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macfrog · 6 months

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walking through fire | one shot

just something that's been on my mind the last few weeks. i hope that you're all ok going into this difficult time of year. and if there's any part of this, big or small, that you find yourself resonating with - there will always be a warm, cozy chair in my inbox/dms, free for you to come sit, hang; we can talk about everything or nothing at all. love you guys. 🤍

pairing: joel miller x fem!reader

summary: you’re neck-deep in a bout of seasonal depression. your boyfriend suggests an autumnal walk. (better than most healthcare systems offer amarite)

warnings: quite literally about depression & anxiety so please read at your own discretion. established relationship, fluffy soft!joel takes care of his girl, implied suicidal thoughts, use of medication to treat depression/anxiety, feelings of worthlessness/burdening, but hope! in the end! a wee sliver of hope!

word count: 2.7k

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November turns on itself all too quickly.

Your body feels like lead, sinking deep into the mattress. Like a broken, rusted shipwreck at the bottom of the ocean; your hand lying limp above the bedsheets like a sailor’s last attempt at reaching over the waves for help.

Joel opened the blinds today. Nuzzled into you, the scruff of his beard sharp on your numb skin, and then stood up and slowly unveiled the glaring light of white cloud. You shrunk further into the bed, your hot breath suffocating you under the sheets. Inhaling and exhaling, breathing in your own rotten air.

He pushes the door open and shuffles across to the bed. Your sea dips when he lowers into it, two arms slipping around your waist like a lifebuoy. He pulls you into his chest; his warm body melting the ice of your bones.

“Hey,” he whispers, and drags his nose across your cheek. He kisses your temple, combs his fingers through your hair. Dabs his thumb along your bottom lip and then says again, “Hey, darlin’. You awake?”

Your eyes flutter open, only enough to see the blurry shape of him; the strong curve of his shoulder, the binary of dark cotton and pale skin.

“Hi, baby. How you feelin’ this mornin’?”

The words catch on the dry cliff of your throat, dangling for a few seconds like panicking climbers, before plummeting into the abyss. You settle for an incoherent mumbling, a vibration on your lips that Joel understands through the pad of his thumb.

“Yeah,” he sniffs, “not so good, huh? That’s okay. You know how much I love you?”

And that peels your eyes open a fraction more. Only enough to sharpen the image of him, to find the dark pools of his eyes and the way the flame in them flickers as he says it.

“Love you so much,” he whispers. The tiny fire thaws the very bottom of your heart, even if only enough to keep the blood pushing heavily through your veins.

Your eyes close over again, and you take his shirt in two weak fists, pulling yourself into his body. Your head fits in the crook of his arm, burying into his side.

“You feel like leavin’ the house today?” he asks, voice sweet and earnest. “Just for a little while? We could go for a walk, could go for a drive. Just you ‘n me, sweet girl.”

You shake your head, your eyes prickling from the sincerity of his question. The guilt beginning to creep its way over your shoulders.

“No? You don’t wanna?” He lifts his head, staring out at the view from the window. “’s a nice day out. Cold, but it’s dry, ‘n the leaves are all orange and yellow, just like you like. Not even for a half hour?”

That same guilt – sneering, bullying – pokes a sharp-clawed finger in your ribs until you answer him. “Tired,” you mumble, screwing your eyes shut until you see the sudden, violent assault of stars in your vision.

“I know you’re tired, baby,” Joel says, stroking your back. “But it might do you a little good to get some fresh air. And you’d be with me, and we can come back home whenever you decide.”

Your fear and shame seem to cower beneath his words; melted by the soft timbre of his voice. They retreat inward, burrowing deep between the cage of your ribs, twisting and mangling around your pale bones.

“We can come back whenever?” you whisper, defying their threats.

“Whenever, darlin’. Promise.”

You surrender yourself, letting him take you in his arms and carry you over to your closet, where he sets you down gently. Keeping an arm around your waist, Joel waits patiently as you pick an outfit, and then helps drape it over your frame. You feel more statue than human – solid substance rather than plush flesh. Cold and brittle; the tender touch and lively glow drained from your skin the same way it drains so quickly of energy.

You’ve been fighting for years. Months and months and months of one step at a time and just keep going. Being told you’re more than what’s going on in your brain, being told not to let it become you. But there are days when you stand before the mirror, and you don’t recognize the figure staring back at you. The dark tunnels in place of eyes, the thin line of her lips.

There are days you can see the marks on your skin from how tight your anxiety and depression bind you; wrapping like ivy around your body until there’s nothing left of you to see through the dark green leaves. Just a haggard, shapeless thing. A skeleton too tired to carry the weight of yourself; a heart too weary to beat in time.

There once existed a time you had smiled, even laughed – you know it, you have the lines scored deep into your cheeks to prove it. Sometimes they ache when you think about it, like even they miss the feeling. Joel knows it, too – you sense it whenever he tells some dumb joke, sense that he’s searching your face for the slightest lift, the slightest dip of a dimple. And it fucking kills you, when you realize you have nothing sincere or true to offer him. No swollen cheeks, no flash of teeth. At best, a heavier exhale pushed from your nostrils.

It all feels so long ago, that lighter, fresher, happier you. It feels so far from your clutches. Like you’re drifting further and further from the surface, disappearing into the murky depths of your own mind.

The doctors, the articles, the fucking motivational posts on Instagram all say the same. Keep fighting it. Confront your illness. Prove it wrong. But you’re so fucking tired of fighting. Fighting it the entire drive to work, your heart threatening to burst; fighting it every conversation you have, your façade slowly cracking. Swallowing the panic like you swallow the medication; both of them sticking in your throat and refusing to go down.

There is no fighting it. There is no overcoming through confrontation. If you broke your leg, shattered every bone to dust, would they say the same? You gotta walk on it straight away to make it strong again. You don’t think so.

Joel doesn’t seem to think so, either. Joel, with a heart of molten gold, ready at every turn to let it pour onto your skin and paint it the color of sunlight when you can’t do it yourself. Joel, with his strong arms and wide reach, bundling you up over the top of all that foul ivy and snapping its thick stems with just his fingers.

Joel, who will sit at the edge of your bed and watch you take your meds; kiss your forehead and squeeze you tight when you show him your empty mouth. Joel, who will hold you in the dead of night and tell you stupid stories about his brother when they were kids, rubbing your back and chasing the dark ghosts from your mind.

Joel, who still sees something in you – whether he’s imagining it or not – and decides each day that it’s worth protecting. Worth saving. You’re worth saving, even on the days you don’t believe it yourself.

He drives for ten minutes, a little out of the suburbs and into a thicket of fire-colored leaves and solid, frozen ground. Fall sinks its teeth deep into the roots of the earth, drying up the bloom of summer and replacing it with something harder, something tougher. Nature is dying in the November breeze – the amber leaves painted the color of the trees’ blood as they fight a losing battle against the shifting of time. You feel yourself decaying with it: a drawn-out, painful surrender to the bleak days and dark nights.

Joel keeps his hand on your thigh the entire ride; you keep your fingers intertwined with his. The fluttering in your chest gets quicker and quicker, spreads its wings wider the further you feel from home. Your mouth dries up, forcing you to swallow after every third breath. But his hand stays there, planted on you like the root of an ancient tree: never shifting, no matter how strong the wind throws punches.

A shaky breath falls from your lips when he slows to a halt, the truck parked by a long wooden gate. He cuts the engine and turns to you, squeezing your leg lightly.

“We’re just gonna walk down there,” he nods out the window, “and back again. As slow as you like, ‘n we turn back when?”

“Whenever I want,” you whisper, nodding.

“Whenever you want, darlin’. Just say the word, alright? Sound good?”

You nod, blinking away the strain of tears across your vision. Your knee bounces, the metal buckles on your boots clinking in the footwell.

Joel rubs his thumb against your cheek. Lifts your free hand and places a delicate kiss to your knuckles. “I am so proud of you,” he mumbles against them, like scoring it into the bone.

You fill your cheeks, flattening your lips together, and he pulls on his door handle.

Five paces from the car, you realize how cold it is. The bitter air snaps at your cheeks, drags the salty tears from your eyes. Joel quickly fixes the collar of your jacket and pulls your scarf over your face.

“You bring gloves?” he asks.

Your head shakes in response.

“Here.” He fishes in the pockets of his tan jacket for a dark brown pair, flicking his fingers for you to hold your quivering hands out. He slips them on, all too big for you, and then knots his fingers through yours and leads you on down the sloping backroad.

Bordered by tall trees on either side, you feel secluded and hidden from the rest of the world. It fills you with equal parts comfort and terror: nobody else is here. No one can see your vacant eyes, the wet stain of fallen tears on your cheeks. Not the vice grip you have on your boyfriend or the weak quiver of your voice.

And at the same time: nobody else is here. No people, no sign of life. Just an isolated track, the looming trees overhead, the squelch of muck and the bite of fall for company.

Joel matches your pace, strolling along by your side with your arm through his and his hand resting on top of yours. He catches your glances over your shoulder, sees the jittery movements of your head as you scan the scene around you, and pats the back of your hand tenderly.

“Take a deep breath for me.”

You fill your lungs with a chilly gulp of air, pushing it back out again as steadily as you can.

“And again.”

You repeat the exercise, your chest swelling against your buttoned up coat.

“You’re doin’ great,” he says, looking down at you. “You feelin’ okay?”

“I’m – Yeah, I’m just…” you twist back to search for the wooden gate, “…can’t see the truck anymore.”

“’s right there, promise ya. You wanna go back?”

He pauses, and your boots scuff to a halt on the stony terrain. You chew the inside of your cheek, eyebrows arching to release more tears from between your lashes. “No,” you breathe, “I wanna try to go further.”

“Then let’s try to go further. Yeah?”

You nod, setting off when you realize he’s waiting for you to take the lead.

The fields on either side of you are strung with a thick blanket of mist from one end to the other, masking the trees at the opposite side and obscuring the line between earth and sky. Your body close to Joel’s, your heartbeat attempting to match the steady pace of his, you feel safe, protected. The promise that you can call it a day whenever your body begins to weigh too much, whenever your lungs begin to falter.

Somewhere between the thinning of the hedgerows, another slanted, shabby gate materializes. Its crisscross panels and worn wooden posts separating you from the first company in your twenty-minute walk.

“Joel,” you call, loosening your grip on his arm and wandering over to the long, dewy grass towards a chestnut horse, a sliver of white fur diving deep between her eyes.

She slowly thumps over, huge hooves sinking deep into the soft dirt. Her long tail swishing, navy rug wrapped around her midriff. She docks at the gate, puffing a heavy breath – hot, thick clouds shooting from each nostril.

“Hi,” you say quietly, lifting a floppy-gloved hand for her to sniff. “Joel?” you say again, glancing down at her swollen belly, the low droop of the rug. “I think she might be pregnant.”

She tosses her head up, ears flicking, and nuzzles into the soft material of Joel’s glove. You feel her wrinkled muzzle, the strong, solid bridge of her nose. She blinks slowly; huge, deep brown eyes twinkling in the late-morning light, and you swear she’s trying to communicate something to you.

“Hey, girl,” Joel says, running a careful hand down her mane.

The horse sighs serenely, eyes flitting between the two of you. Her nostrils flare gently, light brown lashes fluttering. You tilt your head, stroking her and letting her teeth graze the sleeve of your jacket. Her bulky head turns to-and-fro, glancing up and down the trail you’re stood on, contently waiting for the passage of time. Enjoying her view from the misty field before it all changes again.

Unexpected and unwelcome, the absence of compression in your chest suddenly makes itself known. Dread spills into your lungs, thick like tar. You turn on your heel and cast Joel one fleeting glance.

He catches it, and without missing a beat, asks, “You ready to go?”

“Yeah,” you say. “Is that okay?”

“’s more ‘n okay, baby. You did so good today. Didn’t she?” he asks the horse, who huffs another hot breath. Joel tosses a thumb towards her. “See?”

You step back over to the animal, now preparing to wander back on home, and give her one last tender stroke. She blinks twice, tosses her head a final time, and her broad body turns, thudding off back up the slope.

As he links your arms again, Joel blinks down at you, the corners of his mouth slowly lifting.

“What?” you ask, shyly.

“Look at you,” he says, nudging your shoulder with a glint in his eye. “You’re smilin’.”

Autumn flashes by as Joel drives you home – ginger and bronze and honey and cinnamon blurring into one as you pass them by. You settle back against the headrest, moving with the sway of the truck, your tired fingers tracing blind shapes on Joel’s palm.

Nature is burning. Perhaps dying is too harsh a term. Burning in preparation for the winter, when it will lay dormant and restful. Quiet, save for the crunch of snow beneath your feet. Bland, save for the sparkle of frost on your windowpanes. The droplets of beauty laced through, the little reminders that not all has been lost.

I am burning right now, the earth says, but wait until you see what I can become.

The days will turn to night. The sun will tear the sky to tatters, set the whole thing fucking ablaze, go down in a battle stained in red and orange and deep, dark blue – and she will still return, spilling golden all over the horizon. She always does.

The clouds will cover overhead, dampening the color on earth. The blues will fade to gray, the yellows will undoubtedly pale. And then the sky will clear, when it is ready; the clouds will break in two to let a ribbon of cerulean burst through.

The leaves will fall to the ground and feed the soil; new ones will sprout from buds left in their wake. The ground will thaw, will soften again in time to welcome the push of daisies and burst of heather. The horse will foal, the birds will sing to their babies, the buzz of insects will irritate your ears; the rivers will gush and the trees will sway and you will be okay again.

You will be okay again.

#joel miller #joel miller fic #joel miller x reader #joel miller au #joel miller fluff #the last of us #tlou #tw mental illness #tw depression #tw anxiety

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halsteadlover · 8 months

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𝐅𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐒𝐭𝐞𝐩𝐬

*Gif not mine credits to the owner*

• Paired: Spencer Reid x Female!Reader.

• Requested: no.

• Summary: your baby boy takes his first steps leaving Spencer a mumbling mess.

• Warnings: none, just fluff.

• Word count: 1591.

• A/N: just a quick Spencer fic since I realized I’m only writing for Jay once again (what can I say he’ll always be my first love). I hope you’ll like it, y’all know I’m a sucker for dad’s fics 😭. Please comment, reblog and like if you want. Thank you so much for all your support I love you all so much, my inbox and dms are always open if you want to talk ❤��

“Spencer! Baby! Oh my God come here now!“.

Your voice made Spencer jump on his chair. He was writing a work report he didn’t manage to finish that day and for which Hotch would’ve his head if he didn’t turn it back by the next day.

Spencer's heart lost a beat and fear swept over him as his mind began to project every worst-case scenario possible.

He got up from his study desk, dropping his pen carelessly to the floor, and literally ran to the living room where he knew you and your baby were.

“Baby! What happened?! Are you all right? Is Noah okay?” He asked with concern and you instantly felt guilty for worrying him like that.

You were sitting on the floor, legs crossed while Noah was standing next to you and you were holding him by his little hands. He was babbling something nonsensical and began to fidget when he turned and saw his father, a huge smile on his face.

“Sorry love, everything’s okay. I didn't mean to scare you,” you giggled as you saw Spencer visibly relax and heave a sigh of relief.

“You gave me a fucking heart attack I thought something had happened,” he breathed out with a hand on his chest as he could feel his heart still pounding.

