#I have so many incorrect quotes at my disposal | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

theewrites-tf2 · 4 years

Text

Thee goes from 0-to-100: The Oneshot

OKAY, Anon is now OFFICIALLY off, so I’m free to post this! Be warned, it’s LONG it’s a RANT, and I've been holding this in all day, right next to my finals-stress for college, so grab a helmet because it’s a bumpy ride.

Blocklists. Hate ‘em, love ‘em, make memes about them when they’re still relevant, they exist. While the purpose of their creation is still fully asinine to me, I must admit that the FIRST time I was placed on a list such as the one we have in our lovely fandom, I was surprised to say the least.

Thankfully, the memes and shitposts that followed helped my low-self esteem at the time to keep afloat, so now I can laugh about it, and when a SECOND blocklist rolled around, I was expecting to be able to laugh just as easily about this one.

Then I found out that not ONLY was the new blocklist poster ‘TOTALLY isn’t trying to start drama UwU’ but they’ve PROVEN this, by harassing and bullying a 16-year old for having a differing headcanon about a fictional character.

“Oh Thee, silly you!” You cry, “Surely you must be mistaken! Yes the blocklist is annoying and pointless, but surely this person isn’t BULLYING MINORS-!”

Our darling Blocklist poster, I allowed to make sure their name was blocked out for their privacy. But the sixteen year old, who made this post?

She REQUESTED I block her own URL, because she fears FURTHER harassment and bullying from this individual, and whomever else could come after her because she “speaks up about the blocklist.”

Let me repeat for y’all in the back:

Because a 16 year old MINOR had a different opinion with another blog, the Blocklist Poster decided to NOT exit the blog/go on a different tag/ go on a blog that shares their FICTIONAL HEADCANONS, instead they deliberately stayed and posted not once, but TWICE, responses full of insults and rude remarks over FICTIONAL HEADCANONS, to the point that the OP requested I block out her name in the screenshot so she wouldn’t be further hassassed.

See. I can HANDLE jokes on me, I can HANDLE the hate directed at me. What I don’t APPRECIATE, and what I will not TOLERATE, is people being bullied. Not on my time, not on my blog, and NOT in my fucking fandom.

Below is another message from the unnamed 16 year old blogger, who AGAIN requested that I not show her URL:

They sum it up pretty darn well (*clapclapclap*) SO I’m gonna move in with MY thoughts:

Every fandom has trash blogs. Every fandom has blogs you adore, every fandom has blogs you hate, but guess what? YOU, as the viewer who signed up for this website, YOU get to decide what blogs you do or don’t want to see. YOU get the power to block or unfollow if you don’t enjoy someone’s material. That is and SHOULD be YOUR, and YOUR decision alone.

There’s also this Magical thing called BACKSPACE. Meaning, if you do not ENJOY something, you can magically make it go away by backing away from it! Ain’t that something?!

Blocklist’s don’t do SHIT. They don’t and people who post them are attention-seeking, and demanding to be admired by the 0.2 people that actually listen to them.

Blocklists cause DRAMA. Last year, we had ANOTHER blocklist, one that actually sent several blogs into spirals, despite all the memes. These dumb, purposeless and needless lists cause unproblematic bloggers to second-guess themselves, lose inspiration or, worst yet, LEAVE.

But I can COMPLETELY get over that. I can handle that all, It’s shitty, but I can handle it. What I’m losing my shit over isn’t the damn blocklist. I’m losing my shit because

PEOPLE GET FUCKING HURT OVER THIS ABSOLUTELY POINTLESS, NEEDLESS DRAMA

People are SCARED to speak up, because they’re worried about further bullying or overly-aggressive anons knocking at your door, OVER FICTIONAL FUCKING HEADCANONS?! Are some of us SERIOUSLY that so immature?!

*SIGH*

In a perfect world, I would ask the BL-Poster to delete the damn post, apologize to this young girl, and I would expect a mature response back, and we could be able to move this all behind us.

But no, I expect the OP would claim martyrdom after being called out on their BS, rally a small army of people-with-nothing-better-to-do and escalate this drama into huger proportions.

With that in mind, I’m going to ask something more SIMPLE for the Blocklist OP:

Own up to the fact you wanted to start some pointless shit. Own up to the fact that you want to instigate pointless drama, because your childish actions CLEARLY showcase that you want this attention more than anything. Own up to the fact that you got SO bored one day, you decided that instead of calling out ACTUAL blogs that should be blocked, you decided to get your fifteen-minutes and call out blogs who have more followers than you.

So go ahead: BE FUCKING PROUD. You’re a childish, small and insignificant bully who got their 25-seconds of fame, WOOPDIEFUCKINGDO. You scared a teenager to the point that they don’t even want to post this on their own blog, WAY TO GO. And you UNSUCCESSFULLY defended a fictional character, with the cost only being that you had to bully a literal CHILD to do so, BRA-FUCKING-VO.

Do NOT try and claim innocence or ‘I-i didn’t mean to cause drama UwU’ You know EXACTLY what you did, you know EXACTLY what would happen as soon as you hit ‘Post’, and everyone else does to, so don’t even try playing that card.

Save all of us the time and energy, and just own up to the fact that YOU wanted to instigate the needless fandom drama, so we can speed up the process of you throwing a hissy fit, logging off for some ‘break from the drama’, all of us laughing and making memes, and forgetting this whole affair by next week.

Now excuse me while I go draft the shitposts, eat popcorn and watch the haters try to go on anon in my askbox, because I feel like THAT part will be the most entertaining thing about this whole affair

Peace and Love,

#*prepares for the wave of attempted-anons who forget to log off*#This should be fun #tw bullying #tw suicide mention #fandom drama #fandom discourse #tf2 #team fortress 2 #tf2 drama #tf2 discourse #I got the receipts #screenshots #blocklist #tf2 blocklist #personal #harassment ain't welcome here #and you better be prepared for the shitposts If you wanna step up to me #i dare you #I have so many incorrect quotes at my disposal

172 notes · View notes

aquamarinescarlet · 3 years

Text

Great, my girlfriend is a toddler

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Reader

Word count: ~4.5k

Warnings: one curse word (I think), mentions of past trauma (nothing graphic), and a lot of fluff

Summary: Reader is caught in a trap during a mission and ends up trapping herself in her five year old mind and body.

Author’s note: I know I basically just post incorrect quotes, but this idea came to me and I just had to write it. I won’t stop with the incorrects btw, and if you guys prefer I create a different blog to post these little stories just let me know. Without further ado, enjoy, and let me know what you think (this is my first time writing something like this too, so tips/remarks are always welcome).

Disclaimer: I don’t own any of the marvel characters.

(Picture is not mine, got it on pinterest)

“West wing clear”

“Basement clear”

“Guys I need some help here.”

You heard through comms as your teammates infiltrated the Hydra base.

It was a fairly simple mission, small base, so not that many enemies to fight off.

As you made your way down an empty corridor to the control room you could listen to Bucky's grunts, and punches, on your earpiece as Sam and Steve made their way to him.

The silence and emptiness was rather suspicious, but you made nothing off of it, thankful you would get in easily.

“I’m in the control room.” You spoke when you found yourself surrounded by computers and all sorts of technology. It seemed quite ancient for an organization that has been a pain in your asses for the past months.

Hacking wasn’t your specialty, but you sure were better at it then the other three, hence you getting the task. Your eyes scanned the room, trained on identifying threats. Surprised by the emptiness of it all, you focused on finding the main system.

You plugged the pen drive Stark had prepared and started typing, your eyes occasionally leaving the screen to take a quick glance around the room, an uneasy feeling growing at the pit of your stomach.

“Y/L/N, we’re all clear here,” Steve’s voice rang on your ear, “how are you doing there.”

“I’m nearly done,” you stared at the computer as the information was downloaded to the little gadget, “I don’t know guys, something here feels wrong, it’s too empty, too quiet.”

No response.

“Guys? Can you hear me?” Your heart rate picked up, something was definitely wrong.

In a second the download was complete, and you hastily snatched the pen drive, going for the door. Your desperation grew when you stated it was locked.

“Can anyone listen? I’m locked.” You spoke to the earpiece. “The doors locked automatically. I need help getting out.”

The door was sealed shut, not even a small slit in between it and the floor, your powers wouldn’t help you on this one. You tried to bring your heart rate down as your eyes scoured the room once again for a way out. No air vents, no windows, there was another door on the other end of the room, and you promptly made your way to it, only to confirm it was also locked shut.

Your attention was brought back to the first door, loud banging and a faint voice coming from the other side. Thankfully the boys noticed there was a problem and came to your aid. As you ran across the room, your head started to get fuzzy, your vision was not as clear as it had been seconds ago, and breathing was starting to get harder.

Before you even reached the still shut door, your body collapsed on the floor, everything going black.

You stirred in bed, shifting to a more comfortable position. Some light seeped through your eyelids, but you were tired, dragging the sleep as long as possible.

Your peace was broken by a door suddenly opening.

“What the hell happened?” A woman’s voice filled the room. She sounded angry, and upset, the hostility in her tone made you clutch the blanket harder.

“Wanda calm-” A man spoke, but was cut off by the woman.

“Calm down? CALM DOWN? Don’t you tell me to calm down, Stark, when I got back from a mission fifteen minutes ago only to learn that my girlfriend turned herself into a five year old toddler.” She was loud and it just made you even more scared of being in trouble.

A small whimper escaped your throat getting both people's attention. You opened your eyes only to be met by several stares, there were easily five or six people in that room, but you didn’t have time to count as you pulled the blanket over your head, bringing your knees closer to your chest.

Your body was trembling with fear from what you knew would come next. You hadn’t done anything, you had been a good girl, done your chores, never speaking unless spoken to, but for some reason the people from the orphanage took a particular liking in punishing you even when you hadn’t done anything bad.

You waited for it to come, but instead of the ill-disposed voice and harsh hands, you were met with a soft “hey” and a delicate hand. Nonetheless it was still frightened, making your whole body tense.

“I’m sowy, I didn’t do anyfing, pwease don’t huwt me, I’ve been good.” You cried out, tears threatening to fall.

The hand started to caress your arm soothingly.

“Hey Y/N, you’re okay, we’re not going to hurt you, okay? You’re safe here.” Your muscles relaxed slightly at the words, thick with an accent, and touch. Your mind was still on alert but for some reason your body responded to this woman in a way your mind didn’t understand.

“Seems like she lost her memories too, she still thinks she is in that horrible place.” A new voice spoke up.

