#I did something RIGHT for once!!!!!!!
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[checks which chapter was just adapted] but I want gear 5 to be animated nooooow
Wailing sobbing sliding across my desk like a pathetic little slime
#spoilers#but I'm not tagging this main-tag-wise bc I'm just rambling#I just want to hear the drums officially dammit is that so bad#I've been listening to Luffy's awakened performance and Luffy's awakening theme on loop for the past 2 days now#Recently found them again after like. 6months. AND ITS STILL NOT HERE YET#I'm going to combust and die I neeeeeeeed it#PLEASE RELEASE THE EPISODES F A S T E R#GH#Cruddy rambles#Sobs#I really really really hope they do rubberhose animation. I want Luffy to look like he transported himself to a totally different show#Like that cup/he/ad show that came out recently? I'd kill for that style of animation for g5#WITH Looney Tunes sfx of course#Listen this is PERSONAL okay#I made an oc whose magic I based on the wacky wonders of one/piec/e by giving him protection magic based on cartoons#Bc I thought hey oda does some funky stuff with Luffy being rubber and all#And then!!! GEAR 5 HAPPENED!!! AND I LOST MY MIND!#I did something RIGHT for once!!!!!!!#Cord isn't alone anymore... Granted he's not as op as g5 bc it's for protection but even still!!!!#He bounces his eyes pop out he gets little birds that circle his head he can run on air so long as he doesn't look down#He gets xylophoned when crushed and pops back up perfectly fine#I designed it all off of on/e/pie/ce and then it turned around and proved me right and I 😭😭😭#This funky little dude is something that can be so personal...#And also it's cool as fuck and I NEED to know how they're gonna animate it#Especially when Luffy jump ropes with Kaido#That and Luffy hitting the gear 2nd pose while in gear 5... I lost my mind when I saw that panel#I got tons of hate on the sub that day for voicing my excitement abt g5 and how cool it was... Who's laughing now ya fuckin fun police???#It's Luffy. Holy shit he can't fucking stop...#Anyway. I'm sorry. I'm suuuuper tired I'm just rambling at this point. I'm gonna go calm down and write a little b4 I sleep#This H2O au isn't gonna write itself... No matter how much I hope it will.......
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Please elaborate on your twst Pokémon headcannons I’m very interested
I had planned on drawing everyone for this (I made a LIST!) but it. hasn't been going well. 💀 soooo here's what I have so far!
Riddle - Roserade (I was going with 'no legendaries', otherwise I would've given him a Shaymin) (and I don't think Togedemaru is actually a hedgehog or I would've given him one of those too) (...they kind of do fit though. hmm.)
Trey - Alcremie (clover/mint cream + strawberry/ruby cream)
Cater - DITTO SQUAD! DITTO SQUAD! DITTO SQUAD!
Ace - Impidimp (I feel like there's probably a better one for him, but I can't think of it)
Deuce - Scraggy (meanwhile I KNOW deep in my heart that this is true)
Leona - Pyroar (but like. a nasty Pyroar. just a grizzly old Pyroar with the shittiest attitude imaginable. they pretend to hate each other but secretly they are a bonded pair, do not separate)
#art#twisted wonderland#pokemon#poketwst#i'm trying not to pressure myself too much art-wise right now#but i would like to do more of the characters!#(especially considering this started with my insistence that malleus would have a dragapult)#gotta draw something i don't immediately hate first ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ#ANYWAY enough art angst!#i'm not aiming for full teams or delving too deep into lore or anything#just one or two per character that i think fit!#i was pretty torn on leona for a while because pyroar is at once the obvious choice but also. not really?#(i did consider luxray and ultimately decided it doesn't really fit either)#but i kind of love Nasty Lionboy's Nasty Pyroar#i think there's probably some. like. ~royal tradition~ that they all bond with this one specific breeding line or whatever#and leona deliberately chose just the absolute worst one#took one look at this shitty rude pokemon and immediately went 'that one'#falena was like 'are...are you SURE' and leona cops an attitude like 'i'm choosing my OWN pokemon you're not my DAD'#as pyroar is actively attempting to eat him#actually it probably tried to eat kifaji first and that's when leona decided he liked it#me: this is just for funsies i'm not doing lore (writes a whole fanfic in the tags)
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collab #2 with @xenole
i was given a chibi yakumo and i.. i...... turned it into thiS