How long had he become so jumpy? He didn't know, he just knew that since he had become a father every little change and every little thing made him jump on the spot, making him tremendously worried about his child. God, that little being was making him lose years of life with each passing day.

“Don't ever do that again please,” Spencer admonished you as he approached you sternly but his expression immediately softened as his eyes rested on Noah who kept fidgeting wanting nothing more than to go to his father. “What have you been up to little one? You like to scare your dada huh? You are so lucky you and your mom are adorable, I hope both of you know that”.

You let go of his little hands but still being close to him as you proudly watched Noah hold himself up. His little legs trembled slightly as he continued to babble something.

“Oh god...” Spencer murmured almost imperceptibly in shock. Was it really going to happen? In that instant he realized why you had called him and he almost had a heart attack again.

“Yes baby! Come to dada, come here, I know you can do it,” he continued to encourage him, approaching him and kneeling down so he could immediately catch him if he fell. He stretched his arms toward his baby, a huge smile on his lips as he invited Noah to take his first steps.

You went to get your phone at the speed of light, wanting to capture that precious moment in a video so you could keep it with you forever.

Noah brought one leg forward and the other with instability, taking his first step and making his parents jump for joy.

The living room filled with the sounds of little squeals of excitement and clapping hands as you both continued to encourage your son to continue taking baby steps.

Spencer never felt such joy before, maybe he had a similar feeling the day he married you but seeing his baby walk, taking his first steps towards him, damn it, that feeling was something indescribable, something he’d never forget.

“Yeah buddy! You're so good, you're doing great my love. Come to your dada! I’m right here… “ Spencer continued to say while taking small steps backwards while Noah instead took the same number towards him.

His eyes didn't leave his child even for a second, almost forgetting you were there next to them while filming the whole scene with your cell phone. He analyzed every movement that little ray of sunshine was making, the way he was so focused, the way his walk was unsteady and rickety, the way he looked at him with a smile on his little face as he let slip some little frustrated screams when he never seemed to be able to reach his father. He wanted to imprint all these little details in his memory and never before did he thank whoever was up there for his eidetic memory.

Noah eventually stopped in his tracks and Spencer caught him before he even hit the floor, standing up and holding him close.

“Yes! You did it buddy!” Spencer exclaimed in joy as he lifted little Noah into the air who continued to giggle and drool while he waved his little arms. He showered kisses on his plump little cheeks, not being able to contain his joy. “I'm so proud of you little one, I love you so much.”

You were a complete mess as you looked at Spencer and the way he held his baby with so much love and pride, you could see it in his face, the way he looked at him. That man loved his son more than any other person in the world and then more than ever you couldn't help but think you couldn't have chosen a better father for your child.

Spencer gently caressed Noah's head, cradling him in his arms as his emotions overwhelmed him.

He had never been good at controlling them and keeping them at bay was harder than ever. He couldn't believe how quickly time was passing, how was it possible his son was already walking?

It seemed like yesterday that he held him as soon as he was born.

“Spence…” you called him when you saw the way Spencer had sheltered his face on Noah's small shoulders, as if to hide himself. You placed a hand on your husband's shoulder, immediately noticing he was crying.

“Take him,” he whispered and you picked Noah up as Spencer went to sit on the couch, hands on his face and elbows resting on his knees as he sobbed uncontrollably.

“Oh baby you'll make me cry too.”

As if you weren’t already a fountain of tears.

You hugged your baby too, crying with joy all the tears you had in your body while he unaware played with your hair.

“I love you so much my little angel,” you whispered, giving him a kiss on the cheek, thanking God for giving you such a beautiful gift.

You turned your head towards Spencer, noticing how he was sobbing and when he raised his head and you looked at each other, you both burst into a loud laughter, aware of how disastrous each other looked.

You sat next to him and he wasted no time in wrapping a hug around your shoulders. He pulled you towards him and left a kiss on your head, while tears continued to run down his cheeks, his eyes on Noah who just didn't seem to stay still.

“I… Damn… I can’t do this…” he cried, bringing his hands to his face after leaning against the back of the sofa and drying his tears.

How could anyone be so fucking happy?

He had never felt anything like this, he didn't know how to react and he hated not knowing how he felt.

He was afraid. Afraid it’d be too good to be true.

What had he done to deserve all this? What had he done to have the family he had always dreamed of?

Images and memories kept playing in his mind. From the moment you told him you were pregnant, from the joy and fear of having to be a father, from when you found out you were expecting a boy to the moment he felt him kicking for the first time in your womb. He remembered watching your belly grow for nine months until he finally held his son in his arms for the first time and now seeing him take his first steps.

He felt so incredibly grateful, so damn lucky.

You caressed his arm, trying to comfort him even though you were crying even more than him.

He tried to compose himself but all he had to do was pick up his baby again to let down more tears of joy, meanwhile laughing with you. It was so surreal.

He wrapped his other arm around your shoulders and pulled you back to him, letting you rest your head on his chest as you looked at Noah standing on his father's thighs.

“I love you so much baby, thank you for giving me the best gift I could ever ask for,” he whispered after leaving a sweet kiss on your forehead making your heart do a somersault in your chest. Even though years had passed, you never got tired of hearing him say it.

You lifted your head and pressed your lips to his in a chaste kiss as butterflies roamed freely across your stomach. “I love you so much Spence.”

You burst out laughing when Noah grabbed a lock of Spencer's hair and started pulling it, making the grown man let out a whine.

“Jesus christ how can they be so small but so strong?” Spencer complained as he tried to loosen his baby’s grip on his hair. The scene was comical, you didn't know if the way Noah pulled Spencer’s hair made you laugh more or your husband's face still streaked with tears and his eyes still red.

But he didn't care, even though Noah was hurting him quite a bit, he couldn't stop smiling, thinking he wouldn't change this for anything else in the world.

General tag list: @hngbrooks, @alexxavicry, @halstead-severide-fan, @mrspeacem1nusone, @allivzs, @omniaimy, @cursedashes

Spencer Reid tag list: @blorp-bee, @s1lverhand, @novabckly

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ofmymuses · 6 months

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heads up! below the cut is long and personal (probably oversharing too KSDFJH)—

hi friends!! i'm in the mood to word vomit about the past few months so, here goes nothing~ if you have any comments or questions or anything like that, both my dms and inbox are open ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ ♡

so, i've been in a transitional "era"(?) for the past few months as i try to navigate a whoooole lot of change - too much change almost. i won't get super into it rn but one of the changes is that i've recently made the decision to stop my antidepressants.. and let me tell you.......... it's been an experience; like i said above, i'm trying to navigate all of these new thoughts and feelings since coming off

obviously i've noticed a big change in myself - mostly with how i think and how i feel emotions. i can't afford therapy right now so i've been talking to my best friends and my fiancé instead and we all agreed that i have bpd (they're diagnosed with bpd so i very much trust their opinions). despite this, i'm still going to get professionally diagnosed once i save enough money to do so. regardless of what it is, i've known that my brain's wiring is different for some time now so i can't say i'll be very surprised

i don't think i ever really showed symptoms of bpd before because i was medicated, you know? but now that i'm off of it, my true self is shining more. it's been interesting learning new things about myself. it's honestly really cool learning things about myself that i didn't know before. but i (desperately) need to learn how to manage all of these new experiences because i've never dealt with them before. i'd been on meds for....... god. a very long time. if anyone has any recommendations for videos or books or posts about managing bpd or anything along those lines, i would appreciate them being sent my way!! i probably won't publicly answer them so that i can save them so thank you in advance to anyone who sends resources my way ♡♡

something i also wanted to quickly note is my fiancé.. so, as you may know, i broke up with my long-term boyfriend back in the summertime and shortly after that, i met the literal light of my life. we met at school but how we "met" was just us looking at each other across the room and smiling. i eventually wrote him a little note that i liked his art and when i went to the washroom, he slipped one back saying that he really likes my smile and the rest is history 🥺 we just recently moved in together into the cutest little apartment we went to the mall not long ago and we were looking at one of the merchandiser's jewelry and he jokingly said something along the lines of: "i would ask you to marry me with one of these $10 rings, i don't care" and i said back "and i would say yes" so he told me to pick one out and i picked up the first one that caught my eye (it resembles a tiara with a blue heart in the middle + white crystals going across).. at this point, the cashier was almost done ringing up his order so i had to pick quickly and it turned out that the one that had caught my eye fit perfectly on my ring finger. so i took that as the biggest sign of approval and went with that one. later that night, i got him to help me adjust it and as he was giving it back, i told him to ask before giving it back (mostly as a joke) so he got on one knee and "proposed" before sliding it on my finger. technically, it was a proposal and i did accept but we're seeing it as more of a promise ring until he can get an actual ring. but i still like to call him my fiancé and he calls me his girl + his wife and i'm just :'')) very happy

sooooooooooooooo, yeah! that's pretty much all i wanted to dump DFGKHGJ this year has been the biggest transition of my life but i finally feel like i'm where i'm supposed to be. i don't know if this is going to make any sense but the person i created myself to be in order to fit in growing up doesn't fit the environment i feel i'm supposed to be in so unlearning everything and letting my authentic self come out has been challenging but so rewarding. it has made me a bit sad that a few of my family members have been worried about me because imo, there's nothing to worry about. but anyway

i feel like i could go on and on about the shit that's been going on but one or two topics is enough for now. so thank you for reading my brain dump! i hope you have a lovely rest of the weekend 🥰

(also i didn't proofread this so please ignore any mistakes)

#just dumping thoughts ngl. this is the first time i can use my pc in a few weeks SDFKJH #delete later #noninspo

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forlix · 5 months

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hiii, it’s me again, 🪷 anonnie

I’m so glad you liked the song! I love giving song recs, and music and lit are so intertwined in my brain so I’m thinking of the two together all the time.

now… onto ‘empty my mind’… spoilers below:

SO GOOD 😭🫠

idek what this trope is called but I love when one characters is soo devoted and desperate to do anything for their lover. like, just give everything up completely and do anything for them. and I love it even more when the target of their affection is immediately aware of this dynamic and feels so protective instead of, like, taking advantage of it? which for sure you can see jisung assumes will eventually happen, and he feels like he deserves to be used and dropped. but reader treats him so well like ‘no, you’re not a bad person you’re literally just a human existing. you’re doing your best baby’ like UGH! SO GOOD!

and then they actually talk at the end and get that closure? like jisung feels safe enough to open up and reader understands him completely. and this silent reassurance that is fully being vocalized really convinces jisung that he does deserve to be loved. and like, he believes he’s being fixed too which is so much development. going from ‘I’ll do whatever you want, I feel like nothing so I’ll be thankful for anything you give me’ to ‘I’ll do whatever you want, because you make me feel like something’. also there is so much care put into the metaphor of the ghosts that manifest in his nightmares representing his mental health that I can’t get into it because I will literally CRY! how reader handles his mental state so tenderly just wrecks me 💗

also, love the scenes with felix and the other members. especially when jisung and reader leave the study group. I imagined felix thinking ‘yes, she can fix him’ the whole time he’s trying to bring them together. and I loved the smut, car sex is always sexy. not to mention how intent jisung is on convincing reader that he’s not gonna leave, and then later during the storm she assures him that she wants him to stay. like YES HE NEEDS TO KNOW THAT YOU WANT HIM FOR MORE THAN JUST SEX

sorry for the short essay but I really wanted to say it all. I think next time I will just dm you but I’m very shy about interacting with people 👉🏻👈🏻 anywayyy, byye, take care 🫶🏻

hello my light, my love, my lotus anon, pls accept my apology for replying to this so late i wanted to store it in my inbox until it finally sank in that it's REAL and you're real bc what the fuck. i can't believe u took the time to analyze "empty my mind" so deeply and so richly i wept reading this the first time and i'm weeping AGAIN typing this out. thank you, thank you, thank you

re: the connections between music and literature, you're SO real for that. for most of my writings (except for the drabbles), i include lil playlists in the description so y'all can listen to the songs i derived inspiration from while writing :') i would be so curious to know your thoughts on the ones i chose for "empty my mind"! or if u made any associations yourself 🎤 lmk my lyrical genius

and i seriously fell over myself reading your interpretation of their relationship because that's EXACTLY what i was going for, like, for real, you hit every single point and articulated it so much better than i could if i tried. i loved all of what you said, but especially the part where the reader embraces rather than takes advantage of him. i like to think he got the sense he could trust her from the moment they met, so he very cautiously continued to give himself to her bit by bit as they grew closer even though he was deathly afraid of doing so. and it was all worth it in the end bc she's wonderful for him and wonderful in general (can u tell i love my mcs)

and it's so interesting that you used the word "fixed." i had to tread carefully around their dynamic, in part because i didn't want it to seem like she was hoping to change anything about him (or yk those memes that are like "i can fix him" and it's about the most toxic person in the world? yeah that was not her thought process). the core of their love, the reason why they work, is because she doesn't see anything that has to be changed in the first place. he is fucking perfect to her as he comes. so i love the way you described it: it's him who wants to change, not for her but because of her, thanks to her, because she reminds him that he can.

taking an intermission to fangirl over you bc

going from ‘I’ll do whatever you want, I feel like nothing so I’ll be thankful for anything you give me’ to ‘I’ll do whatever you want, because you make me feel like something’

the way you PHRASED THIS HOLY FUCK. A BILLION TIMES YES. you picked up on their very essence and i'm pressing consensual kisses to your mind because you read them (and me) like an open book

ALSO!! ABOUT FELIX OMG. you're so right, ofc our wonderful, emotional, observant lix can see the clouds perpetually hanging over ji's head and knows mc will be able to help him scatter them. my fav matchmaker

NEVER, EVER apologize for sending me an essay my star. you genuinely have no idea how happy your ask made me like it's not an exaggeration to say my heart is floating within me rn. that you took apart my fic so tenderly and so perceptively not only enforced my love for writing as a whole but strengthened it manifold. i don't even have the words to thank you as vehemently as i want to but just know i'll be safekeeping your words for a very long time to come 🤍

i treasure you so fucking much. THANK YOU.