“Hey Y/N,” the woman spoke close to you, low as not to frighten you further, “you’re not in the orphanage anymore okay? You are somewhere safe. Those people can’t get to you here.”

You peeked over the blanket and was met with mesmerizing green eyes, they seemed so kind and comforting putting you at ease.

“Pwomise?”

“I promise. No one’s going to hurt you. We will protect you.” She offered you a smile that made your lips want to curl into one too, despite your wariness of the woman still being a stranger.

You pulled the blanket back above your head, muttering a quiet “okay”. Your heart rate then picked up it’s pace once you noticed you would be punished for forgetting your manners, your mind still not fully understanding you were no longer in a dangerous place.

You yanked the blanket just below your chin, uncovering your whole face so you were facing the woman.

“Fank you, miss.” You spoke quickly and hid again.

She chuckled slightly and you couldn’t help but feel fuzzy.

“How about you stop hiding that pretty face of yours huh?” The words caused a smile to unconsciously tug at your lips, as you pulled the blanket down and started to sit up. “See, much better, right?”

You stared at the figure in front of you with what could only be described as adoration. She was just so kind and beautiful you couldn’t seem to stop smiling. A slight movement behind her brought you out of your daze and you landed your gaze on the several people watching the interaction, people you had seemingly forgotten were still in the room.

Your eyes went wide and a gasp left your lips before you laid back down, covering your curled up body with the blanket again. The woman noticed what had frightened you and brought her hand back to caress your back.

“Hey, it’s okay, they’re only here to protect you too. They are just worried about you.” You didn’t move, this was too many new people and having all their eyes on you was making you nervous. “Do you want me to ask them to leave?” She whispered closer to your ear and you nodded excessively.

Sounds of chairs moving, footsteps and a door closing were heard before the room fell back to silence.

“We’re alone now.”

You peeked carefully outside the blanket to be sure you were alone. When you found the rest of the room empty, you moved to sit back up. Suddenly the idea of being alone with this woman made you very shy, your eyes watching as you wiggled your toes.

“Fank you, miss.”

“Wanda”

“Wanda” You whispered, not taking your eyes off of your feet.

After a few moments of silence a question popped into your head.

“Why did you save me?” You tried to speak but the sound wasn’t higher than a whisper.

“What?”

“”Why did you save me.” You said louder. “The Sisters said that I was- I was a bad giwl, and that is why my pawents didn’t want me, and no one would want because I was bad and-”

“Okay, stop,” she cut off your rambling and you finally met her gaze, “all those things they said about you are not true, okay? Don’t believe any of that.”

“How do you know it is not twue.” Sadness seeping on your voice. “You don’t even know me.”

“Quite on the contrary, I happen to know you very well. I know you get grumpy when you wake up. I know you don’t like to wear dresses. I know you like to laugh and make lots of funny jokes. I know your favourite colour, favorite food, favourite animal, favourite movie… but most importantly,” she brought her hands to rest on your sides, “I know you are very ticklish.”

At that she started to tickle you mercilessly causing you to fall back on the bed, a string of laughs and giggles escaping your mouth. She stopped after a few seconds and you took the opportunity to catch your breath.

“See. I know many things about you.”

“Yeah.” You said amidst giggles.

“And I know that none of those things the Sisters said about you are true.”

“Fank you, miss Wanda.” She let out a laugh.

“You are too cute,” she pinched your cheeks causing you to feel shy all of a sudden, “just call me Wanda.”

Your gaze fell down to the mattress again.

“Okay, fank you, Wanda.” Your voice barely above a whisper.

“You’re welcome.” She brought her hand up to smooth your hair. “Do you want anything sweetie?” That little nickname just made you even more flustered, even though you couldn’t hide the smile that formed at your lips.

You pondered her question for a second, you were hungry, but you knew better than to ask for food outside of mealtimes, the memories of the punishments still fresh. After a few moments you shook your head.

“Are you sure?” She pushed. “Don’t you want to eat something?” It was almost as if she could read your mind. “You can tell me, it’s okay, no one will hurt you for being hungry. And we can fix up something for us to eat.” She must have noticed your hesitation. “Y’know, I’m a little bit hungry too.” She whispered close to your ear, her breath tickling your ear causing you to chuckle.

Your mind knew this was a bad idea, that you would get punished after, but Wanda was just so convincing you ended up nodding weakly.

“There you go.” She cheered.

She picked you up from the bed, but before she could lower you to the floor your arms circled her neck and your legs, her waist. You couldn’t help it, you just wanted to be close to her. She giggled at your actions, but didn’t fight it, carrying you out of the room and into a big corridor.

When the sound of muffled voices started to grow louder, your posture became tense. Wanda took notice, rubbing circles on your back.

“Hey, it’s alright, they are nice, you’ll see.” She tried to calm you down.

Your posture relaxed, but you weren’t sure if it was because of her words or just her general presence.

“Whewe awe we going?”

“To the kitchen.”

“And the people in the kitchen? Will they huwt me?”

“No honey, of course not, they care so much about you, they are here to protect you too.”

As she made her way into the kitchen, you hid your face in the crook of her neck, trying to ignore how the room went quiet with your presence.

“How is she?” A male voice asked, you recognized it from moments earlier.

“She’s okay, a little scared, seems like she did also lose all her memories, everything she knows is from when she was five.”

Wanda moved around and kept up with the conversation, to which you stopped paying attention when your eyes fell onto a thing a man was eating. You had tried one of those before, once, when an old woman donated a basket of those to the orphanage and you managed to steal a small piece, it was delicious, tasted like heaven compared to all the tasteless food they gave you in that place.

Wanda settled on a chair and you kept your head hidden, but your eyes were locked on the man.

You thought you heard Wanda calling you, but your attention was entirely on that piece of food. The man seemed to take notice when he met your gaze and gave you a smirk. The eye contact would’ve made you shy away, but Wanda’s presence made you feel safe, so you held it.

“I think I know what she wants.” He spoke to Wanda. “Would you like a muffin Y/N?” He directed at you. You lifted your head from Wanda’s shoulder and, after a moment of hesitation, you nodded slowly.

He opened a cabinet and picked one up, handing it to you, offering a beaming smile. You stared at it for a second, not expecting him to give you a whole one. Your eyes darted from him to Wanda, looking for some sort of confirmation.

“It’s okay, take it.” She smiled at you encouragingly.

You slowly stretched your hand and grabbed the item.

“Fank you, siw.” You practically whispered.

“You can call me Sam.”

“Fank you, Mw. Sam.”

“Huh, Mr Sam, I can get used to that.” He joked. Or at least you thought he did, since now you were just blankly staring at the muffin, not really sure if you should really eat it, despite your stomach screaming for you to do so.

“Just call him Sam,” Wanda spoke to you, “and we can’t let her keep calling us that, Sam, she does it out of fear for disrespecting us.”

“Is that why she also hesitated from taking the muffin?” A new voice questioned.

“I don’t know Stark, maybe…” Wanda trailed off and you decided to help, since they were talking about you anyways.

“Fhey did not let us- let us eat out of meal time and-,” you took a breath trying to calm your nerves, “and thewe wewe too many kids so- so thewe was nevew enough food and- and,” your eyes went wide when you noticed everyone was staring at you intently and a whimper left your lips unconsciously before you shoved your face back into Wanda’s neck.

She rubbed your back in an attempt to calm you down and, surprisingly enough, it did. Something about her just made you so calm.

“You don’t have to worry about this here,” a man with glasses said, “we have plenty of food and no rules, you can have whatever you want whenever you want, just tell any of us and we’ll get it for you, deal?” You smiled at how nice they were being with you.

“Deal, siw.” You nodded.

“And call me Tony, please.” You nodded again.

“See, it’s fine, you're safe here.” Wanda reassured, giving you a kiss on your temple. The action caused a silly smile to grow on your lips and your cheeks to heat up, as you leaned into her chest.

“Oh, come on, seriously?” A man with the same accent as Wanda blurted. “She has known you for, what? 20 minutes? And she already has a crush on you.” His comment made laughter erupt around the kitchen, and, even though you didn’t understand what was so funny, you enjoyed the moment. Laughter was not common in the orphanage.

Throughout the rest of the day you started to feel more comfortable around everyone.

Wanda never left your side, or, you were the one who never left her side. Spending the rest of the evening watching movies on the most amazing TV room you had ever stepped foot on.

Other people would join you from time to time. Pietro, who you learned was Wanda’s brother; Natasha, or Nat as she preferred; Bucky; Sam; and Steve.

You couldn’t quite pinpoint when it was that you fell asleep. You just knew you were now in a room you had never seen before, it was pretty, but unfamiliar. You saw a stuffed animal left on the edge of the bed and clutched onto it, trying to get the images from the nightmare you just had out of your mind.

Several minutes passed and you were just too scared to even close your eyes. Sleeping alone was something you never did, the rooms in the orphanage were filled to the brim with precarious beds or improvised mattresses due to the excessive amount of kids there.

Deciding that you wouldn’t be able to sleep anymore, you climbed out of bed and made your way out of that room. Your feet automatically took you to another door down a big hall. You knocked softly, but got no response.

After three more tries, you turned the door knob and it opened. You put your head inside the room and detected a figure laying in a bed.

“Wanda,” you whisper shouted, trying to catch the woman’s attention, “Wandaaa.”

She stirred and lifted her head to look at you, her eyes were sleepy, but she managed to give you a tired smile.

“Hey Y/N, is something wrong? Do you need anything?”

“Can I- can I sleep with you?” Your gaze fell to the floor.

“Sure.” You smiled widely and ran towards her, climbing into the bed messily, since it was so ridiculously tall.

She laid on her back, opening her arms, and you took that as your chance to cuddle into her, wrapping your tiny limbs around her torso. She caressed your hair until you drifted to sleep.

The next morning you woke up still cuddled to Wanda. She was still fast asleep, and looked so peaceful you didn’t have the heart to move and risk waking her. Plus, you liked the proximity, the warmth from her body, her arm hugging you close.

A few minutes passed before she opened her eyes, only to be met by yours.

“Good mowning.”

“Good morning princess,” you giggled at the nickname, “wanna go down and get some breakfast?”

You nodded eagerly, already used this new environment, without the rigid rules and punishments. She climbed out of bed and made her way to the bathroom, you just sat up and watched as she washed her face or something. She then went through another door, which you assumed was where she kept her clothes since moments later she came back in different clothes.

She picked you up from the bed and took you into the kitchen. When she walked past the room, a confused expression grew on you.

“Whewe awe we going?”

“To the dining room, we usually have our breakfast there.”

