#But… i can imagine these small steps towards self forgiveness
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Leave-taking (AFAB Adrian x GN Reader)
Request: Would you do a sub afab alucard drabble?
Request: My obsession towards Alucard came back. Can i request the first time fem!dom reader and him have sex? I imagine that sex would be all about him, praising him, making him feel good, safe and comfortable in her arms due to his trauma. Aaa i want to make my baby boy feel good and and and---
Summary: Adrian does not flinch when your hand cups his face, nor does he resist when you lift his face. It is then that he allows himself to look “Well too late for that, I think I lost whatever sanity I had when you left,”
Warning: AFAB Adrian, dom reader, vaginal fingering and sex. Minors DNI.
AN: okay bros and hoes this is first time I have written actual intercourse. Hope you like it. Thanks for requesting.
“What makes you think you can make a choice for both of us?” Adrian does not find the strength to move from his spot from where your gaze pins him. The room remains quiet leave for the slight shuffle of papers you move around. Adrian fails to find words to answer your question.
Slamming your hand in frustration you stand up from your desk. Your chair pushed back with more than the required force crashes into the wall. “Tell me Adrian, what made you think, you could leave without a word, without a single mention, not a word of your well-being,” With every word you step closer. “Vanishing into thin air, making me lose my mind worrying about you,” you are close now. Adrian still unable to look into your eyes, evades your gaze by looking at the floor.
For once the dhampir feels more prey than predator. Adrian does not flinch when your hand cups his face, nor does he resist when you lift his face. It is then that he allows himself to look “Well too late for that, I think I lost whatever sanity I had when you left,” your dilated pupils stare back at him. There is no sign of the familiar brown he remembered.
“You took it all with you,” you whisper as you close in and Adrian bumps into the wall behind him. Even with your eyes tinged red and your hair, which you meticulously looked after in the past, now in disarray, Adrian’s heart skips a beat.
"You took it all with you," you repeat, your voice filled with a mixture of longing and accusation. The weight of your words hits him hard, and he finds himself pressed against the wall, unable to escape your penetrating gaze.
A momentary softness that he enjoys as you lean in. Your hand that holds his chin travels the path of his cheek to his hair where your fingers run through his hair. Your scent floods his senses. Too long. Your breath on the column of his neck settles like the sand on the seabed. Your lips hair’s width away from where they should be.
Adrian closes his eyes and waits for whatever punishment awaits him. He would bear it all if it gave him your forgiveness. But it never comes. Your touch, the warmth of your breath, your scent all leave him.
Opening his eyes he finds you withdrawn. Away from the previous closeness. The skin of his neck tingles in anticipation, waiting for your lips. Your rejection pinches his heart. A small moment that leaves him gasping. “You are free to go,” he does not register the words you speak with your back to him. Leave…no you’ve just met. How could…Adrian cannot fathom doing that again.
“I have made sure of your safety and that is all I need,” you continue and it is then that Adrian notices the tenseness of your shoulders and the slight tremor of your voice. A strong front for him. A choice given at your own cost.
A love given so freely that it expects nothing in return. A love that keeps you looking for him for months on end but it is the same love that allows you to back down at the expense of your own happiness. So selfless in its existence.
Accompanied by guilt, self-blame, a sense of fondness fills Adrian’s heart. He had been so wrong. Every construct of his mind that sprung from his past trauma lay useless in front of you. How did he ever think of you as those who betrayed him long ago? How had shadows of his mind not seen what you truly were? All those months how did he not discern the truth?
“Forgive me,” Adrian is surprised when his voice comes out firm, unlike the turmoil of his mind. Reaching for your hand Adrian steps forward to face you. Your balled fist unraveling in his hands. So…cold. Long ago you told him about getting cold fingertips when nervous. You look back at him. So, resilient yet, so fragile at the same time.
Taking your hand Adrian rests it on his cheek. “My fears and my doubts led me to take this step. I did not mean it to hurt you and yet, I have. I have hurt you so much.” Adrian puts all his sincerity as he holds onto your hand. “I wanted to keep you away from the darkness that follows me everywhere I go but in doing so I wronged you.”
Even in your state, you shake your head in denial. Adrian’s heart flutters your thumb caresses the skin of his cheek. A motion efficient enough to unwind him from the long months of running away from your comfort. You give it so freely that it is easy to feel unworthy of it. “Are you sure?” your voice is quiet and full of caution.
Adrian does not reply and merely closes his eyes as he kisses your lips. A kiss that is full of uncertainty and caution that grows stronger that your hands bring him closer. Your arms wrap around him Adrian feels his feet buckle in relief. Adrian feels your shoulders lose their rigidity as his arms circle them.
Your movements are rough and impatient and Adrian cannot find in himself to complain. He complies as you push yourself into him. Desperation fills you both as if the world had been lit on fire.
Your arm snakes around his waist, pulling him closer as your tongue pries open his lips. A request he happily acquiesces to, allowing you to claim what remains yours. Funny how the love that cannot be won with all the powers in the world comes just with the ability to let it go.
Maybe that is why even the teasing nips of your teeth on his lips are pleasurable. It is brimming with love no matter how he sees it. So, Adrian lets himself fall. Let all the worries and burdens go away as you hold him so close.
The kiss is cut short and Adrian whines. The emptiness seems unbearable after so long. He tries to reach for you, his eyes clouded by his own tears at the loss. ‘Sorry,’ he aches to plead. He wants to make it right so bad. Beg you and reassure you. Anxiety floods his mind as scenarios of your rejection plague him. The peaceful trance from moments ago is now disrupted.
“I am here beloved,” your voice reaches him and so does your touch. “Right here,” you speak as he feels his own hand in yours. And then he feels the beat of your heart under his palm that you guide to your chest.
“Right here,” your voice rings closer as your forehead rests on his. “I got you, love,” you reply to his whimper as you gently kiss his unfocused eyes, his cheeks, his lips. Adrian’s hands remain feeling your heartbeat as your fingers free him of his shirt.
He is too far gone to notice how you appreciatively take his appearance in. Even feel the shift from the cold wall to the warmer wood of your desk next to the fireplace. Your hands guide him, to where, he does not know, he merely remains in your embrace.
And then your lips finally kiss where you had earlier stopped. The place on his neck that had been ever since craving for your touch. Warmth pools in Adrian’s stomach as you kiss the spot and suck on it taking all your time. Your hands alternate between rubbing his exposed back and running fingers through his hair.
“Adrian,” you call his name reassuring him of your presence. You feared all this was too quick, both of you were too riled up but Adrian…he seemed so vulnerable, so soft in the moment. Making him comfortable on your desk, the only piece of surviving furniture in the dingy inn you rented. Had you known, you would have prepared better. Cushions, blankets, or maybe even something to eat but things had to wait. You would not deny your lover of any comfort.
The passion that burned you for months now simmered into pure affection. You run your hands all over his exposed skin, cementing his presence, differentiating the moment from countless visions that haunted you.
Standing between Adrian’s legs, you crouch lower, and Adrian’s fingers grip your hair. His grasp barely holding on as completely undress him from the layers that separate you both. “Oh look at you love. So eager for me,” you chuckle and Adrian’s knees tighten around your shoulder. “Look at you, Adrian so wet just from kissing,” your fingers glide over his exposed folds. Barely touching but the tremor that runs through your lover is enough proof of his sensitivity.
“Did you truly think anyone else could make you feel this good?” Your question is answered by a moan followed by Adrian’s nails scratching the top of your shoulders. Standing back up you catching his mouth back in a kiss as your fingers are enveloped by his warmth. Tight and pulsating as you scissor him open.
Adrian grinds back with his movements eager and urgent. “Mmmh,” is all he can summon at the annoyance of finding your shirt still on. His frustration lost in the daze of pleasure. His hips buck into your fingers trying to create more friction even as you increase the number of fingers opening him open. “Please ahh…need…more ahh,” a disappointed whine leaves his mouth as your fingers leave him open and empty. Exposed to cold.
However, his moans are muffled as your fingers fill his mouth. “Look what I do to you and look what you did to me,” you pull his hair back as Adrian continues sucking on your fingers. Uncaring of the drool that leaves his mouth making a mess of both of you. His fangs glide your fingers making you arch into him.
And then you press into him, enjoying the tightness that welcomes you. You grind into the spots that you remember pleasuring him in the past. Your movements are frantic after a long time of your separation.
In a rushed rhythm, you continue your game of push and pull. The table creaks with your force but you pay no mind to it. Your arm circles Adrian’s back holding him close. Adrian’s nails dig into your back as his moans fill the room and you do not doubt that the entire corridor rings with your noises.
Lost in the trance of building pleasure Adrian falls back on the desk as you continue drilling into him. Driving him into the haze of everything yet, nothing.
You lean in kissing the evident marks on Adrian’s neck. Reveling in your claim on him and your rock you both into another orgasm. Both your climaxes build together as you hold him close despite the sweat that lines your bodies.
#alucard#alucard x reader#castlevania#adrian tepes#top reader#adrian tepes x reader#bottom alucard#sub alucard#gentle sex#afab Alucard#dom reader
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In other news- because tbh this other au holds more meaning in my heart (just cuz of how I relate to Donnie the most out of all of the aus), I genuinely am craving for angst with hurt/comfort for Leo Jr au.
sooo time for THOUGHTS
I really am longing for moments with Leo Jr and Donnie, because...hnk- Donnie actually receiving comfort, care, patient understanding and acceptance instead of being told to suck it up or being ridiculed/treated like a ticking time bomb???? Means the world to me????? Idk- I guess my soul just aches for this version of Donnie who didn't get that safe space Leonardo's Donnie did. (i get the au is mainly Leo-centric, but for some reason this version of Don-tron ya created has somehow wormed his way into my heart and he is truly my favorite iteration in terms of aus???)
When I tell you that I felt my heart break over the silly comic where Leonardo says that Leo Jr and Casey Jr are twins, solely due to what that implies to the overall story. In a sense, Leo Jr gets to have variations of the life he would have if he hadn't been kidnapped (by all technicalities Leo Jr IS a victim of kidnapping no matter how wholesome it turned out to be). He gets to know the joys of having a twin, of being able to goof around and laugh, being understood/accepted, being able to make friends and be a kid! Meanwhile...Donnie (the one who was MEANT to have Leo as his twin) didn't get any of that. It hit hard that, even if it wasn't intentional by any means, Don was "easily replaced." (which idk if it's intentional or not, but that seems to be a reoccurring theme for the spiny softshell in this au).
He'll never really have that close knit bond, not know what it's like, even if Leo Jr and him do grow close during their teenage years. Because in this reality, the "Disaster Twins" exist, Donnie's just not apart of it. Which is just another way that shows how much of a stranger the kid is to everyone who is supposed to be his family; his father, two brothers, and even the one who was at one point meant to be his twin.
That thought is sorta what led me down the rabbit hole of Leo Jr AU! Don brainrot. The kid's reality is one of neglect, extreme isolation, fear and...probably a deep well of self-hatred, loneliness, non existent self-worth, etc. (we saw how he struggled with in Rise Canon, so i can only imagine it is so much worse in this au). I can only imagine that this also impacts his ninpo and mystics later on, which probably is going to make his self-esteem take a nosedive.
Ngl if Leonardo's twin (who I'm gonna call Tello) is actually watching over his past self, it makes me wonder what he's thinking. His pov would be intriguing consider he'd be witnessing how much pain his twin's actions caused. Idk- I just- when I look at everything from this particular au, it makes me hope that Donnie is allowed to feel his big feelings without people trying to rush him. He should be allowed to be terrified, hurt, angry, etc towards Splinter and Leonardo. Neither of them deserve his forgiveness, because shit- both of them fucked up big time. They both caused complex trauma...and like- really need to face consequences. (apart of me sorta hopes Donnie DOESN'T forgive them)
dakjsfsadfas sorry for rambling, not sure if any of that made sense, but I just- I have so many feelings about Donnie in the Leo Jr au, and really want to see more of him!
The sewers were a gross place to live if you asked Junior but Splinter refused to move to the hidden city. Luckily he had his portals meaning he could step into the already cleaned portion they called a home.
“Leo!” Mikey was the first to notice him. Dropping the plates on the table he was setting them vaulting over it, “You came!”
“It’s still Junior,” He reminded for the umpteenth time, “And yeah I said I would,”
Mikey collided into him for a hug. Junior gave a small wave to Raph- or Red, probably Red as the snapper wasn’t meeting his eyes while trying to hide his scowl. Splinter was setting the table in Mikeys stead, making wayyy too much eye contact as he kept staring at Junior. He was placing the plates down carelessly. The one in front of Donnie was placed down with a crack, only Junior caught his flinch.
“Great, he’s here, I saw him,” Donnie pushed away from the table in a frenzied movement, “Can I please leave now,”
“Purple your brother is here, that is more important than some computer,” Splinter snapped. No one took note of the way both Donnie and Junior cringed.
“Nah he’s just tryna get out of showing me his lab since he promised last time,” Junior stepped forward and away from Mikey.
“I did no such thing,” Donnie scowled at him as Junior came around to his side,
“No use backing out now Dee,” Junior grinned, shuffling towards Donnie so the softshell backed away. Kind of like herding a very liable to bite sheep, “I’m expecting the grand tour, don't wait up everyone! “
But dinner…” Junior pretended he didn’t hear Mikey as he walked Donnie towards his room office lab space.
It was empty, with sections obviously organized out to put things there but with not enough actual stuff to do it. Donnie held himself like a tightly drawn string as they walked in. Not looking at Junior as the red slider circled around to the other's bed.
“What did you want to see?” Donnie asked tiredly as Junior came up behind him, “Most of my stuff is at the old place, or the other old place, or-”
Donnie was cut off by the blanket being draped over his head like a tablecloth.
“Nothing much,” Junior shrugged stepping away as Donnie went very still under the blanket, “Just had to get out of there, think I might sit quietly against a wall for the next half hour, not say anything, not do anything, you know how it is,”
Junior slid down the wall. He would have to go back eventually, or the others would break down the door and pull them both back to dinner. He estimated he had about thirty six minutes before that happened and that he could convince them to leave Donnie be. He’d say he asked if the softshell could make something for him. Something big so Donnie would have an excuse to disappear for the next week or so. They tended not to bother the other turtle as much if they thought he was doing stuff for the yokai.
The blanket shuffled, bunching up on the ground as Donnie sat near him. Only just within arms reach. He was covered head to toe, curled up and completely silent. Junior occupied himself trying to come up with a believable project. Maybe a new mask? That way he could wear his old one and the others would never know, it’s not like Splinter ever let them follow Junior to the battle nexus.
The blanket shifted but Donnie didn’t emerge. A hand poked out the bottom, listing up the cloth and bunching it up while still keeping the soft shell hidden. Junior reached his hand out halfway. Donnie couldn't see it but paused when his searching hand brushed up against it. Junior kept still, waiting, not minding one way or the other.
Donnie held his fingers, squeezing lightly. Junior squeezed back, not taking Donnie’s whole hand but meeting him where he was. It was pleasant, it was quiet. The noise from the others blocked off. A little bubble away from everything where they could just be.
Junior thought growing up in the sewers may have not been all bad… if he got to do it with Donnie.
#I've been thinking about this ask all week!#but I had work and helping my roomate put on a show so litrally no time!#I wanted to make a full comic but a ficlet and one drawing will have to do#totally not having feelings bout you connecting with a character heavily based off my own experiences#no sir'ree#(I appreciate the other ask too but I need to post another part before we can get to that)#leo junior au#disaster twins#rottmnt
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do you write smut fics too cause i'd really enjoy a fic with jealous zemo🥺
Only Mine (Baron Zemo x Female!Reader)
Summary: After the meeting with Selby in Madripoor Zemo needs to remind you of who you belong to.
Word Count: 2.3k
18+ ONLY MINORS DNI
General Tags: Smut, Explicit, PWP, Daddy Kink, D/s Undertones, Oral (male receiving, female giving), Face Fucking, Thigh Riding, Degradation (name calling and demeaning language), Light Choking, Dirty Talk, Use of Force/Restraints, Rough Fucking
Note: This thing took up 18 pages in my notes app good lord. I had fun writing this from the usual jealousy in Madripoor trope with Zemo though. I got carried away and made him go somewhat feral lmao. This is not a soft possessive fuck, this is an angry "you are MINE" kind of possessive fuck. Hope y'all enjoy. ;)
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───
"The breadcrumbs you can have for free, but the bakery will cost you, Baron. And before you can get all cute, you can't find Nagel without me."
Zemo had already agreed to pass ownership of the Winter Soldier to the woman across from him. He began to think of what else she could be after. "I have given you HYDRA's greatest asset, Selby. What more could you want?"
(Y/n) had agreed to go along with Zemo's plan of putting her in the role as his arm candy. She sat in his lap snuggled up to him as his hand absentmindedly traced patterns against the exposed skin of her thighs. The (hair color) squirmed slightly when his hand roamed higher to slide under the already short fabric of the dress.
Zemo had bought a rather expensive but skimpy outfit for her to wear. It was a short, tight red dress that hugged the form and left nothing to the imagination paired with black velvet heels. The dress had a corset decorating the front, keeping her waist cinched and her figure more hourglass. The demand that came next didn't surprise him when Selby had spoken again.
"I want your other toy, Zemo."
Selby looked over (Y/n) with a gaze that screamed nothing but hungry predator. Zemo hummed, his gloved hand reached and grasped her chin before pushing the now utterly helpless bait to stand in front of him. "Go on, Draga. Show our friend a good time." The Baron looked back up at her as he spoke with an indifferent look crossing his features.
(Y/n) stood for a moment in front of Selby, silent and unsure. "Strip. Make it interesting." She barked. The woman felt uneasy with the situation already. "That was an order. Did your handler here not teach you to obey?"
A darkness began to consume Zemo's eyes as he watched this little charade of a mission. A violent, horrible feeling made his grip on the arms of the chair tighten and the gloves to give a soft squeaking noise.
"Forgive me, ma'am." (Y/n) reached up to the bow that held the corset lacing of the dress drawn together and pulled it free. She took small steps towards Selby as the lacing was removed. By the time she was straddling the older woman's lap the dress's front was completely open, a beautiful lace bralette was the only thing that protected her from being truly topless. (Y/n) had to commit if this was going to work.
She wanted to throw up.
Zemo had reduced her to nothing but another pawn to be handed to Selby like a cheap whore.
She giggled with fake shyness as Selby pushed the dress to pool at (Y/n)'s middle. (Y/n) finally removed the dress completely to reveal matching lace panties. The set was white, much like Zemo's knuckles were under the protection of his gloves. She sat more up on her knees and dipped her head to rest in the crook of the other's neck. Zemo's breathing was deep and deliberate as he watched on.
(Y/n) needed to be praised for her dedication to the part to make this work - but at what cost? Helmut Zemo's self-control, it seemed.
(Y/n) sighed softly, the end of the noise made her sound needy and pliant as the Baron watched the other woman grip her waist with a possessive edge.
When Sam's phone rang, the room fell silent as Selby stopped her movements. "A moment, beautiful."
Bucky caught her eye and flashed a curt nod of feeling equally as awful in their respective positions. Zemo ran through numbers in his head to keep himself from rising and ripping her from Selby's grip and covering her with his coat.
"Answer it." Selby's voice was cold. "On speaker phone." Leave it to Sam 'I-Don't-Put-My-Phone-On-Silent-During-An-Undercover-Op' Wilson to blow their cover, truly a stellar display for an experienced Avenger.
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───
"Are you joining us for the party?" Sharon asked as she ran a hand through her hair. "I'll pass. I want to be alone. I need a while." (Y/n) didn't hesitate in taking her retreat to the room Sharon had given her. She was angry at Zemo for giving her over like that, forcing her to play a more extreme character than what was already being pushed at her.
Zemo returned from the party soon after she had left for her room. "Where is (Y/n)?" He asked Sharon while taking a sip of the whiskey still in his hand. All she did was point to her room.
The Sokovian knocked once. Then twice. Now a third time. He pinched the bridge of his nose, his patience wearing dangerously thin as his mind was still reeling from the incident with Selby. When no answer was given Zemo opened the door and walked into the bedroom, having shut the door behind him. "(Y/n)-"
"Fuck off, Zemo. You're the last person I want to see."
"That's no way to greet your handler, is it Draga?" Zemo was a stubborn, manipulative bastard. His aura alone drew the girl to him like a magnet. "You're not my fucking handler. Fuck. Off."
Zemo stalked closer. In seemingly one quick movement he had one hand holding (Y/n)'s wrists behind her back while the other hand gripped the back of her neck. She drew in a ragged breath as he pushed the girl back down and ripped the robe off of her body to discard it on the floor.
"What was that Draga?"
(Y/n) whimpered into the mattress in reply. She was again only covered by her undergarments. The sudden shift made her go soft. The possession in his grip was obvious, and it spoke to a need rising within her.
Zemo hummed in approval as he took the hand off of her neck to undo his belt and slide it out of the belt loops. "I must say Dušica, you committed to your role beautifully." (Y/n)'s brain clouded with the sound of his praise. "With doing this I hope to remind you of who you were supposed to belong to. You seemed to be having so much fun with Selby."
(Y/n) gasped quietly at the feeling of the leather gathering her wrists and holding her still. Zemo admired his work for a moment before he leaned forward, his body covering her back. The Baron nosed at her shoulder as he kissed every bit of skin that was offered to him.
"You're going to be making it up to me." He whispered as he nipped at her skin. "On your knees in front of me. You are going to let me use that pretty little mouth until you're choking on my cock."
When he stepped away (Y/n) seemed to scramble. The anger had burned away underneath the calm authority Zemo always embodied. She sought the steadiness of his control. It was sure. It was comforting. He was always comforting in that way.
Her attention was drawn back to the task at hand when Zemo unbuttoned his trousers with deft fingers. (Y/n) could already see how his cock was straining against the fabric keeping it out of sight. She shifted on her knees when Zemo forced a foot between her thighs.
"Stay just like this. If you want to act like a whore in front of me then you'll keep your legs spread like one." (Y/n)'s eyes peered up at the brunette through long lashes.
"Yes Daddy."
Zemo felt the air leave his lungs in a low groan. Lightening fast his cock was freed and rested against the woman's lips. "Open up Draga, Daddy wants to see how much of his cock you can swallow." Her lips opened and Zemo was hit with the sinful warmth of her tongue flattening to taste as much of him as possible as he fed her every inch. "Good girl." He praised softly. (Y/n) moaned around his cock, her jaw went slack and her breathing became forced as she settled just an inch away from the base of it. Her pretty white panties were going to be wrecked by the end of the night, and Zemo wanted to see it.
Zemo carded his fingers through (Y/n)'s (hair color) locks to soothe her as he eased himself back out. "Don't move. Keep your jaw relaxed. Daddy's going to make sure you can't talk tomorrow my darling."
With a handful of her hair Zemo thrusted back into the soft wet heat of (Y/n)'s mouth with brutal force. (Y/n) sputtered and gagged from the violent nature of his movement as her core throbbed at the sound of Zemo biting down a groan. "Beautiful. A perfect cocksleeve, aren't you baby?" He repeated his motion with the same violent possession burning through his system.
(Y/n) choked with every push and pull of her head meeting Zemo's punishing thrusts. Tears stained her face as the Baron groaned and moaned out soft praises at the feeling of her throat spasming and swallowing around his length. It made his head fog with a manic pleasure as (Y/n) began to feel the effects of her lack of oxygen between Zemo's rough rutting into her pliant mouth.
It's just as violent of a movement as the rest when Zemo is suddenly pulling his cock out of (Y/n)'s throat with a louder moan.
