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#you’ll get through it
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I've been diagnosed with pcos since i was fourteen. pcos symptoms ruined me in a way, as I had the luck to catch most of its symptoms. I had always envied my friends. they gets to live their teenage life pretty. they gets to have beautiful long hair. they gets to not be overweight and not get stretch marks as they lose weight. but I guess not everyone has everything.
your blog makes me feel less alone. it assures me that there are others living with the same pain as me. I want to thank you for creating this blog. thank you so much ❤️
You’re absolutely not alone! Many people have the same experience. I remember putting on stretch mark cream as a middle schooler. It’s a hard experience for sure. Treatment can make it better, but remember, you are more than your looks! Who you choose to be is way more important than how you look. (Or how you think you look. I’m sure you’re beautiful inside and out!)
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orfille · 10 months
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Soo sad, soo unhappy
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trvlytylar · 11 months
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makaelachanese · 1 year
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findinglifeinwords · 1 year
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Why is it the sweetest rewards only song to us on the other side of hardship.
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inklore · 2 years
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this is your daily reminder to write that fic! who cares if it’s a dying fandom, bring it back to life! who cares if you only have a sentence, you’ll get there don’t give up! who cares if it’s a self indulgent fic, we love to see it! who cares if it’s an overdone trope, you’re making it unique in your writing style! who cares if it takes you a month to write a fic and then you dip, you’re still writing and sharing your work and that’s what matters! who cares if you write for yourself and never post it, you’re still writing and getting your ideas down and that matters just as much as if you posted it! just keep writing, you got this <3
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paper-lilypie · 1 year
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we’ll get em next time
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otaku553 · 2 months
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Procrastination doodles of sabo for the king sabo au :)
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he’s THE guy ever
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dias-writing-corner · 8 months
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I keep thinking abt yandere ticci Toby that started off as childhood friends.
You meet him through his sister as the 2 of you were good friends long before you meet her brother. And sure you’ve heard Lyra mention how her brother is being bullied and about his  Tourette’s through the school grapevine but you’ve never actually met the kid or even really seen him outside of pics or from afar.
Anyways when you meet him he’s this shy and awkward kid who’s a year or so under you and Lyra. But you don’t judge him for his Tourette’s or anything, you’ve always been a kind person like that. As you hang out with the two of them he starts getting this silly little puppy crush on you and Lyra teases both of you - separately - about it. But you blow her off as you just see him as a little brother.
Soon Lyra gets into her accident and dies. Leaving a hole in both yours and Toby’s lives and hearts. You spend more time with each other trying to remember her, you bring him homework he missed from staying home after her death and start to notice he’s more erratic with his behavior. Prone to outbursts or even aggressive behavior towards you. You can’t stand his self harm - even if he doesn’t feel what he’s doing to his hands - and he snaps at you when you press the issue too much. After you leave each time he lashes out at you Toby feels bad and beats himself up, after all he’s lost his sister, he doesn’t want to lose you as well.
But he eventually becomes so overcome with grief and anger he goes through with the murder of his step dad and burning the house down. And Slenderman wipes his memory of everything before his moment of retribution.
You notice the flames on your way to give him the latest bit of homework. Pressing harder on the gas until you stop your car in front of the building house, leaving the car you run up to the caution tape set up by police and the fire department. Falling to your knees in grief as you sob and scream his name, one arm covering your face as the other holds onto your opposite shoulder in a desperate attempt to comfort yourself.
~~~
Years have passed yet you still hold onto the 2 Polaroids of your dearly departed friends. One was yours originally, the second was Lyra’s and the third that was Toby’s was assumed to have burned in the fire. The Polaroids were of a day you all went out and got ice cream and had fun like kids, one of the last times that happened before Lyra’s death.
Anyways you’d be well into college, perhaps junior or senior year? Focusing on studies has been hard for the past few months due to feeling like you’re being watched constantly. And quite honestly it’s starting to affect your grades. So you go out to the woods, to a part where the hiking path leads to a small clearing with one or two picnic tables. Settling down at one with your books and notes you try to let the sounds of the woods envelope you in peace and quiet to focus. Only for it to get a little too quiet and set off that feeling of being watched once more.
