accidentallyadoptedbybatman
Gothamite trying to get by
Once a gothamite always a gothamite
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I think that Bruce (as Brucie Wayne the playboy, and as Batman the Dark Knight and, Bruce the father,) is pretty like Gotham is but in different ways
Brucie Wayne is pretty like the lights of Gotham. Her neon bar and club lights. The galas with the reflections from crystals on the walls. The streetlights down the foggy roads. The cars with their lights shining through all the gases in the air. And the Bat signal in her sky.
Batman is pretty like Gotham's chaos. Her buildings burning. The violence and the hope. The attacks on her people from her people. The blood on her streets and the sirens in the air. And the bats' shadow and the promise it brings. The promise of blood and relief. The promise of safety and iron bars.
But Bruce
Bruce, B, Dad, Father, Pops, Old man. Bruce is pretty like the mornings of Gotham. The sun shining through the mist down on the finally quiet city. The families waking up and having breakfast. The kids running through the streets looking for food and new discoveries. The coffees carried in hand.
Bruce is the city during her small moments of peace where the people can think "Life is good" and be just a little less worried about the next Arkham breakout.
#THOUGHTS PEOPLE THOUGHTS#BRUCE WAYNE IS PRETTY LIKE GOTHAM AND EMOBIES HER AS SO#batman#dc#bruce wayne#batfam#gotham#batfamily#gothamite#your local gothamite trying to get by
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actually the League has an informal but secretly very strict rule that Batman and Superman can’t sleep together/date/anything because it would impact the stability of the entire League, from their strategy meetings down to communication in the field. There’s too much tension between them as it is — no one can afford for them to add to it.
Cue Bruce Wayne and Clark Kent sleeping together and desperately trying to keep it a secret from their fellow League members.
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you have Correct headcannons, thank you
i'm honoured you think so i shall try and keep it up
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your auntie sounds fucking awesome tell her id pay good money to witness her beat joker
To my fellow Gothamites
Does anyone remember that one day, before we had Signal, that during the morning at like 10am Joker held a Gala hostage as a weird Happy Birthday to himself and Batman just Did Not Show??
And Joker got so upset after 6 hours that he jusT LEFT?? Like he didn't even kill anyone he straight up just left and from that day since he's rarely to almost never attacked during the day
That wasn't a fucking fever dream was it??
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personally i think dc should give dick grayson his long hair back for the specific reason that current modern trends would mean that canon dick grayson having a manbun is a very real possibility that i would give my firstborn child to see
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I love the idea of Tim and Bruce being the two smartest people in batfam; So they occasionally say weird things that only they can understand.
Dick, panicked: OH MY GOD! I asked Kory out. What should I do now? What if she won't like me?
Bruce: Schrödinger's cat.
Dick:
Dick: ...what?
Tim: He's saying you won't findout unless you actually try it and go on a date with her.
Dick: Aww! That's so nice. Thanks, B.
Jason: Who's Schrödinger's cat?
...
Tim, with soaked shirt:
Duke: What happened?
Tim: The driving frequency corresponded to the resonance frequency of coffee, therefore the sloshing amplitude reached its maximum.
Duke: Say what again??
Bruce: He spilled his coffee.
Duke:
Duke: ...right.
Jason: Fucking weirdos.
#bet sometimes they dont even mean to do it but their brains still in detective mode so they do#bruce wayne#batman#tim drake#batfamily
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Random convo I bet happen between civilians and vigilantes
Civilian: What hair product do you use man?? My man's hair is shiiiiining
Nightwing, chuckling: I just let it dry (lying)
Civilian: Naaaah, man I see you jumping from rooftop to rooftop everyday, tell me your secrets–
---
Gothamite: And who's gonna pay for this scratch on my car?!!!
Robin (Tim), trying damn hard to stay stealth: Don't you have insurance?
Gothamite, don't giving a fuck: No!
Robin: You should have–
Gothamite: You know what? HEY TWO-FACE–
Robin: No, no, no– Hold on–
Gothamite: HE'S RIGHT HE–
---
Gothamite: Okay- Cannabis is very much legal in L.A.
Batman: We're not in L.A.
Gothamite: Yeah that's funny because– *runs*
Batman: *Runs after him.*
---
Gothamite: See I don't hate you
Signal: Always good to hear that–
Gothamite: You doing a pretty good job.
Signal: I–
Gothamite, also a bus driver: But you gotta stop being thrown at my window–
Signal: I don't control where villains throw me.
