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#woman that would genuinely manipulate god if she could

allysunny · 3 months

Note

heyyy hope ur well <3 i looooove ur writing so much it’s amazing! i had a request for bruce if that’s ok 24 & 2 + a book i was reading gave me an idea lol so could the reader be in an unhealthy abusive toxic relationship and falls for bruce who treats her soooo well and loves her soooo much unlike who she is currently with (she could have a reason why she can’t leave her partner maybe she’s so scared) and bruce is there for her always protecting her looking out for her worrying about her spoiling her he he genuinely is in love with her and you can add all ur magic to it and all ur awesome ideas. anyway if it’s not something u think fit ur writing or u don’t have enough time don’t worry it’s totally ok :))))) <3 <3 have a great day xx

For the Better

“You light up even the darkest of days” + “Please don’t leave me” + Kiss on the lips x Bale!Bruce Wayne

Pairing: Bale!Bruce Wayne x Fem!Reader

Words: 22.1k words

Warnings: Abusive & toxic relationship, domestic violence, gaslighting, lying, manipulation, I'm talking really, really unhealthy relationship, angst, bruises and some blood, fluff, angst with happy ending, kissing, I literally don't know how else to tag this, but please read the warnings because this is a very fucked up relationship.

A/N: Hey everyone! This is the last entry for my 200 Followers Event. I want to thank everyone who participated and all those who showed their support. That means the world to me.

Now, oh my god. This is my magnum opus, I believe. It took me a whole week to write this. This fic is the apple of my eye, my baby, my sin, my soul, I would die for this. I think it's my best work so far. I have worked my ass off for this, I really have, and I have no words to convey just how special and dear this fic is to me.

I would also like to apologise if there are any inconsistencies - I started writing it last Monday and finished it Saturday, so it's been nearly a week and I might've forgotten small details as the days went on. I tried to proofread it!

I really hope you guys will enjoy it and cherish it as much as I did. <3

To Bruce, you were the most gorgeous woman in the entire world.

Your eyes could rival even the brightest star in the sky, the sun did not hold a candle to how radiant your smile was, and no flower could compare to your beautiful. You were simply gorgeous, inside, and out.

Unfortunately, you weren’t his.

Bruce had met you during a charity event. Some wealthy couple was raising funds for the Gotham Police Department (even though Bruce did not believe half of them deserved such charity), and he had of course been invited. The couple in question could not care less about philanthropy – they were merely trying to appear that way. That’s Gotham, for you.

You’d been waitressing during the event, carrying trays of hors-d'œuvre and champagne, smiling politely at guests and trying to do your job the best you could. You’d walked by him twice, and although you weren’t really paying attention to the guests (you were far more preoccupied with not tripping and making a scene), he couldn’t take his eyes off you.

He was so mesmerised, that he found himself searching for you whenever he wasn’t talking to anyone else. Sometimes when you returned to the kitchen, he saw you talking to your coworkers, smiling, and giggling about.

After a few hours of being bored to death by patrons with faux smiles and untrue compliments, he was ready to call it a night and return to the loneliness of his mansion – and that’s when you caught his attention.

Or rather, everyone’s attention.

You’d bumped into someone’s shoulder (it was actually someone’s shoulder who had bumped into you) and spilled the tray of appetisers on top of an old man who wasn’t pleased with the situation. The man, who he recognised as Charles Carnegie – a crooked businessman famous for his dabbles with illegal gambling and corruption – yelled at you, insulting you with every name in the book. The man was just about to raise his hand, no doubt to strike you across your face, when Bruce intervened, rushing between the two of you and gripping the man’s arm.

Charles looked up in confusion and his turbulent eyes widened in recognition.

“Mr. Wayne!” he exclaimed, voice dripping with anger, “Let go of me this instant. Did you not see what happen? This foolish girl was not paying attention and spilled her tray all over me. I do not know how such incompetent staff can be hired. Someone ought to teach this insubordinate brat a lesson!”

Bruce’s hold on the man’s arm only tightened. How dare he speak to you like that? You were standing behind him, head hung low and muttering a string of apologies that were barely audible.

“Mr. Carnegie, if anyone here deserves to be taught a lesson, it is you.” He said, eyes narrowing. “Your inebriation and inability to watch where you’re going is not this woman’s fault. If you cannot behave at a public function, perhaps you shouldn’t think of attending. This server is not at fault, and you will apologize to her.”

The older man scoffed and tried stepping away from Bruce’s grip but failing.

“How dare you! Mr. Wayne, this – this – this harlot bumped into me! My suit is ruined, and she has insulted my dignity. Let go of me this instant, Mr. Wayne, or else – “

“Or else what?” Bruce asked, his voice dropping to a whisper, audible only to the man standing in front of him. “We are currently surrounded by the police our hosts were so kind to fundraise for. The entire Gotham Police Department is here, and while I know that most of them are corrupt scum like you, I am also familiar with the ones who would be more than overjoyed to throw you into jail for illegal gambling, embezzlement of funds and propositioning. I can ruin you with nothing short of three sentences, and you can bet that should you not apologize to the young woman standing behind me, I will.”

The colour drained from Charles’s face, and he stuttered, trying to come up with a decent response. It was no secret that the Carnegies were a powerful family. But the Waynes were almost royalty, and everyone in Gotham would rather swallow their whole fist than get into their bad graces. Especially Bruce Wayne’s. Surely, a man who showed up to every social function with not only a new car but a gorgeous new woman on his arm, wasn’t afraid to pull a few strings to get what he wanted – even if that meant ruining someone’s life.

“I – I – Mr. Wayne, how dare you – “

“Apologize to the young lady, or I will personally make sure all your belongings are gone by the time this godforsaken party is over. You’ll be sleeping on the floor before you can threaten me or anyone else again.”

Charles stuttered a few more times, before gulping and nodding. Bruce released his arm, and the man was quick to hold his wrist, twisting it a few times. Who would’ve known the Wayne orphan had such a death grip?

He looked up and Bruce moved out of his way to partially reveal you, yet still close enough to protect you should Charles decide to hurt you further.

“I – I am…” he stumbled over his words, shaking his head. “My apologies, Miss. My behaviour was… It was unacceptable. I am sorry for my lack of attention, and for bumping into you. I hope you can accept my most sincere apologies.” The words sounded scared – not necessarily genuine but scared – and they almost made Bruce smirk.

“It’s alright,” you muttered, eyes still fixated on the floor. “Don’t worry about it.”

Bruce wrinkled his nose at how meek you sounded and looked around himself. The situation had turned rather awkward – people were staring in his direction and murmuring to themselves. So, he did the only thing plausible.

“Ladies and gentlemen, why are we standing here, when the caviar has just been served?” he exclaimed loudly, plastering on his most charming Bruce Wayne smile, which had the guests immediately react, answering with soft chuckles of their own. “Our lovely police force should be honoured the right way – but that doesn’t mean they should get all the good food for themselves!”

The crowd that had formed around you three quickly dissipated, and so did Bruce’s smile when he finally got a good look at you. You were down on your knees, picking up your tray and trying to pick up some of the appetisers to clean up your mess a bit.

“Hey,” he chided softly to get your attention. “Hey, please, look at me.”

When you didn’t, he kneeled down next to you.

That’s when he saw you. Truly saw you.

Your face was puffy, eyes red and wet with tears that you’d tried your best to wipe away. You looked nervous and miserable, and all Bruce wanted to do was bring you close and make you feel better.

“Sir, I – he was right,” you mumbled, shaking your head, trying your best to clean up the floor with nothing but your bare hands and the napkin you carried on your arm. “I bumped into him. You shouldn’t have gone through all that trouble.”

“I saw him,” Bruce replied softly. “He bumped into you. And even if he hadn’t, it did not mean he had the right to hit you. I was not going to let him do it.”

You nodded and sighed, wiping your tears with the sleeve of your arm.

“I caused you all that trouble. I’m really sorry. Shit, I feel terrible. I ruined that man’s suit and made such a mess… Nathan would mock me to hell and back if he saw me like this…” this caused the dam to break, and you wept loudly. Bruce did not really know what to do. What did one do whenever a woman was crying? He’d had a few one-night-stands in which the women cried once they realised he wanted nothing more to do with them, but they usually left by themselves, claiming he was a “heartless jerk”, and that was the rest of it.

He took the napkin from your hands and offered you a reassuring smile.

“If it makes you feel better that man deserved it. Charles Carnegie is a well-known corrupt and needed a reality check. If I could, I would’ve probably done that on purpose.”

This earned a soft chuckle from you, and you stood up, Bruce following right after.

“I’m going to call someone to take care of this.” You said, to which Bruce nodded.

“I’ll come with you.”

“There’s really no need for that, it’s okay – “

“Nonsense. That old jerk might try to follow you and threaten you again. I’m not letting you out of my sight.”

You nodded, and quickly made your way towards the kitchen, where you asked for someone’s help. They were quick to reply, and within a few minutes, the whole place was spotless, and no one could tell anything had happened if they looked at the floor.

As soon as it was done, you turned to Bruce and offered him a small smile.

“Thank you very much, Mr. Wayne. What you did back there was very kind. I don’t even know how I could ever repay you.”

Bruce lifted a hand and shook his head.

“There’s no need to repay me. I’m just happy I could help.”

You nodded sheepishly, and extended your hand, telling him your name.

“It’s very nice to meet you.”

Bruce shook it and his hold may have lingered on yours for a tad longer than what would have been acceptable, before tasting your name on his lips.

“It’s a lovely name. I’m Bruce. Wayne.”

“Yes – I gathered. Everyone knows you,” you chuckled.

“Sometimes I wish they didn’t.” He confided.

“I’m not sure that’s for the best. Being invisible has its downsides, I’m afraid.”

You gave him his number, and the two began to talk rather quickly, even going as far as deciding to gather for ice-cream about two weeks after your initial meeting. He texted you, saying he knew of a fantastic ice-cream parlour next to his company’s building, and invited you. You’d agreed almost instantly, replying with a bunch of emojis – and that’s how you found yourself next to Bruce Wayne, eating ice-cream. You’d gotten a lemon flavoured scoop, while Bruce went for mint.

“I was surprised you wanted to meet up!” You said, beaming up at him once you had paid for your sweet treat. Or rather, after Bruce had paid for it. He insisted, telling you he couldn’t possibly let a lady pay. You made him promise he’d let you pay next time, to which he replied, “We’ll see”.

“Really?” He replied. “Why is that?”

“Well, you’re Bruce Wayne. Don’t you have like, I don’t know, a bazillion cars to drive, and a bunch of models to date, and lots of money to spend? Why’d you invite me to ice-cream?”

“I’m spending my money on ice-cream,” he gave you a cheeky smirk.

“That’s not what I meant.” You chuckled and ate a spoonful of the treat in your hand.

“To be honest, my day was going terribly. I needed some fresh air, and you seemed like good company.” He was being as honest as he could. His day at Wayne Enterprises was going terribly, with a bunch of investors trying to go behind his back and steal some of his money. It had been a hassle, but thankfully all had been taken care of. He needed something to distract him from the stress.

“Oh, tell me about it,” you groaned, rolling your eyes. “The restaurant today was hellish. It was as if Satan had spawned a hundred different little devil women to make my day worse.” You told him about all the “Karens” that had bothered you, insisting you’d gotten their order wrong, when they were simply too drunk to function (even though it was around midday), complaining about how weird their food tasted, or even going as far as telling you they did not like the decoration. It made your blood boil, but a girl needed to pay her bills, so you sucked it up.

Bruce chuckled at your descriptions of the acts you’d like to perform to those women – none of them very family friendly – and found it rather cute when you decided to deal with your frustrations by scooping a large spoonful of your lemon flavoured ice-cream. You moaned in delight once the soft food melted on your tongue and smiled.

“Nathan would just freak out if he tried these,” you said, “He’s a sucker for good ice-cream.”

Bruce’s brow quirked quizzically. Nathan? The name sounded oddly familiar coming from your lips, but he couldn’t quite tell why. You seemed to notice his expression because you were quick to continue.

“My boyfriend. I’ve mentioned him before, remember? I think I mentioned at the party too.” You hummed and ate another spoonful of ice-cream, groaning once again. “This is good. Really good. Wow.”

“Ah. Yes, your boyfriend.” Bruce nodded. He couldn’t say he wasn’t disappointed. Sure, he’d only known you for two weeks, and you had told him about Nathan early on (he simply decided to ignore that) but he’d be lying if he said the thought of more than just a friendship hadn’t crossed his mind. It was only natural, and he considered himself to be an efficient man, who went for what he wanted – well, almost. Batman had made that a tad impossible, but Bruce was still figuring it out.

“Mhm!” You exclaimed excitedly. “Nathan and I have been dating for a few years. We’re actually close to four!” You quickly told him how you and Nathan had met, something you surprisingly had not done before. You’d been accompanying a friend of yours to the ER after someone had spilled a pan of burning hot oil on top of her. The Emergency Room Doctor, Nathan Smith, had taken care of her very quickly, but it was on you he had his eyes during the entire appointment. After the both of you had thanked him, and your friend had a bandaged arm, he’d stopped you in your tracks and politely asked if you would give him your number. You couldn’t lie to yourself – he was handsome, with dirty blonde hair and blue eyes, and a kind smile, and you swore he could’ve been a model if he wanted to. So, you had said yes.

“And the rest was history,” you finished. “We’ve been together ever since.”

Bruce hummed and busied himself with taking another spoonful of mint ice cream to his lips. “I see,” he hummed. “Well, I hope everything goes well with your relationship. He sounds nice.”

“He really is. I love him.” There were stars in your eyes, and while part of Bruce scowled, unhappy with this man he had never met before, another wanted to smile, because you did seem like a lovely girl, and he did want to see you happy.

After that day, you and Bruce became close friends.

He got to know you. You worked a job at a two Michelin star restaurant, waiting tables. That’s how you’d heard of the charity gala gig – word spread around that a rich couple was looking to hire some servers, and you’d applied in the hopes of making a few extra bucks.

He learned that you were a very resilient person, not at all like the way you’d appeared that day at the gala. You’d told him you were simply having a terrible day, with a few costumers yelling in your face during your regular shift. Charles Carnegie doing the same thing at night was the straw that broke the camel’s back and seemed to break you.

He got to know all your hobbies, and the things you liked to do for fun. Learned all your favourite books, the movies you liked to watch when you were down, the snacks you liked to munch on whenever your day went sour. He learned what made you tick, and the things that inspired you. You told him about your family – the relatives you loved, those you were close with, and the ones that simply did not deserve to be in your life anymore.

Every time you disclosed some piece of information about your life, Bruce drank it all up. He wanted to know you, all of you. He listened whenever you complained to him about work, whenever you texted him with any sort of happy news, or when you called him late at night because you felt lonely. It had been so long since Bruce had someone to call his friend, and he loved every bit of it. He knew he wasn’t the first person you came to whenever you wanted to talk. Part of him wished he was your first choice, but he saw the look in your eyes whenever you mentioned Nathan.

And speaking of, he even got to meet said Nathan.

A few weeks after your second meeting, the one where you’d gone out for ice-cream, Bruce decided to surprise you by having a meal at the restaurant you worked at. He asked for a table, and specifically asked for you as his server. The owner was clearly surprised; not only did he not expect Bruce Wayne of all people to have dinner at his restaurant, but he also wasn't expecting him to ask for a specific server. Especially one that seemed as insignificant as you. Bruce assured him it was vital that he had you as his server, and the man quickly relented, happy to tend to the billionaire’s every need.

“Hi, welcome to La Lune d'Argent. My name is – “ Before you could continue, you looked up and a grin spread across your face. “Bruce! What are you doing here?”

“Having dinner. What does it look like?” He replied with a smile.

“You could've told me you were coming! I’d have gotten you the best table.”

“This one is just fine, I promise. And letting you know in advance would sort of ruin the purpose of a surprise, don't you think?”

“You wanted to surprise me?” Heat rushed to your cheeks, and you shook your head, trying to get rid of it. Not only did you have a boyfriend, but you were also at your workplace and needed to remain professional. “Thank you. That’s very nice.”

Bruce smiled once again, before opening the menu in front of him and eyeing it.

“What do you recommend?” He asked.

“Well, the Seared Scallops with Truffle Risotto are our specialty. The Lobster Thermidor is also really good, and so are the Stuffed Shrimp with Crabmeat. But if you’re not in the mood for fish, then I recommend the Chateaubriand and the Filet Mignon. The Tournedos Rossini is a costumer favourite, but I’ve tried it and don’t think it’s all that.”

Bruce nodded, before going over the wine section.

“And the wine?”

“It depends. If you pick any of the fish dishes, then you should go with the Chardonnay or the Prosecco. If you go for the meat, then you should most likely enjoy a glass of Cabernet or Merlot. There’s plenty more, but I’m I wouldn’t be of any help with those. I’m terrible when it comes to wine.” You recited, the words spilling naturally from your lips – you’d done this a thousand times.

“That’s okay. Well then, how about I have the Foie Gras Terrine and the Truffle Risotto Croquettes as appetisers, and for the main dish, I’d like the Chateaubriand if possible. I’d also like a side of salad. As for the wine, I trust the owner’s good judgment. Cabernet it is.” He waited until you were done writing everything down and handed you the menu.

“Anything else?” You asked, taking it, and tucking it under your arm.

“Is your company too much to ask for?” He offered you a smile.

“Some of us have to actually work, Mr. Wayne,” you joked and stuck your tongue out playfully, “I’ll have your appetisers here in a minute.”

Dinner went well. The food was stellar (there was after all a reason the restaurant had two Michelin stars), the wine lived up to the expectations, and your company – or rather, the small moments you managed to spare him – warmed his heart. You offered him small quips about your work, told him about the usual costumers that sat on their usual tables and had their usual meals, gossiped about those you didn't like. It felt nice, to have a good time at work. You didn't completely hate your job, no, and some days were definitely fun thanks to your coworkers or any sort of shenanigans that happened during your shifts, but it could get boring and lonely and upsetting. Bruce being there was a nice change, and a welcome one.

“When does your shift end?” He asked, after he’d eaten a nice slice of cheesecake for dessert.

“In about half an hour, I believe. I have an early night today.”

“I’ll wait for you then.”

“Oh, you really don’t have to, Bruce – “

“Nonsense. Do you have a ride home?”

“I’ll just take the train.”

“I'll give you a ride then.”

“Bruce, that’s seriously not necessary – ��

You were interrupted by the voice of your boss, calling out your name in an accusatory tone. “Do I pay you to sit around and talk to costumers?”

You sighed and nodded towards Bruce.

“Thank you. A ride home would be nice.”

He waited until you were done, paid for his meal and left you a nice tip, and then waited outside. You took a few minutes, but soon enough you were walking towards him, wrapped around in a comfortable looking jacket.

“You ready to go?” you asked before a voice called out.

“Babe?”

You turned around, and your eyes widened before softening at the sight before them. “Nate!” You smiled, making your way to him, and hugging him tightly. Nate hugged you back just as tight, but his eyes did not leave the tall man that had been by your side.

“Who is this?” He asked, discontent clear in his voice.

“Oh!” You turned to face Bruce, arm linked with Nathan’s. “This is Bruce! I told you about him, remember? He’s my friend.”

“You did tell me about your friend. You did not mention your friend was the Bruce Wayne.”

“Well, that’s because he’s not the Bruce Wayne to me. He’s just Bruce.” You smiled, and Nathan didn't seem too pleased once Bruce extended his hand.

“Bruce Wayne.” He spoke. Nathan shook his hand, steel-like eyes taking the taller man in, his expensive clothes and pulled-together appearance.

“Nathan Smith. So, you’re my girl’s friend, is that right?” He asked, pulling you closer by the waist. It wasn't hard to miss the jealous look in his face, and Bruce decided to ease the guy’s mind a bit, not wanting to get into any trouble. And not wanting to get you into any trouble.

“Yes, that’s right. I’ve heard a lot about you, it’s nice to finally meet you.”

“Yeah? That’s funny because she’s barely said a word about you.” Nathan replied, offering Bruce a tight-lipped smile, and turning to you. “I came here to surprise you. Heard you were getting an early night, wanted to give you a lift home. Maybe we can make up for lost time? I miss you.” It did not take an idiot to see what the hell he was getting at, and it made your duck your head slightly, clearly embarrassed.

“That’s very kind of you, thank you. I loved the surprise.” You faced Bruce once again and offered him an apologetic smile. “Nate will take me home, if that’s fine by you.”

“Fine by him? What's this got to do with him?” Your boyfriend asked, chuckling dryly, and giving you a not so amused look.

“Bruce had offered to take me home. It was kind of him, so I said yes.”

“Yes, yes, very kind.” Nathan turned to Bruce too. “As you can see, your help is no longer needed. I’ll be taking my girlfriend home now.” He said the words with a sneer, happy to claim you as his.

“Yes, well. Thank you for taking care of her.”

“Oh, I do.”

You looked awkwardly in between both men and cleared your throat moving away from your boyfriend to envelop Bruce in a hug.

“Thank you for the surprise. It was really nice. And thanks for the offer too. The ride back home one. I’ll see you some other day?”

“Absolutely,” He replied and turned to leave.

As he walked away, he could hear Nathan’s voice and how accusatory it sounded.

“Surprise? What was that all about? Why was that guy visiting you at work?”

“He’s a friend, Nate. He just wanted to stop by.”

“Oh yeah? And what business does he have just stopping by? He’s not your boyfriend. I am.”

“He’s just a friend, Nate. I promise. Let's just go home, please? I miss you.”

Bruce was inside his car before he could properly make out whatever Nathan had replied to you, but he could tell it was nothing good.

The next time Bruce saw you, you were sitting by yourself at a coffee shop, having an iced drink and reading a book. He thought about approaching you but decided against it. You looked peaceful, and he didn't want to upset you should you not want to see him after the whole ordeal with your boyfriend went down.

But he was pleasantly surprised when he heard your voice call his name, and your hand beckoning him to come closer.

“Hey! I had no idea you came to this place. Wanna sit next to me?” You asked, moving your bag out of the chair in front of you, making space for him,

“Sometimes, on my lunch break. I take it today is your day off?”

“Mhm! Got today all to myself. I was supposed to spend it with Nathan, but we kind of fought so I decided to get some fresh air myself. You know, just to clear my head.” You said the words “kind of fought” as if they meant nothing, as if fighting with your boyfriend was a daily occurrence. He didn't like that.

“I’m sorry. Is there anything I can do to help?” Bruce sat down in front of you, placing his own coffee on the table.

“Nah, not really. That’s just who Nate is. He gets upset sometimes, and I have to put some space in between us. No big deal. What about you? What are you up to?”

“Well, like I mentioned, this was supposed to be my lunch break, but I took the afternoon off. Alfred – my butler – is supposed to come pick me up later. It’s the anniversary of my parents’ marriage. I want to visit their graves.”

Your eyes softened and you placed a hand on top of his. Your palm felt warm on top of his, and Bruce immediately turned his hand so he could slot his fingers in between yours.

“I’m sorry.” Was all you said. After all, what more could you? Everyone knew Bruce Wayne’s story, but you did not want to seem presumptuous and assume you knew all about him. “I’m sure they’ll appreciate it.”

“Me too,” Bruce replied quietly, his voice thick with emotion, the way it usually was whenever he mentioned his parents. He didn't speak about them to many people, but let his facade slip completely for those he did trust enough.

“Is it okay if I come with?” You asked, and immediately regretted it. Why would you ask such a thing? Why would he even allow you to attend such a private thing with him? It was dumb, really. Before you could take your words back though, he replied, eyebrow quirked.

“Really?”

You shrugged sheepishly.

“Sure. It sounds tough, and I don’t want you to suffer all by yourself. You tend to do that.”

It was true. Bruce often hid his feelings, his emotions, shielding them from everyone. It hadn’t been that long since you two had started talking – maybe one or two months – but you could already tell he was very selective with the people he trusted. And how could he not be? You wanted to be someone he could trust, though. Wanted to be someone he could rely on, help him shoulder all his burdens.

Bruce thought it over for a bit. It would be nice to have some company. Visiting his parents’ grave was a very personal and intimate thing, yes, but he considered you a friend, and he’d be lying if he said he didn't want your company. He was sure both his father and his mother would've liked you, would've enjoyed your sense of humour and appreciated his kindness. So why not?

“I would appreciate that,” he said, and you smiled. “Won't it be a problem with Nathan?”

“Don't worry about him. He’s not the boss of me, and I'm not doing anything wrong.”

That’s how you found yourself, standing in front of the graves of Thomas and Martha Wayne, the beautiful Wayne Manor just ahead.

“I’m sure they loved each other very much,” you said, eyes not leaving the carved stones in front of you.

“They did.” Bruce agreed with a nod. “My father would bring my mother flowers nearly every day. She used to joke about having her own private flower shop thanks to him. He never stopped though. He’d bring her different flowers according to her mood. That’s just how he was. Always looking out for her. He could tell whenever she was sad, or happy, or worried.”

“What an amazing husband,” you smiled, picturing the late Thomas Wayne reading his wife and choosing flowers accordingly.

“And my mother was just as amazing as him. She could tell when he had had a bad day at the hospital. I never could – she used to tell me she could sense it in the first few steps he took whenever he arrived home. Whenever he felt down, she’d help Alfred make his favourite meal. He didn't have to ask, she simply did it out of the goodness of her heart, and all her love for him.”

“It must've been incredible to be surrounded by such love. You were very lucky, Bruce. And I'm sure your parents loved you just as much as they loved each other, if not even more.”

You smiled up at him and he offered you a small smile in return. You were right. He had been lucky to have experienced such love and affection at a young age. It made him realise the kind of relationship he wanted to be with and taught him the kind of partner he should be.

He was just about to speak when your phone started chiming.

“Sorry – forgot to mute it,” you mumbled, turning the sound off. It didn't do anything to quiet it down though, since it just kept vibrating in your pocket. You huffed and turned it on, brows furrowing in confusion, and then relaxing.

“It’s Nate,” you said, not looking up from the screen, “He’s apologising for our fight. Says he was in a very bad emotional state. Poor thing… He’s very self-conscious, you know. Keeps telling me he’s too lucky to have me, that I could have anyone in the world, but I settled for him. He always thinks he’s not good enough for me, that I'll leave him for someone else” You chuckled dryly, before continuing, “He couldn't be farther from the truth, though. I’m the lucky one.” You looked up and Bruce and pointed to the phone in your hand. “I should probably go. Nate wants to apologise in person, and I should probably talk to him.”

Bruce nodded and pointed to the limo standing near the street.

“Alfred will take you home.”