"You feel so good Draga. Took my cock so well in that sinful mouth of yours." His pupils were blown and eyes dark, a single band of his brown honeyed eyes threatening to snap with even one wrong move. He watched with quiet amusement as (Y/n) coughed violently as her lungs gulped down all of the air they could get. Spit had dripped from her mouth down her chin and onto the floor where her legs were still apart. He pushed her shoulder down until the fabric covering her throbbing pussy rested against his shoe where he had stuck his leg out. "Fuck yourself while I finish. If I'm satisfied I may even let you come soon."
(Y/n) sobbed when Zemo forcefully yanked her head back to look straight up at him. "What are you supposed to say when I give you an order?"
"Yes Daddy!" She cried with a soft, hoarse voice as her hips rutted against his Oxford. The laces against her swollen clit was good, but it wasn't enough with the sticky fabric of her panties in the way.
"You may be a pathetic slut but I would think you'd still have your proper manners for your Daddy." The hand holding her head back let go and returned to its place jerking his cock with quick movements. "Open your mouth."
When (Y/n)'s mouth opened she was met with the warmth of Zemo's come as it hit her face, her lips, and on her outstretched tongue. He tasted salty, but somehow sugary sweet in her mouth and she wanted more.
The woman rutted even harder against his shoe before she was grabbed by her abused throat and hauled up onto her shaking legs. Her knees buckled, and would've slammed against the floor if not for Zemo's (thankfully) firm grip on her. "Look at the mess you made of my shoe." The laces down to the toe of the Baron's shoe glistened under the dim light of the room. (Y/n) could feel how her underwear stuck uncomfortably against her and whined at the feeling.
"Shh little one," Zemo hushed as he adjusted himself and walked them to one of the plush chairs in the room. "You've been so good, taking me so well. There we go, back on your knees. Turn around sweetheart." His voice softened significantly as he unfastened the belt and let her hands free. "Up on three Draga. One...two...three." (Y/n) was lifted again and adjusted to straddle one on of the Baron's thighs. She rocked against him with short movements.
"You can touch me, Dušica. Would you like your underwear off honey?" She nodded shyly while her hands wandered to grip Zemo's broad shoulders and find purchase in the knitted fabric of his turtleneck. She didn't expect Zemo to pull out a pocket knife and cut the ruined fabric right off of her hips.
"Daddy!" She whined and buried her face in his chest out of embarrassment when he held the now scrap of fabric up to inspect it.
"Absolutely ruined." He leaned down to place a soft kiss to (Y/n)'s hair. "You can move Ljubav. You may come when you want my sweet." (Y/n) braced herself once more. Zemo lifted his leg upwards as she ground her hips against it. The fabric of Zemo's pants were a bit scratchy against her inner thighs and added to the friction on her clit.
Soft "Ah- Ah- Ah-"'s filled the room while (Y/n) fucked herself against the Baron in ernest. Zemo pressed feverish kisses against his lover's neck when her pace picked up and her cries grew in volume. He lowered a hand from her hips to seek out the sensitive bud. "Let go Kleiner. Come for Daddy. Tell them all who you belong to."
(Y/n) arched her back as she ground her hips again as hard as she could when Zemo's thumb drew tight circles around her clit and the other moved to grasp her throat. He squeezed it. It wasn't enough to hurt (Y/n), but just enough to cut off her air. With a sharp cry (Y/n) came, her voice high and airy as she moaned. "Helmut-" Her pussy clenched around nothing while Zemo didn't let up with his stimulation to help her ride out the high. "Helmut- Daddyyy-" The girl babbled softly while trying to move away as the oversensitivity set in like a vice.
"I hear you Draga. My beautiful girl, Selby would have only dreamed of seeing you fall apart like that." Zemo felt powerful having gotten more than she had ever bargained for in the first place. He grounded (Y/n) with a soft kiss to her lips.
Zemo carried (Y/n) back over to the large bed before he stepped into the bathroom to retrieve a warm washcloth and lotion. "Let's get you cleaned up, meine Liebe."
#baron zemo#baron zemo x reader#daniel bruhl#helmut zemo x reader#the danny bunch#helmut zemo#daniel bruhl x reader#marvel#marvel fanfiction#marvel x reader#the falcon and the winter soldier#tfatws#ca:cw#captain america: civil war#baron helmut zemo#answered
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triple
pairings: marc spector x figure skater!reader , steven grant x figure skater!reader
desc: maybe it was cliché, but as long as you had your boys cheering you on, you didn’t need a gold medal. it would be pretty good to win, though.
warnings: par of the course skating injury, swearing, smoking, cheesy but who cares i just love my boys ok, sex mentions and an innuendo if you squint
a/n: am i self indulging as a failed figure skater? maybe. shush. also this is the programme music and this is the dress i imagined (yuna kim ily). forgive my absolutely terrible attempt at trying to describe jump entries☠️ they’re easier to do than to describe
masterlist
you hit the ice with a smack, landing flat on your ass. you don’t get up - just stare at the ceiling, only silver grey tarpaulin and air conditioning fans looking back.
sighing, you push yourself onto your elbows and up again, skates pushing you towards the barrier.
“i think i know what your problem is,” your coach smiles. “confidence.”
“oh for fucks sake, brian.” you laugh. “really?”
“yes,” he nods vigorously. “i’m serious. your entry is perfect, your check is great, in air it’s amazing, but as soon as you go in for that third rotation - fall. give me a two doubles, an euler and a triple toe.”
you nod, pushing yourself backwards off of the barrier. less that twenty four hours from competition and you still weren’t landing your highest scoring element - the triple axel. the axel was the hardest jump, no debate needed.
why? well, as you had explained to steven on the third date;
“well, normally on jumps you take of backwards, right? and you land backwards as well, so rotation wise, you only have to do a full number - say three. but with the axel, you take of forwards, so you need to do an extra half rotation to land. most people who do triple axels can do quads, because it’s only a half rotation off.”
even though steven had looked at you like you’d spoken a foreign language, he and marc had soon began to understand almost every skating term. hell - you thought they might get it better than you sometimes.
taking a deep breath, you turned to backwards, hearing your edges crunch the ice underneath.
cross, cross, check, jump, land.
you would be able to recite those four words in your sleep, with the amount of times you had jumped in the last week.
checking behind you, you crossed your feet, feeling the speed pick up. cross, cross. you raised your foot into position, just above your ankle. feeling your edge curve, you looked behind you again and stepped forward into the other foot. check.
knowing you had to be quick as to not lose valuable speed, you pulled your arms out in front of you and pressed your toepick into the ice. jump.
although jumps looked fast to people watching, they felt ten times faster. fun fact: figure skaters are only in the air for around half a second. in that time, they have to pull their arms in (or pull them above their head for extra points), cross their feet, rotate at least once and get into landing position. sounds easy, right?
the world spun around you, but before you even knew it, your boot hit the ice once again, small crystals flying into the air. land. you held landing position for a few seconds - backwards on once leg with the other stretched out behind you - before beginning the process once again.
cross, cross, check, jump, land.
the second axel was easier than the first, the euler was something you could do in your sleep, and the toeloop (your personal favourite jump) getting higher with every season.
brian clapped from the other side of the barrier, smiling as you made your way over to him.
“well, it was perfect,” he beamed. “but you’ll be glad to know, your axels were over-rotated. the triple is most definitely within reach.”
you raised your eyebrows, reaching for the water bottle beside him. “how over-rotated?”
“tough to say,” he said as you took a drink. “but you were on the wrong edge when you landed - i saw that switch from inside to outside. it’s about a quarter rotation, i think. bad news if you were trying for the double but, well, you could probably do them in your sleep.”
you smiled, sighing as you turned around to look at the ice behind you. it was empty - which considering it was two hours since the rink closed, you weren’t surprised.
“do you think i’ll get it for tomorrow?”
brian nodded. “i think so. you’ve landed it twice out of seventeen times, which isn’t bad, considering this is one of the hardest jumps.”
you hummed. “did nathan chen land it yet? the quad?”
“almost, but yuzuru hanyu is closer, i think. he got the first recorded one at the olympics.”
the thought of attempting a quadruple axel terrified you, the idea of girls half your age trying to land it scaring you even more.
“should i try again?”
“go for it.”
-
the red numbers were in the corner of your eye; eleven fifty seven. the rink closer three hours ago now, and you were grateful to the owners. they were more than accommodating, considering you were in a foreign country and training against half of europe. but they had insisted - being from your home country as well - that you were such a good representative, you could train there whenever you were there, as long as you were in the country for the competition.
it wasn’t a popular rink, being about four miles away from the hotel everyone was staying in, everyone else opted to train in the rink designated to the skaters, but it was far too busy for your liking, and there was absolutely nothing that said you couldn’t train separately - you had tripled checked the ISU’s rule book.
now having attempted the triple twenty eight times, your land total had went up to five - you were getting stronger. more stable, and even more focused.
the most important competition of your season was less than fifteen hours away. worlds. the season was almost over, and every single time, worlds fell close to the end.
it had been a rough olympic cycle this year, but you were lucky to have been chosen to represent your country. you hadn’t medalled - not that you predicted too - but you had placed much higher than you expected too. sixth. out of everyone there, you had placed sixth.
a miracle, no doubt, considering you had no triple axel. yes, you had a quad toeloop, loop, salchow and flip, but half of the girls there were as close as hanyu and chen to landing the quad axel.
somehow, your artistic skills bumped up your total significantly, what you lacked in technical you certainly made up for in stage presence.
coming sixth at the olympics was a huge deal for you. it put your career in a completely different light, people now actually talking about your skating. brand deals, awards, all of it. it was so much - everything you’d ever wanted.
but it pushed the realisation that you had to stop delaying the inevitable. triple axel could not wait any longer, just as brian had said to you. if you could get this jump at worlds, you were sure you’d medal.
you ran a hand through your hair, mindlessly typing with your other hand. replying to comments and messages seemed to become a full time job.
checking the time once more - midnight - you moved to spotify, looking for your programme music one last time.
“i’m gonna run through again, ok? can you play this for me, please?”
“sure,” brian walked over to you and plugged your phone into the aux.
skating to the centre of the ice, you didn’t notice that behind you, someone else was watching.
you got into position, taking a few deep breaths before the song started, filling the entire rink with noise.
one, two, three, four, five, six, go.
what could you say about the music choice? you were a sucker for fall out boy.
the programme steps were almost imbedded in you by this point, this being the more important programme in your opinion. you skated two different routines, the first being the short programme, lasting a maximum of two minutes and forty seconds. quads weren’t allowed in the short, so the free - this one - was loaded with them.
free programmes - or long programmes - lasted a maximum of four minutes, being a chance to really zone in on the artistry as well as physical components.
it felt like your feet were taking you skating, you body being completely submitted to the music and the steps coinciding with them.
you were at least two minutes in now, you has a spin and three jumps out of the way. here came the axel.
cross, cross, check, jump, land. 
cross, cross, check, jump-
the ice was cold against your hands, banging your bones together with such force you thought they might bang the ice back. fuck, you thought. fuck. 
getting up as soon as you could, you stepped back into your routine, trying to push yourself even more than before the fall.
your spins felt faster than normal - although you couldn’t tell. they always felt like you were going a hundred miles an hour, when in reality you were barely moving at all.
you could hear the music coming to an end, your step sequence bouncing across the ice and back into the centre.
spinning one last time, you scratched against the ice - muscle memory bring you to your finishing pose.
you didn’t bother holding it for long, letting your shoulders drop and head hand. brian clapped from behind the barriers, but there was more than one person clapping.
turning to the source, you saw… steven (his hair was parted in steven’s way), beaming at you from across the rink.
“that was amazing!” definitely steven, the accent cut its way through the space.
you couldn’t help but smile back. “can’t seem to get that fuckin’ triple though, can i?”
“y/n, relax,” brian yelled. “even if you don’t land it tomorrow, you technical and presentation will put you in the top ten.”
“but that’s not a medal, is it?” you didn’t mean to snap at him. you really didn’t. but considering it was the day of the competition, and your triple axel was still unstable, you were sure he’d understand why you were antsy.
brian sighed, understanding perfectly why you were agitated. “you’ll get it. i know you will. now, go home, get some rest. you need to be at the rink for twelve tomorrow.”
you clicked your tongue, nodding slowly as you skated towards the barrier and back off the ice, the feeling of solid floor strange underneath your feet.
steven held your skate bag in one hand and shoes in the other, bringing them over to where you sat on the benches. his lopsided smile almost made your heart melt - you were so damn lucky.
“tough session?” he says down next to you, handing you the bag.
“understatement,” you mumbled. “thirty times i’ve tried for that triple axel, only landed it about a third of that.”
“better than never, though, innit?” steven rubbed his hand along your lower back as you untied your skates.
you didn’t answer, only humming in response. you pulled your guards on, and tossed your skates into the bag haphazardly.
“what’s up?”
looking at steven, you could see the concern on his face. “it’s just- these girls, these fifteen year old girls, they have the triple. fuck - they do triple axels for a warmup!”
steven opened his mouth to respond, but before he could speak he glanced at the glass behind you, your faint reflection staring back at you.
“god,” you looked back. “do i even want to know?”
“he said,” steven was almost laughing. “he said that he would happily tonya harding them for you.”
“oh, for fucks sake.”
it made you laugh, though. and when you started laughing, you couldn’t stop laughing. for at least a minute, you sat giggling like a little girl, shoes half on.
when you finally stopped laughing, you checked the time again - almost half past twelve.
“did you drive?” you asked steven, standing up and pulling your bag onto your shoulder, instantly feeling the strain in your back.
“yeah,” steven took the bag straight back off you. “have you eaten?”
you nodded.
“have you eaten a meal?” he rephrased.
you shook your head. “didn’t have time.”
“we can order mcdonald’s to the hotel.”
grinning at the thought, you yelled one final goodbye to brian.
“twelve, y/n! don’t be late!” he called. “and steven,”
you both turned around.
“don’t keep her up half the night, please. she’s skating tomorrow, so, make sure she can use her legs.”
giggling again while steven turned red, you grabbed his hand and pulled him out of the doors, cold night air hitting you straight in the face. since you were little, you always said ice rinks were not cold inside. there was air conditioning, for gods sake. underneath the ice was cold but why - why on earth - would it be cold inside?
you shivered when the air hit your skin, realising your tight training top might not have been enough coverage to face the night’s cold. you hoped steven wasn’t parked far away. you took your bag from him as he reached into his pocket for the keys.
“so, what hurts?” he asked, unlocking the car.
“fuck,” you opened the door and got in, dumping the bag at your feet. “what doesn’t hurt would be a shorter list.”
steven laughed; “give me an example.”
“well, my ass hurts like a bitch - thanks a lot, triple axel. my ankle hurts, i think i landed on it wrong or something. i need to put more tape on my shoulder as well, i was trying to do my spiral and i swear to god steven, it felt like the muscle was literally tearing apart.
“i don’t think it healed right from when i dislocated it last season, i’ll have to ask someone about that. then my hip, i fell on it. get this - it wasn’t even a good fall. i wasn’t jumping, i just - oh my god, it’s so embarrassing - i was doing my step sequence, yeah? at the bit with the twizzles, i just absolutely fucking decked it. like, literally straight on the floor. brian just about pissed himself laughing.
“could you imagine if i do that tomorrow? oh my god. i think i’d retire. i always tell the little kids at training, the ones who are only starting singles, that even the pros fall, but… fucking hell, i don’t think yuzuru hanyu casually trips up over twizzles.
“my hands are cut up, as well. i forgot to put my gloves in my bag, so there’s a bunch of little scratches and they burn like hell. i think i’m dehydrated as well, i only drank two bottles of water today. that’s not good, is it?
“oh, and i have a headache. and i’m hungry. and tired, and i missed my boys all day, so…”
you adored how steven just let you ramble. it felt so natural with him - like you opened your mouth and the words just came tumbling out.
“we’ve missed you, too,” he moved his spare hand to your thigh. “and falling on twizzles is exactly something yuzuru hanyu would do, i think.”
smiling, you looked at him. he was focused on the road, although there was barely any traffic. three years. three whole years you had been with him, but the first date still felt like yesterday.
it hadn’t been awkward, not necessarily, but you had been a little surprised when an english guy had shown up to a date you were convinced an american had asked you on. steven didn’t seem to recognise you, which surprised you even more, but you put that down to nerves.
but after he had totally ghosted you after the first date, it made you a little sad, sure, but you weren’t too affected by it. until he showed up at your flat a week later, the american accent making it’s return, and asked you out to dinner again - then and there.
you were lucky you didn’t have training, actually, because over that dinner he explained to you his situation - how he had DID and a few things needed taken care of, but he was back and extremely interested in you. marc was a little nervous to tell you about his mental state, but you had embraced it with open arms - how couldn’t you? both men were lovely in their own ways, about both were certainly your type.
so it had began there, and by date number six you were finally taken to bed, not by marc - but steven. it was perfect, the perfect night. the morning after he asked you to go out with him, and how could you say no?
what you didn’t see was marc’s face in the mirror that morning. his jaw was slack, staring at steven in slight disbelief. he was sure he would have been the one to get you into bed, the first time at least.
“you owe me a tenner, mate,” steven had mumbled, careful for you not to hear.
three whole years since that first time, you thought, staring at him.
he pulled into a parking space outside the hotel, making sure it was close to the entrance. god forbid his girl was cold.
before you could, steven picked up your bag for you again, and pressed a peck to your lips.
you were so goddamn lucky.
-
the rink was buzzing with spectators from all across the world, coming to see the skaters perform.
so far, you were taking a lead after the short programme. you were set to skate last in the free programme, but you knew you were only so far ahead because of your presentation abilities.
yes, every jump had landed well (sometimes with extra bonus points), but it was the step sequences and stage presence of yours that had the audience hooked on your every move. it seemed as though the judges were, too.
waiting for your group to be let on the ice was hellish, but the six minute warmup was hardly ever enough for you. normally, skaters who did poorly in the short programme skated first, in groups of five or six. so, being last to skate meant not only did you have to sit through all of their programmes, but everyone else in your groups.
everyone who had their triple axel.
unzipping your countries training jacket, you smoothed down your dress.
it was exactly how your programme sounded - elegant and sultry, but flirty and fun, sure to captivate the audience. that’s how the designer put it, anyway.
the dress was mainly black, with a red layer underneath that matched the diamantés that came from a sheer black sleeve on the right side, up to your neck, and fell like a waterfall.
your hair was down - something most skaters didn’t do. but then again, you weren’t most skaters.
only getting to attempt the axel a few times before the six minutes was up, your success rate still didn’t look favourable. you popped one, rotating twice before giving up, fell out of another and you weren’t even brave enough to try the third, turning it into a quad toeloop instead.
the announcer called that the six minutes was up, and you skated around the rink one last time before stepping off and over to brian.
“i need to take it out,” you mumbled, putting your guards on and slipping your jacket over your shoulders.
“if you need to, yes. replace it with a quad salchow.”
you nodded, eyes darting around the room, falling on… how was his hair done? oh, marc. he waved to you, smiling. you waved back, interrupted by the announcement of who was skating.
her music was classical, romeo and juliet. the programme was good until her fourth jump, where she fell. you hated that you were relieved, but that’s the way it was in sports. but, another part of you was relieved that someone else in your group fell, and you wouldn’t be the only one.
the four minutes went by quicker than you would have hoped, giving you no time to think until you were fourth in the que to skate.
“one hundred and twelve point seven two.” her score was announced, the electronic board moving her name into first place.
you took a deep breath. gold seeming far out of your reach by this point, all three girls in front of you had steady, stable, reliable triple axels. and all their quads.
i am fucked, you thought, rubbing your temple.
the girl who was skating next, the current world champion, had chosen classical music as well - was that a theme this season?
her first just was a triple axel. you almost laughed when she landed it perfectly, the imagine of silver or bronze slowly fading in your mind.
unexpectedly, she fell. her quad flip wasn’t so reliable anymore, apparently.
you didn’t like seeing other people fall - not by any far stretch - but in a sport this competitive, you had to separate the person from the athlete. sure, she was a lovely girl with an amazing career ahead of her, but she was also someone stopping you from winning.
the music stopped, and before you processed that she was off the ice, her score was announced;
“one hundred and thirty point nine three.”
your eyes went wide. “i cannot do that triple, brian.”
he turned to you, nodding. “if everything is going well by the last jump, try it. your technical and presentation will put you in bronze.”
“i really need to get this axel, man,” you sighed. “next season, it’ll be the only thing stopping me if i don’t get it soon.”
brian hummed in response, but it was drowned out by the start of the music - not so classical this time.
you could feel your heart pounding in your chest, hands clammy and shaky. taking a few deep breaths, you looked to the audience - steven met your eyes. you knew it was him.
there was no point mouthing anything, he couldn’t lipread for shit. neither could you - in all fairness. he seemed to notice your anxiety, sending you one of his famous smiles and making a heart with his hands, before blowing you a kiss.
it was such a simple gesture, but somehow it made you feel mountains better. no matter what happened, you already had your prize. you already had your boys, who would be with you forever.
“one hundred and fifty nine point five seven.” the call broke your trance.
there was only one person left to skate before you. the calmness that had washed over you was quickly disappearing, the tide of serenity pulling further and further away.
judging by the upward trajectory these scores were on, even with falls, your hopes of a medal almost melted. all of these girls had jumped - and landed - their triple axel, fuck, the girl in from of you was even trying for a quad next season.
classical music must have been a theme this season, because swan lake filling the rink, the slow melody lacing with your thoughts and clouding your brain.
you had four minutes.
“i’ll be back in a second, going for a smoke,” you mumbled to brain.
thank god the fire exit was only a few steps away, you couldn’t waste the precious seconds until you had to skate.
pulling the pack of cigarettes out of your back pocket and picking one out, you lit it and look a long, needed drag.
smoking was undoubtedly your worst stress reliever. but when a quickie, three hours of reality tv or chinese takeaway was not an option, the quick rush of nicotine just had to do.
it helped with the shaking hands, in all fairness. and the breathing, and the clammy palms. it wasn’t something you did too often, only smoking once in the morning and a few times throughout the day.
what? marc and steven were persuading you to quit. you used to smoke a lot more, back in the early days of your relationship.
flicking the end, you watched the ash fall from the cigarette and onto the pavement below. this was what you needed - a three minute break from people watching, people cheering. nerves and huge crowds did not mix well.
speaking of huge crowds, the applause from inside the building was loud enough to have you crouching down and putting out the cigarette, almost running back inside and up to brian.
“well?”
“no falls,” he sighed. “but she under-rotated her quad toe.”
you nodded, taking your jacket off once more and handing it to brian. the nicotine may have pushed your nerves down, but they were pushing back.
the girl stepped off the ice and along to the kiss and cry, waiting for her scores. you walked to the opening, pulling your guards off and stepping on the ice - it was rough, bumpy from all the skaters before you.
skating laps around the rink, trying to get your bearings, you didn’t try to do anything crazy. a lazy waltz jump and a few turns forward to backward, you were awaiting the girls scores as much as she was.
“one hundred and fifty nine point three four.” she was in second. that under-rotation must have been bad.
making your way to brian, he took both of your hands in his. “do the axel if you can. tight core, stay level, check yourself.”
you nodded.
“let’s go,” he beamed.
double high-fiving him (it was something you had done for years), you skated back from the barrier.
“representing [country], y/n l/n!” the same announcer called.
you waved to the crowds, turning in every direction before moving to the centre, facing the judges.
just your luck, marc (his smile had changed, you noticed) was sat on the same side as the judges. he moved his hand up and down his chest, taking a deep breath, signalling for you to do the same.
and you did, you took a deep breath, hit your thighs to wake up the muscle, got into position and waiting for the music to start.
one, two, three, four, five, six, go.
