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#36 DAYS ... LAST I SAW ....
duodusk · 1 year
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making a post that will shock the world ... i miss wilbur
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bluedestinybluebird · 9 months
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#i think this might be a coffee day for me#coffee or melissa. not sure#the book is 50 this year#the movie 36 this week (or so)#and i'm almost ready to wrap up the conference season#last week i: took care of a group of 60 people (in one bus) and managed feeding over 90. slept not much (which is not an achievement per se#but still important in context of all the daily stuff and evening parties#dealt with 2 annoying people (incl. 1 sexist) and we all made it#came up with an idea of solving (at least locally and on a small scale) an issue of gender inequality and how to deal with harassment#bc maybe students will be able to distribute it further#spent the week managing organising and saved one speaker's flight (and several people's commute)#deejayed (indirectly) and danced and sang. and touched a guitar after a year-long break. i missed playing it so much!#made several new connections and possibly friends#hm. and stopped two adult men from brawling (which was possible) and avoided additional fees. and saw off a group after 3h of sleep#saw a hare and a fox#walked and climbed and almost run#made mistakes and fixed them?#and managed with all these feelings of being overwhelmed#oh. and i muttered the few French words i still know#and while my anxiety is currently high (wow. it hadn't been for so long? or was i just numb?) and I'm tired#i kind of see the light and feel much more capable of dealing with shit#even though currently I'm panicking bc anxiety#but hey. i just need to buy a ticket for tomorrow's flight and I'm off#and it's like the smallest thing of it all#mighty me#now let's tackle the talk and deal with the day#...after i'll be a bit more alive than just slightly#okay organizing a seminar won't solve the issue but it could help at least a bit#and we need to do sth to make it better#caring too much.jpg
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wandaspup · 1 month
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Sinners Part Two
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Summary: In a small town, you try living up to your mother’s expectations while encountering Wanda Maximoff, a mysterious woman and a childhood friend of your mothers. It leaves you questioning her intentions and your beliefs.
Parings: Wanda x Fem R
Warnings: None besides Wanda testing the waters with you (will be added as I update! ♥️ Happy reading)
Author notes: You are 19 years old while Wanda is 36. Story will be updated every two weeks! Two more chapters left (: Thank you everyone for reading this.
Please read the first chapter if you come across this one first for new readers!
You sauntered downstairs, the clacks of pans getting louder as you descend further into the kitchen. Your mother focused on getting the food on the table. She pointed towards the counter. “Set the silverware and make sure they’re properly placed this time.” 
Today Wanda was coming over. After you got home from Church, she was all you can think about from yesterday. You can still remember the way her expressions shifted when she looked at you, as those eyes followed you around before or so you kept thinking. Even when you sleep, you can still feel her presence lingering in the corner of your room. You know she isn’t there, but glimpses of her face in your dreams felt so real. 
The first time you dream about her, the encounter of déjà vu washes over you. Maybe you were going insane and thinking of another woman around town. 
You placed the silverware carefully, aligning each one just as your mother taught you. Hopefully she won’t throw a tantrum over a spoon placed an inch to the left. She seemed too focused on what she was doing and you’ve never seen your mother this tense or excited. She never mentioned Wanda, but she never mentioned anything about her life back then. She told you It’s a waste of time to babble on about such things. 
The doorbell echoes and you pause, momentarily staring at the silverware in your hand before carefully placing them aside and making your way to the front. You breathe in and out one last time for a good measure and gripped the handle and twisted. The door swings open, your eyes widen in surprise, and it takes you a moment to register Wanda standing before you. She wears a flaxen dress, its fabric rippling in the light breeze and delicately skimming against the sides of her thighs. Her dress reached halfway, giving you a good glimpse at her sun-kissed legs, glistening. A yellow flower nestled in her hair on the left side. She beams and snaps her fingers.
You mentally berated yourself and offered a swift apology. 
Wanda chuckled, her laughter , crossing her arms in front of her. Her smirk widened, and she glanced past you, nodding towards the entrance. “Well, darling, are you planning to keep me waiting out here all day?”
As you stepped aside, she gave you that look, the exact same one back outside the church and suddenly your heart pounded quicker. An aromatic honey apple scent overwhelmed as she passed, your head suddenly heavy as you closed the door and led her to the kitchen. Food was set evenly in the middle of the table, your father already took a seat with your mother. 
“Wonderful to see you again my dear friend.” She gestured at the seat across, and you noticed the only chair left was right next to her’s. Debating on moving it to the other side of the table, you figured your mother would scold you for being rude.
“Well I appreciate you having me over. It’s been awhile since we last saw each other.” 
From there It was nothing but short stories and awkward laughters between all of them. You kept your eyes on your plate, shuffling your food inside your mouth praying this dinner will end soon and you can lock yourself in your room. Once in a while, you’d sneak a glance whenever you heard Wanda speak or laugh at something your father said. Unbeknownst, Wanda knew your cute tactics of being sneaky without batting an eyelash. You’d do it again when she took a sip of wine, her lipstick staining the glass. 
Wanda’s chair screeched unexpectedly, apologizing when her fork slipped out of her hand and clattered to the ground. When she reached for it, she used your thigh for support, her perfectly manicured fingers wrapped around with a light grasp, sending a shiver down your spine. "I think I need a new fork," she all but said, her hands still resting in the same place. "Apologies, darlin', hope you didn't mind me using you." Wanda grinned and motioned her hand back and forth before pulling away, leaving a lingering warmth on your thigh.
The weight of her hand was missed for some odd reason you were unable to comprehend. Usually, the gentle pats from an elderly woman at the bread store were just a friendly gesture, never thinking much of it. However, her touch stirred an entirely different sensation. 
One you were sure you’d be praying on your knees begging god forgiveness. You continued to eat, pretending everything was normal and Wanda was only an old friend of your mom’s coming to visit. Wanda went on to answer a few questions asked by your father, while you listened, waiting for Wanda to make her move on you. She seemed to always catch you by surprise. 
“No husband and no kids. I don’t think I’ll ever be ready to have kids.”
“Surely the right man will come along in time hon. You’re a gorgeous woman and anyone would be lucky to have you.”
You rolled your eyes, glancing down at your plate. Wanda shrugged, tugging at her bottom lip before taking another bite. “Maybe, but I think I’ll manage just fine without one,” she said, lifting her glass for a sip and then turning her attention to you. 'What about you? Anyone catching your eye?
The question caught you by surprise but you responded casually, figuring she was trying to get to know you better. “No one at the moment, just focused on getting through college applications, ma’am.” You cleared your throat the second you finished, the last few words getting stuck. From the ugly expression your own mother gave you across the table, she scowled you for not speaking properly. 
Wanda squeezed your arm reassuringly, always ready to come to your rescue. “Oh, she's perfectly fine.” She winked and settled in for a few more bites from her own plate. “I do hope to see you all around town. I figured I’d be delighted to extend my stay.”
Your father nodded and gulped the little bit of wine he had left. “Well, Wanda, you're always welcome here. Perhaps you’d be able to help our daughter with her applications. We never have the time to assist her.
"I can manage just fine, father," you said confidently
Your mother cleared her throat and dabbed her mouth, nodding in agreement. "I don’t want you getting into some party college and wasting your life. God has a plan for you, and you'd better stick to it, girl. Wanda, what do you think?"
Wanda's nose scrunched up, her lips stretched, and a small twinkle settled in her green eyes. You pondered what thoughts were swirling in her head as she agreed. Despite the knot twisting a thousand times over, it seemed clear God did not intend for Wanda swooping in and destroying his plan.  
As you grappled with making sense of your emotions, the sensations from Wanda’s touch made you forget how to use your head. It wasn’t love but rather a twisted plan Wanda woven you into. 
“I should be going.” She scooched out as she stood up, extending her hand. She gazed over towards you. “Be a dear and walk me out.” 
With a brisk nod, you got up and waited for Wanda to gather herself before following her closely behind. You can hear your heart thumping, afraid she might even hear it. As soon as the front door opened, she turned around quicker than you could comprehend the situation. Her eyes floated down your body and back up to your face. “Sure do look beautiful honey.”
When you didn’t reply she grasped your chin between her fingers, one eyebrow raised. “What do we say when someone gives you a compliment?”
“Th—nk you ma’am.”
She hummed pleased. “I’ll be seeing you.”
TAGLIST:
Taglist is closed so the ones on the list will be added for the rest of the chapters until I figure out another way to do a taglist. I was thinking of the google survey thing I saw someone was doing.
if you didn't tag in this for some reason, I either typed in your user and tumblr couldn't find your account . (:
@ifthisaintmee @the-lakes89 @aru-son
@maximoff-jp @unicorniusfallapatorius @random-fag @natashaswife4125 @wndasdoll
@thursdayygrrrl @falloutboy-lover @obsessedwjill @ksandraxox @scarletnatsblog
@bbbyliv0202 @peyt-n @wandaswife13 @criticsstuff @kimlipimsingle @sam-h-69
@rowiebear @thalia-is-not-ok @immclovinmilfs
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ramons-elevator · 7 months
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So if we do get the eggs/a few eggs/Richas back today, I wanna say that as of today, its been
74 Days since we last saw the eggs on Quesadilla Island
To put that into perspective:
Bobby was only alive for 44 days
Pomme was adopted on day 56 of the QSMP
The Election Arc was for 55 days
From the Brazilians arriving to Spiderbit’s wedding was only 47 days
WalterBob wasnt introduced until Day 80
Wilbur was gone for 171 days before his brief return; almost making Tallulah gone for half the time her dad was gone
Also:
The OG eggs have spent 34% of their time away
Tallulah has spent 36% of her time away
Richas has spent 39% of his time away
Pomme has spent 43% of her time away
Bonus:
The Eggs disappeared on September 7th so the OG eggs and Richas spent 2 birthdays away from their parents and Tallulah and Pomme spent 3 birthdays away from their parents
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slayingfiction · 1 year
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How I push through writing when I don't feel like writing.
Here are some of the techniques that I use to help me write more often or more consistantly when my laziness/depression/anxiety starts to take over.
I watch TV. I don't do it with the purpose of zoning out though. I watch something popular and well-liked such as the LOR or Harry Potter to get new ideas on how I can develop my story and apply their in-depth world-building ideas to help develop mine. Without plagarizing of course!!!!
Zoning out and daydreaming. As I have mentionned before, daydreaming is a huge part of my story outlining and world-building process. I'll stand in the shower, or take a walk and think about how my charcaters would act/react/behave in situations, mundane or not. Doing this gives me a better sense of my characters, and sometimes gives me ideas for scenes I use later on.
Work on writing related projects. These work well at keeping me distracted while still being productive on my writing goals. Example, I have one story I am working now, I made a new language (alphabet and numbers included) to include as a cool and fun component for the book. So, at times when I don't wan't to write, I continue creating the dictionary (very fun, 8/10 would recommend). Also, for the same book, my characters don't work off the Georigian calendar and 24 hour clock, so I've been working at creating a new calendar (harder than it seems, 2.5/10 dont recommend). These are side projects that help my story, without having to write.
Reading. You saw this one coming, I know. Reading is great, especially when you're editing, your writing style will unconsciously change to be more similar the author you were just reading. Also, most importantly, I'll be reading and think, "this story is really good, but you know what story I like even better? Mine." then change to writing.
This one is my biggest life saver!! I learnt about a year ago that sometimes I'll get bored of writing a story, and have difficulty keeping on track. That's why I finished my first book in 2016 and just started editing the first draft last week. The solution for me was to work on multiple projects at once, because it was much harder to be bored of multiple stories. I stick to 2, but will sometimes add a third. This is easy for me, because I have a list of over a dozen series I want to write. Don't abandon one project for another, use them as a distraction/ motivation for each other, so you're always furthering at least one project. I've never heard someone say, "oh no, i accidentally worked on this other writing project for three months instead of the other writing project I was doing. Dammit." No, we're just happy we have written something. Be sure to have well outlined story lines before starting, don't just start writing randomly or you'll reach a point where you don't know where to go from there.
Author/ writer projects. Maybe this is building a following, or community to share your projects and engage with. Tumblr, Insta, Reddit, whatever it is. My hope this year is to start up my website to offer publishing services (editing, graphic design, short writing courses) and build a following as a writer. (See what I did there? Never a bad time to self-promote ;) ) Having your own projects like this will help you in the future when you're going to try to publish and sell your books!
Talk with friends and a writing community. Never underestimate the passion that will burn inside you when talking about your story, or when others are talking about theirs. Surrounding yourself with a positive writing community can be the best thing for you as a writer.
Write or read (your story) every day. I'm not going to be one of those people that say you need to write 1000 words a day, that's a lot. But maybe try for 100? That could maybe only take 5 minutes, and at the end of the year that's still over 36 thousand words of a novel. Or just read your story, and I've always found it helped me get in the creative mood.
Make a playlist of songs that remind you of your characters, your story, or just puts you in the mood to write. Then play it ONLY when you're having trouble writing. Playing it while writing will not help, you'll get annoyed with the songs.
Just really can't do it today? That's okay, take a break. You deserve it. There's always tomorrow.
Does anyone else have ways they push themselves to keep writing? Let us know in the comments!
Happy Writing!
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itsgrimeytime · 8 months
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show me || Rick Grimes (TWD)
rick grimes taglist: @golden-hoax @mgparker
AVAILABLE ON AO3
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dialogue prompts: “Why are you mad?” “I’m not mad, I just think you can choose better people to kiss.” (2) + “Look me in the eyes and tell me you don’t feel the same as I do, then I’ll leave you alone.”  (36) + “I’m tired of being on the sidelines.”  (43)
Summary: You and Rick had something, you weren't quite sure what it was. After a few drunken mistakes during one of the dinner parties at Alexandria, Rick wants to make things crystal clear.
TWS: TENSION, blood, gore, gun violence (violence in general), alcohol, drunkness, drunken kisses, kind of dark!Rick, jealousy, possessiveness, protectiveness, all things consistent with TWD.
[[A/N: The vibes are in with this one, girlies. Kind of listened to Boyfriend by Dove Cameron for this one. SO... Be ready for that. Thanks for reading!!! ]]
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Your head hurt after the night before, you couldn't quite remember why. Well, other than the drinks.
It had been the first dinner party after Alexandria, you were nervous and just kept sipping. Somebody kept giving you more, even though, you remember distinctly Rick (big hands and blue, blue eyes) warding them off. They continued when he wasn't by your side -beer after beer and maybe something... else? You couldn't really remember.
You gathered pretty quickly that Rick was mad at you that day, something about the way he composed himself -the steaming rage enveloping him, and it only continued for days.
Day after day, and nothing. Usually, you could read him like a book, but now, all you got was well, that he was mad at you. Not even to get you started on the way everyone else was distinctively ignoring your questions like Rick had told them to.
So, you stepped out of your comfort zone -you went straight to the most honest Alexandrian you knew. Or the one who would speak to you over Rick's head -Deanna.
There was something deep in your chest that told you somehow this was betrayal, but you had been driven far past that point. (One blue-eyed glare and complete head turn to ignore you past that point.)
"Hey," you spoke, a little uneasy.
"Hello, Y/N!" she smiled, big and bright, "-I'm glad to see that dinner has been going so well-"
"That's actually what I was here to talk to you about," you echoed, direct in your tone, "-last dinner party, I... I don't remember what happened."
"Nothing bad, I can assure you," she hummed, continuing to walk down the street, "-I'm well aware of anyone overstepping."
"Right, well, I'm glad, but-" you spoke, a little impatiently -eyes darting around, "-I don't remember."
"Nothing wrong with getting a little drunk," she spoke, something in her shifting, "-we understand the change is-"
"Deanna," you interrupted with finality, "-please, just tell me what happened."
She paused in her steps, turning around to fully face you -head on, and something in you shrunk at her inquisitive gaze. She looked at you a bit like a puzzle for a moment, before her eyes seemed to light up in understanding like she knew exactly what the issue was.
"Let's..." she began, slowly, "-Let's talk inside, shall we?"
You merely followed her up the steps and into her house, like a sheep to its shepherd -you were desperate. If she could help, you would just about do anything.
"I was wondering just what was with him," Deanna muttered to herself, "-makes so much sense now."
She led you to her living room, where the room was much the same in her own home, but she had photos -framed and set pristinely of faces you didn't quite know. Ones you doubted you ever would.
"Sit," she motioned, "-we have much to discuss."
"Much?" you questioned.
"Well, no, it's-" she started, but faltered for a moment, "-rather complicated."
"Complicated?" you questioned further, raising your voice.
"Look, I'm going to just tell you to avoid any further confusion. You kissed someone, can't remember who now-"
You paused, faltering for a minute, "That's it?"
"Rick saw," she finished as if it was some big reveal.
You and Rick had a thing, a very slight thing that neither of you had really even commented on or talked about. Hell, you hadn't even kissed the guy, but there was something there, a deep buzz under your skin. And something in the apocalypse was something, sure, but not if he didn't talk to you about it. Not if he-
You stopped your train of thought, "So?"
"Aren't you-" she seemed to pause, being taken off guard, "-Aren't the two of you together?"
"I'm sorry?" you asked, "-No, we're not... not really. He doesn't- It doesn't matter, drunkenly kissing a guy is no reason to get this pissy."
"It is if you're together."
"Deanna," you started, "-don't push your luck. Look, I have to go sort this out, do you-"
"Oh, no, please," she answered, quickly, "-I can't get a word in with the man right now. Fix it, go."
That's how you wound up here, ready at his door -he couldn't ignore you at his own home. You'd get him to listen.
"Rick," you addressed, direct as soon as the door opened and you saw the blue of his eyes, "-hey."
He seemed to still at your voice -frozen for a moment, before wordlessly moving around the kitchen. He was gathering up dishes, at a sure pace before, but now he'd begun much faster. As if he was trying to get away from you.
"Alright, enough-" you said, waltzing up to him, and turning his face to yours, "-why are you mad?"
Rick looked at you for a moment, and something in you almost grew shy at the attentiveness. Blue eyes dashing along your face like you were fresh water and he had been stranded in the desert.
And then, he stopped. Lifting his soapy hands to take yours off his face -a slow, gentle movement. The opposite of someone mad, you noted.
"Do we need to talk 'bout this?" He echoed, a little helplessly if you were honest.
"I don't know," you answered, "-you tell me. Can you not be mad if we don't talk about this?"
"I'm not," he sighed, turning back to the dishes -this time doing them leisurely, "-I'm not mad. I just..."
"You just what?" You asked, pointedly.
"I just think you can choose better people to kiss," he grumbled out so low you weren't even sure you'd heard him correctly.
But something in you fired off like a rocket.
"Seriously?!" You yelled out, a sort of toned frustrated yell, but still a yell, "-you are pissed because you don't approve?"
"That's not-"
"Well, I got good news for ya, Sheriff, I don't even remember who I kissed last night-"
"That's because he made ya so drunk-"
"-And on top of that, I can kiss who I want, when I want. It's not like you have any control over that-"
"I want to," he grumbled out, even lower.
You stilled, "I'm sorry...?"
