#writing this reminded me of like. 3 separate specific incidents.
Text
How to actually get people to try TTRPGs other than D&D
I've probably said most of this stuff separately, but here it is all together. This was originally even longer, and way more satirical, but honestly, while it was very funny, I think just a straight shot is what's called for.
The long "in defense of D&D" toll you must pay first as it's crucial to understand why so many efforts fail:
The popularity is a feature.
Yes, there is a reason it has the name recognition it does, and yes, that reason is capitalism; this post explains that far better than I ever could. You do need to go about this assuming that you are not going to personally end capitalism tomorrow, and even if you did, more people would be familiar with D&D than any other TTRPG, and 5e would have a number of materials geared specifically towards new players. Pretending this isn't the case will not help you.
Switching TTRPGs, particularly to anything that vaguely resembles D&D in genre, theme, and character creation, requires obtaining materials, finding a group (possibly even a GM, and those are thin on the ground), and learning a new system. This takes significant time, effort, and possibly money. That's often ignored. More importantly, people will have emotional attachments to the games they like. I've found that often, the "hook" in posts encouraging people to leave D&D is when WoTC does something sketchy. However, as a lot of players and creators in the industry pointed out recently, if someone already owns all the D&D content they need, they can sustain a boycott and have no need to switch; and what's more, when someone is considering other games not to better meet their gameplay needs or to expand their horizons, but because they feel cheated, the last person they want to hear from is a gleefully circling vulture.
So if you're reading this and saying "well then, where's my opportunity? when do I pounce?" the answer is "if you are thinking of introducing people to new games as an opportunity to pounce and poach rather than a warm welcome, I feel incredibly sorry for you, and you will probably alienate more people than you attract."
Anyway, onto the actual mechanical merits of D&D. It is a flexible system. It is not infinitely flexible - it has many limitations - but a lot of other systems are even narrower in scope, not broader. D&D can be rules-heavy, but RP is largely open and, barring charm spells, I control my PC, which I vastly prefer to games that will tell me how my character feels. It accommodates a wide range of play styles, from very loose to very crunchy.
D&D hits on a particular balance of strict, though often streamlined mechanical rules for combat and abilities, and wide-open freedom for character personality and agency, which is very appealing to many. In fact, a common complaint I've seen from D&D players about other systems is that they are rigid and overcomplicated in the areas where they want more freedom and ease, and too loose in the places where they want structure. This doesn't mean those systems are wrong or bad! It does however mean that they are not a natural fit for people who genuinely enjoy D&D as a system.
Also, just to get it out of the way: I (and a lot of D&D players I know):
strongly dislike games that regularly just tell you how your character feels, mechanically
Feel that D&D handles mixed successes in a way that feels rewarding for the player and which moves forth the narrative
Feel that D&D has, in the base PHB form, a manageable (ie, non-overwhelming) number of classes/subclasses and races such that you can start people off simple and then those with experience can explore other resources.
In other words: games with mechanics that regularly tell you what your character's emotions are instead of letting you choose through open RP? Games where nearly every success comes with a serious consequence? The 20+ classes of Pathfinder before you even get into archetypes? Not always a selling point! In fact, often a drawback for people coming from D&D! which brings me to the first real point:
Listen to the person you’re trying to convince before you recommend anything.
This doesn't apply if you're making a "hey! this game is cool!" post in general, provided you're actually focusing on said game's own merits, but if you're trying to interact with an individual or a group, you have to personalize it.
First, think theme. This should be obvious, but I have had people recommend survival horror when I've asked for farcical mystery, so it needs to be said. Many TTRPGs - I'd even argue most, and that includes D&D - have pretty significant genre expectations, and so you should be matching those to the interests of the person you're talking to.
This also goes for tools and mechanics! Having a virtual character sheet or dice rollers (for example) isn't terribly important to me, but some people do want the support of these tools and that should be taken under consideration. Don't tell someone who is primarily playing remotely to try to play Dread; don't tell someone looking for a system that supports character advancement over time to play Honey Heist. Again, seemingly intuitive, but you'd be surprised at how often people ignore the entire content of a request simply to hype their favorite game and in doing so harm that game's perception.
The person you're interacting with is a human with preferences, not a faceless proselytizing target. This is about them. It's not about your favorite game. It's about the game you think could be their favorite game.
A crash course will do wonders.
A crash course isn't as immediately attention-grabbing as saying "this is/isn't just like D&D," but it is actually useful. This is why actual play is such a powerful tool for encouraging people to play games - they can see an example. I'm the kind of person who does read a rulebook cover to cover, but this is still useful, because games can come off as far more intimidating or finicky on paper than they are in play. Understanding common player shortcuts and rules as intended vs. written is pure gold in terms of being convincing.
(For what it's worth: I do think it's important to read the rules once you've gotten the gist from actual play. I'm not a fan of "rules by osmosis." However, I think having crash courses or actual play examples are an important part of making people decide it's worth investing the time and often money involved in obtaining the game and reading the rules in the first place.)
If there's a free quickstart guide, an actual play episode or one-shot, or any kind of succinct but reasonably thorough introduction to the game, start there. Disseminate it. Put the rules in someone's hands and say "if this is interesting to you, join us!" and let them make their decision.
Don't sell a fixer-upper
(This also goes for D&D players talking mechanics - it's a community-wide problem to be sure.)
If you don't know of a game that fits someone's needs? Admit it. Point them towards people who know more about the TTRPG landscape, but my god, do not tell them "well, you can learn another system, and then immediately start hacking it with twenty add-ons and house rules before you have any fluency." It's okay to not know! It's even okay to say "I don't know something that achieves all of X, Y, and Z, but you might like this game, which is really good at X and decent at Y out of the box." Again: change is hard. Change that requires even more effort than usual is harder.
Are you trying to convince people to change, or are you trying to convince them to stop?
Shame is useful when you want people to stop doing something, or do something that doesn't require continued interactions with those yelling at them. It's useful to get people to stop making off-color jokes. It's very bad for getting people to join your community. (It's very good for making people leave your community).
This is especially true with TTRPGs, which do not have to be a zero sum game - we all have finite amounts of time, but people can and do play multiple games. And so again: do you genuinely want people to play your favorite game? Or do you just want to get them to stop playing D&D? Would you be welcoming to someone who runs alternating one shots or mini campaigns in both systems, or is it more important to you that they not play D&D, even if that means they never give your favorite indie creator a dime? And if it's the latter...what does that say about you?
In summary:
My general experience in TTRPG spaces as a D&D player has been, honestly, that many indie players are less interested in getting D&D players to join them than in getting D&D players to stop playing D&D. In my admittedly spiteful case, this means that there are a few TTRPGs I truly will not check out because I've found the online community to be far too unpleasant for it to be worth my time.
I'm well aware those people are not representative of all players. I'm sure there are many lovely players. And, for what it's worth, while I would never do something as invasive or obnoxious as going on other people's posts or worse, into their inbox or DMs to berate them for saying they dislike the game I play, I'm sure there are people who have come across my posts and said, for whatever reason, "I don't want to play with her."
I think D&D does have a certain amount of leeway in that it is the predominant game, for better or for worse, and so it's much easier to find the voices you enjoy and drown out those who don't, whereas there are indie games where one single person has been my sole introduction to it, and they have immediately fucked it up by making that introduction to it in the form of being incredibly obnoxious. Again: it's not fair. I'm not pretending it's fair. But it is the reality.
So it's worth checking to see if aggressive evangelizers in your own community are actively making your favorite game seem more unpalatable. You will do more good by getting them to cut it out than by promising the people they're bothering that not all of you are like that.
If you're interested in hyping up a game, then I'd focus on making posts about why it's good - not why others are bad; capitalizing in a positive way on popular shows branching out into other systems (eg, TAZ's BitD and Monster Hunter campaigns and dips into Urban Shadows; D20's Kids on Brooms or Good Society hacks; the CR and RQG one-shots of your choosing); and providing crash courses and fun, easily navigable paths to playing it.
#writing this reminded me of like. 3 separate specific incidents.#anyway! hopefully this is useful#long post
136 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hiii!! Ok idk if this is something you even want but, I feel like you’ll either like this and know how to write it or have rly good recs. (But like don’t feel pressure to do either of those, I respect your time and interests!)
Have you seen any ‘Steve is tortured + aftermath but it’s Modern AU’ fic around???
Like he stumbles into the wrong scenario at the wrong time and is captured and accused and tortured for information he doesn’t have. And then the feds or whatever finally rescue him but because of how secret the organization is and all that ‘sweep it under the rug’ business, they just make him sign an NDA and send him on his way so he just has to like?? Survive?? In the real world with like no support??
Insert Eddie catching him in a panic attack or something and helping him put his life back together and he gets Robin and the kids to help to and it’s all love and happy endings!
This is a cry for help I’m dying for Steve!Whump rn and that boy deserves for his season 3 trauma to be recognized!!!
!! hello dear one! i have a few recs for you! i am gonna put this under a cut tho because the ask itself is already pretty long.
The Library of Engineering, Mathematics, and Sciences by Eddies_ArtofSuffering
WC: 86k || Rating: M || AO3 Link
Summary: Steve and Robin move out of Hawkins and go to college after the Starcourt Mall incident. For the next three quiet years, Steve and Robin work at the main library - but to Steve’s utter disappointment, they get separated when Steve gets assigned to the newest branch of the school library, built inside the School of Engineering, Mathematics, and Sciences. It’s obviously subpar without Robin by his side, but the range of students that come in isn’t all that much different than the main library, and it’s still the same old boring job for Steve. Until, one day, Eddie Munson comes in.
Or, Steddie college AU that no one asked for.
My Notes: i literally sent @/steddieficfind an ask for this fic because i was looking for it the other day and they were so helpful in finding it for me. this is the closest fic to your ask that i’ve read, the others in this list aren’t modern aus so i hope that’s okay.
—
A Hedge of Brier Roses by APuckish_Wit
WC: 43k || Rating: T || AO3 Link
Summary: They win.
After months of planning, and skirmishes, and learning to work with and trust (to an extent) the allies that Owens and Stinson swear they can work with and trust, they win. They make it out of the final confrontation with all their people alive and accounted for. Vecna will never hurt anyone again. The Upside Down is sealed away, and they are all free. They win.
And they lose.
Because one of their own didn't make it all the way back. And now it's their turn to take care of the person who's always taken care of them.
My Notes: i read this when jt originally came out and thanks to @sailing-through-hawkins, who reminded me of its’ existence, i am currently rereading it. it’s such a good fic w angst and a happy ending!
—
the aftermath (as documented by eddie munson) by ikarakie
WC: 20k || Rating: T || AO3 Link
Summary: a look into the effects of the upside down on steve harrington, through the eyes of his boyfriend, eddie munson. (and the one time it has effects on eddie, too.)
5 + 1
My Notes: i’ve read the whole series before, and it’s such a lovely one to read. this part specifically goes into the aftermath (obvi) of what steve specifically goes through. can be read as a standalone, but i definitely recommend reading the whole series! (also thank you to sails for helping find this one)
#wjdbshs i hope this is what you wanted lmao#i recruited sails because i *suck* at searching for specific fics#they were extremely helpful in finding some fics for you#steddie fic rec#steddie#steve x eddie#steve harrington#eddie munson#unsteddie answers#anon ask
15 notes
·
View notes
Note
Different anon here! I have a character who's blindness is incident related, but it's been several years since then and the story isn't heavily focused on his trauma (or at least that specific trauma, as he has others that aren't related to blindness)
This was before I knew injury-based blindness was a harmful/potentially harmful trope though, so now I'm worried that I'll have to rewrite his backstory entirely to avoid writing about experiences I don't have, or pushing any harmful tropes that are already pushed far too much.
What do you think? Could I still use that as part of his story without focusing too much on that specific traumatic event, or do you think it's better for me to discard it entirely?
The Accident Narrative/Going Blind Through Trauma trope and How to Make It Better - (I’m just calling it that because I don’t know if this thing has a name)
My problem with this trope - and the problem many people have with it- is very specific. I’ll try to break it down for you so it is easier to understand. My problem is basically with the execution.
Characters go blind unrealistically often from traumatic accidents in media. Mainly because it creates a lot of drama, which is fair, if cheap. It is also a good story starter if the story will be about them being all sad that they’re blind. These stories usually focus heavily on the blind part rather than the trauma part, and they paint blindness as the worst thing that can happen to anyone. Including death. Sometimes the character grows out of this feeling and sometimes they don’t.
The way you portray this is what changes the narrative.
I like that your story takes place several years after the incident although how well it is done will depend on the portrayal of the resulting blindness. Blindness can be tough, but avoiding considering the incident a tragedy that ended his vision could help. Not having too much of a woe-is-me attitude toward it will also help. Starting the story years after the incident creates beneficial distance.
With this in mind, the story won’t be - about - him going blind and then adapting and possibly being sad, possibly not sad about it. That would be a type of story that is probably best left to blind people who lost their vision later in life. Your story avoids this issue by starting the story well after the incident occurred. When you said you didn’t want to write about something you hadn’t experienced, to tell a story that wasn’t yours to tell, this is what you want to avoid. If you aren’t writing about going blind/being blind, you’re good, at least for this question.
So, you have avoided writing about the experience of going blind (and having that be the focus of your story) and starting the story at another time so your character can have some distance from his trauma. Your story will not be showing your character tragically losing his sight and learning to adapt. -dramatic sniffle-
The other part of this ask that really works for me is the part about focusing on different traumas. It sounds like the character is going to have more to them, and the idea of the Blindness Trauma being not as significant as other more recent traumas sounds good and true to life. It also takes the focus away from any implications of blindness as particularly tragic and all-encompassing. Your character will expirience different things just as anyone else would. Focusing more heavily on other things in his life is a good idea. That, coupled with the distance from the initial traumatic incident makes it okay with me.
What else can you do?
Here are a few other options for you or other readers who are writing incident-related blindness:
1. Have them focus on the traumatic incident itself rather than the resulting blindness.
Yes, going blind can change your life. It can be scary and someone may need to grieve their vision loss as they would any other major change. However, this doesn’t have to be the dramatic take-up-an-entire story thing either.
If you decided to write flashbacks, you can show the character mostly dealing with trauma, with blindness as a reminder of it. This puts the focus on the traumatic incident itself healing from trauma rather than trying to heal from blindness. When sighted people write about this, it comes out as awkward, not relatable, and impossible to separate voice-type things - like worrying about never being able to marry - from the authors own opinion or worries about blindness.
Focusing on the trauma of say, extreme injury can help with that. It is important to make a distinction for the reader, who usually goes in not knowing much about blindness and conceptualizing it as one of the worst things that could happen to them. Make it as clear as you can that the character is upset due to trauma rather than being devastated their life is over because they are blind.
2. Have the trauma happen off-screen / have them not remember it much due to young age
It sounds like this is also what you’re going to do. You could mention the traumatic incident briefly, without too many dramatic details. A few descriptive sentences should be enough. You could write it for reference and only take a few samples from it you liked. This keeps the focus away from drama for drama’s sake. It also disrupts the usual narrative, putting you farther away from the Accident Narrative or trope. You could simply have had the character be too young to remember much detail.
3. Add more blind characters
This one is good for any story. You should always trace your logic for topics like the one you presented or consider how to do things better, but one easy way to avoid readers thinking all blind people are like your character (which they might), you can add another blind character or more who were born blind or went blind at a very young age. Who don’t struggle with being blind generally. This exposes your readers to more ideas of blind people.
When your story is standing on the line between nuanced character and meeting a stereotype, you should absolutely have at least one other if not a few blind characters. In fact, I would be surprised if a story like this didn’t have other blind characters and, if I were reading this story randomly, I might even feel less forgiving or open to what was different about the Accident Narrative this time.
Thank you for asking this question. It is kind of challenging to answer and I had to rewrite this a few times. Basically, you want to do what you can to disrupt the usual portrayals of blindness because there are actually so few and most are made by people who aren’t blind or even disabled. You cannot make this trope or stereotype go away, but you can try to shake it up. Because this can be done differently, to avoid writing about adapting the tragic blindness, I am ok with this type of story.
I don’t know if this one is harmful exactly, but it is frustrating to see and can certainly lead to some harmful ideas, such as blindness only being tragic even when someone was born blind. I have a review coming up for a book called Blind that might be helpful, as well as a post called Tropes I’m Tired Of that I hope will help. Your ask definitely helped me consider more ways this trope could be made more bearable and concentrate on what exactly I dislike about it.
All that said, this is not a post encouraging people to use this narrative in all their projects. Only if you feel like it is necessary and fits the character. I would like for this trope to be less common than being born blind or going blind in a way that isn’t so dramatic and, possibly, abrupt. When most characters go blind through traumatic accidents it contributes to people’s idea that blindness is not only traumatic for anyone at any age, but also cannot be anything but a tragedy.
I really hope this helps. Of course, I would really encourage a few different sensitivity readers with this story. Just to get different perspectives. There is another blind person who also offers sensitivity reading at @sensitivityreaders and it might help to get them or someone else, in addition to me. Because I would love to read this sometime.
-BlindBeta
#ask#anon ask#blind#blind characters#writing blind characters#blind people#writing#accident narrative
223 notes
·
View notes
Text
Ichinose Clan Theory — The meaning behind Guren’s crest
I already talked in a post that I recently made about how Kagami used the prestigious Tokugawa Clan as a reference for the Sangū Clan:
https://distinguished-slacker.tumblr.com/post/652605760110542848/sang%C5%AB-clan-theory-the-meaning-behind-mitsuba-and
However, while doing this research I randomly happened to find a clan that could be the reference for the Ichinose Clan:
That is the Saitō Clan (斎藤氏). The Saitō Clan was a Japanese samurai clan from Echizen Province, Fuku Prefecture. This family ruled over the Mino Province, which bordered the Owari province that I mentioned in my previous post. Saitō Dōsan was a powerful warlord who married his daughter to Oda Nobunaga, who was Japanese “daimyō” (a Japanese magnate or feudal lord) and one of the leading figures of the Sengoku period. Oda Nobunaga was one of the "Great Unifiers" of Japan along with Tokugawa Ieyasu and Toyotomi Hideyoshi. However, Saitō Dōsan and his son Saitō Yoshitatsu were defeated by the Oda and died in 1564. Saitō Yoshitatsu’s son was known as a drunkard who was unable to govern and was defeated by the same Oda Nobunaga three years later. As a consequence, the Saitō clan disappeared in 1567. It sounds similar as to how the Ichinose Clan lost their prestige.
But why am I sure why the Saitō Clan was used as a reference for the Ichinose Clan?
This is because of Rígr Stafford who refers himself as ‘Saitō’ and who coincidentally happens to have a relation with the Ichinose Clan as seen in Volume 2, Chapter 1 of the Resurrection at 19 Light Novels:
Although it wasn’t Saito who initially created the Ichinose Clan, as it was Sika Madu who created the whole Mikado no Oni, and so the Hīragi family and the 10 branch houses serving under them, it was indeed Saito who was the perpetrator of the incident that happened 500 years ago that caused the Ichinose Clan to separate from Mikado no Oni, form Mikado no Tsuki, and become “pariahs”. Moreover, as it is mentioned, similar to how Sika Madu insterted his own cells inside some members of the Hīragi family (or possibly all members in all generations since 1200 years ago), Saito inserted some of his own cells inside an Ichinose Clan member 500 years ago, and so all of his descendants, including Guren, still contain these cells inside their bodies to this day. This means that if Sika Madu is the God and creator of Mikado no Oni, then Saito would be the God and creator of Mikado no Tsuki.
To further support this claim, let’s have a look at the crest of the Saito Clan:
Doesn’t this shape remind you of the pendant that Guren wears at the center of his uniform collar?