#I AM SO SORRY I DREW YAKUMO AGAIN ADFSJEIADKS LOOK OK so xenole gives me the tiny crying yakumo.#says DO WHATEVER YOU WANT and THUS i get to thinking#my immediate thought was#i'm going to make oli breast boobily while comforting him#bc i was determined to draw xenole's fave this time. i swore it to myself. i WILL stop being so self indulgent#but the chibi on chibi comforting scene didn't sit right with me. it was too straightforward. not something i would draw normally#it was hhhh as u say.... not on brand.? it did not inspire me. idea benched....#so days pass and i'm still pondering ideas on what to do to the sad spaghetti.#configurations of clan members danced in my head. some defending yaku. some comforting. some bullying#the ideas usually involved at least oli or kuya bc once again. xenole bias#then while i'm in the shower i got frustrated with my lack of ideas and thought#i'll jujst eat.him. just. chew on him. i'm tired of him#AND THE IMAGE OF KUYA EATING YAKUMO FOR BREAKFAST POPPED INTO MY MIND#originally it was going to be kuya eating yakuflakes and oli giving him serious side eye but then the brain went#WHAT IF IT'S YAKUMO WATCHING KUYA EAT YAKUMO. THAT IS FUNNY. IT MUMST HAPPEEN#BUT I REFUSED at first. i was angry at myself. this is not a competition to see how you can STILL sHOVE YAKUMO into a drawing.#plus the composition would shrink xenole's chibi down! i would take over so much space by comparison! THE DISRESPECT! TO THE COLLAB PROCESS#but once i get fixated on smth...well. i ended up doing the idea and just praying xenole wouldnt eviscerate me for it#i'm sorry my liege. my grip on the reins was weak. the goofy clown horses went stampeding#so idk now it's the two of em having a peaceful breakfast in kuya's cabin but only kuya is at peace and yakumo's this close to a breakdown#i feel like there should be something in the space between them. a speech bubble or something . something mean is being said#kuya#yakumo#yakuya
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Something about Steven Universe being asked why he wasn’t Pink Diamond when he should be and him screaming “SHES GONE” in the most bone chilling way that shook the world and broke the ground beneath him
Something about Lake breaking the train’s engine room in frustration after being denied over and over again, screaming and crying right at you saying that they’re not Tulip, not a sliver, not a null, or anything else that other people have labeled them, they are a PERSON
More of that please
#steven universe#infinity train#transgender#just god. that trans rage. it fucks me up every fucking time ill never recover#it just gets right up in your face and tells you that there is something wrong with you for not getting it through your skull#that these people are who they say they are#anyway shout out to the best trans metaphors ever and yes i did just watch the su finale#and i did go batshit insane once again over the SHES GONE scene
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i have played hollow knight for approximately 80 hours in the past 11 days
(alternate version with autism creature eyes/face as requested by my friend below cut)
#this was GENUINELY my best fucking attempt at little ghost i redrew their head Several fucking times and also the entire them once#i love them so much but i cannot give them what they deserve#decided to not even try drawing the hollow knight. they have Too Many Joints#but if i did their caption wouldve been something like ''third more fucked up sibling''#would they be the eldest sibling? probably right? i could make an eldest sibling trauma joke too#the abysmal size difference here is Hysterical to me btw. it was Not on purpose i just cant proportion but its hilarious im keeping it#z talks#hollow knight#i did draw the autism creature face myself#no copy pasting here#also hornets legs are just lines bc i tried to make them more like in game but i coulnt make it work . so
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more aro week dragon! he’s very enthusiastic about his job <3 (flags: aromantic, demiromantic, cupioromantic, aroace, greyromantic)
click for better quality
reblogs >> likes! please don’t like if you don’t rb
#aro week#aromaticism#aromantic week#aro pride#aro#aromantic#aromantic spectrum#arospec#demiromantic#cupioromantic#greyromantic#aroace#pride art#my art?#i don’t usually draw the cozy guys more than the once but this one Demanded it#if you want a version w a different arospec flag shoot me an ask or a dm and I’ll make it these r just what I came up w & then insta q box#yes I did get the demiro colors mixed up Again and yes it is My Own Flag I don’t. idk why it will not stick in my brain right#these all Should be right I checked three times but. again let me know if there’s another (arospec) or if I got something mixed up#also all of my cozy pride beans use any and all pronouns whatever you want them to have im just usin he for this one this time#i cannot put a link into this for some reason? i just wanted to hook it to their other art I’ll try again right after I post#anyways. i had a wood glue epiphany today and my brain is in Wonky Town so sorry for and weird ramblings but HAPPY STILL ARO WEEK#hopefully I’ll be able to get my last thing done to post Friday or Saturday :3 hopin hoping
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enjoy your stay!
