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starrystormwritings · 1 month

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The Water Is Fine

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James Potter x Black! Reader

A/n: This is inspired by the song The Water Is Fine by Chloe Ament and I tried to write proper conflict in this and I don't think it's great lol

Summary: After retuning home for Christmas you end up following in the footsteps of Sirius.

Warnings: Blood, cuts, abuse, swearing, arguing, she/her, reader is a member of the Black family and is the same age as Sirius but isn't called a twin or described in anyway.

Word Count: 2890

(NOT MY GIF)

I walked into the great hall with a quicker pace than normal since I'd accidentally slept in a little and still wanted time for breakfast before the train left for Christmas break.

I spotted my brother and our friends sat on the Gryffindor table laughing at something as I approached, causing my speed to pick up even more.

"Morning!" I said whilst wrapping my arms around James's shoulders from behind him before pressing a quick kiss to his head and taking a seat in the spot left empty next to him.

"You're cutting it very close." James said with a laugh, kissing my cheek in response, his arm resting over my shoulders as I began to load my plate with breakfast.

"I know, I slept in and realised I hadn't done my packing."

"Organised as ever." Sirius said with a laugh, shaking his head disapprovingly.

"You're one to talk." Remus laughed from next to him.

James coughed awkwardly and looked down at me with a more serious face, "So, have you made up your mind on where you're spending Christmas?"

James and Sirius had been trying to persuade me to spend Christmas with the Potters for weeks now, Remus was spending New Years there as well and Peter only lived five minutes away so we could all be together.

I shook my head slightly and turned away from the boy, picking at the breakfast in front of me. "I don't know still, I'll decide on the train."

"C'mon love, please? I don't like the idea of you being stuck in that house with those people for two weeks. They won't even let you send me an owl so I know you're okay."

His pleading was cut off by the squawking of the owls delivering the mail from above us.

Two small black envelopes were dropped onto the table in front of us, causing me and Sirius to look at each other with an identical worried look in our eyes.

I picked up the one addressed to me and inspected it for a moment. Looking up and over at the Slytherin table to see Regulus already looking at me nervously, the same black envelope in his hands.

I sighed and slowly opened it, the silence that had now taken over our small group as they watched me and Sirius not helping with the anxiety growing in the back of my throat.

'Dearest Y/n, You are expected for an appearance at the Black home immediately for the Christmas holidays. Alliances must be made immediately and we intrust in you to make the correct decision. Orion and Walburga Black.'

I look up from the paper to see Sirius rolling his eyes and using his want to quickly set his letter aflame.

"They can't be serious." James said from next to me, obviously reading from over my shoulder.

"On what part?" I said with a sigh, folding the letter into a small square and slipping it into my pocket.

"On what part? The allegiances must be made part, obviously!" He said with a raised eyebrow.

"You can't be seriously considering still going? After what they're obviously asking from us?" Sirius said, giving me an unreadable look as he shook his head.

"We don't know exactly what they're asking yet. I mean I don't know how they'll react if neither of us go!" I look over his shoulder to see regulus looking at me again, his hands shaking slightly as he held the letter, his nervousness obvious to anyone.

"It's obvious what their asking Y/n, your not stupid. They want a decree of allegiance to the dark lord what else?" Sirius said, obviously pissed of that my letter wasn't in a pile of ashes next to his.

"Sirius I can't leave Regulus there alone! They probably just want us to attend a meeting or something. I might even get some information that could help Dumbledoor. I have to go Reggie's can't deal with this alone."

He huffed at me, quickly standing from the table angrily "Well I hope you have a very merry fucking Christmas then, I'll see you in the new year if you haven't already been made into a death eater."

He stormed out of the hall before I could respond, Remus running after him with an apologetic look.

I pushed the plate in front of me away, suddenly loosing my appetite.

"You okay?" James asked gently, rubbing my shoulder.

I sighed and nodded, spotting Regulus trying to wave me over in the corner of my eye.