There has been some discussion over the years when it comes to guessing what actually the shape of Guren’s pendant is; some people said it is a Sun while others say it is a cherry blossom flower. But what if it’s neither of them?
First, the ones who claim it’s a Sun is because then it would complement the Hīragi Clan Moon pendant, more specifically Shinya, as Shinya’s name means “midnight” while Guren is called the “Sun” more than once, acting as foils to each other. However, if you have a closer look at it it’s hard to completely affirm that it’s a Sun because the circle is way too small in comparison to what the Sun rays would be and the five division of the rays resembles more a flower.
Here come the ones who claim it’s a cherry blossom. This is further supported by the use of the cherry blossom in OnS. When Guren attended Shibuya First High School for the first time, the cherry blossoms were in their blooming season, which is March/April. Also, in volume 14 of the manga, Mahiru happens to be seated on top of a cherry blossom tree with Guren behind her, and some people have theorised that the cherry blossom represents Mahiru because the flower symbolises the fleeting nature of life, as Mahiru “died” when she was only sixteen. There is also the fact that people assume it’s a cherry blossom because it’s one of the easiest flowers to recognise. But let’s have a look at how a cherry blossom actually looks like:
The edges of real life cherry blossom petals are really smooth, and no matter what cherry blossom “Sakura” symbols you look at on internet, the petals always have this particular rounded, slightly pointy with an inwards triangular cut at the middle edge shape. But the petals of Guren’s flower emblem are way too rough and irregularly shaped to belong to those of a cherry blossom flower. Then, to what flower it belongs to?
This flower is the Nadeshiko flower Dianthus superbus or the fringed pink or large pink. As you can see, it has five petals which have rough edges like those of Guren’s crest. One of the regions this flower can be found is in Japan and it occurs at high altitudes, up to 2400 m. This reminds me of how Guren’s home is mountainous. But putting that aside, some fans of Japanese culture might recognise this name from the ‘Yamato Nadeshiko’, which is the personification of an idealized Japanese woman. According to this ideal, this woman has to feminine, poised, gentle, humble, patient, honest, charitable, benevolent, chaste and devoted to her husband, always submissive to him, dedicated to the family, bonus points if she looks weak, delicate, with pale skin and long, straight dark hair, preferably black. So then, who does fit this role?
This is no one but the Ichinose girl who lived 500 years ago. In this panel taken from the Catastrophe at 16 manga, you can see how she has very long dark hair, and the way she gracefully holds the fan gives the idea of a sophisticated and feminine woman. Saito even calls her an “alluring girl”. Then it comes the idea of weakness and care for the family. The poor girl was one of the victims of Saitō’s plans and a victim of rape at the hands of the first Hīragi son as an act of jealousy because said girl chose his younger brother, the second Hīragi son. This girl in the end had the baby, who was accepted by the second Hīragi son, even if it wasn’t his son, and these three lived as a family after. However, they had to live a life of humiliation, being so powerless even to their last breath. Furthermore, the idea that the Yamamoto Nadeshiko name belongs to the Ichinose Clan in the OnS world, is that Mikado no Tsuki remained very traditional in comparison with Mikado no Oni, still living in a traditional Japanese mansion, wearing Japanese robes and being given a traditional education. The most obvious proof of this is how Sayuri, a member of Mikado no Tsuki, was raised by her family to fit these roles to serve Guren appropriately, as seen in the afterword that she appears in:
So in conclusion, Guren’s crest represents the Nadeshiko flower. Of course I could be wrong, and it could be either the Sun or a cherry blossom but I think it’s worth to mention this other option as I haven’t seen anyone else write about it. There is also the possibility that it doesn’t have to be only one flower. Saito was the one who planned the meeting between the Ichinose girl and the two Hīragi sons 500 years ago. 500 years later, the same Saito plans the meeting between the Ichinose son, Guren, and the Hīragi girl, Mahiru. Maybe the flower that represents the first meeting is the Nadeshiko flower and the second meeting is represented by the Sakura flower (cherry blossom). The Nadeshiko flower symbolised the kindness but futility of the Ichinoses in the past and so became their crest but maybe the Sakura flower, which also has connotations about fragility but at the same time represents time of renewal, may indicate that this time the Ichinose clan (or what remains of it) will be able to finally break their chains in this era.
I hope you liked my theory! :3 I swear I only began with researching only about Mitsuba, but then somehow I made a theory about the Sangūs, and then somehow I ended up with a theory about the Ichinoses, which lead me to the topic of Guren’s crest. What a chain of events😅
P.S. My GureShin heart is suffering right now guys🤧
#owari no seraph#guren ichinose#rigr stafford#catastrophe at 16#resurrection at 19#ichinose guren catastrophe at 16#ons#seraph of the end
74 notes
·
View notes
Note
If you're still taking requests, do you think you could write Varian coming out as trans to Hugo? 🥺👉👈
(this is rambly and it doesn't do ur amazing prompt justice, but here you go love! <3)
ao3
Rapunzel is the first person he ever tells.
It’s before...before everything. They’re not even that close, but Varian feels that they’re on the cusp of something, with each smile she gives him and a friendly arm over his shoulder.
It’s not like his ill-fated crush on Cass or his embarrassing idolization of Eugene that he’s really trying to tone down. If not for his raccoon companion, he’d say she’s his best friend, despite their yawning age gap and the fact that Cass is her best friend.
It’s not until much much later--a promise broken and promise kept later--that Varian identifies it for what it is.
He’s never wanted an older sister, but it seems he has somehow acquired himself one.
But before that, before everything goes to hell, he tells her. It’s an awkward conversation--Rapunzel having been sheltered her whole life just blinks at him uncomprehendingly for a few moments while his face reddens.
“Oh,” she says. “So you used to be--”
“Yeah,” he rubs the back of his neck self consciously. “But I’m not--inside I’m different.”
Rapunzel’s expression clears. “Okay,” she says, instantly accepting his weird explanation without hesitation.
Something frantic settles in Varian’s chest.
______
Eugene and Lance find out in typical Eugene and Lance fashion. AKA, they accidentally unleash a spell on the kingdom that causes all born-males to immediately fall into a cursed sleep. This leaves Rapunzel and Varian--the only two other people locked in the tomb where the inciting incident happens--to figure out exactly how to reverse the affects.
A little bit of magic here, Varian reciting an incantation, and Rapunzel’s fiance and best friend are back, no worse for wear.
“Wait, but you didn’t go into trippy, magic, dreamland,” Eugene says, squinting down at Varian.
Varian offers a shrug, blush climbing up his cheeks. “Yeah, well. Apparently your dumb spell doesn’t think I’m a guy.” He tries not to feel sour about it.
Something visibly clicks behind Eugene’s eyes. He ruffles Varian’s hair in response, grinning lightly. “Ah, ah, the spell is specifically for people with-ahem-male genitales. Nothing to do with non-male-genitale-carrying guys.”
“Weirdest combination of words you’ve ever said, but you’re right,” Lance agrees. “Don’t get your head in a knot over some magic spell that was invented by old-timey dudes, kiddo.”
Varian lets out a relieved laugh, feeling lighter than he has in a while.
______
“Oh,” Hugo says, blinking rapidly. He reaches one hand out and stops, body language stuttering. It’s a far cry from the usually confident boy Varian is used to putting up with. He tries to transition out of the aborted motion by reaching up to run a hand through his tangled blond locks.
Varian keeps his expression as neutral as possible, ignoring the pain in his jaw from the nervous clenching. “If you’re going to judge--” he begins, voice tight.
Hugo shakes his head quickly. His eyes are wide. “No! I wasn’t-I was just-” He swallows, eyes darting around, landing on everywhere except Varian. “I was just surprised.”
The only response Varian gives to that is an annoyed huff. He snatches his shirt off the chair and quickly yanks it over his head, mind already racing between the possibility that he might very well have to dropkick Hugo down a hole and the fact that it’s been four days since they were separated from Yong and Nuru and he really needs the other alchemist to navigate their way through Bayangor.
“So are we going or what?”
____
Their journey through the city is exactly as chaotic as Varian had expected it to be. It reminds him of a few months ago, when they’d journeyed through the City of Light. The air had been hot and the streets so crowded it was a sea of color and movement. Yong and Nuru had elicited to stay on the outskirts, bargaining with fishermen and farmers, but someone had to enter the city and find the pawn shop detailed in Ulla’s diary.
Unfortunately Varian was the only person who could actually decode the thing and Hugo was the only one of their group who’d actually been in the city, so the two had reluctantly set off. Varian barely remembers it--the crowds were fairly disorientating--but he does remember Hugo being kind of an asshole about everything.
Which is really weird, because now they are in a similar situation--navigating through a busy, unknown city without their group--and Hugo is being strangely...considerate?
It’s pissing Varian off.
“Are you gonna be weird about this?” he demands through gritted teeth, turning on his heel to face Hugo.
They’re both standing in an uncrowded area of the market, just a few paces away from an alley. It’s private enough that Varian doesn’t feel nervous about bringing up the topic. Just annoyed that he has to.
Hugo blinks a couple of times rapidly. “What?”
“I’m not a girl. Stop treating me like one.”
Hugo’s face turns red. “That’s not-I didn’t mean-I-” his tone comes out panicked. One hand runs through his wild blond hair, making it stick up in the back. “Me too,” Hugo blurts out suddenly, bringing Varian to a standstill.
His turn to blink up at the tall blond. “What?”
Hugo shifts awkwardly from foot to foot, looking everywhere but Varian. The back of his neck is red. “I mean...I wasn’t born-we’re the same,” he gets out. Everything in his expression is a study of vulnerability--a new look for Hugo.
Varian’s trying to decide if he likes it. He thinks he does.
“Oh,” he says, realization dawning. “Oh.”
“Yeah,” Hugo lets out a relieved huff of air. “So like. I’m not judging. There are a million things to make fun of you about, but that’s not one of them.”
Varian simultaneously wants to punch Hugo and hug him. He settles for lightly whacking his arm. “Thanks,” he says dryly, but knows that Hugo can hear the gratefulness in it. “I appreciate the sentiment.”
Hugo’s lips twist into something like a grin. “I’m sure you do, Stripes.” He tosses an arm over Varian’s shoulder, guiding him back through the crowds. “Now stick close, I don’t want to lose you.”
Varian rolls his eyes, biting out a witty rejoiner that Hugo deflects with his usual brand of smarminess. As they continue to bicker through their journey, Varian feels a subtle shift in their relationship.
Varian didn’t trust a lot of people. Hugo was either too trusting or didn’t trust anyone--Varian was still trying to figure out which. But the strange camadrie of sharing a secret with someone--a secret of such weight and importance--has somehow changed everything.
It’s a change that Varian likes.
41 notes
·
View notes
Note
hey babe! i got recommended your blog but was disappointed to find out you misunderstood cc boundaries. i’m just here to remind you that ranboo is not okay w x reader or reader insert fics! i would highly recommend looking at @smp-boundaries they have most popular creators and keep them updated for the most part!
Hey there! I've thought long and hard about this discussion long ago before I even started writing so here is my perspective on it: (sorry it's quite long, tl;dr provided)
First, this is my main reference on writing for Ranboo (this clip) which talks about his boundaries on writing, the general no nsfw and legal reasons of being a minor. This is, as far as I know, two or three months after the 'x reader on tumblr' incident with Tubbo, which is what was considered by smp-boundaries as 'being uncomfortable'. By that period, Ranboo stated, that those are his boundaries 'as simple as that' (this fanfiction boundaries he set had been repeated by him time and time again without change and he said that it is his boundaries with anything).
Unless he had specifically addressed anything that bans 'x reader' content (because by the span of the clip and the discovery of that content he could have said something), I genuinely believe that these platonic and no-shipping fanfictions are on the safe area at least.
Safe, as I specify it, because I follow to the t of all the boundaries specified in his Twitter alt that he has pinned. I am more up to date with that boundary list because it is 1) acknowledged by Ranboo, 2) up to date, and 3) I don't discourage the smp-boundaries to be inaccurate, but there are periods that they addressed that they have been inactive, so I went with the safer option. (which doesn't mean that I don't know or read the smp-boundaries masterpost because that's the first thing I did), and 4) the clip and boundary on fanfiction pretty much states that he is okay being written so long as he is not sexualized, shipped, or anything that counts as NSFW.
I also don't mean to dismiss the fact that Ranboo does not want to view 'x reader' content of himself, but if he truly had qualms about it he would have addressed it by now. It's like those boundaries on things that they allow to exist so long as they do not see it themselves. So my point here is that: I will be following the boundaries on fanfiction that Ranboo has explicitly stated unless he finally addressed it otherwise.
I'm happy to be recommended and I'm sorry if I had made you uncomfortable. Most of the questions regarding my fanfiction about Ranboo had always been in the clarification of the genre (platonic) and you were the first one to reach out to me about Ranboo fics in general, so before this I am under the assumption that I am well within bounds. Thank you for reaching out and I hope you understand that I mean Ranboo and his character no harm, as he seems to address separate boundaries for this.
tl;dr Ranboo has reiterated even after the tumblr incident that his boundaries on 'anything' is that it should never be invasive, should not be NSFW, and should not cross the fact that he's a minor. (his boundaries do not change even if he's a legal adult unless he states otherwise) And as far as I'm aware, no shipping boundaries, both cc/c/between characters/x reader, had been violated. If there has been an instance that Ranboo addressed a boundary on reader insert fics specifically, I would like to see it, thank you.
#mine:lapiz#about:writing#sorry for the long post#I hope this made sense since I've been under the weather for a while now
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
I Knew It Was You | Jungkook One Shot
Pairing: Jungkook x Reader
Requested: Anonymous:
“A wolf college au where yn and jk are both the popular students but they’re not really acquainted with each other? theyre actually mates but they dont know that yet. Their friends always hint that theyre basically so compatible with each other and so they start to develop feelings for each other. One day, yn was in her wolf form just hanging around the forest and she met jk’s wolf whom she didnt recognize and they ran and played together. So, theres this other girl who likes jk and tries to make a move and kisses jk but jk immediately rejects her but yn was hurt when she saw and like jk could feel it through their mate bond? and they eventually confess and well realise theyre mates and start dating :D also like soft smut scenes in between especially when they finally officialized their mate bond :) also, jk is the alpha of his pack and is usually cold to outsiders and hes typically only soft for yn :D”
Genre: Wolf au, College au, Fluff, Smut
Length: 9,029k Words
Warnings: Strong language, Underage drinking, Drunk-con, Smut, oral sex (female receiving), fingering, vaginal sex.
A/N:
1. My first ever request! Thank you so much!!! I hope it is the first of many ;D.
2. First time writing Wolf AU, I kinda just made some stuff up...actually I made a lot of stuff up, but who doesn’t.
3. Thank you for being so specific and creative, it really helped. I hope I did it justice.
4. P.S. Listening to Dance For You by Beyoncé on repeat kind of inspired the last bit.
“Is there a reason why Jeon Jungkook is staring at you right now?” your best friend, Camille, whispered in your ear from the desk behind you during class. Your gaze shot up from your notebook and focused straight ahead, processing what she just told you. Your eyes then drifted to the desk, that you knew very well, positioned five rows to the right of you, where Jeon Jungkook was indeed looking in your direction. Once your eyes met, his eyes suddenly wandered down to his own notes, a devilish smirk could be seen on his perfect lips. You did a double take because you couldn’t believe it yourself, but the proof was right there, he had definitely been caught staring. You couldn’t help, but chuckle to yourself. You quickly shrug in Camille’s direction to answer her question, down playing the encounter that made your heart skip a beat.
“Mmhmm.” You heard her unconvinced hum from behind you and chuckle at her meddling behavior. As soon as the professor announced the end of class Camille, of course, was hounding you about the incident.
“So did I miss something, or did something happen between you two?” You look at her in confusion. “No, nothing happened.” You say as you continue to pack up and head home for the day.
“Well, why the fuck not?” She asks animatedly.
“Um, maybe because we don’t know each other.” You throw out with a laugh.
“Of course you do. You guys go to the same parties, I’ve seen you talking. You even have some mutual friends.”
“Well, yeah, but that’s about it, isn’t it? Other than that, we just share a class together.” You tell her as you both walk outside of the building.
“Okay, fine argument, but you realize that’s not the first time he’s been caught staring at you?”
“Everyone stares at me, Camille. They stare at you too. It’s because we’re fucking beautiful.” You smile at her and she can’t help, but smile back at the compliment. “So no, I didn’t notice.”
“This is different Y/N and you know it.”
“I don’t know anything.”
Just as you spoke, Jungkook came into your view walking on the path that intersected with yours. A classmate you know as Crystal was walking beside him, her words falling on deaf ears as Jungkook was not paying much attention to her. He looked up and you locked eyes again. His blank and cold expression was replaced with a warm smile and he even went so far as to wave at you. You hesitated, but quickly lifted your hand and waved back. Before you could warn him, Jungkook collided with a student on his path because he was looking at you and the cold expression was back again. By now you stopped walking and just watched the scene play out.
“Watch where you’re going, yeah?” he grumbled at the boy. The opposite student was speechless and hurried off without an answer. Jungkook looked back up at your slightly shocked expression and a quick look of regret flashed across his face before he took off in a fast walk, Crystal struggling to keep up with him.
“But this isn’t different?” Camille asked with almost perfect timing. You glare at her before continuing your walk. “No. It’s not. And if it is...so what?”
“So what? You’re hot, he’s hot. You’re both popular, you would be so good together. You know you guys have more things in common than you think. Jimin told me he loves singing and video games, too! Everyone on campus would be so jealous.”
You stop in your tracks once again, realizing what Camille wasn’t saying.
“Are you and our friends trying to set me up with Jeon Jungkook behind my back?” You ask seriously. Camille froze, her head snapped up and her eyes widened like a deer caught in the headlights.
“Um...not in so many words.” You raise your eyebrows at her accusingly and she breaks. “When you put it that way it seems bad, okay—”
“Don’t bother.” You offer as the two of you begin to walk again. You actually began to feel a sort of pull towards Jungkook recently, but ignored it because: “He seems like a bad boy type anyways.”
“Why don’t you find out for yourself? I hear he’s not actually like that and you never know, you might like it. You’re nineteen and you’ve never even had a boyfriend before.”
Because a werewolf girl dating a human boy would never work.
“Thanks for the reminder Camille, I’m aware.”
“Look, you’re going to the basketball house party this weekend right? He’s gonna be there. Why don’t you give it a chance?” Her question is only met with silence.
“At least talk to him. Get to know him more. And then you can judge for yourself.”
“Fine. But only because you won’t leave it alone and he is really hot.” You finally gave in. Camille laughed and shouted in triumph. “Thank you. I just want you to find some happiness, you know? And who knows maybe he’s the one.”
The weekend has finally arrived and you really needed a break from studying and work so you dressed to impress and came ready to have a good time at the basketball house on Saturday night. As you approached the house, the many drunk bodies on the porch all greeted you by name, whether you knew them or not, they were all very excited for your and Camille’s arrival. It was the team's captain, an upperclassmen named Yoongi, who opened the door to the house and welcomed you into the crowded living room. “Y/N! Camille! You’re here!” He drunkenly shouted, making both you and your best friend laugh. “Hey, Yoongi! How’s it going?” You asked him, having to talk directly into his ear to be heard over the music.
“Great! Let’s get you girls some drinks though! Have whatever’s in my fridge ‘cause I love you guys and if you run out of booze, come see me.” He walked you both to the kitchen with his arms around your shoulders.