#also yes feel free to dm me any time! asks are okay too! whatever you're comfiest with baby #i teared up i love you #*inbox #🪷 anon

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missmeinyourbones · 2 years

Note

so instead of addressing the fact that you misused aave as a non black person, you just delete the tag and pretend like nothing happened? I really want to be nice about it because you are one of my favorite writers on here, but not addressing something you did that is offensive to one’s culture only makes you look bad. A simple “I apologize” or “I didn’t know and I won’t make that mistake again” would have sufficed. I’m not saying you can’t say slay or use aave. I’m saying to at least study the history behind it and learn from other AA’s on how to use it. If a person of color has told you that something you did is offensive to their culture, you owm up to it and apologize; that’s literally it. I apologize if this seems like I’m coming at you in a really mean and rude way, but it honestly hurts to see that someone who’s writings I enjoy, probably does not care about black people like they claim to.

hello, a message below the cut!

hi anon, i hope you are doing alright. i totally understand where you are coming from and right off the bat would like to apologize for overstepping and saying something i shouldn't have. for those of you who don't know what this is regarding, i used a tag that said something along the lines of "new theme slay" when talking w/ a mutual of mine.

it is never my intent to many anyone feel upset in any way, let alone make anyone of a minority group feel discriminated against in any shape or form, as it is something i as a white person have the privilege of not experiencing in my life.

yes i deleted the tag from the post because i saw your message, read it, understood where you and others might be coming from, and deleted it. truthfully, i thought about posting an indirect message about it...something along the lines of "to the anon who asked about my 'slay' tag, i deleted it, as it was not my intent to use it in a way that offended anyone, sorry for the mistake/misunderstanding!" but i ultimately decided against it, as i truthfully thought complimenting a mutual in a tag saying slay wasn't a huge deal. but yes, i saw your comment and deleted it, and seeing how you interpreted this in a disrespectful light, i do apologize.

in absolutely no way did i consciously mean to disrespect, dismiss, or belittle your feelings. again, i apologize, i am genuinely very sorry for the hurt the miscommunication caused. i am assuming you're the same anon who has addressed me about this before (and if youre not, even more of a reason for me to address the mistake) but i genuinely thank you for correcting me/holding me accountable.

however, i would like to end this by saying: please do not ever associate me with any sort of purposeful or conscious oppressive outlook or discriminatory perspective. i am a person who makes mistakes and should own up to them like everyone else. with that being said, i would never purposefully imply that i "do not care about black people like i claim to" and if thats something you truly believe i support/endorse, then please unfollow me. i am learning but i am also a person, and will not tolerate any form of hate against my personal character, especially about very serious allegations that are the opposite of the truth on a blog that is supposed to be a fun and safe place for all kinds of people.

i am sorry for my words, it was never my intent to hurt or offend anyone. if any of my black or poc followers would like to talk with me or further educate me on continuing to better myself and learn as an ally, my dms and inbox are always open for your words.

#thank you for reading!

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woniehugs · 3 years

Note

hii there :) can i req reaction where the boys accidentally pinned their crush to the ground? like they fell on top of them hahaha hope ure doing well :)💓

your wish is granted, anon. ♡

— ✧ ENHYPEN HEADCANONS! ✧ —

- ͙۪۪̥˚┊❛ enhypen reaction! -> pinning their crush to the ground ❜┊˚ ͙۪۪̥◌

🖇·˚ ༘ ┊͙ hey lovelys! this request has been in my inbox for a while now and i was supposed to write this like way long ago but didn’t have time even though i could write something short for this. i also didn’t really feel like it so now that i’ve gained the motivation, i’m happy to say, here is your request, anon. one last thing, this is more of like them just crashing to you and falling on the ground but you can also take it as how they would react if they had a crush on you :) and to the anon once again, thank you so much for requesting and for being patient! <3

—✧ pairing: enhypen member x member’s crush! reader

—✧ genre: lots and lots of fluff

—✧ words: 2,028

—✧ tagging: @youreverydayzebra @witheeseung @w3bqrl (permanent taglist is currently open, send a dm if you want to be added!)

—✧ a/n: this does not actually portray the boys in real life. this is a work of fiction so these are just my thoughts and opinions on how they would react, basing from their personalities but that doesn’t mean they’re necessarily true. don’t take any of this seriously and just take it to heart, thank you <3

══════*.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.*══════

˗ˏˋ lee heeseung ´ˎ˗

➮ his doe eyes would be as big as saucers when he notices how close the distance between both of your faces are.

➮ but it would take him like 5 seconds to realize this and just spends that time duration to stare at your face before eventually standing up in a blink of an eye.

➮ he offered you his hand for you to take and stand up in which you gladly took, and you were taken back when he suddenly apologized.

➮ “i’m so so sorry, y.n. i-i didn’t mean for that to happen. i was in a hurry and you were in the way, i wasn’t looking and i didn’t want to be a bother but then that happened and i’ve never been that close with a girl befo-“

➮ his apology was cut off by a giggle that had slipped from your lips and his eyes widen again, in fear that he had made you uncomfortable with his words.

➮ that fear was gone just as it had passed when he sees the way your face light up when you laughed. he didn’t realize he was staring for too long until you stopped, making him quickly avert your gaze.

➮ after you told him that he didn’t need to apologize, you excused yourself out of the scenario, feeling a bit embarrassed about what happened.

➮ heeseung was still left stunned by the scenario, mentally scolding himself not to let that happen again and watch where he was going next time.

➮ poor boy was scared that he might’ve accidentally scarred you even though he didn’t :((

✦

˗ˏˋ park jongseong ´ˎ˗

➮ his perfume was the first thing you could point out with your senses before realizing that this man was literally right on top of you.

➮ he would take a few seconds to lift himself off of you and look up through his lashes to see who he had accidentally ‘bumped’ into.

➮ seeing that it’s you, he would let out a sound you didn’t even know he can make and immediately push himself off of you. 😭

➮ when he realizes you had witnessed his reaction, his face turns a light shade of pink, shaking his head and pretending he did not just act like that in front of you, and would then act all tough because that’s what almost everyone perceives him as.

➮ jay’s a gentleman so he would stand up and offer you a hand, saying “sorry for running into you, y/n.” with an apologetic smile on his face.

➮ once you took his hand in yours, you swore you felt him shift a little but you didn’t mind, lifting yourself off the ground and brushing out any dirt that got on you and your clothes.

➮ of course, you told him that it was okay and you didn’t get hurt anywhere maybe except for the fact that his perfume was strong when it passed through your nostrils, that must’ve hurt but no one can deny he smelled good.

➮ “do you want me to buy you a new pair of clothes as an apology?”

➮ you raise an eyebrow at this but you’d be lying if you said you didn’t want to take up on his offer.

✦

˗ˏˋ shim jaeyun ´ˎ˗

➮ would stutter out so many apologies as soon as he crashes into you and the both of you are on the ground, you not being able to mutter out a word because of the shock.

➮ “i’m sorry! i’m sorry, i wasn’t looking! i didn’t mean to-“

➮ “j-jake! i can’t breathe, lift yourself off of me first!”

➮ he would burst into a fit of giggles at your words *sobbing* and hoist himself above you with both of his hands, pinning you under him.

➮ the two of you get lost in each others’ eyes for a moment, the distance not even a measurement apart.

➮ jake’s cheeks start to turn pink at your closeness and so does yours, you notice a mischievous smile form on his face.

➮ “so you’re not going to tell me to get away? am i this handsome up this close, y/n?”

➮ you try utter out a response but to no avail, no words were forming and you feel embarassed when you couldn’t think of a quick comeback to his question.

➮ he laughs at your reaction and would teasingly taunt you by inching even closer that made you shriek in his face resulting to him finally getting himself off of you.

➮ you stand up and let out a laugh when you see him still on the ground, genuinely shock at whatever just happened.

➮ “you scream like a madwoman! you could’ve just told me to get off, jeez.”

➮ neither of you brought up the scenario again, brushing it off and convincing yourselves that it was gonna happen at some point, knowing how clumsy the both of you can get.

✦

˗ˏˋ park sunghoon ´ˎ˗

➮ he would not think twice to get up on his feet when he sees your shocked face in a close distance at what just happened though you were kinda disappointed because you wanted to admire his handsome face more.

➮ “i wasn’t looking, i’m sorry. did i make you uncomfortable, y/n?”

➮ like any other gentleman, he offers his hand for you take to help you stand up. of course, you took it. like who isn’t gonna take a chance to hold sunghoon’s hand?

➮ “n-no, i’m okay. sorry about that as well, it’s no biggie.” you stutter in reply because sunghoon is indeed the prettiest boy, his visuals are out of this world istg.

➮ sunghoon grows shy and suddenly runs a hand through his hair to try to get rid of the awkwardness he was feeling and you found it attractive obviously.

➮ you try to sneak in a few glances here and there just to admire his handsome looks in which sunghoon caught onto every single time you did.

➮ and when you sneak in a stare one last time, you see him looking back at you and you immediately look away.

➮ now it’s just you two standing there awkwardly ffs.

➮ the two of you excused yourselves, eager to escape from the embarassment and just run away lmao.

➮ as for sunghoon, he can’t seem to get the scenario that happened out of his mind, his neck can be seen with a few spots of red, a reaction to what had just happened moments ago. ;)

✦

˗ˏˋ kim sunoo ´ˎ˗

➮ giggles when he sees you so close to him and flashes you a big smile on his face 😭😭😭

➮ “y/n, you look weird this close.” i just know he’ll say something like that and then just giggle once again.

➮ you’d act like you were mad at him but you can’t bring yourself to do so because he’s just so cute and precious.

➮ his cheeks flush when he realizes the current situation the both of you were in, you caught onto this and ask him if he’s ‘feeling alright’.

➮ he backs away a little bit and nods shyly, lifting his figure off of you and stands up. he doesn’t want you to see right through him, just how much of an effect you had on him.

➮ you take his hand that he offered for you to take as he lifts you from the cold tiles.

➮ “are you okay? i didn’t crash into you that hard, right?”

➮ nodding, you send him a reassuring smile to tell you that you were really alright.

➮ would rub the back of his neck and smile back at you AAAHGFHSJAKSNDB

➮ once the embarassment is out, he would go back to being his fun and smiley self and hug you, showering you with his love and being genuinely sorry that happened.

➮ you’d be confused but grateful nonetheless that he was no longer worried but still caring for you.

➮ “mint choco ice cream seems like the best solution right now. i’ll buy you some, hm? my treat! you don’t need to worry at all!”

➮ his enthusiastic self couldn’t let you say no so you went along even if you weren’t that big of a fan for mint choco.

➮ at times, sunoo would accidentally recall this incident and smile at the thought. he’ll then pinch himself for feeling giddy over this. cute

✦

˗ˏˋ yang jungwon ´ˎ˗

➮ shy babie 🥺 he would be quick to ask if you’re alright despite him feeling awkward. the distance between the two of you does not help with his fast beating heart.

➮ “are you hurt? did i hit you somewhere? i’m sorry, y/n, it was my mistake.”

➮ “jungwon, it’s alright. i’m okay. not hurting anywhere, though my back’s kind of in pain but overall, i’m fine.”

➮ you can see his dimples poking out from his cheeks, he was trying hard to surpress a smile (pls he’s so cute) to ease out the tension a bit.

➮ he takes a few seconds to look at your face before standing up and puts out his hand for you take.

➮ “are you sure? you don’t need to go to the nurse’s office?”

➮ it takes a while for you to convince him that you were completely fine. it’s okay though, you could understand that he was genuinely worried :’’’)

➮ after a moment of silence, you notice him blushing.

➮ “your face is all pink. are you sure you’re not the one who needs to go to the nurse’s office?”

➮ jungwon’s eyes widen and tries to laugh your words off, denying what you said and saying that the room was just hot.

➮ the feeling of embarassment consumed him whole once he realized he had you pinned on the ground moments ago okay, he’s just shy. 😭

➮ he asks once again if you’re really okay and you reassure him one last time that you really are.

➮ seems like the type to offer you to pin him to the ground as well as payback or something that you can do to him so that he’d feel better that you two went through that pretty awkward situation.

➮ it ends up with you asking him to buy you food and he obliges because wonie’s soft for you <3

✦

˗ˏˋ nishimura riki ´ˎ˗

➮ one thing for sure, i know he’d laugh so hard once the both of you are on the ground but that’s because he hasn’t seen that it was you yet.

➮ as soon as he realizes that it’s none other than his beloved crush, his eyes would widen and push himself off of you, just like jay.

➮ grows shy all of a sudden and you notice this right away, asking him if he’s alright even though he was supposed to be the one asking you that.

➮ he answers right away that he’s fine and tries to hide the fact that he’s flustered because of what happened. the image of your face underneath him earlier not leaving his mind because he’s whipped.

➮ you snap him out of his daze and he rushes to helping you stand up because he’s ashamed he zoned out for a bit and didn’t even try to help you afterwards.

➮ apologizes 927392 times only for you to tell him that it’s alright and it’s nothing to worry about.

➮ “i’m literally so much taller than you, are you sure i didn’t hit you anywhere where it could’ve hurt?”

➮ his way of showing his concern actually surprised you because he’s not usually like that. he’s always laughing everything off and making jokes so niki doing something like this, especially towards you of all people, never crossed your mind.

➮ you were sure if it were any other person like one of his friends, he would laugh this off. since it was you, ofc he cared :((

➮ after a while, he’d excuse himself first before you could and try to act like he wasn’t trying to run away from you but in reality, he really was because he felt embarassed.

➮ would be the type to share to his friends about what happened and rant to them on how much of a mess he was and that he should’ve been more careful.

➮ the next time he sees you, he’ll act like nothing happened and continue to tease you like he always does to hide the fact that he liked you.

══════*.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.*══════

#enhypen #enhypennetwork #enhypen fluff #enhypen scenarios #enhypen x reader #enhypen imagines #enhypen reaction #enhypen soft hours #yang jungwon #lee heeseung #park jongseong #sim jaeyun #park sunghoon #kim sunoo #nishimura riki

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wildlyminiaturesandwich · 4 years

Text

Why I left the EA Game Changer Program

Judging by the state of my inbox, a lot of you want to know what happened that lead to me leaving the Game Changer program and I was gonna write up a MASSIVE text post about it — I still might one day — but honestly... I’m not sure if I could be bothered right now. A lot of things happened, big things and small things, public things and things that took place in the Discord and DMs; all of it absolute bullshit but none of it is anything I want to continue to deal with, which is why I left.

This post still turned out to be quite long so I’m gonna put it under a cut, but if you’re expecting ALL the juicy details, this isn’t it. This is a couple of the major issues but it’s just the tip of the iceberg.

So let me just say, most of the issues can be boiled down to how the program was managed. The program has been slowly declining since SimGuruDrake left and the Community Manager role has kept changing. Say what you want about Drake and her attitude but she was damn good at her job and none of the crap that certain “high value” Game Changers have gotten away with in the past few years would have ever happened on her watch. But I can honestly say the newest Community Manager has been the worst so far.

(I mean, it’s been 5 days since I told him I was leaving the program and he hasn’t replied. I doubt he ever will. I am not surprised, I’m not even disappointed; I’m just annoyed that I was right because this isn’t the first time he’s ignored DMs and I wasn’t expecting any different this time)

Need some examples? We were told in no uncertain terms by the CM that only “High Value” creators (meaning a select group of Youtubers) would ever be given opportunities such as paid sponsorships, event invites and the like because they alone were worth the investment. He also told us that the Game Changer program has “nothing to do with the community”, which is a stark contrast to what most of us were told by the previous CMs and the reason some of us joined the program. And every single time myself and a few other Simblr Game Changers bought up concerns in the Discord about certain things (eg. racism within the program, favouritism, “high value” Game Changers bullying smaller ones, Game Changers acting inappropriately or taking advantage of their titles/power, the insane amount of stress put on us to produce content within such a tight timeframe for early access) we were either told “this isn’t the place to discuss this”, told to “calm down” when we were speaking politely, told to shut up and warned that if we kept going we’d be punished, or just flat out ignored and spoken over.

There were even several occasions where a certain group of GCs (some of whom were mods in the Discord) would provoke one particular Simblr because they knew she would only put up with so much before she would get angry and they hoped she would eventually say something to get herself kicked out. But every single time this happened, the Simblr was the one who was warned that if she kept being “aggressive” she’d be removed from the program. It’s gotten so bad that there are people who are actually scared to speak at all in the Discord because they’re afraid they’ll be removed from the program for having a difference of opinion or not agreeing with the “High Value” people. Honestly, if people knew even half of what was said within that Discord, if they knew how some of their faves behaved behind “closed doors”, they’d be even more disappoint than I am.