“this is y/n l/n skating, she’s last to skate after an amazing short programme.” the commentator said into the microphone.
“yep, her short was amazing to watch, but i hear she hasn’t got her triple axel yet, you know?” the other commentator said.
no one in the rink could hear them, only people watching on tv.
“really?”
“unfortunately, yes. after the olympics she tweeted how work had just started on trying to stabilise it.”
they watched your movements for a few seconds.
“and here comes the first element, a lovely layback to beilman spin. would you look at that - perfect! she’s not travelling to much, either, which is good.”
“look at that smile,” the commentator laughed. “the stage presence! truly a rare thing to see in skating these days.”
“agreed, john, agreed. here’s that step sequence, that’s a level five, i think?”
“yeah, level five is about right, marie.”
your heart was beating out of you chest, everything about your body was hot, shaky, terrified. not of the competition, but of the jumps. you couldn’t afford to pop, fall, under-rotate, over-rotate. nothing. they had to be perfect.
“here comes her first jump,” john checked the paper in front of him. “quad toe, triple salchow.”
cross, cross, check, jump, land.
“she’s done it! quad toeloop executed brilliantly, you’ll see the GOE go up for that one, i’d think.”
you smiled, barely having landed before preparing for the next jump. you didn’t need the crossovers here, you were already in perfect position.
check, jump, land.
“and the triple salchow, looking wonderful as ever. that’s a green GOE, as well, probably.”
you weren’t so nervous now, the flow of the programme finally settling in. now it was time to have fun.
presentation was something you relied on heavily, sure you could jump and spin but what good would it be without entertainment? something to keep the audience watching, not just looking? and it did you favours in points, too.
lifting your leg high off the ground for your first spiral, you skated straight past the judges, hoping to god you were on the right edge.
“here comes the next spin, it’s a Y-frame, i think.”
the spectators turned into little blobs of colour, brian’s praise from behind the barrier fading into nothing but white noise. seven rotations, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen- check out.
“still no travel on her spins, john. she’s really pulling through on this programme.” marie said, looking at her colleague.
“sure, but will she try the axel? that’s the real question here.”
it was something you were asking yourself, in all fairness. it didn’t matter now, though, you had another jump coming up.
cross, cross, check, jump, land.
“fabulous quad loop there! if you go back and watch her last season, even the triple loop was looking shaky, this is a huge improvement!”
cheers surrounding you, but they were almost drowned out by the music. you could see brian jumping up and down in your peripheral - he was always so enthusiastic about his students, especially on their harder jumps.
“a choreo sequence coming up, i think.” john said.
you moved to the music, routine so ingrained in your memory that you would probably still be able to do it in twenty years. never taking the smile off your face, you turned to the judges, walking towards them like you were on a catwalk, before suddenly turning backward, getting ready for the next jump.
“quad salchow, double axel, triple loop. difficult combination here, this will go well for y/n if she lands it.”
cross, cross, check, jump, land.
one jump done - but as soon as you were out of the air you were back in it, reminding yourself to keep the double axel a double and not over-rotate.
two jumps down.
for the last one, instead of pulling your arms into your chest, you raised them above your head - a rippon. one of the easiest ways to get more points, if you were confident enough.
“yes, yes, yes!” brain screamed as you skated past.
there can’t have been more than ninety seconds left.
“her last spin coming, it’s a flying camel into a sit spin.” marie read.
this was one of the easiest spins for you - you probably could have done it sleeping. the fear of what came next would have kept you awake, though.
one more step sequence, then the triple axel.
fuck, you thought. i’ll do it. surely the technical would be high enough for bronze by now.
“now, here’s the axel. this will be her first official triple axel attempt, which is good considering how quickly she’s gotten her quads. but let’s just see if she actually tries it.”
the music seemed to fade out, all you could hear was your heartbeat and the scraping of your blades against the ice.
cross, cross, check, jump, land.
you pulled one foot behind the other. cross. and again. cross. raising your foot to your ankle, you twisted your arms round and leaned into your edge. check.
“she’s doing it!”
letting speed build, you swapped onto the other foot, propelling yourself forward. jump….
land.
your blade hit the ice so hard you thought it might have shattered. the crows around you erupted, but no louder than brian, who yelled and jumped like a child on christmas.
“and she’s done it! y/n l/n has her triple axel!”
you couldn’t help but have a small celebration straight after, punching the air, the for-show smile becoming genuine.
the last few seconds of your routine went by in a haze, until you found yourself back in the centre and facing the judges, pulling your body into the finishing pose.
chest heaving, you could hear ringing in your ears as the music stopped, leaving nothing but the cheering crowd as background noise. your eyes fell on marc, who was out of his seat, clapping so hard you half expected his hands to fall of.
“that’s my girl!” he yelled, ignoring the stinging in his palms.
teddy bears and flowers were thrown onto the ice - something that was a custom for fan favourites to receive. after every skate, you always made sure that you collected every teddy, every bouquet, every letter. you owed it all to those people, so why not take their gifts?
a small bear fell right next to you, and you bent down to pick it up, noticing instantly that the bear was dressed in a tiny version of your own dress, stitching on the foot reading “y/n l/n, olympian!”. you couldn’t stop the tears from welling in your eyes.
turning again to the other direction, you waved and bowed, before grabbing the nearest bouquet and skating to the side of the ice.
brian waiting with open arms, face red with excitement. he embraced you as soon as you were close enough, lifting you off of your feet and bouncing you.
“you did it! you did it!” he yelled over the crowd.
“i did,” you beamed. “i did!”
a tv camera was pointed in your face, which would normally irritate you, but you were on top of the world. seeing a sharpie on the barrier, you placed the bouquet down and picked the pen up, walking to the lens and drawing a love heart.
“i love you!” you yelled into the camera, blowing kisses.
brian led you to the kiss and cry as you pulled your guards on, one hand still holding the mini-you bear.
a medal didn’t matter to you in that moment. you had done everything you needed to do - landed every jump. even the one you were certain you weren’t going to land.
the wait between sitting down and getting your scores felt like an eternity.
“were you sure you’d do it?” brian asked.
“no!” you laughed. “look at this,”
you showed him the bear, to which he awed and pointed out that it even had the same coloured eyes as yours.
“the scores, please.” the announcement caught your attention.
“y/n l/n has earned in the long programme, a total of one hundred and seventy two point nine nine points. she is in first place.”
the world went quiet. for a moment. first place? that meant… that meant…
“gold!” you screamed, jumping out of your seat, and embracing brian again.
“gold!” he screamed back, pulling away and holding your shoulders, pure joy on his face.
you turned to the camera, face in pure shock (little did you know this would be a meme for the next six months), words not quite coming to you, but tears forming in your eyes.
there’s was another announcement, something about medal ceremony, but you didn’t hear - you were focused on something new.
“i need to find marc,” you beamed to brian.
you almost ran out of the kiss and cry, people congratulating you the whole way along the side of the rink, until your eyes fell on marc, who was ten or so meters away.
“marc!” you yelled, getting his attention.
you ran to him, not caring about the cameras following you. finally reaching him, you jumped - literally - into his arms, feeling him spin you around, his grip tight around your waist (something else that would trend on fan twitter, causing you to google what an “otp” and “bi panic couple” meant).
“you did it, baby, you did it!” he praised into your ear, setting you down.
choosing to kiss him instead of a response, you felt the heat of his lips transfer to yours, warm and homely.
“i’m so proud of you,” steven said after you pulled apart. “sorry, just had to tell you that myself, right now.”
“don’t apologise,” you pulled him in for another kiss.
“i’m proud of you, too,” marc pulled you into a tight hug. “so, so, so proud, sweetheart.”
tears fell - happy tears - as you looked at him, his hands on either side of your face. this was everything you ever wanted.
this was everything you ever wanted.
#moonknight#moon knight#moonknight x reader#moonknight fanfiction#moonknight imagine#moonknight imagines#marc spector#marc spector x reader#marc spector fanfiction#marc spector imagines#marc spector imagine#steven grant#steven grant fanfiction#steven grant imagines#steven grant imagine#steven grant x reader#marvel#marvel imagine#marvel imagines#marvel fanfiction#marvel x reader
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JJK FF/ ROYAL GUARD
CHAPTER NINE | SERIES
Ch. 1
Ch. 2
Ch. 3
Ch. 4
Ch. 5
Ch. 6
Ch. 7
Ch. 8
Ch. 9
Ch. 10
When you keep bumping into your personal royal guard by accident not knowing he is your guardian angel
Pairing: Jeon Jungkook!fallen angel!royal guard! × fem!reader!virgin!princess
Word count: 2.9k
Rating: 18+ smut
Genre + warnings: Fluff, smut, dirty talk, princess loses her virginity, first!time, a lot of pussy licking and fingering, biting, nipple play, Jungkook groans a lot, full nakedness, big dick!jk, a little bit of rough pinning and French, neck kissing, hard orgasms, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it, guys :D) - she probably pregnant by the time he is done with her - upss - paranormal romance, historical fanfiction, Kook being cold and mysterious, being his sexy self. Caring and possessive!jk! Really horny towards his princess, being a big seductive tease. A lot of swearing, cursing and a little bit of crying. The story isn’t real, just my imagination running wild so just enjoy reading!
a/n: Sorry for being absent so long. That’s all I can say. I hope you can all forgive me?
It was early in the morning when you awoke feeling that something is off. Expecting your guard to be in the same bed you both fell asleep in, he was nowhere in sight. The coldness of the room and lack of any warm body next to yours gave you a strange sense of déjà vu.
You sit up slowly, trying your best to make out every detail of the room around you. It was a beautiful bedroom, with dark purple carpet floors, high glass ceilings and white walls. You could see yourself spending hours in here getting lost in thought. But not now. Not today. Not with all the chaos going on right this moment.
As you thought this, suddenly door opens and then you see him. Only wearing sweatpants, his naked torso glistened by drops of sweat and his beautiful wings fluttering behind him.
A small gasp left your mouth at how absolutely gorgeous he looks and how quickly you were forgetting all about your concerns. How can someone be so perfect?
When he sees that you’re up, he gives you a warm smile,” Is my princess awake?” he asks, still looking like a walking sex god, but much calmer than earlier this morning.
As if nothing has happened between you two.
"Yeah," you croak out, still in complete awe of seeing him in such a state. "I'm fine now."
Smirking slightly, he comes into the room further, holding something in his hands. It was a sword. Not like you're gonna judge him, you've always seen him with weapons when he wears an armor, but nonetheless he looks scary carrying a blade around, especially after what had occurred between you. He puts it down beside the footboard of the bed as he goes towards you, standing only a few steps away from where you are currently sitting.
Jungkook reaches out and gently strokes his hand through your hair before pulling your head towards his chest. In response you wrap your arms around his waist, letting out a content sigh. It wasn't long until you could feel him softly kissing your forehead. Your breathing hitches in excitement when you finally feel him fully pressing against you. For a second you forget everything that's been going on.
But then reality hits you again and you pull back,” What are you doing?” you ask, trying to sound stern but failing miserably.
He chuckles lightly,” I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. I was sparring in my training grounds so I get up pretty early. It’s six in the morning, sweetheart.”
As you try to get up, the sudden pain in your lower region makes you wince.
“Are you sore? I was pretty rough with you last night. Come here,” Jungkook says.
And without even thinking twice, you let your legs go limp so that they rest on either side of his hips. His strong hands carefully grab hold of you, supporting you while you lean back and allow him to place his large hands under your bottom. Before you realize what he's doing he sits himself in the bed,bringing you with him. He places you on his lap and immediately you feel his muscular thighs envelop you completely. Your cheeks flush red as soon as he notices how you look.
The thought of being held so tenderly by the man who was your first kiss and who was supposed to be your husband brings a smile to your face. He runs his fingers through your hair, playing with your locks which caused a shiver to run down your spine.
Then, just before he leans his head down and kisses you softly, he whispers into your ear,” Good morning, my queen.” The way he speaks and how intimate it sounds sends chills down your spine. He knows exactly how you react to these kinds of things. You don’t mind it because it’s the type of teasing you enjoy. And he loves making you blush.
You hum happily when he plants another soft kiss onto your neck where your collar met his mark of ownership over you and it causes him to grin mischievously. Your eyes widen when you notice that his fingers have stopped playing with your hair and he starts to caress your bare skin, causing goosebumps to arise everywhere his fingertips brush past them.
You close your eyes and inhale deeply as he continues moving down towards your breasts, stopping when you feel him graze over them. A small moan escapes your lips at the unexpected contact, causing Jungkook to let out a low chuckle.
“So sensitive, ” he mutters quietly, earning you another small nod from you.
He moves his hands down to your stomach, tracing circles on your skin. You bite your lip to stop yourself from moaning again. Every touch from him was scorching.
“Do you want me to continue?” he asks, his voice sounding husky.
You open your eyes and look at him,” Yes please.” Even though it hurts.
Jungkook chuckles once more before starting to trail his touch up your inner thighs. After running his knuckles along your wet curls you whimper at the slight touch. This seems to amuse him and he stops for a second and looks at you through hooded eyes,” Are you sure you wouldn’t preferred a warm bath instead so you feel a little better? I did a number on you, kitten,” his husky voice almost sounds apologetic. Almost.
Before you can even process what he said, he presses a finger to your lower lip, asking you to keep quiet. Then, with swift movements, he lifts you up so he can get off of the bed and before you can whimper in protest, thinking he will leave you in this state, he removes his own clothes leaving him only in a black boxers, and he kneels down besides the bed.
Before you can ask him what he is doing, he pulls you to the edge and spreads your legs so your core was openly exposed within his eye level. Your shocked mind can’t even prepare you when you glance down and see traces of blood on your lower lips and the sheets below.
“Oh God!” you exclaim, trying hard not to show fear or embarrassment.
You don’t think he notices however because he continues placing kisses on your stomach and thigh. When he comes to the spot above your navel he smirks devilishly as if he found some treasure there,” So beautiful, ” he mumbles to himself before placing a soft, tender kiss.
You close your eyes and sigh contently, unable to take it anymore, but before you know what is happening, his lips are already firmly connected with your skin and the pain is gone for a second.
“No, please stop,” you whisper breathlessly, not able to stand it anymore.
“I feel dirty.”
Jungkook doesn’t seem to hear you and continues trailing soft kisses on your inner thigh, eliciting a loud moan from your mouth.
“Don’t worry baby, I won’t hurt you…” he says in a seductive tone. Your whole body begins shaking with the need for his mouth to be somewhere else; anywhere else but where his mouth is currently located.
Looking at your wet folds, you feel embarrassed from being so open like this but Jungkook doesn’t care. It looked like his only goal was to satisfy you.
He takes his sweet time and when he finally gets to the right part of your center, his thumb caresses your clit gently while sucking it with his teeth.
Your heart starts racing and you gasp for air, trying desperately not to cry out and make a fool of yourself. The way he licks and sucks your pussy so delicately makes you feel so good; you just want to cum. You know it might not happen anytime soon. You don’t want to disappoint him, but you feel so needy, so desperate.
“Baby,” Jungkook whispers against your clit. Before you can register what is about to happen he thrusts two fingers deep inside your pussy in one fluid movement.
He is so fucking fast! He does not give you the chance to adjust to his movements and before long you are panting and crying out in pleasure.
The feeling of his fingers stroking your sensitive cunt is too much to handle. It feels so good and the vibrations he makes while moving are making you crazy so you start to arch your back to bring him into deeper penetration but Jungkook stops you immediately,” Don’t move kitten, you need to relax. Relax and let me pleasure you. It would be so ungrateful not to reward you after all I have done to you.”
You don’t know how to argue with that, so you simply nod in agreement and allow his fingers to explore you while he massages you with those skilled fingers he used earlier.
“God, you feel so good. Like you are ready to explode,” he praises as he inserts another digit slowly.
It’s like a shock goes through your body and you moan loudly. The way he talks to you is so sexual. You feel like an object, a prize, something to be conquered.
“That’s good baby, I want you to scream,” you can feel the way he smiles between your thighs as he speaks. His hot breath makes you shiver, and suddenly your breathing becomes rapid.
His thumb strokes your clit again, and you let out a whimper.
You feel his fingers enter you fully, stretching you, and fuck, you love the sensation.
“Yes! Yes please!” you beg, grabbing onto the sheets beneath you tightly, waiting for that sweet release. Jungkook smirks at your response. You never thought you could sound like that.
“Please what?” He grins.
“Please touch me! Make me come! Take me with your cock-“
“Say less,” he snarls before he stands up. Pushing his underwear down, he lifts you up , straddling his hips, and enters you quickly. You squeal at the intrusion but try not to moan as he fills you completely.
For a moment you can do nothing more than hold on tight to his shoulders and ride out the wave of pleasure that engulfs you.
You feel dizzy and weak yet you can’t help but smile at the man who fucked you mercilessly earlier. That’s how much you trust him, how much you admire him.
After his hands roam your breasts and he gives them a light squeeze, you wrap your arms around his neck and kiss him. With every thrust you get closer to oblivion. You feel like you are going to burst, you want to scream, but you don’t want him to stop. If anything you feel a lot of pressure building up in your core and your pussy starts to contract around him. Jungkook moves faster, hitting the spot over and over until you feel tears streaming down your cheeks.
Just as you think you are going to collapse in his arms, you can feel your orgasm coming, the waves rocking you violently until it reaches its peak. You gasp for air, and feel him swallow you whole before letting himself go, releasing inside your body, his dick twitching inside you.
As he calms himself down, he holds you close to him, resting his chin on top of your head. He stays silent for a couple of seconds, then he speaks.
“I guess I should have started earlier. How do you feel now?”
You can’t help but laugh at his question.
“Amazing! My legs are trembling. My hair is sticking to my sweaty forehead and everything, and I’m really hungry.”
He chuckles quietly, still holding you, and you know what he is thinking without needing to look at him, “We both are. Let’s get into that bath, princess. I’m sure I made you more tired this morning.”
You blush at his words but nod in agreement. Picking you up bridal style, he walks to the bathroom with confident strides. As you pass the big mirror, you almost gasp when you see his naked ass and his muscular back with tattoos but you couldn’t mistake the red marks on his skin which were left by your fingernails when he made love to you last night.
Did I really do that? You were shocked.
He carries you to the tub and puts you down carefully so you wouldn’t slip from his grasp, although it looks like he doesn't care about that either. He has been touching you more these past days, not caring if you get sick of it, especially since you are getting more used to his touch by the day.
Filling the bath with warm water, he adds some fragrances which smell like fresh fruits and grass. Even though it was sweet of him, you couldn’t get your eyes off him.
He was so gorgeous that you couldn’t even believe that he wants the plain you.
Still naked from your previous activities, you watched his big cock twitch at the sight of your eyes glued on him. He seems very comfortable with it. His cock is hard and bulging, the veins on his penis standing out, but you didn’t notice. You were just staring at his member.
When he noticed you watching his cock he gave you a sly smile and you blushed a little bit. You turn your eyes towards the floor, not wanting him to see how flustered you were; you’re sure you wouldn’t like it.
Once the tub was filled and filled with bubbles, he climbs in first and pulls you closer to him, putting his arms around your waist securely. You can feel your heart beating rapidly once again when he wraps his arms around you.
This feeling of safety and security overwhelms you; you have no idea why, but it somehow does. You find yourself leaning back slightly against his chest and closing your eyes; the smell of the bathwater and his scent is making you drowsy, the sensation almost lulling you to sleep. When the warmth enveloped your body, Jungkook moved his hand under your butt, pulling you a bit closer to his chest and wrapping his arm around your waist.
With Jungkook's warmth surrounding you, you finally felt safe enough to sleep.
The smell of coffee wakes you up when you hear a low voice calling your name.
When you open you eyes, you see Jungkook sitting at the edge of the bed where you were sleeping and he was dressed in his full armor. Even his face was covered by a scarf.
You stared at him confused,” What’s going on? Why are you dressed like a guard again?”
“I was out checking your land with my men while you were sleeping. Since you were tired, I wanted you to rest.” He explains.
When you hear his words, you immediately sat up,” Is my father safe? Did the vampires were still at the palace?”
Before he could answer you there was a knock at the door, indicating that someone is outside.
“Enter,” he commands.
The door opens, revealing a servant. It was golden haired fallen angel, the same as Jungkook but instead of black wings he had silver wings. Looking down at his feet, he didn’t even looked at you both to avoid his king’s disapproving stare because he just disturbed your moment.
“Your highness, I am sorry to interrupt but a group of vampires are approaching. We must prepare for battle.”
Hearing the word vampires, makes you freeze when you look at Jungkook in fear.
“They are here? In your kingdom?” you ask as you grab onto his armored chest.
Jungkook pushes his scarf from his face and grabs your hand with one of his hand and holds it to his lips as he kisses it softly.
“Don’t worry, I will protect you,” he promises.
“Protect me? I think we already established that, but who will protect you?” you sounded worried.
He laughs,” Darling, I don’t need protecting but I appreciate the thought. You’re the only person that can make me feel this safe,” he says tenderly.
At those words, you couldn’t control your emotions anymore; you threw your arms around him and hugged him tightly; trying to ignore the fact that he was still wearing his armor. He chuckled in your ear, rubbing your arms gently.
“I’ll be fine,” he whispers, kissing your temple.
“Promise me you won’t die,” you whisper back.
“I promise,” he replies.
“Okay,” you say, reluctantly letting go of him.
“Now go eat something in the kitchen. My servants will prepare everything you ask so just relax and wait for me to return,” he says and kisses the tip of your nose lightly.
“I don’t want to let you out of my sight,” you admit.
Jungkook grins,” You never have to. But right now I am your guard. So go shower and go eat breakfast in the dining hall. I will be back before you know it. If something happens to you, I will know it.”
“How?” you asked rising an eyebrow at him.
Jungkook grins and pulls you closer.
Touching the collar on your neck, you felt it then. It hummed warmly with energy, the small vibrations making your whole body tingle.
“My collar keeps me updated on all of your movements, even emotions you feel and tells me everything you do. So don’t worry, darling. Just try to keep your mind occupied or else you might start worrying about me. Now go eat, I’ll be back soon.”
Kissing you the last time, he leaves the room and you are left alone.
Be continued…
p.s. All images and gifs are not mine, some of the edits are mine edited but not every picture. All the credit goes to their rightful owners
DO NOT REPOST THIS WORK AS YOUR OWN BECAUSE THIS IS THE ORIGINAL OWNER’S STORY
If you like, please reblog or like the post so I can post the next chapters :)
🅒 All rights reserved
#jungkook fanfic#jeon jeongkook#bts smut#bts fluff#kpop fiction#royal guard#virgin princess#fallen angel#princess royal#historical romantic fiction#bts
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Set Fire to The Rain
Tywin Lannister x Reader
Tears of gold Au
A/N: had to use the gif!!!! Instead of the red I’d like to imagine different types of robes, both medieval and the ones in the gif. Basically anything that said women would have gotten married in. Ps. Let’s just pretend the reader doesn’t know about Jamie throwing Bran out a window.
tw: mentions of self immolation, blood, stab wounds. More blood!
The air of the morning often brought Tywin solace, the silence, the birds. His wife on the other hand, hated it. The groans and grumbles every time the servants or he would try and wake her up. This morning held an eerie silence in the Red Keep. Both him and his wife were wide awake before their maids came for them, none of them spoke a word but held on tight to one another as their little feline purred next to his wife.
That soon came to an end, as in an hour you’d found yourselves being dressed for the day. The maester had visited, which seemed like a twisted joke, the health of the babies wouldn’t really matter if the war was lost. Nonetheless, you sat down as Pycelle examined you, your husband leaning against the room door with a stoic look on his face. There was much to be done today, the two of you ate what best you could before parting ways.