“I’m sure that won’t be necessary Yoongi, but thank you anyway.” Camille said, giving Yoongi a kiss on his cheek. You did as Yoongi said and helped yourself to whatever closed, untouched beverage caught your eye in Yoongi’s fridge and once you felt just tipsy enough, you and Camille hit the makeshift dance floor and grabbed everyone’s attention as usual. After a few more songs and a few more drinks you were feeling a bit beat and suddenly wanted a place to lay down that was quieter. Seeing as you were separated from Camille and weren’t in the position to use the best judgement right now, you decided to travel upstairs and find a nice bed to fall into for the time being.
You stumbled through the wide hallways of the house and settled on the third door on the left. You swung the door open, laid eyes on the large freshly made bed and prepared to flop belly first on top of it, but you noticed a person sitting in an armchair near the window. You straightened yourself up as much as you could at the sight to realize it was Jungkook.
“Hi.” Your hoarse voice spoke quietly.
He wore an expression of pleasant surprise and cleared his throat before speaking. “Hi.”
You shook your head in embarrassment and scrambled for an excuse. “I’m sorry, I didn’t think anyone would be in here. Yoongi usually says the second floor is off limits.”
“Then why are you here?” He asks playfully.
“We’re good friends and I thought he wouldn’t mind.” You play off innocently. “Why are you here?”
“Same.” Is all he said before a silence came over the two of you.
“Well, sorry again. I’ll just go.” You go to leave, but Jungkook stands and reaches in your direction.
“Wait!” He said. You step back into the room again and face him. “Stay.” He said hopefully.
“Why should I do that?”
“Because these parties are not my style and I could use someone to talk to.” He settled with a smile. The pull you felt for him was making itself known and at this point you couldn’t leave now even if you wanted to.
“Okay.” You shut the door, make your way to the bed and face him. Once you were closer to him, you got a proper whiff of his scent. There was the pleasant waft of fabric softener and his expensive cologne, but the coaxing aroma of cedarwood and lavender practically called to you in a refreshing and comforting way. You couldn’t for the life of you begin to understand the feeling, but if being this close to Jungkook brought it on, then that’s what you would do.
“So, if these parties aren’t your style then why do you always come to them?” You ask curiously.
He sat back down in his chair and took a swig from his beer. “Because my friends come and I have nothing better to do on a Saturday night.” He flashed his bright, perfect teeth and you let out a nervous giggle.
“Seriously?” You asked, not knowing whether you believed that answer. “You’re not even with them, you’re in here by yourself.” His smile slowly morphed into a thoughtful line and he let his head fall to stare at his fidgeting fingers in his lap.
“There was no one there that I wanted to see.” He said quietly.
“But there was someone up here that you wanted to see?” You said sarcastically with a laugh.
“Well there wasn’t before, but there is now.” He looked up with a timid smile and your breath caught in your throat for a split second. You cleared your throat and decided to change the subject due to how warm your insides suddenly became. He doesn’t seem all that bad, maybe you should actually get to know this guy.
“So, while we’re here, avoiding the rest of the world, maybe we could...get to know each other better. I feel like we barely talk.” You offered, following through with Camille’s request. You were suddenly aware of how heavy your head was. Your weighted eyelids dropped and the world went dark before Jungkook was suddenly back in your sight once more, looking pleased with your previous words. It was obvious you were still pretty intoxicated and needed to carefully monitor what came out of your mouth.
“Um, okay. Yeah, uh...what kind of music are you into?” He laughed at his own question, probably thinking it wasn’t interesting enough. But music happened to be your favorite thing to talk about.
“Oh, I listen to everything. I am lacking a little country and heavy metal on my playlist, but I’m sure it’ll pop up sooner or later.” You shrugged.
“So you’re, like, legit.” He gathered his thoughts aloud.
“As legit as they come.” You responded, earning a laugh from Jungkook. The sound was enough to warm your insides ten fold. The two of you went from one topic to the next, sharing your likes and dislikes. You were being respectful of each other's opinions, but the playfulness was still in full effect. Jungkook even moved from his chair and joined you on the bed to sit beside you so that your knees were touching and your legs dangled over the side.
“You can’t honestly sit here and tell me that Far Cry: Primal is better than Far Cry: New Dawn.” You accused, genuinely shocked.
“That’s exactly what I’m telling you.” He defended.
“Well—No! Just no. New Dawn’s gameplay and story is so much better.”
“That is a lie and I won’t stand for it.” He crossed his arms and put on his most serious face.
“Oh yeah? And what are you gonna do about it?” You bated him, leaning forward so that your faces were closer than before. You couldn’t justify your actions, not hardly. All you could think about was Jungkook’s irresistible scent filling your nostrils this entire time and clouding your judgement. Along with the alcohol of course.
Jungkook’s eyes flickered with understanding of your new intentions and his eyes moved back and forth from your lips to your alluring eyes before he too shortened the distance between you. He reached out to cup your cheek and you instinctively leaned into the warmth of his hand. He guided your mouth to his and it felt like a flame was ignited inside of you when your lips touched. Both of you released small moans of pleasure while exploring each other’s mouths. Hands began to wander and you could feel Jungkook guiding you onto your back as he climbed on top of you, your lips still connected. You ran your fingers through his soft hair and let out a whimper when he began to suck on the skin beneath your ear.
His hand glided up your torso and stopped carefully over your breast. He lifted his head from your neck to look into your eyes. “Is this okay?” He asked barely above a whisper. You quickly nodded your heavy head. You had never experienced anything like this, but it felt good and natural so who were you to refuse? You had to admit you were pretty excited about how this night was turning out.
Jungkook continued to fondle your breasts through your shirt and kiss you breathless, the two of you slowly grinding into each other all the while, legs tangled together. Your skirt riding up as you ground your heat into his jean clad thigh, instinctively seeking your own pleasure from him. To your disappointment, Jungkook pulled away to press his sultry lips to your exposed torso while making meaningful, heated eye contact with you. As if he were asking permission to keep going lower. You didn’t need any convincing. Jungkook was so intoxicating and you were so turned on that you didn’t want to say no to him. You wanted to experience what all your friends already have and spoke so highly of so you nodded at his silent request.
He only looked back down and rolled your skirt up to your waist in response, revealing your black joe boxer panties. He caressed your thighs before gently pushing the fabric to the side, his breath wafting over your core and sending a chill up your spine. He spares one more heated glance at your eyes before licking a delicate stripe against your clit causing your breath to hitch and your body to jerk slightly.
“You taste so good.” He suddenly rasped. All you could do was nervously giggle and cover your face out of embarrassment. His kisses and licks against your sensitive clit turned rougher and more driven so that your back was arched and your hands were fisting the sheets of the bed.
You were a moaning mess at his mercy and your head swam with alcohol and the pure bliss that came from Jungkook’s mouth. The feeling of flying. He suddenly inserted a finger inside of you, only adding to the white heat surging through your veins right now. You instantly place your hand on his head and give his shiny hair a gracious tug. He then moans into your clit at the feeling making you lose it even more.
He adds a second finger and moves his hand even faster while he continues to eat you out like a man possessed. “Oh, f—sss. Jungkook.” You whined, feeling your abdomen and your muscles tighten around Jungkook’s fingers. You knew your orgasm was fast approaching and you were desperate for Jungkook to give you what you needed.
The pleasure Jungkook was giving you was too good to be true. This was the kind of thing you only thought you could experience with your future mate. Your eyes suddenly shot open and you were thrown out of your euphoric stupor. You shouldn’t have let this happen, you should have been strong enough to resist temptation to save yourself for your soulmate.
But it was too late, your orgasm slammed into you with a force that knocked the wind out of you. You forgot how to breathe and your whole body tensed with violent waves of pleasure. You let out a broken cry and unknowingly clamped your legs around Jungkook’s head, who was still very persistent in his actions, hands and tongue never letting up through your orgasm. You had to pry him off of you once you got too sensitive to take it anymore.
“Jungkook, stop, stop, stop, stop.” He finally got the message and sat up again. Your juices covering his mouth and chin, which he wiped away slowly and smeared on his jeans. You both attempt to catch your breath, you especially, before you wordlessly adjust your panties and fix your skirt. You then positioned yourself at the edge of the bed beside Jungkook as you were before.
An awkward silence hung between you before Jungkook spoke.
“Did I do something wrong?” He asked, looking down. Your head whipped in his direction at the query.
“What? No! No. That was...amazing. I just..I guess I just wasn’t expecting all that. It was my first time.” And you’re human.
“Oh, I’m sorry. I thought...we don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do.” He reassured you. You let out a heavy sigh and grind your teeth at his words.
“Thanks, but...I don’t think we should do that anymore. Or anything like that.” You all-but whispered. His eyebrows furrowed and his head cocked to the side in confusion.
“Wait, w-why? I thought—”
Because, sadly, you’re not my mate!
“I just think maybe we might be better off as friends. I’m really sorry about this.” You said as you hopped off of the bed and put your shoes on while he sat frozen in one position. You place your hand on the door handle and open it before stopping and risking looking back at him in this state.
Not knowing what else to say, you said “I’ll uh, see you in class on Monday. Bye” and closed the door swiftly, scurrying down the stairs and rejoined the party.
Monday came sooner than you had hoped and you weren’t ready to face Jungkook. You met up with Camille for lunch in between classes at the café. While you ate, you kept thinking about how you would have to man up and soon because you spotted Jungkook enter the café and without meaning to, you locked eyes with him. You froze, but held eye contact out of fear. Whatever he did next, you deserved for what you did last night, you thought. To your immense surprise, Jungkook dropped his permanently cold gaze, smiled a friendly smile and waved at you. You didn’t waste anytime smiling and waving back, hoping that last night wouldn’t get in the way of your friendship.
He made his way to the register and ordered. He leaned against the wall of the waiting area and pulled out his phone in the meantime. He’s keeping his distance, that makes sense, you thought whilst checking him out. While you eye his figure from across the room, you didn’t notice your best friend eyeing you from across the table. You only had eyes for him in that moment. You didn’t try to conceal your staring even as he made his way to the exit. He smiled and nodded in your direction again on his way out and you smiled sweetly back.
“Okay, did something happen between you two or am I blind? ‘Cause I know it’s not the last one.” Camille asked eagerly. “And where did you run off to during the party? I never asked.”
You snapped out of it and faced her once again. “Well, I got to know J.K. like you said.”
“J.K.?! Are you guys on a nickname basis now?” She exclaimed frantically. You glared at her, sending her a message to lower her voice.
“Yes, he said I could call him that. We met up in one of the bedrooms at the party and we talked. Turns out you’re right, he’s not so bad.” A warm smirk graced your face at the memory of your conversations.
“I. Fucking. Told. You. Don’t forget to thank me at the wedding. Never mind, I most definitely will be thanking myself. No need to worry.” Camille babbled.
“Well, you don’t need to worry because I ruined it before it could even be…an it.” You frowned, aimlessly pushing your salad around with your fork.
“You wanna tell me what you did this time?” Your best friend rolled her eyes at you from across the table.
“We may have kissed—”
“You did what?!”
“Calm down and let me finish!” You whisper-yelled causing her to attempt to gather herself.
“We talked and then we kissed and then we were on the bed and...he may have eaten me out.” You say that last bit at a slightly lower volume.
“WHAT?!” Camille shouts, causing almost every head in the café to turn to her. “Camille, you need to calm down, okay?” You say, not actually giving her a choice this time.
“Okay, okay. I’m sorry, but what?!”
“Yeah, that happened and it was amazing, but it didn’t exactly end well.”
“Why? Did he...did he try to force you?” Camille leaned in. Her voice was definitely lowered now.
“No, nothing like that. He was sweet. I just—I ended up leaving because...it didn’t feel totally right. I mean it felt right, I just, I got the feeling that he wasn’t the one.”
“So you gave up good sex? Boyfriend or not, anyone would kill to have their first time with that guy. Especially that Crystal chick that’s obsessed with him.” The thought of Jungkook with another girl sent a pang of anger through you, but you wouldn’t let Camille see that. It was over, you didn’t belong together.
“Yeah, well no one said anything about murder. Anyway, I backed out, it’s fine. I’ll find my soulmate someday, I’m destined to.” Literally.
“Hey, well if you’re good, I’m good. Now quiz me. I have an exam later.”
Thanks to your encounter with Jungkook, your following class was a lot less awkward than you thought it would be, but you felt the need to apologize one more time.
When class was over, you told Camille to leave without you and you waited outside for him.
“Jungkook.” You called when you saw his mop of hair leave the classroom among the other heads. His eyes found yours instantly and he approached you.
“Hey, Y/N. How’s it goin’?” He asked with a sunny disposition that you could see right through, now that you were face to face.
“I’m good. How about you?”
“I can’t complain.”
You nodded, looking for the words to say. “I just wanted to apologize again for Saturday. And thank you for not treating me like dirt today. I really shouldn’t have done any of that.”
He laughed lightly. “It’s all good Y/N. No hard feelings. You just know what you want and if you only want to be friends then that works for me. I think you’re a great girl and I just wanna know you.” He admitted genuinely. You were touched, but you were almost bothered by how okay he was with everything.
“That’s really sweet J.K. Thanks. I’ll, uh, see you around then.”
“See ya.”
Well that was way too easy.
Despite all of your attempts to expel your Jungkook from your thoughts, the boy and his sinful mouth wouldn’t leave your mind. You begin to wonder if you’ve made a mistake with the whole friends thing and it seems there was only one thing left to do. Finally you decided to hunker down and call your mom.
“Hey, sweetie! How are you?” Her bell-like voice flowed into your headphones.
“I’m good, I think. I just called ‘cause I have a question. About our kind.”
“Oh, I’m all ears, shoot.”
“H-how do you know you’ve found your mate?” You sputter the sentence quickly, hoping you wouldn’t have to repeat it.
“Oh, honey. Are you seeing someone? And you didn’t tell me?”
“No, mother. It was just a question. Don’t get ahead of yourself.”
“Mmhmm. Tell me about him first, then I’ll answer.” You sighed, realizing you had no choice.
“He’s really nice, and funny and good looking.” Your mother giggled over the phone. “But we only shared a moment. I promise, it’s nothing major. That’s my issue.”
“Well, it’s not easy to put into words, but I’ll try. It’s like realizing everything you’ve done has led up to that moment. The moment you meet. It’s like gravity is pulling you towards that person, but you do go willingly to them. All you can see is that person and you would do or be anything that they needed you to be.” This all sounded familiar, but there was one thing missing.
“And they definitely have to be a werewolf too, right?”
“Of course, you know that. And sometimes you can’t even tell they’re your mate unless you meet their wolf. It’s rare and stupid, but I’ve heard stories and I don’t make the rules.” You laugh at her word vomit and continue to catch up properly.
“Things have been just a little stressful over here, but nothing I can’t handle.” You told her.
“Well when’s the last time you stretched your legs?” You tried to think back to the last time you actually let your wolf roam free and you couldn’t remember. “I don’t even know.”
“Well, do! Go down to that creek we found the last time we visited and just run, but make sure no one sees you.”
“Yeah, I’ll do that. Thanks mom.”
“Of course, sweetie. I love you.”
“Love you, too. Night.”
You finally found time in your hectic schedule to get away to the woods near the creek you talked about with your mom. You told Camille you were visiting your family last minute so you wouldn’t be back until Sunday afternoon, giving you a solid day and a half to yourself and getting back in touch with your inner animal. You parked your car on the outskirts of the woods, grabbed your backpack full of clothes and necessities and made your way into the trees.
You found a good spot deep enough into the thicket and far enough away from the trail that you were sure you wouldn’t be seen by humans. You hid your backpack in a few bushes and readied yourself for the transformation.
Even though it’s been quite a while it’s like your wolf knew exactly what to do and you were a light gray, seven foot tall werewolf in no time. You could smell all the scents in the forest. You could hear the trees and the moving water from the creek. But you couldn’t hear any people nearby so you knew it was time to start running.
You dug your paws into the soft ground, admiring the natural earth before dashing off into the woodland. You felt free of all the worries you came here with and found yourself forgetting all about midterms and professors and projects and you could just be yourself.
You suddenly stopped on a dime when a familiar scent caressed your nose. Cedarwood and lavender. It was extremely potent and had the collective smell of the forest woven into it, making it one hundred times more appealing. Without your permission, you immediately took off in pursuit of the scent and knew that you wouldn’t stop until you found it. It was calling to you after all, you felt you couldn’t ignore it.
The closer you got to it, you could hear another set of paws pounding at the earth moving with the same urgency as yours. You thought to stop out of fear of making an enemy, but it wasn’t up to you. You had no free will at this point, your wolf had to find the source of this scent.
Your body finally stopped when you came to a clearing, face to face with another wolf. It was dark brown and slightly taller than you. Your body immediately makes itself slightly smaller from the amount of confidence that exudes from the dignified looking wolf. He must be his pack’s alpha, you thought. You both stared at each other from across the clearing and that’s when it happened. The words of your mom from before flood your mind at the sight of the brown wolf in front of you. He’s the one, you thought. Once again your feet begin to carry you to him without much thought and the brown wolf does the same.
You meet in the middle and neither of you hesitate to get familiar with each other’s scents and nuzzle the other, marking each other with that scent as well. You continued this show of affection with your new mate, rejoicing in the fact that the wait was over and you’ve finally found the one you're destined to be with for the rest of your life.
You are interrupted when you feel a large, wet tongue run up the side of your face. You open your eyes to see your mate with his front legs stretched out in front of him with his bum in the air and his tail wagging back and forth quickly. You understand that he wants to play and you assume the same position, waiting for his next move. Seeing this, he took off into the woods and you instantly chased after him.
It took longer than you were proud to admit, but you finally got close enough to tackle him to the ground and the two of you sparred playfully, rolling around on the ground and pinning and nipping at each other. You both carried on like this; chasing, playing and nuzzling until the sun went down and came up again and you tiredly walked back to your backpack in the bushes with the brown wolf on your heels.
Just as you reached your belongings, you heard the footsteps and voices of two hikers. Without thinking, you took off into the forest, as did your mate, but in the opposite direction. You made sure you couldn’t be seen by the hikers and watched as they walked by. But you knew even though they were gone, it was dangerous to be back out in the open at this time. Two humans was enough to cut your roaming time short. Your mate obviously had the same thoughts as you couldn’t smell his scent nearby anymore.
You shifted back into your human form and got dressed in the bush. Cursing those hikers for scaring your mate off, you got in your car and headed back to campus. You didn’t know when you were going to see him again. The thought depressed you, but you promised to be back next weekend at the same time and tried to stay positive as always. “Back to writing papers and dealing with dealing with dickheads again.” You lamented.
As if this week couldn’t get any worse, Camille was sick; meaning you would have go to class and eat lunch and dinner alone, and Jungkook is no longer answering your text messages. He decided you were a shitty person after all, you thought on your way to the local café for your lunch break. As you approach the wall length windows of the café you can see Jungkook sitting at a table right against it with Crystal. Well, there’s your answer right there, you thought venomously. You stop and just watch the two, wondering why this was such a devastating sight when you’re not mated to Jungkook and you’re the one who made him look ridiculous.
As you were standing there looking like a total weirdo and feeling sorry for yourself, Crystal reached across the table to cup the cheek of an oblivious Jungkook and kissed him on the lips. Your eyes widened in horror and your jaw dropped. The betrayal, no matter how unworthy you were of it, felt like it speared a hole through your chest. You didn’t understand why you were ready to collapse in complete agony over someone who didn’t belong to you, but regardless it felt like he ripped your heart out and stomped it into the ground in front of you.
Jungkook pulled away almost immediately with a look of disgust on his face and turned to face you instantly, as if he knew you were there. You locked eyes with a stunned Jungkook and took off without a second glance. This was awkward enough, you didn’t need to confront the situation.
Without warning you begin to feel this crippling guilt and anxiety, even though you didn’t do anything wrong. At least you didn’t think so. You’re distracted by your sudden rush of emotions when you hear Jungkook call your name from behind you. You glance at his desperate, running form before facing forward and continuing on your way. Wherever that was, you didn’t exactly know yet.
