skinnyskidreams
Cloudy Dreams
This started as a fitblr...and partially still is. The rest is a peek inside my mind.
Hello, where-ever you are/
I am 26 years old. 5'7 1/2".
Already went from 160+ (my highest weight ever) to 150 (May 2012). Down to ~130 (January 2017, but ballpark since about Jan 2016)
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I’M THERE! I AM FUCKING THERE!!!
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So uh...I don’t seem to post on tumblr much anymore. For those of you still with me: I moved to the city last year, I have a corporate job that I like (never thought I’d say those words), I’ve hiked a LOT of mountains over the past couple years, basically eat whatever I want that’s not super sugary (because added sugar always makes me feel ill, as do too many grains), and um...life’s going pretty well. Oh yeah, and I publicly came out as bi. That happened too.
#my face#me#life update#mountains#fitspo#happy#work#hiking#healthy eating#sugar is poison#bisexuality#lgbtq#pride#130lbs#I almost have abs
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my face as of about 2 weeks ago. I don’t wear much makeup almost ever anymore.
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long time no post
getting karmic retribution for dumping that guy last year. in the reverse of that situation. hoping for absolution from this. I do have a new job starting in 3 days, which is exciting. I’m moving later today...sort of. still need to find a place to live.
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37-26-37
wayooooooooo. it’s called “the mountain diet.” I eat normally (ie whatever the fuck I want that doesn’t make me dizzy or tired or upset stomach), don’t drink, hike a lot, and be happy...working pretty. damn. well. (last time I weighed I was down to 136lb. I’m not trying to lose weight. it’s just happening.)
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today is the first time in ages that I’ve even craved self harm. which I suppose is a good thing. I want to do it so badly, but I literally don’t remember the last time it occurred to me. :/
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140
also got back down to 140 about 2 weeks ago. which is nice because I’m not calorie tracking anymore, so it feels much healthier this time. also Jan-Feb-March added up to 103 hours of exercise...the same thing last year was 74, and the year previous was like 52. so that’s pretty sweet.
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it’s been like six weeks since I broke up with him. it wasn’t fair to either of us that he had stronger feelings.
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so I finally made a move toward maybe doing some modeling. sent in a submission to a local agency. going to an open call in March.
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of course NZ named a mountain "MOUNT BALLOON"
Mt Balloon
Fiordland National Park ~ New Zealand
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Mountains make so much more sense than people
and nothing makes me less attracted to them. why is it so difficult for me to want a wonderful, earnest man who is head over heels for me? but I'm just...bored. finding other people attractive. feeling like I'm an asshole. trying to care about him more, trying everything I can think of to make it work and it's just not enough. everything he is should make me happy...but it doesn't. :(
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Self-esteem 4 years ago v. now
If someone told me I was pretty 4 years ago:
2 years ago:
Now:
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distance
is agonizing. I am so happy but drives me nuts to not be able to see him or touch him. 4 hours seems so far.
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…you too? http://ift.tt/1tZZot1
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Look past your thoughts so you may drink the pure nectar of this moment - Rumi
☮ ❤ॐ
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