He didn't speak for a moment, washing the soap off his hands -you watched the water trail down to his elbow. Scrubbing away at the dish towel, he dried them and turned to face you.
Rick's steps were slow and sure, you could hear the clink of the tile under his boot. And your heart started pounding with anticipation, maybe he was mad. Why was he getting so close-
He was just in front of you now, finger trailed under your chin, "Tell me to stop, if you don't want this."
You turned your head down to look at the tile, something in your breath catching that you could barely breathe. You just needed a second-
He flicked your eyes back to him, and you could feel his breaths on your lips, "Look me in the eyes and tell me you don't feel the same as I do, then I'll leave you alone."
"Rick-"
He raised an eyebrow, "I asked a question, Y/N."
"How do you feel?"
He roamed closer, eyes dashing between the two of yours and your lips, "I think you know, sweetheart."
You opened your mouth.
"But," he interrupted, "-if ya insist."
Rick pulled back slightly, hand leaving its trail to, instead, hold your wrists -gently, as his thumbs rubbed into your wrists. With another breath, he kissed your palms -pressing his lips there ever so slightly.
"I'm tired of being on the sidelines," he spoke, low and soft, "-I... I want it to be us. Together."
"Together?" You echoed.
"Like you stay in my house, you sleep in my bed, we go to dinners together instead of so... so far apart-"
"And you can tell me who to kiss?" You added, playfully.
"And I'm the only one you can kiss," he corrected with the smallest of grins, but there was something hard in his eyes. Something serious.
"So," you spoke, expectantly, "-kiss me then. So, I can see what I'm stuck with."
"Stuck?" He laughed, slowly leaning in, "-Oh darlin' you're gonna be far from stuck."
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thetriumphantpanda · 1 year
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the touch of a hand lit the fuse
So, turns out y'all lapped up my dbf!Joel and now I'm kinda speechless? Like, tysm for loving this enough to like semi-blow it up. But never fear, our favourite neighbourhood DILF is back and filthier than ever today. I wrote this under the influence of a rather strong margarita, so forgive any mistake and the uninhibited filth you're about to consume. Enjoy.
Pairing | dbf!Joel x female reader
Summary | Four days on from being spread on Joel's lap, he's back to fix up your attic when you're home alone.
Word Count | 3.6k
Warnings | I mean, blanket warning for dbf!Joel because he's always a menace. Alcohol consumption, NO USE OF Y/N, masterbating (F), unprotected PiV sex (Don't be dumb, wrap it up), age gap (Reader is 25, Joel is 36), size kink, some dirty talk and that's it.
Part 1 | Main Masterlist
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It was Wednesday and you were still reeling from what had happened at the party on Saturday. Whenever you led in bed there was the feeling of Joel’s fingers ghosting over you. You were ashamed of the number of times you’d touched yourself, trying to emulate how Joel’s fingers had felt inside of you, failing miserably, but still getting yourself off with tight circles on your clit, moaning his name into your pillow as you made yourself come. It was a dreadful substitute, but you didn’t have much choice – Joel had been MIA since he'd left on Saturday night. 
You were sat at the table in the kitchen with your parents, sipping on orange juice and pushing eggs around your plate before they both went to work, “Oh, I forgot to mention, Joel’s coming over this morning to take a look at starting that work in the attic, you’ll be around to let him in, won’t you?” 
You tried to keep as nonchalant as possible at your dad’s voice, “Yeah, I’ll be here.” 
A house to yourself with Joel Miller, of course you’d be here, there was no-where else you’d rather be. Once your parents had eaten and stacked their dishes for you to wash up in your free time later, you raced upstairs to your room, dragging out the tightest pair of shorts you owned and a low-cut tank top. You’d never been the type to play into this sort of thing – if someone wanted you, then they could want you in your baggy jeans and jumpers, but Joel was different, and you knew it. You’d seen it the last time, how he fought to the last second not to give into you and his desires, you didn’t want to give him a reason to do it again. 
You made quick work of hopping in the shower before pulling your clothes on, choosing a coloured bra to sit under your white tank top, but deciding against underwear beneath your shorts. Then you sat on couch and waited, anticipation rising with every minute there wasn’t a knock on the door. It took him another hour to arrive – the knock at the door dragging a gasp of surprise from your lips. 
You practically ran to the front door, stopping only to run a hand through your hair and take a deep breath before you opened it. It never mattered where or when you saw him, he was always fucking gorgeous. Like now, stood in front of you, toolbox in hand, dark t-shirt and jeans clinging to him, hair mused and a smirk on his lips. 
“Sorry I’m late sugar,” He breathes, “Had to cover a job first thing for Tommy.” 
“That’s alright,” You smile, leaning against the door so he can walk past, “You want a drink of anything?” 
You were slightly put out that he hadn’t immediately bent his head and planted a kiss to your lips, but you weren’t going to be a brat about it. At least not yet. 
“Water’ll be just fine thanks,” He says over his shoulder as he’s moving towards the stairs, “I’m just gonna get started, don’t let me interrupt you.” 
You’re not interrupting anything is what you want to say, but he’s already taking the stairs two at a time, as if he’s in a rush to get away from you. It hurts, but you try and swallow your pride for now. He wasn’t going to get away with it that easily. 
You fill up a glass of water from the fridge with some ice, it’s hot after all, before you head upstairs. He’s already got the ladder from the attic down and is searching through his toolbox for what he needs, setting each different tool on his utility belt when he finds it. 
“You want me to pass this up to you once you’ve tackled the ladder, Miller?” You ask. 
He turns to you with his hand on one of the ladder rungs, “I’d be much obliged, sweetheart.” 
You swear that he takes each step of the ladder excruciatingly slow just for your benefit, but you aren’t going to complain – it affords you a glorious view of his ass, fitting tightly into his jeans – had he done that to you on purpose, just like you did for him? You watch intently as he turns and kneels and sticks his hand down for the glass of water. You pass it to him, and he does exactly what he did with his bottle of beer on the weekend, grabs it exactly where your hand is so his fingers brush against yours. Lighting a fuse right through your body. If you could spontaneously catch fire you think this would have done it.
“I’ll be downstairs if you need me, just shout.” 
You flop yourself down on the couch, huffing out an annoyed breath as you reach for the magazine you’d been trying to read before he arrived. Thinking it would be easier to concentrate on now Joel was working away upstairs, you’re sorely mistaken. Your eyes glaze over the same two sentences – it’s an advice column, some housewife wanting to know how she could make her husband want her again after months of living in a dead bedroom. You don’t pretend to care, you look down to the bottom of the column – Andrea, 48. What you really want the editor to say in response is that Andrea should cut her losses, find someone younger, fitter and more handsome and sack off her obviously boring husband. What they really say is that she can spice things up by wearing sexy lingerie and being spontaneous, maybe you can try taking sex out of the bedroom for things to feel newer and more exciting. 
They’d got that much right. Your brain is drifting back to Saturday night, sat on Joel’s lap with his thick fingers moving in and out of your pussy. That had been new and exciting. Maybe Andrea should try that with her own husband. 
You sigh and throw the magazine to the ground – nothing is going to stop the bubbling lust and frustration in your stomach. Nothing except for what you really want, and that Joel, peeling your clothes off and seating himself so deep inside you that you can’t think properly. You can hear him banging around in the attic, unsure of what he’s actually doing. 
Before you know what you’re doing, one of your hands is making quick work of undoing the button on your shorts, moving them just enough so you can slip your hand below the material. Your ears focus on sound of Joel’s footsteps in the distance. You bet there’s a thin film of sweat on his skin up there, you think as your fingers dip to the entrance of your pussy, finding yourself just as wet as you were on the weekend. Maybe he’s taken his shirt off, you think as the slick you’d gathered on your fingers make sliding them over your clit easier. The mental vision of the muscles in his back rippling as he bends to work and the way his arms would tense make bringing yourself to the edge of oblivion a piece of cake, but it’s the final vision you have of him pushing you against the dank attic wall and pounding into you that has you coming. You bite down on your hand to stop yourself from making noise, convulsing on the couch with the aftershocks of your orgasm. 
There was a slight feeling of embarrassment that sat through your stomach for a moment when you’d realized you’d gotten yourself whilst Joel was unaware upstairs. You quickly buttoned up your shorts and placed an arm over your eyes whilst you tried to catch your breath and before you could stop yourself you were drifting off to sleep. 
You woke with a start God knows how long later, the sound of something hitting the ground drawing you from your dreamless nap. You sat up and rubbed at your eyes and saw Joel setting his toolbox by the front door. 
“Sorry, didn’t mean to fall asleep.” You mumble, pushing yourself off the couch. 
“S’alright,” He smiles at you, “S’your house.” 
“You get everything done?” You ask. 
He shakes his head, “Gonna be a big job up there, don’t have the stuff to finish it all today.” 
You nod like you understand, “Anything else on today?” 
He smirks at you like he knows what you’re thinking, “Nope,” is all he says, “You?” 
You match his smirk, “Nope, convenient huh?” He nods, “You want a drink?” 
You look at the clock on the wall, it’s nearing 2pm, “Beer?” 
“Yes ma’am.”
You try and push down the arousal that pooled in your stomach at that. It hadn’t been two hours since you’d gotten yourself off but God there was just something about this man that made your blood run hot and turned you into something akin to a dog in heat. He follows behind you as you go to the kitchen, gratefully accepting the ice-cold beer that you’d popped the cap off. 
You stand at opposite sides of the kitchen – Joel leant up against the counter near the sink, you doing similar against the breakfast island. It’s silent as you both eye one another up, taking languid sips of beer as you do so. You could cut the tension in here with a fucking knife. You made the first move last time, it’s his turn to do it. 
“Y’know you don’t have to wear that kinda stuff for me, don’t ya?” His eyebrow is cocked, and you know he’s talking about the shorts that barely cover your ass and the blue bra he can clearly see through your top. 
“Shall I take them off then?” 
He’s leant against the kitchen counter, looking as casual as can be, but you don’t miss the way his eyes darken, glazed with lust. He takes another drink of his beer before setting the bottle down, crossing his arms over his chest, eyebrow raised. 
“You wanna see me naked, Joel Miller?” 
“You want me to see you naked?” He counters.
“You’re in charge baby, you need to tell me what you want.” You dare. 
He sucks his bottom lip into his mouth as he’s thinking before he’s unraveling his arms from his chest, “Well, in that case, come over here and kiss me.” 
Your feet are moving before he’s even finished speaking, closing the gap between you. You wrap your arms around his neck, pushing yourself up on your tiptoes as his own arms wrap around your waist as his dips his head and wastes no time connecting your lips together. As soon as they do you can feel the tension dripping from your body, pooling on the floor as if it never existed. 
Joel’s got you pulled flush to his body, warmth radiating through the material covering your bodies as his mouth opens and he’s swiping his tongue across your bottom lip before he takes it between his teeth and bites down slightly. He slips his tongue into your mouth when you gasp at the slight bite of pain from his teeth, which is quickly forgotten when you can taste him on your mouth. The slight yeast from the beer, something minty, suggesting he’d been chewing gum whilst working and the inevitable flavour that’s just pure Joel that you cannot place.
His hands are slipping down from your waist to cup your ass – hands on bare skin where the globes of your ass meet the back on your thighs, dragging you further into him. You can feel his own arousal prodding between you which has a moan tumbling from your lips, swallowed by Joel’s own mouth as he continues to lick into your mouth. 
His hands are sliding around to the front of your shorts, deftly undoing the button, not unlike how you’d done it just a few hours before. His hand is snaking down into the material and then he’s pulling away from your lips, a groan of frustration leaving your mouth as he does so. 
“What’s this?” He asks, brushing his fingers along the seam of your pussy, “Didn’t wanna bother with lace today?” 
“Saving time.” You mumble, a sigh leaving your lips as his fingers move lower. 
“Fuckin’ hell sweetheart, are you always this wet?” He groans when one of his finger’s dips slightly between your folds. 
“Only for you,” Another sigh, “I… fuck, Joel…” You’re trying to get your words out but the way he’s brushing your slick up the seam of your pussy but neglecting your clit means it’s hard to concentrate, “I touched myself, thinking of you.” 
He stops dead in his tracks, pulling his face away from you, “When?” He demands. 
You turn your head to look at the clock behind you, “Probably two hours ago now.” 
He growls, gripping you tightly to his body, “You filthy girl,” You can do nothing but grin, “You touched your pussy whilst I was upstairs?” 
You nod, moving so you can press a kiss to his neck, “Show me.” He asks. 
There’s confusion on your face when you pull back, “You don’t need me, obviously, so show me how you touched yourself whilst I was slaving away upstairs.” 
He pushes you away from his body gently, and you’re going to turn around to walk somewhere to lie down and give him a show, but he’s stopping you, “Do it here,” He’s motioning his hand for you to stay in the kitchen, “Come on sweetheart, don’t keep me waitin’.” 
You take your place leant back against the kitchen counter, running your hand down your body before it dips into your shorts. Joel’s eyes are staring holes into your skin as your fingers dip to your seeping hole, you let your eyes flutter closed as you gather your slick on your fingers, bringing it up to circle your clit. This time when you want to moan, you don’t bite down on anything, moaning Joel’s name as loud as you please. 
When you open your eyes, fingers not letting up on pleasuring yourself, you can see him in a similar position to yours, palming himself through his jeans at the show you’re putting on, “Does it feel good, sweetheart?” He coos from across the kitchen, “Bet I’d make you feel even better, right?” 
“Oh god, Joel, please-” You gasp as you speed up the circles on your clit, “I want you to touch me.” 
He chuckles as he steps forward to meet you, trapping you against the kitchen island with an arm on either side of you. He’s pressing kisses behind your ear but is making no attempt to touch you past that. Fingers still firmly pressing against your clit, you grind your hips forward into his own, “Oh baby,” He whispers, “D’ya need some help?” You nod, “What d’ya want from me?” 
“Fingers-” You gasp out, “Put your fingers inside me.” 
He kisses your neck, using his hands to push your shorts from your legs, letting them drop to the floor, before he’s kicking at one of your ankles to push your legs further apart. Then, he’s sinking one of his deliciously thick fingers right into your seeping cunt, causing you to cry out. 
“It’s alright babygirl,” He chuckles against your skin, “Makin’ you feel good, right?”
He’s pulling his finger back out of your pussy before adding another one when he pushes them back in, “Can feel how tight you are, already, you gonna come for me?” 
“Fuck-” You exclaim when he’s curling his fingers up inside you whilst his mouth drags hot trails across your collarbone, “Don’t stop, please-” You beg, “So fucking close Joel.” 
“Good girl, show me how good I make you feel.” 
With the incessant rubbing you’re doing over your clit and the curve of Joel’s fingers inside you, you come undone. His name is almost shouted from your lips and you can feel his free hand on your waist, keeping you upright. On Saturday he’d worked you through the aftershocks, but not today, he’s pulling his fingers from your pussy, shoving them into your mouth and watching as you lick yourself off him. Then his tongue is back in your mouth and he's grinding his bulge against you whilst he laps up the taste of you on your mouth. 
“Fuck, you taste so good babygirl,” He’s whispering once he’s pulled away, “One day I’m gonna spread you out and spend hours with my head between your thighs.” 
Heat flushes through your body – you want to respond but you don’t have time. He’s turning you around and with a hand placed gently on the nape of your neck, he’s pushing you forward so your body is spread over the kitchen island. You can hear him unbuckling his belt behind you and you can’t quite believe this is about to happen. 
When you hear the material of his jeans hit the floor you swear you can feel yourself drip down the inside of your thigh, you’re that turned on. 
“I’m gonna fuck you sweetheart,” His body is towering behind yours as his hands take your hips and pull you back, “That okay?”
You nod and moan out a ‘yes please’ as he’s lining himself up behind you. You can feel the head of his cock sliding between your folds before Joel is sinking into you from behind. He’s slow because he knows it’s a tight fit, despite all your preparation the feeling of him stretching you is bordering on uncomfortable, but you just can’t get enough. He stills himself when he’s buried inside you to the hilt. You can hear his gasps and his heavy breathing behind you as he tries to calm himself down. 
“Fuckin’ Christ baby, you’re fuckin’ tight around my cock.” 
“Feel so full Joel,” You moan back at him, hands gripping at the kitchen island as he pulls back and thrusts himself back into you, “You’re so fucking big.” 
You can hear him chuckle as his hands grip tighter at your hips, you’re convinced you’re going to have finger shaped bruises there, “That’s right babygirl,” He pulls out once more and thrusts back into your tight heat with more force than before that has you crying out, “Look at you,” He praises, “All spread out in your daddy’s kitchen gettin’ fucked by his best friend.” 
It's filth but by God it’s doing the job, the way his voice is deeper, and his words are peppered with groans and gasps as he starts fucking you in earnest. You can feel your pussy clenching around him with each thrust, any feeling of discomfort long gone, replaced just with an intense feeling of fullness peppered with ecstasy. 
You feel a hand come back to the nape of your neck, travelling higher until it’s tangled in your hair, yanking you backwards so your back is arched. You can feel Joel’s hips snapping into your ass, the new arch of your back has his cock hitting a spot inside you that has spots blurring your vision. 
All you can do is chant his name and let moans drop from your lips as his pace picks up again. He’s turned your brain to mush, not that you’re complaining. If you could keep the both of you here forever, locked in this state of secret pleasure then you would. 
“Sweetheart,” He chokes out behind you, hand still wrapped in your hair, “I’m gonna cum.” 
“Yes Joel, please-” You cry out, “Please give it to me.” 
“So fuckin’ pretty sweetheart,” He groans behind you, “Beggin’ me for my cum like a good girl.” 
When he pulls himself fully from your pussy you almost cry in frustration until you feel the warmth of his cum spreading over the cheeks of your ass. You can hear him moaning your name, one hand still firmly gripping your hip, the other, you assume, fisting his cock. When you’re sure he’s finished you let your forehead drop to the cool countertop whilst you catch your breath. 
You’re vaguely aware of Joel pulling his jeans back on and the sound of the tap running behind you. The feeling of a warm cloth spreading across your ass as he cleans his spend off you. It’s almost robotic as he gathers you and turns you round, bending down to shimmy your shorts back up and over your hips. He even does the button up for you. 
“You okay?” He asks, pressing a kiss to the tip of your nose. 
You smile, exhaustion settling into your bones as he holds you, “Never better.” 
“Hope I wasn’t too rough sweetheart.” 
“I don’t mind,” You smirk, reaching up to press a kiss to his lips, “Want you to make me sore so whenever I move I remember this.” 
“You can’t be real babygirl,” He’s chuckling, “You keep sayin’ things like that and I’ll never leave.” 
You’re pulled from your post-coital bliss by the sound of a car door slamming out front. Your eyes widen and so do Joel’s. You quickly glance at the clock and realise he’s had you bent over the kitchen counter for far longer than you’d anticipated. 
“Fuckin’ hell,” He’s mumbling, making sure he kisses your lips firmly, “I gotta get outta here, but I’ll see you soon, okay?” 
“Okay.” You nod with a smile, you fucking hope so. 