After a while you realize you’re not going to get much of anything done like this. You try to leave but as you get to the start of the path that leads home you find yourself stuck to a tree. Back digging into the harsh bark of the tree, a strange man with orange tinted goggles over the eyes and a strange mask covering the lower part of the face. You can hear the man breathe heavy, only one arm of his presses into you and holds you still.
Something in you tells you to keep quiet, an almost primal urge to make yourself as small as possible. You try to shrink into the tree behind you. Noticing the 2 deadly weapons fastened onto his hips, a small whimper escapes you as tears form in your eyes. He reaches down into his pocket and brings out a folded piece of film, unfolding it and showing you it. It’s crumpled around the edges and worn but you can still make out the smiling faces of a young Lyra Toby and you.
“H-how do you have that? It should’ve burned…” you ask in astonishment as tears threaten to fall from your eyes at the memories of your deceased friends.
The man’s neck twitches so hard you worry it’d snap, he doesn’t say anything and just points at young you in the picture. You nod your head and say “ye-yes that’s me..” assuming that’s what the man was asking. Using his free hand he tugs the goggles off his face and lets them rest in the messy brown hair atop his head.
Eyes crinkled in a sort of joy or maybe excitement as he finally speaks up. “F-f-found yo-ou”
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mangodoodles000 · 10 days
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Love how GuapoDuo and HideDuo enjoyers are experiencing their first famine which has been going on for about 2 months at least (and they are not taking it well)
Meanwhile DeathDuo enjoyers who have been starved of content for months are finally getting fed well these past few days
Love the switcharoo we accidentally have
Now u know our pain >:)
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archersartcorner · 2 months
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Back in Far Harbor gang… I get they probably didn’t want to extend a cutscene where the player had no control out too long, but I do wish in the Acadia meeting that you can eavesdrop on they brought up Nick 😭 but they do Not so here’s me making up scenarios. The Usual. 😏
#my art#described#fallout 4#dima#fallout 4 dima#nick valentine#also like the idea that Nick & Dima have internal fans and when they get Super Emotional u just hear WRRRRRRRRRRRRRR WHDBDJ#also playing with the idea that po is a psyker/has a ‘sight’ equivalent that’s. essentially just in-game save-scumming LMAO#rly hoping that’s not an idea I’m accidentally stealing from someone. PLS lemme know if someone else has used that and I just Forgot 😭#but ye essentially when faced with the more decisive moments. Po might just pass out and ‘experience’ all of the options -#- (akin to garnets future vision in SU I’d say!) and that helps him determine the best path forward#thought sometimes when it’s a smaller decision he doesn’t pass out. just experiences some light fatigue and then -#- ‘oh ya btw that trunk is trapped. yea you’ll get blowed up if you just open it.’ ‘…. well thanks for relaying that .0001 seconds before-#-I opened it PO.’#but anyway. all that to say that’s what Nick’s referring to when he said po probably ‘saw’ it and then encouraged the path#po meanwhile is upstairs looking through faraday’s diary - I mean uhhhhhhhhhh the other secret stuff. def not his diary#anyway. DiMA’s not biological but there is an importance to him to him and Nick’s relationship. he’s stupid protective of Nick -#- who probably doesn’t appreciate being the ‘little’ brother all that much. but that’s just how DiMA’s rationalized their ‘roles’#I just like em hehe
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doubleaabat · 3 months
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Peace dude found a sad old paper in his van and decided to fill it out
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m1d-45 · 1 year
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i gobbled and devoured the post imposter things. scrumptious!! but what if poor little xiao man feels guilty for hunting or scarring us in the hunt? and please don’t feel obligated to answer, i know you’re busy
burden to bear
word count: 2.7k
-> warnings: spoilers for liyue archon quest, canon typical violence…. minor body horror? blood mention.
