#I love it so fucking much one of these days ill replay it and you will have intense infodumps along with black and white lol
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Kid Icarus has entered my brain again for the 100th time and of course my Black and White brainrot continues so I need to say
Pit and N would be friends like, Pit see’s N as kinda a really mellowed out Palutena, and N see’s Pit as extremely similar to Hilbert so they both connect decently quickly. Not to mention both would have similar abandonment issues and both are very autistic coded. I think N would infodump random Pokemon facts to Pit and he would listen intensely
This is also kinda inspired by me and my friend playing Minecraft where they had a Pit skin and I had an N one, so they can both go a little insane in the forest dealing with the creepers lol
#kid icarus#kid icarus pit#kid icarus uprising#natural harmonia gropius#n harmonia#pokemon black and white#minecraft#listen they both are my kins so they legally need to interact#they would just have a very strong vibe despite their personalities being so different#like they are different but have similarities#they both eat bark off of a tree#also i need to say KIU is my favorite game ever made#I love it so fucking much one of these days ill replay it and you will have intense infodumps along with black and white lol
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Cameras Pt. 2
~Leon Kennedy x fem! Reader~
Word count combined for both parts one and two: 8277
PART ONE
Content warnings: smut, sexual content, breaking n entering, stalker leon, obsessed leon, dirty talk, degradation, praise, grinding, slapping, spitting, choking, hair pulling, biting, aggressive sex, very brief mention of wanting to slice reader open and climb inside her, lots of begging, blowjob, throat fucking, taking pictures during sex, fingering, p in v sex, creampie
!!!!!!MINORS DNI! GHOSTKENNEDY IS STRICTLY 18+!!!!!!
The water for your shower had been running for a few minutes now, but as you sat on the toilet seat, your mind was elsewhere. Jumbled thoughts and random flashbacks to the past 2 days were consuming you. You’d been home for two hours now and had yet to do anything at all besides think and think. But you had to shower and probably eat something eventually so you opened your phone and connected to your Bluetooth speaker, allowing your brain to get lost in the music. Maybe music could chase the thoughts away, maybe you could have a few minutes of peace.
You stepped underneath the hot water and let out a deep sigh. You let the water wash over your body and focus on the lyrics of the song blaring through the speaker. Slowly washing your body as you swayed to the music. You found yourself mumbling along to the lyrics of the song as you ran shampoo through your hair. All that mattered right now was the music and washing yourself. You’d never taken such a serene fucking shower, but things had gotten weird since what you’d discovered about Leon.
Leon. So much for sweet inner peace. You weren’t any closer to knowing what you were going to do about him. How could you even show your face around the office knowing he’s there? You can’t manage to force yourself to forget about him and trust me when I say you’ve tried. You’ve desperately tried to push the fresh memories to the back of your mind. As time goes on, perhaps you could forget about what happened; or at the very least the memories could become hazy and your brain wouldn’t be plagued with replays of Leon and his cock. How do you forget a cock like that? Now you’re thinking about his cock again. You’re supposed to not be thinking about his cock. Stop thinking about his cock!
You finished washing yourself off and stepped out of the shower, wrapping yourself up snugly in a towel. You wiped the fog off the mirror and stared into your reflection. Why was this happening to you of all people? Maybe it wasn’t you specifically after all. It could just be a thing for Leon. He picks someone to obsess over until he’s bored and then moves onto the next fixation. He definitely knew what he was doing with the obsessive stalker shit. He could eventually move on and then you could move on as well. Now that you know about him, he could lose interest in you.
God, you really hoped that wasn’t the case. You hope that isn’t the case? Why the fuck would you hope that’s not the case? This isn’t healthy at all. You hate the way the whole situation is making you feel. Well, hate is a very strong word and Leon doesn’t deserve to be associated with such a word. Uncomfortable? Nerve racking? Uneasy, tense, disturbed? You couldn’t think of a word to describe it. Exhilarating? Intoxicating? Maybe you loved it. Maybe a part of you hated it and the other part, a much bigger part, absolutely loved it in every way. Nobody or anything had ever been so devoted to you. Infatuated with you.
You’re one mentally ill human being. You shook the thoughts from your head as you made your way out of the bathroom. Dinner and some good sleep should help clear your mind. Your thoughts could be factory reset by the morning and you’ll be able to go about your day as if everything is normal. Welcome to the state of Denial, you’ve officially entered. Enjoy your stay with us and please come again. You’re losing your mind, you’ve gone mad.
Upon entering your living room, you came to an abrupt halt. Your heart felt like it almost fell out of your ass and your muscles all tensed up as if preparing for impact. “What the fuck?” you yelled out, “What are you, the fucking cat whisperer?” The man on your couch just chuckled, not even looking up from the book in his hands. One of your cats was cuddled up against his leg and your other cat was on the back of the couch cuddled into his opposing shoulder. “What are you doing here? Is that my book?” you asked Leon.
He shut the book and laid it down on the other cushion on the couch. He looked up at you and replied, “You should really read the next chapter, things are really starting to heat up.” He talked so casually, as if nothing was out of the ordinary. All you could do was stand in place staring at him, eyebrows furrowed together. You didn’t know what to say, what to do, what to make of this situation. “How was your shower?”
You cocked an eyebrow, “Good. What are you doing here?”
“We have things to discuss,” he motioned for you to come closer to him, but you refused to move. “Come. Here,” he demanded and you shook your head at him.
“You couldn’t knock?”
“Why would I knock when you know I can just come in? Sounds like a waste of time to me.”
“Because you don’t live here! You could be a nice guy and respect boundaries, although it’s obvious you aren’t very good at that,” you shot him a dirty look and all he did was laugh. Comes into your place unannounced, scares the shit out of you, and he has the audacity to laugh at you. You two stared right at each other. An unspoken staring contest taking place between the two of you. You broke eye contact and sighed, slowly making your way over to sit next to him on the couch.
Leon had other plans, quickly darting his arms out to intercept you. He easily maneuvered you to straddle his thighs, causing you to let out an embarrassing shriek.
“Leon, what the fuck? I’m basically naked! Let me go,” you exclaimed and tried to pull away from him, but he just held onto you tighter. He wrapped his hands around your back and pulled you even closer to him.
“Oh wow, I thought you were fully dressed under your towel. My mistake,” he smirked as you gave him the deadliest stare you could muster with flushed cheeks. “Have you gone all shy on me? But you displayed everything so nicely for me in those photos,” which caused you to avert your eyes away from him, staring at the cushion underneath you.
He grabbed your chin and brought your face back up to his and you couldn’t help but finally take in his appearance. He was wearing a button up shirt with the top few buttons undone, exposing the light hair on his chest. The sleeves were pushed up above his elbows, extenuating his huge biceps. He could wrap that bicep around your throat, slowly drain the life from you and you’d die a happy little content slut.
You brought your eyes back up to meet his, but his eyes were wandering elsewhere. His eyes looked across your exposed collarbones, down your arms, exploring the valley of your exposed thighs on either side of him. His eyes devoured you in a way that sent chills down your spine.
He finally met your gaze and you didn’t give yourself time to think before your right hand was raising up to his cheek, gently rubbing it. “You’re a fucking creep,” you said, your eyes never leaving his. Both your hands tangled up into his dirty blond hair as you continued, “What kind of a person breaks into someone’s house and jerks off with their panties? You’re a freak of nature. They should study people like you. What’s wrong with you?” He ground his hips up into you and you could feel his hard cock rubbing against you.
You pulled his hair as he brought his mouth to your ear, nibbling gently on the lobe. You had to fight back the moan that threatened to spill past your lips. He brought his mouth right up against your ear and spoke, “What kind of slut gets turned on by such behavior, huh?” You slowly start grinding yourself against his jeans, your exposed cunt making contact with his covered cock. You pulled your hands away from him, causing him to pull his mouth away from your ear and lean back so he could look at you.
You don’t know what came over you, but you pulled your dominant hand and slapped him as hard as you could across his face. “Anyone turned on by what you do is fucking deluded,” you told him as his hands pushed your towel up past your hips. His hands gripped so tightly into your hips you knew there’d be marks. You felt like your pelvis might snap in half between the pressure of his hands, but fuck did it make you so uncontrollably wet.
“What was I supposed to do? The second I laid my eyes on you I couldn’t think of anything fucking else. I was jerking my cock what seemed like every hour for weeks after meeting you. I tried to stay away, but I couldn’t take it anymore. I wanted to slice you open, climb inside your body, and fucking live there. But I obviously can’t do that, so I climbed inside your house, surrounding myself with your things, learned everything there was to know about you, so at the very fucking least I could be inside your mind,” he said as you two grinded into each other like your lives depending on it.
He continued, “I watched you install your stupid cameras and do you think I gave a shit? I put on a show for you so that I could overtake your fucking mind like you did mine. I’ve been watching you for so long, I knew you were a depraved, needy whore. I knew if I showed you the truth it’d make your little pussy wet. You were made for me, fuck, just look at you.” He grabbed the back of your hair and yanked your head back. You couldn't contain it anymore, his words working you up more than you could stand.
Whimpers, gasps, pants, moans, sounds you’d never made before in your life were falling from your lips as you continued getting that sweet friction against your weeping cunt. His hand left your hair and pulled your towel completely off, baring you completely before him. He took one of nipples into his mouth and sucked intensely, like he was a dying man and the only thing keeping him alive was his mouth on your body.
As he sucked on your breast, his eyes rose and stared back into yours. This sudden urge came over you and you let saliva pool in your mouth before spitting it out on his cheek. He stopped the assault on your breast and looked at you with a shocked expression on his face, trying to comprehend what you had just done to him. “You disgust me,” you said before he quickly wrapped his hand around your throat, completely cutting off your air.
Your hand quickly shot up and gripped onto his. You weren’t trying to pull his hand away, oh no, you held his grip tighter. Your reflexes were kicking in, your mouth fell open as your lungs tried to suck in any air they could. Your eyes were rolling into the back of your head, but that didn’t stop you from feeling Leon spit right into your open mouth.
“Fucking look at you taking whatever I’ll give you. You’re a filthy whore and you can’t even help it. You sit here and call me all sorts of names because you love my obsession with you,” he spoke as your face felt on fire and numb at the same time. He let go of your throat and you began to greedily suck in the air you’d been deprived of.
Grabbing you by the shoulders, he pushed you onto the floor on your knees as he stood before you, undoing his belt and jeans letting them fall down until he was just in his boxers before you. Your vision cleared as you looked directly at his hard dick through his briefs. You could see the growing wet spot on them from his precum as he brought his hand to his bulge and started rubbing himself through his underwear.
You looked up with pleading eyes, hoping he’d understand what you so badly wanted to give him, but understanding is not what you got.
“What is it, baby? Is there something you want? We have to ask for things when we want them, that’s a concept you’re familiar with right? Or are you just a stupid slut who expects me to give her whatever she wants without having to work for it, hmm?” he said, the pace in which he was rubbing himself picking up. You whined, maybe he would give in and just let you take him without having to speak the words out loud. He just stared at you, waiting.