#w101#wizard101#w101 fandom#wizard101 fandom#dasein#sal art#finally did a full-body piece of his post-canon fit for his and aedan's verse!#in their canon things go a bit differently at the end of novus#which means wallaru doesnt happen#so for a while dasein just kept his Pajamas Form (the blue smokey one)#but i decided that was more of an interim look than anything else and he needed something a little more permanent#and made this one!#right side crystal-esque pattern of his outfit is mostly based on the aeon armor#as is the blobby bits on his sleeves (which move!) and his rings (which mimic the gems on the hands on the back of the robes)#(since as far as im concerned he created the aeon gear and the hands are meant to be him literally 'having our back' so theyre His hands)#left side is based on both his canon post-wallaru fit as well as the gmod missing texture pattern#its a little too small to see but he has a collar chain that's got little eyes as the pins :]#he keeps the blue-grey color but gets his wings back and also isn't constantly shifting anymore#and he also keeps the old one's converse those are a permanent fixture--#the little eye fellas are like scouts/messengers and let him keep track of multiple parts of novus at once#without getting too overwhelmed#sighhh i could talk about this guy forever#one day i'll actually finish his and aedan's fic
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h-how do you ever finish any of your work? genuine question because you seem to be productive despite your agreste syndrome and I need to learn your ways. but also how do you ever finish any of your work
unclear. last night i stayed up and finished a report worth 25% of my grade at about 5am, arrived on time for my 9am lecture, and spent about half of it zoned out while thinking about seventeen year old emilie agreste. and i was one of the most active participants in the class discussion
#in some ways it IS the move to go to grad school right out of undergrad#because your body can still sort of operate like a college kid#i’m on about 3ish hours of sleep rn and this morning it felt SO over but now i’ve eaten something and we’re so back#i also don’t really do caffeine. except sometimes i’ll go get one of those panera death lemonades#i might be able to snag a short nap before work#but anyway about seventeen year old emilie. i was thinking abt how she was in that movie solitude and adrien said she was seventeen#WAIT. NO. HE SAID SHE WAS SEVENTEEN IN THAT PHOTO ON HIS DESKTOP NOT IN THE MOVIE#well. okay whatever i’m gonna tell you what i was thinking about anyway#OKAY i’m back i just checked the wikipedia page and then i watched the end of gorizilla. to make sure i’m not lying. because i’m normal.#anyway i was thinking about the solitude film and how it’s super rare and old and obscure and whatever. and how apparently#emilie wrote it herself and andre produced it#and i’m thinking about how gabe was discovered by audrey and that’s how he got his start in the fashion industry#so now i’m like?? did gabe and emilie first meet on the set of solitude? because gabe was designing costumes or whatever?#and that’s how audrey found him? have people already thought about this??#also i just checked and it doesn’t say emilie’s last name in the credits and also it’s ‘graham films’ with the twin rings logo m#so i’m assuming she’s still emilie graham de vanily at that point#anyway it comes back to seventeen year old emilie because i started imagining seventeen year old runaway emilie having her new life in pari#after escaping her british nobility life#and the first thing she does is write and star in an original movie. of course.#and she meets this repressed bisexual punk upstart costume designer who is so the opposite of everyone she’s ever known#and he’s immediately so unhealthily obsessed with her. which she appreciates.#and then they proceed to have the most toxic doomed evil relationship of all time#also she gets cheated because once gabe gets money he represses himself SO hard that he is now exactly like all the people emilie grew up w#but at least he’s still obsessed with her#this is what i was thinking about during class today. i don’t know how i get anything done either.#ml#anna rambles#asks