He leaves with a squeeze of your hand, jogging to the door to grab his toolbox. You hear the door open and then he’s greeting your mother with a ‘Hello ma’am, good day?’ – you can just about hear your mother recounting her day to him and then asking him how the work in the attic went. 
“Went fine, still a fair bit to do so just let me know when y’all are going to be out again in the week and I’ll come back to finish up.” 
“Well, you know we work all week and I’m sure that one in there won’t mind a little banging about from you.” 
Oh if only you knew mom, if only you knew. 
715 notes · View notes
tigertales9 · 10 months
Text
Déjà vu II
Pairing: Joe Burrow x Reader
Warnings: 18+ / Smut
Description: Things get heated (due to backwards cap hotness) after the preseason game between the Bengals & Packers
Time/Place: August 11, 2023 / Cincinnati, Ohio
A/N: This is the follow-up to Déjà vu
Inspo pic: Getty Images (edit)
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You lean against the wall in the stadium tunnel, waiting to give Joe a quick hug after the game before heading home. 36-19 had been the final score; it was the first preseason game, though, so no need to panic just yet.
You smile to yourself as you let your mind wander to earlier in the night; watching Joe put in work doing throwing drills and running wind sprints had everyone in high spirits. You could feel the collective sigh of relief from Bengals fans when they saw their QB1 looking so good just two weeks after the calf strain. Joe wasn't 100 percent yet, but he was getting better by the day.
Then later during the game you were hit with a sense of déjà vu watching Joe on the sideline looking like walking sex. Something about him wearing the earpiece and stalking around frustrated when the offense wasn't clicking was just hot as hell. The backwards cap was the cherry on the eye-candy sundae.
You're still contemplating that last thought as you raise your head and lock eyes with Joe striding toward you, still wearing the backwards cap that had you squirming in your seat all night. Your stomach does a somersault at the look on his face. "Hey," you greet him with a smile as he reaches you, grabbing your hand and pulling you deeper into the tunnel, giving you a wink when you raise your eyebrows at him. "Where are we going?" you mutter, your eyes going wide when he ushers you through the vast locker room and into one of the treatment rooms, the door barely shutting behind you before he's got you pressed against it. "Damn," you whisper, dropping your bag and sliding your hands up his muscular chest as his mouth captures yours, his hot tongue plunging inside to tangle with yours as you cling to his broad shoulders.
After a few minutes you finally come up for air. "Is the door locked?" you breathe, dropping a hand down to tease him through his slinky shorts. "No," he answers, "there's no lock on the door, but we've got about five minutes before a trainer comes in to do my treatment." You immediately snatch your hand away from his crotch and give him an exasperated look. "Five minutes?"
"Yeah," he chuckles, giving you a sheepish look just as someone knocks on the door. You grab your bag and step aside, smiling at the trainer who enters the room as soon as Joe opens the door.
"Oh sorry!" the trainer chirps, his face going crimson as he looks back and forth between you and Joe. "I didn't mean to interrupt."
"No problem," you soothe. "I was just leaving." You give Joe a smile and lean in close. "See you at home," you whisper. "Make sure to wear this backwards cap." You run a finger over the snapback strap adorning his forehead before heading for the door, throwing a quick glance over your shoulder as you walk out, the sight of Joe biting his plump bottom lip practically seared into your brain as you head for the exit.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
An hour later you're standing in your kitchen, freshly showered and wearing skimpy lace panties and one of Joe's t-shirts, your body humming with anticipation as you pour a glass of pinot noir and take a sip. You had nothing but water at the game, and you need just a little something to take the edge off as you wait for Joe to get home.
You open the fridge and pull out a bowl of red seedless grapes, tossing a couple in your mouth and damn near moaning at the combo of sweet, cold grapes chased with a swallow of lush, plummy wine. You repeat the action a few times before your ears perk up, your entire body reacting to the sound of Joe coming in the garage door.
He hits you with a panty-dropping grin when he rounds the corner. "I'm still wearing the backwards cap," he purrs, walking straight up to you as you offer him a grape. "Good boy," you praise, a pulse of arousal sizzling through you at the look in his eyes as he opens his mouth for you. "Mmmm, juicy," he moans, holding eye contact as you pop another grape in his mouth. "You got anything else juicy for me, baby girl?"
You can tell from the cadence of his speech and his body language that he still has some pent-up frustration from the game, from not being able to get on the field and unleash hell on the opponents. "Maybe," you tease, biting your lip and giving him a dirty grin as he backs you up against the kitchen island, his hands sneaking under your t-shirt to settle on your waist just as his mouth crashes down on yours.
A few minutes into making out -- with one of his big hands caressing your breasts and the other making a beeline for your crotch -- his phone rings, both of y'all going completely still as he breaks the intense kiss to glance at his phone. "Shit … it's Coach," he grumbles, nibbling on your neck as you take a deep breath. "You better answer it," you whisper. "He wouldn't be calling this late if it wasn't important." Joe nods and makes a stank face as he grabs his phone. "Hey Coach," he quips. "Yeah, I can talk for a bit," he continues, rolling his eyes dramatically.
You squirm out of his grasp and head for the stairs, giving him a loaded look just before you vanish out of sight. You walk through the master bedroom into the en suite bathroom, quickly splashing cold water on your face to cool down your heated skin; as you pat dry with a towel, you consider rubbing one out since you're frustrated as fuck and Joe's conversations with Coach Taylor usually last a while, especially if they're talking schemes and strategy.
You're still pondering the idea when Joe strides into the bathroom, his eyes locking onto yours in the mirror like a heat-seeking missile. "That was fast," you whisper, tossing the towel to the side as he walks up behind you. "I told him I'd talk to him tomorrow," he mutters, unclipping the clasp holding your hair up, burying his nose in your hair and taking a deep breath as it tumbles down over your shoulders.
He nestles his erection against your ass while making eye contact with you in the mirror. "Real subtle, babe," you chuckle, lifting your arms so he can slip your t-shirt off. "Do I need to be subtle?" he asks, the raw lust in his voice causing a gush of liquid heat between your thighs. "No, sir," you breathe, watching closely as he whips his t-shirt off, accidentally taking his cap with it. You bite your lip as he slowly reaches for the cap, running his long fingers through his tousled hair a few times before easing the backwards cap back on his head. "Now … where were we," he growls, his deep voice tickling your ear in a way that makes you squeeze your thighs together to try and ease the relentless throbbing in your core; his hot gaze immediately flicks down to your crotch as he reads your body language. He licks his lips and lifts his gaze back up to yours, giving you a smile so dirty you feel it in every pleasure point in your body.
"What do you need?" he asks, lazily teasing your nipples while dropping open-mouthed kisses against your sensitive neck. "I need to cum," you grit out, squirming and whimpering as he continues to tease you. "I've been on the edge ever since I saw you in that damn backwards cap tonight."
"You like this look, huh?" he asks, checking his reflection in the mirror before spinning you around to face him. "I love that look," you whisper, your pulse kicking into overdrive as he drops to his knees at your feet, quickly sliding your soaked panties off before wrapping both hands around your waist to lift your ass onto the countertop. "How do you like this look?" he purrs, spreading your thighs wide and maintaining eye contact while licking a long stripe from your ass to your clit. "Yeah … don't stop!" you urge, leaning back against the mirror and resting your feet on his broad shoulders while he follows orders, devouring your clit and pistoning two fingers inside you, hitting your g-spot over and over until you come undone, your cries of pleasure still ringing in your ears a few minutes later as you gasp for breath.
He stands up when your core finally stops squeezing his fingers; he removes them and gives them a thorough suck, moaning deep in his throat when you clasp a hand behind his neck and pull his head down, licking your essence off of his lips before sucking his tongue into your mouth. "My dick is so hard I could hammer nails with it," he groans against your slick lips. "I got something else you can hammer," you purr, gasping when he quickly picks you up and spins you around, your feet barely touching the floor before he bends you over, shoves his shorts and underwear down and buries his cock in your slick heat.
You both groan as your core clamps down hard at the sudden intrusion; he holds himself completely still for several seconds, the sensual feel of his heartbeat throbbing deep inside you drawing a whine from your lips that immediately has him thrusting, shallow at first then full, deep thrusts. You rise up onto your tiptoes and grind back against him, your hard nipples tightening even more as they slide against the countertop, the marble providing a cool contrast to the heat radiating off of Joe as he hits a steady rhythm.
"Feels so fucking good, baby," he grits out, "look at me." You raise your head and meet his eyes in the mirror, biting your lip hard enough to hurt as he drops a hand down to tease your clit. "You like that?" he purrs, giving you a feral smile when you nod your head, your breath fogging up the mirror as you gasp and pant while he continues to ride you hard.
You eventually drop your forehead back down onto the countertop, almost too stimulated to hold eye contact as he expertly pleasures you, drawing whimpers and moans from your lips while lavishing dirty praise in that toe-curling raunchy voice. "I need to see your face," he mutters as he fists a hand in your long hair, wrapping it around his palm a couple times before tugging just hard enough to raise your head off the countertop; his eyes hold your gaze in the mirror for several seconds before he spits on your lower back, your breath catching in your throat as you feel it slide down between your buttcheeks. He quickly releases your hair to chase the spit with his thumb, following it all the way down to tease the edge of your hole as he picks up the pace of his thrusts, pinching your clit with his other hand, his icy-hot eyes locked on yours in the mirror when your climax hits.
You scream his name as the coiled tension inside you unleashes like the crack of a whip; he grabs your hips and tilts your ass up, your feet leaving the floor as he continues to fuck you through your orgasm, the sound of your flesh slapping together and the lush, wet sound of your drenched core as he pounds into you seemingly magnified in your ears as he follows you over the edge, the hot spurts of his climax making your walls spasm harder before finally tapering off.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Thirty minutes later you and Joe step out of the shower, your legs still trembling as he helps you dry off before picking you up bridal-style to carry you to bed. He lays you down gently before joining you, his damp hair slicked back as he gazes down at you in the dim lighting.
"You kinda like the backwards cap, huh?" he teases. "You know I do," you answer, rolling your eyes playfully at his cocky grin. "That was a little déjà vu, right?" he asks, nodding at the bathroom door as he continues. "Having raunchy sex while watching in a mirror with one of us wearing a hat."
You smile when he waggles his eyebrows at you. "Yeah, but you look way better in the backwards cap than I do in the cowboy hat."
"No way," he argues, leaning down to drop a kiss on your lips. "Agree to disagree," you giggle, yawning before snuggling against him as he pulls you close.
459 notes · View notes
venusacrossthestars · 4 months
Text
right person wrong time? wrong person, a fine time.
Pairing- Charles Leclerc x fem!reader
WC- 2.2k
warnings- angst, Charles is an ass, swearing(?) italics represent flashbacks
f1 masterlist
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Its been a year, 3 months, 2 weeks, and 4 days since Charles broke your heart. Its been a year, 3 months, 2 weeks, and 4 days since you last saw him. Its been a year, 3 months, 2 weeks, and 4 days since he said, ‘its not you, its me.’ Its been a year, 3 months, 2 weeks, and 4 days and yet you can’t fall asleep without thinking what could have been. 
All the traveling and distance was considered to be a curse during your relationship, now you were considering it a blessing. Monaco wasn’t a large country by any means, its own popularity along with its neighboring countries came from  tourist, travelers, and summer home owners. Meaning it was the perfect place to blend in with the hundreds of passing faces. Here you were hoping to go unrecognized. 
The first two weeks of your five week vacation were going swimmingly. You and a couple friends rented out a villa. You all swam, ate good food, shopped, sun tanned, everything you could imagine of a great vacation. 
It was a Tuesday morning and you and your friends were sitting out on the patio at some brunch cafe that was quickly becoming your favorite spot in Monaco when your luck of being incognito had run out. 
“Y/N?” you hear a familiar voice call out, and judging by the reactions of your friends you know exactly who it is.
Turning around in your seat to look up at the caller, you are greeted with the unfortunate sight of your ex-boyfriend. 
“Charles?” 
“Wow, its really you,” he seems surprised. 
“Yup, in the flesh,” you chuckle out uncomfortably. You shoot a look ‘help what do I do’ at your friends. 
“What are you doing here?” 
“On vacation, trying to enjoy the slow season before the fall.” 
“Oh that’s nice.” 
“Yeah.” Neither of you say a word after that. Your friends attention split between you and your ex.
After a moment of silence it seems that Charles finally gets the memo that you would like to get back to brunch, “I’ll leave you be, hopefully I’ll see you around.” 
You don’t reply, why would you lie and say you hoped to see him too? After the way things ended you were seriously hoping to never see Charles Leclerc ever again. 
The past few weeks had been rocky, you knew that. Charles had been having a few couple of weeks. A DNF at his home race, a poor performing car, pressure from the fans. You understood it all to be frustrating. Your work hadn’t been easy either. Someone had split their coffee on your silk piece for your show, you had to spend a full 36 hours having to re-sew the entire thing by hand in order to make the deadline. 
All you wanted right now was to curl up in your boyfriends arms, watch crappy tv and eat even crappier food. But it didn’t seem like any of that was going to be happening with the ominous ‘we need to talk’ text you got from Charles around lunch time.
When you entered the apartment it felt cold, empty, and overall unwelcoming. All the lights were off expect for the ones in the kitchen and sitting at the island was Charles with his head in his hands.
“Babe,” you began as you walked closer, “is everything ok? Your text gave me a bit of a start.” 
Charles doesn't respond and you move to rest your hand on his shoulder, he flinches at the contact as if he is repulsed by your touch. 
“I want to break-up,” Charles states out of the blue. 
Time stops, you swear it. The clock that hangs on the wall doesn’t move nor make a sound, the dripping faucet doesn’t let a drop of water fall, the quiet humming of the air conditioner is absent. All is still, except your rapidly beating heart. 
“What?” you croak out. 
“Its not you, its me.” Charles simply states, back still turned to you. 
“I find that hard to believe when you won’t even look me in the eyes.” You scoff, you can’t believe what you’re hearing. 
Charles shoots out of his chair and faces you. His hands flying up in the air. “I want to break up!” 
A “why?” escapes you  pathetically.  
“Its not you, its me.” he repeats. “The distance, me traveling for my job, you traveling for yours. It’s all too much. I’m not, I can’t do a relationship right now. It’s all too much.” 
“Charles,we talked about this just say the words and I’ll drop it all for you. You know this.” You tell him, referring to your conversation from a few weeks back that how you would take less responsibilities at your job if he wanted you too. 
“I can’t- I can’t do that to you.” 
“Oh but you’ll throw a two year relationship away,” now your angry. He throws this at you out of the blue. No hints, no major changes in his behaviors, nothing. 
“Y/N-” he beings but you are quick to cut him off.
“No, I deserve an explanation as to why this all of the sudden ‘this’ isn’t working.” 
“Y/N” he tries again. 
“It was all fine, yeah we had a few bad weeks but we have a gap week coming and maybe if we just try and relax we can-” 
“Maybe its because I don’t love you!” Charles now interrupts you. “Maybe its because I never loved you.” 
“Well now you are just being mean,” you weren’t going to cry. Why would you? It wasn’t like the man you have given your all too for the past two year was breaking your heart or anything? If you weren’t going to cry then what was running down your cheeks. 
“It’s the truth.” 
“You’re an ass. Typically Charles behavior. Run when things go though or don’t go your way. Too high and mighty.” 
“You don’t know what its like to be me, you wouldn’t understand.” 
“Then explain it to me! I have begged and begged you to let me in and all you do is push me away.” 
“It’s not that simple.” 
“Then you’re right. Its not me, its you. Its always you.” 
“Get out.” 
“What so now your mad that I agree with you?” 
“Get out,” Charles says again. 
“Gladly.” 
Two days have passed since you saw Charles at brunch and as much as you wanted to say it was nothing, you couldn’t. Seeing Charles brought up memories that you didn’t necessarily want to think about while on vacation. 
Today everyone was off doing their own thing, so you had the great idea to wander along the beach. Well it was a great idea until you heard your name being called, once again by no one other than Charles. 
Stopping in your tracks you turn to face the man who claimed he never loved you. 
“Are you following me?” 
Charles looks take aback by the question, “no?” 
You hum and continue walking, Charles follows. 
“I wasn’t kidding when I say it was nice to see you the other day. Its been a while, hasn’t it.” 
“Yup.” Exactly-1 year, 3 months, 2 weeks, and now 6 days,  you think to yourself. 
“So how have you been, anything new?”
“Been good, headlining my own show. Collaborations, sketching up new designs, same old same old.” 
“I saw. Congrats.” 
“Thanks,” you curtly reply. “Anything new with you?” Ever since the break-up you avoided looking at anything Formula 1 related. You can tell by his reaction that he didn’t know that. 
“Well, car is good this year. Still a little early to tell but I’ve got a good feeling about this year.” 
“That’s nice.” 
“Can we talk?” 
“Is that not what we’re doing?” 
“Well, I guess. I mean I want to apologize.” 
This stops you, you really didn’t want to have this conversation right now. You really never wanted to have this conversation ever. You turn now fully facing Charles, squinting at him. 
“I’m sorry for that night. I didn’t mean what I told you. You didn’t deserve any of what I said.” 
“I didn’t.” 
“That’s all you have to say?” 
“And that’s all you have to offer as an apology, after all this time?” 
“Well I’m not perfect.” 
You scoff, “see that, that right there is how I know you aren’t sorry.” 
“I am. I still love you. I was an ass. I was stressed. It was all too much. I truly wasn’t in the mindset to be in a relationship. I wanted to be a good boyfriend.” 
“You wanted to be a good boyfriend?” You chuckle, “if you wanted to be a good boyfriend you would’ve told me what was going on.” 
“You could’ve been a better girlfriend.” 
Typical Charles, is all you can think to yourself. You are now seething, emotions that have been pushed down and down, now surfacing. 
“I was willing to work it out,” you point at your chest, “all of the problems I was willing to work through for you.  I was willing to ignore the hurtful words because I loved you. I would’ve left everything behind. All of it. If it meant being with you. So don’t tell me I could have been a ‘better girlfriend’, unbelievable.” 
“Right person, wrong time.” Charles said quietly. 
You actually laugh at his statement. Was he high? At the beginning you might’ve thought that too. You loved him so deeply that you were willing to over look his flaws. But that night, that faithful night when he ripped your heart out and ran it over with his Ferrari you realized that someone who loved you would never do what he did to you. 
“No Charles, you were the wrong person at a fine time. The right person would try to work out their problems. The right person would listen to their girlfriends concerns. The right person wouldn’t tell the person they love, that they simply never loved them. The right person wouldn’t ask another woman to marry him not even a year later. And yet you stand here claiming to still love me. You wanted to be a good boyfriend, how about you focus on being a good fiance.” 
A look of hurt flashed over Charles face and for a moment you almost felt bad for him. But he hadn’t felt bad when he broke your heart. He hadn’t felt bad when he said that he couldn’t do a relationship and travel. He held no remorse for you when not even a month later he was seen with another woman hanging off his arms. And you know for a fact that he held no remorse when 7 months later he was asking her to be his wife. 