Your ladies had found you, helping you walk to the rear grounds of the Red Keep, where the men of the staff had huddled stacks of wood and sticks together. Back home, there was a ground for this, steps lowering toward the pyre as women ran into the fire. They weren’t sure how to do this and neither were you. When Fredrick returned with the headcount of how many women wanted to join, it was twice the amount of your ladies. Forty three people, women and children had decided to do this. You nodded before instructing the men of how to build the pyre. Almost dome shaped pyre, easy if women to run into, it stood tall almost twelve feet high, as the ropes bound each section together. The dread in your stomach grew. The rest of the ladies at court decided to take shelter in Maegor’s Holdfast, with the Queen Regent, Margery and Sansa.
Though the king had requested an audience of his family for lunch in his receiving chamber, a climb quiet worse than climbing the Tower of the Hand. You had to climb it nonetheless, Fredrick held onto your hand as you went up the stairs. Pausing every few moments before making the journey again. Your husband up top, grew frustrated with his grandson, all to worried about you climbing all those stairs. As he got up, to find you himself. Joffrey stopped him immediately.
“Grandfather, Lady Y/N isn’t a child. She can make it here on her own.” Joffrey sounded like he was actually concerned about the matter “Oh wait, she is a child.” He sniggered. Tywin merely shut his eyes to compose himself. “I heard of the pyre, your wife is building. Grandfather.” He said and scoffed. “I do not see how it is honourable to die like cowards rather than fighting the bloody fight.”
“It is called martyrdom, Your Grace.” Your voice called out from the entrance of the room, out of breath as you bowed. Fredrick turning to close the door behind you. “Not all of us are as brave as you, Your Grace.” You said while approaching your husband. “Fighting in the Vanguard, isn’t for the weakest.” Tywin shuffled in his seat, watching you test his grandson with a small smirk. You were growing claws. “Forgive me my king, it is the vanguard you are fighting in? Is it not?” You quirked a brow at him, slightly pleased at the annoyed look on his face as you were getting to him. Sansa nearly bursting into a giggle as Cersei tries to cool her son down.
Here sat the Lannisters, well the Lannister-Baratheon family, though you weren’t sure how plausible that was. As usual, Tywin and Joffrey sat at the heads of the table, you next to your husband and Cersei opposite you. Next to you sat Jamie, right opposite him sat Tommen next to Myrcella. Margery sat next to her intended, on the other side of Joffrey sat Sansa, next to her was Tyrion, squished between her and his niece. Opposite him sat Ser Loras. Quite a full table as a hoard of maid, set food down in front of you, apparently the king himself dealt with menu. You were praying that it wasn’t poisoned.
“A toast.” Cersei spoke up as she looked to her son, who still looked quite annoyed at your antics before
All the cups were soon being filled with wine, and each cup being lifted in preparation for the toast. The maids quite obviously skipped over yours, Tommen’s and Mrycella’s cups. To which the king tutted. “Come now grandmother. You must drink.” The king gestured at your empty cup and snapped at the maids to fill it, hesitantly as they looked to your husband who held an unamused look to his face.
“I cannot dri-“ before you could finish your sentence he cut you off.
“Nonsense! Drink my lady, your king commands it.” To which you look straight at him, looking annoyed and nod no.
Tyrion comes to your defence, “I’d speak softer nephew, in a few hours you might not be king.”
To which Joffrey grows visibly angrier, huffing out breaths of fury and looking red “I am King!”
“Any man who must say ‘I am king’ is no true king.” You husband finally spoke up, sporting a subtle glare at the boy king “I’ll be sure to remind you that, once I’ve won your war for you.”
Joffrey looked offended as he walked around the table to walk forward. “My father won the real war, he killed Rhaegar, he took the Iron Throne. While you hid under Castley Rock!” He yelled out.
The entire table looked at him in shock, the two little kids had no idea of what their brother had just done. Both Margery and Loras seemed to be enjoying this, while you and Jamie just looked at each other with wide eyes, Cersei nodded her head in defeat, knowing her son was beyond her control and Sansa looked confused as to why everyone looked so scared.
“The king is tired. See him to his chambers.” Tywin’s voice sounded dark as he commanded her daughter, Cersei began to drag her son out the room, with her followed Margery and her brother who quickly bowed before leaving.
Sansa opened her mouth to close it again, she was confused as to how Tywin managed to do that and you just nodded your head at her. With yet another lunch in ruins, Sansa took her leave too. Leaving behind Tywin, Jamie, Tyrion, Tommen, Myrcella and you. Atleast there was food, that was until you realized they made mutton. A common hatred for mutton existed between you and you husband and he called to have something else prepared.
“I’m sorry about Joff, he’s a little stupid.” Myrcella whispers like it’s a secret
“Huh! Traitor!” You joked back making Tywin laugh. Both Jamie and Tyrion taken aback by Tywin’s loud “Ha”
By the end of the lunch, Tywin was whisked away, with Tyrion escorting the kids to Maegors Holdfast. Leaving you behind with Jamie. You quite enjoyed, both your stepsons company. Stannis’s army was merely two hours away, early but inevitably they were coming. You held Jamie’s arm as he escorted you back to your chambers. “Shouldn’t you be with the king?” You asked him.
“Father wanted me to stay with you.” You frowned at Jamie, he was a Kingsgaurd. People would talk. Jamie knew what you were thinking and simply began reciting the words your husband told you the night of your wedding “A lion doesn’t concern itself with the opinions of sheep.” The both you recited halfway through.
Your ladies awaited you in your chambers varenda, all dressed in the robes they were wed in. This was an eerie parallel to the night of your wedding, these very ladies had dressed you to the nine’s for your husband. This time they would dress you to your shrine. Your wedding gown wouldn’t fit because of your large bump and you did not want to have it altered. Instead you opted to wear a deep crimson gown, that had gold lions embroidered down its bodice. Intricate, yet simply. The jewelry you put on, were also the ones from your wedding, and over top all of that. Your cloak, symbolic yet necessary; the very cloak your husband wrapped around you by the seven, swearing to protect you. You were now wearing to await your death.
When you emerged from you room, Jamie took a breath of shock. He always admired you, for tolerating his father and his sister. Sure he might have been displeased with the replacement of his mother but he knew, he was partially at fault for this. He gave you a sympathetic smile, walking you to the rear grounds of the Red Keep, were an unlit pyre awaited the many ladies of court. Chairs had been put out for the people present, so that they might relax as they waited. Wine and food were present at tables, like a horrifying feast. Every single person there grew quiet as they saw you walking in, Lady Lannister. Dressed, probably one last time, to prove that she is just as much a lady of her house as she was titled.
While most you gathered around the pyre, you awaited your husband and the king to address their departure. You pinched at your palm in anxiety as Fredrick and Jamie stood next to you, your eyes fixated on the lit torch next to the pyre. Soon they all heard clanking of metal, groups of men walking in all armoured, in front of them walked your husband. You’d picked up the torch, staring at it, as though praying for all this to be a dream.
Tywin was taken aback by what he saw, for the second time he saw his wife, dressed to the nines, in the colours of his house. Her back covered in their martial cloak, she turned to look at him. Her eyes glowing from the fire in her hands, her hair down, a gleam of sorrow in her eyes, her belly swollen with his children. The most hauntingly beautiful scene laid out in front of him as he approached her, the wind added to the dramatics of it all, her hair blew in the gusts of winds as he came to stand in front of her. All the ladies of the court whispering and staring at them, he towered over her easily, his armour making him appear much large then her. His hand slowly snaked forward to her belly as he closed the gap between the two. Pressing his lips to her as a gasp of unison left from its spectators.
“Come back to me.” You wanted to make him promise but you know he wouldn’t make any promises that he was absolutely sure of.
“Wait till the very end.” He replies back, you nod at him as your eyes tear up, Trying to hold it all in but undoubtedly one tear slips past you, that Tywin wipes away with his thumb, pressing a chaste kiss to your head before turning to his son. He held his son’s face with one hand. “Protect her. Be the man this house needs.” He says to him before nodding at Fred. Giving you one last look as you reach down to light the great pyre. Flames ignited in one corner as you stepped back, your husband behind you as you watched the flames of you fate grow.
The deep below of the horns filled the capital, it was time. Guards had all began to run out to their post, “I will be at the front gates, I will come find you the minute it’s over.” He reassured you before he turned to leave. A dread set across all the women in the grounds, after nearly two decades of peace, war had finally come knocking down the door. You tried to take deep breaths, stress was your biggest weakness, that directly affected your children. But how does a wife not stress when her husband will most likely die tonight?
Night had began to set in, the glow of the fire keeping everyone warm from the chilled winds in King’s Landing. Another universal joke, had this not been a precaution to the war outside, this would have been a rather nice event to hold for the court. Most children were now asleep on their mother’s laps, seems like your children too were asleep within you, they stopped moving around a while ago. Jamie was sat next to you, while he intended on standing, you ordered him to sit. Telling him there would be enough a fight for him when Stannis’s army came for the Red Keep.
“I hope I see my mother, after the fire.” You’d blurted out in deep thought
“I do too.” Jamie nodded back, before looking slightly guilty for bringing Joanna up.
“You make him happy, my lady.” Jamie continued, smiling at the fire. “My mother would be content knowing so.”
You smiled at that. You never tried to compete with Joanna Lannister, you didn’t know much about her and you didn’t care. Most part of you thought you’d barely see your husband, other than to spread your legs open for him. Tywin Lannister was a lot more giving for his family than people realise.
“Have you named them yet?” He asked looking at your belly.
“I have, I think it’s a girl and a boy. So Tyeon and Sneya.” You said while rubbing your tummy. “Though if they are both boys, you might have your hands full, in a few years. My sons could use the best swordsman teaching them.” You bugged his shoulder as he looked at you bashfully.
The battle on the front end raged on, the attempts at sabotaging the enemy fleet nearly backfired, as wildfire coated most of the shore line. Both the Lannister and Tyrell army were more than enough, to hold Stannis back however there would be a lot of bloodshed. Tywin and Ser Loras charged through with their men, as Stannis’s army approached the gate, easily cutting through most of the men, before more of the crown army poured out into the shore. Most of the men were pulled off of their horses, your husband included; but he had years of battle experience on him for mere foot soldiers to deal with. However with the gates now wide open, things could go anyway. A soldier spectating it all, ran all the way back to the Red Keep.
“My lady!” He huffed out of breath as he reached the rear grounds. “The gate has fallen.”
You entire body froze, while the women all erupted in panicked chatter, most of them on the verge of crying. You asked the soldier to approach. “What of Lord Tywin?” You cocked your brow at him, trying your best to not let your emotions engulf you.
“I watched him fall from his horse, my lady.” He bowed his head in sympathy as you turned to look at Jamie. He too sported a sorrowed look on his face. You straightened yourself up. Tywin’s voice rang through your ears
“You will wait till the very end.”
You took a deep breath and closed your eyes, trying you best to not cry, these people do not need that right now. You turned to face the chaos behind you and spoke up
“Do not be disheartened. Our armies are larger in number. Stannis will not take us today!” Your voice held a tinge of emotion behind them. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw movement. The red fabric of a dress, that one of two women could wear in this castle. You and the queen. Jamie saw the same thing too, confused as to where she was going you looked to him. “Go.” You nodded at him while he looked at you hesitantly “Jamie, go.” You urged him and he listened. Running in the direction his sister went towards.
“Fredrick, go with him.” Your long friend refused but you yelled at him. “Fred, please! I’d rather not lose any Lannisters today.” He nodded at you, handing you the bow and the set of arrows he had with himself. They weren’t for him, they were for you.
“Shoot them, not in the leg Y/N. The chest.” You scowled at him, and his untimely joke. Before he left you pulled him into hug. Fredrick had been your friend since you were a child, and if there was a slight chance that this might be the last time you were seeing him, you were not going to miss that chance.
Most of the ladies had huddled close, since the last news you got. Most of them started to sing hymns or pray in a huddle. You sat in a corner where it was most silent, trying to stop your head from thinking too much and repeating under your breath. “Please let him be okay.” as you patted your belly. There was a high chance your husband was dead, and the more you thought of it. The more your heartbeat raised.
A worried Sansa ran out from Mageor’s Holdfast, nearly losing her footing as she found you. “They are going to kill us!” She huffed while shaking your shoulders. All the blood from your body drained out, were there Stannis’s soldiers in the castle? Was this the end. You looked to the fire as most of the ladies stood up, you had to know for sure. But then you looked at Sansa, this girl had endured so much in the name of Lannisters. You looked at the fire again, you could jump in the pyre. This war was lost anyways or you help Sansa escape. They could just be assassins
“This isn’t over yet, unless we get news. No one dies today.” You looked at all the terrified ladies, they all nodded to one another before sitting down yet again. You picked up your bow and arrow and made Sansa follow behind you. The entire Red Keep was dim, no one there to reignite the dimmed torches. The whispers of the wind blowing outside made it oddly eerie as you walked through the corridors, up to your tower. There was a secret passage there, you had read about it. The both of you tried to walk as light as feathers, tiptoeing in the dark, an arrow at your bow, ready to be drawn. That’s when a loud clang, scared the shit out of you, you turned to the hallway, to the right. An armed man, looking like a deer caught at a hunt. One deep breath and you let your arrow go.
A loud scream came out from the man, as the two of you rushed past him. You went over to inspect him, end his misery. That’s when you noticed he had no armour on and sighed in relief. “These aren’t soldiers. They are thievers.” You told Sansa, as you moved to continue on. Sansa screamed making you whip your head to her, another theif held a knife to her throat, you held out another arrow aimed at the man’s head. What you didn’t notice was another one of them wacking the bow out of your hands, pushing you onto the ground.
You fought against the man as he held you down by your shoulders. “Look, pretty noble ladies. I wonder if their cunts feel better than whores.” He spat while he spoke, you still fought against him. “Aw, this one is pregnant.”
“This one looks innocent.” The other one grinned with his crooked black teeth on display. “Screw the gold cups, I want a piece of this pie.” Sansa thrashed around and so did you as they tried to rip at your clothing. You let your body slightly relax as you felt then man’s head nuzzling between your clothed breasts. You took your opportunity and lifted your head up, a clean bite right onto the man ear. Making him scream bloody murder “The cunt got my ear!” Before he could come at you again, you took an arrow and plunged it right in his belly with your hand, you did it twice more to be sure. The other man pushed Sansa aside and ran to you, trying to nail you back on the ground. But the young wolf grew her claws too and plunged an arrow into his back, before he could hurt you.
Once both men stopped trashing around you stood up, spitting out the remaining blood from your mouth. Sansa ran to you and engulfed you, the young girl stood quite taller than you and you huffed trying to hold her lanky body, she sobbed in relief as tears fell from your eyes too. The reality setting in, but you reassured her nonetheless. “We are going t be fine, I am going to get you home.” A gentle, stabbing pain erupted in your belly. You simply patted at it, your children probably moving around within you.
Sansa picked up the remaining arrows for you and the two of you began walking again, sniffling as you were terrified that you would die today. Whether it was the fire or thievers. You were trying to mentally manipulate yourself into believing you were alright, but the pain your belly grew. You put it off as your children being hyperactive. You were almost there, but a sharp pain in your abdomen made you yelp out. Holding onto the wall next to you, huffing as the pain knocked your breath out of you. Sansa quickly stood next to you.
“Lady Y/N, are you hurt.” She sounded concerned as she looked over you
“No, I’m fine. Just have to get to the top.” You planned on lying down after you got Sansa through the passage. Both of you began climbing, but barely making a few step before another sharp pain hit you. You cried out, holding onto Sansa’s arm. “You two better stop, whatever it is you are doing in there!” You scolded your children as if they could hear you and began to slowly climb the steps again. You stood rested against the cool stone walls of the tower, taking in deep breaths to ease your pain. But it only kept coming back, much worse than before.
“Y/N, you are hurt! Blood!” Sansa looked over your body trying to figure out where you were bleeding from. You too did the same until you figured it out. There was wetness between your legs, it was your children. Before you reacted another sharp pain knocked the wind out of you.
“We. Have to. Get up there.” You huffed out between breaths, as you held onto the walls as you climbed. A few more steps and you were going to be there. You weren’t ready to do this, you weren’t ready to lose your husband and your children in one night. This could not have been happening. Another sharp pain made you sob out, the hard exterior of your courage faltering as you heard metal clanking towards you. Panic settled in your body as you took everything you had within you and stood straight again. Knocking an arrow to your bow, ready to shoot whoever this was.
“Lady Y/N?” A panicked voice huffed closer as they climbed the steps. It was Jamie and you sighed out relief. Dropping the weapon from your hands as he came into vision, Fredrick right behind him. Yet another stabbing pain shot up your spine making you sob out and fall to your knees, only this time it didn’t got away. Making your cry in pain. Both Jamie and Fredrick ran to your side as Sansa stood their looking horrified.
“It- it’s her babies.” Sansa stammered.
Jamie huffed and effortlessly picked you up as you cried in pain, your state getting worse than it was before. “Find the Maester, Septa and nurses. Now!” He ordered Fredrick who threw himself down the stairs as quickly as his feet would take him.
“You are going to be okay, Lady Y/N. You are going to be just fine.” Jamie comforted you as he took you up the stairs to you chambers, while you sobbed in pain. Reminding Jamie of the awful night, when his mother’s screams coated the walls of Castley Rock. He couldn’t help her, but he was going to do everything in his power to help you.
next chapter
#Spotify#tears of gold au#tywin lannister x reader#tywin lannister#house lannister#desiblr#tywin x reader#game of thrones fanfiction#got#got x you#got x reader#reader insert
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Either Seteth x Alois x M!Byleth or Mauvier x Griss x M!Alear
Byleth, Seteth, Griss, and Alear are the feeders. You can choose which one you want to do. Maybe include gainer sex?
Didn't get much engage so did the latter option. Also like, Griss so good
Also, I did say nothing explicit and I kinda was just not gonna do the explicit stuff but like hrghhhh, changed my mind cause I have had many thoughts and also I want to get better with explicit stuff wahh. Also one of few people to not be anon so felt better doing it lol
So, I hope you enjoy this and hopefully the explicit stuff came out at least somewhat decent after not writing anything like it for so long.
Warning: This is a fetish story!
The Holy Land of Lythos is revered throughout all of Elyos. Even the oldest, most staunch Elusians are unable to to help themselves to hold some level of respect for the venerable country of the last remaining Divine Dragon who had been able to save the entirety of the continent.
The title as the Holy One is still a name that Alear is unable to become accustomed to even after so many years of being referred to as such. Even after forgiving the Four Hounds who served one who wished for Elyos’ destruction and welcoming them into his own group, only a few questioning The Holy One’s decision. Even less opposition came about with the decision of Mauvier and Griss to dedicate themselves to him, the two’s service only acceptable after all the destruction wrought by Sombron. Unfortunately, those in agreement over the men’s new posts had been unsatisfied with the later news of Alear’s decision to marry the two men.
Now, Alear wonders if many would still refer to him as the Holy One if they knew about his certain, larger preferences towards those of the same sex. Said preferences are all too noticeable now on Mauvier’s waistline.
The former Four Hounds member is nothing like his former knightly glory. Long gone is his built, statuesque figure hidden beneath bulky armor. His tall frame is now swathed in a heaping bundle of lard that is barely covered up by large, oversized clothes. Mauvier is a complete butterball with his new weight now. His own girth surpasses Alear’s and Griss’ combined with him also weighing more than the two men together; his massive pillowy gut drapes past his rounded, flabby waistline that is always squished and pinched by even the stretchiest and loosest of fabrics. His gut is by far the largest thing about Mauvier, even with the rest of his bloated figure also being encased by extra piles of fat. His thighs are one section of his body to also receive a generous amount of adipose. The two large thighs are wide enough to where the obese knight can no longer walk properly; his low amount of steps are all done by him needing to swing one wide, chair sized thigh in as big an arc he can muster with his enormous gut in the way past another equally sized thigh. His plush knees have even lost definition like the rest of his body, the two joints coated in sagging fat from his thighs. And Mauvier’s elbows are in almost the same condition, his flour bag sized biceps swaddled in so much fat that he has far less mobility in them than he could ever imagine. His arms rest at a permanent angle now from all the extra flab on him. The upper portions and sides of his large chest press into his arms like proofed dough smushed against more dough. The two breasts are larger than Mauvier’s flabby face now; both breasts manage to sit heavily atop his even heavier stomach despite all the flab packed into his chest that is close to cascading down his belly if not for the sheer size of his gut alone.
Mauvier’s figure a far cry from his former self, him ballooning in weight had been easy with both Alear and Griss to feed and stuff him. Unlike the morbidly obese knight, the two men still keep their trim, well kept for figures. Well, Alear does, Griss slowly starting to gain some extra heft now to even having a small starter belly that presses against his shirt coupled with a pair of thighs that fit snugly in his taut pants that are a couple pounds the point of being ill fitting.
The three men are currently retired for the night, all three in the comfortable confines of Alear’s enormous room that makes even his former room in the Somniel seem like a minor lordling’s. No expense withheld, the entire area is furnished with only the finest materials and extravagant adornments. A fact that Griss holds in high contention, every single piece of furniture crafted from the sturdiest of wood so as to not utter a single creak or groan even when under the stress of having to accommodate a minimum of 600 pounds of lard from Mauvier.
None of the furniture has to suffer from Mauvier’s occupancy at the moment. Only Griss lounges on the largest seat in the room. A couch that can fit five entire men with extra room to breathe for each one seems more fitting for the Somniel and Divine Dragon’s army a few years back than for just three men. Even now, the couch still has ample room whenever the three sit together. And with only him using it, Griss reclines against the velvet armrest that is carefully arched and curved to perfectly embrace one’s back. He also helps himself to the food on the table, carelessly picking at the fried, buttery bits of chicken for an after dinner appetizer and putting it all away with nothing more than a contented sigh and a pat to his gut.
Griss hears the shower still going on in the background as he diligently eats the food he himself put in front of him. “I might have to join and show them how to have some more fun if they don’t hurry up,” Griss makes no motion to get up despite the growing erection in his pants that press against the flab on his thighs. He doesn’t bother when he can hear his husbands fucking in the shower; the two tire themselves out, the heavy, potent thuds against the walls that slowly devolve into tired, meager thuds muddled with desperate exhausted moans. And just as planned, he hears the water turn off not too long after. Half of his plate is still left. By the time he reaches for the last bit of meat, the two freshly washed men come back from the adjacent bathroom.
Mauvier walks in first. The heavyset man waddles past the wide doorways with a sturdy grip on them to heave his enormous body past it. Mauvier is only clothed in his nightclothes, the attire made up only by a pair of far excruciatingly small shorts that pinch his thighs and fupa in all their enormity. Mauvier’s two globes for ass cheeks stick out the back of the shorts; the waistband only covers three quarters of their volume. Alear walks behind the muffin top Mauvier. He rests a hand on Mauvier’s side, right where the sides of his abs would be 400 pounds and countless binges ago. ‘Guiding’ him, Alear slowly pushes one of his husbands to the couch despite the two’s exhaustion. Alear’s shoulders notably sag more than Mauvier’s, the petite man having much less stamina than the other two. Mauvier also struggles with his own issues of moving with a far too stuffed gut, the wobbling mass of fat gurgling as he walks. Despite their earlier activities weighing them both down, Alear helps get Mauvier onto the couch just in time for Griss to stand and get out of the way.
