#I love that Nina did not leave her side
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"Well, that's the only video I want out there. It was actually kinda cool. People are like, 'Mikaela's boring, she doesn't know how to party'. And I'm like, 'Well, give me 15 at La Folie Douce, and I'm going to, I don't know, do something interesting"
#mikaela shiffrin#nina o'brien#world champs#alpine skiing#what Miss Mika wants she gets#for all my sexually confused girlies#my introverted weirdo was so carefree#makes my heart soar#I love that Nina did not leave her side#and Megan watching her down that bottle like a proud mom#and Francesca and Tina getting cozy with Mika as well
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Aziraphale lied Theory
First of all, this theory is not mine, its from @/doubleskk on Twitter and can be found HERE. Go show them some love! It's in Portuguese, so I'll do my best to translate it - blue texts are my personal additions!
This season, we have something very clear in Aziraphale's development arc: is his relationship with LIE. He lied to protect Job's children, and he lied he had performed a miracle to make Nina and Maggie fall in love. That's not counting other little lies, sprinkled throughout the season here and there.
We keep seeing Crowley say "I'm a demon, I lie", but in the big finale, we have Crowley saying the truth - the big truth, the one he has been avoiding for 6 thousand years.
All of this was to set the stage for the biggest lie of all: the lie he had to tell Crowley to fend him off and protect him.
When Metatron goes to buy the coffee, he asks Nina if people ask for death, as the name of her shop is "Give me a coffee, or give me death". What if that name is an allegory for the actual conversation between Metatron and Aziraphale?
Aziraphale may have been threatened. Either Azira goes back to heaven (coffee), or he and Crowley would have their existence erased from the Book of Life (death). So, to protect Crowley, Aziraphale had to invent a lie to make sure he got away. The Book of Life was namedropped a couple of times in the show, a Chekhov's gun that never went off - Neil is too good of a writer for that.
And Aziraphale knew that Crowley would be pissed if he agreed to go back to Heaven after everything that happened, and he knew that Crowley would never accept being an angel again. "But rescuing me makes him so happy" - Aziraphale had to make sure Crowley wouldn't realize he needed saving.
That's why he knew exactly what to say to mess with Crowley.
At 41:14 of episode 6, when Azira starts telling the (alleged) lie to Crowley, he becomes all flustered, moving his hands from side to side and stammering, SAME PATTERN as when he lies to the angels about having done the Nina and Maggie fall in love, in episode 2.
[This part really works better with 2 videos side by side, which you cannot do on tumblr, so if you want you can check them out here]
The sequence of him talking to Metatron at the table is nothing more than an enactment of his lie. The conversation didn't go like that, Aziraphale made everything up.
And when Crowley declares himself, Aziraphale starts shaking his head in despair: not now, don't tell me that now.
He also looks out the window as soon as the confession starts, as if he knows Metraton was watching him outside.
Then there's the kiss, Aziraphale falters for a moment, but he has to keep up with the lie and he knows he has to hurt Crowley on purpose. And after Crowley leaves, Aziraphale is MUST recover in seconds, because Metatron is coming back. Also notice that when Metatron comes back, he doesn't ask if Crowley agreed to go back to heaven or not. He just sends a "How did he take it?"
That is, there was never any choice, and for Metatron Aziraphale was only going to break the news that he was leaving. And Aziraphale had to invent a lie to the inmates to make sure Crowley stayed away from him.
#good omens#good omens spoilers#good omens season 2 spoilers#good omens theory#LISTEN I AM FULL ON THIS THEORY. ITS LIVING IN MY HEAD RENT FREE
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the unoriginal villain origin story
Pairing: Jeonghan x fem!reader (ft. friend!Wonwoo)
Synopsis: In which Jeonghan and his friends recount the series of unfortunate events that led to you.
Alternatively, in which maybe leaving it up to fate Wonwoo is all Jeonghan really needed to do all along.
Genre: Fluff, crack, angst if you squint, cliche af, prequel to Thursday's Child Has Far to Go anthology, dilf!jeonghan, uncle!wonwoo (he's engaged LOL), part university!au, mild E2L (they're not really enemies, but OC definitely trying to stay AWAY from Jeonghan at first), one-sided turned mutual pining
Warnings: Profanity, mentions of food/alcohol, mildly suggestive (they just kiss and jeonghan likes skinship), reader is shorter than jeonghan, jeonghan changes hair color a couple times, wonwoo just swallows food without chewing like a maniac, proofread but not well, there are inconsistencies between this and easter egg's dropped about their relationship in other fics (i will fix that some day!)
wc: ~14.6k
A/N: I had so much trouble posting this T^T
First long fic in a while🫶🏻 It's not my best story nor is it that deep, but made me feel all sorts of giddy 💞 I hope you enjoy it as much as I did writing!
“So,” Leah starts with her mouth half-full, capturing the table’s attention. She’s quick to cover her lips and swallow her food before continuing. “I’m curious,” she points between Jeonghan and you, “How’d you two end up together? As long as I’ve known Wonwoo, you’ve been married.”
Immediately, Wonwoo snorts, nearly spitting out his dinner on his friend sitting across the table. Jeonghan scorns in disgust, frowning, offended as to why Wonwoo finds his fiance’s question amusing. In contrast, you seem to lose your appetite, silver fork clattering against your half-filled ceramic plate. You grow quiet, straightening your spine and avoiding eye contact like you were back in middle school, caught red-handed with a confession letter to your crush.
“I honestly thought she was going to end up with Baekho – she loathed Jeonghan with a passion,” Wonwoo chuckles to himself as he redirects his chopsticks at your husband. “But Jeonghan knocked her up – that’s what happened.”
“Okay,” Jeonghan is quick to defend. He sighs, shooting Wonwoo a bored, but annoyed look, “That’s not what happened – do you have to put it that way?”
The other man only shrugs his shoulders, raising his palms to the sky playing innocent and oblivious.
Leah’s eyes flicker back and forth between you and your husband, then sweet Nina. Leah’s innocent smile slowly fading as you neither confirmed or answered. She isn’t aware that this was a sensitive topic for you and Jeonghan, and the last thing she wants to do is offend her fiance’s friends! The two of you just seem to get along so well and so in love, for lack of a better description, it’s hard for Leah to imagine much malice as to how you met and got together. Yet, this raises the additional worrisome, unfounded suspicion: Did you and Jeonghan just get married out of convenience?
No – that couldn’t be! Wonwoo is a sensible man; he wouldn’t be laughing if it was a pitiful marriage of convenience.
“She didn’t hate me,” Jeonghan starts to explain.
“She blocked your number after the blind date,” Wonwoo interjects.
You met during a blind date?
“It wasn’t even our blind date,” Jeonghan quickly shoots back. He clenches his jaw, clearly getting fed up with Wonwoo’s teasing.
This is certainly interesting for Leah . . . Jeonghan frequently annoyed Wonwoo, not that the latter gave the older gentleman the reaction he wanted, but it is rare to see Wonwoo get under Jeonghan’s skin.
“It wasn’t, which makes it all the funnier,” Wonwoo comments, “In fact, she was technically,” Wonwoo holds his fingers up in air quotes, “‘my blind date.’”
“I was merely doing you a favor by tagging along – and it was free food!” you finally exclaim, frowning at Wonwoo.
Wonwoo waves you off, smirking, “Jeonghan was down bad.”
Confused, Leah holds up a hand to silence the bickering. She shakes her head, “Wait, wait, wait – please start from the beginning. I didn’t grow up with you guys, so I’m so lost.”
Like those corny rom-coms, you and Jeonghan turn to look at each other at the same time, exchanging a knowing, tired look. There’s a bashful tinge to your expression; interestingly, the corner of Jeonghan’s lips quirks up in a crooked, smug smile.
Sure, you may have resisted (NOT hate) him at first, and Wonwoo can make fun of him all he wants, but it’s Yoon Jeonghan who won in the end.
After all, you're sitting next to him at the dinner of your shared home as his wife and Nina's mom after all.
. . . .
The day was near perfect for Wonwoo.
His morning coding lecture was canceled, so he got to sleep in. Though there was a pop quiz in his Operating Systems class, he passed with flying colors for once. Wonwoo only had two classes today, finishing in the early afternoon, leaving the rest of the day to his leisure. He decided to celebrate by treating himself to some fancy coffee from the new bougie cafe that opened on the edge of campus before meeting up with a friend for a quick study session. Now, Wonwoo wasn't some latte snob, but there was something pleasant and relaxing about taking a quiet stroll around campus with his Airpods plugged in and an overpriced hot brew with several scoops of sugar and multiple pumps of mocha syrup in his hand. The weather on this autumn day was also just right – not too cold that he needed a windbreaker, but not too warm that his green and orange plaid flannel and yellow beanie combo didn’t make him sweat buckets.
All was wonderful: It was just him and his overpriced bougie sweet sludge of caffeine. Indeed this campus was huge and he was surrounded by so many students rushing to class or laughing with their friends on the grass instead of studying; however, he felt anonymous and loved it. No one minded him, no one dared to bother him–
“Hey!” a familiar crack of a shrill interrupts IU’s sweet voice streaming through his ear piece. It’s accompanied by a bony and heavy hand clamping onto his shoulder, nearly yanking Wonwoo back and tumbling onto his ass if he didn’t catch his footing.
Annoyed, Wonwoo pulled out his earbud and turned to face his menace of a friend: Yoon Jeonghan. He was panting, chocolate brown hair stuck to his forehead by sweat and sticking out in funny directions in the gentle breeze, as if he had been chasing Wonwoo for several minutes.
“Why are you out of breath?” Wonwoo deadpanned.
“I’ve been,” Jeonghan sucked in breath, “Running,” he heaved again, “After you! Calling your name! How loud is your music? God – you’ve been spending too much time with Hansol.” Jeonghan adjusted the straps of his backpack, making a point to roll his shoulder back dramatically.
“Sorry,” Wonwoo muttered, fingers tapping his screen to pause his music. “Um, what do you need? Can I help you?” He cleared his throat, keeping eye contact with Jeonghan as he took a sip of his coffee, presuming it cooled down by now.
“Go on a date with me,” Jeonghan said.
Wonwoo choked, the mocha liquid spilling from between his lips, accidentally spraying the hem of Jeonghan’s gray t-shirt.
“Wonwoo!” Jeonghan screamed, jumping back.
The said man was quick to dab his lips with the back of his hand, coughing in the process.
“What the fuck, dude!” Jeonghan groaned, brushing at his shirt. “Good thing I didn’t wear white today.”
“I’m sorry, but what?” Wonwoo exclaimed. A few passing students throw confused glances in their directions. Wonwoo lowered his voice and quickly added, “Look – I know we’re good friends and I like you – as a friend, and I respect you, but I don’t swing that way.”
Probably thirty seconds passed by as Wonwoo waited impatiently for his friend to explain his request further. Jeonghan’s expression only grows unreadable, his brows softening as he let’s go of his shirt, lips drooping into a frown. Taking Wonwoo by surprise, Jeonghan roughly grabbed Wonwoo’s wrist and pulled him close. He tried to pull back, but for a twink, Jeonghan’s grip was strong.
“I’ve loved you for so long! I can’t believe you won’t–”
Thwack!
“Hey!” Wonwoo’s hands come flying to the back of his head at the pain shooting up neck.
“No, you dumbass!” Jeonghan finally sounding like himself again, “I’m asking you to come on a blind date with me – to keep me safe and keep me company, of course. Save me when I give you the look.”
“The look?” Wonwoo asked, still rubbing the base of his head.
“You know,” Jeonghan widened his eyes and clenched his jaw, extending his neck like a giraffe. “That look.”
“Right,” Wonwoo replied slowly – as if he knew what that meant. He waved his friend off. “Sorry – I can’t though. I also don’t want to third wheel.”
“Why not!” Jeonghan groaned.
“I’m busy.”
“Aren’t we all?”
“I’m meeting a friend.”
“Bring your friend!” Jeonghan grabbed Wonwoo’s arm desperately, “Or anyone really. Please! I just don’t want to go on this date alone.”
“You hit me – why would I?” Wonwoo teased back. “Also, why’d you agree to the blind date if you don’t want to go?”
“I owe it to Seungcheol,” Jeonghan groaned. “I’m going in his stead – something having a girl.”
“Ah,” Wonwoo nodded, the pieces coming together. The two friends were close and had a history of exchanging blind dates and sending one versus the other – a weird pact they developed in their freshman year of university. He suddenly scrunched his brows together, a new question forming on the tip of his tongue. “Wait – Seungcheol has a girl?”
Jeonghan doesn’t seem to care, however. “So?”
“So?” Wonwoo repeated back, confused
“I’ll pay for food,” Jeonghan offered.
As if on cue, Wonwoo’s stomach growled. The two of them peer down at his abdomen, then back at each other. He was a growing, but broke college student – his fridge didn’t contain much yesterday, and even less today.
Rubbing his belly, he replied quietly, “I guess I can think of someone.”
“Great!” Jeonghan brightened immediately. “7PM, tomorrow – don’t be late!”
. . . .
[Wonwoo]: Want free food?
. . . .
[Y/N]: This is NOT what I envisioned when you said ‘free food’ >:(
Pushing his black-rimmed spectacles up his nose bridge, Wonwoo looked up at his phone, offering you a sheepish, but apologetic smile, from across the table. He gave you a small shrug, scrunching his lips and bowing his head slightly to silently say ‘sorry.’ The sincerity of his apology doesn’t seem to go through though, as you only sigh heavily and roll your eyes.
Violently, you stabbed your wooden chopstick into the pork belly sizzling in front of you. Not minding to blow at it, quickly, you stuck in your mouth, instantly regretting your decision, of course as the heat burnt a piece of your tongue. You jolted a little, eyes beginning to water.
And then, he does it – again.
Sleeves of his brown sweater rolled up to his elbow, he reached over the steaming grill and placed a freshly refilled, full glass of ice water in front of you.
Hand hovering over your lip, your eyes flicker to Jeonghan. Lips pressed into a thin, but genuinely warm, crooked smile, his deep brown eyes, once round curves into half moons under the overgrown bangs of his soft cool brown hair (which was growing blotchy and brassy, if you might add). Though you were curious why he looked at you with such disgusting saccharine dripping from his eyes that may or may not have made you feel some type of way, you don’t let your gaze linger for long to figure out why. You were quick to turn your shoulder towards him, covering your steaming mouth and concentrating on a crack in the old oak windowsill.
It had been like this since five minutes into the (now that you know) double blind date. You’re not sure how the seating arrangement ended up this way when you and Wonwoo were just here in support, but Jeonghan sat next to you, Dami across from you, and Wonwoo diagonally position. His date, Dami, sat across from him, but Jeonghan seemed to pay minimal mind to her, answering her questions politely, but vaguely.
Perhaps you were just thinking too much about it, but Jeonghan was paying more attention to you. He laughed a little too loud at your blunt remarks, you caught him staring in your direction one too many times, and was a little too attentive at what was in your bowl. You made a point to ask Wonwoo about it after.
The gestures seemed sweet until you took a step back and got a larger view of the situation: Two facts were certain.
One – You weren’t close with Jeonghan despite sharing Wonwoo and a few others as a mutual friend. Yet his reputation was notorious as it was confusing. Neither quite the fuck boy nor the campus hearthrob (that title belonged to his friend, Seungcheol), Yoon Jeonghan was a silent menace to collegiate society. He was gorgeous – a deep set of dark brown eyes framed by long velvet lashes, his features were gentle, yet somehow dynamic and sharp. His warm smile ignited hearts across campus, but no one dared confess to him: His intentions (or the lack thereof) were known far and wide: Yoon Jeonghan did not date. He was cordial, perhaps sometimes a mischievous flirt if bored, but his true kindness did not go out easily. It was not known why he didn’t date, a man that beautiful could snatch someone up with a bat of his lashes and flick of his finger. Some of your friends had said he had a long distance girlfriend on the other side of the country, others have proposed he was afraid of commitment and a closet fuck boy – kept his flings under wraps. He was close with the soccer team after all.
With all of this “knowledge” about him in mind, that led you to the second point: Jeonghan was Dami’s blind date. There’s a piece of you that is curious as to why Jeonghan agreed to a blind date with Dami – not in a toxic or jealous way of course. Her jet black hair trimmed into a short, messy but stylish shag bob, her features resembling that of a wide-eyed kitten, Dami was indeed cute. You didn’t know much about her, however; no money to her name, she wasn’t particularly popular or desired in that way on campus, did not participate in sports or clubs, and you’re not even sure how she was linked to Jeonghan in the first place.
Perhaps this was Dami’s big love story: the campus enigma takes interest in an ordinary girl and whisks her away to live an adventurous life after graduation.
The catch though?
Dami didn’t seem interested in Jeonghan at all.
In fact, hearts were literally shooting out of her eyes at Wonwoo.
“So, uh,” Dami cleared her throat, her eyes flickered up to Wonwoo then you before returning back to the boy on her side. Tucking a strand of hair behind her ear, she asked, “Are the two of you . . .?”
Wonwoo choked on his lettuce, followed by your awkward cough. Much to both of your surprises, Jeonghan also nearly spat out his water at Wonwoo. A moment of silence at the table lingered, the three of you glancing at each other, while Dami sat back in her seat trying to make sense of the situation; though frankly, you and Wonwoo were equally confused as to why Jeonghan reacted so volatilely too.
“We’re just friends,” Wonwoo finally piped up. He cleared his throat, dabbing the invisible stain in the corner of his lip with the napkin.
You nodded vigorously in confirmation.
“Oh? Okay,” Dami said softly, a little breathless. There’s a small twitch of the corner of her lip, threatening to stretch into a grin, but she caught herself, offering the table a tight smile instead.
Out of the corner of your eye, you can see Jeonghan visibly relax, quietly returning to the meat grilling in front of him.
The rest of the dinner proceeded without any choking mishaps – it was fairly nice, honestly. You decided that you actually really liked Dami. Despite her cat-like appearance and coy nature, she was lively and innocent. Her crush on Wonwoo was evident and you found it endearing, though your friend might not.
In regards to Jeonghan, his nonchalant, yet caring nature carried on throughout the night; it even got Wonwoo raising his brows curiously. You do your best to not pay mind to him, but every now and then, you find yourself heating up at the sound of his deep laughter.
After bidding the pair goodbye and exchanging phone numbers with Dami, you and Wonwoo set off for your shared apartment complex. You lived in the same building, him on the second floor, you on the fourth floor.
Unable to contain your curiosity much longer, you check behind you to make sure Jeonghan is a good distance away before nudging Wonwoo’s elbow. He looked at you, unamused, silently asking you what you wanted.
You began, “Hey, this is a weird question and I know you were just there for moral support and free food, but did you get the feeling that Jeonghan–”
“Yeah,” Wonwoo confirmed, already knowing the answer to your unfinished question. You stutter in your steps, putting you a few feet behind him. Wonwoo continued forward, showing no signs of slowing down for your confused state. He hollered back, “He’s definitely into you.”
It made you feel some type of way, but you can’t decide if it’s a good type of way or you didn’t like it all together. Your heart beats funny for the first time in years – it was reminiscent of when you developed a crush in middle school, but different due to the uncertainty of this feeling. Unbeknownst to you, Wonwoo’s comment made you come to a halt altogether, quietly contemplating in the middle of the sidewalk while strangers walked around you.
As if on cue, just as Wonwoo noticed your absence lingering behind him, he turned to find Jeonghan actually running willingly, fast approaching behind you. He touched your elbow, interrupting your daze and you turned around slowly to greet him. Wonwoo can’t make out your expression, but he could only imagine, you looked lost like a guppy in the sewers. On the other hand, Jeonghan’s expression was very visible and clear: his friend was beaming; subtly in his smiles and soft in his eyes, but beaming nonetheless.
One would think Jeonghan had something important to tell you given the way he sprinted nearly a block to catch up to you, heaving between words, but his message was rather simple.
“It was really nice meeting you, Y/N.”
Yet, for some reason, it made all the impact.
. . . .
“Please!” Jeonghan hissed, stabbing Wonwoo’s side with the tip of his pencil. Wonwoo winced away, shooting daggers in his friend’s direction. He was trying to use this spare few hours between classes to study for his finals in the serenity and quiet of the library. His friends knew around this time of the semester, Wonwoo didn’t like to be disturbed, but it just so happened that Jeonghan had an urgent request, prompting him to track down the computer engineering major to his sacred, hidden spot of the law school library. “Can you give me her number? It’s not that hard!”
Though irritating, Wonwoo did find this version of Yoon Jeonghan was very entertaining as much as it was enthralling as Jeonghan never took this much interest in anyone or anything. He wanted to let his intrusive thoughts win and indulge in it.
The two of you were like night and day. Whereas, you spoke your feelings, wants, and needs openly, Jeonghan never dared to do so. His requests were cryptic, embedded questions pertaining to the objective, rather than what his heart desired truly. You had your mind set on a goal; Jeonghan was one to flow and ebb with the waters of life.