“Oh, okay.”

And that was one breakfast table alright. All kinds of fruit, bread, cereal, cake, cheese and ham, and butter.

“Look who found our little runaway.” Tony commented, but you didn’t give him any attention, mesmerized by the amount of food.

“Yeah, she found her way into my room in the middle of the night.”

“Really? How?” Steve asked.

“Good question, hey, sweetie,” Wanda caught your attention and you turned to look at her, “how did you know which one was my room last night?” You shrugged.

“I just knew whewe to go.”

“Seems like some part of her memory is still intact.” Stark remarked with interest.

Wanda sat down, with you in her lap and started serving food on her plate. The rest of the room fell into light conversation as you all enjoyed breakfast.

Soon you were interrupted by Bruce.

“Guys, I’ve got results from the tests.”

“Do you know what happened?” Steve asked eagerly.

“Kind of, the smoke she inhaled during the mission was poisonous, it was supposed to kill her, but it seems like her cells reacted to it differently.” He explained. “Her shapeshifting abilities reacted with the poison causing her body to, well, change, in order to avoid dying.”

“My powews wewe able to bweak down the poisonous gas into hawmless pawticles.” You responded automatically.

Everyone was shocked at your statement, but you just kept on eating like nothing had happened, not understanding what they were so surprised about.

“Yes… precisely,” Bruce added, slowly, “and that took a toll on her own cells, turning off her powers momentarily, why she got stuck as her five year old self with no memories whatsoever of the rest of her life is unclear.”

“Can you turn her back?” Nat asked.

“I can try and find some serum that reverts her situation, but, by the looks of it, her body is doing it on its own.”

“She did remember her way to my room last night, and now this. It means her memory is coming back.”

“Can you predict how long it’ll take for her to come back to her own self?” Bucky urged.

“Not really, this is all new to me. Although if I had to take a hint, I’d say a couple of weeks at least.” The scientist answered.

“But she will come back, right?” Wanda sounded preoccupied, and it caught your attention.

“Relax sister, she’ll come back. And even if she doesn’t, she’s already in love with you again anyways.” Pietro teased.

“That’s not helping.” She teased back and tightened her hold on you.

A few days passed and, as expected, you were still stuck as a five year old. You would slip out little snippets of things from time to time, memories of things you’ve learned only when you were much older, but you still weren’t coming back.

After a while you fell into a routine. You would sleep with Wanda every night, watch movies with her and some of the other people in that place, Bucky and Sam would come up with the funnest games for you to play, Pietro would take you around the compound to help set pranks to play on the others.

You grew accustomed to the place and the people. The lack of excessive rules was relaxing. How nice everyone was to you. When Wanda would call you cute nicknames and get you all shy and flustered.

You were now watching Frozen for the fifth time that week, with Wanda by your side and Nat, Peter and Sam scattered around the TV room.

They found it adorable how you sang along to every song even though you didn’t know any of the lyrics. Peter and Sam had now countless videos on their phones of you doing all sorts of things just to mock you when you came back to your older self.

The movie was nearing the end, now on the scene where they were rushing Anna to the trolls to see if they could help keep her alive. You sang along to the song up until the moment where Anna collapsed from the spell Elsa threw on her.

At that moment you mindlessly turned to Wanda, the words seeping out of your mouth without your control.

“You bettew not die on ouw wedding.” Her eyes went wide with shock from the statement, which you didn’t notice.

“What?” She whispered, more to herself than to you.

“Yeah, well, I’m gonna mawwy you one day.” You gave her a smile and turned your attention back to the TV, unaware of what you had just said as a blush creeped around Wanda’s face.

When the movie ended, you chanted for you guys to watch it again, earning a groan from everyone. When a yawn escaped your lips, Wanda took that as her cue.

“C’mon, honey, you are tired, we can watch it again tomorrow.” She picked you up.

“Pwomise?” You gave her your puppy eyes.

“I promised.” She pecked your nose, earning a giggle from you.

You settled in her bed as you waited for her to shower and join you. You cuddled into her and drifted off to sleep.

You woke up feeling extremely weird, your muscles ached and your head was spinning a little. You kept your eyes closed as memories from the past days came back to you. The mission going wrong, you waking up in the med bay.

And then you remembered.

“Holy shit.” You whispered to yourself, careful not to wake Wanda.

You had spent the past week as a five year old. Every moment started to come back. You playing hide and seek with Sam and Bucky. That time you and Pietro showered Nat with glitter, and how she almost killed the boy later. Tony being a dad all the time, checking up if you needed anything and making funny faces to make you laugh. Steve carrying you around inside his shield.

And Wanda, always being there with you. Taking care of you. Watching the same movies all the time. Cuddling every night.

Your attention was caught by the woman stirring in bed next to you, still fast asleep. She had been so patient throughout the whole situation that you couldn’t help but smile.

You propped yourself up on one elbow, facing your girlfriend. You watched for a few minutes while she was fast asleep. Just appreciating how beautiful she was and how peaceful she looked. You were falling even more in love with her, if that was possible.

Not being able to hold yourself back any longer, you gave her a lingering kiss to her forehead, moving then to her cheek, leaving small pecks all the way. You then moved to her jaw and neck, inhaling her scent, as your free hand started to draw circles on her stomach.

You felt her breath changing, indicating she was no longer asleep and directed your lips to her ear.

“Good morning, my love,” you whispered softly, pecking her earlobe gently.

Her hands grabbed your cheeks and moved you up to face her, her expression one of full happiness.

“You’re back.” She whispered moments after, trying to convince herself that it was true.

“I’m back.” You leaned down to capture her lips in a long and passionate kiss, resting your forehead against hers’, “I love you.”

“I love you too,” she moved so she could stare into your eyes, “I missed you.”

“Why? I was here the whole time.” You teased.

“You know what I mean.” Your smile grew as you leaned in again, your lips meeting in another gentle kiss.

“At least we learned two things from this experience,” she eyed you with curiosity, “first, is that no matter what I’ll always be in love with you,” you referred to the crush five year old you had on her, and enjoyed as her cheeks turned bright red, “and second, is that you are great with kids.”

“I am, aren’t I.”

You spent hours in bed, cuddling, kissing and laughing at your childish antics from the past week.

That’s when you knew, you would marry that girl.

#wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff imagine #wanda maximoff #mcu #fluff #marvel

1K notes · View notes

seijuurouxryuu · 3 years

Text

regretti spagetti

Title: regretti spagetti Author: Shiro (TeitoxAkashi [AO3]/ seijuurouxryuu [tumblr]) Rating: Gen Pairing: Fon/Reborn Event: @khrrarepairweek Prompts: Bar/Restaurant AU | Secret/ Hidden Skillset Tags/Warnings: No Archive Warning

Day 3: Sun Day

From incorrect quote generator:

Reborn: So what’s for dinner?

Fon, staring at the food they just burnt: Regret.

AO3

"What's for dinner, Fon?" Reborn asked from the door as he put away his scarf, midway toeing off his socks. He didn't even finish his words when he smelled burning meat. He paused in his movement, hung the scarf back onto his neck and shuffled into the kitchen where Fon's back was facing him.

He moved closer and peered over his shoulders from his back.

"So... What's that." He deadpanned. Fon didn't even turn to him and said, "Regret."

Fon was fuming still even as he smiled at the waiter taking their order. Reborn would have been jealous if he weren't trying not to make the other person anymore furious than he already was. Their burnt pot had been just disposed, and Fon was angry that Reborn laughed at him.

In Reborn's defense, he had not expected Fon to say regret and he did not have time to hold it in.

Fon immediately stepped on his foot and gave him a silent treatment as they headed out—again for Reborn—for dinner at a nearby restaurant.

Once the waiter left, Reborn reached over and not so discreetly nudged Fon's finger, hooking their pinkies together. "Hey," He softly said. "I'm sorry for laughing. I wasn't laughing at you burning our dinner, you know?"

Fon remained silent, but he hadn't move away his hand as he looked out of the window with a slightly sulky look.

Reborn almost cooed at how cute Fon was being, but he had to hold it in. He had to coax his big baobei first, otherwise he would be sleeping on the couch tonight. He moved closer and nudged him. “Will you forgive me, baobei? I’ll do anything you say. I’ll even get you that Mapo tofu you loved so much.”

That gotten Fon’s attention as he gave Reborn a side squint. Reborn hated that stall’s Mapo tofu, saying that it stank too much and would be there for the whole month. Which is why even though Fon loved it so much, he never eaten it a lot. It was a sacrifice on his part, and Reborn did not appreciate it.

Fon was going to riot.

Reborn grimaced internally and pushed on. “For a month, no, two. You can eat it as many time as you like.”

“… Three.”

“… Fine. Anything you want, baobei.”

Fon finally turned around and gave him a smug, content smile. Reborn sighed in exasperation, but it was his fault in the first place so he relented. Besides, he loved how Fon looked so smug like that. He all but wanted to kiss him right there and then.

Just as he was going to give into his urge, the waiter came back with a huge grin. Reborn’s eyebrow twitched as he sat straight and stared expressionlessly as the waiter put down their meals.

“Here’s your steak, tropical fried rice, and chocolate mouse cake.” The cake was placed directly in front of Fon. Reborn’s trigger finger twitched instead.

Fon gave the waiter a confused look. “We didn’t order this cake.”

The waiter, ignorant to how Reborn had killed him in 101 different ways in his mind, winked at Fon and said with a purr. “On the house, my treat. You look like you deserve a treat.”

Fon laughed and nodded his thanks. He seemed to have understood what was going on, but he played along just to see Reborn riled up. He propped his elbows on the table and leaned his chin on his hand, smiling up. “Why, thank you. I had been hoping to eat this cake. I heard from my neighbours it’s the best in town and I thought by this time it’d have had been sold out.”

The waiter nodded, too pleased to have gain Fon’s attention. “It has. This is actually mine; I bought to treat myself for finishing my finals, but when I saw you, I knew I had to give it to you.”

“Oh? Congratulation! And that’s so sweet of you, but I can’t possibly take what you’ve been saving for yourself.”

“No, no. I insist. I really want you to try it. And…”

Before the waiter could continue with his bashful yet blatant flirt right in front of Fon’s murderous husband, Reborn picked up his fork and stabbed right into the cake. Both Fon and the waiter jolted and stare at him incredulously while he cut a giant piece out of the tiny slice of cake and shoved the whole thing into his mouth. And he obscenely moaned.