“Thanks.” You smiled up and him and moved forward to hug him. Bruce softened immediately. You slotted perfectly against him, and he felt like a piece of a puzzle that had just found its matching half. Unfortunately, you pulled away, taking all the warmth with you.

“I’ll see you some other time,” you said, walking away.

Once you were out of his view, he turned to his parents.

Perhaps someday he’d be able to love you like they loved each other.

Bruce was working when he received a text from you. It had been a few days since you’d visited his parents’ grave with him, and you hadn't spoken face-to-face since. You’d been texting non-stop though, telling each other about your day, sending pictures of your respective meals, or just sharing funny anecdotes or pictures you saw online that reminded you of each other. Bruce clicked on the notification with your name.

Look at this!

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Clicking on the picture, he could see your radiant face, partially hidden by a huge bouquet of roses. They did nothing to steal the shine from you though, and Bruce cringed at how they paled in comparison to your beauty. He was quick to shoot back a reply,

They look pretty. Secret admirer?

You were even quicker to reply.

They’re from Nate, as an apology! Isn't he the sweetest? He’s been spoiling me rotten. I don't think I deserve it.

Bruce’s stomach twisted at the mention of your boyfriend. His fingers flew across the screen as he typed.

You deserve that, and much more.

You replied with a smiley face, and that was the end of your conversation for the day.

It was hard to get back to work after that, his thoughts plagued with you. Your nice smile, your kind words, the way you fit perfectly against the shape of his body and how tightly you’d hugged him back on the Manor grounds. He knew it was wrong to want you - you were dating someone else, and it’s not like you knew each other for a long time, but he couldn't help it.

Bruce took a deep breath, and gulped down an entire glass of water, before chastising himself and focusing on whatever task he had left to complete.

It didn't work, and Lucius found him staring at the screen of his phone for a good five minutes, before deciding his boss probably deserved a break from his somewhat incessant teasing.

After that, you met up with Bruce a few more times.

You’d meet up sometimes for lunch or a late afternoon snack, and you’d even had breakfast together once. You chalk it up to friendly outings, and so does Bruce (although he’s sadder than you to admit that). Unfortunately, these meetings were not filled with chatter about your lives, motivations, and dreams for the future. Instead, you worried your pretty little head off thinking about Nathan, who didn’t text you for hours, seemingly pushing away from you, only to give you mixed signals the next day and apologising for his behaviour. Bruce could see how draining it was, could see how you always glanced at your phone whenever the two of you were together, and how you seemed to walk on eggshells whenever Nathan called you.

Things would get harder for the two of you at night – Bruce was out patrolling the city as Batman, something he had not and would never tell you – and you sometimes you got lonely. Bruce simply told you he was busy, and you in good faith, believed him. After all, he was a busy man, running a busy company, leading a busy life. You were lucky enough he managed to spend some time with you during the week.

Bruce had become your closest friend. You loved hanging out with him. It was like he got you. He was a great listener, always providing you with great insight whenever you asked for it, or simply being a shoulder to cry on if you wanted to. He would give you solid advice, support you on (nearly) every decision and all of your hobbies, encouraging you to seek out new experiences and the things you’ve always wanted to do but were never brave enough to.

One day, the two of you were meeting up for coffee. You had your legs tucked under yourself, grabbing a warm mug with both of your hands. You loved this café; loved the ambient, the fluffy pillows and couches, the vast choice of drinks. It was your own special little corner, and you were happy to bring Bruce along.

You two were in a middle of a conversation about your favourite books, before your phone buzzed. You decided to ignore it, but it just buzzed again. And again. And again. A bunch of texts messages started coming through, and as you picked up your phone, it started ringing.

“It’s Nate,” you mumbled, accepting the call, and mouthing a small “sorry” to Bruce, who nodded.

“Hey honey,” you said. Bruce could make out your boyfriend’s voice from the other side of the line, and he could tell he wasn’t pleased.

“Where the hell are you!?” he heard Nathan say, and you involuntarily flinched in your seat, frowning.

“I’m at a café. I told you this, didn’t I?” you asked.

“Yeah, well, Ricky just texted me saying he saw you sitting with some other guy. What the fuck is going on?”

“Another guy?” you mumbled, “Nate, I’m with Bruce. We’re out for coffee, that’s all.”

Bruce heard Nathan scoff, and his fists curled on his lap. He was just glad you couldn’t see it.

“Ah, of course. Fucking Bruce. It’s always him, isn’t it?”

This seemed to get you riled up.

“I asked you if you wanted to come with me, and you told me no. You said you had better things to do and hated this place,” you shook your head, brows furrowing in anger. “So, I invited a friend. I’m allowed to have other friends, you know.”

“Yeah, sure. And it had to be a guy? You had to invite a guy out for coffee? Just the two of you?”

You curled into yourself and away from Bruce, lowering your voice.

“Nate, if you cancel on me, I’m going to invite other people. It’s just Bruce.”

“That guy’s trying to get into your fucking pants, and you know it, and you keep encouraging him. How does that make me feel, huh? Knowing you’re out there with some other douche who wants to jump your bones?” Bruce wanted nothing more than to seek out the asshole you were dating and beating him to a pulp. How he even dared to speak to you like that was beyond him, but he decided to say nothing. At least not yet.

“Nate, I don’t like it when you talk to me like this. He’s just a friend, I told you, you have no reason to be jealous – “

“Yeah sure. Don’t bother coming home.”

And he hung up.

Bruce eyed you, the way your pretty eyes welled up with tears and how you quickly wiped them away, throwing your phone and belongings to the purse sitting next to you.

“I – I’m sorry, Bruce, I – I need to go. I have to sort this out with him.” You mumbled, standing up. Bruce, however, was quicker, and stood in front of you, blocking your path.

He furrowed his brows and spoke in a low voice as not to startle you.

“He shouldn’t talk to you like this.”

“He’s right. I know he is – I know he’s got low-self-esteem issues, he’s just worried is all. He’s afraid to lose me, I know he is.” You said these words like a mantra, and Bruce wondered just how long you’d been repeating them to yourself. It made his heart ache. He reached out to wipe your tears, but you took a step back, shaking your head.

“I’m sorry for cutting our meeting short, Bruce,” you mumbled. “I’ll see you later.”

And you were out of his sight.

“Hang out?” Bruce asked, balancing his phone between his ear and his shoulder as he shaved.

“Yeah!” he could hear your excited voice on the other side, and it made him smile. “It’ll be just me and Nate and some more friends. I know how you are with strangers, so you don’t have to come if you don’t want to, but I thought it’d be nice if you were out of your house for once. You spend all those nights working, you’ve gotta learn to have fun!”

It was partially true. He did spend all these nights working. Just not a very conventional job. In fact, he’d been spending the last few weeks looking into Nathan Smith. His past, his present, and making assumptions on his future. He had all eyes on this douche.

“Bruce? Are you there?” you called, “Look, I’m sorry. I know you’re not a fan of other people – “

“I’ll be there.” He said curtly, blade gliding against his smooth skin. “Just text me the details and I’ll meet you there.”

“Really?” you let out a squeal of excitement and Bruce nearly cut himself with the sound. He realised then just how much he wanted you to be like that all the time. Happy. Excited.

“Really.”

“Okay – okay! I’ll let you know where and when! I can’t wait to see you again! I have to go now though, my shift’s about to start. See you soon, yes?” You hung up and Bruce chuckled to himself. He couldn’t wait to see you either. He wasn’t, although, very eager to see Nathan. But for your sake, he’d be on his best behaviour.

You met a few days after the phone call, at a local bar.

It was bustling with people and energy. Loud music was being played on speakers, the whole place smelled of cheap beer, and the people’s noise was deafening. Still, he overlooked all of that just for the sheer pleasure of hanging out with you.

“Bruce!” You called out, getting up from your spot near the counter and hurrying to meet him halfway. You hugged him tightly and he once again felt like you were meant to be in his arms forever. When you pulled away, he smiled. “You made it!” You were wearing an off-the-shoulder top and a pair of shorts decorated with small lace at the bottom. But Bruce couldn’t care less about what you were wearing – you always looked radiant.

“Of course I did.”

“Here, come meet my friends!”

You dragged him to a small group of people and introduced him to everyone. He was expecting more and was glad to find it was only you plus 4 others. Nathan was still on his way, you told him.

All of you kept light conversation for a while. Bruce did not really try to keep up with your friends’ conversations. One of them kept rubbing herself all up against him, giggling and obviously trying to get herself into his good graces. She was clearly only interested in his money, and Bruce had to excuse himself a few times just to get away.

After a few minutes, your head turned and you smiled, standing up to greet someone.

Nate.

“Hey honey!” You smiled, lifting your head to kiss him on the lips. Nathan quickly scanned the table, and once his eyes fell on Bruce, he scowled, one hand coming down to grip your waist, and the other to give you a light squeeze on your ass cheek (which made Bruce cringe and want to punch this jerk to next Sunday).

“Hello. Didn’t know we’d be having so much company,” the doctor sneered, eyes lingering on the Wayne billionaire.

“Well, if you don’t like me meeting up with friends on my own, I thought we could all meet up. Isn’t it a nice solution?” you smiled, but Nate didn’t seem to care about it. How dare he, Bruce thought. If you were his, he would never overlook your smile. Never. But she’s not yours, a tiny voice whispered inside his head.

Nate then turned to you, eyeing you up and down. His eyes lingered on your exposed collarbone and shoulders, and on the shorts that adorned your pretty legs. He sneered.

“And what the fuck is this?” he asked with a scoff.

“Hm?”

“What the fuck are you wearing?”

“Oh! These are new!” you spun in your place, showing off your outfit. “Do you like them? I thought the lace details were super cute – “

“So you’re wearing this out?” Nate crossed his arms, visibly upset. “Seriously? Don’t you think it’s a bit too revealing?”

It wasn’t, really. The top, even if it was off-the-shoulder, did not expose your cleavage too shockingly. The shorts weren’t too short either, covering just the right amount of skin. And even if the clothes were too short (which they weren’t), Bruce thought Nathan should just mind his fucking business.

“You think so?” your smile was quickly replaced by a pout, and you looked down at your clothes self-consciously.

“Yes, I fucking think so. I don’t understand why you feel the need to dress like that, show that much skin. People might get the wrong idea.”

“What wrong idea? Nate, they’re just clothes. There’s nothing wrong with them.”

The atmosphere had become tense. Your friends were all giving each other knowing looks but kept to themselves. Bruce didn’t have the heart to simply stand there and watch though. He put an arm in between you and Nathan and spoke calmly.

“Look, I think she should be allowed to wear whatever she wants. It’s not like she’s naked – “

“Stay the hell out of this, rich guy. I couldn’t care less what you think, this is not your relationship, and she is my girlfriend.”

Bruce looked at you, but you seemed to be avoiding his gaze, eyes fixated on Nathan.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t think they were that revealing when I tried them on. I just liked how they looked on me.”

“Yeah, well, I’m fucking embarrassed to be seen with you when you dress like that. Dressed like a common whore.”

That was enough for Bruce. He stepped forward, ready to send his fist flying across this jerk’s face, but your smaller hand wrapped itself around his arm.

“Bruce, please,” you pleaded, looking up at him with wide eyes. “It’s okay. He’s right. I am showing too much skin. I should dress more modestly.”

“He’s being a jerk,” Bruce muttered, eyes urging you to let him go. “I’m not letting him speak to you like that.”

“Please.” You sounded so meek, so small. It tugged at Bruce’s heartstrings, and he immediately lowered his arm. He’d do anything for you, really.

“Fine.”

“Yeah, that’s better.” Nathan scoffed, before grabbing you by the arm and pulling you close. “Come on. Let’s get out of here.”

Without sparing him a second glance, you were out of the bar.

“I’m telling you, Alfred, that guy is the worst. I don’t understand how she’s still with him, he treats her like shit,” Bruce muttered to himself as he paced back and forth in his bedroom.

“Master Wayne, although I admire your compassion, I cannot help but wonder if you are sticking your nose in someone else’s business.” Alfred replied. He’d been watching Bruce walk holes into the floor, and although he wanted to help, the older man knew there was really nothing he could do.

“I know. I know I am but – she deserves better. She does, she deserves someone who’ll treat her right, who won’t talk to her that way, who will respect her and adore her – “

“Someone like you, I presume.”

“Yes. Exactly.”

Bruce sighed and sat on his bed, defeated.

“Master Wayne, have you considered telling this girl the feelings you’re harbouring for her?” Alfred asked, moving closer to the bed.

“I can’t. She loves him Alfred, she… she loves him.” He muttered again.

The butler gave Bruce a sympathetic smile, before walking away.

You loved Nathan. You didn’t love him.

So why did it all feel so terribly wrong?

You walked inside Wayne Manor for the first time a few weeks later.

It was raining – pouring, even – and you’d desperately knocked on its big doors. Alfred opened them for you, and recognised you instantly, having stolen glances at Bruce’s phone whenever he looked at pictures of you.

“Hi – Hi, I’m sorry for the intrusion,” you quickly introduced yourself, tears running down your face. “Is – is Bruce here?”

Alfred gently guided you to the living room, where he told you to wait. You stood there awkwardly, picking at your fingers, and looking around, taking in the beauty of Bruce’s family home.

When Alfred returned, he brought with him a few towels, and Bruce Wayne himself. The latter was just about to leave for patrol, but upon hearing from Alfred that you were standing on his doorway, drenched from head to toe and crying, he decided to ditch his nightly duties.

“Hey,” he said, hurrying towards you. It was all it took – you collapsed in his arms, tears running down your face. Bruce held you tightly and you cried, burrowing your face in his chest. Alfred simply placed the towels on top of one of the couches, and took his leave, silently going upstairs to get a robe for you. “Hey, it’s okay. I’ve got you.”

Once you managed to stop crying, you looked up at him and sniffled, shaking your head.

“I’m so sorry – you’re all wet because of me now,” you told him.

Bruce shook his head and moved to hand you a towel.

“It’s okay. Just tell me what’s wrong.”

You sighed and used the towel to dry your hair, wrapping the other one around your shoulders.

“It… it was Nathan.”

Bruce looked at you, eyes narrowing.

“What did he do?”

“Nothing! I mean – we just fought, that’s all. But it was a really nasty fight.” You said and burst into tears again. “He – he kept saying all I did was walk around and cheat on him! He said I didn’t truly love him, that I was selfish and only thought of myself. It – it’s not true! I love him Bruce, I really do!” You buried your face on your hands, and Bruce moved to sit by your side.

Bruce held you tightly in his arms, hand stroking your back and your head. You melted in his hold, breath evening out and tears eventually subsiding.

"I just... I don't know what to do, Bruce..." You mumbled against his chest. "I really do love him, but he said all of those mean things..."

Bruce's lips pressed into a thin line as he navigated the best way to go about this conversation.

"Nathan..." He mumbled, hands running through your hair. "Does he speak to you like this a lot?"

You sniffled, stilling in his arms.

"We fight... Lately we've been fighting a lot, but... I know he loves me... He doesn't mean it. He's been under so much stress, things at the hospital are getting chaotic and I've been stressing him out..."

Bruce shook his head, his hold unconsciously tightening around you. So he took his stress out on you? Jerk.

"That's not okay. He can't speak to you like this, he doesn't have the right to." Bruce pulled away to look you in the eyes and you sniffled as his big hands wiped your tears.

"He doesn't mean any harm, you know... He's under a lot of pressure from his superiors..."

He sighed once again, and then watched from the corner of his eyes as Alfred carried in his hand a tray of warm drinks and a fluffy robe.

"Look," he said, tilting your chin to meet his gaze. "How about you change into something more comfortable, and we'll talk about it over a drink?"

You smiled and nodded, getting up and thanking Alfred, grabbing the robe so you could go change.

Once you came back, you told Bruce you did not want to talk about such sad topics any further, and simply wanted to distract yourself. Bruce was happy to oblige.

You settled in the couch side by side with a blanket covering your laps. He let you pick a movie, and you sat side by side, poking fun at whatever it was that was playing on the TV, sipping on warm beverages, and talking.

“So you’re telling me you don’t know how to make a cup of tea?” You asked, leaning back to look at Bruce with a serious expression.

“Look, I was a failure and I decided it was better not to learn instead of having Alfred annoy me about it. He’s very serious about his tea. You should hear him yell at me.”

You chuckled and involuntarily placed your legs over Bruce’s lap under the blankets. He was quick to lay his hands on top of them, drawing patterns absentmindedly.

“You’re impossible,” you chuckled.

“Oh, so you’re all high and mighty and capable of cooking anything and everything?” He raised an eyebrow.

“Even if I wasn't very good, I'm sure I'd be able to cook more than you. I had to, you know. Living on my own and all,” you shrugged, “Some people don’t have butlers doing everything for them.”

Bruce hummed. You were right. It was one of the things he admired the most about you. How unafraid you were to tell him exactly what you think, and how resilient you were, how strong-willed and stubborn. Bruce was sure he’d never met a woman as strong as you in his entire life.

“Alright, pay up.” You extended your hand.

Now you were sitting a few inches apart, a Monopoly board on the couch in front of you.

“You’re cheating,” he huffed, counting his bills.

“No, you’re simply not very good. Aren't you like, supposed to be a god at this or something? This is your whole life.” You popped a popcorn inside your mouth and smiled.

“Usually, lives aren't dictated by the throw of a dice,” he said, handing you two bills. “You're ruining me here. I’m gonna go bankrupt.”

“Then learn how to play better.” You shrugged and rolled your dice again, moving your piece accordingly. Bruce smiled. He could get used to this, spending time with you, cuddled up in his couch. That's where you were meant to be, next to him, in his arms, in his blankets. You were meant to be in his home, brightening up the place with something as small as a smile, in his life, brightening his whole existence with just a tilt of your head. It was at this moment that Bruce realised that his feelings for you ran way deeper than just a simple friendship. After all, friends didn't wish to spend eternity together. Friends didn't want to lick the popcorn salt off each other’s lips, friends didn't want to hold each other close and whisper sweet nothings in their ear.

As the night went on, so did the activities. When you were done with board games, you switched to card games (getting your ass kicked by Bruce, who was far too good at Poker for your own liking). You changed movies about three times, simply not satisfied with the choices you’d picked earlier – not that Bruce minded. You’d made a game out of changing movies every time the characters gave you second hand embarrassment and had plenty of fun yelling at the protagonists who slipped and stuttered and acted like bozos.

“Oh, come on,” you cringed, body twitching involuntarily. “Why is she singing Fight Song on top of a table? Do directors think this is how people behave?”

“You stood on top of my couch and yelled. I think that’s close to what’s happening on the TV,” The man next to you eyed you with amusement as you scoffed and pointed an accusatory finger at him.

“That’s different, I won Monopoly,” you said nonchalantly, “Everyone knows you’re entitled to do whatever you want once you win Monopoly.” You grabbed a pillow and threw it in his direction, but you should've known better, because Bruce simply picked it mid-air and raised it in front of his head, to hit you back. However, at the sudden movement, your eyes widened, and you quickly flinched away from him, panic spreading all over your face.

Bruce let go of the pillow, heart breaking at the sight before him. What the fuck had just happened? Did you flinch away from him?

“I – “ You seemed to notice his worry and were quick to shake your head, laughing weakly. “I’m sorry.”

“Are you okay?” He asked, torn between reaching out and staying in place. He didn't want to scare you even more than he already had.

“Yes! Yes, I am. I’m sorry, I wasn't expecting you to do that. Was just trying to get away from the pillow.”

“You scrambled away from me.”

“Well, yes, you were going to hit me with a pillow, weren't you, Bruce?”

“I would never hurt you. You know that,” he whispered, and you looked away, still trying to pretend everything was fine.

“Well, I didn't want a pillow on my face. Alright? It’s nothing, I promise.”

He wasn't convinced in the least, and Bruce knew what it usually meant. His mind went back to Nathan, to the way he had treated you at the bar, to his behaviour towards you whenever you and Bruce were out for ice-cream or coffee. The gears were turning in his head, and you took notice of that, moving forward and holding his hands.

“Hey,” you smiled, although it didn't reach your eyes, “It’s fine. I promise. Everything is okay.”

He didn't believe it. Didn't buy it. But he had to earn your trust if he wanted to do something about it, and scaring you away wasn't an option.

He attempted to smile back, and nodded, muttering a small “Alright.”

You settled back next to him, and he could feel the way your body had tensed up as soon as your arms had brushed together. He needed to calm you down. So, he spoke.

About his life, about his childhood. He told you about all the times his father would let him tag along whenever he went to work at the hospital, how fascinated he was with his occupation. Saving lives. How great was that. He told you how much his father’s work had inspired him. He explained to you the intricate games he’d play in his gardens, pretending to be a detective who was investigating every sort of crimes. He wanted to save lives, just like his father did.

“You do, you know,” you mumbled, looking up from under his chin to get a good look at his beautiful face. “Even if you’re not a doctor, you still save lives. You make people’s lives better. All your philanthropy and charity are helping Gotham. You’re not doing this in vain.”

He smiled. If only you knew how much his charity and philanthropy extended.

You replied with stories of your own. The things you liked to do while growing up, the games you’d make up in your room, thinking of faraway lands with castles and elves and fantasies. You’d be a police officer one day, and a pirate the next. You told him about your childhood home, your high school, your college major. You showed him pictures of your roommates and the fun activities you did together.

It was an exchange. You’d tell him about yourself, and he would open up to you in return. The TV was still on, and both of you were looking at it, but none was paying attention. Your conversation was much more important.

Bruce told you about his childhood, how lonely he would feel sometimes. He told you sometimes he would isolate himself, the grief of having lost his parents far too much to bear. It made your heart ache and you found yourself leaning closer, wishing to take all of his pain away.

"You don't have to suffer all on your own now, though," you said, looking up to meet his chocolate brown eyes. "I'm here now. You can count on me to help you with whatever. You can trust me, Bruce." Your hand was suddenly on his cheek, palm hot and caring, and Bruce instantly leaned into it, sure that this was where he was meant to be – in your arms, staring into your eyes, baring his soul open. The air crackled in between you – it was as if the world had shifted and finally landed in place. It felt right. Everything felt right, and your eyes briefly drifted towards his lips.

He was just about to say something when a few loud knocks could be heard on the door. Your head whipped around in panic, the sound clearly startling you (something Bruce kept in mind).

"Alfred, could you please get that?" He asked, arm wrapping itself around you in an unconsciously protective move. You relaxed in his hold just as quickly as you’d stiffened, and his heart leaped. Did you feel safe with him?

The door slid open, revealing behind it a massive bouquet of red roses. The roses moved and Bruce quickly spotted the figure who was holding them.

"Nate?" You whispered, untangling yourself from Bruce's hold and taking tentative steps towards the door. Shit.

"Babe – hey," Nathan replied, sighing with relief once he spotted you. "I'm so sorry, I – I'm such an idiot. I'm the worst."

You eyed him sceptically, something like doubt shining in your eyes.

"I shouldn't have said any of those things. The hospital has been so busy, my bosses have been giving me shit every day, and I took it out on you. I'm so sorry, will you please forgive me?"

You hugged your arms, shielding yourself. You looked back at Bruce, who was watching the situation, lips a thin line and eyes cloudy.

"I didn't like the way you spoke to me... You really hurt, Nate, did you mean all of those things?"

"No! No – fuck no, I didn't. I was an idiot. I am an idiot. Please, let me make it up to you. I don't deserve you, but if you forgive me, I'll spend the rest of my days trying to prove to you I am worthy of your love. I'm so sorry. I'll be better. I promise. Babe, you make me better."

Bruce wasn't fazed by this speech. He didn't buy a single word of what Nathan had just told you, and once again, he would not keep it to himself. This man was manipulating you, preying on your emotions and your love for him, probably even going as far as laying his hands on you, and you deserved better.

"Perhaps you should've thought of those things before you treated her like shit." He said coldly, standing up and walking towards you. You turned away from him, which had Bruce's heart clench. Why were you turning from him?

But he didn't need to give it much more thought – you were already falling for Nathan's narrative.

"You – " Nathan's grip tightened. Bruce saw the way it tightened and saw your eyes land on his fist as well. This caused him to loosen it, and give a small, dry chuckle. "Bruce. Thank you so much for taking care of her. Truly. I'm so thankful you took care of my girl when she wasn't feeling well."

You raised an eyebrow. "Really?"

"Yes, babe, really. He's your friend, and I'm willing to get along with your friends. I'd do anything for you, you know it. Don't you?" He stuck out his hands, presenting to you the bouquet of roses in one hand, and a box of chocolates in the other. It was only now that Bruce (and apparently, you as well) realised that both items, as well as the person who was carrying them, were dripping wet.

"You came all the way out here in the rain to apologise?" You asked, stepping out towards the man standing outside the door.

"Yes. Of course. I would do this and more for you, baby. You know that, don't you? I'll do anything for you. You drive me nuts, that's it. That's all! It's only because I love you so much that I act like this. Please give me another chance. I won't waste it. I know you deserve better than me, you could literally get any guy out there, but fuck... Please, just let me prove to you that you make me a better man." He looked desperate, panicked, blue eyes widening with fear.

It was useless. You were completely entranced by the manipulative bullshit this guy was spewing.

“Do you promise not to yell at me again?” You asked, taking another step towards him, fingers softly touching the rose petals.

“Yes. I do. I’ll never do it again – I promise babe. I’ll be better. I am better whenever I am with you. I know I overreacted, but it’s only because I love you. You make me crazy – I am crazy, for you.”

You looked up at him, something unsure in your eyes. You glanced back at Bruce, who furrowed his eyebrows and softly shook his head “no”. It wasn't a command or an order, simply some advice. This jerk didn't deserve you. You turned back to look at Nathan and took the roses he was holding from him.

“These are really pretty,” you mumbled, inhaling their scent.

“Not as pretty as you. So, what do you say? Will you forgive me? Please? Just give me another chance.”

You seemed to ponder it, quietly analysing the roses before you. Then, a bigger smile spread across your face, and you nodded, moving towards Nathan to wrap your arms around his neck. He sighed in relief and hugged you back, burrowing his face in your hair. When his gaze caught Bruce’s, his eyes hardened. If looks could kill, Bruce would be dead and gone. Perhaps it’s a good thing he wasn't scared of this jerk.

You let go of your boyfriend and turned to Bruce, holding the bouquet tightly in your hands.

“Thank you for your kindness, Bruce.”

“Are you sure about this – “

“But this is my relationship. We’re friends, aren’t we? I need you to trust me here, okay? It’s fine. Nathan’s apologised. Everything is okay now,” you smiled, and Bruce swore he could see something breaking behind your eyes.