Yes, Charles the same man who told you that he wasn’t ready for a relationship was engaged to another woman. The same woman he was seen with not even a full month after he broke your heart. At first you thought he was cheating on you, who wouldn’t jump to that conclusion. But as much as you hated Charles he did surprisingly had morals. He might’ve met her when with you but you knew, mostly due to his hectic schedule, that he wasn’t cheating on you. 
“Speaking of which, how is the wedding planning going. Its been how long since the two of you got engaged?” You ask. You know how long its been. You know you’re being petty. You know asking about the engagement is a low blow. You should be the bigger person but there is something about the way he is looking at you that fills you with rage and sadness. 
“That’s none of your business.” Charles crosses his arms over his chest defensively. 
“Well I would say this has been nice but lets not kid each other. Charles I do wish you the best with everything, but please, don’t ever talk to me again.” 
You are quick to turn away, you don’t want to hear another word from him. This vacation was meant to be peaceful. You were meant to blend in and have fun. The last thing in the world you were expecting was to run into your ex. 
The once beautiful country of Monaco had now been tainted by the unpleasant memories of a time past. And you knew that no matter how much you loved the atmosphere, the people, the culture that you would never be able to wash the memory of Charles away. Charles Leclerc has officially ruined Monaco for you. 
That night after you recounted the story to your friends over a crappy bottle of tequila, you went to bed and did something you haven’t done for a year, 3 months, 2 weeks, and 6 days, you googled ‘Charles Leclerc’ and the first thing that that popped up might’ve been a surprise to everyone, but not you. “Charles Leclerc and long-time fiancée mutually call off engagement”. 
And for the first time in a year, 3 months, 2 weeks, and 6 days you fell asleep not thinking of Charles Leclerc and what might’ve been.
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taglist- crossed out names mean I could not tag you
@arieslost @astrostar24 @aneverythingwriter @maryseesthings @boiohboii @lexiestarkey @scaramou @anedpev @simplyscorpio @the-untamed-soul @stupendousrebeldreamer @lyana344 @moonlightem @itsbwokenln4 @a-daydreamers-day @barcelono @naturallyspontaneous @bunbun9396 @meredithmeiz @clowngirlsstuff @jordy-jor5 @charlesleclerx @loveyatopluto @lewisroscoelove @graciearnold1 @saiteliites @oliveswiftly @lover122 @dear-fifi @onecojg @martaaairwin1994-blog @bigchrisevansmarvelsoul @sittingalonereads @fuckmylifedudee @hanniesdawn @leonie-swift @havaneselover08 @homosexualjohnwayne @bjralph @naaanasworld @dannyramirezwife @mileeen-aa @futuristicherobailifflamp @boherahpsody
319 notes · View notes
artemisthewh0re · 10 months
Text
Choose You
College!Miguel O'hara x Chubby Black reader
Warnings: Smut, hurt/comfort, unprotected sex, piv, Gwen Stacy is a bitch (love Gwen but I needed a bully 😭), fatphobia, bullying, name calling (piggy, whale, etc)
A/N: This is really bad I'm sorry! I had a mild mental health crisis halfway through writing this but I hope you like it!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️
@optimuslaim
Your head hangs low as you eat your breakfast in the dining hall. The noise of the hall dulls your thoughts as you play with the runny eggs on your plate. That is quickly interrupted by Gwen Stacy slamming her tray on the table. Gwen is the resident Regina George of your college campus. You used to fly under her radar but ever since you started dating Miguel O'hara, the star quarterback, she has been relentless in her harassment.
"Hey piggy, I saw you sitting here so I brought you some food so you won't get hungry while you sit alone. I guess your "boyfriend" doesn't want to be seen in public with you," Regina mocks, gesturing to the tray she had slammed next to you. The plate has a heaping pile of bacon and sausage with at least ten pieces of toast on top.
"Gwen, fuck off. Just accept the fact that not every guy at this school is not up your ass," you retort. You pick up your tray and walk towards the trash can.
"Miguel is only dating you as a joke. No guy here would ever be into a whale like you." Gwen pushes you straight into the trash can that you had stopped in front of. The can tips over, spilling the morning's trash onto the floor. The room goes silent as your peers stop talking to look at you.
"Wow piggy, you're such a klutz," Gwen laughs, pointing at you. Your tray drops to the ground and you run out of the hall with all eyes on you.
The walk back to your dorm is one of shame and severe embarrassment. Tears start to spill down your face when you make it to your door. Your fingers fumble to open the stubborn door, but when it finally does you crash onto the couch and sob. Salvia dribbles down your mouth, mixing with your tears as you cry. Eventually the burn in your throat is enough to quiet you, but the evidence of your breakdown is still streaked across your face.
Your eyes are red and puffy with mascara smeared across your lids. The clock in your living room reads 10:40 am, making you 40 minutes late for your second class. You decide to skip the rest of your classes and spend the day wallowing in self-pity. A sigh leaves your chest as you peel yourself from the couch and pull out your phone from your pocket. Your lock screen is littered with worried messages from your boyfriend.
10:12 am: Hey babe are you coming to class???
10:30 am: Tell me if you're sick and I'll leave early
10:32 am: Seriamente text me just so I know you're okay!!
10:35 am: I got your homework for you btw
10:36 am: did I do something?
10:38 am: I'm coming over
You quickly type up a "I'm ok" message, but knowing your boyfriend he's probably already sprinting to your dorm. You rush to your bathroom to remove the smeared makeup from your face and fix your lopsided braided bun. Just as you finally get the last bit of mascara off your eyes someone knocks at the door. You give yourself a once over and head to the door. Your boyfriend stands in the doorway looking frazzled and out of breath with homework papers clenched in his hand.
"Why didn't you answer my texts?" Miguel asks as he steps into your dorm.
"I did, I was just taking a nap!" You exclaim trying to avoid his eyes.
"Mìrame. Why are your eyes so red? Did you smoke without me?" Miguel jokingly pouts his bottom lip as he grabs your face.
"No, I'm just not feeling good, baby. You can go, I'm just gonna skip class today."
Miguel's eyebrows knit together with skepticism. "Did Gwen talk shit to you again?"
What? No, I just want to stay in bed today!" Your voice starts to shake and a familiar throbbing runs down your throat. Despite this assurance, your eyes give you away.
"I'm so sick of that cabrona de mierda! I'm gonna have a word with her," Miguel turns to the door, ready to have yet another screaming match with Gwen.
"Miguel, please!" You plead, grabbing at his arm. "She talked shit but I'm fine now. I really don't want to think about it anymore and I really don't want to give her the satisfaction of knowing I go crying to you every time she calls me a pig. It's not like you can actually do anything to her anyways."
"How am I supposed to stick up for you then? I'm not gonna sit around and let her be a puta to my girlfriend," Miguel sighs, turning back around.
You both stand in silence, unable to think of any real solution. Miguel breaks the tension by wrapping his arms around you and pulling you into a hug.
"I'm sorry, baby," Miguel whispers in your ear. "I just want to help you." His hands rub gentle circles on your back. Miguel's warm breath tickles your ear causing you to smile ever so slightly.
"You can help me just by being an amazing, supportive boyfriend," you say. Miguel lifts his head and kisses you. His lips feel plush against yours.
The first kiss is delicate, barely grazing your lips, but the second is more passionate. Your fingers entangle themselves into Miguel's dark curls. They feel soft and perfectly wrap around your fingertips. You pull Miguel closer to your chest, practically merging your bodies together.
"I need you Miguel," you say breathlessly against his lips.
"I guess I could skip my next class," Miguel smirks, lifting up his shirt to reveal his perfectly toned stomach and wide shoulders.
Your cheeks blush at the sight of him in his full glory. Miguel doesn't hesitate to get naked unlike you. Your fingers shyly tug at your graphic tee before lifting it above your head. Natural instincts make your arms fly to cover as much of your body as you can.
"Babe, I've seen you naked three times, stop hiding yourself from me. I already know how sexy you look topless," Miguel says, pulling your arms away from your chest. He quickly unhooks your bra while pressing kisses to your bust.
You grab Miguel's arm and lead him to your bedroom. The room is small with only a twin bed and a desk sitting in the corners. Miguel gently pushes you onto the bed with a look of lust in his eyes. His fingers spread warmth to your body as they trail down your stomach to your aching mound. He teases your clothed pussy, slowly pressing deep circles onto your clit.
"Miguel," you moan. You tuck your bottom lip between your teeth as he continues his ministrations. Pleasure builds within your abdomen as Miguel's fingers move hastily against your cunt. His bicep flexes as his fingers push your panties to the side, giving your boyfriend a full view of your wet pussy.
"Is all this for me, baby?" Miguel teases as the pad of his thumb brushes over your exposed clit. The sudden skin-to-skin contact sends electricity up your spine.
"Only for you."
Your boyfriend's dark eyes are practically red with lust. He removes his hand from in between your legs, much to your dismay, and positions himself in between them. For the first time you notice his large bulge poking through the boxers he neglected to take off. Your brain barely registers his cock before he pushes inside you. A loud gasp escapes your lips as your pussy stretches around his girth.
"F-fuck!" you manage to stutter out. Miguel is gentle at first. His hips move smoothly like butter against your own. The initial pressure subsides and pleasure takes its place. Miguel plunges deep inside you, leaving you shaking with every thrust. Your thighs jiggle with the snap of his hips causing the room to fill with the sound of your skin slapping together.
"Jesus, you feel so fucking good!" Miguel exclaims. He quickens his pace to an impossible speed, eliciting pornographic moans from you. His shaft renders speechless as he effortly hits the sensitive spot in your pussy. Your hands quickly tangle in Miguel's hair as your orgasm nears.
"You like that, baby?" Miguel teases.
"Oh fuck! I love your fucking dick" Your words sputter out with each slam of your boyfriend's hips, but your message is clear.
"You love this fucking dick?" Miguel's ego grows larger by the second.
"I LOVE your fucking dick," you say practically screaming.
Your next sentence is interrupted by Miguel jackhammering into you with the last bit of energy he has. His fingers intertwine with yours as your orgasm rushes through your body. Your toes curl to the point of cracking as it makes its way down your legs. Miguel lets out a string of curses as he presses his head against your chest. A final grunt escapes his lips when he finishes inside of you.
His thighs tremble and his breath is shallow, eyes filled with a post-orgasm high as he lifts his head.
"I'll always choose you, baby," Miguel says breathlessly.
"I know," you reply back. You brush the wet curls out of your boyfriend's face knowing that even if Gwen bullied you, you still got the better end of the stick.
Your head hangs low as you eat your breakfast in the dining hall. The noise of the hall dulls your thoughts as you play with the runny eggs on your plate. That is quickly interrupted by Gwen Stacy slamming her tray on the table. Gwen is the resident Regina George of your college campus. You used to fly under her radar but ever since you started dating Miguel O'hara, the star quarterback, she has been relentless in her harassment. 
"Hey piggy, I saw you sitting here so I brought you some food so you won't get hungry while you sit alone. I guess your "boyfriend" doesn't want to be seen in public with you," Regina mocks, gesturing to the tray she had slammed next to you. The plate has a heaping pile of bacon and sausage with at least ten pieces of toast on top. 
"Gwen, fuck off. Just accept the fact that not every guy at this school is not up your ass," you retort. You pick up your tray and walk towards the trash can.
"Miguel is only dating you as a joke. No guy here would ever be into a whale like you." Gwen pushes you straight into the trash can that you had stopped in front of. The can tips over, spilling the morning's trash onto the floor. The room goes silent as your peers stop talking to look at you.
"Wow piggy, you're such a klutz," Gwen laughs, pointing at you. Your tray drops to the ground and you run out of the hall with all eyes on you.
The walk back to your dorm is one of shame and severe embarrassment. Tears start to spill down your face when you make it to your door. Your fingers fumble to open the stubborn door, but when it finally does you crash onto the couch and sob. Salvia dribbles down your mouth, mixing with your tears as you cry. Eventually the burn in your throat is enough to quiet you, but the evidence of your breakdown is still streaked across your face.
Your eyes are red and puffy with mascara smeared across your lids. The clock in your living room reads 10:40 am, making you 40 minutes late for your second class. You decide to skip the rest of your classes and spend the day wallowing in self-pity. A sigh leaves your chest as you peel yourself from the couch and pull out your phone from your pocket. Your lock screen is littered with worried messages from your boyfriend.
10:12 am: Hey babe are you coming to class???
10:30 am: Tell me if you're sick and I'll leave early
10:32 am: Seriamente text me just so I know you're okay!!
10:35 am: I got your homework for you btw
10:36 am: did I do something?
10:38 am: I'm coming over 
You quickly type up a "I'm ok" message, but knowing your boyfriend he's probably already sprinting to your dorm. You rush to your bathroom to remove the smeared makeup from your face and fix your lopsided braided bun. Just as you finally get the last bit of mascara off your eyes someone knocks at the door. You give yourself a once over and head to the door. Your boyfriend stands in the doorway looking frazzled and out of breath with homework papers clenched in his hand.
"Why didn't you answer my texts?" Miguel asks as he steps into your dorm.
"I did, I was just taking a nap!" You exclaim trying to avoid his eyes.  
"Mìrame. Why are your eyes so red? Did you smoke without me?" Miguel jokingly pouts his bottom lip as he grabs your face.
"No, I'm just not feeling good, baby. You can go, I'm just gonna skip class today."
Miguel's eyebrows knit together with skepticism. "Did Gwen talk shit to you again?" 
What? No, I just want to stay in bed today!" Your voice starts to shake and a familiar throbbing runs down your throat. Despite this assurance, your eyes give you away.
"I'm so sick of that cabrona de mierda! I'm gonna have a word with her," Miguel turns to the door, ready to have yet another screaming match with Gwen.
"Miguel, please!" You plead, grabbing at his arm. "She talked shit but I'm fine now. I really don't want to think about it anymore and I really don't want to give her the satisfaction of knowing I go crying to you every time she calls me a pig. It's not like you can actually do anything to her anyways."
"How am I supposed to stick up for you then? I'm not gonna sit around and let her be a puta to my girlfriend," Miguel sighs, turning back around. 
You both stand in silence, unable to think of any real solution. Miguel breaks the tension by wrapping his arms around you and pulling you into a hug. 
"I'm sorry, baby," Miguel whispers in your ear. "I just want to help you." His hands rub gentle circles on your back. Miguel's warm breath tickles your ear causing you to smile ever so slightly. 
"You can help me just by being an amazing, supportive boyfriend," you say. Miguel lifts his head and kisses you. His lips feel plush against yours. 
The first kiss is delicate, barely grazing your lips, but the second is more passionate. Your fingers entangle themselves into Miguel's dark curls. They feel soft and perfectly wrap around your fingertips. You pull Miguel closer to your chest, practically merging your bodies together.
"I need you Miguel," you say breathlessly against his lips. 
"I guess I could skip my next class," Miguel smirks, lifting up his shirt to reveal his perfectly toned stomach and wide shoulders. 
Your cheeks blush at the sight of him in his full glory. Miguel doesn't hesitate to get naked unlike you. Your fingers shyly tug at your graphic tee before lifting it above your head. Natural instincts make your arms fly to cover as much of your body as you can.
"Babe, I've seen you naked three times, stop hiding yourself from me. I already know how sexy you look topless," Miguel says, pulling your arms away from your chest. He quickly unhooks your bra while pressing kisses to your bust. 
You grab Miguel's arm and lead him to your bedroom. The room is small with only a twin bed and a desk sitting in the corners. Miguel gently pushes you onto the bed with a look of lust in his eyes. His fingers spread warmth to your body as they trail down your stomach to your aching mound. He teases your clothed pussy, slowly pressing deep circles onto your clit. 
"Miguel," you moan. You tuck your bottom lip between your teeth as he continues his ministrations. Pleasure builds within your abdomen as Miguel's fingers move hastily against your cunt. His bicep flexes as his fingers push your panties to the side, giving your boyfriend a full view of your wet pussy. 
"Is all this for me, baby?" Miguel teases as the pad of his thumb brushes over your exposed clit. The sudden skin-to-skin contact sends electricity up your spine. 
"Only for you."  
Your boyfriend's dark eyes are practically red with lust. He removes his hand from in between your legs, much to your dismay, and positions himself in between them. For the first time you notice his large bulge poking through the boxers he neglected to take off. Your brain barely registers his cock before he pushes inside you. A loud gasp escapes your lips as your pussy stretches around his girth.
"F-fuck!" you manage to stutter out. Miguel is gentle at first. His hips move smoothly like butter against your own. The initial pressure subsides and pleasure takes its place. Miguel plunges deep inside you, leaving you shaking with every thrust. Your thighs jiggle with the snap of his hips causing the room to fill with the sound of your skin slapping together.
"Jesus, you feel so fucking good!" Miguel exclaims. He quickens his pace to an impossible speed, eliciting pornographic moans from you. His shaft renders speechless as he effortly hits the sensitive spot in your pussy. Your hands quickly tangle in Miguel's hair as your orgasm nears.
"You like that, baby?" Miguel teases.
"Oh fuck! I love your fucking dick" Your words sputter out with each slam of your boyfriend's hips, but your message is clear.
"You love this fucking dick?" Miguel's ego grows larger by the second.
"I LOVE your fucking dick," you say practically screaming. 
Your next sentence is interrupted by Miguel jackhammering into you with the last bit of energy he has. His fingers intertwine with yours as your orgasm rushes through your body. Your toes curl to the point of cracking as it makes its way down your legs. Miguel lets out a string of curses as he presses his head against your chest. A final grunt escapes his lips when he finishes inside of you. 
His thighs tremble and his breath is shallow, eyes filled with a post-orgasm high as he lifts his head.
"I'll always choose you, baby," Miguel says breathlessly.
"I know," you reply back. You brush the wet curls out of your boyfriend's face knowing that even if Gwen bullied you, you still got the better end of the stick.
Taglist ****
@anoaievans
@lilvampirina
@vaexox
@hatterripper31
@aiyaaayei
@vipersecret-blog
@kelly-fushiguro345
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Art: @shuploc
412 notes · View notes
littlesubbyflower · 5 months
Text
Changing Locks
Toxic!Eddie Munson X AFAB!Reader
2.7K Words
TW: Angst, Toxic!Eddie, toxic relationship
A/N :: Hey y’all, here I am projecting again lmao. Enjoy! If you enjoyed, please like and reblog!
Divider by @saradika-graphics
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Everyone always assumed your relationship with Eddie Munson was perfect. Resident freak turned nice for the good girl, but it was far from what everyone in the halls at school or in the isles at the grocery store. 
Sure, everyone saw you two cozied up in the cafeteria, or his arm thrown over your shoulders in the hallways, or his hand on your thigh when he sat next to you in shared classes, but no one saw the explosive arguments, they never saw the death glares or the pleading and begging, only to be met with false promises and disappointment. 
You woke up today thinking that everything would be okay, that you would have a good day. 
Today, Eddie was supposed to spend the day with you, after a busy week of gigs and an afternoon's long D&D session from the day before. The day had been planned out last week, it consisted of breakfast at your favorite spot, a day drive to Indianapolis to check out this new record shop and to stop by your favorite bookstore, grab lunch if you felt like, before coming home to spend the remainder of your day watching movies together.