-> gn reader (you/yours)
taglist: @samarill || @thenyxsky || @valeriele3 || @shizunxie || @boba-is-a-soup || @yum1x || @esthelily || @turningfrogsgay
< masterlist >
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during the hunt itself, xiao is driven by a need to prove himself, pushing past his instinct and the way his karma flares around the one on the throne. he sees it as a way to redeem himself, to finally scrape some of the sin off his hands. it’s a way to prove himself, and one he takes eagerly.
it’s not correct to say he’s blinded by faith, but it’s not exactly wrong either. he definitely feels, subconsciously, that something’s… off, maybe, about his god. perhaps it’s the way his vision always seems to flutter and flare, or the ice in his veins when the command to hunt is given. he feels uneasy, unsettled, finding himself rolling his shoulders and wondering if he needed to add more stretches into his routines. and yet, despite the tension in his shoulders and the twist in his stomach, he kneels, bowing his head with a swear of fealty that goes unanswered.
unacknowledged.
perhaps he had delivered it wrong?
he doesn’t think much of it, quickly dissolving from the throne room and appearing besides the statue of the seven on the west edge of liyue. looking out over jueyun karst, he knows it’s a bit fruitless to start his search there due to the vicinity to the other adepti, but the spires there are tall, filled with wiry bushes and crags of rock that are easier to hide in than may seem at first glance.
he draws his pole arm, spinning it once over his hand before tapping the end to the stone beneath him. he’s not sure why he’s so nervous—is it the fact that this is technically the first order he’s been given? is it the idea of slaughtering somebody so identical to his creator that it nearly fooled morax, who’s been alive longer than he could fathom?
or is it simply the prospect of failure?
xiao grits his teeth and steps off the edge of the floating stone, halting his fall with anemo at nearly the last possible moment.
his feelings meant nothing. orders were given, and he had to follow them.
why else was he there, if he couldn’t?
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it takes him longer than he expected to find you. he’s almost impressed, really, that you managed to evade his searching eyes, that you dodged not only him but the other adepti as well, all without taking refuge in any villages or otherwise civilized areas due to the orders the millelith put out. you hid well, he could attest to that, and though he was the one to find you, it was only on accident.
he was clearing out a group of hilichurls north of the inn. he was surprised so many had settled so close to the statue of the seven, as hilichurls usually avoided concentrated elemental energy, but didn’t think too hard about it. he simply unhooked his mask from his belt, noticing the difference in strength between these hilichurls and the average, and teleported into the middle of the camp.
the first thing he heard was a spotter’s cry. the second was the mitachurls’—archons, there were three—roar as they hefted their weapons. the final one was the intricate chanting of the abyss, but not any incantation he recognized.
he kept himself half in smoke as he danced around the edge of the camp, taking out the archers while he tried to find the abyss mage. he could catch glimpses of hydro bubbles through the walls of the hut, but the steps were covered in frost-
he barely ducked under the swing of a mitachurl’s axe, slashing his spear along its side as he slipped away, darting across the path of one charging with a large stone shield. it clipped his shoulder despite his efforts, pain spiking down his arm, but he didn’t pay attention to the injurh. normally he wouldn’t be this distracted, but two abyss mages and three mitachurls in one camp could only spell bad news. the best he could likely do was to leave and grab back-up, but who? the millelith were busy, morax and the adepti were on their own search…
xiao quickly climbed onto the roof of the hut, jamming his spear between two of the logs to keep grip on the woven roofing. the grass was damp, squishing uber this feet, likely from whatever hydro magic the mage was busy with within it. it likely wasn’t the smartest idea to stand on the roof, but this area of liyue was mostly plains, with little cover from the charging mitachurls. he needed a moment, if only a short one, to hash out a plan to deal with the camp.
the three mitachurls were standing besides the hut, two with shields and one with a crackling axe, electro dancing along the blade. xiao shifted, pivoting around the peak of the hut to move away from that one, the grass roof squishing below his feet.
the mitachurl’s ear twitched.
he shoved himself off the roof just as the mitachurl slammed the flat of its blade onto the roof, the whole shack shaking. electricity swarmed across the waterlogged roofing, reaching the opposite edge just as xiao dropped off it, landing between the other two mitachurls. they didn’t charge, nor attack, their motivations only made clear when the hiss of cryo froze out the lingering moisture in the air in front of him, effectively boxing him in.
the abyss mage swayed in its circle, staff glowing a sharp blue from within its bubble of frost.