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#something is very obviously different about these two compared to my normal images on this blog. i acknowledge this#also the sv model is Really good. and since they always stare straight at the camera anyway… and no one pays attention to the background…#and the only high-quality phantump model i could find was so horribly shiny that its eyes were just white voids#in my defense‚ phantump always just stare straight at you in game#the lighting is different‚ yeah. that's probably the dead giveaway. beyond the background. but like. i'm the only being on the planet who#really likes phantump anyway. i feel like it's a generally forgettable pokémon to most folks#phantump#HELLO this one is a weird one. i have some explaining to do. so when i did this one i didn't know how to edit models really at all#and when i got the models for these‚ the xy models were super shiny. shiny to the point that it made their eyes fuckin invisible#and i decided that since you could barely tell it was phantump‚ i needed a different way to get these images#i remembered that in the SV dlc‚ every time you find a wild phantump‚ it just fucking. stares. at you. and i was like. aha#i kinda remembered because of the test stream that i did. tumblr user alligayytorr (am i getting the right amount of Ys) said#“haha i am getting a sneak peek” when i zoomed the camera in on a phantump. and i remembered that. and i was like. i can utilize this#and ended up using just an in-game screenshot of SV in replacement of the regular content. later on‚ after that#once we got into gen 7 and it became less and less reliable to find models‚ i had to learn how to edit them manually to remove the shine#i am a software dev. not a 3d modeler. this ended up coming down to editing the code of the models directly (which i ended up writing a#script to automate). now‚ today‚ january 22nd (the day of me writing these tags and updating this post)‚ i remembered this post was in the#queue and was not normal. so i went back‚ ran the script on the phantump and trevenant models‚ and unshinified them#then edited these two posts to be normal. i have left the original pictures i took under the cut for reference and as bonuses#because i really enjoy phantump. so that's why those images are there‚ and that's why these tags are here#just for posterity's sake‚ the folks who come here mostly for my commentary‚ i've left the ORIGINAL tags of the post when i initially#made it with the SV pictures up at the top (i wanted to rearrange them‚ but tumblr makes that Very difficult‚ so i left them as-is)#so if these tags are confusing to read i Apologize. but i hope now that you're at the bottom you understand what happened#i'm gonna go edit the trevenant post now
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I feel bad for Starlo.
Star has a point, idk what the four were ticked off about, there is like 99% chance everyone willingly participated in the trolley problem, based on what we've seen of his behavior thus far it's not like Starlo to be that big of a jerk/drag them by force/yell at them to do it. Ed's words:
he does it because Star asks NICELY
clearly jealous
It genuinely seemed like a fun time/fun roleplay, especially since every day is the same. Like, the five are supposed to be a rowdy and adventures bunch, what exactly did Starlo do wrong, I'm genuinely confused and curious. Except taking a big liking in Clover (his posse should know that this is a big moment for him, according to Blackjack they've known each other since high school and had the same liking for westerns. So they were basically a nerd gang.) Starlo was kind, patient and considerate towards Clover the whole time, even warned Mooch about them not being bandits, taught Clover gun safety, wanted to bring his posse along for a fun time, thanked Ace for telling him about getting Clover a new hat...
Sure, at first he only liked Clover for being a human, but as Ceroba says, that changed and he grew to genuinely care about them, plus I can't help but think Star saw himself in Clover and that's part of the reason he was so proud of them all the time even when they messed up (I'll talk more about this at some point)
What exactly made Ace want to leave the gang? He even said how he doesn't mind "getting run over by the fake train"
he's so nice. says sorry for forgetting the safety goggles even when he was scatterbrained due to his excitement. I love him so much
The only real "faults" (I'll call them temporary faults) I saw in Star during the Wild East section was that he was even more enthusiastic and more proud than usual. But how couldn't he be when he met a member of the species that he has admired for so long because they have real cowboys and sheriffs on the surface (who are seen as brave heroes who deliver justice, while Star canonically feels like a nobody farmer). His posse should have realized Clover wouldn't be there forever and just let their boss enjoy himself with his "deputy who'd have to leave sooner or later anyway"(or be more patient with him/ask him why he feels this strongly towards Clover/if there's a deeper reason for that). His friends including Ceroba just turn their back on him so quickly instead. The moment he's gotten the chance to feel valued for once and put himself first and not have to take care of this whole town and everyone in it and live his dream of meeting a real human, suddenly "his personality is damaged?"