“It is good.” His voice was muffled around the cake as he chewed. He swallowed and then nodded. “Very good. Just a bit tad too sweet.” The waiter’s smile faltered slightly. Reborn did not stop and pointed at the cake while talking to Fon. “Do you want to try it now?”

Fon opened his mouth to speak, “I—" and ended up getting pulled by the neck towards Reborn and was furiously kissed, tongue pushing against his as he tasted the far too sweet chocolate from the other. He frowned and tried to push Reborn away, but the other wouldn’t let go so they ended up having a full blown make out session right in front of the waiter and other customers in the restaurant.

Turned as red as his favourite sweater, Fon bit Reborn’s tongue harshly. He tasted a little bit of blood as Reborn finally pulled away, both breathless and slightly more bothered than they should be in public.

Wordlessly, Fon socked a punch onto Reborn’s stomach as he huffed, picking up his coat and stomped out of the restaurant with headful of red.

Reborn hissed at the bite, licking his inner mouth at the taste of blood, and the punch. It didn’t hurt all that much since Fon wasn’t even that angry at him. His lips tugged into a feral but thirsty smile as he, too, picked up his coat and chased after Fon.

But not before giving the waiter a middle finger.

They didn’t even pay.

Reborn would have to pay tonight.

---------------------------

A/N: There is nothing to do with spagetti. Yes its a typo.

hfkdlsjflkdsj I was looking for inspiration for this day and the incorrect quote generator or whatever gave me that. And I took it. :DDDD

Baobei = baby/ babe in Mandarin Chinese :3

Reborn is such a piece of shit. I love him.

RIP Reborn tonight *wink wonk*

RIP the waiter even more but it's his own fault flirting with the wrong person.

AND OMG THEY ARE MARRIED :D

[I apologize for any grammar, spelling, etc. etc. misteaks] yes that is on purpose

#KHR #Katekyo Hitman Reborn #khrrarepairweek2021 #Fon #Reborn #My Writings

11 notes · View notes

jungledubs-archive · 3 years

Text

so i stuck will, luka, and grieson in an incorrect quotes generator...

Grieson: In my defense, I was left unsupervised. Luka: Wasn't Will with you? Will: In my defense, I was also left unsupervised.

Grieson, driving Luka and Will: So how was your day? Luka: We almost got surprise adopted! Grieson: What? Will: We almost got kidnapped. Grieson: Oh, okay.

Grieson: *slams on the breaks* WAIT WHAT?!

Grieson: We need a distraction. Luka: Is anyone here good at jumping up and down and making weird noises?

Will, whispering: My time has come

Grieson: Luka, what do IDK, LY, and TTYL mean? Luka: I don’t know, love you, talk to you later

Grieson: Ok, I love you too, I’ll just ask Will.

Grieson: Let me show you a picture from last night that really upset me Luka: Okay, but in my defense, Will bet me 50 cents I couldn’t drink all that shampoo. Grieson: That’s not what I wanted to- you drank SHAMPOO?!

Grieson: Who thinks I can fit 15 marshmallows in my mouth? Luka: You’re a hazard to society Will: And a coward. DO TWENTY.

Grieson: What's a word thats a mix between 'sad' and 'mad'? Luka: Disgruntled, miserable, desolated- Will: Smad.

Grieson: Sometimes I drink milk straight out of the container. Luka: The cow??? Grieson: What? Will: Luka, W H Y?

Luka, trying to ask Grieson out: Would you like to stay for dinner? Will: WOULD YOU LIKE TO STAY FOREVER?

Will: If you had to choose between Luka and all the money I have in my wallet, which would you choose? Grieson: That depends, how much money are we taking about? Luka: Grieson! Will: 63 cents. Grieson: I'll take the money. Luka: GRIESON!!!

Will: Would you stab your best friend in the leg for 10 million gold? Luka: You stab me, and then when my leg gets better, we buy a big-ass house. Grieson: You can stab me too, then we'll have 20 million. Luka: Good thinking.

Will: What did you do with Grieson's body? Luka: What didn’t I do with the body? Will: Luka: Okay, that sounded more sexual than I intended. I disposed of the corpse respectfully.

Will: So, what, now I’m just supposed to do anything that Luka does? I mean, what if they jumped off a cliff? Grieson: If Luka were to jump off a cliff, they would’ve done their due diligence regarding the height of the cliff, the depth of the water, and the angle of entry, so yes. If you see Luka jump off a cliff, by all means, jump off a cliff. Will: You jump off a cliff! Grieson: Gladly. Provided Luka did first.

Will: If I accidentally sat on a voodoo doll of myself, would I be trapped forever in that position, doomed to starve to death? Luka: How am I supposed to know? Grieson: You say, as if we don’t use you as a source of knowledge of the occult. Luka: *sighs* Luka: You wouldn't be trapped.

Grieson: Luka, keep an eye on Will today. They're going to say something to the wrong person and get punched. Luka: Sure, I’d love to see Will get punched. Grieson: Try again. Luka, sighing: I will stop Will from getting punched.

Grieson: Hey Luka, Luka: Yes? Grieson: Can a person breathe inside a washing machine while it’s on? Luka: Luka: Where’s Will?

Grieson: Here’s a fun Christmas idea. We hang mistletoe, but instead of kissing, you have to FIGHT whoever else is under it. Luka: Grieson no. Will: Mistlefoe. Luka: Please stop encouraging them.

Grieson: Luka and I were crossing the street, and this dude drove by and honked at us Will: *Sighing* What did Luka do? Grieson: They chased him to the next red light, then reached into his window and... Luka: Who wants a steering wheel?

Grieson: Fitness tip: never stop pushing yourself. Some say 8 hours of sleep is enough. Why not keep going? Why not 9? Why not 10? Strive for greatness. Luka: Next time you’re working out do 15 push ups instead of 10. Run 3 miles instead of 2. Eat a whole cake instead of just a slice. Burn your ex’s house down. You can do it. I believe in you. Will: There were so many mixed messages in that I can’t-

#slime speaks #golden #incorrect quotes

10 notes · View notes

thebigfour-ftw · 3 years

Text

Hey so I’m sure you guys might have noticed the schedule I just posted!

I found it really hard to use all of the characters I wanted to because there are SO many characters and I couldn’t keep track of them all. This way, I have a base to jump off of and will better utilize ALL of the characters at my disposal, instead of just the few I may focus on most.

This will encourage more content for minor/side characters and their relationships! I know a lot of people really wanted to see that so I hope this helps with that.

I’m also hoping it helps me space out my posts more so when I binge a bunch of incorrect quotes for content, I don’t post them all at once and then run out of content for ages after I burn out.

Cool that’s all! See you guys around :)

#update #not an incorrect quote

2 notes · View notes

starlightshore · 4 years

Note

Aaa! I am sorry about that (this is anarchy anon!) I don't remembr exactly what I wrote in the first ask but my main problem with anarchy, though the idea seems to be the best ideal way for society to function is that it leaves a power vacuum, and that I am not sure how it would be be solved. There are always assholes in the world and thst can't be ignored and it won't be solved in an easy way. Everytime anarachy has occurdd it has usually made a way for another equal or worse government to (1)

/under read more since this is gonna be lengthy O: sorry mobile users!

(2/2) brought up. And ... also I am not sure people have the kindness to do things without some kind of programs. While many lives will be the same without an institution governmental programs will not be funded to help cities to help schools to help those who need the help in general. The system is craptastic now but... in an anarachy system I just can see it getting worse. It has bright sides but I can't see it working.////////////

oh defs fair points! all systems have flaws and need trial and error to fix unless its so broken from the ground up it needs to be replaced -and i do believe capitalism is that broken. we didn’t start out with empires or huge states of government, humanity lived under anarchism before these governments and we can live so again. the issue is that we haven’t had a large scale and successful anarchist country that hasn’t been squashed by the state. (tho, the history of anarchy is more of a blind spot of mine, i would recommend talking with other anarchists on this topic lmao)

again, so like. capitalism is new. Civilization did not always rule like it does now, capitalism and our current systems are built off Feudalism. we can all agree feudalism is bonkers and awful, yeah? why are we so faithful to a system built off it by people who owned slaves and were wealthy and powerful? why do we trust its for the benefit of the common people when the 1% of the 1% horde most of the wealth in the world and most people in the US if you accurately measured them would be in poverty or near poverty? half of the nation would be considered poor. (and near poverty is still very bad. you’re one bad medical bill or career issue away from poverty, that’s a problem)

(quote taken from the wikipedia, heres the source it mentions)

our planet is dying, we’re dying. the poor are poorer and we can not live like this anymore. we need change, and we have to quick or we will literally all die. we have to have a extreme solution or we will have an extreme end.

i’m not advocating for looting streets or murder by guillotine obvs, our society is too raised on capitalism and regression to think of revolution right now. (hell, most people have an incorrect definition of what anarcy is, how do i expect people to adopt it?) i know i will not live long enough to see a just anarchist world, even if i think we should strive to try, as mentioned, we don’t have a choice under capitalism as the planet is dying. i mean. most people think anarchy means “to live without reason or order” when it really means to dispose of police states and flawed governmental systems.

so yeah, i know theres challenges with getting anarchy to work, and while ideally think we need to act fast and make the changes happen now, i know this takes time and being progressive through socialism -from smaller to greater reform like free education, stopping corporations from monopolies and polluting, giving workers rights and better pay, giving more political power to the people ect. can be achieved through the current system but i honestly think thats just as fantastical as creating a completely new system that doesn’t rely on a military state.

the system was created by rich people for rich people. working within it is a uphill battle that could just as easily fall right back or get worse with each new election. the elections themselves are designed by the ground up to keep power to those in power, we need imminent change.

no police, no armies, no private prisons, no inequality. i can’t expect this to be done or solved easily or quickly, but it is still something i can strive for and wish for.

also like... having police and our armies aren’t effective. its just control over the people and colonialism. the war on drugs was not effective, it worsened conditions of those who are addicts and has let generations of people unjustly criminalized and imprisoned. (and, shocker, its racist. its mainly targeted towards marginalized people, specifically black the most.) addiction is a mental health issue, it shouldn’t be treated as a serious offense for decades in prison.

in addition, police are largely left unchecked with power and the whole police system is rigged to keep abusive and exploitative people with jobs and guns.

so yeah power vacuums would be difficult, and we do need universal laws to protect people, but if we’re all working together to govern ourselves and create a society that helps the poor, those in any need, the world will be better. under capitalism, this can never be fully achieved.