“He doesn’t deserve you, he yelled and – “

“Look, I said I was sorry, alright, rich boy?” Nate interrupted, spitting the words. “Mind your own business. This is my relationship, alright? I appreciate that you were here for my girl, but your help is no longer needed.”

Then, he turned, taking you away with him.

The last thing Bruce saw before Nathan’s car was out of you, was you leaning over the console to press a sweet kiss on his cheek.

He didn't like this one bit. And he was not going to rest until he was sure you were away from this guy.

He didn't see you for a while after that.

At least not directly.

During his patrols, he would stop by your apartment and watch for any signs of either you or him. But either you were extremely shy, or Nathan was very careful about not letting anyone peek into their lives, and usually closed the blinds. Bruce was sure it was the latter. He could no longer peek inside – Lucius had destroyed the system that had allowed him to spy on every citizen in Gotham, after all – and was stuck texting you and trying to pry information from you.

The only thing you told him was that everything was fine. Nathan was a gentleman, taking you out for dinner and showering you in gifts, telling you he loved you. According to you, things couldn't be better.

Your texting patterns would be sporadic. Some days, he’d spend all day chatting with you, sending pictures and things that had reminded him of you, making plans to meet up and grab a bite. Others, you’d ignore him all day, giving him one-worded replies once or twice.

“Alfred, I just don’t know what to do,” he confessed once. “I’m pretty sure the bastard might be hitting her or something. The way she acts, the way he acts? Yelling at her, fighting, and then showering her with gifts and affection? It doesn't sit right with me.”

“Have you thought about reporting it to the police, sir?”

“I don’t have enough evidence,” he grumbled. “She flinched once, and they fight. That doesn't necessarily mean he’s abusive towards her. Besides, what if anyone investigates it, does not notice anything wrong, and he gets angrier? What if he takes it out on her?” Bruce placed his hands on his face and laid his arms on his knees. It was a tricky situation. If he wasn't abusive but was still a scumbag, he doubted you’d ever leave him. If he did hurt you in any physical way, he might be risking your own safety in case he reported anything.

Suddenly, his phone chimed, and he was pulled from his thoughts as your ringtone played. He picked up on the first ring.

“Hello?”

You were breathing heavily but did not say anything. Bruce was starting to worry.

“Hello? Is everything okay?”

“Yes – yes, it is,” you quickly said, and your voice held a foreign emotion to it, something Bruce couldn't quite place. “I’m sorry, I know it’s short notice, but do you want to grab something to eat? I was supposed to meet a friend, but she cancelled on me.”

Bruce looked up towards Alfred, who nodded in acknowledgement.

“Yes, sure. Of course, I'll meet you. Did you have any place in mind?”

“There’s this sandwich place near Gotham Mall, perhaps we could go there? I’ve been meaning to try it out for a while, but… Well, it’s just never been a right time. I’ll text you the address if you want to.” Something was up with your voice. You didn't usually sound so unconfident, at least not with him.

“I’d appreciate that. I’ll meet you there in 20. That okay?”

“Yeah, that’s perfect. Thank you, Bruce.” There was a small tilt to your voice that Bruce paired up with a smile, and then you hung up.

20? He’d be there in 10.

Bruce was already sitting down by a window, wearing a casual dark blue polo when you walked in. It was impossible to miss him – you found him the most handsome man in the world, with his beautifully carved jawline and his kind eyes.

What were you even saying? You have a boyfriend. Control yourself. If he knew you were even having these thoughts…

Instinctively, you wrapped your jacket tighter around you.

Once Bruce spotted you, he stood up to meet you halfway. You hugged him briefly, tensing under his touch, which he simply chalked up to awkwardness after that night. Had you felt the same he had? Was that why you were acting so strange?

“Thank you for meeting me,” you sighed, sitting down. “My friend cancelled last minute; I didn’t know who else to call. I hope you don’t feel like a last resort or anything – you were actually the first person I thought about.”

Bruce nodded. A waitress came over and asked you both if you would like to see the menu. You looked over at the options and a small smile was pulled from your lips. Once Bruce had picked a Caprese sandwich, you asked for a Pesto Chicken one, and a lemonade. The waitress smiled at you both (well, she smiled at Bruce), grabbed your menus (making it a show of bending over to show off her cleavage) and walked away.

Bruce, however, didn’t seem to notice, seeing as his eyes were on you.

“Is everything okay?”

You looked away, before meeting his gaze. And you smiled. It was gentle, and soft, and fake. Bruce knew, because he plastered on the same smile whenever he had to attend galas full of people whose only interest were his last name and his bank account.

“Yeah! I’m just tired, I think. Haven’t been sleeping well.”

Bruce’s gaze landed on your figure. You were leaning on your right arm, staring absentmindedly at the counter. You were wearing a pretty denim jacket, and a simple purple shirt underneath, as well as a pair of jeans. It wasn’t a very flashy outfit, and yet he thought you looked gorgeous.

“Aren’t you going to take that off?” he asked, nodding towards the jacket you were wearing.

“Hm?” You turned to him and blinked repeatedly. “Oh – no. No need, I’m kind of chilly. How have you been?”

Rather good at deflecting attention, you were. He decided to play along for the time being.

“I’ve been good. Work has been hectic, but what else could you expect when you’re running a company,” he sighed. “I’ve been worried about you, though. You’ve been ignoring me for a few days – are you sure you’re doing okay?”

“Yeah, I’m sure. Work has been hectic as well. The restaurant is going through a few renovations, and we know have more tables to wait. It’s been a hard adjustment, but I’m doing my best.”

“I’m sure you are,” he smiled.

After that, conversation flowed easily, as it usually did between you two. Your sandwiches arrived and you tried each other’s comparing tastes and flavours, trying to prove to each other that your choice was superior. You told him about your new patrons at your job, an old couple who left you extremely big tips and called you “darling” every time you walked by. In return, he told you about this big investor who was interested in a fundraising project to combat poverty in Gotham.

It was as nice as always, and when the bill came, he reached for it without batting an eye.

“Hey – Mr, let me. You can’t just pay for everything.” You chided, reaching out to grab the bill from his hands.

“No, that’s out of the question,” he replied, as casually as asking about the weather. “You don’t have to pay for anything when you’re with me.”

“Bruce,” you whined half-jokingly, still trying to fetch the piece of paper from him. He lifted it over his head, and you huffed, leaning back once again. “You can’t pay for everything every time we’re out.”

“Why not?” Bruce raised an eyebrow. “I’m allowed to spoil you. Aren’t I?”

The word spoil had you turn your head, heat creeping up to your cheeks.

“I don’t deserve to be spoiled.”

“Sure you do. If anyone deserves to be spoiled, it’s you.”

You looked into his eyes for a few moments, unable to form any words. Every time you were with him, you felt your heart warm. You felt like everything was right. It was easy to talk with Bruce. To Bruce. You felt like you could tell him just about anything.

Not anything.

“How about we go for a walk?” Bruce asked. You nodded and moved to get up.

But as you did so, the left sleeve of your jacket got stuck on your table. You pulled away, causing your whole arm to be exposed to him, a large bruise running along it. Your eyes widened and you panicked, forcefully pulling your jacket from the chair, and wrapping it around yourself again.

You heard Bruce call out your name, but you were far too focused on picking up your things and running out of the establishment, Bruce right behind you.

“Hey! Hey! Come black, please! Don’t go!” He wanted to scream, to yell, to reach out to you and hold you tight, but he knew doing any of those things could scare you off. He could lose you forever, and he was not going to let his anger at Nathan cloud his judgement.

You didn’t want to run, though. You crossed the street and stopped right in front of a park bench, tears streaming down your face. Once Bruce caught up with you, he maintained his distance, but remained close enough should you want to come closer. He called your name. Softly. As if it was some sort of prayer, a mantra. It felt nice coming from his lips. He sounded kind. Unlike…

“Who did that to you?” he asked, exasperation in his voice. There was no point dancing around the subject.

“No one. I tripped, and I fell, and I – “

“Please, don’t give me that crap.” His words were harsh, but his voice was soft, and everything was so confusing, all you could do was sit down on the bench in front of you and cry.

“I fell, Bruce. I’m so clumsy, I fell during one of my shifts at the restaurant and that’s all, I promise you.”

Bruce sat down next to you. A few inches, but still, next to you. His mind was running hot with anger. That bastard had done it, he’d actually touched you and hurt you, and Bruce was going to do everything in his power to make sure he never saw the light of the sun again. You raised your head and looked at Bruce. You thought he’d be looking at you with disgust, but there was none in his gaze. Only kindness, only softness.

“It was an accident…” you mumbled, and he had to move closer in order to make out the words you were saying. “It was my fault. I provoked him…”

There it was.

Not his fault. You’d provoked him.

Bruce did his best to school his features. He needed to be calm, he needed to look collected and cool. If he acted out and showed just how angry he was, he might scare you off, and that was the last thing he wanted to do. He didn’t want you to associate him to Nathan, to the monster who’d hurt you.

“Can you tell me what happened?” he asked.

“It, it was my fault…” you sobbed. “He came home from work, and he was so tired… He’d had a really rough day, and all he wanted was to come home to a nice warm dinner, but, but… I was so tired, Bruce, I was so tired, so I didn’t cook – not even for myself! And when he came home, he started shouting and telling me I wasn’t good for anything, that he couldn’t even count on me to make him dinner.” You hid your face in your hands and sobbed louder. “So – so I told him to cook his own dinner, and I know I shouldn’t, because he was so tired! And – and he got mad, and… He... he...”

“Can I come any closer?” you furrowed your brows. Why was Bruce asking that? Why was he being so sweet with you? Especially after you’d just told him you were a terrible girlfriend, being as selfish as to not cook for your boyfriend after a tiring day. But the only thing in his eyes was gentleness. And he was being so sweet with you. Did you even deserve such a treatment?

You nodded your head yes, and he slowly moved closer, hand picking up yours.

“You need to report him to the police.”

Your eyes widened, and you began to shake your head while he spoke.

“He hurt you. This is domestic violence, it’s abuse. You need to report him – “

“No. No, no, no – “

“He can’t keep hurting you like this. All the yelling, all the fights, he’s taking advantage of you, and you don’t deserve any of that. Honey, he’s hurting you – “~

“No, no, no, no, no, no – “

“He’s abusing you.”

“He’s not – he loves me, it was an accident – “

“It wasn’t an accident; he’s hurt you before – “

“He hasn’t!” you exclaimed, shaking your head, “He has not hurt me!”

“Not physically, maybe, but he treats you like shit, which also counts as abuse. Listen to me, please,” he moved closer and slowly lifted his hands to cup your face. He did it slowly, giving you plenty of time to adjust, react, move away from him, do anything to show your discomfort. You did not, so he held your face in a way that showed just how afraid he was that you would break.

“You deserve better. This scumbag is hurting you. Let me help you.”

You looked into his eyes, and the whole thing felt foreign to you. Being held so gently, being talked to so calmly, being regarded as something close to precious, to dear. Wasn’t this how relationships were supposed to go? Wasn’t Nathan supposed to be just like this?

“I love him…” you whispered, attempting to look away. Bruce did not let you. He kept his gaze focused on you. “I can’t leave him Bruce, I… He was so sorry… You should’ve seen him; he was so broken… He regretted it so much.”

"He looked broken because he's trying to fool you." Bruce let go of your face and held your hands in his, hoping to convey everything he meant just by this touch. "I can't stand and watch as he hurts you like this. Please let me do something. Let me help. I'll get him fired. I'll get him arrested. This can't go on; he can't keep hurting you – "

"I love him!" You sobbed, shaking your head. "I do, and he loves me, and he did not mean it! It was an accident! You can't do anything; you can't take him from me! Please, if you care about me in any way, don't do anything. We'll sort it out. I promise you it won't happen again, honest."

Bruce was torn. Torn between storming out of there and beating that asshole boyfriend of yours into a pulp and staying there comforting you. He wanted to do both so badly. He couldn't just stand aside and do nothing, but he also did not want to lose you forever. He could still do it, of course. Hurt Nathan, the same way he'd hurt you. But then he was most definitely sure he'd lose you forever. And would that be worth it? It would. He'd lose you, but you'd be safe. And wasn't that what mattered the most in the end?

"Please, Bruce... Trust me..." You whispered, looking deep into his eyes, trying to find some sort of sign in there that would show you he was still on your side, by your side. Your friends were against you, so was your family. Nathan was right. They were all terrible, they hated you and did not want you to be happy.

With all those people gone, you needed to know you still had Bruce. That despite everyone leaving, he was still yours.

He's not yours though, a little voice said inside your head. You tried to drown it. Who Bruce belongs to is none of your business. And it’s not like he even belongs to someone, he is his own person. Not some property to be handed around carelessly.

You’d never handle him carelessly though. You’d love him. And he’d love you, the way you’re meant to be loved. No. This was wrong. You were not supposed to have these thoughts. You had Nathan. And you loved him.

Did you, though? What had Nathan done for you as of late? Hit you and berate you and fight you and yell at you. Was that even how relationships went?

Sure. That's how passionate relationships went. And you knew Nathan was passionate about you. That’s why he got angry so often, because your love drove him nuts. Loving you drove him nuts. He adored you so much, you made him lose rationality. And wasn't that romantic?

Bruises aren't romantic. Taking care of someone is romantic. Holding them while they cry. Cheering them up with ice-cream and Monopoly, and surprising them at work. What a wonderful boyfriend Bruce would be.

No. Stop it. Those thoughts are wrong.

You looked at Bruce, standing in front of you, regarding you with so much care and worry. How you wished you could just melt in his arms forever. Sometimes you liked to relive how nice it felt to rest in his hold. How natural. You wished you could hug him again and never let go.

It was frightening, really, the way your feelings for Bruce were growing. He’d been just a friend at first, someone you could trust, someone you could spend time with and have fun. But now, he was so much more than that, and you feared the lines between friendship, and something more had begun to blur.

“I’d treat you so much better,” he suddenly blurted, drawing circles on your hand with his thumbs. “You deserve better than him. Please let me do better. Let me show you how you deserve to be loved.”

Tears found their ways to your eyes, and you shook your head, slowly.

You couldn't. No, you couldn't, possibly.

“I’m sorry…” you started, trying to choke back a sob.

“Please. You deserve to be treated with respect. With kindness, with love. Nathan isn't doing any of these things, he’s disrespecting you by laying his hands on you and hurting you all the time.” His face was mere inches away from yours now. Why was he so close? You could smell his cologne, see every speck of light in his eyes, listen to the breath he let out as his lips parted.

It wouldn't hurt to get closer. His lips must taste nice.

It would be wrong. So wrong.

You like him, don't you? And he treats you nice and likes you so much.

You love Nathan. You’d been with him for years now and loved him. He was good for you. He loved you, he provided for you. He paid most of the rent every month and 1bought most of the groceries. Your salary as a waitress could not compare to his, the one of a prestigious doctor. You couldn't leave him. It would ruin you.

Bruce has way more money than him. He would help you get back on your feet.

Quickly, you scrambled to your feet, getting away from him. This was wrong. Extremely wrong. You were dating Nathan. And that was the end of it.

“I'm sorry, Bruce,” you said, sounding more confident than you felt. “I'm in love with Nathan. Please trust me on this. I know what I'm doing.”

“I can’t just stand by and watch as he hurts you.” Bruce's voice held something to it you couldn't quite place. It felt like sorrow, like grief. You hated it. It made your stomach churn.

“He won’t hurt me anymore! He loves me!”

“Are you saying that because you believe it, or because you're trying to?”

The question took you by surprise.

“I…” you stuttered, shaking your hand. “I… I believe it.”

Did you?

“If you care about me Bruce, please let me be. My relationship is none of your concern.”

“What? Please – “

“Please mind your business, Bruce.” You mumbled, pulling your jacket tighter around you, and sighing. “Thank you for the sandwich. I’ll see you around.”

You spun on your heel and walked away, leaving behind a very broken-hearted Bruce Wayne.

You were constantly on Bruce’s mind. You plagued his thoughts 24/7 – your face, your eyes, your smile, your laugh. Again and again, from the moment he woke up, to the second he closed his eyes and fell asleep. You haunted his dreams too. Cried, lovely face covered in black and purple bruises, blood dripping down your mouth. These nightmares usually ended with a blood-curdling scream from you, and Bruce waking up in cold sweats.

It wasn't pleasant. Not at all.

And the worst part was, he had no idea what to do.

“If I report him, he might hurt her even further.”

“Yes, but that was when you had no evidence. You’ve told me she told you he hit her, things are different now, she confessed he was acting abusive towards her.” Alfred said, preparing a cup of tea. Bruce had foregone coffee for a while. Ever since you made it so difficult for him to sleep, Alfred had been trying different methods of getting his boss to sleep.

“Maybe I should have a little run-in with him. Or rather, the Batman should.” Bruce muttered, running a hand through his already messy hair.

“And what good would that make, Master Wayne?”

“I’d tell him to stay away from her. Shake him up a bit. Beat him up. Teach him a lesson.”

“I thought this wasn't about revenge,” the old butler settled a cup of tea in front of Bruce and sat next to him with a sigh. “Master Wayne, may I speak freely?”

“Of course.”

“Gotham has just begun to see Batman as a symbol of hope. You don't want to scare its people by beating up a doctor. Granted, he’s a despicable man who dares hit his partner, but a doctor, nonetheless. It would be foolish to destroy everything you’ve worked so hard to build so far.”

“Then what am I supposed to do, Alfred? How am I supposed to save her if I'm not Batman?”

“That is curious, because I don’t remember hearing the Miss say she liked spending time with the Batman. She did not cling to his arms and cried and told him her darkest secrets. She did not invite him for lunches and afternoon snacks and walks because she liked his company.” He mused. “She did all of that with Bruce Wayne. Perhaps you don't need a mask this time, Master Wayne. Perhaps, this time, being you is enough.”

Bruce thought the words over in his head. Alfred was right – something that happened abnormally often. You had never needed him as Batman. Just Bruce was enough.

“There’s also the fact that your family has left you a rather comfortable fortune, and more prestige that you could ever ask for. I’m sure Bruce Wayne would suffice.”

Bruce chuckled humourlessly, sipping from his cup of tea.

“She won’t open up to me, though. I mean, she will. She told me he was hurting her, that he’d pushed her. But she refused to let me help and said that I couldn't tell a soul. How am I supposed to get her to trust me?”

Alfred hummed.

“Perhaps you should invite her over again. Tell her you would like to talk. Or, you know, go to the police like a regular person and end the nightmare she is undoubtedly living.”

“I’ve done some research, Alfred,” Bruce sighed, “Dr. Nathan Smith is well liked in his community. Volunteers, donates to charity, the whole ordeal. If she tells the police, it was an accident and she fell, they’re likely to believe her. We need something more concrete.”

Alfred hummed once more. He could see where Bruce was coming from. On one hand, it was endearing. He’d never cared so much about someone and was clearly smitten by you. On the other, he was afraid the man would make a move far too late.

“And your plan, Master Wayne, is?”

Bruce dropped his head on the kitchen table. The white marble felt cold against his skin, and he relished in the comfort it provided.

“I don’t know, Alfred. I don’t know.”

“I thought I told you to stop hanging out with her?”

Bruce would recognise that voice anywhere.

As soon as it reached his ears, his fists clenched involuntarily. It seemed to him it was second nature to be angry around that piece of shit.

“Nate, she’s my oldest friend… I miss her terribly; it’s been ages since we've hung out.”

You were walking a few steps ahead of him, arm linked with Nathan’s. Well, rather, Nathan was gripping your arm, and you were simply being pulled along. Harshly.

“Ah, I see. So you’d rather hang out with her than me.” Nathan scoffed and shook his head, and you turned to face him. Bruce could see the heartbreak in your eyes.

“No! That’s not true!”

“She hates me. She doesn’t think we’re good together and wants to break us apart. And you want to hang out with her. Just tell me you want to break up and leave me the fuck alone!”

Nathan shoved you away from him, before shaking his head and walking faster down the road. Your teared up and ran after him. “Nate!” you yelled. “Nate! Please!” Once you reached him, you held onto his hands tightly, trying to get him to stop. He did not. “Please, Nate, I’m sorry! I won’t bring her up again, I promise!”

Nathan kept walking, not even sparing you a glance.

“I promise Nate, I’m so sorry! I’m sorry, please, forgive me!”

No one seemed to give two damns about the two of you. After all, people were selfish and did not care enough about the world around them. Only Bruce’s gaze was on you.

Nathan finally stopped, and sighed, looking at the floor.

“If you want to be her friend, and don’t love me anymore, I get it. That’s okay. You can move out, get your stuff – “

“No! No, I don’t want to be her friend, Nate, I don’t,” you pleaded, holding both his hands and shaking your head vigorously. Bruce felt like a creep, staring at you like that, staring into your private life like that, but what else could he do? “I’m sorry. I won’t bring it up again. I promise. I love you. Okay?” You placed yourself on the tip of your toes to reach his face and kissed his lips gently. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, please, I love you, please forgive me…”

Bruce swore he could see the glint of victory in Nathan’s eyes, and it made his insides churn.

“You promise?”

“I do! I promise! I love you so much, Nate, I won’t talk about her ever again. I love you and only you. You’re the love of my life!” You reached up to kiss him again, and Nathan responded, albeit unexcitedly. It was enough for you though, and you linked your hand with his. “I love you, Nate. So much. You’re the only person I need.”

The blonde man hummed, and you pulled him along. You tried your best to keep him close to you, but he wasn’t responding. That’s when Bruce decided he needed to intervene.

It was only when Bruce said your name a second time, louder, that you turned around, eyes widening with surprise.

“Bruce!” He could tell you weren’t expecting to see him here. He could also tell you were scared. Not of him, of course, but of the man at your side, by the way your whole body tensed, and your eyes drifted from him to Bruce.

“Ah. Bruce.” Nathan spit, looking at him with a fake expression of politeness. Bruce could tell his smile wasn’t real and noticed how his hold tightened on you. “What a coincidence. Have you perhaps been following us?” He laughed dryly. It was a poor attempt at a joke, and an even poorer attempt of figuring out if you’d listened to his whole conversation with you.

“Ah, no. I was just on my way home.”

“What were you up to?” you asked, voice relaxed as it often was when you were around him.

“Well, I'm celebrating the establishment of a new children's school in my family's name. It's a very important cause, and I’m throwing a party later this week. Alfred and I were shopping together.” Bruce replied.

“You? Shopping?” There was a happy tilt to your voice. Bruce only wished you would always sound like that.

“Well, I wasn’t alone. Baby steps.” He chuckled.

“And who is this Alfred?” Nathan interjected. “Some servant of yours?”

Bruce frowned. He did not like the way your boyfriend referred to the man who was the closest thing he had to a family. Still, he wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of anger.

“Alfred is my butler. He has been with my family for many years, and I consider him part of it. He is not a servant, and it shocks me that someone surely so well-read as you would refer to someone with such a degrading term.” Bruce raised his eyebrow, and he could swear he saw Nathan shrink a bit. It made you smile. It made Bruce feel good.

“My apologies, Bruce.” Nathan responded, offering a tight-lipped smile. He did not like losing, and that’s all he felt himself doing when he was around Bruce Wayne. Losing his temper, losing his control, losing his upper hand. It was something he detested greatly. He needed to get away from there. And quick.

“Honey, we need to go. Don’t want to steal too much of Bruce’s time, do we?”

“It’s not a problem, really,” Bruce retorted, ignoring your boyfriend, and turning to you instead. That’s when he noticed what you were wearing. Another jacket – a big one, oversized, a turtleneck and a pair of jeans. Gone were your shorts and flowy tops, you were now covered from head to toe. Why? To conceal what, exactly? And now that he got a good look at your face, was the hell was going on with your lip? It seemed split. “There’s nothing else in my list. Say, do you have any plans for next Friday? I would love if you two stopped by. It’s for a good cause, and perhaps you’ll have fun?”

He had to get you there. He had to get you alone with him, safe, away from Nathan.

“A party? At Wayne Manor?” Nathan asked.

“Yes. Will you be there?”

You looked up at your boyfriend, hope in your eyes.

Nathan noticed your excitement and blew air through his nose – the closest you’d get to a chuckle.

“Of course. We would love to go.”

“Really?” You beamed. That was not the answer you were expecting from him. Nathan hated Bruce – you knew this. Did this mean he was trying? Trying to befriend your friends? For your sake?

“Of course.” Nathan bent down to kiss your forehead, earning a genuine smile from you. “If you’d like to.”

“I would!”

It was small, the notion of a happy relationship, the notion that you were happy. But Bruce saw right through it. None of it was real. He was just playing a part.

“We should get going. It was nice seeing you, Bruce.”

“Oh – okay!” you yelped when Nathan turned you around and pulled you along with him. “It was nice seeing you, Bruce! I’ll see you Friday!”

And just like that, you were gone.

But Bruce wasn’t one to give up. Something felt off. Something smelled fishy. Nathan had been too kind, too nice, too allowing. Was it all a façade? He knew Nathan would never allow you to go to a party, especially one hosted by him. Something was definitely up. His feet moved, and before he could realise it, he was following the two figures in front of him to a dark alley. He heard voices and walked deeper.

That’s how he found you, pressed up against the wall, Nathan’s hand cruelly pressed against the hollow of your throat.

“Why the fuck are you still talking to him?” Nathan grumbled, tightening the hold he had on your throat. His knuckles turned white. “Huh!? You say you love me and then go around and fuck that rich motherfucker? Is that it, yeah?”

“N-No!” you sobbed, struggling to breath. Tears streamed down your face, hands clutching his. “Nate, please. You’re hurting me.” Your words were interrupted by coughs, and just before your vision could go completely black, you saw Nathan get dragged around and thrown on the floor. As soon as your vision (and your air) returned, you saw Bruce do to Nathan what he’d done to you.

“How dare you lay your disgusting hands on her,” he bellowed, and you somehow recognised that voice. It felt familiar. Bruce turned to you, and shook his head, arm still against Nathan’s neck. “Are you okay?” You nodded silently, wiping your tears, and taking a few steps back.

Bruce was surprised no one else had interrupted the two of you, but then again, this was Gotham. It didn’t matter if Batman was ridding crime for good, people would still look the other way, far too accustomed to violence to even bother.

“Are you seriously going to let him do this?” Nathan scowled, fighting against Bruce’s iron grip – it was no use. Somehow, this rich dumb playboy was stronger than he looked.

“I… I…” You looked in between the two men, still wiping your tears away. Part of you wanted Bruce to teach him a lesson. The other wanted him to let go of your boyfriend.