Gothamite: Yeah bro– But you better start, otherwise there's gonna be one more out there–
---
Gothamite, also a security guard on his phone at 3 am: Yeah, no honey it's literally desert here–
Gothamite: HOLY SHIT
Batman:
Gothamite: Fucking warn a guy, mY GOD–
---
Gothamite: I thought you were taller.
Nightwing: I heard that a lot.
---
Gothamite: How do you see on that thing?
Batgirl (Cassandra):
Batgirl: I don't.
Gothamite, terrified: Oh okay–
---
Batman: Shouldn't you be at home?
Gothamite, who's also a teenager very much snicking out at four am: Shouldn't you mind you business?
Batman:
After being forcefully driven to home on the batmobile
Gothamite That was really unecessary–
---
Gothamite: Are you alone??? Where'd your dad? Where's Batman?
Robin (Tim Drake, early days): Batman's not my dad.
Gothamite:
Gothamite: See now I'm concerned.
Robin: Oh no–
Gothamite: What's is this a internship...? A job...?
Robin: You know what? Yeah, Pretty much.
Gothamite: Really? Oh okay, okay. I'm less concerned– Because–
Robin: Yeah I can see–
Gothamite: Like "is he kidnaping those children"?
Robin, chuckling: No, no–
Gothamite: You get paid?
Robin: Not really.
Gothamite: I'm back at being concerned–
---
Gothamite, from her window: Have you eaten yet?
Robin (Dick): No– (lying)
Gothamite: Oh, the poor child– Oh shame on you
Batman:
Gothamite: The poor kid– You're dragging him alone with you to fight crime on a empty stomach?
Batman:
Batman: I–
Gothamite: Unbelievable. I expected more on you– Hold on sweety I'll see If I have some cookies here to give you.
Dick: :)
---
Robin (Damian): Do I look like a fucking child?
Gothamite: Do you want me to answer that?
---
Old Gothamite being around the city since Batman year 1: You sound different.
Batman (Dick Grayson): No I don't.
Gothamite: Yes you do–
---
Gothamite: She looks different.
Gothamite: Mark is the same girl.
Gothamite: No honey, she looks different, she's was taller
Gothamite: Honey you're being paranoid.
Gothamite: She was a red-head!
Gothamite: Oh, Mark. Now the girl can't even dye her hair? Just because she's a Super-hero? Por girl can't even reinvent herself and people on this city start saying she's a different person?! Let her be! Her life must've be hard enough–
Gothamite: Jennet I swear to God that's not the same girl–
Batgirl (Stephanie), just trying to get some information:
Gothamite: You never notice when I change my hair–
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they were right to give him those eyes
Jim Gordon is the bicycle of Gotham i swear you can ship him with nearly everyone
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sorry I just saw a post that said Gotham Jim Gordon is bisexual. No he's just the most repressed gay man in the world. how do you have the head-touching scene with Bullock....but spend all your time at home being like "sorry hot wife who loves me I can't have sex or even just stay here and hang out. I need to go do Police Work!!!!" okay. you like men it's okay .
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LGBTQ+ Gotham Headcanons
My gender, pronoun, and sexuality headcanons for Gotham characters.
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Harvey Bullock - Cisgender, He/Him, Gay.
The GCPD isn't an accepting or supportive place to work so he sleeps with women to protect himself. He's trying so hard to come off as straight. I mean, he and Scottie were engaged within less than a year of being together. I headcanon Fish as his beard. He wants to kiss Jim so badly.
Oswald Cobblepot - Transgender FTM, He/Him, Gay, and Asexual.
He would be offended and confused if you thought he was straight. Oswald is very open about his identity and will beat the shit out of you for misgendering him. He doesn't care about sex but is fine engaging in it if his partner (Ed) wants to. Gertrude was the most supportive person ever and always gave Oswald unconditional love. When he was younger all he really wanted was to be a boy when he grew up.
Jonathan Crane - Transgender FTM, He/They, Gay, Demromantic and Asexual.
He knew he was a boy from a very young age. Realised he didn't mind using they/them when he was a teenager and started to use both he/him and they/them. He thought he was gay early on because of his lack of interest in girls but started to question if he was aroace when he got older. They realised they were demiromantic when he grew a crush on his best friend at the time.
Harvey Dent - Cisgender, He/Him, Bisexual.
I think he has a preference for women but only slightly. Definitely uses his two-headed coin to flirt with people and it actually works more often than not. Knew he was bi from a young age.
Ecco - Cisgender, She/Her, Lesbian.