“Oh I hope you don’t think I’m sitting myself out,” Mauvier right in the center of the massive, widespread couch, Griss gets comfortable on the floor. On his knees, he presses his face against Mauvier’s gut. He hugs the large sagging expanse that drapes off the couch itself. He wastes no time in picking up the speed of his fondling. Fingers grope at the lowest rivulets of flab on his gut, hands squish and jostle the stuffed belly, and his face sinks into the expansive fat right next to Mauvier’s cavernous navel. “Oh come now. Stop staring and join in,” Griss taunts Alear after pulling himself away for a quick breath. “I’m sure this pig has more than enough room for dessert,”
Mauvier only sits back on the couch. He rests both his heavy arms on the backrest, the two large, flabby arms framing his bloated, rounded out face. His mouth open, the older man’s moans come out in barely choked out sounds; barely able to hold himself back, the most he can do is close his eyes and try his best to keep himself down.
His mouth is swiftly closed by a large chunk of sugary sweet bread crammed inside. Alear shoves another piece the instant Mauvier finishes the first. “Sorry, you just seemed so hungry,” A large, embarrassed smile is spread across Alear’s face.
“When isn’t he hungry,” Griss removes himself from Mauvier’s gut and goes lower. He lifts the mass of fat with both his hands. The warm, plush lardscape of Mauvier’s thighs and underside of his stomach await him as he drapes the pile of blubber over his head. The sounds from Mauvier’s gut reverberate in his ear, the flab pressing into his head. “He just eats and eats. That’s all he’s good for anyways. And I deserve my reward for making sure such a greedy hog never goes hungry,” Griss laughs to himself. Sweat mars his face from the heat radiating off of Mauvier. Even after the shower, he still smells the faint musk coming from his dick. He tugs at Mauvier’s bulging shorts. The fabric strains from his fat pad, the soft curvature of the doughy fupa teasing and begging Griss to come closer. So he does, pulling and tugging at the taut fabric that resists giving him his coveted treasure.
Alear thankfully helps him by pulling from the sides. He sits on Mauvier’s churning gut that groans from the extra weight. He straddles the large mound of fat the best he can, giving Mauvier the rest of one bread—the knight dutifully and greedily devouring it—and helps pull the fabric down the best that he can. “I’m glad to see you enjoying yourself,” Alear gives his husband a quick peck on his porcine cheeks and fondles his breasts.
“Got it,” Griss wheezes out. His arms strain as he goes back to holding up Mauvier’s gut, a much harder task with Alear sitting on it. Mauvier’s fat pad exposed, Griss chuckles to himself as he sees only the tip of Mauvier’s engorged head poking out in between all the flab. “Since you can’t even reach it yourself, let good ol’ Griss give you a hand,” He pushes back Mauvier’s fat with his free hand. And without wasting another moment, Griss wraps his lips around his husband’s shaft.
Alear feels himself shaking as the seat beneath him wobbles. Mauvier’s gut keeps jiggling as Griss enjoys himself down there. Alear currently not feeding Mauvier, he instead tends to his gut the best that he can while sitting on it. Draping himself over his husband, his hands rub and care for the stuffed, churning mess for a gut. Alear nuzzles his neck, the large, swollen rolls making up his neck jiggling as he kisses them and his own cheek rubs against the fuzzy beard that makes Mauvier’s face look even fatter and more puffed out.
“M-more food,,,” Mauvier whines with both eyes closed and his head tilted back. His knees come close to buckling despite being seated. Both his tremendous thighs brought closer and squishing Griss while he desperately sucks him off.
Alear promptly reaches for the plate of food and begins to shovel more bread into his mouth. “I was worried that you might be full, but I guess I don’t need to worry about you ever being hungry,”
Griss’ face is unbearably hot as he continues to give Mauvier a messy blowjob. Even after taking and swallowing an entire load the instant Mauvier’s dick hit the back of throat, Griss coaxes another from him—the mild discomfort from being sucked dry only fair to him. And Griss receives Mauvier’s salty cum; he swallows the tired spurts that Mauvier’s spent, half hard dick ejaculates. He quickly pulls himself away and frees himself from underneath Mauvier’s expansive gut. Griss takes deep breaths of the fresh air as beads of sweat drip down his face. He only allows himself a brief respite as he stands up and drapes himself over Mauvier’s gut.
“Oh we’re only just getting started, hog. I hope you’re ready. Even the pure little Divine One can’t wait to do unspeakable things to you,”
Alear’s shame pressing against his own shorts, he practically humps his fat ass for a husband. “I’ll make sure to take good care of you,”
The two men give Mauvier a kiss on his cheeks. And for Mauvier’s part, all he does is let out a wheezed out moan, ready to enjoy the night with his husbands.
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1 for the short fic challenge?
For any fandom, if that's ok.
((Thanks!))
1: A conversation you wish had happened in canon.
Angela stands by, smiling, as Henry places his hand on Randall’s shoulder.
Randall flings his arms tightly around Henry’s neck, almost knocking Henry off his feet. Perhaps that’s a bit forward of Randall, after eighteen years without contact and an attempt to ruin the city, but it’s Randall.
Henry looks flustered. He peers apologetically at Angela over Randall’s shoulder. Angela shrugs lightly.
Henry has been waiting just as long as her to see Randall again. No one has worked harder than him to bring Randall home.
Why shouldn’t he be the first to hug Randall?
It’s only right that Mrs Ascot should go next.
Mrs Ascot wheels her way over to Randall, ignoring Sheffield’s warnings about the cracks in the ground.
Randall still can’t quite comprehend that his now-elderly mother is in a wheelchair. Still, he’s shocked by her strength as she pulls him to his knees. She gives him a small shake and a scolding, before she embraces him.
After a few minutes, Angela steps towards them. Randall glances up at her tearfully.
Angela smiles (though, it feels a bit forced) and offers him her hand.
Mrs Ascot releases Randall and Angela helps him up.
The two of them stare at each other.
Angela has imagined this moment for years. In her dreams, Randall always looked more like his teenage self— paler and scrawnier, with shorter hair and glasses.
But the man before her is tanned and robust, his hair untamed. Some might even call him a brute.
What does he make of Angela? Gone is that sweet, angelic girl from Stansbury. Now, she’s formal, reticent, and tired of waiting.
“Angie—“ Randall coughs. “Angela…”
She folds her arms. “Randall…”
He chokes out, “I’m sorry—“
“There’s nothing to forgive,” Angela says. Henry’s sincere, heartfelt words sound like a dismissal from her.
Randall holds his hand up. “Please, let me…” She nods and Randall continues in a rush, “I’m sorry for kidnapping you, for acting like I owned you… and f-for making you wait so long. You never had to wait for me, but you did— even if I don’t deserve it.”
“It wasn’t just about you,” Angela murmurs.
She turns; behind her, Henry is chuckling as Dalston eagerly waits in line to talk to Randall.
Hershel is watching them with a smile, but he’s standing further back besides an older bearded man she doesn’t recognise.
Hershel meets Angela’s gaze for a moment. There is fondness, forgiveness and sympathy in his eyes, but reluctance too.
Then he glances away— to Luke, the twelve-year-old boy Randall had threatened mere hours ago.
(Was that part of Jean Descole’s plan? How could Randall so blindly go along with such a senseless, cruel act?)
Angela looks back at Randall.
“In all honesty,” she whispers, clutching the pendant he gave her eighteen years ago, “I can’t forgive you yet. I’m not ready to be with you yet…”
Randall’s face falls, and Angela resists the urge to take back her confession.
She isn’t like Henry, who can forgive Randall, his parents and even Dalston in an instance. She can’t bury two decades’ worth of sorrow, solitude and anger just like that.
She held an underserved grudge against Hershel, for Randall’s fault. It’s only right that Randall should take some of the blame now that he’s home.
“But maybe… maybe we can start over?” Angela wonders, her voice wavering.
Randall gasps and beams at her— his smile is just as bright as she remembers.
He grabs her hand again, shaking it ecstatically.
“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Miss Angela!”
Angela’s smile is no longer forced. She squeezes his hand. “You too, Sir Randall.”
#Professor Layton#Angela Ledore#Henry Ledore#Randall Ascot#Hershel Layton#fanfic#my fics#Pl fic#RanHen#Randall/Angela#Rangela#They could get back together just not RIGHT NOW
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MLWTBB: Business Is Business
aka the (continued) journey into my self insert nonsense✨
chapter summary: while the Bad Batch is away on a mission, an oddly familiar Devaronian kicks Cid out of her parlor and takes it for himself, causing several problems for Hannah...
notes: this is a continuation of my story, “My Life With The Bad Batch”; I highly recommend reading that first before this one! I created a few new planets for this story. I’m also not 100% versed in SW terminology, so forgive me if some things are labeled incorrectly! each chapter will be rated accordingly, as opposed to the overall fic. lastly, there is romance in this story. hope you enjoy! 💙
add. notes: this chapter was edited and proofread by my sis @jam-n-ham! thanks sis!! 😋💙 also, in case it isn’t obvious, this story is my version of episode 13 “Infested”. I tried to stick to canon as much as possible, while also delving more into one of my favorite side characters in the show (please more of the Durand family in season two 🙏🏻)
Chapter 1, 2500+ words, rated G (there’s mentions of alcohol and that’s about it LOL)
next chapter
✨MLWTBB masterlist✨
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It was yet another slow Primeday at Cid’s Parlor. Hannah had woken up a bit late that morning, but thankfully Cid didn’t dock her for it. So far, only Bolo and Ketch were in the parlor, like usual. There was a bit of mess to clean up from the night before, but it didn’t take long for Hannah to get that taken care of. It was an extremely boring time, even more than usual.
All Hannah really hoped for now was that she would finally see her friends come walking through the door again. They had been gone for a few days on another mission for Cid, something Hannah was quite used to by this point. But she was extra lonely this time and missed them more than usual. She thought about how she was going to give Omega the biggest hug ever when they all got back. She imagined Wrecker joining in and scooping both her and Omega up into a squeeze fest between the three of them. She pondered the sort of snide comments Tech and Echo might say about their mission, as they often did whenever they came back to the parlor. She dreamed about seeing Hunter again, the man she loved with all her heart, and telling him how much she missed him as she ran her fingers through his long, dark brown hair. It would be absolutely wonderful.
Suddenly, footsteps could be heard coming down the stairs towards the parlor. Hannah’s heart leapt into her throat, desperately wishing it was who she thought it was.
But it wasn’t. Not even close.
Several intimidating looking men in dark armor came flooding into the parlor, each of them carrying a weapon. Hannah bolted upright from the counter she’d been leaning against, unsure of what to do. Then another figure came stepping in, quite confidently. It was a male Devaronian with green skin, wearing a nice suit and holding some sort of small lizard creature in his arms. He was obviously the leader of this group. The room went silent as the Devaronian looked around, surveying the place.
Hannah had a moment of panic at the sight of him. Memories of Volruna flooded into her head, with the man in front of her briefly being replaced by the visage of Vin Drazundr instead. She had to literally shake herself back to reality and exhaled deeply. Then she looked to Bolo and Ketch, who were completely frozen in place. With a deep breath, she gathered up all her courage and decided to approach the newcomer. “Uhh, hello! Can I help you?”
The Devaronian adjusted the collar of his shirt before answering her. “I’m looking for Cid. Would you happen to know where she is?”
Cid wasn’t expecting anybody today to Hannah’s knowledge. She knew what she was supposed to do in situations like this. “I might... who exactly is looking for her, if I might ask?”
“Roland,” the Devaronian replied proudly. “Roland Durand. A pleasure to make your acquaintance.”
The name didn’t ring a bell to Hannah at all. The way he was acting though made it out like he was important in some way. Regardless, she didn’t like the vibe she was getting from this guy at all. It unfortunately reminded her of Vin again. “Yeah, a pleasure. I’m sorry, what is your business with Cid? It’s kind of my job to ask so she doesn’t get bothered unnecessarily.”
Roland chuckled. “Adorable. You’ll be a fun bartender, I’m sure.”
Hannah blinked in shock. “Excuse me?”
Roland then made a hand signal to the armored men, who began searching the entire parlor. Bolo and Ketch tried to avoid them as much as possible, insisting they were just there as patrons; eventually, they just ran out of the parlor altogether. Hannah opened her mouth to try and retort to what was going on, but Roland silenced her. Then one of the men discovered the back room and alerted Roland about it. Again, Hannah tried to speak, but was stopped by Roland.
“Be a dear and whip up some drinks for me and my men, would you?” he said as he walked towards the back room.
Hannah stood in place, completely dumbfounded. She was wrong before; this guy was somehow worse than Vin. “Jerk didn’t even tell me what kind of drink he wanted...”
Despite her curiosity, Hannah kept herself away from the room, much to her discretion. She knew Cid had told her to stay out of stuff like this in case there was trouble, but she couldn’t help wanting to rush in and at least see what was going on.
It didn’t take long before Hannah got her answer. The door to Cid’s room slid open, catching Hannah’s attention immediately. To her surprise, Cid was walking out of the hallway, hands in the air, with Roland and some of the armored men behind her.
“What’s going on?” Hannah exclaimed.
“A simple change of hands, sweetheart,” Roland replied. “Nothing more.”
“More like a hostile takeover,” Cid retorted. She saw the concerned look on Hannah’s face and reassured her, “Don’t worry, Red. This ain’t permanent.”
“You’d like to think that, wouldn’t you?” Roland said slyly. “Get her out of my parlor, would you, boys?”
Hannah scoffed. “Your parlor?”
As the armored men began literally shoving Cid out, she turned to Roland, shouting, “You better not lay a hand on her, Roland! You’re not her type!”
Roland rolled his eyes and scoffed before turning to Hannah. “Congratulations, you’re now a part of the Durand syndicate. You can thank me by getting those drinks I asked for earlier.”
Hannah was once again too dumbfounded to even move. She felt Roland step closer towards her and instinctively backed away.
“Now, now,” he reassured her. “No need to fret. I’m not your enemy, I promise. In fact, I’ll gladly double whatever Cid was paying you before as a show of my sincerity.”
Hannah scowled at him. “Why do I have a hard time believing that?”
Roland chuckled. “You’re a feisty one. Just do as I say, and you’ll have nothing to worry about.” He gave her a sly look before returning to the back room. A look similar to the one Vin first gave her at the Prism Palace.
Now Hannah knew she definitely had something to worry about.
*********************
The following day, Hannah decided to conveniently avoid the parlor as long as she could. It didn’t matter what Roland said, or even what he tried to do, there was no way she was going to work for someone like him. Especially while she was alone. Then again, that entire situation would never have happened in the first place if the Bad Batch were there. Hannah began imagining scenarios where the five of them had put a stop to Roland’s takeover of the parlor, if only just to keep herself sane.
In the back of her mind though, she worried. Any number of things could happen between then and whenever her friends actually came back to Ord Mantell. And Roland’s words from the day before still concerned her. She tried to not think about it, but her worries were too strong. The fact that nearly everything about Roland reminded her of Vin didn’t help either.
Maybe she could just leave. She could find somewhere else to stay until the Bad Batch came back and fixed everything. Mrs Ygreu had always said her place was open if Hannah ever wanted to visit, maybe she could go there.
No, Hannah didn’t want anyone else to get involved in this mess unnecessarily. She had to ride this out on her own, as much as she hated it. Maybe Roland would just leave her alone if she stayed away long enough...
Suddenly, there was a knock on her door. Hannah’s heart skipped a beat. Initially, she thought it might be one of the Clones finally coming back. Nobody ever visited other than them or Cid. Maybe it was Cid. Hannah hadn’t seen her since the day before. Did anybody else even know where she lived?
Another knock on the door. Hannah’s heart began racing. She had to know who it was. Throwing caution to the wind, Hannah went over to the door and opened it without a second thought, hoping beyond hope it was someone she knew.
Unfortunately, it was the one person she knew that she wished she didn’t.
“Ahh, there you are,” said the recognizable voice of Roland. His lizard-like pet, Ruby, was in his arms and two armored men stood behind him. “I was worried when you didn’t come in today. Is there a problem I should know about?”
Hannah almost laughed. “It’s my day-off,” she replied, a visible scowl on her face.
Roland pursed his lips and hummed. “Good to know.” His eyes began scanning the room behind her curiously. “Interesting space you have here. Mind if I give it a better look?”
Hannah’s eyes narrowed. “Depends. What’ll you do if I refuse?”
A snicker escaped from Roland’s fanged grin. “I think you already know the answer to that, sweetheart.”
There was a familiar pang in Hannah’s chest. Her breath caught in her throat, and a shiver ran down her back. It took her a moment to remember that she was talking to Roland and not Vin.
Without waiting for a response, Roland pushed his way past Hannah into the room. The armored men stayed outside, but waited in the doorway.
“Quite the collection you’ve got in here,” Roland said as he walked through the space. “Although I doubt all of this stuff is yours.” He gestured to one of the large crates against the wall and chuckled.
“It was part of our agreement,” Hannah told him, her arms crossed with a stern look on her face.
“How noble of you,” Roland responded. He snapped his fingers and pointed at the crate. The two armored men came into the room and began dragging the crate out of the apartment. “And now it won’t bother you ever again.”
Hannah maintained the stern look on her face. She could see what Roland was trying to do, and it wasn’t going to work. “What do you want from me, Roland?”
The small lizard creature in Roland’s arms began growling happily as her owner rummaged through Hannah’s fridge. “A drink would be nice,” Roland responded, pulling out a piece of food for Ruby to munch on. “But apparently, it’s your day off.” He sat down on one of the kitchen stools with Ruby in his lap, happily munching on the snack she’d been given. “That’s alright though. You’ll have plenty of time to make up for it tomorrow.”
The hairs on the back of Hannah’s neck were beginning to stand on end in anger. She walked up closer to Roland from behind the kitchen island with a mighty scowl on her face. “I’m not coming back tomorrow. Or the day after that. Or ever again.”
A small smirk grew on Roland’s face. “Defiance will get you nothing but trouble, dollface. And really, what reason do you have to be that way anyway? I haven’t done anything harmful to you.”
“You stole Cid’s Parlor from her!” Hannah exclaimed, nearly slamming her fist on the counter.
“So?” Roland bluntly responded. “How does that hurt you, exactly? You’ve still got your job. Your home. I’ve even helped clean up this place a bit for you.” He snapped his fingers again, and the armored men returned to carry out another one of the crates from the room. “There, I just did it again. You’re welcome.”
Hannah shook her head, the scowl still firmly in place. “I don’t care. I know how people like you work. You’re not the first crime boss I’ve encountered, and I doubt you’ll be the last.”
“Living here on Ord Mantell?” Roland said with a scoff. “That’s for certain.”
Hannah took a few steps closer, now standing directly in front of Roland from behind the counter. Her tone was laden with malice as she spoke. “You can try to sweet talk me all you want, but it won’t make a difference. I work for Cid, not you.”
Once again, Roland snickered behind his fanged grin. “Quite the loyal employee, aren’t you? A good quality to have.” He took Ruby off of his lap and placed her on the counter between himself and Hannah. The little lizard creature looked up at Hannah and growled before snuggling up to Roland’s hand. “You’re better off putting that tenacity of yours to good use down at the parlor than trying to intimidate me.”
Hannah’s hands came slamming down on the counter so hard, it spooked Ruby. “Quit messing with me, Roland! I already told you, I’m not coming back! I don’t care what you do; take my whole apartment away if you want, I don’t care! I’d rather live on the streets than work for someone like you.”
The entire time Hannah was yelling, Roland’s expression remained calm. If anything, he seemed entertained by her outburst, with the small smirk returning to his face again. Once Hannah had finished, Roland chuckled to himself and began petting Ruby to calm her down.
“I wonder if Cid feels the same way,” he slyly responded. “I wonder if that’s why she’s stuck around.” He looked Hannah directly in the face, still smirking slightly. “I wonder... how things might change if she suddenly wasn’t around anymore?”
The serious determination on Hannah’s face began to fade. Her eyes went wide with realization, and she began to slink back away from Roland.
“I’m really not asking for much, sweetheart,” Roland said, shaking his head. “Just keep doing what you’re doing, and you’ll be fine. Cid will be fine too. It’s that simple. Or, we could make things more difficult, if that’s what you really want.” He slid off the stool and came up beside her, almost uncomfortably close. Hannah could just feel the smirk spreading across his face. “I don’t know about you, but I much prefer when things aren’t so complicated.”
Hannah said nothing and just stood still, absorbing Roland’s words and practically shaking from the weight of it all. Roland left her side and told her to enjoy the rest of her day off as he headed for the door with Ruby still in his arms. He paused in the doorway briefly to turn back to Hannah and said, “See you bright and early tomorrow, dollface.”
And with that, he was finally gone. Hannah was left alone in her kitchen, still shaken by the entire experience. She felt like crying and throwing up at the same time. With shaky hands, she leaned over the counter, resting her head in her hands and breathing heavily, with small sobs gradually creeping out.
In the back of her mind, she could hear Cid’s voice berating her for being so foolish. She wasn’t worth the trouble, is what Cid would tell Hannah. Save yourself, she would absolutely say. But Hannah couldn’t do it. She wasn’t going to sacrifice Cid’s life just so she could avoid working for Roland. Even Irridas back at the Prism Palace hadn’t been that cruel.
If working for Roland is what would keep Cid safe, then she would do it, no questions asked.
#the bad batch#star wars the bad batch#would y'all believe that I wrote this over a YEAR ago??#well the first half of it anyway LOL#I wrote most of this story before ever finishing the og MLWTBB#cause that's just how my brain works haha#star warz#my storiez
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DEALING WITH FAILURES - LEADING TO SUCCESS”
There are two ways to deal with failures -
you can engage in self-loathing, or you can leverage your failures to lead you to success.
One must not forget that every success is a result of a chain of failures. Look at your failures from a different perspective and they might actually help you move towards your goal. Expert Larry Shaffer highlights five lessons one can learn from their failures:
⭐️Embrace the fail-fast philosophy. Make mistakes, immediately gain feedback, and rectify them.
⭐️Do not consider failures as setbacks, but as stepping stones to success.
⭐️View failures as a sign that the current strategy is not working and needs a change.
⭐️Consider failures as valuable experiences that you can look back on when you face similar crisis situations.
⭐️Failures keep your humility intact and keep you grounded.
The mind has a powerful way of attracting things that are in harmony with it, good and bad..!!
We should always remember that we are empowered with the Mind power , which is one of the strongest and most useful powers in our possession. This power, together with our imagination, can create success or failure, happiness or unhappiness, opportunities or obstacles. Our minds have the ability to influence how we interpret and respond to the events and circumstances around us..!!
However, it is important to note that adjusting our mindset does not mean denying or ignoring the challenges and problems that exist in the world. It is about consciously choosing how we perceive and respond to those challenges. By maintaining a balanced perspective, acknowledging difficulties, and actively seeking solutions, we can contribute to positive change and work towards making the world a better place..!!
Great minds have purposes, others have wishes..!!
It's important to note that while external factors and influences play a role in shaping our sense of self, we also have the capacity to consciously shape and redefine our mindset. We have the ability to make choices and take actions that align with our values and aspirations, allowing us to create a more authentic and fulfilling sense of self..!!
Our choices and actions play a significant role in shaping our sense of self and direct us towards the path of success. By consciously aligning our choices and actions with our values and aspirations, we can actively shape our destination. Self-awareness provides a foundation for intentional self-creation. By exploring our inner world, we can gain a deeper understanding of ourselves. Our sense of self is not fixed but can evolve over time as we gain new insights, learn from our mistakes, and pursue personal growth..!!
We may face many defeats in life, but never should let ourself be defeated..!!
Linda Poindexter ,a great philosopher has said, “One small crack does not mean that you are broken; it means that you were put to the test and you didn’t fall apart.”
That is indeed true. We know a lot of folks who, when put to the test, tripped and didn’t get back up again, or they decided that if it can’t be perfect they’ll just stop. or, worse yet, some don’t even try. That doesn’t make any sense, when in reality trying is what we’re after..!!