“Fuck – do something! Are you going to let this brute hurt me like this!?”

“Keep your filthy mouth shut,” Bruce whispered, before turning to face you completely. “What do you want me to do?”

This surprised you. You had a choice? You could decide?

“If you want to, I’ll beat him to a pulp myself. We’ll take him to the police. I’ll protect you. I promise I will. I can take care of you. You will never have to look him in the eye again.” Bruce’s eyes were filled with longing, and you found yourself walking towards him.

Wouldn’t that be nice? Nathan could go to jail. He’d leave you alone forever. No more fighting, no more hitting you, no more hurting you. You’d be free.

“Tell him to let go!” Now, Nathan’s face was turning a nasty shade of purple, and his lovely blue eyes were wide with fear. “Tell him! Are you going to let him do this to me? I love you!”

Bruce said your name softly. “Don’t listen to him. He’s done nothing but lie to you over and over again. You can end this nightmare right now.”

“Please! I’ll be better! I promise” Nathan coughed, the lack of air getting to him. “I was just jealous! You know me, I – I get like this! I thought you were going to leave me for him! I can’t compete with Bruce Wayne.”

“Shut up.” Bruce shook his head. “All you’ve been doing is hurting her. Abusing her. Do you seriously think I’m letting you go unscathed?”

It was scary, to be honest, seeing Bruce like this. You’d never seen him this angry, and he somehow reminded you of Nathan. Granted, the anger wasn’t directed towards you, but it still made you feel uneasy and unsafe, and all you wanted him was to go back to the sweet and kind Bruce who stole spoonfulls of your ice-cream and cheated at Monopoly when you weren’t looking.

“Bruce?” you whispered, frozen in place.

“Yeah?”

“Let go.”

“What?”

“Please let go.”

He looked at you and noticed the fear in your eyes. Something inside him broke and he wanted to punish himself for making you feel like that. Were you afraid of him? His hold on Nathan’s neck loosened, and the latter took this as an opportunity to get away and walk towards you. Nathan embraced you tightly, burrowing his face in your hair and crying loudly.

“I’m so sorry… I hate myself for the way I’ve been treating you… You deserve so much better than me, and I don’t deserve your forgiveness… I’m just a mess who seems to ruin everything… Please forgive me for being so possessive, I just – I just never feel like I’m worthy of you.” Nathan’s lies spilled from his lips, and the very same lips found their way to yours, kissing you softly as he held your face in his hands.

You seemed unresponsive, though, eyes fixed on Bruce. Was this how he always behaved? Had you simply not seen it before? Would he act this way towards you?

“I’m sorry…” his voice somehow got through to you. “I just… I couldn’t just stand by and watch as he hurt you…”

It was true, you gathered. He’d said it before. He’d always put himself between you and Nathan whenever you two fought. He’d never allowed Nathan to mistreat you in front of him, always protecting you – or trying to – no matter what.

Still, it had been horrifying to see those eyes who regarded you with such kindness, look at someone else with nothing but rage. To hear that lovely voice that always cheered you up sound so hateful. It wasn’t your Bruce. It simply wasn’t.

Your arms wrapped themselves around Nathan’s torso, almost as if mechanically. You had to do it. It’s what you did. Nathan yelled and fought and hurt. And then he’d apologize and take you back. It made you feel sick and nauseous and empty inside. But you knew no one else you love you like he did. No one would love you as passionately as Nathan did. And you didn’t want to be all alone.

“Let’s go home, okay, baby?” he asked, one hand caressing your cheek, the other rubbing circles on your hip affectionately. “We can cuddle and watch a movie. Anything you like. How does that sound?”

“Don’t,” Bruce pleaded, eyebrows furrowing. Were you seriously still going home with him? After all that had happened?

You did not break eye contact. You knew you shouldn’t go back home with Nate. At least a part of you did. A part of you knew this was wrong. Knew that you deserved better, knew that Nate was abusive and did not deserve you. But that part had long been defeated, and all that was left were small voices in your head that yelled “No one else is going to love you like this” repeatedly.

And you always let them win.

“Let’s go,” you mumbled.

Nathan wrapped his arm around your waist, kissed your forehead, and Bruce watched as you two left the alley.

You did not text him anymore.

And on Friday, none of you appeared at the Manor for the party.

It was close to 2 in the morning when Bruce was stirred awake by the sounds of knocking on his front door.

He’d fallen asleep on the couch, exhausted from exploring a few new gadgets and functions Lucius had implemented on his suit. Patrol had been rough on him, the new holographic projection system taking a while to get used to, but well worth it in the end. It would spare him a handful of bruises and stress.

Alfred had retired for the night long ago, so it was just Bruce, a copy of a book you’d mentioned in passing once and he decided to read, and a fire cackling in the fireplace.

He got up, groggily rubbed the sleep out of his eyes and made his way towards the door. Far too tired to be careful (really, who the hell would be knocking at his door at 2 in the morning? And it’s not like he could blink the sleep away in a matter of seconds. He had enough training for that) Bruce opened the door, coming face to face with a hunched figure.

“This better be good for you to be knocking on my god damned door at 2 in the morning –“

That’s when the figure in front of him shifted. It was no longer a mere figure. It was you.

You were hunched over, looking down, head covering your whole face, and Bruce could make out faint sobbing. He called your name once, twice, three times, softly. All you could do was shake your head. hands tightly clutched in front of you.

“Come on, let’s go inside.”

Bruce stepped aside so you could walk in. He would not touch you without your permission, without not knowing what had happened. You stepped inside, shaking all over. The clothes on your body were comprised of a flimsy pyjama set, a long-sleeved shirt, and a pair of pants. Your feet were bare save for the fluffy bunny slippers on them. You looked cold – had you left in a hurry?

“Hey, can we sit on the couch?” Bruce asked, fluffing up some pillows. You nodded and followed him, sitting down, head still hung low. Would you even look at him?

“Do you want something to drink?” He kneeled next to you but did not try to look into your eyes. He wanted to be on the same level as you, make you feel safe, but also give you the space and freedom to move away from him should you want that. He’d never want to smother you. You nodded your head softly, and Bruce was quick to move to the kitchen. He knew your favourite by heart, and within a few minutes, had it prepared and on top of the coffee table in front of you. “There it is,” he mumbled, sitting back again. He'd wait for you to take the first step.

And when you did, all the air left his lungs.

You looked up, hair clinging to your sweaty forehead, silent tears streaming down your face. Most of the lights were off, the fire being the only thing illuminating your features. Your delicate lips, your nose, your beautiful eyes, and the black and purple bruise surrounding one of them. The look Bruce gave you, whatever it was, just made you sob uncontrollably once again. He didn’t know if whether to touch you, come closer or back off, but you answered that question yourself when you wrapped your arms around him, sobbing loudly.

“I’m sorry…” you sobbed, holding onto him tightly. Bruce reciprocated the hug, spreading his legs so you could move comfortably in between them. He adjusted you in his lap and kissed your forehead, just holding you tightly.

“No, none of that,” he shushed you, rocking both your bodies back and forth. “You don’t have to apologize. Never.”

“It wasn’t my fault… it wasn’t Bruce, you have to believe me…”

“I do. I believe you. It’s not your fault.”

He wanted to know what the hell that jerk had done to you. But he knew he couldn’t – you might close yourself off even more and refuse to talk if he pressed further.

So, he made sure you were comfortable. Bruce picked you up and moved to the couch, covering both of your bodies with a blanket, and pulling you closer. You took the hint immediately, snuggling up as close as possible to him, face pressed against his neck. You were hiding from him, but it felt nice to be in his arms.

The two of you stayed like that for a while. Bruce turned on the TV and allowed you to pick a channel (“Mhm” for yes and “Hm-hm” for no) until you were watching some silly rom-com that got you chuckling occasionally. Bruce was stroking your arms gently, bending down to press kisses against your forehead whenever he felt you might need them. He wasn’t paying any attention to the movie in front of him, instead coming up with a plan to throw that idiot in jail.

After you’d finished your drink, you gathered the courage to shift in his lap and completely face him. The bruise covering your eye was on full display, and Bruce could now make out the dried blood on your lip.

“He… he hurt me, Bruce…” you mumbled, reaching for his hand. Bruce squeezed yours tightly, a silent reminder that he was there and listening, and that you weren’t alone. “I’m so scared… He pushed me and kept hitting me, and I was begging him to stop but he wouldn’t… I didn’t know what else to do, so I just waited for him to fall asleep and ran… I had to – I had to wait. He wanted to sleep next to me. He kept apologizing and promising he’d be better, so I told him it was okay, and I went to bed with him…” Bruce wiped away your tears, nodding along. Outside, he was the picture of compassion and sympathy. Inside, a fire was burning, and he had to control every bone in his body not to get into his car and drive to your (hopefully ex by now) boyfriend’s house.

“You’re so brave,” he muttered, running his hand through your hair to soothe you. “I can’t believe how hard that must’ve been. But you’re so brave, and I’m so proud of you.”

“I thought he could change,” you started to sob, shaking your head. “He – he said he would. He said that he loved me a lot and he’d only hit me because he was jealous and afraid I would leave him. All because I told him I regretted not going to your party that Friday… I’m so sorry, Bruce.”

“No apologies needed. You’re not the one to blame here, okay? It’s him, and him alone.” His hands reached up to wipe your tears, and you flinched, the pressure of his fingers on your bruise sending painful memories through your head. “Sorry,” he mumbled. “Let’s take care of this, shall we?”

And he did.

Bruce took you to the master bathroom and sat you on top of the counter while he fetched his first-aid kit and a few ointments and creams. Your hands never left him as he worked – on his shirt, on his shoulders, on his hands. He cleaned the bruise with some water and pressed an ice pack against it to reduce the swelling. He told you a few anecdotes that had happened at Wayne Enterprises – angry costumers who tried to scam him, spilled coffees, and other amusing situations – to keep you grounded. His voice was like a lifeline to you.

After the swelling was taken care of, he softly applied ointment around your eye, being careful as to not put too much pressure on the pads of his fingers. He smeared some of it on the tip of your nose, earning a smile from you, before moving on to your lip and taking care of it too. Once all was done, he took a step back.

“Don’t look at me like that…�� you mumbled, looking away.

“How?”

“Like that. Like I’m pitiable.”

“Hm.” Bruce tilted his head, pretending to think your statement over, “No. Not pitiable – that’s not who I’m looking at.”

You met his gaze again.

“I’m looking at the bravest woman I have probably ever known.” He crouched in front of you to stay at your eye level. Your hands did not leave his. “I’m looking at a remarkable woman, one with a big heart and a courageous spirit. You’ve endured all of this, and you’re still standing.”

“I’m a coward, Bruce,” you shook your head. “I let him to this to me. I let him break me. He’s right – who would ever love me after him? Who will ever love me like him? Maybe this was a mistake – I shouldn’t have left me. He’s the only one who will love me as I am.”

Bruce was quick to refute you.

“He’s wrong. I hope you know just how wrong he is. Nathan has spent all this time hurting you, lying to you.”

“He hasn’t – I’m broken, I’m damaged goods – who will ever want me?”

“You’re not damaged goods. You hear me? You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. You’re so kind and brave. What you endured is beyond me, and I know I will never understand it, but please believe me when I say that you’re not broken. You’re not damaged. And Nathan is not right. He’s lied to you.”

You looked at him and searched his eyes for any sign of falsehood, of deceit. All you found was kindness. And a warmer emotion you couldn’t pinpoint yet but wanted to figure out.

“You light up even the darkest of days,” Bruce mumbled, moving closer to you. His hand moved to cup your face and you instinctively pressed against it. You’d never felt safer than whenever you were in Bruce’s arms. “And I will do everything in my power to protect you. To keep you safe. The truth is…” He looked at the floor for a few seconds, before meeting your eyes again. “I love you.” You sucked in a breath. “I have, for a while. And I know that’s not what you want to hear right now, nor what you need to hear. And I’m not saying this to force you to be with me, especially after I took care of you. What I’m trying to say is, I don’t expect compensation. I don’t. I’m just saying this because – because I want you to know Nathan is wrong. You’re not damaged goods. And I love you. So much. Ever since I met you, my life has been happier, brighter. For years I’ve had a hole inside of me. Something empty, something that would eat me up from the inside. But then you came along. And you filled that void. And Nathan is so, so wrong, because how could someone not love you? How could someone not love you? How could he try and make you believe you’re not worthy of love, when that’s all you deserve?”

Tears were now streaming down both of your faces. Bruce had never been this vulnerable before, and to his surprise, it didn’t hurt nor scare him. It felt right, to trust you like this, to open up.

“You don’t need to say it back. Please don’t feel forced to say it back. I just wanted you to know that you’re worthy of love, and that I’ll be here to help you. Always. Even if all you feel towards me is friendship. I’ll protect you forever, I promise. He will never touch you again. No one will.”

When you did not reply, Bruce’s stomach fell. Had he screwed up? Had this been a terrible occasion to let you know of his feelings? It wasn’t ideal, no, but he had to tell you. Fuck. He had screwed up, didn’t he? And now he would lose you forever –

You interrupted his thoughts, hands on his jaw, pulling him closer. You blinked slowly – once, twice.

“I love you too,” you whispered, afraid that should you say it any louder, the fantasy might break. “I think I have for a while too. But I was so scared, Bruce… I have nothing to offer – I work a shitty job, and Nathan was paying for everything. My bills, my groceries, my clothes. I was so afraid of leaving. And then whenever I was with you, all I felt… Was happiness.” You chuckled through the tears. “You made me feel so happy, Bruce. And so safe. I always feel safe with you. But I was so scared… I’m so sorry…”

“No – shh. You don’t have to say you’re sorry,” Bruce shook his head, turning to place a kiss on your palm. “You’re so brave. Have I said this already? You’re so brave. I’m so sorry for everything you had to endure. I’m so sorry I didn’t do anything earlier. Shit, I’m an idiot. I should’ve reported him to the police as soon as I realised he was hurting you, but I was too scared he’d turn their heads and you’d get the short end of the stick.”

You smiled, something warm blooming in your chest. Bruce really did care for you, didn’t he?

“My plan was to report him, but I didn’t know if you’d lie to the police in order to cover everything up. I was afraid you would, and he would hurt you further. I’m sorry.”

You repeated his words back to him.

“You don’t have to be sorry. You always stood up for me whenever Nathan was around. You never let him talk to me the way he did whenever you were there. I just wish I hadn’t been so blind… I wish I’d trusted you the first time you told me he was no good… It’s just – we’d been together for so long, and I was so afraid to leave him. Nathan was all I knew. I didn’t want to be alone. I didn’t want to be unloved.”

“You’re not.” Bruce shook his head again. “Not unloved. I love you. You’re worthy of love, and happiness, and kindness, and good things.”

You nodded at him, a single tear running down your cheek. This one, however, was a tear of happiness. Your eyes flickered to his lips, and Bruce whispered.

“Can I kiss you?”

You chuckled.

Bruce raised an eyebrow.

“Is this funny?” he asked with a smile.

“You’re always asking for my permission. If you can touch me, if you can hold me.”

“I would never do anything you were uncomfortable with. Anything you didn’t want.”

“Yes.”

“Yes?”

“Please kiss me,” you mumbled, and no other words were needed, as Bruce closed the space between the two of you and kissed you on the lips.

It was the softest kiss you’d ever had in your entire life. There was no roughness, no edge, no anger, or rage – all the things Nathan kissed you with. Bruce, however, kissed you with love. His lips moved in tandem with yours, brushing and caressing and telling a story of tenderness and warmth. It felt nice. It felt perfect. It felt like you had been made to kiss him. You pulled him up by his shirt, and he did so, placing his hands on either side of the marble to trap you. Your legs spread instinctively to accommodate him, and his hands brushed against your cheeks and hair, fingers shyly exploring, afraid to break the moment he’d been waiting for for so long. It was only a shame it had to be in these circumstances.

When breathing became more important than kissing, you pulled away and Bruce pulled you against his chest. You breathed him in, the smell of cologne and bodywash and something so inherently Bruce calming you down almost instantly.

“Please don’t leave me,” You whispered, gripping his shirt as if it was the only thing keeping you alive right now. And maybe it was. You needed him.

“I wouldn’t even dream of it,” he whispered back, kissing your forehead. “And I’ll fix this. We will fix this.”

“What if he comes after me? He’s a very respected doctor, Bruce, I – I don’t want him to hurt you or anything.”

This caused Bruce to chuckle and pull you back to look at your face. Even with a terrible bruise covering your features, you were the most beautiful women he’d ever laid eyes on. Your courage and kindness only added to that charm. What a lucky guy he was.

“I don’t usually brag about my status, but I happen to be Bruce Wayne. I’ll take care of him. I promise. You won’t have to worry about anything.”

“Promise?”

“I promise. He won’t be able to hurt you anymore.”

You smiled. Bruce loved your smile.

“Do you want to get some sleep?” he asked, caressing the side of your cheek that wasn’t bruised. “I can sleep in one of the guest rooms. My bed is quite comfortable, you can stay there. Unless you want to stay somewhere else? I won’t force you to stay here.”

You shook your head.

“Here is fine. Although…”

“Yes? I’ll do anything.”

A blush crept up on your features.

“I… I don’t want to be alone tonight. I can’t.”

Bruce nodded.

“Do you want me to stay with you?”

“Please.”

Bruce gave you a soft look, a quiet question, asking for your permission. You answered it by lifting your arms and allowing him to pick you up and carry you to his bedroom. He laid you down on his bed, and you sighed at how comfortable it was. He smiled. You looked content as you adjusted, getting under the covers.

“Are you going to join me or just stare at me like that?”

“I’m just happy you’re here. Safe, with me,” he said. “I’m sorry the circumstances were… not the best.”

“I’m here now, though, aren’t I? And so are you.”

“I am. I’m not going anywhere.”

Bruce moved and laid down next to you, pulling the covers over himself. “Can I?” he asked. You nodded, and he wrapped an arm around you, bringing you close to his chest. Your bodies fit perfectly together, like two pieces of a puzzle that had come together at last. You entwined your legs with his and rested your head on his chest while his arms snaked around you, protecting you even in your sleep. The beat of his heart soothed you and lulled you to slumber in an instant.

Before you lost conscience, you felt Bruce’s lips move against your head, and made out a soft “I love you”.

It was the best you’d ever slept.

It was hard adjusting to live after that, but Bruce was there for you every step of the way.

You finally filed a report against Nathan. It was tough, and you cried and doubted yourself when you gave your statement, but with Bruce by your side, you felt like you could do it. He reminded you of how brave you really were, and how much you could accomplish – with him or without him. But you liked his company anyway.

Thanks to Bruce’s resources, an investigation was conducted. You’d kept records of nearly every time the two of you fought in your diary, and even photographed every bruise he’d given you. He did not know of this, of course. You did it whenever he was asleep, a small voice in your head telling you it’d be useful to bring him down.

Apparently that little voice had been right, and your pictures were essential for the investigation.

Your friends testified in your favour, and you had cried when they’d hugged you after, congratulating you on your bravery, and lamenting what you’d gone through. You’d missed them so much.

All seemed like it was going in the right direction.

Your old apartment had been cleared, and although you’d gotten a place of your own (Bruce told you he did not want you to feel like you had to move in with him simply because he was helping you out and you two were in the beginning of a relationship), you found yourself spending more time at Bruce’s manor than your own house, and you quickly sold it in order to move in with him.

Everything was going perfectly.

You felt happy – more than ever – going about your daily job, meeting with friends for coffee and lunch and walks on the park without being berated or yelled at. Bruce supported you on every endeavour you went on, encouraging you to spend time with your friends and go out with them, instead of keeping you home all to himself like Nathan did.

In fact, Bruce was the perfect boyfriend. He’d bring you breakfast in bed sometimes, offer you rides to your job, bring you flowers when he could tell you’d had a hard day, and even when he had to cancel date nights or other plans you two had made because of some last minute emergency at Wayne Enterprises, he made it up to you later, with lots of love and reassurance, perhaps a bouquet of flowers and a ticket to whatever event you’d been interested in.

Bruce reminded you of what love felt like. True love. He never raised his voice at you, opting to voice out his concerns in a calming manner. He never made you feel like you weren’t worthy of him – quite the contrary. Every single day, he thanked you for choosing him, letting you know just how lucky he was to have you in his life.

Alfred liked you too – very much. He adopted you as his family rather quickly, teaching you how to make your favourite drinks (even better than you used to do them), and spending time with you whenever Bruce wasn’t home, and you felt particularly lonely. He liked having you around. In his opinion, “Master Wayne was in need of a woman’s touch in his house and his life”. You couldn’t agree more and loved him immensely.

There was only one time you crossed paths with Nathan after you’d left him that night.

The Gotham Police had gathered enough information and evidence to build a case against him, and you’d been called to testify. You weren’t sure you wanted to do it – you were still scared of whatever he could do to you.

That day, Bruce sat you down on his lap, kissed your forehead and promised Nathan wouldn’t even be able to touch you, and that he and your friends would be there.

It was all the reassurance you needed, and although you choked back a sob once or twice once your gaze met his, your testimony was clear and strong, and it was enough for the trial to be wrapped up in around two days (and perhaps Bruce had pulled a few strings to get it over it so quickly, but you didn’t need to know that, now did you?)

As he was being handcuffed, Nathan turned to you, face twisted in agony.

“Babe – “ he yelled, doing his best to free himself from the police officers’ grips. “I’m so sorry – tell them this is just a misunderstanding! Tell them! I love you so much, fuck, don’t let them do this to me!”

When it was obvious you weren’t going to give him the satisfaction of an answer, he furrowed his eyebrows.

“You slut! You stupid bitch! I bet you’re fucking him, aren’t you? You’re fucking the rich bastard, aren’t you? I knew it! You’re a slut – you’re disgusting! No one will ever love you as I loved you, you’re a slut now, and you’ll be a slut fore – “

Bruce’s fist collided with Nathan’s face, promptly shutting him the fuck up. He adjusted his cuffs and his blazer and offered you a doe-eyed look.

“I didn’t do anything. I don’t know what you’re talking about. Officers, I’ll be sure to guarantee you all a very nice Christmas bonus if you keep this little incident in between us.”

The excited nods from the officers around him were enough of an answer for him to walk away unscathed. That, and your giggles.

“Couldn’t stand hearing him go on and on about you like that,” he’d muttered to you lately as you cuddled up together on the couch and watched a movie.

That was the last you saw and heard of Nathan. You’d heard Bruce tell Alfred that he was going to be locked up for eternity one day, and while it was suspicious (surely it wouldn’t warrant him a life sentence, would it?), the thought of Bruce using his influence to put your abusive ex-boyfriend behind bars forever made you smile.

Right now, you were sitting on top of a plaid picnic blanket in the gardens of Wayne Manor. On your right hand was a book, on your left hand the chocolate brown curls of your boyfriend, whose head was resting on top of your lap.

You had never felt so at peace with yourself.

Your physical scars had faded, bruises had healed, leaving your soft skin as it once was, but you were sure the emotional ones would remain. Luckily, you had the best boyfriend in the world to aid you in every step of the way.

His voice pulled you from your thoughts.

“You’re beautiful,” he mumbled, eyes closed. This was one of his favourite things to do – lay on your lap after a hard week and relax under the sun. It was one of your favourites as well. You got to spend time with the person you loved the most and remind yourself that even though your life was so dark once, it could get better. It was getting better.

“You’re not so bad yourself, handsome.”

“Not so bad?”

“Fine. You’re the most handsome man I have ever seen in my entire life.”

“Hmm. That’s a lot of responsibility.” He raised an eyebrow.

“I think you’ll manage.”

Bruce chuckled and lifted his head up ever so slightly. You rolled your eyes with a smile. How needy. Bending down, you met him halfway, kissing him tenderly. His tongue swept over your lower lip, and you sighed contentedly before he pulled away and closed his eyes.

“I love you.”

“I love you too, Bruce. So much.”

Yes.

Everything was going to be better.

A/N: And that's it! Oh my god what a rollercoaster hahaha! I hope you guys enjoyed this! I understand all abusive relationships are different - a lot of this came from my own experience.

I also hope the ending, the little epilogue wasn't too rushed! I wanted it to be a nice conclusion, not dwelling too much on the past, but rather focusing on the hope of the future.

Alright, this is all! I think I'll take a break from Bruce fics for a while, hahaha. Once again, I really do hope you all enjoyed this.

Have a wonderful day ahead! <3

#bruce wayne x reader #bruce wayne x y/n #bruce wayne x you #bale!bruce wayne #bale!batman x reader #bale!batman #bale!bruce wayne x reader #the dark knight #the dark knight trilogy #nolanverse #the dark knight fanfiction #the dark knight fanfic #bruce wayne fanfiction #bruce wayne x fem!reader

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mono-moonchilds · 1 year

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NOT THE ONLY ONE | JJK

⤑ pairing: jungkook x fem!reader

⤑ genre: smut and angst

⤑ rating: explicit (18+)

⤑ word count: 3.3K

⤑ summary: whoever said that the truth would set you free was a liar. the truth was cold and it hurt. and sometimes it still left you stuck in the same cycle.

⤑ warnings: college fic, jk is an asshole, manipulative behavior, infidelity, gaslighting, sad!reader, unprotected sex, creampie, oc wants to be loved, toxic relationship

⤑ part one

The morning after was always the worst.

A harsh feeling of shame washing over every step you took as you made your way through the campus. Realistically no one knew. There was no way they could. It wasn’t like Jungkook was going to tell anyone and you definitely weren’t either. But despite knowing that it still didn’t help. It felt like everyone was staring at you- quietly judging you for the decisions you made.

Could you blame them though?

You knew exactly how everything was going to end the moment you saw Jungkook at your door. The worst part was that you’d do it again. Despite the shame and the sadness, you’d do it all over again just for those few fleeting moments of happiness.

It was pathetic.

Always craving more of Jungkook even after he showed you his true colors time after time. Always trying to convince yourself of the maybes. That maybe he would be true this time, maybe he’d stay, maybe he would simply see that you were worth it. That you were worth his time, his energy, his commitment.

It was something about never being the first choice that really fucked with someone’s well-being. Fucked with the way you carried yourself- the way you looked at yourself. Sometimes when you looked at old photos you couldn’t even recognize the person you saw. The bright smile you once sported was so foreign and far to you now.

“Y/n!” You turned to see Hoseok jogging your way. The sweet smile he always sported etched across his face just like usual. “I’ve been calling your name for a while now.”

“Ah- sorry. Didn’t even hear you.”