However, though neither of you knew it yet, there was a beguiling bone in the both of you. It depended on how it played out whether it’d unite the both of you or send you apart. At this point, it was unironically up to Wonwoo if he wanted to be the third player in this game. t
Wonwoo scoffed, shaking his head.
“What?” Jeonghan frowned.
“Do you want it that bad?” Wonwoo asked. He pressed his friend further. “And why?”
Jeonghan closed his mouth as quick as he opened it, retracting the rationale at the tip of his tongue. A good gambler never shows his cards first. His eyes flickered, contemplating his next few words more carefully before adjusting his posture and continuing.
“Just because,” Jeonghan replied nonchalantly.
Wonwoo chuckled, not surprised.
“If you’re just going to fuck around with her heart, I’d rather not,” Wonwoo replied, shrugging.
And it was true – you were the same age, but to some extent, you felt like a long-lost younger sister to Wonwoo.
“Hey,” Jeonghan punched him lightly. There was a slight warning tone as he was frowning even more, well aware of what Wonwoo was referring to. Jeonghan has never bothered to clarify the rumors of his dating life, thinking it too much work, but that didn’t mean he liked them either. “You know that’s not true and I would never.”
“Then admit it,” Wonwoo shot back.
“Admit what?!” Jeonghan flailed his hands wildly, earning a few dirty looks from the studious students a few tables away.
“You want Y/N’s number because you’re interested.”
“Th-that’s not it,” Jeonghan muttered weakly. “I mean, yes? But also no? I just . . . want to know her better – you know, as a friend . . . first.”
Crossing his arm over his chest, Wonwoo nodded, feigning agreement. “Right, right.”
“Wonwoo,” Jeonghan protested.
When he didn’t respond, Jeonghan groaned loudly, flopping back in his spinning chair dramatically.
“If you won’t tell me, I’ll find someone else to give it to me,” Jeonghan threatened.
“And risk other people questioning why you want to contact Y/N?” Wonwoo teased. He shot Jeonghan a shit-eating grin, “You know what they’re all going to think, right?”
“Jeon Wonwoo, when did you get so fucking irritating?”
Wonwoo leaned forward, waving his finger for Jeonghan to get closer. The latter hesitated for a second before giving in.
“If there’s one thing you should know about Y/N,” Wonwoo started in a hushed voice, “You’re not the first one to ask for her number.”
“So?” Jeonghan asked incredulously, “Why should that matter?”
“Just saying,” Wonwoo leaned back, resting his hands on the nape of his neck, “Don’t be surprised if she turns you down – she doesn’t like to mess around. She’s not really . . . actively looking to date right now either, honestly. Something about careers and being her ‘me’ era.” At the time, Jeonghan wasn’t sure what that meant, but he was sure content with the way Wonwoo ripped a corner of his notebook and scribbled down your digits. “You should be grateful we’re friends – she asked me not to hand out her number the first time I gave it to Johnny Suh.”
He handed the scrap over to Jeonghan, who beamed as if it was the golden ticket from Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory.
May Yoon Jeonghan be the last to ask for your number.
Wonwoo called after Jeonghan, “In return, all I ask is that you don’t tell Y/N you got the number from me.”
“Why?” Jeonghan asked, adjusting the strap of his backpack on his shoulder as he stood up from his desk.
Wonwoo rubbed his neck sheepishly, tips of his ear turning red. “I also don’t want her passing out my number – it’s a pact we made, kinda.”
It all clicked for Jeonghan then, if not more. “Don’t worry,” Jeonghan waved, “I’ll send Dami a text.”
“Hey!”
. . . .
[Jeonghan]: Hey – this is Yoon Jeonghan :)
[Jeonghan]: I got it from Wonwoo hehehe.
[Y/N Y/L/N]: ???
[Jeonghan]: Hello?
[Y/N Y/L/N]: [your message not delivered]
. . . .
You don’t hear from Jeonghan after the double blind date.
Not that you were anticipating it, but still– Wonwoo said he was into you and then he chased you down a block to tell you it was nice to meet you!
Ugh – the bar was so damn low.
On the other hand, you do hear from Dami, the two of you quickly becoming better friends. She reached out to you on Instagram, playful chatter turning into occasional hangouts and then weekly coffee runs or walking to the general vicinity of your classes together in between lectures. You were suspicious at first, wondering if she was using you to get closer to Wonwoo, but her intentions seemed sincere. Indeed, she did ask about Wonwoo every now and then, eventually also asking if he was seeing anyone, you didn’t find it particularly annoying. She still wanted to be your friend and understood boundaries, choosing to admire from afar and up close when the opportunity presents.
It also turned out that Wonwoo wasn’t the only one who sensed there was something up about Jeonghan at the blind date as Dami brought it up months later when you passed the barbeque restaurant where you all met that fateful day on a stroll. At this point, you’d like to think Jeonghan became a distant memory – just a fleeting interaction, but there are times that you do catch yourself wondering about him. You wonder what he’s up to, wonder if he’s gone on more blind dates, what would have happened if you were a little more forward and you reached out.
“Oh,” Dami waved you off when you asked about how she got Jeonghan to agree to a blind date with her. “I was just as surprised as the rest of you – that blind date was actually supposed to be with Choi Seungcheol, but I’m not sure what happened. He’s cute, but Jeonghan’s not really my type.”
“I see,” you nodded, feeling a sense of relief for some weird reason. You snuggle your hands deeper into the pockets of your puffer jacket.
A beat passed before Dami asked slowly, “Is Jeonghan your type though?”
You peer down at the shorter girl, quirking a curious eyebrow.
“What?” she asked innocently. “It was totally obvious – he was head over heels for you.”
“As if,” you scoffed. “We literally just met that night.”
She bumped your shoulder lightly. “Ey, haven’t you heard of love at first sight?”
“I don’t believe in love at first sight,” you corrected her. “I hardly know him and vice versa; how is he supposed to like me already?”
“It’s just . . . a vibe, I guess,” Dami tried to reason, “He liked your vibe.”
“Very scientific,” you replied sarcastically.
“I’m just saying,” Dami shrugged, “I may be a hopeless romantic, but I’ve never seen Jeonghan act out like that before.”
“Did you know him prior?” you asked curiously.
Dami hummed, tapping her finger to her chin. “I knew of him and I’ve seen him here and there, but I never talked to him like that. Our circles never really overlapped, other than Seungcheol. Knowledge by observation – Jeonghan’s not really . . . he’s . . . gosh, kind of hard to explain.”
“How so?” your interest was piqued.
“I don’t know . . . the way he talks . . . it feels like he’s flirting with everyone, but it’s never serious and he’s actually not? You’d think with how playful he is, he’d be an asshole,” Dami fumbled with her words.
You felt your heart sink a little. “So what I’m hearing is . . . this was probably lust at best.”
“No! With you, it was different though! Agh – fuck, wish I was better with words,” Dami protested.
“Doesn’t sound different.”
“Is he your type though?” Dami pressed again, nonetheless.
You took a moment to contemplate, head skimming through your celebrity crushes, things you liked in old exes, things you didn’t like as you learned, growing up. Again, you hardly knew Jeonghan, but you’re slowly starting to piece together the person he seemed to be. He was the kind of man your mother warned you about: good-looking, sweet with their words and actions, but unpredictable – in a bad kind of way.
Eventually, you shook your head, letting out a heavy breath. “Not really – he’s . . . too pretty,” you replied, “Wouldn’t bat an eye on him if I saw him on the metro.” Your voice trailed off as you were not in a mood to explain yourself further. Despite the certainty in your voice, the answer didn’t seem to settle well into your body, making you feel squeamish, a heavy sensation landing in your chest.
So what if Jeonghan wasn’t your type?
Dami hummed in understanding, “I can see that.” She kicked the ball of snow in front of her. “Well then, it’s a good thing you won’t see him again, right?”
“Right.”
“What is your type then?” Dami asked. She quickly added, “Just asking for funsies.”
You smiled, appreciative that she’d indulge in your delusions every now and then.
Just as you parted your lips to start, a deep voice bellowed your name from afar in front of the both of you. Dami and you lift your heads from the icy pavement, to find a broad young man standing a few feet away. His jacket was unzipped, sweater hanging loosely from his shoulders, just enough so that you can see his tattoo peeking out from underneath the collar. He grinned wide, eyes turning into crescents under his thick brows, cheeks and the tip of nose pink.
“B-Baekho,” you stammered. Your lips wobble nervously as if they couldn’t decide whether to smile or hide the way your heart fluttered at the sight of him. “Hey.”
Despite your long-time crush standing before you, you had to make a conscious effort to quell the lingering thoughts of Jeonghan in the back of your mind.
. . . .
You were wrong – you would see Yoon Jeonghan again.
You and Jeonghan shared more mutual friends than you had thought.
It’s Soonyoung’s birthday party. You’re not sure why, Soonyoung was full of surprises, but he invited a handful of his friends out to the outdoor ice skating rink about half an hour from campus. The plan was to hang out there for the afternoon before returning to his apartment for an evening of festivities.
Jeonghan had changed his appearance since you last saw him. His once dark brown hair was now bleach blonde – he’d grown it out, the dark roots peaking through, but the bright ends hung shaggily, skimming over his long velvet lashes. At the chalet while lacing up his skates, he still donned those skittish grins and playful smirks whenever he was teasing his other friends, elbowing them and throwing his head back in a deep laughter, in contrast to his soft voice most days.
You do your best to avoid him, sticking close with Dami (Soonyoung let you bring a plus one) on the rink or choosing to sit close to Wonwoo who opted to stay inside and watch from the chalet. Dami does a pretty good job keeping you busy, anyhow – the girl could hardly skate, clinging onto the walls and calling for you every time you strayed too far. It was moments like this you were thankful your mother put you in ice skating for a brief moment in your youth before you vehemently quit in fourth grade, terrified by the stories of professional figure skaters needing hip surgery and waking up early every Saturday for lessons. It also seemed like Jeonghan was facing the same challenge with the birthday boy. Out of the corner of your eyes every now and then, you’d catch a glimpse of Soonyoung bent over at a 90 degree angle, hands outstretched clinging onto Jeonghan’s hands like his life depended on it.
“Y/N!” Dami called for the umpteenth time that afternoon. “Y/N! Hey!”
You huffed, growing tired of slowing down for your friend. You loved her! Don’t get it wrong, it’s just you wanted at least one round, where you could whiz around the rink and awaken those skater muscles you once built.
You spun around to face her, skating backwards. “Dami, I think we should get you one of those skating walkers–”
“No, you idiot!” she cried, pointing behind you aggressively, “Watch out!”
Her warning proved too late, however. By the time you faced forward again, you came crashing into a familiar blob of white puffer and a high-pitched, but husky shriek. A set of arms wrapped around your body and you curled yourself inwards, allowing yourself to take refuge into whoever had been your demise and your savior. Mittens clinging onto the slippery material of their coat, you squeeze your eyes shut, letting your fumbling feet still so no one tripped and you both fell.
The both of you eventually hit the side of the rink, eliciting a quiet ‘umph’ from the mystery person. The trauma of the impact seemed to linger a little longer; you were afraid to open your eyes to see yourself sailing towards a whole crowd of people despite feeling yourself still.
“Um,” the person shifted uncomfortably. They tapped your shoulder before trying to peel you off of them, “Y-you can let go.”
You peel your lids open, one by one, cautiously to make sure you were no longer moving. Eventually, you relax, pulling back a little – still holding on nonetheless.
The person cleared their throat, prompting you to look up.
Fuck.
Jeonghan gave you a tight lipped smile, “Hey.”
“Uh, hi,” you replied, awkwardly.
“You can let go now,” he looked around, leaning back into the board, “People are staring.”
“Oh, right,” you pushed yourself back, letting your skates drift you away. “Sorry.”
“It’s fine,” Jeonghan pretended to be busy and brushed off the invisible wrinkles in his coat.
A beat passed as he straightened out, catching your gaze and letting it linger. You feel your heartbeat hastened, his stare making you nervous and stirring up other feelings in your stomach, but you don’t dare look away – it was weirdly addicting.
“Um well,” Jeonghan finally said, he nodded once, “It was nice seeing you around.”
You panicked, launching yourself towards him and catching his elbow. “Wait!”
Jeonghan threw you a confused look over his shoulder, quietly waiting for you to continue.
“W-wait,” you whispered again under your breath. You inhaled harshly, eyes flickering up to meet him before dropping them to his black and white, scuffed rental skates. “D-do you maybe . . . wanna get hot cocoa?” You pointed back at the chalet and Jeonghan followed your mittens.
He paused, expression unreadable. His brows knitted together, lips pressing into a thin line. He looks all over the place except for you, finally coming to a conclusion and answering, “Sure.”
“Cool,” you nodded.
He was the first to leave, skating towards the entrance of the rink.
You followed quietly.
Dami and Soonyoung watched from afar, both kneeling on the ice, one hand on the side board as their saviors left them to fend on their own.
. . . .
The chalet was bustling with life: mothers with their young children in tow, friends bundled in layers as they waddled unsteadily in their skates towards the entrance, and others strewn across the wooden tables and benches. The young teens behind the cafe counter were certainly sweating away running between the cash register and the food warmers and coffee machines behind them.
Jeonghan had graciously paid for your hot chocolates – not without a fight of course. You didn’t really want your drink to come with drinks attached. The two of you found a small table tucked away near the parking lot. It was a little quieter in this area, a little colder as well with the people coming and going. Nerves wracked your stomach as you tried to be as calm as possible, hopeful that he wouldn’t notice the regret lacing your entire body right now. You wonder if you got a concussion during that collision to even have the gall to invite him for a drink after all these months.
What would you even talk about? It’s not like your conversations during the double date were that deep. Let alone, who were you that he’d remember details about you?
The words exchanged between you and Jeonghan were far and few since the collision on ice – they were more so out of necessity. What you wanted to drink specifically, where you wanted to sit, be careful not to run into the kid whizzing across the chalet main floor.
“You blocked my number,” Jeonghan blurted, interrupting your musing. You were only two sips into your hot chocolate, lips lifting off the rim of your white paper cup. He noted how the brown liquid faintly stained the rim where they once rested.
Jeonghan couldn’t hold it in much longer – the question was ruminating in the back of his mind for the past few months like an annoying fly they couldn’t swat in the house in the summer. He did his damn best to “let it go” like everyone said because “maybe it wasn’t meant to be.” However, it must mean something to have quite literally run into you now and you asked him to drink hot chocolate with you in the chalet, right? He wanted and needed to know your intentions.
Jeonghan watched you intently from the opposite side of the bench, your bustling surroundings melting away. You seemed to be in your own world, your silence ensuing. He noted how your left eyebrow twitched momentarily as if you were confused. It was quick to turn sly, your brow softening again, your lips curving into an amused smirk. It sent chills down Jeonghan’s spine to see your demeanor flip so quickly when you were coy moments earlier. Gears were turning – almost like you were plotting something.
“And?” you asked, bringing up your paper cup of hot chocolate to your lips, the rim covering half of your face.
Jeonghan snorted, shaking his head – the audacity!
“Yet, you’re asking to have a drink together?” Jeonghan continued.
“How’d you get my number in the first place?” you asked instead. You raised a curious eyebrow.
Jeonghan narrowed his gaze, setting his paper cup down roughly with a loud ‘clack’. The warm liquid sloshed around, threatening to spill over. “It’s rude to answer a question by asking another question.”
You shrugged nonchalantly, leaning forward towards him as if to challenge him; pressing Jeonghan to answer your question rather than vice versa. However, what you didn’t know was that Jeonghan was a different breed of man. He did not fall easily under pressure in the presence of a woman he was attracted to – he could sit here in awkward silence as long as you wanted.
You’re not sure how long this showdown actually lasted, losing track of time. Seconds to minutes past, your drinks turned lukewarm and condensation formed on the inside of the unfilled regions of the cup. Admittedly, Jeonghan did grow more frustrated with you; yet he remained hopeful you’d crack. No one could withstand the “Yoon stare,” as Seokmin had dubbed it a few months prior at a drinking party. Nonetheless, perhaps he was a masochist, because for some reason, he was enjoying the company of someone who could keep up with him.
“Yah!” a shrill comes from across the room.
It was only a matter of seconds before Soonyoung, tip of his nose pink, came stomping over, removed his waterproof glove, and smacked the back of Jeonghan’s shoulder. Dami wasn’t far behind, though less upset. She threw you a questioning look, one that told you that you were going to have to explain yourself afterwards.
“And you!” Soonyoung pointed an accusing finger at you. He then pointed it back and forth between you and Jeonghan. “You both suck leaving us stranded and helpless on the ice! You know, a couple of twelve-year-olds had to help us off! Took us almost twenty minutes!”
You shot Soonyoung an apologetic look, muttering a quiet ‘sorry’ before he quipped again, asking, “Also, like . . .” His eyes darted at the cups of hot chocolate and the way you were arranged at the table. Pieces began to click together. “What is this?” he tried to sound angry, “A date or something? I didn’t even know you guys knew each other!”
“Yeah,” Dami piped up, “A date or something?”
You coughed at this, turning your head away from them.
Jeonghan made a note of this, raising a curious brow, before turning to Soonyoung. He shrugged and answered, “Or something.”
“Ugh,” Soonyoung groaned, “So you guys are like that.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Jeonghan asked.
Soonyoung opened his mouth to answer, but Dami was quick to cut him off, an agenda of her own brewing. “Soonyoung, wanna grab a bite? And maybe some hot chocolate? My treat? We can go sit by Chan and Wonwoo over there.”
“But–”
“Great!”
Dami winked at Jeonghan, quickly pushing the birthday boy away.
Jeonghan was really curious now. He turned back to you, who was still pretending to be fascinated by the old linoleum floors and the tips of your worn winter boots.
“Yah,” Jeonghan called.
You looked up, lips pursed.
“You didn’t answer my question,” he said.
“And you didn’t answer mine,” you replied.
“Are you usually this irritating?”
“I don’t know, am I?”
Jeonghan let out a huff, blowing his blonde bangs.
You were reaching for your cup and started to rise from your seat.
“Hey, where are you–”
“You look better with brown hair by the way,” you deadpanned. You pointed at your own head, “It looked . . . healthier that way.”
Those were your last words before you set off towards Wonwoo’s and Chan’s table to join the others.
If you were just anyone, Jeonghan might have shot some sassy comment back at your insult. However, like never before, Jeonghan suddenly became anxious – as if you were slipping away like a balloon streamer threatening to drift away from a child’s hand in a windstorm. He felt his heart beginning to race and tongue took control of him. He spun in his seat and blurted after you instead, “Will I see you again?”
You paused in your stride before throwing a confused and mildly annoyed look over your shoulder. Your expression was quick to shift though. A shit-eating grin slowly stretching across your face, you explained casually, “Life . . . is full of surprises, Yoon Jeonghan. Only time can tell.” You raise your cup towards him in a final salute.
“Touche,” Jeonghan muttered under his breath. .
Jeonghan watched you settle next to Wonwoo, bumping shoulders with your friend who only shot you an annoyed look when he raised his head from his book. Pushing his black-rimmed glasses up his nose, he said something, eliciting a frown and sending you into a pout. It must’ve been a tease because Wonwoo started to chuckle.
Suddenly, another figure entered the scene – a well-built young man, bundled in a navy blue parka that framed his figure in a masculine manner. He had a broad set of shoulders and a thin waist – oh, he definitely worked out. To make matters worse, he was handsome: a sharp jaw and slim nose, his eyes seemingly cold due to their shape, but his gaze, at least towards you, was soft and warm. A pair of matching navy blue earmuffs donned either side of his face; his hair was immaculately well-styled in a side slick despite the wind outside. Jeonghan wondered how much gel he must’ve used to keep it that way. The man greeted you with a few word, possibly a question to sit next to you as far as Jeonghan could tell, because you nodded and scooted over to make room for him. The young man is grinning, perhaps a little too enthusiastically, eyes curving into crescents and he settled in, shoulders bumping against yours. Wonwoo was smooshed up the side of the wall, seemingly displeased though continued to read uninterrupted. Jeonghan found it all the more interesting just how friendly and smiley you were with him relative to himself just moments earlier.
Jeonghan would never admit it out loud, but it kind of . . . infuriated him? An unsettling feeling overcame his chest, Jeonghan unknowingly shifting in his seat, fingers crushing the paper cup of hot chocolate a little tighter.
“You’re jealous,” Seungcheol said, approaching his best friend behind.
Jeonghan looked up then back to you. “Am not.”
“I saw you guys sitting together earlier,” Seungcheol remarked.
“Yeah – she offered.”
“Oh?”
“But then totally blew me off.”
“Yet, all chummy with Mr. Broad and Handsome, over there,” Seungcheol spoke his mind. He chuckled like the asshole he could be.
“Shut up, will you?” Jeonghan snapped.
“Jealous?” Seungcheol patted his back.
“Am not!” Jeonghan screeched a little too defensively.
Seungcheol shook his head, doing his best to suppress his growing grin.
