#(at least if i don't want to have nightmares like i did all week and for tomorrow to be even worse) | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

punkshort · 3 months

Note

i’m the anon who asked about the request! if you decide to do it, i’d absolutely wait forever😂 it’s very angsty tho, so the idea was for outbreak joel who doesn’t get the happy ending. reader who was head over heels in love coping with his death, maybe flashbacks to show the moments of reader seeing him die? idkidk the idea is very vague, sorry if it’s too sad!! if so maybe reader seeing him die was just a terrible nightmare & he’s there waking them up & helping them through a meltdown?

i’ve been craving for some emotional torture for wtv reason😭😭 thank you for even considering requests!🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾

Thank you for this request! It's my first one, so I hope you enjoy it. Also, I had to take the out you gave me and make this a nightmare because I am a big ol' softie and I won't apologize for it, but I will apologize for taking so long to write it 😂

I hate when you're right

Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader

Summary: After a heated argument with Joel, you finally convince him into leaving Jackson so you could explore a store for new clothes, and what happens could change your life forever.

Warnings: major character (Joel) death - but it is just a nightmare - don't read if you think that will still upset you, angst, language, violence, descriptions of blood/gore/death scene

WC: 2.5K

dividers by the one and only @saradika-graphics

You knew it was childish. You knew it wasn't essential. But you also desperately wanted to feel more comfortable, and was that really such a crime? To want to feel like yourself again? To want to wear clothes that you liked? That fit you properly? Jackson was well stocked with essentials, clothes included, but the clothes the men picked up on patrol were... utilitarian, to say the least. They grabbed the biggest and the warmest clothes so that it afforded more people the opportunity to use them, but you were beginning to grow tired of tucking men's oversized shirts into your pants, the material bunching up at your waist and twisting around as you walked, constantly trying and failing to feel comfortable in your own skin.

You thought Joel would be more open to the idea of heading outside the walls on your day off. You even teased him with the promise of picking up some new underwear, but he didn't fall for it. He fought you tooth and nail the whole evening, his voice lifting over yours angrily to explain how there's been an influx of raiders the past few weeks, that everyone agreed to lay low until they passed through, not wanting to draw attention or pick any unwanted fights. But you persisted. You always did, and you eventually wore him down when you threatened to leave without him.

Why was it such a crime to want to feel comfortable? It was just two people, you could lay low and go unseen, no problem. You've done it countless times before.

You had hoped he would have gotten over it by morning, but you were wrong. He hardly made eye contact with you during breakfast, skirting expertly around you in your kitchen, mumbling under his breath as he sipped his coffee and only shooting you angry looks when your back was turned.

The air was crisp and the woods were peaceful. You thought that would surely turn his mood around. He always appreciated being out with nature, living off the land. As much as he loved living in Jackson, he couldn't deny that part of himself that felt useful, that felt a sense of accomplishment by surviving out in the wild.

"C'mon, are you really gonna act like this all day?" you teased as you held up another shirt against your body before determining it was the right size and then tossed it in a pile with the others.

He was standing at the storefront window with his arms crossed and his jaw clenched. "Don't know what you mean."

You rolled your eyes and looked around the store, spotting a table of underwear with a grin. You lightly skipped over and tossed to the side the pairs that looked far too dusty so you could look at the ones underneath. Clearing your throat, you held up a pair of bright red stain underwear. He turned around and you saw it: it was fast, he hid it well, but you still saw it. That all too familiar excited look in his eye.

"Don't you like them?" you asked with a playful pout. He furrowed his brow at you like he was annoyed, and maybe he was, but you still saw the heat beginning to crawl up his neck.

"They ain't practical."

You gave him a defeated sigh and strolled over to your pile of clothes, your fingertips daintily holding the undergarment out to him. "No? Then what are they?"

His eyes shifted from yours to the red material in your hand and you saw his throat work as he swallowed.

"Useless," he croaked, and you narrowed your eyes at him. You got a little closer, letting the soft fabric glide against the back of his hand when you dropped your arm to your side.

"Oh, yeah?" you said breathily, and you watched his eyelids flutter at your tone. "Then I guess it wouldn't matter if I brought them home and let you rip them off me."

He stepped forward, a growl emitting from his chest, low and deep, when at the exact same time, you both heard shouting outside the store. Swiveling both your heads towards the glass storefront, your blood ran cold when you saw six heavily armed men advancing towards you.

"Shit," he muttered, his arm pulling your shoulder down just in time to avoid the cascade of bullets that rained down upon you. You laid face down on the rough carpet, covering the back of your head with your eyes squeezed shut, waiting for the shooting to stop. Joel tugged on your arm and you opened your eyes in a panic.

"Follow me!" he shouted, army crawling towards the registers, and you dutifully followed behind, your heart racing wildly in your chest.

Once you made it, the counter offering some, but not much, safety, the both of you pulled out your guns and double checked your ammo.

"Alright, when they stop to reload-"

"I know," you said, cutting him off. You've both been in this situation before. You knew what to do.

Holding your rifle upright and against your chest, you breathed deep, trying to steady your hands until the bullets slowed and you heard more shouting. Joel nodded to you and you both sprung up from the floor, pulling your rifles against your bodies in sync and lining up your targets.

Patience is a virtue. The amount of ammunition they wasted on the two of you was laughable when you each caught one of them between the eyes, leaving four against two.

You thought you would be able to get another shot off but Joel tugged your arm and you slinked back to the floor as a shower of bullets rained over you once again.

"You good?" he asked, and you nodded, gasping for air. Your hands began to stabilize when the shock wore off. You were in the zone.

Pressing both your backs against the small counter, you remained calm and waited out your attackers. Glass shards tinkled and scattered behind you. Bullets pinged against the metal shelving, ricocheting into the drywall.

"Assault rifles for two people? Really?" you muttered, more so to yourself, but Joel heard you.

"Told you this was a bad fuckin' idea," he said angrily.

When there was another brief pause, he looked to you again and nodded. At the same time, you rose up and took aim, firing on your attackers once again. Joel made his shot, you didn't. Three down, three to go.

"Fuck," you grumbled, reloading your rifle even though you still had rounds left.

"Focus," he scolded.

The men sounded like they were getting closer. Their voices were louder. Clearer. The shots were deafening. You prayed they weren't inside the store, because you hadn't planned an exit strategy. Without warning, Joel stood up and fired a shot. You heard a man scream and then a loud thud. It sounded like the man was just on the other side of the counter.

"That's not the plan," you seethed at him when he dropped back down next to you.

"Didn't have a choice, he was 'bout to jump us," he sneered.

Two against two.

When the shots slowed down, you held your breath, looking at Joel from the corner of your eye. He held his palm up to you silently, signaling for you to stay where you were. You heard boots crunching slowly against glass and your heart leapt into your throat. They were in the store.

You shot Joel a panicked look but he just shook his head, focusing on their footsteps, calculating how far away they were.

"Come out now and no one gets hurt," a man's deep voice called out. He was close.

Joel clenched his jaw and flared his nostrils. You knew that look. It was the look of a man who was about to do something stupid. But before you could stop him, before you could reach out to him and hold him back, he stood up and took aim.

One shot. That was all you heard when Joel slumped to the floor next to you, clutching his stomach as dark red blood poured from the wound. Your eyes went wide and you saw red. Without thinking, you stood up and shot, taking one of the two men down with a yelp. The remaining raider ducked behind a display, and you dropped your rifle in favor of your handgun. Crouching low to the ground, you inched forward, careful of any broken glass that would give your position away. When you were on the other side of the display, you heard the man's labored breaths. He was scared. He was out of his element. And you had him right where you wanted him.

Silently tucking the gun in the back of your pants, you slid your hunting knife out from your ankle holster. You took a deep breath and lunged forward, driving the knife deep into the man's chest.

He dropped his gun and clutched weakly at your hands, but it was no use. His blood poured from the wound when you yanked your knife out with a grunt, and you watched as his hands slowly slid back down to his sides, his eyes still wide open and staring up at the ceiling.

You smirked, feeling victorious for only a moment before you remembered Joel. Dropping your knife, you rushed back to his side, only to find his face pale and his hands stained dark red.

"Joel!" you cried out, pressing your palms against the wound, hoping to slow the bleeding. His eyes drifted towards you, softening when he saw you were alive and unharmed. That you were going to make it.

Panic consumed you. Your heart was slamming against your ribs as you fumbled with your backpack, trying to find your first aid kit through the tears.

"I love you," he whispered, and you shook your head.

"Don't start with that, you're gonna be fine."

"Baby," he said weakly, and you choked back a sob.

"Hold on," you told him, still searching in your pack.

"Look at me," he said, and your hands stilled for a moment before you dragged your eyes back to him, your lower lip trembling as you took in his deteriorating state.

"I need to-" you began, but stopped to take in a shaky breath. "I need to patch you up and get you to the horses."

"No, you don't," he said softly, and more tears spilled from your eyes.

"Yes, I do. I gotta-"

"I ain't gonna make it, sweetheart," he slurred, and you could see by the amount of blood he was losing that he was right. But still, you pressed your palms against the gunshot wound, your fingers slipping through his thick and sticky blood.

"Don't say that. I can't do this without you," you whimpered, and closed your eyes for a brief moment. You felt his fingertips weakly grip your chin and you forced your eyes back open.

"Yes, you can," he said as firmly as he could. He was so pale and weak and it was making your stomach turn.

You shook your head, about to argue with him, but he stopped you.

"You keep goin', you hear me?" he said, and still, you shook your head from side to side, small sobs slipping past your lips. "Don't let this world win. You... go on and keep fightin'. Please. Be happy, baby. For me."

"No!" you cried out, spittle dripping from your lips now, mixing with your tears. "I won't! I-I can't!"

"You can," he repeated, and gave you a weak smile. "I'm ready, baby. It'll be okay."

You squeezed your eyes shut tight, the tears leaking out, hot and angry on your cheeks as you sobbed over him, clutching his hand in yours so tightly, like if you squeezed hard enough, you could give him your lifeforce. Give him your breath. But moments later, his grip weakened and when you opened your eyes, his head slumped to the side and his lifeless eyes stared off into the distance.

"Joel!" you screamed, sitting up in bed, drenched in sweat with tears still streaming down your face. You looked to your side, where he normally slept, but he wasn't there. Panic squeezed your throat, your chest fucking hurt, but you flung the blankets off you and ran towards the door. Still not hearing any sounds, you raced down the stairs, almost tripping in the process but you had a grip on the railing to keep you steady.

When your eyes finally landed on his familiar form stretched out on the couch, his back to you, you allowed yourself to breathe a sigh of relief.

Reality came back to you now. You had your fight about leaving Jackson, but he won and you slept apart. You never left. He never got shot. It was all just a horrible dream.

You stumbled over to the couch, your tears unstoppable, the nightmare too vivid, too real. Your trembling hands clutched his shoulder as you fell to your knees on the floor, shaking him awake.

"What?" he grumbled, clearly still pissed off about your fight.

"I'm sorry!" you sobbed loudly, and when he realized something was wrong, he whipped around to face you.

"What happened?" he asked, his voice still thick with sleep.

"I-I had-" you began, then you hiccupped, cutting yourself off. His face was etched with concern as he forced himself up and cupped your face.

"C'mon, talk to me," he urged, the fear in his eyes reflecting back to you as you looked at him, still not sure what was real and what wasn't.

"I had a nightmare," you finally managed to get out. "About our fight. That we... we went out like I wanted and-and-" you collapsed into another fit of sobs, your shoulders shaking violently.

"Hey, it's alright," he soothed, pulling you up and into his lap and rubbing your back. You pressed your tear stained face into his neck, inhaling deeply, grounding yourself. He was alive. He was here. Everything was fine.

"I'm sorry," you whimpered, your throat still tight but your tears were slowing down. "I'm sorry we fought. I don't wanna go out anymore. I don't need new clothes, it was stupid, I'm sorry."

"Shh, it's okay," he said, pulling you tightly against his chest, "I'm sorry we fought, too. I just wanna keep us safe."

"I know, you're right," you said, pulling back a bit and wiping your nose with the back of your hand. "Will you come back to bed?"

"Yeah," he replied with half a smirk. "'Course I'll come back to bed, baby. Don't cry, it's alright."

You let him lead you up the stairs and to your bedroom, your side of the bed still damp with sweat but it didn't bother you. Joel was safe and sound and in your arms and you didn't care if you had to wear a potato sack for the rest of your life, as long as you had Joel, nothing else mattered.

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imaginedanvrs · 5 months

Text

where did you go?

part 1, part 2 l masterlist

natasha x reader. after a week of your worst nightmares coming to life, you come back a different person and Natasha tries desperately to retrieve your old self. but you just don't let her

word count: 9k

warnings: mentions of kidnapping and torture (not in the kinky way this time), canon marvel type injuries, shock, dissociative amnesia, depression, break up, alcoholism

The world around Natasha thrummed endlessly as she continued to climb past the speed limit that she took no care for. Even in her state of distress, she maintained the reflexes and awareness that made her one of the few people who could drive so fast down the cramped street without issue (or fine) until she pulled up as close as she could to the city hospital. The redhead knew the way to the ward they kept you on as precisely as she did her own home, having been to that very building enough times for her teammates. She had always prayed against all odds that she would never have to go there for you, especially since you disappeared a week prior.

“Miss Romanoff?” A timid nurse asked when Natasha crossed her path.

“Where is she?” Natasha demanded at once as she scanned the immediate area.

“Room six, but I should warn you-” the nurse called but the redhead had already started down the corridor towards your room, ignoring the warning that would have made the next few minutes marginally easier to process.

“Malysh,” Natasha breathed her first sigh of relief in a week as she stepped into your room and closed the door behind her without looking away. Your head was turned towards the window on the opposite side of the room and you didn’t acknowledge the sound of your girlfriend’s voice. Natasha simply assumed you were asleep at first and crept across the room to the chair, pausing when she saw your eyes were open but that they didn’t appear quite right. They were unfocused and frozen and the Avenger realised with a sharp pang that there was no brightness to them. It wasn’t just your eyes either.

“Hey,” your girlfriend greeted tentatively as she sat down and watched you with great apprehension. You were paler than she had ever seen and the scratches that Natasha would have usually tended to were the least of her concerns.

“Hey,” you whispered back, your gaze remaining locked on the window. Natasha willed herself to smile at the mere fact she had received some kind of response.

“It’s okay, I’m here,” she continued as she took your frail hand in her own.

“M’here,” you repeated. Natasha’s weak smile faltered.

“Y/n?” She asked, watching you closely as she felt her entire body freeze in anticipation.

“Y/n,” you repeated again though your voice was indicating that you were already growing tired. Natasha didn’t have a response of her own to that, she merely stared at the blank features of the woman she adored.

“Miss Romanoff?” A new voice called. Natasha tore her eyes away from you and turned to the door where a doctor was making her way into the room with a sympathetic smile. “I’m sure you’ve got some concerns.”

“Tell me yours first,” the redhead said adamantly, wanting answers instead of pity. Pity wasn’t going to help either of you and she needed to know what she had to do to get you back to her.

“We’re not too concerned about the physical injuries. She’s got some broken ribs and some lung damage we want to monitor but she’s going to be alright,” the doctor informed as she glanced your way.

“She doesn’t look alright,” Natasha commented bluntly.

“Look…a’right,” you echoed on cue.

“It might be shock,” the doctor said with an edge of uncertainty that told Natasha the doctor was relatively new to delivering news like that. If she wasn’t so impatient for answers she would have been gentler with the young woman.

“Or?” She pushed.

“Miss l/n is scheduled for a scan tomorrow to rule out brain damage.” An uneasy silence filled the room for a few uncomfortable moments as Natasha struggled to process what the news meant while avoiding looking directly at you, suddenly unwilling to see your dull eyes that couldn’t meet her own. But she didn’t let go of your hand, even if it was unnaturally still and cold.

“So if it’s just shock, she’ll snap out of it?” The Avenger queried, as though she wasn’t only preparing for the worst outcome. You had always been the optimist in the relationship.

“With time, yes,” the doctor confirmed with a confidence Natasha was glad to hear.

“And if it’s not,” she pushed.

“Then we’ll assess her for the best course of action.” Natasha thought that sounded as though it was fresh out of a med school textbook.

“Okay,” she nodded. “Thank you.”

“She’s in the best place right now,” the doctor added upon seeing Natasha’s clear agitation.

“Thanks,” she repeated, knowing there was no denying that fact. Even the Avengers came to hospitals when they needed urgent attention as there were only so many resources and personnel at the tower or even the S.H.I.E.L.D base.

With a polite nod, the doctor left Natasha in your company. The redhead still didn’t look at you, even when you began to mutter again. “Six’een…four…” you continued on as though you were giving your girlfriend some kind of code just to see her sweat to solve it despite spending a sleepless week doing exactly that as she pulled every recourse into finding you. She had failed. When the hospital had rang her, they told Natasha briefly about how a vehicle had pulled up just a couple feet short of the ER entrance and left you there. She hadn’t found you, your captors had simply given back your corpse.

“It’s okay,” Natasha whispered, her vision blurring as she pulled out her phone with her free hand and forced herself to do something proactive instead of just sitting there waiting to see how bad the news she would receive in a few days would be.

“S’kay,” you copied as Natasha sent out an abundance of messages to her team and other useful contacts about your arrival at the hospital, willing at least one of them to be able to track down the people in that vehicle. She couldn’t let herself be consumed by anger and revenge in that moment, not when she needed to stay by your side, but Natasha found it challenging to put those impulse feelings aside when your hand felt weightless. She brought your knuckles up to her lips and placed a tender kiss to them just as a tear rolled onto your hand.

“Yeah,” she breathed out, letting herself imagine for a moment that your words were your own. “You’re gonna get better and we’ll go home and I think we should go away on a trip once you feel up for it,” she continued to believe.

“Trip,” you picked up.

“Exactly, baby,” Natasha smiled through her increasing tears. Your face remained blank.

Natasha stayed in that uncomfortable hospital chair for the rest of the day and through another sleepless night with you. Once it got past midnight and you showed no signs of taking your focus off of the window and letting yourself rest, one of the nurses gave you some medication to help and an hour later you were finally asleep. She should have been relieved at the sight, but it only made Natasha wonder how much of your time away you had spent unconscious. What the fuck had they done to you? Maybe it was for the best that she didn’t know until you were ready to tell her about it, though that was hard to believe given how many torture methods Natasha knew of and could picture vividly being inflicted on you. She always thought she could keep you safe from ever being subject to those darker horrors in the world, and instead it had made you captive to them.

“I can feel your insomnia from here,” Wanda called, snapping Natasha out of one of her rare trances of being stuck in her own head. “Sorry, I knocked,” the Sokovian added as she lingered by the door and her gaze flickered to you. “They told me what’s going on,” Wanda continued as she made her way across the room to the chair next to Natasha. “You should go home and get some rest while she’s getting the scan. I’ll stay,” she offered as she sat down and finally looked at you properly. The shock that flashed quickly across her features was not lost on Natasha.

“Sixteen…four…thirty…” you muttered as you stared straight ahead.

“She keeps doing that,” Natasha said. “Can’t you do something?” It was the first time Wanda had ever heard her mentor sound so helpless and it took her a moment to force herself not to give Natasha a sympathetic smile. “Can’t you just reach in and pull her out?” The redhead continued as she stared at Wanda.

“I don’t think I should risk making it worse,” the brunette admitted as you continued to mutter disjointed numbers to yourself.

“You think that’s possible?” Natasha asked with a hint of disdain. Wanda knew her teammate wasn’t frustrated at you, but if she allowed her sleep deprived state to take control of her emotions then she would only become more bitter.

“I think that her mind is fragile and now is not the time to go rooting around in it,” Wanda stated with a bluntness that Natasha needed to hear. She didn’t respond and the pair sat in silence for a while until several nurses came into the room to take you away and Natasha immediately stood up to follow. “Nat,” Wanda called with a gentle hold on her arm. “Go home. We’re not going to get any answers straight away and if we do I’ll call you,” Wanda tried to reason but the redhead refused without any real consideration.

“Can you just get some clean clothes and my toothbrush? I’m not going anywhere,” Natasha insisted as she went to follow the nurses but Wanda pulled her back once more. Natasha felt her anger boil over and was about to make some demands she would regret but thankfully never got the chance to voice them because Wanda pulled her into a tight hug. She froze instinctively until her muscles trembled under the stress and embraced the younger hero.

“I don’t know what to do without her,” Natasha admitted as tears welled in her eyes for the umpteenth time.

“She’ll be back soon and she’ll need you when she is. Go get some rest,” Wanda spoke into her shoulder until Natasha gradually pulled away with a weak smile.

“Not yet,” she said, wiping her tears defiantly and starting down the hall after you.

“So she’s fine?” Natasha asked as she stared down at your unchanged features several days later. She frowned, admittedly having only prepared herself for the worst possible answers from the doctors and wasn’t quite sure how to handle the fact that you were merely in deep shock. It was good news, of course. It was just something that no amount of medicine would cure, nor was there a clear path for Natasha to walk with you to bring you back to your original state. How was she meant to find you?

“We’re arranging some meetings for her to see a psychologist and ideally she’ll be discharged in a few days,” the doctor informed.