“I’m about to go meet Yoongi for lunch you wanna come?”

“I got a class that starts in like fifteen minutes,”

“Gross,” Hoseok gagged in disgust. “Come on just ditch this once. I got shit to tell you about last night.”

“I can’t. It’s one of Professor Williams’ classes. You know how she is.”

Right on cue, just like it always did when Hoseok heard that name, the smile on his face dropped only to be quickly replaced with genuine annoyance and anger. “Fucking hate that bitch,” He grumbled with a scowl.

You couldn’t help but laugh. “For some reason, something tells me the feeling is most likely mutual.”

Hoseok rolled his eyes. “I got weed,” He reached into his pocket pulling out a baggy. “Top tier gossip and weed. You’re crazy if you turn this down.”

“As tempted as I am, I still gotta say no. Top tier gossip and weed or my literal grade in a class that I pay to attend.” You held up your hands as if you were physically weighing both options. “I think we both know the obvious choice here.”

Hoseok booed, quite literally booed, throwing down both thumbs in the process. “Fine. Even though we both know you could tell that woman you murdered someone and she would still let you make up anything you missed. What’s the point of being the teacher's pet if you don’t use it for your advantage?”

“Save me some and tell me everything when I get home later?”

“I don’t know,” Hoseok shrugged. “I may not be in a talky mood later.”

It was silent for only a moment before the two of you both burst into laughter. Hoseok not being in the mood to talk? That was like a fish suddenly deciding it could live without water. It was never going to happen.

As you watched Hoseok leave, the tiny slither of okay-ness that you’d briefly felt left with him. Maybe you should just ditch class this once. Realistically what harm could it do? You were already ahead in your work and like Hoseok said Professor Williams wasn’t going to do anything to you if you missed a class. God knows you could use the distraction. The second Hoseok left; your brain immediately went back to Jungkook.

What was he doing? What was he thinking? Did he feel bad for leaving you like that? Did he feel bad for the way he treated you?

You already knew the answer to these questions, but you still couldn’t help but think of the maybes. Those damn maybes and the endless possibilities they could hold were going to be your downfall.

“H-,” You were about to call out to Hoseok telling him to wait up when something stopped you in your tracks.

More accurately- someone stopped you in your tracks.

If you didn’t know any better, you would’ve sworn that you were having a heart attack. The pain in your chest is almost enough to knock you to your knees. You blink once, twice, and then a third trying to convince yourself that you were going crazy. That you’d finally lost it and were just seeing things.

But no matter how much you blinked or rubbed, the sight just wouldn’t go away. It was real. The girl clinging to Jungkook’s arm was very real. You wanted to believe that it was something new- that she was just another fling like you but there was something that was off. The way the two of them held each other had a sense of familiarity. The way their hands and eyes lingered. This wasn’t a fling and it definitely wasn’t anything new.

It was cultivated.

It was seasoned.

It was everything you wanted.

“I love you,” The girl leaned up pressing a long kiss to Jungkook’s lips. Even the way he smiled- it was something that you’d never seen before. The small smile on his face as he stared down at her with nothing but adoration in his eyes.

“Love you too baby.”

Your heart shattered.

When the two turn to go their separate ways Jungkook notices you. His mouth fell open a little as he looked between you and his girlfriend. She was none the wiser. A happy little bounce in her step as she entered the nearest building. Jungkook said nothing and neither did you. In fact, you did the exact opposite. You turned and ran, hightailing it out of there as fast as you could. There was this hope that Jungkook would yell after you, that he would chase you down and say something.

He never did.

Her name was Imani.

She was an education major. She had an older sister, a German Sheppard, and two loving parents. She liked taking pictures of sunsets. Always posted her adventures with her friends. Had more community service under her belt than a delinquent teen that was being forced by the state. She’d been on two study-abroad trips. One in Japan and the other in Brazil. And as recently as last semester she’d transferred into the University after leaving one that’d been closer home.

She was kind of difficult to find. And for a moment you thought maybe you were seeing things. From Jungkook’s Instagram page, you would’ve never even assumed he had a girlfriend. Most of his pictures consumed him at the gym or of random food he’d eaten. There were no pictures of her or them together and Jungkook had his tags hidden. It wasn’t until you went through the comments of ten different pictures that you found her.

l0V3lY.M4N1: my baby is so handsome 😍

Jungk00k: 💖💖💖

Her page told a different story.

Jungkook was everywhere. He was in a post as recent as a week ago and one as old as five years ago.

Imani and Jungkook had been together since their junior year of high school.

They’d attended prom together, went to each other’s family functions, hell- they spent holidays together.

If you weren’t so close to the verge of tears you’d laugh. The whole thing is hilarious in a sick way. This entire time you’d been hoping- praying that Jungkook would see you as a person when in reality he already had his person. He’d had her for half a decade. She was pretty and vibrant. Kind of reminded you of those girls you’d see on Pinterest. Perfect makeup, perfect hair, cute clothes.

You were a mess. The fading pink curls on your head matted together. The sweat jacket and pants you had on hung sloppily against your body.

With a loud noise, Jungkook's name pops across your screen. You immediately send him to voicemail. He doesn’t give up though. No matter how many times you decline the call Jungkook keeps calling again and again and again. You could’ve easily blocked him but something about the persistence he was finally making made your heart flutter in a sad way. A sick smile creeping onto your mouth each time his name popped back up. After the tenth time, you couldn’t help but swipe your thumb across.

“Open the damn door.” Click. There was a heavy knock. Your hand was already on the doorknob before you could even let out the next breath.

When the opened the door, it was like muscle memory. A loud smack echoed through the hall.

“Damn,” A distant voice in the hall echoed out.

Jungkook’s head slowly turned back to face you. His eyes were low with anger. “That make you feel better?” He huffed out.

“No. Go the fuck home Jungkook.”

Of course, he didn’t listen. Just like the night before he pushed his way into the apartment shutting the door behind him.

“List-”

“You’re a real piece of shit you know that right?” You cut him off. “Just when I think you couldn’t get any worse you prove me wrong. You have a girlfriend!”

“It doesn’t mean anything,”

You blinked in disbelief. Did he really just say that? You couldn’t help but laugh. Jungkook stared at you like you’d grown two heads. His face twisted between a mix of discomfort and confusion.

“You’ve been together for five years.”

“How do you even know that?”

You held up your phone flicking on the screen. “It’s all right here,”

“What the fuck,” Jungkook attempted to reach for the phone, but you were too quick. Stepping back, you smoothly moved it away. “Are you fucking crazy!” You jumped at the sound of Jungkook’s booming voice.

There was nothing but pure disgust on his face and even though it should’ve truly been the opposite way around you couldn’t help but feel shame.

“What is wrong with you?”

You couldn’t even answer. The phone you were holding so proudly in the air just a second ago now feeling as heavy as a bag of sand.

“I don’t even know why I came here,” Jungkook sighed letting out a deep breath. “I’m leaving.”

Let him leave.

Please just let him leave.

Your brain quietly begged you.

His hand was on the knob. Jungkook was almost gone. Just let him leave.

“Jungkook please,” You quietly called out. “Please don’t leave. I’m…. I’m- I’m sorry.”

For once when you looked at Jungkook he genuinely seemed to be in shock. Like even he was in disbelief of what he’d just heard. You couldn’t even believe it yourself. Out of all the things you should’ve said, had you really just apologized?

“Please-” He closed his eyes. “Don’t apologize…. why are you fucking apologizing? Shit-” Jungkook whispered running his hands over his face. “I…I can’t,”

“Jungkook please,”

“What do you want from me!” The dark hair boy whipped around. “Fuck…baby,” Jungkook swore again. “I didn’t mean to yell. Please don’t cry.”

You whispered a small okay, but the tears didn’t stop. Even as Jungkook moved forward his soft hands cupping your face as he gently tried to wipe the tears away, they didn’t stop. Just like last night when Jungkook touched you- you couldn’t help but lean further into him. Your body curled into him as he hesitantly wrapped his arms around you.

“What are you doing to me?” Jungkook mumbled. It was so quiet you weren’t even sure you were meant to hear it.

For the first time since the very first time, Jungkook was soft. His lips gently caressed yours as he guided you through the narrow hall and to your bedroom. As Jungkook laid you down you couldn’t help but cling to him. Your arms and legs wrapped tightly around his body as if you let go he would just disappear. You knew he was going to leave at some point- he always did- but for right now you wanted him as close as possible.

Imani be damned. Jungkook was yours and you were his.

At least for this moment.

“Take this off,” He tugged at your jacket. Without a second thought, you leaned forward sliding the jacket over your head before letting it fall to the floor. “My pretty girl,” Jungkook whispered sliding your bra off next. A low whine escaped you as Jungkook’s fingers ghosted across your skin.

“What do you want?”

“Anything,”

A light chuckle left Jungkook’s nose. In all honesty, it made you feel gross. The way the knowing smirk registered on his face as he thought about your words. Even though you hadn’t technically said it Jungkook knew what you meant. He knew exactly what he was doing and that alone should’ve made you push him off you.

But you didn’t. Instead, you begged.

He just shushed you. “You don’t want me to rush right?” You quickly shook your head. “I know you don’t want me to.”

With that, Jungkook went back to what he was doing. Tracing his fingers along while you lay there taking whatever he gave you. Piece by piece, Jungkook took his time removing the remainder of your clothes.

“I haven’t even done anything and you're so fucking wet,” Jungkook reached down spreading your lips apart. “You’d take anything I gave you. Do anything I say. Wouldn’t you?” You gave a shameful nod. Jungkook just smiled smugly to himself.

You let out a breath of relief as Jungkook finally leaned down pressing long kisses against your body. The dark-haired boy not stopping until he was right in front of the place you needed him most.

The loud blaring of Jungkook’s phone ringing pulled the two of you from the moment. You couldn’t see who was calling but for some reason, you already knew.

“Hi baby,” Jungkook said sweetly into the phone confirming your suspicion. The lust-filled fog you’d briefly felt immediately lifted and now all that was left was disgust. What the hell were you doing?

“No no-” He laughed. “Well, I’m glad you enjoyed yourself. I’m sorry I couldn’t come with you. Yeah no-” Jungkook let out a deep breath. “I’m still not feeling to well.” A soft whimper escaped your lips as Jungkook took his thumb resting it on your clit as he rubbed against the small button in circular motions.

Pouting his lips out, Jungkook silently shushed you. “No babe don’t worry about it. I’m sure I’ll be fine tomorrow. M’just gonna lay down and go to sleep.” He pushed a finger in making you gasp.

“Yeah, I know.” Jungkook hummed. “I love you too,”

If Jungkook hadn’t hung up the phone so quickly the sound of you bursting into tears would’ve definitely exposed the five different lies he’d just told. Never once in all your years had you experienced two totally different emotions at once.

“Y/n- baby,” Jungkook cooed softly as he leaned down pressing a kiss to your forehead.

You sucked in a shaky breath, arms wrapping around your body. “What the fuck-” You heaved. It felt like you were about to throw up. “Oh my god… what am I do- you-you have a girlfriend.”

“But I’m here with you. Just let me do this.” Jungkook begged. He sounded so sincere. You could feel yourself falling back under. “Just one last time. You- you drive me crazy.”

It was so sad how that was all it took for Jungkook to have you back under his spell. A faint smile filled his lips as he pushed back so he could stand up and pull down his pants. The tip of his cock was dark red and leaking with anticipation.

You began to roll over onto your stomach but a hand resting on your hip stopped you. “I wanna see you,” Your heart swelled.

Despite the position change, Jungkook was still as rough as he usually was. His fingers dug harshly into your throat as he fucked you. As much as you didn’t want to think about it you couldn’t stop yourself from wondering if this was how he treated Imani. The very nature in how he spoke to her was so different that you couldn’t imagine it to be true. Jungkook was probably so gentle with her, he took his time making her feel special with every touch while with you Jungkook just fucked you like some whore.

And that’s all you were. At least to him.

That still didn’t stop you from grasping at his arm as you asked for more.

“Keep your eyes on me,” Jungkook demanded. “Wanna see you. Need shit-” He let out a deep groan. “Need to see you.”

You nodded your head in compliance but with the way Jungkook pushed into you, it was too hard to keep your word. “ah- Kook…please- fuck,” The way he looked on top of you was so gorgeous. His hair hung in his face as his eyebrows twisted in determination.

“I know baby,” Jungkook gasped as he twisted your left nipple between the balls of his fingers. “You’re so good- doing so fucking good.” You let out a loud whine. “What is it, baby?”

“Muh-more. Please- more,”

“Words baby,”

You weren’t even sure what you meant. Whether you meant it literally, figuratively, or both. Probably both. All you wanted was Jungkook.

Instead of saying anything else you just pulled him closer until his body was lying flat against yours. When Jungkook pulled away you almost felt yourself about to cry, rejection flooding your body, but within seconds he hushed you pulling your legs onto his shoulders before he leaned down pressing himself against you again.

“No marks,” He muttered sternly. You hadn’t even realized you’d begun. Jungkook didn’t follow his own direction though. His lips sucking eagerly on your neck as he continued to fuck you open.

You couldn’t help the tears rolling down your face. You just wanted this all the time. Wanted Jungkook all the time.

“Please, please”

“My pretty baby gonna cum?” You bounced your head eagerly. “Me too- mmm… you feel so fucking good.” You gasped loudly clenching tightly around him. “That’s right baby- give it to me.”

You’re sure the neighbor can hear you as you scream out in pleasure from the band in your stomach snapping. Eyes rolling to the back of your head as nothing but the sound of static and color white filled your brain.

Jungkook came with a loud groan. His body stuttering against yours as his warm cum painted your walls creamy white. Even as Jungkook fell to the side rolling onto his back you didn’t let him go. Your arms wrapped around his stomach as if he would disappear if you let him go for just a second.

Because he would. Undoubtedly Jungkook was going to leave you and there was nothing you could do about it.

He was going to walk out of here and go back to Imani as if nothing between the two of you had ever existed. Just the thought of him running his hands along her deep brown skin is enough to make you want to puke.

And as much as you wanted to hate her you couldn’t. You were the one in the wrong. Maybe you didn’t know about her at first but now you did, and you’d still slept with Jungkook.

“Don’t cry. Please don’t cry.”

“I hate you. I hate you so much.” You sobbed.

“I know,” Jungkook took a long pause. “I hate me too.”

When you woke up the next morning just like you expected your room was empty. The only trace of Jungkook even being here is the scattered marks along your jaw.

When you picked up your phone it’s still where you left it last night.

On Imani’s Instagram page.

You don’t know why you did what you did next.

You click the little blue button in the top left corner.

⤑ A/N: I'm sorry guys I know a lot of you who liked the first story wanted a part two where jk was redeemed but tbh I just could not think of a storyline for that. even when this one-shot was originally jikook I had always imagined that if there was a pt 2 in the next fic jk would turn out to have had a significant other the whole time. also, I like angst sue me :p

#bts smut #bts x black reader #bts fanfic #jungkook smut #jungkook drabble #bts jungkook #jungkook x black reader #jungkook x reader #jungkook angst #btshoneyhive

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danikamariewrites · 6 months

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Trapped

Lucien x reader

A/n: part 2 to Fox Hunter! I was so happy so many people liked this fic and I hope you like part 2. I love Elain so breaking her heart killed me but it had to happen sadly.

Warnings: dark!reader, manipulation, angst

Three months. It took three months for my brother to mess things up. It’s my own fault, really. I did not take into account the amount of time he had spent with Gwyn. When the bond snapped for them Azriel left Elain. It’s been weeks now. Azriel and Gwyn have been in the cabin in the mountains since. Elain wont even come out of her room.

Today Feyre had had enough. A loud knock sounded on the front door, I open it to find a disheveled Feyre. She has bags under her eyes, her hair pulled up in a ponytail to hide the knots forming in her sandy locks. Her shoulders are slumped in defeat as she shuffles inside. I felt bad for her. She shouldn’t have to be dealing with Elain’s mess of a life, she had already done so much for her sisters.

I hold my arms out to pull her into a comforting hug. Feyre slumps against me as a sob shakes her body. “I can’t take it y/n. I know she’s hurting but this is irrational.” I rub her back slowly, my eyes fluttering shut as I prepare myself for what Feyre is about to ask me. “Elain won’t speak to me or Nesta anymore. Nesta tried today but she asked for you. Will you please talk to her?”

Resting my hands on her shoulders I pull away from Feyre. “Yes, anything to help Elain. She’s my friend and I hate seeing her in pain like this.”

When I arrive at the River House later that day I spot Lucien and Cassian speaking in hushed tones by the staircase. As I pass them I send Lucien a wink and a small smile that he returns. Making my way up the stairs I can smell the salt of Elain’s tears. Taking a deep breath I mentally prepare myself to step into the role of friend.

I knock on the door and enter without her permission. “Elain,” my voice comes out sweet and caring. I just want the girl to stop crying. She sniffled and stood from her bed. Elain pulled herself up to her full height, holding her chin up high. A scowl graces her lips as she stares daggers at me. “Elain?” I ask tentatively.

“I asked for Lucien. I wanted to take it all back but then Nesta told me he was with you. Your scents were mixed.” Elain was trembling at this point. “You did this. You wanted Lucien and you made me break the bond with him!” She was screaming at this point. I knew my look of shock was genuine by Elain’s dark laugh. “Oh. My. Gods. I knew it! You did this to me on purpose!”

“I told you to follow your heart! Never once did I tell you to break the bond.” Elain started screaming bloody murder. She started pacing like a mad woman, gripping at the roots of her hair. Thundering footsteps rush up the stairs. Before I could say anything to claim my innocence Rhys, Feyre, Cassian, and Nesta burst through the door. “What’s going on?” Rhys yells.

Elain stops her pacing pointing a threatening finger at me. “Y/n did this to me! She took Lucien from me! Made me break the bond!” I turn to my family with a worried gaze. “I didn’t…I told her to do what was right I never meant for this.” Nesta rushed past me into Elain’s bathroom. Elain continues rambling until Nesta comes back with a small vile. Uncorking it, she forces the liquid down Elain’s throat.

The girl went limp in her sister’s arms. Slurring her words until her eyes flutter shut and she’s completely unconscious. Cassian takes Elain from Nesta to lay her on the bed. Rhys takes my hands, giving me a sympathetic smile. “I didn’t know this would happen,” I whisper out. Again, forcing tears to line my eyes. “Elain is my friend I’d never do this.”

“I know sister. Mating bonds are fragile things. The breaking of it with Lucien and Azriel leaving with Gwyn must be taking its toll on her emotionally.” Rhys said somberly. “I think it’s best we stay away for a while.” Rhys agreed and granted Lucien and I a leave of absence.

I rush back downstairs, a new spring in my step at the thought of spending time alone with Lucien away from the Night Court. As I stepped into the sitting room Lucien stood from the couch. “How is she?” Concern etched on his beautiful face. I hold his face in my hands slowly rubbing circles with my thumbs on his cheeks. I give my love a sympathetic frown. “Not well. I think everything is finally taking its toll on her, poor thing. It hurts to see her like this.” Lucien pulls me into a warm embrace. I rest my head against his strong chest, his steady heartbeat soothing my anxiety about this whole situation.

At least none of them believe Elain. Why would my brothers question me after five hundred years of love and loyalty. And they truly believe the poor girl is psychotic. Helping me evade doubt.

“Rhysand is letting us take a leave of absence. We could use a break for a while.” I lean away from Luc to gage his reaction. He flashes me that dazzling smile that makes my knees go weak. “I’d love that.” I pull him down to meet my lips in a sweet kiss. Breaking apart he rests his forehead against mine. “How about we go to Day for a while? My father asked me to visit, now is the perfect time.”

I smile at the thought of us in Day Court fashion. Walking around the palace, visiting the many libraries, and relaxing by the beaches. Peace. We’d have peace in Day, a chance to get lost in each other. “That sounds perfect.”

Lucien gives me one last kiss before heading to his office to write to Helion. I returned to the Town House to pack our bags as I daydream about a life for us in Day.

tagging: @thelov3lybookworm

#acotar #acotar fanfiction #acotar reader fic #acotar reader imagine #acotar imagine #lucien vandaddy #lucien x you #lucien x reader #lucien acotar #lucien vanserra #lucien vanserra x reader #lucien vanserra x you #Lucien vanserra acotar #lucien fic #Lucien fanfic

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allexina · 2 months

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Content warnings: reader is female and uses she/her pronouns, internalized misogyny, physical violence, abuse, manipulation, gaslighting, mentions of starvation, and child neglect.

Johnny Cade x Female! Reader - Sinners

Summary: You were stuck in a very religious household and were raised to believe that bad things would happen if you didn’t follow the rules set for you perfectly. When you meet Johnny Cade, an innocent boy who just wants what’s best for you, he shows you what affection and love is when given in a healthy dosage and not used in a detrimental way. When you finally open up to him about your family, Johnny decides he wants to get you out before something bad happens to you.

Author’s note: I’m so sorry that this took so long!! I’ve been experimenting and rewriting this to fix everything. I’ve also been going back and forth between multiple of my stories so I don’t burn myself out! I do genuinely wonder what churches and all were like back then. I know there was a LOT of cults back then which was what originally inspired this. I will be coming back to proofread this/fix any dialogue that doesn’t make much sense for Johnny. Also, please give constructive criticism!:)

Word count: 5.2K+

You were on your knees, murmuring a quick prayer. You didn’t want to be outcasted or damned for missing even one prayer and that was something that was beat into you as a child. You kept your hands clasped tightly together as you heard snickering coming from behind you.

You ignored it, knowing it was those boys that had come in randomly during the sermon. You stopped yourself from thinking anything bad about the people laughing. God told you that it wasn’t your place to judge and you trusted him. You wouldn’t judge the boys no matter how many cruel words they spoke.

You felt the tears before they even started to try and fall. You had stood up from the altar and wiped the tears away quickly, hoping no one saw you. The fear of being seen crying wasn’t too strong as everyone already called you overly sensitive so it didn’t matter much if they saw you crying. You went to sit back beside your family, who were all smiling at you as if you had done some good deed by praying.

In your eyes, that was the least of your good deeds. Why didn’t any of the other times get noticed? It wasn’t like it mattered that they didn’t because you weren’t supposed to be praised for doing the bare minimum but it was still upsetting.

A woman sitting beside you smiled down at you and nodded with no actual reason. Well, you thought she was saying hello without speaking. That’s how the people in your class said hello without ever speaking. You found it entertaining but never acted how they did because it was unladylike in every way.

You smiled at the woman and looked back to the preacher who was getting louder by the second. You crossed your arms as you licked your dry lips.

You would do anything to get out of the church but God wouldn’t appreciate you hating his love the way you were. You closed your eyes and looked down towards the ground as you began rapidly praying. Begging for forgiveness that you knew wouldn’t come easily, you felt your heart release the heaviness of your sins. You wouldn’t tell a soul of your true sins. The ones that keep you up late into the night; the ones that make you miss the days you would smoke cigarettes to calm yourself.

You heard the sermon slowly come to an end and you stood up without much thought as you walked into the aisle. Your parents followed you as you walked out of the church without speaking to anyone. Your mom followed you as she let out a sigh. “Your father needs to speak with the pastor so he said we could head on home.” She smiled as she placed a hand on your shoulder. “I don’t know about you, but I’m starving!” She started leading you away from the church as you looked over your shoulder. A group of teenage boys had walked out of the building with one specifically watching you walk away.

Your eyes looked towards a random tree after making eye contact with the adorable boy. You thought he was handsome but you felt a certain disgust for feeling that. You were going to marry a man of your father’s choice. After all, he knew what men were like and would choose based on which man could provide for you and your future family.

Your mom pressed a kiss to your forehead as she held you tightly against her. “Do you want to start exercising more?” Your mom suddenly questioned aloud as she ran a hand through your hair. “I think we should go on more walks and get out of the house more. You’re homeschooled and have nothing else to do and I usually have our home cleaned with food on the table long before it’s needed.” She rambled on and on as you stopped.

Your house was in front of the two of you as you grabbed your mom’s hand from your shoulder and began leading her up the concrete pathway that paved the path you needed to take.

Your stomach growled angrily as you felt hunger pains spread throughout your stomach. When was the last time you ate? You couldn’t remember as you felt you still didn’t deserve to eat. You took a moment to look around your house. Your mom was trying to redecorate as much as possible for Easter. You were feeling disappointment that winter had almost ended and it was soon to be summer.

You enjoyed bundling up in the warmest of clothes while also having reason to light a fire in the fireplace. You felt your face flush as you looked in the mirror that was hung in the living room and noticed that the strap of your bra had slipped down your shoulder. Your mom watched as you pulled it up with a struggle.

“You know, you don’t have to panic when it’s just me. I have breasts, too.” You looked at her with the widest of eyes she’d or anyone had ever seen on you.

“Mom! It’s immodest to ever allow anyone to see anything that only a husband should see!” You snapped as you ran up to your room in fear of being seen as a… you couldn’t bring yourself to think the word.

You collapsed on your bed as sobs filled the empty space beside you. You were ashamed, hurt, sad. You couldn’t understand the emotions that flowed endlessly through your body.

You grabbed the comforter from the end of your bed and brought it up closer to you as you flipped and turned every which way to get comfortable. You grabbed the stuffed animal that laid beside you and hugged it close to you. You were tired and you didn’t want to be involved with anything else for that day. You had gone to church and you had prayed to God to get you out.

You closed your eyes as you slowly drifted off to sleep.

You grabbed the piece of toast off of your plate and licked your lips at the buttery taste. You were going to the library soon to find the second to the last book in a fantasy series that you had picked up.

You grabbed your purse and started to walk out of your house with a tired sigh leaving you. You wanted more sleep but you also wanted more time to yourself. Your dad had come home with another man. He told you the man was a pastor from a nearby church that wanted to talk about God with your family.

You walked down the broken sidewalk with a frown plastered on your family. You were nervous to be out in public without one of your parents with you as they told you a lot of bad people liked to prey on young girls such as yourself. It made you nervous to even look out the window some days with the things they told you.

You sped up as the wind blew a little harder against you. You were wearing a long dress that covered everything including your ankles while also covering your arms and shoulders. The dress was wildly blowing with the wind and for a good while, you thought you were going to fly away with the fallen leaves on the ground.

The buildings around you had gotten more abundant as you seen the library in the distance. You heard that same loud laughing that you heard whilst in the church which made you do a double take at the group of boys walking down the sidewalk.

Your eyes met with that of the boy who had puppy eyes. He was attractive but you forced yourself to look away from him as it was disgusting for you to feel attracted in any way to anyone until you were married. You crossed your arms and covered your breasts as you knew that your body was created to be distracting for men. You never wanted to tempt someone.

