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am-i-the-asshole-official · 2 months

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Aita for not making any of my characters, that I have to crank out daily, pansexual/polysexual/omnisexual specifically and only making them bi?

🏳️‍🌈👶🏼 so i can recognize this later lmao also I'm not panphobic or anything, this isn't about the validity of the label, pan is fine.

So i (20snb bi) have a project I'm working on where I take all the characters from a specifc media I'm into and pair them up with each other to make every possible ship kid from every possible ship(excluding characters who are kids themselves or are related or something, that shit is gross). Basically taking every character and pairing them up with another and creating a kid I think they'd have. Its a big project with lots of characters and I'm easily over 400 at this point. I really enjoy this, even if I'm not even 25% complete.

However I set a schedule for myself that at least one ship kid needs to come out each day which, considering I draw them, color them and give them some development and some even have siblings, (The refs themselves easily take me an hour to an hour and a half) I have to make lots of them quickly to keep up with my daily grind. I've been doing this project for over a year and although it's stressful, I can get them out quickly with breaks for myself.

Their character sheets all have some pretty basic info like their name, gender, pronouns, personality and more but it also includes their sexuality/orientation. I have a pretty basic list of options for what their sexuality will be: straight, lesbian, gay, Enbian, bi, Aro, ace and aroace with a few random things like polyam, WLW and a good amount of the something-loving-something/juvelic terms. I did this because, well, there's not many entirely unique orientations outside of them and although I love mogai/xenogenders and complex identities, I dont want to potentially drag up discourse or bring problems to my budding art blog over it. Its just not worth it to me to turn something I really care about on its head, even if I like microlabels.

In this case, I'm using bi as an umbrella term as most of the other terms share the same definition with slight variations in wording or action but not much difference in practice. We all like everyone, it's basic stuff. However, apparently this is a problem.

I've gotten one or two anons asking me questions about my guides asking some kind stuff like is this lesbian ship kid a butch or femme or Is this picture of them now or just at the age you put on the ref and other harmless stuff. Then things got rude with some Nbphobia but thrice now I've gotten asks:

1. Asking snarkily if im a panphobe

2. insulting me for not specifically writing pan or Omni and just writing bi.

3. Saying that I "clearly dont care about pansexual representation." Then brought up how my primary oc is native american so i clearly care about representation but that oc used to be a sona and I'm native?? Its confusing. (And Lowkey racist shit to just assume any native character is a "diversity quota" character instead of just a person existing but I digress-)

Im not pan, im bi so ig these people assume I'm not cool with pan people which isnt true? I have nothing aginest them, they are just pretty similar and I dont feel like it matters if they are specfically bi or pan or poly or any other label. I don't go into details like that for any other sub-group, not even pronouns and I included combinations and some common Neopronouns. I understand the importance of representation but my project has less than 50 people looking at it every day, Im not netflix or something. I'm one guy on the most LGBT blogging site with a big project and very little audience, I'm not showing people who wouldn't already know what pan is that pansexuality exists.

This project isn't that deep considering the characters in question aren't human/dont have human characteristics.(no it's not hazbin/helluva) Also ive never spoken about lgbt discourse or stated anything remotely close to it beyond the guides just passively having characters who are an LGBT identity. I've not even mentioned all the potentional orientations they could have so I'm not sure where/why this came up in the first place. The most politcial things ive said are calling out a creator in my fandom who outed themselves as a transphobe and mentioning im pro-palestine. That's it.

I mean this is pretty low stakes, I can just block these people and be done with it and this some seriously online shit but I just wanna check.

Am I being an asshole for just writing bi instead of specifying their mspec label because I have to produce characters quickly and I don't see enough of a difference to warrant a change/specification that would ultimately slow and clog an already stressful and complex project?

I dont think I am but idk lol

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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whathorselegs · 2 months

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This is probably going to be controversial take (I mean no harm by it, and its not hate directed at anyone), but the reason Dazai shooting at Akutagawa in Dark Era is so shocking to people is because he did it to a character we've had time to get attached to.

If Dazai had shot/killed/wounded a random subordinate for messing up his plans, it would be in all the PM!Dazai remixes as one of his dark and cool moments. Like when he's repeatedly shooting that guy in fifteen. It's messed up, but it doesn't happen to a character we're attached to, it happens to an enemy, so we swallow Dazai doing it much easier. If Akutagawa had been a random subordinate, people might even say Dazai was right to do it because that subordinate did a dumb thing that led their investigation to a dead end. (This is theoretical example not my opinion, I don't agree with what Dazai did)

I'm not justifying what Dazai did, but it's the framing that makes this so much more "evil" and unforgivable for people than anything else PM!Dazai did. It's stated multiple times Dazai was terrible to his enemies AND his own subordinates. Akutagawa wasn't the exception, he was just the one we care about. (Q too, though I see less talk about that and we're not actually shown what happened to Q)

Yes, it is cruel, no denying that, he hurts Akutagawa to teach him a lesson, that what's the mafia life has taught Dazai is effective. I'd argue though, it's not anymore cruel than what Yosano does to Tanizaki and Kunikida. She literally tortures them, but it's fine because it's played off as a joke and they're healed in the end. When in reality it's Yosano taking out her trauma on her patients and friends, and she's enjoying it. She didn't need her patients to be half dead in the flashbacks, that came after the trauma. She hurts them to discourage them from getting hurt again in the future. (Again, no hate intended, I love Yosano and all her complexities)

Dazai hurt Akutagawa the same way. Except it's never told as a joke. It happens brutally because it is and the show wants you to feel it in those moments. There is plenty brutal things that Dazai does that are played off as not serious. What he does to Ango with the airbag in his car is brutal. Yet its framed as a dark but necessary action, we're supposed to agree with Dazai because it ultimately saves Kyouka and Dazai gets to have some vengeance. It's a framed as a victory over Ango that we're supposed to support.

Chuuya is constantly being brutal in fights. He kills those people in the woods when he goes to retrieve Q and it's not a gentle killing either. He enjoys the fight, he's happy to get his hands dirty, he likes throwing bullets at people. And we accept this because he does it to the "bad guys".

Yet when Chuuya murdered the guards at Meursault, people thought this was out of character for him. It wasn't. These characters simply seemed more like innocent bystanders to the audience so the reality of how vicious Chuuya's actions were, kicked back in.

So many characters do messed up things in BSD, to pin one as irredeemable because of them doesn't make sense when so many characters are guilty of similar actions. People put Oda up on a pedestal just like Dazai does, because he stopped killing and took in some kids, but he was still a murderer, he still shot and maimed people with ease, as long as they were breathing he was fine with hurting them.

Sure, you can certainly say, "I no longer like this character because of their actions." and that's perfectly fine. You have no obligation to like a character, your preferences are perfectly valid. I just don't believe there's meant to be such a thing as irredeemable or truly evil in BSD. Just people who choose to keep hurting others, and those who try to be better than who they once were.

Dazai has hurt literal hundreds of people during his mafia years but that's off screen and to nameless background characters, it's easier to dismiss. The way he treats Akutagawa is a reminder to the audience that all the characters' actions have consequences. That Atsushi's hero was another person's nightmare and that BSD has many characters like this.

#bungou stray dogs #bsd dazai #bsd akutagawa #rambling #bsd #I'll say it again in the tags #no hate is intended here #this is not a post saying you have to like Dazai #I'm just writing out my thoughts about BSDs framing of actions

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justxtalking · 5 months

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my thoughts on this hxh ABCD mess

Being a Togashi fan is such a roller-coaster of emotions. I think I went through all the stages of grief in only one day.

Half of me believes he's trolling.

To be honest, it's better to just take it with a light heart. Togashi is known for joking around about himself, his health and his own story. (I wasn't in the fandom at that moment, but I wonder how everyone reacted when he said everyone was going to die). I consider ending D to be so uncharacteristically him for so many reasons I could talk for hours about it. I find it ironic how he gave a stereotypical-shonen-like ending when he talked several times (even in this interview) about how he likes to surprise himself (and his readers) when he writes. Some other times he explained he likes to play with these shonen stereotypes and just do something different. I mean, he's been doing it since the beginning of his career.

And I'll be honest, ending D sounds like a mockery of shounen.

(And I feel a bit dumb taking this so seriously if he's joking.)

(Though, this also may be the case of "the boy who cried wolf" and he's actually saying the truth this time.)

The other half of me thinks he's being honest.

If he is actually giving us a back-up ending, I find it incredibly sad. Not only because of his health, but also because he felt pressured enough to give us an ending, no matter its form and no matter if it's an ending he doesn't even consider anymore. He shouldn't have been on that position.

It is important to take into account that this is not an ending he wants or even considers anymore, it is an ending we can take if he's not able to finish HunterXHunter. We need to realize there's a lot of circumstances we don't know about or may not be considering for him to give us this ending as an option at that moment. And what type of ending too.

I seriously want for him to be able to finish Hunter X Hunter the way he truly wants, not worrying about anything else. He's thinking about three plausible scenarios that may see the light of day or not. And no matter what he ends up choosing, he should choose whatever he wants. It's his story, no ours. And it may even be his last story (I know it's sad, I want him to keep on writing forever, but it's true). Honestly, a part of me wants him to choose the A scenario because that's where seems to be less drama, but actually I want him to choose the C scenario. Even if that ending is Gon married to a lizard with beautiful lizard-babies in the Dark Continent. And that's because that ending is what he would actually want to do with the story.

(I really am curious about it, though. I know I wouldn't be able to guess even in a million years, but I'm still curious. And I so want to read the whole interview and see the whole episode, since there were more questions about other things.)

For the shippers

I know this feels like a punch in the gut or something even worst. I felt it too. And it's totally valid to feel like we do and not agreeing with ending D. Even as a non-shipper because what do you mean, Gon did what?

Everyone who follows me knows I'm a proud Killugon and Leopika shipper. And I will keep on being one even if Hunter X Hunter transforms into Boruto and I have to see Grandpa Gon (the more I say it, the more it sounds like a joke).

Honestly, I always considered the gay ships were never going to be explicitly canon.(Kishimoto traumatized me). Not because of lack of material, but because there's a whole context and a lot of external circumstances we sometimes forget about (and Kishimoto traumatized me). There was a reason why Togashi couldn't make his queer manga in the 90s, which, I'm sorry, I don't consider it to be that long ago. And there is a reason why he can't explicitly say that characters like Pouf or Hisoka are gay (despite being totally obvious and them being villains).

I still find it admirable how Togashi included so many queer elements in his stories and got away with it. And he's a mangaka that does shonen. And not just any shonen, a battle manga in Shonen Jump. (He included a trans man in Level E and made him transition. The way Togashi explains some things about this character may be a bit problematic, but Togashi still did this). And those queer elements are still there and are still as canon as when he wrote it the first time. Pouf is as gay as he is dramatic. And Ging and Pariston still have that sexual tension (and I'm 100% sure they fucked or they are going to fuck in the near future or both). And Killua is still the queerest boy I've seen in the longest time.