So, in conclusion, if you’re a Simblr and you are thinking about joining the program next time applications are open (if they ever are)... Don’t. They don’t care about us, they don’t view us as equals within the community even though Simblrs provide 90% of the CC and mods they use in their games; they never have and they never will. Simblrs have been part of the program for over 3 years and they still don’t even have a way for us to submit our early access content to EA (we have to DM it to the CM who no doubt just ignores it) or accurately measure our ROI, even though several of us have given the CM literal novels worth of information on how it could be done. The only way Simblr GCs have ever been acknowledged was if they started a Youtube channel or collaborated with one of the “high value” creators. Ever seen a single Simblr at an EA event, get a paid sponsorship or even simply get mentioned in a Sims official Twitter tweet? No. Why? They. Don’t. Care. About. Us.

Honestly, if I knew back then what I know now, I never would have applied for the program in the first place. I could have saved myself years of stress, anxiety, sleepless nights, and tears.

But, if I keep going this is gonna turn into even more of a rant than it already has and that’s not what I want. I just want to wake up every morning not dreading what nonsense is happening in that Discord and how much trouble I’m going to get into for speaking up for those who are too scared. I want to enjoy my favourite game again. I want to enjoy making CC again. I want to feel like a part of THIS community again. Simblr is where I started and where I grew, and though it sometimes can be tough to be here, it’s my home.

Simblrs are just as valuable and important as any other part of the Sims community and no one can take that away from us, not even EA/Maxis.

Just a few things to add...

I have nothing against the “high value” people or any Youtubers. They are just taking advantage of the opportunities given to them, as anyone in their position would. The issue I have is that it’s always them and no one else, but I don’t blame them for that because that’s not their fault.

I’m not going to name names. Sorry, I know some of you want to avoid supporting the people I mentioned being bullies but I left the program to get away from the bullshit and if I name names those people and their fans will come after me and I got enough of that in the GC Discord.

I will still be buying new packs. I love The Sims 4, no matter how much the management sucks, and I’m going to continue to play it because it helps me deal. Even before I became a Game Changer my FAQs page has always said “EA could literally announce a pack called something stupid like ‘Plant Life’ with just a single ugly little pot plant in it and I would pay whatever they ask”. If you choose not to support the game anymore that’s great and that’s your right to do so, but please don’t give out to me for wanting to continue to do one of the only things that makes me happy.

I will still be doing reviews of new packs. Just because I’m no longer part of the program doesn’t mean I won’t be giving my opinions of new packs, nor does it mean my reviews are going to change. My reviews have always been my 100% honest opinion and that won’t change. The only difference now will be I don’t get early access so my reviews won’t be up until after the pack releases, but on the plus side, I also won’t have to deprive myself of sleep and run myself into the ground to review an entire pack in less than 24 hours like I had to do many times with early access.

Saying “I told you so” is not helpful at all. I was aware from the start that Game Changers were free marketing, I’m not an idiot. I was just naive enough to think that they treated everyone the same within the program.

I stayed for as long as I did because I was stupid enough to think I could help change things. I thought adding my voice to the ones already trying to change things (who are still there trying now) that together we might be able to light a fire under the CM’s butt and get some changes happening to make the whole program more friendly towards creators from ALL platforms but it’s literally like banging your head against a brick wall. Nothing is ever going to change because they don’t want it to, but hats off to the few people still in there trying; they have way more patience and sanity than I do.

Not all the Gurus are bad. In fact most of them are really great, super friendly and treat everyone equally within the whole community; you only have to go to one of their live streams (on their personal Twitch channels, not the Sims official one) to see that. It’s mostly just the CM who I was referring to in this post.

It’s now been TWO MONTHS and SimGuruFrost never got back to me. I am no longer able to log into the Game Changer Network (the site we use to opt in to opportunities for upcoming games and DLC packs) so my credentials have officially been revoked but the CM hasn’t said a word to me. Even though I know for a fact when other people have asked to be removed from the program he practically begged them to “just take a break and then come back when you’re ready”. Just goes to show, standing up for people and fighting for what’s right will get you nowhere within the program; all they want are yes men.

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illateyouricecreamlastnight · 3 years

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PLZ READ

OPEN FOR 1 WEEK

You know

Sometimes when i open my nofic,first thing i will see is....art request. I wanna draw em,but my motivation not really up for it and it ended up late answer. I was trying to figure out how am i suppose to stay motivated with the art request.

Then,after a few experiment....i finally found a way

I will answer art request on weekends :]

That's where my brain literally have no idea to draw. So here's the rule:

Art request will be answered on Saturday and Sunday at my time. (Except if you need comfort art,i can do it ^^)

You can send me requests from Monday till Friday,but not at the weekend cuz i don't want my inbox being a mess :']

You can send it through ask or dm. You can even ask me if you don't want me to post your request on my blog

And no,i won't do illegal drawing. Keep it clean

Remember this one? ^^^ yeaaaaah i can do the light one-

If i didn't answer the requests on that time,maybe because i was busy or my health is not very good. Dw,i'll inform if my request still open or not

Oh and if you ask me something that i not normally draw,i'm so sorry if it look bad :']

Aaaaaand...make sure you give a pic as a reference :']

So here's the thing i can draw:

Fandoms

Ocs or Sona

Draw the squad or memes

Scary or bloody things (but i'll delete the pic in my gallery later :'])

Photo like art (example; you and your ocs having a group photo)

That's all you need to know. I will add things if neccesary.

Bye- :]

#art request rule

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m-y-fandoms · 3 years

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1 Thing I Love & 1 Thing I Hate About EVERY Danganronpa Character Part 1

Part 2

SPOILERS FOR ALL THREE MAIN GAMES

I’d love to hear our opinions as well in the comments or my inbox or DM’s! If you try this trend with DR characters, tag me!

Sayaka Maizono

♡ Her passion for her career and friends.

✘ The way she tries to screw over Makoto when the game had just begun. Like wait and see what happens before screwing over such a great guy? Leon didn’t deserve it either.

Leon Kuwata

♡ His voice actor (English), and how real and human his execution was in that we all would be so scared and irrational. It was just so iconic and sad as it’s our first introduction to the death in this series and we all think: “shit, this is real... they are really killing these kids.” I didn’t think it would be that brutal, just seeing his body limp at the end with the haunting music.

✘ His design is disgusting. I hate how he looks.

Chihiro Fujisaki

♡ So innocent, so kind, so intelligent

✘ Shouldn’t have been killed for such a stupid reason, also they did Mondo dirty with that motive for killing as well. Just a mess. As for the actual character, Chihiro cries right off the bat when you do your introductions and that was kind of annoying to me personally.

Mondo Oowada

♡ He has a lot of respect, understanding and emotions for someone I thought would be a hard-ass douche biker.

✘ The worst motive to kill ever in a game where you know you’re getting executed if you’re found out. Like you’d be extra careful and that’s his reason to kill? Lazy writing.

Celestia Ludenberg

♡ Bad bitch energy and her goth lolita design.

✘ Manipulation and double murder. Bad bitch energy only goes so far. Confidence is different then selfishness. Also, of all the chapter 3 triple murders... the worst motive to kill.

Kiyotaka Ishimaru

♡ Emotions: secure in his masculinity, able to cry, show emotions, and apologize when he’s wrong. He’s funny and likable.

✘ The Ishimondo white hair thing was stupid. Taka was fine on his own.

Hifumi Yamada

♡ Writing takes talent, fan fiction as much as any other style or genre. Also the talent of his voice actor (who also voices Kiibo/K1-B0).

✘ Literally everything else about him.

Sakura Oogami

♡ I love everything about her. I love her wisdom, loyalty, design, voice etc. Just step on me, mother.

✘ Why the hell would she ever agree to be a spy even if it meant the end of her dojo? I just don’t think she would do that rationally because she isn’t selfish. The others would suffer for her spying. She remedies this with redemption in her letter in chapter 4 but still she should’ve said no off the bat. Everyone had something to lose. The dojo wasn’t worth spying for monokuma. Also I just don’t think she would commit suicide. She can’t help the remaining students survive and redeem herself truly if she’s dead.

Kyoko Kirigiri

♡ Bad bitch energy, calm and collected when I could never be.

✘ Especially in future arc of the anime, damn can you show some emotion please? Through your words and expressions not just your actions. Sure she was willing to “die” for Makoto but like I just want more emotion from her sometimes, even in THH.

Makoto Naegi

♡ So pure. I Love Bryce Papenbrook. Makoto reminds me of Sora and I love his design.

✘ In THH I didn’t mind his innocence but in the Danganronpa 3 future arc anime, when people started straight up abusing him and accusing him, he needed to grow a little backbone.

Byakuya Togami

♡ Love my dad, king shit, also love how over the progression of the games and animes he becomes a little more kind to his friends.

✘ Why the fuck did he mess with Chihiro’s body? Just so cruel and disrespectful.

Yasuhiro Hagakure

♡ Funny magic man. Sexy voice.

✘ Please. Please Hiro use your brain just once. Why do we have to prove Kyoko isn’t a ghost?!

Toko Fukawa

♡ Character development in UDG and I love Genocider.

✘ Putting down herself and others constantly gets old in THH.

Aoi Asahina

♡ Love her voice actress and her personality

✘ We really just gonna get everyone killed in chapter 4 huh? Surely you know they don’t all deserve that.

Junko Enoshima

♡ A very memorable villain with great hair and design.

✘ I just can’t stand her. I hate her so much.

Mukuro Ikusaba

♡ Her mercenary background is super cool as a concept.

✘ Too bad it wasn’t explored nearly enough.

Hajime Hinata

♡ Seeing the protagonist be a little less naive, innocent and positive than Makoto was a refreshing change, although I loved Makoto. I liked Hajime’s cynicism and expressions that sometimes just screamed “this shit again, huh?”

✘ I enjoy the way Izuru looks but I hate him as a character. He is sexy to look at but Hajime is just a better character overall

Teruteru Hanamura

♡ His love for his family and mother especially is so cute and heart breaking if you know the full story.

✘ He needs to know when to dial it back and quit with the perversions. And no it’s not just how he looks, Miu needs to chill at times, too.

Twogami

♡ I feel like he genuinely cares about his friends, just hides it well

✘ His death felt like a cop out and poorly written. It just didn’t sit right with me. Also his design is disgusting to me, his outfit and such.

Mahiru Koizumi

♡ Loyal to her close friends.

✘ I just have no interest in her as a character and I find her boring.

Peko Pekoyama

♡ Loyalty. Loyalty is something I value very highly in every form of relationship. Peko is also very hot.

✘ Come on girl... I know how you were raised but you should’ve known Fuyuhiko didn’t think of you as just a tool and you two should’ve expressed your true feelings long ago. Like even in secret. How do you live like this? Also I feel like killing Mahiru could’ve been avoided with a calm talk.

Ibuki Mioda

♡ Cute design, positive vibes.

✘ Cringe sometimes in the way she talks.

Hiyoko Saionji

♡ Beautiful character design and some very good insults and snarky remarks at times.

✘ Just irredeemably mean and annoying. Even when you do her free time events she is just so annoying.

Mikan Tsumiki

♡ I like her design as well as her hair, expressions, sprites and clothing.

✘ I hate her. I just hate her whether she’s in her true psycho form or timid stuttering form. She’s just annoying in my opinion.

Nekomaru Nidai

♡ So supportive, can hold my drink at a party. Respects everyone and wants the best for them.

✘ Bro Mechamaru was a stupid plot point. I just couldn’t stand looking at him and couldn’t take it seriously. Still sad when he died though.

Chiaki Nanami

♡ From chapter 5 of sdr2 on she is impossible not to love if you didn’t already. Just the selflessness, the sadness of the reveal and execution, how she returns to help Hajime at the end???? I love her. I love her hair design, color palette, her personality, everything.

✘ I’m bitter and miserable about her being the only class member to actually die (the despair arc anime) also her falling asleep at random times is kind of odd and she doesn’t seem to be like that later on in the game??? Like it seemed like a cheap joke but not actually who she is? Hard for me to explain.

Gundham Tanaka

♡ King shit, couldn’t praise him enough. He’s sexy, loves animals, and is funny as hell sometimes. His voice actor is a saint and a cool dude and I named my guinea pigs after the Dark Devas (yes I know they are hamsters in the games.)

✘ Come on dude. I get that being from Hell and magic and having evil powers is your shtick, but we all know that you and Nekomaru sacrificed yourselves so the others wouldn’t starve. We know you care about your classmates. There comes a time when it’s time to let personas and facades fade and be true to your heart. I just feel like him denying he cared at the end hurt. We all know he cared. I didn’t like how he was haughty until the end. He deserved better. I love him.

Nagito Komaeda

♡ I love him so much. So cunning and intelligent, always a step ahead. And he’s big sexy.

✘ Him killing himself in chapter 5 hurt me so bad I was like in denial for days. Also hate how Bryce Papenbrook gives him a raspy stoner psycho voice in the game then a light airy higher-pitched voice in the despair arc anime. It just bothers me. I love his voice still but the inconsistency just hurts my OCD

Sonia Nevermind

♡ I love that she’s so interested in her passions and love her feelings for Gundham

✘ Her outfit and bow are atrocious. Also why didn’t she start liking and talking to Gundham sooner on? Their romance bloomed late and it would’ve made for a better chapter 4 ending if they were a bit closer.

Kazuichi Souda

♡ Cool design and outfit, love his voice (also voices Kaito in V3) and his backstory is relatable at times. He’s also very human in that he’s scared a lot of the time or insecure or blames others in panicked situations. It’s not always a good thing but it’s human and realistic.

✘ Gosh he can be so annoying. Sometimes flirting or whining too much is well... too much.

Akane Owari

♡ Strong-willed and definitely someone I would be friends with

✘ What the hell is her outfit? Gymnasts and athletes don’t wear that shit. Stop objectifying her when it doesn’t even make the product or plot better. Like there’s absolutely no point to making her dress that way. I was a gymnast for 15 years. Even those who do parkour (which Akane seems to do more often than actual gymnastics in the anime and game) don’t wear what she wears. Also she’s underrated.

Fuyuhiko Kuzuryuu

♡ I love him. He’s the DR character I’m most like out of all the games and anime. Tenko is a close second. I think he’s adorable, love his character arc, development, redemption, and love his voice.

✘ In the anime/despair arc, Fuyuhiko is not done justice. He doesn’t get enough lines, has a different voice actor, just doesn’t give off the same vibes.

Izuru Kamakura

♡ Sexy man long hair good.

✘ Boring character. I wish he were just Hajime.

Kaede Akamatsu

♡ Loyalty and leadership are such attractive qualities in her. Also she faced her death with such class and dignity and I respect her because I could never.

✘ Some of the voice lines Erika does for her are just weird and cringe. Just random moans or grunts... I don’t know it’s like when Ann Takamaki from Persona 5 (also voiced by Erika) makes suggestive noises as well. Just grinds my gears. Also hate her outfit down to the hair pins.

Shuichi Saihara

♡ I love his nasally voice. I love his design and he’s so adorable. I love how emotional and compassionate he can be. He ties with Makoto for favorite protag of mine.

✘ That sprite where he sniffs his hand. And his ugly ass hat.

Rantarou Amami

♡ Sexy man, sexy voice, sexy piercings

✘ Ugly outfit, and wasted potential

Ryoma Hoshi

♡ I respect him and feel bad for his outlook on life and for how poorly he views himself. I love his little hat as well and he’s the first “different styled” character (Hifumi, Bandai, Teruteru) that I liked the design of.