You happily pulled open the glass door to the library and walked in, feeling a sense of safety when you heard the door shut loudly behind you. You never enjoyed entering buildings. It was… terrifying for you.

You needed to find another book that would keep your thoughts solely on yourself and the characters. Your Bible had kept you pretty focused on living your life based on God but you couldn’t continue to read the same sentences over and over while pretending to completely understand the meaning.

Your eyes scanned the dozens of thick books that were laying with a layer of dust covering them. You grabbed one that had a slightly darker cover than the rest, reading the title before flipping the book over to read the back.

You heard the library door open and close loudly. You looked towards the noise and almost let out a gasp once you saw the boy with the puppy eyes. He was making eye contact with you.

You looked back down at the book that you were holding so tightly that your knuckles were white.

You watched as the boy approached you after a second, finally deciding to speak after a moment. “Uh… hey. I’m Johnny.” The boy finally sent you a shy little smile and you looked down.

“I’m R/n.” You stuck your hand out and the two of you shook hands. You were honestly shocked that he had even followed you into the library to talk to you. You felt your cheeks flush at the thought of him finding you so pretty that he wanted to talk to you.

“I saw you the other day at church and now you’re here…” Johnny’s voice sent something throughout you as he moved a hand to rub the back of his neck.

“Oh, well I appreciate you approaching me but I only date to marry. If that is why you approached me.” You lied through your teeth and it made you feel bad. You weren’t allowed to date. Your parents only wanted you to marry a nice man who would do whatever so long as it meant that you were out of their house by eighteen.

“Oh…?” Johnny sounded confused as he looked up at you. You were wearing your heels and were standing only a few inches taller than he was.

“I don’t mind! Really. I- can we just be friends?” Johnny felt his stomach continue to wrap itself in loops as he broke eye contact and began staring uncomfortably at the ground.

“Yes. I would like that.” You gripped the book in your hand as you began walking to the librarian’s desk. She took your book from your hand and before you knew it, the book was slid across the desk back to you.

Johnny continued walking with you even when his friends started calling him over. You looked at Johnny with the smallest of smiles, “you can go hang out with them, if you want. My parents are strict and wouldn’t appreciate me being around a boy without them.” Your words confused Johnny as he knew parents could be protective but why were yours wanting to be around for every little moment? You were almost an adult woman and you still heavily relied on your family which, don’t get Johnny wrong, wasn’t a bad thing but it also wasn’t healthy.

“Okay. When can I see you again?” Johnny wanted to ask you out on a date but knew you’d reject him given the opportunity which you had.

“Well, I do want to go shopping soon so if you want to come then?” You tilted your head to the left slightly, eyes staring back at Johnny’s with a certain glint in them.

“Yeah, that works.” Johnny murmured as he stared at you as if you had hung the stars in the sky.

“Well, meet me at the Summit tomorrow at twelve.” You smiled as Johnny nodded before he began walking back towards his friends.

You stared helplessly after him, feeling as if you were doing the wrong thing by allowing him to walk off like that.

You let out a sign and continued your adventure home.

“R/n? Are you done?” Your father peeked into your room to ask if you were done reading the Bible. You felt that you were as you had memorized almost every verse you were given. It was mind boggling how you could remember such complex things but forgot simple things such as how to cook a chicken breast. Maybe that’s why your parents cared so much about finding you a husband. You were still excited about the prospects of receiving love and giving it back to someone but that excitement had died down a lot since you’d seen Johnny that day at the library.

“Yes, sir.” You responded as you looked out the window. Rain was clinging to the glass as if it was its life force. You found it fascinating how the drops would hit the window and stick only for them to slowly slide down. It was a cycle that was endless and so fun to watch. Your father left you alone as you heard the thumping of his shoes on the stairs. You tried to ignore the feeling of random sadness that you had started to feel. New emotions were appearing now that you had the slightest taste of freedom.

You were excited, nervous, sad, happy, etc. all because of a boy that you would never ever get to be with in any capacity. You looked at your clock on the wall and stood up, deciding it would be better for you to go get a snack and then take a short cat nap after just to get some of your energy back.

You let out a sigh as you walked down the stairs and came face-to-chest with your father.

“What’s wrong, R/n?” He lifted a hand up only for you to walk past him quickly. You were nervous. You didn’t want to speak to your father as he would only make those feelings intensify. You sat down at the kitchen table with a frown appearing on your features.

Your mom looked at you with the smallest of smiles playing at her lips. Your plate was already made and placed down in front of you. You didn’t immediately start to eat as your father came into the kitchen and sat down at the head of the table. Your eyes watched his every move, a certain anger filling you as you watched your parents turn to each other and began a conversation.

Why did they get to do whatever they wanted, even when it counted as a sin, yet when you do something, you're deemed a demon. A sinner who will never see the pearly gates of heaven. Your mouth stayed sealed as you felt the anger dissipate into thin air as guilt overtook every other emotion. Those were your parents. They never sinned even when you believed they did because you were uneducated and you didn’t understand the Bible as much as they did.

“I met a boy today.” You finally spoke, deciding to tell your parents the truth. God would want you to tell them the full, honest truth.

Your mom leaned forward with a smile on her face, “oh, tell me about him! Is he a God fearing man? Does he understand that you aren’t willing to be intimate until marriage? What about the church's rules? Does he know them?” Your stomach twisted at your mom’s words. You closed your eyes before starting to slowly answer all of her questions.

“He is. He goes to church. I did tell him that and he was okay with it. I haven’t mentioned the rules yet.” You whispered out as you sat up a bit straighter.

Your mom had a look of excitement on her face as she started talking while your father leaned back in his chair. “You’ll have to speak with brother David.” You hated calling everyone your brother and sister. It was unfair and disgusting when people began marrying each other within the church. You thought you were all brothers and sisters. You shuddered but nodded finally.

“Okay, but I never said that I wanted to be with him.” You responded as you picked your fork up and scooped some of the mashed potatoes up onto your fork. They were creamy and perfect. You continued shoveling the food into your mouth while your mom talked to your father.

“Our daughter is growing up. Next thing we know, she’s going to be in the hospital delivering our first grandchild.” Your stomach cramped with the pain of imaginary childbirth. That pain soon drifted to your lower body as you crossed your legs with the pain finally disappearing as you stopped thinking about it.

You would hold off on giving birth for as long as you possibly could.

“She won’t be doing anything until she speaks to brother David.” Your father reiterated what he had said before and you leaned back into your chair. Well, you at least had your mom’s permission to find a lover. You also remembered the numerous conversations where he had told you that he would choose a husband for you, because you weren’t smart enough to pick a good man.

You finished the food on your plate and stood up from the table as you decided you would wash your own plate. You didn’t want to stay at the dinner table any longer than you already had. That was a waste of time in your opinion.

You let out a sigh and walked to the kitchen, scraping the leftover food off of your plate before setting the plate and fork on the countertop and turning the sink on. You loved playing within the soapy bubbles that always spread rapidly once the soap was added. It smelt good and made you feel good. It made you feel clean.

You grabbed the sponge off of the holder that kept it out of the sink. You added a little soap to it before setting the plate into the sink and washing it. By the time you were finished, you had wanted to go to sleep. You grabbed the towel that you and your mom normally used to dry the dishes and quickly wiped the water off.

You opened the cabinet and you slid the plate into its normal place. “Hey, R/n? How much do you want for your allowance?” Your mom yelled to you and you wiped your hands onto your floral dress as you quickly started to walk towards your mom. Your heels clicked on the floor of your home as you caught sight of your parents who were still sitting in the kitchen.

“I don’t mind but I do really want that (favorite colored) dress that has (favorite design) on it.” You looked at your mom before your father pulled his wallet out and pulled a few dollars out. It was more than enough for you to buy the dress.

“Thank you, father.” You wrapped your arms around your father excitedly. You couldn’t remember a time where you felt so happy about receiving money. Usually, you would argue some and hope that they kept whatever money it was that they were trying to give. When it came to the man who had a helping hand in your creation, you didn’t care much. You enjoyed taking money from him and reminding him of your existence otherwise, he wouldn’t remember you past being at church.

You started making your way back to your room, hoping that you could meet that Johnny boy again. Hopefully he would be willing to meet up with you again so you could talk further than you anxiously speaking words that shouldn’t have ever been spoken in the same sentence. You wished you wouldn’t have lied and told him that you date to marry.

You needed human interaction to survive. You loved being with some of your close friends while doing anything at all. You couldn’t care less what the interaction you had was so long as you weren’t alone.

You started walking back up onto the stairs as you thought about how you could get into contact with Johnny once more. You made it to the top of the stairs and your eyes landed on the cross that hung above the staircase. You smiled as you murmured the lightest of prayers, and went back up to your room to pick an outfit out for your day out tomorrow. You wanted to impress Johnny and make him see you in a light that made you seem almost innocent. Men only wanted innocent and modest women.

You picked out a dress that had long sleeves and went down to the floor. You would wear your heels and it would make the dress reach close to your ankles. You set the dress onto the chair in the corner of your room.

You changed into a more comfortable outside before brushing your teeth and hair.

Soon after, you were in your bed and whispering prayers to God, hoping he would bless you with the prospects of love.

You were up and eating breakfast with your stomach twisting into knots. Your mom didn’t mention the slight shake of your hands and she didn’t mention how you were dressed up with makeup and all. She didn’t want him to realize and keep you home instead of letting you go out with your friend.

“Thank you for the money.” You grabbed the orange juice and took a sip from it as your mom looked at you with a smile. Your father had a slight smile but he it didn’t reach his eyes.

You were quick to leave your house, knowing you would be an hour or so early for whatever was going to happen with Johnny. You wiped your hands onto your dress and started walking slowly. You could take the time to admire your surroundings instead of trying to book it to meet up with Johnny.

He would probably be late anyways as all of the men you knew were rarely on time without a woman forcing them to get up and out of the door before a specific time. You meant no harm to Johnny but he didn’t seem like the kind of man to have someone doing that for him.

More often than not, he had dirt on his face and always seemed dirty. You would fix that, of course. You made sure to pack a small jar of water along with a handkerchief to make sure that he would get clean.

You looked around at the trees with a small smile on your face. Animals were casually running around and happily avoiding you as if their lives depended on it. Though, in hindsight, you were technically a danger to the animals mostly because humans killed them so often.

You noticed the Summit was quickly approaching within your line of vision and you quickened your pace so you could sit somewhere and wait for Johnny.

You entered the building and a shocked expression overtook your features as you tilted your head. Johnny was sitting on one of the benches and was pulling at something in his pocket. “Johnny?” You smiled as you realized he was early without you even having to ask him.

Johnny stood up and held a hand out for you as you gave him a grin. “I didn’t want to be late so I left a little earlier…” Johnny’s voice held that southern accent that made you smile. You had lived in the south your entire life but for majority of it, you lived in Utah so your accents were slightly different.

“That’s why I came early, too. Well, come on! We need to get into the shops before everyone else gets in.” You noticed the dirt had been wiped away but the grease in his hair was prevalent still.

You didn’t mind though as the two of you started walking together. “I… I’m sorry if I came off as overbearing last time. I never meant to come off like that.” You whispered out as you walked a little quicker just in case he didn’t react well to your words.

“You didn’t. I just wasn’t ready for it.” Johnny caught up with you and gave you the shyest smile you had ever seen.

“Oh… okay.” You pulled open the glass door, a smile present on your face as you walked into the building. You held the door open for Johnny with a grin on your face. You seen him pause for a moment before he walked into the store you wanted to go in. His eyes shifted from dress to dress without much thought behind his eyes.

“Oh, they still have it!” You smiled as you rushed to grab the dress that you originally wanted. You held the dress up and gave Johnny the most innocent smile he had ever seen in his life.

You skimmed through the sizes and chose yours, holding the dress under your arm as you waved an employee down. “Hi! I was wondering if you could let me into one of the dressing rooms?” You asked with a shy smile on your face.

The woman immediately nodded as the two of you began walking towards the dressing rooms. You peaked over your shoulder and saw Johnny was slowly following too. You would need to make sure he didn’t feel awkward after showing him the dress.

“My sister loves this dress. She actually cut the sleeves off because she thought it looked cuter and it really does!” The employee smiled at you and your eyes sparkled.

“Oh, that’s wonderful! I may have to do that before the summer months hit.” You laughed as the woman opened the dressing room door. She closed it after you and you looked at yourself in the mirror.

You were gorgeous.

You slipped out of the dress you were in and slid into the other dress with a smile on your face. The dress was beautiful on you and really made you look ten times better than you ever thought you would look. You always assumed the very worst of anything especially when it came to clothes.

You opened the door of the dressing room and gave Johnny a small smile as you showed him your dress. “I think it looks pretty on me. What about you?” You asked softly as you turned slightly to show him the back of the dress even though it was the same as the other countless dresses you had.

“It looks very beautiful on you.” Johnny gave you a small, breathless smile as he looked you up and down. You walked over to him and wrapped your arms around his shoulders, hugging him as you decided you wanted to give him physical affection.

It wasn’t unnatural for you to want to give people hugs as that was your love language. You slowly let go of the man and went back into the dressing room with a smile on your face. You kissed Johnny’s cheek with the softest smile on your face. You let go of Johnny completely and backed away with your lipstick stains stuck on Johnny’s face.

You walked back into the dressing room and changed back into your other dress as you quickly wanted to make it back to Johnny on the other side of the door. “Hey, Johnny? Can you come in here?” You weren’t going to be undressed in front of Johnny as you had a shirt underneath the dress because you thought of every situation, including having Johnny help you.

Johnny slowly opened the door of the dressing room and came in before closing it with his foot. “What do you need help with?” Johnny asked quietly as he kept his eyes to the ground.

“Can you zip the dress up?” You turned around and smiled as you felt his hand make contact with the shirt on your back. You heard and felt the zipper get pulled up.

You turned around and you both exited the dressing room only for you to see one of your friends from the church standing in line. You grabbed Johnny’s hand and quickly scampered away from the dressing room so she wouldn’t tell your parents that the two of you were alone in the dressing room together.

You let go of Johnny’s hand and you both stood together in the line to pay. Now, you only wanted to get out of the store and the Summit in fear of your parents finding out that you were with a boy. Your parents knew that you had gone out with a man but they didn’t know who it was and you wanted to keep it that way. You didn’t want them to unnecessarily judge him for being less fortunate than your family.

“I was thinking that we could get something to eat afterwards?” You looked at Johnny with the biggest smile on your face.

“Yeah, if that’s what you want.” Johnny mumbled out as he kept his stare at the floor. You were slightly upset that he was so shy but then again, it still made you feel happy/giddy to know that he even wanted to spend time with you, anyways.

“That is what I want and I’ll pay for anything you want.” You smiled as the cashier suddenly caught your attention. You set your dress down on the counter and paid before leaving with Johnny.

You wanted to go to one of the higher end diners that you knew of but Johnny didn’t seem comfortable with the idea so you let him choose a place. He settled on a place that was in a rougher spot in town but nothing the two of you couldn’t get through. You knew that you would get something that would be easy on the stomach so that when you got home, you would also be able to eat supper with your family.

Johnny was standing in front of you with the door to the diner held open. You smiled at him as you felt a yawn creeping up from the back of your throat. You were so tired but knew that you had gotten enough sleep so being tired didn’t make much sense. “Oh, I’m so excited. I’ve never been here before.” You made a comment before realizing that could be taken in a different way. How would the upper middle class/wealthy girl ever end up in the bad part of town with everyone else? She wouldn’t unless she was with someone who knew the bad part of town.

You sat down at a booth and Johnny followed before you started talking. You were rambling on and on. Johnny allowed you to do so and didn’t bother to add anything into the conversation besides the occasional “yeah” or “okay”. You sheepishly smiled at him after rambling and he finally spoke, “do you want something to eat?” Johnny didn’t have a lot of money and he never thought he’d be in a situation where he would need it to make a girl feel like he genuinely likes her.

“Yeah but I’ll pay! I have more than enough money for the both of us. If you want, I can slip the money to you so you don’t feel embarrassed.” You gave Johnny a genuine smile as you leaned back against the booth seat. You grabbed the money from within your purse and nodded at Johnny to grab it from under the table. You didn’t want others to shame him even more for “making” the girl pay.

You cared deeply about societal norms and everything that came with it but you also knew that you wanted to have a lover before you became old and barren. You didn’t want to lose your ability to have children before you even had a chance to have a lover.

You watched as Johnny took the money from you with a frown on his face. You grabbed two menus from the holder on the back of the table and handed one to him. “Oh, I want a salad.” You smiled at Johnny with your cheeks turning a light shade of red. You didn’t want him to see you as anything other than an attractive woman. Anything else would be considered unfair to you as you always worked and tried to present yourself as a respectable and honest young woman.

“I want a hamburger…” Johnny’s voice had gotten more confident and you were proud of that. It must’ve meant that he was comfortable around you.

You nodded at him before speaking, “oh, I enjoy hamburgers but I love myself a nice salad.” You looked down at your stomach and Johnny watched as you subconsciously sunk down into the booth at the sight of your own stomach. You forced the frown off of your face and looked back up at Johnny.

“You know, I would love to go to the library soon. If you’d like, you can come with me…” you were nervous. You had never asked a man to go on a second date with you. That was when the realization hit you that this most likely wasn’t a date and he considered the two of you only friends. You played with your fingers under the table and cursed yourself slightly as you understood that caused it.

You let out a sigh as your thoughts started making you second guess everything. You liked Johnny but you felt almost as if you were using him. You decided then that you wanted to spend more time with Johnny.

You finally end wrapped your arms around yourself. You smiled at Johnny to make him less worried. You had noticed how his face fell slightly when you wrapped your arms around yourself and you felt guilty for being selfish. Everything was so awkward now that the two of you were alone with one another.

Soon enough, a waitress had stopped by y’all’s table to take your orders and you both gave your orders before you looked back at Johnny. “I’m sorry if this is awkward. I’ve tried to make everything less awkward but I feel like I’ve made it worse.” You laughed quietly and apologized softly.

You never wanted to make him uncomfortable and you felt that you had. “You didn’t! You… come off as a little strong but that’s fine.” You heard Johnny speak up, this time louder than any time before.

You leaned back in the seat and let out a sigh, knowing that you were going to go home and cry.

You were laying in bed with tears rolling down your cheeks. Your parents knew that you were out with Johnny and they knew that he had come into the dressing room with you. You were forced into your room and told that you wouldn’t be allowed to eat for a week and after that, you wouldn’t be allowed to see Johnny again.

You were glad that you ate before you came home and you knew that your mom would slip you snacks through the door when your father wasn’t looking. You were ashamed as you knew that everything you done was wrong. You not only hurt your parents but you angered God.

You had turned your back on the only thing that loved you for you. You felt yourself choke back another sob as you stared at the ceiling with tears rolling down your face. You grabbed a pillow and covered your face as you got off your bed. Your father was yelling downstairs and you knew the way to get your punishment over quickly.

You opened the door to your room and began walking down the stairs, understand that you would be in plenty of pain by the time it was all over. You understood that you deserved what your father was going to do to you and you were terrified. You didn’t want to be hurt but you also understood that you had to be hurt in one way or another.

It was the only way to receive God’s forgiveness for your sins.

Your feet hit the bottom of the stairs and you walked into the living room, looking at your parents. Your mom’s eyes widened and she immediately told you to go back to your room. You were sobbing again and your mom tried to reach you only for your father to physically throw her onto the couch.

Your father grabbed you by your shoulder and began forcing you towards the basement. It would only take five minutes, right? That was the usual time it took for you to finish all the punishments. You were silent throughout the ordeal as you knew that nothing you said would do anything. He would tell you to shut your mouth and you’d be punished longer than you would had you just kept your mouth shut.

You were forced onto the ground on top of a tarp-like surface that would catch any liquids that would fall during the interaction that was about to take place.

You didn’t want to fight back much as you had once before and your nose had been broken for it. You were embarrassed to admit that you stopped fighting back after that. On top of that though, God wouldn’t want you to fight back. He would want you to take whatever was given to you with grace.

You heard everything before you felt the physical pain from what you assumed to be your father’s belt.

You were close to sobbing by the third hit but your reminded yourself that you needed food. You could take quite a few hits before your body gave out but to go without eating for a week, it wasn’t something you wanted to do.

Soon enough, your father had left the basement and left you on the ground with tears in your eyes. You would never do this to your future children. Not even in the name of God.

It was too painful for you to even breath that second so why would you ever do something so heinous to someone else especially when it hurt you. You let out a silent sob as you slowly lifted yourself off of the floor. You looked at the ground and noticed the dark liquid that had formed from what happened. You gritted your teeth and began walking up the stairs, tears welling in your eyes as you struggled to walk up the stairs.

You opened the basement door and let out a choked sound before you almost slipped. You groaned as you weakly made your way to your room.

You almost let out a yell as you saw Johnny sitting on your bed with his eyes widening the second he saw you. “What happened to you?” He stood up and you closed your door quickly and slid your dresser in front of it.

You almost gave out as you covered your mouth to silence your scream. You sat down on your bed and shut your eyes tightly. Johnny put a hand on your thigh and gently tapped it as he watched your face change from one to pain to one of fear. “This is a sin.” You hissed out between clenched teeth.

“It’s not. You’re not a sinner because I touch you.” Johnny wrapped his arms around you and you let out another choked sob as you began to take your clothes off in front of Johnny.

“Help me…” your voice cracked as you begged him for help. You didn’t want to be physically hurt anymore. You couldn’t do it. “My father done this because we were in the dressing room together.” Johnny watched as you finished taking off your dress. You had since taken off the shirt underneath and Johnny was both in awe and disgust at the wounds. He’d never seen wounds so deep in a woman.

Johnny got up and begin searching your room, finding tape and an old shirt that seemed dirty. Johnny ripped the shirt and began gently tapping your wounds with it. “I’ll get you out of here. I fuckin’ promise to get you out of here.” He gave you a look of pure anger as you let out a whimper when he hit one of the wounds just right.

“Why do you got tape?” You whispered out as you tried to focus on anything and everything other than the fact that the boy you just got beat over was holding tape and cleaning your wounds.

“It’s nothin’. What’s your favorite book?” Johnny asked as he finished up with whatever he was doing.

You were already talking, hoping that you could somehow forget about the pain that came from each and every touch on your back.

“Edgar Allan Poe is my favorite author and I can’t choose between all of his books but I’d say The Raven is the best of them all.” You whispered out through gritted teeth. You finally felt Johnny gently pull your shirt down. You heard someone walking up the stairs and you immediately pushed Johnny into your closet.

Someone tried to open your door but was abruptly stopped by the dresser in front of it. “R/n? Baby, are you okay?” Your mom’s voice came through the door but you looked down at the ground.

“You said you’d talk to him about the no food thing.” Your voice cracked as you moved to sit down on your bed. You were… tired. That wasn’t the exact word for what you were feeling but it was oddly similar to what you were feeling. You thought that you wouldn’t ever grow tired of living the life that you were given but you had. The bruises were always painful and he never said sorry for all the physical and mental/emotional pain he caused both you and your mom.

Your mom had no reason to stay with him and she had no reason to fear him. She came from a wealthy family which is how your family even managed to stay in such an expensive house. Your father, a bank teller, didn’t make much and wouldn’t have been able to afford the home you lived in without your grandpa.

Your mom walked away from your room, the quietest of sobs leaving your mom. You felt terrible and felt like you were being too harsh on your poor mom. Your father “disciplined” her as well though her punishments were usually worse than yours and if she ever stood up against him for you, he would beat her until she was near death.

Johnny wanted to say something, anything but he couldn’t physically bring himself to speak. It was an awful feeling for the two of you as you sat silently in your room. You finally looked over at Johnny with a weird look on your face. “How did you get into my room?” Your voice sounded rough around the edges, breaking with every other word.

“I climbed the tree?” Johnny looked at you with a small blush coating his cheeks. You looked out your window and looked at the tree, looking back over at Johnny right after.

“I… didn’t know that was possible.” You heard Johnny stop all movement and you decided that you wanted to get sleep but you didn’t want to be alone. “I know we don’t really know each other but can you stay for a bit? My father won’t bother me for a few days and my mom will come by tomorrow afternoon.” You whispered out as you looked over at Johnny. Your nerves were absolutely on fire as you waited for his answer.

“Yeah, I can.” Johnny got off the bed and turned your light off after you asked him to stay, seeing the tiredness in your eyes. You blindly laid down on your bed and reached to grab the blanket on your bed. You were far too tired to fight with anything or anyone. You just wanted to get a few hours of sleep without being interrupted.

“I’m going to go to sleep. You can stay up and do whatever just be a little quiet because my parents will try to come in if you make too much noise.” You closed your eyes as you silently mumbled a prayer. You couldn’t clasp your hands together or get down on your knees as the pain was far too intense for you to move much.

All the adrenaline you had had disappeared by the time you settled back down into your bedroom. Johnny paused in front of you and your bed with hesitation creeping up. He didn’t want to get in bed with you in fear of you pulling away from him.

You moved over slowly and patted the bed beside you, understanding his fear of not wanting to be in bed with you. You felt the bed dip as he got in beside you and you wrapped your arms around one of your pillows and brought it down to your stomach.

You curled around it and closed your eyes as tightly as you could. Your parents wouldn’t come back to your room well into the next day and you were okay with that as you knew your mom would most likely try to make things “right” by bribing you with food or something else she knew you would enjoy.

Your father would only give you a dirty look, making sure you knew he and the men at the church all knew of your sins. Your mom would never gossip because she said that was one of the easiest sins to commit. Your father, on the other hand, loved to tell the other men about how he punished you. You had heard him go into detail about it and it made you feel upset.

Your cheeks was stained with the tears you shed earlier. You were slightly embarrassed to admit that you still cried over the things that happened. You were always told that you would grow out of being sensitive but with every passing day and birthday, you realized you wouldn’t. You still cried over the smallest of things and you couldn’t control the tears once they started. You felt that it wasn’t the biggest issue that you could have and yet, everyone else felt the opposite. They treated you differently based solely on the fact that you were a tad bit more sensitive than they were.

Your blanket was rapidly warming up as you kept it pinned tightly around you, feeling only the slightest bit of guilt for Johnny when you felt his body release a small shake. “Are you cold? Get under here with me.” You moved over and held the blanket up for Johnny to get in with you. You didn’t want to wait for very long so when he moved slower than you wanted, you blindly reached a hand out and pulled him into your bed with you.

