
Still feeling guilty about your nose, Donnie insisted on walking you home. You agreed and talked the whole time, you had a tendency, he realized, to ramble.
You gave him your number as he was leaving and texted for 3 months straight after that. It was so easy to talk to you and you were so lively and fun to be around.
You started coming over more, winning over his family and quickly becoming a close friend. You kept beating Mikeys video game high scores, showed Raph new knitting patterns and even helped Leo revive one of his almost dead plants.
When he realized he saw you as more than a friend he knew he had to do something big to tell you. He started journaling his feelings, writing how he felt when you challenged him about his favorite movies and made him see things in different lights. How happy he was when he saw you ordering food and knowing his order off the top of your head. How his knees went weak when you sat next to him during dinner and movie nights.
On your birthday he surprised you with tickets to your favorite musical, and you shocked him even more by saying you wouldn't go without him. So in he snuck, ducked into the farthest and darkest corner of the theater, secretly holding your hand the whole time.
He started compiling everything he could find: taking his journal entries, stalking your Facebook for pictures of you, and finding colorful stickers to put everywhere.
Finally, a week before Christmas it was done, he sighed, rubbing his face. He'd been up all night finishing it.
Shutting off the main lights, he took off his glasses and fell face first into bed, and for the first time in a long time, fell asleep almost instantly.
He woke up several hours later to Leo gently tapping his shell.
"Donnie? Donnie, you're still living right? Or has your coffee addiction finally stopped your heart?"
Donnie rolled onto his side, lazily pushing away Leo's hand. "I'm up, I'm up," He groaned, stretching out his long limbs. "What time is it?"
"Noon, you missed morning training," Leo, crossed his arms, taking a step back from the bed and sitting down in his computer chair.
Shit.
"Sorry, I didn't go to bed until super late last night," He rubbed his face, surprised to find he was still wearing his mask. He really must've been tired.
"What were you up doing this time?" Leo rolled his eyes, crossing his legs and leaning back in the chair.
"I finished that scrapbook for Y/n," Leo had been the first one Donnie told of his crush, knowing he could actually keep a secret. Leo was the one to suggest journaling his feelings.
"Really? Where is it?"
"It's right-" Donnie extended his hand, but stopped, the scrapbook wasn't there. "It was right there, what-" He stood, walking over to the desk, pushing the loose paper and pencils out of the way.
"It was right here!" Panic started to rise, he didn't remember putting it away.
"Did you put it away?" Leo asked.
"No, I left it right here. I don't understand, where did it go?!"
"What's going on?" Mikey leaned against the doorway, chewing on a sugar cookie.
"Donnie misplaced the gift he made for Y/n," Leo answered, rolling the chair out of the way so Donnie could duck down and search under the desk.
"You mean the scrapbook?"
Donnie hit his head on the desk from lifting it so fast. He groaned, rubbing the back of his head.
"How do you know about it, I only told Leo,"
"I went to check on you last night and saw it on the desk, and I figured I'd help," He shrugged, taking another bite of the cookie.
"Help, how help? What kind of help?" Donnie stood, walking toward him.
"Oh, Mikey," Leo groaned, running a hand down his face. "Please tell me you didn't,"
"Well I know how you can get sometimes, Don, so I sent it to Y/n, incase you got cold feet-"
Mikey didn't get to finish as Donnie was out of the room, hastily grabbing his glasses and rushing through the lair.
"Donnie! Wait, it's the middle of the day!" Leo called after him, but he didn't stop.
He rushed through the tunnels, ignoring the sleep still clinging to his arms and legs. He nearly tripped several times but he couldn't stop, his feet propelled forward.
He wouldn't chicken out. He was going to give it to you tonight, and hopefully not ruin this year's Christmas.
He finally saw the manhole cover and ladder, he feet slowing, chest heaving as he walked closer. When he got within 20 feet of the ladder, the manhole cover moved, and your form came down.
"Y/n." Donnie mentally smacked himself, it was clear why you were here.
You jumped, not expecting him to be right there. Your eyes and nose were red, and not just from the cold: you were crying.
"Hi," You peeped, clutching the scrapbook to your side.
"I can explain," He took a step for forward, sorting through the words to tell you. "I....I....uh, you-"
"Did you mean it?" You interrupt, voice thick, eyes glossy: it broke his heart. "Did you mean all the stuff you wrote in this?"
"Yeah, I did." He swallowed, his throat now very dry.
"And you still feel these things?" You took the scrapbook out, looking down at it in your hands.