#personal stuff #---#-----#-------#----------#politics #police brutality #ask to tag #Anonymous

5 notes · View notes

gotham-city-tales-blog · 6 years

Text

Edward Nygma Imagine: "For Now"

Requests: (1) Could you do an imagine about Edward Nygma being too shy to talk to you so he sends anonymous letters and one day you catch him dropping them off? (2) Hello, is it cool if you write a fic where the reader is just hired to work in the records annex and one day she's doing work while dancing and singing to herself and Ed catches her and just watches her in the doorway!! (3) Okay so I’ve literally never requested anything before but could I please request a season 1 Ed x Reader? Maybe something like the reader is a flirt and thinks Ed’s cute and he doesn’t really know how to react? (4) Could you make an Edward Nygma imagine where the reader catches him in the act of disposing of the body of Tom or Kristen? [by anon & anon & anon]

Summary: an unrequited love story is resolved when you help Ed cover up one of his earliest murders.

One night while you were working late with Lee, she ran to get coffee. Alone in the office, you turned on your radio and let your hair down for a bit. You were an assistant to Lee an tonight was inventory night. The both of you would be pulling an all-nighter to document every scalpel and pill, re-file cases as cold and so on.

With a night full of administrative duties, you were both fading fast. So you forked over the cash and Lee went on the coffee run.

Pushing at the window which had been painted shut a long time ago, it opened outward just enough for you to look below at the city streets. The radio hummed in the background, the offices of the precinct silent for the night. As you looked down and out the window, you saw taxis driving by, honking their horns relentlessly. People were shouting from far away and the lights were still bright against the late night sky.

Walking across the room, you pulled a cigarette from the pocket of your jacket. Swaying your head to the music, you hummed along to the melody as you lit your bog and turned up the music.

Embracing your few moments of freedom, you swayed and hummed to the music as you subconsciously dragged on your cigarette, listening to the notes of the music dripping like honey over the distant city noises.

Edward stood and watched you all those nights ago. He watched your lips exhale the smoke and your lips purse, he focused on how your hair fell over your shoulders and back again as you move your body to the beats. Your long skirt swayed effortlessly between your legs and around your graceful feet.

From that night on, he was captivated by you-everything about you.

Every three or four days a letter awaited you at your desk outside the coroner’s office. It had been happening for about three weeks but you hadn’t told anyone-well, except Lee. She saw them every morning, she always got to work early.

They weren’t long, just a simple quote or a picture of a famous painting. It was always something of simple intrigue that made your day. Small notes tucked away in mini envelopes. Occasionally a heart adorned them, sometimes a dove an then sometimes nothing.

You still didn’t know who was sending them but that didn’t mean you wouldn’t keep looking.

You had suspected either Gordon or Nygma but eventually concluded it was neither.

You were friendly and men tended to take that the wrong way. Always making the assumption you were a flirt, many of the men in blue had made advances. But you weren’t flirting. You were just being nice, making conversation. Gordon was the only officer you assumed capable of such a subtle and sweet act, but after much deliberation you decided you were incorrect.

Gordon was too smart to mistake your kindness, besides, you were close with Lee. Jim could be obtuse, but never on purpose. He wasn’t a deliberate fire starter.

You had hoped maybe Edward was behind it but eventually decided against it.

When you started at the GCPD, you had instantly clicked with Ed. Seeing as you both worked closely on cases, a lot of time was spent in each other’s vicinity. You bantered back and forth, exchanging jokes and riddles. You loved spending time with him but he never made any kind of move or reference to the notes you were receiving anonymously.

So, despite your hopes, you moved on with your little investigation and remained by Ed’s side as a loyal friend.

What you didn’t know was that every single day Edward was falling deeper and deeper in love with you.

He saw how all of the men looked at you. They admired you and could woo you, they could literally sweep you off your feet-him, not so much. He saw how you spoke with them, paying them attention and laughing at their jokes. Your smile was so relaxing and appeared with such ease.

The relationship between you both was effortless and he wouldn’t do anything to risk you. You’d complained about men and their unwanted advances before-he didn’t want to become another creep on that list.

Everyday he worked with you he wanted to tell you how he felt, he wanted to scream it from the roof tops. But he felt he couldn’t compare. So he grinned and bared it, expressing his compassions anonymously and remaining by your side as a loyal companion.

That loyalty was eventually tested.

After working late one night and locking up after Lee, you stumbled upon Edward Nygma, drenched in blood, pushing a body into his trunk.

You parked across the street from the precinct in order to avoid any awkward run-ins with flirty policemen. Crossing an alley you of course recognized Ed, but only by his appearance.

Already nervous, upon seeing you he became manic.

He didn't approach you instead try to convince you not to run, but never once inching closer to you.

You knew Ed. You trusted him. So you waited.

When you didn't argue he stammered on in your silence explaining how this was a dirty officer. He found him stalking women, five including you.

He had hurt one of them and Ed confronted him but all he did was try and hurt Edward.

So Edward killed him.

No, not the most rational thing. But this was Ed.

So you helped him in a haze.

“I-Is your place safe?” Your words were coming out quick, you weren’t even processing what you were saying. “We can go back to my place but people could see us-and oh God the blood, what if-”

“We can go to my apartment.” He gently silenced your rambling with his suggestion. “No one will see us, I’ll make sure.” His words were confident, his tone soft. He was scared for you. He couldn’t tell what you were thinking, of him, of yourself, your job or the law. He was in the dark as you silently rode back to his abode next to him.

As he drove, you remained silent, processing everything you had just witnessed and taken a part in. As you stared out the windshield, the lights passing in gleams, a small note on the dashboard stood out to you.

Tucked between the dashboard and the air vent, a small white envelope was crumpled slightly, caught on a jagged comer of the beat up car frame. A minuscule read heart adorned the sealed note and you leaned forward to pull it out of its hiding spot.

Edward watched you carefully, only peeking at the road. He couldn’t see what you were looking at but he could tell that it had you captivated. He swallowed hard and his eyes shot forward as you sat back in your seat with the letter in hand.

“Were they... from you?” Your voice was quiet as your stomach flipped and a small smile ghosted over your features.

“Y-Y-Yes.” He stammered quietly, knowing there was no point in denying it from here. His gloved hands fiddled with the steering wheel as he kept his gaze forward.

“These have made the mornings very exciting for the passed few weeks.” You giggled as you thumbed the note between your fingers.

"Y-You're not bothered by them?" His surprise wasn't masked. "O-Or that they're from me?"

"No, of course not." Your voice was low but it was steady.

Ed slowly came to a stop, pulling his car to the side of the road. Slowly turning to you, he cautiously took your hand in his own.

" I am so sorry for getting you involved in this. I understand if you want to turn me in. All I ask is that you give me enough time to get away." His voice was strained and quiet but his words were sure. He did not look you in the eyes but rather at the hand of yours he was still holding carefully.

"Just promise me your life was in danger." You said as you held his hand tighter.

"It was." And he looked you in the eye.

And that was the truth-about tonight at least.

"Then just take me home and stay with me tonight, don't leave me alone." You whispered.

"Okay. Well be safe at my place." He smiled as he uncertainly pressed a kiss to your cheek.

"You missed!" You proclaimed as you swiftly took him by the neck and kissed him softly.

#edward nygma #ed nygma #ed nygma imagine #ed nygma x reader #ed nygma fanfic #the riddler #riddler imagines #riddler x reader #riddler imagine #edward nygma imagine #edward nygma imagines #edward nygma x reader #edward nygma fanfiction #gotham #gotham fanfic #gotham imagines #gotham fanfiction #gotham imagine

512 notes · View notes

starcchild · 2 years

Text

((no one asked but I wanted to do some incorrect quotes with just Carter before I go to bed so here y'all go sdfgjhsfdgjh

Carter: I tried to write ‘I'm a functional adult’ but my phone changed it to ‘fictional adult’ and i feel like that’s more accurate.

——–

Carter: I'm naturally funny because my life is a joke.

——–

Carter: Is this a good idea? Carter: Probably not. Carter: Do I care? Carter: No.

——–

Carter: I scare people a lot because I walk very softly and they don't hear me enter rooms. So when they turn around, I'm just kind of there and their fear fuels me.

——–

Carter: Sometimes I get so caught up on being gay that I forget I’m actually bi.

——–

Carter: So, according to my university, it is, quote, “my responsibility if there is an internet outage to contact the faculty and the department.” Carter: Now, if you’re a critical thinker like me, you might be wondering one thing. Carter: HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO EMAIL THE DEPARTMENT?!?!?!

——–

Carter: You know the sound a fork makes in the garbage disposal? That's the sound that my brain makes all the time.

——–

Carter, opening a Capri Sun: Guess I'll drink my sorrows away.

——–

Carter: I have met some of the most insufferable people. But they also met me.

——–

Carter: I wish I was a cat, but not in a furry kinda way, more like a “I can sleep all day and hit people with no consequences” kinda way.

——–

Carter: The risk I took was calculated but, man, am I bad at math.

——–

Carter: I like to play this game called nap roulette. I take a nap and don’t set an alarm. Will it be 20 min or 4 hours? Nobody knows. It’s risky and I like it.

——–

Carter: Sometimes, I don’t realize an event was traumatic until I tell it as a funny story and notice everyone is staring at me weird.

——–

Carter: Well, needless to say. Uh-oh Spaghetti-os.

——–

Carter: Like, no offense to myself and all, but what the fuck am I actually doing?

——–

Carter: I dunno if I'm ready to process the ramifications of this bullshit.

——–

Carter: You can't wake up if you never got to sleep.

——–

Carter: Am I a boy? Am I a girl? It doesn't matter. I'm going to burn your house down.

——–

Carter: I don’t think the therapist is supposed to say ‘wow’ that many times during their first session with a client, but here we are.

——–

Carter: I regret getting dragged into your heterosexual tomfoolery.

——–

Carter: I only have two emotions: exhaustion and stress. And I’m somehow always feeling both simultaneously.

——–

Carter: God has let me live another day and I'm going to make it everyone's problem.

——–

Carter: Does anyone know how to relax? Asking for a friend.

——–

Carter, explaining why they are not allowed to cook: I put the noodles in the pot and put the pot on the stove and turned the burner on high. Turns out you don't put noodles in marijuana and I almost burnt the whole house down.

——–

Carter: I think my guardian angel drinks.

——–

Carter: I'm a nice person, but I'm about to start throwing rocks at people.

#incorrect quotes

1 note · View note

nessaiscute · 7 years

Conversation

Caleo incorrect angst quote

Calyspo Annabeth and Piper have infltrated Rosa's palace stole her treasure and are working on leaving wit hit

??: Lets go lets go, Rosa go!