You cleared your throat and forced out the words, “Please, can I please suck your cock? I need to taste you so bad, please. Please sir, please fuck my mouth like you deserve to.” Once the words came out you couldn’t stop them. You needed him so badly, all you could do was helplessly beg. “I’ll be so good, I’ll do whatever you want from me, just please let me take your cock. Let me show you I can be good. Let me show you how well my throat can take it,” you continued begging and almost started drooling as he slowly pulled his underwear down, letting them fall to his ankles.
You looked up at him, asking for permission, “May I, sir?” He ran his hand down your scalp, bringing it down to your cheek and massaging it underneath his palm. He suddenly pulled his hand away before a sharp slap met your cheek that had your brain going foggy. The pain spread through your face, causing your jaw to fall open in a groan.
Leon took this opportunity to shove his cock into your mouth, your attention grabbed immediately as your lips wrapped around him. You let out a moan as the taste of his precum flooded your mouth. The pain from the slap mixed with his taste had your eyes rolling back into your head as you sucked him in as hard as you could.
Leon’s head fell back in pleasure as a moan of your name fell from his lips. You pulled his cock deeper into your mouth, hitting the back of your throat to spur him on. Your hand wrapped around the base of his cock, pumping him while you took his cock as deep as it could go in your throat. The sheer size of his member still blew your mind despite seeing it over camera twice. Nothing could compare to him being right in front of your face.
One of his hands tangled in your hair as the other one fiddled with something behind him. “Hey,” he said, grabbing your attention away from the work you were doing on his cock, “You can say no, okay?” You raised an eyebrow questioningly as you didn’t know what he was trying to say. He pulled up your Polaroid camera and it started coming together in your brain. You whimpered realizing he wanted to take pictures of the two of you together.
The idea rushed feverishly through you and straight down to your cunt. You’d never thought of taking pictures in the act. You both knew you’d taken plenty of pictures alone, but the thought of doing this with Leon and having the pictures for both of you to hold onto? You could feel the arousal pooling down your thighs as you nodded your head once to let him know to please continue. He smiled down at you, “Atta girl. Put on a show for me and I’ll make it worth your while, yeah?” The hand still held in your hair pulled tightly, causing you to close your eyes as you kept up your work on his cock.
You lost yourself in pleasing him. Giving him pleasure gave you pleasure as well. The way his cock stretched your mouth around him was heavenly. He was thrusting into your mouth, pushing himself down your throat. Tears were pouring down your face, but you didn’t want him to stop. You loved feeling like this, loved when your mind went foggy as he used you.
“Look at me,” he suddenly demanded. You looked up and your eyes immediately looked into the camera as he snapped a picture of you. “Fuck, such a good girl. So good for me, your mouth is, fuck, fucking perfect,” he whined out. The sound was pure sex, causing you to moan around his dick.
“You want me to fuck you? You wanna take me into your slutty cunt, huh?” he asked you as you pulled your mouth off his cock sucking in a deep breath.
“Please, please. I want you to fuck me so bad. I want you to use my pussy until you cum, sir,” you were once again pleading for him. You couldn’t find shame within you anymore. Your need heavily outweighed your pride. And knowing he liked you like this? You wanted to give yourself over to him whenever he wanted, however he wanted.
He walked around you, pushing you forward so that your chest was laying on the cushions of your couch, knees still on the floor as he spread them wider before him. You looked back at him just in time to see him take a picture of you bent over for him. After the photo was pushed out of the camera, he brought the device closer to your sopping pussy and took a picture of how wet and needy you were for him. He sat the camera down and started kneading both his hands into your ass cheeks.
Leaning forward he kissed your shoulder as one hand slipped down between your thighs and rubbed your clit gently. He ran his fingers up and down your folds before sinking a finger into your wet heat. You couldn’t help but whine at this point. You were so worked up, you could’ve taken his cock immediately, but you were also too worked up to be able to voice this. He slid another finger in as you let out a long, high pitched moan.
“Are you ready for me, baby? I need to feel your pussy around my cock,” Leon asked you as you nodded your head as fast as humanly possible. He chuckled at your neediness before slowly pulling his fingers out of you and bringing them to your lips. “Here, be a good girl and clean this up for me,” he could barely finish his statement before you were sucking his fingers clean of your juices. He let out a deep moan as his other hand pulled back and smacked your ass hard.
He wrapped his hand around his cock and rubbed the tip against your wet hole, causing you to instinctively push yourself back, trying to take his cock. This earned you another smack on your ass. You moaned as you arched your back from the pain. Leon took this opportunity and slammed himself all the way inside of you, which had you unintentionally biting his fingers that were still being held in your mouth. He moaned at the way your teeth dug into his fingers before pulling them out and running his hand down your back.
You turned to look at him, begging, “Please move Leon, I need it so bad. I need you to fuck me, please please please please.” You couldn’t help but move your ass around to get some sort of movement within your pussy. You were so desperate, you couldn’t wait any longer, you needed him to fuck you until you couldn’t remember your own name.
“Shhhhh,” he whispered as he wrapped his hand around your throat, pulling your head back to rest on his peck as your back arched even further for him, “I’ve got you sweet girl.” He finally, finally, started moving and moans were already falling from your lips uncontrollably. “That’s it, you take me so well. Gonna make you feel so good,” Leon praised you. He had completely switched from the degrading way he spoke to you earlier and the praise had you melting beneath his touch. Your walls flutter around his cock in approval.
His pace picked up as he ruthlessly began pounding into you. You were uttering incoherent phrases at him as the pleasure was coursing through every nerve in your body. Leon leaned forward and buried his head in your neck, letting loose the most pornographic moans you’d ever heard. You didn’t know what was giving you more pleasure, the way he was fucking you or the way he sounded.
You pulled your hands from where they were gripping the couch and wrapping them behind you, tangling his hair in your fingers as you pulled his mouth to yours. The kiss was messy and loud, moaning as your tongues clashed together desperately trying to feel every square inch of each other. Leon’s hands released their grip on your thighs and ran them up to your stomach until he reached your breasts, where he rubbed your nipples between his fingers, further driving you crazy.
You felt yourself slowly climbing that mountain, heading towards release, when Leon’s movements suddenly stopped and he pushed your chest back into the couch, pressing you into it with both hands. You were whining and pushing yourself up and down his cock while he held you in place. “That’s it, fuck yourself with my cock. You look so good like this, so fucking needy,” Leon barely formed the words together as he got lost in the sight of you. He rested his hands lazily on his hips, holding himself up as you forcibly fucked back onto his cock.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck, please fuck me. I’m so close I need you to fill me up, please,” you begged, wearing yourself out from your movements, hardly able to catch your breath but unrelenting in your need to cum.
Leon gave into your request, pushing his hands into your back, holding you in place as he ruthlessly fucked into you. He let out a loud moan before speaking, “Fuck, I’m gonna cum. Cum with me sweet girl. I want to feel you cum around my cock.” You couldn’t formulate a response, but after a few more hard, sloppy thrusts you were screaming Leon’s name and all sorts of profanities as you came.
After feeling you squeeze his cock so tightly, Leon was cumming deep inside your pussy. Thrusting into you through his orgasm, pushing his cum further inside of you. Your knees gave out beneath you, but Leon was quick to grab your hips and hold you up. He slowly slid his cock out of you, taking in the view of his cum slowly dripping down your thighs. If it was possible, he would’ve cum again at the sight alone.
He helped you turn over and lay on the floor right beside your couch as he laid down right next to you. You were tightly sandwiched between the couch and coffee table with him, but you didn’t mind. You wanted to be as close to him as possible. You rolled onto your side and threw your leg and arm over him, chin resting on his shoulder. He turned to look at you, catching your lips in a slow, gentle kiss. It was a sharp contrast to how you’d just been moments ago and it would’ve given anyone whiplash, but to you both it made perfect sense.
Leon pulled away and spoke softly, “There’s only one thing I’m not sure of. Why’d you get the cameras?” You let out an airy laugh and were about to speak when you were interrupted by a loud crash in the kitchen, followed by one of your cats zooming through the living room and into your bedroom away from the noise.
“What the fuck was that?” you yelled, whipping your head towards the kitchen. “That’s why I got the damn cameras! Between the cats, and apparently you, I was beginning to believe I was living with a poltergeist.”
Leon laughed before speaking, “Hey, I’m careful. That’s all on them or the poltergeist.”
~masterlist~
#part two#leon kennedy#leon kennedy smut#leon kennedy x reader#leon kennedy x you#leon kennedy x y/n#resident evil#resident evil 2#resident evil 4#resident evil 6#leon s kennedy x reader#leon s kennedy#leon s kennedy smut#smut#leon kennedy imagine#leon kennedy fanfic#leon kennedy fanfiction#resident evil smut#leon smut#ghostkennedy
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How would the Proxies react to fem, proxy reader having feelings for them also? (This can be romantic or smut whatever you are comfortable with)
I love their dynamics ngl
Creepypasta Proxies x Fem!Reader
|reciprocated feelings|
Warnings: violence,mental illness, abuse,slight suggestive themes mentions
I'll start with our favorite asshole Masky,whose ego would be over the roof if you happen to have romantic feelings towards him
It means that all of his bullying, harassing and abusing you kind of turned out to be in his favor after all!
He wouldn't believe they are genuine in the first place,he thinks that they are just feelings of lust,of passing the time in this fucked up place,he wouldn't mind if that would be the case either
Tim noticed how you care about him,from a simple light of his cigar to the way you offered to patch him up after training.The way you surprisingly went with him instead of suggesting Brian to assist him in a mission,all of these made his chest warm
Masky's assaults would mellow down A LOT to observe you more,he isn't dumb either to your advances.