Life isn’t meant to be perfect, we all make mistakes. We all have wounds. By shifting our perspective that our wounds have made us stronger rather than mark us as a weakling. Steve Maraboli is famous for saying, “This life is for loving, sharing, learning, smiling, caring, forgiving, laughing, hugging, helping, dancing, wondering, healing, and even more loving. I choose to live life this way” And I hope we all should remember that..!!
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Welcome Home (Najwa Zebian)
Introduction
If you sometimes feel lost, helpless, or broken, you’re not alone. What you need – what we all need – is a home. Not a house, a home: a place where you feel safe, seen, and loved.
Too often, we build our homes in other people; we rely on the validation, comfort, and approval of others. But this inevitably leaves us desperately holding on to love when we find it, and we feel abandoned if the other person leaves.
This Book will teach you how to build a home within yourself. You’ll discover and furnish all the different rooms of the home – each with a specific purpose – through a unique set of tools that’ll help you be comfortable and satisfied with who you are and what you do.
So in your mind, stand in front of the house’s door. Take a deep breath, and step inside. No need to knock – after all, this is your home.
From this book, you’ll learn
to recognize the love that’s already around you;
how to separate your pain from the thing that hurt you;
and the difference between an emotion and a feeling.
....
Lesson one : before you can be loved by others, you need to learn to love yourself.
Picture someone you love. It can be a friend, a partner, a family member – anyone you care for deeply. Now imagine them coming to you with a problem. Maybe they have a bad headache, or they’re stressed out at work. Or maybe they’re going through a tough breakup and need someone to talk to. What would you say to them?
Chances are, you’d do whatever you could to make them feel better. You’d sit them down and find a painkiller for their headache. You’d ask them about their day at work. You’d tell them that it’s going to be alright. You’d do these things because you love them.
Now imagine that it’s you who’s going through that suffering. Would you be as kind and patient with yourself as with your friend? If your answer is no, then you need to work on the first room in the house: self-love.
Self-love means being empathetic toward yourself. It's a skill that involves treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding you show others rather than defining yourself by the external love you receive or want. Remember, you're here to build a home within yourself.
Love is a power that's inside of you. When you give your love to someone else, you shouldn't feel empty. The key is to first use it to strengthen yourself; then you’ll have more, even infinite, love to direct outward.
Self-love means embracing yourself for who you are, but it also exists in your ability to recognize and receive the love around you. Sometimes, like when we’re in chronic pain or caught up in the emotions of others, we forget that there’s love out there for us – and that it’s not selfish to let it in.
So here’s a simple activity you can practice to help develop your self-love. Every morning, tell yourself, “Today I am going to see proof that I am worthy of love.” Keep this in mind throughout the day, and collect all the affirmations of your worth: a smile, a friendly conversation, a nice text message.
When you look back on these small acts of love at the end of the day, remember that you’re not trying to define your worth through some external source. Rather, your ability to recognize love in the world around you is already the proof you need. In short, let yourself see love, and you’ll realize you’re worthy of it.
Once you’ve spent some time meditating on these thoughts in the Self-love room, you can move on to the room of Forgiveness.\
....
Lesson Two : Use forgiveness to free yourself from your pain.
We’re all weighed down by pain. It could be from a friend who broke our trust, or the blame we pile on ourselves for a poor decision we made. Whether this pain comes from our own actions or the actions of others, the only way to truly heal and feel at home within ourselves is through forgiveness.
This is the next room you need to build and furnish.
The first thing you need to know about forgiveness is that it’s only about you. You can’t wait for an apology that may never come, or dwell on actions you may never understand. The thing that hurt you can’t be the thing that heals you. Only you can do that.
It’s OK to have something or someone to forgive. After all, you can’t control the fact that you’ve been hurt, but you can decide what to do with that pain. The forgiveness room isn’t a secret vault where you hide your suffering – it’s an open space where you can let go of anything you’re holding on to, whether they’re thoughts, feelings, or resentments.
Forgiveness is about release. Let go of the idea that you have to go back to being the person you were before. That person is gone, but don’t worry. Now you can pick up the broken pieces, examine them, understand them, and put them into the new you.
Unless you can forgive, you’ll always be tied to the person who hurt you – like a marionette with strings stretching off into the past, unable to move with true freedom and comfort. Wouldn’t it be nice to cut those strings?
There’s a simple but powerful tool you can use to do this: reflect on the events you need to forgive using “I” statements. These statements were made popular in the 1960s for conflict resolution, but they’re also an effective way to shift the focus from other peoples’ actions back to you.
When trying to forgive a friend who lied to you, it might be tempting to say, “She lied to me!” or “She broke my trust!” A more productive statement would be, “I felt sad when she lied to me because it made me feel like I wasn’t worthy of the truth.” Now your forgiveness and healing aren’t about the other person – they’re about you.
These “I” statements follow a simple structure. Start with “I feel” to pinpoint whatever emotion you’re dealing with. Then continue with “when,” followed by the event you’re trying to forgive. Finally, express why it made you feel the way you do by saying “because,” followed by your reason.
Using this formula separates your healing from the person who hurt you. Keep it in a convenient spot in the forgiveness room in your home. When you’re struggling to forgive or let go of something that has pained you, enter this room and find the tools and space to begin healing.
.....
Lesson Three : Be in control of who you’re letting into your life.
The home you’re building inside yourself is a place of safety, a place where you’re comfortable living as your authentic self. But that doesn’t mean it’s a place of solitude. Just like any home, you can and should invite others into your heart.
It’s time to focus on the next room – the only one of your rooms that’s meant for others. This is the room of Compassion.
Imagine you’re having a dinner party, and you’re preparing to let people into the intimacy of your home. Are you going to invite everyone? Probably not! You need to prepare a guest list. Let’s take a look at this list. Who’s on it? What are the criteria?
The first and most important guest is also the easiest to overlook: you. It’s your house and your dinner party – you’re the host. You need to be able to show compassion for yourself, and not be so concerned with serving the other guests that you forget your own plate. If you find this idea difficult, take a moment to reflect in the Self-love room.
So, who else is on your guest list? You wouldn’t invite total strangers who haven’t earned your trust, nor would you invite people who’ve hurt you or someone you care about. Know that it’s OK to turn away any guest who shows up uninvited. And if you find a guest disrespecting you in your house, remember that you’re under no obligation to invite them back next time.
These unwanted guests can also take the form of opinions or societal pressures. Unspoken rules about how you should look, what you should wear, and how you should live are constantly reinforced by social media. Try unfollowing negative social media accounts to keep these unwelcome guests at bay.
After you’ve decided who you don’t want to let into your home, it’s time to decide who you will let in. You can approach this by building boundaries. This is when you determine whether the behaviors and opinions of others are acceptable or not. You shouldn’t expect others to change to fit your boundaries; instead, the focus should always be on you and what you find acceptable.
How do you set boundaries? First you need to know yourself, so ask yourself what’s important to you. Once again, the Self-love room is useful here. After that, you can start setting your boundaries using the “I” statement tool you left in the Forgiveness room.
These statements are personal and can change based on the people you’re considering. You’ll likely have different boundaries for family, friends, coworkers, and strangers. A boundary could be something like, “I will say no when I feel uncomfortable” or “I will not put up with disrespectful behavior to protect the feelings of others.”
Once you have these boundaries, it’s important to reinforce and stick to them. You wouldn’t change the height of a fence to accommodate how high someone else can jump.
With your Compassion room complete, you now have a safe method of letting people in and out of your home. Now it’s time to turn the focus back to yourself in the Clarity room.
....
Lesson Four : Examine yourself with care and honesty.
Who are you? Chances are, your answer involves a mixture of experiences, jobs, physical attributes, family members, and cultural and religious expectations – everything that culminates in the consciousness of the person sitting here now
Do you have a clear picture? It’s common to feel like other people don’t see us for who we really are. But can you truly say that you can see yourself?
Welcome to the Clarity room, where mirrors hang from wall to wall. This is the room you come to for self-reflection. It’s where you can peel away the layers and see your authentic self – not how others see you, or how you think you should be. You’re here to discover the actual you.
Sometimes, it’ll be difficult to see your reflection. The mirrors might be blurred by guilt or confusion or anger. This is your body telling you that something’s wrong. You can use these emotions as tools to help you understand where you need to focus. Listen to your gut – it’ll help you choose the appropriate mirror.
Let’s have a look at some of these mirrors.
The first one is the blank canvas mirror. List everything that defines your life now. Does that actually reflect you? If you had a choice, would that list look the same? If you could rewrite your life onto a blank canvas, what would be different? Think about what’s keeping you from the life you choose.
Next is the purpose mirror. Look at your actions, and ask if they align with your goals in life. If not, what needs to change?
If you’re unsure about what your goals are, look in the intention mirror. Ask yourself why you’re really doing what you’re doing. For example, you could ask, “Why am I trying to get this new job?” or “Why am I posting this on social media?” It doesn’t matter what your intention is, but it’s useful to be aware.
Do you ever feel like you’re avoiding some thought or emotion? Take a look in the escape mirror and ask yourself, “What am I escaping from?” Once you have an answer, you can allow that feeling to leave your home.
There’s also the real-story mirror, where you can reflect on the stories you’re telling yourself, examine whether they’re true, and consider whether they’re helpful to believe. Take a story like “He doesn’t think I’m good enough.” Is this true? It’s likely that you don’t know for sure. Is it useful to believe it? Definitely not.
You can place many types of mirrors in the Clarity room. Think of them as tools for whatever honest self-reflection you need.
With this knowledge of your authentic self, you are now ready to explore the final room: Surrender.
....
Lesson Five : Surrender to yourself.
You’re nearly done exploring the home you’re building in your soul. It feels good, doesn’t it? You feel safe and self-aware in ways you never have before. Suddenly, you hear a knock on the door. You’re not expecting guests – who could it be?
You peek through the keyhole, and there it is: The negative emotion you’ve been avoiding. The pain you don’t want to deal with. The thought you don’t want to explore. You could try waiting it out in another room, but you know the knocking is just going to get louder. This house isn’t a place for you to hide; it’s a place for you to live.
Luckily, you have a room specifically for dealing with these unwanted but unavoidable guests – the Surrender room. This is the room you enter to experience your true emotions, and it’s where you become aware of the habits and patterns you might be using to avoid these emotions. Let’s step inside.
First, you need to understand the relationship between emotions and feelings. A feeling comes from the meaning you attach to the emotion you’re having. Take the emotion of disappointment. This is experienced through the feeling that something you wanted to happen didn’t happen. You’re always aware of your feelings; emotions, on the other hand, can happen unconsciously.
Have you ever experienced an emotion – for instance, anxiety, anger, or sadness – and not been able to say why? This is because you weren't letting yourself feel the emotion. It’s these unconscious emotions that knock on your door the loudest.
So let them in. Have tea with them. Give yourself the time to stop resisting. Truly understand what emotion you are experiencing – and why. This will empower you to accept and release the emotion as you see fit.
And it’s not just the negative emotions you need to meet. It’s easy to forget that positive emotions need to be acknowledged and validated too. Whatever emotion is knocking, give it the time it needs in the Surrender room.
Surrendering is about facing reality. Just because something is familiar doesn’t mean it’s the way it has to be. Survive in a bad situation long enough, and it becomes living in a bad situation, which then becomes thriving in a bad situation.
One day, the idea of changing that situation becomes unfamiliar and scary. The pain of dealing with a bad relationship becomes more bearable than the pain of breaking up and dealing with the unfamiliar. Only by surrendering to the reality of the unfamiliar can you actually begin to change your life for the better.
You can become more comfortable with the unfamiliar by shifting your focus to what you want to be familiar. First, write down what thoughts, feelings, behaviors, and relationships tend to come easily and naturally to you. This is your familiar – your normal.
Next, write down what you want to be thinking, doing, or feeling instead. By acknowledging these things as simply new rather than scary, you can start on the path to redefining what’s familiar to you.
Now it’s time to turn your attention back to that unwanted guest who’s knocking at the door of your new home. How long have they been there, knocking louder and louder? Maybe it’s time you opened that door.
.....
Final summary
Congrats, you’ve learned how important it is to listen to your authentic self. If you’d like to immerse yourself in this idea, find a quiet place, sit by yourself, and try to listen to what your inner voice is telling you.
Chances are, the voice you hear is not your own. It may be a sense of self that you’re convinced is real because of your life experiences or what others have told you about yourself. Push past this inner voice. It’s not you. Your authentic self is the one listening to this inner voice. It’s not defined by yourself or others. It doesn’t come from anything external.
You can’t get your sense of worth from someone else. All of your love, forgiveness, and compassion is inside of you. This is your power, and it exists apart from the outside world. When you’re aware of who you truly are – and fully accept this being – you can be at home within yourself.
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Finishing Soft > Finishing Strong
It has been quite the year. God has taught me so much about himself, and Ephesians 3:20 comes to mind a lot- God is one who is able to do immeasurably more than I can ask or imagine. I came into this year feeling really overwhelmed (trying to be strong and balance a lot of work with a lot of emotions but miserably falling short) and didn't even know what to ask from God for the new year. So expectations weren't high, but looking back on the work He's done, I know that even if I came in with mile-high expectations, what God gave me was far greater.
January was when seeds were planted- for the first time, I felt a desperate need for emotional support. The stress of traveling in a new place during peak-COVID with multiple trip interruptions was too overwhelming, and I saw the value of having someone around who holds you up when you can't do it yourself, and this highly independent lifestyle of mine may need to change.
June was when the heart transformation began, kick-started by the Learning to Let Go sermon series at church. Right from the start, I felt the urge to re-examine my attitude towards my dad, and subsequently dating, and every week felt like another push to probe deeper and self-confront sub-optimal behavioral patterns I've noticed in my life. Some reflections and key takeaways from the sermon series:
1. Jesus gives new meaning to the cycles of dying and rising. The Paschal mystery can be applied to metaphorical deaths in our lives, and death never has the final word. After death comes resurrection, grieving, letting go, and finally, new life.
2. The biggest "death" in my life has been my relationship with my father. Death was the middle/high school years where I witnessed borderline unfaithfulness in my parents' marriage and was harassed on the phone by a mystery pervert for a full year. The damage was reinforced by years of hearing my dad constantly raise his voice at my mom over matters of no importance. I always downplayed this because others go through far worse things-- actual divorces in the family, rape and sexual abuse. But all the "small" happenings did lead to something serious for me- a twisted view of marriage, making that and relationships things from which I distanced myself.
I think a good metaphor for this is being someone who finds themselves deep in a pit, looking around and seeing nothing but walls and wondering...what happened? There was no bulldozing (except maybe a bit at the beginning) and I never noticed myself descending into a pit, but the continual yelling over the years added up, like one shovelful of dirt at a time that gradually deepened the pit.
Also experienced a love deficit- my dad didn't say he didn't love me or rejected me, but also he never said he loved me. Missing the sense of security and protection from a father was like a perceived rejection and led to an unnatural desire to protect myself and a reluctance to take risks.
This repeated thought pattern led to decisions to "always be OK" and values of self-protection and lifestyle of living behind walls and eventually bondage to this fear of rejection if I come out from the walls I've come to know as home.
3. Next comes resurrection- coming to know Christ, understanding that the perfection I expected from my dad only comes from God, that we are all sinners who need to forgive one another, that there is hope when losses are redeemed and even turned into good. I accepted and believed all these things, but never truly felt them in my heart.
4. Grieving is what I have been stuck in for nearly 15 years. I knew something was amiss, but never directly addressed the issue. Freedom class at church back in 2016 brought a lot of awareness and was the first real step I took, but my years of young adulthood were mostly spent prioritizing fun adventures with friends, working, and growing in independence. I'm grateful that these other parts of life went extremely well- except for a few periods when I was down about certain boys, most of the time was spent happily exploring new cities, trying local brunch spots and foreign delicacies, and finding joy in new hobbies like running, cycling, and snowboarding. I made half-hearted efforts to patch the relationship with my dad, but efforts to be kind/patient/loving etc often fell short.
5. Letting go requires:
Faith. Saying 'yes' to God requires letting go of me-in-control, trusting in God and His plan rather than what we see directly in front of us, our own expectations of outcomes and expectations of God
Biblical example: Jairus wanted healing for his daughter but contrary to expectations, she died. But God brought her back from the dead and he got his daughter back and witnessed resurrection instead. God disillusions us at the right time so our trust is in Him and not our own perceptions of God and things God "should" do for us.
Focus on knowns (elements of God's character we've personally experienced in the past) instead of unknowns (all that could go wrong). God doesn't want us to know the future but to be saturated with his presence today.
What I see is all the things that could go wrong and a repeated cycle of hurting and breaking. Human nature prevents me from seeing much farther than that. Need to let faith in God be bigger than my fears
Discernment between fear that warns and fear that possesses. Counter memorials of fear with memorials of God's goodness.
Repent of the sin of agreeing with fear
2 Tim 1:7- For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control
6. New life came at the end of July, when dad just so happened to fly into town the day I was moving. He originally had a layover but that morning, his flight changed to a direct flight and he was able to arrive in the afternoon. I told him to just rest at the hotel and I’d meet him for dinner as originally planned, but instead of doing that or asking to sightsee, he insisted on helping me move. Having his support on a day when I was so emotionally distressed and in need meant the world, and it was the first time I felt like I could accept his love again. To see how he sacrifices, puts aside his own injuries for the sake of helping me move was so moving (ha ha). Two days later, the government approved my green card, putting an end to over a decade of waiting, tears, and endless inconveniences around school/job/risking deportation. Never have I had blessings just drop in my lap and see things go my way so effortlessly, and I am so glad God brought me onto a "mountaintop" to teach me about his character- how much He sees and cares about the pain I carry, how powerfully He redeems in his perfect timing. 3 things I experienced:
Repentance: realizing the log in my own eye for holding things against my dad for so long. Yes, he did sin, but I've sinned too in holding onto unforgiveness for so long and it's ultimately on me to let go.
Redemption: I feel like I experience this every day. Two of my biggest blockers to healing (my hardened heart + lack of a green card) were resolved within days of each other. I felt seen by God- I knew that all the furious, frustrated prayers I lifted up in the past were heard, and this was His plan all along to tie it together in a crucial moment like this. Letting go felt like something I could never do myself, but these signs from God reassured me that He is behind all of this and helps me to do what I can never do on my own (just like how Jesus came to die for our sins and restore our relationship with God, something we never could've accomplished ourselves). I'm constantly reminded of God's love, goodness, presence and power.
Resurrection: the final step in the process was in October, when I visited home and got to celebrate dad's 65th birthday in person. My heart was different this time around- I actually wanted to keep the conversation going in the car and asked about his life, I wanted to do something special with him on his birthday (went fishing together where I caught my first fish!), and I wanted to love him the way I love everyone else around me (baking him a cake!). At long last, I felt lightness as I found myself finally able to put aside the anger, hate and resentment I've carried all these years and instead can receive God's blessings in a relationship with my dad. It's been so healing to share with friends as well, who affirm the growth and new 'softness' in me and encourage me to continue stepping out in faith (need to push myself every day to not retreat back into the old life).
Here I am in November, having had the most emotional year of my life. It hasn't been easy, but the hope that God is working and drawing me into more of His light and grace has kept me going. I'm excited to continue claiming His promises and victories, to move on from my winter season into a blossoming spring and eventually/hopefully bear much fruit when I reach summer. Currently in a season of reframing my past and learning to see past wounds that held me back are soooo small in the context of how big and great God is. Two of my favorite verses that I continue to hold onto:
John 10:10 The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full
Deuteronomy 31:8 The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.
Looking to next year, I want to remind myself any steps I take forward into dating is bravery and progress, and I have to show myself grace. Also, I am tired of holding back! And this is the year for my choices to reflect my hopes and not my fears! I have nothing to lose! This is a learning opportunity to grow in a severely under-developed area of my life! Need to continue praying for humility and courage to stay the course, but I’m happy I can finally move onward rooted in love and hope instead of fear and doubt.
With each new year in the past, I've always made goals to be "stronger." Physically, I wanted to run and bike more miles. Spiritually, I wanted to grow in my knowledge of the Word and memorize verses. Professionally, I wanted to get promoted and keep on climbing the corporate ladder. It was always growth, growth, growth. I prided myself on strength, independence, and my ability to navigate the world on my own. And while this is great, I am realizing there are other ways to live. I liked to be strong so I can brace for impact, feel protected by my own strength and the walls I've built. But today, I learned about cats falling from high buildings (lol) and how they're able to survive because they can relax in the air and turn themselves around to land on their feet. I don't always have to be hardened and strong to keep moving forward, I can be soft and miraculously absorb the impact and continue on my way.
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GUILT
+Keisuke Baji x reader
+Baji seeing you cry for the first time.
+warning/s: lil' angst, cursing.
+word count: 2723
You tapped your pen anxiously against your desk, more than ready to sprint the fuck out of the classroom.
You kept looking back and forth to your phone, your teacher and the clock. No control at all over the anxiety creeping into your system as time passes by.
Earlier, when you were just about to answer an exam you received a message from Mitsuya. You almost ignored it because you want to be as focused as you can be on the exam because you're not one to take studying lightly.
But thank goodness you did peek at it, but when you did your heart literally fell to your stomach and the whole world felt like it crashed down on top of you, full weight all on you, crushing you.
The message goes: Hey, you're probably taking an exam right now so I don't want to bother you, but I know for a fact you wouldn't forgive us if no one informed you about this right now. Baji, he's badly wounded right now. He confronted the men from the other gang that had disrespected Mikey, and he got beat up, pretty badly. It's so bad we needed to take him to the hospital. I can't really tell you not to panic or worry, but please try to stay as calm as you can. We got him. We'll look after him until you can come.
So there you are contemplating whether you should be relieved that you had read it right away or maybe you should've just read it after the exams so that you wouldn't feel like just fleeing right now. You never answered an exam so fast in your life.
After what seems like an eternity, the papers are finally submitted and you're dismissed. You fled the classroom in a flash, not even bothering to put your stuff back in your bag properly.
You power walked to the hospital, your heart pounding hard through your chest as if it's about to jump out. On your way there, there is nothing on your mind but Baji being in a fucked up state right now, because they don't usually have to be taken to the hospital. Even if they're all messed up they never really get patched up in the hospital, so Baji being admitted to the hospital means he's just NOT OKAY. He might just be in a gruesome state.
"You better be fucking okay or I'll beat you up even more." You mumbled through gritted teeth, sniffling, holding back the tears threatening to fall.
When you finally got to the hospital and got that hospital scent, shivers ran down your spine. You hate hospitals.
When you got to the floor he's in you saw the members all waiting outside the emergency room.
"Y/n!" Emma called, ushering you.
"He's in there right now. He's in really bad shape, I'm gonna be honest with you. He could barely breathe on his own when we saw him. But thankfully, we got to him quickly so we were able to get him here right away. You okay?" Mikey filled you in, holding you by the shoulders. You looked back at him, nodding, not really showing much emotions because honestly you're lost right now. You don't know which emotion to feel.
He could barely breathe. That played in your mind nonstop, making you just want to drop down to the floor and weep. But you can't be a weeping mess when he's fighting for his life inside. You have to be strong, so you can punch him in the face when you get to him. How stupid to confront those men by himself.
You looked around the guys, some of them giving you worried looks in which you returned with a weak smile, nodding at them to assure them you're fine. You're fucking not. You're far from it.
Your eyes fell on Chifuyu who's sitting on the ground, head hanging low. He's the only one who didn't greet you, when usually he'd be the first one to do so. You walked to him and sat beside him on the floor.
"Are you okay?" You asked the blonde who's literally burning holes on the ground by how intense he's looking at it.