✘ I hate when he says “got a long ways to go,” it’s overused and annoying, and wish he gave himself more credit. Also hate that when you first meet him he warns you that he’s killed people and is dangerous to be around. Come on buddy, you know you wouldn’t hurt your friends. Stop pushing them away.

Kirumi Tojo

♡ Competence, well rounded, skillful

✘ Boring as hell. I wouldn’t waste one free time event on her.

Angie Yonaga

♡ Dark skin, super cute, love her talent as an artist myself.

✘ Gives religious people a bad name and is super manipulative which I hate.

Tenko Chabashira

♡ I relate to her and feel bad when she’s misunderstood. She’s a good person deep down. Also love her sprites.

✘ There’s more cunning, funny and clever ways to write her digs at men.

Korekiyo Shunguuji

♡ I’m in love with this man. Long hair, voice, mystery, mask, intelligence, passion, talent.

✘ He definitely was a victim of abuse and a lot of people refuse to see that and just hate him. Team Danganronpa should’ve given him a redemption arc where he realized his sister abused him and changed.

Gonta Gokuhara

♡ I love his design except for his suit. Also he’s so cute and naive. I cried for his trail.

✘ No need talk like caveman. Better way to do this.

Kokichi Ouma

♡ Like Nagito, I value his intelligence and crazy cunning.

✘ Shouldn't have died. Also shouldn’t have manipulated Gonta. That was just cruel.

Miu Iruma

♡ She has her hilarious moments and her death surprised me and was sad.

✘ Sometimes she lacks basic empathy, i.e. calling Tenko “Tencrotch” when she just fucking died.

Maki Harukawa

♡ Amazing character development. Didn’t see her surviving until the end at the start. Also her love and passion for Kaito.

✘ “Do you wanna die?” gets old.

Kaito Momota

♡ Just the overall best bro you could ever have.

✘ Has some toxic masculinity issues and anger issues.

K1-B0

♡ Pretty much everything about him. His design, his attitude and personality, especially how amazing and cool he is chapter 5 onward, his execution made me so sad. He’s so innocent and funny without trying.

✘ When you do his free time events he’s very arrogant and just talks about himself a lot... it seems odd and not similar to the Kiibo we see throughout the game.

Himiko Yumeno

♡ Super cute design, love her voice and “Nyeh...” and her sprites. Her character development is great as well.

✘ Why did they take so long to make her important and likable?

Tsumugi Shirogane

♡ An excellent and well hidden reveal

✘ I hate her. So annoying, from the voice to the references and her personality.

319 notes · View notes

binniesthighs · 3 years

Text

hi hi cuties and thigh enthusiasts!! just about a day ago my lil blog full of hornies and changbin thirst reached 1,500 and i am just jaflkjasd :’) since then haha

ah ah this post is already so cheesy hehe but i wanted to say thank you so very much from the bottom of my heart for following me along with my journey with this blog! after having the hobby of writing for the greater part of my life, i’m so immensely thankful that i started this blog and hopefully took ya all on some of the crazy adventures i keep locked up in my head hehe

having this blog has been such a wonderful experience, from learning about myself as a writer, exploring the many, many hornies that i’ve got, and most of all, meeting all of the freakin’ fantastic individuals in this community! ~thank you to each and every one of you for being the sweetest, loveliest, most hilarious and welcoming people i could ever wish to meet and have the honor of getting to know and write for!~

to celebrate, i wanted to make a lil list n’ love letter to my lovely pals for ya to check out! there is fkn CRAZY talent on this list and i highly recommend that ya check out everyone and their masterlists!

to my moots~ GAH I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH my whole experience here on smutblr has been made absolutely amazing by you all! GOSH hehe i am full of so much love for you all your brains are seggsy as hell and i’m always rooting for you!! thank you so much for being my friends <3

to my readers~ my loves, thank you, as a writer, to bee seen and heard fulfills every word i write and every lil idea i scribble down. wherever ya are in the world, thank you for taking the time to read my pieces and for sending me love. you are my reason!!

to my anons~ thank you my darlings for all of your kindness, screams in my inbox, every song rec, hard thought and word of encouragement. my lil anon family i love you and appreciate you all so much! thank you for reaching out to me and makin’ a lil home on my account! it means the world to me! <3

to my bunch of (ro)ses~ thank you so much for hyping me with each of my updates, for showing up in my notifs and being overall frickin’ angels! thank you so much for reading as always and i hope that ya like what’s to come!

~hehe i wanted to write ya all lil messages too! while they just scratch the surface, please know that i love ya all to the moon and back!! 🥰~

🌹Writers🌹

@aliceu ~ alice, hehe here’s to all the times that we would ramble about fantasy aus and bounce ideas off eachother, thank you so much for being my go-to and my muse at times! your works are literally magical my love!

@bearseungmin ~ hehe dawn i think that you might be one of my oldest moots on this list! ever since i started out here in this lil corner on the internet, you have been the most supportive, sweet individual there is to me and I can’t say thank you enough! i’m also like, highkey obsessed with everything you write hehehe

@binniesbrat ~ oh my gosh té , hehe lol i will bring this up over and over again bc i’m just so ah ah it makes me melt but fun fact hehe back when i was babybinniesthighs, té reached out to me, and made me felt like i belonged--i literally lysm! your hornies are fantastic my dear, we are so lucky to have you here!

@bruh-changbin ~ dear sky, while we’ve only talked a little in asks, i wanted to express how very dear you are to me! hehe when i update and you hype me up it literally makes my whole frickin’ day! you keep me going! not to mention that your writing is *chef’s kiss* teehee

@bubblelixie ~ ah! kc! we’ve also been moots for a good while, i think back when i was babybinniesthighs too! hehe your overwhelming love and support of me makes my heart frickin’ swell and seeing you in my notifs and my asks with hornies makes me feel so dang fuzzy! you are quite literally one of the most adorable cuties on here! your writing also just *knocks me out* OOF

@chaangbin ~ ours is quite the story dear hazel bean...meaning....i was like, the biggest, nerdiest fangirl of your work for quite some time and very very shy to tell you that it was me ahhhhh haha well here i am ooP your writing is so beautiful and human and immersive in so many ways! i’m crazy lucky to be moots and friends with ya! omg if i say more i will literally embarrass the heck out of myself hahahhaha

@decembermoonskz ~ beautiful izzy, you are such, and i mean such an inspiration to me. the way that you write is so gorgeous and i feel as if i’m in every scene. the way that you create worlds and place your readers in them is frickin’ insane! hehe i love obsessing with ya over chan any day and night! keep goin’!

@dom--minnie ~ len, when i think of comfort, i really think of you. the way that i feel so safe with ya is like, insane. even when we first started chattin’ i just knew that we had an amazin’ thing coming hehe. from horny rambles to literally just talkin’ bout life, i am absurdly lucky to have met you here! you literally deserve everything wonderful in life and i love ya so much!

@etherealeeknow ~ gah gen, my dear, the way that you checked up with me over my lil break just huhuhu thank you so much for being such a lovely and caring person towards me and everyone else whom you meet! you are so precious and i hope ya never forget that!

@fight-me-m8 ~ darling and sweet rosetta, FRICK literally when i think of you oh my gosh i get the fuzzies, i’m so happy that we met and that i was able to witness the beginnings of your account! you have so so much love to give and i will fight you and give you more love back. bb i’m so happy to have you as a moot!

@film-in-my-soul ~ alex! hehe while our friendship is still in the bb stages, i wanted to throw some love your way too!! i’m so hyped to write with you in the future and talk even more! i love how fast we clicked when we started talking about BLs AHA darlin’ you are so sweet and i can’t wait to get to know ya more!

@formidxble ~ kim oh my god, you are a frickin’ force. when you entered this community a lil bit ago, and then made it your own, sharing with us your beautiful brain and lovely kindness, i swear the world must’ve taken a breath or something LOL you always astonish me with your works and i’m literally so excited for what the future holds for you!

@hanflix ~ i think that i speak for so many of us here that rue, you are truly an inspiration. back when i was starting out and even now, reading your works feels like such a treat and i try to savor them all up! as a writer, i look up to you so much and as a wonderful, humble and hardworking person i look up to you as well!! thank you so much for welcoming me when i was babybinniesthighs ilsym!

@hongnanglen-arina ~ arina my fuckin’ love oh my god if i could fly to where you are i frickin’ would!! i really think that the universe did a lil somethin’ somethin’ allowing us to meet. i feel so comfortable with you talkin’ about anything and everything especially hornies they are fkn’ unbridled. i can’t count how many times you’ve made me topple with laugher at like 3am. i’m so happy to have you in my life!

@hyunsluvv ~ kathy istg you are one of the sweetest people i have had the pleasure of meeting on this lil corner of the internet! the care and love that you give to each of your anons, moots and in your work is truly astounding. i remember when you were just starting out i knew that big things were in store for you, and they still are! hehe

@imagineinnie ~ el, you are literally an angel if i have ever met one. it means the whole world to me when i see your dms, and the way that you check up on me and so many others goes to show the utter kindness and selflessness that you exhibit. cutie, thank you so much for always cheering me on and being such a light in this community!!

@instachans ~ kenny, although we’ve just met, i’m already so excited for our friendship to come! you are such an angel and have so much love to give, i’m so thankful that you slide into my asks hehe the future holds such amazing things for you!

@itsapapisongo ~ javi, my dear, there’s just somethin’ about us that flows like frickin’ water. i feel like there’s the people that you meet in life that you kind of just click with, and i’m immensely grateful that i’ve met you. your love, support, hornies and lethal timing with gifs keeps me smiling. you are an astonishing writer and i feel so lucky to be here with you!

@jisungsplatforms ~ sweet ina hehe i’m so glad that ya slid into my asks the day that you did! your vibes are so sweet and peaceful and i feel as if you and your account are such a safe place! i love, love sharing hornies with you over our boys! there is so much ahead for you my dear and i can’t wait!!!

@mochinnie ~ omg i’ve totally said this before so many times, but i am so, so wowed by your work isa and they stick with me for like days after i read your pieces! i am so utterly inspired by you! i love your blog’s aesthetic and how you are always truthfully yourself i admire this so much! when i was starting out your works kept me goin’! thank you so much for this hehe

@mzmezzler ~ ryan you literally deserve the whole world! not to mention that you are doing god’s work writing sub!skz! sweets, each of your pieces are so wonderful and imaginative and your lil memes and thoughts are so cute! please always keep doing you!!

@ohmysparkle ~ sparkle: oh my gosh where can i start??? you are one fkn’ badass sparklin’ cat and my freakin’ role model. every day i am so astonished over how well spoken, wise, and reasonable you are while also being off the walls unapologetically yourself. my dear plz always shout with me about sub!hyunjin teehee

@seungmoomin ~ nia big sexy brain!! holy shit the fkn talent in this bus? astronomical! nia i am absoluately WEAK over your writings and highkey you as a person over all! i swear, your blog is a gold mine and your personality is so wonderful i can’t put it into words LOL there’s no one quite like you and i can’t even count how many times you’ve got me dying laughing here ily!!

@yourdaddychan ~ LUNA my queen of capitalization and screaming in dms, you add a spice to my life that i didn’t know was missing. talking to you in every format is fkn fantastic and lights up my day no matter how gloomy its been. i really feel like this is your world and i’m just livin’ in it LOL I LOVE YEW

🌹Readers🌹

@introjoonie ~ mai, this account would literally not be in existence if not for you, and it’s provided me with such happiness over these few months! thank you so much for encouraging me to let my hornies to the wind, and for listening to all my rambles about it since. thank you so much for being a lovely best friend, cheerleader and person. i’ll be seeing you soon!

@jeonglixie, @lechanters, @inlovewithasa, @pixxie-lixxie ~ my loves there is something so, so beautiful about each and every one of you, i cannot thank you enough for reading my works and for being so overwhelmingly supportive and kind with your feedback time and again. i’m so blessed to have such wonderful readers such as you! my time here on tumblr has been made by you and so many others of my unbelievably sweet readers!

@lovesfaith ~ ahh tumblr is being rude not letting me tag ya but sweets i just wanted to thank you so much for your kindness too! i adore talking with ya about astrology n’ just life and the way that you read me like a book is CRAZY haha thank you for being you Bambi!

@meow-minho ~ marine, every time that i see you on tumblr i am so thankful for your grace, and just lovely welcoming vibes. i am so thankful to have such a lovely person as you in my life and i can’t express how much me (and i’m sure so many other writers on here) appreciate your feedback. thank you so much!

@synnocence ~ wonderful cee, since first meeting you i feel like i’ve had the pleasure of getting to know such a wonderful human and equally amazin’ fellow bin stan! i can’t thank you enough for how much you’ve helped me grow my bin collection! dm-ing with you is always such a joy and you deserve the frickin’ world my friend!!

once again, thank you so much for poppin by and giving me a read, an ask, a dm or simply just sending bin pics my way hehe

i hope to write much more in the future and to lash out with all the hornies that i’ve got! i can’t wait to share more with you all! thank you so much for being my motivation, as well as seggsy ass cuties who i am so lucky to share this space with!!

have you thought about changbin’s thighs today yet? well...now you have 😉

#binniesthighs #uglycries #milestone hehe #Ro loves you so! much!#thank yo so much!!!

70 notes · View notes

woozisnoots · 3 years

Note

Hello alex! Maybe I'm to early for having a emergency request but I haven't really going anywhere outside my house beside buy groceries and I haven't socialize properly in months (maybe there is a bunch of people can relate). It's stressing and make me mentally exhausted for months 😭😭😭 can I request something like joshua fluff or wonwoo fluff that can comfort us? And I get it if you can't do it since I think I'm to early for asking. Anyway hope you have a nice day ❣️

no ofc it’s not too early! pls, i want to do this for you guys 🥺💓 these are meant to be small so i ended up doing both. i hope you enjoy and if you ever need someone to talk to, my inbox and dms are always open!

𝙨𝙥𝙚𝙣𝙙𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙦𝙪𝙖𝙧𝙖𝙣𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙚 𝙩𝙤𝙜𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧!

° pairing: joshua x reader, wonwoo x reader ° genre: fluff! ° word count: 1214 ° warnings: none! ° tagging: @jaeyoonurl bc she has a thing for j*shua hong

masterlist!

— joshua

in the scenario that you and joshua are living together in a small apartment complex, he does the slightest bit to annoy you whether it be intentional or not

like he’ll either make you stay in bed with him longer than usual so you’d be late to a zoom class / meeting

or he’d purposefully flick you behind the ear while you’re cooking which causes you to accidentally pour more than just a pinch of salt on your eggs

since josh owns that little projector that has slides of all the different constellations, he would turn it on right before you guys go to sleep as you lay next to each other on the bed and just stare at the stars from your ceiling

he loves making jewelry to pass the time while you guys watch netflix together. and wants nothing more than receiving an accessory that you made yourself

“joshua hong, please!” you fling your arms up to reach for the object now in joshua’s hands, much to your avail. “it’s literally so ugly. i beg you, please don’t wear it!” the little jump you add doing nothing but exhaust your energy.

you knew it was bad idea, you should have trusted your gut the minute joshua left to get the groceries. forty-five minutes was just not enough time for you to possibly make a small thank you gift for you boyfriend. a token to say, ‘this is what three years has gotten us.’