“Then answer me this,” Seungcheol started, “For some reason, despite not knowing much about her, despite her ‘blowing you off,’ there’s a piece of you that still wants to get to know her better. Am I right?”
Jeonghan paused for a moment, considering his friend’s words. Never had Seungcheol made him feel so conflicted. It wouldn’t make sense for him to want to get to know you better after that rude encounter, but the tension from earlier was . . . thrilling? Also, in your defense, you weren’t exactly intentionally rude – he had accused you first of flaking on him, still unclear if you actually did or didn’t. It was kind of addicting and a piece of him was curious as to how far he could push you and vice versa.
An enigma he couldn’t resolve.
“I-I guess?”
Seungcheol clapped suddenly, each one staccato and slow. “And so, Yoon Jeonghan meets his match.”
“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” Jeonghan asked.
Seungcheol shrugged, “You’ll see – only time can tell.”
That’s what she said.
. . . .
“How did Jeonghan get my phone number?”
“He did?”
“Apparently, he did – but I didn’t.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“You tell me.”
Wonwoo shrugged.
“You said he was into me.”
“What about you? Are you into him?”
Silence.
. . . .
It’s the early spring, a month before graduation, when you see each other again – much to Jeonghan’s dismay.
Many things have changed, one of them being that Dami and Soonyoung started dating a couple of weeks after their traumatic encounter on the ice. They’re sickeningly cute, but the important thing was that they made so much sense. Though they were still early on in their relationship, it could very well just be the ‘honeymoon phase,’ but fights were far and few between. They were two wholesome souls with hardworking drives, lifting each other up, yet also somehow knowing what the other needs. All it took was a simple glance from across the room, Jeonghan would imagine some sort of telepathy going on between them before Soonyoung waddled over Dami and whispered a few words to her, her glum expression brightening instantaneously and vice versa.
Even Jeonghan couldn’t help but feel warm and fuzzy at the sight of them. A part of him was envious. Not in a toxic sense, but also longing when he’d meet his soulmate like that – not that he was some hopeless romantic and believed in soulmates or anything (he’d like to think had some agency in choosing his partner, rather than leaving it up to the good old hands of fate), but there was a nice feeling to the thought of being with someone who just got you like that.
Many things had also not changed, the main one being his perennial quest to get close to you.
Or perhaps rather, the lack thereof.
Jeonghan spent the last several months debating if he should contact you again. You blocked his number; would it be right of him to slide into your Instagram DM’s? You didn’t follow one another, however, which made things all the more complex.
Yet, your last few words lingered in the back of his mind: Life is full of surprises, Yoon Jeonghan. Only time can tell.
What did that even mean? Were you hinting at him to pursue you? Was that your way of avoiding him?
Ironically, Jeonghan relented and decided to leave this up to fate. Seungcheol urged him to reach out to you, claiming the worst thing you could say to him was ‘no’, but Jeonghan wasn’t sure he could handle that currently – not when you left off on such a weird note.
Maybe whatever gods out there were on his side, however, because Jeonghan ran into again at a karaoke bar. The two of you had more mutual friends than you thought – or rather really, you ended up being Wonwoo’s plus one to all these things, showing up glued to his hip.
Neon color lights dance across the dark room with tacky, faux leather orange benches, as Minghao and Seokmin sing a trot rendition of Beyonce’s ‘All the Single Ladies,’ the latter somehow acquiring a sogo drum and beating an out of tune rhythm across the room. You were tucked away in a corner wedged in between Wonwoo and that handsome man from the chalet again. Despite the lively energy, you were only quietly swaying, seemingly lost in another world. The handsome man (Jeonghan had come to learn that his name was ‘Baekho’) whispered something in your ear every now and then, maybe checking up on you, but you’d only respond with a tight smile, quick to divert your eyes from him to your hands. Jeonghan couldn’t decide if it was out of coyness or you weren’t truly up to being here tonight.
Jeonghan didn’t try to sit next to you when he arrived. For one reason being he’d arrived late so you were already settled and didn’t pay mind to him. The other reason being he didn’t want to raise suspicions trying to wedge himself between you and Baekho.
Just what was exactly your relationship with Baekho? With how he seemed to whisper so tenderly to your ear, Jeonghan was almost inclined to think you were dating, but your eyes seemed so . . . hollow? It wasn’t quite the same as the way Dami’s orbs lit up when she saw Soonyoung.
“Quit staring,” Seungcheol elbowed Jeonghan, interrupting his musing. Jeonghan winced, shooting Seungcheol a dirty look.
“I wasn’t,” Jeonghan remarked.
Seungcheol waved off his friend. “You should go talk to her – or at least say ‘hi.’”
“And why would I do that?” Jeonghan retorted stupidly, instantly regretting the words that just spewed from his mouth.
His best friend gave him an incredulous look. “This is the first time you see her in months and that’s what you’re telling me? Please! You’re about to burn holes into Baekho’s head with those laser eyes of yours – no one is not not noticing the way your eyes keep lingering over to them.”
“Who am I to interfere with whatever they have?” Jeonghan waved his hand at some abstract object in the air as if it represented your relationship with Baekho.
“Yoon Jeonghan – that’s who,” Seungcheol shoved him roughly, nearly sending him sailing out of his seat.
“Hey!” his footing stuttered and if it weren’t for his fast, he would’ve face planted into the table.
“Go!” Seungcheol hissed.
Eyes were already starting to linger on Jeonghan, the young man having no choice but to play it cool like he was getting up to go somewhere. Out of the corner of his eyes, he caught you looking at him momentarily, heating his spine up and making him feel stupidly giddy. He let out a quiet cough, relaxing his shoulder and slipping his hand into his jean pocket, stepping over people’s feet in your direction.
If he can’t put himself between you and Baekho, he’ll just ask Wonwoo to scoot over – no biggie, right?
Jeonghan was only about two steps away when he opened his mouth to greet you. However, you were quick to ignore him, shifting out of your seat and pointed to the exit of the karaoke room, whispering something quick to Baekho. He stood up, making room for you to leave and you scurried towards the opaque door.
Well, fuck.
“Your luck is terrible,” Wonwoo remarked. He scooted over to make room for Jeonghan. With a heavy sigh, the bleach blonde man flopped into the empty spot. If the others weren’t now belting Justin Bieber at the top of their lungs, you would’ve heard the hard impact between Jeonghan’s body and this godly uncomfortable bench.
“Well, gee – thanks, like I didn’t know,” Jeonghan replied sarcastically.
“I’m . . . impressed, honestly,” Wonwoo crossed his arms over his chest.
“About what?”
“You’ve never been hung up on someone for this long – let alone, not make a move,” Wonwoo explained further.
“Well I mean, I kind of left a sour taste in her mouth,” Jeonghan noted.
Wonwoo tilted his head to the side, glancing at his friend from the side. Jeonghan ceased to notice, both due to the way the light from the flat screen was dancing across his glasses and he was simply lost in his own heartsick musing.
“What did you do?” Wonwoo asked carefully.
“Didn’t she tell you?” Jeonghan scoffed. “I confronted her about her blocking my number.”
“She blocked your number?” Wonwoo said slowly – asking more than he was stating.
Ugh – why was he was playing stupid? Jeonghan thought you were good friends!
“Yeah,” Jeonghan kicked at the linoleum with the toe of his sneaker. “Shouldn’t you know that?”
Wonwoo kept a straight face, only nodding. He quietly noted that maybe he just forgot – he was busy these days. However, what Jeonghan doesn’t know is that Wonwoo was finally and slowly putting all the pieces of your prefatory love story together.
Oh, how miscommunication was an amazing plot tool.
“You should go check on her,” Wonwoo nudged Jeonghan after a moment.
“Huh?” Jeonghan knitted his brows together. “Why?”
Wonwoo shrugged. “She’s been gone for a bit – said, she went to get air. Tell her I sent you.”
Jeonghan narrowed his eyes on his friend. Just what was he playing at?
Wonwoo leaned in close, “Or would you rather me ask Baekho to go check on her?”
That was the impetus Jeonghan needed, snapping out of his suspicious daze and getting up from his seat.
It was now or never.
. . . .
You don’t seem to notice Jeonghan when he tumbled out the front door of the karaoke bar, leaning against the red brick wall, eyes trained up in the sky. Jeonghan looked up briefly to see what you were looking at, only to note the gray heavy clouds blocking the moon and the stars. The streets were starting to become more dynamic as people were filling up the streets. Young couples giggled, hand-in-hand, groups of friends bellowing out in laughter at inside jokes, while elderly shop owners pitched their tent – their grills starting to heat up the grease that were just slathered across them.
Yet, you only continued to sigh and look at the sky, your vibe not quite matching the eccentricity of what was going on inside or outside.
Jeonghan neared you, hands tucked in his jeans still, scuffing the dark pavement as he called out, “Hey.”
You look down and to the side at the sound of his voice.
“Hi,” you greeted him with a tight smile before looking away.
He teetered on the balls of his feet. “Whatcha doing out here?”
“I could ask you the same thing,” you said. This sent Jeonghan back to your conversation at the skating chalet. However, your tone is less lively and playful this time – half-hearted.
“It’s rude to answer a question by asking another question, you know?” Jeonghan joked.
You chortled softly, “It wasn’t actually a question.”
Jeonghan took another step towards you, opting to stand a few feet away from you, side-by-side. “Same difference.”
Neither of speak further, letting silence envelope you both once more and suddenly it just felt like him and you in this little space despite the night coming alive around you. The silence is different this time though, in that rather than tension, there was comfort – a mutual, unspoken understanding that it was just needed.
Jeonghan almost relished it, until his intrusive thoughts remembered–
“Wonwoo sent me to check on you by the way,” he blurted.
You smile small, “That bastard.”
“Huh?”
You looked up at Jeonghan. “Well, you checked up on me,” you gestured back to the building behind you. “You can go back – I’m okay.”
Jeonghan cocked his head slightly at you, a crease forming between his brows as he takes you in. There was a bite to all your responses, but it lacked your usual flair. He’s not sure what it was exactly, but something told him maybe, you weren’t as okay as you led onto be.
“What?” you asked when he didn’t reply or move.
Sometimes, maybe it was better not to think too hard about it, Jeonghan decided.
Maybe, he just needed to do what felt right.
“Do you . . .” his voice trailed off as he hesitated for a moment, but he picked up right again. “Do you wanna go for a walk actually?”
You were taken aback, shoulders settling back and your faux smile falling into a small pout instead.
Despite his cool and collected demeanor that he hoped he was displaying, in his head, he was quietly chanting, “Please say yes,” as if it was a mantra that would trance you into going on this walk with him.
Maybe it does work, however, because even though you don’t say ‘yes,’ you take off in a direction without him. Jeonghan froze momentarily, in disbelief and relief, jaw slack and small breath escaping his lips.
You must’ve sensed the lack of his presence behind you because you spin around, your jean pleated skirt twirling prettily in the process.
Cocking your head at him, you simply asked, “Coming?”
Maybe, Jeonghan should leave it up to fate more.
(Or just Wonwoo.)
. . . .
Fate was cruel.
And Jeonghan was over dramatic and impatient – at least, in Seungcheol’s eyes.
The walk that evening was rather uneventful, but it gave Jeonghan hope – so much damn hope. Initially, Jeonghan only tailed you until you asked him why he was doing that and he jogged to walk beside you. Naturally, your footsteps fell in sync, Jeonghan wondering if he was the only one who noticed. Far and few words were exchanged like at the skating center, but neither of you minded. Like prior, the silence was tranquil, bringing a sense of calm and comfort to the both of you. You seemed to relax, a genuine smile springing on your face as you passed various shops, eyes lighting up at the sight of the few bakeries and the few childish remarks of trinkets in the windowsill.
To be frank, and Jeonghan wasn’t always, even with himself, you were fucking adorable – and he wanted to know this feeling more. This sensation that melted his heart every time his gaze flickered over to you, this joy that fills his body and courses through his veins; yet despite all this heart fluttering sensation, there was a sense of simplicity and effortlessness that accompanied it all. It made him feel like he could do this . . . for a long time.
Maybe he was insane and beyond himself – he hardly knew anything about you, but he liked it. He wasn’t sure he felt this way before. He was a non-believer of love at first sight, but a piece of him wanted to defy this reality he knew. He wondered if this is how Soonyoung felt about Dami on the regular.
Jeonghan doesn’t find out why you were feeling down earlier that evening. Jeonghan doesn’t ask to exchange Instagram’s with you. Jeonghan doesn’t ask when he will see you again because he knew he would – he had to.
He reveled about you to Seungcheol. The short twenty minute walk felt like a lifetime; when it came to a halt and you arrived back at the karaoke bar and how he didn’t want to go inside, but he did anyway. He wondered what you did the next day and the day after. Did you go back to those bakeries with anyone? Did you buy that scarf you were eyeing through the clear glass?
But okay, maybe it was a mistake to leave it all up to fate. The thrill of it was quick to fade and entered misery and longing.
Jeonghan didn’t meet you again until graduation.
Countless, prolonged, corny speeches about the future and hard work given, long lines of people waiting for their empty diploma cases passed, a flurry of black caps thrown, tears cried, cheers shouted, and hugs exchanged later, Jeonghan spotted you in the middle of an aisle by yourself. You were waving good-bye to a classmate before you turned to walk down the path of green grass alone. Eyes trained on the ground, one foot in front of another, you unknowingly made your way towards him. There was a smalling, toothless smile on your face slowly fading with each step.
You must’ve sensed his presence because you stopped a few feet away. The smile returned, making Jeonghan’s heart skip a beat. His face mirrored your own, the world seeming to fade around the both of you once again.
“Hey stranger,” you quipped. He was holding his graduation cap in one hand. You note how his roots were showing, the bleach blonde growing and now shading over his eyes.
“Hey,” he greeted. Folding his hands behind him, he took a few steps closer towards you. He tipped his head forward, “Congratulations.”
You saluted him and sent a playful wink in his direction. “You likewise.”
Jeonghan chuckled. His eyes wandered up to the sky a bit as his next question formed. How did he ask this without making it too obvious?
“What are your plans after all of this?” Jeonghan asked. He held his hands out, gesturing to the field of new graduates greeting their friends and family joyfully.
“Um,” you chuckled, “Dinner with my family probably?” You scratched your head and looked around for them briefly before turning back to him. Your lips parted to ask ‘you’, but Jeonghan beat you to it.
“No,” Jeonghan chuckled, waving you off, “I meant like . . . future-future – career plans and all.”
“Oh,” you said, your voice much softer now. “That.”
Jeonghan tilted his head curiously.
“I’ll be . . . around,” you pressed your lips together and chuckled softly, “Um . . . I’m honestly not sure – what I had planned, didn’t pan out.”
There was a flash of worry across your face – Jeonghan probably presuming you were thinking he thought you were pathetic and a failure. However, that was not how he felt. If anything, his heart panged for you a little. He didn’t claim to know what you were feeling, heck, he hardly knew much about you still – Jeonghan would like to think he knew a thing or two about disappointment.
“C-can I?” he stammered. He opened his arms for you slightly, quietly asking for a hug.
Your eyes widened. “U-um.” Your feet were already clumsily tripping over one another towards him though.
Jeonghan pulled you in, your lips pressed into the shoulder of his graduation gown. Initially tense in his hold, with each breath, his woody cologne overwhelming your senses, the hug became more bearable . . . comfortable. You relaxed, bringing your hands up around his waist. You felt him patting your back gently as if to quietly reassure you.
“The world doesn’t just end because one plan went awry,” he offered.
You snorted and joked, “Just what I needed – another speech on resilience.”
Jeonghan pulled away, grinning at you really hard. He could’ve sworn he probably looked like an idiot, but he didn’t really care – this could be the last time he saw you ever.
“The world has a funny way of working out,” Jeonghan pressed on. “Fate . . . it isn’t too bad – most of the time.”
“Darling!” you heard your mother call from behind you. Instantly, your cheeks grew hot, already envisioning 101 scenarios as to how this conversation would go with Jeonghan meeting your family like this. Your mother in particular, was a fickle woman who had a lot of predictions.
“There you are!” your younger brother jumped on you, hooking his arm around your neck.
“Congratulations!” you heard one of your cousins shout as well, wedging celebratory balloons between you and Jeonghan.
Jeonghan chuckled to himself. His heart sinking a little – maybe this is all you and Jeonghan would be to each other.
“Who’s this, Y/N?” your mother asked, of course, first of all people and things. She gestured to Jeonghan. Her eyes were curious, scanning him up and down.
Your younger brother released you and you straightened yourself out. You waved for Jeonghan to hold up his hand to greet your mom.
“Mom, this is Yoon Jeonghan, my uh . . .”
What were you two exactly?
“Friend,” Jeonghan finished for you. “Y/N’s friend – we met through Wonwoo.”
“Friend?” your mom repeated suspiciously.
“Friend,” Jeonghan nodded in reassurance.
“Friend,” you said again – it left a funny taste in your mouth though.
“Well, pleasure to meet you,” your mom took his hand. Your dad, a kind, but quieter man, followed shortly after.
After some small talk, Jeonghan excused himself from your family, explaining he needed to find his own. He gave you one last longing look when he said goodbye, sending you off with a small wave of his shoulder. It was accompanied by a tender smile; a bittersweet tint to his eyes. It made your heartache a little, a sense of panic overtaking you when your family pulled you away.
You decided, you didn’t want this to be the last time you saw Yoon Jeonghan.
Yes, perhaps, he did mention moving to another city for his new job, but that didn’t matter. You didn’t want to lose this chance.
You asked your cousin to lend you a pen and hastily rip out a scrap of the placeholder in your diploma (it wasn’t your actual degree anyways – that would be coming in the mail after your finals were graded). Quickly, you scribble your phone number onto it. Folding it up, you excuse yourself briefly from your family, not caring if your mom noticed and would lecture you later about how girls shouldn’t make the first move and that if Jeonghan liked you, he would’ve already asked you out.
“Jeonghan!” you shouted.
He turned around, a few steps away from who you presumed was his family. They also tuned in, eyes turning to observe the interaction.
He was smiling, though evidently confused.
Pressing your lips into a thin line, you marched towards him and held up the folded paper in your hand, gesturing for him to take it. He didn’t take it. His eyes only flickered from you then the paper, then back at you.
When he doesn’t make a move, you reach for his wrist, pressing it into his palm and folding his fingers over, ignoring the way your cheeks felt ablaze.
“See you around, Yoon Jeonghan.”
. . . .
[Jeonghan]: You fucker
[Wonwoo]: Excuse me?
[Jeonghan]: [insert image]
[Jeonghan]: Your handwriting is HORRENDOUS!
[Jeonghan]: It was a 4 not a 6!
[Wonwoo]: LMAO
[Jeonghan]: Fuck you
[Wonwoo]: Hey – think of it as part of the plot. You’ll thank me later.
[Jeonghan]: Whatever
[Wonwoo]: Well???
[Jeonghan]: ?
[Wonwoo]: Are you just gonna curse me or are you going to text her!?
. . . .
[Uknonwn number]: Hi 🙂
[Unknown number]: This is Yoon Jeonghan – please don’t block me!
[Unknown number]: . . . um hello?
[Unknown number]: omg did i fuck this up again
[Y/N]: [your message not delivered]
[jeonghan]: well fuck.
[Y/N]: Haha – jk.
[Y/N]: Hi Jeonghan 🙂
. . . .
You and Jeonghan found yourselves texting daily and calling nearly nightly. It started out as simple banter, but evolved to mundane questions of what you ate for lunch to 3AM discussions ranging anywhere from your post-bac thesis to whether straws had one or two holes.
The calls at night were short on the weekdays, but they were disgustingly long on the weekends. Rather than going out on Friday nights, Jeonghan would make excuses to not go to the bar with his new colleagues as to just be able to talk with you on the phone for hours and hours. At some point, they caught on that Friday nights were reserved for you, teasing him about the much anticipated call as they left the office. Jeonghan being the seemingly transparent and nonchalant man he is, just chuckled and brushed it off.
Typically, he’d give you a ring around 8PM on FaceTime. He’d watch you cook, maybe even eat his delivery while you ate dinner, and you’d talk for hours thereafter about everything and nothing into the early morning hours, only stopping when you drifted off to sleep or he claimed he was aging prematurely and was tired.
“Hey, can I ask you something?” you whispered into your phone one evening. His end of the call was already dark, only a lamp in the distance illuminating his features. You peaked up to see him keeping one eye open underneath his bed of hair that was an ashy sombre now, blending his dark roots with a more neutral blonde.
He hummed softly, signaling he was still there. “Technically, you just did.”
You chortled. “Prick – maybe I won’t.”
“I’m kidding,” he raised his head to look at you. Sleep was heavy on his eyes, his lids weighing down. “What’s up?”
Biting the inside of your cheek, you decide to forgo the question that has been haunting you recently. You opt to redirect the conversation in another direction instead.
“I got an internship,” you told him.