His features softened when he heard you. He slowly looked at you, giving you a defeated look. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I wasn't able to protect and help him. I should've been there with him. I didn't know." He said, almost choking as he fought the tears.
You brought your hand to his head, caressing it lightly. “Nobody knew, so don't beat yourself up for it. Let’s be strong and beat him together when he’s better, then let's share peyoung noodles by ourselves, how about that?” Chifuyu instantly lit up, nodding his head like an excited puppy who’s owner just came home.
You guys waited for hours, which felt like an eternity. Some guys were eventually dismissed by Mikey though they didn't want to leave, since you guys were cramming the waiting area.
You just sat there in silence, not being your usual loud and talkative self. I mean, how could you? That very stupid, hard headed guy who you love so much is in the emergency room in whatever fucked up state he's in.
"Who are the relatives of Keisuke Baji?" A doctor finally came out, looking around the room.
All of you stood up, looking at the doctor expectantly. The group made way for Mikey, Chifuyu, and you to step up to the doctor. "We all are." Mikey answered for all of you.
"Well" The doctor cleared his throat. "He was in such a bad condition when you admitted him, which is why it took quite some time to tend to him. There was a moment when he couldn't breath by himself and his pulse was too weak."
Every single one of you looked down, Emma and some men including Chifuyu started tearing up. There's really nothing you can hear but the doctor flipping through the pages on his board and their sniffling.
"H-how is he now?" You found the courage to speak up. Your voice never sounded so low, so weak, and fragile. Lord knows you're more than ready to have a breakdown right now. But you just have to find out this instant how he's doing, because one more moment of not knowing might just make your head explode.
"He's not in the best condition." The doctor announced. If your heart had already sunk earlier, now your heart feels as if it's just been shattered.
"He's got bruises all over his body as well as broken bones. He's probably not gonna be able to move or do very physical activities for quite some time. But he's a lucky guy. Though bruised up and fractured, we didn't see any serious problems that might put his health at risk, and that's because you were able to admit him here right away. He just needs to rest up and let his wounds and injuries heal."
There it is, the rainbow after the storm, the light at the end of the tunnel.
A breath all of you unknowingly had been holding was released all at once. The sad cries are now replaced with happy ones. You engulfed Chifuyu in a warm hug, keeping him up for his legs had given up on him. You eventually felt a tap on your shoulder, and when you looked back it was Mikey.
"Doctor said we can go check on him now. You should go." He smiled at you and you gave him back a smile, understanding what he's trying to say.
"Fuyu, wanna come with me?" You looked back at Chifuyu just as you were about to enter Baji's room.
"You should go" Chifuyu gave you a knowing smile. You smiled weakly at all of them and they returned it with nods of encouragement and reassurances.
You took a deep breath, trying to clear your mind before entering fully.
There he lies, whole body, from head to toe wrapped in gauze. If this were any other occasion that isn't serious you would have probably even joked that he looked like a mummy.
He instantly felt your presence so he whipped his head towards your direction, briefly forgetting that he's in no good state so he ended up wincing from the sore neck.
"Take it easy there" You made your way to him, voice filled with concern.
He just gave you one of his strong stares, almost like a glare, not saying a word.
"A-are you feeling much better--"
"I am, stop worrying." He said in an almost annoyed tone, turning his head to the side to avoid your gaze. Which confused you. Why's he acting this way? Is he in any position to even act this way?
"What's the problem, Baji?" You asked as calmly as you can because the last thing you want is to fight him in his current situation.
He clicked his tongue, confirming that he was annoyed. "Just leave me alone" He said in a very dismissive way that really made you stare at him in shock.
You didn't move. You don't even feel like you're breathing. You just looked at him trying to decipher the situation in front of you, trying to decipher him.
All the emotions you’ve been trying hard to control have just sprung free, not giving you any more chance to control them. You’re starting to get so overwhelmed that you didn't even realize that tears are falling down your eyes. You only realized it yourself when you heard your own sob escape your lips.
Baji looked at you in a flash when he heard that sound. A sound he's never heard from you before. When he looked at you, you were dropping to your knees as you sobbed uncontrollably.
This is the first time he's seeing you cry and he hates it already.
All the attitude, annoyance, and frustrations he has was suddenly washed away with panic. He tried propping himself up but he physically just can't. The sound of your sobs is so painful that it feels as though he's being stabbed in the heart.
"Y-Y/n, w-why-- I-I" He stuttered, unable to speak properly.
You looked up at him from the ground, vision cloudy because of the tears pooling on your eyes. "D-don't ask me to leave you alone, Baji. Not wh-when I felt like I was g-gonna die when I found out y-you're hurt." You sobbed harder. "I was w-worried sick, Baji! When I found out about you being beaten up there's nothing else I want to do but be where you are and save you. I wanted to leave everything earlier, it took everything in me to not storm out of the classroom to get to you. My fucking world COLLAPSED, I was scared as shit, just imagining you fucking beaten black and blue. Imagining you heaving for fucking air while you lay on the cold, hard concrete fucking broke my heart. I was shattered completely because there's a small voice in my head that says I can lose you. AND I DON'T WANT TO FUCKING LOSE YOU. You're the only one I've ever loved like this, so If I were to lose you how am I going to continue living? I don't want to be in a lifetime without you in it, because then I'd just be existing, not living." You looked into his eyes, tears still falling from yours. He's also got tears running down his cheeks as he laid flat on the bed, can't really do anything because his body wouldn't let him. All he could do was cry out as he felt the guilt creep up his chest, swallowing his heart whole.
No words were said nor exchanged for a while after that. The only sound to be heard in the room are both of your small sobs, sniffling, and the beeps from the monitors connected to him.
“Come here.” Was the first thing he said when he managed to calm down a bit.
You slowly looked up from the floor, wiping your tears as you blink the remaining tears on your eyes away. He just looked down at you waiting for you. You didn’t ask anymore, you just stood up and walked to the side of his bed, towering over him.
He patted his chest looking at you with guilt. You didn’t put up a fight and gently laid your head on his chest, carefully wrapping your arms on his torso. This is what you’ve been meaning to do ever since you laid eyes on him. This is what you’ve been wanting to feel, his warmth and his beating heart giving you the reassurance that he’s right here.
“I-I’m very sorry” He breathed out, voice shaky. “I shouldn’t have acted like that, it was very immature. I just hate worrying people and I saw it all over your face when you came in. But what I hate even more is seeing you cry, and knowing that it’s because of me broke me even more. I’m so sorry for worrying you, for making you feel helpless, and for making you cry. I love you.”
You just sobbed on his chest, nuzzling more onto them as he wrapped one of his arms around your torso and the other to your head. Feeling his gentle breathing and the beat of his heart under you instantly washed all your worries away.
“I love you too.” You said, lifting your head, kissing the hand he has on your head before resting your chin on his chest so you can look at him. “Don’t do that shit again, Baji. You’re in a gang for a reason, you have like a hundred other guys with you so you should’ve asked for their help or talked to them about it first. I know you got offended on behalf of Mikey but I'm pretty sure he didn’t want you ending up in this state for him. This is seriously a stupid stunt. You even made Fuyu cry, you jerk!” You fully stood up, hitting him lightly on the chest. Light but hard enough for it to hurt, because you want that shit to hurt.
“OWWW!” He yelled. You just rolled your eyes at him, but then brushed some hair out of his face.
“I’m serious, don’t do that again.” You said, looking deeply into his deep dark eyes. He nodded at you leaning on your hand that’s still brushing his hair. “Promise?”
He tugged on your hand and connected your lips. Your lips danced slowly yet passionately. Everything else that he can’t put into words you completely felt through the kiss. “Promise” He breathed out. You gave him a warm smile and stood up straight.
“You better keep that promise because if you don’t expect me to beat you up, and I know Chifuyu wouldn’t think twice helping me”
“You guys are mean” He pouted.
“And you’re stupid” You retorted. Before the conversation could turn into a full blown argument, Chifuyu’s head popped inside the room.
“BAJI-SANNNNN~ Nice to see you’re still intact, considering you’re a dumbass.” Chifuyu chirped, standing beside you making you laugh.
“So everyone’s really gonna slap it to me that I’m stupid huh?” Baji groaned.
“Oh for sure. You’ll probably even get an actual slap from Mikey, maybe even a kick, who knows?” Chifuyu shrugged while lifting a plastic bag. “Y/n, look what I got!” He said fishing out the content inside. You snickered when you figured out what it was and you gave Baji a devilish look.
✨PEYOUNG NOODLES✨
“You know how we plan to share one after we beat him up when he’s all good? Well since it’ll take time for us to beat him up, might as well eat now since he did exhaust us” Chifuyu grinned and you pat his head, giving him a proud parent look.
“Good call, Fuyu! Let’s eat!” You chirped.
“You guys aren’t seriously going to eat that in front of me right?” Baji gave you and Chifuyu a desperate look but you two just shrugged.
“ITADAKIMASU!!!” You and Chifuyu exclaimed, digging into your shared peyoung noodles.
“I’d rather be beaten up by those guys again than endure this torture. You spawns of the devil!” Baji groaned.
#tokyo revengers#tokyorev x reader#tokyo revenger imagines#keisuke baji#baji keisuke#tokyo revengers baji#tokyo revengers x y/n#tokyo rev x reader#tokyo revengers imagines#tokyo revenger x reader#tokrev baji#baji x reader#tokrev#toman baji#baji imagines#i freaking miss baji huhu i cant bye
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Showers in the Malfoy-Potter Household
Domestic, tooth-rotting, fluffy Married Drarry!!! Written for the prompt Fresh over at @drarrymicrofic. 2.3K words. Thank you to @curlyy-hair-dont-care for the thorough beta xx
I. That One Time with the Gloves…
“Bugger, I need to shower!” Harry shouts to the empty sitting room as he steps through the Floo, shoulders tense as he kicks off his muddy shoes, waving his wand to send them to the hamper and clearing the residual mess on his and Draco’s Brazilian Macchiato Pecan hardwood floors. On socked feet, Harry dashes up the stairs towards their ensuite, disrobing along the way as the charmed grandfather clock in the downstairs hallway strikes 14:00.
Any minute now, Draco will Floo back in from brunch with Narcissa and Lucius—the very brunch Harry said he couldn’t attend because he pulled Sunday rotation at the Ministry. In truth, he had actually signed up for THE GREATEST WEEKEND QUIDDITCH MATCH EVER!!! between the Department of Mysteries and the Department of Magical Law Enforcement. Harry had been surprised to learn that the DoM swots were a bunch of dirty playing wankers—their self-important swagger causing a stir on the ground and a gloriously brutal match in the air. Harry’s pretty sure he bruised his ribs when he struck the muddy ground at the end of the match. But even with his injury, Harry couldn’t help the wicked grin that crossed his face when Timmons, the DoM’s Seeker, watched in horror as Harry staggered to his feet, punching his Snitch-full fist triumphantly into the air.
The glory. The power. Harry feels like a warrior—he feels like a bloody beast!
The little white lie and a skipped brunch with the in-laws were worth it!
Once in the bathroom, Harry uses his wand to send his scattered muddy clothes to the hamper downstairs and turns the water on scorching hot. Stepping under the spray, his sore muscles relax. It’s absolutely blissful, and he can’t help the happy moans that escape him as the water sluices away the mud and sweat from his highly earned, brutal win. He chuckles darkly to himself. Those wankers from the DoM will be sucking on this one for months to come.
The shower curtain is pulled to the side, starling Harry so badly that he nearly slips, his head whipping around to face his smirking husband.
Draco sticks his head into the shower, making sure to avoid the stream, his eyes flashing. “Well, well, well. Look who’s getting so fresh and so clean after a hard day’s work.”
Harry huffs, covering his nipples with both hands as he says, scandalised, “Merlin! You scared the bloody hell out of me!”
“I’m sorry,” Draco says, sounding far from it. “I was so eager to see my husband after a lengthy morning away from him that all I could think about coming up the stairs was giving him the best shower blowie he’s ever had in his entire life…”
Harry grins. “Babe, I’ve missed you so much,” he says eagerly, stepping back under the spray. “Come on, get undressed and join me.” When Draco doesn’t move, Harry gestures inward. “Come on...come now…”
“Yeah, okay. Let me just…” Draco pulls from behind his back Harry’s dirty Quidditch gloves, dropping them into the shower as Harry gasps. The fresh dirt mingles with the water, swirling down the drain. Harry could’ve sworn he sent those gloves flying into the hamper.
Draco’s smile is shark-like, eager, and ready for blood. “Imagine my surprise when these came flying into my chest on my way up the stairs. I was so curious, I decided to have a quick search of the laundry room hamper, and lo and behold, I found all of your Quidditch gear, sweaty and smelling of fresh mud and grass, darling. Must’ve been one hell of a rotation this morning, huh?”
Harry holds up his hands. “I can explain—”
“Oh, really?”
“Er, yes…” Harry starts, running a hand through his soaked hair. “Babe, it’s those wankers from the DoM’s fault! They’re a bunch of posturing arseholes and someone had to put them in their place.”
Draco crosses his arms against his chest. “Ah, right. And that someone had to be you?”
Harry smiles sheepishly, shrugging. “Well…you know I’m the best Seeker in the Corps.”
Draco harrumphs, tilting his chin up and leaning against the wall next to the shower. “So, you know what this means, right?”
Harry bows his head. “Yeah…” he says sadly, shaking his head.
“What?”
Harry sighs. “No more Mimosa Sundays at Malfoy Manor?” he asks hopefully, peeking up at Draco through his wet, shaggy hair.
“Don’t be ridiculous. You know the mimosas at my parents' are bar none.”
“Yeah, yeah. I know…so, no blowie for me?”
“You’re damn right,” Draco says, yanking his head back and sharply pulling the shower curtain shut.
Harry grumbles to himself, turning back to the shower to rinse his hair. A minute or two passes before the shower curtain opens up again, a fully naked Draco stepping inside.
“But that doesn’t mean you can’t start grovelling the proper way: by sucking my cock,” Draco says with a smirk.
Harry laughs, wrapping his arms around Draco’s waist. “How did I land such a deeply compassionate, forgiving husband?”
“With that sinful mouth of yours, obviously,” Draco drawls, placing his hands on Harry’s shoulders to slowly push him down onto his knees.
II. That One Time Draco Was Trying to be Seductive...
Harry’s entering their bedroom, half an egg mayo sandwich in hand, when he notices Draco standing before the wardrobe mirror. “What are you doing?” he asks, pausing near the door.
Draco turns around, his arms spreading wide as he pops one narrow hip outward. He’s draped in an intricate floral-patterned gold bathrobe. “Do you like it? It’s new, darling. Just arrived from Italy. Rocco-inspired, heavy-weight close-knit silk lined with black satin…isn’t it gorgeous?” Draco purrs.
“Er…it’s quite something,” Harry says, biting into his sandwich.
“Neanderthal,” Draco tuts with a scowl before turning back to the mirror. He slides his hands reverently down the sides of his body as he tilts his head to the side. “It feels like fucking sex,” Draco whispers, his eyelids drooping.
Harry chokes on a bit of egg. Draco grins, ferally, as he faces Harry again.
“I have a surprise for you. Get undressed and meet me in the bathroom,” Draco says imperiously.
“Right now?” Harry asks around his sandwich, his eyebrows shooting up towards his hairline. “Why?”
Draco runs his hands down the front of his bathrobe, his eyes fluttering shut. “The things I’m going to do to you the moment you slip this robe off my body…”
That’s all Harry needs to hear as he sets his sandwich down on the nightstand to pull his shirt over his head, tossing it to the floor before levelling Draco with a heated stare and a wolfish grin. “Is that right? Well, go on, then. I’ll meet you there in a minute,” Harry says, now unbuttoning his trousers. When Draco heads towards the bathroom, Harry picks his sandwich back up and shoves the rest of it in his mouth before getting undressed.
When he’s fully naked, he opens the bathroom door, the entire room filled with fragrant steam so thick he can barely see Draco.
“Er?” Harry says, stepping into the bathroom. Draco stumbles forward, wand in hand.
“I think I may have overdone the steam a bit,” Draco says before promptly pitching forward. Harry misses him by just an inch because he can’t bloody see, and Draco lands face first on their tiled floor.
“I thought it would be sexy,” Draco whines from his position on the floor in Harry’s lap after Harry Rennervates him. There’s a red patch on his forehead and a trickle of blood coming out of his left nostril that Harry cleans up immediately.
“You were! You were so sexy,” Harry urges softly.
“But there was no arse groping. No kissing. No fucking. It was all so unpleasant!” Draco cries.
“Aw, babe. I’m sorry. I think we should take you to St Mungo’s just in case…”
Draco sighs, sitting up but swaying slightly. “Fine. Alright. But let’s not tell them the visit is due to my failed attempt at seduction.”
Harry stifles a laugh. “Of course not. C’mere,” he says, helping Draco to his feet. “You can seduce me after the Healer has ruled out a concussion, okay?”
“Okay. But only if you promise to take my new bathrobe off with your teeth later…”
III. That One Time with the Mongrel…
Draco’s writing out a pros and cons list to determine if they’ll be purchasing a cottage in Cornwall this summer when Harry appears in front of him, a black towel cradled against his chest that’s moving.
Draco quirks an eyebrow. “What in the fresh hell is wrong with that towel?”
Harry chuckles and pulls the towel back. Pressed against his chest is a tiny, muddy little Beagle.
“No,” Draco says firmly, setting his quill down.
“Wait! Don’t be so quick about it! C’mon, babe, she was all alone in the alley by the Ministry! No mum or dad in sight. I couldn’t leave her there!”
Draco closes his eyes against the utterly heartbroken look in Harry’s eyes and pinches the bridge of his nose. Of course, Harry would bring home an orphan, Draco had been preparing himself for this day since they married four years ago, only, he thought said orphan would be a wee babe, not a filthy mongrel. He exhales, nods, and opens his eyes, hand dropping away from his face. “Okay. Well. I refuse to have this mongrel in our house looking and smelling the way it does.”
Harry’s face lights up as if Draco has promised him the moon, and the stars, and all the love in his entire being. All over again.
“So, can we keep her?” Harry asks excitedly.
“Yes, Harry. We can keep her.”
Harry surges forward to press a kiss against Draco’s mouth, taking Draco off guard but aiming perfectly, nonetheless. Draco can’t help the laugh that bubbles up his throat as Harry begins to litter kisses all over his face, the mongrel caught between them. “You’re going to love her, I promise. Just look at her! She’s bloody adorable, isn’t she?” Harry says, holding the beast out to Draco.
Draco’s nose scrunches up as the dark-eyed creature stares up at him. She’s so small she could fit in Draco’s cupped hands, but her smell is atrocious. “Sure…” Draco says slowly, leaning away.
Harry hums happily. “I think we should name her—”
“—Beasty,” Draco interrupts, gaze flickering up to Harry. Harry rolls his eyes.
“No, silly! We should name her Pepper. Because she sorta smells like black pepper.”
Draco wants to suggest to Harry that perhaps they need to visit St Mungo’s to get his nose examined, because the last time Draco checked, black pepper smelled absolutely nothing like faeces. But he refrains, the joyous look on Harry’s face well worth going along with the madness.
“Sure, darling, whatever you want. Pepper it is. But she’s going to need a bath.”
Harry nods. “Right, yes, let’s take her upstairs to our bathroom.”
Draco smiles tightly. “Ah, no. I just had that tub put in. I don’t want this mong—Pepper staining the porcelain.”
“Oh, right, right. Okay, well, we can bathe her in the tub down here.”
Draco links his fingers together over his list. “Yes, excellent idea. So,” he starts, eyeing the now droopy-eyed, stinky monster. “Should we use a Petrificus Totalus or—?”
“DRACO!” Harry gasps, looking completely horrified. “We can’t put Pepper in a full body bind, are you insane? She’s a puppy!”
Draco frowns, his eyebrows knitting together. “She’s covered in grime and you expect me to manoeuvre this beast into the tub with its full cooperation?”
Harry glares at him. “She’s the sweetest thing, and I’m sure we won’t have any problems getting her into the bath, okay? Just follow my lead.”
Draco shrugs. Harry hasn’t led him astray yet.
When they finally enter the downstairs bathroom, tub now full of water at the perfect temperature and a mild soap, Draco suddenly gets an armful of Pepper as Harry begins to shed his jacket and jumper.
Draco stares down at her.
She is quite cute, with her large, bulbous black eyes, long, floppy ears, and wee-frowny mouth. Draco believes he can actually come to love this gross little beasty.
“Let’s get you all fresh and clean, sweetie,” Harry says, taking her back from Draco to place her in the water.
That’s when all hell breaks loose.
As Harry struggles to keep a hold on her, Pepper lifts her paws away from the water as if it’s fire, wild yelps escaping her as she struggles out of Harry’s grasp, dropping into the water first before lunging straight at Draco.
Draco catches her, her tiny little body soaking through his very nice, very clean jumper.
“Fucking fuck, fuck…” Draco mutters, staring down at Pepper, warmth exploding in his chest. She’s shivering against him and the anger and shock immediately leave his body as he cradles her, a defeated groan escaping him as a section of his heart unlocks and opens up to this little beasty.
Harry laughs. “Merlin, you are just so bloody adorable,” he says.
Draco scoffs, even as he stares down fondly at her, rocking her in his arms. “She’s a menace, that’s what she is.”
“No…I mean you,” Harry says, his eyes twinkling behind his glasses, cheeks dimpled. Draco can feel the heat of a blush spilling across his cheeks as Harry leans forward to kiss him. When they part, Harry glances down at Pepper before meeting Draco’s eyes.
“We’re building our little family,” Harry says proudly.
Draco opens his mouth to say something mocking, but can’t, not with the ball of emotion that’s suddenly lodged in his throat. Instead, he blinks several times, glancing down at Pepper who’s staring up at him with her large eyes, tail wagging.
“Oh,” Draco says softly. “I suppose we are.” He sniffs. “I think it’s best if we get Beasty Pepper to the vet instead, maybe they can help us give her a proper bath. Shall we?”
Draco smiles as Harry drapes an arm around his shoulders. “Yes, let’s do it, babe,” Harry responds tenderly.
#drarrymicrofic#Drarry Microfic#Drarry fic#Harry Potter#Draco Malfoy#Drarry#Drarry Squad#short fic#fluff#so much fluff#established relationship#harry x draco#married drarry#All fluff and zero pain#which I'm finna embrace as my new normal#hahahaha
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HOHO💖THANK YOU 💘 I was thinking one very Angst with Gojo, like.. He realizes he loves his best friend, but when he confesses they heavily reject him saying they could never trust him that way due to his womanizer self(?) and bc they love nanami,, like,, when they see him they're like 🎇💘MMHH YES, I feel awful but I love seeing gojo in pain for somewhat reason
Im so sorry😂🙏 if you don't want to write this, it's okay👌😌 thank you dear💖
too late
a/n: my past like 4 gojo asks have all been about him being a whore,,, y’all love to slander this man and see him in pain (me too)
synopsis: gojo loves you, you love nanami, things are messy
t/w: angst, gojo is very sad
w/c: 1.4k
you’ve been gojo satoru’s best friend for as long as you can remember — two brainless jujutsu sorcerers who could never take anything seriously. the two of you together were simultaneously the biggest annoyance and also quite a force to be reckoned with. your abilities were no where near those of satoru, but you complimented him perfectly and no one stood a chance if the two of you were together — and you were always together.
in fact you were together right now, grabbing some food after effortlessly taking out some curses a few cities over. satoru enjoyed the sweeter things in life, downing a package of powdered-coated dough balls while you stuck to your savory bowl of spicy rice cakes. this was tradition for the two of you, sitting on a random bench somewhere in a random city munching on snacks and debriefing on the mission you’d just completed.
you loved it, and you loved satoru — like a brother, like a best friend, like a favorite teammate. you loved satoru but not in the way he loved you.
it was a recent realization, that he loved you in a romantic kind of way. he’d always just seen you as his best friend, but recently your eyes have sparkled a little more, your skin glowed a little brighter, and your voice sounded a little smoother when it flowed into his ears. it was right now, while he watched your sauce-covered lips suck down another rice cake, that he realized he wanted nothing more than to kiss you — right here and right in front of everyone.
the only problem was, he had quite the history of being a womanizer. satoru went through women as if they were a one-time-use disposable product, and you were very aware of this. but none of those women were you, and he promised himself that he’d give you everything you deserved when he finally confessed.