Except none of that happened. After you showered, dried your hair and applied makeup, you still hadn’t heard from Eddie. Which seemed a bit unusual but you shrugged it off at first. Maybe he was still sleeping, maybe his phone was dead, or a last minute thing with his Uncle Wayne came up. 
You knew he had a bad habit of getting distracted most times due to his unmedicated adult ADHD, so you were crossing your fingers in hopes it was just that. To pass the time, you pick up one of your comfort books while you wait for him to message or call you. Before opening the book, you glance at the time on your watch which read 9:36 am
Sighing deeply and opening the book, you begin reading.  
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After turning endless pages, tossing and turning to get comfortable, and a snack later, you close the novel, you glance at your watch again, this time, the time read 1:57 pm. 
Puzzled, you pick up your phone again to make sure you hadn’t missed any calls or messages and to your disdain, there were none. You decided to finally message Eddie.
You: Hey Eddie! I was just popping in to make sure that you were okay? Haven’t heard from you today and I’m starting to get worried. 
You press send, only to watch it go from ‘Delivered’  straight to ‘Read 1:58 PM’ Your heart pounded in your chest, hoping for some kind of reply, but it never came. Time ticked by for 15 agonizing minutes before you sent another message. 
You: We are still on for our plans today, right?
‘Delivered’ 
A nine letter word that has taunted you the last eight months of your relationship with Eddie. 
A nine letter word that has caused so many arguments, so many sleepless nights, and has seen so many empty promises and declarations to change, but they never happen. 
You roll your eyes and lock your phone, tossing it onto the bed next to you before looking up at the ceiling when the all too familiar feeling of tears starts pricking at your lash line. 
“This mascara is too expensive to cry off. This mascara is too expensive to cry off. This mascara is too expensive to cry off.” You repeat the mantra to yourself, fanning at your face with your hands. 
Closing your eyes and sighing deeply, you just sit, waiting for something. 
There’s a knock at your bedroom door. 
“ ‘s open.” You day in a monotone voice. 
“Steve, you said she was supposed to be out with Eddie!” Robin whisper shouted at the boy with her.
“I told you to check the circle before we even drove over here!” Steve whispered back. “We’re already here, might as well give it to her.” He says, grabbing the doorknob and opening the door slowly. 
Robin walked into your room first, carrying a gift bag adorned with ribbons and glittering tissue paper, quickly shuffling over to you, and extending her arms, thrusting the bag into your personal space before giving you her signature grin. 
“Happy birthday, gorgeous!” She nearly shouted. Steve walks into the room right behind her. “This is from Steve and I, obviously!” 
You take the gift out of her outstretched arms and smile meekly. “Birthday? It isn’t my birthday?” 
Steve scoffs. “Okay, sure. Your best friend only turns 19 once, so we got you something, and there’s nothing you can do about it.” 
You look between the two puzzled, before it dawns on you what today’s date was. They must’ve seen the realization on your face before they both looked panicked. 
“I thought you were supposed to be with Eddie today?” Robin asked, trying to change the subject.
“I was, he hasn’t been answering, and I figured he was just… busy?”
Steve excuses himself from the room and you set the gift down. 
Grabbing your phone again, dialing Eddie’s number this time instead of trying to text him, you waited for the line to ring, and it did, three times before someone said “Stop bothering us, we’re busy” and there was yelling in the background before hanging up. 
A white hot flash of pain flashes through your chest and your throat feels tight and like it’s wrapped in barbed wire. You look up at Robin in shock, her blue eyes looking back at you with the same expression. 
You try his number again, hand shaking while putting the phone on speaker, trying to catch your breath. The line rings twice before someone picks it up. 
“Hey! We’re kind of busy right now with a session? Everything okay?” Dustin Henderson speaks into the phone. 
“S-session? I thought that was yesterday..”
“Eddie said he didn’t have anything important to do today, so we just picked up where we left off.” The younger boy confirmed. ‘Henderson, come ON, hang up the phone!’ someone shouted. ‘Wait, I’m talking to—’ ‘We know! She’s been blowing my shit up all day, I don’t care what she has to say, hang up and come back and finish this game!’ 
You heard Dustin sigh into the phone before speaking. “Well, I guess I should go… I’ll tell Eddie you called. Oh! Happy birthday, by the way!” He said before hanging up. 
The air feels like it’s been knocked out of your lungs. Suddenly, it’s like you’ve forgotten how to breathe. The air feels sticky and heavy, and the room starts spinning. 
Is this what betrayal feels like? Is this what having your heart ripped out of your chest feels like? You drop your head to look into your lap. 
This doesn’t feel real, it’s all a horrible dream and you’re going to wake up soon and it’ll all just be a dream.  Pinching your arm, realizing it wasn’t a dream, a sob escaped your throat and tears began falling, makeup be damned. 
You shouldn’t be surprised, but part of you is. Eddie promised you would spend today together. Weeks of rain checks and forgotten plans were supposed to be made up today. 
He didn't care what you had to say? The statement and the thought alone made your chest ache. 
You shake your head and let the tears fall freely now. Not only had your boyfriend lied to you, he broke several promises and now didn’t care about what you had to say? 
Robin sits next to you on your bed, pulling you into an awkward hug with her long limbs. 
Steve peeks back into the room through the cracked door and sees Robin’s arms wrapped around you as your shoulders rise and fall with the body wracking sobs coming from your chest. The gift the duo had gotten you was quickly forgotten about.
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After Robin and Steve had gotten you calmed down, they had convinced you to let them treat you for a milkshake at least. 
“I know it’s not your favorite Italian place, but I can't just leave you at home to cry that way over him, honey.” Steve said, reaching his hand across the table to place it comfortingly across yours while Robin ordered a basket of fries and three different milkshakes. “Things haven’t been okay for a while, have they?” 
You slowly look up at Steve, shaking your head before you drop your eyes back to the table. 
“Why haven’t you come to one of us? You know that we’re always here for you.” Robin spoke as she slid into the booth next to Steve, dropping the basket of fries onto the table and sliding your milkshake glass to you, propping a foot up next to your thigh in the seat next to you, a comforting action, giving you space, but still touching you. 
“I just… wanted to handle everything on my own.” You sniffed out. “I—”
You’re cut off by the voice of Dustin and Lucas arguing over a piece of the campaign with Mike and Will trailing and talking over each other, Eddie, Gareth, Jeff and Doug following behind them. You sink lower into the booth, not wanting to be seen, which almost works. Jeff and Gareth wave to you as they go to their usual back corner booth and politely, you wave back. 
Steve gently clears his throat. “I can’t just… sit and watch you cry over him.” He gives your hand a reassuring squeeze and continues. “What’s been going on? Summarize and paraphrase if you have to.” 
“Oh gosh Steve,” you say sarcastically. “Hmm, where do I start? The lying? The broken promises or the declarations to change? Him blatantly ignoring me? The gaslighting? The manipulation? Or the fact that I know what he’s doing and I’m still stupid enough to hold on to that tiny sliver of hope that he’s actually going to do what he says?” You question, bringing your hands up to face to cover your eyes. 
Robin and Steve share a look. “If he’s hurting you this much, I see no point in staying.” Robin says carefully, shoving a few fries into her mouth and chewing. “It’s hurting you more to hold onto the broken pieces when all you need to do is just… let go.” 
“A-and I know that’s easier said than done, believe me.” Steve pipes up next. “This all has to be on your terms, honey. We can’t do this for you.” 
“I wish you could. Knowing myself, I would take it all back almost instantly. I would say how I didn't mean it, and that I’m the one who’s sorry.” You start crying into your hands. “Steve, what do they have that I don’t? Why can’t he just… pick me? What hobbies do I need to pick up? What things do I need to go out and buy for him to just want to be with me?” You cry harder, hiding your face in your hands. 
Steve nods and Robin slides out of the booth, allowing Steve to switch sides, pulling you into a protective hug as best as he could. Robin sits back down as Dustin leaves the hellfire table and slides in next to Robin, shoving a few fries into his mouth as he takes in the scene in front of him. 
“Henderson, get back over here!” Eddie called clear across the restaurant. Dustin’s eyes move back and forth between the Hellfire group and the sad scene happening right here. He silently gets up and goes back to the table where Eddie and the rest of the group was sitting. 
You hated this, it felt as if Eddie was forcing the younger boys to pick a side and that he may be holding their spots in the Hellfire Club over their heads. Taking a deep breath and uncovering your face, you slide your milkshake towards the center of the table. 
“Steve, can you take me back home?” You asked quietly. 
“Yeah, absolutely.” He said gently, unwrapping his arms from around you and slid out of the booth. He digs his wallet out and hands a $20 bill to Robin. 
“Meet you in the car, Robbie.” He says, holding his hand out to you so he can take you to the car. 
Robin thinks to herself for a moment, weighing the options out in her head. She could pay for their barely touched fries and wasted shakes and just leave, or she could give Eddie Munson a piece of her mind. She decides that the consequences might be worth it. She pays the meal ticket and grabs your untouched milkshake, making a beeline straight for the Hellfire table. 
Dustin and Lucas watch with wide eyes, Mike stops talking and turns to see the older girl stop right behind Eddie’s chair. 
“So Eddie, let me get this straight… not only have you been playing with my best friend’s feelings and breaking her heart, we’re suddenly ignoring birthdays and talking to people like they’re pieces of shit too?” Robin scoffs, Eddie completely turning around in his chair to look at her in shock. “Your girlfriend only turns 19 once and I refuse to let her sit and cry over.. over a worn out mophead like you!” Robin’s hands are shaking in anger. “You fumbled the best girl that has ever happened to you, and it’ll be such. sweet. revenge. seeing her with…” She trails off and smirks. “I’ll just save that for the polaroids.” 
Steve watches the scene unfold through the window of the diner while everyone inside watches with their jaws slack, not daring to speak up or even move to diffuse the situation. Steve knew Robin was a bit unpredictable so he decided to let her handle this her own way. 
Time slowed as Eddie tried to weakly defend himself, but the girl had already made up her mind. Robin took your untouched strawberry milkshake and dumped the entire cup over his head, its sugary contents streaking down his curls making them clump together and staining the white part of his shirt with streaks of red and pink. 
“By the way, your relationship with her, it’s. done. If I even see you so much as breathe in her direction, you’ll get more than a fucking milkshake over your head, got it?” 
The table’s collective gasps and Robin’s heavy breathing can be heard throughout the diner before she slams the cup down and stalks off, slinging the door open and stomping off to Steve’s car. 
Steve opens his mouth to say something, but Robin holds her hand up to silence him. 
“Do not start with me, Harrington.” Robin says. “Let’s just get her home.” 
Climbing into the back seat with you so you aren’t alone, Robin places her hand on your thigh in a comforting manner. 
“You didn’t have to dump the entire milkshake on him, Robbie.” You mumble quietly, leaning your head on her shoulder. “I’m glad you did though.” 
“Someone needs to put that asshole in his place, and Steve would’ve beaten him to a pulp… the milkshake was the next best thing.” 
“I still might.” Steve says, turning on the car and putting it into reverse and pulling out of the parking spot. “I’m debating.”
“I uh, also told him that your relationship is done. That was probably just a heat of the moment thing, but babe I cannot just-- just sit back and watch you cry over him like this.” Robin rambles, running her free hand up and down your side soothingly. 
“I know.” You mumble out. 
A silence falls over the car from the diner to your driveway, the occasional sound heard was a sniffle or two from you. 
Steve puts his car in park before turning around to look at you. 
“Are you going to be alright by yourself tonight?” He asks and you shrug. “We could stay if you wanted?” 
You shrug again. Robin and Steve share a look. “If you need us, you can always call.” Robin says. 
“Actually… Steve, you know how to change locks, right?” 
“Yeah I do, why?” 
You sit up a little straighter and take a deep breath. 
“I think I'm ready to find my inner peace, and it’ll start by changing the locks.” 
Steve looked at you and nodded. 
“Yeah honey, I’ll change the locks for you.”
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Thanks for reading!! likes and reblogs are always appreciated!!
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antimony-medusa · 5 months
Text
MCYT on Ao3 — January '24
The state of MCYT on Ao3, just for fun. Yes I do this every month, I like numbers. This time the period we're covering will include many holiday exchanges, so I'm excited to see if that's represented!
The Cube SMP (8 works)
Slamacow Minecraft Animations (Web Series) (10 works)
iDots SMP (23 works)
30 Day SMP | Free Trial SMP (27 works)
Legacy SMP (28 works)
Cogchamp SMP (29 works)
Content SMP (30 works)
Epic SMP (32 works)
Art of Survival SMP (36 works)
Dominion SMP (38 works)
Shady Oaks SMP (49 works)
X Life SMP (51 works)
100 Hours Hardcore SMP (54 works)
IvoryCello's Prison Escapes (Web Series) (56 works)
Bear SMP (60 works)
SadSMP (66 works)
My Inner Demons - Aphmau (Web Series) (67 works)
Mer SMP (82 works)
Area Unknown SMP (89 works)
Kaboodle SMP (91 works)
Tortillaland SMP (115 works)
House Builder Gang SMP | HBG SMP (135 works)
New Life SMP (169 works)
Slimecicle Cinematic Universe (Web Series) (174 works)
WitchCraft SMP (182 works)
Pirates SMP (213 works)
Rats SMP (234 works)
SMPLive (295 works)
SMPEarth (304 works)
Mianite (Web Series) (379 works)
Outsiders SMP (393 works)
Afterlife SMP (395 works)
MindCrack RPF (504 works)
MyStreet - Aphmau (Web Series) (543 works)
Evolution SMP (693 works)
Minecraft: Story Mode (Video Game) (824 works)
Karmaland SMP (842 works)
Fable SMP (1,012 works)
Lifesteal SMP (1,546 works)
Origins SMP (1575 works)
The Yogscast (3,215 works)
Empires SMP (6,408 works)
QSMP | Quackity SMP (7,375 works)
3rd Life | Last Life SMP Series (10,336 works)
Hermitcraft SMP (20,093 works)
Dream SMP (85,051 works)
Minecraft (Video Game) (110,119 works)
Video Blogging RPF (279,422 works)
Some notes:
No new tags that I saw this month, though as always I could have missed something! As you can see, we already have quite the assortment of canonized tags.
Fics are still primarily in english, but we have three exceptions with significant spanish fics. Karmaland (740 of 842 are in spanish, from 731 last month), Tortillaland (110 of 115 are in spanish, the same as last month), and QSMP (752 of 7,375 are in spanish, from 668 last month.)
QSMP also shows 39 fics in French, up from 30 last month, and 405 in Brasilian Portugese, up from 375 last month. While I did not check every language this month, I checked on the languages I knew had a fic in QSMP and we see 1 fic in ASL (probably a misclick as it appears to be in english), 1 fic in Bahasa Malaysia, 1 fic in German, 1 fic in Esperanto, 1 fic in Filipino, 5 works in European Portugese, 5 fics in Русский (Russian), 1 fic in Suomi (Finnish), 1 fic in Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese), and 3 fics in 中文-普通话 國語 (Mandarin Chinese, I believe), all the same as last month. New is two fics in Polski (Polish), one fic in Svenska (Swedish), and one fic in Dansk (Danish).
In the small and micro fandoms (under 200 fics), some of the most active small fandoms have grown out of this category so we only saw small amounts of growth. The standout fandoms all saw an increase of 6 works, and that was a tie between Content SMP, New Life SMP, and Witchcraft SMP. Note that Content SMP was coming up from only 24 works, so 6 new works is an increase of 25% of the fandom, truly impressive.
In the midsize fandoms (200-1000), Fable SMP has broken that 1000-fic mark and can no longer qualify for our standout fandom! Instead, our most active fandom was Evolution SMP, with 33 new works, followed by Mystreet with 20 fics and Minecraft: Story Mode with 24 fics. Mystreet and Story Mode are both new fandoms so it's unclear whether that's people retagging old work or true new fics.
For the post-canon big fandoms: Empires went up by 178 works, singificantly more than last month's 117, but not beating the previous month's 240, and Dream SMP's increase of 918 beat the previous month's 767, but is still only the second time I've seen this fandom fall under a thousand works plus a month. Hermitcraft is between seasons right now, but still experienced that holiday exchange boost, as its increase of 784 beat both last month's 574 and the previous month's 651. For active fandoms, traffic series posted a staggering 831 fics, which is its highest ever number, beating April 2023's 671 fics. QSMP saw 865 fics, which is part of a three month decline (894 last month, 913 the month before), but still posting numbers that are only exceeded by DSMP.
Overall, the number of fics posted under Video Blogging-RPF (the umbrella fandom that contains all MCYT) is 4,223 fics, a significant increase from last month's 3,489, and the previous month's 4,035, but still exceeded by October's record 4,702. Notably, it's higher than the summer numbers and almost exactly the same as the number we saw last January, 4,235 new works.
Detailed breakdown under the cut
The Cube SMP (8 works, 8 last month, 0-fic increase)
Slamacow Minecraft Animations (Web Series) (10 works, 10 last month, 0-fic increase)
iDots SMP (23 works, 22 last month, 1-fic increase)
30 Day SMP | Free Trial SMP (27 works, 27 last month, 0-fic increase)
Legacy SMP (28 works, 28 last month, 0-fic increase)
Cogchamp SMP (29 works, 29 last month, 0-fic increase)
Content SMP (30 works, 24 last month, 6-fic increase)
Epic SMP (32 works, 32 last month, 0-fic increase)
Art of Survival SMP (36 works, 36 last month, 0-fic increase)
Dominion SMP (38 works, 33 last month, 5-fic increase)
Shady Oaks SMP (49 works, 47 last month, 2-fic increase)
X Life SMP (51 works, 50 last month, 1-fic increase)
100 Hours Hardcore SMP (54 works, 54 last month, 0-fic increase)
IvoryCello's Prison Escapes (Web Series) (56 works, 54 last month, 2-fic increase)
Bear SMP (60 works, 59 last month, 1-fic increase)
SadSMP (66 works, 66 last month, 0-fic increase)
My Inner Demons - Aphmau (Web Series) (67 works, 64 last month, 3-fic increase)
Mer SMP (82 works, 80 last month, 2-fic increase)
Area Unknown SMP (89 works, 87 last month, 2-fic increase)
Kaboodle SMP (91 works, 87 last month, 4-fic increase)
Tortillaland SMP (115 works, 115 last month, 0-fic increase)
House Builder Gang SMP | HBG SMP (135 works, 134 last month, 1-fic increase)
New Life SMP (169 works, 163 last month, 6-fic increase)
Slimecicle Cinematic Universe (Web Series) (174 works, 169 last month, 5-fic increase)
WitchCraft SMP (182 works, 176 last month, 6-fic increase)
Pirates SMP (213 works, 195 last month, 18-fic increase)
Rats SMP (234 works, 229 last month, 5-fic increase)
SMPLive (295 works, 286 last month, 9-fic increase)
SMPEarth (304 works, 289 last month, 15-fic increase)
Mianite (Web Series) (379 works, 373 last month, 6-fic increase)
Outsiders SMP (393 works, 374 last month, 19-fic increase)
Afterlife SMP (395 works, 390 last month, 5-fic increase)
MindCrack RPF (504 works, 503 last month, 1-fic increase)
MyStreet - Aphmau (Web Series) (543 works, 523 last month, 20-fic increase)
Evolution SMP (693 works, 660 last month, 33-fic increase)
Minecraft: Story Mode (Video Game) (824 works, 800 last month, 24-fic increase)
Karmaland SMP (842 works, 824 last month, 18-fic increase)
Fable SMP (1,012 works, 945 last month, 67-fic increase)
Lifesteal SMP (1,546 works, 1,461 last month, 85-fic increase)
Origins SMP (1,575 works, 1,541 last month, 34-fic increase)
The Yogscast (3,215 works, 3,213 last month, 2-fic increase)
Empires SMP (6,408 works, 6,230 last month, 178-fic increase)
QSMP | Quackity SMP (7,375 works, 6,510 last month, 865-fic increase)
3rd Life | Last Life SMP Series (10,336 works, 9,505 last month, 831-fic increase)
Hermitcraft SMP (20,093 works, 19,309 last month, 784-fic increase)
Dream SMP (85,051 works, 918-fic increase)
Minecraft (Video Game) (110,119 works, 438-fic increase)
Video Blogging RPF (279,422 works, 4223-fic increase)
192 notes · View notes
die-pink-maus · 5 months
Text
A Weekend in Vienna 🇦🇹
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While vacationing in Germany, Chantelle’s (OC) best friend, Adrian (also an OC), books an impromptu trip to Vienna to visit extended family. Chantelle decides to join her for the last few days of her trip, where she meets an interesting friend of Adrian’s family who offers to show the two around the city for the weekend🤭
TW: Pretty much none, not for this chapter anyway, but things will get 🌶️spicy🌶️ in the next parts. Also there is an age gap between OC and König, she is 25 and he is about 36-37.