He was faster than you thought because in the next second he had his hand on your shoulder and was turning you to face him.
“Y/N! Wait, just wait a second. Let me explain okay?”
“Why? What do you have to explain to me? We’re not together.” You finally admit.
Jungkook cocks his head to the side and squints his eyes in confusion. “How can you...do you not remember?” He asks desperately, needing an answer.
“Remember what? The party? Yeah, all too well.” You say ashamedly.
“No.” He said firmly before thinking aloud. “Was that not you?” He nearly whispered. With your enhanced hearing, you heard clear as day.
“Was what not me?” You were starting to get a little annoyed now.
“Do you not feel that? That pull?”
You look at him, floored. “How do you know about that?”
“Have you had any emotions that weren’t yours recently? Strange feelings at least? I have. I could, I could sense you back there—”
“Okay, what? How do you know that?” You asked, getting overwhelmed. There’s only one way he would know a thing like that, but it couldn’t be.
You allowed him to slowly lean in and take an audible sniff at your neck. “You still have my scent from Saturday.” He said in a satisfied tone of voice, causing you to freeze.
He continued. “And oranges and rosemary.” Another sniff. “And red oak.” It was all starting to make sense. Lavender and cedarwood. You could suddenly smell it all over him, igniting all your senses. He pulled back so he could look you in the eyes deliberately.
You looked back with a new fire behind your eyes. You were too blinded by anger to realize that your mate was standing right in front of you. “I knew it was you.” You said softly before throwing yourself into his arms. He laughed freely, wrapping you in his strong arms.
“You had me doubting myself for a moment.” He said into your neck.
“I’m sorry. It won’t happen again.” You pull him into a heated kiss to seal the deal of officially finding your mate and it feels like nothing you’ve ever felt before. But then you’re reminded of why you were in a mood to begin with. You part from Jungkook and slap his shoulder.
“Why didn’t you answer my messages? I thought you were mad at me.” He pulled his phone out of his pocket to show you. “I got a new phone. My contacts didn’t transfer and I wanted to talk to you in person after this past weekend. Took me all of Sunday to put it together, but I finally figured it out. Thank god one of us did.” He said teasing you. You slapped his arm once again. “I wanted it to be more romantic than this obviously, but I guess we can thank Crystal for that.” He said looking up apologetically.
“Don’t worry about that, if she tries it again I can handle her.”
“Then let’s get out of here, boss.” He wraps an arm around your shoulders and walks back in the direction of the café.
“Don’t call me that.”
“Okay, my sweetest darling.” He replies.
You cringe before you speak again. “Better, I suppose.”
He laughs loudly. “I could get used to this.”
“Oh, spirits, What have you gotten me into?” You ask the sky jokingly.
You enter the café and Crystal is still sitting and waiting patiently in the same spot. Her eyebrows raise at the sight of his arm around your shoulders.
Jungkook stands in front of the table and reaches for his wallet while Crystal watches attentively. Jungkook put some money on the table, said goodbye and the two of you left the café once more. You could see her wide eyes and embarrassed, flushed cheeks through the window as you walked away. Jungkook didn’t look back and that brought an impressed and touched smile to your face.
“I’m thinking this calls for a celebration. What do you say to skipping class for the rest of the day?” He asked, placing a kiss on your cheek for...incentive?
You think about it. You only have one more class left, Camille wasn’t here to tell you not to and this was pretty worthy of celebration. You finally found your soulmate and you absolutely adore them. It was a good enough occasion for you. “You know what? Fuck it. Let’s skip.” You say with a huge carefree smile. “Whoo!” Jungkook howls with excitement.
“Alright my lady. How about I actually take you to a way better lunch than the local café?”
“Like on our first date?” You ask sheepishly.
“Exactly.” He says, stopping in front of you on the sidewalk. “Y/N, will you go on a date with me?”
“I mean, I don’t know. I just saw you kissing some other girl, what’s that about?” You fake cringe. Jungkook sighed and closed his eyes.
“Please don’t do this to me.” He begged, making you laugh.
“Of course I’ll go on a date with you.” You grabbed his hand and you both took off in search of a restaurant that suited both your tastes.
He took you to an Italian restaurant nearby, which happened to be your favorite. “Oh, yeah, Jimin told me you liked it once.” Jungkook said when you mentioned it. You laughed at how naïve you’ve been these past few weeks.
“I still can’t believe our friends really tried to set us up together.” You laughed across the table from him as you waited for your food to come.
“Haha, yeah, I guess they knew something we didn’t. Man, we really were late to the party.”
The following three weeks consisted of you and Jungkook making up for lost time and spending time with each other as much as you possibly could. You found out that Jungkook is actually the alpha of his pack, which includes his room mates, Hoseok and Taehyung. They weren’t psyched you were stealing Jungkook away from them all the time, but it was necessary. It made for a true honeymoon phase as your wolves craved the presence of their mate constantly.
You got excited when he invited you anywhere, both of you knowing that you would always accept. This was partly because your wolves desperately wanted to mate with each other and that fact made you incredibly nervous at times. Thankfully, no matter what form you were in, there was nothing forcing you to do anything, but the feeling would always be there, especially when you were together.
Despite a close call in your dorm room, you both had gotten pretty good at ignoring it as you weren’t ready for that step and Jungkook was perfectly fine with waiting. You figured it would happen when it was supposed to and when it did, it would be perfect because every experience with Jungkook was. You just wanted to spend as much time as you could together before the semester ended.
As you both had a test coming up, Jungkook invited you to his campus apartment to study. You jumped at the opportunity to spend the day with him and get some extra help in the course. You both sprawled all your materials on his king sized bed, that you were incredibly jealous of, and sat on opposite ends just focusing on your respective flash cards.
Both of you would ask the occasional clarifying question or make a joke to break up the tension in the room. You were always comfortable with your mate and vice versa, but the air had taken on a fervent energy that you both noticed. After a while, you began to sweat slightly even though the temperature in the room was perfectly cool. Your eyes glance up at him and away again; you wonder if hanging with Jungkook in his room with his perfectly comfortable bed was the right way to go, especially after what happened last time. Jungkook cleared his throat, getting your attention, which was laser focused on the notebook in front of you to avoid thinking about him taking you on this bed.
“What do you say to a little study break? I’m starting to get a little burnt out over here.” He offered, fanning himself with his shirt.
“Oh, yeah, me too.” You agreed.
“I’m gonna break out those snacks you brought.” He said getting up and walking to his desk where you left them, stealing a kiss on your cheek on his way there. You smile down at your lap as your heart skips a beat. His sweet behavior still gets a reaction out of you even after all this time spent together and you relished every moment of it.
Jungkook fetched some chips and candy for the two of you and sat in front of you tailor style. You talk about school and make plans for next weekend when Jungkook leaned forward and placed a kiss on your lips. You felt your body temperature rise and that intense need that you’d grown so familiar with in the past few weeks appeared again with a new ferocity.
Your body leaned right back into his and you savored the kiss before cutting it short, not wanting to lose control. You dropped your head and shook it apologetically. He rubbed your arm comfortingly and gently grasped your chin in his hand, tilting it up to look into your eyes. “Hey, it’s okay.” He uttered.
You look back into his dark brown eyes, wondering what you did to deserve a mate like Jungkook. How blessed you were to end up with someone as generous, charming, respectful, caring, sexy and talented as him. He never failed to act like a complete gentleman towards you and always let you know just how much he loved you, whether it was through words or eye contact or the way he caressed you.
You wanted to show him how much you appreciate him, how much you were legitimately dedicated to him and that you wanted nothing more than to be with him for the rest of your life just as he has. You wanted to show him how much you truly care for him, how much you understand and value what he has to say, how much you love him. You wanted to show him how good he made you feel that first night at Yoongi’s party.
But you allowed your inexperience and fear of the actual event to hold you back from this stage in your relationship that you both obviously wanted. Why am I so afraid? You thought to yourself. Still lost in Jungkook’s eyes and his touch, your need for him was bordering on feral and growing stronger by the second due to the close proximity.
What am I afraid of? We’re literally destined to be together, we both love each other, we’re basically mated for life anyway. Why not make it official? Your thoughts raced around in your head as your eyes fixated on Junkook’s soft lips and your body subconsciously inched closer to his. Your breaths were becoming heavier and more noticeable with the silence in the room.
Something in your mind clicked and you were on him in a second, wrapping your arms around his neck and feeling his lips on yours again. Jungkook obviously had zero complaints as he wrapped his strong arms around your waist and returned your less than gentle attack on his lips with just as much passion. You climbed into his lap, your body seemingly on autopilot as you rocked your hips back and forth on top of him slowly causing Jungkook to grunt into your mouth. He lets out a small moan when your mouth finds his jaw and travels down to the side of his neck. Without warning, your canines extended and grazed Jungkook’s skin; a sign that your wolf was ready to claim him as yours for life.
You realized what you had almost done when Jungkook separated your mouth from his neck and looked into your eyes carefully, searching for any traces of regret most-likely.
“I’m so sorry,” You rasped out. “I didn’t know I was—”
“It’s okay.” Your mate assured you, placing a hand on your cheek and rubbing his thumb against it tenderly. “It’s more than alright. I just...Is this what you want?”
You nod firmly. “I love you, Jungkook. I want this.” You said softly, playing with the silky hair at the nape of his neck. He nods, searching your eyes for doubts for the last time then you were kissing again. This time, you had no intentions of stopping. Jungkook clumsily pushed all of your notes and materials off of the bed with one hand before helping you to straddle him as he lay down at the head of the bed.
“Oh, I love you too.” He added quickly against your neck. You giggle at the insertion and grab his face in your hands, forcing him to look at you.
“I know, dummy.” You whisper gingerly before pressing your lips to his, hoping that he could sense the passion and desire you felt for him in this moment. He smiled fondly against your lips and got to work on your shirt and bra, vocally praising your body all the while.
“You’re so beautiful, Y/N.” He muttered into your skin, hands caressing your entire body.
You get rid of his offending shirt and toss it behind you without a care in the world as Jungkook’s six pack has stolen all of your attention. As your hands explored the expanses of his newly exposed body, your feral nature returned. You and your mouth made the leisurely trip from his neck to his navel, gladly eliciting the occasional moan from Jungkook.
When you reached your destination, you helped him remove his pants. But before you could attempt to take off his boxers, he flipped you so that he was on top and immediately began planting kisses all over your body making you squirm in the best way.
“Jungkook, please.” You whine after he removes your bottoms.
“Don’t worry baby, I’m gonna make you feel good.” He breathed directly onto your center, causing you to shudder slightly. Your underwear joined the graveyard of clothes littering the hardwood floor when Jungkook spread your lips and lightly ran his tongue along your clit. You couldn’t help, but gasp and twitch at the brief spark of electricity that his actions brought. He held your thighs open to accommodate his head while holding your hips down right before dragging his tongue against your clit in a much more aggressive manner.
Your hand instantly covered your mouth out of shocking pleasure. “Oh, fuck.” You mumbled against it. Your eyelids slowly fluttered closed as Jungkook continued to lap at your clit vigorously. It got harder to breathe as he carried on, pulling all kinds of sounds from you, both human and nonhuman. You finally thread your fingers through his now sweaty hair and grip it so that you could properly grind into his face. You could feel his extended canines grazing your flesh occasionally and the idea turned you on further.
“Oh my God, yes, Jungkook.” You moaned, sensing that your climax was well on it’s way. He suddenly slid a finger inside of you, grazing your g-spot, causing your back to arch immediately. “Oh my God, just like that.” You groaned as He inserted another long, thick finger into you, scissoring them this time.
“Oh, that feels so good, please don’t stop, baby. Please make me cum.” You babbled in your lust filled stupor, hoping that sweet release would come soon. Jungkook focused on finding your g-spot repeatedly and never letting up on your clit, his face was literally buried in your pussy as if he didn’t need air to breathe. The sight in itself was enough to set you off. Your legs shook as you silently came all over your mates face.
When it got to be too much you finally let go of the breath you were holding and let out a short shriek. Jungkook finally came up for air, continuing to scissor his fingers inside of you to make sure you would be stretched enough for him. He kissed you immediately, allowing you to taste yourself on his tongue and lips, but you didn’t mind one bit.
He separated himself and withdrew his fingers from you to remove his own underwear and find a condom. As he made his way back to you, you sat up and reached for his hard member in your second attempt to pleasure him, but you were pushed back on the bed for Jungkook to situate himself in between your legs.
He took your chin in between his fingers and stared deeply into your eyes keenly. “We got the rest of our lives for that, but right now, I need to be inside of you.” He growled from deep within his chest, sending even more wetness between your legs. You only nodded showing you understood, sensing that Jungkook was in Alpha mode and just submitted yourself to him, allowing him to do what he wanted to you.
He brought you closer to him, kissing you breathless while lining himself up at your entrance.
“Are you ready?” He asked, making heated eye contact, his hand supporting the back of your neck to keep your foreheads pressed together.
“Yes.” You whispered with no hesitation at all. Jungkook inserted himself into you slowly, savoring the divine feeling of your velvety walls wrapped tightly around his cock. You on the other hand were trying not to let it show how much pain you were in. You felt every inch of him stretch you out, but the kisses that Jungkook peppered all over your face distracted from the pain.
“You okay?” He panted, placing a kiss on your ear.
“Yeah.” You decided after the pain dissipated. “Why do you have to be so big?”
“That’s just what the spirits blessed me with, babe.” He laughed.
“Just shut up and fuck me.” You breathed seductively, reaching down and grabbing his bare ass in your hands, pushing him into you at the new found pleasure.
You both let out a satisfied grunt and Jungkook continues fucking you at a slow pace, both of you savoring the moment for as long as possible before you both grow impatient and frankly ravenous.
Jungkook kneeled upright on the bed, his muscles rippling and covered in a sheen of sweat, his face contorted in pleasure above you. He guided you onto his cock at a rapid pace with his strong arms and hands gripping you at the waist, sure to make bruises in the near future. You couldn’t care less about the rest of the world around you, let alone bruises as you stare up at the glorious man above you in awe and adoration. You were both grunting and growling as you chased your highs together. Your inner wolves are nearly satiated from all these weeks of torture, it was so close you could taste it.
“Fuck, Jungkook, I think I’m gonna cum.” You rasp as you fist his sheets so hard that you think you heard a tear.
He bends down to your ear and growls, “Let go, baby. Come for me. Only for me.” in the most beautifully fucked out voice you’d ever heard and you were seeing stars. You held his waist as close as possible to you with your legs and your eyes rolled back into your head at the amount of electricity running through your veins. In the midst of your mind shattering orgasm, Jungkook attaches his mouth to your shoulder and bites you, marking you as his mate, adding to your pleasure. Your body shook uncontrollably and you could swear you saw white at one point.
As you were coming down, Jungkook’s thrusts were getting dicey and irregular, giving you a sign that he was close. You grip his face and stare into his eyes passionately.
“That’s it, babe. You fucked me so good. Only you make me feel so good. Now come for me, baby. Give it all to me.” You whimpered.
“Ugh, fuck, Y/N!” He shouted. You felt his dick twitch inside of you and you bit him on the shoulder as he came inside the condom, causing him to groan loudly and gaining you some extra thrusts toward the end as he was coming down.
The two of you go on to kiss all over each other’s lips, faces and necks lovingly in post-coital bliss until eventually he rolls off of you and you lay side by side under the shredded covers, just staring up at the ceiling. Or so you thought. You turn your head to find that Jungkook is staring at you and you turn to face him.
“I love you.” He says genuinely with a wistful expression on his face. You reach your hand out to stroke his cheek with a warm smile on your face.
“I know.” You say as your eyelids become heavy. You snuggle into him, wrapping your arms around him and preparing for the best nap of your life. “I love you too.”
457 notes
·
View notes
Text
Pathfinder's Quest — Bangalore/Wraith, Voidstrike Shipping Speculation? (7/7)
I'm going to talk about my thoughts on the Apex Legends lore book in a series of smaller posts. I have a LOT of fractured thoughts on this book and it would be unnecessarily long if I were to list them out in the same post. If you want to skip to some other post because the content in this one doesn't sound interesting, please do so! I will be numbering the posts and tagging them with "nix talks apex book lore" if you'd like to follow these specific posts and "apex book spoilers" if you'd like to avoid them.
This special post will strictly be about Voidstrike speculation. Keep in mind that this is speculation with a theory based on available lore. You don't have to take this seriously, but if you ship Voidstrike in any capacity, you might want to read this. Caution that this post will be very long and will contain quite a few images from the book as well as Broken Ghost and other supporting material. Let's go!
Book Content + Supporting Material
All right. I've been waiting an entire month to write up this post. You all know by now that Voidstrike is my OTP for Apex Legends. The unfortunate problem with this ship, like some other ships in Apex, is that they have the bare minimum of interaction with each other. Even in this book that proves to be true, except for one interesting little exchange through Pathfinder...
Do you see this comment? I asked Tom Casiello, Senior Writer of Apex Legends and Target of Internet Scorn (just poking fun at his twitter bio here), about it on Twitter and this is what he said:
Yes, that's right, y'all. These two have beef. I can imagine Wraith is little pissed about the whole "headcase" thing from Season 5's Broken Ghost quest:
I mean, can you blame Wraith? Anita’s kind of an asshole in canon, if we’re being honest, so Wraith wanting to get back at her in some way makes sense. She went the fuck off on Mirage when he made a similar comment about her in the Season 6 comic posted on Twitter. What's even weirder is Anita's response when Pathfinder tells her what Wraith said:
Now. I know what you’re thinking. “Nix, it’s not that deep, Anita’s just being a sarcastic dick.” And you would likely be correct, and I would not disagree with you. On the next page, however, this exchange happens:
First of all, why would Anita ask "why would Wraith tell me anything?" Has she tried talking to Wraith before and Wraith may have been closed off and/or hesitant? Or maybe she doesn't fully trust Anita because Anita has such strong feelings about the IMC? Is she... hurt by Wraith not telling her things? Did Wraith try to open up once before, get shot down by Anita's reaction to the IMC, and Anita's been a little salty about it since, henceforth, the shitty "headcase" comment? Maybe Wraith is being a little shit and getting back at her in a weird way. This comment initially sounded vaguely flirty but what do I know except the writers haven't been known to just write things for literally no reason...
Lots to think about here, but I'm hoping we'll get a follow-up to this in-game at some point.
And second of all, why would Pathfinder ask if they're best friends? I know he has an interesting view of who he considers friends...generally people who have talked to him for more than a minute:
But a “best friend”? What would give him that assumption about these two? Is it because they have some things in common? Or has he seen them interacting more than we (the players and lorehounds) know of? Is it because of their one exchange in Broken Ghost? I don’t think so at all. Granted, right on the next page Anita calls Wraith a lab rat (pretty shitty!), but as we learn later on, she is really sensitive and defensive about people who speak badly about the IMC (more on this in my post about Bangalore). I'm thinking Path mentioning Wraith being IMC pissed her off because Wraith, overall, blames them for what happened to her.
In any case, it's an interesting question to ask, and I do have to wonder if Wraith and Anita have been seen talking to one another for more than a minute lol. But Anita's answer is intriguing. She doesn't flat out say no. We know Anita to be very direct—sarcastic, sure—but generally you'd expect a straight fucking answer from her. Here, she doesn't even give one. She beats around the bush for an answer. What I think is happening here is about the same as her talking about Octane and Mirage. Remember that loading screen from Season 3? No? Well, let me refresh your memory...