“can i have one?” you pointed to his near empty package of sweets and shook him out of his thoughts.
satoru wasn’t much for sharing, especially his desserts, but you were an exception. he plucked out a powdery ball (one that he knew was your favorite flavor) and popped it into your mouth. him hand-feeding you should have been weird, but you’ve been friends for so long that you didn’t think twice about it. you bit the sticky dough down between your teeth, a cheesy smile stretching across your face when you noticed he got your flavor right.
“th-aanks,” you mumbled, mouth stuffed full of sugary confection.
in the midst of your chewing, you felt a napkin swipe across your mouth to remove the excess powdered sugar. you eyed satoru suspiciously, starting to catch on to how overly-touchy he was being today. but he just shrugged, making snarky comments about how messy of an eater you were.
it wasn’t until the two of you finished your snacks and were walking through the city that you finally questioned him. he’d wrapped his arm through yours, pulling you close so you were walking right next to his side — his weirdly intimate actions today were starting to stack up.
“what are you doing?” you peered up at him, giving your arm a small yank as you attempted (and failed) to put some space between the two of you.
“that guy over there was checking you out,” he shamelessly pointed to a dark-haired man further up the street, his voice defensive.
“okay, and? that bothers you-?” you yanked again, finally pulling your arm free of his embrace.
“no, but he looks like a weirdo, you deserve someone better than that,” he insisted, an evil grin on his face as he turned his pointer finger so it was facing himself.
“like me!”
“oh, like nanami”
your voices came out at the exact same time, but the content of your words could not have been more different.
“nanami!?”
“you!?”
the two of you froze in the middle of the street, faces covered in equal amounts of shock and confusion. satoru had finally confessed his feelings to, and you’d just accidentally and unintentionally shut him down with one word — nanami.
“nanami?” he repeated again, an edge to his voice as he tried to protect his ego and mask his jealousy.
“yeah, i- uh, i planned to tell you soon that we’ve been seeing each other recently. i had no idea that you-” you scrambled to explain the situation, trying not to let the hurt on your friend’s face get to you, “you’re with other women all the time satoru, how was i supposed to know?”
he winced at the unintentional insult, his history with women weighing heavy on his shoulders as he realized it was a prominent factor in your rejection.
“ah - it’s fine! nanami beat me to it i guess. i’m happy for you guys,” he attempted a genuine smile, and anyone else may have been fooled by it too, but you knew him better than to fall for his shitty façade.
you noticed the tiniest twitch of his eyebrow, and the smallest quiver of his lip as he continued to hide and protect his true feelings. it broke your heart in half, having to watch him put on a show like this.
“i’m sorry,” you let the apology spill from your lips a few times, but he was very quick to remind you that none of this was your fault.
“we’ll still be friends, right? i don’t know what i’d do without you,” you gave him a somber look, imagining a future without him by your side.
satoru and nanami were good friends as well, and you’d never forgive yourself if this tore their friendship apart.
“of course,” he gave you a cheeky smile and then continued walking down the street with a quick wave of his hand, instructing you to follow him.
you jogged a couple steps to catch up to him, and he immediately started making jokes about a weird-looking man who was selling street food to your left. in a matter of seconds he was back to his typical self — so much so that it seemed as if your conversation had never happened.
and that's exactly how satoru tried to imagine his life — as if that conversation had never occurred. he knew how important he was to you, but he also saw the way you looked an nanami with stars in your eyes. he knew that you needed them both, and so he stayed and watched you fall in love with someone who wasn’t him.
whenever you asked, he told you that it had been a weird one-time thing and that he didn’t feel that way towards you anymore. he’d listen to your stories about the ex-business man and force smiles and laughter to make you happy. because that was all he ever wanted, for you to be happy, and if that meant you had to be with someone else, so be it.
you and satoru were one in the same, so incredibly alike that maybe you would never have worked out anyway. you were raging with energy, energy that satoru only fueled stronger — where as nanami was gentle, peaceful, the opposite of you and your silver-haired counterpart. nanami cooled you down and and kept you centered, and that was what you needed, but it was something satoru would never have been able to give you.
so when years had gone by and nanami asked him to be the best man at your wedding, he was crippled. he knew how important it was to you but he could hardly stand the thought of watching you vow yourself to the blonde-man. but despite his feelings, he didn’t even hesitate to say yes. you’d be so disappointed if he hadn’t.
and so he threw on his mask one last time, standing tall in a sleek, black suit as he watch you spill your feelings to nanami in a beautiful vow. you looked perfect, so stunning, and it tore him up that he wasn’t the one standing across from you.
but he laughed and smiled all night, because that’s who he was. gojo satoru was always expected to be the life the party, and it was a heavy burden to carry. he was so tired of keeping up an act for you and for everyone else; all he wanted was to bury his head into your neck and rest. but he’d never have that, he’d never have you, and tonight made it official.
#jujutsukaisen#jujutsu kaisen angst#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen imagines#jujutsu kaisen drabble#jjk oneshot#jjk gojo#jjk angst#jjk imagines#jjk x reader#gojo satoru#gojo x reader#gojo satoru x reader#gojo imagine#gojo angst#gojo satoru angst#gojo satoru imagine
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Never alone
Pairing: Jake x MC
Words: 4,1 k
Summary: Someone couldn’t handle herself while texting Jake and there is no turning back.
Warnings: If sex scenes aren’t your thing, this fic isn’t for you. 🔥
My native language isn't english, so forgive me the possible grammar errors.
Never alone
Jake: Can you focus on what we are doing, please?
You read the message and something large clogged your throat. Is it possible that he knew what you were doing?
MC: I am focused. I just got distracted for a second, sorry about that.
Jake: Good. So, are you on board for this? It isn’t too hard task for you?
Oh yes, it is, and you know it. How can I possible focus on anything while discussing with you? It was so strange feeling, since you had never seen his face, but you imagined him as tall, with dark hair and well-built. You had dreamt about him for weeks now, even while you were awake. It has almost become an obsession to you, and you checked your phone probably a hundred times a day, just to see those sweet three words… Jake is online.
MC: So, what is exactly you want me to do?
You saw the pencil mark as a sign that he was writing and apparently deleting the written message few times. There was this tingling feeling in your toes and you felt slightly nauseous. You were longing for a message, where he would tell you to take off your shirt and give you a new instruction. You knew that he could told you to do anything, and you would oblige easily without a doubt. Your nipples went hard even for that thought and you had this longing sensation, like an ache, between your legs, demanding and pulsating. The top you were wearing was a long gone and you laid on your back on the sofa and the only light in the room was the light coming from your phone. Your hands wandered through your body with light brushes, occasionally rubbing your breasts, and you closed your eyes. You imaged that those hands weren’t yours, but Jake’s. You drew circles with your fingers at the surface of your skin, ending up on the waist band of your panties. Slowly, you touched yourself in a trembling hand, and small moan escaped through your lips, waking you up from this daydream and the imaginary picture of Jake in your mind vanished. Frustrated, you took your hand away and put the shirt back on. But he would never do that, and you just knew it. You had confessed that you liked him, and he said that he liked you too. The warming feel with those words was overwhelming and you had returned them many times, just to remind yourself that he had feelings for you too. But I like you too, is such a vague impression after all and could be just a compliment too. How could this ever work since you didn’t even know where he was?
Jake: I don’t want you to do anything what compromises your safety. You know that, right?
Jake: So, forget all your plans going there loudly with cavalry. Since all you have, is me, and I hardly am “the cavalry”.
But you are all I need and all I want, you wanted to respond. But something held you back, and you were afraid that Jake would go offline. You tucked a lost strand of hair back to behind your ear and sighted. Why, why on earth this was so fucking hard. And for god’s sake, you two were just texting and you couldn’t contain yourself. You imagined meeting Jake in person, but how embarrassed you would feel, since you could not even say those things via text, how could you ever say them aloud?
MC: I do know that. I will be discreet, no one will see me.
Jake: Be careful. We will talk again after your mission.
You had feeling that your discussion was coming to an end and the tears started blurring your sight. You just wanted to be close to him, even though it was in opposite ends of two screens between you two. You had been in this situation many times before, and each time it felt harder. It was so utterly crushing to lose contact now and you typed so quickly that you didn’t have time to even think about what you should say to him. Knowing that you were alone the next few weeks.
MC: Don’t go. Just don’t leave me now. I miss you so much. I love you. Don’t go.
When you saw your own words flashing through the screen and realized that you had lost your self-discipline, those tears that you had tried to not let loose, came like spring water, draining your cheeks. You didn’t want to look what Jake replied (or did he even reply?) and you felt so powerless and weak, and those feelings had been inside you for a very long time suppressed. You threw your phone back at the sofa and paced around your living room, cursing under your breath. You fucking idiot, why would you say that? He doesn’t love you back, you stupid girl. If he would, he would have come and get you already.
You heard that you got messages, multiple messages, but you didn’t want to see them. Jake was probably telling her now that they two together were too dangerous and he was wanted by the government… But you didn’t care. If he just would have asked, you would give up your life as you know it without a hesitation. You could move and go no-contact with your friends and family, you would give up your job, that you loved. Because you loved him more.
You loved him.
And this was the thought last on your mind when you cried yourself to sleep.
****
You had no idea what time it was, but it was night since it was so dark that you couldn’t see anything. The silence was overwhelming and pressuring, and you laid without moving on your bed covers, and suddenly you just knew, that you were not alone. The only noise in you could hear was your own breathing and you stopped it for a second; but you couldn’t hear anything. You opened your eyes carefully and looked your apartment. Since you lived in a studio, you could see the whole room from your bed. Your heart was pounding so loud and fast that you were afraid it would escape through your ribcage any second now.
You looked thoroughly the room and you couldn’t see anyone or anything moving. Slowly you pulled out from your bed and turned the light on. There was no one in the room. You searched your apartment cautiously, but there was nothing out of the ordinary to be seen. Just when you were going back to bed, you noticed that the window in the separate kitchen was open. Had you forgot to close it? You looked from your window to the yard, but there was nothing. You shut the window second time that night and stared at the darkness, but still, there was nothing to be seen. Remembering last nights text messages made you frown, but you would deal it in the morning. You yawned and turned around.
Just when you thought you couldn’t handle your heart anymore, it stopped and felt ice-cold. There was this dark figure in the corner, just a few footsteps from you. You saw the dark figure was a man with a hood and it was covering his face, so you couldn’t see who he was. But you didn’t need the to see anything more, because you knew who was standing in your home instantly. It just wasn’t possible...
“Jake?” you whispered in utter disbelief. This must be a dream. You pinched yourself from your thigh so forcefully, that it hurt like a hell.
The hooded figure seemed to be alarmed and hesitant, but he didn’t move or say anything.
“Jake? Is it really you?” you asked softly, and the man slowly nodded. The movement of his head was so small, that you weren’t sure if you were seeing correctly. You had no idea what to say anymore, this situation had surprised you fully. You had had these dreams, but now when he was really here, you were so lost on what to do.
“Has something happened?” you asked, voice trembling. Your knees felt that they were going to betray you any moment now. Suddenly the man made a noise, and it took a while when you understood, that he was actually laughing. The laugh didn’t sound joyful, it was more a bitter tone.
“Apparently I have gone mad”, he said in a raspy voice. “I swore that I would protect you and here I am, putting you a more danger that you ever have been.”
You shifted the weight of you to another foot, trying to understand what Jake had just said.
“What do you mean by that? How am I in danger?”
“What else this could be? I am wanted by all kind of people and none of them are on the good side” Jake spat angrily, and you felt his eyes piercing you, even though you couldn’t see his eyes. You suddenly came very, very aware that you didn’t have any trousers on, just the panties. Your hands moved to cover yourself but at the same time, you had dreaded this moment since you ever had chatted with him in the first place. But why was he so angry?
“Could I see your face?” you asked, and you didn’t recognize your voice anymore. Since when you had sounded like that? Maybe your wildest dreams were happening, and you couldn’t believe it.
“No.” His voice was harsh and cold. You felt instant disappointment roaming thorough your body, crushing your hopes.
“But why? You can see mine.”
“Let’s not make this any more complicated than it is”, he frowned and took a step back, adding more shadows in his figure.
“Why are you here then?” The now unrecognizable voice was mad. You felt anger rising somewhere inside of you, making room for itself pushing all the hopeful thoughts aside. “Why the fuck are you in my home in the middle of the night if I can’t even see you?”
Overwhelmed, you turned around and felt so frustrated. Jake was in your home; you finally had met him, and he forbid you to even look at him. This was nothing like you had imagined, there was nothing romantic in this situation.
“I needed to see you”, you heard him answer and waited more. His voice was not so harsh anymore, but maybe… desperate? You peeked him with corner of your eye. He hadn’t move from his spot.
“Why would you say those things? Why didn’t you answer my messages anymore?” he asked and now he’s voice was definitely trembling. You thought that he was longing something and didn’t know if you could give it to him. You turned back to him and took a step closer to him. You slowly reached your hand towards him, but he didn’t budge. For a second you remembered your semi-nakedness but who the fuck cares. This was more important than a missing pair of jeans.
“Jake”, you said lightly and even saying his name aloud gave you a light blush. Get yourself together, you command yourself. “Are you that daft?” you burst, and this was clearly not the answer Jake had expected since you heard offended huff from the darkness.
“I was so embarrassed with my own words, who betrayed me coming out like that, because I had agreed with myself that I would not vocalize my feelings towards you. But I do love you which is absolutely crazy and how on earth I could love something I haven’t never seen or heard before? That would freak out anyone, let alone you, who is forced to work with me to find his sister” you ranted, now looking on anything else except him.
“I don’t expect you to love me back, and I am so sorry for distracting our search towards Hannah. I won’t do it again, I promise. We can never talk about this incident again.” You feel those stupid tears again and flickered your eyes. Oh no, don’t cry NOW!
Everyone who has ever heard silence, know how disturbing it can be. The silence what landed between you and Jake was so thick and full of fear and anxiousness and you waited -, no, - you feared his response. It felt like a small eternity when he finally responded.
“MC…” he said, and that was all he said. Nothing else. You waited but there was nothing more. Feeling so defeated and humiliated, you just wanted to get away from him and started walking out of the kitchen.
But he finally grabbed your hand and pulled you in to the shadows with him. Your confused brain could only register his musky smell and his other hand on your lower back when he pulled you closer. His lips carefully brushed yours and your head felt like exploding. Adrenaline flushed through your veins so fast that it made you feel dizzy, and you grasped his hoodie to stay balanced. You leaned towards him and felt his breath on your face, and you opened your lips, welcoming his.
You had never been kissed like that and it had never felt so good. His lips were demanding, and his grip tightened on your hand; your hands were in his hair, trying to get him closer. You both gasped air between the kisses and his hand moved from your back to your bottom, and you tangled your leg behind his. He let go of your hand and lifted you to his lap and turned you two around landing you on the counter top and you could hear cutlery dropping on the floor. Your brains screamed with joy and happiness, wishing this moment could continue forever. There was only you and Jake in this world, and nothing couldn’t stop you two, you wouldn’t care if the Man Without a Face would have entered the room.
He moved his lips from your mouth to your neck and every kiss he made, left you with a burning sensation and you could not do anything else than moan. You could feel his lips changing from gently kisses to more intense and rougher around your neck and he nibbled behind your earlobe quite forcefully.
“Jake…” you moaned again with pleasure and sent your hands exploring his body, you just wanted to have all of him.
“This is incredibly stupid” you heard him say somewhere lower and you can’t help but giggle a bit. “Why does it feel so good then?” you asked, and he answered by cupping your breast and squeezing it gently and sucked your earlobe at the same time. You could see that the darkness had lifted since moon was shining from the window, lighting the room. He had a dark hair, as you had imagined, and it seemed that other of your predictions had done well too. Jake let go of your ear and looked at you and you could see his blue eyes were full of lust and something else… He stroked your cheek with his thumb, and you pulled him closer between your legs with your feet.
“You are so fucking beautiful, MC”, he said in a raspy voice, still looking at you. “But I did actually know that already. I just needed to see you with my own eyes”. I presumed that he meant that he had seen my social media profiles, and probably something else, that I wasn’t aware of, since he was a hacker.
“I presume that I am not alone with my feelings?” you asked and did not know, what made you so courageous. You two looked each other and time had stopped. Still caressing your cheek, Jake sighed.
“I am not good with expressing emotions. And still, this is incredibly stupid.”
Now was your turn feel offended. How could this burning feeling inside of you be stupid? And why couldn’t he just admit that they were more than pen pals from mystery series of Duskwood? Maybe he didn’t care you as much as you liked to think.
“Yeah, maybe you are right”, you said in a hurt tone and lowered your gaze. “If I am the only one here with feelings, this is going to be a torture for me if we continue.” You let your hands rest on your lap.
“Who’s the daft now?” Jake asked amused and lifted up your chin, forcing you to look at him. “I didn’t come all the way here to tell you I didn’t love you.”
“What are you telling me then?” You didn’t dare to hope for any answer. Jake kissed you again, but you broke the kiss soon (even though it was incredibly hard) and looked him desperate.
“Jake… Please”, you whispered.
He looked you and looked defeated.
“If I say it, there’s no turning back. I feel like I’m trapping you with me, and trust me, it isn’t comfortable place to be in life at this moment.”
“I want to be trapped with you with every cell of my body” you assured him quickly. And you meant every word you said, because this, right here, was where you wanted to be. With Jake.
“I…” he started, and you stopped breathing. You had longed for this moment ages and could not believe that this was happening. Your whole body waited for he to continue his sentence.
“I never want to be separated from you” he whispered. “You are amazing and beautiful, and still so frustrating and stubborn. I came here to tell you that we are better off just friends for both of our protection, but now I am with you and you are just… you! You just look at me and I forget everything I was supposed to say and all I want to do is pull you closer and never let go.”
You exhaled and noticed that he was shaking, and you were surprised to see that you were too. “Well then don’t let go”, you whispered back.
He grabbed your waist and shift you closer to him and kissed you passionately, your tongue met his. He nibbled your lower lip, and his hands were wandering again through your body. You wanted to be touched everywhere by him and leaned little bit back so there was room for his hands. He took eagerly your given chance and moved his hands under your shirt. You felt dizzy again and didn’t even notice that you were moaning again when his lips found a way to your cleavage. He looked up as a gesture making sure that this was okay to you.
“Don't you dare to stop”, you gasped.
He didn’t need more confirmation and pulled your shirt up, revealing your upper body. He took a moment to look at you properly and you felt something getting harder inside of his trousers. Your thoughts moved to the forward where he would finally enter you and the pulsating, aching feeling was back. Jake took your nipple between his lips and sucked it gently and for a moment you were so sure, that you would pass out for the pleasure. He caressed you with his hands and mouth, moving the hands slowly to the waistband of your panties. You tried to take of his shirt, but he gently pushed your hands off back to the counter top as he focused on you; you had no choice than enjoy the ride.
His fingers felt warm when he finally touched you under the panties. You knew that you were soaking wet, but when he started rubbing your clit, you could see the star constellations. Your moans weren’t subtle anymore, and with each noise you made, he seemed to get more fuel on his actions. Jake pulled your panties off easily, revealing you completely. He took he’s moment again to admire you and before you knew, he was continuing rubbing your clit with his thumb and the other hands fingers were inside you, fastening the pace with every moan you let slip. You could feel his tongue on your nipple again and you grabbed his hair. All you felt was pleasure, you had never felt so good in your life; all your emotions from last month while texting Jake and developing one-sided feelings towards him came to final conclusion – you weren’t alone in this after all, and this made you so utterly happy. Your vision started to blur, and you lost your sense of everything else except the overwhelming feeling of relieve when you orgasmed. When you finally came back to your senses, you felt Jake gently lightening his pressure on you and you breathed heavily, trying to get some air. Your smile was contagious, and Jake grinned while watching you.
“What?”
“Like I said”, he murmured, “you are amazing.”
You pulled him for a kiss which deepened shortly. At the same time, your hands found his belt and you started undressing him with his help. When you got rid of his shirt, you saw scars on his torso, and you looked them in confusion.
“Another time, okay?” Jake asked and you nodded and same time you felt butterflies in the bottom of your stomach. Another time…
He opened his belt and lowered his trousers revealing black underwear with a promising bulge in the groin, and you could not wait to get rid of these barriers anymore, Jake was laughing for your enthusiasm and this time, the laugh sounded like it should be; light, happy and a bit teasing.
“I cannot wait you to be inside of me” you confessed, and he did as you told. You could feel him in your entrance, dipping in just the tip. Your whole body was ready, and your mind was yelling you all kind of naughty words and Jake looked you just like he could hear them. He kissed you playfully and you just couldn’t take it anymore.
“Jake”, you moaned, “you are driving me crazy.”
“Now you know how I feel”, he said and took a good grip from your hair, pulling your head back and forced his lips on yours. You felt him entering inside of you and you moaned so hard, that it was a more of a shout than a moan. The thrusts went harder as he listened you carefully first, and all you could do was to say “yes”.
The sex wasn’t like you had imagined, but it was better. It wasn’t gentle and loving, it was rough and needy, and you felt both of you were pouring out all of those long-suppressed feelings and dreams of you two, the desperation with the dangers and the times you two tried to forget each other’s as it was just mad to fell in love with stranger. But here you two were, having sex in your kitchen, against all the odds.
You grabbed the cupboards above you trying to hold your position as Jake pounded in you and you kept drifting in the back of the counter top. Jake suddenly pulled you down from the surface, turned and bent you over, and entered you again, going in deeper with every thrust. You could hear his breathing tightening up and getting faster, as well yours. He grabbed your hair again, which you didn’t know that you liked before, but oh boy, how it made things better. You felt the orgasm coming again and you couldn’t help but scream and arch your back with incoming wave of pleasure. You didn’t hear yourself, but you were screaming Jake’s name, and that was the final straw for him, as he came inside of you.
****
You sat on Jake's lap and laid your head to his chest, as your fingers draw circles on his chest. He kissed you on your forehead and played with your hair.
“Jake?” you asked. “What happens now?”
He looked you in deep with his thoughts and you were wondering, would you even want to hear answer to your question.
“Well. This definitely complicates things”, he said finally.
“You can’t go offline now”, you teased him, trying to lighten the mood. “Can we solve this together?”
“So, we’re together now?” he asked with one of his eyebrows up and you bump your fist in his chest lightly. “That is not how to respond to a lady who has just had sex with you”.
“That is correct”, he frowned. “I’m sorry.”
“Do you have any objections at the topic of us being together?” you asked, and he could hear the worry in your voice.
“Well, I said it before. There’s no turning back now”, Jake gazed you intensely, caressing your cheekbones, “You’re stuck with me now.”
Knowing how hard it was to him say these things aloud, you took this as a victory and snuggled to get better position on his lap. He did love you as much you love him, and both of you know that.
“Just where I want to be. With you. No matter what.”
#duskwood#everbyte studios#duskwood jake#jake x mc#duskwood jake x mc#duskwood fanfiction#duskwood smut#duskwood jake x player#jake x player
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