“leave, adeptus,” it hissed, waving its staff in a circle. “you have no place here.”
xiao didn’t reply, instead picking apart his options. he couldn’t do significant damage to the shield mitachurls without utilizing his burst to destroy their shields, but that didn’t cover the mage at all… and he was still wet from the roof, so the mage would be able to freeze him within the time he had drawn in enough anemo energy to wield his mask with any level of efficiency…
he flexed his hand around his polearm. how had he gotten into this situation? his only options were to get lucky or teleport away, but even the latter of those relied on the first.
luck. how useless was he, to rely on luck-?
“‘adeptus’?”
the abyss mage startled at the voice, the cryo it had been swirling dissipating. both he and it turned to the side, to the entrance to the hut, where a figure could be seen just beyond the mitachurl.
his first instinct was that it was his god, and he briefly relaxed under the knowledge that he’d get out of this in mostly one piece.
his second was to recognize the torn clothing and dirt-smeared skin, and realize that you could never be his god.
xiao’s eyes narrowed, his spear twisting towards you faster than the distracted mage could react. you, his target, the one he had been seeking out, were hiding behind the abyss. he should have expected it, in truth, figured out the one known for going against the rules of nature would side with the most unnatural force, but that was not for now.
not now, when he was launched forward by the power of anemo, his spear driving him forward, barely skimming the mitachurl in favor of his true target: you.
your eyes barely had the chance to dart in his direction.
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xiao was, in truth, not the first one to see you.
many villagers had glimpsed you running around the outskirts of their villages, plucking apples and sunsettias off trees and taking mint from their gardens and leaving bundles of sweet flowers behind instead. they’d seen you, face half-covered in a poor mask made of scraps, your clothes that of the haphazard stitches of the hilichurls, which helped you blend into teyvat a bit more at the price of comfort. many had seen you and assumed you were a run of the mill thief, perhaps one taking advantage of the current hunt since the millelith were occupied. they wryly called you clever, warning the traveling merchants about you, the one they glimpsed at inane hours of night.
he wasn’t the first to see you, by far. he was, however, the first to recognize you.
he was the first to lay eyes upon your form and realize the truth, to realize that the blood seeping into your clothes was the color of stars and galaxies, to recognize that your heart beat blue.
the argument could be made that the hilichurls were the first, or perhaps the mages that had taken you in and brought you food, but it was not them that gathered you into their arms and whisked you away in a flash of teal, uncaring of the spike of cryo that drove into their side at the last minute. the hilichurls did not walk with frosted-over limbs, the abyss did not cry with a throat full of ice, calling for assistance in undoing their own crime.
xiao couldn’t decide whether it was lucky or not that baizhu was in the pharmacy, speaking with herbalist gui over the front desk. on one hand, it was best to have the most experienced healer in liyue at your side, but on the other..
“adeptus xiao, what is-…..”
confusion, then anger, then realization, all flashing over his face in an instant before he tilted his head and walked quickly to a back room, xiao following.
he busied himself with picking the ice off his body and clothes, ignoring the shake of his hands and the stench of blood in the room. the mage had pulled you from the point of his spear, but he still hit the side of your stomach, and he could tell it was messy.
knocks sounded at the door but baizhu turned them away sharply, only allowing qiqi to pass him a bowl of lotus seeds. he was focused, changsheng slithering off his shoulders to grab supplies as needed. time seemed to slow to a crawl, like xiao had entered a domain without an exit, filled with the iron smell of blood and the never ending chips of ice he peeled from his skin. it left behind stinging wounds and red marks, but he couldn’t find it in him to care.
what was his brief moment of injury compared to a scar upon his god?