“Right,” Natasha muttered. Bringing you home would be for the best. You would rest in your own bed, eat your comfort food and watch your favourite shows. She would run you a bath and use your favourite bubblebath that had been discontinued months ago when Natasha had hidden one away for when she thought you would need it most. She would take you on the walk routes you always enjoyed the most and hold your hand tight so that you had nothing to fear. She’d listen when you were eventually ready to talk about your week away. She would help you get better.

You stirred from your sleep and Natasha observed you closely. Usually she didn’t even realise when you woke up because you remained just as still until you began to mutter again, but that time you shifted in the bed and the only sound to be heard was the small grunt of discomfort at the back of your throat. “Detka?” Your girlfriend called.When your eyes slowly opened, they met hers. “Hey,” she greeted with a smile of relief and moved closer, causing the chair to screech and you to flinch. Natasha winced at your reaction but didn’t let it deter her. “How are you feeling?” She asked, taking your change as hope that you would respond.

“Tired,” you whispered as you took in her dishevelled appearance. She was still the most beautiful woman you had ever seen. You reached out tentatively and stroked her cheek with the back of your pointer finger, finding her soft skin to be the familiarity you needed along with her voice and smile.

“I bet,” she chuckled softly. You looked exhausted though she would never tell you that. “I missed you,” she told you, searching your eyes for the glimmer of adoration she always saw in them when you looked at her. They were just as dull as they had been a few days prior and when you offered her a small smile, that also failed to reach your eyes.

She’s been through a lot, Natasha told herself when she felt her uneasiness arise. “They said you can come home soon,” she told you when you didn’t respond. You nodded a little and looked away from the redhead to take in the small room and the busy hallway outside. Natasha watched as you turned your attention elsewhere and tried to push aside the pang she felt in her chest. There were a lot of feelings coming too close to the surface that she didn’t want or expect. Nothing about the scenes that had been playing out in that hospital bed had been as Natsha expected.

“Do you want me to get someone?” Natasha asked in an attempt to get any kind of response from you again but you simply shook your head. For the first time since Natasha had met you, she didn’t know what to say.

“You look tired,” you commented after several silent minutes.

“I haven’t slept,” Natasha admitted with an honesty she had always promised to have about her wellbeing.

“Maybe you should go home,” you said without looking at her. Your girlfriend stared at your side profile, not quite believing what you had said. Did you not want her there?

“Are you sure?” She asked, not having anticipated leaving the hospital grounds unless you were with her.

“Yeah, go get some sleep,” you encouraged with another disguised smile.

“Okay,” Natasha said, standing slowly. “Just call me if you need me,” she placed your phone down on the bed next to you. The screen had been replaced. It used to be covered in scratches but perhaps it had cracked badly when you were taken so Natasha had it fixed. Or maybe it was a new phone entirely.

“Yeah,” you agreed though somehow Natasha wasn’t convinced you would.

“I love you,” she told you at the door.

“I love you too,” you didn’t hesitate to reply and noticed the redhead’s shoulders dip slightly. You felt bad at that, knowing that in practically asking her to go you were giving her more reason to worry when she had no doubt done enough of that, but you couldn’t bring yourself to handle her doting presence in that moment.

You were overwhelmed and struggling to ignore the flashes of your captivity as bile rose in your throat. You weren’t there anymore, you were safe. There was no reason to keep thinking about it, but you couldn’t stop. Sixteen. It was far too much, too intense. The room was too bright and even Natasha’s lingering presence filled the space too much after so much solitude. Four. It was too loud outside, too open, too much air, not enough. I can’t breathe. Then the machines next to you joined the chaos and suddenly you weren’t alone again. There was so much going on, so much to process. Voices were calling but you didn't want to listen.

I can’t do this, just turn it all off.

And then it was settled. Everything was peaceful and indifferent. It was manageable and the storm finally stilled. You breathed out and felt the air rush gently past your lips as you settled back into the pillow that cushioned your head and felt the sheets under your fingertips. It’s okay, you thought even though you couldn’t quite place how you ended up in a hospital bed.

Sixteen, four, thirty, nine. That was all you could recall.

The memories returned in patches throughout the day, building and building until you found yourself far too high up and stumbled off of that sharp ledge again. That happened four more times before you went home.

Natasha was good to you as you recovered. Too good. She was patient, understanding, helpful and incredibly caring and you offered her very little in response. She continued to come and visit you though only for a few hours at a time, able to tell when you became too tired and had enough of any company. It hurt her everytime she left, more so as she didn’t know it hurt you too. You didn’t know how to tell her that. You didn’t know how to express how overwhelming it was to have the flashes of your torture strike you like a knife even though you were always waiting on edge for it to hit.

Natasha wasn’t entirely oblivious to it all. She saw how your heartbeat was always unusually high on the monitors just like your blood pressure when anyone came to check it. She knew that you didn’t sleep unless you were given something to help and that you rejected the tablets more often than not. She noticed how you constantly eyed the door and the tiles in the ceiling. She knew that you weren’t eating or drinking enough and how laboursome it was just to go to the bathroom and back. Your girlfriend could tell you were struggling, she just didn’t know how much because you wouldn’t tell her.

On the day you were discharged, you dreaded going home because it would be harder for you to hide your episodes and nightmares Natasha had yet to witness. You felt guilty for not seeking comfort in your shared apartment with your girlfriend and you really couldn’t have asked for her to be any more supportive about the whole ordeal, so why couldn’t you simply lean into it?

The first thing you noticed when you stepped into your apartment was the strong smell of disinfectant that meant Natasha had gone on one of her cleaning frenzies in your absence. She only ever did that on the rare occasions she had some time off from work and you weren’t around and once you had even come back to her scrubbing the ceiling. You had told her to get a hobby and she had threatened to throw the bowl of dirty was over you.

Natasha began saying something about ordering takeout to which you silently nodded as you took in the apartment like the first day you moved in together. It didn’t have the same homey feeling you once got the moment you stepped through the door, nor did it provide you the same comfort you could seek after a hard day. First your girlfriend and then your home, why did nothing so stable and familiar feel safe? You breathed out steadily, heading for the bathroom as you felt the panic spread through your nerves and missing Natasha’s concern as she watched you go.

The rest of the evening continued on those unsteady grounds that the redhead was cautious to step on. Once the meal arrived and Natasha put one of your favourite shows on the tv, she sat down on the sofa you always curled up together on and stared at her food container when she noticed you sit down on the arm chair that only ever seemed to be used by guests. You didn’t acknowledge the tv much and only picked at your food, feeling Natasha’s gaze on you even when she tried to be subtle. You never used to, but your paranoia made you conscious of things like that.

“Do you want me to run you a bath? I kept a bottle of that bubble bath that was discontinued,” Natasha offered and you suddenly became aware of how little you were giving back to her.

“No thanks,” you muttered, feeling a queasiness come on.

“What can I do to help you?” She asked after a long beat passed. You didn’t look at her because you knew that if you did you would see a face that would only make you feel more guilty. She just wanted to help and you honestly had no idea how to let her do so. “Do you want to talk to Kate? Or Wanda? Or-” Natasha suggested after sumising that you weren’t going to open up to her any time soon and she didn’t want you to keep things to yourself longer than necessary.

“No,” you cut her off. You had absolutely no intention of reliving the past week to anyone, you just wanted to forget about it.

“That therapist’s office isn’t far and it’s not until late morning so I was thinking we could-”

“I’m not going,” you interrupted again and carried the first clear defiance Natasha had seen on you in months.

“Why?” She pushed with a frown.

“I don’t want to talk to a shrink,” you insisted. The irony of that wasn’t lost on the redhead. She had said the same thing numerous times ever since she joined S.H.I.E.L.D.

“You should talk to someone,” Natasha pushed, unknowingly aggravating you further.

“Why? It won’t change anything. Most of the time I can’t remember it anyway,” you told her as you actively avoided her searching gaze.

“That sounds like all the more reason to go,” Natasha frowned. She was no psychologist herself, but she knew that wasn’t normal. “Please, y/n,” she pushed as new worries sprang to the front of her mind.

“No, Nat. It’s my choice,” you snapped, putting your mostly untouched meal down and getting up from the chair without letting your girlfriend get another word in.

“Fuck,” Natasha muttered as she heard you close the bedroom door, making your message clear. She’s pushing me away, Natasha realised with a sense of dread, and it was because she was trying to help.

Natasha slept on the sofa that night, forcing herself to give you the space you clearly needed. She was restless and awake more than asleep as she considered everything she could that you would want. It shouldn’t have been so hard for someone who had known you for so many years and dated you for three of them to figure out what support you needed, until Natasha recalled the dullness that hadn’t lifted from your eyes in the past week. It wasn’t the you she was used to, it was someone else, someone she didn’t know.

The moment a small whimper could be heard from the bedroom, the spy sat bolt upright on the sofa and listened closely for you, finetuning her senses the way she had been trained to. Another whimper closely followed and Natasha’s fears forced her to her feet and through the apartment, anticipating the worst as she grabbed the handgun concealed in the kitchen and threw open the bedroom door. She didn’t relax when she assessed that you weren’t in danger, finding your distress equally alarming.

“Hey,” Natasha said gently as she put the gun down and crouched in front of your sweating form. You were crying out weakly as you struggled against the duvet you had gotten wrapped around you in your unconscious panic. Natasha swiftly untangled you from your bindings and in doing so woke you up. The way you kicked away from your girlfriend upon seeing her stand over you would be an image Natasha wouldn’t be able to forget for some time, even as she gave you her assurance. “It’s just me, you’re safe,” she told you.

You panted as you stared back at Natasha with wide eyes until it eventually clocked in your mind that her words were the truth. “Hey,” she greeted again as she tentatively sat on the edge of the bed. You made no move to embrace her like you used to after a bad dream, only glancing around the room as your breathing began to steady. “If you want to talk about it I’m-”

“No,” you denied without hearing her out. “But…” you started with uncertainty. “If you want to stay…” you shrugged and Natasha understood that that was the closest she was going to get to an invitation. She smiled in the dark and slipped into the bed beside you as you lay back down without closing the space that seemed too grande to the redhead and cramped to you. It was a compromise that Natasha hoped would put you on the right track.

Another week passed without any progress on finding your captors. Natasha rarely left the apartment so all of the chasing she did was done on her own laptop from the sofa while you distanced yourself in the bedroom. She had agents and teammates following up on any leads she found but they all came up empty. The redhead had only asked you once if there were any details about your captors or where you were kept that you could remember though you shut her down quick enough for Natasha to know it was best not to ask again.

Natasha was beginning to suspect that the only way she could bring you any comfort was to kill the people that took you because you were responding less and less to her approaches while isolating yourself more. You wouldn’t go to therapy, even when it was suggested you could attend online and you declined any visitors that came to see you. You rarely stepped foot outside the bedroom and never left the apartment. You weren’t eating or drinking enough or washing as much as you used to. You didn’t even show any interest in the tv, adamant on spending most hours in bed by yourself. You wouldn’t let her comfort you after your nightmares and had yet to witness any of your episodes that you locked yourself in the bathroom to endure. You wouldn’t accept help and you weren’t getting better.

“Hi,” Wanda greeted Natasha with a warm hug.

“Thanks for coming,” the redhead said as she glanced in the direction of your room that was starting to feel less like a shared space. “She won’t want to see you though,” Natasha warned.

“I remember how that felt,” Wanda shrugged simply. “She needs this,” she said as she walked through the apartment with Natasha following a few steps behind.

“Hey, y/n,” Wanda greeted gently after knocking several times. Natasha watched from the doorway as the younger hero ventured into the dark room and over to the curtains that she pulled back half way. You didn’t respond, merely pulling the duvet up in hopes that Wanda would take the hint and leave you alone. She didn’t, deciding to open a window an inch to let the cool autumn air in.

“I brought you bubble tea,” she said as she placed the peace offering down on the bedside table next to you. “I thought you could use it,” she added as she sat down on the floor next to your side of the bed, content to keep talking to you for a while even if you weren’t going to answer. She knew that you were awake.

“Kate’s been asking after you,” the Sokovian continued. “They all have actually, but Kate the most.” You didn’t want to see them. You didn’t want to see anyone. You were fully aware that you weren’t the same person that they knew and you didn’t know how to get that person back. It would only be so long before they all grew tired of who you were becoming, especially when they finally realised that their attempts to help you were futile. You didn’t think Natasha was far off from that conclusion herself and as much as you wanted to stop it happening, you simply didn’t have the energy.

Your girlfriend shifted her weight as she watched from the doorway and Wanda nodded at her to give you both some time. She closed the door behind her though Wanda felt her linger outside for a moment before leaving. “She wants to help,” Wanda told you. “You need help, y/n.” You pulled the duvet down slightly and opened your eyes for Wanda to offer you a small smile.

“I’m just so tired,” you whispered hopelessly.

“I know. It’s exhausting having to relive it constantly,” Wanda admitted. “That’s why you need to get out of bed and focus on something else.”

“Then talk to a shrink to bring it back up again?” You questioned sceptically.

“To help you manage it,” she corrected. You weren’t convinced, but you reached for the drink and took a sip of the sweet liquid that touched your dehydration. “Do you want help having a shower or bath?” Wanda offered.

“Maybe tomorrow,” you dismissed.

“I’ll hold you to that,” Wanda insisted with a smile you couldn’t return. She stayed with you for a while longer, though after that your responses grew thinner and thinner until eventually Wanda said goodbye and left you to fall back into a shallow slumber.

“How is she?” Natasha asked when she saw Wanda reamurge.

“Struggling,” Wanda admitted. “I’m going to come back tomorrow though and see if I can get her up.” Natasha nodded, thinning that it would be good for someone other than her to try and get you out of bed. “How are you doing?” The brunette asked with concern.

“I’ll be okay when she is,” Natasha dismissed.

“You need to look after yourself too though,” Wanda pointed out though she could tell that was the least of her mentor’s concerns. “Any new leads?”

“All dead ends,” Natasha huffed. “Fuckers.”

“We’ve got the best people on it, we’ll get them,” Wanda assured. Natasha wasn’t sure she could wholly believe that, but it was all she had to cling onto in hopes of getting you back. “I’ll see you tomorrow. Call if you need me,” Wanda said with a supportive smile that lifted Natasha’s spirits more than anything else had that day. Unfortunately, her hopes that Wanda was what you needed were humbled the next day when the Sokovian stepped foot inside your bedroom again to find you far less reluctant than the day prior.

“Come on, y/n. You agreed,” Wanda tried to reason calmly though it did nothing to ease the temper you seemed to have woken up with.

“I’m not a child,” you snapped. “I’ll get up when I’m ready.” Natasha watched from the doorway as the younger Avenger didn’t allow her patience to waver.

“You’ll feel better once you’ve had a wash and we can change the sheets so you-”

“Leave me alone,” you interrupted with desperation, too embarrassed to admit that the thought of just having a brief wash was too much. Something that used to be so thoughtless and simple had turned into anything but as you anticipated every step involved now that you weren’t moving on autopilot anymore. Even the thought of changing your clothes and coming back to clean sheets you used to love the smell of seemed as though it would just be a disruption to the only safe space you had. There were too many changes, too much going on and too many thoughts.

Then, like a punch to the gut, your mind replayed how you had been washed when you were taken and it was so surreal that you swore your skin ached as it recalled how strong the water hose had been and how it had been so cold that there might as well have been spikes of ice in that water that sliced you. You never even fully dried in the damp room before it happened again. Sixteen. “Four…thirty,” you muttered as you hugged your knees and fought back the memories that flooded past your barricades. “Nine,” you continued in search of something to ground yourself to.

“Y/n?” Wanda noticed your trembles grow as you blocked out the world around you and incidentally kept everything you were trying to escape in. Trapped with them. Again.

“Sixteen…four,” you repeated over and over like a charm to ward off evil but you just weren’t strong enough on your own.

“Honey, breathe,” Wanda coaxed but you couldn’t hear her or your girlfriend as she crouched by your sides and tried to take a hold of your shaking hands.

“Nine,” you muttered for the last time when suddenly it was all gone and you were back in the room with the two women who noticed the change immediately.

“Malysh?” Natasha was the first to speak.

“Hey,” you greeted with a sleepy smile.

“What’s going on?” She asked, trying to appear far more calm than she was.

“Don’t know,” you admitted with a frown.

“How do you feel?” Wanda added.

“I’m not sure,” you admitted with an uncomfortable uncertainty, feeling that brief stillness become disturbed.

“Maybe you should jump in the shower to wake yourself up a bit,” Natasha suggested. You paused, trying to place your finger on why that suggestion didn’t feel right but when you couldn’t identify any legitimate reason not to, you agreed, missing the look exchanged between the pair as you got up and trudged through the apartment to the bathroom.

“I’ve got it,” you dismissed when you noticed Natasha trying to join you. She nodded respectfully as you closed the door, then peered back into the bedroom where Wanda remained as puzzled as she was.

“What the hell was that? I’ve seen her have panic attacks before but that was different,” Natasha stated as the pair began stripping the bed as swiftly as they could.

“I don’t know,” Wanda muttered, stuck with the image of your distress.

“Wands, can’t you do something?” Natasha asked not for the first time.

“You know it’s not ethical.”

“But letting her suffer is? She needs meds but without going to the doctor she won’t get them,” Natasha pointed out though that very fact had been on Wanda’s mind for the past few days. She had considered trying to use her powers on your mind to relieve some of the tension your memories placed on it, but she had never done anything like that before and it wasn’t the time to try.

“She responds more to you than she has to me ever since she came home,” the widow voiced with a jealousy she knew she had no right to express, but it hurt to see that your friend was somehow doing more for you than she was.

“Maybe I just got to her on a better day,” Wanda shrugged in an effort to appease the redhead. She wasn’t convinced, yet Wanda had no other answer to offer.

Meanwhile, you let the water run through the shower and stared at it with great apprehension. You didn’t make a move to take your clothes off, unable to determine why you felt so uncertain to step under the water. Hesitantly, you took your clothes off one by one as the steam began to fill the room and stuck your hand under the water once you were ready, only to withdraw it with a sharp hiss. You turned the temperature down, waited several moments, and tried again. Better. A lot better once you were under the shower entirely. You dipped your head and allowed yourself some time to let the warm water cleanse your body tenderly then got to work with the soap.

“I’ve got you some clothes,” Natasha called from behind the door once you turned the water off. Wrapping a towel around yourself, you opened the door several inches and took the clothes with a muttered ‘thanks’ that your girlfriend almost missed. You dressed swiftly and when you were done you stepped out to see that the bed had been made up with fresh sheets and there was a hearty smell of a home cooked meal filling the apartment. You immediately recognised it to be one of Wanda’s Sokovian dishes that she always enjoyed cooking for the team and must have made extra to bring back for you and Nat.

“Hungry?” She asked when she noticed you eyeing up the dish she was reheating the meal in.

“A little,” you admitted. Even with the enticing smells that greeted you, you didn’t have much of an appetite. “Aren't you meant to have this one with red wine?” Natasha’s eyes snapped to you and Wanda paused briefly. You looked between the two and rolled your eyes, knowing what they were thinking but walking over to the cupboard to retrieve the bottle anyway.

“Not necessarily,” Wanda said a moment too late. Your mind was made up and after two weeks hiding out in bed, you just wanted to feel like you were having a normal meal with your friends.

“But preferably,” you countered as you placed the three glasses and bottle on the coffee table, entirely aware of the look the pair exchanged when your back was turned.

“Maybe we should save it for another night,” Natasha suggested.

“Guys, it’s fine,” you insisted as you poured yourself a glass and wished they would both stop looking at you like that. Regrettably, the pair gave in as they plated up the three dishes and brought them over to eat in front of the tv. You remained in the armchair, as you always did, and although Natasha would have much preferred to feel you curl up with her, having Wanda accompany her on the lonesome sofa was a nice change.

The two avengers barely touched their drinks though your glass was empty by the time you decided you were done forcing yourself to eat more than you could stomach. After the faint buzz hit you, you wanted to polish off their glasses for them, but you knew that in doing so you would be trying your luck with the pair. You were playing a dangerous game as it was, but for the rest of the evening, neither of them mentioned it.

Wanda went home not long after you all finished clearing away and you wondered how long you could leave it before retiring to bed yourself and whether or not to let Natasha know she was welcome to join you. For sleep only. You hadn’t let her touch you since the hospital, shying away from all physical contact despite the way it made your girlfriend wince. You knew that your slow progress was hurting her because she felt responsible, but you still couldn’t snap yourself out of the trance that made anything comfortable feel painful. You couldn’t quite wrap your head around it yourself, especially as every time you tried it sent you into a spiral that ended with you struggling for air.

“I think I’m gonna watch some tv in bed for a bit,” you told Natasha. She looked up at you with an understanding smile. God, she’s too good to me. When will she realise that?

“Okay.” You lingered in the doorway.

“Wanna join?” You asked as you picked at the wood in the frame and noticed your girlfriend’s features brighten.

“Yeah, I’ll be in soon,” she told you with a beam as she finished up the work she had only just begun on her laptop. All for you, of course.

By the time Natasha joined you, you were in bed but still scrolling through the shows and films offered to you and ended up letting the redhead decide on something. “You did good today,” she told you once the show started playing.