Send in the Clowns (Season 3 Loading Screen)
Numbnuts! That’s what Mama used to call guys like that. You know the type. Big jokes, big trucks, big wallets...they need all that big to cover up what’s small. I got four brothers. Real gentlemen, raised with respect. They don’t have to woo-hoo their way through a battlefield like it’s a joke and they’re the punchline. Sorry, Laughtrack. The only punchline is you’re going home in a box.
Maybe Silva isn’t so bad. He’d take a bullet for anyone… mostly ‘cause he’s already fifty paces ahead, charging in with no game plan and even less strategy. Witt’s had my back more than once. And whatever, he’s gotten a chuckle out of me. Occasionally. Maybe they’re good. For morale, I mean. I mean… I just need them to stay out of my way.
She's just... like that. Anita is the type of person who won't openly admit that she actually likes or respects anyone. She's guarded, and she's probably been this way since her brother Jackson died. And that's where Loba comes in.
See, I think Loba has been making Anita rethink some things about opening up. Anita initially pegged Loba wrong, and in her chapter, Pathfinder basically figures out that she initially hated Loba because Loba reminds her of her older brother's shitty girlfriend:
I think Loba's purpose in her and Anita's budding friendship is to eventually lead Anita to opening up to others, especially Wraith, since Path mentioned they have a lot in common, which is something I've been saying for fucking months. Now, Wraith and Anita haven't really had any interaction that we know of outside of Broken Ghost and the book, but there have been some....very minor hints/foreshadowing. I'm going to preface this by saying you may think I'm being a little...out there with these points, but trust me, we'll touch on why these matter later. For now:
Back in Season 1, both Bangalore and Wraith were the first two Legends to get Legendary skins in the Legendary Hunt themed event. First occurence is an incident.
In the Season 3 opening trailer, Caustic throws a gas canister inside a room and you can vaguely see Bangalore and Wraith in the room on the same team:
In the Legend select screen, these two were right next to each other up until they were separated in Season 6. They were together. Five. Straight. Seasons. Was there another, more subtle reason they were separated? Common sense would say no, it's because we're getting more Legends and the UI needs to change to accommodate. Shipping and speculation sense would say maybe it's metaphorical and foreshadowing a story element. Maybe something happened between them that we aren't aware of yet and they've separated.
At the end of Season 6 for the Fight or Fright Halloween event, we got a bundle of skins called the Wicked Wraith bundle. Guess who's in it? Bangalore and Wraith plus some gun skins. But only these two Legends.. Hm.. Two's a coincidence.
In Season 7, we got the Black Friday event where we got both Airship Assassin and Outland Warrior back in the shop, two beloved Wraith and Bangalore skins respectively. Three's a pattern, and with this lovely banner:
In Season 8, for the Two-Year Anniversary Event, both Bangalore and Wraith received stat trackers of their concept art... We typically only get two Legends' trackers per each event with a prize track, and we got these two for this event? I predicted back in October 2020 that they would get stat trackers in the same event, but I didn't expect this event out of everything.
If one's an incident, two's a coincidence, and three's a pattern, then what's four very similar occurrences?
If you've read up to this point, you're either deprived for Voidstrike content like I am, or wondering just how much further I'm willing to dig for hints to support this ship. Trust me, I have a little more.
I am predicting that Anita and Wraith will start having some interaction starting Season 9 or 10. Why? Well, back at the start of Season 7, there was a Reddit AMA with the senior team members of Respawn. It was mostly to address the battlepass issue, but Manny Hagopian, the Lead Writer for Apex Legends, was also there answering questions, so I took a shot and asked him one:
You can totally chalk this up to typical “I can’t say anything right now” PR talk, sure, but I think he's hinting that this was in the plans. Tom has also said something:
Now, granted, this is Tom and mostly everyone takes whatever he says with a grain of salt, myself included, but it's worth keeping an eye on since what Manny says kind of lines up. We were supposed to get a follow-up to Broken Ghost, but that story, whatever it was, ended up being... let's say, "altered"? Tom has a thread on what actually happened on Twitter (that I did link here, but removed for fear of this post not appearing in the tags), but the follow-up was essentially "axed" and bits and pieces of it had to be kicked down the road in various different formats in the lore. What does this have to do with Season 9 and my theory?
Well, there's supposed to be some crazy stuff happening in Season 9 and I think we're going to start to see some elements pop up from what was supposed to happen in Broken Ghost. Why? Well another thing Tom said from that same Twitter thread:
I think whatever Tom was working on was related to IMC, Bangalore, and Wraith. And the reason I believe this is because of a now-deleted video from Chris Edgerly’s twitch stream from back around May 27th, 2020 or so where Tom was a guest. I unfortunately didn’t think to archive the page or video so I don’t have it, but I can say with confidence that I asked a question about Anita and Wraith having some future interaction about the IMC stuff, and the answer he gave was...suspiciously vague. He said something along the lines of:
"I just started writing something dealing with that and you should get to see it before the end of the year [2020]. And that’s all I’ll say on that :]"
I know that’s...well it doesn't say MUCH, but it is making me think that it's the same content he may have been working on. I have a feeling it may be in comic form, but who knows how the format may change. Season 9 is supposed to be fairly game-changing for Apex overall, according to the devs.
The last bit I wanted to mention was character development. I said earlier how I think Loba is helping Anita open up a bit more overall, and eventually that will turn towards others as well as Wraith. Anita, compared to other Legends, has seen character development through voice lines. And Wraith is kind of doing the same. Like sure Loba talks to Anita, but she hasn't really...progressed as a character much. She's remained fairly flat so far. We're actively seeing Anita's walls break down as she becomes more vulnerable as a person. And no one else is really doing this much except for, arguably, Wraith.
Wraith has had some very introspective voice lines to herself while on Olympus, basically wondering if the Rift explosion was a result of her experiments, wondering what type of person she was to have partnered with Singh. Wattson even mentions she looks more lost than usual, and Wraith responds that she needs to handle this on her own for now. We know from the end of Season 6's comics that she's learned she was apparently a shitty person in her past life with anger issues and a severe lack of empathy. She wonders about this and is actively working towards... not being like that lol. She's also fairly sarcastic as we've seen with her voice lines with Rampart, but she's developing as a character, albeit slowly and more subtly than Anita.
So now that that's all out of the way. Where do we go from here? Well, this brings me to a theory I've manifested due to the points in the post so far.
The Theory
What if Anita and Wraith were on pretty okay terms with each other previously and we just haven't heard about it yet? What if they’ve known each other for a while?
Anita has been in the Outlands with a small group of IMC soldiers, her brother Jackson and General Lewis included, for about 18 years. She's been in the Apex Games for about 3 years and the Hestia incident happened about 3 years ago:
That lines up. Since the start of the Apex Legends lore takes place in 2733 (as of Season 8 we are now in the year 2734 in lore), that would mean she had to have joined around 2730. What about Wraith?
Well... I think Anita and Wraith joined the Apex Games around the same time. In the book Wraith mentions that she took a few years to hone her skills before she ended up in a qualifying match:
She arrived at our Kings Canyon in 2727. If she took a few years, she had to have joined around 2730-2731. What if they met and actually were amicable? Closed-off on both ends, but mutually respectful towards each other as coworkers? And maybe this is what causes Pathfinder to assume they're "best friends" in the book.
...That is until the Repulsor incident happened and the IMC labs under Kings Canyon were eventually unearthed. Wraith learned her real name and what the IMC (ARES more specifically) did to her and so did the rest of the Legends she was somewhat close to—Mirage, Pathfinder, and...Anita.
What if Anita took the IMC disrespect personally, thought Wraith was placing blame on the IMC instead of taking responsibility for her own actions like Anita mentions in the book, and Anita blew up about it? Wraith would probably feel extremely hurt by this and withdraw from opening up even more. At this point, Anita would hold a bit of a grudge about the IMC bad-mouthing.
They continue to work as coworkers and on a team when necessary, but the mutual respect has been...lost. Wraith finds friendship elsewhere in Wattson. Fast forward to the events of Broken Ghost. Anita is stressed, annoyed, dealing with too much shit at leading the operation, and hurls an insult at Wraith, the infamous "headcase" comment. It's extremely shitty and uncalled for and while Wraith doesn't explode at her in the moment because of dire circumstances, she absolutely doesn't forget it. It hurts her deeply.
What if after the events of Broken Ghost, their connection is severed. There's some bad blood between them. Wraith's friendship grows with Wattson while Anita's friendship grows with Loba. That separation in the Legend Select screen starting from Season 6 onwards seems a lot more metaphorical...
So fast forward once again to Wraith's comment directed at Anita in the book. It was an opening Pathfinder inadvertently provided and it was an opportunity to take a jab at Anita. But instead of being overtly shitty, she makes a relatively teasing comment. Maybe an olive branch to squash what they have and move on? Anita's response is to thank Wraith when she sees her again. Sarcasm? Maybe. But what if she's being genuine? What if the comment was a joke reflective of the type of humor they shared when they were on better terms with each other?
Anita has been opening up more to Loba, and though shes's still sensitive about the IMC, what if she's more willing to...apologize for the initial shitty comment?
The Theory Continued
Anita has recently, in canon, mentioned Jackson to Loba. Jackson is a VERY sensitive topic for her, and so far, the only two people we know of who have heard her discuss Jackson are Loba and Pathfinder. An interesting thing about Jackson that can be tied back to Wraith is this:
Anita clearly does not accept the ARES Division as part of the IMC, but more than that...Jackson found out the ugly truth about the IMC overall and believed it. Wraith was part of ARES Division and it's why Anita doesn't consider her IMC. Here's where the connection can work:
Continuing the same theory, what if Wraith reminds Anita of Jackson in the worst way possible because of what he told her about the IMC and ARES? Wraith revealing her name and what happened to her conjured up old, painful memories and caused Anita to lash out and close herself off again. Now that Loba is bringing out discussions of Jackson in canon, what if this leads to Anita and Wraith coming back together and rekindling their friendship? There's a lovely quote from Jackson's letter in the book that I feel could foreshadow that happening, too:
"...But in all seriousness, I'm so proud of you. And always remember, what's broken can be fixed. What's shredded can be mended. And what's torn apart can always be put back together again. Love always, Jackson." (82)
What if eventually—slowly, but surely—rekindling this lost friendship leads to Anita opening up to Wraith again? What if it leads to Anita being open and vulnerable enough to learn more about the IMC and ARES Division with/through Wraith via the labs under Kings Canyon? That place is a goldmine of classified information and she very well can see and hear firsthand all the terrible shit they've done. It would be extremely hard to do this, of course. And that's where Manny's comment from the Reddit AMA comes into effect: "...There's much more for both characters to learn and when they do, it's very possible to experience a moment between them, but patience is important."
This is, of course, all just a theory based on what we know about the lore. Is it ridiculous? Possibly! But I also don't think it's entirely farfetched either.
In Conclusion...
I imagine once we get to Season 9—potentially 10 at the latest for quarantine padding and last-minute changes—maybe we'll start seeing them begin to acknowledge each other in some way, and I'm thinking mostly negatively at first. And I don't think it'll be a lot either. Maybe a snarky location voice line or two. Maybe a little mention in a comic or Twitter lore bit. But only a little.
I definitely do think we can expect to see them getting to the point of interacting in the future, but it'll be a slow ride and slow burn. And hey even if we don't... I'll have this post to keep me warm for the rest of my days playing Apex.
Anyway, that's all I have for you! Thanks for reading if you made it this far, I do appreciate it. I love this pairing a lot, and this was really fun to write! Remember, it's just speculation based on....stuff, haha. You don't have to take it or like it at all, but what else am I to do when I'm starved for interaction of my ship? :]
43 notes
·
View notes
Note
3, 4, and 7 for the fics are really intriguing me!
3. The Kids Are Alright (Are We?)
so this is a product of a lot of talks with @natearchie about nate/dan/blair and how we love Dan having kids (specifically Milo but this is an au so). Basically Dan/Blair were dating in high school, Blair got pregnant, and was then separated forcibly.. in the meantime Dan ended up marrying Nate over the years and adopting a girl... and then both kids then meeting up in the same elementary school
.... and now i'm trying to write chapter three and i'm struggling
4. Shut Up and Kiss
this is a Shadowhunters highschool/human!au focusing on Jimon. I'm literally so close to having finished this, as @takaraphoenix likes to remind me lmfao, but the problem is I had originally written this with another huge sh ship that the fandom very much ruined for me and so I'm struggling trying not to re-write the entire thing and that struggle is making it hard to just write the last few chapters lol
7. Grishaverse College AU
this is basically a "the crows are in a frat house and the og crowd is in a competing one" where they are all human (yeah i realize i have a trope) and it's great and fun and for this one I'll give a snippet lol:
Muscles sore from the long gymnastics practice after her Intro to Criminal Law class, Inej is ready for home and even more, her bathtub. Laughter belonging to Nina and Jesper greets her the second she opens the door, and she searches for the source after dropping her gym bag by the doorstep. Chaos isn’t abnormal to her any longer, but as she enters the kitchen she's actually surprised to see Kaz in the middle of it.
Nina is barely holding on to the corner of one of the kitchen counters with how heavy she’s laughing. Jesper, Wylan, and Kaz sit at the large circular table, providing quite the scene. Wylan is handing Kaz water bottles that Kaz is chugging amidst a demonic glare he points at Nina, and Jesper is lazily sitting back amongst them with a grin that’s interrupted by chuckles.
“What is going on?” she asks, and while Wylan jumps at her voice, the rest of the gang is barely distracted by her entrance. It’s almost insulting, at least until Wylan answers.
“Kaz was pissed about the hair incident and decided to eat Nina’s brownies out of spite, not realizing that they were weed brownies.”
Nina is still half-way wheezing, although she moved from the counter to give Inej a hug. Jesper is failing at hiding a smirk as he taunts Kaz. “Water isn’t going to prevent the high, you know that?”
“I’m going to murder this entire household. Inej go spend the night with Zoya.” Kaz spat in response, his glare flickering from Jesper to Nina again.
“No, I think I’ll stay here,” Inej replied, finding a smirk falling onto her lips despite herself. “It’s time your spite got the best of you.”
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
Rights in the UK
I don’t really know what I’m about to write as I start this, but I’ve been feeling some feelings lately about the social and political climate surrounding trans people.
I’m grateful to be in the UK, which relatively speaking is a fairly progressive and safe country for trans people compared to many others.
But I am still scared.
I’m not scared that I will be individually targeted and assaulted in the street. Although the 2,500 hate crimes against transgender people last year alone (a 210% increase since 2015/16) suggests that maybe my lack of concern is the privileged complacency of not being visibly trans, especially when we see that 81% of LGBT people don’t even report the hate crimes against them. That complacency lives on a tightrope however; I am one incident away, one incident of my trans status falling into the wrong hands, from realising that I am not immune to the abuse that I see my local trans sisters face on a daily basis.
And how confident would I be that any hate crime I were to experience would be dealt with appropriate and effectively? Well given that Scottish minister Humza Yousaf very almost pushed through amendments to Scotland’s Hate Crime & Public Order Bill that would directly exclude transgender people I may, perhaps naively, expect the police and courts to provide protection and justice for me now, but I am constantly reminded of just how fragile my protections are and how they can be snatched away at any given moment, and with public support.
What really scares me is the disregard for our rights and the increasing amounts of ‘anti trans’ pressure groups in the UK who are continuing to gain support and traction, including many that are LGBT based wishing to exclude us from their community entirely.
1. Gender Recognition Act
The Gender Recognition Act is one example I will address. This act is the means that trans people in the UK use to legally change their gender and acquire an updated birth certificate. This is a sixteen year old, heavily bureaucratic, expensive and lengthy process. It requires a payment of £140 and the following, many of which are also not free to obtain:
a) The requirement for the trans person to provide two medical reports, one evidencing a diagnosis of gender dysphoria and the other outlining details of any treatment received;
b) The requirement for the trans person to provide a range of documentation that proves they have lived in their acquired gender for at least two years;
c) The requirement for the trans person to submit a statutory declaration of their intention to live in their acquired gender until death;
d) The requirement for married applicants to obtain the consent of their spouse or end their marriage;
e) The cost to the trans person of using the GRA process
It’s the very reason that over a decade later, I still have not obtained my gender recognition certificate. And given that an average of 300 GRC applications are processed each year compared to the estimated 200,000 to 500,000 trans people in the UK, I suspect I’m not the only one.
So anyway, in 2018 there was a consultation about the Gender Recognition Act with over 100,000 respondents and promises to reform this act. The response was hugely positive with the vast majority supporting the reform. It highlighted all the issues with the process that is preventing trans people gaining legal recognition. We were all hopeful, and many of us who had been awaiting this moment to gain our own GRCs sat in wait. Unfortunately, two years later, the government announced that they had decided to scrap plans to reform the GRA altogether stating that this was not the priority for trans people. The consultation was also considered to be biased due to too many positive responses; despite only ~20% of respondents being trans themselves and ~20% being from all called upon by anti-trans groups such as Fair Play for Women.
2. The Keira Bell case
I don’t wish to get into the finer details of the case itself or my opinions on the matters involved, but to give a brief overview, a woman who transitioned and received puberty blockers at age 16, testosterone at age 17 and a double mastectomy at age 20. She later detransitioned and went on to sue the NHS (National Health Service) claiming that she was not challenged enough and that under 18s cannot consent to treatment such as puberty blockers with the aim to prevent the prescription of puberty blockers for all trans youth.
Long story short, she was successful and the Tavistock clinic, ie the only gender identity clinic in the UK that treats trans people under the age of 18, is no longer able to prescribe puberty blockers to anyone under the age of 16, with those between 16-18 having to seek approval via court first.
If we take a look at who was involved in this court case we see Keira Bell herself and her mother as the claimants and the Tavistock clinic as the defendant. For the interested parties who had direct input into this case we had “Mrs A” - the mother of a 15yr old autistic child displaying gender dysphoria who is firmly against her child being able to access a gender clinic (interestingly, any of her input was regarded as purely hypothetical since her child had never attended, nor would ever attend a gender identity clinic), we also had Transgender Trend - an anti-trans pressure group and finally, we have the University College of London who are not gender specialists. Meanwhile, groups such as Mermaids who are a well-known charity aimed at supporting trans children and Stonewall who are campaigners for LGBT rights in the UK both applied and were both denied access to this case. The judge of course did also not have any authority on the subject.
My issue here is yet again, how fragile my rights and protections feel and my ever waning confidence that government or legal processes are in any way fair and balanced. This was not a fair trial; there was no balance in stances, other than the defendant there were no gender specialists or even anyone heavily involved in the lives and care of trans people. The majority of interested parties were there with a firm agenda, and those that countered their beliefs were not allowed through the doors.
Puberty blockers are not an issue that affect me directly, but if a biased court taking the likes of “Mrs A” and her ‘theoretical’ input over reputable charities with a wealth of knowledge, experience and expertise can be created to make such rulings and remove healthcare from an entire demographic of people then what is stopping that happening to my healthcare? Nothing, that’s what.
3. The census
Our census takes place every ten years and has always allowed transgender individuals to choose the sex that aligns with their passport. For me personally, selecting male feels like a far more accurate representation of my place in society, my legal status and my physicality along with the fact that I have been listed as male in previous census forms.
This year however, a second question was added. This questions asks “do you identify with your sex assigned at birth” with the options being yes or no and a box to enter further information when selecting no. The official guidance on the first question remained the same, stating that it was appropriate to select the sex that aligned with passports or legal documents. The first question allows data to be gathered on men and women, the second question allows data to be gathered specifically on the number of transgender individuals and other identities such as non binary - the two questions are entirely independent of each other and will generate separate sets of data.
But today, it came to light that anti-transgender pressure group, Fair Play for Women crowdfunded £100,000 to challenge this and bring it to court. This was successful and the official guidance has now changed to exclude all legal documents except a gender recognition certificate - which as previously mentioned, only a small percentage of trans people actually have due to the long, expensive and bureaucratic process involved in obtaining one.