Sometimes, I think there's a possibility of Killugon being canon. But only because of Togashi's history and tastes. He may feel a bit rebellious and just go with it, he's so unpredictable that I'm always expecting anything and everything from him (I mean, he did what he did with Hisoka and Illumi and so many other things). However, he's an introvert, I'm not sure if he actually wants the attention he would get if he actually goes with it. And that is something we should also respect. (I do think the most plausible option is Killugon to be as ambiguous as they are now.)

In relation to ending D, I don't think we should worry that much. At the end of the day, it is an ending he doesn't consider anymore. (At least we can sleep well knowing that the ending he wants to do doesn't have to do with Grandpa Gon). What's important is what he writes and does in the manga. That is what speaks louder than anything.

Though, I do think it's going to be a pain in the ass interacting with other fans. I'm not looking forward to it. (At least they are going to stop saying that Kurapika will die, I hope!). What I'm looking forward to is the new Killugon content in the fandom.

My personal take

Gon =/= Ging. I could say a lot about this, since one of the things I love the most about Hunter X Hunter is what he did with these two and Gon's arc, but I think this is clear enough.

So!

After saying all of this, I think the only thing we should consider as canon is the manga. If he doesn't write it, it didn't happen.

If he's saying the truth, he may be thinking about how to finish Hunter X Hunter sooner or later. Even though so many fans say that they want an ending, I feel like we are not ready. Not even for Gon marrying a lizard and having beautiful lizard-babies in the Dark Continent.

I hope I was coherent enough. I have no answers, only thoughts and thoughts! I feel like we can only speculate and ending D is so confusing because how did we even get there?

I may be going through all the stages of grief again tomorrow, but I wanted to share my thoughts (at least partially). I may erase it if I feel too uncomfortable, but yeah!

Conclusion: Let's just take it with a light heart and wait to see what happens! (I know it's hard).

#i hope this post doesnt grow old badly lmao #togashi is the only one who actually knows what he wants to do by the end of the day #everything can happen #i find it sadly hilarious how i was traumatized by kishimoto found peace with togashi's work and then savage option D appears lmao #hxh #togashi #hunter x hunter #hunterxhunter #hxh manga #yoshihiro togashi #killugon #justxtalking #btw my mom read ending D and didnt like it either lmao #the dudebros can take ending d if they want it I'll just have my leopika wedding with killugon enganged ending

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let-us-cultivate-our-garden · 1 month

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I had a long argument with someone on whether or not stomping Belos before he dies was better than letting him die pathetically, and I asked myself if that is what fans really believe in... or if they would hail any Belos' death as the perfect one if Dana choose a different one?

They also justify the stomping as being part of horror-comedy genre and that Belos should not have any dignity what so ever because apparently letting him die in despair with no stomping is running the risk of making the audience feel "sorry" for him.

Honestly, these justifications make The Owl House feel more shallow. Like, why shouldn't the audience be allowed to feel sorry for Belos? What is the danger? That people would agree with Belos' views?

Or are we supposed to develop a black and white view of the world akin to a conservative view but inverted? And then hide behind the horror comedy genre to justify less drama? I hate to say it, but Nostalgia Critic is right about Belos being this strange outlier. The show seems to be afraid of actually doing a complex, tragic and yet irredeemable villain.

It doesn't make any sense to argue that Belos' death fits because of toh's genre as a horror comedy because the scene was neither played for horror nor laughs. At best, you have the image of Philip slowly being dissolved by the rain and then Raine's smug "that was satisfying" line. The overall tone of the scene is one of contempt as Philip tries one last plea to Luz only to be snuffed out (and weirdly validated) by the heroes. Its intent is to be cathartic for both audience (though as you know doubt know, YMMV) and the characters.

Frankly, despite its marketing, I don't see toh as either a horror or a comedy because it spends more time on slice of life stuff and high school teen drama and romance. And even when it does go for the horror and comedy, both are rather tepid. You want a real example of a horror-comedy for kids, then go watch Courage the Cowardly Dog or Invader Zim.

The reason why I argue the heroes validated Belos is because in the moment of his death, he clings to the idea that as humans, "we're better than this!" It's a moment of pathetic delusion that is appropriately met with silence but then it's ruined with Eda and Co. barging in with "Well, we ain't!" only to then prove his point by mercilessly stomping an already dying man to death. There's a reason why kid shows usually end with either the villain being imprisoned or not outright being murdered by the heroes. Evil has to die by its own hubris, not get killed by the heroes after the Big Battle when they're no longer a threat. I made a post about the importance of defeating a major antagonist twice.

Belos' death also doesn't work with a "Kill your oppressors" theme because the show isn't about that. The show barely spends any time showing why the EC is bad for the Boiling Isles and Eda is the only named wild witch we see getting harassed by them and even then, it's mostly played for laughs given how inept the coven scouts are (seriously, they're able to quit without fear of repercussions).

I think a reason fans are split on Belos' death is because of differing expectations; the fans who paid attention to Belos and the implication of his backstory and waited for every lie to come crashing down on him since that's what the show seemed to be building up to only to be unceremoniously ignored in the end were no doubt disappointed. Then you have the other fans who hated the character to the point that any gruesome death will do, regardless whether it made narrative or thematic sense or not.

Ultimately, I think the biggest reason his death doesn't work is because Belos fails as a villain.

Belos' status as a colonial puritan only works on a meta-level; it serves a cathartic release for marginialized people to see a representative of real world oppression beaten by queer characters as it fulfills the fantasy of finally overthrowing an oppressive system. The fatal flaw though is that none of this works on a narrative level because the coven system is either treated as a joke or simply a career path one must choose and we never see the disenfranchisement of wild witches. People largely get off scot-free opposing Belos, which undermines his credibility as both a dictator and a villain because no one cares about him until the plot needs them to. Luz doesn't even care about proving he's evil until Hollow Mind, which is halfway through season 2.

Belos as a villain only works if you project your own feelings and desires in wanting to see the Evil Christian/Evil Parent destroyed. While this is extremely satisfying emotionally, it does not make a sound story.

All the reasons why people like his death ("it's great the evil colonizer died so pathetically!" "omg, the white christian colonizer was killed by two queer people and their adopted son!" etc) are all meta reasons. And to be clear, it's totally fine if you thought his death was satisfying. But for many people, it did not work for a variety of reasons, including narrative ones. And that differing opinion should be respected instead of arguing some nonsense like "we have to make our villain as stupid/evil as possible or run the risk of people liking/sympathizing with him."

Belos should have died in a manner that connected back to his original sin: the murder of his brother. All of his lies and delusions and fear of being wrong should have played a part in the finale. He should have not died thinking he was right. He should have died realizing that all he did was for nothing. And that he is to blame. And that there is no one waiting for him back home.

#the owl house #toh critical #toh criticism #emperor belos #philip wittebane #long post #asks

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magicstormfrostfire · 5 months

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Something that confuses me a lot is some people's reactions/analysis to Sonic saving Shadow in the void in Sonic Prime.

Don't get me wrong, I LOVE it, and its parallels to what happened in SA2. That is incredible. But what confuses me is that a lot of people assume that in this show, SA2 happened and Sonic is losing Shadow again.

But I don't think that's the case...? I know it was said that the show follows modern games/everything is canon, but I dont think that means what some people think it means. I've seen some people criticize this interpretation of Sonic BECAUSE they think all of the games happened in this universe.

What I understood is that this is simply using the current ongoing personalities/traits/styles of the modern Sonic characters in games, but this is NOT the same universe. Its a different one. The direction they are going with the characters in Sonic Prime is writing them closer to their mainline game counterparts, just in a different universal setting. The universe is just not as drastic of a difference as say, Movie!Sonic or Sonic Boom's universe. (Which i think is why they made a point to say its following mainline Sonic; because Boom is a universe with its own games, Sonic, and canon as well.)

This is also why I think so many people judge Sonic Prime on what Sonic should know, how he should act, and what he should have learned from. But this is a different universe Sonic! He's a lot more naive and learning to get around. Its why I interpeted that Sonic catching Shadow was not ptsd of losing him again, it was fear of losing him period. This is very likely this Sonic's first world-saving scenario; he's use to just stopping Eggman's latest 'Robot of the week'. He is out of his depth with the shatterverse situation.

Now, I think its totally fair if this kind of 'new & naive' direction with Sonic's character turns people off, or if they dislike/hate it. This is not me trying to pursuade people into liking it if they don't. This is not me saying 'hey if you dislike this, its prolly because you're interpreting it wrong and if you see it this way you will like it.' But I constantly see people criticize the show for not taking into account things that happened in games. Or in this case, praising it for taking account events in the games. Those things didnt happen here! This is a different Sonic!

Of course, I could absolutely be wrong, and if I am, that's fine. But honestly it feels like they're making a different Sonic altogether, and frankly it wouldnt make sense for this to be the exact same Sonic.

So I guess my overall point is that I kind of feel like Prime is being saddled with game expectations it literally cannot meet, via being a different universe. Like I said, hate it, love it, idc I'm not your mom. I just think that this needs to be said and added to the conversation.

('Everything is canon' means 'every interpretation is valid'. Sonic has different universes, so its a lot more validating to fans to say everything happened, instead of alienating entire swathes of fans who all experienced Sonic differently through different media, by saying their experience isn't 'real' or 'true' anymore. And I think the more people realize this, the less people will argue 'evidence XYZ in game and this comic and the Japanese version of this podcast, and this game dev, and this episode, and this writer contradict your theory of Sonic hugging people' you do not need canon as gospel to validate why you like or dislike a certain take.)