“Thanks,” you muttered, unsure what else you could say.

“If you want to go out tomorrow, I’d be happy to go with you,” she continued. “Even just for a small walk.” You nodded, but the unease you felt told you that wouldn’t be happening. “If you want to,” she added, probably noticing your hesitation. You should have taken her up on the offer and you did miss being outside, but the mere thought of stepping out of the safety of your apartment made you feel sick. There was no telling what awaited you and there was no guarantee that Natasha could prevent it.

“Are you missing anything important at work?” You queried, though the change in subject wasn’t lost on Natasha.

“There’s a few other Avengers and an entire organisation that are filling in for me,” she quipped off handedly. You hummed.

“But you’re a workaholic,” you pointed out not for the first time since you started dating the redhead. “I feel bad that I’m keeping you here.”

“You’re not,” she was quick to input, even though you both knew that was a lie.

“Okay, let’s say I’m not. Shouldn’t I be trying to like…do things on my own?” You asked. Natasha paused and wondered if you were trying to push her further out of your space. It wasn’t, not consciously, and she seemed to buy that when you glanced her way.

“Maybe I could go in for a few hours tomorrow,” she tested for your reaction. “I’ll keep my phone on.”

“Okay,” you half smiled and settled into the bed more with a strong sense of apprehension as to whether or not you had made the right choice in trying to get Natasha out of the apartment for a few hours.

You didn’t sleep much that night and you knew that Natasha didn’t either. There was an anxious hum that charged above your bed as you both thought about what your days would entail without one another. Natasha would be thinking of you constantly and it didn’t help that you had recently developed the habit of ignoring your texts. You, on the other hand, realised that you weren’t going to be entirely sure of what to do with your privacy, but you did want it. Natasha clearly wasn’t as keen because the next morning she must have assured you five times that her phone would be on and that you could call whenever you needed her, or anyone else. It was the first time you had ever watched her leave later than planned.

You admired the stillness of the apartment for a while. The busy hum of the city on the other side of those walls continued to emanate through, but the apartment itself was entirely void of the frantic energy it had been consumed in for the last few weeks. It was finally just you. You enjoyed that fact for the first half an hour, wandering freely through the space and relishing in your own company, until your mind had enough of the rare peace and insisted you return to panic.

Suddenly, you vividly recalled what it had been like the last time you were entirely alone. You unwillingly thought back on the gas that had been expelled into the black box you were contained in and how soon the chemicals had dug their way into your conscience to twist it in the most unnatural fashion. You remembered how it had fried all logic and precisely compromised every one of your senses that still felt surreal. You recollected the feeble attempts you made to cling onto what you knew to be real but that it proved impossible when the enemy you were losing to was yourself.

Sixteen. Four. Thirty. Nine.

Your head was spinning wildly as you stumbled into the kitchen. Your memories forced themselves so far to the front of your brain that you weren’t even sure of what you were doing when you swiped at one of the cupboards and accidentally threw it open. The sunlight streaming into the apartment caught onto the bottles and without a moment’s consideration, you grabbed the nearest one and took a sip. Then another. Then another as you dropped to the floor and begged for the alcohol to tackle your thoughts for you. You couldn’t do it alone.

More sips until eventually a light fog began to blur the images behind your eyes. It still wasn’t enough so you continued until the fog grew heavier and the images were finally obstructed. It wasn’t a victory by any means. It was simply a rest. The best one you had had since you were left outside the hospital.

You glanced down at the light bottle and realised with a drop that it was empty. Natasha would surely notice a missing bottle given that you didn’t keep many so you quickly took out your phone, ignoring the various messages, and ordered another one for you to swap out. It was only once you paid an additional fee for it to be delivered within the next ten minutes did you realise that you were going to have to leave the apartment to retrieve it downstairs. It was a daunting thought, but you were all too aware that it seemed far more manageable with the liquid courage in your system.

Fortunately, it didn’t take more than five minutes for you to descend the five flights of stairs, bin the bottle, retrieve the new one and scale back up to your apartment. Though your heart had been pounding the entire time, you felt good that you had managed to pull it off successfully and in the midst of the relief, you hadn’t even taken a moment to consider that the stress of what you had done was because it wasn’t right. All of that was to avoid your girlfriend finding out that you had been drinking, yet you never gave a second thought to it when your head felt lighter on your shoulders than you could recall it being in a while.

You emptied part of the bottle and placed it back where the previous one was with a sense of satisfaction before sitting in the armchair for your last hour of peace. With the slight intoxication, it went by faster than you anticipated. Maybe it was also down to the alcohol, but when Natasha stepped through the doorway and set her eyes on you, her expression was unreadable.

“Hi,” you greeted with some uncertainty.

“Hey,” she muttered back as she took her jacket off. You couldn’t help but think back on how you used to greet each other when you got home. A tight hug, a small kiss that usually led to more, conversation, smiles, laughter. Love. You felt your gut twist uncomfortably as Natasha trudged through the apartment to the kitchen without looking at you. It seemed as though the moment you had been awaiting was growing closer. Natasha had enough. You had to give her credit for dealing with you as long as she did. That should have been your cue to stop her and start to put things right, but you couldn’t do that to her, you couldn’t get her to carry the dead weight much longer. It wasn’t fair.

“How’ve you been?” She asked from the kitchen.

“Okay,” you answered, pulling at a thread in the armchair. “How was work?” It was a small domestic attempt Natasha took no notice of.

“I texted you,” she told you instead. “Called a few times too.”

“My phone’s on silent.”

“Then what’s the point in having it?” She asked, her voice full of unspoken accusations without realising how right she was.

To order booze behind your back. You didn’t answer and Natasha didn’t follow up.

You didn’t say another word to one another that night and the tension that filled the apartment was almost suffocating. The alcohol in your system wore off far too quickly for your liking and made the evening considerably tougher. You considered, countless times, going to your girlfriend to explain yourself to her. But how could you? How could you tell her that you had seen her, and many many others, in that basement where you were kept? How could you tell her that you had lived out your darkest nightmares and that she had been right there inflicting them? How could you tell your girlfriend that even though you knew none of it was real, you were scared of her? You never did and as the days blurred into weeks, the tension in your apartment reached its long awaited breaking point.

If you were being completely honest with yourself, you started to depend on the drinks. You never let yourself think about it long enough to conclude that what you were doing was wrong, not when the result of it was the only respite you ever got from your mind. You could never drink Natasha’s surveillance, but it didn’t prove to be a problem when your girlfriend fell into her own harmful habit of spending most of her time and work. She didn’t want to be around you.

You stopped forgetting about what happened once you were reacquainted with the entire collection of memories of what happened. There were no brief moments where you couldn’t recall your torment ever happening, leaving your only respite to be alcohol. You didn’t intend to depend on it, but you did.

Natasha never noticed. On the days where you had too much, you simply put yourself to bed after brushing the taste and smell of alcohol away and it was too easy for Natasha to perceive it as ‘one of those days’. You rarely spoke to each other. You rarely looked at each other. You both allowed for your love to be buried on the rubble of the ruins you created, still alive and too stubborn to let go but lost from view.

One night, you let yourself get too carried away. You were slumped against the cupboards on the kitchen floor as you tried to make sense of the spinning apartment when Natasha came home. She froze at the sight of you clutching her vodka bottle that you always claimed to hate the taste of. You had grown numb to it recently.

Your girlfriend stepped towards you cautiously and crouched down as you registered her presence with the same far away look in your eyes she had seen in the hospital. She thought about it every day. “Y/n?” She asked as she gently grabbed the bottle but you yanked it out of her grasp and back towards your chest. “Don’t do that,” she muttered, heart cracking as she took in your unkempt appearance. How had she let you get like this? You grumbled incoherently in response.

“Come on, you need to throw up,” she coaxed, trying to keep her voice steady as she placed a hand on your arm but you shrugged her off. “Why won’t you let me help you?” She sighed, not expecting a response.

“Why do you want to?” You bite, eyes holding a harshness Natasha had never seen in you.

“Because I care about you, y/n,” she tried. “I love you and I want you to come back to me,” the redhead admitted with a crushing desperation. You loved her too, so much, but you were drunk and you were pissed off at the world.

“Is that it? Really?” You interrogated with an obnoxious slur to your speech. “It’s not because of any guilt you might be feeling?” Natasha frowned and backed away slightly as she stared down at you. “Tell me honestly.”

“I wish I had been there-” She tried, no stranger to the guilt you were inflicting.

“Why would that have mattered? They would have just seen you and tried again another time,” you told her as you grabbed at the kitchen counter behind you and hauled yourself up onto unstable feet. Natasha immediately sprang to catch you as you toppled.

“Y/n-”

“Don’t touch me!” You screamed as you gripped the counter with a steel force and glared at the woman desperately trying to help you. “I can’t look at you without seeing them.” You muttered though the words were etched into Natasha. She unknowingly held her breath as she processed what you had just said and realised she had finally gotten her answer as to why you were so distant. “Leave,” you spat.

“What?” The redhead felt her legs become numb.

“I can’t do this. I can’t continue to be a target,” you told her as your fear creeped into your drunken resentment and it all came to the surface unceremoniously.

“What do you mean?” She whispered despite already knowing.

“It’s your fault. They took me to get to you and you didn’t even come and save me,” you told her, tears streaming down your face that your girlfriend so desperately wanted to wipe away as she held you.

“I tried, I tried so hard,” Natasha told you as her voice shook as much as her hands that she fought to keep by her sides. “I did everything I could and-”

“And in the end they just gave me back. What if the next ones don’t feel so generous?” You questioned, unrelenting in your pain you were pushing onto your partner in an effort to escape it yourself.

“We’ll figure something out, I’ll teach you self defence,” she tried but you didn’t want to hear it.

“I thought I was going to die…and I wish I did.” Natasha stared at you through the blur of tears, knowing that you were drunk but that it didn't mean you didn’t mean it. In fact, it made undeniable sense. “I would rather be laying dead in that room right now than have endured a second of what they did.” You told her honestly. “So get out.”

“Y/n-” The attempt was futile.

“Get out!” You broke, unable to handle any more. There was no going back on what you had said and there was no undoing the past. You were done and too exhausted to see it any other way.

“I’m sorry,” Natasha whispered as she stepped away in defeat. You wouldn’t listen to reason, not from her.

“Sorry doesn’t fix what you’ve done.”

#natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff x reader #marvel #natasha x reader #black widow #natasha romanoff angst #natasha romanoff comfort #gxg marvel #natasha romanoff imagines

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nyxiswrites1200 · 6 months

Text

⛥𝑶𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒑𝒓𝒐𝒕𝒆𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒗𝒆 𝑺𝒂𝒎𝒎𝒚⛥

Sam Winchester x Fem!Reader

Warnings: NSFT, MDNI, Supernatural spoilers, Committed relationship, Mild confrontation, Mild argument, P in V, Makeup sex, Oral sex, Kisses, Pet Names, Multiple orgasms

Mentions: Early seasons Sam, Reader is feminine, Reader is mentioned to have gotten hurt in the past

AO3 Link

AN: Hello loves! This is in response to a request I got <;3 Hope you enjoy it, anon! Need Sammy to look at me like that ^ I'm gonna be working on another Sam post due to another request <3 and a Leon Kennedy one due to my recent poll results.

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Sam has been overprotective lately, more so than usual. He won't let you go on hunts. Only allowing you to stay at the motel and research things if you want. You barely snagged permission to do that much. Trying to address it only resulted in a stupid arguments, it was frustrating to say the least.

It was late into the night when you found yourself alone with Sam. He was flipping through some old book when you finally spoke up.

"Sammy..." you inquired softly to get his attention. Sam immediately turned his gaze up to meet yours. That usual soft puppy look in his eyes. "What is it, lovely?" he asked as he set his book down, sitting up on the bed with his elbows resting on his knees.

"What's been going on with you, Sam?" you asked, concern laced in your tone. He was always protective of you but not this protective. It worried you, especially knowing about his psychic dreams/visions.

Sam knew where this was going and he was starting to realize that he couldn't run from this conversation.

"Sweetheart I...I'm sorry but after that incident with the wendigo, I just can't-" he tries to explain as he runs a hand through his messy hair. "Sam, I know you were scared and that was awful but I'm fine. I understand-" your words stuttered to a stop when Sam interjected "No...no, lovely. You don't.." his voice was a bit more stern and it caught you off guard.

"After that happened...I kept having these nightmares. It ruined me because it made it too real. It made me realize that you're capable of getting hurt...or worse" he bounced his leg as he spoke. A little antic of his that you've noticed. Sam seemed to notice that he almost sounded like he was arguing with you.

"Sam, you can't-" he interjected again "No, don't say that. Don't you dare say I can't protect you from everything...because you know I will go through hell trying to." he said sternly. It made you feel guilty, he was going through all this turmoil ever since that incident; which was weeks ago at that.

Sam finally realizing maybe he wasn't approaching this the right way. He sighed as he got up and went over to you. He carefully cups your cheek as he kissed your forehead "I'm sorry...".

You look up at him as you sigh softly "No, I'm sorry, you should have told me. I didn't know that what happened was bothering you so much.". "No, lovely. I should have been honest instead of trying to just shelter you like some child...I mean, I hate when Dean does it to me" he lets out a chuckle with his signature smirk. You can't help but chuckle as well. I mean, how are you supposed to stay mad when he always has that soft look in his eyes?

"You're such an idiot" you chuckle as you lean in and kiss him sweetly. Sam smiles against your lips as he kisses you back. He wraps an arm firmly around your waist as his other hooks around the back of your neck. His thumb soothingly rubbing the side of your neck in an affectionate manner.

"I love you, sweetie..." He mumbled against your lips as he sighed in relief. He hated having tension with you. Unless it was sexual...

You were happy to have finally addressed this as well. Sam's hands worked down to the hem of your shirt, he paused for a second. Just to make sure this is what you wanted. Your response was to go and tug off his shirt, giving him the okay.

Sam tossed your shirt somewhere in the motel room as you did the same with his. Your hands are dragging up his muscular stomach. His are gripping your hips, highlighting the veins in his arms and hands. Sam pulled back from the kiss with a pant as he picked you up by your thighs.

You chuckle softly as he laid you back on the bed. He undoes the button on your jeans and tugs them off. Not wasting any time, he presses his thumb against your clothed clit and rubs at it.

You moan out as you try to grind up into his hand. "I'm sorry for arguing with you, darling..." He apologized softly but you could see that dominant glimmer in his eyes. He leaned down and pressed kisses along your throat. "Let me make it up to you..." He said softly as he kissed his way down your stomach. You let out a breathless 'yes', Sam smirks against your skin.

He kisses down your body, his hands following as they rub your sides and hips...then hook into your panties, pulling them down.

His hands wrap around your thighs, holding them firmly as he places a soft kiss into your clit. You don't hesitate to tighten your hand into his messy brown hair. "Sammy~" you moan needily. "Hmm? Too slow for you?" He teased with a smirk before burying his face against your cunt. His tongue lapping at your folds like he's starving. You moan out loudly, tugging at his hair as your thighs threaten to close but his hands keep them open.

"Good girl, baby" he mumbled against your pussy as he groaned. He buried his tongue inside you, his nose bumping against your clit.

"God- Sammy-" you felt that familiar pleasure building up as you let out a soft chuckle "Maybe we should argue more often". Sam smiled against your cunt as he looked up at you. "Fuck no, hate arguing with you sweetie" he mumbled softly.

One last suck to your clit and you toppled over the edge. A sinful moan leaving your lips as you arched into Sam.

Sam pulled away, he licked his lips that were covered in your slick. He soothingly rubbed your thighs as you came down from your high. He leaned down and kissed your lower stomach.

You looked down at him as you dragged your hand from his hair to his cheek. "Don't think I fully forgive you yet" you teased with a chuckle. Sam couldn't help but let out a small laugh as he stood up and unbuckled his belt. "Alright sweetie, I guess I need to work a little harder?" He tugged off his jeans, followed by his boxers. His hard cock perked up against his stomach, pre-cum leaking out of the tip.

You bit your bottom lip. You had a tendency to forget he was so big.

Sam carefully held your thighs as he rubbed his tip against your entrance for a moment. Then he slowly slipped his cock inside of you. A pathetic moan spilling from you as his tip kissed your cervix.

A groan leaving Sam as he felt your warm cunt tighten around him.

He leaned down, his chest pressing into yours, your thighs pressed up against you. He loved to get you into a mating press, looking at your expression as he fucked you deep.

You tug your hands into his hair as you moan out. You were so close that you both practically shared the same breaths.

"Good girl, you feel so damn good sweetheart..." He rasped as he grunted, feeling you tighten at his words "Fuck- Trying to be in my guts, Sammy?" You said breathlessly another whiny moan leaving you. Sam pressed a kiss to your lips as he fucked you harder.

The sinful sounds of his balls slapping against you and the wet squelch of your cunt around his dick.

"SamSammy- Gonna cum" you moaned as he sped up at hearing that "Go ahead, sweetie. Cum all over my cock, you deserve it."

At that, you came hard onto his dick. Sam's hips stuttered as you finished. He went to pull out, trying to be respectful but you weren't having it today. You hooked your tugged at his hair, pulling him in as you whined.

"No no- Inside, fuck I need it inside-" you stutter as Sam groans "Sweetie I-" you fuck yourself back onto his cock. "Fuck" he almost whimpered as he thrusted hard into you a few times before he came inside of your pussy.

You shivered in pleasure as you felt his cum spill into you.

Sam panted for a moment, his hands mindlessly rubbing your hips before he slowly pulled out. Some of his cum leaking out of you. His cock covered in your slick.

He laid his head against your chest, not putting all of his weight on you of course. "Am I forgiven?" He chuckles softly. You smile and gently rub the back of his head, playing in his hair. "Of course, baby"

Sam relaxed for a minute, just enjoying your affection. He then sat up as he kissed your cheek "Ready for a bath?"

#fanfic writer #my writing #archive of our own #reader insert #supernatural fandom #supernatural x reader #supernatural fanfiction #supernatural #sam winchester x you #sam winchester x reader #sam winchester smut #sam winchester fanfiction #sam winchester #fem reader #my new obsession #request #request response

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spicysix · 1 year

Note

📖 + "I think... I'm in love with (Name)" || "Congrats on being the last one to find out" prompt w eddie omgomgomg💗 also congrats on 400 angel <33

thank you my loveee 💖💖💖

here comes, hope you like it! (a little dialogue heavy, sorry for that!)

join the celebration!

every day for us, something new

"Gonna make some more popcorn, guys! Get the next one ready," you said, getting up from the couch where you were sitting between Eddie and Argyle.

"Get me another coke, please!" Robin, from the floor, asked.

"Oh, get me another beer, sweetums, will 'ya?" Eddie joined in.

"No one else ask me anything, I don't have hands for more!" you exclaimed before leaving for the kitchen.

Movie nights were routine at this point. After all the trauma and the babysitting and the saving the world, the least you all deserved were some fun nights chilling with your friends. Steve or Nancy would host, you'd all take turns choosing movies for the week, and you'd get together to watch and gossip and just be around each other in non-threatening ways. There was no bond like the one created between life-or-death situations.

Eddie's eyes followed you as you walked out of Steve's living room. Jonathan chuckled.

"What?" Eddie asked and Nancy and Robin groaned in unison.

"You are. So. Dense," Nancy complained.

"I don't think he's dense, I think he's just stupid," Robin completed. Eddie hated how she and Nancy came to sharing a single braincell lately.

"C'mon, let's take it easy on our brochacho. The matters of the heart aren't easy," Argyle said, words all considerate but his smirk was nothing but teasing, and Eddie wanted them all to just shut the fuck up.

There was a loud noise from the kitchen, and Eddie was up on his feet in an instant.

"Don't worry, I'm okay!" you called out before anyone could even say anything, to Eddie's relief, and he sat down again.

All of his friends were looking at him funny. What was this plot against him, honestly?

"What's going on?" he asked, waving his arms around in annoyance.

"Dude. Use a single neuron. You'll understand," Steve advised, letting out a dramatically exhausted sigh.

Eddie just stared back at them, one at a time, for several minutes. Trying to find the answers in one of his friends' eyes, or just hoping to be scary enough to make them tell him at once.

"I can't do this, he's the dumbest man alive," Jonathan said after a long while in silence.

What were you even doing in the kitchen for such a long time? Popcorn gets ready in like, five minutes.

"He's never been in love before, maybe he just doesn't recognize it," Steve pitched in, and he knew that information because Eddie had told him once.

What did it have to do with anything?

"What does being in love has anything to do with this? Who's in love here? No one's in lov-" he started, and then he stopped.

Thought about your smile, and that funny little laugh you saved only for his stupid jokes. The way you'd hug him tighter and longer than everyone else. The way you and Robin shared perfumes, a fragrance he didn't really like much, but on you he'd love - something about the way it'd interact with your natural skin smell, and it intoxicated him in the best of ways. He thought about how soft your skin was, and how he loved when you ran your fingers through his hair. He thought about how he thought about you first thing when he woke up, and he thought about you last thing before sleeping. How he thought about you even when asleep - how he'd dream of you, and him, your hands clasped together, your lips on his.