Personally, I don’t really mind if I have to tick female to a question that asks my sex at birth. The question doesn’t explicitly ask for sex at birth however and is more aimed at showing the demographics of the UK for which female is absolutely not accurate for me. What bothers me is that a group have raised £100,000 from the public to ensure that we can’t select an accurate representation of who we are and our place in society and that it was approved.
4. The toilet provision
This has flown under the radar due to Covid-19 but the government recently held a consultation around public toilets. It seems fairly innocent at first glance. Except again, we’re seeing these anti-trans pressure groups calling for action amongst their followers, some with the call to ‘protect single sex spaces’. Could this be the beginnings of American-style bathroom bills in the UK?
---
So yes, I am scared. I’m scared by the fragility of my rights and freedoms; how easy they are to peel away bit by bit and how it passes by with little notice nor care, or in some cases with public support and even funding. I’m scared of the people who are given the power to make decisions about our rights based on no prior knowledge of experience of trans issues. I’m scared that we will be alienated and excluded from our LGBT spaces and supports. Will I be looking back in ten years, eternally grateful that I was able to transition when I did? Grateful for the gender clinics of today with their six year waiting lists? Will I live in a time where I must disclose my trans status on every document, at every job? Will I live in a time where I must provide my sex in order to use the gym? Will there be a time that I am not able to legally change my gender? I’m scared by the hostility of society, at times their vehement opposition to us existing amongst them, their disregard for the importance of our healthcare and all too often the anger that our ‘cosmetic’ surgeries are covered at all.
In a time that my life and rights feel like a debate, unimportant and constantly at the mercy of others, in a time that members of the public will raise huge amounts of money just to stop people like you ticking a box on a form, you’re damn right I’m scared for the future.
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
Realm of the Quarantine Reread End-of-Book Questionnaire: Royal Assassin
Any differences between your first/previous reading experience and this one?
Not as stark a difference as with Assassin’s Apprentice, but definitely still there. Apart from all the obvious stuff, like feeling much more attached to the characters already and picking up more details, I think the biggest change was a complete lack of patience for the teen romance drama lol. There was a decent period where I was feeling quite frustrated with it. Not that I loved it the first time round, but back then I had a very different view of how it fit into the story. I saw it as teaching Fitz a depressing lesson of what it really means to be a royal bastard and a king’s man. Fitz’s literal need (for all he knows he would have been killed if not for his deal with Shrewd) and sense of duty to put his loyalty to his king and country first creates a relationship that is toxic, turbulent and built on lies. And teenage horniness masquerading as love. I saw all that the first time and thought it was just something he had to go through. Now I know it’s something he never really goes through but rather grips onto, romanticises and ultimately goes back to. I know the point of that is meant to be that he finally gets to have something for himself, but why it had to be Molly specifically??? I have very few qualms with Robin’s writing choices overall, but why she chose to write their relationship this way if they really are meant to be is beyond me, especially when so many of her other romances are written so well - it feels like it can’t possibly be unintentional. For most of this book they’re either fighting or fucking and honey! That ain’t love! Hell, Fitz all but sees her as just another demand on his time as the book goes on. But he can’t let her go because she’s the one thing he can point to that makes him feel normal. Not happy, not cherished, not safe. Normal. She’s simply a refuge from his real life. He literally says to Chade “I need her.” I find that so telling, man. It’s not really about her, which is a shame because Molly is great. They’re just really not good for each other.
So yeah. It’s just kind of trying to read all the Fitz/Molly stuff when you know and don’t like what it ultimately culminates in. At the same time… Bee… So I will always be conflicted lol. I just can’t separate the events of Royal Assassin from the furious disappointment I felt when I finished Fool’s Fate. Perhaps I’ll have a new Fool’s Fate experience this time that will make the next re-read a bit easier in regards to Fitz and Molly? But I won’t bet on it lol.
Anyway. It’s not as if I haven’t already said just about everything there possibly is to say about Fitz and Molly yet I also feel like I could go on about it forever. Luckily this is kind of as bad as it gets in terms of how much “screen time” they actually get (apart from Fool’s Assassin maybe? But they don’t bother me too much in that) so yay! I made it! And hopefully it’ll be a good few books before y’all have to endure my ranting about it again :)) Also hopefully this doesn’t give the impression that this read was more bad than good? It was mostly just a particular angsty chunk before they properly get together that was a bit of a slog to get through, but overall I really loved reading this book again and got a lot out of it.
Something you can’t believe you forgot
That Molly punches Fitz in the face hard enough that he bleeds and that Fitz fully intended to punch the Fool for asking if Molly was preggo before seeing he had already been beaten. I pretend I do not see it.
Favourite character introduction moments/scenes
Omfg I was just about to say “huh we didn’t really get any major character intros in this book” bitch Nighteyes???? But in my defence I just. Cannot process the fact that Nighteyes is only really in 3 of 16 books he just feels omnipresent to me BUT his introduction is most definitely iconique and god I love him and he made me cry eight thousand times!
Favourite character arcs
Speaking of Nighteyes: what a glow up. He goes from angry, scared, untrusting little bb to……. Nighteyes. Like. How does one even describe the kind of person Nighteyes becomes. He’s just Nighteyes and I love him with all my fuckin heart!! He is Fitz’s constant… He is wise… He is silly… a comedic genius…… a big, open, unconditional heart. Incomparable. I can’t believe I’ve seen ppl saying they dislike/d Nighteyes……. Honey…… it’s called taste xx
Favourite quote/s
Again no tabs so it’s a bit harder to keep track but there were a few that stuck out enough to copy down. There are a lot of iconic quotes in this book that get shared a lot so I only bothered with ones I didn’t remember.
- “I wince to think of the price willingly paid for loving me.”
- “My soft, clean bed beckoned, like a soft, clean tomorrow.” (mood)
- “I looked and saw they were both made of hungers, like containers made of emptiness.”
Favourite relationships
Kettricken/Verity obviously. I was shocked by how little time they actually have together being in love before Verity leaves??? Because all I remembered was how strong their love is. But the whole journey towards that love is what makes it stand out as an actual compelling story in its own right. This is definitely one of Robin’s greatest skills as a writer; giving the minor characters depth by giving them their own relationships that grow and change and have a life of their own outside of Fitz. It makes the world feel so much more alive.
Also Burrich/Fitz in this book continues to be bittersweet, but with a lot more sweet in there than usual! They fully start out this book as a team. Burrich calling Fitz “FitzChivalry” makes me fuckin emo and idk why even. Burrich does seem to start seeing Fitz a lot more as his own person in this book which changes their dynamic in some rly nice ways. The fact that towards the end of the book Burrich even uses the wit to help Fitz is enough to make me cry tbh - and writing this has made me realise that I’m officially past any uncomplicated good times between Burrich and Fitz y’all mind if I fuckin die real quick!!
Fitz/Verity is soy pure and beautiful. Fitz and the Fool is always, always compelling and complex and tender and perfectly mysterious. But overall you’d have to say Fitz/Nighteyes, hey? They are literally meant to be, in a way so straightforward and undeniable and beautifully simple that I never really know what to say about it. Little brother!!! :’) They literally make me cry all the frickin time lol rip!
Favourite setting
There aren’t that many to choose from in this book! Ima go with the skill river bc hey, Robin’s magic systems are so unique and beautiful and the fact that the skill is written as a kind of a place is really frickin cool and deserves a shoutout.
Favourite chapter
The final chapter (not the epilogue) ummm broke my heart but it is written so beautifully, oh my god, it’s like an out of body experience. I feel like this is kind of when RotE becomes RotE - the first time it really goes to that place that is so fitting yet so unexpected, so beautiful, so tragic, so awful, so visceral. Making use of the genre to really test the limits of humanity; to see how far you can bend a person without breaking them and then refusing to turn away from the consequences. Idk man!! I don’t know how to describe it without sounding like a pretentious dick but it really is that intense and strange and overwhelming for me. There is something in that moment, when Burrich pulls Fitz’s body out of the earth and Fitz/Nighteyes is recoiling from it and deeply terrified… Something about the enormity of the existential questions raised converging with the pinpoint specificity of it all being wrapped up in the story of a character that feels so real and who you care about so deeply… It’s almost written like a horror scene, but that’s not quite the feeling. It’s just the RotE feeling; there are multiple throughout all five series, and it’s what makes these books unlike any other.
Most loved character
Fitz, Nighteyes, the Fool all had my entire heart this book. The Fool is just so sad and pathetic and literally must be protected!! I think I’m kind of obsessed with Burrich? Also I think I almost forgot how much I love Kettricken? She’s a complete badass of course but she’s also got the biggest goddamn heart like…. Who said she was allowed to be such a beautiful person???
But god, everyone. I love them all.
Most hated character
What can I say? Regal is disgostang. Wall Ass a close second.
Raise your hand if you’ve been personally victimised by Robin Hobb (most heartbreaking and/or visceral moments)
Shall I list just a few? :)
- Burrich screaming at Fitz through the bars of his jail cell, horrible things you can’t help but feel are at least a little bit true
- Burrich sobbing over Fitz’s dead body repeating, “You aren’t dead, you aren’t dead.”
- Fitz going to Nighteyes before everything went down on the night of the coronation and just fuckin hugging him really tight
- Fitz trying desperately to leave his broken vessel behind but not quite being able to disown his body
- The Fool being beaten
- The Fool being beaten again
- The Fool sprawled and weeping across Shrewd’s dead body
- The Fool really believing for a moment that Fitz had betrayed him and killed Shrewd
- Fitz tending the Fool’s wounds………. bitch….
- Chade giving Fitz a chance to escape with them and Fitz going to kill Serene and Justin instead
- Idk why this is even that sad but Nighteyes saying the only person he loves is Fitz!
- The entire incident with the forged ones literally tearing apart a three year old girl, which I had completely blocked out until now :)
- The fact that Fitz continues to be reminded and traumatised by this incident for the remainder of the book beCAUSE HE IS A GOOD BOY. A VERY GOOD BOY WITH A VERY GOOD HEART.
- Fitz repelling at Nighteyes to try and force their bond broken
- LITTLE BROTHER
- WOLVES HAVE NO KINGS
- High off his face Fitz calling Patience “mother” no shut the fuck up!!!!
Details, observations, spoilery notes made with the benefit of the full picture
- I’ve been trying for ages to decipher when the Fool started falling for Fitz, and I think I’m officially putting my money on their last interaction in AA. “I wish I had a place that was as much me as that place is you.” I mean. If someone said that to me… I’m not a slut but who knows, ya know? (I know this is more a note for the last book but I thought of it while reading this book. So shh.)
- It’s so clear to see this time how much Fitz’s sense of self and politics are affected by his time in the Mountains. He obviously feels much more inclined to their way of thinking about royalty and sacrifice and equality and returns to Buckkeep with a self-respect he’s never really had before. Weird how being among people who don’t just think of you as The Bastard will do that.
- It’s no wonder Fitz becomes so fixated on Molly; he literally has almost nothing else to occupy him and no companionship when she suddenly shows up
- It’s gross that he spies on her, obviously, but you can’t not take into account the fact that Chade has been teaching him since he was ten that this is justifiable behaviour; a reasonable way to gather information and get what you want. Fitz’s lack of social awareness goes further than him just being a little awkward; he has literally been trained to believe the only thing wrong with stalking would be getting caught.
- I’ve seen a few people talk about the fact that Regal isn’t appropriately punished as if it’s bad writing and like, while it is frustrating, it is supposed to be frustrating - it is not a plot hole. It made sense to me the first time I read it and it was even more obvious this time; Regal has the loyalty of the inland duchies. If he were to be publicly punished those dukes would rally behind him and raise hell, and Regal would no longer need to play the part of the dutiful prince. Even if Regal died a “natural” death - something I can’t see Shrewd or Verity orchestrating anyway - the inland dukes would feel that they no longer have a Farseer on their side and may, again, raise hell. It’s a delicate balance that would be outrageously difficult not to topple if you removed Regal from the equation. There is a lot more to it than I’ll bother writing here but yeah. I don’t really know how people can read this book and think that Regal retaining his life and position is some sort of lazy plot contrivance. It was all set up in the first book dude.
- Fitz and Nighteyes meeting in this book is the perfect metaphor for our need for connection versus the fear of inevitable loss. Fitz’s experience tells him that entering into a bond with an animal can only end in pain, yet he can’t resist it. In real life this is especially true with humans and our animal companions, since they almost always have a shorter lifespan than us; signing up to love them is signing up to lose them. But the same is also true of our relationships with other humans. And like Fitz, we have all had our fair share of loss and pain. We all have our reasons to be afraid of the connection we naturally crave. Sometimes we give in to the fear to the point of holding ourselves back from it entirely. That’s where Fitz is at when he meets Nighteyes. But what’s so beautiful about their arc as a metaphor is that it suggests that these connections, if we submit to them, are what keep our vital spark alive. Even when Nighteyes dies later in the series, the sentiment always remains, essentially, “It’s better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all.” Ya boi is projecting bc it’s hard to be vulnerable and make friends as an adult, but I think the observation stands. Love and connection and vulnerability are key threads that run throughout all of Fitz’s story, but in this book it is best represented through him and Nighteyes.
- “I hoped I would not become too adept at lying to myself.” Honey, you got a big storm comin.
- Very inch resting (gay) that Fitz finds it hard to meet the Fool’s eyes. I know almost everyone does bc his eyes are weird, but I reserve the right to reach and I will absolutely NOT be accepting criticism.
- I find it interesting that Fitz says Kettricken’s wit is not strong just because she doesn’t use it exactly the way he does
- I know it’s not meant to be funny but……. The way Fitz described losing his virginity had me literally laughing out loud
- Fitz was really like “okay i better go break my bond with Nighteyes” just cos he and Molly fucked. Teenagers don’t deserve rights.
- You know what? I really, really appreciate how fucking weird these books are lol. What other author would use their magic system to have their characters accidentally intruding on each other’s awkward sex stuff? Okay, maybe a few, but they would do it to be like, edgy and sexy. Robin Hobb just does it to make you cringe so hard you lose several years off of your life.
- But seriously, even apart from the cringe stuff, these books get so strange and out there and like! That’s what magic is for!
- Bruh. When Fitz is like “omg poor Verity…. He’ll never have what i have with Molly” I don’t think I’ve ever heard someone encapsulate the self-important delusion of teen romance so perfectly lol. Wow.
- Okay some Fitz/Fool stuff that made me lose my tiny mind. Sorry.
- Fitz literally said about the Fool “he burned too brightly” I WILL DIE.
- Fitz is always like, irritated by the Fool… yet positively delighted by his presence at the same time…… okay bitch
- Inch resting how Fitz has always been uncomfortable with the Fool getting serious. I don’t quite know how to put my thoughts on this into words so like. I’ll just put it there. Make of it what you will.
- “Sit on my clothes chest and take your shirt off…” i stopped fucking breathing noah fence
- “I ran my fingers lightly down the line of his jaw, and around his eye socket. At least no bone seemed damaged. ‘Who did this to you?’ I asked him.” my GOD this is literally textbook gay/romance. It hurts me. It physically hurts me.
- Straight from my notes: “I can’t even focus on reading this bc it’s the first time they are tending each other’s wounds and I am a homosexual!” and “the gays are quaking!! (it’s me I’m the gays)
- Okay wow! I think that’s it! Hello if you made it this far! Hope this was remotely coherent and I’m always keen to hear your thoughts on my thoughts :)
Anyone doing a reread feel free to fill this out! You don’t have to use the tag :)
#rote#realm of the elderlings#royal assassin#royal assassin spoilers#fitzchivalry farseer#realm of the quarantine
37 notes
·
View notes
Text
A Misunderstanding: Lee Minho Soulmate Au Pt.3
Hey guys, I know it’s been a while since I posted for this series and I would like to apologize for that. In the past couple of years, I have had things happening in my life for the good and the worse which has affected my overall health. Because of that, I was never in the right headspace to continue this series. But every now and then, I’ll get notification that people have read my series which makes me happy. Now, that everything is okay with me, I have decided to continue writing and finishing up this series. There will be another part to this with an epilogue in the end so do look out for that! But for now, do enjoy the continuation of this series, part 3 of A Misunderstanding!
PS: It’s been a while since I’ve written so that quality might be bad...
PSS: If you have any questions or requests do leave them in my box, I’ll be sure to read and write them because I have nothing else to do during quarantine now
But anyways, do enjoy reading!
- Iman
_______________________________________________
Genre: Romance, Soulmate Au, Themes of Hanahaki Disease, Slight Angst
Pairing: Lee Minho (Stray Kids) x Reader
Word Count: 3195 words
Description: Y/N and Minho have been best friends for their entire life and have bonded as soulmates but there is one problem within this fantasy. Minho has been blinded and tricked by a fellow classmate by making him believe that he is her soulmate. A replica of Y/N and Minho’s soulmate bond has been tattooed on her body in spite of stealing him away from his original lover to fulfill her needs and crush on him. Now, if Y/N doesn’t find a way to bring Minho back to reality and become an official couple before the end of their high school careers, she will have to suffer from internal and external pain for the rest of her life because of the separation from her one and only. Will Y/N be able to make her best friend and her soulmate realize that she’s the one for him before it’s all too late? Or will she have to suffer the life-long consequences?
Prologue / Part 1 / Part 2
_______________________________________________
Minho’s POV
“Minho have you heard of soulmates? My grandma told me that two people who have the same mark on their body and fall in love with each other when they get older!” “That’s cool! I wonder if we have a mark or the same mark!” I remember hearing Y/N talk about the concept of soulmates when we were younger and it always intrigued me. After my mark was visible on the side of my torso, I always walked around town pulling up people’s sleeves and taking a quick glance at their arms to find a mark that was somewhat similar or identical to my own, however I couldn’t find anyone with any marks with birds flying and a bouquet of flowers so I started to lose faith and hope in the whole idea of soulmates. When senior year came along, I found Seoyun, my soulmate. I was ecstatic to finally find my soulmate after 17 years of finding them, but it affected my friendship with Y/N so badly I have caused her so much damage and pain. All this time, I was blinded by a girl who wanted me for my popularity and skills rather than falling in love with a gain who knew me inside and out and was always there for me no matter the time of day or the place I was at. However, I only realised my mistakes after seeing my best friend suffering alone at the hospital with a chance of either dying or losing all emotions due to her diagnosis of Hanahaki Disease. In order to find out more about my mistake and to learn in-depth, I decided to go back to the countryside quickly to visit my grandparents and the local shaman to talk about this issue.
An hour bus ride back to Gimpo from Seoul is enough time for me to read the book Jennie gave me when we saw each other in the hospital. She told me to read it in order to understand what soulmates are and the consequences of soulmate rejections. I remember seeing this book in my parents’ house because of their special bond. My mother and father consequently are soulmates and they found out about their faith in college and got married a few years after the whole incident. When I get back, I want to talk to both of them about their experiences with the whole concept of soulmates. Anyways here we go, hopefully by the end of this, I can understand fully about this concept Y/N dearly loved ever since she was a child, fix my mistakes and make it up to her no matter what it takes.
Gimpo Station, Gimpo Station. We will be arriving at Gimpo Station shortly.