Star's literally built this whole town, organised everything, he worries about everyone, Ceroba (plus was the one to give her emotional strength before and after Clover's sacrifice), Kanako, the monsters, his family, struggles with feelings of worthlessness yet never wipes that smile off his face, always does his best to be hopeful and optimistic and make others laugh, gave his posse a nap time so they don't become exhausted, gave Ceroba a free home, didn't act upon his feelings towards her and was a 110% supportive, caring friend instead. THAT'S who he is. He's the papa bear of this friend group, the glue holding everyone together.
He was just *really* excited. Y'all know he's insecure and just wishes to escape who he is and yet y'all blame him for liking Clover so much. Yeah, the four are very clearly jealous. But why won't the four of you control your feelings for a while? As mentioned, Clover WILL HAVE TO LEAVE EVENTUALLY. They won't be Star's "deputy" forever (the kid who's just as into westerns as he is, who values justice just as much, who also values doing the right thing. Someone he clearly felt understood in the presence of, whom he loved; just look at the way he talks about Clove during Showdown). Star seems genuinely confused of what he did wrong poor guy just wanted to live his fantasy for once and feel important:
Even at the beginning Moray's like "oh no Martlet is upset" Mooch replies "don't be a buzzkill nothing exciting ever happens around here" and Ray's like "Yeah you've got a point"
If you all agreed to have a little fun with a human who will very soon leave forever why is Starlo's enthusiasm such a big problem? If the posse weren't into this after all (unless they were simply too jealous which could have been solved with a honest talk and a little patience) why are you doing this "rowdy" job with Star in the first place? Do you want your boring routine day to day life so much back? Or just for Clover to leave (which they will soon enough)? You, western enthusiasts, literally met a real human, A HUMAN FROM WESTERNS YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE PASSIONATELY INTO (clearly not as passionate as Star but passionate ENOUGH to understand where he's coming from).
... okay.
#Like idk if I'm being biased because Star is my favorite character but I kinda just started thinking more and more about this and... yeesh.#Felt like a BIT of an overreaction to blame Starlo this much#No wonder he cracked#and unlike with Ceroba we actually see him do his very best to “fix” what he did “wrong”#i feel so much sympathy for this guy man#WAY more than for Ceroba#sorry fox lady#uty#undertale yellow#starlo uty#uty starlo#like dude literally had to come crawling on his hands and knees for them to forgive him#what “loyal” “supportive” friends they all are#sobbing for star#poor poor man#meanwhile everyone forgave ceroba for much much MUCH worse#she didn't need to burst into tears and beg for forgiveness even though she SHOULD have#everyone forgives her immediately on the spot + she gets a hug from clover#I'm sorry Starlo#like how was he “selfish” and “reckless”#he did something for himself for the 1st time in his life#y'all are reckless too btw#you put yourself first ONCE and they call you selfish#Star had the right to be mad at them for attacking Clover for no reason other than jealousy#wdym he's throwing you around for human business you literally wanted this#he watched the tapes more than 50 times bc that's how much he hates himself#and yet he's still been doing EVERYTHING in his power to be there for EVERYBODY
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I'm one year older today, so I figured I gotta wrap a present or two~
.
..
...
... Wait...
... I got it backwards, didn't I...
... I'm supposed to be... uhh... the one opening gifts today...
... Oh, how incredibly silly of me...