"Oh my god, I think I'm in love," he muttered.

"Congrats on being the last one to find out," Nancy answered. He just looked at her, freezing, hands trembling a little. "What are you thinking about so much, just go!" She nodded at the kitchen and, once again, Eddie was up on his feet in an instant.

He practically ran to the other room.

"Steve, your cabinets are a nightmare," you said, back turned to the door as you heard steps.

"Not Steve," he said, and you turned to face him. That smile, the one reserved just for him, on your lips.

"Eddie! Here to help me? Does anyone want something else?"

He just shook his head and walked closer to you. Took your hand on his, and your skin was just as soft as he thought about constantly.

"Is everything okay?" you asked.

He nodded, "Yeah, just came to a realization."

"Care to share with the class?" your words all teasing but your smile was nothing but sweet. He wanted to kiss you.

"I want to kiss you," he said out loud.

Your smile grew wider, "Well, do it, then."

And he did. And it was so much better than in his dreams. Yous lips were soft and tasted of whatever soda you were drinking, and your hands craddled his neck and you sure could feel his pulse going a million miles per second. But he didn't care, because you seemed eager for more, tongue poking at his lips and he let you in, and it was like fireworks exploding inside his head. He feelt fuzzy, and warm all over, and the happiest he's ever been. Because he's in love with you, he realized, and he was kissing you and you were kissing him back.

It felt like years before you separated, both panting a little.

"Oh, man, I like you so much," you mumbled, lips still almost pressed to his so he feelt every vibration in each of your words. It tingled him, head to toe, in and out.

"That's my realization," he responded, and you gave him another peck, and another one, and you were kissing him again when you heard steps behind you.

"C'mon, slow lovebirds, where's my damn popcorn? I wanna watch the sequel!" Robin showed up, picked up the popcorn bowl and her coke before leaving again.

You and Eddie laughed, and you gave him another peck, and another one, and you were kissing him again.

Neither of you got to watch much of the sequel.

#eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson ficlet #stranger things #stranger things fanfic #stranger things fic #stranger things ficlet #lui's strange celebration #lsc 📖#lui writes

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scar-lie · 2 months

Text

The remaining of you [Natasha]

Summary : Dealing the aftermath of the scene Natasha dreaded to come sooner in her life

Pairing : Natasha Romanoff x Fem ! Reader, Mom ! Natasha x Daughter! Romanoff

Warning : shouting, crying, mention of death, scared little Romanoff, torture, nightmare, I thinks that's

Word count : 2,514

No one has permission to repost my work anywhere, if you see it please let me know.

“What is your problem, Nat?! You can't just drop her off just like that, like she's nothing.” Wanda screamed at the red head, whose head was low, taking a deep breath and placing her hands on the table in the kitchen.

"Wanda, please, not now,” Nat whispered, swallowing the lump on her throat. But Wanda’s not having any of her shits anymore; she's tired of seeing how the little redhead heart broke every time Nat refused to do anything with her.

"No, Natasha, I’m not gonna let you throw her like garbage anymore; enough was enough; that girl is trying to at least have your attention, even for a second, but you always rejected her; you don't even spare her even a glance, and it broke her heart.” Saying Wanda was furious was an understatement. She took the girl under her wings a week when Natasha and Yelena brought her in, seeing how the baby was craving some affection and skin-to-skin contact.

"Wanda, please, it's not that easy.” Natasha was thankful that most of the Avengers are on mission and some run their own errands, leaving her, Wanda, and the 5-year-old girl in the compound.

“What Natasha? It is not easy for you to show a little affection to your daughter. You have 3 years, Natasha, 3 years to pull yourself together, 3 years that she's under my wings to protect, to love, admire, care for, and to be a mother to her. She's just a little girl, Natasha, and she's craving her mother's attention. Why can't you give her that? ”Natasha saw the hurt in her eyes, and she knows that it's not only Wanda's emotion she's showing but also the little girl too.

“I want to, Wanda, ok, I really do, but I can't, ok, I just can't,” Natasha shouted, looking up at Wanda with tears in her eyes.

“I want to cuddle her, kiss her, bond with her, spoil her, sing to her, or tell her story. I want to be Wanda. I really want to be a mother to her, but I just can't…….I-I” Natasha shook her head, wiping her tears that were now falling. She knew how her daughter was hurting; she heard every cry; she knew she always knew.

“Then do it; love her; show her that she matters to you because she will not love you or be there bothering you for your attention forever. Don't take her for granted, Natasha; you have a precious girl who loves you more than life itself; don't waste it.” Wanda stands tall in her spot, getting strong for the kid and not cave in and comforting her; she has to do it for the sake of the little girl who's sleeping upstairs.

“Don't let your insecurities get the best of you again; don't push her away like you did with Y/N; if you really love Y/N, you will take care of that little girl you two made; don't let history repeat itself.” Wanda quickly got cut off by Natasha's sudden outburst, with tears streaming down her face.

“You wanna know the reason why? Huh? That's the reason why I can't look at her; I can't be with her because every time I look at her face, all I can see and think about is Y/N, how she lay in that fucking bed unresponsive, how I didn't protect them, that I let her alone with an open window for my enemies to attack freely, and I blame myself for what happened, because if I could just be brave and don't let these thoughts get the best of me, I should have been there to protect them, or I should be the one laying in my own fucking blood, not her.” Natasha then punched the cabinet beside her, wanting to let the emotions out.

“I can't, Wanda, ok, because that day keeps flashing in my mind when I look at her eyes. She reminded me of how stupid, reckless, and selfish I am. Because of me, her mother got killed, and she got kidnapped right after she was born.” Wanda frowned, looking at Natasha with sympathy, so Natasha shook her head, not wanting her pity.

"Don't, Wanda, please don't look at me like that; I don't need your pity, Wanda.” They quickly got interrupted with the cute little voice in the entrance of the kitchen, making both of them look up in the direction.

“Auntie Wanda? ”The little girl whispered, clutching her big husky dog stuff toy that's a little big and taller than her, looking at her auntie with doe teary eyes, pout lips, and her cheeks and tip of her nose are red until she saw the redhead in the room, making her feel small and want to hide, so she scooted to the side, trying to hide in the small cabinet, only the head peeking out to look at her auntie Wanda.

"Oh, sweetheart, what happened? Why are you hiding there? ”Wanda softly talked, walking to the scared little girl, and sat on her heels to be on the same level as the little girl. She quickly wrapped her arm around her auntie, sniffling, and still had a strong grip on her stuff toy, so Wanda took her in her arm, one hand rubbing her back while she cried and one arm under her bump, and swayed her back and forth to comfort the little girl.

“I-I had a bad dream,” the little girl mumbled, soaking her aunt’s shirt.

“What dream is it? Can you tell Auntie Wanda what a bad dream it is? ”She nodded, looking at her auntie and wiping her tears, then resting her head on her auntie's shoulder while playing with the neckline of Wanda's shirt.

“I-I saw blood and bad guys,” Wanda giving her a reassuring smile to continue.

“And……and they took and I saw this fat old guy; he-he said I-I would stay with him from now on, and-and I saw dead body besides him,” the littleredhead cried again, seeing the woman lifeless, not knowing it's her mother she saw.

“Is it the same old guy and the same woman you saw?”Wanda asked softly, looking at Natasha, who has a defeated look on her face and a mixed emotion. She truly can't read Natasha at the moment.

“Yes, the beautiful woman with Y/H/L Y/H/C and arrow necklace, then the guy has glasses and white hair.” This makes Natasha clench her jaw and fist, knowing who the person her daughter is talking about, and she's afraid that the scene is that night her world will stop.

"Shhh, it's ok, sweetheart. You're here with me. You're safe now. He's not going to take you. It's ok.” Wanda gives Natasha a small smile, then goes up to their room floor to comfort the little girl and put her to sleep, leaving Natasha alone in the kitchen with her thoughts.

Natasha is jealous of Wanda. Yes, she's jealous of how Wanda can naturally take care of her daughter, how she loves Wanda, and how they both bond and do everything together. She's pretty jealous because she wanted a daughter; that's her one dream—a daughter with you.

So Natasha goes to the gym again to get all of her frustration out of her body and mind, to block everything that's bothering her, and maybe, just maybe, it will block the nightmare she has had since your death.

"No, no, please, don't hurt her. You got me, ok, hurt me instead. Just please don't hurt them,” Natasha begs the faceless woman in charge of guarding her. She's strapped down to the chair in the corner of your room where you're peacefully sleeping with your 8-month pregnant belly. You look peaceful and gorgeous.

But all the begging is useless because four women enter the room, and Dreykov is mockingly smiling at her. She hates it so much, but she didn't think of that; her mind and eyes are in your sleeping body.

When the four women approach you and the three women pin you down, it makes you awake in panic. They made sure you didn't move much, and the other one proceeded to slit open your stomach, making two big cuts, one horizontal and one vertical.

This makes you scream in pain, with tears running down your face because of the unbearable pain you are experiencing. You can feel her hands moving through your insides, slicing you open. You tried to break free to save you and your daughter from them, but you are no match for them; they are strong and can kill you in a second.

“NOOOOO!!!! PLEASE STOP IT! Please, please, I’ll do anything. Stop hurting her, stop hurting them.” Natasha screams, trying to break free from the restraints to try and save you both, but all she can do is watch you suffer from the hands of Dreykov, where she also watches how he takes her right after they cut the umbilical cord.

She watched how they just left you laying in your own bed, bleeding and unable to move or breathe. She watched how life drained out of your eyes, how the color of your skin turned pale, but how you looked at her in the eye while you were dying.

“Y/N? No please, no don't leave us please, no no noo please, no don't take my baby away no please.” Natasha keeps screaming, crying, and begging, but it's all no use; your dead in front of her, eyes still open, and your daughter is taken away. She's left there in the chair, feeling every pain.

“Wake up, wake up, Ms. Romanoff,” the little red head shouted, shaking Natasha violently. The other few attempts she made to gently wake her up didn't succeed, so she shook and slapped her to wake up.

“NOOOOOOO! ”Natasha screams, sitting up, beads of sweat rolling down on her face while she's panting, looking around the room until her eyes land on the little redhead who's now on the floor barefoot, head down, and nervous.

She got scared when Natasha suddenly jolted up, thinking that Natasha would hit her or shout at her, so she quickly climbed down, head low and nervous, so she kept taking small steps backward.

This didn't go unnoticed by Natasha, so she took a deep breath, closing her eyes, and Wanda's words kept echoing in her ear: “She will not love you or be there bothering you for your attention forever. Don't take her for granted, Natasha.”

And seeing her own daughter get scared and afraid to be near her is heartbreaking. She knows that sooner or later, her daughter will slip away, so she quickly gets out of bed, going to her daughter, but the little girl quickly backs away when she hears her footsteps.

So Natasha stopped, kneeled down, and carefully reached her arm out with a small smile. This made the redhead look up at the hand and up to her mother's face. Seeing a small smile made her butterfly fly in her stomach, but she was still skeptical; she didn't know Natasha, so she kept staring at her outstretched hand.

“Hey, it's ok, I’m not going to hurt you or scream,” Natasha softly said, making eye contact with her daughter. This brought her to tears, seeing your face on her daughter even though she had Natasha’s fierce red hair, green eyes, and button nose, so she quickly wiped it away for her sake.

“Wh-why are you crying?”Little Redhead asked, stepping forward and reaching out to wipe away the tears that keep running down her face, so Natasha chuckled to cover up the crack in her voice.

“Nothing; I-I’m just happy and sad at the same time,” she said, giving the little redhead a genuine smile. She was happy that she got how caring you are.

“Can I give you a hug? ”She asked innocently, making Natasha admire her, analyzing every detail on her face, and the silence made the little girl a little bit nervous, thinking that she didn't want hugs.

“Auntie Wanda said if I saw someone's sad, I should ask if I could give them a hug, ca-cause Auntie Wanda said it always works because my mommy used to do it before.” This makes Natasha even fall in love deeper with the little girl, so she quickly hugged her daughter tight, but not too tight to hurt her.

The little redhead smile, wrapping her arms around Natasha, resting her head on her shoulder, happy that she gets to hug her momma for the first time, so she’s relishing this moment, afraid that in the morning she will ignore her again.

“Are you feeling better? ”She asked innocently, so Natasha nodded, cradling her to her arm, and sat at the end of the bed.

“Yes, yes, I am.” Natasha sat the little girl on her lap and looked at her face.

“You look so much like your mother.” The little girl blushed, smiling and getting a little shy at the compliment.

“Th-thank you, you look pretty,” Natasha chuckled, tucking her little girl's hair behind her ear.

“You should go back to bed; your auntie Wanda’s not going to be happy when she finds out you stay awake at this time,” Natasha whispers, and the little girl looks down, fidgeting with her own hands, a bad habit she gets from you when you're nervous, scared, or overthinking, so Natasha stops her hands and holds them.

“What's the matter? Has something happened?”The little girl contemplates if she will tell her or not, but she has no other choice cause Wanda got called on an emergency solo mission, leaving her with the redhead, so either she should stay awake all night and wait for Wanda to tell her or she should tell Natasha and have a good sleep.

“I-I had a bad dream again,” she shyly said, still looking at her lap.

“The same one you said earlier? ”The little girl nodded, so Natasha took her chin and made her look at her.

“Hey, it's ok, I’m here…… How about you join me in my bed, and we will sleep next to each other? What do you think??”The little girl eagerly nodded; her eyes went wide, and she had a huge grin on her face. She feels like it's her lucky day, spending the night sleeping next to her mother.

“Will you tell me a story? ”She asked, getting in the middle of the bed, and Natasha got under the cover, leaving space for her daughter and inviting her in so the little girl could quickly snuggle at her.

“Of course," Natasha starts to tell her a story about how she and her mother met, making the little girl listen carefully and getting amazed by the story until she’s sound asleep in Natasha’s arm, making her smile, and seeing the little girl sound asleep makes her heart melt, so she wraps her arm around her and joins her in a slumber sleep.

#natasha romanoff #natasha romanova #natasha x reader #natasha x y/n #black widow #black widow 2021 #marvel black widow #natalia alianovna romanova #natasha x you #natalia romanova #mcu marvel avengers #marvel mcu #wanda mcu #mcu #mcu edit #marvel #natasha marvel #wanda marvel

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bedoballoons · 9 months

Note

Oh wow fantastic I loved it!! now I kinda want a part two to the whole short post what did happen after finding out there darling likes tall guys how will they comfort there rival

I'm assuming you meant confront! I hope so at least cause that's what I wrote! If not I can totally write a second one! Thank you so much for your request!

─⊰⁠⊹ฺ✿𝔾𝕖𝕟𝕤𝕙𝕚𝕟 ℍ𝕖𝕒𝕕𝕔𝕒𝕟𝕠𝕟𝕤⊰⁠⊹ฺ✿─

{༻~Yanderes confront their rivals~༺}

This is a Part 2! Part 1:

CW: Fighting, using their obsession to get information, a knife is mentioned, Freminet trains you to like him, descriptions of blood, slight gore, confronting, yandere themes, some angst, and Lyney call reader mon amour!

(Includes: Lyney, Tighnari, Venti, Freminet, and Aether!)

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

𑁍༄Lyney:

You knew Lyney was the reason Neuvillette had gone missing, it was obvious and yet no one could arrest him because there wasn't enough evidence, not to mention without the Chief of Justice...how could you have a trial? The whole of Fontaine was now in disarray, searching for Neuvillette everywhere and anywhere Lyney could have taken him, but not a single place had any results.

You didn't even know if he was still alive...but you just couldn't give up, thats what led you to this moment, honeyed words slipping past your lips and your arms around Lyney, batting your eyes at him..."Lyney, I'm all yours, Neuvillette is no longer a threat to that I promise. Let him go..." The magician sighed softly, so tempted, so enraptured by you that he almost gave it away from your beautiful eyes alone, "You know as well as I do mon amour, if I do as you ask...I'll be taken away to Meropide. Away from you..."

You bit your lip, wandering how deep into this act you'd have to go in order to convince him, "Not if they don't catch you, we can run away together... just you and me..." You kissed his cheek and he caved...unable to resist you any longer, "I can't say no to that..."

He reached out his hand, a card between his fingers...but it wasn't like any of his others, it was blue with a a outline of Neuvillette. "Neat isn't it?" Lyney asked when he'd caught you staring and with a snap of his fingers the card began to change, blue smoke circling around a spot on the ground until it sudden disappeared, leaving Neuvillette in its place...

"Neuvillette!"

He seemed perfectly healthy, shaken to say the least, but otherwise fine. It felt like you could breath again like everything would be okay...he could save you...right?

𑁍༄Tighnari:

You hadn't heard from Tighnari in over a week and you felt so guilty...after how hard it must have been to confess his feelings, you shot him down without even a moment to think if you really wanted to,... just because he wasn't exactly your type. Now he was probably in his home, regretting his decision to ever tell you how he felt in the first place...ever be nice to you at all for that matter.

You sighed, opening the door to your humble abode, only to see one of the most terrifying things even your nightmares could have prepared you for, "T-tighnari?" The fennec fox looked up at you with a crazed smile, a small hunting knife tightly gripped in his hand...the blade of it against against what looked to be a drugged Alhaitham, "You're finally home! We've been waiting for you...sorry to barge in uninvited but I had to show you that I was better than him. Let you see that I can overpower him, even though he's stronger and...taller."

You felt your chest tighten with fear, your hands shaking uncontrollably, "What... d-did you do to him Tighnari?" Meanwhile Tighnari was acting as if this was a casual hangout between the two of you, his tail swaying behind him and his ears twitching in delight, he even chuckled when Alhaitham attempted to mutter something, "Don't worry, he's just poisoned. I asked if he wanted something for a headache he was having and then I gave him something, it just wasn't what he had in mind..."

"Tighnari...let him go. T-this is crazy!" You felt tears welling up in your eyes, your body screaming at you to run for help and yet you felt frozen, unable to move a muscle. "I'm not crazy, I'm dedicated,...to you. I want nothing more than to be with you and if I have to make sure the scribe isn't able to interfere to have that, then I will." His eyes sparkled at the mention of being with you...

"...just let him go. Give him a antidote and I'll s-stay with you. Please Tighnari, don't hurt anyone more than you already have, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have shot down your confession so quickly, but I'll m-make it up to you" You reached your hand out and he wasted no time accepting it, wrapping his arms around you in a tight hug, all of it seeming so innocent..

"As long as you stay with me...no one else will ever get hurt."

𑁍༄Venti:

You'd never seen such a war before...archons battling against eachother, destroying the land with power far greater than you ever could have imagined, all of this...because you couldn't see yourself with someone short, what was Venti doing! By now there was a large crowd of people, some from Liyue, some from Mondstat and each of them cheering for their own Archon. There were even fights breaking out over who was better....

This had to stop. "Venti! Venti listen to me! I know you're angry and that's okay, but starting a war just because I said I wasn't into you isn't the way to feel better!" You shouted as loud as you could, but he wasn't able to hear you, the sound of large rocks crashing into the ground and highwinds ripping trees right out of the land impossible to talk over. Was it a lost cause...?

You shook your head, unable to give up at the thought of your friend getting hurt...even if he was stupid for starting it in the first place...you cared about him. You swallowed your fear and gathered up all of your courage, running into the danger zone, barely able to keep your footing while you continued to call to the anemo archon. "Venti! Vennntii!!"

Suddenly the part of land you'd been running on ripped away from the rest of the ground, flying upwards with you holding on for dear life, "Venti! Hellpp!!!" You felt your grasp slipping and then you were spinning, falling back down at such speed you'd die on impact, you shut your eyes tightly, praying for everything to be okay.

Then there was a gentle breeze surrounding you.. lifting you upwards, the entire battle out on pause when you came face to face with Venti, shocked to see him in his archon outfit, "Venti please, I'm sorry. Don't take this out on Zhongli, don't make such a big mess because of me. I'm... not worth it." You looked down at all the dilapidated area beneath you...all of this for you?

"You're worth more than every world or star in the entire universe...I'd fight to the end for you." The anemo archon touched your cheek softly.., making you feel something you never had before..

𑁍༄Freminet:

Freminet wouldn't leave your side, keeping you away from Neuvillette at any costs... pampering you with romaritime flowers and ocean shells, convincing you in ever way he could think of that he was better. He'd be there in the morning with warm breakfast and a nice hot beverage, he'd walk with you anywhere you needed to go so he could keep you safe and...people were noticing. Most thought you were dating. Even congratulating you two...but he always answered before you could, thanking them happily.

Truthfully...he was training you to only want to be around him and it was working...

𑁍༄Aether:

"ITTO!" You screamed, your skin paling at the sight of the Oni you had been crushing on so much, taken down to the ground with dark crimson blood dripping from his head onto grass beneath him, his face badly bruised and beaten up. You couldn't even tell if he was breathing, your heart racing as you looked to the culprit... his face speckled with deep red flecks of blood and sickening smile on his lips..

"W-why...Aether, you're supposed to be a hero why would you...he didn't...h-he didn't deserve this!" You rushed to Ittos side, holding his large hand in yours and staring at the damage someone you thought you could trust caused.