Well, that’s my station, hopefully both my grandparents and parents are home so that I can talk to all of them. I need to do this quickly before something bad happens to Y/N while I’m out. I make my way to my small house where I used to grow up in in the countryside, a lot of memories flash through my mind especially my memories with Y/N. The playground reminded me of the times where I would play at the swings with Y/N and push her from behind, I still here her scream “Push me higher! I want to touch the skies'' in my head. Makes me chuckle knowing that sometimes she’d lose her grip and fall on her face. Damn… she means a lot to me but I’m so lost, confused and blinded. I walk through the gates of my house and open the doors, a familiar smell of the house hits my nostril and brings me back to my childhood days, “Eomma, I’m home!” I reunited with my parents after 3 years of not seeing them because of my studies in Seoul and my dancing career under JYP Entertainment. Brief hugs and kisses are given but after all of that commotion, I pull both my grandparents and parents into the living so that we could talk about my problems and issues back in Seoul. “Eomma, Appa, I wanted to ask you about relationships and soulmate bonds in specific... Can you tell me about your story about how you met, how you got together. Also can you explain why this whole soulmate thing is really important and why people who are bonded should be other and not with other people?”
“I see that you're having problems with Y/N and Seoyun, and you’re unsure who your real soulmate is. Don’t worry my child, we’ll help you find your true identity and loved one. I hope you have time on your hands because there’s a lot to talk about. So, sit down and pay attention to what we have to say.”
After hours sitting down with my parents and finally understanding the concept of soulmates with their expertise, I have come to a conclusion that I have in fact messed up and caused great pain to the person that has been by my side since we were young and always supported my dreams. I don’t know if she’ll ever forgive me for the pain and agony I have caused her but, I’ll do anything to make sure things are cleared between the both of us. I need to fix what I have caused and end things with Seoyun even if it means certain consequences. Before I take my leave back to Seoul, my parents give me their last advice and hand me a good luck charm hoping that I can mend things before things are too late.
“Minho, my baby, you need to know that the hanahaki disease may or may not take Y/N’s life after this considering the stage she’s currently in right now. It may hurt you and cause you pain after this as there were mishaps along the way that require consequences so do keep that in mind, but remember we’ll always be by your side and will help if you need anything from here onwards, okay?” My parents say while bringing me into a warm hug for support. I thank them and make my way out of the house and back to Seoul where I need to make things right with the girl I love.
Y/N’s POV
Bright lights start coming into view and hushed noises start surrounding me as I wake up.
“Hey babe, you’re finally awake. How are you feeling right now? Feeling better?” Jennie comes up to me from the chair across the room with a bottle of water in hand. I nod my head to her last question as my throat feels too dry to give a reply. “Here take this and drink up”
As I drink up the water she offers me, so many things start going around in my head. Am I okay? What’s going to happen to me after this? Is everything going to be alright? Am I even breathing properly?
“Where is Minho?” I ask Jennie.
She looked at me unsure of what to say which made me think he’s probably with Seoyun right now doing whatever. The thought of them together makes me so agitated that I started to cough out more flower petals in the process. Jennie looks at me frightened and runs out of the room in search of a nurse. As she leaves, I come to a decision that I can’t live like this anymore and decide to go through with the removal surgery regardless of the consequences that come with it. I look at the clock beside me and hope for whatever faith has in mind for my future.
Minho’s POV
After arriving in Seoul after a long bus ride, I start making my way to Seoyun’s house to break things off with her and start fixing things with the girl I was supposed to be with a long time ago. Along the way, I start to think of ways to make it up to Y/N and how to apologize to her for all of the troubles and pain I have caused her. Seeing Seoyun’s house in the distance, I dash up to her front step hoping to end things quickly and make my way to the hospital. I knock on the door and wait a bit for her to come down. While standing outside, I hear her come down quickly and hear a slight tud.
“Jagi what are you doing here? It’s late” Seoyun opens the door abruptly while looking slightly disheveled. I look at her up and down in confusion. While I am suspicious of her previous activities, I make my way into her home and sit on the couch telling her that we have to talk which makes her a bit uneasy.
“Seoyun, just tell me the truth, are you really my soulmate?” I ask while I look up at her while she’s fixing her hair and shirt. “Of course, I am. Why are you asking that so suddenly? Why are we even talking about this right now? Can we talk about this tomorrow morning, I need to sleep babe” She answers back. While I look at her I can tell she doesn’t feel comfortable and looks as if she wants me out of the house. Her uneasiness raises some suspicion in me and makes me think she’s hiding something from me.
“Why do you seem so uneasy and why do you want to talk about this tomorrow morning and not right now?” I ask her while taking some steps towards her. As she’s about to answer me, I hear a low voice talking in the background, “Babe, are you still talking to him? Are you not coming back upstairs?” I look around to see a head pop up at the staircase. Tensions start rising between the three of us and the puzzle pieces start coming together.
Seoyun looks back at me and the figure at the staircase and seems to come to a realization that things have gone wrong. I look back at Seoyun in anger and start asking her who that man was and what was going on right now. She looks back at me in fear and has nothing to say to the situation that unfolded. While she’s flabbergasted at the situation, I look back at the man and start approaching him to find out what was going on. “Who are you and what are you doing in my girlfriend’s house?” I ask him. He looks back at me, “I was going to ask the same thing”. We both look back at Seoyun hoping to get an answer to our questions and that’s when the truth starts coming out for the first time from her.
“Okay stop, Minho, you’re not my soulmate. I was just using you because I wanted the fame and wanted to have more status at school. Also, I was jealous of the bond you had with Y/N so I wanted to take that away from you and have it all to myself. I didn’t know how to do it but I found that pretending to be your soulmate was the way to have my plans to go the way I wanted them too.” Seoyun confesses with no remorse on her face. She looks at the man beside me with love in her eyes and quickly glances back at me “But now, since I found my true soulmate, I don’t need you anymore”. Her final sentences create so much emotion in my body that I didn’t know how to react. The man beside me could tell that things were settling in my mind and I was going to take action for her faults, so he reacted by holding me back before things went down.
“I can’t believe you did this to me and Y/N! Because of your selfiness, she’s in the hospital hurt and suffering because of you and your selfish gain. You have a soulmate now and you know the consequences that come with it if you reject him. If you rejected him, he would be in the hospital right now contemplating whether he wanted his emotions removed, but no, you found a way to use me and find your true soulmate. But guess what? That’s what Y/N is going through right now because of your bullshit! You hurt me and Y/N, I hope you understand the problems you’ve caused!” I start screaming at her while thrashing around in the man’s grip. I look back at the man holding me to see some pain and regret in his eyes for the things his soulmate has done to two innocent people who were minding their own businesses.
I jump out of the man’s hold and start making my way out of the house. Before I leave, I look back and say, “Seoyun, I hope you understand what you’ve done and let’s say things that you had in your plan will be crumbling down when I see you in school again.” With that, I walk out of the house and start making my way to the hospital to start fixing things with Y/N. I take out my phone and start looking through my contact list. “Chan, I’m on the way to the hospital. I broke up with Seoyun and found out the truth behind my relationship with her. Now, I need to fix my friendship with Y/N before it’s all too late.”
Y/N’s POV
Jennie manages to find a nurse who comes to help calm down my coughing fit and keep things in place for the time being. After she helps with my coughing fit, she starts to check my vitals to make sure everything is okay and to see if my condition is stable after what has happened. I looked at the nurse and asked her to bring my doctor in as I needed to talk to him about my decision. The nurse nods at my request and makes her way out of the room to find my doctor. After a while, the doctor makes their way into the room and takes a seat at the edge of my bed.
“You called me in Y/N to discuss something?” The doctor asks. I look back up at him and say that I wanted to go through with the removal surgery. “Alright then, I’ll get the documents ready and we will go through with the surgery.” He touched my lower leg as a way of an understanding and support and made his way out of the room. I lay back on my bed and contemplate whether I have made the right choice.
I heard a door swing open. I look up to see Chan and Jennie standing at the door catching their breaths.
“Y/N please don't go through with the surgery please. It’s not worth it”. Chan and Jennie saying hoping to persuade me out of the decision I just made. “I can’t guys. I just told the doctors I wanted to go through with it. Plus, Minho is with Seoyun, I don’t have the power and strength to keep this up anymore. I need to get rid of the flowers in my chest even if it means no more romantic feelings.” I say as I look at the room around me too scared to look at them in the eyes. “Y/N, Minho’s on the way to the hospital. You don’t have to do this. He said that he called it quits with Seoyun and wants to fix his friendship and build a relationship with you. He knows how much he fucked up and how blinded he was to not see that the love of his life was helping and aiding him the whole time and was right in front of him. He knows the whole soulmate thing by heart now and wants to make things right for you and him.” Chan says to me while making his way towards the bed. He takes my hand in his and looks me in the eyes and says, “Don’t go through with this surgery Y/N because now it will hurt the both of you.”
I take my hand away from his grip and look at the both of them.
“Sorry guys what’s done is done. I am going through this no matter what.”
Minho’s POV
After making it to the hospital, I get on the lift and make my way to Y/N floor. As the elevator doors open, I see a stretcher being taken away from a familiar room, and realize who was on that stretcher. “Y/N don’t please! I’ve come to make amends” I shout from the lift. As I shout, I see the doctors and nurse look back from the stretcher and point in my direction to show Y/N that someone was here for them. I see her head pop out from the strecther and lay right back down on it. I start running towards them and ask the doctors to give us a moment. The doctors agreed and walked away to allow us to settle some things.
“Y/N I know I fucked up and I know I caused you so much pain without even realizing it, but I want things to work between us and restore the things we were supposed to do together as soulmates. I just broke up with Seoyun and found out the truth from her. I know you might not forgive but please give me another chance so I can make it up to you. Please call off the surgery and let’s fix things together.” I begged while holding onto the handles of the stretcher. I feel a few tears running down my face as I try to hold in my sobs. I could help but feel like an asshole as I hurt the person that loved me more than anyone, and to see her goes through this surgery pains me even more. While sch thoughts are going through my mind, I feel a hand on my face wiping my tears away. I open my eyes to see Y/N with her arm out with a slight smile on her face.
Before I could say anything to her, she spoke up. “Even after all the times we’ve been through together and even having those connecting thoughts or even finishing each other sentences, this took you a while to understand which makes me question if you’re really my soulmates.” She says while touching my face. She lets out a small giggle which warms my heart.
I take her hand in mind and I look straight into her eyes, “Y/N I know I’m in the wrong but I want to make things work between us even if it means damaging my health for you. We can make things work out and I finally understand that you’re the one for me. I’m sorry for what I’ve done. Please forgive me and call this surgery off. I’ll nurse and help you back into good health and fix things between us first, and you can decide our future together after that.”
#stray kids#lee minho#lee know x reader#a misunderstanding ff#lee minho x reader#bang chan#pt3#kpop imagines#kpop scenarios#stray kids imagines#stray kids scenarios#blackpink jennie#soulmate a#hanahaki disease
43 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hello! May I have a student Male bnha matchup?// I’m a 5’8 female with brown hair in a bob cut and glasses. I also have blue eyes!// at first I come off as very shy/distant But when you get to know me I’m really open and bubbly. I LOVE making new friends and I consider myself to be really nice! I love making people smile and feel better. I love encouraging people and I’m caring. I’m loyal and protective. Idk how to express love super well but I have random cuddle and possessive streaks, 1/3
I have trust issues but when you break those I’m really open and will never let you go! I have anxiety and ADHD so I can be a bit hard to deal with. It’s hard for me to have a panic attack but when I do I break down and cling to the nearest person. When I have possessive streaks I normally won’t let them leave and will cuddle them telling them how much I adore them and how lucky I am to have them. Same for cuddle streaks. Im not always but can be very possessive and jealous. Nothin extreme tho 2/3
My hobbies are listening to music, cuddling, making people happy, writing, ill take notes on random animals and learn about one specific one for like a day or two and just have a shit ton of notes and knowledge about them. I’m a internet ADDICT. I love reading fanfiction, I write it, I’m super into anime, love sweet food, I like cleaning A LOT, and that’s all! Thank you for your time love!🥰 3/3
~~~
alrightyy first one of the bunch and i honestly am super excited for these and i honestly
~~~
i match you up with..
teny iida !!
- this boy is kinda socially uninclined
- but he did manage to become great friends with midoriya who is really timid so he would try his best to get along with you and make you feel as comfortable as possible
- he admires how you like making others smile and he would try to put a smile on your face himself
- he too is encouraging and you’re essentially kinda like the cheer squad for everyone and the person goes to you for advice
- he too is loyal to you and he will coMMit to all the dates you guys set
- he never forgets a single date and he would cancel everything else for you two to spend time together
- he is up for everything you are up to but honestly the first 2 cuddle sessions he is a little stiff
- ever since the incident with his brother it was hard for him to let people go, like he has separation anxiety so he is really clingy
- he is a grounded and focused person so he always helps you focus and he will sit through your bursts of energy and if it is that bad he would honestly remind you to take your meds
- the only music he probably listens to is rock because of his brother
- he can’t help it he just looks to him.
- if you make him a playlist he would melt
- he likes it when you cuddle up to him and he honestly would bust multiple uwu’s
- he would force you to sleep at a normal time and make you sleep in the same bed with him and he would hold you in his arms
- he is a little bit of a control freak and he would make a great partner
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
rp guidelines.
Mun is Ash. She/Her. 21+. Ruthless Drama King keeps me prisoner.
This blog is 21+ Nsfw/smut will not be written with those under 21 years old. I will not write with minors.
I know there are a lot of rules here now but incidents, past stuff in rp scene kind of made it mandatory for myself to put down. Common sense lacks in some too so sorry it’s so long but ya know. Gotta do what we rpers gotta do. <3
tw: potential for triggering content & subject matter due to crime scene investigations/forensic profiling. strong language expected. he is simply a problematic aggressive character in most verses.
no godmodding. unspoken rule but please do not control my character under any circumstances. if you continue to break this rule however I may have to cancel our thread. only in extreme cases.
Don’t have personal triggers but I will not write my muse forcing themselves on any other muse.
any personal triggers you are uncomfortable with I will not write and vice versa.
multiverse/oc friendly. au friendly: discussion on AU’s are love. same char different mun friendly. duplicates are always welcome. personally I love OC’s and this boy cannot get enough interaction from them ever. just so you know.
Do not screenshot my posts: ooc, threads etc. It is MY content. I should not have to add this but yes this has happened without my knowledge - at first.
Unfollowing: If there is something you disagree with, do not favor about my writing, portrayal, muse(s) or views the button is always there. Please soft block to unfollow. I will do the same and quietly if it calls for it.
PSA: Don’t call 60 Connor. He is not Connor. He is his own person. This sort of trumps the significance I have built for him as an individual entity in my characterization/ headcanons/ personal iteration in a fandom where he is overlooked. Also if you do refer to him as such verbally to his face you consent to the wrath and animosity he will bestow upon you be it verbal or potentially physical. Trust me 60 is not fond of being mistaken for his predecessor. (It’s a pet peeve and I’m sorry lol but they’re two separate people. I mean I write Connor too so bear with me.)
plots are love. let's discuss story, char relationships, just anything really. down for plotted, random prompts and memes. my dm’s are always open. if I don’t respond straight away I’m either not on at the moment or I’m just swamped in drafts. I still want you to drop in tho.
replies may take a bit. this is a hobby. if I take a while it doesn’t mean I don’t want to rp. sometimes I forget, tumblr eats my notifs or I haven’t thought up a decent reply as of yet. please be patient. I always offer the same to my rp partners. also I do get swamped in drafts and asks so this does contribute to my reply speed. TLDR: I am slow af but I want to write with you.
want to drop a thread? we all lose muse, get too busy, overwhelmed at times. it is perfectly OK. when I do thread purges I will always post an update and @ those I am keeping threads with. the number of follows I have it is just easier for me to do it this way.
shipping: will ship with chars but there are some I may turn down depending on personal preference. typically ships with another RK800/RK900 are a no. sibling, platonic, enemies is where I go. some exceptions may apply depending on verse type but his exclusive and only RK800 ship is with @rob0badge . 60 also would like platonic, friend and enemy ships to counter his romantic ships. any and all are appreciated.
open to smut threads. 21+ very explicit at times depending on verse. 60 is ruthless. fair warning. also smut is not a requirement for romantic ships. if you’re not down for that then 60 is all about the respect of his partner’s wishes.
multiship friendly: winning rk800-60's affection is not easy in the long run. remember he is not easy to get along with.
Shipping Additions: I WILL NOT ship cross unless it is plotted mutually between all parties. even then I will be selective about it. please respect this. multiverse is a thing and that is what my blog is. it will just be ignored.
Content Trigger: 60 is very much ruthless despite his fall into deviancy. if you are uncomfortable with intense personalities this may not be the rp blog for you. certain themes will be highly thematic, problematic and even controversial at times. all of these will be tagged accordingly and put under read more for my followers/mutuals. he will be aggressive and hateful depending on circumstances. he is not very nice. however, the mun does not reflect this characterization and is extremely nice to followers. 60 may not share that affinity but the mun has no malicious intent. Only this ruthless boy does.
threads containing 18/21+ material always go under read more. please adhere to all warnings. some subject matter may be unsettling. remember any dark or triggering themes are NOT condoned by me irl. it just needs to be said.
Interactions: non-rp blogs, personals or those not part of current threads: DO NOT REBLOG. this is becoming a problem lately and I really don’t want to be that person but please follow this rule.If you continue to do so you will be BLOCKED. You can like my posts just fine however. In fact it’s welcome! I like to see others enjoying what I write for the ruthless king.
DBH VERSE REQUIRED: It just works better to be able to write adequately and since my muse is from this universe it’s a given. I rarely do crossovers as I feel some just do not work or fit my muse. If I do they are with main mutuals depending on fandom or personal preference.
Mutual Exclusive/RP Blogs Only: This blog is now private. If you follow me and I do the same back it means I want to interact. Otherwise assume I won’t be following back if I haven’t in a week. I have had some odd things come 60′s way and it is why this blog is locked down now.
Follows: If I follow back it means I want to interact with you. If you're a mutual and you still have not interacted with me after several weeks I WILL unfollow. This is nothing against anyone or meant to be unfair/mean spirited. The blog is an rp blog so of course I want to interact with you all. Also I do not just give free follows since this is not a personal blog.
I would love to follow back depending but if I see no rules or somewhere that states 21 and above for the mun on your blog I won’t. I interact solely with those 21+. I myself am 28 years old. Respect this and don’t lie about your age to me. I have had people lie to me in the past and they’ve been dropped faster then you can shout “Deviant Spotted!”
I reserve the right to unfollow anyone for whatever reason including but not limited to rp politics. Ya gurl not here for rp snobbery or assumptions made. If I become uncomfortable I will soft block to unfollow quietly. I also practice block back. Meaning if I’m hardblocked (which is in anyone’s right who is uncomfortable with my content) I will hardblock back. It’s only fair and honestly it’s a lovely page taken out of one of my waifu’s books.
OOC: If you post a crap ton of ooc posts (I mean plz it’s your blog and your content is yours so go for it) I may unfollow if I cannot blacklist them properly. I mean things that aren’t rp related. This is only in extreme cases. My blog has overwhelmed me so the dash being flooded is something I want to clean up.
Replies: As I have stated in updates on this blog I am super busy and backed up. My reply speed is slower due to lots of drafts and asks. You can remind me but please don’t come at me or try to push me. Muse can be fickle. Some days I have it for a specific verse, others I have it for shorter convos or text threads. I aim to reply to everyone but keep in mind running this blog is not easy and I want it be fun for me. It’s a hobby. When I have to worry and hide from people this is no longer that. If it continues I will drop the thread completely. Only in extreme cases.
Pressuring: Do not come into my inbox on anon passive aggressively asking when I will reply to threads. If you honestly want to remind me like a normal person my dms are open to mutuals only. Do not guilt me into rping. If you pressure and attempt manipulating me you will be blocked. This has happened and I will not put up with it.