CW: FemOCs, female pronouns used, while both characters are technically OCs please feel free to imagine them however you’d like, ultimately the main character is the reader, I just didn’t want to use “Y/N” so I gave them names 🙈
Word Count: 1,516
*DISCLAIMER*
This is my first time EVER writing any kind of fan fiction so please go easy on me 😭 if you like where things are going, likes and reblogs would be greatly appreciated! If you’d like to see anything in particular in the next part or part(s), I’d love to hear it!
This version of König is based on the above interpretation drawn by @lettaniko (I hope you don’t mind me using it! I absolutely love this drawing it’s perfect! 🫶🏼)
I like a nice build up to the smut so if you like to get right into it this is probably not going to be for you…but if you can wait I it out I promise it’ll be worth it 😂
Enjoy! 💋
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7:30am. There’s approximately 30 minutes before my train departs for Vienna, and I still haven’t reached the train station yet. I scrambled as I dashed out of my hotel room, hoping I’d left the place in a somewhat decent state and I hadn’t forgotten anything valuable as got into the elevator. I’ve been exploring Munich for the past two weeks and I’ve been having the absolute time of my life. Although traveling alone can be quite scary, oddly enough, I’ve never felt more at home. Munich is such a vibrant city, filled with all kinds of exciting things to do and I’ve met so many incredible people, it’s definitely been the experience of a lifetime. To say that I am not looking forward to going back home to Vancouver would be an understatement, but all good things must come to an end. I’d spent about a year and a half learning to speak German, and promised myself that I would plan a trip in celebration of achieving fluency, so here I am! Now, Vienna wasn’t initially on my list of places to visit when I decided to come to Germany, but my best friend, Adrian, ended up booking a spur of the moment flight last week to visit extended family in Austria and suggested I come hangout with her during the last few days of my trip. Seeing as its only a 3-4hr train ride from Munich, I figured why the hell not! I’ve heard Vienna is beautiful, and Im at all not opposed to exploring another city.
Upon arrival at the train station in Vienna I was greeted by Arian, excitedly jumping up and down while holding up a large white sign that read “Willkommen in Wien, Schlampe!” I rolled my eyes and shook my head, laughing as I got off the train and ran over to her, tackling her in a tight embrace as she laughed hysterically. “Did you have to let the whole station know that I’m a bitch or…?”
“Honestly, they should’ve known the moment they saw you.” She said jokingly. “How was the ride over?” She asked.
“Amazing, I haven’t slept that well in years. It also didn’t feel like a 4 hour train ride.”
“Trains in out here are quite quick so I wouldn’t be surprised if it somehow took less time. They definitely shit on the ones we have back home.”
“Oh for sure.” I agreed as we began walking over to the car.
“So a family friend of ours just came back from a mission in the states, he’s in the military bee tee dubs —“
“Yeah kinda pieced that together when you said ‘mission’.” I chuckled.
“I don’t drive out here so he’s gonna give us a ride back to my aunts, cool?”
“Sounds good.”
“He’s also a lot more familiar with Vienna than I am, so he offered to show us around a bit later on this evening.” Aw how nice of him. Knowing Adrian, the first place she’ll want to be taken to is the nearest bar, that girl can drink! If there’s one thing I’ve learned from my time in Germany, and my 10 years of friendship with Adrian, it’s that Europeans love their liquor. There are people from all parts of Europe in Germany and that’s one thing that remains quite consistent across the board. I also love my liquor, which is probably why I ended up fitting in so well.
We finally arrived at the car and opened the trunk to begin loading all of my luggage inside. I’d brought a small carryon suitcase, a duffle bag, as well as a large suitcase that was full of clothes I’d over packed from home, and a bunch of other clothes and souvenirs I’d bought in Munich. “Okay this one’s gonna be a tad heavy.” I warned as Adrian grabbed hold of the handle on the top. I reached forward to try to help her lift, but neither of us could manage the weight. “I got it.” His voice was low, but gentle. He had an accent, but it wasn’t overwhelming or harsh, nor did it make anything he said hard to understand. I wasn’t expecting to see the person I saw when I’d finally caught a glimpse of him…I don’t think I’ve ever seen a man like this in my entire life. Adrian and I stepped back as he grabbed hold of the suitcase, lifting it with absolute ease, as if it were light as a feather. His arm muscles bulged within the confines of his olive green long sleeved shirt as he tossed the suitcase inside the trunk. My heart began to race, It felt as if I was watching him move in slow motion. “Easy peasy.” He smirked as he turned around and looked down at me, his dazzling dark blue eyes awash with amusement at Adrian and I’s prior struggle. Jesus Christ…This man is an absolute unit. He’s gotta be at least 6 foot 7, if not taller. He’s incredibly easy on the eyes in a rough and rugged kinda way — a nice low trimmed beard, medium length dark brown hair, and a smile that is captivatingly dangerous to say the least. His presence alone exudes a confidence that causes me to grow weak in the knees. “I’m König,” he smiled knowingly as he stretched his hand out towards me. I know I’m definitely not the first woman to look at him the way I am. Even though I’m trying to keep my composure, it’s very clear that he can see right through it. “And you must be Chantelle?” He asked, eyes slowly roaming about my frame from head to toe. He bites his lip slightly as they return to my gaze, suggesting so much without saying any words at all. “I — yes.” I blushed, sheepishly brushing my hair behind my ear as I shook his hand. “Nice to meet you.” He said. “Oh yeah, König Chantelle, Chantelle König.” Adrian yelled from the backseat. He laughed and shook his head as he closed the trunk.
We arrived at Adrian’s aunts house about 45 minutes later. König helped us load all of my things into the foyer before letting us know he’d be coming back in a few hours to take us out to this bar that he and a few of his buddies on his task force frequent whenever they’re home. I’ve been thinking about him ever since he left — those mysterious blue eyes, the way he slightly bites his lower lip just before laughing at something ridiculous Adrian has said, the way his arm muscles swell beneath his shirt with the slightest movement…God, he’s sexy. I could think of a million different ways I’d want him to ruin me. The thought alone of being trapped beneath his large brawny frame writhing in pleasure as he thrusts into me over and over has me clenching around nothing. Though I’m not usually one for a one time fling, I have a feeling he’d be able to convince me. “So, you wanna tell me what all of that was about?” Adrian asked as she helped me settle into the guest room. “What are you talking about?” I asked. “Since when are you a shy girl?” She giggled. Sigh. I figured she was referencing my unusual silence during the car ride over here. “He’s hot as fuck but I’ve never seen you like that before.”
“Ugh!” I groaned as I covered my face with a pillow. She’s right. I’m not very easily intimidated. I’m quite the confident woman and I ensure everyone in the room knows it, but this was different. Almost as if our energies were fighting for dominance, and mine didn’t stand a chance. “Hey if it’s any consolation, my jaw dropped the first time I saw him without his mask too.” Mask?
“Mask?” I asked.
“Yes…the last time I was here he was on base training recruits, so I’d see him often in full tactical gear. He’s a snipper, so he wears a mask to hide his face in the field. I mean, that was hot too, but in a Ghostface kinda way”
I couldn’t help but laugh at the comparison, but I was curious to see what his entire ensemble looked like. “How old is he?” I asked.
“I think he’s in his mid to late 30s? I’m honestly not too sure, and it doesn’t matter to me either way.” She winked. “I was sensing some unspoken vibes between the two of you in the car though. Don’t think I didn’t see both of you stealing glances at each other every now and then.” She smirked.
“Stop,” I scoffed. “A man like that is definitely not single, and even if he is…I don’t know” I blushed. “I didn’t see him looking at me..”
“K well I see everything, he definitely likes what he sees, and clearly the feeling is mutual on your end as well. Looks like tonight will be interesting.”
“Nothing’s gonna happen, Adrian.” I laughed as I rolled my eyes. Nothing’s gonna happen…right?
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PART II 👉🏽 A Weekend In Vienna 🇦🇹: PART II
PART III 👉🏽 A Weekend In Vienna 🇦🇹: PART III
169 notes · View notes
Note
hi there! picture #3 fluff :)
Finally had some time to write more of these! Thank you for your request and mostly your patience 💖 Some husband and dad Harry for you!
Warnings: just birth talk and pregnancy talk!
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It was nearing 2am when one of the stronger contractions you'd been having assailed you right as you were about to doze off. You bit your lip as to not make too much noise and wake Harry. You were jealous as you glanced over to see Harry blissfully zonked out while you struggled to get any rest from your size and pain. Your back had been killing you for a few days now, but it was just getting progressively worse and nothing had been helping to ease your discomfort throughout the evening. And you were well aware that this was an indicator that you'd be giving birth soon given the contractions you'd been experiencing since the morning, but they were too far apart to make you go to the hospital, you'd been tracking them carefully with Anne. But this one that had just made you grit your teeth had been nothing like the ones you'd been feeling throughout the day. You were tense as the pain radiated down your legs even and when it passed you carefully got out of bed as to not disturb Harry.
You just needed to walk it off, so you migrated down to the kitchen because the pain had made you a bit queasy and you wanted to make yourself a bit of ginger tea to help relieve the icky feeling. You waited a few minutes for your tea to cool some before you indulged in it. You never liked the taste of ginger tea, or ginger in general but you knew that you would have a stronger dislike for it now as you quickly set your mug down and clung to the kitchen counter, exhaling slowly as a particularly strong cramp hit you. You literally whimpered as this one seemed to last a bit longer than the one that had made you get out of bed.
"Darling, just exhale slowly." you heard Anne's soothing voice and saw her slipper-clad feet off to the side as her warm hand rubbed over your back. You nodded, assuring her that you'd heard her and did as she said. After a couple moments the pain had subsided enough that you could straighten up again and she smiled softly at you, "S'that the first bad one?" she asked you.
"Second." you said, full back to normal now and you reached for your tea again and had a sip before you glanced to the time on the microwave, "First one was at 1:36." you informed, "So like...a little bit over 10 minutes ago?" you said.
"This is your first one 10 minutes apart?" she asked and you nodded.
"Oh, you're getting close! Should I call your mum to be ready just in case?" she asked and you nodded to confirm.
"Please." you said and she nodded and hurried off to the guest bedroom to make the call. You knew that she wouldn't leave you alone, so you made her some tea as well and she thanked you when she returned.
"Read my mind!" she said with a small smile, "How're you feeling about this all?" Anne asked you and you bit your lip before answering.
"Honestly, all of the excitement is kind of gone now..." you sighed softly, "Like it's more fear or nerves that something will go wrong or like how much more is this going to hurt? There's...regret." you said honestly, feeling so guilty as you confessed it, "Like obviously, I'm happy we're having a baby and I don't regret the baby, but like, what if I'm not ready to be a good mom yet? Like regret in that sense, of like maybe we rushed this?" Anne nodded as she listened, there wasn't any judgement on her face at all.
"I'm not going to lie to you and tell you that it'll be easy. And I'm not just talking about the birthing... if I'm being honest that's the easy part." she said with a small smile and you smiled as well, "But you're ready." She encouraged you as she tucked your hair behind your ear, "H is ready." she said and you nodded.
"He's been ready." you said softly and Anne nodded with a chuckle.
"You know, he called me after your first date and he said that he thought you were the one." she said and you looked to her with some surprise.
"After the first date?" you asked and she nodded, "Did he tell you it was just shy of a disaster?" you asked with a smile.
"He alluded to it...tell me." she said and you shook your head with a chuckle as you remembered it.
"He was nearly 20 minutes late." you shared with a small smile, "Being who he is, they still seated us, even though the staff thought that I had just used his name to get a good table." you explained and Anne chuckled, "When he finally showed up he looked completely worn out, I guess it'd been quite a long day at the studio." you recalled, "And ummm...then I asked him for a meal recommendation since he'd picked the place and then he told me that he had never even eaten there before, he'd seen a video on instagram apparently and thought the place looked cool." you recalled, "That's when I really just wanted to get up and leave." you said and Anne groaned with a shake of her head. "Like...I didn't want to be rude, even though it feel poorly planned and a bit haphazard, you know? The friend who had set us up had really been plotting this for a long time and I kept rejecting the idea because I just felt like we wouldn't be a good fit. So I stuck it out just to prove to my friend that I was right." you explained to Anne with a grin, "When we were leaving he shook my hand and said it was lovely to meet me and just walked the other way. I was livid and was literally looking up my friend's contact as I stormed over to my car and suddenly he was calling me and when I picked up he asked me for a ride "home". He forgot that he hadn't driven there." you shared and Anne shook her head.
"Seriously?"
"Seriously! I felt bad so I just said yes and picked him up out front and he gave me an address and it was to the studio, not his house." you said "And there was an accident or something, but there was plenty of traffic and he dozed off on me in the car. I had to wake him up when we arrived. I literally wanted to cry, like I felt humiliated and like maybe my friend secretly hated me." you said and Anne frowned as you told your side of the events, "I told my friend that if he said anything to just let him know that I wasn't interested in anything with him." you said with a small smile now, "And one night, a week or so later, he showed up at my place with flowers and this crazy story about how one of his friends had made a mushroom infused tea and he didn't know about it until he'd had a mug. No one warned him that it was laced or anything because they didn't know he had a date and whatever. And even high, he didn’t want to cancel because he really wanted to be there and he knew I was hesitant to begin with. So he thought if he cancelled last minute I just wouldn’t give him another shot. Which I mean…he was right about that.” you said through a chuckle and Anne was grinning and shaking her head.
"And uh, he apologized profusely and he completely understood that I wanted nothing to do with him, but he at least wanted to explain himself and apologize for his behavior and the really shitty date in person. He also apologized for waiting so long, but that he was absolutely mortified and needed to build the courage to come talk to me." you said, "And ummm... I don't know, I liked that he went out of his way to apologize. Most people would just call or text, you know? And so before he left I asked him if he wanted to stay for dinner and he accepted, and ate the food, even though it wasn't vegetarian...I didn't know at the time." you explained and Anne smiled, "And ummm...well the rest is history."
"Well yeah, he definitely left all of that out." Anne said and you laughed softly and then your smile disappeared as you hissed as another contraction came and then after a few moments it faded again, "He told me that you had been so kind, patient, and understanding with him the whole time. He said that you had a lovely smile and that there was just something about you. Now I'm thinking he imagined the whole thing..." Anne joked and you laughed along with her. And she was helping you feel better and then you remembered something.
"Oh, we were supposed to be recording this whole thing. Lloyd wanted to make a little thing for us from our footage!" you recalled.
"Such a sweet lad." Anne cooed at the mention of him and you smiled and nodded.
"He really is." you pouted with endearment. "The camera's in the go bag by the door." you said and Anne rushed off to get it. She had managed to get it on and had returned already recording.
"I think I've done it." she said and you nodded, the little red light up front indicating that she was in fact recording. "So tell us, what's going on?"
"Well it's... 2am and your father, Harry is completely knocked out, sleeping like a log...I am having thee contractions now." you said to the camera, "Felt gross so I made some ginger tea and now...oh....another's coming." you winced a bit and your smile faded.
"Breathe, love. Just breathe."
"Ahhh...." you whimpered and tried to relax your body as much as possible, but it was not happening, "OK, I think it's time to wake your dad up so that he has time to freak out and get dressed." you said to the camera and Anne smiled and Anne stopped the recording, "Let me take this from you," you said and she haded over the camera.
"Do you need help getting up the stairs?"
"No, I think I can do it. I'll shout for Harry if I get stuck." you said with a smile and she giggled.
"Alright." she looked at you a bit skeptically, but she didn't want to push you, it was important that you felt confident and capable as you went into this final stage of carrying your baby.
"I insist. Go ahead and take a shower, get dressed, you might not be able to in a few days." you reminded and she nodded, that much was true.
"Alright, I'll text your mum an update." she said and you thanked her before you waddled on up.
You quietly made your way into your shared bedroom with Harry, the light from the hallway helped you to see him already sitting up and rubbing his eyes.
"Where'd you go?" he asked lowly and you zoomed in on his face as he glanced towards you.
"To make some tea, was feeling nauseous." you explained and he hummed. "S'almost time, daddy." you said and his eyes widened a bit.
"Wait, seriously?" he asked, suddenly more alert and you nodded and shut off the camera before waddling over to his side of the bed. You set the camera down as he leaned closer and held the sides of your belly and kissed the top of it.
"The contractions are about ten minutes apart, s'been almost an hour of that." you informed him and he hummed, "Should probably hop in the shower." you said and he nodded.
"Want help?" he asked and you shook your head.
"S'alright, I think I just need a little mental preparation." you said and he nodded in understanding.
"OK, I'll get everything in the car. S'mum up?"
"Yeah, she's having a shower." you smiled as you played with the longer curls at the top of his head.
"I think she's a girl." Harry said and smiled up at you, "I don't know, I just feel it." he hummed and you smiled.
"I think so too." you confessed and he was beaming. He wasn't so much worried about you, he was just really eager to meet your baby girl. He knew that you were a bit scared, you'd been expressing it to him several times over the last couple weeks, but he also knew that you were strong and that you'd do a great job delivering your baby.
"I love you." he said to you.
"I love you." you responded, "Alright, let's get going." you said and he nodded. You straighten out the bed a bit as Harry got his robe on then rushed down to get the car loaded. You had showered and now were laying your outfit out on the bed when the next contraction came. "Oh fuck..." you winced as this one seemed to hit a little harder.