"I did it for you. Now he can't take you from me..., now there's only one hero for you and it's me." Aether grabbed your wrist harshly, pulling you close to him while you tried desperately to shove him away, "No! Let go of me! Help! Someone help!!" You screamed frantically, searching for any other signs of people...but nobody was around? How was that possible! It was the city?!

Aether smiled at you sadistically, "Being a famous hero and knowing important people means I can say there's a need to evacuate...and everyone will just leave. No one...can hear you now..."

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

ଘ(੭*ˊᵕˋ)੭* ੈ♡‧₊˚*⁠.⁠✧

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fooled-around-and-fell · 7 months

Text

Marks

Summary: Tangerine is reminded of the times you got hurt because of him, and the guilt is eating him alive.

Genre: angst, fluff

warnings: scars, very little smut, p in v (wrap it before ya tap it)

a/n: welcome to the list, Tangerine 🧡

Masterlist

-----

Tan is finally home after a week of being gone. He's finally here, and not just the lingering smell of when he last slept next to you. He's here, holding you close to him as your skin touches his.

There's no urgency, no rush. He's telling you that he's home, and he's staying for a long, long time. He peppers kisses on your neck, nipping and almost leaving a hickey, but stops cause he knows you have to work tomorrow.

Surprisingly, you pull him closer, urging him to keep going.

"Babe?"

"I'll wear a turtle neck."

Chuckling, he happily obliges and begins sucking on your flesh, his thrusts getting rougher at the same time. "So sweet."

"Tan," you moan out his name, legs locking behind him when he hits that spot. His thrusts get more erratic, and when he feels you coming around him, he spills inside you. He moans when you're still squeezing him.

"I've missed you." You chuckle.

"Sweetheart, you've no idea." He kisses you before pulling out and getting a towel to clean you up.

He sees you lying down on your stomach, slowly falling asleep, and he smiles, feeling like the luckiest man in the world. But then he sees the scars you have, ones that you got because of him.

The scar on your hip from when someone sliced you with a knife because you tried to get away from their grip, the one from an explosion, and that other one from when someone broke into your home to get revenge on Tan.

Suddenly he feels more disgusted with himself rather than lucky. No, he's still lucky, lucky because, despite everything that happened, you're still with him. Why is that? What did he do to deserve this?

If anything, you deserve so much more. At the least someone whose job isn't going to endanger you. The fact that you keep getting hurt because of him... Tan's mouth goes dry, and he doesn't know what to do.

"Tan? What's wrong?"

He hears your soft, sleepy voice. How can someone so kind, so perfect, be so nice to him? How can someone like you like- no, love him?

But he's not about to pour out his worries onto you. Not when he knows you're just going to assure him it's not his fault and that you still love him. He doesn't deserve that. You don't deserve that.

Without saying a word, he climbs into bed, spooning you. He's holding you extra tight, swearing to God that he's going to try his best to not let anyone hurt you ever again. Not even himself.

"I love you." He whispers.

Your eyelids feel heavy, and you mutter an "I love you too" before falling asleep.

-----

You wake up in the middle of the night feeling cold, and when you turn around to find Tan, you see him sitting on the bed instead, head in his hands.

"Tan?" You called out to him, caressing his back. "Everything okay?"

You know this happens -- it has happened before. Tan sometimes gets nightmares, and he'll just sit in silence for a while before returning to bed. He never wants to wake you.

"Y-yeah." He's taken aback. "Sorry, love, did I wake you?"

"No, not at all." You answer, searching for his eyes. "I was just cold."

"Did you have another nightmare?"

He doesn't answer but still accepts your invitation to go back to bed, burying his head in the crook of your neck and letting you cradle his figure.

He hugs your waist, and his grip tightens when he feels the scar on your hip. That's when you know what he's thinking about.

You kiss his forehead, "it's not your fault, Tan."

His jaw clenches and he buries his head deeper into your neck, if that's even possible. Tan doesn't answer, and you figure he must not want to talk about it.

Mindlessly, you start playing with his dark curls and suddenly you feel something wet against your skin. You realize Tan is crying.

"Hey." You pull away a little, wanting to look at him but he avoids your gaze, looking down like a kid in trouble. It's a little cute, you're not gonna lie. "Baby, look at me, please?"

Tan's scared. He doesn't know what to say, doesn't know what to do. If he tells you he's sorry, does that seem like he's just saying it? If he says he won't let anyone hurt you ever again -- isn't that what he said last time? He doesn't want to give you empty promises but also doesn't want to let you go.

"Let me in that head of yours." You lift his head by his chin. "We're a team, remember? We figure things out together."

He really is the luckiest man in the world.

"I..." He starts. "I'm sorry, I can't promise people won't try to hurt you. All I can promise you is my best. I'll do my best to make you happy, keep you safe, and make sure you won't regret choosing me. And I can't thank you enough for that -- for choosing me. I don't know what I did to ever deserve you, but I will cherish and love you until the day I die. No, even after that. I'll love you in the afterlife."

"Your best and your love is more than enough." You kiss him deeply. "I love you, Tan. And though I know you won't listen to me when I tell you this, I'll tell you anyway; you did everything to deserve me, just as I deserve you."

Tan finally smiles a little. "I'm not perfect."

"And I never asked you to be. I don't need you to be perfect, and I don't want you to be. I'm not perfect either, but you know what? You love me anyway."

"And you love me anyway."

"Exactly," you smile. "These scars, I don't remember them as scars that hurt, I remember them as marks that show how much you mean to me, and how you've saved me every single time."

Tan pulls you to his chest, hugging you so tight you almost can't breathe. "I love you."

"I love you too, Tan."

#tangerine #bullet train tangerine #tangerine bullet train #tangerine x you #tangerine x reader #tangerine x y/n #tangerine x oc #tangerine x female reader #tangerine x fem!reader #tangerine bullet train x reader #tangerine fluff #bullet train #bullet train 2022 #tangerine fic #tangerine fanfiction #tangerine imagine #aaron taylor johnson characters

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unforth · 7 months

Text

I had a day off yesterday.

And I can already practically hear the assumptions that such a statement is prompting the reader to make. Those assumptions are wrong. I don't mean I didn't work. I did, for about 8 hours. That's not at all what I mean.

I mean my wife took the kids out at 9:30, spent the night with her mom, isn't back yet the next morning.

There are things I NEED people on this website to understand about parenting. And I've talked about it before, and I'll talk about it again, because honestly the way that Tumblr as a cohort talks about parents makes me sick. Multiple polls have shown that only about 2% of people on here are parents. We're a huge minority, and we're constantly talked over, ignored, or accused of being bad parents (like, personally, I have had people reply to my comments or come on to my posts and tell me I shouldn't have my kids). In my case, being a parent means I'm almost 41, I'm married to @ramblingandpie, and our children are inching up on being 8 and 6 years old.

My entire day, and therefore my entire life, revolves around them. I'm up most mornings at 5 AM, because that's the earliest they're "allowed" to wake up, and so my brain just defaults to being awake around then - better to wake up before them, at least then I get a few minutes in the morning. Between 5 and 7, I sit with them, do my social media, work on side blogs, study Chinese. Then it's helping them get ready for school, then my wife or I or both get them on the bus, and then I work until the last possible minute, which is either when I need to go pick them up for an after school activity or when I need to go down and meet them off the bus. My afternoons are after school activities, chores such as washing the dishes and cleaning up toys, talking with them, working with them, playing with them. Their bedtime starts at 7:40, and my son gets scared if I leave before he falls asleep so I sit with him until about 8:15. As soon as he's asleep, I go fall on my face, sleep as best I can, then wake up and do it again. Overnight, it's hard to sleep deeply, because about once a week someone will wake up in the middle of the night and need help. That could be as minimal as a hug or as complex as having to completely change the bedding on a bunk bed at 2 AM while also comforting a child who is afraid they'll be in trouble, or afraid they're sick, or afraid of their nightmare, or, or, or. Further, if a child is awake, there is always noise. I usually study Chinese with two or more competing sources of noise. I read the same way. My life is loud, and active, and consists of constant interruptions.

I adore my family, and I love my children, but this is terrible for me.

I do all of this as an neurodivergent introvert. My clinical depression is at least medicated, mostly because post-partum depression after I gave birth the first time nearly drove me to suicidal in under a week (we were expecting this and were prepared, fortunately, getting help was as simple as a phone call). The constant noise and interruptions and forced socialibility are about the worst combination of home-life I could be subjected to. I spend far too many early mornings just breathing deeply and gearing myself up to be subjected to the wall of Loud, Boisterous, Needing-My-Attention that is every minute when anyone else in the house is awake.

So what did my day off look like?

I helped get the kids ready to go and did some morning chores. I'd been up at 4:30 AM so I also had already social media'd and studied. Then, while my wife finished the preparations, I started work, and I worked from about 8 am to about 4 pm, straight. I didn't get hungry so didn't bother stopping for lunch. No one interrupted me, no one asked me to look at anything they'd built, no one broke my concentration, no sounds could be heard except those I'd chosen myself.

I'd been out the day before at a local shopping street and listened closely to the things the kids said they wanted, so at 4 I grabbed a couple orders I needed to ship for work and drove to our local downtown, dropped the orders in a post box, then went back to the shops and did some Christmas shopping in the 45 minutes or so before everything closed. I think I'm basically done with what we'll get them - other bigger things will be left to grand parents - so that's a load off, I literally had a stress dream earlier this week about it being 12/24 and having forgotten to do the shopping and having to go to (oh horrors) the mall on the day before Christmas. (Reminder: I'm a Jewish atheist. It's just virtually impossible not to Holiday in the Culturally Christian Hellscape that is the US. Also, my wife is Christian. So.) Found something cute for my wife, too, even tho I already know the main thing I'm getting her. Then, I realized - one of my favorite restaurants is on that block. So. I went there. I sat by myself at a table, only the indistinct restaurant hubbub around me. I read four or five chapters of my book, and ate a savory crepe, and drank lovely fruit tea, and got a scone to-go that I'll eat for lunch today. It was more than I probably should have spent on myself - about $25, including tip - but fuck it. I only get maybe a handful of days off all year, and I'm allowed to indulge a little.

Then I came home. There were no lights on. There was no noise. I had considered doing some more merch work while watching TV on the actual television (my kids are too young for subtitled shows, so usually if I want to watch My Shows I either have to do it on my computer when they're not around, or put them on and read all the subtitles aloud while trying to keep up and process the actual meaning of what I'm reading). But when I got back, the quiet and dark was so goddamn NICE that instead I curled up on the couch and read more of my book. I did that until bedtime - still about 8:15, because I'm exhausted. Then...I went to bed. And I slept long and deep, knowing that there was no chance I'd be interrupted and woken up, I didn't have to be, even in sleep, alert to every noise and possibility that I'd be needed.

I'm still exhausted and burned out, but even one night to myself felt really, really nice.

Saying "Tumblr does X" as a universal statement is doomed to failure, but generally speaking, the parenting posts I see on Tumblr, the ones with tens or hundreds of thousands of notes, speak what's apparently widely seen as a truism on here: that unless someone wants to spend 24/7 with their kids, to be 100% emotionally available at all times, is always kind and patient and perfect, they are a bad parent, maybe even abusive. I remember when covid started, there were multiple posts actively mocking the "oh god, my kids are now home all the time, how am I supposed to do this?" attitude that a lot of parents posted in despair. WhY dId YoU hAvE kIdS iF yOu DoN't WaNt To SpEnD tImE wItH tHeM?

Look at what my usual day looks like.

Look at what my day off looked like.

Do you really think I don't want to spend time with my kids? Do you really think I don't love my kids?

But I'm not a fucking MACHINE. I'm a PERSON. That's what people on Tumblr seem to forget. PARENTS ARE PEOPLE. The same tumblrinas who post ~uwu be kind to yourself rest if you need to, you should forgive yourself for that mistake you made~ will turn around, with zero sense of irony, and post "you're a bad parent if you ever raise your voice around a child."

Expecting parents to be perfect means expecting parents to be inhuman. It also means that a parent can't be poor (can't spend all your time being the perfect parent if you have to work multiple jobs or weird hours!), can't be introverted (can't be a perfect parent if you're not completely emotional available, god forbid socializing is exhausting for you), can't be on the ADHD or autism spectrum (what do you mean you forgot to get your kid to a doctor's appointment once? what do you mean over-stimulation can make you angry? how dare you get angry at a kid!), can't be depressed (gotta get out of bed every single day, gotta always be upbeat, patient, happy, or else that's Evil), can't be (like my wife) physically disabled (what do you mean your hands hurt too much to hold a child's hand? are you denying them touch?? CRUEL). And when the only answer you can offer to that is, "if you can't be that perfect you shouldn't be a parent," then you're saying people who aren't middle class to wealthy, people who aren't neurotypical, people who aren't physically able, shouldn't have children.

And honestly...what the fuck is your problem?

I'm not perfect. I tell my kids to just leave me alone sometimes. I raise my voice, especially when one of my kids starts punching the other, but also sometimes just cause I'm exhausted and Can't Anymore. I've forgotten an appointment by accident and felt like a total fucking idiot, and I've skipped an after school activity because I just wasn't up for taking them. I've served them more unbalanced, unhealthy meals than I can count. I've made many, many mistakes, but I've also done my best, and I love my kids, and I hope that when they grow up, they'll still love me even as they recognize that I wasn't perfect, just as I've come to accept my own parents' short-comings while still loving them very much. They're people, too, and the older I get, the more I understand where they were coming from.

When I fuck up, I apologize.

When they tell me they're unhappy with something I've done, I apologize, and I try to do better. Sometimes I even succeed.

This shit is hard, yo. And it's getting harder every year.

I'm BEGGING Tumblr: you need to start seeing parents as people. The way y'all talk about parenting on here is toxic, and genuinely harmful, and frankly exhausting. You have no idea what the reality of raising kids is like, and you need to shut the entire fuck up.

I had a day off yesterday.

I might get one more before the end of 2023.

I already can't wait. I am so, so, so tired. sigh

(if you actually read this whole rant and even a single word of it resonated for you, please reblog it. I'm tired of never seeing positive posts about parenting while I see negative ones with a bajillion notes.)

#unforth rambles #parenting #momblr #nothing prompted this #i just think about writing posts like this all the time #because the low-level background buzz of how much tumblr hates parents is a constant stressor tbh #and every once and a while i tip over the line end up Writing the Thing #and so here we are again #god i have so much to do today and instead i procrastinate with this #oops

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bubbles-for-all-of-us · 8 months

Text

Pretty like the wind

Previous chapter / Next chapter

a/n Part four! I know I said no stories till the end of the week but my class got delayed and I dreamed of this so... here we are. This is a bit of a roller coaster.

warning: nightmares, injuries, past trauma, mean people.

Not proofread just yet

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Azriel was walking through the forest. Thick snow heavy on his boots. Yet the sound of it was soothing. Azriel always loved winter. There was just something so beautiful about it. Or maybe it was the cold that spoke to him. But then it only showed that something so lethal could also be beautiful. Delicate. And that in itself gave the spymaster hope that he too wasn't a lost cause. If someone managed to love winter as much as he did, they would learn to love him as well.

"Boo", the sound made Azriel flinch slightly. He was too lost in his own mind to notice that he was indeed no longer alone. Axel stood in front of him, a cheeky grin on his face. The spymaster pressed a hand to his chest dramatically and said, "Nearly gave me a heart attack". The boy fell into fits of laughter, too distracted to notice Azriel reaching for him before he playfully pulled the boy into his arms.

"Don't get the mittens wet, you two", your voice broke through the laughter. Gentle and soft. Guiding. Azriel looked up. Here in the middle of a forest clearing, you looked like an actual angel. He imagined that was what men in war called for. That's what an angel of mercy looked like. Had to... A snowball hit Azriel right in the chest. The little mischievous youngling was already racing through the piles of snow. His little feat of little help. The broken wings barely managed to lift his body, even a tiny bit.

Azriel chased after him. The silent forest was beating with screeches. "I want to join! I want to join!", Zofie's voice rang out too. She was nestled in your arms. All bundled up in knitted layers. Her tiny button nose was already rosy. She was too tinny for the snow. The storm must have been wild last night. It was more than clear that she would submerge in the white blanket, at least up to her armpits. Azriel quickly snatched Axel off his feet, pulling him up with one hand. There was no doubt that his tummy would be hurting from this extensive laughter.

"Want to sit on my shoulder?", Azriel suggested, his attention now fully occupied by the little girl. Her curious eyes gleamed. "You can tell me if the river over there is frozen over. I can't see myself", that was a white lie. Azriel knew it was. His shadows had scanned the place. But he wanted to make her feel special, so he wasn't all that surprised when she scrambled to get out of your hands and onto Azriel's broad shoulder. She felt like a little feather in his arms.

"It's frozen", Zofie muttered. "I want to look as well", Axel scrambled for Azriel's side, pulling up. "Kids, Azriel is not a climbing tree", yet your voice didn't seem to reach them. You stepped closer to them, your foot sliding down the rock that must have been under you. Azriel was quick to steady your step. "Careful, love", he muttered under his breath. You smiled lovingly at him right as you reached the very edge of the river.

Azriel stepped first. Testing the ice before he reached out a hand for the kids. The two of them were way too occupied as they held onto one another, giggling, their feet slippery beneath them. Azriel held both of your hands as you steadied yourself. Big smile on your face as you opened to say something, but all that came out of your mouth was blood, your body lunging forward as an aero pierced your heart. Azriel caught your body right as the white material of your dress pooled with your blood, turning crimson. "No", was all he managed to mutter. "Y/N, hey... hey, love", his vision grew blurry. Your big eyes staring at him.

Thudding filled his ears. Then came the sound of crackling. Chipping ice hitting the snow. Azriel's head leaped sideways. He caught a glimpse of the two kids' fists hitting the ice. "No", he shouted. Your body slipped out of his arms as he scrambled to get up. Only to lock eyes with them as the ice gave in beneath them, and both of their bodies sank into the icy river. Azriel let out a deadly roar as he hurdled toward the crack, dipping himself into the water.

"No", the spymaster shot up with a jolt, his body covered in sweat, hair sticking to his face. For the first time, he hated the darkness that surrounded him. With one swift movement, Azriel jumped out of bed. His heart was beating so fast that he was sure he was going to puke all over himself. "They're fine", he muttered to himself, "It's fine". Yet his feet were already moving. His body carried on its own as he vaulted through the stairs. Fist pounding on the door while Azriel leaned against the doorframe.

He nearly fell to his knees when your smaller body appeared. Messy hair - clear evidence that you have been in a deep sleep. "Azriel", you mumbled as you scanned the male in front of you. His heavy breathing was so loud that you barely heard yourself. "Are you okay?", the spymaster whispered, his eyes looking all over you. So mortified. Shaking. "Well, besides the fact that you just woke me...", you tried to lighten the mood, but it seemed like his mind was moving a step forward. Azriel peered over your shoulder and asked, "Axel and Zofie?". You stepped aside to give him a clearer view of what was behind you. The room was dim, but the fireplace cast enough light to see the two kids nestled in between the sheets. "They're...", you started, but cut yourself off quickly. "Is everything okay?", you reframed your words.

That seemed to snap something within Azriel. He ran a hand through his damp hair and said with a deep breath, "Yeah, sorry, sorry, I...", he shook his head, almost in disbelief, that he had even come all the way here. As if his mind had only grasped onto reality just now. "Hey...", you moved to reach for his palm. Your hand was much smaller than his, but they fit snuggly against one another. Azriel just looked at you. Soaking in your soft gaze, the feeling of your skin. Your hand was indeed warm. And soft. Those two things alone seemed to settle him. You let him take a couple of calmer inhales before stepping out of the room. "Come", you beckoned him.

He just watched you move around the kitchen. The silky nightgown flowed with every move. Light goosebumps on your skin. The lower levels seemed to get colder at night. Azriel was still burning up from his nightmare, so he didn't seem to feel the chill, but you did, and a part of Azriel felt guilty that he had nothing to offer. He was... shirtless. That made his cheeks heat even more. His muscles flexed, but he tried to calm himself down. Azriel didn't want to gawk. He wasn't that kind of man, but the silk, your body beneath it... And all you were doing was making a cup of tea for him. He shifted in his seat. Eyes burning holes in your back. You felt his gaze too, grateful that your back was turned to him. You caught the strap of your nightgown slipping off your shoulder as you reached for the honey, cursing silently before turning back to the spymaster. Eyes meeting his in an instant.

"Drink", you handed him the cup, his fingerprints brushing over yours. "Poison?", he asked, your lips curving upwards, "The strongest kind". Azriel held your gaze firmly before he slowly nodded his head, "Hum, you licked the spoon, though". You crooked your head with a sigh, "Well, shit, huh. Guess we both are doomed now". Azriel let out a chuckle that matched yours before his eyes settled back on you. You were right beside him. Even with him sitting down, you still had to tilt your head up slightly.

"What?", you asked after a light smirk curled his lips. "Why are you looking at me like that?", you asked, crossing your arms over your chest. "You cursed", his words took you by surprise before you snorted slightly, your hand coming up to cover your mouth. "I'm not an angel", you cackled quietly. But Azriel didn't find it funny. You look like one, he thought. But he couldn't bring himself to say that.