Welp, I'm sure Ramattra doesn't mind~
#Borb's Scribbles#Overwatch#Ramattra#Unholy Abomination#rest in pepperonis my blog's rating#fr tho my bday is the time of year when i allow myself to be completely unhinged and self indulgent in art#bc may as well treat myself right?#my victim this year is our poor ramram#and i just so happened to be in the mood for something more... extreme... this time#i doodle sin every once in a while#tho it's been YEARS since i made sin that i would deem “finished art”#this is the first one of those i'm actually proud of#and HOT DAMN I did not realize just how much power i have in my hands-#shit i may just have to draw polished sin more often#because if i don't draw what i wanna see who will???#i have been disrespectfully staring at the other variants for way too long now-#...oh yeah did i mention there are rated e variants of this?#because OF COURSE there are#kinda wanna post them but tumblr would probably crucify me for showing robot schlong#welp ya'll just gonna have to live with that i guess lol#jk jk bear with me while i wrap my head around a website that allows this stuff to be posted-
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Nicklas Bäckström & the Washington Capitals (+ nickeovi) ― Immortality, Clare Harner | insp.
credits: x. x. x. x. x. x. x. x. x. x.
#uh. it has not been done yet right?#because the whole thing was kickstarted by another nicke post with a caption that read something like#“he really did say do NOT weep on my grave you're so annoying”#but i cant find it anymore#edit: found it! tysm @lafragolina <3#& by association i did not find other edits w nicke and this poem in particular#so i hope i did not rip anyone off -- in case let me know i'll delete#apropos of this poem i don't know how common knowledge it is (i did not know for once but i also do not read poetry that often so)#it is often attribuited to the wrong author one mary elizabeth frye who used to hand out copies of this poem w her name attached to it#she even changed some lines! anyway i linked the wiki article if you wanna check out more info -- its interesting#nicklas backstrom#nicklas bäckström#alexander ovechkin#washington capitals#nickeovi#819#hockey rpf#hockey poetry
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It’s about how Cha Yeowoon represented everything everything everything that Tae Myungha hated about himself and he fell in love anyway. He fell in love with the broken sad boy who just needed someone there.
It’s about how Myungha took care of everyone else but neglected himself. He neglected the sad boy who just needed someone there.
What Myungha needed was nothing more than himself.
It’s about how Yeowoon fell in love with Myunga and in doing so learned to love himself enough to advocate when he was unhappy and he’s needs weren’t being met.
It’s about how Yeowoon learned to give people he hated a chance because he gave Myungha a chance and he learned people are wonderful actually.
What Yeowoon needed was to give himself a chance.
And now they have each other and they’re both happy. But more importantly, they are choosing each other and choosing happiness. They no longer need each other to be happy but they get the choice and they choose each other.
#love for love's sake#feeling completely normal about this show#how am i supposed to watch anything else tonight#cause this show did something to me and i cant even explain what#the storytelling is just on a completely different level#this show makes me want to sing and laugh and never take a single moment for granted#but it also makes me want to cry and let myself feel what i need to feel#that ending really took its audience by the hand and led us into a warm embrace#it walked us right into the safest hug#and i am absolutely and completely fine#and for once i mean it
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someone tagged the hope poem post 'the words of the prophets are written on the subway walls' excuse me while i cry in a corner forever
#[guy at a party meme] they don't even know about my lifelong obsession with that song......#man okay the thing about that post right#is i browse the replies for a bit basically every time it pops back up in my notifs#bc every time there is a not insignificant number of new tags saying something along the lines of 'i really needed this today'#and more than once people have left tags in there about how that poem helped keep them ALIVE#and like goddamn i did not set out with that intention but if i accomplish nothing else in my entire life#i did once write something that helped#and there's been some days i've really needed that#mumbling
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finished making the hair ties i wanted! plus now theo has them too since they’re for his hair anyway :)
#river dipping#ts4#ts4 edit#matthias evanoff#theodore doe#echthroi#once again there was no need for me to edit these screenshots i just really like doing it <3#they look so handsome.......#all together there are nine versions! theo has a left and a right version for the hair ties#but matthias just has a left version (since i made his first! i could go add a right version for him but he's left handed anyway)#there's one version where it's both hair ties like in that pic of matthias vs. the separated versions of the hair ties like in theo's pic#i know i've made my own preset and my own poses / scars / moles / tattoos but i've never done anything with mesh editing!!#well... i did fix that muzzle cc that matthias wears so that it fits his face properly... which!!! now that i know how to mess with uvs#like... i can actually take the mesh of the muzzle and properly fit it to his nose bridge and everything... gahhhh#i'm so pleased!! i've already tested the hair ties in game too since jerma was just streaming so i had something to watch#i just spent the first hour or so of the stream making theo's left wrist hair ties and then the rest of the stream playing in game#no glitches or bugs that i know of! success!!!#also modeled these hair ties off the hair ties i use... i actually have one on my wrist rn and let me just say... they look the exact same
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I keep starting and abandoning posts that go into my drafts, as I try to stay tasteful about how fucking revolted this part makes me. Like, I'm legitimately unsure if the very relevant trauma I have is making me see things that aren't here
But first we see that Star Flower is trying to ingratiate herself to the group, just after she reappears from chapter 5. Chapter 5 is about how Clear Sky is still abusive towards his son, and she comes in after stroking his ego, stressing how alone she is, and appealing to how she'll be loyal unlike his child. (She glances over at Thunder, directly implying this.)