If you're more confident I see the reader and Masky making out in the woods,giving life to fantasies,but even after that your relationship would take time to be "real"
But,if you're shy and prefer to not make the first move,Masky would continue to harass you until the point he will have a nervous breakdown and yell ask you directly
"Do you have the hots for me or something?stop fucking around with my fucking head"
After this he will actually realise how much of a dick he actually has been and the tiniest hope he had for someone like you to actually be interested in a piece of shit like him would make itself known
Masky will have a cold yet extremely rare moment of weakness with you while Tim would fully try to express himself while also trying to not creep you out
The man will start by treating you distant at first,but he will warm up to you! If you're more "submissive" he would definitely call you "his bitch" and would make very clear that you are his possession
Even if you're more "dominant" he will continue to guard you from the other residents,but he will treat you more like his equal instead of a princess he has to protect
Either way you're the fire of his ice-cold heart
Toby is already delusional,but the prolonged eye contact definitely made his nights longer,both to replay the way you looked at him and the "hand training" if you know what I mean
He knows there's something more to the way you walk and talk about your day with him,that's why he's even more anxious than usual,which is very very bad
If you just realised you liked him and warmed up more to him,you will have about a week or so time to confess before he will have a breakdown and be all over you
He knows he's a creep,a weirdo even (Creep by Radiohead would describe how he feels about you) and would pin you in some place while pressing his weight onto you and asking over and over again if you think he's "worth it"
Let's face it.He's a traumatized young adult who faces constant bullying,death and compares himself to the "competition" who are stronger and "more alluring" than him.His insecurity is more than justified
After the breakdown he will need one or two days to process his thoughts,he definitely needs some reassuraning from you,even if it's small like a side smile or a wink
He's scared of creeping you out and losing you,that's why he would try to be better.After all,he got the woman everybody craves,so this mindset would give him a littttleee confidence
"Lmao,fuck you Masky" eyes everytime both of you walk suspiciously close to each other.Don't get me wrong,you're not a prize but you're definitely worth bragging over with
Toby is also a hypersexual,so except a lot of begging and pretty moans and pleases to do something to him or to let him do things to you
He's a puppy after you,a very loyal and docile one~
We also have the perfect pervert,Hoodie,who much like his friend,doesn't believe your feelings at first to be genuine
He definitely knows you're onto him,that's why he comes to you first as a fuck buddy
If you accept he would except you to be "lovey dovey" with him only when you need something from him,so he finds strange that you continue to be warm even without any sexual needs
If you turn off his offer he would actually find it amusing that you fell over him from all deranged people
There are no mind games anymore for a while, he would simply return your over friendly gestures and slowly make your way deeper into his heart with some deep questions,to make sure you actually can love him
Brian knows you're capable of love,after all you're the most human of them all,but he doubts you want to see what is layered past him
For the first fucking time he becomes soft and is actually afraid of losing this connection,that's why he approaches you with a "fuck it we ball" mentality and asks you one night
"Do you want to love me?" he uses the L word after Toby.It's up to you how you respond,but he is set on making you accept who he is and to continue on letting you love him
As always,he will continue on staying by your side,even more so than he actually did before.
#creepypasta x reader#creepypasta headcanons#creepypasta#headcanons#y/n#tim wright#tim wright x reader#brian thomas#brian thomas x reader#brian x reader#masky x reader#hoodie x reader#ticci toby#ticci toby x reader#toby x reader#creepypasta toby x reader#toby headcanons#masky headcanons#hoodie haeadcanons#marble hornets x reader#marble hornets#creepypasta masky x reader#creepypasta hoodie x reader#creepypasta toby headcanons#creepypasta masky headcanons#creepypasta hoodie headcanons
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omg I'm the anon who requested the jamie x reader neighbours fic and boy you delivered! fucking love it! can't wait for part 2
This is so lovely anon, I'm so glad you liked it!!! For you, I will deliver a part two with the caveat that I'm so sorry I got carried away and now it will be in three parts (sorry again), but the last part will be the finale!!! Anyway I present to you:
Too Good to Be True (part two)
read part one here
warnings: allusions to abuse, mention of anxiety/panic attack, daddy issues, two hopeless idiots flirting, a bit of angst at the end but worth it (sorry again)
A/N: I have nothing to add except this gif is not mine and has turned me feral
It’s been several days since you left your phone number and you are nervous.
You don’t get why you care so much.
It’s just Jamie, your annoying neighbour. Your annoying, but also extremely handsome neighbour. Your annoying, handsome neighbour who massaged your feet, and your legs, and almost your thighs and god you couldn’t think straight. You’d been able to get nothing done as you had spent the last few days just constantly replaying that evening in your head. And to make things worse, it turns out Annoying Handsome Jamie was in fact a very famous Premier League footballer. Who has also been caught having sex on TV. (Yes, you had binged the entirety of his Lust Conquers All series since that night, but that was neither her nor there.)
After almost a week you had given up. The exhibition was just under two weeks away and you hadn’t seen him in the garden or outside the house at all. He had probably come to the conclusion that you were both too weird and too normal for him and the only conclusion was move on with your life and forget his stupid sexy face ever existed, when you got a text.
u free tonight
Jxoxo
Of course, you wanted to play it cool. After all, you had spent the entirety of the week waiting for this message.
29 minutes and 59 seconds later.
I might be.
The phone immediately pings.
do u not know??
xoxo
Depends, what are you thinking?
thought u wanted a model
Xoxo
Of course, he was thinking about the painting. As you also definitely were. You were a professional artist. Almost.
What time?
ill come after the match
You spend your evening preparing and also perhaps figuring out an outfit that says 'casual bohemian artist that definitely doesn't care' while redoing your makeup twice. However, as the hours stretch on and on and on you are at the point of giving up and going to bed, when the doorbell finally rings.
You race down, before waiting a minute, quickly checking yourself in the mirror and pulling out your phone to pretend you had already been looking at something when you open the door.
But before you can pull the casual act, he walks right past you.
“Hello to you too, Jamie.”
He strides into your living room where the canvas is set up and immediately starts taking his clothes off.
“Woah, what do you think you’re doing there?”
“Er, I thought you were painting nudes?”
“Er no-” At this point his shirt has already come off and he’s starting to unbutton his trousers. Of course he is very toned, with tanned arms and neck where his football shirt has been. You feel the breath knocked out of your body, glimpsing the very top of his boxers as you struggle for words.. He looks at you confused. Eventually you stutter an answer. "K-Keep the trousers on, okay?”
“What should I do then?”
“What do you mean?”
“How do I pose, like?” You shrug.
“However you want to, Jamie.”
“I dunno what I want.” You sigh.
“You just need to stand there and look pretty.”
“Well I do that all the time, so.”
“Great. So just…keep doing that.”
Jamie smiles to himself.
“What is it?”
“So you do think I’m pretty?” He smirks at you. You fold your arms.
“What are you, a sixteen year old girl Jamie?” You start sketching. “Besides, you know what you look like.” You go back to drawing in silence. You swear you see his cheeks dust pink for a second before he ouffs his chest back out and smiles.
“Aren’t you going to ask if I think you’re pretty?”
You freeze.
“No, because if you haven’t noticed, I’m not sixteen. I am an adult woman and I don’t need random men for unsolicited affirmation, no matter how pretty they are.”
Jamie opens his mouth, before closing it again. Maybe that was a bit harsh, but what else could you say? Tell me how pretty you think I am Jamie. Or better yet, show me. I’m dying to know. You could practically feel the feminism leaving your body.
You dismiss these thoughts and get back to sketching. You can see Jamie is looking down and acting fidgety, swinging his arms.
“Oh, for Christ’s sake.” You walk over and plant your arms on his shoulders. He is surprisingly warm and firm to the touch, and you try not to blush. “Is it okay if I move you?”
He nods, surprisingly quiet. You turn him ever so slightly, before gently pushing him down onto your stool. As you move one of his (very muscly) arms, you swear you feel a slight tremor. Was he shaking? You step a little closer, a hand on his back.
“We don’t have to do this if you don’t want to, Jamie.”
His face hardens.
“But I said I will, so I will.”
“But you don’t have to. Only do this if you want to.” You smile at him, and his face softens again.
“I do want to, trust me. It’s just been a long day.”
“Okay, but if you need to stop or take a break, just say the word.”
You step back to your canvas. You try to focus solely on the drawing, but every time he looks at you, you find your whole body heating up. Despite this, you steal glances anyway. He stares at you constantly, in a way that makes you feel stupid and giggly. Observing all the soft and hard lines of his body, you eventually start to notice small scars all over his body until you reach his hands. You don’t know why it took you so long to notice, but his knuckles are slightly bruised.
“Jamie?”
“Yeah?”
“Tell me about your day.”
“Why? It was dead boring.”
“I don’t know. I find it helps me find the right mood.” You prepare your brushes. “You know, it tells me what colours to use.”
“Oh. I mean, nothing much happened.” He looks down at his feet. “I got up, went to play football, came here.”
“But why did you text me? Why today?”
“I dunno.” You sit in silence for a moment, as you mix the colours. “I mean, my dad came to the match.”
“Right.”
“Pulled his usual shit.”
“Usual shit?”
“Just being a complete dickhead.” You start painting.
“In what way?”
“Saying stuff.”
“What kind of stuff?”
“Just the usual stuff.”
“You keep saying “usual” Jamie. I don’t think whatever he said is usual for most people.”
“What about your dad? He said that thing about you being a teacher right? Because you couldn’t paint or summat?” You put your brush down.
“Yeah he did say that. He says a lot of shit, none of which I would consider usual. Or at least it shouldn’t be.” You step off your chair and towards Jamie, reaching gently for his hand. “We don’t just have to take this shit, you know.”
“I don’t fucking take it!” He pulls away. You flinch back. He looks alarmed as he realises. “I should go.” He starts to walk out.
“Jamie, I didn’t mean to upset you -” You walk after him as he paces towards the door. He halts at the entrance.
“I’m not upset, I just - I came here because I didn’t want to think about my dad. When I’m with you, I never think about him. Or anything else, really.” He pauses. “I’m sorry.” Before you can reply, he runs off.
The next few days pass by. You send a few texts to Jamie, but no reply. The exhibition is only a couple of days away now, so you try to keep yourself busy. But his words won’t stop swirling in your head to the point you struggle to sleep. So you do what you always do: paint.
It’s not until one of these nights when you're up late at the canvas that you glance out of the window. Your heart stops. Someone is lying in Jamie's garden, very still. You dare to look closer. Is that..Jamie? He looks glassy eyed. He can't have...Without thinking, you run down.
"Jamie! Jamie!" Your heart is thumping in your ears so loudly you can't hear anything else. "Jamie are you okay?" You ask as you scramble to climb the fence. However just as you are almost over, you catch your foot, spectacularly falling over it into the bushes. You hear that trademark laugh.
"Why are you laughing? I thought you were dead, dipshit!" You say, crawling out of the shrubbery.
He remains lying down but he’s smiling at you now.
"Why would you think I was dead?"
"Why are you lying in your garden on your back completely still at 2am? Let's not pretend this is normal." You crawl down next to him.
“You’re going to think I’m stupid.”
“No I won’t.”
He looks away from you.
“I mean everyone else does, why wouldn’t you?”
“I don’t think they do.”
“There’s my dad. Plus, I’ve read Twitter.”
“You know how I feel about your dad and Twitter is full of very stupid people. But never mind them. I can promise you I don’t. And let’s be honest, I’m the only opinion that matters.” He scoffs as you offer him a pinky. But, he puts his pinky in yours before looking back up at the night sky.
"I can't get up."
"What? Are you injured?"
“No…I dunno, I told you it was stupid."
“It's clearly not that stupid. Are you okay Jamie?”
"I dunno. I was thinking about the other night with you and my dad and then I came outside because I needed some fresh air and then I lay down and started thinking about everything and now it feels like I'm stuck here. It's stupid -"
“Stop saying that.” You lie down and grab his hand. “Sometimes when you've gone through some shit, it comes out of your body in weird ways. But you're okay. We can stay here for as long as you like, but when we get up, you will be able to.”