"Yes, I do," He inhaled sharply, praying the tears forming in his eyes wouldn't fall. "I'm sorry if I misread-"
"You didn't," You quickly interrupt, a tear falling down your face. "You didn't misread anything...I love you too,"
You rushed forward, opening your arms wide. He exhaled heavily, crouching down and lifting you into his arms. You pressed the side of your face against his, closing your eyes.
One of his arms wrapped around your waist, lifting you off the ground, the other tangling in your hair, afraid if you moved you'd disappear.
"You really love me?" He whispers, against your wet cheek.
"I do," You smiled, pressing a kiss to his jaw. "I love you,"
"I love you too,"
💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️
tags: @thelaundrybitch @turtle-babe83 @mysticboombox @strawberrycakeblog
#tmnt#tmnt bayverse#tmnt 2014#tmnt 2016#tmnt donnie#tmnt donatello#tmnt donnie x reader#tmnt donatello x reader#tmnt x reader#thanks for the ask!#tmnt stocking stuffers
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All right so the new episodes just came out like 20 minutes ago for me (oh yeah me from the future here it ended up taking me about 3 hours to finish watching the episodes cuz I kept pausing to write stuff in between so uh yeah lol) so everything under the cut will be my live reaction to everything. I'll add time stamps so you know where I'm at in the episodes. I can guarantee you that I will be sticking to my promise about potentially eating paper if I'm wrong about Sir Pentious not dying. Which honestly now I'm not sure if anyone will die, it was pretty much confirmed in a live stream that angel dust isn't going to be the one to die so my money is on one of the Angels. Also I'm using voice to text and while I'll try and fix any misspellings or wrong words I might miss them.
LOTS OF SWEARING PROBABLY also I very much abuse capslock
EPISODE 7
00:51- I love Sir Pentious looking at Keke I just thought I should mention that
01:03- OH MY GOD NO KEKE MOVED TO HIS LAP AND HE'S PETTING HER I LOVE HIM SM
01:10 aw Alastor was sleepy you guys woke him up!
01:22- I CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE RAZZLE AND DAZZLE BEING CUTE CHARLIE IS CRYING
01:29- he did the gay little hand thing
01:50- okay so I've already seen this part because of the small leak but I cannot get over the fact that Alastor has his shoes on the bed!! Like man take those off you're getting it dirty!!!!
01:59- mfs kicking his feet on the bed acting like a high school girl about to ask out her crush on the phone at a sleepover like dude you're a serial killer you can't do this to me 😭 also I should probably slow down cuz I'm making an update literally every 2 seconds
02:18 BROS CHECKING HIS NAILS AND DOING THAT POSE WHILE MAKING FUN OF HER ABOUT THE FACT THAT SHE UNINTENTIONALLY MIGHT HAVE CAUSED THE DEATHS OF MILLIONS 💀💀💀 so fruity i love
2:33- Alasto be like "it's called masking deary. Ever heard of it?"
2:44- if he wasn't saying this in such an evil manner right now I'd be saying he's so me frfr
3:07- what do I even say to that line. He popped off but also like respectfully I think I've heard a third grader say the exact same thing
3:53- OKAY SO I WAS GOING TO SAY SOMETHING BUT I'VE COMPLETELY FORGOTTEN LOOK AT THIS FRAME, this could easily be the profile picture for someone's film review channel and I'm not 100% sure that people will understand what I mean by that unless you know a very specific person
04:38- Alastor is in his hat man era
4:33- okay so a few things, thank you subtitles for telling me that the music is edgy I feel like just the word tense would have worked on its own but I appreciate it nonetheless. Number two, I don't like seeing the girlies be mad at each other :(
05:34 I will support my boy Sir Pentious through and through he did nothing wrong!!
06:54- not the voice I was expecting for Rosie but pop up Queen she speaks the truth
07:24- ROSIE KNOWS WHAT YOU ARE ALASTOR. Also his confusion, I love him so much
11:04- she's kind of like that one Pokemon
Ad time!- I DON'T CARE ABOUT VITAMIN PILLS THAT DOUBLE MY LIFESPAN
11:13- catabettes! Cannibals and catabettes!!! This is going into my vocabulary from now on. Also this frame that I paused at I love her face.