A book comes out of nowhere knocking the treasure out of all three of their hands

Piper: What?

Rosa flips into sight grabbing the treasure cognitive Calypso wraps her arms around Rosa

Rosa: I won't let anyone take this!

Rosa: This proves i'm the queen of this castle, it is the core of this world

Calypso: That rat bitch.... thats how she sees me isn't it?

Piper: Yo Pervert! You waiting to ambush us?

Rosa: I just made it easier to find you. I'll dispose of you myself right here right now

Piper: Thats our line you sexually harassing d-bag!

Rosa: What a selfish misunderstanding

Calypso: How is it a misunderstanding?? you were doing things you kept in secret from others!

Rosa: The people around me were the ones who kept it secret. Adults who want me to endorse in my fame. Students who have the drive to become Authors. They willingly protect me so that we all may profit from it

Piper: 0___0 Profit

Rosa: There are too many imbeciles who don't understand that

Rosa: Including Naive brats like you and that Hispanic fuck who tried to kill himself

Calypso: *looks down* True, hes a total idiot. Letting you manipulate him. Trying to commit suicide.....

Calypso: And I'm even more of a dumb fuck for not realizing that.

Calypso: No matter what kind of fool someone might be.... They don't need your permission to live their lives!

Rosa: Drop the attitude you titan fuck! There is no wrong with using my gifts for my gain. I'm a cut above all other humans

Calypso: Above?? You mean beneath! You're a titans's damn demon obsessed with your sick desires

Rosa: *laughs* thats right, i'm not like you

Rosa: *wraps arm around Cognitive Calypso* I am the demoness that rules this world!!

#Caleo #Persona 5 #crossover #incorrect quote

2 notes · View notes

mbtizone · 7 years

Text

Hanna Marin (Pretty Little Liars): ESFP

Dominant Extroverted Sensing [Se]: When we first meet Hanna, she has secured the position of Rosewood High’s Queen Bee. Hanna can sometimes engage in reckless, impulsive behavior, such as shoplifting and excessive drinking. Hanna enjoys life’s sensory pleasures and can be a bit materialistic. She loves high fashion so much that she makes a career out of it. Hanna isn’t preoccupied with worrying about the future – she prefers to live in the present. Hanna is unafraid to take charge in situations. When she finds a gun in her mom’s closet, she instinctively takes it, brings it with her to a party and tries to dispose of it, only to be caught by the police. She doesn’t spend a lot of time thinking about what she’s going to do – she just does it. Hanna picks up on cues in her environment and is able to draw conclusions from the data she collects, such as when she is able to sense something off between Aria and Mr. Fitz in class.

Auxiliary Introverted Feeling [Fi]: Though Hanna doesn’t spend a lot of time talking about her feelings, she does act on them. If she’s feeling emotional about something, she tends to express it through her impetuousness. She doesn’t want to see a therapist and doesn’t like to open up about her emotions, opting to act out during times of stress instead. Even though Hanna is popular, she dislikes when people are cruel to those they deem inferior. When Mona attacks Lucas, Hanna defends him, because not so very long ago, Hanna was a social outcast just like he was, so she is able to identify with him. Hanna and Mona didn’t like being treated that way, so why is it okay for them to tease others? It’s hypocritical. To Mona, popularity is the most important thing, but Hanna cares about decency and kindness. Though material possessions are very important to Hanna, she decides to sell her clothes and handbags online in order to get some extra money when her mom begins to struggle financially. Hanna tends to present herself the same way no matter who she’s with. Hanna is who she is and she doesn’t adjust her behavior or her demeanor to suit others. What you see is what you get. She doesn’t typically care about keeping things harmonious – if she has a problem with you, she’ll let you have it…

Tertiary Extroverted Thinking [Te]: … and when she does let you have it, she doesn’t hold back. She’ll be very straightforward and direct. When Hanna picks up on something, she can usually comes up with a snappy one-liner to bring it to the attention of others. She tends to notice a lot and enjoys passing comments about the things she observes. Hanna is very witty, fierce, and has no problem diving right into things (Se-Te). Hanna doesn’t normally back down in any situation. When she wants something, she goes after it without inhibition. If there’s something she needs to do, Hanna will get it done (Se-Te). She doesn’t take in knowledge for fun. When she seeks out information, there’s usually a specific reason.

Inferior Introverted Intuition [Ni]: Because Hanna lives in the here and now, she doesn’t usually think about consequences or worry about how she’s going to achieve things. She doesn’t really plan for the future and tends to take things as they come. Hanna can sometimes jump to incorrect conclusions. When she notices that Aria is down, she assumes that she’s hung up on a guy back in Iceland. She follows her intuitive judgments, which at times, can be accurate, but are often a bit misguided. Hanna isn’t great at picking up on subtext or looking beyond the surface, but every once in a while, she is able to see what’s really going on. When Hanna does realize her dreams, she becomes so determined to achieve them that her personal life suffers as a result. Her focus on furthering her fashion career cost her her relationship with Caleb.

Enneagram: 7w8 Sx/So Note: I ALWAYS see Hanna typed as a 6w7, which really surprises me. Sixes tend to be committed, anxious, and responsible, whereas sevens are impulsive, pleasure-seeking, and impatient, which sounds a lot more like Hanna to me. She’s also assertive and unafraid of confrontation. I just don’t really see many six traits in her, but I know Type 6 seems to be the general consensus for Hanna.

Quotes:

[the girls know that Jenna can see, and discussing what to do about it]

Hanna: I say we push a table in front of her and see what she does. Spencer: Hanna, you have all the subtlety of a hand grenade. Hanna: [Not getting the sarcasm] Thank you.

Emily: I think what Hanna means is- Hanna: No, Hanna knows what Hanna means.

Tom Marin: You’re a good girl, Hanna. You’ve always been a good girl. You can get a little overenthusiastic. I remember you as a great tree-climber. The problem was, you’d sometimes need some help to get back down.

Hanna: Yeah, and framing her for a murder. So what am I supposed to do now, nothing? I mean, if Mona didn’t put that phone in the casket, then who did? And who sent that tape of us outside of Wilden’s car? And who stole Mona’s hate-mobile? Melissa? Jenna? Shana? Aria: You could always go ask her yourself. Aria: Hanna? I wasn’t serious. Han- Hanna: Hey! You saving that seat for your gal pal Jenna? Shana: Excuse me? Hanna: Don’t act like you haven’t heard that name before. Jen-na. Why’d you skip wilden’s funeral? Aria: Hanna- Hanna: Jenna was there, why weren’t you? You three were all buds, right? Where were you yesterday?! Shana: I was at swim practice. But I don’t recall signing a contract that said I had to report that to you. Aria: Okay, Hanna, let’s go- Hanna: So swimming laps is more important than saying goodbye to an old friend? Shana: What old friend? Hanna: The groggy scumbag you and Jenna scraped off of the road the night he was hit by a car. Aria: Hanna, come on.

Hanna: I always hated biology. I mean who cares how a cell divides, it just does.

Aria: “Unable are the loved to die for love is immortality.” Hanna: That’s creepy. Aria: It’s Emily Dickinson. Hanna: I don’t care if it’s Santa Claus, considered me creeped.

Hanna: Look, I have already gotten busted for stealing sunglasses and my boyfriend’s car. Spencer: Wait, you stole sunglasses? From who? Hanna: Not from a person, from a store. God, I have some class.

Hanna: Meredith? Her name is Meredith. Ew. That’s not even a cute girl name. I’m seeing big pores and mousy roots. Spencer: Hanna, I think it’s a little too soon to joke. Hanna: I’m sorry, but if you’re going to cheat, you might as well do it with somebody who deep-conditions her hair occasionally. Spencer: Here [passing Hanna a bagel], put something in your mouth besides your foot.

Aria: Hanna stop eating so much Hanna: Why? Aria: Because… Just don’t eat it, it could be poisoned… Just like Charles poisoned us Hanna: I don’t care, I’m hungry.

Hanna: You don’t know the first thing about me. Caleb: No, you don’t know the first thing about you.

Mona: If you and I start slipping up, we’re going to be right back at the bottom again. Hanna: Yeah. Well, I’m starting to think I’ve lost a few things on the climb up.

Ashley: Hanna, compassion. Hanna: I have it, just not in the morning.

Hanna: I’m gonna pick out my college, the same way I pick out my clothes. From a catalog.

Hanna: I have enough daddy-issues of my own. I can’t deal with having issues about hers too.

Hanna: Spencer, stop giving us orders. We’re not your winged monkeys.

Hanna Marin (Pretty Little Liars): ESFP was originally published on MBTI Zone

#7w8 #Hanna Marin #PLL #Pretty Little Liars #Sx/So #ESFP #mbti #mbti types #mbti personality types #fictionalcharactermbti #fictionmbti #enneagram #enneatypes #enneagram type #Type 7 #enneagram 7 #tv mbti

11 notes · View notes

notedlosangeles · 4 years

Text

About Big Mikes Miami Movers Co - Deals In And Near Miami, Fl

The Of Top Miami Movers - Flatrate Moving: Miami Moving Company

Table of ContentsThe smart Trick of Top 10 Best Moving Companies In Miami Fl - Angie's List That Nobody is DiscussingThe Buzz on Miami Movers For Less - Affordable Florida Moving CompanyExcitement About Miami Movers For Less - Affordable Florida Moving CompanySome Known Incorrect Statements About Top Miami Movers - Flatrate Moving: Miami Moving Company The 20-Second Trick For 11 Best Movers In Miami, Fl - ConsumeraffairsHow Movers In Miami, Fl - Two Men And A Truck can Save You Time, Stress, and Money.

youtube

If you are trying to find a worry-free moving experience in South Florida, you have actually pertained to the ideal location! At FlatRate, we totally comprehend the challenges you face when moving, and make it our company to strive at every stage of the process so you experience The Perfect Move.

Positive: Punctuality, Quality, Responsiveness, ValueEric and Mario were absolutely excellent, skilled, kind and patient. Best experience I have had with the company. Would recommend to everyone. Super happy with their work !!.

If you or your family is preparing to move to or from Miami during COVID-19, you can count on All My Children Moving & Storage! We offer fully personalized and extensive moving services that cover every step of the moving process, and we are doing it all safely, by practicing social distancing and wearing masks. Moving Company Miami.

All My Children Moving & Storage is prioritizing the safety of our customers and employees. We know that times are challenging right now, and we need to all come together to get through. We are working with the guidelines set by the CDC and WHO to make sure that all moves are done safely.