This truly woke him off. “What? Y/N, that’s amazing! Congratulations! Where at?”
“Park Consultants,” you told him, “But, I’m not sure I should take it.”
“Love, what?” Jeonghan said, confused.
You pretend to bury you face in frustration, but you were really trying to hide the way your lips wobbled at the nickname: Love.
When did the two of you get this far?
Despite things going well between you and Jeonghan, there were always those thoughts that lingered in your mind.
It was clear, there was nothing ‘just platonic’ about your relationship, as Wonwoo had pointed out several times. “Just get married already!” he’d joke.
Yet, the unconventional nature of it, made you wary.
It was only when Jeonghan moved away did the two of you become closer and it didn’t sit well with you. You remember vehemently telling Dami you couldn’t do long distance relationships – you had trust issues and were the jealous type. Yet, here you were glued to your phone most times of the day you weren’t working to talk to him. Your perspective of him was limited to a small rectangular screen – was he really who he presented himself to be? Your mother had always warned you about men like Jeonghan too – charming and playful with a smooth tongue, but snakes behind your back. You wondered if he was seeing someone else. In technicality, it was within his right; the two of you weren’t anything in particular. She also told you once that girls should not initiate, but be pursued – at least from graduation on, that was definitely not your story.
“I wonder,” you stabbed your wooden spoon into your ice cream turning to Wonwoo, “Could it be that I just . . . like him because he reassured me at my lowest?”
You and Wonwoo had met up for ice cream. Tonight, Jeonghan’s family was visiting him, so he had told you ahead of time he couldn’t call as he would be spending time with him. The topic of you and Jeonghan resurfaced and you needed a reasonable sounding board.
“What do you mean?” Wonwoo sniffled, feeling the tip of his nose grow cold from the chilled treat.
“I just don’t want to end up being one of those girls who fall for someone because he was like, my ‘knight in shining armor’ who whisked me away when I was a damsel in distress,” you explained. “Graduate school didn’t quite pan out – I had just gotten rejected when we went on that walk that night we went to the karaoke bar and then graduation. I’m just worried I’m swooning for the wrong reason. I don’t want my relationship to be hinged on pity and depending on him.”
Wonwoo snorted, much to your surprise. Your expression was quick to change into a scowl. “What?”
“Are you hearing yourself right now?” Wonwoo pushed his glasses up the ridge of his nose. “When were you ever a damsel in distress? And if anything, Jeonghan was never and will never be anyone’s knight in shining armor.”
“I don’t think you get it,” you muttered, picking at the clump of cookie dough.
“Yes,” Wonwoo swallowed the ice cream left in his mouth before continuing. “You may have met him at your lowest, but that’s not what matters. He didn’t save you and you didn’t save him. Neither of you needed saving to begin with – you’re both capable of picking yourselves up in the situation as shown.” Wonwoo held out his hands, “The way I see it, he was the first person you could readily be vulnerable with and that is what matters. Someone you feel safe with – amidst other things of course. Y/N you could hardly meet up with me that week and Jeonghan did it in the matter of seconds. I think that says something.”
“But you know, my mom said–”
“Fuck what your mom says – trust yourself for once, okay?” Wonwoo rolled his eyes. To his defense, you’ve spiraled about your mother’s expectations for you to him many times before and it was tiring. It was rare that Wonwoo just swore like that. “Maybe he’s not the stellar, perfect future son-in-law she has preached your entire life, but that’s okay. Trust him – trust Jeonghan. Despite his annoying antics sometimes, he’s a good guy – he’s always been. If it’s meant to be, it’ll work out.”
. . . .
Jeonghan returned to the city almost a year and a half later for the holidays. The both of you try to arrange for plans to meet up, but in the spirit of the holiday season, timing doesn’t quite work out right due to family. Jeonghan invited you to his family Christmas party, but you suddenly became bashful, unsure of how he’d introduce you to his immediate family, let alone his cousins, grandparents, aunts, and uncles.
Friend? Girlfriend? Friend girl?
You declined politely, explaining to him it was too overwhelming. Gratefully, Jeonghan was understanding, promising to stay in town a little longer after the New Year’s for you – it made you feel all weird and tingling inside.
Like you were special.
Nonetheless, you were fated to meet once more before that as Minghao and his now fiance threw a New Year’s Eve party at his penthouse and you were both invited. You were unsure if Jeonghan would make it, however, as he mentioned his younger sister had a small celebration she wanted him to attend. You end up third wheeling Soonyoung and Dami to the party as Soonyoung offered to drive, but mingle amongst the others.
Just as you’re finding yourself getting more immersed in your conversation with Seungcheol and his girlfriend, the lighthearted and drunken banter regarding his tattoo experience was interrupted by a nerve wracking, but familiar, presence. Someone’s hand slipped around your waist, a warmth blooming across your body, the silver long-sleeved dress seemingly not so warm. Smile fading, you turn to the figure standing in the once empty spot on your left to find Jeonghan occupying the space with a playful smirk stretching from ear-to-ear. He gives Seungcheol an apologetic look and then pulls you closer into his side. The latter grinned, raising his cup in greeting and a silent good luck.
Despite his flirtatious advances, there was a glint of alarm and plea in his eyes. Your lips parted to question him, but he doesn’t let you. Instead, Jeonghan leaned forward, turning his head to better dip into the junction of your neck and shoulder. Whether it was intentional or unintentional, his lips grazed against the shell of your ear. The waft of soju about him stung your nose; the warm, small breeze from his small, hesitant breath made you shudder. You gripped your own red solo cup a little tighter, crinkling the edges in the process.
There was no ‘hello’, ‘I missed you’, and no wave. He simply leaned in and asked, “Dance with me?” His voice was low, loud enough just for you to hear as if he was sharing a secret no one else dares to know.
He was wiggling his eyebrows playfully when he pulled back to look at you. The way he tugged you towards the crowd in the living room, fingers hooking tightly with yours, told you there really wasn’t a choice.
Whether you want to or not, you were going to dance with him.
Jeonghan handed off his red solo cup to a random presumed man standing by, chatting up a girl in a strapless silver mini dress. The stranger looked confused, but Jeonghan didn’t mind – his eyes were trained on you, as if you were the only person in the room. The bodies bumping into him didn’t seem to bother him; his grip on your hand was unrelenting, fearful to lose you amidst the sea of intoxicated party goers. His roguish expression made your breath hitch; you had to consciously remind yourself to breathe.
Your musing was interrupted by Jeonghan’s sudden pull. Swiftly, your feet tumbled over one another and before you could register, you were flushed against his chest. Jeonghan brought up his hand, ghosting against the small of your back until his arm is fully wrapped around your waist.
“What are you doing?” you muttered, pressing a hand to his chest.
He grinned like you were the only thing at this party that brought him joy.
“That’s no way to greet a friend after so long,” Jeonghan frowned.
“Neither is sleazily dragging me onto the dance floor,” you faked a pout, “Consent in this day and age is sexy, Jeonghan.”
“Like you’d say no to dancing with me,” he teased. “But if you insist,” he stepped back and gave you a knowing look. “Would you like to dance with me, Miss Y/N?”
You giggled girlishly, nodding and extending an arm for him to come back.
He had a point – you’re not sure what you wouldn’t let Jeonghan do at this point.
The music suddenly slows, the fast and heavy beat melding into something mellower.
Fate was cruel, but sometimes, it was nice.
(Or maybe Wonwoo just requested Jihoon to DJ a slower song – just a thought.)
“How’ve you been?” Jeonghan finally asked. He peered at you, the lights bouncing off his dark irises. His steps slowed and you followed, rocking from side to side to meet the new rhythm.
“You ask that as if we don’t talk every day,” you remarked. You’re embarrassed, nonetheless, turning your head so you don’t meet his eyes.
“It has been precisely fourteen days and,” Jeonghan peered at his watch quickly, “twelve-ish hours since we last talked on the phone. A lot can happen in that time.”
“Yeah?” you challenged. “Such as?”
He smirked, wiggling his eyebrows playfully as he came to a halt. Hand slipping down to link with your own, he ran his thumb across your knuckles as he finally caught your gaze. You were nervous – or maybe, it was just the champagne coursing through your veins. Your eyes were blown wide and glossy, breathing shallow. You were still, holding your arms close to your body. He did wonder if there was a piece of him that fucked up.
“Could I show you instead?” Jeonghan asked.
He didn’t wait for an answer, only holding onto your hand firmly and weaving in and out of the crowd until you met a set of stairs that led you to the top floor of the penthouse.
Oh my god . . . he wouldn't, right?
Jeonghan moved to a room on the left, twisting the pearly white knob, and pausing briefly to make sure it was empty before entering.
He pulled you in, shutting and locking the door behind you. It was dark – only the city lights and slivers of the waxing moon slipping through the murky white tulle curtains. It lit up a slit from the large balcony window, tracing a path to Jeonghan and you, who were now pressed up against the door.
He was awfully close – one tip of your chin and your lips would touch.
Wait – what!?
Why were you thinking about kissing him?
The franticness of it all must’ve been evident on your features, Jeonghan’s sly grin only growing further, eyes curving to mimic the moon. There was a wink of light in his dark brown orbs – warm, mischievous– before he pushed away, tucking his hands into his suit pants.
“Just kidding,” he finally quipped.
You let out a small breath and ease away from the door.
He pointed a teasing finger at you, “You were flustered, weren’t you?”
“Shut up,” you grumbled. Your palms grew sweaty and the tips of your ears grew hot. You were about to turn and open the door again, when you heard Jeonghan quietly call for you to wait.
You spun around to face him again, finding him scratching his temple, he turned back to face you. “That’s not why I brought you here.”
“Huh?” you questioned.
“I figured it was time to ask you, um . . . be an adult about it,” he continued. Jeonghan smiled at you, his lips in a tilt as he was amused but trying so hard to stick to the agenda. He muttered, “Wonwoo said you would never get it until I asked like this so . . .” Before you have a chance to question him again, Jeonghan sunk his teeth into his bottom lip, inhaling sharply. “Look, I’m not the best at being . . . uh, explicit about my feelings, but for you, I figured I could be, but um . . . say, uh, what do you say, love?”
And your world stopped, breath hitching. Your dress suddenly felt too tight.
What did he just call you?! Again!
“I . . . like you a lot and I have for quite some time now, if you haven’t noticed,” Jeonghan pressed on. He exhaled deeply, letting out a quiet whoosh. Jeonghan tilted his head back and fidgeted for a moment, eliciting at a quiet chortle from you. “What if we tried this . . . dating thing? Yeah?”
The tension Jeonghan felt now was unbearable. It was different from the one at the skating chalet, different from the one at the karaoke bar. Like a rubber band pulled taut to its wits end, he was barely holding on as your quietness ensued.
You suddenly start laughing, throwing your head back in guffaw and slapping your knee. Jeonghan was a bit scared – both just of you and what that meant. Did you not feel the same? Was he the one who got played?
Did he really just rearrange his life to be rejected?
Heels clicking against the wooden floorboards, your laughter died down as you made your way towards him. Each step felt so long and far away, but it was only a matter of seconds before your arms were wrapped around his neck. Your fingers played with the fringes of his back hairs, eyes gazing up at him – indecipherable, if he was being honest.
Maybe Jeonghan wasn’t as good at reading you as he thought.
Taking him by surprise, you placed a chaste kiss on his lips. It was brief, but it burned – it was efficient if your goal was to suck all the air out of Jeonghan’s lungs in the matter of the two seconds your lips touched.
That or he was just stunned at your boldness – it was hard to predict.
“You look nice with black hair, by the way,” you noted when you pulled away. Your ran your hand through the front fringes, then teased them back into place.
“What–”
You tiptoed, giving him another kiss – this one longer. He wasn’t prepared, stiff at first, but quick to lean into it and adjust himself to better slot your lips together. Jeonghan gripped onto your waist, the material of your dress bunching into his hands.
“Took you long enough, asshole,” you muttered in between pecks when you pulled away. Jenoghan’s lips chased after you, not quite ready to let go.
“Hey! Your best friend was the one who gave me the wrong number,” Jeonghan shot back. “We could’ve been dating two years ago.”
“Not my fault he writes like a third grader,” you chuckled.
“He said it was for the plot.”
“Can we just stop talking about Wonwoo when we’re kissing? It feels kind of weird.”
“You know, if you think about it, he’s kind of the main character without being the main character.”
“Okay,” you pulled away, pushing at his chest lightly.
“Wait!” Jeonghan giggled, “Come back – I’ll stop.”
“If we stay here any longer, people will get the wrong idea,” you tried to come up with an excuse.
Jeonghan wiggled his brows playfully, pulling you back. “Like I care?”
. . . .
[Present]
“So, that’s why the joke was that Nina was conceived that night,” Wonwoo explained to Leah.
“But she wasn’t because timing wise that wouldn’t make sense – I didn’t carry her for a year and a half,” you interjected. You quickly added, “We didn’t do anything either – just kissed and Jeonghan’s social battery was low so we stayed there until midnight and then I fell asleep.”
“I get that – don’t worry,” Leah waved you off. “But . . . uh, the two of you got married pretty fast then – only a year of dating, huh?”
You and Jeonghan looked at each other, gaze softening.
“Yeah,” Jeonghan shrugged nonchalantly, “I mean that and a year and a half of missed opportunities and pining, but . . . I dunno, it just made sense.”
You nodded in agreement.
“That’s sweet,” Leah smiled, “I’m glad it worked out for you guys in the end and you got that job to bring you back here. Fate is so quirky sometimes.”
“Babe,” Wonwoo shoved a spoonful of chocolate cake into his mouth. His words were garbled, “Please don’t make them sentimental – they’re kinda gross and sappy when they get into it.”
“Uncle Wonwoo, mommy says no talking with food in your mouth!” Nina exclaimed.
He gave the little girl an apologetic look and swallowed . . . without chewing.
Three pairs of eyes widened, the little one not thinking much of it.
“Did you just–” Y/N started, but was too stunned to continue.
“Are you okay?!” Leah exclaimed. She passed him her own glass of water. Wonwoo wiped the corner of his mouth and smiled sheepishly, first at her then you and Jeonghan. “Please don’t choke – we’re getting married in less than a month!”
“Mommy, mommy! Can I try?” Nina exclaimed.
“No,” you deadpanned. Nina knew that voice, going back to play with her spoon instead.
Jeonghan guffawed, “Holy shit, I can’t believe you’re marrying him!”
Woonwoo gave him a dark look, gesturing to his daughter. Anyone who knew Wonwoo knew he didn’t like cussing, let alone, around children. “Language,” he scolded.
. . . .
[Bonus]
“Hey, I have a question for you,” you stated as you wiped the wet cup. Jeonghan had his nose stuck in the dishwasher, making sure all the items were arranged appropriately.
“Hm?” He waited for you to continue.
“We all know why I fell for you, but . . . what made you fall for me? At first, that is,” you asked. “I feel like I never got a clear grasp on that.”
Jeonghan grinned, standing up from his crouched position. He stepped towards you, planting a hand on your waist. “That’s easy.”
“Is it?” you raised your eyebrows, curiously.
He hummed and nodded adamantly. “I thought you knew.”
“Well, you’re not the most forward about everything,” you noted.
“You remember the perilla leaf debate?”
“Yeah.”
“It was that,” he explained, “Dami had asked and your answer was that you’re the jealous type, so you’d peel it for everyone to avoid bad vibes and hurting your own feelings – and while saying that, you were actually peeling the perilla for everyone.”
Your jaw grew slack, swatting at him with the dish towel. “That’s it?” you exclaimed.
“I mean, it was an added bonus that you were kind of cute,” Jeonghan joked.
“You suck.”
“What? I love the self-awareness and honesty!”
#jeonghan x reader#jeonghan fluff#jeonghan scenarios#jeonghan angst#seventeen x reader#seventeen fluff#seventeen scenarios#seventeen angst
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"Four Crows Investigation" - Kaz Brekker x Reader
[vulgar language]
[Part 2 - Lovebirds' Outfox]
☽ REQUESTS ARE OPEN ☾
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SUMMARY: After Nina makes a passing comment about Brekker’s heartbeat, three crows join her in an investigation to uncover the true nature of your relationship with Kaz.
WORDCOUNT: ~ 1.4k
>>Grishaverse-inspired playlist<<
Sitting around the table, leaning forward in a secretive manner, the four Crows look nothing short of a conspiracy. Their appearance is in no way deceptive - that’s exactly the reason for their meeting. Nina looks between Jesper’s and Wylan’s shoulders, checking whether you and Kaz are in any way suspicious of their gathering. For now, you look a little too preoccupied with each other. Time for the final conference.
The Heartrender leans even further towards her friends, looking between them with a questioning gaze. She seems to be the most excited about this ‘secretive investigation’, as she called it a week ago, but that should not come as a surprise - all of this has been her idea from start to finish. The moment she noticed Kaz’s heartbeat significantly pick up when you showed up in a ball gown in an attempt to mix in with the immorally wealthy crowd at the banquet, Nina simply had to know more. Her friends, although reluctant at first, joined the scheme out of their own meddling.
“So, what did you manage to find out?” She’s trying to keep her voice quiet but the sheer excitement makes it difficult.
“I still don’t understand why we’re doing this,” Wylan stutters out while shaking his head gently. He may be part of a crime syndicate now but spying on his friends, and his boss, just seems too far.
“Because we care about them?” Jesper asks with fake worry in his voice. Then, a devious smile appears on his face. “And we’re morbidly curious.”
“Can’t we just ask them, then?”
“As if either of them is going to say something,” Inej grunts. Knowing both of you fairly well, she never expected a straightforward question to get anything outside of a snarky comment or a side-eye.
Nina impatiently taps her hand on the table. “Alright, who goes first?”
╚ Jesper’s Evidence ╝
He knows Kaz is going to get angry the moment he walks through the door but, at the same time, Jesper’s kind of out of options. As much as he hates to admit it to himself and definitely will not do it aloud, he’s facing an impasse.
The moment he pushes the door open, your and Kaz’s eyes snap towards him. He makes a note of your shoulders - brushing against one another as you’re standing over scattered papers, a little too close for practicality or for the closeness to be accredited to accident. You’re definitely giving the impression that he walked in at an inconvenient moment.
But Jesper is good at bluffing, never giving away that he noticed the thought-provoking lack of space between you. “Carliogne won’t talk unless he sees the contract you signed with Bruglione,” he informs. “His reasoning is that we’re probably trying to fuck him over.”
Kaz stares at him for a moment with an unreadable expression. “We are,” he finally answers.
“Well, he doesn’t need to know that for now, does he?”
“It makes sense,” you speak up. Pondering, you nod to yourself. “If he sees the contract, he’ll become less cautious and playing him should be even easier. Just wait a second,” you wave your hand at Jesper, “I think I put it in the bottom drawer.”
The moment you crouch behind the desk, Jesper’s eyes catch movement - Kaz is covering the edge of the table over your head with his hand. Considering that he’s looking at papers in the opposite direction, he might not even be aware of this little habit. The gunslinger stifles a smile. Nina is going to love this.
Soon, you stand back up at the protective hand reaches to flip through a wad of documents as though nothing has happened. Extending your arm towards Jesper, you offer him the folded contract between your two fingers.
“Please, don’t get it stained.”
“Can’t make promises,” he says with a cheeky smile as he snatches the paper from you.
Jesper hears your groan right before he closes the door behind himself.
╚ Wylan’s Evidence ╝
Wylan rarely got ‘field work’ aside from setting up explosives. The out-of-ordinary occasions were stake-outs, when he’d sit in one place for hours on end waiting for something to happen, having only Jesper’s company to pass the time - not that there’s anything wrong with that. In fact, that’s the only part that makes those ‘patrol duties’ bearable.
Although he feels uneasy creepily watching, he’s supposed to wait for an agreed-on sign to carry out his part in the plan. And with Jesper gone to the bathroom, the responsibility of staying vigilant is his only. Sitting on the carriage bench, he has a good view of the street but most of his attention surrounds a certain table at a boulangerie near the junction. You and Kaz are doing a great job at looking common - just drinking coffee, chatting, completely run-of-the-mill people and definitely not hardened criminals ready to call their companions to action when their prey is in sight.
Wylan suddenly sits up, hardly believing the scene unfolding before his eyes: you offer Kaz your bagel and he just… bites it. No glares, no scowls, he just takes a bite and you continue the conversation. Maybe Nina was right and something is up.
The carriage shakes slightly as Jesper gets back on it. “What did I miss?” he asks in an upbeat voice.
╚ Inej’s Evidence ╝
It’s the middle of the night but Inej rarely works at other times. Only one thing stands between her and the comfort of her bed - Kaz. She’s well-aware that he’s still going to be working at this hour, making her wonder once more: when does he rest?
Kaz seems to be expecting her as he doesn’t even flinch when she barges into his office. He just looks up at her for a moment, only to return to writing something. Inej is about to tell him what Lorenzzo Carliogne had been up to during the day, when her eyes focus on a surprising singularity: the daybed standing in the corner of the office, used as an additional shelf or a desk most of the time, is occupied. First, she realizes that it’s you sleeping on it but then another, a much more interesting detail, catches her eye in the dim candlelight of the room - you’re covered with a coat that undoubtedly looks like it belongs to Kaz.