“but you gave it to me!” joshua refutes back. you let your guard down, breathing rapidly in order to catch your breath from the unnecessary movement of having to keep up with him. he, on the other hand, took this as an opportunity to run, sprint away from your wrath and make a clean line for the bathroom before shutting the door to securely lock it in place.

joshua hears your wallowed out screams coming from the other side and softly chuckles under his breath, wondering when you’ll ever get used to his childish antics at times. he safely unravels his hands to reveal the tiny object. and he can’t help but smile wide, ear to ear, and think, ‘so that’s why i felt something pointy.’

you’ve given up at this point. by now, he’s probably already seen your gift and for all you know, everything is doomed. your hand laid flat on top of the door, deciding whether to shrivel in front of him now or wait until he confronts you first. yet, he’s able to make that decision for you as he abruptly opens the door causing you to fall forward straight into his arms.

“why, hello gorgeous,” you watch from underneath him, the corner of his lip rising up to form a cheeky smirk. you squint your eyes menacing at the thought that he could possibly be wearing the horrid gift you made. tilting your head to the side, you open one eye to catch a glimpse of green hanging from joshua’s left ear. he turns his head just slighty so you could get a better look. “you’ve really out done yourself, if i had anything to say about it. though i have to say, i didn’t think you’d go for the cute food aesthetic. i thought you hated avocados.”

blood immediately rushes towards your cheeks and hide your face from joshua’s vision but he was too quick. using his brute strength, he pulls your weight so you’re standing in front of the mirror, back facing him. your mind spirals as you feel joshua tuck strands of your hair behind your ear. “awe lookie, i knew you’d be wearing the other one,” he says before deliverying a small peck to your cheek, leaving you a scrambled mess. “what a perfect anniversary gift.”

— wonwoo

spending time with wonwoo during quarantine would be rather quiet and simple, but that doesn’t mean your time spent together is boring

having little to nothing to do all day makes you realize how much renovations you guys can do around your home

your morning conversations over breakfast would be about different home décor that you found on amazon and you would end up having such a fun time talking about it because you guys turn them into little debates over if the items are actually necessary

that being said, wonwoo would be so willing to buy anything that would fill your guys’ boredom. and yes, that would include getting two separate desks, possibly four computer screens, two headsets, two light up keyboards for the heck of it, and of course: two very comfortable gamer chairs

no, he would not let you win at any games for freebies — you gotta earn that shit

out of all the days of the week, nothing was ever reserved for sundays. truly, every day was a free day — lounging around, doing chores, testing new cooking hacks to see if they actually worked. but sundays especially were just extra... boring. the very end of the week with absurd nothing to do. which has led you to spend this sunday morning in front of your dual computer screens with your boyfriend joining you on the other side of the desk.

“damn it!” you exclaim, lightly slamming the keys on your keyboard due to this endless frustration boiling inside of you since you’ve started playing. “how do i keep losing... it’s club penguin for fucks sake!”

your hands collect your face with pure dread and exhaustion, wondering how your supreme logic failed you during card jitsu. you hear a hearty chuckle coming from wonwoo sitting across from you. “the cards are just in my favor, sweetheart.” he eyes you as he takes the warm cup of coffee to his lips to take a sip. “how about, best two out of three to see who has to make breakfast?” the huskiness of his voice growing deeper with each word, leaving you in trace for just a moment.

you ponder at the bet, looking back between the screen showcasing your pink penguin and your beautiful barefaced boyfriend, ultimately coming to a decision. “what about. i watch you wipe out your penguin foes for the next few rounds and then we can make breakfast together,” you suggest instead, your mind thinking far beyond your apparently lousy deck of cards.

“fine by me,” wonwoo shrugged, adjusting himself comfortably to his seat. you silently admire him from where you are, noticing how notably meticulous he was being when he’s focused. wonwoo’s eyes captures yours but gives you a puzzled look. “are you not gonna come over here?” he quietly asks.

the simple question makes your head drop, feeling embarrassed as you try hard not to show him how flustered he made you. regardless, your legs move without you having to think it over. and instead of sitting on the small space that he left for you on his chair, you move his arm aside to face him before straddling your legs and sitting on his lap.

wonwoo, completely unfazed, takes his free arm not holding his mouse and tugs you in closer to his chest so you can lay your head on his shoulder. for the remainder of your morning, your eyes slowly start to droop to the sound of penguin screams and victory.

#caratwritersclub #seventeen fluff #jeon wonwoo #wonwoo fluff #joshua hong #joshua fluff #seventeen scenario #seventeen #wonwoo scenario #joshua scenario #wonwoo x reader #joshua x reader #seventeen x reader #seventeen fanfic #😚.anon #💓.asks

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ghostburs-blue · 4 years

Note

hello! if you can, could you do prompt 46 and 57 with spencer pls?

I’m soso sorry it took so long for me to answer this! I’ve been struggling with a major case of writing block but I hope you like it <33 I wanted to give you quality work instead of trying to rush on it and get this out as soon as possible! Enjoy anon and thank you for supporting me!

You’re Perfect

Request: “ hello! if you can, could you do prompt 46 and 57 with spencer pls?” > #46: “Please don’t say that about yourself. Please don’t believe that. You’re so much more than that. You’re so…” / #57: Heart eyes when the other talks, sings, dances, argues, does literally anything especially things which others make fun of them for or find annoying

Summary: People are mean and y/n doesn’t love herself

Warnings: talks about not eating, not drinking, low self-confidence, mentions of depression, in general lots of angst, fluff ending *please don’t read if any of these are sensitive or triggering topics for you!!!!*

Word count: 3k

A/n: this was actually a really good way to relieve my own feelings <3 it was almost a vent write? please DO NOT read if these are triggering subjects to you. i want you all to know that you’re beautiful and spectacular and you all mean so much to me. please take care of yourselves! my dm’s and inbox is ALWAYS open for you to come and talk to me if you feel as though you need to or want to. love you all dearly!

~story below the cut~

You gave a small laugh as you grabbed another piece of bruschetta from the plate in front of you.

“Are you sure you want to eat that y/n?” One of your friends, Sadie, casually commented.

Your hand faltered as you brought the piece of bread to your mouth.

“I- what do you mean?” You asked, slightly confused.

“I just mean,” Sadie paused and looked around the room at the group of girls clustered on the sofas together. “You’re getting a little plump, you know?” She laughed. “Especially around the… stomach,” she waved her hand around your tummy area.

Some of the other girls nod. “Yeah, watch out. Especially if you want to look good in that bikini you bought for our beach trip,” another girl, Maddy, smirked.

You carefully placed the bruschetta back on the plate, trying to give a small smile. “I, I wasn’t hungry anyway,” you attempted to give a small smile that you hoped hid your tears. “Thanks for the warning guys,” you offered.

The group smiled. “Of course, we’re just here to tell you the truth,” Sadie chirped. You gave a curt nod.

You ended up leaving the hangout early, you had lost your mood to have fun after the… interesting comments made.

Heading back to your apartment, you shut your phone off and took a hot shower.

It was only 10:30 when you decided to call it a night, not bothering to check your phone for any messages or notifications.

You woke up early the next morning, slowly climbing out of bed.

Making your way to the bathroom, you stood in front of your mirror. You stared at your reflection, taking in your appearance. Almost numbly, your hands rose, pulling and pushing at the skin on your face.

They made their way to your lips, dragging the flesh down with it. They froze as they reached your mouth, a single finger tracing the outline of it.

“I love your lips,” Spencer’s voice echoed throughout your head. “They’re beautiful and feel so good under mine,” he assured you. You had just told him about your insecurities about them; growing up, many had told you that they were too large, didn’t fit well with your face. Spencer kissed all the confidence back into them, making you feel good about them again. The memory slowly vanished from your mind.

No, you fought back. No, he’s a liar. No part of me was beautiful then, no part of me is beautiful now, you thought angrily, hands gripping the countertop so hard your knuckles turned white.

You brushed your hair and teeth, throwing on only enough makeup to hide your dark circles and sunken cheeks, much less than normal. Trudging to your room, it was the same story with your outfit. Normally you liked to make your outfit cute and coordinated; today you had no drive to do anything of the sort.

Throwing on a plain white blouse and some mom jeans, you grabbed your phone, keys, and a bottle of water before leaving for work.

Pulling into the parking lot, you stepped out of your car and immediately kept your head down as you walked in. It was still early, early enough that probably only Hotch would be here.

You sat down at your desk in the bullpen as you grabbed pulled a stack of manila folders. Today was supposed to be a paperwork day, meaning there would be no stress or hassle of cases or investigations. Nonetheless, the rest of the team and you always had a go-bag underneath your seat for any emergencies. You prayed there wouldn’t be one today.

As 8:30 rolled closer and closer, more of your teammates started showing up. Morgan was first, exclaiming a loud, “Hey babygirl!” when he first saw you. You offered a small smile and stood up to hug him like you always did when you saw each other in the morning. You watched as he briefly skimmed your outfit, taking in the look. You noticed as his lips pursed, then stretched into a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes as he headed to his desk.

Next came JJ, then Garcia, following the same pattern as Morgan. The same tight-lipped, overdramatic smiles. Then, Reid. The one you were dreading the most.

He practically ran in, slightly out of breath and winded as his eyes frantically searched the room. They softened and his body relaxed as they landed on you.

Walking over, he spun your chair to face him, tilting your head up to meet his gaze when you hesitated to make eye contact with him. He kissed your forehead as he spoke to you gently.

“Hey babe, I was worried when you didn’t reply to my messages last night or this morning,” he murmured. You looked up and tried to hide the look of despair in your eyes.

“Yeah, I decided to sleep a little earlier than normal,” you lied easily, attempting to relax your rigid body posture.

Spencer clearly didn’t buy it, but didn’t try and push you further on the topic. He nodded, kissing you once more before heading to his own desk.

Turning back to the mountain of paperwork in front of you, you didn’t need eyes on the back of your head to know that the rest of the team was talking behind your back.

You stood up suddenly, heading to the kitchen to grab some coffee. You brewed yourself a fresh pot, back pressed against the counter as you absentmindedly scrolled on your phone while waiting.

As soon as it was done, you poured yourself a cup of the dark liquid, not caring about how hot it was. Walking out the room, you turned the corner, promptly running into Garcia. The coffee splashed out of the cup and onto your white shirt, effectively staining it and turning it seethrough. You hissed from the pain.

“Oh, hon I’m so sorry!” Garcia exclaimed, frozen in shock. Coming to her senses, she quickly ran into the kitchen and came out with a few paper towels.

She tried to dab your shirt and soak up the liquid, but it wasn’t doing much. The wet fabric clung to your body, and you felt extremely exposed standing in the hallway, where anyone could see you.

“Do you have any extra shirts?” Garcia fretted, trying to stay calm. You gave a small nod and grabbed her arm, smiling.

“Love, it’s okay. It’s just a shirt,” you murmured, though it seemed like you were trying to reassure yourself more than her. “I’m going to grab one from my go-bag, okay?” You comfortingly squeezed her hand, then turned to head into the bullpen.

You took a deep breath before stepping out into the brightly lit area. Uncomfortably, you crossed your arms over your midsection, quickly making your way over to your desk. As you bent down to grab your go-bag, you felt everybody’s eyes burning into you. A touch on your shoulder caused you to jump and replace your arms.

It was just Spencer.

“Y/n, is everything okay? What happened?” He gestured towards the coffee stain peeking out from the top of your crossed arms, attempting to pull them down to see more. You stepped back and only tightened your hold on your body, shaking your head.

“It’s only a little spill,” you reassured him. “I just need to grab a change of clothes,” you smiled at him.

Unzipping the duffel bag, you swallowed as you looked inside. All the shirts were tight-fitting, accentuating your body. You closed it suddenly.

“On second thought,” you winced and looked up at Spencer. “Do you still have my hoodie in your car?” You asked him. He nodded, confused.

“Yeah, I do. Why? Don’t you have clothes in here?” Reid asked, gesturing towards the bag.

“Uh, yeah, but… I’m feeling cold?” You replied, voice turning up at the end. He frowned.

“I’ll go get it. Just, stay here?” He offered, heading to his car to get the jacket.

Sitting down in your chair, you attempted to make yourself as small as possible and hide from the confused stares of the others. Just as you were sure someone was going to break the deafening silence, Spencer reappeared with the light grey hoodie in his hands.

You breathed a small sigh of relief, almost feeling like you could cry as he handed it to you. Thanking him, you went to the bathroom to change.

Stepping out of the restroom, you caught sight of JJ ahead of you, walking in your direction. She stopped, greeting you with a smile.

“I was just about to tell the team,” she started. You groaned, already knowing what she was going to say. JJ nodded, agreeing with you. “We have a case. Head to the briefing room as soon as possible,” she said with a grim look. You nodded, heading straight there and nabbing a seat.

The rest of the group filed in, and you saw Hotch and Rossi for the first time that day. Hotch gave you a once over, taking in your grey baggy hoodie and loose jeans. Some emotion filled his tired eyes, something you were too exhausted to decipher. You didn’t even bother to look at Rossi.

JJ started the briefing, the team adding comments and guesses throughout. It was a sad case, surrounding women being abducted from college campuses in California.

Hotch stood, surveying everyone before he announced, “Wheels up in an hour.” The group disassembled, everyone flocking to their desks to grab what was needed. You remained seated, taking a deep breath before slowly standing up and following the others.

If anyone noticed your mood, they didn’t say anything. You all had an hour before takeoff, so the group collectively decided to head for a quick lunch.

You didn’t order anything, claiming you felt a little under the weather when Spencer nudged you and asked about it. You nursed a glass of water and stayed out of the conversation, only giving your two cents when someone prompted you to.

Eventually, you all boarded the plane. You still didn’t eat, looking in disgust at your go-bag filled with clothes pushed below your seat.

The moment the aircraft landed, you pushed yourself into work. You didn’t give yourself much time to eat or drink, taking on job after job to solve the case. It was tiring, but it kept you hidden from the problems you desperately needed to face. So, you did it without complaining.

The clothes were a big part of the problem. Pulling a black pencil skirt out from the duffel bag after you had settled in the hotel room, you were met with a memory.

Spencer’s arms wrapped around your waist as he rested his chin on your shoulder. You both stood in front of a floor-length mirror, gazing at your reflection in the clear glass. He pulled back just enough to twist your head towards him, placing a gentle kiss on your lips.

He grinned at the sight of the two of you in the mirror, drinking in how the skirt looked on you.

He groaned. “You look so good,” he whispered, causing you to smile and laugh a little.

“Thank you babe,” you replied, a grin gracing your features. “I needed new clothes for work, figured that this would be okay to wear,” you giggled. Reid nodded violently.

“Wear this and I won’t be able to concentrate on anything for the rest of the day,” he murmured in your ear, causing you to give him a playful shove.

Looking at the skirt now, you wanted to vomit. It was tight in all the wrong places, making your body look bigger than it already was in your eyes. With a sigh, you stuffed it back in your bag and sat on the ground, back against the bed.

You pushed the heels of your palms against your eyes, trying to stop the flow of tears threatening to be released.

You jumped up as a knock sounded at the door. It just turned out to be JJ; she was letting everybody know about the plans for the next day.

Though you could see a small frown grow on her lips, she didn’t say anything about your disheveled appearance.