Please reblog any memes/prompts from the source and not this blog. I am not an rp source or creator of these. If you continue to do this and just harvest my blog for memes without even interacting I will unfollow/block. If you reblog send me one then. If not well do not do it. non-mutuals do not reblog anything at all from this blog. Also I have to mention some people have used me as a source WITHOUT reblogging from me. Meaning they see the meme and reblog it for themselves as a means of bypassing sending in anything. If we’re mutuals why are you doing this? It will just make me think you do not want to interact.
Asks: Do not reblog asks. Please if you wish to continue make a new post and link back to ask. It just makes my dash a little cleaner and I want to avoid extra asks in the inbox continuing it when we can turn them into convo threads. So please don’t keep sending asks to continue a plot line. Thread it.
IMPORTANT NOTE ABOUT HATE & ASSUMPTIONS: If I discover you sending hate on anon to anybody you’re gone. If you send hate to people about what they ship, especially to female muns/muses, you’re gone. I will not tolerate hate of any kind and if I see you talking negatively about any female muse I will soft block you quietly. I just do not want to interact with you. People who assume generalized posts are about them when I follow you will be softblocked as well. Honestly it’s a given that if I’m following it’s not directed at you. I will not put up with assumptions or continue to view it on my dash. Unfollow me, softblock me, etc. It’s not difficult. My comfort levels are important to me as well as yours should be.
I will not interact with egoists. If I see anything that wigs me out I will just softblock quietly. Elitists go home. I don’t want you here.
I will never rush or be pushy at my partners. I’m so chill about threads. please take your time. let’s never take the fun out of it. never think you’re taking too long or bothering me. DM’s are open to my mutuals only.
I do not do passwords or send messages of any kind. If I am following you rest assured that I have read your rules. I do this automatically when someone follows me and vice versa since I expect the same. If I’m liking update posts you can consider that me seeing it as well.
unfollowing/refollowing: Don’t do it on my blog. If you follow and then unfollow but for some reason come back to follow you get blocked from my side. I don’t need the bs or the attention seeking.
Duplicates are amazing but I will be selective who I follow back and interact with. Nothing personal but I have been the victim of theft in the past. It’s an unfortunate thing but my characterization and headcanons for 60 are my own. I have been writing this boy forever even long before I made this blog. I’m highly protective of my ruthless king. He is my baby after all.
softblocks: I remove people by doing this. It could be for any reason to be honest. We never interact, you keep dropping our stuff, show no interest, I don’t see us interacting after all or any number of reasons to make my dash more comfortable. Do not ask me why I did it. That’s my comfort. No hard feelings. Just move on. I don’t have to cater to you. If you don’t like my methods use the unfollow button and leave my blog. Simple enough.
hardbocking/blacklisting: Yes I have done it. Am I going to blatantly broadcast it for all to see? Nope. I am not obligated to explain why I blocked you. Most times you have broken my rules despite me reminding to read them. Other times there are people I just do not want to see and that is my right not to see them. Same goes for you. Block me if you do not like what you see. I will not censor myself, my writing or who I interact with.
ostracizing people in the rpc: If you don’t like who I am interacting with use your blacklist function. NEVER tell me not to interact with them. If I find out you practice this exclusion tactic on others in the rpc I will purge you off my blog no questions or explanation needed. I totally get it. There are people I don’t like. No one is going to like everyone but do you see me telling others NOT to write with them? Hell no because I know for a fact they have done it to me and others love to listen without all sides to a story.
I also drop people who vague in public servers because it’s straight up childish behavior. I also will not follow or interact with anyone who guilt trips, suicide baits or lies with a pity party song and dance. When you’re found out to be lying or telling other people not to interact with somebody in this RPC I want nothing to do with you. Move on. That’s it.
Drop a like if you made it this far. Whew! No passwords needed. Even if you don’t drop a like it won’t prevent me interacting it’s just nice to see.
#[ooc files]#{~status: updates}#{~status: guidelines}#{{rule post to be linked for a more mobile friendly view}}#{{new rules fully integrated}}#{{thank you loves}}
53 notes
·
View notes
Text
How to Communicate with Others and the Psychology Behind It (Part 1)
These are notes taken from some lectures went to for college courses all about the psychology behind communicating with others, how to assess other people before even speaking to them, how to improve communication and how to de-escalate situations when needed.
“If you are not under your own emotional control, you’re a puppet for another.”
This was the first thing he opened the first lecture with. If you are emotional, this will steer how you perceive the world and others. Everyone has emotional baggage, everyone has their faults and flaws and many struggle with their emotions. Even the most put together business person or confident lawyer often don’t know how to control their own emotions. It is not something we are born with, it is something we need to learn to do. The first parts of our lesson in communication is emotions and what beliefs are.
What Are Beliefs
He had us sit down and for a long time on a piece of paper write down all of our beliefs, everything that we believe. He didn’t ask for explanations, he just wanted us to write things down. He didn’t specify much but he sat back and watched us. Once time was up he stood up from his desk and returned to his lecturing spot.
“Raise your hand, how many of you wrote down things related to religion, love and afterlife somewhere in the top 3 first things you wrote down.” Everyone in the classroom raised their hands. He nodded “those are often the first things people think about when they write down beliefs, they look at the big picture. How many of you wrote down things about people, humanity and the world?” Nearly everyone had their hands up again. “Yes, that is because that is the next thing people’s minds go to. Yes while all of those are beliefs, and important ones, they all have meanings to you; they are not the only beliefs. Let me tell you a few of my beliefs, things that I live by every day.” He went up to the board and began to write these next few statements.
I believe that stretching each morning helps me wake up
I believe that blue is a color that looks good on me
I believe that lighting candles calms me down
I believe that singing badly to a song is a special joy
He motioned to these believes “They don’t seem too important do they? These don’t change the world, they don’t affect how I do my job and frankly these are things only people who really deeply know me would say are part of who I am.” he got a lot of murmurs and nods to this. “But, that’s why they are important. They are part of who you are. They are a part of you.”
He began talking to us about how how can we decide how to judge others or even read and communicate with others if we can’t communicate with ourselves. Do we know who we are? Do we know what all of our beliefs are? Do we know what little pieces of ourselves that we tend to overlook are things that we still feel are important to put “I believe” in front of.
Our homework after this lecture was to list out all of these believes, the big and the small and post them in our room or in a notebook. That way, whenever we needed to remind ourselves of who we are, or to help connect to our thoughts to look at them.
Everyone Carries Weight
He opened this lecture again with the same quote as above. Now that we knew some of our believes we need to understand something about ourselves and about others - we all carry weight. Everyone does, even the happiest people carry weight. He looked out at us and said: “We all carry weight, and we shouldn’t. If we were perfect we’d let go of it and drop it after it happened. But we are not perfect, so we carry this weight”
It drags us down. Some people go through terrible things, but, we all have to let go. This doesn’t mean forget this means, release it and eventually cut the line of that weight and march on ahead. There are healthy ways to let go of this weight, speaking to a therapist is one of these things even if we are ashamed or feel lost, we have to address this weight.
“How can you give others a chance when all you can do is focus on the bad?” Yes, I know many on this site will start chiming in how terrible that is and how you can’t fix depression just like that. He never said that, he said to address what weighs you down. Illnesses and past experiences can weigh us down and ignoring them or throwing them out into conversation constantly does not help anyone and certainly not ourselves. We can make excuses that we behave poorly or talk terribly to someone because of these weights but we can also admit to ourselves that we have them and work on them. Ignoring something doesn’t fix it. Addressing it does.
This point of the lecture he spoke about his own experiences and how vivid memories he had of a time that he was being choked out by someone, so bad that he couldn’t breath and he nearly died that day. How it haunted him and how if it wasn’t for another person who intervened he would’ve. He went to the hospital and had to stay there for a week to recover and how for a long time he was diagnosed with PTSD and he still struggles with it. But, he has learned how to help himself, and how he mustn’t focus back on it more than healthy releases. He can’t let one incident hold him back.
How do these things relate to communicating with others?
He asked us this since to many this would seem like odd subjects to bring up when you want to learn about other people, about observing them and about conversations. He got a lot of nods and he went up to the board again and wrote out:
“We don’t see the world as reality, just what is in our heads.”
He motioned to this while speaking. All our experiences, no matter how big or small, and all of our beliefs as people and the emotions we have result in how we see the world. No one sees the same world. If we were perfect, like machines, we all would just see it for what it is. We all could look at a painting and see it just for what is visually put there. But we’re not machines we get emotions from looking at this painting. Some may find it romantic, some nostalgic, others may find it drab. These opinions are our brains changing reality to fit what we understand.
He clarified this by asking how many of us had a conversation or situation with a parent, friend, loved one etc then later on heard them retell it and all you can think is “that’s not what happened”. It happens all the time, that’s because they interpreted what happened differently than we did. They may have seen themselves in the right for yelling at that waiter but you may see it in the wrong because you observed it from a different perspective and a different belief.
Our brains don’t record things in the world perfectly. Every few seconds we take in a million details and we can’t take in all of it, so our brains toss out what they don’t believe are important. All brains - delete, distort and generalize. That is how it is, there is no turning this off, there is no magic fix. We are all human, we all do this. But, because our brains do this is why we all often have little control over ourselves specifically our emotions. Someone who is very religiously devout is more likely to feel targeted by things anti-religious and take it personally, someone who loves dogs will take someone else saying they aren’t a dog person more personally - the list goes on. People will react emotionally different to different things, and this is where we sabotage ourselves.
Confirmation Bias: a bias our brains have subconsciously about things. When reality doesn’t go along with a belief our brain will change it or distort it.
Example of this happening he brought up if anyone ever heard a name of someone and immediately thought of how terrible that person was. Just bad and awful memories so every time you met someone new with that name you mind instantly goes to that other person. Do you ever decide that, that person on some level is just like the other “Jake” or “Lisa” or whoever it was? Yes, you have because you are human. You’re brain is already distorting reality and you need to realize that it is.
Have you ever saw someone who looked just like someone who perhaps bullied you or was really mean to you? So this new person you ignore them or get sarcastic with them or snippy with them because you just see on some level that other person. That is you subconsciously changing reality from “this person is a different separate person” to “this person is just like the other because x, y and z”.
First step for improving communication is to stop doing this. Once you realize you are remind yourself, “no this person is in-fact not ____ they are two different people.” It will take some practice for you to catch yourself doing it. Many people don’t realize that do it at all unless it is pointed out to them. It is our jobs, as people, to take control of ourselves. Remind yourself, this person is someone new, let us make new memories with this person.
This will help you communicate with new people in a better way. Stopping yourself from focusing on things this new person is not. You do not know them yet, don’t make your judgement on them by something out of their control.
“To people, changing reality is easier than to change their beliefs.”
But sometimes we do have to change our beliefs so that we can improve ourselves and how we speak with others.
210 notes
·
View notes
Text
Best. Job. Ever 9/13
Summary: Reader gets a job on the set of Spider-Man: Far from Home for the 3 weeks they are shooting in New York City as what she thinks is a production assistant, but a twist of fate has her reassigned as Tom Holland’s personal assistant. As she & Tom grow close during filming, will their budding friendship turn to more or will they go their separate ways after filming concludes?
Warnings: Language, but that’s pretty much it? This is basically a PG-13 rom-com. (Legal) alcohol use as well but since it’s legal do I really need to tag it?
Word Count: 1600 for chapter 9.
Author’s Note: As this was written WAY before Spider-Man: Far from Home was released (actually before Avengers: Endgame was as well) I’ve kept plot details and which scene was being shot on what day extremely vague. Also, I’m American but tried to write Tom as British as possible, although I do think he’d try to stay(ish) in character and use as much American slang as he could while he’s still playing Peter.
Chapter-Specific Author’s Note: :|
Requests are always open!
Cross-posted at AO3.
Y/N had just gotten dressed to go meet Tom and Harrison for brunch when her phone chimed with a text alert. A bright grin bloomed on her face when she unlocked it.
Tom: Good morning.
Hi, she typed back.
Tom: I’m heading downstairs. Want me to go ahead and order your coffee when I get to the restaurant?
Sure. I’ll be right down.
She did a quick check in the mirror before grabbing her purse and heading out the door and down to the restaurant, where Tom and Harrison were already seated. Y/N’s coffee was waiting for her, already fixed to her liking.
Y/N glanced at Tom as she sat down, who gave her a shy smile as he sipped his own coffee.
They had a pleasant but mostly quiet brunch. Y/N kept sneaking glance at Tom whenever she thought he & Harrison weren’t looking, remembering the kiss from the night before and blushing into her french toast. Professional, Y/N, she kept reminding herself. Keep it cool in public.
At one point she looked up and noticed Harrison watching her. He glanced back & forth between her & Tom and raised an eyebrow.
Y/N felt herself blush again. Shit, he caught me staring at Tom. She was relieved when Harrison turned to Tom and asked a question about plans they had made for when Tom was back in London.
The rest of brunch passed without incident, and as they stood to leave Y/N gave Harrison a long hug and a quick peck on the cheek. “It was so great getting to meet you.”
“It was great getting to meet you too,” Harrison replied. “Stay in touch, and if you’re ever in London let me know.”
“Sure will. Have a safe flight.” Y/N turned to Tom. “I’ll see you later for our meeting?”
“Yeah, sure,” Tom replied.
“Bye, guys.” Y/N headed back up to her room to get some work done before her meeting with Tom.
She set her reminders for the upcoming week then decided to start reading one of the books she had bought at the Strand the previous day. She became so absorbed in the story that she was startled when her phone rang.
“Mmmlo?” she answered.
“Y/N,” came Laura’s voice. “Have you seen the Celebrity News Report website today?”
“Of course not,” Y/N replied. “You know I don’t read that gossip rag that calls itself a news site.”
“Well you have to at least see today’s front headline. Here, I’m linking it to you.”
Y/N’s phone chimed with a message and she tapped on the link.
HAS SPIDER-MAN FOUND HIS SPIDER-LOVE?
“Oh shit,” Y/N blurted. Above the article was a grainy photo of her & Tom at the nightclub the night before. From the looks of it, it was taken right before their almost-kiss. Luckily, it was dark and of super poor quality like it had been taken with a cell phone from a distance and Y/N’s face was turned away from the camera, so there really was no way to identify who was in the photo. Y/N quickly scanned the article.
Spider-Man actor Tom Holland, who is in New York City filming Spider-Man: Far From Home, was spotted getting awfully cozy with a mystery (Y/H/C) at an undisclosed NYC hotspot last night. Sources say that Holland, 22, has been spotted at several different NYC restaurants over the past few weeks with the same woman. Has he moved on from co-star & rumored flame Zendaya, or is he playing the field? Keep it here at the Celebrity News Report to find out more as the story progresses!
Y/N groaned. “They didn’t even mention that Harrison was there as well. I danced with him too, you know.”
“I know,” Laura replied. “You didn’t post anything on your Instagram from the club though, did you?”
“No, of course not. I only sent you that selfie.” Y/N sighed. “I actually haven’t posted anything on Insta since I’ve been in New York.”
“Besides, it’s not like there’s anything going on between you two anyway.”
Y/N was silent.
“Wait, right?” Laura asked. “Y/N… Nothing *is* going on, right?”
“Umm, well…” Y/N hesitated. “Tom and I kissed last night.”
“WHAT?!?”
Y/N quickly moved the phone away from her ear so she wouldn’t go deaf from Laura’s pterodactyl screech.
“I want deets, girl! SPILL!”
“Ok, well, when we first got to the club Harrison insisted that we all do tequila shots to start.”
Laura clicked her tongue. “Y/N, you know what happens when you drink tequila. Remember the Delta Pi party sophomore year? You almost wound up naked with the captain of the collegiate swim team!”
“Ugh, don’t remind me. I chased it with lime juice this time like I’m supposed to, how was I supposed to know it’d still hit me like it did? I’m used to the cheap stuff!”
Laura laughed. “Anyway, go on.”
“So we did a couple of shots, then Tom left to go get me a drink while Harrison went dancing. Oh, then this creepy dude hit on me and Tom pretended to be my boyfriend when he got back. Then Harrison came back and Tom and I hit the dance floor, which is probably when the picture was taken. We…err… we *almost* kissed on the dance floor but someone bumped into us, so I said I was hot and needed to go to the restroom. We had a few more drinks in between dancing and it was late when we got back to the hotel. We all took the elevator up and Harrison got off at his floor and told us good night, and Tom and I had initially parted ways once we got up to our floor, but Tom had my phone and ID and stuff so he walked over to give it to me so I could get into my room and one thing led to another and… he kissed me.” Y/N sighed at the memory.
Laura squealed. “Ooh, girl, you are so lucky!” She paused. “Hey, listen, I’ve got to go, there’s an early call time on set today, but I want to hear more later, k?”
“Ok,” Y/N replied.
“I’ll talk to you later. Bye!”
Y/N hung up and flopped back on her bed. Shit, what am I going to do? She’d have to lay low for the rest of the filming. She couldn’t be seen in public with Tom or else someone might figure out that she was the girl in the picture, suss out her identity and create a media frenzy of speculation. Neither she nor Tom needed to deal with that, Tom being a pretty private person outside of scheduled interviews and what he personally shared on Instagram and Twitter and Y/N beginning a new job in a few weeks. She definitely didn’t want to be the subject of company gossip when she was just starting out.
Her phone dinged with a text.
Tom: Hey, Haz just left for the airport. Can I come by?
Y/N replied, Give me like 15 minutes?
Tom: Sure.
Y/N hauled herself out of bed, took what was probably her fastest shower on record, and dressed in flannel lounge pants and an oversized sweatshirt.
Not long after she had dressed, there was a knock on her door. “Y/N? It’s me,” came Tom’s voice.
She opened the door. Tom stepped in, holding 2 coffees.
He held up had holding one of the coffees. “I was downstairs and thought you might like this.”
“Thanks so much,” Y/N said, taking it.
Tom rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. “Before we get to next week’s schedule can we talk about something?”
Shit, shit, he saw the article, Y/N thought. Of course he did, his agent probably stays on top of any kind of news about Tom.
“I suppose you’ve seen the gossip sites this afternoon...”
Y/N nodded. “I hadn’t, but Laura called me a while ago about that picture floating around the internet of us dancing at the club last night.”
“Well… umm,,, also speaking of last night -- I mean, after we got back from the club, that is…” Tom looked uncomfortable.
Shit, he regrets kissing me, Y/N thought. Give him an out. She waved him off. “Oh, the kiss? That was no big deal. Don’t worry about it.”
“No big deal?” Tom echoed.
“Psh, yeah. We both had been drinking, and ya know, with oxytocin and sciencey brain chemical stuff combined, things happen. We can just forget about it, chalk it up to a drunken mistake.”
“Right.” Tom fiddled with the sleeve on his coffee cup for a second, then pointed his thumb towards the door. “You know, actually, I just remembered I have something to do now, so I’m gonna go. You can just email me my schedule for next week, yeah? I’ll see you later.”
And with that, he turned, and for the first time in almost two weeks, Tom left without at least giving Y/N a hug goodbye.
As the door clicked shut, a pang hit Y/N in the solar plexus. She wanted to run after Tom and tell him that she didn't mean it, that the alcohol had long since worn off so she had kissed him with a totally clear head, and that it had been the best kiss of her life and that she would remember it forever.
Instead she curled up in her bed and cried herself to sleep.
Taglist: @laureharrier @thoughstofaredhead & @greenarrowhead
#tom holland rpf#tom holland fanfiction#tom holland fanfic#tom holland x reader#tom holland x you#avengers fanfiction#marvel fanfiction
23 notes
·
View notes
Last Seen Blogs
fuckyeahsasunaru
unbreakable bonds
madness-ensues-blog
Ican'teven
10203009
春夏秋冬
cplusukcapsules
C+ Triple Performance
250 MG Pills UK- Reviews or Price
adore-end0rphins
Dont Dream It, Be It.