“I take it there’s a reason you’re here at this hour?” Brekker brings her attention back to himself.
“Yes,” she starts, sparing you one last glance before looking at Kaz, “Carliogne lives with his wife and three children. Staff comes in through a separate pair of doors, only the main chef and butler have keys to it. There’s a rotation in guards during lunch.”
“Good,” he answers. Kaz looks up at Inej but again, it’s just for a moment - his focus is soon directed at the papers in front of him.
A silence falls. The thought to inquire about you, the daybed and his coat passes her thoughts but an instinct dissuades her from doing so. Because realistically, what sort of answer would Kaz give her anyway? It’s better to spare herself the snark and just go to bed.
The four friends look between each other, curious whether all of them came to the same conclusion. Tense excitement hangs in the air. There is a certain aspect of juvenile nosyness that entices them, making this whole over-the-top operation fun and not just a gossip convention.
A pout twists Nina’s face. It would have looked sad if it wasn’t for her raised eyebrows, making her expression more compassionate than woeful. “They’re so in love it’s kind of embarrassing,” she announces.
Three pairs of eyes follow her pitiful gaze to the faraway table where you’re sitting with Kaz, oblivious to the interest the Crows have in you. It looks like you’re retelling him a story, gesturing wildly with one of your hands, while the other is kept on the table, underneath his gloved fingers. Kaz is just nodding along, answering something shortly from time to time.
“Just look at them,” Jesper says with a sense of misguided pride as though he had some contribution in the makings of the couple. He’s shaking his head with amusement. “How could we ever had any doubts?”
“Do you think they know that we know?” Wylan asks quietly.
Inej shrugs. “I don’t think they care.”
#kaz brekker x reader#kaz brekker x you#kaz brekker fanfiction#kaz brekker imagine#kaz brekker fanfic#shadow and bone#shadow and bone fanfiction#shadow and bone fanfic#shadow and bone x reader#shadow and bone imagine#shadow and bone x you#sab#soc#six of crows fanfic#six of crows x reader#six of crows imagine#six of crows fanfiction#six of crows#six of crows x you
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he just sounds like that
Kaz Brekker x Fem!reader (established relationship)
synopsis: Arrogance has no place on a job, but you let it lower your guard. You pay the price, but Kaz helps bring you back.
I kind of like merging Book/Show Kaz and trying to keep accurate to his mannerisms and humour etc so hopefully this is good. I came about this idea after thinking about this scene from TLOU and how Kaz most definitely had an asshole voice. Also, I will probably make a few parts/drabbles about Kaz x Inferni Reader, because I love Kaz no apologies.
Warnings: Mentions of Slavery, reader reliving her time as a slave (briefly), Mentions of scars of wrists from slavery chains etc, A fumbley understanding of the technology of the time and inferni powers (it's been so long since I read the books)
Getting split from the other crows was distressing, but there was nothing you could do about that now. You and Kaz just had to keep going, trying to work your way back to the rendezvous point.
"Tell me again why you thought this would work," You hissed to Kaz, who had been leading you in a circle for what felt like forever.
Kaz gave you an irritated glare, "It did work."
You scoffed, "Yeah, that's why we're lost in this saints forsaken mansion."
Kaz let out an exasperated sigh, "Are you done?"
You and Kaz had known each other for years, the entire time you'd known each other you bantered like this. Kaz would act all irritated and stern, but you knew he silently liked the way you could relieve tension and make even him crack a smile. As the only two Crows born and raised in the farmlands of Kerch, you shared a different connection. You had found each other before The Barrel knew Kaz as the force he was now. Kaz had saved you from Slavers and convinced you to join the Dregs, helping you find a life without fear.
Since then, you followed him through everything, which at this current moment, meant even through the merchant's maze of a mansion. Nina, Matthias and Wylan were somewhere outside, waiting for you, Kaz, Inej and Jesper to get what you were after and meet them. You wondered if they would be growing impatient yet, you were late, which almost never happened on a job with Kaz.
The job had started off as most others, breaking in was always the easy part. You had been privy to Kaz's plans, watching him study a map of the mansion for weeks before he committed to the job. He knew the place like the back of his hand, but he didn't know the extent of the new security measures the merch had introduced.
You and Jesper dawdled behind Inej and Kaz as they led the group through the halls. Occasionally Jesper would pause at a painting or display piece and make comments about its ugliness or stupidity.
The last painting he'd criticized was of an older man, dressed in a bright blue kefta with red embroidery. Jesper had caught your sleeve and pointed it out to you, "Looks like the merch has inferni ancestor."
You had screwed your nose up at the portrait, "I thought he was Kaelish?"
"He is," Kaz said, already at the end of the hall with Inej. He was waiting for the two of you to catch up, like a boy calling his dogs home.
Walking through the mansion felt surreal, mostly because you hadn't been to many places with such decadent displays of wealth. The four of you could move through the hallways unnoticed because the Merch and his family were out at the theatre - or whatever it was rich people did in Ketterdam on Sunday Nights. He had brought most of his guards and men with him, leaving the halls silent and unpatrolled. Kaz had called him an arrogant fool, to declare his mansion impenetrable and then take all his men out to prove it. There was no place able to keep out Dirtyhands, especially not when he had his crows by his side.
Thinking back on it you realized how you all had been too arrogant, thinking this job was in and out, easy. You'd let your guard down - something Kaz warned you to never do in this city - and now you were paying the price.
Everything went wrong when you and Kaz finally found what you were looking for - the merch's family jewel, a sapphire embedded in rich Kealish gold. You had easily broken through the fabrikator-made lock, it might have been made by a Grisha but it couldn't hold up against a Grisha. Especially not one who could melt metal with the same ease as cutting pastry. Kaz had reached for the jewels, as soon as he lifted it off the display the room filled with an ominous hum. Like the sound of a machine slowly whirring to life.
Kaz had pocketed the jewels, grabbing your forearm and tugging you along behind him as he went for the door Jesper and Inej were guarding. Before you could make it metal bars slid down over the doorway. You had tried to use your small science to melt the metal, even Jesper tried to budge it, but nothing worked. Kaz ordered Inej and Jesper to find their own way out as alarms chimed, directing you back through the room to another exit.
You had followed behind him willingly, knowing he knew the way around the mansion. You'd been irritated to learn how wrong you were, Kaz knew the layout of the mansion but the Merch had updated the floorplan. Clearly, another Fabrikator addition to hinder thieves.
"Wait," Kaz held up his hand and you barrelled straight into his back at the sudden halt, "Do you hear that?"
Footsteps.
"Back," Kaz whispered, ushering you back the way you had come.
You got to the end of the hall before you heard more bodies approaching, you were surrounded. Immediately you went to the window, trying to pull at the latch and open it. It didn't work, but you could see light dancing on the tree line.
"Kaz," You called, "Look."
You both squinted into the dark, trying to distinguish who it was in the woods. You saw the glint of steel, like someone was spinning a revolver.
"It's Jesper."
The footsteps were getting louder, there was no way you and Kaz could get out of this on your own.
"Step back," You struck your flint, the sparks allowing you to create a ball of flame. You concentrated it as small as it would allow, pressing your palms against the window until cracks started forming. After a few more seconds the pane shattered, sending the shards falling to the ground below. You were on the second floor, even if you wanted to jump there was no way you and Kaz would be able to land safely. You settled for sending up a burst of flames, Jesper and the others would be on the lookout for it, your SOS symbol.
"Stop!" Someone shouted and all hell broke loose.
You and Kaz fought well side by side, you both knew each other's moves, working in tandem to take down opponents. It looked like you might win for a little while, then a woman rounded the corner with her hands pressed together. Heartrender, you realized it too late.
You were woken suddenly, like your heart was all of a sudden coming back to life. You gasped and spluttered, lungs burning. Your hands were bound above your head, separated by a thick metal rod so that you couldn't summon. Already you could feel the ache in your shoulders, hanging from your arms was something you had been used to when you were a slave. Now, you had to fight back the panic that tried to grip your heart.
You struggled to find your footing for a moment, but eventually managed to stand up enough to take the strain off of your wrists.
Kaz.
Where was Kaz?
"Look, Brekker. Your girls fine."
You squinted to find where the voice was coming from, finding the source across the room. Kaz was standing opposite a burly man nearly a foot taller than him. Kaz's face was bloody and bruised, but he had murder in his eyes. You could see it, feel it, all the way across the room. You realized it wasn't just Kaz and the merchant; the other crows were there too. Inej held a blade against the heartrenders throat from earlier, who had both her hands held far apart to show her cooperation. Jesper was not too far away, his pistols in hand as he stared down a man who stood in between you and him.
What did I miss?
"No harm was done," The merchant continued, his voice thick with a Kaelish accent, "What do you say we part ways, unharmed."
Kaz's face didn't change, "Sure."
The Merchant frowned, a glimpse of fear breaking through his resolve, "I don't like your tone, boy."
"He always sounds like that," Jesper joked, glancing at you.
"He has an asshole voice," You agreed. Not two nights ago you and Jesper had been saying the same thing to Matthias at the Slat. You and Jesper enjoyed teasing the Fjerdan, especially regarding Kaz and his 'demjin' ways.
Kaz looked amused, he had the Merchant in the palm of his hand. "Go. Before I change my mind."
The Merchant almost tripped as he ran away, not even stopping for his Heartrender and right-hand man who followed behind him just as quick.
With the immediate threat gone, you felt your resolve begin to crumble. You had to get out of these chains. They would rub your wrists every time you moved, bringing you straight back to your past.
"Stop moving," An older woman had warned you, "It hurts less."
She was probably right, but you were too terrified to listen. Hours ago you were playing on your family's farm, but now you were chained to the roof in a dark, damp cellar. The chains were rusted and coarse, they rubbed the skin around your wrists raw, leaving cuts and grazes everywhere they pressed.
You were only eight, by far the youngest of all the slaves in the cellar. The chains they used to bind you didn't have cuffs, the slavers had just looped the links around your wrists and locked them tight. All you felt was the pain and the fear. All of this because you were Grisha? You only just learned of your power as an Inferni, how could you be worth anything?
The older woman tried to console you, doing her best to quell your tears and sobs, but even she knew the horrors that awaited you. The horrors you would spend years fighting to escape.
"Y/N," Kaz's voice was soft, he stood in front of you, supporting your weight as Jesper worked on freeing your hands from the chains. "Stay here."
You knew he was trying, you could see his own emotions clawing at him. It was one of the things that bound you and Kaz together, the demons of your past. You understood what it was like to fear touch and he understood what it was like to be betrayed. You helped each other, through the flashbacks and nightmares. You two didn't have anyone else, so you fought to have each other.
When Jesper finally broke through the chains, you lurched forward unexpectedly. Kaz held you tighter, trying to keep you upright even with his bad leg. You stood up, holding your hands out to balance yourself.
'I'm okay," You lied, trying to avoid Jesper and Inej's worried glances, "We should get out of here."
Back at the Slat, you sat staring at your cup of cocoa. Nina had made it for you as her way of trying to help, she could hear that your heartbeat hadn't stopped racing since leaving the job.
Jesper and Wylan had offered you gentle conversation, but you couldn't hold it for long. You had claimed you were tired, bidding your friends goodnight and climbing the stairs to your room. You didn't stop at your floor. Your feet carried you further up the steep stairs, stopping when you reached the attic which Kaz had converted into his own room. You didn't have to knock, you just opened the door and announced yourself.
Behind closed doors, Kaz was less concerned about keeping up his Dirtyhands persona. He smiled ever so slightly as you sat on his bed. A few months ago you had forced him to rearrange his room so that you could see him working while you lounged on his bed. You often ended up like this, watching him work after long days and taking comfort in each other's presence.
This time, Kaz wasn't concerned with his papers, he just looked at you, waiting for you to talk. You had talked Kaz through his own episodes many times, you never pushed him or asked him to move quicker than he was ready. For the first time, Kaz wanted to offer you the same comfort, but he wasn't sure if he could.
You were rubbing your wrists, stuck in your own memories of your time chained.
Kaz slowly joined you, giving you time to pull away. You glanced over at him, watching him as he slowly removed his gloves.
"Kaz-"
Kaz shook his head to silence you, continuing what he was doing. He placed his gloves neatly on the bedside table, turning to you. He reached out slowly and you let him. He gently pried your fingers away from your wrist, taking your hands in his own. He turned your palms up, his fingers slowly ghosting over the scars on your skin.
Kaz could feel the warmth of your skin through his fingertips. It helped him fight off the flashbacks, the warmth reminding him you were safe, healthy, alive.
Kaz's fingers traced over a scar on your right thumb. You couldn't help the small sigh that escaped your lips.
Kaz's head snapped up to look at you, fear filling his eyes.
"I'm okay," You meant it this time. The flashbacks were gone, locked in the vault in the back of your mind.
Kaz could tell that you meant it, see the anxiety leave your face. He drew his hands back, reaching for his gloves again. You smiled at him as he slipped his hands back into them, the leather bringing him the comfort he needed.
Kaz offered you a quiet apology.
"Kaz," You couldn't help the adoring smile on your face, "It's okay."
You knew Kaz could handle contact more when his gloves were on, so you gently took his hand. Kaz watched as you copied his movements from earlier, gently opening up his fingers. You slowly raised his hand, pressing a gentle kiss to his palm.
"I love you," You said, "Gloves and all."
Kaz smiled, a genuine smile that you only saw in the safety of these four walls.
He let out a quiet reply, "I love you too."
#six of crows#kaz brekker#six of crows x reader#the crows#kaz brekker x reader#shadow and bone#shadow and bone x reader#kaz brekker x you#kaz and jesper#jesper fahey#six of crows jesper#wylan hendriks#jesper x wylan#wesper#wylan van eck#nina zenik#matthias helvar#helnik#crows#grishaverse#shadow and bone s2#shadow and bone s2 spoilers#pekka rollins#kaz dirtyhands brekker#bastard of the barrel#sab s2 spoilers#sab s2#sab
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Hoax
{Part 2}
{Fandom: Grishaverse}
{Pairing: Kaz Brekker x fem!reader}
Summary: Kaz Brekker didn’t need a reason. But this time he had one. He had a reason to want to push Helvar off a cliff because he kept making Y/N smile and blush. Kaz just didn’t want to admit the reason was jealousy.
“Your faithless love's the only hoax
I believe in
Don't want no other shade of blue
But you”
There was something churning in his stomach, something Kaz was becoming quite familiar with lately. It had first started when he had seen Matthias talking with Y/N.
There was a smile on her face, cheeks flushed as she animatedly talked to him about something.
Kaz did not know what they had been talking about because as soon as he saw them, his stomach dropped and his heart twisted painfully in his chest.
The feeling had only gotten worse since then. And so had Matthias' advances. Kaz didn't know what was going on with the fjerdan but he seemed intent on following Y/N around lately.
It was driving Kaz up the wall, but not because he was jealous. Kaz was absolutely not jealous of the blonde-haired beef slab of the man who Y/N granted her smiles and laughs to as if they were free currency.
He was not jealous that Matthias could touch Y/N's bare hand so casually, so easily. Kaz Brekker had no reason or right to be jealous.
He was just...concerned. Yes, he was concerned that Matthias would distract Y/N from her job and he could not have one of his best crows losing focus.
That was all.
Kaz's head snapped towards the kitchen where Y/N's bell-like laughter sounded, his feet carried him towards the sound before he could decide against it.
His lips thinned into a scowl as he noticed just who was making Y/N laugh. Kaz, for the life of him, could not figure out what the dour fjerdan have possibly said that had Y/N bestowing him with such a wide smile.
Something on the left side of his chest hurt at seeing that smile directed at Matthias. And the churning in his stomach was back. Great.
He should have just left Matthias in Hellgate.
"Kaz" Y/N noticed him, and finally, finally, Helvar stepped away from her as she motioned to a bowl of what looked like cookie dough mixed with too many chocolate chips, "we are making cookies"
"Don't burn down the kitchen" Kaz gritted out, earning an eye roll from her but the small smile playing on her lips told him she was far from annoyed. His traitor heart did that unusual thing it did whenever she smiled at him.
"As if, Y/N's the best baker in the barrel" Nina comments as she enters the kitchen, scooping some of the cookie batter with a finger and licking it off.
"Nina!" Y/N chastises the heartrender, even as a blush spreads on the apples of her cheek. There's an unbearable itch in his fingers to just lean forward and put his gloved fingers on those red cheeks, just to see if the colour could spread further.
The thought leaves him as soon as it came, beaten away to that dark corner of his mind he doesn't bother looking at anymore.
Kaz ignores the nausea that follows the thought.
Nina winks at Y/N, leaning across the kitchen counter and planting her lips on those lovely cheeks as she sneaks in another scoop of the batter.
"No more, Nina or you won't get any cookies" Matthias scolds her, taking away the bowl as Y/N swats at Nina's arm, who only offers her a wry grin.
A horrible feeling seeped into his bones as he watched Y/N with Matthias and Nina. He was an outsider to this world, their world where Y/N did not spend her sleepless nights in her boss' office, sitting in an uncomfortable chair but instead in the embrace of two familiar faces.
Wordlessly, he slipped out of the kitchen, the weight of the cane clutched painfully in his hand grounding him to the present as he trudged up the stairs.
"Kaz" Y/N's voice called out from the bottom of the stairs. Kaz released a sharp exhale and turned to face her.
It was never easy. Looking at her, feeling so much and not being able to say anything. She looked at him with concern shining in her eyes, the deep set of her brows furrowed, "you could stay until the cookies are done, it won't take long"
"I have work to do" the thinning of her lips in resignation was a sharper blade than any knife she could have stabbed him with.
"Right" Y/N nodded once, looking down at the ground, Kaz could almost feel her wringing her hands behind her back, a nervous habit she had picked up lately. Before that, she used to fiddle with the sleeves of her coat.
His coat.
The coat she had borrowed from him on a heist because hers had been torn and he had just never asked for it back. He didn't want to.
She still wore it whenever she went out. It suited her. His coat suited her.
Kaz swallowed the lump in his throat.
Y/N opened her mouth, as if to speak and then closed it, deciding against saying whatever was on the tip of her tongue. She looked up at him and turned around, walking away from him.
Kaz ignored the empty space in his chest that she left in her wake.
The scratching of pen on paper was the only sound heard as Y/N knocked on Kaz's door, a plate of cookies in her hand.
"Go away, Jesper"
"It's not Jesper"
A silence followed before Y/N heard him whisper, "come in"
Kaz was sitting at his desk, eyes focused on the paperwork, dark hair styled back with a few pieces falling messily in his face.
Y/N's heart hurt at the sight, a rush of affection overcame her and her lips pursed at the sight.
Damn Brekker, damn him and his devastatingly handsome face. And his thrice-damned heart that was guarded more securely than the Ice Court.
"I brought cookies"
"I don't like cookies"
Y/N raised an unimpressed eyebrow at him as she placed the plate of cookies on his desk, a safe distance away from his paperwork that was sprawled everywhere, "I didn't take you for being a bad liar, Kaz"
"Your baking is aptly edible but I don't trust whatever Helvar put in these" Kaz rasped, finally looking up to meet her eyes.
Y/N rolled her eyes, a fond smile on her face, "He didn't bake them, I did. He was just keeping me company"
"He has been been doing that a lot lately, keeping you company” Kaz scowled, unable to help himself, his grip tightened on the pen in his grasp.
"Is there a problem?" Y/N’s lips pursed in agitation, she had a feeling Kaz wanted to say something but he wouldn’t. He never did.
"No, there is no reason yours and Helvar's companionship would be a problem” Even saying the words left a bitter taste in his mouth.
But it was the truth.
There was no reason for Kaz Brekker to be jealous of Matthias or Nina or anyone who made her smile and blush. And yet he was.
He was jealous.
The realization made him clench his jaw and look down at the papers on his desk, even as his gaze was unfocused, “close the door on your way out”
It was a clear dismissal. And sharp. Too sharp.
Y/N nodded, biting her cheek to stop herself from saying something that she would regret later. That they would both regret later.
She had a poisonous tongue, a stark contrast from her sunny disposition and she never wanted to say something to purposefully hurt anyone of the crows.
They were her family, even if one of them was being particularly petty today.
She really needed to do something about her stupid crush on him.
“Enjoy your cookies” Y/N gritted out as she turned to walk away, “or choke on them” she added, bitterly.
Sometimes, she really couldn’t help herself.
She had clearly not meant for him to hear the last part but he did. He watched her walk away, forehead creased in frustration at his own shortcomings.