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the moment that baizhu had stopped, all but collapsing into a chair and wiping off his hands with a tired call of ‘it’s done. the foundation will be okay.’ xiao had stood and left, biting his tongue through the protests of both his own body and the doctor.
he’d given changsheng his confession, but he did not wish to stick around and hear his verdict.
weeks later, morax came and visited him at the inn, carrying with him a plate of almond tofu and an apology. xiao leaned against the furthest edge of the balcony, curled around the plate, staying as far as he could from the one with your aura imprinted upon him.
he felt it, when zhongli had first come up the stairs. the shock, then the warmth, the all-encompassing comfort that soothed the pain from the bruising on his shoulder. he felt it, and knew that he did not deserve it.
“it’s not your fault,” zhongli insisted, baritone words colored with unreturned sympathy. “the fake… had fooled us all. even me. i cannot hold your actions against you when i myself would have done the same.”
and maybe that was true. maybe he would have drawn his own weapon, pierced your skin himself, acting on the orders of one who dared to take the place of the divine, but that was irrelevant.
xiao was the one who had hurt you. and it was entirely his fault.
almond tofu, his favorite dish, tasted bitter and sour on his tongue, almost akin to the pain medication that zhongli had made him drink after noticing how cautious he was with his injured arm. he’d made him take the first dose in front of him and swear to take the rest, with a long monologue about taking care of himself tacked on afterwards, but it was for nothing. aside from the first night he had it, xiao hadn’t touched the bottle. it sat on his nightstand, beside a bed he hardly used, taunting him when he returned earlier than usual.
he could take it. there was nothing stopping him from doing so, and he probably should if he wanted to return to his duties quicker. but every time he picked up the glass, thumb tracing over the engravings as he undid the top, he hesitated.
he could take it. he probably should. but did he deserve to?
you were still recovering, possibly still bedridden weeks later. your blood still stained his spear, dripping down to his palms, pale and scarred skin marked further with the blue and purple swirls of his sin. you were still in pain, still healing from a spear to your side, and he was here, reaching for medicine for a sore shoulder?
(it was worse than that. bone had knocked against bone, bruising beneath where muscle could reach. it ached even when he sat as still as possible, dragging him out of every attempt to meditate. the dark purple splotches stretched beyond his clothing, reaching across his back and up his neck, making nearly any action flare the wound. it was far beyond an over-exerted muscle or a particularly tiring day, and yet even the worst nights of his pain were staved off by the memory of having to wash blue off his blade. even as the latch on the bottle was undone, the lip pressed to his, he could never bring himself to drink it)
(even the small droplet of it on the rim, tasting of qingxin extract and violet grass, threatened to make him sick. how dare he?)
yes, it would likely only get him into more trouble were he found out, but he was careful not to be. whenever the wind brought him the heavy presence of geo, zhongli’s familiar footsteps climbing the stairs, he snatched the bottle and emptied it into the stone carving on the balcony, letting the medicine soak into the soil beneath it. it splashed when he was sloppy, the deep purple medicine appearing blue on the stone, sparking a memory that weighed harder on the pit in his stomach.
even as he handed the bottle over to zhongli, his jaw clenched from the strain on his shoulder. the action was stiff, jerky, but evidently smooth enough that it had passed his assessment.
zhongli tucked the bottle away, surprisingly not drawing out a new one.
“i am proud of you, and of the progress you have made,” he said, golden eyes softening in the light of dusk. “well done, xiao.”
how strange, he thought, watching him leave, that the very action that made his vision swim with unshed tears was one that was praised.
he wouldn’t complain, of course. he never would. this pain was his to bear, just as the burden of your bloodshed was his to shoulder. he was well aware his pain could never take back yours—though he wished, desperately, that he could move your injury to him. he wanted to be able to take on the physical reminder of his defect, to take the hit of his own spear to spare you from his lapse in judgement. he would take it, take ten times the pain you endured, if only it meant that your skin was free of his scars.
it would be an honor to assist the divine, even at the price of his own life.
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sangrientamano · 2 years
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