"Oh, baby." Harry came up beside you and grabbed your hand. You squeezed it tight as the pain radiated from your lower back all the way down your legs. You were trying to breathe through it as Anne had instructed earlier. Harry's other hand came to your back, where you'd been saying was sore and he rubbed with some pressure, hoping that he was helping in some way. He kissed your wet hair and your exhaled shakily as the pain started to subside. "I wish there was more I could do." he said softly as you relaxed now that the pain had mostly gone.
"Think you did enough." you said with a slightly pained smile and he shook his head and chuckled at your little joke. "Alright, get washed up! you reminded and he nodded and kissed your lips before hurrying into the bathroom. He hopped in the shower quickly as you got dressed, it did take a bit longer now that moving was hard. Then you checked your purse and made sure that your phone was charged and that you had the power bank in there. You heard Harry get the blowdryer on, he was prone to colds and the last thing he wanted was to get sick because he went out with wet hair and then not be able to be around you two. LA was not as warm as it typically was this time of year, so he just needed to go the extra mile. After he finished up you reached for the camera and started recording as you approached the bathroom, you smiled as the angle you were coming from captured Harry brushing his teeth in the mirror. "It is 2:37 in the morning and there's your dad, getting ready to go." you said as you zoomed into his reflection, "He's also very excited to meet you." you said and Harry's eyes met with yours through the mirror. He spit out the toothpaste foam in his mouth and he smiled at you.
"C'mere." he urged you and you zoomed out as you waddled in, "Let me see that." he said taking the camera from your and turning it around to you. "Listen here, baby Styles." he started and you rolled your eyes playfully, "There's no way you'll ever know what it took to get you here. Everything your mum's about to do to get you into our arms, it's gonna be a lot. A lot of pain and a lot of time, but there's also going to be a lot of love. And every family has their up and downs, but whenever you get upset at your mum in the future just remember everything she went through to make sure you were here with us. She took such good care of you while you were in her tummy and she will take good care of your for the rest of your life." he said and you smiled at him, "So just...be nice and patient with her, especially when you're a teenager OK?" he said and you chuckled, "I mean look at how pretty she is. How could anyone ever have any bad feelings towards her?" he said and you shook your head, "And I will make sure to set a really good example for you on how we treat your mum. I can't wait to meet you. I love you already." he said and you rolled your lips together to suppress your smile. "I love you too." he said as he zoomed further and further into your smile before he stopped recording and set the camera down. Just then the next contraction hit and he pulled you close as you winced at the pain.
"How much worse can this get?" you whimpered through the pain and Harry frowned.
"I don't know, baby." he sighed, "But they can give you things to help with that, yeah? To make sure it doesn't hurt too much." he said and you nodded. "I don't know h-how well they work but I'm sure it'll help." he assured.
"I just want to be calm." you explained as the pain faded, "I don't want to be so in pain that I don't remember anything, you know?" you asked and he nodded in understanding.
"We'll ask about that straight away." he assured you and you nodded.
"One more request." You said and he nodded attentively, "Don't you dare record anything going on down there." you said seriously and he chuckled, "I know it's life coming into the world and all, so feel free to go look but just no recording, I don't think I ever want to see the mess of it. Also it's still my vagina...like I know it won't be so private anymore, but the less people I have watching it get torn apart, the better." you said and he nodded through his soft laughter.
"OK, promise I won't." he assured you and kissed your lips.
"Especially my mom. She will try to take pictures of it, I know she will." you said with some stress in your voice now. "I've already talked to her about it and that I will kick her out if she even tries! But you better back me up if it comes to that." you said and he nodded.
"I will back you up 100%, baby." he assured you and you smiled, "I love you more than anything in the world. Thank you for making me so happy and for giving me everything we've ever wanted." he said with tearful eyes and you sniffled.
"No crying, there's already gonna be a lot of that..." you whined and he chuckled.
"I can't help it! There's just a lot of feelings, you're already such a good mum. Can't wait to actually see you with our baby." he hummed and you smiled and grabbed his jaw and he leaned down to kiss you slowly.
"Let's go have this baby then." you smiled against his lips.
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gegengestalt · 2 months
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131 useless or often forgotten facts in The Brothers Karamazov!
This 27 of April is the second anniversary of the day I finished this book for the first time. To do something special, I reread it over the last 20 days and as I did it, I compiled little things that are easy to forget in these 1000 pages filled with food for thought. Let's go!
1. Mitya fought in a duel, though it's most likely that nobody died in it.
2. Ivan's journalist pseudonym is "Eyewitness".
3. Alyosha, in his own words, came back to Skotoprigonyevsk to visit his mother's grave.
4. Fyodor Pavlovich owns several taverns in the district.
5. Grigory was the one who gave Sofia Ivanovna a proper gravestone.
6. Alyosha is one deduction away from becoming a communist.
7. The Brothers Karamazov begins in late August.
8. Kalganov is supposedly Alyosha's friend. This is never mentioned ever again.
9. Kalganov gave one coin to some beggars and told them to divide it among themselves.
10. There is a rumour that the previous elder beat people with sticks. This is false.
11. Alyosha is the only person in the monastery who knows that Rakitin is an atheist, and keeps his secret.
12. Four years ago, Pyotr Miusov divulged a fake story about a saint making out with his own decapitated head. Fyodor never forgot.
13. Madame Khokhlakov is only 33 years old. She has been a widow for 5 years, meaning Lise lost her father at age 9.
14. Zosima's serenity in front of the woman who confesses to a murder may foreshadow his later recollection of having a murder confessed to before.
15. Zosima likes to make jokes.
16. Lise and Alyosha last saw each other two years before.
17. Reminder that Grushenka met Mitya because Fyodor wanted her help to throw Mitya into a debtors' prison.
18. Kuzma Samsonov is the mayor of Skotoprigonyevsk.
19. Ivan rambled to Dmitri and Katerina about how he thinks Rakitin will be a failed journalist turned landlord.
20. Fyodor Pavlovich's house is filled with rats.
21. The Miusov family had their own private theatre.
22. Lizaveta Smerdyashchaya was a bit over 142cm/4'7 tall.
23. In 1842 there was a runaway convict called Karp commiting crimes in Skotoprigonyevsk.
24. Marya Kondratievna's mother is missing a leg.
25. Mitya ghosted a girl in real life.
26. Katerina's mother died when she was young.
27. Mitya had a fever for two weeks once because of a spider bite.
28.Mitya thought Grushenka was "nothing striking" the first time he saw her.
29. Mitya was squatting in his neighbour's rented room.
30. Fyodor Pavlovich has a portrait of the former provincial governor in his house.
31. Fyodor Pavlovich goes to sleep at 3- 4AM, like Dostoyevsky himself.
32. Sofia Ivanovna was being courted by a rich man called Beliavsky while she was married.
33. Who was the woman coming from the alley that Mitya mistook for Grushenka? I still wonder.
34. A cheap glass jar was destroyed during Mitya's frenzied break- in.
35. Katerina sends two detailed reports a week to her surrogate mother figure who lives in Moscow.
36. Katerina has an aquarium.
37. Alyosha sleeps using his monk habit as a blanket.
38. Father Ferapont survives eating nothing more than 1,6kg of bread a week.
39. Ivan had told his father about his feelings for Katerina, for some reason.
40. When Alyosha kissed his father, he had the impression that Alyosha was thinking that it was their last conversation.
41. Madame Khokhlakova owns three houses as property.
42. Madame Khokhlakova and Katerina Ivanovna are supposedly great friends.
43. Ivan reads Schiller when nobody is looking.
44. One of Snegiryov's daughters, Varvara, is invested in feminism.
45. Captain Snegiryov's childhood friend is a lawyer.
46. Mitya spilled cognac over the table of the summerhouse.
47. Smerdyakov sings in falsetto.
48. Marya Kondratievna is the only one who ever calls Smerdyakov 'Pavel Fyodorovich'.
49. Ivan uses Smerdyakov as a messenger.
50. Dmitri and Katerina had been engaged for around six months.
51. Ivan's right shoulder looks lower than the left one when he walks.
52. Smerdyakov often moves the tip of his right foot from side to side when he stands (adorable).
53. Dmitri's favourite death threats are "pounding in a mortar" and "breaking legs".
54. Grigory suffers from paralysis three times a year.
55. The real name of 'Lyagavy' is Gorstkin.
56. Zosima's real name is "Zinovy".
57. There was actually another old German doctor before Herzenstube and he was named Eisenschmidt.
58. Zosima has known Brother Anfim for forty years.
59. The Bible is thrown once.
60. Madame Khokhlakova asked Rakitin to go to the funeral as her eye.
61. Alyosha was hiding behind the grave of starets Iov, who lived 105 years.
62. Zosima was harshly criticized for telling a monk hallucinating to take his meds if praying doesn't work.
63. Both Grushenka and Rakitin are children of deacons.
64. Samsonov is the only person that Grushenka seems to be completely and clearly sincere with.
65. Likewise, Samsonov only trusts her when it comes to counting money.
66. Samsonov has the entire first floor of his house for himself.
67. Mitya tells many of his secrets to his landlords, who are fond of him.
68. Alongside eggs and bread, Mitya grabbed and ate a piece of sausage that he "found".
69. Mitya and Perkhotin first met at the Metropolis tavern.
70. Mitya's dueling pistols are his "most prized possessions".
71. Madame Khokhlakova apparently borrows money from Miusov.
72. The brass pestle was 17 centimetres long.
73. Mitya spent exactly 300 rubles in food and alcohol in Mokroye, and it would have been 400 if Perkhotin didn't help.
74. Mitya gave a glass of champagne to a kid.
75. The owner of Plotnikov's shop is called Varvara Alexeievna.
76. Two thousand villagers live in Mokroye.
77. Trifon Borissovich makes his younger daughters clean up the messes of every guest of the inn.
78. Pan Wroblewski is 190cm / 6'2 tall.
79. Madame Khokhlakova gets a migraine whenever she has to talk to Mitya.
80. The ispravnik's elder granddaughter is called Olga, and the night of the murder was her birthday.
81. The prosecutor's wife seems very interested in sending for Mitya often, for reasons he doesn't know.
82. Mitya does not know that the epidermis is the outer layer of the skin.
83. Nikolay Parfenovich is the only person in the world who trusts Ippolit Kirillovich.
84. Mitya often dreams that a person that he fears is chasing him and searching for him.
85. Nikolay Parfenovich wears a smoky topaz ring on his middle finger.
86. Pan Wroblewski is a dentist without a license.
87. Kalganov had visited Grushenka once before, but she seemed to dislike him for some reason.
88. Kolya's father died when he was a little baby.
89. There was a plot going on in the background about the doctor's maid having a child out of wedlock.
90. Rakitin often talks with Kolya. Seems like the only person who takes his ideas seriously is a literal child.
91. Smerdyakov and Ilyusha met and talked to each other.
92. Alyosha rarely gets colds.
93. Katerina befriended Snegiryov's sick wife.
94. Kolya was taken to a judge for teaching a guy how to efficiently crack the neck of a goose.
95. Kolya is against women's rights.
96. Mitya and Grushenka spent five weeks secluded and away from each other after the arrest.
97. Grushenka went to see Grigory to try to convince him that the door wasn't open.
98. Rakitin made up in an article that Madame Khokhlakova offered Mitya 3k rubles to run away with her.
99. Madame Khokhlakova doesn't remember Rakitin's patronymic, and calls him "Ivanovich" instead of "Osipovich".
100. Madame Khokhlakova didn't know of the judicial system reform until two days before the trial.
101. Lise sent chocolates to Mitya in jail, even though there's no reference to them ever interacting before.
102. Alyosha has had the same dream about the devils that Lise has.
103. Alyosha is friends with the jail inspector, who often discusses the gospels with him.
104. Mitya spent two entire nights awake since he discovered ethics.
105. Ivan cleans his own room.
106. Smerdyakov shared a hospital room with an agonizing dropsy patient.
107. Mitya's letter had the bill on the other side.
108. Smerdyakov uses garters with his stockings.
109. There is an apple tree in Fyodor's garden.
110. One of Ivan's "most stupid" thoughts is being the fat wife of a merchant.
111. Ivan had a friend named Korovkin when he was 17, the one he told the story of the quadrillion kilometres to.
112. Ivan has another poem named Geological Cataclysm.
113. Alyosha was the first person the distraught Marya Kondratievna ran to.
114. Ivan is mistaken for "the eldest son" twice in the trial.
115. Grigory did not remember he was in 1866.
116. Rakitin knows "every detail" of the biography of Fyodor Pavlovich and all the Karamazovs.
117. Grushenka's surname, Svetlova, means "light".
118. Mitya once dropped 100 rubles while he was drunk.
119. Ivan saw not just the Devil, but people who had died while he walked in the street.
120. Ippolit Kirillovich died nine months after the trial, the first and last day he received applauses.
121. Marfa is dismissed as a suspect simply because they can't imagine her killing.
122. There is a partition wall in Mitya's lodgings.
123. Mitya mostly stopped staring at the floor during the prosecutor's speech whenever Grushenka was mentioned.
124. Fetyukovich bends forward in an unnerving manner when he speaks.
125. An 18 year old street vendor committed axe murder earlier that year.
126. The verdict was given past 1AM, making the trial last almost 16 hours.
127. Katerina kept the sick Ivan in her house knowing it could possibly be harmful to her reputation.
128. Rakitin tried to sneak in to see Mitya in the hospital twice.
129. Lise sent the flowers that adorn Ilyusha's coffin, and Katerina paid for the grave.
130. Snegiryov cries seeing his late son's little boots the same way one of the women at the monastery in the beginning of the book did.
131. At the end, Alyosha mentions "leaving the city for a long time" soon. Where to? We don't know.
If you read this far down, I hope you enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed writing all of these down.
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stylesispunk · 8 months
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"I couldn't want you anymore" part 5
Artist! Joel Miller x Florist! Reader
series masterlist | previous chapter | next
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summary: when Sarah's mom comes back into Joel's life to fight for their past relationship, Joel needs to convince her he is in a happy relationship with the florist next to his gallery in order to make her go away. The problem is, that he and the florist can't stand each other's guts or that it's what he thinks.
warning: age gap (Joel is 36 and reader is 28). Remember that "Bee" is reader's nickname, fluff, some feelings are being confessed (again), angst (poor reader) mentions of an accident, and conflicted emotions.
a/n: This one is more than 6k. I don't love this one as the last one, but I wanted to deliver this one to you. Sorry for the drama during this chapter, I was PMSing haha. Reblogs and comments are always appreciated, please share your thoughts with me, I love reading your comments and send ne any ask if you want ❤️ Sorry for any grammar mistake.💌 p.s the first line is a reference to all too well 😭
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After 3 long months in the grave. The flowers died of thirst. The place that once seemed full of life, now it was an empty street of broken pieces left behind by your ghost, and for Joel, passing by your shop every day seemed to be the hardest task of his life.
As time passed by, the cobblestones outside your shop remained empty, echoing the silence of what once was the first page of you and him. Joel couldn’t help but wonder how he had let something as precious as that slipped through his fingers, a regret that would haunt him for a long time to come. 
Meanwhile, you found yourself far away from the streets of that life. Still in town, but trying to leave behind any trace of him and the painful memories of the night Joel broke your heart.
Your place now was next to Connell. After your castle crumbled, he was there, and before life separated the both of you, he fit in your life. He built the fire to kept you warm after the storm that left you stranded, and both of you had made the decision to give your love story a second chance. This time, taking tiny steps to build a steady castle. After all, he acted like a prince, taking you out on dates, and expressing his affection through gestures that left you feeling unworthy of his kindness. 
 You had become someone you weren’t. The one with the knife, a liar.
And these few weeks leading up to your new life in London were fulfilled by different emotions. You were busy taking care of some things, closing down your flower shop, and making arrangements for your upcoming journey. It was a bittersweet time filled with farewells to old friends, packing up your life, and starting to write the pages of your new book.  
But you still thought of Joel, the memories of him were hard to erase. He remained a lingering presence in your thoughts. You could still see you both lost in those memories, but it was never real. You shared something that didn’t work beyond words and fake actions for the world to see. And you just hated your persistent temptation to ask what would be different if you had never let those three words escaped from your lips. You may still have moments together, he may still have been part of you, but at what cost?
During the course of these three months, Lily and Tommy got together. The news left you speechless at the beginning. You were happy for them even when it was unexpected. You never saw the signs or you were just mesmerized by the other Miller to even notice Tommy was making his way through your best friend’s heart. Now, they were building their own love story, creating a heartwarming contrast to your journey. Their relationship served as a reminder that love could be found in different places. 
But for you, moving on wasn’t easy. The pain of a broken heart, mixed with the sweet memories you were leaving behind alongside the life you once knew, weighed heavily on your mind. And the biggest fear heightening over your shoulders was the intense fear of hurting Connell. 
Connell, the one thing you did right in your life. The man you knew you wanted to marry once you met him, who had always treated you right. The thought of causing him to regret you because of pain was almost unbearable.
You knew he deserved nothing but happiness, and you wondered if your relationship with Joel had permanently damaged your capacity to truly commit to and reciprocate his love.
Of course, you loved him, but you just weren’t in love with him.
And you found yourself almost every night deeply sighing in the middle of the night, wondering if Joel was still up thinking about you the same way you still thought about him. And you bet he thought you still hated him, even when you had spent the last three months thinking about the minimal chance of him coming back to you, asking for your forgiveness, and stopping you from going to another country to start a new life. 
But after three months, he had gone radio silent, and you were dreaming about him touching your face, asking if you wanted to try it for real this time.
And you despise yourself for it.
You had Connell giving you all his love, and you were becoming a knife ripping his heart.
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Connell had been the one in charge of helping you to sell your shop, as you didn’t want to spend the time in that place and accidentally running into Joel.
Saying goodbye to the place you made so many memories was hitting hard on you, and you could see the love and concern in Connell’s eyes as he told he had managed the sale. Nevertheless, he spared you from details of the buyer’s identity and only walked straight to your room without uttering more words. He carried the weight of this decision on your behalf.
the next day, when he was supposed to go to the shop and give the new owner the keys of your now ex-flower shop. An emergency call prevented him from going, so he told you to go instead. 
And you couldn’t lie, even when you had decided to distance yourself from your shop and everything associated with your past, the thought of saying a final goodbye in person didn’t seem like a bad idea. You wonder about the new owner's identity, the person who would now hold the keys to a place that had been a special of your life. 
As you stood outside the shop, you took a deep breath to steady your trembling hands, so you stepped inside. The familiar scent of what was left of the flowers that once adorned the place, and the soft glow of sunlight streaming through the windows, made your heart break at the thought of leaving. 
But in the end, your eyes fell upon the last person you expected to see, Joel. He seemed just as taken aback as you were. 
“Bee,” he said, softly,  making himself believe you were in front of him.
Your name seemed foreign slipping through his lips, the same ones brushing over your skin not long. 
You even feared speaking and risking another goodbye.
For a moment, time stopped, as if the world outside these walls didn’t exist. Your heart pounded in your chest.