The Main Principles Of Top Miami Movers - Flatrate Moving: Miami Moving Company

We are also making sure to maintain a 6-foot distance from each other and our customers while moving. Our Miami movers have two decades of experience moving thousands of clients to and from the Miami area, and we've received hundreds of positive reviews from our faithful clients. Moving Company Miami. At All My Children Moving & Storage, our goal is to make your next move as hassle-free as possible.

All My Children Moving & Storage of Miami is locally-owned and operated. Our team of professional movers are headed by our operations manager, Rene Fernandez. In addition to supporting the Miami Dolphins, we also work with community outreach all around Miami, including supporting and partnering with St. Jude Children's Medical facility.

Call us today to get a totally free quote! Are you planning relocation in the Miami area? The local Miami movers at All My Children Moving & Storage can satisfy any of your needs. We provide extensive and personally tailored moving services. After your first call, our completely certified and insured moving professionals will begin crafting a customized that fits your budget plan and needs. Moving Company Miami.

Our fully-licensed and insured team of moving professionals deal with every move with the knowledge and family-friendly service our clients have concerned expect. Our goal at All My Children is to make your upcoming move as hassle-free as possible, so we're devoted to guaranteeing every move we perform goes smoothly and efficiently.

Examine This Report on 25 Best Movers - Miami Fl - Homeadvisor Reviews And Costs

Nobody understands the Miami location much better than All My Boys. Whether you're crossing the street or throughout the city, our Miami moving specialists have you covered! Our group of movers and moving trucks can move you throughout the nation, whether no matter the range! All My Boys likewise supplies global moving services! If you require storage area in the past, throughout or after your approaching relocation, All My Boys has you covered! We provide temperature-controlled storage systems to all of our devoted consumers.

That's why All My Boys Moving & Storage of Miami uses our thorough moving options that can cover every action of the moving procedure for you, from start to end up. Our group of Miami moving specialists have more than 20 years of experience and concentrate on every element of the moving procedure.

Whether you're moving into a high-rise, home, townhouse or apartment, our property and business movers will do the job! Our Miami movers take every preventative measure to guarantee your personal belongings are managed securely and thoroughly, and we will make certain no damage will be done to your old or brand-new house - Piano Movers Miami.

Contact All My Boys Moving & Storage of Miami to read more about our thorough moving services and to get a complimentary price quote for your upcoming property or business relocation (movers around Miami). We understand how demanding moving can be, so our objective is to make your moving experience as carefree as possible. Piano Movers Miami.

5 Simple Techniques For We Are Open! - Top Rated Movers In Miami - All My Sons ...

Big Mikes Miami Movers Co

Address: 40 SW 13th St, Miami, FL 33130, United States Phone: 305-573-1443 Email: [email protected] Our Website

We treat all of our clients' belongings as if they were our own and with the utmost care, and All My Children Moving & Storage assurances that your move will be performed smoothly and efficiently. If you have any questions about your upcoming Miami move or would like a totally free quote, call us today! All My Children Moving & Storage are the leaders in Miami.

The best planning makes all the difference! We know that every industrial move is distinct, and during your first call we can begin working on a moving plan that fits your company's needs. All My Children will plan and orchestrate every aspect of your move, including packing and disassembly services.

No matter your needs, All My Children Moving & Storage is here to assist with your next industrial move - Moving Company Miami. No move is too big or too small for our industrial Miami movrs. Call us today to receive a totally free quote and to find out more about our extensive industrial moving services! All My Children Moving & Storage of Miami has everything you need for your upcoming move.

Our full list of packing and include small, medium and large cardboard boxes, specialized and compartmentalized containers for delicate or delicate items like glasses, packing tapes, bubble wrap, packing tapes, as well as quilt pads and furniture covers for sofas, coffee tables, chairs and more! We also guarantee extra care for any unique or valuable items including antiques and artwork. Miami Movers.

The smart Trick of Miami Movers For Less - Affordable Florida Moving Company That Nobody is Talking About

Our professional moving consultants will supply you with packing guides and a personalized checklist to help make the packing process easier and more efficient. Call All My Sons Moving & Storage of Miami today to learn more about our packing services and packing supplies and receive a free estimate for your upcoming move!.

Abe Raksin, the owner, is wonderful - Miami Movers. His wife Raquell originally answered and was just lovely. Abe came with an assistant Donny. I want to thank Angie's List for the first company you emailed to me for excellent service removing many items from my house to be disposed of on 5/31 by Abe.

From the first word she spoke, i just knew i was in good hands, which never wavered. The other companies given would not even give me a moment of their time, Abe, Raquell, and Donny worked very well together courteous, helpful beyond words. They remained polite, thoughtful, and careful with all of my items.

I wanted to give them more than a 15% tip even before the came because they handled everything from the first word to the last with such kindness and professionalism. If they would have me again, I would use them in a heartbeat and would not hesitate to provide leading acknowledgment that is well been worthy of.

An Unbiased View of Miami Movers - Deals In And Near Miami, Fl - Groupon

Typically, it costs about $700 to move a two-bedroom house in Miami. Prices structures are primarily dependant on whether the relocation is regional or long-distance. Other elements consist of the scope of the relocation, the season you're moving and if you are moving large or valuable products. The moving business you employ must offer more information in their quote and suggestions to keep things economical.

#Big Mikes Miami Movers Co #movers miami #movers in miami #moving miami #movers to miami #moving in miami #moving company miami fl #moving company miami florida #flat rate movers miami #miami movers for less #best moving company miami #pro movers miami #miami beach moving company #moving company miami beach #preferred moving company miami

0 notes

biofunmy · 5 years

Text

Years Ago, My Sister Vanished. I See Her Whenever I Want.

“Don’t worry,” reads the cover photo of my sister’s Facebook page. “Everything is going to be amazing.”

The words, in neon blue, green and red, glow from the screen as a kind of preternatural promise, a message from beyond. When I’m feeling stressed, I click on her profile, gaze at that image and take a deep breath.

People leave notes, messages and pictures on her page. They say, “I miss you,” “I love you” and “I’m thinking about you.” They can’t leave flowers, but they do leave animated hearts.

Sometimes they even travel through time by responding to a comment of hers from years before, and a certain magic is created — the conversation extending across a bridge of years, transcending her absence. The page facilitates a continuation, an afterlife.

On Facebook, my sister’s words are preserved, frozen like a photograph. And her photographs remain, too, marking the stages of her young life. You can view them chronologically, scrolling to see a giggling girl in a pink Patagonia fleece become an 18-year-old model with a disposable camera and a goofy smile.

You can watch her tan legs grow long, her hair become blonder and curled, her freckles scatter into constellations across her nose. You can see the seed of rebellion sprouting into an idea, her green eyes alive and wild.

Every so often I click on the videos tab and watch as she and a friend drive through a tollgate with incorrect change. I listen (again and again) as my sister laughs. The video is grainy and absurd, and it’s difficult to distinguish faces, but her laugh is distinct, ringing out my favorite sound, throaty and extravagant.

I used to call my sister’s phone when she first disappeared. I knew she wouldn’t answer — the signal had vanished the moment she had — but the voice mail was intact. When I needed to hear her voice, I would dial her number and she would tell me to leave a message.

Occasionally, I did. I would tell her about my day or ask where she was. Other times I would cry, my silence following the beep.

I used to text her number too. Technology allowed me to continue that casual correspondence like a widower might speak to a gravestone. I kept her up with the Kardashians, told her what colleges I had applied to, related gossip from our high school and the details of our parents’ separation. I told her crazy things, ridiculous things, things you only tell your older sister.

The messages were automatic, reflexive, a mode of self comfort. Until one night, while out with friends at an Irish pub in Boston, I received a reply.

At that point, it had been two years since the frigid January night when she took a taxi to the foot of Philadelphia’s Benjamin Franklin Bridge. Two years since my parents sat with detectives, viewing security camera photos that showed her walking toward the bridge’s high point in her red North Face jacket but not continuing. Two years since the searches for any trace of her came up empty.

My family never officially proclaimed her deceased, but the reality settled in our stomachs like the dust that fell upon her untouched bedroom.

When my iPhone buzzed at the bar in Boston and her name appeared on the black screen, I was so startled that I dropped it, my hands instantly slick and my heart racing.

I was a freshman in college then and hadn’t told my new friends about my sister. It was easier to say I was an only child than to reveal the complicated truth.

At the pub that night, a band was playing my sister’s favorite song, so I had texted: “I miss you.”

That’s when her name appeared, with the message: “Who is this?”

I rushed to the bathroom and made it into a stall, where I collapsed onto a toilet seat, thinking, “She’s alive. She’s alive.”

Shaking, I pressed the call button.

“Hello?” a voice said. It was a female voice but deeper than my sister’s, older. The woman explained that she had been given the number with her new cell plan.

My roommates found me sobbing in the stall, mourning a new kind of loss. They guided me out past a well-meaning stranger at the sink who said, “Whoever he is, he’s not worth the tears. Trust me.”

I wanted to say, “He is a she, and, trust me, she’s worth it.”

I told my friends the truth that night, though it’s a truth I have struggled to face myself.

After all, if I could still see her, hear her and text her, was she really gone? If Facebook reminded me annually of her birthday and calculated the passing years into her current age, then her death wasn’t a period or an end but more of an ellipsis, and I could still imagine the “…” of a chat bubble popping up at any moment.

When someone you love disappears, there’s no finality of an autopsy report or the closure of a funeral. All you have is a lack of presence. You can piece together the mystery like in the Nancy Drew books you used to devour, but there’s no memorial service to confirm the truth. And that’s the problem: The promise of possibility, however faint, is harsher than any certainty.

It has now been five years since her disappearance, and I still fantasize about an alternate outcome. That senseless hope is hard to smother, the off-chance that someday I may see her face in a crowd, as familiar as my own reflection. I’ll run toward her and save her this time.

I have this dream a lot, intruding on other dreams, bullying them, demanding to be heard. Several years ago, my mother suggested we delete my sister’s Facebook account, wondering if it was inappropriate, the way her online life is paused with her random thoughts and photos on public display.

Ultimately, we decided not to. It brings me too much comfort.

As the years pass — I am now the age she was when she disappeared — I have come to know her better from the quotes she posted in her bio, the songs she cued in her iPod, the comments she left on her friends’ photos. It’s like getting to know someone through glimpses in a window, but it’s better than nothing.

And yet, I understand my mother’s view. There’s something indecent about holding on to social media. It’s so alive, so casual, so improper. There are screenshots of FaceTime conversations, selfies, profane jokes, a picture of her asleep with a friend’s Chihuahua.