His body hit your bed with a thump and you smiled as you turned to face the wall. You didn’t want to bother him or make him feel uncomfortable so you pushed yourself against the wall with an almost silent hiss as your back made full contact with something. You turned onto your stomach and closed your eyes with your body relaxing. You weren’t tired, not really but you needed more sleep especially after what happened.

“I’ll get you out of here. I swear to it.” Johnny whispered out from behind you into the silence of your bedroom.

You laughed quietly as you shook your head. “You can’t and that’s okay. There’s nothing wrong with what’s happening. This is God’s plan.” You shifted and let your foot slip out from under the blanket that shielded you from the outside world.

“This ain’t God’s plan. Man, if God wanted you to be hurt, wouldn’t he just do it himself?” Johnny asked you with a frown on his face. You couldn’t see it but you knew he wasn’t happy with you or the situation.

“I don’t know. God has people on Earth and he uses them to punish.” You responded only for Johnny to wrap an arm around you. He knew he needed comfort after being beat by his folks and assumed you would need/want that same comfort. You never did want that comfort mostly because the only people in your house was the ones who caused the pain in the first place. On top of that, the likelihood of your father stepping off of his high horse and trying to comfort you was almost as likely as seeing a unicorn.

It just wasn’t possible. He believed he was above you and your emotions which, in God’s eyes, he was. You weren’t supposed to complain as that was wrong too. Everything you had been doing as of late was wrong and you were ashamed to admit that you had willingly done most of it.

You felt the arm that was around you tighten around you more as your body shook with the silent sobs that left you. You had been so strong up until that point and now you couldn’t be strong. You were weak and would never live up to the person your parents seen when they looked at you. You were absolutely disgusting.

You closed your eyes and felt yourself drift off into a dreamless sleep.

You were woken up by someone shaking you gently. “You need to get up.” It was Johnny. He was trying to get you up and out of bed. “Come on. Both your parents left and you needa get up. We gotta go.” Johnny finally picked you up off of your bed and put your feet onto the floor of your bedroom.

“Johnny, we can’t leave? They’re my family.” You whispered out as Johnny started putting your things into a small bag.

“My folks are like yours. They ain’t worth nothin’ if they’re hittin’ you.” Johnny looked at you and gestured around. You started putting clothes into the bag before zipping it up and letting Johnny force your dresser from its place in front of your door.

Johnny intertwined your hands together and led you downstairs where the two of you left the house that you were raised in. It was unnerving and really made you feel terrible.

** One Year Later **

You put the notepad into the pocket of your apron. You were waiting for Johnny to come in so he could walk you back to your shared apartment with him. “Hey, baby!” You heard his voice as the bell above the glass door rung, telling you that someone had come in.

“Hi, lovely.” You pressed a kiss onto his cheek as you waved for him to sit at the counter. You were proud of both yourself and your lover. You made it out of whatever hell you had started in. You’d gotten yourself a psychiatrist/psychologist which you couldn’t remember which one it was but you were getting the help that you desperately need.

“Your shift was good?” Johnny asked as you poured some beer into a glass cup. You were the only one running the diner and Johnny would pay and tip you for pouring him a cup. You didn’t need that tip from him as the two of you shared finances but if you didn’t somehow, you would appreciate it.

“It was fine. I seen a man who looked very similar to my father earlier. Thought he’d finally come back to hurt me.” You set the glass in front of him. You leaned over the counter and pressed a kiss to Johnny’s cheek. You were feeling slightly relieved at the thought of your past life. You loved your parents more than anything but with the help of Johnny and a professional, you realized that God never wanted your father to beat you mercilessly.

You watched as Johnny took a sip of his beer. “We can afford for you to go to more of those sessions.” Johnny didn’t know much about your mental situation but he tried the best he could.

“Yeah, I know. He says I’m doing good for now. Says I’ve come a long way.” You walked around the counter and sat beside Johnny, laying your head on his shoulder. Your eyes were on the clock placed on the wall as you shook the thoughts from your head. “When you finish drinking that, we can leave. I’m closing tonight.” You stood up and watched as Johnny finished off the last of the beer.

He handed you the glass and you were quick to wash it. You were excited to go home and lay in bed with Johnny. You had never thought that you would be excited to just lay beside someone but once you and Johnny started to live the peaceful life, you were excited by the small things. You were looking forward to the future. To the days where you would get to see your future children running around.

You finished up with the cleaning and you began locking the diner up. “Oh, I’m so excited! I can’t wait to lay down and go to sleep.” You groaned out as you put the keys into your pocket. You would give them to Maryann in the morning when she came in. For now, you’d focus on the small family you had made for yourself that consisted of a healthier lifestyle, without the abuse.

Even if said abuse would haunt you for the rest of your life, you were at the very least, happy with yourself and the life you and Johnny had created.

#the outsiders #the outsiders x reader #Johnny Cade x reader #x female reader #Johnny Cade x female reader #The outsiders x female reader #Johnny Cade #The outsiders fanfic #the outsiders au #horror au #potentially triggering #horror

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salemcantupdate · 9 months

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Baldurs Gate shipping and who I am actively in love with

SO, currently romancing Gale because Astarion rejected me, full one said “I don’t wanna have sex with you, UGH, EW, imagine.” But Gale is so cute??? I don’t get whenever I see hate for him, especially cause we had astral projection sex which was absolutely fantastic. Wyll kissed me but I said “haha nah Gale” and I think I accidentally romanced Karlach??? I don’t know. Oh I also hugged the Guardian love him.

Now for shipping

SHADOWHEART AND LAE’ZEL IS SO FUCKING REAL TO ME OH MY GOD THEY GOTTA GET DOWN RIGHT NOW

They ARE rivals to lovers

Wyll and Karlach… they’re best friends. I’m sorry but all the women look like absolutely lesbians to me and I love that for them

But Wyll is so sweet and so cute and I do adore him, he’s so fun, but I built him so badly haha. Anyways, he is a WHORE, he flirts with EVERYONE, SLUT BOY, and he needs a happy ending. Don’t know with who though. And Karlach needs a short woman to peg.

Astarion is 100% asexual and I love him cause he’s just like me frfr which means he needs to be with me and only me. But also genuinely I think Astarion can only be happy with a redeemed Durge??? Like I think that’s the best path for him. Two monsters learning to be good together… GAH ITS SO CUTE. Either way, he’d need to be with someone who isn’t overly horny

Also once again I absolutely adore Gale. Gale is so good and so loving and he also absolutely loves body worship like he is hozier he was on his knees and worshipping his Goddess Mystra, loving her and now HE CHOOSES YOU IN HIS ROMANCE. HE BDKDCJKWHCISJDKWJD. I love him, so who should he be with? He’s more on the basic side overall, easy to get approval from, but also extremely romantic and loving, and autistic just like me frfr. So… actually maybe Wyll??? Wyll has some self worth issues especially after going all devil and Wyll is also a romantic? But ehhh… I dunno, it just doesn’t feel right.

Anyways, Halsin. I love the daddy bear man like YES he is absolutely fantastic and I love him so so so so much I want him carnally. But also I can’t really see him with most people haha. Maybe Gale though, imagine the astral projection scene but then Halsin is a bear, that’d be hilarious. But nah, I honestly like Halsin/Astarion/Reformed Durge Throuple. Essentially, finishing Astarion’s personal quest before initiation with Halsin will ensure that Astarion doesn’t get any self doubt. They are all on different parts of their journey for improvement, both Halsin and Astarion have severe issues with self doubt along with sexual trauma, and all of them have a “beast” inside. Durge with the Urge, Astarion being a vampire, and Halsin with his difficult-to-control wild shape. Plus Halsin to me is one of the most respectful and consent-focused characters, which I think would work well with what Astarion needs.

Ok so I wanna ship Karlach with some cute bard girl or something, someone just as fun and nice as she is. And you know what? Wyll and Gale is starting to grow on me. They’re both characters who try to “woo” Tav before doing anything, Gale with the Weave and Wyll with his dance.

Imagine, Gale teaching Wyll the secrets of the weave, likely Wyll has never interacted with it properly as his magic comes from a devil. This could help unlock Wyll and on some level separate him from Mizora. Oh wow, both these men have been manipulated and abused by extremely powerful non-humanoid women. They’re both self sacrificing gits who want to be the hero, both sacrificed much for power. I think it would start when Mizora first appears in camp, maybe. Gale would go to comfort Wyll over the transformation, maybe even compliment his horns. During the night of celebration Gale would see Wyll by the beach and offer to show him something magical, aka the Weave scene. They make some jokes and Wyll mentions the dancing, Gale prods, and Wyll says maybe another time.

GAH

I FEEL LIKE A FUCKING GENIUS

Alright, so, summary

Lae’zel and Shadowheart

Karlach and cute girl (if Alfira survived Durge I’d choose her but oh well)

Durge, Astarion, and Halsin

Gale and Wyll

EDIT: This post is no longer accurate to my views or feelings on the matter! I will write another one eventually since I actually know the characters a lot better. This was legit written before I even got to act 2 and I barely did anything in act 1

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vesemirsexual · 8 months

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What is even more disappointing about how game!Ciri is written is that CDPR Can give us compelling and complex “ trauma and grief can cause you to repeat the cycle of violence” arcs for characters like Syanna and Lambert but apparently completely forgot what a huge part of Ciri’s character that is

the first time I played I thought she got amnesia as well because of how much of her fiery temper was toned down, and how her trauma is hardly mentioned ( and it's not like the characters in this game trauma are completely ignored it is talked about in some quests) I wanna see what she really would have done had she seen Emhyr again

I feel like game Ciri had two distinct groups they were aiming for: people who found Geralt even more appealing because of the fatherhood angle so they had to work his actual kid in AND hot girl fan service.

The thing is, if they gave her too much personality or depth, she wouldn’t have fit into these groups well and therefore people would’ve found her annoying and/or off-putting. People already do sometimes but not to the degree that they would’ve if they even BEGAN to touch on the absolute shitstorm that is Ciris psyche after everything.

Also realistically, they made the Witcher games centre about Geralt bc he appeals to their large majority male fan base: combatant, dark mysterious tragic past, ripped, attractive, fucks hot women, is a good guy while still also getting to do badass things and beat people up. If you look in depth at Witcher fans on different platforms when they talk about him, a lot of dudes are very much “oh my god he’s literally me”. Ciri could never be the focus because she wouldn’t appeal to that same group, and we know that every time a game is released people throw the weirdest bitch fits about female characters, especially main ones.

This is also why Ciri is made an attractive character, when realistically that tiny little facial scar they’ve given her is nothing, she’s spent her developmental years on the run/being attacked/under extreme stress so I honestly can’t imagine her being a tall skinny but also hourglass woman with one or two scars, and put her in a cropped shirt (such a bad choice it’s mildly hysterical).

I think Lambert and Syanna are also a really good example of how people handle angry traumatised characters too, because Lambert gets a lot more leeway than Syanna (and I say this as a big fan of both!) Like there are literally people out there and on this webbed site who say she is pure evil, one of the evilest people in the Witcher for being a fucked up mean trauma victim who hurt a Poor Little Meow Meow (Higher vampire with decades of life experience more than her, incredibly possessive, responded to emotional manipulation by violently attacking an entire city). Like Lambert literally brags about axii’ing a guy to shoot himself in the head with his own crossbow.

Ciri got done very dirty, but I see how and why it happened. Book Ciri deserves rights but unfortunately I think Games Ciri will always be how people perceive her, and therefore portray her in fic, art and other work predominantly (praying same doesn’t happen with TWN Ciri). We’ve been robbed of such a complex, angry young woman and I mourn it 🙏

Edit: I can’t even touch on the Emhyr thing because the fact she can reconcile with him is honestly mildly fucking horrific. Like even if they’ve removed the nasty ass incest factor, that man quite literally destroyed her entire world and was willing to do so further in order to get his way. The fact she can call him father in one ending is genuinely vomit inducing and so disrespectful to Ciri as a character (also the audacity to play down that Ciri literally sees Yen as her mama WHILE playing devils advocate for War McCrime is a whole choice).

#sorry I rambled!#but you’re right anon ur right #also this post has swinging at a hornets nest elements but I do not careeeeewwe #katie txt #asks

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dizzyhslightlyvoided · 7 months

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hm. I noticed a few commonalities between Aka Yakumo and Oil Fire (besides the "hornyposting which is also sillyposting and vice versa" element). The first is anxiety.

Tsukasa Kudamaki is constantly feeling anxious because she has no idea how to handle a stable and halfway-healthy relationship as equals, because she can't believe that Sanae is voluntarily giving her the companionship and shelter she wants and doesn't know if this goodwill will ever dry up, and of course because she lives with her girlfriend and her girlfriend's moms, who are Actual Gods and could make life nasty for Tsukasa if she displeases them enough that Sanae can't or won't stop them (especially while she's still in hiding from her bungled assassination-attempt on Reimu).

Aka, meanwhile, is constantly feeling somewhere between 5% and 30% of the "WHAT THE ACTUAL SHIT? WWWWHAT?" which the original Aya would feel if she saw us (or at least Yukari) posting about "the good little bird in journalism". She doesn't consciously know why, of course, or even really what she's feeling, but that's just how the bird who vaguely resembles Renko crumbles.

The second commonality is that it's all worth it, at least in their minds. Tsukasa genuinely is happy with Sanae, and her surprise at the fact that she can actually feel love is matched only by her surprise that the one she's fallen for is this dorky autistic Gundam fan in her thirties who's exactly stupid enough that she's immune to Tsukasa's manipulations. Sanae doesn't know how to fix Tsukasa, and Tsukasa doesn't know how to make Sanae worse; they just rub off on each other, in a small way.

And on the other side, one must imagine Aka Yakumo happy -- she was chosen because a tengu is the second-biggest-prize after a nine-tailed fox, in terms of making a beast-youkai into a shikigami, and she's good at what Yukari wants her to do, which means she gets all the praise from Lady Yukari that she's been programmed to deeply need, and she only occasionally screws up enough to get whacked umbrella-ways. ... Also because she was programmed to be happier now.

The third commonality is that both participants in each concept are pathetic -- one of them is pathetic as part of who she is (Sanae, Aka), and the other is being pathetic (Tsukasa is never not being pathetic but takes pains to define herself in literally any other way, and Yukari who is allowing herself to become so obsessed with a bird who looks vaguely like Renko that she makes her into a shikigami and gives her an actual "good little bird in journalism" award).

So we have two different varyingly-horny concepts about a failwoman and walking-disaster-woman, one of whom feels like she's on a knife's edge all the time and the other of whom is barely aware of how much of a disaster she is, finding Happiness (of a sort). I don't know what my point is here.

#touhou #aka yakumo #oil fire #tsukasa kudamaki #sanae kochiya #wlw #yukari yakumo #shikigami aya #aya shameimaru

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ludinusdaleth · 30 days

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all this talk about liliana being iredeemable has got me thinking about how fandom instantly forgave essek for all he did

the way i got this ask right as i was talking to my friend about almost this exact topic (is that you, kea, or are we all just thinking it)

heres the thing, i get how someone at a superficial level could justify seperating essek from others like himself; hes had among the most screentime. but, and i say this as someone who adores essek, that's.... really the only true leg up he has on others manipulated by ludinus/others against the gods, and it's very easy to notice the discrepancy. i genuinely do not think his story is somehow more valid or compelling than any other in similar shoes; most of them have an extremely close connection to a main character or are one, and they all had or have a chance at hope, to me. i once saw a post that snarked at anyone who would dare to say essek was priveleged and that that's why folk liked him, but, in a way he is: he's a rich man who looks it and is defined in his first moments by his handsomeness. during campaign 2 people wanted astrid gone and assumed she was as villainous as trent when she was essek's exact mirror but on the empire side, just a woman, and "in the way" of shadowgast. when liliana (woman, technically disabled, implied lower class), bor'dor (extremely lower class, man of color), deanna (black woman), frida (played by a man of color, of an oppressed class), & even, i will assume in the future, devexian (ultimate representative of a lower worker class oppressed people), have extremely similar stories or frankly far more valid reasons to be cautious about a god than essek, they're seen as entirely villainous with no possible redeeming quality or point, and are treated with immense scorn. meanwhile when essek starts a war by ensuring his culture's religion cannot be whole, he can easily be accepted by the fanbase, who even lambast the dynasty for daring to have a religion; thus, by their own logic, they are fully agreeing with ludinus (i am well aware of the intricacies of how the dynasty fucks up but, put this into the broader context here compared to how vasselheim is treated).

which is another reason im excited for the aeor arc; it is easy to assume essek will be there, and it will be interesting to see how his extremely blunt, delightedly-smug distaste for godhood (especially the luxon, which, didnt kill aeor like the pantheon did and is innocent in that) is framed in c3's context, and how fans respond to that. will it be entirely glossed over as people seemed to gloss over keyleth's distaste for them? will it be excused because it's cute when a man they see as a twink does it?

#van speaks #asks #critical role meta #critical role #fandom wank #long post #no way in H E L L am i maintagging the character this is about

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foolish-sparrow · 7 months

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Spin that record, babe

A/N: Due to the fact that I don't have YT premium I keep getting flash-banged by Jennie's CK ad so here we are ;-;

Warnings: Alcohol

Word Count: 0.5

The heavy bass coursed through your veins, synchronizing with the wild pace of your own heart. A concoction that left the mind flirting with a heavy fog while a sheen glossed your skin.

Even as your limbs moved with the music, your gaze remained captured, stolen by the hypnotizing woman who was dancing her way over to you.

Sometimes you absolutely hate the fact that you're head over heels for your best friend.

A free weekend was something to be enjoyed, that was something you both could agree on, but that is where the merged lines diverge.

Because while you would love nothing more than a night in, a takeaway on your lap and a favorite movie on the screen; Jennie had other ideas.

You need to be in the right mood for these things, and it takes quite a lot of effort for it to be forced upon you. But Jennie, with her big dumb smile and fluffed-up cheeks just had to look into your eyes once and you'd lost the war before the message of an oncoming attack had even been delivered.

You didn't want to kill her fun. nor did you want to ruin the shared time you had managed to align, so you tried your best to manipulate your muscles into something that was actually genuine when you smiled.

And when that didn't work, the alcohol certainly did.

You were absolutely terrible at pacing yourself, so it did not take long for that certain buzz to hit and pull you away from 'I don't want to be here' to 'This isn't so bad.'

The power of the fruity mixture felt almost liberating, to the point you didn't even notice how sagged muscles sprang back to life.

It didn't help that Jennie was so distracting.

She had taken to the dancefloor halfway through her first drink, sending you a flirtatious wink whenever your gazes would clash under the florescent lights.

There was a part of you that itched to follow, to let her siren call embrace any lasting sanity you have and break it until you're left fully submerged.

3 drinks in and you finally let go.

Her smile is equal parts excited as it is knowing; you never could deny her of anything.

The bass synchronizes with your heart upon approach, and you let its frantic pace guide your limbs until you're doing something you hope resembles dancing.

You don't actually care though, not when Jennie quickly discards any lasting distance between you, takes your hands and brings them around her frame before she's throwing her own around your shoulders.

Way more intimate than what you would usually go for, but the taste of mango on your tongue reminds you that tonight was to let go.

And so you do.

Jennie's laugh is high-pitched and so in love and it's almost as intoxicating as the alcohol in your system -- although just as addicting.

Sweat glosses your skin before long, but you're way too absorbed to focus on anything but Jennie; her glimmering eyes and blinding smile.

At some point she brings you even closer, an adventurous hand getting lost in your hair before your lips meet for a single kiss that gets disrupted by more laughter.

You can't help but to follow her lead, even when the familiarity of Lady Gaga hits your ears in the background.

Not the night you initially wanted, but God you would not have it any other way.

#blackpink imagines #blackpink scenarios #blackpink reactions #jennie imagines #jennie scenarios #girl group scenarios #girl group imagines

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littledollll · 1 year

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Hey...sorry it's me again, but since you write for wanda, can I maybe request something with a fem reader where there's a little bit of mindfuckery going on? Basically reader wakes up in some sort of new reality, in a bed made for two rather than one, blinds to let the sunlight in rather than curtains to keep everyone and everything out, but they don't really question it because it almost doesn't feel real? Kinda like a dream? And suddenly they have a girlfriend, Wanda, who dotes on them, snuggles them in bed, watches sitcoms with them, somehow knows all their skeletons in the closet (mind reading hehe) and lets them curl up on her chest and cry it out as she soothes them, makes them snacks, helps them do basic tasks when they're (super) depressed. Unbeknownst to reader, Wanda has actually torn apart the multiverse to be with them once again after having already lost them in another??? I'm sorry if this is way too much

-🧸 anon (loves you)

Mastermind

Wanda Maximoff x reader

A/n: im so behind on requests im trying believe me! Writing is getting hard :/ but! this was so fucking nice to write, yk that random motivation. when I tell u it just came to me and I couldn’t stop writing- I love love love Wanda, specially her being rly soft and lovey:( ty for your request hun.

Warnings: kinda manipulation? Hex pt.2, slightly suggestive if you squint, lots and lots of soft kisses, mentions of r struggling with anxiety and depressive episodes, lots of comfort, mostly narrated.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

A kiss. It was so soft. Intoxicatingly so. Her gentle hands cupping your face, the comforting weight of her straddling your lap made you feel grounded, and so safe. You whimpered when she parted from you, nuzzling into her chest while your arms wrapped around her. “My sweet little darling.. oh how I love you.” She whispered, her hands brushing your hair back and away from your face.

You didn’t know where this came from. Some day long ago you simply woke up and there she was. Wanda. You had a whole life with her. And somewhere between the fuzziness you remembered it all. How you met, everything from your first conversation to your first time. Your life before you got married, how you moved in together before then, and how your family disapproved of it. And god. That perfect wedding. The happiest day of your life, when it all finally came together for you, this was it. The stars aligned and have you this, gave you her.

In some part of your mind you didn’t know this woman, but at the same time you always had. You knew everything about her and she knew everything about you. Every little thing. You couldn’t bother to question it, if it was a dream then so be it, it was such a lovely dream, everything you could possibly ever want was right here. A beautiful and kind woman, with so much love and comfort to give. Wanda understood you, she allowed you to feel and cry but never alone, she was right here through it all. Allowing you to hide against her chest and pet your hair when you cried, telling you the most reassuring words, ensuring your comfort at all times.

It wasn’t a one time thing, you quickly noticed. Every day felt like a movie, every day she was the perfect woman, and she was yours. You’d watch tv together, listen to music and dance your hearts out.

Your favorite part was the cooking. Just like you were now. Both hands wrapped around her torso as you hugged her from behind, your girl, your wife. She let out an adorable giggle when you nuzzled into her neck and squeezed her tight.

“Are you planning an staying there the whole time darling or would you bother to help me out with our dinner.” She teased, her tone was scolding but so obviously not genuinely upset.

“m okay right here, my love.” Almost as if on queue the tv switched to play one of your favorite songs. You swayed with Wanda, holding her impossibly close and effectively preventing her from getting any actual cooking done which she was quick to scold you about yet again.

“If you want dinner you need to let me cook, dear.” You ignored her, sighing contently against her neck and closing your eyes. “Just gimme a minute to love on you, nothing wrong with giving my wife a little affection.” She let you. Her own arms coming to hug around yours, a bright smile painted on her face. She always looked so happy with you, even more so. It’s like all her energy recharged when you did little things like this, and the second you noticed you started doing it non-stop.

Wanda always gave you so much. She gave you her everything. The least you could do was give her these moments, ones where she took a deep breath and let her head lull to your shoulder, eyes blissfully closed and an always beautiful smile on her face. You loved this woman. Your beautiful Wanda.

“Let’s finish cooking mamá, I’ll help you.” You parted with a kiss. A sweet kiss like always, those kisses she’d giggle or smile into and give you a flirty little look, then go about her day like she didn’t know what she was doing to you. “Cut this up for me will you, darling?” You hummed and did a she asked, shaking your head to think about the now and not the events awaiting later tonight.

“Get your mind out of the gutter!” Wanda smacked you with an oven mitt furrowing her brows at you. “Dirty dirty mind.” You chucked and looked back at her. “What! I didn’t say anything” she let out a drawn out, “mhmmm” before turning back to put some ingredients in the pan. “I just know what you’re thinking. Hurry it up I need those!” “Right right! I’m sorry!”

Wanda found it odd, that making this reality with you didn’t take so much of her power like others had before. Like your own mind was subconsciously giving into her without her trying to force it. When Wanda occasionally peaked into your mind to see if any dreams or memories about your old life haunted you there was nothing. When she searched for doubts about your life or any clue that you might be figuring things out she only saw the slight confusion of those moments there your mind briefly recalled having a life without or before her, but you didn’t dwell on them, in-fact you thought of them as your anxiety messing you up but never once did you doubt her. Like you subconsciously simply refused to believe there was ever a life without her.

It was perfect. She didn’t really trick you. She just treated you like she did you from her universe, gave you their memories and anything you could possibly need. And you seemed more than content with this life, with her. She was your perfect girl, and you were her darling little love. Both of you living the life of your dreams, together.

#wanda x reader #🧸 anon #mcu wanda #wanda maxmoff x y/n #wanda maximoff #wanda marvel #wanda maximoff x reader #wanda multiverse of madness #Wanda maximoff fluff #wandavision #wanda maximov #wanda mcu #wanda fanfic #wanda x you

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dangermousie · 2 months

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I am nowhere near there (I am 5 eps in) but I rewatched the ending of TKW. Still one of my fave cdrama endings, but you know how much I love logical tragedies.

The way the lovers rush at each other, at a dead run. MMMM.

What I really love is that he sees her flip the dagger so the hilt would hit him, not the blade, but as she intended, sees it too late to stop the momentum of his sword. So he stabs her fully aware she did not intend to kill him and helpless to stop it. AAAA so good! (Side note - and clearly, if she meant to kill him, they'd have killed each other - since her hilt went to his heart.)

The way it flashes back to her doing the same thing playfully during their happy days...

God, so gooooood!

She may say it's so loss would make him a good king but let's face it - it's because she couldn't bear to live with knowing she loved a monster. His confrontation with Jing Ke was the final curtain being ripped from her delusion, wasn't it? He loved her. He was also EVIL. She fell in love with a monster. She thought she reformed him but well - I want to say he softened for her as much as he could for anyone - but he could never be a good person in general - he just hid his teeth and claws for her but they were never gone. And she's not the woman who could close her eyes forever, was she?

I love love love the aftermath, his walking out with the bloodied sword, all those subjects kneeling and he's all powerful and all alone, and all he has is the knowledge that due to his lack of trust, he killed the one person he loved, with his own hands.