Your heart raced as your eyes locked onto his, and a mix of emotions surged within you.
"Joel," you finally managed to say, your voice carrying surprise. His presence stirred memories, both beautiful and painful, and it was hard for you to face them. "What are you doing here?"
Joel hesitated, his eyes searching yours for a sign of understanding. "I… Connell sold your shop to Tommy” he said. 
Your heart constricted at the mention of Connell selling the shop to Tommy. You knew there was more behind that statement. You had gotten to know Joel to know he was lying through his teeth right now, but you had rather ignore that feeling settling in your heart. 
He cleared his throat. “I didn’t know you’d be here.” 
"Tommy bought the shop?" you asked, trying to wrap your head around the situation.
Joel nodded, his gaze never leaving yours. "Yes, he did. He thought it would be nice since you love this place so much.”
That stirred a mix of emotions within you, but you pushed them aside for the moment. “And why are you here instead?
“He couldn’t make it and I thought Connell was coming” Joel answered, "But it’s nice to see you.”
The tension in the room was palpable, and the weight of unspoken words hung heavily in the air between you and Joel. The past few weeks, becoming in three months , had left their mark, and you weren't sure how to navigate life with those permanent wounds. 
Joel's presence, felt so strange to you now. The familiarity of his face, his voice, and the way he looked at you brought back a flood of memories of the stolen kisses you found yourself missing so much. 
“When are you leaving?” He asked, knowing that this would be the last time he was going to be able to have you in front of him. 
“In a week” you answered shortly. 
Joel's heart sank at the confirmation. He had everything in his hands to prevent the end of your story, but he didn’t want to stop you from finding peace and happiness in the arms of a man who truly deserved you in every way. You had chosen to start a new chapter in London with Connell, and he was the character from a chapter you were leaving behind.
He looked at you, searching for something in your eyes, a glimpse of the love you told him you felt for him. But it was hard to read your emotions. You felt a foreigner before his eyes. 
"I see," he replied, trying to hide the pain in his voice.
The room felt heavy with unsaid words and unfinished written pages. You both had left things unsaid, Joel especially, and the future was uncertain. You couldn't help but feel the pull of what once was, even as you tried to move forward with your life.  
Joel realized he had to make his peace with your decision. He had been given a chance to say those three words, three months ago, and he had to accept that he had ruined his opportunity with you. Your upcoming goodbye was a reminder that time was running out for him to say what needed to be said.
"Bee, I won't hold you back," he said, his voice gentle. "But before you go, there's something I need to tell you."
Your gaze met his, and you could see the sincerity in his eyes. There was a vulnerability in him that you had rarely seen. Joel's next words would be crucial and may be a turning point for both of you.
As Joel was on the edge of saying something, the door chimed softly as it opened.
It was Connell. His entrance created an unexpected interruption, and the atmosphere grew tense.
You shared a brief glance with Joel, and the weight of the unspoken words lingered heavily.
Joel addressed Connell first; his voice laced with an attempt to save you from any problem. "We were just saying goodbye.”
Connell acknowledged this with a nod but couldn't shake the feeling that he had walked into something else.  
“I thought you were busy,” you said to Connell, walking to his side.
“I finished earlier” he gave you a small smiled as he touched one of your arms “You can wait for me outside” he told you, trying to give you reassurance.
You nodded, glancing one last time at Joel, the tension remained inside the room, and the words Joel had been on the verge of sharing with you were left hanging in the air.
And you finally exited the room, saying your last goodbye to Joel without uttering a word. 
Once you left the shop, Connell spoke first, his voice carrying a serious tone "Joel, I know you want her to forgive you, but I want you to know that she's important to me and I love her."
Joel nodded, understanding the weight of Connell's words. "I know, Connell. And you've been good to her. I've seen that."
Connell hesitated, searching Joel's eyes for sincerity. "She deserves to be happy.” 
Joel's gaze was unwavering as he replied, "I know she does. And if that means she's happier with you, then I won't stand in the way."
Connell kept silence for a moment. “You didn’t tell her, did you?”
Joel shook his head.
“Thank you. She would have killed me if she knew I sold the shop to you”, Connell said, with a tint of humor in his tone. 
Joel managed a small smile at Connell's comment. It was an attempt to lighten the atmosphere even though the underlying tension remained. "I wouldn't have wanted to give her another reason to be mad at me."
Connell nodded in understanding. "I appreciate that, Joel. I just want her to have a fresh start, free from all this mess”
Joel's gaze turned thoughtful. "I want that too, Connell. She deserves to move on and be happy."
Connell looked at Joel for a moment. “You made her happy too. Don’t blame yourself too hard, Joel” 
Joel met Connell's gaze, gratitude and sadness intertwined in his eyes. "Thank you, Connell. It means a lot to hear that from you."
The two men shared a silent moment, the weight of feeling they both share for you intertwined lives somehow.
Joel took a deep breath, finally breaking the silence. "I should get going. You both have a new life to start."
Connell extended his hand, and Joel shook it firmly. "Take care of her, Connell."
Connell nodded; his grip steady. "I will, Joel. And you take care of yourself too."
With that, Joel turned and walked away, leaving behind the memories he shared with you inside this place, the first stolen glances, the fighting, the laughter, and the cups of coffee you left for him every morning. All that being left behind, buried.  
As Joel stepped out of the shop, he turned and locked eyes with you for what felt like the last time. The weight on both of your hearts hung in the air. In that fleeting moment, your gazes held longing and hurt. You were the tear hanging inside his heart. 
And Joel's eyes searched yours for a final glimpse of love. He had wanted to say so much, but the timing had never been right, and now it was too late, but he hoped that you’d find your way back in the end. 
You met his gaze with sadness and understanding. There was something about him that made your heart clench. He had been the man who touched your soul before your skin, and how would it be possible for you to forget about that?
You offered a small nod, and he returned it in kind, sharing that secret language you both learned, as a silent goodbye. 
Was that “I love you” the worst thing he had ever heard?
And then, as quickly as it had begun, Joel turned and walked away, disappearing into the distance. The chapter you had shared was closing, and as he faded from view, you knew it was time to look ahead, to embrace the new beginning that awaited next to Connell miles away. 
Connell watched that unspoken interaction and sensed the weight on your shoulders. He walked over to you, and gently pressed a kiss on your forehead, as a tender gesture, a silent promise of a future without wounds to take care of.  With his kiss, he silently looked for reassurance that you weren’t having second thoughts. 
.....
The warmth of the evening had set the perfect backdrop for a dinner in the backyard. You and Connell had prepared a delightful spread of chicken, grilled vegetables, and a bottle of wine that Connell had selected for sharing with your friends. Lily and Tommy sat around the wooden patio table, the soft glow of string lights overhead casting a warm glow.
As Tommy and Connell got engrossed in a conversation about their favorite sports teams, you and Lily found yourselves drawn to the quieter solace of the backyard. There, under the starry sky, you could speak without being overheard.
You looked at them, attentive, with a serious expression, your eyes reflected the soft, flickering light.  
Lily glanced at you; concern etched across her face. "A penny for your thoughts, Bee bee?” 
You took a deep breath, “I think I’m a little bit nervous about next week.” 
Lily's eyes filled with understanding as she listened intently. “Nervous about London? Or leaving Joel behind?”
Your gaze shifted, and you looked at Lily with surprise. It was as if she had read your thoughts, as always. You nodded slowly. "Both, actually.” 
Lily leaned in closer, her voice a soft, comforting murmur. "Bee, it's okay to have mixed feelings. Leaving behind a place and someone who meant so much to you is never easy. But it's also the beginning of this new adventure with Connell."
You sighed, feeling grateful for Lily's understanding. She made you feel at ease with your racing thoughts. “I just wish it were simpler, you know? I don't want to hurt anyone. I couldn’t forgive myself if I hurt Connell” 
At that moment, your and Connell's gazes met from the distance. He gave you a big smile which you mirrored, but it didn’t reach your eyes. 
You felt Lily’s hand on yours as a gesture of reassurance. “You have a big heart, Bee. Connell loves you for who you are. Trust in that."
Lily's words were a soothing balm to your worried mind. Her support and the warm of her friendship alongside the starry evening created a special moment in her last days in this place. You knew that leaving the past behind was never a straightforward journey, but it was reassuring to have a friend who understood your complexities.
As Connell's gaze met yours and you exchanged smiles, once again, you realized that your anxieties didn't mean you loved him any less. The weight of the past could coexist with the past, and maybe you could learn how to fall in love with him again. 
Joel managed a fragile smile, and he held your hand as if it were the lifeline he needed at that moment.
Sarah and Tommy lingered in the doorway, watching the two of you with tiny smiles on their faces. 
Joel spoke softly, "I'm sorry for worrying you, Bee."
You shook your head, your voice filled with genuine concern. "Don’t say anything” you said as you laid your head on his chest, as if hearing the beating of his heart would reassure you, he was going to be okay.
As you leaned your head against Joel's chest, seeking comfort in the steady rhythm of his heartbeat, you didn't notice Connell watching the two of you from the hospital lobby. His expression was unreadable. There was concern, understanding, and a tinge of jealousy. 
Connell had supported you through everything since you both were eighteen years old, and he loved you deeply. But seeing you in this moment with Joel stirred emotions within him that he couldn't fully process, leaving a siren in his mind.
Sarah and Tommy decided to leave the room, giving the two of you some privacy. Joel's hand gently rested on your back, his fingers tracing comforting patterns down your spine as if his fingers were brushes tracing lines on your back.
Joel spoke again "Bee, I know I've made a mess of things, but I want you to know that you mean a lot to me. More than I can put into words."
You didn't respond with words. Instead, you tightened your grip on him, holding him close, and Connell remained in the background, his thoughts and feelings his own, as you and Joel found peace in each other's presence. 
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Once you were back home, you were awfully quiet for Connell’s like. He had seen the way your face sparkled when you were with Joel in his room, how you held him tight, and how you seemed terrified at the thought of losing him.
It was the moment in which Connell realized he wasn’t the one anymore, but he didn’t want to admit it. He wanted to hold onto the memories. 
“Hey, are you okay?” He asked you, trying to make you talk.
Connell's voice pulled you out of the storm inside your mind since your arrival from the hospital. You turned to face him, offering a faint smile that didn't quite reach your eyes.
"I'm okay, Connell," you replied, though your tone carried a hint of sadness. "Just a lot to process."
He nodded; concern showed across his features. "I understand. It's a lot to take in. But you know I'm here for you, right?"
You appreciated Connell's support more than you could express. He had been a rock in your life. It was just the reappearance of Joel after these three months and the accident had stirred up a multitude of feelings you thought didn’t exist. 
"I do,” you said, reaching out to take his hand. "You've been amazing, and I love you for that."
Connell's smile brightened at your words, and he squeezed your hand gently. "I love you too” he declared as he kissed your temple, as a way to find reassurance. 
You hugged Connell tightly as if to reassure yourself that you were still grounded in the present, even as the past loomed large in your heart and mind.
But for Connell, the pages were clearly written and he knew your heart didn’t belong to him anymore. 
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One week later, and the night before your departure for London, everything seemed bittersweet around you. You were finished packing what was the last of your belongings, and the weight of leaving your life behind was the heavier suitcase you were carrying.
During the last week, you didn’t see Joel. All the updates about his recovery were through Lily, and the only thing you knew was that he had been dispatched from the hospital today.
You really wanted things between Connell and you to work out, so you made your promise to not see Joel again in order to do that. That night in the hospital was the goodbye you needed, and that was it. He was okay, so you were okay. You had bled, but your wounds would heal sooner than later. 
Nevertheless, Connell had been watching your movements for the last few days, and now, as you were carefully folding your clothes and going through the last-minute preparations. He found the strength to speak up. 
"There's something I've been thinking about," Connell began, his eyes reflecting the depths of his feelings.
You paused in your packing, looking into Connell's eyes, eager to hear what he had to say. "What is it?”
Connell took a deep breath, struggling to find the right words. " I don't want to be the reason for your regrets."
Your heart pounded in your chest as Connell spoke, tears welled up in your eyes. 
“You love him,” he said in a breathy voice. 
He wasn’t thinking about himself anymore, or where you would go after this, he was thinking about you. 
“Connell, we’re leaving tomorrow. I’m with you and I love you” you whispered, trying to convince him, and mostly yourself at the same time. 
Connell nodded, his own eyes brimming with tears. "You love me, I know, but you’re not in love with me.” 
You wiped away a tear, your voice trembling. "Connell"
“You’re in love with Joel and he is in love with you”, he declared.
As much as he was devasted by the thought of letting you go, he wanted you to be happy. He would give you everything, even when he would be a little in between for a while.
You shook your head. “He isn’t.”
“Then why did he buy your shop?”
“What?” Your eyes widened. You felt shocked and confused. “Why?”
Connell reached out and took your hand, his touch warm and reassuring. "I think he did it because he thought you would come back and because he is in love with you.” 
Connell gazed at you with a mixture of sadness and love. "And I love you enough to let you go” " He said “You need more time to figure things out, and I don’t want you to go with me if you can’t do that.”
His words pierced your heart. 
“I don’t want you to hate me,” you said, whispering. 
Connell chuckled softly, Connell squeezed your hand gently, and then he cupped your face with his hand to look at you in the eyes. “Nothing you say or you do would make me hate you” You leaned in his touch and hugged him tightly, crying on his shoulder.
“I love you more than I could express.” You mumbled.
Connell held you tightly, his embrace filled with love, even though he knew it was time to let you go. His heart was heavy.
And the next morning, with one last, lingering kiss, you and Connell let each other go. You watched him boarding the plane, and as it took off, your eyes watered, you let your tears fall down your cheeks.
That plane carried Connell away from your life again, and you held onto the final image of Connell, offering a gentle wave and a bittersweet smile, muttering an “I love you” at you before disappearing from your sight. 
Once you got in your car, you felt the weight of your emotions pressing down on you like a heavy blanket suffocating you. All the love, guilt, sadness, and anger crunched your heart, leaving you alone with your thoughts. 
In the spare of seconds, Joel came to your mind and you felt anger surging through your veins like fire. You couldn’t help but blame him for ruining the opportunity you had to move on. You questioned yourself why you still wanted to go back to him and why he was coming back to you in your dreams as if he wanted to taunt you, and your frustration grew.
With a burning feeling settled in your chest, you made your way to Joel's house. You couldn't understand why he had bought your shop, why he had disrupted your life once again, so once you arrived, you stormed out of the car, determined to confront him. 
 You stood at his doorstep, your knuckles brushing against the wood, your heart pounding in your chest. When the door opened, there he stood, still bandaged from the accident. He looked surprised at seeing you here. 
"Joel," you began, your voice laced with anger. "Why?”
His brows furrowed, and he stammered "Bee, I thought you'd be on a plane to London with Connell by now."
You met his surprised gaze with anger. "I was supposed to be, but Connell stopped me from it.” 
Joel seemed surprised, but something in his gaze showed relief at knowing you would still be here. He stepped aside, allowing you to enter his house, and you both moved to the living room. The familiar surroundings seemed to echo with memories of your last time together. The three words you confessed to him, the way he broke your heart, and then you walked out of his life. 
“Why did you lie to me?” you demanded “Why did you tell Tommy bought my shop, when it was really you?”
You were met with silence.
“Why did you buy it, Joel?” you shouted. 
“Because I knew you would come back to me,” he said, as a matter of fact. Simply as if he owned you.
Your anger flared at his audacity. "You can't just manipulate my life like that, Joel! You can't decide things for me without even asking” Your voice suddenly deepened. “And for what do you even want me?” you asked “For playing with my fee-“
Joel's lips crashed onto yours, and for a moment, you were stunned into silence. The kiss was intense and filled with all the longing and regret Joel felt. 
As he pulled away, his eyes bore into yours with an intensity that took your breath away. "I bought the shop because I couldn't bear to see you go without a chance for us to make things right."
You were caught between anger and desire, your heart racing from the sudden kiss. "Joel, you can't just kiss me and expect everything to be fixed."
He reached out to cup your face, even with one of his hands broken, his thumb gently tracing your cheek. "I'm not expecting that, Bee. I just needed you to know that I love you”
 Torn between your anger and the lingering love you felt, you took a step back, away from his touch.
“What?”
“I love you,” he said, not taking his eyes off you. “I’m in love with you.” 
Your eyes and mouth were wide open, but you still managed to shoot him a glare. You could pretend you didn’t hear him and leave. You didn’t trust yourself right now, but his big brown eyes prevented her from walking away.
He told you he was in love with you.
Your voice wavered as you replied, "Joel, you can't just say that now. Not after everything that happened."
He took a step closer, his eyes searching yours. "I know I should have said it earlier, and I'm sorry for all the pain I've caused. But it's the truth, Bee. I love you, and I'm willing to do whatever it takes me to make things right."
You struggled to maintain your composure, you were shocked,
“Are you going to say something?” he whispered. 
 "Joel, it's not that simple” you spoke
He nodded, his expression earnest. "I understand that. I know we have a lot to work through, and I'm willing to take the time and the effort.” 
Your heart ached at his words, and the internal battle you had been fighting raged on. "Joel, I need time to think and process all of this. I can't make any promises right now."
Joel reached out to gently touch your arm, a silent plea in his eyes. "I'll give you the time you need, Bee. Just promise me you won't leave” he said, cupping your face.
You found yourself relaxing with his presence and touch, by nodding your head as a silence promise. 
 "Okay,” you whispered.
Your head was a thunderstorm of infinite questions running through your head. You had so many, but you didn’t know where to start. 
He smiled at you, and that made you lose your mind and you don’t know what to do, what to express, or how to act. 
“I’m glad you’re okay” you whispered.
Joel's smile held a genuine warmth, and his thumb traced soothing patterns on your cheek. "I'm glad I'm okay too, and I'm grateful you're still here."
The two of you stood there in a moment of fragility as your eyes locked onto Joel’s.
You had to go before you lost your mind, and you needed space to clear your head. You took a step back, your gaze not quite meeting his. 
"I need to go now, Joel. I need time to think."
Joel's expression showed understanding, and he nodded. "I get it, Bee. Take all the time you need."
You turned and headed for the door; your steps were slow as if a string was pulling into him. The weight of what started as a simple game between you two, the confusion of the present and the uncertainty of the future were heavy on your shoulders. You needed time to heal your scars, to figure out what your heart truly wanted.
Before leaving, you glanced back at Joel, and for a brief moment, your eyes met again, unspoken words flowing in the air. Then, you stepped out, leaving behind the man who had both broken and mended your heart, and who now waited for your decision.
It was his time to wait now.
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a/n: Okay, so now he bought the shop because he knew she was going to come back to him somehow and he wanted to have it for her because the flower shop was important to her and after all, he has the keys to her heart (yes, as cheesy as it sounds). Now, he has to fix everything and suffer a little because the reader (bee) has to be loved. btw I'm already thinking about the next fic
tags: @joeldjarin @borhapparker @fatima-marisa @kirsteng42 @paleidiot @harriedandharassed @runningmom94 @pedr0swh0r3 @ssacharcoalgrey
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