#kaz brekker x reader#kaz brekker x y/n#kaz brekker#six of crows#six of crows x reader#matthias helvar x reader
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CALL ME WHAT YOU WANT 𓆩♡𓆪
(Book #1 of the Hellfire Gentlemen’s Club series)
strip club owner!eddie x fem!exotic dancer!hargrove!reader
𝐌𝐎𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐍 𝐀𝐔 18+ MDNI
Chapter 020: ‘Red Thong, Party’s On!’ (Epilogue)
a/n: pov you’re back at hellfire, but this time you’re sharing the stage with eddie, stripping while he plays a song for you to dance to 🤭🤭♥️ (SURPRISE AT THE END) it’s been a WILD ride my loves, thank you all so much for the support for CMWYW. i hope we all continue to create more beautiful things together. readers, writers, artists, creatives of all kinds keep the world going round. 🤟🏼💋 all my love, maddy
MESS WITH HER? SHE’LL FUCK YOU UP
↳ chapters: 001, 002*, 003** , 004**, 005 , 006 , 007* , 008**, 009, 010, 011, 012* , 013**, 014** , 015, 016**, 017, 018, 019, 020*
CW: strip club behaviors hehe, grinding, pole-dancing, ass-shaking, all that hellfire goodness, implications that shy girl c*me on eddie's guitar
word count: 990 words
♡
Mom always used to say, "Inside of you, there are two wolves: a good one and a bad one. Depending on which mouth you feed, one will triumph the other.”
She left out one thing, however: sometimes being bad feels so fucking good.
“We’ve got a verrry special treat for you tonight folks!” the DJ announces. “She took a break for a little while but now she is BACK… and here to stay with us, FOREVER! Put your hands together for the ONE, the ONLY — Hellfire’s Princess — SHYYY GIIIIRL!”
And the crowd goes wild.
You emerge from the side stage in your glimmering scarlet set, flipping your plump, bouncy locks around as you dip your hips to the beat. Your regular customers swoon as you blow them kisses, and the petty kisses you issue to the Hellfire Girls (they came to pick up their severance checks) leave them shaking in their stilettos.
"WOOO, HARGROVE!" Nancy cheers for you backstage, dancing to the song as she curls Nina's hair.
"LET 'EM KNOW, BABY!" Nina shouts after her.
You acknowledge them with a wink, giving one to Chrissy as well as she cheers for you on the opposite side of the stage, bouncing up and down in her sexy Hellfire cheer uniform.
“Let’s go, Shy Girl!” ‘Cherry’ cheers as she waves her pom-poms in the air. "LET'S GOOOO!"
She's hot! Can’t stop! Up on stage doing shots!
You shake your ass when the song calls on it, grinding your hips to the beat to match the lyrics as they come. The crowd hoots and hollers as you dance, showering you in dollar bills as you make the pole your bitch for the night.
“YEAAAH!” Max cheers. “That’s my sister!”
As you glide down the cylindrical silver steel, you wave to the crowd and thank them all for coming out.
“Thank you! Aww, thanks so much! OMG, how are you? Long time no see!”
But just because you’re doing your thing on stage doesn’t mean you aren’t paying attention to the happenings beneath you. Because while you have a bird’s eye view of Vecna’s Lair, you can’t help but fix your gaze on Lucas, who is dressed rather sharper than usual tonight, going up to Maxine in attempts to ‘rizz her up’.
“I see spiciness runs in the family,” Lucas remarks to her as they stand beside each other in Vecna’s Lair.
The self-proclaimed 'Dark Chocolate' shoots her an awkward wink, to which Max responds with a grimace on her face.
“Genetics wasn’t playing ‘bout y’all,” Lucas continues. "You're looking mighty fine tonight, Max."
“Thanks. I guess,” Max shrugs, refusing to entertain it. “But, if you knew anything about family dynamics and DNA, you’d know she’s my step-sister."
"Psh," Lucas scoffs. "Yeah! Yeah, I knew that."
"Course you did," she jeers. "Stalker."
“Stalker?! I thought we were friends.”
Max rolls her eyes. “Whatever this is, is far from platonic.”
She begins to strut away, giving Lucas the opportunity to race after her. And Sinclair wastes no time, pushing himself past the sea of sweaty men to catch up to the beautiful redhead in front of him.
“So there’s a chance we can be more than friends?!”
You chuckle as you watch it unfold from the stage. Then you turn to everyone else.
Argyle and Jonathan give you two stoned-filled waves hello. You wave back. Henry whose the designated bone-snapper bouncer tonight blows you a kiss. You catch it and return the favor. Mike and Will don't even give you the time of day.
You then turn your attention to Dustin who is both head-banging to the song, and holding up a lazily written message on the black screen of his phone: “I AM LOOKING RESPECTFULLY”. You can't help but giggle. It's like he's a mini Eddie.
Speaking of your boyfriend, your eyes dart back to the side stage where you meet Eddie’s gaze.
She likes to pull my hair when I make her grind her teeth.
You watch as the curly-haired, metalhead-turned-strip-club-owner eyes you steadily, situating his guitar around himself, giving the body of his NJ Warlock one more wipe down with a cloth.
He smirks to himself, satisfied at the thought that only you two know why that guitar needed wiping down in the first place. But he’s mostly pleased with the fact that, despite the long list of handsome, eligible bachelors after your heart, the passionate, down-to-earth, sexy, siren of a woman that is you, is all his.
My girlfriend's a dick magnet. MY girlfriend…
Eddie then takes to the stage, using the same fingers he’ll use to ravage you tonight to strum the chords of the sexy guitar solo of the song — you know, the song about a guy…..with a hot stripper girlfriend…..whose seducing everyone around her while she does her thing…..in that beautiful red set.
“HOLY SHIT!” someone from the crowd raves, causing Eddie’s eyes to light up like a little kid. “DUET OF THE CENTURY!”
You’ve healed so many parts of Eddie that he was too scared to explore: Love after Isabelle. Showing him that self-care is just as important as caring for Wayne. Encouraging him to find a hobby outside of Hellfire that didn't include doing payroll or grocery shopping. And healing his inner teenager by letting him play on stage with you, as he relives his glory days as the guitarist and frontman of Corroded Coffin one last time.
And as Eddie continues to strum, he stays thinking of you. He couldn’t wait to heal more parts of himself…with 'Shy Girl' Hargrove by his side.
“So,” you pant, edging closer to your boyfriend as the music draws on. "What's next after this?"
Eddie smirks. As the instrumental allows, he presses you against his body, kissing you softly against the lips before trailing all the way down your neck. Your breath hitches in arousal as he hums against you.
“Whatever you want.”
The End
SIKE! King Steve has entered the chat… 😉
CALL OUT MY NAME ♛
(Book #2 of the Hellfire Gentlemen's Club Series)
CEO!bachelor!steve × fem!college grad!reader
MODERN AU • 18+ | BOOK #1 (e.m.)
slight age gap (Steve is 31, reader is 23); reader goes by the nickname "Sweets"
*loosely inspired by sara cate’s salacious players club*
Summary: 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐈𝐒 𝐀 𝐆𝐀𝐌𝐁𝐋𝐄. Steve Harrington has the WORST luck with the ladies. His high school sweetheart left him for another dude, his former fuck buddy is dating his roommate, and his dream girl is a lesbian. King Steve is losing hope. That is until he meets you — a newly graduated university student from Seattle — when your paths cross on a fateful night in Sin City. What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas... that is until your risky business trickles over to Hawkins, Indiana, a town your best friend knows of a little too well.
theme song: call out my name by the weeknd
tag list is open 💌✨
PREVIEW
♛
Winter 2024
“WATCH OUT INDIANAPOLIS — you're about to get... absolutely SOAKED!”
The booming voice of a man in Steve’s bedroom stirs him awake.
Letting out a ferocious yawn, The King rubs his eyes free of the annoying crust in the corner of his sockets, flopping around one more time before doing his routine stretch.
“Google,” Steve commands. “Turn off the TV.”
The TV immediately switches off. It’s nothing personal to meteorologist Marcus Bailey, but if Steve ever needed an accurate forecast of Indianapolis, all he would have to do is look outside his penthouse window. And that, after brushing his teeth, is just what he does.
"G'morning Indy,” he sighs happily on his balcony before going back inside.
Steve then makes his way over to the kitchen to fix himself some breakfast.
“Google,” he calls out again. “Open the curtains, please.”
Google replies:
“Opening curtains. Good morning — Steve.”
"Google, what's my schedule looking like today?" "Google, text Dustin." “Google, what is the weather looking like in Nevada?” “Google, turn on my shower tunes.”
The best thing about not living with Eddie Munson anymore, is that Steve can shamelessly sing Amy Winehouse in the shower without being hounded about it.
“We only saaaid GOODBYE, with WORDS!” Steve sings, confidently off-key. “I died a hundred times! You go back to her, and I goooo baaack toooo…”
"Scanning fingerprint...”
an automated voice announces at the entrance of Steve's walk-in closet.
Swish...
The door slides open. Sauntering his way inside, Steve ventures for some slick black athleisure down to the shoes, his usual musky cologne, and some matching sunglasses (despite the gloomy forecast prediction).
Black. 🎶
Steve Harrington is ready for the day.
---
"Google, make reservations for 3 people at Tony's Steakhouse at 7pm please."
All Steve had left to do for the day now was grocery shop. Which was always a hassle. Because sometimes, the store doesn't have the specific brand he's looking for so the shopper has to opt for an alternate version. Or sometimes, the shopper assigned to him that day chooses produce that is nearing its expiration date making every fruit in his bag a mushy mess. It doesn't happen too often, but it sure feels inconvenient as hell when it does. There are worse problems in life though, so Steve really can't complain.
*Ring, ring. Ring, ring*
The very distinct and custom ringtone has Steve bolting across the room to answer the call. One of his best friends was on the other line.
"Yello?" he says into the phone.
"Hey, it's Shy Girl," comes a voice. "Eddie and I are pulling in."
"Pull off to the side. Valet's got it. I'll send you guys up."
A bottle of cabernet sauvignon a la Steve awaits the pair when they make their way over. Consider it a Tony's pre-game.
"GameWorld stock is up 4% today,” Steve's buddy, and owner of Hellfire Gentlemen's Club Eddie Munson announces as the two clink glasses. "I don’t have much faith in it though, figure I’ll get my pie slices from actual grocery stores. Like Meijer.”
“Everyone's always gonna need groceries,” Steve points out. "Definitely. Just don't day trade. Not now."
"Ooh, you hear that, Eds?" Shy Girl nudges him. "You gotta be careful where you put your money."
"I gotta be careful with my money, period," Eddie smirks. "You're a danger to my pockets, angel."
"Oh but you love me," she says.
"Yeah," Eddie gives in, grabbing his lover's dainty digits, trailing his fingers across hers, and rubbing the glistening rock that took up most of her left hand on the distal side. "I sure do."
"I'm just... so proud of us," Steve sappily reflects. "So much has happened over the past two years and we've all come so far."
"Yeah," Shy Girl agrees. "And it's about fucking time we celebrate."
"I agree," Eddie chimes in, raising his glass once again. "This weekend trip is going to be... one for the books."
"Viva Las Vegas," Steve toasts. "Cheers."
"Viva Las Vegas!"
SEATTLE, WASHINGTON
Black and red.
They're the two colors that occupy your closet the most. But of course, after graduating from Washington State University (or Wazzu, for short), you expected nothing less.
You could do with some more sequins though, you think to yourself as you pack your bags.
"What do you think of this, Sweets?"
Peering over your shoulder, you see that your best friend, Elle has started festivities early, managing to hold two glasses of champagne in one hand, and six-inch stilletoes in the other.
"Can't take the party out of the girl, that's for damn sure," you respond.
When you left Seattle to attend WSU Pullman, Elle was your only friend in business class. Mainly because the class was predominantly for dudes, but eventually you found out that you two have a lot in common.
Elle is everything you would want in an older sister figure: she is both book smart and wise, she is sexy, and she eats men for breakfast. And, now that she's about to celebrate the launching of her lingerie business (along with her Dirty 30s Era), and you're about to enter your new-grad era, you two are hitting up Las Vegas to go ham together one last time.
It's all so bittersweet. You owe everything to the Warrens, having taken you in when you were a lost undergrad. It also sucked quite a bit not having a support system after graduating high school. You and Elle were all each other has. Which makes this inevitable separation so much more painful.
"Are you sure you're okay with Vegas by the way?" you question. "I know since the split, being surrounded by gorgeous girls 24/7 can kinda be triggering.”
"Don't worry about it, love," she shakes it off. "The past is in the past. This is a new era of me."
Cheers to that. Clinking your airport-pregame champagne glasses with one another, you raise a toast to yourselves, celebrating how far the two of you have come over the past four years.
"To friendship."
"To friendship."
"To being elegant and educated."
"To elegance and education."
"And to being girl-bosses for the rest of our lives."
You giggle as you raise your glass of champagne even higher.
"To being girl-bosses for the rest of our lives," you two take a sip at the same time. "And no matter how near and no matter how far, we're always gonna be besties."
"I love you, Sweets."
"I love you too, Isabelle."
🏷️ tag list: @chrrymunson , @the-fairy-anon , @ali-r3n , @corrodedcoffincumslut , @bebe07011 , @mmunson86 , @eddiesguitarskills , @chelebelletx , @imonhereforareasonsadly , @eddies-trailer-babe @motherfckerr , @jxpsi , @sidthedollface2 , @manda-panda-monium , @elvendria , @micheledawn1975 , @hereforshmut , @siriuslysmoking , @mediocredreams @nymphetkoo , @m-chmcl-rmnc , @ahoyyharrington , @keepittoyourselftellnobodyelse @kellyxo1 @emsgoodthinkin @winchester-angel @chloe-6123 , @redbarn1995 @angietherose @kiyastrf94 , @purplewitchcauldron @kellsck @joyfulfxckery @munsons-mayhem28 @dragonfire @emma77645 @drivelikenina @livosssblog @thinkingth0ts @hugdealer @ellielunamckay @xblueriddlex @maskofmirrors @babyloutattoo89 @queenofhawkins @feral-pumpkin-energy @bl0ssomanddie
divider from: @plum98
#eddie munson#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson fanfic#eddie munson fanfiction#eddie munson smut#strip club owner! eddie#stranger things#stranger things 4#stranger things fanfiction#stranger things fanfic#eddie munson fanfics#joseph quinn#joe quinn
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Headcanons for Toby, Jeff, Nina and slendy with a reader that lovesss animals? (and is good with them) :D like every time they return from a mission, reader has brought back a puppy or kitty? (bonus points if once she accidentally brought a wolf in the house mistaking it for a dog)
Pastas with a s/o that's good with animals!
Toby, Jeff, Nina and Slenderman
A/n: I LOVE ANIMALS! ALL ARE SUPER CUTE but sadly I'm not very good with them lolol I have a cat and a dog though they're my babyss hope you enjoy!
Slenderman
🐾 He does not get along well with animals, at all. He scares most them away just by standing there, problems of being a eldritch horror but once one warms up to him he actually is very gentle with them.
🐾 finds it cute and fascinating how well you can interact with the lil fellas, might even find a way to you to use them in missions. Not a fan of you bringing them to the mansion though, most pastas aren't a fan and may be allergic, and he does not enjoy when animals/wildlife are being mistreated so for everyone's sake, he'll ask you not to.
🐾 If you manage to convince him to have a pet, other than smile dog that is, he would like a cat, probably a black or tuxedo one, because it would be easier to hide the fur that will be all over his clothes
🐾 He's a tidy man, animals that make much mess are not his type, he also don't like the high maintenance ones (i.e hamsters) heck he barely takes care of his proxies, leaving most of them to survive on their own only giving the best ones a somewhat stable life. A high maintenance thing that's not even useful?? Hell no
🐾 Overall, he likes animals but he does not like to take care of them nor have them in his house, he doesn't need more little, bratty, short life-span beings to take care of, he already has the proxys
Toby
🐾 Adores animals as long as they're far away from him, he's scared of most of them at first but find them cute
🐾 Have a strong cat allergy poor thing can't be near one without a mask and he's sneezing
🐾 Will help you take care of them despite his fear and allergies, mostly by being on your side handing you stuff but he'll hold the animal still if you need to apply a vaccine or something
🐾 Sometimes his tics will be saying an animal name, because he's spending so much time listening to you talk about them, you find it cute
🐾 He's besties with the mansion permanent pets and will let them stay in his room if needed
Nina
🐾 BIG ANIMAL FAN, especially big ones
🐾 WILL pamper all the pets you bring home, to a point where you have to hide the treats from her otherwise she'll give them nonstop
🐾 Begs Slenderman to let you make a zoo with all the pets, he refuses of course but lets her keep a parrot
🐾 She named the parrot Willy, is a blue one and he's very talkative (much like his owner) surprisingly he can roam free and don't run away/get lost.
🐾Willy will attack on command, Nina did not teach him how to do that but one day she said to another proxy "I'll make willy take your eyes out!" And the birb was near and he just attacked going for the eyes. A moment of laughter and panic later, Willy was safe and the poor victim just had his eyelids slightly clawed, nothing major but Slenderman made Nina promise that she would never command willy to attack a proxy to a degree that can compromise their performance. So now she just makes him poop on people's foods and/or in them
Jeff
🐾 He only likes dogs, not much of a fan of any other species, he will tolerate birds and most of the wild life thought
🐾 He's afraid of cats, whenever you bring one to the house he'll try to act cool but the slightest movement towards him will make him flinch
🐾 Will act uninterested when you bring a dog but the moment you turn your back he WILL gush over them specially if they get along with Smiley
🐾 Fights everyone who criticizes your actions, because "at least animals are better than humans" bedsides you do all the work to care for them and keep the mansion permanent pets safe if they don't get along with the strays
🐾 will complain if you spend more time with the pets than with him, and will throw a tantrum if you tell him to wait because you have to take care of the lil ones before giving him attention
#creepypasta#creepypasta headcanon#creepypasta x reader#slenderverse#slenderman headcanons#slender mansion#slenderman x reader#nina the killer headcanons#nina the killer#nina the killer x reader#ticci toby x reader#ticcy toby#ticci toby headcanons#jeff the killer x reader#jeff the killer headcanons#jeff the killer
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Zoya: the theater group that was supposed to come for the anniversary of the end of the Ravka war cancelled, i promised a play!
Nikolai: don't worry, i got this
---
Zoya: remind me never blindly trust an "i got this"
Nikolai: why? they are making a good job on the effects, and they will do anything for money
Alina: shhh! my big moment is comming!
Jesper with a long white wig: But my beloved Mole-
Wylan whispering: Mal-
Jesper: There has to be another way!
Wylan shirtless and with a six pack painted on his belly with a marker: There is no other way, Alina. Its your fate and dying for you its mine, as said by the cool and not at all awful tattoo of mine
Mal: I wasn't shirtless when i died
Alina: in my mind you were
Jesper: i can't do it!
Wylan: you must!
Jesper: okay! (fakes stabbing Wylan who fakes a collapse) oh Mal, Rakva will honor your braveness, and i will always remember how much i love your abs...and personality and all that shit
Alina snifs: its like they were just there
---
Zoya: so..why did she choose that role?
Nikolai: she said it she wanted a loud range of emotions
Nina with a big fake black kefta: Join me, Alina Starkov! join me to the shadow side , HAHAHAHA!
Zoya: at least practicing her evil laugther actually paid up
Jesper: Never! you just will just steal my power!
Nina stomping her foot; but why won't you give it to me?! why-won't you give it to me!
Mal: and...now "the darkling" is crying like a baby...at least they got that right
Nina: You need me! you need the shadow!
Jesper: no...this is..BONE! (fakes stabs Nina)
Nina: noooo! i am dyiiing....nooo, why didn't i bring a blade proof kefta, nooo
Nina fake coughing: Alina...please...do something for me...
Jesper fake crying while an onion slips from his fake kefta: yes?
Nina: "cough" tell...Zoya...to give that little grisha, Nina Zenik (the cutest one) all the waffles she wants (fakes a collapse)
Jesper: now its my time to die too, Tamar. Tolya, bring me my boytoy
Mal: excuse me? "man toy" please
Kuwei enter the scenario while dragging Wylan around
Tolya: is he supposed to be me or you?
Tamar: he has an undercut, so probably me-
Kuwei: Sankta Alina, we can cure you! I can cure you with my axe!
Kuwei turning around,showing a sidetail on the other side of his face: this makes me want to do some poetry
Tamar: oh, he is both of us, like the detail that the arm playing me is more muscular
Tolya: its literally not-
Jesper: no...i´ll die, my job here is done
Kuwei as Tolya : but my saint! you can't leave us!
Kuwei turning around as Tamar: Ravka is still a mess
Jesper: And thats your problem now, so long suckers! (fakes to die over Wylan´s body as Kuwei cries)
---
Inej with a fake blue kefta: i hope all of you know how lucky you are to be on my pressence
Zoya: this whole play is awful, all our portrayals are so one note and exagerated, we are not like that on real life. My eyes are too good for this sight
Inej : A triple funeral, a country with no money (flips her hair) my eyes are too good for this sight
Zoya: everyone shut up
Matthias with a cardboard crown: Oh yes, and i am the king now, i was hidden to treat my injuries completely unrelated to demonic possesion and (looks up at cue cards) improbable...i am a pearl...something , something...charming
Nikolai: who let him play me?