11:57- ugh, susan. All my homies hate Susan
12:54- I have a dream, I'm here to cause a scandal in the cannibal square
13:37- :( well it wasn't obvious to me I just thought the x over the eye was to look cool :(
14:35- SONG FUCK YEAH
15:26 If this song came out years ago I know for a fact there would have been an undertale parody version of it. Also I just got a cosmic brownie and some chocolate milk let's go guys we're eating good tonight
16:00 HOLY FUCKING SHIT SHE CAN JUST GROW BACK HER WINGS
16:30- therapist Rosie is not something I thought I'd be seeing today but honestly I love it. Also I don't think I'm going to be able to finish these episodes today because I'm only a little over 15 minutes through and I've been watching for like almost over half an hour and also I just realized that what if Lucifer is the one that dies?
18:12 ALASTOR GAVE HER HIS MICROPHONE I'M GOING TO EXPLODE INTO A BAJILLION CRYING PIECES RAHHHHHH
19:38 I'm going crazy I'm going insane right now bro literally what how I don't know what to say I love this act I don't know, it's just really good I don't know what to say like this is cool I don't I DON'T KNOW! IT'S I I LIKE IT everybody in cannibal town is cool and I like them and it's like 10 seconds later now and they're literally So based like free food like so me I don't know I'm just rambling at this point
20:56 ALASTOR AND ROSIE'S LITTLE DANCE THEIR LITTLE TIPPY TAPS OH MY GOD YES
21:06- alastor, you know it's not right to make someone your political puppet. Your little dances are cute though so I'll allow it for now.
I don't know why it thought I was speaking Spanish for a second but anyways that episode was really cute and good and I liked it but I'm also scared for the next episode cuz like now I'm wondering is someone actually going to die or were people just lying. I feel like either Adam is going to be the one to die or it's going to be Lucifer cuz they mentioned a lot in the previous episode about how Charlie needs to take up the throne and get ready to take her place on the throne like why does she need to take her place on the throne? Isn't that her dad's job??? Please don't kill Lucifer off please please please 🙏 also I'm still not on board and probably will never will be on the whole political puppet thing. Like I just know I just have a feeling in my bones that alastor's favor is going to be something like "Let me be the ruler of hell lololol" or something anyways
EPISODE 8
01:01-Why are you watching other men get fucked?🤨 (/j)
01:19 🥺 I love 🥺 I oove him so 🥺 so much 🥺🥺🥺 does he have a spatula like spongebob
02:02- wait so how is Vox watching them like does he have bug cameras in the air like those little guys in v3 (woah now I have to put a Danganronpa spoiler on this)
03:42 SOFT ALASTOR FANFICTION WRITERS QUICK WRITE THAT DOWN WRITE THAT DOWN!!!
04:18- I'm not even the biggest huskerdust shipper but awwwww also I don't ship him with anyone but I just want to see Sir Pentious happy pleaseeee also the little Melody of loser baby in the background
04:48- ugh I am clutching my heart right now Sir Pentious is my SON and I LOVE HIM
04:58- what the fuck that ao3 tag was canon this WHOLE TIME???? WHEN DID YOU GUYS HEAR ABOUT THIS?????
05:05- I told you angel dust wasn't going to die
05:38- it's like the song but different! Reprise it's called a reprise also is Mimzy gonna come back
07:15- Vox, you know that you guys are going to die if they lose too right?
Okay I can't timestamp this cuz I'll just be pausing every 2 seconds but just know that everything I'm saying after this is from 07:52 to whatever number I put after later right here->09:47
Okay, so this might be a weird comparison but you know like My Little pony Battle scenes? This feels like that in the very best way possible where they have the scenes with all the different characters fighting with the different music.
Oh my God yes Cherry bomb and angel dust I love them also that was a fire transition also I JUST NOTICED THAT SIR PENTIOUS HAT ALSO HAS THE EYE DOES HE JUST HAVE I HATS FOR EVERY OCCASION
Uh oh Adams angry he's going to do a my hero academia
Oh shit it actually worked that's not good.
I TOLD YOU I CALLED IT VOX IS HORNY
Oh my God that is such a cool shot guys someone should make that frame of Alastor their computer background
OH MY GOD WHOEVER ANIMATED THAT SCENE I LOVE YOU I'M LITERALLY GIVING YOU A METAPHORICAL KISS ON THE MOUTH IN THE PLATONIC SENSE ALASTOR LOOKED SO COOL
Guys I think Adam's going to die
😨 okay so Alastor's microphone just broke and I paused it to add that emoji but as I did the people I live with got home so I'm going to have to pause it for there? I'll update if I get prime working on my phone. Also isn't alastor's microphone alive? Maybe that's the character that died.
Update: all right I got it set up on my phone about 30 minutes later now we're resuming
09:47- okay so I think it's interesting that Alastor pretty much lost all his powers as soon as his microphone broke, my guess is probably that whoever has his soul (lilith, eve, or anyone else) gave the mic to him.