Sonic in general is so fun because of how freeform and multiverse and endless it is. We haven't had that in a long time. There are things I love and things I hate, but not because of how closely they follow mainline. Its because I just like or hate it. We should cultivate this new growth and diversity, not prune it to fit into one shape. 🌱

#sonadow #sonic the hedgehog #shadow the hedeghog #sonic prime #sonic #sth #prime sonic #prime shadow #sonic analysis #shadonic #shasoni #I am begging people to use reading comprehension and do not bitch at me about things you THINK I said #I rarely put out my personal sonic thoughts for this very reason #but ive been sitting on this for a while and havent seen anyone address the whole #'Sonic has ptsd from what happened in SA2' narrative #and it had been bothering me for a while

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alexxncl · 13 days

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‼️NIGHTBRINGER LESSON 34 SPOILERS‼️

masterlist | all lessons | lesson 33 | lesson 35

i might be getting ahead of myself here, but are we lilith ?? like is that what's happening rn ??? he's not saying mc's name, and raphael doesn't day their name in the next scene...if so then that's actually really fucking sad 💀

it makes sense though, belphie not wanting mc to go into his head bc he's still clinging to the past and doesn't want to lose them forever like he lost his little sister forever, especially since human life is so finite compared to that of a demon or an angel or a reaper

also it's obvious by his choice of words that despite him looking older, belphie is very, very young in his mindscape, just like mammon was. i feel like this also shows how close mams and belphie are even if it's not shown much on screen in the game, or at least how much belphie takes after mammon's, if not all of his older brothers traits, for better or worse

well nvm...i still think my theory is valid though. belphie wants to go back to his old life and end up not losing lilith, but still have mc with him

i wonder how similar mammon and belphie's bond in the celestial realm is to their bond in the devildom. is belphie still as reluctant to ask for help and advice openly? is the banter still the same? are there less insults? how does the age gap here cause them to treat each other differently if at all? or the lack of angelic status?

oh i'm gonna cry

big brother mammon will always have my heart and i need more of him

we know belphie's love of stars and constellations and the night sky in general started when he was in the celestial realm, and seeing it manifest in mammon in his mindscape makes my heart happy, even if mammon isn't the reason he became interested in astronomy (was it michael? lucifer? idk i don't remember)

i also think it's very interesting how belphie's brain is actively working against him "wanting to hide from mc". he literally said "i don't want you to see the inside of my mind" and is hiding away from them. i think, in reality and in his mindscape, he's running from the fact that he has to face his feelings about the idea of mc leaving to go to the "human realm" and the possibility of losing them forever like he lost lilith

this was (obviously) not beel speaking, but his inner thoughts in the shape and voice of beel. circling back to belphie having the best and worst traits of his brothers, his insecurity and need for reassurance rivals levi's, and we don't get to see it as blatantly because he masks it way better than levi does

ok so we're here in the timeline...interesting. how much time passed between luci and dia's first meeting and the celestial war? how much time had passed between the celestial war and mc's initial arrival to the devildom? how much had belphie aged?

angels and demons age different than humans do, and belphie doesn't feel any older than like...10 or 11 at the most, but beel seems older than that. maybe its his mind warping things to make himself seem and feel younger, but maybe he really was that young. was lilith even born at this point? how old was belphie during the time of the war ?????

also i'm mad we didn't get to see michael bc i wanna know what he looks like but oh well 🧍🏾

oh baby :((((

i'm not the biggest belphie fan AT ALL, at least canon belphie, but i think it's necessary to acknowledge how his trauma severely affects the way he acts. he went from blaming himself, to blaming an entire race of people for his sister's death. he feels like he should've been the one to die, even if it meant leaving his twin without him

now, if he got a proper redemption arc after lesson 16, THEN we could talk. i think the devs fumbled his character in that regard, but my hcs about his redemption will have to suffice for now

he didn't want mc to see this dark part of himself because he hates that he still has this mindset, that he's trapped in a cycle of "what ifs" and wishing it were him instead of her, constantly ruminating and letting his anger and grief fester without ever dealing with it properly and letting himself heal. he not only thinks he doesn't deserve to heal, but that he doesn't deserve to live long enough to see himself heal, that he doesnt deserve to live at all

WHY ARE YOU BEING DIFFICULT????

i mean i knew this would happen since its only lesson 34 and there's still 6 more to go...but damn

i love and hate the fact that he's so smart. like, they could easily just ask barbatos to send them back to the human realm if it was that serious. he's clearly taken a liking to them. lucifer knows something's up, and he won't forge a pact with them until he gets to the bottom of whatever's going on

initially, i thought it was a spell to bring them back since he'd been the one facilitating the trips into the brothers' mindscapes this whole time, but this is wayyy more interesting

i feel like the barbatoses communicate across timelines, or that their lives intermingle with each others' somehow, so whatever they feel for one person in a specific timeline is felt for ever version of them in every timeline. we know barbatos, at the very least, knows that kayden is an important person in the grand scheme of things, whether it be because of the way diavolo feels about them or because they play a large part in the obey me version of a canon event

if it's more than base level importance, we can assume that there's a level of trust and love that barbatos feels for mc that stretches across time (callback to the login screen's dialogue)

maybe he gave us the piece of the grimoire for a reason outside of belphie's mindscape escapades. what if this is how we gain lucifer's trust? if a demon as powerful as barbatos can give mc a piece of his grimoire, then he should be able to make a pact with them, seeing as they're trustworthy enough to be in cahoots with THE time demon

anyways barbatos is nightbringer and you can't tell me otherwise. unless you think it's michael. then i might hear you out...i'm stuck between thinking either of them is the titular character simply because of the simultaneous lack and abundabce of emphasis on michael's importance

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devsgames · 5 months

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Playersexual

"Playersexual" is a term I only recently learned about and it's fascinating to me. For those who don't know, it usually means a character whose sexual orientation is basically open to whatever the player happens to be playing as. Trans? Yeah they're romancible. Man? Romancible. Woman? Sure, romancible. As long as you're the player they don't really care.

I think this term, combined with playing a lotta Baldur's Gate 3 and Starfield, sorta helped me come to terms with understanding why I often dislike really "open" romance systems where every character is Playersexual.

I'm a queer, bi/pansexual person, and that informs how I perceive interactions in and out of games. I totally understand the affirmation and liberation that comes with being able to romance whoever the heck you want. To some people, that's where the fun is at, and I get it. It's valid.

For me I just I feel weird when Playersexual is the orientation of characters in a game world that is also trying to get me emotionally invested. In my eyes, it tends to strip the perceived agency other characters might have; it makes them feel less like real people with wants, needs, attractions and preferences. They end up being more like a checklist or object to be interacted with until I choose all the right option and unlock the kiss or sex cutscene, or the mechanical bonus a relationship brings or whatever the case may be.

To me, characters that feel 'real' have sexual preference. Honestly I feel that if they lack that they sorta lack a fundamental element that informs them as a person and a character. Like, any queer person can tell you that when you're queer things are different. Interactions are different, how you act on the world is different, how you assess situations and the way you engage in conversations are different. Queer people interact with a predominantly straight world different than straight people do. Similarly, being a straight person in a world full of straight people affords interacting with the world fundamentally different than if you were queer. I think to say "every character is maybe queer" steamrolls this fact and sort of undermines that queer experience to an extent.

Plus I think its just like, a missed stroytelling opportunity! The straight dude turns my masc ass down because he's not interested in men? Oh hell yeah, if he's polite about it I think that's really cool! He feels like more of an actual person that way, and what might ordinarily be perceived as a 'failure to romance' feels like it could be spun into another step in our journey as friends together. Maybe we'll crack jokes about it later, or he'll have a change of heart once he gets to kmow me better. It might be awkward, but we had an experience together and set some friendly boundaries, and built an understanding. After all, people having boundaries are often what makes people people in the first place.

So when I play a character and a game tells me everyone in a game is queer, then I'm either lead to believe 1) my character is incredibly charismatic (trust me, that's not usually the case) 2) queerness doesnt exist as a concept in this universe (weird in its own way and also usually not true) 3) eh i dunno we didn't think about it too much just choose someone as a partner already (boooo!).

Look if everyone in my party has strong opinions about me pickpocketing someone and stealing 5 bucks from them, I'd expect them to have opinions about who they share a bedroll with >:(

#gamedev #game development #indie games #game dev #gamedevelopment #game design #indie dev #indiedev #thoughts #blog

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zvezdacito · 1 year

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// TWST Book 7 spoilers, thoughts of Malleus's writing as a character

So I was reading some other people's opinions on why some people consider Malleus overrated/annoying, and tbh this makes me really sad. The general consensus is that a lot of people fixate on certain sides and can only see him as one extreme or the other and it results in many ppl thinking a watered down version of his character is how he is in canon.

I feel that its such a shame because he's the most interesting, compelling and well-rounded take on his character archetype I've seen.

From my observation, usually they kinda make this archetype (the broody misunderstood 'everyone fears him like a monster except for one special person') someone you can't take that seriously, because of how his struggle usually kind of written in a way where everyone involved feel less like actual fully fledged original characters and really just one note tropes interacting with other one note tropes.

To elaborate: What i mean when i say this is usually ppl who hate him kind of just do because of plot requires them to and to show how all their haters are "normies" who can't get him because 'he's not like everyone else'. The misunderstood guy still usually has toxic personality issues but the story really tends to make it feel like they don't fear him for that but because they're shallow and have prejudice to ppl like him, so his personality issues are not framed as wrong or character flaws.

I don't think there's anything inherenrly wrong or mediocre with the "one special person who gives him a chance before anyone else" trope like I'm literally a Malleyuu enjoyer lol but like i said its all in the execution cause otherwise it fails to be compelling and believable. Usually in the poorly written version of this trope the guy doesn't undergo any character development other than showing more emotion and kindess to his partner because they melted his ice I guess so it really makes his whole character feel like its revolves around the sake of romance and fanservice.

Malleus doesn't fall into this trap in my opinion because his situation despite how fantastical it is, the way he was written makes it believable as to why everything is the way it is with him, and it also challenges the viewer if they would be able to say they wouldn't fear him too in that situation.

"We're gonna give you this character who everyone sees as a monster and show you deep down he just wants the same love as everyone else, making you contemplate changing judgement on him. He wants to prove this, but his way of going about it always inadvertently harms others."

"You know where hes coming from and if he had that social connection to give him a better understanding of others this wouldn't be happening, but its also equally understandable that the people hes trying to connect with don't deserve this and fear him even more after this, trapping him in a cycle of isolation."

"Given his track record, do you go about giving him a chance or just considering the repeatedly proven danger he brings. With the valid reasons of both parties, can you really say he isn't a monster and demand that 'if only people be near him'?"

There's just such a tragic and thought-provoking dilemma to his character that adds so many layers that makes him so good.

As omniscient viewers we have the benefit of seeing what he's going through form his POV so we can sympathize with him and understand that he thinks what he's doing is the best course of action and he's just trying to create a "win for everyone" situation.

But also everything he does ironically reaffirms everyone's fear and distrust of someone like him. No one can deny he has a tendency to cause further destruction when he tries to do something "good", examples including: past Briar Valley lantern lighting fire, the Halloween 2 ghost world party, and now his Sleeping Curse stunt in Book 7 Part 2 (they really emphasize this by making the spoken name of his UM basically mean "Malicious Fairy" but have its written name used to convey what its meant to mean be "Blessing").

↑ Given this, it honestly makes sense others, especially those who don't know him all that well, would just expect the worst when he's around already, and you wouldn't be able to blame them for that given the track record. It doesn't help that this impression is worsened since he tends to cause misunderstandings due to his lack of familiarity with human social cues.

Alongside the bias and preconceived notions from his status and reputation, they also make a point on how his personality flaws are still also a huge factor in pushing people away, such as not being able to see things through the perspective of others.

He also holds a subconcious belief due to what has been ingrained in him since childhood as a Draconia and the next in line that because he's superior to others at certain things, he has the right and responsibility to decide on what will protect and help them, disregarding the individual values/priorities of human beings and leading him to take reckless and destructive action with good intentions.

His upbringing, character strengths and character flaws are all realistically connected to each other and the way they are subtly shown to be ever-present in defining his decisions, goals and thoughts throughout the whole story. So we don't really need to have a character go out of their way to exposition this to us this word for word just so we can understand and believe it.