Kaz with a cheap red wig and a patch before the big curtain falls : and i...was ruination
Zoya: always the need to have the last word
Genya clapping: as "she" should
#shitpost#grishaverse shitpost#to clear possible confussion the crows are all in the play#everyone else is in the audience looking#shadow and bone shitpost#netflix shadow and bone#six of crows#leigh bardugo#crooked kingdom#grishaverse#sab shitpost#zoya nazyalensky#nikolai lantsov#kaz brekker#jesper fahey#wylan van eck#nina zenik#inej ghafa
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cruel summer: nico hischier x devs!player
you loved spending your summers with nico in switzerland. this summer was no different.
except nico’s ex-girlfriend was in town and made it her mission to spend every waking moment with him.
you found out she was back one morning when you were seated outside his childhood home with his mother, katja, learning some swiss-german.
nico’s ex had spotted katja and shouted a greeting, running over to the older woman and embracing her in a hug.
katja returned the gesture, although she did furrow her eyebrows when she looked over to you. the woman was shocked to say the least at her arrival.
“andrea, i didn’t know you were back. how are you?” katja asked gesturing to take a seat next to you.
andrea smiled and took the seat, not even looking at your side. “well i missed this place so much, i thought i’d get on the next flight and come home,” she explained.
you weren’t sure whether to introduce yourself or to leave, so you sat in silence until luca came out and noticed andrea.
“y/n, nico and i are going on a hike do you want to - andrea?” the older hischier brother stopped and looked between you and andrea.
the woman in question got up and launched herself into luca’s arms “oh i’ve missed you luca! it has been far too long since we’ve hung out,” she cried.
whilst andrea was preoccupied with luca, katja leaned across to you and whispered “i don’t know why she is back but i would tell nico to watch out,”
and katja was right.
for the past two weeks, andrea would come over to the hischier house early in the morning and follow nico around like a puppy.
whenever nico was sitting next to you andrea would be on the other side of him. if he needed something andrea would hurry to get it for him.
you never actually got a chance to talk to her until tonight. two weeks after the girl had made her appearance, katja and rino were having a dinner to celebrate your extension with the team.
“i don’t think we’ve formally met, i’m y/n, nico’s girlfriend,” you introduced yourself, holding a hand out to her.
andrea shot you a smile, which you could tell was fake, and returned the gesture. “andrea. i thought you were his teammate?” she questioned.
luckily, nico was behind the two of you and answered her question. “she is my teammate and my girlfriend,”
the answer made you smile. so you leaned up and pecked his lips, leaving your boyfriend a blushing mess.
that night, andrea continued doting on nico which made you feel like a bad girlfriend. upon reflection, you realised nico spent most of his time taking care of you than you did taking care of him.
that night you texted jack.
it was almost immediate when he replied your plane ticket attached and the promise to pick you up. he also assured you that your doctors appointment had been booked.
there were only five people who knew about your secret. nina, katja, your mother, ellen and now jack.
with a sigh on your lips and a quick glance over your shoulder, you thanked the hischier family for accommodating you before luca drove you to the airport.
nico woke up to a cold bed and a pit in his stomach. he thought you might’ve joined his brother on a morning walk but when he saw luca trailing in without he worried.
“where is y/n?” he asked.
his family didn’t say anything. it didn’t help that andrea took that exact moment to walk in and place a kiss on nico’s cheek, despite him pushing her away.
“she’s gone,” nina replied, grabbing her plate and bumping into nico’s ex. she had enjoyed spending time with you and was excited for what you had planned for tonight.
nico was stunned. you wouldn’t leave him like that, not after everything you’ve been through.
“what a shame, she seemed like a nice girl. nico i wanted to tell you alex and hannah wanted us to join their date,” andrea butted in.
rino left the room to call you and katja just shook her head.
“stop it!” nico yelled.
“all you’ve done since you’ve been here is folllow me around and it’s annoying. now get out of my house, i don’t want to see you!” he continued.
andrea faltered suddenly before she made her way to the door, embarrassed of her actions.
“luca, please tell me where she is,” nico pleaded with his older brother.
“she went to michigan,”
nico booked the next flight out with only one thought in mind. he took a cab to jack’s house hoping his friend could help.
but luke answered the door and near slammed it in his face again.
“luke please, i just need to know if she’s okay,”
but luke left the door and called his oldest brother. quinn, being the more level headed brother walked out of the house to talk to nico.
but before quinn has the chance to close the door and drown the inside noise out nico can hear you yelling.
“luke hughes you did not just tell a pregnant woman to lie on the floor!”
those words made nico freeze but quinn just shook his head and told nico to follow him.
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hi! can i please request a kaz brekker x reader fic based off of episode 5 of season 2 (despise your heart)? when kaz panics in the market reader finds him and takes him somehwere safe and gives him his gloves, and in that moment kaz kinda of realizes how he feels about the reader. and then the poison fog the reader hallucinates about kaz and him finally making physical contact and giving her love and she thinks it’s real until someone shoves the antidote in her mouth, once she regains consciousness she rushes over to help kaz and kaz sees her pulling him out of the water and the readers just sitting there holding his face and anything else you wanna add !
if it’s a little complicated i understand, thank you have a great day :))
You were always in plain sight
❀ Word Count: 2,145
❀ CW: Panic Attack, Discussions of Trauma, Pining, Admissions
❀ A/N: Added a few more scenes than requested. I hope you enjoy!
He’s going to panic, you think to yourself.
In fact, his body was already panicking, even if he wasn’t. Nina is too focused on the target's heart rate to notice, but Kaz’s heart rate has been slowly increasing ever since he took off the gloves.
You watch as the woman they were meeting with gets up, and Kaz goes to follow. Unfortunately, another woman immediately runs into him, spilling tea all over the front of him, and definitely accidentally touching him.
“Give me his gloves,” You whisper to Inej.
She hands them over silently. You put on your own set of gloves, a pair you keep on you in the event something like this happens.
Nina places her hand on top of Kaz’ and you watch the life drain from his face. And then he’s running.
“You follow the target. I’ve got him.” You say.
It doesn’t take you long to catch up to him, but by then he’s already completely disassociated and in complete panic. You take him by the arm, leading him to an empty alley, careful only to touch the clothed parts of his arm. Even with your hands in gloves, you are worried any kind of touch to his exposed hands will send him spiraling further.
He collapses to the ground in an unceremonious heap.
“You were supposed to follow her,” He says.
“Inej has it covered.” You reply, sitting down on the opposite side of the alley, a decent distance from him.
There’s a moment of silence before you add, “Someone had to follow you. You can’t be by yourself when your…” And you don’t know how to finish the sentence. Traumatized? Panicking? Having a PTSD flashback to an event you refuse to discuss with anyone? “...like this.”
It pains you to see him so deep in his own pain, so desperate to keep other people out of it. To keep you out of it. You place his gloves close to him, but far enough away that it doesn’t look like you’re trying to touch him.
He notices your gloves, “When did you-?”
“A while ago. There just in case-” And you cut yourself off with a sigh. In case this happened. “Do you want me to stay?”
Yes? Kaz thinks, but he’s still panicking too much to say anything. In fact, the thought sends him into even more of a panic, because he’s not ever had a thought like that before.
“I’ll be on the other side of the alley. We’ll regroup once you’ve had a chance to calm down.” You say, leaving him to decompress.
XXXXX
“Nina wants an explanation,” Inej tells you as you watch over Kaz from a distance. He’s finally come out of the worst of it and is now trying to act like nothing happened. It’s a behavior that you simply have never gotten used to, despite years by his side.
“Then tell her the truth.” You say.
“Which is?” Inej asks. She sometimes thinks you know more than she does, but that’s not really true. You both know exactly the same thing about Kaz- which is that Pekka Rollins killed his brother and that he absolutely cannot stand another person’s touch.
“He had a panic attack.” You reply. “She’s not going to tell the others, is she?”
“No. But I think Jesper should know. He hates it when we leave him out of the loop.” Inej states.
“I think I’m going to try to talk to him this time. See what else is going on.” You say, watching as Kaz sits down, clearly deep in thought.
“I’m not sure that’s a good idea.”
“I didn’t think you’d be happy about that idea.” You say, cleaning the dirt from under your nails.
“He will open up when he’s ready.” Inej tries to reassure you.
“We both know he’d never be that vulnerable.”
“Then why ask?” She asks.
So I know how to fix it.
“Let’s just get this over with, shall we? The world isn’t going to save itself.” You state, heading towards Kaz and the rest of the group to figure out the plan. Maybe you’ll ask him once all of this over.
XXXXX
“We should talk about what happened in the market.” You say, sitting on his desk.
“Must we?” Kaz replies, lowering the newspaper he had been reading to meet your gaze.
“Yes.”
He set the paper aside, making his way over to you. He towers over you in a way he’s never done before, closer than he’s ever been. “What do you want to know?”
“I want to know what happened.”
“You saw what happened,” He says as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world.
“I want to know why, Kaz.” You respond.
“Why?” He retorts. Is he flirting with you or just trying to get under your skin?
“I want to fix it. Or prevent it or- I don’t know! I just. I never want to see you like that again. I don’t want to see you suffer.”
“It won’t happen again,” He reassures you, a gloved hand coming up to caress your face. You block it with the back of your forearm.
“Won’t it? Jesper told me what happened when you got thrown in that cart together. I watched as you tried not to panic while helping Inej clean her wounds. Do you think I can’t sense your heart rate when people get too close to you? That I don’t know exactly how your body reacts? Who hurt you so badly that you can’t even be physically near another person without wanting to vomit?” You ramble, letting out all of the questions and feelings you’ve been holding inside for all of these years.
“Pekka Rollins” He replies, the answer he gave you before. It’s always been the answer, and in some ways, it really is the truth.
“Kaz… I just want you to let me in. You carry so much inside of you that you let nobody see. But I want to see it… I want to understand.” You say, and you want to reach out and hug him but you know he can’t receive that kind of affection.
But then he does something you aren’t excepting. Slowly, he begins to remove his gloves. He sets them on the fireplace, one by one. One of his ungloved hands traces its way up the side of your neck and rests on your cheek. You gasp at his touch.
And then you are staring into each other’s eyes, into each other’s souls. Like you’ve always seen each other- like you’ve always known. Kaz plays his cards close to his chest, but you don’t. Nina has teased you for it relentlessly.
When he kisses you, you can’t believe this is happening. It’s perfect. These are things he would only do in dreams. These are things he would only say in dreams. These are…
“This is a dream,” Kaz tells you, or rather, the Kaz of your imagination tells you as he ends the kiss.
“I know” You reply, opening your eyes.
You see Inej hunched over you and taste something disgusting in your mouth.
“We were poisoned. Go to the door- Wylan will give you another antidote.” She says before leaving to go wake up Jesper.
You crawl your way to the door, still feeling the lingering effects of the poison. “Wylan. Antidote?” You croak.
Once you are given the butterfly, you make your way over to Kaz, the only person still under the effects of the poison.
XXXXX
Kaz is confused. He wakes up, back on that mountain of bodies in the river, but his brother is alive.
“Jordie?” He asks, confused.
His brother stares at him, full of rage. Without a word, he begins to drown him. Just when Kaz has almost lost all of his oxygen, his brother pulls him back out from under the water.
“Who are you without your vengeance?” Jordie yells.
“Kaz. Wake up” You say, one gloved hand cupping the side of his face, the other moving his jaw to try to force him to chew. He can’t hear you.
“What is the worth of life if you have no one left to fight for?” Jordie asks, before plunging him under the water again.
“Kaz” You repeat, and he hears you this time. “You’re going to be alright”
You come into focus in a water gaze, the remnants of the poison still giving a dreamlike quality. It takes him a few moments to realize that it’s no longer a hallucination and that both of your hands are on his face. Gloved hands.
You pull your hands away from his face as soon as you see him come out of it.
“Sorry,” You say.
You don’t have to apologize, he thinks.
XXXXX
“Kaz, a word?” You say, wanting to get him alone. You’ve obtained the Neshyenyer and are getting ready to head to East Ravka.
He nods in acknowledgment while the others in the room make no effort to leave.
“Alone.” You add, so the others get the picture.
Everyone exchanges suspicious glances with one another except Kaz, who is only looking at you. Nina winks as she passes you on her way out of the room. You resist the urge to roll your eyes.
You position yourself by the door, a good five feet away from him, in order to respect his boundaries. The boundaries that you’ve consistently had to cross recently to protect him.
“What do you need?” He asks.
“Are you okay?” You ask.
Of course he isn’t, but you want him to admit that. You suspect he’ll respond with something defensive, something clever, something like “Why wouldn’t I be okay?” or “Why does it matter?” or “We have a job to do”. For it to be like the dream.
“Are you?” He responds.
“No. And I’m getting a little tired of pretending I am.” You answer honestly. The difference between you, and all the other crows, and hell, everyone else that you interact with, is that you aren’t emotionally repressed. You don’t hide it under a sense of revenge, don’t mask it with a face of no emotion, and don’t keep your true thoughts and feelings hidden under a veil of humor. He told you it was a weakness, once.
“You’re still wearing the gloves.” He comments.
You glance down at your gloved hands and then back at him. “So I am.”
“You don’t have to do that for me.” You don’t have to do anything for me, He thinks.
“I know.” You say, “I just don’t want to hurt you.”
There is a long silence as you look at each other, not really sure what to say.
“I wanted you to stay,” He states, looking away from you. Almost as if he’s ashamed that he’s allowing himself to be this vulnerable. “When you asked me in the alley… I wanted you to stay.”
You feel your breath catch in your throat at the admission. Maybe the poison-induced hallucination wasn’t too farfetched after all.
“I’ll stay.” You take a step towards him, still unsure of his boundaries. Still unsure how close or far you can get without causing him pain.
“Will you tell me why?” You ask. I can’t help you through something when I don’t know why it causes you pain.
“I don’t know if I can,” It’s the first genuine answer you’ve gotten out of him in a long time.
“When we were poisoned I- you were in my hallucination,” You admit, taking a few more steps closer to him.
“What happened in your hallucination?” He asks. Throughout this, he’s made no effort to move from his seat at the table, but his heartbeat has become steadily faster, stronger.
“I was angry at you- but you seemed to understand why. And you took your gloves off and touched me and- that’s how I knew it wasn’t real.” You reply. “What did you hallucinate?” You add, not wanting him to ruminate on your confession too long.
“My brother was drowning me,” He states.
“I’m sorry,” You say, reflexively.
“He asked me, ‘What is the worth of life if you have no one left to fight for?’ and then I saw you,” You’ve never seen him sheepish before- vulnerability doesn’t exactly suit him.
“Oh,” You breathe. “So what now?”
“We go to East Ravka.”
“Right,” You say, trying not to let the disappointment show in your voice. “Time to save the world. Again.”
“We’re not saving it. We’re just getting paid.” Kaz responds.
You steel yourself, trying not to beat yourself up for thinking you were finally getting somewhere. That this would be anything more than words.
"After. We will discuss us after." He adds, quelling your doubt. "We still have a job to do."
You nod.
"I'm here if you need me." You say, turning to leave.
"I know," Kaz replies.
#kaz brekker x reader#kaz brekker x you#kaz brekker x y/n#kaz brekker x gn!reader#aspiring thanatologist writes#title is pulled from the lyrics of only you lonely you by andrew lloyd webber
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How Are Hands Attractive? (crowleyxreader)
Pronouns-She/Her
Word Count- 1,078
Summary- Reader is a witch and close friends with Aziraphale and works at the bookshop restoring books. Aziraphale asks Y/n for romantic advice for Nina and Maggie which leads to interesting covo about Crowley hands.
The day was stormy there was hardly anybody out on the street because of the terrible thunder and lightning. I was peacefully sipping her cold coffee and restoring an old spellbook that Aziraphale found. The sound of the rain was very soothing and I did not have to worry about Jim short for Gabriel bothering me because Aziraphale told him bookstores are closed on Wednesdays. Aziraphale on the other hand kept interrupting my work so he could get my opinion on most romantic situations for Nina and Maggie.
"Y/n what do you think is the most romantic thing?" Aziraphale asks.
" I don't know. Hmmm maybe leaving me alone so I can finish restoring this book in peace," I respond.
"Seriously, Y/n the book can wait! This matter is of life and death! You are sort of human so you should know more about these things than I." He says looking me very seriously in the eyes.
I sigh and very gently move the book to the side. I take a deep breath " I have personally always found hands very attractive-"
Aziraphale interrupted "How can hands be attractive? They are just helpful tools. Books always say it's the eyes that are the windows to the soul."
"Don't get me wrong eyes are pretty as well but I have always enjoyed hands they help us create they help us hold on to each other. Why did you even ask me anyway if you're just going to think I am wrong. Also, I think we both know I lack any experience or knowledge on romance." I respond annoyed.
Aziraphale smiles at Y/n, "I guess I was just curious." Then his eyes light up like something just clicked in his mind. I think if he was a cartoon a light bulb would have appeared above his head.
"Y/n!" He gasps and I give him an inquisitive look. "You are always staring at Crowley's hands so does that mean!!!"
I quickly crossed my arms across my chest denying the accusation profusely.
Crowley enters the bookshop closing a soaked umbrella, "Who is always staring at my hands."
Y/n's heart nearly pounds out of her chest and she nearly knocks over her coffee.
"Don't tell me you haven't noticed-" I quickly cut Aziraphale off
I come out from behind the desk I was working at and take the umbrella from Crowley, "Don't tell me that you were outside in this weather with an umbrella you could have got struck by lightning."
Crowley lifts his glasses down to look ME in the eyes "Are you serious? A demon struck by lightning would do nothing compared to the heat of Hell."
"How should I know I've never been to Hell," I whine.
Crowley kisses the top of my head and says "And you never will."
Aziraphale smiles a plotting a smile that scares me for what he is planning. He cups his chin with both hands and tilts his head "Crowley what do you find most romantic? Y/n has been telling me what she finds most romantic to help Nina and Maggie. I can see she has quite the type. I think we might even know the guy."
Crowley's face seems to turn sour at Aziraphale probably at the notion of discussing romance so I try to assure him it is unneeded to chime in. "Please ignore him he has been like this all day. He has not let me get a single thing done today."
Instead, he completely ignores me and walks up to Aziraphale, "So what does this man that Y/n fancies have for qualities that make her swoon."
"No, I can't say that would be betraying her trust," Aziraphale puts a hand on his chest and makes a big show of it like he didn't just start this whole mess.
"Come on Angel we are all friends here! Right Y/n? What can you tell the Angel that you can't tell me," he pouts.
"You bring up a great point, Crowley! Y/n can certainly tell you about the man she fancies I don't see a reason she could not! Let me start off I know she loves this man's hands she is always staring at them it is so obvious." Aziraphael smiles brightly and if my glare back could kill he would be dead.
Crowley circles me like prey as if my answer could cure him from hunger. "I've never noticed our little sorceress staring at hands that's very impolite to stare you know."
He calls me a nickname he uses for me frequently as he knows it annoys me. "You know what's impolite to spill others secrets Aziraphale" I glare.
Aziraphale straightens his bowtie, "You never said it was a secret if you had I would not have said a peep. I am very good at secrets you know"
"The thing is I just don't understand why there is anything to hide from your good old pals!" Crowley interrupts. "Unless this guy is someone unworthy of our sorceress's heart. Then in that case Aziraphale would have a duty to tell me."
"Do not be concerned this man I have known longer than anyone. No one could compete with him he is very kind." He quickly assures Crowley.
Crowley started to look like that time when Aziraphale took Gabriel under his protection, "So he is an angel... those are the only beings you have known for the longest. I swear to Hell if it's Gabriel he is not kind Aziraphael you have no idea what he said to me when I was you! I can not believe you let him stay here! He is worse than any demon!"
I quickly put my hand on Crowley's shoulder, "It is not Gabriel I would never do that to you."
Crowley's eyes softened as he looked into your eyes but only for a second before they turned into confusion, "What other angel do you even know on a personal level!"
I saw no choice but to come clean, "It's you! You idiot!"
I took a deep breath to prepare myself for the heartbreak because I am no celestial being who will be around forever. I am just a witch I am really not that different from an ordinary human. But the heartbreak never came instead he held my face and kissed me deeply.
I was stunned speechless and he smirked "So you think my hands are romantic you say."
Bonus-
Aziraphael- Now both of you thank me! I also accept books as thank-yous Y/n has a list of the books of that I am on the hunt for! I also made photocopies of the list so you can carry the list with you at all times as a reminder.
Y/n- Shut up, Angel!