"I will be. I just need to sort this out."

~~~~~

It was obvious that Sirius didn't want me joining their carriage on the way back and since I didn't fancy the idea of sitting with Reggie's friends either I decided to just look for an empty carriage.

After finally finding one at the end of the train I took a seat, pulling the letter out of my pocket and re-reading it again and again.

"Mind if I join you?" My boyfriend's voice said from the doorway.

I looked up with a smile, scrunching the paper back into my pocket as I nodded at him.

"Of course you can."

He smiled back and took the seat next to me, pressing a gentle kiss to my lips before pulling me into his side for a hug.

"What're you thinking?"

I shrugged slightly and sighed again.

"Honestly James I don't know what to do. I don't want Sirius to be mad at me and I'd love to spend the next two weeks with you but I don't think I can bring myself to leave Reggie there alone. I know what that house is like James, I know what they do. I always had Sirius, I wouldn't have gotten through it alone. He needs me there."

James took a deep breath, obviously upset by the conversation.

"Y/n/n I know what you mean, but please. I'll do anything if you followed me off this train and spent the next two weeks in my house, singing carols, opening presents, cuddling by the fire and drinking hot chocolate. That's what Christmas should be, not being in that cold house. I don't know what it's like I know, but from what Sirius has told me I know that you shouldn't be there. Please, I'm begging you."

I looked up at him to be met with desperate eyes. I lent in to press another soft kiss against his lips, letting my fingers caress his cheek even after I pulled away.

He rested his forehead against mine and used his arm to try and pull me even closer.

"I'm sorry James, truly. But I can't spend Christmas happy knowing what they might be doing to him. I'll be okay. I promise."

He didn't respond for a moment before just giving me a small nod and pulling me tight against his chest.

~~~~~

My mother was furious when Sirius followed after James at the station, and she was even more furious when James gave my head a gentle kiss goodbye.

She harshly gripped Regulus's arm and apparated away without looking at me.

I sighed before looking over my shoulder to see James, Sirius and Peter looking at me.

I offered a small wave and apparated away before they could respond and possibly convince me to change my mind.

As I appeared in the living room of my house I was met with my family and a few faces of men I hadn't met before.

"Follow me." My mother's voice said sternly as she swept away from the room and down the corridor.

I glanced over at Reggie who looked terrified and offered him a reassuring smile before following after her into my bedroom.

"So the Potters have sunk their teeth into you as well?" She asked after the door was shut.

Her voice still made my blood run cold, although her intimidating presence no longer held the same effect as it did when I was younger.

"I'm here aren't I?" I tried to sound strong, self assured. Like a Black would.

"Their a family of blood traitors, just like your brother. There will be no more of that from now on."

I didn't respond to that, instead just looking away from her eyes and clearing my throat to try and build my confidence again.

"What was that letter about?"

She straightened up slightly, obviously ready to deliver news that she knew there would be a reaction to.

"As you know things are changing, the Dark Lord is rightfully raising to power and it has become time for everyone to decide what they think is right. As you know your brothers already made his decision and we will have no more embarrassment put on this house. Orders have been put in place to ensure that."

"Orders?"

"You and Regulus are lucky to hold the Black family name and we expect you to wear that privilege with pride. That means no more messing about with the Potters it's time to make your family proud. Your allegiances will be cemented today and you my dear, will be Married off to the Rosier boy to continue this noble bloodline and ensure that you don't follow in your good for nothing brother's footsteps."

I looked at her dumbfounded for a second. "Evan? You can't be serious-"

Before I had a chance to argue my point I was cut off by the sound of Regulus's screams from the other side of the door.

"What was that? What're they doing to him!" I rushed towards the door but she had caught my wrist before I could move.

"Your brother is making the correct decision."

"Decision, what?" I looked at her with confusion before my eyes caught a glimpse of the mark that covered her arm and I felt a chill down my back at what was happening.

"No. No way. He's sixteen you can't brand him like that!" I ripped my arm away from her and made a move towards the door. Before I could open it though I felt a sharp cutting pain shoot up my leg.

I fell to the floor with a yelp and looked up to see my mother holding her wand sternly towards me.

The sharp burning pain was agonising but I clenched my teeth as hard as I could, refusing to give in.

"You are an adult Y/n. This is your birth right. Take it." She lent down and grabbed my arm, yanking me up to her height again. The weight on my burning leg causing me to let out a short scream.

"This isn't right. I'm not allowing you to do this to me, to him. I won't do it. I'm not marrying Evan, and I'm sure as hell not pledging my allegiance to the Dark Lord!" I shouted through gritted teeth, tears quickly streaming down my cheeks despite my best efforts.

She let go of the spell she had cast against my left leg, causing me to let out a breath of relief despite feeling the blood dripping into my shoes.

"I am your mother." Her wand now pressed against my arm, hard. "This is my blood that runs in you, the blood of hundreds of years of purity and strength. The blood of the noble house of black! This blood runs thicker than anything. You are my daughter! My skin! My flesh! My soul! You have no say in the matter, you do as I say or you pay for it!"