Moving onto something slightly more lighthearted, I really also like how dorky Malleus surprisingly was. Other similar characters in the archetype I usually see don't really have any hobbies, interests, or quirks outside of being a broody authority figure, which might've been appealing to some at first but it really just gets stale and boring after a while.

This should be the bare minimum in making a fleshed out and interesting character so maybe i sound like im giving them too much credit for pointing it out😭 But yeah compared to the other examples it's good that Malleus has his Tamagotchi and Gargoyle interests it makes him feel like a believable person who has his own life going on too (with the bonus that these interests are also metaphors for aspects of his character). The gap moe adds an endearing side to him, and makes the gap between his intent and impact of his actions even more tragic. It wouldn't hit the same without this side.

(^ Forgot how the exact quote goes, but it basically said dark stories are more effective when there are moments of genuine happiness and good in them, compared to if it was always just grim and edgy. The former increases the stakes and tragedy because you have something you to care about losing, while for the latter there is nothing for you to care about so nothing the story does really matters. Same logic applies to Malleus)

Overall, it's just like an unfortunate incompatibility of goals and circumstances, which is what TWST is all about. Another thing I want to say is out of all the characters, I feel like Malleus is the one who is the ultimate embodiment of TWST's main themes:

-> How it's not about "hero" vs "villain" just differing circumstances crossing paths and clashing because of how people on either side have their own complex perspective and dreams they want to realize

-> And how connection and finding community is important to find people who will help you make up for what you lack in reaching your goals and to better understand all the factors that caused the situation in the first place.

As if seeing yourself reflected in a mirror, the more you get to know the people around you, you realize in many ways you are actually quite alike, and through understanding others you could also possibly better understand certain aspects of yourself. It's sort of encouraging you to do the opposite of dehumanizing others and yourself, which is something Malleus has most evidently internalized.

So yeah this was so long😭 I had a lot I wanted to say since Malleus is my favorite TWST character. Idk if I missed anything or if i managed to express my thoughts in a cohesive way but yeah. I kinda go into a rage whenever I see the worst takes ever be put out about his character but tbh sometimes I can't completely blame others since fandom trends and the convenience of simplifying things into tropes can warp your perception of a character and what you associate with them.

Also sometimes twst doesn't do a good job with utilizing his character like Book 5 where he got turned into a deus ex machina and Halloween 2 where they killed any hype and intrigue for the plot we had at the beginning through the ending reveal and gave the worst justification ever for Malleus and Lilia's actions ever.

Regardless, I hope more people manage to move past this and appreciate his character for what it really is soon though. He's an amazingly tragic character; a lot of thought was put into how his experiences, strengths and weaknesses would convincingly connect, and he represents something relevant in the story's plot and themes.

The fact that I've seen some people unironically believe that Malleus may just be faking his cluelessness of social cues to hide his "true evil" is evidence to how convincing his character's situation is, that even some in the audience who know more about him than the characters would still end up in the same place of doubt and distrust of Malleus because of what he's capable of.

Aight thank you for reading👍

#twst #twisted wonderland #twst book 7 spoilers #malleus draconia #twst writing analysis ?#diasomnia #i am his number 1 defender #ignore me just putting random photos in between text i tried separating chunks of text to make it more readable lol #twst character analysis ?

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catpriciousmarjara · 10 months

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Tell me: Is He Gay or In a Sherwani?

Imposition of western norms in fandom analysis of Asian characters

With the rising popularity of Indian cinema sparked by the recent success of RRR on international platforms as well as the easy availability of multiple streaming services, in addition to the appearance of South Asian characters in prominent roles in western, particularly US media, I've begun to see some concerning 'analysis' posts online. So I thought I'd address something I found common in most of these takes.

Guys, characterizing your blorbos as queer is great and all, love it, but you're making a fundamental mistake by making their clothing choices the foundation for your queer headcanons, especially when it comes to male characters. Do not apply existing western cultural ideas regarding male clothing onto South Asian characters and their dressing please.

The vast majority of the clothes being used by people in various online spaces as 'evidence' of a character being queer(gay or bi mostly) are just normal Indian clothing for men, like daily wear. A top being pink or a character's wardrobe being mostly pastel means absolutely nothing...cos Indian clothing tends to be colourful in general and the tendency to ascribe colours masculine and feminine qualities is considerably less in the subcontinent. I'm not saying it doesn't exist, but generally not a concern.

There's also this pervasive idea that colourful clothing = flamboyance = queer and that itself is something many people have already pointed as a deeply flawed way of thinking and a stereotype. Furthermore, even if you do lean into the archetype of queer men being flamboyant, subscribing to the 'stereotypes exist for a reason don't they?' school of thought perhaps, there's also the fact that ideas of what is considered flamboyant change dramatically across different cultures. What is 'flamboyant' for someone might just be normal for others. Like maybe pink or purple or yellow might be considered too much, unmanly, emasculating etc in the US or something but they're just perfectly normal colours for men to wear in many, many cultures.

It's the 'Is he Gay or European?' principle. Did you characterize this Indian character (or any South Asian character really) as queer because of their canonical behaviour and portrayal, or did you just see their clothing and decide they're queer because being well groomed and having a colourful wardrobe is a character trait you exclusively ascribe to being queer?

Like guys, I like Chaipunk like the rest of you, but if you consider Pavitr queer just because his costume is a lot fancier than the others' (An actual take I've seen multiple times) without taking into account his cultural background....¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Let me make this clear, I don't think people need a ten page analysis to imagine their fave as queer. Headcanoning a character as queer can have any reason ranging from 'I said so and so it is' to 'this is my light character analysis that makes a masters thesis look shabby' and they're all valid and an integral part of the fandom experience. What I am annoyed at are these so-called 'well-researched' theories that did not make the slightest effort to look into South Asian culture and simply transposed their western bias onto Indian media and confidently make flat out wrong judgements and mislead other people. Clothing based sexual identity determinism is the least of it. That I can at least understand through the lens of a habitual process built through years of analyzing crumbs of queer representation available only through queer coded characters and symbolism such as clothing choices being the only way to see an aspect of yourself portrayed in an aggressively heteronormative media ecosystem. I do that too, because media is tragically heteronormative everywhere. But the rest? Its just straight up misinformation and misrepresentation touted as truth.

Its the same with relationships between men. There are plenty of cultures where skinship between men is not unusual and dynamics and nuances tend to be vastly different from western representations of male friendships. In xianxia and wuxia fandoms you can see this same problem in a different font when outsiders, most often the western side of the fandom, try to apply their own standards and morals onto the original work and try to interpret it through a lens it was never supposed to be interpreted through in the first place, except maybe for comparative analysis. This practice itself isn't a major problem, its natural for people to apply what is familiar to them to try and understand something new. But when this is also accompanied by them foisting their personal interpretation and analysis as the 'correct' one and trying to impose it on the fandom as a whole, it escalates into a powder keg situation as you can imagine.

Again, not saying that western parts of fandoms are the root of all evil or anything like that, gods know how toxic netizens can be. But in this specific situation, where people try to impose western ideals on to non-western content and assumes the universalism of their own principles and value systems? Indeed an issue to be addressed.

#ATSV #South Asian Characters #Desi characters #South Asian culture #Desi Culture #Fandom analysis #LGBTQ+#Brown culture #Spiderman: Across the Spiderverse #Pavitr Prabhakhar #Hobie Brown #Chaipunk #RRR #Miss Marvel #Tagging Miss Marvel and RRR only because they're in the intro-two pieces of media that are good examples of the increased attention-#on South Asian characters and Indian cinema #Not included in the body of the post except under umbrella terms like South Asian character/South Asian media & other such categories

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mr-laveau · 1 month

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People don't take audio RP seriously and I have opinions about it

I can't find the original post but the gist is a discussion on how people don't treat Audio RP as a serious medium of media and story-telling which I agree with. People don't. To mark it with a disclaimer tho-I don't inherently disagree with that post, I thought there were some valid points brought but I wanted to throw my hat in the ring as a VA and as a person who consumed a lot of Audio RP content and still does to this day (I just don't got a lot of time to be a fan and a creator whilst working a job) so here it is, my opinions on why people don't take this seriously and bi-products of that.

To start, I wanna say that Audio RP to me specifically is by its nature very collaborative because I as a VA and writer have to make my character appealing whilst also understanding my audience and what their appeal to my characters are*. It's kinda why I think Erik and the Redacted fandom have such different views on characters and the story-Erik does not have much of a connection with his audience (not hate, just a fact) so things tend to feel flat in some areas versus others-my point however is that I genuinely believe that if you want to make Audio RP, you have to actually understand your audience a little bit, which creates a good segway to my first point.

*if someone doesn't like your character, this isn't to say you're not doing a good job, it just means that people have preferences and their preferences do not align with your character.

Firstly, not a lot of VAs understand the RP(Role Play) part of Audio RP, and it shows. I think a lot of people who make content in this sphere don't take into account the person who's listening to their audios and following along. I'm not going to pretend I know about this but I am going to say that it shows sometimes when you don't understand the core of your audience and it causes people to disengage with your audios because you don't take into account who is listening to your audio (which creates problems like audios which are hard to engage with because of a speaker talking too much/too fast to process anything, issues where listeners are treated less like characters and more like ear pieces and problems where the speaker is written more to show them off than to be engaged with a listener). Really and truly the crux of this is in my opinion is that a lot of people who came into Audio RP, seem to have never RPed with another person or are unfamiliar with those spaces (TTRPG, Text-based Roleplay, Fandom Roleplay and the like) and rather saw an audio RP video and just did something like that (not hating, I started because I liked Castle Audios and wanted to be cool like her). That is not only focusing on VAs, that also applies to the audience, some of y'all are new to this and it shows because some of y'all don't know how to act right*

*That being said, some of y'all don't know how to act right and that is because there's no compendium of ettiquette(/j) for how to engage with this media and that is not on y'all. That said, (lovingly) learn to learn to behave like a listener and less like a spectator.

RP is collaborative by nature because you are creating a character with a narrative for another character who engages with said narrative by role-playing together and creating a collaborative story. Half the fun of RP is that it's a process of two people showing off their dolls and having fun. That is not something that can be said a lot about some Audio RP channels because a lot audios do not take into account their listener as a participant in this process (no, this does not mean the audience has explicit rights to the story, let's calm down there(/j). I will add that Audio RP is different given that the listener cannot directly influence the story like traditional roleplays but that does not take away from the fact some VAs and script writers don't think about who is listening and focus too much on who is speaking.