Now in Chapter 9, she's babysitting and trying to care for Milkweed's kits (in spite of discomfort from Milkweed), taking a wet sleeping space away from the others, and pulling more than her own weight "without complaint." Putting herself through harsh sitations to prove her worth.
All while trying to appear extra attractive to Thunder, and later Clear Sky. Basically every man in power who can "protect her"
Like, am I going fucking crazy? With how we later find out that Star Flower was "promised as a mate" to One Eye's subordinate Slash, is... is that hypersexualization? One of the extremely stigmatized symptoms of sexual abuse?
She goes to find Clear Sky alone to throw herself at his paws, and he's very quickly attracted to how she promises to perfectly obey him, have no needs of her own, and finally be the perfect servant that he desires
"I don't deserve your trust because I am dirt. I understand you because I also regret something. I'd die for you. I'll never betray you unlike those who have."
This isn't manipulation. She means this. The story is playing their romance sincerely. She's comparing "betraying" Thunder by telling her own father about an assassination ambush to Clear Sky's history of child abuse, physical assault, and murder
She believes she's on the same level as this; a monster who murdered a childhood friend in a fit of entitled rage. She was a victim of One Eye who really believes that the way her father used her means she "understands" this monster, deserves this treatment.
And Clear Sky LIKES that.
He likes that she will have COMPLETE FAITH in him. That she will follow him WITHOUT QUESTION. That she will OBEY his orders. That's fucking verbatim, that's THE TEXT!!!
WHILE HE'S STILL CRYING ABOUT "ive tried to atone every day" FOLLOWING THE LAST TWO BOOKS WHERE THE ONLY SHITTY THING HE DOESN'T DO IS MURDER INNOCENT WOMEN
Am I insane?? Am I wrong??? Am I missing something here???? Why the fuck is the fandom takeaway "haha sexy girl steals his dad." Did I read the same book
#Csa mention#Did they once again do a misogyny so hard they accidentally gave their woman character trauma#My tip to anyone in a draining relationship. If your partner fetishizes that YOU would never leave or betray them unlike ''all the others''#RUN.#There may be a reason their exes cut ties with them and they're praising you for ignoring red flags#Especially when your partner is significantly older and more experienced#Theres nothing noble about constantly suffering for the sake of 'loyalty'#Star Flower PLEASE get out of here you dont fucking deserve this you did nothing wrong#Bones reads dotc#Dotc hate#I thought i was just remembering things wrong when i was adding the subtheme of thunder having a connection to star via abusive dads-#-in my dotc rewrite. But no it's right there. It's in the text and it's something clear is attracted to#I abuse the shit out of my son and he left me once over it#But i can abuse this girl his same age and she won't run. Finally! A victim who won't leave!#And then they become mates and she births at least two litters#Cw abuse#sa mention#EDIT: I've changed the language just slightly#because the timeline COULD work out that starf was an adult when she was promised to slash for a very brief window of time#and hypersexualization is a symptom of trauma resulting from many types of sex abuse. Even that done when the victim was an adult.#it's just more common in CSA
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