She and Jeremiah are in a queerplatonic relationship. She could get a girlfriend if she really wanted but isn't interested at the moment. The most dedicated girlfriend you could ever have. Falls hard. Had an 'oh fuck' moment in high school when she realised she was a lesbian.
Sofia Falcone - Cisgender, She/Her, Bisexual.
Strikes me as someone who isn't focused on romance or sex but could get a boyfriend or girlfriend if she put time and effort into it. I think she has a preference for women.
Lucius Fox - Cisgender, He/Him, Gay.
Acts cool but is probably a gay disaster on the inside. Tries to flirt and is semi-successful when he does. Says he's too busy with work to find a boyfriend and is slightly lonely. Doesn't try to hide his sexuality and has no problem telling people he's gay.
Victor Fries - Cisgender, He/Him, Bisexual.
Preference for men. He isn't that open about his sexuality but still acts surprised when no one knows he's bisexual. Is very casual about it. I see him as a very quiet and respectful person when showing his attraction to both men and women and just prefers keeping his feelings to himself.
Nora Fries - Cisgender, She/Her, Bisexual.
No real preference for either men or women. Would try and flirt with women but it would be seen as something platonic. She and Victor had matching pride shirts.
Tabitha Galavan - Cisgender, She/Her, Bisexual.
Preference for women. I like to think the first person she murdered was a homophobe. Could pull any man or woman she wanted and no one can convince me otherwise. She either just kills any person who is homophobic or transphobic in her presence or beats the shit out of them as Oswald does.
Butch Gilzean - Cisgender, He/Him, Straight
Raised with respect. The two most important women in his life, Fish and Tabitha, were bisexual so he is very much an ally. Type of guy to tell somebody off for making an offensive comment, verbally or physically. He, Tabitha and Barbara were in a polyamorous relationship.
Jim Gordon - Cisgender, He/Him, Bisexual.
Preference for women. Growing up he had some internalized homophobia but he overcame it as he got older. He falls for any pretty girl who ever so slightly flirts with him. I think he likes men who are either mean with a soft side or just a bit of a bastard(Harvey and Oswald). He and Harvey are both in love with each other but are just too stupid to admit it to one another.
Barbara Kean - Cisgender, She/Her, Bisexual.
Male preference. Had some internalized homophobia until she killed her parents and became free. Went to an all-girls school where she had a few girlfriends before getting in trouble for dating other women. Probably pegged Jim.
Kristen Kringle - Cisgender, She/Her, Omnisexual, Greyromantic.
Male preference. To me, she only showed sexual attraction towards her boyfriends before Ed, even then I think she and Ed would've been better off as friends. She very rarely experiences romantic attraction but when she does I think she'd be a little awkward about it. Kristen definitely pegged Ed. She and Lee would've been cute together. They're very dear to my heart.
Selina Kyle - Cisgender, She/Her, Bisexual, Demiromantic.
Female preference. She's had crushes on both Ivy and Bridgit. Acts like she's annoyed by her loved ones but would kill and die for them. She's protective and caring even if she denies it. Has only had romantic feelings for her friends. She has trouble admitting her romantic feelings for people. Barbara and Tabitha are her badass bi mentors.
Fish Mooney - Cisgender, She/Her, Bisexual.
No preference. Flirts with everyone. Doesn't tolerate anyone's homophobic bullshit. The biggest eyerolls. The greatest gaydar in all of Gotham city. One look at Oswald and Harvey and she knew they were both lonely little gay men. Harvey's beard.
Edward Nygma - Transgender FTM, Genderfluid, He/She/They, Bisexual.
Preference for women. The king of internalized homophobia. His whole arc in the show was him denying his bisexuality and feelings for Oswald. The Riddler is sick of Ed's compulsory heterosexuality. Hated his female body and started to transition during uni. Ed was comfortable having a male body but didn't understand why he was only sometimes comfortable being seen and referred to as a man. This led to him discovering that he was genderfluid as an adult. Never told anyone until Oswald and only become open about his gender identity after he and the Riddler became whole in s3. The worst at flirting but simultaneously the sweetest.
Alfred Pennyworth - Cisgender, He/Him, Straight
Does his best for Bruce. And I mean does. Biggest ally you'll ever meet. If anybody bullies his boy for who he is be prepared to be slapped the fuck out of. All he wants is for Bruce to be safe and happy and if Alfred has to teach somebody a lesson in respect, so be it.
Ivy Pepper - Cisgender, She/Her, Lesbian.