Secondly, a lot of the audience does not know to engage with the medium and that's a hard pill to swallow because it's not their fault but it is also their fault (/lh). Put down the torches and hear me out. I think that a lot of people who interact with Audio RP do not have the best media literacy and I also think this is true for some VAs. Some people who listen to audios don't read enough into audios on more than a surface level view (which makes for people going "teehee, look at that loser listening to people talk") and some people read too much into an audio to the point that it breaks their immersion and they cannot focus on the audio but have to point shit out (this does not mean that you cannot be enthusiastic about lore and info in audios or notice errors in an audio). To solve this, I just have this to say: expand the media you intake and learn to think critically about what you're intaking and how you're intaking it. TLDR; consume media outside of your usual range and think about that media while questioning the media to see how you feel about it rather than have someone tell you about it. This also applies to VAs and Scriptwriters, it makes your work better, this is a fact of life and I need y'all to see that. Love you all so much and the work you put into this community cannot be understated. That said, everyone sometimes shows a lack of media literacy and awareness and it should be known that it's not just the audience.

Finally, Both creators and fans are trying to make the medium something it's not and they need to stop. This isn't to say you cannot advance or experiment with the medium but trying to make it something it is not will mess with the core idea of what it is, you lose people when you try to do X,Y and Z when you ain't even reached A*. A lot of the audience does not understand the limitations of Audio RP and they need to see what can be achieved within the space and what cannot be done. A lot of creators in the space try do too much and while I get the need to push boundaries, there comes a point where you need to reevaluate what you are trying to make and determine how you are going to do that moving forward. That is not to say you can only make a specific brand of audios and anything other than that isn't Audio RP. No cut that shit out, that is being an asshole. You can make whatever Audio RP you want, it just needs to be audio RP. At the end of the day, the goal is to make an audio where the listener feels like they are a part of it. How that looks can differ and that's okay.

*I'm adding onto this by saying that you can experiment with the medium of audio RP, different genres of it are valid (people like what they like) and there is no one way to do Audio RP and anyone who says there is a way is lying to you.

In conclusion, I want to add that a part of the list of reasons people don't take Audio RP seriously (on top of people not respecting VAs, people not being considerate, people treating Audio RP like they do fanfic and people just being people) is because we as a community are all over the place and don't even enage with our own community right and don't know to respect and treat the medium the way it should be. That's all folks!

#audio rp #audio roleplay #mr. laveau rambles #Some people might say this is a call out and to that; it's not #if i wanna call someone out I will call them out in public and I will call out their full government name to do it/lh #fandom #a bitch will not lie and I am that bitch because there's room to discuss and I can go at length to discuss this too/pos

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bougiebutchbinch · 6 months

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I am not the ableism thought police

(in gentle response to an ask that I won't be publishing, as I don't want the tumblr user to get any blowback, and I think they were asking in good faith)

It is not inherently ableist to enjoy the OFMD finale, despite the fact that myself and many other physically disabled people are Really Fucking Uncomfortable with certain choices that were made.

You can like whatever you like. There will never be perfect media, and OFMD is better than... many shows in terms of its representation of queers and characters of colour, at least. Go forth and enjoy it! I'm not trying to take that away from you!

Here, however, is a handy list of things that ARE actual ableismsTM:

pretending the finale of your fave show is beyond reproach from physically disabled critics

dismissing the concerns and hurt of so many disabled fans who felt incredibly let down by the finale (and who want to know whether the writers consulted with disabled people before writing that whole scene (especially putting the words 'I want to go' in Izzy's mouth. jfc.))

mocking disabled people who are upset about how his self-acceptance arc as a disabled queer man ended - in a show that is trying to be progressive, no less!

making gross statements like "saying Izzy is disabled removes his character agency". Just. Wtf. I don't know how to explain to you that disabled people have agency, and that 'disability' isn't a Bad Scary Word.

claiming that just because you are physically disabled and you don't mind the finale, other physically disabled people shouldn't voice their concerns

expecting disabled people to hold your hand and reassure you that it's okay to like a show even if it Committed A Big Ol' Ableism

All of those things are ableist, and you should avoid them.

TL;DR: Love the show as much as you like. Just don't talk down to disabled fans who are raising very valid points about the ableism surrounding Izzy's death and burial. And don't demand that we emotionally coddle you and assure you that you are a good person if you liked the ending of S2.

As always, able-bodied people are encouraged to reblog - but don't join the conversation unless you are offering support.

#ofmd #our flag means death #izzy hands #the izcourse #ofmd meta #israel hands #ableism #I am not the ableism thought police.#ofmd spoilers

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 7 months

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AITA for telling someone that roleplays are a two-way street and refusing to re-engage with them?

Occasionally, if I'm in the mood to write but I don't really know what, I'll browse ship tags on Omegle. Its become synonymous for roleplays, and I've found its (typically) pretty fun.

As with every social thing, there's the odd... Less than pleasant experience. Last night was one such experience. I connected to someone on a ship tag, they sent a prompt, and it was actually a pretty interesting one, so I responded.

It was an AU prompt, but I generally kept my characterisation as close to the character's canon as I could, while still matching it to roughly what someone's personality in that profession and location would be.

(E.g; if the character was a proper old-country style cowboy, or a socially awkward secretary, ect.)

It became very clear, very fast, that the other person had very, very specific ideas about the roleplay, what happens, what my character was supposed to say/do, ect. To the point where (as I later told them) they should've just written fanfic so they had complete control.

Near enough every time I responded, they'd "correct" it or argue against it both in character and in brackets as themselves. For example if I noted something about the background or story of my character, theirs would immediately say "no that's not what happened" or they'd say [hey actually can you change that, it doesn't fit/I don't like it/its not what I envisioned].

After about fifteen minutes of this I got incredibly vexed and decided I was done. I don't mind a roleplay having certain goals/main points/guidelines, but they were literally trying to control every tiny aspect of what I did. So I sent them this:

[I'm sorry, the RP sounded interesting in the prompt you sent, but its rapidly becoming clear you don't actually want a roleplay, you want to be the sole one dictating everything that happens. Honestly I think its best you turn this idea into a fanfic and not a roleplay. It kills off any enjoyment of the roleplay when I have you contradicting every tiny detail I include or dictating what I'm allowed to do or say. I'm not going to sit there waiting for you to approve of everything I intend to say. Thank you for your time, but good night.]

I disconnected, and decided I'd spend another fifteen minutes browsing the tag before I did something else. Well apparently, the other person decided they were going to spend fifteen minutes stalking the tag trying to find me again, spamming every connection with messages ranging from extreme insults and threats to demands I 'speak up again, bitch, I wanna talk' and so forth. After connecting to them for the tenth time, I sent:

[I'm not going to re-engage with you. I said what I did, and frankly, it was a valid statement. If you can't handle the fact that roleplaying means a 50/50 creative allowance with someone else, and that you can't micro-manage or bulldoze every single detail, then you shouldn't roleplay. Frankly, knowing how vile you can be from simple criticism, I'm glad I disconnected. Take a breather and re-evaluate yourself. I'd be embarrassed.]

Well. This morning I logged onto Tumblr and after some browsing, I actually came across them again. Here. By means of a post where they included screenshots of everything and are even going so far as threatening to stalk Tumblr and AO3 to 'match up the writing' so they can find me and presumably say their piece or whatever.

I talked to a friend about it, and surprisingly, they think I'm an asshole. Not for what I said in the first place, but for not re-approaching the other person (through DMs) so they'll stop filling the ship's tag with negative stuff. (They've made 3 posts about it all so far.)

I don't want to do that because it means opening up my private social media to this obviously unhinged individual. I know I can expect to be spammed, sent hate mail, have them try to track down my other socials, ect. I could make an alt account for it, but honestly that's effort I don't see the point in making. If they can't let this go, its not my problem.

AITA? Should I make an alt account just to let them get it out of their system? I don't know how to proceed with this.

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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soracities · 1 year

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Hey! It has been on my mind lately and i just wanna ask..idk if it would make sense but i just noticed that nowadays ppl cant separate the authors and their books (ex. when author wrote a story about cheating and ppl starts bashing the author for romanticizing cheating and even to a point of cancelling the author for not setting a good/healthy example of a relationship) any thoughts about it?

I have many, many thoughts on this, so this may get a little unwieldy but I'll try to corall it together as best I can.

But honestly, I think sometimes being unable to separate the author from the work (which is interesting to me to see because some people are definitely not "separating" anything even though they think they are; they just erase the author entirely as an active agent, isolate the work, and call it "objectivity") has a lot to do with some people being unable to separate the things they read from themselves.

I'm absolutely not saying it's right, but it's an impulse I do understand. If you read a book and love it, if it transforms your life, or defines a particular period of your life, and then you find out that the author has said or done something awful--where does that leave you? Someone awful made something beautiful, something you loved: and now that this point of communion exists between you and someone whose views you'd never agree with, what does that mean for who you are? That this came from the mind of a person capable of something awful and spoke to your mind--does that mean you're like them? Could be like them?

Those are very uncomfortable questions and I think if you have a tendency to look at art or literature this way, you will inevitable fall into the mindset where only "Good" stories can be accepted because there's no distinction between where the story ends and you begin. As I said, I can see where it comes from but I also find it profoundly troubling because i think one of the worst things you can do to literature is approach it with the expectation of moral validation--this idea that everything you consume, everything you like and engage with is some fundamental insight into your very character as opposed to just a means of looking at or questioning something for its own sake is not just narrow-minded but dangerous.

Art isn't obliged to be anything--not moral, not even beautiful. And while I expend very little (and I mean very little) energy engaging with or even looking at internet / twitter discourse for obvious reasons, I do find it interesting that people (online anyway) will make the entire axis of their critique on something hinge on the fact that its bad representation or justifying / romanticizing something less than ideal, proceeding to treat art as some sort of conduit for moral guidance when it absolutely isn't. And they will also hold that this critique comes from a necessarily good and just place (positive representation, and I don't know, maybe in their minds it does) while at the same time setting themselves apart from radical conservatives who do the exact same thing, only they're doing it from the other side.

To make it abundantly clear, I'm absolutely not saying you should tolerate bigots decrying that books about the Holocaust, race, homophobia, or lgbt experiences should be banned--what I am saying, is that people who protest that a book like Maus or Persepolis is going to "corrupt children", and people who think a book exploring the emotional landscape of a deeply flawed character, who just happens to be from a traditionally marginalised group or is written by someone who is, is bad representation and therefore damaging to that community as a whole are arguments that stem from the exact same place: it's a fundamental inability, or outright refusal, to accept the interiority and alterity of other people, and the inherent validity of the experiences that follow. It's the same maniacal, consumptive, belief that there can be one view and one view only: the correct view, which is your view--your thoughts, your feelings.

There is also dangerous element of control in this. Someone with racist views does not want their child to hear anti-racist views because as far as they are concerned, this child is not a being with agency, but a direct extension of them and their legacy. That this child may disagree is a profound rupture and a threat to the cohesion of this person's entire worldview. Nothing exists in and of and for itself here: rather the multiplicity of the world and people's experiences within it are reduced to shadowy agents that are either for us or against us. It's not about protecting children's "innocence" ("think of the children", in these contexts, often just means "think of the status quo"), as much as it is about protecting yourself and the threat to your perceived place in the world.