Recently I read about the development of chatbots that can imitate human speech patterns. The technology is being considered as a way to facilitate bereavement, allowing us to communicate with loved ones through text messages. Using personal data and old messages, the bots can respond like your father, grandmother or sister. They can use your loved ones’ favorite phrases and dialectic habits. They can say, “I miss you, too.”

With such sophisticated technology, the question is no longer what’s possible but what’s morally permissible. In the gray area between preservation and personality theft, there is a danger of too much holding on and not enough letting go.

Memorials never feel like enough to the grief-stricken — never big enough or grand enough to commemorate the people we lose. Technology may get us closer, replicating faces and voices with alarming accuracy, but it will inevitably fall short.

These days, there are fewer friends posting on my sister’s page, not as many hearts. As Instagram surges and Facebook recedes, I wonder how long her page will remain active. It’s sad to think that interest in my sister may depend on the relative popularity of a social media platform.

For now, the photos keep her memory vivid, and I like the solidarity of knowing when others think of her and how they express that love. With absence comes forgetting, and Facebook helps me remember what I cannot bear to lose.

On her page, her essence remains. The way she extended her words with too many vowels, “I miss you” becoming “I miiiiiiis youuuu!!!” The bright colors of her crochet top. The fuchsia she painted her nails one summer. A picture of us on Cape Cod, my gangly knees resting on her tan shoulders at sunset.

I can see the scar on her lower lip from when she fell out of her bedroom window, sneaking out to a high school party. I can see her nose scrunched up as she readies herself to tell a joke.

Facebook cannot mimic my sister’s flowery handwriting, remind me how she smelled when wearing her favorite perfume or hug me the way she used to. But it can preserve the post she left on my wall six years ago that reads, “I love you.”

Sometimes, that’s enough.

Kyleigh Leddy is a senior at Boston College.

Modern Love can be reached at [email protected].

To hear Modern Love: The Podcast, subscribe on iTunes or Google Play Music. To read past Modern Love columns, click here. Continue following our fashion and lifestyle coverage on Facebook (Styles and Modern Love), Twitter (Styles, Fashion and Weddings) and Instagram.

Sahred From Source link Fashion and Style

from WordPress http://bit.ly/2V0zAyw via IFTTT

#IFTTT #WordPress

0 notes

benrleeusa · 5 years

Text

[David Post] More from, and to, Prof. Dershowitz

Further explication of our ongoing disagreement concerning the scope and conduct of the Mueller investigation.

Last week, I published a post [here] criticizing the comments that Alan Dershowitz had made in a Fox News interview [here] concerning the Michael Cohen guilty pleas. Prof. Dershowitz responded to my post [here], chiding me for, among other things, "deliberately failing to quote" from his more extensive op-ed dealing with these issues [here]. I noted, parenthetically, that I hadn't quoted or cited Dershowitz' op-ed because I was unaware of its existence.

I would have been content to leave the matter there, but Prof. Dershowitz has again taken issue with what I wrote.

"It's no excuse that Post was unaware of my oped on the subject. Tom Brady would have done a bit of research - a simple Google search - before leveling an unfair attack based on an out-of-context TV snippet. I want the debate to be live so that the public can judge who is Willie Mays and who is Tom Brady. The only time ageists comment on my advanced age is when they disagree with conclusions and don't have good responses on the me merits."

First, let me be clear that I wasn't commenting on Prof. Dershowitz' age, any more than I was commenting on Willie Mays' age, in the original post; I was commenting on his performance in public view - on the field, as it were.

Second: I do not agree that I should have searched for and consulted his op-ed - or any of this other writings, for that matter - before writing the original post. I don't buy it. He said what he said, and an audience of many millions of people - no more than a handful of whom, surely, had read his op-ed - heard what he said. For the vast majority of those viewers, then, that is his contribution to the public debate on these matters. I hardly think it is unfair to base my criticism of what he said on what he said.

I am not unaware that it can be difficult to summarize complicated legal arguments in a sound bite or snippet. But that is just the risk you take when you voluntarily inject yourself into the public debate via TV interviews and sound bite snippets. Certainly, in the pressure of the moment, anyone may say things that are incorrect and/or misleading; I've done it myself. But the correct response in that case is a retraction, perhaps accompanied by an explanation or even an apology, not "Go read my other stuff and you'll see what I meant to say."

Third: "Read the op-ed," Prof. Dershowitz wrote, "and respond to that." Fine - I did, and I shall. I don't believe it strengthens Dershowitz' case.

"It was always an uphill struggle for Mueller, since collusion itself is not a crime. In other words, even if he could show that individuals in the Trump campaign had colluded with Russian agents to help elect Trump, that would be a serious political sin, but not a federal crime. Even if Mueller could prove that members of the Trump team had colluded with Julian Assange to use material that Assange had unlawfully obtained, that, too, would not be a crime. What would be a crime is something that no one claims happened: namely, that members of the Trump campaign told Assange to hack the Democratic National Committee before Assange did so. Merely using the product of an already committed theft of information is not a crime." (emphasis added)

That is incorrect. To be sure, "collusion" (whatever it may mean, precisely), or using stolen information, is not always a crime. But that's not what he said; he said - three times in one paragraph - that it is not a crime when in fact, in certain circumstances, it may well be. And we don't yet know, because Mueller has not completed his investigation, whether those circumstances did, or did not, pertain in connection with the 2016 election.

I can think of any number of very plausible "collusion" scenarios, based on (and consistent with) everything we now know about the actions of Trump campaign officials during the 2016 campaign, that would indeed constitute federal and/or state crimes. For instance:

It is unlawful for foreign nationals (and, by extension, foreign governments) to contribute, directly or indictly, "anything of value" in connection with a federal, state, or local election, and it is unlawful for anyone to "solicit, accept, or receive" such a contribution. 52 USC § 30121.

The Economic Espionage Act makes it a federal crime for anyone who "receives, buys, or possesses a trade secret, knowing the same to have been stolen or appropriated, obtained, or converted without authorization" if he or she "intend[ed] or kn[ew] that the offense will benefit any foreign government, foreign instrumentality, or foreign agent." 18 USC 1831.

It is a federal crime for any person "who acts as an agent, representative, employee, or servant, or any person who acts in any other capacity at the order, request, or under the direction or control, of a foreign principal or of a person any of whose activities are directly or indirectly supervised, directed, controlled, financed, or subsidized in whole or in major part by a foreign principal," to "engage within the United States in political activities for or in the interests of such foreign principal" or to "act as ... a political consultant for or in the interests of such foreign principal" or to "solicit, collect, disburse, or dispense contributions, loans, money, or other things of value for or in the interest of such foreign principal" without registering as a foreign agent with the DOJ. 22 USC § 611, 612.

It is a federal crime for anyone to "receive, possess, conceal, store, barter, sell, or dispose" of any "goods, wares, or merchandise, ... which have crossed a State or United States boundary after being stolen, unlawfully converted, or taken, knowing the same to have been stolen, unlawfully converted, or taken." 18 USC § 2315

It is a federal crime to "knowingly steal, ... or obtain by fraud, artifice, or deception" any "trade secret that is related to a ,,, service used in or intended for use in interstate or foreign commerce," intending or knowing that the offense will, injure any owner of that trade secret> It is also unlawful to "receive, buy, or possess such information, knowing the same to have been stolen or appropriated, obtained, or converted without authorization," and to "conspire with one or more other persons to commit" any of these offenses. 18 U.S.C.S. § 1832

It is a federal crime to "intentionally access without authorization" a computer "which is used in or affecting interstate or foreign commerce or communication" and obtaining information thereby, as well as accessing such computer "knowingly and with intent to defraud ... and by means of such conduct furthers the intended fraud and obtains anything of value> 18 USC § 1030 et seq.

And that is just for starters, off the top of my head; there could well be additional crimes involved in conspiracies to accomplish any or all of the above. And the larger question of whether the Trump campaign was a "Racketeering Enterprise" under RICO.

Let me be clear: I am not saying that we know, at this point, whether these crimes have been committed. I don't know, and Prof. Dershowitz doesn't know, what facts Mueller has uncovered regarding what transpired during the many meetings and phone calls that now appear to have taken place between Cohen, Manafort, Roger Stone, Julian Assange, Donald Trump Jr., etc. etc. and agents of the Russian government in connection with the Wikileaks release of stolen DNC emails, and whether those contacts satisfy the elements of these violations.

But to say - as Dershowitz has said - that whatever happened, it was at most a "political sin" and not a federal crime is bizarre, irresponsible, and incorrect.

One final point. Prof. Dershowitz' op-ed also contained this:

"It is important to note that Special Counsel Robert Mueller does not have a roving commission to ferret out political sin, to provoke new crimes, or to publish non-criminal conclusions that may be embarrassing to the President. His mandate, like that of every other prosecutor, is to uncover past crimes. In Mueller's case those crimes must relate to Russia."

That also is incorrect. Mueller's mandate is spelled out, quite clearly, in his appointment letter [here]: In order to "discharge the [DOJ's] responsibilty to ensure a full and thorough investigation of the Russian government's efforts to interfere in the 2016 presidential election," Mueller was expressly authorized to conduct an investigation into "any links and/or coordination between the Russian government and individuals associated with the campaign of Donald Trump" (emphasis added). That is a considerably broader mandate than one limited to "uncover[ing] past crimes." Indeed, Prof. Dershowitz' own argument - that using information that was known to have been unlawfully obtained by a foreign government and which was being made available, in secret transactions, for the express purpose of influencing an American presidential election isn't a crime! - shows how much broader Mueller's mandate actually is.

I'd like to know if that actually happened, crime or no crime: did Trump campaign officials in fact use information that was known to have been unlawfully obtained by a foreign government and which they knew was being made available to them via secret transactions for the express purpose of influencing an American presidential election? And thankfully, that - and not Prof. Dershowitz' imagined mandate - is precisely what the American people, through our Department of Justice, have authorized Mueller to figure out as best he can. What the hell was going on? Were there "any links and/or coordination between the Russian government and individuals associated with the campaign of Donald Trump"? And if there were, what were they, and how did they operate, and for what purpose? It may turn out to be profoundly important for the future of this country that we have authorized an investigation to help us figure that out.

But Prof. Dershowitz' has mischaracterized all that for his viewers and readers. They would conclude - reasonably enough, based on Prof. Dershowitz' mischaracterization of the mandate - that the Mueller investigation will have somehow "failed" if it produces nothing more than uncover "political sins" and not indictable crimes. That is false, and it is pernicious.

0 notes