"Sorry, yeah, an assassin,", he said in a serious voice, narrowing his eyes. You bit your lip, trying not to laugh as well. "You can be funny, you know", you told him, Azriel's eyes grew big. "Is that a compliment?", he said in a teasing manner. "Hmmm", you tapped your finger on your chin a couple of times, "No, an observation". Azriel took a sip of the tea before looking back at you. "Keeping tabs on me?", and you could swear his voice sounded deeper, even more velvety than before. Something shivered deep within you. "Most definitely", you said firmly.

Your eyes locked once again. Only now did you realize how close you'd been standing. You could feel the heat of his body radiating. You bit your lip without thinking, and Azriel let out a low growl. Darkness flowed through his eyes. His magic rippled beneath his skin. Your hand reached for him. Your fingers glowed slightly as you brushed them over his chest. It felt like there was no oxygen in the room for a moment. But you equally felt as if you were floating. Azriel leaned closer. You could feel his breath against your skin. Yet another shiver ran down you. You were inches away. There was so little space between you. You sucked in a breath. Something creaked in the distance, making you both jump apart. You quickly tucked your hair behind your ears. Azriel let out a cough. "It's getting late", "The kids upstairs", you both said at the same time, nodding. Eyes everywhere, but on each other.

You brushed a hand over your face before plastering a big smile for Zofie, who was nervously twisting the side of her skirt between her fingers. You knew that the moment the music filled the room, she would loosen up and grow into her body, but now she was fighting her fear of being around others. Past terrors eating at her. "Hey", the feeling of a warm palm on your shoulder made you turn to the side. Your cheeks instantly grew crimson as you saw Azriel standing there. His hair was messy, and from the bags under his eyes, you were almost sure that he too got little sleep last night. You couldn't help but wonder if the same thing kept him up for the rest of the night. You didn't say anything; you just scooted to the side to give him more space. His eyes instantly moved to look for Zofie; that alone made your heart swell. Azriel waved her way, and she instantly dropped her head, her long hair covering her face, but you could see a little smile on her face from where you sat. "She's been asking about you", you said softly, pulling Azriel's attention back to you. "Has she?", the tinge of hope in his voice was evident. You hummed, "That cookie was surely made with love." Azriel stayed quiet, but you knew that your words hit the spot.

You two watched Zofie in silence, besides a laugh here and there when she lost herself in the sound of music just a bit too much. Her wild hair, accompanied by a bright pink too-too, made her quite a character. Azriel went back and forth between watching Zofie and you. His hand inched closer to yours. Your gaze caught the subtle action. "About last night...", Azriel said quietly. You were about to turn to him when the voice from another direction caught your full attention instead. "Y/N," it was Padme. The look on her face made all the blood drain from her body. You stood up quickly, "What is it?". She rarely got down to the communal levels; work kept her in the upper tower. So the fact that she was here had to mean that something bad must have happened. And all she said was one word, but that was enough to make you sway. "Axel", she muttered. You felt a hand steady you from the back. The world blurred for a moment, and then you took off running.

The healer level was laced with a thick smell of herbs and brews. That didn't help the dizziness that pulled at you. You must have looked like a mad woman, the way you barged in. Your eyes were wild as you scanned the healing pods. "What happened", you breathed out. Trying. Hoping that someone would give you the answer. Any answer. But no one said anything. Did you even speak the words aloud? You took a deep breath. "What happened?", you asked firmly.

One of the healers waves you over from across the room; the door to the last pod was open, and you assumed that was where Axel was. "He tried to fly over the wall", the female said once you were close enough to her. "Axel", you nearly shrieked at the image of that. He couldn't. There was no way. His wings were too weak. "He made it to the second floor", she continued, but you raised your palm, silencing the healer. You could imagine the rest yourself.

You pushed past her, slipping into the room. Axel was covered in bruises. The deformed wings were all scratched up, lying on his side loosely. Bile rose in your throat. You swayed slightly, only to be met with a strong wall of muscle behind you. "We cleaned up the bruises in the front but not the wings,", the healer said quietly. You knew their help was minimal when it came to that. In this case, at least. "I've got this, thank you", you said as professionally as you could, your nails digging into the warm muscular arms that were the reason why you still stood on your own two feet. "I'll call you over if I need help", the healer nodded her head, stepping away.

You inched closer to the bed. "I'll turn you on your stomach, okay?", you asked Axel softly. He barely showed any emotion, silent tears streaming down his face. You knew he endured worse pain. The night you dragged him out of that cellar... Your hands trembled at the cries that echoed.

"Let me", Azriel stepped up, reaching for Axel. You knew he was here. That he was with you. You felt Azriel right beside you up here, but it felt as if your brain had only caught up to the fact that it was his warmth that comforted you all this time. Now that he was away from you, the cold that nipped at your skin seemed almost unbearable.

Axel's face changed once he saw Azriel. A hiccup slipped past his lips, and you had to turn your head to the side to hide the tears that fell down your cheeks. "Hey, I've got you", Azriel muttered, both of his hands gripping Axel's as he kneeled at the top of a bed the boy was resting on. "I'm sorry, I'm...", Axel crocked out, trying to move his bruised body. "Why did you do it, bud?", Azriel might not understand and know most of the things yet but to make a flight like that... No youngling could do that; their bodies simply lacked strength. Another choked-out sob slipped past Axel's lips before he spoke up again, "They were making fun. Said I was... I was deformed", those words ripped out a chunk of Azriel's soul. In flashes, Azriel saw himself within the boy. He was eager to show that his will wasn't broken and that he had the spark within to be just like the others.

Azriel opened his mouth, but you quickly cut him off. "Let's look over your wings, okay? We'll figure out the rest later", you muttered, brushing away Axel's damp hair. You met Azriel's eyes briefly before all of his attention was back on the boy, who held onto him for dear life. You plunged deep within yourself. Searching for that familiar thread of light. You let our palms drown in the white light, coating the beaten wings and forming a cast over the mangled boning. Axel winced. "You're doing better than most soldiers in a war camp, bud", Azriel was quick to reassure him. His cold shadows brushed over Axel's forehead and neck, trying to keep the fever at bay and hold the boy conscious for as long as possible. "It hurts", he wept through gritted teeth. "Y/N will make it better", Azriel muttered, his eyes drifting to your hands, which by now had both of the scattered wing tissue glowings. Your body was shivering; it was no doubt taking a toll on your body too. Azriel was quick to calculate the leap he would have to make if you were to pass out. Keeping some of his shadows alert so they would notice the change in your breathing. "Hang in there, okay? This will be over soon," those were the last words Azriel told Axel before the boy limped completely. The tiny hands that held onto his palm so firmly fell loose. But Azriel didn't let go. He was not going to leave him. Wasn't going to let him feel alone and helpless ever again. He felt like he owed it to Axel and to the young version of himself too.

The candles were burning low. Azriel had lost count of how many times he had replaced them by now. He had bumped into Padme. The female didn't fully introduce herself, but Azriel had a feeling that she was an important figure here. She had wanted to talk to you, but you were barely a shell of a living creature by then, and something within Azriel protested against letting anyone else talk to you. Not now. So Padme talked to him. Gave him an image of what had happened.

The flying lesson the Illyrian children had. The fact that Axel watched it from the sidelines. Unfit to fly until the healing process had finished. "Kids can be vicious", she said with a voice so ancient that Azriel's bones shrieked, "But our Axel is different". Those words left a bitter taste in Azriel's mouth. "He's special, not flawed", the spymaster said roughly, and the woman sent him a pleased look. As if he had passed a test he didn't even know he was having. The rest of that conversation was hazy. Azriel was running on too much adrenaline himself.

He carefully opened the door to the healing pod. He did not want to wake any of you up, especially if you had finally fallen asleep. But you were just in the spot where Azriel had left you last. Axel's head was on your lap, your fingers slowly brushing through the boy's hair. Your eyes were empty as you looked down at him. "I brought some food", Azriel whispered, making you snap your head up. You were drained. He might not know much about the magic you possessed, but whatever you had done had taken its toll on you. "He just dozed off", you muttered quietly, turning your attention back on Axel. "It's for you", Azriel said, setting the tray on the little table. "I'm not hungry", you said bluntly. "Y/N", Azriel breathed out. He had seen denial and anger eating up at his soldiers. Had seen it eating up at Rhys when he had to let go of Feyre.

"I'll watch over him", you said stubbornly. "You need to rest", Azriel tried to reason, but all he was met with was a shake of your head. "I'm resting", you said, pointing at the bed you were sitting on. "Y/N", the spymaster said softly, way softer than he usually liked to use his voice. "He's in pain. I need to help," you said, Azriel looked down at the palms that you kept tucked away beneath the boy's wings. This whole time? You've been summoning magic this whole time. Worry laced Azriel's whole body.

"Y/N," he said, way more firmly this time. The way he spoke, your name had finally broken something deep within you. "If I fall asleep...", your voice died down. Bottom lip quivering. "Y/N, come here, love", Azriel pulled at your wrist, mindful of the boy resting against you, until you were up on your feet. He brought you closer. Your final undoing was the moment his arms wrapped around you.

"I'm failing them. I keep failing them", a sob slipped past your lips, your hands taking fistfuls of his shirt. "No, you are not", Azriel said firmly, "I've been here long enough to see how much you love them. And they need just that, sweetheart. They need love". You let your tears flow freely at that. All the emotions were pouring out of you. Azriel didn't budge, holding onto you just as firmly. "I'm so scared", you hiccuped finally, with no strength to keep your walls up any longer.

"I know", Azriel muttered. "I'm so scared", you pressed your face into his chest, and Azriel moved to brush his fingers through your hair, "I know, but you don't have to be. I'm here now. I'll keep watch over you all". And there was no doubt in his words. There was no doubt in your soul. You knew he wasn't lying. You could feel it. "Foreign soldier", you muttered after a while, Azriel chuckled slightly. Brushing a strand of hair away from your face, "I need to find a sword like Axel drew", he stated, making the corners of your lips turn upwards slightly. You closed your eyes, letting the world flow through you. Allowing yourself to stop for a minute while Azriel held you. Until your eyes snapped open and you pushed back slightly, "Zofie...", you muttered.

#azriel x reader #azriel x you #azriel imagine #azriel acotar x reader #azriel acotar imagine #azriel shadowsinger #azriel spymaster #acotar imagine #acotar x reader #acotar x you

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theminecraftbee · 6 months

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Tango's half-asleep in a cabin he's sharing with Impulse and Skizz and Joker and Zed. It's been loud the past few days as they set up. Most of them plan on being busy during the break, so they won't all be sharing it that often, but they'd needed a place to crash when they weren't busy doing other things. Impulse had offered to let them stay in the Vault Hunters server, but it's practically tradition, shacking up together in a cabin in the woods and pretending no one can get to them. It's rare that they use the cabin for more than a few weeks--rare any of them need it for that long--but it's nice. Traditional. Useful to drag each other to when they get too workaholic.

Honestly, Tango's just been napping. He'd gotten Decked Out to a place it could be run alone, and then he'd gotten decoupled from Decked Out in a process he doesn't really want to talk about that sort of melted his brain out his ears again. He'd gotten yelled at for getting possessed again, and hugged, and then told to describe in exhaustive detail what being possessed was like because as much as Tango loves his friends, neither Zedaph nor Impulse are like, normal about things like that, and--

Tango's legs had barely worked during the end-of-season party. Turns out being part of a machine for like, three months, has an effect on the body when you're removed from it! Haha. Who would have guessed? He'd shared some drinks with the hermits, conspicuously avoiding alcohol on account of the room spinning enough without it, and then told Impulse he had to leave for his own good, please, Pearl could drink him and Gem under the table stop trying to prove otherwise, and they'd departed.

And Tango had taken a nap. And another nap. And... wait for it... another nap.

It's supposed to be a longer break this season. Tango is contemplating napping for at least a month. He deserves it. For him.

Anyway, he's half-asleep in the cabin, halfway still snoozing and quarter of the way catching up on the technical journals he hadn't been reading while he was Decked Out, and quarter of the way remembering how like, fingers work when they're not being puppeted by a massive death machine of his own design, when he catches a look at the time and date, pauses, and realizes something.

"I forgot," he mumbles. "Huh."

He waits a moment for the howling of the absence Decked Out's wind to be replaced with eerie, indescribable silence, like the world had been replaced for months at the start of the season whenever he saw a reminder. The thing is, though, he's just--he's too tired to grieve more. Tired, and satisfied with his work, and he's safely in a cabin in the woods where Skizzleman is sleeping in the bunk above him, snoring with a loudness only Skizz possesses. His brain is still halfway leaking out of his ears and he still sort of craves raw meat. His tongue is real, by the way. He keeps noticing it? His tongue is real? Man, he'd say he doesn't recommend getting possessed, but he's totally going to do it again, and--

"I forgot," he says again, testing out the word against his lips. "The day I died passed and I forgot about it."

Huh.

He waits a few more minutes for the panic to claw at his chest. It strikes him then, though, that it hasn't for some time, and some of that may have been his brain being used as a processing chip for Decked Out in equal measure with like, being his brain, so he didn't have room for that, but. Even before then. Even in the moments he was the most himself.

Huh.

"Toppers?" Skizz asks from the top bunk. "What are you doing awake, huh? It's, uh--dark, I don't know what time it is, I broke my clock."

"My sleep schedule broke during the Decked Out thing," Tango says, "I told you that."

"Yeah, but like--did you have a nightmare about evil cows or something?"

"Evil--what do you think Decked Out is?"

"I was there! I know what it is!" Skizz says. He pauses a moment. "If you need something..."

Tango lies back and thinks of his friends. They were smiling as they left, this season.

"No, I'm fine. Don't worry about it. It's just that it's 1 AM on the 23rd, is all."

"Oh, man, that late?"

Tango laughs. "Yeah. That late."

He means something different than Skizz.

"Do you think ghosts eat people more if they're sleep-deprived?"

"You are actively going to make it worse for yourself. Also, wait, did you say you broke your clock? How?"

"No, listen--"

He's late.

That's alright.

He'll always have time later.

#hermitcraft #tangotek #(also featuring skizz but not major enough to tag)#a bee fic #i realized i was late for a big moon anniversary fic and then all at once...

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genshinluvr · 1 year

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Failed Attempts

Pairings: Various Genshin Men x Isekai'd!Reader

Summary: An AU in which you and the men aren't dating (yet). This is about the men and their failed attempts at flirting with you and getting some alone time with you away from the others.

Note: Hello, I typed this out while I was sick, so I have no idea how this turns out. I did have a first draft at first, but then I didn't like how it was turning out, so I deleted the first draft and started a new one. Which is this one! ;v; I hope you all like it or at least find it decent. I type the entire thing while having a fever and during my midterms week 💀 Since Valentine's Day is coming up in two days, I guess this can count as one. Especially towards the end of the fic, maybe 🤔 To the new and returning readers, please remember that I don't post anywhere else but on Tumblr (Genshinluvr) and on AO3 (Aaliah_exo).

Warnings: None that I know of unless Childe wanting fourteen children counts.

Word Count: 10.1k

There are many times when the twenty-five men have attempted to flirt with you and ask you out on a date, but their attempts would fly over your head. Imagine trying to ask your crush out or flirt with them, only for them to stare back at you cluelessly or brush it off as any other comment. The reaction is like a kick to the gut, but in this case, a kick to the ego and pride. It’s a hilarious sight for Lumine, Paimon, and anyone who witnesses it in person. The failed attempts are entertaining for any person that sees them in person. Not only is it funny, but it’s also hard to watch.

Here you are, pinned against the wall. Childe’s arms cage you between the wall of the estate and his body. He gazes at you with intensity while you stare back at him owlishly. The look on your face is so cute that it makes Childe want to lean down and bite your cheeks. The upstairs cheeks, but the downstairs ones are good too— for the bedroom.

“So, [Y/N], what do you think about us having a future together? You, me, us living in Snezhnaya and having fourteen children?” Childe asks casually.

You look at Childe with wide eyes. “Fourteen children? I don’t think I’ll be able to handle that many children, Childe. I can barely handle twenty-five men living under the same roof as me,” you say lightheartedly.

Childe opens his mouth to reply, but the timer next to the oven chimes, startling both of you. You peek from under his arms, and your eyes light up. Before Childe had you pinned to the estate’s wall, you were baking cookies because you were craving chocolate chip cookies. And now they are done baking in the oven!

“The cookies are ready!” You said.

You duck from underneath Childe’s arms and trot over to the kitchen, grabbing oven mitts, opening the oven, and pulling out the tray of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies. The smell of freshly baked cookies wafts in the air, almost making you moan at the delicious aroma. Childe is left standing there, his mouth agape, looking at you in disbelief.

Pantalone snickers and props his arm on Childe’s shoulder with a smirk. “Maybe [Y/N] doesn’t like the idea of being trapped in Snezhnaya with mini Tartaglias running around,” Pantalone teases Childe.

“I don’t blame them for avoiding Childe’s strange proposition! Sounds like a nightmare for us all! One Childe is enough already,” Scaramouche rolls his eyes, smirking at the annoyed ginger Harbinger.

Itto snorts and smirks at Childe. “Maybe they’re not interested in you, Childe. I think they might be into onis like myself,” Itto says, flipping his hair over his shoulders.

Childe makes a face at Itto, brushing Pantalone’s arm off his shoulders with an eye roll. While in the kitchen, you place the chocolate chip cookies on the cooling rack and take your oven mitts off after closing the oven. You set the timer to five minutes for the cookies to cool down, placing the timer next to the cooling rack.

You walk out of the kitchen and dust your hands on your apron. “The cookies should be ready to eat after five minutes! Although I can’t guarantee that it won’t be hot. I think it’s better to eat them fresh than eat them days after it's fresh out of the oven,” you said.

Kaeya approaches where you’re standing and stands before you. Kaeya caresses your face in his left hand, brushing the tip of his thumb against the apples of your cheek. Kaeya smiles at you and gazes at you with the softest expression you have ever seen. You look at Kaeya, breathless. Kaeya brushes a strand of hair away from your face, tucking them behind your ear. Childe, Itto, Pantalone, and Scaramouche stare at Kaeya blankly. How dare Kaeya make such a suave move on you right in front of their very own eyes? Especially after Childe’s failed attempts of getting you to elope with him, move to Snezhnaya with him, and raise fourteen children together. Not that they think about it— Childe, Itto, Scaramouche, and Pantalone can see why the red-headed whine tycoon dislikes his adoptive brother so much.

“Once the cookies are done cooling down, care to eat the cookies with me in front of the fireplace? Just you and me?” Kaeya asks.

To you, Kaeya’s voice is soft and gentle. But to the other men around him, Kaeya’s voice sounds like nails on a chalkboard. Of course, the Calvary Captain is suave with the ladies! It’s no surprise that someone like Kaeya would be able to scare a total babe like you. Right? You stare up at Kaeya, and a big smile appears on your face.

“That sounds perfect, Kaeya! We can all sit in front of the fireplace and eat freshly baked cookies! It’s a perfect atmosphere!” You said.

Everyone almost burst out laughing. Kaeya didn’t have a strong reaction to your obliviousness. Instead, Kaeya continues to smile at you and nod. Kaeya doesn’t mind that other people will be joining the both of you in front of the fireplace, eating freshly baked chocolate chip cookies that you have baked. As long as you’re sitting next to him, he doesn’t mind having other people join you two.

Kaeya’s bottom lip juts out. “You’ll be sitting next to me, right?” Kaeya asks. He reaches for your hand and interlocks his fingers with yours.

The little display of affection causes the men in the room to go silent. Eyes narrowing, their eyes zeroed in on your and Kaeya’s laced fingers. You squeeze Kaeya’s hands and nod.

“Of course, we can sit next to each other, Kaeya! You don’t need to ask,” you reply. “Besides, I think everyone sitting around the fireplace while eating cookies would be a perfect time for us all to get to know each other more,” you said.

Itto holds his hand in the air. “What if we don’t care about the others, but we only care about you?” Itto asks.

You snort. “Itto, I think you all should care about each other regardless. Plus, since we’re all living under the same roof in the abode, it would be nice if we all got to know each other and formed a friendship,” you reply.

“What about a relationship?” Aether asks.

You stare at him and at the other men, who are all anticipating your response to Aether’s question.

“I mean, if you all want to get into a relationship with each other, go ahead!” You shrug your shoulders.

Everyone in the room either face-palmed or stared at you in disbelief. How are you this dense? Well, technically, Aether wasn’t as specific as he should be, but your response is something they did not expect.

“No, no, no, sweetheart. I think Aether meant forming a relationship with you,” Capitano says, rubbing your shoulders.

You shrug your shoulders again. “A relationship can mean anything. There are many terms for relationships,” you murmur, stroking your chin.

Kaveh slams his forehead on the table. “Dear archons! This is getting us nowhere,” Kaveh groans.

You wince at the sound of Kaveh’s forehead meeting the wooden table in front of him. The tension in the room is interrupted by the sound of the timer chiming from the kitchen. You walk to the kitchen to check on the chocolate chip cookies, leaving the men to their thoughts.

“I can’t believe that [Y/N] assumed that we wanted to date each other,” Gorou shivers, shaking his head.