And in all honestt I think the same holds true for the other side--if you cannot trust yourself to engage with works of art that come from a different standpoint to yours, or whose subject matter you dislike, without believing the mere fact of these works' existence will threaten something within you or society in general (which is hysterical because believe me, society is NOT that flimsy), then that is not an issue with the work itself--it's a personal issue and you need to ask yourself if it would actually be so unthinkable if your belief about something isn't as solid as you think it is, and, crucially, why you have such little faith in your own critical capacity that the only response these works ilicit from you is that no one should be able to engage with them. That's not awareness to me--it's veering very close to sticking your head in the sand, while insisting you actually aren't.

Arbitrarily adding a moral element to something that does not exist as an agent of moral rectitude but rather as an exploration of deeply human impulses, and doing so simply to justify your stance or your discomfort is not only a profoundly inadequate, but also a deeply insidious, way of papering over your insecurities and your own ignorance (i mean this in the literal sense of the word), of creating a false and dishonest certainty where certainty does not exist and then presenting this as a fact that cannot and should not be challenged and those who do are somehow perverse or should have their characters called into question for it. It's reductive and infantilising in so many ways and it also actively absolves you of any responsibility as a reader--it absolves you of taking responsibility for your own interpretation of the work in question, it absolves you of responsibility for your own feelings (and, potentially, your own biases or preconceptions), it absolves you of actual, proper, thought and engagement by laying the blame entirely on a rogue piece of literature (as if prose is something sentient) instead of acknowledging that any instance of reading is a two-way street: instead of asking why do I feel this way? what has this text rubbed up against? the assumption is that the book has imposed these feelings on you, rather than potentially illuminated what was already there.

Which brings me to something else which is that it is also, and I think this is equally dangerous, lending books and stories a mythical, almost supernatural, power that they absolutely do not have. Is story-telling one of the most human, most enduring, most important and life-altering traditions we have? Yes. But a story is also just a story. And to convince yourself that books have a dangerous transformative power above and beyond what they are actually capable of is, again, to completely erase people's agency as readers, writers' agency as writers and makers (the same as any other craft), and subsequently your own. And erasing agency is the very point of censors banning books en masse. It's not an act of stupidity or blind ignorance, but a conscious awareness of the fact that people will disagree with you, and for whatever reason you've decided that you are not going to let them.

Writers and poets are not separate entities to the rest of us: they aren't shamans or prophets, gifted and chosen beings who have some inner, profound, knowledge the rest of us aren't privy to (and should therefore know better or be better in some regard) because moral absolutism just does not exist. Every writer, no matter how affecting their work may be, is still Just Some Guy Who Made a Thing. Writing can be an incredibly intimate act, but it can also just be writing, in the same way that plumbing is plumbing and weeding is just weeding and not necessarily some transcendant cosmic endeavour in and of itself. Authors are no different, when you get down to it, from bakers or electricians; Nobel laureates are just as capable of coming out with distasteful comments about women as your annoying cousin is and the fact that they wrote a genre-defying work does not change that, or vice-versa. We imbue books with so much power and as conduits of the very best and most human traits we can imagine and hope for, but they aren't representations of the best of humanity--they're simply expressions of humanity, which includes the things we don't like.

There are some authors I love who have said and done things I completely disagree with or whose views I find abhorrent--but I'm not expecting that, just because they created something that changed my world, they are above and beyond the ordinarly, the petty, the spiteful, or cruel. That's not condoning what they have said and done in the least: but I trust myself to be able to read these works with awareness and attention, to pick out and examine and attempt to understand the things that I find questionable, to hold on to what has moved me, and to disregard what I just don't vibe with or disagree with. There are writers I've chosen not to engage with, for my own personal reasons: but I'm not going to enforce this onto someone else because I can see what others would love in them, even if what I love is not strong enough to make up for what I can't. Terrance Hayes put perfectly in my view, when he talks about this and being capable of "love without forgiveness". Writing is a profoundly human heritage and those who engage with it aren't separate from that heritage as human because they live in, and are made by, the exact same world as anyone else.

The measure of good writing for me has hardly anything to do with whatever "virtue" it's perceived to have and everything to do with sincerity. As far as I'm concerned, "positive representation" is not about 100% likeable characters who never do anything problematic or who are easily understood. Positive representation is about being afforded the full scope of human feelings, the good, the bad, and the ugly, and not having your humanity, your dignity, your right to exist in the world questioned because all of these can only be seen through the filter of race, or gender, religion, or ethicity and interpreted according to our (profoundly warped) perceptions of those categories and what they should or shouldn't represent. True recognition of someone's humanity does not lie in finding only what is held in common between you (and is therefore "acceptable", with whatever you put into that category), but in accepting everything that is radically different about them and not letting this colour the consideration you give.

Also, and it may sound harsh, but I think people forget that fictional characters are fictional. If I find a particularly fucked up relationship dynamic compelling (as I often do), or if I decide to write and explore that dynamic, that's not me saying two people who threaten to kill each other and constantly hurt each other is my ideal of romance and that this is exactly how I want to be treated: it's me trying to find out what is really happening below the surface when two people behave like this. It's me exploring something that would be traumatizing and deeply damaging in real life, in a safe and fictional setting so I can gain some kind of understanding about our darker and more destructive impulses without being literally destroyed by them, as would happen if all of this were real. But it isn't real. And this isn't a radical or complex thing to comprehend, but it becomes incomprehensible if your sole understanding of literature is that it exists to validate you or entertain you or cater to you, and if all of your interpretations of other people's intentions are laced with a persistent sense of bad faith. Just because you have not forged any identity outside of this fictional narrative doesn't mean it's the same for others.

Ursula K. le Guin made an extremely salient point about children and stories in that children know the stories you tell them--dragons, witches, ghouls, whatever--are not real, but they are true. And that sums it all up. There's a reason children learning to lie is an incredibly important developmental milestone, because it shows that they have achieved an incredibly complex, but vitally important, ability to hold two contradictory statements in their minds and still know which is true and which isn't. If you cannot delve into a work, on the terms it sets, as a fictional piece of literature, recognize its good points and note its bad points, assess what can have a real world impact or reflects a real world impact and what is just creative license, how do you possible expect to recognize when authority and propaganda lies to you? Because one thing propaganda has always utilised is a simplistic, black and white depiction of The Good (Us) and The Bad (Them). This moralistic stance regarding fiction does not make you more progressive or considerate; it simply makes it easier to manipulate your ideas and your feelings about those ideas because your assessments are entirely emotional and surface level and are fuelled by a refusal to engage with something beyond the knee-jerk reaction it causes you to have.

Books are profoundly, and I do mean profoundly, important to me-- and so much of who I am and the way I see things is probably down to the fact that stories have preoccupied me wherever I go. But I also don't see them as vital building blocks for some core facet or a pronouncement of Who I Am. They're not badges of honour or a cover letter I put out into the world for other people to judge and assess me by, and approve of me (and by extension, the things I say or feel). They're vehicles through which I explore and experience whatever it is that I'm most caught by: not a prophylactic, not a mode of virtue signalling, and certainly not a means of signalling a moral stance.

I think at the end of the day so much of this tendency to view books as an extension of yourself (and therefore of an author) is down to the whole notion of "art as a mirror", and I always come back to Fran Lebowitz saying that it "isn't a mirror, it's a door". And while I do think it's important to have that mirror (especially if you're part of a community that never sees itself represented, or represented poorly and offensively) I think some people have moved into the mindset of thinking that, in order for art to be good, it needs to be a mirror, it needs to cater to them and their experiences precisely--either that or that it can only exist as a mirror full stop, a reflection of and for the reader and the writer (which is just incredibly reductive and dismissive of both)--and if art can only exist as a mirror then anything negative that is reflected back at you must be a condemnation, not a call for exploration or an attempt at understanding.

As I said, a mirror is important but to insist on it above all else isn't always a positive thing: there are books I related to deeply because they allowed me to feel so seen (some by authors who looked nothing like me), but I have no interest in surrounding myself with those books all the time either--I know what goes on in my head which is precisely why I don't always want to live there. Being validated by a character who's "just like me" is amazing but I also want--I also need-- to know that lives and minds and events exist outside of the echo-chamber of my own mind. The mirror is comforting, yes, but if you spend too long with it, it also becomes isolating: you need doors because they lead you to ideas and views and characters you could never come up with on your own. A world made up of various Mes reflected back to me is not a world I want to be immersed in because it's a world with very little texture or discovery or room for growth and change. Your sense of self and your sense of other people cannot grow here; it just becomes mangled.

Art has always been about dialogue, always about a me and a you, a speaker and a listener, even when it is happening in the most internal of spaces: to insist that art only ever tells you what you want to hear, that it should only reflect what you know and accept is to undermine the very core of what it seeks to do in the first place, which is establish connection. Art is a lifeline, I'm not saying it isn't. But it's also not an instruction manual for how to behave in the world--it's an exploration of what being in the world looks like at all, and this is different for everyone. And you are treading into some very, very dangerous waters the moment you insist it must be otherwise.

Whatever it means to be in the world, it is anything but straightforward. In this world people cheat, people kill, they manipulate, they lie, they torture and steal--why? Sometimes we know why, but more often we don't--but we take all these questions and write (or read) our way through them hoping that, if we don't find an answer, we can at least find our way to a place where not knowing isn't as unbearable anymore (and sometimes it's not even about that; it's just about telling a story and wanting to make people laugh). It's an endless heritage of seeking with countless variations on the same statements which say over and over again I don't know what to make of this story, even as I tell it to you. So why am I telling it? Do I want to change it? Can I change it? Yes. No. Maybe. I have no certainty in any of this except that I can say it. All I can do is say it.

Writing, and art in general, are one of the very, very, few ways we can try and make sense of the apparently arbitrary chaos and absurdity of our lives--it's one of the only ways left to us by which we can impose some sense of structure or meaning, even if those things exists in the midst of forces that will constantly overwhelm those structures, and us. I write a poem to try and make sense of something (grief, love, a question about octopuses) or to just set down that I've experienced something (grief, love, an answer about octpuses). You write a poem to make sense of, resolve, register, or celebrate something else. They don't have to align. They don't have to agree. We don't even need to like each other much. But in both of these instances something is being said, some fragment of the world as its been perceived or experienced is being shared. They're separate truths that can exist at the same time. Acknowledging this is the only means we have of momentarily bridging the gaps that will always exist between ourselves and others, and it requires a profound amount of grace, consideration and forbearance. Otherwise, why are we bothering at all?