I could feel blood dripping from my wrist as well now, I glanced down to see the shape of a T and an R being carved against my skin in her neat handwriting.

I took a couple shaky breathes, and thanked Merlin that my adrenaline seemed to numb the pain slightly.

"I am not my family. And maybe if you weren't you would still have a son and daughter. You are a sick, sad, bitter woman who'll live the rest of her life in misery until she dies a forgetful and deserved death. You'll rot."

She stared at me, her wand pushing harder against my arm as the pain quickened. Neither of us spoke for a second before I ungritted my teeth so I could spit on her face.

She didn't respond for a second, her face full of fury before I felt a swift sting to my face as she slapped me, hard.

She'd used magic to punish me and Sirius before, but never her own hand.

She screamed before withdrawing her wand from my arm and casting a spell that dropped me back to the floor, screaming in pain as my whole body felt like it was on fire.

I laid there for a second, trying to muster the strength to move as she held the spell over me. I thought of Sirius and Regulus, and us playing outside by the lake as kids. And I thought of James and how he held me, how he made me feel save and happy. How he taught me what a home actually was.

My hand shifted to the pocket of my robes slowly, gripping my wand as tightly into my hand as I could.

I used any and all the strength I had left to pull it out, casting a spell I never thought I would against my own mother.

"Crusio!"

She dropped to her own knees with a scream, calling me every name under the sun as she writhed on the floor.

I watched horrified for a second before I saw the door open, my father's furious face prompting me to apparate out of there as quickly as I could before he could reach me.

Before I knew what was happening I was laying on the porch of the Potters house, every bone in my body burning and aching as I used the only strength I had left to weakly knock on the door.

It took a second but before I knew it the door opened to the smell of firewood, mint and vanilla and I knew he was there.

"Y/n? Merlin!"

I felt his arms wrap around my and lift me off the floor and the second I entered his embrace I allowed myself to let go, to cry.

"Mum! Dad! Sirius! Help! Please!"

The panic in his voice caused me to grip onto his shirt as hard as I could and that's the last I heard before everything went silent.

~~~~~

I woke up in the most comforting bed I could image. The reassuring smell of James engulfed me and soothed my aching body as my eyes adjusted to the warm light of the room.

James was asleep on the arm chair next to the bed, a worry line creasing his forehead and I felt a pang of guilt in my gut for what I probably put him through.

I sat up slightly, feeling a pain shoot up from my leg. I looked under the covers to see that my leg had been carefully wrapped in a bandage up to my knee and I spotted from the corner of my eye that my arm had a matching one.

I slowly unwrapped my arm to assess the damage and let out a quiet gasp when I saw the word 'traitor' neatly carved against my skin.

I felt a few tears roll down my cheek as I quickly tried to wrap it back up, not wanting to look at the word.

"My mum said it shouldn't scar, Pomfrey is coming by tomorrow with some ointment for it. If it does leave any mark it should be faint. Your leg was the problem." James's sleepy voice said from next to me, he carefully took my arm to re-wrap the bandage himself since my hands were shaking to much.

"Jamie I'm so sorry." I said with a sniff, causing the boy to frown at me.

He walked around to climb into bed next to me, pulling me into his arms gently.

"None of this is your fault, at all. You don't deserve any of it." He kissed my hair, letting his face rest there for a moment.

"I should've just came back with you. I tried to get to Reggie, I really did. But it was already too late and she wouldn't let me go to him. She wanted me to get the mark and marry Rosier, Regulus already has it. I couldn't help him." I cried softly into his shoulder as he smoothed my hair comfortingly.

"You're never going back there, they can't hurt you anymore. Regulus will be okay, he's welcome here if he decides to leave. But I'm here now, nothings going to hurt you when I'm around. I promise."

I nodded, allowing him to wipe the tears from my cheeks before leaning in to kiss him.

I was safe in his arms, in his bed, in his home. The looming knowledge of the war was pushed away by his room. The sense of home breaking my thoughts away from anything other than him.

Him and his soft hair, his infectious smile, his gentle laugh and his addictive touch.

"I love you so much." I said as his lips pulled away, resting my head against his and rubbing our noses together softly.

"I love you too"

#x reader #fanfiction #fanfic #harry potter #marauders x reader #sirius black #marauders #marauders era #hogwarts #james potter x reader #james potter #regulus black #house of black

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