Disaster lesbian. Had a fat crush on Selina when she was younger, and still does though slightly less. Her feelings have pivoted more towards Bridgit. The original plant lesbian. Oswald is her disaster gay role model. Expert in the language of flowers and gives personalised bouquets to her crushes.
Bridgit Pike - Demigirl, She/They, Lesbian.
Oblivious to people's interest in her. She never really got the chance to explore any romantic interest they had with the women in her life before being burned due to her home life. She doesn't really know how to deal with romantic or sexual feelings. They never really fully felt like a girl and felt that there was something else to them. So the use of they/them and she/her pronouns felt natural to Bridgit.
Jervis Tetch - Cisgender, He/Him, Biromantic, Demisexual.
Male preference. Had a fucking heart attack when he had his first male crush. He had no idea what to do. Felt so guilty about it. He's just kinda pushed his bisexuality down. He started to accept his bisexuality as he got older and fully accepted himself by the time Alice died. I see him as someone who thinks sex is intimate and I think he'd only want to perform sexual acts with a partner who he'd found a real bond with. Thinks he is really romantic but his lack of romantic experience says otherwise.
Alice Tetch - Cisgender, She/Her, Lesbian.
I don't know why I think this, I just do. It's just the impression she gave me. She and Bridgit could've been arson girlfriends. Always knew she was gay just never got the chance to have a girlfriend.
Leslie Thompkins - Cisgender, She/Her, Pansexual.
Growing up, she didn't really understand why gender was a big deal to some people, if somebody was attractive they were attractive, why did it matter? At university, she discovered what the term pansexual meant and realised that it fit her perfectly. Has three types, dark and badass (Jim and Barbara), sweet and adorable (Kristen) or a mix of the two (Ed).
Valerie Vale - Cisgender, She/Her, Bisexual.
Male preference. Flirts with her sources all the time. She and Lee gave me some gay vibes honestly. Nothing is more romantic than teaching your boyfriend's ex how to lock pick when trying to escape from her own home and a crazy man in a tophat.
Jerome Valeska - Cisgender, He/Him, Bisexual.
Chaotic bisexual with no preference. Flirts with almost everybody. Used to bully Jeremiah for being gay (not severely just little comments) and then cried when he had his first male crush when he was little. He's perfectly happy and open with his sexuality now, he was just a homophobic little shit instead of a gay little shit when he was really small. Never been in a real romantic relationship before so he's useless when it comes to real romance.
Jeremiah Valeska - Cisgender, He/Him, Gay.
Disaster gay. Always knew he was gay. Used to watch male guests at the circus from behind the trailers. Jerome made fun of him for it until he had his gay panic and joined him. Can't flirt for shit but tries his best. Touch starved. Kinda lonely. As I've said before he and Ecco are in a queerplatonic relationship.
Bruce Wayne - Transgender FTM, He/Him, Bisexual
Preference for women. Started to transition at the start of s2. Felt wrong being in the body of a girl since he was very little. The only therapist he's been to is a gender therapist from outside of Gotham. He's just a little sweetheart. He does his best to impress his crushes. Overall, he's just doing his best to cope with his romantic feelings for people (Selina). I like the idea of Jim and Lucius being his older queer role models.
Victor Zsasz - Cisgender, He/Him, Pansexual.
He just doesn't care what somebody's gender is. If you're hot you're hot and he's going to flirt with you. Very blunt when admitting his sexual and physical attraction. Difficult to decipher if he's into you or if he wants to annoy the fuck out of you when it comes to his romantic pursuits. Breaks into his crush's houses and does shit like drink all their milk. Clingy.
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What do you think of my headcanons, do you agree or disagree? Let me know! :)
I apologize for any mistakes, I'm dyslexic so proofreading is difficult.
#this person this person gets it#its like you dug into my brain and pulled out my headcanons op#op be magic#gotham#headcanon
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Jim Gordon enjoys being pegged.
#i'm so sorry to everyone whos feed this pops up on#(im not but it feels polite to say it is)#gotham#jim gordon
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Jim Gordon is the bicycle of Gotham i swear you can ship him with nearly everyone
#i headcanon him as bisexual#and you know what im right#i always am#jim gordon#gotham jim gordon#gotham#gotham tv#gotham fox#dc#dc universe#jim x lee#gobblepot#jim x harvey#bullock#jim x barbara#jim x ed nygma#jim x lucius fox#i could go on
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Penguin: *gaslights, manipulates, mansplains*
Awww look at mama's little winner go
#just a funny little guy#doing funny little guy things#hes just a little guy#penguin#gotham penguin#oswald copplepot#gotham#gotham fox#dc#dc universe
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good morning i say even though it’s nearly five pm ladies and gentlethem, today i bring you…
✨Damian Wayne’s quirks with physical affection✨
(sorted by how he reacts with each family member)
Bruce: Damian looks up to his father a lot, but they clash because they’re too alike so they’re not overly affectionate. Still, whenever they’re not being jerks to each other he will accept hugs or a kiss in the top of the head.