He nods, and the two of you lie there holding hands in silence. You take some deep breaths and he follows. Eventually a small voice pipes up.
“I think I can go in now.”
You sit up and slowly pull him.
"See?"
He smiles at you gingerly before he looks down.
“You’re bleeding.”
“Huh?”
You look down. Both your knees are cut, along with one of your palms and your wrist.
“Yeah, that makes sense.”
He gently holds your wrist up to the light. He looks sad.
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. I need to work on my graceful dismount. Either that or just walk around to the back door.”
“I mean, I dunno, I think you could give Simone Biles a run for her money.” You swat him.
“Oi, you cheeky shit! Next time I’ll just leave you for dead.”
“I think the blood loss is going to your head, we should treat that ASAP.” He leads you into his house. “I think I’ve got a first aid kit upstairs.”
He starts walking up and you follow him. He seems surprised. You realise your error.
“Oh, I can wait downstairs if you like.”
“Er, no, it’s fine.” He steps into a bedroom and starts rummaging around in what is clearly an ensuite bathroom. You sit on the edge of his bed and look around. There’s pictures of him and his mum, as well as some pictures with the team and one with a slightly older moustachioed man.
“Is that your dad?”
He pokes his head out and laughs.
“No, that’s our coach Ted.” You look up at him. “He’s a nice guy though. Annoyingly nice. Almost too nice, if you know what I mean.”
“Right.” It was clear Jamie was soft on this man, but you wouldn’t push it today. He sits down and starts gently wiping the cuts. It is the same tenderness he held your foot, and it is the same tenderness that is slowly melting your heart. If you didn’t know any better, you would think you were starting to fall for Jamie Tartt.
You yawn as he applies the final plaster. “Right, you need to go to sleep.” He says, through his own yawn.
"I could say the same for you"
You sit up to leave, but hesitate. YOu feel Jamie’s about to say something.
“Hey, I don’t suppose.. You’d maybe fancy…”
You turn around.
“Staying around?”
Jamie looks at you pleadingly.
“No funny business I promise.” He looks up and offers you a pinky.
“What if I want funny business?”
“Eh?”
“I’m just messing with you Jamie. Besides, I’ve already stolen your knickers anyway.”
“Someone told me that’s a weird thing to say to people.”
“Well, that person sounds very wise.” You look around. “Can I use your bathroom?”
He gestures towards it and you go in. Looking at yourself in the mirror, you think: what the fuck is going on here? You splash some water on your face and tell yourself to get a grip.
“There’s a spare toothbrush in the blue pot if you need it.” Jamie calls through the door.
“Ew gross Jamie, I don’t want to use one of your many girlfriend’s toothbrushes!”
“I’ll have you know that’s brand new as I don’t have any girlfriends at the moment. Although there are sanitary towels if you need them love.”
“Piss off you patronising git!”
“‘Ey, I was trying to be nice and a good feminist and that.”
You brush your teeth before coming out and leaning against the doorframe.
“No girlfriends? What happened to the Island’s top scorer?”
He groans before flopping back onto the bed.
“I thought you didn’t know who I was.”
“I’ve been doing my research.” You get into the bed next to him. He flashes you a dirty grin.
“Bet you have, you little perv.”
“Me? The perv? What you did in that jacuzzi was a crime to my eyes, and probably in several countries.”
“Woah, you have been doing your research - that was like episode 42? 43?”
“What can I say, you make good television?”
Jamie pulls the duvet back before hovering for a moment.
“You don’t have to do this, you know.” He gestures to the bed.
“I know. But I’ve been in your position before, and I really needed a friend back then. And I think you would do the same.”
“Any time.”
You squeeze his hand.
“Now go to sleep, you menace.”
“Aye aye captain.”
____
You wake up and find yourself once again not in your own bedroom. In fact, not only are you not in your own bedroom, but you appear to be cuddling Jamie Tartt. You panic silently. Your leg is swung over his, while his arm is draped over you. You try to move, but still asleep, he squeezes you a little tighter. And then something really surprising happens.
He kisses you. Just a little kiss on the forehead, but your chest is fluttering. You hate to admit it but, it feels just so natural. You’re so content and relaxed in his arms then…
Fuck. You fell back asleep. You’re in the exact same problem as before.
This time however, you are both awoken by Jamie’s phone going off. He reaches to switch it off, eyes still closed, but then it rings again. And again. The third time his eyes shoot open.
“Shit!”
“What is it?” You ask from behind bleary eyes.
“The match!”
You slowly sit up and watch him run around and get dressed, silently handing him things on occasion. He runs downstairs and you plod along after him, still half asleep. He runs out of the door, before abruptly stopping and turning around.
“Aren’t you going to wish me good luck or something?”
You wrinkle your nose at him in confusion.
“I don’t need to. You’re going to smash it anyway.”
“How do you know that?”
You shrug and smile.
“I just know.”
At this point, he strides right up to you, before cupping your face in both his hands.
“Jamie what are -” Before you can finish, he kisses you, hard. Your eyes flutter closed and you melt into the kiss, before he pulls away, but only just. His arm reaches around the small of your back and his forehead touching yours, he whispers.
“Wait for me.”
He runs off to his car, and you stroke your bottom lip, where you trace the swell of where he used to be.
Your heart is still pounding and you are unsure what to do with yourself, so you try to make yourself at home. You take a very long, hot shower before getting changed. Of course, you didn’t have any clothes here, so you find some pyjama shorts along with one of Jamie’s old jerseys.
You sit down to watch the match. You had never really gotten into football, but now you were glued to the screen. You couldn’t believe that the little Jamie on screen was the same one who shared a bed with you last night. And the same Jamie that kissed you…
The game is electric, and Jamie in particular is the standout player. Even the commentators remark on his zest this match as he keeps skilfully weaving through the players to lead Richmond into not one, not two but three goals.
Once the match is done, you watch, still glued to your seat when Jamie is invited to an interview.
“Jamie the way you played today was extraordinary, against Man City too. If you don’t mind us asking, what happened?”
“Ah well, I was really inspired by Simone Biles. She’s honestly changed my life.” At that moment, he turns straight to the camera, grins and winks, and you feel like he’s somehow winking right at you. Your heart skips a beat. You were really in trouble.
You look at your phone and Jamie Tartt is trending. Simone Biles herself has already tweeted reminding everyone she is a married woman and has never met Jamie. There are plenty of other women, including some famous other gymnasts and celebrities offering their Biles-like services to Jamie in some rather explicit tweets. You wonder if Jamie reads these ones too.
You walk to the kitchen to make yourself a cup of tea and as you wait for the kettle to boil, you look at Jamie’s calendar. There’s all sorts of notes, primarily training and matchs but you notice your exhibit is there too, with a little heart drawn around it. Jamie never stopped surprising you. But then a cold shock goes down your spine. You remembered today’s date. You are meant to be going to the gallery this evening to plan the exhibition. Shit. You check the time. You’ve still got three hours left, but you need to get back into your flat ASAP. You scramble around before realising that you had left your phone in the flat last night in the chaos to get out. But you also remembered Jamie and what he had said.
Wait for me.
You write a little note and stick it on the fridge.
____
Jamie comes back way later than he planned. Of course, after the match, there were drinks and celebrations but he couldn’t concentrate on them, just trying to leave to get back to you. He finally manages to break away, but when he gets home, he finds the living room empty. He searches around the rest of the house, and you are nowhere to be found. He checks his phone. No messages. He gets a message through from Keeley about how he’s trending online.
Of course he sees all the Simone Biles stuff and smiles to himself. He made a note to send Simone Biles a message in future, if this all worked out. Then he sees all the stuff other women are saying online. A lot of it is quite graphic and he wondered what you’d think. He imagined the two of you laughing together at them. Then he sees. The tabloids are already speculating. Not only do they actually think he’s having an affair with Simone Biles, but they have already posted some paparazzi shot of him with Keeley, along with long extensive timelines of his tumultuous dating history. His stomach drops. Anyone would run away if they saw this much baggage.
He tries to ring you. Once, twice, three times, No pick up. He’s desperate and pacing, until he realises he can just walk over to your front door. He rings the bell several times, before loudly knocking. Still nothing.
He can’t believe how much he’s fucked it. He knew he shouldn’t have kissed you, but he couldn't help it. No one had made him feel like this, like he was going crazy but also that he was calmer than he had ever been, like riding a lifeboat in the centre of the storm. As he walks back into his flat and into his kitchen, he doesn’t see the small corner of a note that has fallen under the fridge. He checks his phone again.
Still nothing. What could he do?
____
Sorry for the angst kids, hope it was worth it and the finale will be juicy!! lmk if you want to be tagged in the final part!! Not sure if I've done these tags right, apols if not!!
@skewedcherries @e-mmygrey @reading-blogs @alex-sulli @cameoutstruggling93 @sqrlgrl22 @maydayfigment @aiyaiy @alipap3 @okkkkkkksure @city-of-cards
#ted lasso#ted lasso fanfic#jamie tartt x reader#fanfic#romance#jamie tartt x you#jamie tartt imagine#jamie tartt
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Do you have any asoiaf lines that live in your head rent free that aren’t the popular ones? Of course not my hair bed loves my hair, I dreamed I was old egg, it was her 14th name day etc are all replaying constantly but is there something under the radar you think about? For me I think it’s Jeyne Jeyne rhymes with pain, can you bring someone back without a head if he hadn’t died the 7 times just the once, and he had the right of it they all knew what this place was and none of them had told him his new brothers were thieves and rapers.
It doesn’t have to be sad I think those just stick out more for me personally. Like Jaime Brianne and cleos on the boat is so fucking funny it’s one of my fav scenes but I don’t remember what the lines were as much
love jaime telling tommen to go away in his mind, are you my mother thoros, for the first time in 400 years the night was alive with the music of dragons, obviously i dreamed of her but that IS popular so ill pick call her brienne, a nice oak tree (sorry i was am gendrya), jon remarking that tyrion's shadow was as tall as a king's, fly or die bran spread his arms and flew
honourary mentions to her cunt became the world and myrish swamp :3
#ask#Anonymous#also def jeyne jeyne rhymes with pain#i dont engage with jeyne poole much on here because i dont like thinking about it but dont take that as me hating her or something
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updated introduction post because the old one wasn't really that accurate anymore <33
the name's elliot, pronouns are he/him and i'm just here to have a nice time. i'm chronically ill and it sucks so i post about it quite a lot. i have many many interests and i think it'd be impossible for me to list them all. i really really love my chemical romance and hozier and hatsune miku and hello kitty (sanrio in general, really).
i live by the phrase "cringe culture is dead" and i believe in kindness above everything else <3 i try to find the good in most things and generally am just some guy trying to have a good time. also i'm really gay.
i think that's it?? i like playing games but i'm pretty awful at it and also just replay the same three constantly (undertale, omori and project sekai. pjsekai i'm actually decent at)
i love cats <33
okay i think that's it for real this time. sending much love to you all!!! i hope you have a good day <33 have some water and listen to your favorite song. bye bye! <3
p.s. some reoccurring tags under the cut
#on love -> big feelings and my love for life
#elliot talks -> literally all of my original posts
#elliot parla -> original posts but they're in italian
#on fashion statements and a fucking deathwish -> difficult emotions, vents, you name it
#i'm the kind of human wreckage that you love -> health/disability related posts
i don't always remember to tag posts and these are not on old posts but uh. i'll implement them more as time goes on i guess.