#this is so much longer than i intended but yeah. those are my very long 2 cents #tbh i also think social media makes it worse in a way especially bc “transparency” has become a form of public vetting which is insane to m #me* transparency and honesty are not the same thing ans its ludicrous that this is where we're at and while we all have to live with this #demand for transparency i do think it affects writers differently bc the whole art as mirror thing comes to the fore in this argument #why would you sit with your feelings about a book when its easier and more accessible for you to @ the authors twitter handle #but anyway #ask #anonymous #book talks

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luthienne · 7 months

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what do you do for a living? (/job?) I am currently in a crisis and need some guidance. I look up to you a lot, I love your blog, we have the same passions for poetry and writing and music, even daredevil! My crisis is that I dont know what to do. In university I take classes but I dont know what I want to be. My art and writing feel pointless sometimes. All the jobs i want to do I know im not skilled enough to achieve or itd be very hard to get by. If you dont mind giving out advice... please help! ❤

hi anon <3 i think that figuring out what we're supposed to do for a living often gets tied to the idea that we're supposed to find that one niche in the world where we fit, where we're meant to be and where we're meant to contribute; where we're meant to shine, and find deep meaning in our own lives. and maybe that does happen for some people. but in reality i think we're all capable of doing many different things, and finding purpose in many different things. and in working toward many different skillsets we acquire different skillsets that apply to many other types of work.

and i don't think anything is ever set in stone. i got my undergrad & grad degrees in music, and then i found that i didn't have it in me to be a part of that world anymore. and i felt that i had no meaning in my life without it. i was No One without music, i had no identity outside of my voice—despite the deep sense of purpose and fate, even, that i felt for my life up until that moment in music, in singing, in acting. up until that moment i knew in my bones my purpose in life. and then the ground was swept out from under me. it didn't matter that i had known with certainty what my life was supposed to be because it wasn't that any longer. and i realized that i could never again tie my identity to my art, to my music, to my writing, to my job. my voice has a purpose not because it must be enough to sustain me financially or because enough people have validated my talent but because it brings me joy. i came back to music because singing brought me joy again; i thought i would never feel that again.

something i have learned through this is 1) music, like most other art forms, is not a meritocracy; there is no such thing as "you are an excellent [artist/singer/writer] and therefore you will have the career owed to you" because so much more than merit and hard work go into careers like this. it takes not only talent and work ethic but circumstance and luck and wealth. lessons cost money, coachings costs money, auditions cost money, applications cost money, travel costs money, wardrobe costs money. 2) the process is not the career. i love to practice, i love to learn music, i love to get into character, and to engage with my colleagues in rehearsal rooms and onstage. i don't love the abuse thrown at singers from directors and teachers and coaches, i don't love auditions, i don’t love the unpredictability of gig work and contract work, i don't love the expendable lens through which singers are viewed by the industry. i've come back to music but my goals have shifted.

all that to say, i don't think we have to know what we want to be. we don't have to want to be anything. our lives have deep meaning whether we have "successful" careers or careers that just pay the bills while we continue to pursue our creative loves. i wouldn't place too much importance on needing to find what you are supposed to be because you will become who you are supposed to be regardless. it is never a waste to pursue something we love, and we will acquire and internalize new skills in any field that we can apply to other fields. and maybe your interests will dramatically shift, or maybe not. i think it's very natural to have vocational shifts throughout our lives, and it's not indicative of failure. art that is made personally or professionally doesn't have more or less value based on its financial profit. the money i make from singing isn't enough to sustain me—i have to do other self-employment gigs to make up the difference. most artists do. but i don't regret the time and the heart i have invested in music, and i am sustained through the work i put into it, and sustained by the relationships and friendships that i have developed through it.

i send you my whole heart. i know how it feels to look at the future and not know what you're supposed to do with your one, precious life. sometimes we have to live in the uncertainty and know that it won't be like that forever. on the flip side, the moments of certainty won't last forever either. and in-between there is all the living we do. i promise you're not alone in this <3

#ask #anon #i am so sorry if this is not helpful but truly sending you so much love <33333

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revehae · 3 months

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enchant me

pairing ↠ fairy!yeri x (f) reader

genre .. warnings ↠ smut, noncon touching, oral, lowkey morally ambiguous, fairy yeri × human reader

summary ↠ when your co-worker tells you that she knows a place where fairies are being sold, you're inclined to believe it's bullshit. that is, until you see them for yourself, and wind up taking yeri home. but having a new roommate is not without its fair share of troubles.

wc ↠ 4.0k

a/n ↠ part 3/5 of the legend has it series!

don't like it, don't read.

buy a pet fairy, your co-worker said. it’ll be fun, your co-worker said.

it had never been your plan, you doubted the existence of the supernatural and thought she’d been pulling your leg until you saw the incarcerated set of fairies gathered in the back of the store for yourself, and you somehow let her convince you to poke around.

your co-worker had given you the location of the place where the fairies would be sold. you were skeptical, for obvious reasons. it didn’t help that the store itself was very lowkey, not publicizing their business of abducted fairies. matter of fact, you had to have the right contacts to even know it existed. on the outside, it was a regular pet shop, though that was only a front for the real moneymaker.

i’m only poking around, you told yourself, monitoring the several caged fairies. your arms were crossed. you could feel the owner’s eyes fixed to your back. he watched his customers very attentively, which was valid. it wasn’t general knowledge that fairies existed and this was a very illegal side business.

cloaking your incredulity with indifference, you curiously strolled around with a poker face, willing yourself not to gawk as you passed by fairy after fairy. they looked a bit different than you expected. had they not had those giant wings attached to their backsides, you would have thought they were human.

these conditions, however, certainly weren’t human. caged like animals and who was to be sure whether they ate or not. you almost felt bad. most of them looked bored and dejected.

there was one that caught your eye, more striking than all of the others. though not of them looked exactly thrilled to be captured, she was the most obvious and tenacious, throwing herself against the metal cage as if that would get it to break. you noticed a number of cuts and bruises on her skin, though it wasn’t that hard of a guess to make that they were self-inflicted.

that day, though you constantly reminded yourself that you were only present to poke around, you came home with a pet fairy.

that was roughly two months ago. now, you and yeri, as she’d begrudgingly told you her name was, were a bit more acquainted with each other.

towards the beginning of your journey together, yeri was hell-bent on hating you, in spite of the fact that you were the one to free her from that godforsaken place. you didn’t appreciate how ungrateful she was, always bristling in annoyance at her impudence, but you didn’t give up on earning her favor.

you were a quick learner and yeri was a liker of many things. her room that you’d appointed her was very indicative of her character, filled to the brim with things she loved. her stubbornness didn’t come to an abrupt end there, but she slowly relented.

it took months of spoiling and princess treatment before you could be certain that yeri was fond of you. though when you did know, it was only because it was undeniable. it would be more apt to say that she was obsessed with you. the second you got home from work, she was voluntarily slipping your coat off of your shoulders to hang on the rack and gushing about her day and how much she missed you, which you didn’t mind. you didn’t have a lot of things to say when she asked how your days went, much less a lot of new things. it was mundane work and every day bled into each other.

fairies were not cheap, you learned, and for good reason. you figured they were hard enough to capture, especially stubborn ones like yours. it made sense to yeri that you had a good-paying job and a large house, where it was difficult for her to become board. whatever she wanted, it was at her fingertips. she did a lot of online shopping while you were away and called random stores mostly for fun.

watching her come to you, fluttering down the stairs, was the highlight of your days sometimes. never did you imagine you would find yourself attached to a fairy of all things, especially when you hardly knew they existed, but life wasn’t without its fair share of surprises.

every month, yeri’s bedroom seemed a lot more crowded. it was neat, though only because you had ample maids. given their contracts, you weren’t worried about them snitching to anyone about your supernatural affairs because you knew nobody would risk your kind of money to tattle.

hands resting at your hips, you asked skeptically, “do you really need all of this stuff?”

“yes,” yeri said in a heartbeat. she was resting on her bed, which was much more like a hammock, but if she liked it, you loved it. “i need all of this stuff.”

you rolled your eyes at her repetition. “okay, echo,” you droned. “i just think stuff like a corner of hello kitty plushies is a little unnecessary.”

yeri retorted, “i think your problem is that you don’t have enough stuff. you know, where i’m from, rich fairies had everything in the forest. you have all the money in the world and not a spec of color on your bedroom walls.”

that was true. if something wasn’t essential to your lifestyle, then you most likely weren’t going to buy it, although you had your reasons. “i don’t have time for extra stuff anyways,” you replied, sighing. “even if i bought cool things i liked, i wouldn’t have time to indulge myself.”

yeri had her chin supported by her palms, throwing you a look that was an astounding blend of boredom and cuteness. “then why buy a big house filled with things you don’t have to use? like a pool and a theater?”

“to attract, my love. bees flock to only the prettiest of flowers,” you said, crossing your arms. “speaking of which, i need you to stay in your room and be very quiet tonight. i’m having a guest over.”

“a guest?”

“yes. a guest,” you said. “so please, for the love of god, be on your best behavior.”

“i’m not a kid. i know how to conduct myself,” yeri huffed irritably.

you took her word for it, and true to her word, yeri conducted herself very skillfully that evening. but when she heard the ungodly noises stretching from your bedroom that evening, she was of half a mind to storm in there and tear whatever girl you were with to shreds.

that was when she realized, for the first time, that she was obsessed with you.

the second time was only two weeks later.

“please,” yeri begged, eyes twinkling in desperation.

you shook your head. “no.”

yeri’s bottom lip was jutted out, little stars glimmering in her eyes as she donned her sweetest tone and begged for the umpteenth time, “please? i will never ask you for anything ever again.” that’s a lie, she thought, and you were probably thinking it too, but she lived in the moment.

she was trying very desperately to convince you to take a day off, mainly so that you could lounge around your house and actually wallow in the amenities that you’d paid for. the indoor pool, namely, though you hadn’t really questioned why.

you heaved a breath. “yeri, i hope you understand that i have to go to work so that i can overindulge all of your costly interests. i can’t just call out whenever i want.”

yeri hummed. “what if you were sick?”

“i’m not sick.”

“yes, you are,” yeri chirped, giggling with sheer mischief.

it was no secret what she was implying and you hated that you were actually considering lying to your boss, but at last, yeri was your only vice. “fine,” you relented. “i’m sick.”

the lie was definitely worth the gigantic smile on yeri’s face as she watched you make a beeline for your phone.

half an hour later, you were meeting yeri at the indoor pool, clad in a bikini you initially doubted that you even had. you couldn’t even remember the last time that you’d worn one, though to be fair, it had most definitely been a while. you weren’t upset or annoyed that yeri had convinced you to take a day off, even with as much of a workaholic as you were, because it was a much needed break.

there were glass windows everywhere and a tall roof, but yeri wasn’t paying any mind to none of that. little did you know, for a good minute, her gaze was locked on your figure. she had seen your riches. what she had not seen, up until this very moment, was your exposed body.

she couldn’t get enough of your legs. for the most part, you generally wore slacks or knee-length skirts, though when you weren’t working you typically wore sweats. yeri had a nice view of your ass for a split second, and when you turned, an even better view of your breasts sitting nicely in your bikini top.

before you could notice her lewd stare, yeri dived into the pool, sporting a bikini of her own. it was pink, which you quickly learned was her favorite color.