The way he drops his sword, collapses on the ground and just starts SCREAMING!!!!!

And all the underlings, unmoving, unquestioning as the supreme ruler of their world has a breakdown - absolute terror and absolute loyalty and absolute obedience on display. And absolute and utter loneliness. Forever.

And the little coda, of them as three little happy children, making wishes. And his wish was to be feared not for power or for kicks but to protect those he loves. And here he is, utterly feared but having driven away, lost or killed everyone he's ever wanted to protect.

The way it transforms at his adult self looking at them...

And then even their shades disappear and he's left all alone, crying. And the drama ends.

God, I love that ending! Just as Goodbye My Princess, it's so utterly logical in its tragic inevitability. The protag is left in hell, hell he made with his own two hands, and it could never end otherwise.

I've seen people complain that (a) they wanted a happy ending (b) they felt betrayed that all the mellowing we saw early was not real but (a) it's freaking Qin Shi Huang, what kind of happy ending romance could you expect and (b) the ending was so logical to me and did not feel a betrayal that a lot of his newly found "kindness" was an act - it's very clear that he loved her but it's also clear that he was also willing to do whatever to keep her - I don't think even he himself knew what in what he portrayed was real and what was acting - he just knew she could never stay with the true him and so presented whatever he could so she'd stay. His feelings were real, his vulnerability was real, his desperation was real. I think even some of his mellowing was real - but so was the darkness and manipulativeness and desire to playact whatever as long as he got what he wanted - his whole character was "ends justify the means," wasn't it? Ultimately, he was a man she loved, but he was never going to be a man she could respect or look up to or relate, and I think he knew it, subconsciously, and put on masks, but they all failed and here we are. (The thing with her child - we saw him murder his own half brothers in ep 5! He would tolerate her child with another man for as long as he had to if it was the price for having her - and that alone shows how much he wanted her - and I think on some level he was even genuinely fond of the kid - but he was never going to let the kid stand in the way of his plans for the world or for anything, really. Hell, he ultimately didn't even let her stand in the way and he adored her and loved her as much as he was capable of loving anyone.) I think some viewers felt betrayed because they were hoping for the good, old-fashioned "good woman reforms bad man through love of her" narrative, but this drama went the realistic way of "bad man loves good woman, remains bad." (And it gave us plenty of warning, but hey, we are all romantics so I can see how you'd hope anyway.)

#cdrama #zhang bin bin #dilraba dilmurat #the king's woman

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abloomingsunflower · 5 months

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Meet Snowflake!

[E.L.A oc's go brrrr-..]

[I haven't introduced her yet so- I'm doing it now. This is her official design because I wasn't sure about the old one-]

Basic information:

Snowflake is Albedo's adopted daughter, who apparently can control winter. But she can't control her ice power very well, which results in little accidents to happen often. Hope is training her.

She's 18 years old, a month younger than Lux, 5'6 ft tall and enjoys reading Marvel comics.

Snow is a menace to society/aff

She is Lux's non-blood related long lost twin/j/nsrs

Snowflake is a descendant of Quetzalcoatl, the deity of war. Corr.Nightmare tried to kill her once he found out about her existence. The girl fought back as best she could but was quickly overpowered. Luckily she was saved from "an mysterious winged lady".

Now Snowflake is striving to control her power better and learn more about her ancestor.

(Fun fact: Her real name is Estelle. Snowflake is just a nickname.)

Origins:

It's unknown who her parents are or where they are. But Snow never bothered to find that out.

"They abandoned me, whoever they are. Valid reason or not, I'm better off without them right? I'm sure they must've thought the same. My life is fine as it is, I already have an amazing adoptive father."

Snowflake is actually a part of Quetzalcoatl's soul, his will. All those years ago when he died, a part of him refused to give up. He refused to succumb to the fatal wounds. He refused to let his kingdom fall in the hands of his enemy.

So that strong determination caused a part of his soul to separate from it's owner. It reincarnated as different people over the years, while Quetzalcoatl wandered the earth as a spirit.

Now, Snowflake is the current reincarnation.

Only when Corr.Nightmare gets killed and the kingdom is free, Quetzalcoatl will finally rest and his will shall return to him.

Abilities:

-Summoning weapons made out of ice.

-Manipulating the weather.

-Control over ice in general.

-Can survive just fine in extremely cold temperatures.

-Can sense and distinguish people's different auras, including the dead's. (But she can't see the dead, which makes it difficult to guess who it is. She can find out from the aura alone if the spirit is a threat or not.)

-Can create snow giants and creatures.

[Will be updated.]

Her opinion on the people she knows:

-Albedo.

"We met when I tried to run away from the orphanage. Then as I went further and further away, I bumped into him. He asked me why was I crying, and he comforted me. He took me back to the orphanage and on the way we were talking and getting along. When we arrived, he told the caretaker he wanted to adopt me. Much to my own surprise. Now here we are. He's actually a very supportive dad, the kind of dad everyone would want, to be honest. No matter what, he always thinks about me first. He comforted me when I cried, defended me on arguments, never turned a blind eye on me, and even gives great advice. He is the reason I'm happy."

-Cross.

"That baker my dad likes so much. His pastries are awesome! He's a nice guy, really. I genuinely think him and Albedo would make a good couple, I mean- Have you seen the way they look at eachother?? They NEED to get together already, I swear to god-"

-Dream.

"I love and respect uncle, but- Someone needs to teach him how to be less oblivious of your surroundings. He's blind when it comes to love, and I can tell he would be an easy target to manipulate..- I noticed he looks down sometimes, maybe because of his marriage?"

-Ink.

"The second most beautiful woman? Her? Are you kidding me? Ink is nice and all but not only does her sense in fashion suck, she's also kinda dumb. I'm just being honest! She's a mother, a grown ass woman, yet she's almost never by her husband's or kids' side, or anywhere near the castle. I swear I saw her in a bar drinking once. No, twice. That second time there was a strange man with her. I just kept walking to avoid being seen by her."

-Palette.

"We only really meet when uncle Dream invites me and dad over. Sometimes we talk. Lux told me he used to bully her and frame her for things she didn't do when they were younger. Even now, he's doing some pretty bad stuff. But he looks..Well. Miserable. I almost feel bad for him sometimes. Maybe he is getting his stress out on her? Anywho I can only suggest one thing for him: Therapy. And I will drag him there by the feet if I have to."

-Lux.

"We're complete polar opposites, and still get along just fine. I can't help but see her like a sister I never had. She's got everything! Is a princess, does nice things, is rich and lucky in lottery, has amazing dresses, has a handsome fiancée, is famous and all, and she's very pretty! Like, damn!- I think she really deserves all those. I'm glad she's not like those corrupt rich people, she actually donates to charities and orphanages. I look up to her a lot. In fact, I want to be like her."

-Hope.

"Miss Hope is the one training me and Lux's fiancée. They are so skilled..! It's hard to keep up with them sometimes during sparring. They've beat me countless times.. But I won't give up there! No way in hell. This is to get revenge on that bastard for nearly murdering me.."

-Merciless.

"Him and Lux seem perfect, to be honest. We get along very well. I've read almost all the books he wrote. He's like an older brother to me. Apparently, he wants to be a wizard. He's trying to make fire, like Miss Hope. Though..once I accidentally froze him- I don't understand how it happened, I was just patting his shoulder and then BAM! Thank god we had Miss Hope and their fire. I apologized so much that day..I'm still embarrassed."

-Angst.

"..I've heard about that guy. Isn't that the one that can see spirits? I think he could help me, something with a powerful aura has been following me around for days on end and I need answers."

-Artemis.

"She's that famous singer, and Merciless' little sister. Not gonna lie, she makes amazing music..I listen to it all the time. Some of her songs are calming and perfect for reading. She's also Palette's best friend. I think these two are in love, even their fans are making rumors about them being together-"

-Goth.

"She used to make fun of me and bother me at every chance she got. Along with that group of fans- Until..well, I snapped one day. I caused a snow storm, since I felt overwhelmed. It blew everyone away but her. I think I shoved her away after that, but then realized I didn't die. At first I thought 'Maybe it's my power', until I found out from Idiotka that a grim reaper's soulmate doesn't die from their touch. ..Nothing is confirmed yet. Because apparently Lux and Palette didn't die from Goth's touch either. This situation is very confusing. Anyways, we became friends in hopes of finding out. All we do is hang out and gossip about every single thing we can think of. It's actually nice being around Idiotka.."

-Corr.Nightmare/Alphonse.

"Can you believe Artemis speaks good about a moron like that? He clearly didn't think twice before deciding to attempt murdering a little girl, so why should I feel sympathy for a tyrant? I still remember his face... ... He scares me. What if I fail to kill him?"

-Killer.

"I don't believe she chose to marry him on her own will. What kind of psycho would?? I feel bad for her. She's very pretty too."

-Crescent.

"Isn't that the priest in that one church..? I dunno, I'm not religious. So I don't visit churches at all. But his face reminds me so much of that bastard.."

-Quetzalcoatl.

"My ancestor! I'm gonna call him grandpa, it's easier. Man, I wish I could meet him.. Idiotka took me to this secret library and I've been studying about his history. I have to say, I admire him even more now. As I read all those history books, I pictured the sceneries of the old kingdom in my head. For some reason, everything described there feels so familiar.."

Fun facts:

-She's allergic to chocolate, so she is always eating fruit pastries or vanilla. She found that out when she once tried chocolate cake in Cross' café.

-Snowflake is a fan of horror games and movies, even playing with Goth sometimes.

-She never really had real friends until she met Goth. Snow only had a small group of online friends.

-Albedo's nickname for her is "Tuna", which Snow is always complaining about.

-Snowflake always wondered about the identity of the winged woman who saved her that day. She wishes to thank her.

-She has a true/guardian form <3

-She is the key to Surprise Ending in Sunflower AU.

[If she interacts with Angst and Angst decides to tell her about the timelines, the two of them will try to make Cross and Hope tell the truth to everyone and the game will end.]

Evil Lux AU and all the characters made by @anotherrosesthatfell <33

Snowflake belongs to me.

#a sunflower in full bloom au #evil lux au #snowflake [e.l.a]#character info #oc design #fun facts #idk what i'm doing with life.

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skyliv · 7 months

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tl:dr im gay i love my loser wife and i needed to drop this headcanon/scenario

god forbid a woman has hobbies

I know Liv is ruthless, yeah everyone who watched itsv knows this, i dont personally like the ideas that she was just a manipulative monster at Alchemax to Ohnn and everyone else, but she would be more than willing to pull some strings (based on an old director quote.) One thing I cling onto like a little creature is that Fisk overworks everyone, and that at multiple points she actually expresses genuine concern for the preservation of her work. She just has to put up with him for that (checks notes) 10 billion dollars.

(More below, mainly about the Spot and her position as Doc Ock, and art)

Based on the incomplete stare of the collider in the first movie, it's obvious that their research took a LONG time, so for anyone being in such a perpetual state of moral ambiguity and stress could definitely warp a person. I'm not brushing off any of her bad traits, i heart toxic yuri (/lh obvs,) but for her especially I just felt like dropping all this off here. The strain of her relationships with everyone around her probably doesn't help either, her past with May, her isolation, think Reagan Ridley idk

Unbridled comical villainy definitely does shit to a mf

Yes! She stole Johnathan's base work and had ignored him, and that's still a shit move, but I'd chock that up to her fear of her own failure and the recognition of another for something she'd been trying so hard to learn about. She's probably very focused and deliberate in her work, prone to unwanted distractions and easily annoyed, another possibility of her definite distaste to him.

I usually use this idea for writing, but something else I hold dear is if she survived and was thrown to another universe after the one deleted scene. There, she jumps in literally as it's being destroyed, something she's probably put decades into, only preserved by her impulse to try and achieve more from it. She's beaten and bruised and in the stark contrast of a new universe, she's alone again. I write that she gets tossed to my sona's universe because I'm VERY cringe, but any can apply. The hard mask of Ock breaks, and she's just left an older woman with some big multiversal dream. (In retrospect she'd probably just brush it off but idcidc she deserves comfort)

This self indulgent dumpster fire goes onto Sky-Spider finding her, and thereafter being one of the first people who treated Liv like a person in a long time.

#doc ock #olivia octavius #across the spiderverse #into the spider verse #self ship #spiderman #spiderman itsv #spidersona #spiderverse fanart #oc x canon #if you read this i will WEEP /pos #selfship shenanigans #the spot #headcanon #scenarios #johnathan ohnn

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trickster-archangel · 8 months

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Random thoughts about Hawaii Five-0 rewatch: part 1/?

So, as someone of my mutuals already knows, I'm currently undergoing the exhausting task of checking all the fucking 61 DVDs from the H50 box set before the 30-days guarantee expires, because it's physically impossible to watch them all completely in that time, even if I took 1 month leave. So I'm simply skipping back and forth and leaving the regular rewatch for when my life will be less of a living hell...so, supposedly around 2038...

I have one complaint, which is the subtitles are not completely matching all dialogues, but since my brain only needs them until it's switched to English-mode and I can start understanding it again, I guess it's alright. Second complaint: they're fucking HUGE and OVERLAPPING THE SCENES SO RANDOMLY IT HURTS.

Anyway, I've by now processed only s1-s5, and dude....some things I caught in the deleted scenes (which I've watched entirely) AND in some parts of the commentaries I specifically sought because curiosity won, and which I've never seen giffed or captioned....man, I was so angry and disappointed at times. So I thought I'd be randomly processing them here, no pics sorry, only thoughts.

~~~~~~more under the cut~~~~~~

Thought #1: Alex and Scott goofing around.

Trust me. The gag reels are so much better than you'd expect. At times I was genuinely laughing to tears and god knows how rare it is.

What I loved most was to watch that scene where Alex and Scott start cussing in Italian, and I bet no one who's not Italian could understand a fuck about what they're yelling. Best part, though, were the subtitles, captioning ALEX AND SCOTT: SWEARING IN ITALIAN 😂 Just to make sure what language exactly they were using.

Thought #2: missed chance to make Amber's character less of a plastic doll, or: Why did you fucking cut those 57 seconds?!?!

While watching s5 deleted scenes, I stumbled upon two real jewels from the 24th episode. I'm still trying to understand why they couldn't include them in the canon episode, since both of them combined are less than a minute and surely there were other moments that could've been cut. My only explanation, sadly, is that it would've painted Amber in quite a different light, making her a stronger, rounder character, and giving her an agency we rarely saw in her, except when confronting her ex husband. They could've followed that route, but we cannot have a beautiful woman who's also her own person, a self-confident person, and not just a plastic Barbie doll, right?! God forbid a woman can have agency and call out men on their bullshit, it would threat masculine privilege too much....

So, what exactly happened that bothered me so deeply? (Be aware I'm quoting by heart and not literally, as I didn't take screenshots and anyway I can't make gifs. Also, the following meta is just my interpretation of the implications running through subtext).

The first scene is very short, just six or seven seconds long, but it's a jewel in subtext and non-verbal communication. It takes place presumably after or around the moment Rachel tells Danny about Charlie: we see them from afar, clearly in a street-taken point of view, from an external observer. They are agitated and distressed, Rachel more than Danny, who's tensely spread on the bench with his arms looped behind the backrest, angling far from Rachel's compact and almost self-hugging frame.

They're distressed, not happy, not even remotely connecting to each other, so it's clear it's not a scene which could be envisioned as romantic. It's only a couple of seconds long, and then we see whose this external point of view belongs to: Amber. Amber who's not an idiotic, mellow, shallow doll. Amber who's been so clearly upset by Danny's lie about the texts, that she decided to follow him to the place Rachel had indicated. Amber who's been manipulated and controlled and abused long enough to become suspicious and self-preserving when someone she loves, and who knows her vulnerability, tries to play her around. Amber who looks at them, and clearly isn't angry nor jealous, because those few moments the actress uses to convey all of Amber's inner distress, are some of her best ones (giving that the actress, alas, is not very expressive to begin with), and we understand that she doesn't see any romance in the air. She's disappointed. She's hurt. Betrayed. Again.

Amber's face, in a handful of seconds, perfectly displays the devastating feeling of someone who finally felt safe and respected and secure, only to discover that it's yet another kind of control and manipulation, less cruel, less brutal, but not less humiliating and even worrying.

This is something she's learnt at her expense, and now that she knows the red flags, she cannot trust a man who can't be honest with her, not with this kind of problems, not with something which is clearly affecting his life to a deep level. He wants Amber to be a part of his life, but only if he can control the terms, limits, boundaries and times of their relationship. And Amber has been through it all before, and can't trust that history won’t repeat itself.

She then drives away, hurt and disappointment written all over her face.

The second deleted scene is even more important plotwise, because it explains Amber's absence as Danny’s plus one at Kono's wedding, after all the talk he did in the car about bringing some Amber's friend as Steve's date, and it casts a new light over Danny's reaction to Steve's resolve to ask Cath to marry him, or his tension about Lynn, or Amber's condistent absence for the whole first part of s6, or even Danny's and Amber's fight during their Valentine's dinner.

The scene is longer, about fifty seconds, and it supposedly takes place right at the end of the episode, after Danny pulls up at the hospital's parking lot, after Steve's affectionate text. He takes his phone out of his pocket again because he's received a voice-mail message.

A message from Amber (sorry, I noticed just now I'm still going with Amber instead of Melissa).

She says she's sorry to be doing this by voice-mail because she'd prefer to do it in person, but given their situation it's probably for the best if she spares them both the trouble to be forced to find shallow excuses. She says he's an amazing man, and that she likes what they have and that she thinks it might be real, and that she hopes he feels the same. She's understanding that his job comes first and it's terribly demanding, as she's also aware of how hard his life and his backstory is, with Grace and Rachel. This all considered, she thinks it's best if they stop and take a pause, so that he can reflect and decide if he wants to keep this thing going, but as for now, she can't keep seeing him on these terms.

Amber decided to stop seeing Danny until he decided what to do with their relationship and be honest with her, and started thinking seriously if he was just using her, as she probably felt.

Why?? Why did they cut this whole plotline? It's pivotal for Danny's arc, for his strained and angry attitude towards everyone, for his constant distress, for his even worsening negativity, for the way he's overcompensating with excessive euphoria to Steve's announcement about Cath, for how he meddles with them and confronts Cath about being honest, for how he's not thrilled about Lynn's insertion inside Steve's life.

Because he's alone, at that time. Call it temporary breakup or period of reflection or a break, but he was single and thinking, again, about everything he was doing wrong with his life and his relationships, and falling again into his old black hole of depression and self-sabotage, and seeing Steve going on with his life even at the cost of pretending he was happy with this woman he had supposedly no trouble cheating on, during their "couple retreat", making him wonder if either what he had with Lynn wasn't serious, or if his obvious charade about his threesome with Alyssa and her friend had a second meaning.

Also, they were probably both single again, or at least testing the waters, when they were at the retreat. And Danny definitely was when Cath left Steve once again abandoned, betrayed, and never-chosen in face of anything else.

Quite a lot of subtext to think about, for just 57 seconds which were, prudently, cut.

#h50 #mcdanno #steve mcgarrett #danny williams #h50 5x24 #danny/melissa unhealthy relationship #rachel edwards #h50 meta #h50 rewatch #h50 deleted scenes #h50 gag reels #long post #amber vitale #melissa armstrong #alex o'loughlin #scott caan

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simplegenius042 · 3 months

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Music Monday

Tagged by @josephseedismyfather

Tagging @socially-awkward-skeleton @shallow-gravy @inafieldofdaisies @strangefable @strafethesesinners @direwombat @derelictheretic @titiagls @wrathfulrook @carlosoliveiraa @adelaidedrubman @thewanderer-000 @henbased @josephslittledeputy @direwombat @g0dspeeed @nightbloodbix @afarcryfrommymain @voidika @ladyoriza @florbelles @vampireninjabunnies-blog @minilev @snake-in-the-garden @softtidesworld @onehornedbeast @cassietrn @chazz-anova @megraen @deputyash @dephellseed @deputy-morgan-malone @skoll-sun-eater @fourlittleseedlings @la-grosse-patate @cloudofbutterflies92 @starsandskies and @i-am-the-balancing-point + anyone else who wants to join in. Here's my taglist.

Three songs for The UnTitledverse, Wings And Horns' original spin off trilogy and Far Cry The Silver Chronicles below the cut.

First is "My Ordinary Life" for the main antagonist of The UnTitledverse, Zachariah the Orchestrator, the "Hand at Fate's Table" and the second-borne Eldritch that is the center point of majority of the multiverse's issues.

youtube

"They tell me that I'm special, I smile and shake my head I'll give them stories to tell friends about the things I said They tell me I'm so humble, I say I'm turning red They let me lie to them and don't feel like they've been misled They give so much to me, I'm losing touch get me? Served on a silver platter, ask for second they just let me

They tell me I'm a god, I'm lost in the fascade Six feet off the ground at all times I think I'm feelin' odd No matter what I make, they never see mistakes Makin' so much bread, I don't care that they're just being fake They tell me they're below me, I act like I'm above The people blend together but I would be lost without their love

Can you heal me? Have I gained too much? When you become untouchable you're unable to touch Is there a real me? Pop the champagne It hurts me just to think and I don't do pain."

Silva may not be aware of it, but she actually has a rivalry with the Voice, or at least her supernatural Third Eye does. Abridged explanation of the Third Eye: some mystical entity commonly tied to the human soul but doesn't necessarily need to be to help its user, usually just retains memories and personality to give some back to the renewed soul upon reincarnating so the variants of the person don't become carbon copies, however instances like Silva and Paul who don't have a soul (due to the circumstances of their "births") they instead only build up their own Third Eye to protect themselves, which gives them back their memories, personality and skills into their next lives deep in their subconscious, so while they don't consciously remember most familiar things they instinctively do and gravitate towards that. The Third Eye also has an OP mode and can enhance the user who is aware and works symbiotically with it in ways humans back in the beginning of the multiverse could do. Paul realized this and gave Silva some subtle lessons (never explicitly saying what it was for) so Silva just thought it was meditation to make her more spiritual with her soul or something and doesn't actually realize until much, much later in her life that she's powerful enough to kill a God if she wanted to. There's a lot more for the Third Eye but I'll explain in a more detailed post.

Anyway, the Voice genuinely hates Silva for constantly foiling its plans in some shape or form, especially by the time of Silva's Hope, as the Voice hasn't exactly made itself look capable of governing one corner of the universe to its extremely cruel and unforgiving superior. And since the Voice is very biased and hypocritical on why "a deputy woman trying to live a normal life is more deserving of torment and needless suffering than the the prophet who killed his daughter for it and the other prophet who gaslit, gatekeeped, manipulated, mansplained, manwhored and manslaughtered his way through life", once Silva becomes aware of the Voice, its on sight. Anyway song below:

youtube

"Kill me again, again and again But I come back knowing so much more Learning all your tricks I'll make you sick Because the truth is...* I'll make you quit."

"Try to stay [first], [have to] stay first** You're still good-good, admit to this Don't fight anymore, it's such a snore One more step, and I'll make it war."

"And I still love the way I "hurt" you."

"It's determination, whoa-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-yeah Whoa-oh-oh-oh, whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-yeah.

I love the way, I love the way I love the way you keep on trying I love the way (I love the way), I love the way (I love the way) I love the way you keep on dying."

(* = Obviously I had to emit Sans name due to that probably not being the Voice's name ** = The Voice is against Silva, and since Frisk is from Undertale, I had to adapt the lyrics here a bit)

A song for the unnamed original trilogy I'm working on, which spins off from the events of Wings And Horns, but focusing on two characters who appeared in it, unnamed but can confirm they're both women, with one being trans. This pair are the first humans to have ever explored the Multiverse, and the trilogy will be following their story in life, navigating the aftermath of the abolishing of the soulmate system, discovering + exploring the Multiverse, and seeking out the Wheel of Reincarnation in the Afterlife, while facing internal and external problems, the most prominent being the Mad Kin of Carnage himself, Discord.

youtube

"I'm born to run, down rocky cliffs Give me grace, bury my sins Shattered glass and black holes Can't hold me back from where I need to go

Whoa-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh-oh-oh Oh, oh, oh-oh-oh-oh

Yellow hills and valleys deep I watch them move under my feet Stranger things, have come and gone To see the world and take the throne

Don't hold back Oh, I won't hold back

I'm gonna live my life like I'm gonna die young Like it's never enough, like I'm born to run I'm gonna spend my time like tomorrow won't come Do whatever I want, like I'm born to run

I wanna see Paris (Hey), I wanna see Tokyo I wanna be careless (Hey), even if I break my bones I'm gonna live my life like I'm gonna die young Like it's never enough, like I'm born to run.

A winding road, where strangers meet To feel the love of a warm drink My body moves, it's speaking loud Don't have to say what I'm thinking now

Don't hold back Oh, I won't hold back

I'm gonna live my life like I'm gonna die young Like it's never enough, like I'm born to run I'm gonna spend my time like tomorrow won't come Do whatever I want, like I'm born to run

I wanna see Paris (Hey), I wanna see Tokyo I wanna be careless (Hey), even if I break my bones I'm gonna live my life like I'm gonna die young Like it's never enough, like I'm born to run.

All these things, I've seen and done I live my life like I'm born to run All these things, I've seen and done I live my life like I'm born to run All these things, I've seen and done (I was born, born, born, born, born to run) I live my life like I'm born to run (I was born, born, born, born, born to run)

I'm gonna live my life like I'm gonna die young Like it's never enough, like I'm born to run I'm gonna spend my time like tomorrow won't come Do whatever I want, like I'm born to run

I wanna see Paris (Hey), I wanna see Tokyo I wanna be careless (Hey), even if I break my bones I'm gonna live my life like I'm gonna die young Like it's never enough, like I'm born to run.

Oh, oh, oh, oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh Oh, oh, oh-oh-oh-oh Oh, oh, oh, oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh Oh, oh, oh-oh-oh-oh!"

#music monday #the untitledverse #oc: zachariah the orchestrator #big bad of the untitledverse is jealous of the attention humanity gets #far cry the silver chronicles #far cry 5 #oc: silva omar #fc5 the voice #the voice #hell its not even joseph that silva hates its the fact that joseph represents the voice and that's what her third eye recognises #but since silva isn't aware of the voice's existence #she goes to put this hate that she never held before towards joseph (and justifies the reasoning behind it by pointing at his actions)#wip: wings and horns #original unnamed trilogy #original works #coming up with titles is hard #but i will persevere past this #also funny how this trilogy is the planned end yet chronologically timeline-wise the beginning of the stories (not excluding WAH)

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