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i have no idea what episode this is part 2
part 2 of this post i think?? tbh i found the clip in some random youtube video i have no idea if this takes place directly after or not and im just judging based on the time of day/setting
(i actually did search through like. the last few episodes of season 1 and the first few episodes of shou and i couldnt find shit so i'm assuming that this episode happened in one of the places i didnt check. not for lack of trying but because the website i was using straight up died on the spot trying to load them all so quickly)
(edit: it's episode 16 of durarara season 1 ty @/pineapplething)
this screenshot is killing me actually. i had to pause instead of doing the 0.25 speed thing because i need his hands to be on his hips so it looks like he's just. staring down at the thing judgingly. izaya's pose is so funny because right before that he's like
'what the fuck are you doing shizu-chan'
i forget the context of this scene too but like. why wasnt he pointing the knife at shizuo?? what were they doing. bro i love not having ANY context whatsoever and being too lazy to look up the actual episode
anyway babygirl looks so ugly in those shots god bless
bro why you arching your back like that 🤨
in front of izaya too. god
the way they have four separate reaction shots for izaya. bro the things that must've been going on through his head were NOT safe for work on god.
the way he says 'seriously' and then remembers to point the knife like bro had to take a second. he was processing. he almost looks enamored in that first shot actually (<- delusional)
izaya's rectangle prism ass never ceases to amaze. glad he keeps that in both art styles
shizuo looks so funny from this angle i bet you could get the most unhinged smear frames every time he goes rage mode
can we get like an angry shizuo aesthetic moodboard except it's all either low quality or smear frames. it'd be really funny trust
also incredible how shizuo can extend the length of the guard rail to like. twice its size. it was not that big in the previous images. i wonder if that's a metaphor for something
god these SUCKED to get pictures of because celty comes in so fast and there's no indication of when the frames will switch but i do it for you (im doing this for me. im obsessed. i have a final on tuesday for the class i have a B in but actually i think it's a D now)
these would probably be much easier to screenshot if i just downloaded the videos but why would i do that when i can press the back arrow key 50 zillion times and listen to the crunchy 0.25 audio explode every time shizuo opens his mouth
this image gets me every time ugh they almost look like they were having a casual conversation or smth (<-delusional)
just. arch enemies both being distracted by something long enough to stop beefing with each other does something to me. i dont even know it doesnt have to be romantic i just like watching it (although it's usually romantic because im a sucker for enemies to/and lovers if you couldnt tell by my usual ships)
that's the end of this scene (or at least the youtube clip of it. you cannot ask me to load all those anime episodes again) but like man. good shit ill be replaying this in my brain for the next week or so
#shizaya#if anyone knows what episode this is...please tell me...im dying#im pretty sure it's sometime in shou and probably near the end but i cant load ittttttt#i need to know what happens after this so i can write a canon divergent fanfic of it where they go home and bang#izaya orihara#shizuo heiwajima#durarara
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Replay/Rewind/Restart
Chapter title: the pulse through the night/that sets my heart alight
AO3 Link
Getty | Cache
Rating: T
Summary: A series of one-shots focusing on different characters from the truly amazing fic Buy One [S]et One Free. (Please read it before reading this, it’ll be worth it, I promise!!) Some will be set before the story, while others will take place throughout it!
Everything here belongs to EeveeningNews, I’m just messing around in an attempt to express my love for this fic in the only way I know how.
The room was quiet, as it tended to be on a Thursday afternoon. The only noise at all came from the light clicks and taps on Getty’s keyboard, as he answered email after email in an effort to get his inbox cleared out before he clocked out for the day.
Tonight was special, after all, and he could not afford to work overtime.
At the exact second the clock changed to five-thirty, Getty sent his last email, and shut his computer down with shaking hands. His still form suddenly overflowed with energy as he practically leapt from his seat.
The rose-colored Addison darted over to his closet, replaying his memory of the conversation with Cache that had started all of this in the first place…
“Listen, cuz.” they’d said, before mentioning you by name. “I know how you are about asking her out…and let’s be real, I know you, period. So guess what? I’m feeling generous for once, I’ll ask her for you.”
Getty felt his heart begin to beat twice as fast. “Oh—oh goodness, Cache, y-you don’t need to do something like that for me! I’m perfectly content, I promise!”
“Uh-huh.” they hummed, clearly unconvinced. “So that’s why you didn’t spend the better part of our hangout gushing about her just the other day, right?”
“I—surely it wasn’t that long!” he protested, but he couldn’t quite meet Cache’s eyes.
“And that’s not even mentioning all the other times you’ve gone on about her, either.” they continued mercilessly. “What about that one lunch where we were supposed to catch up on everything and it turned into an hour-fucking-long presentation on the specific color of her eyes?”
“Now that is just blatant exaggeration.” Getty sniffed, folding his arms. “That degree of ill-mannered behavior suits you better than me, I would think.”
“So what I’m hearing is that you don’t want to go out with her, then?” Cache shot back, the corner of their mouth twitching as they restrained a smirk.
“N-no!” he cried. “I do, I just don’t want to put her in an uncomfortable situation where—you know, she might have to refuse, or she might not refuse but solely out of a sense of obligation…” He winced at the mere thought.
“And that’s exactly why I’ll be the one to ask her! She knows I ain’t the type to hide behind pretty words or some shit like that. I’ll know if she’s not being honest, too, so I can get you a straight answer. Alright?” they said, in a tone which very much suggested that they would do so even if it wasn’t alright.
“I couldn’t stop you if I tried, could I?” Getty asked, struggling to ignore the way he suddenly felt ill with nerves.
“Nope.” Cache said simply, finally allowing themselves that smirk from earlier.
Two days later, Getty had received a single text from his cousin.
She’s in.
…Getty beamed, scanning the contents of his closet for something appropriate to wear. The elation, the sheer delight he had felt upon reading those two words simply could not be described. He was finally going to properly spend time with you! Tonight!
A thread of fear blended into his joy at that particular thought. He had to make sure that everything was as perfect as it could possibly be. And that started with his outfit.
He selected some of his bolder items of clothing, hoping that his appearance would bolster his mood as it had many times before. A pastel yellow blazer completed the look, and he stepped in front of the mirror to double-check his choices, before taking out his phone and opening up a fun new gacha game to soothe his nerves until it was time to leave.
Ten minutes later, he was back in front of the closet, panicking. What if you expected something a little more formal? The reservation was for La Barre D’espace, after all. Rifling through the hangers, he pulled out a much more formal black-and-white ensemble, trying that on instead.
He eyed himself in the mirror, cringing at how stiff and washed-out it made him look. Perhaps…something a little more relaxed? But not too relaxed, that was why he’d picked out this second outfit in the first place!
Getty sighed, sitting down on his bed. After a moment, he eased himself into lying on his back, and then closed his eyes. “I’m being terribly silly, aren’t I?” he said out loud to the empty room.
Nobody replied (for which he was rather thankful, he would have been quite frightened if anyone had), but he suspected if Cache had been there, their response would be something rather like No duh, dingus. I wouldn’t set you up on a date with some jerk, so why’re you acting like she’s gonna tear you apart the second she lays eyes on you?
…they would probably swear more than that, but he wasn’t quite willing to simulate that particular trait of theirs at the moment.
Getty ran a hand through his hair, getting up from the bed once more to return to his closet and properly pick out an outfit. To be fair, the one he wore wasn’t terrible, it was just so…bland. He needed at least a pop of color, or else it wouldn’t be true to him, now would it?
Hmm.
Well, if he was trying to build an outfit that was true to him, he might as well use his own color, mightn’t he?
Slowly, he pulled off the black jacket he’d been wearing and replaced it with his favorite magenta vest. And this time, when he turned around to face the mirror, he finally felt ready to leave his room and head over to the restaurant.
When he picked up his phone, he saw that it was over an hour too early for him to leave on a normal night, although to be fair, this was not by any means a normal night. After all, what if traffic was bad (a surprisingly common occurrence in Cyber City)? Or what if you arrived early and were left there, all alone, waiting for him to show up? What a terrible first impression that would be!
Resolved, Getty set out immediately, walking his oft-traveled path through the halls of Queen’s mansion and giving any vases he saw an extra wide berth. He definitely wasn’t about to let something like that ruin this night.
As a matter of fact, if his hopes came true, nothing would.
When he stepped out into the lobby, luckily enough, there was already a blue-tinted Swatchling by the name of Cobalt lingering by the door of the Color Café, seemingly without a job to do. Getty approached him somewhat hesitantly, smiling. “Pardon me…I don’t mean to interrupt, but are you busy at the moment?”
Cobalt turned to him, his expression registering surprise for only the briefest of seconds before he relaxed back into a more work-appropriate, unruffled demeanor. “Ah, Master Target. I am unoccupied at the moment—is there anything with which I may assist you?”
“Well, yes, actually!” Getty beamed. “I have a, erm—��� his voice dropped momentarily as a light blush spread across his face— “A date, tonight. At La Barre D’espace. And since it’s rather far away, I was wondering if you might be available to chauffeur me there? Only if it wouldn’t be too much trouble, of course!” he added hastily.
Cobalt offered up the smallest of smiles at that. “Sir, it is my primary duty to assist the residents of Queen’s mansion with whatever they may possibly need. I am perfectly capable of driving you to La Barre D’espace. When would you like to depart?”
“Now would be lovely, if that’s alright.”
“Of course.” The Swatchling bowed briefly. “Merely permit me to inform Head Butler Swatch of my intended whereabouts, and then we may leave at once.”
“Oh, absolutely!” Getty replied, waiting politely just outside the café until Cobalt was ready.
Soon enough, the two entered a limousine, and they were on their way to the restaurant. Despite the fact that he was facing the window, Getty was so lost in his own thoughts that he hardly even noticed the city go by. Would you like the food? Had you ever been to a restaurant like this before? Would you like him now that he was more than just another paying customer? He’d never really spoken to you beyond requesting a meal back when you worked at that diner. What if—
He shook his head abruptly. There was no use working himself up so long before you would arrive. He wanted to be a good host and date, not a flustered mess!
Yet still, he struggled to keep his mind on lighter subjects, continuously circling back to the same few topics over and over again.