Alfred: they both keep a very ‘formal’ and polite relationship. People normally assume Damian doesn’t show affection to him but the trick is that he does it when nobody else is watching. That’s his grandfather, ofc he’ll hug him anytime he wants.
Dick: Now, the thing with Dick is that Damian has given up on stopping him, so even though he rarely hugs back, he will no longer try to stab Dick when he grabs him without warning, he just sort of hangs from his arms like a pissed little kitten. He will only hug back if he’s in a particularly good mood, or if he notices Dick is sad. (Dick has also, somehow, managed to smooch his cheeks a couple of times).
Tim: physical touch between these two is throwing hands. Sure, Damian doesn’t really like being touched too much and he certainly dislikes Tim the most, but I personally think he keeps his distance because he knows Tim doesn’t like him.
Duke: Damian certainly tolerates him the most out of all his brothers, but they’re not the type to hug or anything. They do have a secret handshake though, and Duke helps him get to the higher shelves by getting on his shoulders. (And by secret I mean secret. It’s important nobody else knows Damian does something of the sort).
Cass: Cass is the one person in the house who has always been able to go up to Damian, hug him, and be hugged in return. Like seriously, always.
Steph: She’s never really dared hug Damian, but he’s never denied her a fist-bump or a high-five.
Jason: ok I left the best for last. Now, everyone immediately assumed they would get along like a house on fire and to an extent, it’s true. BUT!! As much as Jason is purposefully annoying and always stirring drama around the house, Damian rarely gets truly mad, for everyone’s confusion. He’s at most, mildly fussy when Jason ruffles his hair or picks him up like a sack of potatoes. And then, it happens: maybe one day something really exhausting happens, maybe one day Damian’s having a really bad day because of Talia-related drama, and not even Dick has been spared from his pissy behaviour. Enter Jason: he picks him up, and Damian… lets him. No fuss, no protest, just hugs Jason’s neck and that’s that.
(And yes, no matter how much Dick whines and cries, Jason’s the only person in the house -or maybe the entire world- allowed to carry Damian on his hip)
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actually though. various (sfw) kryptonian biology headcanons that skirt right up to human-passing
- higher base body temperature
- pupils that aren’t black but instead shaded slightly in the color of the iris. all kryptonians have unnaturally vivid eyes but it’s hard to tell exactly why unless you’re literally gazing into them
- tapetum lucidum (reflective eyes like animals) a bit harder to get away with, but are extremely funny because clark often does the maneuver where he’ll stand in front of a car to stop it, and this would make seeing him like seeing a deer but 10000000% worse
- they are actually bioluminescent it’s just that under normal circumstances it’s in the ultraviolet and we can’t see it. clark goes off to a blue sun mission and comes back looking halfway to electric blue superman. glowing stripes and freckles
- non-newtonian dynamic to their skin/flesh where it gets harder with more force applied; nothing unusual to the feeling of a normal handshake, but a punch thrown with force will break bone
- retractable fangs au because bonus teef are fun
- i swear some comic somewhere said something about nose gills
- solar lymphatic system primarily distributed along the spine. the entire spine lighting up with heat vision…
- they can collapse/skrunkle their spine a few inches; helpful with secret identity, but it restricts range of motion so it has the side benefit of making them a little clumsier
- blood tinged gold with stored solar energy
- just enough extra twist in their neck to enter uncanny valley territory - not quite looking straight behind but enough to be creepy as hell. kara would do this all the time
- golden age face squooshing. i do not think this should come back but it was actual canon for a while that they could just contort their faces. again creepy as fuck
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Due to the traffic light colours of Robin's suit, Jason, Tim and Steph once stole a Stop sign and super glued it to Damien's sword
He still has yet to forgive them and awaits his time for revenge
#he still went on patrol and the criminals of gotham were happy to be hit in the face with a sign than lose limbs#jason tim and steph broke one of the family rules for it see Rule 23: No Pranks or Prank Wars#batman#batfam#dc#jason todd#tim drake#damian wayne#stephanie brown#robin#red hood#red robin#spoiler#dc spoiler#batgirl#gotham#dc comics#dc universe#batfamily
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