Most everyone gave up on trying to get you to sleep or take time off once the case had begun. They had tried to force you to take a break, but the team knew that you rarely stopped working until you solved the murder(s) you were assigned to.

However, only Reid seemed to notice the extent of your overworking; this was too much, even for you. But every time he made an attempt to talk to you about something other than work, you would cut him off or divert him back to the task on hand.

You felt as though you were sinking. You had all the lifelines you needed surrounding you, all you had to do was reach out and grab one. Every time you tried, your limbs went heavy and your arms refused to move. You were sinking, and didn’t know how to swim.

After what seemed like far too long, you had narrowed down a suspect for the abductions of the poor women.

It was Hotch’s idea to send you and Morgan in first. According to the profile, he would listen to strong female authority, while Morgan would back you up and make sure you were safe.

The plan worked great, fortunately, and the team was able to save the kidnapper’s most recent victim from a horrible death.

As forensics teams swarmed the scene after handcuffing the predator, the rest of the group and you surveyed the house. The majority of the predictions made were accurate; mind the minor few details scattered here and there.

As you, Reid, and Emily walked through the main bedroom, you felt a sudden bout of weariness come on. You leaned against the wall, trying to control your breathing.

You faintly heard Emily talking about something in the background, but you couldn’t fully make it out. Your eyes closed, and you felt yourself slowly sink to the floor as you lost the little amount of strength you had left in your body.

You became aware of footsteps rushing over to you, the sound of Spencer’s voice growing louder and more frantic.

“Y/n? Y/n can you hear me?” He exclaimed, looking around for help. Eyes focusing on Emily, the last thing you heard was someone screaming, “MEDIC!”.

Your eyes blinked open, slowly adjusting to the bright fluorescent lights of the hospital. You had been in and out of consciousness since the crime scene, remembering vague snippets of strangers’ voices calling out or Spencer’s worried face looming over you.

Looking down at your body, you had been dressed in a white hospital gown, though majority of you was covered in a blanket. Turning your head to the side, you caught sight of Reid dozed off in a chair next to your bed.

“Babe,” you called out, but your throat was dry and hoarse. Clearing your throat, you tried again. “Reid!” You said. He woke with a start, eyes panicked. They softened as they landed on your small smile.

“I- what happened?” You asked him, coughing slightly. A small frown settled on his lips.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” He whispered, looking hurt.

You gave him a confused look. “Tell you what?” You replied.

He shook his head. “That you haven’t been eating or drinking enough,” his voice cracked slightly, causing your heart to break a little. You gazed into his deep brown eyes, melting as you noticed the pools of tears forming in them.

“I can explain,” you started, but he shook his head.

“The doctors said you had orthostatic hypotension, or a fainting spell caused by starvation, dehydration, and stress,” he murmured. You felt a sigh escape as you looked away from your boyfriend sitting next to you. You couldn’t bear to see the disappointment etched on his face.

“I’m not good enough for you,” you muttered under your breath, not expecting him to hear it.

“What?” He asked, caught off guard.

You turned to face him again. “I’m not good enough for you!” You exclaimed loudly, throwing your hands in the air. “In fact, I’m not good enough for anything. I’m not smart enough to be on the team, I’m not pretty enough to be your girlfriend, and I sure as hell am not good enough to mean anything to anyone.” It was your turn to start crying.

Spencer quickly rose, grasping your hand tightly in his. He looked at you, and you could see the love and pain swirling in his eyes. “Please don’t say that about yourself. Please don’t believe that. You’re so much more than that. You’re the light of my life, the highlight of my day every time I see you. You’re the perfect ray of sunshine our office needs, hell, what the team needs to get through cases. You are perfect, y/n. I love you so much. Please, never believe those things about yourself. You’re perfect just the way you are,” he finished, tears streaming down his face.

Without a second thought, you looped your arm behind his neck and pulled Spencer in for a kiss. His lips were salty, the taste of his tongue mixing with the salty wetness from his tears. You two pulled apart, breathing heavily.

“I love you too,” you whispered, pressing your foreheads together before hugging him tightly.

Slight coughing by the door caused you two to look up. You grinned as you noticed the rest of the team standing by the doorway, bittersweet smiles on their faces. They entered the room, each giving you a hug and scolding you about your current situation. You forgot how much you missed them.

From that day onwards, you worked towards loving yourself. It took a long time, months blending into years before you felt comfortable in the body you had been given. But no matter what, you had your rock. You had Spencer, and you were better because of it.

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tansypoisoning · 4 years

Text

Tansy’s Spooky Challenge

Because the World is terrifying :D

To celebrate this milestone (1k followers :O) I’m starting a challenge which hopefully will give back to this community in terms of exposure of less known authors (or just authors that aren’t known by my followers) and in creating more stories. I’m so thankful for all the attention I’ve been given, and I hope to give you guys my attention as well.

I love writing challenges because they give authors motivation to write (sometimes even things out of their comfort zone), because they’re a great way for writer’s to promote themselves, and because it’s a great way for the person hosting it to find more stories and authors they could end up being big fans of :D I especially encourage people with less followers, or whose works I haven’t read to participate.

The main objective of this challenge is to write something that has an element of horror in it. It can range from a situation that seemed scary but is okay, to something that is a little eerie, to pure unadulterated terror. As for rules:

You DON’T have to be following me to participate.

You have to enter with a reader insert/OC fic. There doesn’t have to be any smut or shipping, and if there is, the relationship DOESN’T HAVE to be about dark!character or dark!reader.

I’ll read works for any fandom, but the ones I’m most familiar with are Marvel, Overwatch, Snowpiercer, Knives Out, Naruto, Avatar:The Legend of Aang

You can submit drabbles, one-shots, or an entry of a serialized story.

A single prompt CAN be used by more than a single person.

The fanfics can be of any length, but if they’re on the longer side, please try putting a ‘Read More’ in there somewhere to avoid making things difficult for people reading on phones.

Things that are not allowed in terms of content: underage sex, bestiality, graphic child abuse (allusions are ok) I don’t think anyone would submit an entry that I would have reservations reblogging, but if in doubt you can ask me for help. Give warnings for any sensitive topic you bring up.

Tag your fic with “TansySpookyChallenge2020”

Send me an ask or dm telling me you posted it, preferably a dm. Asks can get eaten by the inbox, and tagging doesn’t always work.

Deadline is November 24th. You can DM for extensions

PROMPTS BELOW

Choose one item from each list and work them into a story. I allow and encourage trying to game the system with multiple interpretations of a term, less literal readings, or wordplay.

List 1

Happiness

Jealousy

Nostalgia

Desperation

Fury

Triumph

Sadness

Acceptance

Fervor

Disgust

Awe

Confusion

Hope

Craving

Foreboding

Denial

Loss

Ennui

Adoration

Sympathy

Pain

Betrayal

Commiseration

Anxiety

Rancor

Determination

List 2

Sink or swim

Chokecherry

Crossroads

“Let me see what you have.” “A knife!”

French vanilla

Something forgotten long ago

The shore

The eye of the storm

Bathtub

Corn hell

Down by the river

Baby’s breath

A little fire

An old saloon

Unearthed bones

On the move

Before dawn

Dead men walking

By candlelight

Frankenstein

Prima Donna

A hill about a mile outta town

First dance

Ritual

Underground

A small request

These text prompts can be used however you want: whether you want to have them in your story in their entirety, use bits, write something around them, something inspired by them, or just something you think has a similar feel. Just let me know which you picked.

There is a Corvette parked in front of the building, just by the front door. You approach the vehicle as if compelled by an invisible force and look in through the closed window. There’s none inside, but you see, in the driver's seat, illuminated by the neon lights of the bar, a white cowboy hat with a golden band. This isn’t the first time you see this hat.

The hole is no more than eight feet long and three feet wide. You peer in deeper, but you can’t see the bottom. There’s a soft but grating sound coming from somewhere within, like sharp nails raking against a metal plate. You can’t see the bottom, but you think you can see movement inside.

You abandon the warmth of the laundromat for the biting cold of the outside world. To your right, the road extends for miles and miles into the night, as it does to your left. There’s no place for you to go, but you can’t go back inside.

The light of the neon sign proudly displaying “Rising Sun Motel” shines through your door. You had closed and locked it before taking your shower – you know you had, because you do it in every room you rent. You take a cursory glance of your surroundings. Nothing is out of place or missing. Must be a faulty lock. The night is windy and could have pushed the cheap door open. You go to lock it again, and when you turn around you see that the closet door is slightly ajar.

The land is flat as far as the eye can see and identical houses with identically manicured lawns sprout from it as far as the eye can see. You run up and then down the street (or is it down and then up?) but you can’t seem to find anything else. The people look so friendly when they smile and wave as they pass you by, but you don’t ask them for directions. You look at your phone. You have signal, but all you can get your internet to show you are advertising for washing machines and sites with recipes for awful things preserved in aspic. The date and hour on your home screen keep changing. You’re positive you’ve been in this place for hours, but the sun won’t set.

“B-but… I don’t understand...” “We have checked the security footage three times and found nothing. There are also no signs of forced entries. No fingerprints.” “-My phone! I took pictures, I know I took-!” “We found nothing on your phone, in the SD card, or in the Cloud. There’s nothing.” “That’s impossible!” “We searched as much as we could. I’m sorry, but… are you sure-” “I know what I saw! I know it! Look again!” You aren’t imagining things. It couldn't have been your mind. It couldn't, it couldn’t, it couldn't

What kind of convenience store has taxidermy heads for decoration? You ask yourself as you roam the aisles of the near empty shop. You peek from behind a row of shelves to one side and spot the clerk. He’s old and severe looking, and although his pupils are pointed in your direction, you get the distinct feeling he’s looking right through you. You move your head to the other side of the shelves and spot another one of those fucking deer heads. This one’s large, wet eyes are turned to a fixture in the ceiling, but you would swear it’s watching you.

Rain pelts you as you stand at the dock, waiting. You hope your boat will arrive soon. You look over your shoulder into the mist and see nothing that should give you pause, but your leg still won’t stop shaking. You touch your arm by reflex and wince when you brush your cut. You think your makeshift tourniquet is working, but it looks fragile, like it could get dismantled at any second. In this weather, you’re sure is just a matter of time. You look over your shoulder again. Still nothing, but you fear it won’t last. You hope your boat will arrive soon.

The living room is dark, but you don’t turn on the lights. You are still too close. You move to the kitchen, and there you feel safe enough to reach for the switch. The illuminated room, much larger than it needed to be, is a ghastly land of contrasts. The many counters and their many marble tops are covered in trash. The tile floors, formerly clean enough to eat out of, are now muddied, not a single spot spared. The eyes of the two stoves are covered by pans and pots boiling foul mixtures. Through the window you can see the sprawling lawn and walls of hedges. They will hide you, but for how long? There is something waiting for you in the hallway, something terrible. You have to address it before sunrise, but for now you’ll wait here. The kitchen isn’t half as bad as the rest of the house.

‘The Bystander Effect’ is the term used to describe the phenomenon in which people don’t intervene in emergency situations when in a group, and, the larger the group, the less likely they are to intervene. You know this to be true, even without doing any research, as you hobble your way through the maze of alleyways. Your cries for help had gone unanswered, bouncing off the concrete walls into a multitude of uncaring ears. It’s just how it is in the big city – every man for himself, and the devil take the hindmost. So much for safety in numbers. The truth is, in this city, surrounded by all these people, you’re more alone than you’d ever been.

You take the first step with care, mindful of all the ice. The second is a little clumsier. On the third you almost slip. You skip the fourth and fall on the fifth, rolling down the stairs and landing face first in the snow. You scramble to get back to your feet and run to your car. You have to get home. You lock yourself in and don’t bother with the safety belt. You shove the key in the ignition and turn and turn but nothing happens. Did you leave it in the cold too long, or- There’s no time to think about it. You step out of the car and start running, into the freezing night. You have to get home, you have to get home now.

Cleanup time is always a hassle. You wish you didn’t have to do it, but it wouldn’t be fair to leave the mess all to your partner. You two near the open trunk of the car and load the heavy cargo into it. Your companion seems the most affected by the weight, and you offer an apologetic smile. Fair is fair though; it was your turn to carry the feet end.

Skinny dipping had seemed like a good idea when your friend suggested it earlier, under the sweltering sun. Now, standing in front of the pool in your bathing suit, all by your lonesome, you start to regret having agreed to her scheme. Wasn’t she supposed to have arrived forty minutes ago? She said she’d bring people too, because skinny dipping alone isn’t fun. Well, now you are all alone in the cold, and you suspect that is even less fun. Just as you make up your mind to leave, you see a car through the chain link fence. It pulls up just before the gate and the engine turns off. That must be them.

#TansySpookyChallenge2020

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atlcsfcllen-a · 4 years

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Alright, now that we know his semblance, heres my take on why Ironwood shot Oscar. Now that he has panicked for a bit, Ironwood is actively using his semblance to focjs on one thing, saving Atlas. Based on the convo he had with Oscar earlier in the volume about humanity, I beleive he may be using his semblance to shut out anything that might stop him from saving Atlas, incluiding his own empathy and compassion. Combine that with what he percieves as a betrayal from Oscar, and you get... that

Which is a super valid point to make!

Before I like-- get into this, I just want to express, very clearly, that just because I have salt with the series, does not mean that you can’t enjoy the show. I’m not going to come down your throat and rip you a new one, or slide into you DM’s / inbox and be like ACTUALLY. YOU’RE WRONG. Because genuinely, love what you want to love. Enjoy the show for what it is and indulge to your heart’s content. The biggest reasons I even have my salt tags are so people can continue to enjoy the show, even while I’m over here going harumph.

With that being said, I just want to make this clear to you, too, that anything said is based on my salt. Not against you. Not against the ask you sent. Your opinion is valid. It will always be valid and it will always earn & deserve a safe space here on this blog. I get heated, but I get heated about the subject material - not the person involved.

That being said...let’s dive in.

SO.

I imagine that with the timing of the reveal of James’s Semblance, this is what RoosterTeeth wants you to take away from that information. They want you to know his Semblance and recognize that because he has ‘Semblance-based-hyperfixation’ [ which is a complaint all on its own for me... ] he’s able to bypass everything within him that should tell him ‘no. this is wrong. don’t do this.’ His goal is set on saving Atlas and nothing is going to get in his way.

That’s dope.

The problem I have is that, if he’s forgoing his sense of humanity in an effort to do what he feels is right, why not shoot Team RWBY? Why not shoot Yang when she admits to giving Robyn the information about Amity Tower? Why not shoot Ruby when she attempts to evade arrest and hides behind his desk to send out her warning message? Because they’re Team RWBY? Because they’re exempt of any and all consequences in the story?

So then, what about the twelve-year-old farmer boy with zero Huntsman training? James, the 40+ year old general of Remnant’s most powerful army, can’t just tackle him to the ground? Subdue him if he doesn’t like the kid talking shit?

Oscar backs away from him. Is clearly intimidated and frightened by him. Puts his cane away. Insists that he doesn’t want to fight and based on previous interactions with other characters [i.e. Qrow at Beacon ] James also doesn’t want to fight. So like-- why even reach for his gun at all? If Oscar is clearly backing down, why doesn’t the dude with military training read that and put him on the ground? Knock him unconscious, even, and throw him in a cell?

James doesn’t sentence Roman to death.

James doesn’t drop Watts into the lava.