Halfway through the ride, however, Cobalt interrupted him in his pondering. “If you’ll pardon my curiosity, sir, who happens to be the lucky person invited on this date?”
Getty blushed once again at the implication that you were lucky to be invited to spend time with him—if anything, he felt that the reverse was true. After a moment, he found his voice once again. “She’s a Lightner, actually. Her name is—” He smiled as he said your name, remembering the very first time you had introduced yourself to him. Even back then, when he had only just been hit with the true extent of his own feelings, he had found himself particularly struck by your friendliness and warmth in spite of the difficult job you worked. It was truly stunning. “She is one of the most wonderful people I’ve ever had the opportunity to meet, and funnily enough, she’s actually quite close friends with my cousin!”
“Your cousin? I would say I find myself surprised, Master Target, but since they seem to enjoy your company so much, I suppose it only makes sense that they would choose to spend time with others who are equally suited to you.” the Swatchling mused.
Getty chuckled softly. “You make a very good point, Cobalt.” he replied.
“Well, if she is half the person that I know you are, then I am certain you two will have nothing to worry about.” Cobalt added, making Getty smile bashfully.
“Oh, thank you! You’re far too kind.” the rose-colored Addison insisted gently.
“I would protest that statement, but I am afraid that shall have to wait until later. We have arrived at La Barre D’espace now, sir.”
Getty jolted slightly, surprised. “Already? Oh my! Thank you very much, Cobalt. Will you be available after we have finished as well?”
“Certainly. I shall be right here until you are ready to leave.”
“Thank you again!” Getty said, stepping out of the car once Cobalt opened the door for him.
“I sincerely hope that you enjoy your date, sir.” Cobalt said, offering him another hint of a smile before stepping back into the car.
“I hope so as well.” Getty murmured to himself, taking a deep breath as he approached the building.
He made his way inside and over to the elevator, stepping inside and pressing the button for the top floor. The car stopped a few times during its ascent, and each time Getty held the door for those who were entering and exiting, earning him several smiles and as many “Thank you”s in the process. However, not a single person seemed to recognize him, for which he found himself grateful. He wasn’t entirely sure that he would have been able to manage the nerves stemming from his relatively new wealth and his date-nervousness all at once, at least not without failing to maintain his usual calm demeanor.
Mustering up what remained of his courage, Getty walked up to Cardinal, the Swatchling working at the host stand for this evening. “Hello there, Cardinal!” he said warmly. “I believe my reservation is under a different name than usual for tonight. My cousin, Cache, is the one who organized this particular dinner.”
“Ah, I see. Yes, Mx. Cache is indeed the one listed here. Thank you very much for informing me, Mr. Target.” Getty cringed internally upon realizing that he would probably be referred to as such in front of you. He had never had the chance to explain his nickname properly when you worked at the diner, so now he just had to hope that he could correct any misconceptions you had about his preferred name before one of the Swatchlings irrevocably gave you the wrong idea.
Cardinal informed him which table he and you would be sitting at, and he made his way back through the restaurant, having been here more than enough times to find his own way to any table at all. He smiled, taking a seat at this particular one, which was one of the nicest in the entire restaurant. It featured a lovely view of Cyber City, one that he sincerely hoped you would enjoy.
Before he could begin to even consider worrying once more, Saffron approached him with a couple of menus tucked under one wing. “Good evening, Mr. Target. I hear you are waiting on someone in particular?”
“Yes, Saffron! I’m afraid I’ve arrived dreadfully early, so she won’t be here for quite some time. Could I just have my usual drink for now, while I wait for her?” Getty asked politely.
“Of course, sir. I shall have it brought out to you shortly.” Saffron bowed lightly, before leaving the Addison alone again.
Getty spent a few minutes people-watching in an effort to amuse himself, trying to see how many repeat customers he could spot in the restaurant tonight. He definitely recognized many of the Addisons there, as well as a few Plugboys and one or two Werewires. It took him several more minutes to recall all of their names (as well as their most recent purchases), by which point his drink had arrived.
After thanking the Swatchling who had brought his glass, Getty took a small sip, feeling his shoulders relax slightly at the familiar flavor. Soon enough, however, he found himself lost in another memory—this time of the first moment he’d ever seen you.
The Color Café was even busier than usual that day, and his second choice of restaurant was closed as well because the chef had come down with a virus. Honestly, at this point, he’d be content with just about anything, so long as it was food and he could get it in something approximating a timely manner.
Suddenly, Getty spotted one diner that was normally too busy for him to even consider, but seemed to be having a slow day today. Feeling slightly apprehensive (but mostly just desperate) he pushed open the door and stepped inside, putting on his usual salesman’s smile.
At first, he didn’t notice any workers, only a few sparse patrons at various tables. Just as he was about to feel truly concerned, though, a voice spoke up from the back of the diner.
“Good morning! How are you today?”
And Getty nearly bluescreened at the sight.
He knew that he was a bit of a hopeless romantic (or perhaps more than a bit, really), but somehow, he’d never had all that many romantic moments happen to him…until now. The Lightner working at the diner—and how was a Lightner working at a diner??—was by far the most gorgeous person he had ever seen.
Time stopped. His heart pounded. Your sweet, warm smile lit up the room, and he nearly melted at the sight.
Suddenly, he remembered that you’d asked him a question. “O-oh! Perfect, thank you, absolutely wonderful!” he managed to stammer, feeling as though his legs might give out at any moment.
“I’m Getty, by the way.” he added shyly. “He/him, if you please.”
“Oh! It’s so nice to meet you!” you said brightly. “I’m—well, it says it right here on my name tag, doesn’t it?” You laughed briefly at that, before continuing onwards. “Um, she/her works just fine for me.”
You opened your mouth, about to say something else, when a voice rang out from the back of the diner. “Oi! Lightner! You’d better not be slacking off out there!”
You jumped, the brightness disappearing from your face instantly. Getty silently mourned the sight. “S-sorry!” you called, before turning back to him and flashing him a shadow of the smile you’d worn before. “Feel free to pick whatever seat you’d like, I’ll be over as soon as I can to take your order!” You snatched up a menu and handed it to him, before dashing off to speak with whoever had just yelled at you.
Getty sat down at a booth by the window, frowning in concern. At any other point in time, he would have noticed that the diner wasn’t quite as tidy nor as beautiful as the places he normally preferred to frequent, but right now, he was consumed with worry for the lovely person he’d just met.
Were you being mistreated here? Or was this just a bad day? And were you really the only server in the entire place? If so, then he couldn’t imagine the kind of stress you must be under, and he settled in to wait for you to be finished with the other patrons.
You took rather longer to return than Getty would have liked, but your profuse apologies more than banished any hints of frustration he might have felt. Admittedly, the food was…also less than stellar, but the way you smiled every time he showed you even the smallest scrap of kindness made his heart flutter and ache simultaneously.
Before he had even paid the bill, he knew he’d be returning here tomorrow.
Getty blinked, rousing himself from his reminiscing and looking briefly around the room. The same people were mostly there, but Cardinal was currently showing someone new to their seat. He glanced back out the window, not wanting to stare as they walked through the restaurant—
Wait.
It was you.
Getty nearly gave himself whiplash with how quickly he looked back over in your direction. You looked utterly stunning, clearly having both dressed up very nicely and done your hair specially for the occasion. It felt like that first day at the diner all over again, except so much better, because now there was no rude manager, no difficult work, and no poor quality food.
Just you…and him.
Getty jumped up out of his seat, his eyes meeting yours as he prepared to speak, and he felt his heart pound.
Goodness, he hoped he was ready for this.
#deltarune#deltarune addisons#pink addison#spamton g spamton#spamton x reader#(those last two are for the main fic)#(trying to get it some more readers because it's literally one of my favorite fics ever!!)#i didn't like x readers for the longest time but this one is just SO WELL WRITTEN#anyhow hope this was fun to read :)#it certainly won't be the last time i mess around in this universe!
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Theres never a second chance
I see what you done.
You think its alr to just break my heart,
I think its mad how u cant even look back
When i gave you all i had
you think its okay to have me thinking abt you,
When you reject me every chance you get
you dont deserve me anymore ik for a fact tell me what you want i dont want you in my life,
every blink of an eye just shatters my heart alive.
Your looking at me like u haven't helped me get back up
I miss u every night knowing your not tryna ring me up
Showers in the morning and ringing at night,
Phones were always awake counting our time we gave.
Memories playing in my head like its singing on replay
To me it was never a game when i said i love you through every truth or dare.
Its hard to move on with my life when were walking through the same gate every night
I was happy with just friends but you didnt even want that less
Just friends sound wrong i get but we couldve tried again
You acted like a child when we shouldve just tried next time
But you didnt want me back aswell as loving me right now for sure You didnt love me enough as you never said it back
I gave you time but you didnt even think twice wanted space
but that space was a never ending game
better that way
You caused me more pain then making me feel great
U want someone better its sad you'll never find me again
U never warned me that your gonna leave one day
You said me and you were a forever type of game,
But u left without saying good days
Whatever will happen in the next few years
Ill love you but ill never take you back in my arms again
You broke me too hard and i definitely know it will never be wiped from my mind.
Im tired of getting attached just so that u leave and break my heart.
I cry every night but it dont look like you give two fucks.
Knowing you your just gonna turn ur whole body around.
Im tired…
I dont understand how you can stand there and act like im going mad when i warned u that i wont be able to stand back up
You did me soo dirty no explanation pressed that button wiv no hesitation ur acting like its all my fault but when i opened my phone that x was already popping up my phone
Thank you for the time we had
It was fun and i was living my life
Have a nice live they say but when I see your face it's just a look of disgrace. I hope you'll see that i'm your biggest mistake.