09:53- I like the detail that Alastor is still smiling even though he literally just got slammed against the wall, also Vox has the biggest hate boner for Alastor like
10:02- Alastor: "Have to disagree with you there, radio's not dead." Hun you are bleeding out I'm sorry but I don't think you can gaslight girlboss your way out of this one, also I'm sorry to tell you but the only thing they play on my local radio station now besides music is like, a show that's only on at like 7 in the morning where people call to complain about how their husband wraps Christmas presents
10:38- haha silly also EGGS!!
10:43- NO WAIT MY BRAIN DIDN'T REGISTER THAT THAT EGG WAS CRACKED THEY KILLED THE FUCKING EGG!!!!!! Angel, kill them.
11:12- no no no Sir Pentious you better not I don't want to eat paper
11:21- good for him
11:44- NO GOD DAMN IT PLEASE HAVE A REVEAL THAT ALASTOR OR LUCIFER OR SOMEONE ELSE SAVED HIM PLEASE 🙏🙏🙏 I AM BEGGING ON MY HANDS AND KNEES
12:03- okay this is really cool but is he actually dead cuz I'll legitimately be really sad if so
12:50- *that one vine* "*gasp* Adam."
13:23- KILL HIS ASS CHARLIE
14:12 yes Vaggie, queen shit
SIR PENTIOUS ARE YOU DEAD /J OR /SRS?????
14:35 I KNEW IT I KNOW HE WAS GOING TO COME BACK I MEAN I GOT KIND OF SPOILED CUZ I I SAW THE COVER OF THE EPISODE BUT WOAH 10/10 ENTRANCE
14:44- gasp! His face!
15:00- he is, so stupid. I love him.
15:51-okay I went quiet for a minute cuz there were so much happening but oh my God what do I even say this is just so cool also I don't know if this is intentional or not but the blood stain on Charlie's hair is shaped like an apple
16:34- NIFFTY RAHHHHHHH
17:08- wait okay I had a brief thought that maybe lute was actually Eve but I think I'm wrong on that
17:13- Sir Pentious would've liked pancakes :((((((
Ad Time! I don't care about hard Rock Cafe I just want to know whether or not Sir Pentious is actually dead please I'm going through all the stages of grief right now and Brandan Rogers just came on my screen as Katie killjoy please
18:04- Keke :(
Oh my God they're going to find him in the rubble right? ... Right?? Right guys right???????
18:10- fat nuggets survived that's good I see a rock that looks suspiciously shaped like Sir Pentious military hat whoa guys I wonder if that means anything and it looks like it's up like someone is standing? Whoa I wonder if they'll check behind that rock please
18:16- wait is he actually dead I'm genuinely about to cry
19:16- I am not crying about his death until the episode ends I am not crying until it is 100% CONFIRMED that he died
20:50- omg alastor's alive, he's in his Jack's skeleton era that means that maybe Sir Pentious is also-
21:08- friends :) he said friends just saying
22:04- I TOLD YOU I FUCKING TOLD YOU I TOLD YOU THAT BY DYING IT WAS JUST A CHARACTER BEING REDEEMED I TOLD YOU I'M SO SMART I'M NOT EATING PAPER HAHAHAHAHA I'M THE GREATEST MAN ALIVE HE'S NOT DEAD MY SNAKE BOY ISN'T DEAD HOW DID I GET SO ATTACHED TO HIM I DON'T KNOW BUT I LOVE HIM YES I CAN'T EXPRESS MY EMOTIONS RIGHT NOW I'M GENUINELY SO HAPPY THIS IS WHY THIS IS WHY I WAITED UNTIL THE VERY END TO CRY ABOUT HIM I KNEW HE WASN'T GOING TO BE DEAD THEY WOULDN'T KILL HIM OFF THEY WOULDN'T KILL MY SNAKE BOY OFF JUST LIKE THAT
22:34- you're telling me Lilith was just doing hot girl shit on the beach for 7 years.
#alastor hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel spoilers#angel dust hazbin hotel#charlie hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel sir pentious#hazbin hotel adam#hazbin hotel episode 7 spoilers#hazbin hotel episode 8 spoilers#hazbin hotel lucifer#liveblogging#danganronpa v3 spoilers#i guess#I started watching the episodes at around 8:20 and finished the last episode at around 11:18 so almost exactly 3 hours#anyways I'm so smart and got a bunch of stuff right#just realized I didn't mention husk a single time outside of the ship mention#sorry dude I think you're a cool guy I just didn't have anything to say
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