Ayato sighs and rubs his temples. “I can’t tell whether they’re pretending to be oblivious about us trying to make a move on them or if they’re being serious about it,” Ayato murmurs, looking over in your direction.

“Judging by the expression on their face, I’m afraid they’re not joking around,” Diluc replies.

A few minutes later, you emerge from the kitchen with a plate of chocolate chip cookies in your hands with a big smile. You gesture for the men to follow you to the living room and set the plate of cookies down in front of the fireplace. The cookies are warm, and you broke one cookie in half in the kitchen to see how well the chocolate has melted, and it was perfect.

“The cookies turned out perfect! It’s a perfect amount of gooeyness to the melted chocolate, and it’s warm and soft,” you said.

Thoma walks up to you and drapes his arms over your shoulders. “The cookies look perfect, [Y/N]! I can never get my cookies to turn out as perfect as yours. Care to show me how to bake a cookie as perfect as yours?” Thoma asks, smiling down at you.

You smile and nod. “Of course! I’ll write down the instructions for you and give them to you tonight!” You said, grabbing a piece of cookie and biting into it.

The chocolate melts on your tongue, and the flavor bursts in your mouth, making you moan. You close your eyes with contentment and lick the chocolate from the corner of your lips. The cookie tastes heavenly, and you certainly died and went to heaven after taking a bite of the cookies. When you open your eyes, you notice that no one is eating the cookies. Instead, their eyes are focused on you, more specifically, your lips.

“What? Is there something on my lips?” You ask, feeling around your lips to make sure there aren’t any crumbs sticking to your lips.

Albedo nods his head and steps forward. He cups your face in his hands, tilts your head up, and wipes the small piece of crumb near your chin. Albedo wipes a tiny bit of chocolate stain at the corner of your lip before lifting the same finger and licking the chocolate from the tip of his finger.

Albedo smiles at you. “There’s no need to worry about stains and crumbs on your face anymore, [Y/N],” he says softly.

Albedo walks back to where he was standing earlier and crossed his arms over his chest with a faint smug smirk. The men around him look at Albedo in disbelief. How can someone like Albedo make such a bold move on you? Especially when it’s in front of other people who want [Y/N] almost as much as Albedo does.

Kazuha lets out a low whistle. “How suave of you, Chief Alchemist,” Kazuha says, smiling at Albedo while gazing at the Chief Alchemist from the corner of his eyes.

“So… are we not going to eat the cookies?” You ask, tilting your head to the side. “Of course, none of you have to eat the cookies if you don’t want to! I’m not going to force any of you to eat the cookies,” you chuckle, walking over to the couch and plopping down on it.

Baizhu leans to Al Haitham and whispers, “Did Albedo’s action not affect [Y/N]?”

“I’m not entirely sure. [Y/N] is hard to read,” Al Haitham mutters.

Heizou grabs a chocolate chip cookie and sits on the couch beside you, looking over at Kaeya with a smirk on his face. Kaeya stares at Heizou with his eyebrows raised, a humorless smirk appearing on Kaeya’s face. Heizou taps your shoulder and motions for you to rest your head on his shoulders.

“If you need a shoulder to lean on, you can always lean on my shoulders. Only someone as special as you can lean on my shoulders,” says Heizou, shooting you a charming smile.

Without a second thought, you happily lean your head on Heizou’s shoulders while taking a bite of your cookie. You look at Kaeya and reach your hand out, making grabby motions with your hands. Kaeya feels his face heat up before walking over to you. Kaeya sits beside you, pulls you onto his lap, and reaches for a chocolate chip cookie to snack on while the men are glaring daggers at him.

“You’re really comfortable,” you murmur, snuggling into his arms after finishing your chocolate chip cookie.

Tighnari purses his lips. “I will not eat a chocolate chip cookie unless [Y/N] gets off of Kaeya’s lap,” Tighnari comments, sticking his nose up in the air with a huff.

Cyno raises his eyebrows at Tighnari. “Well, that’s an unusual thing for you to say, Tighnari. I can see Childe be the one to make a comment like that, but you?” Cyno asks.

Pierro rolls his eyes. “Not only is it unusual, but it’s also childish coming from someone of his caliber,” Pierro looks at Tighnari from head to toe with an eyebrow raised.

A few minutes later, you end up getting off of Kaeya’s lap and walking back to the kitchen to grab a glass cup of milk. The cookie would taste even better with milk, so why not get some milk to drink with your chocolate chip cookie? When you walk back to the living room, everyone is already standing, and the cookies are missing from the plate. You look at the men and notice that their cheeks are stuffed.

You point at the plate and back at the men in front of you. “Did you all eat the cookies while I was gone?” You ask.

Venti quickly chews the chocolate chip cookie in his mouth and nods. “Yes! The cookies are delicious! We couldn’t help ourselves and decided to eat them,” Venti clears his throat after almost choking on a piece of crumb.

A big smile appears on your face after hearing what Venti said. “That’s great! What do you guys think of the cookies? Anything I need to change or improve on?” You ask.

Xiao shakes his head. “There’s nothing you need to change. The cookie is perfect, just the way it is. The same goes for you,” says Xiao.

Xiao hears a faint chuckle coming from behind him. Xiao’s head snaps towards the person’s direction, and he sees Dottore chuckling behind his hand while standing beside Pantalone, who is also chuckling.

“The Yaksha flirting with [Y/N]? How precious,” Dottore coos, giving Xiao a teasing grin.

Zhongli gives Dottore a disapproving look and shakes his head. “Dottore, I wouldn’t be speaking if I were you. Xiao has a subtle way of complimenting someone without being overbearing like someone in this room,” Zhongli says, turning to look at Dottore.

The corner of Zhongli’s lips quirked up when Dottore’s smile slipped off his face. Dottore narrows his eyes at Zhongli and rolls his eyes, looking away from the ex-archon with his arms crossing over his chest.

“Should I make more cookies?” You mutter, staring at the plate intently.

Dainsleif smiles at you. “That is up to you. Do you have enough ingredients for extra batches of cookies?” Dainsleif asks.

You puckered your lips and sighed. “I don’t think I do, but that’s okay! I can make more cookies next time!” You said.

You look at Dainsleif and notice that he has tiny little crumbs at the corner of his lips. You place your cup of milk down on the table before walking over to where he’s standing. You stand on the tip of your toes and wipe the crumbs away.

You look at Dainsleif through your eyelashes. “There were crumbs from the cookies at the corner of your lips. I had to wipe it away,” you murmur. “Although you look cute with cookie crumbs at the corner of your lips.” You giggle.

Dainsleif stares down at you, his cheeks bright pink. You give him a small smile and let your hand fall to your side. You turn and see the others looking at you and Dainsleif with a blank stare; all of them have crumbs at the corners of their lips.

Heizou points to his face. “I have crumbs on my face too. Care to wipe them away for me?” Heizou asks, flashing his pearly whites at you.

You snort and playfully roll your eyes. You walk up to Heizou and dust the crumbs from the corner of Heizou’s lips and cheek. Without saying a word, the men all line up behind Heizou, waiting for you to wipe the chocolate chip cookie crumbs off their faces.

After Childe and Kaeya’s failed attempts at flirting with you, everyone assumes that you are either not interested or they just suck at flirting. Your stay at the estate continues to be peaceful, albeit a little bit awkward, because of the tension between the men and their unspoken competition to see who can ask you out first. While the men have been trying to flirt with you, you see their comments as them showing that they care about you and how attentive they are to you.

One way the men showed that they care about you is when that one time when you fell ill and couldn’t get out of bed because of how fatigued you felt and how weak your limbs were. You woke up one day and could barely open your eyes. All you wanted to do was to sleep in and do nothing at all but sleep.

Your eyes crack open to the sound of knocking coming from your bedroom door. You roll over on your side and keep your eyes close, snuggling up against your blanket and pillow, feeling yourself drift off to sleep. You’re woken up by the sound of a knock coming from behind your door.

You swallow your saliva, feeling it slide down your severely dry throat, causing you to wince. “Yes?” You call out weakly.

You almost didn’t recognize your voice because of how scratchy and dry your throat feels. You clear your throat and weakly reach over to your nightstand for a glass cup of water. You sit up and pour water from the pitcher into the glass cup. The door to your bedroom cracks open, and several men peek into your room and see you chugging the water as if you haven’t drunk anything in days.

After drinking an entire cup of water, you put the cup down on your nightstand and wipe the water from your lips. Even though you chugged a whole cup of water, your throat continues to feel dry and scratchy.

“You don’t look too good, sweetheart,” Gorou frowns.

You smile at him weakly. “I don’t feel well either, Gorou,” you reply.

You clear your throat and plop down on your bed, staring at the ceiling. Baizhu and Dottore push past the men and rush over to your bed. Baizhu and Dottore look down at you. You look like you’re about to pass out at any minute. You have dark circles underneath your eyes, your skin feels cold and clammy when Baizhu presses the back of his hand against your forehead, and your neck feels almost hot.

Dottore frowns and caresses your face in his hands. “Oh, sweetheart. It looks like you have a cold,” Dottore whispers, tucking your hair behind your ears and wiping the sweat from your forehead.

“Stay in bed, alright? We’ll get you medication, and Thoma will make you some soup to eat,” says Baizhu; he turns to look at the blond.

Thoma nods and quickly rushes out of your bedroom and down the stairs to the kitchen to make some soup for you to eat. Baizhu and Dottore leave your side and walks to the infirmary in the estate, leaving you under the care of the other men. Diluc walks over to your bed and sits at the edge, watching you slowly get under the blankets, pulling it up to your chin.

Diluc leans down and presses his lips against your forehead, catching you and the others off guard. Diluc slowly pulls away and brushes the strands of your hair away from your sweaty forehead.

“Get well soon for us, alright? We don’t like seeing you sick,” Diluc murmurs, brushing his thumb against your flushed cheeks.

You pout and attempt to poke his cheek in return, but you feel so weak that your hand falls onto the bed halfway. Diluc’s gaze softens, and he reaches for your hand, giving them a gentle squeeze.

“I don’t know how I got sick. Maybe it’s my lack of sleep that got me sick,” you murmur, curling up into a fetal position and gazing at Diluc with bleary eyes.

Al Haitham leans against the doorway. “Have you been around anyone that’s sick? None of us are sick,” Al Haitham gestures to everyone in the room with an eyebrow raised.

You shake your head. “I don’t think so, but then again, I’ve always had a weak immune system. Unfortunately, having a weak immune system makes me vulnerable to many illnesses and diseases,” you reply.

“Oh no,” Tighnari breathes, rubbing his temples with a sigh.

Kaveh points at you. “So, what you’re telling us is that we should put you in some kind of a bubble to protect you from all kinds of sicknesses, got it.”

You snort and nod, clutching tightly onto your soft blanket. “Yes, Kaveh. That is correct,” you murmur.

Aether looks like he is about to burst into tears; seeing you sick and in this condition worries him a lot. You mentioned that you have a weak immune system means that you’re very vulnerable and are susceptible to getting sick easily. Aether doesn’t want to see you suffer and be bedridden because your immune system isn’t strong enough to fight off many diseases and illnesses. Aether walks to you and sits across from Diluc, close to your thighs.

Aether leans down and rests his head on your stomach, wrapping his arms around your waist. “Please get well soon. I want you to be healthy, happy, and with me,” Aether looks up at you with a small pout on his face.

You chuckle and run your fingers through his soft blonde hair. “Aether, I’m always with you and the others. I hope I can recover from this cold because it’s a pain in the ass to be sick,” you murmur, pinching his cheek lightly.

Aether pouts after seeing that you didn’t know what he had implied earlier. The sound of stifled snickers fills your bedroom. Aether narrows his eyes and slowly turns to the group of men by your door, hiding their grins behind their hands.

“Another failed attempt, but this time, it’s by Aether,” Venti whispers to Xiao, hiding his snickers behind his hand.

Xiao rolls his eyes, looking away from the bard while biting back a smile that threatens to appear on his face. Aether gets off of you and walks over to the two anemo vision wielders, scrunching his face up at them. A few minutes later, Baizhu and Dottore walk into your room with medicine in their hands and a surgical mask for you to wear while you’re sick.

Thoma enters the room a few minutes later with a tray of food in his hands, setting the tray down in front of you after you sit up on the bed. The aroma of the soup made your stomach rumble with hunger. You place a cloth napkin over your lap while Diluc holds your hair back, adjusting it so your hair wouldn’t fall into your soup while you eat.

“You should take your medicine after eating because the medicine might make your stomach feel queasy when you take it on an empty stomach,” says Thoma.

You nod. “You’re right, Thoma. Especially when it’s a liquid medicine for a cold,” you murmur, holding the medicine bottle up to your face and reading the words. “Are these the type to be taken during the day, or is it the one that will knock me out cold?” You ask, looking up at Baizhu and Dottore.

“Since when are there two different kinds of cold medicines?” Scaramouche asks, walking over to where you’re sitting and taking the bottle from your hands.

“One type of cold medicine is taken during the day, the other is for the night because it should help you sleep through the night without waking up to a coughing fit,” replies Ayato.

“Which is what happened to me last night,” you sigh, eating the porridge that Thoma cooked for you. “I feel like I got run over by a sumpter beast,” you grumble.

“You look like you got run over by one too, but that doesn’t take away from your beauty, snookums!” Childe says, trotting over to you with a smile on his face.

Dainsleif rolls his eyes. “What a charmer. Is this how you land the first date with [Y/N]?” Dainsleif asks Childe, the corner of his lips quirking up into a smirk.

Childe stops in his tracks, turns around, and stares at Dainsleif with his mouth agape. You’re too busy eating your food to notice the tension growing between Childe and Dainsleif. You suddenly drop the spoon in the bowl and reach for the cloth napkin on your lap and sneeze into it.

“How heavy is the dose of medicine? I need it to knock me out cold,” you sniffled.

Albedo grabs the medicine bottle from Scaramouche’s hand and looks at the label. The bottle didn’t have a specific label on how strong the medicine was, but what it did have were instructions on how much a certain age group should take.

Albedo holds the bottle out in front of you and shows the instruction to you. “It didn’t specify how strong the medicine is going to be for your sickness, but it does have dosage on how much you should take. Since you’re an adult, it’s best to take the highest dosage every five hours,” Albedo says, pointing at the top of the mini chart.

Your face pinches up, and you reluctantly grab the bottle from his hands. “Alright, I will take these after I’m done eating,” you grumble before continuing to eat your breakfast (or is it lunch?).

After finishing your bowl of soup, you take the tiny plastic cup off the bottle and place it on the food tray in front of you. You attempt to twist the cap open, only to fail. You stare at the bottle before squeezing the sides of the lid and turning it. You let out a frustrated huff of breath and put the bottle on the food tray, glaring at it. Either you’re weak from your sickness, or you’re dumb.

“What’s the matter?” Kazuha asks.

You grab the bottle and try to open the lid, failing once again. You let out an annoyed groan and nearly slam it on the food tray.

“I can’t open it,” you grumble, looking over at the twenty-five men with a deep frown on your face. “It’s a new bottle too! I swear, I followed the instructions, and I still can’t open the dang bottle,” you groused.

Without saying a word, Xiao walks over to you, takes the bottle from your hand, and inspects it for a moment before twisting the cap open with ease. He hands you the lid and bottle, staring at you.

“You were supposed to squeeze the side of the bottle,” Xiao says.

You stare at Xiao in shock and grab the bottle and lid from his hands. “I did do that! It also said to press down on the lid, pinch the sides, and twist the cap,” you explain.

Xiao gives you an odd look. “You don’t need to press down on the lid. You just squeeze the side of the lid and twist it open,” replies Xiao.

Xiao takes the bottle from your hand, closes the bottle with the lid, and demonstrates how he opened the bottle. You stare at Xiao’s hands, watching him twist the bottle open with ease. You try to do the same, only to fail.

“That bottle has favoritism,” you accuse, pushing the bottle away from you with a glare.

A few seconds after pushing the bottle away from you, you grab the bottle, mimic what Xiao did, and successfully open the bottle. You let out a slow sigh, shaking your head. You pour the liquid medicine into the small measuring bottle for the appropriate measurement. After getting the perfect measurement of the liquid medicine, you close the bottle and down the liquid medication. The taste of the medication was something you had never tasted before. It’s disgusting, but you know that if you want to get well soon, you need to take it.

You force yourself to swallow the medication and reach for the water pitcher and the glass cup, pouring water into the cup and chugging the water. Once you have emptied the glass cup, you put the pitcher and cup down on your nightstand; violent shivers rack your body.

Your face pinches up with disgust. “That tastes disgusting,” you shiver, shaking your head.

Cyno shrugs and chuckles. “Hey, it’s medicine. Medicine isn’t supposed to taste appetizing like candy,” says Cyno.

Dottore and Baizhu take the liquid medicine from your hands while Thoma takes the food tray and napkin off your lap. You want to lay down on your bed, but you think you should let your food and medication settle down in your stomach before lying down. Or else there’s a possible chance that the food and medicine will come back up.

“Are you not going to go back to sleep?” Pantalone asks.

You shake your head. “Not yet. I’m letting everything settle down in my stomach first before going back to sleep. Other than that, have any of you eaten anything?” You ask.

“We ate already. We assumed you were going to come downstairs for breakfast, but you never came down,” replies Capitano.

You give Capitano a weak smile and run your fingers through your hair. “I was so tired that I could barely get out of bed. I didn’t even notice that I slept in until I woke up to the sound of knocking at my door,” you said.

“When you’re feeling healthy again, what do you think about joining me in having lunch or dinner at the Liuli Pavilion?” Zhongli asks, sitting down beside you and caressing your face in his hands.

Your eyes light up, and you nod eagerly. “Ooh! I would love to, Zhongli! I just hope I heal soon because dining at Liuli Pavilion sounds amazing right now, even though I just ate,” you said.

Zhongli smiles and strokes the apples of your cheeks with the pad of his thumb. Zhongli looks at the others from the corners of his eyes, a faint smirk appearing on his face. The men shoot a glare in Zhongli’s direction after seeing a smug smile on the former archon’s face.

Pierro clears his throat. “I heard that Liuli Pavilion serves a lot of food for their customers. If it’s just you and Zhongli going alone, would you two be able to finish all of that food? I think everyone should be able to tag along as well,” Pierro says gruffly.

You blink at Pierro and look at Zhongli, who seems displeased. You shrug and rub the back of your neck awkwardly. You have gone to Liuli Pavilion before, but it was never alone with Zhongli or anyone else that lives in the abode. You think they only bring out a certain amount of food if you ordered certain food on the menu.

“I mean, Zhongli did invite me. I think it should be up to him to make that decision,” you murmur, looking at Zhongli through your lashes.

Zhongli stares at you, then look over at the men, who are giving him puppy dog eyes and mischievous smiles. Zhongli rolls his eyes and sighs through his nose, rubbing his temples. If Zhongli declines, it will make him look bad. If he agrees, then he wouldn’t get to have some alone time with you away from the others. It’s a lose-lose situation for the former archon either way.

“If the others are free and have nothing on their schedule, then they can join us, dearest. If they’re unable to join us, then it’ll be just you and me at Liuli Pavilion,” Zhongli answers, squeezing your hand gently.

You turn to look at the men. “Zhongli says it's up to all of you whether you guys want to join Zhongli and me or not,” you said.

“We’ll clear our schedule when the day comes,” Pierro states.

The men behind Pierro nod their heads in agreement. While you give them small smiles and prepare to take another nap, Zhongli is giving the men a not-so-subtle glare. Some of the men collectively smile at Zhongli innocently, while others give Zhongli a smug grin at Zhongli’s irritation at not being able to spend time alone with you.

After you have found a comfortable position to lie down and sleep, Zhongli presses a gentle kiss on your forehead. You smile up at Zhongli and caress his face in your hand. Zhongli places his hand over yours and closes his eyes with contentment. Feeling a sneeze coming up, you pull your hand from Zhongli’s face and sneeze into your elbow twice.

“Alright, little one, you need to go to sleep now. If you don’t get enough sleep, your body won’t be able to fight off the illness,” Dottore says, smiling at you at the entrance of your room.

You feel Zhongli press one last kiss on your hot forehead before getting off your bed and walking over to your bedroom door. The others soon follow behind Zhongli: they all give you forehead kisses before leaving your bedroom to let you sleep in peace.

A few weeks later, it was Venti’s turn to attempt to flirt with you. The anemo archon has a stack of ballads prepared just for this very special day. He is excited to perform for you and impress you with the poems that he has created. You have always been the source of his inspiration, and he cannot wait to showcase something special with you.

You’re laying on a hammock outside of the estate under the trees. The wind rocks the hammock back and forth while you look at the early afternoon sky through the orange leaves. You stretch and let out a groan, feeling a satisfying pop. You hear a soft melody flow in the wind, making you prop yourself up on your arms and search for where the melody is coming from.

You see Venti strolling up to your hammock while gently strumming his lyre. Venti smiles at you and stops next to your hammock. You sit up and hug the pillow against your chest, looking at the bard curiously.

“Care to listen to a few ballads of mine? Just to let you know, you’re the source of my inspiration,” Venti says, winking at you.