I'll be better off happy
And wiv somebody fresh
The clock has been ticking for 7 months
U havent say a single ‘yo’ or even a ‘i missed you so much’
Begging didnt gain me nth neither did hoping
Both a waste of time praying there will be a massive difference
Thank you for the time we had
It was fun and i was living my life
Written by anonymous
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....... ALSO.
he likes when i compliment his voice I REALLY DO LOVE IT THOUGH. when i say youve been blessed by the tessie gods i REALLY mean that, genuinely. love when yr telling me about yr day, love when yr making absolutely bizarre autistic noises, love when you sing . YOU ARE SILLY!!!!!!!! ive genuinely. no i just LIKE YOU okay. me when i like you? me when i enjoy my best friend??? listened to those fucking stupid DUMB VOICE MESSAGES YOU SENT LIKE. ON LOOP.. to hear yr terrible awful jokes yes but also to hear yr laughter??? LIKE I WAS. TEEEHEHEEH... JOY. WHIMSY EVEN
i still will never forget that time she screamed exactly like a chimpanzee ripping someones face off during namielle fight that genuinely is one of the best moments of my life im. I PUT THAT MEMORY IN AFUCKING PICTURE FRAME AND REPLAY IT ALL THE TIME its so good. i like her voice too!!!!!! even when shes breaking the sound barrier SHES. I HAVE THE SILLIEST FRIENDS IN THE WORLD FOR REAL/??? plus shes always saying the craziest shit like the way she'll go from dumb little termite to spitting poetry completely unprompted, like AWARD WINNING POETRY. LIFE CHANGING POETRY and then shes back to bug.
theyre both so talented too like. i wonder if i tell them that enough? I HOPE I DO BUT.. no im so. IM YR BIGGEST FAN ALRIGHT ill always be here rooting for you cuz THEYRE SO GOOD AT WHAT THEY DO... fantastic art, fantastic writing, mans playing the trumpet!!!!!!!!!!!! also the way he just talks about like. MUSIC THINGS TO ME, i dont understand a lot of it but i still love to listen so much like. YES SIR!!! 5/4 TIME SIGNATURE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! do i know what this means, NO !!! but i still think its cute to listen to. AUTISM is always condoned here. the way shes always coming up with shit, i genuinely. i dont give a SHIT about that game at a base level, all of my appreciation comes from the shit shes come up with ITS THE ONLY THING PUSHING ME FORWARD...... so smart genuinely like. im fascinated by it i want to inspect her under a microscope (short joke) HOW ARE YOU LKE THIS... she just keeps creating and creating and its SO. endearing i love how they just create things all the time really i cant get enough IT MAKES ME SO PROUD TO SEE ANY OF IT.. guys please keep being you forever and always, even if you never see this PLEASEE keep shining okay you are so . good isnt a strong enough word, wonderful maybe.. everything!!!!! you are everything
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Why MazM Raoul SOLOS!!!
Raoul haters dni/j. You guys know how I feel abt him from when I was replaying MazM POTO but I'm putting it into an actual post + tagging. This is gonna be long so buckle up.
The plot/characters of MazM POTO is kinda weak, and it's a little debatable on if Raoul's character is purely reliant on the decline of Christine and Erik's characters. But I'll just talk about him individually.
My first point here will be analyzing him alone, who he is without Christine.
Raoul on his own:
Raoul is very very childish on his own. The art makes him look quite baby and from the get-go you can tell how naive he is. When he first comes into the opera house with Philippe, he makes so many jokes. For example when Jammes asks who he is, he jokes that he is Philippe's son, which pisses him off and causes him to scold Raoul. Then when Philippe tells him to stay in their box seat, he decides to go in the one besides theirs, Box 5, to play a little prank on him. 10 PM PRANK GONE WRONG GONE VIOLENT!!! Carlotta constantly reminds him of his drill sergeant and makes him whimper. Lawd she is real for that. You almost forget he was part of the navy with how much he pouts.
In Christine's dressing room, when he is snooping around, he's like oh Philippe's gonna ground me for months if he finds out. Dude youre 20. And when Christine tells him she can't go out a certain hour he's like oh you have curfew? I understand. Like I know curfew might've been a *thing* back then like there's context to it probably. But between that and the grounding it does feel like Raouls life had been placed under restrictions for his protection.
When Richard pisses him off, he splatters ink all over his music scores and goes "oopsies silly me" and Richard starts going OFF at him abt how that's his important music scores and Raoul goes "That's music??? I've done a favor to the world by rubbing it off." LIKE???? He's a fucking brattttt. He's absolutely childish sometimes and I love it. But he definitely has a good heart. He calls out Philippe for playing with Sorelli's heart later on and how scummy it is. He goes to the managers when Christine gets ill and asks them if they treat their employees well, and while later on it teeters into the Christine obsession, he still wanted benefits for all the singers in a sense. AND he tells them off for conspiring with the police to cover up Buquets death to the point he becomes enough of a problem that they get Remy to kick him out. In the torture chamber when the Daroga is relaying Erik's backstory to him, he's like wow that's horrible :(((. He is a sweet guy. And I'll admit MazM fucked up when they blamed Hatim for Erik's actions, and Raoul shouldn't have been a mouthpiece for that sentiment, I am purely taking what can be said about Raoul here. Raoul gets pissed when he sees injustice, not just in the name of Christine. When the Daroga goes off at him for being privileged (French and White) and scoffing at Middle Eastern governments, Raoul holds his tongue and apologizes. Like he knows his place.
He's smart too, he's reasonable enough to know La Epoque is just a gossip magazine and absolute BULLSHIT. He knows the management is just dogshit and calls their asses out for it. He graduated with honors!!! He gets along quite well with the other characters that aren't Christine and his interactions with them fill him out quite a bit.
But that isn't all that MazM added to him.
Translation Through Time
Now, a part of why people can't sympathize with Raoul in the original book is because he is seen as a privileged brat, and he certainly acts so. His appeal as a character is lost through time as what was seen as extraordinary back then (giving up everything for your lowerclass lover) is to be expected nowadays. MazM translates that struggle into something more relatable to modern day audiences which would be a sense of golden child syndrome. Raoul is held to a standard by his family. In the original book he doesn't throw up much of a fight besides when it got between him and Christine. But here, when he lashes out at Philippe, he straight up says he never wanted anything Phillippe forced onto him. He didn't consent to the army and yet was enlisted because it'd be good for his family. He's considered the black sheep of the family and people gossip about him and he knows it. Raoul was fully ready to die in the Artic, he had nothing to his name and wanted to please his family, until Christine came back in his life. He wanted to make his own choices for once and being with Christine was his choice. Which leads to another thing about him:
His Lack of Agency and Childishness
To touch back on the point about Raoul's childishness: he doesn't know better. He has led a sheltered life, doted and pampered on by Philippe yes, but still sheltered. He had been taught to stay in line and hadn't experienced the real world. As a result he is quite pent up and doesn't exactly know what to do with himself when he's upset. Combine that with his lack of agency where hes constantly forced to live a certain way, well, you have a pipe bomb. He is childish in the sense of, quite literally he thinks like one at times. Children aren't evil or malicious or anything, just naive. They can be selfish. Raoul had been selfish to Christine many times, and it is not out of a sense of wanting to hurt her, moreso he doesn't realize what he's doing. This is not to remove his agency, not at all. He is an adult. This is about his subconscious actions and what he doesn't realize about himself.
Raoul With Christine
Christine brings out the very best in Raoul, and his worst, not her fault however it's just collateral. Raoul never curses Christine out like he did in the original book. He loves her whole-heartedly. Although there is the scene where he taunts her for crushing his flowers. Again I feel that ties more into his childish selfish side, bc. It felt very childish of him to poke at her like that.
I don't know if I'm tweaking, but considering how MazM was pushing a narrative of making choices in this game, like Christine learning to make choices for herself or Erik choosing not to let go, I feel as if this isn't coincidental. Raoul's choice to run away with Christine is a very important one. Raoul had loved Christine since he was a child. As an adult he loved her even more, she was a breath of fresh air to him as she never expected anything of him, she was a choice. When Raoul is helpless to help her during Erik's terrorization, he was miserable! He was lashing out at everyone because he didn't know who to trust or what to do. He could give the world and still it couldn't fix the situation. And thus his pushiness and toxicity came from a place of overcompensation. He wanted to be so sure of himself that he could protect Christine. He wanted her to be fully his.
His lowest point is when he barks at Christine to hand over Erik's ring even after she expressed her discomfort and anxiety. Raoul rlly went I have a pistol and a dream. And yeah this is his worst, but that doesn't mean he was beyond redemption.
Redemption
Raoul begs and cries in the torture room for Christine. He really does seem apologetic and regretful. He asks Christine if she wanted to hear about Erik's backstory. Raoul hated Erik! And the fact he is treating him with such compassion that Christine doesn't show??? </3
Christine's compassion had been butchered near the end. While they are burying Erik's body, there is a choice to be made asking if you wanted to put the ring on Erik or not. If Christine asks to throw it away, Raoul says to wait a minute. He explains that he doesn't say what he's about to say out of sympathy but rather what he would want if he were in Erik's position. He treats Erik like a human when he says "If my body were to show up one day unknown, I would at least want something to be able to identify me." He treats Erik like a fellow man which is just... so sweet. He acts as a foil to MazM Erik. While Erik refused to change for the better and stayed a bitter hateful man, Raoul changed to make sure Christine would be happy and safe. That is hella growth. He tells Christine about while he was in the torture room, the enraged man he saw in the mirror wasn't him but a monster. He is terrified that he ever put Christine through that version of himself. At the ending, while he pushes Christine to marriage again, Christine calls him out, and he catches himself and goes "I'm so sorry." He doesn't fix himself immediately bc that is not how growth works, but he is definitely on the path to growth. Christine tells him she wants him to change for himself, not for her. The ending where he is with Christine is a happy ending however. What I don't see often is people talking about the other ending.
Raoul Alone
In the ending where Raoul and Christine part their seperate ways, people talk about Christine's side a lot. However, Raoul's side of the story is fascinating and marks his own growth. He's free from the Chagny family, no money no connections. He didn't even attend Philippes funeral. He had been disowned but he didn't even feel as if he deserved to go. He's traumatized from Philippe's death but he's keeping it in. Philippe was like a father to him, as cruel as he got sometimes. They still loved each other very much. He gave it all up for Christine, so the ending where they part ways???? It's so bittersweet. He is left alone and traumatized, but his new life was solely his. He will find happiness again, as hard as it will be. Even if he was a pampered spoiled child, he isn't that anymore. He had grown and matured while still keeping his kind heart. He will move on as Christine had moved on.
Can you guys tell I love him.
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Does the world really want to be seen?
Grand rising mon coeur. I hope you have slept well. I had a wicked dream, not scary, just twisted, like always. The sun is rising and hitting the trees just right this morning. I let my eyes soak in the beauty like a sponge and remember I woke up me again.
I always style my daughter’s hair in the mornings. I’m really working on teaching her what self care means. She was on her phone, scrolling through instagram reels, and it reminded me how insanely desperate social media is.
I found myself grateful for pulling myself out of the cluster fuck of doom. It’s like we get stuck in a world so artificial and wonder why we have anxiety when we maneuver around the real world in real time. I do not miss it. I do not miss aimlessly putting bits and pieces out into the world. I like doing that here. Writing is so much more mentally rewarding and immensely productive. It’s like training my mind to think in ways I wouldn’t always think and I like that challenge.
It’s so easy to do stupid shit online. I’ve been there. I’d much rather indulge in my mind power than anything else really. I look forward to reading more than I ever had in my entire life.
I find myself less angry by the day. Accepting more of myself each time I reveal something new inside of me. It’s such a great feeling of accomplishment, one you can only give yourself. I find myself being more patient with the world.
My outlook on life itself has become much deeper and the relationship with myself has become much more complex yet so intimate. There are days that I find myself wishing to share this intimacy, but all in due time. I love the actual connections I have been making with real human beings in the physical world. It’s much more satisfying and rewarding to my spirit. Like I’m some type of rebel starting an invisible movement.