WHICH. To be totally honest? Could have easily swayed my decision on him shooting Oscar. I wouldn’t have liked it, but that’s the point. Imagine how much more weight and sincerity this would have had for his actions. If he dropped Watts into that lava pit, and then turned around and acted the way he did in the office, and then shot Oscar? OOF. I could’ve bought the whole ‘tinman losing his heart’ in a SECOND.

Then we have scenes like Nora screaming at him about Mantle and rightfully so! He is taking Mantle’s resources for a project that he believes is for the greater good. It doesn’t make it right, even if he, as a character, believes it to be - a morally grey conundrum that was perfect for his eventual fall. And I was freaking ready for it. I was ready for James to snap back at her. I was ready for us, as the audience, to go-- gasp! James! You’re really coming apart at the seams, aren’t you?? I was ready for him to be demanding and commanding in a way that raised immediate alarm bells. Instead, the dude says nothing.

Instead, he sits down. Has a bit of a moment, but tries to concede with Nora. With Ruby. Agrees, even, to meet with Robyn and negotiate a deal. To assist Mantle in this way. Even despite later on choosing to abandon it, in an effort to ‘save who they can’ - which, again, morally grey conundrum that could have been done so much better.

But it’s like-- James concedes. Time and time again, we watch him fold. With Jaune, we get the brief, momentary glare, but then he stops. Breathes. Recognizes that he knows Jaune is right and that he’s trying.

These are the biggest problems that I have with the end result being shoot Oscar. There is nothing in his character beforehand that eludes to him making this decision. To falling apart this violently literal seconds after apologizing to, who he presumes is Winter initially, for the presumed fate of Fria.

I want James to make bad decisions.

I want to be mad at him and not the story, because that’s what his character was built to be. From his first introduction, we know that James’s end result is stepping into the shoes of a morally grey character. One that will leave you screaming at him because he’s making all these horrible decisions, under the assumption that he’s doing the right thing, protecting his people, keeping everyone safe, but we, as the audience, recognize this isn’t the case, because the story has built around that.

What we get, in actuality, is a sudden and immediate thrust into villainy. Even the part at the end, when Winter texts him about the Winter Maiden’s powers, and he has that cliched villain scream that just eludes to what’s going to come next-- it’s all there, setting him on a path that he doesn’t belong in.

Personally? The only way that I could make peace with Oscar being shot [ I guess?? ] is if the conversation between the two didn’t just elude to James speaking at Ozpin. Show me that he’s speaking to Ozpin. Show me that he’s so lost, so upset, and so paranoid, that he hallucinates - momentarily - seeing Ozpin standing in front of him. That he’s slipping and falling and he has nowhere else to go anymore, and because of that, he’s absolutely losing it. Give me that angst. Let it be something like:

James: “I am done letting other people’s inability to see the big picture, get in the way of doing what’s right. Robyn. The Council. This kingdom. Even you, Ozpin.”

Oscar, tentatively: “...James?”

James: “...No. To you, it’s general.”

Feed me that level of angst. It would give his actions so much weight, and there would be so much to unpack there. Let the light leave his eyes as soon as he pulls that trigger; shattering what little of himself remained. Severing all ties with everyone he’s ever known and/or loved for the sake of completing his goal. For the sake of doing what he thinks is right.

Let me be mad at the character for his pisspoor actions. Don’t make me be mad at him. Don’t shove it down my throat like-- hey. hey. did you get it?? do you get that he’s the villain of this arc???

No. I don’t. Because there is a massive difference between villain and antagonist. So smooth into his antagonist arc. Show me that he’s going to be the force against the protags. Let James get mad. Let him make several bad decisions, such as [ if the story continued to care about these plot points ] leaving Mantle to freeze to death because Amity is more important. Declaring that Robyn is an enemy and should be treated as such; no negotiation. Sending Winter to retrieve the Maiden’s powers while simultaneously drawing back his forces from Mantle; Clover included - leaving a serial killer loose on the streets.

There was so much they could have really played up before reaching the dramatic climax for James’s character, and it just kinda really grinds my gears, given that James had everything required to get him there.

At the end of the day, however, it is RoosterTeeth’s story to tell and I do recognize that, but it doesn’t mean I can’t be salty about it.

#salt #[[salt]]#[ ooc ;; mun hours ]#is this a meta?#does this count?#my first ever meta.#look at me!#a smol bean growing up in the world like a pro!!#thank you so much for the ask though!!#like--#legit #i hope this doesn't scare you away?#your opinion and love for the show IS valid and is ALWAYS welcome here friend #legit.#i just like--#have a LOT to say LOL #james ironwood #rwde

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sketchguk · 4 years

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Hi, friends! I can honestly say that I’ve been on Tumblr for about 9 years, but only 7 of those months have been spent on this account. Being a part of this fandom means so much to me, and as cheesy as it may be, I’ve never felt so much love from a community like this. I think that I should spread a little love back to everyone through this festive follow forever post in the spirit of the holidays (there’s also a message for my beautiful followers at the very end, so bear with me). Although I may have not spoken to you all personally, you’ve made my experience here amazing!! Whether it’s seeing you on my dash or in my inbox, you’ve all made me smile one way or another!! I’ll admit right now that I’ve sent so many anonymous messages to you all because I’m really shy, haha. Not to mention, I follow so many amazing content creators, gif/gfx makers and fic writers alike, and I want to make you smile as much as you have made me!! Y’all are so lovely, and I’m not totally sure why anyone chooses to interact with me or to follow me nonetheless. Maybe you’ve read a fic of mine, or none at all, I appreciate you all the same 💕 I know some of you may be in and out of hiatus, but just know that I’m thinking of you!! And if this is the first time you’re coming across my blog, I guess this is a good time to introduce myself. Hi, I’m Teresa. It’s nice to meet you 😄

If you’re reading this, hopefully we can chat a little more. I would love to get to know such lovely people 😊 To my beautiful mutuals, I love you all sooo much 💓 I’m not the best at expressing my feelings, but I hope that this is a start! @190713 @95swifi ✩ @alwayschoosechocolate ✩ @aureumjeon ✩ @beebopboobop ✩ @boobearcupcake ✩ @btsaremyfaves ✩ @btssmutheaven ✩ @bwiq ✩ @engeljimin ✩ @ddaengwrld ✩ @emiyooa ✩ @geniuslab 💌 ✩ @gimmeyoon (@gimmeyoon-main) ✩ @girlwiththespecs ✩ @gukgalore ✩ @gukkheaven ✩ @guktwt ✩ @hobimygs ✩ @hoseoknysus ✩ @idiotscalledfriends ✩ @joonary ✩ @kitsutaes (@geniusguk) 💌 ✩ @littlemisskookie ✩ @llsanjoonie ✩ @lovehrs ✩ @magicshop-myg ✩ @map-of-yoongi ✩ @maptoyoongi ✩ @mercurygguk ✩ @minflix ✩ @minlexia ✩ @minyoongsueit ✩ @mygsii ✩ @outroguks ✩ @pjmskosmos ✩ @sdmnluv ✩ @softaellie ✩ @spookitokki (@spookitokkimain) ✩ @starrytete 💌 ✩ @syugasshi ✩ @taesseok 💌 ✩ @tokyoscript ✩ @ve1vetyoongi ✩ @vminary 💌 ✩ @vtbts ✩ @vxngguk ✩ @wthkook ✩ @yourdelights 💌 If your url is bolded, scroll down for some words of affirmation. ✨ If you have an emoji (💌) next to your url, scroll down for a special message. 😇🌟 And here’s a shoutout to some of my favorite fic writers, because you all allow me escape to my happy place !! Thank you so much for contributing to the writing community !! This online space is pretty hectic, especially as of late, but you all make it worth it. Even if you’re taking a break from writing, I am here cheering you on !! And to let you know that I’ll support you no matter what. I hope you never lose your spark for passion and creativity !! Sometimes life gets the best of us, and other times, things are not in our control, but I want to send my love and appreciation to you nevertheless. Your fics have inspired me to try my own hand at writing, and I’m forever grateful ✨ You’re spectacular, every single one of you, so never forget that! Kpop isn’t that serious, but I’ll probably think about your fics until the day I die. @bymoonchild ✩ @floralseokjin ✩ @foreverpark ✩ @geniuslab ✩ @gimmeyoon ✩ @gukgalore ✩ @gukkheaven ✩ @guktwt ✩ @jamaisjoons ✩ @gukyi ✩ @kookswife ✩ @kinktae ✩ @kpopfanfictrash ✩ @minflix ✩ @mygsii ✩ @personasintro ✩ @prolixitae ✩ @readyplayerhobi ✩ @spookitokki ✩ @ubemango ✩ @ve1vetyoongi (yee, you might see some repeats because my moots are super talented) 💖 A love letter from me to you: 💌 @geniuslab Megan !! This might sound soo sappy, but you’re the very first person I followed when I made this blog !! It’s because I’ve read all of your fics (perhaps more than once on my old account), and you inspired me to start writing as well. You have no idea how happy I was when you said you would get back into writing fics. I guess I’ll expose myself right now, but I’ve sent a few anons to you on the matter haha (yes, I am a 7 Chances enthusiast, one of many). You’re so talented, and I admire you so much 🥺 A gif maker and fic writer ?? Nothing you can’t do !! Among other things, you’re such a kind-hearted individual. I’ve read plenty of your text posts, and there’s just something so warm about the way you carry yourself. You deserve the world, and I wish for nothing but the best for you !! I hope you have an amazing new year and that you have space for peace, love, and healing. Please know that I support you through and through, and that you are well-loved ❣️

💌 @kitsutaes (@geniusguk) Yas !! I know we just started chatting, but I love getting to know you !! It’s hard for me to reach out to people because I’m shy, but I’m really grateful that you hit me up 😊 It’s been so nice getting to know you, and I hope we can get closer 💕 I’m already learning so much about you because our chats just flow from one topic to another !! You said you wanna visit new york one day, so I’ll hold you to that 😉 I’ll be your tour guide, and the only exchange I’ll ever need is your friendship !! Some dried mangoes would be nice too 😚 haha jk … unless 😳 I hope you have an amazing year filled with lots and lots of love. May you receive everything you’re wishing for !!

💌 @starrytete Mirelle !! I’m still getting used to your new url LOL. But how could I ever forget you?? You are quite literally the human embodiment of an angel. You’re always spreading positivity, and I adore you with all my heart. I wish that I could be as radiant as you !! All the emojis that I’m using in this post?? An homage to you 🌼☀️ I don’t think I can ever look at emojis the same way thanks to you haha. Sending you lots of love!! I hope we can speak more in the future!! May the new year bring you happiness and good fortune!! Please take care of yourself, ok?! Message me whenever because my inbox is always open 🥰

💌 @taesseok Mia !! I just love seeing you on my dash. I’ll give you a quick run down: Teresa: :[ Mia: *posts* Teresa: :] It’s like the universe knows. You’re a light in this world, and I hope you never lose your spark !! May you smile as often as I do (all thanks to you) 💗 I wish for nothing but your happiness since you deserve it and more. In fact, it’s the world that doesn’t deserve you and your sparkle !! I hope this year was rewarding for you, but I already know that 2020 will be better and better. I’ll be sending you lots of positive energy for the new year hehe 💞 Hopefully we can talk more soon !! I’d love to be friends !!

💌 @vminary Kiara !! I’m so happy that you reached out to me all those months ago because you’ve become one of my closest online friends !! I can’t tell you how much you mean to me because the limit does not exist. It’s so easy to talk to you, and sometimes our conversations are big sis/lil sis -esque (I’ve always wanted a sister lol 🐣). I feel as if we’ve taught one another so much, especially because of our cultural differences and the tiny age gap that we share. I find myself missing you because of the time zones LOL. In the middle of the day, I’m wondering whether or not you’re sleeping well :’) Why do you have to live across the world?? 😔 I would totally send you a package if I wasn’t broke haha. I’m sending you all my love here though, and I hope that’s enough !! 💛

💌 @yourdelights Destinee !! You are SUCH a sweetheart. The messages that you send me are so kind, and I don’t know what I did to deserve you. Do let me know how you stumbled across my blog because I feel like you’re way too cool for me LOL. Your posts are always so hilarious, and the tags have me dying. Your sense of humor >> !! My love for you is immeasurable, and I hope you know that, ahh. I think it was truly solidified when I found out you’re a fan of day6 and the rose :’) I’m not really a multi-stan, but from that moment on, I was sold. That was the only time my instincts did not let me down 🌹💝 I swear I’m getting introduced to new fandoms because of you haha. And when you went on a lil hiatus, I really missed seeing you on my dash !! I hope that you’ll be with us for a long time though !! I really can’t wait for what’s in store for next year, because no pressure or anything, but I’m sincerely excited for your WIPs hehe. I’m rooting for ya, so make sure you make the new year your b*tch !! Lastly, thank you so much to my followers !! I see y’all in my activity, and I wanna let you know that I love you from the bottom of my heart !! At this point, I’m more of an update blog than a fanfic blog LOL :’) And if you follow me because you’ve stumbled through my fics, I just want to say 🤯 what?! It blows my mind that anyone reads my work, let alone enjoys it. I never would have though that I’d find solace in reading and writing considering I’m a full on STEM nerd. In conjunction with that, I literally started writing fiction 7 months ago to this day. I didn’t even realize that it would lead me to such amazing connections. With so many lovely people, popping in and out of my dashboard, inbox/DMs, and activity page, my heart b u r s t s with love!! Your interactions mean the world to me, even the most minute things like reblogs make my heart flutter. I really do check the reblogs to see if anyone has left a tag. Single words and keyboard smashes mean the world to me too !! Before I was a fic writer, I was just a silent reader. I always admired writers for the worlds they craft, the characters they develop, and the plots they devise, all for it to come together in one cohesive work of literature. Now that I have a vague understanding of what that’s like, I know that it’s nothing short of strenuous. Words are so powerful, and although I’m a really sensitive sap, I’ve read so many things that hit me to the core, and now I’m sure to tell the authors how much I enjoy their fics. If they went through hours (perhaps days/weeks/months) of drafting, writing, editing, and formatting, a quick comment from the reader really doesn’t hurt !! It’s the most rewarding thing a writer could ever ask for. As an amateur author myself, being on the receiving end is the thing that keeps me going !! I promise you, I don’t take any of it for granted. Your words seriously resonate with me, and it’s a huge motivator for me !! I hope that in the new year, I can work on new pieces for you all (as much as I don’t want to make up excuses, juggling life is not easy as a student!!) I always say that I write for myself, and as true as that is, I want to share my stories with you lovely people !! I pour my heart and soul into my work, and the build up of excitement is nothing if it means I can’t share it with someone else. So, old supporters, new supporters, look out for new content in the future. I hope you’re as excited as I am for the new year!! Please take care, y’all, and remember that I love you. My inbox is always open 💌 So let’s be friends 😇

#follow forever #mutual appreciation #this banner is so fugly pls don't stare at it for long LMAO #i spent longer than i should have making this @ 3am #went through way too many drafts #but it's worth it if i get to express my love !!#sincerely sorry if i forgot anyone :(( i'm new to this #i wish i could send you all a love letter !!#i would include love to gif/gfx makers but they're gonna see my banner and clown me LOL #happy new year loves <3 #i was afraid to post this bc i didn't wanna be annoying sksks i'm sorry #mutuals

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