You feel your face heat up. “I would love to listen to your ballads, Venti!” You chirp.

You scoot over to the left and pat the empty spot next to you on the hammock. Venti gracefully lifts himself onto the hammock, sitting beside you. Venti clears his throat and adjusts his lyre in his hands. Venti begins strumming the lyre, the soft melody filling the quiet air between you two. Venti starts humming and swaying to the song. He looks up at you and gives you the sweetest smile.

Before Venti could sing, the strings of the lyre snapped. Venti gasps in horror and looks at the lyre, freaking out about how he is going to fix the lyre before the other men start to butt into your and his quiet space. You and Venti hear a slow clap coming from a distance, looking up to see the men walking toward you and Venti.

“What a performance of a lifetime, Barbatos,” Kaeya chuckles, crossing his arms over his chest.

Venti gives the twenty-four men a fake smile before turning to you with a fake laugh, the apples of his cheeks almost as red as Diluc’s hair.

You look at Venti and his lyre worriedly. “It’s okay if you’re not able to perform for me, Venti. You can perform for me any time!” You reach for Venti’s hand and squeeze it gently.

Venti looks defeated; if he had dog ears, they would be flat on his head while giving you puppy dog eyes. You give Venti a sympathetic smile and pull him into a hug, catching him and the others off guard.

“When you get the strings fixed, come to my room, and you can play all of the ballads you like,” you murmur into his ears, tucking his hair behind his ear. “I’ll be expecting your visitation, Barbatos,” you stroke his hair.

Venti audibly gulps, pulling away from your hug with a red face. A big smile breaks out on Venti’s face, and he nods his head eagerly, planting a big kiss on your cheeks before scrambling out of the hammock to get the lyre fixed as soon as possible. Sure, he can fix it by snapping his fingers, but the look on the other men’s faces is scary, and he needs to disappear for a few hours.

“So much for ruining the moment between [Y/N] and Venti,” Itto mutters, crossing his arms over his chest with a frustrated sigh.

Childe nods. “Yeah, no kidding. Instead of ruining their moment together, we pushed them together. And now Venti will be showing up to [Y/N]’s bedroom after he gets his lyre fixed,” Childe grumbles, kicking the dirt beneath his foot like an angry toddler.

“It would be a shame if we walk into [Y/N]’s room before the performance starts,” Aether shrugs his shoulders.

If you think the men walking in on your and Venti’s supposed quiet moment, imagine the men insisting on keeping you company while you’re in the hot springs. Butt naked. You dip your hair into the hot water and wring the water out, leaning against the walls of the hot spring with a sigh, feeling your muscles relax.

The sound of water running in the hot springs is interrupted by the sound of chatter approaching the bathhouse in the abode. Your eyes shoot open, and you sink into the water until the water reaches your chin, your arms over your chest to preserve your modesty. The doors to the bathhouse open, and the men walk into the hotspring. All are shirtless, wearing towels around their waist. The towels hung low at their hips; the towels looked like they could slip off at any moment.

“Oh, [Y/N]! What a pleasant surprise to see you here at the bathhouse!” Pantalone says casually, smiling at you as he stops in front of the hot spring you’re currently sitting in.

You couldn’t tell if your face was feeling hot because of the temperature in the bathhouse or if it was because of the twenty-five shirtless (almost naked men) in front of you. You audibly gulp and give them a wary smile, continuing to keep most of your body submerged in the waters.

You laugh awkwardly. “I didn’t think all of you would be coming to the bathhouse at the same time that I do,” you say, keeping your arms pressed against your chest.

“Oh? Are we not allowed to visit the bathhouse while you’re here?” Capitano asks, propping his hands on his hips.

Your eyes trail over Capitano’s bare chest. His chest was littered with scars, fresh and old scars. His pecks are definitely bigger than Al Haitham and Itto’s pecks. But they don’t compare to Pierro’s pecks. Your face gradually becomes hotter, making you sink further into the water. You look away from them after seeing knowing smirks on their faces.

“No, no! You can visit the bathhouse whenever! But uh, there are empty hot springs over there,” you point over to the hot spring three feet away from where yours is located.

Kaveh huffs and crosses his arms over his chest. “What if we want to keep you company in the same hot spring?” Kaveh asks, raising his eyebrows at you with an overly exaggerated frown.

“Then you can keep me company from a distance! Just not in the same hot spring as me,” you reply as you point over at the hot spring three feet away from you.

There’s no way in hell you’re going to let these men sit in the same hot springs as you. All of you are naked, and you don’t want people to see you naked. Heck, you never looked at yourself naked in the mirror before! These men have great physiques, and you have seen them shirtless plenty of times before, but have you seen them naked before? That is something you won’t be talking about right now.

“Alright, but that won’t stop us from coming over to talk to you,” Tighnari says, patting your head as he walks to the nearest hot spring.

You shut your eyes and cover your face with your hands when you hear towels dropping to the ground and splashes of water coming from the hot spring near yours. You assume that everyone has gotten into the hot spring a few feet from yours and uncover your eyes. You look around for your towel and nearly cry when you realize that your towel is hanging on the wall five feet from where you’re at. You sink into the water, feeling shame and embarrassment for leaving your towel there because you’re unaware that the men are going to join you at the bathhouse. You continue to press yourself against the wall of the hot spring, praying that no one will approach the hot spring you’re sitting in. You’re not in the mood to talk to anyone because everyone is naked, and you don’t want to see anyone’s bare asses (that’s a lie, you do, but let’s pretend that you don’t), nor do you want them to see your bare ass.

“Are you okay, [Y/N]?” You hear Gorou call out to you.

You turn your head and see Gorou looking at you curiously, his head peeking from the edge of the hot spring. You give Gorou a fake smile and nod. You might as well pretend that you’re okay, or else they’ll approach you while naked. If you continue to stay, who knows what’s going to happen?

You clear your throat. “I’m fine, Gorou! I, uh, I’m trying to relax in the hot spring,” you say, chewing on the inside of your cheek.

“You know, going to the hot spring alone isn’t fun. It’s too quiet, and it feels a little bit lonely, don’t you think?” Heizou asks, resting his arms on the edge of the hot spring.

You nod. “That is true, but sometimes, it’s nice to have some alone time for yourself. It’s a good way to clear your mind and relax,” you say.

You push yourself away from the wall of the hot spring before fully submerging in the water. You emerge from the water and push your hair out of your face, wiping the water from your face while keeping most of your body hidden in the water.

“You look lonely over there. Doesn’t [Y/N] look lonely over there, Thoma?” Ayato asks, peeking over at you from where he’s sitting before glancing at the blond man beside him.

Thoma peeks at you and nods. “Yes, they look quite lonely over there, my Lord,” Thoma agrees.

You narrow your eyes at the men and slowly sink into the water up to your chin. “What do you guys have in mind?” You drawled out.

“Oh, nothing you need to worry about! We’re just commenting on how lonely it must be over there. If you do feel lonely, you can always come over here and join us all, or let us keep you company over there,” Baizhu says, leaning back in the hot spring.

“I’m actually going to leave the bathhouse very soon,” you reply, internally panicking about how you’re going to leave the bathhouse without the others seeing you butt-ass naked.

With your towel hanging far from the springs, there’s no way the others wouldn’t see your bare ass when you hop out of the hot spring and run to the towel. Plus, running isn’t permitted in the bathhouse because that is a hazard waiting to happen. You’re not going to risk slipping and cracking your skull open in the bathhouse in front of everyone with your bits on full display.

“Oh? You’re leaving so soon,” Albedo says, frowning while slicking his hair back.

You laugh nervously. “I have been here for a while. My fingers are starting to get pruney,” you said, holding up your hand to show the men your wrinkly fingertips.

“You can still hang out with us while wearing a towel. We’ll make sure that everyone behaves,” Kazuha says, turning to look at the men with a look.

You point at the towel on the wall. “I would get my towel, but the towel is far, and I don’t want to leave the hot spring to grab the towel,” you said, puckering your lips.

“Don’t worry your pretty little head about it. I got this,” Scaramouche says.

Scaramouche uses his anemo vision, ignoring the look the other anemo users shot in his direction. Despite Scaramouche possessing both an anemo and electro vision, he uses his anemo vision the most and his electro vision to zap those around him. You grab your towel that was hovering in the air and gesture for the men to turn around or shield their eyes. The men turn around and cover their eyes.

You get out of the hot spring and wrap the towel around your body. Once you have tightened the towel around your body, you let the men know you’re covered. The men uncover their eyes and motion for you to walk to where they’re sitting. While walking over to the hot spring where they’re relaxing, you wring the water out of your hair and grab an extra towel on the towel rack and wrap your hair in the towel, letting it sit on your head.

“Are you free three days from now?” Al Haitham asks, watching you dip your legs into the hot spring.

You pause and contemplate. Three days from now? What day will that be?

“I think so? I don’t think I have anything planned that day other than going to school….” You murmur, tightening your grip on the towel around your body. “Why?” You ask, looking at Al Haitham quizzically.

“He’s just wondering if you’re free on a Tuesday, that’s all,” Cyno interjects, shooting Al Haitham a not-so-subtle glare.

Al Haitham glares back at Cyno and rolls his eyes, crossing his arms over his bare chest. You look away after finding yourself staring at Al Haitham’s chest. You clear your throat shyly and shrug your shoulders.

“Well, I don’t think I have anything planned that day. I should be free,” you said, trying to distract yourself from the naked men in front of you.

Diluc nods. “Good, then that settles then,” Diluc states.

“Settles what?” You ask.

“You’ll know when the time comes. For now, we can’t tell you what it is,” Dainsleif says, slicking his hair back.

You scrunch your face at Dainsleif’s response and the men’s vagueness. “Aw! You guys are no fun for not telling me what you guys have in store,” you huff.

Pantalone chuckles and squeezes your calf under the water. “You’ll see when the time comes, sweetheart,” Pantalone says.

Fast forward to a few days later, you’re out in Mondstadt buying flowers to plant in the abode. Recently, you have decided that you wanted the abode to have a garden. To be more specific, you wanted the other floating island (next to where the estates are located) to be full of flowers from all over Teyvat. It would be nice to sit in a field full of flowers from different regions, and why not start doing it now?

Plus, the men gave you this idea earlier in the morning and sent you out into the world to gather some seeds to plant these flowers in the abode. Now, what they didn’t tell you is that you can buy these seeds from Tubby. After purchasing the seeds of the flowers you’re looking for, you bid Flora goodbye before turning to leave the city. The next city you’re going to stop by is Liyue. When you’re about to leave the city of Mondstadt, Diluc, and Kaeya walk up to you.

“Oh, Diluc and Kaeya! What are you two doing here?” You ask, placing the small packet of flower seeds into your bag.

“We’re here to keep you company, if you don’t mind,” Kaeya says, smiling at you.

Your eyes light up. “Of course, I don’t mind! I’m about to leave for Liyue to buy flower seeds! I’m thinking glaze lilies, silk flowers, and violetgrass,” you said, pulling your small notepad out from your bag.

“Instead of silk flowers, why not go for Qingxin instead?” Diluc asks, raising his eyebrows at you.

You purse your lips and sigh. “You know, I would do that, but I already placed my order for glaze lilies, silk flowers, and violetgrass,” you sulk.

Kaeya gives you a sympathetic smile before pulling you into his arms, stroking your hair, and pressing his lips on the top of your head. Diluc crosses his arms over his chest, looking unamused after seeing the display of affection between you and Kaeya. Kaeya smirks, and Diluc turns and walks off with you in his arms. Diluc rolls his eyes and follows the two of you, pulling you out of Kaeya’s arms.

While you, Diluc, and Kaeya are in Liyue, the men are scrambling around the abode, making sure things are going well and according to plan. So far, everything has been going smoothly. The flowers are arriving on time, and so are the decorations. Diluc and Kaeya are instructed to return to the estate while you’re in Sumeru, picking up the last order you have placed for Sumeru roses and Padisarahs. Their main goal is to keep you distracted and out of the abode until you have picked up every last order of the flower seeds from the four nations.

“You don’t think [Y/N] is going to return to the abode so soon, do you?” Venti asks Dainsleif nervously.

Dainsleif shakes his head. “I don’t think they are. If they were to return to the abode earlier than expected, then everything should be fine,” Dainsleif says.

“Exactly! Plus, things have been sailing smoothly, and arriving earlier than expected. It’s fine because we don’t know when [Y/N] will return to the abode with the flower seeds they have ordered from four different nations,” Aether says, fixing his shirt and smoothing out the creases.

“Was it necessary to have [Y/N] run around Teyvat to buy flower seeds when they can buy them from Tubby?” Heizou asks, pointing at the teapot spirit.

Cyno walks into the estate, holding a vase of Sumeru roses. “For today, yes. It’s necessary,” Cyno replies.

“What if they’re allergic to some of the flowers that are being brought into the estate?” Itto asks, poking the Sumeru rose when Cyno walks past him.

Al Haitham rolls his eyes and fixes the sleeve of his blazer. “They’re not from this world, Itto. I don’t think they would want to have a large garden if they were allergic to the flowers we’re bringing into the abode,” Al Haitham mutters.

“Nor would we send them out into Teyvat with Diluc and Kaeya to buy flower seeds,” Kaveh interjects, giving Itto a look.

Back on Teyvat, you, Diluc, and Kaeya step into Sumeru. You smell the fresh air and tuck the flower seeds into your bag. Sumeru is your last destination, and you can’t wait to go back to the abode and start planning how you want the garden to be arranged. You weren’t sure if you wanted to have a large dome for the separate island or let the flowers be fully exposed to the abode’s sunlight.

You walk to the flower shop in Sumeru with Diluc and Kaeya by your side, checking off the items on your list. You made sure to choose around two to three flowers from each nation. You’re mainly choosing the flowers the men have recommended for you to get. That includes an amakumo fruit, and you’re not entirely sure why they wanted you to pick the amakumo fruit, but you did, and that is probably the last time you visit Seirai island. Needless to say, you didn’t like the atmosphere of the island, nor did you like the sound of thunder booming in the sky while you were searching for the fruit.

While you’re waiting for the merchant to come out from behind the shop with your order, Diluc and Kaeya informed you that they have businesses to tend to and would meet you back at the abode. You watch the two men leave before looking at the list in your hand.

“I don’t think I’ll have enough seeds to fill the floating island with flowers,” you grumble, pulling the small packets of flower seeds. “Five packets for each flower is not going to cover the entire island,” you deadpan.

“[Y/N]? I have your order here! Five packets of Sumeru Rose seeds and Padisarahs, am I correct?” The merchant asks, emerging from behind the curtains and holding up your order.

He walks toward you with a clipboard in his other hand. You give the merchant a nod, now realizing that the number of packets you have isn’t enough. The merchant has you sign the paperwork to confirm that you stopped by the flower shop and picked up the order Tighnari has placed under your name.

After signing the paper, the merchant hands your order before giving you a small note on how to take care of the flowers. You put the packet of Sumeru rose and Padisarah seeds into your bag before walking out of the shop, reading over the note the merchant wrote. To be honest, you don’t think the instruction was necessary because Tighnari has informed you that he will be showing you how to care for the flowers.

“Back to the abode I go,” you said.

The abode is located in the small corner of Sumeru City, tucked away from the public eye. Only you and the men know where the teapot is placed. You yawn and stretch your arms. You stand in front of the teapot and let it whisk you home. Once you have entered the teapot, you walk to the estate and stop in your tracks almost immediately when you notice the entrance to the main estate is wide open.

“Did someone forget to close the door?” You mutter.

You adjust the straps of your bag on your shoulder and jog to the entrance. When you enter the estate and close the door behind you, you notice the interior of the estate is very pink and red. Flowers are lined up against the walls of the estate; balloons are tied to the railing, and party streamers are hung from the ceiling.

“What is the occasion?” You ask, turning to the formally dressed men in front of you. “Also,” you pull the packets of flower seeds from your bag, “these are not going to cover the entire area of the floating island next door,” you said.

“[Y/N], what’s important right now? The flower seeds, or us attempting to ask you to go out with us?” Thoma asks, quirking an eyebrow at you.

You stare at Thoma blankly and at the other men. Not only are they dressed nicely, but each man is holding flowers from their respective region. Some flowers you have never seen before, but they’re beautiful. Speaking of them dressing nicely, how come they look nice and you look like you’re going on a walk?

“Are you guys trying to ask me to be your significant other, or are you guys trying to ask me to be your Valentine?” You ask, taking your bag off and setting it down on the table near the entrance.

“Uh, both?” Baizhu says.

“What’s Valentine’s Day?” Scaramouche mutters, looking at Xiao quizzically.

Xiao shrugs his shoulders in response. How in the world is he supposed to know what Valentine’s Day is?

Childe steps to the front and pulls you toward him, your chest pressing against his chest. Childe caresses your face in his hands and smiles at you.

“Do you know how hard it is to flirt with you?” Childe asks.

You blink at him. “What do you mean?”

“You’re intelligent, but you can be a little bit dense. I think the better term for it would be oblivious,” Albedo interjects, the corners of his lips curving up.

You hold your hand up in defense. “Listen, I have never had anyone flirt with me before. Whether in this world or my world, I never flirted with anyone, nor have they flirted with me. Even if they flirt with me, I wouldn’t know how to respond because, well, I….” you trail off.

Do you have to explain to the men that you have no game? You never had a boyfriend, you never flirted with anyone, no one has ever flirted with you, and you’ve never been out on a date before, so how in the world are you supposed to be able to notice it?

“Oh, trust me, many of us have tried to flirt with you. It would either go over your head, or one of us would ruin each other’s chances of asking you out,” Ayato chuckles.

“And some of us,” Tighnari looks over at Childe, “has made it blatantly obvious too.”

Dottore pushes Childe away from you, grabbing your hand and planting a kiss on your knuckles. “What do you say, [Y/N]? Will you be my Valentine?” Dottore asks, gazing at you through his mask.

“Your Valentine?! I’m sure [Y/N] would much rather be my Valentine and not yours,” Xiao huffs, glaring at the icy-blue-haired Harbinger.

You puckered your lips, your eyebrows narrow, and you gestured to them. “I have to pick between all of you?” You ask.

“That is correct. Unless you have another thing in mind?” Zhongli raises his eyebrows at you.

“What if…. I reject all of you?” You ask jokingly.

Gorou looks at you nervously. “Please don’t. I don’t think my heart will be able to handle it,” Gorou whispers, clutching his chest.

“Well, if I can’t choose all of you, then I might as well reject all of you,” you huff, crossing your arms over your chest.

Kazuha raises his eyebrows at you, and a small smirk appears. “You want all of us?” Kazuha asks.

You press your lips into a thin line and nod. “That’s correct. I mean, we all live in the abode together. I either take all of you for myself or none of you,” You said, shrugging your shoulders. “I know what I want, but do you know what you want?” You ask.

“Yes, we know what we want, and it’s certainly not each other,” Capitano says, earning a snort from you.

Pantalone pokes the inside of his cheek with his tongue. “Is this going to be another failed attempt of asking [Y/N] to be ours?” Pantalone murmurs to Pierro.

“Archons, I hope not,” Pierro sighs.

You shrug and look around the estate. “It won’t be a failed attempt if I get to choose all of you,” you said nonchalantly.

Heizou clasps his hands. “How about this: you will be our Valentine, and we’ll be your Valentine. None of us,” Heizou gestures to him and the other men around him, “will be a couple of any sort with each other. We date you, and you date us. We have no interest in each other. We’re only interested in you.”

You squint your eyes. “Okay, that doesn’t sound bad. But what about the jealousy? I know some of you can get jealous and possessive,” you said, giving certain men in the room a side-eye.

Dainsleif sighs. “We’ll get used to sharing you, eventually,” Dainsleif says.

“So? Will you be our Valentine? More importantly: will you be ours?” Thoma asks nervously.

“Did you hear a no?” You smile at them.

“We didn’t hear a yes,” Childe scrunches his nose at you.

You roll your eyes playfully. “Yes, I’ll be all of your Valentines. And yes, I gladly accept being your partner,” you said.

Did that make sense? You scratch your head.

“Oh, thank archons, this isn’t one of the many failed attempts,” Aether sighs in relief, tackling you into a hug.

Tighnari bats at Aether. “Hey, move it. I want to give [Y/N] a hug, too,” Tighnari’s ears twitch with irritation.

Cyno pushes Tighnari to the side. “Then get in the back of the line and don’t cut,” Cyno retorts.

Al Haitham snorts. “How juvenile,” he mutters, gazing at Tighnari and Cyno with an amused look on his face.

Note: I'm going to try to update my navigation post soon because I don't like how it looks. I think a makeover is what it needs, but I never got around to it. The only thing I'm debating on is to make a new navigation post or change the one I have currently pinned to my blog 🤔 Anyway, next week's fic is a request. I have been planning this one request for a few weeks now and I hope it turns out how I want it to. Anyway, for those who want to be on my new taglist, here is the link to the taglist [Genshinluvr Updated Taglist Form]! Please make sure that you allow people to mention you/tag you in posts, or else I won't be able to tag you in any future fanfics! And as usual, I ONLY post on my Tumblr (Genshinluvr) and my AO3 (Aaliah_exo)! Nowhere else except Tumblr and AO3!

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