I no longer reach into the cesspool of garbage hoping to find treasure because I am the treasure. The world will convince you that you are mentally ill if you let it, not knowing that the entire world is contagious with mental disease.
I spoke with my father for a good while yesterday and I miss him. I hope that he decides to drive down and see me soon.
My drive to know the world personally has driven me into myself time and time again. I love the passion and love that I put into the process of experiencing myself. I no longer look for a space to fit in because I am the space. I am never empty, I am full of infinite possibilities, time, energy, progress, love, intention. My intelligence keeps me warm and glowing in a way that is impossible to get from the warmth of others, and I love that about me.
I am no longer bound by the strings of an imaginary puppeteer, I am a real woman. There are times that I wish to reengage in the show but I am not here to entertain anyone but my potential. I thrive on the outskirts, I always have. I am erasing years of moving in the name of other people and it can be terrifying but the amount of courage that is gained could never compare to the amount of fear that it takes to get through the veil. So many gurus out there calling themselves healers and I laugh a little because healers don’t call themselves healers, they just heal.
Yes, we may all be “one” but if you are supplying this oneness without the help of the “others” then you will be left with nothing still wanting everything. The phrase “I only want what wants me” keeps replaying in my head all morning and I take it as a good omen, I run with it. It will be the drive of this day.
Today, all the bones in my body are electric.
-x
#diary#happy friday#it’s friday#girl interrupted#i’m just a girl#girl blogger#blog#girly blog#blogger#tumblr diary#diaryposting#personal diary#poetic#writeblr#writing#writers and poets#poetry blog#poetry#spilled writing#deep writing#free writing#free write#writblr#writers on tumblr#writerscommunity#just my thoughts#deep thinking#that bitch#seriously though#earth angel
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animation meme autism (gives you war flashbacks)
I HAVE SO MANY ANIMATION MEME IDEAS BUT LET ME MAKE A LIST OF OLD ANIMATION MEMES I LOVE LOVE LOVELVEOVELVEOVEL AND HOPE TO MAKE ONE DAY
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THIS ONE THTHITHSITHSITHISH OK SO I HAVE SOMETHING IN MIND FOR LAVENDER. SO LIKE. more like some backstory-ish stuff so like aging her up till shes the person she is now but still with her inner child.
thing i have in mind is to start off with the questions from her parents, friends till deshaun.
honestly this is either for lavender or advil because i can easily see advil working with this too. personally going from like. every they know so like. near, copy, deshaun and ryuk(i feel like they should know ryuk) but im not completely sure, i feel as if its either ryuk or kaito (i am establishing that they actually know eachother right now)
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IM GONNA BE SO HONEST RIGHT NOW THIS ONE IS JUST BECAUSE I NEED A LITTLE BIT OF HAPPINESS IN MY LIFE. im thinking that like this should just be sunflower ship animation. why? because my brain is rotted. its either that or rudy x tobias!! its like same thing different font at this point! nothing special to say about this one (the animation is also just really fun and cute)
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OK OK LOOK. ok no dont look this is just. a really good song.. thinking it should be like maybe tobias for this im sosadf tobias is the only in mind for this like genuinely
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OKOKOKOKOKOKO THIS ONE IS JUST TOO ICONIC!!! this one should just be my sona with either molly or your sona (maybe even both! no reaver though because he doesnt really have a sona ref or snything.,,,,) i just cant do this iconic one i remember replaying this a shit load of times
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ANOTHER ONE THATS JUST BECAUSE ITS CUTE mostly thinking about advil for this one just cuz advil needs more art also i love advil so much
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OKOK THIS ONE THISIHTISHTIS I JUST WANT TO INFODUMP ABOUT JUNICHI (THE MC OF PHANTOMS AWAKENING!!) i love thinking about them so much
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IM SO CRINGE I KNOW BUT I WILL NEVER NOT THINK ABOUT THIS ANIMATION MEME!!!!!!!! this one could be with anyone ill be so honest but youknow. i can defo see this as an emilio / omori thing if i do make it omori themed id make it more pointing towards my future au design
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CHOICE!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS ONE I WANT TO MAKE THIS GENTLE SKIES THEMED I WANT THE MAIN CHARACTERS TO BE CENTERED IN THIS EXP RAY AND CLOUD i adore writing their fucked up little sotry so much its insane
but tbh animation memes like hotmilk, time lapse and hottudoggu still plaque my mind. i dont think ill ever stop thinking about them!! but thats fine.. holds hand out..
lets be cringe about animation memes..... together holds hand out
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i was supposed to leave a review at the very end of the game but the recent chapters have been so MIND BLOWING !!! AMAZING!!! SO MUCH HEART AND SOUL AND THOUGHT (and thirst ❤️) put into this game!!! i thank your beautiful crewussy selves for all your hard work!! thank you for letting me see my andy and my tom again 🥺 (ALSO IM BAKING YALL VIRTUAL COOKIES FOR THAT ROMANCEABLE DAN YALL ARE THE GIFTS THAT KEEP ON GIVING). i dead ass just finished my playthrough of ilitw before ch16 and I just bawled my eyes out til 4 am... then spent the rest of my days theorizing and fanficcing and crying again- but aaa so excited to see the rest of the story unfold!
p.s. originally had like one main save file where I devoted all my love and lust to abel my beloved babygirl nerd cutie pie BUT NOW I THINK IMMA HAVE A SHITTON OF REPLAYS/SAVE FILES TO SEE EVERY VARIANT AND TRY EVERYONES ROUTES (well im gonna mooch of my gfs lincmancing screenshots bc he is too much of w son but its ok ill be the cooler dad#2 after marrying his dad) BECAUSE THE MAIN CAST ARE JUST SO LOVELY!! CAN I GET A "RO U FUCKING HO" UP IN HEEEEERE WOOO.
p.p.s. PLS ENJOY UR BREAK 💜
🥹🥹 thank you so much!! This ask is so sweet! I’m glad you’re having such a good time with the game and that you love our cast (Though I recommend doing a Linky route too if you’re doing all the other ones anyway, bc he is so good 😭 he’s also good as a platonic bestie too though so) thank you for the love and support and cookies and we can’t wait for Ch 17. 😈
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can u give us some bloodborne/souls trivia
omg omg where do I even start.
(no, really, where do I even start. the answer would be very different depending on whether you've played the game or no (I shall assume you have not??). also I will only talk about Bloodborne because there are too many DS games lol and Bloodborne's lore is way more interesting.)
ok ok so Bloodborne follows the player's character, The Hunter, who has been transported to and trapped in Yharnam, a city succumbing to the Beastly Scourge - a blood-borne illness that is turning its residents into strange and horrifying beasts. We, The Hunter, hunt them as we attempt to find and understand the source of this illness and put a stop the scourge.
The events of the game seemingly take place over the course of a single night, and the game has distinct stages depending on the stage of the moon. These moon stages affect the world, so no areas are exactly the same if you traverse them again as the night has progressed. For example, some enemies fall asleep, and some NPCs change as they succumb to the illness (or simply madness) as the night advances (such as everyone's favorite NPC, window guy Gilbert)
Bloodborne has a stat called Insight - it measures The Hunter's knowledge of the true world around them, above what mere humans can usually see and understand. The more crazy shit you stumble upon and the more important enemies you defeat, the more your insight grows.
The game world that the PC perceives changes depending on how much insight they have - the more insight into the world and its true workings, the more the player can see. For example, previously invisible things become visible, enemies change or appear where they previously would not, things animate and come to life, etc.
The game has 3 possible endings (each with dramatically different implications for The Hunter). Which one the player will get will depend on how they interact with certain items in the game and on the player's own choices. One ending gives one extra super cool boss fight, and one gives 2 extra super cool boss fights hihi
There is a lot of like. cosmic level fuckery going on in Bloodborne. Nothing is as it seems and you should always doubt whether the places you encounter are the real world or no.
Random tidbit but I really love this: one of the objectively coolest and scariest monsters in the game is the Amygdala, named (and modelled) after the amygdala part of the brain which is responsible for processing fear
(The Amygdala has a very important role in the lore, which makes all of this brain shit even cooler)
Big for me! The Hunter is canonly non-binary B-)
(as shown in the bloodborne comics)
Why Bloodborne slaps and should be played by all:
Epic as shit
Fun. fast and interesting and intense
SP00KY in some parts
GREAT lore.
(also very complicated lore. took me so many replays and so many hours of listening to video essays to understand it lol.
in its essence it's a great & complicated story of human greed and foolishness, and our insignificance in the great scheme of things).
Strong vibes. Dark and gothic. mmm I love that shit. fuck!
it's all about the Lovecraftian-ism of it all
Cool & sexy outfits
(every day I wish I looked like a Bloodborne character)
TRICK WEAPONS
Epic soundtrack
(arguably contains the best ever FromSoftware boss soundtrack) (mmm when that Ludwig the Accursed/Ludwig the Holy Blade hits)
It's difficult and I like that. I don't like easy games.
& many more!
#thank you for asking this buddy pal friend i love talking about this#hihihi#anyway this all makes no sense. sorry. what even was the question. why am I typing this all out at 2am#giving a hug and a head pat and a lollipop to you anon#uhh yeah.#in essence:#Bloodborne!! *vibrates*
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I have this special someone that i always deny. his name is D. from the fist time i saw him, he already gets my attention. Hes soo academically cool. hes too smart and amazing to the point that i begun liking him in our 2nd quarter period. every time that i get a gleams of him.... wtf it made my day!. I dont know what happen why i have this crazy feeling towards him. cupids are sometimes so mean... at our 3rd quarter period i hear this rumors that he likes me too and like i look still that nothing and yeahh but deep in side i want to explode! my mind scream yess i do! i mean i am too. i like you. However i have to be still. i cant show any emotions i need to compose my self. i like him too much to disappoint him so for now i should just continue denying... for him not to get hurt and to save my self from the pain. I have to hide my feelings for you for now. but if the time is right and we can be still together I'll be the one to even insist to court you. sounds funny but i really mean it. i am too inlove that i always imagine us both talking and laughing together. those simple gleams of your eyes and whole handsome face, memories that we share together that i repeatedly replay in my mind those are my happy memories of you. I always think of you really. i want to know what you are doing. i want to see you every day. hear your voice and check on you. i worry every time i see that you don't care. i over think things whenever i see weird expression on your face. i also worried about what might you think when you hear my scores in quiz or test. i fucking adore your laugh, your smiles and weird mannerisms, also your childish actions and personality. i love how you understand the hard topics that i cant digest and made it too easy.... i feel like this is crazy and bad. i know my limits okay. for now its better that we stay like this. what is the point of admitting my feelings now if i can make out of it more in the future. i know the circumstances that is ahead i am too inlove to you to ruin that so for now let me just prepare my self and everything... coz you deserve the best and i want to be the one who can give you exactly that... i hope that you are really the one that ill be spending the rest of my marred life with.
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