Crowley- Thank you, Angel
#crowley x reader#crowley x y/n#crowley good omens#good omens fic#good omens fanfiction#good omens imagine#good omens drabble#aziraphale x reader#aziraphale imagine#fanfic blog#good omens crowley
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Hello Darling, I was wondering if I could get Kaz thing were him and reader have know each other for ages and like with Jordie and she is the old person Kaz is kinds ok with touching, so one day when a heist goes wrong and Y/N gets hurt and Kaz is like freaking out thinking she's going to die and stuff and its like super fluffy and and like Y/N heals and Kazoo like doesn't leave her side
If you could do this it would be amazing
I’m right here.
Kaz Brekker x Fem!Reader
Hope I did this okay! Thanks for the request 🌸
Notes: This is short and fluffy. I also can’t do good aid or this type of thing so I hope it’s okay!
Warning: Pain to comfort, a little angst, blood, crying in pain, bad writing for sure, spelling mistakes probably.
The group rushed through the door almost breaking it off the hinges. “Get her upstairs.” Kaz shouted as Matthias held you in his arms, Nina by his side focusing on your heartbeat. Inej went to the kitchen where you kept your towels and collected everything.
You blood stained Matthias shirt and your eyes flutter, a groan or a whimper leaving your lips a few times. As soon as they got to the top floor of your home they rushed to the bedroom. “On the bed.” Nina fixed the pillows and the sheets, then patted the mattress. Matthias nodded his head and put you down carefully and tried not to give your extra pain.
Wylan almost sobbed at the sight of your arm falling and going limp. You knew who he was, who was his father and you never shamed him for it. He loved you and cared deeply, you were his best friend. Wylan turned away and into Jesper arms, who took him into his arms quickly. “Is she going to be okay?” He asked and kaz shot him a glare that he couldn’t see.
“Yes, now everyone out except Inej.” Nina’s hand tugged at your bloody shirt and they all went out quickly. Kaz stood still and looked at you, “Kaz, she’ll be fine.” Inej rushed passed passed him with her arms full and went by Nini. “I’m staying.” They didn’t have time to fight with him, but they knew even if they did he would stay.
They had no choice but pull your shirt off and leaving you in the thin layer on your chest. Kaz hated seeing your face curl into pain as they cleaned the wound. “Jordie” he remembered the small boy with a body underneath him, shaking it as he cried for his brother. He got light headed and sat down in the chair. Was he going to lose you too? Shaking his head at the thought because he wouldn’t allow that.
A scream cut him out of his thoughts, you opening your eyes as the needle pressed into your skin. “Stop! Please.” You cried at the pain in your side. Nina apologized as she teared up and Inej looked up at you guilty. “Kaz!” You looked up at him and he felt his entire body move on its own and he was by your side within seconds. “Make it stop!” You cried.
He took your hand in his and gave it a small squeeze, “You can handle it.” He stated and you shook your head. A whimper came out as the needle went back, “Can’t.” He leaned closer and rubbed circles on your hand. “You can, I’m right here.” You looked back at him and the pain became too much for you to handle, along with the blood that you lost, or the shock you felt.
Kaz watched your eyes fell closed and your hand losing its grip. He panicked and looked back at your chest and saw it go up and down. “I’m right here.” He whispered. Kaz held your hand the whole time and stayed by your side, even when it was all done. He refused to leave your side, if something happened while he was away he couldn’t live with himself.
Everyone came and stayed for a while, he was there. When everyone left to sleep he stayed there, Nina and Matthias stayed in the other room. Days passed and he was still in the room by your side. He hated the feelings of lose as if the old friend visited him again to take someone else. You couldn’t leave him, he needed you in his life. The light of his life and the feeling of comfort he so rarely felt was only with you.
Kaz sat in the chair beside your bed and his head leaned on the wall behind him with his eyes closed. You stirred yourself awake and took a moment to remember everything. You look around the familiar room and then down at the pain in your side. A bandage wrapped around your side and only in a bra. “Damn.” You cursed and put your head back.
A small snore caught you by surprise and you looked to the side and saw Kaz asleep. He looked calmer then normal but he still had a snarl on his face, it made you laugh a bit. As much as you could without hurting your side. “Kazzel.” You poked his leg. It took a moment and then shot up and it startled you a bit. He looked panicked and then looked down at you, he looked terrified.
“I’m okay.” You whispered with smiled. Kaz blinked as he saw you up and talking. “Y/n.” He pushed up and moved closer to and leaned down the bed. “Kaz, how long have you been here?” He swallowed. “As long as you have been out, you scared the others.” His hand came up to your cheek and softly moved his fingers on the skin.
“I’m not going that easy.” Smirked up at him. He looked at you and his eyes softened. Leaning himself down he pressed his lips against yours and kissed you softly. He was so afraid he would never get to do that again, or to have you in his arms or seen you smile. You took your hand and put it on his chest to remind him that you were still here.
“Good, because I don’t plan on losing you. You’ll stay with me, even if I have to bring you back to life myself.” He whispered against your lips and put his forehead on yours. And he was true, if he had to drag you out of deaths claws he would do it. He’d fight the saints himself to have you stay with him.
“You’re stuck with me, Kaz Brekker.” You teased and connected your lips with his again.
#kaz brekker#kaz brekker x reader#kaz brekker x y/n#kaz brekker x fem!reader#Jesper fahey#wylan van eck#inej ghana#Nina zenik#matthais helvar#six of crows#six of crows x reader#shadow and bone#shadow and bone x reader#kaz brekker angst#kaz brekker fluff
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https://www.tumblr.com/bitchinbarzal/736733295226896384/do-it-lets-fuck-some-shit-up-cole-anon
At this point she was already pregnant (baby Luca) but she didn't know it
Mama Hischier was ready to raise this baby alone and in secret, i need drama
😮💨 oh bestie the angst. I know this doesn’t really fit with the original storyline but I’m going to make it because it’s too good.
Nico was in Switzerland for the summer with Naomi. You were supposed to fly Iris over half way through the off season before joining your girlfriends on a beach vacation in Greece then coming home to jersey.
However, plans change. You were sick, so severely sick.
You’d ended up calling Nico three weeks into the off season
“I need you to come back to jersey and get iris”
“What?! She’s not supposed to be here for another-“
“Nico, I can’t get into this with you can you do it or not? I can’t bring her there anymore”
You had it out on the phone, him accusing you of being difficult assuming it had something to do with Naomi being there or what he’d told you before he left.
It wasn’t, there was someone else you were too focused on.
Luckily, Timo’s girlfriend had shows in California so they were still in the states and they’d agreed to come to jersey after the shows were finished to get Iris and take her back to Switzerland with them.
You thought it best to let her go to her dads before it got bad.
Iris however was constantly watching you throw up, scared something was wrong. She was so worried.
You knew you were pregnant. Mom's intuition. And you were terrified.
You were scared, the fear from before was coming back up. Everything you’d been through four years ago was sitting at the forefront of your mind.
You were pregnant with Nico’s baby and he was trying to have a baby with someone else.
You hadn’t told him, after your conversations about him and Naomi you decided very selfishly, you’d do this alone.
In Switzerland, Iris was lapping up the love from her auntie, uncle, oma and opa.
All of them had watched her over the week and how Naomi interacted with her.
About a week into her trip, Iris was in bed ready to sleep when her grandma headed up to say goodnight. She stopped when she heard the little girl speak
“Is daddy coming to read to me?”
“No, your dad is busy. He doesn’t want to see you” Naomi snapped and his mom frowned listening to her tone “and Iris, I know your mommy sent you here to ruin our summer but please sweetheart just leave me and your daddy alone this week ok? You’re really bothering us”
She could hear the quiver in Iris’ voice “but mommy’s si-“
“I don’t care. she’s a pain in my side and so are yo-“
“Enough!” Iris scrambled out of bed to her grandma’s arms while Naomi tried to stumble out an excuse for what she’d clearly said.
“I think it’s best you leave Naomi, you’re not welcome in our house any longer”
They made off downstairs, Iris sniffling and Naomi yelling behind them about how they couldn’t kick her out, this wasn’t fair.
“Woah, what’s happening?” Nina asked, stopping the conversations she was having with her brothers and dad in the living room to focus solely on her distraught little niece.
Nico’s mom stared at him in a way she hadn’t since he was a child
“I want her out of our house, now”
He nodded, up out of his seat and straight towards Iris who shifted her head so she wasn’t looking at her father. Nico’s heart broke, he had no idea what was going on.
He left the house with Naomi and didn’t arrive back for almost two hours, by this time Iris was fast asleep in her uncles lap.
When he did come in the family were all waiting for him just as he’d left. He didn’t care about them, or what they had to say. He cared about Iris.
He approached her sleeping form and crouched down infront of her, kissing her cheek before lifting her up into his arms and taking her up to his bed.
He held her all night, still fully dressed in his clothes he’d worn all day. He just had to hold his girl.
When the morning came and Iris woke up she had to gather her surroundings before she saw Nico and cuddled into him some more
“Morning princess”
“Hi daddy”
He sucked in a breath before saying “You want to talk?”
Iris contemplated it for a minute before she said
“Are you and mommy fighting because mommy’s sick? Is that why Naomi doesn’t like mommy?”
Nico frowned “Mommy’s sick?”
Iris nodded "We went to the doctors home and she was crying" now Nico is internally panicking, a million thoughts running through his mind of what could be wrong with you.
"But the doctor lady gave mommy a present to take home and she was smiling after”
“What did she get?” He asks and Iris jumps out of bed, leaving the room momentarily before coming back in holding something.
He takes it from her hand and he is instantly relieved, it's just her sonogram. It takes him a moment before he quirks his head. That's not Iris. He knows her picture, it's in his stall, he sees it everyday.
Then he sees the name and date at the top.
You were pregnant.
Nico has a wave of emotions fall over him for a moment, anger, jealousy, hurt before he turns to Iris
“Mommy’s gonna be okay, ‘ris I promise”
She hums, still stuck into his side before she says
“Daddy?”
“Yeah squish?”
“I wanna go home to mommy”
“Yeah, me too”
So they travelled back to Jersey that night, the two of them needing your comfort.
You were in the middle of watching a movie when they came through the door, startling you
“Mama I’m home!” Iris shouted, jumping up onto the couch and into your arms
“Hi babygirl, what on earth are you guys doing back here?”you were looking at Nico to answer that.
He sat down next to you, pulling the blanket you had over him too then put down the sonogram on the coffee table infront of you both.
The smile on your face dropped and you looked at him, panicked.
“I hope it’s a boy” is all he says before grabbing your hand and squeezing it.
He knew. He knew it was his baby.
You squeezed his hand back “Not the baby mom you’d hoped for-“
“Hey” he grumbled “You’re the best mom and if I get the choice you’ll be the only mom to all of my kids”
“Neeks…”
“We’ll talk when she’s in bed ok?”
You nod, letting it go for now while watching Iris cuddle into your side to watch the movie and Nico’s hand spreads out across your belly.
He had everything he ever wanted under that roof
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In this post, I took a look at the beginning of the Final Fifteen and how Aziraphale's walk back to the bookshop is not the look of an excited or happy angel... instead, it looks like he's upset and desperately making a plan. Whelp, it's time for the next step of the heartbreak that is the Final Fifteen... Aziraphale's dance.
The first thing that happens when Aziraphale enters the bookshop is Nina and Maggie head out from their chat with Crowley. We follow them out, and the camera leaves them and joins the Metatron as he approaches Muriel on the patio reading a book. He checks in on her, and then straightens up, turning around. This gives him the perfect vantage point to stare straight into the bookshop window right at where our angel and demon are talking.
As you can see in the gif above, Aziraphale can see him from where he's standing. Before he even looks at Crowley, he sees the Metatron through the window.
Crowely starts his confession. He doesn't get very far... but really, he doesn't need to. These are two beings who know each other so well they can tell by tone of voice how the other is feeling. And Aziraphale knows just from the tone what Crowley is trying to say. There's a reason that it's taken them 6000 years to say how they feel... it's dangerous. It was never an unnecessary fear on their part, it was a very real and very present danger. And now, Crowley is about to say all the things that Aziraphale wants to hear, and the danger IS STARING AT THEM THROUGH THE WINDOW.
He hasn't even really looked at Crowley yet... heard the tone that Crowley was using, and looking out the window... Yep! Metatron, right there. Note his hands. Up and down. I didn't watch all of Extraordinary Attorney Woo for nothing! Those are "woah woah" hands. Like, stop talking, stop talking, STOP TALKING.
When he finally does look at Crowley, that's not a happy face. Not the face of someone that's finally hearing the confession they've been longing for for millennia. Michael Sheen has given Aziraphale the most endearing heart eyes throughout season 2...
But no heart eyes here? If everything went great with the Metatron and Aziraphale is completely on board with returning to Heaven with Crowley by his side, why in the world would he interrupt this moment? Letting Crowley profess his love would only strengthen Aziraphale's push to stay together. It is "Incredibly good news" after all. No, things did NOT go well with the Metatron, and they are in trouble. And so, Aziraphale is starting to panic. Crowley isn't paying attention to the "shush" hands, or his repeated looks out the window, so the only thing left is to interrupt. Aziraphale's bumbling rush to cut Crowley off feels a lot like "I can't let you continue so you don't incriminate yourself."
SO!! Azi jumps in with his version of his conversation with the Metatron. The "Good News" - "I... (mouth working furiously without sound)... the Metatron..." I don't think it's 'normal Aziraphale stutter' in the moment between those two words. There are plenty of times when Azi gets a little tongue tied when he's too excited (either due to lying OR trying to impress Crowley). But usually when he does that, he looks up and to the left. Instead, this time he makes eye contact with Crowley and does not look away. If you look closely, I'm nearly certain that he mouths the words "We Need Help."
What convinces me of this even more is that Crowley begins to watch him very intently. He's frustrated... certainly! But he doesn't fall into their normal banter. No quips, no growling at being cut off, no gentle arguing. He can absolutely tell from Aziraphale's tone that this is his "Something's Wrong Voice" and instantly listens.
Then the full dance begins. Aziraphale does begin his normal stutter with the wandering hands... he's trying to not say the wrong thing here and make their situation worse while still being convincing that he's going along with what the Metatron wanted.
Crowley tries to play along... until the offer to become an angel again comes up. I don't think that Aziraphale knows just how painful that concept is for Crowley. And with good reason, because I highly doubt that Crowley has been honest with him about it. Aziraphale loves Crowley for ALL that he is, but since he doesn't know how hurtful this will be, he just blunders right into the offer.
Crowley is so hurt? (Offended? Enraged?) by the concept of becoming an angel again, that he can't keep up the dance they've been putting on for the Metatron. In fact, he immediately fires off "And you told him just where he could stick it then." It's not actually a question for Aziraphale... He knows they're being listened to. He's directly telling the Metatron where he can stick it. "We're better than that" = "We're better than YOU (Metatron)"
And we watch the smile fall from Aziraphale's face. IMO, there is no question that Aziraphale suffers from CPTSD. People (and people shaped beings) with CPTSD can have a very hard time when there is a sudden, unexpected emotional response to something they've done or said. He thought they were on the same page, and suddenly Crowley isn't playing along, and he's angry. Furious. And Aziraphale falls back on old habits as he tries to regain his footing... thus, the unfortunate comment of "You're the bad guys." It's a terrible thing to say. And I'm not trying to excuse Azi for saying it... but it was a trauma response to an unexpected situation.
"Tell me you said no!"
"If I'm in charge, I can make a difference."
The dance is over... these lines are not for the Metatron's benefit, or anyone else's. This is real. Crowley wants Aziraphale to say no to the Metatron, regardless of the situation. Aziraphale thinks he can only thwart the Metatron/ protect Crowley and the world by going to Heaven.
Ouch my heart! Onward to Crowley's confession (and possibly a post about the prologue to this heartache and the conversation between Azi and Metatrash)
#good omens#ineffable husbands#aziraphale#crowley#good omens meta#the final fifteen#the metatron is listening#poor crowley just can't play along any more#aziraphale loves crowley and will do anything to keep him safe
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The ineffables fell in love, and God & Satan decided to make a bet on true love.
DO NOT ASK NEIL ABOUT FAN THEORY
Okay so, this is kind of a crack theory. But if this blog is for anything, it's for divulging my crack theories, and not feeling bad about it. My other blog is where I act like a properly sane person.
I have had a lot of nebulous thoughts that led to this theory but there was one bit of dialogue that tied it all together for me, that we will discuss at the very end. I'm going to start by laying out each of my *Clues* for you below, and we'll tie all my threads together by the end. Shall we begin?
Sanctuary Lights
Read this great post by @noneorother ! here c:
Aziraphale & Crowley's Angelic Playlist
Not Aziraphale and Crowley's Earthly Playlist, no no no, their Angelic Playlist.
These songs definitely tell a story. They are full of heartbreak, and longing, misunderstanding and disagreement, all while flowing with an undertow of deep love. And don't even get me started on The Book of Love. I have loved that song for so long and when I saw that was one of Neil's 3 picks for this playlist I did tear up a bit.
These songs no doubt illustrate the final 15 minutes. Aziraphale wants to leave, he needs to go to heaven to fix things, to protect humanity, and Crowley is hurt, he wants Aziraphale to run away with him. But, could they also mirror something else? Could they mirror Crowley and Aziraphale's disagreement before the Great War and the Fall? I mean it is their Angelic playlist afterall. It could have very easily been their any-other-adjective playlist.
In the Before the beginning scene we are shown, Angel!Crowley wants to stand up for the universe, and protect his creations, and Aziraphale wants to put his head down and hide. Angel!Crowley tried to do what he thought was right, and it resulted in a boiling pool of sulphur. He doesn't think Aziraphale can succeed at what he has already failed to do. This time, Aziraphale is the one who wants to stand up to Heaven and protect creation and humanity, and Crowley knows what that looks like, so he just wants to run and keep Aziraphale safe.
Maybe that's why the final fifteen hurts so much, even if they might not remember it well, because maybe they've been through this before, before the beginning.
Magic shop Ventriloquist Dummies
Read a great post by @noneorother here! c:
"Enough to Make you Believe in True Love?"
This dialogue is what set off the chain reaction that led to my ultimately writing this post. Don't remember this quote? It's easy to miss and seemingly unimportant. Just after Gabriel recovers his memories and Shax accuses Beelzebub of being a traitor we get this:
Beelzebub: "I didn't collaborate with Heaven, anymore than Gabriel collaborated with Hell. I just found something that mattered more to me than choosing sides"
Maggie: "That's really sweet"
Nina: "Enough to make you believe in true love?"
Maggie and Nina who are still in the bookshop and watching these events unfold have been silent, but finally share these two lines. And I finally noticed, it's kind of a weird thing for Nina to say to Maggie, no? Why wouldn't Maggie believe in true love? Why does Nina think Maggie wouldn't believe in true love? We've seen Maggie pining over Nina and saying she's in love with her earlier in the season so why might a romantic who's never even talked to the woman she claims to be in love with not believe in true love, and why might her and Nina have discussed that before?
Is this little aside a conversation really being had by Nina and Maggie?
The Job Bet
That's why he's perfect for the bet! This is the final piece to my puzzle before I wrap up my ramblings and try to coherently tell you how they fit together. God and Satan make a bet, to see if Job is really truly righteous, and loves God, even if She takes away everything she's given him. They aren't above making bets about their creations, and taking everything away from them, testing them to destruction.
Conclusion
Let me weave you a web... The Starmaker, and Aziraphale meet in what we see is the first scene of season two. Maybe in the time before the fall they become close, and fall in love. Angels shouldn't have free will so that shouldn't be possible right? God and Lucifer!Satan? (maybe?) take notice and talk about it, maybe how they did with Job? Maybe they disagree about true love. Maybe God insists that in the ineffable plan, Crowley and Aziraphale will always end up together no matter what. Satan disagrees, they can be driven apart. They make a deal, a bet. The fall is inevitable, its ineffable, so they ensure Crowley and Aziraphale end up on either side of the factions, God lets Satan destroy everything they have, and then they'll see...
Fast forward to The Great War, the Starmaker doesn't really want to rebel like the other angels but gets swept up on their side of things, on the losing side, maybe with a bit of divine or demonic intervention. All he ever did was ask questions! He and Aziraphale are separated. Later, the Serpent of Eden slithers up next to the Angel of the Eastern Gate and strikes up a conversation. They don't remember each other, maybe a vague impression of familiarity, but the demon can't help but be drawn to the angel.
God and Satan we now know must chat about the goings on of Earth, making bets about Job and all that. That's at least my possible explanation for why Nina and Maggie have those weird lines during the Ineffable Bureaucracy reveal. Maybe God and Satan popped in to check on their bet and see what was happening with their stupid free wheeling creations?
Despite everything Aziraphale and Crowley are still together after all this time, and they do love each other. But they can always continue to be tested, even to destruction, or so they may believe.
Hey look, I'm not saying any of this is at all accurate but it was fun to come up with hehe.
#good omens#good omens meta#good omens 2#crowley x aziraphale#good omens theories#crowley#michael sheen#aziraphale#david tennant#good omens clues#good omens theory#good omens clue#good omens crack theory#you dont have to take this seriously#like at all i wont be disappointed#but it was fun to write
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