“bet you didn’t know that fairies have different elements,” yeri said when her head popped back up. “i’m a water sprite.”

preferring to step down the stairs into the water, you crawled down the little steps. “yeah?”

“yeah,” she repeated. “do you wanna see something cool?”

there was a lull of silence while you hesitated. you never knew what to expect with yeri, but judging from the mischievous little twinkle in her eyes, it was nothing good. “i’m not sure if i do,” you trailed.

“please?”

realizing she would most definitely beg you until you agreed, you blew out a breath and relented, “fine.”

what you weren’t prepared for, however, was for a giant ball of water to knock you square in the chest. yeri giggled, as if there was something funny, while you spat out the water in your mouth and contemplated your entire existence.

“ha. ha,” you grumbled dryly, wringing out your hair.

your face was bristling with irritation and your whole body was glistening with droplets of water, and, gawking at you while you fetched a towel, yeri realized for the second time that her thoughts of you were all-consuming.

and it didn’t stop there. day after day, week after week, you drove yeri past the threshold of insanity. it was ironic that she went from loathing you with her utter being to dreaming of your hands on her body in her sleep, but there was no undoing the temptation.

to make matters worse, you didn’t seem to want her at all. obviously, you liked yeri and all, eating meals together instead of having them alone in your study like you used to and taking more days off, but you treated her as if she was merely a pet that you had to take care of.

and it was maddening. she couldn’t stand feeling like the pining was so terribly one-sided. none of her efforts to seduce you were fruitful. not even her walking around in her underwear, and given the simmering season (never mind your great air conditioning) you somewhat understood why she roamed the halls half-naked.

she hated when you told her to stay put because you had a guest coming over. she hated when she had to hear the sound of another girl’s ecstatic moans blaring from down the hallway, and it was only fitting that she used your credit card to buy noise-canceling headphones. she hated that she had to touch herself while some undeserving woman got to touch you.

worst of all, she loathed being made feel like an animal, no matter how primal her needs were. humans, yeri chided, shaking her head with folded arms. so, so stupid.

but yeri was not yeri without a game plan. an unethical one, but that only served her character. you were going to see her for what she was - not the creature she was marketed as. that she was certain of.

a couple of nights later, you came home exhausted, which yeri wholeheartedly expected. she was more than familiarized with your schedules and you were never not spent after long days of negotiating with clients. you never thought she understood your sophisticated language when you talked about your job, but it had been said that she was full of surprises.

on more taxing days, you preferred skipping long dinners and going to bed as soon as possible. yeri was questionably understanding, not begging for another five minutes with you like you’d come to expect, but you were far too tired to linger on it and went upstairs to take a shower.

yeri waited an hour or an half before she came up to your room. if you followed your typical routine, then you surely should have been out like a light. as expected, you were. yeri quiet pushed open your door, careful not to wake you, and watched out for signs of disturbance in case you were to stir.

but you didn’t. it was almost as if you were dead, though yeri knew from your heaving chest and ever so gentle snores that you were far from.

whatever spontaneous little plan yeri had in store for you slipped from her thoughts the second she pulled back your comforter and revealed your sleeping body to her gaze. you were in a flimsy nightgown that looked far too good on you and it made her brain short-circuit. it was unfair that other people, people that weren’t her, got to see what was underneath.

bewitched, her hand dropped to your leg, touching it like she had tirelessly longed to for so many months. she wasn’t asking for much, she thought. she just wanted you to see her the same way that she saw you.

your legs were warm. yeri was no longer paying attention to your resting face, completely engrossed with the rest of your body. your legs were soft, too. she could smell the lotion you’d lathered over your skin before bed and even the smell of you was inviting.

yeri’s hand inched further up your legs, desperate to pull back all of the metaphorical layers and see what was underneath - or in between. her fingers wiggled around your thighs, her heartbeat quickening the closer she got between the pair. the gap was closing almost in slow motion, her lips open to unrestrain her ragged breathing.

then, she felt your fingers tighten around her wrist and you grumbled, “what do you think you’re doing?”

yeri was vexed. so close, she grimaced. and yet she was so far away. she huffed, “what does it look like?”

“it looks like you’re touching me,” you said, in spite of the fact it was obviously a rhetorical question. not that you gave a damn. “notably without my consent.”

though someone would expect her to, yeri didn’t try to withdraw her hand, even though it was tightly locked between yours. “you don’t get to do this,” she mumbled.

“excuse me?”

“you don’t get to act as if you’re the one hurt,” yeri added, finally snatching her arm away. “you don’t know how long i’ve waited for you to notice me, but instead, you just fuck all of these dumb whores that only want you because you’re rich!”

“yeri…,” you started.

yeri interjected, tears running down her face as she angrily screamed, “don’t say my name now! they don’t deserve you. i’m the only one that sees you for more than your money, you know that? they don’t know you like i do - they don’t love you like i do!”

“yeri,” you called out again, snappier. “i’m not a mind reader. why wasn’t your first thought to just tell me this?”

yeri crossed her arms, stubborn. “i don’t know.”

“yeri, sit down.”

though she wanted to disobey, the look in your stare quickly discouraged her from doing so. she plopped on your mattress, lips jutted.

“if you wanted me, all you had to do was say that,” you told her, grabbing her hands.

yeri’s eyes twinkled. “does that mean you want me too?”

you answered her with a kiss, pressing your lips flush against hers. yeri didn’t hesitate to kiss you back, heart fluttering. warmth filled her chest and wings flittered in her gut.

when you pulled back, it was only to croon in her ear, “would you rather me tell you or show you?”

“show me,” yeri whispered.

you grinned. nevermind that you’d barely slept. you always had more than enough energy for yeri.

in a matter of seconds, you somehow mustered the energy to throw yeri’s legs open, just after slipping her panties off her legs. she was full of attitude, but when you went to spread her apart, you almost couldn’t fathom her being so pliant.

when you noticed that she was already significantly wet, you fought a chuckle. there was no way in hell she got this aroused merely from touching your legs. little did you know, even you getting a little too close to her could do more ungodly things to her body than she’d rather admit. it was embarrassing.

especially when now, with your tongue flitting around her clit, was the very first time that you had ever paid her any mind. yeri was so used to being ignored by you. it was her biggest dream for you to see her in the same context that she saw you, and her biggest fear for you not to. not that she had to worry about that anymore, but that was exactly what had her head spinning in disbelief.

rather than toss her underwear into oblivion, you kept her panties balled in your fists, noting that they were baby pink. fitting, you thought in amusement.

yeri could’ve moaned at the sight of you with her panties in your inescapable palms and your head craned between her legs. it was likely that she did. you wouldn’t have been able to tell the difference between all the other contented sounds escaping her mouth as her thighs quivered, sensitive.

you, on the other hand, were amazed by her sensitivity. all it took was lapping at her clit and it was as if her whole body was coming to life, sparks flying every which way. she was already so responsive, arching into the air. she refused to keep her body still though it was obvious it was beyond her control, unable to decide whether or not she wanted to lean in for more or shy away in vulnerability.

yeri called out your name, whimpering out a shaky, “fuck.”

the sound of her labored breaths and blissful sounds had arousal gathering between your own legs, but with the treasure presented squarely before you, you weren’t inclined to react. all it did was make you even more relentless with your tongue, sucking at her bundle of nerves.

while you tongued her clit, you drove two fingers inside of her hole, feeling her pussy no longer throb around nothing as its grip tightened at your digits. yeri whined, thinking it was too much stimulation, not that she would ever admit it.

holy fucking shit, this feels so good. goddamn, yeri thought, her whole mind going numb. what she couldn’t say in between her desperate sounds was jumbled around in her brain.

she understood why there were always loud, high-pitched cries coming from this room at night. yeri wasn’t stupid, she understood that your so-called guests were random hookups she didn’t care to know how you’d met, but she didn’t realize you were this mind-blowing at sex. she should’ve known.

to feel one of your hands clamping her thigh while you went down on her was something she used to only be able to dream of. and she had dreamed of it, no less, but the combined skill of your tongue and fingers exceeded the threshold of her expectations. you were far too good for her to ever ever think of returning to a life without this kind of pleasure.

whether you liked it or not, she was a permanent stain on your life now. you weren’t going to toss her away when you were done and had gotten what you wanted like you did every other woman. if she had to do anything and everything to grab your attention, it would just have to be that way.

little did she know, you had always wanted to have a taste of her. you just didn’t want her to feel obligated to have sex with you strictly because you took her in. obviously, she had never been alone in her feelings, you just weren’t aware that they were genuinely reciprocated.

you changed her life for the better. you took her from a human-sized cage to a mansion filled with every amenity she could’ve ever wanted, spoiling her rotten. and you knew that she was grateful, but all you expected for your generosity was appreciation, not favors.

yeri had made it clear that her affections for you went deeper than that though. she obviously appreciated your wealth and her wings fluttered in thrill whenever you surprised her with a new item, much like they did now, but there was something about you that piqued her curiosity. any other affluent person could have bought her, those were the only that could afford fairies at the ridiculous but understandable prices they were being sold at, but they could have been a jerk.

not you. you always made sure that she was taken care of and had everything she needed. you didn’t use her for entertainment like every other fairy feared they would be. you didn’t make her feel like a pet.

“don’t stop, don’t stop, don’t stop,” yeri chanted, sensing her orgasm sneaking up on her.

the pressure building in the pit of her stomach increased tenfold. somehow, you became even more merciless, eating her out like you wanted to break was left of her. and in a way, there was some truth. whatever you wanted to do to her, yeri was inclined to allow you.

her eyes rolled to the back of her head, so much heat tensing in her thighs. whatever amount of energy you had yeri returned back to you, vigorously rocking her hips into your mouth while her hands latched onto your hair. she had every intention of getting off and you were going to bring her there.

“gonna cum,” yeri announced, gripping the sheets for purchase. “gonna cum, gonna cum, gonna cum.”

you said nothing, only pulling out all the stops to finish her. you badly wanted to make her orgasm, watch her release on your tongue like it was the last time. every bone in your body ached for this moment.

with a couple more passings of your tongue over her clit, yeri’s orgasm knocked the wind out of her whole being. she couldn’t breathe for at least a whole minute, her body moving at its own accord, his thrusting angrily into her mouth as the rest of her convulsed and a scream ripped from her throat. it was the most aggressive orgasm you had ever seen and you were proud to say that you were the root.

yeri arched off the bed and cried out, tears flooding her eyes, until she finally went limp. her eyes were winced closed, lips open, struggling to seek breath.

“holy fuck,” yeri exhaled. “holy shit. holy fuck.”

you nearly snickered, but remembered why this was happening in the first place. “next time you have a problem, let’s just address it, please,” you said levelly, standing to your flat toes. “i prefer solving things over fussing over them.”

considering your definition of solving things, yeri was in no place to contend. “yeah. let’s do that.”

now you laughed. you had no idea what you were going to do with her.

#yeri smut #red velvet smut #tw: noncon #(but not really)#gxg smut #girl group smut #revehae fics

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